# waiting for a match



## ladygardener (Feb 4, 2013)

Hi Everyone,

I'll start by giving you a bit of back ground, I have 2 boys from a  previous relationship concieved naturally ( 12&9) and was sterilised 8 yrs ago. I've been with my DH for 8 yrs and we would love to add another child to the family. After a lot of reserch and disapointment we decided on IVf and  egg share.
I have been accepted as a donor in January and we're currently waiting to be matched. I'm taking Metformin and Microgynon. 
I'm hoping to get to talk to others going through this process and get any advise you may have to give us the best chances of this working first time as I don't have to option of another go.
I've stopped having caffene and alcohol and I've improved my diet and lost 1 stone in weight.
Feeling a bit stressed out at the mo as we're waiting for next stage and I have a tendancy to over think everything  

Lady Gardener


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Hi Ladygardener

I am feeling rather stressed and impatient myself so if you ever want to talk feel free. 
My background is that I started the process as a single person after a relationship failed and I decided that I wasn't prepared to wait any longer. Therefore I went to my clinic in September to start the process but because I was on medication I only had the relevant blood tests in March and I'm still waiting for the results   These results will then tell me whether I have been accepted to egg share which I guess then means I will be back to waiting which is so daunting and frustrating.

Have you had any news?


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

I was very lucky ... had first consult Feb 2013 and was matched April2013 -after all the necessary tests etc.
Waiting to start AF this month so I can start the pill ... hopefully all systems go! 

Good luck - keep me posted x


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

I'm currently waiting to be matched & the wait is driving me nuts  

Results were back on 16/04/13 so it's only been 2 weeks but everyone seems to get matched so quickly??!  It's so hard to remain patient & not start over thinking everything.  

Ladygardener & tatty84 - Are either of you any further forward?

Dickinson34 - congrats on getting matched so fast! It's probably first time in your life you've been willing AF to come early!!  Good luck once the process all starts


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## incywincy (Nov 13, 2011)

I didn't get matched quickly! It was 6 weeks after I got my results and I found it really hard as it seemed everyone on here at other clinics got matched so much more quickly than me.  I was told the standard time at my clinic was 3 months from initial consultation which it was in the end.  It felt like a lifetime when I was waiting.  

Good luck to you all, hope it happens soon.


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Thank you incywincy - it's nice to hear that it can take a little longer for others too as I'm going insane and becoming slightly obsessive over all this after only 2 weeks!!  Did you just wait for clinic to get in touch or were you constantly reminding them that you were still there?!  

We haven't been told a timescale but with the shortage of donors had thought we'd be matched by now, especially as had been told they'd approached a potential recipient on day we got results!


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## incywincy (Nov 13, 2011)

I did email a few times but didn't really get any joy.  I did feel like I needed to keep reminding them I was there!

My clinic actually has a surplus of donors.  Last April HFEA started allowing clinics to offer more money for donors so there are women who donate altruistically and earn £750 in the process.  Apparently my clinic (Care) has had a big influx of these women (single mums on benefits desperate for money according to my doctor) and there's now more donors than recipients, which is why they have a waiting list for donors and sharers.

I don't think it's helpful when they tell you they've approached a donor because if it doesn't happen you know she's said no and you wonder why.  Though being a recipient of donor sperm I know it's simply a choice between hair colour or the best height so it's not really a personal slight.  Still frustrating though.


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

I emailed last week & toying with idea of it again this week - a weekly reminder that I'm there!

Wow, I guess if its helping thats something.  We're self-funding at an NHS hospital so not sure if they will have the same amount of women showing up to donate.  I was told there were plenty waiting, but then why haven't we been matched?!

We will also be using a sperm donor so I know what you mean.  I think it's my BMI as its 27 but I'd rather they told me she'd said no to at least stop me wondering!

Are you in your 2ww incywincy?  Fingers crossed!


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Hi - i couldn't believe i managed to get matched so quickly either ... I've never wanted a AF so badly and now having to wait 21 days for it is going to kill me .... better not be late!!! Grrrrrrrrr


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

dickinson34 - you're so lucky to have been matched so quickly but as with everything in this process we're always waiting for something else to happen, AF now in your case.  Mine is due in about 2 weeks and I just don't want to miss that cycle if possible but knowing my luck...


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Bibbibi - I missed last week by 2 days ... so you can imagine how annoyed I was with myself ... my body was only doing what was natural to it! If I', worrying about waiting 21 days to start I hate to think what I will be like if we make it to the 2ww!!

I'm very lucky that I have 4 daughters already to keep me busy, I was sterilised back in 2009 when I was with my ex-husband, but due to my divorce and meeting my soul mate who has no children, we've decided to egg share! I'm hoping my body remembers that it needs to hold on to sticky embies!!

