# Going for IVF with DE .....HELP!!



## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

HI
I am a newbie so hoping to get some support from all you lovely people 
We are going for IVF with DE and have no idea where to start!
I am getting the distinct impression from reading many posts on here that going abroad is the answer. What does everyone think 
I am reading that the success rate is a lot more and its also a lot cheaper.
My partner is 36 and I am 46 and after a long illness we seem to of missed the time I could get pregnant naturally. I had a miscarriage a few years ago at 8 weeks and I know this was to do with my age. I have pretty much stopped having periods and so I know DE is the way forward.
I would love to hear what you experience is of this. I am very optimistic and excited to get started on the treatment


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## Alwayshopeful76 (Aug 27, 2014)

Hi
Didn't want to read and run. I did 4 normal ivf and turned to donor when I turned 40 as the odds I was told are 65% for donor. It was so much less stress than normal ivf once we'd adjusted to the fact that it wasn't going to biologically ours. There is loads to read about eugenics though that tells you how babies take on your dna in the womb.
We went to a clinic recommended in Greece by our doctor- embryolab in thessaloniki who were lovely. Really caring approach for a clinic and flights were cheap.  Our first cycle didn't work but the second did until recently. The clinic are fab though- you get a Skype consultation and then go for the sperm sample - if you're running short on money, just your partner can go for this- they freeze the sperm and then you go for transfer. They offer a Skype consultation after a failed cycle and are really helpful on what the next steps are.they are pretty good value (about £4,500 all in- donor Medstead etc) and no real waiting list. That said, we're going elsewhere next time as they didn't say embryos would be frozen and I think fresh would have increased our odds.
I think donor in the UK is not anonymous which wasn't an issue for us as we are in the 'tell' camp after a counselling session- we'll worth it for looking at implications. I'm not sure but don't think they have age cut offs for donor like a little of the overseas clinics and longer wait lists- but I know little about this so may be wrong.
We're going to try our last shot at ivi in Spain which also has good reviews from our doctor for the labs but is a little more pricey.
Best of luck with your ivf egg journey- the odds are a lot better xxx


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## Alwayshopeful76 (Aug 27, 2014)

Hi
Didn't want to read and run. I did 4 normal ivf and turned to donor when I turned 40 as the odds I was told are 65% for donor. It was so much less stress than normal ivf once we'd adjusted to the fact that it wasn't going to biologically ours. There is loads to read about eugenics though that tells you how babies take on your dna in the womb.
We went to a clinic recommended in Greece by our doctor- embryolab in thessaloniki who were lovely. Really caring approach for a clinic and flights were cheap.  Our first cycle didn't work but the second did until recently. The clinic are fab though- you get a Skype consultation and then go for the sperm sample - if you're running short on money, just your partner can go for this- they freeze the sperm and then you go for transfer. They offer a Skype consultation after a failed cycle and are really helpful on what the next steps are.they are pretty good value (about £4,500 all in- donor Medstead etc) and no real waiting list. That said, we're going elsewhere next time as they didn't say embryos would be frozen and I think fresh would have increased our odds.
I think donor in the UK is not anonymous which wasn't an issue for us as we are in the 'tell' camp after a counselling session- we'll worth it for looking at implications. I'm not sure but don't think they have age cut offs for donor like a little of the overseas clinics and longer wait lists- but I know little about this so may be wrong.
We're going to try our last shot at ivi in Spain which also has good reviews from our doctor for the labs but is a little more pricey.
Best of luck with your ivf egg journey- the odds are a lot better xxx


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## Turia (Feb 2, 2013)

Hi Dixie
I'm sorry about your previous loss ( yours too Hopeful).

