# January matching panel/intros



## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Hi all 

I started a thread back in May when we brought our LO home...next week we have MP for LO baby sibling of 5 months. Super dooper excited!

Anyone else for jan? 

Xx


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Me, me!

We've had matching panel and start intros mid January with our little girl. Counting the days!

Congratulations, littlepoppy


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Yay & congrats for mp!

Are you finished now work wise? LO room all done?

I'm still on my first lot of adoption leave so it just gets extended by a year yahoooooooo x


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

Hi guys.....we have matching panel for 2 blues two weeks today.....do excited cannot believe it.....intros first week of feb. Finishing work 22nd jan.....buying for england ad told we could. Best Christmas and birthday present ever xxx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Congrats laws!!! Yay two blues how amazing!!! 


It's so amazing buying first time isn't it? I've gone way OTT with LO an ordered far too many clothes but oh well!!!!! 

X


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

I've got a week at work next week and then I'm off - been off for 2 weeks over Christmas so it hardly seems worth it! 

Room is all ready to go but we haven't got much in the way of clothes/toys as she has sooooo much stuff already (she's nearly two and has been with her foster family since tiny) 

That's handy with the adoption leave Poppy, I think my work have a policy where I'd have to go back for a while before being eligible for any more leave - not that were expecting any siblings anytime soon! Congrats Laws, exciting times!!


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## Rayofsunshine (Jul 28, 2013)

Hi guys 

Ur all sound at a very exciting time in your journeys and I so can't wait to b where u r! I'm due to start prep groups very soon! 2 questions- 

How long did it take u from prep group to now? 
What advise would u give me and hubby to cope with the journey? 

Ray xxx


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Hi Ray, 

We applied in Jan 2014 so almost exactly a year from application to placement for us. We were approved in July 2014 so within the 6 months guidelines. It was after approval we found hard, waiting for a match. My best advice would be: don't expect to be approved and immediately see lots of profiles. We saw two, and the second was our LO (although we were only looking for under 2 so quite a narrow criteria). We had been so focussed on getting approved that we were knocked a bit by how quiet things went afterwards. What has kept us sane was organising things to do which we knew wouldn't happen when we had a family - spa weekend, meals out etc. Gave us something to look forward to which was non adoption related. 

Best of luck! xx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Exactly what caramel said..enjoy 'you' time...one thing I wish we did was go abroad just before placement. We didn't dare incase it jinxed things an we'd need to cancel as LO moved in earlier but we should have had a week in the sun somewhere! 

Our journey was quick I think! Enquired July 13, approved feb 14, placement of lo#1 May and awaiting placement of sibling Born after.

Panel in a few days arghhhhhhh I can't wait! I keep folding an unfolding LO clothes! X


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## chadwick13 (Jun 30, 2010)

How exciting! We're not quite Jan intros, but we have our matching panel in the middle of Feb. We're not sure when the intros will start, or how long they'll last!


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Congrats chDwick  it will fly by!!!!! X


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Hi ladies, can I join you here please?

We were approved by Panel in November and have been awaiting a match. One little pink has come along and seems to tick all the boxes. Meeting with her SW next week. 
When is it possible to see a picture? We did ask our SW a few weeks back but haven't had any response. 
Seems strange that there would potentially be a matching panel without meeting/seeing a picture of her? Have I got this right?

Sorry so many questions
AJ xx


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Congrats on your link, AJ!  It seems attitudes to pictures really vary.  We saw one immediately with our Bug's profile, and several more with CPR.  Our SW was adamant it wasn't possible to form a realistic bond or feeling about how a child 'fitted' with your family without some visual medium, other SWers really feel that it fosters snap, cosmetic judgements on how 'cute' a child is.  It's a real mixed bag, but personally I'd insist on seeing a pic before the link is confirmed - a video is better, though, you could ask about that?

Considering that some children are linked through activity days etc, the insistence on 'blind' links seems a bit old fashioned to me.  

Good luck!


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

We only saw two CPRs, the second of which was our LO - but each time we had the CPR, and photos. With ours we also had a DVD which really helped. We had to force ourselves not to watch it, or look at photos until we were sure there was nothing we couldn't cope with in the CPR! 
I'm sure you'll get to see photos at the meeting - keep asking!


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

We had around 3 photos on Los profile then at pre link meet with wS & FF they brought a few more...then at meeting fc we got loads to keep..

Was no comparison to real life but having his photos in our house a month before he arrived help build that immediate love x


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Thank you so much for your replies.....lots of wisdom here I can see so I know I'm in the right place! I'm hoping at next weeks meeting we will get to see a photo if not I will challenge as there really is no reason not to see one. I know it will make it become more real. I'm a bag of nerves and excitement all rolled into one. Mentioned to a few people in work today including one who has adopted twice herself. I think the rest will be completely gob smacked! Give them all something else to talk about anyway as we have had pregnancy talk and scan photos constantly recently as one of my colleagues has found out she is expecting ( always hard to stomach over lunch!)

