# Re Anyone with similar experience?



## Cleo02 (Mar 21, 2007)

Hi Everyone,

Will try not to ramble but having a teary day which might mke me go off on tangents, if you have the time,please bear with me as it will include a couple of questions!!!!
Just had BFN from my 4th IVF cycle.Had changed to ARGC in July and have been monitored ever since as I battled to get my FSH down.Finally got it to 9.2,hurrah,celebrations and the green light!!!!!
My cycle proceeded ok,I was on 600 of Merional all the way through and had 11 follicles.This was about the same response as I have had on my previous 3 cycles give or take a couple and I have never had less than 9 eggs(Bearing in mind my FSH was fluctuatiing between 12-14.7)This being the case we were more than a little unnerved to be told on EC day that I had only produced 4 eggs.
At that point, the 'Positivity Fairy' had too much of a grip of me and I banned DH from asking any questions about this as I was determined to focus on what we *did * have,rather than what we *didn't*(quietly terrified of course in case none of them made it!!!)Thankfully and gratefully 2 of them did.I got called in for a Day 3 transfer which again I didn't question as I didn't want anything but positive vibes around me(I think this might have been another sign that things weren't great as I think ARGC like to get you to Blast?)I had a 5 cell and a 5/6 cell,no mention of grading were made and again I didn't ask(didn't want to be told that they were anything less than perfect,hey I'm good at this denial/positive thinking when I manage to get in 'the zone'!!!!)
I was put on Gestone IM and Clexane and had probably the easiest of my 2WW's(not that it was easy,but I managed to make it to test day with a reasonable hope of a BFP helped along by my body cruelly making me feel exactly as I did when I got preg naturally!!!)
So here I am now,back to booing and trawling through all your posts in the search of a bit of hope and comfort and to ask advice on the following:
I feel all the signs are there that things have taken a real nose-dive for me,is there anyone out there that has had the same kind of response and gone on to try again?
If I could do another cycle am I being realistic in fearing that I could go through all the stimms and not have anything for EC?(question for the doc I know,but you all have a wealth of knowledge and experience)
Do you keep going until you really don't have anything left to be able to live with yourself in the future that you tried until it was absolutely the end?
Does my EC result show that I am running out of eggs?(I have done everything I can possibly do to boost them,Accupuncture,organic diet,no caffeine,no booze,yoga,given up work,The Foresight supplement program-DH involved in most of that too-inc no booze,he has been a star)
I don't live in the UK and I really regret now not asking more questions-as I feel trapped between accepting that this avenue is all over for me and getting a grip of myself and moving forward.It will be Christmas before I am back and have a chance to follow up the cycle and I don't want to be in limbo until then.
Does anyone ever accept it's all over?Won't you always hope for that miracle to happen? 
I am sorry this has no structure,all over the place bit like me today.Going to leave this with you and go and enjoy a nice cup of PG tips,builders strength,caffeine enriched tea!!!!!
Thankyou for listening,I don't post much but you will never know how many times so many of you have helped me(then again,you probably do as everyone sadly has been there!)
x


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## Zulu (Apr 25, 2007)

Hi there Cleo,

Sorry I cant help with your questions but I think you needed a        .

Take care
Bev


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## Happy Mummy (Sep 22, 2006)

Hi Cleo,
I am so sorry sweetie  , but of course you can try again if you feel like it.
You are only 37, and FSH fluctuate, sometimes a low FSH does not necessarily mean all is well as oestrogen can be high, and vice versa, so at my clinic they have not tested me for FSH except the first time ( I am on my 3rd one at the moment).
First short prot I had 8 eggs out of 8 follies and good grade embies , so have a frozen account   but BFN and lots of side effects. 4 months later, had a chemical pregnancy ( they thought it was ectopic to start with) but I had only 4 follies and one could not be reached as right ovary was not in a good place and had only one follie inside ( although a very juicy one  ). 3 out of 3 fertilized and were put back in ( I am 41 now).
This time I did long protocole, and on day 5, I have 10 follies!!!! , 5 very small and 5 not small, but docs think most of them should be good at EC.
EC probably early next week.
So from one IVF to the next, the number of eggs vary and docs will say that they don't know why. 
Remember cleo that it only takes one egg!!

Between IVF 2 and  IVF 3, I  let 6 months go by so that I was rested and in a good shape. 
Also I had accupuncture which has helped my body get a better hormonal balance and more strenght and helped me also with all my emotions regarding past IVFs.I also got some herbs from him and they helped regulate my cycle. I also decided to have osteopathy ( very gentle cranial and general , no cracking and I believe she has helped with the adenomyosis!)
I was told I had 2-3% chance of getting pregnant with IVF because I have adenomyosis ( like endo but inside womb muscle so can't be treated and I have a lot of it). This time at scan , I am told by this doc that my adenomyosis is now moderate and they don't think the buserelin could have made a difference like that in 2 weeks.So it might be the osteo and the herbs.
I may notget pregnant this time again, but I feel healthier and in a better shape in terms of hormones and womb lining. 

You can PM me if you wish to get more info about my accupuncturist or my osteopath.

It is important you have a review with your doc though, just after christmas,  when you have been able to rest a bit and make sure you ask him all these questions and many more! maybe make a list ( I do, as I am French and English is not my first language it certainly helps, but even otherwise , I believe I am more relax at the review if I have written everything down ). 

It will help you, getting answers and if you decide to change clinics it will help the new doc too.

If you decide this is your last treatment , there are threads here on adopting.

You are still very young in terms of IVF age. I have heard of quite a few women who had more than 4 IVF and also had fet, or natural IVF and then it happened. 
I am sending you lots of    
Future Mummy


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## Cleo02 (Mar 21, 2007)

Thankyou Bev and Future Mummy for taking the time to reply and for making me feel a bit better!I think I just need to cool my boots a bit and have a breather,more than anything I just feel plain old worn out at the moment!!!!I wish you the very best of luck with your treatments.I will drop you a PM about your osteopath and your thoughts on it Future Mummy,if I have another go,it's something that I haven't looked into.I have always been a bit scared of chinese herbs to be honest when my accupuncturist has tried to prescribe them,just in case they mess with the IVF dugs,but you sound like you have really benefiited from them.Here's to forthcoming success to us all,kind and best regards 
Cleo x


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