# Re:secondary infertility part 2



## jeanette

Thanks Deb!

Hello eveyone

How are you all?

My dd have just thrown a wobbley in the garden. All over a tennis ball!!!!!!!I think she has been watching Wimbeldon too much!

My af still hasnt arrived but I have those familiar aches!!!!!. Mind you since I have been on the clomid my cycle has been 'unusual' Clomid also appears to have helped my pmt. Very strange!!!!!!!But I have a very happy husband!

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxx

ps if any more of my friends get pg I think Im going to cry. I know thats selfish, but when is it my turn. More importantly, when is it all of our turns!


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## Trishs1970

Hi All,

Gwyn, I hope you are feeling a little better. As we all know, time is the only answer. We'll all get there one day honey.

Jeanette, what a lovely surprise from your dh! I'm so jealous! Mine has promised me an eternity ring on the birth of our first child, so I'm not holding my breath!!

Picking up our drugs next Tuesday for our new cycle - back on the old merry-go-round. I've got the old familiar excitement, but much more trepidation after last time. I'm just terrified that we're throwing money away on a lost cause. Still, at least this time we'll be giving eggs, so hopefully someone will get their miracle, be it us or the other couple. I'm certainly dreading the 2ww, especially after having watched poor Gwyn struggling through it recently.

Anyway, enough of my moans and groans, got to think positive!

We're off to Prague for a long weekend on Friday, so I think a little indulgence is called for before a return to temperance and prudence! It'll be nice to have a bit of time out to be a normal couple for a change.

Well, gotta go as I'm absolutely shattered after a 10 day stretch at work. I'm certainly looking forward to a bit of R & R!

Take care everyone, we'll catch up next week.

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

My af arrived today. Feeling really sorry for myself.

I have been food shopping in Marks and Spencers. Big mistake when you want food to cheer you up.

My mind must have been else where as I picked up 4 cans of cat food. When I looked at the receipt the tins were luxury cat food and cost 95p each. I think I will put the receipt in the bin before Richard comes home!!!!!

Back on the clomid tomorrow again. Dreading it as it made me cry last time.

Hope everyone else is well. Any news?

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi all,

It's gone a bit quiet on here hasn't it? 

Had a wonderful few days in Prague, but came back more knackered than when we left!!

Picked up our suprecur this morning, and start stabbing on the 18th, so back on the healthy lifestyle!

Did anyone see the little IVF triplets in the papers yesterday, the ones where they refused feotal reduction? They were so sweet, and topped up my positivity a bit as they were the result of a 5th attempt at ft.

So how's everyone in the big wide world? 

Jeanette, keep your chin up sweetie our turn will come!

Anyway, I won't ramble on, but hope to see some more posts next time I check!

Take care

Trish xxx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Its gone really quiet!

Glad that you enjoyed yourself in Prague Trish. I didnt see the papers but any positive outcomes are good for all of us.

Just finished month 3 of clomid and so far my emotions have remained intact! Its a miracle. 

Alexandra is getting really excited about my neices baby. She keeps dragging me round to look at all the baby clothes.

I have decided to take my mind of babys and look around for another job! You never know this avoidance tactic may work!!!!!!!

How is everyone else?

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi Jeanette,

It looks like we're the only ones left on here since the new part opened - is it something we said??!!

Glad to hear you're looking at other things to occupy your mind, it's really difficult sometimes, it would be nice if we could just have occasional brainwashing for the odd day!!

We're back to work tomorrow  so are busy enjoying the sunshine for one last day. Also the stabbing day looms large on the horizon, and while I'm looking forward to having another chance, I'm dreading the big emotional build up in case we get another negative. Still we can only try.

Hope all is well with you and the family. Speak soon  

Trish x


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## jeanette

Hi Trish

I think I may IM the others from the other link just in case we have all missed this new thread!

I cant believe how lovely the weather has been! Tomorrow is going to be even hotter!!!!!! Great and Im stuck in the office for most of it. Boo hoo!!!!!!

We have to keep trying. You never know what is going to happen. Dont let anyone take away that feeling of hope. I feel that we have to take each day as it comes and try and deal with the way we are feeling daily as well. It sounds really easy doesnt it? 

When does your 'stabbing ' day start and who will be doing the honours I hope it goes well.

Take care

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## Gwyn

Hi Jeanette and Trish

So sorry I havent been a good girl in replying lately but I have been reading.

Its been a tough 2 weeks or so since my negative. Trying to come to terms with being so close yet not getting there. Its so unfair. And then my friend finally had her baby (girl) last Monday and I seem to have these jealous feelings, anger etc. WHY WHY WHY cant we get there on something that is so simple for others.

I promise that I will be back shortly and will get out of my moods. Hope you are all ok.

Love to you all
Gwyn


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## Trishs1970

Hi girls 

Gwyn, it's nice to hear from you. I've been worried about how you were coping, but it sounds as though you're soldiering on. Don't feel guilty about your feelings over your friend's baby as they're only natural, and I'm sure they'll fade in time. Jeanette and I have still got our tests to come next month when "our" babies turn up, and I'm sure we'll struggle too.

Jeanette, my first day of stabbing is Friday (18th) and dh will be doing the honours. It cracks me up actually because he's got a really bad needle phobia, whereas they've never bothered me, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it last time so I doubt this time will be any different  It's lucky actually, because it makes him feel more involved, though I think he enjoys inflicting the pain too much!!! Obviously his needle phobia only relates to himself!

Not sure how long our drug therapy will last this time as we're donating eggs - I think it depends on how easily they can get our cycles in sync. I hope it doesn't drag on too long as it's bad enough without all that!

Dh is now saying he only wants to try once more after this, as he doesn't want to keep throwing money away for no result, so I'm having a bit of a panic in case it doesn't work by then. Hopefully he'll come around, as I think we should just keep going aslong as we can afford it  What do you think?

Anyway, managed to blag a day off work today as there are 2 other managers in, so I'm off to enjoy the   

Speak to you all soon.

Trish xx


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## Gwyn

Hi Trish,

My DP is also said that our last tx was our last one but I am hoping that as it was such a good one in respect of the previous 2 I may have to give in to a lot of sexual favours!!! to see if I can persuade him to have more. Though we have 1 frostie left my positive attitude isnt very good at present due to having a hatching blastocyst, if that didnt work - what will?.

We have our review next week with the top man from The Lister, am looking forward to seeing what he says, it may be that donation is our only way. Have read abit about the screening of sperm/egg/embryo and my hosp it just about to start doing that. so who knows.

So much to still think about. All I know is after seeing my friends baby I am not ready to give up just yet. We are still paying off last tx but whats the point of having money in 5 yrs time and being too old. May as well do it now.

DS said to me last week "why is it he cant have a brov or sis when all his friends have" . It broke my heart. 

I too am looking for a job from September. Have been working for DP for last 5 years and now want a change.

Trish - hope you enjoyed sun yesterday. am off to sun myself in a bit.

Jeanette - how long are you on clomid for?

speak soon
Love
Gwyn


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## jeanette

Hi Trish and Gwyn

Gwyn- its so great to hear from you. I know that you have had a really difficult time recently so its lovely to hear from you again. I will probably be on clomid for 6 months. Interestingly it was me that suggested it to my GP and the dosage/ time scale etc! However, she was really nice and spent time with me. Hope all goes well next week.

Alexandra keeps complaining that she has nobody to play with and its all your fault! God if only they knew what their little commemts felt like! Its not their fault that they dont underdstand. All of her friends have siblings so she cant understand why she hasnt!

Im really dreading next month. I cant believe that my neice is nearly 34 weeks. Trish I have a feeling we will be needing each other at the end of August!

Good luck from Friday Trish. Make sure your dh has a steady hand! The first time will be the worsed. Try not to look at his face (it may make you more nervous!). I dont know how my dh would be. Mind you knowing Richard he would probably enjoy inflicting pain on me!!!!

Sorry to ramble on!

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## saralou

hi everyone

have been reading this thread for quite a while so I thought i would post. I had icsi tx in feb-mar 2003. It was successful but very sadly miscarried at 10 weeks in May. I have 3 frosties and am hoping to start treatment in mid august after my holiday. I have a 10 year old dd who i love dearly but I would still like to start again (even at my age) only joking. Im a bit worried incase this tx doesn't work but I am trying to remain positive.

Love Sara.


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## jeanette

Hi Sara

Welcome to this thread.

My GP told me my age went against me (Im 36 as well!). 

But hey my sister is a midwife and the other day a 45year old women came into clinic.

There is still time for us!!!!!!

It is difficult to remain positive, but hopefully you can get the support and positive vibes from us. We all know how you feel.

Hope everyone else is well.

Its raining in Birmingham I cant believe it. Come back sun!!!!!!!

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi all,

Sara - nice to have you on board! I wouldn't worry too much about the age thing as you're hardly pensionable! Lots of women fall pg naturally well into their 40's and even 50's occasionally, so you've plenty of time yet. So sorry to hear about your last ICSI - I thought our failed attempt was hard, but it must be even worse to think you've cracked it and then be so unlucky. Fingers crossed for next time - sounds as though you're not far behind our new ICSI so we can hold virtual hands! 

Jeanette - didn't realise you were in Birmingham. We spent 2 days there after Prague as Dh's family live in Bromsgrove. We're hoping to move up there next summer if I can snag the next promotion at work. I'm hoping we'll have had a positive outcome by then as I wouldn't want to change clinics after all that time with ours.

My cousin's baby is due on the 20th August, and already knows it's a little girl. It seems to have gone so quickly - I was knitting her a little cardigan (sad but I'm good at it!) but I haven't been able to face it for a while, so I don't suppose it'll get finished. I should've known better really. 

Stabbing day is looming large now. We're going to have to be careful this time as my youngest got himself in a tizz over it last time - we didn't really give it a second thought but he was all worried bless his heart! So we're going to leave it all until after he's in bed this time around. He'll have a heart attack if I actually get pg, as he was desperately worried about how much having a baby would hurt me! It's amazing what goes through their little minds. I have funny days at the moment where I think I don't want to go through it all again, but I obviously do as I was so panic stricken when dh said he only wanted to try once more after this. I think it's worse because like Gwyn, we got to extended blastocyst stage with 4 of our embies, with another 4 good enough to freeze, and with that kind of luck you kind of assume nothing can go wrong. I really regret not freezing any now, as we would have had 6 on ice, but hey ho too late now. 

Well I'm going to go and try to make peace with DH - he's in a strop because I forgot to tell him I was finishing work early and he didn't need to pick ds up from the childminder! I said sorry, but you know men! 

Anyway, take care girls ^group^


Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi Everyone

Trish- hope you are all prepared for tonight! I think you are right living it until your little boy is in bed. They can think the strangest things at times!! Bless them!

My neice is also expecting a girl! Leanne has decided to call her Chloe.

