# help ! going through my first treatment and have work issues



## joyceblue

Hello, 

I have started buserelin a week ago  and if all goes well , i should have the transfer towards the end of this month ..i work for a bank in a " not very friendly" environement to say the least ...very stressfull and very long hours ...
From what I have read in different books and on web sites , it would be recommended taht i  take time off between collection and transfer and then after transfer ..
My issue is that I will not  get  any time off for more than a couple of days approved  and cannot either tell them what i'm going  through...

I 'm thinking of going to the GP for a sickness note but i am not  sure of what reason i should use no to raise suspicion at  work ... i 'm really scared taht they will probably find a way to fire me as business is not that great anyway at the moment ...

Has any of you any idea or experience  on what sickness reason to use to have week off for instance ?

Thank you  for this website , i  don't know anyone that went through IVF and tis website has just been soooo helpful !!

Good Luck to all


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## Loop

Hi
I work for a bank too so cultures sound similar. Last cycle I told them I needed a minor gynae op (boss asked what so I said cyst aspiration -not lie but not whole truth) so I took 3 days sick for ec. Tbh I really needed that time as they collected 15 eggs from 26 follicles and I felt rough. Weds collection so weds to fri off then Sunday et and back to work Monday. In hindsight I needed some time off for after et. This time I've got a weeks holiday and will do ec on tues and et on fri with weekend to chill out before returning to work but I still wish I could gave a week off after et.
If I were you I'd just ask doc to sign you off for 2 weeks for gynae reasons and use it for ec and recovery) and et ?? Best if luck it's stressful not being able to be upfront isn't it x


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## Wraakgodin

Hi Joyceblue!

First – good luck!!!!                           

I had my EC on Monday and booked a day off work, the ET was Thursday afternoon, so I took Thursday afternoon and Friday off (only to make it a long weekend, not because of anything the clinic recommended).  I was back at work on Monday morning and worked through the rest of my 2ww and got a BFP, so time off isn’t essential, in total I had 2 and a half days off.

Sue


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## patersong

Hi Joyce, my situation was similar to yours. I work for an insurance company and have to travel lots and work crazy hours. At the end of my first cycle I got a BFN after a chemical pregnancy. I have spent the past few days looking at the things which may have caused my to loose the embryos and keep on blaming the pressure at work.

My advice to you would be to get signed off bu your doc, at least that way you know that you have done everything you could to let the embryos stay put. That's what i will be doing with my frostie!

Best of luck to you


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## sparkleysophie

Hi Joyce,
From what you have said I would go to your GP and get the time off, esp in the environment you describe.    The GP does not need to put down the exact reason on the sick note. I have taken 3 weeks off in prior cycles from EC to past my OTD. If that is what you feel would help you best in this cycle, do what you need to do. By the way, this time I have taken 4 weeks off! It is up to you. My GP wrote 'gynaecological proceedure' for the previous ones and I had 'gynaecological disorder' this time.  There is no obligation to tell them - it is between you and your doctor. 
The other thing to say is best of luck and look after yourself.
Go to your GP and if one won't do it go to another as they should be more than willing to do this- I'd make a bee line for a female x


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## Bambino77

Hi Girls

I'd say sick note rather than make up story. I told one 'friend' in work (in confidence!!!) last week that I was going in for a laparoscopy (alias EC!) and needless to say it got around the office and our other office and the story came back that "I was going in for an operation to try and get pregnant!". It eventually got back to me - the day before I was starting stimming!!! Just what you need for the stress levels.  Anyway, its only now I can talk about it without crying, I was so upset that a 'friend' betrayed my trust like that and that folk would say such hurtful things. I'd never dream of spreading things like that about a colleague. It's been a harsh lesson learned for me.

So, i'd defo advise not making up a story as it just ends up tying you in knots, if you want to take the time off then I'd say doctor is best bet...

Good luck.
xx


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## kitten77

if your doc can sign you off do that, ive had 3 fresh cycles and have been signed off for all 3 of them (one week for ec/et and 2 weeks for teh 2ww) - (Ps my doc is the best ever and been very helpful)

BUT - none of these treatments worked - now im thinking i never moved around enough! (well you do think of things that you have done wrong dont you) - anyway, on next treatmetn i will be going back to work to see if it makes any difference! 

good luck with tx!!!


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## Cherry town

I made the decision to tell my closest work colleagues that I am having IVF they have been so supportive. I've also told my manager who was very understanding, it's helped me to plan my work load and time off for treatment I know that not everybody is in the same boat but I do think honesty is the best policy - they can't sack you and the reality is it's the most natural thing for a woman to want to have a baby even though its through medical intervention! Good luck and don't worry there's hundreds of women sneaking off to the FC every day


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## Dixie chick

Does anyone know how this sits from an employment law angle? I work in an an very old-fashioned, misogynistic, male dominated, unenlightened, indiscreet environment   and have no idea how to approach this.  I'm really worried about it and we're nowhere near beginning tx yet!

I don't want anyone at work to know until (hopefully) I'm at least 12 wks, because if they know I'm trying for a baby it will DEFINITELY have a negative affect on my work relationships and prospects, such as they are.  However, if I bend the truth or withhold information I'm worried they will also use that against me.  

I suppose I'm asking, my manager's unprofessional attitude aside, will I get in trouble if I'm not straightforward with them?


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