# What age to tell the Child?



## Hope297 (Feb 21, 2008)

Hi

Sorry I know this must have been asked before but a search brings up so many unrelated posts.
My DS is now 2 and was conceived via a donor and I wonder what age realistically I should start to tell him? I know its "as early as possible" but he is only just learning to speak and wouldn't have a clue and is only interested in books with tractors and wheels!. What age did you start to talk to your child about using donor egg or sperm?

Thankx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥ (Apr 10, 2008)

If you get the book from DCN and start reading it to him then it will start to sink in as time goes by. We've done it since he was born. He knows the story now and knows its his story but obviously the penny hasn't dropped yet.


----------



## Jacobsmum (Feb 23, 2013)

Hi Hope
my little one has similar interests - trains, tractors, diggers.... I am still planning to do a photobook just for him, which may wall have to feature a lot of transport to gain his interest, but got the DCN book (not quite perfect for our situation, as it's single mum, donor sperm and we used double donor, but I just add in an extra bit (he can't read yet!)). He likes the fact that it is '*Our* Story'. I mainly got the book because a friend with a little one similar age has an older sibling, and she (the older sib) kept asking questions. She thinks the book is excellent, and because she's a bit older that has made it more interesting and attractive to him (despite the dearth of vehicles, dragons or dinosaurs...).
I first told him the first night we were on our own - after the hospital bit, and after my parents had left - I think it was nine or ten days. I made it part of our bedtime routine for a while, so I could get used to/ happy with the words (before I had someone interrupting/ answering back!).
He's now nearly two and a half, and starting to be interested in relationships - whose mummy is that? etc. He might be wanting information earlier because I am a single mum, so there is the obvious lack of a dad to explain, but he doesn't really ask questions and I don't think he really understands the story much at all yet.

Good luck with it all.
Jacob's mum x


----------



## Tiny21 (Jul 24, 2007)

I can't remember when we first told our son but we tried to keep it low key, we did till him quite early on, he was a good speaker from fairly early so could ask questions but just listened then went off playing! We haven't mentioned it for a while but think he does know. He knows every time we go to the clinic and know that is how we have to try to have a baby  . I think saying the words earlier helps you too, good luck. Xx


----------

