# Newbie returns. ^



## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Hi all,

I am kind of a newbie as I've posted on here before, but been away for quite a while as nothing was happening.  I now feel as if things might - finally!! - be moving and would really appreciate hearing from other people just starting out like me.

I have just had my HSG done and am waiting for my results to come back and an appointment with my consultant - why does it all take sooooo long on the NHS ?!?!?  And why can't they tell you the resuts of the HSG straight away ?!?!?

Anyway.....I am 30 - DH is 32 - and we've been TTC for about 5 years now.  It's taken us almost 2 years just to get this far!  I was diag. with PCOS and told that I had to lose weight before they would treat me!  Well, have finall managed that (yiipppeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!) and have (almost!) managed to give up smoking, so just want things to get started.

Is there anyone else out there in the same stage as me ??  What should happen next ??  I'm feeling really excited, nervous and impatient about it all and would just like to chat to people in the same position as all my friends are either popping out babies like rabbits or are not even thinking of having them yet!

Anyway, thanks for listening - hope to hear back from someone.

N xxx


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## m5chy (Feb 14, 2007)

hi n,
i've been through this for the last year now but with many experiences so full of helpful info....
can't help with the way the nhs works as have gone private all the way coz can't bear the wait but once you get your hsg results this will give them an indication of how your body will respond to drugs...you've got along way to go but ihope it will be straight forward with no complications.
keep in touch 
michy xx


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## *shelly* (Jan 26, 2007)

Hi 
i'm due to hsg done in next few weeks, so i'm at a similar stage to you. i'm so nervous about it. what was it like?

I agree about the nhs. we have been waiting ages to get this far. we have looked into going private but the clinic said that the nhs seem to have got themselves moving for us now so there would be no point at the moment. so for now we are sticking with it.

i'd love to hear from you, let me know how everything goes. hope your test results are god.

michelle x


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Thanks for your replies!  I've just spoken to the hospital and have been told that my appointment with my consultant for the results of the HSG is in 5 weeks!  I know that probably is good, but seems so long to wait when all I can think about is this!!!!!!!!!!

Michelle - I was absolutely terrified about having the HSG done as I'd heard really mixed things about it.  I guess everyone is different, but I can honestly say that it was fine for me.  It's not pleasant, but I only found it slightly more uncomfortable than a smear - hope you find it the same  
I've found that the worst bit is the waiting - nothing happened for ages for me, which was probably not helped by my hospital closing down at Christmas!!  Have now been moved to another hospital which is brand new and seems to be in total chaos!  2 appointments there so far - both have been over an hour delayed!
What has your consultant told you so far ?  Feel free to PM me if you want to chat !

Keep in touch!!


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## *shelly* (Jan 26, 2007)

hi

Thanks for your reply. I'm not sure how to pm so i thought it would be easier to just reply on here! I couldn't find the button to do it!

I am waiting to be refered to the fertility clinic at my hospital at the moment, so i haven't really been told much. My doctor refered me to the hospital 14 months ago as i have really irregular periods - they are all over the place. they did some blood tests and a scan as they thought i had pcos, but the scan confirmed i didn't. i was then told to wait until it had been a year as there was no reason why i shouldn't be able to get pregnant. I had my 1st appointment since then at the end of jan, where they decided to start some investigation tests and to refer me to the fertility clinic. So i am slightly in the dark as to what the problem is or what will be happening next. I suppose i will get more answers when i get an appointment with the fertility clinic.

i just really hate the waiting, i'm so impatient!! we may wait for the hsg and the next few blood tests i need to have and then go private. we have spoke to a clinic we like the look of, they told us to stay with the nhs for the time being as the timescale we have been given at the moment is similar to what it would be with them as we couldn't get an appontment until march. It just seems as though everything is done so slowly and backwards. and then you have to wait weeks to find out the results! (which you know, as you now have a 5 week wait) One of the nurses at my last appointment asked why i'd been sent to them and said i should have been refered straight to the fertility clinic!

What tests etc have you had so far? Did they give any indication of the hsg results when you had it?

