# 3rd Ivf failed - Unexplained infertility



## pampi (Sep 5, 2005)

hi girls,just had another negative today totally devastated,dont know how i will get over this one. Cannot stop crying .I have given it 110% taken more time of work to make sure i rested enough, reflexolgy,acupunture,healthy eating, lots of water and still a negative??    I have unexplained infertility and all cycles have had good emb for transfer, but no frosties as the hosp want the frosties to get to blast? None have made it so maybe thats the problem eh? What will i do cannot give up on my dream of having a little baby, but dont know if i can put myself through this again. Feel as though its getting worse the more failures please help. Dont know what I would do without this website [pampi x


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## Mummytoone (Mar 23, 2002)

Hi Pampi 

sorry to hear your feeling so low, hugs coming your way xxxx

Dont have long but just very quickly, dont know where you live but the ARGC in London is worth a shot if you have had several failed attempts. This is there speciallity and have fantastic results. Not cheap, far from it but dont know your circumstances so thought I would mention.

Lots of love and big big hugs


Lou xxxx


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## pampi (Sep 5, 2005)

Thanks lou,
Worth thinking about especially when hosp keep saying its just luck need to keep trying. I think it could be an implantation problem as everything is going great then they go in and? Maybe that hosp would investigate it a bit more, thanks for your advice. We are in London a bit so could be an option.
I think I am going to ask more questions and not accept the brief answers.

Big Ta Pampi xx


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## casey (Sep 26, 2004)

Pampi - just to say  how sorry i am and thanks for your message - a 3rd BFN IS devasting - no doubt about it and like you, i too have done eveything possible to try to maximise the chances of success - but IF is unfair - maybe a change of clinic or second opinion could halp you. I hope you find some comfort and strenght over the next few days & weeks  

BTW - that hole and the bottles of vodka sound lovely - can i have mine with cranberry juice - just to be festive  

love caseyxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Anne_7 (Mar 20, 2005)

Have you tried taking baby aspirin during tx and during you 2ww?

Just thought I'd mention something different.  I have 2 failed tx, I am now on my 3rd but taking aspirin this time, hope it will make a difference.

Love, Anne x


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## Zildjian (May 19, 2005)

Pampi

I'm so sorry to hear about your bad news ; I dont know what to say only that I know how you are feeling; I too got a bfn today and I am totally devastated  ; It was my first attempt at ICSI; A 3rd bnf must be devastating; you are a very brave person and that is such a strength;  I am also from Glasgow- where did you go for treatment?  I had to go private to Glasgow Nuffield; I have got a string of questions to ask my consult Dr Yates re the treatment failing; as Lou mentioned it may be worth investigating another clinic, but you being a Glasgow girl like me cant travel down to London for treatment;  we are so limited in Scotland for clinic options (there are only about 4 I think) and non of them do really advanced ivf treatment;  it sounds like you have had good embies; when you have a meeting with your consultant it may be worthwhile asking him to run tests on you to check out if there could be a possible implantation problem;  I am quering that about myself as I had good embies going back in; but the clinic just said that it is unluckiness;  I'm determined to find out more, especially as the treatment has cost me and DH £4,000;  Dr Yates advised me that there is no evidence that baby aspirin works, it should only be taken if you have sticky blood (whatever that is); it may be worthwhile asking your clinic about sticky blood.  Please try not to be too hard on yourself; you are not to blame, you have done everything right; be good to yourself, it is a devastating time but each day you will get stronger, just give yourself time

Best wishes
Fiona x


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## pampi (Sep 5, 2005)

Thanks fionag for your lovely message, yes I am also going to the nuffield in glasgow doctor Lowe. They both are very good and very nice, but when it comes to 3rd attemt failing I really feel there must be something wrong as the emb have all been good. So there must be a problem with implantation, im so devastated that im not sure i can keep going on the basis one of these times i will be lucky?? When do you have your follow up app? I'm going tues, but previously i have felt that its just a case of everthing is going great until they go back, so one they these times it will work. I hope you are ok, its so diffucult. I think the first time you have such high expectations, are you planning your next treatment? Let me know as it maybe at the same time as me. Oh if my dh could hear me yesterday i said never again!Just wanted to go into a dark hole with a bot of vodka, gin, and a wee bot of bacardi as a mixer ha take care and chin up know how you feel, so you are not alone. 

