# Disillusioned Part 3 .......



## MissTC (May 8, 2006)




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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Thanks Tracy! Love the baubles!!!

Lily - It was a jelly on the tummy normal variety. It took ages and there were measurements galore! I saw less clearly than I do with the Trans V scan though. Baby was measuring 13 weeks (it's getting big!!) and all looked normal. I willl have to wait for the blood tests that accompany the scan before I know what my % risk is. I was terrified!

Plus this Dr was really realy scathing of IVIg and said that I was being conned and put at risk. That concerned me too. He, like I previously, feels that there is no evidence and it is just a money grabbing exercise. I explained that I am between a rock and a hard place and feel like I have no choice. He understood that. 

Oh well...what to do.

How's your day been My feet are throbbing and I need at least 100 hours sleep now.

I tried to internet shop but could not decide what to buy anyone so had to face the music!!

Any plans for tonight

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Blimey Katey, what an unbelievably awful situation you are in regarding the IVIg. Unfortunately I know very little about it, but know you wouldn't have entered into it lightly. All I can see is that it appears to be working and I can see totally why you have to continue with it. Plus it does seem to be having an effect on your killer cells right? Are there any other girls on here having it?

I'm so pleased everything looks normal on the NT scan. My clinic said it was more accurate than the blood test, which can be unreliable in us IVF'ers, so good news for you.

As for Christmas shopping - you're very brave trekking out today. I was lucky to get a few special things from the craft fair we went to earlier, otherwise it's been simple books, cds and dvd's.

Nothing exciting tonight. There's absolute rubbish on tv - unless you know otherwise. DH has a chunky paper with 101 supplements, so that may keep us busy. 

I'm feeling a bit rubbish myself - hard to explain. Think I'm stressed about the NT scan which is still 3 weeks away. I'm a bit worried how my tummy's growing already. I was wondering, if people look at you, would they tell you're pregnant yet? I'm thankful it's winter and I'm wearing warm, disguising outdoor gear when I see people.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

You know....i would wear that bump with pride. Who cares what anyone else thinks? People can tell with me now at 12 weeks (have had 100 people ask) so you cannot hide it for long. I am so excited about getting a bump I cannot tell you!

Why is the blood test less accurate with IVFers

The IVIg is a nightmare. My only concern is the possibility of contamination of viruses from the donors. Honestly it terrifies me. They cannot screen for CJD or things not yet discovered. All I can do is trust in God.

I am all nicely showered and off to watch the X factor final (tat TV I know) and I have to wrap countless gifts...which I hate!

Enjoy the supplements (any holiday without flying ones).

Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

I just don't want anyone to know until after the NT scan....

Re the blood test. I got an info sheet from the fertility clinic which said that as an IVF'er I would need an NT scan as the blood test is often incorrectly higher (ie false positive) in our group. They said I must speak to my local consultant about it and if I wasn't able to get one with him, I had to let them know, so they could suggest where to get one done locally. Fortunately, the hospital midwife and consultant, both mentioned it separately on my first appointment last week, before I had chance to and told me also that the blood test wasn't reliable. Perhaps, if taken together (scan + blood test) it shows a broader picture and if the blood test comes back low, when it can easily be too high, then that will be excellent news.
Here's a link: http://humrep.oxfordjournals.org/cgi/content/full/17/4/1081

Hope you enjoyed your tv - I'm afraid I don't know what the x-factor is . Shame we don't live closer - I love wrapping presents, and choosing the tags from the previous year's Christmas cards.

Time for a snack . Love Lily. xx

/links


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Thanks for that link. I have scanned it quickly and when this confounded headache of mine has gone I will delve deeper. 

I can understand your apprehension pre NT scan...but that bump will show whatever you decide...babies are sneaky like that!!!!! 

If you like wrapping gifts so much I will send a limo to get you....grab your coat!!! I hate it! There are so many and they are all awkard shapes or huge (eg a moses basket for my brother's girlfriend)!

Have a good night! 

Miss you Laura and where is Kim??

Hugs, Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hey, have sat with my coat on all day and limo no show!  

I tend to save boxes and bubble wrap for awkward presents, although I'm not so sure about the moses basket. Will you be using one of these? I hadn't considered them, although they are so cute.

Still reading the supplements - haven't found any non - fly bargain trips for you yet, except to cold places via Eurostar. Stuggled with some sweet potato soup for lunch - it had too many other flavours in it - have never been one for plain food until now....

Hope your day's going well.

Where's Laura and Kim? Laura - aren't you finished entertaining yet - it's our turn now?!

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hay Girls!!! I'm back!!

I'm exhausted!  My friend is  shopaholic!!  We went blue water friday afternoon and evening... yes til 10pm!! And then to Romford All day sat!  She wanted to go out today but I refused! Was ood fun and pretty much done now just my folks to buy for and getting them a slow cooker so will pick that up in the week.

My friend even wrapped most of my pressies for me while I cooked the dinner so about 1/2 are all wrapped.  I also have tims birthday thursday so that will be more pressies to wrap!!

I'm out tomorrow with my Hastings mate for a ruby in brick lane and then meeting my brighton mate on tue in spitalfield for some grub so won't be about much this week.  Got acupunture on wed and then round to see my mate and her baby.  Shes home now...can't remember if I told you that already?

I'll have to go back a few pages and see what i missed from the last thread...  wow page three now!!

Katey- so glad the scan went well and about the IVIg can you not stop it now you are so far along?  I know its so hard to make a decision over these things, and I don't know enough to give any advice.. sorry XX

Lily - Oh I would LOVE to have a bump, you'll soon be wearing it with pride, 3 more weeks and you'll feel loads more confident.  Htold your mum ect yet?  or are you going to tell them at xmas??  

Anyway one week to go yeah!!  I love Christmas, seeing all the people that mean so much to me.  And of course Kitten!! So far feeling ok, hope I can keep this cheery composure right through the holidays.

Still no AF??!!  I havn't had one now for 2 months!!  And I've still got cystitis.  Had it for 6 days now had 3 boxes of those nasty sachets now!  And can't get drs appointment either.  My girls bits are being very naughty!!

Anyway nice to be back.

Hopefully I speak to you both again later. XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Weyhey Laura's back!     although just reading your post have left me exhausted! The Queen of entertainment! Glad your friend's home with her baby. No, I haven't told my parents yet. They're abroad until March and we are in touch by text mainly. I'll tell them at the same time as everyone else. No rush. I need to feel confident I'm definately having this baby before I tell people. Don't know why I'm so nervous, maybe 6 years of failures and a sister who had a miscarriage at 14 weeks....

Hey Katey - where are you? Hope you haven't got yourself all tangled in the selotape! In the tv guide that came with the paper it discusses a programme on this week and I thought of you - it's something about making homemade Christmas decorations and it sarcastically said - does anyone know anyone who makes these - I do I shouted - or at least I bet she does !

Ready for bed now. Have you finished the pessaries now KT?

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well I do not make xmas decorations!!! I did think about it once but it went no further than that! I am abandoning my earth mother role because I cannot get mince pies right and so I think that I should be stripped of the title!
I did not know about your sister...that must have been tough. Do they know why?? I am sorry.

Laura!! Hey you're back! So much shopping...my absolute fave past time!! What's Bluewater like now? Packed I bet! Charlie will be coming home soon...what date Is everything ready?? What did you get Tim for his b'day and xmas

Can't think of a thing to get Robin. He's one of those dreadful people that has no real likes or hobbies so it's impossible!

Had a busy day today. 6 for dinner (wow i'm stuffed - only joking!!) and then my niece wanted me to take her shopping for presents for her fellow 12 year old school friends. Let me tell you that was about as much fun as....! And what a challenge. She wanted 6 presents for £20 and not any old things, oh no, bracelets, perfume, colouring pens....let me say we went over budget!
Tired now.

Off to bedybies

Hugs - Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
With cards like you make and your regular Sunday cooking sessions: you'll always be earth mother to me!   Regarding Robin's present, I believe there's a website you can go to that asks you lots of questions (multiple choice) about your loved one and comes up with gift suggestions - thought I might try it on myself to see how good it was. I got DH a stocking filler cd - Dad Dancing: Party Album, as well as clothes, two autobiographies he'd hinted at and cognac truffles. Sorry I don't know Robin any better to give any suggestions. I just told my DH your predicament whilst he's doing some back exercises on the office floor  , and he suggests a helicopter....

I don't know why my sister had her miscariages - she had two - one at 8 weeks and the second at 14 weeks. She then went on to have two children successfully. Trouble is I can still remember the 14 week one and how awful it was 'cos she was not only showing but had (as we all did) thought things were going to be fine.

Saw my community midwife today who gave me loads of bumf and went through all personal questions, such as have I ever had a visit from a social worker (I said no, I haven't met Laura yet ), taken non-precribed drugs, been involved with police etc etc. I started to wonder about the type of people she saw. Apparently the most difficult to be polite to, are pregnant women who have the father of the baby present who is a convicted paedophile. I felt a bit insignificant saying no to everything and obviously now labelled 'low risk'. Kind of felt weird after all this time ttc, that a woman I'd just met was checking out whether I or DH might harm the baby! And there I was looking forward to her visit (she came to the house), thinking she wanted to know if I was nauseous or getting any pains!

Don't forget, Robert Winston's IVF final programme is on tonight not tomorrow.

Speak later. Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

HI

Gosh, they were quite scary questions!!! But I guess that she meets all sorts and it must have been a pleasure to meet you! I wish that I got a visit at home. No such luxury here!

I am worried sick at the moment. Just got my KC results back and they have gone sky high. I have no idea what it means or whether the baby is at significant risk. I just wish that I could be normal like most other people. I feel like a walking time bomb and I get so scared. I will have IVIg this week but why I have no idea as it doesn't seem to be working.

Thanks for your advice re: Robin's gift. I will research some more!! I can assure you a helicopter is out of the question!!!

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh KT - can you speak to your consultant tomorrow about it? Thank goodness you're having the IVIg this week - it seems to have done it's job so far as your bloods have been really good. I'm hoping it's just one setback and the next one will beback to normal again.

You know the consultant you saw for the nuchal scan, what's his suggestion then for high KC - just allow them to be high? Have you come across any women on here going through pregnancy or having had a baby, with high KC with or without the IVIg?

What a difficult time for you. It's just reassuring to know your baby looked so well at the last scan.

Speak soon, love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I don't know what to think. The London Dr said that the baby is at risk. The one here says it's all nonsense.

I am going to London tomorrow for IVIg - I have to do something.

I have been crying all night and I feel exhausted now. This is all so bloody unfair.

Sorry to be so morose...hopefully i'll be jolly again soon.

Hugs Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hey KT, you're not being morose, just understandably worried.  I tried reading a bit on the KC and IVIg issue, but it's such a huge area as I'm sure you've found out before me! One thing is sure though, noone is reporting a linear relationship between rising KC and miscarriage. In fact, there is no consensus whatsoever on the effects they have and whether they should be treated or not. Whilst I agree with your steps to undergo the treatment advised by your consultant, I don't want you to be scared or distressed about the blood result. Easier said than done I know!, but remember you're doing everything you're being advised to do and the only thing you can do to help is keep as de-stressed and calm as possible and believe in it.

Let us know how you get on and I hope you have chance for a good chat with the dr.

Hope you're ok Laura.

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Thank you sweety. I needed to hear that, a little bit of common sense research goes a long way - (I'm sick of  'it'll all be ok' or 'we must keep our fingers crossed')!!

I posted on the immunological board but no cigar as yet. There was 1 lady who had a baby that said the IVIg never got her levels down so maybe...

I am trying not to stress but I am very bad at this it seems. Did you see the Winston programme?? It worked for that lady so maybe i'll be fine.

I hope that you are ok. How's the eating?? bump? Sickness?

Speak, well type, tomorrow.

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

How did you get on KT? Yes, I saw the prog - obviously I thought of you straight away, especially when the actual bag of IVIg was brought in. Even DH asked, 'Is that what's KT on?' Good news about the lady who had a baby, despite her levels not coming down.

Hope you had a good tim in Brick Lane Laura? Spitalfield's tonight isn't it? Then total relaxation on Wednesday.... Write as soon as you can.

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Katey - so sorry that you are having a rough time.  Its bloody crap isn't it.  I'm so sorry.  You should be on cloud 9 not crying your eyes out at the moment. Sending you a big hug.

Well I was taken ill at work yesterday and got the horrible shakes and was burning up so went to the hospital as can't get a dr appointment.  I have a bad kidney infection.   The lady told me off for leaving it so long and said that I should have gone sooner.  So am on anti-biotics now... finish them on xmas eve!  Phew!  Worried there that I wouldn't be able to have a glass of wine with my Christmas dinner.

I did still go out with my friend in the evening we went to the thai for a change but I must admit i wasn't feeling well and once my painkillers stoppped working I had to go home as I got the shakes again.  People were all looking at me on the train.  I think they must have thought I was coming off heroin or something!!  I had to get in bed with all my clothes including my coat on!!  Was sweating all night and waking every half an hour.  So exhausted today but had a police investigation meeting this morning so had to come in.  Have cancelled my dinner tonight, feel bad as it was my idea to meet up and i think last time we were due to meet up I cancelled as wasn't well.  She'll think i'm really crap. Looking forward to going home and getting into bed for some sleep.

I have a photo of the kitten that the lady emailed me so I'll forward it on to you both.  Lily did you get the email I resent the other day?

Anyway Love to you both
XX


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hi girls well i am sorry i have been AWOL been working none stop. period has arrived at last, only took the drugs for 2 days and it came, now on the BCP till 3 days before i go and start the down reg injections 15 days before i go. only 5 weeks till i go now. i am nervous and excited as this is my last attempt. 
hope everyone is well and looking forward to santa coming.
take care speak soon      
need to sleep knackered


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Blimey Laura! The shakes?!  Hope you're drinking excessive amounts of H2O? Sorry but it's my cure for everything, but ESPECIALLY urinary infections. Yes, I did get the mail. I replied to your hotmail account. I got the fluffy pic with the cats and hamster. Thanks it was lovely. I really hope you're back on top form soon party girl!

Katey - hope you're ok? No doubt exhausted after your trip and treatment. Take care and looking forward to your news soon.

Hi Kim, glad AF arrived. Exciting times ahead....

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hey

Sorry it's late and I have been MIA.

I feel cream crackered after the IVIg so i'm writing this after a long nap and before bed!

Basically Dr has no answers. It may be ok, it may not be. The scan showed a healthy baby measuring 13.1 and I saw a full bladder (contents coming my way!!) and a stomach etc etc. So if I was 'normal' I would be very happy. All I can think now is that my body is attempting, maybe, to kill the one thing I love more than any other - how wierd is that? I just hope and pray that all will be ok.

Lily -they never said if that woman actually had the babies did they

How are you all

Laura - that sound horrid. I guess that cystitis thing was worse than you thought! I am sorry to say that your train journeu story did make me smile a wee bit - I can imagine being one of those people assuming you were going cold turkey! Bless you!

Lily - You didn't say how you were coming along!

Kim - Hurrah!

I MUST sleep now. Will be more with it tomorrow.

Night night....Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi all,
Good to hear from you Katey. The woman I was referring to (having the baby) was the one on the immunological board that you mentioned. She had the baby you said, despite her levels not coming down and up until now, yours have been great, which is excellent as the most delicate parts of the baby are now made. I find it hard to believe that with such a healthy strong baby your KC are going to win as we all know the baby is an absolute fighter, plus you've had the IVIg again and obviously your doc believes that will help too. How long before you get another blood test result?

How ya feelin' today Laura? Looking forward to the next piccy.

Hi Kim.

As for me, we've spent the day so far outside rebuilding some display beds, where we trial new plants. Obviously there's some failures, so we've been sorting it all out. Been ok as the sun has been shining so far. Just had a Polish couple visit for a Christmas tree. I love learning about other cultural traditions. Apparently they have a special meal Christmas Eve and Day. Meat free on the 24th (fish only) and then lots of different meats on the Day, plus lovely sticky desserts. They've been surprised how early their neighbours have had their trees up (eg end Nov) as their tradition is to decorate it on the 24th. That wouldn't suit many of our early customers who are desperate to return to normal asap after Chrstmas Day.

As for me personally, I'm ok. Still tired and my cheeks as always red these days. Came out in a bit of a rash yesterday which is not exactly spotty but spreading fast  . I've noticed my tummy is not as flat in the morning for the last few days as well, which is a bit worrying as it's too early I thought. DH thinks it's funny   as he knows I'm a bit nervous of anyone working it out yet. He was making bets yesterday as to who would ask first. Cheers. I'm not ready yet. 18 days to the nuchal scan.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Evening!

Blasted carol singers....I woudn't mind but the days of silent night tunefully arising from the front garden has been replaced by bang bang in the door and give us money to sing. Personally i'd give them money not to! It is just not the same as it was.

OK feel better for that!

Lily - should you be building anything Rosy cheeks or not TAKE IT EASY! I have to say that I also think that a tree should be decorated on christmas eve whilst eating mince pies and sipping mulled wine...oh the romance of it all. Robin is a big baby and he wants the tree up and decorated as soon as....I am more traditional I think.
I can see that from your business perspective the trees need to go up asap! 

Hi Laura - how's your day been Where are you partying tonight

I too am going to be a dirty stop out this evening. I am braving the fog and arctic conditions to have dinner out with friends who are off to Spain for Christmas....how jealous am I? I have noticed recently that unless I eat regularly the baby makes me get the shakes. It's horrid. All I can do in those moments is chomp!

Better go and apply some war paint....catch up later....Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Ladies,
Hope you didn't fill up too much before your dinner KT  ! When are your friends flying? Hope the fog clears....

How was the acupuncture Laura? Hope you're feeling better.

Hi Kim. Won't be long now.

Off to bed now. I cried tonight. Must be the hormones. DH held me tight. Think I'm suffering hospital withdrawals and needing to know everything's ok. Think it made me a bit worse watching last night's IVF prog which reminded me that miscarriages can happen even at 20 weeks. I keep trying to pull myself togther but I'm so desperate, I'm so scared. A lady came for a tree today with a 9mth baby boy in one of those really cuddly all in ones - oh how much I wanted to hold him for her whilst she wandered the field.

Goodnight ladies. Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily - what you are feeling is so natural and I get that panic every day. It's such a shame as it detracts so much from the loveliness of pregnancy.

Not long until the next scan and it will be fine....those rosy cheeks are there for a reason.

Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Thanks KT. I burst into tears again this afternoon   - think I overdid it food shopping this morning. For once when I got back, I just couldn't rush to put everything away (except chilled of course). I'm pooped. Hope everyone is having better days.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hello just wanted to wish everyone a happy christmas and newyear.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Lily Lily Lily.... honey so sorry I was not here yesterday. Oh I wish I could magic you to feel better.  The majority of miscarriaes happen early on... your nearly 10 weeks.  Please please try to relax...I know thats a bloody stupid thing to stay.  Your hormones are everywhere remember and you are going to be terrified until the moment you get jnr safely in your arms (and then you will still be worrying over teething, innoculations, colds, coughs..... teenage pregnancy, marrying the wrong one, grandkids!!).  I think worrying just comes hand in hand wih parenthood.  But it also comes with tons of fun and the most amazing feeling of love and fulfillment.

I spoke to my friend yesterday, Jessie is 10 days old now and she is on cloud 9.  If I'm honest I'm so so jealous of her and you two.  I want to have all this worry too!

Katey - honey you have been having a bad time too... goodness I leave the board for a night and you two fall apart!!  Come on Katey... Jnr was waving to you.... s/he aint leaving you.  You know I know these things!!!  I'm gonna meet this little one one day I just know it.

Kim - Hay love how are you doing?  Have you finished work for Christmas or are you having to work through?? Grrr!!  I used to ave o work every Christmas, I didnt actually mind but not sure in a and E would be christmasy and fun?? More just drunks being sick I guess.

Anyway... I now have a chest infection... oh what a joy.  Was meant to go up to Tims family tonight (Cambridge) but as I'm poorly I'm home alone.  Its Tims birthday.  I'm going to watch Bruce Almighty and wrap presents... oh and cough alot!  At least I'll be able to sleep without tims moaning about my coughing keeping him awake!

Anyway better get on with it I guess.

Take care
XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Sorry to hear about the chest infection Laura - now your antibiotics will have to kill 2 birds with one stone... Hope you have a good sleep in the middle of the bed  .

Hope you're ok Katey? When do we get the next blood test result?

Thanks for the Greetings Kim - ditto.

Well, I'm looking forward to a few days of doing nothing. The gifts are bought, wrapped and distributed. The larder is full and I've never been so ready to do nothing. DH has never seen me like this before. 3 months ago, he used to get annoyed as I wouldn't sit still for 5 mins, now I'm desperate to sit still. Spoke to my mum tonight who's abroad, but she didn't even ask how I am  . Maybe I won't tell her afterall and wait till she sees the huge me when she returns to the UK in March. The thought sadly gives me pleasure.

Looking forward to all your news tomorrow and over Christmas.

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily
Lucky you - I have work tomorrow and then warpping to do and then the distributions to make!!  I could do will a long lay in and a lazy day.  Sure one must be in siht for me soon.  Your sounding more positive    I'm glad.  You sleep tight and rest your body so it can concentrate on growing that baby!!

Anyone watch the animals in the womb programme?  Was lovely made me even more broody though    Since nearly 2007 and who knows what that will bring.

Katey - how was your evening? XX

Cough Cough, splutter splutter!! Night night!


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hey girls

I am sorry no typing....I have such a headache I can barely move my eyes! Please forgive my uselessness!

Lily - the tears are a good sign. I had hysterics today also because...wait for it...I had not brandied my cakes yet. Robin was lovely but he thought me a mad woman! You put your feet up because that's what baby wants - so baby gets!

Laura - you poor angel. You are so run down...because you are manic all the time! I hope that you get some time out now as you need it. Did Tim enjoy his b'day

Kim - thanks...you too.

I must must bid you farewell. I promise I will be a much better buddy tomorrow.

Hugs - Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Sorry to hear you've got the headache Katey. How are today? Your hysterics made me feel better.

Hope you've got a restful weekend planeed Laura.

I've just burst into tears again - I'm not coping very well. I printed DH off the top 100 baby names for the last 5 years, last night, as he has no ideas yet, but he wouldn't look at it and read a directory of plant businesses instead! I find out, hysterics later that he's got me a babyname book for Christmas but I still can't understand why he made me feel so stupid - I ended up throwing the list in the bin  . He's taking it out on the garden spade now.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well you could have sent it to me!!!!

That is sweet. You know, you and I are going to be hell to live with for a while!!! I haven't cried yet today but seeing as I have to go shopping for dh and I have NO will or drive to do so things may deteriorate!

Men are not great at dealing with our issues! To be fair I am being so irrational but I would never tell him that!!!

My headache is still lurking. It is most unpleasant. Last night was horrid. I suffer with headaches normally and I was told that pregnancy may exacerbate them...yes, it appears to be true!

What do you buy a man who wants nothing I am at a loss.

Lily....keep smiling poppet!!

Laura - How you feeling now

KT


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Well Katey what did you get him?? Hope you managed in the crowds. I popped to the bank and couldn't believe how rude people were in the street, barging past and bumping around. Why does pregnancy exacerbate headaches? I never have had them, but for the past week I'm getting them in the evenings.

DH fished the list from the bin and when I met up with him again, he had highlighted some names. Phew. I agree, that it's difficult for the blokes as they can't see our hormone guage or sensitivity level. Mine's very high at the moment and I sometimes think I'd be better doing this locked away from everyone.

Hope the last day of work before your relaxation begins went ok Laura. Now to the exciting gift wrapping and distributions. Will be thinking of you busy wrapping with selotape in one hand and a glass of something in the other. Oh sorry! Just remembered - your on the antibiotics! I've heard orange and lemonade is very good  .

Bye for now, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I cannot put what I got him because he is a snooper!!!!!

Not sure why it happens but those who suffer migraines and tension headaches - step up Katey - get them worse...probably hormone fluctuations! 

See how cute your hubby is...that was sweet!!!! Bless!

I agree about rudeness. I was so close to punching someone (now that woud have been rude!!!) because I was sick of being pushed, barged into and...worse of all.....dodging spit - yeuch! Why do people have to spit It is so bloody disgusting I cannot find the words.

I was so wacked when I came back I barely had the energy to sit. Better now!

Off to watch a movie.

Katey xxx

ps Laura - where are you You best not be too busy!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Well yesterday was a nice easy day at work and I finished at 3pm! Yeah, off now for a week yeah!!  We went  out for a Thai last night and it was lovely.... I have Thai fish cakes followed by spicy seafood and a auberine in black bean as a side dish.... oh forgot you two can't have seafood can you .... sorry Katey, just getting Lily back for the alcohol tease!!

I did not et up until 1pm today!! How naughty is that??  I have just finished watching muppet xmas carol (my fav!!) and am wrapping pressies.... there seems to be hundreds of them... thought i nearly wrapped them all.  Oscar is being really naughty as wel and keeps getting in the way!!

Did you get the pic I emailed of kitty??

I used to get terribel headaches when I as on the pill, stopped straight after though.  When I was preg they all started up again.    So if (sorry i meant WHEN) I get preg I'm sure I will have to deal with that too.

I'm feeling better but have a really sore belly it hurts when I touch it and when I sit down??!  Something is obviously not right down there. Still no AF.

Anyway I better get on with wrestling the cat for the cellotape!

Ho ho ho!! Its nearly Christmas!!

XXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi girls!!

What a day! Food shopping! I have to say, apart from M&S food hall, it was all quite quiet BUT everything had gone! Which amazes me because the sell by dates must be over quickly the earlier you buy?

I also noticed that it is not very Christmassy. There are hardly any decorations on houses - nearish to where I live is an area that usually is adorned with nasty OTT decorations from about October and it is bare! I think that Engand is depressed and so our relocation to the Med seems ever more definite....roll on 2 years!

You just wait Laura...the day will come when you are forbidden luxuries like peanuts, (oh want them so bad), prawns (ditto), smoked salmon, (yummy)....and you 2 will sit and ponder on the good times!!!! Do you think ,my deprivation is shining through? 

Did Tim enjoy his b'day? How's your infection

Lily - what have you been up to today Has there been a last minute tree rush I bet there are some people who wait until today. Do you have to open tomorrow

I am off to get a tiny splinter that is causing untold agony out of my foot and I will get back later.

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

hi Katey,

I'm feeling better but just got this horrible pain when sitting down.    I think I'm falling apart!!

Starting to feel a bit low.... this time last year I found I was pregnant, its going to be a tough Chritsmas but am trying to keep busy.

