# Looking to start or going through Adoption Part 9



## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

New home ladies to welcome all of our new comers. Hope I've managed to keep track of everyones updates.

Welcome Pam and Nerys.

*Karen *: Approved at panel on 22nd April. Now Mummy to X (moved in 8/11/04) and have her sister moving in on 7/12/04

*Bex *(Bex32): Approved at panel in April. X moved in on 8/11/04

*Caroline W*: Approved at panel in September 2004, now awaiting a suitable match.

*Cindy*: Approved at panel on 27th October 2004. Now awaiting a suitable match

*Ann*: Approved at panel on 4th November 2004. Now awaiting suitable match

*Ruth*: Currently doing home assessment

*Ang* (Molly 2003): Course completed awaiting allocation of SW

*Everhopeful*: Currently doing home assessment

*Mandy* (MSW): Starting home assessment in January

*Nat* (Crazy): Currently doing home assessment.

*Kylie* (Boomerang Girl): Allocated SW. prep course Jan/Feb 05.

*Homer & Marge*: Prep course September.

*Nicola *(NickyDuncanFinn): Prep course January?

*Nicky*: Currently doing home assessment

*Shannis*: Prep course starts 2/9/04

*Morgana*: Allocated SW, Prep course May 2005

*Donnalee*: Application approved, awaiting course date.

*Tracey H*: Awaiting course date and visit from Family Placement Officer

*Nerys (lochness)* Sent in forms for adoption and going to info evening about fostering

*Pam (saphy75) * Sent for info pack on adoption

*Carol *(allineedisamircale): Currently doing home assessment (not sure if Carol is still posting?  )

*Jo *(jolene): Course completed, awaiting allocation of SW (not sure if Jolene is still posting?  )



Karen x


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## Guest (Nov 16, 2004)

Hi ladies,

I have a few questions / disorganised thoughts  that I was hoping for some advice on.

We have just had a BFN with ICSI and plan to try again in March. Whilst I'm trying to stay positive about this, I am also aware of ticking clocks...

Whilst I am only 31, my dh is 47. He has a child from a previous relationsip.

We are both white, I'm a Brit who grew up in Australia and now back in London. DH is half scottish and half Polish. We're both fit and healthy.

Apart from dh's age, I'm not aware of any other factors against us.

My concerns are:

1. Can we start this process (which I know is a slow one) whilst still trying ICSI?

2. Will dh's age count against us?

3. I live in London and as a Social Worker myself I am aware that most children placed for adoption in London are black or mixed parentage, there are few white infants and social services place chidlren with families of the same ethnicity. Has any one else addressed this? We would be delighted with a sibling group but would prefer under 3's.

I hope you can help me with some of these questions.

Thank you  

ali


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Ali to answer (and apologies if it is brief as just become adoptive mum)....

1) No.  You must have a "break" between tx and adoption.  Some Social Services say up to twelve months most say 6 months,

2) No not at all, but the Social Services may want to limit the age of the children you can apply for, but best to ask.

3)  Most Social Services areas work in a consortium so if they cannot find children in their area, they would work with another.  Equally you can apply to be considered for any children in the country through the Be My Parent Magazine produced by BAAF.

Hope this helps....


Good luck
Love
Karen x


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi ali

i am new to all this too but i have spoken to the duty sw who deals with adoption in my area and she told me they like you to have finished fertility tx for 1-2 years ideally before they will consider you as prospective adopters but also she said they will judge each case on its merits.

good luck

pam xx


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## donnalee (May 21, 2003)

Hi ya Karen,
Surprised you have time to do the list 
A very busy and happy bunny.

Just to say ,that we went to prep course, this last week.
So waiting for allocation of SW and HS.
Thinking of you.
Lots of love Donnalee


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Karen
Thanks for new "home" and list. Know you're very busy Mummy now but I'd like to point out that I've finished homestudy and now just waiting panel - early Feb.
Don't mean to be a moaner!!

Many thanks

Everhopeful xx


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## jude2 (Oct 2, 2004)

Hello ladies,

Can I join you please.

Been ttc for 3 years, had one ICSI May this year at ARGC (+ve but lost v early 4 1/2 weeks) and have been recommended new treatment (Humira).  After researching into likely success etc and weighing up against the heartache we have experienced over last 3 years, decided to go for adoption.  Have been posting for a while on Humira thread and had lots of good advice and support there.

Have sent off for lots of info and now awaiting initial chats/visits to decide which agency to go with.  Have already needed to keep my positive thinking head on as all agencies spoke to have been very doom and gloom focussed re type of children (we are initially thinking of 2 0-5s) .  

Also had an agency insisting that one of us would need to give up work entirely until the children were at school.  This is not an option for us:  I am main earner and we could take a cut in salary if I went part time but husband is self employed.  he can't give up and go back in 2-3 years as he would have no clients.  So feeling a bit frustrated at the moment.  Does anybody else have any experience of this or could you recommend a good agency:  we are in SW London/Surrey.

Anyway I know it is not going to be easy but feeling fairly positiv(ish).  Good luck to everybody else.


Love
Jude2


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

welcome jude2

i too am just starting out also wanting to adopt 2 children age 0-5, the sw i saw didn't see it as a problem in fact she was quite positive about it when i told her i wanted to adopt 2 children, maybe it all depends on which area you are in, dont let her get you down stay positive    

good luck

pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi Jude,

our sw initially told us they would not consider assessing people only wanting 0-5 but would assess us for 0-8. So we decided we would consider this age group. And after we'd been on the preparation course we were convinced that we really would. It was really informative, and changed our minds on lots of issues. So the only advice I'd give you is keep your options open, get assessed and then decide exactly how you feel.

good luck, and keep posting to let us know what you decide,

XRuth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

it really must make a difference where you live because on the form i just filled in it give you the option of ages 1-4 and 5 years and above, so strange how different agencies have different rules.

pam xx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Hi Jude

As Ruth says keep an open mind, we said we wanted at least one boy and now have our two daughters!

Some children's circumstances necessitate a parent being at home but if like me you have no choice in the work thing then make that clear and they can match you accordingly.  

Some Local Authorities work in a consortium so you can be matched to children from within that arrangement from other areas and there is also the Be My Parent magazine produced by BAAF that once approved you can apply to be considered for any of the children in there.

Good luck for your journey and I'll add you to our list.

