# Desperate Advice needed PLEASE



## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

I am running out of time and need to make a decision by the end of the week  

Long story short. I had a 4th Failed IVF last April and I got a phone call from the clinic this morning saying I have one frozen embryo a Blastocyst and I need to use it within the next two months or it will be discarded ( I flew to Dubai for my last IVF and it is a law out there there they can NOT freeze embryos for too long)     

My question to you ladies is it worth me to spend lots on flights and hotels for that one frozen embryo? I am so exhausted and I do not fancy a 5th Fresh IVF but maybe is this the one??   Or am i kidding myself? all that way for just the ONE that might not even thaw??  

I do not want to look back in life thinking "what if i flew abroad and that could have been my baby" i am so so scared I will waste my time. If there were more embryos i would think it is well worth the trip. All that way for one? I need to know what I Should do?

Anyone had just one frozen embryo? and it thawed? and now have a baby?

Please please ladies i need someone to give me some honest advice. Thank you


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Rania


Its s tough one!  Personally i think if you can try and treat it like a bit of a holiday and maybe stay out there for a week, then regardless the amount you paid wouldn't feel wasted.  Your always have the emotional side of things if it doesnt work out but i think this is avoidable.  


Is the embryo through a pgd cycle? (looked at your signature)


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Oh Rania, you sound utterly exhausted.  I am so sorry that you are feeling like this and for being up against the clock to make a decision.

I have just one frozen embie and I was asking the same question, it seems as though the odds are so massively stacked against it working when two couldn't.  It seems as though many women have had success with one when they didn't with two.  It's like anything I guess, luck of the draw.  I got myself tangled up in the same but it's just one and such a slim chance of even thawing worries but there is always that little bit of hope there that makes the decision not to try very difficult indeed.

It's the what ifs that I know will get out of control for me.  If you can afford another flight then I would say do it, if you are thinking what if now then it could come to be a huge regret if you don't.  However, money is a colossal issue and I can imagine that flights to Dubai are a huge consideration.  It's a very difficult choice.  

I know that I am in nowhere near as difficult position as you and I have only had one failed cycle, so I really cannot imagine how drained you must be feeling.  You just sound utterly exhausted and that is the most horrible state to have to make this decision.

My heart says that I would do it, there is obviously a chance that it may or may not work but at least you won't have the regret and what ifs if it doesn't xxx


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## evan80 (Nov 30, 2013)

Rania personally i think you have more to lose by not going rather than if you go. You don't want to spend the years to come wondering whether that embryo could have been the one. Like you I have to travel for ivf. I am having treatment in the uk but don't live in the uk so i know how exhausting it can be to spend all that money on flights and accommodation when you could partly fund an ivf cycle with that money. I have five frozen blasts and I intend to go for each and everyone of those embryos because you never know what will work. Whatever decision you make you have to make sure that you don't have any regrets in future. Best of luck xxx


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## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

all babies come from just one embryo. 

there will always be questions like 'will it defrost', but in the end, one baby = one embryo. I think you have to try, because the alternative would be spending your life wondering.   good luck.


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## Maria00 (May 16, 2013)

Rania, I would do it coz I would hope this embryo is the one.  Best of luck!


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you ladies for your helpful replies.

Coweyes yes it is the PGD cycle. What has shocked me so much was seeing the international number ring and them telling me have a frozen embryo? as from what i remember on day 6 they said their was a slow blastocyst and not sure if it was any good for freezing? (well obviously they still went ahead and froze it) it was a bittersweet phone call. All the emotions and  heartache all came flooding back.

The problem now is getting time off work as I am a teacher I can not just go so easily   and my husband has such a demanding job and to sort everything out in the next few weeks. I was told to come in on my next cycle, it is a 8hr flight it is just not as easy at they make out!  

I have been googling all afternoon about thawing and when i think so much about it in honestly I cant see it happening   My worse case scenerio is the morning of the transfer being told it did not survive   (when it comes to bad luck I am always at top, everything that can go wrong just does for me!) My husband is just as scared as me and told me if i think it is worth it lets bite the bullet and go! and if he knows it is not we will just carry on "living" as we have in the last 10 months.. I called my first IVF doctor and told her the dilemma i am in< she told me it is like a 20% chance of it working. Ended the conversation "you never know just try it" I so wished it was a 5hr drive the fact that it is so far and tickets alone we are looking over £1200 and hotels are all over £130 a night not to mention then wanting to "prepare" my body for the transfer costing a lot. I am thinking ALL of this for a embryo that we just found out we had as they mentioned "not looking good and slow" that was back in April. I was so heartbroken I never called back to see what happened and did not even think they would have frozen the "weak slow embryo' I wish there was a crystal ball! and i would go in a heartbeat  

My brain has fizzled it has sucked the life out of me. 

I need to have a proper chat with the other half when he gets in and see what he says. He is a walking zombie. It has destroyed us both as people. I truly know it only takes the one?

I will ask them maybe keep till summer holidays? but she was saying two months max  

I wish i did not even get this call now


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## evan80 (Nov 30, 2013)

Rania i know how difficult it is but sometimes everything happens for a reason. Have a talk with dh and discuss your options. I doubt whether you can continue living the same way you have been living for the past 10 months because for the past ten months you had no idea about this embryo but now that you know it's just going to be different. When we were considering ivf treatment abroad we had two choices - either to go to the uk or to leuven in belgium. We did not just look at the cost of ivf or success rate but we also took into consideration flights and accommodation and it's a good thing we did because we got five frozen blasts out of our fresh cycle. So if you consider having another ivf abroad go somewhere which is closer and which is more affordable.

