# Looking to Start or Going Through Adoption Part 12 2005



## KarenM

New home girls.  Happy chatting and good luck to all of you on your journey.

Love
Karen x


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## superal

Thank you for the new home Karen - you do a great job of keeping track of us all.

Will look forward to logging in tomorrow & seeing if Molly has had some good news, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for her & will go and say a little prayer for her, not as though I'm really religious, I just some times think it helps.

Looking forward to catching up with everyones news, best wishes to all.

Love Andrea
xx


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## keemjay

well i shouldnt have so impatient yesterday as it got hopes up-  we just got a letter, saying we are being deferred till the jan prep courses, pending the outcome of a home visit in the near future... this is because of our recent fertility treatment  I know its only a couple of months but i sooooo wanted to get going. also it would fit in so well with dh being off work. now he'll have to start a new job and immediately ask for 4 1/2 days off. 
ho hum, i knew the fertility txt was going to be a potential stumbling block so i shouldnt be surprised 

off shopping to cheer myself up

kj x


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## superal

KJ 

Sorry things haven't gone to plan as you wished but SS are quite strict about the length of time from your last fertility treatment, most like it to be 6 months but some like it to be a year until you apply,

SS say it's to give you time to come to terms with the fact that you will never have a birth child & you need to grieve.

I'm on your side though, you know the process will take time & you wouldn't have thought about adoption if you were not 100% committed to it.

It's not long until January - according to Mandy's Christmas count down - it's 66 days till Christmas, & days later its new years eve - then its January.

Try to keep busy, go and do some things you like & spend spend if it cheers you up - that's what I do!

Look after yourself, sending you a hug.

Love 
Andrea
xx

PS your godson is lovely, I'm also blessed to have a lovely god daughter, she is now 9 & I was so happy when her Mum & Dad asked myself & DH to be her godparents.


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## Ruthiebabe

Hi,

we had some good new yesterday. We met our new SW on tuesday and she said she'd chase up the person who holds all the files. Next day she emailed me to tell me that we are not currently being considered for anyone in our LA (which we knew) so she was going to send our form F out to the SW of the sibling group we'd been interested in. Even if it doesn't work out with that family it really feels like we're making progress!!  

Mandy: hope the dads are feeling better soon, and your little one heals up nicely.

KJ: bummer about the delay! It feels like a long tedious process sometimes!

bye for now,
XXRuth.


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## superal

Ruth

What good news let's hop-e you get to hear about the sibling group you've been interested in, keep us posted! 

Love Andrea
xx


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## naoise

KJ I am soo sorry that you have had  disappointment, it really is a pain in the butt when you are waiting for something and then it is held back. But we all know about waiting 

Ruth well done on your good news, it is always great to hear that someone is getting on well.

Nothing much happening here just told work that I would need some time off for my prep course and thankfully they were great about it. Thank goodness.

Hope everyone else is OK. 

LOL Keli


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## Mummyof2

Good news here,   we have been allocated our social worker and we have our first visit from our social worker on Wednesday to start our portfolio and arrange schedules for regular visits.  She is not the lovely lady that did our home visit unfortunately as we all took to each other but hopefully she will be as nice.   Only had to wait a week after we got dh's crb check back so our LA is on the ball which is great.

KJ - sorry about your disappointment but it was not totally unexpected.  January will soon come round and you have Christmas to look forward to first  

Ruth - great news.

All the best to everyone 

Jenny


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## Ruthiebabe

Hi Jen,

you're going to be sooo busy now with your home study you won't know whats hit you, and next thing you know you'll be going to panel! i hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

karen has gone to court today hasn't she....how exciting, I'm going to be such a mess when that day comes for us....am already nearly crying think of how karen and her family are getting on and I've never even met her.....must be PMT time again!  
xruth


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## KarenM

IT'S OFFICIAL!!!

Well the girls and Rich are having a nap and I am sipping champagne!!!  We are now legally the girls parents.  We've had a lovely afternoon and I have been given a lovely bouquet of flowers and the girls have a gift from the LA and one each from the courts (they had to choose it out of a pop up toy tiday thing!) and we've got loads of photos.  Eldest kept talking about her special day and going to see the man with the funny hair!!

We are off to the pub for tea to meet some friends and have a few drinks and then we will celebrate properly in the New Year when both Dad's are better.  We are going to hire a coach on the Severn Valley railway and have a picnic with the family.  Decided it was better to do something with immediate family and something that the girls would enjoy rather than have a party for everyone elses benefit!

Jen - great news on getting an SW.

Thinking of you all (hic)!! 

Karen x


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## Ruthiebabe

CONGRATULATIONS KAREN!!!!!  

enjoy your champers you totally deserve it!   

have a great weekend,
XXRuth.


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Karen - Execellent news!  Congrats to you all.  Enjoy a well deserved evening.

Hobbs - Welcome to the board!  Good luck with your journey.

Jenny - So thrilled to hear that you are starting HS.  

KJ - Sorry to hear about your delay.  January is not far away, you know how time flies.

Keli - Glad work were ok about time off for the prep course.

Ruth - Good news, hope you hear more soon.

Andrea - Hi there!

Hi to everyone else too.

We have some news too.  Our CRB checks are both back and ok, and we should be hearing about our prep course dates by the end of this month.

Laine


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## superal

CONGRATULAIONS KAREN & RICH!

Doesn't it feel great - I don't mean the champagne!

Hang in girls - this will be you sooner than you think! 

Hope everyone is OK? 

Laine good news on your CRB checks, lets hope you get a date soon for your prep course.

Molly - any news yet..............have been thinking about you. 

BFN
Love
Andrea


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## everhopeful

CONGRATULATIONS KAREN AND RICH ON OFFICIALLY BECOMING A FAMILY!

Very well done, at long last. Enjoy your evening x


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## Ann

CONGRATULATIONS Karen, Rich and your 2 lovely girls - I can just imagine your eldest talking about the man with the funny hair    Enjoy your celebrations tonight, you can go to bed knowing that this is it.  You are left on your own now - no more reviews or needing to tidy the house before the social workers come round!!!!!

We have had a very poorly house for the past 3 weeks and it was only last night that we had a whole nights sleep!!  Been busy trying to get organised as we are off to Cornwall tomorrow for a week with my Brother, his wife and their 2 children - who are almost teenagers, so it looks the girls will be sorted as far as mornings and general play time   we are looking forward to playing on the beach even if it is raining and having good old english picnics in the rain!!!! I may even get to have a few   knowing that the girls can be entertained if i feel a bit rough in the morning - I have only had one bad night since we got the girls and boy did Ipay for it the next day !!!!

Hope everyone else is well and looking forward to the weekend!

Take care lots of love

Ann xxxxxxxxxxx


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## cindyp

Karen and Rich,    .  It's such a lovely feeling isn't it knowing that you've passed the final hurdle and the girls are legally yours.  Hope you have a great evening.

Laine, good news on the CRB checks, hope it's not too long until the prep course.

Jenny, great to hear you're going to be starting HS, it seems like ages since you've been waiting for this.  Thanks for the suggestion of the steamer, I had thought of something like that but he's soon going to be out of his cot and he's into everything so I'm not sure how safe it would be for us.

KJ, I know it seems very frustrating having to wait but as Andrea said it's not that long.  Make the most of the time by doing all the things that you won't able to do when you become a Mum and believe me there's quite a few on the list   .

Ruth, good news, let's hope you hear back quickly about the siblings.  As you say even if it doesn't work out it's a bit more positive that they are prepared to put your Form F out there.

Hobbs, welcome to the group.

Andrea, have I missed some news on Molly??

Nothing exciting here, we were supposed to go visit my parents this weekend but we're all under the weather.  Little one has had a cold virus again and this time he's passed it onto us.  I feel a bit better tonight but I've had it all this week, runny nose, aches, shivers and painful hacking cough.  Unfortunately being poorly and not sleeping properly has made our little darling ill-tempered to say the least   .  I love him to bits but boy could I have done with a few days off this week.  I try to look on the bright side that with all the bugs he's picking up from just two mornings at nursery he's building up his resistance before he starts school.  I just hope I manage to build up my own resistance a bit sooner. 

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

love
Cindy


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## superal

Hi Cindy

Molly posted a thread on Wednesday I think it was saying they had received a phone call from their SW & could they ring back - she's headed the thread "phone call" - you can read it for your self.

Maybe jumping to conclusions - I was just really hoping for her, I'd love for someone who is waiting to get matched before Christmas, the children may not move before Christmas but it's so nice to tell people on Christmas day.

I told my Mum on Christmas day about our DS & we'd known about him since Halloween but knew he wouldn't be moving in with us until the January time so we decided to keep quite and not tell anyone until Christams day.  It was really hard work keeping it quite as I wanted to shout it form the roof tops but I just knew it would make every ones Christmas more magical, My mum choked back tears and then the flood gates opened she was really pleased for us.


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## bex32

Hi Karen and Rich x
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! on the final hurdle! Officially, its all tied up and i bet that just feels great! 
I have been reading the posts on and off, but have been so busy with our two, i never seem to find the time to write as often as i should!

Well, all well with us, i have been back to work for 2 weeks and the kids have loved going to nursery! Its a really nice work, life ratio, and boy do i look forward to coming home to see them.  xxxx is now 28 months and a truely lovely boy. At first he was a real handful but the change is amazing, he has benefitted so well with me being off a year with him.   His sister is now 11 months and just perfect.  She smiles all day every day!  They are so happy together we still pinch ourselves they are ours!!  We have just recieved both freeing orders and have submitted the application forms to adopt, so watch this space.  I feel that when it is all legally completed i will relax fully and get on with life.  

Its been a tough old year and life changing but compared to the years of fert treatment, its been really rewarding and fun.  We are now happy and very settled in being parents and am 100% happy with our decision to adopt!  So to all you out there just starting on the journey, sit tight! You will soon be in our shoes and it is so well worth the wait!  Great to read all your journeys! 

Take care everyone lots of love Becky xxx


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## Mummyof2

Karen - CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU ALL.  I was thinking about you on your special day.

Bex - good to hear that the children are loving going to nursery.

Laine - great news on the crb checks coming back so soon.  Your application is proceeding at a nice fast pace.  I'm so pleased for you.  Our crb checks really held us up - 4 months is far too long to have waited.

Ruth - good news from you as well.  Let's hope that it won't be long until you are matched now that your sw is being more proactive.

Cindy - perhaps you could put the steamer up on top of a wardrobe or something?  Our son used to get colds every other week when he was little and it was a real bother as he didn't sleep well then and we were all worn out.  The steamer was a godsend.  Just to reassure you, now he rarely gets colds - about twice a year and they don't last long.  He did get a rash last week which has just about gone.  Turned out he had fifth's disease (also known as slapped face syndrome).  It is a very common contagious rash that looks awful but he was well enough in himself.  Took him to the docs who said that it is very common this time of year and rife in primary schools.  I give him vitamin tablets to boost his immune system as well.

Ann - sorry to hear that you have had illness in your house.  No fun when littlies are ill.

Dh is busy trying to finish off our living room as it is in the middle of being redecorated.  Don't want it to look like a building site for the social worker on Wednesday.

All the best to everyone

Jenny


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## LB

Congratulaions karen and Rich - you must be delighted

well done to you both

LB
X


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## Jayne

Hi

Just wanted to pop by to say .........

Karen - Congratulations to you and Rich.  So pleased for you both   

Laine - Fab news for you too   Good luck   

Bex - Great to hear how well you and your boys are doing   

Love 

Jayne x


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## sophie

Dear Karen

Just popped in to say congratulations to you! What fabulous news! 

Hope the champagne went down nicely

Love
Sx

ps Laine - great news for you too!


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## Boomerang girl

wow karen thats such lovely news!  glad it all went well.

things are all inplace for us now s my crb check is back too. the only drama is that sw keeps assuring us we are going to november panel (24th) but she STILL hasn't shown us the form f! I have sent her a text to say we are free all week so we can meet up, as I am starting to doubt it will happen- I thought the panel needed the form one month before the panel date!  if it gets deferred to december dh can't get time off work so we will need to go to january, and waiting until the end of january DOES NOT SEEM FAIR! we finished all our interviews and paperwork by the end of july. she did the ref checks in september, so why all the delay- there are no hitches, it is just her doing the paperwork. oooh I am getting more and more stressed as I type.

will hopefully speak to her tomorrow. will update then.


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## Mummytoone

Congratulations to Karen and Rich you and the girls did it!!!!!!!!!     So pleased for you, presumably they will have your surname too now?

Just a quick hello from me.No news here, been ill all weekend with gastric flu type thing, chucking my guts up..not nice... fortunately for Adam he is away with the boys on a 4 day golfing weekend in Devon so he is having a whale of a time. No other news from us for now, just plodding on, although we are in the process of having quotes done for a new kitchen and bathroom. Must say its nice not to spending more on IVF for a change  

Love to everyone


Lou xx xx


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Jayne & Sophie - Thanks for your support.

Bex - Nice to see you posting.  Will speak soon xx

Cindy, Ann & Lou - Sorry to hear about being poorly in your households.

Jenny - How are you feeling about Wednesday?  Will be thinking of you and looking forward to hearing how you get on.

Kylie - Can underdtand your frustration.  Hope you get things sorted.

LB - How's things?

Andrea - Another nice post from you.

Nothing to report here.  Hope everyone else is ok?

Laine


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## Pooh bears mummy

Hi Karen and Rich,

Just wanted to add my congratulations to the rest on your special news. I am so pleased for you, you are now officially a family.

Jenny, I hope your first home visit goes well, you have waited sooooooooooo long for it. i am sure it will fly by and you will be at panel before you know it. Good luck hun.

Kylie, I hope you get your form f soon and got to panel, just keep phoning and be firm, if you have to go above your own SW to make sure it is done.

To all you poorley out there get well soon. 

We are off to meet the childminder again tomorrow to finalize the details of when DS start, he will be going for 2 days a week when i go back to work in the new year. I can't belive it has come round so quick. 

Another photo for the album today, he had his first hair cut  

No other news from me.

Off to catch up.

TTFN Mandyx


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## naoise

Hi Karen and Rich,

I just wanted to add my good wishes to you both, enjoy the rest of your lives as parents.


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## LizzyB

Just wanted to pop in to say Congratulations to Karen and DH....hope you all had a fab weekend celebrating 

Laine ~ Yey!!! Contrats to you too for your crb checks.....hope the rest moves quickly for you cos i'm hopping up and down with excitement for you!!

Love, luck and best wishes to everyone else here,

Lizzy xxx


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## Emcon

Hi Ladies

I had typed a really long question and lots of other stuff but I have unfortunately lost it so this is the shorter version, thank god you will think.

I have been reading your post for the last couple of weeks so I hope you do not mind me joining your group.  

We have a little boy aged 4 3/4 (ICSI first time we were incredibly lucky) since then no joy despite numerous FET's and fresh cycles so we have decided to follow the adoption route to complete our family we started this in March this year.

We have had our prep course at the end of August this year and we start our home study this Thursday.  I am absolutely dreading it, I was really looking forward to it as it meant things were really starting to happen, but when our SW called to make appointment she casually dropped into conversation that her boss would be coming along too.  I did query this as I knew others from my course did not have her coming along on their first visit but she said that she would attend everyone at some point and having her come at the start was good because she would know us and would think about us as children came into the system in terms of matching, but I had to go and pressed further and she did admit it was to ensure that we all got off on right footing.  I asked if this was because I had chased to be put on a prep course and she said it was part of it and they were concerned that I did not understand how long a process this was, I did explain that before going on the course we were nowhere as until you attend a course our LA will not do anything further and hence the frustration but we now felt that it would take as long as it took but at least we were beyond the starting post, I also said that we always felt that the left hand did not seem to know what the right had was doing! (They have already carried out all references and crb checks before sending us on the course).  She did then say that she would then want to schedule the rest of our appointments for our home study but I am dreading it, I am really scared that by pushing I have damaged our chances, my husband believes that it cannot be that bad as they did still put us on the prep course and that I am worrying about nothing and that it is also because we already have a child, the SW did also say that they needed to be sure we could love another child and intergrate it into our family.  I understand the need for certainty but this is not a path we have chosen lightly and if we felt we could not love another child in the same way as our son we would not be embarking on Adoption god knows they do not make it easy!  

What do you all think? Any input would be much appreciated, I cannot sleep for worrying about this which I know is ridiculous but this just means so much to me.          

Thanks for listening, I feel better for putting it into words, I bet you are all glad this is the short version!!

Em


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## Ruthiebabe

Dear Em,

i think your husband is 100% right. It costs them money to put you on the prep course so they wouldn't have done that if they had any serious concerns. And don't worry about being pushy, they may not always like it but that's not for you to worry about. Being pushy does not make you a bad parent. Inmy experience SWs are not the most efficient people in the world so hurrying them every now then won't hurt.

The process involves a "second opinion" visit, and uusually it happens later rather than ear;ier., but maybe logistically it's better for them to do it early for you. they may highlight how long the process atkes in your first visit, but I don't think they'd be scheduling all your visits if they were worried baout proceeding with you. In many ways you're a stronger candidate than some of us because you already have lots of childcare experience with your son.

all i can say is relax, you'll be fine, and if you enjoy the home study half as much as I did you'll be be at the end before you know it wondering what you were worrying about!   

XRuth.


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## Boomerang girl

Hi em I think your dh is right too.  They wouldn't be doing this with you if they weren't interested.

I don't think being pushy will stop you adopting, but maybe they do just want to get the ground rules straight and sw feels more confident if her mnager comes along so everyone can be clear. that is not a bad thing and certainly does not suggest you will not succeed!

I think it is pretty common for those of us who have had tx to be what they see as "impatient" as once we have reached a real point of making the decision we just want to go for it!  I do think what they said about loving another child as much as the one you have is just what they say to everyone who already has a child and not something you should feel especially singled out.

Try to use it as an opportunity to get all your questions answered about the process- at least its that meeting with the manager out of the way and they can be busy to track down so it's one less hassle!

hope it goes well,
kylie
x


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## keemjay

Many   to Karen and DH on fridays milestone. hope you enjoyed those bubbles  you deserved it 

kj x


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## Mummyof2

Hi everyone,

Em - we sound very similar.  I have a natural son who will be 5 in March.  We start our home visit tomorrow and we have been told that this will just be an initial visit to meet each other and to schedule the regular appointments.  Should take 1/2 hr to one hour.  I too am a bit worried about it all but that is only natural.  At the moment our living room is a tip as we are half way through decorating it but we will all have to sit in the building site that is our living room tomorrow as we have nowhere else.  I too was pushy with my previous LA as they were useless I felt.  It didn't make me popular.  When we met with sw on home visit we had a 'strong' discussion about the timescales of adoption and I pointed out that there are set guidelines that should be adhered to.  At the end of the meeting we were all cross I felt so it did not go particularly well but we were accepted by the LA and put on the prep course.  Although in the end I swapped to another LA who are much more efficient as I just did not find the previous LA any good and they made lots of mistakes which did not inspire me.  On my prep course I was told that sw prefered someone who was a bit pushy as it was felt that you would be good parents in that you would be able to go up the school and stick up for your child in a constructive way should you feel that the school was not doing something you felt it should ie helping with bullying etc.  Don't panic.  Just be pleasant and assertive in a nice way.  Good luck.

