# Cutting myself off from people



## Hopefulshell (Mar 14, 2013)

Hi girls

I failed my 3rd cycle a couple of weeks ago
and since then I'm struggling to socialise
with family and friends. I just can't bare to 
talk about tx yet don't have the courage to 
put on a false smile and dumb down how I feel 

I don't recall feeling this way after last two 
attempts. I've lost my confidence in general so
maybe that's part of it? I'm scared of crying
the second someone mentions it yet tired
of pretending the desire for a baby is no 
big deal or that each failure is harder to accept 

Sorry for the down post - it's been one of those
days! 

Thanks

X


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## hilly35 (Feb 14, 2012)

Hey sweetie, I don't have any great pearls of wisdom but I do know a wise woman will respond with comforting words. In the meantime I just wanted to give you a big hug. You need to be kind to yourself and give yourself the time to deal with the grief of your failed cycles. It gets harder not easier so I totally understand where you we coming from. Why should you have to put on a smile and dumb down your feelings. You have a right to feel sad about this and to work through your emotions until you are ready for your next decision. Thinking of you xx


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Sending you lots of hugs honey  

I was the same after my recent BFN (second one). I just couldn't face people because if they mentioned anything I thought I would burst into tears. Plus, I don't want to talk about it, but then I don't feel like small talk either. Added to the fact that everyone annoys me!

I have found that the more I force myself out the easier it's got. Don't get me wrong, I'm still drowning in tears inside my heart, but in a way I'm grateful to hear other peoples voices rather than my own. 

One thing that's helped me a little bit is starting a new exercise regime. It's not much but I feel it's given me something else to think about, and when I can't handle other people I have something to talk about. I literally go for a fast walk a few times a week and do a few fitness/dance videos, but it's just enough to help. I went out with friends at the weekend and found the exercise conversation easy because it was something I didn't have to fake for once. It's like a safe none-IF subject.

You are in a really hard place honey, but you aren't alone. If you can't face people you don't have to, but don't leave it too long. Try and pick a less high maintenance, more easy going, people to try and make you feel stronger about it.

I don't know if any of that makes sense to anyone reading it, I don't seem to be able to get my thoughts our tonight!xxx


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## Hopefulshell (Mar 14, 2013)

Thanks very much ladies for your kind
words of support. I can see from your
signatures the respective struggles and
sadness you've both experienced and I'm
sorry for your losses too 

It's hard not to let the whole IF thing just
take over your life and break you down in
the process isn't it?! I work from home and
and currently trying to set up my own 
publishing business. I think half the problem
is I have way too much time on my own to 
just reflect and brood!! Not very entrepreneurial
of me I know  

Sending lots of hugs xx


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