# Single women board



## Anthony Reid (Jan 1, 2002)

This board has been created on a trial basis.

Regards,
Tony
x


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## Roo67 (Feb 12, 2007)

Thanks Tony,  

Hope everyone can find us a bit easier now .

Roo xx


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## Mazzzz (Mar 4, 2007)

Excellent - thanks!
Maz x


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## dottiep (Nov 20, 2007)

Great - our own home!

Dx


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

That is good news.  Thanks for sorting out this board.  

Is the idea that those currently undergoing treatment use this one and the other one stays as a general singles board?

Felix xx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Thanks so much Tony 
L x


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## Anthony Reid (Jan 1, 2002)

Felix42 said:


> That is good news. Thanks for sorting out this board.
> 
> Is the idea that those currently undergoing treatment use this one and the other one stays as a general singles board?
> 
> Felix xx


A bit of both I guess


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

OOOH - thanks so much Tony.
Hopefully we'll be found a bit easier now.

I wondered that Felix. I think some of the girls who have got their pals/bubs might feel uncomfortable posting on here. 

Seems a shame to split us.

Any ideas anyone?


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Thanks Tony....

Re Felix and Emma's comments - can we not just call it Single Women sub board - ie delete 'going through tx' from the board title?

Then we could split out the threads inside the board so that there was one specifically for those going through treatment vs a more general chit chat one for anyone if we wanted to....or if that just got too confusing, then we could continue to chat as one group but without anyone feeling excluded by the name of the board...

Personally I don't mind at all if we mix up those going through tx with those who have been there and succeeded (the positive stories are great to hear) but since I guess we sort of have different questions/issues etc to discuss, they might naturally fall into separate threads over time....

Just my thoughts, but great to have our own space!

Laura
x


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## ♥Jovial♥ (Feb 25, 2007)

Thanks for the board Tony!

I think this should be a new home for all of us, regardless of where we are at, everyone should be welcome.  There are issues surrounding being single at all stages, thinking about it, ttc, c/w bump and beyond! Hope i'm not speaking out of turn but would be a shame for us to split due to circumstances, we are all reaching for the same dream   

With a board we can get more discussions going, I was getting really lost on the one thread and always worried I was missing someone out or forgetting what I'd read/by who by the time I got to the end of the post  



x x x


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Completely agree Jovigirl.  The thing that confused me at first was that it said Single Women undergoing tx, but now it just says Single Women (thanks Tony!).

I'm sure lots more people will find us and enjoy this lovely group as much as I do.

Felix xx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

I shall be a full and most active member as soon as I can get my head together!


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## ♥Jovial♥ (Feb 25, 2007)

Oooh I hadn't noticed the name change!  Yay!

Love to all x


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Thanks for the name change Tony - this should work for us all now  

And Emma - you're always welcome, but not because you're officially single again - here's hoping this is a just a blip on NM's part and he sees sense soon. And if not, then it is most definitely his loss....hope you're doing OK tonight - try and get a good night's sleep (easier said than done I know..) 


Laura
x


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

PS Tony - could you also move the Single girls meet up thread into the new Single Women sub board?

Thanks!
Laura


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## dottiep (Nov 20, 2007)

Just to add my agreement that it's good to keep it all together - I find it quite positive to read of other people's journey wherever they are.

Dx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Happy birthday Mazz
L x


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## Mazzzz (Mar 4, 2007)

Just popped on and seen all the lovely birthday messages - thank you everybody!! And thanks for the lovely balloons L! I had a great day - got a smiley face first thing (basting tomorrow) and then my Year 7 French class sang Happy Birthday to me, it was so cute!

Maz xxx


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Mazz so pleased for you- hope the basting went well and you get the perfect present!!
L x


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Maz, so pleased to hear you had a good birthday. I'm basting tomorrow too after late night LH last night and Pregnyl this am. 

We can 'enjoy' the 2WW together!

Felix xx


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## dottiep (Nov 20, 2007)

Felix- wishing you buckets of luck for tomorrow.

Dx


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## Mazzzz (Mar 4, 2007)

Hope it went well today Felix - welcome to the Xmas 2WW!

Maz xx


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## Roo67 (Feb 12, 2007)

Felix and Mazzz - hope the bastings went well, welcome to the 2ww
Mines now over halfway - the worst part is still to come !

