# Any over 40s just starting ivf cycle ?



## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi ladies

Well I started my second ivf cycle yesterday ( on short protocol bemfola and menopur) . Really nervous , had ivf in August which resulted in BFN , praying it works this time . I know my odds aren't great been taking DHEA for 5 months and ubiquinol plus proxeed ...... so hoping it has improved my egg quality  

IVF is a real drain emotionally and financially.....so just looking for some ladies in similiar situation , to help get through this 

Kate


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Hi just a quick reply to wish you good luck with your ivf  . I've been through quite a few cycles so not just starting out, but I can relate to the financial and emotional/energy drain involved! You just have to keep going if it's something you really want and look after your self as much as you can. 

I tried DHEA but my current clinic told me not to bother with it. I've ordered some more ubiquinol though & taking melatonin for egg quality. I'll be doing a Clomid freezing cycle when my period eventually shows up. 

All the best x


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## scattykatty (Aug 1, 2016)

Just wanted to say all the best too - I'm about to start stimms for my second IVF cycle - my first in November ended in silent MC. Am taking melatonin, dhea and ubiquinol in slightly higher doses this time and am also having menopur which is possibly linked to better egg quality. Here's hoping. Are you able to put your nerves in to something else? This cycle I've felt much better so I'm working as much as I can to distract myself. That said, the anxiety creeps out in other ways... 

I know what you mean about finances and emotions... I guess every now and then I try to remember what's really important and, as long as I'm not putting my marriage or house at risk, I'm trying to think 'it's only money...' (but that will only last another 2 cycles or so I reckon)... 

All this sounds so trite... Sorry! But wishing you all the v v best x


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

We had our initial consultation last Tuesday and are starting next cycle. I'm 42 and so is hubby, well nearly.
We've been advised that long protocol is best and I'm having doubts about it now (it always takes me a while to process the information given) as I'm unsure that it's the most suitable for us as she's also suggested high stimulation as I only had 4 follicles on pre-treatment scan which I've heard varying opinions on.
Do you mind me asking why your consultant suggested short protocol and what dosage you'll be on?

Sending lots of babydust your way! <3


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Dear strawberry sundae 
Thanks for your response ... I must admit I'm not too sure about this DHEA only taking it as there has been mixed reports regarding improving egg quality ... it seems to have made me more acne prone but thought it not that long that I have to take it now thank god ..

Dear Scattykatty hope your second cycle goes well , this is my second cycle too ... I'm 43 in April so I'm not sure how many times you should try with your own eggs or move to donor eggs? It's such a lottery from what I've been reading . I'm trying to keep busy as much as I can , although I've taken this coming week off work as I needed to take some time off but going to make sure I catch up with friends and family I think. 

Nesfastie hi I hope you're well , I wouldn't worry about which protocol you are on I think they all seem to have similiar rates of success . The nurse asked me whether I wanted long or short protocol , i asked "which does the consultant advise ? " she just said "it's up to you " ...... I was gobsmacked . No advice or guidance .... just "it's up to you " ... 
first time I had ivf in August last year I paid private and went to CARE Notts ... treatment cost £7500 (ivf and ICSI) . This time I'm at CRM £3250 ( ivf & Icsi) .... but it's self funded NHS treatment .... didn't even know there was such thing as NHS self funded thought the only option was private and of course the consultants don't tell you as they are the ones earning the extra money from private treatments ... funnily enough I have the same consultant as last time .... first time I did short protocol ivf and was on 300iu final f and 150 menopur .... don't worry about the predicament ... originally they only saw 5 follicles by day of collection they got 9 , however only 7 were mature , 5 fertilised ... only 2 made it to day 5 blastocysts so I had the 2 transferred but they were poor quality ...... result BFN  

This second cycle I'm scanned by the nurse , she didn't tell me if she could see and follicles ... I'll ask Tuesday when I go for my next scan ... I've been put on 225 bemfola and 150 menopur ....... I should have started my ivf cycle last month but at the scan they found a cyst on my ovary so they had to cancel ivf ... I went on Friday and the cyst has now cleared so they said I can start treatment . The thing I find weird is last month before they scanned me they were going to put me on 150 bemfola and 150 menopur but the cyst prevented treatment starting . This month it's 225 bemfola and 150 menopur .... no explanation and you only see they nurse not the consultant .. the nurses are very knowledgeable I just would have liked some reassurance as to the rationale in the change in treatment / dosage. They also didn't explain pros and cons re long or short protocol just offered me the choice .... how do you make a choice if your not informed re each protocol .... so I can only assume there is very little between them ... 

I wish you ladies the best of luck with your treatments , thanks for the support 
Kate   Xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

I'm my last post it should read 300 gonal F ( not final)


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Also should read prescan not predicament .., note to self check message before posting .... predictive text and thumb typing ... apologies


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

Thanks twinkletoes42!
We are actually NHS funded at CARE Northampton but were briefly with Mr Kay at CRM (if that's Coventry?) but had to move to clinic approved by our trust.
Judging by your experience there doesn't seem a lot of difference but it would still be great to have that explained to one by the consultant.
Luckily we are not starting for another few weeks, so hopefully will get some reassurance from them by then.

Wishing you all the best and lots of babydust!!! <3


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi nesfastie
I hope you get the answers re LP versus SP , I'm not sure how many attempts I want to try with OE as it really is tough . I've only had one failed cycle and that was hard enough .. I read on this forum of ladies trying 5-6 times with OE . I desperately want my own genetic child but I'm not sure I have their strength to do so many cycles . 

I'm praying this one works  
I wish you all the very best and lots of baby dust for your next cycle 

Kate x


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi scattykaty 

Have yo stated your cycle of ivf yet ? I've been taking stims since Friday .... I had a scan yesterday , the nurse could see 6 follicles on my right ovary possible 1 in the left ovary ( she said that ovary is lazy ) .. fingers crossed I get a few more before EC . 
My last cycle they got 9 , 5 fertilised ... 2 blastos made it to day 5. But BFN ..... egg quality was believed to be poor .... so I'm hoping more follies would give a better probability of getting just one ok  

Still trying to keep busy .... hope your cycle is going well x


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

Keeping fingers crossed for you Twinkletoes <3


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Hi ladies, 

I am 40, 41 in August. I had my 5 day transfer yesterday. 2 blastocyts  at high quality transferred. Waiting game now. 

Good luck everyone


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Nesfastie 

Thanks for the message ...I'm trying to remember from last time how long I was taking the stims for... can't seem to recall how many days I was taking them 1st cycle . Oh well I'm sure my EC will come round soon enough ...  

Hi Chamomilae

Fantastic 2 blastocysts and high quality too .... I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you 🍀🍀🍀🍀
2 week wait seems to take ages to pass but hey you've got through all the treatment which is good .... 
wishing you all the best and lots of baby dust 

Kate x


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Ladies,

Do you mind if I join you?  Its encouraging to read your stories from ladies in the same age group!
I have just started my 3rd and most likely final self-funded private IVF/ICSI - trying to stay positive, though feel that realistically my age is a major hurdle.

Ive had really good responses to stims in my previous 2 cycles, but unfortunately seem to not progress after 5 day transfers.  The first cycle with Gonal F got me to 1 heartbeat at 8 weeks but MMC (with mild OHSS requiring cabergoline) - 17 eggs collected. 
I moved and so the second cycle was at another clinic - changed from Gonal F to Menopur, still high doses (375 I think) - and stimms again went very well, but I seem to have prematurely ovulated and lost my follicles prior to theatre - retrieved 6 in the end (presumably immature ones that hadn't ruptured) and again good fertilisation rates, and probably better quality as 3 made it to 5 day blasto and were suitable for freezing (whereas on the Gonal F, I had 5 at day 5 but apparently none suitable for freezing).

