# The Adoption Chat Thread 2011 Part 1



## Boggy

New home for you ladies. I've locked the Prospective Adopters Thread and the Approved and Waiting thread and made this a general Adoption Chat thread so you can chat here along with those who have already adopted. 

Happy chatting  

Bx


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## crystal4314

hi everyone  
I have my info meeting on friday- can anyone give me an idea of how many other people might be there, and also some good questions to ask? Do you have to talk about yourslves to the whole group?

hope everyone is well!

something I forgot to add: since starting this process, has anyone found themselves alot more irratated by people talking about adopting mums as 'not the _actual_ mum' and 'not the _real_ mum'? A girl at work was talking about a friend of mine who is adoped,and said that about her mum, in the whole 'its the familes guilty secret'  sort of way


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## Pink Lady 66

crystal4314 said:


> hi everyone
> I have my info meeting on friday- can anyone give me an idea of how many other people might be there, and also some good questions to ask? Do you have to talk about yourslves to the whole group?
> 
> hope everyone is well!
> 
> something I forgot to add: since starting this process, has anyone found themselves alot more irratated by people talking about adopting mums as 'not the _actual_ mum' and 'not the _real_ mum'? A girl at work was talking about a friend of mine who is adoped,and said that about her mum, in the whole 'its the familes guilty secret' sort of way


Our info session was very informal it was a presentation from a few Social Workers on the process and what type of children they are looking for homes for, there were about 20 people, couples and singles and there was no talking about yourself etc it was very informal at the end you had the opportunity to talk 1 - 1 with a Social Worker about any issues etc you might have had and then they asked if you would like an initial home visit which we did, and home visit was about 10 days later, Good Luck we went to ours 20 Jan 2010 and was approved last week 6 Jan 2011 so I thought quite quick.


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## galaxy girl

New home!! 

Sorry - can't add to the info meeting as we didn't have one. Hope it goes well though.


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## aaa is a MUMMY

hi everyone and thanks for the kind words, we didn't hear from SW yesterday so hoping she might have some news when hubby does his ASI on Tuesday.

crystal our info evening was the same as LP very informal, we had a mum there who spoke about what it was like the highs and lows and she stayed back to talk to people as well as the SW's as well. Hope it all goes well

sorry bit brain dead at the mo and can't remember much from the last thread dah x


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## Arrows

Just bookmarking.
Crystal, similar to the others -lots of info, a few games. We introduced ourselves to one another too. There were about 20 people there.
We're a much slower LA though as we went to our info day in July and haven't even started our home study yet. They said 8mths from start of home study to get to panel too, but I know that other LA may get things done a lot quicker 4-6mths from start of home study.


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## Anjelissa

Also just bookmarking.   

Have a good evening all x

Anj x


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## popsi

just marking.... love following your journeys xx


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## KG81

Just marking

Karen x x x


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## eknowles

hi ladies new home yeah!! 
hope you are all having a great weekend 
em xx


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## Mrs Dibbles

Just popping on to bookmark. Hope all are well and had a nice Christmas and a Happy New Year. 

Just waiting for that phonecall now to say they have a match for us. 
Having a two week break in the sun.    Flying out to Singapore and Malaysia later today. We figured it would be our last big holiday with just the two of us for a long time so we thought we would splash out. Hopefully it will be all sand pits and paddling pools later this year!!!

Health and happiness to all

Mrs Dibbles


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## sweets x

Hiya peeps.
Sorry have been awol, still wating on insrance people so still no internet so on my phone. Have been reading but can't look back on my phone to do personals, sorry. Hope u all had a lovely christmas and new year. 
Were trying to sort house out best we can for our photo's for panel, gonna have to do some trick photography as most rooms affected. 
Take care.
sweets x x


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## panorama

Sweets - didn't know you had flooding, poor you!   

Mrs Dibbles - done that trip before and it's fab, enjoy your last holiday just the two of you!!   

Arrows - hope things get moving soon for you!    Well done on your teacher training! Sorry it was hard for you but will also be nice being a godmum   

GG - can't wait for feb now! How exciting you will probably go to panel same week as us!   

Crystal - some people should think before they speak!! 

Another weekend gone, less than a month to go now! Woo!   

p xx


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## sonia7

Hi Everyone

Hope you all had a good christmas and a happy new year. Congrats to all those who have intros and home study and prep courses.

I have some news - I have adoption panel TOMORROW (10th Jan 11), we received the letter during our christmas break but havent been able to let you know as we don't have the internet. As you know we are having an extension done which is being completed tommorrow and the builders accidently cut through the internet wire. So at the moment I am using our next door neighbours  computer and internet.

Hope you are all okay, will keep you informed of the outcome
from a nervous Sonia x


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## MissSunshine

OMG Sonia! Good luck, that is such great news. You and DH will be fine. Let us know how you get on!

Happy New Year to all you beautiful ladies. Here's hoping 2011 is the year that make all your dreams come true.......   

Love, Rhonda.XxX


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## panorama

Good luck Sonia - looking forward to hearing your happy news!!  Hope you get internet soon! x


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## sweets x

Sonia- good luck for tommorrow x x x


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## crystal4314

good luck sonia


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## Moppit

Just marking our new home! Meeting today to review intros before taking poppet home fprever we hope on wednesday! Mxx


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## Moppit

Ps huge luck to sonia i know you will sail through!!


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## Anjelissa

Hi all,

Just wanted to say....

Good luck Sonia for today   

Good luck to Moppit for Weds, not long now! it's such an exciting time!   

Luv Anj x


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## liveinhope

Good luck Sonia for today.  We have no internet at home at the moment, so sneaking on here from work   

We have our SW visit on Thursday, so will be cleaning house from top to bottom before then. Yes I know she probably wont look everywhere but it will make me feel better

Lots of love all
xx


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## vickie10

Hellooooo, confused me a bit then finding the new home lol

Im so tired! Intros are going amazing, day 7 today and foster carers brought princess to us for a few hours, so its been an eaiser day for us.
Ive got a viral infection now so i will admit i am struggling a little but i am not letting it set us back thats for sure!

We have took her out 3 times now, 1st time we went to a super market for dinner, other 2 times we had her most of the day! Shes amazing with us, not a whimper at all.
Tomorrow they bring her here again and leave her, then we take her back after tea/bathtime routine which i think may be a little confusing for her, but we will see.

to be honest we are finding these intros very tiring with the traveling every day, leaving home at 6:30am and getting home at 8:15pm ish. 
our review is on Wednesday and all being well placement day is on Friday.
We have ourselves a propper daddys girl though lol but she gave me a kiss today for no reason which was nice, i was just sat on the floor taking the skin off an orange for her and she just randomly gave me a kiss   she wouldnt give me a kiss goodbye today though. 

hope everyone else is doing well


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## GERTIE179

Happy New year everyone - heres to a prosperous 2011 in many ways 

Vickie / Moppit - your tales of Intros give me a warm fuzzy feeling.  So glad they are going well but fully understand how tiring they must be too.
Sonia - good luck for Panel tomo
Mrs Dibbles - I've done Singapore/Bali trip before and it's fab.  Also one of my friends lives in Singapore and she thinks it wonderful place.  Very clean and safe.  Jealous of Malaysia though as would love to go 
Hello all to eveyone else i have missed, just catching up with your stories.

AFM - SW got our detailed application today (after xmas/NY break) so just need to wait SW beging allocated from our local authority and then dates for when home study can begin.... excited.com!!  I have held off telling my mum/close friends until we get the dates for home study in case its a very long wait for LA to get back to us but now wondering whether I should say anything??  Just not wanting to deal with the whats happening now Q's   

I've been looking at things I can get started just now and big new year clear out is on my list of to do's - honestly don;t know how i have accumulated so much stuff!

Luv Gertie x


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Sonia hope it all went well today xx

Moppit and Vickie yeah must be amazing go cold (in a good way) everytime I read your posts x

LIH sure it will all go well on Thurs I am sure there isn't anybody on here who hasn't turned the house upside down before a visit! 

Gertie good luck with the new year clear out, when you are done can you come and do mine for me LOL 

Hope everyone else is ok xx


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## skyblu

Sonia hope it went well today - thinking of you.

LIH - I know how you feel,  we have our first home visit tomorrow, I spent all weekend clearing the house out lol.
Even the dog had a good brushing, I just hope to God he behaves himself(he is a little excitable!!).

AFM - I am really nervous and excited about tomorrow, wish me luck ladies as I think I am going to need it. 

Skyblu.xx


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## Pinky3

Hi Ladies - not been on for ages but....

We have been approved for adoption!! 

Hope you are all well x x x 

Sonia - hope to hear your good news soon


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## sonia7

Hi everyone

WE HAVE BEEN APPROVED TO ADOPT, WE ARE GOING TO BE A MUMMY AND DADDY.

Lots of love and lots of Thankyou's for all your support

Love Sonia x


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## liveinhope

Congratulations Sonia and Pinky - hope your wait is not too long
xx


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## sieve

Congratulations to everyone who has been approved.  Gosh it is so hard this waiting....!   i check my home phone, mobile and email about 10 times a day just in case i have missed that call   Soooo.. in limbo cos there's not much we can do other than have a neutral room ready!!  sw on leave till next week, hopefully she will have good news for us on her return


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## panorama

Sonia & Pinky - great news!!!!!!! Congrats!

Sieve - hope you get the call soon! Must be so hard waiting! My SW says after we hopefully get approved next month she will come and see us about 10 days later with any potential profiles the LA have, but it can all take time depending on whether you then express interest etc. You will get there! Hopefully soon, hang in there   

p xx


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## sieve

oh thats interesting panorama, i must ask my sw if she will do something similar.  
you will get approved at panel.    I never really believed everyone when they said you wouldnt get put to panel unless they were sure you would be approved, however now that we have been i can see they were right.  we only got asked 3 questions as they said we had done so much work beforehand they had most of the information they needed.  so look forward to hearing your good news


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## panorama

Thanks Sieve, my sw seems quite confident of our application so hopefully a formality!   

Less than 4 weeks now, very excited! 

Hope you hear something soon!!!


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## skyblu

Well done Sonia and Pinky, you must be so happy. 

AFM - had my first home visit today, I think it went o.k.

I had a student and a sw and they were both really nice.

I have got a feeling they are going to say no for now as I started to cry a little when they asked about the faild ivfs and the 2 m/c. I swore to myself I was not going cry but hey I am only human I just hope it does'nt go against us. 
Other than that it all went well, the dog behaved and they dont think my endo will be a problem.
I will find out if we can continue in about 2/3 weeks.
I'm going to go mad with the waiting, fingers crossed all will be well 
Skyblu.xx


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Skyblu fingers crossed hun xx

Pinky and Sonia Congratulations fab news xx

Sieve hope you don't have to wait too long maybe your SW was waiting until she was back so you didn't have details and then have a wait x

Hope everyone else is ok xx


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## Pinky3

Skyblu - please dont feel bad for crying, me and DH blubbed loads to our SW - it shows you are human


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## panorama

Skyblue - I blubbed a bit too, and had to get my DH to take over for a while as I was choked up a bit (talking about my son) - this is perfectly normal, like Pinky says it shows you are human and will be able to empathise also with what children have been through   It didn't count against us at all. good luck!


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## Cars

bookmarking so i can keep up with all of your journeys xx                        lots of love cars


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## libby29

Welll our second home study visit is done and i think it went really well, fingers crossed. Just finished our written profiles. I've been very honest about somethings that happened in my childhood and now worrying i've been a bit too honest. Nothing too horendous but worried that these things could go against us. I've already e-mailed it so can't re write it now. It consisted of my mothers depression and her taking an over dose when i was younger. She's fully better and has been for years but i'm panicking now. xx


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## Anjelissa

OMG Cars!!!!

I just noticed that you got a BFP in Dec!!!    

HUGE CONGRATULATIONS to you!!!!!!

Love Anj x x x


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## sieve

Wow Cars congratulations - isn't that amazing!

Libby don't panic at all, i like you was very honest about things in childhood and various issues that included a type of mental illness.  i had to write a bit more detail about it before the panel as the Medical advisor wanted more info.  they didnt mention it at panel but in the feedback after they commented on how i had to overcome a lot and it proved how resilient we both were as a couple.  it was definitely brownie points that we were honest and were able to write about it and if required speak about it.  so honestly dont worry


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## crystal4314

sorry I haven't kept up with this thread, been a bit of a scatter brain lately!  Info meeting is fri, getting a bit nervous about the chat with the sw, as is DH. Not like hm to be nervous!


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## emma.b

Libby29- Just wanted to say not to worry about being honest with your SW. My Dad commited suicide when I was 18 so we have explored how I coped at the time and how I feel about it now. I have also written in my PARS form about how this experience can help me empathise with a child e.g feelings of rejection, loss etc and how it has made me more resilient as an adult. I'm glad that your Mum came through it and is no longer suffering x

AFM- We had last day of prep course today following two being cancelled due to the snow. Unfortunately DH couldn't attend this one as he is away with the forces. It is frustrating because he was able to go to the two that were cancelled. I hope it won't be a black mark against us!! I have a home visit from the SW next Weds which will be the third one. We have a panel date of the 12th July which is very exciting but we may have to wait to be matched til the following year due to DH having a six month tour abroad. Does anyone else have a DH in the forces or who works away for long periods??

Emma.b x


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## libby29

Hi emma. b and thanks for your reply and sieve, you both put my mind at rest. So sorry for your loss emma! As for your hubby working away, my hubby does too. He isn't in the forces but works away 50% of the week. They said that this isn't going to mean its going to be a huge problem but will be something we will have to talk about and as long as i have a good support network they are happy. It is not perfect that our hubby's works away but the fact is its their jobs and very important jobs at that. Does your hubby get adoption leave? If he does this can start if i'm right 2 weeks before a child is placed so the forces will have to follow these rules like every other employer i'm sure. Google it sweetie! xx


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Libby I have to say I agree with the others honesty is the best policy, it shows you have had life experiences and will give you some insight into these things so don't panic hun xx

Emma sorry can't help but hope you can get some answers soon.

AFM hubby had his ASI today all went well and they are happy for us to carry on so hopefully by the time we get a date for approval we should have some more news from the hosptial so pleased I was really worried they were gonna stop us massive relief and    Just a quick question do the individual visits count in the 6-8 homestudy visits


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## emma.b

Hi Libby29- Thanks for your reply. Our SW's dad was in the military so he is very understanding which helps alot. We have a good support network with my Mum and step-dad living in the next village. My DH will get adoption leave and we are hoping this will be tagged into his post-operational leave, he gets five weeks off plus adoption leave so will be home for two months to help the children settle. Hopefully panel will see this as enough time for him to make a good attachment with them. Do you have a panel date?

Always an Auntie- I'm not sure whether the individual interviews are included. We have had two visits as a couple and Dh has had his individual one. I have mine on Wednesday. We then have two more appointments booked for Feb and two for March. That makes 8 but there may be more as we don't go to panel until July. I think the number of visits varies depending on how much info they need and how many issues there are. Glad you Dh got on ok, sorry but what is the ASI?

Emma.b


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## Moppit

Hi Ladies


Just wanted to log in and say hello to everyone. Its been a huge day for us. We bought our little munchkin home for good today. A very emotional morning saying goodbye to the foster carer - we were all in tears - and then home. All has gone well including getting him down to sleep. Amazingly he went off with barely a whimper although I am sure it won't last and its going to be scary for him when he wakes in the night in a strange room. He has all his familiar bedding which helps and we have spent lots of time in the bedroom getting familiar with it. 


Life is just a whirlwind at the moment but so, so amazing. I can hardly dare to believe that the little person sleeping upstairs is really mine and have to keep going to check he is still there. Its the little things that catch in your throat like looking over at the washing line and seeing small things for the first time....


I know I've said it before girls but wherever you are on this journey persevere. I know it feels like it takes forever but once you get your little one, which you will, somehow all the frustration and waiting slips away and you think to yourself that you would have waited a life time for this little person to come into your life.


Love to you all


Mx


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## crystal4314

Congrats to you moppit!


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## crusoe

Just wanted to congratulate Moppit!

Fantastic news that your little boy s home with you at last and you are a mummy at last. I can't believe how similar our journeys have been.

I remember that first night with our ds so clearly. He went to sleep like a charm and didn't wake until 5.30am. We bought him into our room and he just lay on the bed totally still obviously wondering what on earth was going on and where he was! 
The early weeks are a strange time, keep it low key, calm and relaxed but above all enjoy!!!!

Massive congratulations to you               spin  

Lots of love Crusoe
xxxx


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## skyblu

Moppit and dh.

I bet you are so happy, this a special time grab it with both hands and enjoy 

We have just stared this journey and cant wait to get where you are now.

Best of luck mummy

Skyblu.xx


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## sweets x

Hi peeps.
Hope everyone is doing ok.
Will do personals next visit as on mob. Just wanted to say 
CONGRATULATIONS MR AND MRS MOPPIT     LOVELY THAT YOU ARE A FAMILY AND ENJOY IT X X X X


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## Duckling

Hi everyone,
I had to come on quickly to say *'CONGRATULATIONS Moppit!!!'* I love reading how things have turned out. It gives me so much hope. Again massive congratulations to your new family. xx
Hello to everyone else, hope you are all good.
Love from Duckling. x


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## liveinhope

Had a great 1st visit and Social worker is going to recommend we are accepted on to preparation course  .  Feel so happy - I know there's a long way to go but its the first hurdle gone.

Great to hear your news Moppit, hope all continues to go well
xx


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## Belliboo

Moppit congratulations on becoming a mummy & daddy

Liveinhope great news not long now till your prep course

Hi to everyone else too 

we're just plodding along with our home study sw hopes to get us to panel possibly march we've got another
home study visit tomorrow
Lol to everyone xxx


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## Belliboo

Cars wow congratulations on your miracle bfp fab news

Crystal enjoy your info evening tomorrow


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Emma thanks, ASI is attachment style interview. We haven't been given a date for panel she said she doesn't give dates until they see how things are progressing, she is coming to do my ASI on Tues and then we have a behaviour management course 3rd Feb and then our next joint visit is the 8th Feb that will be visit 5 in total, I am gonna see if she can give us any more dates when she comes on Tues as work need to know as far in advance as possible. Good Luck with it all x

Moppit awesome news CONGRATULATIONS its must be amazing hearing little man alseep I love that sound, I sat for ages listening to my twin nephews when we have them overnight its such a soothing perfect sound. Good Luck with it all and keep us posted when you can.

Hope everyone else is ok xxx


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## libby29

Moppit congratulations mummy! 
Thanks A.A.A  suppose your right,  we all over think everything during home study i guess!
Emma hi, i reckon you'll be fine with hubby working away esp as your sw knows what its really like and not just guessing. As for panel if all goes to plan she has she is putting us down for may. We'll see though as anything can happen, not putting all my hopes on then, panel will happen when its right. Would be fantastic though   How about you? x


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## crystal4314

AAA~ what is the ASI for/about?

Liveinhope~ glad it went well hon  

Rachel~ hopefully march will come really quick for you


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Libby fingers crossed for May x

Crystal it is to see how attached we are to each other and support network apparently they ask loads of questions about various things (hubby has a shocking memory and can't think what they were) but think it was how we deal with things and how we think we'd cope and make friendships etc it is scored by our sw and then collectively with 3 others!  I am really not looking forward to Tues.


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## crystal4314

whoa, scary! Is it standard across all agencies?


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## vickie10

good evening, checking in and giving a huge congrats to those of you with good news! seems theres a fair few so ive got no chance remembering names lol

our review went great on Wednesday, they said Princess is deffonatly ready for placement day to happen tomorrow (friday) 
tonight we took her to her foster carers and we didnt put her in bed, we thought we would let them have their last night with her as they are finding this hard, and she cried when we left!! We felt awfull, but we know thats a good sign really. 

cant wait untill 10am tomorrow when we bring her home at last, we are pooped from all this traveling every day


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## Pinky3

Vickie - wow good luck and enjoy tomorrow x


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## skyblu

Vicki and good luck for tomorrow.
Skyblu.xx


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## crystal4314

Vicki, hope it went well!

AFM~ info meetng was really good, had a talk from a previous adopter as well as the regular SWs. DH and I had a bg chat about it all on the long journey home, and we're both on the same page of trying to get the treatments done asap simply to be able to say 'that's it, we've closed that door', and get started. SWs recommended this too, and say they will wait for us to call them once we're done, and we won't have to repeat info meeting.

hope all are well


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Vickie great news hope today all went well for you all and you Princess settles well, keep us posted when you can x

cyrstal assume its standard but don't know good luck with weight loss and treatment x


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## Kestra

Hi,

I am new to this thread and only posted a few times as we were waiting for our info evening - Wed - to see where we stood as our council have changed the way they do things and we were caught in the crossover as we had a info/initial visit before deciding to have a third and final tx in Sept/Oct that ended in a m/c and our SW wasn't too sure if we could go on the Feb prep course but we got our letter today inviting us to the course on the 16th - 18th Feb so fingers crossed we will be starting our home visits in the Spring!!

I am so excited and over the moon that we are not having to wait to the next course in June.

Congratultions Moppit x 

Vickie - I hope you have had a fantastic day x

Liveinhope - looks like we will be starting at the same time! I am sure the next month will fly past!

Hello to everyone else and I hope everyone has a lovely weekend

Love

Kestra x x


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## skyblu

Vickie, hope today went well and you and your little princess got on o.k.
Keep us posted how you get on.

Crystal, glad the info meeting went well.
Having treatment is a very difficult road and even harder to come off it.
I have seen on your ticker you have been through a few treatments already, you really both need to be sure when you come off that road and then start your other journey into adoption which I'm sure you realise is also very difficult.
I wish you both all the best and I'm sure you will make the right decision for you both.
I really hope that the treatment will work and you and be a happy family.
Take care and all the best.
Big  Skyblu.xx


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## vickie10

we had the most amazing 1st night! i put her to bed at 7:40, and she didnt wake up untill 8:20!


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## skyblu

Ah Vickie, I am so glad last night went well.
She must be very comfy in her new home environment to setell so well.
Keep us posted.
Skyblu.


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## Jo

Sonia and Mark
Just had to come on here and say Congratulations to you both, we are so pleased for you both  

You are going to make fantastic parents  

love Jo, Paul & Charlie
x x x


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## sonia7

Thankyou Jo

Hello to everyone

We are meeting our new social worker tommorrow as our current one was only working with us to get us through panel

Sonia


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Good Luck Sonia with your meeting

Hope everyone is ok and those that have been matched recently hope its all going well x

AFM had my ASI and individual meeting yesterday she was late arriving so didn't leave until 5:45 I was shattered when she'd gone but think it all went ok, she has suggested we start thinking about what we could manage disabilities, illnesses etc and start thinking about how we would get space between us and the child when it is misbehaving as we live in a small flat! So all sounds positive she has booked another 2 appointments with us.


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## galaxy girl

Hi all! my computer hasn't let me on here in days - so now I'm going to try and catch up!
Congrats Moppit and Vicki!!
Congrats Sonia - hope this is us next month!

AAA I am always shattered when SW goes....


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## aaa is a MUMMY

GG pleased your computer is behaving itself now x

Girls I am worrying a bit; don't know why, think it might be cause I am going back to work tomorrow after over 4 wks off so everything is bothering me today. When were you all given dates for approval panel? We haven't been given a date yet but she said originally she was aiming for June we have already had 4 visits and have another 3 dates booked for visits which takes us to 2nd March! I thought the homestudy stage was 6-8 visits am I wrong?


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## Miny Moo

AAA - we had 2 1/2 weeks notice, it was like a whirl wind we had our PAR to read and get back, our SW had to interview our Referee's, but we'd had our last HS visit in the January and did not go to panel until the July, I was beginning to think we were never going to get to panel. On the upside we had the details of our lovely son within 2 weeks of being approved.


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## Cars

AAA- We had about 6 weeks notice, u'll find that SW need to count in holidays etc of their own so dont despair with the wait, it will all come together.


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## galaxy girl

We were told in Dec that it would be Jan - today in fact! But then got put back to feb. It started in Sept. Can't remember how many visits though it was weekly.


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## vickie10

checking in again as promised.

Princess is doing great! her social worker visited yesterday and shes so pleased with how fast shes settled and is really proud of us  They are not used to people our age even enquiring about adoption let alone going the whole hog and they are so proud to say they work with us! i almost cried!!
her child social worker got us a memory book as a gift which is really sweet of her, didnt expect that at all.

Today we went and got her some new shoes, shes got her 1st pair of crawlers tucked away to show her when she gets older, and she came with cruisers as clarkes call them lol, today she got her 1st pair of big girl shoes and she loves them so much she didnt want to take them off, and when i did manage to prize them off her she was carrying them around with her trying to put them on every now and again, shes such a little cutie


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## 02cindy

Hi Girls

I hope I am able to join your thread.  I am just starting out on the adoption journey and ever so nervous but really excited at the same time.  We sent our application of on 20th Dec and allocated a SW who is coming to see us on 4th feb for our initial journey. She said that it could take up to 18months but as there are no approved Black adopters in Essex at the moment, we could be fast tracked.  It has been a long old road to get just to this point, so I really hope I dont have to wait forever. 

I would like to say congratulations to those that have just had their new arrivals, its is so inspiring to hear the positive stories..

Hopefully, we get to know all your names really soon, but so far Vickie10 and Moppit stick in my mind as you guys have been so truly blessed recently.

Cindy. x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

02Cindy welcome to the thread hun, you will get so much support on here everyone is truely lovely. Good Luck with everything x

Vickie wow how amazing bet she looks so cute carryig them around with her, sounds like she is gonna be a shoes girl when she grows up be warned   

Moppit hope it is all going smoothly xx

Thanks to everyone for your answers its amazing how different everyone is. I think I was just having a going back to work wobble and feeling out of sorts yesterday. I saw one of the other ladies from our prep course in town today they have finished HS and she thinks they had about 10 visits! So hopefully we are getting there just my op set us back a couple of wks but all good.

Have a good weekend everyone x


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Sorry have been awol for so long. Were getting things dried out a bit now and have internet up and running again   

O2Cindy, Kestra- welcome to the thread and good luck with your journeys    

Always- How did 1st day back at work go, is always nerve wreaking going back after time off isn't it! 
We were giving our panel date after our medicals and police checks came back, got our letter on the 16th nov, panel is 4th feb.

Vickie- Glad all is going well for you. x

Anj- hope all is still going great

Galaxy girl- hope panel goes well in feb, what date are you there??

Cars- hope your well x

Skyblu- how's everything going for you

Crystal- glad you enjoyed open evening and you feel ready to put closure on tx etc soon. Good luck

Libby- hope your ok

Hi to eveyone else, sorry no more personals but have read back as much as poss, will defo be online more now to try and help out    and chat    

Take care

sweets


----------



## charlie_44

Hi ladies   mind if I join in?  

I've been reading for a lil while and thought I'd take the plunge, been a bit worried about keeping up as I have the memory of a goldfish at times so will end up frantically going back and forth between the pages   

We are starting our prep course this week so feeling very excited but the nerves are starting to kick in now as I'm told they write an evaluation on you after the course so feel they'll be watching my every move!  

Lots of luck to everyone and I look forward to chatting to you all.

Love Charlie x


----------



## sweets x

Hi Charlie, 
I felt like that on prep course too. Everyone did. It was brilliant and after the 1st nerves were out of the way was ok. You are kinda evaluated but not in a bad way. They don't sit staring at you all day lol.
Good luck

sweets


----------



## Duckling

Hi,
Hope everyone is well. Welcome Charlie and Cindy. Vickie, I've loved reading your news - so fantastic! 
We had our first course this week. Found it absolutely shattering and a bit scarey, speaking in front of so many people but dh was fantastic, really feel we're in this together and it's the right thing for us.   
AAA hope work was ok. x Sweets glad things are getting back to normal. Hi to everyone else.
Right better go and do our homework for next week. 
Love from Duckling. x


----------



## Poochie1111

Hi ladies

May I join your thread please? DH and myself are just starting out on the adoption journey.  We had our initial home visit last week which went well.  We can send out application in now although they said they may have to put us on hold until May which would be 12 months after my last M/C.  Just waiting to hear back from them and really hoping we're can get going. 

Looks like everyone is at different stages on here. Looking forward to reading about your experiences.

 x


----------



## skyblu

Poochie,

Welcome to ff, we are at the same stage as you.
The waiting to find out when you can get started is driving me nuts  
I just want to know and move on.

Keep us posted how you get on and good luck.
Skyblu.xx


----------



## Duckling

Hi Poochie and welcome. I agree with Skyblu - the waiting drives me nuts too. Feeling loads better now our course has started. Read back my message from yesterday and thought I had better say that where I come from 'shattered' means exhausted! Thought it might sound like I was devastated!
Lots of luck Poochie, hope you hear soon Skyblu. 
Duckling x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Charlie welcome to the thread you won't be the only one with a goldfish memory LOL I am useless so don't worry everyone on here is great and you will get loads of support. We had an evaulation following our prep course but made me laugh cause we were firstly told it was our course and we could express how we felt and say what we felt and then they told us they were writing a report on us! Our report was very brief basically said we were one of the quieter couples but we expressed valid opinions and worked well on group excercises so nothing to worry about honest.

sweets pleased things are drying out my poor mum and dad have wet floors at the moment they thought it was a leak from the stop cock which was fixed a couple of wks ago but things are still getting very wet so looks like its some nasty really feel for them. Thanks first day back was ok very hard and I am still in quite a lot of pain, in fact at the moment I would say its worse than before op which isn't good! Our CRB checks were done ages and ages ago its just so strange how different every case is sounds like even within the same LA things are done differently I guess we all get there eventually LOL

Poochie welcome to the thread hope you don't have to wait too long for an answer hun x

Duckling don't worry we all knew what you meant, I was so tired after our prep course didn't help cause i didn't sleep afterwards either as it was all going round and round in my head.

Hope everyone is ok


----------



## charlie_44

Thanks for the welcomes   

Sweets - Glad they don't sit and stare   Wow not long till panel for you - good luck wishes.

Duckling - Do you live up north as I know what you meant by shattered   Hope you got your homework done.

