# Not sure how to react to this one



## NixNoo (Aug 19, 2005)

When I was 8 years old I had appendicitis, I was sick for almost a week.  To cut a long story short my appendix burst, I then had peritonitis and I nearly died but luckily had emergency surgery which saved my life leaving me with a nasty scar and also leaving me infertile (no one warned myself or my family of this and no Dr will tell me this is the reason why).  

When I first became ill, my mum tried to get me an appointment to see our GP but my symptoms where diagnosed over the phone and the nurse diagnosed colic and mum was told to give me yogurt and water.  My symptoms persisted and I got no better so my parents called out the Dr, it was evening and a locum came to see me, he diagnosed me as having colic and gave me antibiotics.  This carried on for another day and again I was no better so the same locum came out again and diagnosed colic again. Eventually, as my parents could see I was deteriorating rapidly they insisted our GP came to see me – he immediately diagnosed peritonitis so my appendix had actually burst by then, he said there was no time for an ambulance and got me to hospital.  Luckily I survived, I have always been grateful and feel very lucky that I am here.

However, I found out last night that the locum D that misdiagnosed me TWICE as having colic has died.  I never saw him again from that night he came to see me when I was 8 but I can still see his face.  My immediate reaction was sarcasm saying ‘oh dear what a shame’ but then I thought what a cow, I’m sure he did a lot of excellent work as a GP over the last 30 odd years.

Not really sure how to react, all I know is it’s on my mind and I wanted to write it down.

Nix


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## Dydie (Feb 11, 2005)

Hi Nix 

Poor you Hunnie  

I think you have every right to react to this news with sarcasm, what this lo-cum did to you has had a profound effect on your entire life and if this were to happen today it would be nothing short of professional negligence and he would probably find himself in very deep water.

Mis-diagnosing you once was bad but perhaps forgivable but to continue having this "stop wasting my time" attitude the second time he was called out is something which would be incredibly hard to forgive especially given that you could have died and have been left facing the misery of infertility through your adult life because of his attitude and his mistake.

I still hold some blame against Gp's for failing my Dad, he died of a brain tumor and I know that this may well have killed him in the end but the failings of the medical proffession meant that he was not diagnosed until very late in the day, he only lived for a few weeks after the diagnosis was made, if they had done something when he first went to them (3 years earlier) then he may have at least been given the gift of extra time or he could have enjoyed his last remaining years and I also could have had the chance to tell him many things which were left unsaid.  I also hold some blame against my consultant during an ectopic which due to his negligence ended up rupturing and nearly killing me.

No Nix .... I can understand why you are feeling this way and I think you have every right to respond in this way to the news of his death .... you may ask how many good things this man did in his career, but also ask yourself how many times did he make mistakes ?

Lots of love to you
Dydie xxxx


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## astrid (Feb 10, 2003)

Hi Nixnoo
Along with Dydie i agree this must be so hard for you at the moment to digest... 
I think Nix you have two things going on here at the moment...
Firstly the doctor mis-diagnosing you and Secondly the knock on effect that it has had on your own infertility...
So there is definately a potion of alot of emotions, anger and i am sure shock at the moment...
I feel sad for you because you are also in the position where your hands are alittle, tied due to his recent death...but the sadness of it all, you do have some answers and that is that he couldn't define the cause of your illness TWICE....
I am not sure what to advise you and where you go from here, because i feel that you have very mixed emotions about the past and how it has effected your present future....
Maybe it would be advisable to write to a Governing body (i cannot remember the name of the doctors complaint section) to express the truama that this mis- diagnoses has gone on to affect your life. Athough your life was saved in the end, but the events may not have lead you to a life threatening stage...Also that it doesn't help what effect that this has had on your latter life....
I am sorry you are having to deal with this on top of everything else at the moment...
Take care
love astridxxx


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## Scooby Doo (May 24, 2006)

Hi,

Im not sure if i really should be posting on this board or not as i am only at the beginning of my journey, but i just wanted to say to nix noo how i do empathise with you.  
I also had a burst appendix when i was 8 which was misdiagnosed. My mum took me to the doctors half a dozen times over the space of 2 weeks, and everytime they sent me away saying it was a bug/ virus/ nothing serious.  I strongly remember the night it burst, writhing in agony and crying all night. The next day mum took me back to the doctor who took one look at me and said the same as you - hospital now, no time for ambulance, mum & dad had to take me. I had emergency surgery to save my life.  i was in hospital for 2 weeks, then discharged only to be re admitted the next day with and abcess on my pelvis which ruptured.
Like you, no one ever mentioned to me that this might cause problems with my fertility. Even after ttc for 3 years the doctors never mentioned it, it was only after the first lap & dye they told me about the extent of the damage.
All i feel is complete rage that this could have been prevented.  My mum never took me back to that doctor ever again.
When i told my mum the news after the lap & dye she said " its was terrible, you were so poorley, you are lucky to be here", and i can see her point, but that doesnt make me feel any different towards the doctor who messed up. I know i should get some sort of closure from this, but its hard.
Not sure if my doc is still alive or not, but i would probably have reacted the same way as you.

S
xx


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## emcee (Apr 3, 2005)

Oh Nix, oh ladies, how desperately sad  

Unfortunately I have witnessed incompetence first hand from 3 different GP's and a consultant in my lifetime. And its us who have to live with the consequenses of their actions for the rest of our lives, so its very difficult. And you can't help wondering sometimes if they had done things differently, how different things could have been for us now?

Dydie, I have also been misdiagnosed with an ectopic on two seperate occasions now, and had to resort to my own devices to get seen to and taken seriously with my third. Its such a traumatic thing to go through. I'm so sorry about your dad too honey xxx

Sending you all a very gentle hug, its so heartbreaking  

Love,
Emcee x


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## Dydie (Feb 11, 2005)

Hello my Friends

I don't want to steal this thread from Nix but just wanted to say that it's terrible that so many of us have been put through these types of situations. 

Hugs allround me thinks ....    

Dydie xxxxx


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## NixNoo (Aug 19, 2005)

As usual you’ve really helped me ladies – thank you.  I really didn’t expect myself to be bothered at all about him now but it’s another chapter to get through in life I guess.

Dydie & Emcee – crumbs you’ve been through it, I wonder how we’re all sane sometimes.

Astrid – Never thought of writing to a Governing body -  I did go to a solicitor a while back, not that I’m into this suing bandwagon but I thought it might help in funding our treatment but it’s so difficult to prove especially all those years ago and it was so expensive, we’d have ended up spending more and probably not getting anywhere any way.

Scooby Doo – I’ve just pm’d you my little twin.  Hope you get it cos it’s not in my outbox?!

Ladies – my word we are all the stronger for our experiences, albeit that they are sad and difficult ones – what a wonderful bunch of real friends I have made on this website.

Thank you
Nix
xxxx


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## pink panther (May 4, 2005)

I'm so sorry to read your story nix, it's truly awful that such an awful illness would have such a dire knock-on effect. I used to work on an emergency surgery unit and appedicitis is bad enough but the pain that those with peritnitius have is huge-it must have been awful for you.

One can only hope that this person learnt from this and a repeat of this situation was prevented from happening again.
You musn't beat yourself up about thinking these thoughts about this doctor as his oversight (twice) cost you the right to have children. I think I'd be more worried about someone that didn't feel bitter about this.
xxx


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