I felt really sorry for Leanne as the other week the father of the baby picked her up (they are not in a relatonship) to take her shopping and in the car was a 3 month old baby boy. It appears that this lad has been rather busy with the girls! Leanne was devastated.

I dont knit so I have been buying clothes instead! Arent there lovely baby clothes around. When Alexandra was born there were little premature baby clothes. Nowadays there is loads and they are all lovely.

I actually live in Aldridge which is within Walsall. I originate and all my family life in Brum , but I think its just habit saying that I come from Birmingham. Birmingham city centre is approx 8 miles from Aldridge. So its very close! Hopefeully you will have a positive outcome before you come.

Hope you have made peace with your dh Trish. They are so funny at times!!!! 

Take care everyone

Love

Jeanettexxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi everybody!

Just a quickie as I've got loads to do!

Started the dreaded stabbing on schedule, Friday night. It's just as pleasant as I remembered! I've felt a bit weird actually, I was really excited last time, and desperate to get to ec stage, but this time I'm much more reluctant  I suppose it's some kind of self-preservation thing to stop me building up my hopes again. We've also hardly discussed it atall this time, whereas last time it was practically my only topic of conversation! I think I prefer it this way though, as last time was really difficult. 

Just to add a bit of spice to the pudding, my childminder gave us notice yesterday, and is stopping at the end of next month. I'm afraid I get a bit precious over childcare, so I'm now in a panic in case I can't find someone I'm comfortable with! It wasn't totally out of the blue as we knew she was considering giving up, but I had similar dramas 2 and a half years ago when my first minder went back to work, and it was a nightmare. We work shifts which makes it difficult to find someone who'll do the unsocial hours, and I have to admit I'm very picky  Hopefully it'll all work out okay.

Anyway, hope you're okay.

Jeanette - I know what you mean about the tiny baby clothes, they're so sweet - especially the girls things!

Sara - Hope you're still   and getting organised for that holiday. Mind you with the weather we're having at the moment, it's like one long holiday atmosphere!

Anyway, I've droned on much longer than I intended so I'd better shoot.

Speak soon

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

What has happened to the weather!!!!!!!!

Trish- I just knew that you would enjoy being stabbed! Only joking, Just dont fall ouit with your hubby in case he decides to get his own back! Its time to use all your feminine charm!!!!!!!! I think that you are right about the self preservation. Sometimes you just have to do this to protect yourself. I have hardly told anyone that I am on clomid- thats how I cope. My neice (who is now 34 weeks) and mum have no idea.

Child care is so difficult. Its even worse if you are both working shifts. Im really lucky as I work Monday-Friday 9-5pm (ish depending who is around) and Richard goes to the photographic studio twice aweek and works from home the rest. I remember how awful it was working shifts at the hospital. Its so difficult I really can sympathise with you both.

I bet you are not pricky , you just want whats best for your child. I dont blame you.

Gwyn and Sara- hope you are both well.

Take care everyone

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi All,

Jeanette - just sank in what you said about your neice's ex, and the baby in the car! (I know, I'm a bit slow at the moment!) Aren't men gits sometimes? Sounds as though she and the baby are better off without him. How's the clomid going? are they doing regular checks or do they just let you plod along for a while and see what happens?

Day 4 of the lovely junkie bit today, I'm getting used to it again and so far the bruises have stayed away, though I don't suppose that will last! I am being more careful about upsetting Phil, as I daresay he could manage to look innocent while "accidently" severing something vital!!

Told my youngest about the childminder issue this afternoon, panicking about his reaction as I would. His response was, "it's quite exciting really, but how are we going to find a new childminder, because I haven't seen any childminder shops!" I can't believe he was so blase about something so potentially traumatic but got himself totally distraught about the idea of me giving birth!! 

Had another "Not another one" day today, after passing 6 pregnant women within 10 mins of entering Tescos. It's an epidemic I'm sure. Then I got to thinking about how much worse it'll be in a few months, as the same women will all be pushing around new babies! Remind me to start ordering my groceries online 

Well, better go I suppose. Hope you're well and also Gwyn and Sara if you're still tuned in 

Ta ta for now

Trish xx


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## clairea

Hi Ladies,
My name is Claire, I found out about this website from a lady replying to an item i posted on the babyworld website. I know this is going to sound daft but i really thought we were the only ones that were ttc for such a long time for a second child, we have a beautiful 4 year old daughter and have been ttc for nearly 2 years for a second child. I too have relatives (most recently my mother in law) who keep hinting and asking about a second baby and it really hurts... Have had 3 tries of chlomid b4 xmas but they made me quite poorly, we have only been offered further treatments of the same and have been given a couple of months to decide what we want to do... I dont have periods at all when i am not on the pill so goodness only knows how we managed to conceive within 3 months last time... Its really good to share my thoughts with such a friendly group of people... 
Thanks for listening...


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

its me again! Hope you are all well.

Trish- glad to hear that the stabbing is going ok- bet your dh just loves inflicting pain on you!!!!!!!!!

I know what you mean about men. She is so young and naive. But hey werent we all at her age. I think that she had this romantic idea that they would live happily ever after. Then she crashed on earth. Its such a shame.

Very scarily (cant spell!!!!!) but the clomid has gone well again. Um cant quiye believe it myself. Its cured my pmt. Richard thinks its wonderful stuff!!!!!!!

Hi Claire- welcome to this thread. There are some truly wonderful people on this site. Us 'second timers' all know how you feel. I have told my family that we are not having any more, but thats only because I got fed up of them asking.

You have probably gathered that I have a 15 year neice who is 34 weeks pregnant. Trish has a young cousin who is due 20th August (Trish correct me if Im wrong). We really value the support from this site as times are proving to be very testing. We are here for you any time. Welcome to this fab thread!!!!

Trish- when is hubby due back!

Take care and goodnight

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## jeanette

Hi Trish

Im completely cracking up! You know the film 'dumb and dumder' well i'm dumber!

Why did I ask when your hubby is back.

OMG im so silly at times. I put it down to my cold.

Please excuse me!!!!

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Morning!

Claire - welcome to the thread.  I too was delighted to find FF, and have found it a huge help, as I'm sure you will now you've found us. This thread in particular has been excellent as sometimes it's uncomfortable talking about fertility issues when you've already had a child, though to be fair I've never encountered any animosity from any of the girls on FF. My dh and I have just started our 2nd ICSI, after our first failed back in May.

Jeanette - you're definitely losing it honey!! Managed to confuse me for a minute till I read your last post   Unfortunately I am still stuck with dh on a daily basis! (Wouldn't be without him really).

Currently having major panic attacks as I'm struggling to find a new childminder. Gave our info to someone yesterday, but she hasn't rung me so it's not looking too optimistic. I'm speaking to work about a condensed shift pattern this afternoon, but I doubt I'll be able to get much out of them, so it's a bit of a worry. Still, at least it's taking my mind off the treatment, which can't be bad. 

Well, I won't go on and on as there's not much of a positive nature going on at the moment  and I don't want to bring you girls down too!!

Catch up with you soon,

Trish xx ^group^


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## jeanette

Hi Trish

God am I dim or what!!!!! Im so sorry, but I did laugh at myself for being 'dumber'!

Out of interest where do you work?

I work within the NHS and I am trying to work 'fixed flexitime'. Its a bit of a long walk up a very steep icy mountain but I have been told it can be done!

Finding child care is such a nightmare. When Alexandra started school we made sure that the school she went to had an after club and holiday scheme. I dont know what we would have done without it.

How long will your hubby have the pleasure of stabbing you for and then what happens? Im very thick! I can only cope with the swallowing of clomid!!!!!! which I have decided I will take for another 3 months only.

Right i think im going to go and have a beer!

Night night

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi Jeanette,

I'm in competition for the dumbo award - just spent ages typing a reply, then deleted it before I posted  Oh well, here I go again 

Both dh and I are prison officers (no it's nothing like bad girls!), so work quite unsocial hours. Our longest shift is 0715 - 2015 and there are 5 other versions over a 24 week pattern so it's hard to find a childminder that flexible. Happily, the girl I spoke to on Monday has offered Sammy a place, so we're having a get together on Tuesday (Huge relief). Unless she has stuffed kids decorating her lounge, we'll probably go with her, as her little boy is in Sammy's class at school, which will help him settle.

Stabbing still going ok, though I think he hit the bone last night as my leg's been killing me all day ^shocked^

Last time we did one a day for about 2 weeks then 2 a day for about another 2 weeks before ec, but it depends on how you respond to the stimming and also where your af falls at the beginning. They also need to get me in sync with our recipient which may drag it out a bit . Ordered some "giant" uniform trousers after last time as I blew up like a balloon due to OHSS and couldn't fit into anything. It was a real horror story as I looked about 6 months gone, so I wouldn't leave the house in case anyone asked me if I was pg! I was also quite poorly with it so I'm hoping it's not as bad this time. Once all my follicles are ready they do the op to collect the eggs, then fertilise them with dh's  then watch and wait. If we get to blastocyst stage again they'll put the embies back on day 5 after collection, then we have to wait about 9 days before we can do a hpt (nightmare).

What will you do after the clomid if nothing happens before the 3 months are up?

Well, gotta cut this off now as my baby boy has just returned home from my ex's.

Catch you later

Trish xx


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## saralou

Hi everyone

I am currently off of work due to a foot operation last week. So at the moment having to rest, I am not very good at resting and I am not allowed to drive which is very annoying. My daughter olivia has started her summer holidays so at least I have got a week off with her which is nice.

Only 11 days to go till holiday, I cant wait. After all we have been through this year, it will be great to get away and chill out in the sunshine.  

Hope everyone is o.k. Trish good luck with the stabbing, I remember when i was injecting i was covered in the most unsightly bruises, but just remember it will all be worth it when you get a positve result.

bye for now.
love sara.


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## jeanette

Hi everyone


Sara- im due to go in for major surgery on my knee. I have been told that I should have an admission date by October, but it should be sooner. I will believe it when I see it! I have insisted that they do the op under a epidural! I must be mad but I want to know exactly what is going on. I have been told that they dont know what they will be doing. I just want to be able to consent to the best operation without having to return to theatre at a later date.

I havent told Alexandra about the pending operation as I know that she will worry. She will first know about it when its all over!

Im not going on Holiday until October . Have a lovely holiday Sara- where are you off too?

Trish- you can be dumb and I will be dumber!!!!! Only joking. I admire what you are your hubby do for a living. I feel that those types of jobs take a very special person. I am a nurse and for all my sins I am also a qualified district nurse and health visitor. I am currently coordinating complex nursing packages for adults and children within the community. 

Hope Tuesday goes well Trish.

I dont know what I will do if the clomid doesnt work. I suppose that I will have to be scanned and my hubby with have to do a little sample. Mind you he has asked to go 'private' so he can have a bit of assistance. Arent men rude!!!!!!!!!!!

