# Anyone else had problems with fc not wanting to give up child? UPDATED!!



## coxy (Aug 4, 2005)

Hi,

At Easter we were approached by a 1yr girls sw as we are the only people on the national adoption register who would accept a child with a genetic illness.

Since we found out and have read the girls CRP its been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster waiting for progress from sw's etc, (didnt help having easter hols!), anway....

The foster carer wants to adopt this child but for various reasons the LA wont allow it and they have told her they will not support her application to adopt, anyway.....

On Friday we had an update from the girls sw, apparently the foster carer has appealed against their decision not to support her and now we have to wait for panel on 21st April and then the childs sw will update us a few days later.....

What i suppose i am getting it, is what kind of panel would it be? and if anyone had these kind of problems with the FC of their children? the FC may appeal to the high court but i doubt if she will get legal aid.

Julia x

Update, our sw texted us last nite to say at panel on 21st the fc's appeal to be considered for the little girl has been turned down, she says this is good news, i just hope it doesnt mean fc will now appeal to high court!


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## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

Hiya

Sorry to hear you are having problems. As a foster carer myself I was not aware a carer could appeal if the childs sw wasn't supporting the child staying with them. Although that may differ with LA's
I would think that the "panel" she is talking about is at the adoption and family finding unit where the childs case is being handled. It is probably a meeting between managers etc to make a decision on what is happening. As the people who give the final nod so to speak are the adoption unit. The childs sw only has an opinion on it and not the final say.

Is it worth ringing the adoption unit if you arent getting any joy out of the sw? Or ring the sw and ask then to explain it all to you? 

hope things get sorted quickly for you

x


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi coxy

Just wanted to send my support  . What an awful situation to be in.
I haven't had any experience of this thankfully.
Our dd's fc told me that if she'd not been happy with sw's choice of couple, she would've barracaded herself and the child in, and not let her go! Which shows how attached fc's become to the children, especially when they've had them for a very long period. I would guess that the foster carer would have had her chance to come forward as potential adopter, before they started to family find. 
I cannot believe that SS are allowing FC to rule things, at this stage. And I cannot understand how the FC can put you, the child's new parents, through this. Especially when she knows you are the only match for this little girl, and by the sounds of it, a perfect match. How selfish of her. All this is doing, is delaying the placement of this child into her new family. This little girl needs to be top priority.
Sorry, I'll get down from my high horse now! 

I hope this is resolved for you as quickly as possible.

Love Everhopeful x


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## coxy (Aug 4, 2005)

Thanks ladies for your support, its probably just a case now of sitting back and waiting patiently   (not one of my best points) and seeing what happens.

I would assume at this point that they would probably take the child from the FC if the situation is becoming unhealthy?  
Julia x


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Hi Julia

Just hang in there & it will all work out!!  I know easier said than done!!

Both our FM were great, our DS foster Mum was fantastic but I was really worried about meeting her DD as she adored our DS & threatened to run of with him, she was 14 at the time!!

I thought that the second time around I wouldn't have this problem as DD was 9 months old & not been with her FM for long BUT Yet again it was her DD who said she run away with DD & I actually got introduced to this girl as my DD second Mum, something that did not go down great with our SW. This girl was older though at 21!!

So I have never had problems with foster carers But there DD!! TWICE!!! lol

Love
Andrea
xx


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## sjm78 (May 22, 2007)

Sorry to hear they are messing you about abit it would sometimes be nice to feel someone could make a quick decision on important matters. Keep strong patience isnt my best strength either keep us posted.
Sarah


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi again

Yes, I thought that if things would and could possibly be awkward and difficult during intros then SS would think about removing the child from her care and into another Fc home. Although then again, is another move just before placement healthy anyway??

Hang in there (I know it's hard!)

x


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## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

Coxy I would hope that the foster carer as a professional would bridge the child just as they would any other child in their care. 
The child would only be removed from that placement if they thought there was a serious risk of something

Hope it works itself out soon

x


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## coxy (Aug 4, 2005)

have updated, see post at bottom of original post.


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## sjm78 (May 22, 2007)

Keeping fingers crossed this is good news for you maybe she will get the message now. Keep us posted
Sarah


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## Old Timer (Jan 23, 2005)

Hi Julia

Fingers crossed this is the end of the hassel.

Love
OT x


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## Nefe (Jan 6, 2008)

Hi Coxy

I have pm'd you as i have a couple of questions.

Thanks

Nefe
xx


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