# Not worth trying ?



## Daisy1972 (Nov 11, 2011)

I am having a very low evening tonight.

I am 43 and have 1 little boy who is nearly 3. Tried to conceive a sibling for a long time and had my first cycle of IVF in January. It was a good cycle and I got pregnant but unfortunately it ended up in a mc (chromosomal abnormality) , I went to see my consultant tonight and he said that, yes I could try again but the odds are so low he doesn't think it's worth it at my age. Not considering what I would be putting myself through. 

Now perhaps I was a little naive, but I thought that having had a decent IVF cycle with a pregnancy he would have said try one more time but no. I find it very hard however to give up like this. Shall I seek another opinion ? I don't have anything that is being diagnosed apart from maternal age and yes I have in total MC 3 times. My thyroid is out of range.

I am really sad and confused, I know that he was convinced that it's best for me not to put myself through this again but yes a hard thing to hear.

Any ideas?


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## Tone (Apr 16, 2013)

So sorry to hear you're feeling sad daisy. Can I dare say that I'm not sure I believe everything doctors say. They after all humans and can't know absolutely everything. If I had listened to my doctor I wouldn't have spent loads of money starting Icsi and I would have followed her advice to not continue wasting my money half way through the cycle. If I had listened I wouldn't have my daughter. If you can, give it another go. You never know  I wish you all the luck xxxx


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## Talkingfrog (Apr 17, 2014)

Daisy - sorry to hear how you are feeling.  There may be a difference in opinion from different consultants depending on the results that they have achieved with older mothers. Maybe it would be worth having a look on the **** website to see if there are any other clinics in your area and go to an open evening. 

I had my first isci at 36 (two months before my 37th birthday) which was successful.  We had another go last year when I was 40 (and 6 months) which failed.  We have spoken to two different doctors at the clinic as we had a follow up shortly after, then another one a few weeks ago as we had decided we might have another go and there were other questions I wanted to ask. 

They have indicated that the chances are the same as last time - about 15%.  There was no push to have another go, donor eggs got mentioned as an option that would give better chances if we wanted to consider it, but they would be happy to do another cycle with own eggs if that was our choice.  I am 41 (42 in October) We are going to have an own egg cycle and our planning appointment is tomorrow.


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

There is a solution.  Let the embryos grow till the  blastocyst stage and then test  them genetically.  Then transfer the healthy ones.


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## Daisy1972 (Nov 11, 2011)

Thanks ladies it's really hard but hearing your stories always helps. I feel that - despite my age - my first cycle wasn't a complete disaster and I might try to speak to another clinic. We are in oxfordshire so maybe I could give the ARGC a go but worried it would take over my life and cost a fortune. Our maybe Oxford Fertility. First cycle was with the satellite clinic of the lister in slough. Our consultant said that testing embryos is quite dangerous but not sure if perhaps in my case might be worth a try? Cosmopolitan do you have any experience in doing that?
Thanks again for sharing your thoughts


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Yes, but i don't know about genetic testing in the UK.  We did it in the USA . My husband  has abnormal  sperm  morphology  plus motility.  So, we opted for it  in order to prevent  miscarriage s or children born with certain  conditions.


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## fififi (Mar 16, 2011)

Daisy - sorry to see you've been given a "game over" card without much of a chance to actually have a proper go at IVF. I think the difficulty is that most clinics say chances of conceiving over 40 are between 5 & 15% and sadly risk of miscarriage nearer 45%. I guess your current clinic are concerned that you might be risking too much emotionally, physically and financially for them to recommend another OE cycle as an option. However that said you did get pg on last cycle so have shown you can overcome those odds so now you've got to hope & believe that the next pregnancy is one that also goes with the positive odds and leads to a healthy baby.

If your current clinic don't seem supportive of you having another cycle then it's probably better for you to switch clinics. You want to be cycling with a clinic that believes you will get your happy ending and will do all they can to enable that to happen.
Oxford Fertility is in the same partnership group as the one I'm under in Nottingham. For my last cycle I'd planned on using their embryoscope which is basically a video camera put in with the developing embryos to monitor their progress and aid selection. It also may offer benefits in not needing to disturb the embryos so often whilst in the early stages of development although this hasn't been proven as yet. I'm fairly sure Oxford fertility also have an embryoscope. Using embryoscope isn't as conclusive as genetic testing but considerably cheaper and will give you a better picture of the quality of the embryos beyond that of occasional observations.

