# Just had one frozen embryo transferred and not feeling hopeful.



## Reb (Mar 27, 2004)

Hi,  we have finially had our only 2 frozen embryos thawed last week, but only one survived.  They were frozen on day 2, one at 4 cell and the other at 3 cell and good quality.  These were from an ivf cycle in 2005 so i was hoping we had a good change as i was younger then.  We have waited a long time to go for them as i needed major surgery etc and had several attempts at having them put last year cancelled.

Anyway, we finially got the go ahead last week as womb lining, layering, folicle and bloods are all good but sadly only one survived and it was only two cell with fragmentation.  

I just feel there isnt any point in even hoping anymore.  I dont know why there is fragmentation on thawing (I am old hand at ivf but new to FETs as this is our only time).  They thawed them around 10 am and they were transerred at 14:30 and the surviving one hadnt done anything in that time.

Does anyone have words of encouragement?  This is our last chance.

Many thanks girls and good luck all that you do  

Love

Becca
xxx


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## Ellie.st (Mar 11, 2005)

Dear Becca

I haven't had a FET (though we are hoping to have one soon) but as far as I know it is quite normal for an embie to lose some cells when thawing and I think it is not uncommon either for them not to do much for a while after they have thawed.  Please hang on in there - FETs can work.  Sending you lots and lots of     

Ellie


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## babymithel (Oct 13, 2008)

Just wanted to wish you luck. xx


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## Caz.s (Jun 27, 2008)

Hi Reb

I just want to wish you loads of luck and it really does only take one. The thaw rate is one in three surviving thaw so your lo is already a little fifhter so please dont give up. Imagine you little one looking around now for a nice place to snuggle in for the next nine months.

I really hope the next 2 weeks go really quickly and you get a BFP at the end. Good luck

Caz.s xx


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## Mrs Wally (Jul 4, 2008)

Dear Becca,

Just wanted to reply to you as we also had only 1 embie transferred. I can't remember where I read it on here but there was another lady on here with a really poor grade embie who was told that there was very little chance of success but she went ahead anyway and got a bfp!! There are loads of miracle stories on here - you just never know when it's meant to be. I wish you all the best of luck. I am testing tomorrow but today feel like AF on the way. How are you doing, and when do you test?


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## Reb (Mar 27, 2004)

Thank you girls, you have helped me a lot to get me back on track.

Mrs Wally, thank you for your kind words, you are quite right.  Please dont worry about AF feelings, I have read so much on hear about that and loads of girls feel it and get positives.  Are you doing a HPT?  If so, which one and on which day?

I have always gone the clinic for a blood test but I am not bothering this as its 100 miles away and they only offered a blood test on the day AF was due so didnt see the point when I could do a HPT.  I wish you all the luck in the world as you surely deserve it.  I'll be looking out for you for any news.

Love

Becca
xxx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Hello Becca

I'm not sure if this helps but I got my BFP from a SFET  . And there was a mess up with the thawing and they did it whilst I was in the waiting room  . It probably finished its defrost inside me  
Your chances of a BFP are much much higher than if you hadn't had the treatment at all so  xx

And for you too Mrs Wally xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Mrs Wally (Jul 4, 2008)

Dear Becca,

Thank you for your good wishes. Unfortunately I tested negative today, my test day. The clinic have told me to retest on Saturday as I have not had AF yet but I know in my heart it's all over. I wish you better luck.

Sam


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## Reb (Mar 27, 2004)

Awww Sam I am so so sorry. I have been thinking of you. I hope you both find some direction to press on to make it happen for you.  You take care and do anything that helps.

LadyLottie, thank you for letting me know, its so good to hear of SFET working.

Take care.

Becca

xxx


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## Jomag (Oct 20, 2008)

Becca - I was told that Frozen embryos that survive are generally very strong to have survived the thaw in the first place.  Our consultant told us with FETs there is usually an element of fragmentation so I wouldnt dwell too much on that.  What I have learnt so far is that this is all down to pot luck with a little bit of fate maybe thrown in there too from the big man upstairs.  There doesnt appear to be any rhyme or reason why it works for one and not another and cell division, quality etc etc just doesnt seem to matter all that much.

I am down regging at the moment and am going to try to make sure I don't analyse every little thing or become totally obsessed by all this.  Last time I thought of nothing else to be honest and how sad is that!  However, I guess when the time comes and I am on my 2ww I will probably be trawling the net looking for some evidence to prove that this is going to work this time.  