Karen x


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi 

i was wondering if any one knows of any 'must reads' about adoption, i would be very gratefull of any advice,

thanks

pam xx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi 

me again  

i was wondering if there are any books out there on adoption from a males point of veiw as i think it would really help my dh to read how other men have coped at various stages of adopting (my dh will kill me if he knows i've written this   )

thanks

pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi,

I've yet to have any success in getting my DH to read anything on the topic. It's not that he's not enthuriastic, he just doesn't feel the need to read up on the area until we closer to it being necessary....I can't decide whether he's beiong pragmatic or lazy....but I have my suspicions   . 

But there are some really interesting books "parenting the child that hurts"....there are two of these one for toddlers and one for older kids....both were very interesting. The other interesting read is "the adoption experience" by ann morris and I know some of the others on here have read that too and really enjoyed it. It give lots of true life stories from adopter and adoptees, from male and female perspectives, so that would probaly suit you both.


xxruth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

thanx ruth

i'm going to have a look on amazon for the books,
as for getting paul (my dh) to read them i'll keep leaving them lying around and i'm sure he'll take the bait    (probably when he thinks i'm not looking)

pam xx


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## Pooh bears mummy (Jul 11, 2004)

Hi everyone

An update from me, I have got a letter from our new SW today to say he is coming round to visit us on Tuesday   . I am v happy and hope to be back on track with our home assesment soon.

Mandyxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Mandy - great news that you have heard from the Sw, good luck for Tuesday

Pam - I only read The Adoption Experience by Ann Morris, which I would recommend, all the other books I've read have been childcare one's.

Nic - welcome, even if you are only dabbling a toe in at the moment!

There has been a sad story regarding adoption on our local news tonight.  A three year old boy as been killed, allegedly poisoned with salt by his adoptive parents because adoption didn't live up to their expectations.  Why didn't they ring up SS and say it wasn't for them, poor little mite  -   RIP little one.

Another busy day as it was X's 1st birthday today so we have been over to see her, brought most of her presents home as they will be coming over anyway in the next couple of weeks, she's kept a few though.  Eldest is teething something terrible at the minute back one's both sides and can't keep her hands out of her mouth, dribble everywhere.  She's sleeping well and Daddy has put her to bed for the first time and changed her (well I put the actual nappy on to show him, but he did the rest!)

Off to indulge in a glass of vino, my first since becoming a responsible parent.

Bye for now
Karen x


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

Karen, that is a horrible story!!  I cannot believe that people could be so cruel, the poor little mite probably thought that he'd found parents who'd love him and look after him after his previous painful experiences and then then go and poison him, I can't say what I'd like to do to people like that.  .  As you say may the little one rest in peace.

On a more cheerful note, glad to hear that the birthdays went well and that Rich is getting the hang of the nappy thing, you keep him working on it girl  .  I'd forgotten about the teething dribbles, so attractive aren't they?


Mandy, glad to hear you're back on track, it won't be long and you'll be finished and at panel.

Pam, like Karen I can recommend the Ann Morris book as it is full of stories from people who have actually been through the process.

Nic welcome to the thread but fingers crossed that you don't have to join us because your IVF works out.

love
Cindy


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## LB (Sep 24, 2003)

Hi Ladies

do you mind if i join you on this thread.

dh and i decided to give up tx and move on to adoption - a move we both expected if we are truthful and a move we are both happy with.

We are booked for the prep course in January and are really looking forward to that.

We are hoping if all goes well to adopt two or three children between 2-6 ish - SW's that we have met so far have been really amazingly supportive and we feel lucky about this. 

looking forward to sharing all of our journeys and adventures with you all

LB
X


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

LB

Glad to see that you have taken the plunge and have joined us on here.  I will add you to our list.  Keeping everything crossed for you.

Cindy - the story was in all the national papers today too.  Its the court case now but he died some time ago.  They had his siblings placed with them too but they didn't think he was bright enough.  She ended up going back to work before she had agreed she would and did so the day after he went to hospital.  As you said I would have to censor what I would say are my thoughts on people like this.  The frustrating thing for me is that given that this is in the news, we still have not had anyone from Social Services on X's side out to visit since her placement or introductions, not that we would ever do this.  Our SW has been out but she is there for us and does not do the child side, although she could clearly see that she had settled in very well and was calling for me and responding to me.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hello everyone!

Welcome to *LB  * and *Nic  * - best of luck to you both in your journeys.

*Mandy* - brilliant news for you! best of British for Tuesday - hope the meeting goes really well!! 

My journey has absolutely flown past, so you should've find it too bad once you've started! Hopefully there'll be a few of us reporting about our family happenings this time next year!!


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## bex32 (Sep 18, 2004)

good luck to you all on your adoption journey... we really enjoyed the experience, as long as all the meetings go to time etc...as ours did then the pressure is far less than infertility treatment.. i would be happy to answer any questions and have a chat...... Karen is a fantastic support i hope i can help you all too.... just ask away... loys of love and luck Becky xx


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## Jayne (Jan 26, 2003)

OMG!  Just read your post about that poor wee boy Karen.  Well I'm in floods!    Can't believe how utterly cruel some people can be!  Can't put into words how I feel about those sick people who did this to him - language not appropriate for this site.  But that poor little boy.  OMG!  I can feel the pain in my heart just thinking of him.    

Jayne x


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## *Kim* (May 5, 2002)

Oh God thats awful Karen.

I agree why didnt they just say it wasnt working out. Poor little boy. They deserve all they get i'm sorry but when it comes to child cruelty it makes me so mad.
There is a story in yesterdays paper about a woman who went to spain and left her children, i havent read it yet cos it makes me so mad, i just know what Paul said.
The other thing that gets me is programmes like Wife swap when they have small children, one even had a baby and they go off and leave them for 2 weeks. I just cant understand how they can do this.
Anyway rant over.

love Kim x x x


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hello All,

this is just a thought so please don't be annoyed with me for sharing a different view point.....I couldn't agree more that the case of that little boy was absolutely tragic, but maybe we should wait for the verdict of the courtcase before damning the parents to hell. I'm not saying that I think they are innocent, but it's just such a strange case. How many admission in hospitals are there everyday with toddlers swallowing stuff they shouldnt....any how easy is it to feed a toddler something they don't want to eat....salt poisoning is just so odd don't you think??

And all kids get knocks and bruises......I guess I'm just cynical of what I read in the newspapers....their sole agenda is to sell papers and make money, so they'll put whatever spin they want on a story to do that.

I guess I'm also mindful of those cases where the mothers were believed to have killed their children when actually they died of SIDS. I can't think of anything worse than imprisoning someone wrongfully for killing their child.....they will aready be in so much pain.

I hope this doesn't cause any offense, but I felt it I wanted to say something

XXRuth.


