# Help I'm new!



## Surrey Girl (Nov 25, 2012)

Hi all,
I am very new to all this and haven't a clue what I am doing!
I am 30, from Surrey. My husband and I have been referred for IVF recently after lots of tests. 
I have a low egg reserve, and the Dr did not give us much hope that IVF would work for us. 
Currently trying to get my head around IVF, egg donation and adoption and frankly it all makes my head hurt.
Would appreciate any advice / words of wisdom from anyone out there . . 
Thanks!


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## bizzyb33 (Nov 22, 2012)

Hi Surrey Gril
Have send you a PM. Check it out


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## bizzyb33 (Nov 22, 2012)

Sorry I meant Girl


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Hi Surrey,

I'm also pretty new here and still finding my way around the site! So far, I've found it really helpful and reassuring to know we aren't the only ones going through all of this.

Hope you find it equally useful x


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## artist_mum (Jun 19, 2012)

hi surrey girl and kellyloup

welcome to you both!  Hope you both find lots of people to reassure you on here.  It can be such a rollercoaster and as you say, there is so much to think about and consider that it really can be hard just working out what you want to do.

My advice would be to turn to FF when you are feeling low and also at other times to enjoy chatting on a string where you find some like minded girls!  It is such a support and also amazing for finding out facts and figures to help with your decisions along the way

Best of luck to you both and lots of    .  Good luck!

Roxy x


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Awww thanks Roxy, that's lovely!

I'm getting a little more familiar with it but I've no idea how to start a new conversation thread (i'm so not technical minded)!  

Other than that, it's nice just seeing what everyone else has done to cope with stuff and now that we've got our first proper appt, I'm sure I'll soon be using it a whole lot more soon....!  xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Hi girls,

Glad to know im not the only person awaiting first proper appointment and going stir crazy worrying/wondering about it all!
Im terrified and excited in equal measure!
Im awaiting my first scan (as far as i know everything is fine with me, but you never know what may come to light)
Does anyone know what happens after and approx how long it takes for the next step?
Love and luck
Laura x


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## Wraakgodin (Jun 17, 2006)

to FF, Surrey Girl!!! Have a good look round the site, post in whatever section you want and make yourself at home. There are so many sections here with a huge amount of information, so whatever you are going through there will be someone here to help you.

I haven´t been in the same position (we have been marked down as unexplained) but I can give you some links that I think might help you.

IVF General chat ~ CLICK HERE

Donor conception ~ CLICK HERE

Adoption & Fostering ~ CLICK HERE

South East ~ CLICK HERE

What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~   CLICK HERE

Our live chat room has a new member chat at 8pm on Wednesday. Here is our Chat Zone section which will give you info on other chats: CLICK HERE

Please feel free to ask more questions here, or on any other part of the site, there will be wonderful helpful people there to give you lots of support, information and cyber hugs if you need it.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.            

Sue


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Hi Laura,

I think it will depend on where you live. We had bloods and scan done and were told our first proper appt would be within 12 weeks. We've just got it through and it falls at about 11 so we're happy!
Scan is nothing to worry about (a little embarrassing given that it's an internal during your period but I guess they do it day in, day out so don't fret!)

Good luck, Kelly x


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Hi kelly,
Thanks for that, whereabouts are you being treated? If you dont mind me asking? 
Hopefully itll all be quite quick! Have you any idea what your next app will entail? More tests or more of a chat about whats happening? 
Do any of you girls know fully what your options will be?
Thanks for the reassurance re scan! Did you find anything out there and then or do u wait for results?
Love and luck
Laura xx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Hi Laura,

We're in Manchester so we're under St. Mary's who seem to have a good reputation- where are you at?