We have just had a row over the cleaning, I've been at it all day and he hasn't helped, been out on his bike, now refusing to do the washing up.  Silly fight but I can't be bothered to pander to him.

Anyway sure there is some rubbish on the box for me to watch!

Lily- where are you? What are you doing?  We're missing you!

XX
XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Sorry for the abandonment, I've had a lousy headache all day. Tried to read this afternoon and fell asleep. Had an awful time in town this morning: got the car stuck in a car park where someone parked after me, too close between me and the bollards, down a narrow side street where I could no longer turn round. Anyway, found a farming friend who helped me out. I'm useless at backing at the best of times, but when there's only enough room for a sheet of paper - no way! All I could think of was ruining DH's Christmas if I went back with the car completely sliced on one side - hence my confidence disappeared, especially being faced with reversing 50m. The queues in town were horrendous - I only went for a few normal things I'd forgotten and had to queue in the supermarket for 25 minutes, shuffling my basket slowly along the floor. Mental!

As for decorations Katey - we're the only ones for miles with any outside lights - and I must admit they're to highlight the trees for sale. Hope you got the splinter out and I'd love some smoked salmon too - it's a lovely starter Christmas Day. Instead we've got warm avocado, wrapped in bacon with melted cheese on top - please don't tell me I can't eat it, 'cos I'm not shopping for anything else! Ever in fact.

Glad you're feeling better Laura, although I'm not sure what the pain is when you sit down? Hope Tim's done something useful. Men eh? Some just don't appreciate what it takes to keep the house clean. Sometimes I think, if we don't remind them we could do with a hand, they think we enjoy it!

Better go - pessary time.
Christmas Eve tomorrow - yippee!

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Happy Christmas Eve everyone!!!!

Thought i'd nip in to shower you with happy wishes and say that I hope you and yours have lovely, restful and heart warming celebrations.

No I am not drunk! As if!!

I am chilling before church and then off to bye byes so that Santa comes down my chimney.

I will be away all day tomorrow and then cooking up a storm on Boxing Day (Mum's b'day) so I may not be able to catch up until Boxing evening....so, until then......hugs etc

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

I'm too deserting until boxing day.  Off to Tims sis in the morning and back boxing day with kitty jnr.

Hard day for me, as I said before a year ago I founf out was preg and we so over the moon... now look at us.

Had nice time with my sister and her little ones earlier, my mum exceled herself as with buying me the sanme tesco jumper as she did the last 2 yrs... but in a diff colour... hardly makes me feel special!!

But ot some thoughtful gifts from friends and other family.

Love to you both and hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your little bumps.

Much love to you both. XXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Merry Christmas!
        

Have just popped on whilst we're waiting for the cooking to finish (DH is a better hoverer than me) and I see you're both being entertained away from home! Nice. Hope you're having a lovely day and I look forward to contact tomorrow.

What did you both get? Were Robin and Tim impressed? I'll let you know tomorrow as we open our gifts in the afternoon. Welcome Kitty Jnr  .

Cheers   - hope you're having one for KT and me, Laura?!

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

I'm exhausted, slept on the sofa with 3 old enlish sheepdogs and ot woken at 630 by tims nephews (1 and 3).  Picked jnr up on way home she is asleep on my lap as we speak.  Oscar has been really good, just sniffing her and no hissing (yet).

The day was better than I had hoped yesterday too much happening to get miserable.

I got some Amber earrings off tim as I still have his other pressies in his car as he hasn't wrapped them!  I got a posh Radley handbag, sanctury smellies, posh watch and bits and bobs off tims mum (she is very generous).  My sis got me earrings and a jewlery box and a wash bag, tims sis got me some funny fluffy slippers and chocolate candle.  Hmmm can't remember what else its all in the boot of the car still!!

I would like to go and do some cleaning but unfortunately I have a kitty asleep on my lap so am having to watch ET! Fab!

Hope to hear your news soon!  Oh I'm feeling much better today... still no AF though!
Merry Christmas!
XXXXXXX
XXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura - wot no Katey and Kim?

So glad you had a good day Laura. The presents sound great - very feminine, but of course Kitty is the special one.   Did you see 'After Thomas' last night with Kyle the child with autism? I cried so much, it was so well done. I started crying with 'Challenge Anneka' as I'd stayed at the place in Sri Lanka where they were rebuilding the maternity unit. It was so moving to hear the losses suffered, of children being swept from mothers' arms.... Blimey - sorry to be so emotional!

We eventually opened our gifts at 4pm, and gained 9 bottles of bubbly from family and friends (DH will be alright for a while). Personally I was very happy with some jewellery, handbag, sweater, music and dvd. DH didn't get too many surprises as he'd already hinted at 3 autobiographies, clothes and music.

Anway house now looks like a bombs hit it and I better sort it out. Guests arriving this afternoon. Mostly I've enjoyed the cycle ride on Christmas Day pm and walk yesterday. Hope it's alright for me to cycle?

Hope you had fun Katey and you're not too pooped to get back here soon!

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

well girls hopw yous all had a great christmas, i had a wonderful time all my family at mine as i have the biggest kitchen haha. that was untill about 1230 boxing morning when i decided to show my sister some of my tap dancing moves and felt a rip in the back of my leg, was unable to walk and ended up in A&E. now on cruches for god know how long. its agony cant belives how daft i am. pleas let it be better soon. no more dancing for me. can you imagin it me in pjs crying like a baby at my own place of work which i am on holiday from first christmas off in 6 years and this      . i am nuts. but my work mates thought it was very funny    .


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi All

Kim- poor you!!! Typical getting the day off and then ending up there as a patient!!  Bet you got 1st rate treatment though??  I should hope so!!  Hope you are back on your feet soon!!!  Tap dancing a?? Hmmmm!!  Was there any booze involved in this adventure??!!

Lily - Cycling (gently) is fine until you have a big tum and the baby can then put you off balance!!  Sure jnr not moving about too much at the moment... well not enough to knock you off balance anyway!! But take it easy!  Did you tell anyone about bubba?

Katey- Christmas is no excuse for deserting us!!

Kitty is so wonderful!  She loves me so much I don't think I am ever going to go out again!  She follows me around and jumps on my lap and snuggles in! Oh I love her!  Oscar has been really good with her too, just sniffing her ... then she growls at him and he runs off!  He's such a woose!

Anyway I have a evening of food and games to prepare! Best get on!

XXXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

HI

No I have no excuse for desertion!

I have to say that it has been the oddest and least satisfying christmas i ever had. went to outllaws for lunch which was nice but dh's family don't really talk...i mean they speak but it's all polite and nice and no real chat.
then drove home so i was exhausted. boxing day - mum's b'day - and dh cooked an amazing lunch. they turned up late and then said they were leaving at 5 so did not want to stay for tea - which we had bought and prepared. miffed! mum said that this year i get no gifts - except some clarins stuff which she did not wrap and left the price on - because she is helping us with the IVIg (ok fair enough) but my brother got loads and she has jsut given him a bloody expensive house also (long & unpleasant story). So needless to say I did not expect anything but I was a bit p****d off anyway.

today went to buy floor tiles and then realised they cost too much.

all in all.....c**p!!

glad to hear you all had a nice time - except for Kim (you mad lady!!!).

Have we named Kitty yet? (Charlie)

Lily - did you tell anyone or anyone guess Careful on that bike in case you fall!!!

Hugs etc

Katey
ps sorry I whined but it all just got too much!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh Katey and Kim,
Both of you are rightfully deserving some tlc   .

Sorry about the accident but I can imagine your workmates thinking it hilarious! Hope you recover for Istanbul.

Katey, Katey - I'm so sorry you had such a c**p time. I personally gave up on Christmas at 13, when my father refused to put up a Christmas tree anymore (he was having a bit of a mid-life crisis) and my parents started going away every year and leaving me with my brother to watch Jaws and eat buffet food. I reckon the only reason I haven't written something similar to you this year is because we played home alone. Everyone seemed to think it was very sad and invited us to there's, but with the nausea, tiredness making me very unsociable after about an hour's chit chat and the avoidance of alcohol without telling anyone why, made us determined to celebrate alone. Before that we'd always been with family, sometimes travelling quite far and often regretted it. I appreciate how bl**dy frustrating and downheartening it is when you're the host too as sooo much behind the scenes effort goes in (eg menu planning, buying, timing etc) and when expectations or sometimes even politeness aren't met you wonder why you bothered. I had comments last year like 'Oh sorry didn't I tell you I don't like salmon or cream cheese' (when I'd proudly made a smoked salmon mousse pefectly rolled out like a swiss roll) and then telling me how they don't think starters are really necessary anyway at Christmas when I try to offer somehting else - well I do . My mother is also ace at saying they won't be stopping too long as they walk in the door. This year mum got me nothing. In the Christmas card she wrote something about taking us out for dinner when they return to England - whooppee. 

To answer you both Laura and Katey, no noone noticed or if they did, they didn't ask. We had a few people pop in for a drink, but I helped myself to an alcohol free bottle of sparkling white, kept in the fridge and just held my hands in front of my tummy. Before too long though, I think someone is going to ask if I've put weight on, or worse still they'll just presume. My time will probably come, when I see someone particularly look at my tummy and not say anything. My body warmer is definately starting to stretch.

Goodnight ladies. Love ya lots. Your kitten sounds perfect Laura! What's the name?

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Well my Christmas was actually very nice, i as expecting to be a blubbering mess throughout but seem to have just kept up the correct level of activity to keep the blues at bay.  My favourite bit was boxing day morning we got up early and took Tims mums 3 old englich sheep dogs on a massive walk, was lovely.  Stayed just long enough at Tims sisters for it to be pleasant.  I opted out of seeing my parents as they always upset me and spent few hours with my neice and nephew.  

My mum bought me the same jumper as last year from tescos! and texted to ask if they can have reciept for there pressie as didn't like it.  My mother has no idea at all as to what I like or dislike and it makes me really upset.  They have quite a bit of money but have never offered any help with us getting a house or for the IVF.  I've always been the one they wish they'd never had!  Always go into trouble as a youngster and now I only cause them worry (oh sorry parents for being ill!!). 

Sooner I move up to Derby the better.  I've been looking at houses in Matlock its lovely there.  Tim is going to actively start looking for a perm job up there and then off we go.  I will do agency work, better pay and I can take time off when I need it.

Anyway I got very drunk last night, friends came over and played Risk and Pictionary... there are alot of empty bottles in the kitchen!!  I was sick in the night so feeling sorry for self today!

Lily - I love Salmon and cream cheese!!   Ungrateful so and so's.  I can't believe you've not told anyone... I'd have burst my now!
Katey - sorry you had a crap time, next year will be wonderful I promise... jnr will be 6 months??  How cute! Then you won't have to worry about your mother as you'll be too busy being a mummy yourself!  And you lily!
Kim - hows the leg?

Anyway I'm off to tidy and then maybe of to the pet shop for more toys!!  She is called Willow, I'm not really happy with it, just doesn't seem to suit her.  But everyone else seems to like it.  I like Frank as in Frankinsense (?).

Take care girls.... do you have new yr plans?


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hello

Just quick update - Af has arrived, next IVF therefore will be late feb.  Scared, if this goes as bad as the last one that will be it.  

Anyway my chinese takeaway is here so best o enjoy that... healthy living starts up 1st Jan!

XXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well...on reading all your posts it seems that each of us has a mother problem! That's spooky! I hope that we cam learn from this!!!

Laura I had no idea that you woud be moving to Derbyshire! That's relatively close by to us so we can meet up for cream teas in Matlock!!! Hurrah!!

Glad af arrived....at least now you can get on with your plans.

Lily - where are you today It's not like you to be mia. Feeling unwell Come back soon so that we know you are ok.

Kim...update on the injury

I must say that I am the size of a whale. No joke...I would easily pass for a 7 month pregnancy. I think it is all fluid retention because my first bathroom visit in the morning can go on for a while!!! I am definitely smaller early in the day and i expand massively by bed time. It's horrid as I feel bloated and sore and have problems breathing. What fun...not.

I went to the sales today...well it was rubbish. didn't buy a thing. very disappointed! There were so many people....all spend spend spend. They'll regret it in the morning!!!

OK shower and bed time

KT xxx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

well girls up early as i have to return to hospital this morning still cannot put any weight on it   . my appointment is at 11am but it will take me this long to get ready, not very good with the cruches. I also pick up my down reg injections today from the pharmacy   . so i am all ready for the 10th. I phoned work yesterday and told sister i would be off again, i feel really bad as i have had loads of sick time this year with the IVF the M/C then the operation now this. she was really understanding but still feel awful as the ward is short staffed enough without this, and i really love my job   . but there is not much i can do to help it at the moment. newyear i fear is going to be crap, no   for me could be far to dangerous.
wishing yous all a great newyear and all the best for 2007.
kim


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Yes Katey, I agree, it IS a bit spooky or a very strange coincidence, there's a mother issue between 3 of us. I also agree we can learn from it and not carry it on into the next generation. About your beached whale look - I'm a bit worried myself. It surely is too early for all this. I'm walking everyday, not over-eating and still look 6 months pregnant. If I wasn't wearing a loose coat/body warmer when I see people they would definately ask. I've noticed I'm drinking lots of water too and still getting night time headaches. Anyway sorry for absence last night - end of year accounts: VAT etc. Also had some marketing write ups to do which are due Monday for publication - so I was a bit pushed.

I've just re-read your notes KT and noticed you've got trouble breathing when you're bloated - have you got a good GP you can speak to as that doesn't sound quite right? Hope you can get checked out.

Laura, I'm so pleased AF has arrived and you can organise what's happening. Onwards and upwards with your much better informed IVF cycle. Are you still having the acupuncture. I'm so excited for you , as the drs know a lot more about how you're going to respond and you'll also have more experience and confidence with the drug taking. Then after another drunken blast at New Year (and no doubt the odd one after that) it's detox time for our mother to be! I know I'm very bossy, but I'm just so excited for you. You know more babies are conceived in spring than any other time - so that's good news for a start!

Kim, Hope your appointment went well. Glad you're getting the down reg drugs.

I'm off to do a bit more paperwork. Have been out this am and battened down the hatches with DH ready for the big winds. Moved the rest of some delicate plants inside before they get blasted.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Afternooon!

Well AF is here in full force   but lad to know things are hopefully getting back to normal in there!  Feel like things are going to move really quickly over next couple of months.  I have college work to get done for MArch so need to get on with that before start the IVF and am on holiday end of Jan with my friend and I'm really behind at work so feel things are going to fly by.  Yes still having acupuncture, although not back til the 8th as she off over xmas week and first week back I have work stuff on late so couldn't do it.  I have been poorly both times I've been and so she is only dealing with the infections at the moment but hopes once I'm back after a week off she can start on building me up.  She always comments that my body is exhausted and I need to rest more.  I'm doing everything i can for this IVF, but that worries me as if it fails I'll have nowhere to go.

As for moving hopefully it wil happen this year although, with all this £ on IVF we may be living in this flat forever!!  We have agreed on LIncolnshire, Lecistershire or Derbyshire.  Nottinghamshire is a possible but I feel it is too close to the inlaws!

As for the mother thing, I think it will make us all wonderful mothers, Tim has had a pretty **** upbringing too, but that story is for another day.

Katey- I agree with Lily think a trip to the GP is in order, we may be worriers but better safe than sorry especially with your precious cargo... id there is pain or pressure on something it means something is trying to tell you something.  Could be the steriods?

Lily - You sound VERY healthy to me so please don't fret about the extra weight, its just water and will go when jnr arrives. 

Anyway we are off to Notts in a bit for a party, back tom, hate leaving my little muffin here all night alone... she has got very naughty today!! Her and Oscar are getting on really well so I'm chuffed about that, cats can be funny with newcomers so pleased all is going well.

Kim- Don't feel bad about calling in sick... if you can't work you can't work.  And don't feel bad about taking time off for things like m/c after that there is no way you can work, you need to heal yourself. XXX

Love to you all.
Speak tom. XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Well, well, well, wherever you move to Laura, you're gonna be closer to Katey and me - gets better each day! Get central and you can be our meet up place  . Hope you have a great party. PS Listen to the acupuncturist - I think she could really help get you rested!  

Katey, where are you? Did you consider the drs? I'm worried about you now. Write soon.

Hi Kim.

Did the paperwork (well priorities anyway) and went into town - rather unexciting apart form getting a bargain coat that should do up for a month or two. 10 days to nuchal....

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

11 weeks today!!! Congrats Lily!!!

Don't worry about me. I suffer from hyperventilation - brought on initially by stress a year or so ago. I went to get physio for it but it really made no difference. Now when I bloat I push up onto my diaphragm and it makes the condition worse. I will tell the Dr though. Plus the more I eat or drink (water incl) the more I bloat so I am restricted in the evening.

Ah woe is me!

Laura - your acupuncturist said it all....you need to REST!!!!! And yet, here you are again tearing off to Notts and then back home again tomorrow and then who knows what at NY! There is just no stopping you!!!! I'd love to say move to Leics but I really hate it so I best not! Derbyshire is beautiful. I have no knowledge of Lincs so I cannot comment.

Lily - you really are very fit and healthy!! I so wish I had your stamina to walk and drink water. I am just exhausted always (even when non pg!!!). What's the coat like

Wow it's windy!

Kim - poor you! What a thing to happen!!!

Hugs, Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Not very exciting Katey - black, quilt effect (not overly bulky though) and one size bigger than normal (I'm steadily going from a 12 to 14 for the sake of my middle). It should keep me warm over the next 2 months as my other jackets will not do up for much longer (well they will, but not without looking hideous). Anyway for under a tenner, it was a bargain. Don't know about you, but I've felt more like keeping snug and warm and so I was pleased to find it.

Not quite sure how you and I are going to get Laura to sit still for a while, not to mention sleep loads and detoxify! Good job she's not listening whilst she's at the Notts party  .

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well you guys are quiet today!!! I bet you are all out sales shopping!!

I woke up and decided to live life on the edge and so we went to Stratford-Upon-Avon for the afternoon. It was very pleasant until the heavens opened and down came the showers! The drive back was a nightmare - no lights on the M69 or A46 and so it was impossibe to see the road (no white lines in places can you believe) and the enormous puddles that we sped into. Horrid.

I did manage to get my apple liquorice from lakeland so all is well!!!

Hope you all had a lovely day and maybe i'll hear from you soon.

Hugs, Katey xxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Mmmmm....I cannot decide whether to be worried or paranoid!

Where are you all?


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Well party was nice, lovely preg lady there from tims mums work who I had long chat with.  Had the inevitable drunk uncle who shouted across the room 'so when are you gonna have a little one then' then was hit by all the aunties and dragged away, only to come back an continually drunkenly apologise for the rest of the evening, I dealt withit ok but Tim hates this uncles anyway and it ****** him off.  We crashed about 2am, the rest stayed up until 5am!!

We took tims mums dogs for a long walk and then went to tims dads and took his 4 dogs out for a long walk.  I cant wait to move to the country and get a doggie!!

The A1 was closed on the way back so took hours to get home.  Rain and driving is horrible!! Watched 'the hours' on TV, was bit slow but I actually really liked it in the end.  

I know I need to calm myself down but I do find it so hard.  I've always pushed myself physcially, socially and emotionally, not sure what I'm trying to prove and to who.  But I will try to take things easy over next couple of months.  I feel so guilty just coming home and laying on the sofa seems such a waste.  May start up yoga after new year?

Kitty and Oscar are very funny keep chasing eachother around... getting on great.  Kitten eats so much, she seems to be either eating or pooing!!  That normal?

I've not been to the sales yet, I have a meeting in Kent next Thurs so have to pass bluewater and lakeside on the way!!  I hate the crowds so should be a good time to head to the shops.

Anyway enough of my waffle.

XXXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Laura - you posted at the same time: here's my original message:

Katey, Katey, Katey      

We had a trip out too and went through similar puddles in the dark. They were very frightening I agree! A couple were just like being on the log flume and we literally couldn't see anything - no doubt you'll know what I mean. DH wanted a crosstrainer but they range in price from £200 to £5000, so we thought we better check them out first. Took a trip to Northampton to a gym warehouse and chose one (lower price end!). Then went to Hartwell for lunch and then a walk in the forest. They have a 'cute' tree top walk - I say cute as it's not very long, but was still good fun. Then rain spoiled play. Got home quite late and cooked a basic meal, then dropped down exhausted.

Where's Laura and Kim. Maybe Laura decided we're no fun anymore and decided to party everynight despite what we say!  Or maybe her legs are sooo tightly crossed in the new yoga position she's taken up, that she can't get to the pc?

How are you? I'm ok except desperate for the scan in 9 days time....

Love Lily. xx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

I was only joking when I mentioned the yoga Laura - didn't realise you were seriously considering it? Relaxing doesn't mean you just have to come home and vegetate on the sofa - it means looking after yourself and giving your body what it wants, ie, 7-8hrs sleep, exercise everyday especially in the fresh air, loads of water, fresh food and lots of laughs, hugs and kisses. Then with the stimming drugs we'll be well on our way to all being pregnant at the same time!

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx

PS Just in case you're still feeling worried Katey     xx.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well I used to do yoga all the time but I can't find a good instructor now, I'm a member of an expensive gym so to o anywhere else seems daft.  I live on a council estate and so lovely walks are not really an option.  

Anyway I'm going to beddy byes now, catch tom.

XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I should think so too!

Tired...will type in response to all your news tomorrow.

Hugs  Katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hello!!

Where are you all??

I'm off to canterbury in a bit for new year, so will catch you all tom.

Happy new year, lets hope 2007 will bea great year. XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Canterbury? What's happening there Make sure you drive carefully - the roads will be horrid what with all this wind and rain. Happy New Year Laura pops and I will pray that your 2007 will bring all your heart desires!

Lily - I went for a long (ish) walk today and thought of you!!!! I must say that the wind made my ears ache like hell! My dogs were swimming in freezing water and I could not believe how much they loved it!! Brrrr!! I'm not sure that the baby is a big fan of walking as now it has given me yet another headache to contend with!!!

How's life besides

What are you doing for NY 

we are sitting in - as usual - and formulating a 2 year plan. It will be interesting to see how we differ/agree on the way forward. Mmmm.

Kim - Hi...what news??

Anyway....off for a lie down. Will try to catch up before midnight!

Hugs, Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

HAPPY NEW YEAR ladies - this is the closest I can get to midnight due to pessary time....  

Well done Katey on the walk   . Sorry your ears got cold - didn't you wear a woolly hat? I don't go walking anywhere this time of year without one.  

Sorry about the headache too. You'll expect this from me now, but did you drink at least twice your normal amount of water when you got back? My backpack is basically my water carrier: starts heavy then lightens to nothing.

Yes, why Canterbury Laura? Hope you're having a great time.

We're home alone, although invited to two places for parties, we declined. For some reason my bump has decided to put on a growth spurt this week. I got up this am and couldn't do my reliable trousers up  . I'm still not ready to tell people, so I'm happier to lie low for a while. DH and I had a relaxing time lying on the sofa together watching a movie instead. Went for a walk this afternoon after toasted paninis - yummy.

Looking forward to chatting in 2007! Love and hugs, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

HAPPY NEW YEAR AMIGAS!!!!!

This is the year..I can feel it...well, I hope so anyway!

Lily your day sounded lovely. I adore paninis - only thing is they give me a bump I cannot blame on the baby!!

You are water obsessed! You will be angry now....but I drink very little. It's my one really bad habit. I just forget to drink. After the walk I had some organic orange juice and that was it. I know I am dehydrated but I just cannot get my head around fluids - forgive me!

Hope Canterbury was a blast Laura!!! 

Here's to 2007!

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
How was Canterbury Laura? Many fireworks? Hope Willow was ok when you got home  .

Of course I'm not angry Katey!   It's the lifelong battle I've had with friends and family when they tell me they're having recurrent urine infections or headaches, etc and then I find out that in a day they don't drink one glass of water, let alone the advised 8! I promise not to mention it anymore as it's up to you, BUT   just to let you know orange juice irritates the bladder and therefore acts a diuretic, making your body want to produce more urine and therefore dehydrate you more and increase chances of a headache. (You can skip this if you like: blah, blah, blah). The better thing to do would be have 1 part orange juice with 3 parts water and that way, you're giving yourself rehydrating fluid, glucose and minerals such as potassium - all good after some activity. Lecture over.

Have just got back from a cycle ride. Was quite pleasant as not much traffic, nor wind, and I'm now ready for our roast chicken - yum. 7 days to nuchal....

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

I'm back!  Laying on sofa now watching chitty chitty bang bang, tim has gone to bed!

We went to canterbury as Tim has a couple of friends who live in Hong Kong and are back for new year, her sister lives in canterbury and was away so they were staying at her house.  It was a very posh house in the country...very nice!

My best friend came and a few of Tims friends, about 8 of us all in all.  They did this lovey food thing, there were electric type cooking pots on the table and one was fish the other meat stock and you put your own prawns etc in and they cooked and then you grabbed them out and ate them... lots of lovely veg to cook too.  I haven't seen them for over a year so they were asking about all my years traunma and I ended up blubbing at both of them, wasn't a hysterical mess though.  Ahe is in her final year training to be an acupuncturist, so had a ood chat to her about my acu too.  

Was nice eve, sshame  blubbed but was inevitable I think, a yr ago today I started to bleed.... the start of the end.  

was up until about 6am, so shattered now but gonna hang out for a early night, have to go back to work tom and I'm on duty... which means an early start!!  I don't think I will manage it!!

Kitty is fine, she nibbling at my braclet as I type!  Oscar was sitting next to her licking her a minute ao... how cute!!

KT - You must drink water... very important!! Tut tut

I love paninis too!!

Happy New Year girls XXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I can't...I just can't! I have tried but it never works...I forget. It's not just water, I hardly ever drink anything. I must say that the orange juice fact surprised me! I have a bit of a thing for OJ since getting pg - and satsumas. Mmmmmmm.

Oscar seems to have taken very well to Willow (nice name btw). That is really sweet that he grooms her! Does she ove him too or is it more 1 sided

I am sorry that today has brought back such cra**y memories...you'll never forget but hopefully you can get some good ones this year instead. It's amazing how close our timing was. My ectopic was last nov/dec and I have thought about it a lot over the holidays so I do understand.

Lily - will you stop putting me to shame! What with walking and cycle rides I feel quite inadequate!!!!! Did you go far??
Did you have a nice ny eve Glad to see that dh and I were not the only ones who did not party....well, dh had his own wine party whilst I got on with my OJ and some tea. Wild child that I am!!!! Not long till the nuchal - it should be fine as 32 is a good age and you'll only be 33 when you give birth - as opposed to wrinkly old me who will be 35 so I set alarm bells ringing!

