# Camly's diary



## Camly

Hi all

I thought that I would post my story now that I feel we are actually getting somewhere!  

Bit of background first of all - met DH on a girlie holiday on the first night of our holiday. He lived down south and I in Scotland. So after 12 months of only seeing each other every 2nd weekend   DH moved up to live here   We got our own flat after knowing each other for 1 yr & 3 months and got married nearly 2 years ago.  DH had a vasectomy at the request of his first wife as she felt 'her family was complete' with 2 kids. Then... she cheated on him and that was the end of that! I have always known about the vas - the first week infact, when i thought 'ok, steady tiger'!   but Im glad I found out at the very start. No secrets.

Sooooooo.... after about 2 years together we started looking into a vas reversal. REsearched it and found a guy who was supposed to be top notch but cost a fortune! anyway, we arranged to meet with him and decided to go ahead when he said he didnt think there would be any problems and it would work as only been a few years since vas done. After our meeting DH proposed!!     Anyway, long story short... vas rev didnt work - no sperm   also looked at IVF/ICSI with sperm retrieval but that didnt work either.   

We had always talked about adoption and after going thru all we could in order to have a baby, we got in touch with our LA. As you can see from my ticker, its been a long process and we have just started our HS. This is the reason I thought I would start posting a diary.... I will post more of our process later on but thought I would make a start just now. 

Suppose what doesnt kill us will only make us stronger!  

Camly x x x


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## Guest

Nice to read your story and that you are starting to make some progress on your journey to becoming parents.  Hope all continues to go well.  

We're a bit further on, having had three children placed with us nearly 4 months ago, but we are also quite close as we are in a small village 20 miles west of Glasgow. 

Good luck
Bop


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## Camly

hi again

apologies for the delay in updating my diary. sadly one of my best friends son's died on thurs - he was only 4 months old. he was born with 2 holes in his heart and also had downs syndrome.so we are trying to help her as much as possible. heartbreaking.

a little more on my diary.  we had about 4 months to wait for our prep group, which we found daunting but very interesting. it was good to see a whole range of people there. i was the youngest by far, which felt bit weird too (im 30, DH 35). then we had a sw'er visit us at the start of this year. i have had problems with abnormal smears for the past 2 years so when i mentioned this to sw'er, i had to get an early medical. wasnt bothered by this, as i thought it was good to get it out the way. as i thought there were no problems but the sw'er dr wants me to have another medical in april 09. so not sure if that will delay us going to panel or if we do go to panel, delay us being matched? bit annoyed as there is def no problems with my 'bits'   as even my consultant couldnt understand why this would delay matters? anyway, we will face that when it happens.dh has not yet had his medical but again shouldnt see any problems.   

it felt like we waited ages for a sw'er to be allocated. sw was prob sick of my calls and emails etc   but we got our sw'er  and are about to have our 4th visit tomorrow. i find this is abit   as she originally said she wil only see us about 8 times?   she is hoping to get us to a panel date by xmas          

we havent told that many people about our journey as yet - felt that as everyhing else we have done 'baby wise' has failed i dont want to jinx stuff. think and hoping to tell people once we have been approved and then they hopefully wont ask many questions etc? you know what its like, people pestering you for updates, whats next etc.... when you dont really know yourself?  

so thats were we are to date. keep you all posted (thats if anyone is actually reading....)  

x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

looked at my diary yesterday and realised that it was a year to the day that we sent our initial application form away. at the time it seems like a lifetime ago but now things are moving its happened quite quickly.

asked sw'er and she said that we are almost half way thru our hs   ^pom^  august should be when our referrees are contacted. sw'er hoping to get us to panel by end of year   so fingers crossed. 

nothing else happening but will keep you all posted. x x x


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## Camly

hi folks

well just another little update. our referee's have been contacted - had a nosey at the form and there is lots involved in it! think we will owe our ref's a very large drink once they complete the forms!   

next time our sw'er comes she should hopefully meet my step children so that will be interesting!   we have yet to tell the kids so  a little nervous about that too. im sure it will be fine tho.  

keep you posted.

hope everyone is well.  


lots of love camly x x x x


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## Camly

hi readers (  )

not much to report really    apart from me being cheesed off as dh's work said they recd a letter from sw for a reference - we didnt say they could contact our works and they didnt ask?  soooooo... now im worried my work has recd a letter, as anyone opens the mail so half my office - infact prob most of them - will prob know about my private/personal life    also my boss is off on hols at the mo, so dont know who will have the letter.    its not a problem contacting our employees but its just because its just so private. i could have given my boss's home address which would have been easier.....and safer  

but apart from that  , all else is ok'ish.  told a friend we were planning/hoping to adopt - built up to it in a really happy way and she said 'oh thats great - im pregnant again'!  so my news was kinda way laid    not to worry, im over the moon for her and her partner (even if i am a little (lot) jealous....)

looking forward to the day when i can post something exciting and interesting about our journey    

take it easy all x x x x


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## Camly

just thought that i would update from my panic yesterday - sw envelope hasnt been open by anyone in work - its sat in my boss's tray so 'phewwww'.    least i can stop panicking about that. might need to do free overtime to get a good report!!  

x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

off work this week as we have my step kids to stay. they are aged 7 & 10.  also got my nephew (aged 4) for a few days too so its all go. gone from none kids in the house to 3!!! they are good fun tho. we are all having a ball. just puts me in the mood for our own  

told stepkids last night that we were hoping to adopt and they.....................took it brilliantly!! eldest - DD - even told us abit about adoption etc so they are both pretty clued up on it which was good. they both are quite excited, so here's hoping me are not waiting forever  

also spoke to my boss and he said he is posting the form back to social work today so thats another thing out the way.

got sw'er coming tomorrow to meet the kids, my nephew will still be here so it may be doomed already!!!   might need to do lots of bribing tomorrow   

keep you posted.

til next time....  

   x x x x


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## Camly

hi de hi

sw'er met step kids and nephew yesterday. didnt expect it to be just as indepth as it was? stepd is very intelligent so she could answer most of the questions.steps is not just as clever - still good for his age tho. my nephew only said 'bye' -typical as sw'er got up to leave - typical eh?  

kids both said they thought it was 'pretty cool' that we were hoping to adopt so i know we are very lucky. lets just hope we dont have an age to wait?  

wondering how long it will take before sw'er says we are doing to panel?  not that impatient or anything    ...............................  


xx x x x xx x


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## Camly

'ello - if there is anyone there   

had another visit today from sw'er, well dh did. he thinks it went ok?  sw'er said we should be aiming for panel in november, very latest dec which is great!! whoohoooooooooooooo!! fingers crossed. 

dh still has to get his medical which our sw'er is going to chase up so at least we are progressing.

keep you posted.

hope everyone is well.

x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

thought i would post a little update. 

had another sw'er visit yesterday.....it was pretty hard going. felt bit   when she left. not for any one particular reason but just felt everything i said she picked holes in?  not sure if she was doing the bad cop routine to see how commited we are??  dunno but i get the sneaky feeling its going to get harder.....

also dh may have to go away with his work for between 3 - 4 weeks so it looks like we def wont get to a panel in nov.    

sorry for short post just feeling   at the moment.  x x x x


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## Camly

hello

well, we have another visit tomorrow. wonder if its going to be as tough as the last one?  

our sw'er initially said she would have about 8 visits with us, but when she was here last week, it seems we have quite abit more to cover?  we have had approx 6 already?  however, not to worry I know they have lots of things to check etc so we will just need to go with it.  i have never been very good at waiting..... 

hope evreyone is well.  

x x x x


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## Camly

'lo

well we had our visit yest. only lasted an hour so that was quite good. its very intense i think to have it last longer than that, especially since we have visits every week?  

we talked about our support circle etc - didnt realise we had just as many friends and family that we could rely on!! hahahaaa    we have to look at matching profiles for next time so i would imagine when we go to discuss them it will be pretty hard going?  

im finding it very difficult to get excited about the whole process? maybe its just cause im weird?!?   normally i have to tell evryone everything about me but since we have been on the adoption train, i havent really mentioned it to anyone...not sure if its because we have had so many disappointments before that i want to be really sure when i tell folk?  which is really hard for me as i love talking!! soooo...hopefully if/when we get approved, i will be taken an advert out in the paper!!   

im quite a thinker/worrier too which obviously doesnt help. i think this process has made me question a few things about me as a person. which isnt necessarily a bad thing?  god, im getting abit deep here and its tea time!! 

talking about tea time, im away for my dinner.

take care

lots of love camly x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

well we have just had another visit. this time was about our matching preferences. as a lot of folk on here said, what we had ticked sure changed by the time sw'er had left!!   its not til she actually says things out loud you realise what it actually entails? so anyway, thats that bit out the way.  she also dropped into conversation that she thought as a couple 'we had alot to offer' so that made me feel bit better. its difficult isnt it when you dont get any indication as to how she thinks we are doing  

still got a couple of dates in the diary and no mention of any panels. i dont know if we will get there by the end of the year? esp as dh is going away with his work for a few weeks. ho hum! not to worry, waited this blooming long!  

x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

thought i had better update my diary. had a few visits from sw'er. she met some of my family last week so that went quite well. she was here again tonight to talk about us being 'childless'! it wasnt as bad as i was expecting to be honest. soooo... dh has to get his medical but its a difficult one.he was supposed to have it done today but the drs surgery said no appt was made!!    sooooo we are going to have to see if we can get him squeezed in before he goes away with work again on thurs!! sw'er said this may hold things up for us which isnt the best.she is still aiming for a panel in november   but it no medical its not looking good....  fingers crossed tho.so gonna phone the surgery tomorrow and kick butt!!  not happy.also abit   about dh's weight....he gave up smoking when we started adoption process but has put on weight....worried incase this stops us adopting which sw'er said if the report comes back as grossly obese then it could....   aga in, fingers crossed all ok. 

also booked a holiday   going to vegas again - whoohooooo!! cannot wait. least we have something to look forward to.  

hope everyone is well. x x x x


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## Camly

hi all - if there is anyone tthere....  

well dh managed to get the medical done - with abit of help from me!!    anyway, it all went well so fingers crossed the sw'er dr will be ok with its contents too.....prob say about his weight tho...  

had another visit this week.i still might need to get another medical as my last one might be out of date by the time we get to a panel. sw'er didnt mention nov as a panel date but.....dec or jan!! its getting later and later... just wish we had a date seet and then we could start telling people once we   are approved? 

oh well, another week gone so i suppose we are another week closer  

lots of love camly x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

i had a dream last night that we had been lucky enought to adopt and had our kids!! hopefully thats a good sign?

not much else to report. got another visit tomorrow. i think im going to ask if we can get a date organised for panel..fingers crossed she can  give us a date?  

hope everyone is well. x x x x


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## ♥ M J ♥

oh your dream sounds positive!

I know once approved i kept dreaming of having 1girl and 2 boys! well i have one of each however who knows what te future holds for us!

Good luck on getting a panel date

xxx


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## Camly

thanks mj. fingers crossed its a good sign.

had another visit today so sw'er said def go to panel in dec or she will 'be very disappointed'. if everything is all organised - which i dont see happening - then we might be lucky enough to go in november.however, at least we should be there by the end of the year.  

got our health and safety check nex week so not quite sure what thats going to involve?  soon find out eh?  

x x x x


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## Camly

heellooo

just spoke to my MIL and she spoke to our sw'er yesterday. seemingly it went well and she said our sw'er said she couldnt see any probs in us adopting and would be backing us all the way. so thats good!   our sw'er doesnt give much feedback so to hear that was nice 

at least this process has (kinda) made me bit more patient.... well, ok, who am i kidding we have no option but to be patient! hahahaaaa  

love to all x x x x


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## vixie

Hi Camly,

Lovely to read your diary and journey. We've just started, so knowing the frustrations, delays and hassels is very useful. Here's hoping that you get your panel date soon...

Keep writing... 

Vixie


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## Camly

hi vixie

thank you. i have never been a very patient person - dont like waiting     anothevisit on tues so we never know what that could bring? 

good luck with your journey x x x x


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## crazybabe

Hi Camly

How are you getting on with your H/S visits, we had our mid point review last week and both SW's were very impressed with our progress so far, they were also very impressed with our competency folder which is now completed, in fact they took away with them last week as we were told we have done enough I don't wwant to sound big headed, but a lot of hgard work and time went into that  we were aslo informed that we should be going to panel in January as the November panel is fully booked  , we can't wait to be parents after waiting so long, we only got 2/3 visits left now with our H/S, then it;s just another waiting game.  

speak soon

crazybabe


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## Camly

hey crazyb

thats great your sw'er is impressed with you both    our sw'er doesnt give much feedback? so im not sure how she thinks we are doing??    i asked her how many more visits about 3 weeks ago and she said maybe another 1 or 2 - she is coming back on tues and this will be the 3rd one since she said that so....    tbh i havent enjoyed the hs process very much. i appreciate its obviously got to be done etc.  dont know if im just getting bit fed up with it...as i say im not very good at waiting.  (omg, just read this msg back and i sound like a right moan   opps, sorry bout that).

thats great that you will be hopefully going to panel in jan. our sw'er has mentioned november/dec/jan so who knows?  

keep me posted on your progress tho.  x x x


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## Camly

hi de hi all

had our health and safety visit today. it went well, it was actually the first time sw'er looked round our flat. she said it was lovely and spacious which is a good thing? 

still no mention of any panel date?  we go on hol on sat for a week and then the week after we come back our sw'er goes on hol so who knows when the panel will be? 2050 anyone       anyways not to worry, looking forward to going on holiday too much. think we boh need a holiday after the year we have had.  mind you, i know we are luckier than others. not sure if had mentioned but my friend lost her baby boy in july, he was only 18 weeks.  he was born with down syndrome and sadly 2 holes in his heart. he didnt make it thru the surgery after 4 weeks of recuperating.  very very very sad.  well, some good news,  the same friend is pregnant and due next feb so thats at least keeping her busy. 

okies going to go and get organised for vegas baby!!!  


x x x xx


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## Camly

'lo

well back from vegas    but had a fabby do time!  

spoke to some of our friends tonight, sw'er has been in touch with them and arranged times to meet up and discuss us   so least that will be another thing out the way.  we are still hoping to get a panel date in dec - mind you its not been confirmed yet so not sure how long that would take to get sorted?  

still cant shake the whole feeling that everything is goin to go pear shaped?  not sure of any one reason just got a horrible feeling   hope im wrong tho.  x x x x x


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## Camly

howdy!  

nothing to report from us im afraid. sw'er had meeting with our references yesterday, seem to have gone ok but not heard anything from her so   it was ok.

my dh left a msg on sw'er answermachine yest asking for an update....when should we expect visit from head sw'er, confirmation of panel date etc etc but nothing yet.  patience eh?  

hope everyone is well, keep you posted.

love camly x x x x


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## Camly

hellooooo    

well........we have had a call from our sw'er asking if her and the head sw'er can come and see us in 2 weeks time!! whooohooo - well, i hope its whoohhhooooooo! i can only assume this is us heading towards the panel date etc. unfortunately, dh cant make the date so we are gonna have to re-arrange, which i guess will creat problems/delays etc.....  

one step forward.....five steps back....

keep you update x x x x


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## Camly

hiya

well, we have managed to keep the initial appt our sw'er gave us to come with the head sw'er. when i asked dh if she had mentioned anything else he said no (as men do...) then later on this weekend i mentioned something about reading the form f and he said 'sw'er said we might not have enough time to read that'!! hellllooooooooooooo!!! im sure i asked if there was anything else.... and i wonder why its always best to do things yourself..  

sooooo i have posted a thread (thanks to all you lovelies who replied) and have decided to wait til the 5th when the sw'ers come to ask about reading the form f etc. even if it means delaying our panel date...   

ho-hum...nothing is ever straightforward eh?  

x x x x


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## Camly

hiya all

well we have our sw'er and her boss coming to visit tomorrow morning. not that i am a paraniod freak or anything   but now im worried, what if they are coming to tell us that they dont think we are suitable and cant proceed    im really scared. dh says he doesnt think that will happen but you just never know do you?

anyway, we have decided whatever the outcome we are going out for dinner and drinks tomorrow night....least we have that to look forward to.

wonder if i will actually get any sleep tonight....  

lots of love camly x x x


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## crazybabe

Hi Camly

How many H/S visits have you had - we had a visit from our SW and her boss around or 5th visit it is a normal mid view visit to check that your both happy with the assessment so far and happy with your SW and to see if there is anything you need to ask in more detail, any questions you may be wanting answered ask away- our's went really well, thats when they told us we would be ging to panel in January (26th).

hope this helps you feel more confident about tomorrow.

