# How to keep going after long conception?



## hopeful01 (Apr 4, 2016)

Has anyone got any tips to keep going/keep being positive after trying to conceive for 10 years!!!!!!I do have one daughter I conceived naturally in 2006 but like many others on here I would like another child for many reasons.Its a nightmare physically/mentally and emotionally feeling let down every month, which many other women will understand and seeing many other friends and family over the last 10 years conceive quite easily is hard to go through.I am 37 at the moment and know it is still possible to conceive as women have a few years older and have a similar amh and fsh.I am just concerned I may have many years ahead of hoping and still not becoming pregnant.How have others got through this?


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## Clairemariearan (Nov 5, 2015)

Hi hopeful01

I'm not in your situation but didn't want to read and run. My husband and I are child free but have been trying for 3.5 years. We are about to embark on IVF cycle 5.

For me staying positive is less about thinking it will happen and trying to focus on the things I love about my current life. We book regular short breaks to look forward to and always time a nice treat for after test date so if its negative I can do something I couldn't do if I was pregnant. Such as a spa weekend with jacuzzis, massages, wine and soft cheeses😊

The moments where I think it will work out for us one day are much fewer than those where I think it won't and I'm practising being ok with that.

I wish you every luck and success xxx


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## VicksterM (Jun 12, 2016)

Hi Hopeful,

We didn't have quite such a long gap but my DS is now 6 and we've been TTC for 5 years. For me, holding onto having him was the key. Especially through failed treatment cycles, disappointments and a miscarriage. You need to remember all that's good in your life (like ClaireMarie says). We're generally pretty lucky and one thing I read was to start a gratitude journal and write 3 things each day you're grateful for, before you go to bed each day. The point of it is to refocus your mind on what's good in your life and it makes you feel better too. It takes a bit of sticking with, but helped to shift my focus... And when you feel better, you're body's more likely to be ready to get all your hormones etc in balance.

You're younger than me but I've just managed to conceive again and am really hoping it'll work out, so I think it can for you too. Good luck 

ClaireMarie - hope all's well with you and you have all the luck on your side during your next cycle


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Hi hopeful

You might find the secondary infertility section helpful, here's a link http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=44.0

Dory 
Xx


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## hopeful01 (Apr 4, 2016)

hi,thanks for the kind words, hope everything goes well for you all too.Yes we do many things as a family,days out,weekends away,etc and I am grateful for my lovely daughter and husband it's just been even more difficult these past 5 years as my dad had a spinal injury and recently had a stroke and is now in a care home in quite a bad state.I've always done the best I can to help dad in many ways as we have always been close.Obviously it has been an emotional/physical /mental nightmare and has caused the family to split/arguments etc so this has not really helped with keeping positive,my dad is only 65. but I do try and pick myself up and carry on as many others have to.I know how difficult it is going through numerous ivf / icsi cycles,anyway thought i'd give some background so you can understand more how I feel.


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## LisaL29 (Apr 5, 2012)

Yes for me it's also looking at my son and knowing that no matter what I'm blessed, very blessed to have him.


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