# Travelling with adopted children



## mayflower86 (Jun 6, 2017)

Hi. 

My OH and I are starting to think about adoption after we were told we cannot have birth children. We've done quite a bit of research, and one of the things that we are quite concerned about is traveling with adopted children. My OH is from the US, and we need to travel (usually once a year) to see his mother, as we're the only family she has. We're aware of the logistical challenges with passports, etc. until the AO is granted, but we're more concerned about what we've read about others' experiences with making things like traveling difficult because of anxiety, etc. Do any of you adopters have experience needing to travel abroad with adopted children? Any advice on how to approach this with SWs / things to bear in mind as we make the decision whether to pursue or not? 

Thank you!


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

We travelled with our son just after the AO was granted. He was only 18mths at the time and travel was fine if we kept him occupied. We made him sleep in the travel cot for around 2wks before we travelled so when we got there he was sleeping in a familiar setting. He also napped in his pushchair, which we also took. We quickly learnt he had to have a sweet or drink for taking off and landing as his ears hurt. 
The only time I got really annoyed was when we took my goddaughter with us to Romania (he was 2, she was 15). We had a letter of authorisation from her parents, citing full names, destinations and passport numbers. When the airport personnel checked them, they saw my goddaughter's different name and my son's different skin and instead of asking me about her and the authorisation, they saw my son's different skin tone and assumed he was the one with the different name so asked why I was travelling with him and if I had permission. I was furious! 
Never had any issues since though and LO loves travelling by plane. 

Just make sure that you've done everything legally necessary and ensure that any US regulations are met. I'd recommend waiting for the full AO to be granted and remember it will take another 4-6wks after granted for the full birth certificate to be granted -you have to ring and request the long birth certificate as soon as the AO is granted as you only get issued with the short one.


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

Hi OP, 
This was a concern I had before adopting. I know things aren't guaranteed but so far my boy loves travelling - especially flying! We do a lot of prep to help him and we go to lengths to ensure we have the right property e.g. Our own space and keep to routines as much as possible plus take lots of familiar items. First few years we would take all familiar foods with us and even bedding - now we've been known to take grandparents which LO loves. 
We also look at pics of things at home and transition back home too e.g. Prep in reverse and lots of I wonder if you are taller on your wall chart or I wonder how much your sunflower has grown. Just prompts really that remind him that home is his familiar home. Our LO had a foster family who would regularly take him on caravan holidays so he was used to them to some extent.

Just another thing that adds to the things others can take for granted and demonstrates why we need to think if we can adapt to restrictions and challenges an adoptive child may present that differs from our initial family dream.
For us, ensuring we had the right match and asked questions to consider adaption like this upfront - we also did first few holidays in U.K. caravan parks within 90mins of home so could come home if it was clear he wasn't coping (and thankfully he seems to have been great).

Visiting family in the US could be made to feel more like home and have family really support you with your rules will help make it more possible. Weekly Skype etc will help make things familiar and videos/photos of where or near where you will stay. The more often then it would become a bit of an annual routine and could be seen as more beneficial for an adoptive child than an annual trip to a new destination each year.

That being said I have a friend & her partner where their circumstances have drastically changed and travelling with the kids (non-adopted) to her partners birth country to visit family just cannot be done - so they have to travel alone.
Hope this helps xx


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## Tictoc (Aug 20, 2015)

3 adopted here and we travel frequently. One is not a great eater and whenever we are away I have to give up any thoughts of a balanced diet but other than that we don’t have any issues with travelling.

Oldest was adopted abroad so quite an unsettled start in hotels and am sure this impacted her settling with us. Second was domestic and 9 months so quite aware of things - I think first holiday was too soon and he really didn’t enjoy it - was extremely anxious but after that one he loved holidays - I guess he knew we were going home. Last one was adopted very young and I think because if this no anxiety at all and nothing bothers him!


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## snapdragon (Jun 27, 2011)

My lo is 6 and can be quite challenging at times. Even a trip to the park can be a nightmare but we have been abroad every year with no problems. He enjoys going on the plane. Just needs lots to entertain him. Games and films on his tablet work well. We were due to go long haul this year but had to cancel due to illness (my dh almost died of severe sepsis) but we are planning to go next year.


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