# Repeated donor egg failure



## latestarter

I have just had my 4th negative cycle using donor eggs and I just cannot believe that we have still not been successful.  This is just too cruel - all I read on these boards is how successful donor cycles are and that most people get pregnant on their 1st or 2nd attempt - what is wrong with me?!!


I am so depressed now - when I started on this road 4 years ago I honestly thought it would be over by now and I would be a mum.  I believed all the hype that even if I couldn't do it with my own eggs I would be successful with a donor.  I've had 2 fresh cycles and 2 frozen, 1 of the fresh cycles was with full immunes & the last 2 cycles have been with grade 1 blastocysts.  Is there actually anyone else out there like me or is my body just completely useless and I am just a total failure (this is what it feels like).


We have used both sperm and egg donors on the last 2 attempts as we were told that my husbands sperm was rubbish and my eggs are too old (strange that the only pregnancy we did achieve was with our own eggs and sperm!)


I don't really feel there is much more we can do now - we have used up all my contingency plans - I just can't tell if this is just pure bad luck (and if so what's to stop that going on indefinately) or if I am just incapable of getting pregnant at this time in my life.................


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## Bangle21

Hi latestarter just wanted to pop in and say how sorry i am .....

So much time, energy, money but worst of all hope goes into all this.... Ivf is strssful enough, 'dangling the carrots' but as you know, moving to donor eggs raises expectations even higher ...

I hope you find the energy to keep going..... Hideous and unfair  as it all is i hate to see people go through so much for nothing ....  Ive just done 2 failed DEIVF and am determined im not going through all this to have nothing at the end of it ....  (although i am blessed with a ds after 1st d.e tx....??)

There is just no rhyme nor reason to all this and to ask "why??" and get no answers is so frustrating ...

Where did you go for treatment? Its so stressful going abroad ...

If you can financially do it, try and keep going youve come this far it would be tragic if you did it all for nothing ...

Wishing you all the luck in the world, i know it hurts like no one could imagine ...

Lots of love
Xxx


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## latestarter

Hi Bangle,


Thanks so much for taking the time to reply and for your kind words.


We have been everywhere for tx really. 
We started with the Lister but it was so expensive doing it here in the UK, & we have always been abroad since.
This last effort was an embryo adoption at Reprofit as our last fresh attempt used both egg & sperm donors anyway, and this was the most affordable choice.


My husband is paraplegic and although we are both only 40/41 I feel as if not only money but time is running out for us as we are just not going to be physically able to manage children for much longer.


It is such a game of chance it seems & the odds don't ever seem to be in our favour!


It does seem the majority of people are successful at some point, but there is a minority who are not and at the moment it is looking like myself & my husband are in that minority.


Lots of love to you Bangle xxx


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## Elizzybeth

latestarter -   I'm so sorry you have had repeated negative cycles.  I know how much it hurts. There are ladies who have been successful after many negatives but of course there are some who haven't. I just wish there was some magical way of knowing ..."in x # of cycles you will achieve a baby"!!! But sadly it doesn't work that way. I did read of one lady on this forum who had 16 cycles and achieved a pregnancy on # 17!!  I know I won't have the money or emotional stamina to go this long but I'm happy for her it worked - in fact I think she did 2 more cycles and had twins on the 19th cycle if I remember correctly    Hoping and praying you will be one of the lucky ones!

Hugs,
Elizzybeth


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## Bangle21

Please dont give up late starter, my motto is it aint over till its over..... Xxxx


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## latestarter

Ah, thank you Bangle & Elizzybeth.  


Mostly I don't want to give up because part of me cannot quite believe that we could keep going without ever being successful.  However, another part knows that could happen.  I am sure when I have recovered a bit I will be planning the next tx, but I am not sure that DH is very keen on continuing.


Do you mind me asking where you are in your journey Elizzybeth?


Much love to you both xx


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## Cyprus 4

Dear late starter

Just wanted to let you know you and dh are not alone.  Am sorry things have not worked out for you both as yet 


Hugs

Cyprus


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## Shellebell

Hiya

Have you seen the moving on....or not? Board
There are lots of girls in the same position that are not sure of next steps or whether to move on from TX 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=539.0


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