Just wanted to wish you well with your test.  I hope you will be reporting a BFP on here very soon.   
Jo x


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Jomag said:


> What I have learnt so far is that this is all down to pot luck with a little bit of fate maybe thrown in there too from the big man upstairs. There doesnt appear to be any rhyme or reason why it works for one and not another and cell division, quality etc etc just doesnt seem to matter all that much.


Oh I so agree with you Jomag. After 10 years for me, and reading all types of stories on here, I'm afraid I can't see any reason why sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. Due to a numer of different factors related to the treatment, this go really shouldn't have worked for me  . But it did! I always found the feeling that it was out of my hands and down to fate quite comforting, but I can understand why some people equally find that frustrating and like to feel more control .

I wish you all the 'luck' in the world that its your turn 

Mrs Wally - so so sorry hun 

LL xx


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## sue93 (Jun 14, 2006)

hi all - just to add our story - we had 3 frozen embryos, the best 2 didn't survive the thaw so we had the last lonely one replaced. It was 4-cell but hadn't changed between 9am when thawed and 4pm when transferred. 

We got a BFP. hcg levels so far have been promising and the first scan is on monday. We've been here before tho so i'm not counting any chickens just yet, but like you Reb I had absolutely no optimism at all and was astonished when we got a positive.

So it can work (so far anyway  )

I'm so sorry Mrs wally 

Sue x


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## Jomag (Oct 20, 2008)

Sue - it is an inspiration that you have got your BFP after such a ropey start.  From reading some of the stories on here I am starting to think the less promising embies have a better success rate!  Perhaps the clinics need to re-evaluate their grading systems!  I hope this is your time as looks like you have been through the mill.  Good luck with the scan on Monday   

Ladylottie -  amazing that your little embie was probably still partly frozen when it went in!  Hey,  maybe that is the key, I might ask my clinic to try that little trick on 14th May   

Have a nice weekend everyone x


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## Reb (Mar 27, 2004)

You are all so right.  It is it a really nice thought that those that survive are made of stronge stuff, thank you for that.

I have been so stressed, mainly about work (usual crap, feeling isolated....listening to baby talk etc).  We will take what ever result is thrown at us (well we have to) but I know I need to calm down.  When I get stressed my neck tightens and I get a lump in my throat.  I have called in sick from work, which isnt like me but I need some peace in my life atm.  I told the lady I sit next to at work about all (she is 44 and has a 1 yr old) and she said that some women would pay a fortune to be in our situation (ie having the hope of pregnancy), this annoyed me so I said 'yes, and we did!!!!!, 20k plus....'  I thought telling her would make her a little more sympathic about not talking about babies so much (it be for long as I am moving in week).  But she continued as normal about baby seats, how many steps he has taken, which felt so insensitive.

Anyway, been taking it easy and bought myself some treats on online  

Thanks to you wonderful ladies I have some purpose now which is to look after myself incase this embryo does decide to be 'the one'.

Jo, good luck with your tx, you right not to stress (easier said than done!!!).

Sue, congratulations!!!    I cant imagine how thrilled you must be.  Take care.

Love and luck

Becca
xxx


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## Jomag (Oct 20, 2008)

Becca - I know what you mean about insensitive mummies at work.  I am surrounded by them.  A few of the girls know what I am going through at the moment and it hasnt once made them stop and think about talking baby talk endlessly in my ear.  In fact, I have one colleague who sat and sympathised with me when I was waiting for my call from the embryologist to find out if any of my frosties had survived the thaw.  We were talking about how surreal it was and it was fairly obvious that I was completely stressed out, when she suddenly grabbed her side and bent over in pain.  I was really worried and asked what was wrong, and what did she say... "oh there I go, ovulating again, I always get that pain"! Considering my problem is polycystic ovaries which means that I don't ovulate only added to my disgust!  That same girl also said that her brother's little baby boy 'looks really weird, must be because its an IVF baby".  What a pathetic, ignorant and hurtful comment to make to someone who is right slap bang in the middle of IVF.

I think that people who have never had to consider the possibility of life without children, cannot possibly have the first inkling of what it feels like to go through what we are going through.  All the ups and downs, building up our hopes, and getting them dashed is heartbreaking for even the strongest of us.  How can they have a clue what it feels like to have to pump yourself full of drugs for weeks, have to endure endless scans and procedures, poking and proding and all the while knowing that it could all end suddenly if just one of the many steps doesnt work.  Then you finally make it to the 2ww, at which point you are an emotional wreck and all you can think of is if you are going to get that BFP, or how you are going to cope if you dont!  

However, there are thousands of women out there who have been where we are, they have spent weeks, months and years thinking they would never get their baby, and now they are mummies.  So hang on to that, why shouldnt you be one of the many many success stories out there.

Jo x


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