# Back on the TTC rollercoaster!!



## Strawbs78

Hi all,

Im yet to read through the threads on here, I havent been on here for such a long time but I'll read through and get to know everyone's stories..

We have a wonderful 18m old baby boy and are now gearing up with the same donor to start TTC in just a couple of weeks.. I cant believe how quickly it has come around actually..  I am hopeful it will be a bit more relaxed this time round as we have done it before so I wont get so stressed out, famous last words ey!?!

Wish us luck!  

x


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## Jam&amp;Cream

Strawbs78,

Just wanted to say good luck xx


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## Coldilox

Hello, wishing you the best of luck adding to your family. 

AndLou - Sorry about the BFN


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## BecsW

Best of luck Strawbs! Welcome back to the crazy rollercoaster! x


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## Jam&amp;Cream

Coldilox, 

Thankyou, were having our next go this weekend. Hopefully a totally different result. 

AndLou xx


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## Strawbs78

thanks everyone, its nice to be back and getting ready to try again soon!!  If I could remember how to insert a dancing banana here I would haha x


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## Kezza78

Yay Jules, 

Looks like I'll be joining you! DTD yesterday morning, smiley face @1600. Not saying anything on ** group as no one knows were trying again. ( my friend is part of group). xx


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## Strawbs78

@  AndLou - good luck for next weekend!!!

@ Kezza - whoop whoop cycle buddies it is!  What is your OTD?  I am predicting my ovulation dates will be 30th April / 1st May (the predication part is really the part I find the most stressful) so Im guessing that puts me at a 13/14 OTD (always got a positive pregnancy test on day 12).. 

x


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## Kezza78

Hey Jules, 

AF is due 1st, gonna try and hold out on testing till its late ( she says lol)!! xx


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## Strawbs78

1st of May whoop whoop.. I always tested early, I just couldnt help myself.. I swear I kept clearblue in business!! x


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## Glitterintheair

Hi ladies, isnt it funny seeing our old names on here when we are so used to ******** now! Kezza I wish you the best of luck, my test date is 28th/29th so only just behind you. Xx


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## charlruk

Welcome back to the crazy roller coaster!!! Chelle and you were pregnant at the same time. Hope it isn't too long a journey for no2!! I am
12 weeks pregnant- i can't quite believe it really! 

Char


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## Strawbs78

Hey!!  Gosh it feels weird us all being back here at the same time..  12 weeks yay!!! congrats!  Charlie was born on the day I hoped Toby was born, he was officially due 4.11 but I had hoped he'd stretch to 11.11 but it wasnt to be..

I have done my best with my ovulation crystal ball and booked in to see our donor or the 30th and the 1st so a week tomorrow.. Not having seen him for two years I think it is going to be a bit surreal..  Got my AI kit in the mail today so its all quite real now.. 

Jules x


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## Pinktink

Hello     <<< for strawbs   


We are starting again as well!! Have our first appt on 4th June with a new clinic to make a plan! 


Can't believe we are all doing this again although you guys are slightly ahead of us - we are opting for a slightly bigger age gap!


Xxx


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## MadameCissy

Hi strawbs,

Just wanted to say good luck!!! Keeping everything crossed. Currently in the dreaded 2ww. My OTD is May 5th...


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## Strawbs78

PT - yay for you too! June is literally around the corner!  If I wasnt turning 35 in September we would have opted for a bigger age gap as well.  Toby is quite a handful so dealing with two young ones will be a challenge but age is not on my side unfortunately!  I keep telling myself it wont work first time and I need to be chilled about it but there is a small voice in the back of my mind that keeps wishing it did, I guess that will never go away!

MC - another cycle buddy, brilliant!! so much easier when you have other people doing it at the same time.  5th of May is so close!!  I remember how long the 2ww felt, it felt like everything literally stopped, Ive got it all crossed for you.

Are you all doing anything differently yet?  I hardly drink at all since having Toby, maybe a few glasses of wine a month so that's covered, I started taking vitamins a while ago but have just switched to Centrum pregnancy care (before and during pregnancy support), upped my water consumption to help with CM and that's about it really.

x


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## MadameCissy

I haven't had alcohol since January. I am not a drinker anyway (don't like the taste of it at all). I have cut out caffeine out completely and at the moment I am not even drinking tea. Before the AI I was only drinking rooibos/red bush tea because it's naturally decaf. Since today I just don't fancy hot drinks at all. I live on fruit smoothies, milk and water.  I've been eating really well, making sure to take in protein and my fruit and veggies. I have felt like absolute sh*t today, from nauseau to tired to grumpy and bloated. I am trying not to read anything into it as it's so early. I take my pregnacare tablets and vitamine B. I've been taken them for months. Never too early, eh?


