# How do we get through Christmas with a broken heart?



## Nordickat (Feb 6, 2009)

Hello fellow BFN'ers, 

I guess if you have opened this thread then you hurt like I do and I'm sorry for that. Its not fair   

I don't know about anybody else, but I'm finding it hard this year. I can't be bothered, even before my BFN I knew it was going to be hard. I can't be bothered to buy presents for all those happy people out there. I can't face writing my cards at all. What am I supposed to write 'another sh1te year has passed us by with nothing but heartache, roll on 2012 which will no doubt be the same'? I guess I'll have to do the usual 'life is grand' [email protected] that I have been writing for the last 4 years.

I'm just so tired of it and the final straw today was an invite to a street party. 'For the whole family' ....... what f'ing family?! Its a street party for kids, their parents and their grandparents and freaks like me are not welcome I'm sure of it, they never are.

I just want it cancelled this year because I'm so tried of having other peoples happiness forced upon me only to remind me of how lonely and empty my future is. I thought maybe there would be others out there that are going to find it tough too and might need some moral support for all those happy festive gatherings. Of course it might just be me being the only miserable trout this year I guess   

 to everyone hurting, Katxxx


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## Maisyz (Dec 15, 2010)

Firstly, sorry about the BFN  . As for Christmas cards etc, no reason you even have to bother sending them, just let everyone one you are donating to a charity instead. Then I'd strongly recommend Christmas abroad at a couples only resort (nothing worse than other people kids in Santa suits) so somehwee nice and warm or else a cotatge in the middle of nowhere just the two of you. You're not on your own sure plenty of people feel the same. I'm OK with it all but only because I absolutely refuse to put myself through the torture of it anymore. So I don't buy kid or baby stuff for anyone (send them some cah for the trust fund let's face it with Uni fees through the roof it's better long term anyway). Take the pressure off and do Christmas whatever way you fancy, what's the worst that can happen a few people sulk with you because they didn't get a selection boxthis year? If they do who cares, frankly we have enough to go through with treatment etc so don't waste energy worrying about it.

Big hugs Kat, be assured you are not alone x


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## hopefull LM (Jun 6, 2011)

Hey Hun

Know how u feel I'm in 2ww iui 3rd time but I know it hast work and feel so feed up and keep crying thinking when will my time come for a family and it's all around babies and kids every where I think it's that time of year too. But try and stay strong. Some times it's harder said then done I was sad now I'm angry why me 
Why not some mum who doesn't want her kids. But life is unfair

Big hug. 

Love lee xx


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## (hugs) (Oct 18, 2011)

Hey Nordickat,
i feel your pain and I'm in the same boat as you I'm emotionally feeling drained and it hurts so much i feel like everyone is carring on and I'm stuck in this horrible dream world but in fact its very real!

me and my partner started IVF a couple of months ago was going OK yeah had our ups and downs but our odds were high 50% which in my eyes was fab, my eggs and his sperm were all good all fertilized but one so had 7. one 5day blast was put back on the 5th of this month looking after my self had AF cramps in the first week were now in our second week OTD wasn't till next Tuesday the 20th and last night cramps got worse than AF bloody arrived early hours today did a test came back BFN   
this year has been really crap and I'm feeling alone in my devastation my partner doesn't understand truly how hurt i am and i feel abit angry  

looks like theres going to be two miserable trouts this Christmas. I'll   for us our time will come   
stay strong


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## dreamer01 (Apr 14, 2011)

I know exactly how u ladies feel. I am exactly the same. I hate it. We had our ivf in may. It didn't work. Surprise surprise. Dp has two kids so have to wrap their presents and think is this how it will always be? Them and me. Someone else has managed to give him children nd I can't. I feel it so hard this time of year. I remember hogmany last yr saying to each other.... This year it will happen. Sending hugs to u all. It's so unfair at times x


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## Nordickat (Feb 6, 2009)

dreamer. (((hugs))) it must be so hard to deal with step kids xxx
on the off topics board there is an anti christmas thread ad i think you should pop in as there are some other ladies there in your position. they might not help but at least you will know you are not alone in findng it hard. in fact its a super busy thread since so may of us are finding the whole festive thing truly miserable xxx


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## dreamer01 (Apr 14, 2011)

Thank u for that I will check that out now. Big hugs to each and everyone of u xxxxx


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