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

Ruth, you're perfectly right, a person should be judged innocent until proven guilty and papers do tend to sensationalise.  I suppose it's such an emotive subject and some of the things that the father allegedly said about the child, eg calling him a vegetable seemed so wrong.

Welcom to the group LB.

Mandy, hope things are going well today.

Well I went to my old volleyball club's Xmas ball on Saturday which was really nice.  They presented me with a cuddly giraffe as a congratulations for getting approved present.  It's so cute I'm loathe to share it with any future children  .  

Hope everyone else is well.

love
Cindy


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## Pooh bears mummy (Jul 11, 2004)

Really great news. 

Our SW came round tonight and we are re starting the assesment straight away   , so we go on holiday on saturday and then when we come back we are having 3 visits prior to christmas and then we have booked in 5 for after christmas and the plan is to go to panel in March. I can't tell you how happy I feel as this is exactly what I had hoped for.

Our medicals are also fine, with no problems at all. He has took our CRB check forms tonight.

This has really mad me sooooooo happy. the only thing is he wants to look round the rest of the house asap,ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! so that means lots and lots of housework and DIY ekkkkk.

Oh well.

Chat soon Mandyxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

FANTASTIC NEWS MANDY

I'm soooooo excited for you

as for me i still haven't taken the forms in  my dh told his dad on sunday we are planning to adopt and he thinks it's great news but also said there's no way they will let us adopt until the renovations on our house are finished as we are using our second bedroom as a kitchen until our extension is finished (which should be a couple of months time) and the hall way and utility room are bare brick in places, plus the bedroom needs a new floor and decorating, omg when i write it down it sounds such a lot of work  anyway we have decided my fil is not qualified to make that decision so today i'm going in armed with my forms and i'm going to arrange an appointment for a sw to give us a home visit and let the sw decide if she thinks we should wait, sorry to go on again  but i'm determined not to fall at the first hurdle 

good luck everyone

pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Dear Pam,

I can't imagine they'll make you wait for the assessment. probably if it's not finished by the time you are ready for placing they might wait, but the home assessment is all about you and your DH, not your actual house.

We've been on hold cos we've moved house (haven't actually moved in yet....*&%$ solicitors! ) and we plan to put an extension on the back while we're being assessed and waiting to be matched.....do let us know what your SW tells you in case I'm being naieve.

XXRuth.


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Congratulations Mandy, that's great news.  There will alot of you going to panel around the Feb/March time then.  Don't worry about the house part way through our assessment our bathroom sprung a leak and we had no dining room ceiling for about 6 months whilst the bathroom was replaced and the source of the leak found.  It only went up the weekend before we started visits with the girls.

Pam - don't worry about the house, provided it is habitable for you and the children when you come to be placed then you will have plenty of time to sort everything out.

Ruth - I hope the moves happens soon and I know what you mean about solicitors, adoption can be like that at times, you want things to move quickly, but it is in someone elses control.

Bye for now (have a pooey nappy to do!)

Karen x


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

thanks ruth and karen, i think my problem is i scare to easily   but i'll ask the sw anyway and see what she says and let you know ruth  

hope you get moved into your new house soon ruth

karen enjoy the nappy change   

pam xx


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## Tonga (May 13, 2004)

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this thread but have been lurking and reading your stories for the past few months.

I just wanted to say 'good luck' to everyone and let you know that you will all get there !

I adopted my son three years and 3 months ago now, when he was just 3 months old !  It has been the best thing we ever did.  We underwent fertility treatment over about 5 years, and finally decided that we'd had enough and then went through the adoption process.  The assessment took approximately 9 months (from initial meeting to panel), and our son was placed with us 7 months later.  We were so lucky to get him.

Karen and Bex I know just how you are feeling right now.  It is just such an amazing feeling to stare at these children and know that they are really yours !  I love my son with all my heart and it feels as though he was meant to be with us.  We have just started to talk to him about adoption which is quite a scary thing to have to do, but it's something that has to be done.

We are just about to start the approval process again to get a sibling for our little boy.  We've had our medicals, police checks and references done - but are awaiting our first home visit (apparently we should only need 2-3 as they obviously know us well now).  Trying to adopt again has not been easy !!  My advice to anyone who wants to adopt more than one child is check the situation out with your Local Authority to make sure that when you are ready to adopt again, they will be happy to approve yo again.  Despite the fact that we were approved for two at outset, we've had a battle to get them to agree to approve us again, so just make sure if you are going for one and would like more, you make this clear at the start.

Anyway, enough from me - I just thought I should post as I have first hand experience of how wonderful adoption can be and thought it was selfish not to share this with you all.

Love Tonga xxx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

after lots of foot-stamping it seems we'll be moved in in two weeks. It's amazing how quickly documents turn up out of nowhere when you threaten to pull out of a sale.

My lovely cat Rocky has been in cat-prison (a cattery) for 4 weeks now and we've been with my PILs....who are lovely, but we are slowly going mad! At least there is light at the end of the tunnel now though. And then we'll be back on track with the social workers and adoption. 

xxruth


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## loch_ness (Mar 31, 2004)

HI everyone

I just want to let everyone know that we won't be attending the fostering information evening tomorrow night.

I have decided it maybe to soon after the IVF in april and miscarrying in August. I think it proved it yesterday when someone annouced a pregnancy at work, and it really up got to me.

I will book another information evening in the new year, i will keep you all updated on what i am doing.

good luck to everyone

nerys


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Good Luck Nery with what ever you decide.

Don't put yourself under too much pressure though.....I'm fully committed to adopting but have not put off the idea of having one of my own one day.

Have a good relaxing christmas and let us know what you decide.

XXRuth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

ruth

congrats on getting your new house sorted, it always amazes me too how things suddenly move soooo fast when you put your foot down  

good luck 

pam xx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

nerys

just take things at your own pace hun, you have been through a lot and it will take a bit of time for you to feel strong again, but you WILL get there hun and when you do we will all be here to help you along your journey to adoption/fostering

take care

luv pam xx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

I finally plucked up the courage to take my form in to the fostering/adoption services, but they were very busy so i only managed a quick chat   i never got chance to ask about the works being carried out on my house, but the good news is ...........

they will look at the form on monday, then someone will hopefully phone me to arrange a sw to come to our house to discuss things with me and dh, then we can decide if we want to go ahead (like thats going to take me all night, not ) and also the sw will decide if she thinks we are ready to be put forward for the prep group in the spring (fingers crossed) hopefully i should hear from them before xmas but it all depend on their case loads so now it's more waiting   soon i will be an expert at waiting   right off to go do some cleaning up now while i'm still in the mood  

take care

luv pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

That's Great News Pam!

where abouts you live? We're in Oxford, but I'm from Dublin. It'd be good to have someone going through the stuff the same time as myself to chat with.