I took DHEA with the second cycle, but now too scared to take anything in case that's what pushed me to have a surge of hormone leading to ovulation.  I still think the drug doses have been too high for me, as I had good baseline bloods and good baseline scan follicle count etc, so do I really need such aggressive stimulation?

Anyway, here we go again - hoping for a miracle this time.  I'm on the menopur again but 325 this time.  I have asked not to be pushed too far in stimms.

I also had nasal sprays for down reg on both previous cycles, and now I'm having the Buserelin injections.

Anyway, I hope you are all hanging in there and my very best and positive wishes to you all.

I will have a read through and catch up with your stories today...

So I'm now on day 8 of down reg, and apparently EC should be week commencing 17/4 if all goes to plan...

Take care and look forward to chatting,
S.


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi SJS75,

Of course you can join our thread , I really hope your cycle is going well. 

I know what you mean about age being against us. I had my 1st cycle in August last year , I was on the short protocol gonal F (300) and menopur (150 ) . At EC they got 9 eggs 7 were mature , 5 fertilised got to day 5 and only 2 blastocysts survived had day 5 transfer but BFN  
I was absolutely gutted , I don't know I'd naively built myself up into thinking it would work ignoring what the stars say. 

Anyway on my second cycle now again short protocol , been taking bemfola 225 and menopur 150 . It's self funded NHS so I only get to see the nurses never able to question the consultant . I'm on Day 7 of stims ... got another scan tomorrow ... they saw 6 follies on my right ovary possible 1-2 on my left at my last scan trying not to get my hopes up . I'm taking DHEA and ubiquinol not sure if it will have any effect on egg quality ... I read another ladies diary on here about her struggles with IVF an whilst it was sad in some places one think really made me laugh ... She wrote about taking different supplements and said .... I'd take dried unicorn horn if I thought it would give me a better chance at conceiving .... she then wrote but then again if it didn't work .... I'd only go on to blame myself for not taking mermaids dandruff ... it really did make me chuckle ... I too am desperate to use my own eggs to conceive but I think if thinks don't work out this time I'll be moving to DE. 

Well let me know how you're getting during your cycle , wishing you lots of luck 🍀🍀🍀 
Kate
X


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

That should read ignoring what the stats say not stars doh !lol 😂
And things not thinks ..... predictive text ... so annoying


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## Athena2017 (Mar 8, 2017)

Hi ladies - i am 41 and doing my first IVF/ICSI cycle.  I was on Gonal F 225, 4 eggs collected, 3 of which fertilised.  I had ET yesterday; they put in 2 embryos (1 x 2 cell and 1 x 4 cell)   for the 2WW now.  Trying to keep distracted, calm and positive.  We're self funded so it'll be the only chance for us to afford the IVF option.  Trying to keep level headed about it all.

Sending best wishes to you all x


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Athena2017

Wishing you all the very best , try to keep distracted during the 2ww. Wishing you lots of baby dust  
Kate 
X


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

Hi SJS75, good luck with your down reg, keep us uptodate on how you get on. 

Athena, you are PUPO <3 sending lots of sticky babydust your way! 

I sent email to my consultant Sunday night and obviously no response as yet, will phone up tomorrow to chivvy them along I think.


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## happybabe (Jan 8, 2017)

Hi,
I am over here in London at the ARGC clinic, just wondering if there is anyone else cycling here at the min from Ireland, it's all a bit daunting!
Esp nurse mentioned yesterday before I got my blood results that I might not be starting this month! After me paying a months deposit on an apartment and getting temp leave from my work! I nearly cried! In fact I did cry! Anyway turned out my bloods are  to start, fsh is slightly raised but that is due to my thyroid.... oh and yes of course my age! 43..44 coming my way next month..
Anyway that is me.. having an hysteoscopy tom.. then please g start the meds..
How are you all getting in , what clinics are you attending! Xxxx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi happybabe 
I hope they start you on your medication soon . What a rollercoaster and logistical nightmare travelling from Ireland to sort your treatment I. London . Hope all goes well  

Athena I echo nesfastie,s comment PUPO lots of luck and best wishes x

nesfastie have you had an update from your consultant yet hope things start progressing for you soon x

I went for my scan today seems 4 follicles s on right ovary have got to 20 mm 2-3 follicles  on left but still only small 7mm so taking last of stims tonight .... tomorrow is trigger injection ..., EC Monday ... I'm panicking a bit that  I don't have many follicles and those on my right ovary have developed much more than my left ... I guess they can't wait for left to catch up so Monday it is .. god I hope I get just one quality embryo ... it's such a bloody lottery . 
Ladies I hope you are all ok .

Kate


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Thank you for wishes Kate

Athena2017 we seem to be at same stage of the 2ww, had my implantation on the 21/3, testing on the 1/4, hopefully a good April's fool . Good luck to you. We keep in touch. 

I have been very anxious on the last couple of days as I experienced period like pain. My period was due today. No bleeding so far but very worried. Still hoping. Ladies, have you experienced any post implantation pain in your previous ivf cycles.


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Everyone, 

Thanks very much for the welcome and good wishes, Kate and Nefastie.

Firstly just want to wish you all the very best for EC today, Kate - thinking of you and everything crossed for a good number of eggs collected, and of course that all goes well for you physically, that you'll recover quickly and not too much pain/discomfort.
It seems like we had a very similar cycle last time though I have only done long protocols.  I am also very keen to do OE and have my own children (my husband has 2 sons, so in a way, that would be a similar feeling for me if I did DO and his sperm - it would be another child that is his and not genetically mine).  Anyway lots of luck and baby dust for this cycle - I keep hoping that this time of year with the Spring etc, perhaps we'll have more luck!

StrawberrySundae, hope your AF comes very soon so that you can get started.  Are you doing a freezing cycle for egg banking?

Scattykatty, hello again - we cycled together in Nov if I remember correctly.  Sorry to hear that your Nov cycle did not progress as hoped.  I also had MMC at 10 weeks the first time - devastating.  Glad to see you're back for another cycle and lots of luck and baby dust to you!  
I'm also doing Menopur again this time and really hoping if the follies don't rupture like last time with Menopur, I'd have a better chance with improved quality as opposed to the Gonal F the first time. I do think the quality with Menopur last cycle must have been better if Oxford would not freeze any for me (when I did Gonal F) and yet Nuture were willing to free last time (with Menopur) even though I imagine it wasn't the best of my eggs due to the rupture and loss of the leading ones.  I'm having a slightly lowered dose of Menopur this time, so fingers crossed. Are you in Nottingham too?

Nefastie, hope you got a response to your email now and can move forward soon...

Chamomilae and Athena2017 - congrats to you both on your transfer of 2, and being PUPO!  Keeping everything crossed for you Chamomilae for 1st April and for you Athena for whenever you OTD is.  It's tough I the 2WW. Hope you're keeping busy!

Happybabe - I can't imagine how tough it is to be away from home and have all the logistics of sorting out work arrangements etc.  Hope things are going to plan now and that all will go smoothly for you so that you can get home soon and relax a little...