Take care pampi x


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## Zildjian (May 19, 2005)

Hi Pampi

I know honey, as I'm sitting here now i cant stop   this is such a horrible time especially with Xmas round the corner;  I's still in my pj's, I dont have the strength to do anything today, I'm in hibernation mode for the weekend cant face the world and pg women  My review appoint with Dr Yates is on 19 Dec;  It may be an idea when you see Dr Lowe on Tues to write down a list of questions, I'm going to do this and one of them will be about the immunological reaction causing implantation problems; there is a website called the miscarriage clinic which has evidence to say that failed ivf/icsi can be caused by implantation problems due to the person having a high level of killer NK cells; it may be worth printing the page and taking it along to your consult; we are paying a lot of money for treatment and we are entitled to ask questions; the nuffield nurses said to be that I am just unlucky and there is a 70% failure rate with the treatment but I want to cover all medical options for my next treatment;  that is good that you are planning to go for another cycle; that takes a lot of courage and strength; I am thinking about going for treatment in March time (spring time, new beginnings); when are you thinking about going for treatment? I am wondering if you were the lady I spoke to in the waiting area at the nuffield a few weeks ago - I spoke to someone on her 3rd icsi attempt and I advised her to take a co-enzyme 10 supplement and to read the zita west book?  You are doing really well, each day you will get stronger; I read on the FF site somewhere that a failed treatment cycle is like lousing a parent or a spouse in relation to the grief that is experienced  the pain of IF never goes away, and although this is my first attempt it is devastating;as you say expectations are so high;  if you want to personal message me anytime please do, I'm hear if you want to talk

Take care
Fiona x


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## hola69 (Nov 17, 2005)

Oh Pampi,

you poor love, am sending you lots of hugs  ..Ive had 2 cycles and at first they said it was unexplained fertility and have now found out its my eggs and I have high prolactin due to a prolactinoma.. hence Im going for egg donation now.

Have you had a folow up appointment and have they discussed other options with you? Are you thinking of having another go? Maybe get a 2nd opinion..

I dont know what else to say hun..except Im very sorry, thinking of you and hope you will be ok soon.. 

If you need a chat let me know..

Hugs and love

Lesley xxx


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## yfinlayson (Dec 15, 2004)

Hi ladies, 

I've had 2 treatments at the Nuffield.  I've taken multi-vits for both, but got my faint BFP on the 2nd attempt when I started accupuncture and aspirin - but I continued drinking coffee, chomping chocolate, swimming and going to the gym.  I stuck to a rigid diet with no exercise on cycle 1, which was negative and I thought I had nothing to lose (except money I guess) for cycle 2. 

I have added complications in that I don't repond to the stimm drugs and I have a thin womb lining - so I need Viagra too. I'm a bit of a nuisance for their stats!   I am under Dr Conway, and I will be having tx with him again, probably around March.  It is important to remember that the chances of this working are low - although that is no consellation when you read all the BFP's on here.

Yvonne


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## susy (Nov 23, 2004)

Hi ladies, I have just failed the third ICSI and feel so lost and devastated. I feel I do not fit in with society. I would like to go part-time with work but then all my friends have kids and we need the money to pay for all this.
Cycle 1 we had top grade 'compacting morulla's', the stage before a blastocyst, cycle 2 a grade -1 and 2 and this cycle a grade 1 10 cell and another morulla so we don't understand why it fails. I think it must be implantation ? I asked about NK cells last time but both consultants didn't believe in it.
We have 5 frozen from this cycle but if they were like the other 5 we have no chance. They freeze them day 1 so we do not know what they are like.
Sorry Pampi I am not helping you but I understand how you feel. All I can say is don't give up yet, may get lucky 4th time.
Susy


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## Lauren (Jul 2, 2004)

Hi, hope you don't mind me jumping in on this thread but Susy I've just read your post on here and wanted to say how sorry I am that you have had to go through another negative cycle.  I was on a thread with you back in May when we had both just had a negative cycle and I really feel for you that you have had to go through this again.  I know it is so very hard to feel positive about anything right now (back in May I had just had my 5th neg and thought I would never feel happy again) but me and my dh have now started the procedure to adopt a little baby from Guatemala and I have really surprised myself about how good I feel about things and how over time I have been able to come to terms with not having my own natural children.  It has been a long road and a year ago I never thought I would feel like this but I really am very positive about the future now and so so pleased to be off the horrendous ivf rollercoaster.  

I'm sure at the moment you probably can't ever imagine a life without your own natural children but I have learnt over the past 6 months that sometimes there is another way and it can actually be a better way.

Take care of yourself and also lots of love to you Pampi - sending you both a big hug.

Lots of love
Lauren xx


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## Richmar (Dec 17, 2005)

Hi Lauren, just read your message and our situations are almost identical. We also are thinking of adopting and as the procedure seems to be a nightmare in this country, are thinking of adopting overseas. Would you mind letting me know how you went about arranging this? Good luck.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi Richmar

I am currently waiting to go to panel for adoption in the uk, it hasn't been a nightmare at all but it seems every LA or agency do things differently.   why not pop on to the adoption thread and have a read as there are ladies adopting from abroad there too.

good luck, pam xx


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## susy (Nov 23, 2004)

Thanks for your reply Lauren, it gives me comfort to see you have found happiness again. IVF is cruel and I sometimes wish it wasn't available and we would have grieved by now and perhaps adopting ?  
We have just got back from 2 weeks in Tenerife, in a way it was good but I dreaded the thought of coming back to another year of IVF.
I wish you all the best with your adoption, we would consider overseas as well, my boss has an adopted son from the Phillipines and they are all happy so it can work.
Susy


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