# Donor IUI attempts? help!



## Gwendolyn

Hello
I am doing some terrible grieving since learning that 4th attempt at donor sperm IUI failed on Dec. 5th/04.
Can you please tell me what medical teams generally expect in terms of "adverage" number of times to expect before donor sperm IUI brings success?  I have no idea what is "normal"? 
The first 3 attempts included oral clomid....I heard that that your uterus lining can be compromised with this drug ...and that is my "gut feeling" for my case (I have light periods anyway...it was practically "nothing" when on clomid).
This last attempt included 6 days of puregon injections (2 good sized eggs indicated in vaginal ultrasound)....and we still experienced failure.  I am at wits end!  Where else should we be exploring in terms of potential "issues and problems".  No prior tests indicated problems for myself...other than having a fibroid removed in July 2003 in preparation for donor sperm IUI attempts.  DH has azoospermia.
Clinic was "very pleased" with my response to puregon in Nov (....but no baby for us....so hard to be "pleased")...and states it will continue in Jan/05 with same dose of puregon as in Nov/04.
What about this progesterone issue....is this something I should get checked out? (wouldn't it have been checked out?).  I know nothing here.
Please HELP!
Thank-you kindly, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

I can't answer your medical questions but I do know how you feel!!!  We just learned that our third IUI failed and I've been gutted ever since.  My clinic says that 4-7 attempts are the 'norm' for IUI.  I also had problems with Clomid and my lining- it started out looking good and then as soon as I took the Clomid - it actually started shrinking!  I took the drug for 5 days only so after I stopped it, I started drinking 2 cups of raspberry leaf tea and it started going back up.  I also had an HCG shot to control ovulation and the timing of IUI and this drug added more to my endometrium.  I am now researching sperm counts because the first two attempts were done with what I'm now thinking might have been really low numbers.  We used 8-9 million of 97-100% motile sperm (after washing) but everything I've been reading says we should be using higher counts- over 20 million...  Do you know what your counts were for your inseminations?  Did you do one or two inseminations? I've read of some successes with two inseminations, one at 12 hours after HCG and one at 36 hours...

Don't give up - even couples who get pregnant naturally take many months to get there!!  I try to keep this in mind myself as I'm very close to obsessing about babies.  I literally have it in my mind to one degree or another - always!!

Positive thoughts!
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Auggie...thanks for your reply....just good to hear from SOMEBODY offering good cheer.
I have heard of others (on FF) getting 2 inseminations around ovulation time (I have only ever done 1 during our 4 attempts)....we just haven't pursued that with our clinic as it hasn't been suggested and also I suppose in the back of our minds- we have considered the increased cost of 2 viles of donor sperm for one ovulation cycle.... and really had hoped that we would be lucky with one vile each attempt.
I know nothing about the sperm counts of the donor sperm we have purchased....maybe I ought to bump up the research as you have!
I have a book written by a couple successful with donor insemination and their counsellor....and they indicated 7 tries before they found success......so I guess I hang onto that.  However, my worry goes ten-fold with every failed attempt!
Thank you so much, Auggie....and I do look forward to others' comments...medically and not!  
Take care, Gwendolyn


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## alex28

Hi 
I have had to failed attempts at DI and 2 failed at IUI. Did DI first then foiund out i was not ovulating (did progesterone tests at days 21, 28 and 35) as this is the only true way (so i believe) of knowing if you have ovulated.  A pregnancy cannot survive without the body producing progesterone so this may be worth checkig out.  It surprises me that your clinic have not insisted you get the prog tests done a week after ovulkation and IUI??

I too have mentioned to my clinic about doing 2 iuis but have said this is not normal, although i know of an american lady who just had 2 and now has triplets on the way!!.

I too am taking clomid on days 2 - 5 but dont have the injecitopn to bring on ovulation.  My periods have been much heavier since taking the clomid, this month was a nightmare with having to change every hour (sorry TMI!!).  Hope this helps.  Not too sure about the raspoberry leaf tea, was told to avoid this in pregnancy until you are after 36 weeks pg and then it helps to bring on birth but before then told to avoid it altogether!

I am going to IUI in Feb and are hoping 3rd time lucky but have agreed with DH that we wil have the 6 attempts (have 6 months supply of clomid) b4 we maybe look into DIVF or even adoption.

Good luck for your next attempt.


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

I would definately look into the counts that your lab is producing after washing.  Have read a story about this woman who discovered that her lab was washing the sample again (even though it came IUI ready) and this further decreased the number that went back in.  Her clomid was increased and she made 4 eggs and the sample went up to 50 million and she got pregnant.  

We have done both, one insemination and two also dependant on what we could afford that cycle.  Its alot about timing- my doctor says that with the hcg shot we gain a little more control over the scheduling... Supposedly the egg lasts for about 24 hours and frozen sperm does not last the same as fresh sperm... I think that's why it takes alot of tries to get it!  Keep trying!!!

That book you mention sounds interesting- would you mind giving me the name?

When are you planning to cycle again? I will do one more clomid cycle and then move on to injectibles if I don't have anymore cysts- I already had one last cycle from the clomid!!! 


Best wishes!!!


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## Auggie

Hi Alex,

Good luck for your next cycle- hope you are third time lucky!!

Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hello All,
Auggie- I would be pleased to pass on the name of the book I mentioned...
It's called HELPING THE STORK: THE CHOICES AND CHALLENGES OF DONOR INSEMINATION.  Written by CAROL FROST VERCOLLONE, HEIDI MOSS, and ROBERT MOSS.
Carol was the Fertility Counsellor (psychologist, I believe) for the couple, Heidi & Robert who were successful with donor insemination in creating their family.
This was the first book I purchased when donor sperm was offered to us (along with the option of adoption).  I found it by researching the web.  This book was definitely my "best friend" for awhile (I hadn't hooked up with FF yet)....and I still revisit it- it is written from the heart.  I always welcome other book suggestions....and have quite the little library going at this stage. 

Thanks for the comments re: counts and # of inseminations.  I am away from home for the holidays right now..but will call the clinic on my return.
Another puregon round and donor sperm IUI is scheduled for Jan/05.....just waiting for my period.
How about you, Auggie?
Thanks for the encouragement....welcome any other input from others.
Take care, Gwendolyn


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## Gwendolyn

Alex-
Appreciate your sharing!
I'll be rooting for you and your DH and your 4th attempt in Feb!
The clinic apparently boosts us up to DIVF after 2 more attempts at DIUI with puregon injections.....I so hope we are lucky before then!
Best wishes, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

Thanks for the name of the book!  Are you starting meds on the 5th or doing the IUI on the 5th?  I have a scan on Wed. and if all okay, then I'll start another round of clomid for 5 days with a possible IUI around the 14th or 15th!  I'm excited but worried at the same time cause I have this nagging feeling about my scant AFs lately?  I read a few other posts you've submitted and it is as if you are saying the words right out of my mouth!  Keep the faith- we'll get there!!!! 

