# Tinks and Mr C's Roller Coaster ride to be parents



## do dreams come true

We where do i begin it's been one hell of a emotional Roller Coaster ride 
Firstly let me tell you all a little bit about us we met 18 years ago and although Mr C was a lot older than me i knew he was the man i wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We had been together 6 year when we started trying to conceive and after coming off the pill we started to think something was wrong after nothing happened in a year. So we consulted our GP who referred us to our local infertility clinic. Fast forward 6 failed IUI'S and we started our first IVF in 2005 which failed and we were both heartbroken.
I mean why us why were we being put through this when all we want was to do what comes naturally to most couples and have a family.
As we met when i was still at school all my friends were now parents and even on to their second yet i was the only one still with the same boyfriend and no child why was that fair  

I struggled on believing that we were meant to be parents no matter how it happened. We had to wait a further 4 years to start our next IVF due to NHS funding and we went on to have a further 3 failed cycles our last 2011
It really took its toll on my body and i spent a lot of time in and out of hospital with hyper stimulation effects. Again with nothing to show for everything we had gone through.
We had no funding to pay for any more IVF and had used all of our free cycles. Our specialist said there was no reason for us not too fall naturally and to keep on trying. He asked had we considered adoption and to maybe look into it. 
Well we took time out and tried to get back to being a couple and do things we enjoyed together.
One thing for certain i am not the same person i was when we started on our roller coaster 13 years ago.
Infertility changes you as a person and you definitely find out who your friends are along the way.

Well me and Mr C moved into our very own3 bedroom house back in May 2013 with the intention of adoption and starting our own little family.

We sent the registration of interest form off at the beginning of Oct and attended prep course 31st Oct and 1st Nov 2013
i must admit they were intense and we got to look through be my parent magazine. Which had to be the most heartbreaking yet exciting thing i have had to do. It felt like looking through a argos catalogue all those children there posing for their for ever families how on earth do you chose  
We came across 3 beautiful little girls and we fell in love 

However these were old magazines so they were most likely adopted.

We thought we wanted a little girl 0-6 but our SW said keep and open mind and boy she was right here we were looking at 3 little girls the oldest being 8 

So this is our story so far   we've had ups and downs hopefully there are more ups ahead


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## Emma-is-a-mummy

Hi tinker bell

Just wanted to wish you luck with your journey it really is a rollercoaster but sooooooo worth it. 

Big hugs xxxxx


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## Sq9

Good luck with your journey


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## flickJ

Good luck Tinkerbell - you have had a tough time already and hopefully your journey from now on will be smooth and exciting


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## do dreams come true

than you everyone heres hoping x


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## do dreams come true

hi everyone
well had an email from adoption team to say they have sent our CRB forms off and received MR C. 's medical forms so just me to have mine now.
I've more or less finished home study but MR C. has to do his so he'll have to get started.
hope everyone else is well x


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## Mummy DIY Diva

Good luck with your journey hope it's quick and smooth from here on x


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## do dreams come true

well it's now been 4 month since i last posted in here and they have been a hard few month.
Although it has only been a short time it has felt like an eternity to get to this stage.
Finally we are only 3 weeks away from panel and expecting to read PAR Tuesday, hopefully.
I must admit there have been times i was ready to give up and accept that maybe we are meant to be on our own and move on with our lives. But i stuck it through and we are almost there.
I don'y know how i'm going to make it through the next few weeks i'm already off my food and getting tension headaches. 
So i'll just have to take each day as it comes luckily i have work as a distraction.


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## Mummy DIY Diva

The waiting is the bit I always struggle with most.  I like the busy periods so I feel I'm in control a bit getting things done xx


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## do dreams come true

yeah it is Diva  
well just read our PAR really strange seeing your whole life written down in black and white


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## Miny Moo

Wow, things sure seem to be moving fast for people in the approval stage of adoption now, good luck x


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## do dreams come true

thank you  
well sw has just been and gone through PAR
also to tell us that she is leaving the agency to work for another so won't be with us for the family finding stage. 
But when we were going through stage 1 we had another sw with a student sw who was lovely and they have got a job with the agency. This sw will be taking over to do the family finding if we are approved at panel.
I got very emotional at tonight's visit as i can't believe we are finally at this stage 
14 years of infertility/IVF and tears of the BNF's, only for it all to be left in the panels hands to decide weather or not we will finally be mummy and daddy  
pretty scary stuff


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## do dreams come true

well after being approved at panel last week the search begins to find our LO  
strange to think she is out there somewhere waiting for our paths to cross


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## Mummy DIY Diva

Really hope it's a quick match.  Huge congratulations on approval x


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## Wyxie

Congratulations on being approved.  I hope you have a quick match, and in the meantime that you are able to enjoy your remaining time as a couple now that you know it's "when" not "if".

Best wishes,

Wyxie xx


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## do dreams come true

well here we are still searching for out little girl.   
had a potential match a week ago but we were not the chosen couple and we were so certain she was the one.     After viewing over 100 profiles and thinking it was never going to happen getting the gut feeling.
We took a week to pull ourselves together  
We have viewed a few profiles but i don't feel like i'll ever get  this gut feeling again.
Never thought that there were so many children with life threatening illnesses out there. We expected children who had been neglected, ill treated, learning difficulties and abused but most profiles we have viewed are of children with life limiting illnesses. 
All this waiting and searching is emotional


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## Jacks girl

We are finding the same on all the adoption profile sites. As yet we have not seen one CPR from our LA.
Sending you     xxxx


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## DRocks

The waiting is so tough for sure!
Your little girl is out there as is mine but they are sure taking their sweet time lol

I wish I was able to say we would take a child with life limiting conditions but we just can't and it makes the search so much harder x


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