# Intros postponed can anyone offer any hope



## moobags (Nov 13, 2013)

So intros were due to start Monday and we got a call yesterday to say that they were being postponed as yet again birth mother was saying she was going to appeal.  Now she has been saying this since placement order was granted last December but has so far failed to submit any papers to court.  The legal department st the LA in their infinite wisdom decided yesterday when BM talked of appeal again decided to give her a deadline of next Friday to lodge papers now why wasn't this deadline given sooner ? What happens if she doesn't submit the papers intros go ahead at a later date but then she submits the papers will intros be halted.

Can anyone at all offer any advice help or experience good or bad we just need to know where we stand as at the minute we are completely in the dark and our poor children are left confused and let down having been told they are meeting their new mummy and daddy in three days time.

Thank in advance a very sad Moo


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## becs40 (Apr 9, 2013)

Ah moo sorry to hear that. If I were in your shoes I would be pushing hard to ensure that this is the final delay. BM could go on and on doing this and the LA need to be putting the children first. They need to know you're prepared to still go forward even with the threat of it being contested. Legally I'm fairly certain that she can't contest po once the children have been placed. The only avenue then is to contest the AO.
I'm only speaking from my memory of what I found when we were having similar issues with lo last year.
Also they need to be open and honest with you on what they think the chances of success is for any appeal. If they think none then they should be pushing ahead, if they think there is reasonable grounds then you should be aware of that as it could very well have an impact at the adoption order stage.
Good luck, it's a horrible roller coaster of emotions to go through.


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## moobags (Nov 13, 2013)

Thanks Bec they are trying to get a special order put in place where by if BM appeals intros and placement can still go ahead not sure if that's possible how it would work or even how long it would take to get something like that.

We are completely heartbroken bedroom all done their pics are up on the fridge and dotted around the house we thought matching and ADM being granted would mean that she could only appeal the AO how wrong we were.

DH has had to tell work and say he isn't sure what's happening and when intros will be the ripple effect this causes is not even taken into consideration.

There is no wonder children end up stuck in the system or cases like baby P the legal system is a complete farce placements orders mean jack and the people who abused and neglected their children are given more rights and respect that the children themselves its morally corrupt and wrong.


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Oh moo, I'm so sorry!  (((((hugs)))))  The only advice I would give is to put all of your questions in writing and send them to your SW and your LO's SW.  Get them to give you clear answers, even if the answer is "we don't know yet."

Stay strong.  But be kind to yourself.


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## mafergal (Jul 31, 2013)

I agree with Becs, if they don't think BM's appeal will be upheld then they should be pressing ahead with intros.  BP's need to be given leave to apply for the revocation of the PO as well.  Once the child is placed with you they cannot contest the PO. 

I'm really shocked they would spring this on you today, especially if BM has been threatening this all along.  Chances are placement day would have been and gone before any application was made.  Really feel for you, it's really not acceptable or fair to anyone involved. x


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## Sq9 (Jan 15, 2013)

Sending you huge hugs  . Has the placement order been granted? If it has, I really don't understand why the la are delaying as she's out of time to appeal so would need to seek leave of the court. The placement order does as the name suggests and allows the la to place the child for adoption. BM has no say in that unless she is granted leave to appeal and then the appeal against the care and placement order is successful. A lot of birth parents say they are going to appeal, but few actually do. Sounds like her avenue (which I doubt she will actually do, though may threaten from what you've said) is to seek leave to oppose the adoption order further down the line. I think I'd ask your sw if there's any possibility of you speaking (with sw there) to the la's lawyer and for them to explain to you exactly what the position is. Best of luck


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## moobags (Nov 13, 2013)

If children aren't currently in placement BF can challenge the PO and submit documentation with court to appeal.  BM has indicated she is lodging papers this week which is why LA are trying to get an 'order to place' granted from the court, however we are not sure how long this will take it can't be done as an emergency so just had to go onto the pile in the queue.  Which means if the children are not placed before December parents have the right for a full re assessment as by that point the PO will be one year old.

It's a shambles and a complete mess we can't see them getting the order from court and the children in placement within 10 weeks the time frame is too tight.

We are desperately trying not to lose hope but the reality is that it's game over.

Moo x


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## Forgetmenot (Jun 22, 2010)

Massive hugs moo x you know where I am xx

Maybe try adoptinuk for additional info... Not really sure of all the legal jargon x


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## becs40 (Apr 9, 2013)

Well firstly moobags it's not over yet so hang on in there. Bm may not submit the papers this week for one thing, ours stated she was going to appeal po but didn't.
Regarding timescales I would seriously talk with la regarding them allowing you to fta specifically for these children, this would get them into placement without having to wait for matching panel etc and them then having to reassess the po. I'm certain they would be keen to do this if possible as they're not going to want to have effectively wasted a year and also to keep the children in care for any longer than they really need to.
We had a point in our journey when our sw told us we need to move on and look at other profiles, we didn't and stuck at it and little man came home 7 weeks later.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

I'd ask to meet the la legal department asap to ask all questions etc with your sw their sw and head of their SW's team.  With every question answered if not directly obvious then follow up with and in what is being done to ensure that the children's rights are at the centre of the decision not just bm ? Just politely calmly and completely respectfully.  

We had intros delayed because bm didn't answer the phone to SW's for them to tell her it was final contact so despite leaving a voice mail so bm knew and thought it was they arranged another one for a month later.  We had intros delayed by five weeks which was so devastating I had to alter my leave date at work etc really last minute.  People started asking me if it was definitely going ahead which obviously is really upsetting . Eighteen months ago now xxx


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## crazyspaniel (Sep 12, 2012)

My DDs bm applied to appeal the placement order on the day we met dd, no one told us until second day of intros....
Because intros had started we continued and they ended up lasting just over 3 weeks. The judge heard the case as quickly as he could as he was sure there would not be sufficient evidence to stop placemement. 
It was a really worrying time despite everyone saying it would be fine, not the best start for any of us. Good luck, I really feel for you xx


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## moobags (Nov 13, 2013)

Thanks crazy spaniel feel like such a fool we told family friends all bedroom is ready etc etc history should have told me to not get ahead of myself x


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