# 11 years ago I started this journey, and STILL so envious of pregnant women!



## Dolphins (Sep 29, 2011)

Hi,

I started my fertility journey about 11 years ago now, and in all of that time, I have tried naturally to no avail, but have had one child with a successful IVF/ICSI cycle, and I have also suffered a very early miscarriage, via a IVF/ICSI cycle.

Therefore, my next port of call will be to use DE (Donor Eggs), for a much wanted sibling for my child.  However after all of this time, I 'still' feel really envious of pregnant women, esp. when they seem to have their baby/ies easily, and it is painful for me to 'see' pregnant women and to hear other people's happy news, as I think at the time "why can't this be me?"

Is it natural (excuse the pun!) to still feel like this, after all of this time. 

I would 'very much' appreciate your comments.

xx


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## bobo66 (May 1, 2012)

Hello Dolphins!

Firstly, I'm sorry you have such pain to deal with. Hugs!

These are very powerful feelings and I think time on this infertility journey is often really tough. I don't know, but I wonder whether being on the journey and continuing to have treatment, while it still gives us hope, also means it's a very raw kind of pain which can be difficult to process to a point of being less acutely painful. I've been on this journey for 7 years and haven't been pregnant and haven't either had a miscarriage or a baby so I can't identify totally with what you're feeling, but I have had the privilege to meet many women who have fought so hard to have children through fertility treatment, and I know from them that the feelings about people getting pregnant easily can be very powerful, especially as their continuing infertility can become 'hidden' by their having living children.

Xx


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## Efi78 (Jun 26, 2017)

Dolphins
You feeling are completely normal. However they are not helpful for you. People around us will always fall pregnant and if we fall into this trap of jealousy then we are going to go mad. Try to concentrate on yourself and the positive aspects of your life. You already have one child. I wish I were in your place. Focus on him
/her and on other things that make you happy and let other people focus on theirs. You never know what they have been through in their lives


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## mierran (Apr 24, 2009)

Hi,
I have 3 and I still find it difficult when someone gets pregnant. It doesn't stop me.being happy for them and besotted with my wonderful children but I still grieve the things I will never experience - the pos hpt after a late af , the seeing my own features in my kids ( they are all DE), being able to TTC without having to take time of work and it being public knowledge that I am trying.. I wouldn't change anything but it still makes me sad sometimes.
So don't worry- you aren't alone. It's just a scar from the journey you have been on. 
Big hugs. X x


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