# Pregnancy and Parenting After Infertility - Donor Recipients - Part 23



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Here we go - sparkly new thread!

   

As usual please use the ''Bookmark'' tab at the top of the page if you have not got anything to post yet so we do not get hundreds of ''just bookmarking''


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## carrie lou

Ooh I'm first, how exciting!!!!  


Amanda, I did get my results back, thanks for asking - not the news I was hoping for unfortunately as my AMH is 7.7 and they wanted it to be 15. So my clinic have turned me down as an egg sharer.   But all is not lost because I'm looking into another clinic who would accept me as egg sharer with that result. So watch this space


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## Lindz

Jana- that's all sounding perfect. Fingers crossed for you!

Pippi- wow to DH coming out with that! What are you thinking? We'e just been through a big discussion about trying for number 3 as our sperm storage was up. In the end we came to no conclusion but just paid the £175 to put off talking about it for another year  

Hope everyone else is good 

We're having a go at potty training DD this weekend. I was hoping to leave it til summer but she keeps asking me to go to the toilet and take her nappy off so I feel like a bad Mummy ignoring her. DS on the other hand showing no interest at all so going to try one at a time


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## pippilongstockings

jana - hope basting has gone well    

Lindz - good luck with PT! DS1 was a piece of cake and did it early, DS2 is another matter..... Stubborn little sod    Good idea to do one at a time!

Carrie - fingers crossed for the other clinic. I would have liked to have egg shared but I'm a bit old now (34) and really didn't do well with ivf!

juju - no, it wouldn't be june if we did decide to go for it, probably later in the summer. Probably won't go for it now though, I've only just got my head around stopping at 2! 

Holly -   

Once again I'm procrastinating at work.... Must do some work must do some work must do some work


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## ceci.bee

carrie hun sorry to hear that        hope the new clinic can take you on

HOlly               for a green light

Lindz am sure once DD gets it DS will copy her, and you are right to let her lead it, she sounds ready good luck!

afm am in the uk and have left joshi with DH in Africa for a wedding and quick family trip - lovely to be here but already missing my boy   

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## juju81

Carrie, I'd be happy with 7...mines 3   


Janah, you spermed up now     


Ceci, ooooh that's nice but hard.  I can do 3 nights at a push, 2 nights comfortably away from Noah! My DH hates even being away for a night, we have to race back because he misses him so much


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## JanaH

I'm officially PUPO       It works. I've been having a lot of cramps.


They had to use 2 samples as the first one was good, so together it is a great sample, there was 85mil spermies.


Ceci, we have only left Joseph once for a Xmas party last year. So can understand that you are missing him. 


Lindz I agree with Ceci, your DS will follow soon, apparently boys to take longer to potty train. My cousin son did not show any interest until he was 3. 


Holly good luck for tomorrows scan.


Carrie my AMH dropped from 20 to 9 after my laparoscopy. Hope you get sorted with another clinic.


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## juju81

Lindz, Noah started in January this year. Pretty much sorted wees straight away, poos literally since he turned 3.  Just go with the flow, your'll end up stressing yourself out like I did   


Janah, whoooo hoooo    have a good feeling. I had a really high sample, always a bonus.  When is OTD?


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## carrie lou

Jana, congrats on being PUPO    Lots of good luck  


Pippi, most clinics give 35 as the upper age limit for egg sharing so you might just make it   but I take your point about IVF. It's an awful lot to go through, but I think it will be worth it  


Ceci, I've never spent a night away from Zac in his life so can imagine how hard it is for you being so far away from Joshi  but hope you enjoy your time in the UK anyway  


Lindz, good luck with the potty training  Z is 22 months and nowhere near ready yet. I don't think I will even try till he gives much clearer signals that he's ready, like your DD is. Currently when I suggest doing a wee in the toilet this look of pure panic enters his eyes  so think it's best if I don't push it  


AFM - have an appointment at the Lister in a month's time to discuss egg sharing... I told them my AMH result and they said it would be fine, apparently anything over 5 is OK in their book. Feeling really excited and just hope it all goes OK


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## juju81

I'd be walking round like a zombie if I'd not ever had a night away from Noah    


Good luck for next month.  How long does that take to get going? Do you have to be paired with someone else?


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## carrie lou

Yep, I have to be matched with a recipient. Also have to have more detailed blood tests to check genetic things, and counselling, but going by other people's experiences, the Lister are really good and it doesn't take too long before you can start tx. Hopefully be having tx over the summer


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## JanaH

Juju, don't know when otd is. Have to go back to clinic next Wednesday for scan and bloodtest to check progesterone levels. 


We've booked a nanny for next Saturday to look after Joseph so that we can go for some spa treatment and a nice lunch. OMW I'm so sore, can't remember it being so painful with previous IUI's.


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## juju81

They told me 2wks from day of IUI.  I think I felt cramps after my 1st one.  


We really appreciate our days together when we are Noah free. Bloody love him to bits but having some 'us' time is so lovely. He stays at my sisters quite a bit with his cousins. They love it and he loves it     Of treatment doesn't work I'm planning a trip to New York with my sisters


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## JanaH

I really miss not having family around. We would seriously consider an au pair if we have another one, just to help out for when I go into labour and for the first few months. Don't think my dad and stepmother would come over for a long period after my dads stroke.


I'm normally a early tester    Would like to know on the 30th as its my sisters birthday, would be nice to tell her if I am. She is having a c section in 4 weeks.


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## pippilongstockings

Jana - I ALWAYS tested early so I'd say go for it on the 30th      Fingers crossed!

juju - interesting to hear you say that noah took longer to work out poos than wees, Z is exactly the same - he was 100% with his wees from day 2 of PT. We thought he'd cracked it with poos at the weekend but huge step back since Monday. Argh, he's a little monkey! Maybe when he turns 3?! 2 weeks to go   

Ceci - enjoy the peace and the sleep! We have odd nights here and there without the boys but more than 1 night in a row would be utter luxury. I love them to bits but I really miss a good lie in!

Carrie - I massively over-responded on my only ivf attempt. Really couldn't go through that again and I doubt a clinic would let me try. It's a shame as I would like to give something back but in reality I'm not sure I could cope with donating - that makes me sound so selfish and hypocritical but honestly I would struggle   

xx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Well! All going well so far. Lining looking great - 10.8mm and triple layer. Scheduled for ET next Friday 26th.

It has worked out that Day O will fall on Sunday, which was Beanie's due date. Is it a sign?


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## JanaH

That's great news Holly.


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## juju81

I'd see it as a sign Holly,


After trying to start treatment since last summer, our treatment is now going to fall exactly the same time as it did for Noah.  Were looking at that as a sign


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ooh holly that's good news


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I'm lying in bed. The boys are at nursery


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## Lindz

I'm jealous Mini! 

Sounding great Holly 

Day 2 of potty training. No accidents yet but could be because I'm asking about every 3 minutes! Also no poos yet and not left the house so fully expecting it to all go wrong soon!


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## juju81

Lindz that's what I did, for about a week! Then about a week later upped it to half hour lol! It amazes me how long he can hold himself for now!

I'm off to centre parcs Monday....whoooooop hooooooo


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## Lindz

Yep, totally spoke too soon. DD has now completely gone off the whole idea and has decided weeing on the floor is easier! We'll see how she goes tomorrow. Just been out for drinks with a friends and had too much wine. I'm going to feel it tomorrow cleaning wee and poo and going to our toddler music thing at 9am!


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## amandaloo

Mistletoe - good luck for et it's been a long time coming 

Jana - I'm a naughty early tester too ! Fingers crossed

Carrie- great news about being accepted for egg sharing fingers crossed you will be starting soon 

Lindz- hope the potty training is going better 

Juju- have a good time at centreparcs

Hi to everyone else


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## JanaH

Amanda when is you follow up appointment?


Holly not long until your transfer day   


I'm going for a scan and progesterone test tomorrow. I've been keeping busy to take my mind off things. Enjoyed the sun over the weekend, was so nice spending time outside with DH and DS. Looking forward to our spa treatments om Satuday. We are halfway through the 2ww.


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## amandaloo

Jana- exciting ) have you had any symptoms?. Follow up appt is 30th day of your otd . Never had one before do they discuss next options or do you have to
Go back again to do that??


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## JanaH

Blood test showed I ovulated    It came back as 60.6, follicle collapsed nicely and my lining is 14.


Amanda I didn't see the consultant I just called the nurse and told her I wanted to start IUI and she discussed it with the consultant, and we started when af arrived.


Just bought 30 pregnancy test from amazon    I'm constantly symptom spotting. Was very emotional today which is so not me.


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## amandaloo

30   !! Thought I was bad buying two or three !!


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## Lindz

Good look Jana, all sounds really good. How long til you start making a dent in your 30 tests?! 
X


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## JanaH

I'll start using them as soon as they arrive. It's those cheap strip test that the NHS use, so nothing fancy. I paid £5 for 30    I really hope and pray it works as I would be twelve weeks on my birthday, which would be the most amazing experience. For most of the last 14 years my birthday has been the most horrendous day of my life. If something happens in our family it happened on that day.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

30


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## JanaH

Told you I'm obsessed, haven't told DH that I bought them.    He will go mental, I will hand the unused once out when I don't need anymore. I know off a few friends who is trying or starting soon.


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## pippilongstockings

JanaH said:


> Told you I'm obsessed, haven't told DH that I bought them.  He will go mental, *I will hand the unused once *out when I don't need anymore. I know off a few friends who is trying or starting soon.


Yeah right! You'll use them all - 30 is the perfect number for one cycle


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I am now PUPO with a perfect expanding blast that survived the thaw really well. ET was very smooth this time. I am calling the embryo Little Bubble. OTD 8th May.
I found my lucky penny on the way home so I am very happy and very positive


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## amandaloo

Mistletoe- congrats in being Pupo  good luck x

Jana- positive vibes going your way


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## Lindz

Yay Holly! Well done to you and little bubble for getting this far and good luck xx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

good luck holly


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## ceci.bee

Holly that is very exciting am so pleased for you and I hope all the faffing around with your lining to get it perfect means you had a long wait but a will have a lovely sticky BFP


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## hakunamatata

Yep holly I think you've been patient enough, sticky Bfp coming yoyr way.


Ohhhhh 30 janah that should keep you in mischief LOL

Hope everyone well. Addi is running all over and keeping us on our toes. So grown up now. We are waiting for her passport to book a holiday to the south of France early June. X


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## juju81

Janahhhhhhhhh, any news


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## JanaH

Juju how was CP?


Today is 12dpo and not even a faint line... I'm in two minds, one I still think and feel it work and the other one is if it did I should have had a positive by now. All the symptoms could just be the crinone gel. I feel quite deflated...


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## carrie lou

Jana, don't give up hope ... You just don't know for sure until OTD.     Fingers crossed for you.


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## juju81

Defo don't feel deflated yet hun. I tested neg then the next day positive. Have you done another one today?

Centre parcs was fab. We had amazing weather all week too. Even got a tan   I'm on the countdown, tomorrow I can say I'm starting tx next month


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## *ALF*

Don't post very often but wanted to offer Jana a ray of hope - I tested negative 14dpo with a super sensitive (10iui) test didn't test the next day as expected period, tested 16dpo and got a positive with normal test and there was two in there at that point - 12dpo is still very early!!!

Hello to everyone, don't post much but do keep tracks of what's going on!!


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## amandaloo

Jana - still hoping and praying for you   

Been for review appt . Going to have 3 natural iui's then ivf if that Doesn't wrk . Any tips on where to buy the ovulation tests and when to start testing etc ?


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## carrie lou

Amanda, I think i just got Boots own brand ovulation tests. You can also get cheapie ones on the Internet. I tested from about day 10 onwards, 7am and 7pm which is what my clinic recommended. Good luck


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## juju81

I personally hated the line ones.  I'd spend ages trying to decide if it was a line so bought a job lot (about 20) of clearblue smiley face digi ones off eBay for about £20! I also tested twice a day, morning and tea time


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## amandaloo

Thanks for that just looked on eBay  . What's it like having iui ? Does it hurt ?


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## carrie lou

No not really. Maybe a bit of a twinge as the thing goes throu the cervix but I've been told it's very much like ET, so if you've survived that, you'll be fine


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## amandaloo

Thanks Carrie yes survived et ha ha ! Oh good just asking as wasn't sure/curious x


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## juju81

Yeah I found it ok.  Had a few twinges after too. Pretty straight forward.  I worried more about missing the blasted surge    


Are you starting this month?


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## amandaloo

Juju- no most prob July want to have a relaxing holiday first and going menorca in June . When did you usually surge? Must be stressful worrying about when surge will come If you test and its 7pm when you get surge and clinic not open to ring when do you get inseminated? They told me you ring then you have it next day is that the case if it is 7pm when you get a positive?


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## carrie lou

I got my surge at 7pm on a Monday, phoned the clinic first thing the next morning (tested again and was still positive at that point) and they told me to come in Wed morning for insemination. So basting was more than 36 hours after the surge, and I got a BFP so obviously the timing was good. So don't worry, you still have plenty of time from when you get a positive. 


I surged on day 12/13 and had insemination day 14. I think the key is to try and stay as laid back as you can, and trust that the clinic know what they're doing. Easier said than done eh


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## juju81

My clinic have a 24hr nurse on call.  I did surge at 6pm with Noah's treatment and went in the next day. I thought it was too soon but clearly not    If you test twice a day you shouldn't miss it 


Oooooh we could be cycle buddy's. I start after my June holiday.  Am due in end of June, so insemination will be mid July.


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## amandaloo

Juju - think you will be a tad earlier than me tried to work mine out think will be due af mid July . That's if my cycle is regular . It's hard to say at moment as just had treatment . 

Jana- any news?


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## juju81

Ah bum, oh well, we can help each other through the madness of tx again! We're you off to on holiday?


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## JanaH

Tested again this morning and it's negative. Totally gutted as I really thought it worked.   Think there will be a delay in AF arriving as I used progesterone gel.


We've booked to go to Holland for the weekend. Looking forward to it. 


Amanda IUI is a breeze compared to IVF - the only thing with IVF is you know fertilization happened.


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## ceci.bee

Janah hun


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## carrie lou

Oh no Jana, so sorry honey  enjoy your weekend, hopefully take your mind off things for a while.


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## hakunamatata

so sorry janah, that sounded so like me xxx big hugs.
im hoping to go again june/july too. im feeling lots better tho think nice weather helps. xx


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## juju81

Big    janah   


Lets hope we all get some positive news in the summer


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## amandaloo

Jana- oh no   lots of hugs look after yourself xxx

Juju- yes we can support each other


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Jana   

As my wise mother said - if at first you don't succeed, try, try again!


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## JanaH

I've got an appointment with the consultant tonight. Still no AF... 


We are off to Amsterdam for tonight looking forward to some family time  


Enjoy you bank holiday weekend


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Jana - have a lovely hol!

I had a bit of spotting yesterday and it freaked me out as I never had bleeding in any other cycles until either baby came out or I stopped all meds. It only lasted 2-3 hours though and has mysteriously stopped. The embryo was 12 days old - could it be implantation bleeding? I am trying to see it as a good sign.


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## juju81

Janah let us know what he says. Enjoy Amsterdam. I love that city  

Holly, all good signs I'd say. When r u testing?

I've just finished 2 days election duty! Looking forward to a nice glass of gallo later  

Wknd is meant to be lush. Can't flipping wait, might even get my BBQ out


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## ceci.bee

Holly good timing for implantation bleeding so many                      for a sticky BFP

Janah          good luck for your appointment and have a lovely weekend

Ju enjoy hun you sound happy and well all            for the cycle start

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly -twins   


Janah have a great time


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

MM - I only had 1 embryo - but I have been told that frozen blasts have a 5% ID twinning rate.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I know


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

MM - that is a wicked laugh!


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## juju81

Will u test early?


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## juju81

Does having a blast lesten the time between transfer and testing?


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yes - My clinic is is Day 18 days after ''day 0'' which would have been egg collection day.

I only ever test on the date the clinic give me, which is the 8th May this time.


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## juju81

So ur not an early tester   how has hubby been?  His usual supportive self I hope


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

He'll be speechless when he finds its twins


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

He told me that he wants separation and divorce a week before embryo transfer, but still signed the forms for it and said he won't stand in my way as he knows children are my dream, but apparently they are not his dream and the donor issue is eating him up, and he wants to go travelling.
He did pick me up in the car after ET though so I did not have to get public transport.
All very odd. But would kind of like the freedom and maybe find a nice new man who will treat me like a princess and contribute to the house and family?


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## amandaloo

Holly- omg I'm so sorry to hear that    . How are you feeling about it all though ? Are you shocked or was you expecting it ? Really sorry I hope your ok  . Hope you get your dream


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

It'll be about the 3rd time I have nearly divorced him. I think about it constantly - have done for about 10 years. He treats me very poorly and is very strange in his ideas and manners and the way he conducts himself in many situations. I have been unhappy for years and very alone for years. 
Don't get me wrong. Sometimes he has been nice and there have been happy days. But then I am comparing them to days where I get no respect, no help and no normal family existence. He is very selfish and has not contributed to this family for years, physicaly or financially. There is never any fun or romance or even common courtesy. Yet he still wants me to work, pay all the bills, do all the housework and all the childcare etc.


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## juju81

Holly   I'm so sorry   however from what I've ready about him you so don't deserve that. I'm actually surprised you've stuck with him treating you like that for so long   I think in the long run its probably the best decision he's ever made because you do deserve the princess treatment.  Just make sure he pays his way financially for the children   were here for you hun x


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## amandaloo

Holly- if you've been thinking about it for so long and he wants the same it sounds like its the best move for you both . It's not good being in a loveless relationship I know from experience as I've been married once before and I ended it . It's hard at first but over time it does get easier and then when you both find happiness elsewhere it sort of helps you realise that you made the right decision for both of you. Be strong and we will be here for you whatever you decide xx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly sorry to hear that but you don't deserve such a man   you're better off out if it. What will happen with charley? Does he still want to be part of his life or is that it? He does have very strange ideas   you'll be much happier without him. I know you will.


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## ceci.bee

Holly hun it sounds like a terrible relationship that you have thought about ending it for so long - what has stopped you before? He sounds childish and un-supportive and I am sure you can do better and agree that you deserve the princess treatment - you are amazingly strong. And how horrible of him to choose such stressful and difficult timing. I really feel for you hun               when C is involved it makes decisions so much harder. But if he asked you for a divorce and you felt relief then it is definitely the way forward hun. So sorry you are going through this     
and masses of                for OTD. 

llots of love 
Ceci


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## pippilongstockings

Oh crikey holly, are you ok?    Not what you need at the moment I'm guessing.   

Jana -    sorry to hear about your BFN. Will you try again this month?

x


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Only one more sleep. Although I doubt I will be doing much sleeping!


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## Fizzypop

Omg holly just read your post, I am keeping everything crossed for a massive big bfp tomorrow xxxx


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## carrie lou

Good luck Holly, you so deserve it


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## Lindz

Holly-so sorry to hear about DH    Everything crossed for you for tomorrow x


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## amandaloo

Good luck holly x


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## hakunamatata

Good luck holly and big hugs to you dealing with all this aswell.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)




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## northernmonkey

Yay Holly, congratulations!!!! Am just feeding dd and thought I'd see if there was any news from you. You must be delighted! I'm so pleased  for you. Sorry to hear that your dh has chosen now to announce his feelings but I hope it doesn't take any of the shine off your news. What's your OTD?


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## Fizzypop

Holly, am so chuffed for you  a new beginning for you Charlie and a little bubba xxxxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I knew it     well done. What did dh say?


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## juju81

Congratulations holly, as fizzy says, a new start for the 3 of you


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## Lindz

Great news Holly! So pleased for you and C! Xx


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## carrie lou

Congratulations Holly, wonderful news


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## amandaloo

Congratulations Holly         xx


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## JanaH

Congratulations Holly


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## pippilongstockings

Lovely news Holly    

NM - how are you doing? I need to pick your brains about stuff - do you fancy meeting up sometime? I think you said that Millets Farm wasn't too far for you? I can do Mondays or Fridays if you are free? xx


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## ceci.bee

wonderful news Holly am so chuffed for you            

how did DH take the news?? 

big love
Ceci


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## Tia-maria

Congratulations Holly  When I came onto ff several months ago I was so green about everything.You gave such good advice and help that I feel you put me on the right track.
im really happy for you  Tiax


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## ceci.bee

Hi all thought you might be interested in this blog summarising the report about govt advice re telling and talking in donor conception
http://blog.wellcome.ac.uk/2013/05/02/issues-of-identity-and-disclosure-in-donor-conception/

love and light to all
Ceci









/links


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

thats a good article. I agree, it should be law that you tell. surely its a human right to know where you came from.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

But then since at least one child in a class of 30 was found in one study not to have the DNA of their father it would apply to others.


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## carrie lou

Thanks Ceci, very interesting reading. I totally agree with telling but don't know how you could make it law and enforce a law like that without invading people's privacy?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

no it cant be made law cos then how would they know your've told    I was just being dramatic    But honestly imagine if you found out this info years later. Its not right


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## carrie lou

No I totally agree Mini. My brother has a friend whose parents told him at age 18 that he was conceived with donor eggs and donor sperm (they both carried a dodgy gene that they didn't want to pass on) and he hasn't coped at all well with the knowledge. Don't know why they kept the secret that long and then decided to drop the bombshell on him, but I can imagine it must be very traumatic.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

gosh thats awful


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## JanaH

Sorry I've not been on here much. I had to get my head around the negative cycle.    We've decided to do another IVF cycle rather then spending hundreds on IUI. If my cycles stay at 28 days I will start end of July, but will be doing a short protocol as hate down regulating. Can't deal with the headaches and a toddler. We booked a holiday to South Africa in December with a stopover in Dubai for 4 days super excited. My sister had gave birth to a girl yesterday. 


Holly how are you feeling?


Juju not long until you start tx.   


Carrie how did your appointment go? I can't believe our LO are 2 next weekend?


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## carrie lou

I know Jana, it's crazy isn't it   we are having a party next weekend, hoping to let the little ones play in the garden if this weather can get its act together  Wow, your holiday sounds fantastic - something nice to look forward to   


AFM - had my appointment this morning, everything looks great so I've been accepted as an egg sharer    I have to wait for some blood test results that can take 4-6 weeks (chromosome analysis) so by my calculation, all being well, I'll be having IVF sometime in July  and can be a cycle buddy for some of you lovely ladies!!!! Exciting


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## juju81

Fab news Janah.  I can only imagine what a BfN feels like. I'm dreading it. I'm not feeling very positive   holiday sounds lush. An jealous  

Carrie, fab news too. Yep I'll be cycling in July, be nice to go through it with people again


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## JanaH

I've just signed up to do the Race for Life


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## hakunamatata

Oh wow wow wow holly bfp I'm do pleased for uou, go girl.

Congrats on being accepted carrie.

Could be a few of is cycling in july.

Janah i understand your strugglr. Big hugs I did race for life last year after having Addi in feb, how mad was i. Sun please stay around, love it and fot kiddird birthdays x 

Hugs to all. Sorry gor typos on phonr but wanted yo post


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## amandaloo

Owww lots of ppl cycling in July . I have just booked nurse consultation for iui beginning of July  but will be later in July when I start it

Jana- it's so upsetting isn't it   . I wasn't sure if I could handle it again after last bfn . Big hugs to you  

Carrie- great news  

Ceci- interesting article thanks 

Anyone been watching the apprentice ! Box on wheels I don't know !


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## ceci.bee

Janah hun - big         you have had a lot to cope with - BFN with a prev chem pg and your sister giving birth all around the same time, not surprised you have needed some time out hun          but yay for your holiday and upcoming cycle, sounds like the right call.

Carrie yay you are a sharer - that is fab news and so generous of you. am looking forward to following all your cycles over the summer - we are looking at summer 2014 to start tx again, so will hvae to live vicariously through all of you until then.

hakuna how are you doing hun            are you cycling again?

Lots of love to all
Ceci


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I woke up at midnight last night to blood!

I was so scared. I got up several times and it gradually tailed off from bright red to nil by morning.

So I called the GP who sent me to A+E in case it was ectopic. I have quite severe pain in my lower right side when sneezing already, but I have had that in other pregnancies.

So after 4 hours in A+E I had bloods done, examination and a scan and thankfully pregnancy is in the right place, too early to see much, but the yolk sac is visible, and my HCG is sky high at 4200!!

Got to go back in 2 weeks for another scan to see if a fetal pole and heart beat is there.

There was a small amount of blood around the sac and she said it might still be implantation. I am only 5 weeks 5 days today.

Sorry for me post but I am exhausted by it all. So stressful. My BP was really high in A+E but I was physically shaking from the adrenaline. Checked it at home and normal again. phew.


----------



## juju81

Blimey holly, I know exactly what that's like. It's the worst feeling in the world.  Unfortunately mine didnt end like yours     good levels.  How many did you have out back? How is DH hun


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I only had one embryo frozen on day 6.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Big hugs holly.   

I didn't have blood but I did have the pain in one side when I sneezed. It's the muscles. 

In 3 days time you could get a heartbeat.


----------



## Coolish

*Holly* - thanks for pointing me in the direction of this thread. Sorry you've had some scary bleeding. I've had something very similar. A couple of weeks ago at 5 weeks I had 3 days of bright red blood (sorry TMI) and pains on my right hand side - the scariest thing ever. The emergency doctor checked my HCG levels and they were fine, but couldn't get me a scan for 3 days. I had the scan and saw the foetal pole pulsing away and there was a little sac behind that looked empty. I've had spotting of red and brown blood on and off since then, and sometimes pain on my right. I went back for my follow up scan yesterday and the little bean is growing OK (with a lovely little heartbeat) and the little sac has shrunk but I have a bruise in my uterus on the right hand side - hence the pain and the bleeding. The nurse said it's relatively common and nothing they can do but wait for it to go away. My clinic also reassured me that bleeding is quite common wiht IVF pregnancies, especially if on baby asprin or clexane.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Welcome Coool Jules. Thanks for the encouraging words.

I only had one embryo, but they could see a little line of blood around the sac and she said it might just be that releasing as the embryo is getting bigger and elbowing its way into the lining.


----------



## Coolish

*Holly* - my clinic said pretty much the same - the embryo is pushing its way in and finding some good blood vessels - which is a good thing  Still horrendously scary though when it happens!


----------



## ceci.bee

Holly hun that sounds so scary          but goood news on the scan and keeping everything crossed for a growing healthy LO


----------



## juju81

Ceci, josh has the most beautiful eyes


----------



## ceci.bee

Aw thanks Ju - he really does, so blue which will help make him v popular with the ladies when he is older, but does lead to lots of questions along the lines of 'what beautiful eyes he has, where does he get them from?'    as Dh and I both have brown eyes - but there are worse things to worry about and it is a real mystery as the donor also has brown eyes with brown eyed parents.........

Holly how are things today? thinking of you and hope it all settles down soon 

llots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## pippilongstockings

Holly -    How scary for you. No wonder your BP was so high!


Wow, loads of people cycling this summer. Is there room for another one?....... We've not made a definite decision yet but I'm swinging towards trying with our remaining 2 vials of sperm. I must be mad


----------



## ceci.bee

yay pippi go for it!!


----------



## amandaloo

Pippi- plenty of room


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

C is very blonde and blue eyed and I am always having to say that DH and I were blonde as kids as now we both have brown hair.

DH has blue eyes. It is amazing how many people comment and nose about! I have told some close friends so they do not keep putting foot in it.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

We both have brown hair and brown eyes, ds1 has the same but ds2 (who is not from a donor) has blond hair blue eyes     my sister has blond hair and DH was blond as a baby. So all that worrying about matching a donor to suit DH was all a waste of time    


Go for it pippi


----------



## juju81

Do it pippi, oh my, who'd have thought 4 yrs on we would be buddies again   


Ceci, my niece has beautiful eyes that are actually never the same colour every day    they are definately ladie killer eyes  funny isn't it because I'd never think to ask the parent "oooooh who does he get them from"   


My mate Marv & Rochelle have had a baby girl Alaia-Mai


----------



## ceci.bee

That's lovely news Ju. It is amazing how nosey people are about things like that, and I recently told some friends about the donor who had previously been in that brigade and they were really embarassed, shame I felt a bit bad, but you can't go around tellling everyone, especially when you live somewhere like here in Africa where it is really unheard of........it will be easier when we are back home nxt year methinks.


----------



## carrie lou

Zac has strawberry blonde, slightly auburn hair and people are always asking where does the ginger streak come from, because I am fair haired and DH's is very dark brown. I have to tell them I also had a ginger hue at his age, and only turned blond later. Z also has hazel-brown eyes, whereas mine are blue and DH's are green. Our donor was a very good physical match to DH but it just goes to show the whole genes thing is a total lottery  I bet if our children weren't donor conceived, and people asked this sort of question, we wouldn't give it a second thought. 

Pippi, very exciting news Hun  I think you should go for it


----------



## juju81

Ceci     my 'mates' are marvin from JLS & Rochelle from Saturdays    


Carrie, we do often say about Caitlin's eyes "ooooh I wonder who she gets them from"    


I do look at Noah's fingers and toes and wonder if they resemble the donor sometimes


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I do that too ju. If he gives me a look I give a2nd glance and wonder if its a donor look  

Ha marv made out it was a boy.   I'm going yo google them now


----------



## JanaH

My baby boy turned 2 today. 


Carrie if I don't get on here tomorrow, hope Z has a lovely birthday tomorrow.


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Jana  and a very happy birthday to J too    Our babies are two!!!!


Off to finish blowing up balloons... Have a lovely weekend everyone


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

JanaH said:


> My baby boy turned 2 today.
> 
> Carrie if I don't get on here tomorrow, hope Z has a lovely birthday tomorrow.


Good luck


----------



## juju81

♥ Mighty Mini ♥ said:


> JanaH said:
> 
> 
> 
> My baby boy turned 2 today.
> 
> Carrie if I don't get on here tomorrow, hope Z has a lovely birthday tomorrow.
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck
Click to expand...




♥ Mighty Mini ♥ said:


> JanaH said:
> 
> 
> 
> My baby boy turned 2 today.
> 
> Carrie if I don't get on here tomorrow, hope Z has a lovely birthday tomorrow.
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck
Click to expand...

Ha, it's when they turn 3 you wanna worry!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Tell me about it


----------



## amandaloo

Happy bday to the bday boys    hope you all had wonderful days xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Happy birthday 2 more lovely 2 yr olds.

Ju my mate with a 3 year old who is really stroppy calls him her 'threenager'!


----------



## pippilongstockings

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 2 is a tricky age (although 5 isn't a walk in the park   ). Z has been delightful since turning 3 but I think he did his fair share of being horrid before he was 18 months    They all have their "tricky" phases - even my angelic niece is finally going through a difficult phase at last! We had her for 3 days this weekend and she was harder work than both my boys put together! I think my DH is starting to wonder whether having another is a good idea   

Hope you all had a lovely BH weekend? DH worked yesterday but the rest of the weekend was pretty good. The sunshine definitely helped!

P x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Had my viability scan today - one perfect heartbeat and embryo measuring correctly for dates


----------



## amandaloo

Yay great news holly  . What is happening with your husband are you splitting up or has the pregnancy changed things ? Sorry hope you don't think I'm nosey


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Great news. That's gone quick holly.


----------



## hakunamatata

Yippee holly
Happy belated birthday boys x


----------



## Lindz

Wonderful news Holly xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Wonderful wonderful news Holly am so so chuffed for you. How are things with DH??

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## pippilongstockings

Brilliant news holly, really pleased for you


----------



## juju81

Girlies,


Cyclogest v crinone........help me.......are they the same? What is messier (I refuse to insert cyclogest up my bottom) only ever used cyclogest


----------



## JanaH

Juju, I used crinone in my last cycle. So much beter then cyclogest, crinone you only use once a day in the evening and it comes in an applicator. 


I'm seeing the clinic today to discuss my IVF cycle, will have to move it on for about 2 months, as to many people took annual leave over the period as was about to start, will only start September. I need to loose weight as well, I'm really struggling with that.


----------



## juju81

Oh did you. I'm worried about changing things iykwim?

Oh that's a shame about starting, totally know how annoying it is for it to be delayed  . I started slimming world 3wks ago and have lost 9.5lb totes recommend it  

I start tx in about a month


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah hun so sorry you are struggling with the weight            I haev lost some by only eating of Joshi's toddler plate rather than a normal one and only allowing myself seconds if I am really actually hungry afterwards - it is a bit of a mindshift but has really helped - the fact I can't buy chocolate or snacks in malawi also helps! I don't exercise regularly but do cycle to work 3 days per week (gentle 15 minutes up a slope) andit has slowly come off. Slow and gentle is the way foward, esp after everything you ahve been through hun - and the delay although v annoying gives you a bit more time to help get some of it off. I found before tx that every time I wanted something unhealthy  - mostly wine or coffee    I said to myself 'do I want this more than I want a baby?' and the answer was always no, so that helped focus my mind a bit. Good luck hun it is really tough.

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Janah have you tried a diet club? I do slimming works like ju. I like going cos it's nice to chat to it gets going through the sane. Plus it's an evening out the house 

I've lost 3 stone since joining. (Ok that's from after ds1) but for me it's the most I've ever lost. I've never been so slim in my life.


----------



## juju81

I came on today. I can officially say now I'm starting treatment on my next period eeeeeek


----------



## ceci.bee

YAY ju that is fab it has been soooooo long am so excited for you and have everything            for you

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - woohooo . Ps I used progesterone three every night !!! Bit messy . They made me feel sick too which confused me .. Don't let that put you off though .. 

Jana- sorry to hear your tx has been put back   . Xx  I'm sure you will get focused with weight loss . 

Ceci- hi )

Afm/ off to menorca tomorrow x


----------



## juju81

I'm thinking of sticking with what I know.  Both are messy   


Oooooh jel Amanda.  I go a week Monday to gran canaria


----------



## amandaloo

Not long to wait juju   . We are both having a holiday before tx . I'm going to really enjoy it and forget about everything . That's the plan anyway !


----------



## carrie lou

Ooh I'm so jealous of you ladies and your hols... Wish we were going somewhere hot but the best we can afford is a long weekend in Cornwall  


My blood tests all come back good so now I'm waiting to be matched with a recipient. Also we have to get our sperm moved to the new clinic. It's all coming together!!!


Poor Zac is sick at the moment. Vomiting for 48 hours now. We had to take him to the out of hours doctor today to check for dehydration but she just said to keep up with his oral fluids and he will be fine. I just hate to see him like this, he's not his usual self at all


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- get well soon Zac   . Sounds like you are getting there really hope it all works out for you and the family you are helping its such a wonderful thing your doing x


----------



## juju81

Aww carrie, it's awful.. It gets a bit easier when they are older as they can be sick in a bowl.  Still not nice tho     I think it's lovely too.   


Amanda, me too. I could have cycled last month but delayed it so I can enjoy my hols, all inclusive and all that    wanted to shift some weight too.  And if my tx works, Noah will now be over 4 and for me, that's a much easier age gap to be dealing with


----------



## ceci.bee

Oh Carrie so sorry to hear that - it sounds really rotten. He will bounce back while you are still mopping up/doing the washing I promise, hope it is soon.

Amanda hey   

Janah hope you are ok honey

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## pippilongstockings

Woohoo juju, that's great news! 

Carrie - hope Zac is feeling better. Nothing worse than vomiting bugs    Hope he bounces back quickly.

I've lost track of who's cycling and when - could we have a list like we used to have?


----------



## carrie lou

I'm all for having a list - would be good to see who's doing what and when  I've just heard from the new clinic, they won't match me until our sperm has arrived safely so it looks like being July/August for me.   


Zac is much better now and I have just about caught up with the sicky laundry  Did spend the whole of yesterday lying in bed and puking myself, so that didn't help


----------



## juju81

Defo for a list...like the 'old days'   

I'm cycling July


----------



## juju81

Carrie it won't be long, exciting stuff. Glad Z is better, feel sorry for you puking, its not nice trying to look after a baby too


----------



## carrie lou

I know it's rubbish Ju  Mind you DH was very good and looked after him most of the day so I could vomit in peace  He just left all the dirty washing, cleaning, tidying etc for me to tackle today! Oh well, can't expect miracles I suppose!


----------



## pippilongstockings

carrie lou said:


> I know it's rubbish Ju  Mind you DH was very good and looked after him most of the day so I could vomit in peace  *He just left all the dirty washing, cleaning, tidying etc for me to tackle today!* Oh well, can't expect miracles I suppose!


OMG I'd be FURIOUS! Glad you are feeling better, vom bugs are horrid


----------



## ceci.bee

With you there Pipi! 

Carrie pleased you are better now, they are foul bugs aren't they    but at least short lived.


----------



## pippilongstockings

Is anyone here having tx at Complete in Southampton? If so, what are they like? Do you need a referral? How much is one cycle (bringing own sperm and not taking any drugs).

Thank you!

PS. Asking for a friend obviously, not me, oh no, I'm just curious


----------



## juju81

Pippi, NM and cupcake used complete and I looked into it.  It's about £800 per cycle and about £200 I think to move sperm.  It's meant to b a really nice clinic.  Is it really for a friend??

Lost another 3lb at slimming world today, I'm now at my little target in my head that I wanted to get to before having treatment   loads more to go until at a healthy weight tho


----------



## pippilongstockings

juju81 said:


> Pippi, NM and cupcake used complete and I looked into it. It's about £800 per cycle and about £200 I think to move sperm. It's meant to b a really nice clinic. *Is it really for a friend??*
> Lost another 3lb at slimming world today, I'm now at my little target in my head that I wanted to get to before having treatment  loads more to go until at a healthy weight tho


Of course  I'll seek out NM and cupcake and get their opinions - thanks juju.

Well done for your weight loss! x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

pippilongstockings said:


> PS. Asking for a friend obviously, not me, oh no, I'm just curious


Yeah yeah


----------



## pippilongstockings




----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## ceci.bee

Mini just noticed your profile pic, lovely pic of the boys


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Thanks Ceci - I dont let them out the house dressed like that!!    That was an old pic. they look more grown up now.


----------



## juju81

She's lying, they were dressed exactly like that when I went to stay


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## pippilongstockings

It's very quiet here at the moment..... The calm before the storm?! Everyone's making the most of peaceful holidays before they try for/have #2


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I'm just enjoying sitting back and waiting for all your news!


----------



## pippilongstockings

Me too!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Have u decided what to do pip?


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies 

Been on holiday had a lovely time  

Got nurse consultation on 1st July . I'm having natural DIUI think it will be towards end of July when I have it done looking at dates. Going to do an iui July aug sept hoping one will work :-/ I'm very sceptical about it all if I'm honest :-/ keep thinking its not going to work for me again. Then I feel like I'm getting to old for it all :-/ I'm 39 this year in October . Not getting any younger . Been worried about it all .  Really want another am I getting too old


----------



## juju81

Just left our hotel! Damn it. So much to look forward to I suppose! 

Amanda, were doing the same, July, August, September. Then draw a line under it and move on with our lives.  Will be bloody hard but we have to have an end in sight.    for both of us


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - you enjoyed yourselves? Soon as I left wanted to book another holiday ! In fact been looking this weekend at options but going to wait until last min too book in case tx works ! Yes    let's hope eh . We were going to do another ivf after the iui's said one more year of trying then end it . 

Best of luck to everyone trying again this year / month ! 

Who's doing the list?


----------



## juju81

It was lovely. Piled on far too much weight. Our plane has just landed at gran canaria so we will be boarding home soon.

We'll book as soon as tx works or fails! We want to come next June again, if tx works bubba will be due April so will only be 8wks or so but there were other people here with tiddlers.  The hotel is really family friendly too and u can borrow sterilisers etc. probably easiest time to bring one ha ha!

xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Why are you too old at 39 Amanda?

I was 39 when I had treatment for Charley, and I will be 42.5 when (hopefully   ) this one is born.

My friend was 43 and would love another she is 45.


----------



## pippilongstockings

Definitely not too old Amanda!   


Juju - we took Z on holiday when he was 6 weeks, it's the easiest age to take them away! Def make the most of your last summer not restricted by school holiday dates   


Holly - how are you gettin on?   


Mini - still no decision.... I'm swinging towards a yes but I'm still procrastinating about finding a clinic etc


----------



## carrie lou

Hi ladies   


Amanda, def not too old honey - as Holly says there are plenty of ladies on here who have babies in their forties. A friend of mine just had her 4th baby a few months before turning 43. So don't let age put you off!  


Juju, glad you had a lovely holiday  


Pipping, how exciting thinking about number 3   


Holly, how are you feeling?  


AFM - very excited, I got a call from the clinic last week to say I've been matched to a recipient and we are starting DR this week!!!  i can't believe it! Because I can't take the pill (migraines) which is the usual way they synchronise the donor and recipient's cycles, instead we have to start on my day 21 and that happens to be Wednesday! They certainly don't waste any time   I'm going in tomorrow to collect the nasal spray. Really excited but also a bit scared


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Blimey carrie    


Amanda I fell pg at 39 naturally. 39 is the new 21


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - I have posted on the other thread.

Me - I have had a totally manic 5 days with Dad staying - collecting him is a 120 mile round trip and I cut his lawn when I got there (very hard to deal with his dementia - very confused over little things). My hand mixer, boiler and tumble drier all broke down in space of 3 days. All the cleaning, washing, shopping, present wrapping, cooking and cake making and decorating to get ready for Charley's birthday party. The party was really fun and I was proud of all I achieved. Charley loved it - he was totally hyper after his party. Kept saying ''my parteeeee'' He had a Fireman Sam Cake that I was up til 4am making - Like this one (this is not mine, but gives you the idea of what it was like)......


__
https://flic.kr/p/2241307141

I started actually vomiting 4 days ago with the morning sickness - cough and tickle my throat and then I have to be sick. Whether it was tiredness making the sickness worse?
And I have a urine infection picked up at my MW appointment last week, so started antibiotics tonight. Bit scared as I have heard it can increase miscarriage risks. I have my 12 week scan next Tuesday!

Oh and In the night garden live was brilliant at the O2. Dad just about managed the walk in stages with lots of sit downs and we took our time. C loved it. Had a few tantrums as he wanted to get onto the stage and was commando crawling to get there. Everytime I stopped him he went rigid and cried. Bribed him with milky buttons in the end. Bad mummy!

/links


----------



## pippilongstockings

OMG Holly slow down!! You must be exhausted! I found that my morning sickness was much worse when I was tired, hungry or dehydrated. Do you get any time to relax? Must be very hard with your dad - we are going through the same with my grandma at the moment and it's so difficult.    Glad C had a great birthday!

Carrie - how exciting!!


----------



## amandaloo

Hi

Thanks ladies for all your replies think I was having a little wobble , although I do think about it every now and again ! Thanks for the reassurances hope I didn't offend anyone with my worries :-/

Carrie - exciting stuff , best of luck for your dreg )) you will be fine 

Holly- blooming heck you have been busy hope your taking some time out for yourself now 

Mini- thanks for your reply your right though ppl do have babies older now 

Pippi - good luck with the decision making ;-)

Juju- I put on 4 lb ish on mine still haven't faced doing the dreaded diet yet though ! Want to start soon before the iui going to have to put my mind to it !


----------



## juju81

Amanda, I officially put 4.5lb on. Not bad going I don't think ha ha.  Don't worry too much about your age chick.  I don't think any of us planned to be as old as we were/are to be having kids.  I know I'm still 'young' but I never planned to have children in my late 20's.  looking back, I'm pleased we are the age we are at now   


I'm off on a camper (VW campers) jam festival next Friday. Please please pray my period arrives after 4pm Saturday


----------



## pippilongstockings

Have a great weekend juju - I'm very jealous!

My mums having a hip replacement today, I'm a mess! I know she'll be fine but I'm scared for her   Nobody to tell in real life as I'm the 'strong' one so have to pretend I'm not worried! Argh.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

She will be fine! We almost never see hip replacement patients in ICU. Usually only if really frail elderly with falls or redo ops with infections. Considering the number done that is a very very low complication rate. It will transform her life!


----------



## juju81

Pippi she will be fine.  I'm assuming she has probably had it now.  My mum had one 10yrs ago at 45    once the initial 6wks were over it gave her a new lease of life.  Was amazing


----------



## pippilongstockings

Thanks holly and juju - what a horrible day, I was so worried. She's fine! Came round at 3.30 and was on the phone to me by 7 sounding brighter than she has for months! She's been in so much pain I really hope this sorts her out. Thank you for the reassurance xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lovely news pip


----------



## pippilongstockings

She's a tough bird, she's up and walking with sticks today and should be released tomorrow   It was supposed to be 5-7 days (she's had a total hip replacement) but it looks like it'll be less than 48 hours. Phew phew and phew!


----------



## amandaloo

Pip- that's fantastic news  bet you are very relieved. X


----------



## juju81

It's amazing how quick they get moving.  My mum was practically power walking up the corridor the day after surgery and then a day later had her up and down the stairs!


----------



## carrie lou

Pippi, so pleased to hear that. She sounds like my mum, always one step ahead of the medics 

I'm on day 4 of DR. No side effects yet thankfully. I'm still trying to convince myself it's actually happening at last, it was all so sudden  but at least there was no time to get too anxious  I told my boss this week as well, she couldn't have even nicer


----------



## pippilongstockings

Thanks everyone    


Carrie - v exciting! Glad you aren't getting any side effects, fingers crossed that continues   


Holly - OMG I can't believe you are 12 weeks already, that has gone so fast!!


Amanda -    Thank you x


Juju - how was camper jam?


----------



## juju81

Pippi, camper jam is next weekend, today is robbie Williams


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - good news about the no side effects and happy to hear you have started your next journey very best of luck .


----------



## pippilongstockings

juju - I can't keep up with you


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - how is it going?

I had my 12 week scan today and one perfect wriggly baby measuring correctly for dates and Down's markers OK on scan. Just have to wait for bloods now and risk rating.


