# Poor Responder....part 20



## Rachel (Mar 10, 2004)

New home  

Lots of love, luck and happy chatting to you all    

Rachel x


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Thanks Rachel- how are you?


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Morning Beach! xx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Hiya- are you workign today?


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Yea this morning finish about half two! Have you got the day off? xxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Yes- back Monday, so am currently cleaning and doing jobs in the house and getting ready to go out, got a list as long as my arm to work through. x


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Wish you could clean our house Beach - its an embarassing state!  
Morning Merse  
Off for shower now then madwife appt  
NW


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Morning! I'd love to be at home. Sigh. The poor dogs didn't get a walk last night as it was so dark and wet - sick of spending all the dry daylight hours in this box.

Moan moan, whinge whinge....

Good luck with the madwife, Nicks! Is she coming to your house?

xxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

No - went to surgery Mirra - never have to wait as long as you do for GP. All fine though - checked my blood tests and wee etc and listened to HB. had to own up to having a doppler!  
Going to make parsnip soup now for lunch.  
Might do some housework later but so much needs doing I don't know where to start!  
NW


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## Swinny (Jul 10, 2007)

Merse – Well done on weight loss chick. I have totally fallen off the wagon and haven’t been weighed for about 6 weeks. I have gone back to the gym though so hopefully that will be helping me maintain. 

Gabs – I’m with you, I’ll be misbehaving until Christmas and then dieting again afterwards. Got loads of do’s in the next few weeks and then my birthday and then Christmas, can’t do the being good thing until after all of that!!

I am not entirely sure when I’ll start down regging, as I’ve never been on the LP before. But from what I can glean, if I get the go ahead on Monday from the consultant then I will probs start down regging on the 8th. 

On the DHEA note, I am currently taking 50mg each day. I’ve never had my testosterone tested though, I maybe should??

Pin – Good luck honey  

Nicks – Parsnip soup yummmmm!!! I have just been bad and had chips and gravy from our canteen and it was lovely.
Thanks for your re-assurance the other day; I really do want to start in December even if it means a crap Christmas. Fingers crossed hey!!
Hope you and bump are doing well. 

Mirra – Hope you’re ok. How’s bump? 

Laura – How’s our PUPO lady?? 

Inc – Did you get chance to sit DH down and talk? Its hard isn’t it, my DH doesn’t talk to me about it. He was so insensitive the other day that he had the bl**dy cheek to ask if he had to attend Monday’s consultants appointment. I snapped his head off of course. Men aren’t good at talking about it all. 

Beach – Anything fancy for tea tonight?? Whilst you were having your Parmentier Potatoes, I was having Surf and Turf in town and then we went to the Comedy Club. Check me out with a social life!

Roozie – Hope you’re ok and our little tots are safe & sound. We’re all thinking about you.   

Hello to anybody else that I’ve missed

Sarah xxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Hello folks, 

Hope you are all welll  Got up at 13 hrs ... can't believe it... NOt much time.  Working tomorrow...so lessons preps...

Mir - what's R&R?  

Laura - how is Tilly today?    

Swinney  - I think long protocols are better for quality.... Was looking at your signature.... I think both I and dh are exhausted...although both are still taking the vits and clinging to hope...

I think I will ring for some counselling privately as I think I need to get some support and get myself in a better frame of mind for Jan... 

Nick - how many wks are you now?  

Pin - any news?  

Love you all....


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Gotta be quick as at work - Rest & Relaxation Inc!

Hi sarah - what comedians did you see? Were they good?

xxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Quick hello, going back out now for pedicure so will be back later on x


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls finished work for the day thank goodness!! Still feel tearfull today am hoping its PMT making me feel worse! Gonna take my little boy out for a walk that usually helps me feel better!
Lol to all xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Merse- I feel the same, just back from pedicure and my therapist told me she's pg...really pleased but sad too.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Do you think the whole bloody world is pregnant apart from us? Or does it just feel that way?   xxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Think everyone is.....don't mean to sound like I'm not happy for her but she's telling everyone and she's only 4 weeks....she even knows about my tx and I'm not saying I wouldn't want to be told but you know what I mean


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

It sounds like she's had a battle herself, if she's telling people at only four weeks? People don't usually know at four weeks - more like 6, 8 or even 12 weeks. 

I was worried I told everyone before 12 weeks, but only because everyone knew I was going for tx and asked. Don't think I could keep it a secret tho, I'm not what you'd call a slim bint.

I'm still having horrors imagining telling everyone if it goes wrong.

What's your next step, Karen? When do you get your free cycle?
Fricking heck though - you go for a pampering and get bludgeoned about the head with someone's 'happy news' even there - you'd think they'd give it a rest, wouldn't you?

Merse - are you still managing to keep your head above water? It's bloody difficult trying to get straight after everything that's happened. The first I felt a bit normal again was when I got to Turkey, and I think that was a lot to do with being with my Jinemed mate and feeling like we were there on holiday.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Mir- she's lovely but she one's of those people who tell everything to everyone adn then a week later everything's changed etc...

We'll hopefully take our free cycle March/April when we get back from our hols as don't want to do it before then go away just incase something happened.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Agh, one of those! I guess doing pedicures you want something to talk about. it's why I don't have beauty treatments ever - I hate making conversation with these bimbettes!

Nice one - Christmas, then a holiday, then tx - perfect timing I reckon.

xxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Hope so, we should come back all relaxed before we gte back on the treadmill of scans, injections and that wonderful gift of a baby.....


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

I'm still at work but just thought I'd post and say hello.  My boobs are not sire and I'm getting AF aches.  Feel so sad.  I know I wasn't expecting it to work but you still get your hopes up.



I think you know if its worked and it hasn't.  Feel like going and getting drunk.  Tim out at the gym hence why I though I may as well just work late. 

Sorry for me post.


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Laura - it aint' over yet... When are you testing?  And symptoms are the same really...


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- you've got 7 more days yet to test and as Inc says people who are pg often get the same symptoms as AF so hang in their girl and go home put feet up and get a healthy takeway, don;t go overdoing it at the gym x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I'm still getting AF aches now Laura, so don't despair. The sore boobs come and go for a bit - you'll feel them again, really you will. A couple of times I thought the soreness had gone completely, but I still had a heavy feeling when I took my clothes off for a bath.

Come on, Tilly's the best embie you've ever had - I DEFY her not to stick.  

xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Thanks girls.  I'm getting a headache now... think thats AF or preg hormones??!   Just know this is what happened last time.

Think your right I may pick up a ****** on my way home (food not man!)


X


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- just made me laugh with your joke....go and pamper yourself and play scrabble with us x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I just looked at my diary, and I got really strong AF pains on day 9DPO - the same day as you're on now.

It CAN work.

Is your belly hot? Are you hot at night at all? Not that any of these things mean anything, but you never know.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Laura the symptoms are the same for AF and pregnancy been pregnant twice and totally thought AF was on her way both times!!!
Had a terrible day today worst one for a while I know its AF hormones but doesn't make it easier! Am hoping it holds off till after week end as going to Brighton with my friends so don't want to be in pain!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Evening Ladies...

Laura - Just wanted to say that there was someone the other day who had headaches and she got a BFP......her friend who was testing also had headaches and she got a BFP too.....it aint over till the mouthwash is out, fat lady hasnt even started the chorus yet......and Ive got a feeling in me water matey.......just wait and see.......  

How is everyone this evening then?


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Another game of scrab each Gab? Merse?  You start if you want a game - get the double points?

I'm fine Gab - knackered, but only one more early start before i sleep like a god.

Get lots of vodka down you this weekend Merse - deadens any pain!

xxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

Thanks girls for your positivity. Although its not working on me.    Just same thinkg happened last cycle, boobs not sure Af pains but cyclogest stopped it til test day.  

I do really have AF pains and this is when they would usually start for me, just little bit of backache and pain a few days before.

Well Tim is out at the gym (again) and so I've put a huge pizza in the oven and gonna stuff my face with that.  And then scrab.

I tried to talk to Tim about our next plan explaining it helps me to have a plan B but he wouldn't.  

XX


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Dont need to think about Plan B sweetie...think positive...


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I needed to have a Plan B too Laura - it kept me sane, though Pete wouldn't talk about it either.

Mine was to move to Scotland or build our own house, not for any more tx though.

It does safeguard against falling through the floor if it's negative, was my thinking.. 

So, when are you starting to test? How many tests have you got?

xxxxxxxxxxx


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Get scrabbing girls!!
Any news from Pin?
xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I'm trying to! It's soooo daaaaarn slooooow.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I've just texted Pin that we are all thinking of her... she may be too busy to rply!

Yeah not sure what we will do next.

Been reading through some 2ww diaries.  Some do say Af pain and get BFP but these are quite bad.  

As for testing I have one early and 2 normal.  Not sure when to test, if I continue to feel neg then I will test tue as thats 14 dpo but if symptoms pick up then I may test earleir with mt early test.  Am working all week so gonna have to test before I go anyway won't be able to make it the weekend.  

But I have been preg and I really don't think its worked.  I feel like last time when I had BFN.  

I guess we do have a plan B as we are going on a nice holiday in Jan for 2 weeks we are thinking of sri lanka... anyone been?

Sorry my head can't deal with personals today!  

Off for a bath... Mirr you coming?


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I've been for mine! Sorry, left the water a bit murky.

Well I hope the symptoms pick back up and you have a Plan B...FP. What the early one? And the normals? They all seemed to say the same thing to me - different levels of accuracy before 14DPO, but about the same?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura     don't give up on us yet babes

Mir-do you share a bath


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Went to Bentota Beach in sri lanka Laura....was very nice with its own resident elephant...although not a lot to do outside the hotel...it just seemed a bit dodgey if you know what i mean..but the people are lovely...x


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- what about Maldives?


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Just noticed that we tend to bathe about the same time, K!  

Scrab is driving me bats - so slow! I have nearly 20 games on the go, so slow is not good.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Maldives looks like paradise in the travel books doesnt it?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Gab- we've been twice now and I love it, would go back every year.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

It takes forever to load a game....


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Very nice....what island do you go to then?....is it quite reasonable priced then?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Gab- we've been to an island called Kuredu both times x


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Sorry girlies....too tired for personals.....    to everyone.....long day again tomorrow so...going to retire.....

Pin...thinking of you sweetheart.....   

Nite, Nite, girlies...catch up tomorrow.....xxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

sounds like you have found yr little bit of paradise ......Thats how we feel about Australia...xxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Gab- would love to go to oz, night x


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Could talk about Oz all night sweetie...youve got to go there...it is wonderful...the people are lovely too....we didnt book anywhere we just flew out there and booked motels as we travelled around it was great fun....x....the most expensive thing was the flight once you are there it is really cheap...xxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Evening girls  
I'm off to bed soon too.
LB - don't give up until you know one way or the other. For some AF pains are a really good sign   I'm still getting occasional twinges.
Hope Pin is getting on OK  
Love to all
Nicks


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

Hi all.  I'm a new member to this site & have just had my 4th failed atempt at ICSI.  The doctors have told me I have poor ovarian reserve and I wandered if anyone could give me some advise please on what else I could try to hopefully get pregnant.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Loubella- hi and welcome to Team PR, I can't give you any info about OR but I'm sure someone can help.  Just off to bed as totally shattered but didn't want to go without saying hello  x


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I'm back.

Loubella - Welcome!  There are so many girls on here with lots of adive.  But we need details!!  Tell about your cycles and drugs and we will give you a free consult!!    A few of us are on DHEA and we have a few success stories on here so hang in there!!

Anyway I'm off to do my botty bomb and then to bed.

Thank Crunchie its Friday tomorrow, I'm running a workshop in the after noon and hoping that I should be finished by 3-4ish!  

Yeah the weekend... I'm so looking forward to a long lay in bed sat.

XXXXX


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## odette (Nov 3, 2006)

Previous post from Miranda:
Odette - where do you keep disappearing to? Have you got a life? They're frowned on you know, lives - unless you invite us all along!

Ha! Ha! Ha! - Do I have a life - no I don't - I never have the time to post any messages.
I don't know how you ladies do it.  As you can see from the time I'm posting, this is the only chance I get to check the postings. I read the posts but...........- I'm too busy 


OK what keeps me from you lovely ladies - I'm working my butt off at my school.
It's nearing the end of term and I have to organise costumes for our end of term show plus get props, make the set, organise reports etc etc and I have to do it all on my own. It's non-stop for me and I can't wait until the Christmas break.  I'll be able to put my feet up. have a glass of vino and catch up on you girls 

Miranda - What the hell is SCRAB! .   Say hello to Tilly for me 

Laura -   All you need is faith honey. Hold on!  It ain't over till it's over.

Loubella - Welcone to the site. Can't help you there - I've having one more go with my eggs and then I'm going to egg doner.  Everyone's journey is different - hope you get answers.

Gabrielle, Nicki, Beachgirl, Pin, Merse   How are you all keeping?

I TELL A LIE - I'VE NOT BEEN TO BUSY TO0 WATCH CELEB - I'M BEEN HOOKED! 

Love Odettexxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Morning Odette

I'm fine thank you, had a busy morning so far and now having 5 mins x


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## ☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ © (Jan 13, 2005)

gabrielle said:


> Could talk about Oz all night sweetie...youve got to go there...it is wonderful...*the people are lovely too*....we didnt book anywhere we just flew out there and booked motels as we travelled around it was great fun....x....the most expensive thing was the flight once you are there it is really cheap...xxx


Sorry to gatecrash but had to say I completely agree with gabrielle....my stepdads an Aussie so I'm biased !! Australia is an amazing country...and Sydney is one of the most beautiful cities...I've lived/worked there when my parents lived there for a while...they now live in New Zealand, which is another stunning country (off to see them in Feb/Mar next year as not seen them for 3 & half years...can't wait !  ...a lovely break before we start IVF again in March )

Love, luck & sticky vibes
Natasha xx


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

Hello and thankyou for welcoming me to this site.  
Laurab you mentioned a few of you are on DHEA and I'm not sure what that is.  Also I can give you details about my last cycles but I'm not sure what info you'll need.  I was on buserelin to shut me down always takes 3 1/2 weeks and and the first time I had the ICSI I was on 2 amps of menopur daily, then 4, then 6 and finally 8.  
Hope this helps please feel free to ask if not.  I just feel as though I've ran out of roads to go down now and hopefully someone can open some more doors.  
Thankyou everybody.


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## ☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ © (Jan 13, 2005)

[alert]Members are reminded that FF does not condone self medicating[/alert]

DHEA is a steroid hormone and is not readily available in the UK ie you can not buy it over the counter, nor can it be prescribed.

For this reason, please discuss taking this with your consultant before self administering.

Good luck
Natasha


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## roozie (Mar 25, 2007)

finally got a chance to get back on ff. Joel had to hijack PC for the bakery... office one was having problems
.
Just a quick hello for now anyway - hope everyone's keeping ok anyway, just had a quick scan of all your goss.

LB, how's Tills?  It's way too early to start having negative thoughts about this cycle. It's going to work hun', ok?  Stuff those silly symptons, remember i was 100% convinced (i'd have gambled our house on it, i was that sure) about my results after GIFT......PMA from now on please. (only i'm allowed to be Queen of doom and gloom!!)

Any news of Pin yet? Was she being induced yesterday..lost track a bit.

Merse, how's your PMA going? Still with you i hope hun'. Don't let it go.... you've been doing so brilliantly. Hope the endo pains aren't too painful at the mo....... do you get them at random times or does it only tend to be when the witch is visiting?