You'll be both fine

Let me know how it goes

crazybabe


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## Camly

well they have been and gone -. sw'er and her boss 1 and a half hours later and i was sat with tears in my eyes....  DH says they were just trying to prepare us for panel but it was hellish!! they asked what we would do if the children didnt settle by the time im planning on going back to work - earliest after 9 months, longest 15 months - i said that financially we would need me to work? they didnt seem to like this answer and said it may have an impact on the panels decision to approve us for siblings? 

she also said we may want to re-asses our matching acceptances - she basically said she thinks we have too many 'maybes' its difficult isnt it? i mean, how do we know til it happens? obviously we know have things which we have said no to but ? ? ? ? ?

feeling really down about it all. at one point i felt like telling them to get out and just to forget it!!! (obviously i dont want this deep down but......)  

panel was mentioned, still not confirmed but not sure when def dont think it will be this year which is abit   but they ho.

mind you when i posted  my thoughts and feelings earlier, the girls on here gave great advice which was much appreciated.

well, hopefully my next post will be more happier.....well, maybe eh?    x x x


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## crazybabe

Hi Camly

Please don't be so down with yourself babes, we were asked the sames questions to, we changed one of our question on the matching panel form too from a no to would discuss - It is difficult as like you said some of the questions they ask us, you think to yourself (how on earth will we know how we feel etc until we have our family) and I used to think to myself, well you have answered honestly but you still wonder if that was the answer they wanted to hear, it feels like their teying to catch us out sometimes but their not they are just doing their job, think positive babes you will be fine, it is difficult I know.

Any questions just ask ok.

hugs

crazybabe


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## Camly

hiya crazy (god that sounds like i should be saying hi to me!  )

thanks for your msg. i think everytime im feeling emotional is due to pmt, maybe i should try and re-arrange our meetings!?  

think i was more upset cause i was hoping this was us nearing the end etc but it certinaly doesnt seem that way.

i really appreciate your comments/messages and wouldnt know what i would do without this website.

big massive    x x x x


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## Camly

thanks lambo

hopefullly im just being a drama queen - dh has mentioned this previously    just gets to you when your trying your best to be a good person etc but hey ho.... hopefully we will get there in the end. 

please keep me posted with your journey also x x x  x xx


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## Camly

lambo! look at my profile - i now have my very own special picture!! thank you thank you. 

things certainly get put into perspective - im just about to go and visit a pregnant friend who is bleeding and has had to go into hospital. (same friend that sadly lost her baby earlier in the year) and here is me moaning at a 'few tough questions'!  

x x x x


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## Camly

lambo, so sorry to hear about your friend. thinking about you and your friend/family.  life can be so cruel sometimes cant it?

my friend was ok'ish when we went to visit. she is hopefully getting a scan tomorrow.  

take care of yourself.

love camly  x x x


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## Guest

Big ((hugs)) as it sounds as though you need some.  

Sorry the last meeting was so stressful - it is a long hard emotional process and to some extent they need to push you to your limits as part of that and it sounds as though they did.  I hope things get a little easier from now.

And of course you are impatient - you want to be a mum and each delay is painful.  

Take care
Bop


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## Camly

thanks for your msg bop.  hopefully things will start to move on....mind you, knowing our luck prob not!! 

i spoke to my boss today and he knows the full stroy. he is very supportive which is good....even got abit of promotion in sept even though he knows we are planning to adopt    so he said that he would try and be as flexible as possible to help me out. whether i go back to work 3 days, 2 days, extra hours etc. he said once the time comes he will try and work something out for me. sooooo thats something off my mind at least.

never easy eh?

anyhooo enjoy your weekend all x x x x x


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## Camly

thought i would update......

had a call from our sw'er to check a couple of things. she asked how we felt wed had gone? dh had said that it was quite tough and she said that it wasnt supposed to be. she was just trying to prepare us and get to know us.  she said that they were both very positive about us and that it would be shown in our form f. we should hopefully get to see the form in the next week or so. we wont be going to a panel in dec - its fully booked    but she is hoping for the start of the year?

another thing that they discussed the other morning was the actual panel. again i dont know if i have been niave about things. seemingly there are 8 people on the panel!!!!   then once our sw'er have had their discussions, we go in and then they 'hopefully' make a recommendation...then it goes to the head head person (dont know what they are called) and then we get a letter to confirm if we have been actually approved?!!?    soooooo more waiting again.

sorry for being a moany minnie just you are the only ones that understand.  


lots of love camly x x x x


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## Guest

I found our first panel daunting - we were being approved to foster and as you said there were about eight people on the panel plus the social workers and we were asked some really tough questions.  Luckily we were still approved.  We heard the decision of the panel later that day, and got the formal ratification a few weeks later.  

As a consequence, I was dreading our adoption (approval and matching) panel but it was fine - still the same number of people, plus the kids SW, but the questions were generally easier and it felt more like a chat.  We heard the decision just a few minutes later, although again it took a few weeks for the official ratification to come through and by then we were in full planning and preparation for our kids to arrive!

Saying that it is very rare for a people to go to panel and be turned down - if there are any siginificant concerns, the SWs would be raising them now and not taking you to panel.  Occasionally the panel ask for more work to be done on a specific area, before a final decision is made.  

Sounds to me like things are going well - I know you are disappointed about not getting to the December panel, but you will get your family soon enough.  Enjoy this time with just the two of you as you will struggle to find any once you have children.   

Bop


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## Camly

hey bop

thanks   your msg and info was very helpful - i think we are at the same panels? glasgow?

just bit   as i was looking forward to teling people that we were adopting as we have not really told many people? and i thought it would have been a good xmas pressie (if that makes sense?) thought it would have been nice to have a special xmas where we actually had some positive baby news?! 

hey hum not to worry.

thanks again though x x x x


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## Guest

I know what you mean about wanting to have good news, especially on big occasions when undoubtedly you will get asked tricky questions; when we were ttc, I was always most disappointed in months when it was a special birthday, wedding or Christmas.  We had hoped to have our kids before Christmas last year but it took until March for them to be here full time.  

We didn't go to the Glasgow panel but one closer to here (sorry, don't want to post where on a public forum), but I believe there is little variation across Scotland.  

Do keep us updated as to how things go - I'm really enjoying reading your diary and if you want to meet up, drop me a PM (although school hours are esiest for me, unless you want to experience our mad house!)

Bop


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## Camly

Hi

I thought that I would just add a little to my diary.

No further update though....still havent received the form f from our sw'er as yet? Not sure how long I should give it? DH keeps saying that I should just let it ride and wait til its recd.....but i have decided im giving it til fri and then im going to phone her.  then that will have been 2 weeks since she phoned to update some things and then 2 and a half weeks since the visit with her boss.

just wish things would hurry along....hate waiting!!!  


x x x x


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## Camly

ok so i couldnt wait til friday to phone and chase the form f so i called yesterday!!  

seemingly its being 'proof read' at the moment and should be sent out in the next few days.........think it must be 'sw days'!  our sw'er did mention again that both she and her boss were very positive and supportive of us?!   so hopefully the panel (whenever we get there!!!) will think the same.

so another day over and another day without the form f..... but at least we fight another day!!    keep you posted  x x x x


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## Camly

welll................ we got the form f on sat  , signed it up and handed it in today............. i felt over the weekend that we were a step closer and was on a real high......but then i handed the form in........the head sw'er said it my not be jan that we go to panel?!    feel totally fed up with all the false hopes. i know that everything has to go thru the process and things take time but when we first started they said it would be nov, dec at the lastest ofr a panel date and now....... 

sw'er also asked how our last visit went and when i said it was daunting she more or less said it was nothing compared to panel?  so all in all its been a pretty c&ap day   (between thinking i had won £130 in works lottery, to find out boss had won it so i only get £15 and then my shopping bag split outside the shops and all my shopping fell out - after i had been overcharged!) think a glass of wine is called for.......

lots of love an unhappy camly x x x x x


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## Guest

Tomorrow is a new day.......

Its also a good mantra for when you have your LO(s) as there will be many more bad days, along with lots of fab ones.  

I hope the wait flies by.  

Bop


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## Camly

hiya bop  

thanks for your msg and yes its true....i have survivied another day!!    doesnt stop me from checking the answermachine every night when i get home to see if we have a msg from sw?!    maybe some day...........  

x x x x


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## Camly

hi 

well monday should have been the date we would have gone to a panel if we had made the dec panel...feeling   about it. trying not to think about it much but not doing very well with it! my family keep saying that it means that our littlies are not there yet and it will be worth waiting for. suppose they are probably right.  just wanted to get to panel so we can start telling people that we are adopting - not told many folk yet as sooo scared its all going to go pear shape (still time i suppose  )

Ok, going to go now and help dh with his new shed!! the excitement never ends! hahahahaa 

lots of love  x x x x


----------



## Camly

[fly]WHOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!![/fly] got told today our panel date is.......................12th January 2009!!         

yes, WE ARE THAT HAPPY!!!

hopefully 2009 will be a great start!!

x x x x


----------



## Guest

What a wonderful start to the new year - I hope all our dreams come true in 2009.  

Bop


----------



## Camly

Thanks Bop.  Im hoping its a good omen for 2009!!    hopefully.

Hope your well.

Take care and enjoy your weekend x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya

well we got our letter in yest to confirm the panel date. our time is 11.30.  im finding that i cant get to sleep cause im thinking about it    i also have the funniest feeling that they are going to say we are able to adopt only 1 child - we have always wanted to adopt a sibling grp.  my dh keeps saying 1 would be ok too but i really wanted siblings.  oh well, only another 22 days til we find out. 

x x x x x


----------



## Camly

Hi Lambo

Just wanted to say thank you for your lovely msg. this website rocks!!!!


Merrry Merrrrry Christmas to you and yours x x x x x x


----------



## Camly

helloo

thought that i would pop on whilst i have a spare 5 mins - DH has taken his kids to the cinema. they are going back home sadly tomorrow.   really enjoy it when they come to stay. they are 7 & 10. good fun.

well, only another 10 days til we go to panel. whenever i think about it i get extremely nervous. over christmas, my dh and i were talking about the kid/s that we will maybe meet? thats been the first time that we have actually allowed ourselves to talk about it. we were always too scared before but as we get closer to panel, its becoming to become (hopefully) a reality??     

got final sw visit on tues to go thru the panel stuff. feeling bit nervous about that too as the last time she came with her boss i was really upset etc. hopefully it wont be that hard going this time... 

anyway..........here's to 2009!!  x x x  x x


----------



## crazybabe

Hi Camly

Happy New Year for 2009 to you, not long for panel for you now, our's is on the 26th Jan, I can't wait, we have already bought some Childrens books and Dvd's  for various ages in the woolworths sale.

What ages are you hoping for, we have said 1-2 children aged 0-5 years and 6 months girl or boy we don't mind, we are just waiting for our dream to come true to become a family at last.

Good Luck

Crazybabe


----------



## Camly

hiya crazyb

i didnt realise you had a date for your panel? thats great news.  

we are hoping to be approved for 2 kids under 4. i cant shake the feeling that we are going to be approved for just the one? i know that would still be great but would really love 2?

good luck and keep me posted x x x x


----------



## Camly

well, we have just had our final hs visit from sw!!   


we were discussing what will happen at panel. i asked about my concerns about only being approved for 1 child. sw'er said the panel would have good reason to only approve us for 1, when we would like 2. (financially/emotionally etc). she also said if we were approved for a sibling grp then we would have a longer wait. however, if only approved for 1, then it prob wouldnt be a long wait. she had a couple who were approved and had their 11 month old baby home within 4 months!!! so its swings and roundabouts.

feeling really nervous but hopefully it will all go ok. its like going on a blind date - you dont know what to expect! (mind you my dh wouldnt be too pleased if i was going on a blind date   ) hahahhaaa

update you all next week.......   

love camly x x x x


----------



## crazybabe

Hi Camly

Glad your final visit with your SW went well, have you been given a date for panel yet, we also put down on our form to be approved for one to two children, but I think the circumstances must be different here in Wales, we don't really mind if we get matched for one child or two to be honest, there are plus's and minus's to both I suppose, we would like siblings if we were to have two though.  We are waiting to read our report which will be any day this week and then go to panel 26th Jan - I am so excited but nervous also, We just want them to say YES!!!

Good Luck with everything throughout your adoption journey, nearly there now.

love

crazybabe


----------



## Camly

hiya crazyb

yeah we are at panel on mon 12th jan at 11.30am. nervous but looking forward to it.  i have started to think that either 1 or 2 would be fine. we would still prefer a sibling grp but however, not long now til we find out.

good luck with your panel and also enjoy reading your form f. it makes for very interesting reading!  

love camly x x x


----------



## Carol 36

Just a quick note to say good luck for Monday

 
Love
Carol
x


----------



## Camly

thank you carol.  

keep you posted.    x x


----------



## curvycat

just wanted to say good luck for monday darlin.

i think I am posting you luck all over the place but I think better to overdo it 

I am sure you will get what you need, thats not always what you want, what ever that be 1 or 2.


