# Foetal Alcohol Syndrome - casually mentioned in Link meeting!



## kirmut (Jan 15, 2006)

We've been considering PAR report for 2 wee sisters who sounded perfect and were just adorable (under 1yr and just 2yr). All going fabulously, perfectly healthy, meeting all milestones, had link meeting and SW just casually dropped in to conversation mid meeting that 2yr old may now have FAS!!!! We knew there was a parental drug background of a methadone programme but no one mentioned FAS. They must have known about this for a while but didn't mention till now. Our SW was really angry with them when she phoned us that evening, as they should have brought it up much sooner. 


Now we don't think we can proceed, yet another disappointment on our journey to have a family. Any advice would be welcome,


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## Faithope (Jan 16, 2011)

Hey kirmut,

You say in your post that the 2yr old may have FAS-have they told you what or when this diagnosis was made? I have read briefly what FAS is and from what I can tell, there are many different  things that may present in children that have FAS. If they are both perfectly healthy and reaching milestones than this sounds contradictory if one child has FAS? if you prefer not to answer this then thats ok its a very individual thing, but just wondered why you say you may not proceed now you know this? I don't have advice as such but would say that I work with some children who come from very difficult backgrounds and although it is very hard to 'get through' to them and get somewhere with them, I would say that it is extremely rewarding  

Again if my questions are too personal then feel free to ignore   xx


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## Daizy (Feb 25, 2011)

Hi Kirmut,
It was indeed very unfair (and irresponsible) of them not to mention it if they knew, though it’s possible this is something which has only very recently come to light – certainly there are things which SW’s don’t always initially know about.
It must be incredibly difficult to get to this stage in a link and then discover it isn’t suitable. I can’t offer any advice other than follow your instinct and your heart


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## Poppets Mammy (Mar 7, 2011)

Hi there, just a quick note. I deal with substance abuse in pregnancy quite often in my job so I know a bit about the consequences and FAS. Like faithope says there are many different forms it can take ranging from very mild to severe. Quite often FAS isn't actually officially diagnosed but is an assumption that it MAY be a cause of mild behavioural problems that have arouse during the Child's life when there's a history of SMU with the mother while she was pregnant. Now if it was severe they would of recognised it at birth and the child would have an actual diagnoses and would of had behaviour plans & support etc put into place from day one. They r obvious physical features present on a child with severe FAS and this will of been looked for when the child was born due to the mothers history. The chances are this child is starting to show mild behavioural problems (the main problem they have is understanding cause and effect) but you need to take into consideration that she is reaching 2yrs which is when most kids start to push the boundaries (terrible twos) and the fact that she is in care is also going to have an impact.
I would get some more information on what exactly r they referring to. It may be that a know it all social worker has identified some mild issues and has put 2+2 together and gotten 5 and has become loose tongued and started banging the words FAS around not actually knowing what they r talking about. This happens quite often. FAS and ADHD r terms that r often used when troubled kids don't 'behave' the way society expects and are terms that should not be used without clinical knowledge and diagnoses. You also need to consider that a lot of kids in care have a 'background' no matter how young and are going to need patience, understanding, time, care and love.

Good luck in your search for more information. I hope you find the family that is right for you soon


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## Old Timer (Jan 23, 2005)

Hi

Before making any decisions you need to find out where/why this has come to light now.  Some children with FAS/FASD don't have the facial features and for some it is hard at a young age to say for definate whether they are on the spectrum or not.  School age is when a lot of issues present themselves and FAS can have a huge effect on a child at this time.

Ask to see the medical advisor if they are not forthcoming with the information, do your research and personally if they are saying this about the elder child what are the chances BM didn't drink during the 2nd pg as well??  Unfortunately where drugs are being used you will often find alcohol issues to but not all the children subjected to this will end up with FAS.

Most importantly, take your time in making your decision, don't let any SW rush you eiither way.

Good luck
OT x
ps I've just read a cpr for a child with FAS and a profile for a child slightly under 2 that hasn't a diagnosis but it can't be ruled out at this stage.


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## Boggy (Dec 13, 2006)

Hiya

Just to say that my DS has a diagnosis of probable FAS - and he is doing amazingly well.

I was at a confernece about FAS last week, and have written a paper all about it.  It's almost finished, and if I can get it done tonight I'll post it in the Resource Centre for you.  

I'll try to reply in more detail later too  

bx


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## Boggy (Dec 13, 2006)

Right, I'm back  

I've posted information regarding FAS/FASD in the resource area. I learned a huge amount at the conference, it was well worth the long long journey to get there  

Strictly speaking, if the 2 year old has FAS, then she will have the facial features and the health team will be monitoring her closely. If she doesn't have the facial features then they may be looking at FASD - (I explain the difference in the resource area   )

At the age of 2, it's highly unlikely she's be classed as having FASD as it isn't until children are a bit older that they can tell.  I was told that if Dino hadn't outgrown the terrible 2's by the age of 4 then they'd be concerned.  Dino has some of the facial characteristics so it's fairly accepted that he has FAS. 

Dino has difficulties with muscle tone, has a small head, 6 month global developmental delay, feeding issues and was sight problems as a baby but he is doing remarkably well and overcoming a lot.  He's totally surprised everyone.  I can see him going on to live an independent life, but there is always an uncertainty and that's the key - can you life with the uncertainty?

A huge number of children in the care system have been affected by alcohol - you could more or less presume that almost all have though it goes unnoticed more often than not.  

In my notes I've listed some useful websites that you might like to look at.

Only you and your DH can make the decision, but it's worth being knowledgeable.

As for us, we have an amazing family and wouldn't have them any other way. Dino is the definition of the term "loveable rouge" but is our little star.  

I'm happy to answer any other questions I can.

bx


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## kirmut (Jan 15, 2006)

Thanks for the posts everyone. Little one has some of the facial features, small head circumference, small hands and feet. Her medic has apparently always said she doesn't have FAS, but now feels she may and wants a 2nd opinion.  We'll wait and see what they come back with before we make any firm decision.
Thanks for the info Boggy, I'm off to read it now.


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