Kylie - great news that your crb check has come through    Any more news about a panel date?  

Now my mind has gone blank for everyone else so I will say bye for now and thanks for all the good wishes for tomorrow.

Jenny


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## superal

Good luck Jenny for tomorrow, everything will be fine, let us know how things go!


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## Emcon

Thanks to all of you for your reassuring messages. 

I agree with all you have said, I just need to get Thursday out of the way so that I can relax and enjoy the process (if that is possible).

Jenny good luck tomorrow, I will be interested to hear how you got on being in such similar circumstances.

Thanks again the support it is invaluable.  I will keep you update.

Em


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## Boomerang girl

so excited just got email from sw to say that the deadline for nov panel is 3rd Nov- she is coming out on the 2nd so we can sign the form f, and I had to email our photo to her today!! so 24th November it is!
what a lovely birthday present. much wine will be consumed tonight!! (like that wasn't gonna happen already!


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Jenny - Lots of luck for tomorrow.  Will be thinking of you.

Em - Welcome!  Look forward to sharing your journey with you.

Kylie - Wow!  Bring on the 24th November xx

Mandy - Hope it went ok with the childminder.

Lizzy B - Thanks for your support, you know it means lots to me.

Hi everyone else.

Laine x


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## KarenM

Hi Girls

Thanks for all the good wishes.  It feels so lovely being a proper family and knowing there will be no more formal reviews.  My SW is keeping in touch as we have made friends with each other.  Used to get to the point we'd be talking about everything else in life other than the kids!!.  Plus I've also applied for a job with Social Services too so could be working together if I am sucessful!

Em - don't worry I think most of us will have been forthright with our LA or SW at some point during the process.  We had a few mix ups along the way but made it clear hat we weren't to be meesed around and found that by being more forthright we got more honest answers even though at times it was not what we wanted to hear but at least we knew whre we stood.  Good luck for Thursday.

Jen - Good luck for tomorrow.  Hope your meeting with the SW goes well.

Kylie - Good luck for the 24th, not long to wait now.

Lou - Hope you are feeling better.

Mandy  - Good luck with the childminder.  I am sure your little one will be fine.  its normally trhe parents that suffer more than the children!!  I feel guilty still but i know they are having a whale of a time (evident by the number of things I brought home tonight!)

Ann - lovely to see you posting.  Sorry to hear you've been poorly but hope it doesn't hamper the holiday and that you have a nice time.

Cindy - sorry to hear the bugs are back in your house.  Hope they disappear soon.  Will it be Xmas in your new house??

Bex - lovely to hear that you are your family are doing well.  Hope you are not feeling as guilty as I do for going back to work.  Can't believe we are both almost at our 1 year anniversaries.

KJ - January will be here before you know it, just think its November next week and Xmas not that far away.  

Ruth - hope you hear something about the siblings in BMP.

Andrea - Hope you are well.  How is dd getting on at school?

Well going to catch up on some other boards now I've put my work files dow for tonight.  Sounds awful, but I've found it a real culture shock to have to watch the clock at the end of the day to get to nursery in time.  I'm so used to working later and getting my work done whereas now I leave early and do some at home in the evenings to keep up.  Ho Hum can't have everything (well maybe a crystal ball to predict the lottery numbers!)

Karen x


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## gillywilly

HI  
kAREN SORRY its late but huge congrats!!!!!!!!!!!! 
Jen hope visit goes well today!!! Let us know.

Well tomorrow is our second home study visit which I cant believe has come round so quickly.

Hi to everybody else.

Love Gill


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## superal

Hi Karen & everyone else 

DD is doing fine at school, had her first parents evening the other day and was told by her class teacher she is one of the quieter ones in the class.

Not at all what we expected, she is very lively and very out going at home so that came as a bit of a shock!

Good luck with your application for a new job, working with SS, I'm sure you'll be the ideal candidate for them.  Just sorry to hear that your job is in danger and you need to apply for jobs else where, DH is not happy at work but at least his job is safe. 

DH is slowly coming around to the idea of maybe having another one, I say slowly as some days he says yes & then our DD or DS will do something and he says NO!  and on that note my dear two have decided to have an argument and I'm going to have to go and sort it out.............school holidays.........they are bored........ .going out soon so hopefully no more arguments! 

Will try and catch up with every one later.

Gilly just seen your message, 2nd home visit tomorrow, your well on your way now, good luck.

Love
Andrea
xx


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## Mummyof2

Thanks for all the good wishes girls.

Visit went fine today, although sw was a bit shocked by the state of the room as we are in the midst of decorating but we told her it should be completed in 2 weeks.  First visit took an hour, other visits are expected to take 3 1/2 hours.  We are aiming at Feb or Mar panel as she will need 3 weeks after weekly meetings have stopped to make sure that all information required for panel is there ie references, form F, portfolio etc.  She said that all LAs will be doing portfolios for people in due course as it is a new thing that has to be adopted by all LAs soon.

We have now booked in weekly meetings until 2nd week in Dec when all visits will stop for sw Christmas parties/meals out/leave.  Meetings will recommence in the New Year.  We will need 8 or 9 meetings in total.  

Got a portfolio A4 book to work through with about 10 A4 pages of questions so we need to get lots of statements from people (family/friends/professionals) to back up our answers and prove that we can do what the questions ask us.  We need to get two statements for each question.  The book includes a single A4 health and safety house check form which we will work through with sw present.  As well as the portfolio book we will be given lengthy additional homework to complete.  SW will bring a copy of someone else's statements so that we can get an idea of what is expected.  Questions are rather daunting I must admit.  One question is the need to prove that we are not racist or discriminating.  We are not but how do you prove it!!  I will feel a bit embarrassed asking someone to write that I am not a racist    We haven't told loads of people that we intend to adopt so they will wonder why I want them to fill out a piece of paper about me so I will have to tell more people I guess.

We will be visited by a lady who has already adopted so we can ask questions from someone like us, rather than a professional.  

Next visit next Wednesday will just be me, the week after will just be dh and the 5th visit will be me and ds.  Seems odd to think that 4 year old son will be interviewed.  She left it to 5th visit so that he would be more used to her by then.  Anyway sw seems very pleasant so that is good news.  

She left us a copy of our feedback from our preparation course so it was interesting to read that and all the nice things that was said about us.  Ds played up in front of sw which was not what I expected to happen but he said that he got bored.  She asked if we watched "Little Angels" and "Supernanny" which I do (but dh doesn't).  Don't think she was implying that my ds is as bad as those children!!  When she left she thanked ds for being so good so that was a relief.

Nervewracking time over.

Karen - good luck with your application for new job.

Gilly - good luck for your second home visit today.

Kylie - woo hoo - great news that your panel date is so close.

Right, off to relax now.

Jenny


----------



## naoise

Hi Jenny,

Just wanted to say well done on getting through the first visit, I'm sure your ds playing didn't worry her at all, as all kids play up. Are you nervous about next week? We are only going for our prep course on the 10th Nov and I am nervous about that already I dread to think how I will be when the home visits start.
They seem to be very thorough and a new thing to think about the portfolio, although I think Northern Ireland seems to be about ten years behind everybody else. Looking forward to hear how you get on next week.

LOL Keli


----------



## Mummyof2

Hi Keli, I am a bit nervous about the 1-2-1 as I don't like to talk about myself much and I know we will be talking about the IVF and the miscarriages so that won't be fun as it is still a very sad topic for me.  Oh well, I have to focus on the end result which will be a child to complete our family.  The things we have to go through eh - and other people just have a pleasureable time in bed to achieve the same result  

Jenny x


----------



## gillywilly

Well done Jenny for getting through the first visit. Its so interesting to read about your experience. every LA is different but new guidelines will hopefully make experiences similar though we were told it will be after we have gone through. I think its fab panel will be so quick though you have done more work before we really are only at beginning but it will be worth it.
Understand what you mean about discussing treatment and miscarriages. We lost a baby this time last year to the week and I know on visit tomorrow it will come up.
Take care
Gill


----------



## naoise

Hi Gill and Jenny

We all seem to have had very similar experiences with the miscs, we had our fifth miscs a couple of months ago and it is still fresh in my mind, but I am trying to put it behind me now and try to realise that this is the road we have to take and that it was meant for us. I was telling a friend on Sunday about everything that was happening for us and how excited we were, and she said that she had some news as well that she was pg. Now this came as a real shock for me as her and her dh are getting on so badly and had been on the verge of breaking up she had given away all her nursery things and said she had enough (she has two boys). So she was lying to my face and saying how they had been planning it for ages and that she had only found out a few days ago. But she had been to the doctor because she had some pains.
Now I thought she could have waited until she knew how far on she was and everything was alright before telling me.Am I being a cow? I just thought she could let me have my moment and enjoy my news. Sory rant over  . It had just upset me as she knows our situation and that we miscs recently.

I do feel better now I have got that off my chest.
Hope everybody is having a good day.

LOL Keli


----------



## Laine

Jenny,

TFS details of your first visit, found it really interesting reading.

Glad it went well for you.

Laine


----------



## gillywilly

Hi Keli
Yes its a tough one but I know I have coped by being more determined that adoption is what is meant for my dh and I. We had friends over last night both sets have adopted and its  was so positive to spend the evening with them. We are so lucky to have met them. They have advised me the miscarriage could be a certain discussion at panel but I am doing ok with it so.
Anyway good luck and I look forward to chatting more.
Gill


----------



## Mummyof2

Keli - sorry to hear about your friend and her poorly timed announcement.  Don't feel jealous of her as if her marriage is struggling it could be that she will be a single parent soon and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.  Perhaps she thought it would be nice that you will both be parents together which is why she told you at that moment?  A lot of people try for another child when their marriage is in crisis in the belief that it will cement the relationship but it rarely does.  I can understand that it must have been a big shock for you and why you feel that she lied to you.    Hugs to you for having to feel like that.

Gill - how lovely that you had such a positive experience with people who have already adopted.  Thanks for sharing that.  My friend adopted last summer and that is what started us on the road to adoption ourselves.  He is a gorgeous child.  I hope the panel doesn't bring up my miscarriages as I will find it daunting enough going to panel without having to discuss something so personal and painful.  The only way I can cope with losing my babies is to think that they were genetically damaged and would have been born hugely disabled if they had survived so it is better they went.  I have a constant reminder every day of how they might have looked when I look at my much loved natural son.  I think it is better not to dwell on it and to move on from what might have beens.  That is what I try to do any way.

Laine - thanks for the thanks if you know what I mean    I tried to put a lot of info in as I know that I like to know the inns and outs of things so hoped my post would be useful to those that have this stage to come.

Hi to everyone else.

Jenny

PS  Lurid orange is great - not long until halloween


----------



## KarenM

Jenny

Just had a funny thought the LA have mine and Rich's portfolio as an example to use with prospective adopters, won't it be funny if they bring you ours!!!

Karen x


----------



## everhopeful

Karen

Just to day good luck with that job application. You've plenty of experience with our side of social services, hope it'll be of some use to you when you succeed!

Know what you mean about being friendly with sw's - we forget what she's come to discuss most of the time, and spend an hour+ on gossip!! It seems sad that her frequent visits will stop soon, hoping she keeps in touch though. 
I think that's the main reason we haven't gone mad with the process - being friends with your sw certainly helps!!

No news from my end.... half term and dd off playschool this week. Enjoying my time with her before I return to work next month. She's got a mask and witches hat to wear on Halloween night - she's going to answer the door with me on Monday night! And hopefully scare off the little monsters begging!! Looking forward to bonfire night too, although we've yet to decide which organised display we'll be going to, but sure she'll love fireworks.

Hello to everyone - hope you are all well. Got to dash and put my baby to bed!

Nighty night x


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Girls

Have been reading this thread for quite a while but not posting untill I had some news, well............


Yipee!! We met our social worker tonight and we are starting our prep course in 2 weeks. They are run over 4 weeks so we will be finished mid December. We have completed our our Stat checks, Crb paperwork and referees. So feel like we are well underway. We are so excited, trying to keep out feet firmly on the ground as we know the process is fairly lengthy! Our SW has said that we should be approved by the summer.

Look forward to getting to know you all

Love
H x


----------



## naoise

Hi waiting to be a mum!!

Welcome to the board  I think you and me will be going to our prep courses around the same time, which will be good we will be able to swap notes 

Our course is run over three weeks so we will be finished on the 22nd of November. We haven't done our med checks or anything yet so I don't know when we do that.
Our sw said that the whole process should take six to eight months so hopefully that will bring us up to around May. That is if everything goes OK. 
Will be great to hear how you get on.

LOL Keli


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Keli

Thanks for the welcome 

Great to have someone else at the same stage as me.  Look forward to swapping notes. We finish our prep course on 3rd of december.

Hi to everyone else

Lol
H x


----------



## everhopeful

Welcome to H - waiting to be a mum,

Hello!

Sounds like you'll be well on your way by Christmas! Once you've started that ball rolling, the time will fly by!

Best of luck to you

xx


----------



## everhopeful

Hi girls

Just a quick word from me (again!)

I've got the not very nice prospect of returning to work in 4 weeks time, and feeling the pressure of that and the nerves creeping in (silly when I've worked there so long). Wanting to crack on and get all my crimbo shopping completely finished before then, thinking and feeling guilty about my daughter having to then go to nursery 4 afternoons a week, and wondering how the hell I'll manage to get everything done. And although we're pleased my dad will have his treatment out of the way before Christmas, we've found out today that his operation is on the same day I return to work. What bad timing! Don't know how I'll concentrate on work (after so long away) when my Dad is having surgery. Luckily it might be that I can start back the following day and then at least I'll get to concentrate on family matters rather than the less important!   Why is it, that everything comes at once?! It just makes me feel like taking extra leave until everything's back to normal! No such luck.

Anyway, thanks for listening, I know I'm far from being on my own in this situation, it just seems like a giant snowball that's hurtling towards me at great speed!!

Moan over. I'll have to get my thinking cap on and come up with some ways to get organised!
My organisational skills have slipped completely since becoming a mum, all I know about now is nursery rhymes and the funny dances that I find doing, even when I'm washing up and can hear dd's cd in the living room!! By, that conjures up a picture!!


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

H - Welcome!  Good luck with the Prep Course.  Look forward to sharing your journey with you.

Keli - Good luck with your Prep Course too.

Ever - I am sure that you will manage to sort everything out.  It helps to offload and the best way of doing so, is by writing down how you feel.

We had some good news today...finally received our Prep Course dates yey!  We start on November 28th (evening), followed by two days and a final day on December 7th.  Dh had a weeks hol booked Mid November, so on Monday he is going to ask to change it.

Laine x


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Girls

Thanks to Ever and Laine for the welcome  

Ever, big hugs to you. Posted to you on the other thread. You are dealing with some tough things.  

Laine, Yeha! great news. You, Keli and I will be doing our prep courses about the same time. Bring it on...

Karen, hope you are ok, been thinking of you  

Hi to everyone else

Love
H x


----------



## Boomerang girl

ever.. I feel so awful for you! as a teacher I spend my whole year wishing it away to the summer hols, then as soon as you start you are about to go back, and dreading it! It is actually the same with every holiday break. there are a few things (not including the kids and teaching time because I love that) oneis thepaperwork, two the politics, three the lack of sleep ins and lack of energy.
I can only imagine that it will be the same when we eventually adopt and I have to go back to work fter eight months (albeit part-time). it will be just like the summer break. right now I am wishing my life away for it to happen, then it will be there, then i willjust get into a routine and it willbe gone.

on top of all that honey you have your dad to worry about!
I think if you can you should dely by a few days- try approaching your employer. I am sure they want a smooth transition as much as you and your mind will not be there that day. I think it is only a bit of a dely nd under the circumstances your boss will be more worried about you being focussed when you come bck than the difference of a day or two.

good luck honey.
x

laine..that is so exciting. as mind blowing as the prep course was, once we had done it we felt like we were real adopters, and being taken seriously. hope it is a good one.
k
x


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello everyone

Sorry no personals but so tired and thought would just pop my head in.

Just had MIL for roast dinner tonight so feeling stuffed and fat!!   

Had really bizarre afternoon when went to get petrol. Pulled up and was waiitng for a pump to be free when this chap (good looking I might add) came over tapped on my window and said 'your beautifull, can I give you my number and take you out for a drink!!!! It was so strange the most embarresing thing was it was only a little petrol station and several other motorists heard. I was so embarresed, it has left me with a little spring in my step I must admit!    Obvioulsy I declined and told him I was married, but how sweet and nice is that??  Must admit has never happend before and will prob never happen again. I think Adam thinks I have made the whole thing up, ha ha. Typical  

No news still from LA, I guess they will get to us eventually. It will be nice to get our teeth into something at last.

Well work tomorrow, hate Mondays  

Love to everyone

Lou xxx


----------



## Mummytoone

P.S Laine thats great news on your Prep course, you are on your way now


----------



## superal

Hi Lou

Your message made me smile........what a way to put in a spring in your step.(you did make sure their was no hidden cameras anywhere & we'll see you on TV soon?,only joking, just jealous!!) 

Love
Andrea
xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Hey Andrea

Thank for the IM, made me smile too, your story. Hey you dont suppose Adam was testing me do you!!!   

Love Lou xxxx


----------



## alex28

Hi Guys

well im delighted to report that we had our first interview today, went great and we are being placed on a prep course for the end of November - eek!

Cant believe things have happened this quickly.


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi  

Lou, fab story. Does wonders for the ego   Hope you hear from your LA soon.

Alex great news considering you have had very recent treatment. Good luck  

No news here. Counting down the days till we start our prep course, yeha!!!

Love
H x


----------



## Laine

Alex - Great news!  We'll be starting at the same time!

Laine


----------



## Barbarella

Hello everyone

Firstly I must apologise for introducing myself a good few months ago, then hardly posting.  I broke my leg in July and we just needed some time to digest everything (it had all happened a bit quickly after the June prep course to be honest)...so put the process on hold for a month or two.  We met up with our SW and she said it was good that we weren't rushing into things, and that we were thinking seriously about everything. 

So we wrote back at the beginning of September and said we were raring to go.  A month off had really done us the world of good.  Typically, they weren't ready for us at that stage, as we wanted to keep the same SW... but now she's given us a date for our first home visit.... which is next Thursday, 10th November.  We are really excited now, especially as we feel ready, whereas last time, we were in a state of panic over it all.

So, I hope I will be here a bit more from now on... picking all your brains and getting used to all your names (I mod my own adoption forum though on another site...so forgive me if my visits are more sporadic than others...).

