# Sticky  LGBT Newbies Welcome Thread - post here to get started!



## Damelottie

I hope this is useful for any new people to the thread


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## jo36

Excellent idea Ladylottie  

Thanks


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## lesbo_mum

Newbie thread good thinking Ladylottie!!


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## BaT

I suppose I should post here!!!

I don't really feel like a newbie as I have been lurking for a number of months but have only just decided to start posting.

My wife and I (well I am) are currently having treatment through LWC (stimulated IUI with Anon donor).  Due to the problems earlier in the month I didn't think that we would be able to start treatment this month but they opened the sperm bank up just in time for me to have my 2-3 day scan a little late at day 5 (but don't think this has caused a prob).  I have just got back from LWC today and we are set for IUI at 3pm tomorrow!!! I am starting to get excited especially as the sperm bank phoned me on the way home with the characteristics of the sperm.  

Hi to you all,

B x


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## lesbo_mum

Hi BaT

Welcome to FF!!

Goodluck with this cycle!

Em x


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## MandMtb

Hi BaT, welcome to FF, and good luck for your IUI tomorrow!

There are a few of us on the 2ww, so you will be in good company.

S x


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## BaT

Thanks for the welcomes.


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## jo36

Hi BaT, 

Welcome to FF, you've def joined the best forum! There's a great bunch of gals on here!

All the best with your IUI tomorrow, exciting times ahead for you and DW.

I had my first IUI yesterday, well not first, just the first since the birth of DD in 2004. So a long time has lapsed since my last tx! Have had AF pains all day but I remember this being normal from last time, so please don't panic if this is one of your very early symptoms. All normal!

 for you and DW.

Jo x


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## leoaimee

welcome B xxxx good luck tomorrow!   

jo   for you too!


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## Steph29

Hi Bat,

Welcome to ff.

Good luck with your iui tommarrow   

Stephx


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## nismat

Welcome BaT, hope you don't find the 2ww does your head in!


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## BaT

Hi Nismat

I hope so too!!!!  The only thing doing my head in at the mo is not being able to do anything too physical!!! I am a very outdoorsy, physical person who can't sit on my backside for any longer than 10mins so this is very hard for me.  Additionally DW is at work today so I am a little bored at home at the mo.  

B x


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## lmb15

Hi,
We're currently on our first cycle of IVF with anonymous sperm. I'm doing egg share and have been down regulating for 5 weeks so that my recipient can catch up. Not good  
Got a phone call today though to say that i can start stimulating this Thursday with my first scan next monday. Yippee!! So excited it's all getting going.
Good luck to everyone,
Lisa


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## lesbo_mum

HI Lisa

Think i spoke to you on the nuture forum... good luck with this cycle hope you get a BFP.

EM x


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## lmb15

Hi Em,
Yeah, i'm from the Nurture forum! How are you getting on? Decided on your course of action?!
Lisa x


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## lesbo_mum

still undecided at the moment... we have a holiday in September to have first then we will either start with IUI or try DIY with fertility 1st..


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## Maybbaby4

Hi everyone! I'm relatively new to FF and hope it's ok to post my news!
Everything has gone well so far, except for the poor quality of the donor sperm ( a lovely surprise! ) which means we have ended up converting to ICSI.
Currently 3 embies on board from ET on 27/6. I am worrying about everything!
DP and I live in west yorkshire and she has also tried this cycle AI using fresh donor sperm.
Good luck to all!   Xxx


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## ragill

*Hi everyone

i'm a newbie! just started out on fertility friends, and been reading loads of messages, its amazing to hear everyone's stories and know that i'm not the only one going through this whole process (i knew i wasnt, but it felt like it!)

My partner and i have been ttc since may 09 with anon donor (DIY) had a bit of hope for a BFP this month as was 3 days late for af (and its NEVER late), but then i started and was sooooo sad, but gotta think that its early days.....

hope to hear and share stories with u all

Rachel x*


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## lesbo_mum

Hi Rachel

think i've spoken to you on the babycentre!! welcome to FF!

Em x


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## ragill

Hi Em, u certainly have! Hope all is well with u


i saw that u'd recommended this site to someone and thought i'd have a nosey!!!!

R xx


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## lesbo_mum

ha ha yeah i recommend FF to everyone i swear i should be in marketing for this site! How are you finding it on here i love it lol


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## curves angel

Hi everyone. I'm a newbie on FF, hope this is the right place to post. My partner and I are on our first cycle of IUI. We started out a year ago and were told we had to get the patency of my tubes checked, the first investigation showed up inconclusive but after a lap and dye op we were given a clean bill of health   .
So here we are, it's day one after IUI. This is gonna be a long two weeks with lots of   for a BFP!
I've been looking at the message boards and it's great to see all the positive messages of support. It's great to know there's others out there that can understand what you're going through.

Good luck to you all!


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## Misspie

Hi Mabybabby, Rachel & Angel

Welcome to FF, good luck on you journey, and you'll find everyone here so helpful and friendly!

Look forward to eharing more of your stories and updates

xxx


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## jo36

Welcome to all the newbies on this thread. Hope you enjoy the site, keep posting, we all want to know where you are in tx and how things are progressing.

Jo x


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## Maybbaby4

Hi misspie and jo and thanks for the welcome!
I wish you all the best of luck and hope to see loads of BFPs soon!
I am 5 days post 2dET. my test date is 9/7/9-- if I hold out that long!
2WW is so hard! Feel relatively normal but don't know if little niggles are good, bad-- or maybe I'm just imagining them!
Enjoy the sunshine and love and luck to all.
Xxx


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## jo36

Ooh you're one day ahead of me, my test day is the 10th! Was feeling quite confident at the beginning of the week as I was getting 'odd' sensations but now I'm feeling normal and thinking it hasn't worked. Hope I'm wrong. Good luck for the remainder of your 2 ww and really hope its good news for you!!


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## curves angel

Thanks for the warm welcome and good luck wishes everyone. My test date is the 16th, sooooooo long!
i'm already over analyzing EVERTHING!! Back to work tomorrow, hopefully I won't have time to think so much.

Warm Wishes xx


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## BaT

Welcome Curves Angel.

I am also on my first 2WW following a stimulated IUI, OTD is 12th July.  I also am over anaylzing everything- this process is so hard!!!!

Fingers crossed for you

B x


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## lmb15

I'm on my first ivf cycle. started stimulating  my ovaries today, so egg collection should be in 2 weeks. hoping it flies by!!
good luck to those on the 2ww. XXX


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## lesbo_mum

good luck Lisa!!


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## BaT

jo36 said:


> Was feeling quite confident at the beginning of the week as I was getting 'odd' sensations but now I'm feeling normal and thinking it hasn't worked. Hope I'm wrong.


Jo36- I am in the same situation as you today. I was also getting 'odd' sensations earlier in the week but now feel normal so am feeling as though it hasn't worked 

I really hope that we are both wrong.

B x


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## curves angel

Here's hoping everything is OK and it's worked for both of you. I know it's early days for me but i feel no different, I'm sure it hasn't worked.


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## lmb15

Thanks Em.
My IVF's going ok so far. Started stimulating last Thursday and had my first scan today. I've got 13 follicles growing nicely, and 6 tiny ones that may or may not join in on the fun. Next scan Thursday. Hoping i get lots of eggies for me and my recipient, and that they're good quality ones.
My side effects have settled now, though i'm sure i'll get some more from the stimulating!!

How's everyone else doing?

Lisa x


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## welshginge

Newbies Alert!

So here goes - me (29) & partner (36) have been together since 2000 had CP in 2006. Ready to add a 'real' baby to our family (to join the 2 four legged ones). Having DI with anon donor, paying as we can't get anything on NHS in this area as we have no proven fertility problems. I'm the one trying to carry the pregnancy with my one ovary (HSG came out fine thank goodness).

So, I started taking Clomid today (had some weird side affects) & a scan is booked in for next tues so hoping we have one/two good follicles so we can go ahead with the insemination  .  Looking forward to hearing about your stories!!!!


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## Pinktink

Hiii! 

Welcome, just blew you some bubbles to start you off  

Good luck for your next scan, hope you get some lovely follies     

PT xxx


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## kelz2009

welshginge- welcome hun, me and my dp went for stimulated iui with anon donor at lwc, I had bfn on 1st cycle, and lucky we had bfp on 2nd cycle and I am now 6 wks pregnant. 
Really hope clomid works for you and you get bfp. All the best kelz xxx
If I can help you with anything I will be happy to help


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## jo36

Welcome to FF Welshginge! Good luck with your scan next week and the insemination too. Its an emotional rollercoaster of a time but hopefullt you won't have to wait too long until you get your BFP!   

Jo x


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## welshginge

Wow that was quick! Thanks for speedy welcome replies!!! I'm still trying to figure this board out so not sure what bubbles mean but thanks! So nice to hear a success story too - congratulations!!!!


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## leoaimee

hi welshginge!


welcome to ff ... nice to meet you.  really good luck with your up coming tx    

i blew you and JO some bubbles!  (hay jo!)

axxxx


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## jo36

Hay, Aimee thanks!!! Your a hun  

Xx


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## lesbo_mum

Hi Welshginge (love the name BTW!)

Welcome to FF good luck for your tx    

We are doing our first DIY insem tomorrow im so nervous now!


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## curves angel

Welcome welshginge and get ready for the emotional rollercoaster that is TTC!

I've found this site so helpful. Good Luck!

Cx


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## Pepstar

Hi Everyone 

Thought I should introduce us as I am lurking on these boards reading all the very useful information!  I'm 28, my dp is 31 and I will (hopefully!) be the one carrying our child.  We will be self funding DI with anon donor and are most likely going to be doing this at Guys.  

It is all early stages for us - we met our GP on Friday and she was fantastic so now we just have to wait to get all our bloods done and then she will sort out our referral to Guys.

Looking forward to chatting more in the future - good luck everyone


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## jo36

Welcome Pepstar!! Well done on getting over the first hurdle of TTC - the GP appt! You're well on your way now to extending your family... we had DI with IUI and now I am in my 6th week of my second pregnancy. Good luck in your journey and hope to 'see' more of you.

Jo x


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## welshginge

HI Pepstar - I'm a newbie to this site too. Everyone is lovely! The dreaded GP appt has been the worst bit so far - not knowing what they'll say/think etc but glad it went well!! Look forward to chatting in the future!


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## lesbo_mum

welcome pepstar!! Im Emma and my DP is Louise.. im hoping to carry our first child and have our initial consultation at the Esperance booked for 17th September in the meantime we are trying DI using anon sperm from fertility 1st.. im on my first 2ww and am due to test on 28th July.. i dont think its worked this tiime but i figure not to worry its just a trial run


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## MandMtb

welshgine and pepstar, welcome to FF   and good luck on your TTC journeys.

S x


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## whisks

welcome to ff, welshginge & pepstar, good luck with your future treatments.

whisks x


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## Pepstar

Thanks for the welcome everyone.  Step number 2 is now out of the way - both sets of parentals have been told (mine were concerned about my name change and hers were ok).  This is now starting to feel a bit real


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## southern_angel

Am finally plucking up the courage to post after lurking for a couple of years! 

I'm (recently) single (again!) and have decided I'll probably be going it alone now. I'm in my early 30s and conscious of time ticking on (and of my biological clock ticking ever more loudly!). Tentatively planning to start ttc towards the end of the year. I have been looking into various options, currently hoping to use a known donor for diy AI.


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## lesbo_mum

Hi Angelmine

Where about r u from?

I have just done my first DIY AI and my AF is due on Tuesday im 100% its a BFN this time but its helped me and DP to realise that we are actually go back to plan A and use a clinic and try stimulated IUI... just a personal pref we feel as i didnt like doing the AI ourselves..

Goodluck with TTC

Em  & Louise x


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## southern_angel

Hi Em,

Sorry to hear that you're not feeling positive about this cycle, but glad to hear that it's been helpful for you in terms of making decisions about how to move forward... 

I'm not too far from you actually - in a little village on the coast halfway between Portsmouth and Southampton. 

A


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## lesbo_mum

really near me wow thats cool cause everyone else is miles from us  

So is your known donor a friend or someone you have found online? 

Em x


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## southern_angel

Hi Em,

I haven't made final decisions yet... 

I have met a potential donor online who I really like but have yet to meet irl. A friend offered a few years ago but I'm not sure if that still stands, or if it would work (I don't want a donor to co-parent, just to be known, and because my friend is in my life more than a donor would be, I'm not sure if that would be (too) complicated). Still all a bit up in the air... ;-) 

Will you have to wait long for donor sperm at the clinic? 

A


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## lesbo_mum

Hiya,

The wait for sperm depends on which clinic i end up using... the Wessex in southampton had a 2 yr wait   so we looked at the Esperance in Eastbourne who i have an appointment with in September and they have no wait at all i have been told by them and other girls who used them.. also some of the london clinics dont have a wait but they are more costly and further to travel!

We looked online for a donor and heard from loads of blokes but it just didnt feel right to us and we have tried fertility 1st but to be honest it felt a bit seedy and sleezy


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## southern_angel

Hi!

Yes, I'd heard that there was a long wait at the Wessex (which is where I was told I'd be referred a few years ago when I discussed things with my old GP). Great that Esperance doesn't have such a shortage  

I have looked / am looking at clinics as well, but for now trying to find a know donor feels right...


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## lesbo_mum

well good luck and i hope u find him hun 

I've just walked to the postbox and sent off our forms for the Esperance i meant to send them off months ago but put it off as we wanted to try DIY first.


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## welshginge

Thanks.


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## welshginge

I meant to put that on the book suggestions thread.


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## Mini Us

Hi everyone,

We are newbies to FF and have been reading all your posts for a little while now. They have been so encouraging and we thought it was time to join the big family. We are both 30 this year but DP is a few weeks shy and are now ready to extend our family. Have started the preliminary investigations (blood tests etc). We are hoping to both conceive and carry together at the same time by AI/DI. At the moment, DP is waiting for 2 blood test results (CMV and Toxoplasma), I've got all mine but of course don't know what they mean...will take them to the clinic when DP's arrive. DP has had 3D-HyCoSy scan and all is well; tubes open etc. I'll be having mine next month, waiting for my next cycle to start to book the appt. Hoping to both try in Oct. 09 if all goes according to plan.

Mini Us x


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## lesbo_mum

Hi Mini Us,

Welcome to FF!!

We are also hoping to start around the same time as you.. i'll be carrying hopefully and have had a few bloods done and have our initial consultation with the Esperance next month on the 17th... 


Where are you guys from we are from way down on the south coast near portsmouth...

Which clinic will you use?

Em x


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## welshginge

Hi Mini us. I've blown you some bubbles for luck.

Carrying together eh? That's brave. Good luck with your treatment! x


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## Skybreeze

Welcome Mini us

Good luck with both Journeys!! 

Natalie xxx


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## Mini Us

Hi all...

Thank you for all your messages and sorry it's taken us this long to respond - work  

Em - How exciting that we're trying around the same time. We are in London and will be using the Bridge Centre. Enjoy your holiday and good luck for the 17th, I'll be having my 3D-HyCoSy scan the same day.

welshginge - Thanks for the bubbles  

Natalie - Thank you  

Update: So we went to the GP to get DP's remaining 2 blood results and were told that the pathology lab missed them in the form from the doctor so she had to go back and do the test on the 21/08. I mean how can you miss something like that....there were 3 tests in the extra investigations section of the form and they did the one in the middle and managed to miss the one above and below it!   She called the GP on Wednesday and was told that the doctor hasn't looked at the results so she can't pick them up. She called again on Thursday and was told the doctor's seen them and everything's a-ok. Went on Friday to pick them up and was told that she has to come and see a different doctor who needs to sanction release of results! So she's booked an appointment to see our own doctor who requested the tests as we don't really want to start dealing with a different doctor - so that's on the 11th. 

My period came a day early   so I booked my HyCoSy and that'll be on the 17th after which we have a consultation to discuss treatment plan on the 22nd. All things being equal, we can begin early October (me) and late October (DP). Fingers (& toes) crossed!


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## Mama+Mummy

Hi all,

Been reading for a while now and following everyones posts, think its about time i introduced myself  Myself and DP have been together 2 yrs and have decided to start TTC Baby #1 through DIY AI with a known donor. (Ill be carrying).

Inseminated 5x over 5 days, CD 11 - CD 15, using a 'instead' cup. Now on CD 16.

All fingers and toes are crossed, although sometimes i think to myself, its only our first month TTC, of course it wont happen. 

Nice to be able to talk to others that are going thru the same thing. So a huge hello to everyone!!!

Amber xx

P.s. Can i anyone tell me how i change the info on the bottom, like the 'signature' as such?


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## welshginge

Hey AmberKirsty & welcome to the boards! I've been using these boards for a wee while now & find it very helpful for knowledge & support. 

To change your signature go to profile (when you're logged in) and click forum profile information (on your left) & there's a box called 'signature', fill in & click change profile.

Also welcome to the 2WW, don't let it drive you   . Good luck!


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## Damelottie

Welcome AmberKirsty


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## Mama+Mummy

Thanks welshginge, got it sorted now  I think.. lol  

The 2WW is going to drive me round the bend, im far too impatient!!  AF is due around the 19th so if the witch hasnt turned up by then it will be time to POAS. I have very high hopes..

How is everyone else doing?? Thanks for the welcome Lottie 

Amber xx


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## Expats

Hello everybody,

This is our 1st post here, hopefully the beginning of a long and fruitful "relationship" with FF.
I will give a quick overview of our situation, and the fire away with a couple of questions.

Me - 31 y.o. female, Australian & Irish, residing in the Middle East (laws are VERY restrictive here, so I am conscious of masking identity).
DP - 35 y.o. female, Australian, also living in the ME
We've been a couple for > 8 years, families are very supportive & we are financially comfortable.


By the end of 2010, we will hopefully have moved out of the ME, and across to Ireland, or back to Australia.
We would like to obtain anonymous sperm donation (considered and rejected the bro-in-law option) from a 'bank' towards the end of next year for natural DI.
We like the idea of anonymity until the child is 18, and then the child chooses if s/he'd like to pursue identifying the donor.
We will likely carry 1 child each (considered and rejected the idea of egg-swapping), and then seek to adopt a baby from a list of 3 or 4 particularly poor counties to which we have affinity. We would prefer to have both our names on the birth cert, but the board is very UK-centric and I am not sure if this is possible elsewhere.

In Australia and Ireland, we cannot become CP's. Not yet.
Access to fertility treatments are also limited in those 2 countries for us.
Where would be the best place for us to begin this process?
What age considerations are there for my DP @ 35 y.o?

Thanks in advance for any tips, comment, support etc, and a general appreciation to all who contribute regularly to this board and make it the oracle that it has clearly evolved to become. ;o)


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## toots6574

hi my names lynsey and myself and ann marie have been together for nearly 5 yrs ttc for 3 yrs we have just had our first attempt at iui at ninewells unsuccessful !!!  

its so hard trying not to feel disappointed would love to hear from anyone else in the same boat as us 

its so hard to find people in same boat as us noone is interested or take us seriously 
lynsey

ps lots of luck to you all


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## ajacklin

Hi everyone.
As the title suggests I am new to the site, I am a gay male from Nottingham and I have been with my partner for nine years now. I think we are in the ideal position to offer a child a home, preferably through surrogacy. I am looking for any advice as to where to start looking for a surrogate, is it necessary to use a agency, what costs might be involved? e.t.c
I have looked at some surrogacy options, mostly abroad but it all seems rather expensive, I appreciate that a child is a big financial commitment but I can't help thinking that the money would be better spent on the child's upbringing and education.
Anyhow please let me know of any information you might see relevant.
Thank you in advance.


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## Damelottie

Hello AmberKirsty - Have you found the other 2ww boards on here? This is the general one:

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=27.0

And this is the LGBT one

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=205119.msg3275090#new 

Welcome Expats  - I hope you find FF useful

Welcome ajacklin - Good luck with your journey to parenthood . Have you also found the general surrogancy board on FF? Its here:

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=57.0

We also have an Ask a Lawyer thread here for any questions related

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=216.0

Good luck all  

LL xxx


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## welshginge

A very warm welcome to all the newbies!!!!


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## lesbo_mum

wowsers lots of newbies while i have been away!! Hi to all and welcome be nice to chat to you all soon come and join us on the general chat thread.. i have a weeks worth of gossip to catch up on and i hope to find some BFP's ladies


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## schnozzles

everyone

Just joined today - (civil) partner and I have decided to go for it and try for kids. She doesn't want to carry and I have classic broody pregnancy dreams so I'll be the one getting poked and prodded   Hoping to get IUI on the NHS if we can, to be honest I haven't even been to the doctor yet but I wanted to get as much info as I could beforehand so I know where I stand legally, what questions to ask, what to expect etc

I'm 38 so I know I've left it a bit late but better late than never, hopefully!!

If anyone in Leicestershire has been through this I'd love to know what I might expect from our PCT?


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## welshginge

Hey Schnozzles! Welcome to the boards. I live in Leicestershire too & our PCT is a right pain! They don't fund IUI & their IVF policy tries to exclude everyone (including us). But if you find out anything different, let me know. I'm undergoing IUI at Leicester Fertility Clinic & it's £900 per cycle inc sperm. There are other clinics in the surrounding areas, do your research before you decide. There's also egg sharing at some clinics which you then get your IVF free or cheaper but unsure of the criteria (i've not gone down this route as I only have 1 ovary so unlikely to be accepted as a sharer).

Sorry if I've overwhelmed you so soon into your journey!


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## schnozzles

Thanks for the heads up, will let you know if I get anywhere.


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## lmb15

Snozzles - we're  in Leicester too. If you meet the criteria (if neither of you have ever had kids, plus a few other things) you should be entitled to nhs funding. Not sure on their same sex couple policy. At the minute there's no wait at all to be seen at the Assisted Conception Unit at the Leicester Royal Infirmary, and they've got loads of sperm too. (they supply to other clinics as well cos they've got so much!) You get 1 ivf cycle on the nhs, and then get subsequent frozen embryo cycles free if you've had enough embryos to freeze some on your 1st attempt, and if your 1st ivf is unsuccessful.

We went privately cos didn't want to wait for nhs funding (we started our journey just over a year ago). We went to Nurture in Nottingham, which has the best success rates outside of London, and is about 3rd in the country. The ACU in Leicester doesn't have great stats, but that's because they have nhs as well as private, so can't pick and choose their patients, unlike the private clinics!! We loved the people at Nurture, so went there (didn't look round Leicester cos didn't know until recently about how skewed their figures are due to the type of patients they take on. The consultant that runs it - Janine Elson - is lovely though). 

We had our first ivf cycle in june/july - i did egg sharing, so the actual ivf was free, we just paid for the sperm and the drugs (which were discounted). Unfortunately, Nurture (and most other clinics, if not all clinics) have an upper age limit of 35 for egg share, so you wouldn't be eligible. 


It's a very expensive game trying to get pregnant. It can also be a bit stressful. Try the NHS route, you may as well, and then choose a clinic with good results, and more importantly, who you feel comfortable with.

Best of luck!!

Lisa x

ps. i can't help with IUI experiences, cos we went straight for IVF - but if you've got any queries about the IVF process feel free to ask.


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## HotChickies

Hi, am new to this site....so don't know if I'm doing this right.

If all goes to plan my girlfriend will be having her first IUI treatment at LWC in Darlington next week. We are both very excited about this, and can't wait. We are hoping and praying that this treatment works 

x


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## lesbo_mum

welcome hotchickies... think i spoke to you a BC and pointed you to this site  

Jump on the LGBT general chat thread i know a few of the girls used Darlingtons LWC, Cardiff LWC and come used London's LWC.. infact most of the girls on here used the LWC at one of the centres.


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## HotChickies

Yes...we're the ones from BC. Will have a look on the general chat sites. Hoping to find someone else who's gone to LWC Darlington, although so far we've only had +ve experience there....and hope it continues  

x


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## lesbo_mum

i def know theres a few girlies who have used them but cant remember who im sure they'll pop along soon


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## tor.t

Hey all, back on here again after my last failed attempt in March. Everything has gone so well this time had ET last Thursday, does anyone know if I can test earlier than 14 days? Mine and my partners 3rd attempt now with ICSI. Wishing you all the best xxx


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## lmb15

tor.t - i tested 10 days after a day 2 transfer and got a bfp. My test date was 16 days after transfer but i couldn't wait that long!! I tested about 8 days after transfer to make sure the hcg trigger shot was out of my system (got a bfn, so it was), that way i knew that if i tested early and it was a bfp then it really was one!
Best of luck,
Lisa x


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## winny and bp

HELLOOOO!  Newbies to the site here!    We're just starting out on the exciting route of trying to be parents...we've been referred to the local hospital (James Cook Uni Hospital in Middlesbrough), we're trying the NHS route after hearing about several local couple being successful, so fingers crossed!
We did think about the Darlington LWC and that remains our back-up plan.  Looking forward to chatting/meeting up with others in similar situations  
Lisa and Rachel


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## lesbo_mum

Hi Lisa and Rachel,

Welcome to FF!!

Theres a few girls on here who have managed to get NHS funding from there PCT's which is fab... mine couldnt/ wouldnt help us so we are going private to the Esperance in Eastbourne for Donor IUI... my cycle starts on sunday and im taking clomid from days 2 -6 then having a scan on day 9.. then who knows what next lol depends how my follies look...

come and just onto the general chat thread theres lots of us girlies on there having treatment, bumps and planning still.

Em x


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## HotChickies

Hi Lisa and Rachel

We are new to this site too. We are going through the LWC Darlington, and are having our first IUI tomorrow. 

We have thought about going through NHS, but my g/f is in her mid 30's and were worried that the longer we have to wait, the less chance she'll have of conceiving.

Since our first appointment at the clinic, it has taken about 6 weeks to get to the point of having out first treatment. We were notified of a possible donor match on the same day of our initial consultation. 

I can't believe that the process has gone by so quickly...the only down side is that we've now got to pay the bill!! 

Hope all goes well for you both


xx


----------



## winny and bp

Thanks for the warm welcome guys  

Maybe they won't help us at James Cook but we reckoned it was worth a shot since others have been successful!

Em, we're still getting to grips with the terminology so we may as a few questions here and there - LOL! Sounds like things are really moving for you though which is so exciting!

6 weeks, HotC?? OMG! That is fab! It's the waiting that will kill us I'm sure but it'll be worth it however it happens


----------



## lesbo_mum

Winny- the slang takes a bit of getting used to but its easy to pick up.. We didnt even take 6 weeks to get started our intitial consultation was 17th sept and our cycle starts hopefully 27th sept if AF (Period) plays ball!

Em x


----------



## Steph29

Hi lisa & Rachel  

Welcome to ff im sure you will find everything you need on here.

emma/stephx


----------



## terriandkaty

Hey everyone, 

My partner and I have decided to try for our own little sprogs!   I (terri = poster) will be carrying as katy my partner has no desire to carry. We have decided to ttc in January, we have started to chart my cycles and I have started to take supplements. We haven't found a donor just yet but hoping we will in the next month or so. We are thinking of trying AI at home first of all and then if that fails after 6 months or so we will go into clinics. Im finding myself getting more broody (if thats even possible?!) as each day passes! wish we could start now! lol 

I am 23 and so is my partner we have known each other since we were 16 and we have our 6 year anniversary in March next year! we are just hoping for a little miracle of our own


----------



## HotChickies

Welcome to FF. Been with my partner about 3 1/2 years. Had our first IUI yesterday, so on our 2 week wait before testing.

Hope you manage to find a donor, and you are successful. Good luck  

xx


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Terri and Katy,

Welcome to FF!!

Me and my partner have been together about 4 years and had our civil partnership last November.... we are due to start our first cycle of IUI on sunday hopefully if my AF (period) shows up!

Em x


----------



## terriandkaty

Thankyou for the warm welcome! 

Hotchicks: Thankyou, goodluck for this month!   how did you find the IUI? has I have heard its quite painful?

lesbo_mum: Thankyou, I hope you have the IUI on sunday! and that you are successful! goodluck!  

I really wish we could start now lol


----------



## kelz2009

Hi Terriandkaty,

I have been with my partner for 7yrs, We had iui at Lwc swansea and are very lucky to have got pregnant on our 2nd iui. Im 16 weeks pregnant with triplets. 
Iui is a little uncomfortable but cant say it really hurts!!!! But its worth everything when you get bfp.

All the best with your treatment kelz xxxxx


----------



## HotChickies

My girlfriend tells me that the procedure didn't hurt. She felt a bit uncomfortable for the rest of the day, but after this she has been fine.

We've now just got to wait 2weeks for the outcome...

xx


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi

I dont have my IUI on sunday i just start my drugs etc... wont have IUI for a few weeks yet..

Im really scared about the procedure  

Em x


----------



## Magic3s

Hi everyone,

Have been reading the forum for years but never got the courage to register   .As you can see in my signature we aren't exactly new to all this but quite a long time passed since our last try and just decided to try it again. The first two cycles we had at LWC. First I egg shared-well was going to egg share but the clinic had to cancel the cycle due to hyper-stimulation. I had over 40 follicles  and was in agonising pain. I didn't want to go through the hells of IVF again- being a needle phobic- so opted for IUI. Which unfortunately ended with BFN about 1,5 year ago.
This time around we have decided to go abroad as have a very tight budget.  Tiny twist is that it seems i might have endometriosis but can not be sure about it until they do laparoscopic surgery. I have been in a lot of pain in the last 8-10 month and when finally gone to see GP in august they found a cyst on my right ovary. Everyone thought that that caused the pain until my last ultrasound revealed that it has disappeared but i am still in pain.  Kind of good and bad news at the same time. Well anyway I am looking forward to surgery because we can't start treatment until the cause of pain is discovered and hopefully solved! 
The waiting list is very long on the NHS even to get to see a gynaecologist who could refer me for surgery so will have the lap abroad at the clinic where we are planning to have DIUI hopefully early next year. 
Anyway just wanted to say hello! 

Bimbo


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Bimbo,

Welcome to FF!! Good luck for your tx!

We're have DIUI at the moment and our 2ww started yesterday!

Em x


----------



## Magic3s

Hi Em, 

It is so exciting, wish you good luck!   Have you had a medicated cycle, how many follicles have you got? I remember I hardy move during my 2ww, poor partner had to do everything for me   
I keep my fingers crossed for you!  

xx Bimbo


----------



## lesbo_mum

yeah i did a medicated cycle with clomid and pregnyl for trigger.. i had 3 follies but on day of trigger they were 16mm, 13mm and 14mm so if any of these were good eggs i think its gonna be the 16mm as the others were too small...


----------



## Magic3s

Fingers crossed you will have a BFP  I just realised you are not far from us, we live about a half an hour from portsmouth.

Good luck!


----------



## have_a_go

Hi Guys

Like some others, i have been following fr a few weeks but just now posted.

Me and my partner have been together for 5 years and had our Civil Partnership in July 06. Bev already has 2 kids from a previous relationship some 30 years ago. Thay are all grwn up and lovely. I have no children of my own...yet. We TTC last month through a Home Insem (hotel Insem!). Nothing happened as i found out that i had not ovulated last month due to and implant that i had taken out in aug.

After that experience we decided to go with the esperance and had our app on friday. All good with one follicle growing nicely. Doc said that as i did not ovulate last month there was no cert that i would ovulate this month even tho the follie was a god sign. Well..just tested and got a OPK + so have rang donor and we are going to meet tommorrow. Does anyone know if thats too late??

Hello to you all by the way....

Dawn


----------



## lesbo_mum

Bimbo- We're not actually from portsmouth we live in waterlooville, but my mum lives in Gosport and thats where i grew up..

have_a_go- Im a Esperance girl... we're with Dr Chui.. he's amazing... had our first IUI on Saturday. If you got your positive OPK late last night today is a good time to insem. I've spoken to you before havent i


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome Bimbo and Have_a_go


----------



## Steph29

Welcome to FF Bimbo and Have a go.


----------



## Magic3s

Hi Steph29,

Congratulations to your BFP!  We have been thinking about me having DP's embryos but as she is butch the examinations and egg collection would be a hell for her, so decided to go down the "easy" route. Which I am a bit sorry about because would love to have kids with my DP's looks but hey-ho. She is my honeybunny and I know she would do anything for me but I don't want to make her do something  that she is not a 100% comfortable with. But can't wait to see her pushing our baby around.The other day we were babysitting for a friend and she looked incredibly sexy with the pram!  OK maybe not sexy but soooo cute! 

Bimbo


----------



## have_a_go

Hi

Em - Yes we have spoken before, last week i mailed you to discuss that god awful counciller!! Yes Dr Chui was great our plan as far as esperance and IUI is concerned was to wait til i get a OPK + and then go for nat IUI the month later (so nov cycle now!). However we have a nice donor that we met online 3/4 months ago. We have met up with him a number of times and he is really nice, so we decided to go back to london tonight to do another insem! Glad to say all went well! He is a real sweetie, he even wrapped the sample pot in tissue to keep it warm and out of the light!! So glad to say that we join you guys on the 2ww!! Ahhhhhh! 
Also a tip for others on the 2ww...i have found some highly sensetive HPT on amazon. They are mini pee sticks and pick up 10mgu of HCG which apparently can be detected as soon as a week after conception! They may not work but the ovulation test kits of the same brand do work so there is a good chance that they do and they don't break the bank! (aprox £5 for 10)

Hope you are all well..hi to you too Steph.

Dawn


----------



## lesbo_mum

Dawn,

Say away from the pee sticks you naughty girl   I've been put off testing early as you hear so many people picking up chemical pregnancys.. i'd rather not know.. also i ended up spending nearly £200 last time on HPT's   So me a DP have promised to stay away until OTD this time.... 


Good luck for this cycle hope you get your BFP.

Em x


----------



## have_a_go

Em

what's a chemical pregnancy? and the pineapple and brazil nuts is that a rumour?

Dawn


----------



## lesbo_mum

Its a m/c that happens really early on.. most women dont pick up on them as there so early but if your testing early you could pick up on it and get excited cause you think you have done it... only to find on OTD that its actually a neg.

Loads of girls on here swear by the pineapple juice (not from concentrate & no actual fruit flesh as thats not good!) and the brazil nuts... its suppose to help with the lining and implatation... I have done it this month and the clinic said my lining my good so it may have helped with that... Obvious dont know if its helped with implantation...


----------



## newleaf

Hello Friends I have soon to meet!

I am an American living in London, age 39. Like so many of you, I have a fertility issue, brought on by myself really.

At age 19 I gave birth to a stillborn boy at 6 months pregnant. About 6 years later, after I got married, and miscarried again at 10 weeks. My left overy was covered in large cysts and I needed to have it removed. At that time, my husband told me he didn't want children and I had a tubal ligation during the same procedure to remove my ovary. 
Shortly thereafter I was widowed.

Luckily, I got a second chance at love, this time with a wonderful woman who I have been with for the past 6 years. She has been through menopause, and we would like to have a child.

I am investigating all options at this point, because I will be 40 in the next few months.

One of my main fears is that in my early 30's I took roaccutane for acne. I don't know what that will bring.

In any case, thank you for allowing me to introduce myself and I look forward to hearing from you all.
To be honest, I am so new I don't even know what procedure would be right for me. I'll keep posting!

NewLeaf


----------



## Lexx

Hello,

New here obviously. I am currently at uni training to be a social worker but plan to start TTC asap after qulified. I am single and have absultly no intention of changing that and would be doing the getting pregnant and mummy thing myself. Is there anyone else out there that did the same? 

Anyway just wanted to say hello.


----------



## Damelottie

Hello Lexx

Welcome to FF  

We also have a quite a busy singles board. You're more than welcome on there/here/both/anywhere on FF really 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=403.0

I'm single and have a 12 week old little boy 

LL x


----------



## Guest

hello everyone... just thought I'd say a quick hello. My partner & I are new to this and to the site. Pleased to see a LGBT forum  ...I've been reading through and it  all looks really useful and welcoming. 

we're currently undergoing some initial tests and have been referred to a clinic for DIUI on the NHS. We live in Wales/ Cymru... is there anybody else from Wales? hello shw mae?.

all the best , suku x


----------



## Mini Us

Welcome suku


----------



## cathy.9

Hi,
Iv just joined and live in Cheshire. i have a 3 yr old son from a previous realtionship and will be trying to concieve artificially at home soon. I have been with my girl friend for a year now


----------



## leoaimee

hi cathy9

welcome to FF!

good luck with the home insems!

ax


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome Cathy9 x


----------



## lesbo_mum

welcome cathy9! Goodluck with your home insems


----------



## M2M

Hello everyone! 

I'm new here. I'm 27 and my partner is 30. After being unsuccessful in the adoption process, we have decided to look into the possibility of having a baby by donor insemination. I would be the one TTC. We've recently been to the Inseminar at the London Women's Clinic, which we found very interesting. Unfortunately we don't live anywhere near London, which is a real shame as we had a very good feeling about the clinic.

I'm sure I'll learn loads by reading your posts on here. Can't wait to find out more.


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome to all the newbies  

I hope the board helps you with your journeys, I find it incredibly supportive and the people on here are lovely! 

Angel

ps: Lexx - I'm in a similar situation to you, although have started trying now. Feel free to ask any questions!


----------



## lmb15

M2M - where abouts do you live? If you're in the Midlands, i would recommend Nurture in Nottingham. Good luck! x


----------



## M2M

lmb15 said:


> M2M - where abouts do you live? If you're in the Midlands, i would recommend Nurture in Nottingham. Good luck! x


I'm in the East Riding of Yorkshire.


----------



## yvonnet

Hi my name is Yvonne

My partner and I have been looking for a sperm donor for three years now and believe that we may have found the right person!
I would like to share what we have learnt and been through along the way and although it seems a little daunting at this stage I will try to wright about our feelings as we go down the route of using a sperm donor!

Don't know if this is where i should post maybe someone can advise!