Off for a scan and a blood test tomorrow. It's been 2 weeks since I had a scan so I am getting withdrawal symptoms!!! Please God all will be ok.

Wish you 2 were here and we could have a NY party of our own! That would be a blast! Oh well.

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well I think you need to TRY TRY TRy!!!  No wonder you are getting headaches!!  

I didn't know that about OJ either... I love OJ too.. it has to be the proper stuff can't stand that concentate business.  I love all fruit actually, mango is my fav.

So what are your NY resolutions?  

Is that one from corrie havin an etopic preg?  just read in the paper that she has shoulder pains and then collapses.. I should be a dr!!

Think Wills likes Oscar as well she rubs up aainst him all the time.  Although they do snuggle up and then bite eachtother!!

I'm so tired!!  I really can't face work tomorrow!!  the thought of getting up in the dark to go is mind bogglin!  I may look in my diary see if I can book a day off in the week.  

XXXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I don't watch corrie any more - once they got rid of Fred it was all over for me!

Saying that....Eastenders was great tonight!!!!! Go Dot!

I only have 100%juice. I hate concentrate too. I promise I will try harder.

My NY resolutions are to be a good parent if I God does allow this pg tp go ahead (please please please) and then to lose weight and get fit. I also want to stop being a weak employer who takes shi* and kick some ass! Yeah! Oh and drink more water.

I cannot believe the christmas break is over either. sucks. when we all move to the med it will be more fun to get up and see the sun shining down on us!!! 

Night and have a good week - Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

So have you decided where you are going to move to?  Did you do your 2 yr plan?  How do me and Lily fit into your plan!!

Yes the girl in corrie did have an ectopic, they did it ok actually, it was quite dramatic..... lets just see if she is back behind the bar next week though!!  I don't watch it anymore actually but thought I'd watch thi one.  Yeah Eastenders was good... naughty sonia! does she leave?

Hi Lily - where are you this evening?

XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Glad to see you're back Laura   and sorry about all the bad memories that were revived yesterday, but this year they will be replaced by happier ones. Thanks for backing me up on the water thing! I just don't know what I'm going to do with that Katey! Hope you got through the first day back at work ok.

Hi Katey, Don't feel inadequate. I don't go far. The cycle ride was about 2-3 miles. I just like to do something in the fresh air everyday. As for New Year's resolution - I must get on with sorting out the piles of papers and books in the office that I've ignored for too long. Plus I must stop worrying about this pregnancy (I've failed already as I'm quite damp today and daren't look  ). I'm just thinking about the nuchal next Monday at the moment....

How did you get on today Katey? What was the crown to rump length? When will you get the blood test result?

Love Lily. xx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hey! Now I know you two are normally night birds, but isn't this late enough? It'll soon be pesssary time for me   and I'm so in need to hear how you both are, including the scan Katey....

Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Sorry lily - tough first day back and the computers at work still aren't working so I had to bring stuff home to get typed for early meeting tom.  Shattered.

Your right about Katey, forgot it was her scan today.  I just texted her to check she ok.  Sure she just went shopping or something.... you know how she loves a shop!!

I'm just off for a bath and get my clothes ready for tom... boss just called and is off sick tom so I have to go to his early meeting for him... groan! 

Glad you feeling more confident about jnr now, things are looking VERY VERY VERY good now!!  You can relax a bit.

Anyway i'll be back after my bath to check on you and Katey.

XXXXXx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura,
Glad you survived the first day back. I sent KT a txt too, but no reply. I'm sure everything is fine, but what a worry until we hear from her!

Calling Katey....

Have to go soon for pessary. Will log on in morning.

Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Bet you'll be glad to finish with those bloody pessaries too!!  Can you finish with then at 12 weeks?  bet you starting to get excited now about the scan... it will be wonderful!

No reply from KT for me either.  Sure she just having an early night those trips to London can be exhaustin for her.

Hope your snuggled up in bed KT and we hope to hear from you in the morning.  Our Comps are playing up at work so send me a little text to let me know you are all ok.  Sure you are fine. 

Night Night XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Forgot to say I have just had a bath and my belly is huge I think  need to go on a diet after all that Christmas over indulging!!

X


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hello my girls!!

I am so so sorry about yesterday. It was a rough day for me. dh and I had a row and we travelled to London in silence which was horrid. We made up after a long chat but I felt drained by it all. On top of that my mother pulled a stunt and her silly games got me riled. Then I found out that an ex employee was lying about me and the nursery in the local pub to my clients because she is bitter I did not try to stop her leaving (long story). So I had to contact my solicitor and start proceedings. So by the time I was able to post I just did not have anything left in me. Sorry - it is bad because I would have been worried if it was 1 of you guys. Next time (hope there will not be 1) I willl text quickly.....which reminds me....I did not get your texts until this morning! What's that all about

Any how, the scan was good. Measuring on target. KC have not caused any damage to the placenta and no placental bleeding. Phew. It was wriggling and jumping like you would not believe! Both of you will experience this at some stage soon and when you do tell me what your thoughts were - for me it was odd to see a human form doing the conga in my tummy and me not feeling a thing!! BIZARRE! It know i'm on the bed with the probe strategically positioned (my dr has the internal machine in is office) but it has to be happening inside someone else!

Laura - how has the af been heavy or ok Has your tummy gone back to normal? How's life besides??

Lily - damp! I know!!! Monday will be here soon and I think that your stress levels will reduce a lot when you get this over you - until of course you have to do the spina bifida one at 15 or so weeks! It never ends! I do detect an undercurrent of anxiety with you and I want to reassure you that it will be ok - I just know it...and Laura does too. Bless you, this is so hard. It is stressful when ttc and stressful when you have...and the next 18 or so years will be testing too!!!!!!

As for 2-3 miles....ONLY That's a huge amount! I'm tired writing about it!!

I do have to get your stamina though because dh has said a couple of things recently about my weight and fitness and I now feel like a 2nd rate citizen. He did not mean to be cruel but it has made me realise how he sees me and that hurts a lot.  Must stop now before I blub.

Kim...where are you??

Hugs to all - Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Well thank goodness for that - our Katey's back. Although, I wish you hadn't had such an awful day, but over the moon baby is fine. Yes, I am having underlying anxiety (spent today in tears with bad head), but you two are keeping me sane. My tears were also sparked by a row with DH and nowadays once the tears start, I just sob and sob  . It also feels like the end of the world whilst it's happening. Perhaps, I've made it worse for you going on about fresh air and exercise. Don't be too hard on yourself as now is certainly not the time to take up something new, except for gentle walking to prevent pre-eclampsia later on. With everything else you've got going on KT honey (work issues, mother issues and the tremendous stress of the IVIg/blood tests, not to mention normal pregnancy issues) you should have a pat on the back for coping as well as you do. I find I have to keep reminding DH how I'm feeling as there is a lot going on inside us and we haven't got an outward sign to show them. I think you're coping tremendously. As for the scan are you having internal type each time, not jelly on tummy?

Hi Laura, I'm sure your tummy's not THAT bad, but what a good incentive to start your new year health kick, preparing for your cycle. Hope work's not been too taxing....

As for me, all I can think about is the scan on Monday. I'm having some bad dreams every night which are tiring me out, but no doubt just playing out what's on my mind.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

Just a quick one to apologise for my drunk ramblings to you both yest... Lily hope you didn't mind me tellin my friedn about you and your PCOS.  She has it too and has been trying for 2 yrs with no joy... You didn't reply so hope I didn't offend??

Tim is not talking to me as I was home late and I didn't answer my phone and he was worried about me.... ops.  He is now paying me back by dissappearing and not telling me where he is and not answering his phone... what he doen't know is I've only just got in as I had to go to Dover with work and that means driving past both bluewater and lakeside on way home... hence just got in!!  he he!!  

KT - I know I've always thought the prenancy thing is dead odd... I hate it when people point out when a foot or a hand pokes out of there belly!! Very Alien!!

Lily - You are bound to be nervous for monday, but it will be fine!! I'm always right you know!

Anyway... I have to have bath and not be on the pooter when tim gets in.  I've bought him some clothes at the shops so I hope he will forgive me for being a mid-week drunken bum!

Hello Kim!

Oh and what/ who is beau jangles?

Me XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Laura - I'm confused: drunken ramblings etc? Have you sent an e-mail to my hotmail account? I will check; I only look at it every week or two. But no, I don't mind you telling your friend, especially if it helps her. Hope Tim's back - you pair  ! Finally, what do you mean - beau jangles: have I missed something? Did you get yourself anything from the sales?

Katey help! Laura's turning cryptic. Hope you've had a better day. Write soon....   xx

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Got to admit I don't get it either!

Laura I am glad to see you got home last night! I was thinking about how things would be when you got off the train. Clearly bribing Tim with kisses etc did not work!!!
What did you buy at the shops

Lily I think we are going to be at loggerheads with our husbands for the next 5 months or so!!! I just get mad/niggled/insulted/cross for any reason (although I am justified each time I think)!!! How you feeling today??

I am as sick as you like - part IVIg, part baby. I always feel cak after treatment. Roll on the w/e!

Off to bye byes

Night...Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Sorry that was a bit of a mad ramble!!

we are thinking of naming kitty Beau Jangles, we both have heard of it but have no idea where it is from!!

No Lily I texted you last night about PCOS... and me being drunk... did you not get it?

From the shops i got 2 pairs of trousers in the sale (both brown cords but different styles) and I got tim 2 pair of work trousers as he ets through clothes like noones business. an two really nice shirts that were in the sale but still expensive.  And best of all I went baby clothes shopping in monsoon ... got such a cute outfit... seeing little Jessie at the weekend I think.

Anyway the kitty has just jumped in the bath with tim so I best go and deal with the afternath!!  

Night girls. XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Aha, at last a night in together  .

No Laura, I got no text - don't know who you sent it to  . Hope Tim liked the clothes. I got some brown cords too! As for Beau Jangles? Well how much does it matter that the cat should recognise her name (having never owned one, I've no idea). Perhaps BJ for short?

Hi Katey! Trust me you will be justified: although we're hormonal at the moment, SOMETHING has to set us off  . As for me, I'm ok apart from petrified that I'm now in cutting pessary in half stage to wean myself off. Will my body take over?   Don't worry, I keep telling myself, like a mantra, your words that pessaries are insignificant for healthy pregnancies and not enough to keep an unhealthy one going. I'm 12 weeks tomorrow and at the beginning had that as a goal, now after learning more my goal has changed to 14 weeks when the placenta is fully formed. Are my goal posts going to forever change? I'm wondering if I'll ever accept it's going to be ok?

Anyway, goodnight my lovelies   Lily. xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

laurab said:


> we are thinking of naming kitty Beau Jangles, we both have heard of it but have no idea where it is from!!


Hi Laura - you must have seen the film "The Green Mile" ? Mr Beau Jangles was the little mouse that the bad guy stamped on and the good guy brought back to life


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## birdiew (Nov 2, 2006)

there's a song called Mr Beau Jangles, its quite an old one, Robbie Williams did a version on his 'Swing when your winning' (or something like that) album, so you might have heard that.

It would be quite cool for your kitty to have its own theme turn !

Sarah x


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hi girls hope yous are all well,  well i said i was so glad to see the back of 2006 then as yous know i have torn a muscle in my leg and on cruches so off work, all my plan for working extra for spending money up the swanny but we wll manage i suppose. I am so bored!!! but please let this be the only blip of this year and my las run of bad luck. people say oh you make your own luck god i am super dooper at making the bad kind. Anyway still taking the pill and start the suprafact injections on the 9th and of to london for flight to istanbul on the 25th please please let me be walking better by then. I really dont feel very confident about this tx i doont know if its just because i am down about being unable to do anything or because i know this has to be my last time, maybe i will find some positive energy lying around.
wish yous all well will keep intouch.
kim


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi!

Yes I believe that both Sarah and Tracy are correct with their Beau Jangles origins. The film 'Green Mile' makes me so so sad and dh loves watching it. Why does he have to die Could he not have escaped?

Anyway...

Do you not think that it is quite a long name for a kitty Would you shorten it to Beau or Jangles And what happened to the lovely name willow

Wish I could fit into cords - even pre pg I would have looked like a walrus!!! Jealous!

Lily - you make me chuckle! Why are you cutting them in half? It will be ok. I stopped and all was ok and how much better is is not to have to insert those wretched things!!!!!!!! I hated them.
12 weeks!!!! Congrats!!!! That is a big milestone and you can breathe a wee sigh of relief! Are you stilll feeling pants??

Kim - Don't be negative....it'll be alright! You have to be positive for the eggs and the resulting embies.

I am busy hoovering up spiders nests - yuk - and I have developed another case of plant flies and they are everywhere. I did what you said Lily and I now water from beneath so I do not understand what I am doing wrong!

Off to hoover - Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Mornin' ladies,
What's happened to our Laura? You've got a whole team of investigators on the case of naming kitty! Hope you're ok.

Katey -   I'm only doing what I was told. I was on 1 x 400mg pessary/day and was told to start cutting them in half towards 12 weeks, to wean myself off for a week. It's all a bit strange as I know you were on 2 x4oomg, then went to 1 then stopped. So, you stopped on the dose I started off at - all very confusing, but really I am following dr's orders. As for cords - they're not tight I can assure you, no siree! They're maternity ones from DP's and at the moment the brown ones are reduced from £25 to £10, they also do black at full price, with comfy, below bump waistband. They're not very plush (stupid stitching on pockets) but better than walking round with my button undone.

As for the plants - did you take all the compost away and renew with sterilised? They can harbour very close to the plant, so really needed every bit removing as much as possible. Did you spray with anything?

Tummy is bigger today, even though I'm trying very hard not to eat 'empty calories'.  Don't know how much longer I can the secret going.... Had very bad head last night, despite drinking lots of water. Slept and it went away - must have been tension and tiredness.

Bye for now. Happy Saturday!
Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily

I re potted and sprayed all the plants in the house and the one that is now infested was not one of the ones that was before. The flies are crawlinga round on the soil surface and yesterday invaded my sitting room. It was like a bad hitchcock movie! I am spraying now but will probably have to re-pot again

It is driving me mad!

It's a shame that the pessaries do not come in 200 mg format. How much longer do you have to cut them up?

I have a new symptom....excema on my right hand. It's horrid. I am using cream but nothing works. What with that an facial spots I look quite a sight! 

Hi Laura, Hi Kim (and anyone else)

Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Katey,
Better move quick, before the untreated one reinfects the others!   Just to sympathise I have had facial spots for two days now too, with one corker right in the middle of my face under my lip. Every time I go to kiss DH, he says - you've got to be kidding!  He suggested maybe Robin would like a holiday in the country whilst you and I get grumpy with each other. Sorry about the eczema...

Laura, where are you? We're missing you.

Hi Kim.

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Tell him he can have Robin any time!!!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Sorry I've not been about, i've been burying my head in the sand a bit... pretending I'm a normal person with normal stuff to think about.

Tracey/ Sarah - you are quite rght about Mr Bojangles... I have downloaded the tune onto my ipod!  And I love green mile that must be where I heard it from as I hadn't heard the song.

Lily and KT -  where do I start?  I'm feeling really odd at the minute, not sure what I can do to make myself better.  I have realised I have to come to terms with the fact I am likely to never have my own baby, I'm so scared that my IVF is nearly here... 6 weeks til i start and after that I will know if I will EVER be able to have a baby.  Tim thinks I should put it off to the summer give myself a bit more time but I don't know, I guess the sooner I know the sooner I can deal with it.  But I'm SO SO scared that it will b the same as last time.  I'm so scared.  I have two sides the intelligent one that looks at facts and that says that I don't stand a chance ...  but then there is my emotional side which can't accept that I won't ever have a baby in my tummy.  Nothing you can say will help but... well I just needed to write that.

I've just finished watching schindlers list.... why are people so cruel to eachother?  I get upset if I tread on an ant.. let alone kill someone in cold blood.  I don't understand it.  Life doesn't seem to make much sense at the moment.

I've been thinking of doing an online business course.  What do you think?  I need to focus my life on something other than having babies.

Lily congrats on getting to 12 weeks... and getting some maternity clothes!! Ye ha!!

  I'm feeling sad.

XXXXXXxxxxxxxxxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh Laura!  Watching Schindlers list is certainly not going to help your current outlook. Whilst I was doing IVF, I watched The pianist - very similar with a lot of pure shooting by the Nazis out of the blue (eg for asking a question or for being in a wheelchair) and whilst I acknowledge both to be fantastic films and must sees, maybe now is not such a good idea. We need    and not the reminder that life can be really s**t and some people so inhumane. As for your worries - they are so expected - you wouldn't be normal otherwise. I was absolutely petrified with our first IVF as we didn't even know if DH's sperm (which was far from perfect) would even fertilise the eggs. I have never cried so much as the day the nurse rang and told us they had. Up until then we'd had nothing but disappointment after disappointment. For two years the drs couldn't even get me to ovulate and until they saw I could and that it was maybe DH's sperm that was an issue we weren't allowed IVF. Being told I couldn't and may never even ovulate was heartbreaking and when they finally got some out of me, I was so nervous of every next step. I know none of this helps you directly. But remember the +ves : You HAVE been pregnant. Tim's sperm is excellent. Your first cycle went wrong from the start (mishaps injecting, not starting on the dose that's right for you, maybe not being as relaxed or prepared as you wil be this time [you've now started acupuncture]). I have really good hopes for you as I've seen so many women have vastly different responses each time. As for the online course - perfect idea. I did a web building course with the OU online: which really helped take my mind off things and it's also good for seeing yourself progress with something. Let's give it everything we've got. Katey and I are here for you all the way through it .

Hi Katey, Any more crying from me and I reckon DH will be begging Robin to exchange places.

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Laura

I must echo Lily.

The facts speak for themselves....you were pregnant so you are capable of pregnancy. Loads of IVF women could never say that going into treatment. The fact that I got pregnant helped me when my eggs were not terribly forthcoming. I assumed, rightly or wrongly, that 1 or 2 of good quality was all I needed - Hey I was right!

Secondly - and I have to control my temper when I speak of this - your clinic, in my opinion, f****d up big style. I would not be pg today - I am sure - if I had not been monitored throughout and my doses changed to adapt to my responses.

You cannot say that you will never get pg because none of us know what will happen. I am living proof of this. After 6 m/c and 2 failed IVF cycles I thought the joy of motherhood was for other people. I reacted bacdly to that. I hated God and told Him so. I swore at everyone. Cried a lot. Became very very bitter. I would not have done another cycle if Robin had not told me his wishes - and I hated and resented him so much for wanting a blood child because I did not want to do it.

All of that was fear. Fear of loss and, most of all, failure. That is why you are feeling the way you do too. It is self preservation and the most natural thing in the world.

You may not succeed next cycle. You may not succeed the cycle after. BUT all I can say to you is that your chances are good. You did it once, (without help), you can do it again. I cannot tell you what is right for you and when to draw the line...that is a personal decision a couple must make together. BUT if you do go ahead, when it works you will forget all of the past pain and life is sweet. It is worth all of the hassle and I am glad that I was brave enough to go for it again. But then I would have been just as brave if I had decided not to. It's a personal thing.

Please do not decide your fate based on 1 ectopic and a failed cycle - I know how painful both were for you but they do not signal the end of your fertility necessarily.

As Lily said...we are here and will stay here until you get sick of us! (going by past experience that may not take long withregard to me!!!).

We love you lots and whatever you decide we will support you...right Lily??

Got to take my pesky parents out to lunch now. Very late.

Hugs Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

Sorry for my moanings, I know you have both been through lots of disappointments yourselves.  I just feel so low and negative at the moment.  I really thought i would feel better after new year but i'm just getting more and more scared and sad by the day.  Maybe its all these anniversaries? the 12th is my 'rupture' date and the 24th my 'op' date.  My scar seems to be hurting which is very odd as not hurt for months... its probably all in my head?

I'm just cooking a nice roast and cleani the bunnies out and then i am going to go to the gym later.  I've spent most of the weekend in bed and I know it is juts making me worse.

Hope lunch went ok KT.  Lily I'm amazed you haven'ttold people yet.. Scan tomorrow isn't it?  I'm positive everything will be absolutely fine, are you going to post your photo of bubba... my friend on the barts web has herson the side of her posts, her 12 week one looks huge!!  

Love to you both. XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hey, you moan away..that's part of the joy of posting - to moan, complain, share, get excited, announce.....you get it off your chest. We all do all of the time and you listen to us.

You are scared, that's all. It's natural. To have endured what you have makes you a very strong, resilient and brave woman and you are allowed to be human too.

Mmm...roast chicken. We went to a pub I hate and ate cra**y food. Blah!

lily - good luck for tomorrow. Please text as soon as you can because I am in London and away from my comp. It will all be good. At least then that hurdle will be over you.

Hugs and night

Katey

ps a new pg side effect....itchy nipples - OMG they are driving me nuts!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

(.) (.) I find them worse when I pop outside with not enough layers on.  

Don't apologise Laura - I know nobody's disappointments are the same, but hang in there and we're here to help get you through. You have so many +ves to concentrate on and this is really your first proper shot at it.

Night. Love Lily. xx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
 My nuchal was cancelled as the dr that does them was off sick. I begged for a normal scan just to see if there was anything still there   and they did a quick one - and when I say quick, I mean not really enough time for DH to sit down. I saw a head and a body and was told there was a heartbeat, although I didn't see it and no photo. I am normally so assertive but I think I was in shock from being told the nuchal was cancelled. For 4 weeks, I've been waiting for it and it was my goal to undertake before I told people. Also, DH and I had planned on booking a holiday tonight, if it was ok as we start getting hectic with the business from Feb onwards. Now I'm not sure what to do. The nuchal is now booked for next Mon, but what if the consultant is away again? I'll be 13wks 3days and it can't be done after 13wks 6 days. I've tried finding out where does it privately locally, but waiting for the IVF clinic to reply. Also, I asked about flying. They said they advise women over 28 wks not to, but at my stage they only advise not to if one is bleeding or having pains. However, the dr did advise flight stockings, walking about and moving my feet asap. Without the nuchal result and seeing the baby properly, my confidence I'd hoped would be there has gone out of the window. We had planned on visiting my parents abroad to tell them face to face and relax in the sun a bit. Now I'm not sure if the anxiety is worth it. Also, I'm worried if anything went wrong I'd never forgive myself. Also, if the nuchal shows anything may be wrong, I'd need further tests.... I think I'm stressed.

Help! Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Poor you! That is jsut so bad. They could have called you...did you have to travel far

Leicester Nuffield did mine because Leicester do not make it available on the NHS - typical. It took the sonographer about 1/2 hr too as it was quite detailed and so we got to see so much and he told us then and there that all looked ok and that he would let us know for sure after the blood test but really no worries. That was a great reassurance.

If you do go there...pop in for tea!

Went to London today for a blood test. Hopefully I shoud know what my KC are up to by Friday. My blood should be over the Atlantic by now - strange!

My boobs are itching like mad and I may have to chop them off! Plus, my lunch tasted nice the first time and now, after 100 + regurgitations (sorry tmi!), I am not liking it that much! Therefore leek and potato soup is now off the menu!

Laura - how are you today? Working hard as usual I expect. Is Tim talking to you yet!!!!

aaaargh soup again!

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Had acupuncture today so home late.  Just off to watch ER... back later, just wanted to check Lilys news.... HOW DISAPPOINTING!!!  Bugger!!

Back later XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi Laura

My sentiments exactly!

Anyway off to bed so night night - I am 35 tomorrow (boo hoo) so need all the beauty sleep I can get!

Katey

xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Happy Birthday Katey!!!!!!!  you kept that quiet!!  

Ok... you two and your boobies!!  Hope your stop itching and Lily you need to wrap yours up better!!  Do they sell thermal bras?

Lily - have you finished your pessaries now?  so sorry about scan.  What does the nuchal scan tell you?  bubba sounds alive and well so I would not worry yourself too much..  I think you should tell people.  About time you started wearing your bump with pride!  Enjoy it my love.

KT - how long do you have to carry on with these blood tests?  If I was your Dr I would give you and Lily the all clear.

Anyway you two are prob tucked up in bed.  

Wheres Kim?

night night  XXX


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hi girls hope yous are well and taking care of yourselfs. Well i started physio yesterday so need to get stuck into these excercises to get rid of these terrible crutches. but it is getting better( a bit).
I start down reg injectons tonight am a bit concerned as Dr urman has told me to take 0.3iu and anyone else i have spoken to is taking 0.5iu, but i suppose all clinics have different protocols. this is the first time i have injected down reg daily i usually use prostapt the depot injection but they dont like it in turkey he feels it is very hard to stimmulate after it, so heres hoping with their regime i will get more eggs.
what a terrible day it gale force winds out there, and my guttering has fell down.


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hello all

Kim you are right the winds are shocking and they're doing nothing good for my hair!

Laura - any news on Kitty's name yet?? Willow or Jangles Hope you're feeling better.

Lily - You're very quiet. What's happening with you today??

I am glad to report that the itching has lessened so I do not look like a chimp scratching my chest! My arm pits, however, are a tad itchy but I have not ventured there yet!

Cannot write much as I must beautify myself for tonight. Dh and a few friends are taking me out for dinner...lovely but like my huge gut needs more calories!!! 

Hope you are all ok.

Hugs etc...Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hello katey-I have just missed you.  lucky you out for a nice dinner toniht... I love food and I especially love other people cookin it for me!!!  I need to know more... posh restaurant or just casual... what sort of food?  What did you have?  Starters are always my fav.. not really  a pudding girl (unless its apple pie/crumble and custard).

I am meant to be taking the cat to the vet tonight as he has a cough and tim has taken my car as his wouldn't start this morning so i have had to cancel!!  Bloody silly man!!

As for Kitty's name... well we are still in dispute, after hearing the song I was not convinced.  But Tim likes it.  So I am calling her Button at the moment... and tim is calling her jangles... so still no resilve there i'm afraid.

Hi Kim glad to see you back... good luck with the injections toniht!!

Lily - are you over your disappointment of not getting the scan?  Are you going to fly out to see your mum?  Told anyone yet?

Anyway, I'm off for a nap and then off to the gym... she says!!?

Bye for now. XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR KATEY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR KATEY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR KATEY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

            

Hope you have a great time and ditto, I would like to know all about it too!

Well done Laura for even considering the gym - Go Girl! 

Sorry about the guttering Kim.

