# Adopted Children Names



## Lovely Lamb (Mar 11, 2008)

Hi Everyone

I've been wondering about the situation with children and their names....

If a child(ren) has been taken into care against their birth parents' wishes, is anything recommended about changing their names? I just thought that it leaves them vulnerable to being traced....especially with some of the names that particularly stand out. I know birth parents' aren't given their new address or surname, but if you're adopting from within the area, it doesn't take much for one person to tell another person, who may tell another person etc....

On the one hand I would be nervous about that, on the other hand I'm sure changing the name is cruel if the child's identity/name are heavily interlinked. 

Is this something that is discussed with SW's along the way? 

What experiences does everyone have on this.

Thanks for your help....I'm a long way off being at this stage, but still curious.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi hun, ss don't like you to change a childs name unless there are good reasons but if a child had very unusal or strange name and could be easily traced by the bf then i think they would support you in changing it  i'm sure your sw will go through all this with you in more depth hun 

pam xx


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## ♥ M J ♥ (Apr 17, 2004)

Hi

Like Pam says SS dont like you chaning the childrens names however they will let you amend the spelling if the child doesnt know how to spell it

both of our children have unusal names however we dont worry to much as when you are matched SS tae into account your location in relavance with the birth family

with the name thing you need to remember that this is the only thing the child will keep from birth.

You can add extra names/amend middle name to give your child something from you

xxx


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## am27 (Mar 29, 2006)

hi. 

From my experience working as a social worker, like others have said, a childs name is the only thing they have from their birth and is a large part of their identity.  Social workers do go through all this with you and I think its part of your adoption training/induction.  But when I was working for the local authority plans to change a childs birth name was frowned upon and I recall some cases where it actually went against prospective adoptors with regards to being matched with a child.  It may not be the same in all local authorities but that was the case in my area.  

Anna x


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## ♥ M J ♥ (Apr 17, 2004)

Hi Lambo

I have pmed you

x


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## Anabelle (Nov 6, 2004)

Hi Lambo

We had no choice but to change our DS's name, which I stressed about & still do feel really guilty.

Unfortunately our hand was forced, the f/c had used an entirely different name from birth, and when we tried using his birth name he wasnt responding.  In fact when he had his hearing tests they thought he had a problem as he didnt respond to his name. So we have had to choose a name which moves away from the letter of the alphabet that his  nickname started with.

I have to admit I worried myself silly over this, felt so guilty, and when we told his s/w I dont think she was too pleased.  But at the end of the day, they admitted they totally understood our reasons for doing what we did.

We have kept his first name, just added a middle name and calling him by that.

A
x


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Hi

We also changed our DD birth name.........every one is entitled to their own opinion on what they feel over this subject........we had full backing form SS and changed her name, she was age 9 months.

Andrea


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## ♥ M J ♥ (Apr 17, 2004)

Andrea- totally agree with you- its everyones choice, we did gets asked by FCers if we were changing the childrens - for our 2 it wouldnt have been good for them however we do shortern one of our 2s names down as if out in public i would be noticed if BF where in ear shot of me if i shouted/said they full names

xxx


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Hi MJ

I wouldn't have changed our DS name, he was an older child at nearly 4 and he knew his name, its a name I wouldn't have chosen BUT it really suits him and goes great with our surname.

With DD is was totally different, she was a baby of age 9 months who'd spent most of that time in FC and no one called her by her birth name but pet names.

I can understand why people get upset and say you should keep their birth names, its their identity but like I say every one is entitled to their own opinion.

Andrea
x


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## ♥ M J ♥ (Apr 17, 2004)

Intrestingly i was watching the "wright stuff" this week and they did a segment on it for people who wanted to change birth childrens names and was amazing how many people did want to chane their childrens name

I also learnt that yes you need to reg the birth of your child within 6weeks however you have 12months to reg a name for them! 

xxx


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

lambo - you can always add a middle name of your choice so you get to use your 'dreamed of' names. ..alot of people do
kj x


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