NW and Mir, hope both bumps are well. Mir, your IBS pains any better now..? Hope so. Enjoy your lovely lie in tomorrow.... i don't know how you manage to haul yourself up at 5.30am, must be so grim....i used to think 7.30 was unbearable! When are your next scans both of you - NW, you must be awaiting the 20 wk anomaly scan now.. will you go willy hunting?

Hiya Gabs, Beach, Em, Odette, and welcome Loubella. Loubella, has your clinic ever discussed GIFT with you, provided you have no major MF issues and your tubes are ok?? Like all of us here i have low reserve and my clinic reckoned IVF only carried a v low chance of working for us, whereas GIFT would increase the odds to about 10 or 15% - it got me preganant (with triplets) anyway.Not all places do it, considered quite old fashioned and is more invasive but still maybe worth enquiring..??

Off to lie donw for a bit and take the weight off. No real developments here, still watching and waiting, feeling v paranoid about any twinges or tightenings. Juat another trip to hospital yesterday after i called them to say i was getting more breathless than previously, so was told to come in and get checked over again... thought my anaemia may have been getting worse. Anyway, 5 hours later, bloods, scans and funny clips on end of fingers showed all is ok. Felt a bit of a fool but it's juts really hard not to worry... 

Waffled way too much, sorry girls. Can someone tell me how to scrab later? Going a bit stir crazy today.

Rooz xx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Hi Rooz - glad all OK   That'll be the pulse oximeter on your finger measuring your oxygen! Yes I'm going to be willy hunting just before xmas - having another private scan as 20 weeks is xmas week and assumed NHS appt would be delayed. Not heard anything yet. You 24 weeks now?  
Louber -   Sorry about your cycles. what is your FSH? Have you had any other tests such as inhibin B or AMH? I know you didn't get many eggs but what kind of embryo quality are you getting? - how many cells on which day? I'm sure there is still hope for you as you are very young so hopefully still have some good eggs, although maybe not so many.
hi Odette - how is life now after hydro op?   Looking forward to xmas and school hols? 
I've gone and got DH's cold now so we both feel sh*te  
Had to sit in a meeting this am with trousers too tight so not very happy. Have matty ones but no baggy tops yet so not a great look - skin tight jumper with loads of gathered and elasticated material underneath !  
3 poos today Mir and Emma - one extreme to the other!   
LB - hope you are OK. AF pains still there? Its implantation   Any news from Pinster?
chat later
Takeaway curry for tea methinks  
NW


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi all,

I'm home and its friday and its pay day!!!  

No news from Pin yet!  I exted her yesterday I will post as soon as I hear owt or text one of you girls if I'm not at the comp.

Lou - Nicks has given you a start on the things you need to look at, but sounds like you have been on the long protocol each time?  On here (The PR's) we are nearly all using the short protocol where you don't down reg for 3 weeks.  You just start injections on day 2/3 of AF and take burselin to stop you ovulating.  Down regging can make it hard for your ovaries to get started again.  Think menopur is prob the best for us but this can be combined with clomid I think, one of the others will help you.  DHEA is a supplement that a few of us are taking. Most of the abroad clinics agree with it and the more forward thinking places like AGRC and LIster say it does not hard, but I got my first Perfect embie after taking it for a few months and so did Nicks and Mirr (who are both now preg).  Whats your eggs like? Lining?  

Rooz - Yeah scrab! We will keep you busy!  

Nicks - Wow you are getting really pregnant now!!!  

Mirra - Hows you? Think I'll get the bathwater first toniht!!  

Merse  - How you doing today? Got some fun plans for the weekend?

Gab, Odette, Linz, Beach, and whoever I've forgotten (al ways someone!) - Hello!


XXX


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Hiya- just back froma  marathon shop, now got to cram it all in cuprboards and on wine racks x


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls
Rooz glad you are keeping well 
Laura I'm off to Brighton with my friends tom till Sunday so looking forward to that,how about you any plans?
Beach well done on shop!
Nicks not long now till next scan!
Well I had a go at my Mum today, so feeling bad about it but I haven't seen my sis since my last IVF started to go wrong all I've had is a few emails (she lives about 10mins from me!). My Mum says that my sis feels that I don't care about her or her family as I haven't seen her And she doesn't want to come round as she is pregnant! Well forgive me for being selfish and please be honest if you think I am, but who's having the worst time here and who needs support Also my mum tells me what my sis says to her but won't tell her anything I say as she doesn't want to upset her as shes pregnant! I'm feeling this is a bit unfair as this is always the case as my sis has a terrible temper so nobody wants to upset her! Surely the fact that I've just been told I can't have children would mean I would like some support and not to be upset?? Please let me know your thoughts as I've got PMT and very emotional so may not be thinking clearly! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Merse- know exactly what you mean   it's similar in my family although my sister doesn't know about tx as not that close but it's always me who has to do the running, take pressies, see at xmas etc, they never come to us.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

I'm so hurt that she hasn't even bothered to phone and say sorry that you can't have children, but the fact that it all seems to be my fault is incredible really! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

What about asking your mum to have a word with her and explain how you feel, or send her a card/letter expressing it?


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

My Mum won't say anything to upset her cause she's pregnant! I sent her a email last night saying that I'm sure she does know how to be around me because she's pregnant and I've just been given this news and that I'm sure she needs support with a second one on the way and I def need it to help with my grieving process and that that ignoring the situation doesn't make it go away!
I feel I shouldn't really have made the first move but on top of everything else I'm going through this is hurting me to so I couldn't just leave it? But I've heard nothing back! xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Maybe she doesn't know how to reply by email...I know it means making the effort but how about arranging to meet soemwhere neutral for a drink and talk x


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Merse -    people without IF don't ever seem to understand. you would think they might be able to think it through but no, I don't think they ever understand it unless they have been through yourself. If your sis knew how much you were hurting inside I'm sure it would be different - she probably can't even imagine it. Sorry it is so hard. you are still grieving and allowed to behave however you want - sod everyone else. We love you hun and are here for you   
Beach - anything posh for tea tonight? 
just had chicken tikka korma, rice and some dahl   Feeding my cold. Feel pants  
Nicks


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## roozie (Mar 25, 2007)

Merse, nothing you've said is remotely unreasonable, far from it! I think Nicki's prob. hit the nail on the head - people without IF problems can't get their heads around any of it and simply can't relate to any of it. That doesn't excuse them not making any kind of effort to be supportive though so your sis should be grateful you've tried to reconcile things a bit with your email. I'm sure she'll get back to you... could she just have been nowwhere near a PC today, perhaps a v innocent explanation for not replying yet...? Try not to let her stress you out too much - i'm sure it will resolve itself more over time.   

Sorry to hear you're lurgy ridden NW.. time of year i'm afraid. Joel's got a stinking one so not letting him near me! He's already been banished to the spare room at night because sleeping's such a nightmare, so poor bloke, probably feels totally unloved at the mo! I have been finding that i've been premanently snuffly since about week 18 so maybe it's an element of that too? (esp. at night times... lots of yucky red bogies). Oh and yes, am now 24 weeks + 2. Next scan etc at week 25. 

Beach, crates of yummy food and wine sounds good..... i hate relying on DH to do the shopping, bless him. He brings back so much sh*te!

God, the weather is foul out there...... DH's out delivering a big evening buffet, so it'll be soggy sarnies all round i think.

About to stick Friends on in bed, first series, it's quality. I'm quite grateful for my crap memory, it's like watching them from scratch all over again....


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Rooz - Maybe you could do some internet shopping? I hate tim doing the shopping he always ust brings back 4 sets of dinner and nothing else!!  

Merse - I echo what everyone else has said.  Its not fair, you should have everyone rallying around and looking after you. Being preg is not an illness after all its a beautiful wonderful thing!!!    I think telling your sister exactly how you feel is a good move and sit and chat and get it out in the open.... is she an evil ogre?  I'm sure shes not??  Maybe she just doesn't want to wave her big belly in front of you??  Enjoy Brighton I love it!!!    MAybe we could do a brighton meet up?!  

NIcks - Oh poor you... curry for a cold is a fab idea.  Get it al out.    I love a curry... we are having chinese tonight though.  Will be nice and spicy though.


Preg ones - So these pains you having are they exactly the same as AF pains?  Dunno I expect them to be different??!! I have been preg but when you not trying or expecting you just ignore these things and don't take any notice??


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Hello my darlings!

Sorry I didn't post earlier - was kacked and went to bed for a nap. Feel all fuzzy-headed now - hope I'll be able to stay up.

Merse - you poor thing. Your sister sounds a right old baggage! Is that the only one you've got? No other siblings to have a word for you? I only have one sister and there's a lot unsaid between us too, so I know what you're saying when you say you don't want to start that conversation.
Only do it if it makes you feel better - seriously. You don't owe her a thing. If she can't even think vaguely how it would feel, then sod her. You have us!  

Nicks - I've been on manuka honey and lemon, and Lemsip seems ok too. I hate this dark and wet - bah! If I can't take the dogs out I feel a real spare part.

Laura - hello pregnant lady!   Told you the sore boobs would come back - it's only later they seem to stay on all the time. I'm geting all excited about your naughty early testing!  
I did find, however, that it was easier psychologically to test from really early - day 10, so I got used to the old process. Do you know how much HCG was in your trigger shot?

Karen - has your sis got children then? It's so hard, buying those presants all the time, wondering when it's going to be you. It's one of the reasons why I hate Christmas - it feels so, so sad. Why aren't you close? We've managed to have a laugh in the last few years, but I'm still wary, wondering when mine's going to tell me off again! The last convo we had she screeched that our choice of name for a boy was all wrong, that the kid would get picked on at school for being called Robert Robertson! 
So even now I'm pg it's hard.

Rooz - hi! It's such a relief to know you're ok - try to pop in at least once a day! Have you thought of names for triplets? What about the Three degrees? or the Bee Gees? Ah, hang on - you have a mix in there. Um... Are you on ********? If you are I'll send you instructions on how to add me, then we can scrab!
My DH would just bring back biscuits if I sent him shopping - I'm dreading being incapacitated!

Hi Loubella! Welcome to the best thread on FF! Yes, DHEA seems to work magic with egg quality 0 very important if you only get a few. You can order it from www.agestop.com - it's cheap as chips, mercifully. I experimented with it, as Minxy says, it's not advisable to self-medicate so I was really careful with it. I took the recommended dose for a week (75mg a day) then got my GP to test my testosterone, as it can make it high. Based on that I reduced it to 50mg. My testosterone was still in the normal range, but at the higher end of it, you see. Plus, I was only 34 and thought the standard dose is really for women over 40.
As someone's told you - Laura I think - long protocol isn't usually recommended for poor responders. But it strikes me you were on a VERY low dose on Menopur. Many of us have been on 450iu (6 vials) per day. My last cycle I was on 450 - a mix of Gonal F and Menopur, plus letrazole tablets, which work in a similar way to Clomid.
Perhaps a short protocol with a medium dose could be helpful - but don't go on that long protocol again! A new protocol helps with positivity anyway.
Have you had an AMH test? That's a far more reliable test of ovarian reserve as it doesn't pogo around - I'd have never known I was menopausal but for that as my FSH is fine.
Where are you being treated?
Put it this way - reserve schmeserve - you only need a few good eggs.

Odette - there you are! Productions really take up your time, don't they? Roll on the end of the run!

How's everyone else? Gab? Are you there tonight?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx




/links


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra - I had 10,000 of Hcg.  I think it should be gone after 10 days so that was Wednesday.  I was thinking of doing my early test Sunday, then another on tue and then again on Thurs.  Or you think I should use my early tester tom and then go buy more!!!!


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Depends! I found that way I didn't build it up too much in my head. The routine every morning was get up, wee in a pot, make a cuppa and do the test while having my tea. It almost felt normal after a few days!

It felt a darn sight better than not daring to test till the day then getting that huge build-up - I felt like I was having a heart attack last cycle when I tested!  This time was much more casual.

xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

LB - are your boobs sore again then?   I never used to get AF pains before AF had started so that would have been a sign for me. The ones since BFP are front not back but can deffo tell its uterus. Who knows whether to test early - i never did this time even though I suspected something - spose I thought i must be mad to think a miracle might have happened. Was still v faint line though on day period due
Rooz - yes you must check in everyday. I worry about you at night   You know what us preggers ladies are like sleeping!  
My Dh would come back from shopping with a bag of organic carrots and some pomegranites or someother wierd combo - nothing to actually eat for tea!  
Mirra - you still got enough energy to walk anywhere?   I'm impressed! Hope you are having a nice lie in tomorrow  
Nicks


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanks girls glad I've got you lot! Yes I only have one sis and shes always been selfish through the whole 5 years of me ttc shes hardly asked a thing, never knew when any of my appoints were or asked much about them! But I made a real effort when she was preg first time even took her shopping for me to buy her baby things! Was the first up the hospital (on my own as DH working) after my parents, even helped them home the next day and left them with dinners I'd made them! And when she had her episode of thinking she was preg then not I spent a whole afternoon with her telling her it would be alright and she'd fall again really quick! (which she fell the next month!) And I get a sodding email and a hard time!!! Oh I'm so glad I've told you that I've been bottling it up for ages thinking I'm a terrible sister but now I know I'm bloody not!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra - I feel the same, I tesed on a work day last cycle but as I'd tested the 3 prior days I had accepted it was going to be a negative.  So I think I will do the same time, just not sure when to start the testing!!  

Merse - You are far from the evil sister.    We would throw youoff the thread if you were horrid!!  

Nicks - we were laughing atmens shoping at work, they will spend £20 on weird ingredients for one meal and then buy nothing else!


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Sorry not been around earlier, just catching up with Spooks, we taped 3 episodes so now watching them.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Evening Ladies......well just got back from work and you guessed its the WEEKEND....so guess what Im slurping right now.....you are right...its a lovely CUP OF COFFEE....seriously Its a glass of Asti....Its been an awful day so glad to be finished....just chilling now....

Minxy - Just thought I'd say G'day......I love oz we are hoping to move out there someday...providing we pass the medicals....its lovely.....xxxx

Hey Laura ...whats this about early testing....didnt I say i had a feeling in my water....I knew it....ssshhh better not say anything....I also had the same feeling with Mir and there you go....!!!!!!!

Beach - Do you have a little sherbet on the go then?...... 

Merse - all I can say sweetheart, is I really feel for you....my mother is not supportive at all either....I have four brothers (let me add that I dont really see)....they are the apple of my mums eye.....
anyway the last time I went in for my op....the day I got home my mum said I dont know why you just dont have a hysterectomy and just have everything taken away then you wont have to keep going in and out of hospital........What an awful thing to say I thought.....NO MOTHER actually Im clinging on to any hope I have of having another baby and a sibling for my son.....As you know we have been ttc for over ten years now and my mother just does not have a clue.....Merse  ....Im sorry I really feel for you and really think your sister and mother are well out of order....maybe Im speaking out of turn...but I really think they should be here for you right now.....Never say never Merse...you could have children in the future..   ..you never know..I just cant believe yr mother and sister are being like this....why should you do all the running when it is you that is really hurting right now...They should be there for you right now..like you said she's PG....its not an illness...I dont think you are being unreasonable at all...like Mir said we are here for you sweetheart....and hope that we can give you the support you need right now.... .....(dont mean to go on but really think some people dont have a clue sometimes...)

