# TTC Another Miracle Part 3



## Tillypops

New home ladies! Happy chatting and good luck.

Tilly
xxxxxx


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## KG

ooh... a new home for us! Just bookmarking.

Kx


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## sabah m

Ooooh KG, you got there first!


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## Kuki2010

Hello my ladies,

Tillypops, thank you so much..

Let it be a new lucky one please..

Love and luck to you all. 

Kukixx


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## sabah m

Why why why can't we just have our contentment last a little longer than it does?  I seriously have been happier than ages, loving life, loving DS, getting on with stinking diet relatively ok....then someone has to go destabilise me again by anouncing their second pregnancy!!!! Her first is 7 months older than mine, so I know it shouldn't really matter but I wanted to kill her!!!!!!! I was so upset, I was in church so could not even just hide somewhere and let it out.  I had to pretend hayfever was striking me when tears started rolling.  My freind knows about my failed tx, and I know she was trying to be as sensitive as possible, but as you know ladies, there is no best way to make such an announcement.  Why did it affect me so much, is this what the rest of my life is going to be like if I don't have another one  Really sorry for putting such a negative post, no one else understands


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## KG

Awww, Sabah, sending you hugs. We've all been there, I think, and some people's pregnancies affect me more than others, I don't know why. I think when we've been through what we all have there will always be a touch of sadness when someone else is pg, but hopefully it will ease with time. 

Kx


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## Kuki2010

Dear Sabah,
I hope now you are feeling a bit better.
I think my feelings will not go away till I have more. Or till I can no longer bear a child. For me this is about 47+. I think it will be difficult for me to carry child anything over that. Till than I will live in hope and long for more babies..
It is awful.. Absolutely awful feeling.. And it eats you away silently.. We can pretent that is okay but it isnot really.
I wish I had so much money so I can do the best treatments with all for so many times so I can have my babies.. And of course wish it all for you too..
Thinking of you..
Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Hello Lovely Ladies xxx

Sabah I understand completely where you are coming from - it's much the same here happily going along and then bang back in the pit of IF despair, last week as well as AF showing up had to deal with one of DH's friends had their 2nd baby, it was the ******** announcement that done me in including the line "our lives are complete" I just thought "well bully for you cause mines not and you will never know the pain or torment me and DH have suffered" god I really am a bitter old cow aren't I!!!
Hope you are feeling a bit better and cut yourself some slack hun, it's times like this I wished we all lived near each other so we could have little therapy sessions!!

Kuki - hey, any more test results from Dr G ?? xxx

Hello to everyone else Daisy, Sarah, KG anyone else I have missed xx

Having HSG on Wednesday not looking forward to it but will let you know outcome... 
And after feeling like crap for over a week I booked a nice little week in Cyprus at the end of the month, taking advantage of no medication and scans to work around then hopefully back on it all late July ..

Love to all
Lou
Xx


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## Kuki2010

Loo,
Yes we have DQ Alpha test came through and we are 25% match and the others very similiar. I am waiting for LAD and NK cells test so we can go back to see Dr. Gorgy again for plan of action.
And my period is came this evening after 3 weeks late. Increadible.. Mucked up all our plans for FET in August. Now will have to be in Sep instead.. I need to check the dates again.. 
Good luck for HCG.. We will get there.. Just very hard sometimes.. 
Love. Kukixx


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## daisy-may

ah ha !!! found you !!!!


will catch up with the news tomorrow when dex is sleeping ...


love and hugs daisy xx


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## Loopy Loo

Hello....

Well had HSG very uncomfortable and now feel very bloated and a bit sore but all is well with womb and tubes!! Yippee now if I could just my ovaries to play ball ....
As only on CD8 we will try naturally this month as got to wait for DH to have repeat SA done before I can re start clomid...

On a separate note how annoying are consultants secretaries  I could quite easily line them all up and poke them in the eye with a sharp stick!! Tried to book an appointment for after DH's SA and she was so unhelpful and it felt like she was accusing me of lying about what the Dr had said !!!

Kuki - hope you get your dates sorted for FET, bloody periods arrive when you don't want them and stay away when you do!! Hope next meeting with Dr G goes well and you have a plan xxx

Daisy - hello !! How are babies xxx

Anyway have taken co codamol so am a bit spaced out, going to lay on the sofa xxx

Lou
Xxx


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## sarahc

Hi everyone

Just book marking, awaiting period then back to clomid dr gave me a prescription.

Q. I had ewcm on cd15 and we BD, but since sunday which would have been cd28 I've been having intermittent ewcm again? Never had before a period and there was loads of it sunday, and then bits and pieces since and then loads today? Am I ovulating again?

will do personals at wknd when more time, dp just made roast chix yummy!! So off to enjoy xxxxx


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## Kuki2010

Sarah,
I do ovulate around CD15-16-17. Than about 4 days later I get similar things. And shows me that my egg has not fertilized and just getting ready for AF.. Well I think that what happens.. 

AFM, monday I am going to be 41. I cannot believe it. I am soooo getting old and tired with baby making business.. 

Have a lovely weekend all.
Love. Kukixx


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## sarahc

Thanks Kuki  thought I was going mad lol

Happy birthday for monday hope you have a lovely day and get spoilt rotten xxxx


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## Kuki2010

Sarah,
Thank you. I don't think I will get spoilt rotten. A bit depressing still not completed the family. Another ege and another year of triying.. 
Trying to be posiitive though.. 
Meant to go to the shops today. Changed my mind. Will do it tomorrow. Going to clean my flat insteady.. but feel so much better after probably. It is 11.30 and on the sofa watching the parade on tv.. Not doing well..
Love. Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Happy birthday for Monday Kuki - I hope you have a lovely day. I know birthdays etc... Are hard as it's another year trying to complete your family, try spoil yourself a bit have a drink because hopefully by next birthday you will be caring for your new baby xx

Hope everyone else is ok xxx


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## Kuki2010

Loo,
Thank you darling. I wish I could just believe I am going to have another one. Cos of all the last failures I lost my hope and I think I am not going to have it.. 
But when you put it like that.. Oh lovely.. I really hope so.. Got to start believing so it can happen..
Did not go to shops in the end but had 2 glass of wine last night. Was good. Shall do the same tonight..
It is absolute a miserable day today.. Hope it is better where you are..
Love. Kukixx


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## KG

Kuki, sending lots of birthday wishes for tomorrow. I know that it feels like another year gone, but I am sure it is another year closer to achieving your goal and completing your family. Hope your family spoil you rotten tomorrow, you so deserve it.

Kx


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## daisy-may

Happy birthday Kuki !!!!!!!!!


Lots love daisy xxx


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## Kuki2010

Oh Darlings, you are all so lovely!!
MILs coming over tonight to take care of Lara when Tom takes me out for dinner. Will be nice. We have not done this for years..
Had a superb enter to my 41. KG thank you hun. Like you say. Got to be positive and getting closer to achieve my dream.
Daisy, how are you? ready your diary.. So glad all going great and you feeling wonderful.. 
Love to you all.. Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Happy Birthday Kuki - have a lovely time tonight xx


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## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,

Writing to you all as 41 years young. And feels good. Thank you all for your wishes.. You are all so lovely..

World is full of with nasty people.. And there are a few who are absolutely marvellous.. 

Love and luck to you all. 

Kukixx


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## Kuki2010

Daisy-may,
You made me laught with what you wrote on the diary regarding twins.. I love it.. 
Big kiss to both precious darlings..
Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Hi girls

Hope everyone is ok ? Had a really hard day with DD she is having mega tantrums that are lasting around 45 minutes also heaving and generally getting in a state! Had 2 today, don't know what's going on she was 4 last month I thought these things are supposed to calm down not get worse!!!

On a good note had a positive OPK yesterday so looks like I am doing something on my own without clomid, don't know wheather I have any decent follies though!!!

Has anyone seen or heard anything from Sleepy Penguin she hasn't been on for ages ....

Lou
xxx


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## Spanner

Hey Ladies

Can I join you as this looks like the right thread for me.
We are about to start ISCI for round 2 hoping to give our ickle boy a baby brother or sister!! Just hoping to find people on the same page which looks like you guys.

IS anyone now going through treatment?

Spanner x


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## Kuki2010

Hi Spanner, 
Welcome to the thread. I am just going through my immunes at the mo. Will cycle around August time. Good luck with yours.
Loo,
Weldone you.. Lets hope there is a golden one in there this time.. No news from SP.. Where are you SP?
KG, hope it is well with you.. You are my inspration don't forget.. Look after that darling inside well. 
Sabah, how is it going? You have been quiet?
Lots of love and luck to all.
Kukixx


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## Spanner

I start my immunes on tuesday 28 June - schedule for EC first week in August  
Just a long way to go yet..

When is yours?

x


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## Kuki2010

Spanner,
I had my tests about 5 weeks ago. Going to Dr. Gorgy on this wed to figure out what we need to do.
High Nk Cells and border line TNF. As well as 25% DQ alpha match with DH and the other were too similar. And MTHF hetero.
So we think we have to do Paternal LIT. And lots of streiods for next FET as long as with Claxene etc.. 
My one will be around 28-29 August. In july I will have a hysterscopy too. Dr. Gorgy said I should have one.. 
I will do all for my 2 frozen embies are waiting both a low grade embies. So not expecting a lot from them..
But will do all the meds again around october time for fresh cycle in another clinic. probably reprofitt but hav enot decided yet. 
Where are you having yours done?
Lov.e Kukixx


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## Kuki2010

Spanner,
I love the name of your LO.. Oscar.. One of my favourite names for boys.. If I have son I shall call him Oscar. Goes well with Lara too. My darling daughters name. 
Kukixx


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## daisy-may

sorry never any time to post but all ok this end ....


max and daisy doing amazingly and dex is a diamond .... so really cant complain !!!!


love to all, daisy xxx


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## Loopy Loo

Hello ladies!!

Hope you are all well...

Spanner - welcome, good luck for upcoming tx. Look forward to chatting with you x

Kuki- hope u are ok, any more news on the FET what dates are you working with at the moment ? x

Daisy - Hello!! I'm surprised you have time to think let alone log on here!! Glad all is going well x

KG - how are you and bump? X

Hello everyone else xx

Well off on my holiday on Sunday cannot wait! Also cannot believe how much better I feel this month for not being on clomid, just letting everything take it's course this month not even sure what CD I am on!! 

Lou
xx


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## KG

Hi ladies, just checking in...

Lou, have a fab holiday. However much we dread a break in tx, sometimes it makes you feel so much better - like a bit of freedom! Fingers crossed you will be one of those who get a miracle when they aren't really thinking about it all!

Spanner, welcome. And loads of luck ttc no2!

Kuki, bless you! I'm certaily not feeling v inspirational right now! Just exhausted and a bit old for all this! Not complaining at all, just finding it a bit tough going at the minute. Got my dating and nuchal scan next Monday, so keeping fingers crossed for that.

Daisy, you sound so happy with all your LOs! Hope the sharing of the workload is working out a bit better.

Take care, everyone,
Kx


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## Kuki2010

KG,
I can imagine. I feel somuch older than last time. But I will cope some how. Oh next week is an important week foryou. Let us know how it goes. My god twins mother did try a FET. She had bleed till 9 weeks than her nuchal came 1 in 91. She is only 30 yearsold. And had to ahve CVS in that week to find out for sure. Cos they were hoping to stich her cervix in 12 weeks. Well CVS came okay and they did it in 13 weeks. Was absolute nightmare.. Wishing you that you will fly through.. Will be thinking of you..

Lou,
So nice to feel like that.. I honestly forgot that feels.. Trying Yoga and reading and all the technicques but not getting anywhere.. My mind seems to fixed on having a baby.. Absolute nightmare..

Daisy-may, I love reading your posts.. Makes me smile.. Hopefully one day we can write like that to here..

Tomorrow we are going to see Dr. Gorgy for our results. So many issues todeal with.. Lets see what he will say and what we can effort etc. Getting my folder ready today for him..

Sabah, where are you? Is everything okay?

Love to you all.. 
Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Kuki - good luck for tomorrow with Dr G, let us know what he says x


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## daisy-may

kuki ... you will hon, you will   


daisy x


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## sabah m

Hey ladies

Sorry for being AWOL...all is ok, apart from DH getting on my nerves, working too much, being involved in play rehearsals, feel like a single mum and friends asking how will I cope if no. 2 comes along.  There is nothing that is going to stand in the way of my tx, I am now only 41b away from reaching BMI goal, so will be booking consultation and dates for FET in a couple of weeks.  Just feeling miserable as tired, work is stressful, pulled muscle in my back wrestling with DS on stairs last week, still in agony, DH no help, pretended he would return home during the day to tidy up, knowing I am only working half day today and won't rest till place is tidy....arrrrggghhh!!  Lost buyer so not going to move now for at least a year.  I'm ok about that, just wish we had more money.  Been taking it out on kids (looking after neice this afternoon and friday afternoons) and just feeling like I never get a break, I love DS to bits but I need me time.

Just read back and seen what a me post....sorry,  Kuki hope all went well today?

Daisy


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## KG

Kuki, how did you get on with DrG?

Kx


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## Kuki2010

Darlings,

Don't know where to start but did a little summary to signature. It tells most of it. 

I am organising the hysteroscopy with turkish doctor. it will be the day we arrive to Istanbul. 27th of july or following. After the op. We will travel over 800miles to south of Turkey to mum's summer house.

I have to get Intralipids in Turkey. DR. G said it will be cheaper and no point to take it from here. I have to have 2 before my ET. Maybe one before and one after. I have to double check this.

I can not have LIT treatment. Cos Dr. Gorgy is full. I am on the waiting list. This is to get LAD normal and wil help NK Cells. We have decided if we get it fine if not we will have it done in next fresh cycle. My Turkish doc says this is waste of time and money. It is not proven.. Yes yes we know but.. it seems to do the magic for so many.. 

Well shock was finding out I have Chylamida most like I had one. Numbers are so low. It seems I had it about decade ago.. But it is something else that raising my NK Cells which are fighting my embies and causing m/cs and not implanting.. Next 25 days me and Dh will be on ABs to finish it off the infection. And will take some more different AB if we get lucky with FET in August. There will be lots and lots other drugs to have before FET and on 2WW. My turkish doc is not sure about streoids.. But I am going to have them..

Who knows maybe a magic happens and we get to have our second or third darlings this time..

August 27ish should be FET.. And 7th of September testing day. I am not sure if I will be there or not.. So now again we are going for a long break to Turkey..Which I did not want to do. Next fresh cycle will be somewhere they will give me 3 embies to transfer..Lets see where..

Who knows we might get mega lucky and we have our child and this madness ends for once for all.

Kg, when is the scan.. Will be thinking of you..

Sabah, I am jelous you are doing so well with weight loss.. Well done you I am hoping to lose some over next 25 days with ABs.. 

Daisy, thank you.. hope so one day i will be as happy as you are..

Loo, hope enjoying your hols and if you can just forget txing.. 

Lots and lots of love to you all..
Kukixx


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## KG

Gosh, Kuki, I don't even know what half of that means, but if it helps, then so be it. Here for you, as always.

My scans on Monday, a bit disappointed cause dh can't come due to work and hospital have no alternative date. Fortunately a good friend has said she will come. I am hopeful that all will be well, but will be good to have someone there in case not.

Take care,
Kx


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## Kuki2010

KG,
Yes yes.. Have sb else with you.. It is horrible when doing it own your own.. I hope it is still all well with darling preciuos..
Good luck for monday.
Busy weekend for us. Off to London today to meet a few friends from Spain. Can not wait. Have not seen them for 3 years.. And Tomorrow a family lunch with long distant Aunties from Austrilia.
Have a lovely weekend all.
Love. Kukixxx


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## sanfrancisco

Can I join you ladies,I have posted before but a while ago.

Have just had 3rd ivf which has failed(very lucky ds from 1st cycle)Don't know what went wrong really in this or the last cycle,plenty of embryos,2 fantastic blastocysts(given 60%chance of success)and not even a chemical preganancy!!!Difficult embryo transfer though this and last time so on to on to a hysteroscopy and cervical dilatation now.I am 39 next week so panicking about my age,and it seems that most ladies who are successful for a 2nd time get it on 1st or 2nd ivf attempts.Am I being negative but feeling a little low and as though dream is fading for a sibling for ds.Any advice appreciated xxx


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## sabah m

Hey Sanfranciso- chin up....no, second successes aren't just down to 1st or 2nd attempts, see earlier posts from Daisy-May!  I feel for you, in very similar position, 38 in october!  First successful cycle, two great subsequent ones as far as grading of blasts go then poof....all gone.  They were so sure of success they said to just have one transferred, I insisted on two...Last one was a chemical and miscarriage on the same day, I thought my world had ended.  But, time does heal, however crappy it feels to hear that.     The age statistc is a generalisation (averages) , we all are individuals remember that, it is a combination of factors that makes up our chances, lets work on those in our control, eg weight (issue for me, ha ha!), other health issues, exercise, stress levels and most importantly PMA!!!!!  I have decided for us this is the last time for financial reasons and as DH is 51 and feels he's getting too old to be a new dad.  I guess you will need to decided when is the last time for you, but it doesn't sound like from what you have explained your chances are any less than before, its just that old crappy word "unexplained".  Good luck with whatever you decide, we are here for you!

Kuki-are you happy with the results / advice.  Like KG I don't really understand all of it.  As for the chlamidia, surely you would have had that with Lara too?  what about the other things, can they tell if you always had them or since Lara?  Confusing, but I guess if you feel it inceases chances then go for it!  I am being quite strict with myself re diet-don't want to get to appointment to be told need to delay coz of weight!  I am sure you haven't got to lose as much as me!  I also feel more energetic since starting to make time to walk part way to work too, good for naughty little DS.

KG-very excited about your scan, enjoy every moment xxx

Hello to everyone else,     to daisey and family, hope all is still well and you are getting some rest supermum!!


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## Loopy Loo

Hi ladies 

Just popping in to say whatever the Greek word for goodbye is!! Off in a couple of hours so will be back with you all soon. 

Kuki - like the others I am not too sure about all the immune stuff but I say throw everything at it and you won't be able to regret it later xxxx

KG - good luck for scan xxxx

Sabah - just want to say well down on the weight loss, a few months ago you were sure you would never be able to do it so you should be very proud and as someone who has struggled with weight I know how bloody hard it is xxxx

Hi everyone else - xxx


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## LadyN

Evening ladies, have been lurking for a while & decided to crawl out & log in. Glad i did as currently 8dpo & had to re-read my icsi diary for some 2ww symptoms....although its only been 14months since my ds was born i seem to be back in the "am i or arent i" frame of mind!

Just poa 10mui pregtest that i bought on ebay & got a bfn! grrr.... surely i should know its too early! 
Sorry for the hello and me me me post much love xx


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## KG

Just a quickie to say all was well today, so just waiting on blood test results. Thanks for your good wishes as always, ladies.

Kx


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## Kuki2010

Good morning my dears,

After mega busy and lovely weekend I am here to catch up with you all.

KG, wonderful it went all well. So glad. What is the blood test for? Was this Nuchal scan?

Sabah, Yes Hidden C should have been there with Lara. Dr. Gorgy explains is you body reacts to IVFs and embryoes and your NK Cells goes up. So many different combination of things. And plus the age.. With all our findings it certainly explains why embryoes not attaching or not able to implant. and why I am having m/cs..
I am so impressed with you weight loss and contenment.. Weldone you.. You are doing it.. I am sure FET will be just great next time.. 

Sanfrancisco, I am on my 7th tx. First one was my precious daughter. and the rest. 2/mcs and BFNs. Don't think about age.. Just stay healthy and fit.. And specially emotionally which is very hard.. Got to stay positve and relax for miracle to happen..

Lady N, hope you will get your BFP in next few days.

Loo, hope you are having a great hols..

I have booked my hysteroscopy with my doc in Istanbul. I am scared about it but he is going to make me sleep so It should not hurt during the operation.
We have 25 days of ABs to take for Hidden C. apperantly some of the ABs actually helps for implantaion. So I will be taking them on and off around ET.. 
Going to have Intralipids before FET in Istanbul. Will have to buy it in there and get a nurse to put it into drips for me..
Paternal LIT is basicly in simple terms they take DH's blood. Take off the red cells. Leaves white cells and given to me as shots(injections) so my body does not reject our embryoes. My doc in Istanbul he does not like it. But he says if you wish you can do it. Unfortunately in London Dr. Gorgy is all booked. So I can not get them done this time around. We are on the waiting list to see if we get lukcy. One injection costing 750+270 for tests. So bloody expensive.
For my NK Cells I will take Prednisolone type of streiods. These are cheap.. My doc in Istanbul does not liek htis but he is okay with it.
For m/cs I need to take Cexane. Doc in Ist says this is fine..
For extra projestron Gestone. My doc says I dont' really need this..
So there you go.. I shall try all these and see if we will get lucky this time..

If all does not work. I will be going to Czech for fresh cycle over the winter. I don't realy want to think about this but could not operate without plans..

Next and most important one is to relax my body and brain.. Yoga yesterday was great.. Did an activity relaxation. Wonderful thing.. Wish I was able to do that every day but no disipline as such really.. 

Loving the heat.. Tomorrow Lara's nursery going to park. I will be their little helper.. I am so looking forward to it.. Sad sin't.. but I shall enjoy and see how lara does with all her friends..  Will beinteresting..

Love to you all..

Kukixx


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## sabah m

Why hysteroscopy Kuki?


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## Kuki2010

Hi Sabah,
I had 5 tx since Lara. I had 2 m/cs. Docs thinks in theis case they both agree. Turkish and Dr. Gorgy that hysteroscopy will help with next treatment. To check if there are any scar tissues or more polyps etc..
It seems hysteroscopy helps with implantation. I am getting it done in Istanbul. And my doc will do it in somewhere else not in the hospital where Inormaly have my treatment. It is going to be a lot cheaper. Dr. Gorgy and American hosptial wanted 3k for it. If need be doc will get rid of the first layer. Which should help with implantation. 
Weird enough I looked up all the ladies did hysto.. It seems first treatment after it generally BFN but after that they actually get lucky.. 
Let see what happens..
Hope it is all well wiht you three..
Kukixx


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## LadyN

Thanks Kuki - im terrified to test. Got a BFN yest but i know its way too early.
  no more hpt's till thursday if i cant keep myself busy tomorrow i'll be fine 
Hope everyone is well x


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## sabah m

OMG I had one before first tx as I had a polyp!!! Hadn't realised this was what it was!!  It was on NHS though....I will ask consultant when I have my first appointment.


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## Kuki2010

LadyN,
Oh it is still ealry.. Hanign in there.. Will bethinking of you..

Sabah,
it seems people have hysto all for different reasons or shall we say people have hysto and find out thing are wrong all different.. God awful english but hope you get hwat I am tyring to say..

I am going to  try all this time to see if it is going to make any difference at all.. 

My GP and Turkish Doc says the same thing. You need to try as many as times so you can eventually get pregnant to a healthy baby.. Maybe that's what needs to be done but I don't think I have that much guts for it.. Well forget it we just don't have the money anyway.. Dh is working day and night to buy us these cycles anwway.. And I am getting to my limit point.. So tired and fed up with it all..

Kukixx


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## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,

What a gorgeous day..

Will do my cleaning and than enjoy sunshine over the afternoon.

Last night a friend of mine looked into coffee.. Coffee reading. And apperantly this treatment is going to work and I am going to ahve tiny little boy.. 

I feel like I am getting closer to my 2nd preciuos every day..

Hope you are enjoying your weekend..

Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Hello Ladies !!

I am back fom lovely holiday which was just what I needed - had lots of time to sort myself out and feel like a new person for the time being at least! AF came whilst on holiday (typical) an for once I wasn't howling and sobbing so hopefully like when we were trying to have DD I have turned a corner and the only way is up. So back on the clomid and injectiables and see what this month brings ....

Kuki - sounds like you have a lot going on, wishing and praying that all this hard work is goingto bring you your second bundle of joy xxx

Sabah - any dates for when you are starting tx again? 

KG - glad scan all went well hope you can start to enjoy your pregnancy a little bit now xx

Hello everyone else lurking x

Off to Take That tonight cannot wait have loved them since way back in the beginning when I was only 13!

Lou
Xx


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## KG

Loopy, enjoy! I went to TT last night. I'm not a huge fan, dh bought the tickets for my Xmas pressie, mainly I think cause he wanted to go, but it was a fantastic show! Also saw Pulp in Hyde Park the day before - brilliant too.

Kx


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## sabah m

KG and Loo....I hate you both!!!  It was my birthday on 29th oct when TT tickets went on sale and I was in scotland for a holiday so missed out on trying to buy them and have not been able to get any since!! When DS was 7 weeks old I dumped him on my sister and went to see TT!!!!

Loo...Its great that you're feeling in a better place.    I am very pleased to say tx starts soon!!!! Got appt with fertility nurse friday initially then seeing consultant some time after that.  We decided last night to get a move on with this, although still a few pounds to lose.  Walked to work and back 6 miles yesterday, drove to friends house and walked in 2 miles today, so feel on track.  Calf muscles looked pretty hot for once in dress I wore to friends wedding friday!!

Feeling like I have put a lot of things in place to help me cope if it fails this time, but been told by many people need to stop this, and be positive....this one will work!!!  Feeling very very excited today, and accepting that I will be emotinally unstable for the next three months at least, hopefully a lot longer!!!

Lady N....hope you are ok


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## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Wishing you lots of luck darling.. Lets get pregnant this time around..
Kukixx


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## Loopy Loo

Take That were FABULOUS !!!! Was a screaming 14 yr old again ha ha 

Went into DD's new school today for settling in session cannot believe my little baby will be going to school in September - will be a sobbing wreck on the first day. Also went to hospital for scan got 3 big follies and had ovitrelle injection for trigger so all systems go but am just going with it and what will be will be .... My new mantra !

Sabah - fab news on start date and you and Kuki both pregnant by the end of the summer would be so great ! 

Right off to make dinner - oven blew up while we were on holiday so hob based dinners for us this week! 

Lou
X


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## Kuki2010

Loo,
I still can not believe Lara goes to nursery school. I can not wait for Lara to get a place in the school we like. I have found out from a lady who works in the school as teacher's assistant. There 19 sibilings in next year. So only 11 spaces available.. I will try everything for me to get her in.. I know it is going to be a nightmare.. Not looking forward to it I must say.. 
I like the new mantra.. Just relax and hope that will bring the precious..
Would have been wonderful by in sep will be you, KG, me and Sabah pregeres.. Dream...
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Have only just managed to get a minute to write about fridays appointment....they have decided to not to d/r but use gonal f for a while to thicken my lining as I had probs last two times. Not sure what will happen to my eggs though...it was hilarious when nurse reminded me not to have sex during this time for fear of conception....DH has a vasectomy which is the whole reasons we do this sorry tx







Anyway, felt really positive, excited, other drugs weren't too many so felt happy as really was not up for a medicated cycle again. And no one mentionned my weight so I am obviosly not looking fat, yipee!!!

If I get blood tests next week, could start tx when AF shows late in month, 4 weeks tx then thawing my 2 babies to be...suddenly happening very fast!!!









wow to dream there would be multiple pregnancies on this board      

Hi to everyone else !!


----------



## Loopy Loo

Sabah - I am still laughing at what nurse said!!! Did you say anything or just try really hard not to laugh!! 
Right from now on it's positive vibes all the way for this treatment, when Kuki gets hers started we will have so much PMA flowing we won't know what to do!!

xxxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Loo,
You made me laugh.. I am already feeling very positive!! 7 is my lucky number. I left my ex husband when I was 27 in 1997. 7th of jan. I have got into my first choise of uny when I was 17 and found out 7th of july. My DD was born 7th of dec 2007... This is 7th tx.. With counting FETs too.. But have to tell you if this does not work.. I will get to 7th fresh cycle and give it all up after that fails..

Sabah, so so happy for you.. It all looks so good so far.. Go for i tgirl!!! Lets get our babies.. 

Love to you all..

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hello ladies 

I lost you when a new thread was started, have had a quick read back and am sorry there haven't bene more BFP's yet this year.

Daisy Good to see you still have time to pop on can't believe the twins are nearly 3 months old.

Sabah, Kuki and Loopy   and   for you all in the coming months I know it is all so easy to say but it really can happen.

KG how are you getting on? hope all going well you must be over 3 months now.


Will be thinking of you al.

S
x

PS I went to TT  to and they were fab.


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,

I had LIT today. It was so so painful.. I don't know how I am going to do this again in 26th. DH has fainted when they were taking his blood out.. Well he is certainly not looking for 26th either.. 

SP, lovely to hear from you. Glad all going well with life. And specially with bump..

Love and luck to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Hi everyone!

Kuki-what is LIT and why is it needed again....poor DH fainting, imagine if he were taking all the drugs instead of you!!

Ok, angry me post warning!   

I have now lost a stone and a half....pretty good going as first time for IVF even getting this far took much more time.

DH and I are not on good terms...he is a church paster and is out at meetings a lot, which quite often leaves me feeling like a single mum.  If I were a single mum this would be fine, i would have my routine set up and not be pitied by other families wondering where my husband was...again.  Anyway, he also loves acting and is currently involved in a theatre production which is also taking time away from us.  I watched opening night this week.  What really hurt was that he acted the part of a man losing his wife to cancer and aching to have spent more time with her.  This felt like a slap in the face, as we've been fighting about how little time he spends with me like he doesn't need to and its all about my needs.  Its got really blown up to him now saying I am spoilt and controlling and just want things my way like DS, who I forced him into, and now baby 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he says he has given in as he has feared a 3rd marriage failure and that he has had enough of me bullying him.  He has withdrawn consent for IVF pending marriage guidance counselling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sooooooooooooo angry I can't describe it.  He knows I am 38 in October and success rates reduce etc.  I have my private prescription I was going to order meds online today as day off work.  Had swabs and blood tests this week and was gonna start meds in 2 weeks when AF started.  I hate him so much for this, his only way of regaining some control.  It will take months to get counselling sorted and even then we literally have no spare cash to finance it, which again he blames on me.  He loves DS, there is no doubt about it, but still holds onto being forced into it.  At the time I said I didn't know if I could stay with him if he did not agree and if it had not worked first time we would stop.  When we discussed a sibling he was fine about it!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
I am so very sorry.. What a nightmare. DH has been so unfair.. Very very naughty for him to do this right now while you are so ready to do it. And put all that effort.. Talk to him.. You can change his mind..
IVF is hard work.. So so stressful. It is normal to be fighting etc.. I have learnt that.. Give time to him. He will see the light.. What concent he has to give? Do clinic call him or email will do? 

I am a lot older than my DH. And I made sure he wants kids before we got together. After our fight to have Lara. I know and he said he is will happly settle down with just one child as he so had enough with all the money spending on IVF and most annoying he find the heartache and life in a stop while we are tring to have children very difficult to deal with.. But I have made it so clear to him. If he does not want to have more kids I am prepare to carry on without him. Which I am. And I expressed it so many times that we will stop IVF when I am ready to stop not cos he wants me too. Dh is my other half.. Truely.. And I have done with marriages now as he is my second husband. If he did not behave like he does. I would have left him.. And go alone to have more children. 

Life is not easy. But last time I went to see my GP. He said to me to be careful. He said he has 3 paintents who are going through divorce cos of IVF stress etc.. The presure is huge. And abivously your DH is happy with his work and life.. And he is content without more kids.. We understand that but he has to understand how much you want and how important it is for you.. For you for now and for your future..

Darling what can I say.. Very difficult.. Wish you were closer.. We could have coffee and soem cries over it.. 

LIT is  Lymphocyte Immunization Therapy. They took Tom's blood. Left red cells out. Gave me the white cells by injecting little by little under my skin in 26+ holes.. Burns like hell. It is not easy to explain but it is suppose to help with my NK Cells fighing the embryoes implantation. Another factor is when embryo is trying to implant the bits trying to attached to uterus are carries men's DNA. IF you have DQ alpha match depends on the percetage. Between me and Tom we carry 25%match and the other 75% very similiar. Having this treatment helps for my body not to fight the embies. LIT suppose to help with m/cing problems too. All these are not proven yet. So most docs do not believe it. But it works on some ladies.. 

It happens so many people to have immune problems after 1st pregnancy. I had my second iVF and had an awful cold on transfer day. Well it all comes out as cold symptons.. And severe cases like flue and fever symptons.. I thought me being gullabal it was a cold and caused m/c.. But now I know it was not.. It was my body fighthing the embies with full force so they don't implant..

Immune blance is so frigale and very hard to get it right.. There are so many things people are trying but non is proven that it works.. But they do work.. Like steriods etc..

Sabah, I am sure you will get over this problem and have your FET.. Let DH come down a bit and keep on working on him to get into your side.. 

Love. Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Oh god I am having such a horrible day, on CD 22 and feeling so emotional and crying (no make that sobbing) alot so in my heart I know this cycle has not worked and that these are all AF symptoms .... Even with 3 eggs ready to go and trigger injection it still doesn't work .. Am really feeling like I need to start accepting that we are most likely to end up a family of 3 - god this is not what I wanted or planned why is life so bloody hard?? 

Sorry for the me post cannot pull myself together ..

Sabah - sorry for all the **** your DH is putting you through, hope there has been some positive developments xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

How are you feeling today Loo? Hope better than yesterday.. Come on stay positive.. We are going to get there come on..    

Sabah, how are you?    

Love and luck to you all. Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

hi everyone

still gloomy here, after tuesdays meltdown i felt alot better no AF pains or spotting which i usually get so of course i convince myself that i have done it and even started getting a few PG symptoms that i had with DD an then of of nowhere last night AF showed up - am still in bed as i feel yukky and sorry for myself to be honest!!! Anyway i am starting to pull myself together and I promise Kuki that i will start to be positive again xx

Sleepy - meant to say in last post hello and glad you are back I was worrying about you!! x

Sabah - any better on the home front? Men really are idiots sometimes, I came to the realisation that me and DH feel compleatly differently about TTC first time round, it is hard here sometimes because deep down i know that if i said i was fed up and no more tx he would agree without hesitation. He worships the ground DD walks on and i think as like most men he cant see beyond whats in front of him and is happy with his lot so to speak x

hello everyone else, going to read the Sunday papers now which are filled with Amy Winehouse - very sad what a waste ...

lou
xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Lou,
Yes what a waste of talent and life.. Very sad.. Stupid girl...

Yes same as my DH.. If I say that is it.. He will be happies man in the world.. He is doing it so he makes me happy..

Yes lets get positive and stay positive..

SP, lovely to hear from you.. 

Sweetchilli and Jacaba, lots and lots of luck.. 

Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Oh it just gets better!! Been to docs today as keep going dizzy and light headed and now have vertigo !! But can't have any medication because of fertility drugs so just have to put up with it! 

right moan over - how is everyone else ?? xx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies I'm hoping I can join you all and hoping this is the right place to be, a bit of background info I was with my ex for 7yrs and tried for 5 of those for a baby clomid and 7 IUIs with 2 miscarriages, he then left me as couldnt take anymore of the IF tx and heartbreak I suppose, a month after him leaving I recieved a letter to start IVF.
I then met my new partner and fell pg naturally again miscarrying    within a few months I was pregnant again resulting in my gorgeous 2yr old son. We have now decided to try for a sibling for my son naturally, this is the first month and I have to admit how scared i am feeling, not so much about not conceiving but about miscarrying again. When I was pregnant with my DS I had to inject myself every day to thin out my blood. 
i hope I'm in the right place and look forward to getting to know you all
Andie x x


----------



## KG

Hi ladies, I've been reading and not posting as not sure if I should be on this board now, but I don't want to leave completely as I'm waiting to see all you lovely ladies get your bfps!

Kuki, LIT sounds nasty, but worth it if it does the trick. When will you be doing your FET?

Sabah, I hope you and dh have worked things out. It sounds tome as though he knows what to say to get you where it hurts. I hope you've managed to talk things through.

Loopy, sending hugs, sounds like you are having a rotten time.

Hi to the new ladies, this is a lovely supportive thread and I hope you all get your longed-for bfps.

AFM, had a bit of a scare last week, but, fingers crossed all is ok at the mo - happened whilst dh was away in Germany with work, which was not so good. This week he's away again, and ds has got an infectious skin complaint so we have been stuck at home, with no nursery or friends over allowed, not much fun with a v lively boy!

Take care,
Kx


----------



## Tillypops

KG - you are welcome to stay hun. This is one of the threads where I think baby talk is more acceptable than others and I am more lenient with the FF rules!! I think all the other ladies will agree with me.

Tilly
xxxxxxxxx


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## Loopy Loo

Erm KG you aint going nowhere!! Seriously though I agree with Tilly baby talk is accepted here because we all have our miracles but want more and it's lovely to hear about your pregnancy and also you have been there and done it so know all what we are going through xxx

Hello to Colesmammy - looking forward to chatting xx

Hello everyone else - went out with the girls last night and still feel a bit ropey why do hangovers last all day once you go past 30!!!! xx


----------



## miraclex2

Loopy Loo your lucky my hangovers last 2 days    x


----------



## daisy-may

Still reading about you all but no time to post ....


wanted to remind you never to give up .... you will get your 2nd miracles !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Come on PMA all the way !!!!!!!!!!


love and lock, daisy xx


----------



## LadyN

Morning ladies... been lurking for a few days now so heres a short intro.... have had a short break from FF and decided to TTC2 naturally from now till christmas then will opt for private icsi(used all out attempts on NHS having DS who is now 15months).  
Have tracked my last 3 AF's and decided to try conceive plus lube and a moon cup! 
Has anyone else tried this? DTD lastnight with some lube (sorry if TMI) & then after BD put the moon cup in straight away. Fingers & toes crossed. OV starts today so fingers crossed xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hello everyone

Just a quickie from me had my follicle scan this morning and have 2 on left ovary 22 and 25 mm and one on right at 15, womb lining looked ok so had trigger jab and it's off we go again!! 
Had to laugh at the multiple pregnancy talk they gave me again - I said at this point I don't care!! 

Daisy - nice to "see" you hope babies are ok and Dex xxx

Lady N - good luck, we are using that lube too never heard of a moon cup though what is it?? xx

Lou
xxx


----------



## LadyN

Lou it's a menstral fluid cup used instead of a tampon during af but I've read online that people are using them to hold sperm inside the vagina after the have dtd so I'm giving it ago along with lube. I got it from boots, size A for "after birth" lol or size b for before birth. It was £20 - worth a try I guess x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Ha ha - before and after birth sizes!! God knows what I'd need DD was 9lb 8 with forceps so maybe I need super size!!! 

xxx


----------



## LadyN

Lmao! I had forcepts too! & can assure you I'd prob fit 2 a cups up the tunnel of love! x


----------



## miraclex2

Lady N Ohhh this moon cup sounds interesting might give it a try   

Loopy Loo I wouldnt care about the multiples either    for u x x x

Hi Daisy how are u Dex and the twins? Long time no speak x x x x
I got AF on saturday 28 days exactly, before I had ds my cycle was all over so I'm    it has settled down so its easier to work out ovulation I want to be quite relaxed this time and give it maybe 6 months before starting to use ovulation sticks. 

Big hello to everyone else hope your all well x x


----------



## LadyN

Morning ladies, I'm now 3 or poss 4 dpo. So in the 2ww or 2yr wait is what it feels like!! Anyway... I used an ov stick this morn just to be sure and it was negative but I have low down twinges and dull back ache. I read that ov sticks can be used to show early pregnancy so with the test showing negative am I out already? Slightly confused now!

Coles mammy - I agree with you in trying to be relaxed this time around. Me & DH were of the same thoughts & now DS is 16 months we have given ourselves till December this year to get pregnant then we are giving up. It's with me every month ( the desire to get a bfp). I need to stop being a crazy woman. I swear my head stone when I'm dead will be sponsored by clearblue I've peed on that many of their sticks! So after Christmas I'm going to give up & stop tracking ov & stop spending money on ttc and save for Florida xx

Babydust to everyone xx


----------



## miraclex2

LadyN I'm trying to kid myself that I'm going to be relaxed this time..I have already bought 10 pregnancy tests and even though my AF wasnt due until Saturday I couldnt resist peeing on a stick on Friday   my dp says were not "trying" for a baby were just seeing what happens, I dont think he wants to put added pressure onto me. By the end of this month I probably will have drove myself crazyyyyyyy lol x


----------



## LadyN

By the end of my 2ww i'll have put on 2stone. All ive done all day is eat garbage! Ive ate cakes, a mcdonalds, then a chocolate bar etc! Im feeling peckish and have had the odd niggles mainly to the right side in the ovary region. Maybe its a sign? My head is fuzzy and i wish i was more than 3 or 4 dpo.

Coles mammy - im a poas addict too! Cant wait to pee on one. Got another 8 or 9 days to go before i cave in x


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## Loopy Loo

Morning all

Colesmammy & Lady N - I am so the opposite of you i have a irrashional fear of POAS!! Think its all the negatives i have had, When I was late when I was expecting DD i waited 4 days to test!!!
do agree on the eating though, i brought these mini chicken kiev bites in tescos on monday and cannot open the frodge without stufffing one in my gob! Oh and dont get me started on McDonalds its my guity pleasure and i could happily eat it all day every day!

Well had a follow up with cons at hospital yesterday and I have to take a 3 month break then i can have another 6 cycles of clomid and trigger jabs, that will then be that with the NHS as we cannot get funding for IUI or IVF because of DD which I did know about when we were first referred. So my plan is to finish this month have my break which will be good as DD is starting school in September then carry on as we are for 6 more months after that, will still TTC naturally on my break and will use OPK's to keep a check on my ovulation. Me and DH had talk last night and decided that if we still havent conceived after the 2nd lot of clomid cycles we wont be doing IUI or IVF as we dont have the money and to be honest dont think I could take it, although if in a couple of years we have fallen into a pit of money we will think again!!

Lady N - i am with you on the Florida thing - LOVE disneyworld. We will definatly be going again if nothing happens!!

Hello to everyone else - Kuki,Sleepy,KG,Sabah and Daisy - hope you are all ok.... xxx


----------



## LadyN

Loopy - thats good that you have a short break and then get back into it again.  Like you with having had tx and having ds we are on our own with funding anymore tx & dont have the funds to do so at the mo. If i had the money in the bank id be hesitant in shelling it out as it took FET for us to have DS so thats more money i guess.  
Im now 4dpo and havent a symptom in sight  no cm no sore boobs nothing!    think im out already this month!
Woke up with a sore throat this morning and its such a gloom grey day ive had two cups of tea, a toasted muffin and 3 biscuits already! Can see me looking 9months prego by the end of the day. If only...   
Im my own worst enemy & i hate ttc, i really do. I was sitting crying lastnight looking at pics of ds when he was born and just felt id never ever be able to have another baby.... negative i know but it was like D Day and a strong gut feeling that i was kidding myself on during this 2ww.
xx


----------



## miraclex2

LadyN I totally sympathise with how u feel I have days like that, where I think its never going to happen and maybe I should be happy with what god has blessed me with then the maternal instinct takes over and I crave another baby so badly..with me its not the falling pregnant that worries me its mc again...when I fell pregnant with ds I had to inject into my tummy every day and use cyclogest until I was 13 weeks.  I lived in fear everyday of loosing him, I'm not looking forward to that again but I suppose its what I have to go through if I want to have another child x

Hi to everyone else I will catch up properly with personals tonight as I'm just about to take Cole to a play area with friends x


----------



## KG

Hi ladies, just checking in to wish all the 2ww-ers loads of luck.

Loopy, I think it's good to have a plan. We knew how many IUI cycles we would do this time before we called it a day. You are still young, hun, so you still have time on your side if you change your mind, or win the lottery, in a couple of years.

Daisy, hope you and your 3 are doing well.

Kuki and Sabah, haven't heard from yo two for a bit - hope all is ok?

Kx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Afternoon Ladies 

Had trigger jab on Friday which should mean I am 5/6 DPO I have had a few moments of painful boobs odd bit of back ache and quite a lot of twinges in my sides but not a lot of CM so bugger only knows!!! 
Really trying not to symptom spot ha ha! 

Weather pants here today so am staying in - DD being very well behaved this week as opposed to last week when she was a beast! Took her to see Mr Poppers penguins yesterday which we both enjoyed (penguins are so cute!) 

KG - thanks for kind words xx
How's everyone else?


----------



## LadyN

Loopy we're around the same in this cycle im 6 or 7 dpo   
I think im out this month though, im loaded with a head cold and a viral throat infection.  Have had a few twinges on off down there, trying to remain positive but ive spent the last 12 hours in bed with hot / cold sweats and have had a cocktail or meds to try and make me feel better so i can run about after ds. Feel like ive hardly seen him. Yesterday he was in nursery till 1pm then my aunt came to collect him as we had builders in and then i became really ill, dizzy, swollen glands etc and had to go lie down then DH went to collect him and id fallen asleep.  By the time i woke up he had gone to bed 
Hes away to nursery this morning and so i cant wait to collect him at 1pm. Need a big hug from him, feeling sorry for myself  
Daisy - i read your diary when you were pg with DS, cant beleive you have twins now too. How are you and the gang doing?
KG - how are you? no more scares i hope you are well
Coles Mammy - hope you are good hun xx


----------



## miraclex2

Lady N I'm doing great but not on the dreaded 2ww yet I will be    when I am lol. Sorry to hear you have caught a nasty virus    but good luck for this cycle any way hun     x

Loopy its to hard not to symptom spot isnt it    praying for you that you get your bfp this cycle    

I'm resisting the urge to go but opks i have promised dp I wont for at least 3 months, he wants us to stay relaxed about ttc no2, I did put into a fertility predictor on the net the date of my last period, so from Wednesday of next week we will be dtd lol

Big hello to everyone else hope your all well x


----------



## LadyN

Ladies can i have some advice. Whats your thoughts on this hpt? Its a boots 50miu and im now 8dpo. The result came up like this within 5mins of peeing 
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/gallery/displayimage.php?album=lastup&cat=6&pid=15102#top_display_media
xx  xx


----------



## miraclex2

It does look like a BFP to me MrsN have you not got any other tests in the house to use and compare? I am    it is for u      x x


----------



## LadyN

Coles mammy - my heart is palpitating like you would never believe!!
It's a two pack but terrified to do another 
DH is in shock - he says he won't believe it till the dr says so! 
Might need to get up extra early in the morn n pee on the 2nd test in the pack!! it's a boots 50miu & I'm only 8dpo so I am in severe doubt xx


----------



## miraclex2

Are you on any fertility meds? You cant get a false positive if your not I would be tempted to run out and buy a clear blue or first response    but thats just me and my crazy mind lol. xx


----------



## LadyN

Not on anything @ all. My brain is frying! What if I do another & it's negative :O then my 5mins or glory will be gone  xx


----------



## miraclex2

I know your head will be all over, wait till in the morning and do it but i'm sure the result will be the same I'm certain you cant get a false positive      for you x x


----------



## LadyN

How long does it take for an evap to come up & would that look similar? 
I've taken nurofen twice today, pray to god if it is a bfp that my little beanie is ok xxx
Omg I'll not sleep tonight xx


----------



## miraclex2

I think most tests say not to read after 10 mins... but not 100% sure. The ones i have in cupboard say that I have just checked,I still have rthe first response test that i got a bfp with with C and its still positive 3yrs later   ...I'm sure 2 nurofen wont hurt your little bean x x


----------



## LadyN

Same here! I still have the test I had with baby C & it's old pink faded but still a bfp! Pray to god this is it for me I'm scared xxx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Lady N - think this maybe the only test in the world I have not used ! What's the lines mean? Is it a positive line?  Sorry I sound so thick - very excited so hurry up and reply!!

Lou
x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Right you two have  been gassing whilst I posted !! I agree with Colesmammy - If you are on no meds I am sure it would be strange to get a false positive !  Go out to the nearest supermarket and get another !! 
Very happy for you Lady N - although you now have me thinking about early testing as we are cycling the same!! 

Lou
X


----------



## miraclex2

for 2 BFPs of you girls in the next few days...what a boost to the thread it would be...I'm now getting excited to be on the 2ww even though I wont be ov until middle of next week. So this evening I have enojoyed a few glasses of wine as we have our niece and nephew staying over so dp is playing xbox with dn    lol x x x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Hi ladies hope your all well. I'm on 3dpo today and feeling abit strange. 

Ladyn. Go and get a clear blue digital one  xx


----------



## LadyN

Ladies sorry, was on cloud 9 there. Looks like the more the test has dried out the more prominent the vertical line has become so i think its a very very faint bfp.  Havent done another one as dont want to jonx but will do another in the morning and see what comes of that. 
Loopy its a boots test - not an early one just a 50miu one.  Im pretty sure im 9dpo & i first bd'd on thursday the 4th Aug so i must be exta early which is what is freaking me right out!
Sweetcheeks would a digital be a good idea? Read on a few posts that they give negatives this early on?  

Dont have many symtoms, teeth feel like they are see through and now any again my under arms feel a bit tender. Head very fuzzy but then i have a throat infection at the mo. 
xxx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Ah thanks Colesmammy - I am getting very anxious keep going from being positive to really negative in a matter of minutes! Would be lovely to have a couple or more BFPs to get this thread glowing! xx

Lady N - deep breath (that's all of us!) do another test in the morning and try to get some sleep - stand by the fact that false positives are rarer than false negs. Am logging on first thing to see what's going on! Hope it's another positive - keeps us all believing xxxx
Hi Sweetcheeks - I recognise you from the clomid board hope u are ok x


----------



## LadyN

Ladies the test has dried up and this is what it looks like now.
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/gallery/displayimage.php?album=6&pid=15103#top_display_media
My old hpt with my DS looks like this and that is now almost 2 yrs old!
OMG on this very date 2 years ago approx i was having my FET! OMG scary stuff! xx

Loopy yip lets keep positive - we can do this! 
Hugs to you all, really feel you have kept me sane this evening. Let me know your thoughts on the new link above xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
So happy to see more BFPs... Good luck!!!
I have AF came early and feeling very positive. Will keep doing my drugs from now.. There is rather a lot of them..
I should be PUPO at the end of August.. Hope to catch with your pregnancies.. Got to keep it positive.. 
KG, how are you? and bump?
Lots of love to you all. 
Kukixx


----------



## LadyN

Ladies i done another test this morn at 5.30 and it was a bfn. I dont know what to think now?
Why would i have a faint bfp @ 5pm and then a BFN 12hours later with the same test? Has anyone ever heard of this? xxx


----------



## sarahc

Hi ladies

LadyN not suer hunny, still maybe a bit early? Wait a few days, hard though I know 

I am back on clomid, and about to ovulate, we bd fri and will again tonight and tuesday, so fingers crossed!!!

Don't post much but will try harder, fingers crossed you get a BFP Lady N xxxxx


----------



## LadyN

Thanx Sarah <3
enjoy your bd'ing  x


----------



## miraclex2

LadyN i dont understand at all, but like sarah said wait a few more days and retest      xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Lady N - bloody hell why does it have to be so hard? Have no idea why it would do that, I would wait a few more days and test again like the others have said. Big hugs sweetheart xxx

Kuki- how's turkey? Glad you are all on track for FET, good luck with all the drugs hoping this is what you need to get that BFP. xxx

AFM - have no symptoms whatsoever so just going to try and cruise through this week without thinking too much (ha ha) and see what next weekend brings which is when AF is due. 
Had a lovely meal out last night with DH and DD and if it's just going to be the 3 of us for the foreseeable future I'm happy with that xxx


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Ladyn. So sorry hunni. Maybe try testing again in a few days? xx  

Sarahc. Are you on the clomid thread? xx


----------



## LadyN

Haven't tested again, I was in boots buying stuff for DS & dodged the pee stick section. 
I duno what to make of it, such a charade x


----------



## sarahc

Hi sweetcheeks 


no I'm not on the clomid thread, feel I don't 'belong' there because I already have two xxxx


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Sarah. You would be welcome on there Hun. I'm on there and I already have a DD. Their are a few with DC on there.  You should come along  xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Morning ladies xx

just popping by to see if there is any more news Lady N? Being checkin your diary and just wanted to send lots of love your way it's not fair all this confusion xx

Well off to a picnic with DD and some of her old Pre school friends - will be taking cardi though as it's a bit chilly!! 
CD 24 for me and AF due over weekend, have had some cramping over weekend and have been really irritable and emotional last 2 days so not holding out much hope. On a 3 month break after this one and to tell you the truth am looking forward to it a bit xx

Hope everyone else is ok xx


----------



## sabah m

Mrs N- hope you have got that BFP sorted by now, how frustrating!

Hello to evryone else, been off for while....few problems at home, getting sorted with couples therapy, which meant i did not go ahead with FET cycles as planned this month.  I am not sure what DH wants, we want to stay together but he's shaky about no. 2 (as hadn't wanted no. 1).  My sister announced she's pregnant with no. 2 on friday....it was hard but really pleased for her as she's waited almost 3 years and was about to start IUI cycle!  Will see how therapy goes then might be back on this thread....but keeping an eye on you ladies, as still want to see BFPs for you all xxx     

Kuki-glad you're all set


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah I wondered where you were   , my DH would have been just as happy without kids but his view changed once DS came along. I guess the added complication of treatment just makes it all tougher. I realy hope things work out for the best. Bittersweet news about your sister just shows yet again never give up hope.

Loopy   this is the one for you otherwise I hope 3 months off the merry go round lets you have some normality.


Hi Sweetcheeks, Cloes Mammy and Sarah.

Lady N any news? I was so lucky as didn't have to go through all this as didn't think I could get pg so didn't find out until I was 7 weeks when throwing up (thought I had a tummy bug   ) I guess thats the difficulty of testing early but so hard to restist.   for positive news for you.

Kuki All the luck in the world sweetie this is your time      

How you doing Daisy?

Positive thoughts all round xxxx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies hope everyone is well, just popping on to see if theres any news on MrsN?

I am so tired today have had my niece and nephew for the day as SILs dad has been taken into hospital he has cancer so she needs to be with him and my bro was at work...will try and get back on later for personals x x x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Coles sorry to hear about your sil dad x


----------



## LadyN

Hey Coles mammy - haven't tested today! Trying to hold off till thurs/fri. Got symptoms on/off!
Hope your well hun & every1 too xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Thanks sweetcheeks x x x

Hey MrsN I was wondering where you were    hopefully by Thurs/Fri you will get a definate bfp   

I hopefully should be ovulating in the next few days so by Saturday will be on 2ww and driving myself    I am really gonna try not to test until the day AF is due which will be 3rd Sep    x x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Coles mammy. I am making myself mad during my 2ww lol. It's horrible and just while your down you get kicked on the tummy by a bfn  I really hope we both get a bfp this cycle. I'm 6dpo today. Hope you ovulate very soon xxx


----------



## Pascha

Hi guys, 
I haven't been on here since I was TTC my first daughter and just don't have the time anymore - lol 
I'm 10 dpo with 2nd FET and not really very confident about frozen, so planning a fresh for September already....


Anyone had any joy with an FET before? 


Crossing my fingers for you guys on the TWW too! 
I'm told we have more chance since it's worked before, but we're none of us getting any younger, eh? 
All my NCT class seems to be on their second, but just trying to be thankful for our not-so-little miracle!! 


Lots of love & baby dust to you all...
Pascha
xxx


----------



## KG

Sabah, sending you    I have been thinking about you. Hope you and dh can sort things out. 


Kuki, keeping everything crossed that this time will be your turn. All ok here at the mo, 20wk scan on Friday. 


MrsN,    to 2ww. Hope you get good news when you retest. 


