# Starting the journey part II



## KarenM

Hi girls

I have spoken to someone at work today who adopted a little girl about 2 years ago after having 1 go at IVF. She found the treatment so traumatic that after one attempt they went straight to adoption.

She told me about her course and the visits the social workers had to make to their home on numerous occasions. She also had to do a story book, a bit like her and her dh's history and details of their life. Anyway she told me that it took her 18 months all told. However the longest thing was waiting to get placed. As soon as they matched her and her dh with Amelia, it as only 1 more week before she moved in with them. They had had a number of pre-meetings with her and her foster carer before the match was finalised. I can't believe how quick it all was.

I am chasing up the social services team tomorrow to double check we are booked in for January. I am so looking forward to next Christmas (I have everything crossed things will be in place by then).

Deb - sorry to hear your result, but it would be great if you could join me. Justine - that book hasn't arrived yet but I have been promised it for this week.

Love
Karen x


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## kylepaul

hi karen/girls,
its good that you know someone who has been through the adoption procedure.i`m sure you will have loads of questions to ask!
it does sound very quick!
we go to our meeting in january too.
my only concern is how our,not so little boy(8 on xmas eve)will react when we finally tell him that we want to adopt!?he is always asking for a baby brother or sister.
that is my main worry!
let me know if the book is any good?

have a great xmas 
all the best

love justine


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## Mummytoone

Hi Karen and Justine

I am just so excited for both of you, it must be such a wonderful feeling knowing you will be a Mummy and Daddy to someone who doesnt have one. I wonder who they will be!!!!!!!!
I will definatly do the same if IVF doesnt work for me, but i feel I have to have a good go at IVF first to cover all avenues.
Justine Im sure your little boy will like the idea of a new brother or sister. Children can sometimes be very suprising, especialy if I knows it will be someone to play with his toys with! 

This time next year girls....... i wonder who will be opening there presents from their new Mummy and Daddy??  

Lots of luck

Lou xxx


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## lydia

Hi everyone, 
we to are going to try and adopt, I have posted on this adopted site before so i am sorry if I repeat myself.
I also have a son who will be eight on the 23rd December, We have told him a little bit about what is happening but it is hard as we are unsure how long the process will take.
We have attended all our group meetings now and are waiting to be allocated a Social Worker who will do our home visits.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders now that we have decided to go with adoption rather than icsi ( no more needles hooray! ).
The meetings were really interesting but were more catered for fostering rather than adoption. 
The majority of people who wanted to adopt had been through fertility treatment so we all had something in common.
It would be great if we could keep in touch and all help each other through the process, I know I shouldn't but I keep thinking how different next Christmas may be.
Anyway good luck to everyone
Tracey

I use Lydia as it is my lucky charm, it was my nana's name.


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Firstly Happy New Year!!.

Well my secret is out. All of our friends now know. I was asked on New Years Eve when it was going to be my turn, whilst I was sat with one of my firends who knows and her 2 month old little boy. A shook, the bottom lip trembled and then I calmly said "Rich and I can't have children, but next year we are adopting two". I was so glad to see the back of 2002 and we all raised our glasses at midnight to 2003 and all that it will bring. I am so glad that my friend was there as she helped me keep it all together.

At the party, there were another couple who are about to adopt a little girl. They have two boys, but they have told her that it would be dangerous for her to conceive again. They started to put the feelers out in July last year. They got security clearance by October and were asked to go on a course in October too. Unfortunately they were on holiday when the letter came so they couldn't make the session. They are doing their course in January and have already had all the visits done. Their Social Worker says that it will be 6 weeks at the earliest following their course, but that it won't be any later than July, so a year all told. She did say to me that when they first started they were shown a photo list of all the children available. She said she was staggered to see how many there actually were.

Well my book hasn't arrived, but I did get chance before I broke up for Xmas to talk to a girl at work who has ben through adoption and I spoke to another girl whose dh is a Social Worker and I have got some literature. To be honest I was going to look at it over Xmas, but I have mde the most of what could potentially be our last Xmas as just a couple.

Bring on 2003. Only 18 more days until my first meeting.

Good luck everyone
Love
Karen x


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## SueL

Hi Karen

You sound so positive and happy!

You like a lot of us will be glad to see the back of 2002, this is going to be your year and our year!

Good luck for your first "session", not long now!!!!

It's so exciting!

Love Sue
xxxxxxxxx


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## Sue MJ

Karen,

You're so brave - I just wept at your post just then. People just don't realise what they are asking sometimes.

It sounds to me though that you are extremely positive and you will be great adoptive parents!

I'm with you on booting out 2002 - the only thing is I've had such high expectations for 2003 that it's scaring me now!

Take care,

Lots of Love,

Sue


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## Mel

Karen,

It was so good to read your post - it put a tear in my eye, but a happy one, you will make the most wonderful of parents and i cant wait for the day that you say you have your daughter/son 's. 

Have a very happy new year Karen and Dh 

Lots love

Mel

x x


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## *Kim*

Karen 

Your post choked me too. You have been really positive and brave about all this. You will make a wonderful mother and i know we shouldnt wish our lives away but i hope the time speeds by for you.
I will look forward to reading your posts when you and Rich are mummy and daddy.

A very Happy New Year to you both.

Love Kim


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## katey

Hi all, im going down the same path as you all.
Mines another long story, prob like every body elses. We have done the vasectomy reversals, the ivf, the iui. We got pregnant from first ivf but sadly lost our son at 22 wks.
We decided to try adoption over 2 yrs ago, but its so slow, it was 12 months before we saw a social worker.
We are hopefully going to panel in march, but there always seems to be something to slow it down.
We just hope we dont have to spend another xmas on our own also.
gd luck to you all. IF you want to ask any questions bout the process, feel free.
Bev
x


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## Vicky W

Hi everyone

Happy New Year to all!

I am thrilled you are all very positive about adoption and wish you all the best for 2003. 

Sorry it's taking a long time for you & dh, Bev. Such a shame because the children waiting for adoption are getting older too, without a loving Mum & Dad in their lives. 

I was just wondering, we haven't ever considered adoption but it might be a route we choose one day, if our IF tx doesn't work out.

Can anyone tell me are there age limits generally to adoption and can you adopt when one partner already has children?

Any advice would be appreciated!

Thanks & lotos of love

Vicky


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## katey

Vikcy,
My hubby has children from his first marriage and its not been a problem. They do go and see the ex and the kids though, but luckily for us it all went ok.
Do you mean your age or age of kids?
Bev
x


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## Vicky W

Hiya Bev

Scarey thought Social Services going to see dh's ex! Anything to co-operate with us is usually avoided!

But that's another story!

DH kids are 14 & 16 and lovely so that wouldn't be a problem!

Actually I was thinking about dh age - he is nearly 43, I am 33. Hopefully we've got another couple of years trying ICSI but if that doesn't work, he could be in late 40's before we got to the adoption process.

I thought I heard somewhere you could not adopt beyond a certain age.

Any thoughts?

Love Vicky


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## katey

Vicky,
some areas have different ideas on ages of adoptors. Our social worker said usually mid 40's, but again i think it depends on the age you want to adopt.
My hubbys kids are nearly 13 and nearly 16. 13 yr old daughter came to live with us last yr which caused loads of probs with ex. This put our adoption on hold, then she decided to go back home and put it on hold again.
Ours has been drawn out with that, but hopefully coming to and end now, hopefully going to panel in March.
Depends how long it takes to find the right match then, but we hoping it will be this year - fingers crossed.

When you plan to try icsi?
Bev
x


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## Vicky W

Thanks for your advice Bev.

I suspect dh might be considered too old for adopting younger children.

We have already had one icsi cycle, which was cancelled due to OHSS, & subsequent FET was not successful.

We are going to try FET no. 2 in Feb/Mar.

If that doesn't work, I think we will have one more attempt at icsi.

I really hope everything goes well for you this year. It is very hard when one partner has children already and the other doesn't.

Good luck & keep in touch with your progress..

Love 

Vicky


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## katey

Vicky,
Its not easy is it the ivf roller coaster. To be honest the adoption one can be just as bad, just hope both you and i get something out of it!
I did find it difficult at first that dh had kids already and felt he probably didnt want them as much as me, but i now know thats wrong. I can tell, when we go out, how he looks at kids. Think cos we lost Jack it kind of hit home to him.
DOnt think your hubby would be to old, you can only try. If you decide to go for adoption, they tell you all the pros and cons. You can say you want older children cos you could get a sibling group. I said i wasnt bothered about a baby, toddler would be better, but i would be pretty pleased if we got a baby.
Good luck with yr FET.
Bev
x


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## Bev H

Hi Girls
Hope you don't mind me butting in here! Garry and I are both 39, have been together for 5 years. 8 failed IVF attempts, so adoption is something we have discussed. I am being totally ignorant here so pls. excuse me - where do you begin, who do you call? Is it the local social services or? 
I haven't discussed this with anybody and don't know anybody who has gone through this so would GREATLY appreciate any info.
I wish you every success and know that you'll be brilliant parents just from reading your stories.
Take care and good luck.
Love Bev H 
p.s. was the book any good?