Other things to consider are having an endometrial scratch immediately prior to your cycle around day 21/ when you start DR. Also embryo glue is recommended for over 35s if having blastocyst transfer. Both of these additional treatments are to help implantation.

From reading your post I don't think you're interested or ready to consider donor eggs at the moment but if you were to find other clinics were also not keen to encourage you to try another OE cycle it is something to consider. Switching to DE isn't for everyone but can be a positive step when taken at the "right" time. There's lots of threads about DE on FF which might be worth having a look at including ones about using DE when got OE child already. (If you want to chat more about DE then I'm happy to help but I really don't think you are in the right place to make that step yet.)


Wishing you happiness in not too distant future


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## Daisy1972 (Nov 11, 2011)

Thanks so much Ladies

FIFIFI embryoscope sounds great, I don't know why it wasn't suggested to me in the first place given my history of MS, the Lister where I had my cycle seem to have it there too. I also had an endometrial scratch and was also put on prendisolone so aid implantation, I think that whilst I probably can get pregnant if I keep trying the issue for me remains finding that golden egg and not having another miscarriage, we don't know for sure the reasons but the thought is that they are due to maternal age and not great quality eggs. MY AMH is ok for my age at 13.5.I am looking into using an embryoscope and will second a second opinion asap.

Cosmopolitan - thanks for sharing, I will also look into genetic testing in more detail too.

Upwards and onwards - at least for a little bit. xxx


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## morganna (Sep 16, 2008)

Daisy, I had PGD
I had it at dogus clinic in Cyprus.
Not only did I want the highest grade eggs........I also wanted a girl.
And I achieved my dream.
Why not look into going overseas?
A lot of ladies on the dogus thread do a tandem cycle. Their eggs mixed with donor eggs.
You do have options. But not in the UK!!

M. Xx


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## Sabiha (Mar 5, 2015)

Daisy,

If you ask something to ten doctors, you get 10 different 'educated guesses'!

My 2 pence is...if you feel you should try again, do it. Live with no regrets girl  

Sabiha


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## Pnee (Jul 18, 2014)

Hi Daisy, I was in the same position as you are recently, and at almost 41 not sure if it was worth trying again.  I decided to go for a tandem OE / DE cycle at Reprofit in Czech Republic.  I would not go back to the ARGC as it is too expensive, and realistically the odds are still low, even at ARGC.  My idea was to have one last try with my own eggs (my last fresh cycle at ARGC when I was 39 ended in miscarriage due to chromosonal abnormalities), but would have the donor eggs as a backup in case OE failed.  In the event, the frozen donor eggs failed to fertilize, but all 7 of my own fertilized.  I am currently 6 weeks pregnant, but in a constant state of terror that this pregnancy will also end in miscarriage.  I probably should have been thorough and had the chromosomes tess before transfer.  

Anyhow, I thought OE was worth a shot, but only at the right price - the treatment only cost about 2000 euros + 500 euros for tests and drugs and the clinic has offered a much better service and standard of care than I have received anywhere in the UK.  I only had to go to CZR for about 9 days.  (You will find you have to take a similar amount of time off work if you have treatment at ARGC as they want you to hang round the clinic all day waiting for test results.)  If this attempt fails, then I will almost certainly chose fresh DE next time.  However, if I was you I would definitely consider looking abroad as the treatment is cheaper and you will have the DE option if you don't succeed with your own eggs.


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

If you will consider  abroad, consider Serum in Greece. I haven't been there, but the lady who runs it, Penny, is closest in practice to my dr. Braverman. She doesn't  leave anything to the case. I got an impression she is very thorough.  There is a link here about Serum  clinic.  Read a bit about it. Pk us,  she will not tell you to go for donor eggs unless you really have to.


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