Loopy, fingers crossed that you won't need that 3 months off, and this is your time too. 


Kx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Morning 

Sabah - hoping things are slowly getting sorted, sometimes things just come out of nowhere and blow you out of the water - i think to a certain extent all men feel pretty much the same, i have said before if I said no more TTC my DH would be fine about it they just dont get it! Sending you a lot of love and strength for the coming weeks. Let us know how things are going xx

Sleepy - not long now!!  hope you are doing ok, any leanings towards pink or blue? xx

Colesmammy,Lady N & Sweetcheeks - Hello, am coming to end of my 2ww and its not been that bad but i always find the last couple of days pure torture!!! xx

Pascha - Hello and welcome, hope the FET works and you dont need that back up plan but if you are like me a plan in place makes everything more bearable xx

KG - 20 weeks!! are you finding out flavour or having a surprise? thanks for good wishes I hope its our turn but have woke up to dragging pains this morning (cd26) so not holdng out much hope also have face full of spots... Still going to have accupunture during my 3 month break so who knows xx

lou
xx


----------



## miraclex2

I had a very long converstaion with dp on sunday night, we have decided that we will try for 6 months naturally and if that doesnt work then I will hopefully try clomid again for 6 months if I havnt fell pregnant in that time were not going to take it any further ie IUI or IVF. He has said he has a perfect life with me and ds and having another child would be a dream come true but he doesnt want pressure of tx to come between us. So now I'm    mother nature is kind to us once again and we are blessed with another natural miracle      

Hope everyone is well this morning x x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Coles mammy. Thats what were doing but we are at the clomid stage. I'm not in work today cuz as I turned to snooze my alarm I felt so dizzy and light headed and it happened again the next time it went off. I went to the bathroom and I felt so giddy. I was that light headed it was making me feel sick. It's like someone has spun me around a thousand times! Everytime I turn my head left or right or try to stand up I feel dizzy  so I'm just gonna stay on sofa. Do you think this is a sign or do you think I've probably come down with something? It seems to bad for a side effect of pregnancy xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Sweetcheeks Have u looked up side affects of clomid its so long ago since I took it I cant remember what I was like on it. When I was preg with ds I used to get very dizzy and a few times I did pass out but I think this started when I was about 9/10 weeks. Good luck for a bfp when are you due to test? x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Coles mammy. No I haven't. Think I'm going to find the thread and re look at the symptoms. Thanks  I'm due to test a week tomorrow that will be 15dpo. Could I test earlier than that? xxxx


----------



## LadyN

Sweetcheeks    hope your dizziness has calmed down    you have a bfp soon!!
Ladies my boobs are felling fulle and firmer, scared to test tomorrow    keep looking and the faint bfp and then thinking why did i get 2 bfn after it? argh - life is so cruel! trying to chill tonight so have a glass of red in my hand    i could be facing another bfn tomorrow so i see the bottle of gin coming out.
Does anyone else react to bfn's and binge drink? its something im guilty of    i dont smoke and seldom have a night out due to severe lack of babysitters so i enjoy a glass or 2 at home but when the bfn's come out so does the gallon on gin    xx


----------



## Pascha

Hi guys!


@ColesMammy - that's so lovely - I know what you mean. My DH says we'll only do one more fresh cycle as he's happy with DD. I'm not sure I'll be able to let go so easily, so we'll see. Soo many people say that they know people who fall pregnant naturally after treatment. Unfortunately not us :-(  But sounds like you will get there - fingers crossed!!


I have sore boobs, itchy skin and flatulence, but they are all just cyclogest side effects... On my successful cycle, I had had AF pains for 3 days, so thinking it's not been successful, but i suppose it's always different - anyone know? 


Hi Loopyloo, thanks for the welcome! Good luck - are you trying naturally? 


Sweetcheeks, good luck waiting! Dizzyness sounds like a symptom to me 


Anyway, gotta lie down before all the cycogest leaks out!!


Lots of love everyone!
Pascha


----------



## miraclex2

Lady N any news huni? x x        

Pascha I will probably be the same when the time comes I wont want to give up    I suppose we will cross that bridge when we come to it, ohhhh the ji=oys of cyclogest I remember it well lol x x    for a bfp for you x x 

Sweetcheeks how are you feeling today? x x

Big hello to everyone else x x x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hello ladies

Pascha - I am on my 6th cycle of clomid and trigger jabs if this one is a no go I have to have a 3 month break of drugs to rest my ovaries then I have another 6 months worth of clomid with jabs then after that we will have to fund ourselves if we want IUI or IVF but I think we will call it a day on tx after the second lot of clomid. We conceived DD on clomid back in 2006 so it does work for me but who knows if it will again??!!
I remember the dreaded cyclogest from when I was pg with DD the wind was awful!!!

Well Off to sainsburys to get a bit of shopping weather awful here - is it summer ??!!

Hi to everyone else - hope we are all doing ok we could do with a bit of good news on this thread xx
Hoping it's going to come from Lady N today xxxx
Lou
xx


----------



## miraclex2

Loopy loo    this is your month hun      x


----------



## LadyN

Ladies I still haven't tested... Trying to hang off till tomorrow. I feel 50/50 - I think my boobs are veiny & I'm unsure if they hurt or feel heavy? The mind boggles! 
Tomorrow I'll be 14 or 15 dpo so I guess the jury will be out eekk! 
Pray it's bfp & blow me some bubbles ladies I sure need'em xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Have blew you some bubbles LadyN and am    you get your bfp x x x


----------



## KG

Good luck, LadyN.
Kx


----------



## LadyN

Morning ladies..... Havent tested yet, totally petrified to do so! 
Wiped this morning and got pink staining. That is never the case before AF. She usually hits me with a ruby red wave and wooossshhhhh she's here! lol sorry if tmi, trying to make light of what could be a horrendous end to a positive happy wee cycle.
Im very sure i have veiny boobs and some extra dots on my nipples too.  BUT.... i have a crampy feeling going on down below to the right side. Not heavy but more twangy and for that reason im holding off testing for now!
The sun is out here in sunny glasgow today, hope everyone has a fab friday feeling - i seem to be a bit ecentric this morning? lol x
               to the good lord above that the witch doesnt show her ugly face         x


----------



## miraclex2

LadyN everything crossed for a bfp for you, when are you thinking of poas?


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Ladyn. Good luck xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi sweetcheeks how are u this morning? Still feeling dizzy? x x x


----------



## LadyN

just poas and BFN!!  no more pee sticks this month for me. x


----------



## miraclex2

Big big    to you LadyN...sorry about that huni I really thought it would be bfp for you...pm me if you need to chat x x x x x x x x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Lady N - big hug hunny and sorry for your BFN, you really have been through the mill this month. Maybe your BFP at the weekend was the start of something that for some reason didnt continue. Hope I havent upset you by saying that I am jut one of those people who try to make sense of everything (it can be very annoying being in my head lol!).
make sure ou treat yourself to something nice today and take care of yourself xx

Hope everyone else is ok this morning xx


----------



## miraclex2

Well ladies I did the ovulation predictor on the net which said I was most fertile yesterday but unfortunatly we only had bms sex on Wednesday due to dps stupid shift pattern and having a toddler running around   ...he finishes at 8pm this evening I'm gonna grab him as soon as he walks thorugh the door (sorry tmi)    so I suppose my 2ww starts now   , but not holding out much hope, I pray that tonight does the trick though x

Hi loopy Loo how are you x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi ladies,
KG, glad 20week scan went well. Do you know the sex? Did you want it to know? How are you feeling? any harder this time around?

LadyN, I am so very sorry.. I hope you are feeling a bit lighter today. I know how hard these BFN can be.. Hell.. Thinking of you.
Lots of hugs..

Hello to rest of the ladies.. Lots of luck..

Sabah, how are you darling? Hope a bit better?

Love. Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Lady N Don't give up

Kuki hope things are progressing as planned and you are enjoying being away it is pee'ing it down here today.

 to all

x


----------



## Kuki2010

Sp, 
Lovely to hear from you. 3 more weeks and you will meet your 2nd darling.. So exciting.. you are ready? Do you know what it is?
Going steadyly and surely in here.. Can not wait to get to Transfer date. And than enjoy being PUPO for the last time I hope..
Love. mxx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hi Kuki 

We are having a 'surprise' in all senses of the word, complete oposite pregnancy to DS which would indicate a girl but who knows, just so lucky to be here. Moving DS to new room this week then can get nursery sorted, weird feeling that it could be any time now up to another 7 weeks depending on its time keeping   (if it's like its Daddy it will be here at xmas   )

Will keep checking in to see how you are doing have you got a transfer date yet can't remember.

x


----------



## Princessem

Hi all

Im a newbie to this thread. Hoping its the right one to post on   

I have a son (Harry) by IVF who is 8 months old. we are trying FET in the new year. we only have one embie left, but going to risk it, before (hopefully not) trying IVF again.

I am struggling at the moment. I have a big jealousy thing for women who can easily fall pregnant. before Harry, i could avoid them, but now with baby groups, im constantly faced with broody/pregnant women. i know i have to get over it for harrys sake, but it is difficult.

any advice would be gratefully recieved.

looking forward to getting to know you all.

emma


----------



## Loopy Loo

hi girls

well i think its all over for me - starting spotting this afternoon and just waiting for full flow AF. yet again I had really started to think that it was "our" month... Every month seems to be getting harder and its without a doubt harder this time around than trying to have DD which seems crazy but its like I know what I am missing out on and of course the whole not wanting DD to be an only child... Well 3 months off of the medication and hormones which  I could do with to be honest.   

Enough moaning time to be grateful for what I have got!

Sleepy -glad you and bump are ok x
Kuki - Got everything crossed for sweetheart you deserve that BFP x

Princessem - Hello, look forward to chatting to you. Can completly relate to how you feel my DD is 4 and starting school and I get the questions about having more almost daily and yes I too feel envious of other women who get pregnant at the flick of a switch but just tell myself that I dont know thier background and could also have issues that are just as bad as IF. Sorry not much use on the advice at the moment i'll be better in a few days    x

Lou
x


----------



## sarahc

Hi everyone just a quickie, am 6dpo today and having progesterone checked tomorrow. 

Feel a bit off colour with sicky feeling, headaches and sore boobs so reckon my clomid is def working.

Love to everyone, computer playing up so will reply to everyone later xxxx


----------



## sabah m

Loo and Lady N-so sorry to hear about your disappointments, nothing prepares you does it, despite knowign the odds we can't help but hope, take care of yourselves and hope plans you have made to rest rejuvenate your bodies and minds to the places they need to be    

Sarah-    for you not to have to wait and for the drugs to be doing as they should!!

Sleepy-wow time flies, I remember your announcement!!  Hope moving DD goes ok, is she excited about the baby?

emma-welcome, I think we have all experienced the envy you are talking of, its normal!!  Don't feel bad about it, I don't! Ha! Hope plans for FET go to plan!!

KG how are you?

Kuki-how are drugs affecting you?  Hope all is ok and to plan.  I am up and down, but really truly feel if we stay together DH will let us use the final frosties rather than let them perish, and if we split up I will be marching myself to the nearest sperm bank in sight, so its win win!!  Just another delay!

colesmammy,   peed off for you, but you never know, the dates and planning are not an exact science no matter what the DRs say, nature still has to play its part xxxx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Evening Ladies

Just a quickie - AF arrived in full flow saturday night so thats me done with the loopy drugs for 3 months! had a little cry (well a big one) but feel much better now and if I am honest as time goes on the voice in my head saying DD may be our only one is getting louder and louder and I actually think I am ok with it sort of.... 
anyway off to my brothers tomorrow for a couple of days so need to go and pack... looking forward to the break but SIL is PG with number 2 so will have to bite my lip a bit but hey ho thats life!!! xxxx


----------



## harrysmum19

Hi ladies,
Hope you don't mind me butting in on this thread. I just wanted to ask before our appointment on Wednesday, what to expect when having IVF second time around after a gap. Here's a brief history:
We conceived after our first attempt at ICSI and had our gorgeous son Harry in October 2010. Sadly our little boy was born with noonans syndrome and passed away in January of this year, leaving us devastated and childless. We now have the strength to try again, but are not sure what to expect at the sub-fertility clinic. We thought that we could just return to the IVF clinic and start again, but as our last bloods / cycle tests were done in Autumn 2009, and treatment commenced in Dec 2009, our results are out of date. We've had a sperm test and my bloods taken at day 5 and day 22 last month in order to get referred again, our doctors did that. Just wanted to know what to expect - we are being NHS funded this time (hopefully)
hope to hear from you soon!
Lisa xxxx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Welcome HarrysMum, I am so sorry for what you have been through and admire your strength, sorry can't answer your question but you will get loads of support here.

Loopy   sorry for my ignorance but is there a reason you can't try something more than just clomid ie IUI/IVF, I hope you can enjoy your daughter over the coming months.

Sabah DS is too young to have a clue really, points at my belly button and says baby and has got very clingy last few days (he is usually happy to wave me off) oh and gets cross when I hold other babies/toddlers. I hope you and DH can come to the right decision for your family.

TTFN

xx


----------



## LadyN

Ladies thanks for your lovely thoughts.   
AF came on friday and has gone today hurray!    Im feeling very low in my mood but have recovered from my nasty viral infection that i do believe exacerbated my 2ww symptoms.  Ive had a lot of cramping during my period this month, sore pokey cramps and i wouldnt at all be suprised if i had an ovarian cyst lingering in there.  I had a large cyst on my ovary when i was pregnant but it never came to anything and im positive thats why i get so much pain down there throughtout my cycle.  
Is there anything that can be done about cysts? Should i ask my gp to refer to me to gynecology? It could be a second factor in why we cant concieve number 2? 
Harrysmum   reading your post brought a tear to my eye.  Good luck on your new journey, we'll be here to support you every step hun xx
Sleepy, Kukim Sabah, Coles mamma - how are we all doing?
Loopy - you ok hun?
Princessem - im the same with the resenting other mums at toddler group, instead i take my son to softplay so we can play one on one as he has plenty of interaction being at nursery 4 mornings whilst im working so i avoid mother and baby sessions like the plague! 
I hate that "is he an only child" "when you having another" "you need to give him a brother or sister" I could throttle them there and then    but then i say to myself stop it your being horrid and its not their fault your husband has lazy sperm   
  xxx


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Hi ladies. I'm feeling miserable today as I think it hasn't worked AGAIN!!! I'm 13dpo today and my temp alo dropped yesterday to just above coverline but has gone up by .1 this morning but I was very hot when I woke this morning so that's probably why. I'm expecting af in the next day or 2 aswell. I used a opk this morning aswell just to see what it said and it was negative and only 1 line so from what I've read on here that means a bfn so rubbish isn't it xxx

Sorry for me post but am at work so not got much time xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies

LadyN and Loopy Loo    x

Sweetcheeks it aint over till the fat lady sings or in your case the witch turns up...good luck huni x    

Hello and welcome to Harrysmum...good luck with your tx    x

I'm so relaxed this cycle as I know I wont be pregnant this month as only managed bms once around ovulation...theres always next month I suppose

Big hello to everyone else x x


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,
Can I join you?? I am about to start on my 6th IVF this weekend, I will be downregging with Burselin.

I was lucky enough to have twins on our 3rd cycle in 2008 but sadly my little boy had a terminal condition and only survived a couple of hours.  They arrived 12 weeks early and my little girl spent 7 weeks in SCBU but is now a happy, healthy, naughty, typical 3 year old.

I had a cycle in December - BFN and I abandoned a cycle in June as I failed to downreg (never happened before). So now I am waiting for AF to start this weekend and I'll be injecting my downreg drug for 1st time.

This cycle is a huge mix of emotions for me, I am so excited to be trying again, I feel so blessed to have my daughter but I had a terrible pregnancy and knew at 20 weeks that one of the twins would not survive and that the entire pregnancy could end at any moment.  

However - thankfully we do have our lovely little girl and I would love her to have a sibling but if it doesn't happen, as gutted as I'll be, I know that I'm really lucky to have her....

Apologies for my long, rambling introduction, I'm really looking forward to getting to know everyone.

Love and luck to you all,
Bickers xx


----------



## harrysmum19

Hi Bickers,
A warm welcome to you - I've only been on this thread once before but everyone seems lovely!
I wish you all the luck in the world on your ttc journey. We are hoping to have another attempt before christmas after losing our son in january this year to a fatal heart condition.
lots of love
Lisa xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Well dp was on nights last night and at 8pm came walking through the door they had all been laid of  so back to worrying about money, since he was made redundant 5 months ago its been the story of our lifes, we thought he had a while in this job thats why we were ttc no2, now I dont know what to do carry on or postpone for a little while....AF due next week so we have until then to decide I suppose...sorry for the me post.



Hope everyone is well x


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

Lisa - Thanks for the warm welcome.    for all you've been through, I know there are no words....  I'm so happy you're feeling strong enough to give it another go before Christmas.  It's taken me until the last few months to feel up to trying again and all those fears still swim around my head but you know what - we have to stay positive and believe it will work again - because it will!  

Coles Mammy - hello, I'm so sorry about your news   

Bickers xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

hello ladies!

back from my jaunt away, had a nice time even with the weather !!

Bickers & Harrysmum - hello and welcome, hope your tx is more straightforward this time. you are both very brave to go through it all again after what happens but then I think the longing for a family overrides everything, my BF had a little boy in feb this year 15 weeks early and he passed away after 7 weeks of fighting and she is thinking about restarting IVF next year (he was tx #9 for them) and i am in awe of her constantly... 

Sleepy - we can not get IUI or IVF on NHS because of DD so would have to fund ourselves which is just not possible at the moment so after the next lot of clomid we will be TTC naturally.. Hope you and bump are ok 

Colesmammy - I am so sorry about DH's job, it never rains but it pours eh?? Hope money is not too tight and he can find a new job sooner rather than later.. 

Hope everyone else is ok, anyone doing anything nice for bank holiday?? I have a few friends coming over on sunday for a open house thingy looking forward to relaxing with a glass of vino or 2!! 
Liking not being on clomid at the moment, my skin was awful and thats cleared up and I feel less emotional too! One of my friends has gave me a number for a medium so am thinking about going to see her and see what she says....

love
Lou
xx


----------



## janine-blessme

Hiya ladies
Hope u don't mind me joining 
Little history 
Unexplained infertility ttc over 5 years before conceived first go of iui baby girl may 2009 
Ttc again from summer 2010 
Iui June 2011 BFN crushed 
Trying one last time September 2011

Scared stiff !!! Stimming tomixifen 40mg 

This is our final go due to cost now we self funded not feeling very positive as already been blessed surly I can never be that lucky again also feel slit of guilt am I doing the right thing why can't I feel happy with what I have been blessed with 

Be great if anyone can be cycle buddy too ??

Janine x


----------



## Bickers

Hi Janine,

I am new to this board too.  Welcome!! I have just started downregging, I'm on day 3 of my injections and will have my baseline scan on the 6th September, hopefully I will start stimming then too, so it looks like we should on a cycle at roughly the same time  

I can totally relate to all the feelings of guilt etc. but I think if any of us had/could conceive naturally, we wouldn't give a 2nd thought to trying for number 2. 

Bickers xx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies hope everyone had a nice weekend
I dont have time for personals at work in an hour..we have decided to carry on ttc I fel like I'm not getting any younger so dont want to postpone it..dp is willing to take any job going so    something will come up soon...AF is due on saturday but not holding up much hope that I will be pregnant as pnly got to bms once this month...I think I will test Friday anyone else testing this week? x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hi Ladies

Janine - welcome, TTC no2 opens a flood gate of emotions all of which are totally normal on this board! I ave found this time round much more harder and that took me compleatly by surprise. Hope this tx goes well, I am having a 3 month break of tx at moment but TTC naturally so keep posting and look forward to chatting with you.

Colesmammy - hope all is ok with you, hard desicion to make about carrying on ttc but your DP sounds like he is a grafter so you should be ok in the long run, sometimes you just have to push on - if I waited til we could afford children I would never have had them ha ha!!

AFM - feeling a bit down at moment think it is a mixture of things, DD starting school in a couple of weeks what it all means etc.. sometimes I just get so bored with the same thoughts running round my head!! 

hi to all to all the other ladies - Sleepy,KG,Sabah,Kuki,Bickers,Lady N and anyone I have missed xx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi Loopy sorry to hear your feeling a bit down    hope you start to feel better soon, I'm doing ok just waiting for Af to come on saturday (which I'm sure it will) then have a proper bash at ttc not just once a month like last month due to dps shifts   

Hi Janine and Bickers welcome to the thread    you both get your 2nd miracle x

LadyN and Sweetcheeks  you have been very quiet where are you hiding? x

Like I said AF is due Saturday and am pretty sure it will come my (.)(.) are quite tender at the minute and I'm feeling really tired, we are going to Flamingo Land for the day so thats something to look forward to, C will love the zoo and rides


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies,

I was wondering if I could join you all?

I started DR injections on 29/8 and following a LP. As I have irregular periods I am on burselin for 2 weeks and if no AF then we will discuss next stage.

Is any one else out there on DR ? How are you feeling? 

Good Luck  to every one!


----------



## Bickers

Colesmammy - thanks for the welcome, hope you have a great time at FlamingoLand and that your sore boobs and tiredness turn out to be a good sign??   

LoopyLou - thanks for your welcome.  I can totally empathise with you   . DD starts pre-school next week and this time next year, I'll be exactly where you are now. I've been really laid back about everything but now that she's starting school, I feel like it's crept up on me, until it's all I think about..... I know it's such a cliche but it is all a rollercoaster isn't it

Kamie - Welcome aboard.  I am downregging right now on Burselin.  My first time on this downregging drug.  It's knocked me for 6.  I feel nausea, constant headaches and so ridiculously tired, I just want to sleep all day long!!!  I hope you're coping with it better that I am. I'm hoping they'll halve the dose next week, when I start stimming.....

Bickers xx


----------



## miraclex2

Good morning ladies I'm out this month AF arrived in full flow this morning and 2 days early    good luck to everyone else this month x


----------



## Bickers

Coles mammy - so sorry.

Bickers xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,

Hope you are all doing well. Sorry do not know many of you but will try..

Loo, I know how you feel.. So bloody hard.. Lara will start school next year but I will finilise all baby thing at the end of the year.. I just had enough with it.. Maybe you are right.. We might just meant to be family of 3. Although I never ever felt that way.. Sending lots of     

    Who ever needs them..

KG? SP? Sabah? How are you all?

Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Hi Kuki, how are you doing? Are you on 2ww? Keeping everything crossed that this is your time, and you won't have to consider giving up on your dream. Would love to say that all is well here, but unfortunately spent the day in A&E yesterday and I have been diagnosed with a hernia. It is soooo painful, I can hardly do a thing at the mo, but it can't be fixed whilst pg, so I have to put up with it.

Loopy, sorry you are feeling down. My ds doesn't start school until next year, but already I feel like we're counting down to it.

Lots of new ladies on here - wishing you all loads of luck and hugs for those who have had disappointments this month. It doesn't get any easier when you're ttc no2.

Kx


----------



## janine-blessme

That's for the welcome ladies 
it's nice to know I'm not the only one struggling with emotions 
AFM stimming at moment with first iui scan on Monday 
never thought I would be as emotional as first time round how wrong was I lol  
Janine


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Lovely to hear from you.. and I am so sorry you had to bear such a pain.. So unlucky. But as long as baba is okay.. You will cope some how.. How is baby? How far you are now? We are hoping to catch up with you of course.. still ever positive..
I don't want to give up my dream KG.. I so don't want to..
Lara wants to go to big girls school now.. She can not wait but she is like your DS.. It will be Sep 2012 whens she goes.. And we have to get her a space still.. Will be Jan we apply for it.. 

Yes yes lots and lots of luck to all of us.. 

Love to you all. 

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki From your  signature it looks like it is congrats on being Pupo so glad it all went through   for you.

KG rotten luck at least your know what is causing the problem even though there is nothing you can do at the moment.

Loo DD starting school must be so hard it is tough for 'normal' Mums   for you.

Hi to all the newbies nothing new here on the downhill slope and waiting for D day.

x


----------



## KG

Kuki, 22wks already! Aren't our LOs growing up! Ds came home all sad from nursery yesterday cause some of his friends are off to big school. He hasn't mentioned going himself, but probably because we started him at pre-school, which is attached to the primary school, so he feels more grown up there than at nursery. We're off on hols with no I ternet connection, so I will be looking round for somewhere with wifi to catch up on how you are doing and will be thinking of you and hopefully celebrating a bfp for you when we get back.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sp, hi hon.. how are you? you are nearly to meet your second miracle.. I remember the day you came and told us you were preggers.. Time just flies..

KG, lets hope so hun.. I really hope so.. Enjoy hols.. 

Love to you all. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

*Good morning ladies,*

*I am not very positive today. I think they left me already. I had pains etc yesterday. But now all is gone.. I felt the same last FET. And I was right.. Unless this time there was a very very smooth implantion. Which I very much doubt. They are never is.. Always pretty painful.
* 
*Last night I felt like coldsores coming up. And feeling fluiey.. I hope my immunes have not killed them already..*

*We have our local market today. Will do some shopping. That should cheer me up.. Well it will be mainly baby clothes shopping for my friends who are expecting boys.. Nevermind still will be fun..*

*I hope you are having more luck than me..*

*I listen to myself today and tomorrow. Should know more by monday..If there are no pains.. I know they have gone..*

*Love. Kukixx*


----------



## Loopy Loo

Morning all

Kuki- glad you are back with us, sorry you are feeling so down today the constant symptom spotting can really get to you. I am hoping so much that this is it for you and next week you will get that positive result you so deserve xx

Will be be back later to do more personals on my phone so can not type well!!

Lou
Xx


----------



## LadyN

Colesmammy - still here hun! Had a wee break before I had a break down! Only managed 1 go of bms on ov day this month. Had a lot of screaming matches with dh as he won't agree to having icsi after Xmas so things ain't rosie at home just now. Not sure when af I'd due, haven't charted this month as feeling pretty low & so busy with work. 
Hope your well hun <3

Hope everyone else is good too. Baby dust to you all xxxxx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Sorry didnt get a chance before now to come back!!

Kuki - hope you are feeling a little better today, are you still in Turkey or are you and Lara back in UK?

KG- cant belive you are halfway already! thanks for your kind thoughts, feel ok about DD going to school but I just didnt imagine not having any more children by the point she went to school.

Sleepy - not long! countdown to D Day!! hope you are ok 

Hi to everyone else, hoping some positive engery starts flowing for all of us soon xx

lots of love
Lou
xx


----------



## janine-blessme

Hiya ladies

Hope everyone ok 
AFM I'm in for my first iui scan in morning nerves starting to kick it's funny I  never get used to it all


----------



## Kuki2010

*Good morning ladies,
* 
*Did a very cheap home test and negative. Well if there were two healthy pregnancy I should have a line today. I know there will be one. This is how I came to this conclusion;
On friday night I had one on left and one on right pains. On sat morning left one stopped all together.. But on and off right one still going.. So I think we still have one with us.. Unless left one has implanted with no probs whats so ever and right is still struggling? Who knows!!!*

*I am still very very positive. And Peaceful.. Even though I cope with only 2-3 hrs sleep a night.. *

*Busy next 3 days.. Will be on line on today and tomorrow but on wed a friend of mine taking my laptop to Uk. That way I don't have much to carry with me when we are flying.. *

*I need to get on with my phone calls but can not get off FF..*

Loo,
Still in Istanbul. Fly back on thursday morning. Can not wait. Lara has got more cold.. Awful mood. Very demanding.. And I am so aggitated cos of the drugs..Which does not help.. No patients what so ever. Normaly I am so so good.

Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Quick post as am work....KUKI      it will all be ok, stop with the symptom spotting, it is not a science!!! And don't keep telling yourself off for how you are feeling, its temporary while you are on all the drugs, you will be ahppy mummy again for Lara very soon, with a brother / sister or both for her in your tummy xxxx


----------



## miraclex2

Lady N sorry to hear things are not to good at home, maybe not charting this month will do you good and be the break you need    x x 

Kuki    this is it for you x x

Loopy hope your well x x

Janine good luck for scan hun xx

Sorry its short and sweet I have a really awful ear infection been to docs this morning, inside my ear is so swollen she could hardly see inside    anti biotics for a week   . I'm cd5 and were really gonna go for it this month    my brother was talking to dp at my nephews birthday party yesterday and saying he thinks were mad for ttc and should be happy for what we have, its easy for him to say he has 2 children a girl and boy. I know he doesnt mean any harm with his comments, were very close I think its more he is worried how ttc will affect me, he can just be very vocal with his comments at times.

Hope everyone is well and had a nice weekend x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
I am going nuts.. Thank you hun.. I am trying.. 

Coles mum,
They just don't get it.. ignore them.. 

Lara won't sleep. she is not well today. Her cold is worse.. Anyway I should go for a walk and get soem things done.. 

Will catch up later.

Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,

Feeling very down today. I will get on with the day. And hope for the best.. I wish I could just stop thinking about it..

This is what I wrote to my dairy this morning;

*6DP5DT 06/09/11 Tuesday (Transfer were done on wed 31/08/11) LMP is 12/08/2011.*

*CHEAP TURKISH TEST IS NEGATIVE!*

*I have slept well last night. Woke up a few times but manage to get back to sleep. *

*I had awful pains all day long yesterday but last night it has stoped and have not came back. So worried now they have left me for good.. Unless they have attached properly and now it is settled. Which I very much doubt it.. It never is like that in my pregnancies..*

*I am so so worried.. Trying to stay positive.. *

*We are busy today.. Got to achieve a lot and going to be annoying and stressing. Cos I have to deal with some idiots in here.. *

*Wish me luck!! I need those pains to get back and make me suffer..*

*Love. Kukixx*

Wishing a great day..

Talk later. Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki No words just        

xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Oh Kuki - wishing so hard that this is your time... Sending lots of love to you over there in Turkey xxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Darlings,
Going nuts..
I made the decision regarding blood test. I am going to go to American Hospital before airport. Booked my usual taxi man. He will wait for me outside the hospital. They will have to text the result to my english mobile. Now that will be funny. i have to text one of the nurses so make sure she gets text so she can text me back.. I can call them from airport that is failling I have bought one of these funny cards to use it in TR.. 
Thrusday will be day 8dp5dt. I should have soem hormons.. 2 more days to find out..
Talk later. I need to get out of the house before I totally lose it ..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## daisy-may

Thinking of u kuki x
Much love to everyone else .. 

We all ok , house move went well but no phoneline or internet still .. Dex just gorge ! Max fab and daisy is now doin well despite a and e visit for a rash that looked like menengitis rash and throat and ear infections .. 

And me I'm good, tired but good and loving the support of my family . . Back soon and lots love x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Morning Ladies,

Kuki - think you are flying home today so just sending you a ton of love and postive thoughts, we are all here for you no matter what happens but in the meantime I am wishing like crazy that those embies are snuggling in nicely xxx  

Daisy - lovely to hear from you, sounds like the twins are going from strength to strength and I have been flollowing your diary and am so pleased you are back near your parents and getting the support you need xx

Colesmammy - forgot to post earlier about that comment from your brother in law   try to ignore it hun people who have not gone through IF have no idea about it whatsoever. Hows DP's job hunt any luck yet?? xx

Hi to everyone else lurking xx

DD starts school next thursday and I am doing ok at the moment, am glad that I am not on the clomid at the moment as dont think I coud handle all the extra emotional outbursts!!  Starting to plan a few things in my mind such as starting swimming again whilst she is at school and may look into a few classes . I also have made 2 really good friends at pre school who are in the same boat as me so we are going to meet up weekly which will be nice.

lots of love to all 
xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Kuki    this is your time    thinking of you x x

Loopy thats really nice that you have met 2 ladies in the same situation, when I was going through tx years ago I met a girl on here and we are still the best of friends now, she adopted 2 children but is now 30wks pregnant thru icsi    its been amazing to share our experiences and the ups and downs IF brings. A break from clomid will do you good I remember it sending me slightly    lol. No news on the work front yet but keeping everything crossed something comes up soon  x

Daisy hello there we had our ds's at the same time over 2yrs ago, brilliant news on the move x

Hello to everyone else hope your all well x


----------



## Kuki2010

Darlings,

Blood Test is Negative!

I have to say I am still very peaceful! I must be finally loosing.. 

At home and feeling so so happy to be here.. 

Will stay on meds till AF turns up just in case...

What can I say? My lucky No 7 just let me down.

Will write more tomorrow. 

Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Oh honey, my heart breaks for you


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Stoping all the meds except steriods. Got to them slowly surely..
Treatmetns iwht mum and family is over. 
Reprofit here we come.
I have never got pregnant with FET.. All my pregnancies were fresh cycles..
So want to do a fresh cycle with all the immunes and end the ivf jouney.. 
Will decide when in next few days..
DH is tucking Lara in bed. I will get some soup for us to eat and bed with some cuddles.. 
This whole journey is madness but will get to peace some how..
Weird thing is I am so relaxed and calm. No crying nothing.. Hope it won't hit me late.. 
Nite nite.. 
Love. Kukixx


----------



## daisy-may

kuki ... pm your way xxx


----------



## LadyN

kuki    hope your ok    
coles mammy - hope your on the mend hun. 
loopy - thats great you have additional support, i feel so on my own at times. I need to lay off the gin it's becoming a bad routine each night once DS is in bed    maybe i need professional help (again?) I hate being on anti-depressants but they really do work for me.  
daisy - wow! house move with 3 kids well done! your super mamma  
afm - i dont even know were im at with this month but ive had awful gas these past two days. its that bad i feel i have knots in my tummy and have gone to the loo in work just to pass wind    no joke!! Im like an old man, trouser coughing but having to squeeze it out! Sorry ladies TMI i know but its so not like me!! 
i think my period is due next wednesday but im not 100% - only managed bms once this month as me & dh can barely talk without wanting to kill one another - yet again another symptom of the TTC witch within me. Im such a bad tempered wee woman just now its so not good  xx


----------



## Kuki2010

LadyN,
Thank you hun. I think I am okay.. Not sure.. Not angry. Not upset. Not one tear droped. First ever for me.. 
Before all these nightmare started I used to be like this. Nothing could bring me down.. Not sure what is happening.. is it finally my mind has started to let go? Who knows.. Something is happening..Not sure what though..
I hope you are doing okay..
Love.Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki   

Daisy didn't realise you were moving wow that must have taken some juggling 

 vibes to everyone.

x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Kuki - so sorry to hear your news, glad you are back safe and sound with us here in the UK though...  Intresting what you say about feeling different and not crying I am having more days where i am accepting our situation than not if you know what I mean. You are such a strong lady that I suppose that instinct has kicked in again. Be kind to yourself over the next few days and have a few treats xxx

Lady N - hope you are feeling better with your wind thing , your post did make me laugh! Sorry that you seem to be having rows with DH things get out of hand so easily when you are caught up in this world of IF dont they?

Sleepy - hope you and bump are ok xx

Hi to everyone else x

off to accupunture today and talk to him about changing my days etc.. now I am not on the clomid he will be happy to have a free rein on me i think!! also off out wth a couple of mums from Pre school tonight to pamper night - i am booked in to see a medium so will let you know what she says!!!  
Lou
xx


----------



## miraclex2

Kuki big big    I have no words that could possibly make you feel any better, just want you to know your in my thoughts x x

LadyN I have missed you, hey it only takes once so you never know its not over till the ugly witch rears her head   

Hi loopy ohhh yes please let us know what the medium says x

Hello to everyone else, nothing to report here apart from its my last day of anti biotics and this stupid ear infection hasnt cleared up altogether    still feels quite tender, maybe another trip to doctors?? x


----------



## Kuki2010

Darlings,

you are so lovely..   

SP, no I am not moving.. I am staying put.. you mean moving on?

Ladies,
I think I will dive into the 8th cycle while Ihave all the immunes drugs in my system. But not sure when.. How soon.

Will write more when I have time..

Trying to unpack all and to go back to some kind of normallyty..

I am really looking forward to the weekend without any poxy txing stress..

Love to you all..

Kukixx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies I'm currently cd10 and had lots of EWCM yesterday and this morning niggles in my ovaries we had bms Wed Thurs and Friday. I think this is pretty early to ovulate isnt it? I am gonna carry on bms for the next few days just incase x

Kuki hope you have a nice relaxed weekend x

Hello to everyone else x


----------



## Kuki2010

Coles,

It sometimes happens to me. I ovulate on day 9.

Thank you. Having a great weekend. Had a really good time at BBQ last night.. Today sunday branch.. Cannot wait.. 

Got to go quick food shopping before branch.. Which I am not looking forward to but I shall get it done asap and enjoy my sunday after that..

Wishing you all a great sunday.. It just looks so beautiful out there this morning in Herts.

Love. Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hello Ladies!

Sorry been AWOL for a few days we took DD on a overnight trip to Chessington before she starts school on thursday, had a lovely time and made even better by the fact that when we got in the car to come home she said "we've had real fun today havent we? thank you mummy and daddy!" I mean my heart just melted!!

Kuki - hope you are ok hun, glad to see you have made a little plan to move forward - sometimes its the planning that upsets you the most. Hoping Reprofit can work their magic, they do seem to have good results with lots of women on this site. Will you do all the immunes stuff again too?

ColesMammmy- went to see tarot and spritulist the other evening! Both said about my longing for another child before I had even said anything, Tarot lady concentrated a bit more on whats going on with my Dad (partner moved into his house, he hasnt got a will me and my sister think that he should protect himself and what he owns etc..) but she did say I got the Star card next to the motherhood card which was next to the abundence card which apparently means my wish eventually will come true! however she was quick to point out that I could interpret that as my motherhood wish has come true with DD so I was left a bit confused!   The spiritulist was a bit better and said that my DH had to stop wearing tight pants! And that by the spring she could see all my family gathered drinking Champagne and me not ... She did keep going back to spring saying new beginning etc.. She was really good and there was no prompting by me whatsoever even about the tight pants bit!!!  

Hello to all the other lovely ladies xxx

Lou
xxx

Ps i can confirm DH is no longer wearing tight pants he is now in loose cotton boxers!


----------



## LadyN

hi ladies, the wkd witch is here tomorrow and i havent poas yet! Ive had some symptoms, mainly frequent wee'ing, huge zits, fuzzy head when i get up too quick & then this morn i was washing in the shower and felt different down there. Like things were lower, harder, swollen? not sure if its a sign but later on the boobs felt fuller, another zit appeared and i have had no cramps or niggles at all this month which is out of the ordinary for me!
so... how is everyone? im feeling really calm   
loopy - i have a tarot night in a few weeks & looking forward to it. defo get that will sorted hun!
x


----------



## miraclex2

Hi Lady N really    the witch doesnt get you hun     x

Loopy I really giggled at the tight pants bit    good luck I really hope the medium is right about you not drinking champagne     x

I'm currently cd14 and think we have covered all avenues with bms this month lol last month my cycle was 26 days, month before 28 so not really sure when AF would be due?? I think if the witch hasnt shown up by the 29th then I'm in with a good chance    x

Hope everyone else is ok its been rather quiet on here recently x


----------



## LadyN

Ladies - no AF yet!! I am petrified to test. May need to sneak out to get a test later.  I feel like i have a gurgling gut this morning & my big boil on my chin is defo something i recall from being pregnant 1st time round.     

Colesmammy -    this is your lucky month too darling!
How is everyone doing today? Its still gale force winds in sunny scotland - great day to hang out the washing! x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Lady N - quizzed father again today and he's doing the will tomorrow ! 

Hope we start getting some BFP's on this thread there have not been enough and we all Soooo deserve them !! 

xxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Loo,
yes we want more more BFPs...
Love. Kukixx


----------



## LadyN

Colesmammy - how are you hun? Fingers crossed for you this month   
Loopy - keep @ him till its done!
AFM - POAS yesterday with boots digi and BFN. Grrrr....!!! Still no AF and she was due yest. Will hang off till sunday and test again.
Feeling gloom tonight    I need a BFP     
Lady xx


----------



## Kuki2010

LadyN,
I am so very sorry. Lets wait and see.. Maybe it is too early. It is good to know AF is not around.
Love.
Kukixx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi LadyN I'm fine cd16 for me today...ohh no AF really hope it stays like that    I have everything crossed for you x

Hi kuki hope your well x


----------



## miraclex2

Meant to mention in previous post dp got a job yeyyyyyyy its not fantastic money but its a job all the same, its not permanent but until March so at least we can get xmas out of it, I'm so proud of him he has gone from having a very good job to working in a factory but he just wants to be able to provide for us...and also WE GOT A PUPPY    my mam's shih tzu had puppys 8 weeks ago and she has let Cole choose one hes a gorgeous little boy that C has named Woody (he loves toy story). C is a little jealous of him but seems to be coming round a bit now so the house has been chaos the last few days, and thats just the way I like it lol now all we need is baby no2 to make our family complete    x


----------



## Loopy Loo

Colesmammy - yay for DP getting a job!! Fingers crossed your luck continues this month x hope Puppy is behaving himself xx

Kuki - hope u are ok, any news on reprofit?? x

Lady N - the month to month cycles does grind you down, hope AF stays away xxx

AFM - DD started school yesterday and I cried my eyes out!!! She was fine, just kept having the thoughts of "this might be the only time I do this..." anyway feel abit better today and was really proud this morning when she went in and said good morning to her teacher in her sweetest voice!! 

Lou
Xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,

We went to see The inbenweeners Movie last night. It was brilliant.. Loved it.. Go and see it if you are into them..

Today I am going to get my hair done.. Looking forward to freshen up.. Did my eyebrows and nails last week. So my beauty treatments will be complete. Will do my feet tomorrow. Will start my new week as gorgeous 41 young lady.. 

Still in my Euporic State and loving it..

And send my First Virtual Visit Form to Reprofit. So excited.. This will be our last treatment and I know it..

Love to you all..

Hope you are having a great weekend..

Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Kuki- glad to see you are doing well, pleased that your plans at Reprofit are taking shape and also you are having a few treats and spoiling yourself, the tx really can knock the stuffing out of you xxx

Am so tired today as did our town carnival with the Pre school yesterday and was decorating the float from 8am then
walked the 4 mile route! Had such a good day though, so lazy day today with DH cooking dinner later yum yum x

Lou
xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning ladies,

Wishing you all a great week. It is beautiful sunny in here.. But cold though.. 

I have chesty cold. Feel crap..Feeling happy about that.. Meaning my immunes are down..

Went to ikea yesterday. Did buy lots of things.. Today waiting for my delivery.. Got a new matris.. And new set of sheets.. I am so looking forward to set it all up..

Loo, manage to find a great apartment to rent in Brno but it is so hard to get the dates right. Worried next AFwill be early or late and mucking all myplans.. But no one knows.. I just have to go with it.. 
How are you?

How are you all?

Love. 
Kukix


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

I have been lurking for a few weeks but not posting much.  

I have my EC booked for Wednesday morning.  Trigger injection tonight and I have a worry that I feel only you ladies will understand.  If all goes well to ET on Friday, I worry about picking up my 3 year old during the 2ww, especially in and out of the car seat and when she jumps on me after pre-school.  I know I will just have to get on with it but it does worry me.

I hope you're all well. 

Bickers xxxx


----------



## KG

Hi ladies, just bsck from hols and catching up.

Kuki, so sorry that it didn't work out for you this time - I was thinking about you, but had no internet. Sounds like your plans are well in place for the next go.

Bickers, wishing you lots of luck. I have had to get more and more careful about lifting ds, I ws careful-ish in 2ww, then more so when I was bleeding in early pg, now, with a hernia, I can't lift him at all. I've quickly found some ways around lifting - encouraging him to get in and out of his car seat on his own, and holding his hands whilst he jumps out of the car; counting, 1,2,3...jump, when I lifted him, which takes off a lot of the strain; getting him to stand on the stairs, or a stool and lifting him from there instead of from floor height. I also get down to his level for cuddles, so we're not missing out and have spent a lot of time telling him about my 'poorly tummy' and he quickly stopped jumping on me. Hope this helps.

Kx


----------



## Bickers

KG - thanks so much for all your ideas. I particularly love the stool idea, it's the car seat that worries me the most, I think I will put a little stool in the footwell, so she can climb up and down herself, she'll love that!!

It's my drug free day today    Had my trigger shot last night and ready for EC at 7.00 am tomorrow.

Have a lovely day ladies,

Bickers xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
Good luck with ET.. I have boughth Ikea stool. And used that to everything..

Kg,
Thank you hun.. Will do my last own Egg fresh cycle and draw a line to it for 2012. Want to enjoy Lara fully before she goes to school. And concentrate on me.. Go back to work in 2013 and buy our house etc.. Than try for donor embryo than if we are still desperate and want one. So probably 2014 will be the year I try again for embryo adoption. But I honestly think in december I am going to get pregnant.. I am sure of it..The change will help as well as Streiods..
How are you feeling at the mo? Still painful? 25 weeks already.. Nearly nearly there.. 

Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

I have been on this thread once before but have not kept up with everyone.

I am stimming at the moment and due to have EC early next week. I am now getting really worried as my 2 year old son has become really clingy since i started Dring in august. My DH is due to take over most of the care of my son while I am on the 2ww as I am scared he will kick me and worried about  lifting. I am lucky as my DH will drop Ds to nursery 3 days a week and the weekends we have booked lots of fun things for the two of them to do together. So I just have the two days a week which the grandparents have all said they will take it in turn to help. I just can not help feeling as though I am being a bad Mummy  wanting another child. I love my family to bits but going through tx again is so difficult.

How have other people found the TX process with a young child to care for?

Sorry I have gone on a bit.

I will try and catch up with everyone and post some messages x


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

At EC yesterday I only managed to produce 3 eggs - my lowers amount ever.  But I just had my call from the clinic and 2 fertilized and go back in tomorrow woo hoo!!! I've spent a very worried night, preparing myself for having nothing to transfer.

We have ET tomorrow afternoon.      

Kamie - I completely understand how you feel, I am so worried about picking up DD during the 2ww but ultimately she is my priority and I am just praying for some good luck and hoping for the best!

Bickers xx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hi all

Been a bit busy recently with settling into school an still helping out at Pre school so haven't had a chance to get on and post!

Bickers - keep up the positive thoughts 2 going in tomorrow and hopefully they will do their thing and settle nicely in mummys tummy xx

KG - you are having a right old time of it! Hope you are feeling ok xx

Hi to everyone else hope u are all well xxxx


----------



## KG

Hi everyone, 

Bickers, wishing you all the luck in the world for tomorrow! 

Kuki, I know what you mean about spending time with our LOs before they are off to school. I've shed a few tears this week cause T has had to go to nursery 4 days cause I can't look after him properly at the mo, with all the pain. It seems like they are growing up too fast.

Kamie, sending you hugs. I'm sure all of us on this board have spent time wondering what is best for our LOs when it comes to trying again. I can't say it was easy doing tx with a LO around, if only from a practical point of view of getting to appointments and so on. Being pg with a LO is hard going too, as you can't just rest up when you need to, but I believe it is worth it in the end. I think I wanted a brother or sister for ds as much as I wanted another one for me and dh - and he is so excited about the baby.

Loopy, how is N settling into school? It must be so strange when they are out of the house every day.

Take care, everyone,
Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Poor you.. Toby will be fine.. And once baby is here.. You will feel a lot better. And 3 of you can enjoy to the full till he goes to school. 
I have seen so many people with new born babies at the shops.. And felt so deep down how much I want one..I don't know how I am going to draw the line to treatmetns after this next cycle. Scared already..

Have a great weekend all.

Love. Kukixx


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for all your positive thoughts!  I had ET yesterday, 2 of my 3 eggs fertilised and I have a grade 1 and a grade 2 on board now     DH has been fantastic and I have been dodging picking up DD but there was no avoiding it a couple of times today   

Kuki - Its so hard looking at new borns when we want another one - they seem to be everywhere!!   

KG - Time does seem to be going so fast at the moment, DD started preschool this month and it just seems as though she's in the school system now and that's it    Im sure we'll get used to it soon.

Hi Loopy Lou and Kamie   

Have a great weekend everyone.

Bickers xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Hi ladies I dont know what to think did a clearblue plus test this morning and got a faint BFP showed dp and he could see it to...the thing is I use another site and theres a girl on there who got BFP using clearblue and it actually turned out to be a faulty test    I dont know what to think x


----------



## Bickers

Hi ColesMammy,

oooh sounds good - a BFP is a BFP!!     Can you get out to get another test and try again tonight?

Keeping it all crossed for you!!       

Bickers xxx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

I am due to have EC on Tuesday and feel anxious now as have had to arrange so many things. Need to be at hospital for 7am so had arrange for someone to get DS to nursery on Tuesday morning and on top of everything we have DS' first parents evening at nursery on monday evening. so many things seem to be happening.

KG - thanks for your message, I know I am doing the right thing. Hope things are going well for you.

Kuki - I know how you feel I take my son to a group on Fridays and half the women are pregnant and asking everyone else when they will have another one. Also DH's best friends are pregnant with second child and are trying to support us, but just saying the wrong thing, lastest question has been " which one of you has the problem". It is difficult.  

Coles Mammy - You may need to test again. Here is to you           hope you get another BFP  

Bricker - Glad ET went well. Remember to take things easy


----------



## miraclex2

hi ladies I did a clearblue digital yesterday and got BFP, still a little shocked.    there are some more bfps on this thread very very soon x

Kamie good luck for EC huni     x

Bickers praying your gonna join me very soon with a BFP x

hope everyone else is well  x x


----------



## sweetcheeks2009

Coles mammy. So happy for you  xx


----------



## KG

Great news, Coles mammy!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Ladies,
First time ever I have got something free from my GP. Some BCP. And he said to me he can not give me any drugs till I get pregnant. But once I get pregnant he will presciribe the Clexane for me. Oh well all I have to do now just get pregnant. That's all.  

I have to take a ****.. otherwise I get down.. And just don't want to.. I can feel the dark cloud is coming over me for sure.. 

I am going to start taking my BCP and steriods at the same time. I think it will help me with my next fresh cycle. With steriods I need to take Calcium and D3 well I am doing that anyway. And I should not take over 3 months. If we don't get pregnant. It will be max 7 weeks I take it with. I am hoping the same reaction; Euphoria. I have to say it has gone for now.. I am trying to drag it back to me but not happening..

Love and luck to you all. Come on!! We can do this!!!

Coles mammy, And you DID IT!.. Weldone you.. Fantastic news!

Kukixx


----------



## miraclex2

Kuki good luck      x

Kamie how did EC go?     

bickers how are you feeling    you get a  BFP x x x x

Hope everyone else is well...I have been to hospital today and been prescribed heparin injections and cyclogest and booked in to see cons next Tuesday to arrange early scan...i dont feel ready to leave you ladies yet so hope you dont mind me sticking around for a while x


----------



## Kuki2010

Coles mammy,
Oh yes please stay with us and give us lots and lots of hope..
Good luck with next tuesday. Sooo exciting...
Kukixx


----------



## miraclex2

Kuki dont worry you lot wont get rid of me that easily    and all my leftover good luck is being sent to each and everyone of you..I'm    for some more BFP's very very soon x


----------



## Bickers

ColesMammy - Congratulations, that's wonderful news.

Kuki - Good news about the BCP and Clexane - every penny helps!! 

AFM - 2ww. Embryologist said that if they did implant, today would be the most likely day, so I will start to over analyse immediately   .  It has been impossible to do this 2ww with DD.  Poor little thing has been so unwell this week, with a throat infection and it's just impossible not to pick her up and help her down etc.  I have to remind myself that she's my priority and whilst a sibling would be such a blessing, she's the miracle that is actually here - and this miracle seems determined to climb all over me at every opportunity   

My OTD is 7th October.  I am terrible for testing early - I love a pt, so will probably start early next week!!

I hope all you ladies are well, it's such a beautiful day today, 

Love and luck to everyone.

Bickers xxxxxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Coles mammy - congrats! What good news needs some at the moment.

Kuki - well done for getting something free from your GP. Sorry but what is bcp?  

KG- how you doing?  

Bricker - good luck for 7th October. Remember just because you have been lifting DD does not mean you will not get pregnant   

Thanks for all your messages. Well yestarday did not go to plan as we had no eggs. They now think i may have empty follicle syndrome. Any way we have been put back on down reggs till i get my AF and then i have to call the clinic
I have a new doctor he seems more into alternative therapy which i think will suite me better. I have been given the name of two natural herbal drugs i have to get for egg quality so i think we will start again in a month as the doctor said he is giving mea month off.
I have not cried yet and i think everyone is worried about me but i think i am still numb. I feel fine have been out today for a short walk and feel as though this was not meant to be can not explain it. I think DS makes me think it could still happen as when i had him we had one egg, told it was a low grade and informed that it may not happen for us.

Thanks for all all your support. 
Kamie xxx


----------



## Tillypops

Just wondering if it is worth me setting up a Pregnancy and Parenting thread on this board, so that those of you lucky enough to get another BFP can post about your pregnancies in detail without worrying about upsetting other members who are still trying?

It wouldn't mean pg ladies not posting within this thread and offering their support to their friends, but would give you more scope to chat about your worries and concerns during your pregnancy and then after the birth.

What do you think?

Tilly
xxxx


----------



## Bickers

Kamie - I'm so sorry to hear your news   I'm glad that you've got a new doctor and plans to move forward with your tx.  I know there's nothing I can say that will make you feel any better but do look after yourself    

Tilly - that sounds like a really nice idea, I think it would be pretty useful too.

Bickers xx


----------



## KG

Kuki, you will get your PMA back, hun, hang on in there., you've been through a lot recently and need some time to regroup. You will be fine.

kamie, so sorry, sending you hugs.

Bickers, please don't worry too much about lifting DD, you need to do it and I honestly think that it doesn't affect what is going on inside too much. Hope DD is better soon.

Tilly, a place for second (or more!) time parents-to-be to chat would be nice, either here or in the Pregnancy boards. I've often been surprised there isn't one in the pg section - I often seem to be in a different place in my head to the first time mums (most of who are much more organised than I am!)

Kx


----------



## Tillypops

I will set a thread up for you now ladies!

Tilly
xxxxx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hi ladies

Great idea to have another thread hope to see lots of you on it very soon.

Still waiting here no signs of bambino yet obviously too comfortable.

Fingers crossed for lots more BFP's (naturally if poss).

xxx


----------



## miraclex2

Tilly can you put the link on for the new thread please x

Sleeppenguin ohhh hopefully not long now    x

Hope everyone else is well x


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hi Coles Mammy here is the link see you over there 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=272345.new#new

xxx


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

Sadly I don't think this cycle has worked for me.  My OTD is Friday but I am testing negative, my last pregnancy - I tested pos from day 8.  Today is day 10.

I would normally say to people 'it's not over until test day' but today my boobs are back to normal, when I am preg, they are beyond painful!! Also all tummy twinges have disappeared.  So, for me, I know these are all the signs of a negative cycle.

However, I'm not going to be down for long and am already working out the dates for my next cycle, to see if my doc will let me go again before Christmas.

Good luck to everyone else.

Bickers xxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
I am so very sorry. Wait till OTD. You never know.
Wishing you lots of luck for next cycle.. 
Try not to get to down. I know how hard that can be.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Bickers

Thanks Kuki!

I am absolutely certain I have a BFN as my boobs have gone from not been sore anymore to shrinking!!!   I have AF pains and I know that it's just the Cyclogest holding off the bleed.

However I am fine today, I will test again on Friday, to confirm for the clinic. DH and I are hoping we can book in for another cycle by Christmas.

