# Where do we begin?



## louise48910 (Jun 28, 2014)

Hi, have very recently after a couple of years of investigations and private consultations been told that my partner (male) and I will be unable to conceive a biological child so are going to start to look into donor conception to see if it's for us. I've no idea where to begin and don't know what the process is. I think our original clinic said get back in touch if we think we might want to go with donor (they explained it would be difficult due to UK shortage as a result of the changes to anonymity so we're aware of that). We will do that in the coming weeks. I've seen posts on other boards about people going abroad/getting sperm from other countries etc but I'm a bit confused about the circumstances that would call for different things. Is there a post somewhere on here which may explain things?


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## bundles (Jul 16, 2011)

Hi Louise 

Sorry to read your post. If you are just looking at donor sperm then it may help you to read some of the threads in the Donor Sperm section :
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=550.0

Good luck

Bundles x


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## louise48910 (Jun 28, 2014)

Thank you for the responses. I'm really struggling to know how to grieve my own child. It might sound silly but I don't know how to do this. I actually feel a relief now that we can stop these years of appointments which have never led anywhere. I know I should take 'time' and I certainly don't want to rush into anything right now.


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## marty123 (Dec 26, 2015)

Hi, louise48910! Sorry seems I've read your post too late. But still have a couple of things to share as for de ivf. Like you we spent years TTC doing all possible testing (both of us), had less invasive shots but all in vain. Then decided to go privately overseas. I feel like you haven't considered this option seriously yet. But I should say that the devil is not so black as he is painted. We also had lots of controversial things and fear at the beginning of the journey. But the first reason we began seekiing a good variant abroad was the try to save some money. (We had already spent a fortune on the fertility treatment so couldn't go on with the previous sums of money). 
To cut a long story short, i wanna say this is really much cheaper to apply for egg donation abroad. We're currently passing our de ivf round#2 in Ukrainian clinic. This is the de ivf program of 5 shots for 9900 euro. It says that in case of 5 failures they refund all money paid. This was also surprising the needed meds cost was also included into the package price. So we didn't worry about ordering them additionally. 
Feel free to ask more if you want. There are really so many options and clinics nowadays it's really hard to choose from. Wish you all the best


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## louise48910 (Jun 28, 2014)

Hi Marty, thanks for your reply. No, we've not considered going abroad as we've not yet contacted our local clinic. I think our local clinic does 3 or 5 goes at IUI then one IVF. Does your experience abroad apply to donor sperm too? I'd have to look into that as we'd go for non anon donor, again i've not looked into it so not sure how that would factor into things. Hope things are now going well for you


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## louise48910 (Jun 28, 2014)

Thanks Beattie  Will give them a call in the coming weeks. I think I'm ready for finding out more and counselling at least. It might be a good venue to explore our thoughts/feelings as since the recent 'it's not going to happen for you both' appointment I've been feeling OK and I feel weird that I feel OK. Glad to hear you're feeling positive about it. Hope you get your family x


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## liz88 (Jun 10, 2015)

If you are planning to do egg donation, the best option is obviously Cyprus!


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## annasss (Feb 8, 2017)

liz88 said:


> If you are planning to do egg donation, the best option is obviously Cyprus!


Hi, sorry for being late to this post but why Cyprus? What is special there?


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## Ljp64 (Nov 23, 2013)

We went to Spain for our DE cycles and I'm now 38 weeks. Do you have time to wait and visit the Fertility show? I went and it was great as all the major clinics from U.K. and abroad were there so I could talk to them about my individual situation. That's where I found my clinic. 

Good luck


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