# Hello! I'm new to this site. and to infertility treatment... *



## Helena M (Jan 28, 2008)

Hi there,

My name is Helena and I am new to this site. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for the last 1.5 years and we've found out thay we are suffering from 'male factor infertility'. After trying a healthier life style for a few months we have now been recommended ICSI and I'm starting my first cycle next month.

I've felt very powerless, and upset over the last few months especially as our infertility news coincided with a very difficult situation in our family life, and my husband hasn't wanted to talk about it a lot, I feel I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that this infertility is the truth and if we want a family we need treatment.

I am very scared of IVF, worried about all the drugs, and even more the potential dissappointment, and I would be very interested in sharing some stories with others who have gone through this. I also feel sad that I'm having to go through all this treatment, and there doesn't seem to be a focus on treating male infertility issues.

I am 30 and have a good career and am worried about work, I am not keen to tell them, but worried the treatment will have an impact on my performance.

Not sure what else to write for the moment, but I've found the postings on this site very helpful so far, 

H


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## PMA (Jan 5, 2008)

Hi Helena

I am in the same position as you, although a year older   i have a very busy job which involves lots of travelling and i am about to start injecting on the 16th of Feb. It is daunting, i am trying to be positive and take each day as it comes, i have just bought my DH a book which is about ivf from a man's perspective, which will hopefully help him to understand it all. He does feel guilty as it is us girls who have to be a pin cushion!

hope it works out for the both of us


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## Helena M (Jan 28, 2008)

Hi, wow quick reply, yes my job involves lots of travelling too, which is what worries me. I am trying to keep the 'IVF period' free of travelling, are you managing that?

I will start with Oestrogen tablets at the end of February and injecting in March.

Hope it works for us both as well, let me know if you have any good tips,

H


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## msjulie (Nov 24, 2007)

Hi Helena

Welcome to this wonderful site, i think the way your feeling is normal and undertstandable, i felt the same way when i first thought about ivf but now i try not to worry about anything else but getting the miracle we want so much and if that means missing abit of work then so be it.

Julie.x


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Hello Helena, welcome to Fertility Friends. 

I am sorry you are struggling a bit with your feeligns over needing IVF. It is very demoralising in many ways to be told you need extensive medical help to do the one basic thing you are designed to to. 
Work is always a tricky issue. On the whole, honesty is usually the best policy, although that does not always pay off, depending on your role and co-workers / management structure. You will be surprised though - sometimes it is co-workers who offer you the best support during these times. Only you will know if it is suitable to tell them. Are you reluctant to do so because you are ashamed of having to have tx, or because you are afraid that it will impact your prospects / overall status within your company? 
You can also always get around the situation by either asking your GP to sign you off for a few weeks (with just a gynae thing - you can tell them it's an op and you'll need some recovery time, they don't need to know it's IVF and, if you have a sympathetic doctor he/she will understand that) or perhaps take combined sick leave / holiday. It's very difficult to judge but, do not underestimate how mentally consuming doing IVF can be - you will eat sleep and think IVF for the duration of treatment and, the drugs can do silly things to you too!  If you really don't want to tell them, can you tell them you are having some personal issues and finding it hard to keep your mind on your job and ask for some personal time? Or, perhaps, work from home as much as possible? Just be sure to put your own needs first and not those of your employer - you work to live not the other way around!

I will leave you some links that you can check out:

*What Every New Member Needs To Know ~ *   CLICK HERE

*Words, Meanings & Jargon ~ *CLICK HERE

*Male factors ~ *CLICK HERE

*ICSI ~ *CLICK HERE

*Cycle buddies ~ *CLICK HERE

*Girl & Boy talk - Community board ~ *CLICK HERE

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. This is especially useful to find people who may be using the same clinic and or in the same PCT area.

Wishing you lots of luck! 

