# Single Inbetweenies



## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Hi - not sure if I'm the only one or there are a few of us who are 'inbetween' treatments or just having a wee break from it all and a bit flummoxed by everything so far?

I know I'm at a major crossroads as to whether to continue or not or think seriously about adoption.  Feel like I've hit a brick wall in some ways - but also enjoying not having to cycle, take meds, inject etc too.....

Hope everyone else who's in-between or trying to find the best way forward are all ok.

     

Tis xx


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## Mellie289 (Dec 9, 2011)

I'm in the middle of a IUI cycle, but I just came off a 6 month wait. Four of those months, I had poor test results and spent another two taking supplements and trying to improve them. It was nice not to obsess about TTC in that time, but it was never far from my mind. I'm committed to trying at least two more IUIs if necessary, then I'll take another break to figure out what to do and to save money for the next step. I haven't quit hit the brick wall yet, but not moving forward for so long because of my REs advice to wait was really tough.

I hope you enjoy the break and relax, and especially take care of yourself! It's at least a nice time that you can put yourself first instead of trying to get pregnant as the top priority.


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## karenstar (Jan 27, 2012)

Hello. I'm also an inbetweener, awaiting a hysterosalpingogram before probably continuing with some more IUIs. Trying the NHS route and hoping it will only be 2 or 3 months. Not keen on waiting but trying to think of other things to focus on in the mean time and the £380 I will save.

Hugs to all.
Karen


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## SophieBlue (Apr 17, 2011)

Hi All
I'm also in betweenies club.
I just has bfn from my 1st IVF at Lister and now I'm thinking about other options: I have a follow up consultation at Lister on 28th June and I am also going to Serum 22/23 June for immunes tests/ consultation and and have hysteroscopies done so fingers crossed this should improve my chances and I hope the learn more why it didn't work. Than I'm hoping to do 2nd IVF in August/ September.

This is such an emotional journey, it's like climbing Everest one step at the time and so many unpredictable circumstances to overcome.

Strangely I feel positive and stronger knowing that I still have some other avenues to explore.

Hope the weather improves this weekend.
have a good weekend everyone  
Take care
Sophie xx


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## silverbird (Aug 8, 2011)

Hi Thesis, Karenstar and Sophie,

I was actually thinking of starting a "ladies in waiting" type thread myself!

I'm waiting till July when I can start IVF again.


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

thought there might be a few of us that are in limbo or inbetween.  I was booked in for treatment in September but have decided to cancel - timing isn't quite right at the moment for me.


But a girly holiday to Turkey did lift my spirits no end! 


    to you all Tis xx


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## Elle72 (Mar 13, 2012)

Hi Thetis,
I thought I join you in here, my first ICSI just failed so am in between aswell.
I am a bit overwhelmed and tired and wish -I was younger to have more time to think!
Looking at treatment abroad aswell, I am very confused!

xxx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Massive hugs honey - blimming hard journey.  I've Been struggling with the next steps tbh. Thinking if I did try I may try Serum as an option. I've already had the  initial consult via email & hidden c test there.

Hope you find a clinic you're truly happy with and a bfp swiftly follows 

Tis xx


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## lulumead (May 29, 2008)

Good idea for a thread Tis.    


Just popping on to send everyone lots of    . Its quite exhausting this malarkey at times.  Wishing you all swift BFP's once/if treatment under way again.



Tis, PM if I can be of any help   


xx


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## Elle72 (Mar 13, 2012)

Hi Thetis and Lulu, thanks.
I was also trying to consider serum, had some email exchange in may aswell and might just go and have a consult. I am also trying to understand whether it would be safer to have DE or not. In a way I just can't bare to be sick anymore, it's exhausting...
Early days anyway, wish greece was closer!!

xxx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

me too I'm in limbo - exhausted trying to find a surrogate so may have one last go at DE somewhere if they'll accept my dodgy uterus- Serum is where I am in conversation with, they'd need to do a hysteroscopy and evaluate if they could do anything for it, but  they close for August and booked up before.