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- great news you must be so happy  x

Juju - I'm jealous of your social life !

Carrie- you ok still ?

Hello everyone 

Afm - went for nurse consult for natural donor iui on Monday . Sounds pretty straight forward will just be waiting for next af now to come . The nurse told me their results recently have been above national average for diui she told me its been 25 per cent . Fingers crossed eh x


----------



## juju81

Good news holly   


Amanda, when will you be going?  Good results from your clinic   


I go to my clinic Thursday for a scan to check for cysts before I start treatment and to pick up my drugs.  I emailed them to say I was worried about my AF coming when I was in camper jam so they are seeing me before AF comes which has felt like a huge weight has been lifted.  Nick can't take time off work and seems pointless for a 5min scan so I've booked train tickets for myself as didnt fancy driving that far on my own.  Instead I will sit nicely on a train for an hour or so and read my book


----------



## carrie lou

Holly, wonderful news on your scan - so pleased for you    


Amanda, Juju - good luck for your cycles   looks like lots of us can be cycle buddies.


I've been DRing for a week now and still feel fine, only side effects have been very minor nose bleeds from the spray. I feel so normal it's hard to believe the drugs are actually doing anything! I just hope everything is as it should be. Clinic say I should get AF tomorrow (though I think more likely Thurs) and when that happens I'm to phone and book in for my first scan. 


We had a terrible day - DH got a letter from work this morning telling him his job is at risk, it looks likely he'll either be made redundant or redeployed to a lower paid job. Can't believe they have done this to him knowing he is off sick with depression at the moment. Really not what we need right now


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I did not think they could do that Carrie!
My friend's husband had similar and he needed back surgery. They had to put the whole ''consultation'' on hold until he was back to work for everyone affected.


----------



## carrie lou

DH has spoken to his union, they are not happy that things have not been done according to the rules. They say they should be able to get a much extended consultation period. I still think it's disgusting though


----------



## juju81

I agree with holly. My friend works for an airline and is off on mat leave at the mo and has been told she's safe from redundancy and consolation until she's back.  It's all been sorted anyway so her job is actually safe but she was protected.  How is DH? Is it ok at home or is it having a knock on affect with you? I know somedays before Nicks op and he was down I was grateful to get to work some days.  Sounds awful but he just brought my mood down    xxx


----------



## carrie lou

He has good days and bad days Ju. Good days are wonderful because he's putting up shelves, mowing the lawn, taking Zac to the park... Bad days I have to work hard to get him out of bed. And he has quite a temper when he's  really down, not nice.   We are slowly seeing more good days than bad though. 


Really interesting to hear your friends' experiences Holly and Ju. Will pass it on to DH to take it up with the union.


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## juju81

It's so hard to understand depression when you've never been through it isn't it.  My mum was off work last year for 4 months with it,  I found it really hard to understand.  A really good friend in my office was off from July last year until February.  He still has some really odd days and he was sobbing the other day at work.  It's a horrid illness.  Feel for everyone involved


----------



## JanaH

Holly - great news about your scan   


Carrie - how's the d/r going I use to hate the nasal spray and went for the injections instead. Hope your DH gets it stuff sorted at work so that he can concentrate on getting himself better. Depression is horrible I had it when my mum passed away and after I had J. I found it really hard looking after J and know I feel I've missed out but I'm in a much better place then before.


Juju not long until you start      Enjoy the train ride tomorrow   


I've decided to take the plunge and do IVF in my next cycle which should be around the 23rd. I don't care how many people are off in our office, I've had my whole life on hold and not doing that anymore. I've started a diet on Monday and so far I've lost 5.5lbs hoping to shift at least 2st before treatment.  


Hope everyone else is doing well


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - my husband suffers from bouts of depression he was off for 5 months last time and time before about 4 months . It's hard on you both it really is . This sounds selfish but it can be really frustrating too you may understand what I mean . We are both mental health professionals too my husband is a ward manager on a psychiatric ward and I'm a community psychiatric nurse . I always feel totally useless when he gets depression so much different being a carer in the family compared to doing it at wrk . Glad to hear he's coming round a bit now that's positive news . And I agree with the others that they can't do that. If you need any advice re depression etc let me know . 

Juju - think my af is due about 12th July  

Jana- great news 

It's Noah's bday today just in car off to the zoo x


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Happy birthday Noah.  


It's Lucas' birthday tomorrow.   3 years! Where has the time gone.  

My FIL suffers with depression. His mum gets so fed up and down about it. He's had it for years. Such a hard illness on everyone. My SIL has it too and I think dh's brother suffers too. Will have to keep an eye on DS2, just hope it's not genetic


----------



## JanaH

Mini congratulations on your son's 3rd birthday.


----------



## carrie lou

Happy birthday Lucas   and Noah


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## ceci.bee

Happy birthday Noah and Lucas - time flies sooo fast I remember when you got your BFP Min    have a lovely day

Carrie        my dad has suffered from depression on and off his whole life and my sister too - it is such a destructive illness - my dad currently is resistant to all drugs and had to take early retirement. I really really feel for you hun and hope you can both get through this bout      

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - has your af come yet? I felt period pains yesterday and few today might come bit earlier ?


----------



## JanaH

Juju any news


Amanda how exciting hope AF arrives on time for you to start   


I told my boss that I will be doing IVF next months and will be signed off for 2 weeks and she was fine with it. I ordered my drugs today and got it for £800 cheaper than the clinic. I've got an appointment with a breast consultant next Monday under the 2 week rule.


Have a good week ladies and enjoy the sunshine


----------



## juju81

Amanda, came on this morning.  Start drugs tomorrow and another scan booked for next Tuesday.  I imagine insem will be about 2wks today   


Janah, what's the 2 week rule? Do you get signed off for the run up or after? With my first cycle I wasn't signed off. With Noah's cycle I was from insemination to my 6wk scan.  I'm planning on going into work but if they pee me off and it doesn't work my next cycle ill get signed off,  part of me thinks being at work will make the time go quicker


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## JanaH

Glad AF arrived Juju, I will be signed off from EC until test date. Annoyingly I still need to drive to work for 3 days a week to drop Joseph off at nursery. 2 wk rule is for urgent referrals from your GP so the consultant need to see you within 2 weeks. How was your weekend? Who will be doing your scan next week? I'm seeing Di next Thursday to give them my consent forms, she is off this week.


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## carrie lou

Yay Juju, you're off    


Jana, hope your appointment goes well on Mon  


Amanda, hope AF comes soon  


AFM, AF showed up yesterday so I have my baseline scan booked for Thurs then hopefully can start stims soon after.   


Thanks for all the support re DH and his depression. You ladies are great. I'm just sad that so many of you also have close personal experience of depression, such a horrible illness. I have to say DH is coping really well considering everything that's happened in the last week. His union rep is having a meeting with his boss on Thurs, hopefully we will get some reassurance. And DH is back to his therapy sessions tomorrow after a two week break (therapist has been on holiday, hope she is prepared for this!) so I think that will help too.


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## juju81

Oh Blimey, hope your ok    Hopefully be seeing Di, she's back Monday.  Did they ask you if you wanted to be signed off or is that standard with IVF?


Carrie, fab your AF turned up finally.  Mine was a day late.  Flipping 31 days this cycle    depression is horrid


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## JanaH

Carrie glad AF arrived, hopefully you can start stimming on Thursday.    


No I'm going to ask them to sign me off for the 2 weeks, well you get signed off of EC in any case.


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## carrie lou

Juju, mine was 31 days too, blooming typical, been 28 days like clockwork ever since they came back after BFing but the one month I really want it to be on time   


I never thought about getting signed off - do you get GP to do it or the consultant at clinic? I've told my boss and she was great about it, said I can use annual leave for appointments etc and she doesn't mind that it will often be short notice. I don't really want to be signed off as i like my job and it will help take my mind off the stress. But I'm worried about how I will feel after EC, never having done IVF before. Maybe I will need a few days off?


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## JanaH

Carrie consultant signed me off every time. You can't drive after EC and you will be uncomfortable the day after depending on how many follies and eggs collected, I also suffer with OHSS and are quite swollen. I was in maternity clothes from early on.


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## carrie lou

How long can you not drive for?   I rely on my car to get to work so may be forced to take some time off afterwards


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## JanaH

Definately no driving on the day of EC, but you could do the next day. I was very sore and uncomfortable so slept the whole day afterwards. When do they think EC would be?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie my gave but was ec. I loved the sedation   

Janah have u found s lump?


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## carrie lou

Thanks ladies, I wasn't expecting to drive on the day   but I guess I'll have to wait and see how I feel afterwards, if I have to have a couple of days off work then so be it.   


EC was supposed to be around 23rd July but AF was 3 days late so I suppose that will throw things off a bit.


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## JanaH

Mini - I can feel something, the Gp thinks its Fibroadenoma, but with my family history just wants to make sure, my mom, nan and aunty all died by the age of 47 from breast cancer, and with all the hormone injection I don't want to take any chances.


Carrie - does you clinic do EC over weekends? Is your DH allowed in with you during EC, at my clinic the partners are allowed in.


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## carrie lou

I'm not sure Jana, I know other ladies have definitely had ET on a sunday but I think they would try to avoid EC over weekends. I don't know about partners being in the room - I'll ask when I go for my scan on Thurs. 


Sorry to hear about your lump, such a worry, but hopefully it will turn out to be nothing serious    Good that you don't have to wait too long.


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## ceci.bee

Janah hun my clinic does EC and ET 7/7 - partner's allowed in the room for ET but not EC - hope that helps and am sure your clinic can advise on their policies. I hope the lump gets sorted soon and is nothing to worry about - prob reactive change to all the hormones you have had


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## juju81

Fingers crossed then jana lovely  

Carrie, can't help I'm afraid I'm a IUI bird like you we're  

Popped my first 2 pills today and have lost just over a stone on weight too


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## JanaH

Well done on losing a stone Ju    Yeah you have officially started     


I've lost 10lbs in the last week, with the diet I'm on would like to lose at least 21lbs before treatment.


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## amandaloo

Carrie- I just planned annual leave round ec and et took 2 weeks off but don't think I needed it really but glad i took it .I was a little tender for two days after EC I think it depends how many you get collected . I got 7 collected. Sounds like your boss is understanding . My clinic didn't tell me to get signed off at all ? I remember my friend got a week off after ec by GP . Must be different everywhere? Best of luck with stimming , it depends on when consultant thinks your ready to have ec so yes it could be delayed a little bit because you have started later ...is your husband having CBT? Ps I've just been told at wrk I get 5 days leave if I do another ivf cycle whenever I need it !

Juju - brill news on af and weight loss . I need to get cracking with loosing a bit no motivation 

Jana- sorry to hear about your lump hope its nothing to worry about 

Mm- hello


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## ceci.bee

Janah woohoo with the weight loss that is amazing! 

Amanda loving your new profile pic    he is gorgeous

Carrie - I got signed off sick by my GP for the few days around EC and ET - didnt have any annual leave as I was a student then, and needed time off to rest and relax (I was working in liverpool and living in London so impossible to travel with appointments etc) - and GP was lovely and understanding, wrote a letter about a 'gynaecological condition' that needed surgical treatment and they didn't question it. good luck so exciting!                

ju woo hoo you are also on your way            

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Jana - hope all ok   

Carrie - you should not drive for 24 hours after an anaesthetic or sign legal paperwork. So I could not work on the day or day after EC.

In my first EC when I had 22 eggs collected and boarderline OHSS I was so sore afterwards I could barely move for 4 -5 days. I was in a lot of pain and very bloated. I could not have gone to work and luckily the EC was on Wednesday, I booked the Thursday off and called in sick on Friday, then ET was on Saturday and I was on the mend by Monday, but I had booked A/L in case ET was on day 5.

In hindsight I should have made sure that I had co-codamol in the house as paracetamol was not enough and you need to avoid NSAIDS in the run up to ET.

But I am drowsy on co-codamol and would not be able to work or drive on that.

But second time wiith 10 eggs I was fine the next day and hardly needed any pain killers.

You just never know!


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## JanaH

Carrie good luck for your scan tomorrow. Hope you start stimming tomorrow.


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## carrie lou

Thank you Jana, yes I hope it won't be long


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## amandaloo

Carrie - good luck x


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## pippilongstockings

Carrie - so sorry to hear about your DH's depression and work problems. Depression really sucks   Good luck with this cycle!

juju - woooooohooooooo! You are so bloody patient! It must be over a year since you started thinking about #2? Fingers crossed it's a short wait for your BFP now   

jana - great that they are getting you in so quickly to check your lump.   

Amanda - hope AF arrives soon so you can join juju on the rollercoaster!

Holly - how are you feeling? 

ceci - how's your lovely little man? 

mini and anyone else I've missed - hellooooooo!

No news from me. Still haven't made a decision about #3 although one of my friends has just had a beautiful baby girl and another friend has just told me she's expecting twins (her first baby is only 6 months old! 3 babies under 15 months..... eek), so that's made me swing a bit to "Yes"    On the "no" side, Z is being a right royal pain in the bum at the moment which makes me think I'm crazy to even consider #3! So, no closer to a decision! Going on holiday in a couple of weeks so I guess we can talk about it then. Although, my mum and stepdad have invited themselves along     so maybe we won't get a chance to talk!


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## JanaH

It looks like Joseph's got chicken pox... I so hope it's not, the timing is so bad as I'm due to start treatment in 2 weeks and I can't take any leave at the moment, and have no family in the UK.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hello, Hope all is well.

Carrie hope stimming is good.  

Best of luck Jana - at least you don't have to wait too long.    Sorry to hear LO has CP and might be bad timing.  

Pippi - difficult decision. I am not sure I would cope with 3. I am wondering how I am going to cope with 2 at the moment!

As for us, Down's syndrome risk came back this morning and is 1 in 1900 which is not bad for an oldie like me!
At least i don't have to have anything invasive.
Now trying to sort out nursery fees scheme at work, childcare vouchers etc. to my best advantage for mat leave and beyond. Found out that if your mat pay is calculated on the basis of CCV already deducted you get £243 a month into your CCV account throughout maternity leave, even when only on SMP and no pay! That is a lot of money to help with costs of two when you go back to work.


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## juju81

Hope your scan went well carrie.

Janah, arghhhhhh Noah had them just after his birthday!

Pippi, ooooh just do it.  Someone I know said going from 2-3 was easier then 1-2  . yes your ugly, it been nearly exactly a flaming year.  I have no PMA at all tho and I've already convinced myself its not going to work!

Holly, I love how you always talk in jargon   I have no idea what your talking about half the time    glad your results came back.  If you booted that waste I space out would you not be able to get more help from tax credits?

AFM - I've taken 3 days of clomid an can feel twinges in my ovaries.  All good signs


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly work didn't tell me they pay for child care if using vouchers. We did get it paid for but I would of increases it if I'd known


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yeah they don't tell you as it will cost them!

If your occupational maternity pay is calculated on the basis of you having a salary sacrifice for up to £243 per month in the weeks 17-25 of pregnancy, then obviously your occupational maternity pay will be a bit lower, but then you get £2916 in your childcare voucher account over the period of 12 months even in the zero pay period (£243x12) as it is counted as a ''non cash'' benefit, rather like annual leave entitlement and employment law means that they cannot stop you having it credited every month.


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## JanaH

I need to remember that one, thanks Holly.


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## carrie lou

Holly, that's interesting about childcare vouchers. I didn't know. I get them but not the full amount as Z only goes to cm one day a week. Worth remembering though if I'm ever in that situation 

Pippi, good to hear from you again.   at your friend having three babies under 15 months, enough to make your hair stand on end isn't it! 

Juju, sounds like things are going well 

Thanks for all the good luck messages. Scan went well today, everything as it should be. Unfortunately though my recipient hasn't started her period yet and I can't start stimming until she does. So another waiting game I'm afraid. But I picked up all my drugs today and ready to start injecting as soon as I get the call. In the meantime I have to continue on the nasal spray. Tonight for the first time since starting the DRing I'm feeling pretty yuck, bad headache and a bit queasy too  Hope I can start injecting soon and feel better!


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## pippilongstockings

Juju - no need to be rude


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## pippilongstockings

Carrie - might just be the pollen, its really high at the moment? Fingers crossed you can get going soon


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## juju81

PMSL I'm so sorry pippi, that was obviously meant to say 'right' Christ knows how that got ugly!!!


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## pippilongstockings

I'm very hurt juju


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## hakunamatata

Wow its all go on here, can't wait for some bfps. 

Yes depression is an awful thing for those that suffer and those that try to understand. I'm Defo hoping Addi doesn't suffer bipolar. Hope the redundancy is sorted and its not just one more thing to deal with. X 

Eyes Defo watering at though of 3 under 15 months x 

Big hugs to all x


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## ceci.bee

eek 3 under 15 months is more than a full time job, but like everything in being a parent you just get on with it. Sometimes I think most children do well despite their parents rather than instead of them    - good luck with the decision Pipi - if you don't will you regret it later??

Hakuna lovely to hear from you          how are things? are you having more tx soon or staying on hold a bit longer? There is no reason Addi should inherit bipolar is there? How is she doing? she looks gorgeous in all the pics I have seen.

Ju and Carrie good luck both                   

janah hope the weight loss continues and everything crossed for your next cycle              

All fine here in Africa just working too hard as usual, and so broody to get home and start TTC again next year. Joshi is such a sweetheart, he would be the most lovely big brother   
lots of love to all
ceci


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## juju81

Pippi  

Hak, can you inherit bipolar?  

Ceci, your'll be amazed how quickly tx will come round.  Look at me, a year on I'm finally underway.  Like joshi, Noah will be amazing. He talks about nothing else then having a sister (and trains!) I've started explaining to him about going to the hospital and using donor etc.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

You could always get him a full size train for the garden


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## carrie lou

Hi ladies, i got the call from the clinic this afternoon, my recipient had her scan and everything is OK so tonight I've injected myself for the first time - yikes! Can't say I enjoyed it   it does get easier though, right?  


Ceci, aw, I'm sure Joshi will be an awesome big brother. Don't worry, a year will go by in no time and you'll be starting tx before you know it   


Ju, how are you getting on? I did wonder why you were calling Pippi ugly    


Hak, how are you honey? Any plans for more treatment?  


My best friend has just posted her 12 week scan photo on **, according to DH - I can't bear to look. Does that make me a horrible person


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No it just makes you normal.  

Happy injecting.   I used to quote like doing it.  

I think my coccyx is broken.   it's never been the sane since I had Lucas. It moves   and is uncomfortable to sit on. Anyone else had this?


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## carrie lou

Thanks Mini  


I think I broke my coccyx too but not from childbirth. Months ago I walked backwards into our stair gate  and it was very very painful. I couldn't sit comfortably for a long time afterwards and I can feel my coccyx is not quite straight anymore. But at least it has stopped hurting. Have you seen your GP about it? Maybe some physio could help?


I have a bruise on my tummy today   Did I do it wrong or is this normal?


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## pippilongstockings

Carrie - yes it does get easier, I used to quite enjoy it eventually    I sometimes bruised, sometimes didn't. It helps if you choose a more fleshy area I found. Pinch a good bit up then jab it in    Good luck!


Hak -   


Ceci - when do you get back?    And yes, I do worry about having regrets if we don't go for it    Argh I wish someone could make the decision for me!


Mini - go to the dr. Same happened with my friend and she had physio then an op to sort her coccyx out. Never did quite get back to normal but she's much better now


----------



## juju81

Carrie, glad your stimming now, when is your next scan?  Will you be told if your recipient has a BFP?

Pippi, why don't you give it a shot.  Thn you j or you tried and have no regrets. That kind of what were doing.  If it doesn't work then at least we'll know we tried  

Took my last 2 pills today.  Thank god, they made me feel rotten.  Scan on Tuesday to hopefully see some lovely juicy follies.  Will get my hot water bottle out tomorrow.  Am off for tea at the ritz with mighty mini and some others


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## carrie lou

Ju, I have another scan on Wednesday which will be 5 days after starting stimming. I can find out if my recipient gets pg but only if I ask for this information. They will also tell me the sex of any child and the year they were born. Think I will wait and see if I get a BFP first   Good luck for your scan   



Pippi, definitely go for it, you don't want any regrets


----------



## pippilongstockings

Thanks ladies


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## ceci.bee

Yay Carrie that is great news good luck with the stimms                  . How is your DH? I am not sure if I would want to know about any pg, if I was  I think I would want to know but am not sure. I am thinking about negotiating with my clinic to egg share using my frozen eggs, if I donate them will they cover the costs of the IVF? At 36 I will prob be too old to be an egg-sharer by the time I get back. And yes, bruising totally normal with stimms you are not doing anything wrong.

Mini you might have partially dislocated your Cocyx when you had Lucas so the joint is now loose and moves around when you sit. Ask your GP about it and see if some physio might help.

Ju so excited for you and hoping for a lovely sticky BFP                      

Pipi good luck with the decision, I say go for it, but I know that you had a tough time when both your boys were little and it is scary contemplating going through that again.             

lots of love to everyone
Ceci


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## amandaloo

Carrie - great news you have started stimms . Think I may have had a small bruise off one of my injections too so normal  

Mini - my friend had problems with  hers can remember her saying it really hurt can't quite remember what she did about it though sorry bit useless :-/

Juju - good news you've finished the meds good luck 

Afm - not even started af yet had af pains since I last posted and nothing ! I'm annoyed as the time I booked off maybe useless . It's day 31 today


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## juju81

Amanda mine arrived day 31 too damn it   hopefully your'll get started soon x


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## amandaloo

Juju - started today I was wrong yesterday was day 30 but anyway 31 days is very annoying ! Asked to swap few days about for a/l . When do you usually ov have you been checking? Mine varies between 14 15 and once got 17 days!


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## juju81

I was checking last year when I thought I was likely to have tx but haven't done it since.  I've got enough clearblue smiley face ones anyway so will start testing from about day 11 depending what my scan comes back with Tuesday


It's frustrating isn't it.  Flaming thing


----------



## amandaloo

That's what I bought on your advice from eBay  hope we weren't bidding against each other ha! Yes very annoying especially when it was teasing me with af pains all that time !


----------



## juju81

Ha ha, I bought mine last year, buy it now


----------



## amandaloo

Hi 

Carrie - any updates ?

Jana- how's things going with you. ?

Just being nosey seeing if anyone is any further along! 

Lost few pounds which I'm happy about like to loose another 3 if possible .


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## juju81

I've been for my scan....2 follies at 14, 1 at 11 and a lining at 8 all on day 9.  I'm starting to feel positive about this cycle now   


Well done on the loss Amanda, feels great doesn't it


----------



## JanaH

Well done JuJu, when is your next scan or are you just testing until you surge?


----------



## juju81

She said if I lived nearer she'd have me in Friday but as I don't I start testing tomorrow.  I'm not wasting 2 tests tomorrow so will start Thursday.  I know I won't ovulate tomorrow.  Are you up there Thursday?


----------



## carrie lou

Juju, well done, that's a good number of follies   


Amanda, well done on the weight loss   


I have my scan tomorrow, been stimming for 5 days, not sure whether to expect any progress yet or not... Have felt one or two twinges around my ovaries but nothing major really.


----------



## JanaH

Yes, I'm seeing her Thursday afternoon. Luckily we are only about 20 min from them.


Carrie good luck for you scan tomorrow.


I'm good thanks Amanda, had my hospital appointment yesterda with the breast consultant. She said she could feel something hard, but she said is not sure what it is. I'm booked in for a scan on Thursday morning, she is also writing to my GP to refer me back when I turn 39 for scans and mammograms every year until I'm 50. Joseph is still at home with chickenpox. I should receive my meds on Friday so excited, hope AF arrives on time.


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- oh great news bet your super pleased    . Yes I'm pleased as on af so hoping I might have lost more by next week fingers crossed . I have been eating salads quite a lot . 

Carrie- good luck with your scan     you will be surprised how quick things start moving from now on 

Ceci - I've no idea about if clinic would cover costs if you donate frozen eggs ? Could you ring a few up and ask or email them? 

Hope all goes well with the scan on Thursday  . And fingers crossed your af arrives on time  

Amanda


----------



## amandaloo

Juju and carrie any news?


----------



## juju81

None from me,  still waiting for my surge.  Day 12 today so hopefully over weekend.  My cousins just announced she's pregnant


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- oh no    always makes your heat sink hearing news like that we can't just get pregnant that easy :-((( let's hope you will be making your announcement soon too . Keep positive . Do you get scanned again before you have the iui ? Just wondered if you do if having medicated cycle ?


----------



## hakunamatata

oh ju sorry to hear that, just think with those lovely follies it could be you soon sweetie, you will have a lovely bump again, you will have a lovely bump again (and not from your cream teas lol) well done on weight loss both you and amanda are doing fab. mine is slowly going down, but managing to have some treats to keep me sane.
carie hope you get some juicy follies at your scan and remember its not a numbers game, its quality. 8-10 is fabulous.
holly hope youre feeling ok, well done on scan results.
love reading girls just done always get a chance to post. addi keeps me on my toes, loving the new words she comes out with but she can be a menace, like them all im sure.
pippi you go girl with no 3
ceci hope gorgeous j is ok.
big hugs to everyone, janah hope af arrives soon so youre up and running.
we are off to butlins in sept which falls at the wrong time for a cycle so oct it will have to be. i still wonder how i will cope but cant not try, the desire is too strong. on the whole im feeling good. im loving the weather and time in the garden, tho addi is mischievious and removes heads of flowers if theyre not guarded. im not looking forward to going to bbq at mil on sunday. oh the challenges lol


----------



## carrie lou

Hak, glad you are feeling well honey. I think this weathers certainly helps. Zac is also a little monkey in the garden, riding his bike over the veggie patch and tipping the compost out of pots - one of my plants has been re-homes three times now   All part of the fun of toddlerhood though isn't it.   A holiday sounds nice to look forward to and you will be able to start tx all relaxed and de-stressed  


Ju, oh dear, it is always hard hearing about other people getting pregnant.   Hope you get your surge soon.  


I had another scan today. 8 follies over 10mm and four or five smaller ones that should catch up in time. Hopefully EC on Thurs or Fri next week.   Will be decided after my next scan on Mon. I'm obsessing now about how many eggs I will get, have to get at least 8 in order to egg share


----------



## hakunamatata

you should get 8 from that crop, thats fab, keep up the pma. xx


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## amandaloo

Carrie - wow thats really good and sounds great fingers crossed     and you already have 8 plus the rest and they have ages to get bigger yet. Pma you will get more than 8    .. I didnt know you had to get 8 to share what happens if you don't ? I just assumed you would just share what you got ?? 

Hak - lovely to hear from you  they keep you on your toes don't they     my Ds runs away saying bye bye and catch me ! Glad to hear you will be starting again soon


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

It is 8 to share. If you get less you have the option of donate all or pay for the cycle and keep all. They won't let you share again though.


----------



## JanaH

Ju keep positive, O remember last year when I found out I was having a miscarriage that my sister was a far pregnant as me.


Carrie the rest will catch up, they still have time to grow


Amanda when are you starting tx?


Hak enjoy butlins in Sept and start your next cycle fresh, you are strong you will get through it.


Holly how are you?


Well I had a hell of a week... First Joseph got chicken pox, we where lucky to get a friend to look after him. I went to work on Monday and had my breast consultant appointment. She wrote to my GP to refer me again when I'm 40 to be scanned and have mammograms yearly until I reach 50 for surveillance. She organised a scan which I had yesterday, they saw a lump and did an core biopsy, and omw I'm sore. I felt so bad for not looking after my son, I emailed my manager and said I'm taking the rest of the week off. I had my appointment at the clinic yesterday to take all my paperwork. I had my meds delivered today, my fridge is pack with medication. Now I'm just waiting for AF to arrive. I'm doing race for life on Sunday, hope its a bit cooler. We are going the lavender fields tomorrow for some photos looking forward to it.


Have a good weekend e everyone


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, ouch, hope you're OK after the biopsy, when do you get results?   Enjoy the race for life, I did it. Few years ago with some girls from work, was fun but very hot  


Hak, thanks honey, I hope you're right   


Amanda, yes you have to get 8 eggs to share as they guarantee at least 4 for the recipient. If you get fewer, at my clinic you have three options a) you keep all for yourself but then have to pay the full cost of IVF b) you give 4 to the recipient and keep whatever's left for yourself, or c) you donate all to the recipient and can come back for a free cycle of IVF for yourself at a later date. Fingers crossed it won't come to that for me   I don't suppose they would have let me egg share if they didn't think I had a good chance of producing enough eggs.


----------



## JanaH

On what dosis are you Carrie and are you using Gonal F?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Jana   
Have you got the results? Presumably you cannot go ahead with fertility treatment until you have the all clear?


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, I'm on menopur, 225 units a day.


----------



## JanaH

Holly will get the results next week. The sonographer did mark it as urgent but could take up to 5 working days I will chase them. No one said to stop treatment so I'm still going ahead.


I used menopur on my first cycle but did not respond well on it. For this cycle they upped my Gonal F dosis from 225 to 300 unit a day and I asked to do the short cycle as I hate d/r. My AMH came down from 11 to 7.


----------



## juju81

Janah, really hope the tests come back as nothing hun.  Must be a worrying time for you.  I don't blame you having time off.  

Can someone explain to me why they said I should be having Ivf with an amh of 3? Surely that will just make me run out of eggs quicker? Or am I being really blonde?!  

I surged today, goin in tomorrow.  Am waiting for the on call nurse to call me back.  My work have been warned I might not be in Monday because treatment could be Monday.  My work give me 10 days for tx which I match with annual leave or flexi leave and so my next day off is a 'work' day.  I'm tempted to still tell them I'm going in on Monday and lying in my bed with my feet in the air


----------



## JanaH

Wooohoooo exciting times juju


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Juju - you wouldn't run out of eggs quicker hun. The ovaries have a number of follicles every month that pop up and start, most wither away as one becomes dominant. This happens every month - for someone with good ovarian reserve - maybe 20-30 eggs every month will try and one will become dominant. With someone with low ovarian reserve 2-3 will start up and one may become dominant.

In IVF they shut down all the natural hormones and then give a huge dose of FSH to stimulate all the follicles that pop up to the same degree in the hope that they all become mature and produce eggs, not just the one dominant follicle in a natural cycle.

So whether you would do IVF or not you will still be losing the same number of eggs evey month - with IVF hopefully you would actually make more of the eggs that you have left useful and capable of turning into a baby.

Jana - I hope the lump is nothing and that treatment is not affected.   The high levels of oestrogen produced by the follicles would not be good if it is something. I am surprised that they have not told you to wait.


----------



## JanaH

Ju are you driving to the clinic tomorrow?


----------



## juju81

Ah that's sense holly.  Basically they say Ivf because then I'd potentially end up with more follicles 

Janah, yep driving.  I only go by train if nik can't get time off work xx


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - exciting news very pleased for you  best of luck for tomorrow will be eagerly awaiting updates 

Jana - what a lot to go through hope your ok and it turns out to be nothing . Hope af comes soon so you can start 

Carrie- how interesting I never knew that . You will get more than 8 anyway with sounds of it . Ps you have loads more than I had ! I only got 7 on collection didn't grow that many but they were all pretty big ones so I got told .


----------



## JanaH

Juju, I was going to say if you have time tomorrow to stop at the lavender fields in Banstead it's amazing we where there this morning Joseph loved it, we took loads of photos. Its calles Mayfield lavender fields.


----------



## amandaloo

Jana - the lavender fields sound lovely


----------



## JanaH

I've added loads of photo's on **, and I just tried to change my profile picture on here but it doesn't seem to work so will try again in the morning.


----------



## juju81

Bum janah, were not taking Noah with us, he's staying at my mums.  I'm on ** if you want to be friends.  Totes understand if not  

I'm panicking.  I was in so much pain all through the night not I've woken up in no pain and think I've ovulated   is it all over already


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- honestly it might not have been that . My last cycle I tracked and I felt pain and was absolutely convinced that I was ovulating to the point I kept testing that day no ovulation and day after wasn't either . Then I thought I'd missed it altogether was weird I didn't ovulate until day 17 . It could be anything ? Anyway doesn't the egg last for quite a while anyway ?

Jana I'm on ** too . Ps I've got a picture of Noah in one of them horse and carriage things like your profile picture now x


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, don't worry honey, I was also in quite a bit of pain before my IUI. In any case it doesn't matter if you ovulate before basting because the egg can live for 24 hours, so it will be there ready and waiting for the sperm   Good luck for today


----------



## amandaloo

Juju-if it was ovulation it would be perfect timing xx


----------



## juju81

Thanks girls, jeez the worrying of treatment.  I just found all my posts from my first cycle and I had treatment pretty much the same as this will be timings wise.


And I forgot you have to have a full bladder


----------



## amandaloo

the full bladder thing is a nightmare I always end up absolutely bursting ! One of times had to go loo and let a bit out


----------



## JanaH

Ju - don't worry to much and don't forget to drink     good luck for today


I don't mind adding you on ** sent me a pm and I will do it.


----------



## juju81

Will do janah,


I'm driving nick insane with my worrying.  I think he might divorce me by the time this days over let alone 9months potentially.  I can feel myself getting uptight about it.  How can I flipping relax


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Deep breathing, meditation and mindfulness. Just enjoy every minute of today - look at the flowers, see the grass in the breeze, look at the bee. Takes your mind off things. And big lungfuls of air with your eyes closed and the sun on your face.


----------



## juju81

Thank holly and janah!

Well I'm officially PUPO.  OTD 4th August   and so the madness begins.

I'm a bit bloated to be honest, and getting cramps.  Had a sample of 31million, not as much as my other 2 cycles but still loads more then we have anyway ha ha


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - congrats on being pupo  .


----------



## Fizzypop

Well done ju x keeping everything crossed for you xxx


----------



## pippilongstockings

Oooooooh       Juju x


----------



## ceci.bee

yay Ju fab news PUPO at last!


----------



## Lindz

Hi everyone
Just popping in quickly to wish Ju lots of luck. All sounds perfect timing wise and 31million really is quite a lot! How many follicles did you have in the end?  
X


----------



## juju81

Thanks lovelies.  I'm in a bit of discomfort from bloating tbh  

I'm not sure how many lindz, had 3 on Tuesday so I'm thinking at least 2 as both were 14mm in Tuesday.  Just like one to fertilise tho


----------



## Lindz

I'm saying nothing!


----------



## carrie lou

Congrats on being PUPO Ju, good luck  31 million is loads! I think I only had 13 million or so.


----------



## juju81

Lindz, I had 3 follies with Noah! And my first tx actually.  Crumbs, I so wouldn't cope with twins ha ha

Carrie, cheers lovely.  It is loads really.  I had more with my other 2 tho. It just takes one


----------



## amandaloo

How do they count them


----------



## juju81

No idea.  By hand



























 . They must have a machine.  Holly will know


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I am sure they must do something like dilute a tiny micro measured drop in special fluid and then spread it on a grid like slide where they can then count a small section and then calculate it scaled up.

When we did microbiology we did serial dilution of the sample where we wanted to measure the number of bugs that was in it and got it down to a dilution where we could count.

So if you dilute it 1 part to 1million, you can then scale it back up.

Or they have a special machine!

Triplets might be more than you bargained for


----------



## juju81

See Amanda, knew holly would know  

How many hours to go until I can test


----------



## carrie lou

At least 24 Ju     


I have another scan tomorrow, hoping things are growing - I haven't felt as many twinges these last couple of days, which worries me   but maybe it's just cos I've had a lazy quiet sort of weekend


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)




----------



## juju81

Carrie I'm sure everything will be fine Hun xx


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - good luck today    be thinking about you .   

Juju- keep away from google and tests lol 

Holly - ah that's how they do it !


----------



## juju81

Amanda ill try   


Carrie, how come you decided to do IVF and not IUI again?


----------



## carrie lou

A number of reasons Ju - mainly I wanted to egg share and help someone else the same way we have all been helped. It's something I've wanted to do pretty much since Z was born. Also it made sense financially - we are paying this time obviously and egg sharing works out about the same price as one cycle of IUI and has much higher success rates. And we only have 3 units of sperm left and don't want to waste them on tx with lower odds of success. 


Well I had my scan - 10 good sized follies looking ready, so booked in for EC on Wednesday. Just   I have enough eggs to share. I'm really nervous now


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - that's great your sure to have enough to share  . Just read your reply to juju makes sense what you said . Think I would have tried egg sharing too but obviously I'm too old now . Best of luck for ec hope it goes well


----------



## pippilongstockings

Ooh carrie good luck!    

Amanda - how are you getting on    

juju - I reckon you could start testing in the next couple of days    I think my earliest test was about 5 days after basting    (it was BFN by the way!)


----------



## JanaH

What do you all class as day 1 of AF?


----------



## carrie lou

My clinic said it's the first day you wake up with bright red blood. Check with your clinic though as they might do things differently.


----------



## juju81

Janah SO say bright red blood before 4pm   


Pippi     my clearblues from eBay came this morning. I'm convinced today it hasn't worked. I'm so fed up already


----------



## ceci.bee

Good luck Carrie and Ju


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

JanaH it's full flow before midday. 

Ju


----------



## JanaH

Carrie good luck for tomorrow, sorry Dh can't be there with you.


----------



## juju81

Minx, at our clinic it's before 4.  Janah is at my clinic


----------



## amandaloo

At mine it's just first day of af

Pippi- not even started testing for ovulation yet will start day 12 which is Thursday 

Juju- PMA    

Just a quick one is this weird my clinic tell me to wait three hours before I go loo then put the night sample in a bottle then in fridge ... Then in morning test urine if neg throw one in fridge if positive test one in fridge if that's positive go in that day if one in fridge neg go next day . Seemed an odd way to do it putting it in fridge but suppose it would save me on tests? Oh and I've to take out fridge half he before I test


----------



## juju81

WTF??   I just tested morning and night! Seems a faff!


----------



## juju81

I really need to stay away from google.  I've been googling and have convinced myself it hasn't worked.  I freaking hate this.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

JU        Please!! What the hell are you going to feel right now??!!!!!   


It's probably only just fertilising you muppet!! STOP GOOGLING YOU WILL DRIVE YOURSELF IN SANE!!!!


----------



## juju81

I know, I know all this when I stop and think.  Nick is so fed up with me


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - stop googling !!!! Noooooo!!!! It's just worst thing you can do . I've promised myself there's no way I'm googling this time . I drove myself insane with it


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju just enjoy your time with Noah.    If its meant to be...........    There's nothing you can do to change it (says the google monster)


----------



## ceci.bee

Ju hun        you have now had 3 IUIs and got pg twice and are waiting about the third. you have good fertility and have a *great* chance with this IUI - please try to hold off on the google and the       until nearer OTD you will only drive yourself and Nick  otherwise and the stress you are putting on yourself may actually lower your chances of getting a BFP. Deep breath, do fun outdoor things with Noah and try to hang on until OTD if you can              

Carrie hun good luck today              

Amanda have no idea about urine in fridge have never heard of it before...............but I guess they have their reasons.......      

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## pippilongstockings

Juju I totally understand, I would be (and was   ) exactly the same. Hang in there


----------



## carrie lou

Hi ladies, I had EC a couple of hours ago and got 10 eggs   5 for me and 5 for my recipient. I'm really happy   and just hope they're good ones now   


Juju honey it's far too early to tell anything. The little embryo won't even be implanting for a few days yet. Pleeeease try not to google anything. I'm not one to talk as have been googling follicles and egg numbers etc for IVF the last couple of days, but all it did was make me even more anxious! And everything turned out fine so it was a total waste of energy! Hang in there, you are young and have a good track record with IUI, there is every reason to believe this will work for you  


Amanda, I've never heard of the wee in the fridge business either, it does seem a hassle but I suppose they know what they're doing


----------



## JanaH

Well done Carrie -     for good fertilization.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - that's great news well done   will be hoping they get jiggy now for you !   

I think I might just test can't see point of putting it in fridge makes no difference   . Did all you iui ppl wait three hours to pee before you tested?


----------



## carrie lou

I can't honestly remember Amanda - I know I tested first thing with my early morning wee so that would have been more than 3 hours. But not sure about evening testing.  


Thanks ladies for your good wishes


----------



## juju81

Fab news carrie, come on eggs and spermies, do you thing    I think because it has worked before I've got this expectation that it will work and if it doesn't I'm gonna look a d1ck.  I shouldn't just assume it will work so I'm negative about it instead!


Amanda, no, I didnt specifically leave it 3hrs! I tested morning, then about 6ish, just when I needed the loo


----------



## amandaloo

Juju -    you won't look a dick   . Think your thinking negative to try and protect yourself  . This bloomin process is never easy is it so damn hard :-/ . Have you got something planned for this weekend to distract yourself xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Think positive thoughts ju  

Carrie well done. Ate you having icsi?


----------



## carrie lou

No I don't think so Mini. My clinic said they rarely need to do icsi with donor sperm. Hope not anyway as it's an extra £1000 or thereabouts   Anyway I should get a call tomorrow to find out how they are doing


----------



## hakunamatata

Congrats in ec Carrie 10 is perfect. Hiw you feeling, hopefully not too sore. Good luck for tomorrows call. 

Ju my sweetie be kind to yourself and don't expect so much. Spend time pampering not googling!

Amanda pee in fridge, strange but logical LOL


----------



## juju81

I'm trying to think positive.  Can't have minx calling me a muppet again   


So this evening I had some cramping mid tummy area and my nipples and boobs have started to become sore and sensitive and I'm so tired.  Now, I realise this couldn't possibly be any signs yet, it's only been 3 days since.  Can't, can it?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Well Ju - I have those signs when my embryo is in the lab on day three   

Sore boobs for me came after the trigger shot as it is high dose HCG which wears off about 9 days in, and from when I get to about 7 weeks pregnant.

First signs of pregnancy for me are stretching pains, round ligament pain when I cough or sneeze (they say you can't get this before the 2nd trimester, but I have had it as one of the first signs in all three pregnancies, this time before I peed on stick - I knew as I had felt the familiar pains), slight nausea and very strong sense of smell. Usually about 2-3 days before test date which for my clinic is 17-18 days post egg collection/ovulation.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - good luck with your phone call today from the lab      

Juju- you never know    did you have any signs before ?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

It wouldn't of implanted yet would it? 

Carrie sometimes the eggs don't let fertilisation happen. We had no fertilisation with our first lot of donor sperm. My eggs were hard   I don't know why they don't do icsi as an insurance policy. I knew deep down that we wouldn't get anything without icsi. It was 6k down the drain.


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie woo hoo! 10 eggs great and really hope there was lots of lab love for you and the receipient                             

Ju 3 days is too short for implantation - the embryo can only implant when it is a blastocyst by day 5 or 6 unless it is a super-embie!                    and agree with Hakuna - pampering not googling is the way forward


----------



## carrie lou

Oh no Mini don't tell me that   I'm waiting for the phone call today, it's going to be agonising now   


Thanks Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie you'll be fine   iui worked for u and you are alot younger than me


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - you will be fine I'm sure of it


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - that is fab number of eggs - I had 10 in my last cycle and look what I have ended up with - (hopefully   ) 2 babies!

I did ICSI with both my cycles as the clinic advised it. They said that donor sperm swims slowly and it can be more guaranteed that they will fertilise all the eggs if they do ICSI - I had 8 mature eggs and 100% fertilisation. But don't forget nearly 40 year old eggs can have tough shells. I just did not want to waste anything at my age.

Having said that I do not know what would have happened with IVF and I can't help be a little cynical and wonder if they just like making an extra £450 (reduced price for donor sperm at the time I did it) per cycle. It might even be a standard £850 -1000 now.

I am sure you will get a great phonecall!


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Holly, I hope you are right   I'm still waiting for the call...


At my initial appointment they said they don't often need to do icsi with donor sperm as it's good quality, but told me the price anyway so made it sound like they would just go ahead and do it if needed rather than let all this be wasted - I hope so anyway. I would rather find the extra grand and pay for icsi now than have to go through the whole process again.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - it's a long time ago but I'm sure they told me they decide at the time they go for Ivf but if need to do they do iCsi ?  . The clinic knows what's best for your fertilization . Your going to get a great phone call


----------



## carrie lou

Good news - 4 of my 5 fertilised. The 5th was immature so of those that could fertilise, all did    I'm so happy   I'm provisionally booked for transfer on Saturday but hoping they will go to blastocyst and be transferred on Monday   


Thank you ladies for all your support


----------



## amandaloo

I knew it ))) fantastic news xx


----------



## juju81

Fab news Carrie  

I'm going a bit mental so I'm going to lay low for the next week or so

I'll update as soon as I can


----------



## carrie lou

Totally understand Juju. Good luck


----------



## ceci.bee

Yay Carrie that is wonderful, good luck for transfer                    

Ju            we will still be thinking of you and wishing you good luck


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Well done carrie.   do you know about the other 5?


----------



## carrie lou

No I didn't ask Mini, not sure if they will tell me at this stage, but I'm curious - might ask when I go for transfer


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- hope you are ok the 2 ww does drive you mad I'm not looking forward to it . Hope to hear from you soon xx


----------



## JanaH

Just a quick update - started my injections and tablets today, next scan Wednesday and so far EC is planned for the 6th.


----------



## amandaloo

Jana - owwww great news hope the downreg goes well. X

I've started testing for ovulation yesterday might be a long wait !


----------



## JanaH

Amanda I'm doing short protocol this time no d/r for me again. Hope you get your smiley soon.


----------



## ceci.bee

Good luck janah and Amanda!                

Carrie and Ju                     hope all goes ok for transfer this weekend Carrie

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Got a positive tonight so looks like ill be going in tomorrow morning


----------



## carrie lou

Fantastic news - my four embies are all doing well and we're going for blast transfer on Monday   


Amanda, good luck honey   


Jana, great to hear you are getting started


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- that's great sounds like you have got some great emmbies there   

I'm just waiting to hear what time to go this morning I'm excited


----------



## JanaH

Carrie thats good news, how many are you transferring?    