Best wishes for 2005!
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

HI Auggie....so glad to hear that my words ring so true for you....it is such a gift for me to know there is someone else out there who "gets" what I feel.  It's a great big hug to my soul- so thank-you.  I no longer feel as isolated as I use to. 
I am sorry to have confused you....in terms of the 5th- I am referring to the fact that this January 2005 will involve our 5th attempt at DIUI.  I have yet to get my period this month of January...but I suspect it will arrive VERY soon (later this week).  Then the clinic will likely tell me to begin the puregon shots on Day 5 after my 1st day of full flow.  It could very well work out that we both do IUI around the same time....would you mind checking in on this thread re: start dates.  We might end up a great support to each other during similiar 2 ww's.
What kind of scan are you having on Wed?  I did clomid on my earlier attempts at DIUI and there was no scanning for me....just waited for "Day 1" (first full-flow day) and then started clomid on the 5th to 10th day from my Day 1.
Appreciate the cheer to "keep the faith"....REALLY needed it.  Lately my growing anxiety has made sleeping very disruptive (and that's NOT helpful either!!!)
Anyway, I am sure we'll be in touch over FF.
Best wishes and take care, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

It would be great to be cycle buddies!!!!! I know that your support will be most needed then!!!! My scan tommorow is a baseline scan where they check to see if I have teeny follicles and no cysts.  I start off this way each time - first they do a scan and then I start the meds on Day 5.  then I usually do 3-4 more scans to check the size of my endometrium and the number of eggs and their size.  Even with all this scanning, I still have not managed a BFP so not sure if it is all necessary but it does make me feel better psychologically just knowing what is going on in there.  I'm assuming that you are now scanned with the injectibles?  Do you also do blood work?

I tried to look for the thread you mention but didn't know which board it is and I couldn't find it- I also did a general search...

I know what you mean about the sleeping, last night I woke up at 4:30 am and could not go back to sleep!  I know that each time it doesn't work, I get more and more anxious for the next time but as my doctor says, you cannot go by statistics alone.  He for one doesn't trust them too much because you can't always control all of the conditions under which they are made.  

Do you remember any side effects from the clomid?

Here's to a healthy AF for you shortly, a healthy cyle and a successful one!
Hugs
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hi Auggie....
I think my poor sleeping habits of late are effecting my ability to communicate through this message board!   My apologies!
When I asked if you wouldn't mind checking in with this thread re: start dates....I was trying to ask you if you would let me know through this particular thread ("Re: Donor IUI attempts? Help") and let me know when you do your upcoming IUI.  Sorry I am not expressing myself more clearly for you!

You are correct that I NOW do a vaginal ultrasound on the 5th day of puregon injections to check for follicles.  Last attempt- there were 2 "of good size" and 5 total.  Blood work was also taken on my 5th day of puregon injections.  Given that 2 "great-looking folicles" were present on the 5th day of puregon- they advised me to have one more injection (6th day of puregon) and then I injected the medication to make my body ovulate on the following day.....I remember that being a Sun. night and then DIUI was done on the morning of that coming Tues.  I sometimes wonder if that is too long of a wait to expect conception to occur 

I, myself, did not experience any side-effects of clomid (nor puregon, for that matter).  I felt very fortunate.

Though I do know that a friend of mine (attempting to have her 2nd....and trying for 6-8 months maybe) was prescribed clomid by her family dr. and she said she felt terrible on clomid and is reluctant to use it again.  SO I am not sure what to tell you??....I do believe that those who have experienced IF difficulties for a longer period of time, and/or who have serious fertility issues diagnosed can experience a higher sense of tolerance for physical symptoms/side-effects...after all, we get poked and prodded more than we care to admit!!!!  I think the friend I mentioned is struggling more with side-effects of clomid because she expected to get preganant as quickly as she did the 1st time (....her DH and her got the BFP for their son on their 2nd try!!!!!) ...and so at this point, she does not feel the same intense need to continue with clomid (and the side effects for her) when she has had a pregnancy  before and there is not (at least, at this point) a significant cause for IF concerns. 

The only thing I noticed with clomid is that when I got the BFN.....my periods were VERY light.  I am already light...so I didn't think it could get much lighter....but it did!  The nurse told me later that this is apparently a side-effect for SOME women....meaning that the "amount" of lining is compromised.
But, Auggie....we MUST NOT worry about that possibility right now because WE ARE GOING FOR THE GOLD FOR YOU......we are going for the BIG FAT POSITIVE!!!! 
Take care, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

Have just returned from an unexpected business trip and was offline for TOO long!

When you say 5th day of puregon - do you mean day 5 in your cycle or just the 5th time you inject?  I'm asking because if this cycle doesn't work (I am trying to be positive...but also need to plan ahead) then we are on to injectibles and I feel like I'm starting all over again in a new 'area' that I don't know much about.  I have done injectibles with ICSI but I'd be new to the timing of injectibles for IUI.  

As for the timings, I usually get inseminated 36 hours after I take the hcg shot to trigger ovulation.  One cycle, we tried two attempts, one at 12 hours after the shot and then another 24 hours after that (so at 36hrs.)  So you're timing sounds about right.  Is your clinic strict with hours?  Ie. do they want you in within a two hour time frame of the 36 hour mark?

Did you AF turn up?  What stage are you at?  My baseline scan was fine.  I've had my second scan which showed 2 follies on my right side (again- thought it might be my left side this time...) at 8 and 10mm.  My lining was quite thin though 4.4 but the same thing happened last time that it went back up to normal after I finished taking the Clomid.  You're really lucky that you don't get side effects.  I get side effects from everything- hcg, puregon, clomid- you name it... The same thing happened to me with my periods too- they were very light and I'm also lite usually too.

Well, I hope that you are well on your way in this cycle- I'm looking forward to your news... and YES we are going for the GOLD!!!!!!!!!!

Ciao-Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

HI Auggie!
I got the AF today (Mon. 10th).....1 week later than expected (stress)
Anyway, I called the clinic and they will advise me when to start the puregon injections.  I suspect I will begin on Day 5 like last time (if I remember correctly)....so looks like 1st injection will be on Jan. 15th and injections continue daily until vaginal ultrasound on Day 10....then the Dr assesses....and last time I did 1 more injection (6 injections total).  I'll let you know when I know.....the clinic and I kept missing each other today via phone.  Seem to recall the clinic inseminated me at 36 hours for my last time too (after taking ovulation med- hcg?)....they are very particular about the time for me to be there and "ready".  I have only ever had 1 insemination with all 4 IUI attempts in the past.
I am away overnight on business Tues night and back late Wed night ....so will catch up with you Thurs..
Can I ask what the thought is behind your starting with ICSI first and now trying IUI
Look forward to hearing from you!!!!


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

Yeah that your AF arrived and sorry it was late!  Doesn't Monday count as day 1 of your new cycle (so that day 5 would be 14th)?  I'm told to count day 1 from the first day of AF.  I went for a second scan yesterday and my lining is up from 4.4 to 6.4.  I know its not great but clomid does this to me-  last time it went up to 11.2 just after the hcg shot, so I'm hoping the same will happen this time.  My two follies have also grown to 12 and 13.5mm.  So I may be going in for the IUI around the 14th, 15th or 16th!! Yikes!  I'll be going in to the 2ww a few days ahead of you...but I'll be waiting for ya!

We have severe MF- my DH has a rare condition and so we had to go straight to ICSI when we first started on this journey.  All tests for me so far have come up normal.  After our first failure with ICSI (chemical) my DH started bringing up the issue of donor sperm.  I was adamant to keep trying with ICSI even though the expense was becoming great for us.  My DH was concerned with passing along his condition to his offspring, etc and frankly was tired of 'failing'.  This last part was explained to me by a guy friend who told me that for a man - the sense of repeated failure can be quite devastating.  After our third failed attempt with ICSI and the one FET, I took quite some time out to work out the whole donor thing in my head and now I'm really fine with it, so we are doing the DIUI's until we get pregnant or they find something wrong with me that might make us change our plan of action...

Hoping this one is the one for both of us!  Have a good trip and 'talk' to you on Thurs.
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hey Auggie....
Well, it seems that you are more "on the ball" than me when talking about my own treatment  ....as you are so correct (I obviously miscounted).  Anyway- puregon injection start on Jan 14th....will do the vaginal ultrasound on the 19th to check out the follies...and if all goes as last time, I'll be doing IUI around the 21st!  I WISH YOU THE ULTIMATE IN BABY-DUST as you embark on DIUI this Fri (I will think of you especially as my DH gives me my injection! hahahahaha!)