As for me. I'm ok. Keep telling myself at the end of the day, things seem to going well and I must keep . No, I haven't told anyone yet. I'm feeling a bit of a wuss as I just can't pluck up the courage to do it - can't even work out how to say it. My auntie came for a cuppa this afternoon, so I got my new fleece out that hides all.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

So Katey - did you have nice grub.  

I've been to the gym... will ache tom!!  First time in about 6 weeks.  Weighed myself.. have lost few ounds which is odd as have eaten and drunk alot??  Hmmm.. maybe stress.  I have lost 10% of my body weight in last yr without trying?  

Lily - tell people when you are ready... I think i would have burst by now but I understand you are scared to 'make it real' like you are jinxin it.  But you will have to tell people eventually!!

XXXXXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Afternoon ladies,
What no Katey - can't be suffering a hangover? Hope all is well and you had a great time last night. Laura and I are patiently waiting to hear all about it, where you went and what fantastic grub was on the menu ....

As for Laura, big congratulations at going to the gym. Hope you're not hurting too much. As for the weight loss: did you need to lose any? At my clinic, they have a poster on the wall, saying that if one needs to lose weight and loses 5-10% it significantly increases chances of ovulating. I know that doesn't help you directly as you need IVF for other reasons, but it presumably improves a woman hormone profile, which is obviously helpful.

Off for lunch now. Have either of you got a health grill, eg George Foreman style. I was thinking it might inspire me, eg quick omlettes, grilled meats/veg, toasted sandwiches - are the grills any good I wonder. Since having the nausea I've really gone off cooking.

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Where are you two - Katey, Laura??

I've just had a big cry this afternoon - currently not speaking to DH, who is cooking dinner, so maybe things will improve....

Just found out from a previous best friend's mother that my friend is giving birth this weekend and I didn't even know she was pregnant. I'm feeling so sad that we lost touch (we last spoke last year before she conceived, but she was a bit aware of my situation and maybe being protective not telling me, but now I'm really hurt). I so wish one could turn back time.... Deep down I'm over the moon for her of course, but I so wish I could have known earlier. I contacted her today and it was very emotional.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily 

Good for you for makin contact sometimes it can be really hard to make the first move.  She prob didn't want to tell you and then it felt too late to tell you..... so did you tell her about you  You feel better after your cry? XXX Hope you and DH are talking again soon. X

KT - we need to know about your grub?  And of coure how you are generally... but tell us about the grub and your birthday news!!  maybe Robin has whisked her off to a psh hotel after the meal??  

Oh and Lily my MIL has one of those cooking thins... she uses it when doing a BBQ etc for extra meat... I've never eaten off it as mainly they do meat stuff but it looks nice.

Tim is at the vet with the oscar, I ish I'd taken him, worry tim won't tell him all the things he should (I do worry!).

Anyway home all eve so chat later XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Oh Lily I forgot to tell you about the new sort of IVF I read about in the guardian on sat, they mature the eggs outside the body so no injections or egg collection etc.  Theyare only doing it on people with PCOS at the moment.  I hope they extend it.  Someone has posted a link on the main IVF Board think the title is  'you girls should read this'.  have a read. XXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi there

Well! The restaurant, rated as 1 of the best in Leicester, was - in my opinion - pants! The food was too pretentious (hare shepherds pie for eg) and it took too bloody long to arrive. Whein it did it was ok but not mind blowing.
In addition 3 of our party, robin incl, were up being sick all night. I was sooooooo lucky to have escaped that!

I am being whisked off to a hotel on Friday! Very excited!!! (shame there can be no bedroom gymnastics on the menu as Dr has banned it!).

I agree with the weight loss greater fertility theory. I lost 17lbs and finally hit the jackpot! Put it all back on mind! 

Lily - I know that your friend keeping shtum (sp) is hurtful but people do not know how to be around infertility especially when they are pg. I lost my best best friend because of that. Don't take it to heart it's just the way it is. Yo speaking to dh yet

I do not have a George Forman but I hear they are very versatile and healthy. I say spoil yourself! I got a waffle maker (bad for waistline) for xmas. I am yet to try it out but soon.....

Laura how is Oscar? Hope all is ok. The egg thing sounds very promising. Where do they get the eggs from if there is no egg retrieval? Sorry for being dense. That would be a huge breakthrough.

Must go get some rennie - so unpleasant!

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

What they do is take a scrap / piece of your ovary skin away and pop in a dish and administer the hormones there, you have thousands of eggs on the surface so they take a tiny piece and can grow lots of eggs without risk to the lady.  Hope they can do something for me soon. 

Ahhh... sorry about the restaurant.  Tim likes eating Hare as its always free range, he had it once when we went somewhere and was told to look out for the bullet!!  

Oh nice weekend away.. how lovely.. maybe you'll get some good grub then?

Why are you not allowed to play 'hide the sausage??'. Surely that you are 16 weeks (yeah!) you should be fine??  Are you allowed to do other stuff? Or is it penatration your not allowed??  Sorry being nosey.  What about you Lily?  Are you allowed to?

I've had my dinner but am still hungry... may have to go have a nose in the cupboard!

XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

oh and why was everyone being sick?


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

They were sick because they got food poisoning at the restaurant!

I have no idea why I am not allowed to play Dr's and Nurses with Robin. My Dr is REALLY strict....NO baths, sex, orgasms, exercise for more than 20 mins....it is so hard. I am not usually madly keen on hide the sausage but now that I cannot I am really keen!!! I gues he is being cautious.

That egg thing sounds fantastic! What a great idea!! An ovary biopsy. Are they doing it in this country Can you not have it yet? Bummer.

Lily - you are quiet! When is the scan

Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Lovely to see all the chatting!
Sorry about the restaurant Katey, although we still don't know what you ate - are you a starter or dessert girl, or both  ? I prefer the starter but find less choice in pregnancy. Good news about the hotel. As for sex and orgasms - I did ask and the dr/nurses said it's ok for me as long as I've no bleeding or pains and it doesn't hurt. I can understand your anguish (absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that), plus now you're in the second trimester I read you're supposed to really feel like it. Personally, I'm going through stages of being too tired to 'wanting it badly'. We've given it a go since week 8 - no penetration for first two weeks (orgasms only), but we have had sex two or three times (very gently only), although it's very different: doesn't feel at all like before. The first time I orgasmed I was scared and in the back of my head told myself I was being self-indulgent and shouldn't, but it felt so right and snug   and lovely and once we'd done it once, it gave me confidence that maybe the baby was happy to stay intact. I read that the baby quite enjoys the 'vibrations'. Mind you it remains a special occasion. Since reducing the pessaries though, I've backed away a bit as I think I'm wondering if the baby will still hang on  . Anyway, I can't believe you two got that all out of me - good job DH isn't looking over my shoulder, he'd be so  .

Interesting info about the 'egg biopsy' for PCOS sufferers - wouldn't that be so good. I'll have to read the post you mentioned. How's Oscar? I bet you're hungry after all the exercise yesterday....

DH and I have sorted things out - he even rubbed my feet whilst we watched some tv (NHS prog and Fd drs on channel 5 which I preferred to Dr Gillian). But no, I didn't tell my friend about me yet - I'm still waiting for the nuchal!

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

You know whatever you say here stays here...it's like a confessional and somewhere that we can go but our boys cannot - unless we say so!

You're so brave. I am scared to have sex since my Dr said no but I know that it is safe so it is a silly rule! I really miss that closeness. I will ask him again next time we meet.

Laura - you did not say how Oscar was.

I ate the most delightful goats cheese on toasted circles with grilled plum tomato skins on the side and a salad. Mmmmm. Then it was fillet steak (well done) because most other things I am not allowed.

I declined dessert but had latte and a strawberry dipped in choc.

I do like dessert but the older I get the more I prefer starters. I have a sweet tooth so that is surprising. I am a sucker for bread though and usually I am full before I start because of the bread basket! (Although I do not recommend baskets as they can be stringy!!!!).

Off to bed

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girl!

Where are you all??

I can't believe the conversation went to sex and I missed out!!

Oscar is much better today, he is on eye drops and anti-biotics... I hate giving animals medication he is quite good with the tablets but the eye drops takes the two of us!

I had a row with my boss today.. first time ever.  As you know we moved office before xmas and we had a seating plan.  My comp had been set up on the desl opposite where I was meant to be sat, I asked if I should move and I was told to sit where my comp had been put so I unpacked and have been happily sitting there last 3 weeks.  Today I get told I have to move!!  Its all because one of the others moved on purpose to a 'better' desk and now the rest of the team have moved in they have complained about her doing this and they said I moved as well so I was called in and told to move.  I said No as I thought it was ridiculous especially as the women who i've 'swopped' with only works 2 days and is not office based and doesn't care what desk she has!!  But I am feeling a bit hormonal and stamped my feet a bit and said I though it was ridiculous.  My boss keeps popping in now to talk to me and i'm giving him the cold shoulder... took me an hour to move my stuff and had to pull all the desks out etc to move the computer wires etc.  Grrr!   I was so angry!  He even walked up the end of the corridor to my office and said goodnight which he never does.

Anyway thats my boring day at work... got a coshy one planned for tom, nice visit near home at 10am and then cshy home visit at 3pm so should be done by 4pm at the latest... lovely!  then its the weekend and boy do I need it!!

XXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well that's office politics at its best! What a waste of your time!!! You were right to kick up a stink!

I too have a cosy day planned tomorrow at my swanky hotel!!! I have instructed Robin to get strawberries next to the bed - my sex substitute!! Cannot wait!

Needless to say I will be absent until Sunday - I hope you can bear it (!!!!).  I will try to get to a comp before then but I may not. You have my mobile anyway so text me if you want to....'cause i'll miss our chatting!

Lily - hope you are ok and let us know all the details re the nuchal as soon as you can. Did you get a rating?? 

Off to let dh straighten my hair - takes him an age but I could never do it.

Hugs Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Laura, how frustrating and what a waste of time. Thank heavens you've got an easier day tomorrow - roll on the weekend. By the way, join into the sex conversation anytime - it was you who started me off!

Katey, your hair looks good  - how lovely Robin is to straighten it for you. I do hope you pass by a computer over the weekend as we'll miss you.

As for me: We had the scan and it was lovely. The dr printed off 4 photos (1 of whole body, 1 of hand about to go in mouth, 1 of heartbeat [140bpm] and 1 of head only) - I'll add one to my profile as soon as I can. The Down's risk is not high, however, I don't have a rating yet. DH and I are so relieved that the baby looked ok and bouncing about - it was most memorable to see the legs moving like it was cycling - DH thinks it's a boy as it was so active . Saw my GP today as well and she was as surprised as much as you two, that we haven't told anyone yet - she pointed out I'm not going to be able to hide it for much longer (was she implying I've grown?). Have invited two friends round Saturday night, but I think I need to practice saying it - I just can't imagine saying the words. DH is still apprehensive and doesn't really want me to show the scan photo, which I'm finding it hard to understand as I'm proud of it.

Well, bye for now, hope you're still up.
Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily

You are passed 12 weeks, your scan looks excellent and baby is on track. I know that it is hard to say the words but there's no reason to hide it any more. I feel like a fraud when I talk to people because I am still sure it will all go wrong but I am letting the world know anyway because I am proud of tot and I want to tell everyone about him/her.

Celebrate your pregnancy now!!! You have been through so much you deserve to shout it from the roof tops.

I am so pleased all was good. Congrats.

Katey xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily

I guess it is just me and you tonight!!

Wonderful news about the scan.. I so hope and pray one day I get to have a scan of a little one in my tum.  Things really are looking so good for you now.. I want you to tell people!!  Practise today and tell your friends tomorrow!  I have had so many dreams about telling people that I am 12 weeks pregnant... I so pray it will happen.  

I guess I need to get a move on with sorting out my drugs for the next cycle.. I am going away the end of jan and should start on the pill mid feb.  Need to do a bit of shopping around to get the best deal.  I'm so scared of getting them as it means I'm starting again and worried.  I've been thinking alot about using a donor in the future, really don't know if i can deal with it.  Still should try to focus on this IVF and worry about 'what next' after.

You been up to anything exciting today?

My boss still being lovely to me today..I'll see how long I can drag that out for!

Well I've been to the gym again today, now having a glass of vino and tim has gone to collect the chinese!!  MMmmmmmm!! 

Speak soon. X


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura - how's the Chinese? They always make me sooo thirsty, tasty though. Do you eat the prawn crackers?

I tried telling a couple of people today, but it was very strange and not at all like the dreams I've had for 5 years at all! As a scientific person, I found it difficult saying something that I didn't have total evidence was going to happen. I have had a panic ever since that I shouldn't have said anything. I really wish I could wait until the baby is born, as it's so scarey. I can understand you thinking I'm mental and should just relax and enjoy such a wonderful time, but with every day that passes I simply feel blessed that things are still progressing. Saw my sister today and her miscarriage was actually at 15 weeks, not the 14 I thought I was nearing....

I understand your need to think ahead, ie about donor options, but you really haven't given your own eggs a proper chance yet and we already know that they can be fertilised by Tim's sperm. Therefore, they only need one really good egg. If this go doesn't work out, do you think you'll give one other IVF clinic that you have researched a go? I certainly wouldn't have gotten anywhere if I'd stayed where I was first sent.

Well done for going to the gym - what with that, acupuncture, eating well and total concentration on this IVF - it can work. Just to let you know, one girl on here has the orange spot to download which I put on as a screensaver. Everytime you look at it, it's supposed to send positive energy (orange is colour of fertility) through the brain and down into your womb and ovaries. I looked at it everyday and breathed deeply! I also filled the house with orange, eg orange flowers, sweet potatoes, pumpkin soup, peppers and totally thought of my 'womb energy' every time I looked at them or ate the foods. Hope you don't think I'm barmey, but maybe it helps focus the body?? Worth a try eh, as it doesn't cost much.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Boo!

I'm back. We feel exhausted which is hilarious as we havn't lifted a finger for 24 hrs! It was a very welcome break.

Laura, you gym bunny, you're putting me to shame!! Well done!!! your boss obviously has a guilty conscience...mmm I should think so too! Where do you source your drugs from I wish I had done that.

Lily - don't stress too much about the 15 week thing. After 12 weeks the m/c rate goes down to 1% (unless, for example, you have killer cells...lucky me!!!). What happened to your sister was tragic and I cannot imagine how she handled it but it does not mean that the same will happen to you. Plus the scan shows a perfect pg!
How are you feeling otherwise Are you going on that trip you mentioned

I forgot to say that I got my blood test results back. The levels have gone down but 1 is still raised so I shall have more IVIg next week. Yee bloody hah! I feel better that the numbers are lower though. I have my first hospital scan on Monday - about time! I wonder if it will be able to sex the baby - I so want to know....Now, there's a debate - what would you 2 want To know or to wait

Laura - you will see your precious bundle on a scan one day but you will never believe it's really in you - I still don't!

Hope you're having great w/e's

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Katey.... whta are you do'in back??  I thought you away til Sunday? Please don't tell me you are interupping a romantic weekend away to talk to us!!

Lily - I'm sure I didn't call you mental!!?? I DO honestly understand the need to keep it to yourself.. although i THINK by 12 weeks i will be confident to tell people.  Bt I'll have to wait and see I guess.  So how did your friemds react hen you told them?  Please Lily don't feel bad you want to hide it as long as possible... you are just dealing with your own insecurity,you have been through alot remember. XX

As for finding out about the sex.... hmmmm..... I just don't know. I think I would like a surprise but then I think nah I want to know. If I did find out I don't think I would tell people.  The scans are so much better these days that I honestly think even if you don't ask,you will see for yourself.. a few of my friends who have not asked said they had a suspicision as they clearly did or didn't see the boys bits!!

And the trick with a chinese is to find a place that doesn't use monosodiumglutomate (?) as that is what makes you thirsty.  I do eat fish so yeah I would eat prawn crackers but didn't have any last night.  I had spicy veg rice, Thai fish cakes (my fav) and kung Po Prawns. Mmmmm!

Anyway I need to get on with cleaning the rabbits/ hamster / cat litter... the joys of running my own small Zoo!

XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi

I just want to be selfish and rant...is that OK?? (like you have an option!!!).

Last night we went to our lovely hotel and during dinner we discussed our marriage, the baby, life in general..... and it became apparent that dh has animosity towards me...grudges if you like. He is moody because he thinks I am trying to change him. Like he used to drink a lot and I would have him falling asleep on the sofa every night and there was no 'us' time. This was harder because I do nbot drink - I hate being out of control and my father was an alcoholic so I just never took to it. So we had many many words and he agreed to drink at w/e's only and have 4 cans each w/e night (his decision not mine to put numbers on things) and now he is mad at me about it. He says that our love life has dwindled because he has no voice - what a crock! I feel so sad about this.

Now tonight he has organised we go to his friends in Notingham for dinner after being out last night and he won't drive because he has a phobia of driving on main roads. So me - pregnant and exhausted - has to ensure another night out for his drinking pleasure and I have to drive home in the early hours in gale force winds and rain.
I just feel so hacked off. I love him so much but he is very very selfish some times.

He is hovering so I have to go.

Katey xxx

sorry for moaning!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hmmmm... well I have to say I hate it when tim gets 'silly' drunk, really drives me nuts and as I've told you before about tim and his drinking as a mask for his feelings.  He hates me talking about and hates it if I bring up his dad (who is an alcoholic).  BUT saying that I am a bit of a drinker myself and we enjoy a bottle or 2 on a friday night. I feel drinking is fine at the weekend and socially.    I did myself in my student days drink most night and looking back I think what a waste of my time!!  Its hard as th more you na the more of an issue it becomes.  Can he not go to Notts on his own on the train?  The you can have a lovely relaxing night in?  As for the driving.. maybe he needs to deal with that, i used to go out with someone who couldn't drive and it used to drive me completely nuts.  Not sure Ive been much help.  I think agreeing weekend drinking only (unless there is s midweek special occasion of course).  I do think drinking is something that you have to kee an eye on, often it is just habit that makes you drink, I have cut my drinking down this year an amazing amount and must admit I enjoy a drink even more as not the norm.

As for tonight, don't be bullied, if you are too tired don't drive, you have bubba to think about. XXX

Some exciting news from me - I have just been to the shops to buy bakin trays etc to bake some cakes tomorrow.. gone for a lemon drizzle cake!!  I've never baked a cake before but as I got some fancy kitchen scales for xmas I thought I'd try it.  I'll let you know how it goes.  We are off out for some grub... think prob a italian.  mmmm.

Hi Lily!! X

Catch you later XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Thanks...sound advice.

I LOVE lemon drizzle cake....my fave recipe is Nigella's.

Let me know how it turns out.

Went to Notts and had a pleasant evening until I got period ache and then I panicked etc etc. All seems ok but I cannot help but freak out.
Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
What a surprise renuion!

Em Laura, I can almost taste that lemon drizzle cake....

What a tiring weekend you've had Katey - I don't know how you managed it! I just can't trust myself to drive at night at the monent as I'm so sleepy - you're a very dedicated wife (hope you know who's watching over your shoulder  . I didn't manage to get on here yesterday as I was so pooped just entertaining at home, let alone driving so far. We invited a good friend (lady in her 70's) over for a cuppa mid morning to surprise her with the news (she loves babies, but lost her husband 10 yrs ago and misses him terribly). Anyway I said, look we've got something to show you, and passed her the scan photo (I'd taken a photo of it, zoomed in and printed a 6x4 print) - she unfortunately didn't have her glasses on and said what is it - a cat? Oh great!

Next my sister came round with my two young nephews and I tried the same with the 8 year old - who thankfully said a baby (I was getting a bit worried). I managed a short nap before preparing nibbles (dips etc) for the evening. We invited our best friends round and it all was lovely, but by 10pm I had a headache but continued to put on a smiley face until 11pm when they left. I just don't know where you two party animals get your stamina from?

I think it's good though Katey that you and DH had a good talk - better than him going silent. I believe that it's ALMOST impossible for a woman to go through the fertility journey (which doesn't end at conception) without the man feeling hard done by or resentful in some way. After the third year of me watching every drink DH sipped, testing his bath water before he got in it, asking him to take another vitamin pill, changing his underwear and booking when we had sex, he asked how much longer we were going to live this this? Stupid question really and when I suggested a 6 month break from it all so he could get as drunk as he wanted etc etc, he changed his mind. Sometimes I wonder how we got through it. It was difficult for him to see other blokes living, in comparison, 'reckless lives' and having babies easily - made his brain say - that what he was doing was just living like a monk and for no reason. Even now, it's still hard as we haven't reached our destination yet, so there's still so much anxiety about the risks I'm willing to take (eg flying, when he's desperate to go get some sunshine before we get busy again), but it's helped I went to my GP who pointed out that if we went and anything went wrong, I would NEVER forgive myself and so gave me supportive advice to not go - which helped DH as it wasn't just 'me' being paranoid. I totally understand your feelings about alcohol, for even if we weren't ttc, I also wouldn't enjoy DH falling asleep every night. There's other reasons to keep it in check than fertility (as you pointed out).

Are you going to ask your consultant Katey about sex now you're in the second trimester? Obviously you mustn't feel pressured into doing it, but you did say yourself you're quite fancying it and it is a good way to get close. When I don't feel like it (like at the moment), but DH does, I sort him out in other ways  , which seems to keep him happy and makes me feel less guilty too (not totally altruistic!).

Well bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Just a quickie as I'm busy baking!!  Drizzle is in the oven as we speak.  Trying to find a recipe for just normal cup cakes... yo think I can find one!  I gotsome choc chips and want to make some little cup cakes while the new scales are out!!  God knows what we will do with all these cakes once they are cooked but Im having such fun!!

KT - Glad last night was not too bad.  How far are you from Notts?  I may be driing up to see SIL next sat night as she has split with her partner of 10 yrs and has moved back with Tims mum... I SHOULD go but to be honest its such a long drive and I'm not sure I can be bothered... that sound mean??  And don't worry yourself over the period pains, I've read thats just your uterus stretching.  Just means jnr is rowing.. yay!

Lily - So chuffed you are telling people... and so what if your baby turns out to be  cat!!   I love cats! You made me chuckle about the hand shandy's!!  I do that too if I'm not in the mood.. keeps him off my case for a bit.  Maybe you could engage in a bit of that as a compromise KT?

Talking of which my two are going crazy today, Oscar must be feeling better!

I best get back to my cake search!!  XXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Just an update - the lemon drizzle was perfect! Well nearly, tim gave it a 9 1/2 out of 10.  I lost half a mark for not cooking it wearing just my apron!  Men!

The cup cakes were not as good, taste fine but i didn't put enough mixture in each case so they it flat!

Any way...where are you two?


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

So Laura, what an Earth Mother with all this cooking! You made me laugh with Tim's comment about the apron.   Wish I could try some lemon drizzle cake  .

How are you Katey? Hopefully resting....

I'm ok, bit worried as I had some different discharge today which worried me escpecially now the pessaries have stopped and I've got some aches down there too. Oh how I wish this had been a natural conception, so I could just relax and enjoy it....

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

IVF may not be the ideal way to start a family but it will be your ideal family!

I can't be much help with the discharge thing hopefully KT will be along soon to reassure you.. why does the fact it started as IVF make you think its more risky than an 'ordinary' preg?  Surely this one is stronger as was pick of the bunch?  Don't worry yourself Lily.... jnr is fine.  Trust me i'm a dr.  (wellI'm not actually a dr but you know what i mean!)

Where is that KT?  Your right she is prob resting up after a couple of hectic days.

XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I cannot advise on discharge until you describe!!! Sorry but pg means no dignity!!!

I want cake!

You 2 have been busy chatting. Sorry MIA but it's sunday - family lunch day. I had a bit of a trauma. My father is not that great physically and he suffers a lot with falling. Anyway...long story short...we were at Asda (hate it there) and I was standing with him whilst dh, mum and niece were off being busy and dad turned and went flying. He was looking all scared as he fell and looking to me to help but I couldn't (it was too quick and I couldn't risk trying to catch his weight which made me fee bad). Some people heped me get him up but it was really disturbing for us both - in different ways.

Apart from that the day was ok. af aches have gone but I am experiencing what I can only describe as a sensitive pain in my bladder/lower uterus area. It's been like it since week 8 or so and no-one seems to have any idea what it is. It is there a lot if I bend over or need the loo and less so when I am standing. So I think that pressure makes it worse. I am guessing a nerve or the bladder being pressed on What do you think?

Laura - pop in if you drive up!! I am in Leicester so only 20 or so miles south of Notts.

Lily - you've told people!!! how did it feel It's harder telling the first person and I think it gets easier. A cat indeed! No offence Laura, I have 2 myself, but I do not think a cat in a baby grow would look at all fetching!!!!

I have a scan tomorrow. my first at a hospital so i amquite excited. Up until now the scans I have had have been London ones (internal) and the downs scan at a private clinic. So this should be quite an experience. I get scared the night before, just in case..... 

Wow! I am rabbiting...sorry

Off to shower...Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Welcome back Katey!
Sorry to hear about the pains - could it be a urine infection? Mind you I do get similar pains when I need a wee and I'm now having regular reminders that I have something there, which is a bit worrying. Get another opinion at the hospital today - do let us know how you get on with the scan. I haven't had an internal one since week 7, even week 8's was the jelly type. They're much more relaxing as you get to keep your clothes on, albeit that they get a bit messy sometimes. With the last one, it was a young male dr and it was so funny as he was so swift, no sooner had I got on the bed and unzipped my trousers that there was his hand tucking a paper towel into my knickers, like a napkin into my shirt! I thought to myself, hope your foreplay's better than that love  . As for my secretion, well it was a very tiny bit (10p piece size) yesterday and this morning (but not rest of day) - like tea stained coloured. Then ok thereafter. Very worrying, but I'm off for a scan this afternoon too, so I'll ask them about it.

Hi Laura, I'm more worried as it's IVF as IVF does increase miscarriage rates, although I'm not sure if that's in early pregnancy or throughout, plus we had ICSI, which increases them too. Also, after going through 5.5 years of hell to get here, I'm so nervous that I may have to go through it again and I so need something to go right after so many years of it going wrong time and again as I'm sure you will totally appreciate.

Bye for now.
Two scan results coming up tonight....
By the way - we were on last night - all for one and one for all - although I missed it.
Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well I watched our film!!!! It is soooo funny! Makes me chuckle.

The scan was lovely..there was the cutest foot. he head was pressing on my bladder hence the strange pain apparenty. Hope so.

I have to have a glucose intolerance test - which sounds pants - and a neural tube defects blood test.

My obstetrician (sp) was really cross - again - about the IVIg and said that he wants me to cease treatment immediately. That was helpful.