Amanda hope you hear soon as to what time to be there.


----------



## amandaloo

Well officially joined the madness of the 2ww  all went well the sperm has 60 percent motility and there was 35 million ! Not quite sure what it all means but the nurse said it was good  . 

Best of luck for Monday Carrie


----------



## carrie lou

Yay Amanda   35 million is fab, I didn't have that many when I conceived Zac   


Thanks Jana and Amanda   I'm really not sure how many to have transferred... I'm really worried about the risks of a twin pregnancy so my head is saying have one. But we have so much invested in this, I really want it to work so badly. And my heart is saying have two and maximise our chances  Guess I will have to discuss it with them on the day. I don't think they will be happy about transferring two so maybe the decision will be out of my hands.


----------



## amandaloo

How old are you Carrie? They wouldn't transfer two in my first ever Et as they had policy and was under 36 at the time . Over 36 they will negotiate . The embryologist really help you decide anyway . When I was having ET second and third time with FET I could choose as was old enough  . I had one first time then two the next ... If you had all of them remaining all blasts you could have one then freeze rest and maybe have more next time. ?? You will know you have made right decision on the day xx


----------



## carrie lou

I'm 32 Amanda, so I think they will probably say no to two. The consultant I saw at my first appointment said it would be a discussion between us but made it sound like they would argue strongly against putting two back. Yes we will freeze any that we don't transfer, so will have a back up plan just in case


----------



## amandaloo

They do put two back if they feel that's the right thing to do in that situation as know people at your age that have had two put back x


----------



## amandaloo

Ps wish I was 32 again


----------



## carrie lou

I wish I was 28 again Amanda   


I guess I'll have to wait and see what they recommend. If they only put one back I'll be ok with it, I know it's the sensible thing after all


----------



## hakunamatata

carrie so pleased things are going so well. 
amanda wow you werent waiting as long as you thought hey! congrats on being pupo, all sounds good.
congrats on starting janah thats fabulous, all go on here, its great xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Amanda congrats  

Carrie hmmmm especially it being a blast they will defo try to put you off having 2. I thought nhs had written a policy on under 36s having just one put back. ? 

So much going on here lately. I feel the odd one out   I might join you


----------



## amandaloo

Mini -  are you serious ! Yes mini you are right my clinic wouldn't let me when I was 35 they had a policy for one only . But I sometimes think dependent on what you have to put back they might consider . Doubt they would if all blasts though 

What a night been up with Noah majority of night he must have a bug he has been sick lots


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, poor Noah - hope he feels better soon. Zac has had so many sickness bugs, and it's always so horrible   Hope you don't get it too.   


Mini, yes I'm sure there is a policy. I'm with a private clinic this time though, not sure if that makes a difference. The more I think about it though I'm leaning towards having only one put back anyway.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie only joking


----------



## juju81

Hi girls,

An feeling a bit better, not much more positive but not so down if that makes sense,

Amanda, fab news hun, when is OTD. Good count too  

Carrie, what fab news about your embies, definitely is quality over quantity   good luck for tomorrow   

Minx, do it, dare ya  

So I think my bodies playing tricks on me, I've had a cramping since insem, sore boobs, twinges down below yesterday an today a stitch like pain.  Didn't last long tho.  I just pray its a BFP this week.  Not sure can go through this again! I'm even thinking of testing Friday.  Got a BFP 2 days early with my first cycle and day early with Noah's cycle.  Google (!) has both outcomes when I put in my symptoms! I mean lets face it, there is only 2 outcomes!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - are you on pegesterone or something along them lines ? They don't half play tricks on you .   . I had very simular symptoms with bfp And bfn 'swith pegesterone .  It's a right pain  .. Otd is 14 days from Insem they said test if my af does not arrive in 14 days


----------



## juju81

No I'm not on any support.  I'm going to demand some tomorrow though!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - what type if symptoms did you get last time? Oh well it's not drugs then Was just a thought ..You have a fab track record with iui must be a positive thing .  . How many days do you test after Insem then?

Carrie - good luck for tomorrow and hope its an easy decision for you 

Noah has just thrown up everywhere again I'm praying I don't catch this bug .. It's weird don't know how to feel after iui as always had drugs and treatment before  .. I shouldn't feel much for quite a few days should I ? I'm used to having a blast put back so always usually looking for signs straight away !!


----------



## juju81

2wks Amanda, so next Sunday is OTD.  Implantation doesn't happen until around 6/7 days after.  My last 2 cycles I've had continuous cramping, dizziness, sore boobs! It's hard not to get my hopes up  

Oh dear, poor Noah   hopefully it's just 24hrs and you don't  get it


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- sounds all positive to me  ^reiki .. It's a nightmare this 2 ww. I've already googled how long does lh surge last and what's happens after iui lol !!! Saying that not been on google as much as previous cycles ! I've been looking at holidays in September !


----------



## juju81

Oooooh where you looking at?


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, with my IUI I honestly didn't notice any symptoms until about 3-4 days before OTD. Then started with a bit of brown spotting, and later cramps and bloating. I think it takes at least that long for the hormone levels to rise enough to make a difference. I'd test at 14 days if I were you, you should get a reliable result by then. Sorry to hear Noah still being sick, it's awful isn't it   With Zac's last bug he was throwing up for about 3 days, my washing machine didn't know what hit it


----------



## amandaloo

A variety of places ! Haven site in Cornwall / Devon . Been looking at holidays abroad too but won't go abroad if I get pg . It's nice to look though  isn't it !!!I fancy going to Greece next time with Noah think he could just about manage a flight that long .. Haven site pretty booked up though not much to choose from and quite dear too .

Carrie - my washer has been on all day ! Thanks for the info )


----------



## juju81

I tested positive 12dpdiui   

We've done 2 long flights with Noah now and a shorter one.  To be fair the shorter one was the hardest but I think that was his age! Centre parc is lush but expensive of going on yor own.  Some nice haven/hoseasons down in Dorset too.  I love Dorset


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju don't test too early. It might be bfn then you'll feel dreadful. Might as well wait on day 13-14.   no point in taking cyclogest. They just hold onto a pg that may naturally come away. You've not dove a medicated cycle (apart from the pill) so let your body do its thing. You're doing great.   your body us doing everything it should.


----------



## juju81

I know but I didn't use cyclgest with my first and miscarried so feel like I want it for my own piece of mind.  I had it with Noah   she's testing my levels tomorrow.  I tested 12 days with Noah and got a bfn so stuck my finger up at the test and tested again the next day and got BFP! I don't think I can hold off much longer, pippi, where's my backup to testing early


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - I always test early lol ! But I think this time I might hold off as not a 5 day transfer think I will give it time !!! I say that now :-/ .. I drove myself insane on negative cycles when I tested early and got bfn with what ifs and constantly googling . Take it nurse is testing your progesterone levels . Hope aapt goes well ..


----------



## juju81

Yep and she's scanning me to check follies have gone etc.  I will hold off and test Saturday morning


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Are  you at the clinic tomorrow? I tested 2 days early and got a neg. I posted on here that it was all over then tested on otd just to tell the clinic officially and got bfp


----------



## juju81

No, she's doing a personal visit to my home    Of course at the clinic


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Oi d1ck I didn't see Amanda's post then you posted  and missed that too


----------



## juju81

My sisters coming, nik couldn't get the arvo off work and driving is cheape but I hate driving far on my own so dragging my sis along again   we'll get Starbucks on the way home!  No joke, my boobs hurt so much I had to put my bra back on


----------



## amandaloo

Owwwwwwww


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

honeslty ju if you're not on cyclogest then your body is doing lots on its own!!      Bum bullets causes you to have sore boobs but youre not on it!


----------



## carrie lou

Is that why my boobs are hurting  I'm on cyclogest and not enjoying it very much! Ju, I really wouldn't worry - your body knows what to do on its own. As fas as I understand it, you only need progesterone support if you've been DRing because then all your natural hormones are switched off  (sure Holly will correct me if I'm wrong here!)


Well girls I'm off to get my embryo this morning     Think I've decided to be sensible and go for just one. We will freeze the others.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah it gives you pregnancy symptoms. Your boobs will hurt like hell  

Good luck carrie


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - Exciting ) I think your making the right decision    keeping everything crossed for you   . Hope you have 4 perfect blasts     . Yes cyclogest does give you symptoms its really confusing  

Juju- hope your appt puts your mind at ease . Still thinking about the holiday, we went to Dorset last year to a haven that was nice too .. Wish I booked earlier as prices are higher than I usually pay


----------



## juju81

Good luck today Carrie  

Amanda, you might b able to get a really late deal?

I had some right old stretching pains going on last night, the actually made me catch my breath.  I'm getting stretchy pains today too  i just pray its not my body make me think I am


----------



## hakunamatata

All sounds very promising Ju but bodies can be cruel hope its doing its thing!

Good luck today Carrie how exciting


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

It wasnt a medicated cycle  ju so I'm sure your body is doing its thang!


----------



## JanaH

Carrie - hope your transfer went smoothly     


Juju twinges and pulling sounds good    how was your appointment at SO


----------



## juju81

Just got back jana! Kim said when he was doing the scan I won't be able to see anything but what I can see looks really positive and gave me the thumbs up.  My boobs are tingling as I type!


----------



## JanaH

Glad you are more positive


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - that is great news isn't it sounds so promising   

Carrie how's it gone? 

I've had a real day had to take Noah to a and e was at my friends was using his travel booster chair and he pushed back on the table and chair went flying backward and he banged his head on her stone floor :-/ anyway he's ok thank goodness


----------



## carrie lou

Hi ladies, I am pupo   with one lovely hatching blast, it's a 5bb which apparently is good. The doc was really nice and left it up to us whether to put one or two back, but after talking over the risks and the numbers, we opted for just one. Putting two back doesn't increase our chances much but does give a massive chance of twins (45%) which worried me. Afterwards DH and I went out for lunch which was lovely to have some "us" time (Zac was with my mum all day) which doesn't often happen. 


So let the lunacy begin   


My other embies are lagging behind a bit, they will decide tomorrow whether to freeze them or not.


Amanda, so sorry to hear about your A&E visit, but glad he is OK, they are tough little munchkins really   


Juju, glad you are feeling more positive


----------



## ceci.bee

Yay carrie and Ju fab news have everything                          for you both

And for Jana and Amanda who are coming up soon                          

am soooooooooooooooo broody cheering you on - I told DH I wanted to be pg by my next birthday (july next year) and he ho'd and hum'd a bit I think I will persuade him   

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci- I'm in 2 ww already had iui sat !  hope you can pursuade your hubby !

Carrie- yay congratulations when's your otd? Hope your other embbies make it to the big freeze


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, they didn't give me a specific OTD but I think I will test 2 weeks after EC which will be next Wed.   


Ceci, yeah something to aim for


----------



## juju81

Fab news carrie     come on blast, implant    Nothing wrong with having 'you' time.  We might be parents but we are still hubby and wife who are entitled to alone time.  We're out Saturday night, Noah's at nicks mums, I can't wait to spend some time with nick!


Ceci, not long really, when do you land back in the UK? Will it feel weird coming back? Do you have anywhere to live?


Cheers girls.  I'm such a freak.  I've gone from being totally negative to feeling like its definately worked and I need to rein it in a bit because I'm going to be so disappointed at the weekend if its negative


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - think my clinic gave me otd of 12 days later maybe bit more with a 5 day blast . Some clinics still say 14 .. 

Juju - so good you have your pma back can't wait to hear your news 

Jana - how you getting on ?


----------



## MultiMum

Hi ladies,


I've been reading but not posting. I'm 11 weeks 2 days pregnant at the mo.


Someone was asking about when to test after a blast. The clinics give you the very latest test date - if if you are not pregnant by then there is no way it can be a false negative. I have always tested early. In my experience you can usually get a positive test 5 days after a blast transfer but if it's two it can come up positive sooner on a HPT. I've always found First REsponse to be more sensitive than the others.


I've had a hell of a time and am in a high risk pregnancy (multiple C sections before and bleeding in this pregnancy). But.....I'm pregnant! Keep having to pinch myself.


----------



## juju81

Hi multi mum, congratulations on your preg, hope the rest of it goes without any stress,


Carrie, I would have thought testing in 9days is the earliest as that will then make it 14days later if that makes sense?


My PMA has gone.  I cramped through the night and did a test this morning and got BFN    I don't know why I expected it to be BFP at 9dpdiui but couldn't help myself


----------



## carrie lou

Welcome Multimum   congrats on your pregnancy. I know you from the jan/feb thread  


Juju, yeah I think I will test at 9 days post transfer. Don't worry about your BFN honey, it's far too soon   stay positive!


My DH is being such a stupid selfish   at the moment, can't believe we are trying to have another baby together! I can't bear the sight of him


----------



## juju81

Maybe it's your hormones Carrie! Is he feeling any better?


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- heck it's too early to test ! Don't loose that pma keep away from tests till he weekend . Don't forget you got a bfn on Noah's didn't you one day then next you got your bfp . Think I'm going mad too as been feeling sick for past few days !!! It's surely impossible to feel sick when implantation hasn't even happened . Noah got a sickness bug so maybe I've got a mild form . Uh the 2ww eh!!

Multimum- welcome and many congratulations xx

Carrie- men eh!!!!

Well after going a and e yesterday with him banging his head (nasty bang ) he was only sick again in the night been a bit of a nightmare as he's had a tummy bug so think its def that but can't rule out that he hit his head yesterday either ... Anyway I've kept him off nursery and will ring GPS if any more sickness ..I've felt sick  for past few days not sure if got a mild form of Noah's bug :-/ but the sickness feeling started driving me mad !!


----------



## JanaH

Carrie - congrats on being PUPO - sorry you finding it hard with DH    
Juju   

AFM - looks like Joseph is going through a phase of nightmares, he woke up at 2 yesterday morning and this morning crying his heart out bless him. We had to put him in our bed to calm down so that we can all sleep. I need to try and work out what to do as I don't want him in my bed, was thinking of getting a single bed so that I can lay down with him in his room until he falls asleep.

I had a scan this morning and there is 15 good size follicles and quite a few smaller ones. Next scan is on Friday and ec is booked in for Wednesday morning.


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, it's not just hormones   he spent a load of money we don't have on a camera (even though he's already got a really expensive digital one) without even discussing it with me. This is after spending the weekend lecturing me about how we can't afford to have another child, how I have to go back to work full time, how we have to move into his parents' house (which is a dump) so we can live rent free....and on and on, and all the time he had already ordered the damn camera   I never spend anything without first talking to him, and he's gone and done this behind my back   

Jana, Zac went through a phase of nightmares too, fortunately it only lasted a few nights though. Hope it's the same with Joseph   Good news on the follies   

Amanda, sorry you're feeling sick, hope you feel better soon and hope Noah is OK too


----------



## amandaloo

Jana - great news about the follies best of luck for EC will be routing for you 

Carrie- thanks   sorry to hear your hubby is being a pain   . Mine always wants something at the moment is a Nissan Nevara and to say he's got no chance is an understatement !


----------



## juju81

Ah sorry Carrie   yeah that is rather naughty.  You should make him send it back  

Janah wow what a lovely crop of follies  

Amanda, oh dear, hope your not getting the bug   when are you due to test?

Can anyone help, I've just got my results back for my progesterone at 30.3.  She said they are spot on but that seems low to me?!?


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hun so sorry to hear that things are even more difficult at home          is this part of his depression? so tough, especially with you trying to relax and stay calm on the 2ww           

Jana way to go EC on Fri that is exciting - grow follies grow! we have a single bed for Joshi and he loves sleeping in it, and I love snuggling up to him if he asks me to when he is going to sleep   

Ju totally agree hang onto your PMA and stay away from the pee sticks until OTD if you can            just seen your post about progesterone - my clinic likes it to be over 100 when you are on progesterone support - that is way over what is actually necessary, they use it as precaution I think. Are you on any progesterone support? If not and you didn't DR then your body should produce exactly what is necessary for you as if you were getting pg naturally        

Amanda hope you are having a calm 2ww   

                    to all of you   

We are back in feb next year and will move back into our flat and kick out our tenants - and hit a big financial wall as I am going back to work in the uk 50%, we have to start paying our mortgage again instead of it being covered by rent, start paying for nursery for Joshi as no state ones near us with space, and pay for more tx- am going to live in lala expat land for a bit longer and try to save madly until then  

ltos of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Thanks ceci, no not on any support.  She sai it was spot on so just have to trust her.  Lala expat land made me laugh.  Your'll manage, we all do.  Are there no nurseries? What about ones attached to schools? 

Janah, Noah suffers night terrors.  Slightly different from nightmares.  How does he act? Noah's completely still asleep and they dot recommend you wake them, just have to let them get on with it and just make sure they are safe.


----------



## JanaH

Yesterday he got up and walked to his door and called us, this morning is was sitting on his bed. He was awake as he was talking to me. I really hope this is just a phase. My friends son suffered with night terrors from a young age and the doctors told her to keep a eye on the time he gets it and if it's the same time to make noise or gently wake him 10 mins before and that worked for them. Night terrors happens when they are in deep sleep and nightmare are in the light sleep phase


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju    have faith in the nurses. Thy know what thy are doing.    As I keep saying its a natural cycle. Your body s doing what it's meant to do. I had no bloods done for progesterone when I hd my ivfs. If the embryo wasn't progressing, your progesterone would be low. And it's NOT!! 


Carrie sorry your DH is giving you jip


----------



## carrie lou

I have two more blasts in the freezer     though hoping not to need them for a while!


Jana, that's exactly how Zac was with his nightmares, definitely wide awake and talking to us, that's why I don't think it was night terrors in our case. But like I say it only lasted a few nights so hopefully it's only a phase.   I think a single bed that you can lie with him in is a good idea, I do this sometimes with Zac and it works well. 


Ju, I have no idea what my progesterone level is, my clinic don't even test it. Just trust your body, it's done this before and knows what to do


----------



## ceci.bee

Yay Carrie that is fab news about the blasts. Do you know how your receipient got on??                                           for a lovely sticky BFP


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Ceci   No I don't know about my recipient, they won't tell me at this stage, but I can find out later if she has a pregnancy and/or live birth.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- great news about the blasts glad you had some to freeze   try to keep calm about dHyou don't want to be getting stressed today   


Ceci-hope you get sorted out when you get back here   it's always a struggle saving for tx isn't it   I'm sure you will get there   . 


Juju- no idea about progesterone levels they don't check at mine well they might do but they haven't checked me ? Are you feeling any better


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I wrote a big reply last night and my computer froze.  

Anyway - congats to Carrie - if an old bird like me can get pregnant from a day 6 blast that was frozen then I am sure you have a good chance with a day 5 fresh one at your age and a couple of back ups in the freezer!

Sorry about DH. I have similar problems with my DH buying cameras and gagets and then telling me he has no money to pay our bills. He contributes nothing financially. Are you sure there are no donor conception wobbles in his mind with the depression?
Reason why I say is that my DH is very depressed about it all and says it is eating him up. He is really much worse about self esteem and being snappy and horrid now I am pregnant again and is very jealous of the donor. Says I don't need him, all I need is the donor to leave a pot at the clinic and I fall pregnant. Which is true as I have had a 75% success rate with this donor in terms of getting pregnant. Anyway it is all too much for DH.

Juju - I get sore boobs after ovulation - the LH surge causes it. I have noticed the stark difference between IVF cycles and frozen embryo cycles. The progesterone support is exactly the same in every cycle, but I have had very sore boobs for 9-10 days after the HCG trigger shot. LH and HCG are almost identical chemically. The pain from the HCG trigger wears off after 10 days and that makes you worry. Then the same pain returns at about 7 weeks pregnant when HCG levels have built up again.

Good luck and try not to test early. As I said before, my clinic give an OTD of 17-18 days post E/C or ovulation.    

Jana - interesting that J was up crying all night. I had exactly the same with C last night out of the blue. I was really starting to worry that he had some horrible infection. At 2.20am he woke wimpering and crying. He was inconsolable and not waking up when I was trying to pick him up and comfort him. It went on for hours. He woke a bit and was saying ''it scratched me'' and ''get Daddy'' and ''help me''.   I took him to see Daddy and he calmed a little and went back to sleep. Then it all started again - crying wimpering, tossing and turning saying ''no'' and ''go away''. He was batting his ear and I worried he had an ear infection, but no temperature and no other symptoms apart from a runny nose for a couple of days. He also has not had any teeth come through for about 10 months and he only so far has 12 teeth, so there are 8 more to come through.
I sleep with C in a single bed so even me being there did not help this time. Really tired today. Me and him.

AFM Yesterday I had my 16 week appointment with the obstetrician. Initially the midwife could not find the heartbeat and I went into meltdown as this is what happened with Beanie - dead at 16 week appointment.    She found mine which was by now 126 per minute! and tried to tell me it was the baby, but I felt my pulse and it was the same. So she went looking again and found a heartbeat of 145 that was very steady and different to mine - thank goodness.   

Then the obstetician looked at my notes and discussed why I had a planned section last time and immediately said that he was perfectly happy with my history to support another planned section between 38-39 weeks.

I have also been booked for scans at 20, 28, 32 and 36 weeks to check the placenta is working properly at my age and appointments at the hospital clinic where I can see him personally if I want to a week after each scan. Work will love me!!!


----------



## juju81

Glad everything is ok holly, must have been frightening     re sore boobs, I always get them anyway, but not to the extent I have to out a bra back on! Sod waiting 17/18 days, 14 is long enough    Apart from clomid I've been completely natural, no trigger and no progesterone support.  That makes me worry more that ill get pregnant and then can't sustain it   


How's hubby?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Phew thank goodness they found the heartbeat    I had scans every 4 weeks and an appt with the con a week after each one with samuel.    


My friend had a sectionw ith her first and wanrted a natual with her 2nd, She was in labour and her uterus split      it was horrendous. They both nearly died. Thankfully all is ok. I didnt realise how dangerous a VBAC was. Apparently its not that rare.


----------



## carrie lou

Oh gosh Holly I can't imagine how scary it must've been when they couldn't find the heartbeat   but so glad everything turned out OK. And you get lots of scans for reassurance! Glad you got your c-section booked too, I know that was worrying you .   


Yes I think there may be deeper issues with DH but he won't talk about them. I'm not in the mood to talk to him anyway   I did actually meet his therapist today for the first time, to try and make her aware of the other problems he is facing, but she is concentrating on the PTSD from his accident and said if he needs any more help than that she will have to refer him on to someone else.   not hugely helpful.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yes VBAC is potentially life threatening for mother and baby and can result in hysterectomy so no chance of any more babies unless surrogacy.

I have looked after 2 women in ICU with ruptured uterus during VBAC. Both survived, but neither of them had a uterus or a baby to take home. One had been induced, which is not meant to be done for a VBAC as far as I can tell - so it goes to show it can be severely mismanaged and I do not want to risk it thanks very much. When the consultant heard I worked in ICU and had looked after such cases I think that was the deciding factor that he was not going to even try to change my mind.

I will still go to the information session, if I am free and see what they have to say, but I think in my heart my mind is set. I don't want the worry or risk.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

My friends baby didn't breathe for 5 mins.   he was swimming around her organs. She's lucky he didn't rupture one of them. She's still got her uterus but they've told her she'll never have anymore. 

I don't get why they allow vbac? It's terrible they allow this risk to mothers. 

I know a mother that is a doctor. I was telling her about it. She said of course it's going to happen. There is so much scar tissue with the strain of a baby trying to get out pulling the scar.


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- how frightening   . Thank goodness she found the heartbeat . Sounds like they are keeping a very good eye on you which must be very reassuring


----------



## MultiMum

*CarrieLou - *sorry to hear re DH. I know how frustrating they can be. We had a progesterone test at the clinic today to see if I can stop weaning off the drugs. I went to the loo and gave DP my purse to pay. He announced proudly that HE'D PAID!!!!!!!!! From his own money. He was chuffed all the way home. I said the right things but after all it's me that has paid for two entire rounds of IVF!!!!! I am still waiting for the contribution.........I am the breadwinner but it's all predicated on him contributing when he can. I think it's going to be a long wait. I don't mean to moan but it is tough to be a pregnant bank


----------



## juju81

Hmmm I went to rest my eyes at 3! I've just woken up


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## amandaloo

Juju - hope your feeling more positive now ))

Afm- still feeling sick and I was a bit dizzy today too .


----------



## JanaH

My biopsy results came back all clear, had another scan today and they can't see any further lumps. I'm so happy with the results.


----------



## carrie lou

Oh that's great Jana, you must be so relieved


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- great news   you must be very relieved


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Jana - I have been so worried about you - that is fandabbydosy news!


----------



## juju81

Urm, so I'm not due to test OTD until Sunday.  Just did another one,  and it said "pregnant 1-2wks"


----------



## carrie lou

JU!!!!!!!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - fantastic         so happy for you all . Hope I follow in your footsteps  


Modified !! -- forgive me I had just woken up when I wrote that and Jana and carrie


----------



## JanaH

Juju thats fantastic news


----------



## Lindz

Morning everyone
Jana- phew, that's such good news!

Ju- wow, congratulations. It all sounded so positive but nice to have it confirmed that your mind/bony isn't playing tricks. Clinic should pay you, you've really bumped up their stats! Wonder if they could really tell something from the scan when you had your prog done. They said something cryptic to me then too. I was negative at 11dpiui and a very very very faint line at 12

All those having tx- good luck. You're almost making me feel broody. Saw a friend's 3 day old yesterday. I forgot how tiny and yummy they are. DD held him and said she wanted one!


----------



## hakunamatata

Wow so nice to come on here to such good news. Janah that's fantastic hun what a relief, now you can cincentrate in treatment. 

Ju amazing go girly, you must be beaming, now don't start worrying, just enjoy x 

Off to the beach with friends today. Its hard keeping up with Addi after dislocated toe x 

Come on Amanda and Carrie you're next. X


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Juju - you naughty girl                     

Yippieeeee!


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah hun phew that is great news         

Ju YAY that is wonderful BFP! fabulous so happy for you and hope you are a bit calmer now


----------



## MultiMum

*Ju Ju - *super news. See you on the pregnancy boards


----------



## juju81

Multimum, nooooooo it scares me! I'll stay here I think  

Thanks girls, obviously very early days.  Am feeling positive though.  Need Amanda and Carrie to join me


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

We will all be pregnant together then - how exciting - lots of baby #2s!


----------



## carrie lou

I hope so


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah stay here in the warmth of our armpits   we'll look after you!


----------



## juju81

I'd rather not your pit minx, it f'ing stinks    


Holly, what is your due date?


Carrie/Amanda, are you as mental as I was and worked out your due date yet?


----------



## carrie lou

Yep   worked it out as soon as I got my tx plan.   It's actually the day after my mum's 60th birthday, I'm so hoping that's a good omen


----------



## juju81

And??  Mines 14th April.  My birthday is the 9th


----------



## carrie lou

16th April   my mum's birthday is the 15th


----------



## amandaloo

Jesus no hadn't worked it out but now I know it will be April    erm now ill have to work it out what date


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

12 th Jan. 

But consultant is talking about section between 38-39 weeks.
So that would be before the 5th Jan!

A new year baby.   

On that note, does anyone know when the January school term officially begins, because if I have the baby before the term starts I will get the 2 year old 15 hours nursery funding a term earlier. I know not a good way to choose the baby's birthday, but a financially practical one!

BTW they are apparently extending the 15 hours nursery funding to all 2 year olds from 2015 as opposed to 3 year olds as it is now with 2 year olds only for special needs families. I heard this from the nursery newsletter last week.


----------



## amandaloo

Is there an iui due date calculator


----------



## amandaloo

Think mine would be 19th April wishful thinking  


Sorry no don't know that info holly


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah I knew that holly. Samuel is 2 next April so he'll miss it


----------



## juju81

No idea holly! I imagine its after 3rd?

Amanda, there's an ovulation date! Crikey so we woul all be due within days of each other!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

It's probably the 6th cos that's a Monday.


----------



## amandaloo

Hi 

Well in now 6 dpiui and I still feel sick I couldn't face making a salad this morn looking in the cupboards/fridge was making me feel sick .. If my body is playing cruel tricks on me then its very cruel !!!


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie and jana how are you getting on?


----------



## carrie lou

Going completely  Amanda... I had a terrible headache this morning - is that good or bad or just a side effect of the cyclogest? I never had headaches with Zac. Then lots of cramps. Oh and I'm so so irritable - DH is lucky I haven't murdered him yet  Still 4 days until OTD, how am I going to make it  


Sorry to hear you're feeling sick, but I have my fingers crossed for you that it may be a good sign  


How is everyone else?  It's pouring with rain here, so hard keeping Zac entertained when he can't play in the garden - he is a real outdoors boy.


----------



## juju81

I'm about to murder nick.  And throw my phone in the road  

I started cyclogest today, I don't remember that giving me headaches.  Cramping, as you know, can be a really good sign.  4 days to go, pahhhhh, test tomorrow   . As soon as my test came back positive it was like a weight lifted and calm descended.  I even feel calm now, last time I was a wreck still paranoid I was going to miscarry


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - it's hard isn't it . Cyclogest made me feel sick quite a lot . Yes I got headaches on my ivf cycle mostly dregging 
Though cant remember if I did in my 2 ww but I defiantly remember feeling very irritable on both sets of FET that's why I didn't want any more drugs for a while as was even getting irritable with Noah it wasn't nice I didn't feel myself :-(( so totally understand what you mean .  I'm still feeling sick it doesn't go away at all . I'm beginning to think it might be a good sign now as if I had a mild bug from Noah wouldn't have had it since Monday ! Or it was mild I'd be over it by now.  Noah is better too ! I don't know it drives you round the twist . Googling a lot tried to ease off a bit today . Hope your ok xx


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- like the phah test tomorrow comment! Why are you going to murder nick?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie, I have a stinky headache today and don't want to take anything if I can help it. I think it is the thundery weather.


----------



## carrie lou

I really am losing it now girls... Lots of cramps this morning, 3 days until OTD. This is exactly how I felt at this stage of the 2ww with Zac. I really don't want to get my hopes up though just in case.   I've even had dreams about doing a pregnancy test (it was positive). Not to mention compulsive googling of everything to do with early pg symptoms etc. Should I just test tomorrow and get it over with?? But then I will have to go to work afterwards, whereas if I wait till Tues or Wed I have the day off to deal with the news (whether good or bad!)


Sorry for the me post, I'm going


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-   glad to hear your feeling exactly the same as before that's very positive   . How many days after et would it be if you test tomorrow?


----------



## juju81

Carrie, it all sounds promising.  Now you know I'm going to say test! If its negative (like mine last Tuesday was (!) ) then just stick you finger up at it and wait another couple of days.  I found my cramps weren't like AF cramps.  They were lower down!  

Just did my OTD test   cb digi pretty much came up straight away with pregnant (other day it took a good minute or so) so I'm hoping that means my levels are good  

I forgot how messy cyclogest were!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju -  sorry I missed your post must have done at same time


----------



## juju81

How you holding up Amanda? 

You know I totally sympathise with both of you and the flipping 2ww.  It's such an emotional roller coaster


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- I'm feeling exactly the same have nausea all day and yesterday we went into a chippy and I could hardly stand to sit in there . Both me and DH think its worked but still scared to dream too much ! It's still a bit early for me to test but I've been feeling like this since Monday so I'm wondering if had an early implanter and it may show up ? Oh I don't know it's driving me insane


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju - Errr 11 day wait!!  

Carrie do a test now  

Amanda TEST!


----------



## JanaH

Carrie I tested positive everytime 6dp5dt... Stay positive  


Juju so happy for you


Amanda all sounds positive  


Afm: the boys went camping yesterday so I had some lovely me time, watching movies and eating popcorn. I've got my last scan tomorrow, getting really scared know. My friend is coming in to theatre with me on Wednesday as DH needs to drop Joseph off at nursery which he starts at 8 and then he needs rush back to take the eggies over to Bridge as I'm scheduled for 7:30. I've got some big follicles and a few smaller one lacking behind and my lining was nearly 12 on Friday.


----------



## juju81

Amanda I think mine was an early inplanter, just because of how I felt, they can implant as early as 5days after   test test

Janah, good luck hun, mega exciting   

Mini, yeah ha ha! I feel like I've been preg forever already!! It's going to be on loooooooong pregnancy


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, tomorrow will be 7dp5dt. 2 days before OTD. Sounds promising for you - but I know what you mean about not wanting to dream. It's so unfair that we ladies can't allow ourselves to get excited   

Juju, thanks   

Jana, good luck for your scan, I'm sure it will all be fine  Are you allowed someone in theatre with you for EC? I wasn't, my mum could only come as far as the lift with me   

Cramps have eased off now. It's been like this for the last few days, cramps on and off. I don't even have any tests in the house, might venture out later to buy some


----------



## juju81

That what mine did.  I'm getting a lot of stretching pains and shooting pains in my foof now   and I'm so windy   although the curry last night probably isn't helping today!

Funny that before Noah we used to lie in bed until 12/1 at the wknd.  He stayed t nicks mums last night and I'm wide awake at 8.30! That's a lie in for me


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - your clinic give good otd mine was 12 days I think after 5 day transfer ! But anyway despite that I always tested early . I wouldn't like to tell you what to do but I know and I'm sure juju will tell you it's agonising if you get a negative if its too early but if you can stick your finger up at it and not believe it then do it !! I've not tests either in the house I ordered some off eBay other day so waiting for them to come through ;-) .


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- best of luck for tomorrow hope it all goes well     hope it's not long off ec


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Well what would you do - I am feeling a little upset and angry right now.

I had to work in the dispensary today - my Sunday rota on.

When we arrived there was ceiling tiles down and a lot of workmen's tools in one area of the disp. There was a copper pipe protruding with some tape round it. All seemed fine and we got on with the work.

About an hour in the pipe started squirting out a chemical at high pressure and showering the whole area around it with it. Some staff members moved in to mop it up thinking it was water with some paper towels and then got sprayed with it as it started pumping out again. It started smelling chemically and horrid and one of the staff had it all down the back of his neck and on an arm and said it felt oily. I went as far away as possible and phoned estates who sent someone over. I went to another office and carried on screening the paperwork, but I felt I had breathed in some of the fumes already. 

I phoned one of the pharmacy senior managers for advice at the time, but could not get hold of the key person.

I am pretty scared for the baby's health, not knowing what the chemical was. The workmen were really blase. Saying that they don't wear masks with it and it is just an oil they use to prime the system before putting in the gas for the air conditioning. But the staff who got it on his arm said it was all red and hot.

What do you think? I want the COSHH report for it and the risk in pregnancy at least.


----------



## carrie lou

Holly, i'd be anxious too. But if the workmen are allowed to handle it without protective stuff, it can't be too awful - though I realise that's easy for them to say, they aren't carrying a baby.  I think you have the right idea getting the COSHH report and perhaps you could speak to Occ Health as well. I don't know if it's any consolation but my mum worked with radioactive substances all through her pregnancy with me - apparently they didn't know any better in those days! (I was livid when she told me  ) And I haven't suffered any ill effects, not so far anyway. Hope you are OK 

I'm also angry but with my MIL  She and DH skype every Sunday afternoon so she can see Zac and do her insane baby talk to him, I stay out of the way cos it's like having a conference call with a lunatic  Anyway she is frequently late for these things and today just didn't appear at all. DH rang her and she'd gone out for a walk  She called back *an hour later* while we were in the middle of eating dinner and wanted to do it then - Um, no, you ridiculous woman, we do it when it suits us or not at all! Amazing how some people seem to have no memory whatsoever of what life is like with a toddler who gets bored and tired and hungry. Sorry for the rant


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly I shouldnt worry. If they can work with it without masks then I'm sure it's ok. If its oil then it's bound to be hot. 


Carrie have you tested yet?    Any news on fil?


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- I'm sure you will be ok   try not too worry  . There's no way the workmen would be able to work with it if it was poisonous surely health and safety would take that into consideration  . But if you want to make sure obtain the information so you can put your mind at ease  

Carrie- did you buy a test?


----------



## carrie lou

No still haven't tested   I will buy some today!


----------



## amandaloo

I'm hoping mine might come through post soon !


----------



## JanaH

All set for EC on Wednesday, last Cetrotide and trigger tonight. Eeeeeeeeeekkkkk I'm so nervous


Carrie and Amanda


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- oww exciting eh    . How many did they spot on your last scan ? X


----------



## JanaH

Amanda I had a scan this morning, there is 8 big follicles and about 10 that is at about 15/16mm just hope and pray they get to 18 for Wednesday (think some might) and then there is quite a lot at 10 to 13 which wont make it. Think if I did the long protocol there would have been more bigger once, but I'm happy with this. My lining is already 15mm and that is without the progesterone


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- that sounds really good          Hope it goes well


----------



## ceci.bee

Fab news Janah                    for some lovely juicy follies on EC

Carrie and Amanda                      for your respective OTDs

Ju how are you feeling? are you having an early scan? hope you are calmer and smiling now   

holly that sounds really dreadful. I hope that the chemicals are all relatively benign ones, it sounds like you got out of the way pdq which must be the right thing to do in your situation and hope your exposure was minimal.

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Wow Janah, what a bumper crop loads and loads o    for wednesday   

Carrie - TEST    

Amanda, how you feeling?  Test too   

Ceci, hope your all well in Africa, do they have a summer/winter or is it hot all year round?  Im alot calmer thanks, felt like a whole weight lifted once id tested.  I feel pregnant to which i think is helping.  I forgot how draining the tiredness is.  Hubby is being amazing though and when i get in from work or get in from being out he deals with Noah whilst I lie down


----------



## ceci.bee

Good news Ju pleased you are feeling good and calmer. It is 'winter' here right now, although the sort of winter where you don't need to wear a coat and can walk around in jeans and a cardie    not like snowy dark cold uk - it will get to the hot season soon in October - 40 degrees in the daytime quite normal so enjoying the cool weather while I can   . I will be sad to leave our friends, our staff, our amazingly child friendly life style but am feeling that it is time to get home and on with our lives, particularly TTC next year. 
Keeping everything                 for you guys


----------



## amandaloo

Juju and everyone !-  feeling negative today . I've got the runs had it a bit on Saturday night/morning  then nothing yesterday day then woke up and got it today too hubby also got it he's stayed off wrk . It made me question my sickness . Anyway pg tests came this afternoon through post I'm 9dpiui and it was BFN.   . I know it's too early in fact I'm even questioning wether my otd is actually on Saturday ? I feel stupid ppl must think I'm mad    but I still feel sick and not sure wether to believe the test . Decided now I won't test again for a few days . Oh dear what have I done !


----------



## juju81

Ceci, be your turn soon enough chick


Amanda    I tested neg last Tuesday at 9dpdiui...way to early


----------



## ceci.bee

Amanda it is too early and          - OTD should be around 14 days post surge or 13 days from IUI I think, but as you don't actually know what is going on inside and when sperm met egg then you may have to wait - eek - until your period is late to test..........keeping everything                  

Ju thanks hun      need to take a leaf from you on how you waited for this cycle   

            to all
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Thanks ladies  I know it was too early   . It was so tempting when they came through the post ! And I've figured with the help of juju that my otd is actually Saturday not Friday duh . Need to regain some positivity now


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, don't worry Hun it was too early to test. Hold out a few more days  


Ju, glad you are feeling pregnant! And good to hear Nick is being so supportive   


Ceci, your lifestyle does sound amazing but I can understand that feeling of wanting to come home   Won't be long now  


Jana, all sounding really good re your follies, lots of good luck for EC.   


Almost sure I'm pregnant now - feeling sick, stretching pains, crying at something i heard on the radio ... i just cant actually dare to believe that it might happen for me! I bought some tests - going to do it tomorrow for sure


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - owwww exciting best of luck for tomorrow sounds very positive xx


----------



## juju81

Carrie, just how I felt.  I felt so tired today I wanted to cry    You must come on ASAP tomorrow morning    just go and do it now dammit


----------



## carrie lou

Aren't you supposed to use morning wee?   Don't worry I'll probably be up at 5


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie - am sure you will be up at 5


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Ju - you are lucky to have Nick. I have managed all the way through this pregnancy and the debilitating nausea and tiredness with no help at all and lots of housework and toy tidying, going to work, childcare etc. Resting on the sofa always had to be on duty with eyes open.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie test now  



Thanking you


Mini x


----------



## hakunamatata

Carrie where are you it'd 7! praying you've just got caught up in excitement. 

Janah follies sound great good luck sweetie. X 

Poor holly don't know how you've done it x


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie -


----------



## JanaH

I've been checking since 5    carrie


----------



## juju81

Carrie where are youuuuuuuuuuu! How dare you keep us waiting!


----------



## Fizzypop

Lol, I may not post much these days but I'm still reading along and following x 

First thing I did this morn when I woke is check my phone for news! 

I'm so glad we've got another few pg and hope it continues xxxxxx
Xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Sorry to keep you waiting. Three different tests negative this morning.   I don't know what to think. Maybe it was too early to test? I really feel pregnant, sick and everything. 


To add insult to injury, DH is furious with me for testing too soon and stressing him out. He's locked himself in the bedroom and refusing to go to his therapy appointment this morning, says it's my fault he doesn't feel in the mood.


Our house is not a fun place to be today


----------



## juju81

Oh carrie     leve it a couple of day and test again on OTD.  When is OTD?


----------



## carrie lou

They didn't give me an OTD. Consultant just said to test after about 10 days, which would be Thurs.


----------



## Fizzypop

Yes agree with ju x 

And keep testing  it could be too early today x

Don't take what your dh is saying to heart, maybe it's the stress of tx that has affected him? Think someone else said it but when you are going thru it again it stirs up all sorts of emotions? Sounds as if he is upset that its a negative rather than u tested early? X


----------



## ceci.bee

Shame Carrie          I was told by CRMI to test in the blood 10 days after a blast transfer - as you need quite a high level of blood HCG to get into the urine to get a positive test, so 8 days post blast transfer you might be feeling the HCG but it is not enough to get into your wee yet - wait a couple of days and test again - you may need to wait for 12-14 days post transfer to get a good urine HCG. If you want I will fly home from Africa to    DH for not being supportive and adding additional stress to your day!           and still keeping


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- I think it might be too early testing    you are testing very early . Like I said to you before my clinic gave otd of 12 days after 5 day blast transfer and that's early . Plus because they gave me 12 days they also wouldn't just go off my urine sample they wanted bloods too as they had given me earlier otd . What day are you today  past transfer ?   honestly keep positive I really think its a tad bit early yet . Sorry to hear dh is being like that   hope you are ok xxxx


----------



## JanaH

carrie      my clinic says 16 days after egg collection


----------



## pippilongstockings

Carrie. Don't give up hope, test tomorrow and thursday (and don't tell DH!)   




I've missed so much during my holiday!! So exciting to see all these cycles, tests and pregnancies    Going back a few pages now to catch up. 


Juju - already said this on ** but CONGRATULATIONS!!


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you ladies, you are all fab   I am 8dp5dt today, so 13 days post EC. I know of some ladies who got a BFP this early so I guess I was hoping I would too. Well I've learned my lesson, no more early testing for me   I will leave it at least another couple of days.


DH has gone off to his appointment after all.   He had the nerve to tell me to stay off FF, but I burst into tears and told him you ladies are the only people in the world who actually know what I'm going through and how dare he make me feel guilty for seeking support  That put him straight


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-   glad you put hubby straight . On my ivf fresh cycle I tested positive 2 days before and on that cycle they gave me a 14 day otd . I honestly think its too early to tell   

Afm- trying to stay positive  still feel nausea today and did all yesterday . Back at wrk so at least distracted for next 4 days stop me googling


----------



## carrie lou

I emailed the clinic for advice and the nurses have just replied. She said they recommend testing 2 WEEKS after ET to be sure, so I've definitely tested too early. Just wish the consultant had told me that.  


I tested positive 13dpiui with Zac, just assumed I would test positive at the same stage this time. Is it different for IVF then, do IVF embryos implant later or something? Anyone know?  


Amanda, sorry you're still feeling sick.   I hope work keeps your mind off things for a bit.


----------



## *ALF*

Carrie - each pregnancy is different so try not to compare to Zachary's. Having said that just to add to the pot I tested negative at 13dpo with a super sensitive test, didn't test day 14, then tested positive with standard test on day 15 and I had two in there at the time. I was also experiencing pregnancy symptoms from 7dpo. There is still hope!


Juju - huge congrats!!!


Thinking of everyone else cycling at the mo xx


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - I'm hoping the nausea is a good sign  . Glad you have got it confirmed from clinic and hope its given you some reassurance  . How's dh now?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie I tested 14 days from EC and it was negative. But 2 days later it was positive.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

And that was a faint line so anything could happen In a few days.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie the concentration in the urine has to be high enough to show up. This can take several days after the HCG appears in the blood.

Also pregnancies widely vary. My tests have been 17-18 days post egg collection and been a really faint line with 1-2 weeks on the CBD tests, going up to 2-3 weeks after another 4 days.

In this pregnancy I had to go to A+E at 5+5 with bleeding. (OTD was 4+3 I think) They told me my HCG levels would not be up to 1000 yet and I would have to go back to have a recheck to see if things were progressing, but when my levels came back they were 4200! But working back my level was probably about 250 on OTD and that was a really faint line. I probably would have had a level of 30-50 in blood at your stage and it takes time to get into the urine. I have seen on here people who have had levels in the 1000s on OTD and others with a level of 150 on OTD and progress to normal pregnacies, so they all vary.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Mine was 117 16 days post ec


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks ladies. I'm going to hold off testing for a few days now, maybe wait till the weekend. I'm still having symptoms, have been feeling a bit sicky on and off all day, cramps, and that funny taste in my mouth. I really hope it's not my body playing tricks on me, that would just be too awful


----------



## JanaH

Eeeekkk so this is me off to hospital for egg collection, will report back when I'm home this afternoon.