Wishing everyone a happy and exciting New Year

Yvonne


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Yvonne 

come and join us on the LGBT general chat thread..

How did you find oyur donor?

Em x


----------



## Nic&#039;n&#039;Lau

Hey there,

Wow .. this is all a bit daunting.  My name is Nicola, I'm married to an amazing woman called Laura and we've been investigating various options over the last year.  It works out I'm not suitable for IUI ,  we decided against donor insemination because of the legal grey areas and the emotional issues .... and I've been on the IVF program since 21st December 09.  All a bit new and scary right now and am LOVING the headaches I'm getting from the Synarel.  Got my baseline scan on Thursday.

I was really nervous about writing about myself on the other forums as I've seen some horrid comments from people on other sites about how lesbians don't deserve to have children.  Its so hurtful.  Didn't think i could handle receiving abuse from narrow minded biggots like that... It seems like this thread is full of nice people though so would be great to chat to others in our situation 

Good luck to you all for BFPs in 2010  

nic x


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Nic,

Welcome to FF... there are lots of gays on here so you'll fit right in!

I've had 2 IUI and had no luck yet so dont worry that you've gone straight to IVF.. your success rates are much better just think of it that way  

Come and join us on the general LGBT thread...

Good luck for this cycle do you know when egg collection is?

Em x


----------



## Nic&#039;n&#039;Lau

Hey Em,

Our doctor was against IUI from the start.  He said that frozen sperm just isn't mobile enough so he was suggesting IVF from the word go.  When I had my Hysterosalpingogram there was no spill from either side and no tube showing on one side so the chances of it ever working were ridiculously slim.  So I'm going to trust the universe that if we're meant to have a family we will... i think it would be too easy for me to over-analyse everything and get myself in a tizwoz... which would only hamper things.  

Will get over to the general thread after this post.... egg collection would be around 18th this month if the baseline scan on Thursday says i have down regulated.  Keeping everything crossed!

Spikayou on the general thread,

Nic x


----------



## lesbo_mum

I havent had a HSG yet and i'm beginning to think i should have!

Which clinic you with? I only ask as the first clinic i spoke to said they wouldnt bother with IUI as its not great... I'm now with the Esperance and we're on a break at the moment... supposed to have our follow up on the 14th Jan but thinking about postponing for a few more month to lose more weight.

Em x


----------



## Nic&#039;n&#039;Lau

Awww .... yeah, our clinic wouldn't even let us start any treatment without one.  We are with Bourn Hall near Cambridge - the founding fathers of IVF apparently.  First IVF baby was conceived there.  

The HSG isn't the nicest thing in the world. if you do decide to have one I would seriously suggest getting one at the earliest possible date in your cycle before the cervix starts softening around the time of ovulation.  If there are blockages it can apparently clear them too... so worth a look if you've had unsuccessful IUI.  Cost us around £280 but I guess every hospital will be different.  

Anywhoo .... computer games , cuppa and a piece of chocolate beckon so hope to catch you again later!!  Maybe you can tell me about your experiences so far.  What have you had so far?  What sort of donor are you using? 

Nic x


----------



## HotChickies

Welcome to all new people  

M2M - Just read your posts that you are based in East Yorkshire.

My partner and I have been having treatment at the London Women's Clinic in Darlington, and have just had a BFP from IVF. They have been really good, so you could try there as it's not too far away from you. 

xx


----------



## Damelottie

Hopeful Nic  
Welcome to you and Laura

xxxx


----------



## Nic&#039;n&#039;Lau

Howdie LadyLottie 
No doubt will get to speak to you online in other areas.  Its all so exciting 
xx


----------



## denni769

Hello
Just wanted to say a quick hello to everyone again, we're still trying to find our way around the site and must admit am being a little slow.....so thank you again for messages we have received so far, and looking foward to getting to know people

Laura


----------



## lynz26

Hello everyone,

This is my first post and it feels a little strange. I can see how welcoming everyone is on this forum and would love to share our progress.

My partner (36 / CP 200 and I (30) have decided to start a family and have been to our GP to get our referral underway. The GP is helping us with the blood tests to speed up the process. We are looking to get IVF treatment at Nurture - Nottingham and have booked to attend an open evening later on this month. We have been advised to use IVF due to the better success rates.

This will be our very first attempt but I have a significant amount of weight that I need to shed before we can begin (as I will be the one TTC). We are also keen to participate in the Egg share Programme.

We are very hopeful for the future and reading some of the amazing stories on this forum reassure us that it can happen!

Thanks for reading my ramble - Lynz26


----------



## lmb15

*Lynz* - We had IVF at Nurture in summer last year. We were very lucky and it worked first time. We also did egg share. They're such a lovely clinic and also have amazing success rates (60% with IVF, top 3 in the country). It's quite a small unit so you feel like you're being treated as a person and not just another statistic. I could rave about them all day long, but i won't! 
Once you've been accepted onto egg share (all bloods normal, done genetic questionnaire etc) it takes about 6 weeks to match you to a recipient. Not sure how long the wait is for sperm at the minute, but we got it within 6 weeks too.
Where about do you live? We're in Leicester, so the drive for scans etc was ok, only took about 35mins. Which is good when you have to be there at 7am!!!
Best of luck with it all. Any questions about Nurture/egg share/IVF just ask away.

Lisa x


----------



## M2M

lynz26 said:


> Hello everyone,
> 
> This is my first post and it feels a little strange. I can see how welcoming everyone is on this forum and would love to share our progress.
> 
> My partner (36 / CP 200 and I (30) have decided to start a family and have been to our GP to get our referral underway. The GP is helping us with the blood tests to speed up the process. We are looking to get IVF treatment at Nurture - Nottingham and have booked to attend an open evening later on this month. We have been advised to use IVF due to the better success rates.
> 
> This will be our very first attempt but I have a significant amount of weight that I need to shed before we can begin (as I will be the one TTC). We are also keen to participate in the Egg share Programme.
> 
> We are very hopeful for the future and reading some of the amazing stories on this forum reassure us that it can happen!
> 
> Thanks for reading my ramble - Lynz26


I think you will be booked onto the same NURTURE open evening that we're going to!  I'm glad to see there'll be some other same-sex couples there as I was worried we'd be the only one (though when we went to the LWC London open evening there wasn't a man in sight! ).

So we will see you there...


----------



## lynz26

Thank you all for your supportive words!

lmb15 - Glad to hear that your nurture experience was successful on the first attempt. I hope that we are as lucky and wish you all the best for the coming months X

M2M - It's reassuring to know that we will not be the only ones there. Is it on the 19th? we're getting really excited / anxious about the whole process.

Will look forward to meeting you  

Lyndsay


----------



## M2M

lynz26 said:


> M2M - It's reassuring to know that we will not be the only ones there. Is it on the 19th? we're getting really excited / anxious about the whole process.


Yep, it's on the 19th, which also happens to be my birthday.  It may sound crazy to spend the evening of my birthday at a clinic open evening but I can't think of a better way to start my 28th year than with the prospect of a baby on the horizon. 

I look forward to meeting you both!


----------



## greensong

Hi, 
I've just registered on the site ..hello!! Although I've looked at posts regularly over the past 18 months.
About me - been ttc for just under 2 years. We started home insemination  - the donor was a friend, but after 8 attempts we decided get professional help.
I'm 40 and DP is 48 so it really is trying to get last orders in before the bar closes !!
Last year I had 2 unsuccessful donor IUIs and in Nov 09 1st IVF. BFP in December but at my 8 week scan on Friday we discovered I'd had a mc - disguised by the prog pessaries which prevented bleeding. 
In next few weeks I'll either have natural mc or ERPC if not.

It's v upsetting but from looking on message board on the site, I haven't been through anything compared to some women. Pleased I've joined and hope to go for another IVF in the Spring.


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome Greensong


----------



## pem

Hey Greensong - Welcome hun, so so sorry for the loss of your little one, you will get fantastic support on here...

With my 2nd mc i mc naturally about a week after stopping the pessaries, with my first mc I had to have an ERPC. Neither were too bad physically but it is so so tough to lose that precious little life, sending you lots and lots of   , look after yourself and DP..

We are attempting a natural FET in April with our one little frostie so we may be cycling 2getha..

 again..pem x


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome Greensong  

I'm sorry to hear you've had such a sad time  

A lot of us on this board are   that 2010 will be our year, I hope it will prove to be a successful one for you too...

Angel


----------



## Debbie&#039;s Wife

Hi everyone  

I'm Emma (22) from Bognor Regis in West Sussex. I'm not actively TTC at the moment as DP (23) and I are saving up for our CP later on this year and then hopefully saving up for TTC is the next step.

Some might say its a little early for me to be thinking about this (especially my mum), but I know I need to be thinking well in advance as there's lots to plan (and a fair bit of weight to loose lol).

I'm not yet sure which TTC route we will want to take when the time comes, sometimes I'm swayed towards finding a donor and trying it at home to see if we have any luck then moving on to a clinic if we don't have any success, the main worries we have about this is finding the donor etc. On the other hand I also sway towards going straight to IVF if we can bring the cost down by egg sharing (although I have no idea if I would be a suitable candidate). If anyone has any advice/ why you decided on the route you have taken I'd be really interested.

I'm looking forward to posting more later x


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Emma  

Small world!!! Hope you and Debs are all ok  

Feel free to join us on the general chat thread... you'll find all the girls on here are a fountain off knowledge and i started posting on her over a year before we started TTC to gather info so we knew which path to take...

As you already know from my hours of boring you we have tried 2 IUI's at a clinic and not had much luck and i'm currently trying to shift some weight before thinking about moving forward any further.

You will find a real mixture of girls on here who have either done IUI, IVF, egg sharing, carrying the other partner's eggs and so on along with people who have found their own known donor to those who have tried fertility 1st and using anon sperm. So whatever you guys end up doing someone on here will be able to tell you about their experience.

Big Hugs

Em and Lou


----------



## Debbie&#039;s Wife

Big hugs to you too  

Ok I'll jump over to the chat thread now


----------



## leoaimee

hi all the newbies ....

there are lots and lots of lovely new peeps.  wishing you all BFPs in 2010


----------



## BobnBetty

Hi, decided (at last) to write something as we have been lurking for months and are following everyones progress.

I am 34, my DP is 41.  We have been attending LWC Swansea and after 3rd IUI I am 6 weeks pregnant!!  Our first scan at LWC is next Friday, we are excited and nervous  

My due date is 09th September, 2010, so hopefully 2010 will be our year.

We have been following the threads and have been happy and sad for you all.  Your conversation and sharing of symptoms have been a lifeline for us.  Thank you all.


----------



## pem

Hey..

massive congrats Bobnbetty (love that name!) Heres to a happy and healthy pregnancy...


----------



## BobnBetty

Thanks a lot Pem. Your little girl is so cute and her name is lovely! Bob and Betty are our dogs; we thought we would borrow the names! Look forward to chatting to everyone.


----------



## Lumi

Hello  

I feel a bit bad joining the forum now that we (gf is carrying) have a BFP but my gf has been looking for years - we began treatment back in 2004 at LWC starting with IUIs, then stimmed IUIs, then two egg share, then another IUI at another clinic (Exeter) and finally our own dedicated IVF (Exeter). What I like about this forum though as opposed to other places to go and get support, opinions etc is that everyone on here has been down the clinic route - and of course this forum has this section!
So hello and thanks for being here!
Lumi


----------



## denni769

Hello to BobnBetty and Lumi and of course congratulations to you x

Greensong....Hoping 2010 brings you great things

And hello to Els1987


Laura and Mel x


----------



## fallenangel101

hey guys, so my girlfriend and I have been discussing having a baby for some time now so I approached the subject with my doctor this morning, and I suppose it's part of her job, but she wasn't very encouraging, in fact, she was more into trying to encourage us to adopt!
She did say that she can get us a referral to the IVF unit, but again said that there is only a 30% chance of success, and she also doesn't know if they have a certain number of allocations for same sex couples or if you are all in the same waiting list, she left me feeling very deflated although everything she told me I already knew!
So I think we'll go for the referral and see what they say but more and more we're considering the Diers Klinik.
But here's a question too, there's potentially someone who would be willing to donate his sperm to us, in this case how do things work, would we have to do this through our doctors/IVF unit, please help lol it's such a minefield!


----------



## lesbo_mum

Hi Fallenangel,

Welcome to FF!!

I found my dr 's not too helpful also but the clinic have been much more helpful.

A couple of the girls on here have looked at diers klink... Misspie will know more and i think Bimbo may be using them  

as for your poss known donor you dont have to go down the IVF route if you dont want to / need to.... you can always do the good old DIY so long as he is all tested.

Also i should add 30% for IVF is rather low some clinics offer in the high 50's... So if IVF is for you def research some diff clinics and prices etc.

Em x


----------



## denni769

Hi Fallenangel

I wouldn't get to upset about your GP. I think it comes as a shock to them all when a same sex couple walk in and ask about fertility treatment. Our GP sat opened mouthed for 2 minutes before she gave us her very limited imput. Basically if you want to use a clinic then they pretty much all operate privately and all you need is a brief referal letter from your GP. We used a clininc quite a long way from us because of their success rates and ethical practices. If you find a clinic you want to use get the details of the doctor you need to be refered to and ask your GP to do it. You dont have to be refered to the nearest clinic to you.

Using a known donor can become quite tricky with the issue of parental rights and stuff. The advantage of anonymous donors and clinics is that your partner can be the legal parent of the child from the start. Obviously the home method is cheaper and proably less stressful on your body and mind. If parental responsibilities aren't your biggest issue then maybe its the route for you. 

Once you figure out what is the right way for you then go for it. We were super lucky and it worked for us on the 1st round of IVF.

Its quite a journey

Take care Mel and Laura x


----------



## Magic3s

Hi Fallenangel101,

We looked at the Diers Klinik as well, but that is midwife run clinic and because they use ID release donors is much more expensive than the one we had IUI last week. Is the Copenhagen fertility centre and they use anonymous donors so we will never find out the identity and it only costs about £300, well altogether we have spent about £800-£900 with everything included but you would pay more than that in a UK private clinic and at least we had lots of fun and a great minibreak included in the price! 

Wish you best of luck on your journey!

Bimbo


----------



## welshginge

I think the price very much depends on individual clinics. I'm at Leicester Fertility Centre & paying privitely. DIUI is £900 per cycle. 

Bit of a trek for you though Bimbo. x


----------



## Magic3s

I suppose that there are cheaper places as well as more expensive ones. We paid about £1500 at LWC in London in 2008 and were lucky because they were raising prices just before we started treatment, but because we paid in advance we could still have the old prices…
I find it unbelievable that they charge so much for the donor sperm. In Denmark the sperm is about £90/ cycle (although is not ID released which might be a problem for some of you)


----------



## jellybean123

Hi all,

My partner and I have just started trying for our 1st baby. We are using a known donor and inseminating ourselves. We did it for the first time yesterday and today...very exciting!!

Hoping it won't take too long...but we are prepared for the long haul if it does. We've decided that each time we get a bfn we will go out and buy a wee something for the baby that we will eventually conceive!!


----------



## luce87

Hi everyone.  I'm new to ff and this felt like a good place to get started.

I'm a single lesbian, which does end up feeling that you don't really fit in anywhere.  The single women seem to be mostly hetero, and the lesbains all seem to be couples!  I decided that I probably feel more lesbian than single, so here I am!

I have had a few IUI cycles at LWC, and got pregnant but miscarried at 10 weeks.  I then I had 2 cycles of IVF there but I didn't think that IVF really seemed like their thing.  So I've just switched clinics to crgh.  They have recommended GIFT and I'm just waiting for AF to then start a cycle.

So getting stressed that a watched AF never comes! and also anxious about starting on that rollercoaster again.

Has anyone else had GIFT?  I haven't found anyone else who has yet and I'd really like to know what it's like and what kind of recovery time you have.

Luce


----------



## jellybean123

Hi Luce,

Welcome!! There are other single lesbians on this board and everyone is very welcoming.

Can I ask you what GIFT is?


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome Luce!

Another single lesbian here 



luce87 said:


> I'm a single lesbian, which does end up feeling that you don't really fit in anywhere. The single women seem to be mostly hetero, and the lesbains all seem to be couples! I decided that I probably feel more lesbian than single, so here I am!


I know what you mean! I post more here than on the singles board although everyone seems lovely there too.

I hope AF arrives soon and that you can get started with your next cycle (I'm not sure what GIFT is so can't help there I'm afraid, but I'm sure someone will be able to).

Angel


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome Luce.

Post on both theads - then we ALL get to know you


----------



## Strawbs78

Hi everyone

Im not really new as have been here before but have been on a ttc break since late 2008..  DP and I are going to start trying again in April so just wanted to jump on and say hi really.. We are with LWC Harley St so just gearing up for the rollercoaster really that is TTC!..

x


----------



## luce87

Thanks for your welcome!

Angelmine - it's nice to meet another single lesbian.  I was really starting to feel like I was the only one who had ever wanted to be a parent!  I had a bad experience at my previous clinic when, although I had said i was lesbian, it seems that they then assumed I was hetero because I was single and matched me with a donor who had a restriction on his consent saying "no lesbains".  That wasn't part of the information that they gave me so that donor was used on my IVF cycle and I only discovered what had happened when I got a copy of my notes to change clinics!  So it's become a bit of a touchy subject with me.

jellybean - GIFT is where you have stimulation and egg collection like IVF.  But instead of fertilising in the lab they immediately mix the eggs and sperm together and put back into your fallopian tube using laparoscopy.  It's supposed to be better for low AMH when your eggs don't tolerate the manipulation required by IVF so well.  So I've got my fingers crossed although not looking forward to general anaesthetic.

Both of you are doing it a much more natural way than I have been doing - but I don't have a KD.
Good luck to both of you on your 2ww.  I really hope that you both have good news next week.  Fingers crossed.

Luce x


----------



## Me and Her

Hi everyone,

I have posted on other bits of the site but I guess I really should have started here!

My partner and I have been together for 6 years and celebrated our CP last July. We have had tests over the past 6 months to check my fertility as our GP thought that the new NHS policy should alllow f/f couples to get funded treatment. After a lot of waiting around our case (and one other similar couple) was used to test the new policy and they decided not to give us funding. 
Anyway, the tests at least showed no problems and now we are waiting to have our first consultation on Thursday. 

It feels like ages since we started looking into our options - I'm very impatient! However I guess we've still got lots more waiting to do so I'll have to learn to be patient  

Lots of luck to everyone.

E.x


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome


----------



## Nadine75

Hi

I have just started posting on here but have been member for quite a while..ever since my wife and I began fertility treatment about 2 and half years ago. We have had 4 natural cycles, 3 super ovulation and 2 IVF, all negative. Just had 3rd IVF attempt and got a lovely positive result so we are totally thrilled - she is 5 weeks, got loads of symptoms and very high HCG score so am slightly scared that we may have more than one in there!!!
I think i stopped posting on here as i felt like this woudl never happen for us but now it has and we still cannot believe it is actually happening. I know it is very early days but i think we may have just earned the right for a little celebration. 

Good luck to everyone. Looking forward to chatting. 

Nadine x x


----------



## flatbingo

Hello

I'm new to this site but it seems like a fantastic source of support! so am excited to have found it. Me and to be civil partner are starting with a KD in March. I'm very excited and am trying to understand my cycle as much as possible this month to give us the best chance possible in March. I am using Clearblue ovulation predictors and had the smiley face (so cute) this morning. So when does that mean the best time to inseminate is? Not sure whether we should aim for the same day as the smiley face, perhaps the evening or would the following day be better. Any advice greatly appreciated. 

Best of luck to everyone TTC

Michelle

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome Flatbingo! 

This is a lovely site, I hope you'll find it as supportive as I do. I'm also using a KD and I inseminate the evening of the surge and then also the morning after. I think opinion does vary though, I tend to ovulate early morning on the day after the surge so those times feel right to me, but I think some women have a much earlier surge (the smiley face indicates ovulation will occur sometime between 12-36 hours later I think). Are you charting things like your BBT and CM? That can help you pinpoint when you are actually ovulating and help you decide when to insem. 

There are a few posts further down the board on advice on home insems and on using a KD that you might find helpful too. 

Angel


----------



## rosypie

hey strawbs! i remember you well, you were having a break weren't you, redundancies and other horrible stuff? glad to hear things are getting back on track now. good luck with it all


----------



## Strawbs78

Hey Rosypie

Yep thats me!! how are you?  DP lost her job twice due to a redundancy and then I ended up taking one so it was quite a lot of upheaval - so glad that's all behind us... 

We are back on track now and looking forward to starting in June..  Ive just joined slimming world to try and shift some weight before we start - so excited!!!

x


----------



## rosypie

redundancies are awful. they had some at DP's work then she and her whole department all went part time last feb to save their jobs. she went full time again end of summer but it's still a bit hit and miss. we used to have all these plans around saving and/or paying off our mortgage etc. now we're just mega grateful just to be keeping afloat . funny how your outlook changes.

exciting for you though, i bet you're glad to be back in position to ttc. how frustrating for fate to conspire you a delay like that. we're all well here, boys are 2 and 4 now, and i'm starting to look and doing some things for me


----------



## kateandflo

Hi People,

After 18months we've we're finaly about to start our first NHS funded cycle of IVF with ICSI in Seacroft Leeds. Can hardly wait! 

Counting down the days and eagerly started a diary at the same time as accupuncture started last month, doing anything to keep busy cos so hyped!!!

Hoping to meet others in similar stages to go through this journey for better or worse! Although the glass is still half full in this camp. 

If there's anyone out there in our neck of the woods, then we do hope they'll get in touch via this thread.

 K x


----------



## Baby Blue

Good morning  

I've recently joined Fertility Friends and just wanted to say hello and to wish you all the very best of luck.

Baby Blue


----------



## Jode

Hi everyone

I've been a member on here for a while and did post a couple of times but I'd have to say I'm more of a lurker then anything. I was planning on TTC with my gf of 7 1/2 years but unfortunately we split up after Christmas. The main reason being TTC, I've always known I was the one who was more keen and had been pushing things along, having a family and being a mum is something I've wanted for as long as I can remember. Anyway the split was ok - ish , we're still friends but just going our different ways. I can't really fall out with her for not wanting what I want because ultimately I don't want what she wants ( not having a family). So since then I've decided to continue on my own. My plan still is to egg share, I've seen the nurse, had bloods done which were fine and had counselling 2 weeks ago, I'm await the consultant appointment now on the 23rd March. I just can't wait to get going !!

All my family and friends are sooooooo supportive and right behind me. 

So hello again to everyone I have been keeping upto date but hopefully as I get going I'll post more

Jody


----------



## Damelottie

Welcome Jodylala

Feel free to join us on the single womens board too   

God luck xx


----------



## Pixie Lolly

Hi Everyone, 

My partner and I have been looking through this site for awhile and finally decided to register and post a message! 
We have been together for 6 years and had our civil partnership last year. We have been looking into IVF for a while now. Last year we went to London Womens Clinic - which we loved. We were planning on having treatment there but found out recently that we are eligable for funding on the nhs. So we are in the process of waiting to hear about the funding (and waiting list in BEDS!) for IVF.  

That's it for now.

Pixie Lolly


----------



## lucky2010

welcome pixie lolly... hope the nhs funding doesn't take too long. Good luck with the whole process.

Rach x


----------



## Benetton

Hi All

Not exactly new to this forum however I am not a regular either so thought I would drop by and officially introduce myself and what stage I we are at, hoping to get support, offer any support I can and possibly make some new R/L friends who understand what its like. 

Me 32, DP 36 (non biological) 
North London based Couple, trying for 5 years with known gay donor/Co parent
1st IVF, no children either side.
NHS funding 1 fresh, 1 frozen cycle.
Issues: PCOS, Endometriosis, Fibroids
Treatments so far: Clomid, Laproscopy, Myomectomy,3 month(HELL) of Gonapeptyl
Stage:  15/3/10 Day 3 of FSH injection.

Will have egg collection sometime next week..... " S***ing bricks"  

We feel incredibly lucky we didnt have to wait long for NHS to get the ball rolling for IVF I think we were given 8 months to wait  back in June/July.

I really hope it works first time.  


Wishing you all the best of luck and those who have already had new babies CONGRATULATIONS!!!!... Those who are pg, fingers crossed for a sticky one.

x


----------



## Kandle

Hi All,

We are a lesbian couple looking to start our family. Not sure where we start really, we have an appointment at fertility clinic next week so should be able to find out if we are eligible for treatment on the NHS, we have also been browsing the donor sites which at times feels a bit unsafe. Anyone have experience of using a known donor??

All advise and experiences welcome.

K and L


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome to JodyLaLa, Pixie Lolly, BoBina and Kandle 

Nice to have some new people on the boards 

Have PMed you about KDs *Kandle*. There is also a thread lower down on using a known donor that you might find interesting.

Good luck with EC next week *BoBina*, and with your appt on the 23rd *Jody * 

Angel


----------



## moosegirl

Hello everybody
Well I've been lurking around this forum since early 2009...just reading and finding things really helpful and supportive but not getting round to registering...anyhow here I am posting! Yeh!

Things have definitely changed for me since those early days of 2009 when I was having treatments and feeling pretty obsessed about things (y'know how it gets!)...I thought it was never gunna happen for us and we were spending such a fortune that we didn't have! Then one fateful day in October and one home insemination later...our very first...(yes really?!) and here I am 23 weeks pregnant with a little fella!!! So I guess I'm just saying to you all 'don't give up hope....it can happen!'.

Peace

Jo x


----------



## moosegirl

Me again...
mmmm just asking how come the ticker that I took ages to do (and wanted to be able to do for ages)...hasn't showed up in my post. Any ideas where I'm going wrong trying to add it to my profile?
Cheers
Jo x


----------



## M2M

Welcome moosegirl and congratulations on your ! Wonderful news. 

Try copying and pasting this code into your signature, but make sure you remove all 4 asterisks from it before saving:

[*IMG*]http://lbdf.lilypie.com/gOWC.png[*/IMG*]

Should work.  When I paste that code it shows up like this:


----------



## moosegirl

Hello M2M
You're a Star...thanks for replying so quickly (I only went for a bath and back tehe)...have done what you said so hopefully this will work now 
Can I be cheeky and ask how you upload a personal picture too? 

Wishing you good luck on your journey x


----------



## moosegirl

YEAH!!


----------



## M2M

Glad it worked for you moosegirl! 

You can upload an avatar on the same page as you change your signature. Click on "I will upload my own picture" and then use the Browse button to choose a pic from your computer, then once it's selected just click "Change Profile" at the bottom and it should upload your pic!


----------



## kateandflo

Good luck pixie,

We thought the same, that it was worth the wait to secure the first cycle via the nhs, as don't think they'll fund one if you've paid for the first yourselves.

Patience seems to be the name of the game!

lv k x


----------



## Pixie Lolly

Thanks K, 

How long did you have to wait?

Pixie lolly


----------



## babypapermache

hi everyone...i again am not exactly new i have been on and off these boards in the past mainly when i was trying to concieve for 2 years!! it took me 18 home DIY attempts and 1 failed IVF...i was sucessful with a home insemination. those 2 years were so awful....but i am so happy that it finally worked and those days are long forgotten. my baby is now 15 months old and i love been a mummy. would be nice to meet some other lesbian parents on here so thats why im posting really....want to try for number 2 soon maybe not sure lol x


----------



## kateandflo

Hi pixie,
we waited 18 months, but nearly there!  .

Would love to meet other parents or potential parents on here, but not sure where people are based?

k x


----------



## babypapermache

i'm based in derby x


----------



## rosypie

papermache, there are a few of us over on the "babies, bumps, and parenting" thread. we're in n lincs (sc unthorpe) but there are folks from all over i'd say 

i also post on _Rainbow Families_ which is a bit london-centric but there are a few groups of us dotted around the country who arrange regular (ish) meet ups. if you watch the boards you can spot them when they come up, or you could even suggest one. if your aim is to meet other lesbian parents and parents to be then if you cast your net wide you're more likely to find some like minded people (not to mention loads of support and advice).

and welcome btw


----------



## pem

welcome papemache...

we are in stoke...maybe it would be good to suggest a spring get together soon...shall i put the idea forward on the b&b thread? could be a bit more northern this time....we enjoyed the last one....will post on the b&B thread and see if there is any takers!

pem x


----------



## Benetton

Thanks Angelmine

CONGRATULATIONS Moosegirl.

My eggs are not growing as fast as they should be I have had my Gonal F upped to max dose 450 and been taking it for over a week now, hoping to have EC on monday...so tiring....  ...


----------



## starrysky

Hi **** 

Welcome!

I would just say go with your gut instincts about clinics. We recently wasted quite a bit of time staying with a clinic we had been with for ages because we didnt listen to our instinct that we should change.

It was quite hard for us to change because we were mid cycle at the time BUT if we hadnt been I think it would have been a lot easier. 

Good luck!

Starrysky


----------



## Hales :)

Hi there, 
Thought I'd better introduce myself (although I have already gone and jumped in and replied to threads).  We've been TTC for 18 months now and are going to start our second fresh IVF cycle (my other half will be having, hopefully, our first child, and I will be having the second)


----------



## welshginge

Welcome **** & Hales!

So sorry to hear about your awful experience ****, sounds dreadful. I would defo go with your gut instinct re clinics, I'm changing because a. their IVF is too pricey & b. just didn't feel human to them (get in, get out, dont ask q's etc). I initially didn't want IVF but my IUI's didn't work & it will make more financial sense to do IVF as the chances are higher.

Good luck all! xx


----------



## lmb15

welshginge - what clinic are you at? which one are you moving to?

**** - definitely go with your gut instinct and change clinics. if it's any consolation i went straight fir ivf (did egg share) as it was the most cost effective way, and more likely to work. it was nowhere near as bad or as scary as i thought - no real drug side effects and apart from being sore day of and day after egg collection, felt fine. everyone's different though. which clinic you thinking of moving to? where abouts do you live? good luck.

lisa x


----------



## Hebe

Thanks all for replying

I think I'm going to try and suss out what my gut instincts are saying!!!!  It's hard as i don't want to blow it off on one bad experience - I'm in London so the consolation is there are plenty of clinics but the reason we went with LWC is it seemed so gay friendly!! Thanks also for advice on IVF it's good to know others have kind of fast tracked too.

Good luck to you all too.


----------



## welshginge

Hey Lisa - hope you & your little man are good. I was at Leicester Fertility Centre (LRI) but I'm moving to Care Nottingham but using the clinic in Leicester (Nuffield) for some appts. LRI wouldn't let me egg share due to 1 ovary & their IVF is £5,000. Care are at least giving me the tests to see if I can egg share, if not I'll still do IVF with them.


----------



## lmb15

Welshginge - wow, i thought Leicester was cheaper than that!! I'm sure if Care won't let you egg share either, they may be other clinics that do so. Nurture in Nottingham may let you egg share? It really does keep the cost down if you can do it. Fingers crossed for you.

**** - most clinics should be gay friendly. Best thing to do is probably to go to some open days to suss them out.

Lisa x


----------



## Alicat30

Hello all, newbie just getting started though I've also posted a new topic. Looking forward to chatting with you all!

Ali


----------



## Jode

Hi 

Welshginge - I just wanted to say best of luck with all your tests, I'm currently at care Nottingham and egg sharing ( don't start till June because of holiday ) but all can say is how fab I've found them so far !  Good luck !

Jody


----------



## welshbean

Hi all

We are just starting the process for our first IVF with me donating eggs to my partner.    We have been doing IUI on and off for six years (we have two amazing children, girl is 5 and boy is 3).  

I had to loose two stone to get into a healthier BMI before they would use my eggs.  

We also run a gay parenting group based in Cheshire.  It has been going over two years we meet once a month.  It is mostly women, although we do have a few gay dads.  Message me if you want details of our next meet up.  

Look forward to getting to know you all

Welshbean


----------



## pem

hiyah..

welcome welshbean.......sounds like you have a lovely family....well done on the weight loss!

a big welcome to all new girls...


----------



## lynz26

Hello all,

I'm new here and just wanted to post to share where we are at.

We first approached our GP over Christmas and asked what our steps were to get a referral to nurture in Nottingham for DIUI / IVF. I have a lot of weight to move so started straight away and I have lost 2 1/2 stone since New Year . GP was really good about the whole thing.

I had a day 1-5 blood test which was fine however the day 21 ( taken on day 25 due to long cycles) did not indicate ovulation had occurred. The level was 20. GP thinks we mistimed the blood test and that we can take it again. I was gutted but she said that she would make the referral all the same. 

So now we are waiting for the initial appointment but we are not sure how long this will take. Does anyone know how long the referral will take and what happens after that? I am really excited but need to keep this measured as we are well aware that there are no guarantees and that money has to be a consideration.

Thank you for reading x


----------



## Me and Her

Hi Lynz,

Welcome! I'm sure you will find everyone very nice and helpful on here. I have really appreciated the support from everyone since I joined a few months ago.

I think length of referral depends on pct/clinic and whether you are private or NHS. We tried to see if we were eligible on the NHS (nobody seemed to know!) our GP referred us to the hospital quite quickly for basic tests but then we had to wait for a panel to meet and see if we were eligible (they decided we weren't) and this took ages! 

But as soon as we decided to go private (Jan '10) we rang the clinic ourselves and booked our initial appointment for about three weeks away. After that everything happened quite quickly, a few more tests (blood group and CMV status to match with a donor) and then offered a donor in March. We started our first cycle of DIUI in April. Unfortunately we didn't complete the cycle due to over stimulation but hoping to start again later this month. I guess the timetable  will be slightly different for IVF but I'm sure some of the other girls can advise you there.

Wishing you all the best for your treatment,

El.

xx


----------



## midnightaction

Hi ladies

I am gonna start posting on here again, if that's cool with everyone 

A lot of names I recognise on here from when I used to post on this thread several years ago, so hello to all you lovely ladies, and also a big hello to all the ladies I don't know. 

As you can see from my siggy it has been a long journey for me and after 6 years I am still chasing the elusive BFP. 

When I started this journey I was with my CP but unfortunately the pressures of IVF (along with a few other things) caused the relationship to breakdown and I am now going alone in the Czech Republic.

I have been posting on the single ladies thread for quite some time but for a variety if reasons I don't feel comfortable posting there any more, so I wanted to come back to this thread where I feel more comfortable. 

Am moving on to donor eggs, because after 6 IVF's I have kinda given up on my eggies ever doing their job  

I am having transfer in 1 month, and I am very excited, it feels like a whole new adventure and I sooooo hoping that DE will give me my longed for baby.

Big hugs to all  

Sarah x x


----------



## welshginge

Hi Midnightaction (love the name btw) & welcome back. Fingers crossed that donor eggs will do the trick for you & your journey kicked up a notch!! xx


----------



## M2M

Hello midnightaction and welcome back.   I really hope things go well for you this time and the donor egg is what you need to get your   !!! Sounds like you will be having your ET around the same time as me.


----------



## lmb15

Lynz26 - Hi, and welcome! We had our treatment at Nurture last summer. They're a fantastic clinic with amazing results. They were really friendly too. Not sure if you're going privately or waiting for NHS funding? We went privately, so can only advise on how things went for us....After the referral letter went off, we were seen at Nurture in about 3 weeks. We talked about our options, and we opted for IVF with anonymous donor sperm, with me doing egg share. Because i was doing egg share i had to have lots of tests done which delayed things. Once my results were all back, we were matched to both a sperm donor and egg recipient in 6 weeks. Then i started the IVF.

We were really lucky and it worked on our first go (2 embryos put back, one took, resulting in our little boy). After the initial consultation, things can move as quickly or slowly as you want (some people start on their next cycle, others want to wait a few months). Once you start the IVF it goes so quickly, and before you know it you're on the 2 week wait! The whole IVF thing was nowhere near as bad as i expected.

Hope you get your appointment through soon. Any questions about IVF/egg share/Nurture feel free to ask 

Lisa x


----------



## pem

Hey midnightaction and M2M...sounds like we will all be doing this IVF together...i hope to start downregging in about 2 weeksish....cons permitting.....lol


----------



## M2M

Exciting stuff Pem!   I start down-regulating tomorrow, all being well, so we'll be quite close together.


----------



## pem

good luck for it M2M....are you jabbing or sniffing..my DP has to do the jabs for me..we have a clinic app 2night, hoping he will let me start this cycle, day 10 today so will hopefully start DR about Day 18ish (short cycle)...so we will be a week apart.....will be nice to be following on from someone...

pem x


----------



## Benetton

Good luck too all you starting IVF and welcome back to Sarah

B x


----------



## M2M

Thanks Benett   Have you had your scan yet? How did it go?

Pem, I'm pretty sure I'll be injecting - that's what the consultant mentioned when describing what happens during a cycle - but we won't know for sure until tomorrow. DP will be doing my jabs too!


----------



## Benetton

Hey M2M

Yeah, the scan was done and it was really cool seeing the heart beating, looking forward to 12 weeks, for many reasons, most of all the constant sickness to hopefully go away.... and seeing the baby at a larger size. 

B x


----------



## Mini Us

Hi all...haven't been on for a while but thought this is the best place to drop by and say hey...

Obviously loads has been going on over the months I've been 'offline' so it'll take me a while to catch up with where everyone's at. 

I've had  a few (unsuccessful) treatments since Nov and I'm currently in a cycle now.

Mini Us


----------



## lucky2010

Hi mini us... Fingers crossed for you! X


----------



## snagglepat

Hey folks,

Mini us - good luck with this cycle. I'm sure you'll catch up soon.

It looks like we've an exciting month ahead on here with all these treatments coming up. Fingers crossed for all of you.

Sarah! Hello!!!! Welcome back! It's lovely to find you on here again. I have often wondered how things have been going for you. It's good to have an update, even though it sounds like it's been a tough few years for you. I look forward to chatting to you more. 