I am intrigued by this measurement of lining....never had it done for me. hmmmmm

That is rather impressive that your DH brought up donor sperm....he is an extaordinary guy.

I do hear you when you mention the notion of repeated failure for men.  My DH and I had a big talk tonight (totally unexpected) after I returned home from business trip and he more or less indicated that the increased anxiety and "anger" that he has been feeling as of late (since Dec he has been very "edgey"....like me, I suppose...but he is usually the more "solid and peaceful" one of of us 2)....anyway, he feels it is linked with battling his decreasing sense of hope and lack of confidence since 4th failure (in Dec).  He starts to question everything and the emotional pain he felt at diagnosis of azoospermia comes racing back.  He finds himself wondering about a "child-free marriage"....and it just gets messy for him (and me for that matter!!)....when really it is just that he wants to run away from the pain in his core as he truly wants to have a family with me.

ANyway....look forward to our next contact!  I AM THINKING OF YOU with lots of HOPE!  Take care, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

Your post made me smile- thanks for all the support and encouragement!! Depending on my scan results this evening, my doc will decide whether to trigger me tonight (so I then go in for IUI on Sat.morn) or tommorow evening and do the IUI then on Sunday.  I think I prefer tonight because I'm afraid that I will ovulate spontaneously as last month which makes calculating the timing of IUI more difficult.  

They check the lining as part of the SOP for the scans.  They most probably check yours too but just don't tell you about it 'cause its fine!  If it wasn't okay- I'm sure they would tell you... I ask for my number because I am low on progesterone some months and now with the clomid it definately thins out my lining- which is a known side effect in some women.  BUT, I'm learning (the hard way) that sometimes too much information is NOT a good thing and just adds to my stress!!! Even when my doctor says that everything is fine, I fret now because of the 3 icsi's I'm so used to having so much detail about my cycles.  My new doctor says he wishes that he could erase the memory of the last 3 icsi's so I wouldn't get so worked up.  I wish he could do that too!!!!  On the other hand, now that I know that I have an issue with my lining, I can do things like drink raspberry leaf tea and do the femoral massage which has helped me build it back up before IUI! 

Yeah, my DH is pretty mature with some issues.  He is also anxious to get a family started and in his naive way thinks that since no problem has been found with me as of yet, then doing DIUI will give us results more quickly! (he's a problem solver so tends to go for the perceived quickest way to success...) Wrong! Even though the doctor told him it could take up to 6-7 tries, he still thinks -'why is this so difficult and taking so long?'  On the other hand, he does NOT deal with his emotions too well, so even though I know he is OK with the DS issue, there are still issues that he has not worked out.  He also has been aware of his problem since he was 18 years old so I think he has been milling this issue around in his mind for quite some time?!!  If your husband was just recently told (and I'm talking few years time) then, I think it might still be 'fresh'.  It is GREAT that your DH talks about what he is experiencing- it is so very healthy!!!  My DH just bottles it up...which causes lots of anxiety coming out in other ways... like getting upset when the garbage bag breaks before he gets to the bin, etc.  This IF is certainly a trial on a marriage and our selves but HOPEFULLY it'll all be worth it SOONEST!!!!!!!!!!!!  

My DH is also now talking about a child free marriage and thinks that I should start getting my head around this one a little bit and not be so 'obsessed'!!!! ) You are so perceptive in seeing that they are just wishing to run away from it all and masking what they really would like!! My DH is just the same!  He prefers just not to deal with the issue and can 'convince' himself quite nicely that it will be okay for us NOT to have children.  But, then when I see him at a party (the other night) and watch him looking at a father/daughter relationship (some of our friends), I KNOW he is kidding himself!!!!!!!!

I've decided that if this cycle doesn't work, I will take a break for a few months, detox my body and mind, go back home to visit my family in North America and then start with injectibles (we will need time to work out all the insurance permissions, etc...anyway...) I was sooooooooooo convinced that it worked last time that my let down was tremendous and I'm just now trying to not let that happen again!!  We'll see...but as for YOU, I'll be thinking of you too this Friday and am wishing you a good start to your cycle AND THAT a super duper strong +++++++++++ will shine your way this time around!!!!!  

Are you doing accupuncture or supplements or anything like that?

Be well - 'chat' to you soon!
Auggie


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## Fliss

Hi girls!  I just spotted your posts and I hope you don't mind if I add a comment.  

This time last year I was exactly where you are ... so desperate to get a BFP, and in utter despair each time a DIUI cycle failed.  DH and I did 5 cycles without drugs (except the HCG shot 36 hours prior to the one insemination) ... all with at least one good follicle, but all BFN.  

Then I tried Clomid, which turned me into a she-devil and killed off my 3 developing follies without eggs being released.  We changed to use a different donor, clutching at straws really, but another unstimulated cycle gave us a BFN.

Finally we did one with Puregon, and yet another donor (for luck!).  Two follies developed and we finally got our BFP!!  We're now 35 weeks with twins, and utterly delighted!

So, it really CAN happen after lots of attempts, don't give up hope!

And by the way, we looked back at the donor statistics after getting our BFP, and the one we used the first 5 times had been used up and not achieved a single pregnancy.  So, I don't know what your clinic have to offer, (or you may be using a known donor) but I'd say it's worth using a different donor if you haven't already.  Our choice was limited, but we were less strict matching DH's characteristics for the second and third donors.

Anyway, I've gone on too long, but hope this gives you a bit of hope!!  Wishing you lots and lots of luck and heaps of babydust,

Fliss x


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## Auggie

Hi Fliss,
Thanks so much for posting your story!! It certainly does give me hope!! We have changed our donor on our last attempt as the one we used to use was giving us very low numbers (less than 10 million although 95-100% motility) I am also thinking of changing again as soon as these last few vials are used up of our 'new' donor.  I'm not sure if I can get pregnancy achievement rates from the donor but I will try.  Do you remember what counts and motility you had for the IUI that finally worked? Our last cycle was 26 million with 89% motility which my clinic was not too happy about (the motility that is-they were happy with the count...)

CONGRATULATIONS and best wishes!!
Auggie


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## jojo29

Hi Fliss,
I saw your note and have to say thank you for sharing your story.  DH and I have had 5 failed attempts at DIUI natural cycles as we were not offered stimulated ones, in fact I only learnt about stimulated cycles on this website. Our last BFN was in Dec and we have been spending time on what our next movement should be.  I am really nervous about injecting drugs as I am the kind of person who doesn't even like taking a pill for a headache, I have little trust in what drugs do to your body.  However we have been unsure whether to have any more DIUIs as we assumed after 5 that they were never going to work.  BUT your note has given us hope that we should perhaps try a few more before we move on to the next stage of treatment.  Did you feel it wasn't going to happen at any stage during your cycles?  I always thought it would happen the next time and never really felt that disappointed when it didn't work as I have friends who are trying naturally and it hasn't happened for them overnight!  But when no. 5 failed I did start to think o my god, what now?  
Thanks again for sharing that and I think we may go ahead and find a privite clinic to try again (previous 5 have been on NHS).
Good luck
Jojox


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## BunBun

Sorry it's a bit late in posting but this is what my clinic told me about the number of attempts before getting a success with DIUI was between 4 & 7. Personally I've had 4 attempts 2 on just clomid, 1 on clomid & merional with resulted in a BFP but m/c and the last attempt in October was on clomid & menopur,which gave me strange results but ended up being classed as either bfn or m/c (really too long to explain). After the first 2 bfn we did find out that there was a change of donor so whether that helped I don't know.
Goodluck to you all.