KarenM, I was really pleased to hear that you are now officially parents to your lovely girls... many many congratulations!!!

Jen... was really good to read about your first home visit, which I will be doing next week... and to get an idea of what they might want from us.  Am not nervous at the moment at all, but am sure we'll be daunted by the end of the session!!!

Anyway, thank you for reading... and speak to you all soon.

Cx


----------



## superal

Barbarella

WELCOME BACK!!

Good luck with next Thursday & glad you are now fit and well.

Love
Andrea
xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Quick one as on lunchbreak...........

We have some news!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We have our initial social worker visit on Thurs 17th Nov at 10am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yippeeee..........

Am having a bit of a panic though as have long questionaire about Health to fill in, hmmm......... 

Back later

Love Lou xxxxxx


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Barbarella welcome back. Good luck for the 10th.

Lou, fantastic news, you will be fine.  

Love
H x


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Barbarella - Good to have you back.  Look forward to sharing the rest of your journey with you.

Lou - Great news!  Bet you can't wait.  You are finally on your way.  

Hi to everyone else.

No news from my end.  

Laine


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello

So any ideas what sort of questions they are gonna ask? 

Just wondering............. 

Love Lou xxx

P.S Havent filled form in yet, bit worried as need to ansa yes to nearly every questions  btw only on 1 tablet at a night now so more or less off the anti d's thank goodness


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Lou

Only thing I can remember was "did we have any mental illness?". DH says I'm mental most of the time!!!

I really think you will be fine. My thoughts would be to be as open and honest as you can. If memory serves me right you had your gp's support and i would think that counts for quite a bit.

I know it's hard, but try not to worry

H x


----------



## KarenM

Hi Girls

Alex - Great news on your prep course date, bet you can't wait.

Laine - you too.  It's November today so when do you start?

Lou - Love the story about the petrol station.  Great news on your meeting.  Don't worry on the medical side of things, I think they expect most couples who have had if tx to have had some form of stress/anxiety.

Barbarella - welcome back, glad things are back on track for you.

H - not long to wait now for you and your prep course.

Not much to report here, having a manic week.  Dad's back in for his chemo this week, saw him last night.  Had an AGM at nursery tonight, Rich has footie training tomorrow, back to see my Dad Thursday and Friday is Rich's birthday.

The girls went dressed as witches to nursery yesterday and had a whale of a time.  They have to go in their pj's for Children in Need next week!

Well best get and check the rest of the boards.  Glad to see people progressing on their journey.

Love
Karen x


----------



## Pilchardcat

*CONGRATULATIONS

LOU & ADAM*​
Wishing you every success with this one Lou 

Tons of love
Amanda xx

Ps, thats a good omen, that's Millie's birth date! 

Pps, Nice one about the chap in the petrol garage....you are very pretty so he was right  gave you a right ole buzz I bet !​


----------



## LB

Hi Girls

Laine great news on your course bet you can't wait to get started

Lou - great news for you and Adam too - can't wait to hear all about it - and DON'T Worry you are gonna be fine XX

hi to everyone else

LB
X


----------



## Sue MJ

Lou - Fab news about your first SW Visit.... lovely to see things getting underway for you and Adam.   

Love your story about being asked out at the Petrol Station - I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often, you are stunning!

Love,

Sue xxx


----------



## Mummytoone

thanks everyone for your messages and IM's, am quite nervous already, I am bound to be. I started rattling on last night to Adam about what we should and shouldnt say..... needless to say he stopped me in my tracks and said we need to act ourselves. Im already worrying about the fact that we have our giant american climbing cat..... think I will say he is just a big moggy      He is such a darling and VERY gentle but you worry about what SW might think, calm down Louise     
Guess we need a little one who likes animal hospital!

Well off to M&S now with Mummy for a bit of retail therapy and chrissy shopping, love it!

Sorry no personals will be back later

Love Lou xxxx

P.S Havent filled questionnaire out yet, need to have a think first


----------



## alex28

HI guys

well we are def going down the adoption route as AF arrived last night so, big sigh of relief now that its all over with.

We have our prep course at the end of the month and i know im so lucky to be given this chance so quickly but then i think "hang on i've been patient for sooo long now and we deserve some good luck and happiness in our lives".

Great to see Laine on a prep course too and theres another lady GIll (mopsy) who posts on another forum with me that has her prep course at the end of the month too!  Great to have some support along with way and great to be able to pick the brains of the likes of Karen, Superal, etc.

Lou - i was really worried about our interview too but the SW's (2 of them) were lovely and it was a really relaxing couple of hours in their offices.  We just went as ourselves and i think thats the way, MY DH said a few things he felt and then said "oh was that the wrong thing to say" and they said there are no right or wrong answers etc.    Hope the shopping went well


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Alex

Really pleased to hear all systems go.  

Iam also starting my prep course this month. There is about 5 of us as Keli is starting as well.

Like you say it's great to have people to share our journey with and to have some experienced people to "hold our hands".  

H x


----------



## LizzyB

Laine ~ YEY  Thought i'd posted to you but not sure if i did now......anyway, congrats on getting the prep course dates! 

Lou ~ fab that things are moving on for you, i'm sure you'll be great  Have fun today!

Love and luck to everyone, Lizzy xxxx


----------



## Pilchardcat

Lou....what's an American climbing Cat ?? and does he/she get on with Harry....can we see a photo please ?? sounds lovely 

Amanda xx


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Karen - Your little girls sound so sweet.  Thinking of your dad at this time too.

LB - Yep! can't wait to get started.  Any more news from you?

Lou - I love Chrissie shopping, did you buy much?  I felt nervous before my initial interview too, however, the sw's were really nice and I soon felt at ease.

Alex & H - So when are your dates for the prep course then?

DH has managed to book all the time off for our prep course and I have returned our acceptance slip today.  So just the waiting now...

Laine


----------



## Mel

Sorry to butt in and i am glad you asked Amanda, intrigued to know what one of those cats are too 

Laine - All systems go for you too, how wonderful, i love reading this thread.

Mel
x


----------



## gillywilly

Hi all
Just got in from work and thought I would play catch up but wow this site issss sooooo hectic. Its so great to be at the start of my journey and be surrounded by so many others. 
As Alex said I am another one on preparation courses 2 days at end of month. We have a 3rd home study visit before as well.
I think that all us ladies on here are a bit special!!!!!!!!!!! For me I am glad you are here to share in the process!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who has 1st course day -mine is 21st November

Hugs and love to all
Gill

PS Alex I am thrilled you are on your way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Wow, what a busy thread.

Hi Gill, my 1st prep course is the 12th of November, yikes!!! 

Laine, great news dh has sorted the time off, are you counting the days?

Have to say I find xmas really hard,    Iam hoping and praying that this will be our last christmas on our own.  

Looking forward to watchinng the program on channel 4 tomorrow about adoption. Any one else going to watch it? I think next week is national adoption week, so probably will be quite alot of tv/press coverage then.

Love
H x


----------



## Mummytoone

Hey dont mean to be vile but..................

 Just wrapped all my christmas presents up


----------



## Pilchardcat

Ohhhhh not again Lou !    every year your the 1st to do this, I remember last year.....so now I'm "not listening - not listening - not listening" !!!   

Love Amanda xx


----------



## Mummytoone

There you go Amanda and Mel

http://www.maine-****-cat-club.com/whatis/


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Lou, Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Can't believe it!!!

H x


----------



## Mummytoone

Amand adn Mel

this is our cats own web page 

http://www.atticusmainecoons.co.uk/web%20pages/conte_fs.html


----------



## Pilchardcat

Wow, Lou they are huge ! Questions now   What made you get one of those types?, how's Harry with the cat?, whats the cats name? and how long have you had one ?  fascinated now 

Love Amanda xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Amanda

Im sure you ahve seen him before in the gallery.

Hector He was a our first baby, they are gentle giants but very gianty. Our weighs in at 9.5kgs which is about 19ibs! He is massive, Sue has seen him.

I will dig a picture out for you

Love Lou xxx


----------



## Pilchardcat

Lou, I knew you had Henry but I didn't know about Hector  how did I miss that   awww they look well cuddly. Thanks for the links

Amanda x


----------



## SueL

Hector is gorgeous and so is Harry!  Hector is huge but soft and adorable!   Lou, all the best for the 17th!

Love Sue
xxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## alex28

Hi

Our prep course starts on the 21st Nov for 3 full days, were told we would then be allocated a SW after that.

Great to see you Gill.


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi all,

those cats look amazing. we got just a normal one....and he's plenty big! Do you end up with fur everywhere?

We have some news, although it's a bit half baked. The sw of the sibling group we are interested in has let me know that they finally received our form F. She hadn't actually read it yet, but at least it had arrived there....only took 2 months!

will let you know if they think they might be interested in us,

XXRuth.


----------



## Mummyof2

Hi everyone, loved the cat info. They look gorgeous.  We have 3 cats - just ordinary types but one is a huge cat and must weigh almost 2 stone.  We got him from a farm so he is just a moggie but very heavy and big.  He is tabby and white.

Had my1-2-1 today.  Took an hour and a half and went ok I think.  Just chatted about my early life, memories, schools and jobs to date.  My weight was mentioned as expected.  In anticipation of this I went to the docs a couple of weeks back and am now on reductil tablets so should lose 20lbs within a year.  Lost 5lbs in 2 weeks.  Sw said that was good news and well done on trying to get weight sorted.

Good luck to all those just about the begin prep course.  We took ours back in Feb/Mar so it seems a long time ago now.

All the best to everyone.

xx


----------



## naoise

Hi everybody,

Lou your cats are gorgeous!! We have a little siamese called Naoise she is beautiful. But I'm biased.

Gill my prep course is on the 10th which is this day next week, I am really nervous but I'm sure we will be OK 

Lou how can you be so organised I haven't even started yet. 
Nothing to report I am just on the countdown to our prep course and organising time off work for it.
I'm off now to walk my dog who is a weimaraner called Sorcha.

LOL Keli


----------



## Mel

Lou - Those cats are fab, they are so fluffy and cute (huge but cute) Gorgeous.

Mel
x x


----------



## superal

The cats you are talking about I'm pretty sure were featured in the Harry Potter films, Flinch the care takers cat!!

My friend has two of these cats and they are huge, it was her who told me about the Harry Potter film so if it's wrong SORRY!!


----------



## Mummytoone

Yes they were in the Harry Potter film..... AND my cats breeder was actually approached by the film makers to use on of her cats.
They didnt in the end as they would not borrow him and would only insisit on him being bought and moved to the US and she wouldnt part with him. Dont blame her.

They truley are the most magnificant cats.


----------



## keemjay

hi all, wow its been busy on here lately 
lou - chuckled when i read about your petrol station experience, how lovely! And then I  at reading about wrapping pressies, omg its only just NOV!!!! and as for your puss - what a giant!!

Laine - wow things are moving quick for you 

we have news too - we have a social worker coming round on tues 15th nov to chat and hopefully agree to us starting the prep courses in Jan....am pulling my hair out tho as am going to court early next year as a witness to an incident in our road and they have asked for any dates i might not be able to attend court. i have rung the LA about 6 times now to find out what the dates are for the jan/feb courses and nobody seems to know!! they say someone will ring back and they never do, i'm starting to feel like a pain - really dont want to get on the wrong side of them at this stage!! I think i have miised the deadline by which i'm meant to let the police know so in the event of a date clashing i will just have to let the court down 

other news is that we get a puppy in 2 weeks time, am soooooo excited  

kj x


----------



## magenta

great to hear about your journeys - and your giant cats!  We are pet free but would both love a cat if we lived in a bigger house withmore garden for it to play in.

no news on the homestudy yet as we only got the forms in last week due to a change in DH's work situation which meant we couldn't send in the employers information We are still waiting to hear who has been allocated as our SW but reckon we'll hear next week.  Also, thanks to orlistat have lost 4kg this month towards my 'healthy mummy' goal weight .

magenta x


----------



## KarenM

Hi Girls

Lou - still can't quite picture how big the cat is but looks big and fluffy.  Only have 4 presents left to get and will then have a massive present wrapping session with a brandy and Its a Wonderful Life DVD when Rich is out one night, my annual tradition.

Andrea - I am currently reading the Harry Potter books, have seen all 3 films and now the 4th one is out on the 18th Nov.  Only on the second book though.

Well done to Jenny and Magenta on the weight loss.  Have been trying to count my WW points this week but have failed miserably with dad being in hospital again (I have put 1 stone on in 6 months - eek).  I have brought a load of veg to make soup this weekend and plan to take it in a flask to work.

Dad now has the date for his op but it means he will be in hospital for Xmas, so trying to plan what we will be doing.  

We have our 12 month anniversary coming up on Tuesday , can't believe our eldest has been with us for so long.

Have a great weekend everyone

love 
Karen x


----------



## Barbarella

Thank you ladies for the welcome back...

Good luck to everyone for their appointments... (bet you're glad this is all behind you Karen..lol?).

Will report back after our meeting.  DH and I have to go thru the Form F on Sunday... we are dreadful at doing things like this, and leave everything to the last minute... best get used to it... 

Love Cx


----------



## superal

Hi everyone, hope you are all well!

I'm another one of those very organised people who have bought all their Christmas presents and have them falling out of my wardrobe and stuck in boxes under our bed, good job it's King sized!!

Karen: I've read all the books, the latest one, Harry Potter and the half blood prince took me 6 days to read, I couldn't put it down and I needed to know the rumor was true!. (a main character dies but I'm not telling you who, you'll have to read the book)

On another note, we received a letter trough the post today from a family in America who did concurrent planning.  We were put in touch with them when our baby "S" was returned to her BP'S.  We've kept in touch but let it slip a bit in the last year.

Anyway it was really nice to know how the family are doing, the Mum "W" wrote and myself and DH were so honoured that she had wrote to us and shared how she was feeling about contacts with birth families.  "W" has 4 children through concurrent planning and 2 of the BM to 2 of her children no longer have contact with "W" children.  She wrote to tell us how great she felt about it all as it finally means she can move on with her life and not have to think about the impact of meeting BP'S that it has on the rest of her family.  (Sorry if that doesn't make sense)

I know how she fells, I no longer do a contact letter for our DS birth mum and it looks like we won't be doing a contact letter for our DD birth family as well.  I will be very honest and say it has never really bothered me doing the contact letters, it's only once a year but as they have become older I've found it hard knowing what to write.  I can't send any photos's that will give anything away as to where we live, so a school uniform photo is a NO NO as they could trace the uniform!! 

When you first find out about your children to be, you will agree to almost anything, we are no different from anyone else, we are lucky that it's only a contact letter once a year, other people I know have agreed to meeting the BP's once a year, some with their new children, others with out. 

The letter really made me smile, her children are so happy with them, you can tell by the photo she sent.  I'm glad for her and her family that she know longer needs to do contact. Just thought I'd share this with you, hope I've not bored you with it all.

Love Andrea


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## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Girls

Not sure if I will get time to post next week so thought I would pop on to wish Keli good luck for the start of her prep course on Thursday.   You will be fine.

Andrea , Not bored at all, love to hear all your news.

Barbarella, hope you have reviewed your form F and all is in order. 

Karen, sorry to hear your dad is going to be hospital for xmas. Will be thinking of you on Tuesday, where has that year gone?

Magenta, great news on the weight loss, Iam sooo jealous!

Kj, good luck for the 15th, I love puppies, sorry Iam just not a cat person, although think I would like Lou's as it looks rather gorgeous.

Jennifer, great to hear your 1-2-1 went well. You seem to be well on your way now 

Ruth, keeping everything crossed that you hear something from the sw soon.

Hi, to Lou,Alex,Gill and laine sorry if I have missed anyone out, not intentional! Good luck whatever stage you are at. Going to be a busy time with lots of us starting our prep courses. Must say Iam starting to get a tad nervous  

H x


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## Pooh bears mummy

Hi everyone,

Just got back from our 1st family holiday. We took Ds and my parents, a very proud granny and grandad away for a week in Devon/Cornwal and it has been great.

We ran along the beach and Dh and granny got caught by a wave and had wet feet for the reat of the day  .

DS dressed up as a pumpkin for his 1st halloween, outfit made by granny. He looked sooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute.  

Also attended his 1st bonfire and fireworks display. I wondered if he would cry at the bangs but he was just mesmerised. I kept saying to him twinkle twinkle bang before they started so he seemed OK. It was at a place where I spent all my childhood holidays and 1st went about the same age, so it was a very special week for us all. 

He was so good on the 6 hour car journey aswell, aslong as he had a balloon to keep him happy or as he shouts BA,BA,BA when it drops down into the foot well and mummy has to rescue it.

It is nice though to be home and in our own bed .

Will try to catch up on everyones news this week.

TTFN Mandyx


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## Emcon

Hi Everyone

Sorry after all your support I haven't given you an update sooner but been quite busy getting all info together for our SW.  Well we have now had two home visits with our SW.  The first was awful as I thought it might be, if anything it was worse than I thought but we have managed to move on from that and the second was more positive and certainly more productive.  I do find these meetings quite stressful but I know we need to get through these to realise our dreams.

We have four more home visits scheduled before Christmas and then the rest in the new year.  We are due to go to panel in the Spring if we get that far, I keep expecting them to tell me we are not what they are looking for.  I am really surprised at how quickly things seem to be moving since we have done our prep course.  

Our son Jake met the SW on the second visit, (only for 10 mins just to get him use to her in readiness for her chat with him) well what can I say he excelled himself, he told her he is allowed to climb the really big ladder into our loft and that if he is naughty daddy has told him he will leave him up there.  Needless to say my  hubby and I were speechless, the SW asked him does he go in loft of his own and did he think daddy was only joking about leaving him up there to which he replied (we held our breaths for what seemed an age) no of course not his daddy is only joking and he cannot get up there without daddy's help! She did comment that you can always rely on children to drop you in it.  

I hope everyone else is doing ok.    

I will keep you posted.

Em


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## alex28

Em - your son sounds lovely!  Glad the visits went well.  How long ago was your prep course if you dont mind me asking.  We have our end of the month.

Mandy - the holiday sounds fab and it brought a tear to my eye thinking thats what we could be doing possibly next year.

Im so glad all of you that have adopted post on here as it certainly gives me hope. xx


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## cindyp

Hi Ladies

Sorry I'm a bit behind with everyone.  Spent a few days in bed with a nasty sinus infection, felt a bit of a wuss but the doctor said I looked "rubbish" and prescribed me antibiotics, painkillers and more bed rest.  It really confused Junior who couldn't understand why his Mum was lying around looking pathetic.  The benefit was that I lost 7lbs in less than a week, unfortunately I've started eating again and it's all gone back on   .

Slight pause there, my DS does not want to go to sleep tongiht!!  

Sorry, was going to do personals but have spent 2 hours trying to get my DS to sleep and then my best mate phoned and I've been talking to her for ages so 2.5 hours after I started this post I'm going to have to finish it without actually writing anything as my DH wants to go to bed.

Will catch up later.