I know it's very hard but at least try to liaise with the clinic to extend the freezing time until it's convenient for you. They at least owe you this much considering that the did not tell you about the embryo until now.


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Def def give it a go.  A healthy embryo from a pgd cycle is even harder to come by.  I had one embryo transferred from a pgd cycle and now had a 10 month old daughter.  Its daunting but your work it all out, know its all a bit personal but can you explain it to your head?  Its extreme circumstances, eg use it or loose it.


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## mierran (Apr 24, 2009)

Misty b had 1 embryo from a pgd fet. It  thawed ok and she is now nearly 20w pregnant. 

I assume your embryo was frozen via vitrification? If so survival ratew usually 80-90%. Fet success rate varies hugely clinic to clinic but are likely to be 20-50% if transfer occurs.

do you both have to go? I am considering doing my fet as a fly out one day, transfer , then fly back the next. It is greece so only 4 hours. I will probably go on my own, definitely on own if doing flying visit.

good luck deciding what to do, but I think you need some specific figures from clinic as to their survival rate and success rates for eset fet.


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## Summer13 (Mar 11, 2013)

Hi, Surely theres every reason to believe it could be worth it, even for your peace of mind, maybe? Will you always be wondering if you don't, it might just be the one. I cant really talk cuz ive been pondering using up my other frozen embryos, but mine are day three's, at least you have a blasto, this is good! x


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you so much for all your replies x  Mieraan your post brought a tear to my eye, that this "might" be the one for me wow she is very blessed to be a mom from that one frozen embryo x

After everything I am reading I think I need to go out there and see if this might be my turn to get a positive  

I have never done a frozen transfer? How does it work? Do i need to be on anything? do i need all those damning scans? injections? Honestly if it was a weekend in Dubai "in and out" last time I spent almost a month there and Dubai is extremely expensive (i regret it a lot).

I get very "needy" and "emotional" during treatment and the thought of doing a long haul alone and being alone so far from my husband i know i can not do (I am still suffering from bouts if depression and when i hit rock bottom my husband can bring me back from very dark places, so i would love him with me)

Now work I just started a new school and how on earth do i bring it up? "I want to travel for IVF" I am scared that it will not go down well? and management may think "oh she has just started and will leave soon if it works?' even though i have been there just a month i really love the place the children and staff. it saddens me to think I might throw it all away for "motherhood" that might not even work??  

Would you ladies be honest? or make up some lie? I hate being in such a mess  

I think my heart is definitely to go now, and as one of you mentioned it is a PGD Blastocyst so that is like the creme de la creme possible.. and maybe a frozen transfer is what i need??  

I need to get through to them and knows exactly what their protocol so I can start making plans.

You ladies have definitely soothed a confused heart and mind! thanks again


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## evan80 (Nov 30, 2013)

Rania I am glad that you seem to be making good progress in making a final decision.  As I said before I am in a similar situation since I also have to travel for IVF.

I don't agree with you going alone for treatment.  This is something that you as a couple are going through and you need your DH by your side.  Not to mention the fact that you are in a totally different country.  Just go there together and try to turn it as much as possible into a holiday.  An FET is way much easier than a fresh cycle so I'm sure you will have some time to relax and visit places.

As for your dilemma regarding your new job, there is only one person at work who knows about my situation and that's my boss.  The thing is that I am next in line in a managerial post and at the time when I was going to the UK for my cycle, my boss was about to go out on maternity leave.  So I had no choice but to tell my boss about it and I begged her to keep it between us which she did.  Dh and I had to spend two weeks in the UK and therefore I had to come up with an excuse as to why I was going abroad at the same time that my boss was out on maternity leave in view of the fact that all managerial duties were passed over to me when she was away.  Luckily my father lives in the UK and against my wishes (because I hate lying) I had to tell them that my father suffered an injury and had to undergo an operation and therefore I was required to travel to look after him.  Everyone believed that excuse.  If it's a new job they hardly know you so maybe you can tell them something along similar lines that you have a relative who works in Dubai and who needs help.  Sometimes being too honest with people you hardly know may work against you.  As something as personal as IVF I would be very careful with who to trust because it is a new thing for a lot of people and they can end up asking way too many insensitive questions and you could end up becoming the subject of the day.  Unfortunately the only people who can understand this journey are those who have been through it.

We just started the protocol for FET.  Since we have to travel we were unable to go for a natural cycle and was therefore placed on a medicated protocol.  I started DR injections on Day 21 of my cycle and am now awaiting AF.  Seven days after AF shows up I will have a blood test and scan to confirm DR.  Once DR is confirmed I will commence estrogen medication.  After 12 days from commencement of the estrogen medication I go for another scan and blood test to check the lining.  If everything goes well I start progesterone medication on Day 15 and transfer should happen between Day 17 and Day 21 depending on the stage at which the embryos were frozen.  In our case they are blasts so I believe that we will have ET closer to Day 21. 


I hope you manage to find a solution soon xxx


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Oh rania.  I do feel for you.  I think you have no choice- you have to go and you have to try.  You will always regret it otherwise. This is just too important to not give every little shot- ESP with a blasto as well

As the others say if you can even have a few days out of it then do it! Would Half term or Easter not be an option if getting out in term time is difficult!? 

