# clueless



## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

Hi,

would be grateful for help, please. - I just wanted to say hi and meet some people, but I don't know which thread to join (dim, I know! ) I'm a newbie on the site (nooooooo). Wasn't sure whether to join the LGBT TTC thread, or just say hi and hope someone replies 

DW and me are on our 2ww. But not long to go - OTD Monday 3 Nov. Would be so good to meet other gay couples (not least because DW's family keeps asking her how *I * am. Their hearts are in the right place, but they've got some way to go...)

Me 41 (OMG, how did that happen? ), DW 30 

Thanks for reading


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## WildLife (Jan 2, 2006)

Hi CB

Welcome.  I am in several threads, this, the LWC one and the over 40s so just chat away.  I think everyone on here repeats themselves at least once and everyone else knows why.

Don't be hard on the family, they're just asking how you are because they want to ask 'Are there any good/bad signs'.  I doubt they feel they can ask outright questions like 'Is she bleeding?'  I am sure men get the same.

I am sure they understand that emotionally you both have some weight on you.  I know of families who just ignore the whole thing so at least they're asking eh?

Anyway, there are lots of lovely women on here and no doubt many in London so hgang around and they'll probably pass by sooner or later.

Good luck with the


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## mintyfaglady (Aug 25, 2007)

Hi Chilli Bug and welcome!

Good luck to you both on this TWW - is this your first try? Are you using a clinic or a known donor or...?

There are lots of great people on this board, with loads of experience, so dive in and join any of the threads.

Take care,
Minty
x


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

hi chilli bug

welcome to FF and the LGB section!

so is it you or your dw who is getting pregnant?  sorry it didnt seem clear to me from your post.  im probs being dense!  

i post here and i post on the cycle buddies threads for the aug/sept TXers and we are still posting even tho we have finished treatmetnt.  

sorry the dw's parents arent being the best!  it sometimes takes a while for people to be comfortable with how to use the right language.  it took my dp's mum about 20 years to use the word lesbian!  now she is totally cool and her and gaby's dad is too, and they are both v excited about being grandparents again!

ooh good luck with the count down to otd!!  let us know how you get on.  is this your first cycle?

loads of luck aimeex


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## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

Wow! I got replies! Thanks guys!  And thanks for thread suggestions.

Wrin - it was so generous of you to reply to me. I saw your bfn news. Huuuge  It's so hard. Hang in there, hun.

Yeah, what I said about DW's family did look a bit harsh. We *are* glad that they care. It's just hard sometimes when they behave as if it's only happening to me, not to us. But you're right - they do care, and that's great.

Minty - thanks for the good luck wishes. It's our first try with IVF, but we've had (unsuccessful) IUI before. We're at a clinic, using an unknown donor. At first, we both had big issues with using an unknown donor, but in the end it was the only realistic option - and we can see the advantages of it, too. (Could do without workmates joking about the donor being a particular colleague, though!! )

Aimee - thanx for the warm welcome. And it's not you being dim - you're dead right it wasn't clear from my post. I'm going first (coz of my age), then much younger (and much more glamorous) DW is going next. Greedy of us, we know, but.....

Good to know the progress Gaby's parents made. And huuge  to you and Gaby on your bfp!

Thank you all, and really looking forward to talking with you all again soon . We're really nervous - testing tomorrow. We were going to go for a healthy, romantic stroll on the beach. But it's freezing! So we've just stocked up on sweets  and DVDs and we're going to hit the couch for a snuggly film fest.

Ruth x


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

sending loads and loads of         for tomoroow Chili Bug  ... really hope you get your first bfp.

so first you then dp for pregnancy.  sounds like a great plan.  

hope you had a lovely walk on the beach.  where do you live?  we have a beach by our house too.  and i love the winter beach walks.


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Good luck tomorrow Ruth


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## lucky2010 (Jan 10, 2006)

good luck for tomorrow and welcome x x


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## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

Thank you everybody! It's sooo lovely to have your messages. 

Well..... at 4.23 this morning, DW and me got a     We are in a spin! We feel so lucky. After 8 unsuccessful IUIs, we got a bfp with our first IVF. Thank you thank you thank you to everyone for your welcomes and support. 

Lots of   and     to everyone
Ruth x


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## WildLife (Jan 2, 2006)

Many many congrats. xx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Many many congrats Ruth


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Many congratulations on your  wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy
L x


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## mintyfaglady (Aug 25, 2007)

Congratualations Chilli Bug and Partner!! Great news! 
Stick around and hop on over to the pregnancy thread and the general chitchat.


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

[fly]congratulations Ruth ... so pleased!![/fly]


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## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

Thank you Wrin, LadyLottie, JJ1, Minty, & Aimee for the lovely congrats!     

Sorry for delay - had a bit of a stressful time, with what turned out to be gastroenteritis last week and a scare this morning over what looked like 'herald bleed'   Been checked out by clinic this morning and all seems fine  

Catch up with you lovely ladies on other threads, no doubt
Ruth x


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

oooh so sorry about your gastroentiritis ... horrid.  what is herald bleed?  glad all ok now though.

ax


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## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

Thanks, Aimee  

Um, well, um 'herald bleed' is the delicate euphemism for what I call 'The Sludge' that I get just before AF! So was really scary this morning. But the clinic was great - said I could come straight down, and they gave me a scan. They're happy, so I feel soooo much better. Only trouble is, I just can't settle to do any work today - which is pretty much how it's been for about the past 3 weeks!

How's things with you, hun?
Ruth x


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

oooh herald bleed i like it!!  i call that spotting!!    i get it too before my period.  and i had it about day 20 post IUI but i knew that it was normal so i wasnt to worried about it at the time.  although i did check with my friend who has had three bambinos and so she reassured me. what could they see in the scan at that point?  when you get to your scan in november 24th how preg will you be?  that im sure will reassure you.

god i have been very on and off with work since finding out .... especially in the beggining.  was just too emotional and distracted.

feeling a bit tired today and wondering if im fighting off a mild bug cos have diaroea (sp?) sorry if tmi... and just feel a bit ropey.

i might go home early today.


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## Chilli Bug (Oct 30, 2008)

sounds like you should go home early, hun, tuck yourself up on the couch, and drink plenty of water. Am sure there'll be something on telly that will make you feel better... Lol I can't spell runny poo either!  

They couldn't see much on the scan today, as I'm only 5 wks 1 day. But they spotted what they think is a sac. Also, my ovaries are enlarged (don't I know it!), which they said was normal. I was a bit taken aback, though, because they seemed to spot 2 fibroids. I only found out on a scan before ec that I had a fibroid, now it seems I've got 2   Still, they really did seem happy with everything, so that's great. They've offered another scan next week, which I've taken them up on. I'll be 7 wks pg on 24 Nov scan   

Hope you're feeling better soon, Aimee  . Thanks for the reassurance on the herald/sludge/spotting  
Ruth x


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## leoaimee (Jun 3, 2008)

thats great they are giving you so many scans!  hope it calms your nerves.  its so hard when you ttc for so long isnt it?  

just managed to get myself a lift for the part of the way home i walk so thats made me feel better.  one more hour to go!


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Herald Bleed


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