# Starting the journey part III



## *Kim*

New home for you.


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## Bev H

Dear Karen & Rich
Hope today has gone well for you both, hope to catch up with your news later .
Lots of love Bev H xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Bev

Today was a lot more interesting than last week, we had some guest speakers who were really interesting and the group activities were good too.

We got to have a look today at a copy of Be my Parent which is a magazine that shows pictures and gives narratives of children for whom they are looking for parents for. I didn't think last week I'd be able to look at it, but it really gives you an insight into some of the background and reasons why children come up for adoption.

A week to go for day three and this time in 2 weeks the course will be done and then the hard work really begins.

I hope you are well. How are you getting along with coming to your decision?

keep in touch, speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
How are you? You must be getting really excited as the time comes ever closer!! Hope today went well again, I'm sure it did. Lots of love Bev H xxx


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## Hope 2 B

Hi Karen & Rich


Hope today went well , hows it been going ??


Take care , love Gail xxxxxxxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Everyone

Well today has been really heavy - we have been discussing abuse. I feel really tired and emotionally drained.

Day four (final day) next Tuesday and then our home study starts. That should take about 3 months. Then soon after we go to panel and then its just a matter of time.

I am really glad that our holiday is soon, as I am feeling really frazzled. Haven't really had a break from IF or Adoption for quite a while, so looking forward to a week in the sun to come back raring to go and get further along the road to our goal.

Thank you all for your support and good wishes.
Love
Karen x


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## Bev H

Dear Karen & Rich
I really do admire you both and know you will be wonderful parents - it will all be worth it in the end. 
The timing of your holiday will be perfect - you can go away and chill out so make the most of it 'cos then you'll be busy being mum and dad !!!!  
Speak to you again soon. lots of love and good wishes Bev H xxxx


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## Dee

Hi Karen

Hope you and Rich have a wonderful holiday 

Enjoy your break
Love
Dee
xx


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## SueL

Karen and Rich, glad all is going well, even if today was "heavy". Have a wonderful holiday you have worked so hard for everything!

Love Sue
xx


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## Nicky

Hi Karen - I've been checking your post periodically and am glad to read all is going well. It will be worth it in the end and your holiday is perfectly timed!! Good luck with the remainder of the sessions!!

Love Nicky xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Deborah

I am off to the Algarve. I'm quite suntanned already as I have been cheating and hired a sunbed for four weeks!!!

It would be good if you could get a degree too, would be worth all the hardwork and disturbed nights sleep thinking about it all.

Nicky - thanks for your good wishes too.

Love
Karen x


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## Juel

Have a lovely holiday Karen,the Algarve is lovely...get those  ready matey 
luv
juelxx


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Just wishing you more luck for tomorrow (last one)  
Lots of love and have a fab  holiday.
lots of love Bev H xxxx


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## Hope 2 B

Dear Karen & Rich 

Just wanted to say 'GOOD LUCK ' for today and have a fantastic holiday ! ........


Love Gail xxxxxxx


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## KarenM

Hi All

Just a quick update from me as things have gone a little quiet for the moment.

Well we finished our course on 24th June and then went away on our hols (just what the doctor ordered). We are now waiting for the social worker to contact us so that we can start on the next part of the process which is the home study. Lots of work and visits etc.

Once this is complete, we will go to panel to be officially 'approved', and then the matching starts. Once a match is made, it all happens really quickly. firstly we have some visits and go to foster carer for bath and bedtime etc. we go on some trips to the park and that short of thing. They come and stay with us over night. This all happens in a three week period and provided everyone is happy, they will then move in with us.

Just relishing our last few months as a child free house. Off on a girlie night out tomorrow. We did have some thoughts whilst we were away on holiday about what life would be like with them and what lfe would be like without them.

We have both agreed though that if it doesn't happen within a timeframe that we have agreed between us, then we will not go ahead. I know that sounds selfish, but by that time (and it is quite a way away) we will have got so used to life being just the two of us that it will be too hard to make the adjustment.

I'll let you all know as soon as we hear something from our social worker.

In the meantime, good luck everyone with whatever stage you are at.

Love
Karen xx


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## Dee

Hi Karen

It doesn't sound selfish to me at all ... I wish you both all the luck in the world.