Benetton, don't worry too much. My sickness started to ease at about week 12/13 and was gone by about week 15/16 if memory serves. Fingers crossed you'll be an early recoverer! I think I have about two weeks to go before it starts up here so Ember and I are off to buy her several new potties today so we can attempt to get her toilet trained before it gets bad. The idea of morning sickness and pooey nappies at the same time really doesn't appeal!

Gina. x


----------



## pem

mini us - loadsa luck for this cycle...    

gina - hope the Potty training goes well, pooey nappies and ms does not sound good...euugh. We went str8 into pants and the toilet with Edie and it worked a treat....it's so much easier without nappies..loads of      for a smooth ride!


----------



## lucky2010

very jealous... Alex won't even remotely entertain the thought of loo/potty or pants (other than over his trousers!!)... think he's going to be at least three by the time he's ready!


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hello everyone  

I am completely new to this site and to the world of fertility treatment but at 31 i've decided it's now or never! I am optimistic and full of hope  

I also would also feel blessed to meet some friends along the way, I am based in Leamington Spa and am proud to be Gay but there is not much of a scene here so can get quite lonely. However I have a wonderful job and feel this is the first step of a long journey...Looking forward to chatting! 

Gem xx


----------



## snagglepat

Hi Gem,

Good to see you here.  Welcome. I'm sure you'll get answers to all your questions and plenty of support along the way here.

Good luck an best wishes,

Gina. x


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hi Gina, 

Well it was only after your lovely mail that I felt I had the courage to go through with this..  I am so happy for your 2nd Pregnancy too! You truly deserve it. Glad to be part of this community  

Gem x


----------



## Damelottie

Glitterintheair

Myself and some of the other single women on here met at a great play centre in Leamington last week, You'll be able to come along with your LO in the near future then   

LL x


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hi LL,

Ah now that makes me feel positive... I will one day have a little one of my own!... I'd love to meet up with you all and meet other mummies! I'm pretty much based in leamington  

Gem xx


----------



## LouisandPhoebe

Hello everyone,
We used to post here a couple of years ago but with work and kids the only thing the computed does is play CBeebies.  I cant believe how many lovely babies have been born over the last couple of years - congratulations everyone.  We are just about to start again TTC after lots of thought on the best way to do it and saving up the pennies.

Would be great to chat to you all 

Love
Charley and Lee


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome Charley and Lee   

Angel


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hi Charly and Lee, 

Good to meet you  

Gem x


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Gem, 
We're at CRM in Coventry too  Have you been yet? 
Hales


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hiya, 

I went today for the first time!   I had my referral letter with me and went to see that I had been referred to the right place haha. Just waiting for my appointment now - scared! 

How have you got on with them? Are you local? I have just moved to Coventry, only from Warwick but I love it   I really have all my fingers crossed that I will get somewhere with them and if nothing else then my positivity may win them over (though that may be a front on the day!). 

Keep in touch, 

Gem x


----------



## Hales :)

We're over in Solihull, but dp works in Coventry.  I do like it at CRM, we have Dr Keay who is lovely, and some of the nurses do seem a little bit abrupt but most of them are lovely really, honest! We have a few favourites.  Hoping that this time we'll be a positive stat for the clinic!  
Are you having IVF?


----------



## floralou

Hello  

Just wanted to come and say hi and give a brief introduction...

I'm 26, my girlfriend is 24 and we have been together 4.5 years. We bought our own house 2 years ago and have 3 lovely little dogs.

I have been broody for as long as I can remember, but it's taken some time to talk my OH round. 

One of our friends is going to be a known donor for us, he will be known to the child as an uncle and will play as much of a role in the childs life as an uncle would.

Problem is, I'm not ovulating. When I first went to my GP a few months back, she suspected PCOS (which I have suspected for some time!) and I had day 2, and 21 bloods along with an internal scan. The scan revealed nothing except a slightly enlarged right ovary, but the bloods weren't normal. I then had another progesterone test on day 35 as AF still hadn't arrived. 

Originally my GP said that there was nothing the she or the NHS could do to help us, as we originally thought we'd buy sperm from a private clinic. Since then though we've arranged for our friend to do it, and my GP referred me to the hospital infertility clinic.

We had an appointment at the end of June, but cancelled it due to my OH getting cold feet/wanting to sort her life out first (she's in a job she doesn't enjoy and it doesn't really pay enough) - our new appoinemtnt is at the end of August. 

Our donor has not had any tests or anything, and I'm wondering whether he would need to? My OH will be coming to the appointment with me, but not our donor. He doesn't live overly close (about 30 minutes away).

I'm just finding this whole process overwhelming and confusing - it's so hard to have to fight so much for something most couples take for granted. 

So erm yeah...that was my brief hello and introduction...sorry for rambling


----------



## welshginge

Welcome Laura. Feel free to join in to the other discussions!!! Don't worry about the rant, ttc is such a hard thing to do for anyone and between we know how you are feeling. 

I can't answer your specific q's about your donor as we are doing clinic and anon donor route. Just want to say good luck!! x


----------



## Me and Her

Hi and welcome Laura,

again we are using an anonymous donor so I can't answer your question but just wanted to say hi    and best of luck with your treatment.

El.  xx


----------



## dollface86

hello my and my trans husband are just staring the process of trying for a baby, we live in gloucestershire so think we will use the London women's clinic in cardiff, 
i don't yet understand all the abbreviations you guys use so am a little confused, so if anyone could help me out understanding them i would be thankfull.

cheers and hello again dollface86


----------



## Me and Her

Welcome dollface. You should find lots of support on here, I certainly have. Try this link for the abbreviations - they are a bit confusing!

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/index.php?option=com_glossary&Itemid=120

El. xx


----------



## southern_angel

Welcome Dollface   

As Me and her says, these boards are really friendly - just dive in and start chatting! 

Angel


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Dollface - These boards are a great source of support and information - if you're not sure of something, just ask, someone will answer - I didn't know what PUPO meant for donkeys until I asked (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise)


----------



## dollface86

thankyou everbody, for being so friendly, you guys are so welcoming,   
dollface x


----------



## Munkle

Hello All,

I'm pretty nervous - just started first FET cycle (sniffing Buserelin) at the CRGH (formerly ACU).  My partner gave birth to our DS 1YO and now I'm hoping to be able to give birth to one of her blastocysts.  Hers was a long journey for various reasons - we started with the ludicrously incompetent LWC and moved to the CRGH/ACU.  Took about 4 years in total, ending with a very trauamtic birth and post partum period but we are SO happy and can't wait to have another.  

Really difficult to decide whether to put one embryo back or two.  I am 32 but the blastocysts were fertilised when my partner was 38 and it's her age that counts.  With DS we put two back.  But I don't think i could face another traumatic birth, which would be so much more likely with twins. 

ARGH!  Thanks for listening.

Like everyone here I just want it to work, can't face another 4 year journey (and would love to have three kids!) and don't fancy spending another £20k.  At work and finding it impossible to think of anything else but this and how much we want DS to have a sib.l

Almost forgot to say HELLO EVERYONE!

Munkle xx


----------



## lmb15

Welcome Munkle!!

Sorry to hear about the problems you had with your partner conceiving and delivering with your little boy - this whole pregnancy lark isn't as smooth running as everyone makes out!! 
Fingers crossed for a better time for you with this cycle   
When do you have to decide how many to put back? 
Best of luck.
Lisa x


----------



## Steph29

Hi Munkle and welcome

We had that dilema too of deciding weather to put 1 or 2 blasts back as we didnt want twins for our first anyway we decided on 1.When are you hoping to do this?


----------



## Pinkcat1992

Hello everyone,

It was such a relief to find FF and to know that we are not alone in our journey. I'm 37 and my girlfriend Gem is 27. We have just come through our first cycle of natural IUI with donor sperm. I am the recipient. The TWW felt like a two year wait and ended with a bfn and a very heavy AF. So now we are on day 3 of a new cycle, first follicle scan booked for next week and we are focusing on positive thoughts and follicle growing type foods!!  

It has been so good to read other peoples stories and to know that our trials and tribulations can be shared with others. 
Any tips on how to remain stress free during the process or I am i deluding myself that being stress free is an option? 

Well, that's all for now. Glad I finally plucked up the courage to make a post.

Sarah and Gem


----------



## Me and Her

Welcome Munkle - I hope your journey for a second child is quicker and easier than last time.   

Welcome Sarah and Gem -we too have just had a BFN on our first natural IUI cycle, although no AF yet so not started next cycle. I had my inlaws staying for the second week of the 2ww which stopped me getting too stressed about the outcome as I was too busy stressing about them and keeping the house clean and tidy!    Best wishes for your second cycle. 

El.  xx


----------



## Steph29

Hello and welcome Sarah & Gem

You should find most things you need to know on here and lots of advice.

Good luck with the scan next week keep us all posted.


----------



## Munkle

Hello Me & Her, Steph29 and Imb15 - and everyone else    Thanks so much for your support.

I think we have until the morning of the embryo transfer to decide.  We'll probably have two transfered, but the thought of twins is so very scary.  When DS1 was conceived (after we transfered two) we couldn't have imaged how difficult raising a newborn can be so the thought of twins just seemed like a bonus to us (the more the merrier, two for the price of one etc.).  But now that we know how much work it is, and how the tiredness (like torture) can drive you crazy, it's not so abstract.  Sound familiar to anyone?  Sometimes the road to conception takes long that you don't even get time to really imagine what might be at the end of it.

However, now that I've started the cycle, taking the medication, and thinking about all the injections I have to look forward to (not to mention the bill), I think we're going to go for two.  And after all this wrangling over the decision, none might implant...

Hope everyone's feeling strong and hopeful.  To all those who haven't yet had a child I just want to tell you that no matter how long it takes it's worth it - never lose sight of the joy that will one day be yours and don't let anyone or anything discourage you.

Love Munkle


----------



## Pinkcat1992

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all your welcome messages!

We had our first scan of the new cycle today. 6 follies in total, 2 on the left, 4 on the right, but all still very small. Last month on the same day I had only one or two follicles but twice the size. Not sure if this is good or bad. Any ideas? Hoping that there will be some major growth over the next week or so. I read somewhere that if the cycle goes past 20 days before ovulation the lining starts to deteriorate so no good for iui. Is this the case? I'm worried that I'm about to have one of my very long cycles (back in feb I had a 42 day one!!)
Advice or thoughts anyone?

S


----------



## b&amp;l

*waves* to dollface, we are a bio female (lea) and b is f2m (trans) please feel frEe to pm us to chat - good luck with your journey

Were in leeds x


----------



## mrssharkey

We (Erin & Rachel) got married in July 2009 and have our 1st appointment with the fertility clinic on 8th September. We are going for an unknown donor and I (Erin) will hopefully be sprogged up at some point in the not too distant future!  We've been reading book fter book after book after leaflet after web posting so probably have no idea what to actually expect


----------



## Mary13

We read lots of books too and got quite confused by it. At our first appt we were told about options open to us, funding not open to us and blood tests needed. We tried the known donor route and now embarking on unknown via a clinic which clinic to get the sperm from to transport to the clinic near here is one of great discussion currently with different costs, availability and information!
Good luck on the 8th


----------



## Me and Her

Hi Erin and Rachel -Welcome. We too got married in July 2009!    I hope your appointment goes well.

Hi Mary 13 - it is all very confusing   . I hope you get sorted soon.  

El.  xx


----------



## kelen

Hi all,

after trawling through as many sites and articles on the net that i can find, i stumbled across fertility friends & after seeing so many nice posts, and reading peoples stories, i thought i'd give it a go. Trying to learn the terms and abbreviations as quickly as possible, (there are so many though)! I am part of a female couple (29 & 30), married in december 09, looking to start a family in the near future. We know we want to use my wifes egg, put into me, with donor sperm. Is this possible? Is it the most expensive way? No idea where to get the ball rolling, do we have to go through our GP initially even though theres no chance of funding (the media seems to make it sound like there is a chance of IVF on the NHS)! Any recommended clinics in the north-west? As you can see, so many questions. So hopefully a few of you lovely people on here can help us out.

Thanks, hope to hear from you soon.x


----------



## Strawbs78

Hi Kelen

Welcome!  Definitely possible but with a private clinic so it will be £££££...  Best place to start would be to go to gp to discuss NHS route adn book in for an info day at  your local private clinic and ask them (it should be free to attend these).. Good luck!! xx


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Kelen, 
It seems to vary from PCT (Primary Care Trust) to PCT.  We aren't entitled to any funding at all, but know of other couples that have been entitled to 1 go of IVF.  Best to go and see the GP just to find out where you stand - no point spending money if you don't have to!


----------



## Strawbs78

Just wanted to come back on and say if you egg share privately the cost wont be terrible prohibitive if you do the egg share thing amongst yourselves also.. xx


----------



## kelen

hi guys, just a little thanks for the info, the ball is rolling, our first appointment booked with the GP. I know its a long journey ahead but its nice to know so many people on here have had success, and can offer advice & guidance. Hope all is going well for you x


----------



## Steph29

Hi Kelen

We had the same teatment you discribe I carried my partners eggs we used private clinic so it is quite pricy as we had to pay for 2 of everything but all clinics are different. There is also egg sharing with others as well as your DW if this is possible you can get one treatment free therefore paying for 1 not 2 but like i said all clinics are different.

Ema


----------



## kedmo1

Hello  

I'm new to all this, I'm Kerry and am about to start my first attempt ever at baby making. In F/F relationship with Wendy and we're getting hitched at end of September. 
Had all my tests done and am finally about to start IUI with Donor from LWC. Starting with a natural cycle and hopefully have this around start sept.
Any advice appreciated for the start of my journey ?


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hi Kerry

Welcome to FF   My only advice would be... Be Patient, take it easy and stay calm and listen to your body. I truly hope this happens for you quickly.

Gem xx


----------



## Me and Her

and Welcome Kelen and Kedmo!

El. xx


----------



## Munkle

Hi Kelen,
Hope all's going well with you and that you managed to get some answers already.  I'm hoping to have two of my partner's embryos transferred to me on Wednesday - so I wanted to share my experience with you.
We have done everything privately from the beginning.  We already have one son who is coming up to 14 months (whom my partner carried) and are lucky enough to have around 10 embryos left over for me to try.  It is more expensive to do it this way because obviously you have to pay for one cycle in which eggs are extracted and fertilised from your partner and then a separate Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET) cycle for you.
We are the first lesbian couple at our clinic to do this (the excellent CRGH / ACU if you're interested) and it did confuse them a bit, particularly as my partner already had a history with them of getting pregnant in a fresh cycle.  It's been frustrating at times but ultimately it looks like it will be fine - so long as it works.  The annoying thing is that in order to do this your partner needs to register legally with the HFEA as a donor but the forms and process just aren't appropriate for lesbian couples.  I'm going to raise this with the HFEA as they really need to change it.  Anyway, this is just a minor thing.  The other thing to consider is that FET from donor eggs is less likely to work than either fresh ET or FET from your own eggs.  So theoretically it could take more tries before you get a success.  
In total we have already spent £20,000 on building our family and while it's obviously worth it I really hope this cycle (my first) works as we could do with a few years off the fertility treadmill!

The one thing I'm really glad is that we transferred out of the London Women's Clinic a long time ago - there's no reason why lesbian and single women should feel they have to go somewhere that targets them with advertising.  We all have equal access to services now and can choose the best, not just the one that promises not to treat us differently.  My advice (for what's worth) is that lesbians are just as deserving as anyone else - we should demand the best medical care in fertility and not be distracted by clinics who target our pink pound!

Good luck one and all,

Munkle xxx


----------



## Munkle

p.s. wanted to say that when you're choosing a clinic in your area (sorry I don't know any in the North West), just go to the HFEA website and look at their results. *BUT*: You need to do a degree of additional research which involves looking into the typical profile of patients that the clinic treats. e.g. somewhere that treats extremely complex cases would have a lower success rate but may be a much better clinic medically. And somewhere that specializes in single women/lesbians (like the London Womens Clinic) might have a relatively good success rate but much of this is accounted for by the fact that most of their clients are perfectly fertile women who simply lack sperm!

Fertility treatment can be tough and expensive so you really have to do your research - don't be wooed by glossy brochures or advertising that targets lesbians!


----------



## lynz26

Hello All,

i have not posted for some time but thought i would just up date where we are at. Following our NHS referral in May we had our appointment at Nottingham QMC fertility with Mr Hopkisson on the 26/07. He was brilliant... unfortunately despite all of my efforts, I had failed to lose enough weight and expected the worst. The outcome was still positive and we were told that as soon as my BMI is at the correct level that we can continue and book the HSG. This left me with a minimum of 11lbs to lose and I am due to be weighed again tomorrow.

We are Excited and nervous and hoping for good news. I think that I may have lost 8 or 9lbs but who knows what may happen over-night... lol  . DP is very confident. Can't wait to start treatment with DIUI. Any advice / support will be gratefully received x 

Lyndsay


----------



## kelen

Hi all, went to the GP, he didnt have a clue what to do but promised he would look into it and get us some info for a referral to a clinic. So at least that first step has been made. Thanks munkle for all your advice, hope your next round of ET is successful. You have given us so much to think about and we are researching heavily into clinics in our area. Just got to wait to see what info comes back from the GP. Thanks again one and all for the support and advice, very much appreciated.x x


----------



## welshbean

Hi Kelen

I can wholeheartedly recommend Manchester Fertility Services - they have been amazing since the day we first saw them over seven years ago.

I also know of people who have had terrible experiences at the Liverpool Womens Clinic - PM me if you need want to have a chat about your options

Welshbean


----------



## kedmo1

GP's and lesbians - they just don't seem to mix !!!  

when i first went to my GP in May to see if I could get all the screening blood tests done on NHS rather than paying the clinic test fees and thought i also should advise them I was in the process of attempting TTC - she agreed to tests but then asked what the overall cost was of treatment and what I hoped to do ivf/iui etc. Told her IUI with anom donor and gave her rough costs for procedure and sperm !!

The stupid doctor just said well you could do it yourself at home it would be much cheaper !!! Arhhhhhhhhhh. Think she wanted me to grab a random man and inseminate myself.    she was more interested in finding out if the clinic would check with them whether i had any mental health history. (i don't- so not sure why she was interested !!)  Crazy GP's. I have not been back since.


----------



## The_Scenic_Route

Hello,
Im new here, although my Journey started what seems like an eternity ago! 

We are two women in a same sex relationship of 7 years. Im 32 and have a strong maternal instinct and I have always known I would like a family. I have no known fertility problems but I am not so cocky about that because only time will really tell (I have never tried to concieve before). When I was younger I had always assumed that I would marry a guy, have two children, a cat a dog and a Land Rover! It was only when I stumbled across the realisation that I prefer women and became involved in a serious same sex relationship that it suddenly dawned upon me that having a baby might not happen. I can honestly say that I grieved for the children that I would not have, the people around me were not particularly supportive (back then) and I really did hit a very low point. I then convinced myself that it was fine, I got a dog instead! 5 years on and with the biological clock ticking I decided to take control of my own future and put everything in place to start this journey.

At first I brought my partner along this road kicking and screaming all the way, but now Ive worked my magic and we are both united and excited about the future.

It started with a New Years Resolution to loose weight to get to my ideal BMI, which I managed by May (2 stone later), then I switched my diet to 'The Fertility Diet', Im exercising daily (which the dog is very pleased about), I am alcohol and caffine free, rattling with pregnacare and generally itching to get started!!!! This has been a long, long process and its not even started!

Bearing in mind that I have experienced a 'sence' of infertility (5 years ago) even if I wasnt physiologically infertile, I can truely sympathise with anybody facing that as a reality, and because of this I have decided to be an egg donor to another woman. This was a bit of a battle in itself as the clinic wanted me to do IUI and really didnt want to put me through IVF unless it was proven necessary to do so, but I really was quite sure I wanted to egg share. So here I am. AMH- Satisfactory, all other tests passed. I even have an egg recipient lined up!

There is a tiny chance that I could start my first cycle on the 28th of this month - they are currently working out if my receipient could be down regulated in time, but I have been warned that is more likely to be 3 weeks after my next period. Im just hoping itll fly by now.

Its all very exciting

Hope to chat to you all soon, are there any of you out there who live in the Manchester /Cheshire or Chester area? We are in Cheshire but have links in both cities and It'd be good to know a few other people in the same boat as us.
TSR


----------



## Skybreeze

Welcome to the boards The_Scenic_Route!!

I wish you all the luck in the world in you egg share cycle!! I have shared 3 times and its great to be able to help someone else. 
There is lots of boards on FF so have a browse around and post where you wish!

Good luck hun
Natalie xxx


----------



## lmb15

*TSR* - hello and welcome!! I did egg share too. It's a great way to have treatment yourself, help someone else, and save a bit of money  .
I really hope you get to start soon. Once you get going time just flies by. Well done on the weight loss and getting healthy. You stand a great chance of it working. 
We're from Leicester, but i've got a feeling there's a couple of people from up near you. I'm sure they'll be along soon.
Best of luck with it all.

Lisa x


----------



## Strawbs78

Welcome and well done on the weight loss.. It is such an exciting time and I wish you all the luck in the world and for it to happen quickly for you..;

we are all here if you need to vent or share good news.

J


----------



## bluepumpkin

Hello! I am also new on here, and like you The_Scenic_Route, am 32 and have been with my partner for seven years, and have had to spend a lot of time persuading her to have a child! Finally she has come around to the idea and we have started looking into egg-sharing. We haven't ever tried IUI or anything, but somehow the egg-sharing feels right to me although obviously it is a lot more invasive. 

My GP was really helpful actually, she had to send me away and bring me back in once she had looked in to the provision of fertility treatment for same-sex couples as she didn't know what the rules were. Sadly there is no provision from my PCT, but she has sent me for a whole load of tests that the clinic requires so that I don't have to pay for them.

I'm currently waiting for the results to come back regarding hormone levels and viral tests before I know whether or not I can be considered for egg-sharing. Does anybody know whether having a parent with rhematoid arthritis will make me ineligible for egg-sharing? I know it can be hereditary sometimes although it doesn't appear to be in my family. 

Anyway! I am at the very start of my journey, so it is really exciting to be able to look at everyone else on here who is so much more experienced in it all. I'm sure that I will be here more in the future asking lots more questions!


----------



## Charlie &#039;N&#039; Bec

Hey all 
Just reading your threads, 'Scenic-Route, i noticed you said you are on 'The Fertility Diet? please explain what this is as reading through diets and just need one to stick to. 

Thank you in advance ladies 

Becki and Charlie xx


----------



## Zuzana

Hello everyone! I guess I am new here, as well Me and my partner would love to try for a baby hopefully next year. We have to get married first, though, as we would like to have both our names on the birth certificate  I am so glad I found this forum! Can't wait to read through everything and hopefully post soon! Just don't want to post questions, that have already been answered (or can I? )
Looking forward to talking to you all!
xxx
Zuzana


----------



## Skybreeze

Hi Zuzana

Welcome to the board!! Its lovely to have you here.
I am so glad you have found us, please feel free to look around the whole of FF.. Also feel free to post questions for us to answer if you cant find what your looking for. 
Good luck with getting married and of course trying for your wonderful little one!!

Natalie xxxxx


----------



## Kezza78

Hi everyone, 

I'm new here and have been lurking for a few days trying to read up on everything! 

Just a bit about me, Myself  and DP have been together 9 years and have been ttc for the past 20 months using at home AI with KD. We decided to change KD in August as our previous one keep letting us down. It's been a very emotional ride and we have finally decided that if I haven't caught be Xmas Dp is going to take over while I get myself checked out properly and then hopefully I'll carry No2! Really hoping it doesn't come to that. 

I've been reading through previous post and it seems like a really supportive group, congratulations on all the BFP's and babies that have arrived. FX'd it'll be our turn soon.


----------



## katenreb

Hi we're new on here I am Kate and my DP is Rebbecca. we haven't started on the road yet and not sure where to start. I have 4 children from my past that live with us but we would so love to add to our family. we both work in child care so used to having lots of kids around I am just very scared about the cost side. we are min wage! are we mad to think we can do this and have a baby of our own?
I have also thought about egg donation / and surrogacy but thats another story


----------



## babypapermache

Hello everyone, im charli! its so nice to see so many lesbian parents xx I was with my DP for 5 years she has a 6yr old girl and i have a 21 month old boy it took me 2 years to get preg with a mix of various DIY home insemms and IVF. The DIY insem on the 19th go worked!! we have since split up and i am now pregnant with no 2 with a known donor. didnt expect to be single and preg with a toddler but its all new and im just going with the flow right now xx


----------



## babypapermache

any other single lesbian mums on here btw?? xx


----------



## welshginge

Hello & welcome Katenreb, babypapermache & kezza! Get your butts across to general chat thread so we can all chat to you! There are other single mums on here too so your defo not alone!


----------



## Strawbs78

Just wanted to pop on and say a big hello and welcome to all the newbies.  I mainly am in the 2WW thread so not in here often pbut feel free to pop in to that thread and see what's doing.. x


----------



## Hales :)

Hi all the newbies- definitely go over the lgb general chit chat board, we're friendly, honest!


----------



## The_Scenic_Route

Hello, thanks for all your messages. I had not checked this thread because my treatment was delayed, but I now have my finalised dates and its just 10 days away until I down regulate now. SO EXCITED!!!!

Bluepumpkin - 
Hello! I have not heard about Rheumatoid being a disqualifying factor. Cystic Fibrosis and Chromasomal defects definately are. I think you will be alright in that respect. Fingers crossed for you.

Charlie N Bec - 
Sorry I didnt reply earlier. I lost my weight using Rosemary Conleys diet. This one always works for me because I have (I can now boast 'had') such a sweet tooth. You can have loads of sugary stuff on her diet which helped me transist from my unhealthy diet to a new healhier life style. You do have to cut out fat with her diet which meant no chocolate!  but I am a bit addicted to that stuff and if I want to loose weight I have to go completely cold turkey with it so I managed anyway.
The fertility diet is one of a few books I found on Amazon, it seemed like the most robust and evidence based fertility centred diet available so I bought it. I only switched to this one when I had lost my excess weight because it suggests you eat things rich in olive oil, full fat dairy products and lots of nuts and seeds which is the complete opposite to Rosemary Conleys diet.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fertility-Diet-Groundbreaking-Research-Ovulation/dp/0071494790/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1287341693&sr=8-2









Zuzana -
Dont wait a moment longer! The clinics dont seem to have ANY rush about them! Its taken me ages to get through all the red tape. Make contact with your chosen clinic now, if they are quicker with their treatments you can simpy delay your treatment. Both myself and my un-married partner will both be listed on the birth certificate. Its a special form that they get you to sign, you can only do it through a clinicso if you did your own home IUI it would not be available to you. So dont wait, there is no need to!

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


----------



## Tantrumfly

Hi folks

I introduced on the main intro page the links is here. http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=249200.0

We could use as much encouragement as possible.

To make a long story short, we're lesbian, married, in our 40's living in Glasgow and we're having private treatment, using IUI.


----------



## southern_angel

Warm welcomes to all the newbies, lovely to have you on board   

Angel


----------



## charlruk

Hi, 

Been to LWC today, we are starting IVF in about 3 weeks (partner,not me),!! V exciting! need to get drugs in preparation, any suggestions of best place to go have heard rumours ASDA is cheap?

x


----------



## HAPPY AND HOPEFUL

Hi Guys.

Think its about time we introduce ourselves...have been lurking for a couple of months!   We are a female/female couple (28/30) and are about
to start IUI at LWC and are both hoping to carry a child. DP is going first as she is slightly older....she has just had a hysteroscopy to remove two 
endometrial polyps and today we have been matched so are all set to go in the next 2 weeks!!  We haven't decided on our donor as yet...may post 
about our decision in a seperate thread!! Anyway just thought we'd say hi and thankyou so far for all the info we have gained from you knowledgeble
ladies.


----------



## Pinktink

There is an on line pharmacy called central homecare that is much cheaper than asda or anywhere else for drugs...

welcome to all you guys....

we started at the LWC too.

Good luck xx


----------



## nickidee

Asda say they offer drugs at cost, but some drugs suppliers/pharmacists have been able to negotiate better 'cost' prices than others (added to that, the price you are quoted may depend on which clinic you are with) - for example, Central Homecare offer a reduced rate for Menopur to patients at the Lister clinic (approx £4 cheaper per amp than Asda's cost price which mounts up when your script is for 50 amps!).

There is a thread on this site:
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=9821.0
which details different pharmacists/drug companies, and it is worth ringing round as many as possible to see who offers you the lowest quote - the savings can be huge!

Good luck!


----------



## rubypop2

Hello just thought I'd pop up a wee post to introduce myself (my lovely lady  is out at the cinema and I am in recovering from a day with my grandmother!!), I've been 'hanging around' this site for about a year now and have been witness to many of the joys and indeed heartbreaks, but haven't been brave enough to post!  But we've been for all our tests at the LWC Darlington and are set to start on our first cyle of IVF in February 2011  Obviously we're both very excited but trying to be practical and sensible at the same time ... easier said than done isn't it!  
I do have a few questions that I wanted to pop out ... I was wondering if there is any one else up in the Highland area (Scotland), just because we're travelling such a long way we are opting to have our scans to check follicles ( is that right?) closer to home, the LWC doctor suggested Nine Wlls in Dundee but seemed uncertain of anywhere else and I just wondered if anyone else had any ideas?  Oh and what was ( sorry I forgot who posted the message) talking about when they mentioned buying drugs from ASDA...is that drugs as in the drugs package from LWC, can you opt to try and source it yourself?  
Any answers will be gratefully received. x


----------



## Pinktink

Hello   

Welcome to the boards.

When we did our treatment we found central homecare to be the cheapest by far - (asda were second cheapest) and they delivered really quickly and provided all the needles, syringes, sharps bins etc.

We started our treatment at the LWC (london) and they were happy to let us buy drugs from elsewhere - you'd be mad to pay clinic prices   

Good luck for your treatment. Hope it is a short and successful journey for you! 

xx


----------



## Philly-Cee

Hi everyone! 

My wife and i are new to all of this and i hope i've posted this in the right bit. We have no idea how to use this! 

Right, well, my wife and i have decided now is the right time for us to finally start a family.

First, we went down the adoption route, but due to personal circumstances, we faced far too many obsticles.

We have looked into finding a sperm donor on certain websites, but they all seem to be BIG cons!

We were then going to try a find someone we knew to donate to us but again, we seem to be facing difficulties. 
*Question:* If we used a sperm donor we know, what are the legal rights for my partner and i and the sperm donor? 

This is what we want, sperm, but no contact or anything from the donor. If we used a donor we knew, we wouldn't want them to have any parental rights. But when our child is 18, we are more than willing to let them contact their biological father.

Using a sperm donor we know all seems a little conmplicated, but if someone can answer the questions above, maybe it would be the route we choose.

We are now looking to use a Private Fertility Clinic for treatment. As we live in Manchester, we have been in contact with Manchester Fertility Services. They seen really good and were very helpful and as the clinic is in Manchester, it is better for us.
*Question:* Has anyone used this clinic before? If so, what are you're thoughts?

We have also been in contact with Londons Womens Clinic.
*Question:* Has anyone used this clinic before? If so, what are you're thoughts?

We really want to get the ball rolling, but as we don't know anyone who has been through this, it would be really helpful for some advice really.

We look forward to hearing from you.
Thanks very much.

Ria and Lou xxx


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Ria & Lou, and welcome! We used a private clinic and imported sperm from a bank in America (Xytex), they will only import to a licensed clinic.  I know that lots of couples on here also have experience of a known donor, but we decided not to go down this route as thought it would be too complicated for us.

The reason why we imported mainly was that the waiting list for donor sperm here was too long at our clinic (we were told a year)

Hope this helps!


----------



## Pinktink

Hello   

We also used anonymous donor sperm but we used it from our clinic as they had no waiting list... 

The complications of known donor sperm were too intricate for us.... we are happy to support our future children in locating their donor if they feel the need when they are adults but wouldn't want anyone else to have any role in our childrens upbringing but us.

We used the LWC for two cycles and it was not a positive experience - that being said there are many people on here who have had babies through them and would be complimentary. My main advice would be to go to these clinics, talk to their staff and go with who you feel comfortable.

Good luck x


----------



## Philly-Cee

Hi Hales and Pinktink,

thank you both for your replies. I don't think that using a known sperm donor is the best option, but we dont want to rule anything out just yet. If we use a clinic, which we're pretty sure we're going to do, it will probably be MFS as we live nearby and after conversations with staff there, we have found them more than helpful.

Thank you both again and we will keep you updated  

Ria and Lou xx


----------



## charlruk

Pinktink, and nikkidee!
Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou for your advice! We had got quotes for our drugs from numerous places.... Clinic wanted £1200. Boots £1300, ASDA £1040........ and the best bit Central homecare..... £850! What a massive difference! Thankyou for saving us £200!

Due to start  next week, very exciting! 

Char and Chelle.


----------



## gingermags

Hi everyone,

This is my first post although I have been looking at the message board for a while now. My DP and I have started on IUI at the LWC and are currently on the 2WW. How do people cope? I'm going a little crazy   particularly because I've been told not to exercise (except for walking) so i don't know what to do with myself!
Also, we would like to be able to meet anyone in our area, are there any groups? We are based in Welwyn Garden City.

M & L


----------



## charlruk

My DP  had ET on Sat at LWC! also on the long 2ww! we know how you feel! we have both gone back to work today, which has helped take our mind of it! She is a devoted Gym junky normally, and I am sure will also find it hard not to excersise!! Got everything crossed!

C & C


----------



## kezandaimee

Hi everyone, ive also been 'lurking' for a while without posting so thought id say hi.

my partner and i are currently going through ivf...(im the one trying this time) am currently on day 12 of gonal f and going back tomorrow for another scan where i hope to get a day for egg collection (possibly friday).

We are using Anon donor sperm and i am donating my eggs aswell. Its such a daunting experience isnt? you think you read up on it and your prepared but only when your going through do you really understand how tough it is, and this is only our first attempt so we know we will probably need lots more attempts to have the big family we both want!

Anyway hope to get to know you all and wish you all lots of luck in your journeys


----------



## Pinktink

Hello   

M&L - good luck for you 2ww madness ... it was definitely the worst part of our treatment,  we started off at the LWC too. We our based in WGC as well... we both work at the QEII   

KezandAimee - good luck for your cycle - my dp donated her eggs on our second cycle. we always planned to have about 4 children but to be honest I think 2 is more realistic for us - we found treatment so hard emotionally that if we were lucky enough to get another baby after this one (hopefully carried by me) I think we would call it a day but hey - never say never!  

look forward to speaking to you xx


----------



## gingermags

Hi!

Good luck everyone. It feels so good to have joined and be able to share and get to know other people who are going through the same things.

Pinktink - we would love to meet you sometime. We only moved to WGC just over a year ago and wanted to know we aren't the only pink family in the area!


----------



## Pinktink

GM - have sent you a message


----------



## kezandaimee

I can imagine you guys are going crazy on your 2week wait the whole process is crazy enough without having to wait and not be in control of it! 

Pinktink am totally with you on reducing the size of the family dream to one or two this whole process is so difficult, got egg collection tomorrow so at least we have finally reached this point!


----------



## Pinktink

hi kezandaimee

how did the EC go..

hope you are ok - come over to the chat thread xx


----------



## BabyShine

Testing..Testing...123

Hi all, new member as of *looks at watch* 10 minutes or so...brilliant website and great resource for me and my partner...having trouble understanding all the abbrreviations, im sure i will work them all out soon  

Me and my partner have been together 3 years, Civil Partners as of Octover this year will be having IUI with a known donor from next week...all very exciting


----------



## b&amp;l

Welcome x


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Babyshine - all of the abbreviations are quite confusing, but if you're not sure just ask, people are friendly and will tell you! 
Good luck with tx (treatment  )


----------



## Mogget

Hi,

Um, new here,  (well, 1st post, you can probably figure that out), new to this whole thing.  And incredibly confused by everything!

So... just wanted to say hey.

Mogget x


----------



## Elven

Hi everyone, very new to all this - hope we're in the right place for some help and advice.

Really glad to have found this forum as you always feel like you are the only ones going through something like this!  Having decided we both definitely want to start a family, with hindsight that was the easy bit.  Still undecided about the donor status and confused about everything.

Based in Northampton, does anyone have any experience of clinics in the Midlands?

Any advice on where we go now would be greatly appreciated, really hope to hear from you ...........  

Thanks


----------



## Hales :)

Hi Elven - We are in the Midlands and have used Coventry CRM (@ UHCW) - We've had mixed opinions about them, but they have, ultimately gotten us to where we want to be! And welcome!


----------



## welshginge

Hi Elven. I'm in Leics & used Care Notts for my IVF (they also have a clinic in N'hampton) & we were very happy with their treatment. My IUI's were somewhere else & I would not recommend them!


----------



## Elven

Hi hales8181 & welshginge!

Thanks for your responses.

One question hopefully you can answer, should we just self refer to a clinic or go via a GP referral.  We have just moved and not even met the doc yet so a little nervous!  

Thanks in advance....


----------



## Hales :)

We had to get a referral from the GP for CRM - In fact, I've got my referral appointment next Tuesday to be referred - Scary stuff!


----------



## welshginge

I self referred to Care. Just rang & made an appt!


----------



## cazinge

We are in Worcestershire and only moved here a few months ago so were in a similar situation to you regarding the docs - not sure DW has even registered yet! (she is never ill tho!).

We are using MFS in Walsall, I just emailed and they rang me the next day for an apt!
It does say on their website self-refering paitents need a letter from dr before they start treatment but I think that is more for straight couples because of trying to discover why they can't conceive, etc. The nurse didn't ask us for one at our 1st apt but we signed to say they can contact the docs so I gues they can write if they want our medical history, etc.