My de baby is sleeping away upstairs. As you can see from my signature, it still took quite a few tries for us but he is totally worth it and the most amazing little thing so I wish you both every success. As Hopeful suggests, there is a lot of new research to read on epigenetics (Not eugenics as posted in her previous message! Auto correct spelling has a lot to answer for ) I always suggest:

http://eggdonorsblog.giftovlife.com/epigenetics
http://www.uv.es/uvweb/college/en/news-release/foundation-ivi-shows-there-is-a-genetic-impact-pregnant-mothers-genome-future-baby-even-egg-donation-cases-1285846070123/Noticia.html?id=1285948246330

Getting started is quite overwhelming and everyone will always recommend the place that worked for them! As hopeful says, you first need to decide on UK or abroad.

In the UK, there is no anonymity in that there is a central register of the donor. This means that at the age of 18, the child can ask for information on their donor and try and make contact. There is no guarantee that the info is kept up to date (people may have moved) but the possibility is there. The donors also tend to be older as they are usually undergoing fertility treatment themselves (perhaps due to male factor).

If abroad, donors can be paid so they also tend to be younger (I.e 20s rather than 30s although cut off tends to be 35). However the donor is anonymous so you receive little information about them. The amount you get will vary from country to country and even clinic to clinic. For example my first de clinic in Spain only informed of the age of the donor once we got pregnant (but also sadly lost), whilst our second clinic also in Spain gave a brief description too.

Once that decision is made, you need to decide where especially if going abroad! I recommend first finding out which countries are easy to get to by direct flight. You don't want too much travel stress. Only then would I start researching clinics. Have a look at the International section on the forum and read about which clinics seem the most popular in that area. Then contact them yourself or through someone like Ruth Pellow at IVF Treatment Abroad who acts as a go-between (she is great!). All clinics however will have a dedicated liaison whose job it is just to work with international patients.

Good luck with your research 
Turia X

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that 
fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

Wow thanks guys, really helpful. 
In my head its going to work first or second time. I haven't quite got my head around it not working. I was told there was a really high chance of it being fine but after reading your posts I am wondering if this is actually the case :-/


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

What sort of meds do you have to take for egg donation ivf?


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## deblovescats (Jun 23, 2012)

Hi Dixie and always
sorry to hear about your losses. Dixie - it is a big decision to move to DE but I concur with Turia, well worth it. Now my two little ones are fast asleep! It still isn't 100 % but you do have a much greater chance - I was advised about 60% so just be sceptical when you look at statistics - it's sometimes how the pregnancy rate is calculated, whether positive hcp result, heart beat seen or live birth. Like Turia says, people would tend to recommend the clinic where they had success. Do your research and go with what suits.
I had always hoped to meet my soulmate but he hasn't yet come along - lol so decided to go it alone as time was ticking! I decided on UK clinics due to chance of a child having information when 18 if that is what they want, and also for me, it was more convenient with travel. I was 45 when started so went straight to DE as advised 5% chance with OE. I had two failed attempts at a UK clinic with double donation (I was disappointed as expected better outcome) - one fresh, one frozen. Feedback from clinic was disappointing, so decided to change. I then went to CARE Sheffield and was highly satisfied. I did DD again, got fresh transfer and 3 blasts frozen. Egg donors at both clinics were egg share, didn't find out ages until after positive pregnancy test. This time, my fresh cycle resulted in DS who is now 2 (he's gorgeous) and did frozen cycle with embryo from same cycle, and gave birth to my beautiful little Ice Princess in October. I also have 2 frosties in storage so may even try again! So frozen embryos can work, don't worry. I think it depends on expertise of clinic in freezing. Success rates have increased in frozen with new techniques. So it can definitely work. Do read up on epigenetics and just my opinion, but I have never regretted it. I was anxious when pregnant first time, but once my little boy was born, I was smitten and have never doubted taking that step. It's amazing the number of people who think he looks like me! This time round, I never gave donation another thought when pregnant with my little girl. She looks like a female version of my son and I am happy that they have a genetic link. In my view, (and the legal view) the birth mother is the mum. We give them life, nurture them, protect and give birth to them. It is us that they call mummy and want a cuddle from! 
Good luck in your decision.
Deb


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## Turia (Feb 2, 2013)

Hi Dixie
I remember well the shock that IVF (own egg) didn't work first time round, we thought it was the answer to everything.  That was repeated the first time we did de and that also failed.  Donor eggs are usually the answer if infertility is purely down to age but sadly clinics are all to quick to say 'age' when they don't know why oe IVF doesn't work.