Cindy


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## everhopeful

Hi girls

Just a note before I get into bed... dh's glued to his x-box game so I'd thought I'd have a look before zzz'ing !!

Our darling girl woke me up at least 4 times last night, crying in her sleep, at one point she was sat up in her cot whaling. Can only be nasty dreams that are having this effect (I hope anyway), but can't see anyway to stop her having them. It's not like she's witnessing anything scary or violent before she goes to bed! She's in a lovely routine and enjoying nursery, she's a very happy full of life little thing who adores attention and cuddles etc. She's been with us 6 months almost and before that she was with a loving family for 19 months - since she was 3 weeks old. So any previous experiences cannot be remembered, surely?
I can't think why she'd be having nightmares, and it's not like she can tell me about them. So I don't know how to help her. Well help me, really! I'm exhausted!!

Other than that, things are going well. We enjoyed Bonfire Night immensely. The best firework display we've seen in years, and xxxx loved the "pretties" in the sky! I felt quite emotional during the display, holding tight onto my baby girl and saying farewell to the past. 
We made an effort on Halloween for the first time ever! DH carved out a pumpkin and put it outside all lit up! We had more trick-or-treaters than ever before! xxxx dressed up in her witches hat and mask and went to the door with me to hand sweets out! Got some cracking pictures of her with the pumpkin!!

We're off to, hopefully, get some crimbo shopping done in morning. Well that's the plan anyway. We've no-one tagging along and diverting us, just mummy and xxxx, oh! and the buggy of course! It's amazing how little she manages to grab at whilst strapped in that thing!!
Only 3 weeks til I return to work. Not a great prospect. But with my Dad having his op same day I return, I want to get all shopping done and dusted, cos I'll have enough on my plate come end of month!

And the plan to do the whole "meeting Father Christmas" thing has been scrapped for this year anyway. When we've visited anywhere that has anyone dressed up or a life-size Santa in a shop window, she freezes and clings to me for near death! Don't want to take her and put her off for life!

Right, that's me done, I need to relax and get some shut-eye - well hopefully anyway!


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## Mummyof2

Ever - sounds like the night terrors to me.  They usually arrive around aged 2 and can affect any child, adopted or not.  It is just a stage that some children go through where they have nightmares for a few months then grow out of it.  Don't worry, they don't remember them when they wake up or even remember waking up.  Do a google search for more info on night terrors.

Em - sounds like Jake dropped you in it.  My son did the same when he told the sw that he wasn't allowed to see his friend any more as he had pushed him off the slide in our garden.  This was true but was back in the summer and since then his 'friend' had bashed ds's head against a concrete pillar in September which is why his mum and me decided that our two boys had better not play together any more as they were too rough with each other.  I had to explain this to the sw and she said that it was best they did not play together any more.  My son's explanation made it sound like he (ds) was a wanton bully!!  I was mortified.  He then rolled on the floor, sulking and refused to get up and kept saying he was bored and wanted the tv on.  Oh the joys eh!!

Cindy - nice to hear from you.

Dh has got his 1-2-1 with sw tomorrow.  I've made copious notes of my homework but got to type it up yet.  Took about 2 hours and I've still got an hour's typing ahead of me.  Don't know how dh will fit his homework in with his work and long travelling that he does.

All the best to everyone

Jenny


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## Emcon

Hi everyone

Alex to answer your question we did our prep course the 2 days in the last week of August and 2 days in the first week of September.  Reading this board the LA's appear to all work differently, we had to prep course before they would consider starting home study, but as I said before it does all seem to be moving really quickly now.

Jennifer, yes he did (Jake) drop us right in it, I am sure she will follow up with more questions from what he has already said to her, I dread her one to one with him, he does have quite an overactive imagination.

Em


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Jenny - Thanks for sharing your 1-2-1 experience with us.  How's the HS going in general?  Oh and well done on your weight loss.

Keli - Good luck with your prep course, look forward to hearing how you get on.

KJ - Good news on your initial visit, not long to wait now.  So what type of puppy are you getting?

Karen - Sorry to hear about your dad not being home for Christmas.

Em - Jake certainly knew what to say then!

Cindy - Sorry to hear you have been poorly.  Well done on the weight loss.

Ever - Hope your dd doesn't have too many night terrors.  Also hope your dads op goes ok.

Mandy - Glad you had a nice holiday.

Magenta - Well done on the weight loss!

Ruth - Hope you hear something soon.

Hi to everyone else.  Hope you are all ok?

No further news to report from here, just keeping busy &  waiting for the 28th to arrive!

Laine


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## alex28

Good luck for tomorrow Kelli!


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## gillywilly

Good luck from me to cant wait to hear.
Gill


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## naoise

Hi girls,

Well I have survived my first day of the prep course, we really enjoyed it. 
First it didn't start off very well as we got lost and were late .
But thank goodness that was the only bad thing. We had a few icebreakers to start us off. And after that we made friends with other couples, one couple had 4 kids of their own and wanted to adopt two children that they are fostering.  Then we went on to the reasons why children are in care and the meaning of attachment. Then a woman who has adopted a little girl came in and we got to ask her lots of questions.
So all in all it was a really enjoyable experience and we are really looking forward to next week. It really was not worth my sleepless night tossing and turning.

It was also good to meet other people in our situation, and to know we are not on our own.

LOL Keli


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## Mummyof2

Keli - good to hear that you enjoyed your prep course first day.  

Laine - the sw came for 2 hours yesterday evening for a 1-2-1 with my dh.  Ds and I had to go upstairs out of the way.  I have managed to do my homework but it took me about 10 hours!!  I had to list all the addresses I have ever lived at (16) and do all the jobs I have had (12) with a brief description, all the schools I have attended (many as father was in forces) and all the qualifications I have obtained and the year.  I had to describe my early life and write in depth all about myself, my parents and siblings.  Won't go into more details here but it took forever but finally done - phew.  Living room finally finished and back looking nice.  Sw seems very pleasant and is a cat lover which is good as I have 3!

All the best to everyone

Jenny


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## LB

Keli - so pleased you enjoyed your first day - good luck with the rest of the course.

We met up with some friends last night who have been matched with two little ones - their excitment was lovely so see and also great to share.

good luck everyone
LB
X


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## alex28

Keli -great news glad you enjoyed it!  Just over a week to go till ours!!!

Jennifer - blimey!!! We had to complete the addresses where we have lived before our interview last week so not looking fwf to the jobs side!  Your brain gets all frazzled by the time you get to my age


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## keemjay

keli - lovely to hear how you got on  really glad you found it all positive. i cant wait till we are at that stage, i'm feeling so impatient just now. i know the dates now for the new year courses (even tho we arent definitley on them) they are late feb and march which feels such a loooong way away...

welcome emcom - did  at your sun dropping you in it!

ever - i think jennifer is right - sounds like night terrors to me too, has she had any more?

we are counting down to sw visit on tues, been making the house a bit tidier ahead of time as we are away this weekend and i'm at work all day mon...
had a nice email from the local Adoptuion UK support group inviting us to join. theire next meeting is tues eve - not sure if we will make it as what with getting pup on thurs, being away, tues mornings visit and an IUI meet at the weekend, i'm feeling the week is stacked enough! perhaps we'll make the next one - its nice to feel included tho....

have good weekends everyone - dh is taking me away for a surprise so no idea where i'm going 

kj x

ps Laine - puppy is a lab/collie cross


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## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Kelli

     

Yay! Glad all went well. Thanks for sharing your day with us.

We only have 1 day left as ours starts saturday  

Hi to everyone else

H x


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## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Kj

Sorry our posts crossed. Good luck with your meeting next week, I spent ages tidying up and our Sw said she wasn't bothered whether we were tidy or not!

Oooooh how exciting a weekend away. Enjoy  

H x


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## Barbarella

Very very disappointed today.  Our SW called in sick and the first meeting of our home study was cancelled.  How typical is it, that we wanted to put it on hold for a month because it was going too quickly, and now we're the ones being held up.  I am concerned because we really wanted to work with this SW and she was on long term sick leave a while back, which meant catching up on her workload and us having to wait for her to catch up.  Now she has, she's gone off sick again.  

Any suggestions!?  Should we see how it goes, or take this as a sign of things to come and ask for a change of SW before we start.  Such a shame as we really clicked with her.. but there's no point in hanging about if she's going to be off sick all the time.

Sorry haven't had time to read all of the thread, but just caught Keli's prep course details... brings back memories of ours.. really glad you enjoyed it.   And Jenny... all that homework... OMG!!!  Can't wait...lol !!!

Love and luck to all..
Cxx


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## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi Barbarella

Really sorry to hear your visit was cancelled, I would also be very disappointed.  

I would perhaps wait a while, did they indicate whether it was a long term problem?

Hope you get a new date booked soon.

Best wishes
H x


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## Mummyof2

Barbarella - I would ask how long the sw is going to be off.  If it is an ongoing problem I would ask to be moved to another sw.  This adoption takes long enough without being held up with sw being off sick.  I really liked the first sw who came to do our home visit and was disappointed that we didn't get her for our home study but this second sw is just as nice.  Hopefully you will find the same if you swap sw.

Waiting to be a mum - good luck with your prep course tomorrow.

Hi to everyone else.

Jenny


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## gillywilly

Hi all
Keli - glad the first day went well I guess no matter how hard we all try it will be a sleepless night !!! Trying not to think about mine (21st nOVEMBER)

Barbarella - sorry about sw its horrible you build yourself up and then bang hope you get it sorted. I would agree with Jennifer but then the department could be short staffed.

Waiting to be a mum - my thoughts will be with you tomorrow let us know.

To everyone else hi!!!!!!!
Here we have homework this weekend writing on childhoods!!! Being a teacher I am rushing around doing school work this afternoon to try and free up my weekend.

Love Gill


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## cindyp

Hi Girls

Just a quick post, we're going to my parents this weekend and I need to pack.  I was supposed to have gone in October for Mum's birthday but being poorly delayed everything.

Jenny, know what you mean about the homework, it feels weird doesn't it writing down all that stuff.  I remember doing the excercise about writing down what your other half is like and what you like about them and it seemed strange trying to put it into words.  It's nice to hear your SW seems pleasant, I must admit I wasn't sure about ours at the beginning but as the process went on we got on really well.  I think it was some of the questions that she had to ask that put me off her but I later realised she was only doing her job.  

Keli, glad you enjoyed the start of the prep course, hope the rest continued to go as well.  

Barbarella, sorry to hear about your SW, I think Jennifer is right and you should find out if it's likely to be long term and if you need to be assigned another SW.  Hope things work out.

KJ, the house tidy thing, don't bother as you'll have so many visits it's not worth the effort.  Also they come to check in on you and your adopted children and we all know it's virtually impossible to keep a house tidy with young children (or is that just me??   ).  Hope the meet goes well.

Alex, I'm in my 40's and my brain has been frazzled by too much alcohol in my 30's, what happened to yours??    Like you say not long until your course.

H, hope things go well tomorrow.

Hi to everyone else, I know I've not caught up with everyone.

We think our DS is coming down with another cold which explains the last 3 sleepless nights.  I must admit I love him to death but there are times when I look back fondly to my life before, restaurant meals, lying in bed past 7 in the morning, all the things you take for granted when you haven't got kids.  On the whole DH and I have decided that life is definitely better as parents but when our DS was bouncing on our bed at 6.30 this morning having already woken up at 11 and 4 during the night he said to me "We're almost 43 and you want another one of these?"  However as I said to him "might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb, I can't get any more tired" (please can the people on the thread who already have more than one child confirm that this will be the case  ).  So next year after we get the new house sorted out (assuming we do actually move as we are still waiting on our buyers to get their acts together!)  I might be starting out again, assuming that moving house with a 2 year old hasn't already killed me off.

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

love
Cindy

PS, how do people feel about the possibility of having a get together in the New Year?


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Keli - Nice to hear about the Prep Course, glad you enjoyed it.

H - Good luck tomorrow, will be thinking of you & look forward to hearing all about it.

Jenny - Look forward to doing that part of the HS!

Barbarella - Hope you get something sorted with your sw.

Hi to everyone else.

Laine x


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## Ann

I Just wanted to pop on and say hello to everyone - I do read but I have had no chance to post in the past few weeks!!! Our house has been a house of illness for the past 7 weeks and I am well and truly fed up with the doctors surgery and antibiotics - our eldest has had 4 lots and our youngest 3 I think they are just passing infections back and forth   and to top it all off my Dh has been off for a week and has been signed off for another with bacterial conjunctivitis and a chest infection - I feel like we should have a red cross on the door!!!! and I should wear a nurses outfit ( my Dh likes that idea  )  Cindy despite the illnesses 2 is FAB and I would not swap them for the world it was only today that we both commented that despite the early mornings, broken sleep. no social life and a trashed house     we would not swap it for our former life, they both light up our world and make it for us.  Especially now that they are playing/fighting together it is wonderful xxx  Would love a meet up in the new year - let's get the ball rolling.
We are helping friends tomorrow who are adopting 3 sisters next week - it is great to see them and to think that a year a go we were going thru the same emotions - I also cant help thinking how there life is about to change in the biggest possible way.
Hope you all have a fantastic weekend

lotsa love Ann xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## carol ann

Good Afternoon to you all,  

We have just had our 7th failed IVF and are now considering adoption. We are very nervous about the process. A couple of years ago we had a meeting with our local adoption agency and even the first informal chat was hard work. Am i correct in thinking that we will have to wait one year after our last IVF before we can start the adoption process?
This board looks full of excellent information and think i will need to spend Sunday having a good read through the posts.
I look forward to chatting to you all
Have a great Saturday ladies.

Carol


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## superal

Hi Carol Ann

It depends on which LA or SS you go with, some like you to have finished treatment at least a year ago, some say 6 months.

Why not ring a few and ask for information & a general chit chat.

Sorry to hear IVF has failed for you again and hope your dreams of becoming a family come true down this route.

Good Luck


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Well our journey has well and truly started!

Had a great first day, funny feeling nerves and excitement all rolled into one  

It was a full on day.... 

We talked about how children's heritage is important including culture and identity.
We had quite a long discussion about a new part of the assessment process which involves evidencing "competencies". This is part of the new legislation coming out the end of this year. Basically you cannot say you have done something you have to evidence it. For example if you are involved with children in any way you can ask the parents of the the children to make a statement to evidence that you have the competency required. Sorry if this doesn't make sense. Sounds harder than it is, I hope!

We looked at contact with birth family after adoption and saw a video of young adopted adults tracing their birth families.

Really pleased to get the first one over. There was only 2 couples there that didn't have children all the others already had birth children.  

Hi to everyone, good luck to all  

H x


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Forgot to say my CRB check came back in the post today 

Only took 2 weeks   Wonder how long we will have to wait for DH's


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## naoise

Hi Waiting to be a mum.

I'm soo glad to hear your prep course went well  . When do you go back? I haven't heard about the new legislation but Northern Ireland always seems to be far behind everyone else.
We haven't even started our checks yet. But I don't think they take as long here, famous last words.

LOL Keli

All the best for the next meeting


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## Mummyof2

Hi waiting to be a mum, glad to hear that your prep course went well.  We are struggling with our competencies at the moment so it would be good if you could IM me with any relevant info you feel I should know about them.  We were told about them on our prep course but that was back in March and we have forgotten how to do them now    Our sw is going to go through it with us on Wednesday as I haven't a clue  .  On our prep course, we (and one other couple) were the only ones with birth children so it obviously varies.  

All the best

Jenny


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## Mummytoone

Hello

Just had to pop on to tell you all the funniest story ever that happened to us this afternoon......

Went over the park at about 4.30pm with Adam and Harry (dog) it was almost dark, well dusk I suppose. When we got to the park in the distance we could see a middle aged lady (about 45 ish) with 2 great danes. They were galloping about like a couple of ponies. As we got nearer Harry got a bit nervous of them but we stopped and patted the dogs and chatted to the lady for a minute or two. Amongst the convo I said to her, 'crikey have they ever knocked you over?' to which the lady replied ' no, the thing to do is just to stand still and they will know where you are and wont knock you over'. Well at this point her two dogs who had been galloping around us whilst we were chatting ran at me full pelt and just pummeled me into the ground. I landed on my **** and ended up on my back. The lady was terribly apologetic and reached down to offer me her hand to pull me up ( Adam was just standing there a gasp I might add...) well as I was half way up would you believe it but the dogs litterally ran again, full pelt at the woman and she crashed to the ground on top of me!!!!!! There we were just lying there legs akimbo!!! At this point Adam was just laughing hysterically not knowing what to do. The lady had actually gone down really hard on top of me and I felt the thud as she landed. Anyway...... we sort of dusted ourselves off a bit. The lady was so worried about me as I had gone down so hard too. The dogs were still galloping around...

Well whilst this had all been going on Harry had just been standing there about 2 ft away from us just watching it all. As we were saying goodbye to the lady, who I might add was heavily apologising and checking I was OK. We all looked down at Harry on the floor who was just quietly smiling and cocking his leg up the lady's wellie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It as as though he felt so intimidated and cross that his beloved Mummy had been knocked down by the unruly dogs, he just wanted to have the last word.          

I feel like I have whiplash and have a very bruised behind, other than that I am fine    

Just thought it would make you chuckle

Love Lou xxxx


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## Pilchardcat

Lol Lou    poor you really, hope your ok xxx  was a funny story though   Nice one Harry, that's one up for the doggie world  !

Love Amanda xxx


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## Nats

Hi ladies...

It's been so long since i last got the chance to log on and catch up, that I feel a bit out of the loop!...

Nothing new here, but we didnt expect much before Xmas anyway....once thats out the way it will soon be a year since we hit panel. We did have a letter from the medical examiner to say they would be writing to our gps for a foolow up as its been 2 years since our medicals!. I wouldnt mind but in the past 3 months I have been diagnosed with a skin problem, nothing major and just means antibiotics everyday.....and in reality we knew I had it, its just that its taken the hospital 8 years to give me a diagnosis...and I have also been having physio as it seems my trapped nerves has been cause because my pelvis tilts backwards!. Again the physio has been great and I am so much better now!....

One of the couples on our prep group had thier little girl move in with them last week, so we are awaiting an update from them!...its all so exciting!

Will try and catch up and get back on track with everyone soon!

Lou - I did see that you had your first meet this week sometime!, so wishng you all the best for that!

Natsxxx


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## naoise

Hi ladies, 

I just thought that I would pop on and say   I am starting to get excited about Thursday already! How silly am I. We are going to be talking this week about why children are in the system and how to cope. We also have some homework to do. I was just wondering about the F form do you have to do on your own or does the sw help? I am starting to get worried about it already.

Lou I loved your story about your walk in the park   animals do the funniest things sometimes.