Roo xx


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Thank you. Yes I'm now officially on the 2WW and I'm feeling really excited this time!

Hope that feeling manages to stick with me. The clinic said test on the morning of the 14th day this time - it was a nurse on loan from another clinic so I suspect they have different protocols there. So I'm going to do just that and because I'll be at parents where I'll not be able to shop in bulk for HPTs, I will be able to stick to it. 
How is your wait going Roo? Ok I hope. When do you test?

My iui was an awkward affair again today - seems I have a short as well as a bendy cervix but I'm more confident that they did finally get it in this time!

Hope yours went well Maz?

Well, off to lie on the couch and read now having spent the afternoon being ribbed by some colleagues about still being single at a Xmas do. If only they knew what I'd been up to!!

Wishing everyone a chilled evening and lots of 
Felix xx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

All the best Felix and everyone else on their 2ww.  So can't wait til I reach that stage.  Seem to be going through blood tests etc for ever!  Anyone had an HSG?  I'm waiting for an appointment and wanted to ask what's it like?  My consultant is waiting on those results before I continue onwards.  I just feel extremely frustrated with waiting for hospital to sort it's life out!  Ah well - back to the house work!
Take care everyone!  And keep smiling 
Rachel xx


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Felix - glad it went well at basting. Hope that excited feeling stays!

And Maz too...fingers crossed for you both.

Roo - halfway through already - not long now!

Good luck to you all    

Rachel - have PM'd you re the HSG - I had one yesterday....

Laura
x


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Thanks Laura. How was the HSG? Hope you got on ok and all the traveling you had to do afterwards was fine. 

Felix xx


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Yes, HSG was all good - pretty uncomfortable (but I was expecting that as my smear tests are always quite unpleasant - I have a difficult to get to cervix apparently!) but not too painful and all over quickly....
No problems with my tubes so I'm good to go in January!

Laura
x


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## kylecat (Oct 18, 2007)

Hey Laura - pleased to hear that all went well and you are ready to go in january - I expect I won't start DIUI until march so you'll be a couple of months ahead of me!!  Katiex


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Yes, am glad to have the hycosy out of the way - wasn't looking forward to it...but as often with these things, the thought of it was worse than the reality  

Now just have to hope I can pick up my LH surge at the right time. First month I tried was October and it was day 14 of my cycle. Then in November I didn't pick it up at all but started testing from day 10 so think I missed it. This month I picked up surge at 9am this morning (which is day  but then nothing when I tested again at 2pm - not sure if this is normal or not for it to disappear again so quickly?

Anyway, also seems quite early to get it on day 8 and wondering if that has anything to do with the hycosy yesterday...anyone got any experience of this?

Quite concerned about spending nearly £1000 on the unmedicated IUI and then not even getting it at the right time of the month. But I'll give it one go in January without any scans/meds and see how I get on. If it feels like the timing might be off, then I think I'll consider the scans/medicated approach in Feb - don't want to waste hard earned £££s unnecessarily.

Looking forward to enjoying Christmas now that all the tests are done and dusted!
Laura
x


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## some1 (May 13, 2006)

Hello Laura

I have never done an ov test as early as day 8, but I have often had a day or so of ewcm around then, which then disappears and returns around day 10/11 and coincides with positive OPK and raise in temperatures.

Have you read Taking Charge of your Fertility by Toni Weschler (sp?) - it is really good (it is about naturally tracking your fertility using various different signs) and she talks about your body sometimes having an early try at ovulation, but not quite getting there, and then getting successful ovulation a few days later.  

Some1
xx


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## Mazzzz (Mar 4, 2007)

Laura, which OPK are you using? I can recommend the Clearblue Digital - expensive but they seem to be very accurate and also the most easy to read - it's either a smiley face or a blank circle. About £22 but as you say when you are spending a grand on treatment it's probably worth it.

Rachel - welcome to the thread   We're having a meet on Jan 26th in London if you fancy coming along?

Maz xx


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

I would love to  - it will be nice talking to like minded people, who are going through an emotional journey together!  Where and when?  Will try and make sure I'm available, book flights and accommodation!  Would be good to meet you all and thank you for making me feel welcome on this site!  