Hope you ladies are all well.  Sending you       for your next cycle.

Bickers xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
Glad you are feeling okay today. I know how you feel. I know it when it had worked or it had not. By almost day 7 past transfer I know the result..
Be extra kind to yourself in next coming days.
love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Bickers and Kuki,

Bickers - sorry to here  that you think things have not worked. You never know what Friday will bring. I know what you mean when I got my BFP everyone thought it had not worked as the chances where low but something inside me knew it had worked. Be strong and make sure you have time for yourself. let us know what happens . 

Kuki - Are you planning on trying again? and how is everything going for you?

Sorry have not been around for a bit. After cancelled tx, i took some time out and started to plan for another cycle before xmas. However, we went for a follow up appointment yestarday with the doctor who will be taking over our care, the nurse is nice but she gave me an appointment for yesterday over the phone and when we go there she told me it was for Wednesday (i am a lot of things but i have not lost the plot yet) i was confussed any way we got to see the doctor and guess what he charged us for taking all the same bloods again even though we had all our bloods done there in may. During our review he explained that he is confused as to why i have no eggs, My AMH is 10.9 which he says is good.so we had to have the conversation about egg donor which we have discussed in the past but to no great length. Who knows I am even more confussed and have felt ill since Monday. one thing I do know is that my son has to come first, this cycle has not affected him in any way or form.
so who knows at present i think i have to have another go at IVF, as you never know and I never want to regret trying to have a second child. If things do not work I will have to think about Egg donor.

sorry have been rambling but feel so lost.

kamie xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Kamie,
I am getting organise to go to Reprofit for our last own eggs and own sperm treatment. If this time it does not work we will try to go for double donor fresh cycle to Reprofit.
I have my precious little girl from my 1st treatment. This coming one will be my 8th TX. DD is going to be 4 in december. Next year she goes to school. I want to enjoy next year with her fully before she stars school and I go back to work.
Wishing you lots and lots of luck. 
Love.Kukixx


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

OTD today and as known - it's a BFN. Not one to let the grass grow, I have an appointment with my consultant this afternoon to book the next cycle. I think I will ask him if I can have a laparoscopy before the cycle.  I'd like to get both in before Christmas if possible.

I'm not looking forward to the mother of all AFs this weekend   

Have a great weekend ladies and thanks for your support.

Bickers xxxx


----------



## daisy-may

Bickers thinking of you hon xxx 


lots love xx daisy xx


----------



## Bickers

Thanks Daisy    What gorgeous Twinnies you have.

I saw my consultant on Friday.  He says I should go again as soon as possible.  He agreed I need another Laparoscopy, which he wants to do himself.  He will completely prep me for an IVF cycle, whereas the doc who did my last Laparoscopy just removed the endo.

We could go again as early as next month!!  I will let you know what happens.....

Bickers xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
Lots of luck with lap. Tell us how it goes..
Talk soon.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Monkeymoo

hi all tentatively joining you and hoping i'm in the right place. Ds 10mth old conceived ivf. Unex fert and no funds for tx i think nhs will just offer iui.Just seeing what happens for now, stopped taking the pill so we're not trying not to have a baby' . Have doubts that it's too soon but also worried about leaving it too late and regretting not trying.


----------



## Bickers

Hi Monkeymoo,

Welcome aboard   

Bickers xxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Bickers sorry to here your new. Glad things are going to move forward quickly. When do you think they will do the lap?

Kuki hope all is going well for you plans to start tx again.

Monkeymoo welcome, i understand what you mean about not being sure how long to leave it till you try for a second child. I was ready to go agin when my son was a year old but DH was not sure so we agreed we would try when our DS was 18 months, however it took us until august this year to actually start tx due to doing all the test again and the fact i have irregular periods.

Well ladies i have not been checking with you a lot as I am not in a good place at the moment. We have our consultation with new doctor last week Tuesday and have not heard anything about our blood results as of yet they said they would write to us. If nothing comes in the post today i will have to give them a call Tuesday or Wednesday to find out what is happening. We have decided to go for another round of ivf and see if i develop any eggs but we need to wait and see what doctor is advising us to do. I am on melatonin and inositol tablets as they are meant to help with improving egg quality this was avised by doctor so we will have to see what happens. I would like to go for tx again before xmas but so just waiting to see what report says.  I know what i have to do but just feel confussed think their is a lot going on in my head and feel angry at the moment so i need to sort my self out before doing any tx.

Kamie xx


----------



## Bickers

Kamie     I hope they come back to you soon and you manage to sort it out.  Do let us know what happens.

Bickers xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
I know how you feel abot not being in the right place. I am trying to get rid of the whole tx living but it has been so very difficult. 
Hoping you get your phone call very soon and will help you to plan things out.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Monkeymoo

nothing worse than waiting for results big hugs.
Hope everyone's doing ok, 
I'm plodding along trying not to get sucked into the whole baby making thing but i can feel myself cracking already imagining myself pg again, baby names, etc etc 
Daft question .... Does anyone know if there are any side effects when you stop taking the pill? I feel like i've got major pmt and could quite happily punch someone. Everything is winding me up this week


----------



## Kuki2010

MonkeyMoo,
Stoping pill will affect all hormons so all very normal to feel like you are.. Try to take it easy..
I am waiting for my AF to arrive so I can be on the pill. Have not been on it since I started my TX journey in 2006.
Fun and games eyh..
Wishing you lots of luck.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
You are all so quiet. Hope it is all well with you all?
No AF for me. 12days late. And I am not pregnant no.
Going to muck up all my plans for Reprofit treatment. I don't want to be cycling so close to Christmas.
Might have to leave till Jan.. Lets see when it turns up.
Love.
Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki you poor thing it's about time things went right for you   2012 is your year xxxx


----------



## KG

Kuki, still thinking about you, hun. Typical AF not to show up, just when you need her. Stay positive, I'm keeping everything crossed that 2012 will be your year.

Kxx


----------



## Kuki2010

SP,
Thank you hun. I hope so.. 2011 was an awful year. Such a hard work and full of with heartaching days.
You enjoying DD? Enjoy and just enjoy..

KG,
Thanks hun. You are nearly there. A few more weekds.. Hanging in there. 
I think I will do one more fresh cycle with my own eggs and immune drugs and take some time off from it all. Maybe just a couple of years or so.. And go back to it with all donor embryoes. I am just so tired with it.

Sending you all lots of love.
Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Kuki

Sorry to hear things not going to plan. I know what you mean about doing tx so close to Christmas. I do not want to be having to take it easy around Christmas as i want my son to start enjoying the festive season.

I am now in a Better place  i did not get my report back from the clinic until Friday 21st Oct so i waited 3 weeks for a one paragrah letter. Any way i called the clinic so discuss having another round of TX i was expecting them to say we had to wait until the new year, but she asked when my AF is due and we can start then. I have been put on a short protocol which i have not done before and i am taking different drugs to last time.  On the injections as well as two different tablets one for 5 days and one for 28 days. The plan is to really stimulate me so i hopefully get some eggs this time. 

I have Been to my GP and have been offered counselling, free on the NHS which again has happened fast i start this week, hopefully it keeps me relaxed and focused through TX.

I am due to start my AF on 8th i have a feeling it will be late,  have told told the  clinic this is very likely for me so they booked me provisionally for that week.l

Hope your AF has arrived...

What protocol will you be on Kuki?


Wishing you all the best, stay positive, thinking of you.

Kamie x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Kamie,

Since my Dd's birth I have been cycling around christmas and since than we had some awful christmas. Except the first one. Which was just amazing.

This christmas is going to extra difficult with my SIL is having her second child. I reacted really badly to her pregnancy not sure how I will cope with the baby.. 

Still no AF so I am going to cancel the cycle. ET will be around 23-24th of dec. Too late. So I will cycle in Jan. 

Come to my protocol. Will be SP first time ever. But I asked for it. I want to be on a little drugs possible to create around 6-7 eggs and have 3-4 embies for transfer. I am not bothered with any FETs. It just does not work for me. I will be on all immune drugs, blood thinners, ABs and Valtex. And maybe thyroid meds if need be.

Great that you have offered counciling. I have not done any. I have been down quiet abit with all the fighting. I don't want that to registered in my file. Just in case we apply for adoption in our out of country in the future.

So glad you are in a better place. I wish I was able to say that too. But working on it. Got a few tasks outstanding and geting me down. Will tactle those this week and hopefully AF will come and will make me feel really better. Lets see..

Wishing you a great week. One more week close to our dream. Lets stay positive.

Love. Kukixx


----------



## georgia2

Hi Everyone


Looking for somewhere to post and thought this might be the place.
Started monitoring last week for our final cycle- using our remaining two frosties and then closing the door on IVF.
Can't face doing this again. Can't not do it again.
Can't wait for it to be over. Am so afraid of it being over.
Anyone else feel like this?


----------



## Kuki2010

Georgia,
I feel exactly the same. So so fed up with the whole treatments living but at the same time still so so desperate to have more kids. The urge is still so huge!
I don't know how we are going to cope with this and how and when can move on without a massive heartache.
I cannot concentrate on anything. My life has ben on hold for 5 years.. 
We just have to take one day at the time. I so try..
How are you today?

Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## Loopy Loo

Hello my lovely ladies....

Sorry i have been AWOL for so long but i have a good reason..... I am 11 weeks pregnant!! cannot believe it still! I found out on 19th Sep and since then I have been suffering from Hypremisis again and have been in hospital at 7 weeks and still being sick off and on but much much better than i was, at one point i could not even get my head off the pillow without being sick. 
anyway feeling a little better now as am on anti sickness medication 3 times a day and wanted to check in and see how you are all doing.
cannot believe after all the pills and injections it bloody happened whilst i was off treatment! 

Kuki - 2012 will be your year i am sure of it xxx
Sleepy - congrats on your little girl xx

hello to everyone else, i see there is a different thread that i need to go on now but i will keep popping back as dont want to let you all go as you have been such a support over the last year xxxx

Lou
xxx


----------



## georgia2

Thanks Kuki
I see that your last treatment with own eggs and sperm is planned for Jan. Have you made this decision? Is it the advice of your clinic to use donor eggs for future cycles?
I relate to your remark about life being on hold. I very much feel like that. I used to feel optimistic and even be able to think about he benefits of the treatment being over, even if he outcome isn't what we want. However, the treatment has left me so depleted, I have no optimism or energy left and worry how I'm going to be when this is all over. Very negative, I know.
Hello to everyone else on the thread.


----------



## KG

Loopy, many, many congratulations! So sorry to hear you have been so ill, though, I hope it gets easier for you soon.

Kx


----------



## daisy-may

oh my goodness Lou !!!!!!!!!!!          


love and luck daisy xxxxx


----------



## sabah m

wow Loo that is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!! Congratulations!!! You need to change your signature now    


I will start final FET Feb / March time.  BMI where it needs to be, marriage counselling done, and we in much better place for a new baby!  Just need the new baby now


----------



## KG

Sabah, lovely to hear from you and glad that things have worked themselves out!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Loo,
Can not belive you keep that quiet!!! What a wonderful news so happy for you!!!!
I hope the sickness will get better soon. Yes please coem and see us.. We are still here and still struggling.. We do need all the support we can get.  

Sabah,
Glad it is all coming together. Let me know when you want to meet up.. Love to see you both.  

Georgia,
I used to be the most positve and energetic person in the whole wide world. Now just down and quiet.. 
Living with TX.. Awful just awful. Not sure if I ever go back to normal self.
So far none of the docs told me anything negative about mye ggs. All they say they are great. We do have great embies and nothing. They don't implant. So many reasons for it. Which I am working on but not sure how long more I can take.. Not easy...  

My period is here. So glad. Feel so much better but tonight we have to make the decision regarding when we ae going to cycle. Waiting for DH to arrive so we talk. It would have been nice to not to think about any tx things this time around. Last year was awful. I had my m/c on boxing day. My baby should ahve been 3 months this week. 

Sending lots of love.. 
We got to stay positive.. I know so hard but we have to keep on trying.. 

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Loopy Congratulations see you on the other thread

Sabah I was thinking about you the other day, so glad you have worked through things and are  having another bash

Kuki Hope you and DH have reached a decision

SP
x


----------



## daisy-may

kuki .... any decisions ??


daisy x


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

Georgia, I understand how you feel. I have only had one round of treatment since the birth of my son and this second one may be my last one if they do not retrieve any eggs this time. I am so scared of doing treatment again as I do not want my dreams of having another child to be over. we have had discussions about egg donors and i am not sure if that is the path for us, we have decided to go ahead with this next round of ivf short protocol which is a first for us and should it not work then really discuss egg donation, but it does not sit comfortably with me at present.

Kuki, have you had a chance to sit with DH and chat about when to start tx? i know it is difficult when you have family of friends who are pregnant with second child. our best friends are pregnant with their second child and due in January, we were pregnant together last time so the pressure feels like it is on now. every one keep asking me when i will be having our second so my new response to people is " when god gives us a child" my DH thinks it is so funny but i feel like it is the truth. We have been meeting up with our friends so much recently and all everyone wants to talk about is when the baby comes and how having two children will be difficult. I am happy for them but also hurting so much as i wanted it to be us who had our second child before our other friends.

Sabah, hope 2012 is the year for you! 

loopy loo, congratulations, sorry to hear you have not been feeling well.

Well I am know waiting for AF to arrive so i can start TX next week. Have just called the clinic to confirm we are booked in next week and have been told i am booked in daily for 8 am so we just have to wait for AF . I am finding the new hospital difficult to deal with as i am so used to the doctor we had before who and i do not like change, but on the other hand i am excited about doing a short protocol, and being on different drugs to all my previous cycles.
I had my first counselling session this week and since then I keep making DH laugh as i have become assertive.Not sure how counselling will work out with hospital appointments and times so I think i will have to take everything as it comes.

wishing everyone the best at what ever stage you are at. 

Kamie xx


----------



## Monkeymoo

kamie that's a lovely response. I get asked a lot about when we're having number two but these people either don't know or have forgotten we had ivf. It reminds me of before tx when i was asked if i wanted or when i'd be having children. Laughing it off and acting as if i didn't felt so wrong as if i was jinxing myself but i just couldn't think if any other way to reply.
Hope everyones ok. Nothing to report here af due this week but early days for me as this'll be my first proper af since stopoing the pill so now i'll be able to keep an eye on dates etc


----------



## eibhlin

Hope it's okay to say hello   I've been lurking your thread and the last few comments made me smile as we're also dealing with second babies issue with friends who seem to have forgotten our previous experiences at the moment   

It is such a relief to read other people going through similar experiences as I'm feeling a bit out of it tbh.

I'm blessed with a lovely 11 month old son, and am a bit befuddled as we got a bfn from fet yesterday.  During the 2ww we had three pregnancy announcements from close friends and family!  Am delighted for them but feeling a bit useless and haven't  told anyone about tx as they don't really understand or know how to help or respond.  It's bloody lonely this whole thing!  And I don't want any of it to affect DS either.

Anyway you seem like a really nice bunch of ladies so hope you don't mind me popping in to say hi!


----------



## rachel1972

hello ladies 

just wanted to indroduce myself, i am going to be cycling next year around feb/march i hope would do it now but dh destroyed is sperm as he thought we wouldnt be doing this again, but we are hopfully I want to do a natural IVF as i cant bear the idea of frosties again and the drugs and all.

So shold be able to go to clinics in the new year and start the ball rolling.  

look foward to getting to know you all x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,

Yes decision made. Dh can only take time off in December. And we are going to cycle than. Should be around 10-11th dec ET date. Well I am waiting for the exact dates from Dr. He said he will send it to me as soon as he can.

I am more excited than scared now. Lets see what happens.

I will be taking a lot of different drugs this time.. Going to be full on again. 

I have got pregnant 3 times in my 4 fresh cycle. Hoping this one will catch the healthy baby.. Lets wait and see.

Lots of love and luck to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, I am keeping everything crossed that this will be the one for you.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Dearest KG,
I hope so hun I hope so.. 
You are nearly there.. 7 more weeks? Are you having c sec?
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, I'm not sure yet - saw the consultant for my hernia yesterday, but pretty useless really, so waiting to see the obstetrician in a couple of weeks. How's lovely DD? Have you sorted out school places for next year? We have to start choosing next week, easy really, it'll just be the village school. I'd find it much more difficult if we were still in Herts, with all the choice and competition for places.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Dear KG,
I thought they would do c sec and hornia operation at the same time. It just makes sense no?
Oh for schools it is a nightmare. We bought our little flat 7 years ago thinking if we can not move our kids will go to a lovely school. Well in that school in Lara's year which is next sep there are 19 sibbilings so we will be fighing for 11 places only. There is only 420metres door to door. But you never know. We will have to get Lara to private school if she cannot go there. Which means I have to go back to work asap. We have to apply for the space in janurary in here. And we will find out a lot later in the year that we will find out if we have got in or not. There is another good government school in Radlett. We will put that as second choice but that is it. The rest are all private. We do not want to go to schools in Shenley or Borehmwood.
It is all such a worry. Timing is prety crap really but we said we take the risk and we try to get her to school if not we have to fight her to get into Aldenham or Habedashers.. All very challenging.. There is huge waiting list for HBD.. 
Have a lovely wknd.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies,

How is everyone doing?

Kuki - hope this Christmas you get your dream, you deserve it. I am sure of all my dates yet, but i think we will be cycling together. I have been told i will start drugs CD 2 so not sure when EC and et will be. It sounds like you have a lot going on over the next few months so difficult making sure everyones needs are met when thinking about TX. 

Rachel- good luck with everything and hope 2012 is your year.

Eibhlin- i know how you feel, i keep wondering how tx affects DS, he seems to get every clingy just before we start TX, in september he would call out for me all the time and now he is asking for my hand and wants me to sit with him all the time, however on the whole he has become independent and as he attends nursery three days a week he will have some continuity while we are having TX. I think that is why we placed ds in nursey when we started the ball rolling. I have not told any friends about when we start TX as they just do not know what to say and i feel as though they do not understand

Monkeymoo - try not to stress and hope it does not take long before you get a bfp. It is so difficult knowing what yo say to people, when i tell people i am a stay at home mum and my son goes to nursery 3 days a week, they look at me and say oh aw omen of leisure. I just want to say you do not know what we are going through so do not judge me. I know i am luck to be able to send my son to nursery so when i am going through TX i have time to rest, but it is also because last time i got pregnant i was on three weeks bed rest so we have had to plan ahead.

Well it is a waiting game for me until AF arrives and i have my appointment with the clinic then i will know my dates but the clinic did say about four Weeks from beginning to end so it will be a full on month. Never done the short protocol before so do worry.

Kamie x x


----------



## KG

Kamie, your post struck a chord with me - I'm a stay at home mum too and ds was in nursery for three days throughout our tx. I don't know how we would have managed if he wasn't, practically terms of going to appoimentments and emotionally too - for me and him. I know others do manage, esp some of the lovely ladies on this board, but still I felt I should be justifying myself to other mums locally who don't know about our tx.

Kuki, fingers crossed hernia stop being a problem when baby arrives, so perhaps no op needed. The school
thing is so hard - yet another time when we worry about whether we're doing the right thing! 

Kx


----------



## Monkeymoo

is there anything we don't worry about lol 
Hi everyone hope you're having a good weekend and enjoying the fireworks. Af arrived this morning but feeling ok about it. Been out shoping all day with my sister and now laid on sofa with dog as i'm shattered. Would go to bed but dh decided while i was out he'd wash the quilt and beddung so waiting for it to dry


----------



## Kuki2010

Kg,
It is a such a worry. Lara is a very emotional and extra sensitive girly. Like me and daddy. So it is a worry. I have to say kids out there very very harsh creatures.. Lara do strugle. We manage to make fiends with one girl will be going to the school and another one a smashing little boy had to go to other school in the village. So friends wise we should be okay. It is so so difficult.
So glad to know you wont need an op to correct hernia. When you are having your meeting for birht plan?

Kamie,
So glad we will sharing dates and supporting each other. Where are you cycling? Dr. Stepan at Reprofit send me my dates last night. Now I am so so scared. We will be flying 6th of Dec. And ET should be 12/13th dec. On tuesday I will book everything. 
Wishing you lots and lots of luck.. Lets hope we have the very best of chrismas ever..

Love to youall.

Kukixx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,

I know a few of you lovely ladies from the last time I was posting...last year. I have been very quiet as had to give ttc a rest for some time as I've had a prolapsed disc for more than a year and had surgery 5 weeks ago. I am really feeling like I need some company now..

I have had a few fertility related downs recently. My DD's best friends were handily all also only children but at exactly the same time they are going to become siblings. My childminder and also my best "Mum" friend are having babies early next year, one of the girls I manage, the manage of DD's nursery and a couple of others I know. This has all hit me pretty hard...pleased for them but devastated at the thought of DD being lonely and then guilty at even daring to want another as I know how lucky I already am...  Can't win can we?... Also am in a world of constant baby / child / parenting talk and complete strangers always asking why I don't want another! Grrrrr...

Frustrated especially as consultant told us Sept 2010 to hurry up as my egg quality was diminishing and now more than a year later we still haven't been able to give it a go due to my back probs. Now I've had surgery and am in recovery I have to hope and pray I can get off the PK's so we can give it another go in the New Year (if I have any eggs left that is!)

Also DD asks all the time for a sibling and tells complete strangers we want another baby and have to pray to Jesus! That's often a little awkward but also really upsets me.

I am nearly 39 and really feel time is running out....

  xx


----------



## Kuki2010

RJS,
Lovely to hear from you. 
Glad operation went well and you are getting better.
You are only 39. Come on still plenty time. You can complete  your family. I know it is very very hard but we can do it. We have to try for sure and if we still end up with only one child we shall enjoy ourlives.
You get yourself in a great position to try in 2012. I am sure we shall be celebrating again..
We are always here to chat.. About anyting..
Sending lots of love and luck..
Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

hi rjs - my heart goes out too you , i feel the same.  hope you make full recovery quickly and get on it next year. lots of luck rachel x


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

I thought i would come on as feeling rubbish today DS has become clingy and crying a lot i keep feeling he is picking up on my stress and he is at a difficult age now as he is 2 years and 3 months old and is now saying no, telling me what he wants to eat and what he wants to do. I think i am just tired as i have been getting up early as ds is waking up at 5.30am at moment and still witing for af to arrive so i can start tx. 

I am cycling in highgate with a dr gadhir, he is nice and he has been the one to do all my ec and et to date and this is the first time he is treating me from begining to end. I have pcos and he has written a lot on the matte so i am hoping this time I will get the eggs i need to get to transfer.  At present i am calling the hospital every morning around 7 am to say if my af has arrive or not because i start all the drugs on cd 2. I have the 8 am slot books so when af arives i do not have to try and get an appointment. I think this is good but stress full as i feel rubbish calling every morning to say nothing has happened.

I am laying in bed while typing this on my tablet as i though resting and trying to destress may get af going.

Sorry i have been going on today, just feel low.

Kuki -


----------



## kamie

Sorry some how message got posted just as i was doing personels.

Kuki have you managed to book your flights and get everything organised? When do you start taking the drugs?  stay positive       

Rjs your story has touched me, i hope you 2012 is the year for all your dreams to Come true.

Kg thank for your message it did make me feel better as i felt i was the only one with a child in nursery and keep feeling guilty. How you feeling?

Take care everyone 

Kamie x x x


----------



## KG

Kamie, the nursery thing will get easier, ds is almost 4, and since he turned 3, it seems be more common for LOs to be at nursery or preschool at least a couple of days a week, and I think that is when I stopped feeling like the 'odd one out'. I'm good today, thanks - finally came back from a midwife appt with nothing new to worry about! Sending you hugs, 5.30am starts are horrible.

RJS, hoping things go well for you - sounds like a tough year.

Kx


----------



## eibhlin

Hi ladies,

Kamie - I'm really sorry you're having a tough time   It's just too much at times, isn't it!  And fractured sleep is just the icing on the cake.  My DS is in creche two days a week and even though my heart strings get tweaked, he really loves being around the other babas plus it gives us a bit of personal space during the TX (well when the days fell on the right days IYKWIM!).  Hopefully AF arrives to end the rubbishy phone calls!     

RJS - I'm sorry about your back and the delays.  Your DS sounds adorably innocent chatting away about your personals to all and sundry   I really hope you get started on the TX and that your DS's prayers are answered!

KG - great news that you had such a positive appointment!

Kuki - here's hoping for a great Christmas present for you and your family     

AFM I told two close friends about our recent failed TX which makes it more real.  It doesn't make it easier though!  Will probably have our review in early December and try again in late Jan.


----------



## Kuki2010

Oh Ladies,
I am so excited.
Booked flight is to Brno today.
Booked the flat in there too.
Next got to get the huge list of meds which I need about 2k.. Will do that next week once Dh's chqs clears my account.  

I am suppose to start all meds by 28th of nov latest. Can not wait.
So excited.. And still very very scared. 

Love to you all.
KUkixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

How is everyone?

I am still waiting for AF to arrive over a week so have been so anxious and low in mood as every morning i am still ringing clinic to say we will not be starting today. I know it will happen soon and i need to try and forget about it but for the last week i have done nothing not meet up with friends or called anyone just could not be bothered. Had counselling yestarday and has seemed to help i have been for coffee this morning and yestarday sta,rted to clean out my sons old clothes and toys and boxed them up.

I know life has to continue i do not seem to be taking things as well as my last cycles before i had my son. Not sure if this is because i know after this cycle if things do not work out i may never have my family of four.

Kuki, where are you at know with everthing? How you feeling? Sorry not much of a cycle buddy at present.
I saw from your last reply that everthing is booked how exciting. I did not realise that your clinic was in brno, have been out there once  with work was asked to be a guest speaker at a drug and alcohol training event, thought it was a nice place and found people so friendly.

Well hoping i will have some new soon and then i am sure i will be moaning about side effects of drugs as not been on these drugs before.

Good luck to everyone and hope your dream come true.

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Kamie,
I went and got my drugs yesterday except one. Neupegan. Can not find any but hoping to get some closer to EC.
I have 5 days of bcp left. Than will be like you waiting for AF to turn up. Got to be on latest on 28th. 27th will be perfect. 
Yes we are going to Reprofit. And going to be my first time. Really looking forward to it. Suppose to be a great city and lovely people.
I had my thyroid results and found out I have massive issues with that too. Started the levothyroxine today and gave me bad tummy.
I feel awful when I look at the 3 huge begs of drugs I will be using in next 4 weeks.. My poor body.. 
This is a totally madness.
My last treatment I think.. I won't do this again.. I don't want to get cancer and die early.. Without enjoying my precious daughter.. 
We got to draw the line some how some time..
I am always around.. Just come here and share..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
How are you all doing?
This week i will be on AF watch. Can not stand it.. But should be here on saturday. See how difficult it will be this time.
Wishing you all a great week.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,

Firstly thanks so much all of you for your supportive posts in reply to mine. I had forgotten how lovely everyone on here is.   

Kuki - How exciting that everything is booked. I will do an AF dance for you.    How is your gorgeous DD? I know what you mean about madness! And about the meds. I have been on painkillers for over a year now so I worry about the effect that has...

Kamie - Hope your AF arrives soon also. Must be tough having to make that call every day. This IF lark doesn't half take over doesn't it? Even if we try not to let it. Thinking of you. xx

Eibhlin - It always makes it seem more real telling people about tx....hope your friends are supportive. xx

KG - Hope you are taking some time to rest a little! xx

Rachel - Thanks for your kind words.

Well AFM...I got signed off for another 10 days to DH, DD and I booked a sneaky week to Lanzarote for a week in the sun! Had a glorious time; just what we needed and it defo was good for my back and my stress levels. Sadly AF was 5 days late which meant I ended up taking a pg test which was negative and that was a bad day. I just get so frustrated that we have to go through this every month....even though the chances of conceiving naturally are so paper thin I can't help but hope (a teensy weeny bit.) But we had a lovely holiday.

Sad to be back! Got the consultant this afternoon and if he gives me the all clear I will be back at work 4 days a week from Mon. I still have some back pain and so I am hoping he can reassure me about that.

Got upset last night when DH said we should sell DD's cotbed (we are buying her a cabin bed.) It just breaks my heart that we can't just know we will need it again. Also, have booked a Crimbo meal with about 10 girls who I know through having DD...all of whom have had baby no 2 or are pg. I can't help but feel a little left out....

DD is very excited about Christmas and I am taking her to see Santa at the Rainforest Cafe in London on Sat so that will be lovely. 

Hope everyone is having a good week.
xx


----------



## rachel1972

rjs that sounds lovey to go away for a week, i know how you feel with the being left out of baby no 2 but i think its so nice to stay in touch with the people from birth of no 1 , i have not really managed that as the group found the situation with my sons behaviour differcult and it wasnt really sorted out (he has sensory processing disorder we no now), really hopw your back gets sorted soon xx


----------



## Kuki2010

RJS,
DD is growing so fast and a total darling. I am so lucky to have her. She is my treasure.
Thank you so much for AF dancing.. Still no sign of it.
I hope from now on is all up for you.. Stay happy and content.. 

Rachel,
My god twins has CP. And it is not easy to do anything with other kids. So I can imagine. 
They are IVF twins. And was born at 31 weeks. Incompetent uterus problem. 
My DD is great with them..

Okay I have to and do some work.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies,
Thanks for all your kind words.

Af did arrive and i started tx on sunday with the first of many injections and tablets. I decided to keep myself busy for the first two days so arranged lots of activities with my ds. I have been meaning to come on and talk to you all and tell you the good news but i think with things getting cancelled last time i am a bit scared and could not face another cancelled tx. In my heart i am so postive and feel this time it will work but who knows. I am booked in for my day 6 scan tomorrow morning at 7.30am in highgate. When we saw our doctor last week friday he did say that if my e2 levels drop then he will cancel tx, also this time he wants me to have 20 good sized follicules so he is planning on pushing me to my limits. I feel okay, drinking my pint of milk and 2 liters of water, i am a vegetarian so am eatting lots of nuts and pulses.i  wonder how much of this really works but i will do anything at present.

Kuki i hope your af arrives on time and things go smoothly for you and your family  

Rjs glad you managed to get away, lanzarote is nice we went there back in march and we had a great time. Are you back at work from monday? 

Rachel hope things are well with you.

Well ladies i will let you all know how scan goes in the morning.
Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Great to know AF has arrived and all going well so far. Good luck for the scan. 
Will be thinking of you. Come and here and let us know how it is all going.
Love.Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Kuki

Feel bloated and having some aces and pains been told to take things easy.

We had the scan and all is looking good so far. I have 5 follicles ranging from 16 - 14 from what i can remember. I have one follicle that is 25 and one that was very small so he thinks that these two will be no good. It looks like going with my own cycle has not produced lots of follicles but they are all growing at the same rate which i have not had before. on the right side all the follicles are 16 and on the left they are all around 14 so hoping that is a good sign to getting some eggs.

when i fell pregnant with my son i only had one egg and that was not a good grade but it worked so i am hoping if i get to transfer i have more of a chance for things to work. I remember last time being on 2 weeks bed rest and only working for 4 hours during my first 12 weeks i am not sure what i would do this time as i have my son.

I think i am anxious and scared today as i do not know if we will get to egg collection and if we have any eggs.

I have to stay focused and positive but i think this afternoon once my son has gone to MIL I will have a cry as I need one and get everything out of my system.

Well I am booked in on Monday for another scan and bloods if all is okay with my bloods today and next week we aim for egg collection to be on Wednesday or Thursday.   

How are you doing today?

love Kamie xx


----------



## sabah m

Haven't even started tx and got a bill for storage of embryos, £260....arrrggghhh!!!


Kuki....any progress?


Hi to everyone else!


I am poorly, finally on antibiotics after 10 days of a mutant cold.  Am also meant to be going to India on Thursday for a mission trip with my church, to visit an orphanage and distribute blankets in slums but visa delayed so not sure I will make it, adding to my anger of delaying tx past my 38th bday!


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Darlings,
AF arrived this morning. I am over the moon. First ever for me.
I will go with my dates. I am going to start my injections tomorrow. I am so excited.
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki you are a brave lady good luck hunny x

Sabah hope you are feeling better   for you once you get started.

xxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

How is everyone?

Well i have another appointment today and this morning we were told not to take the menopaur however as my dh is struggling with night shift he got my injections ready and gave them to me then realised the mistake, so we rang the clinic and they said okay. I am so scared now already have a fear things are getting cancelled, also i am high risk for over stimulating. I just feel low and as though their are a lot of negatives. 

I just want my dream not to be over. 

Love kamie x x


----------



## kamie

Hi All

I have got back from my appointment and things are looking good. We are booked in for EC on Wednesday morning early so we take the pregnal tonight at 8pm. Had bloods done Again today so hoping they come back okay with no issues.

After this mornings mishaps i feel less stress but the clinic did not think any thing of it.

I know pray for eggs do not think i could take another round of no eggs. 
My scan shows 8 follicles 5 of them ranging from 19 to 20.5 which looks good. I am tried and my stomach is so bloated and today feeling sick like i could not eat anything.

Kuki how are you? Have you started your meds. I am praying for you.

Sabah hope you feel better soon and visa situation sorts it self out.

Love kamie x x


----------



## sabah m

Hi kamie


Big    for you scare of earlier....so glad its not a big issue and all going well in preparation for EC.      all goes better than expected and you have your fat juicy eggs waiting for when you wake up....are you being sedated?


My visa got granted so feeling really relieved, emotionally exhausted too!  Don't have passport back yet but they have assured me I will have it back in time!  Had agreed with DH to start tx next month as was so upset about India but knew using tx to make me feel better was not the best start!!  My sister found out she is having a boy today.  My boy will have a boy cousin to play with, makes the sting of him being an only child a little less stingy!


Love to all xxxx


----------



## eibhlin

Hey ladies

sabah, great news about your visa and congrats on the news of a nephew
kamie, fab news about the follies, really positive after the scare     fingers and toes crossed for EC

RJS v jealous of your well deserved trip, sounds heavenly! (and sunny - roll on the summer!) hope the back's a bit better

Kuki, hope you getting on well with being a human pin-cushion   I still get DH to do mine (am a wuss!)

Sleepypenguin, Rachel1972, KG, hope you (and anyone else I've missed) are keeping well   

AFM it's DS's 1st birthday tomorrow!  Cakes are baked (okay I lie, bought   )  Ah to think this time a year ago I was in the hospital crushing DH's hand and trying to remember the hypnosis meditations whilst constantly requesting the epidural LOL!

He's such a joy, I want to get him out of the cot for a cuddle but am too tired to move!


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
5 follies.. great sizes. Good luck for wed! I have started all the meds on sunday. Yesterday was 1st night of injections. Went okay.

Sabah,
Glad you are going to make it to your trip. Enjoy. Will be an emotional one.

Eibhlin,
I used to pay for a nurse to do mine but since 6th treatment I am doing them except Gestone. They are hell ones. Will get them done in Brno.

Love ot you all.

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi all 

Well we have done it. Got to EC today and have 3 eggs DH sperm was good so now is a waiting game to see if they fertilize over night.   we get to et which will be Friday if all goes well.

How are you feeling Kuki, hope injections are not making you feel to rubbish.

Thank you everyone for all your support and lovely messages. I will responded to all when i am not so sleepy.

Kamie x x


----------



## KG

kamie, wishing you loads of luck - hoping that all goes well for Friday.

Kuki, good news that AF turned up in time. Keeping fingers crossed for you, hun.

Sabah, glad that visa got sorted. Hoping you get to start tx when the time is right.

Ladies, I don't post much, but am always thinking about you and sending positive thoughts your way.

Kx


----------



## Monkeymoo

good luck and lots of baby dust to all you lady's cycling at the minute
Hi and hugs to everyone else
As usual nothing to report here. Me, dh and lo full of cold. So been a few sleepless nights and snotty noses


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Good luck for friday. Rest nicely for darling embies.

KG,
Thank you hun. All going well in here.. Getting excited.

Sabah,
Haveyou gone yet/

Monkeymoo, 
Thank you.. We had awful colds and recovering. The ABs are working nicely. Take extra care.

I have a huge pile of ironing to do this morning. And have done nothing yet.. Should get on. Yuck.
Mxxx


----------



## kamie

Thanks for all the luck. We have had phone call to say all three eggs are doing well and become embrios and will be put back tomorrow. Now waiting for phone call to tell me what time. So excited and scared at the same time just meditating right now and will pop out later for fresh air as, as of tomorrow i will be resting and putting myself first. Phoned DH this morning to tell him the news and the excitement in his voice has made my day.

Hugs and prays to all of you. Take care of yourselves and remain positive.

Kuki glad all is going well.

Monkeymoo stay positive,  hope you feel better soon.

Eibhlin hope ds's birthday went well. 

KG thanks for all the postive thoughts.


Love KAMIE x x


----------



## eibhlin

Hey all, 

Kamie - that's great news, keeping everything crossed for you and the wee embies, hopefully next time you post you'll be pupo!      

Kuki - hope the snuffles are better and the ironing is done (by someone else preferably!)

Monkeymoo - likewise, hope the colds are clearing!

KG - good to hear from you hope your keeping well! 

AFM Brill birthday for DS, and we went to see santa yesterday, great fun.  Still waiting for the AF after our FET (bled from 5dpt but now on day 32 post FET... and keep thinking 'maybe, just maybe...'  yeah right, as if!!!   AAAAAH the little bit of 'hope' drives me bonkers, you'd think I'd be used to the AF waiting game by now


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Hope ET went well?

Eibhlin,
My AF first time ever on time. Hope yours turn up soon.

I am so busy. Not sure if I am coming or going.. Got all my drugs with me now.. 
Will pack today all. So I should feel more in control at the end of day.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## cohensmummy

hi ladies,

im not sure if im in the right place or not   but if i tell you a bit about me would some1 please let me know

im a very proud mum to my little miracle cohen-arlie who was born in aug2010 after our first attempt of ivf. i am now going through our second round of ivf with the hope of getting our little mr a little sister or brother  had ec on wed and got 6 eggs of which 5fertilized and are now hoping for a 5day transfer on monday.

i know i may sound selfish so excuse me if i do but this time around i almost feel more desperate for it to work  not due to the money or anything silly like that but basically as last time my heart was set on wanting to know what feeling a bump, a baby move inside and to give birth to my own child would be like. this time i know all these feeling but i also know the over welming love you get as soon as you get a bfp and see your little bump grow into the most wonderful gift ever to bless ya. 

is there any ladies on here who have been so lucky to of got a bfp on both 1st attempts??

look forward to speaking to you all and sorry for the rant  xx

laura xx


----------



## rachel1972

Laura you are in the right place i know exactly what you mean about knowing how great the whole pregnancy is not just the end result of a baby.  Good luck , keep us updated you are young and obviously fertile so why not have 2 sucessful goes fx f or you


----------



## KG

Laura, welcome to the thread! Please don't think that you are selfish to want to do it all again. If we had no trouble getting pregnant it wouldn't be an emotion that we'd even think about when trying for number two. I had ds on my first ever IUI, and did get a bfp from my first go ttc no2, but sadly miscarried. However, it did give me hope that it could happen again. I had to wait til my 3rd go to get lucky again!

Wishing you lots of luck with this cycle.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
My scan went well. 15 folies. First ever this numer. Highest was 13 with my DD's cycle. 6-7 big ones the rest are small.
Lining is 7.4. All good to go.
Brno here we come.. Be ready!
I am on all the meds. Dr. Gorgy wants me to see 28th of dec if we are lucky enough to get to BFP but I am not sure. I would rather see him in new year for my scan and more immune drugs. 

Laura,
Lets hope you will be lucky for second time.. Nothing selfish about it.. All so very normal.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## KG

Fab news, Kuki,

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you K.
It has been a very emotionally charge days. SIL gave birth to a little boy today. Best friend gave birht to another gorgeous boy yesterday. I will go see him tomorrow. 
I am hopeful that next year some day will be sharing the amazing feeling again.
You are so close too.
Thinking of you..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi All

Laura - welcome there is nothing selfish with wanting another child. I have not had any first time successes with TX however, it happens to many women.  good luck with monday,  that this is your time.    

Kuki brilliant news so happy for you. You will be like all thoughs having their second child  soon.   

Well had et on Friday went well with no complications, can not believe on two week wait, have to ring clinic in 12 days to book in for blood test, i never tested at home last time so i will try to resist, but who knows. I have been in bed resting since i got home yestarday and strict instructions no lifting my ds.  this is our time staying positive.

Love kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
You are PUPO!... Enjoy.. Just chill.
I will be just behind you.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

wow lots of exciting news on this thread....Kamie, congrats on being PUPO!!!     for excellent news at the end!!


Kuku so pleased about your follies, when is EC due?


Here's hoping for a wonderful miraculous christmas for us all


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
EC should be friday if all goes well. ET should next tuesday. Wednesday we come home..
Can not wait..
I am doing all I can do.. I can not do anything else. Today I had ints..  Abit sore on my hand but should be okay for tomorrow.
Tomorrow we fly and I still have billions thing to do.
How are you?
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, wishing you all the luck in the world. Will be thinking of you.

Kxx


----------



## kamie

Hi kuki

Wishing you all the best hope it all goes well. Good luck!  

                 

Love kamie x x


----------



## sabah m

I have exciting news, consultation next monday and hope to start final FET January 2012!!!  Lets hope we all pregnant together xxxx


----------



## KG

Brilliant news, Sabah!

kamie, congrats on being PUPO! Hoping the 2ww passes quickly.

Kx


----------



## kamie

KG thanks, i am okay at the moment reading watching TV and taking it easy. I think by next week i will be pulling out my hair.

Sabah- great news! Where are u having TX?   2012 is your year.

Kamie x x


----------



## sabah m

Kamie....how are you coping with your LO?  Are you lifting/ not lifting?  My tx is with Shirley Oaks, then ET with Bridge Clinic, London, where was yours?  My mum is adament she will come stay with me for 2ww so i do nto have to do anything, more stress than itis worth!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
What a wonderful news.. Lets hope we all be preggers together. Wouldn't be so great...

Kg,
Thank you... I so need all the luck I can get..

Kamie,
Don't stress just relax. Don't lift anything including LO.. Just in case.. I have friend who lifted her 18th momths old up 5 floors everyday up and down and got pregnant with FET.. So if it will stick.. it will.. Just chill..

I am very nervous.. I di dnto sleep well. Must be all the injections too. And steriods. DD's birhtday today. I hope the morning goes well at the clinic so we can really enjoy the day.
Brno looks so lovely.. Flat is just great. We could ask anythng better.. Blue sky.. Sun is shining.. Just stunning.. What a day.

Love to you all. My dear friends..
Kukixx


----------



## KG

Awww, happy birthday to DD, Kuki!

Kx


----------



## kamie

Hi 

Kuki good luck with today. Hope DD has a good birthday. From what i remember of visting Brno desserts are nice and you can pick up a cake anywhere. Thinking of you and take care of yourselves.

Sabah i had my treatment  at a private hospital in Highgate,  it is a small centre but we are happy with what they have done for us this time around. Shirley oaks is that the private hospital in croydon? 

I was advised not to lift my DS by hopsital staff but they have giving me some advice which has worked. My DS will climb on to the bed himself and have a cuddle and we are doing  activities while either in bed or on the settee. I started a lot of chnages before TX for example taught ds to  climb in and out of the car himself using a step ( great advise i got from ladies on this here) also had told him mummy can not lift him as much so i used to get down to his hight and cuddle him. I have been lucky he does not ask me to lift him and now if i say shall i help you get on the bed he says "no mummy i do it"
He keeps telling me to be careful. I was worried but nursery have said he has become independent since i started TX.
I am lucky DS attends nursery and my in laws are helpping to pick him up and if my DH is out for the night they have him for the night. This means i am getting loads of time to rest and know DS is getting all the love and attention he needs.
I also think it is good bonding for him and DH as i have arranged some events at the weekend for both of them and they sem to be having lots of fun.

I am okay a bit tired today but have decided to rest as much as possible as this is what i did when i feel pregnant with DS so we have chosen to do the same. It is difficult as had a few comments from someone who is about to have second child saying i should just carry on as normal and that what their newfriends said should happen and they have been through ivf. DH tells me not to pay attention to them as we know our situation. I think staying away from a lot of people i can stay positive and that is what i need to do. Who knows what the outcome will be but as along as i can say i did everything i could.

Good luck to everyone. 

Love Kamie xx


----------



## sabah m

Hi Kamie

My DS only 2 months older than yours.

Like kuki said if it is going to stick it will stick, but my clinic said don't do anything you will regret later and cause you to think what if, or I shouldn't have done that.....so I agree with what you are doing, take as many precautions as possible and its great you have the support from family to be able to do that.  

What I worry most about is DS does love mummy to carry him about, sometimes even out of the car into nursery like this morning.....it breaks my heart to say no, probably coz i love it and love that I can still cuddle him like a baby!  I guess I will have to avoid taking him to nursery for the 2ww.    Last tx time he was still in the cot and DH ended up being away first week of 2ww (delays with tx!) DS was ill and I lifted him in and out of the cot often that week.....tx ended very badly that time  

Yes shirley oaks is croydon, have you heard of it?  Whereabouts are you?  I really like it there, its a very small clinic too, they still remember me every time I call, and my details which is nice.  And I know the the fertility nurses have given numerous appointments free rather than letting me see consultant to cut costs.  Just hope this time is the one that works!!

Kuki-happy birthday to dear Lara!!  better you are there enjoying the blue skies than here is the frost, its soooooo cold!!!  Hope those follies are getting big and juicy and that lining is thickening like it needs to to look after the precious cargo.  Thsi time next week you will be PUPO!!!!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good evening ladies,
Well this morning went well. Dr Stepan is a dashing one.. Gorgeous. But annoyed a lot with his resistance for 3 embies transfer. He says everything looks so great. He cannot risk me getting pregnant to triplets.. For god sake; I am 41 and it is my 8th go. I had my first 3 embies transfer when I was 36 and only 1 was okay to stick for the long haul.. I dont think I will ever be so lucky again.
Well my fight goes on for 3 emby transfer. He said we'll have the same conversation when we meet up for emby discussion. He said he might allow it if Ihave average embies.. If they are great ones, he will only put 2. He keep going about how little I am and if i get 3 implanted I will end up loosing them all etc.. 
Uterus is 10.5 already. Follies are looking great. More than 15 in there now but 5-10 are nice size. So lets see what happens. My aim was with lower dosage of Gonal-F to get about 6-7 good eggs. I really hope we are not going to lack on quality..
EC is on saturday morning. Tomorrow I will have my Ovitrelle shot at 9pm. 7.45 at the clinich on sat. Very early start but hopefully we will come to the flat and chill rest of the day.
We are going to see a friend of mine tomorrow. So it will be a day out for us.
We have decided againts going to Vienna after all. Dh thinks will be far too much for me.. I should just chill relax and get ready for ET. Dr. Stepan want to do ET on wed not tuesday. Wed afternoon we fly out.. Not sure if it will be too much but we'll see how all it goes.
I am still very excited. And Positive. lets see how long it will last. 
Me and DD were so tired. DD had a couple of rides. We had nice lunch and came home. Slept rest of the afternoon.
We watched mamamia and Lara just loved it.
Over all good day.
Lets see how tomorrow goes.
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## eibhlin

Hey!

Just popping on to say good luck to everyone and let you know I'm thinking of you! 

Kuki - delighted that it's going so well!  Fingers and toes crossed for you     Happy birthday to DD!

Kamie - you're so right, do whatever is right for you, people are always so good at dispensing useless advice   , my advice (!) is to ignore it and follow your heart!  Sticky vibes     

Sabah - that's great news, funny about your mum coming over during 2ww   

KG -   Hope all is well with you

Big hugs   and hello to everyone else!


AFM: we had our consultation on Monday (had a failed FET in Nov) and they had no explanation but said we should try a natural FET with our last frozie (hope it thaws!) in Jan.  It was quite positive and she seemed very upbeat, so lets hope it's good news all around in 2012!  

xox


----------



## Kuki2010

Hello ladies,

Eibhlin,
2012 will be our year.

EC tomorrow. I am abit scared.. But still very posiitve. 

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki          

And for everyone else of course.

xXx


----------



## kamie

Kuki good luck for the morning        

Sabah i live in east london, but grow up in and around croydon and that is where all my family live. I moved away after i got married some 10 years a go now, but still visit at least once a month.

I am still resting and now fustrated. I just want a bfp now, trying to analyse every feeling.





Love kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you Kamie and Sp. So nervous could not sleep. Have been up since 4am. Going to be a long morning. 
Cannot get over EC and come and chill for the rest of the day. Defo sleep in the afternoon with DD..
Really looking forward to rest of our stay at Brno. It is a lovely place. I have been a bit stressed. But it should get easier from now till ET.. Well ET will be a busy day..
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## alexine

Hi Girls may I join you? I'm going to try and make some frosties in the new year before it's too late for me!  I would love to have a sibling for little M. 
Sending lots of     to you all!
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
I am in total shock! I have harvested 17 eggs. I really can not believe this. My most number was 13 when I was 36 year old. Co Q En 10 and Maca did the trick for these I think. I took my meds and vits religously. That is the only thing I did different. A few reflexology. No Acu.. 
I have to say it has been hell painful. Hell and back with bowel movements. I so do not want any more of those. Lets see how the day goes. I have to get fit for Wed morning. 
Tomorrow I find out how many fertilized. I think 10 or so should be okay. Rest will be too small or immature..
Love to you all.
Kukixx

Hi Alexine,
Will be lovely to have you here.. It is a very lucky thread I must say.. 

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

wow Kuki that is amazing!!      Really pleased all going so well so far, it may not be weds, you may go to Blasts?  Have you convinced Dr about number to transfer?  Rest easy and enjoy, really good result!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
I do not want blasts. They don't work with me. 
Day 3 I want. Dr. wants day 4. I am still working on 3 embies to transfer.
All depends on the quality of embies. I will fight till the sec.. I want 3.. See where we get to..
Thankn you hun.
I can not wait to find out how many fertilized.. 
Kukixx


----------



## alexine

Wow Kuki so pleased for you!    17 that's so fantastic!
Sending you      for your embies!
How much coq10 did you take?
xxA


----------



## KG

Kuki, that's brilliant! Hoping the good news continues tomorrow.

ds's birthday - very excited and went to bed exhausted!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Happy brithday to DS.. Bless you.. I can imagine. Hope you are feeling better today.

Alexine,
I have pm'ed you. 300 a day.. 30*10.

Waiting for fertilization report. should come out at 1pm. All I know is out of 17,16 were mature.. I really hope Dh's sperms not going to mucki it up the good work. 

Love to you all..

Kukixx


----------



## alexine

Fantastic Kuki....so pleased for you!   Thanks for the info...I ordered some Maca and I have been taking vits and omegas and for awhile now but will also include more coq10 and maca....You clearly have done something right! Sending you lots of      for fertilisation today!   Exciting!
xxA


----------



## kamie

Hi 

Alexine - welcome, it nice to have you on the thread. 

Kuki - great new on EC. Good luck with this afternoon hope the phonecall goes well.      

KG glad DS birthday went well. How you feeling? Not long know.

Well ladies i am still here taking it easy DS and DH have Gone to my nephews birthday party bowling so we thought i should give it a miss. DH has just phoned to say that he is tired and Ds ran around the place and wanted to play in the amusement area. This is what happens when your child has older cousins i am luck Ds gets to experience lot at a young age. Apparently all the 3 year old were all well behaved and my son was the comedy act he takes after his dad.

Oh and me i am okay brain on over drive now, as i am not feeling anything, am bloated, back aches from time to time and legs are hurting but apart from that nothing. Every other time on two week wait i have had some bleeding by now,  but i am wondering if because i am on cyclogest 400mg three times a day and taking prednisolone tablets this time around i am feeling better, can only hope.

Have not tested yet and i recall last time i did not test until blood test which was positive so hoping if i do not test at home it will be all okay. I have to call clinic on Wednesday to book in for blood test. 

Any way heres to you all.  

Take care 

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Ladies,
11 fertilized. Tuesday will be Et. Will call again tomorrow to see how they are doing. 

Kamie,
oh my god you are so good. I could never do what you doing. Never.. Good luck for wed.. You are nearly there. Welden you!!

Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Kuki      so excited for you, what wonderful results, its got to mean something!!    


Kamie-you have such willpower!!! But I definitely understand wanting to do things the same way as before...so excited for you too as no bleeding      for massive celebrations on Wednesday    on this thread xxxx


My consultation tomorrow afternoon, then off shopping for drugs


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Goodluck for tomorrow. 
Still verypainful tummy. I hope it won't muck it up tomorrow's transfer.
So excited. 
But so very tired. Will do my last two injection for the day. And go to bed early.
Dh went out to meet up with our neighbour and his friends for a drink. Me and Dd should dive into bed nicely in hr..
I fancy something sweet but don't want to eat chocolate. I want to be able to sleep tonight.
Love to you al.
Nite nite.
Kukixx


----------



## eibhlin

Well done ladies, very exciting times!  

Kuki -   great result, sending good vibes to the embies!  All fingers and toes crossed for tomorrow      

Sabah - Good luck tomorrow (and happy shopping!)   

Kamie - thinking of you, well done and am impressed by your willpower     

KG - hope all is well with you!

Alexine - welcome aboard!

big hugs to everyone else


----------



## sabah m

Hello everyone


Really excited today     I had the consultation and my weight loss must be very noticeable as no one even asked to weigh me!  I can maybe cycle later this month depending on AF dates and clinic closure, which I would love!  So I need AF to be delayed till 25 Dec, its due 20th!  Then 3 gonal f doses over 5 days to thicken lining, scan on day 9, then FET 7 days after ovulation.  Much shorter cycle than in the past, only gonal f, so drug cost is only £100, no down reg which I am relieved about as my body stopped responding to drugs last 2 cycles.  I really wanted a natural cycle so this is the best alternative.  Only 1ww as we have blasts....so earliest I could know if its worked is end Jan!!!   


Feeling very very positive which I know is great too!!


Eibhlin-how are you?


Kuki-drink plenty of fluids, hope you feeling much much better for tomorrow    


Kamie-     all is well


Alexine-welcome, this is a lovely supportive thread.  Been on and off it almost 2 years now!


KG


----------



## alexine

Thanks for the welcome... Some great things cooking on this thread! 
Sabah I hope the witch will hang in there for you until the 25th!

I'm hoping to go again in January or Feb but I think I have messed things up a bit. My AF has been really sporadic since having M so went on a pill this month to regulate. Unfortunately the GP I have here ( I'm in Canada just now) put me on a progesterone only pill. I nearly went mental on it and my skin was horrible . The GCRM said I should have been on a combo progesterone and estrogen pill....anyway I had to stop. So not sure where I'm at with my cycle or how long I'll have to wait to start another pill....
Do you usually go on the pill for one month only to regulate or can it be more? Any tips? I didn't go on a pill the last time....
Anyway, I'm doing the vits maca and coq10 like Kuki and hopefully I'll get a decent batch!
Sending everyone lots of     
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi friends,
I am so nervous. 3 hrs time I shall have my 3 embies back. I hope tomorrow flight will be fine. Apperantly very windy in UK and causing problems with flights. Last think I need a fright for my littel body.. I want it to hold on to many babies it can.  

