# Depressed on 43rd Birthday



## Be Lucky (Mar 22, 2008)

Dear Ladies 

I am 43 today and earlier felt very depressed as you can see from my profile I have had 3 bfns in the last year.

Considering going to Reprofit to try maybe 1 go with my own then donor eggs.

My amh is very low for my age is o.5 (low for my age I believe) and fsh varies from 3 to 21!

But I was very fertile 3 years ago as conceived on 25mg of clomid but had mc so levels must have dipped.

Is there anyone who has conceived with these levels and been honest is it worth trying again with my own gametes or am I wasting time and money.

Thanks in advance for any responses

Berniex


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## Kizzy161 (Jun 6, 2007)

Hey there,  couldn't read and run even though we've chatted in other places.  So sorry you were down on your birthday,  I can't offfer any words of wisdom but I'm thinking of you.

Karen xx


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## matti (Aug 10, 2007)

Hi Bernie

Read your message and know exactly how you are feeling. I turned 43 in June and it sucks, where did all the time go. 
I got an AMH result of 0.4 in Nov 07 & was told not to even bother with my own eggs,DE was definitely the only option (unknown to me I was pregnant at the time).  I conceived naturally in Oct 07, but mc at 8 weeks. We have spent this whole year ttc naturally, no luck. 
I am planning to try with my own eggs just the once IVF or IUI(completely against my clinic's advice who tell me I must have money to waste - definitely not the case ) but completely for my own peace of mind.  If it doesn't work then I will move onto DE option (which I am coming around to).
Please don't give up. I've heard of 2 cases of women with lower AMH levels coneiving naturally and giving birth to healthy babies after previously mc. What about all these women who give birth in their 40s who haven't even heard of AMH, FSH etc. I wonder what their levels are, who knows.  I sometimes wish I'd never had that damn AMH test as sometimes "no knowledge" can be a good thing and can cause less stress.
I wish you loads of good wishes.
Matti x


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## Be Lucky (Mar 22, 2008)

Dear matti thanx 4 ur understandin response.just had a nice italian meal with dh and waiter gave me kisses on both cheeks caus of my birthday yest!what clinic u at?berniex


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## matti (Aug 10, 2007)

Hi Bernie - Italian kisses sound nice!!! I'm at GCRM - Glasgow Centre for Reproductive Medicine. 
I've thought about travelling to clinic in Europe but my husband isn't keen and if we opt for donor egg we'd like to have details of the donor - just personal choice really.  
We put our names on list for DE in Nov 07 when I got my AMH results.We were told waiting time approx 12/18 months or so - that prob means I'll be 44 by time they tx (eeek!). We're just wishing like mad that I conceive naturally again - however if nothing has happened by Sept/Oct time this year we're making an appt to discuss options with my own eggs (if there are any!) before deciding DE.  
Incidentally, my FSH levels were at 33 the month before I conceived naturally last year. Much higher than yours.  All these numbers etc just confuse me and I think we are all loaded with too much statistics and negative info. 
Please let me know what you decide and how you get on. Much luck.
Matti x


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## ElsBelle (Feb 8, 2007)

Hi there, thought I'd butt in, if you don't mind. I'll be 43 in two weeks time - EEK ! Yes, where has the time gone?? Unfortunately, my head hasn't quite caught up with my body and still thinks I'm in my 30s.  

We were advised by our clinic that trying with my own eggs would be pretty useless, but just like you, Matti, I need to do it for my own peace of mind and to move on to DE knowing that at least I've tried.

So here I am waiting for AF to start so I can start tx. They will do the short protocol whih I'm happy about because it means I don't have to down reg and the whole thing is over in about four weeks. Am scared and excited and quite mixed up about it but am trying to stay as positive as poss. Mind you, I could be pg in 6 weeks time - EEK   again!

Let's hope I won't be too depressed on my birthday. Hopefully, you got over it by now as well?
Good luck to all of us!

xEls.


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## matti (Aug 10, 2007)

Hi Els - I wish you loads and loads of luck. Sounds like you are in the right frame of mind and being positive though!  
I cannot believe I'm 43. My teenage years seem like yesterday - I can still go back there so easily -  Ah well, I keep telling myself that age is just a number!!
I can remember when we 1st started ttc (I was 36) and I was adamant that 40 (which seemed ages away) was my cut off point.  So so scarey!!!  I am starting to panic now but also trying to remain calm.  We're going to see our clinic end of next month to see if they will let me have a go with my own eggs. They don't seem too impressed with this decision and I've been told I'm wasting my time but it's my peace of mind.  I think there still so much they don't know and a lot of research needs to be done.  I reckon in 10 years time it'll be easier for girls (note, I didn't say "women) in our dilemmas.
So exciting, you could be pregnant in 6 weeks.  Please let me know how it all goes and do keep in touch!!!
Matti x


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## Sam1934 (Aug 4, 2008)

Hi Bernie

Try not to worry too much.  There are lots of us in the same boat.  I will be 42 soon and like you have been told my FSH levels are high and my AMH is low so not to get my hopes up.  This will be our first attempt at ICSI as DP also has fertility issues. We've had about 2 years of ops and testing as I had a cyst which had to be removed and they also found fibroids which they say will not interfere with fertility.
It's been extremely frustrating to get to even the starting point and then to be told there is only a very small chance of success.

Not sure yet how many attempts to have as not sure how we will feel if it's not successful.  A friend of mine had no chance of having a baby and went for DE.  She now has a beautiful boy so will keep this as an option if all else fails.

Sam1934


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## alexfrance (Sep 28, 2008)

Hi everyone,
I saw your discussion re: amh and I too have a low AMH and was told its a sign that they can't stimulate the follicles (regardless of FSH)! I am not very knowledgable on infertility and IVF because I have only tried one stim cycle (I live in France and they don't offer IVF  to over 42 y-olds). I am 45 and have been trying to conceive naturally for 18 months.

Is there any chinese medicine or alternative method to improve chances while trying to conceive naturally?

Thanks for any suggestions or comments!

alexfrance


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