# new member saying hi



## s.j. (Jan 25, 2005)

Hi there,

I'm not sure if this is the right place to come for moral support or what, but i can only try. I've been married for 2 1/2 years now and we've been TTC for exactly 1 year. Things are getting a little frustrating but we're still hopeful of a natural conception. I'm aware that this board is primarily for men/couples struggling with fertility issues (hope that doesn't sound too insensitive: if so, sorry) but I'm not at that stage yet.

What is frustrating me most is the lack of moral support for men who are TTC. It seems to me that pregnancy is so geared around women that the guys who lovingly support them seem to get left out of the picture somewhat.

My DW has got lots of encouragement and support from iVillage and one or two other on-line communities, and in a month of serious searching, I have found almost nothing similar for guys. There are one or two for new dads, and a few like this one, but nothing general for guys who are TTC, supporting their DP's and just need a male perspective on things.

We've not told any1 we are TFAB cos all we'll get is "you pregnant yet?" or "so when am i gonna be a grandparent / aunt / uncle / etc?", so while DW is getting lots of moral support from other girls on iVillage, I'm feeling increasingly isolated in the process. I know DW doesn't see me as just a sperm donor, but that's how I'm left feeling by the lack of support.

Sorry to whinge when so many of you seem to be struggling with bigger and more important issues than mine - almost seems petty - but if this is not the right place to come, and someone can point me in the right direction then I'd be most grateful. Equally, if this is a good place to be, then I'll be dead chuffed.

Good luck to all TFAB by what ever means... just can't wait to be a dad, one day

SJ


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## Guest (Jan 29, 2005)

Hello mate,
Welcome to the site bud this is the ideal for you, sound off and whinge any time you want any problems just sound off mate all the best mate in ttc

all the best mate


carl


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## s.j. (Jan 25, 2005)

Thanks Carl,

Just venting made me feel a bit better.  

All the best

SJ


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## Catch22 (Oct 12, 2003)

Hi SJ,

and welcome to ff. You may not be currently going through tx, but you sure are in good company!! All us guys in here are either, like you.. desperately ttc, or have been going through the same emotional rollercoaster you're on very recently.

Moral support and plenty of advice is here for you 24/7 my friend... just give us a shout, can't guarantee and immediate answer, but an answer will be forthcoming as soon as one of us logs on (we seem not to get as much time as our dw's!!).

Off to bed v soon... got a 4.45am start and an 11.30pm finish tomorrow... can't wait!!!!!!

Catch


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## Paula131DH (Jan 29, 2005)

goodevening to all the DH after My DW was on the site i thought i would get involed. if anyone would like to know about what DH go though when our DW start IVF then I've just gone though it. and have just come out of that part and have just started to good part of Pregnancy.


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## s.j. (Jan 25, 2005)

Hey guys

Thanks for the welcome. Good to finally be among friends!
Catch - a fellow fisherman! Good man!
Not caught anything bigger than a 3lb Tench - but i only go fishing when i can and that's not very often and, frankly. i'm rubbish. Good to get away tho and chill.
Take care one and all...

sj


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## Andy_N_Yil (Jun 27, 2003)

S.j. -  I actually made the mistake of telling some friends we were ttc at the start, I did feel like a prat as one by one they got pregnant...  

Problem was I always wanted kids, but most people expect women to get clucky or otherwise.  Anyway at least you've found a place to talk/rant/moan/joke.

Regards
Andy


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## s.j. (Jan 25, 2005)

cheers andy
so good to FINALLY   find this place
i have to admit we didn't think it would take us over a year   but hey!  , at least we're still enjoying trying   so it can't be all bad
take care

sj


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## GillandPeter (Nov 19, 2004)

Hi Sj,

As all the other guys said welcome to the site.
I was told about it a few months and don't come on here very often but when I do I spend a few hours reading peoples posts and stories and leaving a few messages of my own. It is a great support and its great to know that there is some other guys out there you can peak to who know how you are feeling and know what you ar going through. So good luck with your plans for TFAB.

Peter


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## stevejc (Oct 22, 2004)

Hi sj

Big welcome! I was feeling exactly the same as you and came across this site. It's enough to be able to vent feelings and know those who read it understand. I've found IF quite isolating and yet I'm not short of friends, family and belong to a great church. But if folk haven't walked in these shoes, they can't possibly understand. Try and acept that they can't and don't and you get less frustrated with them. Then come on here and rant for a while. works wonders  

Wishing you well my friend

Steve


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