Alexine,
Don't rush it. Take your time. It is better for body to get back to normol cycles after birth. Some takes 3-4 months. Soem takes 7-9 some a year. For it was 7 months. My doc was told me when I had lara. As soon as I have a natural cycle without any meds. We can start roll things. He did check me at 7 months and he said give 3 months and we can cycle he said.
Don't forget you gave birht so that is a year. and a few months of before that the treatment. So you want to be able to get rid of the old ones happens to be waiting and create some nice fresh ones. Can you see your fetility specialist? GPs jsut don't have the knowledge for these things really.
Cos you are planning to freeze not get pregnant. So you can have more time. My doc told me to try fo a cycle within a year of birth so we can get pregnant easyly. Which I did but lost the baby that ime. That's all I remember so far. If I remember something important. I shall write..

Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Ladies, I am pupo with 3*8cell non fragmanted darlings. Grade 1! I still have another 4*8cell non fregmanted. 1*6cell with some fregmants. and 3*5cells. The others too slow. They will try to freeze if they meet to cretria. Tough one. Lets wait and see..
The transfer was easy. Wonderful experience. DD and DH was with me there.. Seen all on big screen.
It has been such a great trip and treatment. Lets hope we end well. The OTD is 27/12/2011. Tooooo long. I will start testing on wed onwards. See how we go..

In Istanbul I used to lie for hr. Well in here 20min. A bit quick. And we walked to our rented flat from clinic. 15mins afterr sitting down in the reception for 15mins. A bit weird but there we are.

I need to walk up to the clinic for my geston injections as we both don't have the guts to do it ourselves.. Wish I could.. 

Very tired. Will go to bed at 8. Will talk tomorrow. Over all what an amazing day it has been. Thank you so much for all your support. Could not do it without you all.

Love.Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Wonderfulnews on the treatment front. Come on lets meet up. You will be only 1 month behind us.. Yuppie!!!
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

wow Kuki, you are PUPO!!!!!   And three embies, boy you must have been pursuasive!  At Noah's time I got straight up from the bed, as there was another person waiting, and walked to London bridge train station, collected the car then drove to heathrow airport....hardly the restful journey but it made no difference!

Hope flight home is smooth.

Yes would love to meet, let me know dates after you rested xxxx


----------



## KG

Kuki, I am ridiculously excited for you. Hoping for a lovely multiple bfp Xmas present for you!

BTW, even with IUI I've never been given the opportunity to lie still afterwards, it's v much in and out at my clinic (and I do mean that literally!!)

Kx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki   for you and PLEEEEASE dont test too early (I know you will anyway   ) As KG said I didn't lie down after ET with DS but I think KG and I are at the same clinic.

Sabah Lovely to hear you sounding more positive really hope AF behaves for once.

Good luck everyone else.

xXx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG and SP,
Nice to know that walking about it is not going to make a negative impact. 
This morning I had to do 30min walking to and from clinic for Gestone injection. I have 4-5more to go. Not sure who will do them in UK. Worried about that.

Sabah,
Once we get home I will write.. Maybe we could meet up in London. All depends how my tummy feels. At the mo so sore and swallen. Very uncomphy..

Love to you all. 

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Kuki well done you are pupo!!! I am so happy for you. Do not worry about lying down i was on may feet each time 20 minutes after transfer. Hope your flight is on time today.

Sabah so glad you are able to start TX soon. Hope it all goes to plan with your dates. 

I am going  crazy here spent yestarday in tears as i started to spot and kept telling myself it is over, but it has stopped and today i feel okay. I am still waiting for prescript on to arrive as meds run out tomorrow night, i think post is up the creak due to Christmas. DH has said not to worry he will sort it, but can not help worrying. Just trying to focus we are meant to have blood test Friday so will call hospital in a bit to get an appointment for Friday morning do not understand why they have not just given me a time. 

Wishing everyone all the luck in the world 

Kamie x x


----------



## sabah m

Oh Kamie, hang in there hun!!!! I was reading through other people's diaries and the amount of women who have had AF symptoms, red blood, pink blood, brown blood then got BFPs is astounding!!!  Lots of women bleed through pregnancies, i am sure you know all this, but it is hard nto to worry.     all is well and baby/ies are nicely settling in for their mummy.  What have you got planned for your days till then, need some box set dvds to occupy the time!!!


----------



## daisy-may

pma kuki .... be positive hon ... you were for me and i for you hon xxx 


sabah ... will do an af late dance for you x x x x text me x x x x x hows noah ?


kamie ..... its not over till its over .... bleeding can be a good thing ...  x x x x x 


daisy x x x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Dear Daisy-may,
I meant to write to you to ask how you all are doing? I hope better?
Thank you darling. Thank you.. When I go down please help me to get up.. Got to stay positive. 
I have done everything I can do.. The rest is just luck and nature.. 
I am still on massive drugs and will carry on till 11-13 weeks if I ever get to that.

Kamie,
All of my friends had lots of bleeding first 12 weeks pregnancy. You won't know till you do the test. Please try to stay positive!

I have to get my DH to do gestone injection this morning and have to say. I am very stressed about it. If he gets in I can do the rest I think but lets see if we can manage.. 

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies

Daisy!!!! Hello, I need your number again, lost it ages ago when upgraded phone!! Noah is my absolute darling, if not a little devlish most of the time.  I love him so much, he is very attached at the moment which i secretly love as he is very much a daddy's boy....wants me to lie in his bed afetr stories till he falls asleep.....I have been putting a stop to it, daddy's been putting himt o bed and I have to say i am going to se a neighbour so he doesn't keep asking for me, he still asks fo rme which i do love!!!  He also keeps wanting me to carry him abotu so that also needs to stop before tx.

Come on ladies you aren;t doing the stop AF dance hard enough for me, as I think I am getting symptoms today, cramps, which i never get!!!

Kamie-one more day!!!!      for celebration tomorrow

Kuki-br brave witht he injections, i can't believe you got away with not doing the for so long!!  How is your tummy feeling?

Helloe everyone else....not long till christmas!!!


----------



## KG

Sabah, I'm too fat to dance, but dancing in my head for you!

Daisy, how are you doing, hun? Hope things are working themselves out.

Kuki, are those jabs really nasty, then? Hope they go ok. You always seem to get your PMA back, you can keep it going this time...

Kamie, keeping everything crossed for you. Hoping you get a nice early Xmas pressie tomorrow.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi all,

I can not sleep. Joys of taking 40mg of pred daily. Yuck..
I am going to do my cards and wrapping presents. And as I do them I realise I still need to get a few things. Don't want to go to shops. I can not walk properly anyways.. And don't want to drive.. 

Today we have suprise birthday party organise for my darling daughter. A friend of mind doing it for us.. Was a lovely suprise to find out on wednesday on to way home from Airport. My DD just adores her DS who is 8. I am sure it was his doing.. 

At 11.30 we have santa show at the nursery. I will defo go to that. And DH will be with me too. It will be his ever first watching DD performing. 

Feeling very peaciful and happy.

Love to you all. 
Kukixx


----------



## kamie

HI Ladies 

We  by the time of night is, i am sure you can guess , yes is was a   for us.

I have not stopped   since yestarday afternoon and have been cleaning the house as we have friend coming over today to swap Christmas presents. I know the topic of conversation will be when are we having our second child as everyone we know is about to have their second child or has their second child.

DH keeps saying i need to look at what i have and be happy other wise i will tear my self apart. i do not know i have never had such a melt down as the hope has always been there but at the moment i can not see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I want a holiday but DH's Business parters wife gives birth end of January and so there is no way we could go away as. just sitting here thinking could i possibly find a Holiday for straight after Xmas for the three of us...

I want to say a big thanks you to all you ladies on here, you are so strong and stay positive your dreams will come true. Stay positive and stress free. 

I will come back and do some personels, but right now i need some time out.

Love Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
I am so very sorry. Please be kind to yourself. 
Yes holiday is a great idea. I am sure you will find something for few days..
You will have your second baby. You will. It is just taking its time. And once you have it all these days will be part of past which you won't remember.
Sending    
If you need us, we are here.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kamie, I echo everything Kuki said so well already. And send you big hugs. We're here for you.

Kx


----------



## daisy-may

kamie  ...


we are always here for you hon xxx


daisy xx


----------



## eibhlin

Kamie - I'm so sorry to hear the sad news     Thinking of you, it's really tough 

Kuki - hope the party went well   and that you're feeling good     

Sabah - great news about the cycle, we might be cycle buddies in Jan   In the meantime, hope you're enjoying the Xmas madness?!

Daisy-May, Sleepy Penguin, KG and everyone else - hope that you're all well and are well set for the holidays!

AFM I've a few minutes off while DH and DS splash in the bath - bought him cutest pjs and dressing-gown which he will be modelling this evening under the tree, most excited!  The tree is a bit tatty and covered with three half working sets of lights, but sure it looks great!  I do some voluntary work and this weekend is mad busy fund-raising, and getting things ready for Xmas, but it is a lovely buzz and very friendly so I'm enjoying it really.  

Ah have to go DH calling!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,
I am so scared that this has not worked. I have not my usual signs like twinging pains in certain places. No implantation bleeding.
So so worried. Ah I hate this 2WW. 
Can not sleep either..
Today it has been 10 days since trigger shot. So it should be out of my system..But will try to last till wed for tests.
Today I will try to keep it busy.. This is driving me crazy already. Why cann't I be just normal and wiat patiently till OTD.. 
I hate this side of my caracter..
Love to you all. Kukixx


----------



## daisy-may

Kuki .... STEP AWAY FROM THE PEE STICKS        


You CAN do this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


daisy xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Daisy-may,
I am not touching today. Promise.
I will get out at 11. Got to.. I am going mad slowly..
A friend of mine has invited us for branch. And has a house full of kids.. So that should stop me thinking about it..
How are you? How are all darlings? Still so beautiful? We want more pics.. I love them..
Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, have a good day with your friends and keep busy. You can do it.

Kx


----------



## daisy-may

Kuki ... a little bit of PMA winging it your way    and heres a link to some recent pics of the kids xxx


daisy xx


----------



## daisy-may

Doh .... heres the link ...

http://www.********.com/media/set/?set=a.10150535491617269.436891.570352268&type=1&l=4d5dd87650​


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning,
Well I know very naughty but did my first test and defo negative. 6dp3dt. At least I know HCG is out of my system for sure.
I think it has not worked. But of course I will wait and keep testing till Christmas day. My digital one I wll do on christmas day morning and if it says not pregnant. I shall stop all my meds and just enjoy my drink and christmas.. 
Breasts are very sore but I think it is progestron. I don't have my twinging pains for my implantation. I had them in all my other pregnancies. And implantation times.. This time nothing. Just over all pain.. Like very sore.. 
I will mail Reprofit today to find out what happened to rest of our embies. If any made it to freezer in the end.
If christmas day morning digital says not pregnant. I shall stop all meds and just drink to all the way to new year!
Love. Kukixx

Daisy-may,
They are so beautiful. They are sitting already.. Wonderful.. Thank you hon. Put a smile on to my face..
Kukixxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi,
Me again.
Reprofit wrote back. 4 blasts are frozen. So I am abit more cheerful. Posible 2 FETs. Although they just don't work with me but still some future hope banked for 2012.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Come on Kuki it is very early days don't put yourself through it yet   .

Daisy what a cheeky trio you have they look adorable.

xx


----------



## daisy-may

Kuki ..    step away from the pre sticks , sleepy is right its too early ! Kuki , both have been sitting up for about a month now and daisy is crawling ! Back latet x x


----------



## rachel1972

kuki sending you a big hug x


----------



## KG

Kuki, you don't need me to tell you it's too early yet. Keep positive.

Kx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Thanks for all your support feeling better at present could not have got this far with out your support.

Kuki - what you doing to yourself. I do know what you mean every day i wanted to test but DH would not buy me any. I drove myself crazy thinking that because i was not getting the same twinges a last time it had not worked, but as you know the meds can make you feel a lots of signs and symptoms you will only know for sure later on. Keep your self busy and try and relax.     

Well we have done some talking and crying and have no intention to give up just yet. In the new year i will get an appointment for a review, DH wants one now but i have asked we get through Christmas as i want to take some time out to think of questions and be Sure of what we want.  In my head i have end of Jan or Feb as when i want to go for TX but have to wait and see what hospital say. 
We have Also decided we are not going to mil's for boxing day and this year we plan to stay at home and spend the day as a family enjoying each others company and watching rubbish on t.v. We are not going away now as costs silly money so have planned that we are going out for the day shopping as a couple and then out in the evening  for dinner so we have have some time to our selves. 

Love kamie x x


----------



## Soon?

Hello Ladies
Hope you don't mind me crashing your thread, I am due to test Friday, had a FET of 2 blasts.  I have been posting over on the FET thread but don't think it is fair to talk about my daughter over there.  
I just wanted to share with someone that my little girl has just pulled out a little house bag I made her ages ago with a little family of four in it, mummy, daddy, a little girl and a baby.  She couldn't talk when she first had it, I had forgotten all about it but she has just been through all the people now and said, mummy, daddy, (her name) and baby.  I am sitting here in tears, so desperate for one more, but feel so guilty.
Thanks for listening.
Sx


----------



## Kuki2010

Soon,
Don't feel guilty.. It is so very natural to have more kids. So very natural.. Okay to want 2-3-4-5...Why should we not..
Enjoy your precious.. And stay positive.. Will happen.. 
Love. Kuixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning,
7dp3dt, and test is negative. I know it is still early.. Very very hopeful. Feeling pregnant.. Hopefully it is not just meds making me feel like this..
Roll on 5 more days..
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Kamie...so so sorry about your news      I know how disappointed you must be, I guess nothing helps just now, but getting all the reasons you are disappointed off your chest...keep posting, we are here for you and have all been in that horrible horrible place.  Lots of love over the Christmas period for you all.  I am sorry others are upsetting you with their questions   

Kuki....hang in there, you still have time.....every  pregnancy is different and symptom spotting is crazy!!!  Enjoy being PUPO, you are almost there      

Soon?....glad you have joined this thread, every prayer this is a positive cycle for you      it will also give me hope for frozen cycles!!  It hurts so much when they ask about siblings, thank God DS hasn't asked yet but my sister having no2 so the dynamics between DS and his cousin will change and I am feeling very sensitive about that.  

You all are very good AF dancing queens....KG you made me LOL how are you doing?  Still no AF, due today, so need another 5 days delay....had a few symptoms but hoping they were for ovulation, at least it means I ovulate!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
AF never comes when you want it.. Just try to forget about it and it will turn up..
You are ready for christmas?
Kukixx


----------



## Soon?

Hi Kuki and Sabah
Thank you for your very kind replies, you sound like lovely ladies.
Kuki, I have been doing a test every day since Sat evening and I am driving myself crazy with it, I have never behaved like this on other cycles but my husband works long shifts so no one is here to stop me!
I have started to get faint positives that seem clearer today but I won't believe a thing till I have a blod test so wish I hadn't done it!
Positive vibes to all and thanks for being on here.
Sx


----------



## sabah m

Ooooooh Soon, that sounds like a very positive sign....     it gets stronger for you




  arrived this evening    All it means is that my FET will have to start next month with the AF as on day 9 clinic will be closed and unable to scan me this cycle.  Oh well,  I now know know i do ovulate and my cycle has gone back to 28 days so hopefully more predictability about when to have ET.


Anyway, might be testing on valentine's day, with another FF who is my work colleague and on her 8th cycle for her first baby!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning darlings,
Yesterday eveing a awful headache started and has not stoped all night. It feels like my core of brain is thumbing..
I don't get headaches. Certainly not this sort ever.
I had pregnancies signs all day yesterday but last night they stoped. Breasts are not tender and my pains are stoped.
I did my Reprofit test this morning and there is a vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv faint line. And DH confirmed it. I woke him up at 6.09am for him to check if I am making it up or not. He says there is something in there.. But like a shadow really. Now I am worried they try to implant and but could not do it properly. 
Well see if gets darker. But I don't have the same test. I still have my stupid cheap testers. And they are so bloody crap. 1st and last time I buy them. With twins well Lara I had a vvvvv faint line on 8dp3dt as of today. 
Staying positively and hoping they are setteling in nicely for next 8 months. 
Lara has developed a cold/cough yesterday so we had an awful nite. I think today and tomorrow will be tough but by christmas she should be okay.. 
Mega busy day we have see how much I can get with my lovely thumbing head.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
I so do not want to join you in february. Hopefully you will join me instead. But I always have doubt on any of my pregnancies.

Soon,
Just enjoy it.. You are preggers. I cannot get to that stage.. Cannot wait..

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Come on ladies....           for christmas presents on this thread for you both!!!!!!! 

Kuki-soooooooooooooooooooooo excited and      this is it and it/they will stick!!!!!!


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

Kuki  remember stay positive. So      this is your time. Take care of your self.

Soon-  Welcome, a line is  a line so be happy and enjoy.I so understand what you said about your DD and baby situation my DS has started to notice that the other children and family friends have brothers and sisters and during my 2ww he kept saying "D have baby brother and sister", it broke my heart. I think my son knows something to up as when i was taking things easy one day he came home and said "mummy sick, be careful". it is amazing what they pick up from their environment.    everything works out.

Sabah sorry to here you have to wait another month to start TX. You never know i may be cycling around the same time as you. Need to call the clinic and book in for review, hoping they will not make me wait to long to start again. 

I am still here and have a ds who is getting spoilt at the moment. Had a break down in the hairdressers yestarday   hoping Christmas will help me focus again.

love 
Kamie x x


----------



## sabah m

Oh Kamie      it kills me every time I imagine DS saying I want a brother / sister, I heard my niece saying it before my sister got pregnant, it is heartbreaking.  It explains why I have bought DS sooooooooooooooo much this christmas despite telling DH I don't want DS to think Christmas is all about presents   ....its compensation isn't it.  How are you going to spoil yourself? It would be great to cycle together, but please make sure your body is rested too.  Do you want to meet up, I can listen to how you feel for hours, I had friends do it for me, the Kids can play together!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning,
I did my two cheap ones. They did not show much.. One is there not there.. I thought I will try my digital which I was saving for Sunday morning. And it says Pregnant 1-2. Called Dh cried my eyes out cos all my signs are just gone. Not much left.. Almost gone to normal self. 
Had an awful nite with Lara's cold. She is suffering..But 2 more days worse is over. 
Girls, I am in shock and so so scared this is going to be taken away from us once again..
Will buy some more good tests for later. Now I wished I bought more digital ones.. Ah I was so stupid..
Love to you all...
Kukixxx


----------



## KG

Kuki, sending you hugs - you are going to drive yourself mad, sweetie. Is Sunday your official test date?

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Kg,
Yes Sunday is the OTD. But we are pregnant. Digital says pregnant 1-2 weeks. So we did it but how healthy they are who knows.. Time will show.
So scared.. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Kuki enjoy your   !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stop crying, you don't know they have left at all.  Symptoms do not always happen there are millions of women who don't knwo they are pregnant for months, no two pregnancies are the same!!!!! It is a miracle, keep praying they will stick and be healthy.  There would have been a good amount of hormone for digital one to show up, you did it with lara so there is no reason you won't hold on to them again!  I am so over the moon for you!!! HAPPY CHRISTMAS!!!!

wow KG you are almost there with meeting your miracle baby too!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Thank you darling.. Thank you.. 
I might go to docs tomorrow and get the HCG and progestron test done.. Don't wait till next week. 
Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, you did it! A bfp!! I think most of us on here know that the real wait is the one that comes after the 2ww, I know why you feel like you do now, but right now you are pregnant! Hold onto that thought, hun.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
All these so far tells me.. I have to keep on fighting till I get to the healthy baby.. There is no other way..
Fight goes on till we have those babies in our arms..
I am so greatful to be at this point.. 
Love. Kukixxx


----------



## daisy-may

Whoo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You DID it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Way to go, lots of love daisy xxx


----------



## rachel1972

yay Kuki great news , i really needed that, been checking in to see how you were doing on and off.  may you have a wonderful xmas


----------



## kamie

yeah....... Kuki you did it. I know it is difficult but you need to start relaxing other wise you will drive your self mad. you have got this far just hang in there.

Sabah - I would love to meet up.  We can arrange something early in the new year i plan to spend some time down south with family so many be then. Thanks for all the support. 

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you all dear friends..
I am trying to relax.. Trying..
Have a great christmas.. I hope 2012 will be our year.. 
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,

Chirstmas EVE! I am excited.. We are already at parents and settled in nicely till monday..

Lara is a bit better..

And my digital says this morning Pregnant 1-2 weeks. So I am still hopeful but very scared.. Waiting if it will move onto the next stage. Got 2 more of digitals to do for next two days..

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## KG

Just popped on to wish a happy Christmas to all - and may all your dreams come true next year.

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Happy Christmas....not long now KG!!

Kuki what amazing wonderful news, you did it!!!!      

Kamie, I know it must be really hard at the moment when you had lots of hope for a wonderful christmas....its not been easy for any of us but Kuki's result shows there is hope at the end of the heartbreaking tunnel    Seeing that KG also has an imminent arrival due also shows despite the ups and downs and glimmers of hope and disappointments the chances of success are still there for all of us. Lotsof love to you and everyone else struggling this Christmas xxxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Dear Friends,
Have a wonderful christmas!!
I had some bleeding today so a bit worried and hopeful at the same time.
Love to you all.
Merry Christmas!!!
Love. Kukixx


----------



## cohensmummy

Hi ladies, 
hope you all have a wonderful christmas and new year . 
Just to let you all know I got    on the 20th (well actuAlly around14th as tested early) I can't believe it as worked again second time around, feel truly blessed but still being very cautious as know it early days xx hope to catch up in the new  
Laura xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Cohensmummy,
Wonderful news! Merry Chirstams. Enjoy!.
Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Happy boxing day ladies,
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## KG

cohensmummy, many congrats!

kuki, how are you doing, hun? Hope the bleeding has stopped. A bfp is a bfp - hoping all continues in the right direction!

Hope everyone has had a good Xmas - nice quiet one here, just me, dh and ds - well, as quiet as it can be with a v overexcited 4 year old! Thinking of going for a walk on the beach this afternoon. My little boy needs to run off some energy - it's like exercising a puppy!!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Bleeding has stoped. Tomorrow is big day. We are getting ints drips tomorrow first thing. Than we will go and get all the blood test done to see how we are doing. I should have more idea tomorrow night. Friday I will have to repeat HCG. To see if it is doubling up. 
We had a lovely christmas and has not stoped since than.. I am feeling cold is finaly coming up. Just wish to do tomorrow and hope to come home and crash to my bed. My sister is here so she is taking Lara tomorrow.. She is with me till saturday. I should get better till than.. 
Will write tomorrow. Enjoy the hols.. Once we have a good result tomorrow maybe I can start to enjoy.. But probably not. Last baby HCG were just great and we still end up losing it. I will get to 14 weeks and know that baby is okay.. Than maybe I can enjoy.
How are you feeling?
Love. Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi all 

Kuki - how are you did you get your test results back?

Cohensmummy - congratulations 

maybe we are on a roll 

Good luck everyone 

love rachel x


----------



## KG

Kuki, been reading your diary - sorry it's been a hard day. Keep your PMA going, I am keeping everything crossed that the numbers move in the right direction.

Kx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki     Nothing more I can say thinking of you

Cohensmummy Congratulations

Good luck everyone else for 2012

xXx


----------



## Kuki2010

SP and KG,
This morning I am more positive. I will enjoy next 2 weeks as pregnant lady. See what 6 week scan will bring. Than deal with the rest.
I think it is going to be okay.. We did it.. We are pregnant. I hope my little darlings will catch up nicely with everything and come to me..
Love to you all.
Kukixxx


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

Congratulations Kuki and Cohensmummy - brilliant news.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Everyone.

I am currently on the 2ww and have just spent this cycle lurking - I'm just a few days behind you Kuki. This 2ww could not have gone worse!  OTD is tomorrow. I tested 7dp 3dt and had a neg.  The next day I tested again and got a feint positive.  Each day since then it's got darker and the CB digital say preg 1-2, which is all great.

But... since day 10 I started to spot brown/pink, no prob I thought, just implantation but then fresh red blood came.  I bled all day yesterday and the day before, not as heavy as a period but enough for a panty liner (sorry tmi!!). Today I am still bleeding but it does seem a bit lighter.

This 2ww has been such a rollercoaster, yesterday I was convinced it was all over and today I'm not so sure. Week 1 I had the Norovirus (courtesy of DD) and this week I have a heavy cold and throat infection!!! 

I'm having my bloods tomorrow morning, so that may give me more of an indication but the clinic are very much 'we're afraid you just have to keep taking the meds and wait and see'.

This is our 7th IVF and I am really, really hoping for the best.

Love and luck to everyone.

Bickers xxx


----------



## KG

Bickers, I will say congrats on getting a bfp and I am keeping everything crossed that it turns out well for you. One thing I have learned since going through tx is that bleeding in early pregnancy is a lot more common than you'd think, so keep positive, I know it's so hard. Sorry to hear you've had a tough few weeks, as if the 2ww isn't hard enough without all that on top of it.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
Same here. Feeling very ill with it and had bleeding too.
We have to keep on taking the meds and see what the scan will show. Till than torching will go on.
Wishing you a great scan in next 2 weeks than maybe we can actually enjoy our pregnancies.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Bickers

KG and Kuli - Thanks so much for your replies. I feel as though I've read almost everything on this site about bleeding and I'm still 50/50!!

Yesterday it lightened a little but this morning. Not a clot but a small pool of dark red blood on the tissue - sorry tmi. There is a light constant red bleed.

I'm having my hcg done this morning, so will let you know what they come back with. I'm absolutely bricking it!!!

Lots of love to you all.

xxxxx


----------



## alexine

Hello ladies,
Sorry for a bit of a me post but can someone tell me is it okay to be on the pill for more than one month before cycling? I'm trying to regulate mine and get back to the UK for Feb to try and freeze some embies before it's too late! I can't get in touch with anyone at the GCRM right now and AF might be tomorrow....
Thanks!
Sending lots of      for BFP's on this thread!
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Alexine,
yes it is fine. I did it. Reprofit uses pill.. So it is fine. and it is better so you don't ovulate your naturally selected eggs. tEhy will be wiaitng for IVF pick up..Sorry in hurry jus twanted reply before I go off.

Bickers,
Good uck hun. I amoff now too.. lets see what happens.

Kukixx


----------



## alexine

Thanks Kuki!! Thinking of you!     
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Darlings,
HCG is 571.3. Was expecting around 540-550 or so. Only has been 44hrs.. Look who is counting.. 
I am so happy. I really hope it is going to be okay.. We are so close and yet so far.. 
Can not wait till 2 weeks to see how we will be doing.. 
I will try to be all posiitve and just enjoy next 2 weeks. Won't allow negative thought to bother my tum tum..
Love you all and thank you all for increadible support. I could not cope this without you all. Thank you.. 
Kukixx


----------



## KG

That's great news, Kuki - so pleased for you.

Kx


----------



## eibhlin

Great news, well done


----------



## rachel1972

great news kuki so pleased its all ok x


----------



## Bickers

Kuki,

That's great news - well done.  Hopefully you can relax now.  


Sadly my HCG has come back too low, it's 48.  The clinic are going to test me again on Tuesday, as a formality but it looks like this one's a chem preg for me.  Ironically since the call, the bleeding has been heavier and af pains are starting to kick in.


DH and I are planning to dust ourselves off, give it a month or so and try again.


Love and luck to you all.


Bickers xxxxxx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi bickers so sorry to read your post , huge hugs x


----------



## KG

So sorry, Bickers, sending hugs.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
Hun I am so very sorry.. Yes get the tests done.. Just in case.. 
Sending lots of       over to you.
Kukixx


----------



## eibhlin

So sorry Bickers   thinking of you


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
Just came to wish you all a very happy new year. Hope you are having a good one!
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## Bickers

Thank you so much ladies  You'll never know how much support you really are.

DH and I are planning the next cycle and have booked an appontment to see my consultant next week, we've decided it will be our last go before we give up, count our blessings and enjoy life as a family of 3. I've had 3 fresh IVF cycles and a laparoscopy all within the last 6 months, so I feel I really want to step off the treadmill very soon.

Happy New Year to you all!!!



Bickers xxxxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Bickers,
That is the spirit. Weldone you. 
Take your time. You are still young.. Get yourself ready for one more shot. 
Please 2012 be a lucky one for us all.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,
How is the new year going? I hope well!
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Bickers   sorry for your disappointment, here's hoping 2012 is our lucky year. My FET this month will be my last tx too, need to get on with life and stop living on 'pause'. Not had a holiday in ages!

Tx starts 18th Jan with AF. 9 days of gonal f then scan to check lining thick enough before ET.    for good thaw of my two frosties. I had two out of three thaw successfully with first FET so not too worried.

Been very lazy over the last week, only took DS out once -to the park, had a friend and child come over to play this morning. DS has become very very attached to me which is lovely but going to be tough in 2ww. He won't let daddy change him, put him to bed etc just keeps calling for me and screams the place down. Kuki how have you managed with Lara? Have you done any lifting? My sister 22 weeks pregnant and still picking up my DS and her 4 year old, said her Dr said there is no clear evidence lifting weight linked to miscarriage


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
I have probably told you. My friend lift her 2.5 year old big boy up and down 6 floor of flats.. And her FET still stuck fine..
I think stressing and anxiety upsets us more.. We just need to use common sense.The rest will be fine.. 
My mum convince that stretching for things is more harmful than actually lifting kids up etc.. 
Out of my whole 8 cycle this cycle was the only relax one. I just relax about it all. I think it is worked cos of it..Please try not to stress. Easily said and done.. So very difficult.
MCs happens cos of XY or immunes or infections or some other illness does not allow your body to get pregnant going on to next stage.. Lifting is never an issue realy unless you have incompetent womb. Which is lifting effects the uterus reaction. You don't have that so I would not worry about lifting your little darling.
We are so busy. I am loving this.. Not looking forward to tomorrow though. Lara has to go back to nursery. I need to drive. I have not driven since ET. Streching legs worries me.. I have very very tight tummy but I think it is severely broozed from injections it has been taken since 27th of november. I will do calcs to see how many injections did I have this time.. Going to be hundreds.. My poor tumtum..
Happy new year!!! Lets hope we meet up properly this time darling..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Sabah, I know we've not had the same tx, but I lifted ds through 2ww and onwards, although perhaps not quite as much as before, I only really stopped picking him up when I got the hernia/ muscle problem and physically couldn't. I did get him to help with the weight, by getting him to jump as I was picking him up, or stand on a low stool so I wasn't lifting so far. 

We have the opposite problem at the mo - ds only wants daddy, which is probably quite good timing, really!

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Thanks ladies, I guess we will always find something to worry about!  KG this is your big week!! Was DS overdue, how are you feeling  How amazing is it you are here now, are all your preparations made?


I am getting preoccupied with all this again, think i need to go back to work (next week!).  Have got nothing done all morning, I just want tx to start NOW!!!!


----------



## KG

Yep - hopefully something will happen soon - feeling a bit rubbish today, so hopefully that means something is happening!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
How are you feeling today? Thinking of you. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Hi Kuki, still waiting. feeling brighter today than I have all week, which is a nice change. How are you doing? Do you have a scan date?

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi KG,
Well gp called to say he can not get me to see anybody at EPU unless i am having bleeding or soemthing. They Won't see me this early. Well I was not holding my breath.
I have booked my private scan with FMC for friday 13th. 11am. MIL will be with me Dh can not make it. I don't want to be own my onw this time. Just in case it is bad news again.So 9 more sleeps I will know more.. 
Have been so busy so it is going very quick. Tomorrow we have Lara's open day at our favourite school. I am so nervous. I know stupid but can not help it. I hope we will leave the place happy after all these effort. We still have to wait till April 15th to find out if she gets in or not.
But it is funny. I did my nails and eye brows just for tomorrow. Stupid right? I am going to look extra respectable etc.. I am so glad Tom will be with me.. He is taking the morning off for it.
The people who are waiting for labour they say they get this energy just before labour coming to get them ready for it.. Natures funny way to deal with things.. I am so excited to find out when and what you will have.. Thinking of you everyday. I come here and check if any news..Let us know when you can. Wishing you a lovely experience.. 
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Ha ha Kuki your comment about hoping KG has a lovely experience made me laugh   , sorry KG!  Did you get all the drugs sorted ok, did GP help at all?


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
My birth with Lara was an incrediable experience.. Absolutely wonderful..That I had in mind.  

GP has given me clexane injections which is 15pounds a day. So not bad. He can not get me EPU scan. They won't allow him unless I am bleeding or something. I have booked MW app. 26th of jan. 
Last night I had orgasmic dream. Mid dream my uterus had cramps and pain was so awful I woke up with it and had it for good 15 mins.. Now I am so worried babies are harmed.. I know stupid but it was so painful..I hope I have not disturb anything in there.. Cannot wait for the scan. 8 sleeps to go.. 

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

I have not been around for a while but i was checking in to see what was happening.

Kuki -i am so happy for you. you must stay positive and hoping your scan goes well in 8 sleeps time. 

Sabah- not long now till you start your TX. please do not put to much pressure on yourself , you need to be relaxed. I think i put to much pressure on myself last cycle and i think that is why it did not work for us. Take care of your self,   your dreams come true.

Bickers -sorry to hear things did not work for you. Have you see your consultant yet,   it all goes well for you and this is the year your dreams come true.

KG -Thinking of you.

Well I am okay, we had a busy Christmas and a quiet new year. DH and DS where  home for over a week, which was tiring and on top of that Christmas eve we got rid of DS' dummy and he now keep waking up three times a night screaming for it. Well what can i say he knows what he wants just like his parents.
Me and DH have managed to talk about what to do next and have decided neither of us are ready to give up this journey, so i have managed to book a review appointment with consultant next week to discuss our options.

    to all of you what every your situation.

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Wishing you lots of luck for next trial. You are so young still. Plenty time..

KG,
You have been quiet.. Is everythng okay?
Thinking of you..

Sabah,
How are you doing darling?

Love to you all.. 7 more sleeps to meet my darling/s..

Kukixx


----------



## KG

Hi Kuki, yes, still here. Had a sweep yesterday, then induction on Mon if no movement. Glad you had a lovely birth with Lara - I don't recall enjoying Ts much, except for the moment they handed him to me! How did the school open day go? I filled my form in the other day and just put down the village school. They aren't oversubscribed so shouldn't be a problem. I'm a bit cross that they make no effort to attract new parents, though, no open day here. Not long to wait for your scan now - glad you are keeping busy.

Kamie, v brave dropping ds's dummy, I think T was coming up to 3 when the 'fairies' took his away! Good luck with whatever route you decide to go down next.

Sabah, hope all is going ok.

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Hi Ladies


All is going ok, lost 3lb of the 7 I put on over christmas!!!   Been strict with diet, lots of healthy home made soups....back to work next week where I walk a lot more so hopefully will lose the rest quicker.  But time going soooooooo slowly!!


Kuki, I thought you had something today?  Scan?  Amazed at your birth experience, lucky you, you must also have very high pain threshold!!  Also, so weird I have read about others newly pregnant getting naughty dreams, it must have been amazing to last that long!  I was reading someone else's FET diary and she had sex during 2ww (I am too afraid for that!) and still got pregnant!  I guess its like you said before, if they're gonna stick they will, and yours have stuck with their mummy this time.


Kamie, its good you feeling there is more you want to do, it feels like we are getting closer each time     My DS resorted straight away to using his thumb when we took the dummy away, hope your settles soon poor love!


KG even when they handed DS to me I did not have my glasses and was too embarrassed to ask if he was a boy (incase scan was wrong!) and DH also did not see as we had complications so they whipped him away pretty quick to check him over, and DH was also embarrassed to ask    !!! That part was funny!


I met a foster mum who had the most beautiful 2 yr old boy she has had since 4 months who has been hard to place with adoptive parents as he is mixed race (asian and white).  He looks just like DS!!!!! 3 people who saw us together commented how similar the boys looked.......I felt attached immediately, I felt in a heartbeat I would take him rather than go through tx, seriously!!!  We have often thought about adoption....but DH now 51 time not on our side.  I felt so awful that boy will be removed from his foster parents at such a stage of his life, so so cruel the process takes so long.


----------



## Kuki2010

Darlings,
No not today. It is next Friday. We are only 5 6 today. GP was trying to get an EPU for today. And EPU said no to him unless I am bledding or something.

Sabah,
Lara was elective c section in private wing at St. thomas's. We had a beautiful view of westminister. All 3 of us stayed for 4 days 3 nights in our own room. There was a team gathered together just for me. It was the best days of our lives. I was very very worried and scared mummy to be.. Just for me my consultant brought a retired nurse. She was the best thing happen to me. Best thing.. I write to her every year.. She is a darling. Big black mama.. I mean proper loving cuddly.. Giant heart. My angel she was. I will never ever forget her. And the effect she had on me. I was waiting to go to theater. i was shaking I mean violently.. Se gave me a huge cuddle.. And kiss my forehead. She said with her beautiful accent.. Murvet; everything is going to be alright. Nothing to worry about.. In a few minutes your baby will be in your arms.. And that was that. I relaxed and she was incrediable. She was my babies nurse.. And took care her so wonderfully.. She was my angel that day.. One amazing lady.. I so wish to have same team with us but it cost 8.5k back in 2007. Not sure how much it would cost now.. We have to use probably 3 credit cards for it.. 

KG,
I wrote to you a huge post this morning and lost it. Got so upset and left it. Above was in that too but promise once I have time and energy i will write down my thoughts on open day yesterday. 
But most important thing is for you to have a relaxing weekend and Monday to meet your second miracle. Will be thinking of you whole weekend. So very exciting for you.. Well I am.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki   for next Friday your birth story sounds amazing also explains why you found the whole experience so amazing   , I was wondering what wonder drugs you were given in labour otherwise.

Sabah I could not foster as couldn't give them back it is daft you can have a baby at any age but not adopt lets hope the rules change for the better. Good luck for the coming weeks.

KG Good luck for the next few days in a weeks time you will be missing the bump.

To all those not so lucky recently   .

SP
x


----------



## Kuki2010

SP,
No drugs just epidural for the c section. That is it. Was on morfin for 3 days after. I was able to do everything for Lara.. Painful yes but was easily coping.. Bowel movements were agony or sure. I was in very very high being just with my baby.. I have waited for so many years for her.. I was so so happy... did not think about pain at all. 
I can not wait to hear the scaner to tell me it looks so good..
I don't know ifI culd be so lucky to have these feelings again for second time.. It seems so so far away..
Love. Kuixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, I understand why it was wonderful now - so lovely to have such a positive experience, not many women can say that.

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies

I am really struggling, the closer it is getting to tx I think it is hitting me this is the last time and I will no longer be able to live in hope if it fails. I was feeling really stable till I saw the foster boy I wrote about yesterday. I can't stop thinking about him and I guess it shows me how desperate I still am to have another child. There is no way DH will agree to go through adoption route, this has had a big impact on our marriage already and I think it will be very selfish of me to start on another stressful and potentially heartbreaking journey. What on earth will I do if this doesn't work?    ?? I am sorry to put negativity on this post. We also went to a party today where all the mums had 2 kids or expecting 2nd ones.....I wish I lived in China where you were only allowed one so everyone else felt the same way as me!


----------



## daisy-may

sabah, text me hon !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


daisy xxx 


will pm you my no now hon xxxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
We cannot think like that. Come on what happend to your PMA.. Get it back. 
We never know in life.. If you want to have more babies you will have them. You know that.
Sending you billions of     
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

Sabah - Please do not put so much pressure on yourself, and you need to find away to get rid of the negative thoughts. I recall when I did my first round of ivf for a second child and i was so scared i would not have any eggs as with my son i only had one, but because I was so scared and could not get the thought out of my head and at EC i had no eggs. Due to that this last cycle i was convinced I would prove everyone wrong and i could get eggs and I got three not brilliant but i got that far. so please start thinking positively.    

Kuki - How are you doing ? hope you are still getting some time to rest during the day now Christmas is over.

Well we are busy for the whole of Jan, Birthday party's children and adults all month feel quite stressed by it all as friends are pregnant and about to give birth. i know people are going to ask me when i am have my second child, i know it is just them being kind and asking but what to say. Thinking i may use the line "when god gives me another miracle" that should end the conversation.

Need to go ment to pick up DS from MIL in 10 minutes and not even dressed yet.

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
I am doing oaky I think. My tummy feels fine in last 3 days. Just worring about that most of the time. Or trying not to worry..
Physicly I am not doing much. But doing a lot of accountancy work for my bro's account. He has some tax issues tring to solve those for him. Which is occupying me nicely..
I like your line ' 2nd miracle' That should stop being more noisy or asking more questions..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Hi ladies, no energy to read back, but just to say, baby decided to avoid tomorrow's induction and arrive a bit quicker than planned.

Our second son, Amos Edward, arrived Saturday evening, less than an hour after we arrived at hospital! Waters went at 3pm, first tiny contraction at 4.30pm, arrived at hospital fully dilated at 7.20, baby arrived at 8.18pm. 

Love to you all.


----------



## Monkeymoo

congratulations xx


----------



## Tillypops

Huge congratulations! And a lovely name too!

xxxx


----------



## alexine

Big congratulations KG!        
Enjoy this time with your little one! 
xxA


----------



## daisy-may

wow KG, that really was fast !!!!!!!!!!!


Welcome to the world Amos ( fab name too ! )


sending lots of love your way, daisy xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Oh my god!!! You super woman!!! Fantastic!!! 
Welcome to our world Amos!! Beautiful name.. 
Enjoy your second miracle!!!
What a wonderful day!!! 
You certainly made mine..
Love to you all.
Kukixxxxx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Well done KG looks like the space hopper worked   Congratulations 

x


----------



## Bickers

Hi Ladies,

KG - CONGRATULATIONS!!!!      

Kuki- How are you feeling? Not too long until your scan now - so exciting!!

Sabah    I know exactly how you feel but Kamie's right, we need to get our PMA on track for our next cycles.

AFM - I had my follow up with my consultant and he said that although the norovirus and throat infection during the 2ww wouldn't have helped, he's stumped as to why it's not working.  We both agreed that the next cycle will be my last.  He wants me to wait 2 natural cycles, to give my ovaries a rest and we'll start again at the end of March.  In the meantime, he want me to have my AMH re-done to see what my levels are.  
I have terrible endo and my ovary was actually stuck to my pelvic wall last time, so I have to have quite involved laparoscopys.  However, they are only good for 6 months and then the endo all comes back, even worse, after the stimulation.  We'll also have a Zoladex implant for downregging this time, as that should hold off some of the endo.  
I went to see a psychic on Saturday and she knows nothing about IVF but I asked her if I should carry on and she said 'just one more time, then no more'.  She said I'm sorry if that sounds harsh but you asked me to be honest with you, which I did.  So that was interesting.  She also told me I'm too matter of fact about the treatment and next time they put the embryos in, I should mentally connect with them and nuture them - so I will be talking to my belly, like a loon, in April!!!   

I am up to my eyes in primary applications for DD.  It's sooooo stressful, still the deadline is the end of the week, so it's all down to fate after that

Hi to everyone I haven't mentioned, I hope you're all well. Happy Monday ladies.

Bickers xxxxx


----------



## kamie

KG - congratulations! so happy for you and your family.

Bicker - You sound very positive, keep it up.

Kuki - when is your scan ?

Sabah - how you doing today?

I have the hospital in the morning for a review. let see what they have to say.

Kamie xx


----------



## sabah m

Wow KG Congratulations!!!!!       I absolutely love the name Amos too, what made you choose it? Its such fantastic news for all of us as it shows even after heartbreak when hope is bleak miracles truly happen xxxxx

Kuki-4 more sleeps till you see your miracle! Yours will be the next delivery announced on here!!!!!

Thanks for all the supportive messages ladies    I am feeling better, made a decision to get more in line with my faith and in tune with God so He can provide the comfort I need in case I need it. What else can I do? Bickers-I am scared of PMA! But you are right, no point being negative, it can work! Hope school stuff sorts itself out in way you want, not looking forwards to that stage of development!

Kamie   hope you get some mew answers tomorrow.

I had a chat with a friend about how I am feeling, she joked that I should split up with DH, get knocked up then beg him to have me back as I missed him!!  While I would love to do that I could not live with myself....I knew he had had a vasectomy when we met and as I did not want children then it wasn't a problem so its all my fault we are in this situation!!

DS is soooooooooooo lovely, even when he's pushing boundaries like crazy!


----------



## Tillypops

Hun, this is nobody's fault so don't blame yourself!

xxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Nobody's fault darling. Nobodies. Just luck.. It is just life.. 
Please be positive.. Enjoy your precous.. He is gorgeous.. and he is yours.. totally yours.. 
We are already so very lucky!!!
Sending     
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

HAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

need help!

We went to our appointment this morning and consultant told us he was retiring and and his clinic is closing down at the end of Jan all his files are being transfered to London women's clinic on 16th Jan. HAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

So here is the outcome, if we want to go ahead with treatment and pay the same amount of money as last time we have to let them know in a day or two so i can get an appointment to meet LWC and get meds in place. this will mean i am a straight forward transfer to LWC from Highgate as an client who has started treatment not having to pay any additional costs. Plan b is we wait like i wanted call LWC and tell them i am a highgate client and go for a consultation and see what they say, the risk with this is starting form the beginning and them making both of us do all the test again, which will cost us Harley street prices. This will also mean waiting for all the test to be done before we start any treatment.
Plan c find a new clinic and start a fresh. 

Also clinic had a chat about  using an egg donor again, but we have said as the last cycle worked we would like to try again with a fresh cycle, but he has told us if it does not work LWC may suggest egg donor. i think we will have to cross that hurdle when we come to it.

we are confussed . DH has told me to research LWC today to see if what people are saying about it . Then tonight we talk and may be we need to be realistic and go for treatment now so we get on the books at LWC and save some money. DH has been great and told me not to stress about money and be positive, even though he is stressed as he has gone all quite and is not saying a lot.

I am not sure i want to travel on the train for all my appointment, i am so used to a small one doctor clinic where we drive to and park with no problem. Now we have to think about a hospital i am scared i will not build the same kind of relationships as i have.

If any one has used LWC people could you tell me what you think of them?

why is life never straight forward.

thanks for listening 


Kamie xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
LWC is a busy place. Successful with Donors for sure. YOu need to go and check it out see how you feel. I found that in UK clinics they just don't have the same standart as foreign clinics.. Because of that I always went to abroud for my treatments. 
I have a good freind of mine from here. She has got lucky in her third trial and got her son from LWC. And she will defo go back to it for the second one. 
With any clinich you have to deal with them and see how you feel. That is what I did in the past.
Wishing you lots of luck..
Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

Kuki Thanks for your reply. i think you are right i am not going to know for sure what to expect until i start talking and visiting LWC. you made me laugh in a much earlier response when you said you had been doing tax stuff for your bro. I was helpping DH with our tax return have finished them and with accountant now. This time of the year always feels like there is so much going on. hope you are keeping well?

Sabah how are you doing? i think using your faith to stay strong is a good idea. I have done that through all my treatments,even though i am on overly religious. Do not blame your self for things that have happened i believe everything happens for a reason, look at us just when we think we are moving forward after last treatment we know have to deal with a new hospital and start travelling on London underground for TX.

Well today is another day. i am contacting some one for some advice today re: lwc and then will call highgate this afternoon to ask what the procedure is if we sign up to TX now as a transfer case to LWC. I could be starting my next round of TX end of the month if this all goes ahead. it is going to be crazy but as DH said last night we have nothing to lose and we have everything in place with regards to our family and DS. I am spending the day sorting out the house today and want to start my meditation today in case everything goes ahead. Still on my vitamins and have started my healthy eatting again since last week so i think things are in place.

Will be back to up date if we do sign up to next round of tx 

Kamie x x


----------



## Tillypops

Just thought I'd pop in to let you know that FF is 10 years old today!! There is a party tonight in the chatroom from 8-10pm for any of you that are interested!

Tilly
xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Tilly,
Thank you.. Happy Birthday to dear FF.. I don' know what I would do without it..
And thank you for people like you.. Helping FF to accomadate us.. Big kiss.
Kukxx


----------



## sabah m

Absolutely agree with Kuki, Thank you FF for support in every way!! Thank you to all who devote time to it for us all!!

Kuki one more sleep     all is healthy and as it should be tomorrow!

kamie-crap having to make changes so unexpectedly!  I have to use a train into London Bridge for ET but am lucky enough to be bale to drive and park at clinic for everything before that.  A change might be a good thing though, new clinic, new chances     Will be good to cycle together!  Good to knwo you are eatling healthily, I put on 8lb over christmas, have shifted 4 but feeling very unmotivated to be good with diet, why So close to tx why am I falling apart?

Generally feeling better, have a FF at work (!) which is great, but she's starting her 8th ICSI soon and I feel bad she's motivating me and she hasn't been successful yet, I need to stop moaning and be thankful for what I have got and thankful i have this new chance too!  This could be the one!!! I keep reminding myself Daisy's first success was with FET, so mine could work!!!  Come on ladies, we need more BFPs on here now!!!

Bickers     thinking of you, rest and get your body's healthy back since previous cycles during this wait, you will be pg by Christmas!!!


----------



## KG

Thanks for all your good wishes, ladies. All going smoothly here so far.

Kuki, I will be thinking of you tomorrow and hoping all is well.

Sabah, sending you hugs. The closer I got to tx for no2, the more doubts I had. I questioned before each cycle whether we should go ahead and spent a lot of time weighing up the pros and cons and at one point only kept going cause I thought I might regret it later if I stopped without getting to the end of the tx we'd decided on. I think it's self preservation as we know what tx is like, so it doesn't have the same excitement, that the first time does.

Oh Kamie, that must have been hard to take, having to move clinics on top of everything else. 

Bickers, hope your school application is going ok. I did mine last week and still stressed about it, even though it's quite straightforward for us.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

KG,
Thank you so much.. You just enjoy your second precious.
Will update 1ish tomorrow.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Good luck Kuki


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Kuki good luck today!

Sabah i find out today what is happening re treatment. 

Kamie x x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi Ladies,
I am sorry. I had visitors in the flat. i could not write front of them. 
It is good news.. Well good.. Great news.
We have one perfect baby on board. With its size measuring great for its dates. And has a lovely HB. 
It is tiny but good size at 7.4mm for 6+6.122bpm. Doc was very happy. With its position/sizeHB and size. I can not discribe you how I feel.. I am in shock.. The happiness.. I am delighted.. We are going to have a little celebration tonight as soon as my sister arrives. I know it is stilll early but we never got to this stage in last 4 years.. So we shall celebrate the day! 
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, I am so, so happy for you - just smiling so much. You did it, clever you! Wishing that you enjoy a smooth pregnancy, you've waited so long. 

Kx


----------



## rachel1972

Kuki great news enjoy every moment xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you darlings.

4 years later. 7 cycle. We are here.
Tomorrow I go to immune drip treatment. Going to be hard long day but itso worht it.

Kg,
How is it going? With your new littel man?

Rachel,
Thank you hun.. Still in a state of shock.. I will try to enjoy it once I know Dr. Gorgy says we are in control in immunes and baby is not in danger.

Sister is about to come.. First we are having a nice turkish supper.. Tom will be working late tonight. Oh well I am sure we will pass out by the time he is home..

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Well done Kuki and Tom Good luck for the next 8 months and beyond x


----------



## sabah m

I think it is a boy!!!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you darlings. Thank you.. Still on cloud 9!!!
6hr solid sleep I had. I handed Lara over to sister.. And went to sleep with Tom last night.. Was nice.. Might enjoy that tonight too. But will take over Lara and sleeping arrangements from Sis on sunday night. Sister has got a demanding job. She needs her sleep..
Off to Forest Hill today. For intralipids treatment. Not looking forward to it.. But got to be done..
Wishing you all a great weeknd.. 
Love to you all..
And thank you again..
Kukixx


----------



## kamie

hi kuki congratulations! I am so happy for u and ur family. I am a way for a few day  and on my mobile so will catch up later. X


----------



## daisy-may

kuki my darling xxxx 


you are doing so well .... hope you had a nice time with your sis ...


lots love ,daisy xxx


----------



## wright1

Hi everyone,

Am I in the right place for support for treatment when trying for baby no.2?


----------



## eibhlin

Hi ladies!

Welcome Wright1 - you are in the right place   congrats on your baby, are you looking to start TX or ttc natural?!  

Kuki - hope you got on well with your intralipids TX?  Hope you and bump are keeping well!

KG - congrats!  hope the baby is settling in well?!

Hope everyone else is keeping well?

We're doing a natural fet with our last frostie this month, had scan today to check I ovulated and lining.  Apparently the ET (if snow-baby thaws that is!) is on Saturday which is day 21.  Seems v late to me and was a bit down about it this afternoon in work, but am going to do best to be very positive about this little snow-baby as (s)he is potentially a little bro/sis for my little boy.  Now wouldn't that be something! 

xox


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies!


Wright 1 welcome, hop you find lots of support on here on your journey to no. 2 xxx


Eibhlin----how exciting!!     for perfect thaw, will really be praying for you, I will be a couple of weeks behind you, semi-medicated. How's your lining doing?


Hello to everyone else    


AF due tomorrow, lets see if it comes, or is late just to mess me about unlike last month when it came bang on time and spoilt my tx plans!  Anyway, trying my hardest to pluck up PMA, have lost most of christmas weight so at least not too worried about weight......just so worried full stop!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah and Eibhlin,
Come on        all the way..
Praying over here for both of you!!!

Wright,
Hi ya ! Yes this is the one.. Chat away..

Daisy-may so so scared.. Terrified it will all go tits up.. Taking aday at the time. I have booked my immune doc for monday. He will do the scan too. 6more sleeps to find out if it is still okay.. 

Sending my love to you all..

Kukixx


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

Hello, 

Can i join you? I am desperately hoping for another miracle with frozen cycle. I had prostap injection last monday to downreg and am waiting for af to start (due today) then it's a few scans and then transfer - prob not for good few weeks though. Nervous thinking about it.

Jess


----------



## sabah m

Still no AF!! AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Just relax.. Try.. Than  only it comes.. The anxiety stops it blody thing coming. It does to me..    

Jess,
Good luck.. Hope your AF comes on time..

Wishing you both lots of luck!!!    

Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies,

welcome Wright 1 and Jess you are in the right place for support, i have found everyone so welcoming and friendly.

Eibhlin-  hope TX is going to plan and    for you.

Sabah-  My AF is always late when on TX. Kuki is right when you relax it will appear. 

Kuki - I have just read some of your diary and i  . I am     for you and hope you can start enjoying your pregnancy soon, you are strong and so is little one, take care of your self.


I have had a few days away and been running around sorting out where i am going to have my next TX.Well we are off to lwc this afternoon for a consultation i am so hoping they are sticking to charging us less than their normal prices due to us agreeing to be transfered over. i also hope they say we can go for TX as soon as , as since all the ups and downs of last week i have got it in my head i do not want to wait. My AF is due any time from sunday but i am sure it will be late due to all the stress of sorting out clinics since last week, but that could be a good thing if all goes to plan today. I am sure i am not making sense as i am so scared about today and to top matters our friends texted us late last night to say they had a baby girl, i am so happy for them but of cause that has just added to my worries and i only slept for three hours last night. just want to   .

   VIBES TO ALL OF YOU WHO HAVE STARTED TX, WAITING TO START TX AND THOSE OF YOU PREGENANT.



Love Kamie


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Hope today went well?
Love. Kukixx


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

Hello

Kamie -    that does sound stressful and you sound upset, hopefully you can get some a good night sleep

Sabah - hoping af turns up soon, am waiting for mine too. 