----------



## Camly

hiya kirstyn

thank you!!    very nervous but trying to have a relaxing weekend.

x x  xx x x x x


----------



## Tarango

Good luck matey xxxxx

xxxxxxxx


----------



## Camly

thank you mrs t!!!   

hapy anniversary to you and your dh also. have a great day. x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Just read your adoption diary.

Thank you for putting it here.  

GOOD LUCK for tomorrow.

Lots of love to you both, sooo exciting  

mavis x


----------



## Camly

thanks mavis. i know u like these so............   

be in touch tomorrow......

x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

GOOD LUCK babe, loving the outfit, I like black and green, black for slimming green for calm. xxxxxx


----------



## Camly

awww thanks mavis.    x x x x


----------



## *katie*

Camly all the best for tomorrow!                  

xx


----------



## curvycat

hope you are not on line stressing! 

everything will be fine, you just wait and see. 

Aunty Kirstyn says so


----------



## Camly

heee heeeee na, not stressing (much) just trying to pass time as i know if i go to bed i wont sleep....

thanks for your lovely msgs x x x  xx


----------



## Guest

Hope all goes well today - can't wait to hear your news later.  

Bop


----------



## Camly

helllllllllllllllloooo

we have been approved for 1 or 2 children.                 

panel wasnt as bad as we thought. it was actually very friendly. we were in for longer than we thought - about 20 mins.  they asked us some questions but nothing we couldnt answer. then we went out of the room and our sw'er told us the news.  me and dh started crying....ok well, i started crying which sent DH off and him having to console me.   we then went for a drink and phoned all our close family and friends to tell them the happy news. my mum started crying! must be in the genes!    so good times.

should get the official say so in writing in about 3 weeks. we are thinking about having a wee party to celebrate...may as well party whilst we can    x x x xx x


----------



## curvycat

congrats!

I am absolutely over the moon and believe that you and Dh will make wonderful parents to either one or two souls out there.

I have been checking every hour just for news and can relax now! 

Really really happy for you both


----------



## Camly

thanks kirstyn.


we are very happy!!!  now we wait....    

thanks again for your lovely msgs and support. your a star! x x x


----------



## curvycat

support doesn't end there! 

I am still here for you while you wait although I am sure it will not be a long one.

Have a good stiff drink, smile till your cheeks hurt, say thank you to your very own angel and share your love with DH noisily!  

Soon you will be mummy and have to be sensible so make those shapes on the dance floor!


----------



## Camly

hahahahhahaaaa  

actually feeling abit fragile - too much too soon this aft i think! hahahaaa we were gonna open a bottle of fizz but i dont think i can face it - plenty of time. 

thanks again kirstyn.  just hope i can be of some help to you in the near future.    x x  x


----------



## curvycat

I will definately take you up on that


----------



## Camly

good im glad  

right im going for a nice happy bath   

enjoy your night chicky x x x


----------



## crazybabe

hi Camly

How did you get on today with panel, I hope they said YES.

Our SW collected our signed report today, we just have to wait now til we go to panel on the 26th Jan YIPEEEEEEEEEE

Good luck with everything

Crazybabe


----------



## Guest

Fantastic news - hope you don't have long to wait now for your new family.  

Bop


----------



## Carol 36

Ahh congratulations to both you and your DH,    it must be such a wonderful feeling.

Cor I cried with joy when I read you had been approved, what I whally I am!!!

Fantastic news.

We've got our initial visit from SW tomorow, very nervous. 
xx


----------



## Camly

carol - awww your just like me sweetie - big softie!    greatest feeling in the world (said to dh yest, see we are having our own family - at some point - and i didnt even need to wee on a stick!!)     good luck for your visit - let me know how it goes. im sure you will be fabby x x x 

bop - thank you thank you thank you! so very pleased.  maybe once we have been matched i will get in touch with you for that meet up  

hiya crazyb - we got approved!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!whooohoooooooooooooooo 1 or 2 children under 4. very happy. not long now til your panel date.  it will be ere in no time. 


lots of love, still a very happy camly and DH x x x x x


----------



## curvycat

how you feeling now darlin?

still on cloud nine?


----------



## Camly

yip!  spoke to my dad tonight - who we hadnt told about any of our journey - he isnt the most emotional person (him and my mum split up about 25 years ago, still have contact but not mega close) anyhoooo he couldnt have been happier which was nice.  

looking forward to telling people now, as i wanted to make sure my dad knew first of all.  

its all good!!  

hope your having a good tues x x x x x


----------



## crazybabe

Congratualtions Camly on the panel saying YESSSSSSSSSSSS, you must be so happy, DH and I are looking forward to our panel on the 26th, was you very nervous waiting to go into panel I know I will, our's is in the evening so I have booked half day off work so I can chill a little beforehand - Did your social worker let you know that you got approved immediately or did you have to wait a while.

Hope you don't have a long wait for your match.

God Luck

take care

crazybabe


----------



## curvycat

Our dads are not good at the soft stuff are they?

My old man will talk to my DH about his worries for me but changes the subject if I mention anything  

Could you put a front page spread out in the tabloids?   I am sure I will want to write it in the stars


----------



## mavis

Camly,

Great response from your dad - that's lovely.

We told everyone as we were starting out and it is surpising the mixed responses that we have had. 

U must still be so pleased.

: )

mavis x


----------



## Camly

thanks lambo.    we cant believe its nearly been 3 weeks since being approved!   still waiting on the official letter tho    

hope your doing well. 

x x x  x x x x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hiiiii

well still no official letter from sw confirming we have been approved?!? i am going to wait til wed and then phone and chase it.

think i had a breakthrough tho....found out my best friend is pregnant and i didnt want to poke her eyes out!! hahahahaha  i was really pleased for her.  hopefully i will have some news soon to share with her!  

x x x x


----------



## Camly

well i phoned today and the head sw'er said not to worry about not receiving the letter yet, as their admin is really sloooow. then i got home and a call from our old sw'er to make arrangements to bring out out new sw'er!!   but my dh is working away that week   so i am waiting for her to call me back  to rearrange....or she can have just me!    keep you posted. x x x x x


----------



## curvycat

wont be long now darlin!!!! 

fingers are crossed for that amazing match!


----------



## Camly

thank kirstyn. hopefully    hope your doing ok x x x x x


----------



## crazybabe

Hi Camly

We received our offocial letter today    even though we knew we had been approved it was nice to see it in black and white, it makes it feel more realistic now....we are just waiting and waiting now very patiently for that match     

Good luck to you on your visit of your new SW'er 

 

Lots of hugs

crazybabe


----------



## Camly

hey crazyb

thats great you have your letter. must be nice to know its all confirmed and there in writing.  keep us posted.

lots of love camly x x x


----------



## Camly

well our sw'er is happy to just meet with me which is good. so new sw'er being met a week on mon!! whoohoooo!!! still no sign of the letter....

hope everyone is well.x x x x


----------



## Camly

at last - we got our letter in yest!!! whooohooo!!! it was soooo basic mind you, i could prob have typed it quicker myself!    not to worry, least we have it in black and white.

now we just need to wait to meet our new sw'er - week tomorrow.  nervous and excited all over again!!   


x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Glad it is with you at last.

Good Luck for meeting new SW  

How is your room coming along?

mavis x


----------



## sugerplum

Calmly 

I've just read your diary and well done. 

Sorry if this sounds a daft question but have they given you any indication whether they have a child for you to adopt.

Sugarplum


----------



## Camly

hiya sugarp

no nothing mentioned yet. the reason sw coming out is cause our sw'er is only part time and we need a full time that works from the actual sw offices. if im honest i dont think anything will happen anytime soon. which we are ok with as long as it does happen!    2 of my friends are pregant at the moment but even thats ok!!  

anything i can help you with? are you going down the adoption route?  x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hey Camly,

Great News, whens your new SW coming out? Hope they are nice.  Bet you cant wait - HEEE heee - wooo hoooo - Camly styleeee  

Must feel great to feel like you do with ur friends pg, I started to feel better once we committed to adoption - like there was defo hope for us - rather than continous disappointment - hope - unkown pain cycle.

Hope it is not long for you, you seem really nice.

Lots and lots of love,

mavis x


----------



## sugerplum

Calmy 

We just finished one course of IVF and unfortunately and I did not response to the treatment, hence we did not get as far as egg collection, so we are currently reviewing our situation. 

I've not researched it as of yet, I've just read a couple of the Diary's which are really helpful. Are there other agency to approach, other than the LA?

Sugarplum


----------



## Camly

hey you

im so sorry to hear about your treatment. its very difficult isnt it?  

there are seemingly voluntary agencies which you can contact but im not sure how they work? may be wrong in saying this but think the process goes quicker with them but they dont actually have alot of kids?? not sure but others on this site will know.

let me know if i can be of any help.  take care x x x x


----------



## Carol 36

Hi Camly

Great news about your social worker, look forward to hearing an update soon. 

It must feel good to get to the stage where you are strong enough not to get upset at friends/family pregnancy news.

  &  
Carol


----------



## Camly

thanks carol. not saying that im 100% ok with the whole pregnancy things - think about all the firsts that my friends will have etc but trying to focus on the firsts that i will hopefully have? if that makes sense?

love camly x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hellooooo all

nothing to report at our end. still waiting.met our new sw'er last month and she seems very nice. she did say that she wouldnt really be in contact with us unless there was any news. we got a letter last week to do a profile for sw and also a photo so we are working on that at the mo. we have also been invited to a support night at sw in few weeks, so looking forward to going to that.  we are just trying to organise our flat just now, putting new shelves up etc and trying to give us some more room.

hope everyone is doing well.

camly x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Pleased to see you back.

Glad your new SW is nice should be helpful for this next part of the process for you - whishing you laods of love and luck.

oooh do you find it easy doing the profile? is it quite straightforward I alwasy found tht wriitng sabout myself bit quite hard!! 

Nesting lovely, hope its coming on nicely  

Lots and lots of love and luck to you,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

hello all  

nothing to report with us... all very quiet. got another sw visit next week so thats the next thing with us.  not sure what the purpose of the visit is?  sw'er said it was to 'catch up'?  not quite sure what that means.  

i spoke to ss the other week and they said if nothing happening in 3 months then they may reassess us and put us forward for 1 child - we would prefer a sibling grp - as she said we are still young enough to go thru with a second adoption. tbh im not sure if we would go thru the procedure again? maybe it would be different once we have a child but at the mo....its a no.

hope everyone is well.

x x x


----------



## curvycat

I wondered if you had heard any thing hun

How long is it that you are tied to your agency?

You may find it easier to find your sibling group when you can look around. 

I would stick to your guns hun you have wanted a sibling group all along 

Anyhow here is a big


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

You can speak to SW when she comes about it all, try not to let it worry you too much, I am surprised that they are not looking for both anyway, because as you know sometimes BM is pregnant, did they say you were approved for one and or two or is it me getting it wrong?

Dont worry about going through the procedure again at this stage if you can, lets get you a match.

When is the visit?

lots of love,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

hello my lovely ladies  

next visit is on 15th April - week tomorrow.  We are quite keen for a sibling grp.  im not too desperate at the moment, just been getting some conflicting info re out form f being sent out etc so if i could just get some confirmation of that then i would be happy(ish)    im going to have a list of questions that i need answers to so hopefully that should put my mind at ease.  

its a weird feeling, just it could just happen at anytime, we could get a phone call etc so i find that abit strange? if that makes sense?

anyhoooo..... hope you 2 are coming along the adoption process smoothly  


lots of love camly x x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya

nothing to report unfortunately, but i thought that i would post that i have told another few people that we were adopting this weekend and they have all said 'can you not have children?'!!  we had decided not to really go into details about my DH's vas etc so i just said 'long story'. funny though isnt it, what people say.  dont get me wrong they weren't being horrible about it, but just strange to say that as i am not close to either of them, so bit personal thing to ask....one was a neighbour and another was my friends mum.  hey ho, nowt as strange as folk!   

lookin forward to our sw visit this week, not that i think there is going to be any news.  i think it will be a while...  

hope everyone has enjoyed their easter weekend. x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Hope the visit goes well for you this week.  You need to be kept in the loop and know where you are at and what is going on etc.  So should be good for you.

Thats a classic isnt it, the can you not have children and what they say, all I can say is I am sorry and I know how you feel as I am sure do loads of other people.  It hurts so much and I find it offensive too tough I dont think it is meant in anyway to be horrible its like a thought people have and say it out loud somehow!!!

Has been a relaxing weekend even though we have been here there and everywhere and now I am a year older too! argh.  How was your break?

Take care and keep us posted.

lots of love,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

Hey toots!

Had a nice weekend thanks. My DH is away working at the moment, so i kept myself busy with lunches and nights out!! hard life but someone has to do it     happy belated birthday to you!!    

its kinda tougher that the fact that i can have kids but when folk ask, i dont want to turn round and say 'my DH has had a vas' etc etc.  he feels bad enough without actually pointing the finger at him. poor love.

hope your doing well. take it easy and thanks for replying to my msg. 

lots of love camly x  x xx xx


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly.

Glad to hear you had a visit.  However sorry to hear you did not get any news.

I think hopes will alwasy be there, it is 100% normal.

Did you get any other info from SW?

Keep your chin up.

mavis x


----------



## Camly

hiya mavis

will pm you my sweet x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya all

nothing to report with us i am afraid. still 'waiting'! feel like everytime we meet with sw we are botherin her...like she keeps telling me she will let us know once she hears anything.

so we continue to wait....

hope everyone is well. x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hey Camly,

Keep ur chin up.

Try and if poss keep ur mind occupied wiht other things! I knwo it will always be there for you.

It must be so hard and I am not at all looking forward to the bit you are in at the mo, but I am but I am not if you know what i mean the endless waiting, not knowing etc.

Hopefulyl be soon for you babe,

love to you,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

hiya sweetie

thanks for ur lovely msg.  sick of waiting....   trying to keep busy but its still tough cause ur sitting waiting on the phone to ring etc.  however not to worry im sure it will happen at some point.

hope ur doing ok and thanks again

lots of love camly x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hi all

well, we have had a kinda disappointing week in a sense..... sw'er has advised that there are no siblings so they are going to put us forward for single children.  we have always been keen on 2 from the very start so feeling bit    i know that its good there are no siblings (if that makes sense?)  me and my dh have talked about if we would go thru the adoption procedure again - dont think we would.  its actually been much harder than i ever imagined - from the hs procedure to this waiting part.  without being dramatic, we need to take our ages into consideration as well.    god, that makes us sound like 100!! hahahahaaaa  

doesnt help that we dont have much confidence in our sw'er.  

oh hum, just another week in the life of adoption  


x x x x x


----------



## curvycat

Im sorry to hear that things are difficult for you babe

I am sure that they just want to open your chances for a quick match.

If it doesnt seem right and you want to wait for your 2 then you should. Dont be pressured as you are right going through this again is definately ideal.

Maybe though just maybe that right one will come along and it will all make sense.


