# Where do we start?!



## Rainbowstace (Jul 31, 2013)

Hi so I am totally new to this and all the terminology etc so excuse my ignorance! 

My partner and I have been together 12 years and have now decided that we want to start a family. We have considered adoption but I have endometriosis and really would like to try and carry our baby due to my illness I have been having treatment for pain on and off for 6 years but now I'm off medication and physically in a good place my consultant has said though that really if I want to conceive I need to do it now before my stamp tons worsen. 

We have decided I will carry if I can and will use my eggs and donor sperm we don't want to use anyone we know. 

I see my consultant for a check up after my last operation at the end of August and we have made an appointment to see the gp on Friday to ask for a referral to the fertility clinic at the hospital I am under. 


Is there anything else we need to do? 
Has anyone managed to get nhs funding since the new guidance came into effect? 
Has anyone else been in this position with endometriosis? 

Any other tips, experience timescales anyone could help with would be great. 

Thanks in advance 


Xxxx


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## incywincy (Nov 13, 2011)

Hi!  This bit at the start when you don't know anything is quite daunting!  You've found a great resource in this forum, so much information.

Funding is very hit and miss and it's very dependent on your Primary Care Trust.  Your best bet is to scour their website and see what their fertility treatment policies are.  Be warned that even if you qualify for funding you might have a longish wait for NHS treatment.

If you want to be treated at a clinic privately with anon sperm you have several options.  You could have IUI (where they place sperm into your uterus when you're ovulating) in this country which is a bit pricey and doesn't have a massive success rate but plenty of people do conceive with it.  You could have IUI abroad, which I did, it's so much cheaper in places like Denmark but the flights etc do mount the costs up.  It's still got a low success rate (10-25%) but it is not very invasive.  

The next option is to look at IVF.  It's more invasive, more expensive, has better success rates but still isn't foolproof.  I opted for an egg sharing scheme where the treatment costs are reduced because you donate half your eggs to someone who needs them.  You have to have a certain level of fertility which the clinic tests for and you can't carry any hereditary disorders.  A couple of London clinics do really good deals where the IVF is free for sharers and all you have to do is buy the sperm.  Sperm can be imported for around £1200, making your IVF very cheap and similar in price to IUIs.  I use Care Manchester which doesn't offer free IVF, but a reduced cost and their sperm is cheaper so it cost me around £2000 for one go of IVF, still massively cheaper than full price.  The downside is you do give away half your eggs and if you're not successful first time this means less frozen to try again.

Personally, I wish I hadn't wasted time doing IUIs and just gone straight to IVF but this isn't for everyone.

I don't know how the endometriosis will affect your chances of conceiving but it's not necessarily a barrier to egg sharing, if your ovarian reserve is high enough.  

If I were in your position now, I'd enquire about NHS funding - your endometriosis might get you some, but also start just making a list of private clinics in the area and their prices, and also read up about IUI and IVF and take it all from there.

It's a lot to take in at first but the more you can find out to start with, the better.  Ask as many questions on here as you want, the IUI and IVF sections are very useful and you might find help about the endo in the diagnosis part too.  There's so many people here with different experiences, such a great source of info!  I learned pretty much everything about TTC from here.


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## Rainbowstace (Jul 31, 2013)

Hi thank you so much for a response - I think daunting is definitely the word! Going to speak to our GP tomorrow so fingers crossed she is supportive. 

I find the funding aspect so confusing - the criteria seems to be that you have tried to conceive for two years which in a same sex relationship isn't exactly possible! It also seems to suggest that if you pay for IUI and six don't work you can get IVF on NHS but I accept this will increase waiting times. 

Anyway fingers crossed - could be a long road ahead!! 

Thanks again I'm off to do more research


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## RainbowRainbow (Dec 9, 2012)

Hi and welcome!

One thing is for sure it all seems like a huge mountain of jargon, meds and finance at the beginning but within a matter of weeks you soon become experts!

For us to be NSH funded in our area we both (even though only I would have been carrying and using donor sperm) had to have a BMI of under 30, good quality egg reserve (this is proven by a blood test) good hormone levels and under 35. This bit wasn't too taxing BUT we also had to have self-funded 6 IUI. There was our problem - we just didn't have enough money for 6 IUI and also by the time we would have got the money and had 6 IUI I would have turned 35 so not qualified anyway!

So we have started on medicated IUI and we have enough money for a few tries at that....if they all fail - well we're not sure yet!

This forum and others similar are quite literally life-savers. Not many people know what we are doing and those that do certainly don't want to hear about every little detail everyday! On here there are so many people who know exactly what to expect and give wonderful and patience advice.

Good luck with your GP x


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## Rainbowstace (Jul 31, 2013)

Hi again - GP app went well she didn't have a lot of information but referred us straight away to our preferred clinic then I am going for routine blood tests Monday scary but exciting! X


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## sarahsuperdork (Mar 12, 2013)

Hi, good luck on your journey! I agree, the NHS funding criteria is complicated and differs from area to area, which can lead to a frustrating postcode lottery. My local PCT funds when there are known fertility issues - usually, you'd only know that if you tried and a same-sex couple can't really do that! My GP was great and referred me for plenty of tests to check whether I might gave fertility issues before we paid for private IUI. I even had a laparoscopy on the NHS to check my tubes. Turns out they were blocked so I did qualify for funding. 

It's good that your GP has referred you.  Try to get as much done through your GP as they'll allow as private tests can add up. Even if you don't qualify for funding, getting blood tests done through your GP can save you a lot of money.


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## Rainbowstace (Jul 31, 2013)

Hi Sarah thanks I'm under my hospital for endometriosis I've had three laps and although they have found  adhesions and Endo I'm lucky as my ovaries and tubes haven't been affected. Hopefully with the support tod my gp and consultant we might qualify for funding but if not we are happy to pay. I suppose the decision then is so you just go for IVF with increased success rate. Can I ask how much your IUI has cost? Are you having any luck? And how long have you been trying? Sorry for all the questions xx


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## sarahsuperdork (Mar 12, 2013)

I can't have IUI, I only have one tube now and it's damaged so it would be unlikely to work for me. I'm currently in my first cycle of IVF, due to start stimms next week all being well. It's our first go so not sure what to expect but it's been ok so far. We only have one funded cycle so fingers crossed! You may find that you're eligible for funding and with your endo, good luck.


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## Rainbowstace (Jul 31, 2013)

Oh well this is great good luck with your treatment it's nice to hear how everyone is getting along! W w have been to gp and got our first appointment at the clinic next Wednesday cannot wait! Xx


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