# How many embryos to put back?? Advice please



## Midgey (Mar 20, 2006)

Hi Everyone!

I was hoping for some advice.  We are about to go to Spain on Sunday for donor egg treament.  I've had two miserable attempts at ivf and by that I mean that on both occasions despite high levels of menopur my scans revealed zero activity in the follicle department.  And donor egg is our next option.

I'm scared about have two embryos put back in (if we get to that stage ) as we really only want one baby (my husband has a previous family).  However, are we really lowering our chances of success??  I know it's a guessing game.  Our donor is 25 so young, however do you think age affects implantation?  I've no idea.    

My reason for being scared of having twins (gorgeous though they are) is really down to my age, the fact that I'm slightly overweight and therefore worried about health implications of carrying twins.  And obviously the rearing of twins.  I'm not geographically close to my mum and family and my husband's work takes him away quite a bit.  (working hard to pay for all this IVF treament!!)

I'd love to hear any of your thoughts as I don't want to be lying up with my feet in stirrups next week still dithering ...... 

Midgegy


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## larkles (Jun 29, 2005)

Hi Midgegy 

Not long now before you head off-am exactly one week behind you. I have done a lot of browsing on this site as to how many to have transferred, I for one, am definately will go for the maximum if we get the choice  dh has no say in it  

Have a look at this poll in the Voting room, thought it might give you some insight and advice

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=83765.0

Good luck Sweetie

Larkles
xx


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## Midgey (Mar 20, 2006)

Hi Larkles  

Thanks for the reply.  

I think my DH is terrified about the prospect of twins.  He (and to a certain extent me) wants to be able to get up and go as we've been used to so much freedom up until now.  We've been together for 15 years and been able to fly off on hols at the drop of a hat, grab a quick drink after work and all the usual stuff.  

This ISN'T the reason why we're nervous about twins but on a practical level our house is over 5 floors!  In my more positive moments, I can see myself down in the kitchen (basement) and keeping v. fit running up and down with nappies, bottles and what ever else babies come with.   .

On a serious note, I'm just hoping my womb lining scan goes ok on Friday.  I'm up to 4 mgs of progynova and must say not having any major side effects - maybe a bit nauseous but that could be to do with the amount of brazil nuts, pineapple and water I'm consuming! 

Are you doing anything different from your last visit to Spain?

Midgey


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## daisyg (Jan 7, 2004)

Hi Midgey,

I have twins as a single mum (at age 46) and your life will change of course - but it is up to you and DH how much freedom you retain - you can travel with baby/ies, it just takes a different mindset.  There is very little difference in my experience between one baby and twins as far as being able to 'get up and go'.  However, I do understand why the prospect would be daunting and healthwise twins are more risky (however, I had no problems at age 46 with a BMI of 31).

Anyway, ref. the question on embryos.  You have to weigh up how many times you may be prepared to do DE with a single embryo to get a baby as there is no doubt the chances are lower than if you transferred two.  Yes, you may risk twins, but you may more likely also risk a bfn etc. etc.  It is a balancing decision and not an easy one.  Will you be transferring blasts??  If so, then 1 blast will give you a better chance for a single embryo transfer.  Do remember though, that even one embyro can split and produce twins so there is no failsafe guarantee with a SET.  

Younger eggs are more likely to be successful of course, so that is another reason why one embryo would give you a chance - but you would have a much higher live birth chance with 2 embyros.  It also depends on your physiology/fertility whether 2 embyros would be likely to implant - all very difficult variables to predict.

What are the success rates at your clinic?  I would ask advice from them ref. the age of your donor, your age, your DH's age and their previous live birth rates transferring 1 and 2 embies (comparing day 3 and day 5 transfers) and then make a decision in conjunction with your doctor and the embryologist.  You are a paying customer for this critical treatment - so use them and ask their advice - that is what they are there for.  