XRuth.

PS isn't waiting fun!


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi Ruth

I'm in lincolnshire, a small village on the edge of grimsby.

it will be great to share this journey together to have someone who is going through the same as us, we can moan at each other and pick eachother up if things get a bit tough 

I'm so excited now i know we are doing the right thing and i just want to get on with it   (patience is not one of my virtues   )

i feel we are so lucky and now even better coz i got a ff buddy to share my journey with, thanks Ruth  

luv Pam xx


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## jude2 (Oct 2, 2004)

Hi Ruth and Pam,

I think i am a bit earlier on in the process.  Trying to find best agency.  2 local authorities said they could not have us as we were too nearby (i live in SW London and a small borough) which obviously could cause problems if you bumped into birth family.  Am waiting for a call back from voluntary agency and 2 other LAs.  they are supposed to be arranging for a SW to come and speak to us about it, but of course they are not very quick off the mark!


At the moment I am feeling quite wavery:  very positive one minute and then the next very worried.  Am I normal?  I suppose my main worry is about type of child we might get.  We are trying for 2 under 5s but I think probably older end ie. 3 and 5 rather than 0 and 2, as most unlikely to get a baby in London.

My husband is very positive but he has not read as much about it and potential problems in later life as I have.

Would be nice to keep up with you:  I hope that we might be able to start prep groups in Spring as well (assuming somebody calls us back!).

Love
Jude2


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi jude

sounds like you are not very far behind me at all, i also am trying to adopt 2 under 5   it will be great if you keep up with ruth and i, it's so nice to have people to share with isn't it the more the merrier i say  

the only problem i've got is we don't have a name on this thread, the cycle buddies all have names and i think it would be nice if we had a thread for us ladies where we can get to know each other better and have a good chat. hope i haven't offended anyone as this thread is great the way it is but i'm greedy i want 2 adoption threads   

luv pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

we can come up with a name of our own.....  

can't think of anything witty just at the mo.......no change there then!  

We could have a graduation system with different levels that you graduate from after you reach a certain milestone: maybe a pre-panel, a post-panel and a post-matching? Nothing to stop us getting involved with all the other threads, just make it easier for new people to come along and find their level??

I'm probably being too school-maam like here! 

What do you think Karen.....youre the boss after all!

XXruth.


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

ps Jude, I think if you didn't question your decision lots of times you would not be being realistic. It is a big job we're taking on, but we'll do great jobs when we get there!

It's possible that our children will have issues relating to their adoption that follow them all through their lives, but all parent have anxieties about the problems their kids will have. There's no guarantee that a child born naturally to you would not have problems, at least we'll be prepared and have lots of support should anythign go wrong.

XXRuth.


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## jude2 (Oct 2, 2004)

Hi,

Thanks a lot for your messages.  I also think it might be a good idea to have different stages as to be honest I felt a bit bewildered when I first got on here as to where I should go.  I used to post in ARGC girls and Humira board as i was going to go for another cycle with scary immune treatment, but decided not to go through with it.

Do any of you use adoption UK message boards?

I think maybe because there are so many people on there the 'conversations' never seem to go anywhere.  They all seem to be very one issue focussed e.g. working and adopting, age of children etc.  They are useful, but not very friendly in a way.  

By the way, I have got a really good book called 'the adoption experience' by ann Morris.  Found it on amazon second hand.  it's really made it seem understandable.  have any of you seen 'be my parent'?  I sent off for a trial copy but it seems to be taking a while to come (par for the course it seems!).  

One thing I wanted to ask was about childcare experience.  Do either of you have experience with looking after children?  I have a younger brother who was born when I was 14 so looked after him a lot when I was younger, also a niece who is my god daughter, plus friends have kids who I babysit for.  but I get the feeling that this will not be considered good enough, according to what some people say.

One more thing to worry about anyway!


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi jude

i never even thought whether i needed to have experience of looking after kids and no one has mentioned it to me either, i thought they would give you any training that you need so i wouldn't worry too much.

i'm quite lucky because i have got 6 nephews and 3 nieces also my mum remarried and i have a step sister and step brother that are quite a lot younger than me, they have all mostly grown up now though the youngest being 10, i also have a godson age 5 and a god daughter age 3.

since i was 11 i have been surrounded by children and babies. but i still think i will need as much help and advice as possible when i have children placed with me. 

take care 

luv pam xx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Hi Everyone

I'll split our list up into those categories as it will help to determine who is where, a bit like the tx threads with cyclers and 2ww'rs etc.

Given the intial limited numbers (I was the only one for quite some time) on this thread and the irregularity that people posted it was easier with just one, but open to your suggestions and as our Mod will change this to make best use of the boards.  I'll devise a poll/thread for everyone so they can share views.

Jude - re:childcare experience, don't worry.  We couldn't evidence direct care of children for any significant period of time e.g. overnight stays etc, so they sent us to a Social Services nursery and got us working there for the day being observed.  That then went into our portfolio along with statements from friends to support our application.  I have the Ann Morris book too, a good read.  I've also now got my Dr Miriam Stoppard Complete baby and childcare book!  

Also don't worry about the type of child, as you get to make stipulations about the circumstances by which you and your dh could parent a child.  Just because you are approved does not mean to say they place you with any child in the age bracket, there are a whole raft of things that they consider.

Pam - good news about the form.  Hope you hear something soon and can get on the journey.  Feel free to ask any questions.

Ruth - good news on the house.  Hope it all goes swimmingly and your feline friend can soon join you in your new abode.  Can understand the "In laws" thing too, we did it between both moves, last one being us buying their house!!

For those of you that are fairly new to the board, can I please ask that you are as discreet as you can be about the approval process in your posts as with the boards being public we would not want the information to get into the wrong hands and make vulnerable children even more vulnerable - I know that sounds melodramatic but you just never know.  If in doubt please IM me nd I can clarify that way. Thank you.


Karen x


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## Ann (Mar 21, 2002)

Firstly CONGRATULATIONS     tO Karen and Bex I have just spent the past hour reading your stories it is so amazing and I cant believe how happy you sound.  I have not been online for the past few weeks and I just cant believe how much has happened!!!!!
We have some great news too.................. We had a phonecall from our social worker this morning and she came out to see us this afternoon to tell us...............WE HAVE BEEN MATCHED       to 2 little girls xxxx is 3 1/2 months and her sister xxxx who is 14mths we are in complete and utter shock.... we did'nt expect it to happen this quickly! we picked up our new 6 seater yesterday and finished the toy room on Mon so it is perfect timing.  Hopefully they will be moving in in thr middle of January  we are both on  and cant stop smiling.

