# My adoption story



## Bobi Kadee (Aug 18, 2014)

I've been lurking on here for a couple of months because I was going through matching panel and introductions and needed to know that others had been there too. Now myself and LO are settled and getting better every day so I thought what better time to introduce myself. 

I am single and have no fertility problems (that I know of) but wanted to be a mum.  I hit my thirties and spent lots of time thinking about what to do, to be honest I knew that I wanted to adopt, I didn't feel that finding a donor etc was for me however I was overwhelmed by the idea of the application process.  

At Christmas 2011 I was at a party and someone I don't know very well approached me and told me all about her being adopted, it was random but seemed to be fate, especially when the next morning there was an article on the news about how it was going to be made easier to adopt(!)  I spent a few months doing research and getting into a position where I felt I could contact the local authority and find out where I stood.

I did and that started the process. The information evening, initial visit, group sessions.  There were two delays due to lost paperwork   but then I got assigned the best social worker in the world.  She did my assessment which was a strange experience, I learnt things about myself that I didn't realise.  It was tough, especially when I had to discuss my mums death in detail and how it affected my life, on what happened to be the anniversary of her death.

Then we went to approval panel.  Again my amazing social worker was such a support.  I thought it was the most nervous I could be.  I worried that being single and having a family history of breast cancer would be a problem, I was armed with facts and statistics and stuff and they didn't even ask.  It went really well.  Then I prepared myself for a very long wait.  

I got a phone call five weeks later saying I'd been linked with a little pink, and that she was so fabulous I would say yes straight away.  I was driving home from work and nearly drove into the wall, I couldn't believe it had happened so quickly.  I got all the details (after pulling over) but forgot to ask about a name.  . I don't believe I have ever smiled so much.  I knew it was right there and then, it's a weird thing but I knew and I hadn't even seen a picture of her.  

Because it was summer, matching panel was delayed but I got to meet her foster carers and social worker, her foster carers were fab, so supportive and helpful, they still are.  

I was so much more nervous for matching panel, petrified.  My dad came with me and they even asked him into the panel room with me.  I promised myself I wouldn't cry when I was in there.  I failed.  They asked me if I had seen a picture of her, obviously I had by then but when I told them how I felt before I had seen the picture I made everyone else on the panel cry too.  They were so lovely, everyone was really emotional.  They approved the match.  I was so excited.  I could decorate and buy things now without worrying, and ooh did I buy things.  

I received a video clip of LO being showed a picture of me and saying mama.  There were lots of tears then, it felt so real, up until the idea was there but I wouldn't let myself really believe. 

Introductions were great, again the foster carers were brilliant and so was she.  My little girl (I still love saying that) was wonderful. She did however get a cold the day before I met her, and then I got it during introductions and so did the foster parent.  When you get told that you will get ill and be exhausted, believe it.  I was shattered.  So was she.

She so is worth it.  

I took her home at the end of eight days and since then we have had 6 weeks of fun, first steps, more and more words, peppa pig, soft play, exhaustion, doctor visits, multi tasking and laughter.  Amongst other things.  And life has never been better.


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## millie:) (Feb 12, 2013)

What an amazing story,so happy for you were five months in and every day is amazing your story is truly amazing x


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## Bobi Kadee (Aug 18, 2014)

Thanks so much Millie, I've got a great support network and being able to read about the journeys of other people on here has been a real help.  I've been so blessed because she is such a sociable little one.  Really happy and settled very fast.  We've both learned a lot from each other.
Wow, five months. I hope you and your family are as happy as we are.  Xx


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## K jade (Aug 11, 2013)

Thanks for sharing.  
considering options at the moment, its great to read stories like yours. 
xxxxx


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## Bobi Kadee (Aug 18, 2014)

Thanks Kayla-Jade.  I wish you luck in your decision making.  

Adoption may not be easy but you learn a lot about yourself along the way.  It's a long journey but when I look at my LO it's well worth the wait.  Each delay meant that the timing was right for it to be her.
Good luck.  Xx


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## ellej74 (Dec 22, 2011)

what a beautiful story - I bet your little one is just gorgeous. we are just starting our home study next week so its wonderful to read other experiences. xx Elle


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## Lorella (Jan 10, 2013)

It was lovely to read your story. Your little one sounds like a lucky girl to have you and you to have her. We are 6 weeks into placement with little pink too who is perfect and gorgeous in every way   xxx


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## Bobi Kadee (Aug 18, 2014)

Thanks Lorella and Elle.  I'm definitely blessed.  i remember using ff to help when I was panicking about things like writing my pen picture.  Other people have ideas and have been through it before.
Lorella, congratulations on your little pink.  
Elle, good luck with the journey, when you get to the day that you bring your LO home you'll think back to the long process and forget about any worries from the process and just realise how unbelievably lucky you and your LO are.  Then you start with the next set of worries.  Are they getting enough sleep? Are they settling in well? Etc.  But that's great because you are being a mummy finally.  Xx


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## JoJo7 (Aug 24, 2013)

Congratulations Bobi Kadee 😄 I hope your little girl is doing well. You are very lucky to have each other xxx


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## kendra-cha (Apr 29, 2015)

This story almost made me cry, I feel so happy for you! 
How have things been recently?


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## Bobi Kadee (Aug 18, 2014)

Thanks for reading Kendra.  It's still fabulous eight months in, we're now dealing with other delays, court delays this time, but keeping everything crossed for the adoption order soon.

I look at her and can't believe everything has turned out so perfectly.  

She's obsessed with animal noises, sheep, cows, dinosaurs, lol.  We have lots of fun on car journeys, she loves her nursery rhyme CD (although I admit it drives me nuts), I can't count how many times we have listened to incy wincy spider and I have caught sight of her in her carseat doing the actions.

I would say to anyone looking into adoption that it may be a long and hard road to travel but the rewards are immense.  To look at your child and know that, no matter what obstacles were put in the way, they were meant to be with you, is the best feeling.  I'm not eloquent enough to express how amazing it is, I wish I was.
Xx


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