Hope everyone else is doing ok?

AJ x


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Aj you totally deserve to show your potential LO off! I think everyone was sick of my updates but I couldn't care less! Even more so as we're having LO baby sibling it's double the irritating updates! 

I am SO excited for panel! Just want it official, were going to celebrate after in same way as first sibling...lovely meal for two! Arghhhhh can't wait! X


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Little poppy I feel really excited for you knowing you are so close. When is panel? X

I spoke to a friend earlier who was one of our referees and is a SW who used to work in adoption plus has adopted a child herself.... She has been such an influence in my decision to adopt and has tried to calm my nerves a bit by telling me we will make great parents etc but actually I feel more anxious now, almost like I owe her something, or don't want to get it wrong etc. Silly really I know but I'm sure a lot of the nerves are normal? Also spoke with my colleague who has adopted and she was giving me some thoughts on questions to ask next week and things that we will need to sort early on...scary this could happen really soon and not prepared at all!

What have others done in regard to buying things and preparing when at this early stage? I'm worried that its going to be a manic time if/when we get the go ahead but I dont want to tempt fate either!
AJ x


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Ah aj we was naughty an brought/decorated room even before we was approved as adopters. I think it did away us towards our boy, everything I brought was his age and the bedroom although unisex was very boyish.

Questions, so is this the meeting LO social worker? I think there's a list on here somewhere. You'll want to ask about if only child foster home, if they get on with children there & really get all the questions about CPR in. I found SW didn't actually know a lot abut LO it wS more FC meeting we took a lot of info away! 

Very excited for you!

We've got panel tomorrow arghhhh yay! X


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

How was matching panel, Poppy?


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Ditto Poppy...how did it go? X


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## EveyBee (Mar 17, 2009)

Hi

Not quite intros in jan but have panel end of jan! Eventually!! This is our 3rd year, we started in 2012 and we were approved sept 2013' I hate the expression but it has been a 'journey'!

All going well we should have little pink home with us middle/end of February.

We have made a start on the room last year, before everything fell through, haven't touched it since but this week I couldn't hold out any longer.  My mum made me feel better though she gave in a bought some little pink vests today!!  

Is anyone else buying things or are you managing to be good and hold on till after panel or even adm final decision?


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## Ruthie82 (Feb 5, 2011)

Hello,

Can I join?

We were going to mp 19th Jan, intros with a blue start the week after. Can't quite believe I have two more weeks of work left, eek!! What have people done to prepare themselves mentally? 

x


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

I've wrote this reply three times now...let's hope this works!

Mp was amazing! Got a lovely yes! Jst over a week till intros now :-D

Hi ruthie! I'd say enjoy couple time, late nights, late mornings, nights out days out!!!! Go to a spa! 

Eveybee hi!! We had everything ready pre first mp and se again for this mp but I can see why people want to hold back. I do find its a bit of a rush getting everything ready after panel an before intros as only 7days for some. Also FC can hang over a lot of stuff!! Check what they'll be coming with especially after Xmas too.

X


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Great news Poppy! 

Hi Ruthie and EveyBee ... Exciting times ahead! I'm not sure we did much to prepare consciously, we just tried to organise as much non adoption related things as possible so it didn't take over the world. 

We start intros tomorrow. I am beside myself!!!!


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

We didn't wait til panel to buy things/get room ready ... but that would have been sensible


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Poppy...woohoo!!!! So chuffed for you hun. Just over a week and you will be meeting your new LO, fantastic! xx 

As for getting things ready I can't help but look, long for but not buy yet although its so tempting especially with things in the sales. DH and I have done a bit of 'nesting' this weekend. We hired a rug doctor and cleaned all the carpets then cleared out some cupboards etc...its a start I guess. I just want to speed things up....

AJ xx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Best of lick for tomorrow caramel! Yay! X


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## Ruthie82 (Feb 5, 2011)

Exciting day for you Caramel Hope all is going well x x


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

Hi Carmel best of luck today enjoy every second, can't wait for our turn hehe...

Congrats poppy......are you ready? 

We have matching on Wednesday so excited xxxx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Luck not lick lol! Hope it went well! 

Laws are you ready for Wednesday? X


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Caramel....been thinking of you, I hope you have had a great day? x

Laws...Wed- so exciting. Best of luck x


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Thanks everyone, first day has been amazing, more than we could have hoped for. Little one called us mummy and dada from the start and we had a lovely few hours getting to know each other a little bit.
We know there will be tough times to come but we are are totally smitten!! 
Really good luck to everyone with panel coming up, you'll be here before you know it xx


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

We got a yes....were mummy and daddy hehe xxxx


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Laws I just got the most amazing goosebumps just reading that.  

Congratulations!


