# does this mean its really all over?



## larabelle (Oct 10, 2008)

hi,
sorry for the doom and gloom.ive been trying to conceive for 20 months with 2 iui's and 3 ivf/icsi with no success.im now 43,with fluctuating fsh.today went for day 3 tests and results were fsh - 29.91 and e2 - 5.my dr said the only way i can get pregnant is donor egg.i have been every month secretly hoping maybe this month it will happen,but now i know its never going to be im really struggling to accept it.

is this really all over now? or could i be clutching at straws still?

I have been having very light periods for about 4 months now which obviously means i haven't been ovulating.does this mean i have finished ovulating and wont ovulate anymore.i hope someone can answer this.thankyou for reading this post. x


----------



## bermajade (Jan 1, 2009)

Hi Larabelle, 
Your ob can tell you if you are still ovulating by checking your hormone levels at some point in your cycle, it's an easy test. I am your same age-43, and I used the clearblue fertility monitor, to tell me when I was ovulating, it measures two hormones, you pee on a stick most mornings, and it gives you your two most fertile days. If you don't ovulate it does not give fertile days. It's about $150 US dollars to purchase. It really took all the guess work out for me. 
I know it's hard to hear all the statistics and numbers, and to get a sinking feeling, it's very difficult. I'm not sure about your numbers of FSH and E2. I think you are doing the right thing and getting feedback from others that could be in the same situation as you. I really hope the best for you and that you will have the baby you yearn for in your arms very soon.


----------



## Lyzbeth (Feb 7, 2008)

Hi, I agree with Bermajade, that you should talk to your Doctor and maybe ask him to check your AMH level. 

The AMH levels correlate with the number of antral follicles present in the ovaries, so from that he can see what reserves you have. At that point you could decide if you want to move to donor eggs. For DH and I it was a hard an personal decision but after 3 failed IVF attempts we read quite a bit about the statistics when using donor eggs and we decided to continue but to use donor eggs to improve my chances of a pregnancy.

Good luck with what you decide

Beth
xxx


----------



## Val123 (Jan 24, 2009)

Hi Larabella

Sorry to hear of your struggles with infertility - my DH and I struggled with infertility for 15 years.  Several early miscarriages, ectopic pregnancy (right tube removed) failed IVF, then finally got our BFP, but lost baby at 14 weeks.  We struggled to come to terms with it and looked into every option available to us.  We decided to go down the surrogacy route, as the clinic more or less told us not to waste any more money on IVF.  They couldn't say exactly why we lost the baby, but felt there were issues with me being able to carry to full term.  It was a blow, but then we started researching surrogacy.

Each person is different.  Some women need to experience pregnancy and birth and want to carry the baby themselves and go for donor eggs, but some just want a baby in their arms and are happy to choose surrogacy.  Whatever happens don't give up on your dream - there are ways of making it happen and me and DH are living proof.  Our surrogate is 19 weeks pregnant and our baby is due on 9th April 2010.

Good luck with whatever route you choose to get your baby.

Val x


----------



## Smike (Aug 4, 2009)

Hi Larabelle

i can totally sympathise with your recent news, it`s hard to swollow. I can`t answer whether you`re still ovulating, as the other ladies have said you need a few tests for that. 

Like you i`ve had 2 failed IUI`s , and in the past 12 months i`ve had 4 failed ICSI`s , I`m 42 in Jan next year, but l have a good reserve of eggs , my prob is that the quality isn`t good enough and don`t seem to implant. After my last consultation  i`ve now gone from a 19% chance when i first started ICSI to now only a 5%, i`ve come to the sad conclusion that next time it`s DE for us, as that will hopefully give me a 60-70% chance, which is sooo much better, i understand it won`t be mine but i can`t keep throwing money, time and tears on my own eggs and end up with nothing at the end of it .
I have an appointment booked for 4th Dec with Serum in Athens and now having got my head around the DE thing, am quite excited.

How was the quality of your eggs on you past tx?  if it`s still good, then maybe pursue it, as it only takes one good egg and one good sperm
We all want the same thing at the end of the day, but how we get there is an individual decision, i`ve taken the best route that i think now suits me,and will give me the best chance, and you have to figure out the best option for yourself
I wish you well on what seems a never ending journey, i truly hope you get there in  the end whichever way you decide


Smike xx


----------



## larabelle (Oct 10, 2008)

thankyou girls for your replies,
i have decided to now try donor egg,as i really dont want to give up with this.now i have to decide what clinic as i live in turkey which unfortunately doesnt do donor egg.i have a friend who has suggested she would prob help with being a donor but im not sure if i think its better to have donor i dont know.i hope you all success in the routes you decide to go down.thankyou again.x


----------