So how's everyone else then.....Nic hope those patients are behaving themselves..... .......

Roozie..- so glad that everything is going alright honey....love to you and the brood..... 

Pin - thinking of you wherever you are...... 

Odette - Hello honey.....wont be long till spain sweetie.......  

Jend - Hello..... 

Loubella - Welcome....they are all mad on here........ . .......... 

I better post this...as there has been 3 new replies already....feeling a wee bit tipsy and tired already so not sure what Im typing...perfect time to beat me at scrab..... ....You lot are the best......


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Gab- yes we opened a bottle of red with dinner x


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Merse - You have your frostie.  Please don't give up all hope, as we said beofre you have tubes and ovaries and  a womb... 'where theres a womb theres a way'  

Gab - Yes weekend!!!  No booze for me though but thats ok as I'm PUPO!  

Anyway Ugly Betty is on ow so off to watch that... back later.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanks girls, I've had a reply saying she'd like to see more of me but didn't want to rub my nose in it! So I replied and said its not the fact thats she's pregnant its the fact I'm having a tough time an I need my family to look after me not abandon me! 
Gab my Mum is usually fab but she's a nightmare when people are pregnant treats them like they would break! And she can't stand confronting my sis as her temper is terrible! But I must say I feel let down by her over this.
Laura PUPO girl feel good for you!! 
Beach I'm on the red but think I've got more tears in my glass than vino! So emotional!!!
lol to all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Merse - Whas happening with your counselling?  Are none of us near you to come and make a vist? You need a big giant bear hug!!!        Dialuting the wine!!    This MUST stop!


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Merse - Im really sorry honey...I didnt mean to say yr mother was unfeeling...I just wish she could understand how much you are hurting right now....how much you need her right now....your sister should understand too...she should Merse PG or not....its not up to you to watch what you say right now, she should be trying to comfort you and be there for you...after all you have been through...I think you are doing pretty well considering..........xxxx


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Laura I didn't go for counselling but perhaps I should Diluting wine def needs sorting!!
Gab you didn't say anything wrong I think the same!! xxxxxxxxxx


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Off to bed now to watch I'm a celeb as got bad head from all the crying! Hopefully feel betta tom! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Merse ....nite,nite sweetheart...take a couple of paracetamol for the headache...go and take a drink to bed and have a few glasses, make sure youve got water by yr bed too...have a nice cuddle with dh...and go to sleep tomorrow is another day.............


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Actually im off to bed in a wee while too., nite,nite..so take care girlies......Laura...... .....NAUGHTY.............dont let Mir lead you astray...take care my friends...catch up tomorrow after some sleep.....xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Ach, test, test and test again! Yay! Desensitise yourse;f against the evil peesticks!

Sorry I've been so long - went to watch Ugly Betty and Pete grabbed the puter. Really must get a laptop/network that works!

Merse - that's a good reply from your sis - at least it means she's trying to think of you, rather than just being an insensitive clot! Try not to feel too let down by your mum - she can't understand how much IF cripples you. But tell her - she needs to know that it's you who needs support right now.

Gab - I'm a Celeb was the right winner, eh? Bless im. Nearly cried when he was hugging his partner at the end and crying -  
How come you had an awful day?

Karen - how was Spooks?

Laura - have you scrabbed? You need to keep Tilly's brain tip-top!

Nicks - walking's great! I'm cooped up in an office all day, or driving, so getting out and walking is the only exercise I get. I hate having an office job - unless I could do it at home, that is.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Spooks was silly, hope the real MI5 aren't as stupid.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I've never watched it! Are they not meant to be silly then?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Mir- they're meant to instill confidence in the security of the UK, that lot had more slip ups than a banana skin x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Oh dear! I like The Wire in The Blood, me. Just read the book - Oh. My. God. So brilliant.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

What do you read?


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Any old rubbish, really, but I love a well-written thriller/murder. The best book I've read in YEARS was a Stephen Fry - The Stars' Tennis Balls. That left me gasping. Really psychologically enthralling.

I also like easy reads - Judy Astley, etc. Good novelly books that you can get into then forget.

Problem is, I don't communicate with anyone while I'm reading - just get totally absorbed! It's the only way to properly relax for me.

What are you into?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

I love Jodi Picoult, read a lot of best sellers, like thrillers and things like the Labyrinth, and Shadow of the Wind but also girly reads that you can pick up easily.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Same here! It's the only time, apart from sleep, where I totally switch off/focus.

Best thing about holidays - the reading. Oh, and the food, swimming and sex!

I'm hoping if we downsize we might get a holiday each year. It might be possible!


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Mir- have you read the Book Of Lost Things by John Connelly?


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

No - what's it like?


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## lucky_mum (Dec 16, 2005)

Hi all 

hope you don't mind me joining you - I have been lurking for a long time and following your stories but this is the first time I have posted here. I think this is a great thread and you are all so supportive of each other  I have met Miranda before on the "Multiple Cycles" thread and have been PMing her as am very interested in going to Jinemed for my next try at ICSI.

A little about me - my lovely DH and I had 3 ICSIs and 5 IUIs between January 2006 and January 2007 - all unsuccessful and I have never been pregnant. We ran out of money after the last one (the first ICSI and 3 x IUI were on the NHS) and have only just now got the money to try again and think about where it will be. All of my previous treatment was at Holly House, which is an excellent clinic for some, but didn't do it for me - I got the donor egg speech at my last follow up. I have thought a lot in the last few months and know that although I have opened my mind up to using donor eggs as a way forward if I need it one day, I am not yet ready to give up on my own eggs and want one more try at another clinic, with hopefully a different outlook and outcome from my previous treatments!

I was so crushed/depressed after the last failure and the donor egg speech and to be honest was totally exhausted with treatment and even posting on FF, I have taken time out and have now recharged myself and am feeling positive again and able to throw myself back in, so thought finally joining in with this thread would be a good start!

All of my ICSI cycles were SP, on Fostimon (stims) for all of them, on the last cycle I was on 600 units per day, with Cetrotide to stop ovulation. The one cycle I tried Fostimon plus Merional for some LH I got one big fat follicle which overtook the smaller ones and so the cycle was cancelled/converted to IUI. The other cycles were as follows -

1st: 5 follicles/2 eggs/2 fertilised and transferred day 2
2nd: 2 follicles/5 eggs (go figure!)/3 fertilised/2 made it to day 3 and transferred
3rd: 2 follicles/3 eggs/2 fertilised and transferred day 3

My FSH has ranged from 7.8 when we started to 12.1 before my last cycle, I had it tested last month and it was 11.2. I tried wheatgrass before our last cycle but it didn't seem to make any difference, I was under a lot of stress though and am sure having so many tx in one year had bumped it up - I still have a load left so will probably start taking it again.

I started 50mg per day DHEA last week - I have always had excellent quality grade 1 embies (to look at), but figured it can't do me any harm. It also seemed like a good idea after reading that the Jinemed were pleased that Miranda took it, as we think we will be emailing them this weekend to ask for treatment in March/April next year (maybe the same time as you Gabrielle? maybe us Essex girls could keep eachother company if Jinemed could fit me in that early?).

I look forward to getting to know you all, and wish you all so much luck    with your treatments/pregnancies, you truly all deserve some luck and have all been an inspiration to me.

Sorry if that was long and a bit of a babble! 



Steph xx

P.S. I am also a ******** scrabble addict, if anyone fancies a game (especially late at night as I am a night owl!) drop me a PM!


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## Guest (Dec 1, 2007)

Steph -  I did wonder why you were posting at 3am - I thought may be you were an international FF'er like me, but no, you're just an insomniac    I've never heard of Fostimon before - what is it made up of?  I've always been on menopur and for my last two tx I produced 6 & 8 eggs respectively.  On my first I had 2 blasts put back but got a bfn and on my last tx I had a 3dt with assisted hatching.    I did get a bfp but it was short lived.  I'm going for FET in Jan, again with AH.  Have you had AH?  May be it's something to consider for your next cycle.  Anyhow, welcome to the best thread on FF  

Merse    Sorry to hear about your woes with your sister.  It's so hard having a preggers sister.  Mine seems to be the total opposite of yours and keeps phoning me all the time.  Whilst I'm really happy for her, for her to keep phoning me it's just a constant reminder that she's pregnant and I'm not.  My sister is older than me so I think she's just worried about me and wants to look after me.  I have to admit that I have avoided a couple of her calls as I always seem to cry afterwards.  May be we should swap sisters for a while - you can have my phone mad sister and I'll have your mute one    Seriously sweetie, I know it must be so hard for you and I really hope you can get your relationship with her back on track   

Gab -   Do you ever had a night of the Asti    We've just ordered all our booze for Christmas - we get it from Oz duty free and its so much cheaper than in HK.  

Karen - Oh scrab mistress - hope you're ok.  what's on the menu tonight?  I have to say that I was with Nickster - I hadn't a clue what parmenter pots were until you explained.

Laura - PUPO lady - have you tested this morning?  Hope you're not going too mad.  Sore boobies are a good sign   

The preggers ladies...Rooz, Nickster and Mira -    Nick - congrats on your three poo's - I'm very jealous!

Hi to Odette, Pin, Swinny, Linzipops & everyone else...too many to mention.

Well I still have PMT and no sign of AF.  The AF pains have subsided now so I have no idea when she'll arrive.  Felt low all week which I think is PMT or at least I hope it is and it's not depression.  

Have a good weekend x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Morning!

Absurdly early I know - woke up and went to the loo and the dogs had pooed twice on the rug, so there's no going back to sleep after clearing that lot up. They're probably confused after being let out  at half five every day this week.

Hopefully I'll be tired in a mo - I did go to bed at 1am!!!

Emma - I hope it's PMT too - the last thing you could do with is depression.   Are you going out hiking this weekend? That always helps. Are you looking forward to Christmas? My decs come down from the loft on December 1, so I'll be tree dressing later. It's the only thing I like about Christmas!
I guess you'll have to buy things as you moved over there this year? Or did you take your decs with you?

Steph - hello! Hooray for insomniacs and international FF-ers! It means I get to scrab when I rise from my pit at sparrow's fart...
I agree with Em, I've hardly heard of fostimon. Menopur seems to be the drugs of choice for PRs.
Hopefully the Jinemed will sort you out with a whole new protocol - they did with me, anyway.

Right - off to see if you've both scrabbed!

xxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 1, 2007)

Mira - Bought the decs with us.  The Christmas tree is being delivered on Monday so I'll put the decs up then.  Not looking forward to Christmas really - it's mainly for kids and as this seems to be the umpteenth Christmas that we've been trying it just seems to make it all the more depressing.  Not hiking this weekend as I need to spend some time with DH and he can't hike at the mo due to his leg.  DH has been working mad hours recently and he's away next week on business.  I've spent a lot of time in the apartment alone recently which I don't think has helped matters.  I do get out and do something everyday but not working means you don't have a purpose.  God, I never thought I'd be wanting to work!  I do have a lot of friends here but I've just been really moody recently and haven't wanted to socialise much.  Crikey, I sound like great fun to be with    ...sorry for the rant!  Hope you get some sleep later x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I know exactly what you mean - there's such a thing as too much time to think! I think it must be really hard for you after moving halfway round the world to not have something to do.

You're a very strong person not to let this all make you mad.  Have you got a hobby that you could turn into a business? I can't remember what you did for a living before.

Could you have a little trip to the UK if he's working away? That would be lovely - see people and do the Christmas shopping 'at home'.

The less you get out and have to do it, the less sociable I find I become. My work has it's Christmas do tonight and though there'll be loads of nice people there I won't go. I've got too comfy just scrabbing and FFing!

Speaking of which - scrab! Have a scrab and keep your brain sharp!


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Mir- must be something in the air, one of my cats did the exact same thing yesterday 

Em-planning to do a sirloin joint this afternoon and eat early

Steph- hi and welcome to this thread, they're a lovely bunch and you'll feel very welcome

Hello to ervyone else, just done a huge post and then lost it!!!


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Bum! I hate losing big posts - how annoying! You mean your cat did a whoopsie?

I couldn't believe it - two piles on the only bloody rug in the house.

Fortunately I'd bought carpet cleaner only the other day. Thank heaven it wasn't cat poo! Or cat wee - yuk - you can never get cat wee out if you catch it too late. Where did yours relieve themselves?

I blame my stepson's dog - a horse of a hound, who weed on the rug last Sunday. We've had two accidents since then.

Mmmn, sirloin? Everyone round to Karen's this afty!

Are you scrabbing dearest?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Ours was on the rung too, thankfully it lifted straight off....made DH sort it out though x

Yes I'm scrabbing, sat here listening xmas carols too.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Really? I guess I'll have to listen to carols when I go shopping - aaaaaaaargh.

How are you spending Christmas?

Lucky you on the poo - these two were squidgy and it was a devil of a job geting it out. Yuk.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

You're not going to shopping today are you?  It'll be packed!


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Tomorrow I think - free parking and slightly fewer people. I have no idea what I'm going to buy anybody, and just don't feel like it really. If I had the slightest idea I'd do it online!

I bet you've started yours, haven't you? My next pay day is Christmas Eve, so I'd better do it now I suppose...


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## Guest (Dec 1, 2007)

Beach - mmmm sirloin sounds yummy.  I don't have beef often as DH is a Hindu and doesn't like it in the house.  I get my fix by eating juicy burgers  when I'm out with friends.

Mira - Have got a few irons on the fire re jobs but don't want to say too much as it may jinx things.  I did look into doing a TEFL course and I was accepted on it but it starts in Jan for one month, full time.  It's very intensive and you have to do homework and assignments after hours.  I want to do FET in Jan and I've never had any desire to be a teacher before now, so I'm not really sure why I applied.  The course is also £1500 which is a lot of wonga and I'd rather spend it on FET.  I've deferred my place until April when the next course is.  I used to work for the government doing forensic accounting so am looking to do something similar here.  The problem is I want to work part time and it's very hard to get pt work in HK.  Re the Christmas do - I always find they are an anti climax, so you're probably better off with X-Factor or SCD and your lap top.

It's turned cold here in HK - I'm wearing long sleeves now!


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls
my bloody dog has weed in the kitchen and its run down all the cracks in the tiles so its now all over the kitchen!!! 
AF arrived in the night so not much sleep due to pain but dosed myself up now so hopefully can enjoy weekend in Brighton with the girls! But just wanted to say thanks for your support yesterday I feel better today (apart from AF pains and being tired!) think the crying helped and telling my sis how I feel has helped to!
Have a good week end all!
Laura or Beach can you text me if theres any news from Pin?  
xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Merse- haven't heard a thing at all x


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Laura just texed Pin had a very traumatic time but Olivia Jane is gorgeous 9lb 1oz!
Laura is lying in bed worrying about her lack of sore boobs!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 1, 2007)

Oh that's wonderful news            Well done Pin, what a great weight!...and a lovely name.  Congratulations to you and DH


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Oh I forgot to say congratulations well done Pin!!!!    xxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Congrats Pin!      
Our first PR baby!
LB - any testing?   
Glad you are feeling a bit better today Merse   Always wanted sister but having second thoughts now.   Have a lovely bro who I always talked to about the IF stuff - really understanding. 
Hi Steph!   Don't you remember me from jan/feb snowdrops? Another one with not very many eggs   Good to see you here. Lets hope you have some luck in Turkey especially with the DHEA.
Ems - you have someone to talk to in the middle of the night now! Hope they deliver your booze from Oz!  
Mirra - weirdly my cat did a huge barf yesterday in the study complete with huge fur ball (well fur tube actually!)  
Gabs - weekend off?  
Inc - any developements hun?  
Off for bacon, egg and sausage brunch now   Slept really badly and full of cold.
Love to all I've missed
Nicks


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Ugh - everyone's had some sort of animal drama in the last 24 hours! Maybe it was a bad night.

