# Newbie feeling a bit low



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

Hi, i am a newbie and, i suppose, like others am quite upset at the thought of coming onto this site, because it means admitting there is a problem right? I have pondered for several hours, whether to post a bit about myself or continue to deny we have a problem and just feel rotten by myself while DH is at work.

I am 41, DH is 45, we met when i was 32 and 1 month after meeting i was diagnosed with Interstitial Cystitis (this is where the inner lining of the bladder is coroded and full of holes, there is no cure and it is extremely painful during a flare up)...anyway i was told by my consultant, not to get pregnant until they got it undercontrol. When they finally got it under some sort of control i found i was 39!!! and we were struggling to conceive, 2 years later i was eventually referred to LGI (now seacroft) where i was first seen by a very grumpy, patronising and (i thought) rude consultant. Of course, i broke down in tears...Long story short, we have just finished our 2nd failed IVF cycle at Seacroft, and i feel very much that we were rushed through and spat back out the other end very quickly  

We go for our final chat with Mrs Sharma tomorrow, where she will tell us that they wont help us anymore and that i am only allowed 2 goes.

In both cycles, i had 8 lovely big follicles (over 22mm), each containing an egg, but they were taken out too soon and were all immature.

Egg collection at Seacroft last Saturday was eventful!!!   The staff were certainly shouting alot!!!

So just wanted to say hi and say i am from York.


----------



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

to FF!

We had treatment at Jimmys before it merged to create Seacroft, have been to the new clinic though recently. I'm sorry that your last 2 cycles have failed  I know how devastating it is  Do you think given time, depending on finances, you may have another attempt? I hope you can find the strength to  I'll leave you some links shortly which should help you at the moment xx
Please have a good look around the site and feel free to post in any area, and make yourself at home. There are many who are on their TTC journey, and others who have been fortunate to have little ones with assistance. You will soon discover that our members are very encouraging of one another and offering advice or just simple hugs. There's a vast amount of information here for everyone, so start reading, posting and getting to know others. You will make some great friends too, lots of members often have meet ups locally too, for chats, coffee, shopping or even nights out! You can share conversations with one another freely, simply because we all understand each other. It's hard when family and friends don't fully comprehend what this journey entails and the emotions that go with it. That's where we come in!

Here are some links which you should find really useful at the moment&#8230;&#8230;

*What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~ *   CLICK HERE

*Complimentary, Holistic and Spiritual Approaches ~ *CLICK HERE 

*TTC over 40 ~ *CLICK HERE

* Negative Cycle Follow up Questions ~ *CLICK HERE
There may be some useful questions for you to put to Mrs Sharma tomorrow

*IVF General ~ *CLICK HERE

I see uou have found the Yorkshire board too, you'll get lots of support there, the Yorkshire lasses are lovely 

If you need any help with the site or have any questions please shout xx

You can also chat live in our chat room. We have a newbie day in the chat room every Wednesday where you can meet one of our mods for support, meet other new members and get technical support with navigating the site and using all the functions available here.  CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT 

Keep in touch
Ceri xx

PS I have also sent you a pm (private message)


----------



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

Thank you very much for your warm welcome Ceri and alo your PM. We will try again, although we have been told we aren't allowed to try again at seacroft, we were thinking of trying Care at sheffield. It is so hard financially isn't it?


----------



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Why did they say you cant try again there? Although I dont blame you for trying somewhere else


----------



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

Because they want me to go for egg donation abroad, prof Balen/Rutherford was pushing us for ED even before we started our first cycle. Both times i have got 8 large follicles, each with an egg, but removed too early, whilst my response has not been spectacular, i was quite proud of my little crop 

We go for final meeting with mrs Sharma tomorrow but i am sure she will go along with what prof balen said and not allow us another go. I feel, and i can't help feeling like this, that they just wanted rid of us...we have no problems health wise or fertility wise, it is just unexplained (apart from my age) DH sometimes gives a low motility sample, but not always and we are fee paying. Does anyone know if any of the Seacroft staff also work at Care Sheffield? It says on their website that they specialise in people with 2 or more failed attempts?


----------



## BBW (Aug 15, 2010)

Hi
We're quite local to you and only managed 4 follicles on each of our 2 failed cycles. 1st 'crop' of 2 eggs were immature I think, embryo's only went to 4 cells. But second lot of 3 eggs produced 2 good embryo's of 7 & 8 cell.
Unfortunately both have ended in bio-chemical pregnancy's (test said yes, but body said no).
We are at Hull IVF unit and have been very pleased. We will now have to pay and rates seem competitive to others.
Our follow-up appt is soon, fingers crossed they will not push us down the egg donation road.
Good luck, I can recommend Hull, they are warm and thorough at the same time. We both feel we are in good hands.


----------



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Hun, there are plenty of other clinics who will let you try with your own eggs first, If you had 8 follies each with an egg inside, then dont let them push you into using a donor 
(I am in the middle of draughting up a long complaint letter to them at Seacroft over the way we were treated recently) 
Have a look at other clinics. You can see which clinics do what and where here ... 
http://www.hfea.gov.uk/fertility.html

xx

/links


----------



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

BBW said:


> Hi
> We're quite local to you and only managed 4 follicles on each of our 2 failed cycles. 1st 'crop' of 2 eggs were immature I think, embryo's only went to 4 cells. But second lot of 3 eggs produced 2 good embryo's of 7 & 8 cell.
> Unfortunately both have ended in bio-chemical pregnancy's (test said yes, but body said no).
> We are at Hull IVF unit and have been very pleased. We will now have to pay and rates seem competitive to others.
> ...


BBW thank you so much for your reply, we have both read your post and i think we might just give Hull a go when we get told never to darken Seacroft doorstep again tomorrow. Are you nearer Hull? why weren't you sent to Leeds?


----------



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

Ceri. said:


> Hun, there are plenty of other clinics who will let you try with your own eggs first, If you had 8 follies each with an egg inside, then dont let them push you into using a donor
> (I am in the middle of draughting up a long complaint letter to them at Seacroft over the way we were treated recently)
> Have a look at other clinics. You can see which clinics do what and where here ...
> http://www.hfea.gov.uk/fertility.html
> ...


Thanks once again Ceri, we are very confused because when we went for the post mortem of the first cycle with Balen i asked him why couldn't the follicles have been left in a bit longer so that they matured as they were still growing, he said 'That is a good question' but gave no answers, only that it could've made a difference, so, with that in mind i assumed (wrongly) that they would bear that in mind this time with the flare cycle, but no, exactly same...i am not going to leave tomorrow until i get a proper answer. 
If anyone sees a pathetic looking bleached blonde thing carrying all her sharps bins back at 9am at Seacroft tomorrow, come give me a hug. 

Ceri, please feel free to pm me about your complaint, we could compare notes as i feel i shall also be writing a VERY long letter of complaint.


----------



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

You're right to say that you wont leave until you get an answer  It's the least you deserve. I'll definately pm you hun, might be tomorrow now though. Let me know how you get on tomorrow wont you? Lots of luck that you get some answers  
By the way, not sure if you've seen it but there's a Hull clinic chatter thread here ... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=247375.0 You could always pop by to say hello to the ladies and ask any questions  xx


----------



## Helenahandcart (Nov 22, 2010)

Ceri. said:


> You're right to say that you wont leave until you get an answer  It's the least you deserve.


  I shall be the one with the sharps bins, being escorted by security  and a parking ticket


----------



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

I'm just wondering if I have a twin sister!    That sounds so me!


----------