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- best of luck


----------



## juju81

Good luck janah hun, thinking of you  

Carrie how are you today?

Amanda, how you feeling??


----------



## carrie lou

Best of luck Jana, will be thinking of you    


Amanda    


I'm OK, just trying to stay positive and not get too stressed


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - thanks same to you   

Juju- well you will be sick of me saying this now but I've still got nausea . Not sure what to think about it all just trying to think positive


----------



## JanaH

DH just send me a message... We've got 13 eggs, know for the important call tomorrow.

Carrie take it easy  

Amanda hope the sickness is a good sign.


----------



## ceci.bee

Yay Janah that is wonderful news                 for lots of lab love 

Carrie and Amanda      symptom spotting on the 2ww is pure torture keeping everything             for your OTDs


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, wonderful news well done   Hope you're feeling OK and fingers crossed for lots of fertilisation   


Ceci thanks honey


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- fantastic news ) best of luck for t/c tomorrow . Hope they get jiggy tonight.. Hope your feeling ok too after ec


----------



## juju81

Janah, have you heard how your embies are doing?

Amanda, how you holding up?

Carrie? Are you on anything? Surely no AF is a good sign?


----------



## JanaH

The lab called this morning 8 out 13 fertilised


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Excellent news!         for 8 embies


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- yayyyy         for your 8 embbies you must be pleased

Juju- I'm holding up .  went out last night for meal with friends couldn't face eating it all felt that sick made it worse as was eating late so longer I had to wait the worse it was . Felt sick from the moment I got up this morning I nearly threw up thinking about eating my breakfast . Fingers crossed eh  

Carrie- hope work has been a good distraction x


----------



## ceci.bee

woohoo Janah                      for a smooth transfer and I hope that your next baby is in that crop           

Carrie and Amanda                  for your OTDs ?tomorrow me thinks??

llots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci- thanks my otd is actually Saturday I worked it out wrong duhhh!


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, that's great news, hope you get some lovely embies out of that little lot   


Ceci, thanks Hun, I think I will test over the weekend which will be 17/18 days post EC.  


Amanda, sorry about the sickness, hope it's a good sign   


Ju, I'm on cyclogest twice a day, don't know if that can stop AF from coming?  


I've had no AF but today I've had some brown spotting   it's only very light and mainly when I wipe. I remember I had this with Zac just after I got my BFP... But it is so scary thinking it could turn to full on red blood at any moment and it will all be over   I emailed the nurses, they said to up the cyclogest to three times a day and see how I go


----------



## amandaloo

Hi

Bad news it's a BFN for me today used a clear blue digital too so that's 98 percent sure day before . I'm so peed off I've been feeling sick for so long now . I must have a bug   .


Carrie-     hang on in there


----------



## juju81

Oh Amanda    so sorry lovely


----------



## carrie lou

Oh Amanda sweetie I'm so sorry   Would it be worth testing again tomorrow to be doubly sure? Anyhow I'm sending you loads of     It's so unfair this process, and so very hard.   


I had more brown spotting overnight, and some cramps... This morning I've felt really sick and could barely touch my breakfast. I want to hope but am so scared of a disappointment, could it be my mind playing tricks on me?


----------



## juju81

Carrie I'm convinced you will get a proper result today   2ww feels like the 2yr wait


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Aww Amanda so sorry love.  

Carrie


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- I will test until I get my af I think but the tests don't lie so I know but I also want piece of mind too . My af usually comes about 29/30 days will that effect when I should have tested as im nor used to doing these natural cycles with no drugs..You haven't got long to go now hang on in there  .  . It's so hard to know what's going on with medication inside you progesterone can make you feel sick   but so can pregnancy it's a nightmare  . It's not over for you yet positive vibes all the way


----------



## ceci.bee

Amanda hun                 really sorry to hear about your BFN sweetie

Carrie - the progesterone should stop AF coming, esp if you are on 3 per day - on an IUI cycle if you are pg your body makes it naturally to support the pregnancy and maintain the lining of the womb - on a cycle when you don't get pg the body senses there is no pg as no HCG and drops the progesterone, the lining sheds and you have AF.  When you have IVF you downregulate so you switch off your bodies ability to make the hormones so you need progesterone supplements to maintain the lining and you will need them until about 8-10 weeks of pg when the placenta can make enough progesterone on its own. Keeping everything                              for you hun


----------



## amandaloo

Just been loo af has come ! Early! Typical eh


----------



## JanaH

So sorry Amanda    


Carrie


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

So sorry Amanda. I just wish all of us could say that we wanted to be pregnant and just press a button. This game is not easy.

The mind can play some awful tricks on us and wishful thinking can have psychosomatic effects. I hope you stop feeling terrible sickness now, as that is miserable. At least that is one thing that should feel better. If not then it might be a bug.

When a boyfriend left me and went to work in South Africa, when I was at the start of my career and definitely did not want to be pregnant, I was terrified that I was and felt violently sick (could not eat much, could not clean my teeth without retching) for 3 months. I eventually went to the doctors and she tested me and I was not pregnant (phew in that case) but strangely my sickness resolved in 24 hours!

Big hugs


----------



## JanaH

OMW my boobs are killing me... They are sore to touch and bra already feels too small, must be the triggershot.


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, I was the same after the trigger. It wore off after a few days though.


It's not looking good for me... Bleeding is getting heavier and just did another test which was negative again. I'm starting to lose hope. Just emailed clinic to find out what I should do.


----------



## ceci.bee

carrie I hope your clinic can do a beta that will tell you one way or the other for definite to put you out of your agony


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks Ceci. Clinic haven't replied yet. The thing is, my clinic is about 3 hours travel away and with a job and little boy to look after, I just can't justify going all that way for a blood test. Where else can I get a beta done? Don't fancy going to A&E the way I feel right now. GP maybe? But obviously won't happen over the weekend.


----------



## JanaH

Carrie how many days after egg collection are you today? They reckon you will have an accurate test 16 days after egg collection.


----------



## juju81

I'm so sorry for you both I truly am    xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Ju, today is 16 days post EC. 


Clinic have just replied saying not to assume anything but to re-test on Monday and keep using cyclogest until then. I don't want to cling on to false hope though, I already know what the result will be.   I've also booked an appointment with my GP on Tues for a blood test to confirm. 


I just want to know for sure then we can move on and go back for our frosties.


----------



## amandaloo

Yes you could ask gp carrie . When is 14 days after et? I'd most probably test tomorrow and see what result is   it takes a few hours to come back and you may not get the result back? Really sorry to hear you might think its over    . 

Holly- thanks for your reply 

Thanks ladies . Really thought it had worked gutted but will carry on this month start again


----------



## JanaH

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=288608.0

Someone posted this under the IVF topics


----------



## juju81

Carrie I obviously don't know what a negative feels likes   but I can understand how you probably want to wait until Monday but I think you know deep down hun.  How heavy is the bleeding? Do you think it's over?

Amanda, glad you've got a plan hun, are you doing IUi again? Could you go medicated?

Janah, when is OTD? I'm back up at the clinic the 19th, shame we've never bumped into each other


----------



## carrie lou

Monday will be two weeks since ET, that's why clinic are telling me to test then. Strangely the bleeding has slowed down now and even at its heaviest was never like a period. I just think if it was going to be a BFP I would have had a positive test by now. 


Amanda   I know now how rotten this feels so am truly sad for you. But I'm glad you have a plan B and hope it brings you better luck


----------



## JanaH

Juju haven't had transfer yet, but if we are lucky to transfer test date would be the 23rd Aug.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-    its awful getting a negative    . This is my third in a row . I think your clinic do right making sure its 14 days! . Like you say you know yourself but its torture having to wait to get it confirmed  Did you use a sensitive test?? 

Juju- thanks


----------



## carrie lou

I used a first response but it wasn't first morning wee, wonder if that makes a difference. All the same I would have expected to see at least a faint line by now surely?


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- it's a difficult one to answer because everyone is so different and its not your otd until Monday . Wouldn't want to give you false hope but I would keep testing for peace of mind


----------



## juju81

Carrie,    just carry on doing as the clinic say.  I would have thought a BFP would have come up by now BUT pippi had a lot of BFN's and then got a BFP


----------



## JanaH

Just had the call from the lab, transfer will happen on Monday. Out of the 8, 7 is at the 6 to 9 cell stage which they said is top quality and 1 is at 4 cells.


Carrie how are you doing


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hun so sorry you are going             on this 2ww              I know of so many women who have only tested positive on their OTD and had BFNs every day up to that day - including Mini I think so keeping everything                          for you - it aint over till auntie flo arrives after OTD

Amanda hun              better luck next cycle

Janah that is fab news good luck for ET                           

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## carrie lou

Good news Jana, best of luck for transfer on Monday   

Thank you for all your positivity ladies but sadly I don't think there can be any hope now... Bleeding is much heavier with clots (sorry for TMI). I will do as the clinic say though and test on Monday, just want it confirmed now so we can move on. I'm devastated though and struggling to understand why this has happened, it was a perfect embryo, it should have worked.    Keep thinking it must be my fault, maybe I did something wrong.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-   there's nothing you can do don't blame yourself  . I had 2 separate attempts with 2 perfect frozen  blasts and no luck it's heartbreaking    . The meds make you think you are pregnant and if you have never had an ivf cycle/fet before you don't experience it until it actually happens  .   . The way I see things if the clinics knew the last bit of how to get the blast to implant everyone would get pregnant . Some of it I feel is down to luck     . It makes you appreciate what you have too and how very lucky we are to have our perfect special little boys   . T


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- fantastic news will be thinking of you xx


----------



## juju81

Carrie hun   be kind to yourself.  Like Amanda said, a lot of this IF is down to luck.  Nothing you have done/didn't do would have changed the outcome.  Can you move on to FET straight away?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - you have done nothing wrong. Even with a 50 % success rate, which is pretty good odds, one woman will get pregnant and one won't in any given cycle with perfect conditions.

No one knows why a perfect blast will implant one time and not another. It could simply be down to the luck of it falling in a crevis in the womb lining that holds it there long enough for it to stick. Some might come out on the fluid and never have a chance.

In my cycle with C I had 2 blasts put back, but only he stuck. I have been lucky again with my frozen embie and you could be too.

So out of my 3 blasts 2 were lucky, sticky ones, and one was not. That is a 66% success rate out of 3 Blasts. If I had had the non sticky one put back the first time around on its own to avoid the risk of twins then I would have had a BFN.

You are still a good prognosis patient, however you look at it, and you should be really proud that you have helped another couple and have 2 more chances for yourself in the freezer. Plan B here you come......


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Ju and Holly, that is a really positive way to look at it. The clinic gave me a 67% chance of pregnancy with this blast which is 2 out of 3, I suppose I was the statistically unlucky one of the three. My lovely mum has just been to visit and has offered to pay for our FET cycle, so we will get on with that as soon as the clinic will let me. I hope to have both put back this time to maximise our chances.


Still feeling very sad about my little embie that didn't make it but ready to move on to plan B.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - thank goodness for lovely mums  . Hope you can do something nice in next few days to treat yourself xxxx


----------



## hakunamatata

Oh girls this treatment lark really isn't fair, our bodies can really trick us. I was convincef back in march I was pg which is why it hit me so hard. Good for you guys getting straight back to it.

I got af yest and providing next cycle is 28 days or more we are going again next month. I will jab on hol and have first scan when back. Bad timing to have af on hols really, so to be late would be better lol, but bet won't be. 

We are struggling with getting Addi to sleep now we are not soithing her, I'm sure we will get there x 

Hope everyone having a good weekend.


----------



## carrie lou

Sorry you' re having sleep issues Hak. Zac was the same for a while after I stopped BFing him (before that he would always fall asleep on the breast so was a big change for him). First I had to cuddle him to sleep but that was taking ages and he was really fighting it. Then we moved on to me lying down next to him while he dozed off. Nowadays I sit by the door while he falls asleep on his own in his bed. It has taken us a while to get there but means I haven't had to leave him on his own to cry which I really didn't want to do. And he falls asleep much quicker now, i think maybe having me lie so close to him was a distraction more than a comfort!!! I hope you find a solution, it can be so hard. And loads of good luck for when you start tx again, let's hope we can be cycle buddies if we go at about the same time.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Sorry to see your news carrie.   frosties usually have a good success rate. Keep your pecker up  

Hak glad to see you're cycling again. Have a nice holiday. Where are you going?


----------



## juju81

Pink cat I was thinking about you the other day. So sorry about your dad hun, must be unimaginable to lose a parent   good luck for the rest of the 2ww.  When is OTD?  I'm the same really, was adamant I didn't want anymore then last summer the yearning came back and it's taken nearly a year to get it all sorted.  I'm 5wks today, am keeping everything crossed everything goes ok this time too.


----------



## carrie lou

Pinkcat, lovely to hear from you again   I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad, must be very hard.   How exciting that you are also going for baby No. 2. I have heard of embryos being refrozen, so it does happen, but not sure how common it is. Lots of good luck for the rest of your 2ww. I hope to be following in your FET footsteps very soon


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hun masses of            BFNs are so tough and you are grieving for the fact you thought you were pg and are not and that makes it so hard. I totally agree with Holly - there is nothing you could have done - a 67% success rate is a great success rate, but meas that still 33% of women with that success rate would get a BFN. It is a human instinct to put ourselves in the success % in our heads it helps us get through it, even if we are given 10% you still think you will be in the 10% even though statistically we are more likely to be in the 90% IYKWIM. Thank goodness for your lovely mum who can help pay for the FET - I know lots of women who have had a fresh blast SET and got a BFN and had DET FET and had twins    babydreams and bluebottle just two of them (if you had three blasts with 67% and FET success rates are now the same as fresh, then the chances of at least one of your frozen blasts giving you a BFP is VERY high. so pleased you can get going and put this behind you soon      

Pinkcat so sorry tohear about your dad                   such a tough decision you had to make. I have heard of women having eggs frozen, then thawed and fertilised, then the embie frozen and then getting pg, so I don't see why two freeze thaw cycles should be too bad. Hopefully you won't need it, and you will get a lovely BFP this cycle           

Hak lovely to hear from you hun, so pleased you are going again and keeping everything              for you. Do you think Addi is picking up on stress about tx in the house, which is making her harder to settle at night? hopefully she will start sleeping better soon and you will have a BFP               

lots of love to all
CEci


----------



## amandaloo

Pinkcat- sorry to hear about your father    . And best of luck for your 2 ww   sounds like you had a hard decision to make on transfer day .   best of luck  

Carrie- hope you can get started again soon . Think my clinic wanted one natural cycle Before I started again but as we all know different clinics vary . Hope your ok  . 

Hak- good luck with starting tx     . 

Jana - how you doing? When is transfer day ?


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies

Carrie - thinking about you today  

Ceci- hope you are well   when are you coming back?

Jana- have you had your Et ?

Afm- pigged out all weekend to make myself feel better . Just notified the clinic that we will be going again this month . Looks like iui will be around 23rd August . I'm absolutely dreading the next 2 ww :-///


----------



## JanaH

Pinkcat - sorry about your father. Good luck for the rest of you 2ww  


Hak glad you are ready to cycle again   


Ceci hows Africa? We are going to Cape Town for Xmas


Carrie how are you doing?  


Amanda glad you are cycling again.


Afm we had our transfer today. We had 1 grade aa expanding blast and another 5aa blast transfered. They always just called to say they are freezing 3 embryos today and a possible 2 tomorrow. I'm supper excited this is by far the best quality we had. Now the wait begins...


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Great news Jana!

Best of luck Amanda!

I am hopping mad!!!!

My little boy was due an operation today. This has been months in the planning, booked for weeks after lots of to and fro from the booking office at the hospital and to my work to find a mutual day/ week when they had a list and I could get the time off. 

Someone at work is working different days this week to accommodate me being off. Been really difficult. I was really not looking forward to my little baby being put under a general anaesthetic and cut, and was awake a lot over the last week worrying.
Today came. Had to get C up at 6.45 as he was nil by mouth from 7. He had a little cereal and milk but was not that interested and still so sleepy. 

Told not on paediatric ward as building work. On day surgery instead and not geared up for children. Got there at 11 and then waited about 2 hours. Little one so thirsty, begging for drink and food. Real meltdown over the numbing cream on his hands. They had no bandages! He was tearing it off and screaming. I was physically wrestling with him. Awful and so stressful for such a little one. Everyone else on ward was older and able to reason with.

Then after all this they come and say he is cancelled as the anaesthetist that normally does the list is on holiday and the person covering is not competent to do 2 year olds.     

They knew he was coming. It is not as if they did not know his age. I am so angry. They had the head of nursing come over from another site and speak to me as I was so annoyed. Grrrrrrrrrrr!


----------



## ceci.bee

Holly so sorry about your terrible experience        especially as you are a member of staff as well        I hope that they bend over backwards to sort it out for C next time.

janah that is amazing news, really hope in that clutch your next baby is currently waiting and keeping everything             

Amanda and Carrie big    not surprised you are pigging out Amanda, completely normal! I have no advice about the next 2ww except that que sera sera nd you will get a BFP soon, this lark is a complete numbers game, and nearly everyone gets there one way or another  - you have normal fertility, you have a great donor with whose sperm you and DH already have one BFP, so the chances of another are high, just keep the faith

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Janah, mega excited for you hun    do you have transfer at SO? When is OTD.  Have a good feeling about this   


Holly, OMFG I can't believe they did that. And with such a young un.  It's bad enough when an adults op has been cancelled and they are starving let alone a 2yr old who doesn't understand why he's being starved.  What's the op for if you don't mind me asking?  How you doing? Are you finding out the flavour if this one?


Carrie hope you ok.  Did you officially test today?   


I tested again today, panicking that I'm not pregnant anymore and it was spot on at "pregnant 2-3". I was a bit weary about testing again actually as when I did another test with Noah it never moved up by weeks and sent me into a blind panic so I was really pleased to see that.  Less then a week until my scan


----------



## JanaH

Juju the transfer is at Bridge Center, clinics test date is the 23rd Aug and Bridge is the 21st, but I will start on Sunday as I'm very impatient.


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, that's wonderful news, good luck    


Ju, glad the test reassured you   


Amanda   


Holly, I'm appalled you and Charley were treated that way   there's just no excuse for messing a two year old around like that!!! Are you going to make a proper complaint? I think I would   


AFM, well I did another test this morning, it was almost like torture knowing for certain it would be negative and indeed it was   but I got straight on to the clinic and have an appointment on Wed to discuss FET. I've heard people say having a plan b helps them get over a BFN and now I can see how true that is, I feel much more positive for having a plan of action.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie I always had a plan b and a c    

OMG holly. That's disgusting of the hospital. Hope charley is ok. What's the op for ?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie glad you have got on with plan B. It does really help to have one. I have always had a plan B when starting any cycle. My BFN really did hit me hard after my miscarriage. I felt like I would never have a baby. I think it would not be as hard now I have C, but still hard.     

Juju - glad it seems to be progressing well. It really is amazing how lucky you have been with your BFPs with IUI.  

The operation was to remove a dead testicle. Bit ironic given his conception method. But unfortunately when his testicle was descending whilst still in the womb, it twisted on its blood supply and died. It is called torsion neonatorum. His other one is completely normal and the plan was to fix that at the same time so it could not torsion in the future, to ensure his fertility and hormone production is preserved.
The problem if you leave it is they have found there is a very high risk of testicular cancer in the little bit that is left when he is a teenager, so it has to come out to remove that risk. Sad, but one of those things.  

I am still really angry. 

Other little one is hopefully OK. I have my 21 week scan at the beginning of September and I hope to find out if   or


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Aww poor charley


----------



## juju81

I know, I do realise how lucky I am   


Oh my, I've never heard of that.  Was it picked up at birth or 6wk scan? It's not nice for either of you    is DH being supportive?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

They thought it might be an undescended testicle at birth, but at 8 week check GP said it was not right and sent us to paediatric surgeon. He said it was not totally uncommon. He sent us for an ultrasound anyway to look for the testicle in the abdomen, but as there was a pea sized lump there, he suspected the diagnosis all along.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I doubt they could see it at 6 wk scan ju!


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## amandaloo

Jana- brilliant news    hope they froze the rest of them today too ?

Holly- what a horrendous experience for you both  . Sorry to hear about it all . I hope they get their act together for his next surgery appointment   

Carrie - when's your appointment ?

Mightymini -


♥ Mighty Mini ♥ said:


> I doubt they could see it at 6 wk scan ju!


 lol


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, hope you have some frosties today?   


Amanda, my appointment has been moved to Thurs. I have chatted to other ladies on my clinic thread and some of them were allowed to go straight on to FET after a failed cycle, so hopefully I will be too   How are you doing ?  


Holly, my DH had bilateral undescended testicles as a baby but thanks to his   useless parents, nobody noticed or cared enough to do anything about them until he was 7 by which time it was too late - it could well be the reason he is azoospermic now (though no one could give a definite answer). I'm glad they correct these things at an earlier age now. I hope your next hospital experience with Charley is a lot better


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## amandaloo

Carrie- hope you can start soon then sounds positive if your clinic thread said can go straight away fingers crossed for you   . I'm disappointed but ok . I'm getting worried that ill never see a bfp again after 3 failed go's but hoping and praying that will get one soon. It's hard to keep positive but got to try . I can't do anymore than I'm doing . I'm keeping healthy (bar the pig out at weekend!) I'm not drinking alcohol . I'm eating healthy . I lost weight for it just not sure what else I can do but  pray For luck ..Good luck for your appointment Thursday . I'm sure you will get your bfp this time


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## juju81

*finger* minx! U know I meant 6 week check   

Carri good luck for Thursday


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## carrie lou

Amanda, I know it is so hard and I have those moments of doubt myself sometimes. But you have been pregnant before and you will be again, you have to believe that. This fertility treatment lark is so much to do with luck. If you are determined and keep trying you WILL be lucky eventually, let's hope it is sooner rather than later for both of us. Stay strong


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## juju81

Amanda & Carrie,  I have wry faith it will work
For you both   

Amanda, could u try a medicated IUI?


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## amandaloo

Carrie- thanks  

Juju- there was only 1 percent difference In pg with medicated . There's too much too in and fro in to Leeds involved too for scans . I literally can't do it . Its an hour and 20 mins away..I Work full time and already find it hard swapping about shifts Etc. I just didn't think it was worth the hassle for an extra 1 percent success rate. The consultant didn't think so either when we spoke to him.. Do you know with all the treatment I've had including Noah's Ivf cycle I haven't had any unplanned time off work . Always managed to swap or take some annual leave guessing when the treatment would be . That's some going I reckon!! Oh and I wanted a rest from drugs too that's another reason I didn't want medicated....Am I making a mistake ??


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## juju81

No not a mistake, I didn't realise there wasn't much between unmed and medicated.  It is a pain, our clinic is 1.20/30 away too   I'm sick of the drive.  Said 4yrs ago after our 8wk scan "thank god we don't have to do that journey again   . Tht is some good going, my work gave me 10 days and I alternated and only used one day because I don't work tues/weds some of the appointments fell on those days nd my tx was actually a Sunday! I'm only on medicated because of my AMH and prog levels!!


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## amandaloo

Juju- my works didn't give me Any days for it . But I was told last month I can have 5 days off with Ivf but they haven't said anything about any other tx . Anyway I've told them I might need a day this time round (for treatment I've said it's not Ivf )and they won't class it as sick .  Well not sure what other clinics percentages are but at mine they are really good it's been 25 percent unmediated and 26 medicated . That's high compared to national average or so I believe .


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## juju81

I'm no sure what my clinic is. I know when I had tx for Noah it was 36% which is why I chose to travel to them.

I've got a funny tummy.  Not sure if its anything sinister, because I need a poo (!) or because I'm hungry.


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## carrie lou

I've had to use annual leave for all my treatment and have just taken another day for my appointment on Thurs. At this rate I'll run out of leave before I get pregnant   


Have been trying to remember the success rates for DIUI at my old clinic... I think it was about 20% for natural and 25% or medicated. Not sure how they class a clomid cycle though as that's what I had


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## juju81

That's classed as medicated carrie.  Could you not take a few sickies?


----------



## carrie lou

Bit difficult - my boss knows I was having IVF so she may well realise what I'm up to. Also don't want to get in trouble for being off sick too much.   I only work 2.5 days a week though so if I'm lucky some of my appointments will fall on my days off.


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi  

I've not posted in a very long time   but I still try to read occasionally. Lots going on on here. I'm pleased to see Mistletoe and Juju have BFPs - delighted for you. Sorry for your recent BFNs Amanda and Carrie - it's not fair  . Wishing you both loads of luck for success on your next cycles. 

My daughter is one next week   . She is brilliant - has just started walking (or trying her best to run!) and is a little rascal but a very cute one. We too are about to start on the journey for baby number two and I am probably going to have IUI the first week of September, so I thought I would pop back and say hello as it seems like I may have some cycle / bump (  ) buddies. I'm slightly freaking out about the fact that I could potentially have another baby as early as May / June but of course the chances are that it will take a good while longer and a big part of me just wants to get fertility treatment done and dusted so we can move on with our lives and know where we stand financially etc. 

xx


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## carrie lou

Wow, abcd, great to hear from you - I was only thinking of you the other day and wondering how you were getting on! Can't believe your baby is one already   Wishing you lots of good luck for baby number two


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## amandaloo

Abcde- lovely to hear from you . Time goes too fast eh . Good to hear your starting again for number 2 )  

Jana- how are you getting on ? Did they freeze any more for you  ?

I'm so proud of Noah he's been doing the majority of his poo's on the toilet recently   just need to get there with the wee's now . He does some wee's on the toilet but not fully there yet ..


----------



## juju81

Well done Amanda, Noah mastered the wee's but not the poos.  He was doing it for attention tho so I took a train away each time he poo'd his pants an after taking 2/3 away he stopped pooing.  I knew he knew what he was doing because he laughed everytime he poo'd his pants


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## JanaH

Carrie hope you get all your questions answered at you appt tomorrow.    


Amanda glad Noah is using the toilet, I'm struggling with Joseph he did ask to go to the toilet last night but just plays on it his yet to do a number 2.


In the end we only had three embryos to freeze but I'm happy with that. I've been relaxing at home whilst Joseph is at nursery. I have him tomorrow and I'm thinking of taking him to a friend on Friday. I tested this morning to make sure the trigger is out and it is, so when I test it will be a true result. Boobs are still killing me but the nurse said yesterday it the crinone I'm using.


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah 3 frozen is fabulous and keeping everything                 

ABC lovely to hear from you and happy birthday to your little girl  such a fabulous milestone and good luck with more tx

Amanda that is great you are getting both going - Joshi is still a bit hit and miss with the wees, but no poo success yet - I think it will take quite a bit of time

Carrie hope the apt goes well

Holly hope that you are a bit calmer now, and that the hospital gets its bum in gear to sort C out properly

AFM I have just posted some pics of our life and hols here in Africa on our blog if you want to check them out www.gavemandjoshi.blogspot.com janah you are so lucky to have xmas in CT, one of my favourite places.

llots of love to all
Ceci 

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that 
fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## juju81

Ceci I've said it before but what an experience for you all.  What a lovely way for Joshi to spend his first few years of life.  Do you think he'll remember any of it?  Just think, you can count down to your return and treatment through my pregnancy


----------



## carrie lou

Wow Ceci, what fabulous photos - I especially love the one of Joshi balancing things on his head, hilarious   


Jana, yay three frosties is wonderful news    


Amanda, that's great Noah is using the toilet. Zac is not in the least interested   but I suppose they all get there in their own time!


----------



## ceci.bee

Thanks guys - I don't think he will remember much, but I hope that the experience of growing up in the sunshine surrounded by so much outdoors space will help his brain development and how he processes information - he certainly loves to explore. The blog is going to be turned into a book for him to read to learn about his early life here, and for us all to share the memories. Ju your baby will hopefully be born as we are going for more tx next year - we are back in feb and hope to start around easter time if we can with money/work/my PhD etc


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci- omg absolutely beautiful pictures . What a wonderful lifestyle you all have   . So different to mine I'm very jealous ) 

Juju- wow your clinic has better results on iui than mine does FET ! 

Carrie - I've been sitting Noah on his toilet seat for months now its been a long process but I wanted to do it slowly So just sat him on once a day then over the months increased it . some weeks he wouldnt go on totally refused and wouldn't do a thing .To be honest I can't see when I would have time to toilet train him in one go unless I was on holiday for two weeks   . Anyway it looks like its slowly paying off .. Good luck for your appointment tomorrow x

Jana- 3 frozen embbies is great ) . Anyway your not going to be using them as this one will hopefully work


----------



## ceci.bee

Thanks Amanda - the pictures don't tell the full story of trying to cook dinner and change nappies in endless powercuts, running out of water in the tap and having to do the washing up outside in a bucket with water from the borehole, the threat of political unrest and a ridiculously out of control enconomy, and being surrounded by desperate poverty most of the time - not quite so photogenic   but all part and parcel of living life out here.
I like your slowly but surely sitting on the toilet seat idea - we are trying to do the same thing with Joshi and it is slowly slowly, but I have to keep telling myself that a) they are actually still pretty little, and b) every child gets there in the end one way or another, so am trying not to stress about it.

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci- yes as long as you don't get frustrated or stressed with it it's not too bad  . I didn't make a fuss if he wouldn't sit on there either . I never gave all that a second thought when I looked at your pictures   ! I suppose there are downfalls to living anywhere


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## juju81

Amanda I tried with Noah and got no where so gave up.  I then decided to just try after the new year, constantly said to him do u need a wee, stayed in one day and then made sure we went out as normal again constantly asking him and he got it just like that.  

Sometimes waiting that while longer makes it that little bit easier.  I never believed that at the time and was pressuring myself to do it.  They are only just  2 don't forget and boy do take longer.  It's not worth stressing yoursel out about it.  They will do it when they are ready......remind me of tho again in 3yrs time


----------



## JanaH

Congrats Pinkcat    when did you have your transfer?


----------



## amandaloo

Pinkcat - wow congratulations       brilliant news ))


----------



## juju81

Pink cat whooooooo hoooooo.  4 days early, the same as me  

I tested again today and got a 3+


----------



## juju81

How do they calculate OTD with FET? Just 2 wks from et? Or do they deduct the couple of days before etc?

I have my scan Monday


----------



## carrie lou

Congrats Pinkcat, wonderful news   This gives me hope!!!

Ju, good luck for your scan   

Saw consultant today, he said the reason IVF didn't work is almost certainly a problem with the embryo that meant it couldn't implant, nothing I did or didn't do would have made a difference, it was just bad luck. I needed to hear him say that! He was lovely and fitted me in for a cheeky scan while I was there so that I can do FET this month (a natural cycle). I'm going back for a scan next Wed, all being well I will do trigger injection soon after and have ET a week later.   Only question is whether to have one or two put back; he was trying to sway me towards one at a time but I feel quite strongly I want them both put back. He said ultimately its my choice, so we will have to give it some thought


----------



## juju81

Fab news Carrie, and I'm glad he put your mind at rest.  I'm praying both you and Amanda get a BFP


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Congrats Pinkcat     


Carrie - sounds like a plan! I'd be tempted by 2!   


Ju - with FET you count at how many days it was frozen at, so day 2 embryo would be EC 2 days prior etc etc Do you get me?


----------



## juju81

So if it would have been  a 3day transfer you already knock 3 days off your 2ww just like a fresh cycle?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

yeah


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- great news about being able to start again this month   . Glad to hear your reassured by what the consultant said . It's a hard one that choice . My last choice I had a very good grade blastocyst left and one that was a little behind . So because of that reason We put two back .As i didn't think there was much point saving the one that was behind for another chance..What are the embbies like you have left that might help make up your mind ? 

Juju - thanks


----------



## carrie lou

Ooh, my frozen embies are day 6 so that makes my 2ww even shorter   but I'm going to be a good girl this time and not test early   


Amanda, my two embies are both 5bb's which is apparently pretty good. But then again the one I had put back 2 weeks ago was also a 5bb and didn't stick  . My mum has just complicated things by scaring me with the risks of a twin pregnancy etc. She even offered to pay for a second FET cycle if we have one put back and it doesn't work. I really don't know what to do now. Good thing I've got a while to think about it. Anyway how are you doing honey? Sorry I can't remember, are you going for IUI again this month?


----------



## juju81

Carrie I can see why you want 2 back BUT if it doesn't increase your chance of a BFP but it does of twins I'd say just have one.  Is FET expensive.

I'm terrified I'm carrying twins.  I keep trying to put it to the back of my mind.  I'd get on with it because I'd have to but I'd much prefer one healthy strong embie ticked safely in there!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## JanaH

Carrie glad your appointment went well and that you can do FET this month. As for how many it's a personal choice. 


Juju not long until your scan.


Amanda how are you doing?


I'm trying not to symptom spot, but I was really dizzy today with hot flushes amd had some cramps and pulling last night. Just hope and pray it works as I will be devasted to waste so much money.


----------



## Lindz

Didn't you have 3 follicles Ju Ju?!


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - don't buy any tests in  .. Hmmm if they are that good I'd have one at a time but I'd like to have another chance with another very good blast . You won't need another chance though of course    . Yes I'm doing another this month looks like iui will be towards end of next week .


Jana - really hope it works for you be nice to see another bfp ) . I'm ok trying to focus on this month now . So hard doing 2 ww though eekkk . Hang on in there


----------



## juju81




----------



## abcdefgh

Just a quick one...

Thanks for the welcomes back! I need to make an effort to keep up and post more regularly... I'm going on holiday tomorrow for 12 days but will come back after that.

Congrats Pinkcat!  

Good luck Amanda and Carrie with your next goes - glad you don't have too long to wait to get started again.   

Good luck for OTD Jana!   

Hope you're feeling well Juju. Good luck for your scan. x

Hello Ceci, Lindz, Mighty Mini and everyone else. xx


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- when are you testing ?


----------



## juju81

Janah, wasn't it today your testing??


----------



## carrie lou

Thinking of you Jana


----------



## JanaH

Hi official test date is not until Friday, clinic wants you to test 16 days after e/c. I did do a test this morning I'm 6dp5dt and it was negative. Feeling very deflated to say the least, and I know it is really early to test. I've had some period type pains since Thursday and my nipples are super sensitive, just don't know what to think. I'm suppose to go back to work on Wednesday but will call my boss tomorrow to ask if I can take the day as annual leave, just can't face work at the moment. 


Hope everyone else is doing well.


----------



## juju81

Janah your bfn today means nothing. I've tested negative at day 11    leave it a few more days hun, keep up that


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, it's still too early sweetie, I know how gutting it feels to see that negative test, but try to stay positive   Plenty of people have got a BFN followed a few days later by BFP. Stay strong, I'll have my fingers crossed for you


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I got a negative 2 days before my otd


----------



## amandaloo

Jana - I've seen this about the internet a few times when searching about 


5-DAY TRANSFER: 

-1dpt ..embryo is growing and developing 
0dpt... Embryo is now a blastocyst 
1dpt....Blastocyst hatches out of shell on this day 
2dpt.. Blastocyst attaches to a site on the uterine lining 
3dpt.. Implantation begins,as the blastocyst begins to bury in the lining 
4dpt.. Implantation process continues and morula buries deeper in the lining 
5dpt.. Morula is completely inmplanted in the lining and has placenta cells & 
fetal cells 
6dpt...Placenta cells begin to secret HCG in the blood 
7dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops 
8dpt...More HCG is produced as fetus develops 
9dpt...HCG levels are now high enough to be immediately detected on  hcg

Looking at this you wouldn't get a positive result today


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- good luck for tomorrow


----------



## JanaH

TMI I've just been to the loo and when I wiped there was some brownish colour mixed in with the crinone gel discharged. Could this be implatation or the start of my period. Period is not due until Thursday/Friday. I'm totally freaked out. 


Juju good luck for tomorrows scan.


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, I had the same thing but it was later on in the 2ww. It is scary isn't it   It seems very early to be your period especially if you are on progesterone support which will stop it from coming. If it doesn't turn bright red and heavy, it could be a good sign - I have everything crossed for you    


Juju, good luck


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah hun sounds pretty encouraging for implantation around the right time but know how scary anything is.                  for a lovely sticky BFP on OTD


----------



## juju81

Janah, could be implantation   I know the crinone can also cause this.  I doubt it your period coming  

Thanks girls, am nervous already


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Implantation blleed, or old blood from EC or ............... twins!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Lots of people complain of a brown discharge with crinone. I think it sticks to the cervix and causes a bit of irritation.

I had an implantation bleed with this pregnancy when the embryo was 12 days old. I was spotting bright small amounts of red for about 3 hours one afternoon which then turned brown and stopped. I then had a much bigger bleed at 5 weeks and 5 days which soaked my PJs at night. And more spotting at 6+2 - I was not as worried at that one as the nurse said she could see a line of blood around the sac at the 5+5 scan and said I could expect a bit more spotting.


----------



## hakunamatata

Fingers crossed janah x x 

Ju good luck sweetie.


----------



## amandaloo

Jana-   hoping its a good sign for you .


----------



## JanaH

Thanks for all the replies.


I did not test first thing this morning, but did after I dropped Joseph off at nursery and by then I must have been at the toilet at least 7 times as I need to constantly go. And.....there was a very faint second line.


Ju what time is your scan?


----------



## amandaloo

Jana -    that's good news isn't it  . It must be a bfp then?


----------



## juju81

Fab news janah  

One healthy little heart beat beating away.  Measuring spot on, actually a few days ahead at 6+3.  Can't actually believe I've been so lucky  

Sending out bucket loads of baby dust to u all


----------



## JanaH

Great news juju


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- lovely news


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

JanaH  

Ju


----------



## carrie lou

Lots of good news today   Congrats Pinkcat, Juju and Jana     


Please let it be my turn soon...  I have a scan on Wed to see how things are progressing, hopefully can take trigger shot soon after and ET will be next week


----------



## juju81

Congrats Pinkcat.  Wow 4 wks crikey  

Carrie, it will hun


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Wow - wonderful news on here today. Juju   Pinkcat     JanaH - very promising    

Carrie   

AFM - DH had an accident at the weekend. I did not even know he was going away for the weekend. Just came back to an empty house on Sat after seeing Dad. He has fallen off his bike on the Isle of Wight and ripped his collar bone ligaments. Went to fracture clinic today there, but not heard from him. Wonder if it needs surgery? Not sure how he will get back as he is over there with his 4x4. As he is self employed in a physical job and he can't work or drive now for the next few months it is going to be even more horrendous than it already was. He wasn't contributing to the bills at all, but at least he had money he was keeping to himself, a car and a job to keep him occupied. I am not looking forward to this at all. Grrrrrr


----------



## juju81

Holly, hun, do yourself a favour and kick him to the kerb.  I can believe he provides nothing for his children. Letting you pay ALL the bills is NOT providing for his children.  Makes me mad.  Why do you let him get away with it hun   . When is your anomaly scan? Can't be long. Can't wait to hear what you have. Do you have any incling?


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - good luck for wed hope its your turn too soon 

Pinkcat- )) congrats 

Holly- oh my goodness  . Why did he go without telling you that's not on   especially when your paying for everything . I think that's taking the mick! Hope your ok  . It must be frustrating for you . 

Afm- started testing for ovulation today . Is there anything anybody can think of that I can do to increase my chances or help??


----------



## juju81

Hot water bottle to make a nice juicy egg?  When you surge, when are you going in?


----------



## Fizzypop

Wow Jana, keeping everything crossed. And huge congrats pink cat. 

All this cycling is getting me thinking about going again... 

Amanda - lots of positive thoughts hun xxx

Holly - completely agree with ju. How is he going to get home if he can't drive? Sounds like he is taking advantage of your good nature, if he's not contributing then surely it will be easier without him? And to go without saying anything, that's just ridiculous!


----------



## amandaloo

So I put a hot water bottle on when I surge? How often can I do that ? Do you mean as much as I can for two days? I know when I had ivf I drank pineapple juice not from concentrate and had Brazil nuts and some tuna . Not sure if that would help with iui ? I don't know when it will be guessing thurs fri sat or sun?


----------



## juju81

Yeah the run up to ovulation.  I forget your not doing medicated! However it will make your follie nice and juicy


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, I was told drink plenty of water, because your follicles are filled with fluid, staying well hydrated means they can take in plenty of fluid and get nice and big.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Amanda - you want a nice juicy lining and a fat perfectly formed healthy egg, so good nutrition is just as important for IUI.

Yes, I agree with you all. I would like it all to be solved. I hate living under this cloud. But I really really hate the fact that he can take half of everything that I have worked so damned hard for to provide a nest for my children - I have always worked (even o levels and a levels) to make a secure nest for my children (which made the IF so much harder as I felt I was feathering a nest for nothing - not so now). He has nothing to contribute, but will take half of what I worked the last 25 years to provide. And it was meant to be for my children.   But I am conscious that the longer it is left the worse it will get and if anything happens to my Dad, he will also be lining his pockets with half of that my mum and dad scrimped and saved to provide for me and their grandchildren. It feels so impossible and costly.


----------



## juju81

Holly can he take half when you are primary carer and have the children? Can you prove he's not paid a damn thing? I feel for you I really do.  I'm surprised you've never battered him one    maybe you should accidental on purpose bump into his arm   is he anymore invloved in this pregnancy?


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- he can't necessarily take half especially with you being the mother and you will most probably have your children more. I'd go and talk to a solicitor see what would Happen . It can't harm to speak to one then you would know where you stood.    . Don't think it's always as cut and dry as half each when children are involved. You only live once and you should be happy


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I told him the 20 week scan was on the 2nd Sep and he said ''that's nice for you'' under his breath. I don't even get that sort of response from strangers on the train who get chatting. I really don't want to leave C with him at all. You hear such nasty stories, especially just of late.


----------



## amandaloo

Holly-    go to a solicitor  . Do it while he's away  . Sometimes it's not worth stopping together for money you can build some up again


----------



## juju81

Holly if you got out sooner rather then later and started the ball rolling to get him out your life ASAP then surely he won't be able to touch your inheritance     no one deserves to live like that


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly get out now. You deserve a happy life with your children. Plus they deserve a nice life away from bad behaviour. If you stay they will think that his behaviour is normal and thats how you treat your wife.      do it for them, if nothing else


----------



## carrie lou

Holly my heart goes out to you, must be awful living with a man like that. But I think the others are right, if you have custody of the children surely he won't be entitled to half of everything. And the sooner you get him out of your life, the less likely he is to have any claim on your inheritance. Maybe you should talk to a solicitor, at least you would have seem idea of what is likely to happen. I know it's a bit step and it must be daunting     but you can't carry on like this.


----------



## Fizzypop

Holly it sounds like you need to talk to a solicitor to get advice, I don't see how he can walk away with half, especially if you can prove he hasn't contributed either financially or emotionally x


----------



## amandaloo

Currently led in bed with a hot water bottle and a pint of water   the things you have to do ! Ds at nursery today he's moving to pre school class in two weeks heck !!

Jana- are you going to test every day now?

Holly- hope your ok


----------



## JanaH

Amanda it's funny what we all do. 


Holly hope you manage to sort something out, you and LO deserve so much more.  


Carrie hope all is good with tomorrows scan   


I've tested again and it is still positive, tomorrow is my test date for the Bridge Center. Since yesterday I've been feeling really nauseas, is it not too early.


----------



## juju81

Fab news janah, a positive is a positive.  What day are you?


----------



## JanaH

Ju 4 weeks tomorrow


----------



## juju81

So 13dpec?


----------



## JanaH

Yes 13dpec


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- no I don't think it's too early . I tested 2 days before otd with Noah and was positive  . You have a BFP  its brilliant news very pleased for you xx


----------



## JanaH

I meant the sickness is it not to early. We are very happy with the positive test, just worried about another chemical.


----------



## amandaloo

The sickness could be the medication your taking . I know on all my ivf and fet cycles I felt sick


----------



## carrie lou

I felt really sick on my IVF cycle, think it was the cyclogest


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

i think at this stage a chem wouldbt show up on a test strip. I'm pretty sure that its a nice strong one there to be showing up so soon!


----------



## juju81

What is a chem preg?


How many blasts? Could be twins and that's why you feel sick    I felt nausea from day one.


I can't stop eating    put on 1.5lbs


----------



## amandaloo

Cyclogest- does make you feel sick without a doubt . 

Juju-A chem pg is when you have a very very early miscarriage so you would test earlier than you should then later get negative or lighter lines until there's no pg anymore :-(. 

I'm fed up getting a bit down thinking I'm never going to see a BFP again . It's so hard when you have had a few negatives . Just can't get positive at moment . I don't know what I'm going to do on this forthcoming 2ww as I even feel sick when I'm not on meds!! :-/


----------



## juju81

Amanda it sounds like your getting yourself all worked up.  Totally understandable, don't get me wrong.  You know I struggled big time with my 2ww.  Is the something you can do to distract yourself? Do you swim?


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- I'm going to be on a long stretch at wrk which should distract me . I'm working thur fri sat sun off mon in tue wed thur fri ! Yes think I'm getting worked up just worried what this one is going to be like and worried about the outcome


----------



## juju81

It's just so stressful.  It makes me feel sick thinking about it.  I really do have everything crossed that this cycle will be your last and your'll get a lovely BFP....and some money back on the sticks


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, I know how you feel, I've only had one BFN and have had bouts of feeling very very down and convinced it was never going to happen. But you have to think positive - if you are determined enough it WILL happen, just look around this site and you'll see ladies who have been through such unimaginable trials and still come out the other side having achieved their dream. 


This may sound odd but have you considered having a little time away from FF during your 2ww. I have already thought about it and think during my 2ww (hopefully starting next week   ) I might lie low for a bit. It was just so stressful last time round seeing other ladies getting their BFPs, though of course I was happy for them, but it seemed to put a lot of pressure on me to get the same. Also I kept reading about other ladies' experiences, comparing it to my own, obsessing about symptoms etc. It might help you stay calm if you stay away for a little while or at least limit how much you come on. Anyway sending you lots of        Looks like we may be on the 2ww together again, let's hope it's a good one for both of us.