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## Strawbs78

MC - Ive switched to 1 decaf coffee a day and decaf earl gray (one a day) but well done for cutting it all out completely!  When I was pregnant I couldnt face tea or coffee til I was about 8 months along so you never know!!

I found it impossible not to symptom spot on my 2ww so Im sure I'll be analysing all my symptoms again this time around.  Both times I fell pregnant about 7-8 days in to my 2ww I flew in to a rage for a couple of days, i was just so seriously hacked off with everything and everyone that is how dw predicted I was pregnant the 2nd time..  Always got a negative on day 11 and a positive on day 12 so hopefully if I fall pregnant again my 2ww will be just a little shorter and I get a positive on the 12.

x


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## Strawbs78

Oh and Im also doing slimming world (pretty loosely if Im honest) as Im still carrying around a stone of baby weight, Ive lost 6lbs so far so Im hoping the more I lose the more it will help x


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## Strawbs78

I just noticed these are on sale on amazon, they are the more advanced version of the CB smiley face stick which work like the monitor i.e. giving you high days and peak days.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Clearblue-Advanced-Digital-Ovulation-Test--Pack/dp/B00BSNL77I/ref=sr_1_11?ie=UTF8&qid=1366795611&sr=8-11&keywords=clearblue

ANd

CB digi preg tests are on sale

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Clearblue-Digital-Pregnancy-Conception-Indicator/dp/B000KKI1F6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1366795850&sr=8-1&keywords=clearblue

x

/links


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## Strawbs78

Im finding it quite ridiculous how nervous I am ahead of tomorrow!!  Lets hope I get my Peak in the morning!!

Everyone doing OK?

x


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## MadameCissy

Fingers crossed you get your peak!!!

As for the doing ok? I think I've lost whatever small amount of marbles I still had....   

This waiting game is cruel.


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## Strawbs78

No peak this morning, typical.  In the past three months Ive never had more than 5 highs on the monitor before but today I am day 6.  I am praying for a peak tomorrow.  Seeing my donor tonight and tomorrow morning as on Thursday he goes on holiday so it feels all a little for nothing at the moment as the only times it worked for me was when I did it on my peak days.  Trying to stay positive though! x


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## MadameCissy

Bloody typical, isn't it? Just when we want our body to do what we want it to do, it doesn't do it. When we watched my ovulation this cycle, the smiley arrived on Saturday. Normally it stays that way all day and the next morning and then goes negative again. I usually feel ovulation early on that second day of smileys so was expecting to ovulate on Sunday. Surprise surprise, I had ovulation pains by 9 pm Saturday night and ovulated earlyy; an hour and a half before the first insemination and 8 hours before the second one. By Sunday morning the smiley was gone. Our bodies just don't want to listen!


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## Strawbs78

Well the deed is done! Am seeing him again at 7am tomorrow. Really hoping I peak in the morning. He has told me tonight he is away for my next ovulation time (based on our guesstimates) so if a bfn this time we won't try again til end of June which is disappointing but ill be able to hopefully pick up some cycle pattern by then x


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## MadameCissy

If ours if a BFN we won't try again till June either. Looks like we're in this together!


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## Strawbs78

Yep totally! Got my smiley face this morning but still high on the monitor. I'm sure that I used to get a smiley face the day before I got a peak on the monitor so we will see. Had really hoped I would have leaked today to give me a fighting chance.  This is the frustrating part is not having it on tap! I am hoping at least it will keep my excitement on nerves in check as if we did it on peak days I'm sure I would have convinced myself that it worked first time! X

How are you feeling? X


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## Strawbs78

Peaked not leaked!!!! Bloody iPhone


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## MadameCissy

Keep in mind that fresh samples do live for quite a long period of time. It could very well be enough! Do you get one day of smileys or more? I literally get 24 hours and often ovulate that same day or very early the next.


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## Kezza78

Good luck Strawbs. BFN here, AF showed up 2 days early 😔. Nevermind just gotta keep trying😊xx


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## Strawbs78

First smiley face today so not sure how many I will get, I'm fresh out of those sticks too!
Given I use the monitor I won't buy any more smiley sticks (she says now).

