# Insensitivity of embryologists



## anicca79 (Sep 29, 2012)

Hi everyone

I hope I can be allowed on this board as I am 40 next June. I have just had a failed IVF cycle. Although we are so blessed to have a little girl already nobody could have prepared me for how difficult this is.

Our embrologist didn't exactly help. In updates he said 'yeah well this one is turning black'. I can't get the words out of my head. Like not only did it not work but it was diseased somehow. I feel so broken. I think if he had just said 'these didn't make it' I would have coped so much better. Has anyone experienced this?


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## coldhandswarmheart (Nov 22, 2014)

Hi there
I'm so sorry for you, what a horrible experience for you. As if going through these incredibly difficult emotional experiences, we don't have enough to deal with.

I'm sorry to say, in our 3 rounds of IVF we had a lot of this. The worst was when I encountered an embryologist who rang to tell me we'd "lost" all 8 or our embryos on day 3 - and just said "you have nothing" - which, when I queried what she meant (I simply couldn't get my head around the horror of it) actually got very rude and aggressive with me for questioning her. I burst into tears and she still said nothing except "what else do you want me to say?". We made an official complaint to the clinic about this person but nothing was done as far as I'm aware.

I can't really see how they'd be working in the profession without being more sensitive to the incredibly fragile couples they are dealing with, but apparently they are.

So sorry again. Hope you're doing okay. Sending big big hugs
x


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