----------



## juju81

Laying low is definitely a good idea.  I found myself looking at all the updated threads and scaring myself.  Still do now.  Sometimes too much info is bad for you.


From my point of view, I do feel guilty that I got a BFP and you didn't and I know you wouldn't want me to feel like that (hope so anyway    ) but I can't help it.  A lot of people from my IUI board didnt either and I felt massively guilty considering I already have Noah too and most don't even have one


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - hayyy no matter how I feel I would never ever ever begrudge anyone or feel jealous of anyone on this site ever  please don't feel guilty that's the last thing I'd ever want  . Everybody that has if problems well and truly deserves getting a BFP wether its your first or your fourth  . Bfps give me some hope  

Carrie - yes I might just nip on now and again . Will be working a lot over my 2 ww so that will help it pass and stop me obsessing . I might make plans for when I'm off too so not sitting around thinking about it  . Feel free to pm if you want to though   understand if you don't though   Think we should think we have had a BFP before and no reason it can't happen again..


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda, exactly - we have been pregnant before and we will be again! It may take us longer to get there than we planned but just think how happy we will be when we finally get there. I sometimes think the silver lining in IF is that we know how lucky we are and really appreciate everything about our LOs because we know how precious they are and because of what we've been through to get them. When we have our baby number two think how precious and wonderful they will be.   


Juju, no way should you feel guilty - it's not your fault Amanda and I got BFNs. Personally I am really pleased for you and yes, it gives me hope that if it could happen for you it will happen for me too. It is just hard though to think that I should have been a few days behind you and experiencing everything you are right now. But I'll just have to be a bit further behind you than I thought


----------



## JanaH

Amanda and Carrie      it is so hard to get negatives. I had a negative on my first IVF and on all my iui, and that was so hard, but the hardest part was the 2 miscarriages. Don't be hard on yourselves, you've been pregnant before so no reason why it won't work again.    



I'm not using cyclogest I'm on crinone and it is so much easier no mess and you only use it in the evening before bed. I took a digital test when I got back from picking Joseph up from nursery and it said pregnant 1-2.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

JanaH   

Juju - a chemical pregnancy is defined as one that is only detected by chemicals in the blood (pee sticks) and there is nothing visible on ultrasound. A clinical pregnancy is defined as one that is visible on ultrasound and viable when there is fetal heart action.


----------



## JanaH

Well what can I say.... Started bleeding last night, really dark brown and this morning the word on the test came up as Not pregnant. So I guess thats another chemical for us, I will still need to test on Friday but don't think anything will change.


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh no Jana, I can't believe it x sending big hugs xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- are you sure the test you used would work at this stage? It is a while off your otd?  . I thought dark brown was old blood too ?


----------



## juju81

Omg janah, sending big hugs hun


----------



## hakunamatata

Janah I'm mortified for you sweetie. Life is too cruel. Sending the biggest hugs, i just pray its wrong x x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

JanaH    I hope it's a false alarm


----------



## JanaH

Thanks ladies,


I used a clearblue digital this morning that came up not pregnant I did take it apart and the one of yesterday and the lines looks exactly the same. So I did a clear blue + and a superdrug test and they came up with second lines it is light but it is there. I spoke to the clinic this morning and they said the bleeding is not my period as it doesn't sound like a normal period, they still want me to continue the meds and test on Friday as thats my otd for them. I don't want to give up hope yet but omw this is a cruel world. Our parents did not know about treatment so we told them all last night and now this.


Sorry about the me post...


----------



## amandaloo

Jana-    theres still hope there then     . Really feel for you really do Its so stressful and upsetting   You so deserve for this to be the one   .


----------



## carrie lou

Oh no Jana, sorry to read this - it is such a cruel business   I have my fingers crossed it is just an implantation bleed and everything may yet turn out OK. If it isn't like your period then maybe there is still hope, I really really hope so     


AFM, had my scan this morning but follies are growing a bit slower than expected, looks like this is one of my longer cycles   so I'm back for another scan on Friday (work are going to love me) and fingers crossed will be ready to trigger then.


----------



## JanaH

Hope you are all set for trigger on Friday Carrie, when you want things to go quickly it goes slow and the otherway around.


I'm still bleeding but is quite dark red, I don't have any cramps or anything like I had before. I don't want to get my hopes up, I hate the fact that they don't do bloodtests. DH wants to do FET if this turns out to be negative, think after that I will call time out, I can't deal with this anymore. But lets see what Fridays test brings.


----------



## juju81

Janah just keep going as you are as the clinic say   it's just an unfair roller coaster all of this  

Carrie   for follie growth for Friday


----------



## carrie lou

Jana, I have everything crossed for you sweetie - it is so hard. The fact that your tests are still positive is a good sign surely? I hope so    


Thanks Jana and Ju, I'm wondering if I should cuddle a hot water bottle or something to help the follies along   Can't hurt I suppose can it.


----------



## juju81

Carrie I did.  In July it that heat wave   I had a fan on the go to to cool me down ha ha


----------



## carrie lou

Hot water bottle in place. Feet up. Cup of tea and big slice of cake.


----------



## amandaloo

Janah-    keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you   

Carrie-  think I might join you


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- have you decided how many to transfer yet?


----------



## carrie lou

We decided to go for one in the end. Dr said putting two back only increases the chances of success by about 5%, whereas if we put just one back we will have another really good chance waiting in the freezer should we need it. And my mum is helping us out with the cost, she has been amazing   so money isn't such an issue.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - I would have done the same in your shoes 

Afm- just got a smily face looks ill be having insem tomorrow quite excited now .


----------



## JanaH

Yeah Amanda good luck it is tomorrow.


----------



## hakunamatata

Good luck tomorrow Amanda, I have a really good feeling for you. 

Carrie, grow follies grow. I had cake today too. I have a friend staying and off to the farm and cafe we went.  X 

Janah I'm liking the hope, keep it alive honey, big prays and hugs x x x


----------



## carrie lou

Good luck Amanda    


Thanks Hakuna


----------



## juju81

Good luck Amanda hun


----------



## amandaloo

Help - I got a negative face this morn ! Now I don't know what to do! I have a irritable and overactive bladder so I did go to the toilet loads and loads during the night wondered if that effected it. The clinic won't be happy if I ring as I'm supposed to put it in the fridge the night sample and not test it if its negative in the morn ! Uh god !


----------



## amandaloo

Maybe the panic is over just done another as I put my wee in a pot and there's a smily face now  I can't help thinking its wrong though as when I take it out if holder there is not two lines just a smudge across? It was like that on last nights test too . It says on leaflet though not to go off the test strip itself  . Right must calm down now . I will just go and get it done today what will be will be


----------



## JanaH

Amanda did you speak to your clinic? Hope it all goes well if you have your insemination today.

Afm: I had really painful ovaries since yesterday evening and the bleeding continued. I seemed to have eased off a bit today, but it is still red. I've done another test this morning and its still positive (the lines is still light but visible, it wasn't fmu) I don't know what to think, is it a period and my levels hasn't dropped low enough.


----------



## amandaloo

Jana-    have you spoke to your clinic today? Or are you waiting until tomorrow otd? Really hope that everything turns out ok for you . Must be a stressful time are you off work?

I rang the nurse she said I should have it today as my first test I did last night was positive smiley and I hadn't been to the toilet for few hours plus its around right time in my cycle ( 14 day today)  It's most probably because of my overactive irritable bladder as I must have got up at least 8 times in night for a wee. I usually have meds for condition but can't do when having tx and trying for baby so got to put up with it .. . I always find I go loo more around time of lh surge and I was hot last night too . Maybe I'm risking it but anyway !!


----------



## pippilongstockings

Just a quickie for Jana - with Z I had bright red bleeding a few days before AF was due. It was just like a normal period. I booked in for next cycle of IUI but the clinic made me test on OTD just in case and it was positive. I really hope it's the same for you lovely       

Hi to everyone else! xx


----------



## JanaH

Thanks Pippi, it stories like yours that gives me hope. The fact that I'm just bleeding and not shedding my lining makes me positive, last time I had the chemical at 5 weeks but bleeding only started after I stopped my meds and it was extremly heavy with clots (sorry tmi)


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies 

Well had diui done   fingers crossed for the  . I didnt ask the how many millions there was as it didnt help me last time ! dh pushed the plunger too this time ..I'm going to try and refrain from symptom spotting ! Be on a long stretch at wrk from tomorrow too so hopefully be a bit distracted . Heck that was stressful today all the nurses I spoke to said it was best to make decision to do it today . 

Carrie- best of luck for tomorrow 

Jana I'm keeping everything crossed for you


----------



## JanaH

Yeah Amanda for being PUPO    take it easy at work though


----------



## carrie lou

Congrats on being PUPO Amanda, fingers crossed this so the one for you    


Jana, still got everything crossed for you  hopefully the positive test is a reassuring sign   


DH and I have been having terrible rows, did any of you have lots of arguments when going through treatment? It's not even the treatment we're fighting about most of the time, it's just that things are so fraught at the moment what with DH's depression and the uncertainty over his job... I hate it, we should be sticking together more than ever and instead we are squabbling over stupid things


----------



## JanaH

Another chemical for us....    bleeding wasn't period I had scan this morning as I've been in a lot of pain. There is a corpus luteum cyst that caused the pain and a few dark spots that caused the bleeding. 

Carrie how did your scan go today?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

So sorry jan


----------



## hakunamatata

Janah I'm so so sorry x x


----------



## carrie lou

Jana I'm so sorry honey, life can be so cruel   Are you going to go back for your frosties?    

Scan went well, lining and follicles perfect so trigger injection tonight and ET next Friday


----------



## hakunamatata

So glad its all going well for you Carrie.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- great news  . Yes we do argue more around treatment bicker about  silly things its not nice . We are more aware nowadays so we try not to wind each other up but it still happens even though we try but not as much  . It's not nice is it   just adds to the stress  . My dh also gets depression and has been off work with it in past for several months so know how you feel it's not easy   . You have a lot going on just make sure you look after yourself too   . Get yourself out for a meal with the girls or something have some time out . I only say that because when dh was depressed and off work I never felt that I got a break from him as he was always there . You might need some time out 

Jana- I am so so sorry lots of hugs going your way    really wanted it to be your time


----------



## amandaloo

Janah - still thinking about you  

Carrie - hope it goes well Friday

Juju- has your bump got any bigger?

Hope everyone is ok it's quiet on here 

Afm - think I'm coping bit better with this 2ww been distracted at work and mostly forget I'm on the 2ww whilst I'm there .


----------



## JanaH

Amanda glad you are coping better this time round.     


Juju how did your scan go?


Carrie not long till Friday     


I'm really struggling to believe that it is all over, I'm still waiting for my periods to start. I had my first day back at work and as soon as I walked in I started crying. I've been crying so much since Friday. Still waiting for my appointment with the consultant, I've got loads of questions to ask him... Won't be able to do FET this year as to close to us flying in December.


----------



## carrie lou

Jana   I was like that after my BFN, I cried for a long time   Hope your appointment comes round quickly and you get some answers   I found the only thing that made me feel any better was having a plan for what to do next. 


Amanda, glad to hear you are coping better this time, I found on my 2ww I was so busy at work I didn't have time to think about symptoms, pregnancy tests etc. Fingers crossed for you    


AFM, not much to say, just waiting for ET on Friday


----------



## hakunamatata

Janah let it all out honey to get that close and the disappointment is overwhelming. Biggest hugs coming your way x 

Amanda glad its going better for you hun. Pray this is your time. X 

3 more sleeps Carrie, x


----------



## juju81

Janah massive hugs hunny   when are you seeing mr booker?

Amanda, when is OTD?  

Carrie, Friday can't come soon enough   got everything crossed for you xx

Just back from the scan.  Little embryo has grown beautifully.  Bang on dates, measuring 7+1 and that what I am.  Heartbeat going really fast and due date is 14/4/14! I asked him what the chance of the embryo not growing anymore and he said its a perfect early preg scan.  He said he's done loads and would see a problem if there was one and that he doesn't think we'll have any problems.  . Still can't believe it really.  It's all a bit surreal.  I hope and pray you all get your BFP soon, I really am rooting for you


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah hun


----------



## amandaloo

Jana- massive hugs   . Hope you get the answers when you speak to your consultant . It's hard to get over a BFN give yourself time  . Once you have a new plan you will feel better  

Juju- 5th sept  . Yay glad all went well yesterday how come you have had two scans? 

Hak- when are you trying again?

Mightymini- how are you? 

Carrie -   

Holly- how did you get on with dh having the accident?

Afm- had a small amount of brown blob discharge yesterday just on one wipe sorry tmi . It set me off with thinking is it implantation bleeding . It def wont be my af . I don't know anyway just   .


----------



## carrie lou

Amanda


----------



## juju81

Amanda, wow could be hun, keeping everything crossed for you hun    I don't know why I get 2, did with Noah too  

I feel a bit odd posting in here at the moment.  I don't want to join the general preg boards either so I'm just going to check on in every now and then whilst you all get your BFP's   

I'll be updating my diary now and then so your welcome to read my updates 

Wishing you all the best of luck


----------



## amandaloo

Juju -  dont go !! I want you to stay here !!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju it's what this board is for numpty!


----------



## juju81

I just don't feel I can post at the mo.  just feel like I'm rubbing it in everyone's faces   dunno just feel weird


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju it's a pregnancy board.   as long as you're sensitive then it's fine. Look at me. I've a natural but I didn't disappear. I felt funny too but stayed around cos I needed support with the donor issue.


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - honesty I don't feel like your doing that at all    . I'd feel weird if you weren't here !


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, there's no reason you should go - this thread is for pregnancy AND parenting both. As long as you are sensitive about what you post (which you have been) you're certainly not rubbing anyone's nose in it. Post wherever you feel most comfortable


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I'm on here at 20 weeks. All of us have a child. It is the pregnancy board after all. If anyone is finding it painful at the moment there are TTC boards.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

have you had your gender scan yet holly?


----------



## hakunamatata

Ju don't be daft, you stay where you are.

Amanda I'm cycling next month eekk


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Mini - Monday   Bit nervous - mainly to see baby OK. It wiggles a lot so hopefully it is OK.


----------



## carrie lou

How exciting Holly, I'm sure everything will be fine. Nice to have a wriggly one on board. Zac was like that too, never still for a moment and he still isn't now   I predict another little boy for you   


Have a terrible headache this morning   Can it be a side effect of cyclogest? I googled it but am still none the wiser   Have to go to work today as well so hoping it will improve soon or I might be coming home early


----------



## amandaloo

Good luck today Carrie x


----------



## juju81

Couldn't stay away!

Carrie, hope today went as planned  

Holly, good luck for Monday.  Do you have any thoughts on what your having? I'm starting to think I'm carrying a girl this time!  Is hubby back yet?

Amanda, not long left now, got everything crossed for you  

Pinkcat, how are you doing hun? Hve you had your can yet?

Pippi, have you made a decision yet?

xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Pinkcat, oh that is a long wait for your scan   but you're right, £258 is a bit steep   


Hope everyone else is well   

Ladies thank you all so much for your positivity and good wishes. I'm pleased to report transfer went really well today. Little embie survived the thaw very well, lost a few cells but not too many, and started to hatch by the time it was put back. I think I'm going to take a bit of a break from FF for the next few days, it's just that after the trauma of my last cycle, I feel like I need a bit of space to keep my PMA going... I hope you understand, I really really appreciate the support from all of you and will be back as soon as I have some news .


----------



## juju81

Carrie don't blame you, I had to for a few days on my tww!

Pinkcat, do you not have a babybond anywhere near? Ours is a good 30mins but the 6wk scans aren't that pricey   have you got a due date?


----------



## JanaH

Carrie glad ET went well. Take it easy    


Pinkcat wow 3 more weeks thats a long wait.


Amanda hope you are well    


Holly not long until Monday can't wait to hear what you are having. 


Afm I still here, today 3 years ago we transferred our two embies and now the result of it is sitting in the bath.    Still no sign of my period... Will call the clinic on Monday if nothing happens over the weekend, my body doesn't know what is happening to it. We are booking a long weekend to Majorca as we are both so tired its been a hectic year. I've been so tired today nearly slept the whole afternoon.


----------



## juju81

Janah   have you done another test?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Good news carrie  

Janah  

Pinkcat a scan at a bupa hospital was only £100. Is there one in your area?


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - great news lots of    and hope you are back with very good news  

Jana-   the break will do you good maybe time to relax   


Juju- yay your back 

Pinkcat- what a wait  

Afm-  I'm now 9dpiui losing my positivity a bit feel like af is on its way which is usual around this time   and feel like I have pmt anyway I suppose I'll find out soon there's still hope yet


----------



## juju81

Amanda, it might not be pmt.  I am a hormonal wreck screeching like a banshee most days.  Keep up tht PMA lovely


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - you could be right I'm exhausted at mo just done a long stretch at wrk I've worked every day since my iui bar Monday when I travelled to Chester for the day . I asked dh for a lie in and he didn't give me one so I'm   with him and last night dh was swearing in front of Noah and I flipped . I'm always telling him off for it   it's like soon as a bottle of beer has touched his mouth he starts swearing !


----------



## juju81

Urgh I'm forever telling nick to watch his language.  He just doesn't think, it's like it's part of his vocabulary


----------



## hakunamatata

Ohhh holly exciting for monday. So many lovely memories about feeling Addi move. 

Ju glad ypu stuck around.

Carrie congrats on being Pupo hun, hope this is the one. Were you brave enough to find out if recpient pg? Not easy any of it.

Amanda kerp the faith hun, i know its hard after all youve been through. x 

Home alone today Hubby is working, extra money for treatment.

Might visit local farm and have cake when Addi wakes. 

Hello to all x


----------



## juju81

Holly, how did today go? Come tell us the flavour  

Amanda how u doing??

Those who have had more than one....is it 'normal' to pretty much need mat clothes at 8wks


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- well I'm resisting testing ! Now going a bit mad too ! I'm off work so hard not to think about  it . I'm not positive though had af pains all day for several days now that's usual for my normal cycle . But you can get af pains in 2ww though but not sure if constantly . I can remember getting af pains with Noah . But can't remember if it was like this . Anyway I'll have to see . Wish I was more positive. I've been searching holidays abroad today to try and keep my mind off it all . I'm 11 dpiui today not sure when to test might even wait till very last minute even after test day as last time I tested then af came in a few hours    . How are you you must be growing asking about mat clothes  

Holly - any news ?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hi!

Baby looked perfect and beautiful on the scan.

And think of rose petals, strawberries, raspberries and marshmallows for the flavour!

Hehehe!


----------



## juju81

Awww holly a lovely little girl      I'm thinking I'm carrying a girl 


Amanda, keep up that PMA lovely, your on the home stretch now     my clothes are getting really tight round my waist.  I lost a lb this week too so I know it's not from my stuffing


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yep you pop out much more the second time. I already look and feel about 8 months!


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh yay, holly that is fab news xxx

Juju, when's your next scan?


----------



## juju81

That's true Pinkcat, helps the anxiety a bit tho  

Fizzy, I'm back to the good old nhs now so will be my 12wk scan.  Got midwife booking in appointment Thursday so should receive a date for tht in the next week or so.

Have you thought about any more treatment?


----------



## amandaloo

Pink cat-   can you not ring and bring it forward ? Perhaps they counted dates wrong when they booked? 

Holly- congrats lovely news     

Juju- thanks


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Aww a pink one  

Ju yes I needed mat clothes at 8 wks. I showed so much work guessed I was preggo


----------



## Fizzypop

I'm starting my monitoring cycle at argc tomorrow, feeling a bit scared but excited at the same time  won't cycle until later in the year tho xxx


----------



## juju81

Minx I coud see some bloke out the coner of my eye at the photocopier today staring at my gut.  Obviously too scared to ask ha ha


Ooooooh fizzy, exciting stuff, is that like a months monitoring?


----------



## amandaloo

Fizzy- owww exciting


----------



## northernmonkey

Hi ladies,

I never get chance to post anymore so am just popping on now whilst feeding Thing 3 as she is affectionately known.  

Juju - congratulations on your BFP!  That's a 100% bfp rate for you isn't it?!  Your edd is my wedding anniversary and if you hang on until 19th it's my second dd's birthday. Oh and about mat clothes at 8 weeks - I wish I'd needed them then - I was still in normal clothes until around 13 weeks and was so annoyed cos I couldn't wait to be in my maternity stuff! I've got a long body and short legs though so I think babies have loads of growing upwards in my stomach before they have to start growing out if that makes sense! 

Holly - yay, a girl!! Glad your scan went well today, when is your due date, I can't remember now.... Did dh go with you today? 

Amanda - fingers crossed for testing - got a good feeling for you. I tested 3 days before OTD with my last bfp and got a +ve. 

Jana - really sorry to read that your last cycle didn't work out. I know this might sound strange but I had 4 unsuccessful cycles when trying for dd#2 and at the time each bfn seemed to hit me harder than the last.  I became increasingly despondent and used to look at maternity wear in the Next directory, convinced that I would never get to wear mine again.  Then my fifth cycled (well actually I think it was my 7th because we had two abandoned) I got a bfp and when baby was born I was so thankful that I had got pregnant the month that I did because I wouldn't have swapped her for anything. I guess what I'm saying is hang in there, believe that this time next year you will be either cuddling your baby or stroking your bump.  x 

Mini - hiya,  how are your two little boys doing?  Hope they get on better than my two girls - they probably manage to play nicely for half an hour a day.... And it can only get worse when they start pinching each others clothes, make up and boyfriends.... 

Right gotta go and start ironing name labels into school uniform for Wednesday.  Hello to everyone, sorry for lack of personals. 

NM x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

oh Fizzy - exciting that you are getting going again.

Northern Monkey - you were brave to go for a third after 7 cycles for number 2.

I feel incredibly lucky that I have had 3 pregnancies out of 4 cycles, even though #1 was a terrible time - I still wonder what that baby would have been like and what was wrong with it.
Multiple BFNs must feel very disheartening.

Thanks for the good wishes. I am over the moon. I am going to have to have my arms tied to my side not to pick up every good quality bit of cute pink clothing I see in sales or charity shops. There is not enough room in this house and I have lots of neutral stuff already.

My DH did not come to scan   One of my best friends came with me and waited outside with C for most of it as children are not allowed in the room, even though he was snoring. She came in for the gender reveal moment which was nice to share it with someone. Then we went for a celebration lunch at Pizza Express.

DH did ask about it this evening and was persuaded to look at a picture. He guessed it was a girl. His accident has made him realise that he can't manage alone. We all went for a lovely day out on the beach on Saturday with his older son and C. He acted like a human being all day and we had a really nice day. Shows he can do it. We'll see.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Glad you had a nice day with dh holly  

Nm nice to see you back. The boys love each other one minute and argue the next. Ds2 is starting to get a temper and screams at ds1 if he's annoyed him.  

They kiss and cuddle each other. It's so sweet


----------



## northernmonkey

Holly - I'm just a stubborn git and refused to give in! Dd#3 was much easier than dd#2 (by that I mean getting a bfp but it was just as stressful.) I can't imagine how you learn to live with losing a baby so far on in pregnancy - I felt all mine moving at exactly 16 weeks when you lost yours.  Did the hospital not carry out tests to try to establish why your first baby died?  What a shame your dh didn't come with you today. I hope if he's still on the scene in years to come he has the guts to look your children in the eye and explain why he didn't bother to go to their scans. Is he planning on being with you for the birth? 

Mini - dd#2 has had a temper since day 1.  She's a right madam ha ha. 

Highlight of my week is about to happen - new series of doc Martin just starting!! Sunday used to be my ironing night in front of the tv with Mr Selfridge then something else that my mummy brain has forgotten the name of.  Looks like Monday is the new Sunday


----------



## amandaloo

Nm- I love doc Martin too . How funny the policeman being best man ha!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

NM - it is sad for me, but there is nothing I can do. I think of him or her as a grandchild for my mum in heaven. The funeral was on the anniversary of her death (arranged by the hospital 3 months after the miscarriage - so a weird co-incidence). Since then I have been sent pennies to find on the ground before every appointment during treatment, pregnancy and birth - very very odd. I have a bag full of them now. I even found one on Saturday and one on Sunday this week! Pennies from heaven. She used to say ''find a penny, pick it up, all the day you will have good luck''.

I did ask the hospital for results as they kept the baby in the lab for testing for 2 months, but I was only told the placenta was normal, nothing about the baby.

I felt C move at 15.5 weeks, but I have felt this one from 11 weeks 5 days, which I found incredible, but it has got more and stronger ever since so it must have been. Baby is kicking a lot right now. It is such a lovely feeling. I am so lucky.


----------



## Fizzypop

Ju, yep they do monitoring for a month as they reckon it gets the best treatment course for you...to be honest I picked them because convenient for work (20 min tube ride)...didn't have a choice before but now am paying then wanted to make life bit easier, plus treatment price on a par with our old clinic and really good stats so bit of a no brainer. But my friend emailed me the other day to say new clinic opened in chelmsford which is much more convenient, but so new no stats and no staff!!! Maybe by the new year, but just not sure, although they are allied to herts and Essex they are not part of them iykwim. Bloody hate this roller coaster but am determined to complete my gorgeous little family xxx even if my eh can be a bit of a    sometimes as they all can lol!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Fizzy where do you live? 

Holly did you find out if the baby  you lost was a boyor girl? The pennies must be a nice feeling. I found a feather when I mc.  I've still got it


----------



## Fizzypop

We live just outside Chelmsford. Old clinic was in colchester and work in London so did loads of backwards and forwards and needing half day for a quick scan. Grrr.


----------



## juju81

NM, lovely to see you back.  Yes I've had 100% success   this will be my last though, I can't do it again, the tx stresses me out too much I'm more then happy with 2  

Fizzy, my clinic was 1.5hrs away and I often had to take the whole arvo off just for a quick scan or blood test   so I don't blame you for going nearer.  ARGC has fab results  

Holly, it's nice you spent the day as a family.  This may be the change he needed to wake up and take responsibility?? Have you thought of any names yet? It's a mind field.  I've heard a lot of people say tey felt consecutive babies move earlier.  Can't wait for that

Amanda   

Carrie if your reading


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I've always had a girls name in mind from when my DH and I sat on the patio when we had been together one month and talked about having a little girl   I later found out that the name was my paternal Grandmother's middle name.

But I am now not sure about the middle name I chose to go with it as I was put off my choice when I googled it.

Got to get a bit further with this pregnancy before I get too carried away. It is not viable for at least another 3 weeks, and even then most are too small to survive. When I get to 30 weeks I will be more confident.


----------



## amandaloo

Hi sorry me post 

Opinions needed please ! And it's not about tx or symptoms  . My mum told me today that when my dad retires at end of sept I don't need to send dh to nursery anymore they will both look after him . I'm a bit torn as I like the idea he mixes with others at nursery and my mum is excellent with learning him things and playing I can't fault her she even meets up with my cousin so he mixes with others . I'm a bit mad with nursery today so might not be best time to decide he has gone in a new class and I was greeted with " why dont you split his days as he only comes once a week " well I said no obviously but I thought its never been an issue before !! Cheeky swines !


----------



## juju81

Do tell holly  

Amanda, I was king to say could he not split his time but if he only goes once a week then you can't split it.  When does he get his 15hrs free?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Amanda - can't advise until you tell us which days you work, when he goes to nursery and how long for and whether you can get half day sessions and where it is in relation to your work, your home and your parents. Are your parents near by and will they be reliable if they are ill for instance?

If you are working full time and planning to send him to them full time then it might be too much for them and cause problems after a while. My friend's parents look after the girls and the mum is fine with it, but the dad got really fed up with the constant commitment.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

My parents have my 2 plus dh's mum has them. They do 2 half sessions at nursery to ease the child care. I'm glad they go as it has prepared ds1 for pre-school. They learn a lot from nursery.


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- I work full time so does dh . I work long days 4 a week but that sometimes includes weekends . I get monday off every week .My dh works 4 days a week full time he gets a wed off so dh goes to nursery on a Tuesday and my mum has ds on a Thursday and Friday ( that's if I'm working those days ) . My mum also takes ds to nursery and back on a tue . I purposely chose the nursery that was closest to my mum rather than me . My mum has always said she would do it the whole time but I thought Ds would benefit ..ps glad you had a nice day with hubby  

Mini - yes I think it does ds good too . My mums offer has thrown me a bit ! 

Juju - thanks for reply too   

I've been in a bit of a state today been crying and all sorts I've ended up going to see my friend feel a bit better now  .


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Well why don't you keep nursery up, but do Tues and Thursday mornings and have him picked up after lunch so that he gets two good play sessions a week with perhaps different children and socialises at lunchtime. 

If the money would be good right now, then stop nursery for a while until next September when they get 15 hours.

Personally I think nursery is good for them and it won't be such a new wrench to go 5 mornings a week if he has already been doing 2.


----------



## juju81

I agree with holly, maybe 2 mornings will be more beneficial?? Noah want 3 mornings then when he got his funding I sent him everyday! Does the world of good.  My nephew doesn't go and I think he really needs it.  His bloody mothers a nightmare tho


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I wouldn't stop nursery. It'll be harder for him to go back. Just do 2 half days. Use it as a benefit for him. I do shift work. I work every wed as a rule, sometimes on a fri I'm off bit they are in nursery. I use it to sort the house out and a learning experience for them.


----------



## amandaloo

Thanks for advice ladies  I'm not going to stop nursery I felt like it this morning though . I would have to have a word with my mum and dad if they would do the to in and fro in as it would be them taking him and bringing him back . I only do it if I am off that day . But yeah good ideas thanks . He managed well anyway today . He always has done doing a day a week it's just that new lady in the room he went in today said about two half days which I feel is a bit previous seeing as it was his first day in there they don't even know him yet !

Mini - I use it to clean up if I'm off too   or have a nap ! 

Holly- I'm going to increase his hours when he gets his 15 hours for sure


----------



## amandaloo

Another BFN for us    onwards and upwards eh x


----------



## juju81

Amanda   your OTD isn't until Saturday is it?


----------



## amandaloo

No it's tomorrow juju used a clear blue digital so know its right . I def feel like af will come today . I decided to test today as I'm working tomorrow . I'm going to book a holiday now and have a break this month x


----------



## Fizzypop

Amanda    . Book a holiday sounds like a good idea xxx I will still keep everything crossed for a change over night


----------



## juju81

Oh hun   defo book a holiday.  Somewhere hot or UK? Either will be bloody needed now


----------



## amandaloo

I'm thinking Portugal its quite cheap but because I've never been I'm struggling choosing a resort ! It's either that or Majorca can get a cheapy there too . We are very disappointed but again we will keep trying . I said to dh should we just do Ivf next time but he thinks we should have one more go at iui . It's going to be a long journey I've been trying now for a year heck where does time go ??


----------



## juju81

I've never been to either of those places.  Both are meant to be lovely.  Had it really been a year? I know it doesn't make it any easier, can only imagine what hell a BFN is but each month is another month Noah's getting older and in some respects will make it easier when baby comes


----------



## Fizzypop

Amanda - we are looking at Portugal for next year and just got back from menorca. We went to a first choice holiday village. Really good entertainment for kids (but not adults!) swimming pools fab and food amazing quality xxx


----------



## JanaH

Amanda - so sorry its a BFN - we booked to go to Alcudia in October for a long weekend it looks lovely there and we found a good deal for the 3 of us.


Juju how are you feeling?


Fizzy good luck with your monitoring cycle.


AFM still no AF, I'm a bit annoyed with the clinic at the moment. I booked an appointment to go and see the consultant which is tonight so hopefully we will get some answers to why AF haven't made an appearance as yet. (secretly I'm hoping it has worked)


----------



## Fizzypop

Have u done another test? X


----------



## JanaH

No I haven't done another test


----------



## juju81

Janah.......WTF........TEST


----------



## juju81

Now


----------



## juju81

My god my nerves can't take it.  I'm assuming uve stopped all drugs?


----------



## juju81

Fizzy I'm feeling a bit ropey, tired and a bit hormonal......all good signs tho   I've got my midwife tomorrow morning so will seem a bit more real when I'm in the system!! Hopefully will get my appointment for my 12scan too.


----------



## Fizzypop

Woop woop! 

Jana, just test. I can't do big letters like ju but do it do it do it!!!


----------



## amandaloo

Jana - you should do a test xx 

My af is here bang on queue ! Well I can see the start of it anyway ! Wish I hadn't waisted a clear blue digital now  

I'm in a tizz now looking for hols I wish trip advisor didn't exist sometimes you just find something then dreams are shattered by bad reviews !!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- good luck Tomorrow xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Janah ooooh scary mary - do the test   

Amanda               hope you find a holiday soon

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## hakunamatata

Oh Amanda I'm so sorry hun, you do so well. Hope you find the brilliant holiday you deserve. We go to Butlins Friday. X 

Ju good luck booking in. 

Fizzy hope monitoring goes well. X


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Amanda so sorry hun  

Janah my af took its time to arrive after a chem pg.   have you had cramps? I had terrible cramps. So bad I ended up in a&e.   basically just like a mc.   hope everything is ok.   they need to scan you in case it's ectopic.


----------



## juju81

Janah, how did you get in last night?


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- how was your appt?

Jana - hope your ok how did it go?


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi,

Amanda - sorry about BFN   . Hope you get a nice holiday booked - definitely a good move. 

Juju - Glad things are going well with mini bump.

Mistletoe - Congrats on having a little girl! Exciting.

Jana - Hope appointment went ok. Thinking of you.

Carrie - If you are reading, wishing you lots of luck. 

AFM - We had a lovely holiday, lots of fun celebrating my daughter's 1st birthday, and now I'm back on the treatment rollercoaster! Had my first iui today in fact so I'm now on the 2ww. I'm feeling very relaxed about it at the moment to be honest but that will no doubt change, and I'm sure if it's BFN it will be just as devastating as ever.


----------



## JanaH

Well I had my appointment last night only for the consultant not to have my notes to go through the cycle... Annoyed doesn't even come close to it, must say he was not happy either. He did a scan and my lining is 7mm and it looks like I'm mid cycle so somewhere along the way I missed a period   . We discussed FET, and I told him we are off to SA in December so he won't do any treatment before we are back. He is going to go through my whole file to see if there is anymore tests that I need as this was the second chemical. I also told him he needs to consider doing endometrial scratch before the FET as I got pregnant with J after the ERPC. If he suggest any immune treatment I think we will stop as I'm not going down that way.


Abcdefgh - good luck with the 2ww


Carrie - hope you are ok


Ju how was your midwife appt?


----------



## amandaloo

Abcdef- hello  congrats on being pupo best of luck on your tww   . Glad you enjoyed your holiday 

Jana- how annoying   you must have been fuming . What's an endometrial scratch? hope your ok? 

Juju- you never said about how appt was?

Ceci-  

Afm- booked holiday to kos   going next Sunday . Will start again with tx in Octobers cycle . I cried in my managers office today having supervision   oh dear . Right better get Noah bathed .


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Amanda done that too   that's what supervision is for  

Abcd good luck  

Janah  

Nothing to report my end. Samuel still not walking


----------



## juju81

Abcd, good luck with treatment no2 

Carrie, not long now I don't think 

Amanda, don't blame you for booking the holiday. I'm a bit jel, I love going away and forgetting the 'real' world  thanks for asking, midwife was fine, she's lovely. Because I've moved I've not got my old one but this one is lovely. She's referring me to an aneathestist because of my morphing allergy, a cons because of my endo and IUI conception and a midwife who deals in previous traumatic births just so you can sit through and talk about how you might want things different  never heard of that before but she seems very keen to get you all the help you need! She also said she'd bet money on me not having a labour like last time so that's made me a bit more positive! Obviously can't say for sure but generally most subsequent labours are quicker  

Just waiting for my 12scan appointment to come through now. Nearly 9 weeks. It really is flying


----------



## carrie lou

Hi everyone, I'm back   


I'm very pleased to tell you I got a faint BFP this morning    The line is faint but it's definitely there. I'm 9dp6dt transfer which I think makes me 4+1, so still early days, but DH and I are cautiously optimistic. It was good to have a break from FF (though I was still reading the threads I moderate so not a total break!) as I've managed to be a bit more relaxed and less obsessive this time.


I can see I have lots to catch up n but just wanted to send a big   to Amanda, sorry for your BFN - really hope it will be your time soon. And lots of      to Abcde for your 2ww


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## juju81

Whooo hoo congrats Carrie


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Fabulous news Carrie


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## amandaloo

Carrie - fabulous news


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Great news carrie


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## abcdefgh

Congrats Carrie     So exciting!


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## juju81

Pinkcat have you seen your doc yet or waiting until your scan? Only Im not sure what the wait is around your area but I saw my doc at 4wks, midwife last thurs at 8+3 and my scan came through today for my 12 wk scan.  Our hospital are chocka and like to get you booked in ASAP!  I'm not sure they would have got me in for my 12wk scan if I didnt go to doc until 9wks!


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## carrie lou

Thank you ladies   it hasn't sunk in yet and I have to keep looking at the positive test to make sure I didn't dream it   


Pinkcat, sure the sickness is a reassuring sign   I had it from about 6 weeks with Zac. Every pregnancy is different I suppose   


Juju, ohh glad you mentioned that - I've been wondering when to book in with my midwife. I know there are only two community midwives serving our entire town, so they are crazy busy   Better get in there quick.


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## juju81

I left it later with Noah and only just got my nuchal scan in time.  I know it might seem really early but it took about 3wks for the midwife appoint to come through! 

Pinkcat my sickness really stepped up at 7wks.  It feels like it it's starting to subside.  In fact apart from the tiredness it all seems like its subsiding.  I'm hoping its because I'm 9wks and not because something has happened


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## JanaH

Congrats Carrie      take it easy and look after yourself.


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## pippilongstockings

Wooohooooo Carrie and Pinkcat - great news


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

It can get better about 10 weeks, but don't get too complacent - I thought mine was better in this pregnancy for a week or two and then I was really busy with C's party and staying up at night to decorate cakes, make party bags etc and I was running to the loo vomitting for a few days.


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## juju81

I went to early pregnancy unit this morning. I'd got myself into a bit of a state.  Thankfully everything is ok, measuring bang on for dates.  It's grown loads and measured 2.2mm


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## carrie lou

Juj, glad everything is OK   


With Zac my sickness didn't stop until the day he was born   but I was unlucky   


Well I've made an appointment with the midwife but she couldn't see me until 11th October - I will be nearly 9 weeks!!! But they've assured me this leaves plenty of time to get me in for my 12 week scan. Hmm, I hope so. It's not as if I've left this too late, I am 4+3 today for goodness sake   At this rate you'd have to book an appointment before you even know you're pregnant


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## juju81

Thanks carrie.  I was 8+3 with my midwife so you should be ok


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## Fizzypop

Carrie - I think I missed saying massive congrats, so chuffed for you xxx

Ju - the worry never goes away does it! X

Did you ladies tell work you were having ivf and/or get signed off while having treatment. I've been thinking more and more about what to do as the pressure of sneaking to appts is getting to me already!!!


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## carrie lou

Thanks Fizzy   Yes I was honest with my boss. I couldn't think of a plausible excuse why I would need time off at such short notice, and for me the travel time to my clinic was such that I had to take a whole day off every time.   Fortunately my boss was very understanding and supportive. I later discovered another lady in my office had IVF (now pregnant) so I guess she had experience of dealing with us IVF ladies   I know I am very lucky but for me it was a big weight off my mind having told her the truth and knowing I had her support. I didn't get signed off (didn't quite feel right as I wasn't actually sick) so had to use annual leave for all my appointments. When are you thinking of trying again?    


Juju, thanks I hope you are right - it's just that last time I saw my MW at 6 weeks and still had to chase and chase for my 12 week scan appointment - apparently the fax got lost or something   and I nearly missed my chance. Hopefully things will go smoother this time


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## juju81

Fizzy, I was honest with my work.  Like carrie, my clinic was 1.5 hrs away and managed to get arvo appointments so meant just taking the afternoon off.  My work gave me 10days.  I then matched it.  I used to take one of their days, then next appointment was a day from my flexi or shifting my working days around xxx


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## juju81

Oh no what happened there? You don't have to say!!  . Can you not request any local hospital near you?


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## ceci.bee

Carrie and Pinkcat just logged on after a few days and saw your BFPs!! yay so pleased for you both


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## juju81

Did you ever complain? Maybe have a word with yor midwife and tell her your concerns.  Must be a worry wen you know you have had a grotty time of it somewhere before


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

what happened Pinkcat? i thought you could have the baby at any hospital in the country?


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## juju81

I was gonna say that minx but thought it was just my PCT that offers that!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

it was on here that i read you can. But thinking about it i was asked which hospital i wanted, not, "you will go to....blah blah"


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## carrie lou

Aw Pinkcat that's horrible   I'm sure you've the right to choose your hospital though? I'd definitely look into that if I were you.   


Ceci thanks honey   Be you soon   


I booked an early scan today, for when I will be 7 weeks   Still seems so far away though


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## juju81

Yeah I was asked where I wanted to go!

Carrie, do u not get one as part of your treatment? I got a 6wk and a 8wk one included in the price of tx.  Not that we paid a penny this time round  . It will fly by.  Seriously, you won't have time to think.  I'm nearly 10 wks for flip sake.  It honestly feels like its flying!!


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## carrie lou

Ju, it's because I was egg sharing (which was pretty much free) the pregnancy scan is not included. It would have been £165 at my clinic plus train fares for me and DH, would have come to a total of nearly £300. Just couldn't justify the cost. So I've booked a private scan at a clinic just down the road for £99.


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## Fizzypop

I'm not an expert but I think there is a difference between maternity care and having the baby. You can have the baby in any hospital you want - my dh knew that from working for nhs and midwife told us which hospital we would go to but he challenged her and she admitted her boss tells her to tell people to make sure people still go there!!! However our antenatal care is done through the gp so I don't think we could choose that. Hope that makes sense...so I think you go with the flow for midwife and cons appts because that is to do with gp funding and then just rock up to the hospital you want to give birth at when the time comes. Unless of course rules have changed. 

I told my boss today. Had an appt this morning and ended up 40 mins late for work and crying in her office. Oops. Then she told me she had fertility problems too and "help" but not ivf. So now I feel a lot better


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

pinkcat said:


> I haven't booked with hospital/midwife yet. I tried to self refer to a different hospital than last time but they rejected me, and I'm annoyed that they didnt deign to write to me direct but only sent a letter to my doctor  I have booked to see my doctor about it after my scan when I will be over 9 weeks. I know it's leaving it late but I just can't face the conversation right now. I really didn't want to return to my local hospital but it doesn't look like I will have any choice unless I go private


There is a thing called ''patient choice'' and you can choose where you want to have treatment, don't let them fob you off.


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## abcdefgh

Hi,

It's been a little quiet on here. Hope everyone is well...

I'm now 11dpiui and the days are starting to drag! I have been feeling a little queasy in the last couple of days and have so far had no sign of the spotting I usually get a few days before AF is due... But I have enough experience of BFNs to realise that these 'symptoms' could be cruelly coincidental / entirely made up! And I'm well aware that a little positivity one day can easily come crashing down the next. So we'll see.

xx


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## hakunamatata

I hope its all good signs abc come on Bfp. 

I've been jabbing six days now, had first scan today. 3 follies with 1 lead at 14 so far. All good. 

Carrie don't think I had the chance to say a huge Congrats as was at Butlins. Well done sweetie, so very pleased! X 

Hello to all x


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## juju81

Abc, sending loads of   hun

Hak are you doing IUI or Ivf?

Carrie, how you doing? 

Pinkcat, have you been scanned yet?

Fizzy, have you started your monitoring cycle yet?

Amanda, hope your having a relaxing holiday.  Been thinking of you hun  

I'm ok, my backs gone.  Luckily not my SPD as I first suspected so I'm hoping once this little hung has moved out of my pelvis my back and pelvis pain with subside for a bit before I ultimately do get SPD.  Nicks of to Ibiza tomorrow on a stag do.  Can't say I'm very happy about it and the day he gets back my sister is leaving for Australia   am praying she hates it and comes back   she's going to miss the baby.  We're really close and its all really upsetting me at the mo  . Nausea has gone, tiredness still hovering but slowly I'm starting to feel more human.  Scan is in 2wks then I'm going to buy some bits.  Can't wait much longer


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## carrie lou

Abcd, fingers crossed for OTD   The wait is torture I know   


Hakuna, great news that you're getting started soon   


Ju, sorry to hear about you sister - is it a permanent move? I'm sure she will miss you just as much  


Fizzy, glad you feel better for having talked to your boss  


I'm doing OK, very tired but not much nausea as yet. I'm having trouble believing that I'm actually pregnant as I'm feeling so well so far, I'm sure I felt much sicker last time   Just hope everything is OK in there. I have my first scan in 2 weeks


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## juju81

Carrie she has a years visa then if permenant her work will need to sponsor her! My nausea stepped up at 7wks


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## hakunamatata

It's iui ju. X sorry you're having a hard time sweetie. 

Carrie hope the 2 weeks speeds up.


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## abcdefgh

Hakuna - Lots of luck for this cycle   

Ju - Sounds like you're having an emotional time  . Good that your nausea is going though.

Carrie - Hope the next two weeks go really quickly. x

AFM - Spotting today so I'm pretty sure my AF is on the way   . I should have known better than to think we would suddenly have the kind of luck for it to happen first time - as if! Anyway, I'm not too upset about not being pregnant - I certainly don't feel quite as desperate this time round - but I am angry that we've just chucked £1100 down the drain (and will probably see plenty more going that way in the coming months). So unfair that most people don't spent a cent on TTC.


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## juju81

Pinkcat, how did it go hun  

Abc, what was your test?  