Sorry for waffling so much!! I'd love to keep in touch.

michelle x


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Hi Nix76, welocme to FF  

I cant understand why they didnt tell you ur results of your HSG. They did for me but then i suppose every hospital is different. I had mine done which gave me the all clear on my tubes so ive been put on metformin for 4 months which is supposed to reduce the cysts on my ovaries which should in turn help me to ovulate. Not sure how far you have got with ur specialist but excellent job on the weight loss. I'm in the process of trying, though im struggling at the mo lol. 
Tell me about waiting times...the worst is when they change it and you get a letter through the post (always phone and have a moan usually they will change it back  )
Let me know how you get on and good luck for your next appointment any questions just ask and i will try to help

Hi *shelly*
Good luck for your Hsg. Its more uncomfortable then painful and ask for the results while you are there otherwise you might have to wait a couple of months before knowing the results, which can be agony.

Lots of cuddles
dakota xx


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Hi there Nix and welcome _back_ to FF 

Glad things have started moving along for you now honey. I do understand what you mean - the waiting times between treatments/diagnosis/results etc with the NHS seem to take forever! Sometimes it's like they don't understand how anxious we are to find out and to get on with the nitty gritty of Trying To Conceive! I have every sympathy with you honey 

I will leave you a couple of links to some of our boards that you may find of interest

For PCOS *CLICK HERE**

For Inbetween Treatment CLIICK HERE

For Giving Up Smoking whilst TTC CLICK HERE

We also have a brilliant chatroom Nix - if you are not sure how to use the chatroom, please just send myself or Dizzi Squirrel a Personal Message and we will be happy to meet you in there at a prearranged time to show you the ropes. It doesn't take long, ten mins max, and I am sure you will find chatting to people who really understand what you are going through is sooooo good!!

*********

I wish you lots of    and 

If you need any help at all, just give me a shout

Love and hugs
Tracy
x*


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## Kamac80 (Nov 24, 2005)

Hi nix and welcome back to the site.

Good luck with everything and hope the site will be a continued support to u.

Kate xx​


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Hey everyone!

Thanks so much for all your replies - really makes me feel a bit more sane coming on here!

Dakota - as soon as I walked into the room for my HSG the nurse said "we won't give you your results"!!  I did try asking if they could at least hint, but they seemed really adament that they weren't going to tell me anything and I decided not to annoy the woman with the big metal clamp down there      I am gonna call them back on Monday though to see if they could give me the results down the phone if they won't bring the appointment forward - can't hurt to try!

Michelle - I haven't had any tests apart from the HSG really.  I was told on my first appointment that they thought I had PCOS and just as I was leaving the nurse said that she would do a quick internal scan which confirmed it.  We waited months for an appointment with my consultant - who is a vile man and who I cannot imagine showing a scrap of emotion ever!! - only to be told that I was overweight and until get down to a target BMI that they would not treat me!!  Now I am certainly no Kate Moss, but as I was only a size 14 (16 on a bad day!!) really couldn't understand why it was such an issue and was really upset to be told this so bluntly  .  I have had all the (I assume!) usual blood tests, which have all come back as "normal".  Am still very much in limbo at the moment - hopefully the next appointment will be the one where I move forward. FINGERS CROSSED!!!!!!

Please call keep in touch, I wish you all TONS of luck and    

Look forwrad to chatting again soon.

Nix xxxx


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Arrrghghghghghgh!!!!

Have just spoken to hospital and they can't/won't give me the results of my HSG over the phone as they are apparently not held there, but somewhere else.  So now have to wait until my appointment to find out.

Am feeling very   now - I know no is could be good new or whatever, but just feeling very low today.  Can't stop thinking about the results and thought that if I knew the outcome then I could at least focus on what the next steps might be.

Anyway - just thought I'd write it down here as am at work so can't really talk about it here and feel a bit like I want to scream !!!!!!!

Thanks for listening - lots of     to you all.

N x


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## MissTC (May 8, 2006)

Aw Nix honey, sorry you were so disappointed today  

Always here if you need a chat/rant/rave/ whatever    

Take good care hun
Love
Tracy
x


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## saze1982 (Jan 30, 2007)

Hello I'm new to this site by one month in exactly the same position as yourself but I don't have any diagnoses. I have been told to go away and try naturally for 6 months before they will do anything else. SO here I am and this site and ppl like yourself are my saviours!!!!! 

Try to stay relaxed!! 

