# IUI With Vaginismus Part 28



## Holly C (Sep 22, 2004)

New home loves

  

H xx


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Hi Everyone!

As seems to be the regular pattern with me at the moment - can't stop long. I shall be told off for logging on before 6pm as it is!

Emma - So sorry I didn't get a chance to come on here before you left. I'm thinking of you today and can't wait to hear from you.

I am being such a bad fertility friend and the mo, but please bear with me. I'll be back home and on my own all day broadband real soon. i've had a quick squizz at everyone elses news so I've got a fair idea what you're all up to. I'm just so sorry I can't linger for a decent chat. It's absolutely unbearable not keeping up to speed with you all.

Anyway - please know that my love, support and best wishes are with each and every one of you right now and please don't give up on me  

Polly - Looking forward to hearing more about the house you've seen

Claire - Hope your home improvements are going well

Donna - How are you and the twinnies  

Deedee - Can't wait to find out if you've got a pink or blue one!

As for me - well not even a hint of baby Ruddle coming any time soon. Looks like I might be going the distance.
Extension is coming on well but I've had a complete nightmare with the architect. Think it might finally be resolved but don't want to be hasty here! Will update you on the whole drama when I can.
Got to dash - DH is home and waiting to drag me round a Sofa superstore - it's not so bad. At least i get to sit down alot there!

Will be back as soon as the house is free again xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning - am probably talking to myself tho! 

Nice to hear from you Annie, sorry baby Ruddle isn't making her move southwards as yet.  

Polly, any developments on the house front

Hope everyone is ok.

Claire x (who's very excited it's Friday again!     )


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hi everyone,

OMG I can't believe I have missed Emma and she is in labour as I type! or maybe its all over now?! Emma I know you wont read this but I am so sorry I haven't been  on this week and I have missed your news.

Annie it wont be long before its your turn!

Polly so you are going ahead with the move then if all the sums add up? what did you decided to do about temping this month?

Can't remember who asked now with the shock of emma's induction but yes I have been being sick! but usually first thing in the mornign which isn't to bad. This weel I was really sick all day monday then haven't been sick since, well I was on wednesday but think I made myself sick as I was worrying that m/s stopping was a sign that I was going to miscarry! I don't feel sick at the moment so hoping that the m/s is over but then I worry that something is wrong with the twins. can't wait for the scan next week!

I am craving food too and lots of it  

Hope you all have nice things planned for the bank holiday weekend?

Claire well done on the spectulum by the way, you clever girl. once you put your mind to something here is no stopping you is there.

Donna xx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello even if I am talking to myself.

Hope everyone is well, I hoped there would be some news from Emma I hope it all went ok for her. Thinking of you Emma xxx

Annie how are you? it wont be to long before its your turn to.

Polly how are you? hows the job going? hows dh?

Deedee I hope you are looking after yourself  

Claire anymore goes with mr spectulum?

Clothes are felling tight and uncomfortable on me so I am living in tracky bottoms, I am only 8 weeks and have a bump think I am going to be the size of a house!
sickness seems to have stopped which I am hoping isn't a bad sign of anything. I seem to be hungry all the time but when I sit down to eat I am full after a few mouthfulls and suffer from what I think is indigestion oh well its all worth it.

Hope you are all enjoying the bank holiday weekend

Donna xx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Hi all,

It's v quiet on here today, I hope u are all well.

Have just been for a swim and feel much better for it. Am now going to have a big clear out as we dont want to transport all our old junk to the new house (both of us are hoarders).

Weather here is poo today- v grey and a bit cold. outlook for tomorrow isnt great either 

I wonder how Emma is? It is quiet without her.

Donna- glad the sickness has stopped, looks like you'll get off lightly. 

Well, Id better start my clear out, first stop is the study. Wish me luck.....

ddxx


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi all

Just to let you know that I've heard from Emma, and baby came on Friday, but is not in good shape. He is in the scbu, which I guess might mean sick children and baby unit? She needs support and prayers.

Back later

Polly


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

No, thought again, must be special care baby unit.

Love
Polly


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Polly, thanks for letting us know.

do you know why he is in scbu? I hope he is ok is Emma doing ok?

My thought are with you Emma and DH xx

Donna xx


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

I really don't know any more details, I'm afraid. I texted them again this morning, but heard nothing yet. As soon as I do, I'll post. The text was: _had baby on Friday sick in scbu pls pray for him emma_.

I'll post if anything else comes through.

Love
Polly


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Ok thanks Polly, I am shocked I thought all was ok with him there were no signs before the birth were there. really upset when I read your post this morning. I txt Emma but it hasn't delivered, not even sure if I have the right number and of course her phone wont even be on but I had to do something.
Emma has been on my mind all day I really hope she is holding up alright this must be awfull for her, I am really willing the lil one to pull through I hope he is ok.

Doesn't feel appropriate to post anything else untill we have more news from Emma.

Donna xx


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi Donna

I know what you mean about not posting anything else until we know more. It won't help to speculate or wonder on here, as we are bound to get it wrong, and this is too serious. I know though that you, like me, will be thinking about them a lot and willing everything to be alright.

Hope you are otherwise ok.

Love
Polly


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Good news from Emma: _Baby much better today, out of scbu tues all being well love to all vag team_

Love
Polly


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Oh thanks fantastic news, he is obviously on the mend then. That is great news to end the day.
Is Emma still in hospital do you know? is she ok apart form being worried about the lil one of course.

Sorry for all the questions polly, I guess you don't know as you would have said.

Thanks for keeping us informed, let her know I am thinking of them all.

Donna xx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

I have just logged on for the first time today and saw the news. Im so glad the little one is doing ok, I cant imagine what Emma and dh were going through...
Lets hope they get to bring him home soon and she can tell us all how gorgeous he is.

Emma, Im thinking of the three of you 

dd


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning everyone

Oh my, I tried to log on a few days ago to see if there was any Emma news (flipping internet wouldn't work), my heart sank at the first posts, thank goodness it all seems to be on the up.

Thanks Polly. 

Claire x


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Hi Everyone

Just snuck across the road because I couldn't bare being apart from you any longer and nearly threw up when I saw the first few posts about Emma. I hope she and her little man are doing much better. I'm moving over here on Thursday for the night so I shall log on when everyone has left for work and hope to see a post from Emma telling us all is well.

Claire - sorry - think I must have missed a post from you somewhere. Have you had success with the speculum!?!

Donna - Don't worry about the morning sickness going. It often comes in waves! Keep eating, sleeping and taking it easy. I'm still in shock! 

Deedee - How is the packing going for the house move. What day do you go?

Polly - Thanks for keeping us all updated about Emma & Master Daff. What's the latest with all your adventures? - house move, E-Bay etc? ooh and how are DN and The Boy doing these days?!?

Nothing new with me I'm afraid. Still looking on track for going all the way to due date. Not even a twinge as yet.
Sacked my architect last Thursday and told him to whistle for any more money he thinks he is owed. Told him I would hold him personally responsible if I went into labour early or the health of my child was compromised because of the stress he has caused me - funnily enough I've not had an invoice!
Extension gets cracking again on Thursday so next week I might be able to see progress again. Looking good so far.

righto - I'll be back on Thursday. Much love and best wishes to Emma, DH & Master Daff. Wishing you all a speedy recovery and the joy of coming home!

Love Annie x


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi

Emma, don't know if you're at home or not, but hope all is well and Master Daffodil is out of scbu.

Annie, yes I did have some speculum success.  Managed to get it in, out and shake it all about.  What I was surprised about was it didn't really hurt so I'm wondering if the dilators and s with bf have been a greater help than I anticipated.  I'm still worried about the nurse doing it though.

Donna, glad the morning sickness has receded.  Hope you're feeling ok still.

Deedee, good luck with the packing.

Polly, how's the house hunting going?  Ours is still going slowly despite narrowing down the search we can't seem to find something that's right for us in the right location at the right price!  Ah well, lots of poking around people's houses.  

Doing well doing up bf's house, I have now taken complete control and am moving things along swiftly.  Men, honestly.    Anyway, not going to chatter on as I need to go home and get dinner on and start looking for bathroom accessories in the Argos and Ikea catalogues.

x


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hi everyone,

Emma I hope you and the lil one are doing ok and that he is out of scbu, we are all awaiting your safe return home with the little man. thoughts still with you and DH

Donna xx

p.s spoke to soon morning sickness back with evengence today


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi,

message from Emma: _Baby much better and out of scbu. Mystery virus. Called will. Seven lb seven ounces. I'm ok. Lots of stitches._

So thankful!

Oh - loads of questions - sorry will get back. I'm SO tired from being back at work AND doing my ebay stuff. So later, eh?

Claire, well done on speculum. You will be fine with the nurse - just let her know that you are nervous so that she takes her time.

Annie - wow! sacking your architect! Did you say all of that in an incandescent fury, or with the menace of cold steel?  Enquiring minds want to know! Will you have to get another one now, or have you learnt everything you need to know?

Anyway, I'm off. Goodness knows how I will stay awake for two episodes of LOST this evening!

Speak soon

Love
Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi everyone

Emma, hope you're back home now.  

Annie, good for you re sacking the architect.  

Polly, I think I will tell the nurse I'm worried, yes.  Hopefully as you say she'll be a little slower with the process and I'll have time to think through my relaxation... 

Donna, Deedee, hope you're both ok.  Sorry your morning sickness is back with a vengeance Donna!

Claire x


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Hi everyone,

Emma- hope you are back home and with us soon. Thinking of you 

Annie- It's very quiet here without you 

Donna- Im sorry the m/s is back. Have you tried any remedies? When is your next scan?

Polly- Im a LOST fan too. I watch it on RTE (Irish channel) and they are miles ahead so I dont want to give anything away. I think it's the best show on TV and not just because Matthew Fox is in it!!!

Claire- Have you decided what you are going to treat yourself to after the smear?

DD xx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Hi Deedee.  Yes, we're going down to the south coast immediately after (appointment is 9.05am) to spend the day at Lyme Regis, Charmouth, etc. and then stay in a B&B over night.  I'm going to try and focus on that while the 'action' is going on.

Hope everyone else is ok, and you all have lovely weekends!

Claire x


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Morning Everyone!

Emma - So relieved to hear that Will is out of SCBU. Fabulous name choice by the way. I bet he's as beautiful as he sounds! Can't wait to hear from you

Polly - The architect sacking was embarassingly done with a mix of tears, hysteria and absolute menace. I just absolutely tipped when he asked about money. Final straw!
You sound like you're incredibly busy right now! Don't overdo it!

Donna - Sorry the M/S is back. Go back to eating little and often again. Try out the biscuits and ready salted crisps. Not much longer with it now! Have you got another scan again soon?

Deedee - Another Lost fan here too. We watched the first two episodes a couple of days ago - good stuff! 
How are things with you?

Claire - Well Done you with the speculum. It totally doesn't surprise me to hear this. I knew you were a tough cookie. I'm so pleased for you! I'm sure the Nurse will be really gentle with you once you explain your nerves. I found my Nurse to be more gentle that I was on myself  
Is it today your appointment? Oooh, sorry if it is. I wanted to wish you Good Luck!