I have been stripping the walls today. God what a boring job. I have managed to persuade Richard to take me and Alexandra down the pub tonight ^drunk^

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone,
Had a few problems getting on the pc since my last posting, my daughter has had a dose of the flu and wouldnt let me out of her sight and my dh is forever taking the pc apart to upgrade it 

Hope I get this the right way round... Trish your treatment sounds very painful, and i wish you all the best with it... Jeanette I know what you mean about taking Chlomid, i had 3 lots at the back end of last year but they gave me REALLY heavy periods  we got an appt with the specialist near us after 5 months of waiting only to be told that this was the only course of treatment as we already have one child.. they dont really seem interested in why its taken us 2yrs ttc this time and only 3 months last time... We have till sept to decide if we want to take this treatment, my dh is not very keen and we have hols planned for oct so may wait until Jan... see how we go..

Hope I havent bored you all too much and thanks again for the support, my boss has just had a baby on monday, my friend whos first daughter is 4 days older than mine is just about to give birth, so is the lady who waxes my legs not to mention my dhs aunties partner...
Could do with a good cheer up!! ^furious^


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## jeanette

Hi Claire

When you want to get pregnant you cant , but everyone else seems to be able to do it! i do know what you mean- I have two best friends pregnant, two people I work with, my next door neighbour and my 15 year old neice!

What I really want to know is when is it my turn!

It only took me a month to concieve Alexandra! I feel such a failure at times. But then I look at what I have got and realise than Im not, its just not my turn yet to get pregnant.

I get so pleased when I see the postives on FF. These girls really deserve it as they have all been through a great deal to get there.

I have also had problems with my pc- its called my husband!!!!!!!!!

Are you off any where nice Claire. We are all going to Ireland in October. It is such a beautiful county. When you go over there ( we have only been once!!!!!) Richard lives on steak and guiness! We had such a laugh last time as we both lived on 'toastie sandwiches' at lunchtimes!. They didnt do jacket potatoes or simple sandwiches any where we went. Anywhere upon our return we just had to go out and buy a sandwich toaster. Sad or what!!!!!!!

Hope everyone else is well!

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


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## Gwyn

Hello strangers,

Well not sure if I am out of zombie world or not but have decided to say hello yet again since neg result.

Hello and welcome to Clare and Sara. 

Jeanette and Trish - how are you both. I know that August is fast approaching. I am thinking of you both so much, I am still coming to terms with my close friends baby, though I have had lots of cuddles with her, I have found it stressful due to the tx and then it not working. 

Jeanette - how is your niece doing, when is the actual due date.

Trish - did you get your childminder sorted out. 

Its so unfair how some can get there so easily and others not, yet we have been there once why not again.

Hvae had follow up with consultant and he has told us to go ahead with frostie straight away but unsure as result would be when we are on holiday. Also advised us to carry on with further txs if unsucessful. And he wants to look for natural killer cells and antibodies on frostie cycle.

Am going to see what I can find on this subject. He says it is found in women who have repeated miscarriages but now looking into it for no pgs. I sort of hope to find a reason but dont. do you understand? I always hope we were unexplained so there was a chance I would fall pg then told I had dodgy eggs and DP and dodgy sperm (what a pair). I can see why DS is such a miracle. But we want another miracle. 


Will try and keep upto date now.

Loadsa love
Gwyn


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## Trishs1970

Hi Girls 

Finally made it back after a HUGE stint at work  Sorry for lack of posts, but quite honestly I've been knackered!!!

Clare - Nice to have you back. You should start making waves at your clinic by the sounds of things, as they should be offering you more investigations into why you aren't pg. If you read through some of the other threads you'll see there are alot of couples who have had baby No. 1 with no trouble, only to find out later that one or other of them has a major fertility problem and the first time was a miracle! Go back and insist on further tests or a referral for a second opinion honey. But in the meantime enjoy your hols  

Gwyn - Hi sweetie, how's it going? It sounds as though you're doing all the right things and getting support from your consultant. Stay positive - we'll all get our miracles one day ^group^

Jeanette - Bet you thought I'd deserted!! All is going well with the stabbing. Went for our first scan today, and should have started the stimming, but our egg recipient is lagging behind a bit, so we have to wait until Tuesday. It drags things out a bit, but I have to confess I can live without the extra stab a day for a bit longer  It's all working out quite well so far, as we should be having all the other scans and the egg collection during our 2 weeks leave.

Sorted the childminder issue out, thank the lord. Went for a meeting yesterday, and he's going for 3 "try-out" sessions between now and the 15th September, then he starts properly after that. It was a bit weird weighing up someone new all over again, but Sammy was ecstatic because he gets to play with her little boy, who is in his class at school. To be honest she could have been the wicked witch of the west and I don't think he'd have noticed 

Dh is in a strop as he got the results of his promotion assessment yesterday and he failed  He'll now have to wait until next year to re-sit it, and put up with a wife at the higher rank for a bit longer  

Well, on that note I'll leave you in peace for now. Haven't got alot on in the next few days, so should be keeping up to speed again!!

Love to all

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi everyone

Hope you are all well.

I have been slightly busy this week with work aand trying to get the house sorted out. The plasterer is in again tomorrow. Great (not!).

Cant believe that my neices baby is due 4 weeks tomorerow. Time has just flown by.

Unsuccessful month (again on clomid). Af about to appear any time. I have a big spot on my chin which is a great giveaway!!!!!!!!! Im going to sweet talk my Gp into combining metformin and clomid as research says that they work really well together. I can but try. She will probably just prescribe it to get rid of me!!!!!!

I have started finally a little wobbly about being with Leanne when she goes into labour. I hope that I can hold myself together. Im dreading it really. My neice has started becoming really worried about the labour, so I am having to give her loads of reassurance. 

Sorry to waffle on.

Im going to go and pour myself an extra large Baileys!!!!

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi !!

Jeanette - I know what you mean, my cousin's doctor has changed her due date from the 20th to the 8th August, which came as a bit of a shock. It's bound to be hard when it happens, especially for you as your right "on the scene". At least I've got the benefit of being 250 miles away! But I'm sure we'll cope okay once we get our heads around it. The way I'm looking at it is that we want our own baby, so it doesn't matter how many I see of other people's, it's still not ours so they haven't really got what we want. It seems to be working so far! Time will tell. 

Really proud of myself yesterday as Phil went out for the evening and forgot to do my stabbing before he left, so I had to do it myself ^shocked^ I just closed my eyes and did it, I felt soooo clever  I never managed it even once last time, but I think he prefers it when he does it, as it makes him feel all manly and superior ^cool^ It also helps him feel involved, so I suppose I can live with it!!

Well, gotta go and watch some more of Robbie on the tv. My colleague is there so I'm trying to spot him in the crowd but not having much luck so far, can't think why!!

Take care everybody

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi everyone

Trish- arent you a clever girl stabbing yourself! I may be nurse, but I dont think I could stab myself! Richard would enjoy it mind you!!!!!

I cant believe that your cousins due date has been brought forward. You know you got me thinking when I read your last post. You are so right these 'babies' arent ours we just want one of our own so they havent got what we want. 

When Leanne is in labour I have decided to put my 'nurses face' on to cope. During my nurse training I came very good at putting up barriers so that people wouldnt know what I was really thinking and feeling. I hope it works again. I have to cope and be there for her. After all she is still only 15 and has started becoming really scared.

My af has started so Im back onto the clomid.

Did anyone go to Stratford? It sounds as if they all had a fab time!

Apparently its going to be in the late 90s on Wednesday. Am I glad its not my fertile time!!!!!!!

Take care and sending you all a heap of baby dust


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## Trishs1970

Hi Jeanette  

It sounds as though you've got a good plan for the birth, I think you'll be fine  

Started our stimming yesterday, so now waiting to blow up to the size of a house!! DH is being a real moody pain in the a*s* at the moment, and making me wonder whether it's wise to bring his little clone into the world!! Mind you, I don't think this heat helps much  

Has your DH been tested for fertility problems? It sounds as though they're not offering you many options or investigations. It must be hard going from month to month with no real medical intervention or idea why nothing's happening. Maybe you should ask for a second opinion?

Well, better shoot as I'm dehydrating by the second 

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Trish

Richard has to go and have his sperm count done. He is so not impressed!

When his result is back my GP will refer onto the consultant that I was under when I had Alexandra!

Im on my last month of clomid. It hasnt worked for me, but it was well worth ago. 

I was told that the weather is going to remain hot for the next two weeks! Im finding it hard sleeping at night time, let alone baby making!!!!!!

I will cope during the labour and immediate afterwards. I think that I may just feel a bit woobly when I come home. But I will cross that bridge when I come to it.

Hope everyone else is well.

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxx


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## Gwyn

Hi again - its the slacking one here.

Hope everyone is doing ok. Though I havent been typing, I have been reading and thinking about you. I have now done week 4 of school holidays, where does the time go. 

Its so hot (not that Im complaining tho). I hope you are all enjoying the weather and long may it continue. Im off on holiday 2 weeks today (France) with a couple of families to a camp site, looking forward to the break.

Jeanette, I hope that this last month on clomid works for you. I took it for a long time, came off it, had to have a course of antibiotics after a PCT and then fell pg the next month. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

My DP was not impressed with having to do sample - so much so that it took him 9 years and an awful lot of arguing etc to get him to do another one. Blimming men - I hope it is ok for him.

I know the feeling on the baby-making time - Drs orders after review said lots of - but didnt he realise we were having a heat wave. Its bad enough doing it when trying for a baby - all the fun seems to disappear. 

You are such a kind and wonderful person to help Leanne. It must be so hard for you at times. If you need to chat then IM your number and I will ring you.

I was cuddling my best friends 4 week old baby today (her 3rd) and it still hurts that she was conceived as I did my 1st IVF and now 3 negs later still not there.

Trish - Your cousins baby is due today - thinking of you and sending you a big hug - it is so hard and unfair.
Well done on your stabbing - you are brave - I just cant do them, I am such a chicken - Have you dates as yet?
Let us know.

Well off to to bed to try and cool down by the fan.
Hope you all have a good weekend.
Loadsa love
Gwyn
xx


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## Fee

Hi Gwyn, Trisha, Jeanette and everyone I've missed. I've not been on here for a while - it's hard to keep up if you don't log on every day.
Gwyn - have a lovely holiday!
Just wanted to say (I'm naff I know) did anyone else read about Emma Thompson in Hello. Wonderful pics of her wedding, and she revealed she cannot have any more children, and I just SO identified with her. Her dd is just a bit younger than mine.
Leanne - thinking of you. I think you are Such a wonderful support - and so selfless. Your neice is really lucky to have you around.

