# and my crime against humanity was i am overweight



## babybiggles (May 1, 2006)

hello lovelie ladies please forgive the negativity of this email but i have been crying all day since my hospital appointment with the fertility clinic, i have been seeing them for 2.5 years now since my mc and to be honest i have been treated like i am some kind of nobody, they manage evey time on cue to reduce me to tears , to make me feel so uterly hopeless , more then i alreadly do. i know how lucky i am that i was allowed a child even though he died, I do count my blessings with him every day with the small memories i have, i know like the hospital said well at least you have had one be greatful , i am, i truely truely am.
But my crime IS WAS through depression eating unhealthily and putting on three stone in my pregnancy and never loosing it,(for this i am truely sorry) i dont want to be over weight i really dont i go to the gym four times a week and i do try and healthily, i was on metaformin and i had 6 months of clomid at 50 mg that didnt work, i have had my hsg which is clear, but this is now my 4th time of being told to go away and loose half a stone before they will allow me to have clomid again three months each time, apparently i am clinically obese and all my fertility problems stem from that , if i had a cold it would be cause i am over weight, yes i am 13 stone at 5ft 5 , size 16/18 which i know is very bad but i truely cant loose any weight i have been to a dietician an appointment i waited for since october last year cause they lost it twice and when i got in there i kid you not she told me to keep a food diary and come back in three months, no help with what i needed to do, i am know back at weight watchers but please do tell me a friend of mine who was given clomid for 12 months solid who is at least 2/3 stone hevier then me was allowed it and i am being told until i looe half a stone i am not allowed it, its so unfare, i asked for a scan to look at my pcos as i have been really suffering recntly since i stopped taking metaformin due to the severe diareah i was getting and since then i am pain all month i was told no, i am hitting 30 in January after really really pushing and almost raising my voice i am allowed an lh test and a fsh test as she did say maybe you could be going through the menopause early and a day 21 blood test again her words of comfort for me were oh well if its bad you can maybe attempt egg donation but she then said to me it will be at least another 9 months before i am allowed on the ivf waiting list if the clomid dont work, so its taken nearly 3 years to get onto the witing list i am disgusted at the treatment from start to finish that we have recieved i bet if i could even offord to go private they wouldnt query my weight,  and would scan me once or twice  and just try and give me a bit of reasurance, oh and then to top it off cause of the funding to my hospital they might not agree to help me have ivf cause i have had one child apparently it has to go through a commitee to be decided i am thinking if this goes on much more longer going to my local newspaper anomously its awful ,even the consultant has said we havent been dealt with in the right way we should of had this and that done by now.

i am now wearing a rather expensive(well for me any way cost £40) necklace with an orange stone in which begins with c cant remeber the name of it stone which promotes fertility) i will do any thing to help myself and the women who runs the shop ooffered me a progestrone cream which she said  is supposed to help she said she was a qualified  herbalist and she said this is from america and is supposed to really help,at £15 pound a jar which she said is safe to use with any medication. does that sound right



sorry mad mail lisa xxxxxxxxxx


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## maj79 (Jun 4, 2007)

HI Lisa

I just wanted to give you a big  . I too am overweight and have been to the deiticians but still struggling, yet I was lucky enought to be given Clomid. It seems to depend on who/ where you are seen. Is there no way you can go to a different clinic or would you feel like you were starting at the begining again?? I am sorry I cant be much help just wanted to give you some support. Good luck   

Emma xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

A lot of us ladies with PCOS are overweight hun you are not alone..I keep expecting them to come out with just that ..but luckily so far my doctor has just said I have done well to lose any weight with pcos .. it makes me so mad that if we smoked and got lung cancer we would be treated no problem..if we were a drug addict ..again we would be treated  but because it relates to infertility it is given such low priority money wise ..yet it causes so much misery and it is caused by a medical condition so why should we not be treated like human beings.. 

And to say that you should be grateful you have had one child and that child died ..that is just disgraceful .. 

I think we need to campaign for more awareness .. I asked a friend to sign a petition about pcos/fertility treatment and she said there were hardly any people that had signed it .. yet for heart disease or anything else they get loads yet pcos is affecting more and more women.. and in return more and more men who partner the women who can't have children..which is life changing and devastating..

You have my sympathy hun .. and we are here to support you wherever we can..I would be careful about trying any over the counter remedies including progestrone as that may mess up your cycle.. 
Cat x


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## Davis (Jul 16, 2003)

Lisa

So sorry to hear that you are being treated this way, like the others have said it is just so unfair. Are you able to get more metformin? If the clinic wont help have you tried your GP? Also your GP should be able to prescribe a diet pill such a Reductil or Xenical to help. Maybe you could ask?

I have had 2 m/c's which although are nothing compared to the pain that you have obviously been through, was very difficult for me to cope with emotionally. I was given a pamphlet by my the hospital which included their counseling service telephone number. I contacted them and was then given free fertiling and miscarriage counselling which although very difficult has helped so much. I also put on alot of weight - part comfort eating / part punishing my body and togther with ww and counselling have been able to reduce my weight slowly. I am not sure if this service is available at all hospitals but it might be worth looking online to find out. Certainly your GP can also help out here.

