# Worried I haven't cried enough?



## Jules18080 (Oct 25, 2010)

Hi all

I know this sounds strange but I'm worried I have been too calm about my bfn...... Don't get me wrong when I saw the test my heart broke.... It broke when I started spotting on day 8 and cried when my family came over to see me on day of testing.

Due to my pcos I still have had no af apparently my body is clinging on, a park of hormones last and nothing. I have had blood test and internal scan and no baby so I know I'm not clinging on in hope .

Am I normal? I want a baby more than life itself, I'm broody, always told I born to be a mum by I'm scared I'm bottling it all up for a crash! 

Sorry for the me post but any thoughts welcome xxxxx

Roll on feb when I can start again 

Jules


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## Cazne (Jul 19, 2009)

Jules,

I'm so sorry it hasn't worked for you.


Of course you are normal - not crying doesn't mean you aren't feeling.  People just have different ways of dealing with it.  We jsut had another failed attempt and I didn't cry until at least a week after we knew it had gone wrong.  

Take care of yourself

Cazne xxx


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## Jules18080 (Oct 25, 2010)

Thanks Cazne


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## Kirstyboo (Jul 7, 2010)

You're not alone, I've not cried either and nor has my other half....

During the treatment it felt like it was happening to someone else and I really kept my distance from it, it still doesn't feel real to me...

Guess it is just our own way of coping and coming to terms with it... 

Remember it is ok to cry. 
Enjoy the festive season and look forward to Feb

good luck for the future xox


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## Nordickat (Feb 6, 2009)

Sorry it didn´t work this time. I always find I get proper closure on a cycle once my af arrives even though I already know it hasn´t worked. But I haven´t cried each time. Sometimes when the journey has been so consuming, its almost a relief that its over and you can be a normal person again for a while before you try again. It really doesn´t mean you wan to be a mummy any less than somebody who cries continuously for days on end. We all deal with it in different ways.
I hope next time round you are shedding tears of joy over a BFP


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## jenny80 (Apr 8, 2009)

hI

what you feel it totally normal. No-one can tell us wat or how we will feel at each stage of  IVF. Its ok to cry but equally ok to not cry its what feels right at the time.

Wish you lots of luck on next round of IVF. 

Jenny


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## Jules18080 (Oct 25, 2010)

Thanks all xxxxxxx


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## Hope40 (Aug 4, 2010)

Sorry it didn't work this time.

I also wasn't as upset as I expected on my failed IVF cycle.  A little cry but nothing like the rest.

However, when I went back to the clinic for the first time after the failed cycle, I was completely surprised by how emotional I felt and even had a little cry in the toilets (how glamorous). 

This is my 7th attempt (2nd IVF cycle the rest IUIs) and my frozen egg transfer is tomorrow (hence waking up at 5am).


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## toria77 (Dec 9, 2010)

I feel exactly the same. I do believe we all deal with things differently and just because you're not upset doesn't mean you don't feel anything. My last cycle was my 5th but 1st with my new partner. In a way I think I've got used to the idea of it not working, also I have twins from my previous marriage so it doesn't feel as desperate as all the other times.

My way of coping is researching what I can do to improve next time and thinking about next time. I'd like to try again asap but will have to see what the clinic say and we need to chech our finances!!!


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