Hope this helps,

Caz xx

PS My tip would be pick a clinic that is quite easy to get to because having only had 1 apt so far I am already stressing about getting time off work for apts and it is only 30-40mins away, I can't imagine having to travel for much longer!


----------



## BecsW

Hi Everyone,
I suppose I am a returnee rather than a newbie but have not been on for so long that I thought I should say hello again as it has been so long I doubt anyone remembers me!
My DP and I are extremely lucky as on our 4th IUI we had a sticky BFP and our son was born last April   Elven we went to Midland Fertility Services and they were just brillliant-would def recommend them  

We are planning to start again soon to try for a second-prob in the summer. Feels so diff trying for a second.

Big hellos to all, lookforward to chatting,
Becs xxx


----------



## BeckyB2011

Hi, I'm new on here. As with most newbies I'm confused about all the abbreviations.  But I'm sure I'll figure them out eventually.  My partner and i had a civil partnership last APril and we have planning to start a family for ages and finally went for 1st IUI using anonymous donor a few days ago.  This 2ww is a nightmare.  I feel like a kid waiting for Christmas, so I'm pleased I came across this forum and found lots of people in similar circumstances to share with.    Anyway just thought I'd introduce my self and say hi and good luck to all

Becky


----------



## BeckyB2011

Hi, I'm new on here. As with most newbies I'm confused about all the abbreviations.  But I'm sure I'll figure them out eventually.  My partner and i had a civil partnership last APril and we have planning to start a family for ages and finally went for 1st IUI using anonymous donor a few days ago.  This 2ww is a nightmare.  I feel like a kid waiting for Christmas, so I'm pleased I came across this forum and found lots of people in similar circumstances to share with.    Anyway just thought I'd introduce my self and say hi and good luck to all

Becky


----------



## Pinktink

hello

welcome to the 2ww madness...

fingers crossed for you guys x


----------



## lmb15

Hi Becky,
Welcome!! The abbreviations are  a bit confusing at first. If you post a list of those you don't understand, I'll tell you what they mean!
Best of luck on the 2ww (2 week wait  )
Lisa x


----------



## BizzE3

Hi All! 
Just thought I would introduce myself, I'm new to the world of IVF and all it brings! 
Myself and my partner have been wanting to start a family for a while and recently took the plunge, hoping to have ivf through one of the egg sharing programmes. We are hoping that I can donate to my partner, and she gets pregnant. 

However... the first round of tests have found my AMH is 2.51 pmol.. not looking promising! The clinic are still optimistic about our chances as I have a few follicles and am only 28 so (hopefully) any eggs will be good quality. 

Now that we can't join the egg sharing programme - I might not have enough for our own needs, let alone someone elses! We are looking for cheaper clinics and considering the option of ivf abroad.. 
So far I have found that it isn't possible in Spain (sharing eggs with my partner is classed as surrogacy, which is illegal there), Russia (you must already have a child in order to legally donate to someone else), and Czech Republic ("sorry no, you must be a couple" !!!) 

Does anyone know of counties in Europe where ivf and egg sharing IS possible for same sex couples?? 

Any suggestions would be gratefully received! 
Beth xx


----------



## rubypop2

Hi Beth
There was an interesting article in one of the weekend supplements (the family section of the Guardian, if not it would have been the Observer,... and I am pretty sure it was the one on Saturday 5th or sun 6th of February, I'm sure you could look it up at the Guardians website) it was about a single woman, who had gone to a fertility clinic in Denmark, because it was much, much cheaper.  Now her situation was a little different as she went for AI (donor sperm from the clinics bank) and all in she paid £460, which is so much more affordable than an equivalent treatment here.  Perhaps Denmark would be a place to look?  The woman in the article was able to travel there and back in a day, budget airlines etc.  I hope this helps a little.


----------



## Clacey

hello,

just wanted to introduce ourselves.  Partner and I have been on nhs waiting list for diui and ivf for a while now. The goal posts have been moved a few times with waiting so we're about to embark on a private treatment of diui. We're based in Wales.

best wishes.


----------



## pinkrainbow

hello people,
this is my first attempt at writing and expressing mine and my partners situation.so here goes.
we have been together for years and years,and last year we had a civil partnership,finally.
we decided we would get married, then, try for a baby.not long after we were married,
my partners mum was diagnosed with lung cancer,her prognosis was not good,so we put having a baby on the 'backburner' so we could care for my mums partner.she died just before christmas,(six weeks later)and it has been an horrendous time,to say the least.
anyway,before we got married we went to see our g.p. and told him our intentions and asked  him to refer us for i.v.f.
once we got into the new year,we decided to go ahead with our  plans.so we went to see are g.p. again,asked him wether or not he had referred us,and to put it plainly he hadnt,due to the fact that we wernt infertile,and it is because of our lifestyle,that we are not ,or so we thought.
he then preceded to tell us that our local nhs trust has now suspended all funding for ivf,due to the austerity measures,it will be reviewed annually,as it is of a low priority to our health trust.
we then thought,we would go private,and have i.u.i.we attended the m.f.s open  evening,and my partner had an anti mullerian hormone test,shock horror ,she got the results back and she has a reading of  0.33.well as you could imagine there has been tears,and disbelief.we are both numb,by the whole experience.dont really know what to do or say next.thats why we joined this forum to get any input.thanks.


----------



## BizzE3

Hi Pinkrainbow, 
It sounds like you've had a really tough few months. I've also recently been diagnosed with low AMH, it's a shock eh? I don't know how to post the link to it (technologically challenged), but there is a thread on here for people who have gone ahead with ivf with low AMH, and quite a few success stories. From what I can gather, it is still quite a new test and things aren't always as bad as the test results can imply. As for a way forward, it's probably best to have a chat with the doctor at your clinic. We were advised ivf is the only option for us, and that while the chances of success are reduced, it's still well worth giving a try. 
As for the NHS... we were also told it wasn't available for free as we're a same sex couple not infertile.. I guess that's changed now, but the waiting list is so long here that we aren't going to bother going back. We're hoping I can donate eggs to my partner, the NHS consultant was baffled by the prospect! 
Anyway, I'm quite new to this whole thing myself, but let me know if I can help with anything or just message me if you want a chat about it. The low amh thread has been really helpful for me, some very supportive ladies on there xx


----------



## catherine238

hi all my name is catherine im a newbee to all this so here it goes lol
me and my dp have been together for 2 and half years. living in northern ireland. we both knew from the start we both wanted kids. so 6 months ago we both went to gp about the nhs route to getting pregnant he was honest that he didnt have a clue ( i know...) so refered us to gynae in our hospital. Just the other day i recieved a letter for an appointment. of course i want all to go well so was wondering if anyone could help with what criteria we need to meet and basically what to expect?? 
the next option is clinic but trying this route first.
my main concern is that we were to buy a house this year together but deposit prices are high so we moved home to save for that other half and this might hinder our chances as well as everyother thing that could make it go wrong lol

any help would be grateful 

reading all these personal stories is really inspiring and gives great hope!!

catherine xx


----------



## laurac1988

Hey all,

I'm Laur ana dme and my DP Amy are wanting to start a family after our CP last October.

Considering insemination at home. Looking at options at the moment. Hopeful  And scared !

xxx


----------



## odineen

Hi ladies .... We are beginning our journey with care manchester ES and I saw your post @ pinkrainbow.
We went through GP got refused by NHS due to not being infertile then went to MFS for testing to ES. My girlfriend who will be donating her eggs was also diagnosed with a bad ASH level by MFS and refused. The way in which they gave the news was poor to say the least, however don't take their word. I contacted Care as my g/f had a good FSI level but poor ASH from MFS, they told us that they take into account the above 2 tests and do a scan. They said the ASH test isn't a definite test. Anyway to cut a long story short we went to Care who were fantastic and the scan showed that we can go ahead and ES. Infact the scan showed she might have PCOS which should have meant a very high ASH so don't take MFS word for it ....... 

Hope this helps and sorry if Ive got my ash and fsi and pdqs wrong the jargon is soooooo hard lol


----------



## lucky2010

odineen... your post has made me complete my egg share application for care after giving up on egg sharing following a raised amh at MFS... thank-you x


----------



## tooties

get a cuppa, this might be a long one....!

I've been with my partner for 20 yrs and always wanted a child of my own. She already had 2 kids when we got together and we raised them together with the dads input too. We kept our relationship a secret for years to avoid any bullying etc for the kids. In fact, my partner only came out at work 5 yrs ago when we went thro our civil partnership.

I've been putting my needs to be a mother on the backburner for years and the biological clock has been ticking. In my mid 30s we started down the IVF route but ovarian cyst & laparoscopy delayed things, then a house move, eldest daughter wedding etc.... so have just turned 40 and been told my FSH level is too high - Dec was 24, got retested in March was 17.2. Clinic won't give me IVF and to be honest we only have 10K to spend anyway, so this would probably only give me one go?

I was told my only option was embryo donation, which I am looking into but opportunities seem few and far between. I'm desolate, heartbroken, I can't function, my whole idea of identity is wrapped up in having a child of my own. I've had weeks off work and can't stop crying.

I can't carry on like this but can't reconcile to the idea of not even trying to conceive.... I just seem to be stuck in limbo and with no direction to go in, I'm not improving. I have to go back to work in just over a week and I can't see how I'm going to manage to get through a day without tears.

Its like I don't know who I am anymore if I can't have a baby. To make matters worse, my best friend has just had a baby and my step daughters pregnant. My partner is very supportive, but we can't carry on like this, I need to sort myself out.

Please, please can anyone help me, advise me or throw me a lifeline to cling to ..... I'm in such a state I don't know what to do. 

I know I have been very lucky in having a part in my step childrens lives, and I love them very much, but I have never been a parent and I don't feel ready to skip straight to grandma without being a mother first.....

I'm very confused and very upset. Please tell me what to do, even if its simple things that seem obvious, please tell me I can't think straight 

I read this saying, 'cry a river, build a bridge, get the F**k over it' which I like, but I can't get past the crying stage and really need some help


----------



## Strawbs78

oh hun, I didnt want to read and run..  So does the fsh level means that counts you out altogether? I.e. have you called around to other clinics as a lot of them have differing requirements.. Have you looked in to overseas clinics? I hear good things coming out of Denmark and at a much lower cost..  

Just because you are 40 does not mean it cannot happen for you, my old boss his wife was 42 when they had their first (and only) so unless it is because of the fsh I wouldnt think your age is a barrier necessarily (although it is definitely harder the older you get)..

Hope you get something sorted hon x


----------



## lucky2010

Hi Tooties,


Do you have regular cycles and do you know if you ovulate ok? Have you thought of donor insemination, not using a clinic? We conceived our son this way and the only cost was that of all the sexual health tests.


Good luck,


Rach


----------



## mcclean

Hi I joined FF a few weeks back now.

I started my journey today. 

I was very tearful today during my consultation as I am doing this all alone.  Waited for miss right she never came along so just getting on with it as biological clock is ticking.

If there is anyone in the same boat as me feel free to get in touch.


----------



## odineen

Morning all,

Lucky I'm so glad that you are going to give another fertility clinic a try! I was devastated when MFS came back and said I couldn't es I thought that they were telling me that I couldn't have kids! Care were very positive about everything and weren't quick to jump to decisions!

Tooties your story is suck a heart breaking story. However I would also advise you the same don't give up on your dreams and don't stop at one fertility clinic. Make sure they do all the bloods before the cancel out the fact that you can't have any children! Make sure you do your research on the clinic. I know by the sounds of it you may only have one go due to the cost. Where are you based?

Orla xx


----------



## welshginge

Hello ladies & welcome. I hope your journey's are short & positive one's. I went through Care & got pregnant, I would recommend them! Best of luck! x


----------



## elphie

OK Hi everyone

New to this whole posting thing, looked at the site throughout my last cycle but never posted/engaged.  
Thought I would give it a go this time.  
It's been such a difficult journey so far, right from the very first doctors visit to ask for a referral to the hospital, don't think I have ever felt so humiliated in all my life doc was just so nasty I can't even tell you!  
Anyhow when we eventually started cycling, it all went so well, top grade embie put back   and then BFN 2 weeks later, so upsetting  .  
We have one frosty left so will be keeping our fingers crossed for that, going to see the clinic on Monday to sort out dates, paperwork etc.  We had funding for 1 IVF and one FET so if this does not work then not sure what our next step will be as we wont have the funds for a long while  
xxx


----------



## tooties

Thanks for your replies... very much

Strawbs - I see what you mean, I have only talked to the one clinic about my fsh level, although from what I've read on the internet, clinics tend to like levels under 12? must be worth a try tho. And I'll look into clinics in Denmark, I saw someone comment on this on here recently.

Rach, this is definitely a good idea, one that I hadn't really considered.... as the poor ovarian reserve doesn't mean a good egg will never come along.... so now I just need to find a sperm donor.... you can't buy sperm anymore can you? We don't know any potential donors so would need to get donor sperm. I'm not sure a clinic would do AI with such a high fsh?

Thanks again guys for your replies, I've really hit rock bottom so its nice to know you were there and to get a fresh perspective on it ..... x


----------



## tooties

Hi Orla, sorry, I missed your comment last night. I'm based in Berkshire and went to the Oxford Fertility Unit this time. I'm still very unsure about prices, but basic prices for IVF don't seem to include all the extras like drugs, sperm etc so I'm assuming we won't get more than one go with 10K.......?


----------



## odineen

Hi Tooties

The first clinic I went to tested my fsh at 13. I didn't want to give up so went to a different one that scanned my ovaries to see my reserve which came back at 30+. The specialist said that the results contradict themselves! As I was verging on PSOS and that the FSH is not the be all and end all! I know the clinic that we are going through ( Care Manchester)  will look at everyone and will try their hardest to get results and there are a few dotted about! You want to look at a clinic that prides them self on results and at least that way you know that they want the same results as much as you do!

Orla xx


----------



## tooties

Orla, thats amazing, I haven't even heard of scannning the ovaries to see whats there! I'll look this up on the internet. I've read some really good comments about Care on here, I need an equivalent down south! Apart from just reading clinics swebsite though, I'm at a loss as to how to research them or maybe I should say what to look for - I really am a newbie!
I can't thank you all enough for your replies x


----------



## odineen

Hi Tooties

We checked out the hfea website, you can put in you postcode and it will give you a list of the clinics in your area. Then you can check out their results.
We then went onto the website for the clinic and checked it out, if they sounded good then we checked out forums to get real life experiences. Think we might become private eyes lol A lot of clinics also have open nights where you can go get a tour and meet the staff. 
At the end of the day it sounds like a lot of work but this is probably the most important choice you will make and although it can be frustrating as this all takes time, you will feel better once you find a clinic that you feel understands your needs. Hope this helps


----------



## rachiebabe

hello ladies

i have been lurking on this site for ages and have decided to finally post as i would really like some support, banter and advice.

my lovely partner and myself have just had our first IUID on 21 March. got my AF yesterday and as you can guess we are absolutely devastate - esp since we had all the symptoms and signs like cramps, heartburn, pink spotting etc.. we went to MFS.
we have been going in and out of hospital for the past 15 months having tests etc but because we are same sex and there is nothing deemed wrong with me fertility wise, we were told by the NHS that our PCT wouldn't fund our treatment - even though they would fund it up to 6 times for a hetro couple!?  Obviously we understand that we have to pay for the D sperm which isn't an issue but they wouldn't do the treatment. so anyways we decided - well pushed into having to go private. we have just spent in excess of £1600 and can not believe i got an BFN. the past 2 weeks have been the most anxious of my life and to add to it i got the worst thrush ever - which then , last wed started to become really sore to the point where we were thinking of getting me to casualty as i was in that much pain. went straight to GP next day and turns out i had a batholin cyst size of a hens egg !!! . .she prescribed antibiotics and now bloody thrush is back! doc recons got cyst through stress - how are you not supposed to stress in the TWW though?
anyways i just wanted to say hi. we are  saving again (as well as paying off CC as IUI went on that!) and trying out Copehagen end of summer. anyone been and any tips/advice?

thanks in advance and thank god for this site!


----------



## odineen

Hi  Rach,

Me and DP had a similar story to you. We decided last June that we wanted to expand our family bigger than our 2 dogs and 2 cats. Went to our GP and got referred to tameside for further tests. We were then referred to St Marys at which point got refused due to being same sex couple. We tried to fight it but got no where! We then debated our finances thinking that we would do DIUI how ever when looked into it more decided that egg sharing might be a more suitable option as the cost was the same and the results are meant to be more successful. Got refused at MFS and are now waiting on the last of my bloods and counselling session and hoping that we should start May June time!

I'm sure that tww id the most stressful time ever! What's making you go away for your next try?

Orla


----------



## rachiebabe

Hi Orla

reason we are thinking of going away to Copenhagen is that is it so much cheaper than here. we have some airmiles - which i need to look at and see if we can get to Copenhagen on - and the actual cost of IUID is under £300! with accommodation for a night or two and spends this would all come in around half price of the cost of treatment here again. Plus we have heard some good stuff from CFC so we may as well give it a go.

It sucks doesn't it not being able to be treated like other couples on the NHS. totally unfair!


----------



## Mollymoonbeam

Hi, my sister is having IVF treatment just now and swears by fertility friends!  I'm a single lesbian and I am absolutely desperate to have a baby.  My partner and I split because I want to have children and she doesn't.  I'm financially secure and I work as a teacher (perfect hours and holidays!).  I can provide a very good life for a child and I am desperate to get pregnant.  I contacted the NHS fertility clinic who sent me out a form requesting details about myself and my partner, whom the form indivates they assume is male.  I've completed my part and a covering letter but I have a few fears based on things I've read/heard from other people:
1  Will the NHS refuse treatment if you are single?
2  Will the NHS refuse treatment if you are overweight?
I'm 34 years old, 5'2" and weigh 13 stone.  My BMI is 33.5.  I exercise for an hour every day and I'm really active throughout the day too.  I run 10k races and I enter into charity distance cycling events.  I know I'm physically quite fit but I still worry that I will be refused treatment on the NHS.  

Can I arrange sperm donation online?  Can anyone out there help me to know where to start?!  Thanks so much and congratulations to all the wonderful mummies who have become pregnant through donor insemination.  There are some fantastic messages on this message board!  Kind regards, Mollymoonbeam


----------



## sass30

Hi all,
my partner and i have been together for nearly 4 years and have talked and talked until we were talked to death about having kids. finally plucked up the courage to do it. we have first consultation on 27th of june . hoping to do egg sharing with DS if not then it will be IVF lite/DS or IUI/DS . cant tell you all how excited we are about this prospect of being mammys, just thinking of it now brings a tear to my eye. we have choose LWC Darlington for treatment so fingers and toes crossed for us  

thanks
sarah


----------



## odineen

Hi Sass
Welcome to the emotional roller coaster that is IVF lol.
Have you had all your tests done yet ?
We are with Care Manchester and have just had all our blood tests done and counselling. It's the waiting that's hard, once you have the tests it takes 4 - 6 weeks to get the results back and then you can be waiting another 2 weeks for your appointment to see the counsellor.
We are now waiting to get matched, it's getting closer now


----------



## K8L

Hi.  New to the boards.  Been with DP for coming up 7 years and in CP for just over 2 years.  First consultation at the LWC booked for May.  Very excited.  Trying to be good to our bodies in preparation.  All being well, we intend for me to carry using DP's eggs.  We'll see!!! xx


----------



## mechelleclaire

Okay, so I'm new here to the site my name is Mechelle and I have been married to my amazing other half for nearly two years (come July). We have talked for a few years about starting a family and have found a donor who is willing to help us. He is an amazing guy, actually he's a doctor who is also in a same-sex marriage. We haven't started trying yet because I have been having some problems with ovulation and menstruation. I had some issues about painful periods as a teenager when I was younger and was put on the pill to help, but came off two and a half years ago when we first discussed having a baby. In those two and a half years I haven't had a period at all (I was always really regular before I started the pill), so went to the doctor and after some tests, was told I had PCOS. I was disheartened because I want to carry our child. When we told the doctor that we wanted to start trying for a baby with our donor, she said the best thing to do was to refer us to a fertility specialist before we try insemination. 
The first appointment is next week and I'm excited, but worried about it at the same time. You just hear so many stories about the NHS refusing treatment to same-sex couples and it's so expensive to go private. We have also been talking about maybe having her eggs inseminated then implanted into me. Can anyone give me some tips about this? Also, a really stupid question, but if we were to do this, ie, her eggs and me carrying, who's name would be on the birth certificate? We thought this would be a nice idea for us because of my problems and because it's the closest we would actually get to the baby being a part of both of us. 
All replies about your experiences would be great

Thanks


----------



## Katie1086

Hi Everyone,

I am new to the site. My partner and I have been together for 4 years (married for nearly 1!) and we have been discussing having children for a while. We had our first consultation at LWC London last month and all of our results were good so we are having our first attempt via IUI/DS this month!

It is all very exciting and since our appt last month time has been going soooo slowly.

Fingers crossed things go well this month! And fingers crossed for anyone else TTC

Scottishrose x


----------



## Pinktink

hi - welcome to FF   

Good luck for your IUI


----------



## tmmurrin

Hi! Wanted to join & share our experience after reading so much from everyone else! Thank you!


----------



## Katie1086

Welcome to FF tmmurrin.

Where abouts are you in you ttc? My partner and I are planning on having our first attempt at IUI this wkend (if we get a positive result from our ovulation test!)

Scottishrose x


----------



## 2mums4baby

Hello girls,

My wife and myself are about to embark on DI with the possibility of IVF(egg share) if things don't quite work with the DI! All very exciting! I am 31 and have a 9y/o daughter from a previous relationship and will be the 'incubator' for our child 

I started ovulation testing last month and usually have a nice steady cycle of 30 days average. 
This month I tested on days 14 to 21, no LH surge detected (previous test showed surge on day 16) Now on day 40 and no sign of period. This is looking to be a very long cycle and making me worry that I'm going to need more than just straight forward IUI.

I'm probably just 'getting myself at it' and worrying over nothing, but its hard when everything usually trots along at nice monthly intervals! I always thought I would be a regular ovulator what with the 30day cycles.

So, we're off to the LWC on Saturday and Agora next month for their open days. We'll also talk to the Wessex/Freya and the Complete Fertility Center too (they are much closer to us, as we're nearer Southampton).

Fingers crossed and goodluck to all you other ladies TTC!


----------



## Katie1086

Hello 2mums4baby

Welcome to FF!

Thats fab news about you TTC! My Partner and I are starting our TTC this month for our first. We are having IUI at the LWC and are hoping to go this Saturday (fingers crossed) 

I completely understand how you feel about the waiting for something to happen and it not turn up. I am normally very regular and my period turned up late this month which stressed me out!

Anyways good luck with your TTC and if you ever need someone to talk to drop me a line!

All the best!

Scottishrose


----------



## 2mums4baby

Thanks Scottishrose, 

Im finding this site very informative. More so than some of the others I have been on. The diarys are fascinating and an eye opener to what we may end up going through!

Goodluck to you and your lady, fingers crossed you get a BFP first time!


----------



## tmmurrin

Hi Scottishrose!
I'm keeping our abbreviated story in the signature ... shame TTC isn't that simple!
I was going to ask how you got on ... but can see from your signature it wasn't so good! 
What advice were you given about having your follicle scan? as Day 15 seems late to me ... I started going Day 8 as I had a short cyle, which has now regulated to 28/9 days, so now go on Day 10. My my ovulation surge is being detected just days after and then I'm in for treatment!!
T.


----------



## JSue

Hi everybody 

Myself and my partner have been ttc using diui.  had the first in march which didn't work and the second te following month, both were unstimulated and both failed.  The next iui is going to be using fertility drugs and I'm really nervous (and excited).  I have always suffered with extreme pmt and I'm worried that that mood swings etc will be even worse using the drugs!  Actually I'm pretty scared of everything at the moment, having a wobbly day. My partner at work and I'm on a day off, usually really enjoy bit of me time but not today. Everthing just feels that much more difficult being gay and trying to conceive, I'm not usually like this, I'm the biggest gay advocate, out in work from day one and out everywhere if anybody asks.  But sometimes it just feels so heavy.  

Anyways hoping to make some new friends here and honest I'm not usually this negative!!

Jill xxxxx


----------



## bethsarah

Hi All,

My wife and I are wanting to start our family but we have no idea where to start. We have scoured the internet for information and there are loads of sites but none of them are detailed enough. We really want to hear from others who have been in the same situation and how you went about it. I think the only way we will be able to make a decision that is right for us, is to learn from peoples real stories. So I look forward to reading your lovely stories about starting your families.

also, we've read other posts and really dont understand the abbreviations.

Beth & Sarah


----------



## Pinktink

hello 

This is a great source of information. The abbreviations you get used to! Here is a list copied from an FF post

These are basically a type of shorthand for some of the more regularly used words on *FF*. Here is a brief list of the most common ones:

2WW = 2 Week Wait (the nailbiting period between embryo transfer/ovulation/basting and pregnancy testing)
AF / Aunt Flo = Menstrual cycle
BFN /







= Big Fat Negative 
BFP /







= Big Fat Positive
BMS = Baby Making Sex
DE = Donor Egg 
DH = Dear/Darling Husband 
DN = Dear Neice/ Nephew
DP = Dear Partner 
DW = Dear Wife 
DD = Dear Daughter
DS = Dear Son 
DX =Diagnosis
D/R = Down Regulation (the first stage of long protocol IVF)
DPT or DPO = Days past transfer or Days past ovulation.
EC = Egg collection
ET = Embryo Transfer 
FET = Frozen Embryo Transfer
FSH = Follicle Stimulating Hormone
HPT = Home Pregnancy Test.
IF = Infertility 
M/C = Miscarriage
OPK = Ovulation Predictor kit
OTD = Official test day
Pee stick = Home Pregnancy Test 
PG = Pregnant
PM = personal message (sometimes IM is used)
PUPO = Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise (i.e. on the 2ww)
SA = Semen Analysis 
TTC = Trying To Conceive 
TX = Treatment

Hopefully it covers most of the ones that are confusing you!

My partner and I looked into the options when we started - the first thing I think you need to think about is your feelings about the donor - if you want a known or unknown donor, if a known donor, if you want a co-parenting type relationship or how much (if any) contact you want the donor to have with your children. This pretty much influences whether you go down the at-home route or if you decide you want to use anon sperm (until the child is 18 at least!) then you will need to go via a clinic.

We decided that we didnt want a known donor so went down the clinic route - we looked at the two main options of IUI and IVF and decided that we would rather go straight to IVF as the success rates are much higher... it also comes with a higher price tag - although for one of our cycles we did a thing called egg-sharing which reduces the cost but involves donating half of your eggs to another couple/woman. There are a lot of open days with clinics that you can go to which will explain the clinic options - where abouts do you live?

There are a lot of girls on here who have done/are doing at home insems so I will leave it for one of them to go into that process as my info is limited.

It is very complicated when you first start but with a bit of research it should become easier.

HTH (Hope this helps!)

Lynn


----------



## Candy76

Lynn,
Many thanks for that comprehensive list of abbreviations!

Beth & Sarah,
As Lynn said, open days at clinics are a good starting point for getting info about IUI / IVF and egg sharing. We went to two of them, the first time we listened to the information and the second time we asked loads of questions.

I know a couple of couples who went to a weekend workshop about 6 years ago, which helped them decide which route to go with. BUT: I can't for the life of me remember which organisation offered this  . I just trailed the internet for Rainbow Families and found this Parenting guide "We are Family", which seems to cover all possibilities - from IVF to co-parenting to adoption. Happy reading!

http://www.lgf.org.uk/we-are-family/

Yes, and do talk to people who have gone through it. For us this has been incredibly helpful, and still is.

Candy

/links


----------



## bethsarah

Thanks so much Candy and Lynn, this is exactly the sort of thing we were hoping for. We'll have a read tonight.

We live near Leeds so there are a couple of clinics there and we've got an appointment with our doctor when we return from holiday in a few weeks. 

Thanks again and we'll be back with more questions I'm sure.

B & S


----------



## Blondie80

Hello!

Another newbie checking in!

Wife and I are TTC#2 (although #2 will my first "bio" child) through AI with a KD.  We had a bash last month, got the timing all wrong - and so are eagerly waiting for try no. 2 this month.

I am a huge symptom spotter, was convinced I was pregnant last month for about 4 days, then convinced I wasn't for the rest of the month, can get massively obsessive and spend all day, every day on google, googling every single twinge! I swear, my wife wanted to lock me up - it's a wonder she's up for round 2!

*waves at everyone*

Blondie80


----------



## lucky2010

Welcome!!

I'm a symptom spotter too so empathise (currently symptom spotting on 2ww #13 ttc #2)

Good luck with your journey xx


----------



## Blondie80

Thank you, sooo glad to hear I'm not the only loon!! 

Oh, and our boys are almost the same age! 

GLGLGL and BD!
x


----------



## Starfish78

Hi everyone,

I've been reading posts as a guest for a while now, and have found it so helpful, so decided to get on with it and stop lurking and join! My partner and I have been talking about starting a family for years and years (and years...) and finally started trying in Jan 2011 with KD, AI at home. I have found the 2ww incredibly tough each time we have tried (and was relieved to see from the threads that my experience is not in the slightest bit unique! - I was convinced I would be more chilled than I was in reality!!). I think because we've talked about having a family for what feels like so long I feel like it's been years of trying rather than just the 3 cracks we've had at it!

Anyway without rambling on too much it's really nice to be on here as a member and not a lurking guest, and I'm very grateful for the support and reassurance I have already received indirectly from the site, so thanks.

June AI coming up so fingers crossed, and for everyone else.....I'll post on the 2ww thread once I'm back in that dreaded/desired place!

Starfish x


----------



## Steph29

Starfish 78

Welcome and good luck with your journey.


----------



## Candy76

Welcome Starfish! Yes, I know what you mean when you say you feel like you have been trying for years. We have 'only' had 6 goes, but our journey started 4 years ago at the GP asking for a referral (which was rejected, then we complained, then we got our referral). We spent most of the time waiting for the next appointment or the next treatment. And yes, we feel like we have been trying for 4 years.

Good Luck!!!


----------



## Starfish78

Hi Candy and Steph, thanks for the welcome.

Yeah it's odd isn't it Candy, I found that it was really affecting my disappointment each month and now am trying to keep the facts and stats in my mind to keep things in perspective, but it's easier said than done! I'm curious about your referral, I was under the impression that you could only get a referral as a f/f couple if you had known fertility difficulties, and also that it was at the discernment of your PCT. How did it work with you? And what did you get as a result of the referral? Treatment +/- tests??

Starfish x


----------



## Candy76

Hi Starfish, we needed a referral as the closest clinic was an NHS clinic and in order to get an appointment there we needed a referral, even if you wanted self-funded private treatment.
This was 4 years ago and it is still the case now. We have just this week been at an opening evening in Bristol (also NHS clinic) where we still would have needed a referral in order to receive private treatment.
Once we got our first appointment (after about 8 months waiting) we were told the conditions for funded treatment in Wales: either you have tried at home for 1 year unsuccessfully or you had 3 failed stimulated IUI.
However, we then went to a private clinic that had opened in the meanwhile. You don't need a referral for a private clinic.


----------



## Blondie80

From one newbie to another *waves @ Starfish*


----------



## Starfish78

Cheers for the info on the referrals Candy, I think because we only ever thought of going down the private route and visited a couple of private clinics we hadnt even thought about the NHS side of things. It's good to know the options. I hope the next stage becomes clearer for you, I read your other thread.

Hi Blondie! Good luck as you try for number 2 . I also spend an awful lot of time on google during the 2ww, and find that virtually every symptom I have there was a pregnant woman somewhere who had had the same, so it ended up feeling pointless, and sadly I wasn't pregnant any of the times! so I am now more determined to keep away from the internet searches but we'll see on the next 2ww how well that goes!


----------



## Blondie80

I hear you, I ovulated today, so we inseminated/BD (I hate the acronyms.. whatever its supposed to be called!) and so I am officially in the 2ww. 

I need my wife to tape shut my laptop and cut off my phone now!

One thing I've noticed, is that you see SO many more pregnant women when TTC, they are everywhere!


----------



## Starfish78

Hilarious, I was walking around town today and swear I saw at least 15 pregnant women... 

Good news on the ovulation and insem - hanging around waiting is a different kind of torture isn't it!?  (what is BD ??) 

I was due to be high today and ovulate tomorrow but cbfm said low today which was very confusing. ho hum. Hopefully see you over on the 2ww thread in a few days.... get that computer shut! (PS the most amusing 2ww internet-search result ended with my wife diagnosing me as having pregnancy acne, which of course if I had been pregnant would have been fine, but since I wasnt...... )


----------



## charlruk

Sending   to all of you! We know how hard it is and also spent lots of time googling!!! (and still do !!) 

Welcome to all newbies, and hope you manage to sort treatment/clinics/ funding ect soon, it is so frustrating that at lesbian couples we are not entitled to nhs treatment!! 

Char and Chelle. Xx


----------



## Blondie80

Starfish78 said:


> Hilarious, I was walking around town today and swear I saw at least 15 pregnant women...
> 
> Good news on the ovulation and insem - hanging around waiting is a different kind of torture isn't it!? (what is BD ??)
> 
> I was due to be high today and ovulate tomorrow but cbfm said low today which was very confusing. ho hum. Hopefully see you over on the 2ww thread in a few days.... get that computer shut! (PS the most amusing 2ww internet-search result ended with my wife diagnosing me as having pregnancy acne, which of course if I had been pregnant would have been fine, but since I wasnt...... )


   @ your wife!

BD is what they use in other forums, not sure if they use it here -it's Baby Dancing! I *hate* it!

So do you only get one high and then one peak on your CBFM?

.. I will, I will, I will, I MUST shut my computer soon, I will. I have to get #1 to nursery in a moment and hope that the car will make it there (it seemed to start having some problems this weekend)...

And thank you for the welcome Char and Chelle, congrats on your pregnancy


----------



## Starfish78

Thanks for the welcome Char and Chelle - and many congrats on your pregnancy. It's great to be on a site with all the positive results around as well as the heartache.

Re. the cbfm Blondie, it has totally confused me this month - I am clearly ovulating today (woke up with egcm, sorry if TMI) but the monitor said low      (I also did a different clearblue stick yesterday eve which showed 2 lines v. clearly)    Maybe it needs a clean? I am going to ignore it as I am sure today's the day. Seeing donor later all being well.  The last 2 times we used cbfm it seemed clear - 2 highs then a peak (with the automatic 2nd peak as Rach says - thanks Rach!) and 2nd time I got 3 highs then a peak. So this is a hiccup as was starting to rely on the machine, but my body feels like it's doing the right thing so I'll go with that.

Anyone else had totally randome results from the cbfm ? any remedy?

How old is your little one Blondie? were you a long time TTC no 1 ?

Have a good day all. I ought to crack on with some work....


----------



## BecsW

Huge welcome Blondie and Starfish and very, very best of luck to you both with your treatments  

Re:NHS referrals, we were told that each PCT has it's own terms and conditions so some PCTs will accept same sex couples without fertility difficulties. At the time that we were first going through treatment our PCT would not    but I know others did (some offered 3 IUIs and 1 IVF) so it is worth checking, you never know, in this postcode lottery you may happen to be in a PCT that does accept same sex couples for NHS treatment,
Becs x


----------



## Starfish78

Thanks Becs, that's really good to know. Probably worth us checking it out now so we know where we stand with our PCT. I'd like to think in Brighton they'd be open minded but I'm not sure that PCT attitudes reflect the demographics of an area, but they ought to! you never know...

Congrats on your LO, reading about so many of you that have been successful gives me so much hope.

Starfish x


----------



## Blondie80

Starfish78 said:


> Thanks for the welcome Char and Chelle - and many congrats on your pregnancy. It's great to be on a site with all the positive results around as well as the heartache.
> 
> Re. the cbfm Blondie, it has totally confused me this month - I am clearly ovulating today (woke up with egcm, sorry if TMI) but the monitor said low  (I also did a different clearblue stick yesterday eve which showed 2 lines v. clearly) Maybe it needs a clean? I am going to ignore it as I am sure today's the day. Seeing donor later all being well. The last 2 times we used cbfm it seemed clear - 2 highs then a peak (with the automatic 2nd peak as Rach says - thanks Rach!) and 2nd time I got 3 highs then a peak. So this is a hiccup as was starting to rely on the machine, but my body feels like it's doing the right thing so I'll go with that.
> 
> Anyone else had totally randome results from the cbfm ? any remedy?
> 
> How old is your little one Blondie? were you a long time TTC no 1 ?
> 
> Have a good day all. I ought to crack on with some work....


Thats so strange, do you think maybe a reset of the machine would help?

Though, that would be annoying as it would lose all the other data too. You are so right to use it in conjunction with other tests though, on another forum someoen recommended to me, testing with OPKs in the evening too! And funnily enough, I did the night before I ovulated and I could see the line was almost the same colour as the control line.

Trust your body, for sure - are you able to see your donor regularly (so you could potentially see them in a couple of days if you find out you are actually ovulating then?). We managed to see ours on two occasions last month, but this month only the once and Id like to inseminate at least 3 times. I have to keep reminding myself that it only takes once to get pregnant.

My little boy is 4 in August, he's not biologically mine or my wifes (so this will be my first pregnancy! SCARY!!). He is my wifes from a previous relationship. Though he lives with us, I am his full time 'carer' and he calls me mummy - so he is VERY much my son! <3

I had a miscarriage in 1997 (of twins) which plays heavily on my mind too with this TTC malarky too. Not having twins (that would be amazing, obv!), the miscarriage!

So we look like cycle buddies then! See you in the 2ww!?

Blondie x


----------



## Starfish78

Yeah I did think about resetting the machine but like you say I would loose the data (although I've written it down so it would be fine I guess). When I can be bothered I'll have a look at the instructions and try the troubleshooting section (if it's got one!).