LOL Keli


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi girls me again  

Dh's CRB checks came back today, was so worried after Jennifers DH took 15 weeks. Ours has only taken 2 weeks 

Nats, really hoping your special gift is going to be with you really soon, you have been waiting patiently  

Keli, not long till your 2nd day of your prep course, glad you are excited, our next one is this Saturday  

Lou, good luck for Thursday  

Jennifer, would be more than happy to give you any info you need. We have been given alot of handouts,   pm any questions you have. Good luck for Wednesday  

Karen, hope everything is ok with your family. I know you have probably got your hands full  

Good luck to Laine,Alex and Gill if memory serves me right your prep courses are coming up very soon.

Hi to everyone else

H x


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## keemjay

hi all 
well we've had our initial sw visit this morning and it went really well  was much more involved than i thought,took 2 hrs with her writing all the time, more like what i expected when we start the home study - when i mentioned i felt i'd lost some friendships whilst going thru all the txt, she wanted to know all, about it and how thimngs would change when we adopted, also wanted to know in depth our reasons for not telling dh's parents our plans so far (tho he's going to do it later today)...but it was very relaxed and we felt comfortable sharing stuff with her. she is happy that we can go on the prep courses in feb/march so it feels like we are on our way  she had a quick look a round the house so glad we tidied a bit  all in all feel very positive about it all 

good luck Lou for your visit on Thurs  and   at your dog story. hope you're not too bruised...

kj x


----------



## Mummytoone

hey great news and great to read your experience, trying not to think about Thurs too much. Pledge and hoover are going to be on the go all day tomorrow  

L x


----------



## Jo

Just popped in to wish Lou and Adam lots of Luck for Thursday  

Love Jo
x x x


----------



## Mummyof2

Tomorrow will be our 4th home study visit.  Poor dh was up until 1am last night doing his homework and he is only half way through.  Hope all the homework's aren't as lengthy as our first lot.  Going to talk about the competencies tomorrow and see the medical adviser's comments on our medicals we had.

KJ - glad to hear that things went so well.  Caleb looks adorable.

Lou - good luck for Thursday.  I will be hoovering and polishing tomorrow in readiness for our sw visit at 4.30pm.

All the best to you all

Jenny


----------



## kizzie

Hello - very excited to hear about everyones developments!

Just wondered - how long did you have to wait after first contacting an agency before they called to sort out a first visit.

I haven't been waiting long (only a week since they agency said they thought it was a good idea for us to go to next stage) but just wondered how long it might take. I know it wont be long before Im rushing home from work desperately pressing the answer machine in case they've left a message 

Of course I should have asked *them* how long the wait might be at the time but I dont want to ring them back because they might think I'm hassling them.

Kizziex


----------



## LB

Lou    
your story was great and good on Harry for looking after Mummy XX
good luck for Thursday - you will do great i just know it hunny XX

love
LB and Rubesy
X


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Ann - Sorry to hear about the illness in your house recently.  Hope everything goes well for your friends.

CarolAnn -  Welcome to the thread.  Sorry to hear about your failed tx.  Wishing you luck should you decide to go ahead with adoption.

H - Thanks for sharing your Prep course experiences with us.  Glad you are enjoying the course.  As for the competencies, I expect we will find out when we do ours.

Nats - Hope you don't have to wait too much lonbger for matching.

Lou - ROFLMAO at your story!  Good luck for Thursday, can't wait to hear how you get on.

Keli - Let us know how the next step of your Prep Course goes.

KJ - Pleased to hear everything went well with the visit.

Jenny - Enjoy your next HS visit.  Felt for your dh being up late with his homework.

Kizzie - If it were me, I would call them and ask  

Hello to everyone else.

Laine


----------



## Mummytoone

Jo

Thanks hun for popping in on me   Am watching you closely too    

Love Lou xxxx


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello everyone

boy its cold, just a quick one from me as its much more toasty downstairs by the fire 

Im glad you all chuckled about my story, it was so so funny, if only someone had a camera. If you knew Harry you would know what a stubborn little soul he is, him doing what he did is no suprise....... He *always* has to have the last word  He has spent a couple of hours this afternoon just sitting under our apple tree whilst Mr Squirrel sat at the top, both of them just looking at each other. Harry would have stayed there all day if he hadnt been dragged away by me when I had to go back to work. One day he WILL get Mr Squirell.....    well he thinks so anyway. I have told him he is going to have to do a few tricks come Thursday to impress our SW  

No news from here, we bought a new kitchen on Sunday so very excited about that and keep looking at the plans, so nice to at last be able to spend money on the house and not yuk IVF  

Right back to the fire 

Love Lou xxxxx


----------



## Mummyof2

Kizzie - it varies from LA to LA but I seem to remember it was about 2 weeks to our first visit with this LA and about a month from Adoption Open Evening to being contacted by first LA.  We swapped LAs as the first one was very slow and kept making mistakes.

Lou - I thought Harry was your child and thought he was very patient to sit under a tree for hours looking at a squirrel.  Perhaps he will be a naturalist when he grows up I thought, or an artist.  Then realised that Harry is your dog    Our dog, Glynn (border collie), races down our garden barking loudly when he sees a squirrel or magpie on our lawn .  He never catches them though, thankfully, but it makes his day chasing them.  Sometimes the cats have a go at catching a squirrel but they are far more agile than the cats so easily escape.  Good luck for tomorrow.

Laine - thanks for the sympathy vote for dh.  He still hasn't finished so will have to give it in a week late like I have done.  It is just too much work to do in a week, along with your daily life to live.

Hi to everyone else.

Jenny


----------



## Pilchardcat

Dear Lou

Sounds lovely by the fire and new kitchen, lovely 

Just wanted to send extra special love & luck to you & A for tomorrow's visit  You'll be fine and they will love you both  let us know how it goes 

Loads of love
Amanda xxx


----------



## lisaw36

Hi, can I join you.  

We attended our LA information day on Saturday and have now sent off our initial information form and are waiting to be contacted by sw.  All during my IVF tx I followed this board avidly and have loved reading your news.  It is such a positive site.  Now I am very excited to be here myself and glad to be off the rollercoaster of IVF.  

Lisa
xx


----------



## LizzyB

Lou 

Loads of luck for tomorrow!!

Much love, Lizzy xxx


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi all,

lovely to read your funny stories! And that you're all enjoying the prep courses. I did too, and although he was really not looking forward to it, Dh really enjoyed it as well!

Hi Lisa, and you are of course very welcome to join in here. You'll see that lots of people are at the same stage as you here.

The situation with our LA just gets weirder and weirder. You may remember that it took me nagging them for 2 months to send our form F out about a family outside our LA area. And the reason I pushed and pushed was because they kept saying that they had no children suitable for us waiting within the LA. So last week with it being national adoption week they published short details of 9 children they want to find families for, of which 3 fitted in to our criteria (for want of a better word). Having experienced a large degree of incompetence before i thought I'd just check to see if we had been considered for these kids and then discounted. I really wouldn't have minded if this had been the case, just so long as we had at some point been considered. But then I find out that we hadn't even been considered. So, why were they telling us they had no kids for us, when they just hadn't checked?? I guess it explains why they didn't want to send out details outside the area, but does anyone else think this is crazy?

Anyway.....no idea what to do next......DH is getting really p!$$ed off and wants to get involved, but think I will hold him back for a while longer.

better get back to work,
XXRuth


----------



## keemjay

Just wanted to wish Lou and Dh the best of luck for tomorrows visit - sure it will be fine  is the house all sparkly clean  i had to air ours yesterday before sw came cos dh had gone a bit mad with the polish and it stank!!
let us know how it goes 

welcome Lisa 

kj x


----------



## kizzie

Hi - I'm quite new to this board but Ive been following everyones stories so just wanted to say GOOD LUCK Lou.  Looking forwarding to reading all about it!
Kizziex


----------



## Dee

Lou,
Thinking of you ...
Heaps of love and luck for tomorrow
Dee
xxx


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Just wanted to wish Lou lots of special luck for tomorrow.  Will be thinking of you and Adam and look forward to hearing all about it  

Oh and Lisa, welcome to the thread!  Look forward to sharing your journey with you.

Laine


----------



## KarenM

Hi Girls

Well tea on my lap and hopefully two little ones will be sleeping soon.  Its eldests birthday today (3) and she has decided to give up her dummy and give it to the babies.  So we've put one in her treasure box and the other in an envelope which I will post to my MIL!  She's not gone off yet, but keep hearing breathing slowing and yawning on the monitor (have to make sure she goes - don't normally have it on now).  We've been wanting to do it for ages but have decided to do it on her terms.

Lou - good luck for the visit tomorrow.  I was PMP about your story with Harry.

Ruth - can't believe your LA.  I have the same trouble keeping my dh calm, I call him Watchdog as he wants to report everyone and everything!

Lisa - welcome I am sure you will find this board a useful source of information.

Keli - don't worry about the form F you will do it in chunks as part of your home study and your SW will talk you through exactly what you need to do.

H (waiting2Bmum) - Glad you've got the CRB check back so quick and you can move on.

KJ - Glad to hear your visit went well

Kizzie - we heard within 2 weeks that we were being progressed.  Although she did tell us unofficially on the day.

Jenny - your going great guns now.  I've applied for a job with SS with our LA!!

Ann - sorry to hear about all the illness in your house, hope everyone's on the mend.

Carol Ann - welcome.  Each LA vary in the time they expect you to wait.  In the main it is 6 months to 1 year.

Nats - really hope the new year brings you all you desire.  How did the bonfire night camping go?

Barbarella - we had this issue with the first SW they allocated to us.  In the end we gave them a few weeks to see if he would come back and make the revised appointment and when it didn't happen, as they had delayed us previously, we insisted things moved on.  We had also set ourselves a definite end date by which we wanted to be parents (so we could draw a line somewhere) and so the more time they wasted the less likely we were to hit our target.

Gill - hope you got on ok with your homework

Cindy - Sorry to hear the cold monster is back again.  Two are great fun especially as Ann says now they are squabbling and fighting!!  Seriously it is great, the love they have for one another is just so consuming and when they do imaginary play together I find it so hard not to laugh as they are so comical.  Would be great to meet up again but would have to be a weekend now I'm back at work full time.

Laine - not long until your prep course.

Well that's as much as I can remember.  Things really busy here.  Dad has his date for his op but it means he is in for Xmas so the big debate is what I do for my mum and brother (whatever it will not be right!).  Work is manic, my assistant is on long term sick and its budget time so the bun fight has started!  I get little time to do anything now and glad that I'm not having to have a presentable house for SW visits, can't believe what a pigsty it is (friends say how tiday it is but its a mess to me)!!

Right off to catch up elsewhere.
Karen x


----------



## molly2003

hello!! girls guys and dolls. well called   the family p-worker today and we have been put forward well our papers to see if it fits to this baby .. a little baby    girl. but there are 2 other couples have as well as us. as it in the best intrest of the child. but at last were not at the botton pile, I'm just not getting our hopes up just yet. but there is a little chance of hope.
well the night are for sure dark now and really getting cold out there. and i can just not get in the mood for Christmas , we was really hoping we would get a placement before Xmas, but it looking more like next year now.well the Disney stuff we got of our honeymoon will have to stay put for the time.
were just really ready for this adoption , but its just not coming any faster. did any of you girl feel like this ?
hope you are all well love xxx


----------



## Mummytoone

aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....................................

back later


----------



## Mummytoone

ps, just quickly fab news Molly


----------



## Mummyof2

Lou - good luck for today.

Molly - fingers crossed that you are considered the right ones for the baby girl.  How lovely if it is you.

Karen - good luck with the job at ss at our LA.  They seem a nice professional bunch.  We are very happy we switched.  Crb delayed us a lot but it will be worth it in the end.  Sorry to hear that your dad will be in hospital over Christmas, won't be a happy time with him not there.  Happy birthday to your eldest - kiss her from me.  Never had to face the dummy issue as ds just kept spitting his out when he got to 3 months old.  We said we would never give him a dummy but he cried so much that in the end we gave him one to keep him quiet  

Ruth - I would ask to speak to the sw manager and ask why you weren't considered and make a fuss.  It is terrible how you are being treated.

Hi to everyone else.

J


----------



## Nats

God this thread is starting to move fast!!.. and with some new ladies too!!

Lisa- welcome to the thread!, im sure you will have and get all the information you need whilst going through adoption! and its lovely as we are all at different stages!...good luck..

Ruth - One of our friends who was on the same prep group and have keot in contact with are having similar problems. There was also an article in a newspaper from the nxt county (we are on the borders) pleading for parents to come forward...so she did and when she called they just said, send us your details and we will take a look. They are very frustrated at the moment, especially as they were told the age groups they have gone for..generally have alot of children waiting. Sometimes all we need is an explanation as to why.....I wish you luck anyway!

Molly - Hope yopu get some wonderful news soon....it would be a great Xmas present being told that wouldnt it! Fingers crossed..

Jenny - Hope the homework slows down, they seem to hit us hard for the first 3 visits and then nothing...that was it...hope this is the case for you too!. It was odd getting homework especially when I never used to do much of it at school!

Karen - How sweet that she gave her dummy up. Im sure she has a fab birthday and got lots of nice presents too!
Didnt manage to get get the camping as my dog pulled a cruciate ligament and could hardly walk the day before and it wasnt fair that I left him when he wasnt well.....the vet put him on painkillers and rest..so we spent most of the time helpoing him get round!....we have just purchased a caravan though, so will make the most of a full year next year without the worry of freezing our fingers off!!   Im so excited about going away in it!..

Hope you are all well....take care

Natsxxx


----------



## superal

Hi Everyone, I've got to agree with Nat's that this thread is moving fast and its hard keeping up with every one.

Molly - heres hoping and praying that you are matched to this little baby girl, when will you know?

Nat's - sorry you haven't heard anything yet, it will happen and the right child/ren will be out there for you some where, don't give up.  We purchased ourselves a 10 man tent at the end of August, there is only 4 of us & 2 dogs but I like my space, I'm looking forward to using it next year, I'll be the one who be freezing then!

Karen - excellent news about the dummy, I was really lucky as our DD gave hers up when she was 13 months old, it was getting her off the bottle at night time we struggled with.

Hope everyone else is OK, will try and catch up with all your news later today, I've got to go now and put away all the presents that I've just bought with DH money for our DD for Christmas, boy I had a fab time spending!!! 

All she wanted this year for Crhistmas was Baby Annabell but we were struggling to buy it, as soon as it comes in the shops in goes, so yesterday I spotted Baby Millie, ELC do this doll, at the moment she is £30 but comes with £25 worth of free accessories so I think it's a bargain, DH thinks its day light robbery for a doll, MEN!!

I told DD that one of Father Christmas helpers had stopped me in town & said Father Christmas knows she has been very good & is working hard at school & wondered if she would like Baby Millie rather than Baby Annabell, as lots of little girls wanted baby Annabell & he was looking for some one very special to give Baby Millie to, DD squealed with delight & said I want Baby Millie.

So Baby Millie is now waiting to be wrapped up & sent to Father Christmas, Job done!

It will soon be all you new approved Mums and waiting to be approved Mums doing daft things like this next year! 

TFN
Love
Andrea
xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello

SW been and gone, stayed 1.5 hours and we covered a lot of stuff. I think my hackles went up a bit to start with as she went on and on and on about IVF and why we weren't doing any more when I was young etc etc........... I think they are going to insist we have some counselling some way along the line. Anyone else had that?? On the whole the lady was nice though. We spoke about everything including the dog and the cat and where they slept, didn't tell her on my bed! Just said upstairs she went on about how some people have to re home their dogs ( I DONT THINK SO   ) . Anyway at the end we spoke about ages and she said that we were the youngest couple that had applied (surprised me) and we would stand in good stead for 1 child age 0-2 which was very encouraging. She said there is a huge drugs problem long the coast where we live, one town in particular which I wont mention, that they are obtaining more children from, shocking isn't it!

So now just a waiting game for the prep course dates and we go from there........

Gotta go to work now, thanks for all the good lucks!

Love Lou xxxix


----------



## Pilchardcat

Lou, fantastic news, well done hun !  Back later

Loads of love to you
Amanda xxx


----------



## Hun

Well done Lou!! 

Hun xx


----------



## superal

Hi Lou

Another step closer, don't worry about your pets, we had 2 Labradors before we got either of our children, they were our fur babies & no way on this earth would we have got rid of them! (we still have them, a bit older now but just as friendly!)

Our DS foster mum said he wouldn't like them................HA  she was wrong our son loved them & they loved him back, he used to roll on the floor with them & loved taking them for walks, how things have changed! 

We were also a young couple when we adopted, our DS moved in the day before my 30th birthday, I couldn't have wished for a better 30th birthday present.

I wish you lots of luck for your journey & hope all your dreams come true, ours did.

Love
Andrea
xx


----------



## Jo

LOu
Well done, soon be on to the next stage  

Love Jo
x x x


----------



## kizzie

Hi Lou - fantastic news about the visit.  It sounds like it went really well and they are really keen on you as prospective parents! 
Kizziex


----------



## keemjay

Lou - glad todays visit went well   about the txt thing - dh and i thought that we would be questioned about giving up txt - we only went as far as IUI's and didnt want to do IVF - it has been touched upon and I'm sure it will come up again in the home study. to ensure we were both ready to move on (and also to demonstrate to sw's that we were addressing the loss involved in giving up on biological children) we recently had some independant counselling. we just went twice and i am planning to go again on my own - it was very helpful for us to lay everything on the table and check neither of us were holding back on stuff. happily we discovered we are both feeling all the same things, arent looking back, only forwards, and whilst we still feel pain that we have had to move on from ttc, we are fully ready for the adoption process. both sw's we have spoken with so far seemed to think that we had done the right thing and were impressed we had done it off our own backs. they arent expecting that we wont have emotions to do with leaving txt behind, what they want to hear is that we arent bottling stuff up and pretending everythings fine and dandy....

superal - sounds like you managed the baby annabel/millie crisis like a pro! personally feel baby annabel is overrated anyway, and her crying drives me INSANE  

Karen - good news on the dummy  hope she slept ok  bless her sending it to the babies 

kj x


----------



## naoise

Hello ladies,

Lou well done on your first visit 

Superal I loved your Baby Millie story, when my niece was staying with us a couple of months ago I bought her one and she loved it.

Well we had day 2 of our prep course and it was heavy going, we talked about all types of abuse, emotional, neglect and sexual, it was very informative. We also did some thought provoking exercises. So we have to go back on Tuesday and that is it I can't believe that it is nearly over. I don't really know what happens next home study I think but I'm sure we will find out next week.
I fought my shyness and joined in the discussions more this week than I did last week. 

Good luck to everybody whatever you are up to.

