# When did you tell work?



## Princess Monica (May 26, 2006)

Hi all,

Just a quick question but when did you all tell your employer you were applying to adopt?  We are with a VA and due to start the prep course and home study at the end of April.  Is it too soon?  I want to do right by them but then I know there is still a looooooooooooooooong way to go yet so don't want to tell them too soon and then be asked every few weeks whats happening!!

I think my boss probably has an idea as when I was off sick a few weeks ago someone opened my post and it was books about adoption, she didn't question me directly just said sorry someone opened your post so I've kept it im my tray for you!  I didn't comment either!

Thanks 

Princess Monica x


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## Tarango (Nov 3, 2006)

Hi, 

For us, my boss knew we were planning to adopt before we applied to start. But then I changed jobs and my new boss was only told when they had to do a reference for me - so I'd say about half way through HS. 
I told the rest of the team once we had been approved  

I know what you mean about doing the right thing by them but you don't have to say anyting to them at the moment unless you want to - a word of warning though you will be asked many, many times 'any news yet' so that may be a deciding factor!!   

Good luck with your journey
love
T
xxx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

My friend works for the NHS and she told her boss that she was planning to adopt and they gave her the time off for the home study and SW meetings as if she were pregnant she would have had a right to antenatal appts off in work time.
Good luck


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## wynnster (Jun 6, 2003)

Hi

Oh dear to your post being opened   nothing like a bit of privacy. 

I think I told my work when we started home study as we had a rough idea when panel would be.  I then reminded them again once we were approved that we could be matched at any point.

Best of luck x


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## Old Timer (Jan 23, 2005)

I told my line manager when HS started as I wanted to be able to leave early for visits and make the hours up on other days rather than take holiday and as we were meeting every week it was too often to pretend I was going to the dentist or whatever.  At that point I explained that we had a long way to go just to get to panel let alone anything else.

When we were approved I spoke to them again and said that as soon as we had a link I would tell them and give themas much notice as I could.  I gave them about 8 weeks notice in the end.

This time round I've been less open with where we are at, they don't know we go to panel next month but they do know we are going through the process again.

OT x


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

This is a question i am stuck on too! All the girls know but i am thinking of talking to the 2 boss's on their own one evening over a drink, or 3  , as i feel out of respect i should tell them rather than them hearing it from someone or by seeing it in a search engine! I am on here or the auk site every day without fail and have to keep rmembering to wipe it off the pc so i will be glad when everyone knows  
I nearly had the same thing happen when i had 3 books delivered from amazon and my name wasn't on it, but luckily my friend who i nurse with got there first  

xxx


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## curvycat (Apr 8, 2008)

I told work straight aways as I looked at our adoption policy and saw in needed changing

I think it really depends on ur relationship at work although I would suggest to all newbies to check your adoption policy as it will probably vary to the maternity policy! 

I however was successful in changing our policy and I work for a multi national blue chip pharmaceutical company so it can be done!!


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## kirmut (Jan 15, 2006)

I told my boss only when it came to needing the reference. She was great about it. I did contact HR to make some further enquiries about time off after reading the adoption policy. No time off during HS but during matching it will be the same as antenatal visits, time off when needed.

Cuvycat, I work for a multi-national pharma company too!


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## Princess Monica (May 26, 2006)

Thanks for all your replies.  I think I will tell my boss over the next few weeks.  I don't have any problems with the policy because I work in HR, coincidentally for a large pharma company!!

Love Princee Monica x


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## curvycat (Apr 8, 2008)

maybe we should start our own thread!!  

I am a medical rep so out on the field seeing consultants ext for my sins how about u 2?


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## ❣Audrey (Aug 22, 2008)

I told my boss straight away.  But then I work with another FF lady and our work are very supportive of TX etc so it was only natural to tell them which way my journey was heading! They are all so supportive and excited.  It's a really lovely environment xxx


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## Princess Monica (May 26, 2006)

Helllllllllloooooooo again.

Well I told my boss this week and she was really supportive and said she was really excited for me, I said I had booked all the prepare to adopt courses out of my holiday entitlement but would need to leave for the home visits about half past 3 which she said was no problem!

But then the day after I got told that due to "work priorites" I wasn't going to be moving to a new position I had just got on another team for many months if at all.  To be fair I am already being paid for this promotion but do feel a bit miffed that suddenly I can't actually move teams and do the job!

Just found out our first home study visit is when a colleague is on holiday so I wouldn't normally be allowed time off when she is not there.  Going to discuss it next week with me manager but what do i do if she suddently decides I can't go?

Love Princess Monica x


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## curvycat (Apr 8, 2008)

I would put the pressure on as if this was a prenantal visit she wouldnt stop you and why should you be treated any differently?

I have played the you need to give me the same rights as someone who could have children as otherwise I am being discriminated against! 

I have had to use holiday for meetings but they have never refused me

Good luck


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