# panel cancelled!!!!!



## Mamaji (Jan 21, 2011)

Hiya

Sorry rant alert!!!!!!!!!! We were all set to go to panel next monday 30th to become permanent foster carers for siblings.  I have been gearing myself up for the last month... we had a giggle and made a bucket list of all the things we wanted to do before the commitment of having children started.... it was great fun I had a girly weekend in a hotel, massages, lovely food, I went on a spending spree for clothes, I got my room decorated just how I have always wanted it and finally we went on holiday to Tenerife for our last holiday together (a second honeymoon) which was looovely!!!  We were expecting to come home to the completed Form F for us to read and approve .... but it didnt arrive.  Got a phone call from our SW today saying that she has been attempting to obtain a reference from DHs previous workplace for the last month and at last contact she informed them she needed the reference by yesterday.  They have ignored all her attempts to contact and now because they have not responded panel has been cancelled as Form F is incomplete    .

DH was there for 15 years so SW says the reference is essential evidence as it was a job in Care Sector.  Why they are not responding is beyond me!!!!!!!!

So pxxxxd off!!!!!!!  Panel put back to June now.

Trying to console ourselves with what SW said, she said that they dont currently have any siblings on their system at the moment,so maybe the delay is meant to be.  I have had sleepless nights the last few nights as the build up to next week was coming.... maybe I will sleep better tonight.  Going to have a long soak in the bath with a glass of wine and try to see all the positives


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## Little Miss Giggles (Apr 1, 2009)

What a nightmare, so sorry. Could DH ring them and ask what the problem is? It could be something simple like the contact detail thay have being incorrect. Hope it gets sorted soon


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## Poppets Mammy (Mar 7, 2011)

Ah starbaby   Delays like that are awful and seem a nightmare at the time, but prehaps your social worker is right and its just not the time for you guys, and in June you might get a lovely sibling group placed straight away, try and stay  

Id deff have DH chasing them up and asking what the problem is  , hopefully it is something simple like LMG says, or bad communication within the department. Hope you get it sorted soon


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Oh how frustrating for you!  (((((hugs)))))  Yes, get DH to chase.  But also, why don't SWers ask for these things at the START of the process, so they have months to chase them if need be?!?!  Argh!


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## Anjelissa (Jan 11, 2007)

Hi starbaby,

I'm so sorry to hear that your panel has been delayed.   

I agree with the others I'd definitely get your DH to chase his previous workplace.

Some of our references took a while and could have possibly delayed things, luckily we had a really good SW who advised us in time of the ones that were outstanding. We really had to 'bug' some people!  (all professional ones, not personal ones). 
When we finally had them all sorted our LA's admin dept then went and 'lost' all our personal ones    so we then had the embarrassing job of asking our personal referees to please submit a duplicate (some hadn't kept a copy so had to write them again   ).
It's always something isn't it! I'm sure all of us have some kind of story like this to tell.

I really feel for you though as I know how frantic and stressed we were at the last minute trying to get the outstanding bits and pieces in and it's not easy when you are relying on others (who don't appreciate the urgency) to do their bit.

Like you said, maybe it's 'meant to be', I truly believe in that and I'm sure when your siblings come along the delay will all make sense   

I hope everything comes together for your next date so you have no further delays.

Anj x


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## thespouses (Jan 5, 2006)

Our panel was slightly delayed owing to not having time to meet one of the referees but the SW said that she needed to wait till the HS was nearly finished so she knew what to ask them. Next time I think I would probably ask when the referee meeting would take place and prime the referees/find out their availability for the next few months and let the SW know.


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## Mamaji (Jan 21, 2011)

Hiya

Thanks so much for all your replies    

We are much calmer now and more accepting that these kinda things happen.  Good news is that DH emailed the personnel manager from his previous work - he had to reword it about 4 times   because it was either too aggressive or too sarcastic... final draft just said things matter of fact .... why have you not done the reference, when do you plan to do it and reminded her that her lack of response had caused our panel date to be cancelled.

Amazingly she replied five minutes after he sent the email!!!!  Apparently the admin assistant who had been receiving all the emails (for some strange reason only known to her) had decided to file all the sw emails into her "dealt with" folder ... WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!     Personnel manager said that she found 10 emails from our sw requesting the reference and that she was going to have serious words with the admin assistant.  I used to work for the same company as DH and the admin assistant used to do work for me ... I used to do it myself rather than delegate things to her as she could never retain anything I asked her to do   so I guess I'm not surprised at what she did.

Good news is personnel manager will have sent reference away now so we should be good to go in June fingers crossed  

Please please please make it happen  

love to everyone xx


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Oh that's great, star!  I'm so glad your DH found the right words (!) and that it got such a swift response (and swift retribution for the assistant with the dodgy filing skills!!!)  Hooray for you both!!


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