LOL Keli


----------



## everhopeful

Hi

Just a quick update from me. We've had confirmation today that our adoption hearing will be held on 19th December! What a special Christmas treat!  
On the down side, we'd heard all these lovely stories including from my home town, about families being made a real fuss of and the adoption being a real occasion. And we were really looking forward to our big day. Then we found out that ours will be held in the judges chamber and not the court room. Which means a quick in and out, just us and sw, no families or friends, no flowers and photos, no ceremony. Gutted.  
Today our sw said that after having a word with the court, they'd agreed that we could take 4 people max with us if we wanted - ie. our parents. Which would normally be great. Only my Dad won't be upto it and I'd rather no-one came if my Mum and Dad can't both be there. Daren't tell MIL about this turnaround because she'll book the day off work to be there. I feel like our big day has been snatched away. We want to make it an occasion and if our parents could be there with us and go out for meal, that'd be enough for me. But there's this big black cloud over us and I just feel that I need to postpone any celebrations until so many weeks down the line.  

Think it'll be a quick stamp of the papers and out into the street again. 
It's a massive thing for us, and I feel the nearest to having a christening or something. Although we'd have like to have had DD christened, she's already been when she was a little baby and so we can't.
I'm not sure if a naming ceremony would be appropriate although I would like something like that. A day that's just for her, officially being welcomed into the family, now that it'll be legal. Haven't looked into, not sure where we could have a ceremony. Is it just church? 

Sorry I know I'm rambling! I'll go and sort myself out!
This was supposed to be a good news post! Never mind, must try harder next time!

Hi to everyone!


----------



## keemjay

aww ever, how disappointing for you  i hope you can think of some nice way to celebrate - my friends had a naming ceremony at her parents house - it was summer so in the garden - she had a good friend do the 'reading' stuff and used a humanist ceremony booklet as a guideline. it was really lovely and she and her dh wrote some things too, it was very personal. will see if i can find a link to where she got it from....

kj x


----------



## Boomerang girl

oh ever I'm so sorry thats really disappointing, it's natural we want some special landmarks the same way people have them with "born to" children. I guess I was hoping we could hve our childrenchristened too when we get them- choosing the god-parents is a big deal for us.

I guess one way to look at it is that people who get married in a big church and those who get married in a registry office all remember their day as just as special- so hopefully your day will still be really special too. mybe you can choose outfits together, or go for a photo sitting that afternoon- something to keep forever from your special day. what about inviting the people you would have chosen as God-parents, and making them "guardians" instead- it would be a really special day for them then too.


----------



## kizzie

What about throwing a special 'thanksgiving' party for your daughter.

My friend did something similar when her daughter who had been very ill was given the all clear.  It was really a celebration of having her two children and it was a wonderful occassion.  A bit like a christening really with all friends and family getting together.

Congrats on your good news   

Kizziex


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi

Ever, congrats on getting your date, a fab xmas pressie. Iam sure you will make it a memorable day. Hugs  :-

Lou, sounds great....... Did your SW indicate how long you might have to wait for your prep course. Hope it's not long.  

Kelli, wow prep course nearly over. Good luck with the next step  

Karen, Bless your 3 year old. Hope she got to sleep ok. Hope works calms down soon  

No news here, Saturday seems to be coming round quick   Will be half way after Saturday. Not expecting to start our home study untill after Christmas.

 Hi to everyone else

Lol
H x


----------



## Sue MJ

Hi Girls,

Just popped in to say well done to Lou for jumping the first hurdle with the SW. Hope your prep course comes through soon and you can move onto the next stage.  Sounds very encouraging about qualifying for the 0-2 age range!

Good Luck to you and all your fellow mates here.

Love,

Sue xxx


----------



## KarenM

Ever

We had exactly the same. Rich's dad had had his hip op the day before and my dad was on his quarantine period following his chemo. We only found out on the Weds and the hearing was the Friday that we could have had as many people as we wanted to but the timing was all wrong and like you felt that if Mom's and Dad's couldn't be there then no one else was going to be.

We had a lovely day though and plan to do something with the family in the new year. In the end we had the hearing and then invited the Sw's back to ours for cake and champagne and then we met our closest friends for a meal down the pub.

If you contact your local registry office they can advise you on naming ceremonies. I think there was a thread on the babydust section....

Here it is... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,35355.0.html

Hope you have a lovely day and like youb say what a lovely Christmas present.

Karen x


----------



## KarenM

Lou

Great news.  Don't worry about the dog we had the same sort of conversation at one stage.  You might be asked for your Form F what you would do if things didn't work out between children and pets.  Glad that things are moving on for you.

Karen x


----------



## superal

Hi Ever

Exactly the same happened when we went to court to adopt our son, the judge was really miserable about having photo's taken & said no!

He did make us feel at home though & laughed & joked with us & made our son feel special, which was the most important thing.

Once every thing was done & dusted we asked the court usher if we could go back in & take a photo of our son sat on the judges chair for his keep safe box, he told us were not supposed to do so BUT he let us & took some photos for us so we could be on the same photo's.

It was a different ball game when we adopted DD, the judge was brilliant, gave us photos of the special day, gave our DD & DS a little present each.  Looking back I'm glad we sneaked back in to take photos for our son & like Karen is planning we had a bit of a do for our son when we got home.

Just enjoy the day, you've waited so long to get to this part & just think no more SS popping up & right before Christmas, what a fantastic present!! 

Love Andrea
xx


----------



## Nats

Lou - great news on your first meeting. We had a comment at panel about our dog, but it was because he sleeps on our bed with us!...anyway hoping that you sail through the next stage!

Ever - What an extra special Xmas you will have...wishing you all the best!..

Kelli - great news on finsihing the prep groups, you will there before you know it!.

Superal - Im sure we will hear soon enough, we have settled down and it gets to the stage where you dont think about the possible phone call. We have had such a busy year and have so much planned that we are hoping to be taken by suprise. In the meantime we are slowly ticking off some boxes from our "never done before, must do now" list and its fun!

Sorry no more personals!

Natsxx


----------



## lisaw36

Just a quick post to say thanks for the welcome from you all  

I will probably not post until I have some news but will keep reading about all your steps forward and, of course, learning all the time about this whole process.        I particularly love the little stories about those of you who have achieved our aim and the joy the little ones have brought you.  Aaaaaaaah!    

Lisa
x


----------



## Pilchardcat

Lou, how you feeling today ?? Bet your head you buzzing yesterday and last night   Hope the next stage comes through for you very very soon, how wonderful to potentially be put into category for baby/toddler, it's no less then you both deserve, so pleased for you both, loads of love, Amanda xxx


----------



## Jennifer

Hello - Just popped in to see how Lou got on yesterday   Great that you had a good meeting with SW - I hope things move along swiftly for you   
Lots of Love
Jennifer xx xx

ps - Hi to everyone else, I love catching up on the news on this thread


----------



## Dee

Just popping by to say ....
Well done, Lou!

Sounds like your first SW visit went really really well ... and great news about the potential matches for the future.

Roll on your next hurdle ... you're going to fly over that one too and will be a Mummy soon.

Love
Dee
xxx


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Lou - So pleased to hear your visit went well yesterday.  Hopefully, you will hear soon about the Prep Course.  

H - Not long until Saturday    Will be thinking of you and waiting to hear how you get on.

Keli - Thanks for sharing your news on the Prep Course, really useful.

Nats - Really hope you hear soon.

Ever - Fab news on the court date.  A wonderful Christmas pressie.

Molly - Good luck with the matching.  

Hi to everyone else.  Hope you are all ok?

Laine


----------



## Donna Taylor

Hello,

I haven't read through old posts yet but I hope I will soon get to know you all, I think I may know some of you from the IUI thread?

so far we have recieved an info pack and are attending an intial meeting on the 7th Decmaner which I am really looking forward to.
We hope to adopt a baby, which I know is very rare

Look forward to getting to know you all

Donna xx


----------



## alex28

Hi Donna and welcome.

Im sorry you have had to make the decision to try an alternative method of being a mum but believe me from reading all these stories you will feel such excitement at the prospect of it all.  Good luck for the info meeting, we watched a video and talked about ourselves with lots of other couples.  5 weeks later we got an interview and here we are 3 weeks later starting our prep course on monday!!!

Gill - hope next week goes well for you too - will pm you from other site to "chat" after it finishes.

Laine - good luck for your prep course too the week after - lots of us "prepers" at the moment - so exciting!!!!

Lou  - glad the visit went well and hopefully not too long till you get your course dates thru.

Keli - was great to hear about your prep course too - have they said when you will be allocated a SW?

Have a nice weekend everyone and lets hope we all get our dream soon. xxx


----------



## LB

Great news Lou - a massive step forward.

don't worry about the pet issue - the panel asked us about Ruby but everything was fine

good luck hunny  - and roll on the prep course!

LB
X


----------



## magenta

Hi everyone!

Gosh what a lot of news!!

Lou - what a big step forward
keli - i think we're about at the same stage now
Ever - great news about the court date


I have been unwell the last two weeks but feeling much better now.  Once I was up and able I managed to use the time quite well and read some of my BAAF books and surf the Adoption UK site for info. We have eventually been allocated a social worker and we start homestudy on tuesday. 

I was trying to explain to a friend why being allocated a sw was a big deal but I suppose unless you are applying for adoption it doesn't seem a big deal.  I told her it was a bit like getting your fist appointment for a hospital consultant...she seemed to understand a bit better.  is that how you would explain it?

Well...weight loss is going great guns...thanks to the Xenical and a major kidney infection that meant i didn't eat for a week!  Almost a whole stone down so far...only 4 stone to go (ha ha).  Actually I think I will be ok if I lose another 3 but 4 is the goal. Never going to be a slim jim but aiming to be a yummy mummy this time next year (whether or not we have been approved or matched by then).  New GP has recommended I try a low GI diet - apparently it is really good for women with PCOS so going to try low fat and low GI for the next month and aim to lose another half stone for new year.

Anyway...better go.  i am on a pre- homevisit cleaning spree.
please tell me I won't feel so guilty abot mess/dust before every homestudy visit

magenta x


----------



## Mummyof2

Magenta - well done on that weight loss.  I need to lose 4 stone as well but have managed to lose 7lbs so far in 5 weeks.  Aiming to lose the weight by February/March when we go to panel.  Don't know how I would define being allocated a sw for home study to someone who wasn't going through adoption - like going to the family planning clinic to come off the pill perhaps    Well the end result is going to be a child hopefully    My friends/family try to be supportive but haven't a clue really about what we are going through    I've given up trying to explain.  We are going to have our 4th homestudy visit on Wednesday.  Been ok so far.  First one was a 1-2-1 chat for 1.5 hrs about early life/schooling etc.  Second was same chat but with dh (took 2 hrs).  Third was about our relationship and how we met and about my other long term relationship briefly (took 1.5 hours).  Turns out if you have had other relationships that went on for longer than 2 years sw are supposed to contact exs to get their point of view on your personality and suitability for adopting!  Not spoken to my ex for 10 years and don't know where he is living now so just told sw that.  The homework takes a long time to complete.

All the best to you all

Jenny


----------



## Boomerang girl

getting a bit nervous about panel now...
what will they ask? what should I wear? I haven't lost any sleep over it but I am sure I will this week.

did anyone else do something to celebrate after panel (hoping of course that it goes well!).

only 5 sleeps to go....


----------



## LB

Hi Bommerang girl you will be fine. 

i wore a pair of black trousers and a suede dressyish jacket and i felt fine.
not sure what they will ask but i am sure there will be no surprises!

we had taken the full day off and went out for lunch afterwards which was nice


anyway enjoy the day - lots of luck you will be fine

LB
X


----------



## TraceyH

Boomerang girl.

I feel the same as you.  We are going to Panel on Wednesday.  I haven't got a clue what to wear, I thought I would go smart/casual.  My sister is coming round on Monday to sort me out and I have booked a hair appointment on Tuesday to take my mind of it and have a bit of a pamper.  To top it all, my period is due on Tuesday so I will have to try and not be too hormonal (I do feel rough) and I have also had an outbreak of spots - great!

Apparently we will get a heads up of the questions they are going to ask us just prior to us going into the Panel which we can discuss with our FPO.  A couple of friends passed Panel in this area in September and have said that they are keen on the contraception issue.  We have been trying to get pregnant for years before this, so it would be a complete miracle if it happened now, but we have an answer just in case.

We are hoping to have a celebratory lunch, but I don't want to tempt fate.  We have both got the whole day off.  Couldn't bear going back to work if it all went wrong.

Magenta - Well done on your weight loss.  I have lost 3 1/2 stone in the last year (Weight Watchers) so I am looking forward to them asking me about the weight issue as I have worked hard at it.  Thankfully I am quite tall and don't look as heavy as I am.

Good luck to everyone else.

Tracey


----------



## Donna Taylor

Hello,

How exciting all these people going to pannel. I am along way of that yet.

A lot of people we have told have said 'oh its a shame you are having to look into it but its a good thing' I don't see it as a shame I see it as a posisitive step forward! maybe because I still may be able to have my own biological children later on.

We told our paretns today and while they didn't say much the were supportive, for some reason I was very nerveous about telling them.

Although I am excitied about the whole process I am very very scared to as it sounds like they really intergate you and DH

Cant wait to learn more

Donna xx


----------



## alex28

Donna - hope i did not upset you by my choice of words, it was well meaning as i know how much you have been through over the summer and iwas sorry that things had not worked out for you.  You are right thought its very exciting to be moving forward and like you say you never know what may happen in the future.

Well off for good night sleep now, prep course on Monday - YIKES!!


----------



## Boomerang girl

hiya,
really starting to feel nervous now!
tracey i think i am going smart casual too.  DH said he's wearing a suit.

I do hope they tell us the questions before we go in! SW hasn't told us to do our life story book- I don't think they do that at panel in kent.


I wish I could take a day off. I teach and they are pretty tight on us taking any time off, so I am going in until 10.30 (panel pptis at 11.10) then rushing home, going to panel and back to work for 1.30! dh is going to play golf in the afternoon- he has booked a days leave. my two hours off will probably be unpaid. I am lucky I work 15 mins drive from where I live, and the county chambers (where panel is) are five mins walk away from my house!  

We might get time to go for a bite to eat, and if all goes horribly wrong I'm buggered if i will go back to work then!  all going well we will go for a meal on thurs night.

how on earth am I going to sleep between now and then?

donna we didn't find the home study too much of an intrusion at all- we were more than forthcoming ourselves about our lives so sw didn't have to "dig" nything out of us.  I agree with you- this isn't second best for us we chose to adopt rather than continuing with tx.

as for getting asked about contraception t panel- that would be a laugh dh has azoospermia! still, funnily enough I am having such a rough time with period pain I am going to see the gp once we have been to panel so I can go back on the pill. we have already discussed it but I felt I needed to have panel approval before I take that step.

alex- good luck with the prep course ours was really enjoyable especially meeting other prospective adopters. we are going for sunday lunch with two couples we meton the coursein a couple of hours time. we meet up every month or so!


----------



## Donna Taylor

Hello,

Thank you for all your kind words and support, Alex you didn't upset me at all quite the opposite.

I don't feel I know you all well eough to do any personnals but I cant wait to hear all about your prep course on monday alex.

Boomerang girl - what day is your pannel hearing? it is a shame you have to go bacl to work, I doubt your get much work done if the outcome is good (which I am sure it will be form reading your posts)

Donna xx


----------



## gillywilly

Hi all
Just wanted to wish the girls going to panel this week good luck. You are nearly there I hope you manage some sleep!!! 
Alex like I say all the best for tomorrow. Our preparation course is MOnday and Friday this week. Had 3rd home study visit on Friday we discussed infertility and miscarriage I had last year. Went remarkably well. It amazes me how comfortable you can become so quickly with your sw. She said while its a negative event in our lives its a positive to bring to adoption. We have an understanding of the loss the children will have had.

Hi to everyone else I cant believe its getting sooooooo close to Christmas.

Love Gill


----------



## Donna Taylor

Hi sorry I keep butting in and asking daft questions I know I am getting ahead of myself with this one but, once approved for adoption and you are matched with a child is there any leave you can take from work like maternaty leave? I know it wouldn't be called that but do you receive the same sort of time off allowence? or do you have to take annual leave?

Donna xx


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Kylie & Tracey - Wishing you lots of luck with panel next week.  You will be fine    

Alex & Gill - Good luck with the Prep Course tomorrow, can't wait to hear all about them.  I'm not too far behind you now  

Donna - Welcome to the thread!  Check out this site, you will find lots of info! In the mean time if you need to know anything ask away as there is always someone who will be able to help you.
Link -  www.baaf.org.uk.

Magenta - Good news on the weight loss.

Jenny - Glad to hear everything is going well with HS  

LB - How did it go at panel?

One week to go until our Prep Course, getting excited!

Laine


----------



## LB

Hi girls

Laine - we were not required to attend panel - or invited come to that 
sw has not rang us with the outcome yet 
so we are waiting once again.

hope you are ok - how different next Christmas will be for you - bet you can't wait!

take care

LB
X


----------



## Mummytoone

Just a quick hello as Im freezing my **** off here.... Adam laying flooring in dining room and has french doors open   

LB- Hope SW phones you soon with good news  

No news this end........just cold    

We are on holiday this week so nice lazy week for us

Love to everyone

Lou xxx


----------



## LB

oooh lucky Lou 
- enjoy your weeks rest!
bet the flooring will look great.

we have been into town on a santy spree this morning then came back and had mince and dumplings - mmmmmmmmmm i am in heaven 

LB
X


----------



## Boomerang girl

hi girls feeling much morepositive following a pub lunch with fellow prospective adopters- and thanks for the good wishes!

donna- if you have worked for the required amount of time for your employer you are entitled to six months paid stat. adoption leave (105?) pounds a week or 90% of your weekly earnings whichever is lower (eg if you only earn 50 pounds a week you would get 45 pounds not 105!), then six months unpaid leave.

That is the legal requirement. very similar to the legal set up for maternity leave.  some employers have better occupational adoption leave packages, many gov. employees get the same package as maternity leave- but not for teachers like me unfortunately 

one partner will be required to take at least the six months off with the flexibility for longer depending on the needs of the children.

hope that helps

kylie
x


----------



## Donna Taylor

HI,

Thanks for anwsering my questions and pointing me in the right direction.
I didn't realise you had to take the full 6 months off, not sure how we will afford that but hay we will sort something when we come to it.

SAP is slightly less then SMP which surprises me! for SMP the first six weeks are paid at 90% before dropping to teh £105. looks like SAP is just £105

Thanks again your all helping loads, there is so much to know isn't there

Donna


----------



## Mum to a gorgeous cherub

Hi 

Wow what a busy week for us........................  

Gill and Alex, good luck for this week. We have found the prep course very thought provoking. Hope you enjoy it as much as we are.

Tracey and Kylie, good luck for panel. Iam sure you will be fine  

LB, really hope you get some good news this week. I would be very annoyed with your SW  

Hi to everyone else  

We had our 2nd prep course yesterday which went very well. We had a heavy session about the types of abuse children could have suffered. We also covered attachment issues which I have to say scares me a little bit! But Iam sure we will be fine   Back next week for our 3rd day

H x


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi all,

good luck to you two (fours really I suppose  ) going to panel this week. I'm sure you'll pass with flying colours. I was an emotional wreck and couldn't remmeber anything when I was in there, but we still passed!

