# Newbie here, just starting out with fertility treatment *



## newtondtcers (Dec 28, 2007)

Hi all

Thought I'd give you a bit of background, me and H got married in July 06 and decided to TTC in November - we were extremely lucky and got a BFP Christmas day 06, sadly i lost our baby early Jan 07 and we've been struggling ever since. H had some tests done in Oct and again NOV and both showed Low Morphs (2% normal) and low ish mortality *can't remember %* 

I'm so depressed about it all, i just want to cry all the time, all i keep thinking is i should be holding a baby in my arms, and instead I'm holding a letter telling me to go to a fertility consultant. 

we have an appointment for mid Jan, so at least the start of it is happening quite quickly, i know they are more than likely going to tell me to lose weight, I'm very over weight, but i have been dieting and have lost just over a stone in 7 weeks, (including 3 weeks of birthdays and Christmas do's) so not doing to bad i guess. Just need to get back on track now. 

H has cut out booze, coffee, choc's and everything thats supposedly not good for him, i don't really drink. Not sure what else we can do, he's taking a whole host of vitamins which we researched and went and bought. I'm just hoping that will help. 

I'm fearing the worst and thinking we are going to need some sort of treatment, be it iui, ivf or icsi, I'm petrified of that as i have a fear of needles, i kind of resent my H has all he needs to do if produce a sample and I'm going to have to be injected and prodded and poked etc, but at the same time i know it's not really his fault.

Sorry that has turned into a bit of a rant

Thanks

Cxx


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## FairyDust2012 (Jun 5, 2007)

hi there and welcome to ff, you get alot of support here hun what ever happens.

Im so sorry about ur miscarriage!

Do u have any investigations?  I have PCOS you see which effects my cycles..

Hugs 
xx


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## newtondtcers (Dec 28, 2007)

i had a few cycles where i didn't ovulate but i think that was stress releated.

apart from that nothing else has been investigated, i'm presuming that what will happen with this consultant, but i've no idea, what will happen.


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Hello newtondtcers, welcome to Fertility Freinds. 

Sorry to hear of your recent loss and your struggles since.  You do sound very down at the moment and I am sure it cannot help coming up to the first anniversary of your loss. I remember feeling all at sea and lost when I was in the same boat as you and did not know what, if any, treatment I would end up having. It is natural to completely assume the worst all the time but try not to get too ahead of yourself. 
Well done on your weight loss so far. That's a nice steady way to lose it and yes, you will probably be told to lose more as regardless of what problems there might be as it seems fairly standard to say this even for ladies just a little bit overweight. Your DH is doing a great job cutting back on all that is bad for him and it can and does often make a difference. Most ladies here would love to have a DH like yours as, sadly, quite a lot of them can be rather resistant to efforts to improve sperm quality, so you obviously have a great suportive husband!  It might be worth having another SA done in 3 months to see if it has improved things. It takes 3 months to make sperm so he'd have to be taking care of himself for at least that long to show any difference. You could also look at other complimentary methods which might help you.

I will leave you some links that I hope will prive useful and informative:

*Meanings ~ *CLICK HERE

*FERTILITY INFO GUIDES ~ *CLICK HERE

*Male factors ~ *CLICK HERE

*Complimentary Therapies ~ *CLICK HERE 

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. This is especially useful to find people who may be using the same clinic and or in the same PCT area.

You might also like to join the Belly Buddies part of this site. It is a hidden area (i.e. not accesible to the public or all members due to the nature of discussions and disclosure there) and you have to ask to be admitted but permission is usually granted straight away. Here's a link for it: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=54750.285

Wishing you lots of luck with your appointment. I hope that you can try and remain positive and don't let those negative thoughts weigh you down too much.

C~x


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

& Welcome to FF  Newtondtcers   
I am sorry to read of your M/C and this being a year since must make it harder 
It would appear you are doing a lot to improve your chances posting here on FF will help you imensley, the early stages of investigations is daunting but there is lots of Infomation here to help make it easier.

