# Meeting IPs - hope to be a surro mum



## clairekentuk (Mar 21, 2007)

Hi, Ive always dreamed of being a surrogate mum, but I dont know where to find IPs. I dont want to join a site necessarily as im not looking for financial gain and am not necessarily looking for those who have the money to join these sites.

Im just about to embark on concieving my final child thanks to a kind donor, after which my family will be complete. I would like to help someone else experience the joy of parenthood. Obviously, as I will be out of action for about 18 months from now, im not looking to commit to anything right away but since trust and a relationship with IPs is important to me, I am looking to start the ball rolling so to speak.
I realise it is illegal for IPs to advertise for a surrogate, or in my case vice versa so I presume there isnt a website where people are looking but I would like to chat with Ips and get to know them in preparation for the "right time" but with no commitment on either part and without getting anyones hopes up etc.

PS. If it makes a difference, im looking to do host surrogacy preferably but may consider straight.


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## Jennifer (Jul 22, 2004)

Hi Claire

You sound just like me ! I have had my babies through donor IVF and am now going to be a surrogate for a lovely couple that I met through Surrogacy UK.

SUK is an organisation that supports surrogates and IPs and they have regular meet ups which you might like to go along to. Their philosophy is friendship first, surrogacy second which was most important to me. Like you, trust and friendship are of the utmost importance.

SUK have many members and we all chat via MSN/email/meet ups etc and there is absolutely no commitment from either side unless a potential surrogate offers to help someone. It is strictly forbidden for an IP to ask a surrogate to help her.

They do not charge surrogates to join but there is a fee for IPs but its not for profit, it is purely to cover their costs which is fair.

I would recommend you join them as the support is fantastic - the website address is www.surrogacyuk.org
Here is a link to their forum... http://www.surrogacyuk.org/cgi-bin4/default.asp

I am sure you will enjoy meeting people through SUK and hopefully one day meet some friends that you could help 

BTW it is illegal for a surrogate to make money from surrogacy anyway 

Please feel free to PM me if you want to get in touch 

Jennifer xx

/links


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## clairekentuk (Mar 21, 2007)

Thanks for that. I feel a bit of a fraud joining SUK as I cannot be 100% sure I will be in a position to be a surro after Ive completed my family at this stage. I dont want to disappoint anyone.

I will probably take a look closer to the time unless they welcome people who are simply looking to become a surro. Ill have to take a look.


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## Jennifer (Jul 22, 2004)

Anyone is welcome to join the boards - absolutely no commitment is required.

They would rather have 10 people join and 9 drop out than have 1 person make a mistake 

I know you would be very welcome


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## Amandajb (Sep 6, 2007)

Hi there! 

I would certainly echo the previous post.  Although I am an independent host surro, I would certainly recommend SUK for support and the information on their website.  I am a member of their BB, and have found that the help and advice posted to be invaluable.  There was no pressure to either commit or become a member, which was reassuring.  There are people both there and here who are happy to offer non judgemental and straightforward advice.  

It took me nearly three years of searching for information and advice before I made the decision to go ahead.

Good luck whatever you decide doing.  The important thing is that you make the right decision for you.  Only by doing that, can you really commit to helping others.

Amandajb


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## Fruitbat24 (Nov 6, 2006)

Hi Claire

I think you will find all you need at SUK.  Just because you join the boards does not mean you are committed to surrogacy.  Like Amanda you should take your time and get your head around it all.  It does not matter if it takes you one month or 25 to come to your decision - it has to be right for you!

Good luck either way!


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## clairekentuk (Mar 21, 2007)

Thanks to all those who replied. I have now joined the SUK message boards and it looks like it will be very useful place to get more information about surrogacy and when the time is right, maybe meet IPs.


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## nostalgicsam (Jul 1, 2005)

Hi Claire,
What a wonderful thing to want to do for someone, SUK has some great advice and there is no need to join. As an independant surro, I don't I think you can read too much informationa and advice and chatting to others on boards is a great start. As an IP myself all I can say is that I looked and posted and still do on many sites even remotely related to surrogacy to find out more and to chat to other IP's and surrogates. I think the fact that you are looking into it long before you have completed your own family is a good thing.  

Best wishes for baby number 3.
Love
Sam
x


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## Fruitbat24 (Nov 6, 2006)

Hi


Good luck with your information gathering exercise and I hope the SUK boards help you fulfil your dreams.


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