Well - We had a bit of a scare yesterday. Baby hadn't been moving much at all since the day before and I decided enough was enough and I'd best get it checked. I spent 3 hours at the hospital yesterday. They hooked me up to a monitor and baby was soooo quiet for a good half an hour. They then got me to sit up a bit and drink some cold water and that seemed to get it going, but only ever so slightly. The Madwives then called in a Dr to take a look and he wasn't happy with it either so he went and got a Consultant! By this point I was beside myself with fear! The Consultant decided to scan me in the end and spent an hour checking absolutely everything - blood through the umbilical cord, heart, amniotic fluid, size of baby and all sorts. He was then satisfied that everything is as it should be. I've got to relax and keep an eye on my movements. If things don't perk up in the next day or two then they want me to go back. She's been a fair bit more active this morning though - phew! That was such a scary experience yesterday. 

DH has just buggered off to play golf for a few hours so for the first time since I left work I am going to simply sit down and watch some trashy daytime t.v.

wishing you all a glorious weekend in the sunshine - if it lasts!

Will check in next week - if baby doesn't make an apperance!


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Just heard that Emma & baby came home yesterday evening! I expect pictures will be available soon....(waits impatiently..)

Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

It's busy on here today!

Annie, you haven't missed it, the test is next Friday.  I wish it had been today though as it'd be over!  Once I'm through this I'm more adamant than ever that I want to get on with ttc asap.  I've told bf that I want a ring and I want it asap, and it turns out that he was just worried about spending out on it after he realised that he needed to save quite hard for his share of the house purchase fees.

Glad your 'scare' turned out just fine.  

Polly, how's things with your ebay business and your house purchase?  

Deedee, how are you feeling now?

Donna, hope you're feeling ok and not too sick.

What great news that Emma and Will are home now!  

I'm having a house decorating weekend.  Waiting for quotes on the new bathroom and kitchen fitting which are due any day, ordered some cheap Argos furniture to 'stage' his house (honestly, how some men can be blind to their surroundings, I don't know!  ) and we're painting the living room and stripping wallpaper from the hall.  Also hoping to order some cheap carpet at about £5/metre.  I don't think bf knows what's hit him.  

Claire x


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

Well its time I said, Congratulations Emma and DH on the birth of Will    so glad your home and everything is ok, can't wait to see pictures and of course hear all about the birth when you feel up to it.

Claire, does this mean that bf will be buying a ring now then?

Annie look after yourself glad the scare settled down, although you are impatient and want her out don't you but obviously not in those circumstances.

Polly how are you? thanks for keeping us updated on Emma and Wills progress.

I had another scan yesterday and boy had they grown! could see heads and arms it was fantastic! can't wait for 12 week scan now!if I ever manage to get a docs appointment so I can be booked in  
going on the measurements this time I am a few more days on than I thought so instead of being 9 wks I am 9 wks and 3 days changing due date to the 5th of december. I 'll get definate dates at 12wk scan though.

Hope you all have a nice weekend

Donna xx


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi

Just had to drag us back from the second page. Obviously been a busy weekend for us all - I was gardening and sewing....

Love
Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hello everyone.

Monday again.    

Emma, hope you're enjoying your time at home with Will.  

Annie, any stirrings?  

Polly, thanks for pulling us back from page 2!  I spent my weekend painting and decorating mostly!

Donna, how very exciting for you.  Only a few weeks until that 12 week scan too, it's flying by!  I assume that means I will eventually get a ring although I'm still waiting for him to get down on one knee!  

Deedee,  

I used the speculum again last night in preparation and again it went ok.  Does anyone know if they use lubricant, or if they can't as it affects the results?  I've been testing it with lubricant and am getting worried that they'll do it 'dry' (sorry  ) and I've not been practising that.

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

I'm back! Thank you so much for all your kind wishes over the pst week or so. I missed you all so much. I haven't had chance to catch up with everyone's news yet, but will do soon.

Baby Will was born early on Friday 28th after a 5.5 hour labour (ouch). He seemed fine at first, but a bit quiet. A few hours later he developed horrible red blotches and spots, a swollen foot, and was was too lethargic. He was rushed away to a special care isolation room where we weren't allowed to touch him.  The medics were fantastic but had no idea at all what was wrong. The rash cleared up overnight, but the lethargy was worse. We were allowed to hold him briefly but wearing gloves etc. At one point when dh was holding him he went blue. I have never been so scared in my life. thankfully the nurse stayed calm and revived him. Doctors ran lots of tests, all of which came back negative, although we're still waiting for one and he is medication. By Tuesday he was magically much better and allowed onto a normal ward with me. I can't tell you how awful it had been to have a baby and not be allowed anywhere near him, having to watch all these other parents with their perfect healthy babies.

We were allowed home on Thurs eve, and he seems just fine now. He is eating fine, and is able to cry quite well now! I am so, so tired. He wakes every 2 hours at night for feeding, but perhaps that will ease off.

As for me, I had a fever after labour but that cleared up with 24 hours, and had lots of stiches for a vaginal tear. I'm still a bit sore, but it is quite bearable.

Better go now, but hopefully be back soon. 
Love to you all,
Emma, xxxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Emma it is so good to have you back with us.   
That is such a lovely name you have chosen.

I just cant begin to imagine what you were both going through after the birth....
Im sure you are glad to be back home with baby Will where he belongs. You must be sooo tired, just try to get as many ZZzzzz as possible.
It is hard to believe that the baby has actually arrived after all this time (and I only joined in half way through!)
I cant wait to hear more about him and how you are finding the first few weeks of motherhood. I'll be needing some pointers soon myself!
Take care of yourself and give us some more news when you are up to it. luv dd xx

Claire, Im CERTAIN that they will use lube- that would be cruel if they didnt (doesnt bear thinking about!)so dont worry about that. My friend used to tell me she would go for a couple of drinks before her smear test to 'relax' her. You could always give that a try.... 

Im off to watch LOST. It's getting really exciting at the minute.

My 20 week scan is in 2 weeks and I cant wait. I think I can feel movements but it is very light (probably wind!)

bye for now
dd xx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi

Emma it's so good to hear from you and to hear about Will.      I am particularly fond of the name Henry myself, it's a definite contender if I have a son.  Glad you're both doing well, look forward to hearing more about it (and seeing photos if you're planning to post any!).

Deedee, well we can hope re the lube but I have a sinking feeling that they won't use it as I'm sure I read somewhere that you can't use lubricant 24 hours before the test as it interferes with the sample so maybe it can't be used during the test either.    To be honest that is freaking me out no end.  I even had a nightmare about the blasted test last night, it was a bit warped and unrealistic but still unpleasant in the extreme.  I'm going to try searching the net in a bit and see what I can find out.

Anyway, lots of work to do.  

Claire x


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

Claire don't worry about the lube I am not sure if they use it or not but you seem to be getting on fine with the spectulum yourself, I know you are using lube but they do day in day out and are at a better angle than you are so I am sure it wont be any different to you doing it. try not to worry.
When I had IUI they couldn't use lube icase it effected the sperm and I was terrified but it really want that bad. your be fine hun.

Emma glad your back home safe and sound, nice to hear form you. Is DH off work for a while? can't wait to hear more form you.

Its so quiet on here with no Emma or Annie.

Annie how are you? any twinges.

Deedee how exciting your scan is so soon, are you going to find out what sex your having? I can't remeber what you said. my friend described the first movments of her baby as being similar to wind!

Polly how are things with you? your very quiet at the moment all ok? did you decided to buy the house?

I am still being sick every morning but its only once so I guess I can cope with it, it could be worse after all. I feel sick throughout the day but so far I haven't been sick and I am still eating like a horse although am starting to suffer from indigestion but hay its all good course.
I have finally got a GP appoinment for today at 4pm yippee I can be booked in! not sure if the GP will belive I am having twins! 

I'll check back later
Take care

Donna xx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello again,

All ok at the doctors, I am seeing the midwife next week on friday. Will have to swap my half day at work which impress the unsupportive manager no end 
Been told teh appoitment can last up to an hour! what do they do?

Donna xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Donna - sorry you are feeling sick, but it is all in a good cause. Perhaps it will stop soon. The booking-in appointmen really does take an hopur, or more. They fill in a lot of forms and ask lots of silly questions, most of which you'll say 'no' to (have you had variopus diseaes etc).

Claire - I'm sure that they did use lube when I had my smear, but even if they didn't you'll be just fine.

Deedee - i can't believe you are at 18 weeks already. So exciting!

Polly - I hope all is going well with house-hunting, ebay, and your new job.Goodness, you have a lot on your plate at the moment.

Annie - how are you and baby Ruddle?

I've had a touch of baby blues today (and then I feel really guilty because I'm so glad the baby is here with us). I got no sleep at all last night, so I think it is sheer exhasution. Managed a few hours in the day though. Donna - I need your advice on getting babies to sleep. Will just wants to feed all night long. We did have a successful trip to Waitrose though, and got to use those fabulous extra wide car-parking spaces. Dh is back at work tomorrow - a bit scary for me, but I'm sure I'll be fine.

Got to go, take care everyone,
Emma, xxxxxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Thanks for your help and support everyone.  I did ascertain yesterday on the internet that they don't use lube because it can interfere with the results.  As you can imagine, my heart sank at that.  Last night I tried it again (after several glasses of wine) without the lube and while it was 'ok' it was nowhere near as successful as with.  I'm starting to panic now as I don't have much time to practise left, well only tonight really and maybe tomorrow morning before work.  And I don't think I can turn up drunk at 9.05am either! (especially with a long journey to Devon afterwards!).

Emma, I'm sure baby blues are perfectly natural particularly with no sleep.  I can't survive on less than 8 hours a night personally without turning into a monster!  

Donna, how exciting re the scan.  Can't believe you're so far along already.  

Deedee, can't believe your 20 week scan is just around the corner!

Annie, how are you and baby Ruddle doing?  Any more building news??

Polly, any house news?  How's the ebay enterprise?  I have 4 things listed this week, I just love the excitement of logging in to see how I'm doing so with an ongoing thing like yours it must be great!

Claire x


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Hellooo Everybody! Boy have I been missing you guys!

Claire - I had to get to you first and tell you that I was allowed to have lube when I had my smear. Nurse didn't say a word when I asked if I could use some and certainly didn't say it would interfere with my results. So try not to worry as if they could find a friendly lube at my nasty surgery I'm sure they can do the same for you. Perhaps you could give the surgery a call before you go and if they don't have any ask if you can get some to take along that would be acceptable?