I totally get where you are coming from re the job as I am also a teacher and having had time off for ivf/ miscarriages has been tricky. I decided to be totally upfront with the management which was fine at first but backfired when they decided I'd had enough time !  I ended up having to request leave from the governors and anything ivf related now is unpaid - just adds to cost but they see it as "my choice!" and constantly tell me it's a "grey area". So I'd be careful and probably make an excuse about why you need to go.  But you must go! This could be your future baby!

Good luck ! Xx


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## Summer13 (Mar 11, 2013)

Hey, just a thought but could you have your frozen embryo brought over to England? I don't know how this would work, but maybe it's possible? Frozen embryo transfers are so much easier. Would it be possible for a clinic over here to do your scans so that you only have to go over there for the transfer? x


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Hi Rania, 

I would echo what the other girls have said, you should go for it, I had 2 fresh embryos transferred and no success but a frozen blast and I'm pregnant. I did the natural FET and it was much easier. I would see about having it moved but I don't know about any risks involved. Most importantly, and I'm only just learning to do this, put yourself first. Never mind the job (I'm a teacher too) you must put what you want ahead of it. They'll get over it whatever you do and if you have to lie, lie! Xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Oh lord I am having such a bad day   I literally can not stop crying. The clinic called me again I missed the call as I was in class. While on my lunch i was whispering in the toilets about the % and what grade it was. I was informed it was a very good Blastocyst grade A but there is still a 5% chance of it not thawing. 95% seems very high but I thanked her for the call and told her I will confirm days and dates.

My heart feels so heavy. I want this so so badly. She said I have to be in Dubai on day 2 of my cycle be monitored and on suppressants and day 12 or 13 Transfer, That is like 15 days in Dubai  

I am so scared of it being a no. It was totally out of the blue being told i have a frozen embryo and I feel my life is about to be turned into a tunnel of stress confusion and panic attacks   I have not stopped messaging my husband all day driving him insane on what he thinks I should do? 

Regarding work i was going to be honest to management. As you mentioned Evon no one in that school is someone i can call a "friend" yet as i am so very new. I definitely do not want to be "staffroom gossip" and it is so damn personal I just don't feel they will understand   And if it was a "no" i will be known as the "poor teacher" that is trying to get pregnant   I was going to mention need to go Dubai Family issues. Than it is a place where it is always associated with holiday and sun and I am not too sure if that will go down well.

I am thinking of saying I need a small surgery to remove cysts on my ovaries, and they need to make small incisions and it will be too difficult to move around for a few weeks? Do you think that is a valid enough reason? The more I think about it I honestly do not want anyone to know my IVF struggle. I feel if i have been there for years it would have been easier. Not even a full month and here i am asking for time off   If i had known i would have used that Embryo before starting the new job. The clinic needs to understand that we do have a life and theres plans that we need to make NOT "Come in on day 2 of your next cycle"

I have been getting myself so worked up and upset today. My brain is frying. I have not even looked after myself! I have been drinking 4 cups of teas a day eating what i like! vitamins?? now what on earth are they! my cupboard is bursting at seams with every fertillity vitamin out there! but have i taken any no! why?! because i didnt have treatment coming up    now here i am swallowing as many as I can drinking water.. It has all taken me by surprise   

Evon your protocol looks mega long, she mentioned on the phone that mine would be medicated but all with in 12-15days. I hope it works out for you x. It is so stressful treatment in itself  than sorting out flights and accommodation adds so much pressure that we can do without  . Last time i left Dubai I was so upset and swore never to go back again. I just want to get my baby and go home  

Loiuse were you doing your treatment term time or during the holidays? it is so hard to plan a period in your holidays, but that was naughty of them to say that. I am willing to say to them as I am new to take unpaid leave. The school is literally a 5minute drive from my home and I just do not want to lose my job. I know deep down I am taking the p'iss and I am sure I will ruffle a lot of feathers. I have struggled for 6 Years clinic to clinic tests after tests. Maybe god said i have a surprise for you! i want this to work so so so badly. 

summer thanks you so much for your words and I did not ask them about sending it over to the uk? and also doing the scans here that will save me so much money. I need to call them again and ask about the logistics. I was whispering in the staff toilet paranoid someone will hear  

leftleg a huge congratulations x brings me so much happiness hearing the good news. What did you take to prepare your body? health wise compared to the past i am definitely not at my best   I was so obsessed  before each cycle and now I feel I will only have myself to blame. I just did not know this would have happened.

My mind is all over the place should I just wait for my next period and go? what should i say to management? and most importantly prepare myself for a broken heart as it takes me time to recover from that dreaded day  

I need to act quick as time is really ticking and how long should I ask off 3weeks? 2 weeks? I can not make exact plans till I know when my period comes and thats also not been playing good recently  

I am stressing so much and I know i should just "relax" and what will be will be.


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Oh Rania I feel so sorry for how you're feeling   it's such an overwhelming feeling and I know what it's like. I struggled with my first three cycles and carried on at work and kept it quiet; they all failed. I took time off the two times it worked. That might not be the reason as I also had treatment for immunes which I hadn't previously had but you asked what I did differently to prepare myself and that was it. I decided I was going to put ivf first and work second for the first time. I wouldn't get too hung up on it being the right time or being 'good' i.e eating/drinking the right things, just be open to it mentally and try and put everything else to one side. Work don't need to know every detail just that you're having an operation and you need recovery time. Once you make that decision, if you do, you'll feel a lot better xx


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## evan80 (Nov 30, 2013)

I am sorry you are going through this. I find it really unfair that you were only just informed now about the frozen embryos.  A month after we went up to uk for treatment we received a discharge letter from the clinic and all the details of our treatment including the number of frozen embryos we have were listed on this letter. I am surprised tgat your clinic did not provide you with something similar. Maybe you should try and ask the clinic whether you can postpone the treatment and ask them to keep your frozen embryo for a bit longer. After all there was a shortfall from their end and it is unfair that you have to suffer for this.