Good luck to everyone - on their 2WW's and those just about to go through IUI or similar.  

Take care

Rachel x   all round!


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Rachel - the meet is at Kettners (29 Romilly Street) in Soho at 12.30pm on 26th Jan
Here's a link to that thread:
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=121473.15

(I did ask Tony to move it to our Single Women thread but he hasn't had a chance yet I don't think)

Great that you can make it! I've lost count, but we must be up to at least 12 or 13 of us now....

Maz - yes those are the ones I'm using. Got the smily face on day 8 this cycle (yesterday) which is really early I think and has quite confused me. Have also bought a load of cheaper tests from the net so will start to use those and only use the Clearblue when I think I've got a positive on the other sticks...so I can test more than once a day without spending a fortune on smily faces!

some1 - I'll get hold of that book and have a read through, sounds like it could be quite helpful. Will keep testing for a few days this cycle too and see if I get another positive - then I'll know if it's that early try thing or not. Didn't have any other signs this month, but then again had the hycosy on Fri so was hard to tell what was going on down there!

Wish I'd been tracking my cycles a bit longer. Only did Oct (smily face on day 14), Nov (never got smily face, started testing day 10 and went to day 17) and Dec (smily face day  - so quite hard to see any sort of pattern and I want to start with first UIU in Jan. Just a bit worried I'll be spending lots on the treatment and not getting the timing right. Wondering if perhaps I should go with the scans/medicated approach after all. So many decisions 

Thanks for your thoughts though and good luck to you both on your 2WW

Laura
x


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## Roo67 (Feb 12, 2007)

Hi Rachel,

Would be great if you can make the meet in january,
heres the link
[http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/...alike Laura - our posts must have crossed ;D


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Hi Roo
I'm up in Scotland at the mo - spend my time between here and Plymouth (the job).  Am with a Plymouth clinic at the mo, but looking to transfer up this way - anyone know of any good welcoming clinics in Scotland - give me a shout!

Will try and make it for the 26th- should be good.

Take care
Rachel x


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Hi there everyone. Is it ok to join in? I'm 36, single (divorcing), and have had two rounds of fertility tests at the Lister, ahead of making a decision to go ahead with anonymous sperm donor, or known donor. I would so love to be part of a community, as I'm unsure about everything, and feeling a bit isolated. 

I've also put this post on Single Women part 7. It's on page 18! Not sure quite which board I should be on.


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Hi there Zoopy and welcome.  

You're in the right place and it really doesn't matter where you want to post as we all tend to flit between all the threads depending on what's going on.  Probably the main thread at the moment is still the Calling Single Women one as that is the one that we used to use before we had a whole new dedicated home as Single Women.

Sorry to hear about your impending divorce but you're clearly being very positive and proactive about your dreams if you're deciding on next steps including possibly anonymous or known donor sperm.

This is a great community and we're even having a meet up soon - see separate thread under the Single Women board.

Look forward to getting to know you and 'enjoying' this roller coaster treatment ride!

Felix xx


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Thank you Felix. Doesn't it feel great to be connected?

I'd love to join in. Thank you for the kind words. I suppose it's true that I'm being pro-active. I've been separated for two years (we were together for 10), and two potential relationships since then haven't developed. I can't bare the thought that I may not have a child, and so I'm now taking matters in my own hands. I think!

In May and November this year, in a bid to understand my own fertility, I had five tests. Most recent results are FSH: 6.8 (six months earlier it was 3.1); Inhibin B: 15; LH: 5.2; AMH: 0.8 (1.5 six months earlier) and E2: 124. These last results haven't been explained by a consultant yet, but to me seem to indicate quite a rapid decline. Inhibin B looks especially worrying. Do you know how these figs compare? Is there somewhere on the site that I should post them for feedback?

Also, as a single woman I am in a potentially fortunate position. I have a gay friend who is interested in co-parenting. I think I feel positive about this, as opposed to unknown donor, but I have read this morning that all 'donor' sperm administered through a clinic has to be quarantined for six months. That six months could make a massive difference, given the already quite big change in my figs. 

I don't really understand all the figures. Can anyone give any advice? Does anyone know anyone who is going through this with a known donor or co-parent?

