# Can't egg share again with that clinic, would another clinic accept me??????



## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Hello, I'm wondering if anyone has any advise please.

I've just undergone my first round of IVF which resulted in a BFN. 
Basically I was sterilised at the age of 21.... Stupid thing to do, anyway I can't turn back the clock so me and my Husband decided to try egg share as I'm also helping someone else too, I am lucky enough to have have children, but felt having another child would complete our family.

All tests came back fine, a match was found so started the journey, half way through the drugs I was flippantly told that I had polycystic ovaries (which I felt should have be explained to us before) anyway whilst on stims they told me I had 35 follicles, they were concerned about OHSS so rapidly dropped my dose and got me in quick for ER during the procedure i was told that i had only had 2 eggs both not matured so basically prepare for the worst.
I was devastated for myself and also the recipient, I couldn't stop thinking about her and the guilt was horrible, I felt like I'd let everyone down.

The clinic didn't really explain anything, I relied on this site to get information.
They did a blood test which showed them my oestrogen level had plummeted.

The next day i had a phone call telling me that one had matured over night and fertilised.... Great apart from they told me because I was at risk from OHSS they would have to freeze it, again i didn't understand anything about FET, and the clinic didn't seem to have the time to explain either, so did my research myself.
I had a 3dt on the 7th Jan, 7 days later I started bleeding.

I've been back for a follow up and they have told me they wouldn't risk doing another egg share cycle with me even though she admitted that the gamble didn't pay off and that really the cycle should have been cancelled.

My question is really would another clinic be likely to accept me??

Thank you in advance


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

So sorry to hear of your recent BFN   

It's purely guess work but I'm sure another clinic would accept you especially if they know all the facts before hand. 

They would just have to monitor you closely and adapt your protocol. Were you given metformin to take as that is often given to women who have pcos and also helps to control the follie development, although it wouldn't necessarily prevent you from over stimulating.  I don't understand why your pcos wasn't picked up at one of your earlier scans. 
It doesn't sounds as though you were managed properly or treated fairly at all, in the time you were given or explanations to their actions i.e a FET. A fet is normal for someone who has over stimmed but you deserved a breakdown of the process.

What area are you in?  I ES at nuffield woking and can't fault the place and my sil ES at CRM london and she only has praise for them.


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Thank you so much for your reply
No i wasn't given metformin, I don't think I was looked after properly either and now I've ruined my chance plus the other lady   
My follow up (That I had to fight for) was Monday and she just very flippantly said we took the wrong gamble and it never paid off, so why not just cancel, yeh I would have been upset but me and the other Lady would have had another shot at it and they would have been more clued up with how to deal with me!!
I have thought about approaching another clinic, but like you said the chances are they will see what happend and wouldn't accept me!!
Gutted I wish we had the money for a full cycle but we just haven't, so if i am not able to egg share again then it's over   
I live in Shropshire
Thank you again


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## ~ MJP ~ (Oct 16, 2006)

Hi Charlie, so sorry to read what you've been through   

I have polycystic ovaries and have egg-shared twice, at The Lister in London. They accept donors with this condition and I can assure you that you are monitored with scans & blood tests very closely (I was scanned everyday in the latter stages of stimming). I produced many eggs and got pregnant with twins on my second attempt, but never overstimulated. The expertise & care I received there was brilliant, I'd highly recommend them. Why not give them a call.. best of luck!


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

''I have thought about approaching another clinic, but like you said the chances are they will see what happend and wouldn't accept me!!''

Ahh hun no thats not what I said. I said they probably would and just monitor you closely.  Give a few a ring I think you'll be surprised


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Thank you both so much for your replies
MJP - Wow twins, that's lovely news    London is quite far to travel if I would have to go every day, but heard lots of good things about Lister.

Just a girl - Sorry i read your message wrong lol.

Would you think they would speak to me on the phone about it? 
Feel so trapped


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

There is a PCOS board around, maybe post on there and someone will point you in the right direction clinic wise.  BTW you haven't let anyone down it was your clinic who let both you and your recipient down. x


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Thank you so much, it's unbelievable what a bit of support can give you off people who have been in the same boat   
I will take a look, thank you for your advise
x


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## Hopeful J (May 7, 2008)

sorry am late but had to add my 2pence   

firstly so sorry to hear of the appalling way they've handled your tx   

Secondly i also have PCOS and have cycled at the Lister who are FAB    in fact i will be cycling with tem again - I believe you can still go through the lister even if you dont live in london, i think they use 'satellite' clinics to do your scans etc closer to home but you will have to go to london for ec/et (Hayley is that right?) x


I'm sure they'd be happy to talk to you about it 

Good luck hun     
xxx


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

Oooh no idea about the satellite clinic thing, sounds like it makes sense but I only went to one place for everything.