I have looked into progesterone creams online and as far as I can tell others say they are a waste of money so I havent tried them.

Can you move clinics at all? Even if you have a short drive? I know not everyone can but it sounds to me like they are not supporting or helping you at all.

Good luck and come and chat on the Clomid Girls thread, it really does help to share your story with others who are in the same place and who understand what its like.
Ba
x


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## linlou17 (Jul 3, 2007)

lisa i send you all my love and a big cuddle   

i feel so angry for you and cannot believe that you have been treated that way i would contact my GP or somebody. i work in the NHS and there is a scheme called PALS which you can contact if you are not happy with your treatment or the services provided they may be of some help to you.

i understand your frustrations at not seeming to get anywhere with your treatment we have been going to fertility clinic for 18 months and at the last visit when i thought we were finally going to be offered some treatment we were told to eat more nuts and broccoli!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was so angry and upset i cried and cried and cried and just felt that the whole thing was a waste of time but we have got to hang in their and hopefully it will all be worth it in the end but hey what a long and bumpy road it is!!

take care chuck and all the best xx


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## coconutkym (Dec 9, 2006)

i was refused steroids for my privately funded ivf with DE, becos of my weight. thanks for nuthin!!  went to another consultant, he didint have such a problem.

i have pcos too and its linked to insulin/blood sugar problems, hence we are all porky( i am size22) it does make it dificult to lose weight on normal calori restricted diet.. but atkins style diet with no sugar or starch does work with the insulin problem.


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## max_8579 (Jan 8, 2007)

Its just awful the way you get treated,they put my problems down to weight too and its so unfair as last time i conceived with clomid i was only a little lighter than i am now  Also i see women double the size of me who have babies.Lifes so unfair.xxx I am 5 5 and just under 16st.I had to be 15st 6 to get the clomid but ive put it back on since.

Good luck to you hun.xxx


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## darkheaven (Oct 16, 2007)

i think i will be slated for saying this but here goes im 30 5 foot 7 and 17 and a half stone im losing weight slowly but my fertility clinic is brill not once was i moan at for my weight and at my first opt i was given clomid my gyn is excellent if i was you i would kick up such a fuss for what there doing to u and how dare they make u feel that way its terrible


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## aspiring (Jun 27, 2007)

I was told to lose weight too and I'm not even overweight!!
(fortunately that was a junior doctor and when I kicked up a fuss the gynae consultant said that was silly and gave me the drugs). It seems to me they are obsessed with pcos ladies losing weight, and yet it seems half the time these ladies are overweight BECAUSE of the pcos!!

I found metformin suppressed my appetite somewhat - can you ask for more of that? It may help whilst you are on any other kind of regime.

Big hugs - I haven't been in your position but I can imagine how distressing it must be.


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

HI lisa

Firstly a big  

I am 5'6 and was 17 stone. Cons never mentioned my weight to me when i saw him. altho i did know i had to do something about it so inbetween appts off 4 months i managed to loose 2 stone. He prescribed clomid no questions asked, the only time he did mention my weight was if clomid didnt work then i would need to for ivf as my bmi would need to be under 30.

I would definately seek a second opinion. Maybe see if you can try the met again but on a lower dose?

We all know some cons need   and some are willing to help. 

Nikki


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## ccoombes (Jul 15, 2007)

i have to agree with Dakota, i am over weight (15st and 5ft 3) and was told at my appt that they would give me clomid but if i later needed ivf i would have to get my BMI to under 30.  i can only repeat what the other ladies have said and ask for a second opinion, easier said than done i know.  i do wonder tho if this is to fit in with the NHS directives rather than health.
I have recently started Cambridge diet (quite extreeme) but have had to stop as i got some very undesirable symptoms   whilst taking my first month of clomid, no one is sure if it is the drugs or the diet, so i have resigned myself to trying to eat healthy (hard when you are stressed about ttc)!


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## Mrs Dibbles (Aug 19, 2007)

Some of these doctors are so mean aren't they. I am also overweight at approx 13 and a half stone and 5 foot 5. Unfortunately I also have rheumatoid arthritis so I find exercising quite difficult. My fertility consultant was really good and understanding and put me on clomid. However, she also said that if we do eventually go down the IVF route my BMI will need to be 30 or less which is a standard requirement. I do think this is unfair really and wonder if it is a way of rigging their success rate statistics.Cynical maybe! However not all doctors have been so understanding. I had a surgeon who recently told me I was fat. Yes he didn't just tell me I was overweight he said I was fat outright. What a git!! Naturally I was very upset and didn't quite know what to say at the time. 
All I would like to say to you lovely sexy curvy ladies is hang in there I'm sure we will all be OK in the end


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## coconutkym (Dec 9, 2006)

i am also overweigt size 22

but its becos i have underactive thyroid and that also does not help conception cos i have anti thyorid antibodeies which kill off embie cells too. so its  a it of a circular argument isnt it? 

anyone got any of these mean consultants to prescrtibe xenical or weight loss surgery rather than just carping on abpit it?  no thought not


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## kellixxx (May 30, 2007)

I just want to send you BIG BIG  



kel


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