# Letterbox



## SamCaz (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi all,
I'm new to the site and have had our little boy placed with us for four months now and are about to go to court with adoption order in a couple of weeks.  We also have the annual letter to write to the biological parents (who we have met with) and I just have a question for those of you who have this arrangement, are the biological parents are addressing their letter to us the adoptive parents or to our little boy ?
Thanks.


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## peacelily (Feb 24, 2006)

Hi SamCaz,

Congratulations on your son!  The BPs should write to you, not your son - though bear in mind, depending on their circumstances, they may not necessarily write back    .  I don't mean that to sound patronising, obviously you know a lot more about them, but certainly in our experience, it doesn't always happen.

Peacelily xx


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## Old Timer (Jan 23, 2005)

Hi
Congratulations, it sounds as though your courts are working quicker than our one!!  Nearly 6 months since putting paperwork in and still don't have a final hearing date yet   
Re: letterbox, who they address it to and how they sign it should have been agreed in the letterbox contract.  We have 2 separate ones, our DS's we write to BM and she writes to us, not DS.  Our DD's is different in that they address is to us and DD.  On both they sign with their christian names only.
OT x


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## SamCaz (Apr 15, 2007)

Hi Peacelily and OT,
Thanks for the replies, I was curious because in the meeting we had with birth mum and dad, BM asked the social workers if she could put 'we love and miss you' in the letter as if she is intending to address it to our son and the social workers didn't have a response to this.  I thought they should be writing to us so that has cleared it up for me.
Thanks xx


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## Miny Moo (Jan 13, 2011)

We received 2 letters from BM, 1 for us and 1 for our son. We have not shared the letter with him as we do not feel he is ready, we have just put it away with the other letter box replies we have from other BF members and will share them with him when he is older and ready for them. 

BM has only replied once to letterbox, so we will have to wait and see if we receive annymore over the years.


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## George2805 (Jul 9, 2012)

We have only received 1 letter from BM addressed to ds however he is only 3 so he is not really aware of it yet.  I would be surprised if SW approved BP putting 'we love and miss you' in their letters as this could cause distress to the child.  I am sure if you tell your SW you are not happy for it to be included in the letter then they should discuss this with BM.  

Our BM has also only replied once to our letters (there have been 4 from us) but SS took over a year to forward her letter to us but thats a whole other story.

Hope this helps.


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