# Update on what's happened



## KathC (Oct 18, 2007)

Hi

Just thought I'd get back on the board after a few months away.  Feeling down again and would be really grateful for someone to sound off to (you're always so great to talk to!)  In June  I had the results of my antro follicle scan and FSH and they were normal but another test was done and this was for a hormone called anti mulleria and is banded.  Apparently I'm on the second bottom line which means that the chances of conception are low.  In the words of the specialist "time has caught up with you".  He showed me a chart of the success rates of IVF and given my age (44), they are about as successful as IUI (i.e. less than ten per cent).  He was happy to go ahead with IVF treatment as I'd be self funding but he suggested that given a choice between it and a holiday in Florida he'd choose the latter.  I have to agree with him although I won't be going to Florida!  Donor eggs would be another step but I'm really not sure about this still and have to work through this in my head.

So I'm now trying reflexology and trying to maintain a healthy diet and do lots of exercise.  I've also just bought a couple of the books that some of you recommended last time I was on the message board.

I guess I'm really down because I've been trying reflexology a couple of months now and because my cycles are so regular I started to hope against hope that I might be pregnant when my period was a day late.  Yesterday I was getting more and more optimistic as the hours went by before it was curtailed by awful cramps and the inevitable bleeding that came once the physical pain subsided.  This was replaced by the emotional pain of knowing that I'd failed yet again to get pregnant.

I do so want to draw a line under things and move on and be happy that I have my son already but I keep clinging on to hope, especially when I hear on the radio about someone who's unexpectedly found herself pregnant at 46.

Sorry to keep on about things, wonder how everyone else is out there (i.e. Sue, Amber Choice 4 etc?)

Love

Kathryn


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## Sue74 (Feb 26, 2009)

Hi Kathryn

Good to hear from you, sending you a big   for the old   getting you this month and the feelings it brings with it, life can be so cruel.  Hope you're enjoying reflexology, it is very hard to draw a line under things, its difficult to accept what the doctors say as woman can and do get pregnant in their forties.  Look at me I was told I'd never conceive naturally (following bloods) by consultant and I did, so you never know, they don't know everything. Will   for you hun.

It is a difficult journey as the feelings never go away, everyday I think about having another child and as time goes by it gets harder to actually believe it'll ever happen, the physical and emotional pain is often hard to bear isn't it.  I had my HSG on monday, thankfully it showed everything was ok and my tubes were open, so just waiting for review appt with Mr Mustafa to hopefully move onto IUI, but things never happen as quick as we want them to do they.  Its like we jump each hurdle ready to move onto the next one   in  the hope that our dream comes true.

Theres a very small group of ladies who meet up in Stockton every couple of months, It would be great for you to join us as I find it helps talking to others who know what you're feeling, I'll email you when we meet next if you want.

Take care,sending you lots of     love sue xxxx


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## Sue74 (Feb 26, 2009)

Hi Kath

Sorry just realised you don't live in the North East anymore  , read your last post and that you were originally from Gateshead, so the meet up might be a bit far for you to travel  .  You can see my head is permanently in the shed


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## KathC (Oct 18, 2007)

Hi Sue

Thanks for getting back so quickly, so good to know that you're out there!  You could still send me the details of the meeting in Stockton, you're right, I live in Derby but I might still be able to make it depending on the days (my father still lives in Gateshead and I do see him fairly regularly).

How did your appointment go?  I'll keep my fingers crossed that things work out for you too.

In the meantime I'll plough on with the reflexology and try and think positive thoughts, as you say, you never know what's round the corner.

Take care

Kathryn x


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