# Enquiring about adoption



## dollyzx (May 7, 2003)

Hi everyone 
I've kept an eye on this thread , but have not posted before .
We are tentatively thinking about adoption but are unsure where to start . Do local authorities have info packs ? Do you just ring the council in your area or can you apply to any ? We are maybe moving so I wonder if it is sensible to contact that local authority ? 
I just feel totally daunted & after all the IVF it just seems another difficult process ! 
Thanks for any advice 
Dollyzx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

Hi Dollyzx

your local authority should be able to provide you with an info pack, if you are not moving far away your LA might still be able to take you on. only way to find out for sure is to give them a ring  

good luck  

pam xx


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi Dolly

Yes you should be able to just ring up your local authority and get an info pack.

Please try not to be too daunted by the process, I know it's a massive step.
I remember first looking into adoption and thinking "where do we start?" but really it was because we'd stepped out of our "comfort zone" of IVF, where we'd known everything about everything, and into the unknown.
Don't let it phase you, in our experience, adoption has been far less stressful than the IVF, and the end result says it all!

And we're going in for it again   so it can't be that bad, can it?

Best of luck, and let us know how you get on.
Any questions, don't be afraid to ask.

xx


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## Laine (Mar 23, 2002)

Hi Dolly,

There is no need to feel daunted by the adoption process. Once you get started, things soon fall into place.

Take a look at the British Association for Adoption & Fostering website....some good info on there...

http://www.baaf.org.uk/res/agencydb/index.shtml

Laine


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Dolly

Welcome.  I don't think there is anything else I can add as the girls have covered everything I would have said but just wanted to wish you luck for your new journey and good luck with moving (I still maintain that's the most stressful thing I've done despite IF)

Karen x


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## dollyzx (May 7, 2003)

Hi 
Thankyou so much for your replies , it does help . Think I will ring just for an info pack at this stage . I'm still on the donor waiting list , but feel we are unlikely to proceed with that due to my health - physical & emotional ! 
How do you finally close that door & move on in a positive way ? Have any of you had councelling & did it help ? Had a blip at the w/e & feeling low .
Thanks 
Love Dolly zx xxxxx


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## alex28 (Jul 29, 2004)

Hi Dolly

Hope you have made that call??

Re knowing when to move on.  I think you just know if that makes sense.  We decided about 2 months before our last go that it would be the last go and although it was so hard at the time to stick to that we know we 100% did the right thing.  Even though things are going to get hard over the next few months we know what a wonderful gift we will be getting at the end of it all.  Our lives at the moment are very stress free - no monies worries about we are going to afford the next cycle etc etc.

Not that this post has helped you much.  Im sure counselling will help and this is something positive to tell the SW when you do start going down that route.

Good luck!


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi again Dolly

Sorry you've been feeling low. Your emotions will be all over the place.
I personally found it tough to make that step away from IVF mainly because we'd always agreed to have that 3rd attempt. Our decision was taken from us by the clinic, although I knew in my hearts of hearts it was the right time to stop. We did put our names on the donor list, knowing that it might never come up, but secretly hoping it might as a back-up. We went ahead with the adoption, and to be honest now, if the call came that a donor egg was available for me, I think I'd turn them down now. I know where my life is now, and I can't imagine going back.
At the time, I remember feeling that adoption was a second best option, now I cannot imagine our lives any other way. I think that if we hadn't been through all that heartbreak and misery, then we wouldn't have our daughter now. This way has made our dreams come true completely. (And it can for you too!)

You will know within yourself when the time is right for you to move forward, and once you've made that step, you'll almost instantly feel relief.

I didn't have counselling for this, but have had it in the past and it could be of great benefit for you.

Good luck, and make that call.
xx


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## dollyzx (May 7, 2003)

Thanks for all the replies 
I think I'm going to go to the GP next week to try to sort some counselling out & then ring for an adoption info pack after that . I've got a lot going on over the next month but hope to make a decision either way after this .
Wishing you all luck on your adoption journey 
love Dolly zx xxxxxxxxx


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## Mummyof2 (Jul 31, 2003)

Dolly - nice to see you posting here - I wondered how you were getting on.  Sorry to hear that you have not been successful with the IVF      At least you know you tried everything.

To bring you up to date on me, you can see all my info to date from my signature.  IM if you need to know more.

Hugs to you.

Jenny


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