# Hello and HELP! Period Pain but not cramps.



## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

My sincere apologies for only posting when i'm desperate for help. I dont think i know anyone on here at min. I'm what the oldies used to refer to as a lurker! I pop in once in a blue moon but i like reading peoples stories. I'm just no good at all at keeping up with everyone as sooo many on here.

I'm going through my 3rd try. Have had 2 BFN FET's from 1st ICSI 09/10. This time i had EC 28th Feb and didnt overstimulate as they reduced my drugs to aim for a fresh transfer. I had my fresh transfer last Thurs 3rd March. No snowbabies   

I got a 6cell grade 3 and 4 cell grade 4 which i dont really understand as RFC used to grade A-D not 4-1. Dont know when they changed grading to numbers. (This try also still at RFC)

Since yesterday i have been having AF type pains    These are not cramps so i dont think it could be implantation? I cried so hard and sooo long last night i have woken up this morn with swollen eyelids! I am really struggling and i feel i am fighting alone as my husbands 2 daughters from previous marriage are here with us on holiday and one of them is pregnant (shes 29). All i am constantly hearing is how the babygirl is moving. Plus i see her constantly rubbing her bump. I want to be happy for her and also for my DH as this is his first grandchild. But i am really struggling. My heart is breaking. I cant tell him as i dont want him to be upset. I am desperate   

Anyone else had these pains? xx


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## DJCJ (May 24, 2007)

Hi Tearful
   
Sorry to hear you're so upset.  Its a really emotional time.  As regards the AF type pains, I hope you're not in too much discomfort.  I'm afraid I'm not sure what the pains might be, but am guessing it could be anything from EC/ET recovery (lots of poking around recently) to implantation. To be honest, although I completely understand and admire you trying to keep it together while your DH's daughters are staying, you must remember that you are equally important and this is a time when you need lots of support especially from DH.  I'm sure he would hate to think you were bottling up your feelings and feeling isolated.  Yes, its wonderful that he's about to be a grandad, but he's also trying to become a dad again, and I'm sure that's where his priority lies.  

Try and have a quiet word with DH today, maybe get some alone time out of the house for an hour and have a chat and get a little space from his daughter.
     
DJ x


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## wee emma (Nov 15, 2007)

hiya tearful, i couldnt read and run   

i agree with dj, have a word with him. this stuff is a heavy weight to carry and sometimes just talking about it makes it a lighter load.

xo


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

DJ and Wee Emma

Thankyou for your replies! Been going through quite an emotional ride. Ive been off work since start Jan with chronic asthma and a new diagnosis of vocal chord dysfunction - so much so that my ICSI was postponed by 5 weeks so i could take steroids. Work was being ok up until the fri before my ec when they disallowed my hols for ivf and told me i had to stay on sickleave. Union got involved yesterday and got my holidays overturned which was good news. But now i hate my work for stressing me out when i was already going through a tough time. Think with the pains starting and the 'timing' of DH daughters holiday and work overwhelmed me!

DH has been supportive and he knew about pains yesterday but he doesnt know how im feeling about the holiday gang. He looked upset enough yest when i told him about the pains i just cant burden him more. I am just trying to work through it myself. 

Just hoping a few FF may jump on and enlighten me with happy endings of stories with AF type pains   

Thankyou again for your replies! Sending you both best wishes


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## Sparty (Sep 26, 2009)

Tearful I had af type pain this tx and it turned into a BFP and I know I'm not the only one because I remember chatting on here during my 2ww and other girls had the af type pains as well and went on to get BFPs. I think Emma and DJ are right, you should put yourself 1st and tell DH how your feeling.. tx is hard enough without keeping everything to yourself. Does your stepdaughter know about your circumstances? If she dosen't can you escape to a friend or family members house who knows whats going on with you for a few hours to get away from DH's family?  Also try forget about work    hang in there pet and sending you lots of       and       for a BFP


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

Sparty

Thankyou! This is def what i need - people who've had AF pains but BFP stories.   

DH family do know whats going on. Their hol was planned a while ago but unfortunatly because i took ill and my stims postponed my 2ww has now coincided with my 2ww   . Although they know what is going on they certainly dont understand otherwise i wouldnt be listening to all the comments about the baby moving!

Wishing you lots and lots of luck and best wishes for the next lot of days! I see your ticker says you are over 40wks!


