# Advice about intros



## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Am looking for some advice about intros and whether people would recommend time off beforehand. Finish work on the Friday, will probably have to do some work over the weekend then intros start on the Monday. Is that silly? Should I have time before? The problem is that I work in a school and only get SAP. If I finish before the Easter hols I will lose pay for during the hols. I meet my beautiful pink on the first day of the Easter hols.Sorry for rambling but I'm not sure what to do xx


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## Loopylou29 (Mar 4, 2013)

I've done intros twice and first time I had 2 days between finishing work and starting intros. Second time around I had nearly 2 weeks off before intros.
I wish I'd had more time off beforehand on the first set. They are exhausting and like many people do I fell ill during them. Even if its just a few days take them and get as much sleep/rest as you can. Intros are tough because of all the emotions and travelling.
Can you not challenge your employer over only paying SAP. Many people have done and had their adoption pay matched to maternity.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

That's good to know- thanks. I just want everything to be perfect and feel that it won't be if I am shattered to begin with. Hope my boss understands. Have tried challenging my employer but had no joy. I am a teacher and the LA provides adoption pay in line with mat pay for every employee apart from teachers! It's crazy and my sw is trying her hardest and my little pink`s sw has sent me a form for financial assessment. If I have time off before I will lose 3 weeks pay but it might be worth it. Not sure what to do xx


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## tigerbabe (May 26, 2011)

Tilly - I'm glad you have brought this up as I , like you, work in a school although I'm a teaching assistant and although not yet at this stage it would be interesting to find out what's best to do I know I can take 14 days prior to adoption leave for intros and that my employer can either opt for sap and op or just one if you do not return after leave has finished


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

Tillywhit, that's shocking. I'm a teacher but luckily i had the same as mat. We started intros in the middle of half term but i put the first day  back after the hols as day 1 of my leave. That way i Got paid. I'm going back after the Easter hols and I feel sick every time I think about it


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

If I was getting the same a mat I think that I would take the week before the Easter holidays. It's such a lot of money to lose but only having 2 days between finishing work and intros worries me. Maybe I am worrying over nothing xx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

from reading your post do you mean women on maternity get enhanced maternity pay or do they get the statutory only too? if the only extra they get is the six weeks at 90% you may struggle to get this as that's set bu the government. but if they get anything on top of this, say half pay for a period of months, dont give up on challenging it.

i work for the police and challenged our policy. it took months admittedly but it got changed in the end. they simply could not justify giving a better package to women on maternity than adoption leave. if you search my posts i have posted about this before and what i said etc.

obviously the only downside if you do have to go back to work or you have to pay it back


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## MummyElf (Apr 11, 2013)

I used my holiday to have a couple of weeks off before with our daughter intros and I'm really glad I did. It gave me lots of time to nest, batch cook and relax - I needed to shake off my job which was very stressful before I started my new life as a mummy. As our son was placed just 4 months later, I was (and still am,just) on adoption leave for my daughter but had it not been that way I still would have wanted a week to breathe and get ready.

I'd probably attempt to challenge it in your position, a week would be nice to prepare and intros are just about the most intense, exhausting experience ever so having your batteries fully charged will help you a lot!x


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Women on mat leave get 90% for so long then 50% for a time. I really don't understand how adoption pay can be seen differently.  Going to keep on trying but not sure what else to do.
Think I might ask if I could take the week unpaid but then still be paid for the Easter holidays. It's worth a try... xx


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## Wyxie (Apr 10, 2013)

I had just over 2 weeks with our daughter, and I really did need it.  Apart from anything else, the nesting time made the imminent arrival feel more real, much more real, and I think without that I would have really struggled to suddenly transition to having a child and introductions, which are incredibly tiring and emotional for everyone.  I also had a really tiring and demanding job just prior to going on leave, and the downtime really did help.

I would also recommend challenging your employer's policy.  If they offer an enhanced maternity package, they may well be pushed into matching it for adoption, as offering it for one and not the other can be argued to be discriminatory.  

All the best,

Wyxie xx


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

I took matching panel day off, then worked until the day before intros started. It was manic and I certainly won't be doing that the next time around. In a way it's good to be occupied but if your job is stressful you need time off!
I'm aiming to start my leave from matching panel date next time but as I don't intend to return to work afterwards.
We get the same package as Maternity leave in my workplace -90% wks 1-6, 50% wks 7-25 then SAP wks 26-39, then nothing for wks 40-52.
I wanted to go on just SAP last time but they wouldn't do it. As I intended to return it wasn't an issue however this time I'm not returning so we'll see how it goes.