Indeed my protocol is very long which screwed up my timings because our plan was to go in feb but because the protocol is so long we will be going in march. As I said I have a managerial position and it's a bit of a problem when it comes to ivf because everything depends on when af shows up so i just can't plan. Would it be possible to have all scans and blood tests in your country and then just travel for the transfer because that is what we are doing? I am just going to fax them the results on the same day that i have the tests.

The positive thing is that you have a very good grade embryo and it's definitely worth a try.

Try to relax and see whether you can discuss any alternative arrangements with the clinic. Best of luck. xxxx


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Sorry you are struggling but work must really come second now.  Tell them you have "Gynae issues " and will be needing a small op - they don't need to know any more than that !  !

Good luck!!! X


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

The problem in your situation is that you haven't been diagnosed completely.  There is a male factor, but obviously there is something else since your embryos didn't implant. I don't remember if your embryos when last time in Dubai were genetically tested since that could give some answers as well. My fet preparation was 5 weeks- 3 weeks birth control and 2 weeks of prednisone,  clexane,  neupogen. However,  my dr had a different approach than most of others I have heard of.have you been yold what your medications would be? 
Dubai is expensive,  but try to see places outside of it. Also, pray salaat al istikhara for a few days and then decide. Do whatever makes you comfortable. 
Are you sure that they can store the embryos for a limited time? This is not a case in other ME countries. Do they require storage payment?


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Rania, you sound completely overwhelmed.  

I think that my DH would agree that I was very needy and emotional during our treatment, but then we're the ones having to make these colossal, life changing, financially crippling decisions.  It's no wonder that we need someone to help us make the decisions.

I've been a bit like that again trying to decide whether we start again this month.  Our environment really isn't right at the moment, money is a massive issue and I'll have to spend over a week living up in London without my DH.  It's nowhere on the ranking scale compared to your epic trip but I do understand a little about how hard a decision this is.

I've not told anyone at work about our IVF, they know that I had an early miscarriage but not any more than that.  All of my managers are men and I feel like I've shared enough gynae issues with them of late.  I'm sure that they would be brilliant but I think that I can make it work with leave and working remotely.  That's obviously going to be impossible for you to do, so I think that I would plump for telling them that you were having an operation, which is pretty much what you'll be having in a way so it's not a huge lie.  I'd check out whether your school has an IVF policy first, it might be that they are very supportive and you don't need to worry too much.

Take it easy, perhaps this is the last mountain that you have to climb and the reason it is such a huge push now is that the outcome is so bright.  I hope so xxx


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## LisaL29 (Apr 5, 2012)

Hey rhiana

I personally would make the best effort to go, I've seen first hand the miracles that have come from impossible situations.

Firstly myself this current PG I had 3 left of my Day 1 embryos froze from 2010.  1 didn't thaw and the other 2 that were transferred were 2 cells at transfer, I was hoping they'd be 4 cells especially after my previous transfer which was my first BFP were 5&7 cell on day 2, I certainly wudve been more positive after transfer.  I was a complete misery guts my 2ww, contemplated living life doing the "donts" in 2ww as I was certain they'd fail but I'm 37+ weeks today with that one day 2 2 cell that did take!  Like other posters have said 1 embie 1 baby

I went thru the emotions of infertility and treatment with my close work colleague, her husband had anti sperm anti bodies at a high % of 93%.  She had 4 failed icsi.  After her 4th when all money, hope and looking forward had gone (especially after requesting her notes which read 5% of conception with treatment & 0% naturally) just 4 mths after 4th failed they fell pregnant natural !  So believe me miracles do happen.

And I know about bad luck I always said if the same odds were stacked for me I'd win the lotto every Sat night!  

Try and turn it into a holiday like another poster said you sound (and I can imagine) like you need a deserved break anyhows.

Lisa


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## Summer13 (Mar 11, 2013)

o the hours i've spent sat on the loo at work trying to have conversations with the clinic without people hearing me!! It's very sad but the thought of it did just make me chuckle to myself!

How are you doing? Have you made any decisions? I was just thinking, I don't know if you can get away with this but the last time i had a transfer i decided i was going to take the two weeks off and rest so i told them i was having a small 'procedure' and it was gyneological (not sure that how you spell it!) I figured nobody would surely have the nerve to ask me any more about it, and they didn't xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

You ladies are truly the best x My husband keeps saying "go back on the site and see what they suggest as they have lived it and know a lot" the irony was fertility sites were banned in this house. He use to always get angry, as he said after i would log out i would be in a very sad place. Now he keeps asking what news do you have? 

Lisa wow a huge congratulations and from a 2 cell transfer that shows miracles does exist! that put a huge smile on my face and i was telling him if a 2 cell thawed and was a baby! a PGD Blastocyst has to have a chance! he broke a smile and said not too get too ahead of myself.