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## KarenM

Bev

Hope you had a good time in Aus. How long is it before Garry comes home?

I rang my local council Social Services department. What they do is invite you for an open evening to talk through the process. Mine is 20th Jan. You then sign up to say that you are interested in following the adoption route. You then get assigned a social worker and get your security clearance and home visit checks done. There is also a course that you have to do. Then you have to go to panel to be approved and then they start to look for a placement for you (that's how I understand it anyway - I think I have got it in the right order).

I have been told that if I sign up in January we should get to panel for about the end of May beginning of June and that it could then take anything from 6 weeks to 6 months to find a placement. it just depends on the age of the child and the conditions surrounding the adoption order e.g. could be longer if they are subject to a care order etc etc.

The book sadly still hasn't arrived, Amazon are having trouble ordering it, but they have said they should have it by the end of the month. In the meantime, I have got some course literature from a girl I work with who has adopted. I only got it today though so haven't had chance to read it yet.

The other issue for me is that I live on a county border. So geographically I am in one county but postal address wise, I am in another. What my social service department said is that I can only register to do the course with one council, but that on completion and approval, that they all have access to children in neighbouring authorities.

A good website to look at is http://www.baaf.org.uk//[url]. The...ith whatever you decide to do.
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Dear Karen
Thank you for your very helpful reply. I will certainly call the Social Services and see when and if they have an open-evening. Garry comes home on Feb 27th for 6 days! Then he goes back to The Falklands until May 12th. So at least if we find out when the meeting is we can perhaps go along and sign-up?? How are you feeling about it all, it must be exciting and scary at the same time! I hope all goes well for you both on 20th Jan. Will look forward to hearing all about it.
Lots of love and good wishes Bev H xx


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## kylepaul

hi karen,
just got back from a skiing holiday in bulgaria!it was great just what the doctor ordered!!!
got my invitation to adoption evening,its on this wednesday 15th!
very nervous.
hope you r well?let u know what happens on wednesday night.
bye
justine xxx


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## Bev H

Hi Justine
We haven't chatted before but I wanted to wish you lots of luck for Wednesday, we may be going on the adoption journey so I have been chatting with Karen.
Glad you had a good holiday and Happy New Year!
Love from Bev H 
not to be confused with the other Bev on here but I must say hello to you too - Hi Bev!!


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## KarenM

Hi Justine

Glad to hear that you had a good holiday. Skiing is not my thing but it sounds like you have blown the cobwebs away.

Good luck for Wednesday, and don't forget to post and let me know what happens. I go a week today!!! very excited.

Bev - I will copy all that stuff today for you and send it.

Bye for now
love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Thanks for the info - I have sent you an IM.
Love from Bev H xxx


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## Bev H

Justine
Hope the meeting went well last night - would be interested to hear about it - if that's not too nosey of course?!!?
Love from Bev H x


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## KarenM

Hi girls

Bev - no problem. Hope it was useful for you. I'll let you know how Monday goes and what happens.

Justine - hope all went well yesterday. Would love to hear about it.

Take care
Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Karen

GOOD LUCK ON MONDAY!! ^thumbsup^
I have been on 2 websites today and have registered with both so should receive their info packs in the next couple of weeks. At least then I'll have that to show to Garry when he comes home (5 weeks and 4 days to go).

Have a great weekend and speak to you next week.

Love from Bev H xx


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## kylepaul

hi karen/bev,
meeting went well on wed.
lasted 2 hours!
gave all the info that u could think of.
when u start the process ,they do a thorough check on u,passport,driving licence,marriage cert,birth cert check with employer check that u earn what u say u earn etc!!!
you go on a 2 or 3 day course.10 home visits from social worker.they pay for medicals and solicitor if adoption is contested,u pay £140 for court cost for adoption.
takes 6-12 months
so much was spoken about u were given a questioaire at the end if u fill it out & send it back that starts the process going.
goodluck for yours karen hope this was useful!!!
bye love justine xxx


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## katey

Justine, glad to see things are moving for you. My sw was telling me that they have to turn cases around within a certain time limit now under the new guidelines.
We are due to go to panel in March, but its been a long road and one i will be glad to get to the end of.
We are seeing our sw tomorrow for an health and safety check and to see if she has any questions from writing up our report. Then we just have to see if we are approved then wait for the right match.
Good luck and stick with out, cos it can be a roller coaster like ivf. Anything you want to know, just ask.
Hows everyone else doing?
Bev
x


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## Bev H

Dear Justine/Bev

Thanks for your messages - both are very encouraging particularly the news of the new guideline in turning the process around much quicker! We can't do too much at the moment with Garry away but at least I'm getting info. together which I hope will help me understand everything that bit more!
Good luck to you both and thanks again.

KAREN - hope today goes well for you both xxxxx ^thumbsup^

Love from Bev H xxx


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## KarenM

Hi Justine, Bev and Bev.

Justine and Bev - thanks for the info it really helps to put things into perspective about what we can expect. We are off for our first meeting tonight so I have got today off to make sure that I would be home in enough time and I'm sat reading some stuff waiting for the carpet fitter to arrive. trying to get the house ship shape before anyone comes to assess us!

Bev H - thanks for your kind wishes. I hope you are finding all the info of great use. Some of the stuff my friend Emma has lent me is very bizarre. I was reading a booklet on behaviour last night and reading some of the things they recommend to remedy bad behaviour is very strange.

I'll post later when I get back.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## KarenM

Hi all

you are not going to believe this, but they have cancelled our introduction meeting and the next one is not until 24th March  so I have yet more waiting to do. This is so frustrating. they are calling out for adoptive families and then can't run and introduction evening. 

I am going to call our neighbouring social services department tomorrow and see if they can see us any sooner.

I'll keep yoou posted.
Love
Karen x


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## Debbie

Hi girls

Hope you don't mind me joining you but we have decided to find out more about adoption.

Bev H - I read from your post that you registered with a couple of web-site for info packs, if you could let me have them that would be great.

Karen - So sorry your intro was postponed as you say it is so frustrating hope your neighbouring ss can help.

Justine & Bev - Just wanted to say Hi!!

Thanks for letting me join you girls!!

Love Debbie x


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## Bev H

Dear Karen
I was flabbergasted to read your message what a let down for you both. Good luck with the other ss. I must say when I rang last week (to a central adoption centre - stupidly I have left the number at work) they told me that you can adopt from anywhere in the UK. Now I fully understand that you probably want to be fairly local etc. but if this means that things can be hurried along perhaps it might be worth your while calling the number. I will send it to you tomorrow anyway. Keep your pecker up  I know it's frustrating!! 
Talk to you soon.Love Bev H xxxx

Debbie - Hi
The two sites that I looked at and were very helpful are
www.baaf.org.uk
www.adoption.org.uk
Have a look it's full of info. and seeing some of the children on there inspires you to want to do it even more. Good luck and keep in touch. 

Hi to Justine & Bev, how are you doing?

Love to you all, Bev H xxxx


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## katey

Karen, sorry, but i do believe and know exactly what you are going through. We enquired about adoption in Oct 2000 and nagged and nagged before we went on training the following March. We then waited another 6 months before starting the home visits. It is frustrating cos we, like you thought of all those children that are waiting for homes, yet they keep us waiting all this time. Our sw is dragging her feet now bout going to panel. Our report was supposed to have been written over Christmas and guess what, it wasnt. Shes now trying to rush it to go through in March but no promises. 
I cant count the number of appts we have had cancelled/postponed.
But, keep at it, im sure we will all get what we want eventually.
PS its tomorrow our sw comes to do our catch up and Health and Safety check, will let you know how we get on.
Does anyone go on the chats on here?
Bev
x


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## sophie

Hello

just wanted to pop over here to let you know about a friend of mine who has had endless frustration, cancelled meetings, hopes raised only to be later dashed etc whilst on the adoption journey but .........
in less than a month she will have her new children living with her!!!!

It has been worth it for her and it will be worth for you all on this thread when you get your lovely bambinos. I'm afraid I don't know much about the processes except that it does seem to be an uphill battle all the way - but definitely one worth fighting!