Poochie - Just wanted to say hi   

Always an Auntie - I'm glad it's not just me with the goldfish memory!  Thanks for the info about the evaluation    I hope the pain eases off soon.

Skyblue - I think I've 'bumped' into you on another thread recently!  

x


----------



## sweets x

Always- Your poor mum and dad bless em     Really hope they get things sorted as soon as poss, its been totally devastating having our home in such a mess. Sorry your having pain still sweetie, when is your follow up from the op? Can really take it out of you following an op, maybe ring your consultant if things don't start to calm down.   

Charlie- when you starting prep course, will be thinking off you x

Poochie- welcome hun, everyone is lovely on here, so any questions just ask away x x

Duckling- glad 1st session went well. My dh is a bit more out spoken than me and he talked more at the beginning. At the end of our course they couldn't shut me up     . Hope next one is good too x

Skyblu- Bless ya, all the waiting is hard isn't it. Book something to look forward to or arrange a nite out hun x x

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## 02cindy

Hi Girls

Poochie, hello I am at a similar stage to you just waiting for our initial home visit on the 4th Feb.  

Hi Duckling - Hope the course continues to go well. I am quite outspoken but dh thinks he is a joker, but i have told him i will have a code for when he has said something silly or I want him to shut up  

Always - I feel for you and your parents, hope you get sorted really soon.  

Hi Sweets, sky-blu 

AFM - No news here really just waiting for the 4th Feb.  Did anyone read the article in the Daily Mail, written by the CEO of Dr.Barnados about the lengthy wait and unnecessary delays in adoption. they reckon on 3,200 children waiting for adoption and now the average age is 3 when in the 70's it used to be about 1yr old. He says the system needs streamlining!!! You reckon   

Cindy.x


----------



## Moppit

Morning All! A rare 5 minutes without Munchkin as he has gone to the park with Daddy. My DH is still off work and will be until next Monday when real life really begins. I can see that it is alot easier and alot less tiring with 2 of ours and we will both miss DH when he goes back after a month of being together as a family which has been wonderful. Munchkin is still settling in well. He is an amazing sleeper - 2 hours for his nap and I have to wake him up and almost 13 hours at night - he lets us sleep until about 7.45am in the morning which is pretty amazing... wonder if it will last. I have a feeling he is shattered at the moment with all the new activity and attention and alot more exercise than he was used to. We took him swimming for the first time yesterday and he took it all in his stride. I was so proud of him as he had never seen a pool before and we both thought he might freak out but no he was his usual happy self and seemed to enjoy being in the water with Mummy and Daddy! Had to laugh when I was getting my swimming stuff on, he is such a boy. I took my bra off and he pointed and went 'oooooh', hilarious! 


Now for some personals as I've been very remiss at this and you have all been fantastic at supporting me:


Poochie - A huge welcome. FF is the most amazing place and will get you through the long haul of the adoption process. I know it feels like a long journey ahead but I promise there is an end to it and unlike fertility treatment there is a child at the end of it without question. We started the process just over 2 years ago and now have our little one with us and somehow now that he is here it doesnt feel like such a long time after all and is absolutely worth it. Hang in there and come on here and moan or share your news whenever you like!


Duckling - Glad your prep group is going well. I really enjoyed ours. My DH is also quite outspoken don't worry. He had rather bruised shins after our homestudy with all my kicks under the table!


Skyblu - I know the waiting is unbearable. I can remember getting so frustrated that at times I wanted to give the whole thing up and look at other options like surrogacy but I'm so glad I didnt now. Our munchkin is just wonderful and so worth the wait and I promise you'll feel the same. The years of waiting will dissolve once you have your son or daughter in your arms I promise.


Always an Auntie - You are so brave. Hope pain is getting better. Thinking of you.


Hello to everyone else!


My other big news other than Munchkin being here is that I have been invited to attend a roundtable with the Children's Minister Tim Loughton at Westminster next week. I don't know if any of you have been following the adoption news in the press recently but he is putting together a white paper on proposed changes to the process. His big thing is why black or mixed race children are waiting so long to be placed but he is also looking at the process as a whole which is fantastic. A friend of a friend met him months back and mentioned that we were adopters and out of the blue I got an email inviting me to the roundtable. Its a bit scary as its a small group of adopters none of whom I know but a fantastic opportunity to have some input to changes to the adoption process and to be able to get across views on how it could be improved both for the children and for prospective adopters like us. I need to get my thoughts clear and brainstorm with DH to make sure I get everything important across but if any of you have any particular thoughts about things you think should be changed particularly in reference to the approval process for adopters let me know and I can convey them.


Thats it for now. I'll let you know how the meeting goes and of course update you on progress with Munchkin!


Lots of Love


Moppit xxx


----------



## charlie_44

Sweets - we start our prep course tomorrow night   It's just for a couple of hours then we do 2 days next week and 2 days the week after, they said there was too much content to fit in the 4 days.  Getting more and more nervous but I try and calm myself from what you lovely ladies have told me.

Cindy - good luck with your 1st visit.  I was so nervous for ours but it went well.  Just be yourself.

Moppit - lovely to read about your little Munchkin - wow what a fantastic sleeper, long may it continue!

Hi to everyone else


----------



## liveinhope

Wow good luck Moppit - a real opportunity for you to put across adopters views!

We have received confirmation today that we are on Feb's Prep course so looks like its all systems go  

Hi to everyone who posts here, love your stories- makes it seems like it might one day happen for me and DH too!

xx


----------



## Arrows

hi everyone - I swear i wrote 3 days ago but somehow it's not there.

We finally got through out application form so in the process of filling it out and have our final day of prep course on 2nd Feb next week (for newbies, we had to miss last day of our original course to attend a funeral).
Glad things are finally moving forward again as been getting a bit fed up with how static everything has been.


----------



## panorama

Arrows - great news! Always so hard waiting!   

LIH - great news 

Charlie - enjoy the course! I really loved it actually, some difficult issues to discuss but on the whole found it really interesting and the people were lovely.

Moppit - your LO sounds lovely!  Good luck with the roundtable, well done for going!!

Cindy - read the article, so true! Ridiculous that these children are passed from pillar to post before being adopted.

Sweets - not long for you!!!

Run out of time so hello everyone else! Our form has now been sent to panel, only 12 days to go, eeekkkk!!! 

p xx


----------



## thespouses

Finally!

As you may know we're adopting from overseas, your UK paperwork has to go to the agency overseas after approval by the UK government, at long last it is doing that. You can see from my ticker how long it is since we were approved here...

As for what happens now, well, how long is a piece of string?


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thespouses yeah slowly moving foward hope the next step is quicker for you x

Moppit aw that was lovely reading bet you are walking round    all the time. Thanks for asking about me still feeling pants doc has suggested I go back on all the pain killers that I was given post op really don't wanna but got to try it. Keep smiling and posting when you can it gives us all strength x

To everyone else sorry goldfish brain kicked in hope you are all ok x


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

Moppit - Aww i am jealous, every day I have a few moments when I try to imagine what it must be like suddenly have a little one at home.  

Thespouses - I hope your on your way to finally getting some little un's. not sure if I missed it but what country are you adopting from?

AAA - I am sorry to hear that your in pain, I hope the painkillers bring some much needed relief   

Panorama - 12 days in the grand scheme of things is nothing, hun you are so nearly there.    

Arrows, Charlie _44 and Liveinhope - feb is just around the corner, so prep course bring it on.  girls.

No news from me, except to say that every day I feel more and more sure this is so the right thing to do, and sometimes wish I have made the decision earlier.  I suppose that late is better than never.  

Cindy.x


----------



## Poochie1111

Hey ladies- thanks for the warm welcome. It's great to hear that there are some of you at the same stage as myself.  I'm also loving reading the stories about those of you that are new families. Moppitt - you must be pinching yourself everyday.   

Charlie - lots of luck with the prep course.  Hope it goes well.

Cindy - hello. The initial home visit is so nerve racking. I was so nervous beforehand and you've never seen my house look so clean.  You'd swear the Queen was coming round for tea   

Skyblu  - hello too. great that you're at a similar stage as well.

Sweets - lots of luck with the up and coming panel.  Not long to go.

Did everyone find that they started to feel so much more positive about the fact that having your own family will actually come true when you started the adoption process?  I was sat on a train for three hours yesterday and there was a 6 month old on the train.  Instead of feeling upset and bitter like I normally do, I actually felt really good and thought that will actually be me one day...

x


----------



## Moppit

Poochie - I definately felt better about my infertility the minute we started down the adoption track. I think it was the final realisation that we would have a child rather than wondering if it would ever happen. I still find it painful when friends announce pregnancies but as time goes by that pain gets a little less and I realise that if I had been pregnant I would not have been able to go on this journey, learn more about myself, have my relationship be stronger than ever and of course above all else get to be Mummy to this munchkin. I think you have to believe in fate and as adopters we are getting to do something in many ways more wonderful than giving birth. We are going to give someone a good and happy life that they might not otherwise have had. Its this that made me feel good about the adoption journey from day one and it still does. Its like an equation, we all desperately want a child and these children desperately want and need parents. 


Mx


----------



## charlie_44

Hi ladies,

panorama - wow not long for you till panel - sending you luck and good wishes   

AAA - sorry to hear that you're still in pain - sending you   

Cindy - I totally agree with your sig about wanting to be a mammy more than wanting to be pregnant.

Poochie - I definatley felt more positive about us actually being a family once we'd decided to stop the treatment and start the adoption process, I don't feel bitter and upset now by people announcing their pregnancies or seeing tiny babies (i do get the odd blip but i know it's just a blip and i can deal with it). I feel like there's light at the end of the tunnel - though I do keep saying hopefully   as it's hard to think this could actually work out after all the negativty of treatment but hopefully   it will!  

Hi to everyone else, hope you're ok - i'm a bit of a goldfish brain like AAA so I surprise myself I got this far   

We started our prep course yesterday - we were so nervous but once we got there and started it was fab!  The group is lovely as are the SW's running it.  My head was buzzing last night and it was after 3am before I got to sleep.  I can't wait to get back there next week!  We've got a little bit 'homework' to do and a file full of info to read throughout the process.  I was sure before we started it that adoption was for us but this had just confirmed it   

Love Charlie xx


----------



## panorama

Charlie - great that you have started!!    Same for me, once we really started it all clicked into place!

Poochie - yes definitely! Starting adoption is so much more positive than endless tx! I still have my wobbles sometimes too but it is not the same slap in the face anymore both hearing about new pregnancies and also seeing babies etc. I am a photographer and so avoided doing newborns for quite a while but now quite like it!  It is hard to accept that you will never have such a teeny baby but I am so looking forward to being a mummy full stop! And with adoption it is more when than if. Good luck!


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

Poochie - Yes definately, once I made the decision to end tx and start the adoption road, I seriously felt like a weight had lifted off my shoulders. I was quite fortunate that a colleague at work her sister is a team leader in adoption services, so spent some time speaking to her about the process.  I am quite nervous about the home visit as I am a probation officer so a qualified SW so do home visits all the time, feels strange to have the shoe on the other foot..and quite unsettling. 

Charlie  - great that your prep course has started, one more hurdle crossed      Hope it goes well.

Sweets - good luck with the panel, I am sure that it will be fine    

Panorama - Was your user name influenced by your profession? I would love to take good photos, I am rubbish at that.. I agree that at least with adoption you are guaranteed a baby at the end, instead of more heartache..

Cindy.x


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone,
Agree that now we've started I do feel better - I found out yesterday that someone I know is pregnant for the third time and even though I admit I still had a touch of the 'it's not fairs' I didn't feel anywhere near as upset as I once would have. Moppit your post  makes me feel even better about it all.  
Had our second prep course this week. It's great to feel 'normal' listening to everyone else's stories, and not be different for once. Finding them really exhausting though as in the evening after work. Really glad yours went well Charlie - know what you mean about your head buzzing.
AAA - really hope you start feeling better soon, you've had a rough time lately.  
Have to go now, but hello to everyone and have a great weekend. Duckling x


----------



## GERTIE179

Hi girlies   

Well i passed my test!! Went to visit a close friend and her newborn y'day and very pleased that as much as she was very cute, i sat thinking im very pleased with our decision to adopt.  I think i will always have a secret wish to fall pregnant but i dont look at pregnant women and think it should be me   .

AFM just waiting on one LA writing their report to our own LA and await them assigning us a SW for home study.  Feel we are in limbo stage (prep was on 1/2 Dec) but delay has been waiting on all the other couples at prep getting their application forms back so hey ho    Better get used to the waiting I suppose.  Just so excited/keen to get started on HS.

Love to all
Gertie x x


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps
02 cindy- that makes 2 of us looking forward to the 4th...good luck    

Moppit- hope all goes well tomorrow being 1st day on your own, sure you will be fine. Good luck with the meeting.

Charlie- enjoy prep course

Liveinhope- yeah to getting on course   

Arrows- glad things are moving again hun x

Panorama- Not too long hun, is it a week monday...you getting excited.

The spouses- good luck

Always- hope you feel better soon hun x x

Poochie- felt so much more positive once we left ivf etc... behind us. Adoption is not an easy route at all but its so much more rewarding, also, definate too, like panorama says, its only a matter of when not if    

Duckling and gertie- glad things are getting easier 

Can't believe were at panel in 5 days. Is so exciting but scary at same time. To be told we are going to be a mummy and daddy must feel amazing. Just so worried its all going to go wrong. S/w is coming out tomorrow to run through it all and see our photo album for panel. Hopefully she'll put our minds at rest 

Take care

sweets x x


----------



## GERTIE179

Aww sweets - how exciting but fully understand the nerves. U will be fine but will b thinking of u and sending lots of positive vibes your way.
G xox


----------



## Fergux

Hi Sweets,

Just wanted to wish you lots of luck for panel

Hi to everyone else   . 
2 out of our 3 referees were interviewed last week - i think it went OK.... (based on their feedback to us) Next meet with SW in 2 weeks, so i guess we'll find out more then

xxx


----------



## panorama

Sweets - good luck for friday!! Yes our panel is on monday, a week today! Yes quite excited, looking forward to moving on to the next step, seems a bit unreal really!    Look forward to hearing your news! xxx

hi to everyone else!! 

p xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Sweets hope SW helped to put your minds at rest it will be fine hun x

Panaroma not long now yeah, 

Fergux I am sure it has all gone really well, how far into your hs are you?? 

Hope everyone is okxx


----------



## charlie_44

Panorama - only 7 days to go   

Duckling - when's your next date for prep course?

Gertie - I hope you're allocated a SW soon

Sweets - I hope you're SW put your minds at rest a lil today - thinking of you   

Hi to everyone else - hope you're okay


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Gertie, always, and charlie- thanks for well wishes, hope your all ok

Panorama- not too long to wait, 7 sleeps   

Fergux- Sure your referees will be good, roll on next visit x

Hi to everyone else

Well, s/w did put our minds at rest, for a while, now freaking about what questions they might ask us     
I was bullied as a teenager and she said they may ask questions about it. I'm over it but will still be weird.

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## skyblu

Sweets good luck on Friday hun, will be thinking of you 

AFM still not heard from s/w weather we are on the next prep course, they said 2/3 weeks and it is week 3.
How long should I leave it before phoning, my mind says tomorrow but don't want be a nuisance.

Hi to everyone hope you are all o.k

Skyblu.xx


----------



## sweets x

Skyblu. I would give them a ring, sure they won't mind and are used to people chasing them up. X


----------



## panorama

Sweets - only 3 sleeps for you   

Skyblu - go for it, I normally emailed mine, she didn't seem to mind


----------



## Arrows

we got burgled again yesterday. Not much taken -laptop and a phone but this time they broke the patio door getting in using a spade they took out of our shed.


----------



## libby29

Arrows....Thats terrible, i'm so so sorry. What horrible people there are out there it disgusts me. As if you dont have enough going on at the moment. Dont really know what to say to be honest i'm speechless! Big hugs to you hunny xx


----------



## liveinhope

So sorry to hear that Arrows


----------



## waywardstork

Hello everyone.
Just starting on our adoption journey ...
have been to open evening in December and had initial SW visit last month.  Now waiting patiently (ha ha ha!) for the Parenting and Loss Day in a few weeks time. 
Just wanted to pop on and say hello to everyone on here and bookmark this thread.
'Chat' to you all again soon ... 

And good luck to Sweets for panel this Friday!
xxx
waywardstork


----------



## liveinhope

Waywardstork.... you made it! and you are most welcome.  

Skyblu I would definitely ring them if you havent heard.

Sweets, not long now - keeping fingers crossed

xx


----------



## skyblu

Thank you everyone, have decided we will wait until Friday then it will be 3 weeks and 1 day, lol

Thinking of you Arrows 

Skyblu.xx


----------



## Arrows

Doing a lot better today. Had final day of prep course today so at least that's now done and dealt with. SW said they will do the reports from this course in the next few weeks. We are just filling out our formal application form and then fingers crossed we will start home study soon.


----------



## charlie_44

Hi all   

skyblu - we had to chase them up about our prep course and they were fine about it, give them a ring hun it will stop it 'doing your head in'   

sweets and panorama    

Arrows - so sorry hun that's awful   

waywardstork - hi and welcome   

liveinhope - not long till your prep course   

AAA - hope you doing okay and feeling a lil better   

Hi to everyone else, hope all is well   

We have our prep training again this Fri and Sat   I keep having to pinch myself that it's actually happening   as the last few years we've had that much bad luck it's sometimes hard to believe this could work out and we could one day be a family.  

Have a lovely weekend everyone xxx


----------



## libby29

Arrows glad your feeling a bit better today!

Hi to everyone else and hope alls going well.

As for us we've just had our 3 homestudy this week so plodding along nicely. Having 1 every week so helps us feel like something is happening. Last 1 is end of march and hoping for panel in may. So excited that every day we are getting closer to panel. Had a few worries cleared up by sw this week so feel alot more confident now that this might actually happen, i'm now daring to believe that i will be a mummy soon.


----------



## charlie_44

Hi libby - how long does each session last?  Glad it's going well for you


----------



## libby29

Hi Charlie... they last about 2-4hrs. It sounds a long time but it really flies by as you totally get lost in what your doing. We're really enjoying our homestudy and look forward to each one. Does help that our social worker is so nice and really gets what kind of people we are. we were so lucky to get her as we weren't so keen on the one our friends got. How is the prep course going chick? xx


----------



## vickie10

Hi everyone, i feel like ive abandoned everyone since princess moved in, i would appoligise, but im really not sorry lol (in the nicest possiable way of cause  )

Princess is just adorable! shes won the hearts of all family members and also friends, and shes learning to get daddy wrapped around her little finger already  
she is 14 months old tomorrow.
ive read the thread and seen good and bad news, thinking of you all xxx


----------



## charlie_44

Libby - I loved our first bit of prep course, we just had a couple of hours last week for introductions so it's our first full day on Friday - I didn't want to leave last week and can't wait for the next one - though I'll probably get a bit nervous again till it begins!  Glad you're enjoying HS - sounds like it's going well.  

Vickie - congrats on your lovely daughter - wishing you lots of happiness.

xxx


----------



## Poochie1111

Evening all

Libby - that's great you're able to have one homestudy per week - must feel like things are moving for you. I have a feeling it won't be that swift with our agency but I can always live in hope 

Vickie - lovely to hear another good news story. Your daughter sounds wonderful   
Sweets- 2 days to go for you.  Wishing you lots of luck for Friday     

Charlie - good luck for your next prep training session

Waywardstork - welcome aboard.  I'm a newbie on here as well.  Sounds like we're at the same stage

Arrows - so sorry you had to go through been burgled again.  There's some really horrible people out there.   Glad you're feeling a bit better today although I'm sure it can't be easy.

Hope everyone is well xx


----------



## charlie_44

Thanks Poochie - I'm so excited about it all I have trouble sleeping    I hope all is well with you and that you hear some news soon


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi girls sorry I have read all your posts but I am in a bit of  a muddle this morning one of the girls on another thread I post on has died bit of a shock this morning so can't rememeber what anyone said. We are off for our behaviour management course today so need to get my head straight! Will catch up next time.

Sweets if I don't get on before tomorrow, Good Luck not that you will need it x


----------



## Arrows

Aaa, I'm so, so sorry.


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Sorry to hear your tragic news, Always an auntie, thats just awful     I'm also sorry to hear about your burglary Arrows.

As you can see we are back from our holiday now, which was a lovely relaxing break. Have touched base with our social worker who has said there maybe some potential matches in the pipeline but no proper information yet so not getting my hopes up. It's difficult to interpret what she means exactly. I'm off work today so out for lunch with a friend who I haven't seen since before just after Christmas so it will be nice to catch up. Hope all are well. Have tried to read through posts but there are many pages to get through so not sure what everyone is up to. 

Happy thoughts and love to all

Mrs D x


----------



## panorama

Mrs Dibbles - glad you enjoyed your holiday, hope you hear back from sw soon with some potential matches!

Arrows - so sorry you got burgled    Must have been horrible for you, glad you are getting on to the next phase!

AAA - sorry to hear about your friend, so sad   

Charlie - glad prep is going well, I really enjoyed it myself

Love to all, only 4 more sleeps   

Sweets - good luck tomorrow!!!!

p xx


----------



## Belliboo

Aaa such sad news about your ff hope your ok

Mrs singles gals you had a nice holiday hope Your not kept waiting too long

We've nearly finished our home study now sw sending out out draft report & panel is on 21st march just wish I could fast forward time now

Vicki bet it's amazing having your little princess home I can't wait for that day

Arrows sorry to hear youve been burgled hope your ok
Charlie enjoy your prep groups at the weekend 

Hi to everyone else too hope your all ok xxxx


----------



## Belliboo

Sweets good luck for tomorrow xxx


----------



## Belliboo

Panorama good luck on Monday too xxx


----------



## libby29

Charlie... goodluck for tomorrow have a good day!

Poochie....where abouts are you on the A road you?

AAA..... so sorry about your poor friend, thats so terrible!

Arrows.....how are things with sorting out the burglary?

Hello to everyone else and hope your all doing ok! xxxx


----------



## sweets x

Just a quickie as on mob. Thanx for all good luck wishes. So nervous. Always, hope u r ok hun. Hi everyone else x x


----------



## Poochie1111

AAA - that's really sad news.  So sorry to hear about your friend.   

Mrs D - hello & I hope you get to hear some good news form your SW very soon!

Sweets - all the best for tomorrow. Hope you manage to get some sleep.    

Libby - I need to update my signature.  We're right at the beginning of our journey.  We had our initial home visit mid Jan which went well and were told we may have to wait until May to officially start as it would be 12 months since my last M/C.  Just waiting to hear back.


----------



## liveinhope

Good luck for tomorrow Sweets!!


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps. We're approved. We are finally going to be a mummy and daddy. Will do personal later as in pub having dinner


----------



## panorama

Sweets - yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!


----------



## liveinhope

Congratulations!


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Congratulations Sweets, sorry I missed that you were going to panel, but a big Congratulations anyway on being approved!!!!  

Oh and good luck for Panorama on monday.

  Mrs D


----------



## Poochie1111

Fabulous news Sweets!!!!  Congratulations    .  Looking forward to hearing all about it.


----------



## waywardstork

Congrats Sweets..... we all hope to be where you are one day!  Enjoy the celebrations.
Have a great weekend everyone.
xxx
Waywardstork


----------



## libby29

Congrats Sweets thats fab, well done!  xx

Poochie.... we had our initial visit way back in early june and had to wait till the end of nov for our prep due to having time out after ivf. Its a bummer having to wait but may will be here before you know it. We can't believe how quickly last year went. Just hoping this year goes as fast now so we can find our family. Never wanted the months to fly by before as was worried about getting older and ttc, couldn't give to hoots to my ages now woo hoo! xx


----------



## skyblu

Well done Sweets, told you you would be fine. Enjoy your weekend and finally you can both relax. I'm so so happy for you 

Panorama - Good luck for Monday.

Afm - I phoned the s/w today and guess what.....
The manager has been off for a while and has only been back in the office today and she has yet to see our report to sign it off.
Not only that, the prep course for April has been cancelled as there is not enough people adopting in the three counties.
To say I'm p****d off is understatement. God knows when we get things moving now.
Sorry for the moan, but I hope you all are o.k
Skyblu


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Sweets awesome news hun   

Panaroma Good Luck Monday x

Skyblu pants news hun really sorry for you hope the next course is soon x

AFM Thanks for the kind words, it came as a total shock yesterday morning she will be really missed on the thread.
Behaviour management course done phew, was great to catch up with the others on our prep course. I can not believe how differently each case is dealt with, there is one couple who have same social worker and even their process is totally different. So glad we have got our sw cause it is working really well for us the way she is doing stuff phew! Next visit Tues actually looking forward to it now. 2 Birthday parties for us tomorrow gonna be a hard day for me as still can't walk very far and the first one is at the zoo, think i might take a book and find somewhere to hide LOL


----------



## galaxy girl

Congratulations sweets and DH!   this will be us on thursday!

Good luck Panorama for Monday. 
I am starting to get really nervous about thursday now...


----------



## Charlie5

Hi everyone 


Got date for panel 6th April !!!!!!!!


Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

Sweets -  on passing panel.

Panorama -  for Monday.

AAA - Sorry to hear about your FF    its so shocking when someone dies so suddenly and so young...

Skyblu -    that is such rubbish news, I hope that you get to move forward really soon and the wait for another prep course is not too long.

Charlie 5 - Woo hoo for a panel date in April...  

Galaxy girl - for Thursday     

Hi to everyone else, its amazing that we are able to share this journey, and everyone at different stages offering words of wisdom, support and encouragement..  

AFM - We had our 1st initial visit on Friday, the SW seemed nice, said she did not think that there will be a problem with us proceeding to the next stage. I was so nervous beforehand and cleaned the house from top to bottom..She was here for 3 hours and had a look around the house and garden, she also looked at all our photos around the house. She said we should hear in about 3 weeks if we get to proceed to next stage and for the report to be signed off by her line manager..    .  I have been a bit naughty though and see a lovely little boy on a website and I know its crazy but I cant stop thinking about him..  . Have any of you girls done that? and if so have you done anything about it?

Enjoy your weekend,

Cindy.x


----------



## GERTIE179

Congrats sweets x
Sky-blue - sorry for your bad news
GG - good luck for Thursday x
Aaa - hope things get brighter for you
Hi to everyone I may have missed x
Luv Gertie x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

GG good luck Thurs x

Panaroma Good luck for tomorrow x


----------



## Poochie1111

Good luck Panaroma from me as well


----------



## Hun

Just gate-crashing to say

     Good Luck for tommorow Panorama and DH       

I will be thinking of you xxx


----------



## sweets x

Just a quickie tonite as celebrated a little too much last nite and still feel ill lol. 
Good luck for tomorrow panorama and your dh x x x x
Sure you will sail through  xxx


----------



## galaxy girl

Will be thinking of you tomorrow Panorama!!


----------



## panorama

Thanks everyone, looking forward to tomorrow and not too nervous for now! 

Been a mixed emotion weekend as it was my son's 5th anniversary yesterday but hoping february will have better memories for us going forward!   

Be back to report tomorrow!

p xx


----------



## Janis18

Another gate-crasher here to say all the very best of luck for tomorrow Panorama & DH
I'm positive they'll be delighted to say yes!
XXX


----------



## charlie_44

Hi everyone,

sweets -          

panorama - thinking of you today    

AAA - so sorry to hear about your FF   

Mrs Dibbles - hope you hear from you SW soon

Rachel - March will be here before you know it    

Libby - hi, hope all is okay with you   

Skyblu - sorry to hear your prep course had been cancelled   (is there any chance that may chage as that happened to us but then it was on again?) I hope things start moving soon.

charlie5 - great news   

cindy - sounds like your first visit went well   

Hi to everyone else - hope you're okay   

Well we enjoyed our two days of prep course, we were exhausted and brain dead   by the time we'd finished.  We have two more days to go at the end of this week, can't wait!!  It confirms it even more that this is definatley the right direction for us   

xxx


----------



## panorama

Back already! A unanimous yes!!!!!! Woo Hoo!!

Got a bit tongue tied at one point but DH came to the rescue!   

They took all of 30 seconds to get back to us, so happy!!!! spin

Off to celebrate in a bit, back later! 

p xx


----------



## annastacia

Hi everyone!! Bin wanting to post on this thread for a while but tbh I'm rubbish at tryin to remember who everyone is!!! Please forgive me if I repeat myself or someone else  
Panorama..... Amazing!! Well done     
Sweets...Fab news, congrats     
Condolances to AAA  
Gr8 news Charlie  
and a great big "HI" to everyone else xxx


----------



## watakerfuffle

Hi everyone, another one that is useless with names! Feel like I don't really belong in this chat as I am not really on the road to adoption as yet but hopefully heading that way! Have lots of info and a few dates to choose from for an intro day which is very very exciting! I live in an area that is within the catchment for 3 la's so my dh and I are reading up as much as poss about each one before going forward.

Big congrats to panorama, you must be over the moon.  Will have a read through to see what everyone else is upto and try remember some names!


----------



## charlie_44

panorama      I bet I would get tongue tied to!

Welcome annastacia and watakerfuffle


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone, just a quick message. Haven't been on for a while - so much news with you all. Had to come on quickly to say *HUGE CONGRATULATIONS SWEETS AND PANORAMA!!!*    So very thrilled for you both. xxx
Arrows and AAA sorry to hear your bad news. x
Galaxy Girl Good Luck!
Skyblu know you must be really fed up. Could you go with another authority nearby? - know it would mean travelling though. When is the next one - could they tell you?
Everyone else Hi and hope you are good. I must try and keep up. Next prep after work this week. Feels so great to be getting somewhere. Very tiring though as I get so worked up beforehand and mad rush after work  . Agree with you though Charlie.
Bye for now and sorry no personals for everyone. Duckling x


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Panorama-       CONRATULATIONS TO YOU BOTH, 

Galaxygirl- good luck hun x 

watakerfuffle and annastacia- welcome    

Always- hope you are ok hunny x x

Charlie44- Glad your enjoying prep course   

Skyblu-    must be devastating hun, really feel for you, hope its not too long till your on the next one x

Duckling- Enjoy prep group

Hi to everone i missed   
Panel was very nerve wreaking but everyone was really nice. We waited just over an hour to get started, (this is quite normal apparently). The s/w went in 1st, then us and s/w, then we left and went back in for the verdict. The whole thing lasted about 15mins if that    
Well, its starting to sink in, been toy buying today. Which isn't easy when you dont know who your buying for    

Take care 

Sweets x xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Panaroma and Mr Panaroma Congratulations so pleased for you xxx

Hi to everyone else x


----------



## galaxy girl

Panorama - brilliant news!!!