Congrats Pin! Our first PR baby!

Pictures when you can please!

Merse - when are you setting off for Brighton? Sounds fun! Even with nasty AF-ness.

Emma - forensic accounting! You're just trying to sex up the word accountant, aren't you?   Seriously, that sounds so interesting - are you required to give evidence in fraud cases?

Laura - get out of that bed and come talk to us!

Think I might put those bulbs in I keep putting off - it's blinking December now. Plus I have to dye my eyebrows and drive to Beaminster to pick up a Word disk, so I can carry on with my epic book!

Ah yes, and this eve I will be geting the tree down and making the place look festive.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Pin, congratulations on the birth of your baby girl, over the moon


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Bye girls just off now I'll have a drink for you all xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Merse- have two at least


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## Guest (Dec 1, 2007)

Have a great time Merse, I'm just going out myself.

Mira - Yes, you've sussed me out    Yes have given evidence loads of times for fraud and drugs cases - no matter how many times I do it I always get nervous.  Shame the Judges I get are never as spunky as Judge John Deed!

Right, off out now.  Am going to limit myself to two glasses of wine otherwise I'll get depressed tomorrow and have a hangover.....well I might push it to three...it's a Saturday night!  Have a lovely day all of you


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Emma- enjoy your night out, have a bottle of bubbly as well


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi All,

Not getting up today I've decided!    So got laptop in bed. Which is slow and the space bar is a bit crap to excuse any errors.

Pin- Hoorah!!!!  Our first PR bubbs!!  Hope you home soon.  

Well I'm ****** off, boobs not sore OR even big.  This is bad.  And I have been consitpated last 2 days but it all just came out..(sorry tmi) which always happens before AF.  Really amazing the difference a day makes.  Yesterday i was so sure it had worked. Today, sure its not.  Boobs note even tender when I poke them.     I know some people don't get sore boobs but I did with my nat preg.  Iknow you'll all post something positive but it just doesn't help as we all know our bodies. 

Anyway I'm gonna do some xmas shopping online now.

As for Books I love Jodi Pic too!  I've read most of them now.  I am reading at the moment 'we need to talk about Kevin' which is about being the mother of a boy who shots loads of his peers in his school. Its great as shows the bad side of being a parent (sorry preg ladies) and so can make you think well at least that won't happen to me!!!!   

XXX


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

We ought to start a book club and recommend certain books and have discussions on them and also swap books with each other.

Laura- enoy your day in bed, wrap up and snuggle down cos it's cold out there.  Do you know what shopping you're after?  I;ve done lots of mine online, so much easier than getting barged past in the shops x


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well this morning I have written a list of who I still need to buy for and some ideas soI'm just looking around.  Iordered all the easy CDs and books last weekend  so now the more complicated people!!

X


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

OK, OK, we won't be positive for you then!   But I have to say that symptoms come and go like THE WIND at this stage. OK? OK.

And stop poking yer darn baps birdie!   They'll be sore again tomorrow. Are they lumpy?

I have just dug up the weeds that were annoying me! Feel weary now, so bit of a rest before planting the bulbs I think. I feel so much better for being on me legs though.

Having a bacon and black pud sarnie made for me, so that'll give me strength to carry on.

Well if we're recommending books, you MUST read The Stars' Tennis Balls - amazing. It's about this public school boy who makes another boy so jealous with his 'perfect' life the boy manages to engineer his being put away in a mental institution for years. I can't say more than that without spoiling it, but it's quite the best thing I've read for years. Stephen fry - get it!

Inc - have you ordered that Anne Dickson book? I prommise you it's ace.

Emma - that's so exciting! I love court - if being a reporter meant only court work I'd still be one. I can't imagine taking the stand - how scary is that? My phone went off in court once and I thought I'd die of embarrassment. Only like crown court though - magistrates is too bitty and they haven't enough powers to keep me enthralled! It's ok when a district judge is there though.
Human theatre - love it!

xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Going to post this in two parts as lap top playing up and keep losing wireless…..…

Pin……     .........Welcome to the world baby Olivia Jane…..lots of love to you all.....xxxxx

Nics – Was that you weekend off or me….enjoy it honey .you work so hard, hope yr team have been behaving themselves…Hope you are also wellxxxx.

Mir – Hello honey…how are you then? You are like me…we like to get our crimbo decs up Dec 1st…so dh always humors me. Dh and ds are have also talked me into to having a real tree this year…will just need to watch the dogs, but I’m sure it will make the living room smell lovely….Today is another day…yesterday happened and now its gone…lots of things made me upset yesterday but best leave them there…..anyway my endo cons was in one of the theatres yesterday and I ended up having a really good heart to heart with my endo cons, spoke about surgery, endo, hormone therapy and IVF etc…he also asked how my dh and I were getting on…I just said he seems to be really angry right now with our clinic etc….I also told him about our fert cons, I explained that It was confidential but just needed to get things off my chest…he was really understanding and even said that yes we should have been taken into a room and had our situation discussed before carrying on with the ET…so at least we agree on something…Anyway I feel if he does tell his colleague…then his colleague will know that we were not happy with the management of last cycle and that we have lost confidence in the clinic and also in him as a cons….It will be interesting to see what he will have to say. I love yr picture of yr wee dog, he is lovely…..How’s wee Rab..aswell, kisses for him too…..take care….xxxxxxx

Merse – No doubt you will be on yr way now…just wanted to say take care…enjoy yourself, get drunk and be silly….try not to think of other things and just have a nice weekend… ..xxxx

Beach – You got a baggy head honey….you really sound like you know yr way in the kitchen….I bet you and dh don’t eat out a lot…you don’t need to if you serve dishes like that up…..that roast sounds…mmm…mmm….mmmm…. ...xxxx

Ems – are you still up honey….hope you are also ok…..I think it is a good idea you are thinking about going to work…PT would be good even if its in HK….hopefully something will turn up…..sometimes Work gives you a focus …and also some pocket money too…take care…hugs across the net… …xxxxxxxx

Odette – Hello honey…… 

Linziloo – Thinking of you…..take extra special care….  xxx

Swinny – wont be long now sweetie…Im really excited for you….  ..xxxx

Roozie – How is the clan honey…take extra special care…hope dh is doing all the housework and you are not lifting a finger…xxxx……….

Minxy – Hello Natasha, hope you are well….Oz is another world isn’t it…x

Jend – Hello hen….is it snowing yet up there…I really miss that.....send us some snow…. ...xxx

Steph – Welcome…..as Mir said this is the Best Thread…I was really down for a time when I first started posting on here and the girls on here have really helped me to gradually climb out of that pit…Even though my IF story is slightly different in that I already have my ds…the girls on here have been really supportive and they are always there to listen and offer advice even though they have their own issues going on…, they have become really good FF in a short space to time. Good luck on your Journey…just wanted to add also…sorry about mix-up I married an Essex boy but I live in Portsmouth.  Anyway look forward to catching up with you soon…x 

Sorry If ive missed anyone....Anyway we are away to have a look for a tree now…so catch up soon ladies….actually looking forward to AF for once..so that my system can get back to normal and can get the rest of my bloods done.. for Easter….catch up soon….girlies..xx

Please…..Please….give me a wee chance at scrabble……(Pleading)… ..xxxxxxxxx



No doubt I missed someone..sorry if I have....xxxxxxx Gab


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Oh why are my boobs all soft and squiggy!!!!     I have a head ache but I also get bad heads before AF.  Or itcould be I knocked a stupid cat ornament on my head this morning when scrabbling around for my phone!  I now have a bad bump on my head....sexy.  Had AF pains again.  Oh I'm such a moaner.  Sorry.

Oh I may order that book for my mate for xmas as she loves steven fry.

Anyone around?  I'm still in bed... really must get up soon. House a mess.

-Oh Gab your here!!

XX


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

My dear Inc - hope you are ok...how are you this weekend....I know its a horrible saying but sometimes things do actually happen for a reason so maybe a rest is what you need and there will be a big surprise for you next cycle.....  ....take care...xxxxxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Congratulations Pin            

Good that you got it off your chest GAb....  Buying a Xmas tree - that's a thought... 

Laura - how many days till the test?  Should be soon now...?

Mir - didn't buy the book as yet....

Hello to everybody else...


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Im not doing very well am I..... 


Laura....my PUPO Laura....how are we.....? ....

Try and stay positive I know...its hard when you get all these twinges and signs and headaches especially....but the band aint playing...the lady aint singing and the crowd havent turned up yet..so sending lots of                 ...you never know..and you dont yet so dont give up sweetie...ok......lol....Gab...... ....xxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra - No they not lumpy, just horrid and flat and non-perky!  I wish I'd tested this morning now.  Maybe I should test now or is that just a silly idea?  Should be first wee of the day  really.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

because you have 5 days to go...im sure you wouldnt get a true result because yr wee is more concentrated in the morning how do you feel.....xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Just gotbad headache,thats it.  But that could be AF anyway.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

You could have a test - as long as you realise it's probably not going to be positive AT THIS STAGE. For me it was a way of numbing myself to the peestick process, so all my hopes didn't hang on one solitary pee test. It would have to be really early implantation to release that much HCG this early, but I just found testing repeatedly helped.

Then of course you have tomorrow - day 12! So possibly five tests - you should be used to them by then.

I get lumpy boobs when it's AF, don't know about you. I think that's why I felt it was different this time - they were sore intermittently, but not lumpy.

Gab - good that you spoke to the guy. I'm sure it'll help - it's not like you're going back to that clinic for tx, so what the hell?

Inc - hello!

xxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I think I may be getting a migraine... struggling to read the posts!

That may be a good sign  If you know what I mean... either that or I have a concussion?!


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Are you drinking enough water sweetie remember while you were stimming you were on at least 2 litres..that could be yr headache...headaches can also indicate hormone changes which could be a good sign... ...I know on another thread some girlies were getting headaches and got BFP's  ....when they tested....also stress too...dont mention the witch....sssshhhh she aint coming ok........   ...I broke her broomstick when she flew down and saw me on Halloween...... ...come on Mrs....PMA......   ....If you are finding it hard Im going to be positive for you.....                       ..........  (CHEERS)...only joking not started yet...(HONEST)...xxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

......


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Thanks gab!!!  I am so much better when I am working,I am terrible just sitting at home... yes I know I should have got up and done something but I haven't as I'm slipping into depression!!!!   Agh!!!!  

Think I'll have asnooze get rid of my head!

X


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Mir - I thought so too.....had a little blub....  as it was in one of the offices at work, but the way I look at it atleast he saw how upset I was and that It was really bothering me...he also mentioned that when he operates he will bear in mind that we are still ttc so will only do surgery that wont interfeer with that so that is reassuring....Our follow up at our clinic is next week might have to dose myself up a bit before I go either that or have a stiff whisky.....know what I mean...also dh is not going to tell him till the end that we are not going back so will wait and see what he is going to say first....we will def not be going back..but it will be interesting to see if he had another plan....Going out for our tree in a mo..... 

Not as frisky now....is this DHEA still working...or could it be that AF is due....xxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Is Tim not back yet then?...xxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Tims gone training on his bike.  XX


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Hopefully he will be back soon... ......text him to get a scary dvd on his way home always works for me.... ...

anyway sorry honey...popping off for a mo...going to the forest to find a tree.....what is my dh on... ...only joking wont be long honey...speak soon.....


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Have fun tree shopping.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- I know positivity is off the agenda at the moment so relax ok x

Gab- hope you can fit the tree into the house?


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well i did a test and surprise surprise it was neg!


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- that's because it's Tilly is still implanting, cone on girl where's your fighting spirit, it's lying in bed that's getting you down, go and put some clothes on and dance round the living room to christmas songs  x


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Beach  - I know getting up will help but I just can't do it.  I've tried a couple of times but can't.  I just feel so sad. I can't stand the thought of never being preg but I also can't stand the thought of another awful cycle.  I feel nothing good will ever happen to me.  Sorry right old whingebag today.    It just hurts so much to do this over and over and still get nothing back.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- I know exactly how you feel,   I know it's hard to stay postive as well and although this site is great sometimes you end up being more fed up than ever don't you.

What time is Tim due home?

I'm hoping to start our next cycle next March-April and when we were writing christmas cards out earlier I said to Alex it would be lovely to be able to put from Karen, Alex and bump... x


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Christmas is hard for us anyway as 2 years ago I was preg overxmas and it just makes me sad that I was so ****** off about it as I wanted to eat and drink everything abd couldn't.  I'd never drink again now if it meant I could have a baby.

I think your right I need to get off this computer and get my lifeback.


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

Hi everyone.  Sorry it's been so long I've been doing research on the advise you've all given me.  Thankyou so much to you all - I've got plenty of things to try now.  
I'm sorry but I won't be able to answer some questions just yet as I have realised that there is a lot of things I don't about my previous cycles.  I don't know what my lining was or FSH.  Ive only ever had 1 embryo and I don't know what grade it was.  I'm going to call the clinic on Monday and ask for a copy of my casenotes.  I'm at Liverpool Womens. They don't do GIFT there but there are other clinics near to me that do.  I will need to find another clinic anyway even if I want to try ICSI again, they've only ever offerred us the same type of cycles everytime - long protocol (I wouldn't have even known that if it wasn't for you all) only increasing the dose everytime and since they've said 8 amps is the maximum and that didn't work I don't really see the point in staying there anyway.  I've never had the inhibin B or AMH tests but I will be doing now.  I tried to get clomid from my local hospital but they refused.  
I have been looking at natural IVF - has anyone ever tried that?  I tried to go for IVM but the consultant there said there was no chance it would work with someone that has poor ovarian reserve but he was kind enough to scan me anyway and I was actually really suprised when they found 7 follicles.  I've never had that many even on my cycles so I've had it in my head that the drugs make it worse.  Now I know that's there's different drugs out there and different ways to use them it gives me hope.  Do your doctors all tell you about different options or did you all find out about these alternatives by exchanging stories? I feel as though the doctors have kept me in the dark.  
Just wanted to say congratulations to Pin.  It's was so good to read that it worked for you.  Last week I thought there was no hope and I should try to accept this and get on with my life but since I've come on here I know that one day & one way it will work.
Hello to Steph - I'm a newbie to this thread also (new to the site as well) You've come to the right place here - I recommend it anyway.  Everyone's really helped me here.
Laura - I'm really sorry about your result.  Everything you've just said is exactly how I felt a couple of weeks ago and I'm sure we all know how your feeling but we all have our own way of dealing with it.  As soon as I got back from the hospital (when they told me there was no eggs to fertilise) I just went to bed & cried for days.  I didn't want any contact with anyone, I didn't see the point in getting out of bed & then I came on here and felt so much better - you were one of the people who helped.  It is a bit weird how I've felt like this many times but something always comes up to give you fresh hope again - you never know what's around the corner.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- didn't mean you need to get  alife, just meant don't get too stressed these next couple of days and try and enjoy being PUPO x get in your car and drive up to ours, dinner's almost ready and there's plenty to share.


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Hi there - sounds like you had 7 antrals on your scan...so still plenty to work with...And you are only 25... So even if u don't have less eggs, they would be of great quality so it's probably a matter of finding the right clinic to work with you... 