Emma - Our wonderful Emma is back with us and it's great to be hearing from you again. I'm impressed you found five minutes to log on! Many congratulations again. What a distressing time you had at the hospital, but sounds like he is entirely worth it! So, who does he look like?!? Can you believe he's here?!?
5 and a half hour labour - I won't say no to that!  I have a feeling mine is going to go on for days  

Donna - Absolutely fantastic news about your scan! That's great to hear that the twins are growing really well. Can't wait for your next one! you sound like you're doing really well, apart from the sickness of course. Nearly through the sicky part though my lovely and then you can transend gracefully into the blooming stage. Enjoy that part because at this point it's just blooming awful  

Deedee - I am beside myself waiting to hear if you're joining me in the pink camp or Emma in the blue! 
You probably are feeling movements. I didn't believe it at first. The best description I found of them was " a giant butterfly in my tummy trying to get out"

Polly - Sounds like you're really busy again right now! Sorry if you've explained already but did you go for that house in the end?

ME! - Absolutely nothing to report on the baby front. No twinges, no niggles, no signs of anything. So I sit and I wait. Well, O.K you know me better than that. I clean and go out all day! 
I saw my Madwife on Monday and told her I was unhappy with baby keep having these quiet days as they're really distressing and she was as helpful as a chocolate teapot. Basically I have to keep referring myself to the hospital for monitoring if she's not letting her presence be known and we keep going to next Thursday if they can't see any problems. Darn them. I wanted to be taken in! 

The house is making some good progress now the bloody steel beams are in. Electrician is making a start today and plumber on Friday. Bathroom is being delivered on Tuesday -so it's all starting to come together.

Well, that's me for now. Such a tonic to talk to you all. I'll be back as soon as I can again. Polly has kindly agreed to keep you all informed if anything does happen - I wish!

Bye for now my lovely ladies xxxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

Annie - lovely to hear from you again. Wow, your extension is coming on so quickly. I'm so glad baby ruddle is ok; there's probably not much room for her to move around now. Have they said if she is engaged yet?

Claire - maybe it is best to step away from the speculum now. You will be fine.  

I am losing the polot today, with only 3 hours sleep again last night and next to none today. He just wants to feed all the time. The house is an absolute tip too, with boxes and chaos everywhere. I can't imagine ever being on top of things again. People keep phoning to see how I am, and i've burst into tears on all of them. i'm so angry with myself for not coping and for not being grateful for having this beautiful little boy. sorry to moan, yet again.......

Hope you are all ok. love, Emma, xxxxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

I'm in a right state.  I decided to try the speculum for the last time this morning for reassurance purposes and boy did that back fire.  It went in fine, opened fine, but hurt coming out and there was a huge glob of blood on the end.  Naturally I burst into tears and bf was late for work (as was I) which I decided that the world had ended.  I really don't know what to do now.  I don't know if it's because I did some damage, or if my problem from a long while ago has returned, or if it was breakthrough bleeding from changing to a triphasic pill 2 weeks ago as there is a high incidence of that if you change to it or take two triphasic packs back to back (according to panicked searches of the internet this morning, I have done no work).  I don't know if I can even have the test as I don't know if the bleeding has gone or there is some damage that can be reawakened tomorrow or what, and it it will hurt like hell tomorrow now.  Or if it is breakthrough bleeding (and was that it or is there more) will it make the test impossible as the blood will mask the cells they look at, which I believe is why you can't have the test during a period.  I honestly don't know what to think or do.  I can't ring the surgery as I'm surrounded by people and have a workshop over lunch time.  And the nurse I'm seeing I was under the impression doesn't do these tests daily so probably wont know what to say to me either.

Sorry it's all about me, I can't think straight at the moment.


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Oh Claire, you poor thing.  I'd be in a right old state too if it was me. Could you phone the surgery after work and perhaps speak to a doctor - they tend to stay quite late in the day - and ask their advice? I would go tomorrow anyway and just explain to the nurse what has happened. The chances are that she may have come across something like this before. You could post something on 'ask a nurse' here; I've had fantastic advice from people there before now. 
Just a thought, is there a phone no on the pill packet that you could call for advice?

I wish I could do more to help......

Emma, xxxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi Emma

I didn't go to the workshop because I keep bursting into tears and didn't want to show myself up infront of colleagues.

I don't think it's the pill thing as there hasn't been any more and it all seems a bit of a coincidence.  

I rang the surgery and they said I could see the nurse at 5.30 but it's the same one I'm seeing tomorrow so there seemed no point going today.  

I just feel so crap.  I thought I was doing so well and all I had to worry about was the exam tomorrow and it's all seems so unfair, now I have all this and tomorrow seems a 100 times worse.


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hi Claire - if there hasn't been any more blood, then perhaps it is a one off and won't affect the smear at all. Of course you'd still want to know why i happened. Whatever you do, don't try the speculum again tonight - you need to step away. Am I right in thinking that the smear is first thing? Not much consolation I know, but at least it will soon be over with. 
Even if there is more blood, and it does make the test results inconclusive, you can treat tomorrow's test as a practice and it shouldn't seem so bad if they make you go back for another one in a few weeks time. 

Sorry, I'm not being helpful at all. Make sure bf gives you lots of   tonight.

If I'm not back before than, I wish you lots and lots of luck. I'll be routing for you.

Emma, xxxxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

I'd better talk to myself to stop us falling off page 1. 

Claire - hope yesterday went ok, and you are now enjoying the post-smear treat.

Annie - anything happening? I'm getting very excited for you.  Have as much sleep as you can now.

Polly - how are all your ventures going?

Donna, Deedee - hope you are both ok.

After a very bad day yesterday, when I couldn't stop   due to no sleep at all, I got 4 hours last night (in 1 hour segments) and feel a bit more human. MIL is staying this weekend and is full of advice 
Have a lovely weekend,
Emma, xxxxx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

Sorry I have been feeling pretty bad this week so haven't managed to turn the computer on! but feel a lot better today, maybe because I am not at work   its is a struggle.

Claire, a bit late now but I hope the smear test went well.

Annie, sorry you are getting impatient your be in labour in no time, glad to hear Polly will be keeping us updated again - what would we do with out her!

Polly how are you? have you or DH made an more prgress re the BIG decision? hows house hunting?

Deedee how are you?

Emma please please stop beating yourself up   you have a 2week old baby and have not yet recovered from the birth! I am sure you are still in pain from your stiches too? so the house work can wait, no one is going to care about an untidy house, sorry if that sounds a bit harsh but you and Will are the most important things anything else can be put on hold. I hope MIL is a support this weekend.
As for sleeping you will hopefully find that things settle down in a week or 2 easy for me to say I know! it is very hard to get a baby into any routine untill about 3 months old as they can't tell the difference betwwen day and night.
You may do these things already but you could try
1) starting a very basic bed time routine (although it is a little eary it may help you feel more relaxed) Bath Will at night as this often tires babies out to.

2) makes his day sleeping place different from the night time one, to start introducing that nigth time is different.

3) Make sure you sleep during the day when he does, unpulg the phone so your not disturbed and get some needed rest - LEAVE THE HOUSEWORK 

Hope that helps! what you are feeling and going through is natural and it doesn't mean you are not happy that Will is here we all know you are but the first few weeks are a struggle expecially after what you have been through. Dont be hard on yourself and get help form family and friends.
Ypu have done very well to be logging on here and manage a trip to the shops, your doing well 

Donna xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Thanks Donna, your post makes me feel 100 times better. xxxx
I've managed to log on because I realised that I could combine it with breastfeeding.  
I'm interested in you saying have a different day and nighttime sleeping place. We started that today as someone has lent us a bouncy chair. He has slept nearly all day in that, and out and about in his pushchair - don't know if that means he will be awake all night? My worry was that he would hate his cot even more if he didn't get used to it in the day?

People keep telling me to sleep in the day, but every time I attempt it someone calls round or the phone rings. It is impossible! Perhaps next week when the midwife stops coming (i have the last visit tomorrow).

I've had a lovely day today though - shopping with dh in the morning and a (very short) dog walk this afternoon. It feels more like having a normal life back again, rather than being an invalid confined to hospital/the house.

I don't know how you manage work whlist pg with twins. Aren't you on your feet all day and doing lots of lifting of babies? I hope you're taking things easy at the weekend.

Got to go, he is waking up.

Emma, xxxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Emma- sorry that you are having a hard time . Sorry I cant give any advice as Im new to all this aswell. I hope you get into a routine soon. Donna's advice sounds good though!!

Donna- good to hear from you but sorry you've been feeling bad again. Going to work makes it 10 times worse doesn't it? All I wanted to do was stay at home in my pj's and feel sorry for myself! Do you have a little bump yet??

Annie- Have been thinking about you  Cant wait to hear some news!!!

Claire- Hope you are enjoying your 'treat', you deserve it!

Polly- Hi! 

Well, we have ordered our pram already. We started to have a look around and to be honest it is very confusing with so many different models and accessories (as well as prices!). My main concern was 'will it fit into the boot of my VW beetle?' so that limited our choice a lot. We got one in the end, mind you I have to take the wheels off to get it into the car!! so have ordered it and can now forget about it until October.

Less than 4 weeks until we move house. We had a look at it on Friday and are getting worried it won't be ready in time and we'll have to stay at my M&D's for a while...aaarrggghh!!!

luv dd xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Hope you are all having a lovely weekend. I had a bit more sleep last night, and was feeling fabulous this morning, but I'm exhausted again now.  It was hard work entertaining MIL, for one thing, but she has gone now. I'm a bit daunted at the prospect of a whole week to myself (although dh is only at work, not away), but we'll take each day as it comes.

Deedee - do you have a 20 week scan this week? What needs to be done to your new house? Well done on the pram - very organised; we only got ours in the nick of time.

Annie - I want news. 

Got to go, W is stirring for his hourly feed 
Emma, xxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hello

Just quickly popped on, supposed to be preparing for a meeting.  

Went along on Friday as planned, although I was nearly sick in the run up to it.  I didn't sleep well either according to my ever-suffering bf.  Anyway, thankfully the nurse was really nice, at first I thought she was going to be a dragon!  I gave her a potted history of the last week or so, and my concerns re the speculum and she was really nice about it, patted my knee and said we'd get the test done somehow and not to worry.  I asked for the smallest one but it was too small apparently so ended up with a bigger one.  Anyway, in a nutshell, it was fine, it felt uncomfortable but I wouldn't have said it actually hurt as such.  I must have done some damage with the speculum on Thurs she said, but nothing lasting as it all looked fine.  Just need to wait for the results now.  After my paranoia the day before and all the anxiety I went through, I can't describe the relief I felt afterwards.  We set off straight for Devon, stopping at Stonehenge on the way, and had a lovely day in the sunny weather sitting on the beach.  Had a nice meal in a local pub that night, lovely B&B, then the next day travelled along the coast to Charmouth, Lyme Regis and eventually Bournemouth.  

Emma, hope you're feeling more rested now and putting into practice Donna's excellent advice.  Unfortunately I don't know much about babies so can't say anything remotely useful!  Except don't be hard on yourself!

Hi Polly, hope the house hunting / buying is going well.

Donna, wow can't believe how far along you are.  Hope you're feeling ok today?

Deedee, is the house being built new or being renovated?  Sorry this is probably covered somewhere and I'm being dim!

Annie, any news?!