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## Auggie

Hi JoJo,

Have you thought about doing Clomid instead before trying injectibles?  If you ovulate normally, it is used to stimulate the ovaries to produce a few more follies (and hopefully eggs) to up the chances a bit more in our favour.  It is not for every woman and does have side effects but I've recently heard about a drug called Femara which does the same as clomid without the many side effects.  I am like you- I didn't even take so much as an aspirin for a headache and here I am one year and a bit later, having put many types of drugs into my system!!  I can't say that I'm thrilled about this and that my body did not suffer side effects but I have to say that it wasn't as bad as I initially thought it would be!  I did find that accupuncture offset the negative effects of the drugs....

I think in our case (DIUI) sperm count and motility play a big role too.  I heard of a lady that changed the type of sperm she ordered from IUI ready to ICI ready (so that her lab only washed it once) and her counts went from 10  million to 50 million and she got pregnant on that cycle.  She had also upped her clomid dose and produced 4 follies instead of 2 and that also increased the odds for her.

Keep trying!!!! You are so very right in saying that couples who try the 'old fashioned' way take many cycles also and they have the added benefit of fresh vs. frozen sperm and they can make a few more attempts than us.  We basically get 1 possibly two shots each month!

BunBun, I have also heard the same that 4-7 attempts is usual for IUIs but I heard that these stats are WITH meds (clomid or injectibles)? My doctor told me about a new study that was done showing that after 9 attempts, an overwhelming number of couples do succeed...

Sorry to hear about your m/c's and I hope that you get your angel(s) soon!


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## alex28

Hi Fliss, Jo Jo, Aggie and Gwen
I too have had 2 attempts at DI both neg and then 2 IUIs with clomid boht neg and although i dont really count the first IUI as timing was out - i ov too early - i knew it but still wanted to try!

YOu have also certainly given me hope in that i was thinking of jumping straight to DIVF but as they think nothing wrong with me apart from not ov which the clomid has sorted they said to have 6 goes at it.

I am due af on 21st so will hopefully have iui done early feb.  

Good luck for you all this month.

Alex xx


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## jojo29

Dear Auggie,
I didn't even know you could do such a thing, you see I feel ill-informed about what treatment is on offer.  Maybe I should do more research myself but sometimes I worry that I am being too scientific.  Can you tell me how it works on Clomid? I ovulate absolutely normally, my periods happen on the same day every month with no problems, all tests show I have no problems.  I believe that if my dh didn't have the sperm problem getting pregnant would be achievable but I don't feel that positive with donor sperm. It is so frustrating.  What would I need to do with the Clomid if it is not injected?

Many thanks for your advice
Jojox


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## BunBun

JoJo29 I'm much the same as you ie no problems with ovulation etc & also couldn't understand why I was given clomid to start with but was informed that it was given to boost my chances of having mature folicles etc. hence improving our chance of pregancy. The clomid was taken as tablets.


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## Gwendolyn

Hi ALL!  Good to hear from you Auggie, Fliss, Bun Bun, Jo and Alex!!
Fliss- your story is what we all habg onto!  Thanks for taking the time to share HOPE!!!

I started puregon Fri evening....and yes, Auggie...I have tried acupuncture (mostly for relaxation and attempts to decres=ase anxiety)....reminds me that I should make an appointment SOON!  As for supplements...nothing too fancy- just vitamins and folic acid.
I, too, was over confident last time (nov 2004) and thought that puregon and a new donor would bring us a BFP!  I was devastated!  I am intrigued about your comment regarding a return to North America to visit with family and potentially begin injectibles (should the BFN haunt you this time...knock on wood!!)...as I am writing form North America!!!
I followed up on getting the stats on sperm count and motility ....and apparently we have 89 million count and 40% motility and this is considered "to be expected" at our clinic...what do you all think!  I am a little worried when I read 80-100% motility for some of you!!!! HELP (Fliss)!!!  Is it possible that units of measurement are different between UK and North America

I was told that the clomid (I used it for 3 attempts...it is taken orally for a few days, Jojo) was more for ENSURING that you ovulate and if you do not have any problems with ovulation (like me) it is more about assisting in focussing and pinpointing the time of ovulation.  I was told there may be a risk of more follicles forming....but very small (unlike with puregon which is most definitely super ovulation and likely to involve more than one follicle!).  This was what I was told anyway.

This whole concept of taking drugs- whether orally or injecting- is appalling for me.  I VERY, VERY rarely used a pill to address even a headache!!  It is very humbling and challenges one's sense of values....I also occassionally begin to jworry about long term effects for me...or our future child!

Anyway, good luck to all.  I am VERY, VERY, VERY sorry to hear that a BFP led to a MC, Bun Bun.....I cannot even begin to comprehend the emotional pain you must have felt. I appreciate you sharing your grief.....it is certainly a feeling many at FF can relate to.  I hope FF helps you to find a sense of peace from time to time.
I, like you- Jojo....believe that without the male factor infertility ....things would be different for me.  Of course, I do not blame my DH for something that is out of his control.  
My mother got pregnant twice using birth control and my older sister says that her DH needed to get "snipped" because if he looked at her- she would get pregnant again ...and they did not want 4  children.  Then I have a younger sister who has a severe heart defect and was told that she would never be able to carry a child without putting her own life at severe risk....she is on so many meds that it was suspected that she would never become pregnant (plus she has irregular periods!!).....BUT OH NO....she got pregnant last Sept. (DEFINITELY unplanned with her DH) and it was when she suffered the miscarriage that she realized she was pregnant!  UNBELIEVABLE and IRONIC, eh?  She said that the hardest part of it all was not the miscarriage for her...it was telling me....as she knows that we so desperately want a child and are not getting pregnant!  

ANYWAY-
Thanks for ALL the +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ energy and I wish it all back to you...each and everyone!
Gwendolyn


----------



## BunBun

Hi Gwendolyn,
Here's a recent link to sperm count & motility in case you've missed it http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,19601.0.html
Wishing you all the best,
BunBun


----------



## Auggie

Hi Fliss, Bun Bun, JoJo and Alex

So nice to see so much activity on this post!!

JoJo- clomid is taken orally either on day 2 to 6 or day 5-9. Then you stop taking it. It is given in doses starting at 50mg and going up to 200mg. I was taking it day 5-9 and 100mg. This was my third cycle on it. The first cycle I had 3 follies on my left- two ovulated and the 3rd became a cyst (it was noticed on my baseline scan in the second cycle) but it was reabsorbed by my body just a few days after we noticed it. The second cycle I made 2 follies on my right side and this time, I have 2 on my right and 1 on my left. The one on my left was only 17.5mm so we are NOT expecting that it will rupture with the other two- it it becomes a cyst, I'm hoping that it will get reabsorbed again but who knows?? I've heard that it can also prolong your luteal phase so it sometimes is given for those who have luteal phase defect. I've recently started reading about Femara. I've been thinking about maybe one more cycle with Femara but I have to research it more. Clomid made my lining thin so my doc is not too happy with it...

This very nice lady also posted a "Guide for beginners in IUI" on the IUI board, don't know if you've seen but it gives a comprehensive overview of the whole procedure....
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,16321.0.html

Gwen- I was thinking of you while I was getting basted yesterday! How was the first shot? I ended up having the hcg shot at 10pm on Thurs. and my doc decided he wanted to try 2 inseminations this month. So I went in yesterday morning around 11am for the first 'basting'. I woke up at 3am and then again at am with twinges so I believed that I ovulated. (you usually ovulate 24-36 hours after hcg shot anyway...)

