# what is lap & drill?



## kelway (Dec 9, 2006)

hi ladies, what is lap and drill? is it drilling into the egg that has a too hard outershell, or something like that? so fed up picking up my dd3 (nearly 4) from nursery and thought i would be used to it by now but i am not, far from it - as ALL other mothers alot younger and have babies in tow as well, either that or a large bump up front if you get my drift. it hurts me so much, i feel so old and washed up and darn envious of them. i like being my age (nearly 42), not bothered about it, that was until i had trouble conceiving again due to age difficulties that i have been made aware of being alot older than i feel. even my fs same age conceiving No. 2 alot easier than me. people around me make me feel guilty for being down about not having another one easily as i have a dd already, I KNOW THAT, I COULDN'T LOVE HER MORE IF I TRIED i tell them as if my wanting another one is an indication of my lacking of love for my dd, i just want another that is all, it definately seems the ONLY people that truly understand the pain are women who have experienced secondary infertility. jox


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## lauraj78 (Mar 28, 2006)

Hi jox if it's the same as i had done they drill your overies to your eggs to come out. why are they doing it do you have pcos or something.

I feel the same as you my son is the most important person in my life my dh loves him like his own.  At the moment everyone in the playground seems to be pg and it winds me up.  

if you ever want to talk pm me, your not alone chick

Laura


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## kelway (Dec 9, 2006)

cheers laura. my friends some has aspergers sydrome too! so does her husband. tough isn't it when collecting them from school - they seem to have (when watching them, all with their bumps and buggies) no idea how hard it is. sometimes you can tell when they see you with one they are feeling either pity for your or thinking you are selfish denying your child a sibling - if only they knew. all the best. joxx


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## lauraj78 (Mar 28, 2006)

hiya Kelway
it is very tough taking him and picking him up from school especially when he's screaming and flapping his arms lucky for me the parents of the kids in his class know what he's like and think he's great.  I had a bad week last week when everyone and their dog were getting pg but i'm going to stay positive and hope for the best.  me and dh have decided not to talk about tx til after christmas and have booked to go to an open day at qmc fertility clinic and get some more information on ivf.  I know we'll struggle to get the money together but it'll be worth it 

take care of yourself

laura


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## kelway (Dec 9, 2006)

hi again laura, all this pressure - dh and i need to 'do it' tonight but i am so tired, dh thinks we should take longer (i won't go into detail why although his reason makes sense) although, i am so tired and fed up with it, i would rather a quickie and get it over with (whoever said romance is alive and well! actually, we are very happy and have a great marriage, i am just very dis insterested but there you go). my friend who had ivf the other week found out on sunday that she isn't, i really thought she would be, she was trying for No. 2, anyway, what a waste of money but that is the chance with ivf. she said they paid the extra £800 too for the icsi and it still didn't work, she has some frozen embrios so may try again as for me, off to ante natal for scan tomorrow, dreading it really as i am a bit of a hypacondriac and always expect the worse case scenario, all part of my 'glass is half empty' charm, still, keeps me busy. better go as dh is waiting for meZZZzzzzz, i feel so rotten, although you have to laugh, i am treating him like a machine although for some odd reason he knows but doesn't mind unlike some of my friends who partners get upset with the feeling that they are being used, so i am grateful for his laid backness. all the best again, joxx


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