We didn't get any results from bloods and scan but that seems to be normal. We saw my gynae today who has now discharged us, but we got a bit more info from him... basically, if you don't hear from your bloods before your first appt, that's a good sign! The bloods are looking for AMH (I think they're the 3 right initials  ) so to not hear means you've enough to go ahead with treatment  

The first appt is with a nurse, going through consent forms (WoC = welfare of the child assessment) which initially annoyed me, having seen so many people through my job who have kids who are far from fit to have a goldfish, let alone a tiny human being!! This is a legal requirement though apparently to ensure child isn't at risk of neglect etc...
It sounds like the treatment will then begin either the next month or the one after, (this seems to sound like it's dependent on where you are in your cycle) so pretty quickly really! xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Hi kelly,

We are under st marys too  so will probably have a very similar timescale to u, fingers crossed!!!

Ah okay, think those are the right initial order, lol!!!

Do you know what treatment you are having yet?! Ive kinda pieced together our two options myself, although may be completely off base!


I know what you mean i work on a special care baby unit as a nurse and see all sorts. What do u do?
6that is super fast! Are you more excited or nervous?!
Laura xx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Ah great, well we may see you there!!! Did you say you'd got your scan date through?

Not sure what our treatment will be, gynae has only spoken about IVF but I think that was more as a general umbrella, rather than specific treatment- who knows?! 
How have you worked out which treatment you'll have? I'm not that smart (blonde!!)  

I work in a mental health crisis intervention service in and I'm not saying people with MH issues shouldn't have kids, but some of the stories that we hear are very grim, it's awful (sometimes affecting the service users, rather than them being the bad parents)

Do you work in Manchester SCBU? I have a friend who works in on of the children's dept    xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Hi kelly

Just awaiting AF and think its a couple of days from there, isnt it?

Yeah its such a broard term, i didnt even realise until now, lol!
Due ro DFs condition, our only possible options are IUI with DS or TESE with ICSI
Obviously there is variation and thats presuming i have no problems.


No i actually work in brum, have very split weeks!!

I know what u mean and its hard not to judge when they are where you want to be but cant handle it.

Love
Laura xx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Yeah, as far as I know (I just had to Google AF as I had no idea, I need to get my head around all these abbreviations, haha!!)

Wow, very split weeks- do you live in Brum then or here? It's going to be a way to travel to St Mary's if so, though I'm sure it'll all be worth it  xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Sorry   first thing I had to do was look up abbreviations! There are so many! 
Actuually live in Preston but spend a coupleof nights a week in Brum.
Its a pain but when i qualified it was the closest scbu job to home!

Love
Laura xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Bloody hell, you get about!!!!  

Nightmare that there's nothing more local, you wouldn't think that would be the case really would you?   xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

I know  

Its crazy, I will start looking closer but cant be doing with any upheavel atm, and i do like it here so may even move.here more permenantly.

Love 
Laura xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

I know what you mean. We're not from Manchester and I want to move closer to home if we do get lucky with IVF but my OH is pretty settled here and has good job so we're sitting tight for now and will face that "debate" and upheaval a yr or two down the line...!! xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Where are you from originally?!

One of the other posts im writing on has been asked to.move from newbie board so imagine we will too,.
So if you want to pm thatd be fab.

Dont think anyone is using this post besides us anyway  

Love
Laura xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

From near Lincoln (most people have never heard of it!) It's weird as I met my OH up here and he's actually from Lincoln and we have some mutual friends- small world!! That's why he's reluctant to move back- he knows what he left behind in terms of what it's got going for it    but I'm a country girl and am determined that our kids will be brought up the same way!!

I'll wait for us to be moved, haha- I'm such a rebel!! xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

I know what you mean.
Hopefully we will both get home eventually.lol

Hows everything going?

Im still waiting!!! 

Love
Laura xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Fingers crossed for you, the travel must be a nightmare!

Well I'm on Day 2 of Clomid  and feeling pretty rough so staying in bed until work tonight! Cheers AF!!  
Got another 3 months supply of pills which should see us through until our treatment should supposedly start (according to my gynae, based on us having our first appt in Jan). I'm not really one for Crimbo anyway, so I'm wishing it away even more so than normal just so we can get there and find out what the score is!

