# Oh relationships! Egg collection and general panic part two.



## silverbream (Feb 10, 2008)

Dear all,

Thanks for the posts re: my relationship. Just had a huge deep and meaningful with my partner and we have decided to have a break, as its true i can't decide whether to commit to her or just be friends and have been see sawing as we have had such a rough couple of years to say the least..she would commit to me but I'm the one who is not sure and this uncertainty has meant that i have ben jerking her around so its best to come clean, and face up to things. I have had to be sure that we can be happy together, well happy enough, and it has been very rough and stressful emotionally for us both. Stakes are high if there is potentially a child involved too.

Oh well, problem is, i am right in the middle of my first IVF cycle  and egg collection is due on tuesday, it seems hypocritical in the least to ask my partner to support me in the circumstances, what is it like and how do you feel afterwards? Is it really necessary to be picked up or can you make your own way home? Have people done so in the past? Is it doable or should i really try to find someone?


I need to know as now I'm stuck. Its all such a bloody mess.

Best wishes to you all
silverbream.


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Silverbeam so sorry to hear about your relationship issues. I can't really help you on that as I am single and TTC with a known donor.   From reading your post you sound to be friends.

As regards ec I was told to have a friend collect me after EC under sedation or GA's otherwise , one of the clinics said that they admitted people overnight if not, another clinic said that if you had no-one to collect you had to go home by cab and ring then when at home, but all my clinics have said to have someone to take you home and stay overnight. Which clinic are you at? some of the FF girls will have been there and maybe ring them up before and ask their protocol

I would try and find someone to collect you - whether you think it is unfair to ask your partner, remembering that you may end up together later and with a baby, or give her first refusal but say you would understand if she said no, and if not find a friend. They just have to come at the end and not necessarily go with you in the morning as well.  

I have felt fine afterwards, after a GA a bit grogy and slept it off, no pain they, after iv sedation I came round quicker I always fear vomiting and always ask for some anti emetics.  My donor or his partner always bring me home.

Best of luck and so sorrry that you have a stressful time and at such crucial timing for your IVF.  Sending you positive vibes 
L x


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## silverbream (Feb 10, 2008)

Thanks; this is sound advice. something at the moment stops me from asking my partner, just can't do it!
I will ask a friend though or my sister, except we have just had a falling out! I live 50 miles away from the clinic, and it is probably unwise to stagger home on the train!!

As for the relation ship......its all so difficult

Thanks, this notice board is a great source of support


xxxxxxxx


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## Lucky1968 (Jul 12, 2007)

Hi Silverbream,

Sorry about your relationship problems, hopefully you are sure they are caused by the relationship itself not the IVF.  I know all the various hormone surges sent me all over the place during the treatment and resulting pregnancy with my partner just looking at me wondering what she has done wrong and why I've gone mad.

On my egg collection I had to have a general anaesthetic (the first I've ever had), I wasn't given the choice of sedation  and it made me sick as a pig.  Apart from at the clinic itself we had to pull over a few times on the way home so that I could vomit (sorry TMI) and I was fairly zonked out there is no way I could physically have made the journey by train or by myself even if I'd overlooked the health issues of having someone with me to  make sure I was OK.  

Whatever the situation with your partner or sister I am sure they would much rather be with you and make sure you were okay.


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## silverbream (Feb 10, 2008)

Thanks, i had it yesterday and it went well. Sedation was rather pleasant actually like waking up from a really nice sleep. My sister met me and i went back to hers and crashed. Now 
i'm at home.

i don't know whats happening between me and my partner but i really need a break from all the stress that our relationship has been causing me and us. I think its the relationship rather than the IVF I'm sad to say...we are just sending each other the odd text and that feels ok for me as sometime when i speak to her my stomach lurches and i don't think thats a good thing.. Have a feeling we will end up as pals.

Going to phone the clinic and see how my eggs are doing...
xxsilever


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