Get intouch any day you like 

Sarah xx


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Hey Nix

All hospitals must have different procedures regarding giving results out, although what difference it makes wether you find out there and then or you have to wait  
You have probley heard this before but try something that will take your mind off things, I know its a nightmare waiting for results, even when you do find out you then think about what will happen at your app and what help you will get. Ive taken up swimming as a hobbie and help get fit, its not a lot but it does help to pu tyour mind elsewhere   When is your next app for results? Good luck for then and keep me posted

Huggles
dakota xx


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Thanks so much for replying - really does help  

Having a rubbish day today - haven't stopped   since I got up this morning.  Recieved the letter confirming my appointment, which I was told would be with my consultant, but they have sent us back to square one.  We are being sent for the initial assessment with the clinic again.  I know (or at least hope!!) it's just a mistake, but I think it was the final staw this morning.  Doesn't help that AF is due and I always feel a bit     anyway (lucky DH !!).

Anyway, I am trying to put it to the back of my mind now - have hoovered the house wailing like a mad woman (neighbours are probably on the phone to the men in white coats right now!) and thought I would log on here to rant and try to calm down.

Thanks so much for listening (again!) - it helps so much to be able to "talk" to people who really understand.  DH tries and always says "just remember I love you lots no matter what", but sometimes you just need to rant at people who actually get it dont you ?

Please all keep in touch and let me know how you're all getting on - hope I can help some of you out too !

Wishing you all lots and lots of     and big hugs (don't know how to do those little hug pictures ?!?!).

Nix xxxxx


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Keep your chin up Nix  

If you feel your getting nowhere, why not look into changing cons. Sometimes we need a boost. Last time i went to see my cons I didnt really ask much questions. I tend to go all quiet and timid when im in the room. so this time im preparing myself with information and my knowledge of the different procedures and how it all works so when i go back in april i can start to get a grip with what medications im on, whats the next step etc etc. I just tend to sit there and nod my head at everything he says. Its usually my Dp who pipes up and says oh what side affects will she get and how will this help. (I think it must be my nerves as every app im terrified he will say right thats all we can do for you, you will never have a family - this is my worst nightmare) Since  finding this website Ive learnt an awful lot that I didnt know before. I didnt have a clue what treatments there were that could help me. I feel a lot more confident knowing as before i was waiting to be told when it got to that point.

Any way sorry to ramble on lol

Huggles
dakota xx


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Hi Dakota,

Thanks for replying  

Well, am much more sane today (monday) - spoke to hospital and letter was a mistake!!  I have got appointment with cons, so hopefully we might be getting somewhere !!!!

I know EXACTLY what you mean!!  I am normally quite a confident, outspoken person but each appointment I've had I have just sat there nodding and not asked anything !  I think I'm going to make a list to take with me to try and remind me what I want to know!  DH never says a word in the appointments - he is very supportive to me, but sometimes I feel as if it just means more to me than to him - I guess it's different. 

Good luck for your appointment in April    

Take care and keep in touch !

Nix.  xxxx


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## kitten1 (Jan 1, 2007)

Hi Nix!! 

 and welcome to FF - the best site in the world!! ( As far as Im concerned!!    )

Like you, I too am in the initial frustrating stages - I have my HSG a week on Wednesday. Not looking forward to it but I spose it'll be nothing compared to labour!!!!!!     

 for all the upset you've been through. Our clinic won't even give us DP's SA results even though the consultant said that if his results had improved, THEN I would need the HSG! Ah well, as you can see below, not long for our appointment so we'll find out then.

If you ever need a rant, come and join us in the chatroom. I'm there most days (!) and I would be pleased to show you the ropes.

Wishing you lots of    for your appointment. Have some bubbles for luck!!  
      

See ya soon!!

Mandy xx


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Hi Mandy,

I kept telling myself the same thing while waiting for the HSG - if I want babies, this'll be NOTHING compared to labour     

I found the HSG OK actually, so hopefully you'll be fine hun !  Let me know how you get on !

I noticed from your ticker you're getting married soon - CONGRATS !!!!

Speak soon,

Nix. xxx


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## maisiemoobear (Jan 30, 2007)

Hello ladies

I look at the new messages most nights, but generally never feel able to respond, as i a am still learning all of the abbreviations, but i felt i had to tonight.

I feel exactly the same as you!!!!! It is so hard to keep positive all the time, and i really enjoyed reading that you too do the housework in tears (Oh-that sounds terrible, i didn't mean about you crying i mean that i have found someone who is like me, i cant be going mad on my own!!!). My dh is great about things, but sometimes i just need to scream 'that it is NOT OK, that it is really unfair, and we dont always have to be so bloody polite about the situation!' without him looking at me as if i have become a wicked witch!!!!!!