Sweets - toys... very exciting. can't wait to start buying! Have ben doing lots of clearing out of wardrobes and really want to get single beds - but like you don't know what age I'm buying for!


----------



## Poochie1111

Congratulations Panorama - fab news!!!     Hope you are celebrating this evening.

Sweets - best you are still on cloud 9.

Skyblu - sorry your prep course got cancelled.  How annoying!

Welcome watakerfuffle and annastacia!

Charlie - glad your prep course is going well.  Can't wait to get started on ours.

Hey to all   x


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

Just wanted to say  to Panorama, well done on getting through panel. Enjoy your celebrations and we wait to hear all about it patiently.  

Welcome to all the newbies, welcome to your new adoption journey.

Cindy.x


----------



## panorama

Hello!

Thanks for all your messages! 

GG - good luck for thursday!! What a week eh? 

Sweets - wow how nerve wracking to wait so long, they actually had told us 10.15 and we got there early to have a final chat with our sw and they came to get us 9.45!    So buying toys already??!!    We're going to wait a bit until we get the bedroom done, think I prefer to go on a huge shopping spree once we get matched!   

Duckling - hope prep goes well, wow must be hard after work!

Welcome to Annastacia & Waterfuffle!   

Charlie - enjoy the prep, I loved it and like you felt it was the right thing!   

AAA - hopw you are feeling better   

Skyblu - hope things get moving soon   Waiting is so frustrating!

Well yesterday was quite epic for us!  Panel was good, bit nervewracking to have 14 pairs of eyes on you but all very nice and smily. They then went round the room introducing themselves and each picked up on something positive about our application which made me a little emotional! Which is why I had a bit of a blank on the first question!    But all was fine! We then went out of the room and the chair came to see us 30 seconds later to give us the happy news!   

To top it off had a chat with SW after and there are 4 potential under 2's coming up next few months and she sent us one profile already!!!! We need to get some more info on the other 3 as some issues with the first one but OMG!!!! Probably seeing our sw again in a couple weeks to talk through options! We would love to adopt from our LA as they have been absolutely fab and as we're out of area it's quite easy for us to do this. All very overwhelming! But in a nice way!! 

Love to all!

p xx


----------



## liveinhope

Congratulations Panorama - hope the right match comes quickly


----------



## Fergux

hi everyone!

bit delayed i know but Sweets and Panorama - fantastic news!!!   
well done & many congratulations.

Fergux


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Panorama aw thats lovely go cold every time i read about matches etc makes me    

Well we had visit no 5 today she is aiming for panel in May really not sure what we are gonna do between now and then as I can't see there is much more but who knows LOL. She also visited our family ref so thats 2 steps nearer today. Homework is to look up some of the health issues we have worries about as next visit on 16th is to talk about contact and what we could and couldn't d/w so all looking good.    again tonight its been a tough few wks and think I had kinda got wrapped up in my pain etc and forgotten whats round the corner so feel better again tonight if that makes sense 

Hope everyone is ok xx


----------



## GERTIE179

Evening All,

Aww panoram - very excited for you hun 

Hope everyone is well (sorry its hard keeping up with all the personals chatty ladies hehe)

AFM - Im very excited - i called SW today as hadn't heard back and the report has now been done (from Prep)  and they agree we should start home study - its been a wait but i'm  very relieved.  Been on cloud 9 all afternoon!!  I know we still have a  long way to go but this hurdle has now been crossed yeah!!  Stepping stones to the future :-D

Luv Gertie  x


----------



## ❣Audrey

Sweets - massive congrats on approval!

Panorama - yay!!!! xxx

AAA- nearly there chick  can't wait for you to be a Mummy xxx

Hope everyone else is well.  As you know I haven't been around for quite some time.  After my individual visit I had a lot to take in as I had to come to terms with the fact that although I knew that I didn't have the best of childhoods, my social workers first words were that I would never come across a child now who had been through what myself and my brother had.  It was a shock but I dealt with it.  We then went on holiday and were surrounded by people our age with young families and my sister gave birth to her second child and it brought a lot of feelings back again.  I started the grieving questionnaire and it all came tumbling out - that I still wanted mini versions of hubby, but I also wanted to adopt because we'd not had any luck and i knew in my heart adoption was right for us, but at the same time I didn't want to resent our adopted children once they arrived if I felt I hadn't fully let go.  Anyway I sent it to our social worker who was amazing.  She said it was very brave of me to be so honest and that a break from the process would be a good thing.  They also organised counselling for me to talk about these feelings.  That was in November.  It felt strange to be taking a break but I knew it was the right thing to do.  Anyway we decided to not actively try, but just not prevent for a while whilst I figured out how I felt - at least that way we'd know once and for all that it truly wasn't going to work and we could progress.  But it would seem that for now ( I say for now because I can still see us adopting in the future) our adoption journey is truly on hold as you can see from my ticker.  I just wanted to say what an honour it has been to be supported by you wonderful ladies as we started our adoption journeys. I still read up on the thread and think of you all xxx


----------



## Boggy

Oh WOW, congrats Bee Bee.  

Bx


----------



## panorama

Hi Bee - wow congrats hun!! Totally understand about you needing a break, was wondering where you were!    I guess some things are meant to be...    Really hope everything goes well for you!!     xx


----------



## panorama

Oh forgot to say:

Gertie - great news!! Once you start hs it really flies!!


----------



## watakerfuffle

Lots going on for you all, all very exciting. I imagine the waiting side of things must be very hard, I am so impatient anyway!!

Has anyone on here any experience of Devon/Somerset/Dorset LA's?? I seem to fall within catchment area for all 3 and moving forward with one is proving tricky as I don't know how I should decide! 

Thanks for all my welcomes


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi all,

Although I'm not here much any more, I still pop in from time to time to see how everyone is 

I just wanted to let you know our good news,

Our court hearing went without hitch and we are now officially Nemo's Mummy & Daddy!  
It always gave me hope during our assessment to read of others at the other end of their journey, so I hope my post does that a little bit for others.
Yep, it is a long road, but it truly is a distant memory and so very worth it when you eventually become a Forever Mummy & Daddy!  
Our little man is the light of our life, we couldn't imagine loving him more than we do and we feel so very blessed.

I also want to say......

Bee......... HUGE CONGRATULATIONS hun!!!!!!   
What wonderful news!
Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy, and lots of love to you and Mr.Bee x

Hope everyone's well,

Love Anj x


----------



## Cars

Anjelissa- Congrats    So delighted for you and your family.

Bee- OMG, I wondered where you were! Congratulations, thrilled for you.

Love to everyone at whatever stage of their journey they are at.

Cars x


----------



## Anjelissa

Thanks Cars   

I've just noticed you had a bfp too!!!!  
I'm having a mental moment as I can't remember if I already knew that or not   
Just in case I didn't......

HUGE CONGRATULATIONS!!! to you too hun   


Love Anj x


----------



## annastacia

so so wonderful to be hearing everyone's positive news, wherever you are in the process (and a big congrats to the ladies expecting bc's too)   Congrats Anjelissa....it definately helps to read updates like yours 
We are getting our draft papers tonight, that will be sent to mp, so a glass of wine and a long read is in order!! All on track for mp 28th.....feels really really real  !!!!!! 3 weeks til we meet our little man all being well.


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Wow what a week of fantastic news

Bee and Jake congratulations hun you know how happy I am for you both and hubby was well chuffed for you as well, take care and we must sort out meeting up soon. Guess you won't be in a hurry for your books back now mind LOL x

Anj and Mr Anj and Nemo yeah so happy for you must be a great feeling xx

Hope everyone is ok xx


----------



## galaxy girl

Bee congrats!! I also had been wondering where you were and hoped you were all right. And It's obvious you are!

Well we are now approved Foster carers....Whoo hoo! Adoption panel tomorrow.....


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Wow GG a wk of good news continues and I am sure tomorrow will be more fab news Good Luck xx


----------



## ❣Audrey

AAA - I have more for you too chick!!!  We must must must meet up again!  It's been too long!  I hope you're feeling better today chick.  Text me when you're about and we'll have a cuppa and a catch up xxx


----------



## popsi

just wanted to call in and say huge congratulations to every single one of you with good news, be it panel, courts, or BFP ! what a fab run of luck on this thread at moment 

I do read every day but finding time to post with a 2 year old going on teenager !! is not happening lol and back in work now too so manic

been a year since we brought our princess home and each day it just gets better and better, remember keep the whole picture in your hearts when things are tough as it worth all the delays etc when your forever family come home 

we are starting to think about when to make the call to extend our family now ... so watch this space


----------



## skyblu

Panorama
A huge   to you ladies with BFP
Sweets - how are you hun, has it sunk in yet lol
Poochie - were are you from,it sounds like you are having the same probs as me

Hi to all you ladies hope you are all well, cant remember you all and what stages you are at. Will try to do better next time.

AFM - we had good news yesterday, we have been approved to carry on with our adoption journey and we don't need to wait 6 months, thank god.
We will be invited to a information evening in March and hopfully start the prep courses in May, I just hope time goes by quickly, I am so impatient lol.

Thank you ladies for your support
Skyblu.xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Skyblu yeah great news roll on May 

Bee thanks hun I have a fair few books now LOL I have just reserved 2 at the library just hoping they arrive quickly as sw is going to discuss medical issues with us on Wed and its the drug/alchol effects I wanted to know more about so need the books quick sharp LOL. Meeting up sounds good we haven't been into town since Nov but when I am more mobile will defo let you know. You take care x

Popsi aw lovely news it was you that gave me hope when I joined FF regarding adoption I loved reading your stories and its so nice to hear you so happy look forward to hearing about arrival no 2   

GG hope it has all gone well today x

Its really lovely coming on here at the moment its such a positive thread really and its great x


----------



## libby29

What fab news everyone has, how exciting! 

Well we just had another hs and now only have 4 more yay!  Time really is beginning to fly now and we are just so chuffed. Been given our date for panel today so really feel like theres a date to aim for now and its not so far away (1st week in may). Just a really good day today and just wanted share and wish everyone else goodluck. xxx


----------



## galaxy girl

We are approved!!!!!  .

It was very quick thank goodnesss -I was a bag of nerves. Only question was how we found the process.

Have had a lovely day and our nephews and nieces are over the moon about a potential new addition to the family.

Thanks for all the support this far ladies!


----------



## liveinhope

Great news Galaxy - well done!

Pleased to hear your news too Libby!

We start our prep course in less than a week - cant believe we are finally on a road that will lead to us being parents


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

This thread is so positive at the moment and its wonderful   

Skyblu - I am pleased that you have been allowed to proceed. Good luck.

GG -  on being approved, I hope you guys get a match really soon.  

Libby - Great news for you too.

Popsi - Thanks for coming back and paying us a visit.

Bee_bee -  on your natural BFP.   Wishing you a very healthy pregnancy.

Hi to everyone else, keep the faith it seems to be paying off.  

Cindy.x


----------



## panorama

Just a quickie:

GG - congrats!!!      Hope you have been celebrating tonight! Didn't realise you were also being approved as a foster carer! Wonderful news! xx


----------



## Belliboo

Bee-bee wow congratulations on your natural bfp fab news

Popsi I loved reading your diary can't believe a year has gone by already 

Galaxy girl congrats on becoming foster carers good luck for adoption panel again

Anjelissa congratulations on officially being nemos parents must have been. Great day for you

Hope everyone home study's  are going ok we've just finished our just waiting to read our draft report & possibly for panel end of march fingers crossed

Hi to everyone else hope your all ok xxx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

GG Yeah Congratulations so pleased for you xx


----------



## watakerfuffle

Congrats to all those with such good news  

We have completed step one, receiving info pack and reading through it all. Now onto step 2, we are booked onto an information evening which is in about a months time. Exciting times ahead as well as full of worry we won't be taken on.


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Wow so much good news going on. Nothing to report here but I am genuinely delighted to hear everyones exciting news, BFP's and approvals. What a happy place to be at the moment!!!    Well done all xx


----------



## Poochie1111

Wow, I've been away from the thread for a fews days and come back to so much good news!!!

Bee and Cars - congrats on your BFPs. 

Anjelissa - congrats on becoming an official mummy - lovely news!

GG - congrats to you as well on both your approvals - what a week!

Skyblu - I'm yorkshire based. Great you've been told that you don't have to wait 6 months.

Hope you all have lovely weekends.

x


----------



## libby29

Well ladies i'm sticking with you!  After a couple of days surfing the adoption uk message boards i've decided they are way to negative and full of people judging others when replying to their posts (not helpful). Right that said i am glad to say this site is way better and everyone supports rather than judges so lets carry on our good work ladies.  Here's to ff........hip hip hoorray!  lol


----------



## Boggy

libby29 said:


> Well ladies i'm sticking with you! After a couple of days surfing the adoption uk message boards i've decided they are way to negative and full of people judging others when replying to their posts (not helpful). Right that said i am glad to say this site is way better and everyone supports rather than judges so lets carry on our good work ladies. Here's to ff........hip hip hoorray! lol


----------



## charlie_44

Just wanted to say a quick hi to everyone   this thread is fast moving and I agree so supportive   

All the happy news is fab   

We've just done our last prep course so are on a high    can't wait for HS.  

Sorry no personals but my head is   today so will have a good read and catch up soon.

xx


----------



## Tarango

Libby29 - I agree with you!    to this board!


Hello everyone else   


love
T
xx


----------



## wynnster

Yay - FF is FAR better       Stick with us


----------



## annastacia

Not got much time but wanted to say a big congrats   to GG!!! Great news, well done. Totally agree about AUK, it can make for scary reading at times....  , am liking it here much better


----------



## Duckling

*Congratulations Galaxy Girl!! *  
Fantastic news Bee - congratulations! I too used to read your posts while I was a 'lurker' and wondered how you were.
Skyblu I'm so pleased things are moving again x
Popsi lovely to see your post and your news - you know your diary made a big impression on me!x
Hi everyone else, sorry not individual messages for everyone. Love from Duckling xx


----------



## mum-in-waiting

Hi

We have finally had the call from Social services for the inital chat, we have been to a pre meeting and I have bought a couple of books but has any one got any help how we can prepare etc as we have a few things against us but this really is my only way to have a family?

Thanks


----------



## liveinhope

1st day of course went well - have to have meeting with SW's to see if we progress to next 4 sessions! Fingers crossed
xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

LIH Good Luck x

MIW we well i should just say I did a lot of reading and tallking to people on here, just relax and be honest x

Well girls we have a date for approval panel 27 APRIL we are both so excited LOL last week she was all for May/June then she comes and tells us that today I really don't know how we managed to sit on the sofa and stay calm as soon as she'd gone we were laughing and joking both of us on the phone just feels fab


----------



## skyblu

Congrats Always an auntie, hopefully time will fly by and you will be at the panel with a great YES.
Good luck
Skyblu.xx


----------



## liveinhope

Great news Always an Aunty - wont be long now!


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi all,

I still pop in from time to time to see how everyone is  
So many new names now! It's hard to keep up!  
Thank you for your congratulations re/Nemo being officially ours  You are all lovely 

I just wanted to say,

AAA.....Congratulations on getting a panel date! That's wonderful news!   
Not long now and it will all be done and dusted!! 

Good luck to all of you.

Luv Anj x


----------



## charlie_44

M-I-L - welcome   I have sent you a PM.

liveinhope - hope the meeting with the SW goes well   

AAA - congrats - I bet you're both so excited   

Anjelissa - congrats on Nemo being offically yours   


Hi to everyone else - hope you're doing okay


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Just done a massive post and laptop lost it    

So will now say, conmgrats to all good knews     

M-I-W- welcome. 

Always- woo hoo, panel date is fab

Bee- congratulations

GG- congratulations

Anj- glad all is well with nemo

Liveinhope- glad 1st course went well, sure you'll be on the next ones x

Hi to everyone else, making it short incase laptop miss-behaves again.

We have had our details passed onto the consortium today now so got fingers and toes crossed we'll hear something soon. 

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks everyone

Anj thanks i can't believe it all really it has all happened so quickly really, this time last yr I was sniffing and feeling all gloom and doom and now I am gonna be a mummy and even better than that the man I love so much will be a daddy    Hope Nemo is keeping you busy and you managed to get dried out at home x

Sweets hope you hear some good news real soon x


----------



## Anjelissa

Evening again all,

Sweets, GG & Panorama....Congrats to you all on your approvals  Hope you don't have to wait long for a match  (I can't remember if I've congratulated any of you yet, so just in case I'm doing it again  )

AAA.... Before you know it you will be tucking your little one up in bed (as we've just done,..... that is after a bit of a tizzy fit as it's hair wash night, he soooooo hates that, bless him) and then you'll be 6 months down the line and feeling like you can't remember life before them!  Time really does fly doesn't it! 
You'll breeze through panel no probs! I'll be thinking of you  
We're almost dried out, we have industrial humidifiers in our garage for about 2 weeks, and they have now agreed to a new drive way, so although it was a pain in the butt, it's all worked out ok. We just have a lot of junk everywhere atm that we had to salvage from the garage whilst it's being dried out, but hopefully we'll be back to normal soon. Thanks for asking 

Hope you're all having a good evening,

Luv Anj x x


----------



## sweets x

Anj- have you had a leak hun??
Its terrible isn't it, we had a burst pipe in the loft and the mess in the house is unbelievable. On a plus side though, once everything gets done it'll be nice and new  x x

Always- thankyou x


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi Sweets, 
Long-story-as-short-as-possible  .......
We has a burst water mains leak outside our house on Boxing day which flooded our garage badly (only centimeters from entering the main house). Our garage has been converted into an internal room, so it was slightly worse than had it been just a normal garage.
It also destroyed our driveway as the water was quite deep and went under the drive.
It could have been a lot worse though, and luckily it's nearly all sorted.
We have to wait for dryer weather until they lay our new drive, but it will be lovely when that's done as the original one was quite old anyway. That's a positive that came out from it all.
I was just glad DH & Nemo were ok as DH stepped down into the garage up to his ankles in water on Boxing Day morning (and there are electrics out there  ).

I hope you're all sorted from the burst pipe in your loft if that was recently   

Luv Anj x


----------



## sweets x

Anj- Your dh was lucky then thankfully.
We have builders coming on monday to give estimates, we need the whole house re-decorating, apart from kitchen and bathroom. New floorboards and the hallway and landing, stairs needs stripping as its artex and has blistered so risk of aspestoss  (sp) lol.
On a plus side though i hated that artex. Also, getting rid of the main carpet. We only had it laid a few months ago and i hate it, dh said we can't afford a new one but now its water damaged so getting one.


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Every cloud ha. My poor mum and dad are having the same problems at the moment the whole down stairs of their home has been effected its a complete mess Dad is looking on the positive its gonna be a job he doesn't have to do but my poor mum is tearing her hair out bless her. May it all soon be sorted and everyone living in a wet mess soon all be sorted x

Anj I love hearing your little comments about Nemo it has helped me so much realise that this can and will happen thanks hun x


----------



## Poochie1111

Morning all

AAA- congrats on your panel date. Another step closer! Hope the next few months fly by.

MIL - welcome aboard!

Short update from me.  We were waiting to hear back from SS to see if we have to wait until May before we can start the home visit process which would be 12 months after my M/C.  Well, they confirmed that we do which is a bit frustrating so I'm hoping the next few months go as quickly as possible.  At least it gives us time to focus on finishing decorating the house and getting new carpets laid which we desperately need.

Hope you all have good weekends. It's predicting snow in Yorkshire tonight believe it or not!

x


----------



## Anjelissa

Sweets....I hope all the restoration work isn't too much of an upheaval for you. Wont your insurance company pay for a new carpet if it's damaged? I really feel for you as our flood was just confined to one room and a destroyed driveway, but I can imagine how much more upsetting it would be if it involved a larger area  I hope it all gets sorted for you soon.
We had the contractors in again this morning and we need to have the humidifier machine for another week as apparently it's still all really damp  .
Thankfully our insurance also covers the cost of the electric for it as its a huge machine x

AAA.... It will happen to you before you know it   .
The time from matching to where we are now (almost 6 months after placement) goes sooooo quickly! I know everyone always says that children grow up so fast, but he has gone from a baby to a little boy before our eyes in just 6 months!!!  
DH was having a conversation with one of his work colleagues yesterday (who has also had a few unsuccessful attempts at IVF), he was trying to explain how much we love Nemo and couldn't possibly imagine loving a birth child any more than we love him. If we knew back when we had our IVF what we know now, we would have gone straight to adoption. I think they are just beginning to consider adoption and DH was trying to explain that for us it wasn't 'plan B', but the plan that we should have gone with straight away as plan 'A'!
We feel so blessed to have our beautiful, funny, adorable, perfect little boy and if I could go back, wave a wand and make us able to have our own birth child I wouldn't change a thing!
As I have said before, there is a lot to be said for destiny and I believe there is already a little one out there for you who is meant to be with you. 
They are now nearly at the end of their journey to you, just as you are almost at yours towards them  
Just to emphasise that point, we have friends from our prep course who have had a really rough ride through their assessment, amongst many other things, they have had their panel cancelled 5 times through no fault of their own!  They are such a lovely couple and will be such wonderful parents that it's just ludicrous that they have had such a hard time! 
I have tried to reassure her on the occasions where she has been quite down that when they eventually get placed with their little one/s they will look back and be glad for the delay as had it all gone like clockwork they would never have even met those particular little children.
They have now just been linked with 2 adorable little boys aged 2 & a half, and 3 months. When she saw their picture for the first time she said they both felt as if they were always meant to be their Mummy & Daddy and love them already, they are on cloud 9.  
She now understands what I was trying to say.
You will be where they are really soon too 

Yikes..... I have heaps to do whilst little man is on nap, and once again I have got sucked in to FF world!!  

Catch you all soon,

Luv Anj x


----------



## panorama

Hello everyone

Anj - thanks  Nemo seems just perfect for you, your words are lovely, can't wait to be where you are now, hopefully not too long!  Sorry to hear about the flooding hope it gets sorted soon!

Sweets - hope yours gets sorted soon too, how annoying, but it will all look great when its done (I hate artex too!! )

AAA - great news, the countdown begins now! 

M-I-W - welcome! Reading books is good plus any volunteer work with children also a plus!

L-I-H - sure you will get snapped up to the next stage! 

Hello everyone else! We are meeting our SW on monday to discuss a plan going forward and hopefully to get some more info on 3 littlies coming up! Hope the wait is not going to be long for all of us!   

Have a nice weekend all!

p xx


----------



## galaxy girl

Hi all - thanks for the congratulations !! we are still over the moon.

AAA whoo hoo on panel date.

Panorama - EXCITING!!

anj -love to hear about Nemo. that is lovely  - to think the child who is meant for us is on its/their way!


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks everyone

Anj you have just brought tears to my eyes how amazing for your friends its lovely to hear it has all come right. I still have my doubts that Bubba will be with us this yr as I am sure the hospital won't hold off with my hysterectomy unless he has come up with a miracle drug which will solve the problems LOL but I do just feel this is all so right and when it happens it will happen at the right time, its just such a big thing for me to be approved so fingers crossed for that at the mo. I hope your hubbies work colleague comes to a decision soon I remember the day last yr when we finally knew what was right and I will never forget the relief and excitement I felt!

Take care everyone and have lovely weekends xx


----------



## siheilwli

Can I quickly make my first post here to say hello! 

It's been a bit of a long road for us to find a LA / London borough that would take us on (we were either too far, too white, too close....) but now that we have, I feel I can join you lovely people here. 

We're having our first home visit in a couple of weeks, and are going on courses mid March. I think we may be being sort of fast tracked because we're willing to take siblings. 

What should I expect for the home visit? I've started spring cleaning like a mad woman, but unsure what to expect.

thanks
Cat


----------



## charlie_44

Hi and welcome siheilwli   

Try not to worry to much about your first visit - it's not half as scary as you imagine, infact it's not scary at all    I also cleaned like a mad woman (most do!) but it wouldn't have mattered if I hadn't.  She did have a quick 'head around the door look' around the house but sometimes this doesn't happen on a first visit.  The visit lasted about and hour and a half and we just talked abit about why we wanted to adopt, infertility (though just touched on this), family, our interests and hobbies, how many children we wanted and age group.  There were no trick questions.  I was so nervous but once she was here it was fine and went well.  Lots of luck, let us know how you get on.

Hi to everyone else


----------



## racheypache13

Hi all,
My husband and I went to an info meeting on 8th Dec and got a letter in Jan saying they would be in touch within 6-8 weeks to arrange a home visit to discuss whether they would take us on. It is 6 weeks today so starting to get very excited now! I am also so scared they are going to tell us that we are not their priority at the moment (we would like 0-2, and only one child). I would feel like I had wasted 3 months if they do. We told them this at the info meeting though so would they have said a no then? It's all getting so real and exciting but scary too!
Rache


----------



## Faithope

May I join in??

I'm not adopting-my DH is adopting our son (DS was concieved in a previous r/ship but DH has bought DS up since he was 4yrs old) so we are going through the adoption process at the moment-we have filled in the huge amount of forms, after going to the Step-parent adoption meeting. We are now doing a 3 month wait ready to be assigned a SW. 

If you feel its not appropriate me posting here then don't be afraid to tell me to hop it


----------



## Boggy

Hello Faithope

You are very welcome to post here - whatever form adoption takes there are always similarities (like the eternal waiting for things to happen!) so feel free to share your experiences here  

Bx


----------



## panorama

Morning   

Faithhope - that is realy lovely, hope it goes smoothly for you!

Welcome to racheypache13 & siheilwli - good luck!

AAA - fingers crossed for this year & a miracle drug!   

GG - what's the next step for you?    Glad you are still on   

Saw our sw on monday and there are two prospective girlies coming up, but their court cases not being settled till next month so we have to wait a bit longer to get their profiles. But one of them sounds very exciting    and strangely enough we know her foster carers as they were on our prep course as they are now looking to adopt! But they have to go out of area so can't adopt litttle girl. So a bit exciting, but need to keep grounded for now and wait a bit more! So maybe looking at one last escape abroad next month!    

p xx


----------



## Faithope

*Boggy* Ah thank you-I would love to share my experiance of adoption with you all, I can hopefully help people who may want to go through the same thing and are unsure how it all works.

*panorama* Thank you, I hope so too-DH is so amazing taking on a child thats not biologically his own which has made me realise that if our IVF doesn't work then adoption of a child may be a route that we can take 

Special  to Charlie_44-she has become a good friend to me and suggested I post here, so  to you x

AFM we are waiting for our notification period to be over-we submitted our paperwork to Childrens services on 7th of Feb so only got 2 months left of waiting... 

Hope to do more personals when I get to know you all


----------



## charlie_44

Good afternoon ladies   

rachelpachel - hope all goes well and you hear soon   

Faithope - hi and welcome to the thread hun   

panorama - wow exciting news   bet it's hard to keep grounded!  I hope the next month goes quick for you.

Hi to everyone else   

Afm - we've had our SW visit to discuss how we did on the prep course and talk about what happens next   She left us the homework we'll be doing throughout HS.  I wish I could switch my head off now as i'm going over everything that we said    Looking forward to HS   

xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi everyone i am reading but bit    at the moment and can't remember anything sorry LOL

Panaroma awesome news must be really hard trying to stay grounded lets hope the next few weeks go flying past. 

Faithope welcome hun x

Charlie44 It gets me like that after every single visit normally spend the night on the sofa watching tv and trying to take my mind off it all. I don't know why as its always so positive just makes me think and to be honest I do more then enough of that anyway LOL. Good luck with the homework, have to say didn't find ours that bad but think sw done most of it on visits as we didn't seem to have a lot to do! Well not as much as I thought there would be! There you go classic example of me over thinking! 

AFM last reference done and dusted and sounds like it went well, my manager did his yesterday so they should have got it back today


----------



## annastacia

Bin busy preparing for our (hopefully  ) new addition, so not had time to post, but wanted to say a quick congrats on panel date panorama  , welcome to faithope and siheilwli  , hope everyone's journey's are going well. 
Loving your little stories of Nemo anjel  
Mp on monday....can't quite believe it!


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Annastacia    on Monday, how have you found the getting the house ready and buying stuff? I only ask as when we did our prep course the 2 adoptive parents there said they'd found this time really hard and didn't enjoy buying things etc just wondering how people on here have found it?

Hope everyone has lovely weekends xx


----------



## waywardstork

Hello everyone.
Been awol a over the last few weeks.  Didn't realise how long last I posted.  Oops!  
Congrats to those who have been aproved, got a recent BFP or have a match in the wings.  Hoop all goes well for all of you.

AFM ... Got two weeks before prep group starts .... lots of finger twiddling going on. Lol.  Can't wait to get moving.  Patience is a virtue, virtue is a grace, Grace is a little girl who hasn't washed her face. Lol  Been thinking of all the things I could be doing now already .... making lists of things I will need to buy later on ... things I need to do in the house ....  
Killing time, basically.

Hope everyone has a great weekend. 

xxx
Waywardstork


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

waywardstork. t will be here before you know it enjoy the prep course.  LOL I am always writing lists and making plans, we sat here the other night talking of changing the door in Bubba's room to give it a bit more space. i have a list of things we could buy now and then a list of stuff to buy when we know what Bubba is gonna be and what age and it goes on LOL. I smiled at your little rhyme as well about a yr ago I brought our nephew a baby doll in a basket called Grace (he wanted one and his mum wouldn't let him) Well he found Grace the other day and took her out with them shopping LOL I didn't laugh too much he is now 5! Think these things are gonna come bite me on the bum soon hee hee.