Kezza - so sorry babe xxxx you ok? X


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## Kezza78

I'm fine, was a bit disappointed but you've just got to carry on. I'm hoping it will happen eventually ☺xx


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## MadameCissy

I'm so sorry Kezza.


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## Strawbs78

Morning ladies, I have a question about CM (gross I know sorry), I got my smiley face yesterday morning but high on th monitor, late afternoon and well in to the evening every time I went to the loo I had so CM - tmi alert - so much the toilet paper couldn't contain it all if you catch my drift - this morning I got my peak and CM wise it's back to normal - do you think I could have ovulated yesterday ? 

How are we all this morning?
X


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## Kezza78

I'd say you'll probably Ovulate today Strawbs, CM just creates a good environment for the swimmers to stay in. Sounds like your timing is spot on!! xx


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## Strawbs78

Morning babe,


Do you think as I inseminated Tuesday and Wednesday that it wasnt just a bit too early? Ive only ever had success inseminating on the actual peak days. x


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## Kezza78

As long as there was plenty of CM (and by sounds of it there was) you'll be fine. They can survive up to 5 days. Fingers crossed babe xx


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## Strawbs78

Mc how you doing? X


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## MadameCissy

I tested today - 13dpo- and it was still a BFN. Due AF tomorrow and I normally spot a day or two before but nothing yet. I don't feel like AF is coming but the BFN is saying different, I guess. I was ready for it and although I am dissapointed, I am not devastated. I'll give it another go in the morning and then wait and see if the witch shows her face. If she does, we'll try again in June. I can't imagine a test magically turning positive this late in the game.


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## Strawbs78

Mc you never know but ill keep it all crossed for you!!! If not we will be trying again together in June I'm sure.. This ttc lark is draining! If its is a bfn treat yourself to something you would miss if you were prego and enjoy it! X


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## MadameCissy

Well, well, well.,... this just goes to show you can NEVER believe anything a pregnancy test shows. I got my   this afternoon at 5 pm, twelve hours after getting an initial negative. Stunned. Can't believe it.


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## ♥JJ1♥

Congratulations - I swear by CB digitals!!! Xxx


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## MadameCissy

The daze hasn't worn off yet - hence why I'm awake at 3.30 am!. But I am now terrified its going to be a chemical... Guess this whole anxiously waiting thing isn't over yet


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## Strawbs78

As you have done it at home with no drugs I dont thinks it is anything other than genuine. Have you tested again this morning? X


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## Strawbs78

Oh and ps you thought the 2ww was bad now you are in the dreaded 12ww! X


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## MadameCissy

Thanks for that lol! I didn't test this morning as I was up half the night, peeing about 4 times every hour so reckon urine could have been very diluted. May sit on it a couple of days. At work today. Teamleader says she is happy but has a face that could turn milk sour. Only sees the stress of having a pregnant member of staff. What a way to make someone feel happy!


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## Strawbs78

You've told work already? Don't let them make their staffing issues your problem. Your wee won't be diluted hon unless you are also having drinks through the night x


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## MadameCissy

I have to tell work because of the situation here. Our residents are rather aggressive and pregnant staff have to be removed from those situations ASAP. Can't really afford not to tell as I would put myself and bean at risk.

I did drink through the night as I was so thirsty and then I slept through alarm, almost making me late for work. Felt really nauseous all morning and then side my starving hungry by 4 pm. (.)(.) tender and they feel hughe lol! I'll probably test again tomorrow or Tuesday


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## MadameCissy

Just something that crept up in my mind... If I test with a different hpt (out of cb digi), will that one still be positive? I know CB digi is good for early testing and I was only due today so would others pick it 
up? Especially since my fmu test yesterday was negative first? Could there be a difference in how sensitive they are? Been thinking about that all day.


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## Mish3434

MC, Congratulations, fab news 

Shelley x


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## Jam&amp;Cream

Madamecissy,

Congratulations, gives me some hope for our next go. 

AndLou x


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## MadameCissy

Thank you! Took a Clear Blue plus tonight and its another  ... So I guess that confirms it for real.. 3 positives in 24 hours.. 

If anything, I have learnt not to give up hope even when you think it's all gone. Life is full of surprises and little miracles and I   that everyone who so desperately wants a child, will have their wish fullfilled.


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## Strawbs78

Yay!! Excellent news!! Now it's just a waiting game, enjoy every moment x


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## MadameCissy

How are you getting on, Strawbs?


