# Advice



## Star10 (Jun 22, 2013)

Please could someone answer a question for me, when doing the adoption process do you have to mention ex boyfriends that you possibly haven't seen for years and what if you don't have any contact details for them what happens then?


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

They are only interested in contacting previous partners for relationships that were serious i.e. you were with them long term, lived together or had children.


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

When we did hs it was only those you had significant relationships with. I had a boyfriend before I met dh, it was over 18 years ago and the relationship lasted about 2 years. Our sw didn't want to know about that but I'm not sure about if you have no contact details. I think you have to do what you can to find them if ss deem them as significant. HTH


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## Lorella (Jan 10, 2013)

Hi Star
It really varies from LA and VA I find. 
I had a couple of past serious relationships where we lived together. I had to write about them but they were never contacted or visited and I never had to give any addresses. This was something that really worried me when I was thinking about applying so I understand why you've posted the question. For us it wasn't an issue and now less than a year on I am watching my gorgeous 9 month old daughter crawl around the floor! Even if it is 6 O clock in the morning! xx


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## Sun Flower (Jul 14, 2008)

Your have to tell them about all relationships during the assessment and the sw decides what they think was a significant relationship, eg. Lived together, together for more than 2 years, engaged, parented children together etc....

We were told we didn't need to contact ex's ourselves, if we gave names, dates of birth and area, they would search for the (a LA so via the electoral register I pressume??)   and they would write to them so we didn't have to contact directly ourselves. 

Best advise is be completely honest with your SW, they really don't like withholding info
Good luck x


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## pyjamas (Jun 24, 2011)

I have been with my husband for 11years and married for 6. Prior to meeting my husband I had a 7 year relationship and lived together. I thought I may struggle to find him but did and SW said he gave a glowing reference!  x


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