AFM, I have completed 10 days downreg now, looking forward to starting the stimms.  I have my downreg scan in a week's time 3/4.  I'm not taking DHEA this time (hope that's not going to compromise quality).  Trying to relax as much as possible and pace myself work-wise.  I'm using some of my annual leave to work shorter weeks at the moment to try to make life easier and less stressful.  I'm eating as healthily as possible - its so hard to know what may help, or whether it's not likely to influence anything now...

It would be great for us all to meet up if anyone fancies a little get together sometime?

Hang in there girls, and hope you all have a good day. 

S.


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi ladies
Well had my EC today ... just 5 eggs 😔. My last cycle they got 9 and it ended in BFN so bit worried now .... 
I guess only time will tell ....  

Xx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Good luck Twinkletoes, pupo ladies and everyone  

SJS yes I'll be doing freezing and sort of banking, but only for about 1 month, as we paid for 2 cycles. I went to Care Notts previously too, would be nice to meet up with others near there.

I'm still not cycling yet as no AF   Will see consultant if not arrived by next week. Think I'm a bit run down as got mouth sores etc and been so busy lately.

All the best x


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Ladies,

Congrats Twinkletoes on your 5 eggs. I know you're worried but you only need 1 good one as they say. You might find you'll have enough to fertilise and be there for selection for transfer. Stay positive (hard to do I know!). Keeping everything crossed for you...Hang in there!!

Strawberry - hope AF comes soon - how annoying! I was delayed last time waiting for AF but it usually sorts itself out in the end. Good luck for your freezing, hope you get lots to bank.

S


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

For some reason, i hadn't received any notifications since last week, so think just caught up with all your news.

1st is not long now for OTD, keeping my fingers crossed 

5 eggs are plenty, have you had an update today?

How is everyone doing today?

I phoned secretary yesterday morning and she was going to investigate why I hadn't heard anything as yet, when I still hadn't heard from her, I phoned again this morning and no email was received and consultant was going to ring me later. Nurse had missed out the all important . between first and surname :/
I then forwarded my email to actual email address as thought might make life easier for our phone conversation and then had an email reply this afternoon from consultant as follows:
"You have questioned why I would recommend the long protocol as some clinics believe that a short protocol is better for the older woman with fewer follicles. In our clinic we recommend the long protocol as we have found better success rates with this in women with a low ovarian reserve. Clinics do differ in the way they approach the same situation and there is no definite proof that the short or the long protocol would be better in your situation. I would definitely recommend a long protocol due to the experience in our clinic. 

You have asked whether the high stimulation doses would compromise your egg quality. The reason for putting you on the maximum doses is to actually try and achieve a response. Unfortunately, if we put you on lower doses of drugs there is a high risk of cycle cancellation due to failure to respond to the stimulation. The short protocol may result in fewer eggs and not necessarily of a better quality.

I hope that this answers all your queries."

I guess this should reassure me but somehow it doesn't.  

Are there any of you ladies or someone you know, who 
- had unexplained secondary infertility (had 5 losses but no living children), 
- only 4 follicles or similar on pre-treatment antral follicle scan 
and were put on long protocol with high stimulation on Gonal F and Menopur?

Haven't spoken to hubby yet but he pretty much goes with how i feel about it as he's not the one having to pump himself full of drugs.

Any advice gratefully received


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Nesfastie 

I think most consultants provide similiar advice and are non committal. Try not to worry too much about Lp v SP. It really is a lottery I think if you can focus on eating as healthy as you can and take appropriate vitamins / supplements it's the. Eat you can do to try and improve egg quality after that it's luck ..

I know how you feel being on high dose stims but I guess it needed to get try and get the numbers up . 
I received a call today 4 out of the 5 eggs have fertilised but who knows what quality they will be by Saturday (day 5 transfer) . Last time I did ivf I had 5 fertilise by day 5 I only had 2 blastocysts and the 2 transferred were of poor quality and yeap .... BFN . I hope just one of the eggs is good quality but it really is a luck thing  

I think all you can do is your best, look after yourself and after that it's luck .

Big hug 

Kate x


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

Kate,
4 out of 5 is brilliant and sending lots of splitting babydust to them to keep going! <3


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

twinkletoes42 4 out of 5 is great news, sending lots of babydust to you!

I hope you guys don't mind me jumping on!  I am 41 and currently taking stimms for my 4th cycle (at the lister in London).  Its been a hard road, as I am sure you all know.  I'm doing this on my own too, which makes things extra tough (although I do have very supportive family and friends).

So far its been less of a journey and more of a rollercoaster ride!!   Its definitely been tougher than I thought and it didn't start well as my first scan 2 years ago showed I had a sub-septate uterus.  I was told that I had no chance of carrying a baby to full term and the septum would need to be removed before I could even get started!  Once I was able to starting treatment 6 months later, I didn't respond to the menopur very well, I only had 2 follicles and one was quite small, which meant the cycle was cancelled!

2nd cycle went a little better (changed to gonal f, short protocol) only 3 follicles but I got 2 eggs, which both fertilised but one was abnormal and the other was low quality, it was put back but BFN.

I then started taking every supplement I could get my hands on (seriously I rattle if you shake me!!) I changed all of my toiletries to natural, no fragrances etc.  Everyone thought I had lost the plot but last cycle I did much better 8 follicles and 4 eggs - none of them fertilised!!!!!  

So here I am trying for a 4th and possibly final time, things seem to be going ok, I had my first scan after starting stimms yesterday and there are 8 follicles showing so far, fingers crossed some more may magically appear when I go tomorrow.  Hopefully egg collection will be tues/weds next week and we will be doing ICSI to hopefully make sure the no fertilisation issue doesn't happen again. 

Sorry for the essay, its just really nice to read other peoples experiences and hear about people who are cycling at the moment. Emotionally this has been the toughest process and I guess I just wasn't expecting not to get to the embryo transfer bit at all.  Fingers and toes crossed for this cycle - it only takes one (my mantra at the moment!!)

I really wish everyone the best of luck  xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Peanut 
8 follicles and you have plenty of time with the stims , that's great ... I hope this time is successful for you . 
You have had a lot of setbacks but hopefully this time is your time for success!!!

I'm having my embryo transfer on Saturday morning  

The 1st IVF cycle they rang me twice to say how the blastocysts were doing , this time (different clinic) I just turn up on Saturday morning and they will tell me how many have survived and the quality then  
Well keep in touch and let me know how you are getting on 

Kate xxx


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## happybabe (Jan 8, 2017)

hi TwinkleToes, I hope all goes well for you withEC, R.E.M. It only takes one little sparkling Gem ..🌈I have started my med, they have changed my cycle to a natural cycle.. so they only want to grow one egg!
Talk about all your eggs in one basket.. but I have to put my faith and trust in them.where are you cycling?
Any ARGC ladies in this site at the min? 
Lots of baby dust to you all xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Happybabe
Wish you lots of luck with your treatment , I've heard really good things about ARGC 🍀🍀.
Keep in touch on how things are progressing . I'm having my embryo transfer just hope and pray one sticks 😬. Wishing you lots and lots of baby dust xx


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Hi ladies, good luck and keep positive ! 
For me is game over. My period arrived yesterday, HPT negative. I was meant to test tomorrow  I have tested earlier fi to the AF. Devastated !


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

chamomilae - I'm so sorry to hear that, this process can be so heartbreaking.  I hope you are ok, rest up and take care of yourself, I hope you are able to try again when you are ready.

Happybabe - good luck with your treatment, it only takes one after all so sending you lots of luck and baby dust.