Kuki - when are you due? Such great news. I've been cuddling a 7 week old baby today  sooooo lovely.

hope all is well, 

Jess


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi HQ,
I can not think of when I am due yet.. I want to get to 14 weeks and than think we are going to have a baby.. Still very very early.. Should be end of August. 
I have my scan on monday with immune specialist.. So worried. Trying to be positive.. 
Hope Af turns up soon.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## KG

Kuki, hang on in there, hope you have plenty to keep you occupied over the weekend.

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Thanks for support ladies, AF came just now!!  Raging hormones!!


Kuki-its so crap you aren't able to enjoy the miracle for fear,    but you have to stay positive, you have come so far this time, keep looking ahead not back!!  Remember how exciting the BFP was!!  


Kamie-hope all is well    


Jess here's hoping your AF doesn't play hide and seek!


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

Sabah - so glad you are finally starting tx, it has been a long wait.

Jess - hope your AF arrives soon.

Kuki - hope you are finding lots of things to keep you busy.

Well we went to LWC yestarday and it went well. the staff are really nice and our dr is nice she went through my history and wants to give me a higher dose of drugs this time and get Even more follicles than last time. I have been told to take metformin for my PCOS as they this should help my hormones and insulin levels, also on gonal f 300 iu, menopur 75iu to start with and then will add another injection to the list at day 6 orgalutron and the ovitrelle for HCG the only drug i have taken before is menopur so i will have to see how i feel on these drugs. I have sent my prescription off to homecare today so hopefully they get it early next week and i can have the drugs by wed /thursday. I could have got the drugs from LWC but it is a two week wait for them and they charge £1800 for them. 

AF is due any time after Monday but i am usually late before a tx cycle so i am hoping nothing changes this time around as if the drugs arrive before or on day of AF i can start this month yeah !! only thing is i have a small cyst so i have been told if at day 2 scan the cyst is still there i will have to take bcp and then start tx the following month, which is not a problem as i know i will be starting. i am on a short protocol again so happy.

So now the waiting begins for everything to fall into place, all i can do is    and .

Hoping everyone has a nice weekend, i am off out tonight and then off the Royal Albert hall on sunday with DH. My plan is now to enjoy myself until tx starts as this may help me unwind and not be as stressy as i have been.

Love Kamie


----------



## sabah m

Brilliant news Kamie    How did you feel with it being a new clinic etc?  Sounds like they have really reviewed your history and trying what they think is best for you.  Would be good to cycle together but even if not exciting we are both getting nearer our new babies!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
That is the PMA!!!! Any news on AF?

Kamie,
It sounds great.. Just go for it!!! 

Yes ladies.. we want lots and lots of new babies!!!

I am on count down to check up with Dr. Gorgy.. Want to know how my body is reacting to embie..8 weeks exactly today.. So so very scared.. 

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

wow I thought i posted here.....AF started yesterday!!         I will be positive because it can work!!!  Gonal f day 3, 5, 7 then scan 7am friday.  Need good liining and ET to coincide with ovulation, 4th feb time     




kuki-hope 2 more sleeps pass quickly, what time is scan?


have you told Lara?


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Yeah!!!! Go girl!!! 4th feb will be here before you know it.. 

At 10.30 am. But all the blood tests willl be done after. And I have to wait for results so we can plan of action to immune flares..

Oh darling Lara was at the Embyro Transfer with me. So she knows it all. She kisses my tummy every day.. and tell Toddy to stick to mummy so we can have him in her room soon. When I showed her first pic of emby in the tummy. She said; mummy it looks like a baby frog. i said to her a toad? She said yes.. lets call it toddy mummy.. So now we call it Toddy.. 

Kukixxx


----------



## sabah m

Thats really cute!!!  yes really     toddy sticks to mummy and can be in Lara's room keeping her awake before the year is out!!!


Have you reduced any of the drugs yet or is that all decided after meeting next week?


How many more immune drips?


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Every 4 weeks one till 35weeks.
I will be on drugs till min 14 weeks. But clexane will be till 30th week I think. How I don't know. No many spots left to do on my tummy.. I will ask Dr. Gorgy if I can do them on my legs.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,

Sounds like a few of you are just about to start tx...    to you all.

Kuki - Seen you on the other thread but so happy for you!   

Sabah - Good to hear you have a PMA! We are all behind you.   xx

Kamie - Sounds like you are good to go.   

AFM...some of you may remember I had spinal surgery for a prolapsed disc last Oct. So tx has been on hold since my last cycle Aug 2010  as in Sept of that year I started suffering really bad sciatica as a result of my disc prob. Really strong painkillers, alternative therapies and treatment, steroid injection...nothing worked. Had the op last Oct and have been recovering since. Still have to take painkillers but usually only paracetomol thankfully and I am slowly rebuilding my strength through Pilates and the gym.

This week my AF played a horrid nasty trick on me...It was 6 days late making me think (despite my very best efforts not to,) that I could have had a change of fortunes. Was very upset Thurs evening when it finally put in an appearance; but it has galvanised us into action. Now my back is tentatively feeling a bit better (not on painkillers every day for the first time in 18 months!) we have decided to go full steam ahead...DH took a SA test yesterday; I have an FSH test booked for Mon (will be Day 4 but clinic said this OK,) an AMH test booked for a fortnight's time; both of us have acupuncture appointments booked and we are seeing the consultant in a month when we should hopefully have all test results back. Scary but it feels proactive and like the right thing to do. In an ideal world I'd give my body longer to recover from spinal surgery but clock's ticking (am 39 in a couple of weeks and consultant said 18 months ago my egg reserve is fading fast..  )

DD cried at bedtime last night; saying she wants to be a big sister. Two of her closest friends are about to become siblings and she is really feeling it at the mo...absolutley breaks my heart.   I remember when I got pg with her I was so over the moon; I honestly thought I would never do IVF again. Now 3 cycles on we feel that if my back can stand it we'll go all out this year to try to extend our family...possibly 2 fresh cycles this year and then that's it! So praying    that 2012 is our year. 

Hope it's wonderful for all of us!

xx


----------



## sabah m

RJS welcome back     My heart breaks for DD   I cannot imagine the pain that would have caused you, not just wanting to be a mum again but making her a sister.  I am dreading those same words as my sister having number 2 in April.  Although we are blessed DS has a 16 year old half sister he sees some school holidays (she lives in Scotland, we're in London).  I too never imagined doing IVF again after DS, I had promised DH I wouldn't ask for more, and especially after the birth I was adamant I was not going to do it again....famous last words!


Really hope your health recovers swiftly from here on     Excited for you that you are getting moving, 2012 here we come xxx


----------



## eibhlin

Hi Ladies,

Great to hear you're all keeping well   

Sabah -   Delighted that AF made her appearance - fingers crossed for a positive cycle!

RJS - Welcome!  Sorry to hear about your health issues and it is so hard when DD is sad, but you're doing your best and I promise she will be very proud of all your efforts, and hopefully will have a lovely sibling as well     

I can imagine it is pretty rough and am secretly dreading DS asking for siblings and this is probably unhelpful but here goes - I was a (quite dramatic and I like to believe quite charming) only child who used to demand siblings from my mother regularly, preferably twins (poor mum!), anyway when I was 11 and she was aware my bro was on the way she took me on a very special drive (which I remember so well, cringe!) and asked if I could have anything then what I wanted most in the world and after a nano-second I said 'a double-cassette player, I'd like if it was pink or maybe red but not black, and not a ghetto-blaster necessarily, but...' and when through gritted teeth she interrupted and said, 'but yes petal, apart from you know, things, what else would you want most-est of all?' I could see she was crest-fallen but honestly didn't know what she wanted me to say so said, '...eh, well...dunno...em, a pony?!!!'  When told of imminent arrival of sibling by both parents a week or so later I did the whole hugs aren't you all fantastic thing but secretly was bit freaked out by thought of parents, ahem, doing it.  

That said when bro did arrive he was a big hit with my mates and I.  Now I probably would prefer the pony but sure that's another story!

Kuki - Hope toddy is settling in well and getting used to h(is)er's big sis's voice!  The immune tx is very intense, you're a trooper for all of this   

AFM Unfortunately our little snow-baby didn't thaw properly, we were supposed to transfer yesterday and the clinic rang in the morning.  It was not the result we'd hoped for   .  But spent the day with DH and DS feeding the ducks, visiting the sea-side and eating chips and cake.  Feeling sad, but we're so delighted to have DS and he's pure fun and mischief and joy so am determined to dust ourselves off and enjoy the hell out of him while we try to come up with a plan b!  Or actually this will be probably a plan F or G at this stage, but sure isn't life a bit like that!


----------



## desire42012

Hi Kamie

Hope u don't mind me asking how much Metformin do u take per day.?

Good Luck with your treatment


----------



## sabah m

Eibhlin I am so so sorry sweety      

Sounds like you are being very brave, take comfort in DS, they are wonderful aren;t they, and what a lovely idea to have a nice time out enjoyign nature and enjoying DS's naughty acts.  I am so sorry honey, it is crap!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Eibhlin,
I am so very sorry.. But at least this way you did not go through 2WW with hope and end up with negative. 
I lost the count what plan I am on.. But always great to have some.. And if this fails I still have 3-4 of them.. 
Come on you can do this.. Just enjoy DS and time off. Get stronger and off you go again.    
Love.Kukixx


----------



## eibhlin

Ta for the kind words   they're especially lovely as you all really understand   Currently am medicating with coffee, chocolate and on the plus side can now enjoy a few tipples on the weekend as am going out with the girls on Saturday.  

Now bring on the BFPS for 2012!!!!  Sending positive vibes around this thread      

As for me, well I like what the Doc says in Back to the Future III (watched it on the weekend) '...the future has not been written yet!'  

xox


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

Hello,

Eibhlin - so sorry your snowbaby didn't thaw    

Sabah - glad your af turned up, i'm still waiting for mine to come, is really really late now after the prostap injection, am getting little bit worried now. 

love to all,

Jess


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

Eibhlin - So sorry to here things did not work out for you. You are so right with the statement 'the future has not been written yet', stay positive.

Sabah - How is everything going for you? Are you feeling okay on the drugs?

Kuki - Stay positive!

Desire - I am on 500mg twice a day of metformin, hope this helps.

Jess - hope AF arrives soon. On my last cycle i was two weeks  late and am late again this cycle. It is worrying but try to stay positive as will show up.

Well i am feeling ill at the moment, i think i am tried and run down so plan to climb into bed in a bit and watch all my programmes on record. My drugs arrive today so we are ready to go once my AF arrives, it was due yestarday so lets see when it turns up. 

I think we have cracked the dummy situation so next is toilet training, but i think this will have to wait until this round of TX has finished.

Kamie xx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,

Eiblhlin - Thanks so much for sharing your lovely story about being an only child...made me smile lots.    Amazing that often our closest friends have no idea what to say but complete strangers on here always have the right words...thanks.

So sorry to hear about your snow baby.    Like your attitude re the future...stay strong...we all have no idea what will happen and we kinda just have to go with that...whilst being very grateful for what we have of course.   

Kuki - Hope all well?...

Kamie - Well done for cracking the dummy. My DD is a thunmb sucker...nearly 4 and I can't see her getting out of the habit although she does make an effort every now and then..it's just so natural for her.   

Sabah - Thanks for your kind thoughts and words.

I had Day 4 FSH taken yesterday; will get the results tomorrow hopefully. Stressful day at work so no time to call today!

Little glass of wine and the sofa are calling..

Take care all,

xx


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies


Did second gonal f jab tonight, can do it with my eyes shut   


One day closer to ET   


Work very stressful but keeping me sane treatment wise!  DH not well and getting on my nerves, its tiring working a hard day then getting home to do dinner and sort DS out for bed, coz DH cries off sick!!  Its only a throat infection   


Anyway, walked around 3 miles first to work then somewhere after it so feeling good my body is getting healthy again!  Planning a lot more walking into my daily life to stay motivated!  Can't keep cutting nice food out so will need to just burn more off!!


Where is the    gone ladies?   Why is she late when we need her  Kamie and Hobnob here is a little AF dance for you       


And here's a group hug to everyone else!!!  


Kuki!!!  You are pregnant!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## JLJ

Hi everyone,


Am I in the right place to chat about ttc no 3? It feels strange to say that when ttc no 1 was such an ordeal but we are giving ttc naturally a go before considering fet. I am using opk and have been getting surges on day 21 of a 35 day cycle but no luck so far. I have never had regular cycles before so feel really positive about this and hopeful. 


Hope it is ok to chat here, Jenny x


----------



## sleepypenguin

Evening all

Hi JLJ there are several of us discussing number 3 on another thread http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=278101.0 didn't even expect to have 2 this time last year good luck

Kuki I keep looking in to check your progress every day is a step closer lovely lady 

Sabah yay you are on your way, if we could find a cure to man flu we would be very rich 

Kamie and Hobnob hope AF turns up soon

   to those who have not been lucky this time I hope with all my heart your dreams come true very soon.

xXx


----------



## JLJ

Thank you for the pointer in the right direction sp x


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning my dear friends,
Sabah,
when you put it like that.. Got I am, amn't? I tell you it has been such a hard hard one. I am not enjoying it one bit.. Just worry and sick.. And injections and meds.. Yuck yuck.. As long as we get through one day at the day.. I am greatful.

SP,
Thank you darling.. On monday scan was not great in a sense of doc was rubbish at it.. But baby is doing okay.. Tomorrow I have midwife appointment I am hoping she gets me one scan for 10week or something.. But lets see. I have booked my Nuchal scan test at FMC in London. If MD does not get me scan I will get another private one to see how Toddy is doing..Yesterday was a very bad day.. Huge tummy and back aches.. Was awful.. All I thought that is it I am losing now.. It is happaning.. But had an okay sleep and this morning I feel better. So not sure what is happening.. 

Ladies, 
Who are just starting the journey, wishing billions of luck!!!

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## barnies girl

Hi all


Am new to this thread but wanted to say hi get support for number 2.


I was very lucky  to have BFP only my first ICSi  attempt in my chosen clinic in Norway and have 3 frosties there. I am going back there in 2 weeks for FET and am currently taking progynova 3 times a day. This will be our last go as we can not afford a fresh cycle so praying that it works, if not I will have to be grateful for the miracle I have already .


I guess I waited 3 years as I felt that I would be happy with one, but when my BF announced they were expecting number 2 I felt jealous. Got straight onto the clinic to get my prescription waited for AF to arrive and then booked flights and hotel.


Feeling really apprehensive so came back on heretofore get supportas this site was my saviour first time round.


----------



## wright1

Thank you for the warm welcome. I'm afraid I won't be able to post often as I don't know where the time goes with a LO and working!

Can I ask a quick question please? should be starting stimms tonight and have forgotten everthing from my last tx. Do you keep your tummy warm with hot water bottle/wheat bag during stimms to get your follies to grow? 
thanks
x


----------



## rachel1972

welcome all the newbies and good luck 

looking forward to reading all about everyones tx looks like lots of you will be up and soon.

rachelx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,

Lots of newbie's - welcome! 

Wright 1 - Yes keep tummy warm and drink a cup of milk every day. Good luck. xx

Barnies Girl - Totally identify with what you said about waiting and then suddenly feeling the urge all over again! My DD is nearly 4; we had FET when she was 15 months, then 2 x cycles of IVF when she was 2; then I had massive back problems and back surgery last year so we've had an 18 month gap. In that time everyone and their dog has had baby no. 2 (or 3!) and now DD is desperate for a sibling.    Good luck with your FET. xx

Kuki - Glad to hear scan went well...one day at a time hon. xx

Sleepypenguin...what a lovely story!

AFM...had My FSH test results...I knew it would be high as 18 months ago it was about 10 or so and consultant told us to get a move on (but then I got my back probs...  )


Not good news I'm afraid...15.4. Phew! That was a Day 4 test...does anyone know how much that is likely to have effected the result? 
Will get re-tested on the right day next month and am having AMH next week which clinic have told me is more reliable / scientific.
Too busy with crazy work to get upset....but I will say DH and I just had very open discussion about the possibility of using donor eggs. I never thought I would say this as I was adopted and I absolutley love the fact that DD looks just like me and is a real genetic link...but I am very calmly saying now; "If needs be; why not?"


Will keep you posted....


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

hello how are you all?

I've finished work for the week and feel completely shattered. Am still waiting for af and starting to get worried. Will phone clinic tomorrow, when i phoned on monday the nurse didn't seem worried at all but said to call on thurs if still no sign. Am glad that i went in to clinic rather than giving myself the injection as i'd be worried that i hadn't done it right. 

Hi Jenny - i'm also trying for number 3, 

Kuki - glad things are ok,

Barnies - good luck for Norway

Wright - Good luck with follies

Jess


----------



## sabah m

flipping heck ladies, am I still going to be as desperate even if I have a second child


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

i think for me it is about the whole experience and pregnancy - i've only been pregnant once, if that makes sense


----------



## sabah m

I understand Hobnob!! Wish I didn't but I think I will feel exactly the same even after a second pregnancy!!! Does anyone watch Corrie? OMG I was in floods of tears when Becky left with her man and step child.....I kept going on and on about it being a perfect ending to DH, he must have thought I was loopy 

Anyway, tonight I have been cranky with DS and DH...think I am doing far too much at work and having to cope there so no energy left for home. Also waking up earlier to walk and sleeping late, so tired! Don't think 2 doses of gonal f could be affecting me that much?
Came home to a £650 drug bill!!! I have only had one lot of gonal f for which I have already paid cash. I am sure nurse said this is all I will need apart from progesterone pessaries post transfer. The bill includes another gonal f(£100), cetrocide (7vials, £278.53), ovitrelle (fair enough, £58.63) and prontogest (18, £221.76).....wtf is all this for I guess this is a totally medicated cycle then?? Rang the clinic, my nurse was not there, other nurse said I should pay it and if they don't use the drugs they will send them back to the pharmacy!! As if!!!! I will pay if I am given them to use!!!!And what about the progesterone?


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

wow, that's a lot! I keep getting charged about £200 a time so it feels a bit more manageable  

just eaten a huge bar of chocolate - oops


----------



## sabah m

I want chocolate but can't afford any now!!!  They told me I was just having 1 gonal f then progesterone so thats why I am so shocked!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning Ladies,
I have my MW app to discuss coming weeks. Lets see if NHS will help me at all.

RJS,
Do not worry about tests. Most of the time they don't mean much at all. These tests changes it by the days of the month. My docs never ever bothered with these. This is just an UK thing to categorise people.. Which is alot of crap.. 
Positive attitude good diet and lots of vits.. Are the most important thing.. and for donor.. I am all for.. Good luck..

Sabah,
Prontogest is progesterone.I like what they are doing with your protocol. Making a dummy fresh cycle. Well trying to get your body think that it is.. I like it very much.. 

HQ,
Wishing you lots of luck hun too..

And hello to all our new ladies.. 

Oh Sabah, we will be always have this feeling even after 3rd one.. cos we can not have them normally.. 

Thinking of you all ladies..

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah I have been in termoil about having number 3 since DD was 10 days old. Like Hobnob said alot of it is the being pregnant bit (which I didn't enjoy 2nd time round) and that euphoria after giving birth. I keep telling myself that baby grows into a child/teenager/adult and to stop fixating on another baby, that said I cry from the opening credits of One Born and Call the Midwive   .

x


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

KUKI - Hope MW appt goes well. glad your Scan went well and everything is looking good. Hang on in there.

SABAH- hope the tiredness eases off soon. you are doing so well with the walking keep it up,   this is your time.

RJS - i am not sure about FSH levels but i know AMH is the most important test that will tell you for definite about your egg reserve. Mine is low for my age and i have been told not to wait around if i want another child as it keep dropping. Good luck with the test   

HQ - hope your AF arrives soon. It is a nightmare having to ring the nurses to say nothing has happened, during my last cycle the nurse told me it would have been stress that kept AF away and she sees it all the time. I also understand about what you are saying about the whole experience of pregnancy   this will be your time.

WRIGHT  - Good luck with stimming     vibes to help your follies to grow.

BARNIES - good luck with FET   for you.

RACHEL - how are you doing?

AFM I am still waiting for AF to arrive and getting more and more people telling me they are pregnant and will be having their second child this year. I so do not want DS to be an only child even though i keep telling myself if he is it will be okay and i so want to experience being pregnant again it was difficult last time but i did enjoy it. Hoping this will be our year  , Keep telling myself i have to stay positive.

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 

kamie thanks for asking but im having one of those days , im really p7ssed about having to go through all this ivf and my ds has special needs so im constantly questioning myself, my dh is not keen so god only knows how he will be and as im 40 this year i cant afford to delay any more, life really sucks. 

sorry ladies for being on a downer, i know i will be okay tomorrow.

good luck everyone who is on tx, xxx


----------



## kamie

Hi Rachel

Sorry to hear you are feeling down today. You know we are here for you. DH was no keen at first to start TX he kept telling me he is happy with the one. When we started TX he told me only two rounds of TX and now we are about to start TX number 3 he does not want to stop.

Hope you can get what ever questions you have answered

Sending you loads of     vibes 

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

thanks Kamie, he is so putting me thru the mill , he has got his appointment with urology consult and he is threatening not to go , i have to pay for it all, its bad enough he is infertile but then to  put me through all this extra stress is so unfair if he doesnt do it , i can t live with him.  Its so complicated!


How are you today?


----------



## kamie

Oh rachel 

It sounds like you are in such a difficult place and position at the moment. Men just do not think. DH always refused to go to any of his tests. 

I am okay today, ds is at home on fridays so my day flys by with no time to think about things. Have had my mil around and been hearing about family politics that i am not intrested in.

Hope you have a good week end. 

Kamie xx


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

hello

how are you all doing?

Rachel - that does sound really tough,    

Kamie - am sure it will be your year too, 

still no af for me, it is now ridicuously late - i don't think it's stress as normally i'm so busy i haven't been giving it much thought, but it's starting to get silly now and i don't even feel as if it's round the corner, i feel as if my body has just skipped it this month.    i have no idea what to do if i don't have af - does anyone know what happens?

have a good weekend

Jess


----------



## sabah m

hello ladies   


Kamie     how are you?


Hello Rachel     Really sorry you are having a hard time at the moment.....a few months back I had similar issues, just as starting tx DH threw a wobble and we ended up in marriage guidance.....I'm back on tx now though!!!  Really hope he starts being more supportive, totally understand age pressure but you need you two to be solid too xxx


Hobnob....naughty AF spoiling your plans too, mine was late just to wind me up for this cycle!!!


Sleepy-I guess its good for me to be prepared I will still want more no matter what!!!


Got another scan to check lining monday morning as fridays scan showed 3.7mm.  Nurse upped gonal f, but I am also taking brazil nuts, pineapple juice and using hot water bottle on my tummy-all on advice from FF!!!!  Feeling guilty as I just want to sit and indulge myself, but DH working and DS wants me to play with him.  Have had tv on all day for him.....am I a really bad mother   


Enjoy your weekends ladies xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Please take it easy on pineapple juice. It is too acidic. I would not use hot water bottle too much either..
No you are not.. Just relax and chill as much as you can..
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Thanks kuki!!!  Was just about to get another hot water bottle!  I am taking one glass of juice a day, too expensive for more!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Don't forget all these for creating eggs. Which you won't be doing.. You will have FET.. 
How is it going so far?
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Hey!


I had prayer at my church last sunday and I have to be honest definitely feeling less stressed about it all.  Spoke with manager at work and duties are being reduced from tuesday so I am pleased.  Will not need to be in work so early either so it will be good to rest.  DS behaviour very up and down   .  He is jealous of daddy    and every time I return from work he will not allow us to talk, I am his!!!  While this is very cute etc its also hard as some nights (at least 3) DH and I only see each other for an hour before he goes out for evening meetings or play rehearsals.  He is also very clingy wanting me to carry him....he stopped wanting me to carry him since he started walking at 13 months!!!I am worried how we will all cope in 2ww!!!


But apart from that vvvvvvvvveeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyy excited......it can work!!!!!  I rememebr Daisy's first BFP was from FET so mine can be too!!  There are lots of people praying for me, I have even had dreams where I am praying and not taking No for an answer!!!


----------



## RJS

Afternoon all,

Sabah - Loving that PMA...it can work and you have lots of people rooting for you. DD is always on about Jesus at the mo..said she wants him to come to her birthday party yesterday.    I have a feeling it's cause she wants to ask him direct for a sibling!

Rachel -    Sorry to hear you are having a tough time. I think DH and I are often not getting on and often it's due to the stress of ttc / tx or issues surrounding it. I know he wouldn't push to have another baby if I didn't, although he would be over the moon to have one...I think it's the effort he doesn't like...you know what men are like!   

Hobnob...AF is so often late when starting tx...I am sure it happens for a reason but drives us insane and can ruin plans. Hope yours appears soon...xx

Kamie - Those second baby announcements are tough and all seem to come at once. The Mum's of DD's best friends are due this Spring and I am surrounded by it...at work, at home and at nursery.    Got my childminder coming over with her DD for tea today so will have to sit through a lot of complaining of the perils of pg... hope one day all this will end but I will always be careful how I talk about pg/fertility / motherhood to friends just in case.

Thanks all for comments about my FSH level. Am having AMH tested this week and seeing the consultant at the end of the month so will plan properly then but so hope we can try using my eggs....

The hardest thing at mo is having all this on my mind and not telling anyone..except you lot of course!   

Have a good weekend all...nearly over already! 

xx


----------



## alexine

Hi Ladies,
I had my first scan today. Right ovary 7 follies left only 2. I guess this pretty good for my age but I had 14 on my last cycle. I'm also on gonal f this time instead of menopur...I'm hoping it gives me better quality eggs... ....hmmmm. Would love to have something put in the freezer...fingers crossed.

Hang in there everyone!     
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Alexine,
Last time in my first scan he could see about 10.. Ended up with 17 after 11 days. Lets sit and tight.. Just please relax and chill about it.
Sending   
Love. Kukixx


----------



## alexine

Thanks Kuki  ...believe me I know I am very lucky to have what I've got... In many ways... so I will just be thankful that there is something there!   I probably won't be able to cycle again after this so it's my last shot and hoping it works out okay. 

I hope you are doing okay Kuki and start to feel better soon! Good luck to you for Wednesday!   

Sending everyone lots of     
xxA


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies... scan was pants, lining 4.2mm, another dose of gonal f tonight, scan weds then friday again. Nurse said she expects it to be developed by friday ET one week after ovulation, so I guess earliest a week on friday, come on!!!!!!!

Sat with hot water bottle in lap, ate brazils and pineapple juice, what more can I do Don't feel bloated, in fact trousers looser so is it not working

Alexine-chin up, you are almost there!!!!​


----------



## alexine

Hang in there Sabah    you are almost there too!
   
xxA


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Relax. Still early.. It will get there.. get rid of anxiety so hormons can do what they need to.
PMA    
Kukixx


----------



## RJS

Ladies,

This bleeding rollercoaster eh?!...  

Sabah - Try to be calm and be kind to yourself. You ARE doing everything you can and the rest is out of our hands. Remeber that PMA...

Alexine...The cycle I got only 4 eggs was the one I got my BFP with my gorgeous girl. Reading your signature sounds like you have had quite an amazing journey.  for you.

Kuki - Hope you are well.
xx

Hi everyone else.

I am having AMH test tomorrow so hope the level isn't too low.

xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning ladies,

Rjs,
Don't worry about these tests.. They are what they are and it is only a snap shot. Not that important at all. 

I have my NHS consultant meeting at 2pm today and stupidly stressing about it. Cannot wait to get it done and see if they can be help to me at all. I so want it to be okay but I know it is probably not going to.. They always make me upset.. So why this time would be any different. Will write late.r

Wishing you all a very lucky day!!!!

Love. Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

kuki hope your appointment goes better than you except.

sabah the lining thing is a funny one when i had my last fet the nurse was convinced that the cycle would be cancelled due to lack of linning but in two days it had changed she couldnt believe it , i ate lots of beef.


----------



## sabah m

Kuki Hope it went well and they will assist you   

Rachel-thanks for the support    Lining had increased to 6.3mm which is great...another dose tonight then scan friday where I      it will have crossed 8mm.  The growth in last 2 days at higher rate than previously, I will eat lots of beef....does McDonalds count   

RJS Hope all goes ok today 

Hello to everyone else


----------



## rachel1972

yes mcdonalds does count that is what i had quaterponder with cheese go for it when do you get to indulge with no guilt.  xx


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

Hello,

Alexine - that sounds loads, you've done really well, you only need one to get a BFP so onwards and upwards

Kuki - how did it go?

Sabah - good luck with scans   

Rachel - how are you doing?

afm, it's all been a little bit crap i'm afraid. After having day 21 injection on 9th jan, still no af. I've called clinic and emailed but no response even though they promised to get bk. So nothing happening yet, hoping that this is not necessarily a bad thing

Jess


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

Alexine - sounds like you are doing well. how are you feeling on gonal f ? I will be taking gonal f with menopur this time as they want me to have more egg than last time.

Kuki - how are you doing? how did your meeting go yestarday? hope it was not to stressful.

Sabah - good luck for your next scan on Friday hope your lining has grown. i am fine thank for asking. I have been busy this week cleaning the whole house and sorting out all the junk in the house. I get like this before TX.

Rachel - hope all is well with you.

RJS - hope your AMH test goes okay. due to my AMH levels my consulton has always goes on about egg donation but it is an area we have said we will not consider until we have tried fresh cycles to see if i can get pregnant as i do not want any regrets. Low amh gives the doctors a guide.

HQ - This AF waiting game is a nightmare. 

Well i am  still waiting for AF to arrive but think it will be here soon as i feel uncomfortable. In away i am glad AF has taken its time to show as i have had two weeks on the metformin which is good and have had time to get my head around what i needed and wanted to do before starting TX. DS has a new sleeping routine which seems to be working wonders and is now back to sleeping in the afternoon which he had stopped doing since giving up the dummy. I feel like a different person this week all energised hope that is a good sign.

Has any one used cq10 for Egg quality I am taking that and 2 other vitamins and my new doctor has said i do not need to take any of the vitamins when I start stimms. I want to carry on with the vitamins but unsure when to stop using cq10 during TX

   VIBES TO EVERYONE 

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi ladies 

Kamie thats all sounds good hope af arrives soon.

hq that does sound like a long time for af. hope it is soon.

sabah how are you?

afm after last weeks nightmare with dh , he went for his bloods yesterday so hopefully he is over the fear now.  i have had no joy with ds refusing to go to nursery today (he has special needs) ive got my blood test forms from g.p.
so may go and do that today, feels like im doing something.  have to remember the end result.

hope you are all staying warm.

Rachel x


----------



## sabah m

hey Rachel    sorry things are still difficult for you!  glad DH did his bloods though   


Scan today showed triple stripe 8.2mm lining!!!     Nurse gave me final dreggs of gonal f left in two pens amounting to a final dose just to help lining along.  Got ovitrelle for sunday with FET planned following sunday!!! Soooooooooooo excited!!! Have to test surge just incase I ovulate before they planned so bought tesco's finest ovulation sticks as well as 2 HPT!!!!


----------



## rachel1972

great news Sabah!   so pleased its all looking good


----------



## The Hobnobbing Queen

Hey Sabah - that's brilliant news. Well done and good luck for FET

Rachel - sorry it's been a hard time for you   

Still no af, can't imagine it's going to come now, will ring clinic again tomorrow - for 2nd time!! Not sure what to do now. 

Jess


----------



## KG

Kuki, I would send you a PM, but iPad won't let me, so this will have to do. Been tracking you down on FF cause hadn't heard from you for a few days. Just wanted to send you hugs - loads of them. So sorry you are having a tough time.

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Thank you KG. I should know more and see what else is waiting for me. 
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

hi ladies 

how is every one doing?

well I have finally started TX. AF arrived Saturday night and had my scan yestarday and everything seemed good to go so I started my Gonal f and menopur yestarday. Back on Friday for blood test and scan to see if the dosage should change, I feel very tired and we have only had one lot of injections. 

Things are quite stressfull at the moment as my DH's grandmother took at turn for the worst on Monday morning, she has been bed ridden for over 2 years now and we have had many moments when we have thought she is ready to go but she has been holding on. However, this is it she is now on a drip and no food or water she spent a night in hospital and has come home to spend her last days. I am so worried about having EC and et and something happening to her. My DH has a big family who are all close and only a few people know about ivf and i really do not feel ready to tell them but we may have to if i am not up to running around. My plan is not to drive during 2ww and take things as easy as possible. DH has told me not to worry, this is important for us and we can not hold off on our plans to please everyone.

So miserable just feel like nothing ever goes smoothly. 

   for you all.

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi Kamie , i am sorry you are feeling so down  , try and just focus on you , dont worry about what hasnt happened and if she does pass on maybe it like one life ends in order for a new one to start it might be a sign.

hope you start to feel better soon.

hi everyone else whats occuring?

xx


----------



## alexine

Hi Girls not great news from me I'm afraid....0% fertilisation of my 10 eggs.  I posted all the gory details on the over 40's thread. They should have done ICSI but it didn't happen. It's now being looked into so fingers crossed the clinic comes up with something for me.  

Hang in there girls!     
Wishing you all the very best of luck for your txs!
xxA


----------



## sabah m

OMG Alexine      I am so so sorry for your disappointing news...cannot believe it.  Really hope the answers you get help you along our journey sweety


----------



## kamie

Alexine - so sorry to hear your news. Take care of yourself.

Rachel - Thanks  I am having a better day today, just tired. How are you? have you had any of your results back yet?

Sabah - how are you doing? Is everything still looking good for the weekend?   for you, take care.

I am finding that I am tired on the drugs and can feel my insides already. I have a scan tomorrow so will find out more about when we could be going in for EC. Ds is doing well at nursery at the moment and when I went intoday his key worker who lives two roads down from us has said if i need her to she would help by taking him to nursery when she starts in the morning and dropping off when she finishes, so now I have a plan b if i ever need it. 

It is really weird but i am not sure how i am feeling at the moment. i find myself sometimes thinking i could be pregnant soon and at other time keep thinking i do not think i could take the dissapointment of things not working. 



Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi Kamie  

Sounds like you have a good friend there if your son gets picked up for nursery what a dream.  I cant even get my son to nursery , i have had such a let down with the one he started a few weeks back,  i have sent an email saying he wont be returning.  he is very sick this week and to top it off my dh will be working away come march part of the week for good he reckons, my son is a very differcult child since birth i think he was damaged.  im starting too wonder how i will cope on 2ww let alone a baby.  my son is extreamley hard work he doesnt sleep well either.  having said all that really want a baby just pray he/she is a bit more cpmpliant with the world.

how is everybody, sabah are you all booked for et?

rx


----------



## sabah m

Rachel, just want to give you a big hug honey     hard enough with terrible twos here than with the issues you are struggling with and DH going to be away.  If you are blessed with a pregnancy you WILL cope just fine    Have you heard of cranial osteopathy?  If you think DS may have had some trauma at birth I  heard it can help.  My DH's osteopath advertised it recently.


Kamie, I have been very tired and didn't think it might be the drugs....I could go to sleep at DS's bedtime too   


All set for saturday, soooooooooooo excited.  Like you Kamie, I flit between believing it will work to imagining the disappointment just to build resilience!!! I have good friends who are totally going to indulge me and come eat at as many chinese buffets I can manage for 3 days if I get a BFN.  They have limited me to that I don't undo all my hard work with weight watchers    I also walked past a costa coffee and thought I'd like a hot chocolate with lots of cream and a cake without thinking of the sensible option.......so I guess it will be ok either way        2 more sleeps!!!


Alexine honey, how are you?


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Goodluck for tomorrow.. It has gone so quick.. Stay positive.. All going to be okay..

Rachel,
Life can be hard with special needs. Give yourself plenty time.. And get orgnanise you don't stress so much..Not going to be easy for sure.. But you can do it.. 

Kamie,
Good luck with the next cycle.. 

I am feeling a bit better. Don't ask me why but it feels better. Not sure what is happening.. Sugar levels are still high although I am doing all I can.. 
Still swallen but not so painful.. Something getting better.. not sure what.. 
Tomorrow morning I have to go to my intralipidis drip treatment I am sure it is going to make things worse but Dr. Gorgy says I should have it so I will have. I don't want to put baby at any risk.. So needs to be done.

Thinking of you all girs.

Lots of luck and love. 

Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi Ladies 

thanx for your words of support.

Sabah hope it all goes well tomorrow.

kuki so glad you feel a bit better.

afm didnt hear from the nursery it is now a week since they left a fowl message on my machice, i dont think they can be bothered with us.  now got him at home , cant wait till it gets warm and we can be outside more.  we still have snow on the ground here.

Have a great weekend 

love Rachel x


----------



## Kuki2010

Rachel,
It is snowed last night in here. And all day a bit on and off. I am in Herts Radlett. Just enjoy the snow with E. He must love it no? Can you contact another nursery? You push them. Don't wait for their phone call? 
Love.Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

hi kuki 

i have left a message and sent an email no response.  E  has been very ill this week, we did go out in snow yesterday for a little bit. but he is still sickl.x


----------



## sabah m

Kuki-really glad you are feeling better, long may this continue     come on toddy, be strong and keep growing for your mummy   


I can't believe I am finally here, one more sleep, have been planning this for a year!!!!  Had a little panic and a few tears earlier, this is it, our last chance....please God, we need a miracle     


DS been very very difficult, pushing boundaries constantly, its left me very stressed today, but sister having him tomorrow, ET is at 12pm, and I will ask DH to take him out in the afternoon.  However DH out tomorrow night, a close friend's 60th, I am not going but it means i have to do battle with DS at bedtime unless i let him sleep with me, I guess its worth the stress free night!!!

I am very very excited, someone on the FET thread had her one and only embie thaw and transferred today so at least one of mine should make it      I still want twins though   


When I post tomorrow, I will be PUPO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## KG

Sabah, wishing you lots of luck for tomorrow!

Kx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah Good luck for tomorrow will be thinking of you, I know in your heart you already know this but stress with your DS really won't make a difference to the outcome   .

Kuki Been following your diary   all ok with you and Toddy.

 To those not so lucky lately it is such a hard 'journey'.

SP
xx


----------



## kamie

Hi 

Sabah-  good luck tomorrow   for you. It is so difficult i can not turn my back for one second with DS now i keep finding him at the top of his toy draw standing trying to put cds in his cd player. Just do what you can, as long as DS is happy you will be fine.

Rachel- sounds as though you are having a nightmare with the nursery at the moment. I think if they are not willing to meet your sons Needs you may need to look at other nurserys is this and option? We also have snow here garden is still all white, ds wants to keep going out in his new wellies.

Kuki- sorry to hear things have been difficult . Hope tomorrow goes well and it is not to stressful. take care of yourself and toddy.   for you.

We had day three scan and i feel rubbish, right side nothing, left side three follicles ranging from 16 to 11 i need more follicles as over half are always empty. could not bear another cycle with no eggs. I Have been asked to stay on the same does of gonalf and menopur  and start the orgalutron tonight. Have to go back on monday for another scan and more bloods. I keep telling myself it only takes one.

we are not sure but DS has a few spots on stomach area and i think he has chickenpox, he is fine in himself so will wait and see what morning will bring.Just feels like another hurdle we have to over come during this tx. 



Kamie xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Good luck!!! Just relax.. please try.. Let it be.. Nothing will effect you chill about things.. Thinking of you this morning..    

Kamie,
Thank you. I have got up cold has gone worse. But good news is I don't have to take Lara with me. Dh will take care of her.. So glad I am going own my own.. 
Yes you only need one.. Don't worry about numbers so much.. One great quality would do nicely..   

Rachel,
I hope he gets better soon and you sort out the nursery situation.. You might have to go there full stop and talk to face to face.. Good luck.. Not easy..    

KG,
How is life with two precious? Enjoying?

SP,
What about you? Hope life is good and fun..  

I am so not looking forward to today but I have to do it.. I hope it will be okay.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Thank you ladies for all your well wishes.......I am officially on 2ww, I will never be able to wait till then so I am sure by tuesday I will have done at least 1HPT!!!!!!They thawed fine, 80-85% survived. 2 blasts graded BB. One had hatched which meant ready to implant. The guy said although there is no guarantee we should be quietly confident....what does that mean? We always get given good odds and it hasn't worked so I need to take that with a pinch of salt!! It was the most uncomfortable transfer of all, they did not show me on the screen when it was inserted or give me a photo Anyway, was over the moon as we left and went to the McDonalds next door as we have after every transfer....on way back to the station realised I had left my handbag there....I ran back towards it before realising I was running, then was so upset i did this. I got my bag back, but was so upset all the way home for being so stupid  Took my Bible out and prayed lots on way home, I felt God was trying to reassure me it would be ok but of course I am scared I have ruined my chances.Finished decorating DS's room, Thomas the tank engine, it looks great! Really weird I have not felt ready to change it from its baby theme until now...maybe I know I will have a new baby and don't need DS to fulfill that need now? This is going to be the longest 2ww ever!!!!!!

Kuki hope that it doesn't take it out of you today, will it be the last one?


----------



## sleepypenguin

Well done Sabah on being Pupo yet again PLEASE don't worry about running it really won't affect the outcome, would have been a lot more stressfull to not get your bag back and those ruddy pee sticks away   .

Kuki how did it go hunni? Pretty good here permanently knackered but really can't complain DS just been diagnosed with asthma which in many ways is a relief after 2 years of trips to GP, A&E & overnight hospital stays. Just got to get the inhalers into him and then hopefully he will grow out of it. DD seems to be going the same way but hopefully will be picked up quicker.

Have a restfull weekend everyone.

x


----------



## rachel1972

sabah hope your wait goes quickly and the outcome is positive.  i dont think a little run would undo anything, it maybe good  a little blood circulating.  

hi kuki, kamie,sheepy and hobbknob sorry if i missed anyone


afm anyone made a cake and forgot to put sugar in?  shows just how stressed i have been.

love and light x


----------



## kamie

Sabah - PUPO yeah. hope the 2ww is not to stressful. take care of your self thinking of you and   for you.  

Rachel - I am not good at baking, always make mistakes and cakes end up in bin. Take care of yourself hope you find a way of relaxing.

Kuki - hope you are still having better days. Thinking of you.

HQ - how are you doing ?

DS has chicken pox for sure so we are back to sleepless nights at the moment, he will be at home all week with me so I am not going to get much time to do anything. Ds is fine during the day eatting and running around but it is at night the itch is getting to him. By 3pm i am tried and due to DH grandmother being on her last legs in laws are not popping around to see Ds and can not help look after him unless it is for our hospital appointment so am feeling a bit stressed and tried at the moment. Also MIL has said she will not be able to help during 2ww and ds is a handful now. 

Have scan tomorrow so wait and see what that shows, please let there be more follicles on both sides.



Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Kamie , hope you are able to get some rest, MIL sounds helpful, not!  I limit all contact with mine she is a complete idiot the things she has said and done to me.  when i was pg the first day she saw fit to call me and tell me about all her M.C.  sounds like your son is not feeling too bad though.  hope he recovers swiftly are you going to inform the clinic of the situation? x


----------



## kdb

Hi ladies, just bookmarking    Our son was born in July last year and we are hoping to do FET this coming summer 

Obviously it's going to be a *very* different experience, trying to find the energy and time to give our FET the best chance of success whilst looking after Daniel, so am hoping to see lots of success stories on this thread - and of course, any tips and advice for juggling treatment and motherhood!

Best of luck to you all, looking forward to getting to know you 
xoxo


----------



## sabah m

Hello and welcome KDB....this is a very supportive thread and I really hope your journey ends with another lovely baby  It is definitely different trying to juggle appointments with a LO, and trying to make an excuse this morning why I wasn't dressed for work as DH took him to nursery  But it will all be worth it   

Rachel-you are talking about your MIL which is kind of to be expected  but my mother very helpfully (not) suggested I take complete bedrest for 2ww so I told her (again!!!) I would be taking the Dr's advice who said not to take bed rest as need blood to circulate to which she said yes you took their advice twice before and look what happened!!!!!!       my sister was sat next to me and said cut her out for 2ww as she will be the only thing causing me stress!! How is E, what are you thinking about the nursery situation xxx

Kamie-   is it chicken pox and will you have to delay tx if it is??

KG & sleepy   how is it going with your second miracles, is it very different?

Hobnob-havent heard from you for a while??

Alexine    let us know how you are sweety xxx

Kuki-hope you are recovering from saturday and other symptoms clearing. xxxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

I have read up on chicken pox and we have both had it so their is no risk to me if i get pregnant. DS has starte to scab over so by wednesday he will be over infectious stage. Nursery has said as soon as he has scabbed over he can come back and all sites say 5 days off nursery from onset which will be tomorrow.

This morning DH's grandmother passed away, so mil has already rang a friend to come and look after DS as she will not be able to. Luckily SIL has come home from work so has said she will be here at 3pm so we can leave for hospital. Glad DH gone to work as he is already upset with his mum and does not want people ds has never stayed with to look after him. I was already to go to hopsital on own but DH hates missing an appointment as he feels left out and feel this is his role through TX to be by my side.

Also to top everything off this morning a friend i have made whose son is same age as ds has told me she is pregnant. She felt bad telling me as she knows about ivf and we have been talking about have a second child. I am happy for her as she has been a good friend when i have been going through TX,  but am sad it is not me as she has the dates  of my last TX. Also husbands cousin is pregnant and has the same dates as my last TX and will have to see a lot of her ove the next few week.
   .

Please please let todays appointment go well


----------



## sabah m

Oh honey,       it sounds like a really hard time at the moment.  I am sure you will get some good news at your scan and feel you are on your way to baby number 2 too.  Sorry for your loss, its so nice DH is so protective and wants to be by your side in all this.  Why is is so hard when others get pregnant     ??  I am upset about your friend for you, when is it going to stop stinging like this


----------



## kamie

Oh sabah

Tell me about it.  Mil has now put a spaner in the works by saying none of my in laws can have son today as it is bad luck and could make ds' is chicken pox worse, she belives in a lot of mubo jumbo. But now she has said it i will not have them look after ds as i do not want any bad luck at the moment. Just told DH who is upset at his family, i do not want any one looking after ds he needs to be comfotable so dh needs to do this and i need to go on my own to appointment. That is life and none of us ladies have had it easy, so just another thing i have to do.

How you feeling today?

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 

welcome kdb hope we are not scaring you too much. 

Sabah I can understand you are frustrated with your mothers comment but she obviously loves you very much and wants it to work out.  dont get stressed try and stay calm and think only good thoughts if possible. i wish my mother or anyone would be here for me.  

I am very sick today had af arrive and was vomiting but i think it might be the bug that E had last week.  am now in bed as got dh to come home but he is very  busy at work and is not happy.  made me think if i was pg with sickness which i had last time it would be alot harder with ds to care for and police he is such a little monkey, he got dogs water and poured into the food when my back was turned.

Kamie  how did you get on.  I think its great the dh is so supportive but it isnt the same now you have ds and he will just have to realize that things change.  sorry you dh s family are being so unsupportive must be hard. glad you can still carry on even with the chicken pox present.  Hope funeral is ok if you are attending?  

today has made me realize how much i need my dh so in a way its a good thing cos we havent been getting on.  

love to all xx


----------



## sleepypenguin

*Sabah* with number 2 you worry less, it goes quicker and you are amazed at how much you have forgotten from first time round ( even with a small gap like ours) oh yes and you are permanently knackered 

*KDB* Welcome and good luck with the coming months

*Kamie *Sorry for the loss of your DH grandmother. Hope your appointment went well today.

*Rachel* Hope you are soon feeling better, your comment about DS putting water in the dogs food made me laugh my DS is always doing that to the cats food little blugger  .

Got to go DD just woken up just as I have put nail polish on and DH away all week so will have to smudge it the glamour of motherhood ( and I wouldn't have it any other way)

     to everyone.

x


----------



## sabah m

Rachel     sorry things are difficult with DH, it does make you realise how much harder it would be on your own.  DH and I were in a very bad place last year, ended up in counselling and sorted through a lot of bad habits.  He's making a lot more effort to get involved this time, secretly I had thought if we split up I would be straight off to a sperm donor clinic    but I know things would have been very hard.    hope its not causing added stress, you need to be in a happy place xx


kamie-hope it all went ok after all the upset of the day    


AFM nothing much to report, a few bouts of nausea but not sure if I brought it on myself    the power of thought!!  I even gagged when I went for a walk to get things circulating a bit!! Went for an early valentine's day treat, chinese buffet my fave     I was very self controlled and only had a bowl of soup and 2 plates of food


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Kdb welcome sorry was having a mad day yestarday did not get a chance to say hello.

Sabah - look after your self,  how are you feeling? What are you doing for your 2ww wait? Are you lifting ds and doing normal household duties. Was speaking to DH last night and not sure what i should do this time if we get to 2ww.

Rachel - your son sounds like mine can not turn your back for a second. It gets tiring as you are on the go all day. Have you made any decisions about the nursery or just going to let it be? Hope you are feeling bette today and DH is able to help out a bit with ds.

Kuki thinking of you.

Sleepypenguin - hope you get a chance to have you time when DH gets back.

Scan went well i have 7 follicles on left side 5 are around the same size and 2 small they have kept me on the same dos of drugs and think ec will happen friday. Right ovary has packed up a no follicles. 

I am okay today waiting for my parents to come down to see us for an hour and then they are off to pay respects at my in laws. Dh is coming home for a bit before spending the afternoon with his family. I think i will end up going when dh comes home late aftenoon for two hours and then come home to have injections before dh leaves again. I think this is what things will be like for a while. Will find out today but looks like funeral thursday so my parents will have my son. 

Mil came ove this morning and went on about how my son should go nursey thursday so my parents can come to funeral, at which i said not possible and then she said the family have said my son came come to funeral, which is when i went mad. Our funerals are open casket at home before you go to crematoriam. How dare they think this appropriate for a two year old. Dh was not suprised by comments he had said last night if any one says about son going to funeral be clear and say no, i told him that no one was suggest such a thing. ( how wrong was i ).

Have scan tomorrow so wait and see what hospital say. Oh i told them about the chicken pox and they confirmed if we are sure we have both had it nothing to worry about.

hope everyone has a good day. Take care.


----------



## rachel1972

kamie how awful that they are putting such presure on you at this precious time.  hope you can find a way to stay calm through the madness.x


----------



## sabah m

Kamie     sorry you are having to cope with all the family issues at a time you need to be centre of attention    really shows how in tune you and DH are though so keep looking after each other.  I am very lucky my sister lives next door so she is helping out with DS, putting him into car etc for nursery so I am not lifting at all.  DH is doing lifting at home, even if DS demands I am the one who changes him or puts him to bed    I have told him I have hurt my back and am not allowed to lift him and he is ok with that.  He is still getting lots of cuddles and seems happy enough, when he isn't being the little monster!!!  What do you ladies suggest I do about his food fussiness, I used to offer lots of alternatives but he will be 3 in May so I am getting tired of this, have tried to be firm and say he eats what we are having or goes to bed hungry then I feel guilty later and give an alternative   


Been feeling really pants like it has not worked but I feel my spirits are lifting, it can work


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah is DS at nursery if so does he eat well there? if he does then  I would not give him a choice at home as you know he will eat. They are clever little things and turn all sorts of things into a battle. We have been very lucky that DS has always eaten anything and everything but have friends whose kids won't eat certain things at home but eat everything when out   .

x


----------



## KG

Sabah, wishing you loads of luck on 2ww. I'm afraid I am quite tough on food fussiness & ds can be quite fussy - I think it's a control thing, they know we can't force them to eat. I don't make him eat things I know he doesn't like, but if he refuses food without trying it, or things I know he likes then he gets no alternatives. I will give fruit or yogurt afterwards, though, regardless of whether he's eaten his main course as I'd prefer he thinks of those as a healthy part of his meal, not a treat. If I really think he is hungry, I may give him a healthy snack a lot later, when it can't be connected to not eating his dinner. 

Kx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 

sabah sorry you are not feeling too good today.  

my son has sensory issues (basically a huge pain in the a!se) i dont fight over what he eats cos i just need him to eat but what i have found is that if you have a fruit bowl he will eat lots of fruit cos he can see it and take it for himself so i would suggest doing similar.  xx

afm very stressed out today my son has been asking to go to indoor play centre and i knew it would be busy but it was heeving and he attacked a little girl , he has lots of behavioural problems which are sensory linked we think, but i had to take him out in his sox as he was kicking off it is so exhausting, distressing and embarrassing.  I know i want a baby but god knows how it will be but he will be at school by then so at least i will get some peace.


----------



## sabah m

Do you know what rachel, he sounds like a very normal little boy of his age, my niece is 4 and recently bit her best friend whom she has play dates with all the time on the ear, a fight over something petty!!!  Sounds like you are taking a lot of responsibility, other mums do understand when their kids get slapped / bitten during play etc as all our children do it at some stage.  Stop being so hard on yourself honey    What are his sensory issues, I am ignorant I'm afraid    Have you had any support for this, and have that ridiculous nursery got back to you.  Surely someone there would be trained to know how best to support Ethan (and you!).  I often get advice from the nursery teachers as frankly sometimes they have much better ideas about discipline than me, I was brought up with slaps across the face so am not ashamed to ask advice as I am not going to follow my mum's example!!


KG thanks for the advice especially still giving the fruit / yoghurt as I know he will eat that.  He has started being more fussy at nursery too so I think it is a control thing.  Its so frustrating as i followed the Contented little baby's weaning guide and he always ate everything and she says if you always make home cooked food they will never turn out fussy      as I have spent so much time and money on cooking!!! When he refuses fish fingers and chips I know its a control thing.  I just didn't know how to respond.  I guess I will just continue to offer the fruit or yogurt, we don't usually have puddings, but it was sad yesterday as i bought a trifle which he loves and said he could not have pudding if he didn't have dinner......then gave him a hot cross bun 2 hours later as I knew he must be hungry!!!


----------



## rachel1972

thanks sabah , he is far from normal though, we are just not able to certian things with him and he has not got any friends as he scared all the children away by the time he was 3yrs old.  so enjoying an afternoon at home with the radio on and the playdough out he is happy.  and so am i for now.


----------



## sabah m




----------



## rachel1972

hi all how r u doing today?

I have just been to get my blood taken at local hospital and was asking if the core b is included, she couldnt help me and then she said i was "lucky" that my gp was doing the tests , i calmly said i wasnt lucky my dh has C.F and that it was a good thing that i was saving a couple of hundred pounds towards the thousands i needed for I.C.S.I.  im really fed up with attitude to it being lucky to get help to have a baby, its not like i delayed having them or something within my control. grrrrr


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Have just got home from EC went well and we have four eggs. Now just have to wait for call tomorrow.  Plan is to rest today am happy as after the nightmare week we have had i feel thinks are moving forward.

Will come back later to do personels as tired 

Xx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kamie well done on EC, quality not quantity is the key in this palava, hope your not too sore and get looked after over the coming days.

xXx


----------



## sabah m

Woo hoo kamie    Rest up and enjoy time before crazy 2ww!!! Lets hope we are both celebrating by mid march!!!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning ladies,
Yes Sabah, we will celebrate!!! Kamie good luck!!
Thinking of you all.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Kuki!!!!!! How are you, and the lovely toddy?? Hope you are feeling much much better, are you done with immune drugs now?




So, I could not resist any longer (although yesterday was the only day I have not tested!)....this morning I used a pound shop test......very very very faint second line......my sister lives next door so I called her over so she could also POAS as is pregnant.  I wanted to know if her line showed up in the same place, as it was not directly next to test line.  Her line was in same position!!!!! Dare I believe it has happened?  I have left my last clearblue digital for tomorrow, 8dp6dt as tested positive with DS at this point.  I just want to be able to enjoy today thinking I have my    incase this is the last time i ever get to write these words and believe them        please God let it be true.


