# New to all this and nervous



## Vik (Mar 22, 2006)

Hi my names Vik, I'm 30 and OH is 31.
I was diagnosed with Endometriosis 12 yrs ago and have had numerous ops.
We have our first appoiontment with fertility spec tomorrow and were both really nervous, not really sure what to expect.
Been ttc for 10 yrs and have always had hope but now were finally here i'm so scared its all gonna be taken away from us.
Just want to say this is a great site and good look to everyone.
Vik x x x


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## *Rach* (Jun 27, 2005)

Hi Vik 

Welcome to FF - Good Luck with your appointment tomorrow

*Rach*


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## xxTonixx (Jan 5, 2006)

Vik

Welcome to this wonderful place!

All the best and plenty of love luck and babydust!

Toni


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## ☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ © (Jan 13, 2005)

Hi & welcome to FF 

You'll find lots of support and a wealth of advice and information on this website 

Good luck with your upcoming appt tomorrow 

There is a separate board for ladies ttc with endo (like me  ) which can be found under the main board Starting out & diagnosis - again another board you may find of interest...

here's the links...

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/board,9.0.html

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/board,110.0.html

Take care
Natasha


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## Strawberries (Apr 6, 2005)

Hi Vik,
        Just wanted to say welcome to ff, its a great site.

Good luck with your appointment tomorrow, let us know how you get on.

Blowing you some bubbles  . And sending you lots of baby dust.    .


                                            Strawberries'n'cream.


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## Martha Moo (Jan 30, 2004)

Hiya Vik

Welcome to the site

Its a fab place to be 

Wishing u loads a luck for ur appt tomorrow darlin

love Emxx


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## Kamac80 (Nov 24, 2005)

hi vik and welcome to the site 

Good luck with the appointment tomorrow and hope u find this site of some use and support to u.

Kate xx​


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## sweetheart (Jun 14, 2006)

Hi Vic,

Glad you have found the site. You will get lots of support from people on here.  

Good luck for tomorrow. sending lots of baby dust and positive energy.

           

Katie. x


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## janie77 (Jun 3, 2006)

Hi Vik

Welcome to FF - you have come to the right place.  I only found this site myself a couple of weeks ago and am already totally addicted - the people on here are wonderful and very supportive and understanding and always have lots of advice.  I have found that this site has already helped me so much!!

Good luck with your apt tomorrow!
Janie x


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## maria684 (May 12, 2006)

Hi Vik

Welcome to FF you have definatley come to the right place, you will get heaps of support from everyone.

Good luck for your appointment tomorrow, i know the 1st one is the most nerve racking.

take care
love Maria xx


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## Vik (Mar 22, 2006)

Hi ladies.
Thank you all so much for the warm welcome.
This is a fantastic site, thank you Em for telling me about it.
Its so good to know we dont have to go through this alone and after reading through some messages (before i plucked up the courage to post) its great to see the support you all give each other.
I will keep you all posted on appointment.
Thanks again.
Love Vik x x x


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## Martha Moo (Jan 30, 2004)

Hiya Ladies

I have had an email from Vik who has asked me to update you on her appt

As you know Vik suffers from endo and has done for some years

Her appt brought not so good news, due to the damage inside caused by the endo and peritonitis.

The cons suggested transfer and implanation would be difficult and there are other risks too but has put her on the ivf list and vik will go back in 6 months and advise if they want to proceed.

Vik and DF are taking time to talk things thru and will be back with us soon.

Vik i know i have already said this but, i am here for you always, u have my email and my number if ever u need to chat here for  you always

Love Emxx


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## Vik (Mar 22, 2006)

Hi ladies.
First of all a big thank you to Em for posting for me and for the long chat last night, you're a star hunny.