I'm sure you will be matched and started asap ... Could even be going through it together!!!


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Nightmare!  The waiting drives me nuts - the 2ww will be horrendous!  We've already decided that DH is taking time off for that and we're going to head out for days all over the place to try and distract us both!

I'm sure the 21 days will fly past & your body will be holding on to those sticky embies before you know it!


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Keep me posted with your progress ..... I've booked the first week of 2ww wait off (all being well) and seeing as it is somewhere in July hoping for the nice weather to stay so I can relax and make the most of it .... Will be back the second week of it though to distract me from constantly checking that the big bad AF doesn't appear!!!


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Well I've been matched and will be on the long protocol - just waiting on my pack arriving from the clinic but now we're getting somewhere...why do I suddenly feel sick with nerves?


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

That is exactly how I felt .... all seem very real!!! 
Amazing that your matched!! Hope it all goes well .... Lets hope we are going through it together!!!


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

dickinson34 said:


> .... Lets hope we are going through it together!!!


 There's a possibility that I will be starting the nasal spray around 20th so you never know, we might be!!


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

That would be fab .... starting together!


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## Alexandra29 (Oct 10, 2011)

Hello All,

I really hope you dont mind me jumping on your thread here but we've just been matched for egg share also and i was looking for other people going through the same thing! I'm currently on microgynon until 23/05/13 after which ill start my injections on day 2 of my bleed. I don't have regular periods so they've given me the pill to kick start a bleed. The lady Ive been matched with had actually already started her treatment but the donor (it was an altruistic donor) pulled out at the last minute. I'm not sure of her reasons. So we were expecting a bit of a delay to start but all of a sudden we can start and the clinic will prolong the recipients treatment. I believe she's on progesterone pessaries. It must have been awful for her to be told the donor had pulled out before we came along so I'm hoping this is a positive result for both of us.

Best of luck to you all x


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Wow ... and welcome! I will be starting the pill the same day you start injecting! So only a few weeks behind you! It's so exciting isn't it.
I really feel for the lady your now sharing with... that must be heartbreaking have someone pull out at the last minute! 

How are you coping with waiting etc ... I'm struggling already x


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

So glad to see everyone seems to be getting on well and progressing. I will be phoning the clinic tomorrow to see if my test results are in. I am also hoping I will have a match, is that too much to hope for?

The waiting is really getting to me so don't know how I will feel about having to wait for a match knowing there is no time scale :-(


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## Alexandra29 (Oct 10, 2011)

Hi Tatty84 did you get your test results back yet? All good i hope. Mine were meant to take 6-8 weeks and took 10 i was almost dying and I'm pretty sure the clinic were sick of me ringing every day too!!

Ive not really heard on here of anybody having to wait more than 6 weeks for a match so fingers crossed for you it isn't long at all for you. 

dickinson34 Thanks for the warm welcome, it  is very exciting! Yes i really did feel for her, the donor was almost at point of egg collection so i really felt for her "on the other side" as it were, receiving a phonecall after god knows how long of waiting for her and her DH to be told they have got a donor and then a few weeks later to be told she'd pulled out. I know the waiting time for the recipient can be years. Odd as it is though, i have turned out to be a better match for her than the original donor so I'm hoping this is a good sign for us both!! 

This really is just a big waiting game and when you get over one hurdle there seems to be another doesn't there. 

Ooh just before i go bibidi my bmi is 27 also and i was worried this meant our clinic wouldn't accept us at all but it hasn't been a problem, i see you've been matched now though so fingers crossed for you!

This is our 2nd time of ivf and i cant believe i actually cant wait to get my hands on the needles and medication hehee, i dreaded them last time.

Best wishes to all x


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Hi alexandra29 I phoned Monday and they weren't in yet, they said can take up to 6 weeks but to call again on Friday. I'm just getting impatient but as I keep reading one wait is followed by another and then another so I should be the most patient person in the world when I come out the other side.

Everyone on here seems to be progressing now but it is clear there can be hurdles to overcome. I'm so glad I was directed to this site though as everyone here understands what it is like. I'm finding it hard at the moment with lots people announcing pregnancies. But to hear lots of that on here, strange isn't it?

Good luck to all and look forward to reading your journeys x


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Well i couldnt wait any longer so i phoned in today to see if the results were in. it paid off , they were in and i have been accepted onto the egg sharing programme   

Now on to the next wait   its not too long


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Congratulations!!!! Woo Hoo

I've been like a bear with a sore head this week ... due on on Wednesday (22nd May) and so far this week I've cried in acupuncture, cried dropping the kids off to school .... lost the plot totally at work with my dr's I work for and been a miserable bum bag at home. DP has brought me flowers so I know I must be a woman on the edge as that never happens!!