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## FitFinn (Oct 30, 2010)

Hi Tearful

I know EXACTLY what you mean...I had pains throughout 2ww, there weren't cramps as such but sometimes quite sharp pains, in my back, round my ribcage etc. In fact despite having got  my BFP (yipppeeee!) on 04/03, I am still having alot of pain & am panicking like any normal person. I even did another test today to just check ething was still on board. 

I'm not going to say don't worry, because its impossible, but try not to get overly stressed and think positive thoughts! 

I promise I felt like it was all over and the 2ww is hell on earth but its worth hanging in there! 

Incidently the 3ww after OTD is nearly as bad! 

I'll keep all my fingers & toes crossed for you 

Big big hugs 
xxxx


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

FitFinn

Thankyou so much. Throughout today i'm still having the pains and i feel low    then i turn on my laptop and i get a bit of a pick me up from people like you and the other girls that kindly replied to me on my HELP thread! It is so uplifting to hear people with the pains going on for a BFP  
i guess i'm stressing cos last 2 times i had these pains aswell but i got the devastating BFN's!      

I can believe the 3ww is near as bad. This ivf is one hurdle after another. Its like a great big steeplechase! I am sure even after the 3ww its the worry to the next scan. Then after that its getting passed the so called safety months. Us ivf'ers also have to worry bout the increased chances of things going wrong. Whole thing is a nightmare that hopefully we all come out smiling the otherside    

Sending you best wishes and   Hope your 3ww goes fine xx


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## Sparty (Sep 26, 2009)

Thanks Tearful, feel like at long last I'm on the final countdown - your totally right in this journey we just move from one set of waiting to another but hopefully this leads to our dreams coming true      

Pity your DH's family can't be a bit more understanding, it's terrible having to sit there when others are pregnant and they have little sensitivity to how your feeling - especially on your 2ww


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## wee emma (Nov 15, 2007)

coping with your feelings is really the hardest part. 

Its hard to find people why truly understand so its very good for your sanity to come on here and have a good gulder   

xo


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## Janey35 (Aug 13, 2010)

Hi Tearful, just wanted to pop on and say that i had really bad AF pains before my BFP, they were so strong that i was totaly convinced it hadn't work...so please keep positive and as stress free as possible. I have everything crossed for you...Jane..x


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

Janey

Thankyou! You honestly couldnt understand the differrence you have all made to me and my melt down!   

Sending you lots of    for your current pregnancy! xx


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## lgs30 (Feb 17, 2009)

tearful hun i had the most awful a/f pains in my 2ww i mean that id gave up hope my back an tummy but look at me now a wee man of 15 months take care of yourself hun an talk to d/h hes in it too its a 2 way thing yes hes goin to be a granda an that but his life is wit u too an adventure


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## betty-77 (Mar 13, 2008)

Hi Tearful, good to hear from you   

Try not to stress yourself out about the af type pains, they are definitley normal and i dont believe you can determine a bfn or a bfp from them.  Most people tend to get the pains one way or another.  As for the visitors they definitley dont understand, i dont think people can unless they have been in our shoes.  Just think of your wee bean in there and try and enjoy as much of this time as you can, its just too precious.  

i really hope that this is your time    

Betty xx


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

Betty and Lgs

Lovely to hear from you's too! And both of you with happy endings x  
Its been tough. Pains not just as bad as the night i had my meltdown but def still getting them. Just scary cos it feels like history repeating itself. I dont know where we would get the funds to try again if this doesnt work   

Trying to stay     but soooooooo hard. I just want my wee dream to come true- twins- a boy and a girl. I would be on cloud9 for ever    

Nice to see that the success stories still 'Lurk' too LOL


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## NCKB (Aug 10, 2009)

tearful    i had terrible period pains on the 2ww aswell, i kept running to the loo thinking my period had just arrived and one day nearly had a nervous breakdown i wiped and on the tissue it was like a peachy/pinky colour so i really thought it didnt work then but i like d other girls i also had a happy ending so hang in der hun and stay positive xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
nicola


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

Nicola

Thankyou. I run to the loo all the time. Keep thinking i feel a 'leak' but then there's nothing there. Not even the pink stuff. 
I'm doing my best to think    but soooo hard. Especially after this is what happened in my previous go's. Only big difference between this one and last 2 is this is a fresh transfer whereas last 2 where frozen. 

4 more sleeps till either ecstasy or devastation. Hopefully its all smiles


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## Tearful (Nov 19, 2007)

Its all over. Didnt even make it to test day     

Thanks for all your help these last lot of days everyone.

Good luck. Hope all works out for you all.   

Best wishes and lots of love


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