Certainly we were told our problems were all down to my age but it turns out they probably weren't.  My last cycle worked for a number of reasons but the standouts to me were that I took steroids to suppress my immune system.  I was never tested for having high levels of killer cells but chances are that's what I had, which meant none of the embryos had a chance before.  The other possibility was that there had previously been an issue with my OH's sperm.  He had always passed all the tests in terms of quantity, mobility etc but for this last cycle, he tested his sperm DNA fragmentation and it came back really high.  This means that eggs might have been fertilising but not developing properly beyond the first week.  He made some simple lifestyle changes (less alcohol, vitamins etc) and that may also have helped.

Again we will never know for sure what made the difference this time round but it does suggest that there had previously been an underlying problem of some sort other than age.  Success rates with de are usually in the 50-65% zone which is considerably higher than oe for most people (even if age isn't a factor) but someone always has to fall into the % for whom it doesn't work and that previously was me!

You can either try it and then if it doesn't work, explore all the other tests but I would at least do the level one tests before trying just to rule out anything obvious.  (Read the section Agates Guide under Immune Treatments).

In terms of meds, it will vary person to person but you will likely be put on the mini pill to co-ordinate your menstrual cycle with the donor.  You will also probably have tablets to promote oestrogen production (usually Progynova) and pessaries to produce progesterone.  Obviously you also need to take folic acid.  These are the minimum items for a donor egg cycle but it will vary.  I also took a multi pregnancy vitamin, high dose folic, omega 3 and in terms of meds I also took Clexane injections to promote blood flow and steroids to suppress my immune system.

Turia x


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

Thanks for responding with your views. Its so good to be on here and talking to other people. I feel its quite an isolating situation as I dont want to tell people we are considering this. I dont have a very supportive family and neither does my husband so this site is a godsend.
What tests can you have done through your own doctor to make it cheaper or does it not work like that?
I dont want to go through the process and find at the end of it a reason it didnt work but I guess thats life. I would rather have all the tests possible to rule anything out now.


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## Turia (Feb 2, 2013)

Hi again

In terms of tests, have a read on Agate's Section:

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=283000.0 (especially from section 10 onwards)
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=260560.0
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=242395.0

You can usually get level 1 tests done via your GP but it does depend on the GP! Level 1 covers your thyroid, vitamin D levels, clotting tests and ANA/hormone levels. For the guy then sperm DNA and for both of you karyotyping. Unfortunately I don't have much longer in my lunch hour to provide more background to this but all the information is in the above links. Agate is a member on these boards that has done a HUGE amount of work pulling all this information together so there is also really no point in me even trying to duplicate it 

You can however get carried away with doing too many tests and too many 'add-on' procedures so rather than trying to do 'everything' beforehand it may be better to just think in terms of it taking a couple of shots. My consultant said it was highly unusual for de treatment not to work within 3 tries. So do the basic tests to rule out the obvious and then try. Hopefully it works but if not at least there will then be more that you can try.

Turia x


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

Turia, thank you so much for taking the time to answer me. Its very kind of you


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## Hereshoping99 (Dec 10, 2016)

Hi Dixie,
I'm also just starting the process of DE IVF. I was recommended to use IVI clinic in Spain.

Have you decided on a clinic yet? 

I was told I'd need progynova, cylogest pessaries and a decapeptyl injection. The first two I could get on the NHS but not the injection.

I don't have anything as helpful to say like the others do, I just wanted to say good luck and tell you my experience about the meds in case it's useful in any way!