Haven't even started the pill/drugs yet .... what am i going to be like when that all kicks in!!!


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Thanks dickinson34. Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. I was similar at the beginning of the week but then got some news that took some pressure off me financially and then the news from the clinic which rapidly improved my mood lol.

My next question is how often did people contact the clinic to see if there is any news on a match? Did you phone or email? 

As you can see I'm very eager to get to the next stage lol


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Hi ladies!  

tatty84 - I was matched after just over 2 weeks but I contacted them each week after results were back!!  I just emailed but 2nd week I got the news that I'd been matched so it is helpful (for us maybe not them!) to remind them you're there and chase for results!

dickinson34 - I think losing the plot every now and then on this journey is to be expected and at least the DP bought you flowers!!    Hope you're a bit more like yourself now.  Only a few more days before starting nasal spray now for you - how you feeling about it all?

Alexandra29 - I never thought I would hear someone was excited to get their hands on the needles and meds but I guess its better to be excited about the whole process than dreading it!  I have indeed been matched so BMI wasn't an issue thankfully, but I've lost a little bit more weight so if they weigh me it's now a BMI of 26!  

AF started yesterday and when I called the clinic they said if I had the nasal spray I could start today....  it's not here!!!  So I start nasal spray on 5th June - oh well at least I have a date to aim towards now!


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Bibbibi - feel so much better today thanks!! God knows what the matter was with me this week, think DP thought I was going to implode! I'm getting myself all worked up for next week and I've found out I'm injecting for DR!!! Wasn't expecting that but I'm sure I will be a big brave girl!!!

Hope all is well in the world with you x


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Glad you're feeling better dickinson34 I was a bit like that on Tuesday - lost it with DH   oops!.  Our poor OHs must put up with so much psycho behaviour during this process...and as you say that's without any drugs yet!

I'm a bit disappointed today as could have been starting DR with the nasal spray if it had bothered to arrive, but instead having to wait until 5th June.  

So that means you'll be having 2 different types of injections? DR and then stimms? You'll be a natural at doing them by end of it all then!!


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## Alexandra29 (Oct 10, 2011)

Hi All,

Tatty84 thats fantastic news!!! I am so pleased you've been accepted and are on your way. As for waiting times i really wouldn't know what to expect, but i would definitely be contacting them on a weekly basis . I kind of thought whilst we were waiting for our test results that the clinic must have somebody in mind for us and they'd just be waiting on the  results too so i was expecting to be matched fairly quickly which we were, luckily. Maybe the clinics don't do that though and just wait for the results before trying to match you? 

Bibbidi  -well done you for losing the weight thats fantastic! Thats a shmae about the nasal spray but like you say youve got a date to start now and can kind of get your head round it and prepare yourself. Best of luck to you.

dickinson34 Sounds like you've been having a tough week! It can be so hard to try and carry on as normal and behave normally when you have got so much extra added pressure, stress and worry going on. Its nice that your DH is understanding bless him. I am planning on being a lot calmer this time around, amidst all the hormones on our last go there was one memorable "incident" where i through the sky remote at my DH   We laugh about it now as I'm not like that at all but i guess thats what these crazy hormones can do to you!

Well i hope everybody has had a nice weekend. We are at the clinic Thursday to collect meds and then will be waiting on AF to start stimms on day 2 which i think will be about 8 days away, exciting stuff! xx


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

I do feel sorry for the men! I know we go through a lot emotionally etc but we all seem to unleash it on them .... LoL! I'm extra excited today as my AF has arrived early .... 5 days in fact! I had acupuncture on Tuesday morning and asked if she could make it happen any earlier. She said she would try .... and bugger me, I've come on today! So tomorrow morning I will call the Clinic and start taking the pill! So it all begins!


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

I received my prescription for the pill on Saturday, which just happened to be the first day of my cycle so rushed out to the chemist to pick it up lol.

However, they only included instructions stating to start on the first day. Do we follow the directions? I.e take for 21 days and then break?

Also they gave me 3 months supply, is that just standard?

Hope everyone is doing ok? Xxx


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## Puglover1980 (Mar 7, 2013)

*Tatty* - I would check with your clinic. I am egg sharing at the Lister and was only 'allowed' to start the pill once I had been matched. I started it on CD2 and had to call to let the nurses know and to book a scan. I took it for a total of 12 days, which was presumably enough to synch things up with my recipient. If your clinic instructs donors to start the pill as soon as they can once approved to egg share (even if they're not yet matched) I would still check what they want you to do, as I have read of some donors taking back-to-back packets for synching purposes. And yes, it's standard to practice to prescribe you three months' worth even though you most likely won't need that much.

