# 1st ivf failed



## reikilisa (Jun 14, 2005)

Hello girls

Hope you don't mind me joining but had a negative test this morning and really upset i had so much hope about this cycle everything went so well and after them transfering two grade 1 embryos i thought one has got to take i just cannot get to grips of this being so unfair to us girls that have to go through this. 

We have been trying for 5 years have loads of IUI's and i had one pregnancy which i miscarried at 7 weeks so i thought maybe this would be my time.  Just dont know what to do next as its so expensive to have another go and dont know whether i am strong enough to keep on putting myself through the heartache and disappointment.  And having to tell everyone it hasnt worked and the disappointment in their voice makes me feel such a failure.  

love Lisa x


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## pepper (Jul 13, 2005)

Hi Lisa,

I'm sending you a big   . So sorry to hear your news. 

Look after yourself, I know its hard telling everyone but you will draw strength from this and when the time is right again you'll know what to do. 

Take care.

Pepper xx


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## Ems H (Aug 2, 2005)

Hope you don't mind me replying Lisa but I saw your message and my heart went out to you. I know how you feel. It is SOOO hard. My first IVF failed after a good number of eggs were collected and high quality embryos created. Getting over these hurdles gets your hopes up. I thought I would never stop crying. I did. You will too. I am starting my second full cycle at the moment (also had failed FET). Hang on in there. You don't have to do anything at the moment, you will decide what to do and when to do it in your own time. YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. You can't control this.
Take Care
Emma


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## Maria S (Jul 20, 2005)

Dear Lisa,

We may not be able to make things right for you, but what you can be sure of is that we all understand how you're feeling - many of us have been in exactly the same situation as you and know how painful it is to have all your hopes & dreams dashed - other people who have never faced infertility are not able to imagine the pain of *not * seeing a little blue line.

Look after yourself, get plenty of rest and allow the hormones to do their thing.. lots of crying is completely normal. You'll know when you are ready to try again - amazingly we all pick ourselves up and head back to it eventually 

Maria S


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## egf (Aug 11, 2005)

Hi Lisa

I've also just completed my first course of ivf and got a negative test  , i'm still coming to terms with it as like you everything was going great i had never looked and felt better.
I know that its hard not to think you are a failure becouse i did i felt i had let everyone down. I am realising that i was not anything i did or did not do it just was not ment to be this time. It is not fair i know i think like that too.  Keep talking to people, please don't bottle it up it helps.

love egf


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## reikilisa (Jun 14, 2005)

Dear Pepper,Emma,Maria & egf

Thanks so much for answering my post,  your kind words really do help and speaking to someone thats been through it and know how i feel,  all the people i know have got pregnant at a drop of a hat and i've watched so many children be born and growing up.  However i do feel a little better today and don't feel like i'm gonna start crying all the time.

Thanks again and i wish you all success
love lisa xx


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## egf (Aug 11, 2005)

I know how that feels my 2 best mate and my sis in law all feel pregnant easily and it hurts that me and my hubby want a child so much and we are having to go through this, but like you said each day you don't feel like crying as much as the last time. 

talking to you all is helping me thanks


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## 1Baby2Luv (Jun 17, 2005)

Oh how I understand this too well. DH and I have been trying for 5 yrs. too. On our very first IVF Cycle in June 2005, I had very good eggs and fertilization, but tranx 2 great embies and BFN. I was absolutely devestated. I cried and felt as if I have failed as a woman. I really went thru some "am I not worthy" issues. I didn't want to even try anymore, b/c of the amount of stress it put me in. 

I now have 8 embies on ice, and we start our FET when AF shows any day now. I am looking forward to it now.


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