# Taking sabbatical or quitting your job in order to TTC



## Ajbpepsi

Hi everyone,

I would like to know if anyone else has decided to give up work in order To try to conceive? I would like to hear how you did it, your stories, your thoughts, feelings.......maybe it can help me.

After 2.5 years trying and 3 x iui's, with 1 miscarriage, I am now thinking Need to dedicate time to TTC. I work in a stressful sales job as an account manager. I travel mostly in Europe a least twice a month if not more sometimes.  I work from home which of course does help.  But trying to organise iui appointments and do my job is almost impossible. Ultimately, managing the fertility treatment itself is stressful as well as my sales job with targets/quotas to meet etc. and then of course, I often miss a cycle of treatment as I have to travel for work, that really sucks a lot.....then I resent my job for that too.....

I got pregnant in February 2013 and I think the reason I got pregnant was because I was Ill and had to take off 8 days from work to get better. I rested, I relaxed, and my body totally de-toxed. We then had the iui and I think it took because my body was in a state of normality for once in its life.

Giving up my job is the hardest thing ever. I actually like my job a lot, yes it is stressful, but I love the buzz of sales and the mixture of travel and working from home. I have worked here 13 years. It's all I know. But I can't focus on the job and my personal goals at the same time, it just doesn't seem to work.  I feel bitter that I would have to give up my job for this, when others get pregnant so fast and keep their job, maternity leave and manage to go back. It sucks. Have to give it up before the maternity leave would even start!

So today I approached my boss and asked how I could take an absence of leave for a year, he was really good and he supported me, of course it's just an idea right now, and I have no idea how all this can work till I talk to the HR department.

I Know there is a danger to give up with just one aim then in life, to conceive.....but I would also be focusing on my health, exercise, relaxing, learning a language, maybe finding some time to write a fiction book I always dreamed of......and spending time with my husband. Maybe with just one of us in a stressful job is more manageable than two of us in a stressful job......

I just wondered if anyone else had done something similar. I would love to hear any stories or experiences....how you went about it....if you felt better....if it gave you the time you needed.....or anything like this.....

Thank you! 

AJ x


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## lollipops

I gave up my job   




I had lots of clomid cycles. one op to open my tubes then 3 cycles of treatment another tubal op and was no where close to a pregnancy. 


With each cycle of treatment I found returning to work became harder and harder ( I worked with children ) and my boss was becoming more and more frustrated with the clinic appointments and time off I needed. 


We had decided to have one last go at IVF and felt that me giving up my job would increase our chances. It was risky but I felt I needed to dedicate time to myself and take myself out of my stressful job.


My gamble paid off. 


I do believe giving up my job helped our final treatment, I was far more relaxed, I could go to appointments without upsetting work or worrying about work. I made sure I ate well, got lots of sleep etc.


Giving up a job for the chance of fertility working isn't a sure fire way for it to work. But I do believe it helped me conceive, I was noticeably more relaxed during my final treatment and felt more positive because of this.


Good luck with whatever you decide to do x


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## yogabunny

I went self employed 8 months ago when IVF treatment kicked off, I am taking on project work, so there is a set period of time when I am working, I can control when I work to a certain extent and can work from home a lot. It has made it much easier for me, like lollipops I am more relaxed, I can fit in treatment appointments and have more time to eat well and keep active. 

For some a great job can be a perfect distraction from all consuming TTC but my last job had become very stressful, no-one was happy there, not a good place to be, I was ready to work for myself - I would have left anyway, IVF just gave me another reason to go. 

I have also started some personal projects, I volunteer at the national trust once a week something very different and i love it, I have not yet started my blog! but my spanish is getting some practise. I have the time to exercise and to cook. We were both very busy with work and  me having more time has definitely allowed us to be more supportive of each other, we feel closer because of it ...  I do have to make a big effort to be social as I miss that part of my working day. I am still getting used to my new routine and I feel like there is more I could do to make the most out of it! 

For me it has been the right decision, the positive outweigh the negative, and if you can take a year out, with some other goals for the year, that sounds good.


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## yogabunny

lots of luck AJ xx


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## A123

I didn't give up my job but I had 6 weeks off work due to accumulated holiday... I cannot believe that we fell pregnant (naturally) in this time. Over a year earlier, after lots of tests that took ages on waiting lists ect. I was told that to concieve would be very challenging. We were ready for treatment and with this time off we became pregnant. 

It is not a magic cure and I wouldn't take time off to just try to become pregnant, I would take the time off for you, to recover, mentally and physically and focus on healing yourself before you perhaps have treatment later on, easier said than done I am completely aware, but IF is so hard to live with, it puts a massive strain on our bodies and can change who we are and how we think. I really hope if you take time out that you enjoy it, relax and that you feel healed after everything you have been through.

Best of luck to you xx


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## Ajbpepsi

Hi Lollipops, Yoga bunny and A123,

Thank you for sharing your stories with me. It's really good to know that it helped all of you too. I was feeling a bit like I must be the only one on the planet to be considering this so it has been really helpful for me. I think you are all right that just by having some time out it gives your body the chance to relax a bit, but you are also right it's good to have other things to do and not just focus on the TTC bit. I really think I am ready for this next step, we have been thinking about this for so long now......now I have to talk to HR tomorrow about how we can make this work.....lets see what happens. But whatever happens, I need this time out, so one way or another I need to find a solution for this.....we only live one life, so it's important to make the most of it....

I hope everything goes well for your pregnancies A123 and Lollipops! And yoga bunny I wish you lots of luck as well, it's sounds like you have got lots of positive things going on to keep you busy and relaxed. You have all inspired me already....wishing you all much luck!

AJ xx


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