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Laws such amazing news! How are you celebrTng?

Caramel how's it going? How long are intros x


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Laws..congratulations, fantastic news!!!
Caramel...so, so exciting, I'm chuffed for you that it went so well right from the start.

May have to move myself on the February panel/intros as still seems so far away. Got the ok from LO SW today so moving in the right direction at least x

AJ xx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Aj will fly by!

Tell us about your LO . Teeny one aren't they? 5 sleeps till intros start! Starting to feel anxious about how current one (19m) will be during intros & when sibling is actually at home! X


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

Little poppy im sure it will be amazing. Defo got your hands full hehe....have been out shopping tonight for pjs nappies and clothes with my best friend was so lovely.....xxxx are you ready poppy?? Xxx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

It's been quite drawn out for us, knewabout him before he was born so we've been buying bits since then. I think we have everything, do need a gift for #1 LO from #2 which I must sort today! 

Getting very excited now the weekends here! X


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Wowsers, what a week! So far, LO is doing amazingly well and we've brought moving day forwards which is great 
I'm starting to worry about bedtime though when she moves to us, as so far she has only settled down for FC and I'm scared she freak out without her and we won't be able to soothe her :-(


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

Caramel im sure you will be fine....how long have your intros been?? When is moving in day So glad your getting on well....it must be amazing xxx


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Intros were 9 days, but we made it a day shorter at the interim review as we thought we'd hit the wall with how much LO would look to us while FC was still there as an option. So 8 days - she comes home tomorrow for good! Eeeeeek!!


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## A J (Oct 2, 2011)

Caramel tomorrow- fantastic! I'm sure you will be fine...be thinking of you, enjoy the special day  xx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Thinking of you for tomorrow caramel!


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## Wyxie (Apr 10, 2013)

What exciting times for everyone.  

Caramel, I hope the move went OK.  I think intros being over is such a complete shock to the system.  Suddenly there's no timetable to keep and no-one to say what you should be doing when, and that can be pretty scary.

It's really hard when our children want someone else, but actually it's very positive and healthy that given the choice, she wants her primary carer, hard though it is.  Children should struggle at bedtimes to start with, and even though it can be soul destroying knowing that what they really need is another person, doing everything you can to be there for them, no matter how long it takes for them to calm, settle, or just fall asleep from exhaustion, can often be the first building block in your relationship.

All the best,

Wyxie xx


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

hope all is going on caramel....

wyxie....that is a lovely statement xxxx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Hope today went well caramel  x


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Wyxie thanks for that post, it's helped a lot. We've had a few moments of crying for FC today and it helps to be reminded that that's a good thing actually!
Bedtime was much less traumatic tonight than I thought. She cried for FC at first, and so we had a cuddle in her room and talked about all the fun things we would do in the morning, and then I put her down said 'mummy and daddy will see you in the morning' and left her. She cried for a bit but a different 'sleepy' kind of cry, so I left her and she settled after a minute or two. 
Really good luck to everyone else gearing up for it!! xxx


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## EveyBee (Mar 17, 2009)

So happy for you!!!

We are at panel on Monday, IBS is playing up nicely!!!  Can't sleep- but unfortunately eating everything in sight!!  Fed up of people telling us not to get stressed and what will be will be!  Both so nervous. I think its because we are feeling confident because our bc has extra needs and also this is our last match- we cant put ourselves through it again.  It was devastating the last time it fell through before panel.


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## CaramelShortbread (Jan 27, 2013)

Best of luck EveyBee, it will be fine. Hope everyone else is doing ok? Just reporting from a few days in - we've had a good few days. LO seems to be settling well, although someone came to the door earlier and she clung to me like a limpet until he went away! She's sleeping and eating well and seems happy, and she's started crying for me, not FC when she wakes up. I keep thinking we must be missing something, it seems too good to be true?


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Caramel we felt like that with lo#1. That he attached too well, 4m later he then would then keep putting his arms upto go to strangers but at 6m he was my little cling on!! I personally wonder if something clicks with them that says 'this is real love, this is my mummy'

We're on take home day for baby#2. So ready for home as is lo#1 he's played up a bit but we're so out of routine an it's hard dividing time to both babies. Tonight will be interesting!!! X


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## Laws1612 (Dec 12, 2011)

carmel you sound like your doing a great job....enjoy every second!!

poppy....wow didn't realise you had already started good luxk today!!

10 days and counting hehe xx


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

Yay laws I'm really hoping these 10 days fly by!

We only had a short few day intro due to babies age & already having a relationship with him. Driving home now with both my gorgeous Los an can't wait to get through that front door! Queue neighbours gossiping hahahaha!


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## EveyBee (Mar 17, 2009)

Hi everyone
Just come back from panel, got a yes. Yey so happy. Feel a bit silly I got so worked up now we were in an out really quick.

Now just the wait for ratification!

Thanks for all the support x


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