How about you, where you at with things? xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Oh dear, bless ya! Hope you perk up later!!! 

Well fingers crossed for your  app being in jan then!!!

Still waiting AF visit, hopefully in next couple of days then first scan a day or so afterr that! Never have a looked forward to AF so much!!!

Goung stir crazy waiting!!!

If you need a whinge about it all, im here! Take good care of yourself.

Love
Laura xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Yep, we've got our date (8th) so not long now- How is it possible to be so excited yet so frikkin scared at the same time??!!


Remind me where you're at, very early stages too isn't it? This is your first scan and bloods, right? 

Thanks for that love; same goes for you too if you want to vent/moan/share good news too!!! xx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

P.S. Hot tip!
Make sure your smear is up to date so that it doesn't slow you down when you get your appt.      When I had my scan and bloods, they asked date of last smear (I couldn't bloody remember, ha) so she said to either check it's in date or get booked in whilst waiting for first appt. I had the pleasure last week but it means I'm now all set!
Oh yeah and I found out that my cervix is really high up and tilted in the 'wrong' direction- much amusement followed as she was telling me the best positions to get into to help things along!!!!!    

xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Wow so soon! I know what you mean, think the process is terrifying but the end result is the exciting part.

Yeah thats right, 1st lot of everything.

Thanks hun, we shall get through it all one step at a time with alot of smiles and tears on here no doubt.

Argh ive never even had a smear, itll come up soon but just turned 25 like a month ago!

How are you feeling this eve? Any better?

Love
Laura xx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Yep, so brace yourself- once you've got your scan date, SMH say that you'll get your first appt within 12 weeks   We haven't had any results through the post which is apparently a good sign, so fingers crossed for you there too!

I know what you mean about smears- I bet you get a disapproving shake of the head for not having been before, haha!! I guess the way to look at is, it's all good practice for getting prodded and poked in the future!! It's also not painful, so relax there! Just make sure she warms the clamp thing- I went in this freezing cold weather and nearly jumped out my knickers (which were actually on the chair beside me!!) when she came near me!!!    


I'm feeling a lot better today thanks and work was relatively settled (bar a woman self harming   ) so that all helped. I'm back in bed now for my granny nap- these all nighter shifts kill me!!

How are you? xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

Hopefully it all gets nicer sfter the first!

Oh well, its not my fault i havent had to have one  

Glad youre feeling better hun.

Im okay thanks, just having waiting for a sickness review at work, which is all i need right now 
Ive got a heart condition so i have episodes related to it sometimes!!!

Wish me luck lol

Love
Laura xx


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## hopefulhoney (Nov 25, 2012)

P.s thanks for the smear advice   and im very impressed with your jumping skills teehee xxx


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## kellyloup (Nov 19, 2012)

Oh yeah, they definitely get better- I look forward to mine now loads and wish they were more frequent than 3 yearly....  

Oh bless you, that's not good- hope all goes well. Sounds like you've loads on your plate without all this too.
Hope I'm not being too nosey, but would your condition have any effect on your health WHEN you have a bun in the oven? xx


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## Wraakgodin (Jun 17, 2006)

Hello ladies

I hope you are all well and finding your way around the site.

As this is the Introductions area, we try to discourage chat threads from starting, as there is a high turnover of newbies joining who need our help to search the site for advice and support. Once the mods have left relevant links, we like to encourage you to pop into other areas and make new friends in similar situations to yourselves.

It's nice that you all want to keep in touch, so please have a look at areas such as cycle buddies - CLICK HERE, IVF General chat ~ CLICK HERE or any of the other links I left you, join in so you can stay in contact.

Dont forget that you can send pm's to each other by clicking on their name on the left hand side

Take care and I wish you all luck and babydust  

Sue


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