Laura 0 you tested way too early...

Girls - is there any way i can manipulate my period as fed up waiting all the way till Jan 12 to do my cycle... And Xmas is annoying timing wise...  I have some progesterone pessaries left over so I if i stick these in, would that do the trick.??


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## Swinny (Jul 10, 2007)

Laura – Its too early to test yet. Look at Mirra she tested very early and it was negative but then tested days later and it was BFP. I know how you’re feeling honey as this time 2 years ago I was pregnant too and its useless me saying relax and stay positive. Give yourself a break though. Go and get a big fat pizza and put your feet up. Big   from Manchester hun.

Merse – Hope you’re feeling a bit brighter chick. Brighton with the girlies sounds fab, if I were a bit closer I’d have joined you, could do with a blow out!!

My friend had exactly the same situation with her sis. Kate’s sis is a proper drama queen and when Kate couldn’t be around her whilst Emma was carrying her babay, Emma had their mother jumping through hoops and making Kate out to be the big bad witch for stying away. You have to do what’s right to protect yourself and if that’s putting some distance between you and your sis then so be it!! Don’t you be feeling bad  

Inc – Hopefully the LP will work for me and we’ll get to ET stage this time rather than being abandoned 9 days into the drugs like the last 2 attempts. That makes me feel better about the egg quality on the LP. Mr Kingsland was really enthusiastic about me going onto the LP and he knows his stuff so fingers crossed. Only one more day to get through before my appointment. 

Loubella – Hello. The only advice that I can give you is start taking DHEA (I got mine from a site called Biovea and I take 2 x 25mg daily) if you’re not already on it. Most of team PR are taking it and we’ve had some fab success stories with Mirra and Nicks. I also take Wheatgrass and all sorts of vitamins. So much so that I rattle after I’ve taken them all in the morning. Stay positive matey, just because we’re poor responders with low ovarian reserves doesn’t make it impossible.   

I am at Liverpool Womens too. Who is your consultant? I am under Mr Kingsland. Pin was treated at LWH too.

Odette – Hello sweetie  

Roozie   

Nicks – Good lord your bowels are moving, that’s a first isn’t it  

Steph – hello and welcome to team PR  

Emma – Hello my lovely in HK. Not long to FET now sweetie   

Pin –      Well done Mrs. What a whopper, bet she’s gorgeous. Can’t wait to see some piccies. 

Gabrielle – Only one more day and I’ll know whether we’re cooking with gas or being put on the back burner fro another month. Thanks for thinking about me.
You are going to be so much better after the surgery chuck.   

Had a mad week of trials and tribulations, my friend Kate who is 9 weeks with twins from IVF started losing a lot of blood on Tuesday so we were fearing the worst. All's well though as she's had a scan and both little heartbeats are safe and well. Then on Thursday my dad was taken to A&E with a suspected Heart attack. He's ok though and safely back home now waiting for further tests. With everyone else to worry about I haven't given my appointment a moments thought. 

Off to eat something lovely for my tea now as DH is back from Tesco.

Love ya lots like Jelly Tots

Sarah xxxx


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

I was originally under Mr Kingsland but somehow ended up with Mr Sharma.  I thought they didn't do SP there because they wouldn't change my cycle.  My DP insisted to our consultant that it was buserelin & when he said it wasn't that we just took his word for it but seems my DP could of been right - maybe I should ask for Mr Kingsland instead.  I've just this second purchased some DHEA - is there a certain day I should start taking it?  I did get some ovulex a few months back but that doesn't appear to be doing much.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Nope, Lou, just start taking it! It should pep up your egg quality anyway. I can't believe they didn't even consider tests or the short protocol for you - what a lot of money and heartache wasted  

If there's a more progressive doc there go for it - it must be easier doing these things closer to home.
I couldn't have - my close clinic has very poor success rates and wouldn't have got me pg.

Sarah - what a week you've had - Gawd. Bet you're glad that's all over. The only good thing is it's kept your mind off other things!

Inc - I took the pill - microgonyn - to manipulate my cycle. The onlt thing is that it doesn't go too well with DHEA for some people, including me. You only need to take it for two weeks before stopping four days before you want your AF to start.

Laura - that's the whole point of testing, to get that negative, then anything from here on is a definite positive - it's all about attitude! Do one tomorrow morning with the first wee, then ake Mon and Tues off and do the same - You have all good signs, despite them coming and going, so don't fret - it won't help anyway. Besides, I want my text to say you're up the duff! 

Karen, Gab - hello!

xxxxxxxxxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Loubella - didn't understand your comment about buserelin.... Did you think it affected the outcome of the cycle somehow...?

Mir... - why did you want to manipulate your cycle... Is it for the latest ttc?  Did you ask for the pills from the gp?  I used to take the same brand of bc some years ago...


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I had some left over from the Lister cycle, and wanted to make sure I came on exactly on the dot because I was flying to Turkey and didn't want to waste time. As it was I only just managed to get the embies in the day before the flight home, so - phew!


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Mir - was this self-administered or the dr asked you to take it?  And for how long did you take it?


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

yes we thought that the buserelin shut me down too much and that it sort of overpowered to menopur.  I had 7 follicles when I wasn't on a cycle yet my 1st cycle (2 amps) I had 2 small follicles so it was abandoned, 2nd (4amps) had 4 follicles - 2 eggs, 3rd (6 amps) 5 follicles - 3 eggs & finally 4th (8 amps) 3 follicles no eggs.  Still think its really odd - can't understand it at all.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Self administered - though I asked the clinic first if I could and the answer was yes, and to start from day 2.

Loubella - I think you'll have a very different cycle without the downregging - it does sound that way. I had one follicle after downregging on buserelin.


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Lou - was this on short protocols?


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

no was on long protocols - never had short protocol, I didn't even know short protocols existed until a couple of days ago when I came on here.  Seems I've been going around in circles - no wonder I felt so disheartened before I found this site.


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

I was on short protocol with buserelin and gonal f and wondered whether it suppressed me, too although the dr told me in my follow up that it suppresses at first and then it gives an oestrogen boost, but I just wandered whether an antagonist protocol may be better for poor responders whereby one uses fertility drugs + cetrotide to suppress ovulation without any downregging.  I suppose when you say you had 7 follicles before cycling you mean on antral follicle scan?  Are you going to try short protocol now?  I also had no eggs on my last attempt although had good lining and good oestrogen levels.  The dr said that the eggs must have been stuck to follicle walls and couln't be extracted and that empty follicles don't exist as such....  Dr Sher on Sirm board seems to be of the same opinion... 

Just asked dh about filling in donor forms as a back up and he is walking up and down in total agony... Eventually said yes, but I have to do it, which is so fair that I am speechless...   . We had a long chat last night about it all and still none the wiser...

Laura - are you feeling a bit better... Don't forget what Mir said about pee sticks!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

I'm not upset about my pee stik, I'm upset as I have no symptoms.  Exactly the same as last time.  About this time last cycle I lost my symptoms and got AF pains and then Af! 

I will test in the morning, with an early stick, its 85% accurate if used 2 days early.  But I know my bosy and have been preg before so I know how you feel and its not like this!!  

I'm not sure where we go or what we do from here. Not sure I can have more tx.

Sorry for my 4th 'me' post!
XX


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

you could be right with your theory - I just think that the less drugs I take the better so think I'd prefer to try this natural ivf, if not definately will be trying short protocol next time.  I only found out in August about me having the 7 follicles when I went to Oxford to see if we could try IVM and although they refused he gave me what I only know as a baseline scan (as wasn't sure what you meant by antral follicle scan).  Are you considering using an egg donor? - I have.  Was actually going to do it then dr said there isn't any on the list and I would have to find my own donor - don't even know where to begin.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I think buserelin is the work of the devil actually! I'd never have it again after that first time - evil, i tells ya.

Laura - *spanks* now stop it with all this navel gazing amd boob prodding and scrab! I find I only get symptoms when I'm up and doing stuff - which is why I had my worst pains at work (and thought I was miscarrying). When I get up in the morning I have no symptoms - and you haven't got up at all today! So you won't have symptoms, in my book. My boobs aren't sore unless I cram them into a bra and do stuff. Then they're very sore, but not when I first get up.

You haven't lost your symptoms - you just haven't got out of bed!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

baseline and antral follicle count is the same thing.. I am at the Create clinic where they do natural ivfs.  I have gathered from people who have had success at the clinic that they all had mildly stimulated cycles where the quality of eggs is preserved but you still aim to get from 2-7 eggs depending on how you respond to drugs... I would say with 7 antral follicles you would probably get good 4 or 5 at least... Antral follicles tell you how many follicles you work with in that cycle.  I think the lp suppressed you too much hence lesser follicle count... But with a different protocol you would roughly get the no of follicles seen on your baseline scan.  

Also an interesting finding from people who did aggressively stimulated cycles... They got the same response in terms of egg numbers with mild stimulation...  So the jury is out there... Sadly  I have v. v. low chances as nearly run out of eggs but I think with your age + antral follicle count your chances are not bad at all.  I certainly wouldn't even think of donor eggs in your situation...

DH is calling me so have to go...


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra - Just had a bath and tim came in and told me boobs have shrunk!  Then went to the offie!  I'd be happy if they hurt just when I prod them but not even that.  Anyway will test in the morning and that will be the end of your positivity then won't it my girl!  I'll show you!

Inc - How much was a min stim cycle at CREATE?  Do you like them?  You seem to have lots of concerns about them but I'm not sure other than donor what we can do.  I mean including all the extras they throwat you.  

Lou - So have you made any plans yet?

Merse - I wish I was in Brighton getting drunk with you!!! 

Hi to the rest of the gang.

XX


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- tell him to make you a  nice drink and then come and watch x-factor with us, as for telling you that your boobs have shrunk, he's a man, they look the same


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Eh? What IS it with that man?   ******! No word of a lie though, mine shrink back when I've been lying down for a while. They just don't hurt when I get out of bed.

Tomorrow is still four days early - or two days early really - there's no sense in thinking anything yet. Grade One Tilly may well still be making herself comfortable enough to produce the required 25HCG.

Now - *boxes Laura's ears* - enough of that. Go scrab!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

Was going to make an appointment with leeds to see about natural ivf but think it might be a good idea to wait until I get a copy of my casenotes from Liverpool before I make any definate plans.  Will defo be having another cycle next year and it definately won't be the same as before.  What is it about trying that makes you feel better?  Even when your certain it won't work it still makes you happier.  Need to start saving again now though so don't know when it'll be next year but DHEA on it's way so that should keep me going for a bit.


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Laura -  Geeta and Prof Campbell are fantastic...Especially prof Campbell.  He is a lovely old chap...so kind and competent...They have also got fantastic equipment where you can see the blood flow to the uterus... Lee, the nurse, whilst v. competent has a crap personality and she is virtually in charge as both Geeta and Prof still work for the NHS and Geeta is too busy to return calls.... She never ever did apart from when i had no eggs.  She did call me then, but I was in bed hiding under the duvet and didn't hear my mobile ringing.... You do get 2 scans only.  The price, however, is £2500 for icsi stimulated cycle (+ meds - paid about £700,but can be sourced for less via Fazeley - doubly cheaper) and with my prospects of success is not worth paying £6-7 k or more at the ARGC. 8 k it cost me and still paying it off... 

Also some people with low antral follicle count ie. Welshbird, for example, had a success... She produced 3 follies on 150 gonal f and succeeded...They also charge separately for pre-ivf scan which is now £200.  I think that you should definitely have a few more goes with own eggs... You can have 3 cycles at Geeta's for the price of a regular ivf... 3 follies is enough and your quality will be v. good.  Based on my own experience I haven't produced more eggs on more stimulation... In Jan last year I had 4 follies on 450 iu and 3 follies on 600 4 months later... 

I think it would be well worth trying...  There is also the option of Jinamed of course...

My Jan cycle will be the last one for me, methinks.

Let's hope that Tilly hangs onto the mother ship... There is no reason not to...  It was a fantastic embie... First class and it does take only one my girl... Chin up.... It was far too early to test anyway...


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Are you definitely going back to Geeta in Jan then Inc? It's nice when you've made a decision - feels like you can move on.

Lou - your case notes will be so helpful. You can really get to the bottom of it then. Then you can find success stories based on your own stats and go from there.

xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I'm on my second glass of red!

Boobs not sore still.

Gonna go watch CSI and test in the morning. We have had the 'what next' discussion.. no decisions yet though.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- try and get a good nights sleep and fingers crossed for tomorrow, what time are you testing x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Aw Laura, I hope you wake with the sorest knockers ever. And get a positive. However I've known loads of women on here test two days early - a few now pg with TWINS - who got a neg two days early. So until Tuesday there's no telling. Remember, the sore boobs went away then came back. Make yourself do some stuff tomorrow - they'll come back.

karen and you must SCRAB before I go to bed. I need my scrabby itch scratched!

xxxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Just had a massive row with dh again... about the same thing - why we didn't start trying for kids earlier...  Tomorrow is really the D-day to fill in the questionnaire for the Reprofit, hence the row, methinks... He agreed yesterday that I can fill in the questionnaire but I would have to take all the responsibility for my feelings and if anything goes wrong and etc.. Also he said that he can't promise that he won't disappear after a few months and so on... 

We went to visit friends tonight who have got a sweet 5 yr old and I think she is the reason for the row tonight and the same old discussion... Why did I have to do my Master's and so on... My dh is a control freak but in a passive aggressive sort of way... and I hated the way he tried to control me  and maybe I was running away from him ...hence I didn't want children earlier... I don't know...  Anyhoo.. I did start my Master's when I was 34 and when I was 35 I said I wanted to have children but he used protection everytime he slept with me...And now he is giving me all the **** where was I earlier and why I didn't want to have children...

I don't know where we go from here, but this doesn't look or sound like a healthy relationship at all...and not sure that it's a good scenario for donor eggs nor even further treatment...however hopeless... He is behaving like a little kid who is angry with the whole world and we are both equally to blame for the situation we are in, plus we have been unlucky on top.... I don't need to deal with this **** on top of my infertility...


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Typical man - always needs someone else to blame! That's why they're always made managers, the chaps.

Where are you in all this, Inc? Are you pretty resilient? I know I would be in floods - and I was a year ago when my DH was saying similar things to me. He's come a long way!

Thing is, what on earth is the point of him saying that? It strikes me he's trying to make you feel bad to see if it will make him feel better. It's not as if either of you have a Tardis, so he has to move forward the same as you're trying to do.

As for saying he might be a complete pr*ck for the next cycle - well, it's time to bring him up short. YOU might not be there forever, if that's the way he's behaving - he needs to know that. Then leave him to stew, silly sod. Once they get into that sort of childish, petulant crap you can't talk to them - I've tried and failed many times!

talk to us instead. And have a glass of red.

xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Shame I have no red ... We have argued so much about the same old thing since the donor egg speech in Jan that it doesn't affect me in the same way anymore... We both wanted kids just at the slightly different time ...And what has happened to us is sad and unfortunate without all this **** and self-destruction... We both contributed in our different ways to this sad saga and we also received crap advise on the NHS... Anyhoo, blame game won't help us now so it is a senseless thing all these rows...  
If my dh wanted a child so desperately as he says he did he should have either fought for it or he  could have left me and found somebody else... Anyhoo... he now says I destroyed his life.... 

I think I will seek counselling on Monday...This is too self-destructive for both of us... We are both hurting but this is not the way to deal with this...


