# RVH HRT Clinic



## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

Hi Ladies, I know from my personal mails that there are some other ladies from NI who have suffered the blow of premature ovarian failure. I finally got up the courage to go to the HRT clinic today in the maternity hospital (have needed to change treatment since June but hate going into maternity- genius location for those who can never have their own kids!) & when I got to the waiting room, I saw a sign that I had never seen before- 'Waiting room for HRT clinic & day obstetric patients'!!!! I then had to wait in a room full of pregnant couples. It has upset me so much that I have had to take the day off work & am sitting crying writing this. Who on earth could think that is OK- shall we take all the cancer patients to the morgue for their consultations??!!! 
Am so angry & hurt.


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## weeza82 (Dec 14, 2007)

Oh weejen     These things are never well thought out. My heart goes out to you. I know a bit about how you're feeling. i got the shock of my life at our first appointment in Craigavon where we had to wait with happy couples going for scans when I didn't expect it. It's not really the same situation as yours though. I hope you are feeling a bit steadier tomorrow. If you have to have a good cry this evening, then don't feel bad about it, let it all out.


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## holly01 (Feb 10, 2007)

i just wanted to echo weeza's post i think its so unapropiate where we have to go for our appointments and very very insensitive  
i also get soooo mad sitting among all the happy couples while we are just sitting in limbo and wondering will there every be a day we can smile like that  ...
have a damn gud cry and look after ureself


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## Cate1976 (Oct 29, 2007)

How insensitive, you would have thought that they'd realise that having the 2 in one waiting room isn't a good idea.  I echo what's been said about having a good cry.  Last Thursday, my senior leader told me that if I needed to cry then do so.


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## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

Thanks everyone. Have indeed had a good cry (& then some!). Will have a big mad swollen face tomorrow. Feel like I have had all the fight knocked out of me this year but think I'm gonna get myself psyched up to write the RVH hospital director a letter. I work there & am so disappointed with that lack of patient care. 
There is NO reason why the HRT clinic should even be in maternity, let alone sharing a waiting room with obs. I can now see why the ladies on the 'abroadies' thread who go overseas rave about their treatment there (especially on the emotional front) compared to the cold clinical treatment some have received on the NHS- grr, I'm fuming! 
I also posted on the UK early menopause support group (REALLY needed some cyberhugs 2day!) & many other lovely supportive ladies (like yourselves) shared their similar experiences. One said that she was so traumatised by her 'counselling' sessions sharing a waiting room with preggers women that she stopped attending.
Heard a good quote on an episode of ER I taped (lying on sofa under blanket today)- "to get 'out', you've gotta go 'through'" A lot of us are certainly going 'through' it, eh?
Thank you again for your support- your words of encouragement mean a lot. Will try to go asleep with nice thoughts about your support instead of today's rotten stuff now.
J xoxo


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## weeza82 (Dec 14, 2007)

Hiya weejen, 

Just wanted to check in and see how you are feeling today. You are certainly in the right place for hugs                           

You were just right to have a duvet day and even better to watch ER (love that show since forever). WHo said the quote? It is very appropriate. 

Hope you have a little bit more strength soon. If not, you know where to find our cyber-shoulders to cry on  

Weeza  xx


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## janners1 (Dec 30, 2007)

Weejen,

Sorry you have had such a terrible time - it is SOOO hard having to wait in a room full of pregnant women, I've had to do it a few times and it broke my heart a little bit. One time when I was waiting in Craigavon there were a couple of pregnant girls and one other girl. The non pregnant girl suddenly just burst into hysterical tears and ran out....I felt so bad because I am sure it was because she was having trouble conceiving and being made to sit with heavily pregnant women.

Writing a letter will make you feel better, as will having a good cry every now and again.


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## weeza82 (Dec 14, 2007)

Craigavon is awful. I have only been once so far, but I cried in the waiting room too. And then, our lovely wee doc was pg too!!! Bless her, she was soo aware of it and kept trying to hide it to be nice. She was so lovely.


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## Trishy (Jan 25, 2008)

I agree!  The layout is a disgrace.  How hard would it be to put a wall up the divide the room in two and then put a separate entrance so you never have to even walk past the other happy couples.  I said the same to DH the first time we went to RVH.  We had to walk through the waiting room then when I went to the loo the door had been written on by proud fathers with all the dates of birth and weight of their wee new borns.  

Surely there is no need whatsoever the department needs to be anywhere near maternity?  From what I can see it is a self sufficient department and we don't need to go near the maternity area for anything so why not have it in a different building altogether?  In the RVH the andrology lab for S/A is in another area so why can't fertility/HRT be there too?
        

