# I spoke for all of us today in Waitrose.....



## kelway (Dec 9, 2006)

i am generally pretty careful when choosing a queue to pay in waitrose as i often fall foul by standing behind a pg women. this in itself for obvious reasons ain't a pleasurable experience at the best of times but add a chatty cashier who seem more often than not drawn to pg women with a desire to discuss their impending birth. anyway, i had to queue behind a pg wome today and worse still was the REALLY chatty enthusiastic cashier, slow due to excited discussion of the birth etc etc. by the time my turn came (the store was pretty quiet, noone behind me in the queue, at this point anyway.....) she said to me 'sorry for taking so long, i was chatting', and my resonse.....'yes i know, i wished i hadn't had to listen to your discussion. i myself cannot have another baby'. you should have seen the women's face. she felt really guilty (i did in part as she had done nothing wrong, it is not her fault i have secondary infertility) but i spoke out doing all of us a service really. we chatted, i was very friendly but very much tinged with sadness which i didn't bother to hide, i am due on. she said (grr) she knew how i felt as she had had two mc's. i asked her if she had gone on to complete her family and she said proudly that she had, a boy and a girl. i told her that not all of us were so lucky and that a daily trip to the supermarket was more often than not a source of terrible anxiety and pain to women like me who were not (or at least did not appear) to be so fortunate.
xx


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## cinders35 (Feb 23, 2007)

Wow Kelway.

Thankyou.
Thankyou so much. I have tears in my eyes, tears of appreciation.
I'm sorry this has been sat here so long, I often as not go straight to daily thread without checking board, which I presume other girls do too.
I really admire you.
Sorry this is so waffly, but thanks again.
Love Cindersxxx


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## SUSZY (Nov 3, 2006)

me too kelway
you were so good to say that for us all - we appreciate it
sorry have not been on for a few days what with sunday and yest my mums bday and have been tryng to do non baby connected things having lunch and drinking wine - just generally trying to escape but I am so with you and well done for that.
if so feel like that and after being so careful who I tell what I drop in now that I manged to get preg again and then m/c and its been a tough few months before nearly starting to cry
anyway take care jo
love
susie


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## Pand (Jan 25, 2007)

Kelway,

Good for you.  I think I will take a leaf out of your book.  Yesterday at ds's school assembly one of his friend's mums asked if ds wanted to come round to play during the holidays.  She then went on to say the obvious, "have you only got the one?"  I sort of spluttered "I'm afraid so," but didn't add to it.  She went bumbling on saying "Oh I'm sure my son has told me yours has got a baby!"  DH was really cross with me for not just telling her straight and I wish I had, but I worry that people will think I'm just a bitter old bag.  But instead, I've ended up feeling upset, and she hasn't learnt not to be so flipping tactless!  Wish I had your strength. Next time I'm going to try and take a leaf from your book!

Love to you hun

Pand


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## kelway (Dec 9, 2006)

hi pand, i stand tall and proud and thus have never hidden what is going on with me in that area, kind of stubborn, warts n' all. when i fell pg both times, when i had a miscarriage, through secondary infertility i always talk openly about what is going on with me, my way of dealing with things (i hide my terrible shy and insecure side, it is a front really). i admit i also like to shock and have a slightly wicked side ie i know i make people feel  uncomfortable by my telling them (in response to their nonsense comments) i cannot have another (i know two wrongs are not supposed to make a right but i think at times they do!!). i am not ashamed of my infertility or my age, it just 'is'. all the best joxx


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## SUSZY (Nov 3, 2006)

Hi jo and everyone else
I think perhaps we should all take a stand but we need to feel strong when we do and not just burst into tears!
I was also thinking looking at thread again that perhaps Jo you and hubbie could do the photos for Cinders book as SHE IS GOING TO WRITE ONE - i think we could all write a story, it could be a load of short stories and I think I have people lined up to help as we need a chapter on secondary, ED, mc, c-section and we might have room for some adverts!  
We will together promote this and be there for each other.
love you all as ever
love
susie


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