Ok ladies my period came this morning so this month is out. I am thinking start of March, My next cycle. I love love love my new job BUT i want to be a mom so so badly   EVERYONE on here has told me to go for it, and why not I worked damn hard for that embryo and paid so much money and it does not make sense to let them "discard it" I am trying to get them to agree to allow me to prepare from here  

This is my question i go in on day 2 they do all the blood tests and scans and than what? surly i will NOT be on Gonal F as we are not trying to grow eggs? I HONESTLY DO NOT KNOW what is expected of me from day 2-12   I have sent the clinic all the questions and hopefully they will explain the drill to me as i feel like a lost soul. I should be a pro by now but the world of frozen embryos is so so new.

hearing 95% chance of thawing surly i will be ok?! PLEASE LORD do not let me be in that 5%  

I need to tell management as soon as possible BUT what day do i give her? as i cant predict exactly when my period will be? and i do not want to miss a day off UNLESS i know i have started the treatment. As I am new i will mention i need an urgent surgery that can not wait till Easter and I am fine taking it "unpaid" hopefully that will be in my favour. I know deep down it is not right for me to take sick leave so so soon into a new post. I still have morals and a conscience and my husband is happy I say that also.

I hope she is ok with it also. I am hoping to fly out 2 days before transfer 2 days after I do NOT want to be there for more than  5 days. When I get back as i am working with small children there is alot of movement lifting them again I do not want to risk anything in that wait. I feel two weeks off will be what I need. I pray it is all worth it.

Regarding my diet food vitamins. I have been a health freak with all my cycles. Now i will live as normal. drink my tea when i feel like it, have a bag of crisp if i fancy it. I will just be normal. Women that are on drugs and abuse alchohol and morbidly obsese all seem to fall pregnant at the drop of a hat   My husband said see it as a IUI, but I know its already an embryo  

I have so much to sort out in the next few weeks xx i hope i will be a mom by the end of the year!! irony it will be almost a year since that failed one so MAYBE this is it   I cant believe how everything has just turned manic within a week. We were talking about wheteher we wanted a 5th fresh cycle? than a call to say we have one on ice?? oh gosh maybe my prayers are getting answered     

Need to dip into my ISA never like to touch it. This will leave a huge dent into our accounts. Money comes and go but not this chance!  

One more thing ladies what should I ask for? Intraplids? steriods? baby asprin? please any advice or any tips? I know it is a day off for them on Fridays so will be a long weekend for me waiting for their reply. If anyone can just give the most simple and likely protocol they will give me? and hoping this clinic here agrees. I did not even ask how much it will cost!   gosh hope it is not too much!

Thanking each and every one of you xx and hoping everything turns out well. I will tell my beloved unborn mummy and daddy had to make you far far away and go back and get you xx (it does chew at me why cant my life be simple have sex and pregnancy! the fact that i have to do all of this just shows how much i want this so so badly and i will be the best mom i can!)

Many people think "ohhh no kids they must have so much savings and living life to the full" we literally have used everything we have saved, 

i hope they prepare me properly and just make it work


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

I would start baby aspirin from now. It won't harm you. Steroids like prednidone dhould be advised by a dr. So ask them that immediately.  I stsrted them aroynd 2 weeks prior to my et. The dose was 10 mg a day. Also Rania, they have a contact with my dr. Why don't you ask them to take his opinion about your case? I don't think  there's something to lose.  I don't have experience with the intralipids. 
May God help you on this journey and fill your heart with joy.


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

Rania
I wouldn't take any meds without advice from a medically qualified doctor or nurse.
Not sure how much I have to add to your stressful situation, but have you considered asking your doctor to sign you off sick (stressed or having an op...)?
I don't know if your work will need the reason why, if you get on well with your GP they can be as vague as you like. I wouldn't tell work you are having a procedure done without the paperwork to back that up, because that could be grounds for dismissal.
Better to book a holiday from work, ask for unpaid leave to sort 'family emergency' (no need to tell them where) or get your doctor on your side!

I am currently pregnant with an embryo (blast) rated third from my one and only IVF cycle - yes it was pregnancy grade or they wouldn't have frozen it, and I think it's an AA or something equally good, but the 1st (fresh) I miscarried, the second didn't survive the thaw and I just received a bill to store the 4th for another year, which I paid instantly because I couldn't at this point decide what I will want to do with it in the future- pregnant or not.

So I agree, you shouldn't let them discard your embryo, but try and use it.

My strategy would be:
1) talk to Dubai clinic about transferring it here. Can they do this? 
2) talk to a clinic here about doing the transfer in the UK (if that is where you are based), what the procedure is and which couriers they recommend
3) make an appointment with your GP and tell them about your situation
4) arrange time off work, if and when you need it.

Oh, and breathe! Yes it's important to your DH too, but men can never fully understand this journey, so try and give him a bit of a break xxxx


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## LisaL29 (Apr 5, 2012)

The only thing I can add on what to take that I believed aided me was vitamin B6 and obviously B12 as too much B6 can disguise B12 deficiency and both are needed TTC.  I also ate Brazil nuts & drank pineapple juice, along with some other Vits, Zinc, Vit C, Fish Oil, and pregnacare conception.

Basically 1st frozen transfer I done nada nothing and my lining was 6 = BFN
2nd Frozen I drank pineapple juice & ate Brazils and lining was 8 = BFP but MMC
3rd (this one) drank pineapple ate Brazils and took B6 & B12 (I also took other Vits) and lining was 13!  So I think the vits done what ppl say they do for lining.