Love
Dee
xxx


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Welcome back hope you had a fab time.
I really hope things happen quickly for you as you have done all this hard work and preparation and you will be such wonderful parents. You are not selfish at all in your way of thinking just beeing honest and realistic.
Look forward to hearing from you SOON!!!
Love and best wishes Bev H xxx


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## KarenM

Hi Everyone

Well I rang the social services yesterday to find out why we haven't heard anything as they said it would be pretty soon after our course that we would be assigned a social worker.

It turns out that the authority we did our training with have delayed sending out the feedback sheets, and our authority are not able to action it unless they have the written documents.

She did tell me though that they have been verbally told that everything was ok with us on the course and as there was a panel day yesterday that there have been a couple of social workers freed up to take on our case.

She thinks she should get the paper work back by the end of this week, so hopefully next week we will here who our SW is going to be.

Watch this space.......

Lily - how are you getting on with starting your journey?

Justine - How is the clomid going?

Bev - been reading and keeping up to date with your posts on July/Aug board. good luck with the scan today, and happy birthday to Garry for next week.

To everyone else, hope you are getting on ok.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## SueL

Karen it's looking really good for you and Rich, how exciting! Wishing you all the best!!! 

Love Sue
xxx


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Well I rang social services again last Friday and we are 'top of the pile'. Still haven't heard anything so far this week, so I am giving it until Friday again and will chase them up.

It is really annoying as they are crying out for people to be adoptive parents and then those that do apply get left waiting all the time. How long can we possibly be 'top of the pile' for??

Hopefully I'll have some more positive news by the time the week is through.

I'll keep you all posted.

Bye for now
Karen x


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## Bev H

Dear Karen,
I wondered what was happening - the wait must be awful but it will be worth it in the end when you get your 2 little ones .
Thanks for your messages of support, much appreciated.
I'll be keeping an eye on you now, lots of love Bev H xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi Bev

Good to hear from you. Hope your ec went well today. I will check your messages in a moment.

Well I think my post this morning was a bit of a jinx. Came home from work to a phone message which said that they had had an allocation meeting today and that unfortunately we had not been allocated. It appears they have allocated sw's out to those people who finished a recent course, despite the fact that we have been finished longer and had been clearly marked at the top of the pile as priority.

Apparently they have another allocation meeting next week and we should hear something after that. Well they will be hearing from me first. I am not happy that they have done this to us. rich and I spent 2 and a half years of our lives being messed around by doctors and consultants and so we are not going to let it happen again.

I'll let you all know how I get on with my call tomorrow.

Sorry for the rant.

Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## Mel

Karen,

All i can say is typical SW's and i hope they get what for from you after all you have been through, you deserve too much to be on the top of that list.

Thinking of you both and hope you get somewhere with them.

Mel

x x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Sorry to read this but you go and let them have it ^furious^ ^furious^ ^furious^ - how dare they treat you like this. It's so unfair to you and Rich and the children who are waiting for you............
Good luck tomorrow, Love Bev xxxx


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## *Kim*

Hope you get some satisfaction Karen. Its a pity they dont get a move on to find good homes for these children.

Love Kim x x x


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## Dee

Hi Karen

Sorry to hear you'ce been mucked about ... it's not fair, no wonder you are mad!

Hope you get much much better news very very soon.

Love
Dee
xxx


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## Allie K

Karen,

It must be soooooo frustrating. Hope they sort themselves out and things get moving soon.

Allie


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Here's an update.........

I rang the adoption people when I was off on Tuesday, as they hadn't returned my call from the previous week.

She basically told me that the reason we hadn't been allocated at the meeting the other week, was because they have had an influx of 5-8 year olds and that a few people who had done the course after us, were looking to be matched with this age group, therefore the priority is not done on who finished the course first, but on the priority cases in terms of the children.

I was fine with this and said I understood, but all I needed was to have been told that in the first place. I told her that we weren't prepared to take any messing, as we had spent nearly 2 and a half years of our lives being messed around by doctors and consultants in idenitfying our infertility.

