# coping with fertility treatment



## lauramcd21 (Jun 5, 2012)

Hi ladies, I have been trying to conceive for years and have been on the waiting list for ICSI for 30 months.  We have finally started treatment and are currently on day 4 of upregulators.  I am taking gonal f maximum dose due to low AMH and I have also been given an additional injection of Luveris to improve egg quality.  We are delighted and very lucky to be given this opportunity by the NHS and I am praying everyday that I become a mother someday.  I have tried to prepare myself for the treatment since I discovered what was involved but nothing has prepared me for how tough it is once it started.  I am terrified of needles however recognise that I need to deal with it if I want to have a chance of being a mother.  My husband is administering the injections and is doing a wonderful job.  However I am really struggling with it. I am trying to be brave and trying not to moan however I could do with some support from others who are going through this stage or have experienced the feelings that I am describing.  Since the injections started four days ago I am becoming increasingly distressed and very upset.  Every day the injections become more painful and the luveris injection is very nippy.  I am really struggling and finding it rather traumatic.  The best way I can describe it at the moment is that I feel like I have been turned inside out and hit by a bus.  I have my scan at GRI on 5th July and I plan to discuss whether I can get a pre-med before egg retrieval as I am worried that I will be very distressed before the procedure.  My stomach is bruised and bleeding and I am running to the loo constantly.  Have anyone else experienced this and the feelings I describe?  I would welcome some support.  Thanks.


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## New-wife2009 (Mar 15, 2013)

I've had IUI (about to start IVF) and although I didn't have as many bruises, I did suffer with hormonal changes. However, I'm struggling emotionally this time as we've recently discovered that our probable reason for infertility lies with me, which I'm struggling with a lot. And facing the possibility of never becoming a mother naturally. I'm happy to keep in touch with you to keep supporting? Xxx


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## zedzed (Jun 25, 2013)

Hi,

*New wife* - you are not alone (we are all in this boat together), different scales but emotionally and mentally we are dealing with things that are out if our control. I really hope and pray you'll be a mother soon, please don't give up


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## zedzed (Jun 25, 2013)

Hi *Laura*,

Hope your well?

Keep thinking of the positives (that brings you forward), if you think of the negatives (it's will only take you backwards). Okay I'm not saying ivf /iui is walk in the park, but you need to believe you are and can be stronger 

I've been ttc for several years too, I ask this question most day: 'dear God, why am I not a mother?', what have a done wrong? Can't I make a good mother? 
But I have a firm belief that when the timing is right it will be 

So the plus side is you started your treatment yayyy 
Nobody like needles but here's a few ideas / suggestions:

- try pinching the area your going to administer the injection 
(That made it less painful for me)
- insert lightly, avoid nerve endings (if that's possible lol), and slowly insert injection ( I dont know how people jab themselves)
- try breathing exercises count 10-1 backyards 
-try singing a song or humming a beat
- tap the syringe gently to remove any air bubbles
- some people numb the area with ice (maybe you could try it eh?)
But worth running it past your clinic etc
- remember nobody likes injections, and we are brave women going through one of the toughest trails in our life....so you can do it
Ermmm learn to accept or 'like' your injection (and think you won't let it get in the way).

Sorry I know it's easier said than done, but believe in yourself and your half way there 

I am sure most clinics normally sedate the patient before egg collection, speak to you clinic about this.

I'm here if you need any help
Xx


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## New-wife2009 (Mar 15, 2013)

Zedzed thank you so much for your post. You are totally right in every point you make. I've woken feeling totally positive again - this IS going to work. Might not be first time but I've got 3 goes, plus FET if I have any spares! 