While it is useful asking others their experience,  you need to ask the clinic specifically, as everyone is different and you need to know the chances as they apply to you and your clinic's success rates (live birth NOT pregnancy rates).  The link mentioned above seems to be mainly with women using their own eggs not donor and so is not that helpful frankly.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Daisy
x


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## MrsBunny (Oct 2, 2006)

Hi Midgey

Just wanted to wish you lots of luck and     for your trip to Spain on Sunday.
I'm expecting DE treatment in June at Ceram and have had some of the same thoughts as you about having twins, although we're going to take the risk and have two put back if that's what's recommended at the time.

If it turns out to be twins, yes it will be tough but I suppose it will be a ready-made family - after all at our age (my age anyway) it's highly unlikely that we'd be trying again for a brother or sister for the baby if it worked first time round. And I've always thought families with more than one child are better if that's possible.

Anyway, you seem to have been given a lot of good advice from Daisy and Larkles. Whatever you decide, hope everything goes well for you.

Mrs Bunny x


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## Midgey (Mar 20, 2006)

Thanks for all the advice - and you're right Daisy about getting as much help & guidance out of the clinic and consultant as possible.  I think so few people at Ceram ask for SET that their stats don't really say very much.    My BMI is also 30/31 so it's encouraging to hear you had no problems.  

Mrs Bunny - hope your trip to Ceram goes well and thanks for your good wishes.  All a bit nerve wrecking isn't it!  My sister has had twins naturally (girls who are now 16) and she was lucky to live v. close to my mum who was really hands on.  But I guess you just get on and do what you gotta do!  HOpe it all works out well for us all & and you too larkes!



Love
Midgey


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## daisyg (Jan 7, 2004)

Hi Midgey, Mrs. Bunny and Larkles,

I do hope it all works out well for all of you.  

Daisy
x


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## Kitty kat (Mar 21, 2006)

Hi Midgey

Just to throw my story into the pot.  I am 42 (43 next month) and I am 30 weeks pregnant with twins.  I was on the porky side before treatment and put on a stone and a half with all the medications and my nervous scoffing.  I have no family, and my husband is Swedish so all his family are over there.  My husband also works away a lot - he's flown off today and won't be back now until Friday.

I had four embryos transferred, because we really wanted twins.  Of course one would have been a blessing, but to get our wish of twins was a dream come true.  It has taken off the pressure to have a second child and we know that as we are older the twins will always have each other.

I won't lie, the pregnancy hasn't been easy.  I've suffered really bad morning sickness, I get heartburn from lunchtime onwards, not to mention hiccups.  Its difficult to find a position to sleep in and I've had to give up work early because the hour and half each way commute to work just got too much for me.  But having said all this one of my best friends had a single baby at the end of last year, she's 34 and complained of everything I have.  I remember asking my GP (a women with children) if it was becasue I was older that I felt so tired.  She replied. 'No. You are commuting, working full time and carrying twins, I think find your tiredness is entirely normal.' 

Where there is no help for women over 40 to get pregnant, once you are, they can't do enough for you.  I am being monitored more careful;ly, due to my age, twins and BMI but everyone has been so nice and positive, my GP, the midwives, the hospital, my obstrecian and I've not been made to feel a burden or in any way selfish.

I am worried about coping with two babies, but I have contacted my local twins group who have been great.  I have made contact with the local Surestart group that also offer lots of help and I've been told I can contact the local childcare college and have a student to help out for a few hours a weeks as they need the experience. 

The thought of two babies at once is scary, but we have been told we are having a boy and a girl and we are so very happy with our choice. 

Anyway, good luck with your treatment.  I wish you all the best.

Take care

K


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## Midgey (Mar 20, 2006)

Hi K
Well done on your journey so far.  Your commute would have knackered most people never mind carrying 2 babies.

A boy and a girl !  very exciting and you're right to be organising support groups before they arrive.
  
You were very brave to have 4 embryos transferred but it just shows that was the right odds for you and your DH.    I think twins are lovely and tend to have a really close bond.  As we're going the DE route it would be nice to see twins having this unique bond.  But then who knows they might not even get along!   I'm crossing several bridges before I even get to my womb lining scan on Friday .


K - I'll keep an eye on your postings to see how you're getting on - not long now and a lovely time to have a baby (babies) - coming into the good weather

best wishes

Midgey


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