# need advice



## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Hello, I am new here. And I want to tell my story. I know a lot of women here have similar problems and I'm not alone in this world but I really need your support.
I was diagnosed with the infertility issue. My doc didn't tell why it has happen. I had 4 miscarriages, last was in April 2016. To my mind, I have a chromosomal abnormality and my body rejects foreigns(my babies). First they thought it was just a fluke but take prenatal vitamin..the second time they said I didn't produce any folic acid so take 10 of those a day, prescribed progesterone suppositories and one baby aspirin a day plus a prenatal..third time they said two baby aspirin a day, a prenatal, progesterone suppositories, and the ten folic acid.And 4th time was because of my age. I'm 45 and it's a big stress for me and my health.
As far as I know, being a 45 years old lady is a great challenge. First of all, the level of ovarian reserve becomes lower, natural pregnancy after 45 is a reason for developing different health baby's problems like diabetes and Down's syndrome.
So, I'm in despair and don't know what to do, I would be grateful if you give me any advices. Thank you in advance


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Hi Annasss

Welcome to FF  

I'm so sorry for your losses.

Have you been offered any recurrent miscarriage testing?  I'm not sure where you're based but this is offered on the NHS after 3 first trimester losses.  

Dory 
Xx


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Dory10 said:


> Hi Annasss
> 
> Welcome to FF
> 
> ...


Yes, I did an ultrasound scans and blood tests in order to measure my hormones. The karyotyoing showed that I have a genetic abnormality, my husband and me were tested for abnormalities with the chromosomes that could be causing the problem. The doctor told only de conception is for us, I don't know why but my amh became low, all problems are appeared at one time. I really don't know what to do..


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

If you're considering using donor eggs you might find this section helpful http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=551.0.

Dory
Xx


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Thank you but I have already been writing there. No results, probably I need to update my post, how do you think? 
I asked about the help..


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## Tincancat (Mar 19, 2012)

Hi Annasss 
I think maybe it's not clear what help you are looking for? Is it finding a clinic for donor eggs or help with where to go for investigation of your miscarriages?  
I think perhaps English isn't your first language so perhaps if you can explain a bit more about what help you are after then I'm sure there will be lots of ladies who can help. 
TCCx


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## NAT1DRAGONFLY (Jun 13, 2013)

Hi

Have you looked into immune testing for you? 

The reason I ask is that you say your body rejects the embryos - may be worth considering consulting with a fertility expert who specialises in immunes. They can then advise on possible medication, supplements etc to help support a healthy immune system for you. 

Good luck x


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Tincancat said:


> Hi Annasss
> I think maybe it's not clear what help you are looking for? Is it finding a clinic for donor eggs or help with where to go for investigation of your miscarriages?
> I think perhaps English isn't your first language so perhaps if you can explain a bit more about what help you are after then I'm sure there will be lots of ladies who can help.
> TCCx


Well, you are right English is not my first language because I'm from small town in Germany. My husband is from England and I had to learn it a bit. 
speaking about my issue. I just want to find a clinic which can provide me with de treatment. I was writing on different topics here but couldn't find a really useful information to me. probably it's all because of my poor English. 
I was advised to pay attention to Ukraine because this country has no age limits for women who want to try de conception. I'm not sure about it because I know nothing about reproductive medicine there.


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

NAT1DRAGONFLY said:


> Hi
> 
> Have you looked into immune testing for you?
> 
> ...


you mean pgd or what? The doctor told us to try de conception, he just said older eggs are significantly more likely to have abnormal spindles - and an abnormal spindle predisposes to development of chromosomally abnormal eggs, that's why I had the last 2 miscarriages. 
As I understood, all my next pregnancies will end with miscarriages. I don't want to experience this one more time. But I'm afraid what if de ivf doesn't work for us. What will be next? My emotions are mixed, I'm confused and devastated. I don't know what to do..


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## TinaOwen (Jan 26, 2017)

Poor girl! be stronger! everything gonna be alright! I don’t know what variants and  methods you have been considering. 
Actually you were right  it’s quite  difficult and even dangerous to be pregnant  and give a birth  at age of 45, but this age isn’t a challenge. I mean not so hard challenge as every other age. You have to be happy and feel gladness from the way you live. As for the treatment are really ready to try being pregnant by yourself? Or better to rethink about surrogacy as an option?


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## carbr (Feb 24, 2017)

Hi,
As for Ukrainian clinics, I've come across some information on the topic. There are quite a number of feedbacks on the Internet. But why exactly you are thinking about going somewhere? Are you so desparate for a child that you can't wait for ivf program at you place? Or are there any other reasons here? I mean as far as I understand your amh level is too low and your eggs can't be retreived any more.. but your womb is in order and you still can carry a baby.. Is that only because of time issue? Or are you looking for a surrogate if you say you're having miscarriages each time?


