# What are my chances?



## Artypants (Jan 6, 2012)

Hi ladies

Hoping for some sympathy and advice if poss! I am relativley new to the TTC in comparison to the majority of you lovley ladies (and gents here) I have been with my BF for 14 months, and early on i had to tell him about my endo and that it might be tricky for us. We both met when we were 34, going on 35, (I just turned 36) so we knew time was of the essence. After 6 monthd together we decided to see what happened when I came off the pill and so far nothing after 9 months.

In this time I had a laparoscopy (number 6) and my tubes and ovary wre fused together, this was all fixed and according to the surgeon, my womb and other organs looked OK. However I still felt further investigation was needed and my 2 blod tets came back as high FSH of 12 & 12.1. My boyfriend also has issues, his sperm came back as 98% abnormal forms, so between us we are both very upset about the results. We had a very frank conversation about whether to carry on with trying for a baby at all and I even gave him the option to leave me and go and find someone else who is healthy! 

So in a rather long winded way, what are our chance or conceiving naturally, or is our best hope IVF? neither of us feels ready to go for immediate treatment and we feel absolutley floored by what we are facing. it changes everythign doesn't it! Maybe we rushed in too quickly to find out whether we were able to have a family, age is the main factor in all of these decisions, its sods law that I met my lovely boyfriend so late in life in terms of fertility


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## the_tempress89 (Oct 19, 2011)

hi, im so sorry to hear of your struggle. i dont really have experience of what u have been through as i havent yet had my tests done, but what i can say is ttc is a very emotional and stressfull time, recieving those dreaded bfn can be flooring, but i think that if u and your partner know that ur chances are slim, i dont see the point in not trying, try and have fun with it though and dont make it all about ttc, unfortunatly thats what my dp and i have done and its made things alot harder. if u dont feel ready to start treatment but feel that time is running thinnner for you both then there is no harm in trying, 

i hope this gives u alittle insight and sorry i cant be of more help xx


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## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

Artypants, soo sorry that you and your bh both have issues, and this happened with me and hubby, we both had issues, and both gave each other the option to go and find a perfectly working model - infertility can put soo much stress on a couple, and it doesn't matter if you've been together 14 months or 14 years... it really tests your metal as a couple.  
But good on you both for getting tests done relatively early on in the relationship, at least you know what you're possibly facing.... as the temptress has mentioned, if you get into the mindset that sex is simply for babymaking, the physical side suffers, then it becomes a downright chore, especially when you go at it like a couple of bunnies around ovulation....the spark soon fades hahaha

Your boyfriend might up his potency if he takes some multivitamins, my hubby had a zero count, and a few months on Wellman we were able to use 1 of his million swimmers for icsi.

I wouldn't worry too much about you fsh level, it only takes one good egg o)
Best wishes 
Sheila


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## Mrs B (was Mrs B to be) (Dec 4, 2009)

Hi

my fsh was also high at 18 and we were refused ivf on nhs as they said our best chance was conceiving naturally. After 2.5 years of trying and a m/c half way thru I fell pg with twins. How many times have they tested dh sperm? My dh first test was awful and cons suspected it could have been left too long, next test was fine. Might be worth getting re-test? Wishing you all the luck in the world, big hugs xx


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## Artypants (Jan 6, 2012)

Thanks for your replies ladies, DB has been testd once, so I guess they will retest at some point, he is taking a huge conconction of vitamins (as am I) and we are both going for acupuncture so I hope this will give us a boost and you never know we might get lucky.

We have decided to try and put our relationship into compartments so it doesnt consume us with the whole fertility thing, we will do our best to carry on as normal and deal with this issue as and when we need to. We have our follow up appointment on the 15th March so until then we are trying not to think the worst which is tough!

Mrs B thats amazing getting pg naturally with twins! WOW, congrats x

All the best to you xx


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## One shot x (Jan 2, 2012)

Hiii sorry Ian new trying to find out how I write a post ?? Ha ha how dim aim I have I posted this or sent you a message ha sorry Kerrie x


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## mandimoo (Feb 28, 2011)

Hi Artypants, 

I was in a similar situation to you in that I hadn't really wanted a BB until much later in life (about 35/36 when I started to think I had actually met the right person at long last and it might be a nice idea).  I came off all contraception and nothing happened for a couple of years so went to GP, got some basic tests and then referred to fertility clinic and had my appointment with the consultant.  At this appointment my period was a couple of days late and I thought nothing of it.  My cycle had seemed to be getting longer over the last couple of years and I assumed it was due to the adenemyosis.  They gave me a urine preg test to be on the safe side and flip me, I was pregnant naturally.  Sadly it was ectopic and I lost that tube.  It took time for my next appointment with the clinic to come through but eventually I went thru a round of IVF that resulted in pregnancy.  Again sadly, this ended in m/c.  This m/c was still not finished after 3 months and took surgery to resolve.  Then I found out my remaining tube was completely blocked.  Then I had a change of consultant and this brings me right up to date.  What I have summarised in a few sentences above, took about 3 or 4 years to pass in real time.

Im sorry to go on and on about my own personal circumstance, but the point I am trying to make is this.  I though I had a lot of time to TTC.  Circumstance has conspired and here I am, past my 40th birthday and desperately trying to get a cycle in even though the statistics say that now, my changes are sooo slim.

You have a much better chance of fertility treatment working at the age you are now.  I understand the urge that you dont want interference in what should be so natural, but sadly for some of us its just not that straight forward.  You dont know how time may conspire against you and you will still have plenty of chance to try naturally if assisted conception does not work for you.

Whatever you decide, I send you much love and luck


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## Artypants (Jan 6, 2012)

Thanks Mandymoo, I have a friend who also started ttc later in life and I now feel glad that I didnt wait too long to find out about my situation, so yes its always best to be well informed when facing these issues. I know I have got a long journey ahead so best get it all checked out now and not just assume everything is in full working order!

Lots of love and luck to you too xx


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