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## Strawbs78

I'm getting on fine, feel totally normal but I'm only 6dpo so I'm pretty chilled for now. Back end of this week may be a different story though haha.. X


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## MadameCissy

I am keeping everything crossed.


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## Strawbs78

The last 7 days since I saw our donor has gone pretty quickly tbh but I fear the next 7 are going to go quite slowly!  I got the peak on last Thursday so do you think I count forward 14 days from then?  I want to test on day 12 so Im thinking to be safe maybe Tuesday / Wednesday next week.  When I was pregnant before (both times) I was always negative day 11 but positive day 12.

How are you feeling MC?

Gem - Im sure you arent on here at the moment but hope you are ok..

Is everyone else getting on ok?

x


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## MadameCissy

This morming (or any other time of the day, for that matter!) sickness is quite something. Some days I get lucky and I barely have any but today has been the worst so far. About an hour ago I actually stood by he salad bar in Morrisons, ready to puke my guts up. The roast chicken counter had the same effect. It was awful.

Other than that I am on knicker watch both for blood and CM. Not seen any blood but plenty of CM. (TMI, sorry!)

Any news at your end, Strawbs?


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## Strawbs78

I had ms from the day I took the test to the day I had him so I feel your pain, I ended up getting medicated as I was heaving up to 27 times a day and was so dehydrated I had no blood I'm my arm veins which they discovered when trying to do a blood test. Ice is your friend, ice cold drinks and callipos - also sucking on fruity polos helps.

I'm ok, not really feeling much outside of being v tired but who isn't with an 18m old and I seem to be a bit scatty, I tried yesterday to put a pot out of the dishwasher in to the freezer!! Lets hope it is something and not me going mad haha.. Ill test on Tuesday which is day 12 x


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## MadameCissy

Hahahaha I had to laugh about the pot from the dishwasher into the freezer bit. My brain seems to have shrunk to half it's original size. I walk into a room and forget what I came to do, I keep looking for things in the wrong places or put them somewhere strange. It's bizarre and makes people laugh.

My mum told me to put some plain biscuits next to my bed so I can eat something as soon as I wake up and knock the first waves of nausea on the head. Worked this morning!


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## Glitterintheair

Hi ladies, 

I'm back with a heavy heart but I know my incredible step-dad would want me to keep trying for a baby so I inseminated last night and haven't peaked yet. He donated at 10 pm and I inseminated and went to sleep straight away - for a full 8 hours (unheard of for me!!) I'm hoping the sperm have burrowed away nicely for an egg to join them maybe tomorrow. Do you guys think it was too early? Gem xxxxx

P.S Thank you for all your kind words xxx


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## Strawbs78

Depends on when you peak gem, if its tomorrow then they say that that should be fine. It only worked for me on the peak but everyone is so different.

Really hope you are ok, it is so hard to lose someone like that.

X


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## MadameCissy

I'm with Strawbs. Depends on when you peak but I am keeping everything crossed for you. It's a terrible thing to lose someone you love and I hope and pray that things will turn out positive!


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## Glitterintheair

Thank you ladies, it was a bit difficult as I'm on a 24 hour shift from today at 2 pm until tomorrow 2 pm so I had to go for it really  fingers crossed they're ready and waiting   xx


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## Glitterintheair

Still no peak but kind of expected that due to the recent emotions i've gone through. I am hoping to maybe inseminate again tomorrow if I peak in the morning. xxx


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## MadameCissy

I am   you'll get your peak tomorrow, Gem! If there's one thing I've learnt it's that thins have a way of creeping up on us when we least expect it. I am keeping fingers and toes crossed for you.


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## Strawbs78

I think it is brilliant that you can insem again with your donor, defo try to get another one or two in.  Keeping it crossed. x

did an early test this morning (day 11 so far too early but I couldnt help it) and it was a bfn.  I'll retest again in a couple of days and see where Im at x


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## Glitterintheair

Thank you ladies, I feel that even if it doesn't work this month I know that at least I tried during this time of emotional stress and it keeps my mind occupied. If I can insem again tomorrow I will but it may have to be next month now. It's ok, time will tell. It took me 18 months last time so no reason why it won't take that long again though of course I'm praying it will be quicker! 

Strawbs best of luck for the next few days xxx


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## Strawbs78

Lets hope it doesnt take that long this time Gem and you get your little miracle.  Is your donor generally quite available? Hopefully he is! 