Laura, another tip for the jags is to try to make sure the needle goes in at about 90 degrees to your body - I always found them much sorer if I didn't get the angle right. And I agree about the pinching your skin too. Sometimes you might get a duff needle, so if it feels like its still going to hurt when you've tried the hints, ditch it and try a fresh one. 
Xxx


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## marionm (Jul 20, 2010)

Hi Laura,
Sorry you are having such a tough time,thought I would see if I could help a bit.
I have a huge needle phobia but had to overcome this....2 ivf cycles later I still hate needles but feel very proud of myself for being able to do the injections myself-I always wanted to do them myself as I felt more in control & felt I was doing something to help my wee eggs! The only time my husband done my injection I felt agitated because I wasn't in control. Once you have done it yourself once you will feel so chuffed!!
Your hormones will be all over the place so be kind to yourself & take 1 day at a time. 
As for the egg collection,you will be in & out before you know it! You will think it never even happened...honestly! It's so quick & painless. 
The whole process is so tough but you will get through it,just treat each stage as a step closer to a wee baby-this helps you keep focused & positive.
I'm just about to start ivf number 3 so I'm telling myself to get my positivity up! 
Any questions just ask. 
Marion x


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## zedzed (Jun 25, 2013)

Hi ladies,

*New-wife2009*- glad I could give you some words of encouragement.
, During this whole process there are going to be 'up' and 'down' days, be kind to yourself and hopefully you'll come out the other end singing 
Good luck with your journey.

Oh yes, I agree about angling the injection at 90degrees to help it to ease in, if its a duff needle, just discard and start with a fresh one (happened to me a few times), no big deal!!

*Marion* - hope your well? Good luck with you ivf cycle.
Like you I refuse to have anyone do my injections, because I knew my pain threshold and when to stop.

Also it's a mini victory everytime to do one, its that tiny step closer to having a baby.
*Laura* - if you prefer got your husband to do them, that's fine too.

Keep strong and good luck


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

hi i can understand.  Im not scared on needles but i always seem to faint!  i would ecco what marion said, i started off with my dh doing it for me and toward the end i could easily do it for myself.  I would suggest trying not to think too much about it and then when the time comes, just get on and do it!  For me the build up was always the worst thing.  Your first ivf is always very intense, and you just mull your way through.  Stay focused and determined.  I had 4 rounds of treatment before i became pregnant, iv now got a 15 week old daughter. Totally worth it. xx


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## lauramcd21 (Jun 5, 2012)

Thank you very much ladies for all your replies this is a big help.  My husband does my injections as I can't bear to look and I feel sorry for him as I get so distressed it makes him feel awful that he's giving me the injections .  I feel really guilty because I know he's doing a wonderful job.  I'm trying to stay positive hoping itl be worth it if I get pregnant  but its just so hard as the jags are becoming more painful each day.  Tried alternating sites , ice cubes and pinching skin but not helping.  I will try alternative needle incase it is a blunt one.  Keeping everything crossed and I know il get through this no matter what as I'm desperate to be a mother.  

New wife - Would like to keep in touch thank you. I  am also a new wife having got married on 30th march 3013.  We thought it would be a nice thing to organise while waiting for our treatment.  X


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## New-wife2009 (Mar 15, 2013)

HI Laura, I'm sorry that the injects are not getting easier.  I had another thought about this today - are you injecting quite close to your belly button?  I always found trying a bit lower down or to the side better, probably as I have a bit more *ahem* skin further away from my belly button.
I'm not really a new wife - just been on this forum for a while! It's our 4th wedding anniversary next week!  We started trying 3 months before we got married, as we figured I would still be ok to fit in my dress if it happened straight away...... my dress still fits 
xxx


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## lauramcd21 (Jun 5, 2012)

Hi new wife we have been injecting all over the place to avoid the same site twice.  I phoned gri today because my lovely husband thought he was helping by making up my injections last night so we wouldn't be fussing around in the morning.  god love him he was trying to alleviate my distress and didn't  know you have to inject immediately so we are now one injection short! thank goodness gri will give me it on Friday when i go for a scan.  the wonderful nurse is dropping some cream into my house tonight to try and numb my tummy before injections just to ease my distress a bit.  I feel really guilty complaining about this but bring brave and facing my needle phobia is taking its tole on me not to mention the general emotional roller coaster that we all face as a result of our experiences.  I have gained half a stone since my honeymoon in April and I never thought I'd be so grateful for it as I'm thinking its extra cushioning for injections lol.  How are you doing?x


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