# is running out of hope fast



## maybeoneday1979 (Jan 10, 2012)

Hi, im going through FET just now been taking HRT 4mg since fri & pessaries. 

This is my 2nd FET had a BFN in dec 2011. i had 2 viles left with 4 embies got a call from the hosp this morning that 3  embies look like there not going to make it and 1 that is left doesnt look that strong either so they are going to call me 2morrow morning to let me know how its going, im bked in for thurs for transfer but im not holding out to much hope now.

Is there any1 thats experinced similar circumstances & had a BFP at the end of it.

Im totally struggling to kp it together my sis has just announced she preg im happy for her but my family are not the most understanding i feel bad about it all ive distance myself from every1.

thank u j xxx


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## sugarsweet (Dec 27, 2011)

sorry to hear that hun i dont have advice on this as i'm just thinking about going in to my first fet but i only have one hatching blast and this is one of my concerns can i ask were any of your embie's blast ? x


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## cherraberra (Sep 18, 2011)

Hi Maybeoneday1979,

I'm the same as sugarsweet - i'm sorry to hear things are not going well - i wish u all the luck in the world that things work out for you. I have no advice as i'm starting my first ever FET later this month and i only have 1 frozen embie blast and i'm also afraid that it might not make it. 

    xx


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## maybeoneday1979 (Jan 10, 2012)

Thank u for ur replies. Unfortunately my little snowbabe never survived im heartbroken!
Don't know what's nxt for us the waiting list is terrible where I live it's 3 and a half yrs so I think we might pay for it .

I wish u both all the luck in the world on ur journeys.
Hope u have happiness @ the end.

Much love & baby dust xxxxxxxx


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## teresa b (Aug 31, 2008)

Hi Maybeoneday.

I'm so sorry to hear your sad news  devastated for you!

I can relate to your circumstances regarding your sister and family. The same thing happened to me  I found out from my Mum 2 days after my 2nd failed attempt! I was heartbroken because my sister already had two children and never spoke of wanting more! My sister gets very jealous of peoples happiness and wants what they have so I feel she got pregnant to steal my limelight ! She claims the pregnancy was an accident yet she admitted to my Mum that she'd hoped we'd be pregnant together (like I'd want to share that moment with anyone!).
My eldest Nephew is almost 16 & my Niece is 10 so there is no way my sister would have left it so long if she desperately wanted and third child!
I to distanced myself from my sister while she was pregnant but I was honest to her and told her I found it to devastating to be around and needed some time, she took it to the extreme and barely even spoke to me the whole 9mths! This caused a hugh bust up with the family because she claimed I was punishing her cause she was pregnant and I wasn't !!! I felt my family came down more on her side because they really don't understand how I'm feeling!
Even now my little Nephew is 15mths old and I barely see him because my relationship with my sister is still very strained because she makes absolutely zero effort to understand my situation or to try and repair the damage she has caused by her lies!! Had she been honest from the start then yes I still would have found it hard but there would be all this bitterness !!

I do feel for you and really hope you manage to find some even ground with your family! 

I have had two more failures (3 self funded cycles refused more funding due to postcode lottery) since then and still feel my family don't really understand 

I wish you every success with whatever you decide to do next xx


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## maybeoneday1979 (Jan 10, 2012)

Hi teresa,

i really understand how u are feeling as it sems with my little bro & sister everything they always land on there feet. Im hurting so much just now i knew it was going to be tough but i totally under estimated the feelings im going through just now. It seems to feel worse cos none of my snowbabies got transferred this time so never had the chance to take to my body.

Luckily my health board has put more money in so going through a fresh icsi cycle in march i cant believe it i was in total shock when i heard something to focus on.

i hope u have success and ur family understand 1 day im trying so hard not to fall out with any1 but there not the most sensetive of people. 

ive got my nephew 1st birthday party this wk god knows were ill find the strength for it wish the world would just swallow me up.


Thanks again for ur reply makes it a bit easier knowing there is people know how u r feeling .

baby dust thank u J xxxxxx


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## teresa b (Aug 31, 2008)

I totally understand how u feel sweetie, its so very hard 
I found it so hard my my sister had my Nephew, I fraught back the tears! I couldn't hold him and even now 15mths on I still struggle but I think thats because I don't think I can ever totally forgive my sister for how she hurt me   she doesn't even ask how I am, its a about her!!!!

I said to my Mum that I wish you could all feel my pain for just one day then you would all know Im not being nasty but infact Im actually dying inside!!! I told them all there is only one thing more painful than having a baby and thats not being able to have a baby !!!

Everytime I go round Mum's all he is the baby this the baby that  
Ive distance myself quite a bit because for once in my life I am putting myself first!!

The Health board ?? Whats that ? Great news though, like you say it gives you something to focus on  

If you ever did to chat just message me.
I turely wish u every success in the future


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## maybeoneday1979 (Jan 10, 2012)

hi Teresa,  

the health board puts money in for funding for treatment as in Scotland u get 2 free shots on the nhs so i thought my 2nd shot was going tobe 3 and a half yrs but they put more money in so getting done in March im so happy its the only thing keeping me going.


I hope u get some luck soon its so tough for any1 going through it i think its not documented enough!

The same to u just drop me a msg if u feel the need to rant.

mch lve to u lots and lots of baby dust to u xxxx


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