Many, many thanks

Z


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Zoopy, I think the Peer Support thread in the main section of FF might be a good start on the test results you've had.  I don't personally know much about it all except FSH and 6.8 is still a good result.  I've heard too that it can fluctuate a good deal so I'm sure that's not to worry about.  JJ1 on this board is good on test results and she is also using a known donor.  I think she might be away at the moment though.  On the quarantine point, clinics do insist on the 6 months so the sooner you can arrange that the better.  Have you read the 'Knock Yourself Up' book yet?  It's a horrible title but a very good, funny and informative read and says a lot on the pros and cons of known vs anonymous vs identity release donors.  Worth a read anyway.

Hope that helps and sorry I couldn't assist on the test results.  There are lots of very knowledgeable women on here though and I'm sure you'll get some good info.  In the meantime though, the best thing to remind yourself is that you're being proactive and at 36 should have time enough to get that much wanted BFP!!

Felix xx


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Thank you Felix, and goodness, if I'm not mistaken, you're testing tomorrow. My very best wishes to you for that. Fingers crossed. x


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Anytime and thanks for the crossed fingers!!
Look forward to chatting again and maybe even meeting you on the 26th if you can make it....
Felix xx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Welcome Zoopy


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Thank you! It's lovely to be meeting people. I'm reading the signatures to learn a little more about people. Gosh, there have been all kinds of journeys. Lots of difficult, sad experiences, but some good ones too. 

Is it ok to ask questions, and share thoughts, on wider issues around this journey? I'm struggling a bit with how to deal with potential new relationships if I decide to go through with trying to conceive on my own. It feels like the appropriate option is to not engage at all in possible new relationships, so as not to blur things, and to keep my focus absolutely on trying for a baby. What have others done? And is that an ok question to ask?


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## Mazzzz (Mar 4, 2007)

Welcome Zoopy and bring on the questions! This is a good place to air your thoughts and get some outside perspectives on pretty much anything to do with 'the journey' - I've found it so helpful and the girls on here are lovely.

I think your question is about putting your life on hold - I had a similar dilemma a few months ago re. applying for new jobs whilst trying to conceive (ttc) - so I would give the advice I got myself (from girls on here who were further down the ttc route) and say not to put your life on hold if that feels like the right thing to do. I also put stopped dating etc when I started treatment but after 4 failed IUIs I have decided to carry on with all three - looking for a new job, looking for a partner, and having IUI hoping to get pregnant. My hope is that with three balls up in the air at least one of them has got to come down soon! And maybe more than one, who knows. Anyway, at the end of the day there's no wrong or right, it's what you feel comfortable with. Good luck with what you decide to do.

Maz xx


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Have to say Maz - I'm with you on the not putting anything on hold anymore. I spent years doing so whilst I went through that blasted adoption fiasco. I remember working every xmas so the next year I could justify having the time off with my child. I didn't do anything to progress at work, and I've stayed in my awful crappy hometown so I was always near my parents for support.

They were all things done with the best of intentions but no more putting things on hold for me!

Ask away Zoopy  . Its very tough to find people to disucc these things with - why the single boards are so important for us.

xx


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## ♥Jovial♥ (Feb 25, 2007)

Zoopy welcome to our world hun    You'll get amazing support and information from here, everyone is great.  You ask away anything you want, its great to be able to share things and no-one understands more than the girls here.

Love to all  

xxx


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Thank you soo much, all of you. I feel quite tearful I'm so relieved to have someone to talk to. I feel all kinds of things. I'm juggling so much at the moment, and it feels like the one thing I have to focus on is motherhood. That makes it sound as though it's something I feel obliged to do - it's not. I do want to do it. I'm just acutely aware right now, at Christmas time, that I'm nervous and upset about it too. I hope it's ok to admit that.

I'm dealing with a drawn out divorce (for 10 years, until I reluctantly left him in 2005, he was The One), a recently ended six-month relationship (he really might have been The One, or at least The Next One, until he left me), a highly stressful job that's exhausting me physically and mentally but would pay for treatment, and the immense sadness that my baby isn't going to arrive with me the way I thought he / she might, in a happy marriage. In fact, after the last two sets of results, it seems that my baby might not arrive with me at all. 

