# the kids are alright



## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi381421337/

my mum just told me about this movie!

i love juliane moore and anette benning!

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## IGWIN79 (Jan 19, 2009)

Awe that looks really good have to see it for def


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## Pinktink (Dec 17, 2008)

Not sure... 

wonder if many actual gay families were consulted or if this is from an outside perspective...

didn't like the woman kissing the donor guy bit... kinda missing the point?


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## deemo (Oct 13, 2009)

I saw it and I enjoyed it, it's a nice relaxing film. Some bits of it very familiar


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## BobbyS (Sep 23, 2010)

It was quite funny but we were all a bit annoyed and uncomfortable about the woman with the donor, don't know why they had to put that in... especially as the Director was involved in the L Word... it's a shame because we enjoyed the rest of the film.

But glad the topic is becoming more mainstream and at least it gets people talking


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## charlruk (Oct 28, 2010)

Im sure the director is gay and has a child/children with a sperm donor!


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## lucky2010 (Jan 10, 2006)

charlruk, you are right she is.


Rach


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## Steph29 (Apr 28, 2009)

We watched it thought it was a good film but was not sure why they put the women with the donor.


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## daisyg (Jan 7, 2004)

Here's an interesting interview with Lisa Cholodenko which touches on Jules's affair with the children's donor -

http://www.atnzone.com/nz/2010/07/08/interview-lisa-cholodenko-the-kids-are-all-right/

Daisy
xx


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## Pinktink (Dec 17, 2008)

hmmm I don't think I agree with her reasoning and felt like the comment about

_All of those things considered, I think it's probably going to be a bummer for some lesbians on the right side of the continuum. But that's okay. I'm at peace with that._

is a little bit dismissive of the reasons it might be a 'bummer' 

Maybe I'm taking it too seriously but I dont think i'll watch it.


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## BobbyS (Sep 23, 2010)

I guess £££ makes anything easier to be at peace with....


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

im quite persuaded by her interview .... i think its quite plausable that one might have an attraction to the donor of your child .... in that way supposedly adopted siblings who are seperated and dont know each other are attracted to each other when meeting by accident are.  you love your child and then there is someone who is very like them in a way youre not.

but i get it is a bit pants when alot of the discrimination one recieves as a lesbian couple is a kind of belittling and invisibility because you are two women ... and really you must be waiting for a man to come along to be properly satisified.  many people are really threatened that two women can be support each other emotionally, financially, practically without a man in the picture at all.  so one hopes that media representations about lesbian life are going to kind of help get the message across that lesbian couples dont need a man, and arent missing out.  so it maybe feels a bit poo to have a lesbian director make a movie that possibly feeds into this idea rather than counters it.

but i guess life is complicated.  sexuality is fluid, even for the most gay of gay or straight of straight .... and the best movies, books art etc arent really about simplistic ideas they are about complex multi dimensional ideas and charachters.  so maybe its more 'real' to have  a charachter that is attracted to her child's donor for a moment, a full on lesbian in a committed relationship, who is also a real complex person.

but i havent seen the film ... so reserve judgment.

sorry about horrendous spelling x


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## daisyg (Jan 7, 2004)

I also haven't seen the film yet, but do you think that despite desperately wanting it to be an independent production, there was pressure for Lisa C to appeal to a wider commercial audience by including an affair with the donor?  Would it have been more 'acceptable' and still as commercial to straight audiences if this affair hadn't taken place?

Again I need to see the film to form judgement.... I hope this isn't the case though...

Daisy
xx


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## Hales :) (Mar 26, 2010)

Watched it last night, have to say I thoroughly enjoyed it lots of really funny, and also touching stuff - I'll admit to having a bit of a snivvel at the end.  Can see how Jules ended up cheating, but know what you mean about feeling a uncomfortable with the bit with the donor.  Interesting film and worth a watch!


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## floralou (Jul 21, 2010)

Me and OH saw this film last week, and we did enjoy it...once we got past the predicted stereotypes. I hate that every time a lesbian couple is portrayed in the media, they have to go with a femme/butch type pairing. This couple weren't SO bad, but still, they had to make Nik have short hair, the high flying job and wear shirts/vests/tank tops. It's just frustrating that's all. And I'm sure it was only done that way so that it had more appeal to a mass audience, but it drives me mad that society views lesbian couples this way as it is, films like this are only going to reinforce that (often incorrect) stereotype.

Rant over lol.


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## Hales :) (Mar 26, 2010)

The thought did cross my mind Laura - Nic was so mannish, but then on the other hand it did cross my mind that the vast majority of lesbians over 40 that I have met tend to fit into this stereotype (those that have always lived as a lesbian anyway) - Not sure why this is, whether bowing to outside pressure or what, but we seem to have more freedom nowadays to act/dress how we want.  That's the only justification I can think of anyway!


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