# Back to the drawing board



## pollita (Feb 23, 2011)

Ladies, I am so disheartened and upset on this journey. My trips to the clinics stopped in January due to a combination of my BMI being high and also my ovulation dates being unpredictable (although that has since been rectified, I still need to lose some weight). Since December I have been looking for alternative options, and found some private donors through FSDW and Pride Angel, but this months' cycle has been abandoned because the donor showed his true colours and he is just not the right one for me.

I feel like I don't know where to turn next. I've lost some weight but still need to lose more and it's very tough. All I can think is how much I wish that I had started this process 18 months ago when I wanted to. Instead I decided to wait it out and now I'm worse off (gained as much weight as I've just lost in that time, so huge setback). 

I can kind of understand why some women just jump straight to IUI or IVF and be done with the roller coaster of emotions that is TTC


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## moononthetides (Feb 20, 2013)

I need to shift a stone as well. Should we set up a weight loss thread? I find it so difficult to lose weight, am such a comfort eater  

I think this journey is an incredibly difficult one made worse by the fact no one 'really' understands, even other single ladies tend to have varying situations and restrictions and difficulties. It's expensive, painful and stressful. I am going straight for IVF but I don't mind admitting I am scared by it to an extent - it's going to be horribly invasive.   People keep saying it will be worth it and I'm sure it will but these are usually the people who have the support of a partner which we don't have.

Is IUI/IVF an option for you? x


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## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

ivf isn't horribly invasive, it's fine. I think going to the dentist is worse! honest! choice of IVF or a big filling i'd do IVF any day. 

good luck with the weight loss!


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## pollita (Feb 23, 2011)

Thank you both!

Tonight I have filled in the registration forms for a clinic in Denmark to have IUI hopefully, and out of the blue a (seemingly normal and nice) donor from Pride Angel apologising for not seeing my email from January until now, so maybe that will turn into something. 

I ovulate tomorrow by the look of it so I have 4 weeks until my first possible cycle to lose some weight and sort it out. If I could lose more weight I would go for egg share at my local clinic but they won't take me until I've lost at least a stone, but it's an option. I think I will give IUI a go and then if it doesn't work see if I want to go back to Denmark for IUI or just 30 minutes down the road for IVF (terrible fear of needles!!)

A weight loss threat doesn't sound like a bad idea!


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## Diesy (Jul 19, 2010)

Hi Pollita,

Do you want the good news?  YOU'RE 27!!!  That is an awesome place to start!  As for cycle fatigue, the best way to overcome this is to bring out the big guns and take a direct route to effective tx.  This doesn't mean direct to IVF, although that is one way round this.  You could be wandering around an IUI jungle for a while.  It's so hit and miss and reliant on timing.  If going for IUI why not make sure you are in control, particularly if your AF is all over the shop.  A medicated IUI with trigger, tracking scans and a bit of certainty that you know you are going to ovulate.  Pick a clinic that is proactive.  You could try Serum for an IUI.  Donno if that helps any.  

I think you can end up feeling like you are on a treadmill to nowhere with SMC.  I vetoed trying to find a donor or co-parent, scared the hell out of me after what I've been through in relationships.

As for weight, jeezo, I've just given up a major treat and in two weeks I haven't lost weight, although I can see a big difference.  Might try a proper diet next week    Thinking wheat free might be the answer...  So good luck with your own plan.  Give yourself a bit of time to lose some pounds, focus on the good reason why, not what you are missing out or berating yourself for not doing it sooner or not doing it fast enough.  You have time for this.  So no more hitting yourself over the head  

And repeat after me, woohoo I am 27!  (Wish it were me...sort of.)  

Diesy


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