Twinkletoes - wishing you all the best for tomorrow, lots of baby dust coming your way, I hope this is your time too!  I had six decent size follicles today (there is a 7th but it is much smaller).  Back for another scan on Monday so fingers crossed they all continue to grow well over the weekend and the little one catches up!  Let us know how you get on tomorrow xx

best wishes and baby dust to everyone! x


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Chamomilae

It really is tough when and ivf cycle fails , you go through so much and then BFN at end . I know it's hard and the last think you feel like is trying again , but try to think of some positive steps you can take . Go for a follow up appointment with the consultant when you are ready and ask all the questions you have going round in your head . 
I too am really worried due to my age and it's embryo transfer day tomorrow ... this my sound crazy but I've already started looking at my options if this doesn't work 
1) I could do a tandem cycle next time have my own eggs collected and donor eggs also could have one of each put in ( as long as you a ready to take that step) 
2) do another OE cycle 
3 ) just do DE cycle 
I'm already looking at Donor egg at NGC in St Petersburg it sounds really pessimistic but it's a self protection thing for me should this cycle also fail 

I know all of the above might be too much right now but allow yourself time to come to terms with this recent cycle but please don't give up hope . 

Big hug xxxxxx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Hi ladies 👋 

Camomilae I'm very sorry   I hope you can chill out and be pampered this weekend.

Happy babe I only had 2 collected at Serum with my clomid protocol but that's all you need (with luck that you get a good one   ) so good luck to you. 

Peanut sorry to hear your journey's been hard going too. I've rattled most of the last 5 years too  

Nefastie yes I was put on high amounts of menopur & Gonal F in my Uk clinic and it was horrible. I only got 4 eggs the last time when I was embryo banking and didn't even down regulate properly- had to be down regged twice! I don't think I had that many follicles at the start, but on some scans I had 10, so some must have been immature. On Serum's gentle clomid approach I felt better and it was more efficient & better graded blastocysts (altho I've found eggslooking good doesn't mean a successful outcome). Good luck  

SJS thanks all the best to you  

Twinkletoes I understand your logic in considering other options just in case, as I'm in the same situation. 
I really like the idea of the Russian clinics with photos too. My DH is dubious and thinks it might be corrupt/not that person's eggs!   And some of the prices are a bit scary   Some have guaranteed baby after 3 cycles or your money back, but the price is eye watering! Personally I prefer that idea to guaranteed pregnancy or your money back, having had several pregnancies but no take home baby yet  

I still have no AF since my mc in January!   My gynae consultant is on holiday next week so won't even look at my file until the week after, so just got to wait by the looks of things   I've been so busy so far this year I'm not surprised my periods haven't felt like coming back yet   I'm finally having a little rest this afternoon, how nice  

I'm sorry if I've missed anyone. Have a lovely weekend if you can all xx


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## Don’t give up (Nov 12, 2015)

Hi Everyone,

I am just about to start cycle number 4 - you can see my history from my profile. I wish you all lots and lots of luck!!

I prefer the short protocol - the down regulation drugs make me very hormonal - no problems on the short. My last attempt ended with a chemical so I'm feeling pretty negative right now. It helps seeing that other people are also feeling this way.

I'm currently trying to find some success stories for over 42's with own eggs as I'm not sure how many more cycles my emotions (and bank balance) can handle.

Again, good luck!


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Strawberrysundae

I hope you are well , it's tough waiting for consultants advice. You AF will arrive soon just try and relax ( easy to say I know) but trying to keep busy takes your mind off things but don't do too much as stress can effect things too. 

Regarding the Russian clinics Ava Peter and New Generation Clinic in Russia have some excellent reviews. Some of the doctors left AVA Peter and started up the NGC in St Petersburg . I like the idea of photos etc and there is a girl on this forum going to NGC next week for treatment . I'm keeping in touch with her and she's happy to tell me how things go at the clinic. 
Ava Peter does the guaranteed baby thing and the prices look steep and I reckon the OE guarantee there will be qualifying criteria i.e. Age limits and AMH levels I think . 

I like NGC their prices seem far more reasonable €4330 for fresh eggs from donor of your choice 12 eggs and I have emailed them today they do tandem cycles with your own eggs too so you can give your own eggs a final chance which I like the idea of . I am also going to speak with Candie ( the lady on here) to get a patients view of how she was treated etc as I don't think you can beat finding out from people who have been there. 

Nesfastie I hope you are ok and you get the appropriate stim meds to give you a positive result 
SJS75 and Happybabe hope your cycles are going well . ...I've got fingers toes arms legs infact everything crossed for us all!

Good lick ladies 🍀🍀🍀🍀xxx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Bishmyster 

Apologies I left you out of my last post sorry ... 4th cycle of ivf ... well you've been stronger than me , this is my second cycle with OE and I too am thinking crikey not sure I can go through this again , 

If you look at my previous post there are always clinics that do tandem cycles OE and DE if that is something you'd consider ... 

Wishing you lots and lots of baby dust for you this time 
Big hug 
Kate 
Xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Ladies 

I'm at the clinic now waiting for ET. Of the 4 fertilised eggs one has stopped developing . Today the embryologist came to speak to use . I have basically 2 morulas , they've not gone to blastocysts stage yet 😔😔😔so I'm having two morulasput back the 3rd fertilised egg has also slowed by day 5 and embryologist has said unlikely to freeze it ... 

Omg here we go again .... if any knows anything about morulas and any chance of success would be really appreciated 

Feeling a bit low xxxxx


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## Don’t give up (Nov 12, 2015)

Twinkletoes42,

Hey Kate,
Thanks..
How did your transfer go? How many did you transfer in the end? Just seen your post - did you put all 3 back? Don't worry about Blastocysts - it means NOTHING! They all grow at different stages. I have heard of LOADS of success stories with morulas. Mine have always been 3 day transfers. My last transfer I put two back that were both    quality and I got pregnant - yes, it ended in chemical but my first two rounds I put back one great embryo each time and nothing. Also, they can change in minutes/hours - they might have made blast the same day they were put back. No one knows...it's all guess work and each embryologist will grade an embryo in a different way. I 100% think it is luck. 

Believe me, after every failure I think 'I can't do this again' but then my determination kicks in - I'm not ready for DE yet. I'm prepared to do at least 6 rounds with OE before I even consider DE. It's such a personal thing. Thanks for the tandem info - that is an interesting idea that I didn't even know about.

Good luck! If you're on KIK I'd love to hear how you're getting on. It's an app - my username is Chipstead1,...

The TWW wait is AWFUL. I know exactly how you feel. If you're anything like me you are googling everything - all the time. It makes it worse but it's impossible not to do it.  

xx


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Hi Twinkletoes,

Sorry you felt low after your transfer, I had the same feeling after mine.  Its so hard to stay positive during this process but your fertilised eggs did get to day 5 which is still a good thing and I'm sure they must be better in and cosy than out.    I have read success story's from people who had pre-day 5 transfers so it must happen and fingers crossed it will for you.

The 2-week wait is the worst bit, try to keep busy and hold on to as many positive thoughts you can, no matter how small.  Sending you a big hug   and lots of baby dust.

My egg collection is booked for weds, am keeping my fingers and toes crossed for a positive result (but not banking on it after all the hiccups I've had!!) x


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## Don’t give up (Nov 12, 2015)

Hi Peanut/Twinkletoes,

I just want to say another thing...some clinics only do 3 day transfers...leaving embryos to day 5 is purely to determine which one/s are best to transfer if you have 4 or more. You have a great chance with the 2/3 embryos you put back. It's all about the luck - some stick, some don't.