S
x


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## Bev H

Bev 
Hope the visit by the sw goes ok today and then at least you can go forward, it must be terrible having appts./meetings continually cancelled. I wish you well and would like to keep in touch if that's ok.

Sophie - thank you for your message of support and inspiration, much needed by all accounts!

Love to everybody else, take care and catch up soon, Love Bev H xxxx


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## Bev H

Bev
Silly me - forgot to say, I haven't been in the "chat room" perhaps we should try to meet there one evening? Let me know and you Karen, Justine and Debbie - and of course any others!!!
Love Bev H


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## KarenM

Hi girls

Well hopefully we are back on the road again. I finished work early today and came home to ring our neighbouring authority (Wolverhampton) and they were fantastic. They couldn't believe that our County (Shropshire) had cancelled the open evening. They actually work things differently, whereas with Shropshire, you are invited to an open evening and if interested, fill out the forms. In Wolverhampton, they send you an information packs and the forms so there is no need to attend an open evening. What they then do, is on receipt of the forms, they assign you a social worker and they arrange to come and see you. Provided that all parties are happy then things can progress. She said it would take about 9 months for all the checks to be done, for us to complete the course, for all the social worker visits to be completed (10 in all) and then for us to go to panel. Once approved by panel it will then be how soon they could find a match. But the good news (or not) is that they have lots of babies. So I can't wait to get the forms. I have also had an e-mail tonight to say that my book on adoption has been dispatched so I will probably be reading alot this weekend.

Hope everyone else is doing ok. Feeling a bit more positive again now.

TTFN
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Good Morning Karen 
That's more like it - I like action!! I am so pleased that your persistance has paid off!! Well done!! I hope you enjoy reading all the info. I received my info pack from BAAF today and there's so much to read and look through - lots of lovely children there looking at us with those lovely big eyes, I want them all!!!!
So, I too will be reading up, although I am off to Manchester for a "girlie weekend" and it's not material to read on the train really....?!!!
Thanks for keeping us up to date - happy reading!! Speak to you all again soon on here Love Bev H xxxxxx


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## KarenM

Hi girls

Bev H - the forms should be here today and so I am going to fill them out straight away. My book also arrived yesterday from Amazon (I ordered it in November) and I read nearly half of it last night and it is really interesting.

If you are interested, it is called "The Adoption Experience - Families Who Give Children a Second Chance" by Ann Morris. It is £11.95.

If you order it through Amazon though, go through the link on this site as it gives a donation to FF.

I'll let you know what these forms ask for when i get them.

Hope you are still keeping positve and that you are getting ready for Garry to come home 

bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Thanks for the info - sounds like you got a busy weekend ahead of you! Me too but for other reasons - meeting up with some friends for a mad weekend in Manchester - better do these things whilst you can!! 
I have ordered the book so will look forward to that.

Have a great weekend everybody.
Love from Bev H xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Bev H

Hope you had a good weekend in Manchester. The forms arrived on Saturday, I completed them as soon as they got here and posted them back same day. I even replaced the second class stamp they had put on the envelope with a first class one so it gets there sooner!!

The questions were relatively straight forward. i.e. name address for last 5 years, DoB, nationality, religion. The there were things like, have we told family, do we have any pets, what would happen if there was an emergency with the child such as illness, and that was about it.

I've nearly finished the book now. It is really interesting. I have started to be optimistic about the whole experience, but the book makes you realise that there are some all to real things that could happen, so I'm not looking at it all now from rose coloured glasses.

Catch up with you sometime this week.
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Thanks for your message - I'd be exactly the same with the forms in sending them straight back in order to speed things up!!  
Had a great weekend and have returned today to find lots of great news on the threads, i.e. Jac and Deborah.
Will catch up with you later on. Love Bev H xxx


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## Bev H

Hi Karen I am sooooo excited!! I received some information this morning about "Information Days" and they offered me 2 dates. Well, one of them is when Garry is home so that will be on Tuesday 4th March.  
I have completed the necessary forms and returned them in the lunchtime post and added my own 1st class stamp, just like you!!
Any news at your end? 
How is everyone else? 
Love to you all, Love Bev H xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Bev

That's great news, not long now until Garry comes home either. The time will fly by and before you know it it will be here. Which area are you in Bev?

No news from this end yet. The forms should be there now, but you know what bureaucracy is like in these places it will probably take a while to filter through the system. I feel alot more positive now we have made the initial step even if it is just filling in the forms.

Has your book arrived yet? I hope you don't have to wait as long as me. It took nearly 2 months to come. But having said that it is very useful regardless of what stage in the process you are at.

Bev and Justine, how are you doing too?

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
We live in Hampshire. So I have sent my forms back to them.
My book isn't here yet . Wanted to read it this weekend and as it's snowing would be a good time to stay indoors or build a ^snowman^ ^snowman^ or two?
Spoke to Garry a couple of times yesterday and he sounds really excited and positive about everything which is fantastic news - he wasn't sure about adoption, wanted his own etc. as we all do, but hey if we get to become parents this way then that's just as rewarding.
Take care Karen, speak soon, Love Bev H


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## KarenM

Bev

Just read back my message and realised how thick I must look. Of course I know where you live as I have got your address!!   

I'm glad Garry is feeling positive about it all. Rich was surprisingly negative about the prospect of having treatment, not convinced given the low success rate that it was worth it, but now....... I can't believe the transformation. He has even volunteered to give up work and be a house husband (he's a kept man!!) and he seems to be making more plans than me and even dragged me into Mothercare the other weekend to price up what we might need!!!

I take it by the ^snowman^ ^snowman^ that you have lots of snow down south. Where I am in the Midlands we have had none, although neighbouring towns have had a sprinkling.

Got to go and ring Rich as he is working away at the moment, back tomorrow and then away again for most of the next month, home at weekends.

Take care
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Well, we are both thickos!! I too forgot you had my address, I think we must lose a few brain cells going through all this stuff!!!
Wow, how great that Rich is so excited about it all. Sorry he's working away, I can totally sympathise with you on that one. Now and again is ok but not for long periods..you do miss them don't you of course we do!!
So, the snow has disappeared and now we have very bad ice everywhere where are the gritter machines when you need them  I know this, as I have just walked home and the pavements are a nightmare, so slippery, even after 2 glasses of wine!! 
Have great weekend together and catch up with you soon.
Love from Bev H xx


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## kylepaul

to karen,bev &all the girls,
havent been on here for while.
doc has put me on clomid for 3 cycles,to double our chances as i already ovulate!
this is our very last chance there are no more treatments left after this.
we went to the adoption evening and got all the forms but they did say not to start the adoption process if you are still having fertility treatment,which i am even if it is only a couple of pills!
so we will wait to see the outcome of the clomid then go on to adoption if it doesnt work.
good luck to all of you,
karen, i hope they contact you soon & they get you started on your very exciting journey.

love justinexxx


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Well here's my news....THEY'VE RUNG and want to organise for the social worker to come and see us as soon as poss.

They are ringing me at work today, as I didn't have an up to date diary with me when I got home last night.

Bev - have you heard anything back from Hampshire?

Justine - good luck on the clomid, how manay cycles are you going through with it? In my area you have to wait 12 months between treatment and starting adoption. How long have they said you will have to leave if it doesn't work (but of course it will)?

Well it has snowed here today and Rich is working away again. I had a right panic on friday as on the travel news it said that where he was staying only the major routes were passable with care. I just freaked. I rang him and everything was fine. I just hope he can make it down there today.

Best go and get ready for work. I'll pop back later and let you know when we are seeing them.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Mummytoone

Hi Girls

Karen I cant believe how quickly things are moving along for you!!!! Its so exciting, you could be our first adoptive FF Mummy!!! Wow!

Bev - Not long now till Garry comes home, you both must be getting so excited about your adoption too. Good Luck

Justine - Good Luck for you final Chlomid cycles, you never know do you??

Love to all

Lou xxx


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## Bev H

WOW Karen 
That was soooo quick!! I bet you are excited beyond belief. I hope Rick makes it home ok??!!!!
I'll be checking in later so pls. pls. keep us updated - I am excited never mind you!!! 
No news at my end yet, and still no books. Will check with Amazon today 
GOOD LUCK KAREN XXXX

Justine, how are you? Hope the Chlomid works for you, lots of luck and love to you too.

Bye for now Love Bev H xxxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi all

Well it is all set, the 19th Feb at 10a.m. She said she will confirm all that it involves in a letter to me. They want to have a look round the house, she said don't worry about housework they would rather see a house that is lived in than a showhome!!! I will still have it looking pristine for when they come.