Hope everyone has lovely weekends


----------



## charlie_44

Hiya   

AAA - I'm def an over thinker, I drive my DH potty    The homework we have is on everything that will be discussed during HS.  We have to write the statements and answer many many questions, which the SW will then chat to us about.  My sister is a SW in a fostering team and says she does the majority of it with her FC's but looks like we are doing it mostly so the LA's must do it different.  My DH announced that he used to do his homework on the bus on his way to school so I've a feeling I'll be kicking him up the   a few times   

annastacia -   

waywardstork - prep course will be here before you know it.  It's heavy and tiring but enjoyable to.  I think all parents to be should have to attend these!   

Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Charlie LOL sounds just like us. We have been really lucky then, it appears every SW does it differently speaking to other couples on our prep course some of them had been given it all to do like you and others were similiar to us. To be honest think this is the best way for us, she has probably got more out of hubby as like yours he said he used to do it sitting in registration as he lived so close to school he didn't have a bus journey! Bless them 

Annastacia really looking forward to hearing some more lovely news tomorrow bet you are really excited. Good Luck xxx


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Poochie- hope the wait till home visit goes quickly for you.

Anj- your posts are lovely, bring tears to my eyes when i read them.  Hope your all well. Hows the work going?

Panaroma- hope your doing ok and links going great.

Annastacia- best of luck for tomorrow. 

Siheilwli- welcome to the thread, hope your visit goes well. Just try and be yourself. I cleaned like a mad woman when we had our first visit too, skirting boards and everything    

Rache- Welcome. Hope you heard back about being took on.

Faithope- welcome   

Charlie 44- hope you enjoy home study. 

Always- glad things are going ok x x

Waywardstork- Liked your rhyme   Hope you enjoy prep group.

Galaxygirl, boggy, and anyone i have missed- hope your ok 

We have had an exciting week. We have s/w coming out on the 3rd to discuss a link. Trying to not get too excited as there are some issues that we need to go through. Haven't been able to think about anything else since though    

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## Poochie1111

Sweets - that great news.  I imagine it's impossible not to get excited.  Fingers crossed!!

Panaroma - your news sounds exciting too.  Hope you get some good news soon!

Waywardstork - hope the next two weeks fly by for you.

Annastacia - all the best for tomorrow   

Welcome Siheilwli, Faithope and Rache   

x


----------



## Faithope

*sweets and poochie* thanks for the warm welcome xx will be posting more when my adoption journey starts moving  but will read your journeys and hopefully join in the posts


----------



## panorama

Morning all!

Sweets - that's great news!  Fingers crossed!    

Annastacia - hope it goes well today! How exciting!!   

Hope you are all doing well, I just want March to fly by now as we won't be getting the profiles till then, fingers crossed! Saw my 2 year old niece last friday and couldn't help scrutinising all she does and wondering if she'll be getting a cousin soon to play with!    But trying not to get overexcited just yet just in case! Hard though!!

But we have today started redecorating one of the bedrooms as we are moving stuff around so at least we are doing something!


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone, this is a busy thread! I love reading all your news and I'm sorry I've been rubbish keeping up with the posting. 
Panorama - it sounds so exciting, I can't wait until we're approved. I have been planning and list making and going through the Mothercare catalogue (I feel really naughty doing it though!  )
Faithhope, Siheilwli - welcome - this thread has helped me so much.
Sweets - Wow! Keep us informed, it sounds like things are really moving now.
AAA & Charlie - I agree completely - I get really upset if things aren't perfect. Filling in a form about how prep course went and am analysing and agonising over every word, driving dh nuts!
AAA - a panel date!! Fantastic!
Annastacia - really hope things went well. x
I know I have forgotten so many more, so hi everyone and I hope you're all ok.
Our prep courses have finished and I don't think we'll hear about home study until after Easter from what they said. Feeling really positive and more confident after the course. Know we can do this. So lovely to meet others in the same position and I really hope we keep in touch. It was really hard work going to the course after work all those weeks, but I'm thrilled we did it, have learnt so much and can't wait for home study. Trying to fill in the wait by seeing how we can cut back on spending and a little sneaky planning. Want to do a first aid course for children but a bit put off by the thought might be full of pregnant ladies (should I be over this by now?)
Anyway, have a good week everyone,
love from Duckling x


----------



## annastacia

head's in a total spin.........got a wonderful, amazing, unanimous YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!      
Still in shock and giddy with excitement. We meet our beautiful boy next week, so just enough time to make sure all those last little bits are done!! AAA....I held off on the shopping until after we had met the fc, and our sw was pretty confident we'd get a yes. It was lovely to shop although I was also practical and kept receipts (just in case). We had got the room half ready before (painted white and put chest of drawers in there) and now we've added curtains, pics and a cot (eeeek!!!  )
Thanks for everyone's good luck messages......I do remember feeling that everything was moving so slowly but now I'm here it feels like 2mins ago that we had approval (it was actually 8mths ago!) so don't lose hope guys, it really will happen  
crossing my fingers for you sweets  
Panorama....keeping busy is good and you'll be thankful you made a start when everything starts to happen at once  
Waywardstork..... we really enjoyed prep, hope you meet some good friends cos it's lovely to help each other through
Duckling.....hs will be here before you know it.....if you thought prep was hard work wait til you have to talk about yourself for hours on end, it truly is like therapy  
Hi to everyone else.....look forward to updating you when we start intros


----------



## Faithope

*annastacia* thats fab news!! xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Annastacia YEAH Congratulations hun I am so pleased for you


----------



## sweets x

Annastacia- woo hoo.....roll on next week     

Duckling- When i did my first aid course it was full of people wanting to be child minders...no pregnat women at all.
Really enjoyed it so hope you have the courage to go on and do it, totally understand your fears hun.   

Panarama- is so hard to staty grounded isn't it x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Sweets fingers crossed hun roll on the end of the week xx


----------



## Poochie1111

Congratulations Annastacia - fab news!!! How exciting.


----------



## liveinhope

Great news Annastascia

xx


----------



## Duckling

*Congratulations Annastacia!!!*

Thanks Sweets 

Duckling x


----------



## *daisy-may*

Hello. Please can I join you.

We had our initial home visit last week, not as scary as I thought. We are now waiting for the report from our visit and hopefully can attend prep course in May


----------



## LELS

Hi I'm new!
I have been reading for ages though, we have been through 3 ICSIs and now are starting the process of adoption which I'm really excited about, although I am feeling mighty impatient!

Daisy-May it looks like we are at exactly the same stage really. I too had my last ISCI in Aug last year and now I am waiting for my prep course in May. We haven't been given dates yet but have been told we're definitely on it.


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Welcome to the thread girls.

DM really pleased you have come to join us    and really pleased the first visit went well xx

AFM Last home study tomorrow yeah; mind you is gonna be strange not having those visits


----------



## *daisy-may*

AAA- I thought it was about time I joined. I have been reading for ages but wanted to get going first.

LELS Hello. Great to finally get going. I am not that great at waiting- something I think I will have to get used to.

I am now trying to sort out child experience hoping to go to the local primary school and beavers.


----------



## charlie_44

Wow this has moved fast since I last looked   

Sweets - good luck   I'm not surprised you can't think of anything else!

panorama - hope March flys by for you   

Duckling - glad you're feeling positive after prep course, it's very exciting isn' it   

annastacia -   great news!

daisy may and LELS - Welcome to the thread   

AAA - hope your last HS went well   

Hi to Faithope, Poochie, liveinhope and everyone else


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

DM Good Luck sorting out child experience we were lucky and didn't have to do it, but people on our prep course have got loads from doing it.

Well last visit done and dusted was the hardest one yet we spent a lot of time talking about issues/abuse/health problems etc but we survived. The only thing that is going to hold us back now is my health issues have scan on 12 march to see what is going on inside and the doc has then got to write a letter to confirm I am fit enough to look after a child. I am feeling really sad tonight as just when we thought the end was in sight the brick wall is being built again, I know if it is delayed its cause our little one isn't ready for us yet but just a bit


----------



## charlie_44

AAA -     Hang on in there    I   all will be well for you sooner rather than later.


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks hun x


----------



## *daisy-may*

AAA-


----------



## Anjelissa

Evening all,
Welcome to all the newcomers 

AAA.......  You know my view point on it, but I also know how hard it is to try to be positive and to think of destiny and fate etc when there just seems to be barrier after barrier in the way. 
You WILL get there and I so hope things aren't delayed for you, but delayed or not, you WILL get there 

sweets......How exciting!!!  I remember that moment as if it were yesterday and it will always be such a special memory. Lots of luck for tomorrow 

Have a good evening all,

Love Anj x x


----------



## Arrows

hugs to AAA

sorry I've not been on in ages.
I'm very tired and off work with a bad back this week but otherwise fine. We've received a good report from our prep course and now really need to get our formal application form done and handed in the the social workers but after being burgled a month ago and now feeling totally out of control with everything and falling a little behind on my course I'm struggling. 
It doesn't help that daytime tv is naff and i end up watching the birth stories - i still cry when i watch them.
My best friend is expecting her 3rd and my cousin who has 4 kids and got sterilised, is now with a new partner and in the middle of IVF to try for  a 5th! I don't begrudge her the desire -her circumstances are different now and much more stable but still a bit of a kick when she suffered PND with at least 2 of them. Only 2yrs ago she offered to give me her eggs/ be a surrogate and now she's egg sharing with a stranger cause it means she gets free treatment.
Here's hoping life starts to pick up again soon -winter always makes me miserable!


----------



## waywardstork

Hello everyone!
Welcome to all the newbies on our thread!
Just a quick post tonight to say congrats to Annastacia!  Hope the next few steps go well.  Can't wait to hear a little more about your little man. xxx


----------



## galaxy girl

AAA - sorry your feeling so down. Fingers crossed scan goes well and you can proceed.....

Arrows-   think these things will always be hard. Avoid birth stories at all costs!! 

Hi to everyone else!


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks everyone, feeling bit more rational today LOL. 

Anj I know and I have the same feelings but it was just pants to hear, when she left hubby was as high as a kite and I was a wreck bless him. I am really tired at the moment and have a stinking headache most days so was just struggling while she was here as well. I know in my heart I need this op doing before Bubba comes home but just wish I didn't if that makes sense. Hope Nemo is ok give him a hug from me hun x

Arrows hope things level out soon hun, spring will soon be here yeah can't wait seriously craving some sunshine and warmth now. Take care xx

Sweets hope today is the start of a fantastic journey x

Hi to everyone else hope you are all ok xxx


----------



## racheypache13

Hi all, lots of love to you all at your many stages.
It will be 8 weeks on Tuesday since I received a letter saying 'we will contact you in 6-8 weeks'. I am desperate to ring but don't want to start off as a nagger!
I'm going to have to learn some patience but.........  why do they have to wait 'til the last minute?
xxx


----------



## panorama

Morning everyone   

racheypache13 - I would just give them a ring or send an email, they do tend to leave things till last minute but they don't normally mind you ringing!

AAA - great you have finished hs, I really hope you can get your medical stuff sorted soon   

GG - hope you are good    Will you be fostering first or going straight for adoption?

Arrows - big    Sounds like you've had a lot on your plate, agree with GG, avoid all birth story stuff!!!!! Hard to deal with people close to you trying etc, but hopefully once you are on your way with hs you will start to feel a lot better, I know I did.

Sweets - so excited for you!!!    Hope it is the one!   

Annastacia - big congrats!!!!! 

*daisy-may* - welcome & good luck!

Love to everyone else. Nothing much to report here but we have booked a last minute holiday to Thailand leaving on the 19th, hopefully our last adult holiday abroad!! Quite excited about it and hoping it will make this month go very quickly!    SW thinks its a great idea   

panorama xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Panaroma sounds lovely and lets hope there is a match for you as soon as you return home how lovely would that be xx

Rach I would ring as well, there is always the other side of a nagger and that is someone that is keen and wanting to get a move on x

AFM feeling better about things tonight, I took the bull by the horns and rang the hospital they had brought my appointment forward from May to 14 March (got the ltr today LOL) so have scan the appointment straight after so at least we will know what is going to happen and if it is a hysterectomy I will be on the waiting list and should hopefully have some  idea of when it will be before panel on the 27 April Yeah


----------



## liveinhope

Have had appointment with our social worker tonight and it was confirmed that our application to adopt has been accepted and we are full steam ahead with prep course, starting next Friday.

Feel so excited....on our way now!


----------



## galaxy girl

Liveinhope- how exciting!!

AAA - good news!

Panorama - we plan to be respite foster carers while waiting for a match...good to get some experience of the types of difficulties we might expect to be faced with!


----------



## racheypache13

Well thanks for the advice to ring, good job I did! They are only just dealing with enquiries from September and as we were Dec/ Jan could be months......
I decided to ring another authority who said a social worker will ring next week. I felt much better talking to the new lady so maybe they will be better for us.
Thanks again, ladies.
Liveinhope: so excited for you xxx
GG: sounds like a great plan


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Just a quickie tonite as tum playing up big style, must be all the excitement lol
We are getting more details on our little two, very exciting but reserved at same time as certain issues we need to iron out first
totally thrilled at the ame time though, they are adorable

Sorry for no personals, hope everyone is ok x x x


----------



## sweets x

Well wat a difference a day makes. Our link is not right for us. After alot of tears and talking we have messaged s/w saying we don't think we can commit to the terms wanted by birth parents. We are devastated. A very big learning curve for us though, we'll definitely be more cautious next time. Will do personals later when on laptop. Take care.  X


----------



## Boggy

Sorry to hear this sweetsx  

bx


----------



## liveinhope

Sorry to hear that Sweets! Big hugs to you!
xx


----------



## Daizy

Hi everyone,
First post so thought I’d pop in here and say hello. 
My hubby and I are approved to adopt, thus hoping I can glean some good advice and tips from people in the same boat. 
Currently, I’m looking for some tips on how to maintain my sanity whilst I wait for news of a possible link. It’s only been a couple of weeks since approval so goodness knows how I’m to cope if we’re waiting months. Wish I had prepared myself better for the post approval wait (sorry, first post and I’m moaning – I’m not usually a moan, promise!).
x


----------



## Boggy

Hi Daizy, and welcome to FF  

No one quite understands just how hard waiting can be until they reach the approved stage - it's a very difficult time but once it's over it's a whole new beginning  

I for one didn't cope well with the wait, though a lot of that was to do with the job i was doing at the time.    I ended up reducing my hours so i had a bit of time to take care of myself.

Definitely go on a good holiday - i really wish we had even just gone to Italy for a weekend or something and now looking back I regret it.  We didn't think we could afford it at the time - but now we have 2 children we definitely can't afford it!

Go to the cinema too - I miss that!!  

Feel free to moan here anytime  

Bx


----------



## Daizy

Thank you for the welcome and the advice boggy, it’s good to speak to someone who has been there. My friends and family are great and have given us such support, but have never been there so obviously aren’t able to truly empathise.
I doubt I’d be feeling this deflated had our social worker not whispered to us on the way out of approval panel that she “had something in mind” for us - but we haven’t heard a thing from her since, wish she hadn’t said anything! 

We’re having our niece to stay this weekend; we’ll take her out for dinner on Saturday night and a long walk with our doggies on Sunday so the weekend will be fun. 
I think (I hope!) once spring is properly here and we’re out and about more it won’t be so tough. I’ve booked a week’s annual leave for early April, I’ll definitely make plans to be busy that whole week and give me plenty to look forward to!


----------



## Poochie1111

Sweets - sorry to hear your link wasn't right this time.  So hard not to get your hopes up   

Welcome Daizy

x


----------



## Anjelissa

Sweets......I'm so sorry to hear your news, I just wanted to send you lots of  

Love Anj x x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Sweets massive hugs to you both hun I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you take care x

Daizy welcome to the thread, sorry can't help as we are not quite there yet but it is something that is worrying me a bit as we are both so impatient. We have kinda being getting the impression from our 2nd hs that our SW has something in mind. Any good tips you do get or find help hun share with me PLEASE 

Hope everyone has lovely weekends xx


----------



## 02cindy

Hi Girls 

Sorry not posted for ages, you've probably all forgotten me   .

Sweets - Sorry to hear that the match was not quite right for you, I am sure that once the right match is found it will be so worth the wait.x  

Daizy - Hello and welcome, congrats on being approved. I hope you get matched soon   .

liveinhope - congrats on getting through another hurdle, hope you get on the prep course soon.

AAA - Wishing you well with all that is going on for you at the moment.    

Panorama - fab news .

AFM - Social Worker called and said that we can proceed to the next stage which is CRB's and medicals. Our LA says we cant do prep course until CRB's come back    is that what you guys had to do? The one good thing is that the prep course is monthly and she said the CRB's are taking about 3 weeks to come back. So we should not have to wait too long.        Also I wondered about the HS, how many sessions and what is the frequency? I like you others am so impatient. Although I have waited 10 years to have a family, so think I have been quite patient enough   

Have a good weekend ladies, 

Cindy.x


----------



## Daizy

Hi to Poochie, Anjelissa, Always an Auntie (love your user name - I’m an uber auntie too lol) and Cindy. Thank you for the warm welcome (and the good wishes, I send the same to you all).


----------



## libby29

Hi Cindy....We had to have both our crb's done and dusted before prep so thats quite usual i think. We had our medicals done after though which most did on our course. As for hs, us personally are having 10. We are having 1 a week usually, other than a couple. It really depends on a few things really hun, if your social worker works full or part time, what days you can get off work (our sw doesn't work week ends or evenings),and really what you feel comfortable with as you may feel you need more time between. We are loving hs, its hard work with lots of home work but we're enjoying it and i'm sure you will too. Hope you get to do prep course soon as thats so interesting. You say they do one a month, thats really good, ours only did 2 a year so we had to wait 7 mths to get on it as we missed the last one by a few days. Anyway i'm babbling on now lol  Good luck  

Hi to everyone else, hope your all well
xx

We only have 3 more hs left now and panel is booked so fingers crossed march and april fly by with no problems. xxxx


----------



## panorama

Hello 

Libby - not long to go now! 

Cindy - we did the CRBs but didn't have to wait till they came back. We had 8 hs in total but did some on the same day. Yes, patience is a virtue!!

Daizy - we also got approved a few weeks ago but trying to keep busy for now with decorating and going on a final adult holiday, waiting is so hard!! Hope we both get lucky soon 

Sweets - so sorry the match didn't work out     Hope you find the right one soon   

Love to everyone else!

p xx


----------



## charlie_44

Hiya   

sweets - so sorry the match didn't work out   

Daizy - welcome to the thread   

Cindy - we didn't have to wait for our CRB's to come back before we went on prep course, though the LA we went with doesn't run the prep courses as often as yours.  They have told us HS will be about 8-10 sessions.  We were left with our homework after our prep course to start getting on with whilst we are waiting our first HS to start, though all LA's seem to do this differently to.  

Libby - not long now   

Big hello's to everyone else   

Afm - we are just waiting for all our checks to come back - though we've both just received our CRB's in the last few days - and are awaiting for a SW to be allocated to us for HS.  We're starting to plough through our homework - though the family tree and ecomap is taking a bit of doing as we both have huge extended families   

xxx


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

Firstly thanks for all your prompt responses regarding my questions.  Our consent forms and CRB's and medical forms turned up today..jeez there are so many forms   .  I think we will have to a form a night, hopefully.  I skimmed through it and it said 'have you ever been declared bankrupt' and my dh has many years ago, do you think this will affect things?    I am feeling quite nervous now   

Charlie - Hope you get a lovely SW allocated soon, and then the next stage starts..Good luck with your homework     

libby - Thanks for answering all my questions..Good luck with the remaining sesions of your hs and it wont be long before your panel date is here...  

Hi to everyone else, hope you all have a bit of sunshine in your life this  week.

Cindy.x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Cindy thanks hun keep thinking about changing my name as will soon be a Mummy (well hopefully LOL) We had 7 homestudy visits they were all about 3 hrs long the last one was almost 3 and a half hrs but we didn't really get a lot of homework after our 1st visit think she could see she would get more from hubby by talking to him so thats what she did. If you can hun don't hold too much on what other people are doing in the group of 8 couples on our prep course not one is being handled the same way some have had 1 or 2 visits a wk we had visits in blocks so we'd have a visit every wk for 3 wks and then not see her for 2 or 3 wks. Be honest about your hubby I don't know if it will be a problem hun but I would imagine they will ask lots of questions if its worrying you why not give them a ring least that way your mind will be at rest.

Hope everyone is ok xx


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone, sorry if this appears twice, but posted and lost it.
Hope everyone is well.
Sweets   
We've been allocated a Social Worker and she's coming to see us next week! So thrilled, expected to have to wait for ages. Typical me though, have found something to worry about - she's an 'independent social worker'. Does anyone know what this means? She's not on the list of social workers in their booklet or website. Maybe she's new. Hope she's nice...
Have a lovely week everyone. I'd better start cleaning.  
Duckling x
p.s. Starfishtigger, lovely idea!


----------



## liveinhope

An Independent Social worker is one not employed by the agency - they are still SW qualified, often it is because agencies are short staffed so they get some extra workers.  Nothing to worry about honest!


----------



## libby29

O2CINDY........i wouldn't get to worried about the bankruptcy. They will want to know when it was and what caused it, but more importantly how you dealt with it, how things have changes and how you will try and deal with things in the future to prevent it happening again. If you are worried sick about it then get it out of the way asap. There were things that we were completely stressed about and waited till they came up to address them and i think this was wrong as they weren't the problem that we thought they would be and could have saved us a big head ache. Good luck hun xx


----------



## skyblu

Hi ladies 

Sorry been AWOL for a while, long story so I will try and make it short.
I was rushed into hospital last Monday in horrific pain and unable to walk.
After begin there for three days I was finally given a scan to see what is going on.
My endo has got much worse and has spread to my kidneys and that I need a hysterectomy asap.
I was finally sent home on Friday and told to take it easy for a few weeks, ye right.
Any way the hospital I was taken to was my local hospital but I am being treated in Cardiff hospital and the waiting list to see my consultant is 3/4 months, so we have decided to go private for that appointment, when I phoned I was told my consultant is away until the end of this week and phone back on Friday 

I knew I would need a hysterectomy for some time but not this soon especially now we are adopting.
I know nothing is going to happen for a while as our information evening is not until 18th of April and our prep course does not start until 16 th of June, so things are a way off yet.
What I would like to know is, has any one else had an op or a hysterectomy during the adoption process and was it a problem.
Sorry for going on but any info would be great, thanks.

Sweets - sorry your match wasn't for you but hopfully you special one or two wont be far away and you get on being a mummy. 

Best of luck to any one waiting and cograts to anyone that has been approved.
I will read back and try and catch up.

Skyblu.xx


----------



## annastacia

Hi all,
skyblu...  big hugs hun, not nice to have to go thru but for adoption purposes as long as you can show that this is something you were prepared for and have dealt with then I wouldn't think it will be an issue.
Sweets....so sorry to hear that you haven't found your match this time, keep strong  we turned down a littly before finding our little man, it's hard but you have to do what feels right.
Cindy....agree with others....be honest, it's more about how you handle things and if you can show that it's not likely to happen again....we learn by our mistakes etc etc 
welcome Daizy ....hope you don't have to wait too long 
Livininhope...well done getting to the next stage. We really enjoyed prep, hope you do too
Hey to everyone else, sorry if I,ve missed important updates, been a bit busy....MEETING MY SON  !!!!!!! 
He is amazing,adorable,delicious......and did I mention...Amazing??!!!! 
Fc's have been great, we've had 2 visits so far and back tom with our precious bd. Fingers crossed she loves him as much as we do .
Will try and drop in again soon if not too exhausted from all the drivin


----------



## Poochie1111

Skyblu - sorry you've had such a rough time of it.  Sounds like you've had quite an ordeal. I hope you can have your operation sooner rather than later.  I imagine Annastacia is right and it's all about showing how you deal with situations and to remain positive. It's good in a way it's happening now before you adoption process gets going.  Big    to you.

Annastacia- lovely to hear your news. How excited you must be!! Bet you can't stop smiling.  Glad it's going so well.   

x


----------



## Tibevora

Not a regular poster so stuggle to do personals but for the most recent ones.....

Skyblu ((((((SB)))))

Anastacia - wow, must be exhausting and exciting

Duckling - dont wear yourself out cleaning!!! I used to not clean my house deliberatley to show we were normal....normally we are manically tidy!!! 

Cindy - Hope it doesnt affect anything, seems to me as long as you "process" it then everything seems fine and is good evidence. 

I read through our form F tonight, my goodness it was massive. We are off to panel on the 24th March, how real it seems now after a longish journey.

Hope everyone else is well

Tib
xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Tib all the best for panel how exciting let me know how it goes I am really nervous about it LOL I am a born worrier so would be really weird if I wasn't worried.

skyblu have pm'd you hun, take care. 

Annastacia hope your amazing little one continues to be amazing   

Massive hugs to everyone else xx


----------



## charlie_44

Duckling - good luck for you're visit - we were told that an independant SW tends to get the assessments done quicker   

skyblu -   

annastacia - glad everything is going well   

Tibevora - good luck for panel   

Hi to everyone else   

Does everyone still feel a bit   when friends have babies?  I'm totally happy and excited with our decision to adopt and wouldn't change that but it comes back to bite me on the   sometimes


----------



## siheilwli

Hi everyone, bit new here so apologies for lack of personals. 

Been accepted to adopt this week, and starting prep group next week. It's quicker than usual because we want siblings. I'm soo excited. 

Glad to see so much support here. 
Cat


----------



## popsi

just dipping in to say good luck to you all in your journeys, its so worth while xx

cat.. hi honey lovely to see you here i often think of you and DH xx


----------



## siheilwli

Popsi - great to see/speak iykwim.  Your journey is a real inspiration xxx


----------



## popsi

aww thank you .. we will be saying the same to you before you know it x


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone,
Thanks Liveinhope, thought that's maybe what she is, bit concerned about not having one of their own.
Charlie that does make me feel better    ! Wierd that it's when I was resigned to a wait we got the letter, there's a lesson for me...
Do agree with you that it's just when I'm thinking 'yes everything's going to be o.k.' that I hear someone's pregnant and 'OUCH!'
Skyblu   . Know there's never really a good time, but at least it's now. Really hope you get it sorted soon.
Annastacia glad it's going well - very exciting!
Hi Poochie, AAA, Siheilwli & Popsi. Popsi glad you keep popping on to keep us going that it's going to be great. Siheilwli Good Luck with Prep courses.
Tibevora you made me laugh    - we are definitely not tidy!
Have a lovely weekend everyone. 
Duckling x


----------



## waywardstork

Hello to everyone.  Hope you are all relaxing at the end of a long week - putting your feet up and chilling.

Annastacia .... wow wow wow ..... can't wait to feel what you are feeling now.  Knowing your little person is soon going to be your soon.  Good luck with all the 'getting to know', waiting and bonding over the next stage. Hope it wnt well with DD!
Skyblu ... on the positive side, if you have your op now ... you won't have it looming over you and it won't be an issue that sw could frown upon as posibly problematic! Hope the op is soon behind you and you are on your way again. xxx

Tib ... not long now.  We got our first look at a blank From F today at prep 1 .... phew, still so much ahead of us. 

As for me .... well,  had an interesting day today!  It was our first prep course day.  It all went well - nothing unexpected at all.  There was much laughter interspersed with all the serious stuff.  Looking forward to day 2 next week.  Can't believe we are finally REALLY moving forward! Now I just have to motivate hubby to do his homework for next session. Lol!  

Have a great weekend all. xxx


----------



## liveinhope

Had our first prep day today and we really enjoyed it.  The information made us think but further confirmed that we are doing exactly the right thing.  I was in tears on the way home, as when I was watching the videos realisation dawned on me that soon we will be parents! I think it is the first time in my life that I actually dared to believe that one day someone will call me mummy!! Makes me well up just thinking about it.

Annastacia - great to hear news of people meeting their lo's, makes our journeys seem real.

Hope you all have a fab weekend
xx


----------



## charlie_44

waywardstork - glad prep course went well.  Your hubby sounds like mine!  Mine told me he did his homework on the school bus on his way to school so needless to say I have to keep promting him now with our homework for HS   

liveinhope - glad you enjoyed your first prep day, it chokes me up when I actually dare believe that I will be a mummy one day   

Hope everyone is enjoying the weekend


----------



## GERTIE179

Hi ladies

Sorry its been a while - had broadband issues for a while then been busy with work so trying to catch up with all the chat for personals :-D

AFM - Initial visit from SW tomorrow - eek!  Is it strange that I am not overly panicked.  I just feel I have been speaking to the SW who is visting since December as we delayed initial visit so we could do the prep course in Dec.  This is the meeting I have been most looking forward to as I am hoping they can tel me how long it will take to get assigned a SW for Home study.

Also looking forward to the Glasgow meet up this week:-D

Love Gertie xox


----------



## hollie2

Hi Gertie

Hope you get on ok with social worker tomorrow - im sure you will, you feeling ok about it.  We have first social worker visit Monday 21st March - this time next week social worker will have been.  feeling exicted but also nervous at the same time.  

Please let me know how you get on

Jen
x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi hollie and welcome back awol Gertie. The initial visit is fine I was a nervous wreck before she came but she hadn't even been here 5 mins when we were both talking freely and its all great feels like you are making the first massive step. Good Luck to you both x

AFM had a hideous morning at the hosptial eventually got to see the consultant who did my op at Christmas even though he wasn't doing clinics today bless him I was a    wreck as the doc we initially saw today was hopeless and couldn't see why there was any urgency and why we couldn't just wait another 3 mths and see what happens    I am now on an 18 wk waitiing list for a hysterectomy I know it is now unlikely that Bubba will be coming home this yr  but at least Mummy will be fit and ready when we are matched!


----------



## racheypache13

Hi everyone,
Lots of love to everyone,
just wondering who has gone with their local authority and who with an agency? What are they advantages/disadvantages to each please?
So exciting to hear about your journeys
Rache


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Rach Hi we went with LA to be honest I saw a poster in the docs waiting room as I was waiting for acupuncture after our last IVF attempt and it was the acu that made everything feel normal again so just felt it was meant to be and didn't look at anything else LOL. Sorry not a lot of help from me but sure there will be others that can help.