Speaking of which - watch panorama tonight (8:30) about IVIg etc and how it is a con. I am not under Mr Taranissi but the chap I see used to work with him. It sounds very negative - edited well then!!!

Lily - let us know how you got on.

Laura pops - is your boss still being dreamy how was your day Did you watch the 3 muskateers last night??

hugs all
Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Katey - glad you've got an explanation for the strange pain. Are you attending the ARGC? I do hope they paint a balanced well researched programme. You must be so stressed about the IVIg? Is the glucose intolerance test routine or did you show some sugar in your urine? I have to have the NTD blood test too. As for my scan it was good, although we were kept waiting for 45 minutes with a full bladder, then he decided to press nice and hard. Apparently I was the first patient with a proper full baladder - he'd had to send the two in front of me out again to fill up more. The baby kept getting hold of its head   and at one point jumped like a penguin - now I'm worried - is it a cat or a penguin?

Hey Laura - how's your boss? Are you still giving him the cold shoulder? Have you got your IVF drugs sorted yet. What about acupuncture - is it still on? I've dreamt of your cake all day. I mentioned it to DH - the bit about the apron made him chuckle! Heaven knows what image went through his brain!

Anyway, best go get something to eat.
Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

Wellyou two and your scans!I'm jealous!  I may go rub some cold jellyover my belly just so I feel included!!

Glad the scans were lovely...are you going to put your scan pics up as your avatar?  I've not seen your baby since it was just a little dot KT and not seen Lily Jnr ever!!

Been out all day on visits so not seen boss, he is always really nice to me to be honest, if I'm honest I work with alot of crappy socail workers and I think he is scared all the time I will leave. I have my appraisal next week so will prob mention how I need a change... gotta keep him on my toes a!

Yes was Acupunture tonight... not sure if its helpin or not, guess it can't be doing any harm.

As for Panarama .... Oh that MR T is a naughty man!  So cheeky about using the clinic next dorr for the 'duff' patients!! And all that money he was getting off all those women.  I'v definately scrubbed him off my list.  As for the IVIg, it only said its not been properly researched, not that it didn't work.  Is anyone running some trials about it?  I'd need to know more, it was interesting what the lady said about the killer cells.  I'm sure you have read into it and know more than me KT and if you feel it is helping you and bubba then we will support your decision.  I wish lovely Robert had told us which clinics he would send his relative to!  

No I didn't see 3 Muskteers!  

I'm going to see my friends baby tomorrow.  Bit scared, I can get a bit emotional about these things sometimes.

XXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Oh Katey - I cannot begin to imagine how you are feeling. Did you try telephoning the no at the end of the programme to discuss your clinic's practice? Is it more common practice in America? I can understand you having faith in the treatment as your 15 week scan shows something is going right. Do write as soon as you can and let us know your thoughts.

Laura Hi! I will try and put a photo up. Well done for going to your friend's tomorrow. I actually avoided babies for at least 4 years, but I did find when I was unknowlingly put in front of them that it was actually lovely.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily

My friend will be fine even if i do blub... she is a fellow IF lady, 7 yrs she's waiting so she will understand.

KT- where are you?  

I'm off to watch ER now, last week Abby had her baby early and they had to give her a hysterectomy and the baby is ill and may die.... so that will cheer me up a!!! 

XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Well well well (3 holes in the ground).

It was disturbing watching but not as disturbing as the unedited version that can be watched on the ARGC website. Especially at the end when Mr T told her that she was an irresponsible journalist for not putting both sides and that Panorama had used other spy patients and not used their testimony because it didn't suit their purpose. Tut Tut BBC!

Yes I am afraid and my catch 22 deepens. I have written to HFEA and the GMC and tod them to put their money where their mouth is. If IVIg is so bad then, I told them, they should ban it or accept that they shoulder the blame for future damage also.

I am s'posed to have it tomorrow. Cannot bear the thought of harming the baby but scared that I will lose if I do not.

Lily - your pic is gorgeous!!!!

Laura - cold jelly You nut! How was ER??

Katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

You go girl!  You tell them!  Good luck tomorrow sweetie, I may watch the unedited one on the websit once I get my broadband sorted out.

Lily - babe looks a cutie! 

I'm off to bed, night night.  

Prob not around tom as friend cooking me dinner etc.


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Well done Katey. Your fears are totally understandable and I agree with what you've written to the HFEA and GMC too - it should be banned if they feel so strongly about it. Whay ARE they letting drs prescribe it if they shouldn't?

Thanks about the pic - shall we see one of yours? I'm keen on comparing the tummy as I was nervous about putting ours on - don't you think it looks a bit big? I mean it looks like one of those silver food covers you see on Tom and Jerry with the little handle at the top.

Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Ha ha ha!!Lily you make me chuckle.... silver food dish!  S/he looks perfect to me. XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

You are really are so kind   .


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Laura - hope the meal was good; what did your friend cook?
Katey - where are you? When's the next hospital trip: this week isn't it?
I'm very tired today as did a bit more physical work and it was so cold outside.
Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls!

Well not much going on here is there??  

I think KT had her IVIg today, I guess she is tired after her trip to London.

We just had pasta and salad, was tasty I love pasta.  Had nice glass of wine too.  She really was amazing, I think she likes me, every time I given her to hold she snuggled in and nodded off.  She is just getting into new born clothes.  I helped bath her too... she has a very fat tummy!!  Loved it when I was there but now feeling sad. Why me??  Why can't i manage what every other women in the world can manage?  I'm feeling some chocolate is needed.  My mate bought me those after eight sweets... maybe I should eat them!!

Hope your resting Lily after your hectic day... don't over do it!

XXXXxxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

HI there

forgive me please....too tired to play tonight (had IVIg which knocks me out) so thought I would quickly type in between sleeps!

Lily the tummy is normal - our one is huge!! Robin sais it takes after me... ha ha . The 'handle' must be the cord

Dinky!!

Laura - how was dinner You have so many lovely meals prepared...I want your friends!! Do you hire them out?!!!!!

I had plasma and saw baby who is now too big to fit on the screen if I have an internal scan so all tummy from now on.
I will post a pic when I figure out how to take one without getting a bright flash area...how Lily

Catch up tomorrow...Katey xxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

update....

Laura - yoour evening sounds divine! Don't fret...it will be you...promise!

katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Katey, Glad you're back and thanks for reassuring me about the tummy. To take a picture of the scan without a flash area, I placed the photo on the windowsill in daylight and then the flash didn't automatically come on. Alternatively, you should be able to manually turn the flash off. Also, don't have any artificial lights on. I can't wait to see your photo: please do one soon - PLEASE!

Laura, I reckon you should see your friend more often as it could be possible that by holding the baby and feeling maternal, it helps your hormones ready for IVF - she sounds like a lovely friend so I'm sure she wouldn't mind!  

A friend came round this am at 9 and seemed so sad she'd found out from someone else our news. Trouble is excuses mean nothing and I feel bad. It's hard to explain that the whole thing is so scarey and we're still trying to gain confidence ourselves that everything is going to be alright. We've only told parents, brothers, sisters, 2 aunties and a few close friends and that's mainly because they've popped round so we showed them the scan and said here, have a look at this.... I just can't bring myself to telephone anyone and say the words still. I think she was ok in the end and has offered some baby things. It's a difficult stage I reckon, as there's now a 6 week gap before the next scan where we're told they will look in detail at the organs etc, but in the meantime there's no real signs that things are ok - sickness has improved, won't feel baby movements for few weeks yet and all I am is a bit fatter. I know I'm being stupid and paranoid, but I am really finding it hard to accept everything is going to go ok (I do so wish I hadn't taken over 5 years to conceive - maybe it would be easier if it had been quicker), although I am trying to think good things...

Better go, I'm supposed to have come in to do some paperwork and it's lunch soon.
Love to you both, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

All normal feelings. I am desperate for movememt to reassure me and I scan every other week! I am still a walking disaster area the night before a scan just in case...

You are nearly 14 weeks!! That's fantastic!!

I feel sick today. Think it is the plasma...I always feel pants after treatment. All I want to eat are oranges!!

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

You really do have a thing about oranges! Have you tried taking that photo yet?

How's work today Laura?

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hurrah

Got a pic on althoug it is blurred - sorry! You can only see 1/2 a leg incase you were wondering where it's gone!!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Yippee! Great picture Katey! Thank goodness matching tummies....

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Yep...2 silver platters!!!!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well I'm feeling abit left out with your silver platters..... I just tried to upload a picture of my lemon drizzle cake but my comp just can't handle pictures at the moment.  

I've had nice day, drove to surrey for a meeting, its beautiful there and was a lovely coshy day. Stopped at TK mAxx and got myself some holiday tops and some new jeans.  Oh and some nice undies.

How are you two?  Anything exciting happending with you two??

XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Nothing exciting here. Preparing for an OFSTED inspection - oh the joys!!

I so so so want that cake you speak of. The reason it could not be uploaded is because I, for one, could not take the pain of seeing but not eating!

I love TK Maxx. A girl was stabbed to death at my local one so it has been closed for a while. Horrible.

When's the holiday??

Katey


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

girls i wrote a huge big note to yous earlier and its lost in cyber space. the jist of it was your scans are great so clear. i am fine still jagging away. go in one weeks time have to go to bank and transfer my hard earned cash tomorrow dont like this bit but it will be worth it i am sure. take care everyone
love kim


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Kim, Sorry you lost the note! Hope everything is going to plan - now it becomes very exciting.

Evening Laura - is the photo file too large maybe? I'd love to see the cake (sorry Katey!). When and where's the holiday?

Em KT - OFSTED inspection - fun not! Maybe you should nip to the supermarket for some lemon drizzle cake before they arrive.

I've spent the evening updating some ebay stuff - plants aren't such good sellers on there at this time of year, but I'm at least trying to put temptation their way....

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

what's your seller id...I would definitely buy some stuff! (text it to me...please!!!!) I really want to grow peonies and lavender and roses. I am trying to create a romantic garden ... blousey almost. Any advice

Kim - good luck and thanks for your kind words

Katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

had a crap day at work so left early.  Feeling bit poorly (cold) and knew there would be train trouble.

Holiday is next friday!! Egypt.  Can't wait so need some sun on my bones.

KT - sounds like you had a dull day!

Kim - wow its come around quick, good luck, I agree the most painful bit of IVF is parting with all that money!!

Lily - how do I get my pic smaller?  On the other board I use one of the other girls sorted out a photo of my cat to the right size so i could put it on.  Any IT advice?

Feeling bit achey so gonna go have a nap.  Had no sleep last night cos of the wind.  I'm so grumpy when Im tired!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I'm not feeling great and have an early start in the morning.  I will catch you ovely ladies tomorrow as I'm off to bed now.

Night night. XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
What a horrendous day and unfortunately we had to work out in it! Normally we have the radio on outside but that would have been a total waste of time today.

Katey - hope you survived the inspectors ok. How are you?
Laura - I could sort out the photo if you send it over to the hotmail account. However, I think you should give it a go first -
Presumably you have saved the photo onto your computer ok? Open My documents and find photo in the file you've saved it in. Click on the photo once and details should come up about its size etc. I always make mine less than 100KB (file size) so it loads faster and more easily or check the photo size, ie number of pixels, eg my photo measures 770x750 pixels (when the pixels are less, the file size is less). It's better if the longest edge is less than 1000 pixels. If it doesn't show the details instantly, then right click on the photo and click on properties.
I am assuming your photo is bigger than this. Double click on it and your pc should open it up into whatever photo programme you have on your pc. Then it's a case of changing image size and/or cropping photo (it's a good idea for FF photos if you crop the photo to taller and thinner than 'landscape' type as it then looks bigger on your profile). With my programme, I go to the image tab (in Paint Shop Photo Album) and click on resize. Change the length of one side of the photo and the pc should automatically put in the other length size, thereby keeping it in proportion. Hope that is ok to follow?

Hi Kim, not long now before your all important trip.

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Evening

Laura I hope you feel better tomorrow. Sounds like you need a hot toddy! I think you are right...you do need some sun because you have been run down recently. Just the job...Egypt! Always wanted to go there.

Hi lily - I'm fine. You??

No inspectors yet. We never know when they will arrive but we know it is soon. I have been nose at the grindstone all day today checking I am happy with everything. I am exhausted!

Tired now...off to sleep

night..katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

I'm not having a good time.  I've had another barny with tim and he is now driving to Notts in a bit and so I have the weekend home alone.  Its ok I have lots to do and am quite looking forward to having a restful weekend with no arguing.  I still have a cold and have such bad PMT... what is wrong with me??  I never get that bad PMT but my hair is greesy and i'm spotty and can't seem to talk to people without having a arument with them!!

I was on duty today and kept being rude to people on the phone!!  Its so not like me.

I think a couple of early nights may help... and absence makes the heart growfonder as they say!!

Kim-when are you off?  Its this week sometime?

KT - don't exhaust yourself... I'm sure you have your house in order so don't worry about the inspection, I used to quite like the inspections when we had them when I worked in residential.

Lily - Thanks for the IT lesson... I will attempt it over the weekend!!  I don't think you should be out in that wind... I don't want a tree to blow over on you!!  Stay indoors in the warm.  XXXX

Any ideas for gtting me out of this horrible mood??

XXXxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh Laura!  
Did you see The Truth about Food last night - it was pretty rubbish, but did show an experiment on ladies with PMS, which was interesting and the dr involved is now going to carry out further research into it. Basically their symptoms improved after adding extra calcium and vit D foods to their diet, ie milk, yoghurt, cheese (they ate lots of cheese), and oliy fish. Worth a try?

Have just got in form a hectic day, and DH is calling as he's made coffee: so will be back later...

Love Lily. Big Hi to Katey and Kim....


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Sorry so late...was hooked on Big Brother and then mum called....

Laura laura laura - don't apologise for yourself. Sometimes we just have those times when we want to scream at everyone who dares to cross our path - for me every other day! It will pass. Hormones can be a real pain and you will still have the loitering effects of the last IVF in your system. I recommend chocolate...works every time.

Happy 14th week Lily. Like Laura said....be careful of this wind when you're playing outside.

You are right, Laura, my house is in order but it could always be better...in an innovative and forward thinking way. My issue is I have 20 staff and they just have a clock in clock off mentality or they get moody if you dare to ask them to get off their backsides and earn their money. For example, I asked everyone about 1 1/2 weeks ago to submit ideas about making us better, ideas for events.....and so on. Today was the deadline and 1 person had bothered. I was so mad. Even the 3 managers had ignored it. I know they are busy but they could have come to me and said, hey we may not get it done on time. But no. Typical. If I had behaved like that in London I would have got my P45 quicker than you could say pret a manger. Different worlds.

That is why I am exhausted checking all is done...which is not my job but...

Moan moan...sorry girls.

Off to the shower - Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

I'm not having a good time...still.  Tim came home last night, not sure what time as I was asleep. He didn't go to Notts as he wanted to race on Sunday, nothing to do with me.  I apologised this morning for being ratty and then he got up cleaned the cat litter and said he'd done his share of the cleaning and was off to buy a new computer??!  We don't need a new comp, in fact we have this lap top and a mac that time bought 2 years ago and tim has never even tried to connect it up??  He had 3K saved last jan for our house deposit and his mum gave him 5K a couple of months ago, I asked him how much he has saved up now and he said about 5K  so basically he has just spent the 3K he saved up??  I am so angry.  I seem to be responsible for everything except the cat litter and producing sperm. I can clean my own cat litter box and you can buy sperm.  I don't think I can cope with this relationahip any more, I used to feel like this all the time but since the ep I guess I've put up with thins as I didn't want to be stranded with no sperm.  BUt I feel so stressed and he is just making me feel worse.

This just isn't a partnership, I am being a mug.  Sorry had to vent... is this just hormones or do I really need to consider a split?

How are you ladies?


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

well...that's a bit of a question to ponder on a saturday morning.

The answer.....easy.....if you don't know then stay put! I say go to egypt, away from IVF, work, cat litter etc and see how you get on. life has a habit of sucking allthe fun and love out of relationships. I want to leave robin every other day.

I don't want you to be sad. I think a hoiday is just what you need. 

I have got to pop off....have bought a 2nd hand doppler and need to collect.

Hugs...Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura - oh dear! I agree with Katey - the trip to Egypt is perfect timing and once you're away from the mundane duties of life, you'll be able to think clearer. What's Tim saying about all this? Has he got a trip booked himself? There must be something in the air at the moment - DH and me had a huge row this morning about our pond! I cried and cried and it took two hours before things were better. I'm so sad it happened and worry I've caused the baby harm as I've had a secretion since, albeit clear?  

Hi Katey, did you get the doppler - any good? Sorry for all the hassle at work. I find the problem with employing people these days is it can be so hard to get rid of them! We don't have many staff, but the main way I see fellow employers doing it is by upsetting people enough and not supporting them so they end up leaving of their own accord - not ideal, but sometimes motivation techniques just don't work on some people. Not quite sure what to suggest with 19 out of 20 though! Maybe a weekend orienteering together??  

Well this weekend hasn't exactly gotten off to a flying start, wonder how we can jazz it up? I'm currently hunting online for a heated towel rail - can't be doing with chasing round shops.... Really I should be shortening some mat trousers as I'm fed up with walking around with my button undone, but I'm really tired today - I will try tomorrow. Either of you girls a dab hand with the sewing machine?

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Cannot sew BUT I am getting good with a doppler and I cannot recommend it enough! Get one!!!

Laura hope you are feeling better.

K


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Its saturday night am I am typing up case notes??!!  No the day hasn't got any better but I guess at least I'm catching up on my work!!

Hope your weekends are goig better than mine!

XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies.
How's your day been Laura? Hope you're doing something to pamper yourself after working so late last night....

Katey - Hi. Put that doppler down, you'll wear it out!

Love Lily. xx
Been busy working today as tomorrow talks of snow showers and we had an order to prepare. So glad we're now indoors and awaiting a scrummy chicken casserole.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Well I have had without a doubt the most  dull weekend in history!!!

Today I have been sortin out the bedroom/ wardrobe, I woke up in one of those moods and now I wish I hadn't started.  Half the stuff is still on the floor so can't stop.  My cold is a little better today so hopefully I will be fit and well for Friday.

Are you two ok?  I'm feeling this thread has lost its umph a bit.  Maybe you two are now feeling and more confident in your pregnancies you don't need to come on anymore?  Thats fine I don't mind, I have friends on the other thread who are still trying so you won't be desertin me!

I weighted Jangles today and she has put on 1 kg in the space of 3 weeks??  Thats seems alot to me, I think she may actaully be a lion!  I emailed you both a pic of her yesterday so have a look when you et a chance.

Me and Tim still not great, he is cooking me dinner at the moment I think as a bit of a peace offering but not sure how long it will last!!

I have also today tried to work out my IVF schedule as have supervision tom and need to book the leave.  If I've worked it out right I should start stimming on the 19th March and EC should be easter week, hope the bank hols don't mess things up.  I've booked the whole lot off from 1st scan to about a week after EC (I think).  Seems ages away initially I thought I would start sooner than that but with bloody AF not showing up for months its now going to be in april.  We have to use our leave up by 31/3 so I'm hoping boss is still in a good mood and lets me carry a week over so don't have to start using net years leave.

Anyway I best get back to sorting out. XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

If you have booked off from 1st scan to EC...how long is that!!!!!!?? fantastic!!! Plus -an here's the religious person in me coming out - ET around Easter would be amazing as it's all about new life. Aaaaaahhhhhh!

I also wake up feeling industrious and then regret starting - that made me laugh!

Laura...you are a nut job! We will not leave you no matter how hard you try to be rid of us. I am certainly not confident and won't be until I am holding a real life baby that is 100% fine. I think that, on my part, I have had less oomph is because I am snowed under with OFSTED and work stuff and it all just makes me down and tired. Plus we are established chatters now so we probably take each other for granted (a bit like a relationship!!)- sorry if I am. 

So it is Jangles then I got the pic and she is HUGE. I was expecting a teeny kitten still. You are right, there are lion similarities.

Lily - where you find that energy I have no idea. I could not be in the cold working with plants on a Sunday. I can barely get my rear out of bed at the w/e!!! You amaze me! Take it easy!

I stink of smoke (thanks mum) so must go and wash it off.

Catch you later

Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

I'm not trying to get rid of you!! But at the same time i think I am holding you two back.

Its only two and half weeks off, remember my rubbish clinic is not scannin me until day 9!! So hopefully I have worked it out fine, I don't want to tell my boss about me having the IVF again, so I hope he doesn't say I can' t have it off.  Its over the school holidays and its the end of the leave year so always a bit tight, hence why I'm booking it early.  Oh and I was chuffed about the easter thing too, all those eggs floating around must rub off surely?  And in my book it says the best time for IVF is the spring, so fingers crossed.

Well I got 1 bag for the charity shop, one of recycling and one for the landfill!  And I haven't finished!  And then as Tim bet me £10 that I wouldn't go to the gym this weeend I had to drag myself there too, just got home feeling all fit (?) and well steamed!

Shatterd but feel I've achieved something this weekend!

Lily - where are you??

Have to go tim is putting on a dvd. XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi and morning!!

Off to London for tests so absent until late.

Catch you later - hope you are all ok....Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Laura, You're holding us back from WHAT? I certainly have nowhere else to go and appreciate our thread enormously. In terms of feeling confident with the pregnancy - utter nonsense. I feel just as petrified now as I was last year and am still knicker checking every time I go to the loo and am scared stiff of having a stillborn or baby with learning difficulties (we had ICSI and there's not 100% proof that as they chose the sperm to inject that is was the best). In terms of chatting to family/friends now that is also not happening as I have not told anyone about the treatment and for my otherwise very 'fertile' family, they would not appreciate one bit my worries and scares -  my mother got pregnant on her honeymoon and my siblings have had vasectomies now they have 'enough' children. I have been concerned that it is difficult for you, especially during tough times like you are having now, to carry on chatting with us, but hoped so much that you would as I know both Katey and myself are so keen on helping you through the next cycle.

Can't really apologise for lack of entry over the weekend, other than being completely knackered and not even turning the pc on last night. The wind and cold took it out of me. I fell asleep very early on the sofa. I agree with Katey that as we have become such friends over the last few months, I also take our relationship for granted and enjoy the contact on a loving, casual way.

I've been worrying this weekend about you and Tim, and pondering it a lot. Trouble is, only being with the two of you would enable me to make a real decision, but as a woman, I'm not happy about how you're being treated and being left to feel. I'm wondering if he's talking much about the relationship, or just avoiding discussing it? It's also bringing back painful memories of mine from yrs back which lasted 8 yrs and was so difficult to resolve as I got so down and felt such low self esteem that leaving him became harder. I'm so pleased you're going on holiday with a friend and hope so much you can stand back from it and discuss it with your friend. I'm worried you're so sad at the moment and can't help thinking about my motto, that Life's no stage reheasal, you only get one chance as I know you'll know already but sometimes it's good to remind yourself.

Must go, busy day ahead - not with anything to do with pregnancy only work!

Love Lily. Hi Katey. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I did not know that Laura was going with a friend! Where was my brain when we had that conversation?!!!!!

Oh. I was hoping you and Tim were having some warm and sunny times. Best book another holiday....yeah!!!!!

Hi Lily too!

OK - I think dh and I have gone potty. We are hating the nursery so much that we are thinking of baling out and selling our house and using the money to get a cheaper mortgage free house and use the rest towards buying 1 or 2 flats/terraces to rent until he qualifies in 2009. What do you think I would need to find a way of generating an income too...maybe work from home....but doing what

The stress is too much and the financial rewards are pants.

Have we lost the plot?

Katey


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
How did it go in London Katey - any results? I'm in full support of your plan. In my book if you're not happy, you do something about it! My brother-in-law did a similar thing, except he does the flats/houses up and then sells them on. Emmm what can you do from home though? Perhaps an answer many people out there would like to know! But I'll think about it.

Hi Laura. How's the day? When do you leave for Egypt? How's Tim being? I'm a bit concerned Katey's going to be home alone for a week, as we're off on Thursday for a week. I'll try to get to an internet cafe Katey - promise!

Very tired after a very chilly day. So glad to be in the warm now. Wore four layers of clothing, so my abdomen was kept warm at least.

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hang on....you are both going away I am not a happy bunny.

dates from you both please so I know when i'll be friendless.

Katey

ps only had tests today so no results


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Sorry I did not mean to moan yesterday about the lack avalibility of your good selves over the weekend.  It was just because I was feeling low... sorry!  I feel I can be a bit of a burden sometimes with nothing but miserable and bad news.  I feel like that with my friends as well.     You two should be in the happiest part of your lives and im just hear moaning.

I had my appraisal today and I was really negative with my boss, I told that I hate my job and hate having to be responsible for social worers who are incompetant and he asked if I was thinking of leaving and I told him I wasnt sure... he was horrified and offered to take some cases off me etc.  Got my leave all booked now  

Mean to be at college tom morning but havent done a thing of my course wor so not going to go.

Had my acupuncture tonight, so feeling tired.

Tim is cooking me spagetti and vegie meatballs which is one of my fav dinners.  He is not a bad man, he is lovely in loads of ways but he is a bit of a nightmare dealing with me when I'm upset, he went out on friday and sat in the forest and made a bonfire and got drunk.  he just can't talk to me about all this ivf emotional stuff.  i don't know how to get him to talk to me... any ideas?  He gets drun or goes out on his bike if he's upset.

No AF yet, I don't want it to be late this week as I have my holiday!!  But the acu lady said she wants to lengthen my cycle (its 25/6 days) to 28 days so maybe its worked  

KT - what tests did you have today the KC one?  I am on my hols from friday for one week, but won't be home til early hours of the morning.  Yes Im going with my friend as tim didn't want a holiday for financial reasons, although he admitted he regretted it now.  

Lily - I didn't know you were going away??  Where are you going??

Anyway my dinner is ready, cant believe how late it is and I have stuff still to do!

Love to you both... sorry if you thought i was grouchy at the weekend was just I thought you were just popping in out of pitty for poor ole infertile Murtle!

XXXXXXXX
XXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura,
Glad you got your leave sorted. I can assure you KT and I aren't popping in here just for you, it's as much for ourselves.... Trouble is I'm so tired and now we're getting busier again I'm quite pooped, plus the weather isn't helping keep me awake....