Good luck Wednesday Peanut! My fingers are tightly crossed for you both..

xx


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## nefastie (Jan 13, 2013)

Hello all,

I really struggle with getting notifications for the threads, so apologies for going quiet.

I'm so sorry that it's game over for you chamomilae, sending lots of healing hugs.

@twinkletoes: Thinking of you in your 2WW, how are you doing?

@strawberrysundae: I just can't get over how different the different clinics deal with their patients and I'm not sure it's always patient-led either :/

@Byshmyster: Good luck with your next cycle 

I've had some surprisingly good news on Friday and hope that I won't upset anyone...I no longer need the clinics help, it appears that my body got so scared of all these drugs that might be coming its way that it decided to step up and do it naturally.
Wishing you all the best of luck and hope that I leave you with some future hope that our "old" eggs are not passed it yet.
Sending lots of babydust your way <3


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Nefastie: Thank you for your kind thoughts. And big congratulation, I am so happy for you! You will not upset anyone, you just gave us a big encouragement that is still possible in the 40's with your fantastic news.


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Byshmyster, 

Thank you for your message  and encouragement, I had 2 morulas ( pre blastocysts) put back on Saturday . Embryologist said they were too early to grade .... Trying to stay positive and think PUPO but I'm not had any symptoms at all , no implantation cramps , no spotting , no sore boobs 😞. It really is just a waiting game ...... so 8 days and counting !!! The 2ww is definitely the worst part for me ... I don't know how people cope doing cycle after cycle ... you ladies are really determined and emotionally strong ... I really admire your grit at sticking in there !I'll check ou KIK and keep in touch xxx

Peanut - good luck for tomorrow I wish you lots of luck 🍀🍀🍀🍀 and baby dust . I hope the 2ww passes quickly for you too xxxxx

Nesfastie huge congratulations you must be thrilled !!! It's nice to hear some ladies actually get their dream come true  

Well ladies I   We all get a successful outcome xxx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Chamomilae, 

Big hug from me I hope you're ok. I know it's really early days after this cycle . Are you having a follow up appointment? I was wondering whether follow up appointments with an embryologist is worthwhile or not ? The cycle I'm doing is a self funded NHS cycle , you never get to see your consultant just the nurses . I know when I paid private my consultant was happy to go through things ... with self funded NHS she really has not even given me two minutes of her time . In fact when I emailed her ( because she was my consultant also for 1st cycle ) with one question by the way . she reminded  me I was going down the NHS self funded route and the nurses would answer any questions .... funny the different reaction when you are not paying her £1000's. 

I really do hope you're ok and that the next steps you take work out for you xxx


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Twinkletoes42 thank you for the kind words.I have emailed the clinic and I am now waiting a reply from them as to what to do next. 
My cycle was fully NHS funded and we also have  a FEV on NHS as we had some left over bladts. I do believe that the outcome does not change whether you see a consultant or not. They will do their best for you. Also the majority of the decisions are taken by doctors in their MDT's  and then nurses will inform you the decision. I might be wrong but this is what I believe. It is all to do with the prestige of the clinic as well as they do not want to go down on statistics. I've done mine at Guys and I do trust them. It is just my eggs that are 40 years old... still hopping.


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Hi all, thanks for the good wishes and I hope you are all well.  Congratulations to nefastie too what fabulous news! Like others have said it gives hope to us all! 😊

I had egg collection today, I got 4 eggs from the 8 follicles, apparently some were empty which is disappointing but 4 is the same as last time so I'm happy.  I'm doing icsi this time due to the no fertilisation last time. Dr said before I left that she hadn't spoken to embryologist yet to see how many of the 4 were ok to be injected?! I didn't know that was a thing! I thought they all would be, I'm  really worried now. I haven't heard anything as yet and assuming if none were ok they would have told me today but am stresssing now. Not sure I'll get much sleep! Just hoping and praying Ill have something to transfer this time. X


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Peanut , 

I hope you are well ...... try to rest up ! I'm glad they've got 4 .... got fingers and toes crossed for you xx🍀🍀🍀🍀 wishing you lots of luck


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

thanks Twinkletoes 

Just had the call, only 2 eggs were ok to be injected and from those 2 only one fertilised normally.  Not the best news but obviously better than last time when I had none.  They want to transfer tomorrow morning, I guess because there is only one there is no point in waiting.  I am really disappointed but I have given it my best shot, I think donor eggs will have to be the way forward for me, as hard as that is to accept.  However, it does only take one, so fingers crossed this little guy is it!!  

how is your 2ww waiting going?  I hope you are not too stressed x


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi peanut 
Hang on in there , it only takes 1 !!! I know exactly how tough this is . I've had no symptoms at all and I'm 6dp5dt tomorrow . Feel like my AF is due to arrive . This is exactly what happened last cycle I didn't  get to my test date as AF arrived. 

I think after this attempt I'm also looking at DE if this doesn't work. It  really is tough but I   We both get some good news !! 🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀big hug! Xxx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Good luck all of you   xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Strawberry sundae and peanut 

Well this is 6dp5dt... and no symptoms , couldn't stop crying this morning ... just feel like my AF is going to show up at anytime .... . I'm on the 2 ww thread on here and girls are all testing early .... I'm too scared to test ... holding onto a very small thread of hope ...... but in my heart of hearts I really don't think this has worked .... I can stop crying either 
Just hate all this waiting  
Xxx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Ah it's really tough sometimes, the 2ww   Just try to take 1 day at a time & see if there's anything else that you can do to take your mind off it. Or plan next steps for either outcome so you're still in control a little? Not long til otd   xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Thanks Strawbeery Sundae

Have you had a response from your consultant yet ? I hope you get a follow up soon .... ironically you want your AF and I don't want mine !! 😳

I hope you are keeping well
X


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Hi Twinkletoes I think my consultant is back next week, hope to hear from him soon. My AF may be arriving as I've been spotting for the past couple of days, yay!   Yes it's funny, just what you don't want to see   It means I have to wait til the next one now as it clashes with my clinic's Easter shut down - yet more waiting & another month going by!   Hope things are going okay for you x


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## chamomilae (Oct 11, 2016)

Good morning ladies, 
Peanut- hoppefully your transfer went well yesterday.
Twinkletoe hopefully a BFP soon from you.

I have my follow up appointment on the 25.4.17 and I am hoping I can start a FET after my next period. We have 4 frozen blastocits 1 at day 5 and 3 at day 6 . They are of lower quality than the 2 fresh blasts transferred last month but I guess they still have some chance if they have saved them.
All the best ladies and I might not be that fast to reply but I always read your messages .  A good weekend everyone.


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi ladies 
Well I have a bit of pink discharge , I'm convinced it's my period about to start . Have AF type feeling ... absolutely no symptoms . Really do think this cycle has  failed , I'm 7dp5dt... think this is a bit late to be implantation stuff. I hope you are all well . 

