# PLEASE HELP!!



## jenni01 (Oct 15, 2010)

Hi...
I was wondering if anyone could help me!..I have had multiple losses and now just had another failed IVF (NHS funded)..it's clear to me that my body can't sustain a pregnancy...
My heart is breaking, I can't imagine my life without our child..we have so much love to give..
We live a normal life, my partner works with people with special needs, I used to be in sales but due to treatment I stopped...our life is basic but we don't go without..
As you have probably gathered I'm nervous 
How do we go about surrogacy?..I've looked on some sites but to be honest the fee's scare me..
I no you can't put a price on your dream but unfortunately I have to....
Please...where do I go from here?
Luv Jen.x


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## greatgazza (May 27, 2010)

Jen

I'm so sorry to read that you're suffering so much.      I'm really not an expert here as i'm quite new to all this and relatively new to what an absolutely horrible roller coaster it can be.  I'm not sure i can offer much in the way of advice or wisdom and i'm sure more qualified people will come along soon but i saw your post at half two in the morning and as i'm often up half the night know you must be going  through it so wanted to reply to your post.  

As i said i really don't know much about this but what tests have you had done?  Have you seen a recurrent miscarriage specialist?  Had your immunes tested?  You have probably had every test under the sun but maybe there are other things that can be investigated which others will know more about.

I don't know anything about surrogacy but i know that money and costs are something that i am really worried about and it sends me into a real panic, but as my therapist and one of my brothers keep telling me i have to live in the moment.... don't know if that makes sense but i catastrophise about things a year down the line...... e.g. never working again, losing my house etc.....and i really need to rein myself back in as who knows what the f**k will happen....i might win the lottery tomorrow, or get run over by a bus....extremes i know, but i guess we, on this rollercoaster, really need to think about NOW.  The alternative of not doing/having tx is probably not something we want to live with so we have to live in the present moment and try not to leap ahead....every journey starts with a single step and we really need to take only one step at a time.

I really hope it doesn't sound like i'm lecturing or preaching, to be honest, i'm trying to believe my own advice right now.  Just wanted you to hopefully feel that there are some options out there even if you can't see them right now.

Take care of yourself.  

GG xx


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