LB.....i must have missed your news, what is it youre waiting to hear about. Another potential match? that would be excellent!

We've no news really. we're second in line for the sibling group (because we're only approved for 2 and not 3). So we'd have to go back to panel to be re-approved. So waiting to hear if this other family is going to proceed before we can move on or forward. But at least we're still in the running!

no more news,
Xruth.


----------



## Nats

Hi

Nice to see that most of you are busy doing something!....and hopefully it wont be too long before we have some new mummies and daddies!...

No news here either....we are just keeping busy with all our Xmas shopping, although i can happily say that mu mission is 100% complete!   

Natsxx


----------



## Donna Taylor

Hello,

How is everyone?

Nats can I ask you a question? sorry if this is a bit forward but what aged child are you hoping to adopt? my reason for asking is you were approved in march? and still haven't been matched. or am i being really nieve about the whole process?

sorry if its a silly question

Donna xx


----------



## KarenM

Donna

For a full breakdown on adoption leave rights, check out this site.  I use it when I ma advising on the work issues board and also for work.

www.tiger.gov.uk

Good luck
Karen x

PS Please feel free to ask as much as you want - well within reason!!


----------



## LB

Hi girls

we have had our call from SW - basically the panel was an enquiry about placement breakdown - don't have a lot of info yet but they say we should do some more work on attachment. 

we did attend a meeting last week which was very enlightening and to be honest we are going to discuss the options of adopting much younger siblings.  We just feel this is the right move for us so we can share as much of their lives as possible and meet some of our parental needs too.  we are thinking we need to be there  at the toddler stage etc - hope this makes sense 

good luck everyone
LB
X


----------



## Nats

Donna - thats fine..ask away!!

We have been approved for 0-2 years, I think there must be a shortage in Essex!, because our SW also have another couple in the same town that have been waiting 14 months for the same age...of course we both have different things to offer, but she has made it clear that we will be in for a wait....
Although we did get matched with a baby a few months back (only learned this on our 6 month review) but when they case went to court about the welfare of the child, the judge felt it was a safe option to return the baby back home...so you never know do you....but I do often feel that everyone else doesnt seem to wait that long!..

Never mind, am used to it now.....and its easier than it has been!

Good luck!

natsxx


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi LB,

all sounds quite scarey....but you seem to have it all in hand. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Donna, we've been approved for 6 months now for 1-2 children up to 6 years old. We're very open about the age/sex and would accept mild to moderate learning/behavioural  diffidulties. also because our familes are very mixed we are approved for dual heritgae children too......so we thought we'd be matched up really quickly.....but still waiting. 

I guess the (very long-winded) point i'm trying to make is that there is no predicting timings with adoption........but at least we know it will happen sometime! The waiting is no where near as hard as when TTC.

XXRuth.


----------



## magenta

hi everyone,

Just popping on to ask for   positive vibes/big prayers this afternoon for our first homestudy visit.  We've not met the SW before cos she's new (I think she's a SW trainee cos i know she said she would be fully supervised but hadn't done this before).  Anyway...we had really hoped for one of the SWs from our prep course or the SW who did our initial visit but we've ben placed with Elaine.

Please God let her like us and not think we'd be cr*p as parents. 

Anyway...it is only 12noon and the appoointment isn't til 3pm but I am almost killing myself in anticipation....heading for  lunch and a walk to the beach with a friend then heading home to do more hoovering.  all vaguely positive and 'keep calm' vibes appreciated.

magenta x


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hey magenta, 

you'll be fine......she'll probably be more nervous than you if its her first time!!

easier said than done this, but......relax and enjoy it!

Xruth.


----------



## Nats

Magenta- 
Wishing you all the best for your first home visit!

I must say that I had a great time doing it and both me and dh felt quite sad when it was all over!....

YOU will be fine!

Natsxx


----------



## Mummyof2

Good luck Magenta.  Our first visit was just an introduction of the sw to us and booking times in when sw would be coming for proper home visits.  Nothing too scary.  Actually our sw is not scary at all as she is very nice - more like a new family friend that a sw.  Sometimes I forget she is actually a social worker    Don't like the hours of homework we get though.  My dh is still working on his individual profile and that is now 8 pages long on A4 sheets.  Mine ran to 11 pages of A4 sheets.  Then there was the 5 pages on relationships we had to type up and tomorrow it will be miscarriage/infertility to talk about and type up.  The support eco map took me 6 hours to do.  Good job I am not working full time or I would be really struggling to fit this all in.  

All the best

Jenny


----------



## keemjay

God Jenny, all this homework talk is frightening me   wasnt expecting to have that! has everyone else had this amount of work in their homestudy?

Magenta - wishing you all the best this avo. Ruth's right, I'm sure she'll be more nervous than you.....

nothing to report this end - we have confirmed that we will be attending the feb/march prep courses so now its just waiting for that....we are plenty busy tho with the arrival of our 7 wk old pup - he's enormous fun, very cute and very entertaining...and is sleeping thru the night too....the first 2 nights i wondered what the hell we'd done, but he's got the hang of it now!

love to all

kj x


----------



## Laine

Hey Magenta,

Thinking of you  

Laine


----------



## magenta

TA DA!!!  

Yes...i survived!

Thanks for all your well wishes.  the meeting went really well and Elaine seems really nice.  i think we're going to get on really well.  

Only slight problem might be timescale cos the agency wants to fast track us and be finished homestudy by the end of February.  I think this is partially so that Elaine does a full homestudy with us before she finishes her placement but also we are quite young and there shouldn't be too many skeletons to deal with re others in the household, infertility or previous relationships. Anyway...it does mean we will be doing a session each week at least (with some weeks doing two sessions). I'm not sure if my work will be quite so happy to let me have time off if they know it will be so frequent. DH will have to work out a change of shift to be able to attend all the meetings up til Christmas  - nvermind next year.

On a more positive note - it means we are further ahead on our journey than we thought and that teeny tiny bit closer to becoming parents.

We got a load of paperwork to do for next week - section 1 forms; chronology forms; disclosure and local authority check forms etc.  But apparently that should be the worst of the form filling.

magenta x


----------



## Mummytoone

Hey Magenta thats great news well done   why is it that social workers fill us with nerves!! It scared the livivng daylights out of me just having the first visit  

Well done anyway, sounds like your journey is gonna be a quick one 

Love lOu xxx


----------



## alex28

Thats great news Magenta!!

We we havejust ended day 2 of our prep course so only tomorrow to go now!  God my head is buzzing with so much info buts its been great so far and really good to meet with other couples in similar situations - we even met a couple where the male has the same condition as DH too!  

Not sure what will happen after the course finishes?  I think i wil wait a few weeks and then email SS to see whay happens next.  We are pleased though that most of the others on the course have been waiting over a year for the course and we seemed to have got it quite quickly.  It has also been great to have some foster carers on our course too as they have such experience of the system its so good to pick their brains!!!

Hope everyone else is doing ok, Gill??  Laine good luck for next week - you will be knackered believe me!!

love for now. xx


----------



## gillywilly

Hi guys
Magenta that is super news - heres hoping a quick journey is yours!!!
Alex glad your days are going well.
We had first course day Monday back Friday for last day. It was great rather large groups of 18. We were all pleasant and it was enjoyable. Like Alex head is buzzing.
I have my 1-1 next week. God its all moving so fast!!!!!!!!!
Hi to everyone else

Love Gill


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello quick one from me to day hello to you all.

Blimey its cold isnt it! Lovely and sunny here too so a lovely wintery day  

Just bathed Harry as we are off to Ventrue potraits in a bit for our pictures. We are taking Hector our maine **** along with his remote control mouse, so should be eventfull!!!   

Love to everyone

Lou xxxxx

P.S Reading about the prep courses sound really exciting, pleased you are all enjoying it, good luck xxxx


----------



## Mummyof2

Magenta - glad to hear that all went well and that you are going to be fast tracked - lucky you.

Lou - hope the pics at Venture went well.  We enjoyed ours there a few years ago although you do get the hard sell when it is time to preview your pics.  We only bought the one that was on offer as the prices are not cheap.  They show the pics on the wall which is painted white.  Our son was only a toddler at the time and he toddled up and put his hands on the wall in the middle of the pics.  We thought it was hilarious but the salesman was not so pleased and said they prefer you not to bring your children to the preview.  Miserable so and so.

Gill and Alex - glad you enjoyed your preparation course.  I found it very tiring as well as there is a lot of information to take in and think about.  Plus we had homework to do.

We have got our 4th home study visit tonight.  Dh has more or less completed his individual profile but needs to speak to his parents to get dates of when things happened.

Regards to everyone

J


----------



## keemjay

Lou - enjoy your portraits - hope the animals behave themselves!! jen is right, you will end up spending a lot of money  but it'll be worth it...

can i ask you a vet-y question? i bought some anti-chew spray to stop Caleb munching things he shouldnt in a weak moment. but he just licks it off as if he likes the taste and carries on chewing  have i just bought a cheap rubbish one or do they generally just not work? is there particularly a good one out there that you would recommend?

magenta - so pleased your visit went well and you got on well with sw - sounds like you're gonna race ahead now 

kj x


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi,

well we've finally heard that the sibling group we were being considered for have found a family. It's a shame, but what can you do! There's a teeny bit of relief as it was 3 children, and I think it would have been stretching us, but I know we'd have coped all the same.

Anyway when I told our SW (i of course had to do the finding out!) about this she was very sweet, and seems to think there maybe someone for us in our LA.....she's going to find out more, and I'll keep you posted if I hear anything!

Well done magenta.....you'll be kept busy with homework alright! Maybe you could get some of it down over the holidays....ask your SW for a blank form F and then you'll have an idea of the sort of questions you'll be asked and the info and memories you'll need to compile.......sorry if that sounds like a really geeky suggestion, but I always was a bit of a swot!   

xxruth

PS caleb the puppy looks georgeous!


----------



## superal

Hi Ruthiebabe

Just read your message & was sorry to hear that the family you were hoping to adopt didn't happen, it's a shame but as you said 3 is a lot & if your SW has someone in mind for you then brilliant, I'm always a believer in fate & this was most probably meant to happen.

Hope every one is okay, does anyone know if Molly has found out about the baby girl they were hoping to be matched with?

No news here, DD is really excited about Christmas & keeps saying it's not fair she has to wait!!  

TFN
Andrea
xx


----------



## saphy75

Hi everyone, 

sorry i haven't posted for ages but i haven't had much to post   well until now    looks like we will be going to panel in january    just waiting for our form F to be typed. I'm sooo excited and very scared too so any tips would be appreciated  

thanks, pam xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Hello everyone

Saphy that is fab news!!! Will keep me eye on you for some exciting news, good luck with the next few weeks  

Ruth sorry to hear you have missed out on the sibling group, however you are sounding upbeat and Im sure your new family is just around the corner. Hugs xxx

LB thanks for the IM have IM'd you back 

Sitting in bed with new lap top ahhhhh bliss......... just about to read OK but just wanted to post to say how fab Venture was although I fear it could be an expensive day on Friday when we go back to view the pictures. Was shown very quickly a couple of them and Hectors eyes looked amazing so we will see.
Does anyone know how they can use the pictues as there avators when they are so tight on copyright? Just noticed a few people on FF have them also have seen them posted in the gallery, I want to!!!

right bed time now for me

Love to everyone

Lou xxxxx


----------



## Pilchardcat

Hey.....get you Lou !! Lady of the manor with your laptop and Ok! you just need some chocies now ! enjoy it     I'd love to see your photos when you get some of them Lou, bet they will be fab.

Take care, love Amanda xxx


----------



## Mummytoone

Amanda had a pint of guiness in the pub earlier and fish and chips so have had my fair share of naughties for the day!!!

Hope you are all well

Love Lou xxxx


----------



## Pilchardcat

Sounds lovely Lou. Bet Mr Lou is watching footie though....mine is !   I'm fine thanks hun, hoping for some lovely snow this weekend 

Love Amanda xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Hmm is it on then? We have been watching the insect programme about our friends the snails  we are very sad and love all the nature programmes 

Snow......... could be fun if we get some 

Love Lou xxx


----------



## Pilchardcat

is it on ??! It's always on in our house  wahhh !!  I saw a TV ad the other day for a new David Attenborough programme on creatures from the undergrowth, spiders, ants etc and it looks really good. Think it starts next week, I will be watching that  so I'm not going to laugh at you and Mr Dolittle and your snails     Amanda xx


----------



## Mummytoone

It was on tonight Amanda !!!!!!!


----------



## Pilchardcat

Really !!   , see I would never make a vet like you, no memory     ahhh well, will have to catch it next week instead now, that's Ian fault with the blooming footie


----------



## naoise

Hi ladies,

Sorry I haven't been around, my broadband was down. What a lot has happened in just a couple of days 

Magenta well done on your home study all systems are go 

We finished our prep course on Tuesday, we seemed to have got on really well, we swopped numbers with a few people, one couple just live down the road so we will definitely keep in touch with them. Now we are jsut going to have to play the waiting game again for the phone call about our homestudy. We are certainly not expecting them to ring before Xmas. They spoke about what goes in your favour for adopting like what you willing to take and your age so that made me quite hopeful. But we will just have to wait and see.

Saphy just wanted to say all the best for panel I'm sure everything will be fine.

Ruthiebabe sorry that your gut feeling is saying that the two children aren't the ones for you, you are definitely better to say how you feel now.

LOL Keli


----------



## Ruthiebabe

Hi Saphy/Pam,

I was thinking I hadn't seen anything of you for a while. Did you enjoy the homestudy then? As for advice for panel, I'm sure your SW wouldn't put you forward if you weren't going to be passed. And if I'd received any advice before going to panel myself it would have all gone straight out of my head as I was a bit of an emotional wreck that day!   

Lou and andrea....thanks for your kind words, and I'm a believer in fate too, so what will be will be.....although it won't stop me chasing my SW up !   

xruth


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Magenta - Fabby news!

Lou - Look forward to seeing those portraits.

Pam - Wishing you heaps of luck for panel.

Ruth - Sorry to hear about the sibling group.  Hope you get matched soon.

Andrea - Can just imagine how excited your dd must be!

Gill, Alex & Keli - Glad you enjoyed your Prep Courses.

Hello everyone else.

Laine


----------



## alex28

Phew!
Prep course over and done!!!!
I can honestly say that it has totally wiped me out - my brain has never been so active  
Thoroughly enjoyable and a real eye-opener as it makes you think about so much more thats involved.
Anyway the SW said our reports would be done by Friday (tomorow) and we should receive the application form to complete and send back and once they have received this they will allocated us a SW and from this application form to panel would be no more than 8 months and this is there criteria so heres hoping that by September next year we will be approved!!!

Keli - glad your enjoyed yours too - now the waiting game!!

GIll - hope yours went ok

Laine - good luck for next week.

Pam - good luck for panel. xx

Magenta - great news about being fast-tracked!!

Sorry if i have missed out on anyone imy head is still in a blurr and i need a few days to get it back to normal!  (if ever is was before!!)
xx


----------



## Mummytoone

Alex

Cool well done and pleased you have enjoyed it! I fear our LA could be a little more slow than yours   Propably wont be laughing in a few months though.....

Hope you dont have to wait too long for your SW to be allocated to you.

Lots of love

Lou xxx


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## Mummytoone

Hello everyone

Laine not long till your prep course now, thanks for the IM will reply shortly x

Keli pleased to hear your prep coures has gone well, I should imagine its nice to meet other couples in the same boat. Am looking forward to that bit!

Sorry not many personals, am on the lap top again and it takes so much longer to scroll up and down...

Still enjoying our week off work. Had builder round today to quote for fitting our new kitchen and installing a downstairs cloakroom. Cant tell you how nice it is to finally spend money on things we can actually see and not blood tests and miserable tx. Tonight we are going out for a Chinese and taking MIL who is a bit down in the dumps bless her. I am very lucky and have a very sweet MIL who is totally non interferring! As Adams dad died so young (when he was just 46) she struggles from time to time with bits and pieces but on the whole has coped really well. So we thought we would take her out tonight for a little treat. 

Well still very cold here, about half hour ago this horrible black weather front came over and the winds came from no where. Really weird....am going to have to wrap up nice and toasty tonight. Harry is tucked up on top of his big blanket in our arm chair looking pleased with himself after his walk, bless him. He is such a love.

Big shopping day tomorrow with SIL and friend, we are off to B'ton to buy our Christmas party dresses, we will propably end up fighting over the same dresses! 

Right fed up of this lap top now so will leave it at this.

Love to everyone

Lou xxx


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## alex28

Lou said:


> Alex
> 
> Cool well done and pleased you have enjoyed it! I fear our LA could be a little more slow than yours   Propably wont be laughing in a few months though.....
> 
> Hope you dont have to wait too long for your SW to be allocated to you.
> 
> Lots of love
> 
> Lou xxx


Why do you say that Lou?? Have they not said how long it could take I know they have guidelines but you never know it could go slower or quicker than we think. We had a chap who came into talk to us he was on his prep course last Sep, applied last oct, approved Feb this year and placed with children in August!!! She did say that was very unusual though! Best start saving just in case!!

From reading on here though i dont think there is a set time -it will happen when it happens im sure.

Lets hope things start moving quickly for you though. xx Hope you have a nice meal -0 im having left over stew and some dumplings ive just made - YUM!!!


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## TraceyH

We did it and passed our Panel yesterday.  They were very impressed with our Life Book and the doctor on the panel was very complimentary about my weight loss.  I have only just come down to earth.  I was so stressed yesterday morning, elated yesterday afternoon and tipsy yesterday evening, so consequently had a very early night as I had no sleep the night before - but it is over now and we are keeping our fingers crossed that the next stage won't be too long a wait.  Today I have got a skinking cold which has probably come on now I have relaxed.

Kylie - Hope your panel went okay today.

Good luck to everyone else at your various stages.

Tracey


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## Laine

Tracey - Congrats! and Well Done on being approved.  Hope you don't have to wait too long before you are matched. 

Laine


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## alex28

Great news Tracey and hope the next wait is not too long. xx


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## everhopeful

Hi to everyone!

Not had time to read through everyone's posts for a while, so no personals - sorry. Hope everyone okay.

We celebrated our 6 months with xxxx yesterday. Or not, as it turned out. My poor little baby was very poorly . Never seen her like that before. Just lifeless, burning up, no appetite (which is very unusual!). We had a very worrying day,  and yet today I look back and see how nice the quiet was!! She's much more back to her old self. Running around and shouting a lot! But unfortunately she's had trouble keeping food and drink down. Visited doctors for the third time this week! Luckily she's gone since lunchtime without redecorating my living room! And even managed some tea tonight so feeling quite optimistic that she's on the road to recovery. Fingers crossed anyway!
I think there must be a bug going round, just hope we don't catch it from her! Quite likely with all the cuddles and kisses she's been getting!!

