# Shall I try for number 3? Frosties..



## Raa raa (Oct 20, 2011)

Hello my first post here.
DD 4y after 4y ttc, DS 18m 
2 fresh IVF for DD, 2 FET then 1 fresh IVF for DS
now aged 42y
2 frosties from DD cycle, 4 frosties from DS cycle (3 poor quality)

I kind of feel if there's another child in there they should be given a chance.
DH never wanted children at all, so i guess i've done really well.
Had a terrible pregnancy last time-my health wise, both my babies small. 1st SCBU. 
Had terrible anxiety last pregnancy 1st trimester. Terror that baby would be very disabled and how that would impact on our happy family life. Didnt believe I could be so lucky.
Think I would cope well with a third, after birth i mean.
Maybe its not a good idea to have another just because I feel its the right thing to do.
Maybe I dont want a third enough. 
But I think its the thought of another pregnancy/worry about baby not being healthy thats holding me back. Plus knowing DH would be strongly against. And how can you really want another when you know its only 50/50 chance at best. You cant really get excited about it can you.
I would have done ANYTHING for a second. But for a third i feel, what will be, will be.
Anyway, going to have the chat soon with DH, then book fert counsellor.
Any thoughts gratefully appreciated, especially if you are/have been in my position.

How can I go to the clinic and let them perish? How?
I need to go for it soon if i do because I feel too old anyway as it is and i dont want big age gaps..
thanks for reading


----------



## Bubblicious (Jul 8, 2010)

Raa Raa, you are where I was a little while ago .... wondering what was for the best.  I had questions about whether I could manage another, whether I was going for #3 for the right reasons, how I could just let my two frosties perish.  DH pretty much left the decision to me as he said it was my body that I was going to putting through another treatment and possibly another pregnancy.  I was desperate for #2 but felt differently with #3.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, we got a BFN from our medicated FET and I'm glad we gave our frosties a shot but what it made me realise is that I'd love another baby.  We won't have any further treatment as it was so emotionally draining and took away too much from my children ... money, time, attention.

We've spoken about trying naturally as I guess, it might be an option for us but I don't want to get back to where ttc dominates everything again so I've been thinking about counselling, too.  IF can really affect every aspect of life and even when you have your family and should find it easy to move on, somehow it's not that simple.

Good luck, whatever you decide.


----------



## Raa raa (Oct 20, 2011)

Thanks Bubbs for taking the time to reply.
Will speak to DH this easter. Think I'm really scared he'll say no, hence putting it off.
xx


----------