I cut out coffee & alcohol but continued with my Tea and always had 1.5-2.0l water.  I also prayed a little conception novena

How much of all this done the trick I don't know, but my 2 cell took and stuck and now today, (because I know how much I huffed and left deposit & DP frozen sperm at gun point literally!! in a private clinic because ""there was no way this 2 cell would take"") I laugh and call my bump little 2 cell now and again as I remember my 2ww behaviour!

I really hope & pray this is the one

Lisa x


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## mierran (Apr 24, 2009)

Hi,
the only reason the clinic want you there is it is easier for them. 
My clinic want a scan day 2 to check all ok . I then start prognova ( oestrogen ) and get another scan after 10 days on it. If all ok I add in progesterone after 12 days on oestrogen which I take for 5 days before transfer.
there is no way they will do a transfer after 12 days. They must have got confused and meant 12 days on oestrogen.  Otherwise you would only have 7 days on oestrogen which I have never heard of and is not going to be enough to thicken lining. Unless they are planning on using gonal f but even then you need more than a week.

Talk to your clinic and have a look at agate's section on immunes too. Drugs which are used empirically without test results include clexane 0.4ml once daily, prednisolone about 10-20mg a day, aspirin 75-100mg a day, and intralipids. Intralipids are just a soya based intravenous food which has been found to help. You need one dose 2 weeks before et, one at et and one after you get your bfp then one every 2-4 weeks. Most clinics say till 12 weeks tho others continue monthly till 32 weeks.
There is a slightly incresed risk of birth defects such as cleft palate with clexane and esp steroids. No problems have been asociated with the intralipids as far as I know unless you are allergic to soy
I was on aspirin 75mg and clexane for my successful cycle and will be again for my fet.

The other thing I would advise is get an endometrial scratch. It is done during the luteal phase so usually day 18-28 of the cycle before. It is supposed to help implantation.

Tell the clinic you can only come for a few days. It sounds like they are not used to dealing with couples from abroad if they expect you to be there from day 2. As I said et is likely to be day 19 of your cycle.

Good luck getting things sorted. 

X x


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

good luck with your decision. Surely you can be monitored over here for bloods and scans - I have done cycles in Spain and Greece and had thescans emailed over to them and bloods. 
I do think that you have to follow you heart and do what is best.

i had a friend who left her last frostie in the freezer for years and had fresh cycles in between she only went back for it when they wanted more annual storage fees and that was her daughter!
For your  employer you could say that you need to have a gynae procedure and recover (which you do for ET) and that as it is cycle dependent you aren't exactly sure when but it is likely to be xx, you could say that your GP will sign you off sick (depends if your sick policy allow you to travel or you have to declare it) but you could offer to take unpaid leave for the days.

Good luck xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Again thank you ALL from the depth of my heart for each and every reply   I re-read what you ladies advise out loud a few times over. Maybe just maybe MY miracle is a month away  

I am in a little rush, but I got the international e-mail and I thought I will quickly type it on here and I will reply a full one later.

Thank goodness I CAN start of here and fly over for the transfer (that will save us a tremendous amount) and i got given the all clear as long as I follow the below instructions:

Ok CD 2- Ultrasound to check lining. A Blood test- Estradiol.  And an Injection of  GONAEPTYL 0.1 mg (fax ASAP)

    CD 3/ CD4 - NOTHING

      CD 5- Start using progyluton tab 2mg estrogen (3 times daily for one week)

    CD 12- Ultrasound to check edomentrium thickness. Blood test E2 + LH. If all is normal start cyclogest suppositories 400MG Three times daily in addition to the progyluton. 

    CD 17 Frozen Embryo Transfer!!  

Than at the bottom of the e-mail  she stated that "Intraplid will be either given on the day of transfer or the day before. Aspirine and Clexane will be given post frozen transfer.

Does the above protocol sound about right?

Gosh I feel a flutter in my heart. I so hope that this random phone call last week holds the magic i have been wishing and praying for              I am feeling rather overwhelmed I want this so so badly ladies


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

I really hope it all works out for you too!
My protocol was a bit different as it was drug-free (apart from the Ovitrelle trigger shot 36hrs before transfer), owing to severe OHSS first time around.
I went in early in my cycle for a scan and again on day 12 or something like that, I don't think I had bloods taken.
Best of luck xxx


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## fififi (Mar 16, 2011)

Rania - new to this thread but as fellow teacher wanted to help you out by saying how I got round work issue as I too had cycle pretty soon after starting new post. (Now PT hence reason for not being at school today!)
Glad you can organise for scan & bloods at UK clinic close to home so that should make first steps easier. Once you need to go out to Dubai you can legally sign yourself off sick for first week. Then, on return, get GP to issue you with sick note for 2 weeks citing "Gynaelogical Proceedure" as reason for absence.
I was able to speak with my GP once I got to that stage as my tx was in Uk but I'm sure if you went to speak with yours prior to flights he/she would agree to that ahead of time.
As far as speaking to my school about it I told them a month or so ahead that I had been advised by hospital that I needed a gynae proceedure but as it was dependent on my menstral cycle I wouldn't know what date it would take place until few days before. In my case I just apogised about fact that this had come up so soon after starting work for them. If you wanted to offer to take this as unpaid I'm sure that might help as a sweetner but hopefully they won't actually require you to do so.

Once back at work I then took things a bit easy for following few weeks (had BFP but sadly MC) and gave the excuse of the surgery as reason for not putting PE equipment out/moving tables, chairs etc. In my case I talked to my class (FS) about fact I'd had an operation so needed to be careful and the kids were really good at trying hard not to run into me etc or sit on my lap at story time etc. (not that they are supposed to sit on my lap but have quite lot of needy kids so I don't always follow that rule!)