Enjoy the weekend everyone
This comes with lots of love
Fee


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## Trishs1970

Hi girls  

Fee - nice to hear from you, hope all is well.

Gwyn - Long time no hear!! How's it going? No sign of my cousin's baby as yet, she's now 3 days overdue.

Had our second scan today. Responding to the drugs more efficiently this time, but not as many follies so far. I've got 10 good sized ones and 6 smaller, but it took me 11 days to get them to this size last time, but this time it's only been 7, so that's good as I won't have to keep stabbing for as long. They've upped my dose of stims anyway, as we're donating eggs and want as many as possible, but it's looking like they'll be doing the EC on Tuesday ^shocked^ I'm still being calm and collected so far, and not really stressing atall. I'm also on 2 weeks leave from today, so all in the garden is rosy for a change.

Jeanette - how are you doing? Sounds as though Richard is looking forward to his test! Phil was a nightmare when he had to go, and it took 4 aborted attempts to actually do it, but once he'd done one he wasn't so pathetic! They've got a cheek these men, as god knows we have to suffer much worse   My legs are like pin cushions and there's not even anything wrong with my fertility!!! If the treatment had been the other way around we would never have been doing it! 

Have to admit I'm pretty sick of all this  I was made for the british climate, not this meditteranean stuff!! The irony is that you end up with twice as much washing as usual, then have to bake for hours ironing it all   Still, I daresay I'll be moaning come december when it's freezing! I'm also now counting my blessings (?) that I didn't get pg last time, as it's no fun in this kind of heat.

Anyway girls, I'm off now. Take care and send me all your news.

Trish xx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone
I didnt realise it had been so long since i was on here last i have had 2 pages of messages to catch up on!! I have a free reign of the pc this week as dh on lates.

Hope you are all well, Trish I think you are being very brave about your cousins baby, my friend was due a week last friday and i am a little scared to ring and see if she has had it... Cant even face doing another pg test, as i dont have periods when i am not on the pill i do have to do fairly regularly as i was 20 weeks before i realised with Leah!! -- I know most peoples reaction is how on earth did i not know but I was very lucky and didnt get any symptoms the first time now every time i feel a little sick i keep praying!! 

Jeanette my dh wasnt very happy at having to give a  sample either, but i just sulked until he gave in!! He is not as keen to have another one as me and cant really understand why i am getting so upset about it as we live fairly comfortably now and I think he thinks this may change if we have another mouth to feed... Have got about 3 weeks till our next appt which I am suposed to be cancelling or re-arranging for after xmas as i dont want to start on chlomid just yet.. Trish maybe you are right about requesting further investigations its just the poking and prodding i dont like!! 

Speak to you all soon and good luck.. Claire


----------



## jeanette

Hi everyone

Hope you are all well.

Well Richard said he was going to phone pathology up today as he was alone in the house to discuss how to go about getting his little sample. Yeh right!!!!!!!!!

Why is it that men cant even do the most simpliest things in life without having a helping hand!!!!!

I have now finished clomid so Im a bit of an 'in betweener!' Im not looking forward to all the poking.

I think I may wait until after my knee operation. The only problem being is that they maybe going to do a big op which will fix my leg so I have limited bending ability. Wont that give the dr a challenge!!!!!

My neices baby is due in 3 weeks. I cant believe how quickly the time has flown by.

Ah bless him my dh has just brought my chinese back. They do have they uses dont they (only joking!).

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi girls,

Welcome back Claire, nice to hear from you again. I'm not really very knowledgeable on clomid, but it would seem to me that if you had loads of it with no result, then they should be looking at other options. At the very least they should investigate possible causes and then at least you'll have some alternatives to consider. Lots of luck honey 

Jeanette - Did he manage it then?!   They really are big babies aren't they? I think if the continuation of the species was down to the boys we'd all be extinct by now!! 

Started my new and improved dose of stims yesterday, and now spending hours staring anxiously at my tummy waiting for it to start spreading again! Not too uncomfortable so far, but the next week till EC will probably see a change there. We promised ds that we'd go to chessington while we're on leave, so we're planning it for Thursday when I should still be halfway human 

Still no news from my cousin, so I assume the baby has yet to make an appearance. I'm going to brave the knitting again later and try to finish the little cardigan I started months ago  (If I bottle it I can always nip to mothercare!)

Had some good news yesterday; don't know if you remember me mentioning my friend with the new baby girl, whom the doctors thought was blind? Well, she had her consultant's appointment last week, and it was a false alarm   It was a huge relief for everyone, as you can imagine.

Went a bit mad yesterday and bought a new iron for 50 QUID ^shocked^ We needed one, but it was still a bit impulsive. I blame the hormones!! I haven't even tried it out as I'm scared to use it due to our water being ridiculously chalky. My irons never last more than about a year! I've now got a friend bringing me de-ionised water which her dp gets from work!   I'm definitely losing it!

Well, I'm off now to persuade dh to lend me his car to take sammy for a haircut (Mine's being serviced). Catch you all later.

Trish xx ^group^ ^group^


----------



## Fee

Hi all
Clare - lovely to hear from you again. 

Trish, didn't twig that you were on tx - heaps of luck. Hope this really works this time, and that you get your dream. 10 follies is really good. I know that you need tx for the same reason we do. Are you having icsi?

Jeanette - thinking of you. I keep saying this, but your neice is one lucky girl. I hope she really appreciates you -and her baby.

Big changes are looming for me. I'm self-demoting at work so that I can go part-time in September. My dd is starting school, and I didn't want her to have to adapt to new environment, new staff, AND new childcare too. AND I wanted to see her for more than 30 minutes every day, so I've taken the plunge and I'm stepping down from my job so that I can be there for her. I can't believe that my baby is starting school. Where has all the time gone?! She looks so grown up in her uniform.

Enjoy the sunshine everyone - It can get to hot Trish - but I sense the nights drawing in, and we'll soon be complaining about the gloomy dark mornings!

Fee xxxxxxxxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi Fee,

Yes, we're having ICSI again, as it is our only option due to dh's poor everything  

We're expecting EC on Tuesday, presuming the scan on Friday goes okay. They're also expecting a few more follies to have caught up by then. We had 21 eggs last time, and need as many as poss this time as we're donating eggs, so fingers crossed for a good crop!!

Getting a bit tender in the tummy now, due to expanding ovaries, but not as bad as last time so far, so maybe we'll avoid the OHSS this time 

Anyway, better dash. Nice to talk to you again 

Trish xx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone,
I have been allowed on the pc again, my dh thought we would get the virus that everyone got yesterday if i logged on so i was barred, had to do the ironing instead!!

Trish, your treatment sounds awful, i even had to check up on some of your shorthand as it was all new to me!! The best of luck

I had the call from my friend today that i have been expecting to say she has had her baby, her other daughter is 5 days older than mine so it has been quite hard watching her get bigger and bigger but hey perhaps my turn will be soon... Am still plucking up the courage to do another pt... 

Fee, Good luck with your self demotion it is a big thing to do, i was a manager at Sainsburys until just over 12 months ago working part-time in the job that required someone fulltime and in the end i decided it was the job or my family so I now have a really cushy job working in an office for 2 business men, I missed the money initially but the hours, the flexibilty and the lack of pressure has made me feel like a whole new woman!! I have turned from a grumpy  into a calm  and really enjoy the time with my daughter. Its not to say sometimes i miss my old job but then i hear my sister and my mum (who both work where i did) moaning about the hours and the lack of staff and I know i have done the right thing.

Well, i am sure you are all bored to death by now!!

Speak to you soon
Claire


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Well Richard still hasnt phoned pathology! Why am I not surprised!!!!! He seems to have selective memory loss!

My neice still hasnt had her baby. Trish- any news on your cousin?

I have got my sisters little lad stopping tonight. All night Alexandra and Jack have been fighting! They are now in bed still bickering. They are like an old married couple! Please fall asleep so I can have some peace and quiet!!!!

Fee- hope everything goes well with thew self demotion. Sometinmes you just have to make these decisions in life. I am desperately wanting to cut my hours down but we cant afford it yet. I have told Richard that following my knee surgery I will be and we will have to manage. I hate being the main bread winner as I really want to spend more quality time at home. Mind you my job is fairly flexible and I am not tied to a building. So although I work fulltime hours I get to work some of these from home.

Dont I rabbit on!

Hooray I have 4 days off!!!!!

Take care everyone

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi All 

Aren't you all brave? I'd love to reduce my hours at work, but although I wouldn't class myself as the main earner, I do earn slightly more than Phil as I am one rank higher, so we'd never manage without my salary (or rather we'd never maintain our lifestyle without my salary ) I'm afraid I'm a bit of a luxury girl, so would probably die if I had to sacrifice my home comforts  Luckily our shifts are all over the place, which means that one of us is usually home before or after school, which isn't so bad.

Still no news from my cousin, so I assume she's still waiting to pop   Took little'un to Drusilla's Park near Eastbourne today, where at least half of the people there were under 6 months old  so spent alot of time fantasising. Still, it didn't depress me, which is a step in the right direction.

Phil says I'm totally disinterested in the treatment this time, which is not quite true, but last time he accused me of being obsessed, so I can't win   I am a lot more relaxed this time, which I hope will help the result, fingers crossed.

Got our second scan tomorrow, to set the date for EC. Really struggling to drink enough water, must try harder  

Hope all is going well with everyone. Catch you all later 

Trish xx


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## Trishs1970

Me again!!  

Went for our scan, but follies still a little small so have to go for 4th scan on Monday, with EC anticipated on Thursday instead of Tuesday ^furious^ Now trying to smile sweetly and stay positive!! Shouldn't have been surprised really as it was a similar story last time, but this time it all seemed to be going much more quickly. Never mind, what will be will be.

Hope all is well with everyone and you're coping with this endless heat  

Speak soon.

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi Trish

Im sorry that the news didnt go your way. We have to stay positive! (easier said than done some days!!!!)

OMG Im been and got Alexandras ears pierced. Correction, my mum took her as I couldnt! Alexandra had been nagging me since last year. Its nearly her birthday so I thought 'ah well its what she wants'.

Mind you I wasnt 100% keen as it meant that I had to accept that my little girl is growing up! She was really brave and didnt cry! (unlike me!!!!).

I dont know what her dad will say!

Hope everyone is well.

Love

Jeanettexxx


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## Trishs1970

Hi Jeanette,

My god, they grow up so quickly these days!! Mind you, I remember plaguing my mother to have my ears pierced at 5, though she held out till I was 7!! 

Sammy came out with a cracker today. He was commenting on how boys grow into men and girls into ladies, when I asked him how we can tell when a boy turns into a man. He said, "They have whiskers," so I asked how we can tell someone is a lady and he said, "They have big sandals!" I almost crashed the car!!  