Hak, when will insem be?

I'm feeling fab now.  No nausea, no back ache and no cramping.  Only 1.5wks left of pesseries too whooooooo hooooooo!


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## carrie lou

Pinkcat, twins?!?!? That's amazing news - I'll keep my fingers crossed that the smaller one catches up   You have all my sympathy on the nausea front - I was like that with Zac, barely kept anything down   I hope it passes soon for you, it's so debilitating.   

Juju, glad you are feeling well. I'm also looking forward to saying goodbye to the pessaries, 6 more weeks for me   

Abcd, was it definitely a BFN? I'm so sorry if so. And with you on the unfairness of it all. Most people save up money to spend on their children, we have to fork out thousands just to have any children in the first place. Even though I was egg sharing, we still had to pay for numerous train trips up to London for scans, £70-80 a time, then the cost of freezing and storing our embryos, and the FET itself - we are pretty much broke now. Just as well we kept all Zac's things cos at this rate we won't be able to afford anything new for this baby!   Sending you loads of hugs sweetie and I'm sure your time will come soon    

Amanda, if you're still reading, hope you are OK   

Hi to everyone else   

I think the nausea is starting to creep up on me, definitely not feeling quite myself this evening. DH is taking Zac to see the in-laws tomorrow so I might have a day on the sofa with a DVD  I have my MW appointment next week, looking forward to it.


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## abcdefgh

Congrats Pinkcat! That's exciting, though I understand why you must be anxious. Did they not say whether the small gestational sac was a worry? I hope that everything is well at the next scan   

Juju - glad you are feeling well and happy. Long may it last  

Carrie - Hope the nausea doesn't get too bad. Enjoy your sofa day!  

AFM - Yep, definite BFN. I haven't tested but AF is definitely here now so I don't need to. Never mind - we'll go again in a couple of weeks time. Depsite being very used to having one great big dose of bad news after another on this journey, I guess I still keep thinking 'we really deserve some luck by now' and really hoped it might work first time this time!   We have enough for about 5 goes of iui but it's so horrible to see those savings just disappear when there are all sorts of things the money would be very useful for!


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## juju81

Pinkcat    good news and more worry, did they seem concerned about the small sac     fingers and tes crossed its caught up by your next scan   


Abc hugs to you hun    I've said before I can only imagine how ****e a bfn is, hopefully you won't need to use 5 goes    


Carrie, how far are you? 6wks? Mine peaked and disappeared about a week ago.  I'm hoping its because the placenta has taken over. Lady at scan said that happens any when from 9-12wks.  Am 10.5    boobs still sore and tiredness still there slightly and my tummy is growing so all hopefully going in the right direction


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## carrie lou

Yep 6 weeks tomorrow Ju. This is about when the nausea started last time   
People told me it would get better around 12 weeks and I kept waiting and waiting for a vomit free day but for me it just didn't come


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## juju81

Hate to say it didnt for my sister 2nd time round.  I read somewhere that said if you had no sickness first time, you probably wouldn't second time round...if you had nausea first time, you probably would get it less or not at all but if you had really severe sickness first time round you are likely to get bad sickness again! Soz    


Now I am feeling fine, I wish in a way I still felt sick    Never happy lol


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

pink cat - I nearly said to you i reckon it was twins cos of your spotting. But didnt like to say    congrats     


ABC - sorry hun     


I'm knackered ............... Bye


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## JanaH

WOW Pinkcat congrats on the twins.


Hope everyone else is doing well.


AFM - well looks like AF has finally decided to say her face, I've been so bloated and uncomfortable. Had DH's 40th last Saturday luckily the rain stopped as the first people arrived was a bit worried. It turned out t be a really good evening, I was knackered the next day from doing all the catering. 


I need some help in making a decision... We are going to South Africa in December and I've been thinking about treatment. option 1 doing FET and plan the transfer for the Friday and we leave on the Sunday option 2 do IUI if AF behaves insemination would be a week before we fly or option 3 do nothing. My reasoning behind it all is that I would be in holiday mood and have family around to help look after Joseph and I can relax. It is a long flight as we stop over in Dubai.


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## amandaloo

Pinkcat .  Oh my goodness congrats twins eh ) you must have been shocked !! Isn't there always one twin smaller ? 

Jana- it depends on how you feel flying back if you get  pregnant ?? 

Carrie- thanks 

Abcde- I'm so sorry it's blooming horrible isn't it  so fed up know how you are feeling xxx big hugs xxx

Hi to other ladies sorry no long personals just waiting for coach to take to airport 

Afm- been feeling low which isn't like me needed a rest from here for a bit . Anyway just had a lovely week away in kos and feeling a bit better and ready for action !!
Afm-


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## carrie lou

Amanda, glad you enjoyed your holiday, big hugs to you    


Abcd   


Jana, if it was me I'd probably go for FET as success rate is higher - but the timing is a bit tight if you are flying two days later   I'd be worried if anything were to go wrong... Might be very stressful for you. I hope you come to a decision you're happy with   


AFM, I'm freaking out a little   The nausea hasn't really come to anything, I am 6+1 now and only feel queasy occasionally like when I don't eat or when I wake up. I'm sure I felt much worse with Zac. Also I'm eating like a horse - at this stage last time I was living on crisps and milk shakes   and not keeping much of them down! In fact if it wasn't for sore boobs and tiredness, I wouldn't know I was pregnant at all. Surely you can't be as sick as a dog in your first pregnancy and not at all in your second - I'm so worried it means things aren't as they should be, and it's still 9 days till my scan. I'm going to be totally     by then.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I didn't feel as sick with 2nd one. Feeling hungry is a big sign. And you said you are feeling sick anyway. I shouldn't worry.


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## JanaH

Carrie don't worry about the sickness, only 9 more days   


Amanda glad you had a lovely holiday and ready for action.



My FET will be a medicated cycle so can choose the ET day, and I've got a gynae in South Africa so not to worried if something going wrong. I'm just so desperate to try again. If I where to get pregnant I would be just over 5 weeks on our return so not far.


We are off to Mallorca next week for a weekend can't wait for some rest.


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## juju81

Carrie, every pregnancy is different.  This one is so different to nah, espesh my rage issues and hunger.  My hunger has subsided now that my nausea has.  As I said my nausea didnt really step up until week 7.  Don't speak to soon    


My sore boobs have come back today too after disappearing for a week or 2.   


Jana, sounds like you've decided to have FET.  Go with it I say


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## carrie lou

Jana, I had natural cycle FET and the actual date of ET was two days later than originally planned - but if they can guarantee what day it would be for you, then I say go for it   You will be on hols and chilled out for the 2ww.  


Thanks for the reassurance ladies... Yes the sickness may yet kick in and I'll probably be sorry I wanted it   Will try and relax until my scan.


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## juju81

Could you to bring it forward? I've had 3 scans though to be honest and even after your first scan you'll still be panicking.  I've got my 12 scan a week Thursday    then, I'm going to buy something


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## amandaloo

Jana- sounds like your edging to having FET   . As long as you will have no regrets then I'd go for it .    

Carrie - try not to worry   know its hard   you still have waves of sickness and surely not all pg are the same. I hope not anyway   mine wasn't that pleasant !!!

Juju- heck that's gone quick to your 12 week scan where does time go  

I've been thinking on holiday of a plan  that I'm going to do 2 more iuis before moving to ivf As I won't fit in an ivf before Christmas as they have a shut down for deep clean. Well that's the plan I'm hoping that it won't come to that!! 
Need to make a decision in next few data been invited to a hen do in lorete de mar on the 3rd oct for 4 nights !


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lorette de mar     good luck


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## My Son is My World

Hi Ladies
Sorry for the me post and for jumping on your thread but I was just wondering whether any of you could help at all. Our little prince is due anytime now and was conceived via ds due to my dp's azoospermia. Today I have been putting together an album on the computer of all my pregnant photos and I'm wanting to put a photo album together which includes these along with all of his scan photos which I can annotate and show him when he's older. Did any of you do anything similar and if so can you give me ideas? Also where is a good place to buy an album from?
Thanks   xx


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## carrie lou

Hi Emlore   Yes I did something similar. I got a scrapbook from WHSmiths, wrote his story in it (loosely based on the words from the DC Network's "My Story" book) then illustrated it with photos, scan pics, our donor's info from the Xytex website. For some pages I scanned in and used the pics from the DCN book. Zac loves his special book especially the photos of himself   I did it for his first birthday so we started him pretty young   I know other people have used websites where you can put together a book. It depends how much you want to spend I suppose and how home-made you want it to look. I think it's a lovely idea. Just use your imagination. Lovely to hear from you and I hope you are feeling well. I can't believe you are on the home stretch now, very exciting


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## juju81

Amanda, book it   nice long weekend on your own to chill  . I'm away that weekend too on a 30th at centre parcs.  Girls only.  Can't flipping wait.  Got a spa treatment booked too  . It's flown by to be honest. Gender scan in 4wks too  . You won't need Ivf hun  

Emlore, hiya


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## abcdefgh

Amanda - Glad you enjoyed your holiday and have a plan for treatment  

Jana - I think being on holiday for the 2ww sounds like a good idea  

Emlore - Welcome and congrats   . I have a one year old daughter but we haven't put together any kind of book yet   . We are definitely planning on doing something along the lines of what Carrie described but just haven't got round to it. Did you all start telling as early as one year old? I want to do it soon so that I'm kind of used to saying it myself before she properly understands or asks questions, ut just have nothing to show her as of yet!


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## juju81

Abc, no I started when Noah turned 2, he doesn't give a rats **** to be honest. Not sure if we shoul push it more but I can't force him to care. He's still young really! We've got him te my story book of the DCN network and he reads that!!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Emlore we use the dcn book too. We've read it to him since he was born so it's drip fed into him. He knows a donor gave us some sperm cos daddy's didn't work. We can drop it into conversation now. He was asking what the seeds were in the melon, so I described them as seeds just like the donor gave us to make baby Lucas.   I plan to make a book like carrie did. He could help me make it so it's special to him.


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## carrie lou

Abcd, we started telling at about a year old only because I wanted to get used to saying the words to him so that it wouldn't be a big difficult subject to broach. We started by reading My Story and then his home made book. We read it perhaps every other week. I can't say he is fascinated by it really, he likes the pictures of himself but beyond that it's just like reading any other book for him. The important thing at this age is just to get used to talking about it with them. They are still so young, they don't see it as a big deal. It's just laying the groundwork for when they are older and able to grasp the subject and start asking questions   


I have told Zac there's a baby growing in mummy's tummy   He talks about it but doesn't really get it yet. I wonder if this will lead to questions about where babies come from ...


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## abcdefgh

Thanks. Yeah, I also just want to get used to saying the words at this point, and to make sure it never seems like a big deal - I need to get off my lazy bum and get a book made! Will do it soon.

Carrie - That's sweet that you have told Zac


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## juju81

Carrie bless him.  Noah knows there's a baby brother or sister in my tummy.  He's a year older tho so does understand a bit more.  He's already told me he's going to help with getting me nappies and wipes for when I have to change the baby's bum   excellent, my own little helper ha ha


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## carrie lou

Aw that's lovely Ju   Zac keeps asking to "take the baby out" - think he imagines there's a sort of trap door he can take the baby out to play with it for a while then pop it back in when he's had enough


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## JanaH

I just had a call from the clinic.... no more treatment until I have had a laparoscopy and hysteroscopy done. The consultant also wants me to do Karotyping and a some other blood tests. I have to make an appointment to go and see my GP to get referred for the tests and operation. This whole fertility journey is killing me.


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## juju81

Oh no jana why? Because of the 2 chems? Big big hugs to you


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## JanaH

the 2 chemicals and the mmc in 2010. Just hope I can get this done on the NHS as we won't be able to afford all of this and more treatment. 


I booked an appointment with my GP for the 14th Oct.


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## amandaloo

Jana-     oh no    . You must be so frustrated and upset really sorry to hear that . I hope you can get it all done quickly its just so frustrating and stressful    . The only positive thing is that if your consultant thinks you need it you won't be wasting money on cycles that may fail   . Xxx


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## carrie lou

Oh Jana so sorry to hear you have another hurdle in your way   But Amanda is right it is better to do what the consultant says rather than potentially waste money on cycles that aren't going to work. Fingers crossed you can get the tests on the NHS and don't have to wait too long. Lots of hugs


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## abcdefgh

Jana   Hope you can get everything done quickly. I am no expert but I was googling recently about whether anyone ever got any NHS funding for trying for a second child, and I got the idea that you can usually have all necessary tests and investigations on the NHS, although very unlikely to get funded treatment. 

By the way, has anyone ever heard of people getting NHS funding for a second child? I know it's a long shot but thought I might contact my PCT just in case...


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## carrie lou

I've never heard of it Abcd, we were told categorically by our consultant who treated us for Zac that once we had a child there would be no more funding, full stop. I know Holly couldn't get funding because her DH had a child from a previous relationship, even though she had no children of her own yet. Which I find grossly unfair, but then this whole IF thing is unfair anyway. It's worth a shot though, just so you know for certain.


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## carrie lou

Btw have you thought of egg sharing? I did it and it cut the costs dramatically.


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## abcdefgh

Yeah, I know that people are refused funding in some cases because of children that don't even live with them or they hardly ever see   - it's completely unfair and ridiculous  . I just wondered if - at the other extreme - there may be some PCTs out there that would fund for a second child for couples like us that could never ever conceive naturally. I've never heard of it though and suppose it is very very unlikely... I don't think i'd be able to egg share (age 32 - nearly 33 - with a low AMH) but I guess it might be worth checking.


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## carrie lou

I egg shared at 32 - most clinics allow you up to 35. AMH requirements vary between clinics but at the Lister where I was treated they only want it to be over 5. Mine isn't very high either (7.7) but I managed to produce 10 eggs, so it's not the be all and end all.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Janah  

Abcd I know someone that has a child already and had funding for a 2nd child. Her first was natural with her ex and then she needed ivf with her partner cos he's got low sperm count.


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## abcdefgh

My AMH was around 5.6 I think nearly two years ago so who knows now - I'm scared to even have it re-tested to be honest! But I will maybe find out what the clinic's criteria are so I at least know whether it could be an option. 

MM - That's interesting... I wonder if it was because they didn't already have a child together, or if it was just purely on the basis of medical need.


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## juju81

My pct wouldn't even fund our first cycle.  Didnt fund for male infertility the bast*rds


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Think it was cos they didn't have a child together. She lives in bucks and if you look at the criteria for bucks it allows a child from another relationship. But other pcts dont allow it.


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## amandaloo

I booked the hen do !!! Going away on Thursday again !!


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## juju81

Go and let your hair down hun, child free   I'll join u but mines a 30th in centre parcs


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## juju81

Hey girlies, hope you're all ok  

I had my 12wk scan today.  Was amazing.  I can't believe it.  One perfect little baby measuring bang on.  In fact they have changed my due date by 2 days and have made me 12+5 instead of 12+3.  Nuchal translucency of only 1.1mm too which is lovely and low.  The baby look just like Noah did at the same scan  

Gender scan in 3 weeks time.  Excited a tad!

Off to centre parcs tomorrow.  A weekend of no children, no husbands and plenty of girlie chat!

Amanda, enjoy your hen wknd too hun


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## abcdefgh

That's great news Juju   . You can let yourself get a lot more excited now! Have a great weekend away. I had another IUI today -    I will join you in the BFP club soon. x


----------



## juju81

Thanks abcd,

Ooooh good luck, I'll keep everything crossed.  When is OTD?


----------



## abcdefgh

Officially the 20th but I never make it to OTD - AF is pretty regular and always arrives by about 14 days after ovulation. Going to try my very best to forget about it, not obsess and to not be too gutted if it doesn't work! We'll see how that goes though...


----------



## carrie lou

Congratulations Juju   I've promised myself if I make it to 12 week scan, I will relax and start enjoying it a bit   


Good luck Abcd  Fingers crossed for you


----------



## abcdefgh

How many weeks are you Carrie? How are you feeling? x


----------



## carrie lou

I'm 7+5 Abcd, and feeling really well, much better than I did with Zac. Most days get a bit of queasiness but nowhere near as bad as last time, and it soon passes and I haven't actually been sick. It's freaking me out a bit, the sickness was awful but in a funny way, also reassuring! Being pregnant and NOT chucking up all the time is a new thing for me    I am just so tired all the time, I'm tucked up in bed already. I had a scan this week that showed baby is measuring a bit small, which is worrying me, but we did see a lovely little heartbeat. So I am clinging to that until my next scan in 2 weeks


----------



## abcdefgh

Glad you are feeling well, Carrie  - I hope it just means you have had better luck this time. They do say that every pregnancy is completely different. I hope the small measurement is not too much of a concern  . Can they sometimes just be quite difficult to measure at that stage? I remember in my 7 week scan, they said she was a bit small at first and then she moved slightly, they measured again and it was fine. Great to see a heartbeat too. xx


----------



## carrie lou

I am hoping that's all it was Abcd - she did say my womb tilts backwards (in most people it tilts forwards) which can make it harder to see what is going on / get an accurate measurement. Apparently after you see a heartbeat the chances of a miscarriage go down dramatically, I just keep reminding myself of that


----------



## abcdefgh

I'm sure everything will be fine then, Carrie. Hope the wait to the next scan goes quickly xx

I was ill yesterday with a vomiting bug. I feel much better now but it's slightly worrying me that it could have affected my chances of this cycle working


----------



## carrie lou

I've had a terrible weekend. Ignore everything I said above. I am pretty sure I've miscarried my baby. Going to EPAU tomorrow morning but I don't expect good news     


Abcd, Zac has just done a big vomit at bedtime - usually heralds the start of a vomiting bug doing the rounds of our house. It must be going around at the moment. Just what I need right now.   But I'm sure it won't affect your chances for this cycle


----------



## hakunamatata

Carrie hun why do you think you're miscarrying? Oh the worry never ends. Big hugs sweetie.

Abc Congrats on being Pupo hope the bug passes quick, not fun. Just you concentrate on feeling well.  X x


----------



## carrie lou

Hak, I've been bleeding since Friday, heavy with clots and pain   And my symptoms (such as they were) are all gone. Now I understand why I didn't feel sick and why the baby was too small   I think I lost it last night because a big clot like thing came away (sorry if tmi)


----------



## hakunamatata

Oh Carrie that's awful hun, I do hope you are wrong. Hope Hubby is being supportive and you won't be on your own tomorrow.


----------



## abcdefgh

Oh no Carrie, I'm so sorry.     that there is some other explanation tomorrow.


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks girls but I don't think there is much hope   Yes DH is coming with me tomorrow.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Oh Carrie     I hope there is better news. It is possible to have a huge bleed and things to be OK. This game is never easy is it.


----------



## juju81

Carrie hun, I feel for you so much.  I know exactly what your feeling right now.  I knew in my heart I had/was miscarrying.  It's truly heartbreaking.  If ever you want to talk about how your feeling please pm me xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh no Carrie, sending big hugs xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you everyone. I've been crying on and off all weekend, now I just feel totally drained. In a funny way I just want to get the news tomorrow so I can know once and for all that it's over, and start to move on. If I can.   Will keep you updated.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie -    I'm really sorry   . I will hold out every hope I can for you that your wrong    . Look after yourselves


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hun so so so sorry to hear that                       sending you millions of hugs


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Big hugs carrie. Know exactly how you're feeling


----------



## JanaH

Carrie just saw your post so sorry for your loss, it's really hard. Take care of yourself


----------



## juju81

Carrie I've seen one of your other posts    massive huge hugs coming your way.  There are a few of us on this board who know exactly what you are going through.  These next few weeks will be so so hard and you will never forget but I believe you will be strong enough to try again.  Take some time to grieve hun.  How's your hubby? I know he's struggling with his own issues at the moment, I hope he can be a tower of strength for you at this hideous time


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you ladies. I'm just devastated, even though I was expecting the worst I still sobbed and sobbed when she said there was no baby there anymore    DH has been brilliant. He had to go to work this afternoon but my mum has been here with me. She also lost a baby at 8 weeks so knows what I'm going through. 


We have one more frostie and I will go back for that as soon as I'm ready. I just can't accept that I'll never have another child. I will keep going.


----------



## abcdefgh

Carrie    I feel terrible for you. Like so many others, I have also been there and it's so so tough. It must be hard for anyone having all that hope taken away, but even more so for us when we've been through so much pain already   Of course you will have another baby. I think it feels like it should be easier the second time round since we know what we're dealing with and have already had such a long hard journey the first time but unfortunately it doesn't seem to work like that. Glad your DH and mum are there for you. Take care. xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

So sorry carrie. You take care.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie - I'm so so sorry     . Life is so blooming unfair  . Lots of hugs xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Gutted for you Carrie                             you are having such a rough time this journey, you will get there in the end. I hope that DH is able to be supportive and you can get through this together. Thinking of you sweetie


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - I am so sorry for your loss. As many have said, we have been there and know how you are feeling. 

Beanie did not declare him/herself til 17 weeks and then I had to have surgery which was very risky with a fetus the size of 13 weeks, and a general anaesthetic, so at least you have been spared that (I know that it is no consolation - you just want your baby back - I know  )

The positives are that you still have a frostie waiting and you clearly are very good at getting pregnant. My consultant said to try and take the positives in that getting pregnant is very positive and you managed to sustain even a sick embryo for a number of weeks.

You also did not have two embryos put back, because the loss of this one may have jeopardised the other, so you still have another chance left from this cycle.

I was also told that if every woman had 4 pregnancies, on average every woman would experience miscarriage - so you are definitely not alone     

Don't give up, you will get there.
I hope nothing I have said has upset you and that you can take something positive away.


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you everyone. What would I do without FF, I have had more support here from people who don't even know my real name than I have from certain "friends" in real life. I'm truly humbled.   


Holly, don't worry, you haven't upset me. I thought myself that I am grateful not to have to have an ERPC or anything like that, but to let nature take its course. Also the fact that my frostie survived freezing, thawing and then implanted is encouraging, even if it didn't stick for long - if that one could do it, my remaining frostie can do it too.   And on the balance of probabilities, the third embie MUST be the good one, surely?   


I emailed the clinic this afternoon, they said I can do a FET after my next period. I know it may seem a bit soon but I think it will help me move forward if I have a plan. It's all so awful   But I will get strong again


----------



## juju81

Carrie, that's not too soon.  I miscarried mid April, had period mid may, had Noah's cycle with my mid June cycle so the same.  We went away for the wknd in between just to get away and 'have a break'


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

you will get strong again and you will move on hun.     Are you still in pain or is it over now? I ended up on codine cos the pain was so bad but like you didnt need medical management. 


A plan is a good way of dealing with it.


----------



## carrie lou

I've had very little pain Mini, just like period pain really, haven't needed any painkillers so far. Another thing to be grateful for. Still bleeding though, the nurse said she could see some blood still inside on the scan and to expect more clots and bleeding for a few more days.


----------



## JanaH

I had an ERPC and it was a  horrible experience.   Thinking of you Carrie     


Received my letter from the consultant and he wants me to have a laparoscopy and hysteroscopy as he thinks my endo might be back and then the karyotype bloods. I've got an appointment with my GP for next Monday to get a referral on the NHS. We got back late last night from our short break to Mallorca. We had really good weather, I'm still tired as J was so busy could not sit still for 5 min. Had a bit of a rough flight back as his ears hurt on the descent. Will have to figure something out for our flights in December. I need to start thinking of starting potty training, omw thats a whole different chapter...


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie I also had an ERPC and it was horrible - mother nature while cruel is gentler than a surgeon. You are right I am sure about the stats for the last embie - FET/IVF these days has 50-60% success, so one embie was a BFN, one implanted but sadly left you   , so the chances of the third being the good one are really high          plus the chances of getting pg after a loss are supposed to be higher as your lining is really primed and ready. I will keep everything             for your onward plan as that is the best way to get through this, but give yourself (hard I know with a toddler) time to recover physically and emotionally                     

Janah - we have just finished PT and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be - the key I think is to wait until they are ready and they pick it up really quickly - also doing it when there is not much change going on, and nursery are on board is also really important I think. Joshi's nursery get everyone going to the loo after the age of 2 whatever happens so they can all copy and learn off each other, and it really helped a lot - he was dry at nursery before he was dry at home. We also gave him the option every day of choosing nappies or pants, and that meant he was in charge so could ask for pants when he felt confident about it, and we used that as a barometer for asking him to use the potty/loo. Good luck with that and your next op - if that is the reason behind why your recent cycles haven't worked out, then hope it can sort it out for you both                

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ceci well done on the PT. we did exactly how you did it. Nursery did the same too.


----------



## juju81

Carrie how u doing chick?  

Pinkcat, good luck for Tuesday, I'm sure everything will be fine  

Hak, how u doing hun? Did you test  

Amanda, how's you hun? Hen wknd pics look lush  

Janah, how r u lovely? Your holiday snaps look nice too  

Hope nobody minds me updating you, I got my blood results today and am classed as low risk with a 1:5585 risk.  Am happy with that.  2 weeks until gender scan


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies

Pinkcat- good luck for Tuesday  

Hak - any news ? 

Juju- hen do was great I'm bloomin exhausted though its taken me a week to recover lol getting too old  . Really pleased all is going well with you 
Bet your having a little boy  

Carrie- thinking about you xx

Mini - how you doing ?

Jana- good luck with pt . I've been doing it for some time now ds does most of his number 1's and 2's on the loo now but haven't progressed to no nappy yet . Hope your appts go well sorry there's so much you have to go through to start again  

Afm- started ov testing again think it will be early this week when I have iui  . I feel so much better for a break the two holidays have helped ! Time with girls also great ) . Anyway feel ready to tackle it all over again .


----------



## hakunamatata

Glad you're feeling better Amanda, some down time was just what you needed!

Janah hope they can get your tests done soon, at least they are checking into things before you go again. 
Pinkcat good luck for tues x 
Carrie hope you're doing ok, I think of you often. I really hope my news is ok. I got a Bfp on tues, just didn't want to upset you any more than nec. Hcg was 669 on day 15 so we pray its a strongun.


----------



## amandaloo

Hak -         brilliant news xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

well done Hak


----------



## carrie lou

Congratulations Hakuna     Course you haven't upset me, you have had your fair share of heartache and deserve some good news. I'm thrilled for you   


Amanda, glad you are feeling better, best of luck for this week   


I'm doing ok, still sad but seeing consultant on Wed to discuss FET. Hopefully after my next period.


----------



## juju81

Well done Hak   

Amanda, holidays are good for the soul! Good luck for this cycle hun x


----------



## abcdefgh

Hakuna - I totally missed that you were having treatment   . Congratulations! Delighted for you.   xx

Carrie - Thinking of you. Hope thimgs go well on Wednesday   xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - fab news


----------



## ceci.bee

Hakuna so so happy for you        that's a great hcg fingers all crossed for you hun

Carrie hun             

Amanda and pinkcat                 

Janah how did the appointment go?                they can sort you out sweetie

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Ceci, won't be long until your back.  Is it march?


----------



## ceci.bee

Mid feb Ju    4 months today infact - and already thinking about booking an appointment at our clinic as I am so broody! 

xx


----------



## abcdefgh

Ceci - That's exciting. Good luck when the time comes!

I'm pretty sure it's another BFN for me   . No great surprise but I was naively hoping we would have an easier time of it this time around and I might have been lucky enough to conceive quickly   . Oh well, going to do another one straight away but this time take clomid. It's unlikely to make much difference in reality but it feels better to be making a change


----------



## carrie lou

Abcd, clomid does improve your chances (I conceived Zac on clomid). I think it's about 5% better odds so definitely worth a try I think. Best of luck Hun   


Feeling so sad tonight. We had a family meal out yesterday for my dad's birthday. All my immediate family know about my miscarriage but not one of them mentioned it or even asked me if I was ok. And my (ex) best friend, 6 months pregnant, is posting all over ** about her baby. She hasn't spoken to me for nearly 5 months. I just feel so alone right now and angry with life


----------



## abcdefgh

Carrie. I was similarly very angry and sad after my miscarriage. It really is a horribly hard thing to go through  . Just let yourself feel whatever you need to feel for now though. It's important to grieve properly, but you will get stronger and happiness will return.


----------



## carrie lou

Sorry for bringing the thread down. I just feel so low at the moment


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

You're not bringing it down hun. Delete your ex friend


----------



## abcdefgh

Don't be silly, Carrie. This is what FF is for. You need a place where you can vent and be completely honest about your feelings to people who understand what you are going through. Unfortunately few of us get that in the real world (as what you've just posted proves  ) but we can support each other on here. Big hugs.


----------



## juju81

Carrie i found unfortunately people in the real world Probably dont know what to say.  Maybe they didnt want to ask incase you didn't want to talk about it iykwim.  Don't be so hard on yourself, it hasn't been long and you emotions will be all over the place   I still get sad about my little bean I lost.  I think about it and my due date all the time.  Just in time it does get slightly easier.    it's no consolation at all but I would say the majority of us on this board have suffered a miscarriage and we can totally relate to how your feeling so please don't hide away  

Abcd, I've conceived all 3 times with clomid.  And anyway, it's not over yet hun   when is OTD?

Ceci, defo get an appointment booked.  Do you have a wait for consultations? Exciting stuff.  Will it be Fet, Ivf or IUI? I can't see your signature when replying   

Hello to everyone else


----------



## hakunamatata

Carrie vent vent vent. Unfort miscarriage still very taboo. You're doing fabulous honey I remember the dark days but the pain heals. We are all here for you. 

Oh Ceci  not long now. 

Abc you just don't know its so hard to read. I took gonal f with mine x 

Holly how you feeling how many weeks are you now. How you coping with work pregnancy and little one? X


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hun         I went through the same thing with my MC - not a single person asked me about it or how I was doing - I think it is because most people have no idea what to say and if they do they come out with stupid things like 'at least you did get pg' or 'this one was not meant to be' and so they stay schtum - it is a taboo thing stupidly, as 1-2/5 pg end in MC, so most women do go through it at some point or another. I am not surprised you are low, you are still full of hormones and are grieving, it is a really really horrible thing to go through. I found I felt physically better after the next AF after the loss, but it took ages for my mood to lift. My Gp referred me to their MC/loss counselling service and that was helpful, especially if DH can't be as supportive as you would like with his depression. masses of                coming your way, and stay off ** (and agree with Min, delete your ex-friend)     baby and bump pics on ** are not what you need right now

ABC               so sorry you think you might have another BFN sending big hugs and go for the clomid if it will up your chances

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Fab news Pinkcat, what a relief   you must only be a couple of weeks behind me? I'm due the 12/4?  I've got my gender scan next Saturday. Will you the sexes a surprise?


----------



## juju81

Just looked and you exactly 2wks behind.  Could potentially hve them around the same time if your expecting twinnies


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies 

Carrie - I'm so sorry . It is very difficult to talk to ppl about mc and think like others have said that may be why ppl have not mentioned it . Don't get me wrong I've spoken to ppl about it when they have had a mc as my friends have had them but think because if the whole infertility thing and what we have been through I sort of understand more even though I've not experienced it myself . I think it's great you have a plan to focus on and slowly over time you will start to feel better    even though you will never forget  . Take care of yourself xx

Pinkcat- great news about the scan well chuffed for you  

Afm- still testing for ov at moment hopefully won't be long before iui


----------



## hakunamatata

Excellent news pinkcat, what was your hcg I'm a little scared!

Hope you're not waiting long Amanda x


----------



## juju81

Fab news Amanda, keeping everything crossed for this cycle  

Hak, when is your scan?


----------



## juju81

Could be identical Hak    Are you taking cyclogest?




Pinkcat, are you having the combined screening done? It's nice to have a bump buddy.  My old bump buddy Paws18 (I think she's coming back    ) and I ended up having the babies the same day    My (.)(.) have suddenly sprouted about 2 sizes    Exciting times.  Does Josh understand? Noah can't wait, told me to call the baby George the other day and apparently the baby doesn't need his/her own room because it can share his bed   


I'm in contact with cupcake, she often asks how everyone is, I keep her updated.  She sends love and hugs to you all xx


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, hope Cupcake is well. Does she have any plans for another baby? 


I have had to try and explain to Zac that the baby isn't growing in mummy's tummy anymore   Don't think he gets it really but he helped light our candle last night and I told him it was to say goodbye to the baby because it wasn't strong enough and isn't coming anymore   

Saw the consultant today. He mentioned clotting tests he could do but there isn't much evidence for them after only one mc, and they are expensive, so he doesn't recommend them at this stage. Also the fact that I have had one healthy baby suggests it was a problem with the embryo, not a problem with me. I can go ahead with FET after my next period. He was very positive about the prospects. So I am feeling a bit better now. Just hope AF shows up before the end of November otherwise I'll have to wait until after Christmas... But I'm sure it won't be that long


----------



## juju81

Carrie, we'd told my niece that I was pregnant then had to tell her the baby was poorly and had gone to live in the clouds! She was slightly older though.  Even now she still remembers it though      I'm proof you can go onto have a healthy preg after a miscarriage so    it's just a one off for you   


She mentioned that her and her hubby had spoken about possible tx next year but she just wants to enjoy her little one for a bit longer and the thought of tx makes her sweat! Totally understand where she's coming from.  Hopefully she'll have another one.  Her little girl is beautiful


----------



## hakunamatata

Yep on cyclogest, been feeling very sick, do now! Guess only time will tell scan is 4th. X 

Carrie must be really hard for zac. He will get to be a big brother x


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi. Hope everyone is well. 

Just a quick update... I'm now 15dpiui and there's no sign of my period starting properly   (I had a tiny bit of brown spotting on Monday, which I took to be the start of the build up to AF as that's what usually happens, but nothing since which is unusual). I'm trying really hard not to get my hopes up because I have absolutely no symptoms and don't want to set myself up for a huge disappointment, but it's hard. Could the fact that I was ill for a couple of days just after iui have delayed my period? Or would that only delay ovulation? I'm far too scared to do a test so I'm just waiting very nervously and knicker watching like mad


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

TEST!


----------



## amandaloo

Hi - on way to have iui on my bday lol typical ! Ov late this month bit worried about that but can feel ov pain at moment which must be a good thing x


----------



## amandaloo

Erm missed abcde post --- test what are you waiting for !!


----------



## juju81

Abcd.  Wtf.  Test! Brown spotting sounds like implantation


----------



## juju81

Amanda, good luck Hun, so hope this is your turn xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Happy b-day Amanda - hope all goes well today!

ABC, I had spotting this time when embryo day 12 old......test!


----------



## abcdefgh

I hate testing - get so nervous and seeing a bfn is so depressing. May do one tonight or tomorrow morning though...

Amanda - don't think ovulating late matters at all - as long as you ovulate and iui is timed to coincide. Good luck  Xx


----------



## carrie lou

Abcd - test!!!  I know what you mean about it being depressing but it sounds really promising.... Fingers crossed for you   I had a tiny bit of spotting on day 12/13 with Zac.   


Amanda, all the best, hope this is your time    And happy birthday


----------



## juju81

Abcd, what's the difference between now and tomorrow? TEST   my nerves can't take it!!


----------



## abcdefgh

You managed to persuade me... Two clear lines on a first response - eek


----------



## hakunamatata

Omg Omg abc a bfp, when is official test day?

Good luck Amanda and happy birthday, let's hope its a lucky one, you deserve it. X


----------



## juju81

Oh my god!  Congratulations ABCD that is fab news.....praying for A healthy 8months for you my lovely xx


----------



## juju81

Two under 2


----------



## abcdefgh

Thank you. I'm completely in shock   . It didn't really occur to me until late yesterday that it might be a possibility at all. Just hope everything works out - I've a long way to go. 

Hakuna - what is your rough due date? x

Amanda - hope everything went well today and that you have a good time tonight celebrating your bday. x


----------



## carrie lou

Congrats Abcd - wonderful news   Hopefully we will have another run of BFPs now... Hakuna, you - next it will be Amanda and me    


I can't believe this... It's 2 weeks today since my mc started, and I am getting ovulation pains   I might be having FET sooner than I thought


----------



## abcdefgh

Great news Carrie. I have everything crossed for you. Can't wait to be celebrating yours and Amanda's BFPs very soon


----------



## hakunamatata

As long as you're ready carrie, big hugs.

It's worked out as 14th of June Abc but if i get gestational diabetes again i will have a c section at 38 weeks. X


----------



## amandaloo

Abcde- yayyyyyyyy that's fantastic news yessssssss yessssssss yessssssss I'm well pleased for you can't believe you didn't think it ha ha !!


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- I hope so ) fingers crossed eh . X hope you can start soon x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

ABC


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Congrats abc    



juju81 said:


> Two under 2


   

Abc don't listen to ju! The first couple of months was hell but we survived


----------



## juju81

♥ Mighty Mini ♥ said:


> Congrats abc
> 
> 
> 
> juju81 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Two under 2
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Abc don't listen to ju! The first couple of months was hell but we survived
Click to expand...

Ha ha I'm only jesting! Everyone copes in the end whatever the age gap  that's what I keep telling myself anyway


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

The medication helps


----------



## juju81

Pmsl!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## abcdefgh

I know, I've been trying to convince my DH that a smallish age gap is good but I'm not so sure myself!     But like Juju said, there are pros and cons of any age gap and I count myself very lucky to be having (   that everything works out) another baby at all considering where we were a couple of years ago.

Have phoned the clinic and booked my scan for 8th Nov. I can't remember when I'm supposed to get in touch with my GP. I think I did it before the 7 week scan last time - does that sound right? Or do I wait?


----------



## juju81

Totes agree ABCD, would never have thought I'd be in this position 5yrs ago!  I got quite a bit excited this morning about having a newborn again.  I pinch myself some days.  

I spoke to my doc just after 4wks.  It helped actually as I got my midwife appoints through quite quick whereas with Noah all my appoints/scans were quite late!

I've been starting to feel a lot more movement.  My headaches are still lingering but I hate had a migraine for a week now   

Anyone else mega excited for Christmas this year. Noah's 3.5 now and really understands this year.  I can't flipping wait


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

You don't need to contact the GP at all in our area now as you self refer to the midwife on the hospital website and they get in contact with you.

I did see the GP this time because of the bleeding and also to get my cyclogest and progynova - they have been willing to prescribe for me once I am actually pregnant and it saves some money if you are just paying a prescription charge - even better if you can persuade them to give you the FW8 so you can get prescription exemption.


----------



## juju81

Holly I got my cyclogest on prescription without my maternity exemption card.  I got the paperwork when I went but obviously didn't have my card for the pharmacist and they allowed me to have it free.  I just told them I was preg and didn't have my card through.  They just said "yeah that's fine"   

How r things with DH? Is there any sign of improvement? Will he be at the birth? I don't know how you can live in a relationship   You deserve happiness too


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks. I think I will try and get a docs appointment tomorrow then and get the ball rolling. I don't need any prescriptions, though, as it was a completely natural cycle. 

Hope everyone has had lovely weekends. xx


----------



## amandaloo

Abcde- you've just given me hope my iui are natural too . X


----------



## abcdefgh

Amanda - Yes, they definitely can work   . I've also had a lot of BFNs but I think I had pretty bad luck the first time round. In total I've had nine cycles and three BFPs so all in all that's not bad I guess. I found the lack of knowledge / control hard but on the plus side the treatment was so easy and hasn't even invloved time off work. Good luck    - really really hope it's your time. When is OTD?


----------



## amandaloo

Abcdef- 1st nov . But bit of a weird cycle this one so as ov was late so otd is well after when I'd get my af normally . Maybe I'd have started late this cycle . Your results have been good haven't they


----------



## juju81

Amanda apparently your af comes 14days after ov so it just means your af will be later.  If thy makes sense??


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

She won't be having AF!  

Ju - no, had a blazing row with DH before I left to go to Dad's yesterday.
I asked him if he had remembered to sort out the MOT for my car due in a couple of weeks and he said no what are YOU going to do about it as it is YOUR car. FFS. I was livid.     

He said years ago that he would look after the cars and I could look after everything else. I told him that was bloody unfair at the time, and now he does not even want to look after my car either. I asked him about the logistics of getting my car to a garage with a little one in a car seat and that getting a taxi back was not really acceptable with a toddler.

He said he would take it to a dealer. Thanks mate - bloody expensive and no doubt hand me the bill. Then he said it will cost a fortune as the airbag light is on and it won't pass. And I need a bigger car. (which I don't).

I asked him where he thought the money for a new car was coming from since I pay all the bills and have no money left at all, that I can barely cover the gas bill and I am about to be on mat leave with hardly any income after 2 months. And when I go back to work I will have 2 children to pay childcare for.

I was fuming. I told him it was bloody unfair of him to expect me to pay all the bills for 5 years while he lives here scot free and does his own thing including buying his son a car for his 18th, running 2 landrovers and going on holiday every other weekend. 
He just told me life isn't fair. Oh I was livid.


----------



## Wraakgodin

Oh Mistletoe, just wanted to send you the hugest cyberhug.  You deserve better hun.  You deserve someone that treats you with love and respect.  I hate to see you go through this, on top of everything else.  

Sending lots of love and hugs your way.

Sue


----------



## hakunamatata

Don't know how you do it hun. You're so stronf but should get the support you so deserve.


----------



## juju81

Why put up with it any longer? He contributes nothing.  I know your worried about the money side (you've mentioned before about not wanting him to get his hands on it but seriously, get him out your life.  Think of your babies.  He's not interested in them and they will remember when they are older.  Sometimes happiness is worth more than pennies


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly   kick him to the kurb


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- I don't know how you do it you can't be happy with him :-( .   . Hope your ok must be very hard for you

Juju- thanks I didn't really realise that I've never really tracked my cycles to this degree before . I obviously did ov tests when we tried naturally many moons ago ! but that's about it.


----------



## abcdefgh

Mistletoe   Hope you find a way of sorting things out one way or another. It certainly doesn't like a sustainable situation and not good for you or the kids. 

Amanda - Hope the 2ww is not proving too tortuous. Keeping everything crossed for you. x

Hope everyone else is ok.

AFM - Went to the docs yesterday and realised I hadn't been taking folic acid. Ooooops   Can't believe I forgot. Hopefully it won't be a problem but I feel a bit stupid. I still don't have any symptoms whatsoever but I'm not even 5 weeks so I'm not panicking about it yet!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Dont worry. I obviously didn't cos I didn't know I was pg and he's fine.


----------



## amandaloo

Abcdef- wouldn't worry there will be lots of ppl in the same boat 

2ww - equals bloomin hard ! I'm ok when at wrk its when I sit down at home uhh


----------



## shelleysugar

Holly - just wanted to send you a big cyber      
Great advice on here  
Take care x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Shelly have you something you'd like to share


----------



## shelleysugar

Maybe...!
Oh you mean a rather lovely BFP.  I'm flabbergasted!!!!
Xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yes that!!      Well done. I knew it would be this time


----------



## hakunamatata

Yay Congrats x


----------



## carrie lou

Welcome Shelly lovely


----------



## juju81

Yay, shelleys over here   I saw your post here before I saw it on the donor board and so quickly went over there!! Fab news, over the moon for you x


----------



## abcdefgh

Congrats Shelley and welcome!  

Hakuna - How are you feeling?

Carrie   Hope you're doing ok.

Juju - Is tomorrow your scan? Can't wait to hear your news! 

I'm 5+1 today and still no symptoms. But I did a clearblue digital test this morning and 3+ came up straight away so that's very reassuring.


----------



## amandaloo

Shelley- hello welcome to the board . And CONGRATULATIONS on your BFP .  

Juju- good luck today


----------



## juju81

Shelley, I read your diary last night   defo twins hun   

Amanda, cheers love

Yep scan this morning.  I'm so excited.  It's at half 10.  Will keep you posted.  I'm thinking another boy


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## juju81

Just had my scan.  It's a lovely little girl.  My little Noah wanted a sister.  She had a lovely little button nose too


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

You're in team pink, just like me......How exciting ......


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- wow I was convinced you were having a boy !! Great news xx


----------



## shelleysugar

Congratulations Juju - so happy for you      xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

Wow Ju Congrats, what a surprise x


----------



## juju81

I know. I was convinced it was a boy.  She said oh I think I know what it is already so thought boy then she said its there's 3 white lines (how they tell its a girl) and I just said "oh my god". I was so shocked.  Then I started getting emotional    I went and bought some girlie outfits earlier.  Need a name now!


----------



## hakunamatata

Oh girlie outfits are so much fun. X enjoy every second


----------



## amandaloo

Juju - exciting what are you thinking About any ideas ? 

I am now 8pdiui uhhh the 2 ww . I've had a few symptoms but I won't believe anything any more as I've had them all before and negative , I've had waves of sickness little brown spotting 5dpiui . I'm now feeling like af is coming   which is normal for me a week before af . I don't know what to think anymore .


----------



## abcdefgh

Great news Juju! How exciting for you all   x

Amanda - So hard, isn't it?   But I think it's really impossible to tell at this stage, although brown spotting sounds promising if that's not normal for you. Hope the next few days go quickly and you can do some nice things to take your mind off it.


----------



## amandaloo

Abcde- yes I've had spotting once in 2 ww was still negative so that's not unusual either . I know it's hard . It's not gone as slow this time so far . Been busy at work and I'm out all day tomorrow and planning to keep occupied next week . How are you feeling?


----------



## juju81

Oh Amanda,      it's definately your turn hun    when is OTD?  We've a couple of names.  Keeping them quiet tho.  Will be a first for me


----------



## abcdefgh

I'm feeling absolutely fine. No symptoms at all, honestly  . I'm trying not to worry though, as HPTs are showing progress so I will presume all is well. Scan is less than 2 weeks away now. x


----------



## abcdefgh

There are so many lovely girls names! I really struggle with thinking of good ones for boys though.


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- thanks   I will get there in the end no matter what it takes     it's 1st nov . It's nice to have a surprise ill look forward to hearing the name then !!