Do hope you can channel your nervousness into excitement and have a really happy ending to this "saga"     

PS. Any chance the clinic can delay until nearer the Easter holidays so that your 2ww can co-incide with some of that at least?


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Great thatyou can get it done here- have you lined up a clinic to do your scans or bloods?  If you are in London there are plenty. Also getting your international prescription in the UK there are a few places where they accept international ones if you don't have a uk clinic willing to transcribe.

The IL, aspirin and clexane where the same when I had my Greek cycle. Ive never had a straight forward lining so my protocol wouldn't be the same but oestrogen to thicken the lining and cyclogest is standard.  

Fingerscrossed xx


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## mierran (Apr 24, 2009)

Hi,
glad you've got things sorted.
They are using the down regulator to thicken your lining for the first few days.

I know a lot of clinics like you to have another intralipids 2 weeks before et, one at et and one when you get your bfp then every 2-4 weeks till 12 weeks ( most clinics say every 4 weeks ) tho some continue monthly till 32 weeks.
good luck with treatment.
x x


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Hi Ladies   I got a phone call from the embryologist saying I need to come on my next cycle and April is no longer a option. As work was heavy on my mind and trying to see if I can wait till the Easter holidays? but definitely it is the next cycle.

It was very lovely that the doctor called me personally. I was asked to do an Intraplid or IVIG two weeks before I fly out for transfer? She said she will forward me the dosage what I should be on? Are they the same?   never heard about a IVIG before?? Also she asked me have I done the TH1 and TH2 blood tests? (nothing to do with thyroid TSH?) I can not think for the life of me if I have done that test?

Now i can start from here, the good thing is that I will know exactly when i will fly out. Hopefully i will take the few days off after the transfer also. Like you Fifi theres a lot of action in my class and a lot of bending and lifting equipment and running at P.E, I know it will be too demanding on my body.

I am so anxious but also excited. I so want this to be ok   Doctor told me post transfer will be on asprin steriods and clexane injections Cyclogest.

Will keep you all updated it is all happening so fast. We are hoping to book a ticket and hotel last minute as they usually drop it a day or two before booking   

I need to ask around for Intraplids as my old clinic does not do it? I was told to go to any hospital a&e will either have intraplid or IVIG or a Maternity ward??

Seriously what do i say? and will they even allow me?   they will fax me the prescription. This is my next hurdle.

Definitely update you amazingly helpful ladies xx


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Th1 and 2 are cytokines responsible for some immune responses in the body that can reject the embryo from the beginning (if they are already elevated) or cause a chemical pregnancy.  Ivig should supress them and steroids as well. Do thise tests asap because if they turn to be ekevated, your dr might suggest the steroids earlier.


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Hello Ladies,

A quick update on what happened, 2 days before I was suppose to fly out  to Dubai for the transfer, they found a 1cm POLYP in the exact place that the embryo should be placed.   I broke down and cried while the wand was still in me.. We have booked the flight and hotels and now being told it has to be removed!?

Long story short the clinic in Dubai will save it for one more month. I had a Hysterscopy and D+C this morning feeling blah waiting for the next period and hopefully it will fall in my easter holidays.

Seriously when will this every end? my hormones were looking great, my lining was above 10 tripple line everything was text book than this huge white blob on the screen  

I pray April will be smoother. Will keep you all updated xx


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## fififi (Mar 16, 2011)

Sorry to hear about polyp - hopefully that delay will actually be for the best and enable you to time tx with the holidays meaning less stress


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## Guest (Mar 19, 2014)

Hi Rania,
Just read your heart wrenching story and didn't want to read and run.

So sorry to hear about your delay and recent op but you will be in a much better position to receive your precious embie. I would have made the same decision and echo what a lot of the other ladies have said - it only takes one! You may have lived life always thinking 'what-if?' 

I really do wish you a speedy recovery and all the best with your transfer, will keep an eye out for updates,
Take care, Tish x


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Thank God it was discovered before you flew to Dubai or imagine if they hadn't discovered it and it was there?! That would be a waste of embryo and everything else. Now you will go healthy.  God's timing is the best timing and God willing,  yours is coming.


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

Best of luck, Rania, hope you recover soon xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you ladies.

Can not believe my luck   not long after the Hysterscopy and D+C I started having a fever and was not doing too good was rushed to A+E. They did a blood test and said i have  Urine infection likely from the procedure I had 9 days ago    I am on antibiotics praying to god it clears before my frozen transfer. First a Polyp and now this? Literally waiting for my period to start and back on the protocol again. I just want it over with be it a yes or no... I feel it is dragging out


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

thinking of you xx


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Oh Rania, the constant obstacles must be unbearable.  I can understand that the waiting and uncertainty must be almost unbearable.

I wish that there was something that I could say, but words will never be enough.  You are in my thoughts though xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

I give up. I honestly cant keep doing this to myself  

CD2 my Estrogen is 980 should be under 50 and there it was on the screen a HUGE 6cm Cyst!? Where on earth did that come from?! I called Dubai having a full blown panic attack she said "next few days aspirate it" I called my uk doctor and she said it is done under full sedation as a fine needle will go in and "pop" it. My husband is like "screw a baby or not!! you have just been under not long ago for that Polyp and NO WAY you are going under in the next few days! if this damn baby wants to come to us it will!! and we will not kill you in the process!! " he was so so angry/upset

My doctor here said birth control pill next 21 days has a 50/50 chance of removing it?? and will go itself? What should I say to them in Dubai? 'my husband isnt open to the idea the next 2 days to aspirate it? and is the pill ok?' my doctors words was they sound very aggressive in their approach and try the pill first if it does not remove it I will remove it for you day 2?

