# Home schooling?? Ideas &/ or experience??



## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

Hi All! OK, so a bit of back-ground: OH & I have been approved and are currently looking at a sibling group where the eldest is due to start school in September. We have been told if everything goes well, and it is still early days (no official link but their SW is coming to visit in a couple of weeks   ), October /November for matching & intros is reasonable timing. Now this means that LO will not only have to start school in September but then move 100s of miles (from the north to south coast) and start another new school where not only will she stand out as she has a strong regional accent but also we won't have time to really bond and work on attachment issues. Oh, and our local school is so over-subscribed their waiting list is 83 children long, so we'd have to drive through traffic for 25-30 mins to do school run to a school that is awful! Their background also suggests they'd really benefit from therapeutic parenting. So, naturally, I'm half blind with reading everything from the massive Theraplay book to building the bonds of attachments etc. and I've kind of come to the (possibly premature) conclusion that she may be best to stay home and 'home school' until a) she is settled and wanting to go to school b) a place opens at our lovely local school. But it seems so radical! I was an English (as a foriegn language) teacher for years, am now an Early Years Professional, so I feel capable, and my SW looooves the idea, but, and this is my actual question (!!!) has anyone on here done this- kept LO out of school until ready? How did it work? Does anyone know of any adopters who've done this and are loving it or regretting it? Any ideas really, I just want to be a well prepped as possible when we meet their SW! Thank you for reading!


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## KJB1978 (Nov 23, 2010)

Hi Autumn Jade 

Ive no experience of home schooling but would love to do it - you certainly sound perfect for it!

Regarding the schools - I was under the impression that the child when placed with you until the legal paperwork goes through will still be classed as "In Care" so the school you choose has to make a place for them even if they are full to capacity in the same way they would if a child with a statement of education wanted to.  That is what happens in our county and we have friends that are looking into the same thing.  May have got the wrong end of the stick as havent been through it myself but might be worth a call to the school/LA?


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

simply YES do it!! I'm pm ing you immediately!!kj x


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## skyblu (Sep 9, 2010)

Hi Autumn Jade,

I have no experience in this Field at all,but as KJB1978 has said if the child is under the care system then your local school will have to find a place for her. If she is not five yet, from what happens in my LA they don't have to start primary school until they are five so that might be an idea, but from what you have said in your post you sound that you are more than capable of schooling her your self.
Good luck
Skyblu.xxx


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## wynnster (Jun 6, 2003)

I was just going to post to say I know just the person you need to speak to    But she's on it already


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## someday (Sep 11, 2008)

I think you should do it. Home schooling is something I have always wanted to do. Sadly I lack the confidence in my ability to do it. I think it's a great thing to do though xxxx


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## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

I all, thank you for your replies  

KJB & Skyblu- yes, thank you! I did know that before, but there's so much swirling round in my thoughts right now I had *completely* forgotten! Thanks! I called the LA on Thursday and didn't even think to mention that but I'll check it out Monday- I want to have all my facts ready when I meet our SW on Thursday! They (LA) were actually really supportive of going HS (prob due to the lack of school places!) and suggested I go on the waiting list & HS until a place comes up. However (!) the more I read about HS, the more I'd love to do it, at least until LO is developmentally & attachment wise ready for it.

Someday- if you want to do it, you can! You don't need to have been a teacher or anything- I'm reading so much about it right now (I have perhaps been a tad excessive   !!) but all the support & ideas are really accessible. XXXXX. If you do think more about it let me know and we can share ideas x x 

Wynnster- thank you, but yes, have had fantastic msg through!

Keemjay- am starting my pm to you now, big big thanks x x


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## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

Opps! typo! I meant 'Hi All', not 'I all'!


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

Hiya autumn,
I think it's a fab idea. I run a nurture class in my school for children who havent had the early experiences or attachments they need. As you all ready know the issues these poor kiddies face are huge - difficulty making, developing and keeping friends, concentrating and generally developing the general skills that are needed to succeed in our restricted educational system, the list just goes on. From my limited experience ( i am totally obsessed with early brain development, the impact of neglect/ trauma/ abuse and how both effect education - sad I know   )  i believe passionately that if children aren't happy, if they don't have the secure attachments etc then everything else, and I mean everything else goes out the window.  Can't wait to see what you decide to do


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## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

Hiya Flash, thank you for your reply- it's great to have input from a Nurture Room Teacher as we haven't been officially linked to these LOs yet and as HS is still so marginal I don't want them to think we're extremists and chose another couple! It's an excellent point that even if a child attends school, the school may be having to fill in the nurturing gaps before they can settle well enough in class to be able to absorb & learn- so why not do that at home??! I'm totally with you on the early brain development too, it's fascinating to me that simple things like eye contact, cuddles and mirroring noises & expressions to even the youngest of babies affects how their brain grows physically! It's like light to a plant, amazing. I will keep you posted


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

I would LOVE to HS ours, when we find them.  But sadly I'm the main wage earner, so if I stayed home, we couldn't live.   

I think it's great you're looking into this, and best of luck!  I'm sure you'll be great!  My good friend (and adoption referee) has home schooled her daughter (who is also our friend!) and she's the most skilled, intelligent, confident and well socialised girl of her age I've ever met.  

I guess you've found the Education Otherwise site?


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## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

Hi AoC 

Thanks for your post- it's great to hear about the times when things work out! Having said that, I've been researching this for over a week now on a bunch of different sites & contacts and have yet to have anyone say HSing didn't work after trying it- interesting huh? At the same time, although my SW is supportive, she has said that the common belief for adoptees is that they particularly benefit from the structure & routine at school. I'd still like to see some proper research into adoptees & HSing to see if it supports the 'common belief' or the HS theory. It's a fascinating subject I think and much under-researched- I can't even find anything to say if adoptees tend to thrive in a particular kind of school- mainstream, Steiner, Montessori etc. Someone really should put some £ into studying that!

Hope you're enjoying the (sporadic!) sunshine!


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## Autumn Jade (Aug 29, 2010)

OOh, my coffee has just kicked in and I've realised that you're in the same boat as me- approved & waiting for a match! How's your search going? Are you LA or VA?


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## thespouses (Jan 5, 2006)

Someone asked me to look into this through my professional database and I couldn't come up with any research! I don't think there has been any.

But someone (maybe you?) was asking on the Adoption UK board and they said that while a child is still a LAC they more or less have to go to school, as the LA will ring up to check all the LAC in their care are actually in school. Sorry if that's not helpful!


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

thats not actually true..if the sw's are all in agreement its in the childs best interests then its perfectly fine..


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