Peanut , how you feeling , how's things going? 
Strawberry Sundae ... please you seem you be getting back into your cycles  . Must be frustrating with the delays but things moving in the  right direction 

Chamomilae, really pleased you're planning next steps 🙏 Hope you have more luck next time round . Unfortunately I have no frozen ones to rely on  

Well take care ladies I'll keep you updated 
Xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi ladies 

Woke up with period type pains last night , but no sign of period yet ... still no symptoms ... just want 11th here so I can test .. still think AF will show up before test  

Trying to stay positive but it's really difficult xxx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Ladies 

Well I'm bailing out of here , test date was 11th April it my AF has turned up making the result pretty obvious  .
I wish you all the very best of luck wish your cycles and hope your dreams come true 
Xx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

I'm very sorry to read that Twinkletoes   Sending you a massive   I hope you can look after yourself & rest for a bit. Sorry I can't say anything that will help much, but I hope you find some light & inspiration soon. Wishing you all the best and a happy future that will make it all worth while xx


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Sorry I dropped off the grid over the weekend as was away for a couple of days and my receptions was terrible so couldn't get on to the internet..

Twinkletoes - I'm so sorry to hear that, as strawberrysundae said there are no words I can say that will make it better but you are in my thoughts, I hope you are doing ok and looking after yourself.  Take some time for yourself, rest up and try to do things that make you smile (even if you don't feel like it).  Spend some time with friends and family (when you are ready) and have lots of  .  Please don't give up hope that you will succeed in your dreams, hopefully we will all get there eventually, whatever route we have to take.  Sending you a big   xx


Chamomilae - Good luck for the FET!  Lots of people have success with lower grades so fingers crossed you will too! x

My transfer went as well as can be expected on Friday.  They said it was looking exactly how it should on day 2 so fingers crossed that's a good sign but obviously its such early days, who knows what is happening.  I'm just hoping that its still there and growing as it should!  I think it should get to blastocyst stage today/tomorrow.  So will have to see if I get any symptoms later this week.  It is driving me nuts not knowing what is going on in there!  Luckily I was at a spa with my girlfriends this weekend (no treatments or spa stuff for me though!!  )  and it was such good fun, we laughed a lot and it really took my mind off things for a couple of days.  However, now I'm back my mind is in overdrive again!  10 days still to go, its going to drive me nuts!!    xx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Good luck Peanut and Camomilae x 
I'm hoping my egg collection will be possible soon now I've actually had a period


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Thank you StrawberrySundae     I hope everything goes well for you after Easter xx


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Ladies,

Sorry it's been a while - hectic couple of weeks, so tired, and been working nights last week which is never great whilst stimming.
Just been looking back to catch up

Twinkletoes - so sorry, so disappointing, and there's nothing we can say that will make it any easier for you - thinking of you and know that you are not alone, I can totally relate to how you're feeling.  Hope you'll be back when you're ready and if it feels right to have another try.

chamomilae - so sorry to hear your news too.  Hope your follow up will be useful and fingers crossed for you for success with your FET.  

Peanut - congrats and hope all is going well. Hope you can distract yourself in the neverending 2ww.  Really hoping it will be wonderful news!

Nefastie - contrats - what wonderful news!  So pleased for you.

Strawberry  - hope you can get started after easter

Bishmyster - hi and best wishes for your next cycle.

AFM, I'm now day 6 Stimms (menopur 225).  So far all ok, just very tired and grumpy!  Had an early scan today at my request after the disaster at EC last time. Still early days, and not bad news, but I did feel slightly concerned - left ovary couldn't be fully visualised and so couldn't count, right had at least 3 good follies with a few smaller ones.  They have increased my dose to 300 from today, so I think obviously going slower this time (which was the idea anyway). I hope it will be ok.  The last 2 cycles I responded very quickly to the drugs, I wonder if my age is catching up with me now.  I guess it has been 2 years since my first cycle with gonal F where I had 22 follicles which grew very quickly?

Anyway, best wishes to you all.  Hope you have some nice plans for the weekend ahead.

BW,
S.


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Thanks SJS75, I'm trying to not think about it but its driving me crazy!    Plus I'm now starting to feel like AF is going to turn up so my positivity has taken a nose dive    I've been toying with the idea of testing early but think I am too scared to do it!!

Good luck with your cycle, sending you best wishes and baby dust x


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Peanut

Sorry you're feeling despondent.  If it's any consolation, I did have AF-type cramping in my first cycle in the days after transfer, at one point really sharp pains and I panicked, but got BFP that time, and then in the last cycle felt nothing at all, and had BFN, so I guess maybe some action in the uterus is a good thing?
Fingers crossed for you - hang in there!

Are you off work at the moment?  It's so hard to keep busy and keep focussed and positive.  Could you bake or watch movies or read a nice book or something to keep your mind off it all?

Thinking of you,
S.


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

ahh thanks SJS75, hopefully you're right.  As I had an early transfer I think implantation will (hopefully  ) be happening from today so I am waiting for any type of sign!!  I'm at work unfortunately, although I think I would have lost the plot if I had been at home, at least here it does distract me to some degree.

Test day is Wednesday but AF is due Monday and I've been pretty regular during this whole process so I guess I'll see what comes first!

Thanks for your thoughts, I hope your cycle is going well.  When is your next scan? x


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Peanut,

Glad you're working - I'm also planning to stay at work throughout this time (apart from EC day and the next day), I don't think it makes any difference to outcome whether you work or not, but keeps you sane!

My next scan is early Friday morning - that will be day 9. I just hope they will also be able to do bloods as it's a bank holiday and they usually don't do bloods over the weekends.  Last time I had scans day 6, 9, 10 and then theatre on the Tuesday, so I imagine it will be similar unless there's a risk of early ovulation again and perhaps theatre Monday then... I hate not being able to plan anything, I'm not good at waiting for things to happen!  Anyway my family are all understanding, and so I'll probably have a quiet Easter this year.  I have swapped my on call shifts for Monday and Tuesday so at least I have flexibility with work next week.

Well lets hope your AF does not make an appearance on Monday - it's going to be a weekend of living on the edge for us both!

S.


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Hi SJS, yes I think I would have been more stressed at home with nothing to do.  However, I am looking forward to a quiet Easter too, as the last few weeks have been quite busy.

Good luck for tomorrow, let me know how you get on.  I had terrible cramps this morning, they woke me up, no spotting or anything yet so am   AF isn't on the way.  Just have to see how it goes, if nothing else this process has taught me that you can't control these things, you just have to hope for the best and be lucky I guess.

Fingers crossed for us both xx


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## fuzzywilmer (Apr 7, 2017)

hi i am new to all this and first I would like to thank all the ladies on here that have encouraged people like me that have been reading all your posts to come and say hello.
this is all very scary and I need lots of help and advice. I also feel one of the oldest here.
sometimes i feel silly with some of the things I have done to try and get pregnant until I read your posts and have realised you are all doing the same. I take so many pills I rattle. cut out smoking, cut down on drinking, joined the gym, eat better food. I only have one coffee a day. the first one of the morning and use fruit sugar to help cut down refined sugar. I am hoping this helps. 
I have had my Amh test and it came back above average for my age but still low for my age. I now need to decide a way forward with my OE one or three cycle. I'm not at the De stage as I feel I would love to use my own.
any help and advice most welcome.


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Hi Fuzzywilmer, welcome, are you thinking of embryo banking? I'm still using my own eggs but only having 1 more cycle now and then would have to move onto DE if it didn't work. I've taken loads of supplements & done all kinds of things to be healthy too   Good luck and I hope you find lots of helpful info on this site x

All the best SJS, peanut and everyone else x


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## fuzzywilmer (Apr 7, 2017)

O banking. Do you mean freezing. Is that the same thing. I've been told if I do the three cycle's they freeze them all. They said they believe frozen eggs work better then fresh. It's just going to cost me more and take longer but may work better. 
This is all new to me and a bit of a mind field. I need lots of advice. Thanks for the welcome strawberry sundie.