I have to say that the more I have read about timing of ovulation the more confused I have got! I have a 27/28 day cycle and I tend to ovulate (according to OPKs) day 15/16 which strikes me as late for the length of my cycle. I thought that ewcm means you are ovulating 'now' but I suppose the process of the egg being released is just that, a process, so happens over a period of time?  I also had appleschnitzel pain today (I can never remember the real word so now that's what I call it - you know what I mean   )  so we're seeing donor friend tonight and tomorrow night. I can worry myself stupid about timing, so I'm trying to think good thoughts and not that I've missed the boat. DW's sister (who is straight and very open and honest about ttc - it worked for them first time!) said that as soon as you see the ewcm do it, as that's what the sperm live in.  I don't know. It's one of my biggest causes of worry, timing, it really is.

Our donor is a great friend, and lives half an hour away but lead very busy lives so we try to give them some notice and guesstimate the days (which I often get wrong). He and his partner also spend a lot of time in France which I sometimes find hard as I catch myself thinking "if it doesn't work this time then we cant try again for x months" which doesn't help anything, so I'm trying to be more chilled out this month. In fact, counter to all advice, DW is encouraging me to drink before the insem so I'm more relaxed!? 

I can understand the miscarriage plays on your mind, but from all I've read, it makes not a scrap of difference to your chances next time, and there's people on here who have gone on to have healthy pregnancies the next time they tried after a miscarriage so take heart, if you can. And you're absolutely right about how many times you see the donor, it only takes the once!

I will jump over to the 2ww thread tomorrow, we certainly are cycle buddies 

Starfish x


----------



## Blondie80

You know, I read that for lots of people you can ovulate early or late, which is why its important to BBT, or use something like the CBFM, so I dont think its uncommon at all, youve just got a short Luteal Phase.. which is great, less time to wait!!

Hope everything went OK with the donor, assuming it did, as we're seeing you in the 2ww thread!  

Haha, I wish my wife would encourage me to drink before the insem!! Doesnt sound like a bad idea at ALL to me. 

I understand your frustrated with your donor, I feel the same way - then I feel bad for feeling frustrated, as he is doing us a favour! Will your donor be involved in the childs life? 

We're finding it difficult to plan seeing the donor around our son, because on very short notice we have to find someone to watch him, usually its my mum - she knows what we are up to (we had to tell her), but this time recently, we had to ask friends on the day (as my mums away) and they thankfully were able to do it and bl00dy marvellous too. If we didnt have anyone to watch him, we just couldn't do it. I think I'd find that the hardest.

B x


----------



## TeamT

Hey all

We've been hanging around on the IUI and AMH threads for a bit but thought we should (and after prompting!) introduce ourselves here. The plan is that hopefully my wife and I will have one little'un each, with me being the first up.

A bit of background - we've been trying for about a year now and sadly so far it's not gone great. There might be some complications as my AMH came back off the scale low, despite all other tests seeming fine. After a few natural cycles, the clinic suggested clomid for the last one, but even though I had 4 mature follicles and a couple of smaller ones, none were successful. Twice I have had what seems to be pretty clear symptoms so we're thinking that maybe there is a quality issue. We're self-medicating DHEA for the next attempt which will be in July... it's worth a shot.

Mostly I'm bumbling around forums at the moment since I'm just eating pills but otherwise not much is happening...

Lots of positive vibes to you all   

Vicki @ TeamT


----------



## BecsW

Hey Vicki,
Great to see you posting here, huge welcome to you and DP   Sounds like your journey so far has been tough, sending lots of positive vibes to you too hoping that your dream will come true really soon   
Becs x


----------



## Charlie &#039;N&#039; Bec

Hey all,
My Wife and I are looking at starting treatment after October, Thats when i hit 30 and want to see it in with a bang  , We are looking for clinics around Essex, London way.. We want a nice quiet place not so clinical. I suffer from PCSO, diagnosed when I was 23, I was in a heterosexual relationship and we went through IUI, i had ovarian drilling and clomid, metformin, after the 2nd IUI did not work we had a break, thats when i came out and stopped treatment, when i stopped treatment i stopped treatment for my PCSO, i have ignored it since then, no treatment and had around 6 periods since i was 23, and as i said before I'm 30 this year. 
And in all honesty i feel I was way to young to go through fertility treatment and i didn't take anything in. 

So now a long time later I am Married to a wonderful, Lively beautiful Woman, who I Love more than I can explain. The subject of children has come up alot, and now i feel the time is right to start research, and to get myself in shape and start saving. 

So after myself waffling on (sorry for that) We were wondering what clinics are around, I used the  Essex fertility centre last time. 

We are looking at My partner donating her Egg to me and going through the IVF cycle, with donor sperm, this is all new to me so don't know the best treatment. 

Thanks in advance 

Charlie and Becki xx


----------



## jackielou

Hi all!
Tis all new stuff to me, had my first DI attempt today! Have been really calm up to now but am startin to feel the nerves   on 2ww got everythin crossed
L x


----------



## Blondie80

Hello and welcome! Come join us in the 2ww thread, if you havent already!

Blondie


----------



## BecsW

Huge welcome Jackie Lou!   Fingers crossed that it works for you, as Blondie has said, pop over to the 2ww thread, you'll find loads of friendly advice and support from the lovely ladies over there,
Becs x


----------



## jackielou

Thanks for the welcome and the heads up to join the 2ww club!
En rout old fruity!   
L x


----------



## LisaAndLaura

Hi everyone

Like most others, I've done a bit of lurking over the past few months.  Anyway, my partner has finally got a positive OPK today so we have the donor visiting for the first time tomorrow (he couldn't make it today).  We had a practice run last week, but would welcome any hints on the actual process as I'm worried something will go wrong.  Fingers crossed it all goes according to plan!

So, a bit about us... I'm 42, Laura's 31 and this will be her first child.  I have 3 teenagers from my previous marriage, and they're all excited at the prospect of a new family member.

Lisa & Laura xx


----------



## Hales :)

Welcome to the forum!


----------



## Blondie80

LisaAndLaura said:


> Hi everyone
> 
> Like most others, I've done a bit of lurking over the past few months. Anyway, my partner has finally got a positive OPK today so we have the donor visiting for the first time tomorrow (he couldn't make it today). We had a practice run last week, but would welcome any hints on the actual process as I'm worried something will go wrong. Fingers crossed it all goes according to plan!
> 
> So, a bit about us... I'm 42, Laura's 31 and this will be her first child. I have 3 teenagers from my previous marriage, and they're all excited at the prospect of a new family member.
> 
> Lisa & Laura xx


Welcome Lisa and Laura, just said hi to you on the other thread too!

That's fab you had a practise run, I remember we were nervous wrecks on our first go!

The best advice I was given, was about how to syringe the sperm out of the pot (there's a real knack to it, apparently) - our donor donates straight into a syringe, so we dont have to worry about that, thankfully. When you insem, try to aim for the cervix, orgasm after insem can really help, and bum up in the air afterwards! Cant remember for how long - Im too impatient to do anything longer than 20 mins!!

Blondie x


----------



## LisaAndLaura

Thanks for the welcomes   So what's the knack to syringing it out of the pot then?  We're (im)patiently waiting for him to arrive just now!! At this rate I will have chewed my nails down as far as my elbows before he gets here!  xx


----------



## jash

Hi. 
at last a thread for same sex couples going through IVF.!!!
My partner and I reached the decision to start a family last year.  I am the one that will be inseminated as my partner has 2 grown up children and more than happy for me to be the pregnant one!! Think she knows something I don't!.
We opted for Blastocyst as I am 44 and felt that perhaps my eggs would not be good enough for a positive result. 
We travelled to the Ukraine on a recommendation from a successful friend.  On 20th June 2011 I had my blast transfer of 3 embryos. From the donations, 6 were successful, 1 didn't make it to blast stage, 3 implanted and 2 frozen.
I am now on day 5 of my 2ww!! 
The effects so far are: sore, swollen boobs,swollen tummy and headaches.  Not sure if these signs are good or not! 
This is all very new to both of us and being a same sex couple, it would be lovely to hear from others in a similar (or looking to be) situation to share stuff with.

Jackie and Sharon.


----------



## lucky2010

Welcome Jackie and Sharon!

Come and join us on the 2ww thread. I'm also on the 2ww, otd 7th July.

Good luck,

Rach xx


----------



## Bellazim

HI everyone, I'm on the joy of 2ww...........well I'm on 1ww as of 1st July. had the joys of pessaries, the itch has finally gone   .
Its sooooooo hard, my partner bless her keeps asking me each day how do you feel...the progesterone pessaries make me   . oh and she's got PMT.   her really. 
Anyone based in Sussex?


----------



## Debbie&#039;s Wife

Hi Bellazim, welcome!

I'm from West Sussex 

Emma


----------



## Bellazim

OH MY GOD.................Im going crazy on this  . ok so got two more days to go.    .  
Woke up with stomach pain yesterday and felt really down, but woke up today to a different pain, more of an ovulation pain....So now im confused.....Trying to be positive and bought a pregnancy test today. OH has booked a long weekend in Barcelona as a surprise, we're flying out tomorrow so will testing while away which i guess will be lovely.


----------



## Anna.Wilson

Hello all

I thought I would join you if that was ok!

I am 26, my civil partner D is 30. D had an ectopic pregnancy in 2008, we used a private sperm donor and self insemination after many, many attempts. This time, I have just started my treatment leading up for ICSI. D injected my first DR Buserilin this morning and hope this isnt too much of a rollercoaster for us!!!!

I look forward to getting to know you all, and hope we can get through this together!   

FYI: my blood test is 25th july, scans on 3rd and 5th august as I have PCOS and hopefully EC w/c 8th august x

Anna x


----------



## Mish3434

Welcome Bellazim and Anna

Bellazim, Good luck for your 2ww    here is a link to a thread with other ladies currently on the 2ww http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=244867.1200

Anna, Good luck with your cycle xx

Shelley xx


----------



## tinabean

Hi 

Thought I would say Hi. Just did our first DI so on 2WW!!  Been and bought a pregnancy book for the first time. Hoping and wishing. Spoke to a friend who suggested moonstone crystal is good for pregnancy - so got one of those. In for a penny and all that 

It's nice to know I am not the only one but also know that PMA is a must. 

Tina xx


----------



## AngyF

Hi to you all

Hope you don't mind me joining the conversation? I'm 26 and my partner is 30. We or rather me, are 2dpiui, CD17 and officially in my 2WW, which is needles to say driving me psychotically insane.

This is our first IUI. I was on 100mg Clomid CD 3-8 and am now on progesterone and steroids CD 14 - 28. 

Well, that's where we are currently. Thank you for this wonderful site. So glad to know that we are not alone!

Good luck to you all! Holding thumbs for you all.

X0X0


----------



## lucky2010

Angy, hop over yo the 2ww thread, there are a few of us also waiting xx


----------



## minimonster

Hi everyone!
After 12 years together, lots of conversations and failed home inseminations, we've finally decided to take the plunge into IUI at LWC Cardiff.
Starting on Microgynon for 21 days today then on to stimming.
Just wanted to introduce myself as my partner and I have found the threads so useful in making decisions and getting prepared.
Has anyone had any issues with Microgynon?

Leanne x


----------



## Starbuck1980

Hello, I'm Emma and I am 31.

My wife and I have been married for almost 3yrs and we (or rather I) had our first round of IUI 13 days ago at King's College Hospital's Assisted Conception Unit. We are self funded under the NHS using my natural cycle, no stimms at present and we are using anon donor sperm provided by the clinic.

I just posted in the IUI topic as I had a few questions but I thought I would stop by and say hi!


----------



## MeowToTheMoon

Hi,

I'm just waiting for day 1 again so I can start on my first IUI.
I've been lurking for a while and posted a couple of times elsewhere, but I haven't had a formal plan until today so feel like I can finally 'join' ff for real.  

So, with any luck, this time next month, I'll be on a 2WW...  

Nice to meet you all


----------



## welshginge

Welcome Minimonster, Starbucks & Meow. Hope your journey is short & successful! Hop over to the other threads to chat.


----------



## johno21

Hello Ladies,

I just wanted to share our good news with you all. 
Official Test Day today and got a *BFP*.
secretly testing since Saturday and although it was early we have had positives  everyday since then ..... We thought is was too early to test because of the HCG but luckily for us it was genuine. Our digital test originally said 1-2 weeks but when tested today said 2-3 weeks pregnant so the HCG is rising. We called our clinic today and have our scan booked in for 8th Sept 2011.... seems such a long way away but will remain as focussed as we can and continue to be positive 
We really have been so lucky this far, as this is our 1st IUI attempt........OMG *still in shock*......and can only hope for our little miracle to continue growing ....

I have searched these forums and threads daily and nightly like a mad woman possessed and have found so many friendly and helpful information, stories and replies from people who have given us inspiration and hope.

I wanted to share this with you all, so that perhaps our journey (all be it much shorter than many) can give those of you, that are waiting and hoping for your BFP's some hope and determination to continue with your dreams of becoming parents, even if you think the odds are stacked against you.

Sending you all lots of    energy and  ......Dont give up.

I will of course let you know how our scan goes on the 8th.... ......

X Jane & Lisa X


----------



## BecsW

Jane and Lisa-that's fab, fab, fab news!    And so reassuring for us all that it can happen first time round, looking forward to hearing about your scan. You had medicated IUI didn't you? How many follies did you have in the end? Could it be more than one in there?


----------



## johno21

Hi Becs,

Thank you  and yes we did have medicated iui with Gonal F... ovitrelle trigger shot too. 
Seems like a lifetime ago but i just checked my post and she had 20mm, 19mm and 16mm and lots of little ones, so yes there is every possibility there could be more than one  

So very exciting and we are still in a bit of a daze, can not believe we have been so very very lucky so far. Everything crossed that things continue to go our way and our little one/s stay strong  .

Good luck with your journey and sending lots of     energy to you.

xJane & Lisax


----------



## charlruk

Amazing!! congratulations tou you both!!!  such exciting news!!! still a stressful time though worrying about everything!! 

Am sure you will find pregnency club page for you due date, we found ours really helpful and a source of sanity for all those natural worries that you have, and we still use it now to chat to others at the same stage of pregnancy! would definitely recommend it! 

Also, hop on to the LBGT pregnency/parenting  page, there is lots of us going through the same thing, and we are a friendly bunch!!  


Char and chelle.xxx

congrats again!!xxxx


----------



## 2011pink

Hiya ladies. I am so so so glad to have found this site. Its fantastic having so many other people to talk to and discuss worries etc. I have a DS and DD (both concieved naturally as I was struggling with my sexuality then and the fact I wanted children!)  I have now been with my DW for 4 years and we want to have a child together. We have found a donor   so now its all about timing....this is what Im most worried about as it not so straight forward when a 3rd party is involved is it? 
Ive seen some people use egg whites and was just wondering if this helps chances of conception? Also if I get ovulation kit what am I looking for and when is the best time to inseminate? You will have to excuse me as Im nt down with all the lingo just yet!!!!
Also this is a fab way to meet other lesbian parents which I think is great for our children!

Thanks.xx


----------



## johnno20000

Hi all

We are trying IUI in Denmark and have decided for 3 attempts, waiting to test in a few days after 2nd attempt. I am now 42 so if after 3 attempts at IUI without success we will go for DE at overseas clinic. I just figure this will give me the best chance of a healthy pregnancy and healthy child. Has anyone else gone from iui to de ivf- how did you do?


----------



## welshginge

Welcome ladies, if you haven't already, pop onto the other threads for chat!


----------



## johno21

Hey ladies

just wanted to update you all on our early scan today,   One baby heartbeat seen, currently measuring 7w1d and Due date given as 25/04/12.....Completely overwhelming and amazing all at once, still cant believe we are growing our own little miracle . How fabulous is that    praying things will stay good for us and baby J continues to grow stronger day by day...

Wishing and hoping for you all, will be checking in regularly to keep track of all your stories, and sending   vibes to you all.


X Jane


----------



## MeowToTheMoon

johno21 said:


> Hey ladies
> 
> just wanted to update you all on our early scan today,  One baby heartbeat seen, currently measuring 7w1d and Due date given as 25/04/12.....Completely overwhelming and amazing all at once, still cant believe we are growing our own little miracle . How fabulous is that   praying things will stay good for us and baby J continues to grow stronger day by day...
> 
> Wishing and hoping for you all, will be checking in regularly to keep track of all your stories, and sending  vibes to you all.
> 
> How incredibley exciting! So glad your scan was good.
> Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy.
> X
> X Jane


----------



## slavinder

Hi, me and my partner are looking to start a family within the next year or 2.  Our CP is next April 
we've spoken to a friend to see how he felt about donating, he's thinking about it, but its tricky as we're all trying to strike the right balance of involvment etc - so fraught with things to consider! 

So this is us!

Be great to chat with some folks in the same (ish) Boat!


----------



## Ready4ababy

hey folks. First time posting here. My hubby (ftm transsexual) are have been ttc for about 2 yrs now but cant seem to find a suitable sperm donor. The banks are too expensive and the only other options seem to be a v good friend or a guy in a bar. Being honest neither of those seem like gr8 options. there has to be something more suitable out there... PLZ anyone who can help it would be gr8ly appriciated. Especially if you happen to be in a similar situation in terms of ftm partner. I haven't ever met another woman who is partners with an ftm transsexual. Thanks all! Xxxx


----------



## BeckyB2011

Hi guys,

last time i posted here was about 8 months ago when I had my first IUI.  Unfortunately that turned out to be a BFN along with the 3 after that.  I am now in my first egg share IVF/ICSI cycle and in the tww which is driving me mad, a feeling i am sure that you are all too familiar with.  I had 1 4bb blastocyst transferred 5 days ago but have not been able to feel remotely positive about the possibly of being pregnant.  I keep telling myself that I have a good chance but pessimism kicks straight back in - mainly because I only had 1 blast to transfer and none to freeze.  Anyway I did an early test today which was negative.  Anyone get a BFN this early and then get a BFP later? 

Becs


----------



## K8L

Hi Becs

Congrats for getting this far in your journey.  Don't worry at all about the BFN.  It's way too early to test and there are loads of examples of that all over this site and the internet.  I know because I am also in my first 2ww after an ET (ICSI using my partners eggs) on the same day as you and I am really tempted to test and have spent most of the afternoon surfing the web for good reasons to do just that!! I've resisted so far.  It's an absolute killer isn't it!?  But seriously don't worry about it.

Sending you lots and lots of positive vibes.

Kx


----------



## welshginge

Hi ladies & gents. Pop onto the threads for more specific chat. There are defo people in all of your situations on this board! x


----------



## BeckyB2011

Thanks K,

the wait is a killer but I think I got my period today (5 days before test date).  Clinic said it could be late implantation and to up the cyclogest dose but it seems and feels very much like a normal period to me.  Anyway, i suppose that there is still a glimmer of hope so i'll cross my fingers and hold onto it untill saturday 

Very best of luck with your cycle 

becs


----------



## K8L

Thanks Becs - I have all my fingers and toes crossed for you for Saturday. Kx


----------



## SnoopyDance

Hi everyone, 

This is my first post on the boards here but I've been lurking and reading for a good few months now and thought I should introduce myself. I'm 28 (soon to be 29) and coming (very, very slowly) towards the end of a 2WW following a second try at medicated DIUI at a lovely clinic. I'm trying to stay positive and not test early so I'm surfing the web to try and distract myself. I'm scheduled for a blood test on 4 Oct so I'm just hoping for that BFP  

I have a great DP, we've been together for nearly 10 years and CPs for nearly 4. We've been thinking about starting a family for a while but really started in earnest at the beginning of the year. I've had one cycle of medicated DIUI with only 1 measly follicle which ended in a BFN. Thank goodness for my lovely DP because I was much more upset by that BFN than I thought I would be   . To be honest, I think I let the symptoms from the medication convince me that it had worked when it obviously hadn't. 

Well that's me. Good luck to everyone hoping for a BFP this month


----------



## Candy76

Welcome ScoopyDance! All the best of luck for you over the next days!
Yes, the drugs are evil. Once your boobs are growing you think its a sign of pregnancy, but its actually just the drugs


----------



## flipper123

Hi everyone, my first post here! My partner has had treatment over the past few years with no success. Our last frozen ET was in July, we were pregnant for a short time but sadly it didn't last. We have 6 embryos still in storage and are planning another frozen ET in January so fingers crossed. We were thinking about immune testing but have decided to try once more

Hope everyone is well x


----------



## Tabletop

Hi!  We just got married when I found these boards!!!

My gorgeous husband is trans so we're looking at fertility treatment/ insemination (are they the same thing?) within the next year.  

As you can tell I am pretty clueless about the process.  I've had all of my tests and all is fine, all we need is to find a clinic.  We're fairly sure we're going to go overseas as my husband isn't entirely comfortable with the laws in the UK.

Any advice on who we should approach would be muchly appreciated xxx


----------



## danibee2k

Hi all,

Been a lurker for a while but thought I'd say hi! My DP and I have just started TTC, she had her first IUI go today so in the 2ww time now.  I think I'm more nervous than she is, not really sure what I can do to help, feel a bit of a spare part but so excited! 
fingers crossed!!

Dani x


----------



## Tara1984

Hi everyone,

I too have been a lurker for a while and posted a few times but thought it was time to say hello properly    DP and I are just beginning our TTC journey and have just been referred to Barts and the London for our IUI treatment.

Feeling scared, confused, baffled and pretty darn excited all at the same time!

Good luck to all starting out on their journey and those who have been trying for a while - sending love and luck to you all      

Tara x


----------



## johno21

Hi ladies,

Just wanted to welcome you, hope all goes well for you. Theres lots of friendly peeps on here and im sure if there is anything you need to know, someone will know it. Think positive thoughts and believe it will happen for you. We are still in shock but are proof that dreams come true  

Sending lots of      to you all

x Jane & Lisa


----------



## Tryingtohelp

Hello,
What a fantastic site to fall apon. My Partner and i are going on our third TDI and what an emotional ride it has been. Like most, we thought the first time would have worked without question....that didnt happen. So here we go again. Last month we missed her "surge". We think that was due to the fertility drugs she started. This month we are testing every day to be sure. 

Let's say the fertility drugs have given me a Whole New Partner. Please god... let it taks this month. Hahaha!


----------



## mooie363

Hi, myself and my partner Lisa are thinking of adding to our family....we have our little girl from my previous relationship who is 3 in January   I will be carrying the baby... i am just looking for any advice etc at the moment, we live in Worcestershire does any one know their policy on offer same sex couples  treatment? 
Thank you all in advance and cant wait to start our journey 

Siobhan xx


----------



## Mama+Mummy

A big hello to all those who have recently joined us! Its an amazing place here with wonderful support and advice 
Good luck to everyone on your journey 
Xx


----------



## LisaAndLaura

mooie363 said:


> Hi, myself and my partner Lisa are thinking of adding to our family....we have our little girl from my previous relationship who is 3 in January  I will be carrying the baby... i am just looking for any advice etc at the moment, we live in Worcestershire does any one know their policy on offer same sex couples treatment?
> Thank you all in advance and cant wait to start our journey
> 
> Siobhan xx


Hi Siobhan, and welcome. I can't answer your question with regard to Worcestershire, but wondered if treatment is your only option. Apologies if I've missed something, but have you considered AI at home with a known donor? We were lucky to conceive that way on our second try. We wouldn't have been eligible for NHS treatment as we already have children from my previous relationship, and private treatment would not have been possible financially. There's lots of experience across the site, so I'm sure you'll get the answers you need.

Good luck, whichever path you take.

Lisa xx


----------



## PGD

Hello,
My wife and I are looking to start a family and I don't really know where to start. We have been to the LWC, met several potential donors, read everything stonewall have to offer but we are no closer to making a decision on how we are going to do this.
None of our friends are starting families at the moment and our GP was no help at all. 
We would really like any advice you have on how you got pregnant and why you chose that particular method of conception. We would really like to hear from someone who has a great gay friendly GP and any good experiences anyone has had with a clinic. Also anything you wish someone had mentioned to you when you got started.
Thank you for any help you can offer
Chloe and Emma xx


----------



## welshginge

Hey Guys! We choose anon donor as we wanted to be our child's parents & no-one else which seems selfish but I'm being honest. We also wanted to be protected legally & our son to have the option of contacting donor/half siblings when he's 18 if he wants to (which I hope the donor will be expecting due to how he donated). Me & DW wanted her to be the other parent & not feel undermined in anyway by Seth knowing his Dad, does that make sense? Anyway we thought a few IUI's would suffice but alas we moved onto IVF & now have our beautiful boy (with some sibling sperm on ice for the future). 

Make sure you get onto the other threads too. Welcome!


----------



## johno21

Hello ladies and welcome,

Just to say that we went through a clinic for the same reasons as Welshginge outlined. Only difference is ours was DIUI that thankfully worked first time, we opted to use an american site calledd xytex for our Donor simply because we felt we got a lot more information and background ie health and family health background than you do from Donors in good old England, we too have some sibling sperm left in the freezer . The clinic we used were fantastic and the process of paperwork made the legalities of parent 1 and parent 2 very simple for us.

Good luck with whichever route you decide is best for you


----------



## Freethinker

Hi there, I'm a newbie here and me and my partner have our first appointment at the Assisted Conception Service today so we are a bit nervous but hope things go well but the other thing that's a concern is trying to find a donor at the last minute as 2 people have just let us down which we are gutted about and so now we don't know what to do next so any advice would be great thanks. 

Andrea


----------



## PGD

Thank you for you replies and support.
I signed up to the american sperm bank last night and had a good browse there does seem to be a good choice. 
Good luck to everyone and I will let you know how we get on.
Chloe x


----------



## overDAbridge

Hi ya, 

My name is Bridge and I've just had our 18th round of tx - IVF - unsuccessful. 

Really not sure where to turn to now. 

My DW is taking drugs for a FET but Im finding it difficult to get my head around the fact I may no longer be able to have children myself - the FET is my egg but it wasnt a good quality when we froze it so Im not too hopeful with the outcome. 

My hormones r stuffed and if this latest round doesnt work - thats me finished with biolgical children of my own. I feel logically this shouldnt bother me but emotionally I'm alover the place about it. 

Any one else had any mixed up feelings about his or is it just me?

Bridge x


----------



## welshginge

Bridge - I'm so sorry. It most denfinately isn't just you. When I became pregnant my partner had a grieving period for the child she'll never have (she didn't want to do tx) & it was hard. It now doesn't bother her as she loves our boy so much but she does think about it still, just less emotional these days. Best of luck. x


----------



## jessica60

Bridge, so sorry to hear that you are feeling so down. I would never have imagined when I was in my teens and twentys how hard this would be. I also would not have imagined how emotional the feelings we have of wanting a child are. Hope you are feeling a bit better today about things. Xx


----------



## becs0112

Evening Everyone, My GF and I are looking into the possibility of having a baby using an egg sharing scheme through the Darlington branch of the london womens clinic, we have lived together for almost four years and think its time to start a family. She has PCOS so it may be difficult to concieve as she wants to carry the baby. We are literally at the first stage of the process and I would like to know if anyones been through or is going through the same process as we really dont know what to expect, 

any help or advice will be gratefully received, 
becs&lins
xx


----------



## Estcherry

Hi everyone,

I'm Esther, my wife is called Bev.  We had our first unstimulated IUI today at 9am! Very excited.  Currently with IVF scotland and so far so good.

Any tips for maximising sucess after IUI, also any signs I should look out for?  Already feel pregnant but I know that's just wishful thinking!

Thanks

E


----------



## Chopio

Hi

I'm a 34 year old femme from London. My partner and I are starting IUI in the new year. I've had all the investigations and now we are just waiting until I've got some stressful work exams out of the way in January before making a start.

Feeling a bit narked at how medicalised the process has been so far but apart from that I'm just super excited!

Looking forward to getting to know you all better

Sx


----------



## dingle123

Just wanted to say howdy - we are starting this month (Lister) and are very, very excited! I'm 32 my Wife of almost 4 years is 38. LJ xx


----------



## babynumber

Hi 

Is there a BFP thread on here for folks using donor sperm/AI with known donors at home?

I cant seem to find one :/


----------



## Mish3434

Babynumber, There is a LBGT Pregnancy Thread, but it covers all aspects of conceiving methods

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=244869.msg4804886#new

and over in the Donor Section is this one

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=275245.msg0#new

There is a general one in the Over 40's area too

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=267773.msg4808034#new

Good luck with your TX  

Shelley xx


----------



## babynumber

thank you shelley!  xxx


----------



## JosieLil

Just wanted to say hi!

My g/f and I have been together 15 years and after talking about it forever have finally started down the IVF process. Been injecting since just before Xmas and I'm hoping to have EC early next week and obviously ET a few days later  

Feeling V excited but unbelievably nervous at the moment!!!

Good luck to everyone embarking on this crazy journey!


----------



## welshginge

Welcome! Join us on the other threads!


----------



## Bocksey

Hi everyone, 

Me and my wife are in the treatment stage of intra partner egg sharing. Becs, we are with the Darlington LWC and have found them to be very accommodating and the nurses make us feel at ease. Today for the first time my wife has given me 2 injections instead of the usual one I've been on. I feel like a pin cushion, but I know it'll be worth it in the end  

Good luck everyone! X


----------



## Candy76

Hi Bocksey, welcome and good luck on your journey.
I don't like the injections. Often I have a couple of goes with the needle stopping right that moment it touches the skin, just by magic.


----------



## Bocksey

That's exactly why I don't do it to myself, I don't think I could do it or it would take several attempts! It helps that my wife is a nurse (in mental health but she still has some experience of injecting)! Thanks for your good luck wishes. The same to you   x


----------



## lauramax23

Hi Everyone,
Me and my partner have been together 7 years, married for 16 months and started going to LWC Cardiff in March last year. My partner was going to donate to me and an anonymous recipient in september but cycle cancelled due to very little response to drugs and only 3 decent size follicles. She now needs letz procedure so I am having IVF, my AMH result was 4.0 so we were devasted but went ahead anyway and somehow managed to produce lots of follicles and had 21 eggs retrieved yesterday and found out today 10 have fertilised. I came on here to see what numbers other people have had, hoping I can have blastocyst embryo transfer monday.
It's such a stressful time but hopefully it will all be worth it in the end!!


----------



## welshginge

Sounds good to me. I had 8 eggs (I think) or maybe 9 but 8 were mature. I have 1 ovary but a decent AMH considering so 10 fertilising is a fantastic number. Best of luck!


----------



## welshginge

Join the other threads if you haven't already.


----------



## M2M

dawnygen said:


> Hi guys, been looking on this site and others for a while getting tips and watching how supportive and kind people are to each other, it is so nice to have a place to come where people understand how your feeling! My wife and I have been going through the process of checks and blood tests and doctors visits etc etc etc... We have had 3 failed iui.... Lots of follicles quite big even but no joy. We have been bac to the hospital this week and paid £120 for a consultation...we got to find out lots of info and got my amh results (14.5) and we were told to go ahead with icis. The doctor was nice but very short with us regarding funding. "there is no money for same sex couples " regardless of the fact I have a fertility issue and we have failed iui. We felt so upset that it is so cut and dry with the doctors, I got home and spoke to my local pct and to cut a very long story short our lovely doctor is helping us to apply for an exceptional case with the pct. Fingers and toes x has any one else been down this route?? And how long might it take to get an answer
> Wow I didn't mean to write so much on my first Post
> X x


Welcome to FF and ahh how familiar your story sounds!  We were also told "you won't get funding" by our GP so we decided to pay for a full cycle of IVF for ourselves (£5,000). Fortunately we had savings and were able to afford to do so at the time, though if we hadn't been able to, we would've been heartbroken. Our clinic has a long waiting list for IUI with donor sperm and I am not a great candidate for it anyway, so we went straight for IVF. Had one failed fresh cycle, then two frozen cycles with remaining embryos at £1,000 each... neither of those resulted in a lasting pregnancy so we then saw our IVF consultant who said he'd help us apply for funding.

He wrote a nice letter to the PCT and we were approved for two full cycles of IVF. Now I don't know if things have just changed in the couple of years since we started, or if our GP was just giving us incorrect information. Either way it's worth fighting! It took us four months from our IVF consultant writing the letter to the PCT, to us being approved for funding. We had to go to the "exceptional treatment panel" (still thought this was a bit discriminatory as hetero couples don't have to!) but we got there in the end - just took longer for us to get funding than it usually does for hetero couples but we got it.  Good luck - it's good that you've got a nice doctor on your side - don't give up without a fight!


----------



## welshginge

Welcome back M2M! xx


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## M2M

welshginge said:


> Welcome back M2M! xx


Thank you.  Good to be back! Baby Ginge is gorrrrrrrrgeous. xxx


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## dawnyx

Thanks M2M for your reply, it's nice to here someone actually got some funding through this process. Trying not to get to stressed out waiting. I hope it is sooner than 4 months tho  . So ready to be getting on with our treatment now as it's probably been 2 yrs since our first visit to the hospital. We have got a nurses info session in 4 wks time so it would be great to have good news for that app. 
Thanks again take care x x



M2M said:


> Welcome to FF and ahh how familiar your story sounds!  We were also told "you won't get funding" by our GP so we decided to pay for a full cycle of IVF for ourselves (£5,000). Fortunately we had savings and were able to afford to do so at the time, though if we hadn't been able to, we would've been heartbroken. Our clinic has a long waiting list for IUI with donor sperm and I am not a great candidate for it anyway, so we went straight for IVF. Had one failed fresh cycle, then two frozen cycles with remaining embryos at £1,000 each... neither of those resulted in a lasting pregnancy so we then saw our IVF consultant who said he'd help us apply for funding.
> 
> He wrote a nice letter to the PCT and we were approved for two full cycles of IVF. Now I don't know if things have just changed in the couple of years since we started, or if our GP was just giving us incorrect information. Either way it's worth fighting! It took us four months from our IVF consultant writing the letter to the PCT, to us being approved for funding. We had to go to the "exceptional treatment panel" (still thought this was a bit discriminatory as hetero couples don't have to!) but we got there in the end - just took longer for us to get funding than it usually does for hetero couples but we got it.  Good luck - it's good that you've got a nice doctor on your side - don't give up without a fight!


just amended to put the quote as a quote


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## Hales :)

Lovely to have you back M2M! Well done on the funding! When are you hoping to go again? 

DawnyGen - Good luck with the funding


----------



## dawnyx

Thank Hales, Calling the doctor tomorrow to see if he has my paper work sorted... 
gota keep them on there toes lol


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## M2M

Hales :) said:


> Lovely to have you back M2M! Well done on the funding! When are you hoping to go again?


Good to be back!  How are you, the missus and your boys? The IVF is on hold for us until I'm discharged from endocrinology... currently being investigated for adrenal deficiency. Meh!


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## Hales :)

What a pain! I'm presuming that this needs to be sorted prior to IVF? I don't know what the impact is? We are all ok thanks - very busy but great.  Back on the rollercoaster that is tx - so fingers crossed (aren't they always?!)


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## M2M

Yeah my endocrinologist doesn't want me to do any more IVF until I have an official diagnosis and have started on my medication (hydrocortisone - steroid replacement therapy). It's a right pain - I've been seeing him since the summer! Just had a fourth test last week though so hopefully this will be the one that allows them to diagnose me properly... fingers crossed! Some of the tests have been weird. One of them involved being forced to eat a massive bowl of cereal, three slices of toast and jam, a bottle of lucozade, a cup of sugary tea and a carton of orange juice REALLY quickly, in front of a nurse!    Low cortisol can affect fertility so I guess it's sensible to wait until it's all sorted...

Very exciting that you're starting again, woop! Your signature is meant to say 15/01/12, I'm guessing?    How are you finding it so far?


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## Hales :)

Ha! Will change it, it is supposed to say 15/1/12 indeed! Feeling awful so far, amazing when the shoe is on the other foot how much harder it is  Hoping EC is going to be Wednesday, but have a scan today so will no more.

Hope you get yourself sorted - My mom has to see an endocrinologist regularly as she has been on steroids since she was tiny due to severe asthma which has stopped her producing any natural hydrocortisone, I know if she doesn't take enough steroids she feels awful, so know it is not much fun! Hope they get you sorted soon  xx


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## PRobertson

Hi everyone,

We are new on here, Phoebe and Jen.

Not sure what to say or where to start. We have been together for 4.1/2 years, civil partnership for 2. We are really wanting a child and feel a little alone in the matter with not much knowledge or help really. 

We are looking for a sperm donor but it turns out that is really hard for some reason, and doing AI. 

Hope we fit in here as it seems such a lovely community from what we've seen


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## welshginge

Welcome, join us on the other threads & start chatting. Lots of experience with AI on these boards so I'm sure your q's can be answered.


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## M2M

Welcome, Phoebe and Jen.    This is a great place and you are amongst friends here. I've been on here for almost 2 and a half years now        and have met some lifelong friends.

You're right, when you consider how much sperm is so easily wasted (  ) it's amazing how difficult it is for us to source it!

Good luck to you both. If you have any questions, there are loads of people here willing to help!


----------



## laurac1988

Hi Phoebe and Jen!

Welcome! Am in the same situation as you as are many others so I'm sure you will find any advice you need xxx


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## maisy1

Hi Phoebe and Jen,
welcome  
It can be difficult starting out. I am doing AI with a known donor and a few months ago was in your situation. In fact I am amazed at how quickly my situation moved forward. If you have any questions feel free to ask ... pm me if you want. good luck x


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## Polar

Hello there. I've been looking through the board and wow! how interesting. Although I seem to get the feeling I'm the only single lesbian out there going through this? surely that isn't the case. I had my ET on Saturday and due to test on 10th March. I'll be interested in chatting to any other singletons that are having treatment or indeed are now mums. 

