# 45 and single



## gb02005 (Oct 4, 2010)

I am 45 with no partner and would like to have a baby but have no idea where to start.  Any advise greatly appreciated and also whether I should stick with a local clinic (am based in Berkshire) or would I receive more help abroad?


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## Bethany915 (Aug 1, 2010)

Hi GB

Might be worth looking at the HFEA web-site - they have a "clinic search" section http://guide.hfea.gov.uk/guide/ which includes details about age eligibility. I think some have an upper limit of 45 so you would need to get a move on for those ones! Also, you need to source some sperm - I have a KD so don't have personal experience but I understand the waiting lists are long in the UK. As for being single, I believe that almost all of the UK clinics will treat singlies once you have done a session with their counsellor to show that you have suitable plans to care for the child.

If you are happy to go abroad, it is easier to get hold of sperm - but again some of the clinics have upper age limits around 45 / 46. Denmark and Czech Republic seem popular places to go - try looking on the Singlies Abroad thread or the general Abroad boards. Also, you might want to introduce yourself over on the general singlies board - there might be some other girls there who would be able to help (at least as far as the sperm is concerned).

You might also want to consider at your age whether to try with your own eggs or go down the route of donor eggs - or even adopt an embryo? Lots to consider  . Again, there is lots of info here on FF about those topics.

Hope that helps and good luck with your journey  .

B xx

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## lily17 (Sep 25, 2008)

Hiya


I would highly recommend the clinic I go to AVA Peter in St Petersburg Russia, sounds far away and scary , but Dr Olga Zaysteff and her team are 2nd to none and get very good results. Im afraid at 45 you would have to go for donor eggs/sperm, but my clinic do what they call 'embryo adoption' specifically for single women or married women who have fertility issues on both sides. Its about £2000 for frozen embryo adoption, then you have flights accomodation and visa etc. I always fly to amsterdam then onto St Petersburg. I had a frozen embryo transfer last week, went to the clinic on Tues , had the proceedure done on the wednesday and flew back the same day!!!...now waiting to see if its worked!!!


The problem with the UK is everything takes sooooo long...and at 45 you cant afford to hang around.... the waiting list for donor eggs even at the speediest clinics is around 9months...but most are about a year or more!!!


good luck on your journey, dont hesitate to ask any question ( I feel Im an old hand at this now!!)


Lily X


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Hi gb and welcome to FF,

Come and join us on the Single Girls' Boards where you'll find lots of single women at all stages of this fertility journey  
Link here to main singles board:
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=403.0

Where to start? 
Well, your first step will probably be to get an initial consultation at a clinic to assess your options.

They will probably recommend some basic tests (FSH, LH etc) to check hormone levels etc. Maybe AMH to look at ovarian reserve.

Treatment options are then IUI or IVF. Clinics such as LWC in London have large sperm banks and tend to have no waiting lists for IUI or IVF with your own eggs. You'd have to check with your local clinic re their sperm availability.

I'll be honest here, at 45yrs old your chances of success with your own eggs are low. I have a feeling I've read somewhere that there have been no live births to women over 44 via IVF in the UK in the past 2-3 yrs. I say this not to bring doom and gloom but just to make you aware that it is likely you will be recommended the donor egg route from the beginning as success rates for IUI/IVF with your own eggs are likely to be something like 1%

If you do opt for the donor egg route, you can do this in the UK but the waiting lists for donor eggs can be quite long - CRM and LWC in London seem to be the best bets for shorter lists although even these are 6-9 months as a minimum. And you'd need to budget ca £8000 for one attempt...PM me if you want more info on this - I've had DE IVF at LWC and also had initial consultations etc at CRM.

Abroad there are clinics with little or no waiting list for donor eggs and costs can be (although not always) lower than the UK. One thing to note when going abroad though is that donors are anonymous so you/the child will not be able to find out anything more than the basic physical characteristics nor contact the donor in the future. In the UK donors are all ID release so when the child turns 18 they have the right to additional information and contact details for the donor.

I hope I haven't overwhelmed you with information in one go, or depressed you by bringing up the issue of donor eggs straight away but I think it's better to be realistic...

Feel free to PM me if you have questions and do come and say hello on the singles boards
Best of luck with it all,
Suitcase
x


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