Hope everyone else is ok we seem to be a bit quiet on the panel fronts recently guess it all happened at once a few weeks ago.


----------



## Belliboo

Hi everyone 

sorry I've not posted for a while
Bertie good luck with your home visit today
Hope everyone else is doing ok on their adoption journeys.
Liveinhope loved your post it's exciting isn't it thinking we are getting nearer to our dreams
Siheliwill hope your prep groups are going ok
Always an auntie hope your not kept waiting too long for your op 

Hi to everyone else too hope your all ok xx



We've finally completed our home study & have a panel date for 4th April starting to feel bit nervous already


----------



## charlie_44

Gertie - hope your visit went well   

Hollie and Rachel78 - hi   

AAA - hang in there it will happen and at least you will be very prepared   

racheypache - we went with a LA near ish to us though didn't go to our local one.

Hi to everyone else, hope all is well


----------



## sonia7

Hi everyone


Hope you are all well


Sorry I haven't posted for ages but a quick update ...........  still waiting   . We got approved 8 weeks ago, and our social worker is visiting once a month, she took our welcome book to take back to her work to discuss in their team meetings if a possible match comes up. So just waiting and waiting. But we are making positive steps we are getting the house in order and have booked a holiday to Spain. 


Good luck for those who are on their home study and good luck for those who have their panel dates   


Keep positive


Sonia xx


----------



## GERTIE179

Hi everyone

Initial Home visit went very well.  She expects to send her recommendation (to proceed yeah!) to the other LA (we are going through LA and consortium of other LAs).  Once the other LA review the report and agree (she expects them to) and we return the formal application then she has said she will start HS with her so its a yeah on both counts - we quite like this SW and from what you guys have told me this is a big plus.  All in all she would expect us to be no more than 6 months to panel.  So very excited as this means we could be approved before Christmas which is in my book is a very positive Christmas to look forward to. :-D

AAA - hugs   I hope you dont have too long a wait for your Op.

Rachel - good luck on panel   
Sonia - sounds like you are making the wait exciting in the meantime
Charlie/Rachelpache - hi
Hollie - I was actually not that nervous (only the 30mins before she arrived :-D).  Spent ages cleaning the house everywhere and she didn't leave the living room lol but I'm now glad as the house needed a good spring clean.

Love to all
Gertie


----------



## skyblu

AAA , So sorry you had a rubbish time at the hospital.
Some of these Dr's don't have a clue how we feel with the pain we deal with day in day out, especially after you had an op and expected to feel better. 

AT least now you are on the waiting list for your hysterectomy and 18 weeks might seem a long time especially when you are in pain but it will soon fly by.
I have 8/10 months to wait for mine and that is going to be hell, but 18 weeks or 8/10 months I know what you are going through and hope you get your hysterectomy sooner.
Take care hun
Skyblu.xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Skyblu I am sorry you have got to wait so long hun I can't imagine it. I nearly brained the original doc when he said he could offer me a temp measure for 3 mths and then come back and see what happens poor hubby exploded. We are so close to little one and it was the first time ever I just felt like someone was telling me I wouldn't be a mum it was truely horrible experience. I am really glad we got to see the consultant that did the op he is really lovely and was so sorry he hadn't helped but he is going to do the bowel at the same time as the hysterectomy so will be all done and sorted soon. I really really can't believe they can keep you waiting that long have you spoken to PALS at the hospital surely under NHS guidelines they can't do it! Might be worth making yourself a regular visitor of the hospital A&E dept! I know my SIL does it frequently and it gets her what she wants! I feel so much for you massive massive   

Fab news Gertie, I think it makes a huge difference if you get on with SW I know i was massively reliefed when i noticed that ours got hubby's sense of humour its a bit unique bless him! Hope it all goes smoothly x

Sonia hope you don't have to wait too long, when are you going on hols? I bet there will be something when you come back. 

Hope everyone else is ok xx


----------



## loopy75

Hi people      I've not been on here for ages due to various reasons: Sent medical questionnaire back and was told to lose weight, wait 6 months since last shot at tx oh and explain why I was off work.  Got a letter from social work about beginning of decemeber asking us if we would like to continue as they hadn't received the medical paperwork back. Called them and explained we had sent it and we were waiting until after new year.    The new journey begins ............. Prep Group on Friday and really enjoyed this and feel they should put more info into the "info evening" as I remeber been very doubtful afterwards but 100% positive now and can't wait to get started.      Just caught up on the first page as there is loads to read but will get to know you all soon.      Hope everyone is well      Luv Loopy


----------



## Anjelissa

Just wanted to pop in and say hi to you all   , and once again good luck with all the various stages of the process that you are at right now.

Plus a big hug    to AAA and skyblu x x

Lots of love Anj x x


----------



## galaxy girl

Hi all- got good news yesterday - our first respite foster placement for a weekend - a seven month old !! very excited. Need to get the house baby proofed ASAP!

AAA - sorry about wait for op - glad its been reduced to what they orginally thought though.

great news gertie.
Glad things are starting to move Loopy..


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

GG yeah how exciting xx

Loopy welcome back x

Ang how is Nemo?

AFM well girls for the first time in this whole process I feel totally confused! Could just be the injection kicking in as I seem to rememeber going a bit ga ga on IVF DR drugs. I sent the letter from my consultant to our SW on Tues she rang last night and spoke to hubby she is going to speak to the head of the panel and her manager and see if we can still go to panel?!??!? Hubby said we'd like to be approved so at least we felt like we had reached that hurdle, our SW agreed as she has almost finished our PAR she is hoping to come back to us this wk so fingers crossed it will alll be ok but I feel lost today!


----------



## liveinhope

Will keep my fingers crossed for you AAA that you can still go to panel - lots of love to you!

AFM - 2nd prep group today - looking at attachment, so could be a heavy one! But it will be worth it when we have our children home with us

Have a great day everyone

xx


----------



## panorama

Hello everyone!

GG - how exciting! Hope it goes well! 

AAA & Skyblu -   Hope you can get your ops soon x

Gertie - that's great news   

Right no more time for personals, off to Thailand on saturday yay! This waiting is starting to do my head in and its only been less than 6 weeks!     just have to be patient!!   

p xx


----------



## Irishlady

Just wrote a long post with lots of personals but it has gone - grrrrrrrr!!

Sorry haven't time to do it all again but apols for not being on this board much, but I do still read your stories.

We have had 4 out of 6 prep sessions and going really well. However, we didn't warm to the sw we had for initial visit and she took our last prep course. She was awful, waffled on, spoke at us for the whole time, didn't ask for questions or initiated discussions etc.  If  we had her for initial visit does it bear any relevance on whether we will get her for homestudy? If we do get her is it entirely a massive no if we ask to change sw? My dh really doesn't like her and as the hs is such a personal and at times intrusive process I feel that he (and I) would find it much more beneficial if it was with someone we warmed to.  Sorry for waffling on....

Panorama have a fab hol!

AAA & Skyblu - thinking of you both and hope you hear about op dates soon.

Liveinhope - hope 2nd prep session goes well

Galaxy - great news about your foster placement

And hugs to the rest of you xxx


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi AAA,
Nemo's doing great thanks   
He's grown up so much in the 6 months he's been with us!   
He's walking all the time now and saying a few more words, such a clever boy.  

I have everything crossed that you are allowed to go to panel as planned. At least then you'll have that under your belt and can relax   . 

Lots of love Ang x x


----------



## waywardstork

Hello everyone. 

AAA, your post took me back.  Remember those drugs - how awful they make you feel, so emotional at times, out of control at others.  So tired too!  Hope your op is soon and you recover soon.  Hope panel is not delayed ... !

Irish lady - sorry  Ican't make any suggestions, but I do understand how you feel.  Although I don't have strong feelings about our sw from initial visit ... I did't feel that 'instant bond' that I have felt with some of the others during prep so far.  DH said he felt fine with her .... she just didn't seem to click with me.  I am trying to be open minded as  I am making a judgement based on one meeting ... she may be lovely when you get to know her.  We shall see. 
Not sure what advise to give you.  I wonder if anyone else has had this situation and what happened?

Liveinhope ....   need I say more?

hello  to everyone else!

Day 2 of our prep course today..... wow, brain is spinning.  Lots of info on attatchment, abuse - so much to think about and take in.  Was good though.  Feel a little overwhelmed by all that our child/children could have suffered and how I will deal with it all.  Got to have faith that I will cope and do well for our child/ren.  It all feels quite negative sometimes .... guess one has to be positive and trust that your child will not have ALL the problem they mentioned and that thre will be good times and lots of happy family time as well as the difficult periods. 

Got lots of reading to do again for next week .... will start tonight.  (esp as I know DH will be leaving his for the last minute and will need the book then! lol)

xxx
waywardstork


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Anj aw how lovely you must be so proud   

Waywardstork we found the prep course really negative and when we spoke to our SW about it she said unfortunately they have to be like it, in fact one of our days they dropped something off the agenda because it was SUCH a negative day they didn't want us going home on a complete sad note! 

Irishlady, I think you can say you would like another SW. The one we had for initial was different to our HS and I think our LA do that but as with everything with this process everyone is done differently! Hubby wasn't sure about ours at first but he gets on really well with her now and she even looked at him over the top of glasses the other day when he said something then started laughing LOL

Panaroma have a wonderful time I am sure you will hear something on your return x

Well we haven't heard anything today please    that they don't delay it I know it will happen eventually but part of me just feels like we need to have the YES (assuming we get a yes) out the way and we can then focus on me getting better and then Bubba coming home.


----------



## charlie_44

Just wanted to wish everyone a lovely weekend


----------



## pumpkin23

Hello everyone
Can I join your thread please.
My husband and I have started the adoption process, we have had our medicals,crb checks and our referees have filled out and returned their forms. We have been allocated a SW which we both like which hopefully will help with the HS which we start on Thursday (24th). I'm very nervous about what to expect.
I have been reading this thread and the adoption diaries (which made me cry) for a while, but as usual it takes me ages to pluck up the courage to post.
Hope you've all had a good weekend, back to work tomorrow (boo) at least I have a shorter week as we are off to London on Friday for our 7th Anniversary and are "off the see the Wizard of Oz" which I'm really looking forward to.
Take care everyone
Pumpkin23


----------



## charlie_44

Hi Pumpkin - just wanted to welcome you to the thread   

Off to watch Dancing On Ice now


----------



## libby29

Welcome pumpkin. we just finished our home study and actually really enjoyed it. It was no where near as bad as i thought it was going to be. It does help having a lovely social worker, ours was just like someone i would be friends with in "normal" life. Good luck for thursday, you'll be just fine. The first one is understandibly the most nerve racking. xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi Pumpkin we have also not long finished our HS and ours was fine they do like to go over and over stuff and think our favourtie question was "and how did that make you feel?" LOL I personally didn't think it was anywhere near as bad as people have said and we didn't have all that much homework either! The first is really nerve wracking but if you already know your SW it will be fine. Good Luck with the whole process xx

Hi to everyone else x


----------



## sonia7

Hi everyone


Hope you are all well.


We have received an invite to attend a one day training day on attachment on 4th May 2011 so that should be good, so booked the day off work early last week, then a few days later we get told our moving date to another office and another town for our work being on the same day as our training day and that the boss is not accepting anymore people to go on annual leave that day, so phew got my annual leave in just in time    It should be a good course.


Last week I went to my first zumba class OMG I nearly had all the 1.5 litre bottle of water,after each dance I kept saying to my friend OMG OMG I need Water, it was tough going but enjoyed it. Going again on Wednesday night   




Anyways will be in touch soon   Good luck for all your journeys to being a mummy and daddy.


Sonia xx


----------



## sweets x

Hi. 
Been awol again...sorry. 
Big hi to newbies since last posted. 
Sonia. Course sounds good. Were on a bringing children home course in April. 
Hope all home studies and prep courses are going well. 

Am not coping with waiting very well at all. Am all over the place. 
Feels like we have been abandoned by s/w and its only been a short while. How crazy is that?? She has sent our par's off and is waiting to hear about a few links. Why does it take so long. Is it cause they don't think weds a right match?

Sweets xx


----------



## Magoogle

Hi Guys

I hope you don't mind me joining your thread....I have my pre adoption course coming up which starts on the 5th April and i'm really nervous and unsure of what to expect..Like all of u it's been a roller coaster of fertility treatment....

Mags xx


----------



## sweets x

Hi mags, welcome to the thread, you'll get lots of support on here. Dh and I loved our prep course. Was nice to meet others in same situation. The course was very informative and upsetting at times, but its to show all aspects of adoption. Good luck on your journey xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

mags welcome everyone here is lovely and you will get loads of support. I was really nervous about the firsts of everything thinks its perfectly normal. My words of wisdom are take each step as it happens, we kinda thought right today is day one of prep course by 4 it will be finished and we will be another step nearer to being parents and its worked for me. Hope that makes sense I am waffling a lot today dah x

sweets hope something comes up soon xx


----------



## skyblu

Welcome Mags, I know what you mean, we start our prep course in June and the waiting is driving me 
You will get lots of support on hear and I am sure you will get more msg of advice.

Hi Sweets, just msgd you on the endo site.
So sorry you haven't been matched yet but I'm sure it wont be long and has got nothing to do with you or your dh, SS are just slow at sorting things out. If you are really worried give your SW a ring that's what she's there for. Good Luck.

AAA, How are you? x

Hi to anyone I missed.

Skyblu.xx


----------



## Magoogle

Hi Guys

Thanks for the lovely welcome, I think adoption is fate as I only phoned 2 days ago and prep course is on the 5th April...We had gone to the initial info evening over a year ago...I'm from NI so not sure if it is done slightly different over here....but heres hoping that our little family will be complete soon...
and lots of luck to everyone else xxxx


----------



## charlie_44

Hi and welcome Magoogle   

sweets - I hope you hear something soon   it must be really frustrating 

Hi everyone else


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Mags it sounds like its meant to me hun x

Skyblu I am amazing feeling really well the prostrap injection has made a massive difference and I can walk again and with speed as well its great my leg is achey but think thats cause i am using muscles I haven't used for months. Have you heard any more? I really hope you don't have to wait too long x


----------



## Adam_Claire

Hi All,

So, the good news is that after our 6 month wait following our last ivf treatment, we have just booked a date for our first home visit (in a few weeks time, this is with Bristol btw), but the bad news is, assuming we get selected we will miss the June prep course since the selection for that is happening today! So (assuming we get selected) we have to wait until September until the next prep course. Grrrrrrrrr.

The adoption process seems to be 

wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait activity wait wait wait wait wait activitywait wait wait wait  etc...

Its enough to drive you mad...how you you keep your sanity?


----------



## libby29

AC...I know how you feel. We had to wait 8 months after our initial visit for prep. Although we were allowed to use this as our ....after tx wait, which was good. Its really tough waiting but we've found that once prep was over things have really flown by and are moving really quickly. All areas are different of course. The only long wait we had was for prep. Of course we haven't been to panel yet but its booked and not to far off. I am though preparing myself for a long wait while they match us with a child. Although our sw has already said she has approached her manager about 4 children she thinks we would be perfect for (thats all we know). So maybe our child is already linked to us....or maybe i'm wishful thinking!   Sorry i'm waffling now......just wanted to say once things get started it can move very quickly so take this time to enjoy being a couple. XXXXX


----------



## Adam_Claire

Libby, thanks for the reply...
"so take this time to enjoy being a couple"
This is a lovely sentiment, and we will try, but you know how it is, a lot easier said than done.

On another note, on several occasions we had talked about getting a dog, and now seems like an excellent time, but i am sure we had heard that LA's wouldnt consider you if you had a dog...

Anyone know anything about this??


----------



## Miny Moo

We had 2 dog's throughout our assessment and when our son was placed, you have to fill in doggy questionnaires, and our 2 dog's were great when our son came, as he was older 6 yrs at placement he would often use the dogs as comfort if that makes sense.


----------



## Adam_Claire

Moo, would that be Bristol per chance?


----------



## charlie_44

Adam_Claire said:


> The adoption process seems to be
> 
> wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait activity wait wait wait wait wait activitywait wait wait wait etc...
> 
> Its enough to drive you mad...how you you keep your sanity?


Adam_Claire -   I agree! We are waiting for HS to begin and I'm now starting to check the phone lots! I agree with what Libby says to enjoy time as a couple as once things do move they move quickly.

Libby - hope your wait isn't too long


----------



## libby29

A.C,  Don't know what others think but i would be very careful about getting a dog at this stage. The reason i say this is we have 2 cats and sw and la were fine with this but did say that they prefer no dogs. Having said that another couple on our hs have dogs and as yet this hasn't been a problem. Sw also said though at prep that its not during hs that dogs are a huge concern but they may be with childs sw who are trying to match. Not trying to put a dampner on your idea but just wanted you to be aware of what we were told. I love dogs and really wanted one but hubby said "look, we are trying to sell ourselves to a childs sw and that sw may hate dogs". How you can hate them i'm not sure, but we've decided to wait. Wouldn't hurt just to give your la a quick call and see what they think of dogs, they may give you some advice. Hope this helps. xx


Charlie...Hi there and thanks. Hows your wait for hs going? xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi ac you have got it hun mind you ours has been more action action action now we are on the waiting stage and somehow thing we might be on for a LONG WAIT but we will get there. Would defo give them a  ring about the dog especially as you won't have had it long and won't really know what it is like. 

Libby hope you don't have long to wait, x

Hope everyone is ok xx


----------



## libby29

Thanks AAA, Thanks and right back at you! x
Would you mind me picking your brains about how your panel went? Questions they asked ect..
Got ours soon and feeling a bit ekk now! lol x


----------



## pumpkin23

Hello everyone, hope your all ok
We had our SW visit today - she has booked all of our HS appointments and also gave us a possible panel date (3rd Aug). Finally feel that things are starting to happen now. Scary!
We are off to London tomorrow for the weekend, really looking forward to seeing The Wizard of Oz tomorrow night.
Take care
Pumpkin23


----------



## peanut butter

Hi Ladies

I have been reading this thread for ages but thought I would wait until we started our prep course in May before joining in so that I had lots to talk about.  Unfortunately, we have now been told that we won't be on our course until July (and even this is not definite!!).  Trying to keep my chin up but I just desperately want to get started.  

Good luck to everyone for whatever stage you are at.  

Love 
PB


----------



## 02cindy

Evening ladies

Wow there are a lot of new faces  to all the new faces..

I have not posted again for ages as nothing was happening, however, we went to the adoption office today to hand in our forms and for them to take copies of identity documents.  They are now saying that we will get on a prep course whilst waiting for the CRB's to come back..but this could take a couple of months..They have them monthly but I suppose depending on people's circumstances, some cancel, change their minds due to work, holidays etc.  We have a few trips booked and are in the middle of re-decorating so we are going to take this time to enjoy 'being a couple' although we have been doing this for the last 10 years   , so I am ready to get going.  

On the subject of dogs, we have a 2year old furbaby and our SW did not seem to mind - I think they are more concerned about the 'dangerous dogs' list, but as with everything each agency appears to have differing views. 

Did any of you girls ask your personal referee's what questions they were asked? I am intrigued..

Well off to walk same said furbaby as he has gone to sleep under the sofa...  

Cindy.x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Libby we should be going to panel on 27 April but he might be postponed due to my pending op waitng (there is that word again LOL) to hear from our SW she is on leave this wk was going to try and get back to us at the end of last wk or her manager was going to ring this week we haven't heard a thing. I am kinda hoping we will get a letter tomorrow or Sat from hospital giving me a date for op so at least we will know.

When is it my turn.... Soon hun and hope it won't be too much longer x

Peanut Butter aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh


----------



## libby29

AAA oh sorry hun, i get confused some times on here  i thought you had done panel, i'm a dumbo sorry! lol.  They haven't got back to you, god thats so annoying! Your having an op? everything comes at once doesn't it?!  I hope you get to hear soon hun, soooo much waiting.  xxx

Hi to all you other ladies joining us in our wait to start the future we crave! xxxxxx


----------



## Adam_Claire

Its seems that all your stories are punctuated with a long wait at some point or other, it doesnt really make it any easier but I suppose is sort of reassurring to know.
Keep ourselves busy, book lots of hols to focus on etc etc...
I think the worst wait for us will be the time from our home visit in April, just to August when will will find out if we have been selected to go forward to the prep course (in Sept), once we know we have been selected, the fact that we are definitely 'on the road' should make the waiting a little easier..
Anyway, hope you are all well, sorry this mail is a bit me me me, us us us...


----------



## galaxy girl

Potential match. Freaking out! Don't have much info as yet.


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps..just a.quickie as been on the wine and a.bit tipsy lol. 
G G. Good.luck on link hun. When do u find out more.
When is it.my.turn. Hope.your not waiting much longer

Always. Hugs hun, hope your ok.  

Libby. Hi hun. 

Hope everyone else is ok. 

We have s/w coming Monday morning to discuss some children with us, am so excited. Roll on Monday lol


Nite nite

Sweets xx


----------



## Magoogle

Good luck for Mon sweets xx

And to everyone else on the waiting game!

Mags xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

GG yeah fingers crossed xx

Sweets sounds like Monday then hun x

Libby don't worry hun I am always getting people muddled. Yeah I am on the waiting list for keyhole hysterectomy, we had kinda hoped we might have got a date this wk but unless the postman brings something today not looking likely. I am sure we will hear from SW next wk as she said we should have our PAR by the end of March but ha ho knowing her it will be April bless her she does make us laugh we are both time keeping freaks and SW is total opposite i think she arrived on time once in the 7 visits we had dah!

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend x


----------



## sweets x

Mags- thanku. Hope your ok. 

Always- praying Mr postie brings what u want xx


----------



## watakerfuffle

Hi All

We have now been to both our info days with the two different LA's, interestingly they were both quite different. Once we attended the first I was sure we would go with them but now we have attended the second LA's info day I know that they are the one's for us as they just felt right. Also funnily enough someone I knew was there giving a talk about there own experience about adopting which I had know idea about so that kind of made it for me!

I am feeling so much more positive now but seriously scared at the same time in case we are rejected :O(

Actually whilst I am here has anyone any experience of the following.... We live and share a house with my dad, its a large house with 2 spare  bedrooms and 2 living rooms and we have turned the utility into a small kitchen so that we can have our own separate space if we want. My dad is happy to have any checks etc done but do you think we will be turned away because of this?

Thanks all and hoping all your journeys are going well :O)


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

watakerfuffle, hi pleased you have made the decision i don't see why it would make any difference but would imagine they will wanna do as many checks on your dad as you but I could be totally wrong. Good Luck xx

sweets postie didn't bring the right letter    guess there is still monday as hubby is on early shift this wk so we won't be here to speak to her until the afternoon! You watch she'll tell us we can't go and the postie will bring the letter dah oh well what will be will be!

Hope everyone else is ok

We are off for lunch with our prep course group today so should be good to see how everyone is doing x


----------



## charlie_44

Hiya   

Libby - I'm chomping at the bit now for HS to start, hopefully it shouldn't be long now from what they said!

peanutbutter - hi and welcome   

Cindy - hope prep course isn't to long coming

GG - good luck with the potential match   

Sweets - hope all goes well on Monday   

waterkerfuffle - I know what you mean about feeling positive but scared of being rejected at the same time - the scared bit gets less though and though I never take it for granted I can see me being a mummy now one day   

AAA - hope you enjoyed the lunch

Hi to everyone else   hope things are going well


----------



## 02cindy

Hi girls

GG - OOh so exciting, cant wait to hear more about the potential match..Good luck.

Sweets - Good luck for Monday    

Charlie - Hope you get the date for prep course through soon.  

AAA - Hope you enjoyed your lunch

Peanutbutter -  and welcome.

Hi to everyone else, hope you enjoyed your weekends.

Cindy.x


----------



## sweets x

Waterkafuffle- glad u had found a la to go with  

Always- any luck with post today. Hope u had a nice lunch. We are meeting a couple from ours tomorrow and am looking forward to it. 

Charlie44- hope prep group soon hurries up for you

GG- how'd today go? 

O2cindy- hope your ok 

Hi to everyone else adds

Well, we have said yes to a match today. Just     we are the only ones interested. S/w is contacting their s/w today. Am sooo excited, yet nervous incase things go wrong. We both cried when s/w left as we were sat holding a photo of what could be our girls. We rang s/w as soon as she got to her office  
Feels so surreal and really hard to stay grounded. 

Take care

Sweets xx


----------



## watakerfuffle

GG and Sweets... wow mega exciting and nerve racking time for you both. Hope it all works out. Can't imagine what it must feel like to be matched with potential daughters/sons but here's hoping one day I will!! Look forward to hearing more news x


----------



## galaxy girl

Sweets how exciting!!!  

We are no further forward as yet - will hopefully know more on Wed.


----------



## liveinhope

Great news sweets! Will   all goes smoothly

Keep us posted
xx


----------



## libby29

sweets thats brilliant news hun!    Well done and and sending you lots of good luck that these are your girls. xx


----------



## GERTIE179

JUst wanted to say congrats sweets that is wonderful news    that this is the one for you
G x


----------



## Poochie1111

Sweets - that's great news!!  Got everything crossed for you.     

AAA - hope the postman brought you the news you wanted to hear today

GG - bet you're chopping at the bit. Roll on Weds.

Peanutbutter - welcome!

 all xx


----------



## Anjelissa

Evening all,

I don't post much, but still look in from time to time to see how everyone is 

I just wanted to say.....
Huge congratulations sweets!!   
I remember that moment like it was yesterday, you'll never forget it!
I hope it all moves quickly and smoothly for you. x

AAA.....I hope you had a good lunch with your prep group.  
We're in contact with 4 couples from our prep group and I have weekly play dates with 2 of the girls (another due to join us soon when her little one moves in).
It's really great to have a group of friends who truly understand the whole process and beyond etc, plus who you shared some of the journey with.  
I hope you get that letter soon hun. x 
I hope everyone's well, and hi to all the new comers 

Love Anj x x


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls 

Just popping on to say -Soooooooooooooooo Exciting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to Sweets, I truly hope that these are your daughters    

GG - Hoping for more news for you on Wednesday.

I am off to bed ladies, I am whacked

catch up properly tomorrow.

night.xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Sweets wonderful news so pleased for you, we too are meeting a couple tomorrow night lOL

Anj your play dates sound great, can't wait! Hope you are all ok xx

Thanks everyone   no letter   no phone call, I have been at home sick today I am coughing all night long and can't sleep poor hubby looks shattered bless him have given up already tonight and I am on the sofa LOL (hubby is on early shift so early bed week). We had a lovely lunch yesterday 1 couple have postponed the process and 2 others didn't come but was great to catch up with everyone I couldn't talk when we got home my voice is very fragile at the mo. We are meeting a couple using same LA tomorrow they were approved about a month ago so are a little bit further on than us but our SW was really keen for us to meet couples who had or who were adopting locally so fingers crossed we will have a fab support network of people in a stones throw from our front door.


----------



## Arrows

Not been on in ages!

My cousin who has 4 children from her first marriage (bad situation and she then had tubes tied), has just undergone IVF with her new partner (who was her high school sweetheart and they're now engaged) and told me that she's pregnant -official test day is tomorrow. I know for many this is a difficult situation to accept but her circumstances are very different now to what they were, and I am pleased for her though of course a little jealous. I've been supporting her throughout her treatment.
This has had me reminiscing and thinking about our own treatment and the possibility of doing another cycle, though even if we did, we'd have to wait another couple of years for it to be free.
They decided that I now have Endo so been on the pill for for some time now and it really is wonderful not to experience so much pain each month.
The last 5 weeks have not been good for me. My back went 5wks ago -went into total spasms and lots of pain. I'm still signed off work with it and on strong painkillers. They've discovered it's all down to sciatica which they can sort but only once the spasming stops, so got to take anti-spasmodics regularly for a week, then the physio can start. Then 2wks ago I had the norovirus sickness bug and ended up at the after hours clinic to get anti-sickness jab and wouldn't stop. Last week I lost my voice and had a cough, though thankfully mainly all back now, just a bit gruff, and 2 days ago I badly sprained my ankle, pulling/tearing 2 of the 3 ligaments. Thankfully it's already healing well and can put weight on to walk through not far -I have a zimmer frame to use as can't have crutches or a stick because of my back.
I bring new meaning to walking wounded!!!!
Adoption-wise we've received a good reference from our prep course and now really need to get in the form we've been sat on now for nearly 2 months -only the personal statement left to do. 
I'm concerned that they won't want to do anything with my back as it is too but also starting to wonder and question myself about our delaying.  Am starting to think that I'm not ready to give up on having our own and wondering if it's time me and DH sat down and started to discuss it all again.


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Just popping on to say congratulations to sweets!!! What a very exciting time. Hope all goes well.     

We have also been matched with a little boy of 2yrs and just waiting for it to all go through now. Panel 12th May. EEK!!!    We haven't seen a picture yet though which I find really frustrating, I think our LA are quite reluctant to give pictures too early. It won't make any difference to us saying yes or no but I would like to know what he looks like!! Keep collecting odd bits and pieces for him now but very scared to get too much incase things go wrong.

Also good luck to GG for tommorrow, hope you find out more news regarding your potential match

Hope everyone else is tickity boo.

Love Mrs Dibbles


----------



## charlie_44

Just popping on qucikly to say   to sweets and to Mrs Dibbles - fantastic news for you both      hope all goes well


----------



## Belliboo

Sweets & mrs dibbles congratulations on getting potential matches must be so exciting 

Arrows hope your feeling better soon

AAA hope your feeling better soon too

GG good luck tomorrow 

We going to approval panel on Monday, feeling nervous already so dread to think how I'll be on Monday, does anyone remember what sort of questions will they ask us

Anyway hope everyone else is ok sending lol to everyone xxx


----------



## Magoogle

Congrats and good luck to sweets and Mrs Dibbles xxxx


----------



## Anjelissa

In addition to my last post....

Huge Congratulations to Mrs.Dibbles  that's brilliant news!! 

Luv Anj x


----------



## 02cindy

Evening girls

MrsDibbles -  on your match, so exciting...it is all happening on here at the moment - all really positive which is great to read   

Rachel - I have not been to panel yet, but our SW said that they never take anyone to panel if they do not think they will be approved - so it seems it is more of a formality than a test..Good luck I am sure you will both be fine.  

