# HI New Here



## maria684 (May 12, 2006)

Hi another new girl, where do i start here goes i'm 35 and have had the worst year of my life before i start   i'll start from when i got married nearly 10 years ago to the best husband in the world well i think so, we started trying for a baby and i had a misc i wa put on clomid by a doctor in germany (husband in the forces) this didn't work. We moved back to UK Newcastle and stayed on clomid for one last cycle got preg but it was ectopic   they removed my tube at the same time, i was then placed on the IVF waiting list but as we got near the top we moved to Norfolk so had to start again, i was refered to Barts clinic and started IVF in 2001 my result was neg, we then moved to Camberley and i was given clomid again for 1 cycle and again got preg but same as before ectopic and lost my other tube (sorry if i'm waffeling) so we went ahead with IVF at the Nuffield in Woking this was again neg  . Again we moved back to Norfolk and thought we'll give it 1 more try and we went to Bourn Hall what an amazing place and in August 05 we got a ++ result oh my god i couldn't believe it and we were having twins my EDD was 04/05/06 but on 09/01/06 my waters broke and i went into labour at 23weeks 4 days i held for 1 day and had my beautiful little boys James was 1lb 7oz he stayed with us for 3 weeks sorry i've started   and my other little man Joseph was born asleep. So i'm now feeling pretty low, we have made the decision to go back to Bourn Hall for FET soon (we have only 1 frozen as i don't respond well to the drugs). I know some people will think this is early after our loss but it's our way of coping and not for a min are we trying to replace our little angels.  Well that's my nightmare of a journey, thanks all for listening to me.

Maria xx


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## ♥Meerkat♥ (Nov 14, 2005)

Hi Maria
Welcome to FF  
I am sorry to hear that you've had such a traumatic time - sending you a big hug 
Just wanted to wish you lots of strength and good luck with your FET

Best wishes


Meerkat x


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## melanie_1983 (Apr 14, 2006)

Hi Hun. I'm sat getting really emotional about your story.  You have been through so much. Dont worry about rushing back into things. If thats what you want to do, follow your heart. No one will ever think that you are trying to replace your baby angels.  

This site ,although i have only been visiting it for a couple of weeks, has helped me so much. When i feel down i log on, even go into the chat room for support. It is an absolutely wonderful site and i hope it will help you as much as it has helped me!

YOu deserve some happiness hun and i hope everything goes well for your next cycle. 

Take Care. Melanie xx


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## Andee (Feb 23, 2006)

Hi Maria

When I read your story, I just wanted to cry  

I am so sorry for your loss and the difficult time you have had.  I am a firm believer that if its meant to be , then it will happen and I am sure there are good things to come for you.  when you have been thru crap, it makes you really appreciate the good in life.  Nothing is ever easy  

The best of luck with your FET and I sincerely hope this is the right time for you.

Sending you all the positive vibes in the world.  Hope this website helps you in terms of support.  Everyone is so friendly and understanding and it makes things a wee bit more bearable.

Please take care of yourself  xxx    

Andee


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## Kamac80 (Nov 24, 2005)

hi maria and welcome to the site

Sorry to hear that u have been through so much already

Kate xx


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## MrsRedcap (Jan 6, 2006)

Hiya Maria,

I'm so sorry for what you've been through hun. How awful for you and your DH.

You'll find a lot of support here it's a fantastic site a lot of people would not have been able to get by without it.

I wish you the best of luck on your TTC journey and may your longing be fulfilled  

Love

Vicki x


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## Tashi (Apr 4, 2006)

Hi Maria,
I must say that you are a pillar of strenght to me. Boy you are really awesome to have gone through all this.  I personally might have given up after the lost of tubes.  There is something great instore for you & your DH, I could just feel it.  Your bundle of joy will soon be with you guys.

Tashi


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## Guest (May 12, 2006)

hi maria, what can i say, you are obviously a very strong woman. i can only wish you and your dh all the luck that you so deserve. you will find fantastic support here.         x x x


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## maria684 (May 12, 2006)

Hi all

thanks for all your replys i really wasn't expecting so many so soon
looking forward to posting lots

thanks again  

Maria


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## Blu (Jul 28, 2005)

Hi Maria

So sorry for everything you've been through and that the rollercoaster ride is continuing - really hope you find the amazing support on this site will help you through your FET.