She told me that the next allocations meeting is on the 2nd September, and that she would do her utmost to get us allocated at that meeting. In the meantime, she has explained in a bit more detail what we need to do for the next stage, so we can now go ahead and do some of it for ourselves, which should speed things up a bit.

I'll let you know more as soon as i hear.

Bye for now
Karen x


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## *Kim*

Good luck Karen
Hope you get some positive news on the 2nd.

Love Kim x x x


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## Juel

Good luck karen...i hope the 2nd brings you good news & you're another step up that ladder!!
Hope all goes well for you
luv
juel xxx


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Got your message thanks. Thinking of you,
love and hugs Bev H xxxx


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## Allie K

Karen,

Hope you get some news on the 2nd. Remember that every day now brings you one day closer to being a mum and dad. You're nearly there now!

Best wishes

Allie


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## Jo

Karen

Tomorrow brings you another day closer to your dream, hope the days pass quickly for you until the 2nd 

Love Jo
x x x


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## sophie

Karen

Really hope you get some progress on the 2nd. Sounds like a good reason for the delay but why on earth couldn't they have told you that in the first place. Grrrr

Anyway not long till the 2nd and as the others have said one step closer to being a mummy

good luck
sophie
x


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## jan welshy

Good luck Karen!!!!!!!!


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## KarenM

YIPEEEE!!!!

The social worker has rung today, and she is 99.9% sure that she can allocate us on 2nd September.

We have already done quite a bit of the work, just need to type it up.

So hopefully in a couple of weeks we will be another step closer.

I'll keep you posted.

Love
Karen x


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## SueL

Excellent news Karen, just what you needed to here, all is crossed!

Love Sue
xxx


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## Dee

Karen,

That's brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!     

You really are now on your way!

Good Luck for the 2nd ... I'll be thinking of you.

Loads of Love
Dee
xxx


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## Bev H

Dear Karen
That is fantastic news - the best I've heard all day!!
You must be so excited, roll on 2nd Sept.
Take care, love Bev H xxxx


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## *Kim*

Karen 

That is brilliant news. Cant wait to see your post.

Bev ^group^ ^group^ for you.For still worrying about others today.

Love Kim x x x


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## Allie K

Karen 

That is fantastic . Can't wait to hear more news from you.

You must be so excited!

All the best

Allie


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## Mel

Fantastic news Karen,

You will soon have that very special child/children who will have the most wanted mummy and daddy they deserve........................im so excited for you both.

Mel

x x


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## Fee

Karen and dh - so thrilled for you.
I hope you don't mind me dropping in here - I just wanted to get a feel for things.
I haven't posted here before...we were accepted for the adoption course in 1998 and had to cancel because I fell pg!! But all these years on and out txt cycles have been a disaster. I think it isn't meant to be, so I dug out the adoption paperwork. I'd like to get started today but need to persuade DH who isn't keen to talk about emotions and have our private life scrutinised in depth. I'm past caring to tell you the truth.
I'd love to adopt from overseas. Is anyone else doing this?
Fee xx


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## Bev H

Dear Karen
Just want to say I hope everything goes well on Tuesday 2nd - I won't be able to get on line tomorrow so I'll be thinking of you both and hope your prayers and dreams are answered  
Can't wait to hear your news it will be so exciting  .
Take care lots of love Bev H xxxxx


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## wynnster

All the best for tomorrow Karen & DH^thumbsup^ thinking of you.

Hope all your dreams come true

Love Kim xxxxx


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## LizzyB

Karen - haven't spoken to you before but have been following your journey,
Just wanted to wish you best of luck for tomorrow ^thumbsup^

Much love, Lizzy xx


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## SueL

Dear Karen and Rich, good luck for tomorrow, fingers crossed you get the news that you are dreaming of!

Lots of Love
Sue
xxxxxx


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## Dee

Hi Karen

Wishing you and Rich loads of luck for tomorrow

Love
Dee
xxx


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## Allie K

Karen 

I hope that tomorrow's meeting goes well and I look forward to hearing your news.

Love

Allie


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## *Kim*

Karen wishing you lots of luck for tomorrow. Hope you get the news you have been waiting for.

Love Kim x x x


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## KarenM

Hi girls

Thanks for all your good luck messages. I am hoping for a phone call later on today if not first thing tomorrow. As soon as I know something I will be straight on here to tell you all.