I hope everyone else is ok it is great to see so many people posting on this thread now - one day soon I will get to spend some more time on here!!! or not with 2 little girls to keep me occupied!

lots of love from a very tired but ecstatic ANN xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

wow congratulations ann, thats fantastic news hun, i'm over the moon for you xxxx

thanks karen, i know you are soooo busy at the mo with your little girl, sorry i didn't mean to create more work for you   i just get carried away sometimes   so just yell at me if i step on anyones toes.

luv pam xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Congratulations Ann!! Enjoy your last ever christmas as a carefree couple......hopefully this is our last one too!

Thanks Karen for sorting out the new threads. 

I've tried a few times ot get on the Adoption UK message board, but my computer never lets me on?? 

The Ann Moris book is really good, and Me MY Parent.....I wait every month for mine to come through the door. My DH thinks I'm a bit mad, but it really helps me keep my faith when I see so many kids in there that I would be honoured and delighted to have as part of my family.

XXXRuth.


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Ann

That is absolutely fantastic news, (similar age gap to my two), so I know you are going to have your hands full.  I bet you can't wait.  Have you had any timescales yet for when you will meet them (I am assuming that they are already freed?).  can't wait to hear about this next part of your journey.  You could be on similar timescales to Cindy with her match.

I'll be back later have  and in the meantime will think about how we can structure the boards will all the newcomers.  Just don't want too many threads for me to keep track of.

Bye for now
Karen x


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Following recent feedback please find the revised list split into various categories, please let me know if I have anything wrong and I will update it. it is so hard to keep track with everyone (nad motherhood can send your brain like mush!)

* Post matching *

*Karen *: Approved at panel on 22nd April. First little girl moved in on 8/11/04, second little girl moving in on 7/12/04 

*Bex *(Bex32): Approved at panel in April. X moved in on 8/11/04 



* Post Panel/Awaiting Match *

*Caroline W*: Approved at panel in September, now awaiting a suitable match.

*Cindy*: Approved at panel on 27th October 2004. Now awaiting a suitable match

*Ann*: Approved at panel on 4th November 2004. Matched to two girls, possible move in date in January 2005.


* Waiting for Panel Date *

*Everhopeful*: Waiting for panel date (early Feb?)


* Home Study/Prep Course *

*Ruth*: Currently doing home assessment

*Ang* (Molly 2003): Course completed awaiting allocation of SW

*Mandy* (MSW): Starting home assessment in January

*Nat* (Crazy): Currently doing home assessment.

*Kylie* (Boomerang Girl): Allocated SW. prep course Jan/Feb 05.

*Homer & Marge*: Prep course September.

*Nicola *(NickyDuncanFinn): Prep course January?

*Nicky*: Currently doing assessment

*Shannis*: Prep course starts 2/9/04

*Morgana*: Allocated SW, Prep course May 2005

*Donnalee*: Prep course complete awaiting allocation of SW.

* LB *: Prep course starts in Jan


* Initial Stages *

*Tracey H*: Awaiting course date and visit from Family Placement Officer

*Nerys (lochness)* Sent in forms for adoption and fostering

*Pam (saphy75) * Sent for info pack on adoption

* Jude2 * Sent for info pack on adoption

* Nic (Hopingforbaby) * Currently considering the adoption option 


* Oh where oh where can they be! *

*Carol *(allineedisamircale): Currently doing home assessment (not sure if Carol is still posting?  )

*Jo *(jolene): Course completed, awaiting allocation of SW (not sure if Jolene is still posting?  )


Here's the link to the poll I've set up, not many options I can think of but welcome to suggestions...

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,18637.0.html

Karen x


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi karen

the list looks amazing, thankyou soooo much

i have voted we stay with one thread after all now as i think with the new list it's easy to see where we all are, plus i think it woud get way to complicated to split us up into sections

luv pam xx


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## SueL (Mar 22, 2002)

HIya

Just wanted to congratulate Ann on being approved as a mummy and your dh as a daddy.  Sad that you have to be "approved" because we know that you'll be fab!  Still -they just have to make sure your gorgeous children end up with the perfect mummy and daddy    You've got a lovely early christmas pressie and when they arrive - what a start to the new year!

Love Sue
xxxx


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## Jayne (Jan 26, 2003)

Ann - CONGRATULATIONS! to you and your dh.  Hope it's not long now until you have your girls home with you     Fantastic news! 

Love 

Jayne x


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## TraceyH (Apr 14, 2004)

Karen

Just to let you know that we have been allocated places on the next Preparation Course in Feb 05.  We were reserves on the Sep/Oct but did not manage to get on.  We have been allocated a SW and had a letter to say that a Family Placement Officer will be visiting us in due course.  

We already know our SW fairly well, as he has been dealing with my adoption papers and has managed to obtain copies from the file.

Really looking forward to getting started.  This site is so insirational, I am so glad that we decuded to pursue adoption.

Great idea about splitting the threads up.  I don't know how you find time.

Tracey


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

ANN

SO SO PLEASED FOR YOU, CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MATCHING.
YOU'RE GOING TO BE A MUMMMY!!!     

Karen, I don't know how you find the time, just think another week and then you're going to have two little girls running around the house.  I bet you can't wait.

Glad to hear everyone else is well.
love
Cindy


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi Karen,

I don't mind how it looks really....i voted for seperate threads, but it's not that big a deal, especially if it creates lots of work for you.....if you need any help feel free to ask.

xxRuth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi girls,

ruth hows the move going  any news of a moving in date yet ? good luck it will be great to get your own space again xx

jude hows the agency search going, any luck finding one yet  xx 

karen how are you ? when does your second little princess come home ?? you are going to be a busy lady   hope everything goes smoothly hun xx

bex hows it going ?? are you ready for the best xmas ever 

tracy congrats on being accepted on the feb prep course hun xx

a big   to everyone else

well todays the day they will look at our forms and hopefully i should hear something in the next couple of weeks (depends how busy the sw's are) we are really hoping to get on the spring prep course, but i'm sure the sw will do what is best.

 for now take care 

pam xx


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi girls

Glad to hear everyone's getting on so well. I thought we were (and probably still are), until I heard today that our SW is on sick and could be for some time. We haven't been told officially so we can't really go asking any questions, but just worried that this will jeopardise our expected panel date. We currently waiting to see our Form F (if it's been completed), so because we haven't heard anything, it could mean we'll be delayed.
Any thoughts?