This morning I went for a scan because we were curious to see if the third follie - the 17mm one ruptured also or whether we were looking at a cyst. Well, much to my shock and surprise I still hadn't ovulated!!!! I was almost 36 hours past hcg shot. Not only that but the follies and endo lining had not grown from the day before!! The clinician told me that this means the follies were ready for bursting sometime today. I freaked because I got worried about timing. The problem was that the sperm had already be defrosted and prepared at the lab and although it was safe in the incubator, I had to do the procedure today!! My doctor thought it was strange that I hadn't ovulated but was sure it would happen by tonight. Anyway, I got basted about 2 hours later than we initially planned and this time the count was the best ever - 40mill with 95% motility. (Your counts sound really good, it sounds as if the lab does not process the sperm? Basically the processing is what weeds out the dead, slow ones so if your lab were to wash your sample you would get a lower count with higher motility but I think it really makes no difference as long as there are enough in there and they are healthy!!)

Anyway, I'm worried because this cycle has been really expensive for us with the two inseminations, yesterday's being a waste and the sad thing is that I'm not sure if I've ovulated yet?? I started getting bloating and twinges at the clinic before the procedure and then again around 3pm and then around 5pm on both my left and right sides. At one point I thought I did ovulate but then I started feeling twinges again on my right side a fe hours later so now I'm not sure and TOTALLY CONFUSED!!! I guess there is nothing to do now anyhow so I should stop stressing myself but I'm finding that really hard!! I'm really tempted to call my doc and ask him if I can go to the hospital for a scan but I'm too embarrased as he'll think I'm totally insane!!

I said that I would not hold out much hope for this cycle but then I got a little excited yesterday but I guess I should go back to being very realistic about this one. If I have ovulated then the chances are higher, if I haven't yet then by the time I do, I'm afraid the sperm will be dying off My embryologist who prepares the sperm told me that it could live for days because she has left sperm in the incubator for up to seven days and come back to find them still moving about (not as potent of course but still moving!) BUT, everything I've read states that sperm live up to 12 hours, maybe 24 at most?!!

Anyway, I guess I'm officially starting the 2ww- am looking forward to having you join me soon! I'm going to try NOT to think about things too much and plan our possible upcoming trip - maybe that will keep my mind off things and realistic!! WOW, where in NA are you from? I am from Canada but we will also be visiting New York as we still have friends and family there too...

Happy injecting Gwen, Alex - happy AF waiting - I hope it comes right when you want it too and good luck with your next cycle. Good luck to Bun Bun and JoJo!!!!
Warmest wishes ladies!
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hi Everyone!
Sorry I have not been a constant on FF this last week.....got a bit of a bug  (sor throat, stuffed up, generally fatigue...) and I am just exhausted at the end of the day after I dragged my body through a day at work (I do not check FF while at work...just a bit concerned about "big brother" and who sees what).  ANyway, trying to nurse myself with some tea and thought I would check-in!

Auggie.....I am so sad that you are facing disappointment and anxiety about how the whole recent basting went.  I would so do the same....though, I am sure this doesn't make you feel any better!  This whole treatment process totally makes a person a walking mental health case, I swear!  It's like the more information we receive through scanning.....the whackier and "freake -out" the whole process becomes.  I am going to have faith that those sperm are good and defrosted....and while some may be "charging a head"...others may choose to take a strong, yet more "leisurely stroll", through you....and either way, an emerging follicle will get fertilized!!!!!!!  It probably sounds like I have an active imagination....but you know, Auggie.....visualization has its place, I think!
As for calling your Dr and mediacl team....my philosophy is do whatever you must do to feel less insane!!!  Pride and concerns about what "others" must think has no room in your soul's drive for peace!  I am sure that I am considered a bit "high maintenance" from the nurse that inseminates me....but hey, this is a crazy ride I (and DH!) are on!  Plus, I know that I have a responsibility in my health!  I also think it is even more difficult for health providers when the patient works in the health service industry (which I do!!)
Auggie, You sound very intuned with your body and all its twinges....I find the drugs cloud everything for me.
The 2WW is torture for me as well......of course, as my Counsellor says (in a nutshell).....no sense worrying- as whatever has happened....HAS HAPPENED!  Sometimes I try to focus on doing and thinking whatever I need to do for my body and think for my peace of mind that relates to fostering a good home for a baby to grow.

As for me....I did a vaginal ultrasound on the morning of the 19th and they are watching 5 follicles that still need to grow a bit so I did another shot of puregon, and another one for the 20th and then I go in for another ultrasound on the 21st....they will advise after that.  Basically, I think I am getting inseminated this weekend....maybe 23rd.  

Anyway...I am thinking of everyone...and wishing well.  I, too, am so pleased that so much activity and support is happening on this post!! 

I, too, am from Canada in N.A!!!

Look forward to hearing form everyone!  Sending lots and lots of heartwarming thoughts!! Take care of yourselves, Gwendolyn


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## Auggie

Hi Gwendolyn,

I'm so sorry to hear that you are not feeling well!!! I hope it is not something serious and that you will feel better soonest!!!!! Wow, a fellow Canadian!!! Great- I'm from TO. and I also work in health care- but not on the medical side- this is too funny!!

Well, my story continues... on the day after I got inseminated, I still had some OV like cramping on my right side.  The pain got more intense as the day went on so in the end I finally did call my doctor and he suggested that I go in for a scan the next morning (as that day was Sunday) Anyways, my scan revealed that of the 3 follies- only one ovulated! We did not really expect the one on my left to rupture as is was only 17.5 but I did expect the two on my right side to do so.  Well, only one did and the sharp pain I was getting was from the second one that did not rupture.  It was shrinking.  My doc believes it was an empty follicle and not a cyst.  Don't know if I should be worried about this or not as my FSH has been climbing slowly? Anyway, am trying not to worry until after I get a result from this cycle.  I am even doing some visualisations which I find are really helping me chill out about everything... I'm trying to be positive and realistic at the same time (if that is actually possible...) Afterall, couples trying naturally to get pregnant normally only get one egg and if I'm correct that those twinges around 3 and 5 pm were me ovulating then the timing would not be so bad and the sperm was good so there is some hope... If it doesn't work this time around, I will take a few months break to detox and rest my ovaries, I've been asking alot of them this past 1 1/2 years!!

Wow, 5 follies for you- EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!! Best of luck for your scan tommorow and your basting this weekend!!! I'll be thinking of you and ready to welcome you to the 2ww!!!!!! HOPE THIS TIME LUCKY ONE FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hi Auggie!
I just think it's a nasty cold bug that is plaguing me....but I am not exactly thrilled about feeling so under the weather when I am about to get basted!  It's like I need to feel that I have all the BEST odds going on inside my body...on all accounts!!! I don;t like having a compromised immune system to battle...along with everything else!!  haha!
ANyway, I trust that you received my personal e-mail to you...so weird that we have discovered common grounds as Canadians!  Who ever knew?  Of course, it really doesn't matter where you are from ....there is so much validation on FF no matter where your feet are planted (or have been planted)!!
Glad to hear you still sounding reasonably positive about everything....after all- IT ONLY TAKES ONE EGG AND ONE SPERM to make a baby!!
As for my current status.....the 5 follies were in the range to be "watched"....we'll see what they discover as firm "potentials" at Fri morning's ultrasound!
I'll keep you posted!  Take care....I am cheering you on from your home soil!  Take care, Gwendolyn


