# First timer at 40 and feeling hopeless



## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

Hi all.  I'm new here and this is my first post, but I've been feeling overwhelmed and afraid and this site seemed like a good place to start to change that.

I've been to two fertility docs so far and been told I have low ovarian reserve (ERS of 1, FSH 19.3)

Then I had the HSG and was told that my right tube is completely blocked.  They were unable to move the blockage by forcing more dye through.

At 40, I've finally married for the first time ever.  I've never been pregnant and we desperately want a family.  The docs are telling me that I would not be a candidate for IVF due to the ERS and FSH numbers and that a natural pregnancy is highly unlikely due to the blocked tube, or impossible if I ovulate on the right side only.

Does anyone have a suggestion?  I'm tired of crying and ready to take some action.

Thank you!!!


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Hello and welcome to the site!

I don't see why you should not be a candidate for ivf- have you been to one of the big London clinics for a consultation?  Think that's where I'd start !

Wishing you lots and lots of luck on your journey.  It's really tough but the support on here is fantastic

L x


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

Thanks for the reply.  I'm in the U.S. and so far, both docs I've seen here have told me that the blood tests and ultrasound indicate a likelihood of only collecting one egg for IVF.  They said that since this is no more than what is naturally released that there would be no point to IVF.  Both have told me that I am extremely unlikely to get pregnant by any method except egg donor


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## dizzie (Sep 24, 2013)

Please don't give up. I was diagnosed with 'below average' fertility (based on tests) in September 2010 and given a 10 month window in which to have IVF, which I was told was my best chance of getting pregnant.  I fell pregnant five months later naturally and then again in November last year.  In between these two natural conceptions, I had three rounds of IVF and none of them worked. So, I have shown, against the odds, that my one monthly egg is capable of fertilisation and implantation and that this is more likely naturally than with IVF.  The doctors cannot predict mother nature!

I would advise you to get started on a natural conception plan straight away, trying every month at the right time. Whilst your odds are reduced by your one blocked ovary, I see no reason why the eggs produced by your other one will not fertilise - it may take longer but it could well happen and indeed has with others. The key at 40+ is timing - you have to get this right because the egg may start to deteriorate more quickly.  When I got pregnant in November, I had been charting for several months and taking OPKs to pinpoint, as far as possible, the exact time of my ovulation.  We tried twice over this time and bingo!

You might also like to make a few adjustments to your lifestyle.  I was doing a lot of yoga when I conceived and eating healthily.  I think the yoga helped me feel very relaxed and got the blood flowing in all the right areas.  Other options are massage and acupuncture.

Best of luck.

X


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## barbster (Jan 26, 2012)

Hi and welcome to the website. You will find lots of information and support on here.

Your story sounds very similar to mine. After surgery to remove an ovarian cyst I found out that both tubes were blocked and only one ovary worked. My hormone levels were very similar to yours and i was told my local hospital fertility dept that IVF would most likely not work. 

After looking up clinics in London, the one we chose went down the natural cycle route for us, based on the fact that I would produce one egg per month, they took that egg and it fertilised using ICSI technique. We did a 3 cycle package so 3 were put back in the end (2 frozen and 1 fresh). 

I would definitely not give up just yet. I don't know what part of US you live but I am sure that there would be a clinic that would have this option available to you so worth doing a bit of research. Also worth looking for clinics that specialise in people with high FSH levels as they may tend to use different drug regimes. ie llower doses. I also took DHEA on advice of clinic which is recommended for low egg reserve and high FSH to improve egg quality as is Co enzyme Q10. 

We gave it a chance and although it took 2 years (I had a mc first time round) we now have a 4 week old so don't give up hope just yet  

Good luck X


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

barbster said:


> Hi and welcome to the website. You will find lots of information and support on here.
> 
> Your story sounds very similar to mine. After surgery to remove an ovarian cyst I found out that both tubes were blocked and only one ovary worked. My hormone levels were very similar to yours and i was told my local hospital fertility dept that IVF would most likely not work.
> 
> ...


