# The vulnerability of long-term TTC



## deedee_spark (Aug 6, 2014)

Hi,

I am trying to take a break from FF and infertility... But I keep coming back. LOL.

Anyway, this post is about how angry I feel at people taking advantage of long-term TTC.

Last year, I attended an infertility support meeting - the girl running the session was actively promoting her 'infertility cure' business. Apparently, she could get people pregnant is 3 months if we followed her very expensive plan... Mainly diet and supplements (if you look on this forum I suspect you'll find most info). She had no relevant qualifications on her website. I never went back to that session. 

I moved to another support group and have now discovered that the people running the sessions are also 'fertility experts.' Although they are not openly promoting their business, a large number of the women are seeing them for help. However, Mindfulness courses are being promoted but the person who is running the mindfulness course doesn't have the right qualifications and charges only a little less than the Mental Health Foundation promoted course. Real mindfulness courses are difficult and the one I attended had people having complete meltdowns (when you brain stops jumping from one subject to another - pain can appear). When it's your mind that is being healed, you don't want someone who doesn't know what to do should you start falling apart.  These people all managed to miraculously get pregnant after following 'their way.' 

Am I just being a little over the top in my concerns? Should I continue attending anyway because the women who I am meeting (the fertility challenged ones) are lovely? Should I say something to infertility UK?

I just feel a bit protective over really vulnerable people. It makes me soooo mad that we are such easy targets. 

xx


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## Hopefulshell (Mar 14, 2013)

Hi

I think that when we are so desperate for a baby and/or the answer as to why tx doesn't work, this puts us in a very vulnerable position. And sadly, there will always be unscrupulous people who will take advantage of such a situation. I must admit I am very sceptical of the 'so-called' professionals who claim to be able to 'fix' IF or offer the magic cure. Like many of us, I have tried alternative therapies and diets hoping this is the answer and learnt from experience that this isn't so!! Having said that, anything that can  help make you feel like you are being proactive or give you support during a tough time then this can only be a positive thing. For me, I use such things as a means of support whilst being sensible and realistic that at the end of the day only medical intervention will result in success for me personally. There are plenty of qualified professionals such as counsellors, accupuncturists, etc. so anyone you contact for help should be only too willing to prove they are qualified and experienced.

I think if you have befriended others from your group this in itself is a positive thing. Maybe you could continue the friendship outside the group if the sessions themselves aren't helping you personally? This way, you have the support without wasting your money or time on something that just isn't right for you. Everyone has their own ways of coping and only you know what yours is. There will sadly always be people who use others' bad fortune to make their own 

x


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Hi Dee-dee

I think if you are finding the support from the other members positive and have your eyes open to any ulterior motives by the people running the sessions then I would say keep going.  It is a sad fact of life that people always prey on those who are experiencing pain or difficulties in any areas of their lives.

Take care

Dory
xxx


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## bombsh3ll (Apr 19, 2012)

Hi deedee_spark,

I totally get your anger at unqualified people promoting "cures" for infertility, this type of predatory behaviour targeting vulnerable and desperate people makes my blood boil too!

I was "fortunate" to know from the outset that natural conception was anatomically impossible for me, yet I have still lost count of the number of recommendations I have had for diet/acupuncture/herbs/supplements/yoga/meditation/chanting etc.... & I really feel for those still searching for answers who will grasp onto anything that offers hope. 

I don't know about reporting them to INUK - trading standards might be a better bet if they are charging money and making claims that are not backed up by any scientific evidence.

B xxx


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## deedee_spark (Aug 6, 2014)

I had a look on Infertility UK and it seems almost all these sessions are run by people that have business interests associated with infertility.  I guess no one else would want to run these groups. I potentially would, but only after I had a baby. 

Since they are not actively promoting their business I will chose to ignore, after all, I don't have to use their services. Personally, I think a BBC/channel 4 type documentary is what is needed. The BBC beat up Mr T for ARGC a few years back and at least he is producing babies, so maybe they need to look at the people who aren't.

Since we start TTC, I realised what multimillion (maybe billion) pound industry this it. IVF is the biggest business... 

Thank you all for responding. At least I don't feel like the only one that sees red when a cure is promoted.

Hugs. xx


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