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## Gwendolyn

Hi Everyone (again!)
Just a little update and inquiry....
I had my 2nd vaginal ultrasound on Fri morning.....have been taking puregon shots for 7 days.  Anyway...seems that my body and the drugs are having a bit of a party because the nurse tells me after the ultrasound that she'll consult with the Dr as I have a LOT of follicles going and there is a possibility that my DIUI for this round may be cancelled because there are "too many follicles...and you wouldn't want to have 6 kids, would you?" (no- true enough....but one- or even two- would be nice, thank-you....and hey- call me crazy, I'm aiming for knowing that I can get pregnant at this point!  )
Anyway, the real truth is I do know where they are coming from ....but by the time I headed to work, I was majorly "freaking out" that this round was a complete waste of time!!  
Anyway, the Dr reviewed and said no puregon shot for Fri night....for me to come in Sat morning for ANOTHER vaginal ultrasound and we'll see what's going on....maybe I will be triggered for ovulation Sat..  So I am feeling BETTER about the process (thus far)....but the thing is that as much as I have mega-follies....they are apparently not at the "right size" ....but they don't really want to have too many follies get close to the "right size" given the numbers!  What a whirlwind and rollarcoaster!  I feel like some kind of exquisite cocktail is going on inside....not sure if it will be delicious or a disaster!!
Any one else have this happen....where a round of IUI was cancelled due to too many follies?  (I probably shoudl check out the IUI thread)
Anyway....in the meantime, the nurse says to me: "if you were an IVF patient, this would be a great round"....so then I say in desperation: "well, instead of cancelling this round of opportunity, can I be switched to IVF??"  So then she tells me that "oh no, if your file was just crossing my desk today for IVF....it would be a SIX MONTH WAIT!!...as there are no spots now". 
!!!!!! 
I had no idea of this wait and stupidly thought that as a IUI patient...I may get "preference"" .....silly, silly, silly me!!!  So this just enhanced my anxiety because I have been told that they recommend me trying DIUI 2 more times (that includes current round) and then they are switching me to IVF (if I am interested....and I am interested in a having a child...so YES, I am interested!!)  I just didn't realize the wait and this freaks me out a bit!!!  It doesn't help that I am turning 34 in a month and I always thought I would have 1 or 2 kids by now.....so to wait until I would almost be 35 for IVF is scary for my mind!!!
OK....so that's the venting for me tonight!!!!  Wish me luck for this round of DIUI to be a "GO"....and BFP! 
How is everyone else out there? Fliss, BunBun, Jojo, Alex & Auggie
Eager to hear!  Take care, Gwendolyn


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## alex28

Hi Gwendolyn
I do hope your cycle is not cancelled, it would be so frustrating.

I am on day 29 and still waiting for AF to arrive, with clomid i am a 28 dayer and without a 31 ish dayer so not on clomid this month so we will see what happens.


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## jojo29

Hi Gwendolyn and everyone else,

I am still waiting for my repeat smear as my first one came back unreadable - very frustrating as it took NHS 9 weeks to inform me of this!  I have decided to have the repeat done privately as they can get the result back in 2 weeks (I should have done this in the first instance, not sure what I was thinking..!!) clinic will not carry out any IUIs until I have the smear result back.  The test is Tuesday so I should be fit to start IUIs in February, hopefully...

How's everyone else's IUIs going?
Jojox


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## Auggie

Hi Ladies,

It can happen!!!  I just found out a few hours ago that I got a BFP!! I'm still in shock and of course I'm not out of the woods as many things can go wrong, I wanted to come on board and say LADIES, IT CAN HAPPEN and keep trying!!!! 

I was convinced that this cycle was a no go.  Out of the 3 follies that grew, only one ovulated and I had major pains for 3 days after the IUI.  I was so sure that I was not pregnant that I even had some champagne at our company's annual sales celebration!!  I also danced (and I mean jump up and down...) that night which I never would have done if I thought there was any hope. 

I had breast twinges and pelvic twinges on Sunday and I thought okay- this could be good but then on Monday- I had nothing- absolutely no symptoms and on Tuesday I started getting really bad AF cramps and just felt certain that AF would show up even earlier than normal.  Anyway, she didn't and hopefully won't! I also had to work really long hours and I travelled for a short business trip so you could imagine my shock when I got the call!!!

What I think was different with this cycle was the sperm count and timing of the IUI.  On my first IUI, we went natural and the sperm count was around 8-9million with a high percentage of motility.  On my second try, we used clomid, I made two eggs and the sperm count was still around 8-9 million.  On my third try we changed donor clinics and the count was 26 million with 89% motility but I ovulated spontaneously so we may have gotten the timing wrong- but I did feel sure during that 2ww that it had worked!  On this cycle, I was on clomid again, grew 3 follies- only 1 ruptured but the count was 45 million with 95%  motility.  I'm not sure about the timing but I do believe that the count had something to do with it.  

So, ladies, if at all possible, maybe it is worth insisting on high counts?- if you can.  I know alot of clinics don't like us interferring ..but at the end of the day we are the ones going through the process... We used two vials this last time so even though it was more expensive- my DH was actually complaining about the cost this time...

Gwen, how are you and how's it going?  I'm getting a bit concerned - did you get my reply message?

Jojo- did you get your test results back?  Best wishes for your IUI in February.

Alex28 I hope your AF turned up and you are well into your next cycle...Will you do clomid this time?

BunBun, Fliss- how are you?

Be well ladies, keep the faith....!!!!!! 
Auggie


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## alex28

FAN BLOODY TASTIC NEWS AUGGIE!!!

You must be thrilled!!!

My AF came yesterday (thurs) so started on clomid today for the next 5 days, then am going to try the cough mixture and then DIUI hopefully in about 2 weeks.

Fingers crossed to everyone else and like Auggie says "it can happen"

Well done again i am soooo pleased for you 

apologies but my smilies dont work so cant give you a hug or anything!


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## Gwendolyn

Hi ALL!!!!!
It's been awhile for me ....as this last week proved to be rather eventful for my DH and I!
First things first:
CONGRATULATIONS AUGGIE!!!!!!!  I AM SO HAPPY TO HEAR THIS NEWS....AND IT PROVES AS A BEACON OF HOPE TO THE REST OF US!!!!! 
(Please note, Auggie, that I did respond to your personal message....though it seems it did not arrive to your inbox!  I have since sent another 2.)

Jan. 22nd proved to be a beginning of another fertility adventure for DH and I.  It was confirmed that my body had grown too many follicles with the puregon...and Drs were not prepared to do IUI.
Nevertheless, they did offer IVF.....and "converted" me immediately.  It was a bit of a weird feeling...as all I could think is that means another woman lost the spot for IVF perhaps because her puregon cycle did not go well (not enough follies??)....after all, they had said it would be a 6 month wait for a woman to go IVF.  I felt so lucky...but very overwhelmed!!!  Anyway, after a zillion consents and explanations.....I was triggered the evening of the 21st and 8 follicles were retrieved on the 24th and by the 25th, 7 were fertilized.  On the 27th, they put 2 embryos back in...but none were left that were strong eneough to freeze.  No worries...I want THESE 2 in me to work!!! 
So now I am wishing, and hoping and praying to all Gods possible!!  My pregnancy test is scheduled for Feb. 10th!!!  How will I ever contain the rollarcoaster of emotions  You want to be hopeful....you really do!!!....but as Auggie indicated on her 2 week wait....it's a "mixed bag" of bartering with yourself!!!

Alex: I am cheering you on and hoping that clomid is kind to you and your IUI even KINDER  !

Jojo: I am hoping Feb bring us both what we want!!!

BunBun & Fliss: Thinking of you!

Auggie: CONGRATULATIONS to the Nth degree!  It is so nice to hear good news!...especially since following your story before the BFP!!!

Nice to reconnect!!  Best wishes, Gwendolyn


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## alex28

Fab news Gwen - i am a great believer in fate and things happening for a reason so wish you lots of love and hope for the next 2 weeks.

alex xx


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## Auggie

Hi Gwen,

THIS IS FANTASTIC - I'm so happy that you were able to get converted!!!!!!! I too think this is a good sign and have everything crossed for you!!!!!  I did get your last two messages and I've replied to you... 

Alex, Great that AF showed and BEST WISHES for this IUI- I'll keep checking on ya!