Bev - hope everything is ok with you. How long now on your countdown for Garry. Rich is only working away a couple of nights this week, so it's not too bad.

Lou - thanks for looking in on us. Hope everything is going ok with you. I've been looking out to see how you are getting along.

Right best get changed, it's slimming club tonight and I couldn't make it last week so I am hoping for a good loss.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


----------



## Flo

KarenM,
Delighted to see things are moving at last and that you have a date for your home visit which is not too far away.

Hope it goes well,
Flo
x


----------



## Bev H

Hi Karen
That is so soon - but wonderful news. I have been keeping Garry up dated so he was like OMG that was quick. It won't come soon enough for you I know but just think it's only 2 weeks today!!!
Garry will be home this time in 3 weeks    - he does return to The Falklands after that for about 10 weeks but at least we'll have got some info. together about adoption and they will have all our details.
Hi Justine - hope you're ok. 
Flo - hello to you too 
Keep in touch girls, lots of love Bev H xxxxx


----------



## kylepaul

to karen,bevh & girls,
thanx for the good wishes!
had first scan yesterday-2 follies! from clomid treatment.
i`ve got 3 cycles worth of tabs,if nothing from those then onto adoption.
in my area they say you must not be actively involved in fertility treatment when you start the adoption process.
so no waiting 12 months like in your area karen.
glad to hear everthing is happening fast,no waiting around for people to get back to you!!!
karen,how long did they say the whole process is likely to take?

well goodluck to you all
bye for now 
love justine xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi everyone

Justine - good luck with those 2 follies. They said that the process would take up to 12 months. Firstly all the checks and home visits and the course, will take about 5 - 6 months to complete. Then you go to panel ( not sure if this happens before or after being matched to the children?) and be approved, and then it could be 6 weeks to 6 months to be placed with the children. It just depends on the circumstances for the adoption.

Bev H - hope everything is ok with you. have you had any more information, or got the book yet?

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Hi Karen/Justine

Thanks for the update Karen, pls. keep us posted as I know you will. 
Justine, great news about your 2 follies, GOOD LUCK!! 
Have a great weekend. Love to you all. Bev H xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi girls

I know it is a while off before we are likely to have the children, but I have a sort of nesting feeling. So this weekend I have cleared out all the wardrobes (the more you have the more you hoard) so that each little one has some space for their clothes and toys. Did another recky of Mothercare at the weekend too. Up until recently I could never go in.

Bev - not long now until Garry comes home. Have you had any more info ready for 4th March? Any book yet?

Justine - hope those 2 follies are doing well. When do you test?

Everyone else - hope all is well with you.

Got to get ready for work, but I must remember which wardrobe my clothes are in now!!

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## Mummytoone

Hi Girls

KarenM, I think Im more excited reading your posts than anyone else, (no offence, everyone else!) I think your adoption journey is just so exciting. You have such happiness just round the corner waiiting for you. 
You must wonder all the time who they will be and what they will look like etc.

Keep the posts coming!!!!!!!

Love Lou xxxx


----------



## Bev H

Hi Everybody
Karen - hooray my books have just arrived here at work, so guess I'll be reading those tomorrow night as I have netball training tonight!! Sounds like you had a busy weekend - I think I'd be the same, what star sign are you??
No further news re the info day on 4/3/ so will wait and see.
Justine - how are you doing 

Have a good day, catch up soon.
Love and best wishes Bev H xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Bev

Good news about the books, which other one's did you order?

I'm an Aries, I don't know if it is in my stars, but I do have a strong organising character trait. People take the mick out of my desk and to do list's all the time. It happened to be Rich though that spurred this one on and he's a Scorpio!!

Happy reading, catch up with you soon

Love
Karen x


----------



## SueL

Hi all

I just had to butt in here!

Karen M - you're an aries and love lists and this lot take the "mick" out of me for my lists and I'm an aries and an "organiser"!!! Don't you work in HR too? 

Bev H - enjoy your netball tonight, I got back too late from a meeting to make our match 

I can't wait until you guys get "matched" to your wonderful children. Take care all and good luck!

Love Sue
xx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Lou and SueL

Thanks for popping in on us. it is really exciting isn't it. it's amazing once it all gets started how quickly things happen.

Sue - Yes it is me who works in HR, and get this I played netball for years too!!! I was GK or GD. I am sure the organising bit msut come with the job too, all those plates we have to keep spinning!

Bev - hope you had time to get into those books. I couldn't put mine down until i had read it. I'd love to know which other ones you bought and if they are any good.

Lou - hope all is going well with your IVF. I keep checking up on how you are doing and I'm just waiting to see the  next to your name.

TTFN
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Good Morning
Karen - hi, I knew you'd be an Aries or Sagittarius which is what I am, I have to have organisation in my life!
I have 2 books - "The Adoption Experience", by Ann Morris, I think you may have that one. The other is called "Considering Adoption?" will start them tonight and let you know. Only 15 more "get ups" before Garry arrives.....I am getting so excited.
Hi SueL and Lou - thanks for checking in on us, it's always nice to have support.
Best fly, work beckons, catch you tomorrow Karen!!
Take care, love Bev H xxxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Bev

Are you well and truly ensconced in those books yet? You will have to let me know what the other one is like. It's the Ann Morris one I have got, I found it real, honest and enjoyable reading.

Great news about Garry, only 14 more get ups to go now. it will soon be here, and so will 4th March 

The social worker rang yesterday and has moved our appointment forward to 9a.m. So I am going to have to get up and get moving. Only 7 more get ups until D-Day!!

I don't know if I mentioned in another post, but my assistant at work, her little boy will be 7 this year and she has been clearing out all his old toys. A few weeks ago, she brought 6 carrier bags full of toys, some not even out of their wrappers. Anyway she is off next week as it is half term, and she is going to clear out the garden, including some kiddie garden furniture and a play house. Rich doesn't know yet!! 

Justine - hope you are doing well with your two follies.

To all others who are posting too. Hope you are all well.

TTFN
Love
Karen x


----------



## Mummytoone

Karen   

Your gets ups make me laugh, I say a smiliar thing to Oliver my eldest nephew although we say bedtimes. i.e 2 more bedtimes tilll his birthday.

Karen you are gonna make a superb Mum they are gonna be very lucky children to have a Mum and Dad like you both. Its just soo exciting on this board. And you too Bev you and Garry are gonna be fab parents soon. 

Take care girls, only 7 bedtimes to go Karen 14 for you Bev!

Love Lou xxx


----------



## Bev H

Hi Girls
13 more bedtimes for me then my man will be home!  

Karen - hi, only 6 more bedtimes for you until your BIG DAY!!!!!!OMG........
I am halfway through the books - the other one "Considering Adoption" basically tells you about each stage and what to expect with a few quotes from people experiencing that particular stage. Will let you know more when I have finished it. The one by Ann Morris seems to be more "open" and "honest" as you say and gives a more personal account. What a lovely gesture by your friend, Rich will be fine about it - saves you buying those things and then you can use your money on other kiddie things!!! 

Justine - how are you? 

Talk to you again soon, much love Bev H xxx


----------



## kylepaul

hi karen& bev,
thanx for asking after me thats sooo nice of you. 
my 2 follies turned into only 1 maturing follie.so didnt get the double chance that my doc was hoping for & us!
had my 3rd scan today its still getting bigger!!
i`m on day 19 of my cycle so there goes the theory of ovulation on around day 14
go back for scan no.4 on monday,hopefully i will of ovulated by then.
keeping my fingers crossed.
i`m an aries aswell?
what a coincidence!
d-day soon be here karen-goodluck
hope you r all keeping well.
bev-garry will be here before you know it!
take care 

love justine xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Bev & Justine and everyone else

Justine - good news on your little eggie. Good luck for the scan on Monday. I am really praying it works for you. here's one of Sue MJ's reiki orange spots to send you some positive vibes.   you said you were trying three cycles weren't you. I hope you get some luck with one of them, if not how long did your social services team say you will have to wait?

Bev - glad you are enjoying the Ann Morris book. I found it written in a really readable way, not like another book I was lent. A girl from work also lent me some of the course books, but they have some very interesting theories for dealing with situations in them.

One talks about how you deal with a child who refuses to eat properly and has no table manners. It says take them to an out of town restaurant, wear something bright like a yellow shirt and green beret (their words!!) order your food and then proceed to eat messily and loudly and embarass the child. (I don't think so!)

Only 5 more get ups until our visit and only 13 more for your until Garry comes home.