I do know that I want to have a child. If I'm honest, my heart is still longing for a child in a relationship, but my head is saying I have to try now. I have to get on with it, because I've already been told by the consultant at the Lister that I only have a low chance, and not to hang about. I pushed it out by six months already, because I really cared about this new man. Now, my gay friend, desperate to be a dad, has offered to co-parent. This does have many benefits, for the child, for me and for him too, but there's a lot to think about with that. His sperm would have to be quarantined for six months, and I'm nervous of the wait. I'm nervous that he'll change his mind. I'm even more terrified, if I'm honest, of going through the process absolutely alone, and being a single mum. Can I do it? Am I strong enough, good enough, financially secure enough? 

I'm also pretty terrified of being incredibly lonely on the journey. I have good friends and family (family not near). But, you know, I'm 36 and I've only been single, properly single with no dating, for the grand total of 10 months or so since I was 16. Cripes! I've never worked that out before. Blimey, it's true. 10 months! And here I am, getting ready to do such an immensely important, monumental, emotional, amazing, terrifying thing, all on my own. I've barely changed a lightbulb on my own. I don't like how that makes me sound, but hey, I need to be honest!

Two weeks ago I told my estranged husband that i'm very likely to be trying for a baby on my own in the new year, and he cried. I told the ex-boyfriend, he said it 'knocked the wind out of his sails', and two weeks later he left me. That's nearly a month ago.

I have to make a decision, and I've set myself a deadline of January. I feel like I can't let heartbreak and fear get in the way of my chance to be a mum. But the truth is I am heartbroken and frightened, for all the above reasons. And a clock is ticking. I can't miss my chance. I can't hold the thought that I might never meet my own child. It makes me so unbearably sad. 

Does this sound familiar to anyone? Is this what ttc as a single woman is about? I'm not really sure where to start, and I guess what I'm already feeling is the absence of someone else, a partner, to talk about it with, to support each other and share worries. Or even share excitment too. 
Zoopy


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## dottiep (Nov 20, 2007)

Hi Zoopy,

Welcome! 
I can really identify with what's going through your head.  It's such a hard decision to embark on this journey alone even when you know in your heart of hearts a child is what you want so much.  I spent 2 years working myself up to taking the plunge & had my first donor IUI in Nov.  I was scared s$%*less and still am but am really determined to hold my own baby one day (soon given my age!!)
None of us expected to be here alone contempating this but we must all be strong womento have got here.  On the days when I don;t feel quite so strong (Xmas has been tough), I find the site really helps & the girls have so much experience & knowledge.
Anyway, we're all here if you need us.

Take care
Dottie
x


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

Hi Zoopy,

Totally know where you're coming from.  

I always thought that I'd have children within a marriage, but it hasn't happened like that, some how end up with the wrong type of guy.  I was diagnosed with multiple pulmonary emboli last year - which really did give me the wake up call I needed.  I reached the soul searching decision to embark on the route of having a baby because I felt that I could live without having been married, but to have never been a mum would break my heart.  I've got to at least try.

I wish you all the best on your journey, we're all here to laugh with and cry with.

Take care

Rachel x


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Zoopy - I think the feelings you describe are very common and would resonate with all of us in one way or another. It's not an easy decision to be sure and there aren't many of us who actively want to do this alone rather than in a long term relationship/marriage...

My personal situation is a bit different to yours in that I've been single for a long time - I had one long relationship in my early-mid twenties and nothing meaningful since (now nearly 38...) - so I've had perhaps a lot longer to come to terms with being on my own.  I'm also fiercely independent anyway (although I'm also pretty bad at lightbulb changing or anything else vaguely DIY related I have to say  ) - in part I think due to being eldest of 3 girls and my father dying when I was only 13 - I'm not anti men, don't get me wrong, but I think I just realised quite early on that you have to be able to make your own way in this world as there are no guarantees. I'd love to have a partner to have a child with, but I haven't met the right person and time is running out - and I know that I will always regret not having a child/children if I don't go ahead and do it. 