Phil is being a git again tonight so I've left him watching tv on his own. Not sure what set him off, but he really is awful when he gets into one of his moods.  Like I haven't got enough to worry about at the moment  

I have to say that this site is a godsend for times like these, and you and the other girls are a great support.

Anyway, enough of my doom and gloom, I'm off to check up on the other threads. Hope all is well with everyone.

^group^ ^group^

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi Trish

Ha Ha- arent children funny! They say such classic things!!!!!!!!!!

Alexandra is 7 next month. She wanted her ears pierced last year and me being such a mean mum said no!

Men are such pains at times. Richard is fairly laid back most of the time, but if he has had a c--p day at work we all know about it! I put it down to male pmt. I suppose that like us they all have off days and men arent good at showing their emotions well. 

Love

Jeanette

ps Im off partying tonight!- its my sister 40th birthday. We are hoping that Leanne doesnt go into labour as her and her mum are still not talking and this would be the icing on the cake!


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## Trishs1970

Evening!  

Well, Phil's mood has now improved - thank the lord - so I have called off the hit-men! He's out at his friend's stag-do tonight, so I'm enjoying a quiet night in front of the tv ^sleepy^ Been watching "The Vault" and was happily spending my seven hundred thousand, waiting for my phonecall, when the girl went and won it right under my nose   Never mind, maybe next week.

Tummy is no longer painful, which has worried me slightly as it was last time. Hope that doesn't mean there's a problem with my follies. Mind you, I can live without the bellyache quite happily  

Dropped a huge b*****k yesterday. Was supposed to take Sammy to his new childminder for a couple of hours for another "try-out" session, but completely forgot about it until 9 o'clock last night   Rang her to apologise, but she was most definitely NOT amused. Can' t blame her, but still felt (unreasonably) peeved, as it wasn't deliberate, and we HAD just been disappointed at the clinic yesterday morning so I was a bit pre-occupied   Hopefully it won't cause a long-term issue, but it's one more pain in the neck at the minute that I could live without 

Listen to me moaning! Sorry, I'll try to get a grip!! 

Hope the party went well and you weren't too ^drunk^ I'm off to take a happy pill!!!

Take care ^group^

Trish xx


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone,
Had a bit of a rough week, Leah has been up at least 5 nights being sick last night was no exception... I managed to stave off going to the doctors until yesterday although he just said she has a bug and has to get rid of it by herself, poor little thing.. its very strange though as she has been fine in the day its just at night..  gonna see how she fares tonite before deciding if she can go off to nursery tomorrow..

I have to say I had leahs ears pierced about 6 months ago just before I got married (well i got mum to take her, i cant bear the noise they make when in pain, i cried when she had her first jab  ) and she has been fine, she cried for about 5 mins and was quite over it by the time i met her 15 mins later.

Just trying to decide what to do for dinner, not feeling very inspired ... Will see what the freezer holds!

Speak to you all soon and goodluck 
Claire


----------



## Fee

Hi Claire 
Hope Leah is better. Quite a few people (children and adults seem to have had the bug last week. She is the same age as my Laura! Is Leah due to start school soon? Laura starts in September, so life will definitely change. 
Jeanette - I've just posted to you in your HV role! How good this support is. How is the tx going?
Trish - sorting out the childcare is a nightmare - and the childminders rule, because what would you do if they let you down?? And it's always the wife's job to sort everything...don't you find!

We're busy getting ready for Laura starting school in a few weeks. I'm giving up my full-time job, and taking a lower grade post so that I can be there for her after school. It all seemed great when I decided to do it, but now I'm having "OMG, what about my career" type thoughts. I'm hoping the less stressful job will help me if we go for tx again, to be more relaxed - especially during the 2ww.

Hope everyone is ticking along OK.

Fee xxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi All 

Hope everyone is well 

STILL no news on my cousin's baby!! I think they must have had her dates right the first time as they originally said the 26th.

Claire - Hope Leah is better now. It's awful when they start school isn't it?   I'm still getting used to it with Sammy and he's been there a year now!! 

Fee - You're right about the childcare. At the moment the big row in our house is what we're paying ours for September. We normally pay a flat fee of £150 a month regardless of the hours (it normally works out far in her favour), but she only has him for 14 hours in September before the new minder takes over, so Phil wants to pay her an hourly rate. This is fine, however he wants ME to tell her, even though he pays her!! Men are such wooses when it comes down to it 

Well, we've got our ec tomorrow at 10am, so fingers crossed for loads of eggs and no OHSS this time!!   ET could be on Saturday or Monday depending on how they do, which may ruffle some feathers at work as Saturday is my first day back from leave   Well, they'll just have to lump it.

Anyway girls, gotta dash. Hope you're all okay and staying 

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Hope you are well!

Trish- I cant believe your cousin hasnt had her baby yet! Leanne is still going strong- cant believe that she is 38 weeks! Time has just flown by! Good luck for tomorrow.

Clare- hope Leah is better. Children are such a worry when they are ill.

Fee- hope I answered your question! let me know if I havent.

When Alexandra started school I cried! I also took her nightie that she wore the night before into work! How sad is that!!!!!!!!! Im not really strange I just couldnt believe that my 'baby' was now a little girl! She starts juniors next year!!!!!!!

No more clomid for me now. Im still waiting for my dh to sort out his sample! I cant do anything until he does this. Im being very nice and patient, but I dont know how much longer I can stay like this. Do you think Im being mean?

Love

Jeanettexxxxxx


----------



## saralou

Hi everyone

Sorry I havent posted for a while. Had ankle operation in July and I have just got back from holiday in spain. We all had a fantastic time.

Well I am about to go ahead with fet. went for a scan yesterday and everything seems o.k. This morning had to do ovulation test and now I have to wait for surge. The consultant seems to think I will ovulate in the next few days if not have to have another scan on Friday. It felt really strange going back to the clinic as the last time I was there was the worst day of my life when they told me my tiny baby had stopped growing in my womb. Anyway must not dwell on that have to stay positive throughout the next few weeks.

How are you all, hope you are all o.k. I will keep you all informed and hopefully some time next week i shall be able to post on 2ww.

Love Sara.


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi All!

Sara - welcome back! Good luck with the FET, I'm sure it'll go brilliantly for you this time. 

Jeanette - How much of a  am I?! Have only just realised you are our celebrity nurse!! It's really nice of you to help all the girls out like that with your experience, well done you ^thumbsup^ I know, it's dragging on a bit with my cousin isn't it?! I think she must be part elephant or something! Can't believe how patient you're being with Richard - we would've had about a zillion stand-up rows by now (and did!!). Phil declared he was going to do it "today" four times before he actually did - I almost killed him   Hopefully Richard will come round soon.

Had our EC this morning, which all went really well ( ^thumbsup^) Got 17 eggs, which was more than we expected. If they're all viable they'll be giving half to our recipient which leaves us with 8. They'll ring in the morning to tell us how many embies we've got  Now practicing my PMA and learning to walk with my fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes crossed!!

Catch you all later.

Trish xx


----------



## saralou

Hi Trish

Ive just realised that we are both at the essex fertility centre. How do you find them? I think they have quite a good success rate.

Sara.


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## Trishs1970

Hi Sara,

It's great to find someone else with our clinic! I've found them very good, especially Michael, who is just the sweetest man 

Their success rates are very good - 5th in the country - so we're in good hands. I'd be worried if I had to change now, but I might not be saying that a year or so down the line if we're still trying!!

Our only problem with them is that they're quite a distance from us (63 miles). It took us almost 3 hours to get home today due to the accident on the M25 ^furious^ But we chose very carefully after researching quite a few, so I can't complain.

How long have you been with them?

Not sure who'll be calling us with news on our embies tomorrow, as I think Corinna has gone back to Crete, which is a shame as I really felt comfortable with her. I think their new embryologist came from the Lister (London).

Anyway, good luck once again - hope to talk to you soon  

Trish xx


----------



## saralou

Hi Trish

17 eggs "WOW" that is a great number, you must be pleased. I have mainly dealt with William who i have found to be really helpful.

We live about 40 miles away and it takes 1.5 hrs to get there and thats if there are no hold ups. Yesterday we were an hour late due to an accident but they were very good and managed to squeeze us in.

My first consultation with them was in November last year and I started treatment in February this year.

Are you hoping you go to blastocyst, did you last time? I didnt I went to day 3 but I still became pregnant. Good luck for tomorrow.

Love sara.xxx


----------



## Fee

Hiya all
Trish - I can't believe you managed to post the day of EC! You are one together lady. I slept all day, then crawled into bed at home and slept more! Well done on 17!
Jeanette - yes, very helpful. I think I'll take Laura back and get the booster. Thanks too for your encouragement about self-demotion. I also think the lack of stress may help me if we do txt or FET.
SaraLou - good luck with your fet.
Claire - no post - you're probably shattered if Leah is still poorly. We're thinking of you.
Fee xxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls 

Fee - I felt fine after EC, so managing to post wasn't such a big achievement!! Last time I was really ill for days, and certainly wouldn't have managed to post then!!

Had our call this morning. We only had 8 out of the 17 eggs to work with as we were donating, and out of those 4 fertilised normally, so they want to do a day 3 transfer this time due to numbers. 

Sara - We went to blastocyst last time, but we started with 21 eggs as we didn't donate any, so it was a different kettle of fish. Part of me is glad we're doing day 3 as we did day 5 last time with apparently "top notch" blastos, but it didn't work  so I feel as though we should try something different. Then again, I know the chances of success are far greater with day 5 transfer so I'm not sure how to feel  I also had quite severe OHSS last time, so don't know if that affected the result. It doesn't really matter anyway, as I'm not going to risk losing them all by trying for blastos. I don't know how you bounced back after the m/c. I don't think my dh would agree to try again if that happened to us, and I'm not sure if I could be brave enough either to be honest. Well done you for staying so determined  

I've rung work and told them I won't be back from leave on Saturday after all. They've been okay about it, thankfully.

Well, catch you all later ^group^

Trish xx


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone,
Leah is finally better after visiting the doctors on sat and monday to be told its just a tummy bug, finally managed a whole nights sleep on tues after nearly 10 days! Although i only work part-time its still quite draining when you've been up several times... but all better now  Hoping to go to Wicksteed Park tomorrow as a bit of a treat for us all have to see what the weather is going to be like..

Leah will be 4 in Oct and as such because we live in the sticks she cant start school till next oct  and she really needs to, she is very bright... but nursery are very good and i have to say that we pay £250 which is very nearly half my wages so it should be good! i really like the months when the funding comes through as its only £100 then!!

Feeling a bit down just started a period today, although perhaps i should be glad at least it means my body is starting to function, i dont usually have any... Only got about 2 weeks left till we go back to the specialist and i will try and ask a few more questions this time, was to upset after being examined last time 
Anyway good luck to you all

Claire


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi Clare,

Nice to have you back! Sorry you've been feeling a bit  It's so difficult to stay positive sometimes.