In terms of communicating with Tim re IVF and emotional stuff, it was same for Dh and me on many occasions. He found it hard to appreciate why I didn't want to go a Christening or why a tv advert made me sad or why I sometimes felt like I couldn't cope anymore. To be honest, help came when we saw the hospital counsellor (every IVF dept has one - or should have) and for the first time we both said things openly in a calm, coherent manner. She also got us to discuss certain issues and score 1 to 10 certain areas of our lives and how we as individuals felt about them in terms of happiness and contentment and we were able to work on them and see how they improved, eg fertility, health, work, relationship together. When I first booked the appointment I intended to go on my own, but DH came with me and was invited in when we sat together in the waiting room. We were both so glad he did as I was amazed how much he needed someone else to talk to too. It was the first time I saw him cry....

Well on that happy note, hi to Katey! and put that doppler down!

Sorry Katey, but we're off day before Laura and return next Thurs. We're off to sunny Devon. As we decided not to fly, we decided to head off somewhere we've never been. We both love the coast, walking and nature and we've got an apartment overlooking dramatic cliffs, apparently with binoculars sitting by a large scenic window for watching the ships.... As long as it's cosy, we'll be fine. It will be good to have a break.

Bye for now, Love Lily.xx Must catch up on the VAT before we go....


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

So....what you're saying is from effectively thursday/friday I am home alone Well that's just charming. You 2 must be in cahoots!

Getting Tim to talk...now that's a tricky one. Not sure what to say...can I take a raincheck and get back to you when I have considered it more

Lily - I cannot put it down. It is compulsive! You wait until you get one!!!!

Night - Katey

ps Yes KC tests


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Don't worry Katey, I'll be on the lookout for a cafe! Please don't tell us it's Robin's weekend in London too - I'll cancel!!

Laura, I just checked my hotmail account and can't find the photo. I think maybe it went into Junk/Spam folder which gets deleted every 5 days automatically by hotmail. Could you resend and I'll look immediately please! Let me know when you've sent it.

Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily - as it happens it is Robin's w/e away! 

I know Laura sent it because I saw your address next to mine....and this puss cat is worth seeing!!!

Had an ok day. I have caught a cold and my throat is sore - but I cannot take anything!! Feeling sorry for myself.

The GMC have written to say that they cannot help us IVIg women as they do not regulate treatments - so ho the hell does!

How are you 2

KT


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh no Katey - I'll tell DH it's cancelled right away unless he promises to find me an internet cafe! Don't the GMC give any other help or advice, or suggest who to talk to? Have you found many girls on here having the same treatment? Sorry about the sore throat - early bed tonight and lots of fluids!

Laura - hi! Can't wait to see the kitten. How was the day? Have you got much to do before your trip, or have you an easy week planned?

For some reason, I've had the biggest headache of my life today, all day. It goes a bit when I eat and then comes back even worse. I just want to close my eyes and sleep. Just a little more to do on here, then maybe I will. Although, I've still one pair of trousers to shorten (I've saved the best to last) - I've finished one pair though: was so impressed I got the machine working! Does that mean it's my turn to be earth mother now?

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Oh yes you are indeed Earth Mother!!

Rest!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Where's Laura? Busy searching for last minute necessities maybe? Sun cream, flip flops, condoms (oops sorry Tim - didn't know you'd be looking!).

Finally my headache has gone - don't know if it was DH rubbing my feet or that tiny piece of chocolate  .

What's the current thoughts on the house selling then Katey? Does DH work with you in the nursery whilst studying then? I hope you move East and Laura moves North East!

Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls

Ive not had a great day.  My hamster died when I got home today.  Went to the forest to bury him.  He was 3 so very old for a hamster but i still feel sad.  Also had SIL on phone she split up from her partner of 10 years couple of wees ago, he has Mental Health issues and has just phoned her aying he is coming to collect the ikds for a week in scotland and she is scared and doesn't want them to go with him, which i understand.  So bit of an emotional evening.

AF arrived this morning so should be fine for my holiday so thats good.

Also  had my hair cut after work.  My hairdresser is 8 1/2 months pregnant and so i had her big moving belly in my face!  She is lovely and so excited... made me jealous! One day I know!

My K has just fallen off and so if there are any letters missing or things don't make sense its probably a K!

As for Tim, he came counselling with me twice and it was really good but then just refused to go again.

I am working from home tomorrow morning and so will email you some more pics then.  I was meant to have the whole day off (I meant working from home!!) but I have a Adult protection meeting at 2.30 that I have to go to, so I have to travel all the way into work just for an hour meeting.  

Hows the dopler KT?  I have a picture of you walking around with it strapped to you!! So are you going to get one Lily? 

Anyway I need to go pick up trousers from the cleaner (I paid to have them taken up.... sorry!!), sort my insurance, book the parking, pack, go to the shops to buy some clothes!! So not too much to do??!!

Oh KKT any ideas about working from home?  I would love to do something from home.

Oh and Tim has seen a job he is going to apply for in Derby shire so if he gets it..... Ah.... bit scared to be honest!!

Lily where are you?  KT is in Leicester?

XXXXXXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I am down to 4 dopplers a day and my aim is to get that to 2!!! I cannot walk around with it, unfortunately.

Laura I am sorry about your hamster. It is so hard to say ta ta to our beloved pets. It will really upset me. Sending you hugs and a large mug of hot chocolate xxx

Lily - I think it was the chocolate...works for me!

KT xxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Morning you three lovely ladies 

Just been catching up with your news and had to pop on to give Laura a massive hug  You are going through a rough time honey, my heart goes out to you it really does. You could put a little post on the Relationships board if things are really getting on top of you? Amanda, the Mod for that board, is a trained counsellor and will give you some sound advice!

Big hugs to you all
Love
Tracy
xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Tracey - Thanks, thins have been a bit tough but I thin alot of it is me and I'm starting to feel anxious and worried about my next IVF and DP is not great at dealing with my negative emotions.  He just doesn't know what to do and so goes out! Men!

Lily - Hows the head today?

KT - Mrs Mouse(the hamster) was very old, could hardly walk and at the weeedn I was thinking of taing him to the vets to be put to sleep, glad he died in his own bed, shame I wasn't here giving him a cuddle though.  Still very upsetting.

We are a tad better, I'm feeling very stressed about work and the holiday (just getting things together to go) I wish i could control my anxieties.  

Care Notts emailed today to tell me I'm through to the next round of there free IVF trial, I had to fill in some more forms to see if they will still take me now I have had that rubbish IVF go.  Bet they don't want me now.  

Oh well if this go doesn't work Tim and his super sperm will have to o to Bourne Hall, they offer a free o if you donate 10 buckets of the stuff!!   Well probably just teaspoon's full!!

Anyway I have some urgent work to type and have to o and collect my trousers from the shop as well before headin into work.  

Brrr cold here today... snowing.... is it snowing with you two as well?

Not too many dopplers remember KT!!  Try get it down to 3 today!  

XXXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,
Just to let you know I've emailed you kitty pics again. XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Thanks Lily - I sorted my photo too!!! (so much for workin rom home a!)


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Got the pics...lovely puss cats!

Bo has got incredible ears!!

KT


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Laura - I got no pics!   Can't understand it.... Love the one on your profile though - hope my info helped. I'm so pleased you're away soon, it sounds like you need the break so much! Sorry about the hamster and your SIL. When you're away though you must promise just to think of yourself for the whole week  

Katey, do you know why I'm not getting the pics? I even checked the spam folder.... Hope you're well today. I went to the GP as on top of the headache yesterday, I've been dizzy today and nauseous again today. I was so worried it was my bp and wanted to check before our trip. Anyway, turns out I've an inner ear infection making me feel sea sick and off balance. Glad I went, even though they can't prescribe anything.

Well, not sure if I'll be back on tonight, as I haven't packed yet and I'm starting to feel tired. If not, love to you both and have a great holiday Laura. Won't be long before we're back together again.  

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Oh Lily!!! I'm missin you already!!  I forot to ask where is Deon are you going?  I love devon, I'm in PLymouth and Paington w/e of 16th Feb.  Oh I love it!!  Have a fab time.  Are you staying somewhere with a log fire Will be lovely.  Have a great time!!!  As for your emails I will double check I've saved the correct address for you.  Hmmmm!!!

KT-I am worrying about you being on your own for the week... I too will attempt to get on but I don't think my travelling partner will be up for visiting a cafe to be honest.t maybe the hotel will have internet??  But I will have my phone and text you both!!!

I've just been tesco to get my books and now just nipping to lakeside to buy a couple of tops for the beach.

I'll be back on later KT, I'll be around for another night!!!

XXXXXXXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

well I am beginning to feel abandoned!

the fact that you 2 are jumping ship is bad enough without telling me about packing and shopping! How green does that make me!!

Lily - sorry about the inner ear. It is awful to get ill and not be able to take anything. I have the cold from hell right now and feel soooooooo miserable and poorly but I cannot take anything either. It sucks big time.

I do not know why you are not geting the pics...I definitely saw your address on the email. That is really confusing. Positive I am wrong but a wild stab in the dark....is your security cookie think set too high 

Laura - how was shopping What did you get?

I will be having a scan on Friday and MAY find out the sex but seeing as you 2 are not around.......

Hugs, Katey

ps Have a great time both - although I am sure i'll hear from you before you go. Be safe!
xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I may be on the plane when you find out the sex BUT my mobile will be on as soon as I touch down... wow can't believe we will know for sure you are having a girl!!  Oh and Lily your having a boy! Psychic Laura!!  This friday? or next friday??

Sorry you are poorly KT... is there nothing you can take?  

I just bought toiletories and some vest tops, I need some shorts but couldnt get any.  Last day at work tom, I'm so excited i can't tell you!  Although won't like the flying but I will cope.  Oh and I bought some books and some sweets for the plane.

I can't believe what bad timing... me and Lily away together.. on the week we find out if we are going to be uncles or aunties!! (joke)

XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

We're now leaving! Katey - you MUST send us texts on Friday!!!!  

Love you both lots, Lily. xx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

well girls off to london today for flight to istanbul tomorrow, will keep yous posted. hope yous are all well. speak soon kim


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

well that;s a departure hatrick! 
Good luck Kim
Have fun Lily
Laura - you have it the wrong way around...boy for me, girl for Lily!!!

Off to work - Katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I'm never wrong KT!!  Well only about half the time!!  

Well I'm packed and ready, bit worried I've just thrown loads of stuff in and not checked any of it matches!!

Are you finding out tom then??  Text me please... my phone should be working and I need to know!

Good Luck Kim
Have lovely time Lily
KY have fun packed week with your dopler!  

Bye!!!! XXXX


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hey ladies

Katey - they may have all deserted you, but I'm still here    And I am dying to know how your scan went!!1

Love
Tracy
x


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Tracy

Well that has brought a tear to my eye! I am not abandoned after all!!

How are you

The scan was a wee bit disappointing but always wonderful - if you catch my drift.

Baby decided that his/her modesty was not to be compromised and so he/she crouched down - bum on ankles, knees bent - into my pelvis and refused to budge. We did get waved at a lot though!! We could not see whether there were boy or girl parts! Dh was gutted and I thought it was hilarious.

We have to have IVIg on Tuesday and so the Dr said he will repeat the scan and hopefully catch him/her out!!!

On a plus note....the killer cells appear to be leaving us alone and the placenta looked good and the baby's femur measured 18 weeks 3 days which was bang on. That is such a relief as i am fraught with worry every day.

Well done on the weight loss. How are you doing it?? 7 pounds makes such a difference. I know - I have struggled with my weight for so long and the drugs/treatment really had a bad effect on my waist line (mind you so did the chocolate and roast potatoes!!). 

Thanks for not leaving me too!!

katey xxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hey Katey

It's got to be a boy!  Only a boy could be that awkward 

So glad that the killer cells are behaving themselves hun and everything is on course! You must be very relieved  
I am a complete novice really on these matters so I have to ask the question, what is IVIg?  With a bit of luck your little bubba will be more accommodating on Tues and you can tell me if my theory is right! 

My weight loss is going ok I think hun. I started on 1 Jan and set myself a goal of losing 2 stones by 1 April! I weighed myself on 13 Jan and had lost 7lb which was really good in 13 days, but am not getting on the scales again until 1 Feb - decided only to get on once a month in case I stay the same some weeks which might demotivate me! Just hope I can do it!!

Sending you lots of hugs and      for Tuesday Katey
Love
Tracy
x


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

How do you manage to be so controlled? When I diet (pretty much all the time as I am horribly overweight) I am on the scales every day. It is not a good thing, I know! I have replaced this madness with doppler over use! Are you following a particular diet or being sensible overall??

IVIg is basically having plasma via a vein to dampen down my killer cels by introducing those of several thousand people. It is a bit minky I think but what is a girl to do There is no evidence that it works but it seems to. It is part of what a the fuss with Mr Taranissi was all about as he is an avid IVIg fan and does a lot of it at his clinic but people are mad because it is not a proven treatment.

I think you are right...it is a boy...I will let you know!

Hugs, Katey xxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Ah, now I understand Katey - I saw the programme - Obviously!  Just didnt put two and two together!  Hey, if a fertility expert says it works, then it must work hun!  You stay positive!!!  Cant wait to hear how you get on tomorrow now so I can see if I am right  

I am not that controlled really hun - it's just I know that if I get on the scales and I have stayed same for ages, or even put on a 1lb or 2 it will really upset me, so best to stay off!  Not following a specific diet, I have cut out completely from my diet potatoes, crisps, chips, chocolate.  I am having fruit for breakfast, a salad or pasta or soup for lunch, and for evening meal a weightwatchers meal bulked out with veg or salad.  If I get hungry I am snacking on ice lollies.  I am also doing 20 - 30 mins every evening on my exercise bike.  Just hoping it works!  Had a blip yesterday and had 2 roast potatoes with my Sunday lunch, plus a bit of chicken skin!   Still, I have to have at least one treat a week or I reckon I will go barmy!   

Good luck with tomorrow hun!

Love
Tracy
x


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

You know I have learnt from my many millions of diets that the occasional treat actually helps to lose weight as the body gets confused and does not register the odd bad thing (that's my theory).

I say enjoy that roastie!!!

I'll let you know tomorrow evening - wish me luck!

katey xxx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hi girls well i am here commenced on 450 gonal f and 150 menogon huge dose but fingers crossed it works. all going well so far except my card has been refused and a ban on it due to the high number of card coping going on but it should be lifeted tomorrow. go back to hospital on thursday will keep you posted
kim


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hey Katey - we found a cafe with the internet at last that's open!! Thank you so much Tracy for keeping our lovely pal company - you're a star   and well done on the weight loss - you obviously know exactly what you need to do and have excellent stamina!

Katey - I'm impatiently waiting for the text to confirm a boy - I agree with you both, it must be  . Not sure if I'll get on here again before Thursday pm as we're day tripping elsewhere and not much is open at this time of year.

Good news Kim on starting the injections, hope you get your card sorted out.

We're having a lovely relaxing time with an apartment on the cliff edge - perfect for listening to the sea lapping against the rocks when we go to sleep and as we wake up. Enjoying some good walks too - have to keep stopping though whilst my heart catches up when we go uphill. No pains though so hope baby is enjoying it.

Best go, time up. Back soon.
Love Lily. xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi - just nipping in to see how you got on Katey?  Is everything ok hun?


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hello hello

Sorry I took so long.

It is indeed a BOY!!!!! And there was no mistaking it as his, err, appendage was standing upright!!! Made us all laugh!

I am so so pleased and excited - it makes it more real somehow.

Kim - good luck and glad that you're injecting

Lily - Thanks for dropping by. I have missed you. Your break sounds blissful.

Tracy - you were right! You must have a 'gift'.

I am tired after the plasma - as usual - so showering and off to bed.

Love to you all

Kateyxxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Fantastic News Katey! So very pleased for you

Love
Tracy
x


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Thanks Tracy - LOVE the illustration!

Katey

ps hope you are doing well today.


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

OK

I am MAD!

Just had a phone conversation with my mum who basically said that she would not visit the baby at our house unless she can smoke and we can only go to hers if we let her smoke in the same room as the baby.

She says that all the passive smoking thing is nonsense and that cigarettes do not cause cancer etc.

I am livid. She said that I am depriving her of her rights and in her home she will do as she pleases. I argued that to place her smoking needs over the basic right to breathe need of a newborn is wrong and she told me to sod off and put the phone down.

What would you guys do

Katey


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Oh Katey, if you want my honest opinion I think your mum is out of order here.  I am a smoker (desperately trying to give up), and I would never, ever smoke in someone's house who didnt smoke, or in front of a baby, or even a child.  

You must stress to your mum the need NOT to smoke anywhere near a newborn child, or any child for that matter!  I realise how upsetting this must be for you sweetheart, to fall out with your parents is awful anyway, but you truly are in the right and I am sure once your mum has had time to think about it she will agree with you    maybe she was just "testing the water" so to speak to see how strongly you felt, and when you were so adamant about it she just got on the defensive?  

You have to stick to your guns Katey, if your mum refuses not to go to the garden to smoke when you are visitng with your little boy then don't take him there!  She will have to come to yours if she wants to see her grandson, that way you will know he is free from passive smoking.

Good luck hun, 
Love
Tracy
xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Tracy

I know it is hard for a smoker - I gave up 2 years ago but got through 30 or so a day until then.

But as much as I believe that smokers have rights - and I do not agree with the new smoking laws in their entirety in that there should be provisions socially for smokers and non-smokers - I also think that non smokers (especialy babies) should be allowed to breathe clean air.

If my son decides to smoke one day that will bother me but until then I have to make the decisions for him (by the way it freaks me out to type 'my son' as I cannot quite believe it yet).

She will not relent. She never does. But you are right I have to stick to my guns.

I am just venting - sorry.

Thank you for listening (or reading)!

Hope you are good today

Katey


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hey Katey, you should never apologise for venting on here hun - that's what we are all here for   

Well done you on giving up after being a heavy smoker!  I am desperately trying to cut down in readiness for our match.  I have vowed that as soon as I get the go ahead from the clinic I am going to go cold turkey   

Love and hugs to you and that little beanie boy

Tracy
xxxx

PS blown ya some lovely bubbles to get you into triple figures hun for luck for little beanie


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi KT and Tracy!  How are you both doing? So pleased you've had company KT. Hope you'll stay around Tracy .

Wonderful news about your scan result KT - how's your son today?   Can you actually feel him yet? About your mum - although I'm not a smoker, I do appreciate people's freedom and if they want to do something they should do it, UNLESS it could potentially harm someone else. Do you know where your mother is getting her info from regarding 'passive smoking is nonsense'? I am rather shocked that your mother is putting herself before the baby, who has no choice in the matter. Would it help if you printed off the following article from the BBC website http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/ask_the_doctor/pregnancypassivesmoking.shtml

IMHO if she continues to take the same stance, then you can only remove your son from her, every time she lights up. Just the possible risk of cot death associated with passive smoking, let alone other things would be enough for me to keep him clear of smoke. Would she let him breathe the fumes of a bus or protect him from them? Have you gotten any further with the matter?

So Katey, now we know you're having a boy - does that mean mine's a girl?? I've got 4 massive weeks to find out!

Off to bed soon - it's been a long drive. Looking forward to hearing from you both and Laura too on Saturday! Everything fine once we got back (bit of a prang in the car), until I stood in a puddle of water in the kitchen which was originating from the fridge/freezer. Opened it up what a stink! Too tired to deal with it, so carried on unpacking and making supper. Then suddenly whilst eating, it dawned on me - the fridge is quite new, however, I do live with the phantom switch turner offerer! Low and behold he had turned off the fridge/freezer at the same time as the radio . But why even the radio - apparently it was shining a standby light that should be turned off - well that makes it worth it then  . He is known to take out all plugs/phone lines etc when it starts raining if it even might be a storm, then I spend the next few hours resorting out why the fax is ringing and not the phone etc. Just before we left I asked why the answer machine had gone off and he'd only switched that off as well (good for business). Anyway the look on his face was enough as he looked so upset when realisation hit that the puddle was his accident! Shame about the frozen duck, steaks, chicken etc etc.... Never mind, I always look at things by saying coud be worse....

Bye for now, lots of love Lily. xx

/links


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hey Lily is back!!!! What happened to the car You mentioned prang.

I am a plug removing fiend also - drives dh mad! But I am fire obsessed. It's never good to remove the fridge one though!!!

How was the holiday?? What did you get up to?

Tracy - good luck with the quitting smoking thing. I know myself that it is a mare! I just stopped one day and never did it again and I think that I was able to do that because my head was in the right place and I knew it was time and, most important, I wanted to do it. Without that it is hard. I know you'll pull it off when the time is right for you. It sounds bad but IVF isn't always enough to make you stop - something has to click in your head. Fingers crossed!

I'm off to shout at the bank manager now...hurrah! Catch you later.

Katey xxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

ps happy 16 weeks today Lily!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Katey. The prang wasn't really serious as DH was parking. We'd driven for over 6 hours (with a few stops) and it was late. Unfortunately he went into a lamp post and crushed the bumper and lights. Could have been worse. It was so sad as DH was so cross with himself but also sooo tired (it was dark and we were very hungry and had just found our apartment), so he felt a bit sorry for himself  . We'd only been there 10mins, however, we soon forgot about it and got on with resting and exploring the area. We walked a lot, always right by the sea - my favourite memories are from Lynton and Hartland - one of the most treacherous coastal areas of Britain. Had lovely picnics and enjoyed the area a lot: definately want to go back. Not many shops open (I teased DH that's why he'd wanted to go to this area  ), but I wasn't in the mood for shopping anyway. Did buy a Devonshire cuddly lamb though  .

Hope you got the Bank Manager sorted  ? Has anything progressed with mother? What does Robin think to it all?

I'm off to see my grandmother tomorrow, who hasn't seen me since the announcement as she's been away abroad. I'm a bit nervous as she doesn't beat around the bush with her words. I'm waiting for her to say blimey with the size of you, you must be having twins.... We'll see.

Tracy - where are you? We'd love you to stay and chat....

Welcome back Laura for tomorrow  .

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Where is everyone?


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Bonjour!!! And what a lovely sunny day it is!! You're all probably out taking in the air - where as we are busy cooking for my parents (again!)

We have also decided that it is time after a year of living here, that we need to get the house sorted. It really does need a lot if work and we've yet to lift a paint brush! So dh is eagerly (not) stripping the walls of the guest room so that we have somewhere to go when or room is transformed. We are not attempting a nursery until the baby is born safe and sound and it is not really necessary as he will be in our room anyway.

Laura - are you back yet?? Did you have fun?? What did you get up to

Lily - poor dh. He must have been so cross with himself. At least all those lovely picnic must have cheered him up. You are brave to eat al fresco at this time of year!!!

Tracy - hope all is well with you!

S'pose I should get back to it.

Catch you later - Katey xxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I'm here Lily!!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Aha! I spoke too soon. Let us know how it goes with your mother KT - you are good to them - do you cook for them EVERY Sunday?

Laura HI! - Your return must be imminent  

We're busy outside today in the lovely sunshine (sorry KT!), preparing some plants as I'm off to hospital tomorrow. Wish it was week 20 scan....

Bye for now. Looking forward to chatting later, once Laura has recovered from any jetlag.
Love Lily. xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi girls

How are you all?  Is Laura back yet then?

I am fine thanks ladies,  have had an awful ear/throat infection but antibiotics starting to kick in now, thank god!!!

Big hugs to you all
Love
Tracy
xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hello!!!

I'm back!! Oh I've missed you lovely ladies!!

I've just read through all your gossip from the last week and forgive me if I've missed anything, I'm rushing as tim will be home in a minute and I am meant to be unpacking!!!

KT - 'my son' oh it gave me goose bumps! Congrats I've just spent the last 24hrs with tims 2 little nephews who are 20months and 4 today.. they are so adorable I could chew there litle checks off!  Boys are so cute!

Oh my dinner is here... I'll be back in half an hour!!

XXXXXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Back!

Where was I....

KT - glad you survived the week without us, glad you had some company.  And as for your mum!! Well!  just can't believe some people!

Lily - Oh sounds nice, I love going on holiday in England, in the summer me and tim went camping for a week around devon/ dorset/ cornwall and it was gorgeous.  Glad you had a lovely time.  Unfortunatley I too must confess to being a phantom switcher offer!  I am obsessed and I drive tim nuts, I too worry about a fire.  I have never turned off the freezer though I must admit!

Tracey - I am joining you as from tomorrow on the healthy eating plan, I don't really need to lose much weight but I need to feel I'm doing everything in my powers for my next IVF.  The holiday is over and the serious business of babymaking begins!

Kim-hope the card gets sorted, where are you up to now?  Keep us posted!!

Ok.. me!

Holiday was fab, did nothing for a few days and then was busy last few days of the holiday.  I went horseriding across the desert and was allowed to gallop as and when I wanted, was amazing, I have never had that much freedom on a horse there are normally some boundaries but with the desert you can just gallop and gallop... still bit achey in the nether regions though   We went to Luxor which is where the valey of the kings and lots of temples are.  Very interesting that the best pharoh ever was a women, they had the best ecomomy and no war for 20 years during her reighn.... and then her step son killed her.  I do wonder why women prime ministers are not mre common, we are much better at public relations.  I got drunk few times   and went to the marina which was nice.  Didn't really have any nice food though, not good veggie options.

Then got home early yest mornign and had to go to Notts for Tims nephews 4th Birthday, we went to a pizza place where the kids get to make there own pizza's was really fun.  Maybe oneday we will all meet up there with our little ones?  I hope so.

Lots of stuff going on with Tim's sister which was a bit stressful and I had  row with one of Tims aunts as she actually said that she felt homosexuals should be sent to prison and where evil??  I so live in a bubble of nice people who are all nice to people!!  

Anywy I hve to go and sort the washing and get ready for work.... groan!!

Have acupunture tom, hoping she will tell me I am nicce and rested.

Nice to be back.... although not nice to be going to work tomorrow!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Yeah LOVELY LAURA is back!!!!         

Your horse riding sounds wonderful and I also look forward to us meeting up with our children at the pizza house. You sound well rested and ready for the babymaking - bring it on, I am soooo excited for you: I am not sure how I am going to cope whilst you go through each step - you must promise to keep us informed of every detail asap, else I'll go crazy  !

Hi Katey, hope lunch went ok? Have you managed to control yourself with that doppler yet? I've been thinking of getting one again today as I'm getting overly anxious as to whether everything is alright. I'm hoping they'll listen tomorrow at the clinic.... How's Robin getting on with the stripping  ?

Hi Tracy - sorry to hear about the infection. Glad you came back to chat.

Lots of love, Lily. xx
Have had a really tedious evening going through all the drawers in the kitchen cupboard near the fridge freezer that got affected by the water: decided better chuck lots of stuff out rather than ignorantly just putting it all back together. Got rid of loads of amazing junk!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls....where are you all??

Robin stripping I must have missed that bit??  Tell me more!