Weejen - especially for you


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## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

Och Ladies, I am sooo touched by all of you taking time to write such thoughtful & supportive responses. It has really given me a boost. Thank you Weeza, Holly, Cate, Janners, & Trishy (hope I haven't left anyone out). 

I'm really sorry to hear that so many of you have had similar harrowing experiences. Sounds like Craigavon is particularly bad. Personally, I think that infertility investigations & treatment should be situated in a different place than those who are >3mths along & giving birth. We could go down the donor egg IVF route (currently pursuing intercountry adoption) & I would definitely NOT want to be lumped in with all the happy couples, especially if I was going through an unsuccessful cycle. 

Made it back into work today (patting myself on the back), despite big swollen gurny eyes. Had lunch with a pal who works in RVH admin & she is going to find out the best person to send a complaint to. My other friend said that I should send an anonymous letter into the Telegraph too, explaining the situation. 

I could have never imagined how hard this would be but your letters have been a real blessing. NI really is 'God's own country' with all you lovely considerate people in it.

J xoxo

PS- Meeting up with pals who adopted the most beautiful Ba I've ever seen from China this weekend & can't wait! Me & DH have even picked out a name for a wee Chinese Girl- Jasmine (fancied Jade but my mate already knicked it). D'ya think Jasmine is chavy? Trying to think of names with a Chinese influence?

PPS- Cate would you mind if I PMed you?


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## weeza82 (Dec 14, 2007)

Ooooh, I think Jasmine would be lovely for a wee chinese girl, just perfect. If you called her Britney or Shakira, then THAT would be chavvy.  (And yes, I do know of both a Britney and a Shakira)


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## Dahlia (Oct 29, 2007)

Hi weejen      

Glad you are feeling better today. I am outraged at their insensitivity- does these planners not have any clue at all  

Jasmine is a gorgeous name!

Take care of yourself,

Dahlia x


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## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

Thanks Weeza & Dahlia. Some of my sadness has turned into RAGE today! How dare they put a clinic for people like me in a waiting room for obstetrics! Have posted on the UK premature menopause board (& am going to post on the POF board here too) to ask if any one who attends the HRT clinic in the RVH would like to join in officially complaining along with me? This conditions affects 1 in 1000 people in their 20s (lucky me!) & 1 in 100 people in their 30s (high enough!), so a significant no. of people like me are being put through this unpleasant experience. Hopefully we can make it better for others receiving this devastating news.
Thanks, Jen xoxo


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## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

BTW- thanks for putting my mind at ease about the non-chaviness of Jasmine. Was laughing at Britney & Shakira (imagining a Belfast hardnut yelling them at some poor wee soul). In our day all the teenage Mums called their weeuns Kylie- ah, d'ya remember the gross bomber jackets with Kylie & Jason on the back!! If only life was as simple now as it was then- 'will you see my mate?' being the most stressful decision we had to ponder.
J xo


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## weeza82 (Dec 14, 2007)

Hi Weejen, 

I hope you get plenty of support for your complaint. I would certainly back you up, despite having never yet been near the RFC for an appointment, but I would anyway.

I used to indeed have a bomber jacket with Kylie and Jason to go with my jeans thathad Kylie on 1 thigh and Jason on another. (My mum knew the people who owned the T-shirt printing shop!!!)

Weeza


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## Cate1976 (Oct 29, 2007)

Weejen, glad you're feeling a bit better.  I'd love to hear from you via pm.  Duvet days or even duvet mornings/afternoons are great.  I've had a few lately.


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## Fionab (Aug 30, 2006)

Weejen

We had our first appointment at CAH and it was in the same waiting room, as it is such a big space you would think that they would even put some dividers or something like that in the middle.  

Jasmine is a lovely name, we have friends who called their wee girl Jasmine.

Fiona


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## CherryWoo (Nov 1, 2007)

Thanks Fiona. Sorry to hear that you have had a similar rotten time during your hospital visits. Saying a wee prayer for your 2WW.  
J xo


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## galaxy girl (Feb 12, 2008)

Hi Weejen,

One of the reasons we are going to Origin was due to that waiting room - I could hardly bear to walk through it never mind sit in it. I will also back up your complaint. You had no choice but to wait in that room and it's completely unacceptable that you should of had too. 

Hope your feeling a bit cheerier now. I also thing Jasmine is a gorgeous name, not chavvy at all. Have you been to info evenings for over sea's adoption? If so were do you go to get on the list? It's something I would be really interested in too if our treatment is unsuccessful.  .


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