Lots of luck with your treatment. x


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Thank you puglover1980. I will contact my clinic then. I really hope I won't need 3 months supply as really want to get started. May I ask how long it took for you to be matched? 

How is your treatment going? 

Xx


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## Puglover1980 (Mar 7, 2013)

*Tatty* - it took me a day and a half to be matched!!! My signature has all my key dates. At the time it felt like the while process was taking a lifetime but in reality it was pretty fast. The treatment has been good and my clinic has been amazing. I got a good number of eggs (17, so 9 for me and 8 for my recipient) and ended up with 8 blastocysts. I had my blastocyst transfer today and had one 5AA put back.

Lots of luck to you. xx


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Hi ladies!  

I haven't been placed on pill by clinic so afraid I can't help tatty84.  Did you call clinic & find out what they want you to do?

Puglover1980 - WOW!!  Impressive number of fertilised eggs & congrats on having such good quality ones for freezing.  What's your secret?!    How did you find ET today?  Are you just taking it nice & easy tonight?  Reading your signature, the process seems to have been quite quick from start of meds till now - I hope I'm the same!

I start DR on Wednesday, nervous & excited about whats to come!


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## Puglover1980 (Mar 7, 2013)

*Bibbidi* - loads of luck with your treatment. It's a cliche but once you actually start taking the meds it all goes pretty fast. Luckily I didn't have a very long DR phase. 12 days of the pill and then a week of busrelin nasal spray before I started the menopur. I did stim for longer than average though - I have a high ovarian reserve/AMH so they started me off slowly to reduce the chance of OHSS. ET was good - quick and painless. I'm taking it easy but trying to keep moving around every so often to keep the blood flowing. My clinic doesn't advocate lots of rest or anything - they have you get up straight after ET and use the loo. I wish I had a secret I could impart regarding egg quality! I consumed a crazy amount if protein during the stimming phase along with coenzyme Q10 and a conception multivitamin, so that probably helped. I've also been taking metformin for the last year. I put my husband on Wellman fertility vitamins as soon as we'd had our consultation, so he was on those for just over two months before I had EC. On EC day his sample had improved massively so I assume the vitamins helped. I feel extremely lucky and spoiled with my numbers but I know it's no guarantee of anything. Trying to keep positive though!


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Hi ladies

I took your advice and contacted the clinic. I got the response today and have a recipient, woopie :-D

Now a little bit more waiting before we can get started.

Hope everyone else is getting on well. 

Xx


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Great news tatty! Won't be too long now xx


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## Bibbidi (Mar 15, 2013)

Hi ladies

I've been reading Alexandra's diary and wanted to say Congrats!!!  I think I've congratulated Pug elsewhere - but to you both  

tatty & dickinson - how are you both getting along?

xx


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## sarahj19811 (May 10, 2013)

Hiya ladies

Hope u dont mind me jumping 2 ur thread.

I have been waiting now 4 5 wks, last wk i was matched and within 24hrs she had pulled out due 2 personnel reasons, I have pressured by my clinic regards 2 my weight, when i went 2 initial apt my BMI was 30 but i have already got it down to 28 but still not getting anywhere which has left us looking at other clincs, do u mind me asking who u r all with as u all seemed 2 have been matched real quick.

Thanks ladies 

Sarah xx


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## dickinson34 (Feb 22, 2013)

Bobbie- all good so far here. 10 days of DR done!! Hasn't been to bad to be honest, I inject every morning at 8.30 and I make sure I drink 2-3 litres of water a day to keep the headaches at bay!! Have my Baseline scan on Tuesday at 2pm so I have a 6-7 he round trip for that! 

Hope things are good with you xx


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## tatty84 (Mar 8, 2013)

Hi ladies.

Glad to see so many of you are getting head with your journey.

Sarah- I'm sorry you had someone pull out, I can't imagine how you feel. I am at LWC in London. 

I am still waiting to hear back from the clinic as to Whalen I can get started and until them they won't tell me any details of what will happen then either. Did anyone else have this when egg sharing? I find it a little hard to deal with. When I found out I had a recipient they just said they are waiting for the call to say she has bled and then we will go from there. However they said we are looking at July. Since then I haven't heard anything from them except when I emailed to ask whether u should be purchasing my donor sperm.

Good luck everyone with your treatment xxx


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## sarahj19811 (May 10, 2013)

tatty - maybe drop them an email asking for an update and explained u r concerned.. xx


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## beckha (Feb 22, 2011)

Tatty I'm with LWC Wales and I was given pill after match confirmed but I think it depends on individual protocols or when recipient is wanting to start. 

Just call them and see what's going on. 

We do seem to be kept in the dark a lot.


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