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - well done, you! I am so relieved and pleased for you. I knew you'd get through it somehow. I bet you were on   afterwards. I'm glad you gad a lovely weekend afterwards too - very much deserved.

Very little sleep last night for me.  I've got a health visitor coming round this afternoon so I'll be grilling her for any tips she can provide. I love him to bits, but wish he came with a manual.

Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Emma, hope the health visitor can give you some good tips!

x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - I love your new avatar.

HV was lovely and full of good tips. They all make perfect sense when she is sitting there (lots of stuiff about the position for breastfeeding afecting the quality of the feed etc) but only time will tell how it works in practice. It is nice to know that i can call her for advice if i need it.

Hope everyone else is OK.

Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Glad it went well with the HV!

Thanks re the avatar, I decided I couldn't be a drunk smilie forever!  I also decided it was time I upgraded bf to DP, sounds more grown up!  

Hope you have a good evening.  I'm going to attempt to make two cushion covers from old clothes for the sofa in DP's house to cover up nasty stains for when we sell it...  

x


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hey, you know I'm the cushion queen, if you need any advice, just holler!

Polly


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Claire- WELL DONE YOU!!!!! Im so glad it went OK on Friday. Your weekend must have been fab after all that worry. Next time won't be so bad and it will just get easier and easier. Its never an enjoyable experience and Im sure that you could settle for 'uncomfortable'.

Emma- 20 week scan is next Monday and Im so excited (nervous aswell). I wish i had some useful advice to give you that would help but Im a novice too. All i know (from what Ive been told) is that after a few weeks you find your own routine and things get easier. He certainly sounds like a hungry little man.  Are you breastfeeding? How are u finding it?
Does Will look like you or DH ? (its probably too early to say)

DD xx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Polly, cushion covers!  Well, I'm not the world's greatest seamstress so I basically cut out a rough shape, pinned it in place around the cushion pad (turned the ends so that neither edge was visible) and sewed!  No poppers or buttons, once the house is sold I'm going to take the covers off and put some nice proper ones on to match the new decor!  But if you have any advice on a better way to do it, I'm all ears.  I've done two so far, one from an old jumper and one in blue check from an old dress.  They look 'ok', second one definitely is an improvement on the first!

Deedee, thanks for the congrats, I still can't believe it's over.  Now just praying I'm not in the 10% who have to have it done again, but even if I do it won't be anywhere near as bad as the run up to Friday.    How exciting that your 20 week scan is so close!

Emma, how did it go with the HV?

Donna, Annie,   

Well DP has been given his promotion on a 3 month trial so things are looking up for us.  Means he'll be working longer hours to make sure it's made permanent so all the more household chores for me!    It means the house development will be a bit slower to progress but I suppose it is worth it.

x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Morning all,

Claire - well done to dp on his promotion. Does that mean he can propose to you now?  I bet the house stuff will move faster now you are in charge.
Cushiosn sound lovely. I think it is nice to make them from old fabric that has some sentimental attachment, although I've never got round to it myself. Is his house on the market yet? Did you finally get the kitchen (or was it the bathroom) sorted out?

Deedee - how exciting about your scan. I can't wait.

Polly - how are things? Have you put your house on the market or put in an offer on the lovely house? How is the job?

Annie, Donna - hope you are both OK.

I managed 6 hours sleep last night (4+2 hours) - bliss! I actually took him out in the car at midnight because he wouldn't settle and that did the trick. 
Deedee - I am breastfeeding (and now have _huge_ boobs). I don't think he looks like either of us at all, but it is early days. In truth I think all newborn babies look pretty similar.

I am going to attempt some unpacking today, at long last, and se if i have any clothes that fit.

Bye for now,
Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Emma,

Glad your amount of sleep is increasing!  The only way I'm going to get nice big boobs is from pg, kind of an incentive in itself !

The kitchen and bathroom are being fitted at the end of May.  The Argos cheap furniture I ordered is coming in the next few weeks and I'm trying to sell the old stuff for next to nothing to get it out of the house.  Living room has been painted, but still got to do the hall/stairs and the main bedroom (and the kitchen bathroom painting, tiles and floors once they're in).  Still need to order carpets though.  So I reckon it's a few more months yet as we're only going to do stuff at the weekends now that dp is being promoted as he gets really tired and stressed after work.  And I'm off to Barcelona in 4 weeks which will take up a weekend as even when I get back it's fathers day and my dad's birthday!

He did mention engagement last night, I hope he doesn't think I'm waiting 3 months for his post to be made permanent!   Unfortunately the phone rang at an inopportune time and that was the end of the conversation.    Even my brother is asking when he'll be an uncle and getting impatient!

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Morning all (or, at least, Claire - everyone else has vanished ),

Hope you are all OK. I wonder how things are with Annie. Isn't she due today or tomorrow.

Claire - sounds like you're going great guns with the house. My top tip (for what it is worth) for stuff you can't sell but want to get rid of is Freecycle (a website where people offer stuff they don't want rather than take it to a dump). People will find a use for just about anything, and they collect it from you. I got rid of lots of stuff that way when we moved house. Things get snapped up within minutes!

What a shame about the phone ringing during that all important conversation......

No excitements with me. I got a bit of sleep, but would have liked more. perhaps when he is a teenager I can catch up. I've got to wait in for a midwife this morning (hope its not the 'wet' one who did my antenatal classes).

Bye for now,
Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Afternoon!

Bit of a busy morning for me, 3 meetings.  

The freecycle website sounds good!  I've had no interest whatsoever in the rather hideous mahogany-effect cabinet and tv unit (no surprise there then  ) and I'd rather get rid of it for free than have to chop it up and take it to the tip!

Hope it went well with the midwife and it wasn't the one from before!!

Yes I think Annie is due any day, I wonder how she's getting on... 

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - hope your meetings went well. Are they still working you too hard?

It was the same midwife, but I've been discharged into the community now so that is that.

I just went to ToysRus in Luton - what a hideous place. Iwanted to buy a cot mobile (in the hope it would magically send Will to sleep) but their limited selection was just awful. So much plastic tat in one place..... At least the car journey sent him to sleep.

Annie - we want news......


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS
           

I think you've got the message! Hannah Rose Ruddle was born 4.32 weighing 7lb 7oz. Rough labour (contractions started 3 am yesterday) but both are fine.

Sorry I'm a bit late posting, only just got to a computer, been dying to tell you since 7.30 this morning!

       

Love Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

OMG that's soooo exciting!  Congratulations Annie for when you read this!  Brilliant name too!

            

Claire x


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Omigod thats fantastic news, thanks Polly!      

Annie cant wait to hear all about it!!!!! Glad you are both doing OK.

DD xxxxxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Congratulations Annie and dh on the birth of Hannah Rose.            

What wonderful news! Hope they are all OK.

Polly - please pass on my love and best wishes if you can.

I hope we get all the details soon.


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi

No more news from Annie, I texted her back with all your congrats. 

I'm sorry I'm not really keeping up with stuff, I still feel it a bit difficult to post. But anyway, we put an offer in for the house we wanted, but were pipped to the post. So that is that. As part of the problem was that we hadn't put ours on the market: I don't know how you manage to sell and buy a house without making yourself homeless in the process! So we'll keep our eyes open and maybe another one will come up.

, Emma, at being discharged into the community!

Claire , drat that phone! Has he mentioned it again?

Deedee, Donna: Hi

Love 
Polly


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

Polly - so sorry about the house.  I do think that the only way to buy and sell a house is to end up homeless (like me) but I wouldn't recommend it, certainly not for 5 months. You need to sell to a 1st time buyer and buy a house with vacant possession to have even a chance of things working out timewise.
Sorry you haven't felt like posting. You don't have to talk about the 'big' question (unless you want to, of course). I for one would love to hear about something that is nothing to do with babies. I am sorry if I've whittered on about baby thing s and that has upset you. 
How is the job going?

Hope everyone else is Ok. 

Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Polly, sorry about the house  .  I'm also worried about the timescales, as we don't want to put our houses on the market until we've found something as our size of house are still selling in record time and we'd end up homeless.  I also don't find the idea of being in a long chain particularly appealing.  I'm hoping for first time buyers for our houses which is quite likely but there will probably be an upward chain...    

I've been in a deliriously long meeting until about 10 minutes ago, hence the delay in posting today.

Emma, I think the baby talk has got to me! (in the nicest possible way)  Perhaps it was the Annie news that helped it along.  Last night I had a dream that I had twins but they were so premature that I hadn't even posted on here that I was pg and I had to tell you all that I'd given birth!  It was very unrealistic, the babies were the size of mobile phones as they were born so early, but the hospital said they'd grow just fine (!), and I put them on the arm of my chair lined up with my mobile.  Very bizarre!  

Did I mention I threw the dilators out and the speculum?  When we got back from Devon I decided I didn't want them in the house and on an impulse chucked them away.  Hope I don't need them again!  

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

Claire - what a funny dream. We can see what's on your mind. 
Good for you chucking out the dilators and speculum. You clearly don't need them any more. Incidentally, I unpacked mine again yesterday (in their lovely silver box). I'm too scared to throw them out in case I'll need them again. I like the reassurance of knowing that they are there if necessary, but wish I was as brave as you.

I've just managed to walk the dogs (with the baby), albeit not very far. I feel much better for it too, if a bit tired. I've got to get back into my jeans somehow. I can fit into 2 pairs of pre-pg cropped trousers, but they were quite baggy to begin with. I can't stand wearing maternity jeans any longer.

Bye for now,
Emma, xxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Yes, talk about a one-track mind at the moment  .  I'm so desperate for my own little one!  I need to increase the s I think so I've had plenty of practise ready for ttc.  I'd been putting it off due to the speculum practice and worries.  

Well done for getting out with Will for the dog walking!  

Claire x


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

News from Annie - she suffered a nasty tear and so they will be in hospital untiln Saturday. She also says that she is not really relaxing enough to sleep. Hannah is fine. 

Claire - funny dream. It made me think that it is a long time since I had a "baby" dream. In one way a relief, as I don't get that sense of loss when I wake up, but I wonder if it is related to getting too old. Wow! throwing away the speculum and dilators! As no question is TOO nosey for the vag team, are you having lots of s? 

Interesting comments about the house - as we only have one bedroom, we are likely to sell to a first time buyer, so that's good, but most vacant properties that we have looked at have clearly been lived in by older people, and so need a fair amount of work. Like stripping off loads of woodchip wallpaper covered in gloss   paint - or at least it looks like gloss.

About me - I'm not upset about anyone talking about their baby/baby making, but it is upsetting that it's not me anymore - if you see what I mean. It is not a good time to be making decisions about trying the next step with starting the new job - the job itself is not too difficult, and I have a huge budget, which makes a lovely change, but there are a few issues about settling in which will be resolved in the next two weeks, and that means that I have been too unsettled to really want to get stuck into thinking about "IT". 

Was going to say more, but there probably isn't really much more than that, and DH has just rung to get picked up from the station. 

Take care all

Love
Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning everyone

Thanks for the Annie update, Polly.