Lily - I know i was thinking today I must order my drugs tom, getting close now and I'm feeling scared.  After next Af I start on the pill and then on day 19 I should start stimms.  I'm sure you ladies wilhold my hand through it,and of course I will be sharing every sordid detail with you.  For me it really feels this is it.  If this cycle goes as bad as my last one then thats it forme forever.

Anyway first day back to work went ok.  Back in the swing of things now. 

KT - where are you??

XXXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Where are you all?? 

I'm off to get into bed with a cup of tea as I'm SOOOO cold,we have rubbish windows and the gas ran out this am so the heating has been off all day and its like an ice bucket here!! 

So I'm off to curl up and watch ER and have an early night as exhausted from first day back to work.

Night girls XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura, What's happened to that Katey! Hope you're ok Katey  

Sorry to hear about the heating: where's Tim? You need some skin to skin contact to really warm you up  ! Glad work went ok. What's this about this could be your last go? I thought you were thinking of taking Tim's supersperm to Bourn Hall. You really need to give at least one other clinic ago, especially if it could be free! When I went to Bourn Hall, I thought it was great and a really professional, but friendly place that's dedicated to babymaking. However, we may not need it - I think your holiday has done wonders for your soul and got you rightly ready for this go .... bring it on and keep     .

Went to hospital today. Dr couldn't hear hearbeat  , so brought in a scanner and saw it on screen - thank goodness. Unfortunately, it was an old machine, so I couldn't see clearly enough whether the sex was visible. My nan rang tonight and all she wanted to know was whether I've found out the sex yet! I think she wants to know what colour wool to buy. Had a hectic afternoon in the freezing outside, busy with orders - shouldn't complain as it's all necessary for the winter bank balance....

Are you getting gas on tomorrow?

Now off to order broadband before BT cuts our ISDN off.
Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

HI girls!

Sorry I have been cr** today. I was with Ofsted from 10 until 5 and then had to deal with stuff at work and then eat......... you know how it is.

Ofsted was great. I now have an after school club and school holiday clubs to contend with!!! Hurrah!!

It's part of my plan.

Anyway...

Laura - Lily is right. I took 3 goes before we got lucky. Bourn Hall is a great place. I had et there once (long story). BUT as Lily says, this conversation may be needless seeing as this might very well be the one!!! I am so so so excited for you and you can rest assured that we want to be a part of it as long as that makes you happy. I am getting butterflies!!! Glad the holiday went well. It sounds a nice mix of fun and interest!! Did you get a great tan??

Lily - Sometimes with the doppler it takes a while to get a beat and I am nearly crazy until we hear it. Must have been nice to see little one again though!!! Do you want to find out the sex Telling us? You better!!! I wish I had a knitting nan....either of you 2 knit?

Well I have to sleep as I have a glucose intolerance test at the hospital tomorrow at 8 am. Joy. Praying the results are good.

Just a quick laugh....I was desperate to tend my undercarriage this evening as it is getting overgrown....I cannot see it at all i am so fat now and even when I try to lift the gut it's no use!!! you should have seen me squirming in the shower to get a glimpse!!! Oh the joys! 

Night - katey xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Oh - oops over tired - Hi Tracy!!! I noticed 3 lbs has come off the total and I was most impressed!!!!! Well done you! the pic is nice too - good to put a face to a name!

Katey xxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Morning girls!!

*Laura* - oh wow I was soooooo jealous when I read your post - riding horseback through the desert! Sounds so fabulous! I love riding - I am not much good at it, I have never galloped, just got as far as a gentle canter  (only started lessons a little while ago), but there is something about riding that I love. Even just trotting around the fields is one of the best feelings ever, something about it just makes me feel happy 

*Lily* - that must have been a bit scary for you hun, but at least you got to see your little beanie on screen and know all is well 

*Katey* -  @ you trying to tidy up your lady garden!    Get your DH to do it for you 

That photo on avator was taken in July last year - I have since had my hair coloured red   

Message for all 3 of you

Now girls, about the name of this thread! Disillusioned?? Surely we should be changing the name now!   Think of a good name for your thread and I will change it for you if you want? What about "The 3 Muskateers", or "The 3 Degrees"  

Love
Tracy
x


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I must say that I like the muskateers but we have Kim and you, Tracy, so that makes us 5!

So I say '5 Muskateers' or 'Muskateers'.

Katey

ps good morning everyone!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
I like 'Muskateers'.

Hope you're feeling more rested this morning Katey - we've missed you! By the way - you're not fat - you're pregnant!

Hi Tracy, well done on the weight loss - woohoo. I have a request - can't you crop your photo left and rightl to make it portrait, then it will show as a bigger photo! Tell me to mind my own business if you like, but I'm trying to squint and say hi right now!

Hi Laura. How are you feeling? I hope you're still feeling the effects of the holiday. Did your acupuncturist think you were more chilled out?

Must go, plants are calling....

Love Lily. xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Forgot about me and Kim    Sorry Kim!!  That's cos when the thread first started there was just the 3 of you!!!  

OK, will wait to see what Laura and Kim think before I change the name, otherwise they might not be able to find us  

Love and hugs
Tracy
xxx

PS - Lily, is that big enough for you?  Dont want my face any bigger   might frighten new members off!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Nice one Tracy! The photo of you two is lovely - where DID you find him     Would love to see your red hair! I coloured mine the same a few years ago, and boy did I regret it!

Hi Katey, Laura and Kim. xxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,

Well I've had a hectic day at work and am feeling shattered, had all good intentions of going to the gym tonight but so can't be bothered.  Tim has a friend over tomorrow so I'll go then and he can have his manly chats without me in the way.

As for the acupuncture I think she thought things were good, normally when she takes my pulse readings she says things like 'oh your spline' and 'hmmm' but yesterday she kept saying 'oh good'... so thats sounds promising a!!  This was the first time I have been and not had a cold/ cough/ cystisis etc.  I dunno if it helps, to be honest I think if it just relaxes you maybe I should go for a nice meal with the money instead!!

Lily - I did not know you went to Bourn Hall?  Was that just for an info session?  This was your firrst IVF wasn't it?

As for trying again, it wil depend on when that results are, if I don't produce any eggs again then I think I will have to accept that I am not going to be a mummy in that way.  I am warming to adoption, Tim shares an office with a childrens social work team and he said one of the social workers brought in 2 little girls who were crying and wanting there mum, I just thought, yes I could have them and give them a big cuddle.  I don't know.  I need to just try to get through this IVF as best I can. I have taken 2 1/2 weks off work so hopefully can concentrate on healthy and relaxing living.

KT - Oh i've missed you!  You and your undercarriage!!!   make me laugh, as Lily said I'm sure Robin ould help out!  

Tracey - Horse riding is onderful, hen i as a teenager one of the girls I went to school with had lots of horses and I used to clean them in exchange to ride them, I've never had a lesson but I'm ok as a rider.  I don't ever ride now as I don't have the time to on one but at the same time hate rding schools as the horses are alays a bit 'dead mouthed' and far too obediant!!  Oh I could talk about it forever.  I love it, the freedom.  A big muscle pounding between your legs??!! 

Kim - Where are you??

XXXX


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

laurab said:


> A big muscle pounding between your legs??


 oooohh errrrrr Mrs   

What did you think for a new name for the thread *Laura*? Any ideas?

*Lily* - will try and find a recent one with the red hair hun - I love it red, so I always go red in winter, then back to blond for summer! My hair is naturally blond, well, it used to be, but now it's natural with a little help from a highlighter    Trouble with having it red is, cos my roots grow through blond, they look grey against the red!!!

*Kim* - are you back from Istanbul yet or you still there? Thinking of you and hoping the 2ww is going well    

Love to you all
Tracy
xx

PS - Did you get your lady garden sorted Katey?


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Sorry tracey i forgot - yeah i like muskateers although i think we should wait to change it until Kim returns as she will wonder where we have gone!!

Why would anyone want to dye there hair red I have red hair (natural) and hate it!  I used to dye mine black as a youngster, looked like that one from the adams family!  Thig with red hair is that you can't really dye it other colours its really just looks rubbish if you try (and believe me i have!!).

I've been tesco's and bought a cake for a lady at works birthday, she is 60and I've got 60 candles   !!
Bought a new book for the train, 'boy in stripped Pjs' about the holoculst.

Oh I read a really good book on holiday called 'snow flower and the secret fan' its about a chinese lady who has to go through foot binding.  It really is a fantasic book, I cried twice!!  someone must read it so I can talk to you about it.  I got it in tesco!

Anyway I have to hang out the washing, have a bath, get stuff ready for work tom and trim the rabbits hair (thats actually the rabbits not a funny term for my undercarriage  )

Love to you all.... where is Kim? we need an update!!


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

ooooh Tracy - he looks like Matt Dillon! Lucky old you!!!!!!! Mind you, you look fantastic also so he is lucky man!

My undercarriage is a work in progress. I managed to feel my way and trim the, err, bridge but the edges and under proper have been abandoned. I will get a lady who does onto it straight away! I am not letting dh near there as the other day I had to have a quick look as I saw bleeding and did not know where it was coming from (long story but all ok). Anyway I have never really seen 'it' (or anyone elses for that matter) so close up and I really hated it. So now I am never letting dh near there again (in the light) and I am ashamed that so many Dr's and embryologists have had to experience it.

Laura you are a one! Pounding muscle indeed!
I have never really experienced acupuncture but loads of women say it's what made the difference for them. Can't do any harm. 
I want to adopt also...whatever. I am happy beyond belief to be pregnant but I will adopt a sibling group also. i got approved to apply but dh said he wanted to try IVF again so we did and I am glad I listened. However I am definite about adopting.

Lily - How you doing this evening Get the plants sorted? You are an inspiration. I can barely stay awake to make a cup of tea!!!

I got up early this am to have the glucose test. I was nil by mouth and desperate for a cup of tea. Then on the way out I noticed that my appointment is March 6th, not today! What a wally I am!!! Dh was none to chuffed!! But I got my tea!!

Off for a shower now...hugs...Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

OMG......

KT you are half way through!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies!
What a day! I had such a bad night last night with headache, eye ache and feeling rubbish, I just cried - think I did too much yesterday, so will be taking it steadier from now on. Had a bad night (up 3 times) and my eyes were all puffy this morning  .

Back to my pals  .
Laura, I would say keep with the acupuncture. IMHO it relaxes a person, that not many other ways can. If you're more relaxed, the 'better for egg production' hormones will be. I noticed your keyboard letters have returned - did Tim get the new pc - or shouldn't I ask  . Yes, I did go to Bourn Hall, when I wanted a second opinion and also considering egg share. When we finally went for IVF, it was a choice between them and Care Notts and Care Notts won for a few reasons (eg satellite unit close by), but I certainly would have been happy to go to Bourn Hall. As for your red hair - now I'm thinking maid marion/pre-raphaelite locks?? Maybe you could just take a few strands for us, as I'm very intrigued! I love red hair - mines an awful mousey colour - one hairdresser was very kind once and described it once as strawberry blonde - bless her!

HI KT - I was only thinking this am - I must ask KT when she gets the results of her GTT. When's your next visit to London? I have a midwife appointment tomorrow - hopefully she'll get her doppler out  .

Hi Tracy - can't wait for the red piccy.

Hi Kim - hope everything is going ok...

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls

oh lily, poor you.  I insist you start acting like a pregnant lady and stop pulling up trees with your bare hands!!!  Are you feeling better today?

Just a quickie, I'm still at work... groan... and now off to get my gym stuff and go to the gym as Tim has a friend over who has just split up with his long standing partner so I'm not sure how long he will stay and if I'll be able to get on the comp at home.

Oh and no he hasn't got the new comp yet... he's still looking!!

XXXXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi girls

Lily I agree with Laura - trees and bare hands are no work for a pregnant lady. Take a load off! The baby is telling you to chill - when he/she comes there will be no chill time so take advantage now. Apart from that how's you?

Laura - gym bunny! Do a few minutes on the treadmill for me! I am like a balloon. You will be super fit for this IVF and I think that it is the best thing you can do - worked for me (although I still had a long way to go). 

Hi Tracy and Kim!!

I went to the dentist today and shame of shames he said he would leave me alone until after the baby because of the heparin and pregnancy. Was I gutted NO! I am such a denist baby!! I squirm like a wriggly thing and ooh and ah at the slightest touch. I was so glad to get out of there.

I am a football widow this evening. Dh is watching England on our new spangly tv and I have been relegated (you see, football speak) to the tiny portable in the boudoir which means I will miss everything and be asleep in 5 seconds flat. Great!

Off to doppler

Katey xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

well I didnt go to the gym, had a very long day at work didn't get home until 9 and was relieved to find tims friend had already gone and Tim had cooked him dinner but he had already eaten... so I walked in to a big plate of veggie spag bol! Mmmmm!  I will finish work tom at 5 as I have a home visit at 4 and won't o back to the office after... so I WILL go to the gym tom.  

KT -I am a footy widow too!  New spangly tv?  Nice!  Oh and talkng of dentist babies... I am the girl who hasnt been for 11 years!!!  I know i'm really naughty!!

Kim?  Tracey?  Any news/ gossip?

XXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Woke up feeling better, thanks. Snow means working inside, so at least I'm warm and able to catch up on paperwork.

Hope you get to the gym tonight Laura. Well done for being so keen. For the few weeks prior to our IVF, we walked each weekend approx. 7-10 miles. It was so lovely to be in the fresh air and active and also made me drink lots of water. The day before ET, was a Sunday, so we went to our usual woods/river and did 4 miles, not so much, but EC had been 2 days prior. It felt really good and I believe helped me as it must have improved my circulation, endorphins and relaxation. So, I'm looking forward to hearing your Gym news....

Hope you had a nice nap Katey, whilst footie was on. We watched relocation, that had a 5 mth pregnant woman on, and all I could think was, I'm bigger than her already!

Hi Tracy and Kim - where are you Kim?

Lots of love, Lily. Redbush time.


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily

I watched relocation too (how much money!!!!!) and I thought exactly the same thing.

BUT worry not....I met a girl yesterday who is 20 weeks and she was vast also so I think we are ok.

Laura - have a great time at the gym if you do manage to get out of work on time. I hope so.

Katey


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well I don't think I will be able to go to the gym, we have thick snow and my gym is out in the sticks so the roads will be slippy.  I'm destined never to get there!!  I finshed work bang on 5, didn't hav my home visit didn't make it to work as she was snowed in (she only lives 15mins from work??).  

Tim has gone out on his bike in the snow??!!  But I'm home nice and early.  I've got a headache and a sore throat?? Am i ever destined to be well??

Meant to be out with ork folks tom but think I will just come home. XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Laura - I think you need another holiday!

katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well hopefully I will be heading off to barcelona first week in March with tim!  Aren't I a lucky girl!!



Oh crimewatch on now!!  I love it!! XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Oh No! Crimewatch leaves me with nightmares - it's soooo depressing. Sorry about not going to the gym. So glad you've another holiday Laura - keep   and pampering yourself as much as possible!

Off to be now as I can feel headache returning.... Hope you're all well.

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Night girls!


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Evening!
How's the headache and sore throat Laura? Hope you're feeling better? Any sign of activity, or maybe you're gonna rest for the evening. Not much on tv - well for me anyway  .

Hi Katey, how's the day? I've been wondering should I be cutting mine then? I just never have  . Do you think it should all come off for the birth  ?

Must go and cook DH some dinner: he loves his grub even MORE when it's chilly and we've been working outside today so some warm grub will do us good. Interesting fact: the sheep on the snowy moors of Exmoor have extra large tummies, so they can fill up on poor quality vegetation that their bodies have to work hard at digesting and thereby their insides acts as a furnace... On that note, I'm off to eat as I'm feeling the need for a glowing internal fire.  

Lots of love Lily. xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi girls, how are you all today? I am bloomin freezing  We have only had light snowfall and now its all gone, but it is sooooooooo cold!!!

Lily -  @ your glowing internal fire  what you cooking then? Anything nice? I have a nice low fat recipe chicken casserole cooking at the moment.

Laura  - hope you're feeling a bit better now hunnie - sore throats are so irritating and painful 

Katey  - aw hun I know exactly how you feel about the dentist! Last time I had to go for a filling my mum had to come with me - she held my hand while they gave me the injection, but as it started working I had a massive panic fit and ended up walking out of the room leaving my mum sat there!! Oh she gave me such a bollocking (I may be 35 yrs old but a bollocking from my mum is still as bad as when I was 5  ) I then spent the whole afternoon with a totally numb left side of my face for no reason whatsoever 

Kim  - thinking of you hunnie, hope all is going ok in Istanbul and looking forward to your news when you get back sweetie  

No more news from me really, still working like a trojan! Managed to get Monday and Wednesday off work next week though!! Cant wait till Monday morning when DPs alarm goes off and I know I can just snuggle back down 

Love and hugs
Tracy
xxxx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi there

Sorry I did not post last night. Had a row with dh - he was being an insensitive male - and felt so angry I could not bring myself to type.

Anyway...

Tracy I cannot believe you bolted from the dentist like that!!! How very funny. Did you ever go back I never did that...but I did smack the dental nurse once when I was hurt. She was not impressed. I had no idea what I was doing!

Lily - where did you find out about those sheep Do you have a little known facts book?? Makes a lot of sense though...isn't science amazing! How you feeling now you are at 17 weeks??!!! Your weeks seem to be flying but mine are dragging like hell. Do you have scan etc soon?? Did you read about the dangers of 4d scans?? What do you think??

Laura - Barcelona!!! You are a regular little explorer!!! Have you been there before It will be lovely. Did you get to the gym yet How is Tim behaving Any news on the computer purchase

Hope you're doing ok kim.

Well...off for a nap. dh is in London and I have 3 hours before church so I think I should make the most of them by sleeping!!!! I have a busy week coming up. 20 week scan (a little late) on Wednesday and maybe my last IVIg (yeah!!!) on Thursday. In between those I am redecorating the house (or at least orchestrating it!!!) and whipping nursery into shape.

Catch up later...Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls,

Sorry didn't post last niht was out with work having a few glasses of red wine!!  Was a nice evening tim came up to join me which was nice.  

We have been lazy today just resting in bed with our hangovers  .  We are off to my mums tonight for a chinese,we were meant to g xmas week but kept putting it off.  So we are going tonight.  

I haven't got to the gym yet but have a free day tom and I'm off work tue soI can go in the day then too. I lovegoing to the gym when its quiet and I am not knackered.  

I have course work to be in by the 26th FEb (just a draft) but I haven't even picked up the stuff since my first lecture last sept and I've missed all the workshops!!  Ops!  So I plan to do some tidying and then a hour or so study this afternoon and then all day tom and tues.  

My drugs were meant to turn up today and they haven't?? Maybe the delivery will be up until 5pm? I just assumed it would be in the morning?  what happens if it doesn't turn up?  Will they send another batch out?

Its valentines wednesday... you ladies doing anything?

KT - do you want to talk about the row?  Are things ok now? Yes I've been barcelona before it has to be the most beautiful city in the world.  Tim has never been and we can go for a couple of nights and it won't cost much.  And I have a friend out there who I may be able to meet up with for a drink too. XXX

Lily - Do you never trim?  I doubt it really matters for the birth?  I don't know best wait for a response from KT,sure she has the answer!

Kim - We are awaiting some news

Tracey - he he!! you and the dentist!!!  Still your braver than me, I don't even get as far as gettin in the room!  Daft really, all what we go through and we are scared of the dentist!

Anyway I best get to my jobs. XXXX


Lily -


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Did you manage to sort things out KT before DH went to London, hope so?   I find now that when things go wrong - or should I say when DH is in the wrong! it hurts even more than ever, as I want so much for everything to be lovely. Sorry for asking the trim question - was a bit personal.   They'll just have to take me as they find me....  What's all this about 4D dangers though - please tell me more? Are you going to have it done anyway? Good news about the IVIg - fingers crossed it's the last.

Laura - Hope the evening with your mum goes ok. Are you going to wear the sweater she got you for Christmas?   Good idea to go to the gym when you've more time as it is so much more relaxing. Hope you get some study done as we don't want a last minute stressed Laura, just as you're doing the most important stages of this cycle.   Did the drugs arrived this afternoon?

Hi Tracy - dinner last night was fish - not overly warming, but tonight DH is making a balti - yum! Smells wonderful from here and should be extra warming.

By the way Katey, I picked up the info re the sheep whilst in Devon. I'm terrible for reading local leaflets and remembering things like that, rather than where we've been....

Hi Kim.

Must go, DH is calling. Intend to have a rest this evening as have been busy all day tidying and cleaning and sorting out .... Oh dear Dh is calling again. He hates being kept waiting!  


Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi there

No the drugs didn't arrive...    I will call them first thing monday morning, they better send me another load staright away??  Where can they be?  They even called yest to confirm the delivery.

Mmmmm Balti! Sounds lovely.

We are going to have a chinese, the one near my mum has a big veggie menu all that mock meat stuff.  I'm pfob gonna have rice noodle and spicy lamb... mmmm!

Anyway just got out the bath so better go put that lovely jumper on!!  I'll be a much happier laura when this evening is over.  

Have a good evening girls. XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Lily - don't be daft! I am not phased by any kind of question really, least of all a trimming one....I just forgot to add my response (sorry). I am all about keeping it neat. I hate waxing - although I believe it is the best way - so I bought a peach (my name for 'it') lady shave and it's great because it has a trimmer and a shaver attachment. It also has an epilator but I have not been brave enough for that yet. The only problem is I now cannot see my peach let alone trim it so I am going to have to get some professional help soon! Especially as the baby is due in the summer. Plus - and this is gross and I apologise - when you're pregnant (lily you'll know this and Laura, Kim, Tracy you will find this out very very soon) things can get messy and it's best not to have anywhere for it to settle!!! Apologies for that again.

Well I have had my suspicions a couple of times recently but am more convinced tonight....I think I felt him moving! How bizarre it is! I'm sure when he is belting my ribs I will not be so pleased but, for now, it is reassuring!

Laura + Lily - there's not much to say on the row really. Dh has this irritating habit of criticising the way I look. he does not mean to be nasty but just says things that he believes are factual and should not bother me. Last night he said that before I was pregnant my stomach was droopy. Another day he said that I may not feel baby yet because I had extra padding....and so on. Anyway I flipped and he was mortified when I reeled all the comments back to him. I was so hurt and felt terribly ugly. Still do a bit - it will take a while for him to turn this around. If only he wasn't so great i'd ditch him!!!

So Laura...how was the chinese and what's happened to the drugs oooh the time is nearly upon you again!! I am so excited for you. In answer to your ? about Valentines....no not doing a thing! I object to the inflated prices on V Day so we do something later. I am having a scan though so that will make my day. What are you and Master Tim up to then?

lily - dinner sounds nice! I made a sausage and bean hotpot which I thoroughly enjoyed!!!! Are you off on a walk tomorrow??


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi KT - Yes we are off for a walk! DH's idea so I got some picnic food today... I lurve being in the fresh air and especially love the drive back when I'm usually pooped and fall asleep! Oooh your Robin!  I think he needs reminding that with issues such as hormone fluctuations, combined with an obvious 'not totally easy to accept' change of body image needs a bit more sensitivity. I've already been asked if I'm sure it's not twins, but know that slimming down and intensive exercise is not going to happen until after the baby's born. I don't think it's an easy time, especially for people like me who has always had a tendency to be on the plumper side to suddenly balloon, albeit for the best reasons in the world. Maybe it will be easier when it's obvious it's a baby effect rather than just looking like too many puddings. Anymore from Robin and send him round...   By the way I now know what you mean by the bowling ball effect...

How was the meal Laura? It's very strange they confirmed delivery yesterday for today. I bet it arrives Monday, but I agree on ringing them to check. Any special dessert for afters?

Goodnight my lovelies     Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi girls,


meal was ok, was just a tke away and then soe of my dads fruits from his allotment for pudding. .. yum, we survivied and we are free of another visit for a while ... Yeah!!

I've been trying to do my coursework today but the kitty thinks its great fun to grab my pen the whole time!!!  But got a bit done, then i'm meeting tim at the gym at 12.30, he went at 9.30am and is oing to do 4 hours on the bike   so I will just meet him and o my little hour at the gym then we will go for a swim/ steam etc together.

As for my drugs, if they deliver them tom there will be noone here!! and I paid extra for a sat delivery!!!    Not a happy bunny.  But yes I start the pill after my next AF which is at the weekend sometime. then on day 18 will have a scan and start stimms after that, so not long.  Tim came home with some stuff about fostering and adoption from the net the other night, which make me feel a little less pressured during this cycle.  We are looking at alternantives so if this doesn't work we have a plan (of course it is't the same and I will be devasted, but I guess we just will have to deal with it).

Lily - Picnic??  Oh lovely, although I not really a lover of the cold, I think I'l wait for the spring for my picnic!!

KT- Your beautiful.  I promise you, tim called my boobs two fried eggs the other day and couldn't understand why I go upset... he even said 'but i love fried eggs!!!' romantic a!!  We are off to my favourite Thai in London on Wed, I have acu wed as they were fully booked n my normal monday slot (maybe all the romantics were on wed slot and changed to the monday??).  Tim loves to do things on valentines, I agree about it all being ver priced though, although this restaurant won't be.  One year tim fly me to venice for the day    It was extremely romantic!!  But very pricey!!.

As for the trimming, I use an ordinary razor to shave my undercarriage and them just trim up my triangle, I'm not very hairy to be honest though.  I don't think I could wax!  

Anyway I better get back to my work! 

Have a nice sunday. XXX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

That is soooooo romantic. To be flown to Venice for a spot of lunch. How very civilised! He gets extra brownie points for that!

i would definitely get my money back for the Saturday delivery. That is just no good at all. Cheek!

I have not had a triangle down there ever. More like a large rectangle! You are so lucky!!! It must be my Irish blood...they were hairy due to the cold - they should have just evolved like those sheep Lily mentioned then I would be less hairy and thinner!

Lily...how was the picnic You do like to eat in the cold!!!!! well I bet it brought some colour to your cheeks. It will take you no time at all to lose the baby weight with all this walking! If only i were so active. Alas, not!

Off to eat....Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura - how was the gym, swim and sauna   ? I agree, Tim definately gets extra points for the Venice trip - I love it there.... About this trimming - if I had the nerve I'd do a poll on it - I didn't realise you were into it as well! Am I the only one who never has - blimey!? I always thought it came back prickly - couldn't bear THAT  !

Katey, it suddenly dawned on me this afternoon - you said you'd felt movement - WOWEE! That's fantastic. Have you felt anymore  ?