Thanks again
Love
Karen x


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## Flo

Dear Karen,

I have been following your progress since you set out on the adoption route and I am so excited that you have finally got to this stage. Your heart must be in your mouth!

Wishing you lots and lots of luck. Can't wait to read the next installment!

Flo
xxx


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## Dee

Oh Karen

I have been sneakily checking in on you all day at work (not mean't too) hoping that I am not being monitored!

Now it looks like the call isn't going to come until tomorrow and I am out of the office in an off-site meeting all day tomorrow. So when I don't do the instant "YEAH " you know it' not cause I'm not thinking of you!

Wishing you so much good luck
Love
Dee
xxx


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## sophie

Hi Karen

lots of luck for the phone call tomorrow. Hope they don't keep you waiting too long

love

Sophiex


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## KarenM

Hi girls

Got the call today........we HAVE been allocated this time!!! But.........the social worker we've been aloocated is currently off sick and is due to return on Monday. We then go away for a week next Saturday (13th) so things aren't going to move for a little while but it is a start.

Thanks again for all your encouraging messages.

Love
Karen x


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## *Kim*

Great news Karen. Shame about her being off sick but at least your another step onwards.
Hope it wont be long till you have your little one/s look forward to reading your posts.

Love Kim x x x


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## Bev H

Hi Karen
Finally, it is happening - sorry about the further wait but at least you know when you come home you'll be going to collect your 2 children!!  What a feeling. 
Catch up soon, lots of love Bev H xxx


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## Flo

Argggggggggggg, you must be so frustrated at the short delay, but what fantastic news! 

Not long now!

Flo
xxx


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## KarenM

This is only the start of it really.........

We've now got three months work to do on our home study. We then have to be formally approved and it is only then that we start to be matched with the children. I don't anticipate that we will have the children until about April next year, in which case the whole process will have taken 14 months.

It is a long hard slog and whilst it is all happening we are starting to get used to life being just the two of us. If it does happen in April next year then i will be dead pleased as it will mean I can have the summer off work and if this summer is anything to go by, it will be fab.

I'll keep you all posted on the rest of our journey.

TTFN
Karen x


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## SueL

Hi Karen

Yes 14 months is a long time to wait for your children to come home to you but it will be well worth it  

can't believe you have another hurdle in your assigned person being sick, how silly is that! 

Good luck
Love Sue
xxxx


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## wynnster

Karen,

aaahhhhh how frustrating, more waiting!

But April will be here before you know it, it is nearlly xmas! ^shocked^ and then jast passed the january sales your angels will be with you,
Enjoy your next few months of freedom.

Love 
Kim 
xxxx


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## KarenM

Hi everyone

Well at long last some good news. I decided enough was enough,so I bit the bullet and rang social services and got to speak to our SW.

We have made 2 dates for our home study, so he is coming to see us to start that on 4th and then 12th November. He's just come back from sick leave is running a course for the next two weeks, and then is on holiday for 3!!!!

He has said that we should go to panel in Feb. provided everything goes to plan then my dream of having next summer off work may be a reality.

I'll keep you posted
Love
Karen x


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## sophie

Hi Karen

That's great news! I remember my friend who adopted at xmas also had a terrible time with a SW who was either on holiday, off sick, working part time etc etc but she got there in the end and sounds like you are well on your way as well now!

S
x


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## wynnster

Karen great news , fingers crossed that next will be spent with your very own   ^thumbsup^

Bl**dy SW's! 

Kim xxx


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## *Kim*

Brilliant news Karen. Pity these Sw's cant get off their  and get a move on. They must have more time off than the schoolkids.

GOOD LUCK

Love Kimx x x


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## Dee

YEAH!

At last really good news for you ... it *IS * going to happen .. Mummy!

Good luck with the home visits

Love
Dee
xxx


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## Jo

Brilliant news Karen, you are soon going to get your family, fantastic news, and you will have a great summer and life from there on.

Love Jo
x x x


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## Mel

Karen and DH

Fantastic news, at long last eh  - these bloody SW, well it wont be long before its all go and you have your wonderful children.

Lots of hugs to you

Mel

x x


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