# Intros tips



## Hunibunni (Jan 18, 2009)

Hi lovely gals & guys 


Here I am up with the larks on my day off with my mind whirring away wondering whether I have missed anything off my list of 'things to do before intros' then it actually occurred to me to ask you lovely FF people a question.  Can you give me any tips. What did you forget and wished you hadn't, what did you think was a must have or must do.  I think it will be interesting to know.  I have intros in 2.5 weeks time 


Xx


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## Loopylou29 (Mar 4, 2013)

Take a camera for the first day


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## Frangipanii (Nov 21, 2011)

Hi. How exciting! I have a couple of things. How relevant they are I am not sure, as i dont know age of LO is another issue. 
One thing which was a life send was...pre-cooking and freezing meals for as long as possible. It meant we didnt have to think about cooking properly when we returned home. 
We took some little things in with us on first day in case it got tense: balloons, blowing bubbles bottle, etc. 
I not sure this relevant but expect something to go wrong...ie not getting on with foster mum, or some rejection or tantrums. I know it sounds pessimistic but it could help. And I wish I had thought about it. The foster carer found it hand letting us give any care to youngest. Daughter rejected me but she was three and I think you are going younger. 
Also don't dress to impress, just go in comfort. 
If there is anything in the fc's home that is staying there that you think you is perfect for LO then ask a friend/relative to get it before you come home. 
Above all enjoy meeting your son and I hope it goes amazingly brilliant! 
Love to you xxx


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## mummy2blossom (Feb 21, 2013)

Good luck hunibuni!  Have some good tips already!

Can't stress how easy to cook-pre made meals are to have!
Organise your home so when you get in you don't feel you need to clean/tidy
If you have given photos/DVD of yourself it's good to wear the same outfit & if you did make a DVD take the props you used (I used bubbles in DVD & read a story so kind of recreated DVD in front of lo)
Keep a diary/journal something lo might like to read in future 
Be prepared to be overwhelmed!
Don't expect anything then you won't be let down ie don't expect to be greeted with a smile/get a cuddle on first day-all goes at lo's pace so be relaxed and go with the flow
Rest & relax when home & get sleep-the thing we struggled with when blossom came home was not her inability to sleep but ours as we constantly checked monitor! 

Overall enjoy and create memories to treasure forever!

Sorry if I've waffled on (been up since 5 lol!)


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## Loopylou29 (Mar 4, 2013)

This is a selfish tip  .

Before intros start spend your last weekend doing adult things. Go for a posh meal, lie in bed until midday, have a boozy bbq (if the weather holds). Do the things you really enjoy that you won't be able to do for a while.


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## Hunibunni (Jan 18, 2009)

Brilliant tips guys! Keep them coming! LO is 12 months old 

I bought some food containers yesterday to pre-cook meals although I think DH's heart sank when I told him as he now thinks we are going to have spag bol for a week and was hoping for takeaways! I honestly do have a wider range of meals I cook than that! Lol

Xx


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## Frangipanii (Nov 21, 2011)

Ooh another one is take photos first few days then send them to a relative to get them framed and put in your house while u are away. I know hes only 12months but it makes a nice touch! X


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Intros top tips!

1)  It's hard.  It's wonderful, but it's hard, so don't plan to keep updating family, or do shopping, or give the house a thorough clean before LO arrives for their visit etc.
2)  The intros plan can change, keep on your toes.  Even if it looks like it's going great, don't let it speed up too much.  We didn't get to watch FC care for Bug AT ALL because intros progressed straight into us doing his care.  Which was great then, but left us floundering later.
3)  Cook and freeze meals.
4)  Abandon pride all ye who enter here.  Yes, you're never going to shout, they're going to eat home cooked meals all the time, they're not going to watch TV... best intentions, but not always practical.    And you will be messy within seconds.  I wore jumpers with snot on the shoulder all week.  And yes, I packed more than two jumpers... ggg
5)  Remind yourself, at least every hour, that you are WONDERFUL.
6)  Get someone to come and clean your house during the week.
7)  Bring a balloon, or bubbles, or something like that.
  If you want to cry, cry.  I don't subscribe to the notion that it's bad for children to witness their parents expressing emotion.
9)  Do some research about where to take your LO when you get to take them out yourself.  Our FC had no suggestions, and we were strangers to the area.
10)  If you don't want to do a thing a certain way, say so, and don't.  I refused to change Bug's nappy in front of a whole phalanz of SWers at a review meeting.  They were very keen for me to do so (probably wanted to see how I managed) but I said I was still learning, and neither Bug nor I needed the pressure, and took him to another room.  They had to wait.  *g*

Never forget.  It's a beautiful time, and so are you.


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## Brummig (Jan 14, 2011)

Love the one about sending pics and getting someone to frame them.

Totally agree, get the freezer well stocked, and set up supermarket delivery account with your favourites already listed so you don't have to worry too much about shopping when they arrive.  In fact online shopping is fab for most things!

While you are on intros keep a bag in the car including drinks and snacks - some FCs provide, not all do.  Also change of clothes for you both (just in case), phone charger, a book (we had to leave FCs for a couple of hours one day - not much to do in some places).  So include in your research of the area for things to do with them, but for you, eg places to eat, cash points etc.

We have a slow cooker which was great for some of the shorter days of intros and when she arrived.  

Don't get too hung up on the plan - it will change, usually without any check with you so try and go with the flow. SW  had said several things which were difficult for us (we have older child too) but we left it and then discussed with FC.

Agree with FC about contact as week goes on.  We are still in touch with ours, but it was great in the first few days knowing we could ask for advice but we had agreed this would be text or email which wasn't so emotional for us all.

It will be exhausting and emotional, but also amazing!


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## littlepoppy86 (Feb 14, 2014)

If you know your intro plan, find local things for the days you have them for all types of weather!

X


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## Hunibunni (Jan 18, 2009)

Really great tips...I knew you would come up trumps!  

Xx


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

We try.    Good luck!


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## Chambordcheetah (May 18, 2014)

Brilliant advice, which i obviously cannot add to, but just wanted to say . . . HOW exciting


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## Macgyver (Oct 27, 2008)

Hi


- take a camera
- take bubbles ( my lo loved them )
- take notepad and pen ( you can ask FC anything that pops in your head but you won't remember it by the time you get home )
- make sure you have ready meals for you & oh, as you will be to tired to cook
- get lots of snacks in, just incase you need a quick boost
- take a box of tissues, ( I must have used a whole box in the 7 days from tears of joy)
- send FC a gift ( if u want to, I sent a card and a painting done by lo)


Good luck at intros xx


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