Thanks

Polar


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## M2M

You are definitely not the only single lesbian on here!  I can think of a couple of them off the top of my head... *southern_angel* is a single mum to a little boy and I believe *midnightaction* is also a single lesbian mum of twin girls.  They won't be the only ones either! I think *JJ1* is another one but she was TTC and I think is taking a break for now.

Check out the "Single Women" section here: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=403.0 - I know there are quite a few single mums and single ladies TTC on there, and some of them just happen to be lesbians too!
You're definitely not alone.  Welcome to FF and GOOD LUCK for your test date!


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## Guest

Hi,
I'm brand new to the site and this whole journey. I'm 32, gay and single. Like some of the other posters I never really thought about when and how I would have a family, I just presumed it would eventuate along the way, as I was so keen to have a big crowd of kids. As I got older, and started to identify as gay, I still figured I'd just meet someone and together we'd decide to go down the route of having kids, one way or another. But it hasn't really worked out like that and as I live overseas, currently in a fairly remote area for my work, I've got to 32 and haven't met anyone yet. 

I'm adopted, and the desire to have a child that's mine by blood, is pretty overwhelming. So after a lot of thought, and discussions with a counsellor I decided to try and become pregnant through donor conception. I don't feel like I have to be partnered to be a good parent (though it'd be great to meet someone down the track), especially as I have 12 brilliant siblings and, through various marriages, 5 'parents'. This kid's going to have plenty of love! No-one in the family has any experience of this avenue before, and some will find it a challenge to get their heads round. But then again the gay thing was a big deal to start with but they got past that on the whole  I've only talked about it with my closest sister who is great about it. At the moment I'm hoping to find support and encouragement on these excellent boards, and also a lot of info, because there's so much to learn and it's daunting to say the least.

My situation is complicated (in a useful way I guess!) by the fact i have dual nationality and can have treatment in Australia, where I live, or the UK where I'm from. I still haven't really got a handle on which would be best/ most possible. Any advice would be most appreciated. At the moment I don't live near a city and won't for at least 6 months, so I'm going a bit loopy not even being able to get any preliminary appointments or start the ball rolling.

So that's me, and I look forward to hearing any advice from others and sharing your experiences.
Thanks

Arran Boat Song


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## M2M

A warm welcome to you as well, Arran Boat Song.    It's good to have so many new faces around here and I'm sure you'll find the support you're looking for!

Have you ever had any fertility tests? That may be the best starting point for you - getting the basic fertility tests to get an idea of whether you ovulate normally, what your ovarian reserve is like, and various other fertility hormones. Your GP (or the Australian equivalent!) should be able to do those tests for you. That should give you a rough good idea of how likely it is that you'd succeed in trying donor insemination. Then of course you'd need to make the decision regarding whether to "do it yourself" using donor sperm from a friend or other known donor, or to go to a clinic - there are pros and cons of both! Obviously if it turns out you do have fertility issues, your choices may be different.

Most of all, good luck!    I think you'll find a lot of the single ladies on here are or have been in exactly the same boat as you.


----------



## Guest

Thanks M2M. I'm so new to the whole thing I wasn't exactly sure if you could go and get tests for fertility from a GP, or if it was more complicated than that. All the other abbreviations and treatments confused me as to exactly where to start! But going to the GP is a manageable starting point   Basically I just want to get going as soon reasonably possible after I finish my current work contract, so any preparations I can do in advance will help I'm sure. Especially as, as you say I have no idea what my fertility will be like. I am already decided that I want to go through an anonymous donor through a clinic, so it'll all be about how and when. And where. (Not much to figure out then!) Fingers crossed. Good to have lots of supportive people on here! Cheers.


----------



## Polar

Hi Arran 
So I'm single, 40 and had my ET on Saturday and now doing the 2week wait. My GP did all my bloods apart from Amh levels which saved some money. I started the process in July so ts taken a while to get here - 2 cycles cancelled before EC because of high risk of OHSS. So go get started. I am at LWC london and have found them to be helpful and good - although you do have to make a bit of noise if you feel like you are being treated like a number - which i did on the 2nd cycle so a quick complaint and they have tripped over themselves to look after me since then. I did anon. donor. Feel free to chat.

Px


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## dawnyx

Hi Ladies,
not been on for a while been waiting for the PCT to get back to us... Bloody gutted, we got a no yesterday   
Our practice manager is so angry. she has pushed the decision as much as she can as the only criteria we dont fit is that we cant try to conceive naturally for 2 yrs!!!!!!!! not very PC of them aye (They even admitted off the record it is because we are a same sex couple). Apparently there is some new criteria coming out in march for same sex couples if any one isn't aware get in touch with Ur PCT to find out what it is,.
Any way not going lying down and we are appealing   and going to ring fertility solicitors for advice tomorrow! any one got funding through appealling?
I do wonder if we should just give up, I don't know how much I can take when I'm supposed to be relaxed! It just seems so unfair and who fights if we all give up, lol a bit deep 

welshginge the natal hypnotherapy is fab...

Arran I lived in oz for a while and there health care was amazing, I would look into it whilst your there all be it you do have to pay even just to see a doctor in Australia and you don't in the UK. Good luck


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## Candy76

Welcome Arran, sounds like you had a lot of advise here already. I can certainly identify with your journey. A lot of decisions to be made - e.i. which country to live in, to have treatment in etc...

Dawn, how about you are trying with a known donor? This surely should be equivalent to ttc naturally. Appealing can't harm, if you don't spend £££ on a solicitor. Has your PCT any rules about heterosexual couples where the man has no sperm? How many failed IUI's would they need to have gone through in order to qualify for IVF?


----------



## dawnyx

Hi candy,
We are using an in unknown doner for the treatment. Not sure about the pct regulations regarding the male not having sperm but I have just been down to the docs and I mentioned that to the practice manager and she said she had put that to them, they wanted to know gens fertility and if she is fertile y can't she carry. We are still waiting for them to send in writing y we have been refused but she reckons they will be getting legal advice before they reply!!!!
There is no criteria about how many iuis r classed as enough To move on to ivf, this us what is doing my head in cause how can u fight if u don't fit into a box . Hopefully the new criteria next month will help.
Thanks for replying, going to get some legal advice later so fingers x


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## HopefulPony

I'm new to FF and just wanted to say hello  I'm Cat and I'm 25, my wife is 26 and we've been together for 6 years. We're starting to look into fertility treatment now, as we want to start ttc as soon as possible! We'd like to have IUI (me carrying if possible) with an unknown donor. Our first step is to start saving for the treatment, and to lose some weight - I can't carry too much weight on my hips due to arthritis. Hopefully in a year or so I'll be down to my goal weight and we'll have enough funds to start treatment, we're very excited! I'm so pleased I found this community as wife and I have so many questions! 

Cat xxx


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## dawnyx

Hi both, good luck on the start of ur journey. It's all very exciting for u and u will learn so much by talking to people on here and talking to ur doctor. It is so different for each couple but there is so much help on ff off people who understand what ur going through. We went to the Doc's quite a while before we started treatment for basic fertility blood tests and they referred us to the hospital to see the consultantant and to have more blood tests. We got married and honey mooned before we started treatment but it felt good to have done something !!


----------



## Candy76

Welcome Cath! This is the coolest ticker!

Dawn, sounds like your consultant is on the case. Did you ever get DW's fertility checked out?


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## dawnyx

Hi candy, we haven't had DW fertility checked as it's never really been an option for us as we both want me to carry. My amh is 14.5 so hopefully with ivf i will have beta chance of BFP!!!
If u could c her after an episode of one born every minute u would understand lol ... She reckons that programme has put her off for Gud  
Howz ur treatment going?? X


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## Candy76

Yes, I know exactly what you mean with your DW. I never thought I would have my own kid. All the other options fell like dominoes over the years and here I am.
I tried to meet women who already had a kid, but I never got on with the woman - kid fantastic!   Then I thought adoption, but it seems more difficult than first thought. Next was for DW to carry, but she is pre-menopausal.

I am now on the pill hoping everthing goes right to have treatment next cycle.
Last time I got pregnant I was a nervous wreck. I think / hope this was intuition knowing something was wrong rather than me freaking out about being pregnant (plus my job got cut at the same time). Hopefully there is a next time and it will all be fine then


----------



## dawnyx

Wow sounds like a quite a journey but as they say everything happens for a reason U have met ur wife and U have a good AMH level so fingers xxxx!!!
I am going to be on a long protocol when we start treatment, Is the pill for that Sorry I'm a bit naive when it comes to ivf.
I really wish now we had gone straight for ivf instead of doing 3 rounds of iui first seems like a lot of heart ache for nothing.They didnt offer me a AMH test until after the 3 failed rounds (gutted)

I'm sure there Will be a next time candy, keep positive  chick 
Did u try acupuncture before u started ur treatment??
Have a good wk end


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## bonnie982

Hello, I'm 34 and have been with my wife Hayley for 3 years.  We decided to tic after our civil partnership last year. I already have a 10 year old daughter so after visiting our gp who was brilliant tbh we were transfered over to the hospital where we were told very rudely that we weren't entitled to any HHS funding for treatment because I already have a child even though it will be Hayley carrying not me.  We looked into various options and finally decided to give us the best chance we would go for ivf with an unknown donor.  We are currently having treatmeand at crm London and we have gone down the egg sharing route as it drastically reduces the cost for us.  Hopefully we will be successful  we both find it so helpful reading other people's experiences and are so glad we came across this site


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## Jcg1973

HI.  I'm a newbie to everything really.  I've never used a chat forum like this and I'm new to starting the process of IUI.  I wanted to chat to people in a similar situation as I, in the sense that they are gay and mums to be, or mums already, or single mums.  I've always wanted to be a mum and with the age concern, I need to do it now rather than later.  I've no issues bringing up the child alone, yes, I'm really really scared, but having a child is something I've thought long and hard about.  I do worry that this child is going to be brought up by a gay mum who may or may not be in a relationship.  Those of you out there, who are experiencing being a mum or mums please could you offer me some comforting advice about being a gay mum and how you feel this affects your child.  I really hope I've posted this on the right wall?  Many thanks to those who respond.


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## Polar

Juliette - just go for it. I'm 40 and single (gay) and thought I would just go for it, roll the dice and what will be, will be. I went through IVF and am now in the 2 week wait and I test next Saturday and then I know what to do next. Until then, I'll just keep trying to keep sane. I have spent so many hours weighing up the what if's - but the only thing I know is that I would love the child and be open about everything and take each situation as it arose. There will be times when I think that it may not be a bed of roses, but what's the worst that can happen, I'm hoping that with every year that passes the world becomes more accepting and familiar with gay families, single or otherwise. 

Good luck with it all

Px


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## Glitterintheair

I think we all have something in common - we all want to be a mum so hopefully us being gay won't make any difference and our babies will love us even more. You guys give me lots of hope xxx


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## dawnyx

Nurses info ivf session tomorrow, Yay feel like we are finally moving forward! 
Hope everyone is doing ok?!!!  x


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## halsall73

Hi All

Our names are Edd & Chris, we are a gay couple and have been together for 15yrs and civil partners for 4 years. I'm(Edd) 39 in August and Chris is 34 in November. We are wanting to know how we start the journey of becoming parents. We would be looking to do a straight surrogacy. We are a very loving couple and ache to be parents. 
Any advice would be great. 

Thanks

Edd & Chris


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## welshginge

Welcome! So nice to have some boys around! Well we can all certainly relate to the ache to become parents, best of luck to you & join us on the other threads (if you haven't already)x


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## dawnyx

Hi, Has any one had a problem with doner sperm counts?? Sounds strange I guess but we had our ivf nurses session last wk I remembered the doc saying the count was of medium quality so I asked the nurses what the counts were when we had the iui. The counts were pathetically low as they recommend no lower than 5 million for iui and they were lower than that for at least 1 round. I can't believe they carried on with the treament without telling us. Is this normal

I wish we had known/ thought to have asked the count before we paid out so much to the ESB  
Apparently ESB have offered 2 new vials in place of the ones we have got but we have got to pay postage, what a sham !!

Well thats my rant sorry it just seems so unfair they can let this happen!!


----------



## Candy76

Dawnygen, I suppose this shouldn't happen. But if it does, the sperm bank will replace the samples if they come with a guarantee. The clinic should certainly have pointed this out to you at the time. What seems weird is that they seem to have used 2 vials and they were both of poor quality. Generally they should defrost one, check the quality and if it's no good defrost another one (preferable from a different sample / date) and fill in a separate quality sheet for each of the vials so you can use this as evidence of poor quality.
Having to pay your own shipping fee for replacement vials seems standard. However, does the ESB supply your clinic regularly so you can piggyback onto someone else's order?


----------



## Candy76

Hi Dawnygen, We had treatment in 3 clinics and have had a few hick ups along the way. Last time we went to open evenings we made a point in talking to the embryologists as we figured out they do the magic - more so with IVF. Hope things get moving soon for you.


----------



## dawnyx

Thanks candy me too, we are so ready to go!!! Tk care x


----------



## sibbnchaz29

Hey everyone.
I am a newbie to this lol. just joined yesterday.


----------



## Curlymix

Hello - I am a newbie too! Well kind of I suffered an eptopic so disappeared for a while now am on my first IVF cycle... Been told my lining is too thick - has anyone else ever been told that?


----------



## sibbnchaz29

Hey Curlymix, aww so sorry to hear that, it must have been a very hard time for you.
have you been for your ivf treatment yet? 
my partner and I have just been through our implications counseling so have all this to look towards lol.


----------



## freckles2702

Hi,

I'm new!  

In f/f relationship and really wanting to start a family together. I've got bilateral hydrosalpinges with adhesions. Really struggling with the process (Have posted about this) 

Nice to meet you all  x


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## lizbdawnp

Hello,

Me and my partner have been together for 8 years, having a civil partnership 6th October 2012. Only just starting, what i think will be a long process. Managed to get basic blood test done via our GP and she has referred me on for an appointment within the NHS. She was not sure about what else she could offer us, so felt it best for us to see a specialist. The consultant we have been booked in to see is thankfully the director of the private/nhs fertility centre we have chosen to go with. So fingers crossed things might run smoothly  Doctor has adviced me to get my bmi in to a healthy range, so am trying my best to do that by the time we see the consultant. 

we have been reading these post for a while now and find them really helpful. Look forward to getting to know you all.


----------



## halsall73

Hi All

We are so happy to say tha we have found a surro angel  and are now getting to know them with the hope of starting later in the year.
We are so lucky to of found this wonderful couple.

Fingers crossed for a birth next year. 

Edd & Chris.xx


----------



## welshginge

Congratulations! Hope it all works out for you xxx


----------



## Texas

Hello!

Just thought I'd stop lurking and introduce myself. My partner and I are scheduled to begin IVF in April/May. We're very happy to have found you lot!

Best,
Tex


----------



## vikkat

Hi, i have just joined this site as my wife and I and currently looking for a donor for AI.  We looked into clinics etc and just havnt got the money right now so wanted to try at home if possible.  I can already see there are many positive stories out there so need to keep upbeat.  Hopefully hear all about it in the future.


----------



## kamelahee33

Newbie as of this morning! And all I can say is awesome! Love all the positive feedback and support everyone provides to one another. We are in the very beginning stages. But excited to get started. Learning all the lingo and finding out where to go. So much fun to plan a family. Best of luck to all!


----------



## Candy76

Welcome Texas, Vikkat and Kamelahee and best of luck for your journey!


----------



## faiith

Hi 

I’m a single lesbian about to start my first cycle of IVF on short protocol. Will be starting my cycle around the 14th may and taking menopur 150iu daily from CD2 and Centrotide 0.25mg daily from CD5. I’d really love to hear from anyone in a similar situation to myself and anyone who’s had/having the same drugs as myself. Any general advice would be greatly appreciated   

Good luck on your own journey


----------



## Candy76

Welcome faiith!

I had those drugs recently. In my clinic they called it antagonist cycle. The good thing about it is you don't downregulate and therefore take less drugs. When it comes to Centrotide, I had a 2inch itchy area around the needle entry point for maybe an hour afterwards. I think this is common, but try not to itch.

Good luck with your cycle!


----------



## emmalouise77

Hi,

Not exactly new here but realised I'd never posted on this topic. My wife and I were lucky enough to be successful at first attempt at IVF and baby Drew was born 8 weeks ago. I had treatment at LWC Cardiff/Swansea using donor sperm  and I egg shared.

Wishing everyone good luck with their attempts.


----------



## Charlie &#039;N&#039; Bec

Welocme ellie 

xx


----------



## oddie

Hi, new to the forum (but been reading for a good while)

About me.... I am 28, partner 27, TTC for 10 months now.

Hope to get to know you all


----------



## rasl

Hello everyone, 

Completely new here and looking for advice... My wife (45) and I (31) are hoping to conceive a child this year (I would carry) with a known donor through DIY AI, but are looking for advice on the best process to follow in terms of std checks (for the kd), fertility tests (for me) and the actual physical AI (for all of us). Anyone out there with experience and knowledge they could impart?

Thank you!

R


----------



## Gemandfi

Hello all, I'm gemma and am currently starting Ivf and p2p egg sharing and donation.

Any advise will be greatly received as stressed it not the word at the moment!!

I'm going to carry and my wife is donating, I'm finding this all very scary at the moment 

Xx


----------



## bumble2508

hi Ladies,

i fell like a bit of an introder on here but i think you guys may be able to help me if you are willing 

me and hubby have been trying for a baby for 3 years now and to no avail iam 23 and he is 28 he is all fine but i have PCOS.
we were told i have to wait until iam 30 until i can get any sort of help with IVF IUI etc.
hubby has been talking about AI at home as he has read up on it and thinks its worth a try.
iam realy in two minds about the whole thing.
i have read up on some of it and it all seems very clinical and unnatural which i guess are my biggest hang ups.
i have read a few posts on here and it seems a few of you ladies have tried it and some had sucsess.
i was woundering if anyone had any advice for me or info or anything realy, i so want a baby but i have hit a real stumbling block.
i guess i just need to get over myself but its hard without all the info i guess.

thank you in advance and again iam sorry for intruding.

i wish you ladies all the luck in the world x x x x 
x x x x


----------



## dingle123

Hi Bumble,

You are more than welcome here! We are a f/f couple but I post mostly on the egg sharing section as this section can be quite quiet. Don't get despondent if you don't get a response straight away  

Lots of couples have been successful with AI so hope you get the advice you need....

Lots of luck to you and your hubby! Xx


----------



## bumble2508

Dingle123 
thank u for your reply 
Thats ok I dnt mind waiting I know sum posts take longer to get a reply then others.
Iam just greatful for any type of responce as I know u guys are all busy ladies to
Thanks again and I hope all goes well for u and u get ur bubba soon
X x x x


----------



## dingle123

Thanks Lovely! I see from your sig you are on metformin? My dp was recently diagnosed with type diabetes and she is suffering with horrible side effects from the metformin?

Have you looked at the donor sperm section? I realise you won't be using donor sperm but there are couples on there discussing AI so it may give you some ideas xx


----------



## bumble2508

hey hun

My dad takes metformin to as he is diabetic and gave me sum great advice.
is your dp on the top dosage ( 4 a day? ) my dad told me to take 1 tablet four times a day and take it in the middle of food so half way through a meal take a 2min break and have the tabldt with water then go back to eating. I have had no side affects except when I eat greay or fatty foods like mac donalds ocasionaly I get a tummy ach if I have fizzz drinks to but toch wood I have had nothing bad since sticking to my dads advice. Did you know they also perscribe another type of metformin that releases slower into your system for people who struggled to take the more common.one.
Sorry didnt men to blabber on lol

Thank you I hadn't even considered looking there I will.def pop.over there and have a look.
Thankyou for being so.helpful I greatly appreciate it x x x x


----------



## dingle123

Thank you for the info re: metformin - going to pass it onto my dp!


----------



## want2bemum

Hello,
I'm single bisexual woman and I want to be mum


----------



## tinki

Hi want2bemum  welcome! Are you having treatment or just getting started? Feel free to ask us all questions x


----------



## want2bemum

tinki said:


> Hi want2bemum  welcome! Are you having treatment or just getting started? Feel free to ask us all questions x


just getting started  
I'm looking for sperm donor


----------



## hubba_bubba

Hi there ladies, I'm unsure if I'm in the right place as this thread looks a bit quiet but here goes I will introduce myself! Me and my DP have started our IVF journey together, it has been a windy road but we are finally getting there! Initially we wanted to do a partner to partner egg share whereby I would be the carrier but it wasn't to be 😥 I have just started D/R and I am egg sharing at the LWC in Darlington.. Feeling so excited and nervous all at the same time and it is finally starting to feel real... Would love to hear some stories from other couples who have been through ivf.. Wishing you all the very best of luck xxxx


----------



## Candy76

Welcome Hubba! You are definitively in the right place. I have found this site very supportive. It can be a bit quiet, but people tend to reply to posts. Have a look around.
If you like it a bit more manic, you could try the cycle buddy thread. I found it quite fast moving, but it brings you together with people going through the same stage of treatment as you.

Good luck and glad you have found us!


----------



## hubba_bubba

Bless ya thanks for your reply candy! It's hard to know where to start, but I must say everyone seems so friendly and very supportive. Thanks so much I will def check out cycle buddies! X


----------



## welshginge

It is quiet on here these days. Quite a lot of us have babies now so are fairly busy & we also have a ******** group that get used regularly. It's a secret group so no-one knows your in it or that it even exists. If anyone would like to be added PM me your ******** name.


----------



## hubba_bubba

Awww congrats on the babies ladies! That's wonderful! I will PM you if you don't mind x


----------



## Pognut

Hi everyone,

We're just starting out TTC too - we're in Wales, and are doing the NHS clinic route. We've been referred by our GP, shd have our first consultation in October/November, and I had my first blood test yesterday. It's all starting to feel real, although TBH I hardly dare to feel that it is! Have wanted a child for ages but now the circumstances are right, finally. My partner's 42, I'm 34 and I'll be carrying. 

Does anyone on here know what kind of questions they ask in the first meeting? I'm worrying a bit - will the elderly, male consultant be homophobic? Will the fact that my partner and I have both had depression (I'm off meds now) count against us? I think I might be worrying too much, and it's probably just because we are finally getting somewhere!

Cheers,

Pognut


----------



## hubba_bubba

Hi there Pognut,


Firstly good luck for your cycle, it is an amazing feeling when the ball starts rolling!
Don't you worry about anything, our doctor is an oldish guy and he treated us perfectly well and I didn't feel uncomfortable in the slightest! I don't think being on medication will affect you either think you just need to relax! All the best to you both and if there's anything I can help with pm me (I might not be that good as this is our first cycle too) ;-) x


----------



## Sheshylou

Hello! Just thought I'd introduce myself, I've been on here before, a while ago, me and my then GF were going through our journey TTC, sadly relationship ended in 2010. Still looking for the girl of my dreams, but coming round to the idea of going it alone. I have 5 ice babies waiting me, but have struggled with the thought of using them alone, ever since my relationship split. It almost has felt like I've let them down. So for the past few years I have been trying to get my head in the right place and come to terms with the fact that some things just don't turn out as planned!! Lol. I have a very demanding job in the military, and so I guess you could say there never is a right time....but my desire to be a mother is growing stronger everyday. I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you, and hopefully to start my TTC journey next year. So there you go, that's me, looking forward to chatting to you all xx


----------



## hubba_bubba

Hello Michelle!

This is our first IVF currently on 2ww. 

I think it's fantastic that you are ready to go it alone and fulfil your dream of becoming a mummy!
You can do it alone, lots of people do. If I were in your situation I probably would too. It sounds like you have given it a lot of thought so I'd say go for it! 

Where did you have your treatment? Xx


----------



## Mogget

Hello  

My partner and I (well, my partner) had our first IUI treatment a couple of weeks ago, after waiting the best part of 2 years to finally get started.

Just wanted to say hi really...


----------



## ktw

Hey,
Brief history about us in my signature. Just started the ball rolling in requesting a referral to local hospital to start DI. If anyone can offer any advice etc i'd be really grateful - the information i have found from various websites is a little confusing to a newbie! Can anyone tell me approx timescales, what to expect etc? Thanks in advance xx


----------



## Mogget

OH and I had our first IUI treatment last month, and the big thing we've realised is that, while we knew it would be emotional, we had no idea just HOW emotional it would be.

Have you actually been seen by the fertility people?  If we had gone with the NHS we were looking at about 18 month wait for sperm (we have to pay for treatment privately but could get the sperm), but we've been able to get it privately.  There were tests and paperwork to sort out, but once we had the sperm, we could get treatment immediately.

We have found it pretty confusing, and we're learning as we go.  

Hope things go ok for you x


----------



## thedreadpersephone

Hi everyone, I've just joined the forum and wanted to introduce myself.  I identify as lesbian and my partner is a trans man.  We have been together for nearly 10 years and are currently waiting for an appointment at an NHS fertility clinic.  We started all this over 6 months ago and had already been waiting for various other factors to fall into place before starting, so I am feeling pretty frustrated that we haven't made much progress yet.  Then again I'm generally quite an impatient person!  I expected that the difficult part would be when we were actually at the stage of trying to conceive, I didn't anticipate how much time it would take before even getting to that stage.  

I've been struggling to find anyone who understands what I'm going through.  My partner is supportive obviously but he is less emotionally affected by the whole process than me.  He works in the NHS and often looks at things from a 'big picture' perspective when it comes to waiting times etc.  My family, especially my mum, are very keen for me to have kids but they did it the old fashioned way and have no idea what it is like to go through a clinic.  Most of my friends don't have kids and aren't at the stage where they are seriously considering it.  One of my friends does have 2 kids but she irritates me the most by making comments when they misbehave like 'And to think you want to have kids!'  I was on a ******** group for lesbians who are ttc through donor insemination but they mainly seemed to be DIY and didn't have a clue what I was talking about when I mentioned clinics or whatever.  Each to their own of course and I can understand why people would rather not have medical intervention but it all sounded highly unscientific to me.  So basically I'm looking for people who have a bit more knowledge and experience of trying to conceive through a clinic.  I look forward to getting to know you


----------



## welshginge

Welcome & yes, clinics can be a minefield! The waiting is definately the worst part, used to do my head in! Good news is there's lots of us on here who have been through clinics so someone is sure to know answers to questions. You can also read previous threads too. We have a ******** group too but it's secret but if you would like I can add you (just PM me your name & what your profile pic looks like). Best of luck x


----------



## thedreadpersephone

Thanks welshginge


----------



## EllieBrighton

Hello, I'm Ellie and am 20 weeks pregnant with a baby girl after donor sperm after IUI. I am single, gay and living in Brighton, would live to meet with anyone similar to swap stories! 

Ellie xxx


----------



## mutley18

Hi all, 
Im very new to all this so finding it all very confusing!!!  
Heres a bit about me: im 33 (soon) and my wife is 44. We have been together for 7 years and married for nearly 2 and have decided the time is right to start looking into having a family. We havent been to see GP or anything yet because we wanted to have an idea of what to expect before we went but tbh it looks like every GP, every area is different!!! I have emailed my pct to ask for their policy on offering fertility treatment to same sex couples and once we have that we can look at options open to us. 

Its all such a mine field!!!! How has anyone else started the process and how long are we looking at before treatment can begin??

Many thanks


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi everyone, I'm 26 and my wife is 29. We self-referred to CARE Manchester for IUI only to find (via the NHS) that I had a blocked tube and would need it removing, then go on to start IVF. I feel lucky to have found I had fertility problems this early - we could have paid for several IUI cycles before trying to find out why it wasn't working. 

We will hopefully be starting IVF with donor sperm at Leeds soon; first appointment with the consultant is next week. 

My advice to anyone embarking on treatment is not to always take no for an answer. We were looked at like lepers by the first GP we saw, who told us to "try a few times" by ourselves before seeking treatment (er, we are two women..?). Swift change of GP meant I was pushed forward for fertility tests to avoid paying for treatment that was never going to work and I discovered my fertility issues BEFORE starting anything.


----------



## mutley18

Hi sarahsuperdork,  Good luck with IVF   
What tests did your GP do to discover your fertility issues? I am going to my GP soon to ask for fertility tests so we can find out if i have any issues but not sure what to ask for??!!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

mutley18 said:


> Hi sarahsuperdork, Good luck with IVF
> What tests did your GP do to discover your fertility issues? I am going to my GP soon to ask for fertility tests so we can find out if i have any issues but not sure what to ask for??!!


Thanks.  I have a family history of PCOS so they were checking for that at first; I had an ultrasound that came back healthy so they decided to do a laparoscopy in hospital to check my tubes. I don't know if that's normal procedure (it's quite invasive, especially when you're not expecting anything to be wrong) but I'm glad it was offered because I was due to start IUI. With one blocked tube and the other not being much good either, IUI would never have worked. You'll find that some PCTs are more willing to help with diagnostics than others - I was lucky to have a very supportive GP.


----------



## mutley18

My sister has pcos!! I havent got any symptoms but it does worry me that i have it cos i want to egg share and cant if i have pcos!!Im seeing GP in just over a week so we'll see!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

I don't think having PCOS means you can't egg share, not sure but I was always under the impression that it wouldn't make a difference. Technically, I'm multi cystic (according to a nurse, I'd never heard of that before) because I'm about two cysts short of being classed as having polycystic ovaries. I have many of the symptoms of the syndrome but I'm hoping IVF will bypass all that!


----------



## mutley18

I cant wait to get started!! Keep me posted how you get on


----------



## cat-fish

Hi everyone,
I'm 33 and... I guess lesbian-side-of-bisexual is the best way of putting it? I'm (if all goes well) about to go through FET for the first time - I originally planned to have IVF three years ago and went through the whole process of egg sharing but had to cancel my actual transfer and freeze my embryos due to some pretty major health issues on my part - it's a long and boring story but I ended up being diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos syndrome (a disorder affecting connective tissue) and for various reasons wasn't able to go through with the FET for a few years. Now I finally am - scary and exciting at the same time.



mishboz753 said:


> I have 5 ice babies waiting me, but have struggled with the thought of using them alone, ever since my relationship split. It almost has felt like I've let them down. So for the past few years I have been trying to get my head in the right place and come to terms with the fact that some things just don't turn out as planned!! Lol.


sounds like we're in a pretty similar position - I'm not with a partner either, I have 7 frozen blastocysts and I know just what you mean about that weird feeling of 'letting them down'. Hope everything goes well for you


----------



## MadameCissy

Hi, I'm a 28 year old lesbian originally from Holland but in the UK for the past 5 years. I'm in a civil partnership (got hitched in 2010). My partner is 43, which is one of the reasons I'll be carrying our child - if we're lucky enough to conceive. We're hoping for our first attempt in the next few weeks; I am waiting for AF so I know when to expect my O


----------



## DrT74

Hi all. 
Just a quick intro. I'm 38 (nearly 39 though ) and my fiancée is 32 and we've been together for 7 years  and live in the North East. We're having our treatment with LWC and I Start my medication for cycle one of IVF this afternoon along with ovary scan number 1!!! Am starting to get a bit nervous now that the time is finally here to start our long awaited family making!! Soooooo excited too though.

Ttfn


----------



## AEK76

Hi everyone, 

Quick intro, I am 36 and my partner 34. We are planning to start a family, currently awaiting a call back from local hospital regarding fertility treatment. I suffer from psoriatic arthritis and have been off all my strong medications for 4 months now preparing myself for getting pregnant, I have to wait 6 months to be safe as the drugs can cause rather nasty birth defects. We've been to LWC for an initial consultation appointment but found them to be very pushy and not very friendly so hoping that the local clinic can help us. 

So this is us!


----------



## mel and anna

I'm new to this. Myself and my partner have been going through the ivf process for a while now. It has been a lengthy emotional process.... Both have been quite sick and mood swings have been pretty awful (me mostly).... My partner produced 18 eggs for me. only 1grade A so we chose to have that put back (obviously)... We did everything we was supposed to... We googled everything imaginable and spent hours a day online questioning everything.... We did our pregnancy test a day early (I'm shocked I waited that long. Actually went insane) our first beta hcg was 15pt and it was 1500   next hcg was 19dpt and was 8250. I'm currently going crazy looking at every twin post there is.... Any info is more than welcomed. I love reading your experiences.


----------



## Glitterintheair

Hi new ladies! 

Just to let you know there are lots of lovely lgbt women on these boards and we have a group on ******** (completely closed and secret) if any of you would like to join it please feel free to send me a private message on here and I will add you to the group. It's really helped me over the past 3 years and we've all made some very good friends on there. We have meet ups too, for those with kiddies and those still trying, love Gemma (glitter) xx


----------



## Spaks

Hi everyone, I'm new here and was really happy to find this thread!
My wife and I are going through our first IVF cycle. We've been together 12 years and in a civil partnership for 6 years and we live in Scotland. We tried DIY DI for a year with our known donor (a very close gay friend) with no success. We both got checked out, I was fine but he had low motility and low count. We had the option then of IUI with an anonymous donor or ICSI IVF with our known donor. Because of all the reasons we decided to try for a child with our known donor in the first place we chose to go down the IVF route. I have high amh so was on the short protocol. I found the injections and scans relatively easy and stress free. Everything seemed to go well - they retrieved 8 eggs, 7 were mature and 6 fertilised normally. On the day of transfer there was one really good 5d embryo, 1 morula and 3 others that were a bit behind but looking okay. They transferred the single blast, called the next day to let us know that only 1 of the remaining embryos was good enough to freeze. 
We're now almost at the end of our 2ww - to say I haven't found this part so easy would be an understatement. We test tomorrow. I have had intermittent cramps over the last 2 weeks with sore enlarged boobs (until the day my period was due - not unusual for my cycle) and quite bad headaches. Was quite hopeful for a while but now I think these were due to the progesterone (crinone gel).  I have been having quite bad cramps over the last day or two with a bit of brown spotting, which is convincing me that it hasn't worked and my body is trying to have a period through the progesterone. But there is still hope until I do that test tomorrow!
If this cycle doesn't work we have the frozen embryo and could probably afford one more full cycle so I'm trying to keep positive whatever happens!


----------



## bonnie_m

Hi everyone, just discovered this board. My partner and I are trying AI at home using a known donor. Only just had our first attempt a week ago but I can see there will be testing times waiting to see what happens!


----------



## bonnie_m

Ps - is there a post that explains what all the acronyms mean? I'm a bit lost with some of them


----------



## Mish3434

hi Bonnie, Welcome to FF, here is a link to all the abbreviations http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=190482.msg2945198#msg2945198

Shelley x


----------



## Kerrymc

Hi - I'm new to this forum but wanted to post.  My wife and I are just starting but are already facing a few set-backs.  I'm 40 (we met late in life) and at our first consultation I was told I had a low egg reserve, and today got the news back that my AMH level is 0.6 which is pretty non-existent    I'm trying to stay positive and thought finally posting on here might help.  Any words of encouragement would be appreciated - really need a little bit of hope right now


----------



## murchy

Hi. I am in a lesbian relationship and we want to have children and not sure what our options are Fertility treatment prices are very confusing?? Can anyone help by simplifying my options??


----------



## chellelauz

Hello, My wife and I are currently just about to start our first try of ivf at CRGW, my wife already has 3 children from a previous relationship all born by natural births and conceptions! and we live in the caerphilly area of south wales! We are new to all this forum stuff and to the whole ivf experience! so would be great to talk to others in similar positions


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi murchy - it depends on where you live and which clinic you're interested in as to what your options are and how much it will cost. It also depends on your health - if your fertility is fine, you'll be able to go for IUI. If not, you may need IVF.

Hi chellelauz - good luck for your upcoming cycle, are you on long or short protocol? My wife and I are starting next week.


----------



## chellelauz

Hi 
We are going for treatment planning tomorrow so will find out everything then.... very daunting but very exciting


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Exciting! Let us know how you get on.


----------



## Car89

Hi, I'm needing some advice from any one that can help, Me and my partner have been discussing children for some time now but the problem is I don't have a clue where to start! Who do I speak to to find out more , any direction would be brilliant , thanks


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Car89 - hi, good luck on your journey. You can self-refer to a private clinic or go via your GP, whichever is best for you. It depends on where you are and whether you have any fertility issues as to whether or not you can get NHS funding; all areas are different. I found it helpful going via my GP, who referred me for treatment with my partner.


----------



## chellelauz

Hello again   

Me and chelle had our planning appointment and we are good to go, lots of forms had to be filled in, short and long protocol wasn't mentioned but we are starting medication in september very nervous about all the injections etc!!!  

Murchy & Car89 we are new to all this its our first time going for ivf, we looked into clinics in our areas and just rang for information and went from there......we are doing partner to partner egg sharing meaning that chelle will have the egg collection and then the embryo transfer will go to me  so it would be chelles eggs put into me thought it would be a nice way for both of us to be involved ;-) just means double the medication etc

any questions or advice no probs x


----------



## jsygrl22

Hi  
My wife is currently 6w6d pregnant after 8 unsuccessful IUI and clomid rounds and finally one round of IVF which worked! 
We have spent 2.5 years trying to get to this point now thinking what do we do now!  
We live in a very small community and don't know any other lgbt parents... 
We have our first scan tomorrow and don't know what to expect or what they are looking for! Any ideas?


----------



## Mini Us

Morning jsygrl22,


Congratulations!!! & welcome. Typically, for the 1st scan, they'll be checking that the pregnancy is progressing in the right place i.e. not ectopic etc. You may be able to see a teeny flickering heartbeat too although at times it's still too early to tell.


Where are you based? My wife & I are in London.


Good luck with your scan today


MiniUs(G)


----------



## jsygrl22

Hi MiniUs(G)
Well we had a bit of a shock.... The dr found two heartbeats!! We are having identical twins!! :-O
We are in that 2% we were told of who can conceive twins following blastocyst transfer.
Shocked! Excited! Delighted! And slightly terrified! lol
Don't think it has quite sunk in yet..., but also aware that it is early days. Have another scan booked in 2 weeks.
We are in Jersey, don't know of any other LGBT parents at all so would be great to have a link to some, even if its online!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

jsygrl - That's amazing, congratulations, I bet you're over the moon!