Weren't really having s the 3 weeks before the smear test as I was too worried about that to cope with other things like that!  However, as long as   stays away this weekend, we're going to 'get on' with it as it were, and do it much more regularly so I don't slip backwards in my progress (plus it's not fair on DP really as he 'gets none' as it were!).  

I hope I didn't dredge up any bad memories for you by mentioning my baby dream.

I'm hoping for a house previously owned by an older person so I can strip it down and do it my way, and get a lower price for it!  

Emma, hope you and Will are ok.  Are you off for another walk today?  

Hello Donna and Deedee (and Annie for when you're home and reading through all this).

Anyone got anything exciting planned for the weekend?  I'm meeting an old friend for a few drinks tonight, stripping wallpaper tomorrow and going shopping on Sunday with another friend (need to buy a present for my brother's mate's newborn ... he can't cope with such things and I like nothing better than looking at extra soft teddies and little booties!)

x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Morning all,

What a yucky   day. No dog walking for me, I fear. I do have to go and buy food though as we have none at all. Hopefully we will have TV again today - the reception failed a couple of weeks ago and I haven't got round to doing anything about it until now - just in time for the Eurovision Song Contest (although it isn't what it used to be). A nice main is coming to tweak my aerial. 

I had a bad night last night, ending up with me driving around Hitchin at 3 in the morning just to get him to sleep. It did work though, getting me a couple of hours sleep. It would have been more if I hadn't dropped and lost the car keys when we got home. I had to crawl around in the dark and rain looking for them. 
Found them in the end though...

Claire, Polly - all this wallpaper stripping.  You can come and do mine when you've finished, if you like.

Polly - I hope you can iron out the teething troubles at work. Are you looking at more houses this weekend? How is ebay going?

Deedee, Donna - hope you are Ok.

Annie - you almost certainly won't be reading this, but I hope you are OK. I bet you can't wait to get out tomorrow. Hospitals are the noisiest places, aren't they. I got p****d off with midwives coming in at 2 in the morning to wake me up to check my temperature or BP etc and gossiping loudly outside my door. 

Claire - your weekend sounds lovely as always. Hope you manage some 's' too.

Better go and take advantage of a rare quiet moment to tidy up.

have a lovely day,
Emma, xxxx


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Hellooooo Everybody!

Well, I did it! My gorgeous (if i do say so myself) daughter is here and she is everything I spent three and a half years dreaming about and then some.

*HUGE * thank-you to Polly for keeping everyone updated and checking in on us regularly. Very much appreciated x

As Polly reported I managed to sustain a nasty injury during labour  It was all going so well for a long time. Contractions started at 3am on Tuesday morning just as DH was arriving home from his first overnight shift in a year! I stayed at home until 11:30 just using a TENS machine (very good stuff!).

When I got to the hospital I was 4cms dilated which was pleasing! All kept progressing nicely. Had an epidural at around 5pm. Got to 8cms nicely and then it all started going downhill! Contractions slowed right down, cervix stopped dilating, Hannah was getting distressed and I was delirious with sleep deprevation.

They gave me something to try and speed things up and eventually I was fully dilated. 2 hours of pushing and I simply couldn't get her out. Her heart rate was dipping scarily then so they called for a Dr to come and help us out. He decided on a vontuse delivery and told me I had 3 pushes to get her out as she wasn't happy at all. Well I gave it all I had then and out she plopped in one go.

I could see then that the room full of people were all twittering amongst themselves and finally a very sorry looking Madwife explained that I had torn very badly as I pushed her out and that I had to go to theatre immediately to repair the damage 

They sped me along the corridor and left DH in the room with Hannah for over an hour whilst they stitched away.

They stitches themselves actually don't hurt as such. I'm very much aware they are there, believe you me. However the scariest part of it is the long term damage. They've scared me with talk of incontinence, physio sessions and loss of sensation when going to the toilet. Guess it's early days and I'll have to wait and see.

So, that's the story in as much of a nutshell as a chatterbox like me can manage. We came home yesterday. I still haven't slept for more than an hour and am beside myself today and very weepy. Just waiting for the Madwife to arrive and trying to convince myself that Hannah does not need a bottle and that my bb's are doing just fine. I'm sure a bottle would sort out the sleep problem!!!

Love to each and everyone of you. Can't wait to catch up on all your gossip!

Annie x


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi Annie

It's great to have you back, and with your lovely baby girl!  Are we getting pictures?!  

Sorry about the tearing incident  , I felt quite faint just reading about it!!    I'm glad you're both ok though and wait and see if there is any longterm damage.  I have a friend who had a nasty tear giving birth a few years ago and she had no longterm side effects in the end, and is due to pop her second one out any day.

What's a 'vontuse delivery'?  Sorry probably me being dense.

Oops supposed to be in a 12pm meeting!

xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

Annie - *wonderful* to have you back with us.  Your labour and tearing incident sound horrific. What an ordeal. I'm sure that the talk of incontinence etc is just doctors giving a worst case scenario speech; I bet it won't come to that.
The weepy thing is perfectly normal, especially on day 3 or 4. Heavens, I'm 3 weeks in and still burst into tears at the slightest thing. The sleep deprivation, on top of the ordeal of labour, is bound to take its toll. You'll get through it my dear, somehow.
If you want to breastfeed, do persist. I couldn't manage it until day 5 (and now the little darling won't stop). It takes time for you and the baby to work out what to do.

Take care, and do let me know if there is anything at all I can do to help. 

Emma, xxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

I'm off home now, hope you all have a good weekend!

    

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - I love seeing how excited you get about the weekend.  It really makes me smile every Friday.

Great news - we have a functioning TV again, and the nice (if rather smelly) young man connected up my Freeview box so I have more channels (in theory it shouldn't work out here). Will I be able to stop myself watching Big Brother now..... Breastfeeding may be exhausting, but at least it gives me an excuse to watch hours of TV. 

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend. Dh and I are looking forward to our first weekend without hoards of relatives staying/visiting. No great plans for me other than an eye test tomorrow. The excitement never ends...

Emma, xxx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

I just knew I would miss Annie's news  
Congratulations on the birth of Hannah you sound so proud and so you should be, well done. Your labour sounds horrible as did your Emma, quite scared now!

Emma you sound like you are getting more and more on your feet everyday, your doing great! have no idea how I will manage when mine are born.

Polly sorry about the house and problems at work. hope they are minor problems that can be resolved. Sorry you aren't feeling you can post you know we love hearing from you and all about what you are up to.

Deedee how exciting your scan is on monday, I will do my very best to log on on monday to see how it went.

Claire, well done on the smeat test and good on you for throwing the dilators and spectulum away you clearly don't need them now. Good on you!
DP given you a ring yet?

Saw the midwife yesterday and everything was fine she was very nice but wont be the one I see everytime as she was off sick today so I'll meet her next time which is in July!
Haven't heard from hospital about my scan yet but hopefully appointment will come through in a day or to.
I have been refered to a Twin clinic at the hospital for closer monitering and will be seen by the dibectic clinic at 28 weeks as my dad is diabetic so they have to keep an eye on me incase I develop it in pregnancy.
After having a week off from actually being sick I was sick on friday so it hasn't gone completley yet! still feeling sick all the time though.
I haven't been able to log on because I have been so tired that I am coming home and going to bed not that it makes any difference!

Been in a tizz this week because I don't want to return to work after the twins are born and couldn't afford the child care for 2 anyway! but it DH's wage just doesn't cover rent and living expenses!

Love to all especailly the new memebers Will and Hannah xx

Donna xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Afternoon all,

Donna - I hope you are resting. Growing twins must be utterly exhausting. I'm sure the sickness will clear up soon, and certainly by 14 weeks, and then you can start blooming. I'm sure you will cope just fine when they are born. At least you must know what you are doing with babies - I haven't a clue. It is a very steep learning curve. I read all these books beforehand but nothing prepares you for the reality and the sleep deprivation. I am full of admiration for people who cope with twins, triplets etc.

It is very sweet of you to say that I am getting on my feet - not sure I feel like that yet. I know i must be broadly doing the right things because he is still alive, and is eating and pooing and wearing clean clothes, but sheer exhaustion makes it so hard to feel like I'm coping. I'm sure it will get easier over time though.

I didn't make it to my eye test. Will was too busy feeding. I will try again next week.

Hope everone is Ok. I wish summer would return...

Emma, xxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Hi everyone,

WELCOME BACK ANNIE , and welcome to the world baby Hannah. I LOVE that name and have to admit, it is high on our list of contenders for girls (it was my late granny's name).

Like Claire, there was some wincing and leg crossing when I was reading about the delivery but Im sure with the epi you didnt feel anything (?) Cant wait to hear more about Hannah and how you are getting on...

Emma- I cant imagine how you are feeling and wish I could give some helpful advice. All I know is that you have to try and sleep when the baby sleeps and let the housework go to pot. Im sure you are doing far more than 'just coping'. Hang in there!! 

Polly- 'woodchip wallpaper with gloss paint' doesnt bear thinking about!! What are some people on Would be a very satisfying job stripping it all off though.....

Donna- Sorry you are are still sick babes, i thought you must be feeling rough as we hadnt heard from you in a while. Dont worry, IT WILL PASS and you will be blooming in no time.

Claire- anymore talk about 'the ring' How is the wallpaper stripping coming along?

We went out for a yummy meal last night to this fancy Asian place for our Anniversary and I even treated myself to a Bailey's coffee. Felt a little woozy afterwards but thats what 4 months without alcohol does to you!

Scan is at 2:30 tomorrow and Im soooo excited. We have decided that we are going to find out the sex but not tell anyone that we know. Except from all of you, of course.

Not much planned for today. Hopefully going to see Da Vinci Code tonight, (I loved the book). Reviews have been disappoitning but I have to see for myself.

I'll post as soon as I get back from scan tomorrow.

Luv dd xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Morning all,

Deedee - good luck with the scan. I'm sure everything will be just fine. You'll be amazed how that little blob has grown into something that resembles a baby. I can't wait to hear if it is a    or a .
How was the Da Vinci Code?

I'm at my wits end (or close to it) this morning. Will just won't sleep at all, and has been having hysterical screaming fits. I'm waiting for the health visitor to get to work so I can call her. I feel like the world's most useless mother at the moment.


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Emma you are absolutely not the world's most useless mother!  As you've said yourself, they don't come with a manual!  I think you're coping admirably.  

Deedee, be interested to hear what you think of the Da Vinci film.  I also loved the book and have been hesitating over seeing the film due to the poor reviews (and my intense dislike for Tom Hanks who I find to be a smug ****!

Donna, sorry you're still feeling sick.  Nearly to the end of it though, hang in there!

Polly, any house news?  DP and I have had our eye on a cottage in Shillington but it's now under offer and we're still some way away from finishing his house.  He's been tired from working long hours so we got practically nothing done this weekend house-wise. 

Annie, morning!  Hope Hannah is settling in well.