----------



## Camly

hiya K

yeah i know what you mean.  its just really difficult when you have ur heart set on something isnt it? my dh suggested hanging fire for another 6 months for siblings, but then is that us wasting 6 months when we could have met our son/daughter?? i know 1 child would be excellent but still feel bit  

thanks for your msg tho chick, really appreciate it. x x  x x


----------



## Blu

Hi Camly

Sorry you're feeling disappointed, can totally understand. One thinkg to remember is that quite often after an infant has been removed from their parents, the mother then goes on to have another child quite quickly - unless her circumstances have changed dramatically, common practice is to remove that chld quickly and look to place them for adoption - the first place they will alwyas look is with the sibling, so if you are already approved for 2 you may find you get 2 siblings at seperate times. Maybe it is worth discussing this with your SW?

Also, have you signed up for the BAAF Be My Parent magazine, which has lots of sibling groups looking for adoptive parents? http://www.bemyparent.org.uk/

Best wishes
Blu


----------



## Camly

hiya blu

thanks for your msg.  we find that alot of the kids in the book are from england and we are in scotland so not sure how feasible it would be?  might ask our sw'er tho.

thanks again and ps your kiddies are gorge x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Sorry you're having a rough ride at the moment with it.

Only you know what is best for you guys.

I dont have much to offer but wanted to send you lots and lots of love and positive thoughts  ,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

thanks mavis. i appreciate it. got a visit next week so hopefully we can get some answeres then.  u just think that once ur approved no more disappointments or let downs can happen....    hey ho.  not to worry....

hope ur doing well chick and thanks again.

x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hi all

hope everyone is well.  we had a sw visit last week and.....................might be a possible link!!!!!!!               we have abit of a wait for next bit as our sw'er is on hol.  i will name her 'toots' on here - she sounds like a delight!!!  post more when i can.  frightened to say to much just incase but then i think, well its not not going to go ahead cause i was too exicted so im going to enjoy the moment!  

keep u posted.


----------



## curvycat

WOW babe! 

That is fantastic and so quick!!! 

Fingers, toes and everthing crossed 

xxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Camly

thanks kirstyn

we are all very excited - as in myself, dh and our families. hopefully it will all go accordingly.  will let ou know how things go. nothing will happen for next 2 weeks as sw'er on hol.

thanks for your msg x x x x  x


----------



## Tarango

[fly]whoooo hoooooooooo[/fly]

[fly]        [/fly]

very happpeeeeeeee for you all xxxxxx


----------



## Camly

thank u my sweet friend T!    x x x x


----------



## mavis

OMG Camly, sounds brill, got it all crossed for you. 

    

love to you,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

thanks mavis!    keep u posted    x x x x


----------



## Camly

ok...............so nearly 3 weeks since we heard about 'toots'.....this wait is like a form of torture!!!!!


----------



## Camly

well thats us had just over a 3 week wait to find out more on our possible link.  sw'er not been the fastest. had to gee her up last week and again this week - found out 'toots' sw'er on hol and not back til a weeks time.  thats all we were looking for - just an update!!!  anyhoo, hopefully things will have moved on in a couple of weeks. one of my friends said to me 'just enjoy things just now as you will prob find things move very quickly sooner rather than later' hope she is right.

x x x x x


----------



## Camly

well, bad news im afraid. found out tonight another couple have been chosen for our possible family. little girl and her sibling to be are gone.  we didnt know that another couple were in for them. so the dream is over. gutted.


----------



## Blu

Camly - so, so sorry


----------



## Camly

thanks blu. gutted      x x


----------



## curvycat

I am so so so sorry babe. 

I can only imagine how upset you both must feel.

Wont be long though darlin 

xx

ps I am "Kirstyn" incase you are confused x


----------



## Camly

thanks K!

so very upset.  its so hard not to get excited but i shoulda known things wouldnt have worked out smoothly for us...never does.

hope ur ok. x  xx xx  

thanks for ur msg x x  xx


----------



## Boomy

Don't usually post a lot over here now, but do read.  Camly I just had to drop you a line and tell you how terribly sorry I am to read your news.    I'm praying your dreams come true soon hunny.        

Love Boomy xx


----------



## Camly

thanks boomy, means alot to me.  cant get to sleep. keep thinking what coulda been. was hoping to be a mummy for my bday in sept.....oh well......not meant to be.

p.s ur little one is gorgeous x x x x x


----------



## Cotswold Girl

Camly - so very sorry to hear your news and that this match wasn't to be.    

Take care, CG xx


----------



## curvycat

I can feel your grief babe and I know that I would of been just the same and got all excited! 

We are all here for you babe so please do not feel you have to go through this alone 

xxx


----------



## Camly

thanks CG. its been a tough day.  we were originally told that wwere the only couple in for her, sw'er goes on hol for 2 weeks and then she comes back and another 2 weeks later we are told another couple have came into things and they have been picked? how can that be?? i understand competitive matching etc but when ur told ur the only couple then its a bit massive shock.  we are devastated.  x x x


----------



## Camly

thanks K.    hope ur ok x x x


----------



## mavis

Just so u know, i'm still thinking of you, x


----------



## Camly

Thanks mavis. really appreciate it. got our sw'er coming out tomorrow night as a follow up. we have thought of some questions so hopefully once we have those answered we may feel abit better.  its tough sometimes eh?    hope ur doing well and thanks again for yr msg. yr a lovely girl. x x x


----------



## Jomag

Hi Camly

I didnt want to just read and run.  I am just about to start my 3rd try at IVF and I know if it doesnt work then adoption is our last chance of a family.  Which is why I couldnt resist reading one of the diaries on this thread.

I am amazed by the ups and downs you have been through.  How have you stayed sane through all this waiting and your recent disappointment?  It just seems so unfair.  Surely this whole process could be made so much easier for everyone!!  SW's just dont seem to have much urgency, but I guess they become numbed by the whole thing and it is just an administrative journey for them - and they seem to spend their lives enjoying long holidays, while adoptive parents can do nothing but sit brooding at home watching the phone and the letterbox for some kind of hope.

Anyway, I wont ramble.. I just wanted to say that I was very touched by your journey so far and I really do hope you get a wonderful surprise some day very soon.  And when you do it will be everything you hoped it would be.  Just think of all the wonderful memories you have ahead of you.

Meanwhile,  I will continue on my own 11 year journey as a wannabe mummy, and hope that I wont have to start yet another waiting game at the end of this treatment!!

Good luck.

Jo


----------



## Camly

hiya jo

thanks for your msg.  lots and lots of luck for your 3rd ivf try.  im sure it will be 3rd and final time lucky - keep me posted.  

i suppose i should re-read my diay - its like everything isnt it - you kinda forget what you have been thru but at the time its horrendous.  we have had to get over the disappointment of the little girl as we have no option.  its so hard not to get your hopes up and no matter how many time sw'ers tell you not to get too excited or go too far down the line etc....easier said than done! we have found out abit of info on another possible link - dont want to say anything at the moment - but i must admit we are reacting very different to this link, which im not sure if its to do with 'is it the right link for us' or if we are just treading lightly due to our previous experience. i refer to sw'ers as if they are spanish - everything is tomorrow, tomorrow! never any rush.    anyhoooo....not to worry. what doesnt kill us will make us stronger!  

best of luck jo, look forward to hearing from you.    

lots of love camly x x x x x


----------



## Jomag

Hi Camly

Sounds like you are being very sensible about this new link.  I suppose that once you have had your fingers burnt once you arent so quick to stick them in the fire again!  Although, isnt it always the time when you dont get too worked up about something that it comes good.  Its when you pin all your hopes on something that it never happens!  Perhaps reverse psychology will work for you this time.

On the bright side, you are so much further on than you were a year ago, and its great that you are starting to get some links - you are well on your way and dont lose sight of that!

Please do let me know of any developments.  I would love to hear when you get your match.

All the very best with this.

Jo


----------



## mavis

Hi ya Sweetheart, 

Just wanted to post after reading your message on the main board.  Got it all crossed for you       

Love to you as always,

mavis x


----------



## Camly

Hello Mavis   

Thanks.  Havent posted anything on my diary. Will need to update it    

hope things are going well with you.  

lots of love camly x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

We're chugging away choooooooooooochoo oo oo oo oo oo oo! thank you

         for you both, sounds great.

mavis x


----------



## Camly

hey lambo!   

thank for ur lovely msg. hope things are goin well with you. im frightened to post to much about our 'possible' link incase it all goes pear shaped......again. hopefully b able to update soon tho.

take care

lots of love camly x x x x x


----------



## Tarango

whoooooo hoooooooo  

hi matey xx

lookin' goood  

   i have a feelin' in me water bout this one!!!  

xxx


----------



## Camly

thank you my sweet - here's hoping!    will opost more when i can    x x x x x x


----------



## Camly

well....................... had our sw'er, girls sw'er and FC visit us and..........................we are going to a linking panel...................on fri 9/10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                           they are talking about us hopefully having the girls home for christmas!!!       they are just under 2 and 3.  they both sound perfect!!!!! we are sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited - not sure if u can tell

keep u posted. x x x x x  x x x x x x x 

a very happy camly and her lovely DH x x x x x x x x x x


----------



## Blu

Camly, that's fantastic news - so excited for you


----------



## Suzie

Ohhh what fab news   I always shed a little   when I read these kind of posts

Not long to linking panel   


xxx


----------



## Camly

thank you both.  we know we still have quite a journey yet but we are getting closer.  it would b a dream come true if we could have them home in time for santa!    here's hoping.

thanks again x x  x x x  x x


----------



## Tarango

enjoy every second my friend - you deserve it!!!

am soooooooooo happy for you both 


xxxxxx

    

whoo-hoooooooo


----------



## mavis

Camly Camly Camly  

I am so pleased for you all. HOORAY                 great news next week for linking also omg.

Congratulations    Well done you guys.  

Love to you

mavisx


----------



## Jomag

That is great news!  Very pleased for you and hope you get them home in time for Santa.  What a lovely Christmas present for you AND them!

I was due to start IVF no. 4 this month and if it didnt work we were talking about quitting treatment for good and going down the adoption route.  However, I have been to the doctors this morning and I am actually pregnant!  I cannot believe it and just hope and pray that this little guy is a keeper.  I have never managed a pregnancy in all my 11 years of trying so this is progress indeed.  So happy today.

Good luck with your journey and look forward to hearing how everything goes.

Jo


----------



## Camly

OMG jo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wwhoohooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! many congrats.  keep me posted. very very pleased for you both      x x x x  xx x


----------



## Camly

ok.....so we got a little confused.....  seemingly tomorrows panel is.......................A MATCHING PANEL!!!!!!!!!!!        sooooooooooooooooooooo keep u posted and hopefully tomorrow i will be able to tell you that we are going to be a mummy and daddy to 2 little princesses!     x x x x x x x x x x x


----------



## wynnster

Best of luck Camly    Cannot wait to read your news


----------



## Camly

thanks wynn - hoping its good news! freaked out a little when we got the offical letter in. we thought we were going to a linking panel and then the letter stated matching. sw'er confirmed yip, matching panel and then fingers crossed after this its planning and intros!!!!!!!!! so fingers crossed it should all defo be a go'er for xmas....  hopefully. x x x x


----------



## Guest

Hope all goes (went?) well today and your dreams come true soon.

Bop


----------



## Jomag

Hi Camly.  Any news  Dying to hear how you got on today  How exciting!


----------



## Tarango

come on you little tease     

don't keep everyone guessing......   


xxxxxxx


----------



## Camly

[fly]WHOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/fly]

we are mummy and daddy to 2 lovely little girls aged 2 and 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! intros/planning tbc but hopefully have them home end of november.                

we are sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy happy happy!!!!!!!!!!!!! got a photo too and they are gorge!! heres to the best xmas EVER! x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Camly so pleased for you all, love as always, mavis x


----------



## Blu

Camly - what fabulous news - so happy for you and DH


----------



## Camly

thank you. we are soooooooooooooo excited. cant stop looking at their photo!    its ace.  thanks again. x x x x x x


----------



## mollyk

Congratulations Camly...So, So happy for you and DH.


----------



## Guest

Fab news - hope all goes well over the coming weeks, months and years!

Bop


----------



## Camly

thank you all x x x x x x x x 

ps - still looking at their photo!    x x x x


----------



## dawny36

Hi Calmy,

Just read this fantastic news girls are FAB!!! congratulations looking forward to reading how intros go.

HAPPY CHRISTMAS lol 

Dawny

xx


----------



## Camly

thank you dawny    we are very excited....trying to hold back actually buying anything for their xmas just now til we get to meet them and see what they like etc.  we are thinkin about getting the build a bear bears for them and saying a msg so we can give them the bears when we first meet them.  we thought we could put the bears in when we are photographing their bedroom    we are so excited. my sister has a little boy and is sooo excited that she will hopefully be able to take the girls to claires accessories!!   

   x x x x


----------



## Moppit

Calmly

Just read your updated diary entries such fantastic news. Massive, massive congratulations. You are so nearly there and are going to have the most amazing Christmas!!!

Moppit x


----------



## Camly

thank you moppit. we are over the moon. so very very happy.  im sure it wil be you soon     x x  x


----------



## Jomag

Camly - wow! Two little girls.  What could be better than that?!

Little do they know how lucky there are, they have so landed on their feet to find parents who want them so badly.  Have you stopped gazing at the photo yet  

The bit about buying them a build a bear each and putting them in the photo of their bedroom... that is so touching!!  How lovely.

Enjoy the next few weeks of peace and quiet in your home, it will never be the same again come end of Nov!  So pleased for you.

Jo

PS - we went for an early scan today and saw a little heartbeat.  We are only 6 weeks at this stage, but it is six weeks further on than I have ever been before, and it was comforting to see some life in there.  Makes it feel more real now.  Get another scan next week as it will hopefully be bigger then and he will have more to see.


----------



## Laine

Congratulations to you both xxx


----------



## Camly

thank you laine  

jo - thats brilliant. so very happy for you both. i wish u a happy and healthy pregnancy.  yes, we are still looking at the girls photo!    dont think we can take our eyes of it.  every now and again it still doesnt feel 'real'?  roll on santa!    x x x x


----------



## forever mummy one day

congratulations camly i am really pleased for you! xxx


----------



## Camly

thank you ever so much. still on  

x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya lambo!

u have hit the nail on the head.....it does feel like every day is like chirstmas eve. been on looking to see what we can get the girls from santa.  its gonna be soooo ace!! should hopefully have the girls home by end of november so not tooo long. oh and the fact that im giving up my work for a while is also a major bonus!!!     x x x x x x x


----------



## Chocolate Button

Wow what a Christmas this will be. I am delighted for you huni. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Camly

thank you choc b. actually went to bed about an hour ago as i am shattered but had to get back up as i cant sleep!    thinking thinking thinking!    good thoughts tho.    x x x x  x


----------



## Flow13

Many congratulations. Its wonderful news.xxx


----------



## Camly

thank u very much flow. best of luck with ur journey x x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya al

well we are still looking at the girls photo - sometimes it still doesnt seem real?    in the process of painting their room just now and we have got their bedroom furniture today.  so we are getting there.  sw'er should hopefully be in touch with us a week on monday with an update.  whoohooooo!!!!  x x x


----------



## Chocolate Button

Hi Huni 
What did you decide to do about your family book? Have you got the glue and glitter out yet?