Thanks so much. I was not aware of the natural cycle, but will definitely ask the doc next visit. I have also scheduled 10 sessions of acupuncture and Chinese herbals. My tube is blocked due to a fibroid that had to be removed and I've read that DHEA is not safe for people who have had fibroids but I'll check on that as well. Thanks so much for sharing. I can't wait to find out more about the natural cycle.


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Where abouts in the USA are you ?


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

dizzie said:


> Please don't give up. I was diagnosed with 'below average' fertility (based on tests) in September 2010 and given a 10 month window in which to have IVF, which I was told was my best chance of getting pregnant. I fell pregnant five months later naturally and then again in November last year. In between these two natural conceptions, I had three rounds of IVF and none of them worked. So, I have shown, against the odds, that my one monthly egg is capable of fertilisation and implantation and that this is more likely naturally than with IVF. The doctors cannot predict mother nature!
> 
> I would advise you to get started on a natural conception plan straight away, trying every month at the right time. Whilst your odds are reduced by your one blocked ovary, I see no reason why the eggs produced by your other one will not fertilise - it may take longer but it could well happen and indeed has with others. The key at 40+ is timing - you have to get this right because the egg may start to deteriorate more quickly. When I got pregnant in November, I had been charting for several months and taking OPKs to pinpoint, as far as possible, the exact time of my ovulation. We tried twice over this time and bingo!
> 
> ...


Thanks so much for the words of hope! I would be beyond thrilled if we could have a baby on our own without the aid of IVF. I have been doing the ovulation predictor tests for only two months and have yet to get a positive. My doc thinks I'm ovulating so my hope is that I've ovulated on the right side and not getting a result due to the blocked tubes. I'm on cycle day 8 today so I'll start testing again soon, and then be diligent about timing. And I will say to myself EVERY day, "it only takes one egg".


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

Louisej29 said:


> Where abouts in the USA are you ?


Salt Lake City, Utah


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Have you the option to go to a different part of the states that might offer more?  New York? Washington?  Have had friends do natural cycles as barbs suggested in both those places-  x good luck.  Don't give up x


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

Louisej29 said:


> Have you the option to go to a different part of the states that might offer more? New York? Washington? Have had friends do natural cycles as barbs suggested in both those places- x good luck. Don't give up x


Thank you! Supposedly we have one of the best in the US right here but I am rapidly learning that I need to stand up for myself here and ask questions! Can't wait to go back.

And yes, if we have to travel then travel we will!


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## Tincancat (Mar 19, 2012)

Hi 2Naughty

Have you considered a Tandem Cycle abroad?

http://www.dogusivfcentre.com/tandem-cycle-in-cyprus/

Try the link for more information.
Good Luck
TC x

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that FertilityFriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## 2naughtydogs (Dec 30, 2013)

Tincancat said:


> Hi 2Naughty
> 
> Have you considered a Tandem Cycle abroad?
> 
> ...


I'll open this link tonight. Thanks so much for taking the time to send it along.


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## dizzie (Sep 24, 2013)

I also had trouble identifying ovulation (at first it never seemed to show up on the tests) so I started testing twice a day using the Clearblue sticks. Also, the only way to confirm that you have actually ovulated is the rise in body temperature. So, even though charting only tells you afterwards when you have ovulated, it does give you a good indication of (i) whether you have actually ovulated, and (ii) the point at which you usually ovulate.  I got pregnant both times when we tried on day 11 (before this I assumed I ovulated on day 14 which is way too late for me).  I can see the pattern on my chart, so even when I don't get a positive OPK I know roughly when to try.

I have also heard of drugs you can take which give a 'stronger' ovulation but this is not something I know much about.

Best of luck - it's worth doing this now even if you end up having treatment later.


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## Debellis (Mar 13, 2013)

Please DONT give up, I tried for 4 years, went for IVF last year I did not even get to egg collection, they kept me on buserlin for 6 weeks...I was in tears they said I would NEVER fall naturally...and spent many many days crying and then suffered depression and anxiety an then we decided to go egg donor and go private, I had a monitored cycle and have now fell naturally, I am now 7 weeks pregnant, and worried at every pain....just dont give up hope


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