# Bad day at the office



## Yamoona (Nov 7, 2005)

Hi girls, happy valentines day to you all. Sorry I have not been around much but not had much to say and have been a bit busy with the clinic work (about time).

Today I had my office job hat on and as some of you know I work for a children's charity. We have developed coping skills to deal with most of the horrid things we have to deal with but today one little boy just broke my heart. He used to live round the corner from me and I didn't realise who he was until today, he does not know me but I have watched him over the years as I used to walk past his flat everyday and he would be playing outside. He has not had a good first 5 years of his life and today he was screaming at the top of his voice how he wanted to give up on life because it had given up on him and everyone left him. He is 5!! He was being managed by professionals but this happened near to where my colleague and I were sitting (this was unavoidable). I just wanted to sweep him up and show him life could be better and comfort him, it was horrid. There are some rubbish parents out there and 95% of the time I can deal with this and our infertility but every now and then one gets to you. I am so glad he is getting support and I pray his life gets better. Not looking for a response just wanted to write it down and is shock me up and also brought back my own childhood experiences.

Yamoona
x


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## emcee (Apr 3, 2005)

Oh Yamoona  

I'm so sorry this poor little boy has had to go through this, and sorry it has touched some raw nerves with you.

I think you are amazing for doing the work that you do...

Lots of love to you honey

Emcee xxx


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## Pol (Mar 9, 2007)

Hi Yamoona

There really are some terrible things that happen to children.  I'm afraid I'm a coward and just try to insulate myself as much as possible from even thinking about bad / terrible parents let alone actively working in an environment where I'm trying to bring so help to the children affected.  I just couldn't do it.  I think you're so brave!  

Jx


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## Megan10 (Jul 16, 2004)

Oh Yamoona honey I want to give you a big hug, 

You are an amazing woman. To have had a tough childhood yourself and find the strength to work to help children as someone who really understands shows such courage. 

Now add the fact that you can't have the children you long for yourself and your job takes on a whole new dimension.
I am sorry for you and for that little boy. Hope today is kinder to you both. 
Love MeganXXX
PS fab to hear that the clinic work is going well.


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## Myownangel (Aug 24, 2005)

Yamoona   I don't have much I can say about  it. The world needs healing, but we can't do it all. I guess just doing your job you are helping to make things better for a lot of people. Sorry that little lad upset you - but it shows you have a heart - and a big one at that. 
Bernie xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Yamoona;   I know how horrible this is as I see a lot of this in my job too ..it is heartbreaking some days as much as you try and stay distanced from it; I am finding more and more I want to take them home to take care of them - one thing that makes me really angry is when perfectly intelligent parents start using their children as pawns when they are splitting up - starting to make all sorts of allegations that are untrue just so that they get the upper hand but it totally screws up the poor kids... 

It is sad that social services get blamed for everything as unfortunately they have limited resources due to government funding; most social workers teams are understaffed and this puts an enormous amount of stress onto staff as they know the effect it will have if they cannot cover all the cases but there is physically only so much they can do in a day and when they are so overstretched is it any wonder that mistakes are made!

There seem to be a lot more people referring themselves to social services as they just want 'their kids sorted out' when you look at the cases it is just normal parenting that these people just cannot be bothered to do themselves and they blame everyone but themselves - this is not what social services are there for; it is supposed to be for the children that are at risk of harm or neglect -not for children being naughty because their parents cannot be bothered to lay down rules and teach their children respect! but these parents are very good at shouting very loud, and threatening this that and the other grr  

Social workers are often so stacked out with going to court and their workloads that they cannot go on training that would be really beneficial to them..so until the government put more money into social care of adults and children there will always be problems and unfortunately it will always be the most vulnerable that end up suffering. 

It is the same in the NHS; when my Mum worked as a senior nurse she would say that the ward could not cope with any more patients as they were understaffed, these were critical patients that required a lot of care but they just used to send them to the ward anyway - my Mum decided to quit after they did this to her for the millionth time and someone died as they were not able to give them the care they needed - so they lost a valuable well trained member of staff as well as losing a patient needlessly.. 

Here I steppeth off my soap box and endeth this rant     
Cat x


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## Yamoona (Nov 7, 2005)

Thank you so much for all your replies. It is such a sad thing when a parent abandons a child and then wonders why they behave so badly. I'm afraid it has just been one of those weeks when all the nasty cases have landed on my desk. My colleague and I live in the same town as many of the children and so see how their parents really behave away from the professionals eyes, many know how to play the game and the system. All we can do is watch, listen, be nice and pray things get better for them. All the play therapists where I work do such a fantastic job, I know they make a difference and that is what keeps me there. Tomorrow I will have my reflexologist hat back on and that gives me such a great sense of achievement that I know I will feel better. Thanks again.

xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

You do a great job hunny..


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## emcee (Apr 3, 2005)

Ditto... you do, and you are loving, lovable and amazing. Never let go of that fact!
Much love to you  
Emcee xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ahhh     hunny I feel all squidgy now


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## jq (Nov 14, 2006)

Hi Yamoona,

Thank goodness that there are people like you to try and make a difference to children who do not have the life they deserve. I hope things work out for this little boy. I also hope that the coping strategies you mention include the staff getting the support they need to do the job.

Hope things are a little easier for you this week.

(Lots of hope there!)

LOL 

Jq xxx


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