Good luck and take care
Blu


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

and Welcome to FF Maria
First things first - 

To lose two babies Like you have done is such a terribly sad thing and only a handful of women know exactly how this makes you feel.
I hope that by finding FF and Posting to us we can help support you with your FET and future pregnancy 
Only you and Your DH know that the time is right for you so  

I see you have replied to a post in the Forget me not area of the site - 
feel free to post a page for James and Joseph 
also we do have a pregnancy Loss board that you may wish to say hello on
as The girls there will understand some your feelings, 
Lastly If you need any help finding your way about the site just Post a question and someone will always try and help.

Wishing you    & 

~Dizzi~


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## kelly2509 (Apr 7, 2005)

hi maria, how sad. so sorry for the loss of your two baby s. I cant begin to imagine how awful it must have been for you. I am a bit lost for words really. I think the other ladies who have posted are right, You have to follow your heart and no-one will ever replace your little angels you just want to give them a big brother or sister who they can look over and guide them through their lives. I wish you all the luck in the world with future pregnancy/s and know that you will find all the love and support from this site. I dont know what I would have done without my ff, when I'm feeling down, they pick me up, when I laugh they laugh with me, they are just so amazing.
Take Care for now, and if you ever want to chat.....
  for james and joseph, im sure they are playing happily with all of the other baby angels.
Take Care 
Kelly
xx


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## Mrs_H (Jan 29, 2006)

Dear maria,

Welcome to FF i see you have been given a warm welcome already this is my life line and have meet some amazing people from FF........ this is our little space where people really understand !

i am lost for words ... but am impowered by your stenght 
sending you a big big hug 







........... sending lost of positive vibes for your FET cycle   

your little angel boys will be looking down on you always
















Hoping to get to know you better, glad you found this site 
Sara xxxxx


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## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

maria

firstly im sorry to hear of the loss of your little ones , masses of  to you

As the others have said we all have different ways of coping and it you feel treatment is right for you to do now then dont let anyone tell you its not!

We have a norfolk girls thread and they are a great bunch, we try and meet about once a month and if you feel like coming to introduce yourself on the thread then please do, I have posted the link to it below for you if you want to come have a look 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,55365.80.html

look forward to chatting to you

love
suzie xx


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## kia 06 (Apr 3, 2006)

Maria.
I am so sorry to here about your terrible loss, your story is so sad, I just wanted to  
Sending you and your DH a big    
I to feel you and your DH are due a great dollop of good luck soon.
You have had some great replies, everyone here on FF is great, 
there is always someone here to pick you up when you are down. 
I wish you all the luck in the world,      

  Kia.  xx


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## Ladyplops (Apr 27, 2006)

Hi Maria,

Welcome to this wonderful site.  I was so moved by your story - what wonderful strong people you and DH are!

A big dollop of luck and hugs my love!  

Lady
x


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## ~SUGAR~ (Mar 25, 2006)

Hi Maria

What a nightmare journey you've had so far hunny. You must be a very strong and amazing woman. Well done for fighting back each time...I hope and pray your time will come very soon and that you and DH will be cradling the baby you so deserve.

I too lost my twins quite late into my pregnancy, so I can understand some of what you've been through, and I perfectly undertsand you wanting to get back on the tx bandwagon again so soon. Only you and DH know when you're ready, and if you're ready now, then we're all here to support you.

Best of luck with everything chick
Don't ever lose that ray of hope.      
Love Sugar xx


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## softy (May 25, 2006)

hi maria, i am new here and haven,t properley registered yet but over the last two weeks i have been following this website. im so very sorry for what you have been through, you truely are an amazing women and have probably had to dig very deep for strength and courage throughout the years. i hope and pray that all your dreams and lovely wishes come true. as i am typing this the tears are falling down my cheeks. all of the stories i have read are heartfelt and extremely honest. yours is the first and only one i have replied to because my sisters name is maria and your two little angels that are having lots of fun in baby heaven have the same name as my loving dad who was my best friend and sadly passed away through bowel cancer over 2 and half  years ago. his name being james joseph. i have just finished 2 weeks of buserelin and had my baseline scan today everything o.k but for some reason feeling very vunerable. my dh is the most wonderful warm and loving man ever and is my everything. i am so glad i found this site and would love to do a daily diary but am so confused by it all. this is our first ivf and are just taking each day as it comes. i do wish you so much happiness and follow your heart. everyone will support you on this site. god bless and i wish everyone lovely wishes take care .        softy  xxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Clare H (Jan 17, 2006)

Hi Maria

Ever so sorry hun, here's hoping that 06 can turn around for you.x x x x


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