# Hi, can I join you all?



## Megan10 (Jul 16, 2004)

Hi there,
First I should confess to being a frequent lurker on this board. You have often given me guidance and support without even knowing it  
My name is Megan and my partner and I have recently made the decision to find a way to live life without children of our own. Its been a 5 year journey for us with all the tests and 5 ICSI treatments - a path which I know is sadly all too familiar to many of you. We had our last ICSI result on Christmas Day 2006 and with it came the decision that enough is enough. 
We feel we really did try everything (including all the latest immune treatments) that was available to us going as far as we felt we were able to go. So we leave treatment with much sadness but without regrets. 
Now comes the tough part. We somehow have to accept that our future will be very different from the one we imagined. I especially have to deal with the sadness which sometimes feels overwhelming. Today is one of those days when I keep finding myself in tears. No particular trigger, it sometimes just washes over me. 
Together my lovely partner and I need to build a wonderful and fulfilled life together. It seems so easy if you write it quickly  
The amazing Maggie May and I have already met through a group we joined in January. It was so helpful and I am in awe of her plan to spread that support to others through her own workshops. 
So I would love to join your wonderful and supportive group if you will have me. 
Love MeganXX


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## Maggie Mae (Mar 2, 2006)

Megan, 

WELCOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is tough to admit that it is time to be here, but also liberating. I've never known such compassion and solidarity as I have found here - you've heard me on that topic a few times already - and I am utterly convinced that being here will help in some way. 

You've been through an incredible amount, and I would say it is not surprising that all it seems right to do somedays is cry. Let it out, it is the best thing to do with your grief. 

I've no doubt that by the end of today there will be a dozen messages like mine saying welcome aboard!

BIG LOVE TO YOU!!!!

MM xxx

PS not so much amazing as just trying, in my own way, to make sense and purpose out of this madness, but, THANK YOU for the compliment!!


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## NixNoo (Aug 19, 2005)

Hello Megan

Welcome - I'm sure you feel you know many of us already if you've been lurking.  I'm sorry you've had to join us (in the nicest possible way) but as you've probably noticed on this board, we have some amazing times - crying, laughing and sometimes pure hysteria!  Everyone is so lovely here as MM has said. 

Nice to have you with us.

Lots of love
Nix (Niki)
xx


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## Yamoona (Nov 7, 2005)

A big welcome Megan, you have been through so much and have been very brave and strong for a long time. I had to learn that in order to get through this it is ok now to be a little vulnerable and say you know what I am tired, hormonal and fed up. I found it so liberating to be like this instead of trying to cope all the time. This only happended recently which you may have read and now I am back at work and though not 100% there (still have lots of work to do), I can at least get through most days without crying. I say most days as I do still have my down days like we all do but the ladies on here always get me through it. I am glad you have posted, stick with us and tomorrow is another day.

xxx


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## bell (May 17, 2005)

Hi Megan welcome

you have been so brave but strong to make that big decision, its so hard i am still trying to come to terms with not having any children. we also can say we tried everything and we have no regrets, We lost our 2 little angels in jume and our 1 angel on xmas days to, l am finding it very tough and cry everyday and i sit and think what started me off and nothing in particular, i really feel for you Megan, l also agree with all the ladies on this thread and the advise they will pass to you, they have all helped me when i have needed to scream or talk,

The only advise i can give you is keep talking to the dh about how your feeling and also about how he is feeling, as long as you are both strong you can get through this, to me that was the most important thing,

Take care Megan

bell cxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## emcee (Apr 3, 2005)

Hi Megan

Sending you a massive welcoming   and saying that I'm glad you are here even though the road to getting here has been so difficult and heartbreaking for you.

One pearl of wisdom I was given after my last IVF attempt was I didn't fail the treatment - the treatment failed me. It was of little comfort to me at the time because my head and heart were all over the place - I still have those moments even now almost 2 years down the line!

There is life after treatment, but there is much grieving along the way too. We are here for you to talk to and support and bolster you in any way we can whilst you travel along this new path.

Looking forward to chatting to you hon - go gently sweetie, you have been through an enourmous amount...

With much love,
Emcee xxx


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## pipkin (Jan 14, 2005)

Emcee said 'pull up a chair and get yourself a nice cuppa' when I asked if I could join this thread which made me feel so welcome.

So now I am saying that to you too.

Welcome Megan
Pipkin x


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## Bandicoot (Mar 8, 2007)

Hello Megan, a very big welcome to you!

I was a frequent lurker to this board before I began posting, too. That made me smile.  

Love the idea of us all sitting round a table with a cuppa, Pipkin and Emcee! Make mine English Breakfast - with a nice big chunk of Easter egg, of course...  

Welcome Megan!

B xxx


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## Megan10 (Jul 16, 2004)

Thanks so much for all the lovely welcoming notes. You have me in tears again but good tears. 
I'm a decaf earl grey with a nice slice of lemon drizzle since its Easter.
So looking forward to getting to know you all.
Thnaks again, what a lovley bunch you are!
Love MeganXXX


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## solitaire (Mar 26, 2007)

Hi Megan,

Welcome - from a newbie! I'm impressed with your good manners   I didn't even think of asking if I could join, I just turned up unannounced and cried all over everyone.  

I have been overwhelmed with the support and understanding I have found here. I clearly remember how hard it is when you reach the painful decision to move on, so I am sending you a big  
and would love to join you all round the table for a cuppa. Mine is Clipper Fairtrade, white without!

Take good care of yourself,
Love,
Nickah
xxx


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## flipper (Jul 7, 2004)

Hi Megan

I just wanted to add my welcome to that of the others.  I'm also a Clipper Fairtrade gal,  it really does hit the spot (that would be the T spot as opposed to the G spot!)

I was really impressed with your saying "Together my lovely partner and I need to build a wonderful and fulfilled life together".  You're right, type it real quick and it's painless but just the fact that you can see what has to be done will help you along the way.

My dh and I are continuing to build a wonderful and fulfilled life together, it's not always easy and it can be very painful at times (let those tears flow), but it can be done. 

Good luck.

flipper


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## ruby k (Jun 2, 2004)

Hey Megan
Just to join in and say welcome  . You have been through such a lot, and like the others have said, I'm so sorry to hear of all the difficulties you've had/are having. I am also fairly new to the final decision to stop tx...You are not alone.

Lots of love ruby xx
ps earl grey for me please (but i put milk in it, which i know is naughty as it should be lemon)


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## jq (Nov 14, 2006)

Hi Megan,

A belated welcome from me! I look forward to getting to know you. Personally, I think a glass of wine is nice when we all talk!

love
Jq xxx


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