Cindy.xx


----------



## skyblu

Just popping in to say   sweets and Mrs Dribbles.

AAA , I hope you get your letter soon, there is nothing worse than waiting waiting and waiting.
I hope you don't mind me asking but how come you are having a keyhole hysterectomy when you have endo or have I got that bit wrong 

Hi to every one
Skyblu.x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

skyblu my consultant wants to do it that way, he is a bit of keyhole wizz by the sounds of it so going with what he says but yeah I do have endo and he feels it will be much better for me, he said a abdominal cut would be his absolute last option and he can't do it vaginaly because the fibroids are pushing everything backwards. Don't mind you asking hun sorry if TMI. 

Mrs Dribbles hope you see a pic soon x

Arrows sounds like you have well and truely been in the wars, I hope they can sort your back out soon and you try and stay out of the wars hun xx

Rachel we haven't been to panel but I was under the impression the questions are on the PAR? 

Well girls we had the phone call from our SW yesterday and guess what we got a BFN she has had to pull us from panel on the 27 April the panel manager said he couldn't approve us until I have had my op and I am fully recovered      we are both devastated. SW is going to finish writing the PAR and post it too us and then come and see us so guess the WAIT WAIT WAIT starts here. Sorry to drag things down as it really is such a positive thread x


----------



## liveinhope

Sorry to hear that AAA


----------



## Magoogle

Really sorry to hear that always, hopefully time will go quickly xxxx


----------



## Anjelissa

Oh AAA, I'm so sorry hun    

I hope the time passes as quickly as possible and you make a speedy recovery. x x

It's not a 'BFN' it's a 'DARFOSBBOTA' (delayed-awaiting-recovery-from-op'-soon-be-back-on-track-again).  
My thoughts are with you and sending you a big hug   

Love Anj x x


----------



## Duckling

Hi everyone,
Just checking in to say hello. I'm not very good at keeping in regular touch. Sweets & Mrs Dibbles - it sounds so exciting! I'll be reading for the latest instalments.
AAA you poor thing, this waiting business!  Really hope you're sorted asap and things get back on track. x
Arrows, hope you're feeling better soon too and get your head around what to do next. In a way my age helped make up our minds once and for all - I imagine the 'what if...' must be very different when you're younger.
Rachel good luck for Monday - very exciting!
Hi to everyone else. Hope I haven't forgotten something important - I should post more often to keep up!
Been doing LOADS of homework ready for next social worker visit. Didn't really click at first visit, she was quite strict and I wanted to say 'but we're really nice and good and hard working!'    Hope she gets us more as the weeks go on.
Duckling x


----------



## Adam_Claire

Duckling, what do you mean in terms of homework?
We have our first sw visit in a couple of weeks and desperate to make a good impression....I would hope our personalities would come through but maybe as you say this isnt always the case?


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks everyone still    lots and to top it all off AF arrived today I haven't had one since Aug been on pill, then had a coil in Dec and then the prostrap injection 2 wks ago has come as a shock really didn't expect to see that it never rains but it pours i guess. 

Anj thanks hun made me smile x

Duckling we had a fair bit of homework after our first visit but we didn't really get anymore after that for some reason the other people on our prep course have had lots its weird. We were also not sure about our SW and it took a couple of visits for us to click with her but now we get on really well and I am sure she felt awful making that phone call yesterday!


----------



## Poochie1111

Good luck with your match Mrs Dibbles. Great news.   

AAA - so sorry that your panel date has been moved.  How frustrating for you when you are at the final post as well. I can quite understand that you're upset by it all. I can't remember if you had a date yet for your op (I don't think so)? Hope this comes along quickly for you    

Hi to all x


----------



## charlie_44

AAA - sorry to hear your news, it will happen though, hold onto that (though that won't help much at the moment)   

Adam_Claire and Duckling - we have been left lots of homework to get started on before HS starts.  Think all LA's do it differently though as some just seem to chat each week and 'draw' out info from you.  We've had to write stuff about family background, our relationship, school and work experience, etc, etc, etc   

Rachel - Good luck for Monday   

Hi everyone else


----------



## Duckling

Adam-Claire didn't mean to worry you - especially when everyone here is so encouraging.
We met the social worker in charge for our initial visit and she was lovely. Hoping that this one was just laying down the law and once she gets to know us it will be fine. (AAA I love it when what you say agrees with what I'm hoping  .)
We have to write about our relationships with others, childhood, education, hobbies, jobs, childhood etc. which I'm pretty sure everyone has to. Also fill in a financial form, complete a family tree and map of people who can support us. Think AAA might be right (hoping anyway) that this is the heaviest in one go. I want everything to be perfect too so may be going into too much detail. Have a very heavy workload at work at the moment too, which is why it probably seems even more hard going.
Duckling x


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Always-      So sorry you have had to put on hold things. Really hope time passes quickly for you xx

Hope everyone else is doing ok x x x

Regarding homework, we had loads, emails with questions and lots home study and prep group homework, more than the other people in our prep group. However, we also had quite a short homestudy and think thats because we did that much homework she knew alot about us, Hope that makes sense.

Have had a real topsy turvy day today. Our link isn't as straight forward as first thought. There are other couples involved too and we have to ait and see if the childrens s/w actually wants to see us. Our s/w said that the childrens worker seemed positive.
Trying to be optomistic but its really hard.

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## skyblu

AAA, I am so sorry     
I really hope you get that op asap and you can start moving on.

Sweets,    thinking of you and dh.

Skyblu .xx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks everyone had a major meltdown last night haven't done that since our last IVF I can't believe how hard I am taking it. I know its only a delay and I know it will happen and most importantly I know I need my op to make me the mum I wanna be. Think we just need a bit of good news. 
One advantage of having a really great prep course group is we have been able to talk things through and it certainly makes you realise that every couple even with the same SW is processed differently. We seemed to have had the least homework and the fewest visits very weird but we are also both very open books so she has had our live story on all 7 visits poor lady LOL

Anyway I am waffling 

Sweets fingers crossed nothing is ever easy is it xx


----------



## Adam_Claire

thnaks all for the updates, we never appreciated you were set homework by the sw's, thought you were doing something off your own backs...thnaks


----------



## charlie_44

sweets -   that all will go well for you


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Rachel- best of luck for Monday 

Always- hope your bearing up ok hun, thinking of you. 

Hope everyone else is ok. 

Still not heard from children's social worker 
The days are dragging, now ours is off till tues. Keep thinking we wouldn't have the girls cpr's if they weren't interested in us. 

Take care 

Sweets xx


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi all,
Just a quick one to say...

Sweets....I'm thinking of you, and have everything crossed   

Love Anj x


----------



## AoC

Hi ladies - 'scuse me butting in.

Can anyone recommend good, free, online software for building a family tree?  I'm a bit bemused by all the sites out there.  

Thank you!


----------



## galaxy girl

Lost a post so will try again!

AoC - I made our own afterlooking at some templates on line - whatever came up on google.

Sweets - nightmare . 

AAA - waiting sucks. hope you get you op soon and recover quickly!

as for us we are  not pursuing our link as its for 3 children and we have been approved for 2 - we discussed it over and over and feel 3 may be too much for us as i will have to return to work in time. its heartbraking though - would have loved to proceed.


----------



## Guest

Big ((hugs)) - however hearbreaking it is, I am glad you have made the right decision for you.

Bop


----------



## Poochie1111

Sweets - keep positive.  Really hope you get some good news next week    

GG - sorry that this link itsn't the right one. I imagine it's very hard to say no, but it has to be 100% right for you and the little ones.  They are waiting for you just around the corner    
AoC -   hello.  Haven't seen you for ages (we were on the Leeds thread together). Hope you are well. Sorry I can't help with the family tree

AAA -    

Well, I'm just so glad it's April now.  Only one month away until we can get going. Managed to keep myself incredibly busy in March so need to do the same over April and hopefully it will fly by...

x


----------



## Arrows

AoC, I use ancestry and pay monthly but you can use genesreunited for free as far as i'm aware and that's ok for building the tree but very expensive for research.
Family tree maker is a good application if you want to just run a program on your computer and sure you can get downloads that are free somewhere on the net.


----------



## panorama

Hi everyone!

GG -    I see you have had to turn down a match, so hard!   

Sweets - everything crossed for you!!    

Haven't had a chance to read back so will do this weekend  Just got back from holiday in Thailand which was lovely although the sun disappeared during our time in Phuket replaced by lots of rain, oh well....    Was still nice   

Got back to an email from our SW with a lovely profile for a 7 month old little boy who seems perfect, but trying to keep it together just in case!  Emailed her back to express interest so should find out more soon if they would like to consider us    

Love panorama xx


----------



## GERTIE179

Jusy a quick one from me today

Galaxy Girl - so sorry this is not the right match for you.  Hope you get the right one v soon   
Sweets - good luck on your match  
Panorama - ooh very exciting. fingers crossed   
Poochie - hope the next month flies by for you
AoC - Good Q re the family tree and I have found the info given by the ladies really helpful too.
Love to everyone I may have missed.

Luv Gertie
X


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

CG so sorry it must be hard saying no x

Panaroma hope you had a lovely despite the rain. I had a feeling you would have a potential match on your return x

Sorry can't help with the family tree x

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend x


----------



## charlie_44

Panaroma - welcome back and wishing you lots of luck   

Poochie - hope May comes round quickly for you 

GG - sorry it didn't work out but hope you get the right match soon   

AoC - sorry, I can't help 

Hi everyone else, hope you're all enjoying the weekend   

We're still waiting to hear from SS to tell us when HS will begin - the call is due anytime now but I'm getting more impatient by the day - gwad help me further down the line


----------



## AoC

Thanks for the tips, everyone!  Much appreciated.  

Good luck!


----------



## Magoogle

Hi guys

my first day of my prep course is tomorrow and I am really really nervous and excited at the same time....will keep u posted.   
Good luck to everyone else xxxx


----------



## Maccer

Hello All,


I'm back!!! I hope you are all keeping well?  I see some that I started out with have made so much progress.  We are still at the beginning of the Journey, currently on a prep course.  We had to wait a year to ensure that we wouldn't start smoking again, so happy to be back on the road though.  


I am just trying to catch up with everyone old and new, will update my diary in a bit.  

Maccer


----------



## Belliboo

Hi 

hope everyones ok

Just to say we are now approved adopters been to panel today & got approved yippee, & now the waiting begins !! xxx


----------



## sweets x

hiya peeps

Racheal- CONGRATULATIONS      

Maccer- welcome back hunny x x 

Magoogle- lots of luck for tomorrow, you will be fine 

AoC- hope you got familytree sorted

Charlie44- Hope your hear soon

Panaorama-     hope all goes good for you

Gertie, always, Poochie, arrows, anj,and Bop- hope your all ok.

GG- bless you saying no, its so hard, i cried for days after turning down our first link.    

Hi to anyone i have missed.

Still not heard from s/w, but she has been off for a few days, should be back in the office tomorrow. So, have emailed her and added a read reciept to see when she reads it. Am officially a stalker     
We have finished the spare room pink...pink..and more pink. Keep looking at it    
Hope we hear either way if the little one's s/w wants to see us soon, i'm going crazy.

Night night all

sweets x x


----------



## Poochie1111

Rachel - congratulations on getting approved!!!  Hope you don't have to wait too long    

Maccer - hello. It's frustrating having to wait - i can't relate to that.  It's great things are moving for you now.

Magoogle - good luck with your prep course.

Charlie - hope you get that phone call sooner rather than later

Panorama - Thailand - how lovely!! (except for the rain   ).  Hope you get some good news soon on your potential link

Sweets - hello. The bedroom sounds fab.  Very exciting. Hope oyu get some good news from your s/w tomorrow


----------



## liveinhope

Congratulations Rachel, hope your wait is not too long.

We have our last prep group on Friday then onto home study.  Things are getting closer.......

Managed mothers day better this year than I have in the past - I wonder why?!?!

xx


----------



## panorama

LIH - great stuff, once you start hs time really flies! Mothers Day this year did not bother me at all, just kept thinking how nice it will hopefully be next year   

Poochie - not long to go now   

Sweets - everything crossed for you today!! I also stalk my sw (nicely   ). Bedroom sounds fab, we are holding off until we know for sure but already been broswing some website    

Rachel -    Great news, lets hope you don't have to wait long!

Maccer - well done on your smoking! Welcome back!   

Magoogle - hope it goes well today, enjoy!

Charlie - hope you get the call soon! 

AOC - haven't had to do one myself but I know you can get software for it for not much

AAA - seen that they have postponed panel for you     So sorry to hear this, must be so hard, really hope the op can happen as soon as possible   

Hello to everyone else, think I have hopefully caught up on news now! SW emailed yest to say our forms have been passed on to child's SW and we should hear back in about a couple weeks, need another holiday to make time fly again    Fingers crossed, been a bit jetlagged and been waking up really early and then can't go back to sleep thinking about it all! Going slightly    already I think!! Must keep it together....   

p xx


----------



## sweets x

hiya peeps

Liveinhope- hope you enjoy home study, we did. Found out stuff about my DH that i didn't know and we've been together 16yrs     

Panorama- Will help you wish away 2 wks, have you met woth little one's s/w yet??

Hope everyone is ok.

Am super hyper at moment. S/w rang, littlies s/w wants to meet us and is comin 2wks today. There are other people in the frame but she isn't aranging to see them till after she has seen us as is excited about us     
Can't get this massive grin off my face, haven't seen hubby yet and can't wait to hug him   

They are keen cause i am going to be a stay at home mum and were not far from contact for intro's etc....

Off to get ready as going out for tea.

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## panorama

Sweets - WOWWWEEEEEEEE!!!!! Have a big grin for you too, great news!! Sure they will love you    How old are the girls? 

We have just expressed interest so the social worker should get our info soon before deciding whether to shortlist us, our LA normally shortlists and visits 2 couples, but we know that at the mo they don't have many couples outside area like us so we are hopeful    

Let's hope next 2 weeks go quickly eh!   

panorama xxxxx


----------



## sweets x

P- i hope so, was just gonna grill ya about questions etc... lol 
the girls are one and three x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Rachel well done hope the next bit isn't too much waiting x

Sweets Fab news fingers crossed its so frusting all this waiting can't she come and see you tomorrow    LOL

Hi to everyone else xx

AFM My hysterectomy is on the 19th April it is now not being done by keyhole because of the size of one of my fibroids    means I am gonna have to do another lot of googling LOL. So pleased we have got a date and it will be 8 yrs since I met hubby so don't think we will be going out celebrating that night maybe he can bring me in something nice


----------



## Poochie1111

AAA - that's good you've got your date so soon although sorry it's not the procedure you wanted. Hopefully it won't be too long after until you can get your revised panel date

Sweets - fab news!!  Roll on the next two weeks. Have you seen photos yet?

Panorama - great news about you too.


----------



## skyblu

AAA - So pleased you have a date for your hysterectomy, It might not be the way you want it but if your fibroids are so big it is the safest way. 
I hope you will be able to get a new panel date soon after your op and start your family.
I saw my consultant yesterday and I will be having a hysterectomy and he is hopefull I will have it done in the next 6 months, which is a little better than 8/12 months like I was told a few weeks ago.
The trouble is because my hysterectomy is complected they have to make sure there are 4 surgeons free on the same day and that is why I have to wait so long.
I will still see the gyne in my local hospital when I get the appointment to see if they can do it sooner.
As my op will be in October time and our prep training starts in July do you think that maybe we will be near a panel date by then and do you think we should tell our s/w what is going on.
What I am worried about is that they will cancel the prep course and we will have to wait until next year for the next one. What would you do?

Sweets - Congrats and lets hope the next two weeks go quickly. Good Luck. 

Rachel - Congrats on approval. Well done. 

Skyblu.xx


----------



## Magoogle

Hi guys

AAA thats great news, at least you have some kind of a time frame..

Congrats Sweets, Panarama and Rachael..

Well my first day on the prep course wasn't as bad as I thought and I didn't know anyone (the intro evening I went to my aunt was there...). There was quite a lot to take in but def going to go down the rocky road. Although they did mention that when you get a child placed with you, you have to take six months off work? Hopefully the next 3 days of the course will go as smooth..

Good luck to everyone xxxx


----------



## Boggy

Hi magoogle

Glad your first day at prep went well    Always a nerve wracking experience!

Yes, you are more than likely expected to take at least 6 months off work - preferably a year.  You do however get financial support in the form of Statutory Adoption Pay, child benefit and Tax credits - more details in the resource area.  

Some children need a parent home until school age - both mine came with an adoption allowance to allow me to stay home so support is out there  

Hope the course continues to go smoothly 

bx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Skyblu have pm'd you. Really pleased you are getting somewhere at last.

Mag pleased the first day has gone well, we have made some lovely friends off our prep course all met up last weekend for a catch up. 

Thanks everyone freaking out a bit tonight bit confused by the letters from the hospital roll on Monday when I have my pre op I have a list of questions and can hopefully sort out my confusion


----------



## Miny Moo

magoogle

Our son was school age when he came home so I had intended to just take off the 6 months, we soon decided though that he really needed me to be at home full time, we do have and adoption allowence which helps a little, and hubby is self employed and was able to up his hours a bit, we also get DLA, something I would never have though of applying if our SW had not tol us to do it.

It will also be a good thing if in a competative match if you are able to take as much time off work as possible.


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Great news Sweets and fingers crossed for you panorama.   

It was our social workers matching meeting yesterday and our social worker phoned to confirm that we are now the only couple in the running. Intros should be starting first week in June!!!! Decorating little ones room and frantically buying things now. We finally get to see some pictures in the next few days and I can't wait to put them up in the front room. Sending our pics to his foster carers so she can start introducing us. 

I am so very excited I could burst!!!!!


----------



## Poochie1111

Mrs Dibbles - that brilliant news.  Congratulations!!  No wonder you're smiling. You must be so excited!!   

I hadn't heard of an adoption allowance.  Hopefully our SW will give us some more details but it sounds like I need ot do a bit of google research.


----------



## Duckling

Hi all,
Just catching up on all your news.
Mrs Dibbles it sounds so exciting! Reading your post gives me hope.
Wow Panorama - sounds wonderful for you too!
Charlie - hope you hear soon about home study. It was really weird. They told us not to expect to hear until after Easter and for once I calmed down and went with the flow - then we had a 'phone call!
Rachel - wonderful news. Congratulations!
Sweets - sounds fabulous!
AAA - glad you've got a date, sorry it's not keyhole. The sooner it happens now the sooner it's over with. x
Hi to everyone else, hope you're ok.
Had second home study visit this week, much better. Thinks she realises we are nice people and there's no need to be quite so strict.
Friday tomorrow!   Have a great weekend.
Duckling xxx


----------



## Miny Moo

poochie1111

Adoption allowances tend to be given for children who have more needs, when we were being matched with our son we never thought about an adoption allowance, his family finder just rung me up one day and said that she had gotten her manager to agree to it because it was felt that he would need additional support and they felt it would benefit him to keep me home as long as possible.

It's always worth enquiring about though when you are matched with a child.


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Mrs Dibbles    fab news smiling for you x

Ducklin LOL see you were right pleased its all going well you will be finished them in no time x

Well its officially the weekend for me yeah back on Tues then it will only be a week till my op gulp!


----------



## Anjelissa

Mrs Dibbles.....that's wonderful news! 
It's such an amazing moment when you see their photo for the first time, both myself and DH got a bit tearful. I hope it all moves quickly and smoothly for you     

Luv Anj x


----------



## liveinhope

Great news Mrs Dibbles!


----------



## panorama

Morning!

AAA - not long for op then, hope it goes well   

Skyblu - hope you get on the prep course. Hard decision but I guess if it was me I would be honest about it all and hopefully they will be ok about you going on the prep course, fingers crossed!   

Magoogle - glad first day went well    I think they do like you to take a year off, but prob depends on childs age etc.

Mrs Dibbles - FAB news!!!   Not long to go now! Is it a boy or girl? And how old?  Can't believe they have not shown you a photo yet, would love to be a fly on the wall when you see it   

Poochie - adoption allowance is like the equivalent of maternity pay I think? Your employer should have some sort of adoption policy so check it out. But yes there is additional support for certain children I think too.

Duckling - glad hs is going well   

Sweets - going crazy yet??    

Loving this weather, may be going to Ikea tomorrow to get a new wardrobe, need more storage as we are merging DH's and my study together so we can sort out the kiddy room    But have deckchairs out in garden too!

No more news yet....

p xx


----------



## lolabelle1

Hi everyone,

I have been a regular lurker on the adoption threads and have now decided to take the plunge and post! Good luck to everyone with your matches 

A bit about us. We have been ttc for just over 3 years and have had 3 IVFs. Originally my tests were all fine but had male factor issues which was the reason for our first IVF. This was a resounding BFN and sent our world into turmoil, having assumed IVF would be the quick fix! Then after 3 unsuccessful IUIs and a low AMH result we decided to move swiftly on to donor egg as DE was not an issue for me  Got pregnant and I was blissfully confident unaware of what was about to happen- miscarriage 4 days later! So went back to NHS who persuaded me to try another OE. We got our BFP on March 19th and then found out it was ectopic 2 weeks later and had emergency surgery to remove my right tube 

So... we are going to try one more IVF and then if that is a neg we will give up. But I woke up in a panic this morning that we are going to be too old to adopt and now I want to get the ball moving with this too if possible!

We have already enquired at a couple of agencies last year about adoption and their virtual eyes do seem to light up when they find out we are a mixed race couple (I am white, DH black) but they say I may have to be the main adopter as DH is over 50. 

Any advice would be great- thank you in advance! Can anyone recommend a good agency or borough to try?
Also, Does anyone know any agencies who will allow us to start the adoption process while trying our final IVF?
In your opinion, are agencies better (ie do they work harder to find a good match) than local boroughs?

Thank you xxx


----------



## Babypigmy

Hi 

Sorry to hear about your mc & ep. 

I think it is great to hear that you are thinking of adopting a child. I am to just starting our after years of tcc and three failed ivf attempts.

After our third failed attempt I rang the adoption agencies’ and was told by all I had to wait at least 1 year before they would consider us to adopted. This was to make sure that we defiantly had grieved and no longer want to tcc and that we would be focused only on adoption.

Having saying that not all agencies’ are the same so I would speak to them about this but be prepared for them to say you have to give it a year.

Hope all goes well for you and your dh and let us know how you get on


----------



## Guest

Hi Lolabelle and Babypigmy

Lolabelle - sounds like you are happy with your decision that this is the last go at IVF.  Good luck with it.  In terms of Adoption what's next, I don't know of any agency that would let you start the process whilst still undergoing treatment.  Most want a treatment free period before commencing, although how long varies from about 6 months to 2 years - most commonly 12 months.  I'd contact your local agencies (you can contact any within a 50 miles radius) and find out their policies - some may let you go to an information evening at this stage.  

Bop


----------



## libby29

We had our last treatment that ended in mc  may last year. We contacted la early june last year and were told we needed to wait 6 months. Having said that, the next prep course was 7 months later and they put us on this as we used the time inbetween as our wait, if that makes sense. I think la take a bit longer during hs etc but are quicker in getting you matched. This is because there harder to place childrens details go onto agencies and national and they place the "easier" ones themselves. If i'm wrong ladies please correct me! I've been really happy with our la so far as they are really on the ball. We had prep in nov and dec and are at panel in 4 wks. So a year after our final treatment we are almost at approval panel. They have always said that they treat everyone as an individual case and they have no hard and fast rules. Guess they can tell during prep and hs if your committed. Hope this helps. xx


----------



## Arrows

hi everyone. Not been on in ages but life has become a little complicated.
In early feb, 2 days after being burgled, we went to our final prep course date. We had received our formal application form to fill in a couple days earlier and put things off for a couple of weeks whilst we dealt with the burglary. Then started to slowly fill out the form. A couple of weeks later (form still not finished) I developed a seriously bad back. I've had sciatica which bothered me occasionally but then developed sever spasms in my mid and upper back. It turns out these are the result of unconsciously protecting the sciatic area (lower back) I overused and ended up having issues with my upper back!. Anyhow, 7 weeks later I'm still signed off work. I'm under a physiotherapist and doctor and have just been referred to occupational health by work, with the hope that I can return to work after Easter. With appointment schedules it looks as though I'll not get back to work till after the first may bank holiday though, and that will be on reduced duties.
We still have not sent off the formal adoption application form -have filled out all but the personal statements but with so much going on I'm scared they'll turn us away from starting the homestudy until my back is sorted. Another factor is that the painkillers I've been on were very strong (now on slightly different meds) and made me very hazy -wasn't really remembering what day it was or what I'd done the day before etc. Much clearer now though!

So my question is do we just send off the form, ring and explain first and see what they say or wait till the bback issue is resolved??


----------



## panorama

Arrows - poor you    Sounds very painful, hope you get better very soon    Not sure what's best really but I think if you call and just explain it all it should be fine, make sure you're thinking clearly before starting hs tho! 

You can tell the weather has been nice, guess we've all been out enjoying the sun!  Can't believe this weather! Love it! 

Went on a trip to Ikea yesterday to get some wardrobes as we're sorting all our bedrooms out and they are delivering them today! 

Have a lovely sunday everyone!

p xx


----------



## galaxy girl

Hi all.

Thought I would update you all - have had 2 of the busiest weekends of our lives! Fostering both weekends. the 6 month old first weekend - and he's not a good sleeper and two kids this weekend - Am shattered but have enjoyed every minute.
Arrows I would give them a ring.

Panorama - I'm sure it feels great to set up the rooms!


----------



## Guest

Glad everyone is enjoying the weather - although its back to cold and wet again here today....

GG - Glad you enjoyed respite fostering...I loved it when we did it.  It is exhausting, but easier than having them full time!!  ..and for us it was a great way to meet our family and made the transition to adoption so much easier.  

Arrows - sorry you've been having such a tough time recently.  Big ((hugs)).  I'd advise either a quick note with your application or a call first - hope you can get things moving again soon.

Bop


----------



## Belliboo

Hi hope everyone ok 

just to let you all know there is a documentary on bb2 9pm tonight - called a home for maisie its says it about a couple who adopted a 7 year old girl & how they come to terms with the abuse she suffered, not sure what it will be like but will watch it anyway xx


----------



## Poochie1111

Rach - thanks, shall watch that. No doubt I will be tears!

Arrows - sorry you have been through a tough time.  If you're not sure then I would get in touch with your SW

GG - lovely news about your foster children!!

Panorama - I was also in Ikea on Saturday.  I did cast a quick look at all the nursery items (keeping a mental note) but didn't dare look properly.  

x


----------



## Guest

Thanks for the reminder Rachel, although I've jsut discovered its on at 11.35pm up here, so I guess I'll be watching it on iPlayer tomorrow.  

Bop


----------



## charlie_44

magoogle - hope you enjoyed the rest of prep course

Mrs Dibbles -   very exciting!

Duckling - glad that you're 2nd home study was better - good luck with the rest 

AAA - hope all goes ok with the op 

sweets - exciting news   hope all goes well

panorama - hope you hear soon   

Hi to everyone else, hope all is going well with you


----------



## galaxy girl

So who watched a home for Maisie? I thought it was very good. those parents were amazing. And 9 kids wow. when it finished I was in tears. I hope she continues to get funding for her therapy.


----------



## Poochie1111

Both DH and I watched it.  I agree, the parents were pretty amazing! I was in total tears at the end.  The teddy on table at the meal on the day she got adopted did it for me. Can't wait until it's me


----------



## panorama

Morning everyone!

Have taped the programme - not watched it yet. Bet I will be in tears too!

Have some news, got a call from the little boy's homefinder this morning and we're being interviewed on the 28th!!!!!!!!!  And looks like we may be the only ones being interviewed from what she said! Very excited now, it is all becoming real now, never thought we would see the day! 

Had gone out last night with friends and my head was all fuzzy this morning, good thing I had woken up by the time she called!    Was most surprised! 

Poochie - which IKEA were you in? We actually have not properly looked at kiddy stuff yet, we got some wardrobes for storage for us really. But may start looking soon   

Sweets - any more news??

Love to all!

A xxxxx


----------



## AoC

Great news, Panorama!  

I think I need to come out of lurk and confess to a whole load of anxiety about our support networks (or lack thereof).  Mum lives three hours away, DH's parents six hours away.  My best friends live in London and Reading, I live in Cumbria.  

If I try and look at things positively, I can list the local morris dancing group I belong to that are really close nit and supportive, a group of lovely ladies, Mums and Grandmums, which includes teachers, the Chair of the Governors of the local school, a tutor of SEN kids etc etc - many of those ladies I count as my friends.  I can list the friend and her daughter whom she home schools who live in-county.  The friend just round the corner who teaches part time.  I can say, quite honestly, that Mum would be willing to come up to stay as often as we needed.  I can say that we're never afraid to ask for help, that we have many friends that would provide it in a variety of ways from online hugs to supportive phone calls to turning up on the doorstep with a meal ready to cook for us.

IF tends to isolate you from families with young children, doesn't it?

Any advice welcome.  I spoke to a nice woman on a helpline who explained that agencies respect the fact that not all families live near each other any more, and they're looking for the quality of support we get from a variety of sources, including each other, and our willingness to ask for help.

I'm off work at the moment recovering from an op, so I've got far too much time to dwell on things and worry!


----------



## Poochie1111

Panorma - that's great news.  The 28th will be here before you know it!!!  I was in the Leeds Ikea on Saturday. Buying things I don't really need as usual!


----------



## Guest

Great New Poochie.

AoC - I wouldn't worry too much.  Our support network pre kids was very weak as we'd only moved up here a short time before starting the process.  However since the kids arrived it has expanded hugely - many of my closest supports now I didn't even know pre-kids.  

Bop


----------



## AoC

Thanks Bop.    I'm not worried for myself, exactly, just for how it might be perceived.  But girding my loins and preparing to go forward and trust the process!  

Hey Poochie.