Kamie     for brilliant fertilisation xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Oh Sabah,
You made my day.. Come on!!! Going to happen.. Wonderful news... 
Enjoy your day.. Really enjoy.. Mxxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Sabah yeah you have done it. From what i have heard on this site a positive is a positive so enjoy and celebrate. Congrats yeah. ................ .

Kuki you have got to 12 weeks so happy for you. I know this has been difficult for you. Take care and thinking of you.

Yeah we got four eggs and three have fertilised so have transfer midday Monday. Things still difficult at home but will focus on that another time.

Hope every one else is okay have a great weekend.


Xx


----------



## sabah m

kamie I am so scared to believe it    but so so very grateful to have got to this position.  DH said he knew it had worked, just panicking about finances if its twins....I have no worries at all.  Really please for your embies, and really     other things settle so you can focus on monday.


Rachel-hope you are ok    


Kuki-how are you doing?  I hadn't realised 12 weeks, amazing!!!!!!Do you know what, if this sticks then all of us who were on the thread when I joined it more than 2 years ago, that stayed on it have had their BFPs that have eventually stuck!!!!  Kamie-I have high hopes for you too     I have had a lot of prayer this cycle, prayer works!!


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Good luck for monday. Just think positive and ignore the rest....    

Sabah,
I am still haning in here till next week test results. Once I am out of steriods I am sure life will be better. For that I need to get to 16th week.. So another month or so. One day at the time..
Sooooo happy for you.. Keep on praying.

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

Sabah hope it is true and it is + again tomorrow xx

good luck monday Kamie.


----------



## sabah m

Clearblue said pregnant 1-2 weeks this morning     

I have hoped and tentatively imagined sitting where I am this morning but not been able to visualise it  . I believe God can do miracles but just did not think he wanted to do it for us......how wrong was I    Although my previous BFNs make no sense, feels like just wasted money, God's timing has been right for us. many of you know DH never wanted children, nor did I when we met  and although he relented for one go, not thinking it would work he certainly did not want more. We had marriage guidance last year as we nearly split up days before my cycle started, I felt sick to the core! Never in a million years did I think we would be here now!!!!!

Love to you all,       everyone will get to celebrate their dreams coming true soon xxxxx


----------



## Kuki2010

Darling Sabah,
I am delighted with your news!!! Wonderful!!!! 
What is the day today? 
I am soooooo excited.. 
Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah well done you   for the coming months. Despite everything with DH hope he is happy about the result. (my DH never was never bothered about having kids either ironic really as we had MF issues in the end.)

Have a good Sunday everyone sun is out we are off to the beach.

x


----------



## rachel1972

great news sabah xxx


----------



## sabah m

sleepy-where are you? The beach

I am 8dp6dt

Thanks everyone


----------



## sleepypenguin

Sabah we are lucky enough to be in the westcountry it was very busy but lovely in the sun even the ice cream shops that dont usually open until easter were open so we indulge would have been rude not too   .

x


----------



## sabah m

woah!!! flippin' freezing in London


----------



## Kuki2010

SP,
Oh so lovely.. Enjoy it for us too. 

Sabah,
I am on a high with you positve this weekend. Wonderful news.. 

Love to you all and wishing a great week.

Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Kuki!!!! I am on a high for us too!!! Can you believe we are both finally pregnant I will wait for your scan and all clear, my scan is 6th march then we will have to meet to celebrate for sure!!!!  My GP has been so lovely, saved me £600 by prescribing my next lot of prontagest as is needed till 12 weeks!!!




kamie hope goes smoothly today, you will be PUPO!!!!!!!


----------



## KG

Sabah, I am so excited for you! Amazing news. This is the year for you and for Kuki - the best news!

SP, typical for it to be lovely weather at home when we were away for the weekend! 

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi dear KG and SP, hope you two are doing well.

Yes darling Sabah.. We'll meet up and celebrate!!! for sure.. KUkixxx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Sounds like everyone had a good weekend.

Sabah i am so happy for you. Yeah...........

Kuki glad you are on a positive at the moment. How are you feeling on the metformin. I have been taking it this cycle and it does make your stomach go funny. Take care of yourself.

Sp and kg hope things are going well for you both.

Rachel how are things with you?

Well i am Pupo! !! 
Transfer seemed to go well yestarday first time i have had day 3 transfer. Both embryos grade 2++ one was a 7cell and the other was 5cells.  So i have one that is on track and one that is lazy. Made dh laugh as whe we had ds embryo was 3 cells on day 2transfer. So hop the odd numer is lucky for us.

I have had a chilled out morning and plan is to go down stairs in a while and catch up on some tv viewing. I think today i will pamper myself.

Take care all 

Kamie xx


----------



## sabah m

yipee kamie!!! Enjoy this precious time, where is LO?


sleepy and KG do you remember how much you lifted LOs at the start of pregnancy?  The nursery have asked to have another go with potty training DS, I am worried about lifting him as have not done it during 2ww, he is being very patient as I have told him I have a bad back, poor love.  I absolutely love lifting and carrying my boy, he is still my baby...


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kamie     Congratulations on being Pupo. Never really understood the cell thing but I know DS was a 4 cell. Enjoy your pamper.

Sabah As I didn't find I was pg until 6 weeks life pretty much carried on as usualand DS was only 13 months and on the small side. I really don't think you can do any harm to the baby by lifting BUT I am 99% sure I had SPD this time because of picking up DS and am still suffering from it so be careful.

xXx


----------



## rachel1972

hi everyone 

Kamie that all sounds very good , enjoy the quiet time today. xx

Sabah - hope you taking it easy. xx 

Kuki how are you feeling now?

love to all xx


----------



## kamie

Thanks all

Ds is at nursery for the next three days so i will get to chill out and not have to rush around. DH is being even more proactive this time and has said he will take Mondays and Fridays off for the next two weeks as long as he can and we could spend the time as a family as ds not at nursery. DH is self employed so it is possible and also his business partner has been taking time off as they have just had there second child and i think dh is feeling as thought every one goes on about how tough it is having a second child but they do not understand what we are going trough and decided it is about time he looked after all of us as a family. Also this time we do not want mil involved as much.

Sabah could you not hold off until your scan for toilet training, it is tough enough toilet training at the best off times. We have tried but ds not ready will just have to wait till right time.

Sp i do not understand the cell thing either at our old hospital never really bothered to tell us a lot and never really asked. If it is going to work it will.

Rachel hope you are able to get out and about with ds as it is not as cold as it has been.

   this will be our time 

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Kamie that sounds like an excellent plan keep mil to a minimum after the way she bahaved and it is good that dh wants to take time off to be with you , how nice, he sounds like a good man. sending you massive sticky vibes


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi ladies,
We made it from our mad day. 
My results came as Trisomy 21;1 in 1007 and Trisomy 13/18;1 in 1824. Doc said no need for any insvasive tests so I will go with what she says. With DD it was 1 in 2970. But I was 36. This time 41.

We could not find the sex. But Doc said it could be a girl. So Toddy might be a girl. Was a bit shock to me.. The heart rate is quiet high as 159bpm. I think that is in line with a girl hb rate.Girsl attend to have high rate and boys lower.. It started very low but last 3 weeks are very high now.. So we have no idea.. I hope we can find out soon. But anyways Toddy is looking great so far.. Very very relieved. 

We came from London than went to Watford to do all the other blood tests for tomorrow's meeting. Now we all need for white cells issue to go away so we can relax a bit. 

Toddy is upto date with its dates. It is 59.2mm. Exact dates 12+3. So far so great. 

Want to do tomorrow with Dr. S. And hopefully we can have a little celebration. 

One concern was Toddy was not moving that much. Not a very active baby. A bit of worry. Lara was ever so active.. On every scan.. I suppose every baby is different.. 

Worry won't stop tiill it comes to my arms. Still one day at the time. So far Toddy is doing wonderfully.. 

I hope you all having a good day.

Love to you all. 

Kukixx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kuki that all sounds very positive fantastic news. I like the way your Dr said Toddy could be a girl, unless things have changed recently there is a 50:50 chance either way   . Good luck for tomorrow.

x


----------



## Kuki2010

Hi dear friends,

Yesterday went well. No more abnormal cells and numbers are almost normal. I can not tell you how happy I am.. Now I can jsut get one with the rest.. 
Having awful headaches but that is cos of steriod tapering off. Today I am on 25mg..

Kamie, how is it going?

Sarah, you okay?

SP, we thought toddy was a boy.. But scanner said more likely to be a girl.. So we were shocked. But she added she could not have very clear vision of it all. So next scan maybe we find out for sure.. We want to know as soon as possible so I can get rid of some thtings from here and parents.. What ever it is we do not care.. As long as it is healthy.. 

Love to you all. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

brilliant news Kuki!!!     are the steroids the last of the medication?  you must be so relieved, I still think Toddy is a boy   !!! Glad you feel you can finally relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy....how is diabetes?


Kamie-how is it going?  Hope you are not going made on your 2ww!!  We told the nursery I was newly pregnant and they reverted back to nappys, especially as DS weed twice and pood once in big boy pants and didn't bat an eyelid    


I have told DS there is a baby in my tummy, he gave a really happy smile and said he wants a brother, probably as the cousin he is closest with's mummy (my sister) is having a brother    fine by me, I know its a boy, Isaac is coming    DH thinks there are 2, I don't.  Its amazing how he's changed, worried I might lose it, feeling relieved every time I gag (!) and even made me do another test this morning!!!  It wasn't even first pee, and line came up before control line    I have God's assurance it will all be fine now so not anxious at all   


Rachel-what's the progress with you?


Sleepy and KG-how are you both?


----------



## KG

Sabah, lovely to hear you sounding so relaxed. I meant to come back and say that I did lift T when I was pg, but not as much as usual, just when I really had to. If I lifted him from the floor I got him to jump as I picked him up, which made it less of a weight, or got him to stand on a stool and lifted him from there. logically I don't think lifting is problem, but I wasn't quite that brave. I didn't carry him around, but I did lots of getting down to his level for cuddles. 

life is good here, thanks, if a bit hectic and exhausting!

Kx


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
So happy for your daring.. Wonderful.. Just enjoy.
No steriods are not the last. But is the main causes for diabeties docs things. So I am hoping once they go down to 0mg a day. I should get rid of diabeties.. I have to say it jsut sucks.. 
I will be on clexane injections till not sure when. Dr. Gorgy says till 32 weeks. NHS says I might have to use it till birth.. I would like to stop it now.. I cannot touch my tummy cos of broozes.. 
I am on thyroxine well that will be on till bith. And Diabetic med. metformin which is just disgusting.. Docs saying my body shoudl get used to it.. I am waiting that to happen.. Makes me feel awful.. 
I have been very down. I am trying to lift myself up.. 
But so very happy for you.. Super.. 

KG,
How is life with two boys?

Kamie,
You are so quiet. Hope it is well with you?

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Thanks for all thinking off me. 

I am well as can be. I have spent the last three days chilling taking my meds on time as tablets morning and evening and cyclogest three times a day. I have spent the mornings talking to my mum on the phone and taking my time getting dresses and the rest of the day watching films and catching up with tv viewing as well as light duties around the houses and walking. Life is going at a slow pace but DH is home more than last time as he is picking ds up from nursery so we have time together as a fsmily in the evening and today he and ds are at home so we are going out for lunch and will spend the aftenoon together.

I have been having werid dreams and last night all my dreams were about being pregnant. Hope that is a good sign. I am fine inmyself getting a few twinges but nothing to write home about. Feeling hungrey all the time and then when i eat i feel sick.

This time i have not been offered a blood test i have to use the pregnancey test kit they have givn me on 5th march. I do not think i am going to hold out and plan to test some time late next week do not want to do it to early.

Sabah- glad all is working out. Take care of your self.

Kuki- be strong you are getting closer to your dream of holding toddy everyday that goes bye. The metformin should get easier.

Rachel - hope the good weather has ment you have been able to get out of the house with DS. Have you got any further with plans for tx. Thinking of you.

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies sounds like everyone is in a good place today.

afm had my appointment at create i was told i have pco and not a good flow of blood the consultant was not worried about it though said i have very good egg reserve so that is nice to know but she suggested doing mild ivf to get more chance with icsi being needed but i could do natural ivf aswell so now i dont know what to do but she has sent me for more bloods and i have to arrange the ssr as it is all on the basis that sperm will be retrived.  Dh being an absolute idiot as usual doesnt want to talk about it nothing new there.  all going to be left for me to decide alone.  He really isnt cut out for marriage at all.  Ethan is now at home no more nursery for him so been swimming twice this week and a special needs playgroup.  

have a good weekend all xx


----------



## sabah m

Rachel     It sounds like you are coping with a lot on your own right now and holding it all together.  Although I was the one who pushed for baby no.2, DH did know it was going to be easier long term to have two children (at his age!) than just the one.  Its so hard to progress through such a stressful process with little support...I know at times I just pretended things were not happening to make them go away, ie when it was clear he was not going to sign consent forms as we were close to breaking point.  Take care of yourself honey, you can't do this all on your own and be emotionally stress free for tx.


----------



## rachel1972

thanks Sabah , you seem to off been thru similar resistance from dh , it is so nice to know you are not the only one as tx can be such a lonely experience when your dh is not on board seems to be a bit of a taboo to some people but i did tell consultant and she was very understanding.  

Got my long hair cut of in a bob today had my nails done too all for £20. got deal on groupon it was fab, going to get it coloured i think before tx as i want wont to if i fall pg.  also had a sunbed and the special offer for 1hour runs out on wednesday but decided not to buy as i wont be going on if pg.  so just need dh to grow up and be a man! and everything will be fine.  so happy the sun is shinning really makes me feel positive.#

lots of love to all xxxx


----------



## sabah m

LOL I just love groupon, although stupidly buy stuff for others then always regret forgetting myself, need to good haircut too.  Its good your consultant knows.....the thing that is so frustrating is that whether the dad's want them or not, its always the mother that does the most, so why do they resist it     It also makes me laugh you saying grow up and be a man, my DH is 51 and I often think the same   


Kamie-I meant to write the other day then must have forgot, have you resisted the pee sticks     Really hope other symptoms are good signs!!  Vivid dreams seem common


----------



## Kuki2010

Thinking of you girsl.. 
Kamie,
You nearly there.. 
Rachel,
Some man or some women never grow up.. Don't wait for him.. You just get on with it and get things done.. 

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

How is everyone? 

Rachel you are strong and do what your heart tells you? Nice that you are getting out with DS.

Kuki and Sabah take care of your self and enjoy the sun.

Well i am okay was at home alone yestarday as dh andds went to inlaws for a ceremony i was quite good at telling everyone that i was not going as there was going to be 90 people there.

I am having a few twinges on and off and feel good in myself who knows if this is a good sign. I am just trying to stay postive and not stress to much. Going out for lunch again today so i can think of something else.

So scared want it so much. ...............................


Take care 

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

thanks kuki and sabah for you support , it is so hard when i have no one in my life you really gets it as they either dont have kids or had them without any hassel. 

Kamie, fx for you   
amf well i have been to the gym this morning and am trying to cut down on the carbs so hopefully i will shift a bit of wieght before  i am pg again!!  Got Dh out tidying up the garden today keeps him busy and out of my way.  
Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend and getting lots of Vitamin D in the sun.
Rachel xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Good morning dear friends,

Trying to cheer up this week. 

Sabah,
How many days to scan?

Kamie,
How many days to OTD?

Rachel,
We understand.. You are going to be fine.. You will see.. Just focus and go for it..

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Kuki  i have a week otd is 5th. Holding off testing as i do not want to get it wrong and test 2 early thinking Thursday on wards for testing. Only got one test kit at home so need DH to get me some more.

Sabah how you doing?

Rachel thinking of you? Lets us know when you decide what you are doing. We are hear for you.

I am feeling good in myself all the signs have lessoned over the last few days so feeling anxious now. Will have to wait and see. Been busy pottering around the house doing all the easy jobs. Ds is playing up at the moment crying if he does not get his own way, he has also started to hit as well. Hope this is a short term development stage, as he is getting difficult to manage.
   this is our time 
Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 


Kamie you dont sound as upbeat but that is understandable as 2ww is hell hope you able to find something fun to distact you and your ds , hope he is more manageble when you are back to "normal" 

love to you all and thanks kuki again for your words of support it is really so important to me. 

Rachel xx


----------



## Nonny3

Hi ladies, do you mind if I join in the chat. 
Have been visiting this fab site for a little while but only just discovered this board and realised that you're all in the same boat as me on here. I've got my ET on Friday and really nervous. Everything has gone really well so far in terms of my body doing what it should on time, but now worrying about my two little frosties thawing ok.  I t
hink I almost feel more nervous than last time which was our first fresh cycle. Probably because I know it's our last go and I want number 2 just as much as I wanted DS. Can any of you relate to that? DH doesn't understand I don't think because he feels we're lucky to have our beautiful boy.
Just called clinic again as was even panicking that I'd written the appointment time down wrong and that they'd thaw my eggs on a different day and we wouldn't be there. Definitely going a bit    ^idiot

Fiona x


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hi Noony lovely to meet you just read your signature wow your little man kept you on your toes for a while. As you will see there has been some good news on here recently lets hope you can continue that, how many are you transfering? We all know exactly where you are coming from with regards to wanting more babies for some bizare reason we feel guilty for even thinking about it. Look forward to chatting.

x


----------



## sabah m

Hi Fiona and welcome!!

   they thaw all nicely for mummy on friday, how exciting!!

I can definately relate to how it feels, although I think I have been far more desperate second time around as I knew what i was missing and wanted for Ds as well as for me. For many reasons we also decided this last cycle (FET) was going to be our last and thank God it was successful     hope to celebrate your good news with you soon too.  

Kamie-you are almost there      here's lots of PMA for the final days, you have been so good to wait    for a celebration this weekend 

Kuki-how are you feeling, hope getting better with reduced dosage. My scan is next tuesday evening. I am tired, nauseas which is reassuring, am sure there's just one baby.

Rachel-any more progress with DH. Do you have a deadline to which you want this to happen?

Hello sleepy


----------



## rachel1972

Hi ladies 

welcome Fiona , can totally relate to your wanting 2nd child. and hubby not bothered.

afm left message for clinic re ssr and spoke to the admin. yesterday and asked her to get dates etc ,it was really odd she just kept saying i need to sort out bloods for dh and consent which he was told be consult. he could do on the day anyway i said i have got to pick up blood results today and will get consent sorted but in the meantime what dates as i need dh to agree and get time off poss  . it was like she didnt believe me or something anyway she hasnt called back so have sent email as i dont have alot of patients today due to lack of sleep again.  been to gp and am having a gtt test to see if i am insulin resistent as i have pco and think it maybe causing my wieght gain etc. Had nice day in the sun at the zoo. What about you lovely ladies how are you all doing and feeling?

Kamie are you being restraint still? re tests

Love and light  Rachel x


----------



## kamie

Fiona welcome,  we all understand how you feel. We are all here for you. I understand the DH things mine is supportive but if he has his way he would be happy with only having ds as he hates the whole TX things, but i know he is only doing it all for me as i think he is scared of what i might happen is he said no.

Sabah scan next week      it all goes well for you. Sounds as though all is going well. 

Kuki hope you are feeling better in your self.

Rachel hope you can get a dates sorted, also you  could speak to consultant about taking metformin through your cycle that is what i was put on this time for Short protocol as i have pcos, however i am a poor responder to drugs and have a low amh but i do believe the metformin helped me, i do not have a problem with my insulin, the metformin stabilises your sugars and it helps balance out hormone levels you needs to start it min 2weeks before cycle starts so it has had time to start working is what my consultant said. Hope this helps in some way.

Yes i have stayed away from testing so want to but scared to do so as i think if it negative i may have some kind of break down. Feel to fragile at the moment i need dh to be home for the day when i do the test so i can start getting on with life what ever the result. I will be testing at the weekend have spoken to dh and he thinks the mood i am in it is better to wait. He has had to work all this week so can not be home more like i had hoped. 

Feeling on and off we have some days i have no signs and other days i have backache and af like pains. Today had a scare as had a lot of af like pain at lunch time that i could not move was scared but it has all gone now and feel fine.
My head feel funny this evening and i am off my food which is weird for me as i love my food but just do not feeling like eatting.

Please please let this work, do not think i could do this again it is to hard..............


----------



## rachel1972

thanks for the advice Kamie i was trying to get info from gp re treatment for pcos if i have it he didnt understand that i was talking in general not fertility as i will have to have icsi anyway really annoying. but will see what bloods say and take it from there.  Good sign that you feel funny.  xx


----------



## Nonny3

Thanks for all the welcomes. Just trying to read back a bit and get to grips with what stage everyone is at.

Sabah - congrats on being pregnant. Hope all goes really smoothly, especially at first scan

Kamie - really hoping that you get a BFP. It's so hard not to test early but I think you're sensible to stay away from the tests. I'm sure appetite changing could be a good sign. 

Rachel - Hope you get the test for DH sorted out. 

Sleepypenguin - Yes, our little one definitely gave us some stress to start with but he's doing so well now and absolutely gorgeous. We're transferring two 5 day blasts this time. They're all we've got and we decided to just go for it and use them both together. We used 2 with DS and just got him obviously so feel we want to do it exactly the same way this time around even though the clinic gave us the whole twin warning thing. 

Kuki - Hope all is going well with your pregnancy. Trying to read back over previous posts but sounds like you have been having a tough time. 

Sorry not to mention anyone else. Will get into to swing with where everyone is at. 

AFM - Got DH to do bath time tonight and warned him that he is going to have to do a whole lot more over the next couple of weeks, even longer hopefully. He's not bad actually. We tend to take it in turns doing bath/bed time. He's a teacher and is home reasonably early. I definitely want to take it easy this weekend after ET but I know they say you should try to be as normal as possible. It's just so different from last time. In some ways it's less stressful as I don't have to worry about taking time off work, but the job I did was desk based and I would just take it easy when I got home. Now I've got a very active little boy to keep my busy 12 hours a day! I guess that's the case with anyone trying for a second whether ivf or natural.


----------



## kdb

Kamie... ++++++++++++++++++    Sounds like your DS may be experiencing the 2-year-old testosterone surge?  My friends who also have sons have warned me about it!  Hitting, playing shooting guns, etc etc.


Sabah - wow!  Congratulations!!  So exciting     


Rachel - I have PCO/PCOS(ish) and was tested for insulin resistance but it came back negative.  Despite that, my clinic put me on Metformin for my first cycle (and through to 12w pregnant) and *if I remember rightly* they said one of the benefits can be improved egg quality.  It can certainly help with weight management if that's the main reason you're looking to take it?


Nonny - I feel exactly the same!  With work you can, at the end of the day, switch it OFF... unlike our little men!


----------



## sabah m

Fiona-     all went well for ET, and you are PUPO now!!


Hello KDB    My DS is almost 3 and definitely got it!  Battlling with DH's testosterone, not good   


Kamie-you are soooo patient!!


----------



## kamie

Hi all

Fiona hope all goes well today.
Kdb boys are sure a handful, but we would not be with out our beautiful angels. 

Sabah are you back at work how are things going?

Well i started spotting yestarday and today it seems a bit more, now not sure what to think. I know it could work even if i bleed as with ds i bleed on and off for the first three months and everything worked. I am just so unsure i need to test but no point now will wait till the morning so it is more accurate. I am 11dpt 3dt so i am sure the test should let me know one way or another. I am not as strong as everyone may think and i do not feel i can put a hold on life any more. I need to stay postive but it feels hard at the moment.

Xx


----------



## KG

Sending hugs, Kamie. Hoping for good news for you.

Kx


----------



## rachel1972

thanks kdb for the info will ask about the metaformin i think.  thats if they ever get back to me i spoke to someone on tue and have not had call back re dates for ssr yet? will call monday

kamie fx for you i am away over the weekend so wont be posting but i really hope it is positive for you xx

hi to everyboday else have a fab weekend.xx


----------



## Nonny3

Kamie - really hope all is well for you.  

Sabah - Thanks for the   for today.

All went really well today so I am now in the PUPO club! 11 days until OTD! Both blasts thawed really well and the embryologist said they were looking really good. I'm feeling really positive right now. Just taking it easy. DH is doing bath and milk. I think DS realises there is something different about Mummy as I've been laying on sofa since we got home. Tummy is one of his newest words so I told him Mummy has something special in her tummy. He looked at me as if to say 'what ever Mummy'!

Hi to everyone else. Hope you're enjoying Friday evening.

N x


----------



## kamie

Good morning ladies 

The pee test says. ......................... 

I still can not belive it........

Clear blue digital says 2-3 weeks which puts us on track for 4 weeks. I am still bleeding small amounts nothing heavy, spoke to clinic yestarday and they have told me to rest and test on monday. I need to ask them about having bloods done as they do not offer it as standard procedure.

Nonny you did it you are PUPO! !! Take it easy and stay positive.  this is your year.

How is every one?

Need to go ds trying to jump on me for computer.

Kamie xx


----------



## kdb

Ooooh... Kamie - hoorayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!


----------



## KG

That's fantastic news,Kamie! 
Kx


----------



## Nonny3

Kamie - Yay Yay Yay!!!   Great news! Take it easy today and enjoy that happy feeling.

AFM - Feeling ok although I really don't know how I am going to make it to OTD. Just seems so far away. Only got through 2 days, 9 to go! I just keep feeling like I must be pregnant because that's what happened last time and am worried that although it's good to feel so positive, it'll be a harder fall if the result is not what we hope for. Absolutely no symptoms yet although I know that I had none with DS until a week or so after test. I had a very very small amount of brown spotting yesterday. Literally the size of a grain of rice and nothing since. Even though our nurse specifically told me to expect spotting this week, I still had a mini panic which sent me and DH into a bit of a downer for an hour or two. But then I talked myself and him up again thinking it could be caused be implantation. So trying to be really positive. DH has been fab, doing loads. Let me have a lie in yesterday and today and he took DS out yesterday morning so I could relax. He's currently cooking us a lovely roast chicken! He also hasn't let me pick little one up at all. I know I'll have to do that tomorrow but it's nice to take it easy for a couple of days. 

Anyway, enough for now. Hope all you ladies are having a lovely relaxing weekend. 

N xxx


----------



## sabah m

OMG Kamie congratulations!!!!!!!       how amazing!!!!! i think it must be twinnies as I got 1-2 weeks at first test   

This is an amazing thread!!

Fiona-stay positive honey, someone told me it will be a hard fall no matter what if it doesn't work, so enjoy the time when you know you could be....really hope its implanted and burrowing deeper and deeper for you   

Hello everyone else....2 more sleeps till scan. I feel ok about it, been also using clearblue weekly and conception gone up to 3+ (not as fast as kamie though  ) and still nauseus. Very very tired too, at a time when DS has decided he doesn't need nap time anymore


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kamie congratulations can't believe how good 2012 is being for all you well deserving ladies.

x


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies thanks so much for all your messages.

I am still in shock...........

Today is otd and the morning pee stick came up with error just my luck so tested on second urine of the day and digital says 1-2 weeks so i am happy with that will call clinic to explain everything and as advised book in for scan in three weeks time. How am i going to get through three weeks. I have no pregnancy sign am going to bed by 9pm but that is it. DH has not said a lot but yestarday he cleaned the house from top to bottom with out being asked (actions speak louader than words).

Sabah you are so funny. ........ Twins. .......... DH is teaching ds to say four against one yestarday to wind me up. What ever we have and how many we have will be what it will be. How are you feeling? What have you been doing about lifting ds. Plan is to take it easy this week and as of Friday I will be taking ds to his group and driving for the first time since EC.

Nonny - hope you had two good days of resting. Do what you can today i have spend time with ds sitting in front of the TV just to make sure i do not over do things. Stay positive even when things get you down, it is hard and we have all been there. Here for you if you want to release the negative energy.       vibes for you. .....

How is every one else doing?

Kamie xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Wonderful news.. So so happy for you..
Jus take it easy and enjoy.
Love. Kukixx


----------



## sabah m

Hey Kamie

You made me feel better with comment about sitting DS infront of tv  !! Been avoiding lifting but have lifted him 3 times in 3 weeks   , once when he fell in the park and was pleading "please carry me" and I could not leave him, I just thought God I will not let my little one suffer in this, protect me!  I still feel nauseaus so feel ok all is well.  

Kuki-so pleased to see your ticker.....its real now!!!!

Love to everyuone else xxx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 

hi Kamie   im so pleased it has made my day , this is getting to be a very lucky thread.  my words cant really do it justice how happy i am for you after all the recent stresses, sounds like your dh has been a good hubby without being asked wow wee.

sabah have a wonderful scan is it tomorrow?

Hi Nonny hope you are staying nice and relaxed.  

afm had a wonderful weekend on my retreat, sadly came back to the usual at home with dh being totally annoying. and ds has been playing up aswell , punishment for leaving him even though he loves being with dh.  clinic finally came back to me re ssr date and said the 8th I was like what April she said no this month i said we needed time to arrange everything and so am waiting for her email with more dates, they seem very disorganised.  

Love and light R xx


----------



## handy1

Hello Ladies

Do you mind if I joined you.

I am soon going to try for number 2 . My DD is 7months now and I am doing it now rather than latter bescause of my age.

I am at work now.

Handy


----------



## Nonny3

Hi Handy - nice to see you here. When are you going to be starting your try for number 2? 

Rachel - Glad you had a lovely weekend and that you got a date for the test. Definitely short notice though! Have you managed to sort another one?

Sabah - So hard doing the not lifting thing isn't it. I'm trying not to lift DS while in 2ww. Nurse said it was fine to lift him from sitting position so get him to come to me, scoop him up to my knee then stand. Really difficult though, especially if they have a fall and are crying. 

Kamie - Has it sunk in yet. 

Everyone else - hope you're all having a good week and have got some sunshine like we have. Makes you feel so much better.

AFM - Trying not to go too crazy. Had a bit of a downy day yesterday after my lovely relaxing weekend. DS is full of cold and a bit moany and seems to be picking up on the fact that Mummy is doing so much less than usual. Asking for cuddles all the time. Feeling more positive today with a week to go. Went to in-laws for lunch which was nice and relaxing. Talking to the embryos every day telling them to keep growing and sticking. 

N x


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

Handy welcome. When do you think you will start tx?

Sabah how did your scan go? Thinking of you

Kuki hope all is well with you and your health is good.

Rachel how are things? Glad you had a good weekend it is nice to get away and relax. Have you been given another start date so excited for you.

Nonny the 2ww is always so difficult, remember you can only do as much as you can. Stay positive.
Things are starting to sink in and i keep telling myself i am pregnant. I am only feeling tired at the moment and like i have a little cold but other wise i am fine. I never had morning sickness with ds so getting a bit worried incase i get it this time.

Kamie xx


----------



## handy1

Thank you Nonny and Kamie for the welcome.

I have started the ball rolling, had my consultation with the lister last week and I need to do a few investigation with my next AF and then the AF after should start the SP of stimming. 

My problem is I should stop breast feeding but I am finding it difficult as Lo wants it at night and becomes upset so i just give her.  I am also thinking I am not yet ready for the heart break and the stress. BUT BUT till when shall i postpone it, and at the same time I think i should start sooner rather trhan latter. 

Sorry ladies me rambling and moaning .... 

I am sure i will be fine, and will come to decision soon.

Handy


----------



## sabah m

Sorry no personals, I'm at work, but just wanted to let you know I had my scan, all looks fine, saw heartbeat!!!  And there mightbe a second one!!!!!! Need to go back in 2 weeks for another scan as consultant was not entirely sure.  DH is denial


----------



## Nonny3

Sabah - so glad scan went well. Meant to ask when I posted yesterday. So exciting to see that heartbeat for the first time. Maybe twins as well! How do you feel about that. Weirdly my DH is positively hoping for twins if it works for us this time!

Handy - Our clinic said I had to have 3 months free of breastfeeding before starting as apparently the prolactin can stay in your body that long after finishing and can mess with the ivf drugs.  So that's something to bare in mind too. I found it really difficult stopping. My DS was just over 11 months and to be honest I would definitely have gone on longer as I absolutely loved breast feeding, ideally to around 14 months. But as I turned 40 just before I gave up, we knew that we had to get on with the attempt for no. 2.


----------



## Kuki2010

Sabah,
Delighted with your news.. I always wanted to have twins.. Hope you have them..    

Love to you all.

Kukixx


----------



## rachel1972

Sabah glad the scan was ok, i dont think i would cope well with the not knowing if it were twins though.

Hi handy1 and welcome.  

hi to kuki, kamie, nonny and all the rest who maybe reading

afm looks like ssr will be on the 23rd if all the paperwork and bloods are ok the clinic have been so disorganised and dh still being a pain in the a£££, but just have to plough on.  He was possibly going to be working away for part of the week but it hasnt happened yet and i would be very happy if it had TBH. He so grumpy and such a pesimistic person.

love and light to all


----------



## KG

Ooh, Sabah, how exciting. So pleased for you and that there has been happy news on this thread recently. 

Kuki, how are you doing? Do you have a nice bump developing?

Kamie, hope all is well with you too. I didn't have morning sickness either time!

Good luck to everyone just starting for no2 and having tx right now - having two is an amazing new step on the journey. 

Kx


----------



## kamie

Sabah what great news. Hope the next two weeks are not to difficult.

Rachel not to long till tx starts. Hope all works out and dh and he starts playing ball.

Handy hope you are able to sort things out so you can start tx when you are ready.

Hi to everyone else.

Life is just ticking along here tomorrow i am on nursery pick up so hope i can get ds in the car seat with some sort of ease. I have a little step and ds is able to climb into the car and stand on the step so i am hoping all i have to do is lift hime alittle bit. On friday i am also taking ds to his group in the morning so need to make sure ds does not keep sitting on my lap with a thump as he does some time.

Kamie xx


----------



## kdb

Sabah - how exciting!! And maybe even more wonderful news to come for you and your DH   


KG - what a beautiful profile pic!


Handy - like Nonny, I'd been told to stop b/f at least three months before cycling.  Good luck!


----------



## kamie

HI ladies 

How is everyone?

Rachel are you looking at starting tx soon?

Nonny how are things with you? thinking of you.

Sabah how are you feeling have you had another scan yet?

Kuki how are you feeling? hope things have got better for you.

I have meaning to come on for a few days now but for some reason my tablet is not working so had to wait until i had time to sit at the computer. I am okay have not had any pregnancy symptoms yet, but i am only around 5 and half weeks. I did another digital test on sunday and it still said 2-3 weeks so was a bit worried as i would i expected it to say 3+ weeks any way did not have time to think about it to much as DH took me out for the day. on Monday I had small amount of spotting so I ran the clinic and they asked me to come in for a blood test which i did yestarday and HCG came back as 1310 which she said was good but to make sure it is increasing i am back in tomorrow to have another blood test. I have my scan booked for 28th march so i still have another 2 weeks until i now for sure. 

 our little one stays with us.

please please let us see a heart beat

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi Kamie dont really know about the HCG levels but really hope it is in the normal range and cant wait to hear all about the scan.

My dh has is SSR on 23rd so will know if there is sperm still and when we will be cycling I would hope April or May.

Hi to everyone else, how are you?

Rachel xx


----------



## KG

Kamie, I've never had HCG done, but I wouldn't put too much on what those digital tests say - I've read so many stories on here of ladies worrying when they don't change, that I think they must be v unreliable. Hang on in there, it's worse than the 2ww.

Kx


----------



## kdb

Kamie


----------



## sabah m

Hi Everyone 

All well here, got GP appointment later to decide which hospital I will go to etc. Decided against second scan as have to pay for it, will wait for 12 week one unless GP refers me later. Kamie-my digital tests also showed slow increasing conception indicator which if there are twins proves they are unreliable, so I would not worry. Can you believe you are pregnant?

I am nauseous most when I first go into fresh air!! Other than that very tired but think I may be eating too much which is causing lethargy.....having been on weight watchers for so long I think my body is unable to manage my partying  

I have been lifting DS since the weekend, he fell and hurt himself quite badly and I had to carry him back to the car. I was so upset, DH spoke with GP who said its fine, am out of dangerous zone, so while I am avoiding it I am lifting him if necessary! have started the potty training again today, 3 accidents, 3 showers and not a drop of wee in a potty or toilet 

Rachel I am so excited about your progress,     SSR is successful honey. How is it with DH anyway?

Kuki how is it going?

KG and Sleepy-hugs and kisses to you and your LOs.

KDB & Nonny-how do you feel about waiting till BF done?

Handy-hope you are ok xxxx


----------



## KG

Sabah, good luck with the potty training - don't worry, he will get the hang of it soon!

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Aaaaah is that baby Amos, adorable!!!


----------



## rachel1972

Hi Sabah he hasnt gone!! but has been behaving himself a bit better.  How old is your boy?  good luck with potting trainning Ethan didnt manage it till he was nearly 4.  So do you know if its twins yet?  did i miss something? sorry.

hi everyone else hope you are having good day in the sun!!


----------



## KG

Sabah, yes, that's my boy! He's such a calm, easy baby, I can't believe my luck - ds1 was very unsettled when he was small.

Kx


----------



## sabah m

Hi rachel

DS will be 3 in 2 months, his nursery want him trained before putting him into the next class at aged 3. I decided to start yesterday as took day off so can continue today and all weekend, nursery will do it during the week. He has been a star and despite numerous accidents has weed in potty twice    Idiot DH did not put pants on him after an accident this morning and lo and behold there followed a trail of poo pellets along living room carpet on the day I have sickness as well as nausea!!!!!!!

Hope things with your DH stay good and he has a very successful op xxx


----------



## rachel1972

Oh sabah sounds like hard work , hope dh cleaned it up? xx


----------



## handy1

HELLO

Sabah ...what a hard work, your DS surely will get trained quickly.

Rachel .. hope your DH SSR went ok

KG... your son is gorgeous.

Kamie ... Hope everything is going ok and your HCG levels seem to be ok. Hope now that they increased. Don't worry about those POS some of them are not really accurate.

AFM... I am still breastfeeding at night and it is so difficult to just wean my DD suddenly. I will try to reduce it gradually till she is comfortable with it.  I am also feeling stressed and having flash back of how the treatment was emotionally hard till I got BFPwith my DD. 
Sometimes I feel I can't go through this again and other times i convince myself it will be easier this time as whatever the result , it was not going to be a disaster.

Anyway, I am taking my time to wean the Lo and think anout it carefully.

Love to you all

Handy


----------



## rachel1972

Hi handy I wouldnt stress about tx just yet your dd is still so little and a few months isnt going to make alot of difference , enjoy it xxx

dh ssr next friday.


----------



## Nonny3

Hello lovely ladies
Sorry, it's been a few days(make that over a week!) since I've had chance to get anywhere near the computer! I've been wanting to find time since Tuesday which was OTD.... 

We got a BFP  

Can't believe it's taken me four days to find the time to tell you all! I think I was kind of in shock for a couple, even though I 'felt pregnant' for a week before the test. Just had that feeling. Felt totally exhausted and just different somehow. Got our scan a week on Thursday so will be feeling a little nervous until then but exhaustion continues, the boobs are feeling firmer and I got my first feelings of sickiness this morning so all good signs I guess. Oh, and the test itself was really strong, compared to DS which was a really faint line. 

So now I've got to catch up on all of you - 

Kamie - Really hope everything goes well. I've never had HGC test. Our clinic don't do it. Just home test then scan at 6 weeks. I'm sure your levels have now increased and perhaps don't do any more tests. I think if you do that first test and it's positive then believe and don't test again. I've never done more than just the initial test. But that's just me. Anyway, I'm sure everything will be fine for you. 

Sabah - Hope your GP appointment went well. I've been wondering how soon to go see mine as last time I waited until we were discharged from clinic at 9 weeks and I felt I was rather late into the system. May go sooner this time as we won't be discharged until 10 weeks . Hope the potty training is progressing well. I'm tempted to try this summer even though DS will be under 2 as I really don't fancy doing 2 lots of nappies at same time, or potty training him while we've got a small baby. He already tells us when he's doing a poo most times so obviously has some understanding. Worth a go. 

Rachel - Hope the SSR goes well. My hubbie had to go through that too. 

Hi to KG,KDB,Handy,Kukie and anyone else reading. Hope everyone is fine and well and enjoying Saturday morning. 

Nonny x


----------



## rachel1972

Congratulations Nonny fantastic news this really is the luckiest group, xx  dont be a stranger want to know all about the scan etc.


----------



## sabah m

Nonny!!!!!!!!          CONGRATULATIONS!!!! This is a very very lucky thread indeed, come on 2012 babies!!!!!


Potty training is so much easier this time (4th attempt) as he's obviously ready.  NO ACCIDENTS TODAY!!! A poo in the potty too which I have been told is very impressive already!! He was different this time as was telling us when he'd weed or pood himself whereas previously he has not batted an eyelid and kept on playing   Nonny-wait till you feel ready, I stressed about lifting him in shower to wash accidents etc so not worth the extra stress at this precious time.  And if they are not ready, they are not ready!!!


So pleased for my fellow pregnant ladies, Rachel really hope we will be celebrating your news soon xxxxxxxxx


----------



## RJS

Wow! What's happened on this thread since I last visited?! 

Sabah / Nonny - big congrats! Fab, lovely news!

Everyone else - hello! Sorry for lack of personals.... DD watching Cbeebies and am not gonna get away with it for long!

Am bit stressed with too much on at the moment. Work is ridiculous & it's not helping spending every weekend at a kid's parties being asked about having another child!

Anyway, onwards & upwards... I went running outside this week for first time in 18 months. After all my back probs & the op I honestly didn't know if this would be an option so v pleased as I love it! Also DD been great... Albeit that on my working 4 days I hardly see her. But making most of time we do have. 

AF arrived just now so I'll have to go to the clinic on Mon & all being well will start the short protocol then! Only slight worry is DD's 4th b'day on the 29th, party at mine on the 31st... Really hope I can avoid EC on those dates! 

Off out to friend's without kids for dinner so no "baby no 2" talk... Hooray! Gonna enjoy my last drop of alcohol for a while too! 

Nearly two years since I did this last so please can anyone remind me.... Pineapple juice / choc protein shakes/ milk whilst stimming? I have low ovarian reserve so eggs need all the help they can get. I remember having a wheatie on my tummy whilst stimming as well.... Does this all sound about right?! 

Thanks ladies. Xx


----------



## KG

Nonny, congratulations, brilliant news!
Kx


----------



## kdb

Nonny!!!!!!!!!!!  Brilliant, fantastic, wonderful, most excellent news!!  Huge congratulations     

Sabah... LOL LOL at the poo pellets!

RJS - DHEA may help?  Our clinic recommends 75mg per day.  You can buy online - I believe the ionised / ionized stuff from the US is best.  Definitely a yes for the protein shakes.  Good luck!


----------



## rachel1972

Good morning ladies , the sun is shinning i feel so good, 3 more days till ssr.


----------



## kamie

Nonny - congrats hope you are feeling okay. So happy for you all, yeah. .................

Rachel hope it all goes well. 

Rjs have you started tx thinking of you.

Sabah how is the potty training going? 

Sorry if i have forgotten any one.

Well plan was to get on ff today and tell you all HCG levels did go up last week so waiting now for scan. Not sure but may try to book a private scan tomorrow with a local hospital as had a nightmare day today and scrae it has effected the baby. This morning some young guy rang the door bell and i went to the window and thought do not know him so will not answer i thought he had seen me. Once he went i went upstair and looked out of the window to see three guy looking at me from the street so again i thought i had been seen with in to minutes two guys at the front door booting it in trying to get in the house i locked myself in the study on the phone to the police screaming telling them i was pregnant and some one was breaking in. I think i scraed them off by screaming and the tv being on down stairs. I live on a busy in side road we have a primary school a minute from our house and our road is a cut through. So glad ds was a nursery and did not witness any of it. So lucky they did not get into the house. We think they wanted the car. My husband has a nice car that he has worked hard for, luckley it is going in the next few weeks as we are ment to be getting a new car he wanted to by another nice car brand new but i told him today i want something old but nice. What is the world coming too.....

Sorry for my rant do not think police took me seriously as i am only 6 weeks pregnant.

Hoping baby is still okay...... Please god let today not have harmed our baby in any way.

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

omg Kamie thats awful, hope you are ok and everything ok tomorrow. xx


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kamie What a nightmare really hope you are feeling better and have Hubby home with you. I take it the little scroats got away, what goes around comes around.

xXx


----------



## RJS

Hi Kamie,

What a total nightmare. So glad you are all safe. I can only imagine how horrible it must've been... But please know that your precious cargo is safe & sound. Hope you are looking after yourself... Bath, tv, etc.

I am fine. Started short protocol yest! EC might be 29th (DD's b'day) or poss 31st (her party!) Trying not to worry about that just yet.

DH & I not getting on. He's got a sleep problem & is falling asleep even whilst we are talking. Is snoring next to me in bed now. The first part of day we could talk & he can't stay awake. I have cried myself to sleep last 3 night's & tonight told him to "F... Off!" I feel alone & although I realise it's not his fault it makes me feel as if we're not a team. So annoyed with him right now! 

Hope everyone else is well.

Xxx


----------



## rachel1972

RJS  sorry you are feeling so bad, hope EC is ok , try and stay positive.xx


----------



## Jujube

Hi ladies
Mind if I join you all?  

We have a little boy, who is almost 7 months old and has brought more to our lives than we ever thought possible!  I'm 37 and anxious to get start on #2, as my mother's menopause hit at 39.....  We saw a new doctor (for us) at the Lister this morning and she's recommended we start with the two frozen embryos we've got and take it from there.  Not sure when we will start to be honest..... Need to get my head around all of this.  Anyway, I hope chatting to you all will help get me there!

Chat soon
Jujube

PS - Hi again KDB!


----------



## kdb

JUJUBE!!!!!!!!!  Yay sweetie!!!  So lovely to see you here   We are also hoping  to use our frosties, maybe July-ish.  Will you go back to Dr G too, or do immunes via Lister?

Kamie... OMG!  You poor soul!  God, I can't imagine how terrified you must've felt.  Hope the police turned up?

RJS - sorry to hear things aren't going well with DH


----------



## Jujube

Hey KDB
Well, we're trying to keep the expense down this time around as the last cycle was soooo expensive with all the Dr G retests etc.  Lister yesterday said they don't see the need for ILs after 12 weeeks.... to be fair, my retests post 12 weeks were all clear so I'm debating it at the moment.  If I do decide to do ILs to 30 weeks, I will get them done locally and not do any retests.....  Are you back from NZ btw?

Kamie - your story sent shivers down my spine.... hope you're ok.

J


----------



## sabah m

Jujube-welcome!!! Hope all goes well with your FET so you don't need anything else, my FET worked this time!!

Kamie    so so horrified at your experience, have you had scan yet, I am sure all is well with baby xxx

rachel, one more sleep,     all goes successfully tomorrow xxx


----------



## rachel1972

Welcome jujube.

Kamie how are you?  

hello to everyone else hope you are enjoying the sunshine.

Love and light to you all xx


----------



## RJS

Hello All,


Kamie - how are you doing? xx


Welcome jujube... You will get lots of support here. xx


Kdb- ta for your kind thoughts.     


Rachel - hope all well.


Things improved with DH thankfully, although as I type he's sparko on sofa! Work has been stressy but a good distraction... Been doing lots for Sports Relief (am a teacher,) & ran a mile today which was fun. Such gorgeous weather. Now watching it on tv with a cheeky G & T. 


Jabs (3xa day,) v painful (DH doing them.) 


Clinic on Monday. 


Happy weekend all. xx


----------



## rachel1972

hi ladies 

rjs really glad things are improving for you 

afm ssr all done , sperm on ice awaiting my eggs now.  

Love and light to all xx


----------



## sabah m

Brilliant news Rachel, when are dates planned for your tx?


RJS-well done on the run, sorry things hard at home xxx


----------



## rachel1972

hi sabah I dont know yet i have to sort out my sons school place as he has SEN and now has a statement so i now have to consider more options for his school choice after already do the choice it was all a waste of time in a way. So tx will have to be next on the list.  For now. How are you doing.

Kamie hope you are ok?

xx


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies 

thanks for all your messages. i am okay, still shacken up and on edge and trying to get on with life. I went to see the g.p last week and she has referred me to the hospital already for my midwife appointment and scan. Also gp told me not to worry about baby as if i have not fallen over or hurt myself in any way things should be fine. i am now 7 weeks and have my scan on wed pm can not wait just praying to see a heart beat. i am feeling well in myself have had no symptoms just some headaches which could be down to shock and tiredness.

my computer is still playing up and i have not had time to do anything about it as i am trying not to spend so much time in the house due to the fact the insurance company are taking ages to come and change the front door. i have a victim support appointment on wed morning as i have told them i need some emotional support.

We are waiting to find out the outcome of the scan on wednesday and then moving full steam ahead with our new plans. we decided last week enough is enough this is our fouth break in in the late 8 years so we are moving i think it look like some where in essex will be our new home, as of the weekend i have started to research school as ds starts sept 2013 so if possible we need to have moved by christmas so i can get all the paper worker done in time. as you can all tell nothing runs smoothly in our house not only pregnant but also moving house this is going to be another tought year, at least their is light at the end of the tunnel we can have a new start with the family we have always wanted.

Rachel great news, hope you do not have to wait to long for tx to start and good luck with ds SEN sound as though things are moving forward for you.

Sabah- how is the toilet training going we plan to start in may once i am 12 weeks.

Jujube - welcome 

RJS how are you doing? when is transfer date?

sleeping penguin and kds hope things are well with you.

I will up date once i have had the scan on wednesday.

enjoy the sun 

Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi All

Kamie glad you are ok i thought your scan was last week was getting a bit worried.

afm tx will have to wait for now as when i got back from clinic the statement of educ. needs was here and now i am re evaluating the whole shool choice , such an important thing dont want to be worring about tx on top of that for now. relieved that ssr is done, dh been in alot of discomfort and being is usual self, dont know how much more i can take at the mo.


----------



## rachel1972

sorry i have just posted the same as before.  stresssed out


----------



## kamie

Rachel - just take your time. Ds has to come first and the sen and schooling is so important it is a big job and does need your full concentration.
i have not been able to concentrate on the pregnancey since last week and now ds has become clingy and have been lifting him all the time, but i have to make sure every one is okay. 

once you have sorted the school stuff out can you get out for a day and have some quality time away from every thing so you can re- focus.

just had a phone call to say next wednesday for front door to get changed arguing with everyone saying it is not exceptable but they keep saying nothing can be done it's fine for all of them they do not have to spend all day looking at a boarded up front door.

i think i am so on edge once i have the scan on wed and i am told they have found a heart beat i will just cry my eyes out.

kamie xx


----------



## Nonny3

Hi Ladies

Kamie - So sorry to read about your frightening experience. So horrible for you. Good luck with all the move. Really hope your scan goes well on Wednesday. I have mine on Thursday. 

Rachel - Glad the SSR went well. I think you're probably sensible to wait to tx. Best to be able to focus your full attention on it. 

RJS - Sorry things are tricky with your DH. Well done on doing the run though. I'm afraid I made no contribution to Sport relief myself!

Jujube - Welcome and hope all goes well with your frozen cycle. It's really great chatting to everyone on here when you're going through it. 

Sabah, Kdb, SleepyPenguin and anyone else I've missed - hope you're all well. 

AFM- Been having a nightmare few days as I have had some bleeding. A small spot on Wednesday night mixed with cyclogest fallout but wasn't too worried as it was a spot and pale pink followed by nothing. But then on Saturday morning woke and went to loo(sorry tmi) and had more. This then lasted until yesterday evening. Every time a went to loo there would be a bit as well as small amount inbetween. Just brown and hard to say how much because taking 3 cyclogest a day means there isn't much time when small amounts of that aren't coming down and mixing with it. I had no pain though which was reassuring. Also still had the pregnancy symptoms I've been feeling since ET, ie, morning sickness, debilitating tiredness and slightly sore boobs.
Finally got to speak to my clinic now and they have reassured me, especially as I haven't had a loss since last night. They said it could be a number of things. Drugs could be causing cervix to be irritated and that could be losing blood, could be virginal bloodloss caused by pessaries or as I had two embryos could be that both had implanted but am now losing one of them! Really can't say until my scan which I'm having on Thursday. She could have offered me on tomorrow but she said waiting until Thurs means I'll be 6+2 so more likely that they'll be able to see what is going on. As blood loss has now stopped I'm happy enough to wait until then but do want Thursday to come quick. I am trying to think really positive. We did have this with DS and obviously everything was ok but it was at 11+3 and we'd already had 2 scans so just felt a bit more solid. The fact that we haven't seen this little one yet just makes it harder to visualise it's there. Just     that we see that little heartbeat on Thursday. 

Sorry for the long post. Just need to get it all off my chest. Been such a crappy weekend. 

Nonny


----------



## rachel1972

nonny sending you a massive hug xx


----------



## kdb

Nonny...


----------



## Jujube

Nonny - very best of luck for the scan tomorrow.  Fingers crossed for you.


----------



## kamie

hi ladies 

this is sort and sweet had scan everything is present but no heart beat. Sonographer explained i have done nothing wrong and it looks as though things have stopped in the last few days.

We have been referred to our local EPU and have been booked in for another scan next week Wednesday after which we will know for sure what the situation is. But from speaking to the Dr and nurse at clinic everyone made it sound like it was over.

Not sure but hoping for some kind of miracle by next week

  

Kamie


----------



## kdb

Oh Kamie    We will all be hoping and praying for better news next Weds xoxoxoxo


----------



## sleepypenguin

Kamie   I really hope you get some better news next week.

x


----------



## Jujube

I'm so sorry Kamie....


----------



## Nonny3

Oh Kamie I'm so sorry to hear your news.     
Hoping that you get good news next week.
x


----------



## rachel1972

Kamie i am really sorry


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
Haning in there.. It can change.. Stay     
Love. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies 

Thanks for all your messages. 

Still     and will continue to until i know for sure. I will keep fight with the little strenghth i have left. 

enjoy the sun and have a great weekend.

Kamie xx


----------



## RJS

Hi Ladies,


Kamie   will    For you that all is well. So many on here have seen things change. Know that whatever happens it is out of your hands.


Nonny - how are u? Xx    


Been a roller coaster week here with work, DD's 4th birthday, IVF looking like it might be cancelled, but today all ok & EC with my 4 follicules is on mon. DD's party here with 13 kids tomoz! 


Take care all...we need some luck on here.   Xxx


----------



## Nonny3

Morning everyone
I thought it was about time I shared what is going on with me. I didn't feel I could on Thursday after reading Kamie's post.
We had the scan Thursday morning and rather than my dreaded senario of finding nothing there, she said we had two pregancy sacs! Oh the relief. However, they could only find a heartbeat on one of them, and the one without was in a very much smaller sac than the one with. So to a certain extent I know how you're feeling Kamie, although I know I am truely blessed that I have one with a heartbeat. You probably think it's not the same for me at all. But it doesn't stop me hoping and praying that the other one will by Thursday when we go for another scan. DH and everyone else almost seems to have dismissed the second one as if it's just the same situation as with DS, that just one had taken. But for me it's not like that at all. With DS the 2nd blastocyst just didn't work and we never saw it at the scan. But this time they both worked, they both implanted and they both started growing. I know that at this moment in time I have two embryos inside me. I know that I am so so lucky to have one that has a heartbeat and is doing well but I will be very sad if the other one doesn't make it. 
Just hoping for a good scan this week and sending so many positive thoughts to Kamie for hers too. 