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## smc81 (Oct 26, 2011)

Hi Ladies
I don't know if I am an inbetweenie or not because I really don't know what to do at the moment. 2 weeks ago my cycle was abandoned due to overstim  -this was because the clinic 'lost' my notes, then found them the next day so I was 2 days off course so they doubled my menopur injections (for DIUI). This caused me to overstim. Had I had the original plan of 3 injections I would most probably have been ok. I have written a 2 page letter of complaint, and got back 2 paragraphs with no real reference to what happened, just a load of meaningless twaddle. I don't see why I should pay for that cycle so am complaining again to someone else but right now I don't know whether to go ahead with my next cycle, I just don't have the cash at the moment and my growing credit card bill means that I don't really want to pay for it that way. Basically I think they should pay for that cycle as it was their fault they had to change my treatment. But also, I don't feel confident at all that these people are doing their jobs properly and do I really want to hand over more cash for them to make more mistakes.

I am so down about all this. Plus I have PCOS, and it's making things so much harder. And even though I have asked for metformin as I think it would really help, the nurse told me the dr would have given it me if he thought I needed it, despite the fact that he told me, and the nurse told me that I needed to lose weight. I have tried everything and it makes no difference what I eat, I can't lose more than about a pound in a month.

Sorry for the rant, I just feel like no one at the hospital is listening to me and it's really getting me down.

Sarah x


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## Elle72 (Mar 13, 2012)

Ouch Smc I am so sorry for what happened to you.   
I completely agree you should not pay for the cycle as they also put your health in danger increasing dosage for their incompetence.
You should try to stay as calm as you can and see what are the steps not to pay or to get your money back.
I am sure they really did a bad thing to overstimulate you.

If I were you I would file a complaint to the proper authority and claim what happened and claim damages as well.

I would  also go to my GP if I need any meds for PCOS try to put sense in him/her.
I have been to the A&E myself yesterday and they were useless as usual, last time it happened the only person who helped me was my GP.

After all this I would definitely change clinic, but I would take a moment, a month or so to recover, phisically and mentally.


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

JJ - fingers and toes crossed that Serum can wave their magic wand... I do know a surrogate, she's pregnant at the moment for a family - but more than happy to find out further info for you??


SMC - what a carry on!  Hope you get some answers soon.    


Take care everyone


Tis xx


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## jenjen1 (Oct 2, 2011)

Just thought I'd post a quick not to Sarah as I was shocked to hear how the clinic messed up. Else is right, you should seek advice as to what you can claim. What is important is that they admit their mistake ( which they must have done is you were aware they mislaid your notes). try to write down everything that happened during that cycle so if you want to issue a claim you can later on. 

Also as for your PCOS, you are entitled to help on the nhs. It depends where you are but if you have a friendly helpful GP, (if you don't get another one), to refer you to a consultant in that area. Mine for example, Mr Nikolaou at the Chelsea & Westminster, specializes in this. I only have it slightly. One you are referred they will treat you on the nhs. This may make time but then time is on your side because of your age. In a few years they may have even resolved the matter of nhs funded IVF for single women.

As for your weight problem, that is a side effect of genuine pcos. Again a consultant may be able to help. 

You may have already thought of the above but I thought I'd add my thoughts. Good luck!
Jen xx


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## Mellie289 (Dec 9, 2011)

Well, here I am in between again, as I expected I'd be during my last cycle. I've spent the last week processing my failed IUI #6 and thinking really hard of DE IVF at Serum after one more try. My medicated IUI was a total flop with a single dominant follicle. I wish I had the problem of overstimming - but that's still horrid how they messed up your cycle, Sarah. I hope you get credited for that cycle so you can try again.

I'm hoping to use some time now to lose some more weight and get in better shape before I try again (maybe in September).  I've just lost about 25 of the 45 pounds I gained from a hypothyroid problem through a combination of exercise and diet of just lean meat, fruits and vegetables -- no potatoes, dairy (except some yogurt) or anything made with flour, and not drinking my calories anymore, unless it's a protein smoothie (no soft drinks, juice or wine). It's really tough to do, but it has been working, so I'll keep at it with a few days off here and there. I haven't spoken with my RE yet about the arrival of AF as I was on holiday, but I'm hoping we can improve my protocol for the next IUI.


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## smc81 (Oct 26, 2011)

Thanks to everyone for their kind words. I spoke to PALS today and they advised me to complain again, this time to the complaints dept. I already write the letter at the weekend do I posted that this afternoon. My AF arrived yesterday - on day 25 so not really very good - and I've decided to try treatment again. My head was saying no, but my heart yes so I decided to go against what I normally do and follow my heart this time. I've got a day 2 scan tomorrow to check all follicles have gone but my guy days it won't be good news, but I have to at least try. 