----------



## panorama

Hi Anna

Just to reassure you my family is also all over - my parents live abroad, my sisters live 2 and 3 hours away, my in laws live 2 hours away and DH's siblings also live 2 hours away and abroad! So we don't have any family nearby just friends, and we only moved here 3 years ago so just really getting to know people better. I think they mostly want you to have support which can be phone support and this was never an issue for us, even though I thought it may be.

The main problem is getting the interviews done for referees but my sister and mother in law travelled to us for this and the other referees were friends that were not too far.

Poochie - I was in Southampton IKEA, so other side of the country!  We also bought a few things we didn't totally need, all part of the experience! 

Haven't done anything today with the excitement!


----------



## AoC

Lovely to be excited like that! Nothing like it.  

And thank you, Panorama, that was hugely reassuring.  I'm officially declaring that I have obsessed too much about this today, so I'm signing off and going to try and get something - OMG, I just glanced out of the window and the village peacock is displaying on the other side of the road.... he's GORGEOUS! - productive done with what's left of the day.

Thanks everyone.


----------



## pumpkin23

Hello Everyone

AoC - I know exactly what you mean with the support network thing, we have just had to do ours for our SW - there aren't that may on there and alot of them live far away. Hope it doesn't go against us.  

We have the first of our HS on Friday morning, getting nervous about what to expect.

Take care

Pumpkin23


----------



## Magoogle

Hi Guys

Sorry have been quiet, have been ill with a virus... Next prep day next week so just catching up on the reading. Watched the panorama programme the other night...cried all the way through it and then though..anyway off to a hen night on Sat night which should be fun, thank god I'm not sick anymore.

Aoc don't worry
Fab news Panorama..

Hi and good luck to everyone else xxxx


----------



## Belliboo

Panorama fantastic news hope match is the one for you

Magoogle hope your recovering from your virus, home for Maisie was good wasn't it her parents were great


Ooh kestra not long now til you sw starts home study starts getting exciting,

Hi to poochie , galaxy girl & everyone else

We've not heard anything but sw coming on 28th so not sure what happens then just hope she brings some good news as I'm finding this wait hard similar to 2ww my head just keeps thinking about adoption & thinking about what our little one will ge like all the time, just want to get out there & start shopping but bit 
difficult when u don't know age or gender oh well suppose after all waiting ive done bit longer wont hurt xxx

AoC wishing you a speedy recovery from your op


----------



## Arrows

Panorama, how thrilling for you! Fingers crossed for the 28th!

Well, I called the agency and they said send the form in anyhow and not to worry as all will come out in the medical and my back problem is not a permanent issue.

I went to the physio on Wed and have been given the all clear to go on holiday which I'm desperately looking forward to! We're going to Wales to meet up with my family on a camping holiday -though we're in a trailer not in a tent because of my back.

Going to meet a friend in a bit so have to get up and dressed, have had a very lazy morning!


----------



## charlie_44

Just a quickie!

Panorama - that's great news, may all go smoothly for you   

Pumpkin - good luck for your first home study


----------



## Belliboo

Hi everyone just to say I've changed my profile name just thought it might be wise for next steps in our adoption journey xx


----------



## lolabelle1

Hi everyone,
So sorry not to reply to your kind posts for so long I have been recovering from op and now have a cold too! Thanks loads for your advice too.

Babypigmy (cute name!) Sorry to hear about your failed IVFs too. How long have you been waiting? 
A year does seem like a long time. Time fot thinking about you though and getting back to enjoying life again 

Bop- Thanks for your reply.  I rang one agency and they said 6 months which is great! Also rang a LA and they said a bit longer. Hmmm decisions decisions...
How are your little ones? Or not so little now? How did you find the process?

Libby- Good luck for your panel in May- how exciting! Sounds like you've got a fab LA. So it this correct that the harder to place children go to the agencies? This is making me think the LA would be a better option as we would prefer easier cases as we are not experienced adopters (or parents!)

Arrows- Glad that you feel better now. Hope the trailer is okay for your back! Enjoy your hols! x

Panorama- That's so exciting about your interview on the 28th! Not long hopefully til you get your family xxx 


Galaxy Girl- You sound so busy! and very happy too! Ahhh so exciting xxx


That documentary about Maisie was so moving, the poor little girl. At least she has her family now and will continue to feel happier as she gets older. All the other kids were great too. What a nice family. 

Hi AoC! Cyber hugs to you xxxxx
It must be hard to live so far away from family and best friends. Didn't know you live in Cumbria what a gorgeous place 
Hope you feel less anxious soon. 
I don't have much knowledge  of the adoption process. but like Bop says as soon as you are matched the support network will grow. My best friend lives in the same town as me and she has sooo many new friends because she has a son and so knows everyone from nursery and school. 
Have a lovely weekend xx

Magoogle- Enjoy the Hen do! 

Belliboo- Hope that you find out about your little one soon. Am excited for you! xxx

Well, we are going to have one more IVF for sure. Think it will be in June. So will let you know how it goes.

Thank you everyone for your support xxx


----------



## Miny Moo

Iolabella1 - It's not all harder to place children with VA's, some children need moving out of area's for security reason's, other's may come from smaller  LA's that just don't have the adopter's, our son's SW was telling us on his last visit that he has a 14 month old, very straight forward little girl who he cannot find adopters for in his LA or within neighbouring LA's, so they are going to have to advertise her.


----------



## Irishlady

Struggling with the waiting    Finished prep on 30th March and submitted app form on Monday, sw said she would be in touch soon with name of sw...I want to reply to say what does soon mean!!   

At prep group we were given a date of submitting app forms by 27th April, so wondering if they will wait until they are all in before sorting out sw.  I drafted an email to LA to ask for an idea of when we will hear but have so far resisted the urge.  I have been doing reading and working on support network, so trying to use time effectively! This is so tough.... Sorry for rant  

Hope you all have lovely weekends when they come   

Maisie prog was v moving, family futures seemed brilliant as well. Also saw the Gatwick baby programme and really felt for Steven.   

xx


----------



## lolabelle1

Hi everyone! Hope you are all having a good weekend  

Mini Moo- Are you with a VA then? What made you decide between the two? You can't go with both can you. We are still going to have one more IVF but in this time I am also researching which I am finding very positive indeed. Are you adopting a second child? How have you found it? I have 4 adopted cousins who I love as much, if not more than my blood cousins so that side of things doesn't worry me. But I have to admit I am worried about the modern adoption process xxx

Irishlady- Can you think of a fun little project to take your mind off things in this waiting time? xxx


----------



## Miny Moo

Iolabelle1 - Yes we are with an VA, we are lucky that because of our location we were able to make enquires of lots of agencies both VA and LA, because we wanted older children our local LA did not want to place older children within their local area, of the agencies we contacted 3 got back to us, we attended to information events at LA's and went for an informal interview at a VA, we decided on the VA because they were who we felt more comfortable with.

From 1st contact to approval was 18 months, we were approved for 2-3 over 5's so had loads of interest, so much so that our SW had to ask the register to put a hold on sending through anymore profiles. We knew about our son a week after approval, there was something that was just right about him and he was the only single child we looked at, I just think that our SW knew us very well and how he would fit with us and us with him, it took another 6 months to get him home.

As we only ended up with 1, we will be starting the process again for no. 2, we are going with the same SW but she has now moved to an LA, so we will get the experience of both.

Good luck with your next IVF, but please don't hesitate if you have any question's.


----------



## KG81

Hi everybody
Newbie here!
We went on the prep course end of march, and last week we had a phone call from our allocated social worker saying she is coming to see us on wednesday.
Any ideas what is going to happen?
We've done all the paper work i think: applications, medical forms, CRB, all referees and employer contacted, and they all sent their forms back.
Is her first visit the start of the home assessment?
Hugs
Karen x x


----------



## skyblu

Hi ladies,

Sorry I have not been about for a while, but I have been really poorly with endo 
Still no news from my local hospital but have been told my hysterectomy will be in October in Cardiff but hoping that my local one can do it sooner.

We went for our information evening on Wednesday, I don't know if it was me, but we both found  it quite negative and a bit like an AA meeting in the beging. It did get better as time went on but I just felt like they kept on going on about the bad things instead of the good things, like giving a child a home, love, warmth, food, understanding, comfort and the joys that children can give to parents.
W start our prep course on the 24th June so hopfully that will go by quickly.

Hope all of you are all well and welcome to the new ladies.
I will try and do personals next time.
Take care
Skyblu.xx


----------



## Babypigmy

Hi Guys,

Hope everyone had a good weekend, weather has been pretty good over the last couple of days but by the weekend no doubt we'll have the traditional Easter weekend weather!

Lolabellel, sorry to hear you have now got a cold hope you get well soon   

It has been now been approx 18 months since our last IVF cycle and we are now waiting to go for our first meeting with a SW mid May. Has been a tough 18 months having to try accept that we where giving up on having a child through IVF or by some miracle naturally. But we have both got there in the end and now we are fully focused on our next journey and can't wait for everything to start moving!


----------



## Magoogle

Hi all

Skyblu hope you are feeling better soon..i know what you mean about the meetings, my husband jokingly said he was going to stand up and say he was an alhoholic lol...but I din't think it would hev gone down too well!!!!

Good luck babypigmy and KG.

Hi to everyone else xxxx


----------



## Miny Moo

Skyblu - Sorry you found the information evening a bit negative, but they do need to give you all the facts, I really hope it has not put you off, more given you something to think about, the more facts you get the better, we though we were well prepared, but the reality of parenting a traumatized and hurt child was the biggest shock to our system's ever, it is also the best thing we have ever done and we would not be without our son for the world.


----------



## lolabelle1

MIny Moo- Ahh you poor little son, but he is so lucky that found each other xxx 

Thanks for explaining your situation. Sounds very interesting. Wonder how you will find LA. It's great that you get on so well with your SW. 
Do you have to do the whole process again or are you fast tracked because you have already adopted? We live in London so there is plenty of choice of boroughs luckily (do you too?) and we are a mixed race couple and have heard this will help us too. So feel a quite guilty going for another IVF but it's something we have to do or we might regret it later on. Am seeing my counsellor tomorrow and she was looking for agency information for us so wonder if she found anything out. 

Thank you 

Irishlady- We all seem to have been waiting forever for our families don't we? Not too long now for you though- at least you know roughly when you will hear 

KG81- Exciting! Hoover out then he he  Hope it goes really well.

skyblu- Hello! Wonder why they only spoke about the negatives. Hope the prep course goes better xxx

Babpigmy- Heard on the radio that it will be a glorious Easter Sunday! Yay! So the waiting begins again but in a much more positive way 

Magoogle- So funny! That's exactly what my boyfriend would say as a joke too... uh oh!


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Sorry have been awol but house has been all over with finally getting the repairs done and had no internet connected    
Anyhow, will try and catch up.

Hi to KG81 and lolabelle, welcome to the thread 

Panorama- roll on the 28th hun   

Pumpkin- hope home study went well

Skyblu- hope your feeling better soon   

Babypigmy- is a very hard decision to make turning your back on ttc, best of luck to you 

Anj- hows you and nemo doing

Irishlady- hope s/w gets in touch soon.

Hi to everyone else    

Well, as said earlier had a manic few weeks. However, nearly all done now   
We went on a 'bringing children home course' on friday which was very good. Then had the car stolen      which was very bad.
The 2 littlies, gonna call them Yogi and BooBoo, s/w's came out to see us today. They were here for 2 hrs. Was so nervous but we chatted well and everyone was smiling. They are getting back to us by thursday as to whether they want us for Yogi and BooBoo. They did start talking about panel dates and when paperwork is to be in "incase" they go ahead with us. Am hoping its a good sign     
Don't think i'll be sleeping much till then    

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## KG81

Thank you for your welcome
Am getting stressed now for tomorrow, do we have to make sure each room of the house is very clean and tidy? Will she have a look around?
Karen x


----------



## sweets x

Karen- ours did have a look around all the house, however, don't think they will be dust inspecting ontop of wardrobes etc..
Good luck


----------



## KG81

Thanks, will make sure it's clean and tidy everywhere then!  x


----------



## panorama

Hiya!

Sweets - wow!! Glad it went well, I think it's all looking good!! How exciting! I think I wouldn't sleep much either! Hope they get back to you soon!      Sorry to hear about the car   

Karen - mine did not look around till the end of our hs, so only saw the lounge in the first visit! 

Lolabelle - best of luch with the ivf!

Skyblu - they always make it out to be much worse than it sometimes is, I think it's to see how strong you are! Hope you can get your op soon   

Hope everyone is enjoying the sun, amazing isn't it? Keep dreaming of paddling pools in the not too distant future     Just willing the next week to go by now!!  Got the CPR and we're still really keen so just hoping it's a match!

panorama xx


----------



## Poochie1111

Oh Sweets!! I have everything crossed for you for Thursday    

KG81 - sometimes they look around your house, sometimes they don't.  I've heard various things.  Ours didn't look around. Don't worry too much about the cleaning - they are not here to assess your cleaning skills, although I can't talk as obsessively cleaned for our viisit!! It was nerves more than anything. I'll be a bit more relaxed about it next time. Good luck with it.

Skyblu - hope you are feeling better. sorry to hear the info evening was a bit negative. I guess they were been ultra cautious in the information they gave out.  Ours was the same and got more positive as the night went on.  I guess it's their way of trying to stop those who it may not be right for adoption from waisting their time, as they get loads of drop offs from those evenings. As mini moo says, it's thier job to provide all the facts. I'm sure it will get better. Stick with it   

Hope you all are enjoying the mighty fine weather!   

x


----------



## thespouses

Sssshhh.... we may have a link. We are waiting on a little extra information and then we will probably be one of three or four profiles to be considered.

We should know by Friday if we have been properly linked - in the situation we are in (overseas) it is mainly paperwork after that to get to a proper match, some of which we need to sort out - but matches can fall through after being made so even if we are the one chosen nothing is certain.
Can't sleep nevertheless!


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi all,

Lots of exciting news on here lately!!!  
I'm a bit of a lurker here now, I don't post much but love to hear how you're all doing.

Sweets....Thanks for asking after me  , Nemo's doing great, full of beans and 19months going on 3 years!!  bless him. He's now been with us almost 8 months! I don't know where the time has gone!
I bet you're so excited  , 1 and 3 are such lovely ages too, Nemo moved in with us when he was almost 12 months, and he really was still a baby then. 
Now at 19 months he's a real little boy  into all sorts of mischief!  
I have everything crossed for you 

Lots of love to everyone and lots of luck,

Love Anj x


----------



## Guest

Fab news Spouse - hope you get good news at the end of the week.  

KG81 - hope all goes well today - I'm sure your house is fine.  

Bop


----------



## panorama

thespouses - great news!  Everything crossed for you, so exciting on here at the moment 

p xx


----------



## sweets x

Panorama and the spouses, got everything crossed for you. 
Hi everyone else, hope your enjoying the sunshine. 
Our s/w rang this morning, the girls s/w's liked us so we are going ahead with the match. 
Can't believe it, have been grinning like mad ever since
Take care 
Sweets x


----------



## liveinhope

Congratulations Sweets and DH - fantastic news!

xx


----------



## Duckling

Just on really quickly, have to say _CONGRATULATIONS SWEETS!!!_ xxx

Duckling x


----------



## thespouses

Oooh good news sweets!

Thanks all for your good wishes!


----------



## panorama

Sweets - YAY!!!!! You're going to be a mummy!!     

Think you need to celebrate tonight, chuffed for you both!! xx


----------



## libby29

YAY sweets!    Well done hunny!  xxxx


----------



## galaxy girl

Sweets! Brilliant news!!

Panorama and the Spouses also very excited about your potential matches!!


----------



## Guest

Fab news Sweets 

Bop


----------



## charlie_44

sweets - fantastic exciting news   

panorama - hope things go well   

lolabelle and KG81 - hi and welcome   

Irishlady - we sound like we're at the same stage, unpatiently waiting for an allocated SW for HS to begin   

thespouses - hope all goes well   

Hi to everyone else  hope you're enjoying the sunshine


----------



## liveinhope

We are waiting for our SW to ring too to organise starting home study.  I am feeling quite unsettled at the moment but once I've heard from her I think I'll feel better.  We made a lot of progress quite quickly but things seem to have slowed down now  

Im also really tired as work has been a nightmare, so am pleased that the long weekend is nearly here!


----------



## lolabelle1

sweets- congratulations! Yay! 

panorama- your paddling pools are not too far away! good luck for Thursday hope it's a match for you! xxx

thespouses- exciting! hope it's a great match for you xxx

KG81- How did it go? 

Charlie- Hello back! 

Liveinhope- Have a good relaxing weekend- you might even hear from SW tomorrow! xxx


----------



## racheypache13

Hi everyone,
I haven't been on here for a while as I was getting a little disheartened. My husband and I went to an information evening in December and are still no nearer to starting our adoption process but.....
Yesterday my mum got the all clear from the cancer she has been fighting. We are all delighted. I just wonder if we were meant to get through that before embarking on our journey? Maybe this is our time now? What do you think?
I am so pleased to hear all your lovely stories, recently sweets, congratulations.
Rache xxx


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Hi all just popping on to say a big congrats to sweets. Its such an exciting time for you. lots of shopping and decorating to be done!!!   Good luck with your potential match the spouses.

Things are moving on quite swiftly now and it doesn't seem too far away until our little one arrives. we have seen pictures now and he is absolutely gorgeous (biased of course!!!    ) We have sent pictures of us to him and a little film of our house and us of course. His little room looks so cute, I keep going in to look at it.

Anyway off to work now ( not for much longer , yay!) so all enjoy the sunshine and think of me stuck indoors. I will enjoy it tommorrow hopefully.

Love to all

Mrs Dibbles


----------



## Fergux

Big congrats to Sweets!   

& hi to everyone else...

Our SW now writing up our HS report and we go to panel end of June. We are counting down the days.

X


----------



## KG81

Our allocated sw came last night, she stayed in the lounge so didn't even see how clean and tidy the house was!  
It was very short, about 35 minutes, basically she just handed out a form for us to do an individual profile, she'll be back in 2 weeks to see me on my own first, then following week she will see hubby. 
But she's very nice so we are happy. 
Have to write 3-4 pages on myself now, will start soon as it could take time!
Any tips?!
Karen


----------



## thespouses

Still waiting to hear... we do have a little more info now so we are going to have a chat about that this evening.

(later on, um, well although apparently our profile is still being considered, we are not sure about the extra info - it could make the match not right for us...)


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

KG81 congrats on your first SW visit. Ours didn't look round on our first visit either. Grr!!!! Tips for writing about yourself, mmmm tricky... When we did ours we just scribbled ideas down together and then typed it later. You will find "homework" becomes easier as you go along. Just remember you are not being tested on your writing skills, they just want to know how you tick so they can find the best possible match for you. Good luck.   

The spouses - fingers crossed for you

Fergux Congrats regarding panel. yay!!


----------



## Poochie1111

Sweets - Yay!!     That's fabulous news!!!  As Panorama says, you're going to be a mummy!!! Yippee...

The Spouces - good luck for tomorrow.  All very exciting! Hope it's good news.

KG81 - glad your visit went well today

Rache - brilliant news about your mum.  Hopefully everything will fall into place now for you.


----------



## sweets x

hiya peeps
Thankyou for all the well wishes, means alot. Never thought we would achieve our dream, just shows dreams can come true.
Our s/w rang last night, were meeting the f/c a week on tues. 

The spouses- hope all works out for you xx

Karen- typical     at least you have a nice tidy house now, ours always looked better when s/w was coming round   

Fergux- congrats on the panel date, will wish time away for ya 

Mrs Dibbles- bless ya on keep sitting in little ones room, we keep sitting in the girls room too     Its pink, pink pink, hope they like pink as we will be rapidly redecorating  Can't wait to finish work either, think might give them 13 wks notice now    
Hope everyone is ok.

Anyone got anything nice planned for the sunny easter weekend? 
I'm working tomorrow and saturday then we are cracking open the fizzy stuff    

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## thespouses

OK, so we are probably not the preferred couple for this situation - we are the reserve, but we (especially hubby) feel that it may not be the right match for us. I'm not completely convinced as I think the problems are short term, but unless they come back and say the first choice couple declined the match, we are out of the running anyway.

I don't feel too bad about this, as we haven't been waiting that long, so I feel our child is out there for us quite soon.


----------



## Mollye

Dear everyone,

I am very new to the adoption process. My DH and I have spent 7 years trying various treatments and as of last Thursday was told that with my uterus I will almost never conceive. We had started the adoption process but was overwhelmed with the paperwork. Between us we have lived in 7 countries, in Europe, Asia and the US and obtaining the police clearances just seemed a nightmare .

We are in Ireland and there dont seem to be any agencies here - we need to do everything through the governmental agency. And we almost certainly need to do a foreign adoption. 

We are spending this weekend trawling through the paperwork, I just thought that I would say hello, if anyone had any pointer/advice that would be great.

Mollye


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Hi everyone been busy on here.

Sweets fantastic news hun and pleased the house is falling back into place at long last xx

Anj pleased nemo is doing well I love that age they are just starting to get in to everything and pushing things LOL x

Hi to all the newbies sorry can't remember everyone x

Skyblu sorry you have been feeling poorly hun, really really hope you get sorted soon x

AFM op was done on tuesday went down about 1130 and was back on the ward sitting up talking to hubby by 3 visiting, text our sw and told her it had been done and asked for next available panel date    I am feeling fab still a little bit spaced out but can't believe how well I am. Going back tomorrow for staples to be removed which I am really not looking forward to but needs must!


----------



## Poochie1111

AAA - glad everything went well and hope you make a speedy recovery

Welcome Mollye - I'm sorry I can't help with foreign adoption but wish you well with your adoption journey


----------



## Anjelissa

AAA....So glad to hear that the op went well and it's all over with   
I hope it isn't too painful tomorrow. Lots of luck that you get a panel date soon     

Love Anj x


----------



## lolabelle1

Mollye- So sorry to read your signature. Sounds like this route will in time bring you your family xxx
Have you tried En Route in Ireland? Or over here you could try the Intercountry Adoption centre which is a charity (icacentre)
I called them and they were extremely helpful.

AAA- Wow you bounced back from the surgery! Hope that you don't feel the staples too much xxx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks Ang and Lol the removal of the staples was fine hubby says there was about 30!! Basically cause they have cut the nerves its all a bit dead on my belly LOL so didn't really feel it just a bit of tugging but all bearable and still doing really well. I just want to get the ball rolling with things again as our original panel date should have been Wed feeling a little bit    that we won't be going and really want to get another date and something to work towards so fingers crossed SW rings this week and we can get our PAR and get moving!

Hope everyone has had a lovely weekend in the sunshine


----------



## ❣Audrey

Just dropping by to say AAA you're in my thoughts chick - glad hubby is taking care of you xxx


----------



## emma.b

Hi everyone. I've not posted for ages but keep checking in and wish you all well at whatever stage in the journey you are at.   

We have just completed the home study and are now waiting to read the PAR. Should be getting an e-mail from SW today to arrange a meet up to read it. He said there won't be any surprises but still feeling a little nervous about reading it. 

Panel is 11 weeks away   Wish it was sooner!

Emma.b x


----------



## charlie_44

Mollye - hi and welcome   

AAA - glad you're doing well after your op


----------



## anneken

Good evening.

I hope you don't mind me joining you all.  DH and I have decided that adoption is the way to go...We actually decided in December, but felt we needed some time after our last cycle to confirm our feelings...and yes, it feels right!

Help!

Where do we go? What do we do? How man cakes do I need to bake for the social worker?

Any advice will be gratefully recieved.

I look forward to hearing from you, and getting to know you all.

Best wishes 

Ani


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Audrey thanks hun how you doing?? Hubby is a real star couldn't do this without him.

Anneken welcome to the thread I am sure you will get loads of help from people on here. I saw a poster in the GP's just after our last failed IVF and thats how we moved forward the rest has been a happy and honestly smooth journey (well up to them postponing our panel date). Hubby has baked cakes or we have brought them and to be honest she has always had one if offered, we haven't always had things in and others on our prep group have never offered, guess its what you feel comfortable doing!


----------



## skyblu

Hi ladies

SWEETS - Congratulations hun I bet you cant wait to get them home.

AAA -  I am so glad the op went well and hope you get a new panel date asap.

AFM - I am still in a lot of pain and this last few weeks have been hell.
I had a phone call from my GP last week to say that my local hospital has declined to do the hysterectomy and reckon I would be better off sticking with my surgeon in Cardiff, so I have to wait a least 6 months 

I know I said in my last post that we found the information evening very negative but we are still going to carry on, it will take more then that to but me off, dh did go off the idea for a few days until I made him read the profile magazine which had about 60 children waiting for a mummy and a daddy. It is the first time I have seen him read anything from cover to cover and he read every profile!!!! What does that tell you.

Take care everyone
Skyblu.xx


----------



## thespouses

Welll.... we heard back on Thursday that we were second choice and the first choice couple would decide by Tuesday (yesterday). As we have not heard any more, we are pretty sure the first choice couple said yes.

We were still uncertain about a couple of things (especially hubby) so we'd have had some hard thinking to do if we were picked. But we feel positive that we are moving forward and the social workers are considering us for situations.


----------



## Miny Moo

thespouses - Your time will come, hang in there your getting nearer.


----------



## Janis18

Lurker alert**
Panorama, hoping you get a lovely call tomorrow ;-)
XXXXXXXXXX


----------



## panorama

Hi everyone!

Had our meeting today and it went really well, I think it will be a yes    Should find out for sure next week.

Unfortunately the mum has contested so the final hearing won't now be till end of June which is a bit of a bummer, but they are going to try to get all the paperwork sorted so we can go to matching panel beginning of July hopefully. We saw some more photos today and he is just gorgeous and a very happy, healthy 8 month old baby    Just have to be a bit more patient and hope the adoption order goes through but they have assured us its a dead cert that it will.

So not quite jumping up and down quite yet or about to hit the shops but we're getting closer!   

AAA - glad your op went well!

thespouses -    hope your little one finds you very soon   

Will do some more personals soon!

p xxx


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

panarama great news will be keeping everything crossed for you x

Skyblu thats really hard hun I can't imagine how awful you must be feeling. We were really lucky cause my consultant has bent over backwards to help us out he was really understanding about the adoption stuff and was really behind us. I know how hard I found it when we saw another consultant and he just didn't appreciate how awful I was feeling and how awful life was. Take care hun and you are often in my thoughts xx

Hope everyone is ok I am sore and seem to be getting sorer by the day but guess its all the bruising coming out it isn't helping cause our SW seems to have gone AWOL     All i want is to know whats gonna happen now I have an awful feeling they are going to make us wait the full 12 wks and I am 100% before they give us another panel date and kinda think that is why she is avoiding us!!


----------



## Hun

Just popping in to send my       to my friend Panorama - I am keeping EVERYTHING crossed for you sweetie xxxx


----------



## ❣Audrey

AAA - thinking of you xxx

Panorama - I hope things get sorted soon chick - so exciting for you xxx


----------



## lolabelle1

Hi Panorama,
Fingers crossed for you- sounds very exciting! xxx


----------



## Magoogle

Panorama good luck hope all goes well...

AAA thinking of you...

Skyblu the prep course def gets more postive as you go along and like you we have def decided to go for adoption, last days course on Tuesday and just want to get moving now....

Good luck and hi to everyone else xxxx


----------



## Irishlady

Panorama - good luck, hope you hear the definitive yes soon!!

I am starting to go   Finished prep 30th March and our group had to have app forms in by last week, ours were in a couple of weeks early  But still had to wait until last week and was told that we would hear about homestudy soon...I am hating these bigs gaps between each stage    Wrote a list this evening of things for dh and I to do before we have a family. So that has made things a wee bit easier!!

AAA hope you don't have to wait the full 12 weeks   

Hi to everyone else...I will get better at personals I promise   

xx


----------



## liveinhope

Yay we heard from our social worker.  She is coming round on Thursday to start Home study process - this first appointment is more about setting dates, admin etc but its a start!


----------



## AnneS

Hi there,

wanted to say a quick 'hello' to you all. I just posted a long, rambling question and hope that you can help me out with your thoughts.
We are very much at the start of the adoption journey.

Hope to get to know you all soon.

A BIG hello to Irishlady!

Anne


----------



## Poochie1111

Panorama - hope you get some good news this week

Welcome Anna!

Irishlady - I totally know what you mean about the gaps in between!

Well, SS called us today (AND on the day they promised back in January) and are coming round next week to take our CRB forms off us and officially accept our application.  It's been a long wait since we were put on hold in January as we couldn't start until 12 months after my last misscarrage, but at least now things are moving for us!! Just can't wait to get started now


----------



## panorama

Hi everyone

Just a quickie as really excited - we have been matched!!!!!!!!     

So happy and a bit tearful - we will hopefully get to meet him in July once the adoption order has been given, he will be just under 11 months old!   

Will do personals soon!

Love panorama xxxx


----------



## liveinhope

Great news!


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Yay great news Panorama!!!! really happy for you


----------



## Irishlady

Brilliant news Panorama


----------



## Fergux

Brilliant news Panorama! Really happy and excited for you

xxx


----------



## Guest

Wonderful news Panorama - hope all continues to go well.

Bop


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Panorama fab news hun so very pleased for you both roll on coming home day how amazing a 1st Birthday party awesome x

Poochie thats impressive hun all systems go x

LIH great news xx

Well the phone call came today she had about an hour until I was gonna ring her LOL. We have got to wait until I am recovered the panel manager won't approve us until they have a letter from my consultant saying I am well aaaarrrrggggghhh but at least we have an idea now and know she hasn't forgotten all about us which was what was worrying me,


----------



## galaxy girl

Panorama !! Brilliant news!


----------



## Poochie1111

Panorama - that's fabulous news.  Congratulations!!  You must be beaming!   

AAA - sorry to hear you've got you wait longer.  That's so frustrating


----------



## DaisyMaisy

Hi.

My DH and I are looking into adoption, but I am in the dark about it all.  Any advice would be fantastic.