We had our appt and news not so good, the cons was lovely and very sympathetic to my probs.
Our success rate is around 20% which i was surprised at(thought it would be lower) the main prob is that with having severe endo also i have major bowel probs and peritonitis twice, severe adhesions with ovaries stuck to bowel, so the main risk of IVF would be further damage to bowel which he said isnt strong enough to cope with more, i could end up with colostomy. The transfer and implantation would be very risky cos of all of this. I cant have any ops to help with IVF as further ops will cause more damage.
He also said i'm in a great amount of pain at the mo and if i got preg that would increase and obviosly wouldnt be able to take the meds i take now so would more than likely spend lots of time in hosp.
Because of the mess inside pregnancy will be very hard to achieve and keep hold of  
We have to go back in 6 months and let them know if we still want to go ahead with it, we have been put on list but he said adoption would be a much more safer route for us.
We are both really mixed up and confused at the minute and both very scared of the complications  
Thank you for reading this.
Love Vik x x x


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## Bratt (Sep 21, 2005)

I just wanted to send you a 



Life can be so very cruel at times

Jen
x


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## AmandaB1971 (Feb 19, 2006)

Hi Vik

I also just wanted to send you a   to show you some support!

Life is cruel, but I guess you have to just take a bit of time now to absorb the information and then decide on the best way forward for you both.  Please make full use of all the support you can get on here and take your time before you decide what to do, this is major information for you to take in and my heart goes out to you hunny..

Good Luck and take care

Amanda xx


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## Mrs_H (Jan 29, 2006)

Oh Vic, 

That was a bog blow ~   .... i'm glad the cons have given you time to think what you want to do, 

I know no one can help with the big task ahead of you but do view all the boards we have one on  adoption and moving on etc which may be worth a visit whist thinbking what to do ! 

so sorry things were not more positive xx

Sara xxxxx


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## kenbren99 (Mar 16, 2006)

Hi Vik

Don't know if this will help - obviously you are thinking over the next step for you and will do whatever seems right for you.  However, just to let you know that a good friend of mine had a similar experience and in the end (and after 4 failed ivf attempts and lots of heartache) they decided to adopt.  They are now adopting a baby girl from China and are so pleased and excited, buying their pram etc and it is so good to see them looking forward to the future after so much disappointment.  They are waiting to go to China to collect her any day now.  Also - they still have 1 frostie, so may try for a sibling in the future.

Anyway, you will make the right choice for you, just wanted to say that even in what seem like the bleakest of circumstances, there can be really happy endings!

Good luck, hun.

Brenda x


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## Vik (Mar 22, 2006)

Hi
Been taking a bit of time out to try to sort through things in my head, keep making a decision then changing my mind just dont know what to think and what to do.
Thank you all for your support.
Love Vik x x x


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## AmandaB1971 (Feb 19, 2006)

Hi Vik

I'm not surprised you don't know what to do hun!  There are 2 things that will help you; firstly in a situation as enormous as this it is easy to become over-whelmed by the decisions you have to make.  This can mean the more you think about it and worry the more confused and unable to make a decision you become.  You need to set yourself some "worry time" each day maybe for an hour or hour and a half and then you spend that time thinking and processing your options for the rest of the day you distract yourself and concentrate on other stuff.  This gives your brain the chance to recover and re-charge its batteries before you start worrying again and it will help you make more sound and rational decisions (I promise  ).  Secondly, write down all the options you have and all the consequences of each option - good & bad, then when you've finished review what you've written.  That will give you and your dh the best chance of seeing in an orderly fashion what the options are and what they will mean in real terms for you.. Neither of these things are easy but they will help you I promise.  

I know you're probably thinking an hour or so a day?!  Is she mad? That's no-where near enough time to think about this and make good decisions, but I promise it will be, an hour focussed time is much more effective than 24 hours of being confused, worn out and over-whelmed about it. 

No-one can tell you what you should do hunny, cos it's a really BIG situation for you to be in, so all I can do is give you a big     and give you some ideas on how to make the decision-making a little easier to cope with.

Take Care and Good Luck

Amanda xxx


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