----------



## Camly

not actually started it yet. we are concentrating on getting the girls room decorated and furniture etc so we can then take the photos.  got abit of less panic as our swer off this week and we haven't had our offical letter yet (not sure if thats a good or bad thing?!?   - they did say it could take up to 30 days tho).got a photo album and im going to put in our photos...friends etc and put captions beside them 'these are the people who can't wait to meet you', photo of each room with another caption 'this is where ur going to have your baths and showers' and we will fill the bath up with bubbles for the photo as our littlies love their baths seemingly.   

typical tho - my dh and dad were building the girls furniture and guess what? there were parts missing!    anyhooo my good old dad is going to make the bits we need in work tomorrow so it will be all good.    just cant wait to meet them  

thanks for your msg choc b x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Camly  

Bless you how fab, girls room OMG bet it is looking fabby, can you tell us what are you decorating it like oooooooooooooooh citing : ) ?

Hope you are well.

love always, mavis x


----------



## Camly

hello my good friend mavis 

well, we had initially decorated 2 walls grey and 2 walls a bight yellow/lemony colour with a lovey grey carpet as we thought this would suit either sex. but now i have had dh and my good old dad paint the lemony walls PINK!! it looks fab. got a little pink fluffy rug too. we are just going to get them plain pink duvet sets to start with and then once we have them home we can let them pick a character one etc....

it all seems abit  i feel like as a week and a half has passed and nothing has happened, im kinda worrying....  they did tell us that nothing could be done til the official letter has been received but im still just abit  but fingers crossed once we have the letter it will be all system go....

lots and lots of love x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly,

Thank you for sharing - sounds bloomin lovely   

You are doing Great keep going nealry there



lots of love

x


----------



## Blu

Hi Camly - how exciting your decorating and preparation sounds!

Just a thought, but with the postal strikes, you may want to ring and find out if your letter has been sent, or arrange to go and collect it!

Blu


----------



## Camly

hiya blu

i spoke to sw'ers today - both ours and the girls and things are progressing so its all going to plan.  hoping to hear soon regarding the planning and intros etc.  its all very complicated   you think you know what your doing and how things work but then bang! but im sure we will get there in the end.  still all seems very surreal still. 

thanks again tho        x x x x


----------



## mavis

Camly who hoo come on who hoo, you are doing it, you are gettuing there massive massivest hugs and loves to you    

mad mavis x muah!


----------



## Camly

thank you my sweet mavis.  x x x x 

keep you posted x x x x x


----------



## Camly

hello readers  

found out today that we have a date for our planning meeting - 2 weeks time - so things are starting to move. very exciting but also very scarey.  dh is building furniture as we speak    x x x x


----------



## Camly

well.....we got our offical letter today matching us to our 'future daughters'!!!           we are soooooooo excited. cant wait.  more and more things are starting to hit us like the realisation we may only have a few weekends left as a 'couple'. cant wait!!!  x x x x x


----------



## curvycat

WOW babe!! 

Just got back from my honeymoon and couldnt of seen better news! I am so so so so so happy for you both! 

See I told you that you would get the family you both deserve! 

Well done hun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Camly

curvycat - [fly]MANY CONGRATULATIONS AND LOTSA LOVE[/fly]

did u have a happy wedding and a happier honeymoon sweetie? hope so  thank you for your lovely msg, we are over the moon. thanks again and congrats. x x x x x x x x x x


----------



## Jomag

Camly - congratulations on finally getting that letter!! You must be beside yourself right now.  Must feel like all your Christmas's have come at once.

Enjoy your last few weeks with DH, spoil eachother rotten as you might not get much chance for a little while.  Those two little madams are going to need so much love from you both.  Little do they know how lucky they are eh!

So happy for you after such a struggle.  You deserve it.

Jo

PS - I am now almost 10 weeks preg now and going for first midwife appt tomorrow, wish me luck - am so scared that I will get there and it will all have been a big mistake!


----------



## Camly

hiya jo

thanks for your lovely msg.  whoohooooo 10 weeks!! im sure all will be fine tomorrow...im positive.  nothing to be scared off.  very very exciting. let me know how you get on.      lots of love camly x x x


----------



## Camly

hellooo

we got a letter in the post to say that intros are gonna be delayed due to someone being off on holiday - is it just me or are ss alwaysss off on holiday? anyhoo still got planning meeting on 11/11...........feel like its taking ages....wish we could find out when the placement hearing will be also?!?!  :-  oh well, suppose we have waited 3 years, whats another couple of weeks!   x x x


----------



## Boomy

Camly said:


> we got a letter in the post to say that intros are gonna be delayed due to someone being off on holiday - is it just me or are ss alwaysss off on holiday?


this cracked me up, hunny it happens all over the world, even here in NZ. When we were meeting Charlotte etc, you could guarantee there was always one SW away on holiday, or finishing early, or sick, or something...    

good luck chick  

Love Boomy xx


----------



## Camly

thanks boomy    they are a nightmare eh?    your littlie is gorge.  x x x


----------



## Camly

OMG!!!!!!!!!!! we met our daughters for the first time today!!!! went to planning meeting and then had a visit to their FC'er. they are fabby!!!!!!!! intro's started and i have now finished up with my work! hearing panel on 25/11 so we should have them home 2 weeks today.   sooooooooooooooooooooo happy and excited    x x x x


----------



## forever mummy one day

wow that is excellent news!!!! bet you cant stop smiling!!!! im sooooo happy for you!!! xxxx


----------



## Suzie

OMG  what a magical moment to meet your daughters   

Hope intros go well and what a great Christmas you are going to have 

x


----------



## wynnster

Oh wow wow Camly    So pleased for you and your daughters and dh     

I bet they're even more gorgeous in the flesh


----------



## Camly

thank you all    it kinda feels surreal 0 think cause we werent expecting to meet with them today so a lovely surprise.  our eldest!!! said 'bye mummy' when we left   but tbh think if i was introduced as jack the ripper she woulda said 'bye jack'!!    still a lovely feeling but hopefully as time goes on she will understand more.  

its ace!!! x x x x


----------



## Blu

How wonderful Camly, so excited for you!


----------



## mavis

OMG Camly, fabulous news for you all, loads and loads of love as ever, mavis x BIG BIG CHEESY SMILE  KISS   HUG   aaaah x


----------



## Camly

cheers mavis   

well 2nd dday of intros today.  i think i had better give my girls a nickname for her - eldest dd (aged 3) - lets call her giggler and youngest dd (aged 2) - smiler! both for obvious reasons.  giggler has the bestest laugh ever, totally comes from the pit of her tummy.  when we went into fc'ers house - giggler shouted 'mummy, mummy, mummy, daddy, daddy, daddy' it was very cute but she obviously doesnt really fully understand?  i wasnt sure how to react tbh to start with but when giggler was shouting daddy, dh said 'yes, giggler?' very sweet    both the girls wear glasses, well when smiler isnt breaking hers    anyhoo, we havent yet seen her wearing her specs as they were getting fixed so we went to fc'er and she took smiler outta the room and brought her back in wearing her glasses!! she.was.the.cutest.ever!    she didnt keep them on for long so i imagine that will be a challenge.    we have the girls coming to our home tomorrow for 3 hours, soooooo excited.  giggler didnt want us to leave today. we were like byeee, see you tomorrow and giggler was like noooo stay. then she said we will come with you!    all in good time eh?    so far its been great. i feel kinda....weird?   not like i thought i would feel. im normally tiny tears but so far i havent had any tears? not even with the giggler saying mummy?  think its cause i dont think she really means it - if you know what i mean?  i know it will all come with time but its just quite a strange feeling.

keep u posted.  x x x x x x x


----------



## Cotswold Girl

Camly - what fab fab news   Your daughters sound lovely and have obviously take a shine to you and your DH  

Enjoy the rest of your intros - can't be many more sleeps before they will be home with you forever!   

CG xxx


----------



## Camly

thanks CG. they are fabby.   me and my dh are smitten already.  only 14 more sleeps til they are home with us forever  

we feel that the night time is soooo long. think its cause we are so keen for the next day to come to see them again.    we are also pretty tired as well so suppose the early nights will come in useful!      x x x x


----------



## Boomy

O Camly hunny, your girls sound adorable, brought tears to my eyes reading your post as it brought back so many of my own feelings when we met our DD.  I know what you mean about it all feeling really weird.  When we met DD the FM kept saying to Charlotte "here's your new mummy and daddy" and I didn't feel like I was yet.  I'd only just met her.    It wasn't really until we got her home that I started feeling like her mother.  

Can't wait to read more of your diary.  It's an exciting time for you and your DH hunny.  Enjoy it... you deserve it.   

Love Boomy xx


----------



## Camly

thanks boomy     i think i get more teary eyed when people say nice things    i think its true, it will feel more 'real' once they are sleeping in their new beds in their new home with us.  just now it feels abit like we are just visiting and 'playing' with the girls.  im sat here thinking about them.  it could melt my heart! we have them coming to ours tomorrow for the first time, not sure how that will go without the fc'er being there as they love her to pieces. not looking forward to the day they will have to say bye to her.    gawd, i will be bawling that day!      

x x x x x x x


----------



## mavis

Hi Camly, lovely to follow this - thank you soooooooooo much for sharing it, it must be like a whirlwind of emotions, hope today at home went well for you all   . love as always x


----------



## Camly

thank  again mavis.  

not got much time as girls are on their way - just wanted to quickly let you all know that we are in love!!!!!  x x x x


----------



## mavis

BEEP BEEP A BOOP

yey Camly, lovely BIG BIG ((((HUGS))))  

x


----------



## Camly

hi de hi!

(sigh) i.am.goosed!!! but sooooo very very happy!! the girls are just fabby do!! get better every day even with gigglers tantrams! feet kicking, shoes flying off feet, grunting and making noises!   ignored for few mins and then she come outta her mood and climbed up onto me for a cuddle. had to explain that when we say no its for a good reason and she cant have tantrums everytime she is told no.  giggler and i were reading a book on sun and she said 'mummy?' and i said 'yes giggler?'  she then said 'i love you'!  wow! i melted ( i know she doesnt fully understand etc but it was still ace). I said thank you, and i love you. she then said 'i love daddy'! and i said go and tell him but noooo instead she shouts 'DADDDDDDDDDYYYYY?  I LOOOOOOVEEE YOUUUUUU'!! he was as choked as me.  priceless!  i cant believe how easy things are going (for the moment perhaps?) but its ace! the girls are making it a total joy for us. had first tea time and bath time today and that rocked! they were splishsplashing away. then giggler wanted me to blow dry her hair then smiler came toddling in and said 'blow'  

had a night out on sat with some friends and as we were not getting the girls til 11ish i thought it would be ok - no, we got them an hour early and i was feeling 'fragile'.  the thing which sobered me right up was......a stinky nappy! never having a hangover again  

i know that some of you reading my diary might not yet be a mummy but hoenstly it will happen! i was and still aren't any good at waiting but it will be seriously worth it once it happens.  stay positive.   

thanks for reading.  x x x x


----------



## alanelaine

Hi Camly,

Your daughters sound absolutely delightful and even better that you will all be together for Christmas.  Your hapiness and joy is really obvious and I hope you don't have to wait too much longer for them to be home with you for good.  They're certainly the best present ever for Christmas.
A&E


----------



## Camly

A&E - thank you.  see from your ticker that you have been matched too!! many congrats. its brill. enjoy every moment of it. and yes, we cant wait for santa to come - feel like we will have 2 christmases this year.    x x x x


----------



## alanelaine

Thanks Camly.  We won't meet our little one until some time early next year.  Its hard knowing she's out there and we won't be with her at Christmas but we will have many happy moments and Christmas' ahead of us.  We have been buying little things for her and my mum shouldn't be allowed near shops!  Every day she tells me she has bought something else for our daughter and can't wait for Christmas 2010.
We're absolutely delighted to be matched so soon.  She is the one for us and we can''t wait to meet her.
I'm sure you can't wait for cudddles from your girls tomorrow.
Very happy for you
A&E


----------



## Camly

sounds fab.    happy times.  sitting here with my eyes shutting - sooo very tired, dont even think i will be able to stay awake for celeb!! this will b u soon enough A&E    keep me posted please x x x


----------



## mavis

Camly, beautiful.  Take care all you lovely peeps, mave x


----------



## Camly

hiya

well, we had a day off today and its been................... weird!!!  i have sciatica in my back, which happened yest as i picked smiler up! ouch!!  Dh went into work today so i have been alone.  i feel like something is missing?   cant wait to see them tomorrow. got them from 10 tomorrow, give them tea and their bath and then take them back to FC. a week today and they should be home forever   cant wait!  x x x x


----------



## emsina

Love reading your diary Camly, glad the intros are going so well.  Hope your back's feeling better today.


----------



## Camly

thanks emsina  

had another good day.  smiler has been very clingy to me for the last few days but daddy managed to get a look in today which was good....bribed them with playing the guitar with him    he even managed to change her nappy today which was a brucie bonus for me!     my back was mega sore first thing this morning and i was really worried how i would manage....but its amazing what you can do when you have no choice? first thing i was panicking and worried  how i would cope with picking smiler up etc but its been much better.  got to fight thru it!!   hahahahaaaaa!  DH has got a cold and is feeling very sorry for himself....  obviously his cold is muccccchhh worse than my backache   

got a review meeting tomorrow. cant believe how quickly time is going.  giggler told me she loved me again today (melt)!  and that was even after she had been on the naughty chair!!    all in all, its ace!!  x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya all

well hopefully tomorrow is D Day!! all being well    feeling abit   about it all. we went to fc'ers on sun to help put the girls to bed. it was.a.nightmare.com!! They were screaming crying shouting etc etc.    i was upset - not in front of them tho but it was really hard. they are super close to their fc'er and i dont think it did them any good us being there and fc'er? we were supposed to put them to bed again last night but we decided not to as we didnt think it would b fair them. they are going to be upset/strange enough tomorrow night never mind upsetting them unnecessarily at fc'ers. giggler has started wetting the bed too so its too much for them.  i can honestly say im not looking forward to tomorrow night, feeling bit uptight and anxious about it to be honest. just hope its. suppose we will find out soon enough.  dh has been fab tho.  he is so positive etc-he is my rock.  

apart from the worry about bed time and taking them away from fc'ers for final time, all has been good. they are great. cant stop kissing them - even with the tomatoe sauce all over their mucky faces!!    

keep u posted. x x x x x x


----------



## Suzie

Camly this is me speaking with my foster carer head on  please don't worry about taking them away from the fc, trust me the fc is their temp carer and wants these little ones to have a fab life with their new mummy and daddy 
I think the bedwetting will just be a response to the changes little one is facing and it will settle. Even though they are only little they will pick up on everything and will soon come to realise what a great mummy and daddy they have.