Good to hear that Leah is feeling better ^thumbsup^ Dealing with all that has probably left you tired out, no wonder you're a bit down!

It's a shame she can't start school until next year. Sammy started when he was 4 and a half, and it did him the world of good. He thinks he's a real "Big boy" now as he's going into year 1 from reception after the holiday!!

Good news on your af  Now you've started the ball rolling there'll be no stopping you, just wait and see!  Hope you get some more info at your next appointment too - sometimes the confusion just adds to the heartache. 

Well, gotta dash! Take care.

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi everyone!

Hope you are all well.

Trish- how famous am I! Im also doing the health visting board (must be mad, but I never said I was sane did I!!!!!!). I have to do some serious negotiations (cant spell sorry) to get onto the computer now!!!!! Richard has now started avoidance techniques! What on earth am I going to do..........

Sara- great to have you back Good luck with your treatment.

Fee- glad I was of use! Hope you are well.

Claire- sorry to hear that you are feeling low today. I think that at some point we have all been there, so we know what you are going through. We are here to support and encourage each other through the good and bad times. 

Well Richard is in the middle of putting up Alexandra 'hi-sleeper'. Im really pleased with it. We got it from Ikea and its got 3 adjustable heights to grow with your child!
Im a bit of a wimp and I wouldnt let her have a proper hi-sleeper.

Take care everyone

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


----------



## Fee

Hiya all
Claire - glad Leah is better. 
Trish - yesterday had an interview with the director of embryology at our clinic. We've been treated fairly badly there, and she was horrified etc... but one thing she did say was that the blastocyst/3 day transfer, whilst it is getting hyped as having better results, she thinks my chance of pregnancy would be 40% whether on blast or 3 day transfer. Hope this helps. 
re the above interview. Well, devastating day really. I went for counselling but the counsellor quickly realised that what had made me so upset and unable to face txt again was simply that we were handled badly, given poor information etc. ANd she went of to get someone to explain - hence seeing the director lady of embies. She was helpful in apologising BUT of course not only can she not put things right - but I found out that instead of freezing both my blastocyst embies they only froze one!! WHAT! And they wont defrost one to let us do FET, so I'm left having to think about doing IVF again. She has made me an appointment with a very good lady doctor there, who will give me good information but I was busy convincing myself to do FET and now we don't have that option. How can they tell us we have two blastocyst embies and then only freeze one. You know when you hit a bruise - well this feels like that - just sick to keep hurting in the same place over and over and over. 

So I'm not a really chirpy bunny today - sorry to rant on. I'm so miserable.
Fee xxx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Fee

You rant as much as you like. We have all been there and are sure will be there again!

I just dont know what to say to you . Except Im really sorry and that Im thinking of you.

Life is so hard and to told that you only have one, instead of two must be devastating. I only wish I could wave a magic wand.

Im sending you a very big HUG .

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls!!

Jeanette - Can I have your autograph?!

Fee - Thanks for the info, it's made me feel alot better   It sounds as though you've had an awful time, and I truly hope your luck changes very soon  Just found out that the new embryologist at our clinic came from the Lister but apparently they haven't much experience with blasto transfer (6 months), so I think that may be why she didn't want to risk it. I don't know if your embryologist has more experience, she probably has if she replaced ours when she left. Our clinic's clinical pregnancy rate with blasto is currently 84%, but everyone seems to have a different theory on it.

Had our 2 embies transferred this morning, both grade 4 (top grade) one 6 cell and one 4 cell. I have decided to take the attitude that at least I am now pregnant, if only for a little while, which is better than nothing and gives me some comfort 

Well, my cousin had her baby last night at 10 minutes past 10.  She had a little girl, but they haven't settled on a name for her yet. They're both really well, and her mum (my aunt) says the baby is adorable. I handled it quite well, I think because we were going for our transfer today, our "chance", though it did take me a little while to get off to sleep.   Won't see her for a little while as they live in Yorkshire, which is probably for the best.

Anyway girls, back to work tomorrow   so off to relax for a couple of hours before bed, and to win the jackpot on "The Vault". It must be my turn this week!

Trish xx ^group^


----------



## jeanette

Hi Trish

I think your positive attitude is great! Well done. Im keeping my fingers crossed for you all.

Im glad to hear that your cousin and her baby are doing well. My neice has a week to go! I hope I cope as well as you.

We are off now to go and buy a carpet! How exciting is that!!!!!!!!!!!

Take care and hope everyone else is well.

Love

Jeanettexxxxx

ps I have booked in for the get togther in April. Is anyone else coming?


----------



## clairea

Hi all,

Fee - thought i would send you a  to to cheer you up, whilst i didnt understand all of your treatment i got the general gist and that didnt sound good 

Jeanette & Trish - thanks for the words of encouragement, will try and stay positive and hey i am on countdown only 4 weeks to go until we go away  going to my aunty and uncles place in southern spain with my parents and my sister and her dh so plenty of free babysitters!!

Speak to you all soon
Love Claire

Ps i have my fingers xrossed for you trish


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi All,

Thank you all so much for the good wishes, your support is much appreciated 

Jeanette - It must be the season for carpet buying, as we ordered one for our stairs/hall a couple of days ago! Actually we only have that one left now, as all our other rooms have wood flooring, but I thought carpet was better for the stairs in case one of the kids fell down them. Don't be fooled by my positive attitude, I still have my down and negative days, but I'm trying to keep some perspective this time to save me from  !!!

Fee - How are you doing? Haven't heard from you for a while ^group^

Claire - Not long now till those hols! We haven't been away this year apart from our weekend in Prague, as we have been trying not to spend too much when we've got all this tx to pay for. We've had a nice 2 weeks off though, just dossing! Also had a couple of good days out.  

Well, I'll love you and leave you as I'm shattered after the first day back at work. I'm on nights after this week, and have to do my test right in the middle  

Speak soon

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Trish

I used to hate nights! I hardly slept at all. I dont know how you manage. On the wards the lights would be turned down really low and talking was very limited! I know what you mean about high and low days. I was out with my family last night and I get so fed up of the commentslike 'dont have an only child' and 'Alexandra would love to have a sibling' I got very drunk (not the answer but at least when I came in I feel asleep and didnt wind myself up too much!!!!).

Fee- hope you are ok. You know where we are if you need any on us.

Claire- that sounds fab. Loads of baby sitters. Great!

I have just been and bought' Fried Green Tomatos At The Whistle Stop Cafe'. Has anyone seen this? Its a truly fab girly film!

Take care. Thinking of you all.

Love

Jeanettexxxx


----------



## Fee

Dear Jeanette, Trish and Claire - thanks for your postings and  - they mean so much. I'm still really down about everything, (see my ongoing post to Peter) I'm considering changing clinics if we have to do another full treatment, but we worked out our finances over the weekend, and if we use all our savings we still don't have enough for the downregging drugs, and this would leave no cushion for any unexpected bills (and with me going down to a much lower salary this has to be thought of), so I'm seriously wondering whether to start trying to adopt a sibling for Laura. If we went for a baby from Nepal my charity has a hospital near the capital so I could at least have somewhere to base myself during the process, but with Laura starting school I'd have to do things in a really organised way. WHY is money such a hurdle. We spent years getting the money together for txt - and now I'm over the age when we could benefit from this new ruling giving NHS treatment!

Ach well! 

Trish - congratulations on your embies - look after them and you! The Essex sound fantastic - I really wish I could go there. They would be my centre of choice if geography were no object!

Fee xxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls,

Fee - I'm so sorry you're still suffering honey.  You're doing really well at considering the options though, and I think adopting a nepalese baby would be a wonderful thing to do if you end up going in that direction. You really need to take time out now to consider what you really want and then go for it. 
The money is an awful burden, I know. Phil and I both have well paid jobs, so can manage okay, but I know he doesn't want to keep "throwing money away" on negative cycles. He wouldn't mind if we knew it would work eventually, but he sees it as money for us to enjoy later if we're never going to have our own baby. I can see his point, and the constant building up of hopes is hard too. He wouldn't consider adoption, as we have my 2 boys so considers that he's got that already.
I hope you can find the best way forward, and remember we're always here if you need us. ^group^

Jeanette - hope you enjoyed your "girly film". I haven't seen it myself, but have heard it's good. You're right about the nights - I absolutely hate them, but we get 7 days off afterwards, so it's worth it for that!  

Claire - Hope you're doing okay too  

Speak again soon.

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Everyone

How are you all?

My neice still hasnt had her baby yet. Alexandra is getting really excited!

Cant believe school starts next week. Where has the time gone...........

Still waiting for Richard to do his little part. Funny thing is he doesnt talk about it now! Think he needs a gentle reminder (or a kick up his bum!)

Im soooooo excited. We are off to Southern Ireland in October. Its so lovely there I would move there tomorrow. When we go Richard lives on steak and guinness!

Ah well no other news (i lead such a boring life!)

Love

Jeanettexxxxxxxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls,

Been at work, hence the lack of posts.

Well, found out yesterday that I'm through to the next stage of my promotion assessment, and will have the final interview on October 9th   So I'm really chuffed! It's not cut and dried as I'll be in competition with about 8 others for one place, but it's still good as I've only held my current rank for just over a year, so wouldn't normally be selected for interview. It's also something else to focus on as well as the tx, which is a good thing I think.

Only 5 days until I test now   Had a few little symptoms, but nothing major and any of them could be a sign of impending af, so who knows?   I'll just have to be patient   (not my strong point). As I said I'm on nights next week, which is kind of spooky as I was on nights when i found out about being pg with Sammy, so I'm hoping it's a good omen 

Jeanette - I'm so jealous about Ireland. I've always wanted to go, but never got round to it yet. Phil's been and keeps saying he's going to take me. Sorry to hear Richard is still avoiding the inevitable  Phil was EXACTLY the same, they're so funny. We had some awful rows about it, which I felt guilty about as I didn't want to push him, but he gave in in the end. I think they just don't want to know. Luckily Phil was fine after the first time, so hopefully Richard will be the same. It helps if you can find a hospital within an hour of you, as he can do the sample at home then, and take it in.

Fee / Claire - Hope you're both doing okay. Not long now till Spain Claire  

Speak again soon

Trish xx


----------



## Fee

Hi all
Trish - really keeping my fingers crossed for you.

My life is just plodding on really. No real news that will cheer.

Hope you are all hunky dorry!
Fee xx


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone
My DH has crashed our computer AGAIN ^furious^ and at the minute i am using one he has built for someone else (he likes to tinker in his sparetime and build pcs) hence why i havent been able to say hi all week..

Fee, I feel you need another  you still sound a little down.

Trish - I will keep my fingers xrossed for your promotion, it will do you the world of good to have something else to focus on and hopefully your 'good omen' will bring results..