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## Tincancat (Mar 19, 2012)

Hi Annasss 
Not sure how old you are? I was 46 when I had my twins via donor egg treatment in Northern Cyprus.  There is no age limit in Northern Cyprus but you do have to have an ECG and letter from a doctor to say you are in good health then the Clinic applies to Government for you for permission to treat.  If you are similar age to me then donor eggs maybe best way forwards as most own eggs you produce will have a chromosome problem when you are 43 and above. 
TCCx


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## Denmommy (Jun 16, 2016)

I agree with carbr: with previous recurrent miscarriages, even egg donation may not work. sorry to say that but it's a bitter true. first of all, you'd better find the reason for your miscarriages and only then choose tx, as the costs for ED tx are also not as low as it may seem. 
first of all, you have to make sure if has good chances to work for you. otherwise, you may also consider surrogacy as an option


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## Tincancat (Mar 19, 2012)

If cause of recurrent miscarriage has been identified as being chromosomal and above 40 years then donor eggs will overcome this.  There is little point in spending huge amounts of money investigating cause of miscarriage if the cause is obvious. 
I would however agree level 1 testing for blood clotting problems etc are worth doing before DE treatment. 
TCCx


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Well, honestly, I don't know because I'm afraid of being pregnant at my age. 
haha, my mind is changing every second. I wrote here in order to look for a help. I do know nothing about surrogacy and I think it's very hard for women.
The doctor warned me about risks of miscarriages and genetic abnormalities of a child. But what should I do? if I do surrogacy it will mean my baby won't be mine. I'm confused you know


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

carbr said:


> Hi,
> As for Ukrainian clinics, I've come across some information on the topic. There are quite a number of feedbacks on the Internet. But why exactly you are thinking about going somewhere? Are you so desparate for a child that you can't wait for ivf program at you place? Or are there any other reasons here? I mean as far as I understand your amh level is too low and your eggs can't be retreived any more.. but your womb is in order and you still can carry a baby.. Is that only because of time issue? Or are you looking for a surrogate if you say you're having miscarriages each time?


Honestly, I don't know what to do. I'm worrying about different facts. First of all, I'm not too young anymore and every minute is important to me. I was advised to undergo de conception but we have to wait, the clinic said we could start treatment in 4 months. I suppose it's too much for us. we don't have this time to wait. So, we decided to go abroad. 
As far as know I can do de ivf as well as surrogacy. I was told that because of my failed attempts and miscarriages it is possible to start surrogacy process. But I afraid of it. 
No, I don't know the city I want to go. 'a number of feedbacks on the Internet' are you talking about ukraine, am I right?


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Tincancat said:


> Hi Annasss
> Not sure how old you are? I was 46 when I had my twins via donor egg treatment in Northern Cyprus. There is no age limit in Northern Cyprus but you do have to have an ECG and letter from a doctor to say you are in good health then the Clinic applies to Government for you for permission to treat. If you are similar age to me then donor eggs maybe best way forwards as most own eggs you produce will have a chromosome problem when you are 43 and above.
> TCCx


yea, agreed with you. I know being over 42 is dangerous both for a woman and a child. Well, the doctor allows me to undergo de treatment but he said it's up to me. I will be the one who is responsible for the baby's health. That's why I'm confused. from one side, I'm ready to carry this baby but from other I won't survive when something will happen to her or him. 
Tell me please, about that clinic, I would be grateful to you.


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Denmommy said:


> I agree with carbr: with previous recurrent miscarriages, even egg donation may not work. sorry to say that but it's a bitter true. first of all, you'd better find the reason for your miscarriages and only then choose tx, as the costs for ED tx are also not as low as it may seem.
> first of all, you have to make sure if has good chances to work for you. otherwise, you may also consider surrogacy as an option


oops, probably I missed your reply. I already have been writing about it. I know there is a chance of being miscarriaged that's why I'm not sure in de. But from other side, I'm afraid of surrogacy because I understand a baby won't be mine. Well, the doctor told that I can carry a baby, my health state is good for my age but he is not sure about next miscarriage as I was said before. 
Honestly, he can't explain the reason for it, he can't say why each my pregnancy ended up with unborn child. 
haha, I was browsing the Internet and found lots of reasons for that. Know I feel my misery and can't concentrate on my decision.


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Tincancat said:


> If cause of recurrent miscarriage has been identified as being chromosomal and above 40 years then donor eggs will overcome this. There is little point in spending huge amounts of money investigating cause of miscarriage if the cause is obvious.
> I would however agree level 1 testing for blood clotting problems etc are worth doing before DE treatment.
> TCCx


thank you for advice. Probably it's better to recheck my health state. Once we did it and the results showed that I have a chromosomal abnormality. It could be a reason for my miscarriages but doctor couldn't say for sure. 
Probably, I have to change my doc. It seems like I found out more information here haha. thank you one more time


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Hi Annass

You seem understandably confused as to which treatment plan is best for you right now   There are so many different options, medications and treatments it's easy to become overwhelmed with it all and then it seems like you don't know which way to turn.  I think the best thing for you to do is go back to your consultant/fertility doctor and speak to him/her about your options.  Ask about using your own/donor eggs and whether or not any previous tests indicate you would be unable to carry a baby to term. Deciding on next steps especially donor treatment and surrogacy is a big thing to consider so you need to be armed with all the facts.

Good luck & take care

Dory
Xx


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

Dory10 said:


> Hi Annass
> 
> You seem understandably confused as to which treatment plan is best for you right now  There are so many different options, medications and treatments it's easy to become overwhelmed with it all and then it seems like you don't know which way to turn. I think the best thing for you to do is go back to your consultant/fertility doctor and speak to him/her about your options. Ask about using your own/donor eggs and whether or not any previous tests indicate you would be unable to carry a baby to term. Deciding on next steps especially donor treatment and surrogacy is a big thing to consider so you need to be armed with all the facts.
> 
> ...


Actually, yes, I'm very confused. I had no idea what to apply for but 2 days ago I got an email from my doctor. it said I can undergo de ivf, so it has narrowed a circle of searching. Now, I have to define the criteria for my future clinic. I had some options but honestly, I'm not sure about it. How do you think where I can find a cheap one clinic? 
Thank you 
xxx


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