I am so glad it is the weekend I'm absoloutely pooped. Rich was not able to get bookedinto any digs down in Bedford and so he has been travelling on a daily basis so early alarm calls every morning. I am planning on doing nothing, other than food shopping and having my hair cut.

I am going to Maidstone next weekend for my friends twins Christening, she conceived with clomid Justine. I can't wait they will be 3 months old, and it will be the first time of seeing them. My sister also arrives from the States on Friday with my 2 nieces who I have never met. They are 3 and a half and two. So the plan is R&R this weekend and then lots to do in the next fortnight once my sister arrives.

Right, best get ready for work. Justine keep us posted with your progress. Bev, happy reading.

Bye for now, enjoy your weekend.
Love
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Hi Karen/Justine
Justine - good luck for Monday, will be thinking about you. Hope all goes well.
Karen - still reading as I was so tired last night after a 12 hour day at work and then had a sad microwave meal for one last night, but I did have a glass of bubbly - just thought "sod it"!!. (Got 2 lovely cards from Garry.) So, will read the books again tonight. How are you feeling I bet you keep looking around the house thinking is that ok there? What about that? Good luck,may not be here again before Tuesday but if not the best of luck to you and Rich.
Thinking of you love Bev H xxxx


----------



## Bev H

Good Morning
Justine - thinking about you today   reiki^   
Karen - I'm a day ahead of myself - keep thinking it's happening for you tomorrow but NO it's Wednesday isn't it? - silly me, anyway, thinking about you xxxxx|Take care and look forward to hearing from you!!


----------



## KarenM

Hi girls

Justine - hope you have had a good day today. Sending you lots of postive thoughts. 

Bev - only 2 more get ups for me and 10 for you. I bet you can't wait to see Garry again, look at all the reading he will have to do when he his home too. Not long now either until 4th March. I'll sign on on Wednesday afternoon as soon as she has gone and let you know what happens.

Laine - hope you found us on here!

TTFN
Karen x


----------



## Mummytoone

KarenM Good Luck for your first social worker check today!!! 

Thinking of you

Love Lou xxxx


----------



## Mel

Karen,

 Good luck for today, we will all be thinking of you and hope that everything goes well .

Cant wait to hear how it all went 

Sending you lots love 

Mel and Tony

x x x x x x x x


----------



## Bev H

Good Morning Karen
Hope it has been a good morning for you. Hope all went well today - can't wait to hear about it.
Love and hugs Bev H xxx

Justine - How are you?  Hope you are ok.. 
Take care xxxxx


----------



## KarenM

Thanks for all your good wishes.

Well this morning has been a morning full of form filling, so we are now officially on our journey.

Things will be a bit quiet for a while whilst all the security checks are going through. Once these are done we will do our course and then it all starts to roll from there.

The social worker was lovely. She may not be the one we end up with as you are not assgined your proper social worker until you have completed the course.

The only down side for us is that they have to contact Rich's ex-wife. We have not seen anything of her since the divorce and so don't know where she is. I'm sure she won't have objections, she and Rich were only married for 5 months (plus the 2 year separation) it is just the fact that she gets to know some of our private and personal business. Oh well no pain no gain!

Off for some retail therapy this afternoon.

Bye for now
love
Karen x


----------



## Flo

Hi Karen,
I am so glad that your social work visit went well this morning - I bet you are soooooooo relieved that it is over!

I think it is brilliant that you are now officially in the system and am looking forward to the day when you sign on to tell us all about your new family
        

Pity about the ex having to be brought into your private business but hey ho, if it is worth it at the end of the day......................

Have a good shopping trip. Indulge!!!!!!!

flo


----------



## Bev H

Hi Karen
Thanks for letting us know your news and glad it went well. Interesting about the ex-wife as Garry has one too!! I know he won't like her knowing our business either but if we have to then that's that hey? I wonder why they contact the exs 
Anyway, I am really excited for you and hope the time passes quickly. Only 6 more "get-ups" for me and then my man will be home.
Enjoy your busy weekend ahead - I've got one too as it's Dad's 70th, so BIG family party.
Take care Karen and will be in touch. Lots of love and thanks for sharing your journey with us! 
Love Bev H xxxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Bev

The reason for involving the ex's is due to a case were a 3 year old boy was killed by the adoptive father. They never got in touch with either of his two ex-wives.

When they investigated the child's death, the investigator went and spoke to the ex's saying that the man was applying to be an adoptive parent. They both in separate interviews told the investigator that they had both been subject to years of domestic violence and that he had even shown violence towards children, and that they would not recommend him to be an adoptive parent.

Obviously as the checks were never done in the first place, it was too late.

Some of the process I won't be able to share with people as it is highly confidential and needs protecting from potential paedophiles or abusers who might find things on sites like this. I'll tell you all as much as I can, without compromising the system.

Right off for some lunch, then I am going to post the forms she left us to fill in, which we have done already and then off to town for retail therapy!

Bev - great news - only 6 more get ups . Happy Birthday to your Dad too .

TTFN
Karen x


----------



## Mel

Karen,

Im so glad that your appt with the social worker went well this morning, what a relief that your first visit is over and done with. I hope that everything goes well for you - i cannot wait till we hear what little angels have chosen you to be there mummy and daddy, its all very exciting.

Lots love and best wishes

Mel

P.S - Enjoy your retail therapy.


----------



## Sue MJ

Karen,

Just wanted to say well done - glad your visit went well.....exciting stuff!

Hope the retail therapy is going well.

Love,

Sue


----------



## SueL

Karen

Great news on the first visit today!!!!!!!!

You're well on the way.

Congratulations!

Love Sue
xxxxx


----------



## kylepaul

hi karen/bev,
thanx for the positive vibes!!!
had scan on monday still havent ovulated!on day 23 of my cycle!!god only knows what is going on in there  
got scan again tomorrow (their sick of the sight of me by now!)day 26! usually have a 26-34 day cycle.wait & see what tomorrow brings.
karen- glad everything went well for you,wont be long b4 you get to be mum & dad.
best wishes

love justine xxx


----------



## *Kim*

Hi Karen

Just wanted to say i am glad it went ok today. I cant wait to see the piccies of your children. I think you are going to make brilliant parents and the children are going to be so lucky to get you.

Take Care

Love Kim


----------



## kylepaul

hi girls,
today was not a good day.
got up this morning found AF had arrived!!! 
had scan as planned they said follicle was still there had not ruptured 
so now have to wait & see what my consultant says when i see him in 4 weeks time.seeing as he said i was ovulating normally what on earth is going on 
dont know if i should carry on taking the next course of clomid?  dont know what to do??
anyway enough of me going on!
hope everyone is ok
speak to you soon

love justinexxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Justine

Sorry to hear that af has arrived. I wish they could invent something like a belly button jewel that turned red when you expect af and then green if you are ovulating or pg!

What day are you on now then? It seems weird that the follie has not ruptured. Is it a full blown af or just some spotting, as you can get spotting at ovulation sometimes?

Hope the consultant sheds some light on it.

In the meantime, sending you some cyber hugs ^group^ ^group^^group^ ^group^

Love
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Dear Justine
Sorry to read your news - hope the Consultant has some positive answers for you. ^group^ ^group^ ^group^ ^group^

Hi Karen - have a good weekend.

Love Bev H xx


----------



## kylepaul

hi karen/bev,
thanx for the hugs!
karen it was day 26 yesterday when i had the last scan,& it is the proper af!!!
decided not to start my next course of clomid as i still have the unruptured follie there, i didnt want that getting too big & causing pain(if that`s what could happen??) 
anyway i`ll wait & see what my consultant says on 21st march,just 4 weeks away.
keep well both of you  
halfterm next week,got the week of work, so we r going to stay with my brother & his family in norfolk for a few days on tuesday .hope it doesnt rain!!!! 
take care 
love justine xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi everyone 

Justine - I hope you are feeling better. Any news on the unruptured follie? Good luck when you see your consultant on 21st March.

Bev - I've lost count with all these sleeps/get ups. it can't be many, or is he here? will understand if you not on the boards  Not long until the 4th!!

Sorry I've not been around but as you know my sister and her family arrived on Friday and then I had the Christening over the weekend. I have been feeling a little emotional, I think I've overdosed on babies and children. I took my nieces to Chester Zoo yesterday, we had a great time. They love animals and spent most of the day singing and giggling, it was great.

Not much happening on the adoption front. We are waiting for our checks to come back and then we can get on the course. Just taking some ME time before all of it starts. I think some more retail therapy is in order.