Remember we have all had similar fears/worries and are here for you  
X


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## Guest

Camly - you will do a fab job - yes it wil be tough at first, but you will survive and they will settle quickly.  

As for bedwetting - all of ours regressed on this when they arrived (even the 8 year old), but (touch wood) we've not had a wet bed for months now.  

Thinking of you all today
Bop


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## Camly

Bop and Suzie,

   thank you thank you.  im sat here just now - hopefully my final morning of being without the girls.  the change in residency panel should be happening about now.  we have to go and collect the girls mid afternoon.  feeling all mixed up feelings wise.  feel like this should b the happiest day of my life (which it is) but i feel more   than excited etc.  hopefully once we have the girls home then it should be ok.  just keeping thinking there is still that 1% chance that things wont go our way today, as SS told us.  

will keep you all posted and thanks again.  x x x x x


----------



## Guest

Enjoy your last few hours of freedom and I don't expect many updates in the coming weeks as I suspect you will be too busy!!

We're here if and when you need us.

Bop


----------



## Camly

thanks again Bop. really appreciate it.  hope your all well.  x x x x


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## Jomag

Camly - thinking of you today and hoping that things go smoothly with the big transition.  It is bound to be a huge shock for everyone (including yourself!), but once you get a few nights of putting the girls to bed, feeding them, changing them, spending the day together, and getting to know eachother a bond will soon develop.  

In a weeks time you are going to feel like they have been with you forever!!!

So happy for you and cant wait to hear how you have all got on today.  Will think of you tonight in the hope that you are tucking YOUR daughters up for the very first time.  This is the first day of the rest of your life, and those little girls will never look back.  Give yourselves time though, and dont expect too much from yourselves.  This is HUGE!!!

Let us know how you go.

jo


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## Camly

hiya all

well, we have our 2 daughters sleeping in their new beds as i type.  bed time was a nightmare! they were screaming and crying. giggler kept shouting mummy mum mummy! last for about 10 mins and then all quiet.  been a funny sorta day but glad they are home with us.

thanks for all ur lovely msgs.

x x x x x


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## Blu

Camly, congratulations - wonderful news. Now pour yourselves a nice glass of something to celebrate, and prepare for years of bedtime battles (usually when you just think you've got bedtime cracked   )

But seriously, it's fab news, enjoy your new family 

Blu


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## Camly

thanks blu. im actually supping some champagne that my lovely dh bought me and also wearing the fabby armani watch that he gave me this afternoon after bringing our girls home! im a lucky girl.

x x x x


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## Suzie

ohhh how lovely Camly  Bless your dh 

When C arrived I had to sit on his bed for the first 2 weeks until he fell asleep  so you have done really well getting them off to sleep this evening  

Hope tomorrow is fab for you 

x


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## Camly

thanks suzie. the fc'ers done a great job with the girls. they told us exactly how to deal with it.  seems pretty harsh letting them cry it out - my sister is horrified!!!    they are out like lights. heres hoping they wake up ok..... soon find out in about 7 hours!    x x x


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## Suzie

C is exactly the same way  We have to ignore him as if we talk to him he just goes on and on  

Ohhhh early start for you then! C loves his sleep and will go to about 8.30 on non pre school day 

Best you get some rest !

x


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## forever mummy one day

congratulations camly!!!!!!!! this is brilliant news, so glad you have them home at last im sure it will all be running smoothly sooon. xxxxxx


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## Camly

thank you forever  

girls woke up at 5.25 this morning. pretty good going seeing as how we put them to bed at 6 last night - well, 6.15 by the time screaming/crying etc stopped.  Dh went into the bedroom to check on them and smiler was lying on the floor!   he picked her up and placed her back in bed. she didnt even stir.  i woke up this morning to the sound of Mummmmmmmmmm mummmmyyyyy mummmmmmmm! so we got up and thats been us since. washed and showered by 8.30! feel like we have done a full days work already.    but in good way.  

so far so good.    x x x


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## Guest

Glad to hear the first night went well and its wasn't an even earlier than expected start.  Sounds like your DH is also being a fab support.  

Enjoy day two.....what are you planning?

Bop

PS Have you discovered the pot placement board - you have to request access and its a very limited community, but sometimes its easier to share in there.


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## Camly

hiya

yes my lovely dh is a great support.  we have always been a good team and this joint parenthood situ has just proved it!   

well yesterday we went and introduced the girls to my work - they were all in love with the 2 of them by the time we left!! i was worried they may be abit shy etc but nnooooooooo they were right in there, jackets off 'hiya' 'hiya'! it was great.  bed time was ok, and we even had a long lie til 6.30 this morning!  

today we went into town and then dh left us to look round the shops - he HATES shopping, so i thought, yes why dont i take my 2 daughters and go and look at shoes!!! they were very well behaved and it was all good. we came home today and then one of my best friends came down to meet them for the first time. she thought they were ace too.  then bath time gave out a little surprise...... smiler had an 'accident' in the bath and i thought her sister was going to be sick! dh dealt with the 'surprise' and i got the girls out as quick as possible.   very funny....

i have a works night out tomorrow and getting my hair done, so daddy is in charge! they will have a great time. daddy loves to give them kisses and throw them up high!!! which they love and cant get enough off. im just wondering how 'fun' it will all be for me at 6.30 on sunday morning Hmmmm........  

have a lovely weekend all. x x x x x x


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## Camly

omg!!!!! we have not long woken up!!  kids got up at........................815!!!!! clever girls! dh joking that they prob not go to sleep tonight as i am out!      

hope u all have a great weekend. im just about to take the girls up to my mums. she loves them!  x x x


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Camly - You don't know me but i have been reading your diary for a while, and am so happy for you. I'm sitting here   

What a wonderful xmas all 4 of you are going to have and a wonderful life!


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## Suzie

Fab camly  long may the late starts continue    Have a lovely weekend xx


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## mavis

Camly,

Loving following your diary.

Love to you all, take care

mavis x


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## Camly

morning!!!

well thats our daughters been home for over a week. i dont know where the time is going! they are very amusing.  smiler is mimicking everything!   when i am telling giggler to eat her tea, smiler starts to copy me. so poor giggler is getting told off twice!    they are little delights....obviously not all the time but who is perfect? we are putting our christmas tree up this weekend. im normally a 12 days before and after sorta girl but i dont think i can wait any longer!!! im sooooooo excited for christmas.  we took the girls to see santa yesterday. i had a tear in my eye, as i said to giggler that santa would give her a pressie, then she asked if it was her birthday. had to explain to her that santa also gave her presents.    little lamb.  anyhoo, we went in and met santa, giggler sat on his knee but smiler wanted me, so yes, you guessed it - mummy had to sit on santas knee too!!! hahahaaaa! got the photo to prove it!     we were laughing as i was saying to santa, hope your not going to charge me for this as well, then i said maybe he should have been paying me!!!   v funny.  smiler has just started saying 'i oovvv you'! giggler says all the time 'mummy, i lovee you'.     very nice to hear.  its ace!!!  


hope all all have a great weekend. x x x x


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## curvycat

so pleased for you darlin and reading your diary is just the medicine I needed today! 

Sending you all soooooo much love xx


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## Camly

thank u curvy cat.  

its such a big change but the girls are ace   they are lying up on the couch watching spongebob just now - caught them holding hands earlier which was very cute. now smiler is tickling giggler!    we are going to see if we can get smilers glasses fixed today - not that she will even wear them but gotta try.  

its amazing how things change - my sister thinks she may be pregnant - and i was fine! didnt flinch or anything.  it obviously helps the fact that we have our 2 girls now. amazing!!!  x  x x x x x


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## Tarango

hiya!

lovely to hear you are all getting on so well - bet it feels like they have always been with you

sending you lots of love and big squeezes 

Xxx


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## Camly

thank you my lovely tarango!!!


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## wee emma

i've just spent my day in work reading your diary, its been such a rollercoaster for you hasn't it?  

congratulations to you and your dh for getting to the end in one piece and in getting your little girls, how wonderful  

can i just ask you, when you were sorting out all the adoption stuff with the social workers, did they ever ask your dh's ex for a reference?

we have discussed adoption (dh is in two minds about it) but our problem would be that his ex is a bit of a    he hasn't spoken to her in about 3-4 years and she has stopped him seeing his girls for nearly a year now. i'd hate our application to be ruined by her?


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## Camly

hiya wee emma  

yes, we have had the perfect ending- well so far!   still abit of the adoption journey to go but we are getting there.

yes, our sw'er spoke to my dh's ex wife. she was the one that broke their marriage up but has always played the 'poor me' card!!   anyhooo, we explained everything to our sw'er etc whilst we were going thru our home study. the ss are not silly, they understand that relationships break up badly sometimes and whatever ex's may say they take with a pinch of salt. they are obvioulsy concerned with any possible problems when it comes to the safety of the children etc.  im sure you both would be fine. we were very surprised by the referecen given by dh's ex wife....u may be too?    

any questions please feel free to ask     x x x


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## Camly

been a wee while since i updated.  well, the girls have settled in well.  sleeping for 12 hours    tried to put them down a bit later than normal to try and get them to lie bit longer in the morn. at their fc'er they were going to bed about 6 so getting up just before 6. so now we are aiming for 6.30ish and they get up about 6.15.  its great but i am a realy sleepy head!!    they are very good tho. once they go to bed, thats it - we dont hear from them til the morning.    still having abit of difficulty with giggler with some of her eating but we are trying to praise her alot and do different things to get her to eat up. its strange as its things we know she likes? anyhoo, we will get there. im just trying not to stress about it.  she is getting enough fluids etc so HV said its ok. 

the girls know about santa etc but they are not that bothered tbh?  my step kids are coming up for christmas this year    so they arrive next wed so im sure once they are here and meet the girls it will be hectic.  my aunt is coming up from down south for xmas day this year too as she wants to spend time with all of the kids etc so its going to be mayhem! cant wait.     we have decided just to have xmas day with the 6 of us    so all of our family are coming down to our house just before lunch and we will make some snacks etc and then they will all go for about 3 and we can all have our dinners in our own houses. means we are al settled for the night and dont have people coming in and out at all hours! really looking forward to it. its going to be great fun.  

come xmas day the girls will have been home for a full month - where is the time going? the girls sw'er said its one of the best transitions she has seen!    so that was nice to hear too.  

hope everyone is well and organised for the guy in the red suit to arrive. x x x x x


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## wee emma

thanks camly, i doubt she'd give us a good reference, she's always been determined to make him out to be a monster so she'd have such a good time ripping him up.

maybe the girls aren't interested in christmas because its never been much of a thing for them? bet that'll change after this year


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## Camly

well merry christmas everyone    

we are just waiting on our roast potatoes so thought that i would come on here for a quick 5 mins.  got my step kids here and the 2 girls - perfect!! well apart from our oven door breaking which is the reason we are waiting on our roasties!!    we were up at usual time - 6:20 and we made a big deal that santa had drank all the whisky and rudloph had eaten his carrot. girls loved it. my stepkids are 8 and 11 so are really passed believing but still made it special for the girls.  they all opened their pressies and then smiler went and picked up the monkey toy she always plays with!   typical.  giggler woke up with the cold - her wee eyes and nose are streaming.  she is her normal wee self apart from that, heavy eyes but doing ok.  she has made me feel like a proper mum today as i have been wiping eyes, noses etc and making sure she is ok. she keeps coming up for cuddles etc so its pretty ace     

had our family round and my friend, so now we have shut the doors and its just us. my mum said she couldnt believe that they girls had been here a month today - feels like much longer. sometimes think she could eat them up!   

soooo all in all a merry day in the camly household.  its all good!!  

merry christmas all.  lots of love and cuddles camly and her expanding family x x x x x x


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## emsina

Wow - that's amazing camly (not the oven door  )  Hope giggler got over her cold and noone else has come down with it.
Wishing you and your 'expanding family' a very happy new year,
Love emsina x 
12 days 'til intros with tinkerbell - yikes!


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## Camly

hi all

well, we have had a tough week or so with the girls....well when i say tough    giggler has been playing up with her food - not eating, then eating, then throwing it up. smiler has been waking up thru the night and we can't get her back to sleep. she has also been crying lots and lots (well, more like a scream) and not wanting me to leave her side. its soooo very tiring. we are struggling on, its slowly chaning back to what it was but its just hard going at the time.

looking forward to things getting back to normal, so we can get into our routine again. we have a day out with my mum and my nephew tomorrow so looking forward to that.  

bed soon for me    x x x x


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## Camly

well thats been 12 months today since we were approved to adopt!! jeso!! where has the time gone  i wonder if i would have been saying that if we hadn't had our girls?   but we have!!! been a tough week with one thing and another....but they are great.  full of cuddles and kisses....sometimes too many - can't even get for a 'wee' myself!    happy days!

im going to make a nice meal for DH tonight....not much of a cook so not quite sure how it will turn out..    keep u posted  

x x x


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## Jomag

Hi Camly

Sounds like you have your hands full, but I guess it is all worth it.  It's only to be expected that the poor little mites are hard work at the moment... they must be so confused and petrified of things changing again.  I am sure that with enough time and effort they will start to realise that you arent going to leave them and they will start to feel safe - probably for the first time in their lives.  Bless their little cotton socks, they probably dont know what to think right now.

I hope you are managing to keep going with the tiredness, I know that is the one thing that worries me about having the baby.. how I will cope with hardy any sleep and all that extra work!  However, like you, I am just so glad to be getting this opportunity so I will just take one day at a time.

I have my 20 week scan tomorrow and am petrified.  I can't settle and am just so worried that there will be something wrong.  I have had such a lovely pregnancy so far that I just keep waiting for the bubble to burst.  I guess I'm a little more paranoid than most first time mums because it has taken me 11 years to get this far!

Anyway, its always nice to hear how you are getting on.  So happy that things are working out and you seem to have completely fallen for the girls already. 