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Inc - How are you honey?  Men!!  I tell you i'm sure its easier if your just using donor sperm!

Mirra- I'm off to sleep and praying for sore knockers on waking and a BFP.  

Night night girls


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- did you test this morning?

Mir- are you still planning on shopping today?

Inc-   - it's not your fault that things have turned out like this, if we all knew the future then life would be a doddle.  

Merse-hope you're enjoying Brighton

HIya to everyone else, sorry no more personals but just woke up and in middle of cleaning bathroom, need to decide what to do today x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Well I just texted my shopping buddy to say are you sure you want to go in this weather! Hopefully she won't - it's pure horrible out there. The very thought of going in and out of shops, wet and steaming - ugh, think it'll make me ill.

Laura - have you tested? Are you there? Remember you have two more test days at least to go!

Inc - counselling seems like a good way forward. Can you get DH to go with you? I'm guessing he can't see there's anything wrong with his behaviour, lashing out all the time when you're going through this together.

xxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Afternoon Mir- isn't it just so miserable outside, we're only popping out to put some flowers on my nan's grave and go and see his dad's grave, it was his birthday on FRiday so I took flowers but Alex was at work so is going today. Going to wrap pressies this pm...


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Bah - you're so prepared! I was going to get some pressies today, but sod going out in that weather - I'll get ill! I'll get the nail bar for my neice tomorrow lunchtime - that was only thing I was sure about getting anyway. And I'll think about my parents next weekend.

I think my DH has gone car booting! Can't believe it! He needs a rope to hoist the engine back into the car, so doubtless he'll have given up and gone to halfords by now.

Just remembered I have to tax my car and can't find the leaflet thingy they sent me! Argh! May have to try to do it anyway.

What a miserable day for visiting a grave - rain makes me feel sad anyway.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Mir- you can tax online now, have you tried that?

Not overly organised, I'm sure there's something I've forgotten, we've less people to buy for each year apart from friends who have babies but that's easy. x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

That's what I was going to do, but I can't find the thing with the code on it they sent me!


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Afternoon Ladies.....

Well have managed to get the big bush to behave itself in our front room...but its still shedding...not sure if this is right because it said very good needle retention on the label... ........If it keeps doing it we will have to go and speak to someone...worried about ds and dogs...just need to be careful.....

How is everyone....Mir your Pete is loopy....I thought it was only mad me that suggested car booting in this weather..... ...you are right rain makes me feel sad too...winter does anyway...I love the sun....we have to venture out for a little while today...  ....but hopefully wont be too long...xx 

Laura - How are we this morning...sending you lots of.....     and      ...remember its not official test day so you dont know the true result yet.....xxxxx

Inc - Im really sorry you are going through all of this...but its like Beach said...we dont know what the future will hold and if we did then ofcourse we would do things differently...I know my situation is different from yours but you know something I didnt know I would still be ttc a sibling for ds for over ten years..now ...had I known this I would have done IVF long time ago when I was younger...but I didnt know this then, nobody does....Im beginning to not blame myself for that now.(It took a while but Im getting better now)..I want to say to your dh try not to blame each other ...its noone's fault its just nature none of us, even the docs knows why these things happen or dont...Counselling is a good idea...(didnt work for us or my dh as he is quite headstrung)....but you are right you and dh need to sort this out between you first, be friends...I know its an expensive time..but could you not go away for the weekend and be on neutral ground and try and talk things through...like Ive said before..If you are not friends it makes the whole process a lot more difficult...really hope you can sort things out honey.....  

Merse - are you sober yet....? ...hope you had a nice time...

Beach - Hope things go ok today thinking of you honey....? ..not got time for a lot of personals....going out now...will catch up later...didnt see x factor last night...but so chuffed Hope is out.....(saw results show)...!.. 

lol..to you all.....


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Hello girls


Laura - have you tested again?  Hope you get a big fat positive...   

Gab - no chance of us doing counselling together as DH doesn't believe in it...Considers himself too clever for counselling... Shame about the tree...  Still it's nice to have a Xmas tree

Beach - omg - You are always so early...  Envy your energy must say....

Mir - agree - poo day for shopping...  HOw is Bob?  

Thx for your comments... DH has done a disappearing act without telling me where he was going as I was still sleeping in a separate bedroom, needless to say....


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Well As you have prob guessed I got a BFN, I know its not test day but it was an expensive early test so I've worked out if I was just under the HCG to get a BFP this mornign then it still wouldn't be up to  the correct level by tues.  I know there is still a incy wincy chance but I'm not a lucky person.  I will tell you some facts....

0.5% of pregnancies result in ectopic - Me
Only 15% of people who have ectopics don't go on to get preg in the following 18 months - Me
In my age group only 4 % of people don't get preg after 3 cycles of IVF - Me

As you can see my track record for being in the 'lucky percent' is ****.  So i'm not getting my hopes up.

We are meant to be going to dinner with Tim's mother today as she is down from Notts but Tim told her I have flu!  I told him to say migraine, she has called about 4 times this morning and he is out and I can't answer as I haven't got a cold and not sure I can put on a 'cold'.

Also I ran out to give tim something as he was going to the laundette and can you believe he was in his car smoking!    I feel like his mother and he has to hide his naughty habits from me!!

Inc - How are you this morning a stim cycle is more than I thought it would be actually.  But still an option.

merse - Hope your having a fab weekend. 

Beach  -  

Gab - I am going to pick up my Christmas tree later (only a plastic little one) from my dads and  put it up I think.  I love Christmas and am not going to let another 'no baby' Christmas ruin my fun.

Mir - Tax on line is great!  If you can't find your number I'm sure you can put your reg number in and do a search but I may be wrong.  Thing with the internet is that you really don't need to ever go out.  I've not left the flat since I got home at 4pm friday!  Really must get our today.

Rooz - You on face book yet?

Nicks - Hows you and bump... do you not have a pet name for bump? 

Who have I missed?

I bet i've missd the next person who posts!!


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Hi LB - sorry about your test - still too early to be sure but I know you still feel negative. Was it a proper 6 hour without a wee sample?   Not everyone picks it up that early. Keep testing please!  
Still got awful cold. Not going to work tomorrow. I've not been out of the house since 2pm Fri!! Managed to do Sainsburys shop though and a few clothes without getting wet!  
Loub - just about the DHEA - I know the decision is up to you and most of us IF'ers will do anything that might help but there isn't much research even in my age group (knocking on!) and there are no reports in your age group. DHEA is naturally occuring in us and gets less as you get older hence the logic in treating us oldies but you might not actually be deficient at your age. I suspect if you mention it to your GP or IF consultant here they will either not have heard of it or dismiss it. All I would say is read as much as you can about it and make your own mind up. Our younger ones on here have taken a reduced dose.
Mirra - did you brave the weather in the end?   
Gabs - not even thinking about xmas trees yet - am a bit of a 'bah humbug' over xmas.  
Inc - sorry things are not good hun. Here's some fairy dust in the hope that your luck changes next year  
Beach - what's for Sunday lunch in the Beachy household?   DH is doing chicken Kievs
Love to all you others   
Nicks


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Nicks it wa a good 8 hour wee sample!!  Was desperate for a week but too scared to actually go and do it!! 

Tim wants to have another go somewhere else but well, in 3 rounds of IVF we have got 3 embies, only one of them a 4 cell.  So I'm not so sure.  I think maybe its time we accepted it won't happen with my eggs and think of donor.


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- back now so can talk, I know you're not ok and feeling really fed up so jsut to say here for you whatever you need  x


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

LB - its hard to decide what to do I know as its so much effort all to produce 1 embie. Its not all over yet though  
just find out from the hosp whether the eggs you got were from those big follies - didn't you have 2 that were pretty big? maybe they got over ripe? After all you seemed to produce decent number of follies this time didn't you.   
NW


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Karen  - Thanks hon.  I just don't know what to do.  I feel like curling up in a ball and never getting up again.  I hate everything about my me and my life.  

Nicks - I had 3 that were really big and 3 that were about 12 on my last scan.  I worry too that by big ones were over cooked.  Thing is I will have to wait about 3 month for my follow up and I really would like to have a plan in place before then.

XX


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I think it's time to just do it differently - I found that by going on holiday I could take it easy and not worry about all the rubbish bits of tx. I really enjoyed myself in fact. I only got one embie last time and it was only grade 3, and I know that most of that was stress and lack of preparation.

PLUS - the chaps are much more involved if you're abroad - they get to concentrate on you more, without all the normal niggles. The Lister tx nearly killed us - all the travelling and working and stress. But eating out every night, being really romantic and shagtastic... it all helps get your gametes in tip-top order you know - I'm sure of it.

have a look at the Jinemed, Barcelona and Reprofit and if it's really not positive by Tuesday, book up - you'll feel better at a stroke.

BTW, I peed in a pot each time, so I had a good half hour befoere I had to do the biz in the morning. It's far too stressy to wee directly on to it. AND, when I did the two days early test I tested at 6.30am and the line wasn't really there - I threw the test away and went back to bed. I tested again at 9.30am and it was positive! They were both First Response, too.
So you see, even a few hours this early can make a huge difference.

Love to everyone!

xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- I do know what you mean about feeling worthless, after my second tx I felt like my world had caved in and still do sometimes,  I lost all my confidence and am only just starting to get it back now.  Mir had a good idea of changing tactic and getting away and having tx abroad, gettting rid of all your stress and worries about travelling to the clinic, taking time off work etc.

What about having some time off work?  COuld you take a sabbatical leave?  When are you due back?

And I know that I'm still being positive but you've still got a few days to test....you really can't give just yet hon x


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## Guest (Dec 2, 2007)

Laura - I'm sorry the test was negative but as Mira has already said, it could be too early    for your test tomorrow.  The girls are right...you could do with a change of scene re tx.  There seem to be some great clinics in Europe that do DE if that's what you decide upon.  

Hi to everyone else.  Just off to bed...


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra - I like the idea of Turkey but I really want to get going again before April as I have 3 weeks leave left for this year and we won't be able to afford a holiday if we are going to have another go at IVF.  And  don't really like Turkey as a country at the best of times especially Istanbul and so spendig 3 weeks there in the cold sounds a bit grim!  I've had a look at other places but i remember from before most are suggesting donor for me so certainly after this cycle as well they would say donor.

Maybe I should email the consultant and ask her some questions about my cycle before I make any decisons.

Also my other FF went to Turkey and hated it, she said it was really stresful being in a hotel room and not at home.  Thats another worry all my pets!  I wouldn't be brave enough to go out there on my own to start with so we would have to find them a carer for 3 weeks.

Oh I don't know what to do.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Emma -  the thing with DE abroad is its annonymous and I'm not sure if that is far to have a child who will never be able to get info on its genetic parents.  Not sure I'm quite there yet.  I would do donor with my sister but I'm not convinced she really would actually do it.. shes a bit flakey.

Karen - I've already been back a week, I only took Ec/ET week off.  So back again tom, but thats fine, if I'm home I just get depressed.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I'm a real homebird too, but I loved it. I didn't even get that feeling of being desperate to go home I usually get on holiday. Oh, and I HATE cities, but for some reason was really chilled over there.
But then everyone's different.

My parents had all my critters - could you get someone to flatsit? 

Which clinics suggested donor for you? You know what I think anyway - i think that clinic overcooked three eggs and undercooked three. I don't suppose they'll give you another free go?

xxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura-duh- I forgot you'd gone back


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Laura - first of all you tested far too early....

Secondly, it's not time to think of donors yet....

Thirdly, you have to pick a clinic where you would feel good.... For some people it's good to go abroad, and for some it can be scarey ....

Another idea is you can check the LFC - this is where Geeta has her patients for egg collection.. V. intimate and small place, but prof Craft is one of the leading people in the country and one of IVF's pioneers.... V. attentive staff... Their prices are comparable to other clinics, though.... 3k ivf , 1k icsi + meds.  Geeta's natural cycle is cheaper £ 1340 and EC £ 350, but I think stimulated cycle gives you a better chance if you produce at least 2 eggs...(2.2 k for stimulated ivf and 2.5 for stimulated icsi, which is still a lot less than elsewhere).   

Your eggs are of a good quality, so you need to focus on this... You don't have to get loads... 2 or 3 eggs is all you need per treatment cycle.   

DH came back and is reading a story about a lady who conceived using donor eggs (written by Safari girl...) that I left downstairs A v. inspirational story, indeed...

Nicki, Gab, Beach - thank you all for your kind words... I hope you are having a nice weekend...


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well they might. At my last consult they offered another free cycle and I just had to fund the drugs, then they called and said my PCT had changed its criteria and I got another free cycle including drugs.  So in theory I could ask them for that free cycle now!!    Then if that didn't work I would be able to go to Turkey in the begining of the summer!

Am I just kidding myself though?  Maybe I should just move on and not toture myself any more?

Inc - I think I need to think very carefully about my next move.  This will now be our 4th IVF, I'm feeling like a mad person.  We promised we would stop at 3.  Although Tim seems to have forgotten that!


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

it's not that easy to get off the rollercoaster and to give up on your genes girl... So, put together a list of clinics and do pros and cons... and then try to make a decision... Take a little break, too .. This is of course if the test turns out to be negative...

I agree with Miranda that you probably get more attention abroad... On the toher hand, not all clinics abroad do only donor eggs.  Many ladies go for treatment with own eggs...  There is a wl at the reprofit I hear... It's also about what feels good for you and Tim... who sounds a bit like dh in a lot of ways....


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

The other thing I've thought of is, I didn't stay in my hotel room because I had Helen there. If you have someone to go over with it can be a real laugh. When are you going, Gab?

Or just hook up with one of the girls on the Jinemed/Barcelona/Reprofit threads. I don't know how it would have been if I hadn't hooked up with her - maybe it would have been lonely. But why stay in your hotel room? I don't get it! You only have half an hour at the hospital each day, and you choose the time, so you can do what you like with the rest of the time.

We spent all our time shopping, eating and having lashings of red wine in various places - bliss!

I had another English woman in my hotel, too  we were picked up at the airport together. The last thing I was was lonely, plus I had all you lot on the laptop.