Jeanette - Hope Richard has managed to overcome his shyness, I know Pete was none to happy about having to produce and then dash into town which is nearly a half hour drive, however it was me that ended up taking into the ward!! -- big wimp

I am definately on countdown for my hols now  3 weeks on tuesday, and we are back to see the specialist this Thursday although not quite sure what to say... We dont really want to start on chlomid again (at least until after xmas) as it made me sooooooo poorly last time and every single test we have had so far has been fine we shall see.

Right well with an incoming bag of chips on the way (oh by the way I won some tickets to go to the Car racing at Rockingham on Sunday so DH is  as its a special day to see f1 cars so having a nice 'free' day out - yipee) gotta go.

Speak to you all soon
Love Claire


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi All,

Claire - Thanks for the good wishes. Enjoy yourself today watching the sweaty men go fast   Good luck on Thursday with the specialist. It's probably a good idea to write down a few questions before you go, so you don't forget anything when you're there, as they do tend to baffle with science a little!

Fee - How's it going honey?

Jeanette - Have you had any luck with Richard yet?!

I'm a bit down at the moment, as I don't really have any symptoms to speak of and am fearing the worst. My sore boobs come and go (gone at the moment) and I seem to find my optimism coming and going with them!!  They all think I'm some kind of pervert at work, as I keep checking them for the current SOP! 

I'm trying to stay positive, but it's really difficult - you know what I mean  Sorry, girls, don't mean to be a wet blanket!!

Anyway, what will be will be, so no use stressing over it. Got the wonderful week of nights to come tomorrow, but at least I'll be able to catch up on my paperwork. Got my mother coming to visit the week after. She doesn't know about this cycle, so at least I won't have to explain if it's -ive.

Well, gotta go to work, so I'll leave you in peace.

I'll try to find my happy head for next time  

Take care

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Everyone

Trish- I think something is in the air. I feel really low today. I suppose its the realisation that my fertility problems are not as simple as I hoped. I just felt that a quick shot of clomid and everything will be ok.

Or is it my family?? I had a phonecall last night to say that my other neice is running away from home. I do feel that she may just be after a bit of attention as her sisters' baby was due yesturday. Afterall, if you are going to run away you just do it, and not tell pepole that you are sleeping in a field and running away today. I have sent her a text message and left a message on her answe phone. I dont want her to think that the only way to get people to take notice of her is to do something drastic. Dont ask me about her parents.......
Richard and I had words about my family and all he kept saying is whats her parents doing or its not your problem. I just said that instead of having a go at me about my family maybe a bit of support wouldnt go a miss. Am I being selfish? As I then said that I would do whatever to help my neices (including his side of the family).

My af is due next week as well. Im just hoping that the last cycle of clomid has worked. But at this point its just wishful thinking. I really hope Leanne doesnt go into labour. Mind you it will pull me out of the 'I feel sorry for myself mood!.

Richard has said that he is going to phone the hospital next when when Alexandra is back at school. Thats fair enough. He is being really nice to me today- guilty conscious I feel!

Sorry to off load on you all, but I know that you know how I feel. Really sorry........

I promise to be more cheerful next time I post.

Trish- Im keeping my fingers tightly crossed for you.

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone,

Jeanette & Trish have a big  to cheer you both up, for some absurd reason i feel quite cheery today, must have been all of those hansome F1 drivers (and Jay-Kay too!!) although its been quite nice to have my dh home for a day, he has been working really hard recently to try and pay a few bills!!

Have spent a couple of nights worrying about our trip to the docs on Thurs, Pete is also on nights this week which makes him grumpy anyway so will have to try and broach the subject when he is in a good mood, i think i have decided that since i have had 2 afs in the 3 months since we saw him last that i might be tempted to start the chlomid again at the end of Oct after we have been seaside, Pete is just not very keen as he could see how poorly i was last time and I still think part of him is quite happy just having Leah... Me on the other hand wants a little playmate for her, and after seeing my friends 3 week old baby this week the desire has just got stronger or is it the thought of turning 30 at the end of the year  I always said if i was going to have another i would do it before then, but hey things never quite turn out as you wish do they!

Well, better go before i bore you all to sleep.
Love & smiles for those that need them 
Claire


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls,

Thanks for the good wishes 

Jeanette - So sorry to hear about your latest heartache in the family  Kids are such worries, it makes you wonder why we all want them so much!   Hope things have settled down a bit, and you and Richard are okay. I'm sure he's just worried about you taking on so much stress, and that's what makes him annoyed. Men are bloody awful about saying what they really mean. 

Claire - Glad to hear you're doing well!   Sounds as though you enjoyed the F1. Hope you managed to have a productive chat about the treatment. It's so weird that we girls are so physically programmed to want children, when men often seem to be able to take it or leave it  I think it's because they like to be in control, and would rather opt out altogether if they're not.

I'm still not feeling too optimistic. Sore boobs have completely gone, and I have to say I don't feel any different from normal.  Mind you, I didn't have any symptoms with the boys until I started being sick at about 8 weeks, but then I wasn't really looking for any then. I also think it's not a good sign that my nipples were sore for a while, but then weren't, as that's what happened last time.

Well, I'll know in 2 days anyway, one way or another. I'm really worried that Phil will want to stop if we get another -ive, as he hates all the constant disappoinment. The thought of going through it all again doesn't fill me with joy either, but I don't think I can give up yet.

Anyway, hope you're all okay, including Fee if you're reading!

Speak soon 

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Trish

Have you got something to announce

Love

Jeanettexxx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi Jeanette,

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Can you believe it?! I got a positive!!     It still hasn't sunk in, but I'm already panicking about the scan!

Thanks for your IM, which I've sent a reply to.

Can't stay as I have to get ready for work, but wanted to say thank you to you all for your support, it means alot.

Catch you all soon, when I'm down off the ceiling!!

Trish xx


----------



## jeanette

Hi Trish

I know that I have already sent you an IM but.....

CONGRATULATIONS







Im sooooooo pleased for you all!

Love

Jeanettexxxx


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone

Trish CONGRATULATIONS    its great to hear your news, just ensure you take it easy and and hope the scan goes well..

Jeanette - hows things with you?? has your neice had the  yet??

Just a quick one tonite as the computer is now all better so i have a stack of emails to send... Off to see the doctor tomorrow and 'we' have agreed to start the chlomid again after our hols rather than waiting till after xmas although i am going to ask if there are any further investigations...
I know what you mean about 'blokes' not being as interested about having children i think if it was left to Pete he would just carry on as we are, whilst i just keep longing..
anyway gonna go Love to all
Claire


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi All,

Well tonight will be my 5th night shift out of 7, so I'm absolutely knackered! Can't go to bed till 0930 as I have to take Sammy to school, then have to be up by 1430 to pick him up   Something tells me I'm going to be in a bit of a mood this evening! Never mind, I'm the boss so I can get away with it!! Had a horrendous night on Wednesday as we had a death in custody, so spent the night with police, SOCO, coroners etc, it was a nightmare!  

Well still haven't really got used to my good news. I did another test yesterday, and had a minor coronary when it looked as though it was negative, but I just checked it too early! It was darker this time, but Phil still wants me to test next week to be certain! I'm going to wait till Tuesday when I'll be back in a normal routine.

My mother is coming down next week, and we agreed not to tell anyone in the family until we've had the scan on the 23rd, but it's going to kill me keeping it quiet 

Have now exchanged the "will it work" worries for the "what if something goes wrong" version, which I think is actually worse   I'll be so relieved when we've had the scan and passed the 12 week mark.

Jeanette - any sign of Leanne's baby yet? And has her sister calmed down and come home?

Claire - How did it go with the doctor? Try not to get wound up with your dh, it's a bloke thing they can't help it.  Phil's been driving me nuts as after the initial excitement when we did the test, he's acting like nothing's happened! I think it's just his self-preservation mechanism until we're sure everything is okay, but they are annoying ^furious^

Well, I'm off to change out of my uniform before I go to school. Catch you all again soon.

Trish xx


----------



## dee123

hi all
my name ie dee. i have a son who is 14yr today, from ex marrage. I have just started my first ivf with icsi today with my dh.
tomorrow is the first day i have to do that needle myself tomorrow. its al very scary


----------



## clairea

Hi Everyone,

Hello to you to Dee, welcome to FF, i am a fairly new member myself and have had lots of support and encouragement from everyone (esp Trish & Jeanette) I have a 4 year old daughter and have been ttc for a 2nd child for 2 years... Just decided to give chlomid another go have already had a course of 3 so my tx is not as painful as anyone else round here, but its nice to 'talk' to others who are facing the same questions from family and friends etc about when are you gonna have another one..

Trish - hope you arent too much of a  tonite, i can sympathise entirely as Pete is on his 5/6 night and has been really tired this week. After all of my moaning about my dh he was really supportive at the hospital yesterday, i think it started because we missed our appt!! I had it in my head that it was at 4.10 and when we were on our way i just happened to glance in my diary and we should have been there at 2.50  but when i rang them they were great and got us in anyway. The doctor is still hopeful that we will conceive with chlomid so we have decided to give it another shot (as you prob read above) but not until after we have been seaside... The doc also said i need to have a blood test on day 22 but like an idiot i forgot to ask him, how we get the results and what happens if things arent how he would expect   but i have another appt for Jan to give us a couple of trys and a couple of tests before then.. so hey

Well, i am sure i have bored you all  so off I go... 

Claire

Ps. Hi Jeanette if you are around hope things are ok with you
Jeanette -


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi girls,

Dee - Welcome aboard!! It's nice to have someone new - it's often easier to chat about tx on this thread as alot of the other threads have girls who haven't had any children before, and although they are still all great you can feel a little guilty   Sounds as though you're in a similar situation to me, I have 2 boys (15 & 5) from my 1st marriage, and my husband and I have been ttc for 2 years due to his low sperm count, poor motility etc. Had our first ICSI in May which failed, but had our second last month a we just got a positive!!   Still trying to get our heads round it, and panicking in case it all goes wrong   Try not to worry about the injections, it's amazing how quickly you get used to it. Lots and lots of luck 

Claire - Sounds as though it all went well with the doctor, despite your late arrival!!   You sound really positive, which is excellent. Hope the nasty stuff doesn't make you ^puke^ again!!

Last night went okay, surprisingly, as it was really quiet. Only 2 more to go till life returns to normal - can't wait  

Well, my brother is supposed to be ringing me from France, so I'd better get off the net! (He's on holiday). Speak again soon.

Trish xx


----------



## dee123

hi all
thank you for your support i did my injection today myself not to bad but tomorrow i will have to do the two. 
how do thay make you feel any bad side effect. This is all so new to me as I only had my appointment on thursday, which was my birthday and started the injections on friday  we had to work quickly as dh works away. 

trish its great you have a positive, i suppose the worry does not stop it just changes but with a big smile. 

