# As an egg donor...what are OH's views?



## sambam (Mar 23, 2007)

After successful IVF myself, am seriously considering becoming a donor. Have thought about this for a very long time & spent many sleepless nights mulling over things. My main sticking point is DH. Not one to chat or read any literature etc, his attitude is 'well, I wouldn't want to donate, but whatever suits you....'. Obviously we all know it's different from a woman's point of view, particularly having been struck with the pain of infertility myself & knowing what it's like. I really want to take his true thoughts into consideration, but since I can't get through to him, am wondering what experiences other donor's have had with their OH's? How did it affect your relationship? One worry is that if a child contacted me in 18 yrs, would he feel 'left out' so to speak & resentful? 


Thanks to anyone who can help. Please feel free to PM me if you'd prefer. x


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## Maybethistime (Oct 20, 2008)

Sambam I know what you means it's good to give something back... Another thing to do would be to act as an advisor to people who are starting on the journey and advise them on what you have learned. I was lucky enough to meet someone who said you can ask me anything you want to know and was there for every question regardless of how silly it seemed... I always though that when I become a mother that is what I would like to do as well. Or you could train as a doula to help women in pregnancy and childbirth. That way you are keeping dh happy, are giving something back and are also doing something fulfilling and satisfying..


E


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