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## jude2 (Oct 2, 2004)

HI Pam,

Thanks for message.  Not much further forward but we have been invited to an open evening on Thursday by Catholic Society.    Trouble is not much notice and husband is really busy but they aren't doing another one for a couple of months.  Think I will persuade him to go.


Sorry to hear your news everhopeful.  I am a complete novice at this so can;t really help but maybe you could ring SS and ask them about it?


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## jude2 (Oct 2, 2004)

Oh yes and I forgot to say I am not bothered really about the threads either, I think maybe you shoudl do what you think you can manage best Karen:  as you say there aren't that many people on this thread.

I can't work out how to vote, shaming though it is to admit it!


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## HHH (Nov 13, 2004)

Hello everyone

Nothing to add just wanted to say HI.

Have been following thread for a week or so just wanted to join in.

Had intial visit from SW a couple of weeks ago. All went well and waiting to hear about next stage. She said next courses aren't until MAy/Jun2005 so a long wait for me and impatient DH in store!

Any advice on what we can do in the mean time to further our cause or just keep us from going stir crazy?

HHH


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## morgana (Aug 31, 2004)

Hi all,

Just popping in for my message board fix.

Ann, fantastic news, keep us up to date on whats happening

Welcome to all newbie's, toe-dippers and lurkers...the more the merrier.

Karen, you've been busy with the board structure, anything goes for me. Great to hear both birthdays went well, bet you cant wait to get the littlest princess home. (will you ever get time to get on here then...lol) 

Bex, sorry to hear x has had a few slippery moments...thats kids for you. If I had a pound for every kid who came into the hospital after falling at that age I would be a very rich woman.

No big news here. We are definately on the May prep course with our LA and on standby for the March one if anyone drops out. Had a bit of a panic cause my hubby is in the forces and there is a chance that he might have to do a 6 month tour in July next year. Our SW wasn't too bothered though, she said if it goes ahead then they will just start our home study a bit earlier and get a lot of DH stuff done before he goes.
The upsetting thing is that our panel date would then be pushed over to 2006 if he goes, where as if he doesn't then if would prob be late summer/ early autumn 2005. Ah well!!

I have now been off work for 10 weeks following the car accident and was really upset that my physio thinks that the damage to my shoulder might be permenant. Although I can now do most things it aches like crazy by the end of the day which is why I havn't been on here to much cause typing aggrevates it. At least the car is fixed now though...wish it was as easy to fix me....yes doctor I would like a new shoulder please, what have you got in stock....lol.

ANyway, got to go, bed calling, great to here everyones news, puts a great big smile on my face. 

Morgana xx


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi,

will be moving before the 16th (we hope!). We're just trying to keep busy like going home (Dublin) this weekend to see my new nephew. We were supposed to be going there for christmas but can't now cos of the cat and house delays........got a bit teary about it all last week, but mostly PMT driven! I do hate being such a victim to my hormones! People say those sorts of things get better after you've had a baby.....so does that mean us (potential) adopting mums stay bonkers for ever?? 

We had a long wait between initial visit and starting prep coursew (december-may) it was a real pain, but it flew by in the end. We did thing slike hod our holidays in that time to have something else to focus on and then we'd know it wasn't there to get in the way when we'd start the home study.


Everhopeful, that's a shame about the delay, but surely you've every right to ask formally what is happenig don't you??


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

forgot to sign off last one

XXXRuth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

I just got off the phone to my SW, we are going to see her on Tuesday 7th for our initial visit to get all the questions out of the way and hopefully she will put us on the spring prep course (fingers crossed) I'm so excited   

Ruth great news on your moving in date, sorry you can't get home for Xmas Hun, but hopefully next Xmas you will be too busy with your own little angel xxx

HHH the waiting is the worst thing isn't it. i think we will have to wait until April/June time for our prep course but will hopefully know more on Tuesday xxx

Jude cool let us know how Thursday go's Hun xxx

everhopefull so sorry your SW is sick, i would phone them and ask whats going on and how it will affect your panel date xxx

Morgana our la only run 2 prep courses a year, 1 in spring and 1 in autumn so I'm really hoping to get on the spring one, if not I'm going to search around for another agency, hope everything works out and your DH doesn't end up going away xxx

right I'm off to get dressed now coz lazy me still in pj's  take care

Pam xx


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## Mummyof2 (Jul 31, 2003)

Hi everyone, I am just starting out on the adoption route.  Been to an open evening in October and then had an office visit with our local authority in November.  We have been told at our office visit by the SW that we should be having a home visit in December and going on preparation course in January 2005 but waiting for dates for those at the moment.

My friend adopted a one year old boy in July and he is gorgeous.  Can't wait to get my own adopted child.

We are extremely lucky to have our own natural son but after three miscarriages it seems we can't have another child unless we adopt so here we are, starting on that journey.

Looking forward to sharing my journey with you all.

Best wishes

J


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## LB (Sep 24, 2003)

Hi Jennifer 

we are matching you step for step and are going on course in January

it will be great to compare notes

hi to all the girls on this thread

LB
X


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## helenb (Oct 30, 2004)

Hi everyone!

After 3 1/2 years of ttc, we've decided to go down the adoption route rather than start IVF.  Have got info from LA and Catholic Society and we hope to go to the Information Day with LA 17th December.  Am so excited that I could actually be someone's Mum!

This thread, and everyone on it, is so inspirational!  May all our dreams come true.  

Helen
XX


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## Ann (Mar 21, 2002)

Hi Everyone,

There are so many people on here now - i need to write down what everyone is up to!!!!

We have had a great weekend and we are still on cloud 9  , We have been busy finishing of the 2 bedrooms in time for our new arrivals - pink curtains and new carpets!!! and we even managed to go out and look at buggys on Saturday which is something we have only dreamed of doing before now.  We have got a visit from the girls social worker on thurs to plan the next few weeks it is all so exciting. This is the first Christmas in 4 years that we have got something to be happy about and we are going to make the most of it.

I hope everyone else has had a good weekend

lots of love ANN xx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Firstly Sorry for my lack of posts and time to post this week.  we are currently doing preparation visits with X's sister with her due to move in next Tuesday, so not around much.

Firstly welcome to Jennifer and Helen, I have added you both to my next list to post.  I hope you find your journey goes smoothly, good luck to you both.

Ever - sorry to hear that your SW has gone sick.  The kids Sw has gone sick and they are currently not meeting all of their statutory visits to them so I've spoken to the team manager as there was someone co-working their case but we've seen hide nor hair of them either.  Just keep at them and hopefully they will be able to gather everything together for you.  You shouldn't have to suffer because of their absence.