Abcde- glad your ok some ppl just don't have symptoms . My friend never once felt sick and has had 2 very smooth pg . X


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

All very exciting Juju.
I went to a nearly new sale today and got a big bag of girls clothes all in all cost me about £10. I've also been collecting from the donation table at the children's centre and charity shops. 
I love pink and whit cotton things with cutsie bunnies, mice and kittens etc on them.

Got a few friends with girls and they are offering me stuff too. I will be innundated - not even got rid of anything from C yet either.

I think I have SPD.   Had pain in the night and woke up with severe pain all under my right top of the leg and radiating around the pelvis. Bloody hard to get up out of a chair today let alone bend down to pick stuff up or lift C.

Baby being breech is also not comfortable. Her head is under my ribs and all the kicks are directed onto my bladder. She feels like she is dancing a jig on my bladder today and getting up to go to the loo is not easy with pelvic pain. 

I hope it is better tomorrow. 10 weeks left til my section. So it had better.
Hope it is OK to moan moan moan on here. Please believe me when I say I am totally thrilled and amazingly grateful and excited to be pregnant, but it does not make the discomforts less.


----------



## juju81

Holly I had SPD with Noah.  Totally sympathise.  I've been warned its pretty guaranteed ill get it this time too.  Try and do things with your legs together.  Ie in and out of the car.  In and out of the bath.  Try not to squat.  Your hubby might have to pull his finger out his ar$e hole and actually help you do the washing, hoovering etc.  unfortunately it won't go until baby is here.  I still get pains now (well before I was preg).  Noah's bum was stuck in my ribs.  I used to have to push it down. He'd move around and then go straight back again   


Amanda, I love how strong you are.  I would have crumpled    your turn will definately come    


Abcd, my symptoms didnt kick in until about 6wks


----------



## hakunamatata

Amanda with that determination you will get there hun. The 2ww is a breading ground for insecurity so youre doing so well.

Abc early days hey. We are never happy hey, there's me feeling extremely sick from early and still worried. 4 of my local friends are pg, one due the day before me, gosh it crossed my mind something could go wrong, hadn't considered it this time with feeling so ill. Roll on 4th.

Holly you Defo have my sympathises Like Ju I had sod and expect if again tho I'm hoping it hrlps I'm 1ì pounds lighter this time. 

I'm wondering when they'll get around to testing diabetes. Booking in not even till 14th nov (9 3) 

What a grim day it is today. Hubby got Addi so might take advantage and snooze a bit more x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly when is you due date?

Abc I had no symptoms until 6 wks

Ju you've got girly hormones to content to now  

Amanda  

Flaming clocks going back does not mix with children


----------



## juju81

Hak, I'm also 1.5stone lighter.  Unfortunately I don't think weight has much bearing It's the pits.  I've had a few twinges already,  I had it with Noah at 25wks and they say you get it earlier    


I picked the lie in yesterday not even bloody thinking, grrrrr Noah was up at 5.30 so still 6.30 to him


----------



## amandaloo

Hope all you lovely ladies don't get it again sounds painful 

I've been up since 6 too


----------



## abcdefgh

Poor you, Mistletoe - hope the pain eases. Ju and Hakuna - hope you don't suffer too much this time either. Sounds horrible  

Yes, we had same problem with clock change  . I'm shattered today - or maybe that's a symptom starting to kick in!


----------



## juju81

Abc, u need a ticker.  How far are you? My tiredness kicke in before I'd tested.  I spent up until about 10wks going to bed at 8 and having an afternoon snooze. You forget how tired you get.  Throw in a toddler (yours is even younger then Noah was   ) and its even harder.  Is your little one still having day sleeps?


----------



## abcdefgh

I'm only 5+3. I think the only real symptom I had by this point last time was sore boobs but they don't hurt at all this time - but maybe that's because they've stretched once before  . I wasn't even particularly tired last time but having a toddler probably does make a lot of difference! She still has day time naps but rarely sleeps for more than 30-40 mins at a time and often that's in the car / pushchair when we're out and about. x


----------



## juju81

Just rest a bit if u can during the day.  I live in a bungalow and Noah now plays quite nicely on his own or a bit so it was easy for me to just lie on my bed during the day.  Not sleeping, unless nick was home or had taken him out but just resting.  He could understand more tho.  I have to say I wouldn't have got through those first months without Nick.  He literally took over and did everything.  Apart from when he buggered off to Ibiza for a wk!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

ABC your LO is the same age as my DS1 was when i fell pg. I'm not going to lie, it was hard but you get through it. Once 12 weeks passes you will feel better. Your 2nd pg is so different cos you can't sit down al the time and you might have to get up in night for DD1 and once baby is here there is no sitting watching soaps while you feed, its feed and move, feed and move feed and move         but you get into a routine and it all falls into place.


I have started telling a few more people about our donor. Ok only 1 at the mo, but have plans for more!!    but i figured i know new people now and some are good friends so i thought  they should know and also he's going to be talking about it once he goes to school which is next year so thought i would give the heads up to a few people in case he announces over a tea party!!


----------



## northernmonkey

Wow, so many BFP announcements! Fab news ladies - am so pleased for you all and slightly envious! Definitely no more tx for me but I do feel sad that I'll never have a bump again. 

Amanda - don't lose hope yet.  All my bfp's came when I least expected them so stay positive    

Holly - can't believe you only have 10 weeks to go. Do you have a date for your section? 

Juju - yay, team pink!!! Girls are fab, if I'd gone for number 4 I would have been more than happy with another girlie (I might not say that when they're all teenagers and pinching each others clothes ands make up ha ha) 

Carrie - really sorry to read your news. Take it easy and look after yourself.  

Mini - how did your friend react when you told her? I've wondered recently whether I should tell a close friend of mine but I don't think dh would feel comfortable about it.  I've been reminding him for ages that dd#1 is getting older and will probably start talking to friends about it soon, but last week I was talking about her My Story book (which I've been reading to her for years) and it turns out she hadn't realised it was a (in her words) true story   Still not sure how much she really gets it now!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ahh bless her. My friend was fine. She said it really didn't matter. In fact she said someone she knows is having to use a donor too. We had a laugh about the donor and the fact we put his sperm
In the shopping trolley when we ordered it!!


----------



## carrie lou

Thy funniest thing I remember is DH's concern over how it was going to appear on his credit card statement   Xytex assured him they are very discrete   You girls are brave telling other people... The only ones who know so far are our immediate family and I think sometimes even they forget - either that or are too embarrassed to mention it   I did tell one close friend but she was a bit weird about it so I stopped bringing it up.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No I knew she'd be ok. If they don't understand then that's there problem.


----------



## northernmonkey

No I won't tell this particular friend until I'm absolutely sure, but she's the only person I can imagine discussing it with.  She's a really good friend and I almost feel as though I'm hiding something from her if that makes sense.  I just want to feel comfortable talking about it because I don't want the girls to sense any embarrassment.  What I do dread is when any of the girls talk about it at school and I start being quizzed - I know exactly which mums will be asking out of nosiness ...


----------



## juju81

We talk openly about it.  You'd be surprised how many people say "oh my sister in law had problems and use donor egg or my brother in law couldn't have children" etc etc.  other people ave a lot of respect for nick and the way he's dealt with it.  Then you would also be surprised how many people forget anyway!  I've always spoken quite open about our struggles with ttc anyway.  I get lots of people commenting on the bond nick and Noah have too  

I told everyone at work today were expecting a girl.  They were all really shocked and chuffed too because I convinced them that I thought it was another boy


----------



## carrie lou

I really admire you for that Ju. Unfortunately my DH is nowhere near as open and it was a battle to convince him to let me tell my mum at first   Also I think I've been put off by my one bad experience. My friend said some really stupid things like "well you could always borrow my DH for the weekend you know" and "why don't you just have it off with the postman"   Maybe trying to defuse the situation with humour, but I didn't think it was the most sensitive way of handling things. And when I was telling her about choosing and buying the sperm: "god, there are easier ways to make a baby you know". Oh really? Like what, a one night stand?   And the final straw was when she tried to convince me not to tell Zac about the donor because "there's no point". If people can't be supportive then I'd rather they weren't involved


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I agree Carrie.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I am quite open about using a donor to close friends. DH does not know - but then he's not much involved anyway or talking about it, so I feel I need the support.
It also explains to people in a simple way why he is so distant about his children as otherwise they think he is really really weird.

I've had a strange day. Tried to get to work and gave up, but was stranded for about 2 hours with C in buggy.
Felt sick and has tummy upset for 24 hours with abdominal cramps. Not interested in drinking or eating, so at my antenatal appoinment this pm I handed in very concentrated pee in a pot   and it had 2+ ketones in it and I was told off for not eating or drinking something.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Naughty girl


----------



## amandaloo

Mistletoe- you have had a real day then    hope you feel better tomorrow  

It was hard for my dh at first but over the years he's chilled a little about telling people . Most of our close friends know now . I started reading My Story to DS and I cried first three times I read it . I'm getting used to it a bit more now . First time I opened it to look at it I cried too  .


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Oh and they are worried about my low placenta - been told if I get any bleeding at all to go straight to hospital and if still low at the 33 weeks scan they might decide to bring my section forward to even sooner than 3rd Jan. So could be a Christmas baby.


----------



## abcdefgh

Mini - Hmm, sounds like fun!   I'm kind of in denial at the moment about the fact I'm going to have 2 very young children to deal with at once but I will probably be coming to you for advice once the panic sets in! 

It's great that you talk openly about it all Juju - definitely the best thing for Noah (and bumpette) in the long run. We have only told a handful of people and my DH would prefer it stays like that but it's obviously possible that DD will tell people herself in the future and we need to be fine with that as we can't have her thinking it's something to be ashamed of. 

Sorry you've had a bad day Mistletoe


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly I had a low lying placenta. But by the time I got to 34 wks it had moved


----------



## northernmonkey

Holly - me too.

Does anyone ever hear from Sweetdreams? Just wondered how she was getting on.


----------



## juju81

Holly, how low is it? Ceci had a really low placenta if I remember rightly.  Think she ended up in hospital for last few weeks.  Hopefully yours will move like minis did

Abcd, bumpette, I like that.  We've been wondering what to call her whilst she's in there.  She's just known as she or baby still  

I'm lying in bed still.  Day off and half term means we dot have to rush to be out the door at 7.30.  Bliss!! I've got midwife on Thursday.  Can't believe it was 8wks ago I last saw her.  It really does fly second time round  

NM, I'm friends with SD on **.  Her twinnies are beautiful.  2 now! Goes so quickly!!


----------



## margesimpson

Hello all  ,

Special hello to a few familiar faces who might remember me. I lurk every now and then, and teresa has updates, but i want to say  a very heartfelt congratulations to juju hakuna and abcdefg for their bumps. 
Congratulations too to mini - your mini miracle is now probably a mini monkey?
Carrie -  
SD - don't know if you lurk, but wow - lovely to hear that your two are now two!
NM - sorry but I've been reading your posts back with particular interest - not stalking though, just well, looking for a story to give me reassurance that I'm not totally mad!

After much soul searching, we decided to try again with the remaining donor sperm we have. We couldnt stand the idea of it being destroyed. We tried last month and it didn't work, so we're going again this month. Already feeling the old emotions come flooding back.

Marge xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

Marge hun lovely to hear from you, its been ages. I am sorry about your BFN -             that this cycle works out for you. Can you get more DS from the same donor if you need it??

Holly also sorry you had a rubbish day      I hope your placenta moves - most do. Mine was completely stuck over my cervix and didn't move, I had a patch of placenta accreta that stopped it moving I think and I ended up in hospital with a bleed at 32 weeks, had a CS at 36 weeks but no major bleeding. I think my situation is pretty rare, most do move - when is your next scan??

Carrie do you have a plan to start your FET yet?? how are you holding up?       

Ju fabulous news about your gender scan, thrilled for you.

I have been following your chat about telling and reactions - Carrie I am so sorry your friend was so unsympathetic         I think some people don't know what to say so say the first thing that comes out of their mouth without thinking how hurtful it could be. Most of our friends and family were sympathetic and supportive, and admired DH for how he talked about it, and most I think have forgotten now. We did get some silly comments like 'oh so now you can get pregnant naturally can you' and so on, but nothing about the postman, that would make me pretty    . it is not an easy thing to do and great we can all support each other. We do read Joshi his book about once per week, he is starting to get that the men in the picture are sperm donors, but he doesn't know what that means yet, he is at the stage of saying 'boys have willies, what do girls have mummy??' so think we have a way to go yet   

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hey marge long time no see! You're very brave to be doing it again. Good luck. Yes Samuel is 18 mths now


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hi PinkCat - It is coming very very fast - 30 weeks on Sunday. Baby wriggle mouse all the time.

I went to Boots today and bought breast milk storage bags and pads on offer and got my new parenting club change bag, first pack of newborn nappies (that you have to buy to get the bag) and Aptamil No1 powder - apparently there is a shortage and they are limiting to 2 packs per person, so if I buy a couple now, at least if I need it again then I won't be in a panic post section. They also had 12 pounds of points today for £50 spent and they also accepted £5 voucher and some 20% off coupons on clothes and other vouchers, so I got about £20 of points.

I am not sure what to do about feeding this time. I have been advised to start antenatal pumping at 34 weeks and store it in the freezer. Hummm - even in the height of breast feeding C I only ever got about 1 ounce pumping from both sides for 20 minutes. So how I will have more milk this time I don't know, but I can only try. I sold my storage bags on last time as there was no point in storing such a tiny amount. But this is antenatal pumping to see if I can get it going and at least have a few mls available.

But I am not going to allow this baby to starve like C did with midwives patting me on the head telling me all was fine - I cannot imagine ending up on SCBU again with jaundice and such profound weight loss. I will ask for daily weights with this baby and if there is a hint of jaundice, tests.
And I won't hesitate to give formula top ups this time if necessary.


----------



## juju81

Holly, is that to start your supply? My sister had a better supply second time round.  Don't stress about it now hun, wait and see what happens   


Amandaloo, when are you testing?   


Abcd, how you doing hun? Knackered?


Hak, how's you hun? When is your scan?


Fizzy, did you start treatment?


Minxy, how are the boys   


Marge, wow, number 3    good for you.  Sorry about your bfn.  Fingers crossed for this month   


Pinkcat, hav you felt anything yet? Glad everything is goin ok.  Have you thought about mat leave?


I had my midwife appointment today.  Not much to report.  They are referring me for physio because of my SPD, blood pressure on the low side but nothing to worry about and they rather it be low then high.  Bloods ok etc.  asked if I wanted to do parentcraft classes to which I said no, asked if I planned to breast feed to which I said no      Went to a friends yesterday and bought her Moses basket and a load of pink vests, babygros and tights.  Got home and washed them all and hung them on the dryer.  Couldn't stop grinning at them all


----------



## carrie lou

Holly, I didn't think you are supposed to pump before the birth - is it meant to help your supply? Try not to worry. I'm sure with the benefit of hindsight you will have a much smoother journey this time round. I think there are things I would do differently re BFing next time and I had a relatively easy time of it. 

Ju, I'm the opposite - at my booking appointment (just before my mc) the MW broached the subject of BFing and gave me a mini lecture about the benefits etc. she was going on and on and I was inwardly smirking, thinking she was preaching to the converted. Then she asked me if I'd BF Zac and I said yes. She asked me for how long and I replied two years. Then sat back and enjoyed the look of surprise on her face as she said, "oh! So I don't have to sell it to you then!" 

Marge, lovely to hear from you and so exciting that you are going for number three  I have always dreamed of having three children and still hope it might happen  Let us know how you get on  

Ceci, I'm just waiting for AF then going straight into an FET cycle. Tomorrow will be 4 weeks since my mc started  So I'm hoping it might not be too much longer.

Pinkcat, hope you are well 

All this talk of telling. I must get my act together and start reading My Story to Zac more often. I'm not sure how much he takes in though he still occasionally asks about the baby in my tummy


----------



## juju81

Carrie, my AF arrived bang on 4wks after my miscarriage.  You've had the first one haven't you? Won't be long hun.  How are you feeling in yourself?    Ha ha that midwife must have felt a right idiot    Both pregnancies I've been ready for a fight with them and both times they've disappointed me by just saying "ok"    When I went to pick up the clothes yesterday, my friend was an advocate for breast feeding and tried reaching to me.  When I told her it wasn't for me she wouldn't let it drop.  I know people have their own views on breast is best but there's no need to ram it down throats.  She eventually stopped but only because I said I might think about it


----------



## carrie lou

No I haven't had AF yet since the mc. I think I ovulated about 2 weeks ago though, had ov pain, so I'm hoping AF will show up in the next few days   I'm feeling ok most of the time. Still having some very sad days. But I think I've started to accept it just wasn't meant to be, the little bean simply wasn't strong enough, and the baby I am meant to have is still waiting for me to get better and try again. It is still hard though, every so often I think "I should have been x weeks pregnant by now"   It would have been my 12 week scan next thurs, that's going to be a difficult day


----------



## amandaloo

Marge- lovely to see you wow number 3 very best of luck to you xx

Sorry not long this morning will have to do personals later

Afm- another BFN for us this morn and its OTD heck I was so nervous testing this morn . Not quite sure what to do now as just got a bill through for storage for 275 . We were going to have another go of iui this month but Not sure if we should just crack on with Ivf now . Won't be able to fit Ivf in before Xmas as I need an appt with consultant and then the unit shuts at Xmas period for deep clean . So weighing up what's best , I don't want to be skint at Xmas and paying another iui plus the bill won't help


----------



## ceci.bee

Amanda shuch a shame that this whole business costs so much!


----------



## hakunamatata

Amanda so sorry to hear that, not the news any of us wanted for you. Have you had a medicated iui with gonal f. I was only on 50 sometimes lower. I guess u would always avoid ivf, but i understand where youre coming from.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Sorry Amanda. Why don't you give it a break for now. Have Xmas then start ivf in the new year. A new year and new start.


----------



## carrie lou

So sorry Amanda. Seems like a good idea to take a break and enjoy Christmas, then start afresh in the new year. Lots of love to you


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Amanda     

Carrie - you are still really early days in your grief process - try not to be hard on yourself.    

Juju - I had very hot, swollen, red breasts that leaked milk after I lost Beanie and of course I never had a baby to feed. I am wondering if a lot of my milk ducts were shut down then.

With C, despite a full term pregnancy, I never got any growth in pregnancy, and no engorgment or leakage. I had a lot of sore boobs in the first half of this pregnancy and felt something was going on, but it has all completely settled down now, so I am worried that there won't be any milk again.

People who adopt can get milk going by taking oestrogen and progesterone and pumping.

My midwives, expecially the ones specialist in breast feeding at hospital and community are going to come up with a plan for me this time. I am going to meet with the breast feeding head midwife that I did a lot of work with last time, this month sometime to debrief what happened with C and plan ahead. One thing they have said is the antenatal pumping and store the colostrum so that if I don't have enough milk initially I can bring in frozen colostrum and this will at least keep the baby going and alert, so that there is a better chance of her being able to feed. I hope they will also properly check for tongue tie, including posterior tongue tie this time.


----------



## juju81

Ah shucks Amanda I'm gutted for you   I don't know what to suggest.  Problem with me is I'm so impatient I'd hate the break.  Go with your head tho.  The money side of it sucks big time xx


----------



## amandaloo

Thanks ladies my dh has taken it harder than me this time . Dh says hes not bothered about money and wants to do iui in nov then Ivf . We  need to decide now I as was angling to Ivf  . Thanks everyone xx


----------



## abcdefgh

So sorry Amanda   . I'm like Juju and would probably feel better not to take a break but you will know what's right for you. Was it IVF that you had to conceive your DS? If so, then maybe it's best just to go with that having the confidence that it can work for you. Good luck whatever you decide and well done for remaining positive and looking forward.  

Marge - Hello! Exciting that you are going for number 3! But sorry about your recent BFN - I don't suppose they ever get any easier. It's really doesn't feel like the time for us to be making decisions on this yet but it did occur to me that we are probably going to be asked to pay again for storage of our 3 remaining vials of donor sperm in 3 or 4 months time, and - although we are both pretty sure we only want two kids - it would be very tough to just get rid of it. 

Carrie - Glad you are getting stronger but it's no wonder you still have a lot of sadness   I was the same with my m/c - couldn't help but think about those milestones which should have been. Maybe you should plan something nice for next Thursday so you have something else to focus on.


----------



## abcdefgh

Amanda - By the way, last time I eventually got pregnant, it was our last ditch self-funded attempt at IUI in November (before moving on to NHS funded IVF in Jan) that did it


----------



## juju81

Carrie, sorry hun I missed your post.   I remember you saying something had happene 2wks after, I got confused.  Hopefully that will come any day and then u can get going next month.  They say your most fertile in the first 3 months after so I have everything crossed that next month will be your month   milestones will stay with you.  My first one would be coming up 4     were here for you you know


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks Ju   Many people seem to get pregnant soon after a mc, so I hope you're right   


Holly, it's good that they are putting a plan into place to help you with BFing this time. I never had much engorgement either except for when my milk first came in or when he (rarely!) missed a feed. And yet Zac was exclusively BF from day 1. So I don't think that is necessarily a good indication of your supply. Ah that makes sense about building up a stash of colostrum. I'm sure you'll be fine   


Amanda


----------



## juju81

Holly I never had much engorgement and my boobs leaked for about 14days, so just because they haven't yet doesn't mean they won't.  My sister produced nothing with her first but managed 2nd time round x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I didn't leak at all until after  

Carrie I had Lucas the cycle after I mc


----------



## margesimpson

Hi all,

Carrie - I feel really inadequate to say anything that will make you feel better, but I can offer a hug  
Amanda - so sorry for your bfn. Have you decided what to do? How much donor sperm have you left, that's what would decide me to go for ivf. I'm on letrozole and gonal f 150 for 3 days and its not too bad.
As for breast feeding, it sounds an amazing idea to get your supply up before baby comes. It'd stop so much frustration and learning to manually pump to "get the flow going" was the best tip ever for me. I also had to duel feel with a bottle with DS and used a nipple shield with dd so giving some from the breast and some from a syringe/bottle totally works.


----------



## margesimpson

Abcdefg - storage seems to be a real headache for us as every time the bill comes through there's the whole soul searching and dh feeling inadequate and guilty again. I've just been paying it out of my own account so he doesn't even see it coming out our joint account!


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## carrie lou

Marge, thank you - just knowing that people are thinking about me makes me feel a bit better, you don't have to say anything else  


Mini, thanks - that's good to know  


Hope everyone is well.


Well, I was right - AF is here (4 weeks and 1 day after mc started - my body doesn't waste any time!). It's really heavy, don't know if that's normal after a mc  so I have to ring the nurses as soon as they open to get a scan booked. I'm longing to have my little snow baby back and be pregnant again, but also so scared


----------



## juju81

Carrie it's totally natural to feel like that    Unfortunately my miscarriage put a total dampner on my pregnancy with Noah because I was so paranoid about miscarrying again but I was fine and you will be too    


We'll have to think about our 2 vials. I'm inclined to store it for a few years 'just incase' especially after our battle to be allowed to import more    we haven't had to pay for this years tho so got a few months to think about it 


I've had to come home from work.  Thought I was going to faint and my head is pounding


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

juju81 said:


> We'll have to think about our 2 vials. I'm inclined to store it for a few years 'just incase' especially after our battle to be allowed to import more


----------



## juju81

I just hate making decisions like that.  With Noah's leftovers, as awful ad it was that they ha to be destroyed it took the decision out of our hands.  

Have you still got any left I was your last one used on L?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah don't blame you for keeping on to it for a rainy day!    No its all used up. We ordered 3 vials and it was 3rd time lucky.


----------



## abcdefgh

We have three vials left - if this baby had been born by the time the storage was up for renewal, we'd probably not bother, but since we'll probably get asked a few months ahead of my due date I think we'll just have to pay to keep it. Or that's my excuse!   

Juju - Hope you're feeling better x

Carrie -    that your FET is successful. Good luck.


----------



## hakunamatata

Omg twins!


----------



## abcdefgh

Amazing news Hakuna!


----------



## juju81

Omg Hak! I knew it with your high HCG! How do you feel? That's like lindz! U only had one follie?


----------



## amandaloo

Hak - omg wowwwww congrats Xxx you must be over the moon xxx

Marge- I've got 9 amps !!!of sperm left so I don't really have to worry about having none left for other cycles ! 

We've made our mind up going to have another go of iui this month sod the money we can save up again once it's all over


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

That's fab news hak. How u feeling?


----------



## juju81

Amanda, don't blame u hun, I would have done.  Is IUI expensive at your clinic? It was only £500 at ours!

Hak, are they identical?


----------



## amandaloo

Juju- it's 470 for a natural cycle don't know how much for medicated . I've got 275 to pay for storage too this month so gonna be costly ! If any of you have clearblue digital ovulation tests to sell inbox me !


----------



## juju81

Would you try a medicated this cycle?? I think you should, a bit of clomid maybe? Cheap drug too so will keep the cost down.  It might up your chances a bit more


----------



## amandaloo

Juju-Hmmm can I do that now I started af on fri ? It's only 1 per cent difference in chances of medicated vs unmedicated at our clinic ? Plus I hear there's lot of scan trips ?


----------



## juju81

Oh bugger.  Probably not.  I'm surprised your clinic haven't said to go medicated tho after 3 naturals   never mind, this will be your month


----------



## margesimpson

Hakuna - that's wonderful news! I LOVE hearing about twins on here. How are you feeling? 
Amanda - don't know about clomid, I take letrozole and have to start from day 3 or 4. It's also about £900 for a medicated iui at our clinic, plus drugs at £160, so a lot more expensive. Course clinicsust vary a lot.

Hakuna -OMG again! Thrilled for you!


----------



## margesimpson

Amanda - and at least two scan trips which is not easy if you're trying to keep mysterious appts discrete


----------



## carrie lou

Congratulations Hakuna    

Amanda, I had a clomid cycle with Zac. You have to start it on day 2 I think so probably is a bit late for you this month   I didn't have to have any more scans than a natural cycle, and my clinic said it's 5% better success rate. But never mind, with a bit of luck you won't need it   

Wow my clinic seems really expensive compared to all of yours - £800 for a IUI cycle, plus extra for drugs!   


I have my scan booked for Wednesday


----------



## margesimpson

Dh keeps checking with me - am I preparing myself in case this doesn't work that this is our last try? I already feel a bit like we're going through the motions and there's no way it's going to work. Perhaps I'm fooling myself and just trying to protect myself from the disappointment if I let myself hope?


----------



## margesimpson

Carrie - don't worry - looks like gcrm are the most expensive so far....grrr! Oops the main point of posting to you Carrie was to say good luck for Wednesday


----------



## juju81

Marge, that's how I felt with this cycle.  I booked all sorts because I was convinced it wasn't going to work.  I've now got a holiday in June with an 8wk old and a New York break next November with my cousins and sister  

Carrie, good luck hun  . To be fair my clinic was just a little centre.  They literally had the equivalent of 2 private hospital rooms within the Croydon BMI main hospital so I suppose their overheads were next to nothing which meant costs could stay down!


----------



## carrie lou

Thank you Marge   I know what you mean. I think it is a self preservation thing that we do, we can't be brave enough to believe it might actually work   But look at your track record, you have a really good chance. Stay positive


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh my god, you ladies have been busy. Wanted to let ju know that will start our tx early next year, am burying my head in the sand at the moment about it all but reading along. X

But hak, twins, that's fab, so so happy  

Hello to everyone else, am reading along xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Amanda, do u have the smiley face ones? I'm sure I've for loads (had to buy them for my monitoring cycle, broke the reader thing then had to get some more the ov'd on first one doh!)


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-   I'm keeping absolutely everything crossed for you     . It must be hard for you I just can't imagine what you've been through  . Keep positive   

Fizzy -  good luck for next year  . Yes the smiley face ones  are you having Ivf?

Marge- best of luck  

My clinic didn't suggest medicated they said after 3 go's of iui then to have Ivf . I've just asked if I can have one more go as cant fit Ivf in now before Christmas


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## margesimpson

love it juju - only thing it we've no money to book any snarfy holiday cos just spent it on treatment!   embracing tesco value though and have to say mostly not bad! Actually were away with family over Christmas so if it does work, I'll be mid-hellish morning sickness. And totally worth it    

Carrie - I really thought I had myself convinced last time that it hadn't worked and then when it didn't work I was gutted and not at all mentally prepared for it. I'm so superstitious- I salute magpies cos everyone knows they decide if its bfp, bfn, pink or blue! FACT!


----------



## juju81

Not long then fizzy, it's only 51 days until Christmas  

Marge, I don't have any money, that's the problem  . You might not get MS this time?? Think positive! Although both my pregs have been exactly the same!  It's totally worth it but were still allowed to feel down when it's relentless and there's nothing you can take for it.  I've been suffering big time with migraines. I can't take anything for them.  So so hard when you have a toddler and job to do x


----------



## carrie lou

Marge     I have the same thought re Christmas, we're spending it at my sister's this year and if this works, I'll be about 7 weeks pregnant and hopefully throwing up all the time - but at least I won't have to cook   And yes we are broke too and haven't had a proper holiday in ages, what with paying for all this treatment and train trips up and down to the clinic - I feel like I should buy shares in first great western   

Amanda, thank you lovely   Yes it's been pretty awful the last few months, but I have a lot to be thankful for, not least my gorgeous boy. There's people a lot worse off than me. I just want so badly to give him a little sibling   


Fizzy


----------



## margesimpson

I've heard that you don't get morning sickness after the first two!?   The honest truth is that I did take anti nausea mess with both of mine. I couldn't keep anything down and it wasn't good for baby or myself, so tried to ignore all the guilt and went for it. Kept me on my feet and out of hospital. I know it's still a bit taboo, but needs must, so I try to be open about it.


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## carrie lou

Why should you feel bad about it?  I was very sick with Zac and remember how debilitating it was, I used to come home from work, collapse on the sofa and not move for the rest of the night. DH would bring me a milkshake for dinner   And I would sip it but not keep much down. I barely ate for the first 12 weeks. I was throwing up at work, constantly exhausted from being sick all the time, couldn't concentrate or function at work. I lost half a stone and took until 20 weeks just to put that back on again! It was miserable (but of course I would do it all again in a heartbeat!). I struggled on and stupidly never thought to ask for anti sickness meds. But if I am that sick again I think I will. Especially when you have a toddler to look after, I just don't think I could cope. Why should it be taboo. If people don't know what it's like to be constantly sick for weeks on end while being expected to carry on as normal, I don't think they are entitled to an opinion


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## juju81

I know lots of people who take anti sickness. My sister had to aswell.  I would have too if I'd had bad sickness.  Just wish there was something for migraines


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## abcdefgh

I think I win! Our clinic charge £1200 for natural iui - no scans, just insemination appointment and one cheapie pregnancy test! Grr. They are also not keen on medicated cycles.

Marge, Amanda, Carrie - Have everything crossed for your pre-Christmas BFPs


----------



## carrie lou

Ladies, I just have to share this before I go to bed - Zac did his first wee in the potty tonight     He was so chuffed with himself too, it was adorable


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## amandaloo

Carrie. - yayyyy . I started with underpants for Noah last weekend had a few accidents at first but past 3 days he's been dry all day no accidents . I started ages ago putting him on the loo (his toilet seat ) though I just upped it a step as thought he might be ready to give it a go and looks like he was . ). I'm sending him to nursery with underpants on today   ! Last week I sent him with a pull up on and he was dry there all day he just went on the potty.


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## juju81

Whooo hoo go Zac  

Amanda, that's the thing, just follow their lead, it's much easier!

Pinkcat, you have my every sympathy with the headaches (was only sick once although had nausea all day) paracetamol and ibuprofen together works x

My head is banging again today but my dizziness has gone


----------



## margesimpson

We dithered around for a while with the potty and then we mentioned it to nursery and whoosh - he was potty training and there was no turning back! Probably for the best as he was definitely ready it was just us that wasn't! 

Omg - ALL my sympathy to those with morning sickness/nausea/headaches. It gets like mantra - it will get better, it will all be worth it! 

Pinkcat - ive often often said d id love to have twins, but i would be terrified of what the sickness would be like with two babies if one floors me. Do they say its worse?
Hakuna - has it sunk in yet? Thinking of you and hoping your keeping well. 
Mx

Ps started gonal f injections today. It's all getting a bit real!


----------



## amandaloo

Juju -      hope your ok are you taking paracetamol regular and drinking plenty of water ? Stupid question probably !

Marge- exciting    best of luck 

Noah just had one accident today at nursery   so pretty happy .  I've changed all his room round today made his cot bed into the bed it looks well cute   my little baby is growing up  . Anyway he's gone straight to sleep phew I was a bit worried that he might mess around


----------



## juju81

Awww they are growing amandaloo   I was ready for Noah to mess around when we changed him into a bed and he was absolutely fine.  Used to call for us instead of get out lol! You'll get to use the cot again soon  

Yep, plenty of water.  I actually found today taking the paracetamol and ibuprofen kind of knocked it on the head (no pun intended)


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, can you take ibuprofen when pregnant? I didn't think you could but maybe I'm wrong  Sorry you're suffering with headaches.   


Amanda, that's great news on the potty training front   Zac is still a long way off though he managed another wee in the potty tonight - baby steps  I suppose they all get there eventually  


Marge, good luck, hope the injections are going OK  


Pinkcat, sorry to hear you are still suffering with the sickness, it's horrible - you have all my sympathy  


AFM, Scan tomorrow


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Juju - Ibuprofen in pregnancy should be avoided where possible and if used in the first or second trimester, prescribed by a doctor, lowest dose possible and not taken for long.
It is absolutely contra-indicated in the third trimester of pregnancy as it can close off the ductus arteriosus in the fetal heart too early and cause high blood pressure in the fetal lung - this is the hole in the heart that allows blood to bypass the lungs when they are not breathing air. Normally this closes naturally when the baby is born and starts breathing air, not before. So please don't take it after 24 weeks, preferrably avoid it now.
Don't worry too much about one small dose at your stage though. Hope the migraines improve - perhaps visit the GP?


----------



## juju81

Don't worry girls,  I went to the docs about my headaches/migraines the other week and he said to take the 2 together.  So I'm going by his advice.  I said I didn't think you could take ibuprofen in preg but he said it's fine at the stage I'm at!


----------



## Fizzypop

Isn't there something stronger you can take when pg anyway...paracetamol and something else that's prescription only? Holly?


----------



## juju81

Well that's why I went but he wasn't happy prescribing it. He said para and ibuprofen is ok for the stage I'm t and its cleared it for now


----------



## carrie lou

That's good Juju.  I get migraines sometimes  It's no fun. I find a couple of paracetamol and going back to bed for a while usually sorts it but it's hard when you have a LO to look after. Once I was so bad DH had to stay home from work to look after Zac


----------



## juju81

Sleeping hasn't been helping really.  I don't know what I'd have done If my hubby wasn't so helpful.  He literally has done everything.  Bless him  

The joys hey!


----------



## margesimpson

Pinkcat - I took cyclizine with both my pregnancies. It really did help, though t seemed to take a while to start helping. Don't know if it takes a while to build up in your system? The dehydration is a constant battle - I foun ice Lollies good. Sweet and easier on the stomach than drinks as you can jus suck on them.

They go through a lot too, our other halves! Dh said he felt like a single parent while I was pregnant with no.2 as he was doing everything and getting very little emotional connection from me. Yet we're desperate to do it all again!
Mx


----------



## margesimpson

Pinkcat/juju - have you told the boys why mummy isn't feeling well? I can't remember what we told DS, he jus seemed so young.
Carrie - how was the scan? Was it quite a thought to be doing it again?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Fizzy - you mean codeine. But this can cause constipation and dependence so best avoided unless the pain is severe.

Pinkcat - cyclizine is first line antisickness in pregnancy and I have dispensed hundreds to pregnant women, even very early in pregnancy with hyperemesis over the years. 
Ranitidine is safe too as far as I am aware. If this does not help then you can take omeprazole which is stronger.


----------



## carrie lou

Pinkcat, I think if I were you I'd try the meds   I remember how awful it is feeling sick all the time and can only imagine how much harder it is with a LO to look after as well. The doc wouldn't have given them to you if they weren't considered "safe" in pregnancy. At least you can try them and if they don't help or you don't get on with them, you can always stop. Hope you feel better   


Marge, how are you doing? Thanks for asking Hun   It was a bit of a downer actually, I realised next week will be 6 months since my first consultation re egg sharing - 6 months travelling back and forth to the clinic and nothing to show for it except an empty bank account and no baby   Just feeling a bit sad and fed up tonight. 


But the scan was fine - everything exactly as it should be. So I have to go back for another scan next Wed, will probably trigger next Friday or Saturday and have snow baby put back a week after that


----------



## juju81

Carrie, I've been nosing on other threads, hope your doing ok?!   the money is shocking.  I found a receipt for the sperm imported (funded by clinic but still) and it was £1800 just for the sperm.  Life sucks that we have to pay to have a baby    

Marge, yeah he understands all about it.  Knows I'm growing him a sister as hast been too bad but he's very impatient and at times I've just wanted to be left alone.  Sounds awful but I mean left alone from everyone and everything.  If I didn't have to worry about work it would be so much easier!

I'm speaking to my doc tomorrow.  The tiredness is killing me. Along with the fact I feel faint pretty much constantly.  It's either my blood pressure or iron levels.  The smallest of tasks make me really breathless and its not because of my bump.  I'm tiny really for someone who's nearly 18wks.  My midwife is crapola and hasn't got back to me so I'm hassling my doc


----------



## margesimpson

Carrie   - the emotions can be pretty overwhelming and are often surprising! The time thing just adds more pressure to an already stressful situation. It might feel better once your PUPO? I love being PUPO - well the first week when it's all about possibilities and potential and before the crazy mind games!

Afm - last injection of gonal f tomorrow then scan on Friday and if all ok, iui sometime this weekend maybe. OMG I hope it works this time! I hope it works for both of us!

Mx


----------



## carrie lou

Juju, I'm ok thanks. The last few months have been very rough for us. Not just the IVF and mc. Other things have gone wrong too (DH's depression and job issues). I think the mc was just the last straw for me and now I'm depressed too  I'm seeing a counsellor so hoping things will turn a corner soon. 

I am excited about having my embie back. But also anxious. I want it to work so badly. What if it doesn't? Then again, what if it does and I have to go through all the anxieties about mc again...

This is going to sound awful but... Does anyone else ever feel resentful towards hubby? I just keep thinking, if only he had some sperm, I wouldn't have to go through all this rigmarole and heartache and expense. I could almost certainly have babies the normal way. It's so unfair that the problem is with him but it's my body and my mind that has to take the strain. I know it's not logical or fair and I feel like a b*tch for even thinking it! let alone writing it down.


----------



## Fizzypop

Carrie - yep, I know where you are coming from. I get cross at having to do all the planning around treatment, taking holiday for ec amd 2ww etc., coordinating appointments, not being able to think about holidays with tx to pay for and mum bugging me to book a holiday but I don't want to tell her why as don't see why I should have too. Oh and the fact that I've had to carry on working fill time so that we have cash to pay for it, arrrggghhhhhh...sending bug hugs xxxxxxxxx


----------



## carrie lou

Fizzy     I think DH would prefer me not to work at all but if I don't then we'd have no money for tx. I've just taken a job that I'm way over qualified for simply because it was all I could get at the time and we need the money. And we haven't had a holiday since Zac was 10 months old, and that was only a week in Cornwall   


It's so unfair that money is such a major consideration. Other people can have as many kids as they like and never worry about money.   But if I start thinking along those lines I'll really depress myself.


----------



## abcdefgh

Carrie - Big hugs  . Sounds like you've had a really tough time. Fingers crossed you will be in a much happier place soon. I know what you mean too, and don't feel guilty about feeling like that - this is such a difficult thing to deal with emotionally and it's natural to be angry and resentful. I guess I wasn't angry that my DH had a medical problem but it drove me mad that he couldn't seem to care less (in my view) whether I got pregnant or not and I felt very alone at times going through treatment. xx


----------



## abcdefgh

P.S. The money thing gets me really worked up too  . I hate when I hear people moaning about how much it costs to bring up kids - well at least they don't have to spend £1000s to flippin conceive them!


----------



## carrie lou

Abcd   I know what you mean about feeling alone. It can be such a lonely journey and no one really understands.

DH was moaning tonight that he had to pick me up from the station during rush hour. It just made me so  to think that I'm going through all this to try to conceive our baby and all he has to do is pick me up but he can't even do that without complaining  He was the same when I got home after EC, lying on the sofa moaning how tired he was    while I was picking up toy cars and dirty nappies off the floor, feeding the cats, clearing away dirty dishes, all while the ache in my tummy was getting worse and worse. And I couldn't help thinking, I never wanted this life


----------



## margesimpson

Oh Carrie - you're not a bad person to feel angry or resentful, so no need to make yourself feel worse by beating yourself up about it. I don't know your situation that well, but could it be that some of the resentment is due to his depression too. He's doesn't have to be the one to fix things - it's you that juggles the appts and deals with the meds and hormones and its stressful. Do you have to give him a lot of your energy too?


----------



## juju81

Oh carrie     sounds like the mc tipped you over    I'm glad your talking to a counsellor, since we had it pre treatment I'm all for counselling    I don't ever feel like that with regards to having a baby normally, I get cross that he's so blasé about it all, like he doesn't care and when I used to say that he'd say "I don't know why you stress yourself out cos it's gonna work" not really what you want to hear.    You have to keep positive about your snow baby.  So many of us went on to have a strong BFP after our miscarriages.  Have faith hun    How is DH? Is he any better?


Holly, uve panicked me about ibuprofen now.  Even tho the doc said I would be fine


----------



## juju81

Sorry carrie, just posted then read your post.  Doesn't sound very supportive    do you think his depression has contributed to yours? Is he back at work yet?


----------



## margesimpson

Carrie - I'd be pretty resentful about that post EC. I imagine its worse than iui and that's cramping hell! Think I'd have thrown the toys at him! Maybe even the dirty nappy!


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie -      . Yes I've sometimes felt resentful about it all its hard and a stressful journey emotionally and physically  . Nobody knows what it's like unless they are going through it themselves . It's bad enough having fertility problems but to need a donor it's just so much harder  . I wish so much that it didn't have to be like this and why do we have to rely on clinics . I think your mc has made it so much more harder for you . It must be so upsetting for you and for anyone having a mc when you have gone through all this to get there  . Listen to juju about success after mc   . My dh suffers with depression and I found it very difficult at times it's not easy   he was off work on two occasions for months . No wonder your feeling down you've been through so much  .leys hope and pray your tx works will keep everything crossed for you xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Ju, don't worry, if the doc said ibuprofen was of then I'm sure it won't have done any harm 

My DH says the same sort of thing - "stop stressing, it's going to work this time" etc. not hugely helpful really. I suppose they don't understand what we go through.

DH is coming out of his depression now I think. He had about 16 weeks of counselling and is still on the anti-ds. And yes he is back at work now. At his worst though, there were days when he just lay around all day and I had to keep on top of everything - looking after Zac, all the housework, driving DH to his appointments, and of course my job. I know he was depressed and maybe I should have been more understanding. But I needed support too. I had no one to talk to (DH didn't want anyone to know) except my mum who is not very sympathetic towards people with depression. Now he is better he expects me to snap back to normal too but I just can't. 

We still don't know what is going to happen with DH's job so that is a bit of a worry. I'm seeing my counsellor again tomorrow.


----------



## margesimpson

Thing is...our dhs - they already feel sh$t. DH says he feels like he let me down, that I didn't get what I thought I was marrying. I don't suppose he can give you much support due to his depression. Have you anyone else close than can give you emotional and practical support.


Oops sorry should've read your post first- it never ceases to impress me how amazing women are! We can handle so much, but it's good to have a bit of support. Hope the counseling helps, but is it really fair for him to ask you not to talk to friends/family if he isn't able to give you that support himself? These forums are great but sometimes you just need a hug!

Mx


----------



## carrie lou

My mum is really the only one I can talk to. She has been more supportive lately but her attitude is really "snap out of it and get on with your life". I had a very good friend but we had a falling out and haven't spoken for months. She doesn't even know I was pregnant. 


I know our DHs must feel bad. But right now I just can't shake this feeling that life is so unfair and cruel. 

I felt like my pregnancy was the one good thing that had happened to us this year, the one good thing I had to look forward to. And then it was taken away. It felt unbearable, like the worst thing that could possibly have happened.


----------



## margesimpson

Carrie - talk to the counsellor and see if they can advise on how to explain to your mum or even dh about the support you need. Men sometimes respond well to clear requests, e.g. I need you to take care of me for the next few weeks. Maybe your mum is trying to help in her own way but just doesn't understand? You could try telling her that you need her to be supportive, not to offer some sort of sticking plaster over the cracks?

In the meantime, keep reminding yourself that you did get a bfp last time although it ended in MC, your body knows what to do and you've a good chance of it working this time.


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## margesimpson

Hi all,

Carrie - how are you and how was the counsellor?

Pinkcat/juju - how are you feeling today? 

How is everyone else? Winter is definitely here! Does anyone know if you can get the flu jab if your pregnant? I usually get it to protect the older people I work with but am nervous about getting it during the 2ww!

Mx


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## juju81

Hey Marge, just off to bed.  I had it done a few wks ago.  Beginning of October.  They recommend it for pregnant people and I was in my first tri x

I'm pretty ropey, have bloods tomorrow to check iron levels.  Hopefully it is that I can get it sorted and restore my energy levels!


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## carrie lou

Marge, the flu jab is routinely offered to pg ladies as they are at higher risk. I had it at about 12 weeks with Zac, so you should be fine   


Juju, hope you get it sorted and feel a bit better   


I'm doing ok. Saw the counsellor today, she is very nice and had some helpful suggestions. But as I'm only seeing her every other week I'm finding it a bit hard to build up a rapport.   Not sure what to do as we can't afford to pay for private counselling. Surely there should be more help than this on the NHS? I was thinking of talking to the counsellor at the clinic who is at least free, but it would have to be over the phone.


