# Feeling so low



## Jingy31 (Jun 21, 2011)

My husband had a vasectomy in June 2006 when our 3rd child was 9 months old. I had changed my mind but he went ahead and had the operation without my consent. It caused a huge rift between us and in 2009 we separated for 8 weeks. We had time apart, he realised at long last what he had done and we decided to work on our relationship. He offered to have a reversal, and in October 2010 he had one done privately. Unfortunately the results were not as we hoped. The operation was a success but his sperm analysis in September last year showed these results...... 

PH 8.5
Round Cells 0
Volume 3.6ml
Concentration 52  x 10 (small 6 above)/ml
Morphology 7...x10 (same as above)/ml

Antisperm Antibodies
1gG 100% binding
IgA 95% binding

Motility at 37 degrees C

Grade A 10%  (excellent progression)
Grade B 11%  (Sluggish progression)
Grade C 14%  (non progressive)
Grade D 65%  (Non motile)

I am still devastated. I have given up so much that we have rarely had sex as I feel quite low about it all. We are very happy together, and have 3 wonderful children together but I still crave that 4th child. I am 33 this year, he is 35. I am finding things so difficult at the moment as my sister in law is due in October and has just had her 20 week scan. I had a scan on Monday to just investigate heavy periods. Lying there seeing nothing on the screen made me feel devastated.

I don't know if there is a small chance or not. We aren';t going through fertility treatment as we said we wouldn't go down that route, it would prove too costly for us, and we have paid out alot for the reversal and tests.

Has anyone been in this situation, and if so what have you done?


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## shanaaya (Jun 8, 2012)

Hi,

I cant say I have been through something like this but can echo your feelings. I hope and pray for your & your husbands good health and your wish come true soon. At the same time, I would say, you are blessed with three lovely children ... be happy with them and dont let fourth child's wish interfere between you & your husbands relationship. You guys need to be together for other three lovely children too.

I thought of replying because of your subject line... I feel the same. Want to share my things with someone but cant express...
You have three and struggling for the fourth one .. and here I am, after one lovely daughter, cant have another one. We tried for almost a year, then finally when home Pregnancy test came positive, went for a scan ... just to identify that it was ectopic. Since then my wife's moral is down. Whatever small savings we had, was invested in IVF and now cant even afford any new treatment. 

We have been trying since then but no luck. 
Anyways...hope I have not said anything wrong...just felt like expressing myself. I am looking for any straight surrogate who is willing to help purely on moral grounds. Hope we find one ...


Regards,


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