Morgana - hope dh doesn't have to go away and you can attend the course.

Ruth - hope the move goes well and have a good time in Dublin with your new nephew

Pam - keep those spirits up

LB - great to see you posting here.

Ann - I bet you are having so much fun, shame they can't be with you for Xmas but at least you have the new year to look forward to.  I can't wait to road test my double buggy as I have been borrowing a friends old single one until X's sister arrives.  have fun with all the prep.

Cindy - hope all is well with you, enjoy those last few adult only nights out, it soon goes!!

Well if I have missed anyone sorry and again my apoligies if I am conspicuous by my limited posts this week promise to be back as normal as possible next week, well as normal as you can be with two small kids!!

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Mummyof2 (Jul 31, 2003)

Thanks for the welcome everyone.

LB - it will be great to be going along together 

Karen - thanks for adding me to the list.  I have read through your journey with interest and would like to thank you for taking the time to write it for others that follow.  It is very reassuring to have someone's personal experience to follow.  I am very lucky in having a friend nearby who has adopted so I can ask her but many people are not so lucky.  

Sorry for no more personals yet but I am still working out who is who 

Best wishes

J


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi,

what you were saying about social workers reminded me of my youngest brother. He was fostered by us straight out of hospital and is now 19, but his social worker was supposed to visit him at least every 6 months......we didn't see a single social worker for 15 years until my mother notified them that herself and my father were seperating, and then they were out every 2 days making sure little-bro was coping with the seperation well!

So, if you think its bad here.......the situation in ireland is obviously a lot worse! They don't actually have many domestic adoptions because a child cannot be put up for adoption if his parents are married, so they go into long term foster placements instead. 

XXRuth.


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Hi Girls

Well we've had our visit today and X is a bit jealous that the attention is shared, we are hoping she will react better when the visits are on our turf but we will see. Although I want X to move in as soon as possible it also has to be right for her sister, as we have already got such a good routine and bond built up. I raised this point with my SW on Monday as I didn't feel there was sufficient time for visits at our house and for X to accept that her sister is going to be living here. As such they've now changed the visits and delayed her moving in date until Thursday 9th. I think it is much better for all concerned and after all it is only 2 more days. The girls case has now been taken on by another SW (the team manager) as she is none too impressed with how it has been handled, so surprise, surprise things are now happening as they should be.

I also wanted to post to share a poem with you. X's (youngest) foster mum also has an adoptive daughter of her own and has this poem together with a painting of her daughter in her lounge. I love it so much I wrote it down today and wanted to share it with you. I know some of you soppy lot will have tears at this so I apologise now if it brings a tear to your eye 

*Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone, but still miraculous my own.

Never forget for a single minute, you didn't grow under my heart but in it*​
Speak soon
Love
Karen x


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## LB (Sep 24, 2003)

Awww Karen 

that is really lovely and you are right it did bring a tear to my eye - mmmm must be one of those softies 

Pleased things are happening as they should be - two days isn't long and as you say if it is better all round for everyone then that is the main thing. 

good luck for next week
LB
X


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## *Kim* (May 5, 2002)

Awww Karen yes that is lovely.

love Kim x x


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## helenb (Oct 30, 2004)

That's lovely Karen!  Hope all your visits with X goes well.  

We have our initial information day on 17th December.  Feel excited but a bit scared.  Have just finished reading "The Adoption Experience" by Ann Morris - compulsive reading, I couldn't put it down!  Did anyone else feel excited but a bit daunted by it all? 

Take care

Helen


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

awww Karen that poem is beautiful hun. thanks for sharing it, made me   though

luv pam xx


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## Mummyof2 (Jul 31, 2003)

Hi Helen, yes I definitely feel excited but daunted by the whole process but am hoping that as it is logical steps that it will soon move along.  I shall be doing it one step at a time to make it seem a smaller task.  We are waiting for our home visit and I know that we have to pass that before being able to go on the preparation course in January and we have to pass that before going on the home study so I shall be breaking it up into those steps.

All the best to you

J


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## Jayne (Jan 26, 2003)

Karen - That's a lovely poem and yep, I had a tear    

Love 

Jayne x


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## Fee (May 8, 2003)

really lovely - I hope you and fm don't mind, I've sent it to my God-daughter's mum to put in her memory book
Fee xxxxxxxxx


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## LizzyB (Mar 25, 2003)

Karen ~ thats really beautiful........good luck with X,

Love and luck to all on here, Lizzy xxx


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## Pooh bears mummy (Jul 11, 2004)

Hi everyone,

Just catching up after my week away. 

Hello to all the newbies, I will have to print of the list to remeber where we are all upto.

Karen, thanks for doing such a great job with the thread, as you say one will be eaisier to manage and with the front list it helps to see who is at the same stage as us. I am now undergoing the home study again and hope to go to panel in March. Good luck with x's move on Thursady.

Ever, sorry for the delay, if i were you give them a call and push push push, as you Know with me, i don't let things lie and it has paid off in the end  

Ann, your post brought a tear to my eye, you are going to have the best new year 

Looking forward to sharing my journey with you all, we are getting to be a nice size group now.

Next SW home visit on the 14th, yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. 

TTFN Mandyxx


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## Ann (Mar 21, 2002)

Hi

What a lovely poem Karen, we have told it to so many people this weekend!! Hope you are well and the visits are going well - I cant wait to start ours  
This is just a quickie as I have to leave for work in 5... I only have 9 more working days untill I keave I still cant believe.  Hope everyone has had a good weekend and you are all starting to feel christmasy we have our tree up but no decorations on it yet!

lolts of love ann xxxxxx


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## Nats (Aug 22, 2003)

Sorry its been so long, I have been checking the thread and what everyone is up to....but you know how it is!

Karen- You have done such a fab job of the board, even when you have had so much going on in your life...I hope  that X's move goes well and im sure that everything will be fine and you will wonder what all the worry was about. Its so lovely for us to be able to see and read about what the future may hold for us!.

Mandy- I just wanted to say how delighted I was that you managed to get underway on your homestudy again.....what a great Xmas present for you. You will be going to panel a bit before us, we are due to go the beginning of April. She is applying for a date at the moment........and our next visit is 15th !!!. She thinks we have about 3 more to go before we are finished. I must say that I have really enjoyed ours and I feel that I have even learnt more about myself too!

LB & Helen- Wishing you all the very best for you journey...hoping it isnt too long for you!