We are having our patio decked over the next couple of days and then I have got Friday through to next Thursday off, so I am going to creosote the fence (weather permitting). Great job!! 

Anyway time to get ready for work.
Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## Mummytoone

Karen

Hugs to you.

I know what you mean about the children overdosing, Ive done that.

There is no time to feel down, you need to get that garden sorted!!!! You ARE gonna have little people running round it soon so you best get that fence done.

Wow just think this time next year things will be sooo different. There'll be no logging on here in the mornings!! You'll be too busy.

Take care and (((((((hug))))))))

Love Lou xxx


----------



## Bev H

Hi Karen
He's here!! Arrived safely this morning and we have had a lovely quiet day. Just been looking through some of the adoption info and looking at the different children who are looking for a mummy and daddy!!
Chester Zoo hey? - My mum and dad live up there, Chester is lovely, anyway must dash, cooking dinner before the Arsenal match at 7.30.
Hope you enjoy your ME time, best make the most of it while you can, take csre love Bev xxx

Justine, hope you're ok and have some news. 

Love Bev H xxx


----------



## Vicky W

Hello

Glad to hear garry got home safely Bev, hope you have a lovely time this week.

Justine sorry to hear about your AF and strange cycle. Hope you have a good time up here in Norfolk whereabouts are you staying? (I live just outside Norwich)

It's not raining  we only have sunshine!

Karen, have fun creositing, I gave in last year and got someone else to do it, not may fave job.

I've got a couple of days off tomorrow and Friday and I will be spring cleaning my kitchen. Got a bit worried when dh kept finding things lurking in cupboards with use by dates of 1999!!!

Not really relishing it but it will be great when it's done.

Have a good week eveyone, as Lou says we soon won't know the luxury of having time on our hands, will we!!! 

Bye for now

Love Vicky


----------



## KarenM

Hi Girls

Justine - hope things are ok with you, not long to wait until your appointment.

Lou - thank you for keep popping in. You are very kind and thoughtful. Hope those follies are ok. Good luck I'll wait to see your 

Bev - glad to hear that Garry is back. I hope your are enjoying having him around again  Good luck for Tuesday. Do let us know how it goes.

We have had some news today. Two of our referees have contacted us to say that the references arrived in the post today. one has already filled it in and sent it back!!

I've got a few days off work, don't go back until next Thursday. I think I have timed it right as I have been really crabby and irritable over the last few days with things that just normally don't phase me have been really niggling at me. I have sat and pottered today. Did a bit of gardening this morning and then this afternoon I watched Cold Feet, as I missed it last weekend.

Best go I am in the middle of colouring my hair and I don't want it to look purple!!(should be mahogany!)

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## kylepaul

hi girls,
just got back from a few sunny days in norfolk. 
vicky-stayed at my brothers house in syderstone.
my brother is in the RAF so he took us to his base & my son got to sit in one of his aircraft.all he kept saying was"wow"!!!!!
yesterday we went to banham zoo,that was good,great weather 
karen-got letter from clinic they have cancelled my march app.changed it to 5 may!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will give them a ring & ask for a different one,i cant wait that long. 
glad to hear you had a good time at the zoo aswell!
hope you are ok?
just more waiting for you now.thats all we seem to do all the time!!!wait ,wait,wait.
best wishes to all the girls on here
i am so glad that i found this site, i dont know who i would talk to about all this otherwise

love justine xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Everyone

Justine - really sorry to hear that they have cancelled your appointment. I hope that you are able to get in to see them sooner.

Bev - good luck ^thumbsup^ with your appointment tomorrow. Don't forget to let us know what happens. Is it just an open evening to get more info?

Not much happening here, just making the most of a few days off work. I don't think i am going to end up doing the fence and in all seriousness - I dont care !!! Spending the day with my sister and her kids tomorrow, they go back on Thursday  Oh well I'll just have to convince rich that it is a good idea to go to the States for a holiday. He'll take some convincing though.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Hi Girls
Just got back from Winchester and the "Information Day". It lasted 2 hours and was very informative, quite a few people there and a few questions were asked at the end. Basically you now write back to them and let them know that yes you are interested in the adotpion process and they will then arrange the "home visit". We will definitely do this step as I feel that this will be more beneficial to us as a couple and it's more relaxed etc. So I'm off to type the letter to them now.
Justine - sorry they have delayed your appointment, have you managed to organise an earlier one than May? I do hope so.
Karen, hope you're enjoying your few days off and can use all your persuasive charms on Rich!!!! USA sounds great to me, goo luck 
HI to Vicky and Lou, thanks for looking in on us. 
I'm back to work tomorrow after a week off, so shouldn't grumble but it will be awful leaving Garry in bed and leaving home at 05.30 oh well the mornings are getting lighter aren't they?
Love to you all and thanks for your support and good wishes. Lots of love Bev H xxxx & Garry xxx


----------



## KarenM

Bev

That's great news. Have you decided on how many you are going to adopt? Are you going for one or a sibling group like me? How long did they say the process would take in Hampshire? Will you have to wait before applying following your treatment?

Sorry all these questions. It is just so exciting.

Sorry to hear you have to get up this morning for work. How long is Garry at home for? It's my first day back tomorrow. I have getting up leaisurely about 8-8.30 but tomorrow the alarm will go off at 5.50!

Best go and get some brekkie. Don't know what to do today. The fence won't be getting done as its raining!

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## Bev H

Good Morning Karen
Hope your day at work went ok. Mine did....
So, we would like to adopt 2 children the younger the better but we'll have to see as there aren't too many young ones about plus Garry and I are both 39 so they feel we are too old for 0-2year olds, I really don't know how it works. We have expressed an interest in that age range to begin with but after that we have said really under the age of 7 would be fine! 
When I first enquired about adoption they said that as I'd had IVF they would recommend a 6 month "cooling off" period so that will be April/May time and that is when Garry comes back home for good so the timing about that is perfect! I sent my letter yesterday and have asked for our "home-visit" in May. 
We were told that we wold have to attend a 4 day course, do you have to do this? 
The waiting in Hampshire is approx. 1 year - they already have 40 applicants at the current time and they reckon it will take about 9-12 months to place children with them. Obviously we hope it's quicker!!!
So, now it's the waiting but it is exciting, I keep looking at all the different bedroom furniture, clothes, shoes, etc. Books that I would buy for them I wish it could happen tomorrow.............
Best do some work now!! Hope everybody is well. 
Did you manage to talk Rich around about the holiday?
Garry leaves on Sunday so we are having friends over on Sat. night for supper so I'll be a busy bee cooking etc. Catch up with you all soon. Take care Love Bev H xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Girls

Its getting exciting.

Your new familys are just round the corner! 

Love Lou xxx


----------



## KarenM

Bev

Great news. It is all so exciting. The only thing is it does go a bit quiet after you have had your first visit. We do have to do a course too, but ours is three days.

Sorry to hear that Garry is going back on Sunday, make the most of these last few days. May isn't that far away. Look how quickly it came around since he last went.

I haven't managed to convince Rich on the holiday front. We have already got 4 holidays planned and booked this year (getting them in whilst we can). We're off to Dublin for my dreaded 30th birthday next month, then Portugal in June, Scotland in September (with the dogs, have been the last two years too) and then Scotland again for New Year (different part), although we have tentatively booked for two additional ones!

My sister flew back today. I feel quite sad about it. We never used to get on, but its been really good this time and she has been able to understand certain things from my perspective which she never used to.

Got to go, I wasn't hungry earlier as I went out for lunch, but my tummy was rimbling so i've put a few low fat chips in the oven!!

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


----------



## kylepaul

to bev /karen,
great news!i`m glad it went well for you both.
when we went for our talk on adoption they said our course would be for 2days?
just think time will soon fly by,you and karen will have your new lovely family. 

exciting stuff!!!!!!!

best wishes
love justine xxx


----------



## KarenM

Hi Girls

Well not much happening here. I just want my letter back to say the CRB check is done and that we can go on the course. The frustrating thing for me is that both Rich and I are CRB cleared as I work for the Police. But given what happened with the officer in the Holly and Jessica case, it doesn't hold water anymore, so I am resigned to waiting.

Bev - I hope you made the most of having garry around, may will be here before you know it and then you have him home for good. Have you got the forms filled out now. Do let us know when you hear back about your social worker visit. Mine took a week to sort out so hope they will be as quick for you.

Justine - hope things are ok with you. Are you continuing with the clomid or do you have to wait to see your consultant. Any joy with moving the appointment forward?

Well best go and get ready for another busy day in the office. Only 3 weeks tomorrow until my holiday to Dublin. Looking forward to it for the break but dreading turning 30, oh well not alot I can do about that!