Hope you all have a lovely weekend.

Nonny x


----------



## sabah m

kamie honey      really praying it was too early to see heartbeat and its there waiting healthy for you.....why can't it be simple after BFP?  I am so sorry you are having to go through this stressful time.


Nonny-praying for you too, its hard to just let go no matter how blessed you know you are!  Our next scan is in 3 weeks, NHS one to see if second sac grew.  


Love to everyone else xxx


----------



## kamie

RJS hope today has gone well. thinking of you. How did dd's party go hope all went to plan and she had a lovley birthday.

Nonny thinking of you hope all goes well on thursday.   for a second heart beat.

rachel how is all the school stuff going?

hope every one else is well?

i am okay have moments of sadness and moments of hope that all will be okay. we have done a lot of talking over the weekend and have planned our next steps what every the out come on wednesday. Feeling as though life has to go no and not sure if i have had enough of wanting a second child. everyone around me is telling me i should be happy with one and i do not know why i can not be. 

kamie xx


----------



## RJS

Hi All,


Kamie    It's easy for others to say that. We all know how completely blessed we are but we shouldn't feel guilty for wanting another child. Xx Ty not to rush into any big decisions.    Thinking of you. Xx


Nonny -    For next scan. Thinking of you. Xx


I had EC today - got 3 eggs so    For some fertilisation action overnight! 


DD's birthday party was fabulous - she loved every second & it was a real success. Feel so truly blessed with my gorgeous girl. 


Will let you know how tmrw goes - in the meantime can anyone please remind me of 2ww eating / drinking tips?


Xx


----------



## sabah m

RJs-so pleased your cycle went ahead and eggies fertilised, little fighters!!! I'm sure its all nonsense but I bought and cored a pineapple and ate the core    as read that it helps with implantation!!!  I didn't add anything else significant, just continued with pregnacare.  


It will be DS 3rd bday soon, they are so precious, thats why we want more!!!!!


----------



## RJS

Hi All,


Clinic called this morning to say none of the 3 eggs had fertilised.    1 has but with 3 sperm so it's abnormal. 2 with no fertilisation signs. Embryolgist is going to check again tmrw for slim chance they may be slow... But it looks like it's game over.


So sad.      For a miracle overnight. My eggs are the problem. 

Xx


----------



## handy1

RJS ... I am so sorry... Keep on hanging there ... and I hope the slim chance the embryologist said will happen to you. 
Lots of hugs ... lots of hugs

Kamie ... hope you are ok 

Nonny ... Hope they find that 2nd heart beat on your next scan

AFM ... I had my investigation today... Unfortunately , it does look good my FSH is 33, E2 is less than 70 . any way with such FSH level no clinic will treat mee.... so sad

Handy


----------



## RJS

Morning,

Clinic called and defo no fertilisation taken place. Have follow up tomorrow at 11.

We are going to research using donor eggs.

So so sad...DD is getting me through but she keeps saying she's lonely.   

Handy -   So sorry to read your results. Life eh?

xx


----------



## Nonny3

RJS - So sorry to hear your news.    Give yourself some time to decide what to do next. I would definitely recomend thinking about the donor eggs. We have used donor sperm for our IVF and we have been very lucky. Took DH quite a while to decide we could do it but it was worth it in the end and DS is no less his son. Not an easy decision though. 

Handy - Sorry to hear about your FSH.  

Kamie - Thinking of you today. Hope you have had good news.  

Hi to everyone else.
AFM - Feeling glad we agreed to a scan tomorrow rather than waiting the two weeks for the next scheduled scan. Just want to know what is going on with the second embryo so I can move on and concentrate on the healthy one. Number 1 is clearly doing well though as I have the most awful morning sickness(far worse than with DS) since last week. Lasts most of the day! Shouldn't complain though.

Nonny x


----------



## Kuki2010

RJS,
I am so very sorry.    
Kukixx


----------



## Jujube

So sorry RJS....

A lot of people seem to using Serum in Greece for donor eggs if that's any help?


----------



## kdb

RJS... truely sorry to hear your news


----------



## sabah m

RJS So so very sorry about what has happened, life is so unfair and my heart aches for you DD asking for siblings, its what I dreaded the most.  Its great there's an alternative for you, but I am so sorry you had to go through this disappointment    


kamie-praying for a miracle hun      


Nonny-excited to hear your news, sickness good sign!!


handy-so sorry to hear about your news too, I don't know what the figures mean but i hope you are ok......why do we have the desire for more when its so hard?? What else is available?


Kuki-how are you, really hope things are getting better healthwise


rachel-how is it going?


jujube-hi!!


AFM been off work all week, severely tired, nausea and sickness suddenly really bad, nausea fairly constant unless my tummy over full with food which means I am putting weight on which I am worried about.  Seeing midwife Saturday so will see if all is as should be. xxx


----------



## Nonny3

Hello everyone
Well, we went to the clinic today and it seems miracles can happen. We're definitely expecting twins!!!
She looked at the big one first and it had exactly doubled in size from 4mm to 8mm which she said was perfect for 7 weeks(I'm 7+2). She then went to the other one and unbelievably there was a very definite strong fast heartbeat. Also, when she measured it it had gone from 1.9mm last week to 5mm this week. So it is still small but had more than doubled. Doubling in a week is the norm apparently at this stage. We're excited but realistic. As far as we're concerned we definitely having twins but we know that it is early days and we just have to take things day by day, week by week and just hope no. 2 continues to grow well and catch up with no.1.
It really explains how I'm feeling. Like youo Sabah, the nausea is really bad, nearly continuous and the very thought of a lot of types of food makes me feel terrible. DH is having to do all the cooking  as I just can't face it and I seem to be living on digestive biscuits and crackers. Also loving plain boiled rice. Can't bear pasta any more!

Anyway, enough of my sicky symptoms. Hope everyone else is ok. Kamie, really thinking of you. So    that you have had the same miracle as us.  
Nonny


----------



## RJS

Hello,

Nonny -     What lovely great news. 
Here's hoping for a happy and healthy pregnancy for you all now.    Thanks also for your thoughts re using a donor. The only slight worry I have is that DD looks so much like me. I was adopted as a baby and had no idea how much I would love having a girl who looks just like me. 

Sabah - Thanks for your kind thoughts. Hope the morning sickness eases.

Kuki - How are you? Hope you are feeling a bit better. 

Kdb - Thanks for your thoughts. xx

Jujube - Ta for the advice. Will check it out.

Went to follow up appointment. As expected consultant told me he wouldn't advise another cycle as it looks as though my eggs are no good. We talked about egg donors - they have a really long waiting list so will go abroad. I was OK at the clinic until it came to saying goodbye....we have been using that clinic since Jan 2007 and I said thank you to them for helping me have my gorgeous girl (who was with me.) I actually felt really sad to be saying goodbye to them all....the end of the road (and not in the way we would've wanted   .)

However, spent the afternoon in Brighton with a friend who is single and had the menopause at 24 who has gorgeous 4 year old twins concieved via IVF using donor egg and sperm. They are an inspiration to me and DH. First time I have talked it over with anyone also.

Thanks as always for all your support on this board. xx


----------



## kamie

Morning ladies 

Thanks for all your messages.

Nonny - fantastic news, make sure you take care of your self.

Sabah- hope you feel better soon , and scan goes well in a few weeks.

Kuki - how are you?

RJS- so sorry about your news   . you must be so upset. Take your time and do talk to people about DE route. We have had discussions about it since we started trying for a second child, but we decided we would try with my egg first. if you are thinking of abroad my dr told me most people go to spain, portugal and greece as the law is different abroad about ED, sorry have no names of clinics for you but if i hear of any will pm you. Once i have get around to booking a review we may be joining you down this route.

Handy-   sorry to hear that the investigations have not worked out. Thinking of you.

Well the scan this week showed no heart beat but she could not see a fetal pole either which is weird as i had one last weeks. As i was coming to the end of 8 weeks and had the previous scan at 7.5 weeks the DR 's decided it would not be right to make me wait another week on the drugs as i was have no symptoms. I came off the drugs wed night and actually the few symptoms i was getting have gone.    

We went through our options and decided if i went down the medicated tablet route i would be in hospital over easter and surgical route scares me incase things go wrong and i could have no more tx. so we have gone for the natural route which will take time but hopefully be less stress on my body. I have another appointment at hospital next week tuesday when i start antibiotics and  have my first accupunture appointment booked on wed with a specialist in fertility who feels she could help me manage my mischarage naturally. Not sure if i am making the right decision and if it get to much i can ring the hospital any time and book in for surgical route.

Once this is over i will be looking at how life needs to move forward in our house.

thanks


----------



## KG

Kamie, I am so, so sorry. I had a v similar experience on my first tx ttc no2. I can imagine the horrible week you have had. I opted for the surgical route as Dh was going away for work and I didn't want to be on my own with ds when it happened naturally, although in some ways I would have preferred to let things happen on their own. I am sending you a huge hug.

RJS, I am sorry to hear your news too. Good that you have a future plan, though.

Kx


----------



## Nonny3

Kamie - So so sorry to hear your news. Sending you   . I was so hoping the outcome would be different for you. Take care of yourself and do whatever feels right. I had the surgical procedure about 15 years ago and it really was fine. I just couldn't cope with the thought of it happening naturally. Actually thinking about it they didn't even give me the choice. But do what's best for you. Thinking of you. 

RJS - Really pleased that you are making plans and so good that you have a friend who has donor experience who you can talk to and be inspired by. Such a shame that your clinic has a waiting list. We were lucky to get donor sperm straight away at our clinic but I'm guessing there are more male than female donors as it's so much easier! Hope you manage to find a good clinic abroad if you decide to go down that route. 

Hope everyone else is having a good Good Friday.

N x


----------



## Jujube

So sorry Kamie....  I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you at the moment....


----------



## kdb

Oh Kamie, honeybee   You must be heartbroken    Hope you can start to heal soon xoxo


----------



## Kuki2010

Kamie,
I hope you are coping? Thinking of you.. Kukixx


----------



## kamie

Thanks for all your messages.

I am taking each day as it come at the moment, once everything is over and i get the all clear i am booking us a holiday some where all inclusive. We have decided that we will have our review until this is over and we have had time to talk.

I will be checking in on here from time to time to see how things are going but need to focus on other things for a while even if that means not having a family of four.

love Kamie xx


----------



## rachel1972

Hi Kamie take care have a wonderful time away , we are here when you want to share.love R xx


----------



## Nonny3

Kamie, take care of yourself and have a lovely holiday. You deserve it. 
Nonny x


----------



## Nonny3

Hi Everyone. Hope everyone is well. Seems to have gone a little quiet around here. Missing you all.

Had a bit of a set-back this week. Went for a scan on Thurs and found we have lost one of our twins. . We lived the dream for a week but sadly the little one that didn't have a heartbeat at the first scan didn't make it. So sad but trying really hard to move forward and be positive for the little one inside me who is doing really well. It's not easy though. DH is being very manly and positive about everything although he did cry when we left the clinic. I'm finding it a little harder. In M+S this morning and saw twins and had a bit of a wobble. I know that we are SO SO lucky that I am pregnant and have one little one inside but it's still sad to think of what could have been.

Hope you all are fine and having a good weekend.

N x


----------



## sabah m

hello ladies, very quiet on here....

kamie hun-how are you doing?   Hope you have managed to organise a fabulous holiday.

Nonny-   how are things progressing? I am so sorry for your disappointment. We had our scan finally yesterday, it showed one healthy baby....boy. Very very happy but was surprised how disappointed DH was. He had got used to idea of two....I was very disappointed when got pregnant with DS originally that there weren't two but I guess just very grateful he survived.

rachel-how are you? And DS's school? Did you get the choice you wanted?

RJS how are you hun? Have you thought more about next steps?

Handy-how are you doing?

Jujube-hope all is well with you too 

Kuki-my old buddy-have read your diary and really praying all will be well despite the way you are feeling through this pregnancy.  How are you?  Congratulations on getting Lara's school choice.

AFM-very happy all is well, had some very rough weeks where I felt very very low hence no posts....I think I was depressed but on the up now.


----------



## Kuki2010

Dear Sabah,
So happy and congrats on your baby boy. Lovely.. They will be close two boys together..
Glad you are feeling lighter in these days.. Not easy.. 
I am trying to take one day at the time. My mum is over from Istanbul. She is constantly doing cleaning.. going nuts in the flat but lets see I am hoping she will settle..
My tummy is painful but coping.. Another check up on friday. See how it goes..
Stay safe and take good care.. 
I don't write that often inhere but thining of you.. 
Love to you all.
Kukixx


----------



## RJS

Hi Girls,


Hope you are all well.


V quick post just to say I am planning to go to Cyprus prob next month to use donor eggs... Trying to organise it at the mo. Surrounded by people popping out babies so DD is always on about having a sibling...  


Hope all you pg ladies are being kind to yourself.


Soz for no personals... Off to a friends in our new car 2.5 hrs drive just me and DD so gotta get organised! Xxx


----------



## Kuki2010

RJS,
Great plan.. Just go for it!!!

Hope all the ladies in here doing okay.. So quiet in here.. How are you all

Love to you all. Kukixx


----------



## traceytbird80

Hi ladies

Got a BFP cant believe it so so pleased still early days so trying to keep my feet on the ground 

good luck to all of you 

tbird x


----------



## Monkeymoo

WOW Congratulstions


----------



## Monkeymoo

I mean congratulations lol


----------



## rachel1972

congrats to traceybird 

hi to everyone whats happening out there?

ive booked follow up and nurse tx plan app on 29th of june trying to decide if to do mild ivf or natural ivf with icsi ??


----------



## kamie

Hi ladies

Rachel how are things ? good luck for your appointment in june.

RJS good luck with TX next month, sounds like you have been busy getting everything ready.

Kuki how are you doing? 

Well things have been busy here, i was discharged from the hospital on 1st may after having the mc and the same day i came home and booked a hoilday for the three of us. We flew out to turkey on 5th may for 10 nights of sun and relaxation and it was what we needed.
We are still house hunting and i am now starting to visit all the schools so we can start thinking about what school we wnt ds to go to in the new area we are moving to, we have also put ds name down for private school as  a back up so who knows i may need to go back to work when he starts schools to pay for his fees. 

I am okay just taking every day as it comes and still hoping we will have a sibling for ds some day  

love to you all 

Kamie


----------



## rachel1972

hi Kamie glad you were able to get away.  I have still not sorted out ds school but have had a visit to private school with him today he is going for some sessions after half term so like you i will have to pay for fees somehow.  my dh is now working away so dont even know where we will be living in the future and to top it of i have arrange for follow up cos i cant wait time ticks on.


----------



## BooஐWantsBaby

Congratulations tbird!!   wonderful news!!!


----------



## gerbera77

Hi all 

Hope you dont mind me joining you?  Due to have pill scan on Friday to see if I can start DR....feeling nervous!!  

Look forward to getting to know you all!

xx


----------



## gerbera77

tbird - massive congrats!


----------



## kdb

Nonny... I totally understand how you feel - we only ever saw one heartbeat but I still grieved for a couple of weeks for the embie that didn't stick.  What you're feeling is completely natural so give yourself some time, and as you say, stay ++++++++++ for your healthy little beanie xoxo

Tbird - congrats!!


----------



## RJS

Congrats T-Bird!

I am off to Dogus on Saturday for DE IVF. Please keep everything crossed for me. DD is fever pitch with her requests for a sibling - so so hope I can pull it out of the bag for her and us..

xx


----------



## Kuki2010

Rjs,
Good luck in Dogus!!! 
Kukixx


----------



## magsandemma

Hi all


Will try to catch up with the threads and see where everyone at, but just a quickie as feeling like its never gonna happen that we get a sibling!  We were lucky enough to get our daughter from our second ICSI cycle, since then we have had one fresh ISCI and just coming to the end of our second FET cycle otd is wednesday but today we are 12dp3dt and getting bfn so really not looking hopeful.  How do you all cope with all the bfn cycles, we desparately want a sibling for our daughter and she would make the best big sister but time is ticking by and she is 4.5yrs old already, just hard that last two cycles we have had the best embies we have ever had but just no luck at all!!


Good luck to all


Maggie xx


----------



## kamie

Hi Ladies

Welcome Gerbera and Maggie 

Gerbera have you started tx ?

Maggie How are you ? i know it is difficult when tx does not work I have had many of those and my last cycle eneded in MC so i understand that it is difficult, but you are strong and what every tx brings you will get through it.

Rachel how are you? good luck with your appointment end of the month. thinking of you.

kuki how are you doing? thinking of you.

Rjs-        

Well I am all over the place at the moment. We had a follow up appiontment on 29th may which went well and consultant has told us we could go for ivf again as soon as we are ready this time they want me to take clexane and prednisolone through the cycle, also metformin has been bumpped up to three tablets a day. I started the metformin just over three weeks ago and since i went to three tablets a day i am suffering my stomach is killing me will call clinic today and ask for advice. Not sure when to start tx we came out of appointment buzzing and feeling ready to go for it but since having accupunture i am starting to realise i am run down and the metformin is not helpping at the moment.

i am not sure what to do for the best and not sure if i have any more energy to continue tx.

i am going to support group in london on monday so hoping this will help.

Will be back over the weekend just off to a four day wedding so need to get my self packed and out the door.

   for you all where ever you are in your tx.

Kamie


----------



## rachel1972

hi kamie no what you mean about energy levels mine have been so low.  hope you have a great time at the wedding stay in touch. x


----------



## gerbera77

Evening
Kamie - thank you for the welcome.  DH has just done my first stimms injection.......starting to feel real now.  Just a mixbag of nerves, excitement, apprenhension - will we be lucky again?!?!!!  Glad to hear your appointment went well and you can start when you feel ready.  Enjoy the wedding!
Magsandemma - hope you are ok?  Thinking of you...
Hello to everyone else - is anyone else cycling at the moment? xx


----------



## Jujube

Hi Gerbera
I guess you're coming up to OTD soon?  Fingers crossed for you!

I had my baseline scan on Monday and my transfer date scheduled in for July 23rd.  I've got two 4BB blasts in the freezer, so fingers crossed.  

KDB - you must be coming up to cycling again too?!  Anyone else cycling over the summer?

Best of luck all.
J


----------



## kdb

JJ - wow, you have your ET date already?  I presume they are flexible depending on how your lining develops?  (Are you doing a medicated cycle??)

I am on Day 4 of progesterone tabs to induce AF as she didn't turn up naturally (got to Day 70 or something since my last AF which was my first post-BFing... tried acupuncture, moxa, etc but no natural AF sadly).

My ET won't be 'til end of August which gives me an approx OTD of.... hmmm... the day before I start back at work!!

How are you feeling about it all?

I still feel pretty knackered looking after Daniel, nothing like I felt prior to IVF (full of beans!)... but then I guess this is just my new 'normal'.   

xoxo


----------



## Jujube

Hey KDB,
Yeah, they gave me the date when I did the baseline scan.  I'm doing a natural FET - the medicated ones drive my eczema crazy, which isn't good for the old immunes.  I have another scan on Monday (day 10), after which they're hoping to trigger me (assuming lining and follicle size ok), with transfer the following Monday.  All very scary but kind of exciting.....

Bummer on AF not showing up - hope she makes an appearance for you soon....

Exhausted is the new black, eh?  Tell me about it - Arthur woke at 4.30am this morning and again at 5.30am.  I get up at 6am anyway, as I start work at 7.30am (finish at 4.30pm).  DH turned around to me when I was getting dressed about 6.30am this morning to say that he was amazed that Arthur was still asleep - I nearly fired the bottle at his head at that point!!  I've come to the conclusion that the best way to survive working and bring up a little one is to get the best childcare you can afford - ideally a nanny, who will also tidy the house and run some errands for you if you can.  Go in with the attitude of outsourcing everything possible to the nanny!

Chat soon and keep us up to date on progress - you must put up a new piccie of Daniel too, so we can all see how much he's grown!

J


----------



## kdb

JJ - Daniel's birthday in about a week so I'll update the ticker with a new pic.  I *love* the one you have of Arthur in your profile pic - so happy!!  'Exhausted is the new black' indeed     

Remind me, are you doing any immune tx alongside your FET?

xoxo


----------



## Jujube

Hey KDB
Yep, am doing immunes again - I've started clexane and prednisolone, with cyclogest to start post trigger.  Had my first intralipids with Verona Hall this morning - there were 5 other ladies there, four of them pregnant!  It was lovely to chat to others in the same sort of position and Verona was very quiet and unobtrusive.  She nonetheless offered advice and support too, as she's an independent midwife.  It was my first time there but I don't think I'll have any issue going back.  One can't really argue with the price!  I managed to persuade the Lister to prescribe a pack of 10 intralipids and my plan is do two round before the FET (another one planned for next weekend) and then we'll see from there if I get a BFP.  At £100 a shot, it's soooo much cheaper than going back to Dr G with retest, consults and drips.  I'm basically planning to do DIY immunes but we'll see what happens.  

How about you?  What did Dr G say when you saw him?  Will you continue to see him all the way through again?

J


----------



## alexine

Hi Ladies....I'm hoping you won;t mind my me post...

I need some advice. I'm about to cycle for the very last time and think I have just messed up my pill by a few days. I had bloods today and will have to wait until tomorrow and see what my E2 levels say. My consultant says if my E2 is low enough we can go ahead as planned...but I'm nervous. My last cycle was such a cock up due to mistakes. I would really like to wait one more month otherwise if something goes wrong again I will always be thinking I should have waited and got on track properly. 
Also I'm totally stressed out...one of my best friends is going for chemo tomorrow for breast cancer anther good friend is dying of lung cancer...it's been a full on few weeks. 
This clinic in Canada is my last chance...I'm nervous about ******* them off but I would like to delay treatment one more month...or should I just go for it and get it over with?  
I can't think clearly at the moment so would love some perspective.

Thanks!
     to eveyone!
xxA


----------



## Jujube

Hey Alexine
The question I always ask myself in your situation is how will I feel afterwards if it's successful or if it fails?  So if it fails, will I be kicking myself for not waiting a month or did I weigh up the pros and cons and make a reasonable judgement that it was right to go that month?  I would also ask myself what will change between this month and next month if I do delay a month?  Will your friends need more or less support from you?  What about the support you can get from your friends?

Hope this helps......

I'm kind of in the same situation myself - my lining didn't look great on Monday, so I've another scan tomorrow at which it will be either full steam ahead or abandon it and wait another month.....  not sure myself yet as I've never had this problem before.  I feel I want to have as many positives on my side as I can, so I'm veering towards cancelling this round but we will have to see what tomorrow's scan brings....

J


----------



## Dobbie

hey ladies, can I join in please.
Just rang the lab at the hospital today to find out 3 of my 5 embryos survived the thaw and I am in for FET on saturday. I have a wonderful little 19 month old boy who is a real bundle of mischief and trouble LOL
I told them I am only going for 1 embryo back as I am scared of twins so why am I doubting it now that I know that 3 survived. My little boy was one of 2 put back, tell me I am being sensible with only 1 going back or would you all gamble?


----------



## sleepypenguin

Hi dobbie great news on the thaw it really is your choice but as far as i am aware statisticslly the odds of sucess arent much different we had set with Ds as were worried that if we put 2 back and 1 or both split we could have twins/triplets/quads  . Good luck x


----------



## kdb

Dobbie, I think the difference in success rates is something like 8% so not much. P.S. your little man is gorgeous!!!


----------



## Dobbie

old picture of him, he is covered in bumps and bruises now as he is a rufty tufty toddler now LOL
In tomorrow at 11:50, feel guilty for having to take the wee man with me tomorrow in case someone is coming in and sees me with him and thinks its not fair, will have to get hubby to leave me at the door. My OH came in with me for the last FET (it was the first time I had made him come in with me) but will need to be careful tomorrow.


----------



## Dobbie

one little 6 cell embryo on board, wish it luck please!!


----------



## alexine

Dobbie Sending you and your little embie lots of     !
xxA


----------



## LadyN

Lots of luck Dobbie xx


----------



## sabah m

Good luck Dobbie, it was FET that finally worked for me on this thread, will be watching this space....don't worry if you don't get as much rest with LO, if its going to stick, it will


----------



## vickym1984

Wanted to say hello to you all. I probably wont be around that often at the moment as not going for treatment until the new year, but wanted to say hi

We originally TTC'd from May 2006, but we knew I had pcos. Saw the consultant to try and get clomid in 2007, but my BMI was too high. I didnt do anything about it and gained weight, ended up getting clomid in July 09, 3 rounds, all BFN. Then found out my husbands morphology results were poor, so referred for ICSI in 2010, and now have hannah, 19 months

We are looking for treatment in the new year for a sibling x


----------



## staceysm

Hi Ladies,

Can I join you please? 

We are starting our last attempt for a sibling and I feel sick with nerves.  I am just waiting for CD1 which will be this weekend and then I can start my DR drugs.  Gulp!

I worry about posting on my clinic thread sometimes because some of then don't have children and I don't want to sound ungrateful, as I have my DS.

Good luck ladies.

Stacey
X


----------



## vickym1984

stacey    hi hun. I really hope this works for you xx


----------



## littlemouse

Hi ladies, 
Can I join you please x
I have my drug appointment tomorrow to start my 7th icsi. My ds was born after my 6 th icsi in 2010.
We have already decided this is the only shot to give him a brother and sister and my nerves are everywhere. Can't believe I am starting this again, we always said we would stop after being blessed with one child x

Fingers crossed for everyone, lots of love xx


----------



## staceysm

Thanks ladies.

I started my drugs yesterday, so not long now.

I felt really panicky last night and almost wanted to cry.

I am questioning why I am putting myself through this and I why can't I just be grateful for having my DS.

This is our and one only attempt to try for a sibling.  

I am rambling now aren't I! Lol.

X


----------



## vickym1984

Stacey, I know what you mean hun, and I am sure I will be the same xx

Hi littlemouse, good luck with your drug appt today x


----------



## JW3

Hi everyone,

hope you don't mind me jumping on here to ask a quick question.

Does anyone know anything about low dose aspirin?

I was taking this when I had my succesful tx but can't remember exactly when I started it and then when I stopped it.

I recently had a miscarriage    and so now keen to try to replicate what I did the first time in case I manage to get pregnant again, as don't want to lose another.

Thank you

Vicky - hi


----------



## kdb

Jenny, gosh am so sorry to hear your sad news.    Was this a natural BFP?

I took aspirin in my IVF cycle from Day 6 of stimms (mainly for immune reasons) although due to the risk of excessive bleeding at EC most clinics (incl mine) who include aspirin in their protocols say to start only from EC. In a natural or OI cycle obviously you don't have that risk so could start earlier in the cycle, or following the same protocol start at ov and continue through to 10/12w pg. 

Sending you lots of ++++++++


----------



## vickym1984

Jenny no advice but


----------



## JW3

Hello

KDB - yes amazingly was natural pregnancy so was very surprised. Thanks for your help x


----------



## vickym1984

Hi ladies, its gone all quiet on here. 

My husband and I decided to go ahead with attemtpign egg sharing IVF as long as we are accepted for it. Got an initial consultation at Herts & Essex on 3rd December, plus going to their open day 10th Nov just to look round as well. If we are accepted, hoping to cycle Feb/March next year xx


----------



## JW3

Vicky - tons of luck with your tx plans, hope it all goes well


----------



## FlyingCat

Hello, anyone else out there looking to start tx for a second baby in jan feb 2013?

I'm slightly surprised how obsessive I'm becoming about it already... Dd is 10 months now and love her completely! And yet my family doesn't feel complete yet. I feel rather selfish wanting a second when so many on here don't even have one?

Also we were lucky first time last time with an NHS funded cycle, but we can only afford one private shot at ivf. So scared we've had our luck now and won't be successful.

Sorry for disjointed ramble, anyone in a similar position out there?


----------



## vickym1984

Flingcat-Have you thought about egg-sharing IVF to reduce your costs?  We are hoping to do egg sharing IVF/ICSI in the new year. We have an initial consultation on 3rd December, and hoping to be cycling Feb/March x


----------



## FlyingCat

It's something we'd look into once the money runs low /(runs out) but we really want to use the same clinic we used last time and they don't have an egg sharing programme. Definately means hope for the future though, thanks for the thought!
Depending on how dates work out might be cycling at same time as you. Fingers crossed for you!


----------



## vickym1984

Thanks hun. Yes, saw you used Hammersmith, same as us. We haven't even got enough cash for 1 normal private cycle, so have made the move to Herts & Essex Fertility centre instead. Which was a shame as liked HH, although annoyed at HH atm as paid for my notes, and they haven't sent me anything to do with notes during my scans whilst I was stimming, which is the important bit


----------



## JW3

Very sad news from me, had a second miscarriage              not talking or seeing anyone much, had enough of all this


----------



## vickym1984

Oh no Jenny, I am so sorry to hear this. Life is so unfair *hug*


----------



## kdb

Jenny    Oh sweetie, how awful for you and DH       xoxo


----------



## donn1

hi all

just wondered how you all are doing, i have been reading and not posting so now decided to add my contribution, and havea few questions,
I have 2 sons one 9 and other 3 last son concived when i was 40 through icsi, first son through iui, after last son we tried another twice with icsi and on both times were unsuccessful.  I am now 44 yrs and this month have had definate ovulation pains, not on any treatment,  then about day 10 had an extrmemly sharp shooting pain that  went straight through the centre of my ovaries, to my rectum  dont know if it was implantation pain or not, no bleeding with this. since day 10 ave had constant cramping pains and back pain as well as a clear discharge, testing in 2 days time, and am so hoping for a wee miracle.

thanks for reading 
lindsay


----------



## michaelaeloise

Hi flyingcat - im so glad to hear from people in the same boat. We also are very lucky to have our DS but are starting the crazy rollercoaster again with an est e/c of 15th apr. Like you i don't feel like our family is complete but also feel like we are pushing our luck trying again.
I don't want to moan because we are so so lucky to have our son and some people would give the earth for that. I really feel for everyone who is struggling, but im also panicking about what we will do if it doesn't work. It is hard to imagine it not working after last time but its reality, very hard to get my head around though x


----------



## vickym1984

donn-didnnt see this before, no advice hun, but hope it went well x

michaela-I know how you feel, as thats exactly how I feel re trying for another. We have EC next Mon/tues and I find myself automatically thinking I will be pregnant at XYZ time, when there are no guarantees x


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi all, just wondering if I can join you? 
As you can see from my signature we were very lucky to get our darling little boy through our second cycle of ivf last year but I do not feel as though our family is complete so we are embarking on another cycle in June. Like everyone else I am worried that we have used up all our luck and that maybe we should not try again as we are being greedy but then on the other hand it is no different to any other couple ttc another baby we just need a little more help. 

Xx


----------



## vickym1984

Hi Penelope-I understand the feelings completely. Although it took us a little longer to be ready to cycle again, Hannah was quite a handful when she was young lol.

I am now 5+6 with bean number 2, got a scan a week Thursday at the clinic xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi Vickym,

Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on your 2nd bean!! I hope that we are as lucky as you!! 

xxx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Aww congrats  vickym1984 and hello penelope! 

I must admit im not finding it any easier this time, esp with a really difficult toddler, i think it would have been easier to wait a bit, we decided to start treatment when i went back to work, and ever since then my little man has caught everything going from the nursery making him a very twisty/miserable person (understandably)

Have you started tx yet penelope? how did you find it this time around  vickym1984?

I am booked in for my baseline scan tomorrow morning and hopefully should start stimming then. Luckily we are doing ivf lite this time so only a short protocol


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi Michaelaeloise,

Good luck for baseline scan tomoorow. We havent started yet. We're doing a long protocol and hoping to start in May.  Our little one will only be 7 months but we wanted to do it while Im still off work. 

Xxx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Thank you, and i dont blame you! We were initially going to try whilst i was still off - we decided to try the egg donor route but it turned out i wasnt suitable as wouldnt provide enough eggs for 2 people because of my hormone levels. We kinda just left it a while after that and before i knew it i was back at work!! It is so much harder but hopefully the next couple of weeks will fly by.
Good luck, i hope you are enjoying your little one, they grow so quickly dont they! xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

We were hoping to go down the egg donor route too but one of my ovaries is hidden and they can't guarantee they will be able to retrieve any eggs so I'm not suitable either. Our little boy is amazing and we treasure every second with him but the time is racing by and he is changing so much every day!! 

I wish you all the luck for this cycle. Let me know how you get on
Xx


----------



## vickym1984

Thanks ladies. I didnt find it too bad actually this time round, but Hannah is 2, there were a lot of stages (12 months, 15 months, 18 months, 21 months) last year when she was a nightmare and think I would have struggled doingit then.

I did manage to egg share, was concerned as last time only got 9 eggs, but got 17 this time, with only a small tweak to drugs dose, so we got 9 and recipient got 8.  Will email clinic afetr 12 week scan to see how receipient got on


----------



## Moxie

Hello ladies  

May I join you?  I'm TTC naturally now for a sibling for my 13 month old twins.  Still can't believe I'm saying that really considering we had years of infertility and twins on our 3rd ivf cycle. We got a surprise natural bfp in march, but sadly m/c last week  . Before we start treatment again (appointment had been booked before we found out!), we'll give it some time naturally...

How are you all?  Is anyone cycling at the moment?

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi Moxie and everyone else
Moxie so sorry to hear about your m/c. You must be devastated. When are you scheduled to start ivf?

I am due to start a cycle in June. Our gorgeous little boy is 6 months now. I cant concieve naturally so we are totally dependent on ivf. 

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Hi Penelope

Congratulations on your little boy  . I remember 6 months as being a turning point for me when things started getting a little easier. And June isn't that long away now... Hopefully it'll be an exciting and successful time for you!

Yes, I'm devastated. In fact, because I have the boys to look after I'm so busy and although that's helped, it also means the m/c has been pushed to one side and I've been forced to move on quickly.  It was only last week, but already feels such a long time ago.  Would have liked longer to grieve.  Now we know it can happen naturally we'll probably give it until the end of the summer.  I would have been having an embryo put back in may, but I'll leave until September to see what happens...

Will you be having a fresh cycle starting from scratch?

Nice to hear from you and good luck   xx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Hi Moxie

So sorry to hear your horrible news. I hope your little boys keep your mind occupied to make it a little easier for you, such a dreadful thing to go through.

I am currently pupo with 2 embies - got a 14 month old boy, its lovely to hear from others in similar situations xx


----------



## Moxie

Thank you 

Oh, *michaelaeloise* good luck and wishing you very sticky embies   . Keep us posted! Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Moxie,
Yes Im having to start from scratch as we didnt have anything to freeze.  Hoping that if it doesnt work that this time we will have some frozen as dont know if we can afford to pay for another cycle after this one. 

Michaelaeloise, congrats on being pupo!! Fingers crossed for a bfp for you!!

xxxx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Thanks penelope. We were in the same position, had no frosties from nhs cycle and none from this private cycle. Was hoping for some in case it doesnt work to save some money but looks like we'll be saving up again if no luck! xx


----------



## Moxie

*Michaelaeloise* how's your 2ww going? Hope all is well for you.

I'm in my own self induced 2ww now. Got my LH surge Monday so just got to wait and see if another miracle is going to happen this month 

*Penelope*, fingers crossed you get some to freeze. I agree it makes funding another cycle a lot easier! Just feels a little reassuring as well knowing you have more opportunities, especially without going through the physical demands of a fresh cycle.

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi Moxie!

Good luck for your 2ww!! Really hope youdont need ivf this time. 

Michaelaeloise, how are you? Hope 2ww isnt driving you crazy. Fingers crossed for you

I emailed my clinic Mon to ordr drugs ready to start in June!! Starting to feel a bit more real now and some of the emotions starting to come back!!

Xx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Morning! 

The 2ww is driving me nuts!! im nearly halfway there at least. Starting to get af pains but hoping thats a good sign, i guess time will tell. Aww penelope its weird isnt it? i thought this time would be so much easier but its exactly the same as last time 

I bet you are biting your nails too Moxie? good luck, i hope we both get +ve results xxx


----------



## Moxie

Wow, those were early posts!  Penelope were you up out of choice or your lo keeping you up?!  One of mine started stirring at 4:30 and then we were finally all up at 5:45  . Great news you've ordered your drugs, how exciting.  I know what you mean that the emotions all come back when you start booking to try again and I think the worry of it not working never leaves you, even when you have children finally.  Hopefully you'll be a little more relaxed this time round knowing its already worked for you before.  I'm trying to tell myself the same thing!

Michaelaeloise, half way, woo hoo . As you know I'm sure, af pains are completely normal!  It's so frustrating that every symptom you can get could be a sign either way. Everything crossed for you.

I'm trying to keep myself busy.  It took 5 years to work the first time, so why I would think it would work straight away again I don't know ! Xx


----------



## michaelaeloise

It worries me that i am expecting it to work just because it did before and so scared if it doesnt, its really hard to imagine it not isnt it! I think we just drive ourselves mental overthinking everything  

Yes my son is an early riser but i always manage to wake up just before him which is weird! xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi both
I was up feeding my little boy hence the early post! Think he's having a growth spurt! 

I thought that I would fee differently doing a cycle after my little boy but all the old feelings are coming back! I'm convinced it won't work us this time as it took us two goes the last time. Silly I know but as you said its easy to over think everything!!

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Hi all,

Well I tested negative today, although af not due until tues/wed. I know it's early, but I couldn't wait!  Think I'm facing a longer wait than I hoped, but I suppose it's to be expected really!

How are you all getting on? Hope you're enjoying the nice weather.  We've just got back from 4 nights in centerparcs and wish we could have stayed longer.

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Moxie, sorry to hear you had a bfn but as you said its still a bit early so hang on til Weds. Did you have a nice time in centreparcs?

Michaelaeloise, how are things with you? Is the 2ww ovr? Hoping its good news for you

Xx


----------



## michaelaeloise

Moxie - i hope thats not the end of this cycle for you, fingers crossed! which centerparcs did you go to? we are contemplating the one near us (Cumbria).

Penelope - i tested this morning and got a BFP!! well ive been testing for a few days   got my scan on the 24th - im really scared with all the lifting i do with my toddler, hes going through a 'stage' where i cant do anything but. I hope ruin this chance!! How are you getting on? x


----------



## Moxie

*Michaelaeloise* wow a BFP, that's fabulous! Congratulations . Try not to worry about lifting your toddler too much - it seriously won't harm your little bean at all. It's so well padded and protected in there, you'll only be using other muscles to do the lifting. Women all around the world continue to carry older children and even do quite tough manual labour right throughout their pregnancies. Just try not to make yourself too tired ;-)

We went to the Longleat one. It's the second time we've been - first was when the twins were 6 months and now they're 13 months. It's so convenient to have everything on one site, totally geared up to babies and children and I love it. Wouldn't have gone before having the boys, but it's fab for little ones. They also have a crèche and babysitters who come to your villa 

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Congratulations Michaelaeloise!!! I know what you mean about the lifting as I've been worrying about that if we get a bfp as our clinic issues guidelines after embryo transfer and it says not to lift anything during 2ww and early pregnancy but Moxie is right.

Ladies I'm feeling a bit low and don't have anyone to talk to about my feelings.  Most of the time I'm ok with our fertility situation but every now and then I get frustrated and upset by it. I know we are extremely lucky to have our little boy but I can't help but get jealous of others when they get pregnant with such ease. All the nct girls have all started talking about ttc their second baby and it just reminds me that it won't be that easy for us. I have mixed emotions about our upcoming treatment as I'm petrified it won't work. Sorry to bring the mood down I just needed to let off some steam. 
Xx


----------



## Moxie

Penelope sorry to hear you're feeling low and don't apologise for letting off steam - isn't that why we're all here?!  I totally feel the same way alot of the time, made worse now that I've got pregnant naturally after so long and then miscarried. Centerparcs was full of pregnant women - some with lots of children in tow as well!  But I reminded myself that I don't know their stories...  I already have twins and still desperately want to get pregnant again and I know a lot of people on other boards in this site would think that's crazy. You can't help how you feel.  You're a woman and its a built in biological urge to have babies!  You obviously have a strong maternal instinct and there's nothing wrong with that.  My hubby and I talked while we were away about the stress of TTC again and he really doesn't want it to feel the way it did before.  I'm going to try really hard to vent a lot of things to girlie friends (especially in the 2ww - has it worked etc etc!). I think if its an urge you can't ignore then you're going to have to go for it and just try to stay calm and level headed.  Your feelings are totally normal hun and you're not alone   xx


----------



## vickym1984

PP-We are here for you to let off steam. I know the fear of it not working. We gave ourselves 2 go's, luckily it worked on the first, but I was so scared of it not working.


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi everyone,
Hope you have all had a Burbank hol weekend in the sunshine?

Moxie and Vicky thank you for your supportive replies. I'm feeling a little more positive today after having acupuncture.

Xxx


----------



## sabah m

Hello ladies....just wanted to say I remember writing similar posts about jealousy etc prior to my final tx....it can happen!!! I found it hard to believe it would especially as first tx was successful, and I went through some dark depressive moments where I felt I would be better of dead than living wanting....but I am one example of how holding onto the dream can work!! Good luck to all of you xxxxx


----------



## tigershaz

Hello ladies,
I find myself here sooner than I thought I might, our much longed for and loved son is 9 months old, conceived naturally by some small miracle after a long time trying and failed treatments. He is perfect in every way and I am hugely grateful to have him, whilst pregnant we decided that we would have no more treatment in order try and have a sibling, and that if we were very lucky a second time and conceived naturally again then it would be a bonus.
I enjoyed being pregnant and stepping off of the infertility roller coaster, and thought that once he was here I wouldn't have a strong urge to have a second, given the difficult journey it took to have him, but I am now in a place where that strong urge is back, and I really want him to have a sibling.

I am still at peace with the decision not to have further treatment, as i never responded anyway, but know that conceiving naturally is a very long shot given my age, I really don't want this to take over life again, I want to enjoy my gorgeous son and not be thinking about not being pregnant every month, dh is more laid back about it all but I guess it's much harder to ignore that maternal urge. Worrying about how many years we give it before we draw a line in the sand, give away the baby stuff and move forward as a family of three.

Anyhow, I just wanted to say hi, and that if its ok I will be joining you in a "non treatment,hoping we have another miracle" kind of way. Wishing lots of baby dust to you all.
Tigershaz x


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## Moxie

Hi Tigershaz, welcome  

You sound really confident with your reasoning and decisions which is really good for you.  I really hope you conceive naturally very soon!

We're also trying to conceive our next one naturally, but I'm already impatient!  Our consent appointment is booked at the clinic for 4th June, but don't plan on having any embies back until September - hoping it works naturally before that.

That maternal urge is something a lot of ladies on here are experiencing even after having one (or more!) and it's so hard to ignore.  We've been through discussions on emotional impact of trying again/treatment, financial implication of having another one, space in the car, schooling etc etc and still come to the conclusion that we simply want another one to love and nurture  . It's already stressing hubby out though, so I'm having to stop telling him about the ovulation tests, hehe!

Anyway, good luck, keep us posted xx


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## kdb

Penelope - I feel EXACTLY the same......... everywhere I go where there are children my son's age, most (at least it seems to me like it's 'most') of the mum's either have a little baby strapped to them or in a buggy, or have a bump.

I'm an only child myself and I *really* do not want the same for my son.

I also want to close the door on all this fertility [email protected] and get on with our lives!

Best of luck honeybee xoxo


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## Moxie

Hello ladies, hope you're all well..?

*Michaelaeloise* how did the scan go?

Xx


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## michaelaeloise

Hi moxie - I've got to go back in 2 weeks for another scan. Baby is fine, measured spot on and saw heartbeat but there's a second sac which needs checking just to be on the safe side. I can't imagine anything will come of it as the same happened last time, so glad I opted for det again! How are yo. Getting on?


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## Penelope Pitstop

Morning ladies!

Great news on scan Michaelaeloise!! 

Moxie how are things with you?

Honeybee, it is hard isnt it. Infertility does take ovr your life. 

Xx


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## charlie14

Hi all can I join. I have a 3 year old son from my 1st ivf attempt which was successful.

 I am currently 7dp5dt after having a grade 1cc and 2cc blasts put back a little worried about the grade. I tested this morning with a BFN but I know it's probably too early I tested because I got a positive with my son at 7 days but it was fresh I hear that frozen are slower to implant. I had a lot of aches around what i think was implantation time, boobs have hurt so bad last 2 days my son couldn't cuddle me, nipples sore and even had white stuff coming from one of the spots on my boobs dunno what that is all about and I'm seriously bloated and just feel pregnant and I felt all this first time so I'm just keeping my fingers crossed

Sorry for the long post


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## Moxie

Welcome *Charlie* . Yay for being pupo, hopefully it was just too early to test and you get your positive in a few more days. I know everyone is different and even every pregnancy for one person is different so you just never know.

That's great news about the scan *michaelaeloise*! You must be so happy!

Afm, got my appointment at the clinic next week, but waiting in the meantime to find out if this month has worked - 7 days to go. As usual, not holding out much hope, but feeling quite relaxed and positive. Thoroughly enjoying the good weather this weekend though and my boys are really starting to explore outside now. I just have a battle keeping them from putting gravel in their mouths all the time  xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Welcome Charlie and congratulations on being pupo!! Im with Moxie, each pregnancy is different and it may just be a little early for you to get that bfp. Fingers crossed for you.

Moxie, do you know when you will be starting treatment if you dont get pregnant naturally?

My drugs are arrivung Fri and Im starting DR the following Sat!!

Xx


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## Bluebell44

Hi everyone, can I join you? I have one son Finlay from my first IVF who is 8 months. I also have 2 frostie's waiting.....I have a natural BFP after 3 months of trying when AF returned. We are truly shocked and very happy but increasingly nervous of all the milestones. I work out ill be 5+4 today calculated from the first day of my AF. We had unexplained fertility and were trying for 3 yrs previously. It's exciting but feel a bit weird as I've not told anyone yet. It's lovely to find a group where I belong again. I've not been to the doctor yet as I am waiting for the clearblue test to turn to 3+, it's move on to 2-3 so hopefully that's a good sign. Ill test again Thursday. Then ill book an early private scan. Good luck to everyone xxxxx


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## michaelaeloise

Aww congrats Bluebell! i always love hearing stories of natural pregnancies after ivf! I bet you are really nervous though, its such a long waiting game isnt it!! i am 7+4 now, have had an early scan but still cant rest until the little bundle is here.  I hope the next week goes quick for you xx


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## Moxie

Hi *Bluebell*, congratulations! That's fabulous news and I really hope it goes well for you. Apparently, a great grandmother of mine who I never met, used to swear that having a baby sorted out your 'system' - thought it was a load of twaddle if I'm honest, but I too got a surprise natural bfp after 3 years of unexplained infertility and ivf twins 

*Penelope*, wow you're starting soon, how exciting! Fingers crossed it works for you. In answer to your question, I wasn't going to start treatment again until September, but it's getting brought forward in my mind already. Not sure if I can wait indefinitely for another natural miracle and the pressure of TTC again is not sitting well with hubby... Might end up with a transfer a similar time to you... Xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Hi all,

Bluebell, huge congratulations on your natural bfp! Hope you get your 3+ when you test again tomorrow.

Movie, I can totally understand why you would want to move treatment forward. Ttc is hard. I'm finding some of the old feelings are creeping back. A lot of my friends are talking about ttc baby number 2 already and I'm finding it hard as worrying about being left behind again.

Xx


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## Moxie

Aww Penelope try not to worry about being left behind.  I found a lot of people talk about number 2/3 etc, but take a bit longer to actually get round to it  . Lots of people worry about the impact of going from one to two children as well which slows them down a little.  Hopefully they're not being insensitive to you if they know what you've been through?  Xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Thanks Moxie. There are being a bit insensitive but people forget so easily when they haven't been through it themselves. What day is your appointment?
Xx


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## Moxie

I agree, I think it must be hard for people to imagine how it feels unless they've been there themselves.  I think they probably think 'well you've done it once, I'm sure it'll happen again'!?!  Everything crossed for you  

My appointment is Tuesday.  Hopefully they'll be able to do the scan and then I can book in when I'm ready xx


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## Bluebell44

Hi everyone thank you for the welcome and big hugs to you all. I'm on my phone but will begin the computer at the weekend and write some personals. Well I did my test at 4am this morning when I woke up and it's 3+ so am going to try and stop testing now and book an early scan soon. I really hope my natural BFP brings some luck and baby dust your way xxx.


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## Penelope Pitstop

Yeay Bluebell, great news on the 3+ test!!! Step away from the pregnancy tests now!!! 

Moxie, good luck for your appointment on Tuesday. Let us know how you get on. 

My drugs arrived today so its starting to feel a bit more real now!!!


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## Moxie

Good luck Penelope xx must be weird having the drugs in the house again and waiting to start them.  How did you respond before?  Try to be more relaxed this time round, you have a little one now so hopefully some of that pressure is off (not all of it I know!). And your little one should keep you busy too   xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Evening Moxie.

I normally respond quite well but I have hydrosalpinx which gets bigger with IVF and can block access to one of my ovaries so they can't always retrieve eggs from both ovaries. 

I think I'm more relaxed than last time because I have my little man but I'm still worrying that it won't work. 

Xxx


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## Moxie

Hi *Penelope*, sorry it's taken a day to reply! Well, I really hope for you that they can access both your ovaries, the more eggs the better! Of course it only takes one in the end, but a few help to keep you feeling reassured . Keep us posted on how you're getting on. So when will embryo transfer be assuming all goes well?

My appointment at the clinic is tues which is also the day af is due, so if nothing worked this month at least I'll have a treatment plan to lift my spirits. So excited now as hubby has agreed we can have a little frostie back in July. Can't wait!

Hello to everyone else too, hope you're all keeping well xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Great news to hubby agreeing to having a frostie back in July!! How exciting! Not long to go at all!! I'm crossing my fingers that you get your bfp before that though!! 

My egg collection is provisionally scheduled for week commencing 15 July if all goes well so we may be pupo around the same time!

Hi to everyone else. Hope those with bfps are well.

Xxx


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## Moxie

Penelope your finger crossing must be super lucky... Supposed to have my appointment today and af not arrived so tested just in case - got a BFP!  Well, more like a little, faint positive than a big fat one, but positive nonetheless  .  Can't believe another natural one after everything.  Praying this one is stickier than the last  . Also found out though, that from bloods taken during the miscarriage this year, that I have antiK antibodies present so potential to cause haemolytic disease of the newborn - eek!  Why is nothing ever straightforward for some of us?!

Hello to all, hope you're all well xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Oh wow Moxie that's fab news. I'll keep my super lucky crossed fingers crossed that you have a healthy 9 months.  Hopefully they will work for me too!!!

Xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Evening all!

How is everyone?

I started down regging today and just wondered if those of you who have have conceived siblings with ivf have any tips for going through treatment with a little one.

Xx


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## michaelaeloise

Hi Penelope

Wow glad to hear you have started DR - time seems to be flying. I must admit it was a lot more tiring this time around with a little one already but i found if yor partner is able to, get them to watch little one for even just half an hour now and then whilst you try and have a nap. I personally forgot how tiring and rubbish the medication makes you feel, the first time it was so easy to just go and have a nap. Good luck, keep us updated x


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## Penelope Pitstop

Thanks for that tip Michaelaeloise. Have you got your 2nd scan this week? X


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## michaelaeloise

I had my 2nd scan on friday - theres still another sac there but doesnt look like its another baby, just something for them to keep an eye on. The consultant seemed very confused that i havent bled.... Not sure what to make of it!! Hopefully by my scan at 12wks all should be normal. I had a similar experience with my first pregnancy but i hard earlier scans and it had disappeared by my 7week one.

Hope you are getting on ok, it does fly by i must admit xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

I hope you are feeling well? Are they sure 2nd sac isn't a baby?

All ok here thanks. Did you do anything different with this cycle? Did you still carry little one during 2ww? What did you do with your little boy when you went for EC and ET ? We haven't told anyone we are having treatment so not sure what to do if we get to that stage.

Xx


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## Moxie

Hi all. 

Penelope great to hear you're dr now.  I remember getting headaches and moody!  I know we haven't got as far as treatment this time but we only got the BFP on the day of the appointment so childcare was booked etc.  my plan was to get mother in law to babysit (you could go with whoever normally might have your lo if you're busy) and tell her I had a dentist appointment - I had prepped her with my story of sensitive teeth, next would be an appointment to check it out, then back to have a filling, then any other extra appointments for issues arising with the filling, haha!  Don't know if that'll work for you, just an idea.  Also I have carried both my twins throughout the first few weeks as I have no choice.  Not sure how much yours weighs, but mine are 9kg and 11kg ish.  All I'm doing now is trying not to carry them both at the same time. I think it's just what your body is used to and take help and rest where you can.

I've been driving myself crazy with pee sticks  . I made the mistake of doing the digital ones with conception indicator... I won't bother next time because it just worried me when I didn't get it to change from 1-2 weeks to 2-3 weeks when I thought it should!  I had low hormones when I had mc so have been very paranoid and anxious.  I finally do have a 2-3 today though and I'm 4+5 so I think that's ok!?!

Anyway, hope everyone is doing well.  Have a good evening all xx


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## michaelaeloise

He seemed happy enough for me not to have anymore private scans so i would assume he is certain there isnt 2 babies. The consultant did mention that i should let the doctor know though so i guess i'll see soon. Cant imagine anything will come of it but its weird!

I dont think i did anything different apart from what you mentioned, we never told anyone this time apart from parents - it was far too stressful last time and easier kept to ourselves. I found it really frustrating that people dont understand how hard it is unless they have been there, so to save getting into these situations we kept it quiet. For the EC and ET i just left my little one at nursery - he goes there full time, do you have that possibility? I did pick him up early the day of my ET and just carried on as normal. At first i panicked everytime i picked him up, esp putting him in car seat as you know how difficult that is anyhow but then you just kinda get used to it... does that make sense? i googled about it loads to put my mind at rest but i do really believe now that theres not much chance of damaging your chances of implantation etc by lifting, the warnings about lifting are more to do with the shift in weight later in pregnancy and falling.... 

Im sure if you were really stuck for somewhere to take your little one whilst going to theatre that the clinic could help? i have taken my little one in a few times and they seemed very understanding x


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## Penelope Pitstop

Michaelaeloise and Moxie,  thanks for the tips on what to do with little one during treatment. I dont have the option of nursery at the moment but I like the idea of the dental treatment!!! Either that or I will just go it alone and hubby can look after him. I did ET on my own last time as hubby was away with work in Seattle I just didnt fancy doing EC on my own as I bled alot last time and it was a bit traumatic. 

xxx


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## Clomper

Hi ladies,

I hope you don't mind me joining you!! I have a 13 month old son from my first try at IVF     , and had a surprise BFP naturally in January, sadly miscarried in February    
We are hoping to TTC naturally again now, but am going crazy monitoring ovulation etc on my own!! 
I will go back a little to try to get to know yo all a little better but is anyone else TTC naturally for a sibling?

Clomper xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Hi all! 
Welcome Clomper. So sorry to hear about your miscarriage. 

I'm not ttc naturally but there are a few ladies on here that were and have got bfps. 

Hi to everyone else. Moxie, how are you doing? Michaelaeloise, hope you are well

Afm, I'm very emotional today. Mixture of meds,pmt and worries about the treatment but I'm sure I'll be fine again tomorrow as I have acupuncture.