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

Arrows said:


> I wanted to go on just SAP last time but they wouldn't do it. As I intended to return it wasn't an issue however this time I'm not returning so we'll see how it goes.


that's surprising. i was told i could elect to go on SAP and then if i went back get the enhanced amount as a lump sum. i didn't even know you could do that tbh, but as my employer offers it i assumed it must be a standard thing!


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

If only my employers saw adoption as important as pregnancy. Been advised by my union to write to then head of HE asking for the maternity package to be extended to me so that we can try to do something when I get a refusal. 
I think you're right Wyxie, I do see it as being discriminated against. A colleague at work is pregnant and will get mat pay, I really don't see the difference xx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

my union, HR and 'employee relations' were all a colossal waste of time, i ended up emailing our chief constable, and then things started happening. find your equivilant and contact him or her.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Thanks Katie, that's a good idea. Have tried my local MP but that didn't work either. Will keep on trying, I feel that a bit of time before intros will help loads but need support to do that xx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

Tilly, this is the reply I gave when this question was brought up before. HTH. 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=304026.msg5400867#msg5400867


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Thank you so much for that Katie. Going to draft a letter tomorrow to the head of HE and anyone else I can think of. If it doesn't help it won't hurt xx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

surprisingly the arguement that had the most sway was that of other forces (especially neighbouring ones) offering equal maternity/adoption T&Cs. i googled all the english and welsh forces and about two thirds had their HR policies online. i also googled comparible occupations like the fire brigade, ambulance service, public sector workers like teachers, council staff. 

i believe in a year or so it might be coming law anyway, it may be worth pointing out to them they may want to be ahead of the game a bit. 

it really grinds my gears this isn't automatic at the moment though, its not millions of people go off on AL every year. my force has about 10-11,000 staff/officers, i asked how many had gone off on AL and told i couldn't be told for data protection   but someone in HR let it slip i was the first in about ten months. but as the chief inspector who championed me said, it doesn't matter if 100 people went off on AL every week, it still should be equal.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

I agree. I really do not understand why adopters are even as needing less support. There should be no difference. My sense is working with a couple who live in a nearby authority and they receive equivalent to mat pay as did my colleague at work who adopted through another nearby authority. Some people are so short-sighted, they can't see the benefits of helping adopters on their journey xx


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## Macgyver (Oct 27, 2008)

Tilly


I think adoption leave pay depends on your company policy too. My company treat adoption the same as maternity pay. So I guess I am very lucky.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

I think that it definitely does. One of the girls from prep group gets full pay for 6 months. If only local councils were so understanding xx


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## newmum (Jan 22, 2011)

I'm very luck I get 6 months full pay then 3 months sap.

I used hols for intros


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Even a couple of months of full pay would make a huge difference. Have written a letter to send to HR so will see what happens xx


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

Our was equal to map but I still only got 4 weeks at full. It's amazing how quickly the weeks fly by - you are on nothing before you know it!! Still, worth every penniless minute


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Our mat pay isn't great but better than £136 per week for the entire time.  Definitely going to take the time off, have waited such a long time for her xx


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

Make sure you also remember to claim child benefit and working tax credit from the date of placement.


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

Good point arrows, you can def get it back dated because we did but I think there is a 3 month limit on how far back you can go. You will need lo birth certificate for this. We were given that at the planning meeting which was day 1 of intros.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Will definitely do that. My lo`s sw is also looking into some financial support and I have filled a financial assessment form. Here's hoping .... xx


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## sass30 (Apr 16, 2011)

I must say we are lucky as i get full pay for 6 months same as they offer mat leave in my work place. Its contractual adoption pay then 26 weeks at sap then nothing. I can only afford to take 6 months but will have leave and p&p days to take so should boost me a little. I would definatly challenge it, i challenged time off for prep and meetings.  Pregnant woman has to go see midwife ect and we have to have home study, so i argued this and got special leave. So far work have been very generous and accomodating.


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## Tillywhitt (Feb 19, 2014)

Have managed to get time off for meetings which has been ok. Just hoping that something can be sorted. Want to spend as long as I can afford at home with my lo xx


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

I really hope your dreams come true Sass.
Have they given you a timeframe in which to expect a response? Took ages for us and that was through profile matching on the national database rather than activity day.

We've been told once we're approved that it would be good to go to an activity day too as that way our son can also meet potential LOs -just hope no-one mistakes him for being available! He tends to charm everybody.


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