# Do you use contraception?



## joeyrella (May 13, 2009)

Sorry for the personal question, but does anyone use contraception? I am trying to come to terms with never having another baby, and feel like taking contraception and there being no chance of a pregnancy would force baby making from my mind. I would love to have another baby, so its not like I actually want the contraceptive effect but I was wondering if it would work in taking my focus off wondering every month whether I could be pregnant naturally? We've spent so long being obsessed with all things fertility that it would be lovely to be able to move on and enjoy what we are lucky enough to have. Or do you think it would be ridiculous to think I wouldn't be thinking about babies 24/7 even if I was using contraception? Any experiences gratefully received.


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## Guest (Apr 14, 2011)

We don't.

I did try going back on the Pill but was a hormonal disaster, we did think about condoms, but.....so we just don't bother.  

Our journey has been slightly different as I never conceived but became a Mum through adoption - we have unexplained IF.  Things have got easier over the years, but I do still wonder some months if this is the month, but I know in my head its over now as I'm now 42 and after 14ish years, the chance are pretty non-existent.  

HTH?

Bop


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## mazv (Jul 31, 2006)

Haven't used any in 9 years now   I'm not planning on using any either, seems kind of pointless to me as would just be taking something that doesn't work anyway (iykwim) and would get me even more hormonal than I am   I can see the logic though in thinking that if you do use some then you are actively not ttc and perhaps less likely to dwell on the what if's   To be honest though I suspect you'd still dwell on it if deep down it is still a hope that you harbour   

I'm trying to look on it as another part of the IF journey that will hopefully lead me to the point of acceptance one day (still struggling with it just now) but hoping it gets easier with time.

Hope your decision helps you either way whatever you decide   
Maz x


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## kara76 (Dec 14, 2004)

Hiya hun I have no tubes yet if my af is late I too wonder if the impossible could happen! Very silly as its near impossible but near impossible is enough to make me wonder.

I think even with time is a hard thing to come to terms with. Atm I'm very much at terms with it but things change over days and weeks. Big hugs


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## KP (Apr 27, 2004)

hi  we don't use anything either.  We did discuss it recently and decided we wouldn't even though our family is complete.  I think for both of us the teeny chance of a natural still lurks!


Annette


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## katedoll (Jun 3, 2007)

Hiya
I see we have similiar aged toddlers.  I wonder if you are finding, like me, that alot of the new friends I have made through my daughter are now announcing no. 2 child, so there is 2 yrs between them ......  and a few people have started asking us if we are ttc again - little do they know.  We haven't used contraception since 2004 when we first started ttc, and I'm not going to use any now.  I think I quite like the maybe this month will be the one, and I would really be upset with myself if we didn't have that 'opportunity'.  If it is taking over your life though I can see why contraception may be sensible from a psychological rather than physical point of view.  Have you taken the pill before ... if you find it good for you (ie not hormonal) not take it for 6 months and see how you feel?  I found though when I've been on the pill, it takes me a good 6 months to get regular cycles again.  My view would be not to take any contraception and always have that chance, but I can see it isn't for everyone.  xxxx  ps bet your little boy is the cutest age now .... into everything!


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## beckyyou (Oct 25, 2009)

Hello 
i dont use contracepton and we have disgussed it and wont, but always said if i was 2 have another it would be before my ds is 2 so i spose i might when he is 2 as then i will adapt, and not want any as it would be another big gap (well 4yrs between each child ds 8 dd 4 and ds 8months) and my oldest will want to do stuff the youngest cant. But I dont know if i could use contraceptive as the chance is so slim and always a what if
becky


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## Debbienick (Feb 25, 2011)

Hi there Joeyrella, not sure if you will see this post as the last reply was quite I while back but it struck a cord with me as I am just considering the same. We just lost our second little bean and at this moment in time I dont think I could go through the potential loss a third time (even though I know there is a chance I could get pregnant again and there is every chance it could be fine this time). I wondered what decision you came to as I am probably not feeling very logical/sane at the moment....I do feel though that if I went back on contraception then I take away that chance of ending a third pregnancy in a hospital theatre and will never have to go through another scan again where they give you the "bad news". I dont know what to do and my DH has said lets not make any rash decisions but I cant imagine ever feeling different at the moment and contraception would definitely bring that "closure" because as much as I try to put it to the bck of my mind and say if it happens it happens I know that will never be the case while there is still a chance....


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## joeyrella (May 13, 2009)

Sorry Debbie, I didn't see this until today.  Sorry to hear about your loss    how are you feeling now?  I had a difficult birth and was adamant I would never be doing it again, but that turned out to be a knee jerk reaction.  I think maybe your DH is right and don't rush into anything based upon your initial reaction.

As for contraception, it came to it and I just couldn't do it.  On the other hand we're not actually doing the deed at the moment either!  I am still having days where I think I might want to try again and I don't want to take anything that might harm our chances if one day I wake up and have made up my mind definitively.  I'd love to be able to say I never want to try to get pregnant again, my heart can't agree with my head though, yet......


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## Debbienick (Feb 25, 2011)

Hi Joeyrella, thanks so much for your reply. Yes, I wont make any rash decisions and even if we do decide to go that route it wont be anything irreversible.....I am feeling abit better now. I dont think the sudden drop in hormone levels help - I was very tearful for the first week and even now feel like I am getting PMT from hell. Hopefully that will die down soon and I will be able to think on a more rational level!
I am with you that I would love to be totally 100% over this and moved on as I think I would actually be a happier person for it but it aint that easy is it!! You cant help what you want on an emotional level whatever your head tries to tell you....


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

Great thread, we have never used any contraception in 20 years, so I am not about to start now, and declined at my post natal appointment 
however having got POF aged 19 I was offered HRT in my early 30's for symtom control 
but declined to continue with tx/ttc naturally 
I am however now struggling to function with a toddler and the menopause symptoms
and having talked to a nurse at my work I may have HRT and need the pill or depo or coil alongside it  . . .
I see the GP Thursday *gulp*


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