I'd like to say I'm organised before my return to work, but sadly not. There's 101 things I wanted to get done but surprisingly (not for me) my superwoman powers have been waning somewhat!!
We've had confirmation in the post today of our court hearing. So at last some good news! Thank you for all your kind messages last week. It's been decided that we'll do the official side of it on our own, and plan celebrations in the new year. 

We're going to have a fantastic Christmas in spite of anything else going on, it's the only present I've asked for every single year for the past 6, and finally our angel has arrived - although a little heavy to go on top of the tree!! 

I will be reading and posting occasionally, in between the office, housework, baby sick, hospitals, oh of course the odd nervous breakdown!!
If I could pull myself away from the TV the odd night, the ironing pile would have more chance of reducing! Saying that, if I don't catch up before the weekend, we'll all be walking around starkers! (What a frightening image!)  

Bye for now x



PS TraceyH - CONGRATULATIONS! Hope you not waiting long x


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## Boomerang girl

tracey honey,
just blew you a bubble,
same experience all round,
approved. very positive experience a panel, very tipsy right now   
just hope not too long a wait.
lucky enough to have some playground equipment dropped on my finger yesterday. went to a & e today, have to go back tomorow morning for x rays. what fantastic celebrations!
lets hope its not too long now, but to be honest I just wanted pproval for xmas. every month from now on in is another month (in terms of savings) I can stay at home with our children.
so.
congrats tracey- MUMMY!!!!! doesn't that sound good?x


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## Nats

Tracey-----

CONGRATULATIONS on being approved.....over the last hurdle and on the home stretch now!    

Natsxx


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## magenta

Congratulations Tracey and Boomerang!

I am sooo happy for you both I am almost bouncing up and down in my office chair. I was waiting and waiting to see your posts... and was overjoyed to see the news.  

For those of us still ploughing through paperwork it really is a joy to see others being approved and moving closer towards parenthood.

magenta xx


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## Mummyof2

A big congratulations Tracey and Boomerang girl.  Well done to you both.

Ever - sorry to hear that your dd has been so poorly.  Hope she is soon on the mend.

dh has finally finished his individual profile and it ran to 10 pages on A4 as I suspected (mine was 11 pages).  Phew.  Social worker was delighted with our ecomap of our support network and said she will use it as an example to show others in the future as it was so detailed and just what she was looking for.  Mind you it took me 7 hours to do!!  This week's homework is on childlessness and the route we took to come to adoption.  We also spoke about the competencies and she brought some examples to look at (no Karen, not yours   - but it was someone we knew from our preparation course so that was a bit strange seeing all their personal stuff  ).  We are away for the weekend at a friend's house so I will be asking her to fill out some of the competencies while we are there.  SW has asked me to find two local friends that I could ask to look after our child/children in an emergency and bring them along to my house next Wednesday to fill out a crb form.  Have managed to find two but felt a bit awkward asking them to be crb checked but they have agreed.

All the best

J


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## Laine

Kylie - Congrats! to you both on being approved!

Laine


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## Ruthiebabe

congratulations tracey and kylie! It's a great feeling isn't it!!

so what age groups have you been approved for?

xruth


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## alex28

Kylie - well done - hope you're not too hungover!!!

Like Magenta says its great to hear your news as it gives us all hope and theres light at the end of this tunnel!!


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## Boomerang girl

thanks girls- the hangover was a bit of a stonker!! oops!
still- how many women can go out and get spiffy on the day they find out they are going to be a parent

ruthie we have been approved for one or two children aged birth to fifth birthday.

we are guessing we will get a sibling match as they seem to think we would cope very well with that.

I'm a bit tired now to be honest- I hadn't really slept all week with worry, then a bit too much champagne last night, so I am glad it is friday and I hve the weekend to chill out.

I also think the timing is good for us as I know there will be a bitof a lull now before we hear anything so having xmas coming up will give us something to do and enjoy

magenta your time will be here before you know it- once our home assessment started it was really quick- the assessment was finished in 3 and  half months, the other two and a half months were the social worker wrtiting up our forms and waiting for crbs to come back (we hd lived in london so it took ages!)
kylie
x


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## Mummytoone

Hello everyone

Kylie- pleased you had a fab time and congratulations once again, your right, perfect timing and lots to take you mind off any waiting. Hope the wait wont be too long for you.

Jennifer- certainly sounds like hard work to me, but no doubt it will be worth it in the end. Keep it up!

Laine- hope you are OK. Can I ask you a gardening question.... my fuchsia bushes are looking a little unhappy since the frosts, will they recover do you think? They had grown so well and I'm so worried about them. Anything I can or should have done?

Ever- sorry to hear xxxx has been a poorly girl especially on her special day, hope she is feeling better soon. xxx

Karen- Hope you and the girls are well. How is your dad doing?

Everyone else hello, am on the lap top again so that is my excuse for lack of personals again..... sorry

Been for a shopping day today in Brighton, saw Jordan's family as per normal. They are always shopping!!!!
Bought myself a naughty dress today, was rather expensive and now I'm worried I don't like it. It was a little boutique shop and they don't do refunds.....darent tell Adam but am just going to have to wear it.
Been to Venture tonight.... awwww what an experience.... the pictures are stunning...... have ordered one and got one free one. The one we ordered is stunning of Hector. Will try and work out a way of posting it in the gallery once we have collected it. It is so beautiful. 
Hopfully we will go back when we have a new addition to our family, cant wait.

Adam is out tonight at one of the boys house playing poker with 12 others so i am stuck in, mind you its freezing so quite happy tucked up on the sofa under the blanket, snuggly!

Love to everyone

Lou xx xx


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## KarenM

Tracy and Kylie - Congrats on your panel success.  Hope you don't have to wait too long.

Alex - congrats on completing your course.

Lou - dad's ok (ish) thanks.  He has his op booked for 14th December so will be in for Xmas.

Just a quick look in as I am looking at a number of other web pages at the same time!!

TTFN
Karen x


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## cindyp

Congratulations to Kylie and Tracey on your approval, hope it's not long until you're matched.

Ever, sorry to hear DD has been poorly, it's horrible isn't it to see them suffering.  I'm sure lots of your TLC will help her feel better.

Jennifer, sounds like your LA are a lot more strict than mine, my friends never had a CRB check and it sounds like they're getting you to rewrite War and Peace.  I bet you'll be glad when it's all over, won't be long now.

Pam, I'm sure your panel will go fine.

Gill, Alex and Keli, glad you enjoyed your prep courses, they're intense aren't they?

Ruth, sorry things didn't work out but I think you're right sometimes things happen for the best.  I'm sure my DH and I couldn't have had a birth child as gourgous as our DS.

Andrea, it was so cute reading about your DD's excitement, my little boy's too young to realise what's going on but I'm so looking forward to seeing his face on Xmas morning although we have his birthday the week before so it may take some of the gloss of Xmas.

Lou, make the most of these shopping days, clothes shopping and children do not mix   

Hope everyone else is well.

Won't be posting much in the next few weeks.  I've a friend visiting this weekend, our DS has 2 birthday party invites for the 3rd/4th, then we're off to France for the 10th/11th.  We're moving house on the 15th December, it's DH's birthday on the 16th and my son's birthday on 17th.  Oh and I believe there's something called Xmas that I need to start preparing for.

HELP!!!!

Will try and keep up with everyone's news.

Have a great weekend.
love
Cindy


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## Boomerang girl

thanks for the good wishes...
let's all think of how karen's dad can have a special xmas in hossie!

it is great to be approved! DH, who has always been very reserved about the whole thing, keeps coming out with cracking excited comments.. like, "I dont suppose karen (sw) has phoned yet with our twin boys ready for collecting before xmas?" okay yes he was joking but it was sweet! and "did you know next time we get a passport sorted or go abroad their will be our children to get their own?

if u knew my dh you would know how out of character that is. it brings tears to my eyes and shivers to my spine how important this is after seven years of wanting to be parents, to finally hear something positive!


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## superal

Congratulations to Kylie & Tracey on being approved, it's such a great feeling & the excitement of it all really hits home now, let's hope you don't have to long to wait for your children.

Karen - hope your Dad is not to bad, Christmas in hospital is a bit of a bummer but you can make it special for him, just taking your two little girls to see him, I'm sure will put a smile on his face. 

Cindy - Cor you are going to busy, enjoy as much you can, DS nearly 2 where has the time gone?

Kylie - loved reading your messages about DH, brought back a lot of memories, your DH will be jumping every time that phone rings now! 

Lou - glad to hear your shopping trip goes a bit like mine!  I buy things thinking I really like that, go home try it on again & think I don't like it now so I'm glad there is someone out there just like me!  (mind you I don't buy from expensive shops & always keep the receipt & I'm very good at hiding them from DH!) 

Ever - sorry to read DD has been poorly, hopefully she is fine now & got rid of all those nasty viruses before Christmas, enjoy this Christmas with her, it will be fantastic, Our DD is 5 now & is so excited its really lovely, although a bit draining when she constantly asks when she can open her advent calender!

Hi to everyone else, hope you are all fine, I dreamt last night that someone heard about twins! Kylie your DH joke could come true? Sorry I couldn't picture a name of who is going to fine out but I would love to know if some one does find out about twins, that would be really spooky! 

DD is full of the excitement of Christmas, I'm off out in a minute with her as DS & DH are both out for the day & she wants a "girlie" day with her Mummy, shopping, I've got her well trained!

Love & best wishes to you all

Andrea
xx


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## TraceyH

Thanks for all your good wishes.

It does feel strange being approved, it is just so exciting.  I didn't realise how tired I was until the last couple of days when I have really relaxed.  I suppose it is the sign of things to come!

With Christmas just around the corner (this time next month it will all be over) it is strange to think it might be our last christmas on our own and next year (hopefully) my neice will have a new cousin to charge around after.  

We have been approved for a single child between 0 and 2 1/2.

It is funny how DH has managed to keep his emotions in check (unlike me) until now when he has started looking at baby things in magazines and picking up the baby books at my sisters and keeps making soppy comments.

Thanks again and good luck to everyone else.

Tracey


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## LB

Tracey and Kylie - congratulations ladies great news that you have passed with flying colours enjoy your last bit of freedom.

Cindy your comment of my ds is two on the 17th made me go all goosepimply - simply magic!

take care
LB


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## Donna Taylor

congratulations to Tracey and Kylie you must be over the moon xx


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Alex - Hope you are allocated a SW soon. You never know, you may start HS sooner rather than later.

Ever - How is your dd now?  Better I hope.

Kylie - How's the finger?

Jenny - Pleased to hear your dh finished    I didn't realise that friends may have to have CRB checks!  Also, I am really interested in hearing about the competencies, hopefully on our Prep Course.

Lou - My fuschia bush has done exactly the same.  They are hardy, but if it is severly cold they will 'check back'.  I would leave them as they are as they will lie dormant through the winter.  In the Spring, just prune them back to ground level and they should turn back into beautiful bushes again    Let us know when those piccies are in the gallery!

Karen - Hope everything goes ok for your dads op on the 14th x

Cindy - Have a good time in the next few weeks - busy mummy!

Andrea - Awww a girlie day shopping, how lovely.

Hi to everyone else.

I am getting excited about our Prep Course.  It starts tomorrow evening at 7pm for a couple of hours, which I guess is for intros and course content?  We then have two days Tuesday & Wednesday and one day the following Wednesday.

I expect the excitment will turn to nerves nearer the time  

Laine


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## alex28

Laine - good luck for tomorrow honey - get a good nights sleep!!!


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## LB

Laine 

good luck matey you are going to be fine - suppose everyone gets a little nervous but you will soon settle in with all the other couples and hopefully make some new friends 

have a good night and be sure to let us know how it all went

love and luck
LB
X

you are on your way


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## Mummytoone

Laine,

Hope it all goes well tomorrow, you will be just fine and will propably be raring to go afterwards!

Thanks for the advice re the fuchsias, they are looking a little sorry for themselves  

Love Lou xxx


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## KarenM

Laine - Good luck for tomorrow. I am sure you will be fine.

Cindy - Good luck for the move and the birthday celebrations.

Thanks for the good wishes for my dad. I will be taking the girls to see him on Xmas day but just trying to determine what to do with my Mum and brother. I want them to come and have dinner with us but I know my dad will be upset thinking he is missing out on time with the kids. He's going to be in intensive care for a few days after the op but hopefully he'll be a bit more with it come Christmas.

The next issue I have is my brother goes away to Africa on 7th Jan for 9 months. He then comes home to take my Dad to the Ryder cup (for his 60th) and then he's off to NZ for 3 months. So with my sister living in the States the only sibling who will be at home is ME!!!

I plan to update the list in the next few days so if you haven't already done so please post an update on the thread called list (link attached) then I can lock this thread and start a new one with a nice new list.

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,41536.0.html

Love
Karen x


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## Mummyof2

Wow, we have really heavy snow outside at the moment.  First of the winter for this area.

Laine, just wanted to say that I hope the preparation course goes well tonight.

Hi to everyone else.

Jenny


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## Lou W

Hi there everyone, just wanted to see if I can join in on here.....
Ok so it's going to take me a while to read all the posts on this thread, but I hope everyone is well and not too cold! 
Looking forward to chatting to you all on this thread in the future....
Love Lou W xxxxx


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## superal

Hooray it's snowing & very heavy where we are, DH has just gone off to work moaning he's going to be really busy today & all he wants to do is pick DD up from school and build a snowman with her,AHH!

I love the snow but not to drive in so am going to be really good & pick DD up in plenty of time from school & take my time coming home, having a policeman as your husband - this information is drummed into you, it's very good advice though! 

Hope everyone is okay & enjoying the snow if you have any, look forward to reading everyones news soon.

Love
Andrea
xx


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## Lou W

ooooooooh we havent got snow today superal!!! wish we had! i love snow!!!
yes do take your time picking up DD, i bet she'll love the snow too!


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Lou W - Welcome to the thread!  Not long until your first visit.  Look forward to sharing your journey with you.

Thanks for all your good luck wishes for our Prep Course!  Really looking forward to it. 

Laine


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## sophie

Laine

Just popping in to say good luck for the first night of the course. Hope it goes really well

Sxx


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## Jo

Laine
Good luck hun  
I am sure you are going to do really well, and soon get your dream 

Love and hugs
Jo
x x x


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## Dee

Laine

Hope your course is going well.

Love
Dee
xxx


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## LizzyB

Laine ~ hope its all going fabulously for you 

Thinking of you, Lizzy xxx


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## *Kim*

Good luck Laine, you can do it.

Love kImx x x


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## Laine

Hi everyone,

Just a quickie (I am soooo tired) to let you all know that everything is going well with the Prep Course.  We have two more days to go...tomorrow and one day next week.

Thanks again to everyone for wishing us luck.  I really appreciate your support  

Laine


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## Barbarella

Firstly, many congrats to Tracey and Boomerang... what brilliant news!!!!  

Well, after our false start with the cancellation of our first home study appt... we changed the date to the following week and have already got through 2 appointments.  DH is doing is one-to-one this Weds and mine is next week.  

We are both so elated to finally being here, and actually doing something.  Not only physically, but also putting our doubts as to whether we were doing the right thing well and truly behind us.  We are so excited and are really loving the appointments with our SW... she is really on our wavelength (for those who can't remember, we put the process on hold for a month in July, and then had to wait for her to be available in Nov).

She thinks I'm completely mad, that I'm enjoying it so much.  We had no problems at all talking about our relationship and it all seemed to flow into her next question.  We didn't even feel like she was being intrusive at all.  I'm waiting for the bubble to burst, surely something will go wrong...!!

Anyway, just wanted to let you all know.  She said that we should go to panel around March/April, which we are amazed at.  We're still considering a sibling group of 2 under age 5 or a single.... still not sure and hoping to be guided by her during the process!!

Love and luck to all..
Cxx


----------



## Boomerang girl

Hiya!
welcome lou.w hope you enjoy your journey
laine great news the prepcourse is going wel- it is tiringthough isn'tit?

barbarella thanks for the good wishes. about the considerations it is possible to be a approved for "one or twochildren under the age of five"- we were!! sw said eventhoughwe would dogreat with a sibling group by putting that we would not miss out if the ideal single child came up!


----------



## Lou W

Hello everyone... Thanks for your welcomes to this thread !  
Laine - glad evrything is going ell with the prep course xx
Just had a quick question really... hope that's ok?
Firstly, with our first SW visit next Tuesday I just wondered what to expect? Is she going to make a decision based on this meeting about whether or not we can go any further with our application? I am really worried that as it's so soon after we discovered definite infertility problems that she might say we have to wait for a while. Would this be something she is likely to do? I'm hoping that the fact that we pretty much straight away knew adoption was the route we wanted to take that this will help, but I know that if you have had unsuccessful tx then they like you to wait a period of time before starting the adoption process... so would this be the same even without having had tx? 
Not sure what excatly to expect from this meeting really, so any rough idea would be gratefully received! 
Love to all 
Lou W xxxxxxxxx


----------



## Barbarella

barbarella thanks for the good wishes. about the considerations it is possible to be a approved for "one or twochildren under the age of five"- we were!! sw said eventhoughwe would dogreat with a sibling group by putting that we would not miss out if the ideal single child came up!
[/quote]

Thanks a lot Boomerang.. I expect we will do that. We were making up our minds whether to add the sibling group or not, wondering whether we could cope with going from nothing to 2 children. I suppose we should cover all eventualities.. I just don't want to be raising hopes and then turning down sibling groups when the time comes...!!


----------



## Mummyof2

Lou W - sorry can't help on your question as we had tx first.  

Just finished my christmas shopping so that is one less worry.

All the best

Jenny


----------



## Laine

Hi everyone,

Barberella - Glad to hear your HS has started and is going well.

Kylie - Yes very tiring but really informative.

Jenny - I just have my mum to buy for and that's my Christmas shopping finished too.

Lou W - I can't answer your ? either.  Tuesday is not too far away now, good luck.  Let us know how you get on.

We both found the Prep Course very exhausting but extremely informative and interesting.  We have been given homework to complete in the next month or so in preparation for our HS!  The first lot Chronology is due next Wednesday (our last Prep Course day).  


Laine


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## Boomerang girl

well done laine one step closer now!!

christmas shopping eeeerrrggghhhh!

feeling very bah humbug this year. probably because I am trying hard tosave for giving up work, and so many kids to buy for now, that once it gets to the adults I can't be bothered!

dh and I have decided not to buy for each other this year. we got the xmas present we wanted (being approved at panel) but might buy a couple of nights away in feb (previous xmas presents have included prague, paris, rome for 5 days each in feb half term- we prefer travel to material stuff).

I have to post the stuff to australia tomorrow, so the main stress has been getting that sorted intime.

laine I hope you are celebrating tonight with a big glass of bubbly!


----------



## Barbarella

Thanks Laine... look forward to hearing yours is starting very soon.  We enjoyed the prep course very much as well... the HS is even better..


----------



## KarenM

Time for a new home and I have updated the list....

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,43214.0.html

Karen x


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