Xx


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## Clomper

Hi Penelope, thanks for the welcome, I see you are on dr now, sorry you are feeling emotional, it is all very stressful isn't it? I hope you start to feel a bit better after the acupuncture, and keep   

xx


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## Moxie

Hello all 

Welcome *Clomper*. We have a couple of things in common - BFP through ivf then a natural BFP only to end in m/c! I'm so sorry to hear about your loss and understand how emotional and hard it is to go through. How are you feeling now? I lost mine at 8 weeks in April :-(. As you can see from my signature though, I'm pregnant again with a gap of only 6 weeks. I'm still totally in shock and wondering what on earth was wrong with us for years before we had the twins! I really think your body has shown you now that it can be done and its only a matter of time before you get your next BFP. Wishing you lots of luck! I see you're driving yourself potty with ovulation tests etc. I think it is all in the timing and one thing that may have made a difference in the months that it worked for us this year was that we hadn't done the deed between the end of af and the LH surge (by chance the first time, but on purpose the second time!). Don't know if that makes any difference, but it may have done for us... Anyway stay on here and keep us posted.

*Penelope*, relax and enjoy the acupuncture tomorrow, I've heard it can really help. Here's a hug coz you're emotional 

Afm, crazy knicker checking every time I go to the toilet afraid of m/c again! Scan at the epu booked for next Monday 24th so just sitting tight until then. Had my first ever night without the boys last night as they stayed with my mum and hubby and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary. Felt sooooo strange without them, but I actually had the first uninterrupted nights sleep since they were born (one sleeps well and the other never does!).

*Michaelaeloise* hope all is still well xx


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## Clomper

Hi Moxie,

Wow we have a lot in common!! All I need now is another natural BFP    !! I feel ok about the miscarriage now, just still a little angry because I was quite happy to wait patiently to conceive again, but having got pregnant and lost it now I feel all the old feelings of being desperate to conceive again!!    I may try and hold off doing the dead before LH surge this month then,I must admit that a lot of people say the more   the better, but I'm not so sure that forcing it every day all month is the answer!! I bet you are totally paranoid about this pregnancy now, if I am lucky enough to conceive again, I will be exactly the same!! I'm sure you will be just fine though hun. 
Your twins are only a couple of months older than my son, you must be so exhausted being pregnant with one of them not sleeping well, I find one hard enough to keep up with and he's not even walking yet!!! I hope you feel better for a good night's sleep!!

Clomper xx


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## Moxie

Hi Clomper,

I noticed ours were a similar age and I love your little ones name . I'm excitedly prematurely looking for names, hehe! I have a Rowan Edward and Heath George at the moment... Ideas welcome! I am exhausted a lot of the time I suppose, but I've just got used to it. I really wish Heath would sleep better though, especially now I'm pregnant. He comes in with us during the night and sleeps better like that most of the time, but I'm worried about us all sleeping badly in one bed when the next one arrives! We're going to move him back into his cot before its born hopefully. And I understand that feeling now you've been pregnant but lost it, it seems to bring back that sense of helplessness that you have with infertility in general. It will happen again for you though, I'm sure, so stay positive  xx


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## michaelaeloise

Hi All

I havent been on here much so thought i would see how you all are. Moxie, how far on are you now? i bet you are counting down the days!! Penelope - when do you start stimming roughly? bet you cant wait!

Hi clomper, lovely to hear from others!

well i am 10+3 now, had midwife booking appt yest, still cant wait for 12 week scan so i can relax a bit!! also suffering badly with tiredness - we have an early riser! x


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## Moxie

Hi michaelaeloise, glad to hear all is well.  Roll on the 12 week scan!  Hopefully the tiredness will ease up a little bit in the second trimester... Only to return in the third!  Just remember all these symptoms are a really good sign things are still going well.

I'm 6 weeks today.  First early scan in 5 days and counting... Xx


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## Clomper

Hi Michaelaeloise, I remember that tiredness so well, I used to get halfway round the supermarket and be longing to just dump the trolley and go home!! Hope you get a little energy back soon! Not long till your 12 week scan  

Hi Moxie, I'm sure the 5 days will fly by with your two to keep you busy   I love your boys names too, I dont know any Rowans' or Heaths'! I'm sure Heath will start to sleep better soon, my brother and his wife have just had baby number 4 (   ), and their 2 year old was still in their room until a few months ago, and still really disturbing them in the night, but he moved into his own room and started sleeping through in time for the new baby!!

Penelope, how are feeling now? How is DR going? When do you start stimms?

Well   turned up this afternoon, two days early! I am gutted, but I was fairly sure things hadn't worked this month as my temp started dropping a few days ago. So we are now on day 1 of the next cycle... I hope this is the one   

Hi to any others on this thread    

Clomper xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Morning everyone!

4 days and counting to scan Moxie!!

Clomper, sorry to hear the witch arrived. Hoping this is the cycle you get your bfp.

Michaelaeloise, hoping the tiredness subsides soon. 

Afm, things aren't going quite to plan. I've been dr for 12 days and no sign of AF. I'm getting stressed about it which isn't helping. Rang clinic and they said not to worry about it and to come in for baseline scan as planned but I don't see the point if lining isn't going to be thin enough! I didn't have this problem the last time. I can't help but worry that this is an indication that the rest of the cycle is going to go wrong!!  Apart from my little emotional wobble I was so much more relaxed this time but that's gone out the window!! My baseline isn't until 1st July so May wait until Mon before contacting the clinic again. Sorry to moan ladies.

Xxx


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## Moxie

Oh Clomper, boo to day 1  . On the positive though, only about 2 weeks until you have your next shot at being pregnant  . That's the way I always tried to look at... Could be very soon for you, fingers crossed.

Penelope, try not to get too stressed about the time it's taking to d/r.  I'm not sure I've ever heard of someone not being able to d/r - I think it's inevitable and just a matter of time (I think mine took 14 days and worried me a little). I'm sure af will appear in the next couple of days. I assume you've got enough drugs to last you longer?  And it doesn't mean it's a sign of bad things to come this cycle so put that put of your mind completely   !  Stay positive  

Hello to everyone else too   xx


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## Moxie

Oh *Clomper*, I wanted to ask if that's ok - was your brother and his wife proactive about getting their 2 year old into his own bed or did he just do it in time all by himself. How did it happen?! I suppose I'm just scared of Heath's reaction to moving him, but I know we need our bed back the time the baby arrives. He'll be about 2 as well so I was hoping he might like the idea of his own bed by then anyway..?! Thank you


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## Clomper

Hi Moxie,

My brother and his wife first moved him in with his older brother for a few weeks, but then on his own. They made it as exciting as they could for him, saying about his "new room" etc. They decorated it all new for him and he had a new big boys bed so was quite happy. They did have a few nights of having to sit with him for a couple of hours until he was asleep, and a few nights of him coming into their room asking for milk but he has settled in now and seems fine about the new baby being in with mummy and daddy. 
Do Heath and Rowan usually share a room?
3 days to go now   

Penelope, it took me about 14 days to bleed on dr too and they said it was fine, so try not to worry hun, you will get there in the end.

Hi Michaelaeloise!  

xx


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## Moxie

Hi all  

Clomper, thanks for that.  I think I've got a plan, just going to wait another few months to implement it.  He goes to sleep quite quickly in his cot in the same room as his brother, but when he wakes in the night and won't resettle in his cot, then he comes in with us for the rest.  Rowan sleeps through.  Actually last night was odd - they went to bed at 7 and we didn't hear a peep from either until 5:15 - Heath slept all night in his cot!  Think its just a one off though, we'll see tonight!

Penelope, any sign of af yet?  How are you feeling? Xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Evening all!!

Moxie, sounds like you had a good night Thurs. How was last night?!? Only one day to go until scan!!! I really hope it goes well!!

Michaelaeloise, how are you? 

Clomper thank you for sharing your experience. It helps to know Im not the only one who took a bit longer to get AF. I dont think the advice sheet that states 7-10 days helps. They need to put a note stating that other people can and do take longer if only to stop people like me getting so stressed!!!

Well, AF finally arrived on day 13 (Thurs) after I got back in touch with the clinic to ask if there was anything they could do. So, I am much happier again and back to my semi-relaxed state!!!


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## michaelaeloise

Hi penelope - glad to hear AF arrived at last!! on to the next step  

All good here - i am mega tired though! i didnt think it would be this tough second time, my DS is going through a very testing stage which isnt helping but its not his fault bless him!

How is everyone else?

Got my 12 week scan next tuesday so looking forward to hopefully hearing all is well x


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## Penelope Pitstop

Thinking of you for your scan today Moxie xx


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## Moxie

Thank you Penelope   3 hours to go.  Im so nervous its silly!  Good to hear af turned up, that's one stage done. You must be relieved and hopefully now a bit more positive xx

Hi everyone else  

I sure ill be back later with my update   Xx


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## Clomper

Hi ladies,

Penelope, glad that AF has turned up! You will be ready for stimms before you know it!    I also contacted my clinic when AF hadn't turned up thinking it was all going wrong!!! It is such a worrying time, I'm sure things will go well for you, and you will get your BFP at the end   

Moxie, good luck!!!! Looking forward to hearing your news   

Michaelaeloise, wow 12 weeks soon then!!    I remember needing matchsticks to keep my eyes open. It must be hard with LO giving you the run around too!! 

I have made some inquiries about acupuncture, and am hoping this may help with a natural BFP. I am also seeing the doctor this morning to get a referral back to the gynae, to have my endometriosis checked, and find out if we should be thinking of another round of IVF...

xx


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## michaelaeloise

Good luck moxie!!


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## Moxie

Clomper, hope the doctors appointment went well this morning?  Did you get the referral?

Well, I had my scan and it was a mixed bag.  We've definitely got a live intrauterine pregnancy and saw a heart beat.  That's great news.  Not so great news is that it's measuring small.  They wouldn't give me an exact date, only a crown to rump length measurement for me to google and analyse, but would say its at least a week small.  Tricky to accept when I know when I got my LH surge, know when I dtd etc.  I'm now quite scared the same is going to happen as last time.  When I m/c the baby just wasn't growing enough.  I'm trying to stay positive, especially because hubby seems a bit more upset this time round, but I've got an agonising wait for a rescan in 2 weeks on 8th July.  The positive is that it's definitely growing better than the last one, but will it grow well enough that's the question    Another awful 2ww!

Hugs for you all   xx


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## Clomper

Moxie, oh hun I would take that as good news, you have a heartbeat and the baby is growing which is great.   
I can imagine now you are going to be going crazy waiting for the next two weeks to be sure little one continues to grow nicely. 
It is terrible when they only give you enough information for you to google and find the worst case scenario!!!! 
I know you say that you know when your LH surge was, but with a natural pregnancy you can't be 100% certain when the egg fertilised or when the embryo implanted, so there can still be lots of variables that could affect the size and dates of your little bean!!
I hope you aren't too worried and hubby is ok    

I saw the doctor this morning, she has agreed to refer me to my gynae for my endometriosis    At least she will be able to tell me if I am waisting my time trying for another natural BFP!!

I am also having my first acupuncture consultation on thursday    Has anyone else tried acupuncture for their fertility?

xxx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Evening all! 

Moxie, Im with Clomper, I think its good news but can totally understand why you would be worried given your previous experience and the lack of info given to you at appointment today. I hope the next two weeks dont go go too slowly for you!!

Clomper, glad gp agreed to refer you. I have acupuncture whilst I have treatment. I find it reaaly relaxing. I hope your first appointment goes well. 

Xx


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## Moxie

Hi ladies

Clomper and Penelope thank you for your wise words, I know you're right.  With ivf you know your dates and I'm not used to this whole 'natural' thing!  Now that the day is almost over, I'm actually quite cross that they let me walk out of there today with such a negative outlook.  I had no feedback, explanations or reassurances; just a couple of printed sentences that the nurse read out to me and an appointment for 2 weeks  . Hey Ho, I will plod through the weeks and await Mother Nature's decision - with a more positive outlook than I had this morning!

Clomper that's great you got your referral, hope it comes through quickly for you.  A friend of mine who has had several pregnancies (sadly lost) had acupuncture through that time and really benefited from it.  She's currently 22 weeks and had reflexology this time round.  She made me promise to get some if I didn't conceive because she really thinks it helped her.  Maybe think about that too if you can stretch that far?

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Hey ladies, thought I'd stop by and say hello  

Clomper, how did acupuncture go yesterday?

Penelope, how are you getting on?  Still feeling positive I hope xx

I'm desperately trying to keep myself busy passing the time until the next scan. No bleeding yet so still  . Hang in there little bean! 

Xx


----------



## Clomper

Hello ladies,

Moxie, the acupuncture was a little strange to me, but I am feeling quite positive about it. We changed my appointment to wednesday, and although I think I would have rathered a woman, I really do feel like it's done something. I had lots of pain in my ovaries that evening, and felt really heavy as if getting the flu but by yesterday morning I was absolutely full of the joys!!    I have had lots more energy, and am feeling positive about this cycle now. I have another appointment on tuesday around ovulation time... 

How are you feeling now? I have every confidence that all is well for you hun, and like you say no bleeding is an excellent sign! Have you any nausea yet?

I wanted to mention that a friend of mine who had been having lots of trouble with her son sleeping has got some advice from a sleep trainer in the last week, and although he had been sleeping in her bed every night for months, he slept in his own bed from 7.30 to 5.45 last night for the first time!!! I think they have been told to lie on his bedroom floor when he is crying in his bed, and they have had some nights where they have had to lie there for hours, but in only just over a week he has done so well. Is Heath still a night owl or has he started sleeping in his cot? It must be very difficult when you don't want him to wake Rowan up!!

Penelope, how are you feeling? Is your scan on monday? Or am I dreaming that?!

Michaelaeloise, how are you? Not long till your 12 week scan now   

xxx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Afternoon all!

Moxie, no bleeding is a great sign. I know how you feel though trying to pass the time waiting for appointments. On the one hand you dont want to wish the time away as being pregnant is such a precious gift but on the other hand you just want the scan to be here so that you can put your mind at rest!! Did you say the scan is  in 2 weeks (well one now)? 

Clomper, Im glad that your acupuncture went well albeit a bit strange to begin with. I find it really relaxing and helps keep me feeling positive. I also find positive visualisation cd's help but they aren't for everyone.  Zita West does one and there's an american one that is really good. Let me know if you want the name of the website.  You are right my baseline scan is Monday. I have a mixture of feelings at the moment. Excited as I just want to get going as feels like I have been down regging for absolutely ages now but I'm also a bit apprehensive. This may sound silly but at this stage in the treatment I still have the hope that it will work and we will get another bfp but the further along we go and the closer to EC/ET and if we get to the 2ww stage I feel that, that hope fades. Anyway ignore me, I am mostly positive and ready to get going!!

Hope everyone else is well? Michaelaeloise, count down to 12 week scan. Bet you cant wait!! Hope the tiredness is going. 

xxx


----------



## Clomper

Hi ladies,

I'm hoping for some advice. Did any of you use the clearblue advanced ovulation tests? I have been testing and this morning have a flashing smiley, does that mean I will ovulate in the next couple of days? I don't want to keep dtd every day to find I dont ovulate for a week and it's been a bit of a waste of time as I dont think it's very good for DP's sperm levels!! 

Any advice would be welcome!!   

xxx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi Clomper,
I used to use the clear blue fertility monitor and that used to detect the Lh surge which was 12 hours before OV. Not sure if the sticks are the same but would assume they are and a smiley woukd bean you are fertile. Maybe someone else can help more than me!!

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

P.s ignore spelling Im on my phone!!


----------



## Clomper

Thanks Penelope,

It is supposed to mean I am fertile, but not at peak fertility! Last month we dtd every day for about 10 days and (sorry for tmi!!) we both thought it was a bit non productive, and made me a bit sore   so this month we really wanted to try and keep back for the best time!!!   

Oh well, we shall see!!    

xxx


----------



## Moxie

Morning girls,

Penelope, you're right to still be positive, keep going, this could be a BFP for you fingered crossed!  Good luck on Monday.

Clomper, thanks for letting me know about your friend's baby.  It's so good to hear that it can happen and we'll start encouraging him in a few months time...  Meanwhile he's done 4 nights in the last week all by himself in his own bed so its a really good sign that he can do it.  Re the ovulation tests, I used the clearblue smiley face ones too.  This last cycle that was successful we waited to dtd from end of af until the night of the smiley face.  Then hubby was working nights for a few nights and I went to stay with my mum so that was the only night we did it!  It also worked that way earlier on in the year for us.  Definitely dtd on the night of smiley face then perhaps leave it a night and try again the night after to cover all bases!  Yay, good luck!

Xx


----------



## Bluebell44

Hi everyone,
Sorry some sad news from me. We saw a first heartbeat at 7 weeks but had another scan yesterday and it had gone to be with the angels at 7+5. I haven't bled yet so need to decide whether op or tablets I can't decide any advice would be appreciated. Sorry I haven't been on for a while and not been posting I have been reading. Moxie I am sending you all the luck in the world for your next scan. So many things crossed. Sorry I will go on the laptop soon and pm everyone but I am thinking of you all xxxx


----------



## Moxie

Oh Bluebell I'm so, so sorry to hear your news.  How devastating for you and how cruel nature is. There's very little I can say to help or make you feel better, but I do share your pain and I'm sending you a big hug  . As far as what to do re the meds or the op, I'm not much help because my m/c happened naturally and I didn't need any further intervention.  I actually stated bleeding the day I first saw the heartbeat, but the baby was so small we kind of knew it would never make it.  Now currently facing the prospect of another m/c (although I'm trying to stay positive) I must admit I would probably avoid the op if i could, let nature (or the meds) take its course and only resort to the op if medically necessary.  However, I haven't had the rundown of the pros and cons of both from any medical staff...  I'm just so sad for you and please pm me if you want to chat xx


----------



## Clomper

Hi Bluebell, 

I don't think I have spoken to you on here yet. Just wanted to say I am so sorry. It is so horrid to have such a miracle given to you to be taken away just as quickly! 

I also found my little bean had stopped growing at the start of the year but my pregnancy had carried on progressing as normal, and they said it could continue for some weeks so i chose to have the surgical miscarriage. They got me in the following day first thing, and it was done under general so when I woke up it was all over. I was just glad to get rid of the horrid morning sickness as it was all for nothing, and felt I could move on more quickly.

It is your decision, and you do what you feel comfortable with. As Moxie said, if you need to chat feel free. It is so heartbreaking    

xxx


----------



## Clomper

Ok so I have a solid smiley face today on day 13, I am ovulating    

Wish me luck ladies!!    

xxx


----------



## Moxie

Good luck Clomper   ! Xx


----------



## Bluebell44

Thank you so much Moxie for your mind words. I so hope your second scan shows a healthy growing bean, I'm keeping everything crossed. We've decided to have the ERPC and should have it Tuesday I can't face seeing any big tissue clots or even a sac and would prefer to get it over and move on. It's crazy isn't it? We all couldn't get pregnant naturally but now we can but can't keep it!! Why is this? Moxie prove us wrong!!! Xxx thoughts are with you xxxx

Clomper - thank you for your lovely words and sorry for your previous loss. Hope you're having some Sunday fun xxx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Bluebell so so sorry my lovely. There is nothing I can say to ease your pain at the moment but sending you big big hugs and thinking of you. 

Clomper good luck! Hope you managed to dtd !! 

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Penelope, good luck tomorrow. Hope it all looks good and you can move onto the next stage   xx


----------



## Clomper

Penelope, good luck this morning, look forward to hearing how it went, and what your plan is from here...   

Moxie, that's brill that Heath slept in his own bed for 4 nights last week, he will definitely get the hang of it in no time!   

Michaelaeloise, hope you are well and DS isnt running you too ragged!! My DS is going through the tantrum stage at the moment, starting to want everything his own way!!!

Bluebell, I hope you are ok hun, good luck for tomorrow. And like I said we are here if you need to chat. 

I did another test this morning, and smiley face is gone but temp is still down, not sure what that means but we dtd twice yesterday so FX!!!   

xxx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi all!

Thanks for the well wishes this morning! We had a bad night with little one (well its been a few bad nights, long story but he has had diarrhoea for two weeks now and have been battling with the doctors to get a diagnosis or some treatment) so this morning I was very tired and hormonal so threw a massive tantrum and was all set to cancel treatment!!! Anyway, I calmed down and went to baseline scan and all is ok so will start stimms on Weds. I did think it was going to be today but they have moved it to Weds so Im stimmulating as long as last time as was at risk of OHSS. 

I hope everyone else is ok? 

xxx


----------



## beckalouise

Hi all hoping to join you  

Just had my day21 prostap (DR) to prepare for our 1st FET. We were blessed to get DS from 1st ICSI and now have 4 frosties awaiting  .  Feel really nervous about starting the process all again but it's our only hope of a sibling for Austin so needs must! 

Hope everybody else is doing ok

Beckalouise x


----------



## Clomper

Hi ladies!

Penelope, oh your poor LO, I hope he gets better soon, and you can get some rest!! I remember being foul on the IVF drugs, then when I got pregnant I used to have some awful tantrums!! Once threw my ipad into the sink, smashed the sink and the ipad, then cried for hours!! That was without a LO keeping from sleeping at night. OH was walking on eggshells with me for weeks!!!    Great news on your scan and starting stimms on wednesday!!! Do you know roughly when they anticipate EC? How exciting!!    

Welcome Beckalouise, my nephew and only godson is named Austin, love it!!    Your signature has moved me, how bitter sweet life can be!  
So do you know when you will be having your FET? 

I have my second acupuncture session tomorrow, as it looks like I have ovulated I hope it will help   get to where they need to be   

Hope everyone else has had a good monday xx


----------



## beckalouise

Orrrr thanks clomper it's definitely an emotional rollacoaster this infertility lark  .  Looking at last week of July I think but will take one step at a time. 

Hope those swimmers get moving   for another natural BFP.


----------



## Moxie

Evening all 

Beckalouise, welcome  . Good luck with the FET, hopefully it won't be as stressful on your body as a fresh cycle - I certainly found mine a lot easier.  I read your signature and I'm so sorry for your loss.  Words fail me and all I can do is  . I pray your next treatment is successful for you xx

Clomper, fx for you this month.  And I sympathise with you on the tantrum front. Heath (always seems to be him causing trouble..!) is amazing at tantrums.  He throws himself on the floor and can scream for ages. The silly thing is its often about nothing at all  . Or he wanted a snack/toy, it was delayed in reaching him, and he's still having the tantrum even once I've offered it to him   Good luck at acupuncture tomorrow too.

Penelope, great news on your baseline scan and good luck for the next stage!  Remember to drink plenty of water and rest when you can!  Sorry to hear about your lo diarrhoea  . What has the doc said?  Funnily enough, one of mine has been vomiting for 17 days now and they still say its a bug, but I think he may need referring...  Let me know how you get on and I hope the little one improves very soon  

Bluebell, good luck tomorrow hun, be thinking of you   xx


----------



## beckalouise

Thank you moxie. Noticed you are soon having another scan so sending lots of   and   x


----------



## michaelaeloise

Hi All

i havent been on for a while so thought i would catch up. I am so sorry to hear peoples sad news, this rollercoaster has a lot of downs, i wish you all the luck in the world for your future, life can be cruel.

Glad to hear others are moving on, time seems to fly!! it wont be long for that dreaded 2ww!

Well we had 12 week scan today, everything fine, only one baby which is good! i did have a 'leak' the other day which i can only assume was the amniotic fluid from the sac which never grew, it felt like that anyway. You'd think we'd be able to sit back and relax now wouldnt you, i feel so ungrateful for not really enjoying it so far but you hear and experience so many negative things along the way that its really hard isnt it!! 
Whats everyones opinions on finding out the sex of baby? we didnt do it last time but this time we are considering finding out but not telling anyone just so we know whether we can start selling all DS old stuff or hang onto it xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Beckaloise, welcome! Good luck for your upcoming treatment. I read your signature and like the other ladies was moved by how bittersweet life is. 

Michaelaeloise, great news on 12 week scan but I can totally sympathise with you about still being nervous. Having been through the infertility rollercoaster I don't think you ever completely relax. As for finding out the sex of your bump, I'm all for a surprise as we didn't find out either but I can see the pros with baby number 2/3 and selling DS things would generate some cash to buy for the new arrival. 

Clomper, hope acupuncture goes well this week and fingers crossed it helps you get your bfp!! I had some yesterday after scan and it really helped reduce my stress levels.

Moxie, LO has had diarrhoea for 2 weeks now and I've been to see doctors 4 times during that time and I've had 4 different answers none of them useful. My poor little man now has severe nappy rash and I'm so frustrated with the NHS!! Doctor yesterday has made referral for him to see a pediatrician but I don't know how long that will take. I finally got them to agree to taking a stool sample and health visitor and I have decided to try him on a lactose free milk for a few days to see if helps. I think yesterday I was worrying that now isn't the right time to be going through and IVF cycle but then I guess with a little one there never is a right time. 

Xx


----------



## beckalouise

Thanks Penelope  . How often does your little one go a day and is it very loose? Austin goes up to 4 times a day (always 3 times) and its loose but not watery.  HV reassured us that it's just his diet as his fav food is fruit and as a nurse I tend to agree. Guess he has been eating solids for a while now but it may be diet related. Hope you get to see the paediatrician soon   

Michaelaeloise - we found out sex at 20 week scan, everybody else knew we knew but as my dad didn't want to know we kept it a secret until about 34weeks when he had to go into our newly painted light blue nursery to put the cots together  . We then told everybody so they could getting shopping


----------



## Moxie

Just a quick one from me as I'm pooped this evening and desperately need sleep!

Michaelaeloise, great news on the 12 week scan  . Another milestone reached.  I know what you mean about relaxing though, it's hard to not worry about the next stage whatever it is.  Everything's is going well so far though and try to put all the what ifs to one side...!  We found out the sex of the twins mostly because I was struggling with boys names so thought I ought to know if either was a boy - both were!  I also felt, having been through ivf a few times, that we knew everything about these babies from day dot, even down to seeing a photograph of them as blastocysts, so why have a piece of information that's right there in front of me be withheld and kept secret by the sonographer?!  Sounds silly I know  . I'll find out again now though because we have tonnes of boys stuff and no girls stuff.  Don't know if my funny logic is of any help to you!

Penelope, I can't believe they've only just agreed to take a stool sample, I would have thought that would be the first step, but great that they now will.  Is he well hydrated and eating well?  My two had rotavirus earlier this year and it was 10 days of severe watery diarrhoea with fever and lethargy.  I'll never forget having to do about 20 saturated nappies a day that invariably necessitated a clothing change too because it had leaked every time. My washing machine did overtime and I caught it too so it was just awful!  I can understand how worried you must be after two weeks, that's a long time.  Hopefully you get that referral through very soon, I'm sure they won't leave a baby to go too long with diarrhoea like that without seeing him.  And you're right, I think there would never be a completely perfect time to start tx again with a lo in tow.  It seems like there's always something going on, wether it be teething, illness, growth spurt, etc etc!  But you're there now - day one of stimming     xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Hi everyone.

Hope you are all enjoying the sunshine. 

Just a quickie from me to check when you have your scan Moxie? Is it Mon? Hope you  aren't worrying about it too much and I have everything crossed that your life embie has grown. 

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Aww, thank you Penelope  . Scan is Monday at 09:30. Still no bleeding, but of course I'm worried it'll be a mmc!  Some of us are just destined to worry whatever is happening!  I've even been wondering what my options would be afterwards and whether I would want to put myself through it all again if I miscarry another one...  Anyway, lets be a little optimistic and wait to see what the scan says on Monday  . How's your little boy Penelope? Still got diarrhoea?  Hope he's feeling a little better xx

Hello to everyone else too, hope you're all enjoying the weather and the heat not bothering your lo's too much xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Moxie, I am exactly the same! I always have to plan next step even if everything is going ok. I did it with last cycle and am doing it with this one. In my head I'm working out when we could have another cycle when this one doesn't work!! Think it's its our way of protecting ourselves. 

My little boy is slowly on the mend. Go thinks it was rotavirus and it caused a gut sensitivity which caused the persistent diarrhoea. He still has diarrhoea but the amount of nappies has reduced and he's got his appetite back. Thank you for asking. 

My scan is 9.50 so we'll swap updates after!!!

Xxx


----------



## Moxie

Oh I'm pleased to hear he's on the mend, poor little thing.  When they're still so young it's hard to watch them ill like that for a prolonged time.  At least now he'll start perking up a bit and everything for you should seem a little better.  I know when mine are ill, they cry and become clingy and just aren't themselves.  Everyday seems so much harder than normal.  Once they're their normal chirpy selves again then I start to enjoy my days with them again!  Giggles and cuddles make it all worthwhile  . Good luck at your scan, hopefully you've got lots of lovely follicles growing lots of lovely eggs   xx


----------



## Moxie

Penelope how did it go?  Hope all is ok xx

My scan didn't go well...  As I feared they've said it's a delayed miscarriage (mmc).  Baby hasn't grown much since last scan and there's no heartbeat today  . Can't believe I've lost another one this year.  I'm now considering my options, but I've booked the ERPC for next Wednesday. How rubbish is this?  Years of infertility and operations and now miscarriages.  I'm so unbelievably blessed to have my two little ivf miracles!  I'm seriously wondering now whether or not to call it a day.  Most people (most of you in fact!) will be incredibly happy to have two bubs so I know I was probably greedy to hope for more  . Bye bye little one, love you xx

So sorry for the negative post ladies, I really wish you all the very best. I'll stick around on here though in case we do have another miracle xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Oh Moxie I am so so sorry. I dont know what to say. I really feel for you. I am devastated for you. Life is so cruel sometimes, giving you a miracle and then snatching it away from you. Please dont feel greedy for wanting more children. Its an urge that is out of our control and you shouldnt feel guilty about it. I know I felt guilty for wanting more than 1 but then why shouldnt we. Just because we have fertility issues doesnt mean we cant dream of having more. Dont give up on your dream just yet. Its very early days, the emotions you are feeling are still so raw and it will take time for you to recover from this. See how you feel in a few weeks lovely. 

Sending you big big  

xxxx


----------



## beckalouise

Couldn't say it better than Penelope so just sending more  

Take care x


----------



## Moxie

Thank you Penelope and beckalouise.  Hugs are most welcome   xx

Penelope still thinking of you and hope it went well for you today hun xx


----------



## kdb

Moxie      Please please please don't EVER think you are being greedy, wanting another child. The m/c is in no way a sign that you should be 'satisfied' with what you already have!

As PP says, *don't give up on your dream! *   

Love & hugs


----------



## Moxie

Thank you kdb, that's so sweet of you.  Not sure what my dreams are anymore though, I think that's trouble today.  Feeling a bit worse than yesterday to be honest and really tearful.  I definitely need to let some time pass before I make any more decisions.  What a rough journey we're on, eh?  And I thought I was off it!  Hugs for you too   xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Moxie, how are you today? Just wanted you to know I'm thinking about you. 

Xx


----------



## Moxie

Penelope, that's so kind of you  . I'm feeling a bit better today, thank you.  I think yesterday was when it really sunk in and I really felt I needed some time to be on my own and grieve a bit, but of course I have 16 month old twins so there's no time for that!  I've spent the day with friends in the sun and started making some plans for the next year to give myself things to look forward to, minus a new baby.  It's my birthday on Saturday and DH has Friday off and a surprise day out for the 4 of us so I'm just hoping I don't start bleeding heavily before then - I need it to wait until Sunday at least!  We've also decided to buy a little tree, perhaps a cherry blossom, to remember the two bundles we've lost this year.  I wasn't going to do it after the first, but I feel I need to do something this time.  I'll be ok.  Anyway, you still haven't told us how tx is going for you!  I keep wondering and hoping that stimming is going well for you!  Thinking of you too hun   xx

Hello to everyone else too.  Clomper, how's things going? Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Moxie I'm glad you're feeling a little better today lovely. I think the tree idea is brilliant. I hope you have a lovely birthday with your family. Don't forget we are here if you need a rant or some support. 

Sorry, I didn't mention my treatment as didn't think it was right given what you are going through. I had a scan Mon and they upped my dose and scanned me again today. Got to stay on higher dose til Fri when I have another scan. Responding ok but access to left ovary isn't great so think they are trying to pump up the ones on right just in case. 

Big hugs  

Hi to everyone else. 

Xx


----------



## Moxie

I thought that was the case Penelope!  No need to worry about that though, I'm really glad to hear things are progressing. Come on right ovary  ! Xx


----------



## Clomper

Oh Moxie I am so sorry hun! I have only just seen your sad news.      
Life is so very unfair sometimes. Please dont say you are being greedy wanting more little ones, for many people having children is something they can take for granted, just because we have fertility issues we still have the same rights to want more children to love.
I hope you can feel positive about the future and enjoy your birthday as much as you can this weekend.
I will be thinking of you    

Penelope, sounds like you are doing well hun. Grow follies grow...

xxx


----------



## beckalouise

Just a quick hello and another   for moxie.

Penelope - hope scan goes well tomorrow.

AFM - AF arrived today (3 days late) so guessing should be ok to start next stage on Monday after scan (fingers crossed  ).

Xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Evening all!

Moxie how are you? Happy birthday for tomorrow lovely! 

Beckalouise, my AF was really late. Its ironic isnt it we spend month after month praying AF wont turn up then the one time we need it to arrive its late!!!! Fingers crossed you can get going with the next stage after your scan on Monday. 

Clomper, how are you? Are you in the 2ww? 

My cousin has just announced she is expecting baby #2. I dont really like her or her hubby and when they announced she was pregnant with baby #1 I didnt take it very well as it was an accident and we had just found out we needed IVF. Anyway, I know this may sound really silly but got really upset when I got the text saying she is pregnant again. It brought back all those old ttc feelings from before which I thought had gone. Hubby cant understand why this has upset me and I cant really explain why it has but it has!! 

Hope everyone has a good weekend. 

xxx


----------



## beckalouise

Oh PP think we all get those feelings against people to get pregnant easy. My SIL got pregnant with #1 whilst we were on waiting list and our reaction (quite whilst everybody else was jumping about) caused a big family argument and we didn't see them until after birth, we just meet baby #2 this week and still have those bitter feelings  

How did scan go?


----------



## Moxie

Hello ladies,

Penelope, had a lovely birthday thank you and I bought that tree today.  We got a winter flowering cherry and needless to say I cried in the shop.  And when we got it home.  Etc etc!  Hw did the scan go yesterday?

Clomper, thank you for your lovely words.  I'm glad I found you all here, it really does help having you  

Beckalouise, thank you for hugs  . How's tx going so far?  What stage are you at now?  I understand about your sil, I have one that's a pain too!  She had number 2 just as we started tx, then on a very upsetting OTD of our second failed cycle she asked to be god parents to her new one as consolation  . It still flabbergasts me...

Well, on Friday DH surprised me with a trip out where I got to spend 3 hours flying owls and other birds of prey  all by myself.  It was amazing!  I've had a lifelong passion for owls and I flew 6 different species.  Incredible  . Today we left the boys with mil and went for a pub lunch with amazing rural views and some much needed peace and quiet.  Albeit in the stifling hot sun!  Bought my beautiful new tree too. Just tucking into a cheese board and glass of chilled Pinot Grigio.  I think I deserve it today!

Love to you all xxx


----------



## beckalouise

Moxie - the tree is a lovely idea, glad you have chosen it and had a lovely day with the owls  

I'm back for scan tomorrow to check lining thin and I'm switch off then can start tablets (forget the name) then rescan 8days later to plan ET (eeekkk).

Hope everybody else has been enjoying the lovely weekend

Take care xx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Morning all!

Moxie, Im glad you had a nice day. The owl flying sounds absolutely amazing what a lovely thoughtful gift from hubby. Im not surprised you were teary buying the tree, bless you. Sending you more big hugs lovely   .

Beckalouise, have you got some frosties then? Good luck with the scan tomorrow. Those 8 days will fly by and ET will be here before you know it!! Glad its not just me who has these bitter feelings towards everyone who gets pregnant with ease!!

I have an annoying S.I.L too!! She got jealous when we got pregnant( she always has to have what we have and try to better it!!), despite knowing everything we had gone through to get there, and went and had donor sperm IVF (she is single). Annoyingly, it worked first time and she now has a baby boy too. However, the reality of being a mum has hit her hard as she really thought it would be sitting in coffee shops and socialising!!! 

Hi to everyone else, hope you are all well? 

Scan went ok Fri but they wanted to let the follies grow some more over the weekend. So, Im back in for a scan again tomorrow when hopefully they will give me a day for EC. Im definately feeling more swollen and heavy so praying thats a good sign. \

xx


----------



## beckalouise

Good luck for your scan tomorrow Penelope sounds promising that you will soon be on 2ww   Your SIL sounds a right one what are inlaws like  .

Yes we are lucky to have 4 frosties from our 1st icsi that were grade 2 and frozen on day 2 so will have to hope 1 survives as having eSET.

xx


----------



## Bluebell44

Just a quickie to say so sorry moxie. It really is so cruel why get your hopes up if a natural BFP again to have it snatched away so cruelly. Ill be thinking of you tomorrow. Don't give up on your dream to have another little one. Xxx


----------



## Penelope Pitstop

Just a quickie to say thinking if you today moxie xx


----------



## Moxie

Thank you ladies for your lovely messages.  ERPC done and dusted and went as well as can be expected.  I'll give it a few weeks before we talk about any future plans as I think our heads are a bit all over the place at the moment.  What a crazy roller coaster we're on and I now find myself in the very unexpected position of having to think about contraception...  

Bluebell, I really hope you get your BFP soon and this time it'll be a sticky one  

Penelope, any idea on ec day yet?  

Beckalouise, not long now until ET!  Hope it's all going as planned for you.  

Clomper, hope you're well hun xx


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## Clomper

Moxie, I'm glad it went as well as can be expected today hun. I know you must be feeling rotten but try and spoil yourself with a couple of glasses of wine and maybe a nice spa day or something just for you. Big hugs     
I hope they will be able to give you some answers as to why this has happened so you can go on to have another go.   

Penelope, have you had EC yet hun? I hope you have lots of little eggies   
I also still get the pang of bitterness over some peoples' pregnancy announcements! Especially when they harp on about how it was an accident...  

Beckalouise, hope your scan went ok and you have started your tablets. You should be Pupo soon too then?!!

Well I should have been just starting my period, but for some odd reason( I blame the acupuncture as it has never happened before) I started spotting 8 days early then started my period on saturday, making my usual 30-31 day cycle only 25?!!! I have started seeing a different acupuncturist since then, who is chinese but has been practising traditional chinese medicine in this country for 12 years.
Oh I do hope we have some luck...    

Hi to anyone I have missed xxxx


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## beckalouise

Thanks all, not going quite to plan   had scan Monday and lining was 5mm (they wanted it 4mm) so rescanned today (think just because I work there) and it was 4.6mm so still not ready   wasn't really expecting a delay as fertility problems are DH but they have reassured me its quite common (reassurance hasn't worked mind  ). So back Friday but honestly think it might be more like Monday!!

  moxie, daft thing to say with your little ones but hope you get some rest rest  

Hi to everybody else, Austin screaming for the iPad so must go   (he's an apple yunkie!!) x


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## Penelope Pitstop

Hi all,

Moxie, hope you are ok ( well, as well as can be expected given what what you've been through). I think it's wise to give yourselves some time to deal with what's happened before you start thinking about the next step. 

Beckalouise, sorry to hear things aren't going to plan I hope you're not delayed for too long.

Bluebell how are you?

I had collection yesterday and had the call today to say we have 4 embryos. Don't know when transfer will be yet. 

Xxx


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## beckalouise

Oh exciting Penelope, will they go to day 5 do you think? Either way you will be pupo soon so sending you lots of   and   xx


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## Moxie

Penelope, wow how exciting!   stay strong little embryos and they'll soon be back where they belong (well at least one of them will be anyway...  ). Are you having a SET?  Hope you're feeling physically ok after collection too.  I'll be thinking of you over the next few days xx

Beckalouise, yes, I'm getting some rest as hubby took a couple of days to be with me and them after the operation.  Thankfully!  Good luck at your scan tomorrow xx

Hello to everyone else   xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Sorry I haven't been on here much. Hope everyone is ok?

Moxie how are you?

Clomper, a new cycle brings new hope. Fingers crossed you get that bfp this time.

We had 4 lovely embryos on Sat, all doing really well so ET was scheduled for this afternoon. We've just had a phonecall to say that all 4 have stopped growing ovr the weekend. Totally devastated. We don't have any answers as to why yet. Waiting for  phone call from the clinic. This journey is so hard!!!


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## Moxie

Oh Penelope, I'm so so sorry to hear that  . I really hope they can help explain why all 4 may have failed.  Were they planning a day 5 transfer?  I know my clinic would only take the embies to day 5 if there were a certain number of them (I thought 6 but I could be wrong). Anyway, that doesn't change what's happened and I hope you get some answers.  Stay positive for the future hun... Every cycle is different and the next one will hopefully be better for you.  Hugs from me     xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Thanks Moxie. Yes they were planning a day 5 transfer and I was surprised that they took the risk as there were only 4 but you trust them as they are the experts. I'm not happy as still waiting for phone call from consultant.

Xx


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## Bluebell44

Penelope I'm so sorry sweetie what a kick in the teeth. Try to be strong. Are you able to do another cycle? Xxx


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## beckalouise

Oh Penelope how devastating I'm so sorry   x


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## kdb

PP - huge hugs


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## Clomper

Oh Penelope I am sorry!! You must be so upset! Have you spoken to the consultant now? Have they given you any explanation?    

Moxie, how are you doing hun? 

Beckalouise how are you getting on? Are you stimming now?

I am waiting to ovulate, will be interested to see if my cycle has changed at all after my complete mess of a cycle last month! OH has appointment to give his "deposit" at the beginning of next month, then we should get an appointment through with my gynae, so at least we will be a step closer to starting IVF again if needed.

xxx


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## beckalouise

Hi clomper, yes started HRT last Friday so back tomorrow to check lining I think they said it had to be 10mm for transfer and the average time from starting HRT to transfer was 17 days so have a little bit to go yet I think!   that your cycle is 'normal' this month and you don't need that appointment  

More   for Penelope hope you got the answers you needed from the consultant  

Hi to all xx


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## Reaching for a star

Hi all, I started FET on Tuesday and just wondered if anyone else is going through treatment ATM too? I'm feeling really tired and don't remember being so bad the last times X


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## rooneyb

Hello ladies, this is my first post in this section though I have read a little. I just wanted to say to Penelope pitstop, I feel for you. I was due for a ET on Thursday and all my 4 embryos (FET) didn't survive the thaw. I  wasn't prepared for this at all, and it just shows how fragile the process is. 
My DS is a Oct 2012 baby too!


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## beckalouise

Hi again reaching 

Ronneyb- so sorry to read your post, what day were you embies frozen? Have they given you any clue as to why all 4 didn't survive?  . I too have 4 frosties and have to say I've started the sleepless nights worrying about the thaw  

Hope everybody else is well, my lining was 8.7mm yesterday so aiming for transfers later next week (fingers crossed) xx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Evening all!

Rooneyb, so sorry to hear about your frozen embies. You prepare yourself that there will be some losses but to lose everything was devastating and shocking. You are right, it does go to show how fragile the process is and is a reminder of how lucky we are to have our little ones. I know it is probably too soon but have you decided what you will do? 

Beckalouise, fingers crossed for safe thawing of your embryos and a transfer next week. 

Welcome Reaching. Good luck with your cycle. 

Moxie, how are you doing? Have been thinking of you. 

AFM, we are slowly getting over our upset at the beginning of the week. Our gorgeous little boy is helping us immensely!! We have decided that we will have another cycle but next year some time. 

xxx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Sorry pressed return before finished....

Clomper, how is the new acupuncturist going?

xx


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## Moxie

Hello all,

Penelope, hey hun how are you doing?  Hope you're coping ok.  I totally understand how your little boy can keep you busy and occupied!  That's exactly what's keeping me going these last few weeks too.

Beckalouise, everything crossed for you this coming week!  

Rooneyb, hi!  So sorry to hear about your embies  .  Have you thought about what your plans will be now?

Reaching for a star, hello fellow twin mummy  . There's a couple going through tx at the mo so hopefully you'll find some support here.  Is your FET medicated?  I did one medicated and one without and certainly remember feeling tired on the medicated one... But you now have two toddlers running you ragged to make you feel even more tired so that could be why!  Good luck with your tx xx

Hey Clomper, how are you are?  Where are you in your cycle at the moment?!  I'm still thinking of you and hope you get your natural sticky BFP  

Afm - I'm coming to terms with what's happened but still feel a bit shell shocked.  This year seems very surreal.  We've gone from years of infertility, to life in the first year with twins  , to two surprisingly easy natural pregnancies that have taken up the majority of this year, but both lost to the angels.  We definitely need a break now and won't be trying again this year.  Hubby says never say never, but I'm not sure what else is in store for me and don't want much more heartache to be honest.  I love my boys though and they're getting lots of extra kisses and cuddles at the moment!

Thinking of you all, lots of   xx


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## Reaching for a star

Hey moxie, as I don't know what a non medicated cycle is and I'm taking buserilin I'm gonna say its medicated! Lol. Yeah beccalouise said it could also be that I'm now busy with the twins to so extra tired! How are your twins?? Thank you, I'm actually really nervous and didn't think I'd feel this bad, so support would b good as only me n hubby know this time!! So we haven't told anyone!

Hope everyone else is feeling ok and big hugs xx


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## Moxie

Reaching for a star, hehe, yes a medicated cycle is what you're doing.  The non medicated ('natural') is where you call in on cd1, scan to check lining thickening on day 9/10, do home ovulation test and call in on day of LH surge - embie is then transferred on the appropriate day after LH surge (in my case 7 days later - 2 to allow for natural ovulation nd then 5 because they were day 5 blasts). I was sceptical about the timings, but it worked  . So no drugs whatsoever and your body does the whole thing.  A completely different ivf experience..!  I can imagine how nervous you feel, but have hope that it worked for you before and your body knows what it's doing.  I think it could be good you've not told anyone what you're doing this time and it may alleviate some of the pressure.  That's certainly what we did on the FET that worked - no one knew until a week after the BFP. Really good luck hun, I'll keep everything crossed for you!  And our twins are doing well thanks. Still totally shocked at how my life has been turned upside down, but love them so much it's all worth it!  How are yours?  How are you coping? Xx

Hello everyone else too xx


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## Reaching for a star

Ha ha thanks, I never knew that type of cycle existed! 
I'm not nervous about it when it's gone back its the thawing I'm nervous about most. I didn't think I'd b too bad as like yourself I'm truly blessed to have the twins and they have also changed our life forever and I know don't have the feeling that I will never b a mum coz I am and always will but I seem to want another sooo bad! Thank you for your support hun.

The twins are great, have their own little personalities and are growing so quick! We've just taken the sides off the cots tonight so I'm a right nervous nelly! Lol. Yeah I'm doin ok with them, I've found it was hard then got easier, then hard again and now getting easier! Xx


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## beckalouise

Thanks moxie, ET will be Thursday as long as we survive the thaw  .  Enjoy your break TTC, your DH is right never say never but give yourself time to make that decision and maybe get away for a break even if it is just the weekend, I can't function without a holiday to look forward too   x


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## kdb

Moxie you deserve a break! Taking the rest of the year sounds like a great plan. Look after yourself and best of luck for whatever you decide in the future xoxo

Hi to everyone else, fingers and toes crossed for those cycling and 2ww-ing!


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## traceytbird80

Hi Ladies 

Just wondered if I can join you in need of a bit of support on our next journey.  We had fresh cycle ICSI in 2010 which we were blessed our beauitiful son who is now 2 and half we had FET last year which sadly resulted in miscarrage at 7 weeks.  We went to start treatment beginnning this year however I lost my mum and april and father in law 10 weeks later son been really stressful.  We started FET last month but medication was messed up and had to abandon cycle so just starting new FET today.  All friends around me have either already had there second child or second is on the way really thought I would be happy with one but feel so hurt being around people who can have one after another it just seems not fair just thought I would turn to people in the same boat as me to remind us how lucky we really are to have our son.

Looking forward to getting to know you all more good luck for all you ladies  

Tbird x


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## beckalouise

Welcome Tbird . So sorry to read about your mum and FIL. I lost my mum when I was 9weeks pregnant, she longed to be a gran for ages and it broke my heart to tell her about my pregnancy whilst she was in the last few weeks of life  Hope your DS brings you lots of comfort like mine does .

Wishing you lots of luck for this cycle, lots of use on here feel the way you do re no 2 so hope we can all be a support to each other x


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## traceytbird80

Hi Beckalouise so comforting to know theres people out there in the same boat really felt for you reading your post and what you have been through.  With loosing your mum so early in your preg must have been heartbreakin I find it so hard thar she will not see little one grow up but all I try to think it that she is looking down on us.

tbird x


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## beckalouise

Hi all, how is everybody? Enjoying another nice weekend I hope  

We had ET as planned Thursday, was a little disappointed as 1 embie dropped from 5 cell to 1 and the other 5 to 3 (they were frozen on day 2) so the 3 cell embie is back on board and will just have to wait and see!!  Wish I'd kept a diary for my last cycle now trying to compare but can't remember  .

Take care all x


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## michaelaeloise

Aww good luck Beckalouise, got everything crossed for you! it all goes so quick, im nearly 18 weeks pregnant now, i cant beleive it! x


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## Katiebells

Hey Girls,
Sorry for butting in I just see beckalouise(my old cycle buddy) congratulations I will have everything crossed for you huny xxxx
Hope all you other ladies are doing ok and sending you lots of baby dust xxxxx
I am due for transfer Sunday week if they survive the thaw xxx


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## JW3

Hi,

I don't get chance to post much but have been reading your thread.  Dh & me been ttc naturally for 18 months now with 2 miscarriages last year. I am now in the second week of 2ww and feeling very tired and falling into the trap of over-analysing and wondering whether this could be the time or whether its just the stress of starting on the journey for tx again, brother wife pregnant with a baby that will most likely need an op on birth, full time work etc. would appreciate support.

Kdb - thanks for the tip re the path lab went on Monday and have my results 

J x


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## beckalouise

Thanks Katie & michaelaeloise   Welcome JW3, when is your OTD? Sure we can all be of support for you I've no idea where I would be without FF  

Nothing to report here, I looked back at my last 2ww posts and by this point I had really really sore (.)(.) and I've compared this little embie picture to my other and it's totally different so that's made me a little negative but still trying to stay strong as know its a little early to panic yet  

On a different note Austin is 2 on Sunday   we are having a family trip to the local theatre who are doing a kids puppet show outdoors then weather depending a picnic in the local park. We've also booked tickets for 'in the night garden' live in a few weeks can't wait to see his little face  

Hope everybody else is well, will you been finding out what team you are joining in a few weeks michaelaeloise? x


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## kdb

JW - sending you hugs and +++++++++++

xoxo


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## Clomper

Hi ladies,

Beckalouise, how are you feeling? I remember having very sore (.)(.) during 2ww with Reuben, but then with last natural pregnancy not sore at all right up until miscarriage. All other symptoms but!! So hopefully your little embie is still settling in!!   

Welcome JW3, when is your OTD? I'm sorry about your previous losses. Hope this is your time.

Michaelaeloise, wow 18weeks!!! How are you feeling? Are you looking very pregnant now?

Traceytbird80, welcome. Where are you with your FET? I am assuming you are doing a medicated cycle?

Rooneyb, welcome to you too. I'm sorry your FET didn't go to plan. How very disappointing!

Moxie, hun how are you? I hope you are ok. Penelope, how are you? I hope you are both managing to enjoy the summer with your boys as much as you can!

AFM, I have had another disaster cycle and I still blame acupuncture!! I started spotting at CD22 horrendous pain in ovaries, back, bottom, pelvis and legs!!! It has stopped now, I havent had any more acupuncture for 2 weeks, so I am hoping By the time I have my period and start next cycle I am somewhere near back on track.
Still waiting for appointment with consultant to come in the post...

Hi to anyone I have missed   

Clomper xxx


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## JW3

Thanks everyone  
I have got a positive on a clearblue digital this morning    so we are very much hoping this one sticks. Even though I am only really 4 weeks tomorrow I am going to see GP today to see if I can get booked for an early scan given 2 previous miscarriages, PCOS and fertility history. At least if anything goes wrong this time I will then be able to be referred to the recurrent miscarriage clinic. I have also booked private scan for 31st Aug. Anyone got any other hints or tips for me? Considering going supermarket later and buying more clearblue digital to do every day  maybe just for tomorrow then               Had all my hormones tested recently by GP and all normal so every reason to be positive        

Clomper     I found that acupuncture was no good either. Good luck and I hope you hear about your appointment soon     
Beckalouise     hope you have a nice weekend sounds fun


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## kdb

Oh wow JW I really hope this is the one! Will you have a couple of bHCG blood tests done? Would definitely recommend doing scans privately if the GP route will be to much hassle. Hugs and sticky vibes +++++++


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## Clomper

JW3 Yay!!!!     Congratulations!! I think the early scans are very difficult to get through GP, I would also recommend getting a private one if you need too.  I'm sure everything will be just fine though


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## beckalouise

Morning everybody.

Hugh congratulations JW3, hope you get an early scan arranged  

Thanks clomper - still no symptoms to report here so guess I'll just have to wait it out til OTD.

Take care all x


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## beckalouise

Hi all just popping on to update that I got a BFN today. Guess I knew the embie quality wasn't very good but at least I have another 2 frosties so just have to get DH to agree to spending another £1000 + now!

Hope everybody else well x


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## Katiebells

Beckalouise I am so sorry hun had really hoped that it would work for you and you could be my lucky cycle buddy again. Im sure you can get DH to produce the goodies and that your next fet will be the one, in my thoughts I know this is not easy xxxxx


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## JW3

Beckalouise - so sorry big hugs


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## beckalouise

Thank you, so glad I have a busy 2 year old to keep me chipper   x


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## Clomper

I'm sorry Beckalouise, hope you are ok.


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## traceytbird80

Hi Ladies

Sorry not been on for a while we now have egg tranferred booked for tomorrow all being well.  I remembered when I had my fresh cycle there was lots of advise on extra things to help implantation one was to cut down on caffeine, the drink milk and eat some brazil nuts.  I know it sounds silly but we have to try can anyone think of any other bits of advise they have heard of.

tbirdx


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## Clomper

Hi ladies,

Hope you are all well!
Just wanted to update we have another natural BFP here!!!
The acupuncture just really messed my cycles up, but after 6 weeks without any, got back to normal and now am pregnant!!
Very early days still, so keep fingers crossed this one's a sticky one!     

Clomper xxx


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## beckalouise

Hugest congratulations clomper, lots of sticky vibes coming your way


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## Clomper

Beckalouise, I see you are having another FET, good luck hun.

We are back to TTC naturally again after another MC. Seen my consultant, being tested for diabetes, if negative we will try naturally until April them start another cycle of IVF, if positive at least it can be treated and hopefully we may conceive a take home baby!

Hi to everyone else


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## beckalouise

Oh no clomper I'm so sorry. Take care  .

Decided to stick on the FET tread as all quite on here but hope anybody reading is well x


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## Kuki2010

Merry Christmas Ladies, have a fantastic Christmas.Love to you all. Kukixx


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## Penelope Pitstop

Hi,
Haven't been on here since my last Ivf cycle in Jun/Jul. Just waiting to start down regging for our next cycle and was wondering if anyone is also having treatment at the monent/due start soon? 

Xxx


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