# Board newbie- do we stick with IVF? (3yrs TTC, 1MC, 1FT/BFN, 2FET/BFN)



## Jess_CW (Oct 7, 2017)

Hello,  I'm new to the board but want to connect with those going through similarly rough times. I'm feeling like most of my friends get pregnant as easy as they sneeze, so it's rough at the moment!

Hubby and I have been TTC for 3 years. I'm 32, and he's 33. We got pregnant naturally once but that ended in a MC 2 years ago. Since then we've qualified for IVF with the NHS. Our first 3 transfers (1 fresh 2 frozen) were all BFN. Not even a squinter. We have 2 more blastocysts left, we'll probably transfer both next time.  Our clinic doesn't offer pgs testing so don't know if they're any good. After that we have 1 more cycle, as long as I keep the weight down.

We're really struggling to decide if we should keep going with IVF for the next cycle or accept that nothing is implanting and move to surrogacy. We're in the lucky position that the cost of surrogacy likely won't be an issue. But are we giving up too soon?? Just feeling so helpless and hopeless after the last BFN, don't want to keep chugging away at IVF for the sake of it if it isn't going to work. I know we still have time on our sides, for the moment, but I'm just so desperate for our child 🙁


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Welcome to FF  

I'm sorry to read of your loss and your unsuccessful cycles, IVF is mentally and physically gruelling and going through cycles with no hint of a BFP is soul destroying  

Have your clinic made any changes to your medication or suggested anything else at the reviews of your negative cycles? Have the suggested immune testing or an endometrial scratch?  Only you can decide if you want to continue with IVF as its you that has to go through it but personally I'd want to know I'd exhausted every possibility before moving on to something else. Particularly so as your treatment is being NHS funded.

Have a good look around the site, there's lots of useful information in the different areas, you might find the negative and in between cycles area helpful right now. There are lists of questions to ask at reviews and other things to consider before embarking on future treatment.

Good luck

Dory
Xx


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## Rio2016 (Aug 24, 2016)

Sending love Jess.

It's so tough isn't it. I'm on round 4 at the moment and thinking ahead to next steps.

I too just  want to have a baby now too. The longing and waiting is so tough.

Could you start the surrogacy process alongside you trying? If money not an issue? Is that allowed? I know Caprice (the model) had success at the same time as her surrogate, but not sure if that's something you can do in the UK xx


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## Franny80 (Apr 10, 2016)

Hi Jess,

I had one fresh and two frozen goes at IVF and none of them worked. I was also worried about my egg quality or concerned there was another problem - like immunes etc. Speaking to one specialist, he advised that I was stimmed too fast and then triggered too early, so even though we got three blasts, none of them worked. After sorting out some tubal issues I have managed pregnancy naturally twice since (once was a miscarriage), so I agree with him that it wasn't an egg quality issue, but a stimming issue. It does really effect things. 

NICE guidelines advise it takes three goes at IVF - and that's fresh rounds, not frozen. So maybe you could give own egg ivf another chance? you should definitely speak to your clinic and see why they feel you weren't successful, and maybe visit some other clinics too and see what they suggest as your own clinic may not be as forthright about what they feel they could have done better. You can get hold of your notes from your clinic - they are really useful to take with you when you see other clinics for advise. 

I know it's really frustrating and so emotionally draining, but you still have so many options open to you so please don't lose heart

Xx


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