The clinic were less than helPaul on the phone today again so I am seriously considering going private after this cycle. I've had enough really.

Good luck to everyone, whatever happens.
Sarah xx


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## Elle72 (Mar 13, 2012)

Hi Sarah, 
try to relax as much as you can for this cycle, send that letter and then forget about it for a little bit, hopefully much more than a little bit.

  

As for me I have a question for the inbetweniees and everyone else really, what was your reaction after your first failed cycle?
Am I normal after not even a week to have already contacted 3 clinics and want to get over with it?
Am I too anxious and not thinking clearly, should I wait and relax and decide in a couple of months?

I feel so tired, nervouse, anxious and poor!!


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

i had a miscarriage on my first cycle so was tied up with grief and also TTC asap again. I think that being kind to yourself and time is important as I came crashing down when I was back stImming 6 weeks later, which was way too early for me I know now,as I fully thought that I would get pregnant again and miscarriage would be my battle- how wrong I was!.

I think by researching and approaching other clinics you feel that you are doing something useful about TTC again.
Good Luck


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## jenjen1 (Oct 2, 2011)

JJ, as soon as I was discharged from hospital, overcome from grief after my loss, I had to wrestle some control back so I started preparing to try to make sure what happened didn't happen again and when I could try again. The first thing I did was get in the internet and search for the best consultant to help me, then ring up my GP from Switzerland, where I was, to get a referral. The referral was easy and quick but I was told I would need an operation which would delay an IVF attempt by another few months. For me, that was torture. In all I had to wait nearly 5 months.

The doctors don't seem to think that months matter but to us it seems like an age. Now I am finally on my 2ww and everyday I am scared that I'm going to get a bfn next week and fail. I want this more than anything and will keep trying until I am told I can no longer have my own baby. 

I am seeing a psychologist referred to by my GP as didn't want issues with ttc after my loss which of course there are, but it helps as this is a very stressful time, particularly as we are handling it on our own.

Sorry for venting but hope it helps.

Elle, I think what you are doing is only natural, trying to regain some control after failed cycle.

Take care, Jen xxx


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## Elle72 (Mar 13, 2012)

Hi inbetweenies,
Today I feel awful sad, blue, nostalgic, pessimistic and angry.
No particular reason but I feel my life as a complete failure...I thought moaning a bit here could do me good, sorry girls.
I need something good to happen, am scared I am not able to appreciate anything life has to offer, I am too tired.
Maybe I'll just go and have some chocolate...
xxx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

How's my fellow inbe's doing?


Am up and down like a yo-yo at the mo... blimming hormones!  Next time I'm coming back as a man   


Anyway - thinking of everyone


Have a lovely weekend


Tis xx


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## Sima (Aug 10, 2008)

Hi Thetis and everyone else

I'm fine.  Just enjoying the sunshine and watching some of the Olympics on tv.  I'm not a huge sports fan but I have to say I have been caught up in the moment and I will miss the Olympics when it goes.

So, I'm still getting over my latest BFN.  I'm still no further forward in deciding on a plan of what to do next.  But to tell you the truth I am enjoying not thinking about all things fertility.  So my current plan is to have a month (or two) off, enjoy what there is left of the summer and generally chill out.

Have a lovely weekend.

S x


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

What a gorgeous day!


How's my fellow inbetweenies doing??  


Am getting ready for my holibobs ... time to escape the rat race again.


Tis x


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Thetis have a wonderful time and enjoy yourself- where are you off to?
L x


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Turkey again - a friend has an apartment there and has kindly let me and my nutty friend have it for free! Can't wait, although its a wee bit hotter there than it was May time.


Hope you're ok and having a fun packed weekend - do love reading about your weekends.


Tis xx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Thetis hope that you have a well deserve rest and guaranteed sun!!!
My weekends aren't that thrilling!! i'm also doing housework and laundry today xx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Believe you me - they always sound exciting   


Housework this end - getting summer stuff out of the loft ready to pack.


xx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

When do you move Thetis? xxx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Start new job end of October - but will keep house here and travel at weekends.


Think this move is probably a blessing in disguise - job was getting me down and needed a change of scenery!!


How are you and your gorg wee man? 


xx


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