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## margesimpson

Carrie - if the clinic counsellor would deal with issues other than pre-treatment issues, that might be a really useful resource? Thanks for the advice re: flu jab, I'm worrying about all these things and I'm not even PUPO yet. I just want to do everything possible to help this treatment work!


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Marge - I have had the flu jab at work when pregnant with C at 14 weeks and this one at 27 weeks, no probs. It is recommended as swine flu is dangerous in pregnancy.
We also have to have the whooping cough booster 28-38 weeks now to protect the baby.

Juju - I told you not to worry about a small dose at your stage of pregnancy - it is 3rd trimester where you must not take it. It will be fine!

It is all about risk/benefit and if you were suffering a really nasty headache that was making life unbearable then it is fine. But I would tell anyone to avoid unnecessary drugs for very minor complaints if at all possible in pregnancy. It sounds like you were really suffering.

Carrie - you know the situation with my DH. I am very resentful of him in general and particularly to do with all the s  he has put me through with regards to having treatment, miscarriage, pregnancy, childbirth and parenting.

We barely speak now. He is sod all support - emotionally, physically or financially - none at all, in fact just makes everything worse. More mess in the house, more expense, more washing, snappy bad tempered criticism when he is in the same room.

e.g. tonight..... He came in, did not say a word, stomped in, no eye contact, huffed and puffed about papers being put in one pile rather than spread all across the table (I was trying to clean - but that is not allowed), made himself food scattering empty packets and food around kitchen and putting all the trays out of the oven on the side, did not put them back. Used the electricity I am paying for for an hour using the oven (he has decided he does not want me to cook family meals anymore for him, so is constantly using more electricity he pays nothing for).

Then I tried to tell him that as I was going to my midwife appointment this morning, my Dad's neighbour phoned, making me really late, to have a go at me about being uncaring and not putting Dad in a nursing home (excuse me! I am doing everything I can through the right channels to try and get him suitable accommodation and nothing is available, I am getting his cataracts sorted and he has an appointment with the dementia team tomorrow for an assessment of his dementia and mental capacity regarding choices about residential care, and I was there all weekend and did all his shopping etc, but apparently I don't care).

Then, no comment from DH sympathetic or otherwise, instead he chose to have a go at me about not feeding the pets this morning. Well, I thought he would have done it when he got up. He did not communicate to me otherwise and he has just listened to me telling him about how late I was for my appointment due to the phone call. I said to him that he did not tell me that they had not been fed so how was I to know. He just said ''you were here all day''. If I had fed them twice that would have been wrong too!

I don't know about you, but I am not a mind reader.

Last night he was having a go at me about C being in the kitchen and I had to put the stair gate up again. I was feeling really ill and bloated last night and could hardly bend down, but I had to put the gate up when I was trying to eat the little dinner I had made myself.

Then he had a go at me about not taking a broken microwave to the tip. At 31 weeks pregnant nearly I am sure carrying a microwave would not be good for me?

And the cat was sick, but he stepped over it like it did not exist and I had to clear it up, unable to bend down. Baby is breech and her head is in my ribs.


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## juju81

Holly, I think you need to start looking at the bigger picture.  What would you tell a good friend in the same situation? I personally don't see how I could carry on living with someone like that.  It's not a good environment for little C and his nearly new sister.  It's totally unreasonable behaviour and anyone could see that.  You have records here of what he's put you through.  It's pure emotional abuse and I don't think it fair on any of you.  Do you see the situation getting any better?  I know it must be hard hearing others telling you what a complete ar$e he is but we/I only say it because we/I care.  I've noticed before thr you hardly ever respond to our advice but please come back and tell us how you feel about it.  About getting out


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## ceci.bee

Holly I agree with Ju we all care about you on here, I worry that as you carry on cleaning and paying for things he will never change and he will only abuse the situation and your good nature more. She is right, you often tell us about the terrible things he does, but hardly ever about what you are thinking you might do about the situation - we are all here to support you and it does not sound like a healthy situation to be bringing up children in - they, and you deserve so much more. If your daughter in the future grows up with you being treated like that, she might think that is what marriage/relationships are.

lots of love
Ceci


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

The trouble is, it is so impossible to have even a simple conversation with him about minor matters. I can't get out of him what he thinks or have a conversation with him about going separate ways.

I asked him the other day ''why don't you just go?'' And the response was ''where? I have not got any money.... live in a caravan?''
He has profit in his business. He says he can only just afford to keep the business running. But his accounts last year, he has a reasonable profit after all business expenses, but he does not contribute a penny to us. He can go away in his 4x4 most weekends and afford ferry fees, meals out and entrance fees to events etc. There are parcels being delivered every day practically. Not sure what they are.

I have not touched (our) his room for months as it is such a tip. I refuse to keep clearing up after him. He has not changed the bedding for months and months. It is disgusting. But as far as I am concerned he can wallow in it. Why should I, pregnant, make a huge bed and duvet up just for him? He can either sleep in a greasy stench or do something about it. (Am I being unreasonable here?)

I am so terrified that he is going to strip me of all my assets and money that I have saved, that I have worked for, and I am worried that he could be waiting for something to happen to my Dad so that he can take half of that too. So really something needs to happen sooner rather than later, but I don't feel like I have the time or energy.

I am so angry that he has made my dream of having a happy family life with 2 gorgeous children, a loving supporting relationship full of happiness and family time, such a dissapointing load of crap. (Bar the 2 gorgeous children of course  )


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## juju81

I think you need to start by seeking professional advice. He's not paid a penny, he makes your life hell, you have 'diarys' and you have dependants I'm sure he couldn't just walk away with half of the assets?  Instead of asking him to go, tell him.  Tell him in no uncertain terms is he welcome there any longer putting you and your longed for children through the daily abuse you are getting.  Once you've sorted all that our, I guarantee you will have a much happier life.  Find the strength love, if not for you then those beautiful children.  One more thought, could you move some of your money into another account? xxx


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## carrie lou

Oh Holly   I can only echo what the others have said. You can't go on letting this man treat you with so little respect. You are a wonderful strong person and deserve better. You don't want your children to grow up thinking his kind of behaviour is acceptable.


Can you talk to a solicitor just to find out what the money situation would be? If you can prove he has not contributed, surely he wouldn't be entitled to anything of yours. If anything, he would have to pay you child maintenance, wouldn't he, since he is (at least on paper) their father? I think you would be so much better off without him. 


I know my DH can be a prat at times but deep down I know he cares about me and Zac. I'm not sure you can say the same about yours.


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## abcdefgh

Mistletoe - I agree with everything the others have said. You know emotionally what you need to do - don't let practicalities get in the way. I hope with the right advice and support the process will feel a lot less daunting   You and your little ones deserve a happy family life - which you can definitely have, just without him. xx

AFM - Had our early scan this morning. The sonographer was very pleased with the way everything looked and measured. So, I'm officially 7+1 and due on 26th June


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## Fizzypop

Holly - I am reading this in complete and utter disbelief that someone can treat you like this. Please don't put up with it. Please talk to a solicitor and seek advice so you know options. As Ju said, can you transfer your money out, to your dad for example. But stand up to him, I bet if you found the strength to be a complete ahole to him as he is to you, that you would find him being a bit different. And don't back down! And have you got anything on him that you can use as a threat against him if the situation got nasty? Big hugs xxx


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## juju81

Abcd, fab news hun.  Bet that made your day  here's o a happy healthy 7.5months


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## hakunamatata

Yippee Abc thats fantastic hun.

Holly I'm shocked and dismayed hun you must feel so alone when you need the support yourself. sounds like youre doing fab with your dad. Big hugs for you. Defo time for action tho. x


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## abcdefgh

Thanks. Yes, it's been a good day (apart from feeling sick  ) and we have shared the news with family which has been nice. I'm feeling very very lucky that things have gone so smoothly. x


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## amandaloo

Abcde- great news









Holly - please don't carry on in this relationship it's not worth it . How on earth do you know what he's saving with his business if you don't talk ? he could have money put away ? Have you thought that he could be having an affair he's away every weekend and coming back and treating you like cra* ? It doesn't sound right to me ? Im sorry for suggesting this in well aware i may be overstepping the mark but honestly does not sound normal ? Can you not give your savings to your dad then start divorce proceedings ? It takes ages to divorce so you may get away with doing that ? I think you need to get out of the whole situation for yourself and your children :-( 

Juju - did you go drs x


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## margesimpson

Abcdefg - that's wonderful news! It's so lovely to be able to start sharing your exciting news. I sometimes allow myself to daydream about it, but it's too hard to go there, when there's a very big hurdle before that! Omg I started to well up today at the scan, because there's a few tiny follies. "Come on follies!" 

Holly -   what do you want to do? We all like to moan about our dh sometimes just to vent and get confirmation that we're right and they're wrong, but when you post, are you looking for confirmation about a decision you've already made?. It's clear you want to do the best for your children - your heart will tell you the right thing to do. It's usually also the hardest thing to do. Extra hugs for you today!    

Carrie - hey babe, how are you doing today? When we went to counseling pre-treatment they emphasized trying to find positive things or nice moments and not becoming overwhelmed by the treatment process as it can be so all-consuming. What's the next step for you now?

Afm - I'm tring to take things one step at a time and to reign in my daydreaming, obsessing and worrying, but it's not easy! Scan today showed quite a few follies, only one reasonable size, 15mm, so to take HSG on Sunday and diui on Monday! 

It seems that the clinic is not happy with the accomodation at their satellite clinic in edinburgh and so will only see people in Glasgow from jan on. I said how awful that was and was told not to worry as it hopefully wouldn't affect me!? I pointed out how it would potentially double the stress of treatment for some people who may already be traveling to scans etc. it would also make it much harder to have treatment without having to tell work about our private situation. It's so disappointing that they couldn't overcome these difficulties! Do you think I should write to them?


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## amandaloo

Margiesimpson -  good luck it's nice to dare to dream also worrying after you've done it ! Hope it all goes well for you  I don't think I've got any dreams left after 5 bfn's in a row


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## margesimpson

Amanda - thing is statistically you're due a bfp and I've already had my unusually high rate a success!
I try to tell myself that the feeling that our family isn't yet complete must mean that there is a baby in our futures, and each step takes us close to that.

I got sent something recently which struck a chord: "one day soon, someone is going to hug you so tight that all of your broken pieces will stick back together." And I thought, it might be a big hug, but I bet it comes from one of those amazing little people we have in our lives!


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## abcdefgh

Marge -   It's so hard not to obsess, isn't it. I just gave myself a good talking to after my BFN in Sept and prepared myself that I would be in it for the long haul and end up seriously out of pocket - that's why it was such a shock to actually get a BFP in October. I know you have a bit more pressure than we did, but it's definitely a good idea to try to take everything one step at a time. The nurse was right - the clinic's plans for Jan may well not affect you so try not to worry. And I'm sure you'll find a way to figure things out with work if you have to - but, again, with any luck it won't be an issue. I do know how frustrating stuff like that can be though - practical obstacles always just remind me of how bloody unfair all this business is


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## margesimpson

Abcdefg - I know you're right and she was only trying to stop me worrying, but my concern is for folk like me 3 years ago, stressed and desperate for a baby and struggling to keep things discreet. I'm sure if they asked their clients, they'd say they rather be seen in a room that isn't ideal than drive an extra 1 1/2 hours each way for 10min appt for scan and bloods!


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## abcdefgh

Yes, it's definitely rubbish   - no doubt a money-saving thing  . You should say something to them, but also try not to get too stressed about it personally. Good luck on Monday by the way. xx


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## amandaloo

Margiesimpson - keep positive you've been successful before you can be again    it's obviously a good tx for you if it's worked previously   .


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## juju81

Easy for me to say but keep positive Marge.  You've had brilliant success previously  

Amanda, like Marge says, you are so due a BFP.  I have absolutely everything crossed for you.  Went to docs today, had bloods taken and shoul get back by weds   that's ages.  In the meantime I've got some iron enriched food in!

ABCD, will you find out what your having?

Hak   

Fizzy, good luck for January love.  New year, new beginnings


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## abcdefgh

Amanda - You've had horrible luck but there's no reason the next treatment won't result in your BFP. The fact that you've been pregnant before is also a positive I'm sure.   

Ju - Yes, we will find out if boy or girl. I'm so impatient - I want to know now! Hope you feel better soon. x

It's well past my pregnancy bedtime so I'm off to bed! x


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## margesimpson

Thanks gals, thing is...everything looked good with follies last time, apparently the sample was great, the iui went really well and the sperm is put right there, practically dropped on top of the egg. My body's done it before, but lets me down now. Blooming sex education - made it sound like any contact of sperm and egg would practically guarantee a pregnancy!  

Juju - really hope the iron helps  

Has anybody heard from hakuna? 

Abcdefg -   oh man, I remember that. Shattered right after dinner! Sleep tight.


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## juju81

I've heard from Hak.  She's doing ok, struggling at mo with sickness 

Marge, do you trigger or just pee on a stick?


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## carrie lou

Evening ladies  

Abcd, congrats on a great scan  Sorry to hear you're feeling sick but it must be a reassuring sign.  

Amanda, try to stay positive hun. You've had a really bad run of luck but it has to change soon I'm sure       

Marge, great news on your follies, All the best for IUI    Love your saying about the big hug   It's a shame about your clinic and yes I do think you should write to them, perhaps they haven't fully realised how it will affect their patients so would be good to get your perspective on it  

AFM, I rang up this morning and made an appointment with the clinic's counsellor next Wednesday, it will be just before my scan appointment. I'm quite looking forward to it now, the opportunity to talk to someone who's experienced in this sort of thing. Even if I only see her once, I think I will get something useful out of it. 

Zac has a nasty cold and has been so clingy and demanding all day... Bless him, I know he can't help it but I feel totally drained now! Every 5 minutes "Blow my nose, mummy"   I may have to teach him to blow it himself!


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## margesimpson

I take ovitrelle as the trigger shot at 12.00 on Sunday then iui scheduled for 12.30 on Monday. We're going to try some progesterone support afterwards, just in case it helps - going for belts n braces! 

No wonder Hak is suffering, growing two babies! Wonderful news but poor thing probably can't enjoy it for being ill. Feel better Hak    

Poor zak too! If he's anything like DS, they start with the man flu early!   Do I detect a more positive voice there? Talking it out with someone experienced and impartial will be great. In the meantime there's always us!  
Ps I have a terrible cold/possible chest infection - anyone have reassurances that it won't affect our chances?


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## hakunamatata

Morning girls thanks for all your concern. I have felt very sick and the sod is back already, yep at 9 weeks.

I've kept a low profile as I didn't want to upset anyone. I'm really struggling with the prospect of twins and Addi. My head has felt like its going to burst and been very tearful. Trying to keep on an even keel because of my bipolar and not on any meds but have struggled a but, sorry. I know its a precious miracle but I'm just so overwhelmed by all the logistics. Even the idea of carrying two is daunting. I feel guilty for Poor addi, what time will she now get and will she feel left out with twins when all I wanted ti give her was company. Sorry girls if I'm too much just say, I don't even feel comfy sayung this on a twin thread. Pinkcat you seem so at ease with it. Sorry again girls


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## abcdefgh

Hakuna - You don't have to apologise at all   Of course you should share your feelings on here. Sorry you are feeling overwhelmed by it all. I think that is completely natural. I have to admit being a bit worried about how I will cope with two, so it is not surprising that the idea of three is daunting. Also, lots of women feel a bit low in early pregnancy with all the hormones, the sickness and the anxieties it brings and find they are not as excited as they 'should' be - it's natural that you will be feeling this even more with twins. I hope you can get some extra support from your clinic, friends and family etc to help you come to terms with it. And please don't feel afraid to post on here.  

Marge - Sorry you're feeling ill   . I have loads of amateur theories about why treatment does or doesn't work    and this time because I had a vomiting bug 1 or 2 dpuiu I figured my body must have been more receptive to the embryo because my immune system was lowered! I'm sure your clinic wouldn't go ahead if they thought it would affect your chances. Good luck   

Carrie - Glad you are feeling positive about your counselling appointment. Hope it's useful. x


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## amandaloo

Hak- don't be sorry   . It must be a very daunting experience for you I know Anyone must be worried about getting there head around having 2 babies especially with a toddler too .  Did you have meds last time for your Bipolar whilst pg  ? I seem to remember talking about it to you at some point but can't remember if you did or not ? Sorry your feeling so sick  . Think I've mentioned before I've looked after ladies on meds for Bipolar and they have had healthy pg's . Speak to your cpn if you still have one if your feeling off   . I'm always here too if you need me


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## hakunamatata

Thanks Amanda. I managed med free last pg which was fab. I cant take olanzapine in pg so they would have to try something new. I'm not at that stage yet so hoping to get past 1st trimester at least. I'm hoping my psychiatric nurse gets back in touch soon. X


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## juju81

Hak, we've already 'spoken'   am here hun   I was also terrified at the prospect of twins do can only imagine how you feel.  Just to give you a bit of hope though, you say your SPD is back.  I went to my doc about what I thought was SPD quite early but he said it was just normal ligament pain as SPD can't happen before 12wks because the fetus is still within your pelvis.  It's when it moves out that SPD occurs.  That's not to say in a few wks it won't be.  Mine started straight away and my midwife referred me for physio (they can refer from 16wks) and I have my appointment Friday.  So I would suggest next time you see a professional, get them on the case.  No one wants to see you upset hun.  I know mighty mini struggled with how her dS1 would feel, hopefully she'll come along and give you some wise words.  Just take each day as comes, I'm pretty sure in a few wks/months the news will have sunk in.  Just think about the future and how lovely it will be for all of them to have each other


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hak I'm I my phone and on my way out but will post properly later. Don't feel guilty   I've not got twins but felt the same as you. I'm site everyone on the twins thread will know how you're feeling so tell them how you're feeling. 

Back later


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## carrie lou

Hak    Don't ever feel bad about sharing your thoughts on here. I can imagine it is a very overwhelming prospect for anyone but especially with Addi as young as she is. One of the girls on another thread here has a daughter Zac's age and then identical twins with a 19 month age gap    I don't know how she does it but everything just seems to work out OK.


Do have a look on the twins board here (if you haven't already). I'm sure these feelings are all very normal and common and most likely the experienced twin mummies on there will be able to reassure you. Take care hun


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## amandaloo

Hak - that's good that you didn't need it last time  . It just sounds natural anyway think I'd feel like you were doing   .I've looked after several ladies prescribed Olanzapine in pg but I do look after very complex ppl xx


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## northernmonkey

Holly - please get in touch with Refuge. As you may know they are a charity who support women who are victims of domestic violence but that doesn't mean just physical - they define domestic violence as the habitual intimidation of a person to control them. I know someone who has sought help from them before and found them really helpful. 

Will post a fuller reply later, just feeding the baby. 

x


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## margesimpson

Evening all,

Hak - oh honey  , on these boards we so often seem to view twins as the jackpot result but must of us also know that the reality is scary and don't judge you at all for being honest. If you're struggling, this is place to come, that's the deal with this place: unconditional support and encouragement. There's so many families now with multiple young kids, so there are plenty of great ideas out there for helping you cope. DD will cope with it far better than you expect her to and she will gain SOOO much more than she loses out on having siblings to play with. It could be the making of both of you!

Pink cat - one day at a time sounds like a good idea. I will need to try to do that myself!

NM - good to hear from you - how is bubs?

Juju - did the bloods show anything? Low iron?

Hope the others are feeling a bit better, less sick, less worried, less sad and less put apon.  

Abcdefg - thanks, it never occurred to me that being ill might help us! Well, taking the trigger shot tomorrow, iui Monday and then we're in the laps of the gods.


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## juju81

Marge, I have every faith that in 2wks time you'll be announcing a BFp  

Bloods not back until next week.  If its not that then I'm screwed because something isn't right!! So, I'm praying its low iron!


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## margesimpson

Juju -   

 just realized I haven't updated my age since we started....erhrm...wishful thinking perhaps?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## margesimpson

Well might you laugh - I just aged 5years!


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## amandaloo




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## juju81

should have put it back!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

just realised i'm 2 yrs younger too!


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## Fizzypop

Lol, mine is 3 years out too!!!


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## ceci.bee

Hakuna hun               I think the way you are feeling is completely normal facing the prospect of a toddler and twin babies - having had one baby you know how hard it can be, and the feeling of doing that in duplicate is pretty overwhelming. I suspect that every twin mummy on the twin thread has had the same worries and fears and they can help and support you I am sure - lots of women have had a toddler and then twins and in the end you do what every mum in every part of the world has done - you cope one day to the next, and manage to get through it somehow with the support of everyone around you - and Addi will be an amazing big sister and probably love being the grown up bossy big sister! I hope your CPN and your docs can help support you as well, giving you meds if you need them, keeping everything crossed for you. We are all here to support you and send you virtual           

Holly - I agree with NM, think that is a good idea, even if only for a chat about your circumstances. There is no way that any judge would get you to pay costs to him, or remove the children from your care to his as you are clearly the primary carer for both children and support the entire house hold on your income and he contributes very little. My father has a very long standing career in family law and the law is very clear about that - happy to chat if you want to PM me. good luck and big              

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly you really do need to sort this out. There's no way is subject my children to that sort of life. I think is rather lose all my money.


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## Lindz

Hey everyone!
Just jumping in to say hello and    to Hak. Honestly, no-one on the twins threads would misunderstand your concerns. You can be totally grateful for your little miracles but still be worried about sleep and coping with 3 etc. If you look on the first 12 months thread you'll see lots of people discussing struggles but still loving their babies. I only had 2 and no toddler but it was tough. I know your worried about Adi but I think you'll cope better knowing what to expect and having done it before. We lived through a very strict routine so they slept at the same time 9-10:30, 12-2, 3-4 etc so if you did that you could still manage 1 on 1 time with Adi. As tough as it was I've found that it's easier to have twins as they get older as they entertain each other. You may well have a hard few months but you'll get through, it'll get better and better! I'm sure there's others who are better placed than me but shout if I can help. 

Hi everyone else. Hope everyone's well. Ju- did I say huge congrats? I'm keeping up and reading your diary just rubbish at posting. 

Good luck to everyone trying for number 2 or 3! We're still paying for our sperm storage just because we're putting off making a decision. DH is worried I'll get broody when the twins go to school. I'm worried he might be right. Need to add a few years to my to ticker too....

X


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## abcdefgh

How did it go today Marge? x


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## margesimpson

Abcdefg - it went as well as it could and when I came out the kids ran up excitedly to give me a great big hug, which really helped because I've been a bit of a wreck. The nurse asked how I was doing and I burst into tears, everything was so close to the surface. They must think I'm a total tv'aholic because I have the Telly on every time they go out the room, just so I don't allow myself to think. We've done all we can and now just (ha! "Just" ) have to wait 16 days to find out if its worked. 16 days! That's the longest wait yet! 

How's everyone else this evening? Catching up on strictly it takes two? Poor Dave.

Mx


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## abcdefgh

Glad it went well Marge. I think you can get a fairly reliable result from a test in 14 days, if not earlier. You don't have to wait until OTD   Good luck!


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## juju81

Glad it went well but yeah sod waiting 16days!


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## carrie lou

Glad it went well Marge. Bless you, I was the same when the clinic counsellor asked me how I was - burst out crying    I'm sure they are used to it   


I tested positive on day 13 with Zac, day 15 with my second pregnancy.   Good luck honey   


I've had a nice day. I'm in between jobs at the moment so took Zac down to visit my mum today. We had a really good chat then went out for tea and cake


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## amandaloo

MargieS- glad all went well best of luck hope them cuddles from your children are the lucky cuddles you needed    

Holly - Are you ok? 

Carrie -  tea and cake recipes for a great day out xx


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## juju81

How are you Amanda??

Has anyone just watched Katie Hopkins on This morning.  I love her.  She makes me laugh!!


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## juju81

Holly, how are things?


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## amandaloo

Juju- I'm good thanks going to start testing tonight for ovulation  don't think it's far away     for a perfect iui and a bfp fingers crossed x


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## juju81

I've got everything crossed lovely


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## margesimpson

Good luck Amanda - do you test twice a day?


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hi all
Marge - glad went well. My OTDs have been 17-18 days post EC and I have never tested early. I prefer to have a clear answer and my first test has always been quite faint in all three pregnancies.

Hak - of course you are worried. The stress of a twin pregnancy, how you will feel in later pregnancy, how to cope with two newborns and a toddler. I am not surprised.
I feel in pain, breathless and stretched every day at work. I am only 31 weeks and am struggling at work already now. Baby is breech and high up due to a low placenta. I am struggling to lift C and cope with him jumping on me. I can't sleep. I am hungry at peculiar times and sick at others.
I worry about where C will go when I am in hospital and obviously what will happen to him if anything happens to me. Hoping low placenta does not put me on bed rest in hospital as I have no one to look after C. Then coping with a toddler and a baby and a c-section with no one to help me at all. I literally have no one at all who will help me other than my friends who may or may not rally round. 
Does not mean I do not think I am doing the right thing for me, C and the baby by expanding the family for them. Does not mean that I am not totally excited and amazed and blessed and happy etc etc etc

As for DH, he put the dog out this evening in the garden. I got up and made myself a little dinner and wanted to sit down in peace to eat. DH thought I should have got the dog in when I went to the kitchen. I said give me 10 mins to eat (as the dog can be a little naughty begging) and DH said ''why don't you just get rid of him''.
Now why oh why does having the dog in the garden for 10 more mins mean that I want the dog rehomed or put to sleep (not sure what he meant exactly). It is this sort of total over reaction and bizzare comment that makes me live on egg shells and wonder what the hell is going through his mind all the time.

He has however bought C a little tikes car (C loves them sooooo much at nursery and at my friend's house) off ebay for Christmas. C will absolutely love it.

But then, DH snapped tonight that C was a ''spoilt little boy''. What does that mean? C does have a lot of toys (don't they all?) and he says ''I want it'' a lot at the moment from everything from milk to cartoons etc, but I do not let him have everything he wants and I ask him to sit down nicely and be polite otherwise he does not get. C is learning please and thank you well and I get lots of kisses and generous hugs. He is learning to share. It is not totally consistent at the moment, but every day he is making polite and generous gestures that are met with praise. And rudeness is met with instruction, sanctions or other control.

Why does DH have to make such negative dampner on things when C is doing well. Why not focus on the nice and moderate the bad? All toddlers are learning their place in the world surely and don't get everything right immediately?

Just watching the Phillipines - so so so sad. I work with a lot of Phillipino nurses and they are such lovely people. So sad what has happened to their country.


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## juju81

Holly when do you finish work? Why is DH not helping when ur had the baby? Have you thought about the advice we've given? Eg seeing the CAB? A solicitor? Some do one hour free? xx


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## amandaloo

Marge- yes testing twice a day had a nightmare with the cheap ones this morn they are so hard to read thought it might have been positive anyway been out and bought clearblue digital and its negative . I was organised and ordered clearblue digital from eBay but the lady told me she posted late as problem with supplier so had to buy an expensive packet this morning  . Anyway a black cat crossed my path this morning and I also found a lucky pixie charm In my drawer which I hadn't opened !   anything for a bit of luck !!


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## hakunamatata

Wishing you all the best Amanda, we take our luck in any form we can get it. X 

Yay marg Pupo, good luck honey, more lucky cuddles needed. X


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## carrie lou

Good evening ladies   


Amanda, all the best for this cycle - definitely sounds like lucky omens to me    


Juju, god no, Katie Hopkins - I wanted to slap her I'm afraid   


Holly, sorry DH is being such a   Are you any closer to doing anything i.e going separate ways? I do feel for you, it can't be an easy thing to think about   

Unfortunately my scan today was a bit iffy - my lining is good and thick as they want it to be, and the appearance suggests I haven't ovulated yet (who knew they could tell that by how your lining looks?  ) but she couldn't see a dominant follicle anywhere. She even scanned me through my tummy and thought she saw something that might have been a big follie on my left, but she wasn't certain. Funny because all my ovulation pain has been on the right! Anyway they want me back tomorrow for another scan to check. If it is indeed a follie and has grown by tomorrow, I will trigger tomorrow night and have ET next Thurs. But if it hasn't grown there is a possibility I have already ovulated (very surprising since I am only on day 11). If so there is no way of telling when this happened and we will have to cancel the cycle since my hormone balance may be out of synch with the age of the embryo. I will be devastated to cancel - it feels like yet another hurdle and I am so tired and don't know how much more heartache and stress I can take. At the end of the day though I would rather wait another month than risk putting my precious frostie back into less than perfect conditions. So, fingers crossed for tomorrow's scan but if it's not meant to happen this month, then I will wait.  


This evening while putting Zac to bed I had a sorry for myself moment and started crying.   When Zac saw he said, "Oh, mummy crying! Let me give you another cuddle" and threw himself into my arms. It made me cry even harder but also I felt so proud of my sweet, sensitive little boy   I so badly want to make him a big brother but sometimes it seems so hard to keep going


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## margesimpson

Evening all,

Carrie -   oh my goodness do I know that feeling. I was devastated when our first cycle this time was abandoned, but after a day or so we were back to planning for next cycle and felt better. I don't know if its the hormones but its total emotional intensity. As you say, if its not right, you don't want to chance anything. Bless wee zac, sounds like you've a wee star there! Wait and see before you worry too much, it amazes me how things can turn round so quickly. Now come on that lead follie!    

Amanda - the money just seems to flow out during treatment doesn't it! Apparently we're all a superstitious lot. So what do you make of this - during our iui on Monday the song on the radio (which is clearly of supreme predictive power   ) was.....mama Mia!?

Holly - you have amazing willpower! If AF hasn't arrived by the day before, I'll test as I'm at home with the kids that day. Otd I'm at work and I'd rather have some privacy to fall apart. 

How are all the mummy's feeling? 
Mx


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## juju81

Carrie, didn't you do a bit of AP though? Or have I just made that up   . Fingers crossed for tomorrow scan.  I always had pain on my right even if I was ovulating from my left.  My nurse did call it by a name but I can't remember now! Bless Zac.  Your hormones will be all over the place lovely.  And inside you'll still be grieving for your little one too  

Marge, the countdowns on. Loads of   coming your way 

Amanda, damn tests.  Makes me angry how expensive they are.  Got everything crossed for you too.  

  for a bumper crop of sticky bfps coming up  

AFM, nearly half way done   headaches have finally eased, tiredness not so and my docs lost 2 of my tests so I need more tomorrow.  Have physio Friday for my SPD! Noah has his flu nasel spray next weds too.  I'm glad, I'd hate for him to get flu.  He's got a dry tickly cough and he's only just stopped coughing! Feel I'm in for a long night so am off to bed!


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## carrie lou

Ju, Zac had the flu spray a few weeks ago. He wasn't impressed   But it's all in a good cause. Sorry Noah has a cough, Zac is also just getting over a nasty cold.   Yes I am AP, well as much as I can be   though Zac is in his own bed now but we do still co-sleep sometimes like when he's poorly and needs a bit of extra reassurance.


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## margesimpson

Is AP attachment parenting? Ours have always been in their own beds or I'd never sleep myself, but DD is like a limpet now! She's always been very cuddly but she could happily hang off someone all day, like a little monkey! Don't remember DS being like this, but perhaps he was and I just never bothered because I had only him to worry about? 

DS had his flu spray too, not to big a deal and I thin he got a book for it! Is that just scotland though, the book bags?

I heard a good story from the tesco guy the other day about substituted items: d'you know lemon dishwater tablets for an actual lemon etc. Well someone had ordered condoms, but as they were out of stock, got a pregnancy test instead! Last day in the job me thinks?


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## carrie lou

Marge, we didn't get a book - must be just Scotland. It was a bit like a conveyor belt in fact, barely time to sit down in the clinic room before they were ushering us out and the next child in   But I suppose when they have so many kids to vaccinate, they can't afford to hang around.


Yes AP is attachment parenting. And Zac is very cuddly too   We had him in our room until he was one because it was the only way I got enough sleep to function. Then he started sleeping better so we popped him into his own room and he managed the transition just fine.   That's really funny story from the Tesco man


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## amandaloo

Ceci- best of luck for today really hope you can start this cycle   let us know  ^reiki

Keep forgetting to tell you all .Noah doing really well with potty training . He still doesn't tell us when he needs to go but he is waiting to go on loo . Had no accidents since last week . Took him nursery with underpants on no accidents so pretty chuffed . Just need him to tell us now then we don't have to keep asking and guessing ! He's ok in his little bed too . Happy days x


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## juju81

Carrie, thought so.  Whatever works well for you I guess.  Noah would never sleep in our bed, he was in his own room at 3wks and we all slept much better! Thing is with Katie Hopkins is she thrives on the debates but she just makes me laugh now  

Amada, well done Noah.  He'll get it more and more now  

Flu jabs are a conveyor belt here too, don't even take you coat off 

Noah's got croup again.  Spent most of last night awake then he wet the bed twice!   Am drained!


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## amandaloo

Juju- have you got a humidifier ? I swear by them someone told me her son got croup when younger too so she bought one and soon as any sign of cold put it on in his room . I do the same seems to really help. Have a look at reviews on net about them xx


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## carrie lou

Amanda, well done Noah on the potty training, that's great   Strangely Zac can tell me when he's doing a wee or poo but won't do them on the potty  


Ju, sorry Noah has croup - hope he gets better soon   

AFM, cycle cancelled - I have definitely ovulated    She could see a very clear collapsed follicle on the right which ties in with the pain I was getting. There is no way to be sure when this happened and it's too risky to guess, so we aren't going ahead. Strangely I feel ok about it. I want my snow baby back so much but only if everything is just right. The good news is if AF is on time, I can still fit in another cycle before Christmas


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## amandaloo

Carrie- really sorry   but glad you feel ok about it   . Well lets hope it's an excellent Christmas present     Have you seen the book pirate pete's potty ? I read it to Noah it's a potty training book might be worth a go x


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## margesimpson

Carrie -   that sucks! It'd be the best Christmas present! 

Pirate Pete rocks - that might've been the key to DS cracking the potty.

The humidifier's great for colds n stuff, but invaluable for croup. I spent many a night in a steamy bathroom when I was young and spent one night with DS like that before we bought the humidifier. Now he gets it full blast and we leave the door ajar. Better nights sleep for all. I'd definitely recommend the cool mist ones though, for safety, we've got the Vicks one. 

I also read a great piece of advice somewhere: when still having wee accidents overnight, make up both sides of the mattress with waterproof cover and fitted sheet and then if there's an accident just whip of the wet sheets and flip the mattress. Course Noah would've still beaten that trick!   We've not tried DS over night without a pull up yet as he's still got a wet nappy by morning, but at 3;6 I suppose we'll have to think about it soon? 
Hugs,
Mx


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## margesimpson

Oh yeah and I'm having a hairy canary over this cycle. Crinone (?!) gel pessaries start tonight. Want to try everything, so there's no if onlys.


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## amandaloo

Marge- you do right it's better to do everything than to have regrets . I'm glad there's another person that likes humidifiers . Noah got croup few times then I heard about it and I literally put it on if he has a sniffle nothing developed any further once I start using it 

Afm- well I'm going for iui tomorrow got my smily face a few mins ago


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## margesimpson

Omg that's exciting! Good luck babe, fingers crossed it all goes smoothly and it ends successfully with a bfp!
Mx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie so about your cycle.    But you're right, the frosttie needs a nice comfy home.   


Ju I've got a humidifier for Samuel. It really works.


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## juju81

Carrie, what a bummer hun.  Like you say tho you have to give it your best shot and if they aren't 100% happy thn there's no point.  He's to a fab Christmas for you  

Amanda, good luck today hun, you know I have everything crossed for you   come be in my gang  

Marge, Noah is still in pull ups.  Some mornings he's still wet but we had run out of them so thought I chance it! Won't be chancing it again for the foreseeable future! I'd say he's probably wet 3/7 morning so until its all the time there's no point worrying and it doesn't bother me he's still in them! 

I've got physio this arvo, and I'm on iron finally so hopefully will start perking up!


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## carrie lou

Amanda, good luck honey    


Thanks for the tips about Pirate Pete  He loves books so sounds like it's definitely worth a shot. Maybe for his Christmas stocking  


Juju, hope physio goes well  


AFM, still weirdly feeling OK, I thought I'd be massively disappointed about cancelling the cycle but I'm not too bad.. I guess the knowledge that my little frostie will wait patiently until I'm ready for it. Also I have an appointment with a "proper" counsellor on Monday. The NHS one is lovely but she just doesn't have enough time to give me the help I actually need. So I'm having to go private but it's worth it if it helps me put my life back together


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## ceci.bee

Carrie hun        so sorry your cycle was cancelled, but as you say if your body wasn't ready you can't waste your precious frostie putting it back to a less than ideal environment, and hope the timing will be better next month and keeping everything                    

Amanda                      

Hakuna how are you doing hun? sending big       and thinking of you, nothing about this journey is easy but you are doing an amazing job and will cope brilliantly with being a mum of 3

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## amandaloo

Hi


Iui went well      fingers crossed now. I'm feeling quite confident about this cycle not quite sure why. Although I do feel its better timed for some reason as my last one was very late ovulation this one isn't its more around middle of cycle. I can feel ovulation pain since this morning too. Anyway anything to try and stay positive


Juju- glad your all sorted . I wanna be in your gang your gang your gang   


Carrie- glad you feel ok about it all like Ceci says its better not to waste your frostie . I don't understand your FET mine was totally medicated . How does yours work as I downregged .


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## juju81

It's your turn for sure!

I love how predictive turns ceci into Cecil! Does it to me too


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## amandaloo

Lol oops   best change it !


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## carrie lou

Amanda, best of luck honey, I so hope this is your time   I'm having a natural cycle FET. My consultant said there wasn't much difference in success rates between natural and medicated. I'm monitored by scans until my lining and lead follicle are ready, then take my trigger shot, and have ET a week later. Then stay on cyclogest until 12 weeks.

Something odd happened today and I'm not sure what to think... DH told his brother (against my wishes) that we are trying for another baby. BIL emailed back and said he believes MIL is under the impression that I can't have any more children  Why she would think such a thing is beyond me. Years ago we sat them down and explained in detail about DH's fertility problem, heck we even showed them our donor's Xytex profile... Anyway, my worry is that if she's got this so wrong, what else has she "misunderstood"? Has she forgotten all about the donor too? How will she react when Zac is older and talks about it in front of her? What will she say when we tell her (  ) that I'm pregnant? Our relationship as you know is strained at best already so I certainly don't feel I can discuss things like this with her, and DH doesn't want to either. So should i just let her think what she wants to?  The thing is, I can just imagine her reaction one day when she claims we've been lying to her for years or whatever. I just can't believe what a lunatic she is


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

if she's forgotten then thats her problem!! Is DH able to have a convo to remind her? OR could BIL speak to her?


How is his dad now?


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## juju81

Carrie I would say don't fret about her forgetting.  A few people we have told forget.  I even other sometimes and wheni do talk about it they tend to go "oh yeah I forgot that's how Noah is here"! However, I obviously don't know your MIL and how she's likely to react if she's told in convo again?! Are they very old?


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## carrie lou

She is 66 and FIL is 63, but they act a lot older.   It's just that a similar thing happened a couple of years ago over Zac's christening, when they found out I wanted a humanist naming ceremony for him. MIL said I couldn't possibly because it was un-Christian, I replied well I'm not a Christian - and suddenly all hell broke loose. She said I'd been lying to her for years and pretending. Um excuse me I'd known them for 13 years by then and never made any secret of the fact, in fact it was the main reason they didn't want us getting married in the first place. I can just see a similar situation unfolding when she is reminded of how Zac was conceived. 


But do you know what, the more I think about it the more I don't actually give a damn what she thinks about anything - I have enough to deal with already. I just worry a bit about the fallout....


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## abcdefgh

Amanda - Good luck   . Really hope that this is the one. Do your clinic always do IUI the next day after an evening smiley face or is it just that they time it that way for you knowing how your body works? I was always told only to test in the morning and, even if I did test in the evening, to go off the first time I got a smiley face on the morning test so if I was in your position now I wouldn't be having IUI till tomorrow   Obviously they've timed it well for you if you've had ovulation pain though. I never get that so don't have a clue when I ovulate! 

Carrie - Sorry your cycle was cancelled but I'm glad you are feeling ok. It definitely sounds like waiting is by far the best plan for you and your embie. Did Mistletoe not have a kind of similar scenario? Lots of delays and frustration but in the end a BFP! I think some of the few people we have told also seem to have forgotten about our situation but it does seem weird that your MIL of all people would forget! They do sound very odd, though


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

It sounds like your MIL has blanked out he son's medical problem and put it on you. Of course it could never be her son's ''fault'' could it? My MIL is the same. When her other son's marriage broke up after 7 cycles of ivf and he was told his sperm count was so low it was unlikely they would ever conceive, suddenly it was the wife's pelvic inflammatory disease that was the whole reason. When he remarried and had a son this was proof it was never his prolem.

With us it is not her son's azoospermia, it is my age.
I've been told to use a donor is against their Catholic beliefs - but I have never seen any of them go to a Catholic mass in the last 15 years. There are children conceived out of wedlock on both brothers sides - but that does not count as they have had a Catholic christening, whereas my little boy will not be Christened. I am certainly not going to get Christened and certainly never ever as a Catholic, so I can't have my LO Christened either as it would be hypocritical.

Very very odd the lot of them!

Carrie - it took me 6 months of hard slog, a lot of drugs and heartache to get ready for my frostie, and I never thought it was going to happen. But all of a sudden it all dropped into place and now I am nearly 32 weeks.


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## carrie lou

Thanks Holly, I hope it all works out for me too   


Gosh that all sounds so very familiar. My in laws are catholic too but very devout and fundamentalist. They didn't want DH to marry me because I am "not of their faith" and now we are virtually outcasts from their family. But DH's cousins have children out of wedlock and they are welcomed with open arms because they have been baptised catholic, and relatives who have got divorced but it is always the other partner's fault. It all makes me a bit sick. Zac was christened C of E because that was DH's choice, and we had to endure the guilt trips because it wasn't catholic. If we have another child I will argue strongly not to have him/her baptised at all. DH hasn't been to church since last Christmas so it seems hypocritical, and I won't do it just to please other people.


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## carrie lou

And if our infertility is anyone's fault, it is theirs for not noticing or bothering to do anything about DH's undescended testicles until he was 7 years old


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## juju81

Carrie   like you say, stuff what yet think.  Nicks mum and nan wanted us to hae Noah Christianed.  We both said no because neither of us are religious. So we then thought about a naming ceremony but then we'd have problems choosing guardians and a bit like our wedding I thought sod it! I know that if something happened to Noah or this little one, my sister would take them into her family.  We do need to get that put in writing though as I could see MIL kicking off!

Holly, can't believe you're so near to the end   I found it flies by once you hit 20! I'm 19wkd today and wonder where the hell that went   am getting much stronger movement from her now, I reckon another week or 2 and we'll be able to feel her with our hands  

Had a dreadful night with Noah, I've got sciatic pains down my left and I'm off to right on to meet an old work colleague today


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## amandaloo

Carrie - sounds weird to me how can you forget something so significant about your own son ?? Might be in denial   . What are you going to do ? Like you said think you have enough on without having to have that discussion again  

Holly - wow time flys Doesn't it  . If my FET had worked I'd be where you are now  

Juju- did you look at humidifiers ? 

Abcde- yes they told me to test twice a day morn and night . If I got positive in morn I'd go next day positive in evening then next morning  go on that day if that makes sense . I always start ovulating at night never had a positive first time in Morning . All clinics seem to differ somehow   . Glad yours got it right xxx


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## juju81

Amanda, no ill look now!  Yeah I tested positive in the evening of the cycle Noah worked! Tested positive at 6pm and went in at 11 the next day  that what I found really stressful with IUI! My clinic never told me to test twice but I did as was so paranoid lol!


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## carrie lou

Interesting - with Zac I tested positive Monday evening, still positive Tuesday morning, but didn't go in for insemination until 11.30 on wednesday! Isn't it funny how much clinics can vary. I guess there must be more flexibility than we think


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## abcdefgh

Yeah, my clinic work in the same way as yours Carrie. Worrying about the timing used to drive me mad but it does look like there must be a relatively long window in which it can be done  

Ju - Hope you have a better night tonight  

Marge - How's the 2ww going? 

Hope everyone is having good weekend. xx


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## hakunamatata

hey girlies it appears my message from the other day didnt post. 
carrie youre doing so well hun, keep focussed on the end goal like youre doing xx
amanda and marge you can keep each other sane. hope youre right about this feeling amanda.
well i saw my two again today. im 10 weeks, just needed to see they were ok. both measuring spot on. top one wriggling about loads
happy weekend all xxx


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## margesimpson

My clinic told me that you ovulate 24-36 hours after the trigger shot so do the iui the day after the shot. 

Hak - good to hear they're doing we'll and not fighting too much over their favorite spot in there!  
Did you have to pay to get another scan? You haven't changed your profile yet.  Too superstitious?   

Carrie - how's the new counsellor? 

Juju - are you having Physio for the pain?

Amanda - how are you doing? Is time flying?

It's amazing - the time flies when you want to enjoy it and drags when you just want to get through it. The 2ww seems to be time standing still. We're not even half way through yet!   Symptom spotting? Me?


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## amandaloo

Margie- lol to symptom spotting me comment  ! I'm not too bad I've had a fair bit if cramping day after iui just feel uncomfortable today . Not symptom spotting just yet but early for 2 dpiui ha ha ! Anyway I've had every bloomin symptom you can have and still bfn's so don't believe them anyway ! Still doesn't stop me googling though ? Have you had anything ?

Hak - lovely news    glad all is ok xx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

New Home coming...........


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=315047.new#new

Here is your new home ladies (and gents if there are any joining us!)


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