That's the answer - go abroad, but make sure you meet up with someone. It might be best to wait till summer anyway - give yourself a proper break and do it when the sun's shining.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

Hi everybody,

Nicks - thanks for your concern about dhea - as soon as it arrives will be going to drs to discuss it, always get a very numb response when it comes to the infertility problems but will mention testing testosterone so hopefully they'll go along with that.  Will probably be back & to on here though.  I know it's probably not going to directly work for me but if I could just get 1 embie for next cycle then that'll make me loads happier so I need something thats going to make my eggs go for a workout. 
Laura - I really feel for you at the moment and everything your saying at the moment I can relate to.  I'm actually glad you said you wouldn't go abroad because you don't want to leave your pets.  Everyone thinks we're nutters because we've got 2 dogs and not been on holiday in 8 years but for me I get that worked up about being away from them it ends up more stressful so I can understand where you coming from there.  I know your feeling really down at the moment but I've only had 1 embie in 4 cycles and never even got to the pregnancy test stage - had my AF 10 days later.  I too considered donor eggs but I'm still going to keep trying with my own for the time being - don't give up.  There's nothing anyone can say that'll make you feel better but when I get like that I always think that getting upset makes it worse - if you think you'll fail, chances are you probably will - that's my general moto for life.   
Mir - Don't tax you car online - it's true it's the best thing since sliced bread but if the police pull you over and there's no tax disc in the window then you could end up having you car took to the compound.  It does depend what the police are like in your area but you wouldn't get away with it where I live so just thought i'd mention it.
Inc -  Are you feeling better now?  You know I don't think it really matters how old you are when you get on this rollercoaster - I used to.  I wanted kids from the days when everyone else was choosing their options at school for their perfect career.  I didn't want to waste any time I already thought the road was too long and that was when I thought IVF would work 1st time but my DP didn't think the drs would take us seriously if we started so young (he was right - again) then finally when they do they say "your body thinks your 40 & you could go through the menopause, your only option is donor eggs" so we often asked ourselves why we even bothered with contraception - at all.  Was being a teenage parent really so bad?  So I suppose we always think there's something we could have done differently, truth is though it doesn't matter.  What I'm trying to say is that say I would have waited until I was 40 then I had exactly the same response - without a doubt I'd probably blame my age too but the fact is it's not my age is it.  

p.s I'm sorry this has ended up so long


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls I'm back had a fab time! Far too much to drink but had a good giggle and danced till 4am!! Not bad for a 37 year old!! Feel so much better and AF wasn't too bad either not much pain at all!! So got to phone the clinic tom to get a scan to see if I need another opp!
Laura you are testing early hon hoping it changes for you  
Hi to everyone else, far too much gone on for me to catch up on it all!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Welcome back Merse - I love Brighton. Did you get any shopping done?  Bet it was heaving down there.

Lou - Thanks hon, I know I'm just being a moody moo today (and yesterday) but its always hard even if your expecting it.    As for Fur Babies, I think we all have them on here and they are the world to us, its a good thing shows your compassionate and loving.  

Mirra - I'm not sure I could travel to Turkey on my own even if i was meeting people there, I've had a bit of a bad experience with muslim men and so get a bit freaked with there flirting etc.  

I'm ok, tim is just cooking us s curry and then we are going to watch Elf, I love kids Christmas films!  

Work tom, can't believe I've not left the flat since Friday 4pm! Thats terrible isn't it.  Have work monday so at least I'll be up and about and busy.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Not a lot of shopping going on Laura more dinking eating and laughing really!! Oh and lots of dancing! 
Work will be good for you it takes your mind off things! 
xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Yeah, the flirting can be hard to take! Helen was more bothered by it than me - I simply didn't notice much of it! La la la...

So, its' going to be this country and  near enough so you don't have to leave the critters. That narrows it down - see, you're so close to making a decision already!

Just keep your pecker up for another couple of days though hen - it's too damn early to break open the vodka yet.

Welcome back Merse! Sounds like you had a great time!

Lou - the DVLA site's been down all day!   I'll have to go to a post office tomorrow...

xxxx


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## loubella (Nov 29, 2007)

me too Mir, and Laura you're not being a moody moo but I do think that your thinking the worse because you want to prepare yourself for bad news, it doen't matter what you do it'll still feel the same so best to have a PMA.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Merse - Welcome back sweetheart, glad you had a nice time....I think you did pretty well matey Im usually yawning by 11 oclock...( told you I was a light weight)....best medicine is laughter...xxxxxx

Laura - Work may be good for you, It will do you good to get you out, I know I was going   during my 2ww....Im sorry that you are not feeling as positive...Its always the same during the 2ww...sending some...    ...hope you feel better soon...Its not over till its over, mind...ok.....xxxxxxx

Hello to Loubella...... 

Mir - What are you up to tonight....I away to get ready for LONG day tomorrow...will try and get on later, if not take extra special care everyone....and..... ....if you are testing tomorrow....Laura....


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Not much, as usual, Gab! bath, reading, crap TV, scrab and FF.

Please, will someone scrab with me?   HOURS it's been, since someone had a turn...


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Just been Mir xx


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I've been too! Thanks Merse.

xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Me and tim are having a competition, anyone wanna join in.  On tv is the 100 best family films, we have written down what we think will be  in the top 10. Go on Mirra, that'll keep you busy!!

I so hope I am proved wrong about being preg, but I can't see how I can be now. Anyway will test now Thurs as no point testing everyday when I know the result.  Unless of course I get some symptoms.

Mirra-  No I'm not ruling out abroad i would just want tim to come with me, I wouldn't go on my own.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I don't watch films! I only read books, I'm afraid. I just get so peed off with the continuity (is that the right word?) - things like them smoking a *** and next minute it's longer, you know the sort of thing. I laugh at horror films! They scream, I laugh, DH (who's been watching it perfectly content) gets brassed off - it's not good.

The only ones I like are ancient musicals, like Jesus Christ Superstar, Mary Poppins, Grease, etc. Even then - pah, I'd rather read. I've never watched a James Bond all the way through - can you believe it?

My favourite is The Sleeper - Woody Allen, and Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask) - also Woody Allen. I reckon the second one could be in the top ten, but I'm hopelessly out of touch. Maybe Jaws? Chariots of Fire? You can see how out of date I am.

I liked Dead Poets Society! Anything with Robin Williams is usually good - oh, and The Graduate, because Pete looked like that when I met him. Dustin's aged better than him! The Graduate might make it into the top ten.

I simply don't know! I'm rubbish at films!

Can you scrab? I'm better at scrabbing!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Mirra-I've scrabbed.  You thought of enough considering you don'tlike films... I'mthe opposite I watch films a few times a week, not a big tv girl.  I like reading but seem to have gone off it lately, have started about 6 books and not finished them.

Mary poppins is in my top ten... surely has to be.  Its only family films so not sure that includes James Bond!    And I've never watched one either!

Got another headache... think its AF trying to arrive but being stopped.


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

I've been having headaches this week too. Hope it's not that!

Yes, I'm watching that film thing now - looking for my faves! Willy Wonka has to be there, surely? My favourite of all time I think. But they're all really old my faves!

I'm trying to scrab now - brain's not having it!

xx


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## roozie (Mar 25, 2007)

hiya  

will post more tomorrow, but just wanted to say i'm thinking of you LB.   Don't write this one off yet... must be so hard, i know, but hang in there hun'. Sending you oodles of          .

Congrats also to Pin of course.... wow, what a weight. Ouch!

Rooz xx


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Good - you've posted! We can all relax now, knowing our PR triplets are safe. xxxxxxx

ET - of course! Was Willy Wonka anywhere in the top ten? Mary Poppins was third, I'm glad to see.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Yeah chalie and the choc factory was topten.  

Got early start tom so off to bed... got bad AF pains.  

Night my loves. XX


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Laura - fingers crossed for testing tomorrow... You sound a wee bit better and Tim sounds good as well...

Rooz - hope your trio is OK and you are feeling OK, too...  

Mir - how is your bump?  
Is it showing now?  

Merse - great that you have had a good time...

Gab -  you are the calming voice on this thread... You are so lucky to have your boy....always think of that when the going gets tough...

Guys..- I filled in the Reprofit questionnaire and then cried and cried and cried and looked at my photo albums and didn't have the guts to send it...


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- thinking of you x


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Oh goodie! Top ten!

I hope the pains don't turn into AF - keeping everything crossed for you. xx

Aww, Inc - it's a big step. Give yourself time.  

Morning Karen!

xxxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Morning girls  
Am off sick today with horrendous cold that DH gave me. sneezing, sore throat and snotty  
Mirra - how are you? 10 weeks already!   Got date for 12 weeks scan yet?  
Rooz - glad you are OK - 24+5 according to my conversion factor on my own dates -   
Inc   Its hard hun.  
LB - hope you are OK   and that AF hasn't appeared  
Morning Beach  
Just checked the telly and Homes under the Hammer isn't on - what's a sick girl meant to do?   
Loubs - glad you have a positive thinking plan   
Told a few more family last night - amazing how it still hurts emotionally as there is all the unsaid stuff where they know you have tried for a few years and then the helpful comments like 'I just had to look at my wife and she was pregnant'. I suppose that IF sensitivity will be something we never lose but at least we will all always be respectful to others about it. Sorry for waffle!  
Well I'll go and see if the postman has come......
Love to all 
Nikcs


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## Guest (Dec 3, 2007)

Nicks - Hope you feel better soon.  It must be frustrating 'cause you're limited over what you can take as you're preggers.  People who haven't had IF just don't understand how hard it is emotionally.  They thing that just because you're preggers now you've forgotten the last three years of heartache, blood, sweat and tears.    

Laura - Good luck if you're testing again today   

Hi to everyone else  

Just had our Christmas tree delivered and it's bl**dy huge!  I thought it was going to be 5ft but it clears me by about 2ft and I'm 5'6"!  Might have to go and buy some more decs for it!


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## odette (Nov 3, 2006)

Laura

   

Whatever will be will be, please remember we all love you!  

Odettexxxxxx
and all the gang


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls,
Inc its a big step give yourself time  
Laura hows your head today? 
Nicks hope you feel better soon 
Emma can you actually get round your tree? 
Beach,Mir,Odette,Rooz,gab,Linz,Lou,Pin and Babs hello 
Wish I could cheer up sick of being a miserable *****! Phoned clinic this morn got a scan next Mon to check endo! Made me cry just phoning them again!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Merse


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanks Beach I need that today! xxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Merse - what are your ttc plans?  

Nick - thx.  It's weird I guess how people have no comprehension of if... Must say I didn't either until it happen to me... 

Laura - hope you are OK...


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Are you working Merse?


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Beach I'm working this afternoon and eve I'm better when I'm working to be honest too much time to think when at home!
Inc don't really have any plans not sure what you do when you've been told IVF no longer an option!!!
I'd quite like someone to tell me what to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

That was one of the things that I was looking for when I went for counselling, wished that someone could have told me what i should be doing x


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Yes it's weird isn't it I just feel abandoned! xxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

You're not abandoned, we're all here for you


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanx yes it's a good job you are all there really!!  xxxxxx


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## odette (Nov 3, 2006)

merse



yes

we all are here for each other 



Odettexxxxxxxx


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanks Odette you girls are lovely! 
Just off to work now hopefully cheer me up a bit!
Lol to all xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 3, 2007)

Merse -


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## Swinny (Jul 10, 2007)

Hi Girls

Been crying all day long and I just can't seem to pull myself together. DH and I went for our appointment at liverpool this morning thinking that the worst that they were going to tell us is that we'd not be able to start in December and that it would be January. Oh how wrong can you be!!! My FSH was tested in October and because it was 13.8 (NHS cut off is 12 apparantly??) that means that we have now lost our right to NHS treatment. I fought so hard after the lousy treatment that we had at St Mary's and our PCT reviewed our case and moved us to Liverpool and what for......More time has moved on and now the three full attempts that I was granted have been snatched away. 

Mr Kingsland was lovely with me but bottom line is that he is the 5th consultant to tell me that its not going to work using my own eggs and that he strongly recommends that we pay privately for a donor cycle now. I feel so so sad. 

I've now got to write to CARE and get on their donor egg waiting list which will be another 6-9 months of waiting. My whole life for the past 4 years has been one wait after another.  

DH was his usual passive self when we got back. He cuddled me in the appointment and I could see that he was upset, but it only feels like he's upset to see me hurting and that it doesn't actually hurt him when we are given bad news time after time. Its weird, its as though it isn't really happening to him. The first thing he did when we got home was go and check his work emails. F*** work, we need to sit and talk. God I get so bl**dy angry with him. Its as though I have to make all of the decisions. He just says we'll do whatever you want to do. I need him to tell me exactly what he's thinking so that we can make the decisions together, I'm sick of going this alone!!

Part of me wants to go back to CARE and pay for an attempt privately so that I can lay it to rest before I go down the donor egg route. 

Sorry this is a total me rant, but I am feeling so very desperate and low. I really feel like I am at the end of my tether with the whole thing.

Sarah x


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Swinny - Definitely do one more attempt before you go onto donor... As long as you have what ifs - you should do it if nothing else for closure... And you never know... Donor eggs is tough beyond belief and I am grappling with it and it's been a year since I was told I would need donor eggs... But then some consultants are more conservative than some others...

Say if I went to Geeta after my donor eggs speech, mild stimms would have been better for me than full whack stimms as I still produced 4 eggs then...and with some quality put in the equasion who knows...  It takes time the donor thing... It certainly is not a breeze as it sometimes appears or reads when people post on the boards here...And it's easier for some people to do than for some others... I know a girl who cycled at Geeta's and had fsh of 19 and she got pregnant at the Create... She was also given donor egg speech... But ironically, the ARGC wouldn't accept to treat her and she went to the Create and got pregnant at her first attempt...They don't measure FSH if you had treatments elsewhere...  I , on the other hand, got my fsh back to 4, cycled at the ARGC and 10 k later got a negative...  The Create go by the antral follicle count and if you have got 3 or 4 going you are a good candidate for mild stimulation.... And your eggs are unlike mine of good quality... So chip up girl....

I also find that my dh behaves similarly... But I know he is hurting a lot, too...

I have booked myself some counselling privately this time to clarify some issues and hopefully get myself to feel better.


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Swin - hun, sorry to hear that    Its not the end of the world though. NHS has limited resources and if they see you as a very low success rate you are a poor investment. But look at us all on here - we are all poor responders - Mirra and I have been lucky - my first 2 FSH's were 13 and 15. If you didn't pay for the first 2 SP's can you not just bite the bullet and get going? - after all you are all set. You never know your FSH might come down again - at least you have that card up your sleeve if you keep getting it checked. 
The month I conceived my FSH was still over 10 and when it was 15 I still managed 6 eggs. Its about NHS money - that's why they have said that today. i'm sure you should still have another go on the DHEA too   
Don't despair lovey - make a plan   Don't let the b*stards grind you down  
Love Nikcs


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Awww, you two - I don't know how I can console you. I know I wouldn't have gone on to donor eggs - even with my own I felt I couldn't handle one more tx, with all its attendant waiting and strain. So I really admire you both for considering it - what an unutterably tough decision to make.

That sounds like the worst appointment to handle, Sarah. I do admire your courage in battling it out with your own eggs. Like Inc said, if you have it in you for another go, make it one where you try to use your own eggs, and you get some closure. Or a baby! An FSH of 13 isn't the end of the world - you can work on that. Could they not give you a little time to get it down before withdrawing funding?

Your DH is trying to be strong for you, and not knowing what to do for the best, so at least that's good. It does fall to us to make the decisions - you'd hate it if he did actually make any decisions, but it would be nice if they appeared more involved in the decision-making process!!

I hope you manage to feel a bit stronger soon, - son't let this beat you! I know you won't. 

Nicks - it's weird how you still don't feel like a normal pregnant woman, isn't it? Like when people say rubbish like that and you're recoiling again.

Emma - whoo! for the tree! That sounds enORmous!

Merse, Beach - hello!

xxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Sarah-   in middle of making dinner but just wanted to give you a big hug


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

At work so only a quickie from me..

Sarah -   Bum bum bum!!  Bloody NHS! I think Inc has a good plan for you, do you ovulate each month?    I hope that you do decide to have another go, doesn't sound like your ready for donor just yet... but doesn't hurt to get you on the list anyway, can always pull out when you are preg!    As for FSH my other FF did egg sharing, yes egg sharing with a fsh of 13 and both her and recipient are expecting twins!  So what does that say!!

Merse -    I'm always at the end of th phone if you need me... I know your there for me! 

Nicks - How you feeling?  

Mirra, beach, gab, Inc, Odette, Floozie - Hello!