My weekend was good.  Saw a friend I used to work with on Friday night who is considering embarking on an affair with her new boss, she never did do things by halves!  Saturday was quiet, Sunday I spent the day shopping for baby things for my brothers friends newborn, got some great outfits from Boots and a great babysafe bear from the Bear Factory.  Never been in there to have a bear stuffed and sewn up before!  

Claire xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Just been to see the health visitor, who is wonderful; nothing is too much trouble. She thinks that he has a bad case of colic. I have to go back and see the GP this afternoon just to be sure that there is nothing else wrong. She has also arranged for someone to come and show me how to do baby massage to help settle him. The good news is that he has put on a lot of weight, so all that eating is doing him good if not me.

Claire - your weekend sounds lovely. Don't worry about the house - you have to have 'me' time too.

Got to go, love to you all
Emma, xxxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Hi all,

Well that was amazing, I could have stayed there all day. We asked the radiographer if could she tell us the sex but she said they weren't allowed to, she said she would point anything out if she saw it though!

We had a great view of the legs from underneath and couldnt see anything boy-like. At the end DH asked her if she was to put money on boy or girl which would it be and she said her money would definately be on...............a girl, so look like its going to be a pink one , although they are never 100%.

Everything is healthy, strong heartbeat and a great pair of long legs which we dont know where came from because DH and I have quite short legs (?)

What an amazing experience!

Da Vinci Code was just 'OK', although I didnt expect it to live up to the book. It fell a bit flat half way through and never recovered. Paul Bettany was good as Silas the monk, Oh and the pick & mix and popcorn went down well!!! (ps Claire- I dont think you will like Tom Hanks any better after seeing it)

Emma- at least you know what is making Will cry and you can give him something for it. Is it Gripe water or is that some old fashioned remedy? sounds disgusting!
What exactly is colic anyway?

Claire- your friend should watch out, an affair with the boss can only spell trouble, is he married or is she?

DD xx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning

Oooh potentially another girl for the vag team!  How exciting!  

Hmm, am being to think will wait to rent the Da Vinci code!  Thanks for the feedback Deedee.

I remember gripe water, I think I used to quite like the taste...  

Hope everyone is ok.

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again.

Deedee - I'm glad your scan went well. Another   for the vag team (probably)! Perhaps she will be a high jumper with those long legs. 

Hope everyone else is Ok. Annie - hope you (and Hannah) are settling in at home and are recovering well.

I went to a mother and toddler group this morning and it was really nice. It was only a small gathering but everyone was lovely. I got a bit more sleep last night, but am still a wee bit tired. We went to IKEA yesterday evening (to get a breastfeeding chair for upstairs) - far better than on a Saturday afternoon. it'll take me weeks to getround to building it though.....

Bye for now,
Emma, xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

hello,

I'd better post to stop us falling off page 1. Another 'me' post. Yesterday went rapidly downhill. Will was feeding non-stop from 5pm until 3am, when I couldn't do it any longer. He hadn't slept at all since noon (goodness knows where the expression 'sleeping like a baby' comes from). I hope he learns to sleep soon...

Hope everyone else is Ok. 

Annie - I hope you are feeling OK, and are having an easier time of it. If you have any tips please let me know.

Emma, xxx


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Emma, I do feel for you, but I'm sure that it is not something that will go on forever. The baby next door was quite noisy and her parents were quite dispairing for probably about the first six weeks, but then she seemed to settle and seems a remarkably cheerful and funny child, despite being almost 2. So maybe it's hard now to be easier later on? 

I'm sure you have been through all sorts of experiments with Will and none of these are original ideas, but have you tried giving him something else to suck? I know lots of mums don't plan on having a dummy anywhere near a baby, but if it helps everyone in the first few weeks I can't see the harm. Of course, it might not be what he wants, but if it works, then at least baby gets to suck without picking up on (completely natural) anxiety that he is never going to stop! And you get a break. Has the midwife/HV suggested supplementing his feed with a bottle? When I was doing my O levels, I often babysat a very squally baby (who has no doubt grown up knowing everythng about 19th century history!). He was a first baby too, but when his sister was born, his mum realised that he might have been permanently hungry. Again, not maybe how you planned to do it, but if it works....

However, you know best, and if I'm being irritating, please ignore me!  

Take care

Love
Polly


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Morning (just)

Emma, I wish I had a suggestion but I really don't know anything about babies as yet.  I can only offer you a   and my best wishes.  

I hope today's less fraught feeding-wise.

Claire xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Polly - you are never irritating.  Any advice is more than welcome. I know nothing at all about babies, despite reading lots of manuals beforehand; they are no preparation for the real thing (and all contradict each other). I don't feel like  know best at all. I'm wondering if there are baby sleep experts/troubleshooters out there who can come and observe what we are doing wrong at night and help, (and if there aren't there should be). 
I tried a dummy (even though I loathe the sight of them) but he just spits it out in disgust (I rather respect him for that, actually ). Perhaps he just genuinely is hungry, and is making up for lost time because he was quite small when born (I think I gave you all the wrong weight at the time, he was only 7lb, because I converted incorrectly from kg), although he is 8lb now. 

Last night, and again this morning, I have just left him screaming in his cot until he falls asleep, and it has worked, but I feel so cruel, and the sound of it really upsets me.

HV seems very anti supplementing feeds with a bottle, mainly because he is growing so fast on my milk and enjoying his feeds, but I'm close to cracking on that one. Lots of people seem to swear by it.

Anyway, enough about me. 

I hope all is going well with you, Polly. Any more thoughts about house buying/selling?

Thanks Claire - your support really does make a difference. 

Emma, xxx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

Sorry Deedee I didn't manage to log on on monday, glad scan went well and a girl how exciting! will you go mad on pink now?

Been feeling awfull all week just really tired and feeling constantly sick but after a really restless night last night DH told me to stay at home today! I rang work and told them I had the runs all night so couldn't come in. I know I will get major agro now from my manager who hates in when your off sick anyway and the fact I am pregnant doesn't go for me (she doesn't need another excuss to get narky!) tried to make it sound like I was off sick with something that wasn't pregnancy related but she is still gonna be pi$$ed off. Great! guess I'll deal with that tommorrow, she had stared to be ok with me again  
Hopefully only there for another 4 months but that seems a very long time now!

Annie I hope you and Hannah are doing well.  

Emma my friend who had a baby last year said it was a nightmare for the first 6 weeks and then things just seemed to change. you both need time to get used to things.
Have you tried infacol for the colic and wind? it is very very good. Gripe water is good but I don't think it can be used in babies under 3 months where infacol is safe from birth.
Don't worry about leaving him to cry I am sure it hurt you more than it hurt him, infact it wouldn't have hurt him at all. If you know he is fed, winded and dry then there is no harm in it.
You are doing finr and are certainly not a bad mother  

Claire and Polly -  Hello  

Donna xx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Thank goodness you're on hand, Donna, I feel so useless with this baby stuff!  

Wow, only another 4 months of work, lucky you!  Have you decided if you're going back there or elsewhere yet?  (sorry if you're already said)

Is anyone else's day going as sllloooowwwwlllllllllyyyyyyy as mine?!  

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

I am much calmer now .....

Donna - you poor thing. You've done the right thing by staying home today. Don't worry about your manager being p****d off with you. You need to put yourself (and the twins) first. You won't have to put up with her for much longer. The 4 months will come and go in no time. I hope the sickness clears up for you soon. 14 weeks is the norm, although Iwonder if it is different with twins. I hope you've managed to rest today.

Thank you for your advice about baby stuff. This is such a trial and error thing for me. I am using Infacol. In fairness, the HV said it would take a week to work, and that would be tomorrow. Gripe water can be used from 4 weeks (i.e. Friday), and I have some ready to go, but I've seen a lot of stuff on the internet that says it isn't so effective now that it doesn't contain alcohol. We'll see. Perhaps I should drink lots of wine before feeding him?   The HV (and lots of people on FF) recommended Colief, which I'll get tomorrow. I have been feeding, changing, and winding him, and then leaving him to cry (that sounds soooooo cruel) today, and so far it is working. He cries for about 10 minutes (which feels like forever) then sleeps for an hour and a half. I don't want to talk too soon though. I even managed an hours nap myself.

Claire - sorry your day is going so slowly. Hope the evening is better. I'm sure that this horrible weather doesn't help. I want summer to come back. No sign of it in the next few days though. 

There are 1001 things I should be doing, but I'm going to crash out on the sofa now with a cup of tea and a trashy magazine.

Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Afternoon

Emma, it sounds to me like you're making great progress with Will, hang in there!!  

Hope you enjoyed relaxing yesterday afternoon.

Hello everyone! 

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Afternoon all,

Hope you're all having a good day. Are you feeling any better today, Donna?

I had some sleep last night, but he seems restless again today.  Dh is off tomorrow, thank goodness, so we can share the stress.

No excitement here. I went out this morning to a garden centre (and it took hours to get out) which was rather disappointing, and didn't have any of the things i wanted. 

Got to dash,
Emma, xxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hello!

How is everyone?  Emma/Annie how are you getting on with your little 'uns?

Yet another seemingly long day at work today and it's still only morning!

Anyone doing anything nice at the weekend?

The kitchen has arrived and the bathroom arrives tomorrow for fitting Tuesday so lots of things to do including taking out the old kitchen ourselves (to save money).  Am also going shopping Monday with my mum all day, and very excited to have Tuesday off work to do very little.  

Are hoping to engage in some s at the weekend too now af has left.  I think we need to do it more often because I am still apprehensive and it still hurts at first (probably the two are related) and I really do want to move past that and view it as an enjoyable experience rather than a necessity.  Don't get me wrong, I'm delighted to be able to do it at all but ... well I'm not the most patient person!  

Anyway I'm waffling on and probably talking to myself so cheerio for now!

Claire x


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## Candy (Mar 8, 2004)

OMg Emma where have I been, congratulations on the birth of your beautiful son to and Anniw on your daughter .........

Emma the fisrt 6weeks are the hardest, Jacob had terrible colic for the first 3months (Although I find the harder bits not easy to remember now which is fab) we found ourselves driving up and down the motorway, Jacob also wouldn't take a dummy although I do think had he things would have been easier, at around 3months he had this incredible urge to suck and just couldn't get his fingers in his mouth so I tried the cherry dummy instead of those supposidly better for teeth ones and he had that still now for naps, but what you are doing letting him cry although hard now, is probably the best thing, if I had another, I would teach them to learn to sleep on their own which is just what you are doing, so good on you x

Do try and get some rest when you can, the first few outings for me, where awful, I had a mini phobia of going anywhere on my won, just couldn't seem to cope with anything, trollies, car seats the works, but it gets easier and easier and quicker and quicker, I know always have his bag done and ready and keep things spare in the car but then  I have had over 10months practice.

So ladies what other news have I missed ?/

Candy x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Candy - thanks for the advice. It is reassuring to know that you do get through this stage and come out smiling the other side. After two reasonably good nights with Will (weds, Thurs), last night was shaping up to be a real stinker. Will was feeding and feeding and wouldn't settle. In the end I cracked at 1am and gave him a bottle of formula, and then he slept until after 6am! Fantastic! he woke briefly, and I breastfed him, and then he slept until 9. I think I just wasn't providing him with as much milk as he needs.
I don't mind the trips out if i know exactly what I'm going to face when I get there (suitables trollies etc), but the unknown terrifies me. Can you believe it - I went to Mothercare and they didn't have any trollies suitable for babies. 