Jo x


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## Camly

hiya jo

  thank you for your nice msg. 

im sure all will be great tomorrow. please keep me posted.  i can imagine how u are feeling, its a major thing - major great thing!! take care of urself x x x x x


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## curvycat

amazing to think it is only a year! wow! 

that was a much needed reminder to me that actually I have not been going through this forever what ever it may feel like! 

so glad all is going as well as you deserve xx


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## Camly

Thanks Curvy.  It is a long time - the process - but i can honsetly say its so worth it. there are times when im sat looking at our 2 and just smiling (sometimes im sat thinking please just do as your told!  ) but yes, more worth it than not.    hang on in there. x x x


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## Camly

well i thought i would update my diary. 

the girls are still great.    giggler started nursery on thurs, daddy took her as smiler is still clinging to me for dear life! not going to go into things to much but the girls had contact with their BP's 2 weeks ago so things are abit out of sorts     anyway, DH said that he never seen giggler - she was off on her first day of intros which was a good sign. then on fri mummy and smiler took her, and she was upset   my poor little girl. anyhoo held on for 5 mins and then the teacher said she was fine and to go....walked out feeling   but i know most kids are like that. picked her up and she was fine    see how she is today. we bought her a new 'school' bag so hopefully she will be ok.  im missing her and its only been 2 days since she started nursery    

smiler is missing her sister too. her talking is coming along a treat, very funny. she is at the stage of mimicking everying....speech, mannerisms, etc. makes me   

ok, better go and get ready for school - well, giggler that is, not me      x x x x  x


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## kittykat1234

Hi there camly,

I am fairly new on here and have pm'd you if thats ok   xx


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## Camly

just replied kittyk     x x x


----------



## Camly

hiya

smiler got new glasses the other week, she hasnt really worn any glasses as they had been broken so now i feel like i have a 'new' little girl in the house! she is proper cute and find that i can't give her into 'trouble' or say no as she is just too cute!   we will see how long that lasts! hahahaa  mazingly she has been keeping them on too.  giggler got some 'big girl' glasses too so she is wearing them very proudly too.  

we are having a great time. daddy was looking after them for a few hours this week, to try and get smiler to let go of me. dh said she only cried for a little bit and then that was her! brill   next day she never even cried so here's hoping we have turned a corner.  

got a date for our first hearing, end of feb. can't believe how quicky time is going.  

smiler's talking is coming along as well, prob to do with the fact that she is copying everything everyone does! its so funny.

ok, bath time so better get moving.   x x x


----------



## Camly

been a while!! girls have been.............exhausting!!! just ur typical 2 and 3 year olds.  i must admit the last couple of weeks i have found tough going, giggler been playing up with food and smiler not doing as she is told but as i say, just generally being kids!!    

anyway, had court and another date has been set.    even though we knew there was really no chance it would go thru today, still feel bit disappointed.  lawyer said it might take as long as august!!    we are also having to deal with contact with the girls and their BP's so its been a very stressful time.  

but in general the girls are fab.  they keep us going and laughing each day.  giggler's talking is coming along, copies everything you say which can be quite amusing.  

love to all x x x x


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## kittykat1234

Hey Camly,

Lovely to read your update - please keep them coming!! 

Definately sounds like you have your work cut out well and truely 

I hope the dealings with the bp's isn't too bad although i imagine thats VERY hard and weird for you all!!

It sounds to me though like you are doing an amazing job and the little ones are truely blessed to have you and your dh and you them 

Here is a link that may be of some help to you re the fussy eating - hope it helps xxxx

http://www.netmums.com/food/Top_tips_for_fussy_eaters.1606/

/links


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## Camly

thank you KK  

i have been on the netmums site - its very good   but thank you. the whole food thing has been going on for a while now, we are at the stage of - dont eat it, thats fine. then leave her at table for a little while, then take her out of kitchen and she gets jammys on and bed.  (noticed alot of the time she doesnt eat it and plays up is because she is tired). we normally have a bath after tea and then bed so its not much of a difference by her going to bed that bit earlier.  

my dh is away until sun, he works away with part of his job so i have been used to it.  not just as easy with the 2 girls mind u! but hey ho just got to get on with it.  

thanks KK for ur lovely msg as well x x x xx


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## kittykat1234

No problem - glad things are getting sorted!

Yes that Netmums site is brilliant!! Ill definately be on that when the time comes  

Keep the updates coming please xx


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## Camly

thought it was time for an update.well the girls are still fab....apart from the food thing. managed to get giggler to go for a wee nap in the afternoon - which she has never done. feel this is helping with her mood, when she is tired she plays up. she only has about 20 mins but so far so good. 

only probs been having is to do with contact/court cases/childrens hearing panels/etc etc.  it seems to be ongoing.  we ae hoping to take the girls down south to visit dh's family but as we do not have any 'parental rights' we have to ask SS to ask the BP's! so, we are waiting to hear back regarding that. it just seems madness that we have to ask regarding haircuts, weekends away, etc etc. its driving us slowly insane    this is not part of what we thought the adoption process would be like.  we knew that it wasnt going to be plain sailing but..........

hey ho such as life!!  just need to plod on.  

x x xx  x x x x


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## mmmbop

Hi Camly,
I need to read your journey so far,but thought I would just say hello,how frustrating t o have no parental rights, I hope this changes for you soon,sounds like you are enjoying the highs and lows of family life, love to all. 
M'bop,xx


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## Camly

thanks MMmmm.

Im actually going to mention to my sw'er that we were not aware that the BP's still had parental rights etc.  I stupidly thought it was down to ss's to make decisions etc.  we heard from our sw'er yest and its not looking good for us taking the girls away to vist family.  fed up with the whole palava tbh.  feeling really   about it all.  but as i say we will just need to get on with it.  the girls are brilliant    x x x x


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## kittykat1234

Try and keep your chin up   - must be hard though!

It does all sound very frustrating  

I would have thought it was ss decision too! xxx


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## Camly

thanks KK.    

hope ur doing ok x x x x


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## kittykat1234

Yes i'm good thank you  

Been getting mixed reactions these last few weeks as i have started telling more people. The reactions range from BRILLIANT GO FOR IT to quote " i think your mad"  

Anyway, its my life, my decison, wanted it for so long and it feels sooooooo right  

First sw visit on tues, i'll keep you posted, just off to watch more adoption stories that i have recorded  


Hope you are all ok and having a fun packed weekend in the sun xxx


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## Pink Lady 66

kittykat1234 said:


> Yes i'm good thank you
> 
> Been getting mixed reactions these last few weeks as i have started telling more people. The reactions range from BRILLIANT GO FOR IT to quote " i think your mad"
> 
> Anyway, its my life, my decison, wanted it for so long and it feels sooooooo right
> 
> First sw visit on tues, i'll keep you posted, just off to watch more adoption stories that i have recorded
> 
> Hope you are all ok and having a fun packed weekend in the sun xxx
> 
> KittyKat good luck for this week, as long as you are happy in your decision and no doubt you are dont let it get to you, I know exactly what you mean, luckily all the people we have told have been positive but i have wanted to be a mummy for so long that no what anyone might say it wont put me off, i am so excited and looking forward to our journey and no doubt you are too, so dont let anyone try and spoil it for you.


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## kittykat1234

Thank you lady pink  

I think people just see a 30 yr old girl single and think what are you doing!! But saying that, i have only had one reaction like that, and she has recently been left a single mom and is still very bitter and also didn't ever really want children, it was more him, so i'm trying not to let it get to me!! Everyone else have been great!!

How is your journey going?? Any news? xx


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## Camly

kitty - dont let anyone's opinions cloud ur journey.  some people find it difficult to understand adoption or even be positive in every day life!  chin up and keep positive.  


x x x x


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## kittykat1234

Thank you Camly - you are soooo right!!

All still good with you??

x x x


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## Tarango

Hi, 

I agree with Camly - don't let other people's opinions put you off..... I have had to sit there (cos I'm too polite   ) and listen to someone tell me the wait opst approval was 'exactly the same' as being pregnant - well I am obviously an elephant cos my 'pregnancy' has gone over the usual 9 months!!!  

People just don't understand .......   

T
xxxx


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## Pink Lady 66

kittykat1234 said:


> Thank you lady pink
> 
> I think people just see a 30 yr old girl single and think what are you doing!! But saying that, i have only had one reaction like that, and she has recently been left a single mom and is still very bitter and also didn't ever really want children, it was more him, so i'm trying not to let it get to me!! Everyone else have been great!!
> 
> How is your journey going?? Any news? xx


No nothing we are going to wait til we hear from LA to be honest as however nice VA was she did say we would be better with LA if we want a younger child and we are hopefully looking at a 3 - 4 year old boy, i want to get decorating our room in neutral colours, but my dh will think i am nuts, but there is a lot to do.


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## Camly

hi all

the girls are doing so well. feels like they have always been here tbh.  obviously they have their 'moments' - but dont we all and they are just the same 'moments' any other 2 and 3 year old have!  

we are having alot of troubles with contact with BP's and 'rights', basically us not having any!! we were not allowed to take the girls away for the weekend to visit dh's relatives.   we even have to ask if we can get their hair cut?  at the moment contact could be weekly, so each week myself and my DH feel sick.....have done for the last 16 weeks of having the girls home. be glad once its all over......which im not sure when that will be?  

however, we have to get on with the daily grind, parenting, etc etc in amongst all this so no option but to get on with it but as i say, its just as well the girls are brilliant!!  x x x


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## Camly

hi all

thought i would update again today whilst the girls are playing! my dh has been workin away for the last week, only supposed to be for a week but now its been extended/delayed for another week............i have been managing ok myself. just have to make sure everything mega organised - making tea, tidying away toys, getting jammies out for after baths etc. then once the girls are in bed i can have a 5 min sit down and catch my breathe!  

each day there is something they do that makes me belly laugh and think 'god, im so lucky'....then there are moments when im screaming inside!    ha ha ahaaaa but they are very good girls. giggler is at the stage where she thinks she can kiss everything better - i said i had a sore tummy and she came over and kissed it    little lamb.  smiler has a new pair of slippers on at the moment and she looks ultra cute    fabby do!! 

happy days indeed x x x x x x


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## Tarango

happyyyyyy happy days , giggler kissing everything better makes me smile  

enjoy them sweetie - lovelyyyyyyy

don't let the 'other' thing get you down  

xxx


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## Camly

thank u my lovely friend t!        x x x


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## kittykat1234

Hi Camly  

How are thing going?? Any better with the bp rights situation??

How are the girls doing? Still full of the joys  

Hope you are all having a good weekend xxx


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## curvycat

why do you have such frequent contact babe?? is yours a type of concurrent adoption?? sorry if I am being intrusive or dumb or both


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## Camly

hiya CC

not sure why contact was re-instated but thankfully it has been changed to letterbox only - thank goodness!!!!!

the girls are still fab!  giggler was playing up abit but DH had a little chat with her and since then she seems to have settled down.    smiler has started nursery so i think its good for giggler and i to spend some time together. i dont think she has had much one to one in her little life.    once smiler has settled into the nursery, giggler and i will be able to do more things together.  at the moment we are staying close to home incase we have to go and collect smiler from nursery, but so far, so good    we have been having some fantastic weather this week, so we have been out playing in the garden, in the sandpit and slide. its been good.  DH has been away this week and normally by this time i am frazzled but its been a good un!    

had some   news tho - our solicitors thought the AO would hopefully b granted august time, but now its changed to Oct.  Its just so frustrating but i suppose we have the 2 little ladies here so thats the most important part.  

x x x x x


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## rikschick

Hi Calmy  
Your week sounds so idyllic... sandpit, slide, sunshine and your two little ones - could life get any better?  Well done for not getting frazzled with DH away - you must be wonder woman! 

Sorry to hear about the delay in the AO... it seems that there are so many hurdles to climb over on this path - you are so nearly there now!

Much love and hope the sun continues to shine this weekend for you xx


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## curvycat

bad news about the ao I know for me it would be a race to the finish and the end of sw's!!!


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## Camly

thanks rikschick.  my dh works away now and again so the longest i have been myself is 2 weeks....u get into a routine and sometimes its easier!! not to have a 3rd child to tidy up after    it has been pretty good week.  hopefully it will continue. 

cc - im not the most patient but its funny as when i tell people about whats happening etc everyone asks how we cope with it - weird to say but u just do! our days are so full of everyday stuff that we dont get a chance to think about the legal side of things.  but yes, here's hoping it will all hurry up and we can be a family of no more ss's  


x x x x x x x


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## curvycat

on the plus side we have been adviced to hold off the ao just in case "and I am sure nothing would in your case!" anything comes up where u will need more ss support

once they are urs I believe that they disapear into a cloud of smoke "well almost  " and sometimes it is later into the placement when the childrens needs truly come out

as for patience I used to think I was the most inpatient person I knew but just to do this process we must contain an exhauberent amount of patience!  

u are more patient than u know


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## kittykat1234

Hi Camly  

How's things hun?

How are the little ones doing? xx


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## Camly

hey KK

things are going well ta.    the girls are fab. since smiler has started nursery (giggler still off for her easter hols), its been nice to have one to one with giggler. dont think she has ever had that?  so we do things just the 2 of us which i think she enjoys, me 2    still hard to believe sometimes that they are here and they are our daughters.    they are gorgeous and make us very happy.

hope things are progressing nicely for you chick 

x x x x x


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## kittykat1234

Ohhhh that's sooooo nice to hear, sounds lovely  

I have had an awful weekend as had to have my princess put to sleep friday night, but she is at peace now and i know it was for the best, still awful though!

Prep course in sept so i am just keeping busy doing my extras, ready for when hs starts xxx


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## Camly

helloooo

well, we had our first 'family' holiday with the girls. just to a caravan but they seemed to enjoy it. my mum and sister and nephew were there too. we had abit of a late night the first night - by about an hour or so and i think that had just rocked the boat as smiler has been tired. she has been crying at most things since sat!    anything u ask her to do etc results in tears.  she is very tired, wee lamb but no matter how much i try and get her to have a little cat nap, she fights it.  the tears are still continuing but here's hoping she will settle down and catch up with her sleep.  it was a very diff hol having the 4 of us to organise. obv dh saw to himself and i dealt with ohh...just everything else!!    typical man! but it was good.  i would have preferred somewhere hot obv but seeing as how we cannot even take the girls down south, there is no chance til the AO is sorted....which will prob be end of the year.    hey ho, not to worry. 

all else is fine with us.  its hard to believe that the girls are here and they are ours (well, not yet officially but in our hearts).  

x x x x x


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## ❣Audrey

Massive hugs Camly I hope smiler is more settled soon xxx


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## Camly

thanks bee bee.  think she is just over-tired and keeps fighting it! typical 2 year old - never listens to a thing!    mixed with pmt (mine obv not hers  ) its not the best combination.  

another day battled....now for tomorrow    x x x x


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## ❣Audrey

aww  another day won you should say chick!!!  Bless her.  They really do fight tiredness don't they!  My niece is the same and she is 4! xxx


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## Camly

they are funny tho eh?  (well, she wasnt this aft when she was crying as i asked her to put her slippers on!!)      x x x


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## ❣Audrey

Lol bless her!  They are so funny - they're so tired but so determined not to admit it!  Falling asleep in front of you but if you go to put them to bed...I'm not tired!

xxx


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## Camly

its amazing how things just carry on from day to day without actually noticing any difference?  i realised yest that giggler has stopped having her temper tantrums - no naughty step oh for about 4 weeks now! dont get me wrong she is still 'misbehaving' but not to the extent she was. noticed her concentration has gotten better too. she never used to sit still for more than 5 mins and now she will sit down with a book and 'read' it or watch tv for abit longer than she would (not that she is sat at the tv every day!    )  smiler has also come along as well, her talking is getting better each day.    and the best bit of all - their eating!!!!!!!!!!! giggler is now actually asking for more! it does go to show that alot of things are just a phase. at the time its hellish but then it does pass    every day is a learning day when u r a parent. 

we are just heading to toddlers - the excitement never ends    there is a lady there who adopted her son about 2 years ago, so we have a good chat about the system etc.  

take care all.

love a contented and happy camly x x x x x x


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## Tarango

helloooooooo

Glad to hear your girls are settling in more and more, hope you enjoyed Toddlers     Can't wait to take Spike to a 'group' or 2!!!    

