# Scared to try again



## sallyliz (Apr 15, 2012)

Hi everyone,

This is my first time back on here in a long while - we were blessed to get pregnant on our 2nd round of IVF, and I have the most perfect 16 month old little boy imaginable. I always said that if we were lucky enough to get one miracle, I'd be happy with that and we wouldn't try for a sibling. Our odds were never great anyway - my AMH in 2013 was 0.6 and we were told we had a less than 5% chance of IVF working. So with only 4 eggs at EC we beat the odds and I thank god and the universe everyday that we were the lucky ones.

And now here I am thinking about doing it all again. I'd love to give my little boy a sibling. I was so terrified of miscarriage, still birth and SIDs that pregnancy was horrid and even the early few months after he was born were filled with fear. I'd love to have pregnancy and the newborn stage again and not be so, so scared of loosing the baby.

But I daren't even try in case we fail. Not even naturally, I won't let my poor DH near me! I know it would never work naturally anyway, but then part of me thinks maybe, just maybe...

I know I probably sound completely crazy! Anyone else in the same position? 

xx


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## 100480 (Mar 10, 2014)

Sally, everything you've said sounds exactly like me! Having been so lucky to have success with our first ICSI cycle and having 5 frozen blastocysts, we felt really confident and we did always plan on having treatment for a second child and thought it would happen with our first FET. I also felt all the feelings you did about miscarrage, SIDs, etc. I think these are very normal worries for any parent, in particular ones like us who have been through so much more to conceive that child.

Personally, no matter how absolutely besotted with our DD that we are, we couldn't leave 5 embies in the freezer and not give it a go for a sibling. Did you have any embryos left to freeze? If so, you need to have a long think like I did as to whether I could just let the frosties expire and not give then a chance. It's a much bigger decision if you have to start over fresh again, so again just have a long, hard think, if you didn't give it one or two more goes sooner rather than later, would you or your partner live to regret it. We're all terrified of the cycle/cycles failing, but as I've said, before allowing lots of time to pass which would lower the success chances, consider your feelings if you don't give it another go.

It took me until my third FET to get to be 11.5 weeks pregnant now, and I cannot wait for my DD to have a sibling to play with. It was hard to go through a BFN and a chemical pregnancy, but I'm so glad we did go for it otherwise I would have regretted not trying. Best of luck with your decision, if you feel I can help at all please ask away. Rest assured you don't sound crazy at all, many of us are in the exact same boat! Xx


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