I posted a very interesting thing about sensititivies of pregnancy tests on the ** group, check it out if you are about to buy any! x


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## Glitterintheair

I peaked!     xx


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## MadameCissy

Yaaay!!!! Keeping fingers, toes, legs and arms crossed!!


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## Glitterintheair

Thank you, may potentially be too late but who knows. Going to email him and ask for a second donation so we'll see    xx


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## Strawbs78

that's great news babe, that means you will ov in the next 24-32 hours, brilliant!

did another test this morning and not even a whiff of a second line so unless there is some kind of miracle between now and thursday its a bfn for me this month! x


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## Strawbs78

Even if he cant today but can tomorrow defo do it x


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## Glitterintheair

Aw strawbs it may change in 48 hours   I'm waiting to hear back from him but may go for another overnight one, he'll donate tonight and I'll go straight to sleep after insemination xx


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## MadameCissy

Strawbs, remember what happened to me? BFN in the morning, BFP in the afternoon... Don't count yourself out just yet  

Gemma, keeping fingers and toes firmly crossed!


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## Glitterintheair

My donors on his way!


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## Strawbs78

I've got it all crossed for you gem x


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## Strawbs78

Gem how are you getting on?

Mc - how is your recovery going?

X


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## MadameCissy

Strawbs, I wish I knew what to make of the whole mc. It's dragging on which is leaving me tired and confused. I kinda feel left in the dark as at our last hospital appointment no one really told us what to expect. Google is more of an enemy than a friend at times like these. It's been a little over a week since I was admitted to hospital and a week and a half since they first diagnosed a likely miscarriage. Since then have barely lost any red blood at all - mostly pinkish with red dots and lots of brown. It stopped a week ago on Sunday - which I thought was the end of my mc- and then started again yesterday. It is mainly brown or lots of mucus mixed with pink and the occasional speck of red. I haven't passed any clots bigger than the size of a pinhead (and that only happened twice - nothing that looks like lining etc. During a period I lose clots the size of walnuts! sorry, tmi) and I am in no pain. No more cramps since that Saturday night. 

I wish someone had warned me about the persistent symptoms. My morning sickness (and all day queasiness) is just cruel and my sore (.)(.) are more of a problem now than before. Thought I was ovulating on Friday because there was loads of egg white cm. opk gave a smiley but the only way to know for sure it wasn't hcg turning the test positive was take hpt too. Digi still says 2-3 weeks so hcg still in my system and, when I looked up the guidelines for clearblue digi, levels have to be 200 or higher to get a 2-3 week result, meaning my hcg has dropped less than 300 in a week whereas before it dropped with 300 in two days. frustrating. I have another week before docs said it should be gone but it seems to drop very slowly. I just want my body to go back to normal so we can focus on the next attempt and I could do without the pg symptoms because they are just cruel. I feel alright in myself, is just the not knowing and not getting ahead that's frustrating me.  

How are things at your end? X


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## Glitterintheair

Strawbs,

How are you honey? I saw your post on ** and hope that your G.P can help you at your appointment, it sounds like something hormonal as we have both found our cycles go all over the place when we are TTC, keep in touch and hoping it gets sorted soon 

As for me, I'm ok. Had a very bizarre month emotionally and now waiting for AF to arrive any second! I inseminated on the Saturday as expected peak was Sunday, I didn't peak until tuesday and inseminated that night too, so really I am thinking AF will be here today or tomorrow. I haven't even bought a test this month (last month I emptied Boots of their stock!) and have no desire to test and put myself through the hell of last month - I really think I had a nervous breakdown last month but I didn't talk about it on ********. I was hysterical to the point of wondering why I was back on this journey....I worked through it a lot with my acupuncturist and am getting somewhere now. I've got all normal premenstrual symptoms and am just sitting it out. However my boobs are absolutely on fire  my poor girlfriend is not happy 

*MadameCissy* - we have talked a lot in messages but I truly feel for you  - it is so hard to go through a miscarriage and I remember willing mine to hurry up so I could conceive again. You are doing really well and have a lovely partner to support you. When are you back at work? Thinking of you lots xx

Gem xx


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## MadameCissy

Gem, so sorry to hear that your symptoms this month don't point at your dream.   I keep   you may get an unexpected surprise. You deserve it so much.


I have another week off work. I am scheduled to go back the 3rd of June but if my hpt isn't negative by then I'll have to go back to hospital and get things sorted. Seems odd. I never wanted a test to be negative so badly!


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