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen

Garry and I had a lovely time, just flew by, still only 10 weeks to go now.........
I wrote back to the Social Services requesting our home visit for mid-May so I guess they well be dealing with people who are ready now, so no news yet and no forms have been completed. We have been asked to provide 3 personal references each, how about you? Garry's friend is a Police Officer so he thought he would ask them thinking it would help but I guess not going by what you said!!!! Still, we are all honest people so it shouldn't matter should it?? 
30 is a great age to become, I loved it and had a big party..... planning our 40ths now, later this year, but really not bothered about becoming 40.......life is for living and having fun .
Justine - how about you? How are you? Any news on an earlier appt for you? I do hope so, good luck.
Take care all, catch up again soon and Karen hope things happen SOON!!! Love from Bev H xxxxx


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## kylepaul

hi karen/bev& everyone else on here!
glad to hear you both are well,waiting patiently.

phoned clinic they said that they are not allowed to bring app forward so they gave me my consultants secretary`s phone no.rang her,she was off sick most of last week!!!!!!!finally got hold of her on friday.she said that as she recognised my name!!!! she had put me down for a cancellation if it comes up,as there are no more app available so it looks like more waiting for me too.
nomore clomid till then.
i dont want to take it if its not working? 
i dont know if thats right or not?
anyway thats enough about me,take care.
karen i hated turning 30!luckily everyone forgot that it was my 30th except my sister who gave me a card with a big 30 on the front!
i`m 32 next month thats even worse!!!!!!!!!!!time is running away with out me.
like you say nothing we can do about it.just enjoy your holiday.

love justine xxx


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Justine - I didn't realise it was your birthday in April too, are you an Aries or a Taurus? If you are an Aries, then that makes us all fire signs. I hope they manage to get you a cancellation appointment. don't give up hope yet, I know many people who have conceived with clomid.

Bev - we had to give 3 references too. Two were character references and the other is for what they call a guardian. Basically, they are the people that decide on what happens to the children if anything happens to us, or they are prepared to take the children in themselves. All have had their letters and sent them back.

Glad to hear that you had a lovely time with Garry, it's nearly only 9 weeks to go, so time is flying already. 

Can you believe that the other Social Services department from the other Council have sent us an invite to their March open evening ! There is a form in the back to confirm interest, and you have to reply either way. So I am going to send it back to them and say that because they cancelled the meeting in Janaury that we have gone ahead with another Council.

Well I have tomorrow off work to use up the last of my leave for this year. I haven't got anything planned, but we are re-turfing the lawn on Saturday!! At least then the garden is done, so that is one less job on the list for this spring.

Speak soon girls
Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Councils! Sometimes they aren't the best organised of people are they? Makes you wonder how they get things organised sometimes??  
Enjoy your day off today. You make me feel guilty as you are always so busy "doing things". Gardening is my least favourite "hobby" but I have to get it done some time soon, probably next weekend as I'm playing netball in the morning then off to The Midlands to catch up with friends this weekend.........
Garry is fine , got back there safely, only about 65 days to go.
Have a great weekend, speak soon. Love Bev H xxx


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## Bex

Hi everyone,
another fellow fire sign here - Sagittarius !
Hope you don't mind me butting in on your postings. .
We have just had failed ICSI and i had failed treatments with ex-husband which resulted in 6wk m/c.
Paul & I have discussed adoption but after reading that they contact ex's, we may have to rethink.
He has the ex from hell and i'm sure she would do everything in her power to spoil things for us . 
I was adopted as a baby myself and have the BEST mum in the world - she is my mum and i never think of her as anyone but my mum.
Thanks for the links, i'll contact our local Social Services and get the ball rolling.
Good luck to you all and i'll keep watching for more news.
love Becky x


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## Bev H

Hi Bex
Welcome over here - I am a Sagittarian too!!!! 
If you need to ask anything or just want to chat there are lots of use here to help you out.
Good luck with any future treatments.
Take care love and best wishes Bev H xxx


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## KarenM

Bex

Welcome to the board. Sorry to hear about your negative treatment, hope the frsoties work for you later this year. We didn't realise about the ex's business until the social worker told us. I don't think my dh's ex will cause any problems, its just the fact that she knows that we are going for adoption that makes me angry, it is our personal business to share with who we like and I don't consider it her right to know. But as they say no pain, no gain. Good luck for your FET.

Bev - I am one of these people who cannot sit still. Rich could sit in front of the TV for hours and he gets really annoyed with me because I start to mess about when I am bored, then he gets all serious, and I get told off !!! Whereabouts in the Midlands are you coming too? I'm near Wolverhampton!

Best go and give the dogs their tea.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## SAPPHIRE

Hi Karen and ladies

Hope you don't mind me joining but I have been reading your posts as we also may go down the adoption road.

Unfortunately I am not able to do IVF/ICSI due to high fsh levels, so the only hope we have is egg donation, which we are looking into at the moment, however if that fails or not suitable, then we will be looking further into adoption.

I know that we cannot do both, as you are not allowed, which seems a shame as the years are ticking by but hey, we will all get there in the end.

Anyway, I have been reading the posts and it is so interesting to know what goes on, just to wish you all the very best of luck for your placing. Do you have an idea of when that might be?

Take care and the very best of luck.

Love Debs x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen & Everybody else here
Just saying hi really - all quiet on the home front.
Hi Debs - welcome over here and good luck for whatever the future brings for you and dh.
Take care all love Bev H xxx


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## KarenM

Hi Bev - It's all quiet here too. Just waiting for the checks to come back so I can dance like a mad banana            having got a course date. Hope you had a good trip to the Midlands this weekend. Are you going to Stratford?

Debs - welcome to the board. Glad to hear that our posts are helping you out. My council have said that it will take 12 months all told. Different councils have different regulations as to how long you have to leave it since having treatment. Luckily for us we didn't get that far so haven't had to delay.

Justine - hope you are doing ok.

Speak soon girls
love
Karen x


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## Bev H

WOW Karen
That is great news that you've got your course date - things are moving quickly now aren't they? How exciting!!!!  
I won't be going to Stratford unfortunately - it is going to be so much fun but I hope to make the next one whenever/wherever that is!!! Are you going?
Take care all, love from Bev H xxx
p.s. Garry home on MAY 11th yipeee


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## KarenM

Bev

No excitement yet, just waiting to be able to dance like a mad one!!! As soon as the course date comes I will let you know.

Not long to go now until 11 th May, it will fly by.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## KarenM

Hi Bev, Justine and anyone else checking in.

GOOD NEWS......

My CRB check has come back clear (I knew it would so I don't know why I am so excited). Just need rich's to come back clear (which it will) and then we will get a course date.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

I've not been on the site much since the war broke out, I seemed to be glued to Sky News. My love and thoughts go out to all of you who may have loved one's involved in the conflict.

Bye for Now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Thanks for sharing your good news, I'm sure, as you say, Rich's will come through soon too. Things will really get moving then won't they  It was great to hear some good news today!!! after all the goings on...
I'm afraid I too have been glued to Sky News, I am so caught up in it all and am just grateful that Garry is not there. I just can't stop thinking about all those people out there 
Take care everybody, speak soon Love Bev H xxx


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## Mummytoone

Prospective Mummys

You are very quiet!!!

I just wondered how everything was going??

Love Lou xxxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Just got back from my long birthday weekend in Dublin to a call from the adoption agency. They want us to start our course this week   . Unfortunately with such short notice we can't get time off work so I am going to ring them tomorrow and see if we can get on the next one. Things are starting to move now!!

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Hope you had a fab birthday........and yikes, things are moving so fast for you, good luck. Hope the course is sooner rather than later.
Love Bev H xxxx


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## SAPPHIRE

Karen

Fantastic news!

How excited are you!!! 

Love Debs x


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Well I have rung them today and the next course are running wither 8/9/10 or 15/16/17 May, so not long to wait now. We should have confirmation by the end of this week if they have places available.

Bev - not long now until Garry comes home. How many sleeps? You wait in three months time you will be where I am now!!

Debs - thanks for your wishes.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Well I have rung the adoption department. The next courses are in May via another local authority, but these are currently fully booked. We have been put down as first reserve.

However, we do have a confirmed place if a reserve place does not come up for 5th, 10, 17th and 24th June  OH MY GOD it is really starting to happen.

I'm feeling a bit impatient because I want to do my course NOW!! Even so,m there is still some things we can start to prepare in advance of going on the course to help speed things along afterwards.

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

Bev - how many sleeps ^sleepy^??