----------



## Mini Us

Oh wow!!! That's awesome! Congratulations!!!


I remember that feeling of shock extremely well  We've been there twice(!), my wife was pregnant with twins earlier this year (but we lost them at 22+6 weeks) - we did have 2 day-5 blasts put back...and the 2nd shocker which we're still recovering from was my early scan... 2 day-3 embies put back = triplets!!! I'm currently 20+4 weeks with 2 identicals & a fraternal.


Feel free to pm me if you have any questions - something to find out sooner rather than later is whether your twins share the same placenta...


Good luck with your next scan  


There's also an ** group with loads of mummies & mummies-to-be who'll have tons of advice & support & info


MiniUs(G)


----------



## jsygrl22

@sarahsuperdork thank you and yes completely over the moon! Hadnt even considered multiples, as only had one blastocyst transferred, didn't know that it could divide after that into twins! They are identical
Monochromic and monoamniotic. So my wife has to have scans every two weeks. Will be nice to see how they grow  
@Minius congrats! My wife is really tired so can't imagine how you feel carrying 3!!! :-O
Thank you... We can't wait for the next scan!


----------



## jsygrl22

I've noticed on other threads that there is a ******** group - could someone please send me details as find ** easier to navigate than this forum! Thanks!


----------



## Glitterintheair

Jsygrl22 - hi my names Gemma and I run the ******** group with some other ladies - if you'd like to send me a private message I can give you the information


----------



## jsygrl22

@glitterintheair
Thanks Gemma, have sent you a PM, hope you got it ok!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Why is the ******** group so secret that we have to PM for the details?


----------



## Glitterintheair

Because Fertility Friends don't like people putting their full names on here and/or personal details 

Glitter x


----------



## nikki1985

Hi I was wondering has anybody tried the famous "turkey baster" method and succeed?  We really want ivf ti be the last option xx look forward to your replies xx


----------



## ssltw

Hi everyone! I've just joined and thought I'd introduce myself. My wife and I are in the very early stages, still trying to figure out all of our options. We've got as far as deciding that I will carry, and we have our first appointment with the doctor next week to see what tests can be done and to check if there will be any funding available. Our surgery does pre-appointment telephone appointments with the doctor, who we spoke to last night. He said he will have to do some research before our appointment - not sure if that's a good or bad thing! We're out in the sticks a bit so I think we might be the first lesbians he's come across, ha!

We both went for an initial consultation at a clinic in London a couple of months ago, when they carried out an ultrasound and found that I have the appearance of polycycstic ovaries, but not the syndrome, so I'm not sure how much this will have an effect when we begin TTC, hopefully I can be referred for some tests to look into this further.

It's so nice to see so many other people who are all in the same boat, and I look forward to getting to know you all!


----------



## chellelauz

Hey guys, its been a while hope everyone is doing okay!!! Me and chelle have been away camping and then a last min hols to spain then back to going pretty much straight into treatment!! ARRRGGHHHH scary but soo excited!!!
We have our first injection tonight well I'm saying that and its chelle who has first one tonight my first one will be monday....really hate injections solo pooping myself lol

Great to hear everyones good news, only looked back a few pages but so surprised and happy for you Jsygrl22 and Mini us, twins and triplets!!!! blooming amazing!!!! big congrats!!! hope everything goes well 

keep in touch guys love reading everyones stories and questions etc, i bought the ivf stories book that was recommended on here somewhere and read most of it on hols until my bag got pinched on the beach now i feel its a curse :-( but what i read of it was fab!!!


----------



## chellelauz

Hey everyone, its been a bit quiet on here is everyone ok?

wheres everyone at the moment with treatment etc?

afm we have started our medication, at the mo we are both on dr and ec is scheduled for oct 7th arrgghhh scary but exciting!!!

keep in touch guys xxx


----------



## sarahsuperdork

chellelauz - Great news that you have a date for EC already. How are you finding downreg? We got a positive this week so cautiously excite, just waiting for early scan!


----------



## chellelauz

Awww thats fab!!!! Congrats! I know its still early days though but sooo exciting!  

Me and Chelle are both doing the injections as she's doing the EC and i'm having the ET, she started 2 days earlier than me and has been fab and finding them ok at mo but she's only 5 days in so i suppose no side effects yet, I however found it a nightmare for the first one, got myself really worked up hate injections big time!!!! if i was at a doctors i think i would have been a bit better but the idea of us doing it ourselves freaks me out!!!! but i did it!    and the 2nd night was a bit better then last night i was fine , so i suppose u just get use to it.... Really didnt realise how much we all have to go through to try and get a little miracle!  how long did you have to dr for? we have to do this until end of sept :-( a lot longer than i thought......


----------



## sarahsuperdork

It's definitely something you get used to! I did 15 days of downreg and just 8 days of stimms so from starting (25th July) to BFP (2nd Sept) wasn't long at all. Hope you manage to get through with no side effects! It's great that you're going through it together.


----------



## chellelauz

ha ha yes good and bad thing about us going through it together!! ;-)  Great that we can experience it all together and both be involved in the process, think its really special and a good story to tell the child if we ever get lucky enough to have one! but bad in that we may end up in moods at same etc we'll be killing each other   ha ha

Your dr and stimms etc was quite short wasnt it, i would have much preferred that.......chelle started dr on 31st august and i started 2nd sept and our baseline scans are not till 24th sept :-( so quite a while until then, and then ec mon 7th oct.  We dont even know what happens after dr i know its different for everyone but we have no idea whatsoever.


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Chelle will stimm as she's having EC, it stimulates the ovaries to release more eggs for IVF. You can start stimms when your lining is thin enough. Mine was really short, I was so grateful!


----------



## mrsww

Hi everyone,

Thought I'd introduce myself as have been visiting as a guest for ages and have just joined.

I'm 35 and my wife is 39 (married in NZ on August 19th) and we are just starting the family process.  I'm so confused as to the first steps to take though.

We are in East Berkshire and therefor to old for NHS help so will be going privately.  We think either Hammersmith or Spire clinics and I really need to call them to find out everything I guess.  Although I'm worried my BMI is too high (33) and they won't treat anyway so wondering if I should wait to drop down or call now and maybe we can start.

I've read so much that I'm totally confused in what to do, will be glad of the support that you all give to each other.


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi mrsww, the BMI limit for private is higher than NHS (theirs is 30) so you'd probably be ok but treatment has been shown to be more successful if you're closer to a healthy weight so it can be worth losing some anyway. You can either self-refer to a private clinic (going to an open evening is a great way to get info) or you can ask your GP to refer you. Congratulations on your marriage!


----------



## TanyaandKelly

Hi everyone, my name is Tanya and my partner is Kelly. We are looking to start our family next year and are really looking for information, personal experience and advice on how to best achieve this! 
Any comments welcome!


----------



## kitkatd

Hi
I am new on here and thought I would share my experiences to get some feedback and advice from others.
I have been trying to get pregnant with a donor, he comes over when my monitor changes from low to high and then peak and I use his sperm fresh, I have been using fertility gel before putting the sperm in an instead cup and inserting that in me, I usually leave it in overnight.
I originally had two cycles of IUI at a private hospital but after the money ran out, I had to find a donor. I am now on my second donor and I reckon I have had around 7 tries now.
I have started having acupuncture regularly (once a week) and have been given herbal pills to take to help with fertility.
My cycles are anything from 30 - 38 days, average being around 33 and I ovulate from around day 14 - 19.
I am awaiting treatment for IVF but have to wait until November for my first appointment with the drs. 
I have decided to carry on with the donor until the IVF becomes official. 
My acupuncturist has told me this week that my ovaries are sluggish and I have been told previously that my liver can be sluggish too ! I have had many tests done to check all is ok internally and I have been told that I am ovulating every month and that I am on the high end of the low bracket for fertility for my age group.
Things have got better for me recently as I got a job and feel more positive, I am trying to do yoga and meditation when I can and have started drinking raspberry leaf tea to try and help.
After reading all this is there anything that anyone can tell me that can help with trying to get pregnant, any advice or tips ?
Has anyone else used acupuncture before and is it worth the money or a waste of time ?
I hope to hear back from some of you.
Thanks


----------



## chellelauz

everyone!!! how are you all doing?

Welcome to the new ones, and good luck to everyone where ever you are in this fantastic process!

Have any of you thought of doing an ivf diary on here? I have started one: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=312294.0

Any questions then just ask


----------



## Vicky1986

Hi all   
Completely brand new to all of this, I'm in a same sex relationship and recently started a cycle of Buserelin for IVF. My partners very supportive although I have been a nightmare with mood swings etc but reading other peoples experience of Buserelin I've had it easy!!!!!
Any advice or even friendly chats are very welcome


----------



## Vicky1986

Hi, I have tried Reflexology and found that very relaxing and a good way to feel positive about yourself and life in general.
Although at the time I wasn't using it for fertility but other reasons, however this may help to relax and take away some strain from an over active mind!!!!


----------



## DRocks

Is the ******** group just for pregnant people or can adopters join?


----------



## chellelauz

Hey guys, how is everyone?

We have just had egg collection this morning, well Chelle has not me!  Shes currently sleeping on the sofa    It went well we were there at 7am!   she was in and out by 740am! and we left by 930am after munchin on some toast lol Chelle said she felt everything and was awake through it all, although when she came back into the room where i was waiting she did ask me how she got there 10 mins later, also again half hour later lol  anyway it went well and they got 8 eggs   much more than we thought they would get as there werent many follicles and the one ovary was very high!!!! So we are happy at the moment but very nervous for the dreaded call to see if any have fertilised by the morning!!! eeeekkkk    they didn't tell us if they got to the high side so will ask when we see them next but i am assuming they did!

Good luck and happy vibes to everyone else who has had EC or ET or on that dreaded 2ww xxxxxx


----------



## chellelauz

vicky you emailed me didnt u? if it was u i will reply as soon as x


----------



## Dawn &amp; Chris

Hi everyone.  I'm new to FF and wanted to introduce myself.  I'm married to my wife and we've been trying for a baby for 12 months with no success.  I've recently had a hystoscopy, laparoscopy and dye test and was diagnosed with endometriosis and adhesions.  The consultant have advised us that the next 3 months for home insemination will be our most fertile time, if it does not work IVF only.  I am so scared of starting again next week, I'm taking my frustrations out on my wife.  To make matters worse I turned 40 this year and everything I read tells me my fertility is declining fast!!  I don't know how to cope with all this.  

How do people cope
XX


----------



## Yolo

Good luck Dawn and Chris, hope it went/goes well.

I am also new to FF.  My gf and I are looking at IVF with intra partner ovum transfer (me to her) and possibly egg sharing with a third party too.  We have had a couple of consultations and counselling sessions and I have come to realise that there is so much more to think about than I ever thought there would be.  Hopefully the FF community will help!


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*Yolo*, best of luck whatever you decide to do x


----------



## odonnells

Hi everyone, male gay couple here.  We're very fortunate not to have any fertility issues, but obviously we need a surrogate to help us realise our family plans.

Are there any other couples with experience of host surrogacy with donor eggs?  We have started the process with Manchester Fertility and our next step is to find a suitable surrogate.  We've applied to join COTS but they seem to not be open to new members at the moment so not sure if we'll get in.

We're based in Manchester and would like to hear from IPs and host surrogates who can relate to this story!

Thanks!


----------



## 2mums1978

Hi all, I am new to FF. I am a lesbian and in a very loving relationship. My partner and I have recently started on the IVF journey, one which seems to be happening very quickly and has been surprisingly  positive (so far so good) We have our first appointment at a private clinic in Manchester this month through the NHS. 

Does anyone have any advice on treatment being given if I am slightly overweight? I would be the one receiving treatment but as far a guideline go I have 1st to lose... I am also 35 so worry about my age :/ 

Would love some advice.


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi 2mums, good luck with your treatment. You'll still be given treatment if you're overweight but it's definitely better to lose some if you can as it can improve your chances of success. NHS guidelines usually say that a BMI of under 30 is ok for NHS funding (so overweight but not obese) and private treatment gives more leeway if you're self-funding. I also wouldn't say your age was anything to worry about and hope your first appointment goes well.


----------



## 2mums1978

Thanks Sarah  I'm so bloody nervous! I'm just questioning everything at the moment! I'm really on a health kick, exercise and healthy eating I never say diet or I'm sure to fail and eat cake! Ha.


----------



## Fahrenheitgirl

Hi all, my wife and i just started researching about options to get pregnant here in Netherlands, sorting through the insurance arrangement ( still in process ). We are hoping to understand all the jargons and the whole journey from others, experience before making our first consult.

We would like to have use my egg, with anon donor sperm, with her being the surrogate so that we both can be part of the whole pregnancy experience. However, i suppose it depends on our condition and consult with the doctor. I hope to keep you all updated here and have some virtual support 

It's such a huge thing for us so we decided to keep it to ourselves until we have good news to share. This English forum definitely helps....since i speak zero dutch   

Wish us luck!


----------



## Elerifairy

Hi All,

My wife and I are just at the beginning of our Journey to becoming a family. 
First went to the doctors in December who has been really supportive and referred us straight away to the fertility team at the local hospital.
They have been very supportive but told us not to get our hopes up too high for funding as if there is no fertility issue they don't think the commissioning group will fund us  
The good thing is that they are getting us both fully tested to ensure that if there are any fertility issues then we have a chance of being funded.
It's horrible to be sat here thinking "I really hope I have blocked tubes!" 

If everything is okay and funding gets rejected then we will probably look at me being an egg doner in order to make ivf more affordable - but also because I figure that as we're relying on doner sperm then it would be a positive thing to do for someone who needs eggs!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi Farenheitgirl and Elerifairy! Wishing you both lots of luck starting your journey.

Elerifairy, you don't want blocked tubes, however convenient it would be money-wise! It's great that you're able to get fully tested on the NHS, I was too and it really helps things along. If you're given the all clear, IUI is a much cheaper and less invasive option than IVF.


----------



## Elerifairy

We have looked at iui but the costs versus success rates makes IVF the first port of call for us I think


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Bear in mind that success rates include everyone having IUI and don't split the figures down into categories. You're looking at figures that include couples with varying degrees of fertility issues (diagnosed and undiagnosed) as well as same-sex couples. Same-sex couples often do really well with IUI. Obviously, IVF does have higher success rates but you need to trade that off against the cost and invasiveness of the process. If I'd been fertile, I'd have gone for IUI for both those reasons.


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*SarahSuperDork*, hope you don't mind me asking but how long did your ivf cycle take to do? Do you start at a certain time in your cycle? X


----------



## sarahsuperdork

It depends on your protocol (long or short) as to which cycle day you start on. I was on long protocol, so I started downreg drugs on CD21 for two weeks. Then when AF arrives and your lining is thin, you can move on to stimming drugs. Times vary for everyone as it depends on how you react. I was downregging for 15 days, then stimming for 9 days. From starting drugs to pregnancy test, it was 40 days in total.


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*Sarah*, thank you. I thought it would be longer for some reason. Probably because everything seems to have gone so slow up to now for us. Best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy. X


----------



## sarahsuperdork

If you're on short protocol, it's even quicker. Thanks!


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

I'm hoping I won't need it but I don't think this iui business is going to work for us. Were about to do our last one so will know soon enough. X


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Wishing you lots of luck, fingers crossed for you.


----------



## Kandz12

Hi all.  We are a same sex couple in Kent getting ready to start IUI with donor sperm (had all my investigations and have our initial consultation at Homerton on Thurs...very excited but not sure what to expect!) This website has been great to look at and get us ready-so many friendly and inspiring posts. If anyone is going through similar locally or at Homerton would be great to hear from people.


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*Kandz*, best of luck to you both. X


----------



## dojiejo

Hi Everyone

My wife and I are also newbies. We are hoping to start trying for a family in the second half of this year. We are based in London and have already been to a information sessions and subsequent appointment at LWC with the plan to try simulated IUI as the first step. We also have had our counseling appointment so really we are set to go when the time is right. Lucky for us we have a great supportive GP who has allowed me to get all the blood tests that needed to be done on the NHS and after seeing her to see if she would refer me for a Hyscoy before going ahead with the IUI she has decided to refer us to the Homerton. We have our appointment in early May so currently have our fingers crossed that we may get access to funding (we know it is a long shot but definitely worth trying). 

Good luck to everyone with their own journeys! 

Kandz12 I would be very interested to hear how your appointment at the Homerton goes for Thursday.


----------



## Kandz12

Thanks for the good luck AndLou!

I'll let you know how it goes Dojiejo. We went to the information evening at Homerton last week and it was very much aimed at IVF and heterosexual couples so we are hoping to find out a lot more on Thursday. 

X


----------



## Little_Pea

Hi,

New here but been reading as a guest for a few months

My DP and I are both 30 years old and are having our first partner to partner egg sharing IVF this Easter.

We attended the Alternative Family Parenting Show in Autumn 2013.

At the end we signed up for half price consultations at the LWC, our intention then was to have a fertility MOT and plan our treatment for the start of 2015.

However after various research and appointments we decided not to put off our dreams of starting a family and instead decided to start ASAP.

Our initial dream was to partner to partner egg share to another also.

However We were rocked to find out DP had AFC of 6/7 and an AMH of 4.3

My AFC is 12 and my AMH Is 19.6.

So after the test results we decided there was no time to waste.

We have a great GP who has done all our blood tests on the NHS.
We have purchased our drugs - our fridge is rather full 
We bought sperm which we have had to cancel as we had to put our treatment back to Easter due to DPs un caring boss. (Lost us £150)
Final blood tests due back this week 
Both half way through Microgynon
Due to Start IVF at the start of April with DP donating her eggs to me to carry.

How exciting


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*LittlePea*, it's super exciting. Best of luck to you both. Fingers and everything crossed. Xx


----------



## chellelauz

We have done partner to partner egg sharing too but it didn't work   we have 2 frozen though so are trying again as soon as! good luck! x


----------



## Little_Pea

We've had our treatment plan confirmed

28th March - Gonalpep injection got me
31st march - DP and I take our last pill
4th April - DP and I have our baseline
Scans, injection tutorial and DP starts her Ivf drugs.
Scans est 8th 10th 12th and 14th
EC est 14th to 17th of April
ET 3 to 5 days later

All over the Easter weekend. Hope this is a good sign


----------



## Natters O

Hello everyone!

I am under St.Mary's In Manchester. It has been a very slow and emotional process getting to this point but my partner /wife and I are finally 'in treatment'.

In brief, a bit about me............. 

I am 33, in a same sex relationship so always knew that the journey for getting a family may be tricky. After going private initially and having 3 cycles of IUI we had no luck with a pregnancy. A few tests later and I was referred for IVF under the NHS,  hence why we are now under St.Mary's, Manchester.

Started the down regulation phase (long protocol) the beginning of February this year but am still on this phase. It hasn't been plain sailing but I am doing everything as advised so that hopefully we can move onto the next phase (stimulation drugs) in the next month or so. Never did I imagine it could be so complicated and tricky. 

Must admit, not sure about going public and posting on here but just think that it's such a difficult process and looking for support from wherever I can get it. So, going to see how it goes.

See you all about xx


----------



## Little_Pea

Natters good luck to you and your DP.  Fingers crossed for you both xx


----------



## Natters O

Thanks Little_Pea.

Good luck to you and your DP too......sounds like it's all going to be getting going! Exciting times!!!!! xx


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Good luck all, very exciting to see a few people starting out!


----------



## Little_Pea

Natters... Indeed less than two weeks till my gonal pep injection and less than three weeks till DP starts the IVF drugs... 

Good luck everyone


----------



## Natters O

sarahsuperdork said:


> Good luck all, very exciting to see a few people starting out!


Thanks xx


----------



## Natters O

Little_Pea said:


> Natters... Indeed less than two weeks till my gonal pep injection and less than three weeks till DP starts the IVF drugs...
> 
> Good luck everyone


Busy times! Wishing you lots of luck xx


----------



## Little_Pea

Natters O said:


> Little_Pea said:
> 
> 
> 
> Natters... Indeed less than two weeks till my gonal pep injection and less than three weeks till DP starts the IVF drugs...
> 
> Good luck everyone
> 
> 
> 
> Busy times! Wishing you lots of luck xx
Click to expand...

And you and your DP xx


----------



## Smw88uk

Hi,

I am a 25 year old woman in a relationship with my 28 year old partner and we are currently going through the process of referral through NHS Wales

Reasons for this is due to same sex couple and myself having endometriosis (also had ovarian cyst removed last year)

We are at the stage where we are going for appointment in Cardiff on 30th April to discuss the eligibility criteria after going to the initial consultation 6 months ago.

I am hopefully on track to being 30 BMI but it is worrying me, my partner won't achieve it by April 30th. We haven't been informed of the criteria until received the letter last week.. Throughout entire process nothing has been mentioned about BMI.

Has anyone got any insight on this? Will they accept us onto waiting list if almost at 30? Will they consider the endometriosis over the weight criteria If I don't quite achieve 30?

If we are denied due to BMI, what is the next step? 

Are you told at that appointment if you are successful or do you have to wait for another letter?

Sorry for all the questions, have lots we want clearing up or support with

Thank you


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi Smw88uk. As far as I know, DW's BMI wasn't an issue when we started our treatment. I think she was slightly over the magic number of 30 but as I was the one undergoing the actual treatmemt and my BMI was under at about 25.5, it was fine.

You will probably receive a letter informing you whether or not you've been successful in securing funding. Every CCG (area) is different, but that's how it worked in my area. My consultant put forward an application for us and wrote to us when the decision had come through.

You wouldn't necessarily be refused based on your BMI, but I would imagine you could be put back on a waiting list until you had been successful in losing weight.


----------



## Smw88uk

Thank you  sarahsuperdork for the reply. 

We are hoping for good news at the appointment and it's good to hear that partners BMI doesn't affect it. We had thought it wouldn't be an issue but the way criteria was worded threw us a bit!

How long did the process take for you and your  wife?

My GP  put the referral in May 2013, we have been to one appointment in September 2013 in Cardiff with a consultant and now received all the forms to fill in ready for appointment in April 2014. Just wondering how long the next stage takes? It's been faster than we thought so far.


----------



## sarahsuperdork

We first saw our GP in April 2012, who referred us straight to the hospital but there was a wait for a laparoscopy to check my tubes and I needed another op after that and had to wait. I think you've already got to that point though, so you shouldn't have that long a wait. We had to wait for a counselling session after that - our clinic made counselling mandatory for couples needing to use a donor, and we had to wait 4 months for one because the service was in high demand. After that, it was quick; counselling was done in May 2013, donor chosen straight after and there was no waiting list for the actual treatment so we started in July 2013.

Everywhere is different in terms of waiting, though; you might find the wait to hear about funding takes a while, or that there's a waiting list for the actual treatment. Hopefully not too long for you though.


----------



## Joanna555

Hello everyone,

Just wanted to introduce myself as I'm new on this site. My partner and I are going through the initial stage at Homerton in London. Hoping for un medicated IUI to start with, but we'll roll with the punches depending on what they say. Good luck to everyone trying!


----------



## kitkatd

Hello
I'm fairly new on here.
Are there any other lesbian couples on here going through the IVF treatment in Manchester ?


----------



## chellelauz

Hey everyone i haven't been on this site for a while!!

Back on the treatment hopefully going for FET around 29th May!  

Hope everyone is doing ok? 

Smw88uk me and my partner are based in wales too   We haven't gone through NHS though we just went straight to CRGW they r a fab clinic!

R u doing partner to partner egg sharing? x


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*kitkatd*, hi me and do are doing our 1st round of icsi this month. Hopefully we'll be starting around the 20th. I've got my baseline scan and injection teach next week. I'm getting excited now. Finally seem to be doing something useful. 
We're having treatment at Manchester Fertility. 
Where are you going and where are you up to? X


----------



## Smw88uk

Chellelauz we went to an open evening at CRGW and it was amazing! We will definitely be going with them in the future if need to as we were very impressed!!

We aren't doing partner egg sharing to begin with, but we've spoken about it for any future siblings  I will be carrying first through medicated IUI.

We were told we are on the waiting list with NHS last week and are going to counselling session Monday!  exciting!

How are CRGW with support and timings/wait? X


----------



## Little_Pea

DW and I just got our BFP. We are five weeks and five days pregnant from intra partner egg share! Early days but so excited x


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Congratulations Little Pea, good luck with your 7 week scan! Lovely to hear.

Hope your FET goes well chellelauz, wishing you lots of luck.

Good luck to kitkatd and Jam&Cream at Manchester as well. Lots going on!

AFM our beautiful boy Auron arrived 3 weeks early weighing a teeny 5lb and he's keeping me and DW busy! His due date isn't until Monday.


----------



## chellelauz

Little Pea and    Sarahsuperdork!!!!    

Smw88uk CRGW are fab!!! No wait at all, and the staff there are very caring and compassionate.  Me and chelle are doing FET we did a  partner to partner egg share in our last try which unfortunately was a BFN back in October but then was back on it in Jan as we have 2 frozen good quality ones too  our jan cycle got cancelled due to a cyst but all gone now so we are trying FET again hopefully going to be at the end of May!

It will be me carrying and using Chelles eggs and obviously donor sperm, but in the future I am very keen to try my own eggs too maybe even egg sharing to help someone else out!


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*LittlePea*, congratulations  Hope you have great pregnancy.

*SSD*, he is just beautiful. Congratulations to you both. X


----------



## milliekinillie

Hi 

I'm new to this page.... Me and partner starting the journey once again..... Still in the discussion/find a clinic phase..... Need advise!!!!

I can't use my eggs so plan to use DP's eggs..... Is this still considered egg donation??


Hope everyone is good!!!!


----------



## Little_Pea

This is called intra partner egg sharing 

Not exactly sure what you mean by your question.

But yes your partner would technically be donating her eggs to you


----------



## CCurly

Hi everyone,

Thought I would put a post on here as I'm new to all this. My partner and I got married this summer and are about to undergo our first round of IVF. I am going to carry and so far all the tests have come back looking good (so I've been told).
I have become very stressed with the build up and just want to get going. I'm a bit of a control freak and this seems very outside of my control! Our clinic insists we see a counsellor, which is something I'm not keen on, but understand the reasoning as we will be using a sperm donor.

I wondered how everyone coped with the waiting, does it get easier or only more difficult from here on in?!

Good luck to everyone else and sorry for the rant!


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi CCurly, good luck! I wouldn't say it gets easier or more difficult, just different really. The whole process is all about waiting in different ways! I'm also a bit of a control freak so I found the downreg/stimming uncertainty stressful too. Don't worry about the counselling, it's mostly a formality.


----------



## mrsww

I don't handle the waiting well at all.  We started the process almost a year ago and have had two natural IUIs and hope to start IVF over the next month or so.  I kind of go crazy googling where my wife is more go with the flow although she is trying to keep calm so that I don't go crackers.  I've a consultant appt in two weeks and hoping to get some dates in the diary for starring.  Very nervous about injections etc.

Counselling was fine for us not huge in depth but touching on topics regarding sperm donation in fact it was a bit like a chat with a friend.

Good luck in your journey to a family.


----------



## dojiejo

Welcome Ccurly and good luck. As sarahsuperdork said the waiting is just different. There is always something to wait AF/scans/medication/testing. My DW and I have just tried to distract each other. 

Counselling was really good to think about donor conception and impact on the potential child and how to talk to family about it all.


----------



## Jennywins

Hi all  

Great idea for a post.

Hope everyone is having a good week

x 

Me 37, Wife 38 (f/f Couple - Wife TTC)
Civil Partnership 19 July 2012
First IUI 5/09/14- BFN 20/09/14 (Natural)
Second IUI 3/10/14- BFN 16/10/14 (Natural)
1st Appointment with a new clinic - 20/10/14
Hycose booked - 24/10/1


----------



## poppy05

hi Jenny
welcome, wishing you all the best, just shout if you need any help navigating round


----------



## Jennywins

Many thanks Poppy


----------



## razz_ee

Hello ladies

Just wanted to say hi! I've lurked around on these forums for the past year whilst me and my partner have been getting started with our treatment and have found them incredibly helpful in answering a lot of my questions, particularly regarding same-sex parenting issues.

We're currently self-funding IUI with donor sperm at King's College ACU as partner already has a daughter from a previous relationship. I had my first IUI with clomid on 13th October and today got BFN from a pregnancy test, still no AF though... Must admit to feeling quite low when I saw the negative result, but I've been telling myself all day that it's only our first try.

Anyway - hope to get more involved on the forums from now on - it is not always easy trying to talk to friends and family about what we're going through.


----------



## BeccyS

Hi all, I too have been reading lots of the comments here but this is my 1st post. My partner and I have just had our 1st attempt at IUI which was unsuccessful unfortunately. We are hoping to try again early December.


----------



## Herts85

Hi everyone,

I've lurked on this site for a while now and feel like I've learnt so much reading everyone's stories! Myself and my partner are in the process of setting the date for our first fertility appointment following the GP referral so it's all getting a little real now! 

How long did it take from the first appointment to starting treatment for everyone?

Not sure if anyone here has fertility issues (beyond the lack of sperm) but I already know I have pcos and issues from abdominal surgery as a child. My girlfriend has very recently discovered she may have issues (unable to locate cervix for her first smear) - will they investigate her too or does she need a separate referral? 

Thanks in advance for any help and good luck with your journeys xx


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi Herts85, will your partner carry or will you? I would imagine if you're not sure on that yet, she'd need a separate referral for any fertility investigations but we always knew I'd carry so it was only me that was checked in our case. I had blocked tubes, so I had one removed before starting treatment.


----------



## Herts85

Hi Sarah,

Well we had always assumed me first with me being a year older and having pcos. 
I think we rather naively assumed we'd be ok because we had a back-up should that not work! 

We've got our first appointment at St Alban's in a few weeks so we'll take it from there. We're just going to ask for as much testing as possible to be done on both of us since there's a few issues each. On the plus side we've gone from feeling like we would ideally be trying this time next year to thinking nothing is guaranteed and to get on it as soon as possible!


----------



## Little_Pea

After some recent posts I thought is give the low down on our journey (as I remember it - baby brain)

October 2013 - DP and I went to the alternative parenting show in london, LWC offered half price consultations if booked on the day. We was only going for ideas and had not planned on booking anything but as we knew we would both technically needed a consultation as we wanted to intra partner
Egg share this was a good way to save some money.

November 2013 - we went for our consultant appointment and DP had her scan. Went back ON 5th January 2013 for DP to have an AMH blood test as we hoped to egg share. Saw a different consultant who said DP had a low egg reserve and we couldn't egg share but could intra partner egg share.

Came away discussed it and due to her results we decided to just go for it.... And our baby is due 12 months to the day since that blood test 5/1/15

Our EC and ET were at Easter 2014... This was the date we chose and could have done it earlier. We had to get all the blood tests done some on NHS some private, we also had a lot of forms to fill in and then we both needed to be on the pill to sync our cycles....

Hope this helps

Xx


----------



## CCurly

Hi everyone,

Thought I'd give you a quick update since I last posted. I have had my first round of IVF. I has been a rocky road, and far more draining than I expected. I had EC 3/12/14 and was pleased with 19 eggs collected. However only 5 fertilised and one of those then didn't do anything. I had a 2 day transfer of 2 embies on 5th dec and here I sit waiting for the outcome!  The other 2 were not good enough to freeze so fx for this round!

I wish everyone all the luck in the world.

Cx


----------



## Herts85

Hi Little_Pea, thanks for the update - it's always so helpful to read how other f/f couples have gotten through their treatment. Congratulations, I bet your both counting down the days now! x

CCurly - good luck for OTD, I hope you get a bfp x

Afm, or us I guess! DP and I had our fertility appt and then DP had some gynae tests done, weirdly on the afternoon of the day of our appt but a different hospital. We came away from our fertility appt feeling a little disheartened (everyday homophobia!) and felt that not all of our questions were answered but had a heap of blood tests for me to have on my next cycle. Then DP discovered she has cervix issues, pcos and endo. I did have my suspicions but it's still a bit of shock. I'm trying to get her to absorb it as quickly as possible so we can make decisions about where we go from here but I think she needs a while to catch up


----------



## kitkatd

Hi
Is anyone else on here having treatment at saint marys in Manchester ?
I am on the journey for my first FET which should be happening some time in February, currently on buserelin injections and have a blood test due on 12th Jan to check my levels.
Would be nice to meet fellow lesbians going through a similar experience.


----------



## bethannora

Hi everyone

Hope you don't mind me hijacking your thread!

I am with CRGW in Cardiff, and a month ago had the tests back to say I can be an egg donor. Exciting! Now comes the impatient part of waiting to be matched!

I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions on when the time comes, whether or not we should have one or two implanted? Are there massive risks taken with two? I don't have any fertility issues whatsoever.

Thanks

Bethan


----------



## Onmyown

Hi. My wife and I are new to this. I started suprecur in December and am due for my 1st down regulation scan next week. She is enjoying injecting me daily as the drugs are making me a little grumpy! haha. This is our 1st time, we are using donor sperm and are egg sharing. Just wanted to say hello!


----------



## mrsww

Hi everyone new,

Hope your journey is going well.

Bethannora - I think most UK clinics would limit to one embryo if under 35, maybe two over 35 but would depend on the quality of embryo. 

RandH - hope treatment goes well and you get plenty of eggs to share.

I'm due to start first cycle of ivf with my wife at the beginning of February. Just trying to find best place to find drugs, cheapest so far is £1200.


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*mrsww*, we got the drugs for the fet from asda, they were considerably cheaper and it came that afternoon too.
Best of luck with this cycle, hopefully this is the one. X


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*beth*, are you private? If so you shouldn't have any problems putting 2 back if that's what you want, they did suggest 1 to us but said ultimately it was our decision.
The nhs though told us one and that was the end of that. 
Best of luck x


----------



## Onmyown

Thanks mrsww. We have to get through the down reg scan and the week of menopur before that but we're hopeful it'll all work. It's getting more and more real by the day, starting to get a little nervous now.
I noticed questions about how many they put back, the clinic we are using said they prefer to put only one back as there are more complications when more are put back - higher risks of multiple births, which can lead to higher risks of treatment not working or miscarriages. We were thinking about having 2 put back but it only increases your chances by about 5 percent and from what we have been told, the risks out-weigh that anyway


----------



## CalliesGirl30

Hi everyone me and my partner are very new to this... 
We are desperate to start a family but We have no idea where to begin I am going to see my local gp in a few weeks but have no idea what questions to ask? 
Does anyone have any advice they can offer anything will be appreciated 

Emily and Callie xx


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi Emily and Callie! What you want to do in the beginning is establish where you're at with your fertility (carrying partner) and your GP can help with that. We saw a GP that was as clueless as us and told us we had to go away, "try a few times ourselves" and come back if I didn't get pregnant. Funnily enough, we'd been doing that for years and nothing.  We made another appointment with a different GP, who was amazing. She did all the blood tests we needed. 

Not all GPs will do any sort of testing for you. Some will simply refer you to a private clinic of your choice. If you can, though, push for some fertility investigation on the NHS. I found out I had two blocked tubes, so IUI would never have worked for me. Thanks to my GP, I found that out before we spent any money on private treatment. 

You can self-refer to a private clinic if you want to, you don't need to go through a GP. I'd try to get a basic idea of your fertility first though if your GP will do some blood tests.


----------



## BlueBirds

Hi everyone!

Me and DP had our consultation on Wednesday, we are so split in deciding between iui or ivf using my partners eggs (me carrying) anyone have any advice?


----------



## poppy05

Hi bluebird


Its a decision only the two of you can make, personally i would opt straight for ivf as iui has quite low success rates, however there are plenty of ladies on here who have their families from iui.


good luck in whatever you decide


----------



## BlueBirds

Thank you poppy. 
Can I just ask, how did you find ivf treatment?


----------



## poppy05

I had my first cycle on nhs, (i was married to my ex husband then) then we self funded 2nd cycle, then i changed clinic and egg shared, then ex and i split up, and my wife and i funded a cycle last sept, we have a frozen cycle waiting, which will be my last try.


Have you considered egg share? your ivf would be free, you can still use your partners eggs, you would have to pay for your drugs and your embryo transfer, i dont know where your from, but im with the lister in london and they offer egg share xx


----------



## poppy05

sorry i read that as how did i fund ivf not find it


honestly, ivf is very stressful, it consumes your life whilst doing it, and you need a very strong caring partner to go through it with, the injections are fine as is the proceedures you have to endure, even egg collection isnt as bad as you expect, you will feel hormonal, tearful, excited, happy, sad, a reall roller coaster of emotions, but if it brings you your child you would do it over and over again xx


----------



## BlueBirds

Both were just as helpful. We are at the lwc, we are goi g to book another consultation for my partner to see whether we can use her eggs for starters and obviously egg share is definitely something we would consider. 
That's my only worry, how stressful it is but like you said its all worth it In the end!x


----------



## poppy05

you can keep stress levels to a minimum simply by talking to eachother, understanding how eachother is feeling, def use this forum, its invaluable during treatment, and simple things like a pamper session, even if you do it for eachother, my wife and i often give eachother facials, pedicures, head massages, and it really does help to keep you calm, xx


----------



## BlueBirds

We are completely in this together and I know that we will be there for each other 100%. I've been addicted to this forum since I found it, is that bad lol?
Thank you for all your advice, really has helped a lot x


----------



## poppy05

then you will be fine   
and no your not weird, well if you are then i am too, i have been a member since 2006 and pretty much been on here everyday!!


----------



## BlueBirds

If that's not dedication I don't know what is! 
How long does it normally take from consultation to treatment?