Annie - how are you getting on?

Claire - I hope you're having a fabulous action-packed weekend

Polly - how is everything? Did you get your work problem ironed out? Any more house thoughts?

Deedee, Donna - hope you are both Ok, and resting.

I wish the weather would pick up........
Bye for now,
Emma, xxxx


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## Candy (Mar 8, 2004)

I am glad last night turned out well in the end, don't feel bad about giving in and adding formula just do what you feel is right, I do think its a good idea to introduce a bottle after breastfeeding is established with either expressed or formula, as my son point blank refuses it.... going to have to wean him off when DH can have a week off as hes starting to get teeth, although he only feeds night and morning now, hes getting a bit big and keeps pinching my nipples lol

About time they got some decent shopping trollies to and stop putting down strips that make the trollie make so much noise and bounce the poor baby wakes.

Cx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello everyone,

Emma glad things are improving with Will, you will soon get into a routine and as you said it is trial and error as no 2 babies are the same but you really are doing great even if you don't frrl it all the time.

Annie how are you and Hannah?

I've been in bed all day with a terrible headache which seems to be easing now, I have got some sea bands which are wrist bands that help stop sickness by using accupressure they seem to be working although they don't stop me being sick! but atleast I am not feeling sick all day.

I am having a nightmare at work nearly walked out on friday! it is a nightmare I want to leave but I cant! I know my manager wants me to leave and she is being such a bully! I am being accused of all sorts of things I haven't done but I can't prove it   I really cant face it there but don't know what to do 

Donna xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Donna - you poor thing.  Don't let her get to you or force you out. Would it help to sit down and have a chat with her about things? You've got nothing to lose. Is she accusing you of things to try and intimidate you into leaving? Feel free to PM me with more details if it would help to talk about it. Is there someone else (an owner?) you could talk to about the situation?

I'm sorry you feel so unwell too. I really do think it will pass soon, but that is no help today is it. Are you drinking lots of water and eating enough?

Hope everyone else is Ok and enjoying the holiday weekend. If only the weather would improve.

Dh is cooking at the moment - roast lamb, and it smells delicious. I bet I'll end up eating it with one hand though....

Bye,
Emma, xxxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Donna- Im so sorry you are having such a hard time at work. You really don't need that extra pressure. Dealing with morning sickness is enough without that!!!
Is your boss the type of person you could talk to about it? or is there a colleague you are close to or anyone else in authority?

Emma- I can't believe Will is 1 month old!! How are you getting on? How was your roast lamb? (I wish DH was a good cook!)

Im getting serious kicks now. We started to watch a film last night but ended up fixated on the movements of my belly, it looked like Bob was trying to get out!!!!

I hope Annie is ok, has anyone heard from her?

Hope everyone else is ok.

DDxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Morning all,

How are you all today?

Donna - are you feeling any better? I hope you've managed to get lots of rest this weekend. Try not to worry too much about work tomorrow (easier said than done i know). When is your next scan/doctor/midwife appointment?

Deedee - the kicks are just fantastic aren't they. I really miss that bit of being pg. How big is your bump now? No, I haven't heard anything from Annie.....

Polly, Claire, Annie - hope you are all Ok. 

Still no sign of summer.  I haven't been anywhere for days. I actually managed half an hour in the garden yesterday, which was just wonderful. Dh being here for the weekend has been a mixed blessing. Nice as it is to have his company and moral support with this baby lark, he makes so much mess and it drives me crazy. He can't even see that he is doing it. It is wonderful of him to cook and do odd jobs about the house, but by the time I've factored in the time spent clearing up after him I'm not sure it is worth it. I think I'd rather live on ready meals off paper plates. 

Bye for now,
Emma, xxx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello all,

Hope you are all enjoying the weekend.
Friends may be taking us out to the cinema later and for something to eat which is nice although I feel shattered and just want to sleep!

Went shopping with DH this afternoon and nearly fainted! thats the 3rd time it has happend, did mentiopn it to midwife but she said it is normal.
Seeing midwife again on the 3rd of July and my next scan should be NOW! but I haven't had the appoinment through so I have to ring them tommorrow.

The problem with work is the manager (although I have yet to see her manage anything) is the owner! all the staff - well all 4 of them are very 2 faced and look out for number one! so are very quick to make themselves look great no matter what! will have to see what tommorrow brings! I am dreading it!

Annie I hope you are ok?

Deedee I really need you to have a ticker, how many weeks are you now?

Polly and Claire I hope you are both ok.

Emma your roast sounded lovely I am craving some proper food been really bad the last few days!  

Donna xx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Donna- I HAVE got a ticker (finally!). Can you not see it Let me know if you cant and ill try to fix it. Im nearly 22 weeks now.

DD


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello

Deedee - you definitely have a ticker ticking away.  Well over half way now......

Donna - hope work isn't as bad as you expect today.  Try and hang on in there for these next few weeks/months. The time will have gone before you know it. Hope you are feeling a bit better. Growing twins must put a real strain on your body, I'm sure.

Claire, Polly, Annie - hope you are all OK. 

Goodness, the sun has finally come out. 

No excitement here. My little man is waking up for yet more food.....

Emma, xxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Afternoon!

Rescuing us from our plight towards page 2! 

Emma, hope things ok with Will today. Re DH, men do make the most awful mess don't they?! DP is the same. 

Deedee, wow you're so far along now, I can't believe it! 

Annie, how are things with Hannah? Hoping for an update soon.

Donna, your boss sounds like a truly awful woman , well done you for hanging in there. My advice would be watch your back for the time being and look ahead to the arrival of your twins and leaving her to her nursery. Remember, you may have to put up with her for the time being but she's stuck with herself for life. 

Polly, hope all is well with the ebay empire!

Well no great news from me. Had s once at the weekend and it *still * hurts, is the pain supposed to go away after a while? Only hurts for about 5 seconds for the initial 'entry' (sorry probably tmi) but I really want that to go away... Probably seems like a far away concern for you now you have your pg or your babies I suppose, hope one day I feel that way!!

Anyway better get on, work is really awful today and trying to keep busy until home time.

Take care all,

Claire x


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## pollyhoping (Jun 15, 2004)

Hi all
Just had a text from Annie - she's doing fine, but just snowed under with getting used to baby with no manual (funny, Emma said the same thing  ). She sends her love and misses us all.

Emma - are you continuiing to gve Will an extra bottle, and is it still helping?

Claire - sounds like a typical worry pain - you worry that it will hurt, and then you are tense, so it does. The gynae that I saw when I was not-even-a-teenager used to tell me to try and stick my bottom to the couch: when you are tense, you tend to curl your bottom up, and by keeping it on contact with the bed or whatever, it is harder to be tense. It does work, or maybe it just gives you something else to think about!

Deedee, glad you have a ticker now! 

Donna, sorry that you are not happy at work - best to try to stick it out though...

Not loads of news from me, work has settled, as I predicted, it was a very practical thing that needed to happen. We haven't found another house, although we haven't looked that hard recently. Ebay is a bit slow, I have to make things that people will BUY, not things I LIKE!   Got a couple of good things on there that I wouldn't touch with a bargepole, but others are obviously interested!  

Anyway, better get on....

Love
Polly


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

Apologies for brevity and typos - 1 handed typing!

Polly - lovely to hear from you. If you are texting Annie again please send my love. Glad you sorted the work thing out.

Claire - sex doesn't seem like a far away concern at all, quite the opposite. I'm terrified of trying again for fear it won't 'work' and worrying that my stitches will tear. We almost had s once at the weekend, but I panicked. It is so long since we did have s that it feels like a huge deal.
From what I remember  it hurts less with practice. The 1st time after a break always hurt a bit.

Deedee, Donna - hope you are ok.

I've had a busy old day. My boiler broke, and I had a chappie come to fix it, but I've a worrying feeling it has broken again. Then a dog hurt a paw and had to go to the vets.
We are still experimenting with one bottle of formula at night. It seems to work better when dh gives it, and does make him sleep a little bit longer. He is growing so fast though, that I can't begrudge him all that feeding. He must be so hungry.
I felt terrible moaning about dh a few days ago. He was so lovely the rest of that day, preparing food, doing errands, etc, that I felt very guilty. I think tiredness had made me irritable.

Got to go,
Emma, xxxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi

Thanks Emma and Polly for the advice.  The bottom thing does sound like it's worth a try!  DP seems to think the more we do it the better it will be and I guess I was just forgetting how very difficult it was at first compared to now.  

I'm sorry Emma, I think I was being insensitive thinking it would become a much lesser concern now.  Do you have an approx time to wait after stitches?

Polly, it always amazes me what people buy off ebay.  Things I think will go like hot cakes don't and things I think are hideous are in high demand!!  I even sold 5 packets of alcoholic wipes the other day now I've thrown all related implements in the bin and was sure they wouldn't sell and I made a few quid.  

Thanks for the Annie update.  Glad to hear things are going well.

Donna, Deedee   

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - you weren't being insensitive at all.  I just didn't want you to think that you were on your own going through these kind of feelings.
The hospital said that the stitches would take 2-6 weeks to heal. I think they have really, but things still feel a bit odd 'down there' when I sit in the bath. If I was very keen, i could check it all out with a mirror, but I'd rather not. 

Hope work is better today.....

I've got someone coming round today to show me how to do baby massage, other than that an uneventful day, hopefully.

Emma, xxx


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

hi Everyone!

I've got about 5 seconds to chat, so I need to make it a quick one yet again!

Just to let you know that I am still here, just finding it impossible to get across the road and wait for this prehistoric system to dial up.

Hannah is doing fine. I just can't figure her out yet. Every day and indeed every feed is different. Luckily she seems to be able to go for about 3 hours a time through the night so we are getting some sleep but otherwise we are like zombies. The Madwives and Health Visitor are like chocolate tea pots and just keep telling me I have to get on with it and it'll get better eventually - huge help as you can imagine.
We're trying a faster flow teat again today but last time I tried I think I nearly choked her! 
She now weighs 7lb 15ozs so I know she's not starving! 

I'm still a bit tender down there. Stitches smart a bit and things still don't feel "normal". Not sure how long it's all meant to take to heal? You know me - want everything yesterday!

anyhoo - best go and relieve DH. He goes back to work on Monday and I'm petrified!

Should only be another 4-5 weeks before I'm home and back with my broadband and I'll be able to chat everyday again - can't wait!

