# Day of iui, OH not allowed in?



## Jess1976 (Jul 15, 2011)

Hi guys, first post here.Have learned lots of things from you all so thank you!

I was just wondering if its the norm for partners not to be allowed to be present for the insemination? 
It was something we hadn't spoken to the clinic about as we were under the impression it wouldn't be a problem. But on the morning I was asked to wait in a room while my wife had iui. I was devastated as I really would have liked to have done this together. It was very painful for her and I was really annoyed that I wasn't able to hold her hand to help easethe stress and very upset not to be included in it. 
In all my reading up on iui information I hadn't seen anyone say their oh had been asked to wait elsewhere.


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## scooter5 (Jan 22, 2013)

I can obviously only speak from my own experience but my husband absolutely always comes in with me - I would hate to do it without him being there and I know that he would be gutted to miss it.  Did they give you a reason why you were not allowed in?  It seems very strange - aside from the fact that it can be painful, it is certainly nerve racking.  It could also (fingers crossed) be the cycle which works so of course you would both want to be present at such an important moment.  I completely understand why you are upset/annoyed.  I would speak to the clinic and ask them why they have that rule and whether there's a way round it.  

Best of luck to you both, stay positive and try to enjoy the next stage together.


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## Jess1976 (Jul 15, 2011)

Thank you for your reply Sooter5.
They said it was to keep the area as sterile as possible and the less people in there the easier it would be to do this. I was surprise as it hasn't been discussed with us at all and I was allowed to attend all the scans etc beforehand.
we are a ss couple so with me not having a biological link to a baby we hopefully will conceive it was very important for me to be included in this particular part of our journey. I would have thought that having the two of us at the insemination would have meant my wife would be more relaxed and that would very important. I do understand the sterility side of things but was just shocked.

Well hopefully in a few weeks this wont matter and we will be on a different path in our journey. 

If we have to go again I will bring it up with the clinic and see if the rule can be relaxed.


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## hilly35 (Feb 14, 2012)

Jess - just to let you know on all 3 of my cycles my dh was there and I would have struggled if he wasn't. I would definitely argue that the next time. Fingers crossed they let you in to support your partner. Good luck


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## Monkey07 (Jul 8, 2012)

Jess my DW was allowed in with me, she had to wear some very attractive blue bag thingies over her shoes but that was it! I would definitely question it if you have to to again, I'm not gonna lie I found it painful as I have a shy cervix (haha!) so there was a fair amount of hand squeezing going on, plus it was nice after as they left us alone for ten mins and we just stared at each other and both said "argh this could actually be happening". Wishing you lots of luck on your journey xx


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## Jess1976 (Jul 15, 2011)

Thanks guys.
Thankfully we managed a BFP on our first try! 
I will mention it to the clinic when we finish up with them as I would hate for another couple to get caught like that. I was absolutely devastated for the 2ww. The bfp did help me get over it a wee bit though.  

My wife had a horrible time of it and it made me feel so guilty for not being there to help distract her. Plus they left her own her own to relax for 15 mins and still left me in the other room waiting! 
But anyhoo, we are facing the next stage of our journey and hopefully everything will be the two of us together for the rest.


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## Tiny21 (Jul 24, 2007)

My DIUIs were a while back and OH could have come in but would have probably passed out so tended to be just me and the nurse but he was welcome in!! Surprised at that tbh. Partners can come in for Embryo transfers usually and are encouraged to and that is slightly more of a process than IUI. 

Sorry you couldn't go in, good luck


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