# Am I to blame?



## YorkshireSue (Jan 26, 2006)

Hi all,

Not really too sure where I should post this, but I'll try here first, I'm sure I'll get moved to a better home if needs be!!

Its just a dark thought that is in the back of mine constantly at the minute. I have PCOS and I am about 5 stone overweight. 

Do I have PCOS because I'm overweight? Is it all my fault? I feel like an utter failure and I just can't shake it off. I totally blame myself and I can't help it. I feel so bad for my DP, he is an utter angel and I can't imagine not being with him. He would never ever place blame, nor do I think he even connects the two together, but sometimes I feel like I can't look him in the eye because its all my fault we're having problems.

I feel so sad about this. If anyone has any opinions about this, even if it is clarification of my fears, please tell me, I couldn't possibly feel any worse than I do about this.

Thanks all,

Sue


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## Jennifer (Jul 22, 2004)

Awwwwwwwww Sue - Don't blame yourself

As far as I am aware PCOS causes weight problems, NOT the other way around hun.

IF is an awful thing to deal with and we all sometimes feel like you do now but its not our fault - we didn't chose to have these problems and we go the the ends of the earth to try to resolve them at huge emotional and financial cost.

Sending you big hugs and hope you feel better soon  

Love
Jennifer xx xx


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## *Kim* (May 5, 2002)

Hi Sue

As Jennifer has said you have a weight problem because of the PCOS.

I have severe PCOS and although my clinic advised me to lose weight they didnt refuse to treat me once they saw i was trying. I managed to get pregnant on my 2nd cycle of IVF and now have a little boy of 4. 
It is so hard to lose it especially with the PCOS. Try not to give up hope there is some out there.
Love kimx x x


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## YorkshireSue (Jan 26, 2006)

Thank you for your kind words, I very much appreciate them.

I think I've been in a bit of a chicken & egg situation. 

Am I overweight because I have PCOS or do I have PCOS because I'm overweight?

I know you're probably right and its the first option, but I can't help thinking I have done this to myself and being childless is my punishment for being greedy. 

If somone was to say that to me I would tell them to stop being so hard on themselves and unreasonable, I just can't seem to take my own advice!!

But thanks again, you have helped and I am very grateful.

Sue x


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## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

sue

i too have pcos and have loads of excess weight! 
I was a normal weight until i was 16 and then piled loads on in a very short space of time. i was then diagnosed with Pcos and since then have only manged to shift a fraction of the weight i put on. 
One of the pcos symptoms is putting on weight and unfortunetly also finding it hard to lose weight. 
My consultant had a med student in with her at my last visit and she explained to the med student about why pcos sufferer struggle with their weight and it is really difficult to lose, so they do know its not our fault. 
guess what im trying to say is it really isnt your fault and dont beat yourself up about it, easier said than done i know. it took me a while to realise that its not my fault. It is hard when you want to get pg so much and you cant lose any weight and it seems like its our fault that its not happening, it truly isnt.

Sending you a big 

love
suzie xx


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## icky (Oct 6, 2005)

HI Sue
Its icky from yorkshire thread just wanted to send you a big  . I havn't got pcos myself so cant offer any advice just to let you know Im here if you need me 
xxx


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