I have my last beta tomorow morning- don't get the results until the evening so for sure I'll be a wreck until the phone call.  I'm concerned that they will stop doubling even though I still have symptoms they are not as 'strong' as before- but I'll just have to wait and see I guess.  One thing I know for sure is that the worrying does not really stop - it just changes!!!

Big Hugs ladies- lots of baby dust your way........
Auggie


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## Guest

Hello to all of you. This is my first post! I am currently in the 2ww with my 2nd diui / clomid 50 mg. Do any of you get ultrasounds the day or two before iui? I was wondering how to gage success based on follie size? This cycle I only had 2 follies. one 18.5 & one 21.5. Today I am 9 dpo. I tested this am & it was bfn. It may be too soon.......? I think its great to have eachother for support. I love the success stories! Also do any of you know the post wash counts used in your iui's? My last was 13 mil.


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## Auggie

Hi MeShel,

Yes, I did do ultrasounds actually on the day before and the day of ultrasound.  That was because on my previous cycle, I ovulated spontaneously on day 12 and we wanted to avoid missing it this time!  I don't believe you can gage success based on follie size but I'm not in the medical profession so I'm not sure but your numbers sound really good.  Yes, 9DPO is too early to test.  I tested on Day 10 got a BFN - but for some reason dropped the test in my work bag and when I found it again that evening, I saw the absolute teeniest line.  Even two days later, the line was just barely there.  It wasn't until day 14 where I got a good line.  Hang in there!!  I know its hell sometimes but its great that we have this forum!

Auggie


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## Guest

Auggie,
Thanks so much for the response. Congradulations on your BFP! Do you remember the post wash counts, & how many follies you had on your bfp cycle? 
Thanks again!
MeShel


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## Auggie

Hi MeShel,

I was taking clomid 100mg.  I made 3 follies, one was smallish at 17.5 so we didn't really expect it to ovulate but the other two were 20 and 21mm BUT I ovulated only 1 even though I had 10,000 IU hcg shot.  The second large follie ended up being empty!  So it does only take one!  My post wash count was very high this time around- it was 45 mill (we use 2 vials usually but this time the 2nd vial was more potent than usual).... but I think the timing plays a huge role....

Best wishes to you for a BFP!!!!!!!!!! Let us know what happens...
Take care
Auggie


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## Guest

Hi Auggie,
Thanks again for the nice responses! I have a very faint 2nd line today, 11 dpo. Im excited, but in disbelief! Im 12 days past the hcg shot, so I hope its real. I have the sensitave tests that detect 20 hcg. I will let you know!
MeShel


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## Auggie

Hi MeShel,

That's just GREAT!!! Are you testing again tommorow?  If it gets even a little darker, then you're on your way!!!!!!!  I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!!! Lots of baby dust your way!!

Auggie


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## BunBun

Congratulations Auggie on your  that's great news.
All the best to MeShel hopefully that line will keep getting darker.
How are things going Gwendolyn? Glad you were able to switch to IVF.
Alex28 how are you getting on?
Hope everyone else is well.
I'm on cd8 & have my 1st scan tomorrow so hoping that there will be some nice follies present - having a rough time with injections this go so haven't been up to much.


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## alex28

HI all

On CD11 now and started LH testing today.  It was a neg but from looking at the 2 lines wont be long till they are the same colour.  Had a bit of creamy cm today also so here goes again!!

Hope everyone one else is doing ok.


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## Auggie

BEST OF LUCK BunBun and Alex!!!!!!!!
I'll keep checking for your news.....

I'm feeling like I'm 'losing' my symptoms so am depressed today.  don't have a good feeling but only time will tell...

Hugs,
Auggie


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## alex28

Hi Auggie 
from what i have read lots of women feel that way or feel that AF is coming- the symptons are very similar i hear.
You will be fine honey - but maybe call your nurse to have a chat - it will make you feel better i am sure.


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## Guest

Hi Auggie & all ttc gal's!
Well....the line is still very light in color, but it is a tad darker than yesterday! I will keep you all posted. I guess I will have the beta test Monday or Tues. This is 12 dpo for me so I will know more soon. I have had a really bad taste in my mouth for the past four or five days. Also I am very sleepy. Other than that I have no symptoms.
Auggie, try not to worry. They say that each pregnancy is differant from the last. Have you had the beta test? I have a good feeling that all is just fine.
Baby dust to all! ..........go follies go!
MeShel


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## Auggie

Thanks Alex and MeShel for the support- it is really appreciated!!!!!! 

MeShel, it also took a few days for my line to get dark enough but the fact that it got a little darker is really good news!!!!! I'll keep checking on ya!  Are you on progesterone support?

Gwen, how are things going? You're almost towards the end of your wait!!!!!!!!!

Best wishes ladies!!!!!!!!! Lots of baby dust!!!!!!!!!
Hugs 
Auggie


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## Gwendolyn

Hi ALL!
Thanks for the inquiries to how I am!!!  Appreciate the thoughtfulness!  I am hanging in until Feb. 10th...test day!  I honestly just want to go to bed and wake up on that day!!!!!  I am beside myself with anticipation!!!
My DH has been fiddling with the computer at home....hence, compromising my time on FF.
I have symptoms that I cannot ascertain very clearly....firstly, because they seem to be like PMS....and secondly, I am on enough hormonal drugs that I am told nothing can truly be defined until test days!  I freaked out a bit last week because I found myself eating a ton of chocolate....which is what I do for PMS.....but also for STRESS! haha
Wish and pray to the Baby God and/or Angels for me!!!
Best wishes to all, Gwendolyn


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## Guest

Hi Auggie & all,
Well..... I went in this am for the hcg blood test! The results only took 2 hours to receive. My hcg blood level is 61 @ 13 dpo. Does anyone have any idea if thats a good #? The nurse said that the first number does not mean much, its comparing the # 48 hours later. I am not taking progesterone or any other med's.
How do you feel today Auggie?
Baby dust to each of you!! I'm checking the board daily!!! Waiting for more good news! +++ It's contagious!!

MeShel


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## Auggie

Hi MeShel,

Congratulations!!!! Yes, it is what the number will do in the next 48 -72 hours that is more important but my clinic counts anything above 20 as positive!!!!! 

Looking forward to chatting about 'complaints and symptoms'!

I'm feeling better today thanks for asking- I had a long chat with my doctor and he reassured me that everything I was feeling or not feeling was normal for this stage.  I think what made me feel better was the fact that he simply validated my feelings and did not make me feel like I was crazy.  I calmed down right away after that.  He also asked me to take another hcg test just for my own sanity so I did and we got great numbers so I feel more relieved now.  

Best wishes and I'm sending you lots and lots of doubling energy!!!!!!!!!

Auggie


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## Guest

Hi Auggie,
I'm so glad your feeling better about things! I'm feeling pretty good about things myself. What have your hcg #'s been? I'm sure they vary from one person to another. I'm still using the rest of my test's, just for the fun of watching the line get darker each day! 
Have a great day!
*****************lots of baby dust to all*******************


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## Guest

Gwendolyn,
Just one more day! How do you feel? I cant wait for you to get a bfp! It will happen, its just a matter of time & hopefuly its now! 
Im going in for my 2nd hcg blood draw this am. I hope all is going well!

~MeShel


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## alex28

Good luck for tomorrow Gwen

I am still waiting for my surge so prob will be having IUI either Fri am or pm.  Hope not Sat as going away for the weekend!!
Good luck to everyone else.