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Thank you for that advise, it's lovely of you all.
Well I took your brilliant advise and I rang Lister and Londons Woman Clinic on Friday, explained briefly what had happend, I said that there was not really any point in me wasting their time or mine going all the way unless they would at least consider me, I haven't heard back from Lister yet, but LWC called me back and she said that she couldn't really see any reason that I couldn't be considered from what I have told them, so I have to call back to make an appointment, thank you so much for that advise I would have probably just thought that they will say no forever without me actually picking up the phone (sometimes think I'd rather have a doubt in my mind than a knock back) Really pleased I did, I know it's not yet a yes but it's not a no either   

The only thing is now I have to ask the clinic I was with if I can have all my records, no doubt they will charge me!!

Satellite clinic would be even better, I've never heard of that, don't suppose you know anything more about them do you??

Really appreciate your help and advise!!

Thank you x


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## Hopeful J (May 7, 2008)

ahh thats fab charlie    hopefully you'll get an appointment soon 

I'm not totally sure how it works but i definitely know some ladies on here used lister but as they wasnt near they used sattellite clinics and just came to london for the big stuff i'm gonna do some digging let me look around 

xx


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## Hopeful J (May 7, 2008)

ok found this quote on their page:

Drawing upon our experience of treating over 2,000 couples on average per year, together with the *support given to our satellite fertility clinics elsewhere*, we understand fully the needs of individual couples facing fertility treatment and seek to respond in a professional and supportive manner.

so they do use satellite clinics maybe ask them for infor when they call you back 

the site (if you dont already have itlol ) is http://www.ivf.org.uk/the-lister-fertility-clinic/

x

/links


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Ahh thank you that's lovely of you!! I think I will call them back because I have a feeling I missed their call, will deffo ask about that   x


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## ~ MJP ~ (Oct 16, 2006)

The satellite idea is a good one! Wish it had been suggested/available to me. 

I spent the best part of a year having treatment at The Lister (2 IVFs & 2 FETs) Each appointment took up the whole day as it's a 320 mile round trip for me. 

So worth it though!!


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

I asked them about the satellite idea, she said yes they do it but not in my direction lol, typical, oh well it was a good idea and at least I know now.
Ahhh yes it will deffo be worth it
Thank you x


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## bluegirl1980 (Nov 22, 2010)

Hi,

I have PCOS and was refused my one clinic, but  am now doinf egg sharing at CRM London, they are great, just said they will keep a close eye on me.


Stacey x


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Hi Bluegirl
Sorry it's taken me a while to reply!!
I have spoken to LWC and Lister, both have said they wouldn't say no straight away and that they couldn't see why I couldn't have another go, because it seemed like my dose was responsible?? 
I've got to try to get all my notes back and send to them and see what they say, bit concerned though because its about a 3.5 hour drive and it's the latter stages I'm concerned about with having to go most days, I will gladly do it to get what I want, but it's practicalities with work etc!!
Thank you for your reply and good luck with your treatment
x


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

Charlie 
Is that 3.5 hours both ways? Have you rang every local(ish) clinic to see if they will consider you?  My clinic was about an hour away and that really wasn't too bad, The last week when stimming I think I needed to go 3 times, then we got a hotel the night before EC as needed to be there really early.  I really hope you find something suitable x


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Hello, Yes its 3.5 hours each way!
The one I was using was about an hour away and there really not any other local clinics that would except me, there are only 2 local to me anyway   
Thank you


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## katena (Nov 14, 2007)

HIya,

Charlie - good luck hun!

Where abouts do you live... if you dont mind me asking?

k


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Thank you Katena
I live in Shropshire.
Good luck with your treatment


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## katena (Nov 14, 2007)

Thanks!

I just wondered if the travel time is shorter if you go to Manchester... or Nottingham to one of the Care clinics?

I am with Care and have pcos and they have been great!!!

k


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

Yes it would be shorter but I spoke to them and the person I spoke to said because I had only 2 eggs collected before that they prob wouldn't be able to take the risk with me


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## katena (Nov 14, 2007)

But 'probably' and definatley are 2 very different answers!

You couldve spoken to someone 'not in the know'   .... could be worth another shot?! 

k


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## charliex1 (Mar 9, 2010)

I know but my concern is that if that is their opinion before I've even been then could be wasting money on consultations, it's a tricky one


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