My thought process has been relatively long overall but I made the final decision to go ahead quite quickly. Been thinking about having a baby on my own for around 4 or 5 years, but decided in late August that I would go ahead and hope to have first IUI in about 2 weeks time. There wasn't one thing which helped me make the final decision, it was more a culmination of factors. I did the maths and realised I could afford it (although like you it means I have to stay in a stressful job when I'd really rather do something else/cut down to 4 days a week), talked to family and friends and realised that they would be very supportive, read up on the subject (there are several books - look on Amazon for the Mikki Morrisette book, also Jane Mattes, and the one Felix mentions somewhere - Knock Yourself up) to make sure I'd thought of all the angles. Most of the time I'm excited about it. But of course there are the days where I find myself thinking I must be completely insane to be doing this by myself. I have a niece and nephew who are 3 and 1, and after a weekend babysitting them I come home and wonder if I'm crazy to think I could cope alone - afterall one weekend is fine, but every day with no one else to help out...but then I remind myself that I have friends and family to help and that lots of women cope on their own just fine, why shouldn't I?

I've told my family (my two sisters and my mum) and quite a few friends what I am doing and they have been fantastically supportive and willing to let me go on and on about it - which has helped me work through lots of the issues in my own mind. I deliberately picked friends who I thought would be supportive but I've been pleasantly surprised by just how great they have been - so perhaps you could try talking to a close friend or two?

And of course all of us are here to 'talk' any time - we're all going through the same thing and I've found this site invaluable since I found it a few months ago. So do feel free to bombard us with questions or just vent when you need to  

At the end of the day, it's a very personal decision and we all reach it in our own time and by our own path. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to make a decision - give yourself time to feel comfortable with things. I know it's easy to say when you feel that time is running out, but I think you'll know when you're ready....

Good luck!
Laura
x


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## Damelottie (Jul 26, 2005)

Hi Zoopy

Yes, I agree with the others that your describing the thoughts and feelings we've had - and are still having in my case. I joined this site in 2005 when I started my IUI's. The at the beginning of the year I met somebody who I thought was The One. Sadly he ended our relationship 2 weeks ago so I'm back at the beginning of all the thought processes again.

I think there is almost a period of grief to go through in some respects. Acknowledging that you might not be going to have a family in the way you alway thought - and in my case the way I still really really want.

I'm glad you found us.

Emma x


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## winky77 (Nov 27, 2007)

Hi there Zoopy,

you are in the right place to share these thoughts.....just echoing what Laura, Rachel and Dottie have said....everything you are going through will have been gone through by many of us on here....that's what is so refreshing.....to realise these thoughts, preoccupations, even obsessions sometimes.....it's all part of the journey.   If you get any of the books mentioned a lot of the writers talk about the experience of coming to terms with TTC on your own.  It's often described as an actual grieving for the loss of the dream that most of us have .....i.e. having children as part of a loving relationship.  At the same time there is also an incredible pride and strength to be drawn from the fact that we can choose to do this.  We don't have to be victims of circumstance or badly timed relationships or to compromise ourselves in 'not quite right' relationships just in order to have a family.  And I also think it is worth thinking ahead to the future. Making the choice to TTC on your own or with a gay friend as co-parent doesn't mean you'll not get the full package with a romantic partner at some point !   Ultimately no-one can make the decision but you.... but there's some great sounding boards on here to help you think things through.  Keep sharing...and keep asking.  Even just reading back over old discussion threads can be really informative.  Welcome to the gang! 
..Di x


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## Zoopy (Dec 27, 2007)

Thank you for your kindness, Emma and Di. I have felt so sad, and lonely, with this journey. And that in itself is such a shame. Having a child is such an opportunity for joy and good feelings. 

I'm determined to take positives out of the experience. One big positive is that my gay friend, a lovely man, said he would co-parent. Ok, he's not my partner, he doesn't love me, but i still felt immensely flattered that another person would consider me a fit mother for their child. And there's a possibility that if I was to be lucky enough to have a child, with him, my child would know it's father from the start. That's huge. And two close girlfriends of mine have offered to donate eggs if it comes to that, again incredibly kind. 

And now I have met some lovely, warm and generous women (that's all you out there who've replied to me today), willing to share your time, experience and knowledge with me, a stranger. We have to take onboard all these good things when the world gets us down, don't we? These are all gestures of care, and that's an amazing thing. I feel privileged to be part of your gang .

I'm tired. You can probably tell. I've spent all day in my home, alone, thinking. I've got some great advice here to mull over. Thank you so much.

Be back soon

Zoopy


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