Had a lovely picnic. DH and I are a bit outdoorsey as you may have guessed by now and love exploring new places, rain or shine, cold or hot, even if they're not far away. We went to an RSPB reserve which was a bit muddy, and despite having good walking boots on, I slipped over twice  and straight away said, "Oh no, baby". Nothing serious though - just got filthy. Enjoyed the sleep on the way back until DH turned up the radio extra loud as one of his favourite songs came on  .

Off now to download our Devon photos for Truprint to print out....

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls

Lily - I love the outdoors too if I'm wrapped up warm!!  I went swimming in the outdoor pool at the gym yest??  I love going to safari parks etc.  Whipesnade have just just advertised that they have a litter of white tigers and a baby elephant... hoping tim wil take me when we off in March!!  

KT - Where are you?  Bet your playing with your doppler...or maybe poking that baby of yours to make it move!!  

Well the drug saga continues, aparently royal mail didn't deliver sat because of the snow!!!  There was none by sat!! so they delivered it today when I was at work!  So I have to pick it up tomorrow from the sorting office.  The chemist said it doesn't have to be refridgerated?  Is that right?  He said if I'm not happy he will send another lot out tomorrow to me.  So I'll keep you updated.

Kim-  we haven't heard from you in ages?? I hope all is well and you just can't get to the comp.  

Tracey - Hiya!!  How are you doing?  How is the weight loss going?  I am now my target weight so just in time for my treatment which I'm chuffed about.  Are you any nearer to finding a match?

XXXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Everyone has deserted me!!  I have no friends! 

I hope you are all back tomorrow. XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

I have not deserted you....I was mad busy all day and tonight dh got home after 3 days away and we watched that new Twin Towers movie with Nicholas cage which was so so so sad. Why do I put myself through it

So you are at your target weight!! That is fanbloodytastic! I wish I was before we did the treatment as it would have made a real difference. I am so large now that I have gone up 2 dress sizes! Oh well....poop happens.

How's work

that drug snow story was rubbish! What a pathetic excuse. Good job you did not need it that day!! 

Hope everyone else is peachy

off to doppler

hugs - Katey xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Well i have my drugs... boy there is alot of them!!

I am feling sick and terrified.  I don't want to do it again its so bloody hard.  

Everything is at its optimum, I am the right weight,doing acu, eating well, not drinking too much, down to one cup of proper tea again, not too stressed with work, what else can I do?

Any idea where I can buy some orange knickers?  Can't seem to get any anywhere.

I'm off work today as a study day.  Need to get my coursework done and get to the gym and may try to get to the shops too as my friends birthday at the weekend and I need to get her a pressie.  I'm off to see her at the weekend in Devon.  

What are you two ladies up to today?


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi ladies,
Glad the drugs arrived Laura - the most important to keep refrigerated is the trigger injection (the last one, to ripen the eggs) : was it in a coolbag style carton? Now try and chill yourself too! You said yourself everything is absolutely perfect - your weight, diet, acupuncture, less stress at work etc and you've just had a holiday, so pat yourself on your back and keep   . Why don't you get some orange clothes dye and dye some white knickers? Also, a good idea is to get an orange flowered indoor mini rose or begonia and watch and smell it everyday as I believe a living orange plant is really good during the cycle, especially as you water it and you see you're keeping it alive .... Where are you going in Devon? Wish I was going with you....  

Hi Katey - glad Robin's back. Much warmer in bed at night eh! I could do with your doppler as I've had a dodgey tummy and now worried. Back to hospital in 6 days though, so I'll ask them to check it then. Any more movements?

Busy at work today. Just came in for coffee and popped on to see you. Please may the sunshine continue as it makes work so much better ....

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily

Hmmmm... tummy pain.  I'm sure its nothing to worry over just things stretching etc prob.  You have the runs or owt?  Or eaten anything unusal?  Hope you feel better soon. XX

I am going to have some lunch and then head to the shops to get some dye and kickers and a plant... tim will think I've gone loopy!!  I then am going to the gym and then am cooking a veg stew with dumplings for tims dinner!  So much for a study day a!!

I am going to Plymouth with work on Fri and then carrying on to Paignton after to see my frined, she moved just before xmas into a beautiful cottage in the middle of a big field... lucky moo!  she used to live opposite me and is my oldest mate, I miss her lots so looking forward to seeing her.

I just want to prewarn you both.... I am going to drive you nuts and be so needy you'll be unplugging your comps over the next few weeks!!  So I apologise now!!

Sunshine aways makes things nicer. 

XXX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

P.s. I never ysed the pregnyl last time as I didn't get to EC so that is safe in the fridge already.  Also maybe more a ? for KT as your cycle was NHS i think Lily.  Do I have to buy my own needles etc?  If so how do I know what to buy are where do I get them from?

XX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Well Laura - did you get the knickers, dye and plant? Hope Tim finds orange sexy! About the needles - you could be cheeky and pop into the clinic and speak to a nurse and maybe they'll give you some. Worth a try.

Don't worry about driving us nuts - I'm sooooooo excited about your baby making cycle. Bring it on and let us know EVERYTHING    . Hope you've got some orange sweet potato or butternut squash in your stew? I went nutty and ate, drank and smelled orange the whole time. It was over October so we consumed loads of pumpkin....

Hi Katey - how's everything - any more movements?

Have a headache this avo. Went to town before lunch and was late back from shopping. Didn't get lunch until 14:30 - not sensible. Think I'll have a sleep now....

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

I didn't get any knickers or a plant.    I buy myself some orangey lip gloss though and I have sweet pots on the stew.  

I bought some lovely pjs too they are like a very thin matierial and in green with sort of chinesey flowers on it.  Its lovely, shouldn't really have wasted the money but hay!!  Bought myself a new top too and my friend some birthday pressies.

I got some eyelash dye too as mine are blonde.  

Lily - enjoy your sleep. XXX

KT, Kim, Tracey - hello!!


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi girls, how are you all?

Laura - Ooooh new PJ's! I love PJ's. I would live in my PJ's if I could  I have blond eyelashes too hunni it's a real pain isn't it? I also pick mine out when I am tired so I end up with big gaps  makes putting mascara on them almost impossible! Great that you have your drugs hun and you are ready to go!     

Lily - hope you had a nice nap hun and the headache has gone now 

Katey - how are you hun? I havent watched that twin towers movie - too frightened of all the   I know I would do!! The slightest little thing sets me off at the mo, so I reckon that would finish me off 

Kim - thinking about you in Instanbul still sweety, hope everything is ok with you

No news from me girls. Had an "Away Day" at work today, kind of a teambuilding sort of thing. We played ten pin bowling afterwards - my team came second so we got a bottle of champagne. Noone else wanted it so I thought, waste not want not!! Brought it home and have hidden it so we can have it for tomorrow night!

You all got nice plans for tomorrow? DP is just cooking me a meal which I am looking forward to! Makes a change from me doing it all the time  We are in the middle of decorating the kitchen so I have just been busy with that, as well as work and stuff!

Love and hugs
Tracy
xxx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi all,

I'm going to have an early night.  Feel reay tired and got an early start tom, then acu after work and then going to my fav Thai for dinner.

Tracey- I hate my eyelashes, I've dyed then brown!  I pick at my eyebrows when I'm stressed?!  Still saves plucking!  We have team away days at work.  But we never have booze prizes!!although we do normally get drunk after!

Lily - You feeling better hon?  Have you shaved your bush yet!!!??  

KT - am missing your news!  Any more movement?

Kim -We NEED an update!!

My stew was lovely I put lentils in it and it was really nice. Mmmmm.  Tim been a meanie tonight.  He went to the gym then went on the comp and now on his game.  He said I'm being demandng!  Think cos I haven't spoken to anyone all day!

Anyway enjoy the rest of your eves and have a nice vaentines, chat more tom.

Night Night XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi there

What a horrid day! We have the plasterers in and they have covered my house in dust and cr** and now dh and I are coughing for England. But I did persuade him to take me out for a s skim decaf latte from m&s which was bliss. Although whilst I was there i got realy wound up watching this mil grab her new(ish) born grandson after his feed and jigge him up and down - for which there was no reason as he was as content as could be - so he was full of wind and sicking up his lunch courtesy of his annoying g mother! Plus his mum stood by helpless, muslin square in hand, desperate to get her baby back!

Oooh it did make my blood boil! (i'm hormonal - sue me!).

Laura - All of my injections had needles attached or syringes with needles attached. I was given extra for drawing up the mixing fluid. I would ask your clinic for supplies and a sharps bin - which will be invaluable...although mine is overflowing and I have no idea what to do with it as my clinic refuse to take it back as it costs them money to dispose of.

I love pj's - absolutely THE best invention ever so I say money well spent!

Lily - how's your headache and what's this fascination with orange? Funny, since I have been pg I have gone mad for oranges and OJ...maybe it is post, as well as pre, pg important??!! You are nearly 18 weeks now!! That is fab!!!

Tracy - aaah...so you have a romantic evening planned....that is lovely. My dh is as romantic as a wet kipper. (sorry robin). We too are in the throes of a new kitchen and it is driving me nuts!!! How are you coping??!

Off to help change our sheets - as he is huffing and puffing next door!

Wish me luck for tomorrow (20 week scan, 1 week late!!!)...I will see my Valentine again!!!!!!
Yes he is moving much more but only morning and evening....seems to be a sleepy head all afternoon! That said I still panic day and night - I couldn't handle losing another bundle - especially at this stage. 

Hugs to you all - katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Good Luck for tomorrow Katey - although you don't need it   . Orange is the colour of fertility: there's people on the site who either wear orange knickers, tie orange ribbon round their tummy, have orange flowers in the house, particularly when they're actively cycling, and the theory is that concentrating on the orange takes positive energy down to the womb and ovaries. There's one post where you can download a big orange spot and have it as a screensaver or background on the pc. I did and everytime I turned the pc on each day after ET, I sat for a minute and breathed in thinking of energy going down to the womb, nurturing the embryos.   Hope the dust has died down. Please let us know ASAP how the scan goes. Will be thinking of you.

Hi Laura - hope you're having a lovely sleep. The pj's sound lovely. You sound such a good cook. I'm making a stew tomorrow (Mrs romantic not!) - and now feel pressured into doing dumplings after your description. By the way, my bush stays as it is. I mentioned our discussion to DH   - said it looks fine   - and he's normally quite open about things. I'll find out when I see the look on the obstretrician's face in a few months  .

Hi Tracy. Had a lovely sleep thanks and woke up to baked salmon. Headache improved when DH massaged my feet. Nothing too special tomorrow - although I'm cooking, which DH would probably say was special. Admittedly in the last few weeks he has been a star and cooked a lot of evenings whilst I've had a nap as I seem to be so pooped by late afternoon. However, we do have a physical (and mental!) business, so it's not surprising.  Enjoy the champagne - have one for me  .

Hi Kim, hope everything is going ok.

Off to bed now.

Oh forgot - joke first:
A woman was giving birth and huffed and puffed until eventually the baby popped out. The baby looked up at the obstetrician and said - "Are you my father?" The dr, looking rather shocked said, "No I'm the dr", and with that the baby popped himself back into the womb. The anaesthetist came over and the baby popped out again. "Are you my father?" "No, I'm also a dr". The baby popped back in again. Very puzzled, the obstetrician went into the corridor and fetched the baby's father, "Please come", he said, "He wants to meet his daddy". The father walks in and the baby pops out again, "Are you my father?"  The father kneels down and says, "Yes son, I'm your daddy". The baby gets its forefinger and taps his father repeatedly on the forehead, "Annoying isn't it!?".

Night!


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)




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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Thanks Tracy - you're  a pal.

How did everything go Katey?

Hope the meal was good Laura and the champage Tracy - what did DP cook?

Bye for now. Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi

Just a quickie as I am tired as hell...long day...

scan was good. all looked fine - except his tummy measures 22 weeks and 5 days so I am obvioulsy feeding greedy guts too much!! The sonographer said she was very happy. He moved A LOT! Again, very apparent that it's a boy!

So relieved.

Lily + Laura - hope the stews were lovely and romantic!!! Laura's absence suggests that all might be very romantic!

Hi Tracy !!!

Kim hope all is well.

Off to bed as need to go to London early tomorrow for, hopefully, last IVIg.

Hugs, Katey xxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Great news Katey! Crikey our tummy will probably measure about 30 weeks then!

The stew was lovely and warming, romantic in that the butternut squash just melted in the mouth - yum! Hope it IS your last IVIg. Does that mean no more visits to London? That would a lot less tiring on you.

Hope you had a lovely night Laura and Tracy - we're waiting to hear ALL about it!  

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Peeps!

Last night was not that great, I was dead excited and then we had a bit of a tiff in the resturant, nothing major but it burst my bubble a bit!!  Food was nice though.  Didn't get on last night as was shattered and went to bed.

Had a very stressful day at work today too and can't even just chill tonight as need to get my stuff together for Devon tom.  Finishing work at 3 and heading down on the train.  Looking forward to it.  We are going to the zoo on sat  

So KT - So when will we know if this is going to be your last IVIg?  Are things all ok with Robin now?  Have you been thinking about names?  

Lily  - not long to your scan too!!  Oh I had you down for a boy but KT reckons a girl... what are your thoughts??
Oh your joke was great.

My fave joke is .....  What did the 0 say to the number 8?  'oh nice belt'....... Boom boom!!!

XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

well I'm not a happy bunny. Tim insisted on playing his playsatation al eve so I had to sit in bedroom and ony have access to channel 1 and 5!!  So we have had an arguement and agreed that tim will move out before I come home on sun.  Not a nice start to my weekend away. I don't know if I have PMT, am tired or if its the forthcoming IVF misery guts but its not nice and I feel very unloved.  

I'm off to bed and so will text you girls at the weekend.  Have a good one. XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Blimey Laura!   - are you serious? Or maybe it's a normal 'things said in heated moment' evening - we all have them .... Don't feel unloved - we all love you very much!!   

I hope you have a really lovely time with your pal and at the zoo. You returned from Egypt sounding so   and rested - hope the weekend brings some of our chilled out Laura back. Do text and let us know how things are....

Hi Katey, Tracy and Kim.

Very tired, may have to turn in soon....

Lots of love, Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Laura...are you being serious or messing

Hi everyone else!

Katey xxx


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## buster24 (Jul 11, 2005)

hi all well i arrived back last night. after all those drugs only had 5 follicles and on day of egg collection 10/02/07 he managed to get 2 eggs one of which they thought might not fertilise, but it was a wee fighter and it did. It was a wee fighter.
he flushed the follicles 10 times to make sure there were no more. we were really disapointed at the time. ET was on the 12th so i am on the mad knicker checking wait now. have had some lower abdo pain, think this is due to the work he was doing on the follicles, well i hope thats what it is. so its all down to the gods now.
sorry never wrote earlier but internet connection was not great in hotel.
hope everyone is well. will catch up with all the posts later.
kimxxxx


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Excellent news Kim - 2 beanies on board! WOOHOO! So pleased you got back to us, we've been thinking of you. Keep in touch over the next few days until the BIG day!

Hi Katey and Laura - hope you're both ok.

Treated myself to some berry plants today - raspberry, blackberry, tayberry and blackcurrant - yummy - I so desperate to taste them, but will have to wait until late summer....

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Kim that's fantastic news! You must be very chuffed! And yes, what a little fighter you've got yourself!!! Take it easy now and thing sticky thoughts!!

Lily - yummy they do sound good. I love berries but have no idea how to grow them...always got the impression that they could become a little mad and hard to handle ().

I am feeling much better today - no more bad signs! Have my cervix scan tomorrow morning so nervous, but positive. If I have to do a handstand for the rest of this pg to keep the baby in then that's what i'll do!

Hi Tracy and Hi Laura (hope Devon is a blast!)

Off to cook lunch for the parents - again!! - catch you later
Katey xxx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi girls

Sorry not had time to catch up with your gossip  dashing around like mad at the mo - painted the kitchen ceiling yesterday by hand with an emulsion brush  my bloomin arms, neck and shoulders are killing me now!!!

Just a quicky for Kim really, but also for you other three lovely ladies

Kim - we decided to rename this thread - disillusioned is a bit wrong!!! We need a nice motivating name, but we didnt want to change it before you came back in case you couldnt find us 

So, one of the suggestions was The Muskateers!! Is everyone happy with that? Or are there any others? I have one - Ladies of Hope!! Soon as we decide I will change the name

Love and huge hugs
Tracy
x


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Ladies,
Tracy - love the hair! Nice photo. Ladies of hope sounds good too, as whatever stage one is in, it's hope that keeps us going. Is it possible to have more than 3 muskateers - Katey, Laura and Kim - help!

Hi Katey - hope you're taking it easy. Please let us know asap tomorrow - please! I'm at clinic too - but no scan. Yes, some berries can go a bit wild, but the raspberries and blackberries will be trained up wires and any stray canes pulled up and replanted in a controlled fashion. We spent the day digging and creating the soft fruit corner and putting up rabbit proof fencing. Hopefully some room for summer and winter squashes too.

Hi Laura, how was the weekend? And of course how's things back home? Thinking of you  .

Hi Kim - how's it going? Hope you're ok.

Bye for now, Lots of love, Lilyxx.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls.

Well I had a lovely time at the zoo!! and my friends place is lovely.  I was very jealous!!  was a grotty train jourey back lots of delays but am home now.

Me and tim are ok (ish) he has been out a bought some fancy dinner and is just cooking it.  Think he feels a bit bad over our row, but to be honest I think it was me and my hormones that was fueling it.  Must get that under control! 

Kim - great to have you back with those wee ones on board!! When is test day?

Katey - hope things are ok.  One of the ladies on the EPT board had to have a stitch in her cervix at about 22 weeks.  She said it was a bit uncomfy but fine.  If need be i'll pop up with my sewing kit... we are not seeing Eric for a good few months yet!!  Bit scarey I bet.  XX

Lily - how are you? I love berry's too my dad grows them on his allotment and then saves them in the freezer so I can have them all year round! Yum!

Tracey - Nice hair!  And as for the name I don't mind what we are called, maybe with my recent antics we ahould be called 'hormonally erratic'!!!!  So long a I know it and can find you all I don't mind!

Oh and I was looking in my diary on the train and guess what I've done.... booked the complete wrong weeks off work! Dur!     So I now have to rearrange all my leave and all my meetings!! Oh I'm officially on my cycle now, started the pill on sat will ring up tom to get my baseline scan booked in.  new dates are roughly EC around mothers day and test day easter sunday! 

XXXXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Hi Laura - Great to have you back  . You two really are a pair though! What's for dinner? And WOOHOO we're back on cycle - that's excellent news - so it's     from here onwards.... Block all negative thoughts from your body and concentrate on fertile, orange things! No more arguments, just lots of energy zooming to your womb please!

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

MMMMmmmm.  Was thai fish cakes and then green thia curry!  

I will try with the positive thinking and the not arguing!!  I promise Lily!!

XX


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## kateyl (Jun 12, 2005)

Hi

Well seeing as all I do is hope, that sounds good to me.

Glad to have you back Laura - even gladder (is that a word) that you and Mr T are back on track...gastronomy can cure all!! AND...yeah...a new cycle! Positive orange glow being sent your way.

Lily - You are such a garden expert! I sooooooo wish I was.  Less of the digging though!

Tracy - LOVE the new look! 

Kim - Sticky thoughts!!!

Hugs, katey xxx

ps Laura - you stay away from me with that sewing kit!


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Girls

Brrrr I'm cold.  had a pleasant day at workjust did a couple of review if feltham so not been in the office which was nice and I'm working from home tomorrow!!  

I've been trying to get in touch with barts to sort out my scan date and ask some advice about the needles and my protocol as I want to get my dates all corretc before I pester my boss with changing my leave dates and can I gt through?? No!  Finally got through today and left a message on the answer phone and stil noone has called me back. I'm not a happy bunny!

Anyway how are you two?  

Lily - when is your scan?  Must be soon.   

Kt - bet you will sleep soundly tonight knowing all is well with Eric (do you like the name??)  Have you had any thoughts?  I like Noah or Nathan?  Tims nephew was Noah but he died   so if we have a boy we will use that as a middle name, if SIL is ok with it.

I've been thinking alot about why I keep being so horrid to tim.  I've felt very insecure since all of this started and he says hes not going to leave me but in the back of my head I keep thinking he could just go and have a baby like that at the drop of a hat with his super sperm.  And I think I'm being so demanding because I want constant reassurance that he isn't going to leave me.  Daft but can't help my emotions.  I was thinking of getting married?  I've never wanted to before but Tim has.  Maybe that would make me feel more settled and secure? Or will it just stress me out more?  I've always said I would marry him if we had kids so we could all that the same name.  And if we are thinking to adopting we would have to anyway.

Anyway I'm thinking too much for a monday night... must be time for Eastenders?!

XXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Evening ladies,
Sorry to hear you can't get through to Barts Laura - how frustrating! Maybe try really early tomorrow, like 8am? or whenever you think they start. Glad you're working from home, or will much work get done I wonder?   How's the studywork? What you're feeling about Tim able to leave anytime, is sooo normal and you'd be extremely abnormal not to feel it, but listen to him - he's not going. He could have done Sunday right, but didn't. I think we've really got to work on relaxing your mind before you get much more into this cycle! Where's Katey? Help! ALL negative thoughts must be banished for the next few weeks until test day. You've decided to go for it - so we need all +ve thoughts! all energies to the womb and none spent on anything else right now. If you feel -ve thoughts or an argument brewing, just remind yourself you're taking energy away from where it's needed, ie at keeping your body balanced and calm.

Hi Katey - glad the scan went well - sooo reassuring. Bit early for you on here yet  . Well Laura has started the ball rolling with the name suggestions, are you going to indulge us in any? Whatever sex it is, DH and I can't decide on any.

Have got scan booked for 2 weeks time - scarey!

Bye for now, Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

One of the barts girls gave me the nurses email so I've sent that off.  Hopefully have a response tom.  

Oh your scan I'm so excited!!  Are we finding out??  I so can't wait.  Weirdly mine and tims girls names are Lily (after his nan) and Katie (because I like it)! Spooky.  But know i know you two we will have to think of something else if we get there. 

Both of you must have some ideas??  I like Jessica and Amelia too.  Girls names are easy I think.  

Hmmmm... more boys names.  I like old names I must admit.  Samuel? Jacob? Archie, Albert??

I guess we should start making some baby names lists.  You two must have some ideas?


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

No - none! Everytime I come up with a name, I either get fed up with it after about 3 seconds, or DH says no immediately. I've decided to wait for the two weeks, then think again - of course I'll tell you the sex! I would like a traditional British name with a Spanish twist (DH partly Spanish). I could only find Isobel so far, which is Spanish version of Elizabeth, but guess what DH says no as it's too popular round here....

Where's Katey? Maybe celebrating after her reassuring news.

Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Oh I like Isobel.  hmmm something spanishy... I'll have a think.  I didn't know he was part spanish. Very nice.  

Where is KT? she is prob celebrating with an early night (as in had no sleep all weekend, not early night wink wink type of early night).  Poor Robin.. he prob still not played hide the sausage yet!!

Hi to Kim and Tracey! XX


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Where is Kt?  I will text her if she not on by lunch.  I'm sure she just resting up after her traumatic weekend. X


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

well the hospital called back.  My scan date is on the 7th March, so should start stims on about the 14th March.  And roughly my test date will be Friday the 13th!!!  If of course I get that far. X


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

Excellent news Laura - love the Ticker - very     well done!   Have you heard from KT? I'll text too, if I don't hear back from you.

Love Lily. xx
Don't know why but have spent 75% of today crying - must be the hormones.


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Hi Lily,

I'm glad for some company!

I did text Kt earlier and she is fine.

Did you see the baby on the news, youngest baby to survive, she was born at 10oz at 22weeks!  Bless her came out of hospital today.  Is amazing.  Just think your baby is about that size too.

I have been reading most of today a book called Conquering infertility someone reccommeded it to me.  Its about dealing with the stress and anxiety.  Explains how anxiety reduces the chances of conceiving.  If you are feeling depressed during your cycle your chances drop to 13% success rather than 29%.  Is very interesting.  So I am trying to get stress free (ha!).  Meeting tim when he finishes work and going for a swim.  It actually says yoga swimming fine but heavy gym and aerobics are out as it takes the blood away from your womb!  So I'm just going to go walking/ swimming.

I wish we were closer and then I could come around and give you a big cuddle.  Why are you so sad? Anything on your mind?  You are normally so positive. XXXXX


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## LilyAnne (Oct 18, 2003)

I already like your new book - it's what I've been trying to tell you! Maybe I didn't explain it well.

Don't know why I keep crying. I asked myself why I was, during the last 30 minute session. DH and I had an argument this am, which we sorted, but I feel a bag of nerves and after trying all afternoon to work it out, I think it's the 20 week scan. I am really petrified; I suppose more so 'cos it's taken so long to get here and so much sorrow, I can't believe everything will be alright. Also, having had the ICSI makes me worry more that something will show up. Then my nan worried me last night, as she was surprised I hadn't felt anything yet. So now I'm worried it's just lying there and not moving.... Blimey, sorry for all this - I sound so stupidly ungrateful to be where I am. Nobody knows about the IVF and how long it's taken. My family all think it was a surprise conception, so it's difficult to handle them too.

Thanks for the offer of a hug, made me feel better anyway.

Glad KT's ok. You enjoy your swim and give Tim a big kiss - so romantic in water: Don't get too carried away though, else you'll get chucked out!  

Lots of Love Lily. xx


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## laurab (Apr 17, 2006)

Oh honey, I know you are grateful to be in this wonderful position but it doesn't mean you can stop worrying.  But I'm sure from other ladies that you don't normally feel things until after the 20 week mark so please don't worry about that.  Your nan hasn't been pregnant for a while I'd imagine!!  Maybe you should try some of your own advice?  A little meditation?  a visualisation of your little one growing inside of you?    I can't promise tht everything will be fine, I'm a bit of a scientist, so look at the stats, the chances of anything being wrong is so so small.  I want you to be excited, you are going to find out if your first baby is going to be a little girl or a little boy!!  Please try to have a little faith in your body, you are fit and healthy and there is nothing to suggest that anything is wrong. XXXX

As fpr me and Tim we normally go in the outside pool and noone else will be out there at this time of year!


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi girls

Hope you are all ok! I am going to start us a new thread with a new name - a combination of both ideas - The Hopeful Muskateers!

I have PM'd Kim to tell her so she can find us 

Catch you soon on the new thread

Love and hugs
Tracy
xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Ok girls, this way to your new home >>>>>>>http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=85566.0


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