Jennifer- Just wanted to say a special "hello" to you.
I used to post on the babycentre board with you when we both went through IVF. Im sorry to hear of loss....anyway hope you remember me!!!
I was Scatty Nats.

Oh well, I guess I had better get some work done, even though we saw our SW last week, we had some more homework sent to us which we got Saturday and we have just over a week to do it, so need to make a start on that.

Hi to anyone I may have missed...

Natsxx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Hi Everyone

My eldest is still asleep bless her!!  So I am taking the opportunity of a quick fix.  The visits are going well this week and we can't wait for X's arrival on Thursday.  Things are settling down between the two of them and we just have the usual sibling issues to deal with i.e. always wanting to play with the toy that your sister has.

It's been a bit quiet on here for a while so I hope everyone else is ok.

Nats good to hear from you again and glad the home study is going well for you, I found it a real educational experience too.

Mandy - so glad things are moving for you too and roll on 14th

Ann - great feeling isn't it!  I completely switched off to work and in the last 5 weeks I can honestly say I've only thought about it a handful of times.  My staff are coming out to visit me next week and then I am going in the following week.

Best go have some photos to print off to put in Xmas Cards and print some parcel labels.  At least I've got the ironing and washing sorted already this morning and Xmas pressies were wrapped last night.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## HHH (Nov 13, 2004)

Karen

What an exciting time for you! Wishing you all the best for thursday.....
even I'm excited to hear how things go!!

Look after yourself
HHH


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

Hi All,

I'm back from a hectic weekend in Dublin and am knackered! It was really good though. Little nephew was tiny, cute and grub-like.....as expected! Older nephew feeling a little pushed out of the limelight, but we did our best to make him feel beter about his little bro. Met up with my 6 months pg bestfriend, and all in all am delighted to say that I did not feel even a tinge of regret or disappointment, cos next christmas we'll both have children to buy for.

Looks like we'll be exchanging contracts on house this week, but keep your fingers crossed for us!

XRuth.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

hi girls

Karen i'm so excited for you and can't wait to read your posts about your 2 little princesses and how they settle together (if you get time to post that is  ) good luck

Ruth so pleased you had a good time in Dublin, love your positive attitude. fingers crossed for you on the contracts

our appointment with the sw went really well (despite dh getting stuck in traffic and being 10 mins late  )and we are booked on the spring prep course     hopfully it will be in march but they will let us know when it's sorted out 

ttfn

luv pam xx


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## LB (Sep 24, 2003)

Wow Karen you are sure going to have your hands full - just what you have always wanted 

Hope things go really well for you on Thursday - looking forward to hearing about your two little darlings

take care and enjoy every moment

LB
X


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Hi everyone

It's been ages since I've been on, some many newbies - welcome to all of you!!

I've finally heard from my SW today. They are back from sick and back on the case! To be honest we've been in a slight panic over not hearing anything and the worry of delay. It's the most irritating thing to know how helpless we are, we've done our side of the bargain, now it's out of our hands. Still haven't had a confirmed date for panel but they are going to do their best to get things done in time . I'll defo feel more relaxed when we know it's definate. I don't feel like we should have to wait another month if panel date gets deferred. But hey ho, what can we do?! Just sit tight and keep everything crossed they get their finger out!!! I know to them it's just a job, and just a month, but to us we've waited a lifetime already, we can't stand another wait!!! Sorry!! Moan over!

On a lighter note, assuming we do reach that panel date, we've only got 10 weeks  Arrrggghhhh!!!! Help!!!
Exciting though!!!!!!!!! 

Best of luck to Karen for Thursday. Hope xx's homecoming is just as special as your first little girl!!!

I'll be in touch soon x


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

Hi Girls, just a quick visit, things are really hectic at work at the moment and the whole Xmas thing is beginning to make life a bit manic.

Karen, hope you have a great day tomorrow welcoming xxxxxxx home.  It's going to be the start of a great new life for you, Rich and the girls filled with the wonderful things you're already discovering like squabbling over toys, extra washing and ironing   .  Only kidding, things are going to be great for you this Xmas and we all can't wait until we're in your shoes.  I'd heard your poem before and I truly believe in it's sentiment.

Ann, I bet you're going to float through Xmas on that  .  Not long now.

Ever, pleased to hear your back on course, only 10 weeks to go.

To everybody else, sorry I haven't got time for personals, but glad to know that everybody is on their way, one way or another.

I'm continuing with the adult distractions until we hear about the Court case in January.  Going to Bolougne with my Mum at the weekend to do some more Xmas shopping.

Have a great weekend everyone.

love
Cindy


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Hi Folks

Well our eldest is sleeping soundly and it is our last night with just one child!!  We are both excited and anxious about tomorrow but even more excited about Xmas.

I've been planning how to synchronise both their routines to make it easier for everyone and have come up with a solution, but just need to test it.  Had a mad panic today as the eldest fell down the stairs (and on a day when Social Services were coming out).  My heart was in my mouth and there was little I could do as I had the youngest in my arms, I went to grab her but suddenly thought I could drop the other.  She only cried when she realised her sister was crying, which was probably because I shouted with the sheer panic.

It is very quiet on here at the moment I suppose you are all busying getting ready for Xmas and planning how different things will be for you all next year.

Sorry for no personals and apologies if I am a little absent after tomorrow but we'll see how things settle down.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x


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## Dee (Jan 27, 2003)

Karen,

Good luck for tomorrow ... enjoy every second of the day your dream is finalised and your whole family is with you.

Loads of love to you and yours
Dee
xxx


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## Pooh bears mummy (Jul 11, 2004)

Hi everyone.

Karen, I hope that tomorrow goes really well  . I will be thinking of you all.

Ever, glad you are back on track, 10 weeks    I am sure it will fly by.

Cindy, have a great weekend away with your mum, i think you enquired about our cottage, i will post you a leaflet tomorrow. 

I have a a bit of a bad week  after the 1st day back at work blues on Monday, I crashed the car on the way home on Tueasday!!!!!!!!!!!! Don't laugh but a sheep jumped out infront of me   , the poor sheep came of the worst but my poor little car is in a bit of a statetoo, and I am very sore   so i will be laid up for a few weeks now untill xmas, so it will be no dancing on the tables for me this weekend for my birthday, Oh well it could have been worse.

Our next SW visit is next tuesday but i am not planning on telling them. Thank goodness i have already passed my medical 

I hope everyone else is all Ok.

TTFN Mandyxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

awwww mandy you poor thing   hope you are ok hun get plenty of rest 

pam xx


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

New home girls

May all your adoption dreams and wishes come true......

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,19240.0.html

Karen x


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