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## jojo29

Hello,
Well lots has been going on whilst I have been away from FF, congrats to all you with BFPs.  I FINALLY have my smear results back and all is clear so I am starting the iui process this month.  I will begin predicting LH at the weekend and will probably not have insem until Thu/Fri next week as that's about day 12/13.
Good luck Gwendolyn hope it's a +ve  and everyone else who's on 2ww.  Hope it's my turn this month.
jojox


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## Guest

Hello all,
I went in this am for my 2nd hcg blood test. The numbers more than doubled...( first was 61 @ 13dpo & todays is 181 @ 15 dpo. Feb. 28th I have my first ultrasound.........so Scarry! 
Im wishing the rest of you BFP'S! It's your turn, & I look forward to watching this board for more good luck!
Auggie, Im not feeling sick yet, my only symptoms are sleepyness, & now my chest is a tiny bit soar. How's it going for you?

MeShel


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## Gwendolyn

Hi Everyone!
Thanks for all your "check-ins" and wishes.
I ended up getting my blood test on Wed. 9th...rather than waiting for the 10th....because I had a counselling session with the psychologist already booked (from awhile ago....I try to go at least once/month to keep my sanity!!)...and I asked if I could just get the blood test done while I was at the clinic.
Anyway, it was a BIG FAT NEGATIVE!

We are so very devastated....so very, very SAD.  I still haven't had my period....so my (and my DH's)  hopefulness was actually geared towards "THIS IS IT".  I feel like such a fool.  My sense of faith is wavering at best....and my hope is undefinable.
I left work immediately after teh nurse called me with the results and so I went to my DH's work to tell him personally.....of course, I had the same scenerio goping through my mind had it been a BFP!!! 

Needless to say, I have cried a lot today....and now I feel just so very numb- I can't cry anymore.  It kind of scares me.  Whatever is becoming of me??  My very supportive supervisor told me to take the rest of the week off.....I'll take the 10th and then reassess regarding the 11th.  I am not sure if being home makes me feel any better.  However, I work in the health profession....and my whole role is to give and give and give and GIVE to others who are unwell.....and I honestly, do not have much to offer right now.

As for next steps...I have an appointment on March 2nd with the specialist at the clinic to reassess next steps and give us a chance to ask "what happened? (or did not happen)".  The case manager nurse thinks the Dr will officially refer me to the IVF program (as this last cycle was just a fluke....the aim was IUI...and then I was "converted" due to too many follicles).  I have no idea what teh wait will be...the nurse mentioned May/June.  I just can't stomach this all very well now.  My DH is very frustrated too....there were so many "meant to be's" this time around....we feel so confused....so broken-hearted....so many unanswered prayers, I guess.  I worry my worst fear is becoming more and more a possibility....will we never conceive?  I mean, I feel as if we have had to make so many compromises already (case in point- donor sperm!!!)....and yet the suffering just continues!  It's like I am a race horse and all I want to do is try to get past the bloody gate!!!

Anyway....34th birthday in a week and a bit.  I had hoped to have much more to celebrate.
I am so sorry to just mention my own woes.......can't see beyond the black cloud, I guess.  Know that I treasure all of your shared stories and I hope to follow-up in a more diligent way in the near future.  For now, I am heading to bed with wishes of positive news for all of my FF here.
Take care, Gwendolyn


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## Ruth

So sorry to hear your news  

Ruth


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## jojo29

Hi Gwendolyn,

I do understand how you are feeling.  We are in exactly the same position as you , we have 5 failed DIUI attempts behind us, the last one being November 04.  There are times when I think 'what if it never happens' and 'why' etc etc but then I look at the success stories on this website and they give us hope - it can and it does work, we just need to be patient.  There are ladies who have tried for years and years and and eventually they get there.  These things just take time, we have to be patient and wait for our turn. I don't mean to sound patronizing but couples who try naturally can take a year or more and in our situation we have less chance so it only makes sense that we have to try that little bit harder. I don't know how long you have been ttc but for me it is just over a year so not long compared to many on FF.
I wish you lots of strength and positiveness to look onwards and upwards to attempt no 6.
We have decided to give it a few more goes with IUI as the stats show that up to 7/8 attempts the chances still increase but after that they tend to dip.
take care
Jojox


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## Chimp

Hello Gwendolyn

I am so very sorry it hasn't worked for you this time but as Jojo said it WILL happen. To try and help you feel so not alone on this very trying journey, I'll tell you my story. We've been TTC for over 3 years. My DH has extremely low counts and ICSI was our way forward. Unfortunately after 2 ICSI negative cycles and 2 ICSI abandoned cycles, we decided to go down the IUI route. We've had 3 cycles now and all have been negative. Each time you think you'll be able to handle the disappointment a little better, but, of course, you don't. I got my negative yesterday after an ICSI cycle had to be converted to IUI due to lack of follies. It is so very heartbreaking and it would be easier to just walk away from it all and surrender BUT we are strong, and I mean everyone dealing with infertility. It may not feel like that at the moment but allow yourself some time and you'll rebuild your strength and belief that it will work. I will stop rambling now and just say I truly wish you happiness and hope you'll experience motherhood very soon - we all so deserve to.

Lots of cyberhugs
Bumbles


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## natalie34

Hi Gwendolyn,

We have chatted on the donor thread. Just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear your news.

I am thinking of you.   

Nat x x x


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## BunBun

Gwendolyn & Dh so sorry to hear your news. 
I will be thinking of you & sending you all my best wishes for the future.


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## Auggie

Oh Gwen, I was heartbroken to hear your news! I know exactly what you feel like having been there so many times before but I am here to say keep the faith hon, it WILL happen- it is really a matter of time and I do believe luck with the timing.  Please keep the hope alive.  I'm sending you tons of hugs and warm wishes to both you and your DH.  

Love Auggie


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## Auggie

Alex, just wanted to send you best wishes for Friday!

JoJo- Best wishes for next week!

MeShel- great news!  My symptoms come and go and it is really terrifying as I've been feeling like they are getting less and less intense as time goes on so I'm cautiously optimistic at the moment.  Best wishes to you!

Auggie


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## alex28

Gwen - firstly i am so sorry! Like other says "your time will come"

Thanks for the good wishes Auggie. IUI tomorrow pm


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## BunBun

All the best for tomorrow Alex28. I've got a scan tomorrow & hopefuly I'll have a decission on what's going on - hopefully it won't be cancelled.


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## alex28

Thanks Mate and I really hope your scan goes well. xx


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## Guest

Gwen,
Please try to keep your chin up. I know it's really hard to do. Your success is just around the corner. Keep the faith.

MeShel


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## Auggie

Hi Alex- how did your IUI go?  Best wishes for a BFP!!

BunBun- how did your scan go?

MeShel - how are you doing?

Best wishes ladies!
Auggie


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## alex28

Thanks for asking Auggie it went fine, although i had a bit of bleeding when i went for a wee later that night.  None in my pants but only after weeing (TMI!!!).  Anyway she did tell me that may happen as this time i felt a little twinge when she put it in as she said she had to go around the corner!

IUI was done Fri at 3pm along, at the same time as Sims, Lily (i think) and a few others are due to test on the 25th.  Not sure when to test though the fri or sat??

Feeling positive though as have been charting my BBT, mucus etc on www.fertilityfriend.com and they calculated that i did ovulate sometime on the friday so fingers this time.  We are giving outselves 6 goes b4 we decide whether to go for IVF, so 3 down hopefully none to go!!

Little question for everyone else, as on clomid have had bad cramps etc from day 10 onwards which i thought was the follies growing, however i still have really bad cramping and what feels like ov pains now and im on day 20.  anyone else had this??  Its a little worrying as dont want to go the doc for her to put me on some tablets which i really dont want to be taking at the mo.


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## Jayne

Hi all 

I'm going to lock this thread now as it's moved on from the original topic and is duplicating the discussions under the donor board. Please feel free to come and join us over on the Anyone Else Using Donor Sperm? thread. Have added a link below 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php/topic,21806.60.html

Jayne x


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