I am going to leave you some direct links to boards here on FF - that you may or may not have found, I encourage you to post in these areas to build friendships and support from members who really do have an understanding of your situation,

Starting out & Diagnosis ~
CLICK HERE

FAQ ~
CLICK HERE

Pregnancy loss 
CLICK HERE

Forget me not ~ A place for our members to remember their loved but lost babies. CLICK HERE

G&B - Community board
CLICK HERE

To make the site easier to navigate click on the index tab at the top of any page - pink hearts mean there is something new within the board you have not read/looked at and if you scroll right down you will see the last ten posts from all over FF all are clickable  if you refresh this page (f5) it will update the last ten posts as well as the boards/threads and who's online!!!
take some time to look at the *help tab* too 

Check out the *Locations boards* for where you live & a site search for your *clinic* 

Wishing you Friendship  &    


If you need any help just ask! 
~Dizzi~


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

hi newtond

at least you have the jan appointment so not long to wait there. im sorry to hear about your loss, i have had a miscarraige too and i recommend counselling as it helped me with the grief.

yeah, your BMI is important when TTC should be 25 or less, but lots of people conceive over that im sure, youre doing really well espec for this time of year!

IF you ever needed treatment and need injections, IF you did, then apparently there like the oneds diabetics use like little "stud gun" things and arent as bad as you think ( i will be finding out soon so i will let u know!!)

yeah its not fair that the man gets to get jiggy with a magazine while we have to "relax our legs" who'd be a woman hey!!

just take it one day at a time see a counsellor and count down to your jan appointment, and i recommend you write down any questions you have and take them to the appointment as you always forget everything when youre there

good luck xx


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

AvonQueen I think you will find recomended BMI varies from clinic to clinic
but under 30 is the recomended guideline. 
I have had a tx cycle with a bmi of 31. 

~Dizzi~


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## newtondtcers (Dec 28, 2007)

thanks all for the replies and the links, i have a friend who has unexplained infertility - she's also overweight, quite a bit bigger than i am. she saw a consultant earlier this year, and he told her that she needed to lose 10% of her body weight and they would start her treatment, if they tell me to lose 10% of what i weigh on appointment day, i know it can be done, and i would make sure it's done for next appointment. i just want to lose as much as possible.


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## eggsharer (Oct 22, 2007)

Just to put your mind at rest i have spent my whole life fainting everytime i have an injection - or any other procedure i literally get myself in such a state i hyperventilate then faint.  My mum caried smelling salts in her handbag for years and when i had a verucca frozen off at 20 years old my dad had to come with me (mum couldn't go) and i fainted. Anyway i was frightened of the needles and started sweating when nurse just showed me and didn't even do one.  First night my DH did it i thought wasn't too bad actually, by a couple of days later i was actually watching him do them then one night he was late home and i did it myself!  So i guess i am kinda cured now.  We had IVF and none of it is that bad i could do it again for sure (hopefully do't have to though as it worked first time).  So please don't let the injections bit worry you as its really not that bad.

Regarding loosing weight i am not particularly overweight but wanted to loose a bit for myself so i hired a personal trainer one day a week £25 per hour but its sometimes less elsewhere (I figured i would be happy to pay £100 per month to sort my weight out).  Best thing i ever did as i really noticed the difference and am now so much more confident in the gym and fitter.  Course i can't go now as pregnant possibly with twins and have overstimulated but i am suprised to say i actually miss it as i hated the gym before.

Good luck with whatever happens next x


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## emsy25 (Mar 18, 2005)

Hi,

Just wanted to say hello and welcome.

Emma
x x x x


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

Dizzi

Really?! Oh thats better, i didnt realise


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

My clinic has a recomendation of no more than 30 but that is only for egg sharing (it's the same clinic as Dizzi's actually). Other than that I think they treat anyone regardless of BMI - may be not those with extremely high BMI.  
However you have made a good point that the lower the BMI (obviously within the recomended guidelines) the better, not just for general health but for reproductive health too.

C~x


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

thanks caz  

im 5 foot 2 and was 11 stone and the nurse told me "your ok as you are but try and lose some weight if you can" to which i replied "im going to kfc on the way home" she just said "ok, just this once" - said that because of all the bad news she had just given me, a girl has to have some fun some of the time!! a visit to the hospital always seems to end in a tearful drivethru!!!! have managed to go down to 10.5 stone now though to show willing    xx

best of luck to you all for 2008 xxxxx


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

Tonight is Newbie Night in the Chat room 8pm
- do pop in and say  To Caz & I
The chat room has various themed sessions each week, 
Details of these can be found on the main index page 
The chat room is open 24/7 with lots of support, fun & friendship to be found.
We already Offer one2one Chats by prior arrangement CLICK HERE


For help in getting into the chatroom  CLICK HERE


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## Kamac80 (Nov 24, 2005)

Hi and welcome to the site 

You have come to a fantastic place full of advice and support and i wish you loads of luck with everything.

Kate xx​


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