----------



## poppy05

quite quick, you need quite alot of blood work done pre treatment, but most of those can be done all in the one month, if your egg sharing you need to wait for a match, i was lucky and got matched within about 6 weeks, if you set the ball rolling now you will prb be looking at starting within a few weeks rather than months xx


----------



## BlueBirds

Wow that is quick. We have our holiday booked on 2nd March so probably have to wait until after then I presume?


----------



## poppy05

yes you can pretty much choose when xx


----------



## allie_h

Hi everyone,

I have been with my partner for 15 years and we live together outside of gateshead.
I've had my first iui at the center for life fertility clinic in newcastle last Wednesday (4th March). Had a pregnyl injection the day before. Between Wednesday evening (after iui) and Saturday I felt like my ovaries we're going to explode. I called the clinic who said it should get better. It went better on Saturday but now I feel so bloated. I have a scar at the bottom of my tummy due to the removal of an endometriosis cyst, removed over 10 years ago. The skin around the scar has lost sensitivity since. But at the moment it feels really strange around that area and I feel like my skin is being stretched. Possible because of the bloating.
Has this kind of bloating happened to anyone else?
Allie


----------



## Pinkchick

Hi there thought I would join this thread, I've only recently joined here and still trying to navigate it.  
I'm about to start another ivf cycle, probably my last one after what feels like forever trying to conceive. 
I've been with my partner 12 years and we are both desperate for a family. Have had 7 miscarriages Which they put down to auto immune problems. 
This time I am on a different protocol-metformin/menopur and to go on steroids and clexane  this time too. I started the menopur on Sunday and been really sick, hoping that passes soon. 
Really hoping for a sticky one this time.  x


----------



## poppy05

Welcome pinkchick
Very best of luck with your ivf cycle, fingers crossed the new drug protocol helps give you your dream


----------



## Pinkchick

Thanks Poppy I appreciate that. I wish I had joined this site ages ago. It definitely helps to know that your not the only one going through this roller coaster x


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi Pinkchick, good luck!


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

Hi *Pinkchick*,

Best of luck to you both. We've just done our second cycle and I had clexane and steroids this time round, we got our bfp which I believe is totally down to these.
Hope it works for you too. X


----------



## poppy05

Ahh congrats jam&cream   


I just completed my 5th cycle, and after 20 years ttc, my tx journey has come to an end, we are moving onto adoption now, givng ourselves a 6 month break first though, its been a tough ride.


pinkchick ff is an amazing site, it has helped me so much over the years, if you need any help getting around just let me know, cycle buddies is a good area to join during tx, you get alot of support from others cycling at the same time as you


----------



## Pinkchick

Thanks ladies, you've been really helpful.  Jam and Cream, that gives me some hope that it worked for you. I'm really hoping these meds will be what makes the difference! Hope your feeling well. 
Poppy that's a long time, and a lot of heartache but how lovely that your moving on to adoption. 
There comes a time when you have to just stop because this journey is soul destroying. This is definitely my last full cycle, after that We will accept either way what the outcome is as best We can and get on with life  x


----------



## mrsww

Welcome pinkchick, I hope your journey goes well. 

Poppy, all the best for your adoption journey. 

Jam, how are you doing?


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

*Mrsww*, I'm not too bad thanks, getting fatter by the day, I'm not a fan of that to be honest. We've got our 12 week scan next week, I can't wait for that.
How are you? Well I hope. X


----------



## dojiejo

Welcome pinkchick! Sorry it has been such a hard journey for you both. Really hope this is your cycle. 

Poppy - Goodluck for,your adoption journey. Sorry that you have had such a tough journey as well. 

Congrats to all the recent BFP I have seen from many on this thread. All the best for your pregnancies.


----------



## Ask1980

Hi Everyone, 

I've posted a little in the IUI forum but thought I'd say hi here too! We are about to have our 4th IUI next week and I guess I'm just feeling a bit despondent about the whole thing as is my DW as we really thought it would have worked by now! I don't really have anyone to chat to about it as no one other than my boss and a couple of our friends (who's IUI worked 1st time!) knows we are having IUI mainly coz I can't deal with telling people each time it fails! We don't have any LGBT friends either so no one who really understands what it's like! So I'm glad to have found this section!  Anyway on that cheery note I just wanted to say hi!!!


----------



## mrsww

Wow, Jam, 12 week scan already that's great. I'm doing ok very tired but am working 24/5 with a four week old so only getting sleep in stretches of 1.5 hours. I can't tell if I'm rounding out as I'm fluffy anyway have had to buy bigger jeans but it's only because if I'm in tight clothing I feel nauseous. I've had my booking in appt and 12 week scan will be in three weeks when I'm 13 weeks so am hoping they can still do nuchal test. 

Ask and Dojeijo hope your treatment plans are going well and that you get a BFP soon. Ask, we also kept the IUIs amd ivf quiet as well I find as soon as you tell people they keep asking which puts the pressure on. Very few people know now about our BFP we will wait until 12 weeks to tell parents and a few more people.


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Good luck Ask.  We are keeping our FET quiet this time for the same reasons.


----------



## dojiejo

Goodluck Ask - completely understand you feeling despondent. I am feeling the same. We are on our 4th inseminstion/5th cycle and really thought that we would be pregnant by now! Feel free to PM if you need to talk. 

Sarahsuperdork - Goodluck for when you do you FET. 

Mrsww - 10 weeks, that has gone quickly. Hope you start feeling better soon.


----------



## Ask1980

Thank you for your replies!   it's nice to see I'm not alone! 

Mrsww congrats! I like hearing positive stories!


----------



## Fairlie0dd

Newbies!

IVF and Egg Sharing. Anybody else?


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Thanks Dojiejo; wishing you lots of luck too. We're hoping to cycle next month, fingers crossed.

Welcome Fairlie0dd!


----------



## Jam&amp;Cream

Good luck to everyone cycling soon x


----------



## PGTips

Hi FairlieOdd

My partner & I are having IVF with her as my egg donor. She did amazingly with her 'half' of the cycle but things went wrong for me with my meds so we had to make the decision to go ahead with egg collection and fertilisation but to then freeze at the Zygote stage. It's now a waiting game for my cycle to start again so we can thaw some of our frosties and go for FET.

How about you guys?


----------



## Fairlie0dd

Hi PGTips!

Ugh, what a pain having to wait! You have to believe it's part of a big master plan though. Crossing everything for you both!

We are using my eggs and donating anonymously to a recipient. It's a strange but lovely feeling! Haven't done any of this before. we're good to go with all our bloods just awaiting day 20 to start down regulating. My recipient is ahead of me with cycle which is what we need!

All being well we're looking at mid-end May! It's so nerve wracking, isn't it?


----------



## Pinkchick

Hi ladies, hope your all doing ok. I'm just popping on quickly while on my break so not got time to read back the new posts and see what stage your all at-sorry for lack of personals.  
I'm still struggling on with the metformin, tried to increase my dose again but my body just doesn't like it at all  
Got bloods and scan next Tuesday and don't really know what to expect as never used metformin before, I always start with suprecur nasal spray. Does anybody know what I should expect from my scan? I'm still really confused with this new protocol. x


----------



## PGTips

We had hoped to donate half but unfortunately we didn't have enough family history, and try as we might, couldn't get it either. So the next best thing for us will be to help by donating anything we don't use to research. That way we still get to pay something back.

Good to hear you're on track. We might not be too far behind you it seems. Have been in touch with our clinic and due to my period going AWOL we are looking to induce it beginning of next month so fingers crossed ET should be end of the month. 

Would be great to keep in touch in the meantime though. We are using The Agora in Hove (Sussex) although we live in Wiltshire! How about you? 

Exciting but scary times ahead. Roll on your day 20! Take care x


----------



## Herts85

Just wanted to pop in and say hello, lots of new people on here!

I'm currently recovering from hysteroscopy, lap and dye yesterday. Not good news, tubes are buggered possibly due to abdominal surgery as a child although there was also an ovarian cyst that had to be removed, an endometrium and endometriosis that was treated and fibroids in my uterus which was also discovered to be retroverted!! 

Have an appointment with the consultant later in the week but feeling pretty down heartened right now 

Herts x


----------



## Pinkchick

Hi Herts, I'm sorry that it wasn't good news from your procedures. Hopefully when you see the consultant they will be able to talk through what your options are. I Hope you are recovering physically and not too sore. 
Sending hugs your way


----------



## Herts85

Thanks Pinkchick,

I hope you have better luck with your treatment this time. x


----------



## ladybird83

Hi guys!

I'm currently DR for my first IVF cycle. We have a DD who is 4, which my DW carried.

Ask - your post really hit home for me as I felt exactly the same during my fourth DIUI cycle. My DW got pregnant on our first DIUI after having cysts removed and I thought it would be the same for me. I found it really hard to think positively through the whole process and as a result saw IVF as the beginning of the end. I was going a bit loopy with all the negative thoughts and disappointment TBH, which is not like me as I would consider myself to be quite a strong person. I have had hypnotherapy to help change my outlook and that's been helpful. I'm also having acupuncture now which is making me feel more balanced and calm. Perhaps you can look into some alternative stuff that might work for you? I found IUI to be a constant roller coaster of ups and downs in very quick succession and really think the stress I put myself under didn't do me any favours. I'm in a similar situation to you in that we have no LGBT friends to talk to about our fertility journey and I'm not telling anyone I'm having treatment as I can't deal with the expectations. Happy to keep chatting if you feel like it


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi, how is everyone doing? Herts, hope you are well on the road to recovery now and feeling more positive. How did your appointment with your consultant go?

Hi ladybird, cycle buddy! I don't have any LGBT friends to talk about my cycle with, and we haven't told many people this time.


----------



## Herts85

Good Evening All,

I hope things are going well in everyone's cycles!

Sarah - Are you now on your 2ww? Fingers crossed for you!! The consultant was actually great, he has referred us for IVF as my tubes are unlikely to support anything else. We're desperately trying to pick our clinic so the funding can be finalised asap. I have a big birthday in July then we're both bridesmaids for a really close friend (who is 4 months pregnant!) on Aug 2nd so we're hoping to be in a position to cycle around Aug/Sept - very exciting even though I have moments of 'Argh this is huge, can I do it!'

Herts x


----------



## sarahsuperdork

That's great news Herts, my consultant did the same for us and we were lucky enough to have one funded IVF cycle because of my damaged tubes. Fingers crossed for you! 

I'm still waiting to start treatment argh I have a cyst that has been too big for the last 6 weeks so I'm waiting on AF again to see if I can cycle this month.


----------



## Herts85

Aww and that resulted in your little one? How lovely! We're really lucky and get 2 cycles or a maximum of 4 transfers depending on the situation with frosties. That was actually only changed in the last year from 3 cycles!

I'm finding the whole process a little frustrating, I think there is a massive amount of everyday homophobia in fertility services but it's even worse when you add fertility problems into the mix. I've had to be on the defensive a few times and point out that my issues are more than simply lack of sperm, even with a friend 

That sucks about your cyst, it's crazy how little control we have over 'making babies'. It makes you wonder how anyone manages it! Are you using the same sperm donor as your little boy?

Herts x


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Yes, we were first time (very) lucky! Hard to dare to believe we could be second time lucky so I'm finding this upcoming cycle more stressful than the first to be honest.

Two cycles is great; I'd have had one fresh cycle plus any resulting frosties under our CCG. Thankfully we just needed the one fresh so we're now self-funding our FET. No need to worry about a donor because we have three frosties waiting for us so they're full siblings with our DS.

It's definitely frustrating. Our first consultant, shortly before I had a blocked tube removed, told us we could 'try a few times ourselves at home first' and suggested we find a donor online.  Thankfully he was a locum and when he left, we were referred to a fab consultant who took out my tube and secured us funding. There are good ones out there, it's just a shame they're not all so good! And don't get me started on the 'if your fertility is so crap, why doesn't the other one carry the baby?'


----------



## Ask1980

Hi Ladybird - thanks for your post! I was having acupuncture and loved it but it's soooo expensive up here and I've just given up my job so I can give 110% to the IUI so it's trying to find things on a budget! I do yoga daily from a YT video and also some meditation which I find beneficial and calming! Would be great to chat to you feel free to Dm!


----------



## Herts85

Sarah - Had to laugh at parts of your post, it really rings true! I always knew there was a good chance of issues with me and was thinking DP could be a 'back up' but it turns out she is possible worst then me in terms of fertility! I did joke that perhaps this is why we got together, no point in wasting good fertility on us when we can't spontaneously conceive! Great news about your frosties, you could have your own 5 a side team! 

It is so true about the consultant/professionals, there are so many good ones but the bad ones really stand out given it is already an emotionally heightened situation then they make it a million times worse! xx

I am currently trying to book onto visits/open days at all the clinics we have to choose from (apart from one which we've already ruled out) whilst trying to prepare for a hen weekend next week, Glastbonbury at the end of the month, my "21st"  birthday celebrations in July and two weddings also in July! Life is definitely feeling very full on!

Hope everyone is good, FX for anyone currently in treatment, Sarah - hope your cyst decides to do one so that you can put your emby back where it belongs! 

xx


----------



## weetbix kid_2015

Hello all, I have just posted in FF newbie thread but thought I should post here to share my story.

After months of stalking the FF forum I have finally built up the courage to introduce myself.

I'm a 35yr F married for almost 8yrs to a 41yr F.  Our family planning started back in 2008 where my partner ttc with IVF at LWC using donor sperm.  After almost 3 yrs of no luck we decided to have a break and change clinics. During this break we were introduced through friends to an amazing man who would go on to be our donor and long story short, tried AI @ home and 2nd try   We have a gorgeous 4yr son who is desperate for a sibling. 

Fastward to 2015, now its my turn   I've been trying AI @ home with the same donor for the past 8 months with no luck.  

I've had a fertility MOT partly with City (Gennet) Fertility and the NHS.  

2010 PCO but not PCOS - LWC
2014 no sign of PCO/PCOS, Luteal Phase Defect – Gennet
2015 PCOS, L ovary adhering to uterus  - NHS
2015 No sign of ovary adhering to uterus, good Ovarian reserve, prescribed clomid & progesterone – Gennet
Aug 2015 – Hysteroscopy booked. 

So frustrating!!!!

We are currently researching the IVF route again using our donor at clinics here in the UK and in Europe and I need to gather a bit more info before we can make a decision.

**I need help with finding lesbian/single women who have successfully used a known donor here in the UK and in Europe, in particular Greece, Hungary and Czech Republic.  

**And I have also heard that IVF clinics here in the UK make you wait 6 months  before treatment if you use a known donor, is this right?

Oh its so confusing & giving me a headache just thinking about it. 

Any info would be helpful and much appreciated.

Thanks,
2Mamaz


----------



## HelenC-G

Hi All

I was wondering if anybody had an experience of IUI treatment at an NHS clinic. My wife and I have our final appointment on 29 June to decide our course of treatment and as everything seems ok, we think it will be IUI they recommend.

Any ideas if this is the case, what drugs the NHS will pay for or if not, the cost of these?


----------



## Elerifairy

Hi HelenC-G we were lucky enough to get funded for 3 rounds unmedicated iui by the NHS and are having our treatment at Care Nottingham. Everything is covered up to the point of a positive test - so for example if they had put us on progesterone pessaries we would have to pay for them after a bfp.
We are just starting out first cycle this week with iui scheduled for tomorrow, so can't comment on how well it will work yet but with no fertility issues its been very straight forward!
We have had a long wait for a cmv negative donor (about 7 months!) but this cycle called up day 1 had a scan day 8, back on day 9 and did a trigger shot that evening , going in for "basting" 42hrs later  it's all been very straightforward and stress free!


----------



## HelenC-G

Thanks Elerifairy that is really helpful! I think we may have missed the boat re funding but the other info is useful to know. We are in London so seem to have a lot of options re donors.


----------



## BroodyChick

Seen you've not been online for a while but just wanted to quickly reply that up to your 36th birthday you still qualify for free IVF as an egg sharer with many private clinics, and my clinic didn't stipulate any quarantine for my donor (we presented as a co-parenting, 'non sexual' couple).
Best of luck!


----------



## Herts85

Hi everyone,

Hope your tic journeys are going well!

2mamaz - we looked at known donor but if both female parents want to be legal parents then the known donor has to go through all the same testing as an anonymous donor (including 6 months or so quarantine for HIV) and you have to pay the costs of all of the testing etc. It seemed to be coming in around the £4k mark so we decided against it!  

HelenC-G - I hope your appt went well, did you get the treatment plan you expected? We were unlucky enough to have fertility 'issues' but lucky in that we are now about to be approved for two funded IVF cycles. Despite asking the recommended people we are still nonethewiser regarding sperm donors, no one really seems to have a clue!

Elerfairy - hope your treatment went well? When does the CMV testing take place and does it take long to get the results? I think it is the one test I haven't yet had!

Sarahsuperdork - I saw your fet wasn't sucessful, big hugs and I hope the upcoming one is a big success for you!

Herts x


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Thanks Herts, hope everything is going well for you. Just waiting for AF now so we can try again with our last two frosties, fingers crossed.


----------



## MadameCissy

Hi everyone,

Just thought I'd poke my head back in here. I've seen some new names in here with people starting out on their journey. I don't know if any of you are on ******** but there's a LGBT fertility friends group there (completely secret so none of your friends can see it). Loads of ladies in there, some still going through treatment and others with kids. I'm in there myself and it's an amazing group. Loads of advice, help and support. If anyone feels like they want to join, send me a PM. X


----------



## Herts85

Found out today that while we've been waiting patiently for the last two weeks believing things to be progressing they've actually being going nowhere fast. Our consultant's secretary forgot to pass the information onto the coordinator! Grrrr! 

Hope things are going better for everyone else! 

Herts x


----------



## Ask1980

Herts85 Oh no! That's not good! how frustrating!! I really hope they hurry things along now!


----------



## Herts85

Thanks Ask, me too! I don't mind waiting when things are progressing (ok that's a little fib, even then it's quite frustrating!) but for there to be nothing happening due to miscommunication/lack of communication is unbearable!

I already having a sneaking suspicion I will be terrible in the 2ww!

Fingers crossed for you, hoping you get a huge BFP this time!

Herts x


----------



## robin83

Hi guys,

I'm completely new to this site. My partner and I have been trying for a baby for two years. For 18 months we used a known donor with no success, we had our first cycle of privately funded IUI last month, which did not work. We are now moving on to IVF - which I am feeling very apprehensive about. Anyway, it's really only close family and friends that know about our struggle to get pregnant, so I suppose I'm here to chat to people that are in the same boat!


----------



## Ask1980

Hi Robin83 and welcome! My family don't even know me and my DW are trying only a couple of close friends!!! So this site has become a saviour! I wish you all the best


----------



## sarahsuperdork

Hi robin, good luck with your upcoming IVF, when do you plan to start?

Hope things move more quickly for you now Herts, what a pain!

Ask, how are you doing?

AFM still waiting to start our second FET, AF is now 13(!) days late so I'm hoping it won't be much longer now.


----------



## Ask1980

Hi Sarahsuperdork, well I think IUI#6 has just failed as got another bfn   so now onto my last 2 medicated cycles. I was so positive this time too


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## Herts85

Hi Robin, this is a fab bunch of people. Very few people know that we are on the fertility route so it's great to have the support, encouragement and sympathies of this great bunch   

Ask - sorry to hear about your bfn  

Sarah I can't believe you're still waiting for af, shall I do some sort of menstrual rain dance for you?  

Everyone else I hope your journeys are progressing well and that 2016 brings lots of rainbow babies for this board  

Herts x


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## J_W

Hey everyone. I'm new to this forum but thought I would say hi!
I am one of a (soon-to-be married) couple living in the North East. We are in the early stages of family planning, have researched quite a lot but haven't actually done anything yet. We hope to be married before we get pregnant and our wedding isn't until late next year so we are looking in to starting the process pretty soon. From some of the posts I have read it seems sensible to at least get the ball rolling so we know where we stand.
This is a really friendly, helpful forum.


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## sarahsuperdork

Thanks for the rain dance Herts, it worked.  tomorrow will be downreg day 1, officially back on the wagon.

Hi JW, welcome.


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## Little_Pea

Just an update. DP and I are are just completing blood tests for what will hope will be a sibling for our gorgeous 7 month old son. IVF for me including egg sharing to another

Exciting. X


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## Herts85

Hi J_W - I think it's worth finding out now where you stand, a basic fertility check/MOT will rule out any underlying fertility issues. It's really about making an informed decision. There is a lot of advice and support here so you'll soon be an expert  

Yay Sarah, glad my (very bad) dancing was good for something   

Little_Pea - I hope you get the results you need, exciting times!

I had a call today from the fertility clinic saying they had our referral which was fine but they couldn't book our first appointment as we're missing a blood test! Arghhhh, as if there hasn't been enough done already!  

Herts x


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## J_W

Thanks Herts85, I'm hoping that we have left a lot of time for preparation as we don't want to get pregnant until after are married late next year. This site has been great already and has answered lots of questions I had already which I will share on my blog.

Thanks and good luck everyone. I think I will be here for a long time so hope to follow your journeys.


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## P&amp;M

Hey there

I'm new to site never posted before but have read a few things. My partner and myself are looking into starting a family but we don't know where to start. We have contacted GCRM Belfast and went to open nite but didn't clear up much for us. We have a big holiday planned then we aim to register and start ball rolling at a clinic. Anyone recommend one in Belfast?

Also if we aren't married how does that work legally through a clinic?

Thanks do much.


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## Herts85

Hi P&M,

Your first step really would be to get your fertility checked out (both if you both want to carry a child).

Me and my girlfriend are fairly young in fertility terms but always knew I had problems, as it turns out so does she. Depending on whether any issues are picked up some treatments will be recommended over others for you. For example if you have any tubal issues IUI would not be recommended it would be straight to IVF.

In terms of legal parentage, if you are in a same sex relationship but not married/CP'd then providing you are treated through a HFEA licensed clinic you can both be the legal parents from day 1 (birth certificate, antenatal appts, parental leave etc). You just both need to complete forms at the clinic to say you consent to it.

I don't know anything about clinics in Belfast but would reccomend the HFEA website for success rates.

Herts x


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## sarahsuperdork

Hiya P&M, Herts is spot on. Try to get as much testing done as you can on the NHS; some GPs are more understanding than others. Your GP can then refer you to a private clinic of your choice once you know where you're at.


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## Herts85

Happy New Year everyone!!

Here's hoping that 2016 brings us all BFP's and babies in our arms   

Herts x


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## KDJay

Happy new year to you too herts85! Xxx


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## Pinkchick

Happy new year to you all, and hoping your dreams come true in 2016 xx


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## poppy05

Happy new year to you all xx


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## Swimbikerun

Hi All

After a 18 months of stop start IUI (for multiple reasons) my wife and are are heading down the IVF route this year. Well, technically, we started on it at the end of last year...I swear to god my brain has fallen out or has created a mental block on remembering any of the conversations we have at the clinic.


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## KDJay

Hey swimbikerun - welcome! come over to the LGBT cycle buddies thread we have a nice group of ppl over there! xxxx


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## Swimbikerun

KDJay said:


> Hey swimbikerun - welcome! come over to the LGBT cycle buddies thread we have a nice group of ppl over there! xxxx


Hey KDJay

I have now been over to the aforementioned LGBT thread, I need all the help I can get at the moment! I want my wife to have a good pregnancy (like I had) and for things to go as smoothly as possible.


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## mamatobe2017

Hey all!

Totally new on here - looking for advice, answers and laughs! 

My wife and I have our 1st appointment at Homerton Hospital next month for IVF. I just wondered if anyone knew the procedures and timelines etc once consultation at fertility clinic is done? Blood tests were carried out by our GP already and all is normal so he says. 

Any general advice from experience would be amazing!

Thanks in advance


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## SillyWrong

hi Kym!  You should head over to the 2016 cycle buddies page, loads of lovely people on there to chat with! 

In terms of timelines, having seen how timelines differ so much for different ladies it would be almost impossible to say.  Technically - once you have all your bloods done (not sure if your GP would have done all needed for IVF?) you're good to go, it's just about getting the right point of your cycle in order to start the meds.  If you do 'Long Protocol' (most clinics do) then you start on day 21 of your cycle, Short protocol is Day 2.  I mean, if you have all the right tests done already then technically you could get started right away - though it's rare to happen that quick. 

You can have a look at my full timeline on my blog (linked below) if you want, we had unexpected delays.


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## Perpetualwanderer

Hi all! My wife and I were married in March 2015, however we were well into the TTC journey at this point! 

We started IVF  in March 2014, though had begun the process in late 2013. We have been though 4  IVF cyes via egg donation, we had 2 share all and 2 keep all cycles, one of which was a chemical pregnancy and the other a BFN. Now too old for egg share   so self funding IUI with donor sperm. Had a medicated IUI cycle last November with a BFN, and now on the second medicated IUI with clomid. Currently 3DPIUI and enjoying (not) the lovely side effects of cyclogest (hello cramping, bloating and sore breasts!) test day is 18th of feb, though I normally don't need to test as AF will always arrive on test day  

Sending you alla big LGBT hello! X


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## sarahsuperdork

Good luck for OTD, AJHG!


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## SillyWrong

Hi AJHG - good luck for OTD!!


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## Perpetualwanderer

Thank you SillyWrong & Sarah. 5DPIUI. Time moves so slowly in the 2WW!


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## KDJay

Hi AJH - congrats on being pupo. I found the 2ww sooo much worse during our iui than our ivf so i feel for you!


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## singular1231

I'm totally knew to this site and not sure how it all works but currently started a cycle of IVF. After two failed iui's. No fertility problems known as I'm in a lesbian marriage  Iv used this site so many times for information AND always found it great .


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## KDJay

welcome singular and congrats on getting started! we have a really nice group of ladies over on the LGBT cycle thread (soon to be renamed) so come and join us over there and AJHG!


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## Herts85

Hi AJHG - I think you're 11dpIUI now? Hope everything is going well and good luck for test day!   X

Hi Singular1231 - hope it's all going well x

As KDJay mentioned there's a bunch of us talking on the LGBT journey to parenthood thread, feel free to come join  

Herts x


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## Delta

Hello does anyone have experience of going through IVF fertility treatment with a friend? I am a gay man, my friend is straight. We will have to use donor eggs due to my friend having a very low % chance of conceiving. Attempts at IVF have not been successful in the past so we need to go through donor eggs. Have no clue where to start. Do the clinics abroad require you to be married?

Dave


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## BroodyChick

Hi Dave, I have two straight female friends who are co-parenting with male friends, one gay (baby is now 1 and lives with mum mostly), one straight (female friend currently pregnant with donor eggs).
I also used a known donor and went via clinic. Where are you having treatment and what do you need to know?
In the UK you don't have to be married. You can be considered as 'non-sexual' couple to get around the 6 month quarantine regulation for sperm donors.


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## Bee0709

Hi just looking for some help. Sorry if it's too much information. My gf and I had an ivf cycle  the very end of January. 2 embryos were pt in. I had very bad pain a few days before we should of tested and then began bleeding heavily the day before the test. I passed what we assumed were the embryos. I tested negative the following day. I've had my normal periods since but this cycle I am late by 10 days. I have always been regular. Is there any reason anyone can think of for this. Thank you for reading. X


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## poppy05

Hello Bee0709


My cycles always went haywire after tx, infact my body took about a year to get back to normal after my last round of ivf, i would say what you are experiencing is normal, but if you have any concerns then just give your clinic a call to put your mind at ease.   


poppy xx


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## anicca79

Hello everyone, I’m sort of a newbie as not been on here for three whole years. How is everyone doing?


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## Herts85

Hi Annicca,

Sounds like you e had a bit of a journey! I think a lot of people have moved off this board onto the blue social media site in private groups but there is a bit of a chat thread still going called 'journey to parenthood and beyond'

If you'd like to join the private group pm me and I'll send you the details 

Herts x


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## rottencrown

Hi! I'm new here.. we are few weeks away from our first home insemination with my gf. Under here is our blog that we just started so feel free to check it out, it's both in finnish and english


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## rennestone

Hi to all, this is such a great forum I have been navigating a little bit, and there is so many good tips and information


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## kabuk1

Hi everyone. My wife and I are ttc. We started off with a known donor and her trying, but the schedules always clashed, which was stressful, and now things have picked up at work and it's not a good time for her, so 3 months after she last tried (we managed 1.5 tries in 6 months - the half being only 1 insemination as he cancelled the 2nd for that cycle, I'd decided I'd give it a go. I've always wanted kids, but I never pictured myself pregnant, so it took a bit of time to come to terms with that. Now I'm excited about it!

We have just started ttc again. We are now using a non-anonymous donor from cryos and doing home insemination. We just inseminated today and will do so again tomorrow. I know it's a long shot, but fingers crossed that this first try works!


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## IonaBrown

Hi all. My wife and I have our first fertility appointment at the beginning of October at Liverpool Women's Hospital. These are our first attempts so we are very excited. Has any one else here had treatment there?


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## Herts85

Hi Iona,

We're London based so no experience of that hospital. Is it for general fertility investigations or an IVF referral? 

Herts x


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## IonaBrown

IVF referral


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## sarahsuperdork

Congratulations kabuk, just seen your signature!

Hi Iona, good luck to you both. No experience of Liverpool Women's but hope it goes well for you.


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## Herts85

Iona - will this be the beginning of your IVF cycling? If so then they will probably check your bloods, do a scan and discuss your treatment plan with you. Be prepared to complete a million forms! 

Good luck! 

Herts X


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## kabuk1

Thanks, Sarah. You haven't got much longer to go I see. Best wishes!

Good luck Iona!


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## deafmich

Hello!

We are new here and are a lesbian couple and are looking to start a family. I'm 36 and have had fertility tests done last year which showed that I have one blocked Fallopian tube, but otherwise healthy. I just had an AMH test done and am awaiting results. We went for an consultation at the LWC a few weeks ago and were recommended IVF as it has a 55% success rate and IUI has only 5-10% success rate with my blocked tube. A friend had IVF done in Spain after years trying in Ireland and was successful after 1st attempt and was raving about it. Now - I would go abroad if the success rates were better than the UK - but I cant see clear evidence through online searching. And another factor that may stop me going abroad is that I'm a teacher so wont be able to take 10 days off work for IVF treatment abroad like my Irish friend had done. Is that true - it will last more than a week?

I found this article online about IUI v IVF ( http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3176541/The-cut-price-fertility-boost-childless-couples-not-told-IUI-versus-IVF-comes-profit-margins-say-doctors.html) was wondering if it's true but I'd rather spend more money on IVF ( we have saved enough money for it) than wasting money on IUI especially when I have to factor in my age of 36.

Any help will be great- thanks!!!

/links


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## Pinkchick

Hi deafmich, 
As you can see from my signature I went through several treatments. Iui can be successful for lots of ladies but if I was to do this again I Would go straight to IVF-yes it's more expensive but the success rates are so much higher.
A cycle of treatment can last several weeks from beginning to end and involves lots of visits to hospital for bloods and scans but that's the same if your going through iui or IVF. 
You would be entitled to time off work for appointments but that would probably involve you telling your boss your undergoing treatment. The other alternative would be trying to time it for when your on holiday but this could be tricky because it takes a lot of work To get the timing right for treatment. 
Are you going through a private clinic? Lots of areas same sex couples are entitled to treatment on the NHS.
We had treatment through the NHS and were entitled to the same as heterosexual couples. You might already have looked into this. Treatment abroad often does work out cheaper,that was going to be our next step if the last one had not worked, but that would be a challenge also with your job. Wishing you lots of luck. x


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## bk2013

hi there
didn't want to read and run.
we are a same-sex couple too.
we are in a different situation as i have no known fertility issues apart from my age (almost 40) so now we are using donated embryos.
but we did initially have 2 cycles using OE.

we have had treatment abroad for all of our cycles due to the cost in the UK.

i do believe that IUI success rates are significantly lower than IVF.  

in the UK clinics have to publish their success rates because they are monitored by the HFEA. Most clinics abroad do not have to publish their success rates.

however if you are looking at clinics abroad you can contact them and ask them about their success rates and i am sure they will let you know.  there are boards on this forum linked to other country's clinics with lots of people who have used clinics abroad.  lots of people will be able to advise about clinics abroad and give their honest opinions about them.

not sure if this is of any help.

good luck xx


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## Leasam

Hi everyone 

New to this site a friend pointed me here to get advice and support ect me and my girlfriend are starting the process next year and are just looking at the different options, we both want to carry (not at the same time haha). she is going first and we have found a place if we donate our eggs we receive Ivf free which we thought would be nice to do. Has anyone done this before or living in North East area can give advice on this 😊


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## poppy05

Welcome leasam
Good luck to you both with your journey to motherhood  
I am going to leave you the link to the egg share area, plenty of our LGBT ladies have egg shared, myself included, but you may find lots of useful info over on the egg share board.
Just click on the link

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=15.0

poppy xx


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## ItsOnlyAimee

Hi all,

I'm knew around here and eager to hear the stories of similar couples.

My wife and I have been trying to get referred through our GP for almost two years. We got married in September and have since tried one home insemination with donor sperm from a clinic in Denmark. This was sadly unsuccessful. Since then we've had blood tests at the GP to progress our referral. Results of this have been that I have no immunity to rubella and no signs of ovulation on Day 21 test. I've had my repeat MMR jab a month ago and repeat the blood test for rubella on Friday. Due to the progesterone test, our GP is now referring us with 'fertility issues' rather than a 'need help getting it in the right place' referral. I also have endometriosis and a retroverted uterus to complicate matters further.

What is everyone's experience of being referred by their GP?

Thanks,

Aimee


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## Herts85

Hi Aimee,

I seem quite similar to you - endometriosis, refrigerated uterus, sluggish tubes and adhesions. Weirdly I'm also low on rubella immunity. 

I also have PCO/S but do ovulate regularly. We first went to GP in sept 14, had our first fertility appt Dec 14, lots of testing then had funding approved July 15, various delays with funding/clinic then our first IVF cycle was July 16. 

Whereabouts are you? I believe it varies a lot across the country.

Herts x


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## sarahsuperdork

Our GP was fab; while I 'passed' the bloods (bar an elevated prolactin level) she also referred me for a laparoscopy on the NHS to check my tubes were clear. They weren't, so I was passed on to a consultant and had one removed. Our consultant then secured us NHS IVF funding on the basis that I have known fertility issues (despite never TTC) and we had our treatment through the same hospital. 

Ultimately our GP got the ball rolling and our consultant continued the process for us; we were very lucky to have them. Hope it runs as smoothly for you too!


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## Leasam

Hi everyone I'm new we live in the north east and are looking at starting a family and just wanting some advice in terms of best clinics and best places for donors, unsure weather to try home insemination first to see if it works once. It just sounds like so much money we are unsure what the best way to go about it x


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## kabuk1

Leasam said:


> Hi everyone I'm new we live in the north east and are looking at starting a family and just wanting some advice in terms of best clinics and best places for donors, unsure weather to try home insemination first to see if it works once. It just sounds like so much money we are unsure what the best way to go about it x


It depends on your circumstances. My wife and I have no known fertility issues, bur neither of us have gone through a complete workup either. We decided to go for home insemination first. We started on Pride Angel and found a known donor and started trying that way. However, scheduling conflicts that led to repeated cancellations and only 1 try in 6 months resulted in us changing direction a bit and using Cryos. We were lucky and I managed to get pregnant first try. I'm now eager for this little man to arrive (currently 37+2). We still have 6 straws reserved for my wife to try. Hopefully it will be rather easy for her too, but it did take her mum time to get pregnant and one of her cousins has had fertility issues, so we'll see. But we'll give it the 3 tries we have left before changing direction. As our donor doesn't meet UK reg, we'd have to go straight to IVF for timing purposes as we'll have to travel to Denmark or the Netherlands for treatment. Denmark would make things easier on the delivery front where the Netherlands would make things easier as she's Dutch and we have places to stay in various locations, so no cost of accommodation. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

My best friend and her wife had to go the clinic route. Her wife was 36 with fertility issues. They ended up with a referral that meant they paid for 3 IUIs, all of which failed, but then got two IVF treatments free. One of those resulted in a pregnancy, but she miscarried. They had to pay for the 3rd IVF treatment, but they now have beautiful 10.5 month old twin girls. My best friend is no pregnant and due in Aug. She had success on her second IUI, but she has no fertility issues.

The key thing to remember is to do as much research as possible, but to keep your own circumstances in mind. A clinic isn't always needed, and even with a clinic, a medicated attempt isn't always needed. Good luck.


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## P123

Hi everyone. New on here but about to start drugs for my first (and only ) ivf after 4 failed iui’s with anon donor. Very nervous about the procedure and huge amount of stress as it really is the end of the road if it doesn’t work.


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## anicca79

P123 said:


> Hi everyone. New on here but about to start drugs for my first (and only ) ivf after 4 failed iui's with anon donor. Very nervous about the procedure and huge amount of stress as it really is the end of the road if it doesn't work.


Best of luck P123. Wanted to say have faith. We had one cycle of IVF and only two viable embryos. I am 38. I have birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl. You only need one! Good luck x


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## P123

That’s so lovely, thank you! I take great hope from that as I am 38 now too.


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## Stace91

Hi all, newbie here.

Me and my partner are starting our baby journey. We recently had appointments with our GP in hopes of a referral to ACU. After initial blood tests my 21 day reault came back with a low progesterone level (2.4) 
I had the blood test re-done today with hopes of a better result. Has anyone else had this problem? 
I hope this post makes sense! Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings!


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## P123

Hi there. Welcome!
My progesterone levels weren’t measured - that’s not the same as AMH is it?


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## LadyMac2019

Hi All

I'm not that much of a newbie I joined earlier this year! I started treatment at 32 with IUI. I'm 34 next month and starting IVF number 2 at the same NHS Clinic. Fingers crossed!...DW will be getting roped into treatment at this rate!


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## leeloupix

Hello, 
It’s been a while since I have been on here, we decided to have another round of IVF and currently 16 weeks pregnant 😊


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