Love to you all and speak soon xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Annie - wonderful to hear your news. Glad you are doing OK, and it sounds like you are. Are you exclusively bottle-feeding? I'm hanging on in there with breastfeeding for the moment, but don't know for how long, and with one bottle at night time. I'm very jealous of your 3 hour stretches of sleep. Those are the exception rather than the rule here.
HV keeps saying that things get better at 6 weeks, so I'll let you know. My MIL, ray of sunshine that she is, said it all sorts itself out by 8 months.  If it is any encouragement, i feel a bit less like a zombie this week, although I'm exhausted by the evening. Perhaps you just get used to the lack of sleep over time? Bear in mind you had a difficult birth, and it will take time to get over that.
It is terrifying when dhs go back to work. I was bursting into tears with relief the moment mine came back each day (then getting scared that he wouldn't want to come home if that was what he had to face each day). You'll have lots of support from friends and family, won't you. I'm terrified about tomorrow when dh has a work summer party. It'll be the first evening I've had on my own. And he goes away for a weekend soon - too scary for words. I might have to get my parents to come over (who, incidentally, have been brilliant since Will was born - it has really made us much closer), although part of me would like to prove to myself that I can do it alone.

I was only thinking yesterday about how you said, when pg, that you were looking forward to being on maternity leave so you could do lots of cooking and become a domestic goddess. It doesn't quite work out like that, does it.  I have cooked only 2 meals in the past 5 weeks, and long for the day when I can bake things again. 

Summer appears to have gone again. It has been raining all morning and my poor dogs haven't had a walk. On the plus side, I've finally unpacked the last box of my clothes (not that they fit anymore). 

Better go, W is waking,
Emma, xxxx


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Annie, great to hear from you!  Glad you're OK and will be back with us soon!

Emma, thanks - it is good to know that I'm not alone although at the same time don't wish these thoughts on anyone else, if that makes sense!  

I'm with you on not looking down there to see, I wouldn't either!    Can I ask, is the tearing a thing that happens outside or inside?    Sorry you probably don't want to think about it but I'm curious!!  

Nearly Friday, getting excited already!  Anyone doing anything exciting this weekend?

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Claire - I don't mind you asking at all, but (sounds stupid I know ) but I'm not 100% sure. Just after I'd given birth they said it was a big vaginal tear. I think it was just external as the stitches seemed to be on the outside. 

As for the weekend, dunno - enjoying the long overdue sunshine


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi

Thanks for answering my nosey question Emma!  

Hope everyone has a good weekend planned.  I've got takeaway pizza tonight which my brother is buying for me, my parents and DP following his promotion last week.  A massage tomorrow and an eyelash tint ready for Barcelona (less than two weeks to go!), and a walk in the sun (please let it be very sunny!) on Sunday.  Oh, and some s as part of my therapy.  

Emma/Polly have you ever eaten at the Lilley Arms?  DP has decided he wants our next meal out to be there but I'm wary as we know nothing about the food standards and noone who's eaten there before!!  The way the football is panning out I probably won't get my meal out for some time anyway  but I'm hopeful nonetheless!

Claire x


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hi Claire - no, I've never eaten (or drunk) at the Lilley Arms, I'm afraid, even though it is only 2 minutes walk from my house. I've asked a few people, and they are quite non-commital. We planned to go for a drink and see what peoples' food looked like, but it never happened. It looks Ok from the outside (better than the Silver Lion).

Hope you have a lovely weekend. The weather should be nice, and about time too.

I've just had a very uncomfortable conversation with the chap we bought our house from. A horrible misunderstanding on his part, but he was really upset and thought we were trying to defraud him. I sorted it out, but I feel really shaken up now. I hate scenes and unpleasantness, and this came from nowhere so really shocked me. It was all i could do not to burst into tears, especially with only 3 hours sleep last night.
Horrible.....

Emma, xxxx


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## deedee2 (Dec 9, 2005)

Hi all,

Annie- Welcome back! can't wait to have you back full-time with us soon.  I wish I could give you some advice on parenting but Im a complete novice. I'll be plaguing you and Emma for tips when october comes!

Emma- it sounds like you are doing an absolutely brilliant job. When dh goes away I would take advantage of all the help you can get. Hang in there!!
I didnt know that you Polly and Claire lived close to each other!! How weird... you could pass each other in the street and not know!

Claire- Im so jealous. You always have great plans for your weekends and really make the most of them.
Tonight we are babysitting a friend's two year old (she'll be asleep so just a matter of putting the dummy in when it falls out!). Tomorrow Im meeting an old work friend for lunch and looking at carpets for the new house.

Went to pregnancy yoga last night and it was such a laugh. The bumps ranged from 14 weeks to 39 and we ended up squatting, straddling birthing balls and lying on the ground with our legs up the wall- what a sight but if it helps come delivery day Im all for it!!!
Its a beautiful day here and Im off so have begun a marathon cleaning session. I suppose Id better think about packing as we move in two weeks!!

Hi Donna and  Polly 

Bye for now

DD x


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## goblin1975 (Oct 6, 2005)

Hi

Thanks for the Lilley Arms info Emma. If we do go there I'll let you know how it is!

I suppose it is a bit weird living nearby as I drive through Lilley at least once a month, usually by accident when I'm lost on my way somewhere else! 

Deedee, how exciting you'll soon be moving! I've been scouring the house pages for our top 5 villages in anticipation, but the house we really liked (in Shillington, if that's of interest to anyone!) is under offer now, but it was *perfect*. 

Anyway, the bathroom is now in, the bath didn't quite fit and I _told_ DP it was too big but he wouldn't listen so are now missing some plasterboard! Kitchen wasn't fitted as planned as the bloke's wife was rushed into hospital for an emergency caesarean at the weekend, which is fair enough really, hopefully it will be done on Monday.

Well the weekend is nearly here.          Soo excited to not be at work!

Claire x


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## AnnieR (Nov 22, 2004)

Can you believe - I'm back again! We're at the Out Laws watching cricket - or they all are anyway. 

Claire - In answer to your question. I had a third degree tear. That means I tore through three levels of tissue. I had to be stitched from the inside to the outer layers. Think I've torn one of the outer ones in the last few days. It's really stings and I think it's bleeding - fan bloody tastic! nobody warns you about these things!
I'm still walking like Jane Wayne!

Emma - Oh how you have brightened my day. I was devestated to do so but I had to give up on the breast feeding. Hannah was taking in so much air and ended up really colicy. Soon as I shifted to bottles it's been so much better.  i still cried for a day solid though as i was really enjoying it.
Hannah is a bit grumpy during feeds in the day. If you take her out and about she settles in her car seat and can sleep for between 3 & 4 hours. Night times she's going between 2 1/2 - 3 hours.  I thought that was bad?!? I thought babies slept 4 hours +?!? 
Domestic Goddess - HA! What a joke. I'm lucky if I get to brush my teeth in the morning and that's with DH around! It is getting better though. I've been out on my own shopping with her (had fun with pram and car seat), MIL takes her for little walks, I've managed lunch with friends (DH in tow)
I even braved trying on clothes yesterday. Could get my usual sizes on both top and bottom, but the bottoms are a wee bit snug still. Guess it's not bad for 2 weeks, I just expect ALOT!
I can't wait to get back on line so I can talk to you and get some support. I've been feeling utterly useless since Hannah arrived. 

Donna - Hope the twins are cooking nicely!

Deedee - Cannot believe you are 22 weeks. Did you find out the sex? Did I miss that piece of info?

Polly - Thanks for checking in with me the other day. It was sooooo great to hear from a Fertility Friend

right - best go before the Out Laws wander up and peer over my shoulder.

TTFN xxx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello again,

Claire - hope you have a lovely weekend.

Deedee - yoga is supposed to really help speed labour along (not that I did it ). I'm hoping to start postnatal yoga classes next week, but I'm not a very bendy person. No legs round the neck for me.  Don't overdue the cleaning and packing.

Annie - i am so jealous of you fitting into your clothes, or near enough. I can get into some bottoms but not jeans, and none of my tops fit because I now have huge boobs. I'm also eating all the time - breastfeeding makes me really hungry - although I'm trying not to eat too much rubbish. I even take a little lunchbox to bed at night with food to see me through the small hours. 
We had a bad night last night - only 3 hours sleep total - as I experimented with not giving any formula top-ups. I won't be doing that again. I too didn't get dressed until 11am, amnd was desperately trying to go to the loo for hours.
After days at home I finally went into town this afternonn and, stupid me, forgot to take my purse. Doh!

I had my SIL and children here today, which was lovely. I keep plaguing her with baby questions.

Polly, Donna - hello

Have a lovely weekend everyone,
Emma, xxxx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hello,

Sorry I have been away been a bit of a funny week this week.

Annie good to hear from you and you sound really well which is fantastic. shame your midwife and HV aren't much support though  

Emma you seem much happier now to and much more into the swing of things, don't worry about DH being away you are doing fine and can more than cope on your own.

Deedee sorry your ticker was there all the time just me being a bit thick!  

Polly glad you sorted things out at work now, are you enjoying it? how do you find working for someone else?

Claire you are certainly not alone re 's' Dh and I haven't attempted it since before I got pregnant which was in MARCH! bit worried now that I wont be able to do it! but hopefully its like riding a bike  

Been feeling awfull this week sickness steped up to morning and evening!, had headache all week and was feeling faint and dizzy so midwife sent me to hospital on wednesday to be checked over as I am a high risk pregnancy and there is high blood pressure  in my family! All was fine though thankfully.
Was having an awfull tiem at work so after wednesday decided to take the rest of the week off! couldn't face calling my boss so DH did it for me, her reply was I have had enough of this she does this every friday! I have never had a friday off so she is talking $hit as usuall but by being off I have probably made the situation much much worse! I just hate going in. Since I have been pregnant nothing I do is right or good enough. I don't have any proof that she is discriminating against me because of teh pregnacy though!  

Had scan yesterday which was fantastic! they are too big to be on screen together which is a shame but they have to grow!
Twin A was being difficult and curled up so we couldn't see him/her properly at first but Twin B was jumping about   it as wierd seeing them move but not being able to feel it. Had nuchal done to which showed a little over 1:5000 for both babies 
My next scan is 31st July and I should be able to find out sex's then. they also offer a scan of my cervix then to see if I am likely to go into labour prematurly its harless to the babies so think I'll have that done to!

Seeing a consultant in the twin clinic on the 15th work are not going to be pleased. I hate gping in with appointments as she gets all narky about it!

Dont know what to do today I think I may have a bath then sit in the garden with a book, may even star sorting out the spare room! feel ok today so far, hope this is a turning point!

Donna xx


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## emmadaffodil (Apr 7, 2004)

Hello,

What a lovely sunny day. I've been sitting in the garden all afternoon, enjoying the sunshine and feeding Will. I was hoping to do some gardening, but he is having none of it. I had a bit more sleep last night and do feel vaguely human today.

Donna - what a tough week you've had. Your boss sounds horrible. She must have a lot of problems in her own life, I reckon, and takes it out on you. You'll be out of there soon.
Glad you're feeling a bit better today.
The scan sounds good. I'm sure you'll be able to feel them in the next month or so. I think I did at about 17 weeks.

Hope everyone is  ok,
Emma, xxxx


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## Holly C (Sep 22, 2004)

New home this way >>>>>>>>>>>

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,59552.0.html

H xx


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