# Newbie - First Failed IVF cycle



## julymermaid (Jul 12, 2010)

Hi everyone ,

My first IVF cycle was cancelled today due to a poor response to Fostimon.
I had only 1 follie big enough to do anything with and the rest 8 didn't do much despite my frug level being pushed up to 450 .

I feel devastated and can't process why things happen the way they do ... life feels terribly unfair right now ... spent all day crying and wondering if I am even destined to ever be a mum .... the one thing I want the most


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## maggymay (Jul 3, 2010)

Hi Julymermaid

sorry your cycle was cancelled   hopefully your follow up consultation can provide some answers and a way forward   

I'm a newbie to this too - just got a bfn on our first attempt - have v low ovarian reserve and so only got one embryo, we knew odds were against us, but were hoping against hope... there's been a lot of tears here too, but we're starting to plan another attempt and trying to stay positive

   to you and hope you're feeling a little better today

Maggymay x


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## julymermaid (Jul 12, 2010)

Hi Maggi,

Well we're in the exact same boat then ... So sorry to hear about your BFN?  
I didn't even know you could choose to go ahead with low follicles ... Well look at the bright side ...you at least got that far ... I was told to not bother at all as I'd just be wasting money (we're privately funding this and its not easy !!)

What's your AMH? 
I'm 35 with a pre-endometriosis surgery AMH of 12.8
They have re-tested me now as they think it might have come down after the surgery and hence could be the reason why the first protocol didn't work.

I'll get my AMH results next wednesday and we will then evaluate another protocol ....
Keeping my fingers crossed ....

When is your next consultation? Will keep my fingers crossed for you hun 
I've been told that IVF is a hit and trial of drug combinations and they need to get the right balance between suppressants and stimulants to make it work to your body requirememts ... so there's hope yet   
xx


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## maggymay (Jul 3, 2010)

totally with you on the funding issue - am not in the uk, so no nhs, paying for everything ourselves...

My AMH is 1.9 so I was on the short protocol, had a very slow response to the drugs but scans showed 5 or 6 follicles so we got the go-ahead. Only got 2 eggs, and then only 1 fertilised - it was doing well though, 8 cell on a 3 day transfer, but I also have auto-immune stuff going on so implantation was a long-shot... we are grateful we got that far, and we are starting to feel a bit more positive about the next go   

Am back for review in 2 weeks with lots of questions - the 'follow-up consultation' threads here are very helpful   There's also a few of us in the same boat as you in the July/August cycle buddies thread.

Good luck for your test results and review    

Maggymay x


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## julymermaid (Jul 12, 2010)

Thanks Maggi ...

You have no idea how nice it feels to be able to talk this through with someone who really grasps the full reality of a negative cycle.

I'd taken a few days off work to get over the depression of it all and after a long time today, I've had the guts to get back to work and normal life.

I'll pray for your next cycle to go well ....do keep me informed ... here's a truckload of positive energy coming your way ...(Yes I believe in all these things  

~Do let me know which thread I should get on to ... can really use a support system right now ...

Take care  and all the very very very best ....


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## maggymay (Jul 3, 2010)

hope your first day back to work goes ok 

have a look here http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=10.0 if you haven't already - these forums are so huge and sprawling it's hard to find the ones that match your circumstances, but the mods on the intro board have loads of suggestions

I spent hours just reading when I came on there first... It's been really helpful too, reassuring me that I wasn't going mad  and pointing me towards info and research so I feel a bit more in control of my treatment, not at the mercy of doctors 

Mind yourself this weekend 

Maggymay x


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## julymermaid (Jul 12, 2010)

Hi MaggiMay,

Am having the worst possible day ever again ... I know I did think the cancelled IVF couldn't be topped....but got my AMH results today and I'm a miserably low 0.4 pmol/l

I was 12.8 just six months back and since then I've had an Endometriosis surgery which seems to have damaged my ovaries !!

I am gutted and have spent the last six hours in bed crying myself silly.

Is there still hope?  Does anyone know of anyone conceiving with low AMH?

Please please please let me know if you have ... I'm desperate for some hope and can use anything at all that keeps up my hopes of being a mum someday 

-July


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## maggymay (Jul 3, 2010)

aw July  sorry to hear you've had such a horrible day  this is just another step on the journey, don't give up hope   

I'm still at the figuring-it-out stage, but have a look at the Poor Responders threads in the IVF section, there's lots of girls in the same boat and success stories too http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=3.0

Hope you're being minded and spoiled this evening 

Maggymay x


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## julymermaid (Jul 12, 2010)

Thanks Maggimay.... just reading up all the posts on low AMH levels is giving me hope ...xx


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