# Anyone else scared of mothercare or is it just me??



## notgivingup (Apr 13, 2012)

We're in that lovely stage of going shopping albeit cautiously as officially linked but not matched.  I'm loving the shopping but can't bring myself to go into mothercare or mamas and papas cause I'm not going in with a bump and won't get to ever browse and buy 'baby' stuff.  
I feel ridiculous and am over the moon with our links (age 2 and 4), and long since come to terms with not having a baby but did anyone else feel a little tinge of 'would have been lovely to be buying xyz baby paraphernalia'??!
I'm sure it will all pale into insignificance when LOs are home. 
Or is it just me??


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## MummyPea (Jun 11, 2012)

Hi.

I felt like that to start with but once you explain to staff what you need and why they have always been fantastic and you get lots of 'that's wonderful' 'congrats' etc.

Enjoy it!

xx


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## GoofyGirl (Apr 1, 2013)

Hi there
Congrats on your link    fantastic news. 

My two LOs have only been with us a few weeks and I do still have pangs of wondering how different things would be with a birth child. only in that some things are more difficult, eg worries about attachments, not being able to get a babysitter / family member to look after them so no couple time for me n DH, worries about trauma, having to witness their grief etc etc. I did expect to feel some infertility sadness though so didn't come as a shock and actually I wouldn't change things, just sometimes remember the sadness and feelings of loss that we went through and it makes me feel sad. I too was definitely fully on board with adoption and had grieved our infertility but it will never leave me fully just what an awful experience we endured and how it has changed me. 

I went to a sling library before LOs came and it was full of brand new mums with tiny babies and lots of breastfeeding. I found it overwhelming and wanted to cry as I felt so different. But actually looking back I think the other ladies were really impressed that I was adopting. 

As for mothercare etc. If you can try to get yourself in there, you can still buy some nice things for your LOs, and you are allowed to browse whatever you like. Indulge yourself, I spent ages and like MummyPea said, when I explained our situation the girl serving was nearly in tears of joy! So I was made to feel very special. 
There were a few bumps in there but plenty of toddlers and even grandparents without any kids with them. 
If you don't want to go in then that absolutely fine but I sense that you would but are worried about feeling sad. I enjoyed buying things and getting their rooms ready. And now I pop into mothercare regularly with the LOs. 

Mothercare used to be a 'forbidden' place, but now it's actually really boring. 
Xxxxx


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## notgivingup (Apr 13, 2012)

Thanks mummypea and goofy girl.  I think you summed it up - it's like the forbidden place cause it was too painful to contemplate setting foot in there when going through ivf and now it 'feels' it's just for new babies.  Will venture there tomorrow and get over myself! I've loved all the other shopping, it just feels a bit like my nemesis! 
Relieved to know it's not just me! Thanks again. X


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## kimmieb (May 9, 2013)

My mum took me in there when we had our link back in November for a 8month pink to look at pushchairs - I was really nervous as loads of people with bumps and there was me with nothing but when I explained we were adopting they were fab! Understanding that it is nice for them to face in so they can see you are still there if they are having a bad day - I thought that was great as she understood the attachment side of adoption  

Enjoy!!


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## Waiting_patiently (Dec 4, 2013)

Anywhere you go once you tell your story there fabulous, our local Mamas and Papas pretty much shared our journey I was always in their browsing even after approval   Now our little man is here they love seeing him and following him growing up and changing after feeling they were part of it all, its lovely!


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## pyjamas (Jun 24, 2011)

We are also linked with MP next week. I have loved shopping for clothes mostly in Mothercare and Boots. We are buying 12-18 month size clothes as LO will be moving in with us one week before her 1st birthday and will be coming with a fair amount of 9-12 month clothes from FC. We will always feel envious of those with small babies but our LOs will be even more special just because they are ours


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Mamas and Papas was our rite of passage.    Straight after our first approval panel, we drove to the nearest one and went round.  I had never been round a Mamas and Papas or Mothercare before then, I avoided them like the plague.  Even though we were linked with a two year old, it was always something I wanted to have 'the right' to do.

Second time around we did the same again.  

To this day, I've never bought anything from Mamas and Papas!  LOL!


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## becs40 (Apr 9, 2013)

Just a note on buying clothes as we immediately went out and bought 6-9month Sleepsuits and vests for our little man as knew he wasn't coming with a lot. We had to go back and change them for 9-12 months even though he was only just 6 months - chunky monkey! He's now 9 months and in 12-18 month clothing! 😱


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

lol - on a separate note Becs - we bought an outfit when link was confirmed of next size up.  Our LO was so teeny, he didnt actually get the wear it til 10months later and even then they never really fitted (small waist so we always need adjustable trousers (waist and turn-ups that we can let down).

We had a similar journey to WP in that our local Mothercare couldn't be more helpful - even getting store manager to authorise an initial discount that's normally attributed to buying newborn equipment but we needed.  Needless to say they were so nice we've been back loads of times for additional car seats, clothes etc as we had such a great treatment from them.

My advice bite the bullet and enjoy the nice experiences as you are now "expecting".
x


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Same   Little pink is only now wearing the clothes we bought when we were linked.... that was 20 months ago   Little pink is a little dink and still in 12-18 month clothes. We also pre bought a carseat apparently suitable from age 9 months. Well they go off weight and it was nearly a year before she could go into a big seat! So mid intros we were round at a friends at half 9 at night borrowing their maxi cosy!! Never assume....


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## notgivingup (Apr 13, 2012)

Thanks everyone. We bit the bullet and went and it was fine.  I can't say I felt comfortable but that was no reflection on them as they were lovely and helpful. It just felt weird! 
We've held off buying anything which requires size or weight of the kids until we meet with foster carers in 3 weeks time, then it will be a mad rush to get it all! 
Thanks all! Life can resume as normal!


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## MummyPhinie (Oct 27, 2013)

It's not just you, I was the same. Having spent years going into mothercare and mamas and papas getting stuff for friends babies and feeling completely miserable it was daunting.  However the car seats mothercare were amazing and couldn't be more helpful as we didn't know weights just ages. Then when we went to mamas and papas (we had a discount store so went a bit mental!), I had done a lot of research about furniture, but the mattresses and buggies floored me, they started asking loads of questions, in the end I just said, "I have no idea what I'm doing, we are adopting x,y,z ages, help!", well that was it. Couldn't have been sweeter or more professional, my youngest adores his cot and sleeps so well we must have chosen well,
I now go in as a fully fledged mum just like anyone else, getting all the bits and pieces for normal family life, and some very adorable clothes (although we waited until they moved in as they are small children, we are only just fitting into some things people got us at the beginning!).
At Christmas In next I went in checking out clothes sizes and I asked about returns policy as I mine are dots, I made the woman actually cry when I said it was my first christmas as a mummy. Most people are so helpful and make you feel very special, just in a different way to those sporting massive bumps!


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