No testing from me today had an early start and only have ordinary tests indoors.. Maybe I will tomorrow.  No symptoms still but no Af either, although that doesn't really mean much as didn't get AF last time either til after i stopped cyclogest.  Hardly any AF pians today.

AND 2 people have announced they are preg today... Ah what a lovely day!  

Anyway think I'm getting a cold, I'm hot sore throat and so gonna face the packed tube now... joy.  

Chat later.


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## roozie (Mar 25, 2007)

...DH just allowed me out of bed for a little peep on here... roll o ngetting lap top sorted out then i can post 'til my heart's content.

     for you Sarah. I can imagine how upset your appt's made you feel - all that, on top of your dad's illness. I hope he's doing ok now..? Yes what they told you today must feel like a huge blow, but funding & timing issues aside, (which i'm not belittling) it hasn't fundamentally changed anything. Medically, nothing they said means you have to give up and immediately start considering donors. That's your call, not their's...you're still free to pursue tx with your own eggs, as many times as you feel is right for you until you're satisfied you've tried enough..? As Nicks said, your FSH is in the same range as other people's have been - other people who have gone on to get preggers with their own eggs. So you can too, if that's the way you choose to go. You obviously have a fighting spirit and i'm sure when you both most need it, your DH does too. Don't give up. We're here for you.   

LB - been thinking about you lots today. Praying for a result.     

Inc - hope you're feeling a bit less down today too? The counselling sounds like a +ve step forward anyway... any i dea when can you start?

Merse - did work lift your spirits a little bit? I hope so hun'...  Glad you've got your apppt sorted for nxt wk anyway. At least you can start moving things along and plan next steps. Glad Brighton was fun by the way.... it's a cool place, i love it. Had my hen do there in fact!

Em - hope the yucky PMT isn't dragging on still... any signs of AF yet? You're bound to feel some relief when it arrives, aren't you.  

Gabs - how are you today? Still feelign a bit brighter after that unofficial chat with the cons? Hope so. xx

Beach.. you been working today? What you up to?

Nicks.. sorry cold no better. Make sure you take it easy and look after the babba. x 

Belated welcome Steph -you've been managing to get grade 1 embies so there is definitely still light at the end of the tunnel....  

Hi to everyone else, my allotted time is running out, better get my **** back into bed! wouldn't it be ironic if i drop dead with DVT before i have a chance to give birth!! (shouldn't joke i guess)

Rooz xx


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## roozie (Mar 25, 2007)

just seen your post LB... good on ya for waiting. Will power girl!! x


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## Swinny (Jul 10, 2007)

Thanks girls, you are all so lovely and you're right, its not time to give up yet. I have just had a talk with DH and we're definitely going to give it another shot privately. 

Its never been about the money because I'd sell up and live in a tent if it meant that I'd get my much longed for baby. We'll just reign the spending in now and get on with making plans for a go privately in the new year. Going to have a lovely Birthday and Christmas and then worry about it all again in January. We're off to the lakes now at New Year so I've got something to look forward to.Think we both need a break.

Nicks - You're right, I know my FSH is shi*e, so nothing has really changed has it. Its just that the way they put it across to you, you feel like its hopeless and that if they're not willing to treat you, then what hope is there. I should be used to the chat by now, I've had it so many times. My friend Lou is getting the book Inconceivable over to me so that I can regroup and focus on postivity. I just feel like I've had the rug pulled from under me again that's all. I'll be fine tomorrow (apart from looking like I've been fighting with Ricky hatton).

Roozie - My dad is ok now thanks, but he's got to go back to see the cardiologist in 2 weeks, so hopefully they'll get to the bottom of things then.
Hope you and our precious triplets are ok  

Inc - Create sounds like a good option whereabouts is that? I have posted on a few of the other threads and saw you on there so I left you a message. Just want to get some more info on my options.

Laura - Glad that you've not tested today. I am willing your BFP for you.

Inc, Beach, Mirra, Nicks and Roozie thanks your support means a lot to me  


Sorry about the me, me ,me post and I hope you're all ok as I didn't ask earlier. Take care all of you.

Sarah xxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Laura- hope that the journey home wasn't too traumatic....

Rooz- he's taking very good care of you all....I;m ok thanks, work was fine, jsut finished dinner and now got an hour before bath and ready for bed, oh doesn;t time fly...

Sarah-next time will work, we'll both chant positive thoughts x


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## Swinny (Jul 10, 2007)

Thanks Beach...we will have babies, we will have babies, we will have babies xxx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Hi Rooz-  good to see you posting... HOw long have you got left?  Not sure.... Must be difficult being on bed rest if I understand correctly....

Nicks - strange what you say about being preggers...but totally understanble

Mir - our Miss positive...  Go on girl...   When is the next scan?  

Laura - good for the will power thing...

Hello everybody... A bit better me...  Trying to make some decisions... Booked counselling privately for next wk...  Funny enough the woman remembered me after nearly 5 years and I only had 3 sessions with her over my redundancy thing that was a rather nasty affair... What a memory, eh?  She also gave me a discounted rate so only £ 5 more expensive than what I paid all those years ago... V. no nonsense kind of woman, which I think may be good at the mo...


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi girls just a quickie from me as just got in from work! Poor clients was really quiet with them all today! but hopefully they know me well enough to see I was just a bit upset!
Sarah def give it another go hon you'll always be wondering what if if you don't  
Inc well done on booking counselling 
Rooz glad you are all still doin well 
Laura hon thinking of you lots and thanks, would you mind blubbering phone calls? 
Nicks hope you are feeling a bit better? 
Em thanks for the hug heres one for you 
Beach,Odette,Gab,Linz,Mir,Pin and everyone else hi xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Hiya Merse- how you feeling tonight?


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Bit better thanx Beach work helped a bit and being home with DH always makes me feel happier!
Hows you?
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

I'm shattered....came home from work and did cleaning, prepared dinner, did ironing, went to Tesco, cooked dinner then just sat down....off for a bath and bed soon x


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

You've been a busy girl! I'm ready for bed just had a prawn curry DH cooked, was lovely!
xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Where is everyone tonight


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Merse - I'm here! - glad you are feeling a bit better hun   Sorry about your bad day - hope tomorrow is better. Prawn curry sounds nice - we had lamb curry!  
Beach - you are such a house wife   Bet it was cordon bleu tea as well!   
Swins - NY plan sounds good    YOU WILL HAVE A BABY! 
inc - that's good about the counselling -not being ripped off for once is a change!  
LB - hope you are home from work safe  
Pin - OK you've had long enough now - we need the birth story   All the gory details!  

Just watched Nigella - makes me laugh with her fridge full of about 6 pints of cream and her instant potato cakes! Can't get enough of cookery programs at the moment.  You had any cravings MIrra? I have just started eating jam on toast   Not that I didn't like it before but it was always second choice to Marmite!  

love to all
NW


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi Nicks are you feeling better? x


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Nicks - can we see your bump, pls?


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Out of bath and now have 5 mins before taking a book to bed for a while....

Nicks- I did DH steak, chips and salad for dinner whilst I had chicken kiev, mushrooms, leeks and chips..didn't have a pudding as too late!


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Ive just lost a really long post   ....so will make this one quick.....

Nics - Hope you feel better soon honey...jam  

Mir - How are you this fine evening..... 

Merse -   ...for the scan honey..take care..xxx

Swinny - Have pm you...take care.... 

Odette -  ...yes more positive but dreading official one wed..... 

Roozie - big  ...for all 3.....xxx

Pin - thinking of you.....  

Jend - Hello..... 

Loubella - Hello...... 

Inc - Yes i do understand what you are saying..and i always remember everyday how i am so lucky and blessed to have my ds, i tell him this everyday too....I know I cant possibly understand or begin to understand what it feels like for a lot of women on this website...2nd IF does hurt too...I have been ttc a baby for over ten years now for a sibling for my ds. As well as hurt it carries with it a lot of guilt...Im starting gradually to work through this now...
I just wish I could wave a magic wand and make things better for everyone...we all have our stories and journeys to go through....
I just want to wish you all the luck with your treatment   ....

I just want to thank everyone for all your support over the last few months...it has helped me a lot more than counselling ever did...and I just hope I can be there for you all too, to support you like you have supported me....take extra special care my FF......ONE DAY AT A TIME........ ...Gab..


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Don't you just hate it whn that happens Gab x

Night all, off to bed, sweet dreams.


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Laura...my PUPO buddy....hanging in there.......     .....


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Night girlies I'm off to bed too  xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Beach - my friend....nite nite...delia..... ....sorry didnt mean to miss you off..take extra special care.........xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

me too....nite...nite....xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx....


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Good luck for your follow up... The book Inconceivable is all about 2ndary infertility...Have you read it?


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## *Lollipop* (Feb 1, 2007)

Not yet..but will keep it in mind...will try and have a look on Amazon.....going to sign off now...as on a long day tomorrow...take care Inc...catch up with you soon....xxxxx ....


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## Miranda7 (Feb 12, 2007)

Hi girls!

I'm going to bed in a mo, so I'll make this short - slept so badly last night!

Inc - yes, I do have quite a sizeable bump - I had one from six weeks. However I'm sure most of it's wind, as I get terrible IBS. The cramps today were something else! Often, all I do on my drive home is fart.
That's lovely about the discount for counselling! That's the sort of thing that makes life feel less daunting and a little bit sweeter I reckon.

Laura - how are you feeling?

Nicks - well i've been eating a lot more sweet things than usual, and fromage frais on EVERYTHING. Have you tried Wheat Crunchies with fromage frais? Or mixing it in with baked potato?  
Sorry to hear you're crook - hopefully it'll be a nice relaxing few days off work with the telly rather than feeling completely ghastly!

Gab - The best of British with your follow-up. I do hope it makes you feel listened to and as if you've got through to them.  

Aha! Just noticed why the appearance of FF has changed - there's snowflakes in the pink lines!

Rooz - hello! Yes, we need to get you on a laptop, definitely! Get that DH to take it to an expert! Is he looking after you 24/7?

Merse - gab said about a scan - did I miss that? What scan are you going for and when?

Sarah - loads of positive high FSH stories already! You'll get there - ignore that silly NHS sausage. 

karen -  

Odette - hello! When is the end of term? Week before Christmas?

I'm sure I've missed someone - I always have.  

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girlies,

Well I've had a **** day, I've worked a really long day with no break, came home, dinner, glass of wine in the bath and now going to bed... what a lifea!!

We will have babies,  we will have babies, we will have babies!  Ilikethat.

Well still no symptoms.    

I must go to bed my whole body is trying to sleep!!

Love you all my lovely chums.  

XXXXXXXXx


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Laura - it's not good to have baths in the early stages of pregnancy....Are you now waiting for the official test day...


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## Guest (Dec 4, 2007)

Swinny - Sorry to hear your news re NHS but it's good that you and DH have come to a decision to go privately.  As everyone has said already FSH is just a number.  On my last tx mine was 9.8 and the Dr said anything under 15 is fine.  Your was 13 so you're fine and dandy.  

Inc - Glad that you've good some counselling sorted - hope it goes well  

Hi to everyone else...

...as for me.....AF is in the house...at last...feel like I can get some normality back now.  Need to go and see the Dr after this AF so he can check my lining and then I think FET will be Jan.


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Em at least you know you can get going again now AF has arrived! Hope she won't be too much of a witch! 
Gab good luck with follow up!
Laura 
Mir I'm having a scan to check the endo to see if I need further surgery for pain etc! I'll also ask about my frostie!
Lol to all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Morning all!
Merse - sorry I missed you last night - said I was here and then went to bed!   Is your scan today?
Ems - glad AF is here, least you can make plans now for Jan   
Inc - there's not much to see bump wise at the mo. Just a roundness! Actually feel a bit thinner now i have the bowel business under control by ditching the nasty bloaty Fybogel!   Did you send your forms off in the end or you still thinking?  
Swin - hope things feel a bit better today.   DH will be feeling it in his own way. On our last failed IVF when I was feeling devastated my DH admitted slamming all the cupboard doors in the kitchen - that was the only way I knew he was really hurting too. Look at all our DH's they are all the same - that ideal man doesn;t exist!  
roozer - get that lap top sorted!   ARe you actually flat in bed all day then? Must be hard hun. I'm rubbish on my laptop anywhere else than the study as it just gives me neck ache - I have it raised up in the study with separate key board. Hope you are all well today anyway    
Mirra - have philadelphia on my baked spud! And currently adding bran to everything but least its working!   You still getting up at 0530?  
LB - have a good day at work - least it takes your mind off everything  
do we still have to wait til Thurs? Is that blood or wee test? 
Beach - different menu options for you and DH!   - what a choice in your house! I'm rubbish at cooking steak - comes out like cardboard and DH won't eat anything pink so not worth the effort in our house.
Gab - we are all here to support each other - its a great site isn't it - nothing else like it. I'm sure you wil have you sibling next year  
Still feeling bit crook today, still snotty and sore throat. Don't know what has happened to my immune system  
Have to drag myself in tomorrow cos I'm on a course but at least its not life and death - hate that when you feel unwell   Postman is coming - wonder whether he has my bump bands ( I know i haven't got one!   )
Chat later
NW


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## beachgirl (Jun 7, 2007)

Hello, cant stop as in work, will keep checking to see if anything has happened x


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## INCONCEIVABLE (May 1, 2007)

Woke up at 9... by the phone... Went back for a little snooze and got up at 12.... CAn't believe it...

Anyhoo.... Don't like living in this twilight zone... I haven't sent the  forms yet as it feels like a big step and I am scared....  I am also fed up being at home not working...or working for one day... don't feel useful...
Feels like my life is put on hold... Would be lovely to be happy and smiling again...but it just feels as if it will never happen again... HOpe counselling will help and now regret not having done it in the summer ...If I could somehow have my bio baby I would get better in a nano sec....It's dealing with a compromise, which is a donor baby... It does feel like it's second best... Never thought I would be so clingy about my genes especially as sometimes I can't stand my mother at all...and there are times when I really hate her... Not the most cheerful post... Sorry guys...

Have to get going today and get out of the house as it's feeling claustrophobic...


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Nicks scan on Mon!
Inc know what you mean about being happy I wonder if I'll ever be that again! 
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Inc and Merse


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanx Nicks 
I've just had an email from my sis and basically she doesn't think shes done a thing wrong ,life goes on and basically I'm emotional and should visit her more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Also my Mum hasn't phoned since I had a go at her about my Sis so great I am feeling so supported!!!
I really didn't feel my family would let me down so much when I really needed them or am I being to emotional? xxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Merse - no-one else ever understands   Just try and get on with things as best you can. We all know how it feels on this thread and will never forget. I can only hope that one day your family will realise what you are going through. I always dealt with difficult people by avoiding them and no-one else understood that either. Sounds like you should just take some time out with your sis and eventually it will get better. I knew with my IF friend who was v insensitive after her baby was born that the only solution was avoidance until I was pregnant. I don't think I would even have seen her if I wasn't pregnant but then nothing else can take that pain away.    
I hope your scan goes well next week and then you can have a plan - you will get there in the end   
Love Nicks


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## merse1 (Apr 15, 2007)

Thanx Nicks your right I feel like I'm bashing my head against a brick wall! Thing is I would avoid her but with your sis who lives ten mins away its very difficult!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Nicki W (Nov 1, 2006)

Yeah bit difficult to ditch her!  
Off for a sleep now - still feel pants  
NW


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## Rachel (Mar 10, 2004)

New home this way girls 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=121915.new#new


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