I have just become an auntie, and for all the happiness i share with my sister, the evil green one inside of me sometimes raises its ugly head when i hear her complain about how stressful it is, when all i want to say is cherish every moment that you have, they just don't get how lucky they are (PS i have not told any family or friends about our problems trying to conceive for 6 years). I gave up with proceeding with IVF due to unexplained infertility, and after suffering an ectopic following clomid, approx 18 months ago, but have just been to the doctors for referral again the the ivf clinic, so awaiting our next appointment, and like you i get very nervous about it all. Normally i talk for England, and ask questions, but i get in the room with the IVF doctors and i just sit there, i cannot believe how little i knew and how few questions we both asked last time. Finding this site has really helped find out about the details and i hope that when we do go again i will understand more about what is going on.

Like you i am not very good with the icons etc on the email, but i am getting better. Look forward to some friendly chats and rants (ha ha) with you both.

Good luck to you both, hope that your dream comes true v soon!  

Love 

M


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

so glad u posted maisiemoobear  

My neice is 4 months old and i love her too bits, but the green eyed monster does get in the way sometimes. I hadnt told anyone about ttc and since posting on here i have told my mum and BF. They were so supportive and my mum is helping me with my diet. I cant believe i was so scared to talk to them. I am really close to my mum and im now glad she knows.

DH & DP can be so supportive but if he is like mine everything always stay positive. which isnt always easy. I have asked to see a counseller and im waiting on an appointment so shall have to see how it goes. I dont want to go the tablet route. i think the talkin to someone other than my DP will do me good as i dont talk too much and i keep things bottled up.

Ive learnt so much from this site and feel so much better prepared ready for my next app in april.

Nix ~ I think its easier for men as i think they dont have to go through waiting for that period not to arrive then when it does your in a bad mood all day. (tho thats not to say all men are like this) I just think sometimes they dont have so much emotional [email protected] to deal with as we do.

Huggles
dakota xx


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## maisiemoobear (Jan 30, 2007)

Thanks Dakota

Can i ask where have you have asked for counselling?

Throughout all of this i have never been offered any sort of help, and like you, i keep everything bottled up, i even feel that it is affecting my work now, as i got married in the summer, and of course now every one keeps asking me 'when is it going to b you?', and the looks if i wear a baggy jumper, they have practically gone and bought the baby clothes!!!!

You have made me think about telling my mum, although i don't want to burst the bubble of her becoming a grandma, but i do wonder if now that she is, the pressure is off me slightly. Just worried as she suffers with depression and i don't want to be the one to make her feel down.

It is so true, that as much as the men try and get involved, it is not the same. My dh has only had to produce a sample twice in all the time we have been going for tests (about 5 years), and even that was hardly unpleasant!!!!! whereare i have had all the needles, tablets, laproscomy etc, thats why it is so lovely to talk on here, i would never show him what i have wrote, he would be heartbroken.

If anyone else reading this has been to see a counsellor, can you let us know if it was any help!

Thanks so much!!!!!!!!  

The mad one!!!

M


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Hey Maisiemoobear  

I went to my GP and told her how i was feeling. These last couple of weeks ive not been too bad but sometimes I'll cry myself to sleep or I'll have a bath and I start crying, basically I was an emotional wreck and any little thing would set me off. I told her how I was feeling and she wanted to give me anti depressents, but i dont want to go that route so she offered me counselling. in my area there is a long waiting list (I've been waiting since beginning of dec for NHS - nothing new new there then lol).

As for telling your mum you have to do whats right for you. It could go both ways, affecting her depression or she could support you like mothers know how   I know its hard and it took me a lot of courage to tell my mum. Its good to hear someone elses opinion aswell as sometimes you get stuck in a rut and your DH keep telling you the same things, and sometimes just talking to her she puts it all into perspective again.
I'll give you an example i didnt feel like we were having sex much these last too months (been on metformin for 2 months) and I didnt know how to approach it with him. so i was keeping quiet. I dicieded to say something along the lines of we arnt doing it enough.( Im always afraid to say something as i dont want to upset him) and basically it didnt improve. so i went to see my mum. and explained how i was feeling and i didnt know what to do. and she said i should go and talk to him as he was probley feeling the pressure too which i understand and she just said i should just keep coming onto him lol i cant believe i had this confersation with my mum. but anyway it worked   we talked and i explained how i felt with tablets and ovulating and the anxieties of seeing cons in april. and we both now know how we feel at the moment. 