Do most girls on here tell their family and friends , we have only told one friend , we do not know if we would like to tell them or not. 
deexx


----------



## Trishs1970

Hi Dee,

I didn't have any side effects from the drugs other than very occasional hot flushes and loads of bruises!! Mind you, I think some people have more symptoms, but if you're already on to the 2 a day with no side-effects you'll probably escape them!

We told everyone on our first cycle, but found it really difficult when it failed, so decided to pretty much keep it to ourselves this time until after the first scan, so none of our families know yet!! I can't wait to tell them, and probably would have by now, but Phil is still being Mr Cautious so I've managed to resist so far. Mind you, my mother is down tomorrow for the week so it'll be a real strain keeping quiet  

The one problem we did have last time was OHSS, which was really quite painful and scary. You can help avoid this by drinking at least 3 litres of water a day when you're coming up to EC and keep it up afterwards too.

Hope all that doesn't terrify you too much!! You might want to have a look at the cycle buddies board for September if you haven't already, as you'll find girls on there who are going through their treatment at the same time as you. I found it really supportive ^group^

Well last night tonight  I'm soooo relieved! Can't wait to get back to normal!!

Off to get something to eat now, as I feel a little queasy. Speak soon. Hope everyone else is okay.

Trish xx


----------



## dee123

hi trish
thanks for you support it was very hard doing the two injections, i am such a baby. i feel very tired and not realy with it, not sleeping much either. i think it a mixs of excitment and being scared. you can't help building yourself up and it could be a very big fall.

hope you are feeling well 
all the best 
dee
.


----------



## Trishs1970

Morning!! 

Thank god it's over, no more horrible night shifts for me for a while  

Dee - Well done you for managing the injections by yourself - I had to get dh to do them as I was too much of a chicken! Going through the treatment is extremely emotional, and like a constant roller-coaster ride, and unfortunately there are no guarantees. I was devastated when our first attempt didn't work, and initially dh refused to try again, but look at us now!!! You are already so strong and committed to even attempt the treatment, so you will be fine and hopefully one day soon you will be celebrating your very own  Did you have a look on the cycle buddies thread yet? It will probably be a great help to you as all the girls know what you're going through and some will be testing on or around the same day.

Anyway, take care of yourself honey, and if you want to ask any questions or just need a shoulder you can always give me a shout 

Claire / Jeanette - How's it going strangers? What's new in your lives at the moment?

Fee - How are you doing? Haven't heard from you for a while, hope you're okay and keeping 

Speak to you all again soon ^group^

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Sorry that I havent been around. I have had a bit of an emotional wobbly time. I needed some 'time out'.

My neice had her baby Thursday night. She was born by emergency section as she got 'stuck' amongst other things. At one point it didnt look good for the baby. She weighed in at 9lb!. I went into the operating theatre with her and I found it really upsetting (I may be a nurse but its very different when its family)

I didnt have any sleep for nearly 48 hours and my neice was very emotionally draining during the non progressing labour. I was so tired.

To make things worse Alexandra has done nothing but go on about having a brother or sister. I know that she doesnt understand, but I had already been feeling a 'failure' and this made it worse. Im not crying as much so I know Im getting emotionally stronger. I now need to get back onto track with what I need to do.

I hope you are all well and thank you all for your support. How are you all doing?

Love

Jeanettexxx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone,

Not much happening this end, had a bit of a rough weekend with Leah she has been sent to bed early every night for the last 3 nights, sometimes i wonder why i want another!!  Then i keep thinking that perhaps if she had someone to play with she wouldnt be so bored with me and her dad and not play up  

Jeanette - you have been so brave going through all of the birth with your niece a big  coming your way though, I am sure Alexander is just excited about the babe, our time will come.. I have to confess to getting very broody today when we bumped into my friend at the park (her daughter is 5 days older than Leah) and she has a 3 wk old  boy, just kept gazing into his pram and wishing... got another few weeks though till i can start the chlomid although i keep hoping that a nice relaxing hols might do the trick without!!

Trish - Glad you have finished your nights, do you work a set of shifts?? My fella works a 5 week rota and was overjoyed when i pointed out that that is what he goes back on after hols  Hope you are taking it easy and enjoying your pregnancy

Dee - Hi, I dont envy you with the injections I am a right wuss when it comes to anything like that, i even dread having my blood taken and end up taking pain killers to have my legs waxed  you are so brave, glad my treatment is at the moment only tablets!!

Well, bye to everyone for tonite and a special ^group^ for Jeanette
Love Claire


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## Trishs1970

Hi all,

Jeanette - Sorry to hear of your upsetting time. You've really been through the mill  Like everyone says though, you should give yourself a pat on the back for being there for Leanne, not just for the birth but right through the pregnancy. I know it's hard to deal with Alexandra at the moment, but as Deborah said, the novelty will wear off, probably right about the time you find out you're pregnant!!! Sammy is the opposite, and we aren't even planning on telling him until about half way through as I'm sure he'll be devastated. He's quite happy being Mummy's baby! You can perhaps make Alexandra feel better by telling her that she can play with Leanne's baby in a few months, which is better than having her own as she still gets her time with you and Daddy by herself. Anyway, good luck sweetie, and you know where I am if you need me  

Claire - Oh-oh, tantrum time?!   Hope she's settled down a little. You'll probably find it's all to do with school and a bit of apprehension, she'll calm down again in a week or two. She probably wouldn't be any different if you had another one at the moment, as she'd be annoyed that the little one got to stay home with you all day!! I learned long ago that you can never win as a mother!! Hope life gets back to normal soon. 

Nights are finally over, and I picked my mother up from the airport last night. Phil made me promise I wouldn't "spill the beans" until after the scan, but it's going to be hard!!

The carpet fitter is coming to do the stair carpet today, which will be nice, so better go and get organised before school.

Take care everyone!

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Thank you for all your support.

You know how life never just throws one thing at you, but tests your emotions instead? Thats me at the moment. Two of my neighbours died last night in a road traffic accident. 

I have spent the day in utter shock. I still cant believe it. Im thinking so much about their family at this dreadful time.

Trish- hope you are keeping well.

I really feel that I have been neglecting you all. Im really sorry...........

On a happier note, I took Alexandra round to see Chloe tonight and she was much better.

Take care

Love

Jeanettexxxx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone,
Just a short one today, i was megga depressed last nite as pete came home with a letter saying the nursery were increasing their fees by £100 in Jan   However, i am a great beliver in things happen for a reason and i was ringing round a few places today (she has got 12 more months till school) and i found a preschool that is only £6 per day   been and had a look and it seems really nice, sending hubby tomorrow for a second opinion as i dont want to base my decision purely on the £275 saving i would be making!! it was a really huge room with loads of toys, they did topics like nursery just not as much writing which is not necessarily a bad thing.
Anyway gotta go she has just drawn all over her face, think the I want attention phase is starting as i am on pc and her dad is putting some lining paper up in the hall.

Love to all
Claire


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## Trishs1970

Hi all,

Claire - I thought Leah had just started school, sorry! Bit of good news about the daycare place though ^thumbsup^ It sounds really nice. I have a registered childminder, but have a new one starting next week as my previous one has given up after 2and a half years   I'm just hoping he settles okay.

Jeanette - What can I say? I can't believe what a bad time you're having at the moment  But as they say, the only way is up now, so hopefully you'll have some good news to celebrate soon.  Glad to hear Alexandra has settled down a little.

Well, I'm struggling to believe I'm really pregnant, despite numerous tests! It's even harder because Phil and I can't even have our own little excited chats, as my mum is here and it would give the game away   Roll on the 23rd, when we can have our scan and let everyone know  

Well, I'm off to pay mother some attention! Take care, and catch you all soon.

Trish xx


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## clairea

Hi Everyone,
Got a bit longer to 'chat' tonite, my parents have just gone home after a roast dinner, thought i would treat them as usually they cook for us and Pete is slobbed in front of some gladiator programme on tv, so pc is all mine!!

Jeannette - I am so sorry to hear your news about your neighbours it must have been a great shock after everything else you have been through in the last couple of weeks, big  coming your way

Trish, I wish she had started school this year, i have another 12months of paying!! However my dh has been to look round today and liked it just as much as me, so i have filled the forms in and need to go and see when we can get her in as we have to give the present nursery 2 months notice and i am not sure if the preschool has any places till Jan anyway... I used to have her at a childminders but had quite a few problems with her not being able to have Leah at short notice and being let down.. then the last one i interviewed wanted me to not only pay for someone to cover her hols but to pay her holiday pay to  so i then put her into nursery and never really looked back.
It seems like we are both looking forward to the 23rd but for different reasons thats when i fly out   ready to go now...

Well gonna go and make conversation with dh as the gladiator prog has finished.

Love & best wishes to all
Claire


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## Trishs1970

Hi all,

Jeanette - How's it going honey? Hope you're feeling a little better and things are improving for you 

Claire - You'll be as bad as me, wishing the time away till the 23rd!! We've had some bad scan news on the 1st trimester board today, so those of us who are still waiting are getting really worried. I'm just praying everything will be okay. Your hols will do you the world of good, so enjoy every minute. I don't want you to feel even slightly guilty that we're all slogging away at the grindstone while you're gone!! 

Dee - How are things with you?

Well, as I said, I've spent the day in panic mode, due to 2 of the girls on the other board having bad news at their scans. Trying to get back my PMA, but struggling a little at the moment   Got my mum here for another day and a half, then she flies back Saturday, so Phil and I will have one night on our own before he starts nights on Monday   I'm back at work Tuesday, so at least I'll have something to keep my mind occupied till we go to the clinic   Still not sure what to do about work, as I should really ask to be moved out of prisoner contact, but don't know whether to wait until the scan, what do you think? This whole thing is such a worry! 

Anyway, speak again soon.

Trish xx


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## jeanette

Hi everyone

Thank you for your support. I am feeling better, although I get a little wobbly at times.

Trish- hope you are ok. Sorry to hear whats been happening on the ist trimester board. Think positive...We will all be doing the same for you as well.
If you are going to be potentially put in any situation that places you at risk I would ask to be moved (but thats me). Do work know? Cause if they do they have a responsibility to make sure you are not placed at any risk. Trish Im so pleased for you and your family. Your news gives the rest of us hope and positive vibes!!!!!

Claire- where are you off to. Im sure you have already said but my mind has been a bit like 'fog' recently. Have a fab time.

Im off to Ireland on 25th October Hooray!!!!! Then I come back and go into hospital on the 6th of November for knee surgery ( 

Hope everyone else is well

Love

Jeanettexxxxx


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## *Kim*

This thread is getting a bit long so have started a new home for you. Good luck. Here is the link

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/*********/index.php?board=44;action=display;threadid=4161;start=0#lastPost


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