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

HI Hereshoping99
I haven't decided yet but I like the look of Reprofit in the Czech republic simply because they get back to me really quickly where as the others I have emailed have either ignored me or not really been very helpful.
There are so many that my head is spinning to be honest.
I'm also considering frozen as I I don't like the idea of messing with my hormones with a load of medication but its still early days in my decision making process so I still need to do a lot more reading.
When are you going to Spain?


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## Squiggly (Sep 20, 2013)

If you're still getting your head around the idea of egg donation, I would recommend getting in touch with the Donor Conception Network. We joined up as members for a year and they posted us books, sent us useful information, linked us up with others who had been through it and helped us to consider the anonymity issue and the ethics of telling your child about their origins. 

We're lucky that both sets of parents have been supportive since we started sharing our struggle with them about 4 years ago (when I was having an operation). 

As you already know, DE IVF has a much higher success rate. The difference in seeing a photo of the healthy blastocyst rather than embryos built from my rubbishy eggs was incredible. I wasn't that surprised when it worked as everything felt so positive, though still adjusting to the new mindset after trying for such a long time. Have to keep pinching myself!

We were very happy with our clinic in Spain, Instituto Bernabeu. The process of DE IVF is so much easier than normal IVF and we were so much more relaxed. We did actually have a proper holiday as well! 

Upper age limit for DE IVF in Spain appears to be 50. You might want to find out about other countries and what limits they might have. Some countries won't do any donor IVF (like Austria and Italy). Some countries don't seem to have any limits, so there is even a woman who was 72 in India who had her first child! 

Best of luck on your journey, however it works out.


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

I haven't been on for a while as needed some thinking time but thank you for all your comments.
I feel very focused and very positive now that this is totally what I want.
Just need to put the pieces together as to where and when!


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## artist_mum (Jun 19, 2012)

HI Dixie

One more to throw into the melting pot...

like you I went straight to donor egg after a miscarriage at 43 years old, and I didn't have a problem with that - also just thought how fabulous to be able to create a family with the help of a donor.

Also like you I was v happy with the idea of going abroad and during our journey (see my signature) we did try in the UK but found it not only very expensive but also less 'customer focused'.  Not true for everyone i know, but it was the case for us

I loved going to Eugin in Barcelona.  Went over for tests on a day trip (flew out in the morning and back that evening). They did all the required bloods, ECG, mammogram (to check you are OK at your age to have a baby) in a day visit as well as all the appointments at the clinic itself.  We went over 3 times for transfers and each time loved being in Barcelona which is a city we've come to love.

Our baby is due in 6 weeks time and I'm now 51.  (I took a lot of time between transfers to think about what to do, and to prepare my body with yoga, healthy eating etc).  Eugin goes up to 50 and in my case because we had already started treatment, they went to 51 (well, the transfer was 10 days before my 51st birthday but they would have gone longer).  From initial enquiry to embryo transfer is usually around 2 months, so very quick really.  I found them kind, compassionate, thorough, caring and enjoyed every visit to their clinic.  It's all very professional and just a half hour metro ride from the airport.  And a nice quiet part of Barcelona to enjoy whilst you undergo treatment.

Like you my family hasn't been very supportive and it has been a great joy to find enthusiasm and optimism from everyone else on this precious journey.  I wish you every luck in the world with yours.

xx


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

I havent been on here for a while but thought I would check in as we are booked in for Greece Ovum in September! Finally!

Artist_mum thank you for your lovely answer. I am figuring your baby is now here! I hope he/she is as precious as you imagined! 

I decided to get in touch with Ruth Pellow and I am just going with the flow to be honest taking her advice. I have no idea to be honest ad its a total minefield.

I am doing lots of excersize and have recently changed to vegan so eating super healthy. Trying to get my body in the best state it can be in for pregnancy. 

This is really scary but I am super excited


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## Dixie25 (Nov 18, 2016)

Thank you for all your comments and support. Its so nce to be able to speak to people on here as opposed to keeping "mum" so to speak!


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