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Morning Ladies,

Hope you all had as good an Easter weekend as could be...!

Welcome fuzzywilmer.  Don't stress, it is a lot to take in and get used to initially, but it soon becomes familiar and you have loads of support on here!

Peanut - how are you doing?  Hope AF has not made an appearance, and fingers crossed for you for tomorrow.

Strawberrysundae - how are you getting on?  

AFM, I had scans on Friday and yesterday - all going well, triggered last night and due for EC tomorrow morning.  Living on the edge a bit that I don't ovulate before tomorrow - but nothing more I can do now apart from think positive and keep everything crossed for tomorrow.  We have a reasonable number of follies on yesterday's scan, 10 on right and about 5 good ones on left I think.  Only 2 are >2cm but several at 1.8 ish yesterday, so hopefully those will all continue to grow by tomorrow.  Oestrogen 3600 yesterday.  Not sure if that's about right?
Feeling uncomfortable and bloated today, bit of nausea...

For those back at work today, hope you have a good day - always tough after a long weekend!

S.


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

Hi all, sorry for the radio silence, for some reason I can't log on properly from my phone so I can't reply from home at the weekend.  I've tried to stay as busy as possible to distract myself but I must say some days it works better than others!!  AF was due yesterday and I woke up to dark discharge (sorry tmi!!)  I was devastated...  I have had period type cramps every morning since et and I'm pretty regular so it seems AF is trying to break through, although I guess the cyclogest pessaries are probably holding it at bay at the moment.  On the plus side it was only light and didn't continue all day so there's still hope but I'm already dreading a negative result tomorrow.  I was very emotional and sad yesterday, this was my last go with my own eggs and its very hard to accept that I won't have a biological child of my own.  Anyway nothing I can do now so will just have to see what happens in the morning, am keeping my fingers crossed!  

Welcome fuzzywilmer!  It is so confusing when you start out, this forum was a god send for me, I had no idea about anything!! Unfortunately I don't know anything about embryo banking but I have read that success rates of frozen and fresh embryos are pretty similar so I don't think you would have any issues there.

Thanks Strawberrysundae, good luck for your next cycle x

Thanks SJS, at least its a short week us all!  Good luck for tomorrow, let us know how you get on x


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

just a quick update, test this morning was a BFN, devastated.  Finding it hard to talk to anyone and I'm at work so I can't breakdown.  Feel numb, I was really hoping this was it but obviously wasn't meant to be.  It looks like donor eggs is the only way forward for me which is heartbreaking at the moment but I'll take some time to think everything over and decide what happens next.

Good luck and best wishes to everyone xx


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Oh Peanut, I am so so sorry to hear that.  I really feel for you today - that is just so devastating. It must be so tough at work today.  You're very strong to be carrying on today.  
You've done as much as you could have, and it sometimes just seems so unfair.  Take time to work through your feelings and consider all your options before you come to any conclusions.  Often you feel differently over time.  There's no rush now, take time for you. 
Feel free to PM me if you would like to chat further.  

Sending lots of hugs and support.xxx


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Peanut I'm so sorry   It's so unfair. I've only got 1 OE go left too. If you think DE is your only option I am sure you won't mind in the future once you have your lovely bundle, but I totally understand how you must be feeling xxx

SJS good luck today! That's a big number of follicles, I had about half that last year in my last Long protocol. Hope it goes well xx

Fuzzywilmer sorry for the delay getting back to you, yes I meant freezing, saving them up to use later. Good luck with your 3 cycles xx

AFM I just hope my next AF arrives on time so I can have my EC around mid May.


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Peanut ,
I'm so sorry , big hug from me ... it's so hard to carry on but do not give up ... 
if you do decide to go to DE and when you are ready , I have just started on this route and I know the pain of thinking you won't have your own genetic child but please please don't let that put you off . There are lots of options with DE 
Xxx


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

thanks SJS, Strawberrysundae and twinkletoes for the kind words.  It really is unfair and going it alone it makes it all the much harder.  It makes you feel isolated and I second guess all of the decisions I've made.  Don't get me wrong family and friends have been very supportive but all of my friends have children and they don't really understand what I'm going through and how hard it is at times to be around them all.  ff has been great though as you see you are not alone and there are many other people going through similar journeys, so I am thankful that I found you all!!  

I would love to do another cycle with OE but after 4 failed cycles that have only resulted in 2 ET and both times only 1 2dt, I think I have to be realistic.  I'd have a much better chance with DE, I'm going to speak to my consultant as soon as possible but I'm assuming that she will say the same.  However, I don't think I can afford DE at the Lister, 4 OE rounds have broken the bank!  So I will probably go abroad.

The next decision is where and I have no idea how to start that decision making process!!  So any tips you can give me Twinkletoes would be greatly appreciated!!

I hope everything went well yday SJS x

Thanks and hugs to everyone


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## SJS75 (Oct 1, 2016)

Hi Ladies,

Peanut - glad you're looking at options and still feeling relatively positive.  It seems like so much of this is luck and no matter what we do, it is out of our control.  Hope you'll find a good solution whatever you decide and it will work out well.

Thanks for all good luck wishes.  I got on reasonably well yesterday with EC.  I tolerated the procedure better than last time with no drama in recovery.  Lots of pain, but thankfully that has settled today.  I got 8 eggs and have had a call this morning from the embryologist - 6 were mature, 4 have fertilised normally, so they are planning to take them to day 5 and let me know on Sunday if all is on track for a Monday transfer.
I can't help feel slightly disappointed in that I had at least 14 good follicles on my scan - and even just before theatre yesterday, they commented that I had a good number, so not sure whether I lost a few again or what... Anyway, very grateful to have got this far at my age, so will just be positive that one or two of these will provide a successful outcome.

The next dilemma, assuming I get to day5, is whether to transfer 2 or not - on both previous fresh cycles I have transferred 2 supposedly good embryos, and the first time 1 implanted, but the second time neither implanted.  It seems there is new evidence coming out that it may be best to transfer 1 as if one is poorer quality, it can jeopardise the other.  Who knows?  I have 1 frozen from last cycle, so if I have 4 on Monday, I could either transfer 2 and freeze 2, assuming they are suitable for freezing, or transfer 1 and freeze 3 which would hopefully leave me 2 x 2 for frozen transfer if necessary.  This is my last fresh cycle as we really cannot afford any more and feel it would be pointless if this is not successful as we have had 3 good attempts.  

Anyway, hope you're all ok.  Keep positive!

S. x


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

oh that's great news SJS.  I know its disappointing when you get less than expected but 4 is still good.  Fingers crossed this time is it for you, sending lots of baby dust your way!

I'm not sure what I would do in your position with regards to the transfer, I never had more then one to use.  I think I probably would have done 2 if I'd had the choice but I haven't seen this new research, so it would have purely been that hopefully at least one of the two would stick!

thanks, I am ok, very sad and still processing so not really talking much but that will get easier with time.  I have started having a little look at DE overseas.  I'm quite a stubborn person so I sort of feel like I have to keep at and not let it get the better of me but I really agree, I think it is more luck than anything else in this journey.