C~x


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## Loubie101 (Aug 20, 2005)

Hi, just want to say hello and welcome to FF   Good luck with your treatment 

xx


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## Beanie_35 (Jan 29, 2008)

Hi Helena

Your posting describes my feelings last June when I realised I would have to go through IVF with ICSI because of Male factor. You have to take each day at a time.. This is the only way to cope.  I am also working full time with a lot of responsibility.  I only told one person which allowed me to take any necessary time off.  I feel I couldn't cope with all the questions from everyone else.. That and the fact that three girls in the office were pregnant at the time!

My 2 sisters have 8 kids between them and my brother has five kids... here I am struggling to have one!

I am on my second round now and am currently down regulating.. If you need any information or just need to chat, don't hesitate to contact me.. You will have good days and bad days.  I get through them by thinking of other area's in my life where I have luck and happiness.. Let me know what your cycle is and remember to Keep the faith..

Also, one point on Male factor, our Doctor really pushed us to get further tests done for my DH with a Urologist.  We then discovered that he has the equivalent to early male menopause..We have to start freezing sperm.  He has also been put on medication as this can lead to osteoporosis in early years and other complications.  It is worth just getting to the root cause..

best of look again
xxx
Beanie


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## Rebecca247 (Jan 28, 2008)

Hi Helena,

Welcome to the boards.  I am a new member but have found everyone to be above-and-beyond friendly and helpful here.  My husband and I also have male factor infertility which we discovered in December '06 after trying for 2+ years unsuccessfully.  I know exactly how frustrating it is to be faced with male factor without having really an explanation or a cause, and no way to resolve it without ART.  It seems like so little is known sometimes about it.  We just had to embrace IVF and ICSI as the way toward having children for us and fortunately for us, after two tries we had success today with a positive test result.  Best of luck to you and I hope you can find a way to manage work and all the necessary treatment!


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## Skybreeze (Apr 25, 2007)

Hi Helena!

Welcome to FF!! NIce to have you here....  

Good luck with your ICSI next month!
Take care
Natalie xxxxxx


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## Kamac80 (Nov 24, 2005)

Hi and welcome to the site 

You have come to a fantastic place full of advice and support and i wish you loads of luck with everything.

Kate xx​


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## kellyjayne (Jan 27, 2008)

Hi Helena, I only discovered FF a few days ago, its a fab site, My husband and I have been married for 17 years this August and are having our first IVF/ICSI cycle now, I am having egg collection tomorrow!!
I have had all the tests going and my husband eventually had to have surgical sperm retrieval due to retrograde ejaculation. The injections and things have been absolutely fine up to know, but the next stages are I think going to be a rough ride!  I can think of 4 hurdles to get through from tomorrow.
Anyway, I wish you all the very best with your first cycle of Icsi.  
Regards
Kelly xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 30, 2008)

The best of luck Kelly   and I'm sure you will make alot of new friends along the way  

Tanya


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## emsy25 (Mar 18, 2005)

Hi,

Just wanted to say hello and welcome.

Emma
x x x x


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## PMA (Jan 5, 2008)

Hi Helena.

I hope you are ok, my drugs are arriving tomorrow and i start injecting or down regging on the 16th. DH bought a cool bag for my injections just in case i am away! i have a facial booked for this weekend and a massage for next! then the injections start . i don't know about you but i am really tring not to think about it which is hard as 2 of my SIL are pregnant and my bridesmaid! we are currently not drinking, DH is taking selenium which was recommended by our specialist. keep in touch and lots of


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## DizziSquirrel (Feb 15, 2005)

& Welcome to FF  Helena  

To make the site easier to navigate click on the index tab at the top of any page - pink hearts mean there is something new within the board you have not read/looked at and if you scroll right down you will see the last ten posts from all over FF all are clickable  if you refresh this page (f5) it will update the last ten posts as well as the boards/threads and who's online!!!
take some time to look at the *help tab* too 

Check out the *Locations boards* for where you live & a site search for your *clinic* 

Wishing you Friendship  &    


If you need any help just ask! 
~Dizzi~


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## Helena M (Jan 28, 2008)

Hi all, wow I have only just worked out I had so many replies and how to check them. Thank you all so much for our kind words and messages, I do think this site is fantastic!

H


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