Good news about them eating more now, great news!!!

xxxxxx


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## kittykat1234

Hi hun,

Just caught up on your posts. I have had my laptop die so been very limited on being able to come on here   

Soooo glad littlies are doing well, it's their fab mummy and daddy too that will be helping them thrive   

xxx


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## Camly

thanks kitty. very kind of u.    

x x xx x


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## kittykat1234

Only the truth my dear   

Just please don't forget any of your tips and advice for when it's my turn        xxx


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## Camly

well, i have had my first 'mummy' trip to the hospital!!! giggler has been ill since sat, high temp, sickness, tiredness etc. dr gave her some anitbio's on morn am but i took her back in the pm as she was still being sick and her temp was hitting 40...they told us to go to the hospital. typical that dh was away golfing in tenerife, but he was in a taxi on way home as i was on route to hospital. poor giggler was asking for him so he came straight up and my mum looked after smiler.  we were at the hospital for a few hours and her temp came down, thankfully. she is still poorly even now. she has slept for the past 3 hours. its horrible seeing them so ill....wished i could swap places with her.    she has been so brave tho, we are very proud of her.  

smiler is outta sorts too - she has been waking up at 5am(ish)!!!! and nothing u say will make her go back to bed, so a mixture of giggler and smiler i am knackered!!! i could seriously sleep for a fortnight! which isnt good seeing as how im away next thursday for 3 days to ibiza with my friend!    better catch up with my sleep before then.  

the joys of being a mummy eh?   

hopefully my next post will be to say how much better my gorgeous little giggler is feeling    x x x


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## Tarango

hiya, 
        giggler gets better soon - bet it was worrying for you   

love 
T
xxx


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## Camly

thanks t.  she is much better today. wanting to play again with the toys and jumping about like her normal wee self. thanks goodness    

will try and get round to replying to ur pm sweetie. x x x


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## ❣Audrey

How worrying for you!!!! I am glad she is feeling better xxx


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## Camly

hiya all

well, i have had my few days away with my friend.  missed the girls and obv my DH too but i think it was the best thing that we could have done tbh.  the difference with smiler and daddy when i got back was incredible.  my dh works away sometimes and smiler is a proper mummys girl so it was good for the 3 of them to spend some quality time etc together.  i was a very happy girl to come home.  the girls missed me and it was lovely to get some kisses and cuddles.  perfect! 

smilers talking is coming along leaps and bounds. some of the things she says is so funny   

all in all, things are pretty great just now. look at them sometimes and cant believe they are ours (well, not officially as yet) and that they call me mum    melts ur heart 


x x x x x x


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## Tarango

hi matey xxx

sooo lovely to hear xxxxx

glad you had a good time away (    )

love
T xxx


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## ❣Audrey

Aw glad you had a good time away and that smiler was able to bond more with Daddy! xxx


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## Camly

thank u my lovely ladies    x x  x xx xxx


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## Camly

hi all

well we had our review with SS and it all went well.  i was talking to them about how i was either very niave/stupid as i thought it was SS that made alot of the decisions.....but clearly they only make 'recommendations' and that the BP's still have 'parental rights'. we weren't aware of this when going thru HS or 'waiting' period. i had mentioned it may be something to discuss with approved adopters.  i know that thre are some diff cases where SS can make decisions etc but the things that i find hard to deal with are - BP's have to make decisions on whether the children can have the swine flu vaccination, if they require an anaesthetic (even at dentist!) if they can be taken out the area for a small break/holiday.  We even have to ask for permission for haircuts!!!  i fully understand that until such time as the AO is granted that the children are not legally ours but at the same time...if they BP's are not able to take care of the children and the decision has been made for the child/ren to be placed for adoption then.....

but however, here's hoping it will all be finalised within the next 6 months     then i can cut their hair whenever i please      

the girls are still doing great. smiler has def realised she is 2 and can be terrible!!!!    at one point this week i didnt think that i was up to being a mummy.  she was crying, screaming, whinging, whining, etc etc etc....non stop. complete temper as well.    i thought that i was going to havr to phone daddy to come home from work and deal with it.... i was    she was    (and still whinging!) but it has gotten better, thankfully.  to look at her you would think she was a little angel - my mum still doesnt believe me that she can just kick off!    but its all good now.    back to enjoying being a mummy!!   

parenting is def not easy but its def worthwhile....esp when they tell you they love you and that you are their friend      

lots of love camly x x x x x


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## Camly

found a photo of me and the girls with santa today. we must have only had the girls home for about 3 weeks when the photo was taken. made me think about the first time we met them etc and also how much they have changed since meeting them. both in personality and looks.  melts my heart when i think about it    in a good way. cant believe these little people call me mum    when we are out and about and someone will be chatting, if they ask giggler what her name is she says 'giggler, this is smiler and this is my mummy'. its just fab!!!  x x x x


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## Camly

well, we are in the midst of potty/toilet training smiler at the moment. she has been doing it full on for about 2/3 weeks now. dry during day for the past week    she is clever wee cookie. its really hard going tho...knowing when she is telling the truth when she says she needs a wee when ur out and about....pants down, in between parked cars etc!!     then she says, dont need a wee mum!!    she has even come off nappies at night time as alot of the mornings she has been fully dry - not sure if its a fluke or not but now she only wears pull ups to bed. started to put her into pyjamas as well. she used to pull her nappies off so used to wear a babygro. (must admit i loved her in the babygro, as she looked super cute) so my baby girl is now looking grown up.    but in a good way    i have my step kids here just now, and they are very good with the girls. the girls absolutely love them both. its very nice to see.  we all went away to a caravan for the weekend....started off bit like national lampoons vacation but ended well    the kids all enjoyed it and there was lots for them to do so it was all good.    

all in all, mummyhood is going very well (at the moment, as there are no tantrums happening!!) i feel very lucky xxx


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## ❣Audrey

Awww so lovely that you are enjoying it so much C!  Loving the toilet training! My niece who is 4 likes to check out all new toilets far too many times, and half the time doesn't need to go! It does get frustrating as you still have to trust that they are telling the truth each time they tell you they need to go!

So glad things are bright and sunny xxx


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## Camly

well i recently had my first birthday as a mummy and it was perfect!! my dh bought some 'happy birthday mum' balloons and its also our wedding anniversary on the same day and he bought us a card from the girls    got woken up by giggler at 6.30 with her throwing the door open and shouting 'where is the birthday girl?' hahhaaa  it was lovely. then they both got into bed with us whilst i opened my cards and pressies. whilst we were eating the birthday cake later on in the day, giggler shouted (with her mouth full of chocolate cake) happpyyy birthday mummyyy.     had a little cry but in a good way. both girls are coming along nicely and smiler is fully potty trained now...next step to try and get her to reach up on the toilet for a pee.....got her some step things but she doesnt like it so not pushin it at the moment.  we are at court next month when fingers crossed everything will be official....not looking forward to it but as i say its got to be done and then hopefully we will be a forever family!! 

xxxxx


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## panorama

Aaaawwww what a magical day for you! Giggler and smiler sound amazing! Can't wait for my first b'day as a mummy now!    Hope it goes well at court next month! xx


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## Camly

Thanks Pan      its wonderful....well, most of the time!    we have been very lucky.  

hope ur journey is going well xxxxx


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## Camly

hellloooo!!!

well we were at court today for our 'battle'! supposed to b there for 2 weeks....less than 2 hours later AO was granted!       soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo very very very very very very happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  they.are.ours.forever!!  xxxxx


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## Boggy

Fantastic news!  I was about to PM you to say I hope all was going ok -  now I don't need to!  You must be so so relieved.  


BX


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## Tarango

soooo happy for you 

here's to the rest of your lives as a forever family xxxxx

xxxxxx


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## Camly

thank u lovely ladies. we r just so happy its all over!! now our daughters are offically _ours_!!!   xxxx


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## wynnster

Congratulations Camly, Mr Camly and Little Camly's   

Woo Hoo - Heres to the rest of your lives together as a family


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## Camly

i cant believe a year ago today we met our daughters for the very first time!! its amazing how quickly time has gone and everything we have gone thru.had all our final social work meetings so now we are just a 'normal family'!    fabby!! we are desperately waiting on the adoption cert coming so we can apply for passprts for the girls. we would ideally like to go abroad for a week before the end of the year, but the rate things r being done, dont think it will be possible. we r also avoiding going dates of the christmas concerts as both girls will be in same one for the first time. cant wait   

the girls r flourishing and are just gorgeous. we r very lucky  xxxxxx


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## Camly

well true to everything that happens with us!    we are not able to go away on holiday this year as the courts mucked up the girls adoption certificate    it was soooo spooky as well, as we received them exactly a year to the day of bringing the girls home....just a pity they were wrong! we had given the girls middle names and they were not on the certificates so now they are having to be reissued. nothing ever goes smoothly eh?    never mind, at least they are ours forever. i have been poorly for the last few weeks and the girls have been fantastic, really really good. gonna treat them to something once i feel better.

thanks for reading and wont be long now til santa comes     xxxxxxx


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## Camly

well.............holiday booked!!    we r off to the canaries in 2 months time!    cant wait. the girls r super excited to b going on a plane fpr the first time. they keep asking what we will do when we get there. its lovely    i no it wont be our normal type of holiday but once we r there and the girls see what there is to do etc im sure we will all have a ball.  

got smiler lying up beside me just now, having a cuddle. im defo her favourite!!    daddy doesnt get a look in, poor soul. giggler will b starting big school this year too - frightening where time goes.

hope everyone is well xxxxx


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## Camly

well, we had our first family holiday abroad and it was fab!!! lovely seeing the girls have all their 'firsts'.....in the sea, builindg a sandcastle in their swimsuits, in the pool, etc. they had a ball and giggler kept saying this was the best day ever    they loved going to the kids disco at night time as well. giggler is def not shy, she was right up there asking the entertainment man for the microphone and kept shouting 'hellllooooo'    super funny. 

we have also noticed that smiler is coming out of her shell more now too. she used to just follow giggler but now she is coming into her own which is lovely to see as well. hoping once giggler goes to school, then smiler will become more confident again.  had induction day for giggler    she was desperate to go off with her new teacher and kept sayin 'byyeee'!        time is going so quickly. 

life is good and we feel very very lucky xxxxxxxxx


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## Camly

well, thats my big girl started school    she turned 5 this week too and i cant believe how much more grown up she has got in just 7 days! it may all be in my head but she seems to have changed so much. she is loving school cant wait to go back each day. my mum kept saying 'once they start school you lose them'! i didnt know what she meant but i do now....silly things like how independent she wants to be.    hope she will still need me! 


xxxxxxxxxxx


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## Mummy Noodles!

Wow - what an amazing story Camly!! I have spent most of the night reading it from start to finish. WoW! What a woman you are - an inspiration! My DH and I have just started the adoption process and I really hope I/ we manage it!!!!


WELL DONE YOU! Wishing you loads more happiness with 'your girls'!


Happy families! Noodles xx


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## Camly

Hi Noodles


Thank u    Dont always feel like an 'inspiration' to b honest. the girls are fab, we were just talking last nite that its been 2 years now that they have been home, and how their little personalities are starting to shine thru. they are both so different. we are all really looking forward to christmas as they are so aware of whats happening etc. giggler wrote her first santa letter last nite and i must admit i was super emotional! she has been learning her words and letters at school so was able to write exactly what she wanted!     and can i say, she was struggling as to what to ask for! hahaha - 'what have i not got?' was what she asked     priceless. needless to say i have more or less got all their presents and of course she asks for stuff i havent got her.ha! oh, well looks like i better get online. 


i wish u every success in your journey noodles. if i can help with anything please feel free. 


lots of love camly xxxxxxxxxxx


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## Mummy Noodles!

Hope you and the girls had a fabby xmas which much Joy. 


Had our prep courses and filled in a mountain of paperwork! We are waiting to start our Homestudy now. A bit like yourself before I am trying to be patient but I cannot wait to adopt!!!!! 


All the best to all the Camlys big and small for 2012.    Noodles xx


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## Camly

thank u noodles. we all had a fabby time. girls were spoiled per usual    giggler kept saying it was the best day ever!      


good luck with homestudy - u will be fine   


hope u had a nice christmas and new year xxxx


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## Camly

hello all

i dont get on here often to read posts or update my diary. our little ladies are now 4 and 5. our youngest, smiler is starting school this year!! i cant believe it!! at the moment she only goes to nursery the days i work, so 5 out of 7 days we are together. im not quite sure what im going to do without my little buddy. dont get me wrong it will be nice to have sometime to myself etc but im gonna miss her.

the girls have completely different natures. its only really now that we are starting to recognise this and i love it!! giggler is a total tomboy and smiler is a little princess! they are a complete joy (obviously not _all _the time) and there are sometimes when i can't believe they are all ours!!! we love them so much.

hope everyone is well and their journeys are progressing.

lots of love xxxxx


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## Camly

Well hello there

Hope everyone's journeys r progressing  

I find it hard to believe that our girls have been with us for nearly 4 years. They have grown and changed soooo much which is jus t awesome to witness. I feel very blessed and the simple things r def the best.

I wish u all the very best of luck and would say stick with it.....I truly believe everything happens for a reason 

Xxxxxxxx


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## Camly

Hi all

I cant believe our little ladies will b with us 6 years his year!! Where does he time go?

I still find it funny to think they r all ours. They r complete opposites of each other which is strange as they r full siblings.


Every day brings a new challenge which is just life I suppose.  

Wouldnt change a thing though!!  xxxxx


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## Moppit

Hi Calmly


So nice to see your post.


Our two adopted children have been with us now 1 year and 4 years respectively and every day does bring new challenges but also new delights. Like you I would not change a thing.


For all of you reading this that are just embarking on the adoption journey or waiting to be matched keep positive. At times it can feel like it will never happen but Calmly and I are testament that good things do come to those who wait.


Our son was placed with us 4 years ago this January at 21 months and our daughter came 1 year ago this January aged 11 months. They are both the centre of our world and we could not love them anymore.


Good luck to you all and special wishes to Calmly and her gang!


Moppit x


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