# Just so tired...



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

im tired...

tired of the sadness

tired of the constant pain

tired of finding strength

tired of 'being ok'

tired of the fear

tired of getting on with life

tired of faking smiles

tired of the dull ache in my chest

tired of the sickness in the pit of my stomach

tired of feeling incompetent

tired of reminding myself of the blessing i do have

tired of the deep breath i take when i hear one of those 'questions'

tired of never knowing

tired of hoping

im just so tired...


----------



## hilly35 (Feb 14, 2012)

Oh sweetie - that really brought a tear to my eye.   It was so well written and boy have I been there. I really hope and pray this is your time. Hang in there and be nice to yourself while you are.

Thinking of you


----------



## EssieJean (Aug 11, 2011)

Oh *Haydan*   - I agree with everyone of those, you summed it all up for me perfectly 

Wishing you strength and happiness
Essie
xx


----------



## Lolem (Sep 1, 2014)

Wow. That made me cry. It describes the situation so perfectly. You aren't alone.


----------



## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Oh lovely.  Yes, just plain tired sums it all up.  I never thought that I would wake up every day and think sigh, another day, plod on.

Sending you the hugest of   xx


----------



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

Thank you ladies; i really do get so much of my strength from this forum.

sending you all   

lets keep going


----------



## Pollybear1 (Sep 5, 2014)

All can think when I read this is me too, and its so lonely
xxx


----------



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

The loneliness is consuming- I only feel 'normal' when I come on here 👭


----------



## Pollybear1 (Sep 5, 2014)

Coming on  here definitely makes me feel like i'm more normal. Is like a bit of  sanity when nothing makes sense.


----------



## rubster (Jul 26, 2011)

Haydan,

I felt your tiredness and fedupness jumping off the screen. It's so unfair to have to struggle for every ounce of happiness when it just seems to come so easily to so many. I hope you feel better soon

R xxx


----------



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

Thanks Rubster xxx


----------



## Baking Queen (Jul 7, 2014)

Thanks Haydan - I couldn't have put it better myself. You've summed up how I feel to a tee.
BQ. xx


----------



## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Can I add.....

Tired of searching for new miracle supplement

Tired of opening eagerly awaited new miracle supplement and thinking 'what the hell do these do again?'

x


----------



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

everything just goes blurry now when i look at supplements - i cant differentiate the information anymore


----------



## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Ditto, I swallowed it along with the other 12 and thought what does it matter


----------



## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

to be honest i think the main reason i take the supplements is to gain a bit of control over the situation - it helps a little bit


----------



## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

That's just so true Haydan, it does give you some control.  That's certainly why I take them, though quite how I think they'll improve DH's sperm I don't know and my lining isn't thickening for anything


----------