Me and DP have ttc for 3 years and he has had one sperm sample done which was all fine. Its not that i dont think he understands so much as to its just easier for the men.

Sorry to ramble let me know how you get on

Higgles 
dakota


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

Hi Maisiemoobear and welcome to FF and hey again Dakota !

It always amazes me on here that there are so many of us thinking the exact same things when for so long it felt like I was going   and was the only person feeling like that!  I hope it helps you as much as it is helping me Maisiemoobear !

I haven't told my mum about any of this and it feels so strange to be going through something so huge without her knowing.  We are very close and speak every day, but I just don't feel able to talk to her about this.  I think part of it is that she will worry about me, but also (selfishly) I don't think I could handle her questioning me about it constantly...almost as if I would feel liked I'd failed a bit more each time she asked - does that make sense ?!  I have spoken to a few friends about it, but have always been very upbeat and positiveve about it when speaking to them, even making most of it sound funny, so none of them really know how upsetting it is or how angry it can make you.  Really only the FF girls understand those feelings I think !

So sorry that you've had such a hard time with tx Maisiemoobear - am sending you lots of   and hugs (still don't know how to do that picture !!).  Feel free to send me a PM if you ever want to chat      I can fill you in on all the other slightly deranged things I do other than hoovering while crying   

Oh and by the way.....TELL ME ABOUT it with the DP's and DH's and their "treatment" !!  A sperm test - not exactly major surgery is it and I bet most of them were MORE than happy about it - if only some of our tx was as much fun  

Take care - sending you lots of   vibes.

Let me know how you're getting on.

Nix. xxxx


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Maisiemoobear ~ I forgot to say before that if you click 'more' under the smiley faces it should show up some extra faces  

Thats for you to aswell Nix lol  

 

huggles
dakota xx


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## Nix76 (Aug 2, 2006)

HOORAAAAAAAAH !!!

Thanks Dakota !!

Nix. x


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## maisiemoobear (Jan 30, 2007)

Hello again!!!

I have been looking on the pages trying to find the 'thread' (oh, I'm getting all technical!!) for days, and have only just worked out how to find the messages that i have been responding to!!

Thank you so much, i really appreciate all of your support. It truly is lovely to be able to be so honest about the whole situation, and have like minded people who understand!!!!!!!!!!!

I am positive that i have ovulated this month (on Thursday) i did the LH test which was positive on Wednesday, and then had pains on my right hand side all Thursday afternoon. So fingers, toes and anything else crossed!!!

Does anybody else get a 'upset tummy' when they ovulate or is it just coincidence?? I have noticed it the past few months?

How are you all getting on? Any further news

Still waiting on hearing from clinic, thought i might give my GP a call next week, as i was hoping to at least have had a letter to say that they are dealing with us etc

I am glad to say that i have been spending a fair bit of time with my new niece, and am really enjoying it, but i will not be telling my sister about my problem as i am sure that she will act differently around me!!!!!! (everyone presumes that if you can have your own children then you must have a hidden agenda to take theirs!!!!)

Thinking of you all ^Reiko^, and feeling very positive today (i am sure it is because we can come and have a chat on here)

May go and have another go on the chat room and then off to the gym(wish me luck)

  ^exercises3^ 

PS Many thanks for the help with the pictures!!!!!!! I could get addicted to these!!!


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Hi Maisiemoobear,

Glad to hear your enjoying spending time with your niece. I spent Thurs morning with mine and i always come away thinking i wish that was me. Ive got next week off and ive asked if i can look after her for a couple of hours which they said of course (i was scared they would say no) so im really looking forward to that.

If there's a special way of looking to see who has responded to your posts let me know lol, I just go in the same threads everyday to see who's about. Im addicted to the word game at the moment lol.

As for ovulating Good luck, and i hope you are. I get so confused as my periods differ every month but only by a couple of days and this month i have to go for my 21 day blood test which i worked out should be 2moro, this is to help see if metformin is working aswell. So fingers crossed it is 2moro otherwise im b*ggered lol. Last month is was timed exactley right by CM. I do get a bit of a dicky tummy when i ovulate but never associated it with ovulating so maybe thats what it is who knows. but then i have had this virus all weekend so my body isnt 100% and i havent been taking my metformin as couldnt keep anything down.

Let me know how you get on with an app.
Huggles and bubbles
dakota xx


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