Thanks.

xxxxxx


----------



## Janis18

I've already said this, but Panorama, I'm so happy for you. can't wait to hear when you become a Mummy again   
Hope all goes quickly and smoothly   
xxxx


----------



## watakerfuffle

Lots of exciting news on here, Congrats to all those appropriately to (hopeless on names!!). Well we decided which LA to go with, then had a meeting at our home last week with a SW. Were told we would be contacted within 2 weeks to let us know if they will take us on and when! The SW wasn't overly positive and so I am really not sure what they will come back with and say. She said it didn't look good that we are not currently doing any voluntary work with children and we would like 0-4yrs and she said those that will take older children take priority right now. If it's a no then we have the other LA to fall back on so to speak. A nervous wait....


----------



## Boggy

DaisyMaisy said:


> Hi.
> 
> My DH and I are looking into adoption, but I am in the dark about it all. Any advice would be fantastic.
> 
> Thanks.
> 
> xxxxxx


I've bumped your previous thread up for you as it's disappeared to the next page


----------



## Anjelissa

Hi all,

Lots of good things happening on here atm   

Panorama.....Congratulations!!!   That's wonderful news, and 11 months is such a lovely age, Nemo came to us just a week before his first Birthday and he was truly still a baby. 
In just 8 months he is now a real little boy, running around everywhere and a real force of nature!   
I hope it all goes smoothly and quickly for you   

AAA.....I'm so sorry to hear you have to wait   , but like you said, at least you have the answer now and have something to work towards. I hope the time passes by quickly and you are at panel before you know it! 
I will be so very happy when I see on here the words that you've been matched!! I always feel a bit teary when I hear those words as it brings back such an amazing memory, but I will be extra excited when I hear it's happened for you hun   

Hi to everyone else and Congratulations to all with great news recently   

Luv Anj x


----------



## KG81

Great news Panorama!!! 

Watarkefuffle, have you rang other LA around you?
We did phone about 7 different LA, and few of them were not nice at all on the phone so we didn't even bother going further with them. For us the initial contact was very important

Karen x x


----------



## Hun

Just popping in to add my congratulations and sheer delight    for Panorama on being matched.
You will be such a wonderful Mummy xxxxxx


----------



## Charlie5

Panorama- Great news! so pleased for youx
We were recommeneded at panel yeasterday!!! Things looking good XXX
Sarah


----------



## Guest

Great news Charlie.....hope you have a short wait until the next panel.

Bop


----------



## sweets x

Hiya peeps.

Panorama- wooo hoooo, thats fab news, congratulations, enjoy the feeling hun    

Always- sorry you have got to wait sweetie, like you say at least now you know. Time will pass hun and then you can get the ball rolling again    

Charlie5- congratulations too   

Anj- hope your all ok x x

KG81-Hope you find a LA you are comfortable with, I agree initial contact is a good ipression of what they could be like.

Watakerfuffle- hope you get news back from LA soon x

Daisymaisy- you will get lots of help on here. There was a book i got called 'what to expect when your adopting' by Ian Palmer which i found very useful, was recommended by my LA.

Poochie111- thats fab news too x x


Liveinhope- glad things are moving along nicely

Irishlady- hope you hear soon x

Hi to everyone i missed    

Well, we met with the girls f/c on tuesday just gone and they were amazing. They gave us some pic's, a little video and so much info we were really lucky.
Have got the video on my phone so not getting much work done    
We have life appreciation day in june and panel in july. 
Then meeting our girls end of july, can't wait.
We are on cloud 99    

All i can say is, when you are sat waiting to start home study, prep course, when you think it will never happen and everything seems so far away. It will happen and when it does all the heartache of surgeries, ivf, m/c's just floats away.
Getting a bit emotional now and sloppy so appologise    
Just wanted to reasure i suppose people that are still waiting. We will all get to our dreams, were just taking the scenic route to get there.

Take care 

sweets x x


----------



## Poochie1111

sweets x said:


> All i can say is, when you are sat waiting to start home study, prep course, when you think it will never happen and everything seems so far away. It will happen and when it does all the heartache of surgeries, ivf, m/c's just floats away.


Sweets that's fab to hear!! I just can't believe it will at the moment. I can't wait to be able to properly close the door on the last few years and move on with the rest of my life!! I'm so chuffed everything is going brilliantly for you. July can't come soon enough for you I bet!!

DaisyMaisy - hello. If you're just starting out then a good place to start would be is to go to an open information evening to learn more. Most adoption agencies tend to run them.


----------



## panorama

Sweets - we are also meeting our little one July time and can't wait!  Willing the months to go by!     Glad I'm not the only one feeling a bit    but happy tears! 

Thanks everyone for your lovely words    Like Sweets says you do feel so different about everything once this moment comes, still all feels very surreal   

p xx


----------



## sonia7

Hi Everyone


Hope you are all okay. Congrats to those who have been matched with their little ones and congrats to those who have recently been approved.


We are still waiting to be matched. Still early days though I know, but its hard when people ask "have you heard about your babies yet"


I had a run in today with a colleague of mine who I can presume was the spokes person for the whole team so feeling pretty low    and   


We went on an Attachment course yesterday, it was interesting but heavy going. Lots of information to take in. Didn't realize there were different types of attachment problems. The course was only the basics on attachment we would have to read or go on more courses to learn about attachment in detail.


Anyway hope everyone is okay


Speak to you soon


Sonia x


----------



## panorama

Sonia -    The waiting is so hard, hope your little one finds you soon    

Strange cos we went on an attachment course on tuesday too!    We have another 2 coming up later this month.

p xx


----------



## skyblu

Congrats Panorama and Sweets.
It is a long way off, but I can't wait to get were you are both now 

Poochie, We applied the same time in January I am so glad that you now can start the ball rolling, good luck.

AAA, I hope you are getting stronger and that dh is looking after you.
I am pleased to hear that the SW phoned you and giving you some idea on how long you have to wait for panel date.
Good luck hun and keep well 

Skyblu.x


----------



## Fergux

Hi All,

lots of lovely news on here at the moment.  
Charlie - well done on getting approved! 
Lovely news from Sweets - get you can't wait

Love to all
Fergux
x


----------



## aaa is a MUMMY

Daisy you will get loads of help on here, I had a browse round the BAAF site and also check out the book list I am sure its on FF somewhere I brought most of ours from Amazon or used the library, it does all just fall into place honest x

Waterfluke there will be plenty of time for you to start doing something with children you can do it while the homestudy stage is going on. 

Ang thank you hun you are a real star and have given me so much hope that this will all work thanks xx

Sweets you sound so happy hope to be there before Christmas fingers crossed xx

Skyblu, thanks hun in myself I am really really good I can't believe how much better I feel. My belly is tight and pulls a bit and feels weird when I touch it cause they cut the nerves so its a very odd sensation. The only problem I have really got at the moment is my bladder infection. Will soon be you in this position hun x

Thanks girls I feel better about everything now I know. SW is coming to see us on Thurs so really must try and get some colour in my face before then LOL and hopefully our PAR will arrive today or tomorrow. Have a good weekend x


----------



## panorama

AAA -   hope you get better and better and they don't keep you waiting too much longer for panel   

Skyblu - once you get going time flies, hopefully by this time next year...     

Goodness have done no work this week since our news! Must get my **** in gear!


----------



## charlie_44

Wow this has been busy since I was last on   and I'm rushing so just a few personals.

Panorama -   that's brilliant news   

Charlie5 -   to you hun

sweets - what an exciting time for you   

DaisyMaisy - hi and welcome   


A big hello to everyone else


----------



## Adam_Claire

Grrr, just need to vent a ltitle....so we are applying to become adoptive parents via Bristol. They recently had a panel meeting to decide which couples would go through to their June prep course. We did have our application in but it was quite late (since we had to wait six months following IVF) so we only really had a slim chance of getting on this course (naturally one gets way too excited, only to be let down). We never got in this time round since their medical expert has to speak to Claire's doctor about her previous condition. 
Ok fair enough...so now the next panel meeting is in september for the november prep course, so more of the old wait wait wait wait (which has been on top of numerous other waits, let downs etc etc)...
We are now terrified of not getting onto the Nov course, either by a technicality, or just simply not making the cut.  I realise this is a trivial problem in the scheme of things compares to others heartbreaks, the timescales really aren't that great, but when it follows let down after wait, after let down after wait...it does tend to grind you down a little.
I personally want to look at other options jsut to hedge our bets a little, but i dont think the LA will approve of that.
aaaaarrrrhhh.


----------



## panorama

Hi Adam - I know it is so frustrating especially when you are ready to go!!    We had to wait 9 months before starting and it did drive me a little crazy but once you get going it can all be very quick which is good! We started hs last september in tandem with prep in october and we went to panel in feb and have just been matched with our little boy! You just need to be very patient but you will get there!


----------



## Arrows

This last week has been pretty eventful.

Firstly, last weekend our youngest cat Pepsi went missing. Returned after two day -had been locked in neighbours house when they went away after being mistaken for their own cat.

Next, we've now sent off our formal application form and awaiting a social worker to be assigned to us. We also finally received a good overall report from our initial prep group, though they called me Rebekah (my name is Rachel) on the form, it was dated august 2007 and they stated we'd had a family bereavement when it was Malcolm's friend, not family.

Thirdly,  I've now been given the all clear to return to work after 2.5mths off with a bad back. I've missed a lot of my course and need to catch up, plus i got told i need to put in an application form for my own job by monday or no job after the summer.

Finally, this morning I took my cat Marmite to the vets, she's been ill since we first got her but recently been much worse and now is in frequent/constant pain and we've really struggled with her for the last 3mths. Insurance will only go so far and with behaviour issues and medical problems we can't rehome her, nor can we afford to keep her financially or practically -her condition means she's constantly peeing blood in her urine and she's stressed so spraying everywhere and weeing constantly all over the house. We've come to the decision to put her to sleep tomorrow.

I'm hurting a lot right now and finding it hard to focus on the good or what needs to be done.


----------



## Poochie1111

Arrows - I'm so sorry hun.  What a lousy week you've had.  I'm really sorry to hear about Marmite    I have a cat too and would be just devastated to have to make that hard decision.  My thoughts are with you tomorrow


----------



## KG81

Morning!

Adam, is it worth ringing other LA to found out when they run their prep course? It is what we've done to help us choose our LA. 

Arrow, so sorry about Marmite, must be awful. 

We've started the assessment few weeks ago, this week I met with our SS on my own and we talked about my individual profile. I think she was a bit surprise I was honest about everything, but now am worried it could be a problem! Had difficult childhood, divorced parents, bad upbringing from mother... Do you reckon it could slow things down or worse make a match more difficult because of it? My hubby had a very good upbringing so it does balance things out! She wanted to know if I knew my upbringing was not normal, which I knew, so she said that's fine but I have to write more about it and show I will not do what my mother did and I learnt from it.
Any thoughts?!

Karen x x


----------



## Miny Moo

Adam - Claire, you can contact any LA/VA within a 50 mile radius of your home, it is not until your official application form is in that you are tied to one agency. When we applied the VA we went with actively encouraged us to contact other agencies to get a broader picture an to see who we felt more comfortable with.


----------



## Magoogle

Hi all

Really sorry to hear about Marmite, It's a difficult decision to make...  

Well prep course completed and application form sent off, although apparently  home visits won't begin until September which is a bit of a wait, but I suppose I will just have to get used to waiting...

Mags xx


----------



## Arrows

thanks everyone. Magoogle, sounds like we're in a pretty similar place -we've had prep course and sent off application form but now waiting to hear about social worker and timing.
I prayed as a teen for more patience as people told me I had none -joke's on me!
I love this quote from Evan Almighty:

"Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"

Even if you don't believe I reckon there's something in this for everyone!


----------



## libby29

Hi all hope your all well,
So sorry to hear about your poor pussy cat, i have two and know how precious they are. x

Well me and hubby have our approval panel on monday, eek! I feel sick with nerves and am just hoping that i dont turn into a jibbering wreck when faced with questions. Oh god what if my mind goes blank?  OMG! lol


----------



## AnneS

Hi everyone,
goodness, this thread is busy, I had difficulties finding my last/first post.
As I have another discussion thread going I just wanted to say 'hi' again and let you know that I am reading here and finding it really helpful. 
My heart goes out to those of you who have had a hard time. You are in my thoughts   .
My congratulations to those of you who are a step further!!!!
Arrows - thanks for sharing that quote - it is truly thought provoking.
Dh just appeared and is pestering em to read the replies to my ICA v domestic question on the other thread. As he is blackmailign me with a glass of vino rosso, I have to say goodbye   


Take care all of you and looking forward to getting to know you all.


Anne


----------



## AoC

sweets x said:


> All i can say is, when you are sat waiting to start home study, prep course, when you think it will never happen and everything seems so far away. It will happen and when it does all the heartache of surgeries, ivf, m/c's just floats away.


Thank you Sweets - that was a really lovely thing to say, and very uplifting.  I feel quite like how Poochie feels at the mo! (Hi Poochie!  )


----------



## Mrs Dibbles

Adam Clare - We went with Bristol and like you just missed a prep course and had to wait 6 months until the next one. Its very frustrating. We had looked at other LA's but decided to stick with Bristol and yes we did get on the next course. Unfortunately adoption is a massive waiting game all the time. You could maybe ask how likely it might be for you to get onto the november course and try and push the medical aspects before the course begins so you don't get yet another hold up waiting for medicals. I had my medical prior to the course due to previous medical history. Hope this helps. Mrs D x

Hi to everyone else, only 2 more sleeps until matching panel!!!! Eek!!


----------



## Anjelissa

In case I don't get a chance in the next 2 days.....

Mrs Dibbles.....Lots of luck for matching panel   
Even though in many ways it is more important, we found it far more relaxed and less nerve wracking that approval panel. You'll be fine   . Hope you have a celebration planned   

Have a good day all,

Luv Anj x


----------



## libby29

Mrs dibbles, good luck for mp (i'm sure you won't need it though). Let us know how it goes hunny, fingers crossed for you xxxx


----------



## charlie_44

Arrows - sending you    I know how hard it would be having a kitty myself.

libby29 - was it yesterday approval panel?  If so how did it go?

Mrs Dibbles -   

Big   to everyone else.


We've just heard from our allocated SW and we starting HS in 2 weeks


----------



## charlie_44

Libby - just read you sig -


----------



## panorama

Libby - great news! See you had nothing to worry about    Did you go blank??    

Charlie - brill news, it will fly by now!

Mrs Dibbles - good luck for thurs!!   

Arrows - some more     for you.   

KG81 - I was totally honest too and my sw actually thought the fact I didn't have a perfect childhood was really helpful for when we need to consider our LO's feelings in life so it's not a bad thing!

Hello everyone else! Back from visitng my nieces and nephews and getting lots of cuddles, they are very excited about meeting their baby cousin in the summer    My little niece who is 2 was totally adorable and still so little    

Found out that our LA has moved back normal panel a week for us as it was going to be very close with the court case, which is lovely of them. So matching panel should be 11th July! 2 days before my b'day and bizarrely enough the same date we found out we were pg with our son 6 years ago. Most bizarre! Just hope we get there this time!    

Oh and one of my friends could not contain her excitement and brought round a box full of new baby gap stuff last week! Eeeeeeekkkkkkkkk! 

p xx


----------



## Charlie5

Panoroma- Brilliant news it must be such a lovely feeling !!!
July the 11th was my wedding day and it was a happy sunny and wonderful day just like yours will be !!  
Charliexx


----------



## Poochie1111

Libby - congrats on your news!  Yay!    

Panorama - that has to be a good sign. How lovely of your friend to bring round the baby stuff.  Makes it feel so real!

Charlie - yay to getting your SW allocated and great you can get going in a couple of weeks!!

AoC - hello   

I mentioned last week that SS got back in touch last week.  They came around today to 'officially accept' us.  We were told that we should be allocated a SW in a couple of weeks.  Can't wait to get going now!!  

x


----------



## libby29

Thank you for your congrats ladies, it feels amazing!  Thankfully we didn't go blank but we were incredibly nervous and it must have shown as the chair person said she could only imagine how it feels to be sat in our seats which we both thought was a nice ice breaker. They were all lovely and smiley but its still very hard as its so important to us all. It was such a relief after that i felt physically sick for the rest of the day and had to have a lie down before our bubbles to celebrate lol . So glad we went though as really felt part of the process and they said at the end they like people to attend although not essential as it shows that we are willing to do what ever it takes for our family no matter how uncomfortable it may be. It shows we are the tough/ resilient people they need. This made me fill up. I held it together untill the door closed then burst into tears with hubby and sw dabbing my eyes lol. A very moving day indead! We did it! xxxxxx


----------



## skyblu

Libby
Skyblu.x


----------



## JenBow

Hello, I'm new here! DH and I are just starting out down the adoption path and I hope you don't mind me posing a quick question!

You can see from my history we have had number of attempts over the last few years to get our family through tx, but over the last few months we have been seriously talking about moving on to adoption, and we feel ready to make this exciting step.  In a way we feel a big sense of relief that we can give ourselves permission to stop the tx - and move forward with a new, exciting plan - it feels really right.

I initially made contact with our local authority back in Jan and someone called me and we had a really brief chat, and she was going to get someone else to call me back to talk through next steps.  She mentioned we would need a break betweeen our last tx and starting the process.  No-one called me back, so I'll need to chase this again.

In the meantime, we decided to have one last tx  - a donor embryo cycle in Czech, which was a bfn just this week. We actually feel fine with this, and quite relieved -  as if we really have tried everything now and we're totally ready to start the adoption process.

My question is - since our last cycle was abroad and as far as I know there would be no record of this with our GP - would it hurt to tell a white lie and say our last cycle was in Jan, just so we can hopefully get the process started a little sooner?  We're really aware of what a long road the adoption road is, and we would love to get started as soon as possible.

On the other hand, if there is any chance that the adoption agency  / SW would want to contact the clinics where we have had treatment to gather history of treatment etc (we had our Jan cycle in Czech too) then I would be mortified if they found out I'd lied, and I don't doubt this would count against us!

I just wondered if anyone had any thoughts on this?  What sort of process do you go though in terms of talking through previous treatments etc?

Would really appreciate any advice you can offer.

Many thanks

jenbow x


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## KG81

Hi Jenbow
I was wondering about the same thing last year, but I had blood tests done through gp and hospital so that would have come up at some point. We had cycles abroad too and they are not looking into it or getting in touch with clinic so no worries about that I think. 
I would make sure there is no track of anything at gp or hospital otherwise I wouldn't risk it at all. 
Karen x x


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## Boggy

Hi JenBow, welcome to the Adoption/fostering boards.    Sorry to read about your BFN. 

Almost all LA ask people to wait at least 6 months after treatment before beginning the adoption process, some places ask for longer.  I went straight from intial test results to adoption and from my experence I now realise just how important this break is.  

My advice would be to always be completely honest with the Social Workers.  If they found out you told a lie then it could be the end of your adoption journey - so much of the process is built on trust.  I doubt they'd contact clinic, but you never know how things might turn out. 

The break really is important, adoption is very draining and you need to be in the best place possible to get through it.  

Perhaps not the response you wanted to read, but honesty really is the best policy with SW!

Bx


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## Mrs Dibbles

Yes yes yes yes We got a 100% yes today at matching panel. I'm so excited words can't express it. Benn out for a lovely lunch and going to celebrate with some bubbles tonight! Yippee! I'm finally going to be a mummy!!!!!!


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## Guest

Fantastic news Mrs Dibbles - enjoy your bubbles and the rest of your life as a Mum.

Bop


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## panorama

Mrs Dibbles - brilliant news!! When do you meet your little man? How exciting!!!! Enjoy the bubbly!

Jenbow - hmm tricky one, find out what your LA waiting period is first, we had to wait 9 months anyway so as long as you feel strong enough to get going by the time the waiting period is over it won't hurt to go to information evenings etc. We had already waited over a year from our last tx by the time we got going so we were itching to go! But as Boggy says you do need some time at least 6 months to be able to deal with the adoption process. But for a few months I would not worry too much!

Poochie - great news!!

AFM another twist in the tale    Parents now decided not to contest so we may be able to get an earlier court date! May be hard to do but I guess if they can't, then at least we know it will be easier   .

p xxxx


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## JenBow

Thanks ladies for your welcome. And congrats mrs dibbbles! 

I think we will go for honesty as the best policy! Chatted it over with dh and he is pleased as he hates breaking rules - too stressful!

Looking forward to getting to know you all! I'm currently en route to a wedding in Ireland so hoping for a good boogie tomorrow!
Love
Jenbow


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## Fergux

Mrs Dibbles - that's great news, many congrats

x


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## Poochie1111

Mrs Dibbles - Yay! that's brilliant news!!!!  Enjoy your well deserved bubbles!!    

Jan Bow - welcome.  I agree, honesty is definitely the best policy.  

Panorama - brill news about the parents!!  Hope you can get an earlier date


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## willswendy

Congratulations Mrs Dibbles, after out panel on Monday, I had to come on and see your outcome ( I just knew you would be fine though).

Soooo pleased for you, its such a fantastic feeling!!

Have a great night celebrating xxx


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## liveinhope

Great news Mrs Dibbles!

So much great news on here, gives us all inspiration!
xx


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Wow so much good news on here again always gives me such a lift. I am sorry cause i am totally brain dead this morning and can't remeber who had what news but I am really really happy for you all. 

JenBow Welcome to the thread you will get loads of help and support on here everyone is lovely and it also helps with the WAITS reading the fab news on here. I am pleased you decided honesty was the best policy.You will be asked SOOOOOOOO many questions about everything on sooooooooooooo many occasions it would be awful to say something and have the rug pulled from under you! We had a 6 mth wait between our last treatment and starting and too be honest we had a holiday and lots of family stuff going on and now when I look back those 6 months were really just fun easy times cause we weren't trying for a family we weren't going backwards and forwards for tests and more tests and we could just be us and enjoy each other!

Have a lovely weekend everyone. Just wondering if I can pick a brain cause mine is useless post op we got a draft of our par last weekend and I haven't got a clue what to write in our comments bit any ideas would be gratefully received!!


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## Irishlady

Such great and happy news on here which is great...makes it seem so much more real.

Well finally I got a call this morning from our appointed sw. So we are meeting her on 26th May to start homestudy. It will almost be 2 months since we finished prep group and I do wonder why there is such a gap, but maybe it is to see if you are still keen to continue the adoption path. I can't think of anything else at the moment    which is only going to get worse as time goes on.

Hope you all have lovely weekends   

x


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Irish lady fab news hun, I totally understand what you mean about not being able to think of anything else. I think I have managed to drive myself officially nuts over the last few weeks blaming it on the recovery from my op and having far to much time on my hands doing nothing. Once you start home study you really do feel like you are making a massive step in the right direction.


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## Irishlady

Thanks AAA!! Hope you are doing ok xx


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Thanks  I am fine we have been a bit crazy over the weekend and brought bits ready for Bubba's bedroom so exciting and can't believe at long last I feel I can step foot in those shops!


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## AoC

Can I ask for some quick advice?

After months of uncertainty, I've been told my job is secure-ish.  At the same time, DH was told his is at risk, and he's likely to be made redundant.  We're currently filling in the lengthy 'expression of interest' forms for our LA. 

Is there any point carrying on in the current circumstances, or will they just reject us out of hand until our situation is more secure?

I'm going to ask the LA direct for advice, but I'd welcome other people's thoughts, too.

Thanks, Anna


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## Guest

Hi everyone

AoC - I doubt it would stop you proceeding, although that does depend on your individual financial circumstances.  If losing his income seriously affects your financial stability, then it might be an issue.  At the end of the day no-one know how long it will take him to find a new job and in the worst case, there is no reason if your job is secure that he can't be the one to be at home with the child/ren at least at first.  

Sorry no personals - just a quick check in as I'm busy packing boxes as we move in 8 days!

Bop


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## AoC

Good luck with the move, Bop!  Thanks for the reply.  We can manage without his income in the short term, with the help of mortgage protection and JSA etc.  Med to long term we can't.  I'll wait to see what the LA say.


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## sweets x

Hiya peeps

Don't know where time is going, doesn't seem that long since i posted    

Mrs Dibbles- woo hoo, congratulations sweetie to you both x x 

Jenbow- welcome and good luck for your journey

Always- hope your ok and feeling better x x

Bop- hope the move goes smoothly

Anna- hope your LA has helped with your questions

Irishlady- congrats to starting home study, what a wonderful date, thats our wedding anniversary    

Panorama- thats great news, hope you get a date soon x

Poochie, Skyblu, Libby, Bop, Boggy, KG81, Charlie5, Charlie 44 and anyone i have missed, hope your all ok.

We are finally getting the house sorted (fingers crossed) after 5 months. The girls rooms will be decorated and carpeted by the end of next week    Have ordered some bedroom furniture too which should come on monday. All very exciting.
S/w coming out then too to go over car details and look at our DVD of the girls    
Patiently wishing time away to end of july.
Take care

sweets x x


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## AnneS

Hi everyone,

just a quick 'Hello'. I am still reading here, but as we are just back from a week in Spain (holidays, not all sunny   ), I won't do personals, sorry.

Still contemplating our two adoption choices, but starting to lean more towards domestic, maybe, possibly, perhaps   . 

Good to read so much good news here.

A special big   to Irishlady. All the best for the HS, hope it does not make you too nervous. Take care!

Anne


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## Mrs Dibbles

Hi all, 

I see we have all been a bit quiet on this thread of late. Just popping on to announce that it is my last day at work today!!!! 

Whoop whoop!!!!            


I made some cakes to take in and have now realised that I will not be the type of mummy who bakes!! Ha ha! Still the thought was there.

Start intros with Pickle on the 13th of June. We saw his foster carers this week who were brilliant and gave us a real insight into his life/personality/routine at the mo. all good, which makes me want to meet him all the more. Going to spend the next 2 weeks blitzing the house and making it as toddler proof as possible.

Hope all are well

Mrs D


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## sweets x

Mrs Dibbles-  woo hoo on last day at work. Bet you are sooo excited now x x

Hope everyone is ok, been quiet lately x x


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## liveinhope

Enjoy your last day at work Mrs Dibbles! 

We are well into the swing of our home study now, been challenging at times but we are certainly learning a lot about ourselves.

I have the rest of the day off, am out at a concert later with my lovely sister.  Shame I have to go back to work tomorrow.

xx


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Mrs Dibbles fab news must be so exciting x

nothing much going on hear so don't have anything to report, Bubba's now has a lovely bedroom and cotbed just need to be approved and get things moving. We kinda decided a couple of weeks ago we were fed up and needed to do something productive to getting bedroom ready was the way to go looks fab so pleased with it. I can't believe I go back to work next week where oh where have the last 5 weeks gone I bet the next few months won't fly by as quickly. 

Hope everyone is ok x


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## galaxy girl

Mrs Dibbles - fab news.. so exciting to finish work.

AAA - yeah to getting room sorted.

We are being kept busy with respite fostering weekends. this weekend a 8 month baby and a 2 year old girl are coming. very exciting. We have the house baby proofed ( i hope) poor dog is very confused about the stair gates - DH and I were chuffed when they went up  - without too many hassles!


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## Duckling

Just wanted to say 'hi' to everyone as haven't posted for a while. 
Galaxy Girl - it sounds great!
Charlie 44 - really pleased hs starting soon. I haven't felt that awful fed up with waiting feeling since starting hs. Sw has been coming once a fortnight and leaving homework inbetween, so feel as if we're doing something.
However ... must confess, just like you AAA, we've been getting the bedroom a little bit readier (just to make us feel that this might really happen).
Panorama - it sounds so exciting.
Libby - I thought the comments the panel made were really lovely. Congratulations!
Hi Jenbow and welcome.
Mrs Dibbles - Wow! Was imagining that could be me. Your news is so exciting.
Irish Lady - the waiting for a baby thing is so hard. DH and I realised we kept putting things on hold all through the IVFs and still now really. Trying though to remember to have fun. Hope you manage too.
Bop - hope move not too stressful.
Hiya Sweets.
Skyblu - hope you're feeling a bit better.
I wanted to say too how lovely and supportive everyone is. I don't post massively but get so much help from other people's questions and answers. Sometimes have a self-pitying wobble and then see all of you going through the same thing and getting on with it - so thanks.
Hi to everyone I haven't mentioned. Have a lovely weekend.
Duckling x


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## aaa is a MUMMY

Duckling, its helped us both start to think it might happen again getting bubbas room ready. I can't believe its almost 3 months since we finished hs and we haven't been approved yet    Fingers crossed for the next few months and hopefully all our little ones will be snuggled up in their rooms with their mummy's and daddy's soon.

Hope everyone has a lovely weeekend xx


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## Boggy

Hi Ladies

Just to make you aware, as this thread is now over 50 pages I'll be locking it over the next couple of days and starting a new one for you.

I'll post the link when it's done.  

Bx


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## charlie_44

Hi all   

Poochie - hope you have your SW soon - if not already 

Mrs Dibbles -   

Irishlady - hope you're first meeting with your SW went well 

sweets - exciting times for you   

panorama - hope you get that earlier court date

duckling - hope your hs is going well - it definatley feels more like it's happening once it starts!

Hi to Jenbow, fergux, livinhope, AAA, Bop, Boggy, Anne S, GG and anyone else I've missed   


We've just started HS, so it really feels like things are under way now   though trying not to get to excited as there's still a long way to go!  Our SW is lovely so that's a bonus


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## Poochie1111

Charlie - great news you've got started.    Hopefully the next few months will whizz by now

AAA - sounds like you're trying to being positive an keep yourself busy.  Hope the next few months go quickly

Mrs Dibbles - that's brilliant news. How fab to finish work. June 13th will soon be here.  Just a couple of weeks to go   

Sweets - how exciting.  Just think it's June next week then you can say, 'they're coming home next month'.  Glad it's all going well

Bop - good luck with the house move

AoC - I would carry on regardless.  My dept is about to go through a restructure in a few months and we've been told there will be job loses.  I've told SS about it and they seemed okay.  I guess no-one's situation is ever perfect and they account for that

Not too much to update on me. We had a letter through this week to say we wouldn't be allocated a SW until the CRBs were completed (not quite what they said on the last visit - they said they could both run in parallel). It looks like our checks may take a while as I've lived in three different boroughs in the last 10 years so they'll have to contact all three. More waiting...


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## Boggy

New home this way.......

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=264187.new#new


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