Good luck for sunday xx


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Peanut 

I depends how you feel about DE , do you want to choose characteristics similiar to yourself or are you happy to have DE with limited information . Check out New Generation Clinic St Peterburg . They have lots of donors and you can see childhood photos of he donors too . Price also reasonable lots of options . They even offer tandem cycle so you can have a last go with your OE and DE at the same time so you have lots of choice . Worth taking a look 
Big hug  

SJS four is still good ... got fingers and toes crossed for you xxx


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

thanks twinkletoes.  I am definitely open to donor eggs, although I'm not 100% how I feel about pictures for the donor.  With the DS I felt strongly that I wanted to know what he looked like but now I'm not so sure it matters.  I have had a brief look at new gen following your recommendation, the only thing that worries me with Russia (and I'm probably making sweeping generalisations here) but whether or not the donors are exploited in anyway?  Hopefully not and I guess it could happen anywhere and it would be difficult to know anyway?  I will definitely look into it further though.  I'm thinking I need to check out maybe 5/6 clinics and see how I feel about each of them.  Its so much to decide on!

Have you made your final decision on New Gen?  Are booked for a consultation or anything, would be really interested to hear about your experience with them or any other clinic.  thanks again for the support


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Peanut 

Yes we have booked for treatment with New Generation clinic . There is another lady on the Eastern European thread called Candie who has been to the clinic and rates them really highly .

As for donor pics , they are pictures of what the donor looked like as a child and I guess I gave me a bit of reassurance that I had some choice in this which made it easier to move from OE to DE. 

As for exploitation ... I guess you never know the circumstances of ladies willing to donate their eggs however what I know about my donor is that she has two children herself and stated she wanted to give that chance to another person . The clinic so far has been professional and supportive so I guess that's why I chose them . They also offered the tandem cycle with OE and DE if you are wanting a final OE attempt . They seem really relaxed and gave me a clear treatment plan and ensure you have loads of tests beforehand which can be undertaken at their clinic €165. 

Well that's all I know so far I hope it helps some way 

X


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

thanks so much for the information twinkletoes 

Its really weird but I'm now struggling a little with the switch over to DE.  I thought I was ok with the idea and I probably am (I'm quite a practical person and I realise that this is probably the best course for success) but I have just been so incredibly sad the last few days its thrown me completely.  I guess I just need a bit of time to get my head around everything.  

Would it be ok to pm you at some point regarding your experiences with contacting overseas clinics and at new gen?

Wishing you the best of luck xx


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## Rebecca_747 (Jan 19, 2016)

I hope you don't mind me joining in...

I'm 43 and just had my second ivf last week.  After splitting with my ex, he wasn't great when I had a miscarriage with his child, I decided to do this on my own..  I think there should be a single AND over 40's group.... Ha ha!!

Anyway, it would be nice to chat


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## betty21 (Jul 17, 2013)

Hi everyone - im currently on meds, We are off to spain next week for a third round of DE with the same donor that helped us to get our 2 beautiful girls - the only difference this time is we are using frozen eggs rather than fresh which does scare me a little - transfer should be 8th may,
keeping everything crossed for you Rebecca x


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## Rebecca_747 (Jan 19, 2016)

Thanks Betty..  What clinic are you using? x


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## Twinkletoes42 (Aug 29, 2016)

Hi Peanut 

Of course you can PM me . I researched different clinics for DE but the overriding factor for me to get my head around things was the need to have some choice .. happy to discuss further . It's a really tough journey  but my friend well actually she was a colleague from a few  years back  who has had DE baby approx 6 years ago  has really helped me . I contacted her to ask some questions that were really playing on my mind and I have to say she's put my mind at rest with some of her advice and how happy she is now xxxx


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## Sampot (Apr 27, 2017)

Hello I am 41 - turning 42 next month and recently single. I have decided it's now or never and to try to conceive on my own. I had an MOT last week that revealed my AMH is 5.6 and my follicle count is apparently a bit better than you would expect for my AMH level. I am now trying to decide which own egg and donor sperm treatment to try. Does anyone know the following:

1. Is natural or mild IMF more likely to be successful for someone of my age. London Womens Clinic say I need maximum strength fertility drugs but research on the create sight and some forums suggest natural might be better; and 

2. Which London clinic is better for an older woman with low ovarian reserve like me? Lister, create, ARGC and CRGH (hopefully I have the acronyms right) seem to have the highest success rates for women my age but not sure how others found them.

I am reading all the forums and news articles I can to make a choice but if anyone can advise me from a similar experience then I would really appreciate it.

I used to be very fertile when I was younger as had two unplanned pregnancies in my twenties so I don't think there is anything wrong with my fertility other than my age and low egg reserve/quality.

Thanks and good luck to everyone else trying to conceive x Sam


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## peanut76 (Jul 5, 2016)

thanks Twinkletoes  I will probably do that when I can get it all straight in my head and I know what I want to ask without driving you mad!  Great idea re the ex colleague, it reminded me I have a friend, who has a friend who used DE.  I have contacted my friend to see if her friend would be up for having a chat.  As you said it might help with some of my worries.

Hi Rebecca and Betty I hope everything is going well for you guys  

Hi Sampot, I can only say that I was treated very well at the lister and although they are very busy I don't have any complaints with regards to treatment.  Unfortunately, I won't be able to continue my journey there as being realistic I need to move to DE, if I want to succeed and I just can't afford that at the Lister (especially not after 4 failed cycles ).  I have no experience of the natural cycles but I think they go for quality over quantity and I know that has worked for some people.  Its so difficult to decide on these things, especially when you are doing it alone and don't have anyone to share the responsibility but this forum is a great source of advice.  Maybe try posting a separate topic or in the single area and you might get more advice come through.

best of luck to everyone xx


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## welshnat (Feb 7, 2017)

Hi all hope you don't mind me joining. I'm 41,  42 in July.  My husband is 40. Neither of us have children and we are classed as unexplained although husband semen are medioka and I have a slightly flattened uterus but they said that shouldn't be making a difference. We've been trying for nine years with nothing. Started our journey over three years ago however got lost on the NHS system for three years. Started our first round of ivf a few back on short protocol with max drugs. I had five eggs retrieved two days ago. Only one fertilised yesterday and I was told I would receive a call today with regards how the one survived overnight. You can imagine the wait was a nightmare.  They rung this morning to tell me it was top quality for day two. You can imagine I could sing from the roof tops.  I had it put back I'm at ten this morning. I'm not officially PUPO and in the two weeks wait. Just wondering if anyone else had 2 day transfer. X


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## Rebecca_747 (Jan 19, 2016)

Hi Peanut

I got my bfp this afternoon...  I'm still trying to take it all in.  x


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## StrawberrySundae (Jan 30, 2017)

Hello not been on here for a while, hope everyone's doing ok.

Rebecca congrats!! That is great news! Lovely to hear it.

Welshnat wishing you all the best too now you're pupo! Good luck 🍀

SJS and Betty good luck with your transfers, was it this week?

Peanut and Twinkletoes hope you're ok  

Twinkletoes I feel the same about the control element or at least some kind of choice over the DE process. 

Sampot good luck too. I had max strength meds last year and got 5 & 4 eggs (all fertilised but only a chemical pg from them), then v gentle clomid in Greece in Nov where only 2 eggs collected (top quality but still a twin mc later) - I'd say the gentle/natural approach was much nicer & easier on the body. You produce fewer eggs but if you get a healthy one then that's all that counts (I'm still waiting!)

AFM hope to do my last ivf EC next month. Feeling a bit crappy about things today as tired, hope my luck changes soon.

Have a nice bank hol weekend all xx


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