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Only 31 more ^sleepy^ ^sleepy^ then he's home!!
I am getting excited as you can imagine.
Hope you get a call about the May course fingers crossed for you.
Lots of love Bev H xxx


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## KarenM

Bev

How are you doing? By my reckoning there is only 12 more ^sleepy^ ^sleepy^ until Garry comes home.

Not much happening here at the moment. We are just waiting for the course dates to come round. We are first reserve on the course next week and the week after and then if we don't get called for them it will definitely be 5, 10, 17 and 24th June. with time going as quickly as it is (I am sure it has speeded up since turning 30!!) then it will be here before we know it.

Other than that just trying to enjoy life at the moment whilst there is just the two of us.

Anyway hope you are well. Speak soon
Love
Karen 

PS Are you going to Stratford? I've got a pass, and I;m allowed out for the weekend!!!


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## viv

Hi everyone,

I just had to read through your stories on this subject.

It has brought back so many memories. We adopted a little boy in September 2001 at 5 months old. Joshua is now just 2 yrs old. 

We found the journey a relief and very exciting as every day we felt closer to our goal.

Just remember to never give up on that dream as believe me ADOPTION IS BRILLIANT!!

There are lots of special little people out there you just have to be patient and the right one for you will come along in time.

I wish you all lots of love and luck,

Viv x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Long time no speak, glad you're well. Yep, you are right with your calculation so it's now 11 wake-ups to go and I am getting so excited  . So much to look forward to and to discuss!! (They had 2" of snow in The Falklands yesterday!)
Good luck with your course when it comes along, I can't believe where the time is going we are nearly in May!!

Hi Viv, thank you for sharing your thoughts/feelings with us, I read about you on the other thread so GOOD LUCK to you with your treatment.

Justine - how are you? 

Hi to everybody else who looks in here.
Love from Bev H xxxxxx


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## KarenM

Bev

We must be into single figures now for the ^sleepy^!!

Have you had any thoughts about what you are going to do, tx or adoption? Whatever you decide I hope that it works out for you and Garry.

I can't believe it was snowing in the Falklands. Mind you it was like four seasons in one day here yesterday. we had lovely sun, lots of cloud, heavy rain, thunder and then hail!!!

I am just merrily plodding along at the moment jsut waiting. i'm trying to do some of the stuff we need to do post course now, in the hope that things will speed up if i do.

Not much else going on really. Doing my weight watchers and doing really well, I am going to be a slim mum!!

Anyway, just spotted the time, best get ready for work.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## kylepaul

hi girls,
how r u karen& bev?
got good news at clinic,they have changed the critiria for iui treatment 
we have been put on the waiting list.they said it shouldnt be too long a wait.
i came out of there so happy for a change seeing as 6 months ago they said we couldnt have anything!!!! as we already have 1 son.
hows the adoption process coming along?
someone my sister in law knows has just adopted a 10 month old baby, it took them about 2 years in all.

goodluck

love justine xxx


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Justine - good news on the IUI front, how lng do you think you will have to wait?

We have got our course next month. we are going through another local authority to do the course and should then be assigned a social worker. It is quite good timing as the course finishes on the Tuesday as we fly out to Portugal on the Saturday for our holiday.

Bev - by my reckoning there should be no more ^sleepy^ ^sleepy^ ^sleepy^ and Garry should be back home with you. You'vew got alot to think about I know, but remember I am here for you if you want to scream and shout.

Not much else going on here. I just want to be able to go out and buy something. My friend had a baby boy in April and when I went to get the gift, I was looking round and pricing things like car seats and pushchairs, but until we know the full details we just don't know. I just want to buy something, anything!!!

Best get ready for work.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Good Morning
Justine that is such fantastic news for you, hope the wait isn't too long 
Karen- thanks for your message, YES, he's home   - arrived safely on Sunday morning and it's great to have him home    
Like you say we have lots to think and talk about and the sooner the better as far as I am concerned as I desperately want to get things underway one way or another. Thanks for your support and friendship.
Lots of love Bev H xxxxx


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## KarenM

Well we have received our joining instructions for the course. It all seems so real now.

It is only 6 weeks on Saturday to my holiday and by then I will have finished the course. I am so excited.

Rich and I planned our family tree out last night (only back as far as our grandparents).

Hope you are all well.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## SAPPHIRE

Hi everyone

Just a very quick post to see how all you are? 

Not long to go now till your course eh Karen - excited/nervous?

Hope all is well.
Debs x


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## Lillianna

Hi Everyone 

I hope you don't mind me joining this thread also. My name is Lily and we are just starting our adoption journey  

We have written to Local Authorities (Gloucestershire) in our area and are just waiting for the replies  

We feel very excited and positive about the future 

I am looking forward to getting to know you all and share your stories too. 

Any advice about being a newbee adoptor would be welcomed.

love

Lily x x x x x


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## Lillianna

Hi Everyone

WOW what a beautiful few days  

I love the sun. Yesterday my mum and I went to the water park (5 mins from us) and it was lovely with all the littles everywhere  

Todya hubby has gone to Twickenham to watch Glosssterrrrrrrrr play. I used to live in Gloucester.

Have a fun weekend 

love

Lily x x x x


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## KarenM

Only 2 more days to go before I start the course. I am so excited. 

Rich is really nervous just in case he has to talk infront of lots of people and is scared that he may say something inappropriate. There is no grey with Rich he is very black and white and says things as they are.

Hope everyone else is well.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## Hope 2 B

Hi Karen and Rich ,

Just wanted to wish you all the best for the course im sure you'll be fine !

Take care 
Love Gail xxxxxxxxxx


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## Mel

Karen and Rich,

I cannot believe it seems to have come round so quick (for us anyway), all the very best on Thursday and i am sure you will both say the right thing. 

Will be thinking of you 

Mel

x x


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## SAPPHIRE

Hi Karen

All the very best of luck to you and Rich.

Let us know how you get on.

So exciting - your dream will be coming true soon.

Debs x


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## Nicky

"Good luck to you both" 

Lots of love, Nicky xx


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## Laine

Karen & Rich,

Good luck with the course.

Your dreams are starting to come true.
^group^
Lainexx


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## Juel

Karen&Rich

Good luck on your course,i'm sure you'll be fine,everyone else will be as nervous as you i'm sure!!
Thinking of you both
big ^group^
juelxx


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## Bev H

Dear Karen & Rich

Just wishing you good luck tomorrow - you will both be great as it's what you both want and deserve to get.
Will be thinking of you
lots of love Bev H xxxxx


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## SueL

Hi Karen and Rich

All the very best for tomorrow! You'll feel like students again (I guess) but what an amazing result at the end! All the very best! 

Love Sue
xxxxx


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## Hellen

Hi Karen and Rich

Just wanted to wish you good luck for tomorrow. Hope it goes well for you.

Hellen


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## sophie

Hi Karen and Rich

Just wanted to wish you lots of luck for the course. Hope it goes well

Sophie
xx


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## kylepaul

GOODLUCK KAREN & RICH

CANT BELIEVE ITS COME ROUND SOOOOOOOOO QUICKLY
JUST THINK IT WONT BE LONG BEFORE YOU GET YOUR LOVELY FAMILY
ALL THE BEST

LOVE JUSTINE XXX


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## Lillianna

Good Luck Karen & Rich 

Cant wait to hear all about it

love

Lily x


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## Hope 2 B

Hi Karen and Rich 

How did you get on today ?(been thinking of you all day ! )

Hope all went well !

Love Gail xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Thank you for all you good luck messages. I didn't sleep very well last night, nervous about what to expect.

The course was very drawn out, there were some really interesting bits, but some where really unneccesary. Rich was fine and he did alot more talking than I thought he would.

The group of people we are on the course with seem nice and from the sounds of things alot of people stay in touch after the course to see how things develop.

Day 2 is next Tuesday and I am already looking forward to it.

Sorry I can't really share much more with you about what specifically happened but at least this is the start of a very long process.

Thanks again
Love
Karen x


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## SueL

Karen and Rich

Glad all went well today (even if some bits weren't relevant) your one step closer!

Love Sue
xx


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Glad it went well, and Rich behaved himself  
I was thinking about you too, good luck for next Tuesday. ^thumbsup^ ^thumbsup^
Lots of love Bev H xxxx


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## *Kim*

Hi Karen

Just wanted to wish you all the very best for the course. Hope its not too long before you have a child/ren to welcome into your home.

Love Kim


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## *Kim*

i am going to lock this thread and start a new one as it is getting a bit long. here is the link http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/*********/index.php?board=19;action=display;threadid=2886;start=0#lastPost


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