I dont want to "**** off" the doctors in dubai they sending me one thing and im doing something else?? 

I was so excited as it was timed beautifully in the Easter holidays   than i get back after the holidays and mention "oh i need some time off  " so fed up with it all. Today i have been taken to a dark place   Polyp.. Urine infection.. now a Cyst??! (this is someone who has always had a text book uterus! only in this mess due to my husbands depressing sperm count...) This isnt fair... hotels and flights again getting messed around  

Maybe this trip was just not meant to be  

Sorry for the rant my husband is angry and saying he will not let anyone put me under and prod me! im like the quicker they do it 100% its gone! he wants me to take the pill>> he said try the pill for 21 days and if doesn't work than maybe this aspiration.

Just going to sleep now just need "escapism"


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## Wookster (Jan 17, 2013)

Rania, I had to have troublesome cysts removed by aspiration, it really is a simple day procedure. I went in early in the morning, had sedation, and in theatre they drained the fluid away - took 20 - 30mins so quick. was home by lunchtime. 
I have to say I as an aside i know how you feel, as i had one thing after another getting i the way of my treatments, I just brushed myself down picked myself and got through it as best I could, come on  you can do it be strong x


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Bless your husband when he is so concerned about you. I'm sorry you are going through this!
As for the aspiration, I don't think it's anything more than egg collection.  Shouldn't be complicated. I went for the egg collection  any times and never had a problem. Rania,  there must be a light at the end of the tunnel. Just be patient for a bit longer!.


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Hi Rania, 

Sorry for all yours troubles. I had the cyst aspiration and it was very quick and painless. Hope that's a comfort for you xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

thank you ladies for your kind words. It is like we have done 4 full IVFS and it has been much smoother than this frozen transfer?? never a hiccup always straight forward. I guess as it is done international it is ever so frustrating the timing and our lives getting all thrown out of whack..

I think it is going "under" that upsets my husband the most and he is hoping the pill will fix it. I am very small naturally  (7st .5) and he feels it is not doing me any good.

I will see the doctor in two weeks and if it is still there and not shrunk i will have no choice to have it aspirated.

It is exhausting it really has to end. I just want it in me a BFN OR A BFP so i can move forward. I pray all this is well worth it


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## Nutpot (Feb 6, 2010)

Rania, I would like to try to put your husbands mind at rest. I work in operating theatres and my job is assisting anaesthetists with anaesthetics/sedation. 
Although I have not had a cyst aspirated myself, I have seen it done many times and you don't go fully 'under', it is not a full anaesthetic.
Normally they would give you very light sedation which will make you drowsy and unable to remember what has happened, but not actually put you to sleep. It is a very safe and quick procedure.
I hope that makes the decision a bit easier for you    


Lots of luck xxxxx


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## Peppermint76 (Sep 20, 2012)

Rania I'm sorry to hear about all the trouble you are having  
I read through but could see what your clinic said about transferring your blast to England (sorry if I missed it) it would at least take the pressure off you to be able to feel 100% ready     I will be hoping and praying you get a BFP as the outcome of you FET. Good luck Hun xx


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

Hi Rania, I had two ovarian cysts aspirated/drained after I developed ovarian torsion following OHSS and they did it without any sedation whatsoever.
I basically watched on the ultrasound as the needle went into my tummy and pulled all the liquid out into a jug.
No it wasn't pretty or much fun, but it was quite interesting and such a relief! My ovary went back to normal straight after. I think they may have injected some local aneasthetic into my stomach skin where the needle went in, but it was totally bearable.
I guess it depends how deep your cyst is (mine were just below the tummy wall and could be felt from the outside) and what other options you may have xx


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## Bethlehem (Dec 2, 2013)

I just wanted to come on and wish you the very best of luck. I have been following this thread and its really incredible. Best wishes and I hope everything turns out well for you x


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## Teeinparis (Sep 15, 2013)

I was just browsing and thought I would suggest what a clinic in OZ said I could do (am located in France but am from Oz).  Just fly the frozen embryo to you.  It is cheaper than two flights and the UK lab will keep it longer etc.  Then you have no time pressures.  You do the FET when you are ready to.  Just another option.  

Best wishes


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## Liese (Aug 22, 2011)

Hi Rania, 
Jus reading through your story. Can't add much to help with the medical side of it, but from the POV of a fellow teacher. Our job becomes our lives too often so don't worry about asking for time off when you need it. That's taken me a long time to get my head round but I have at last! Massive good luck to you xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Hello Ladies xx Firstly I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all your support and encouraging words xx  

Every time I want to update something else comes up.

I will try and make it quick finally after 3 months of one shock after another be it a Polyp Cyst etc etc Transfer is taking place this Tuesday 13th  

Regarding that Jumbo Cyst my husband was so against them doing anything to me and said 'it will go naturally and take the pill as they said 50/50 chance" Thanking god with every ince of my body last weeks scan was a nice and clean uterus!   no Polyps no ugly blobs just a nice 10mm triple line   as the doctor did the scan I did not even look at the screen as i can feel myself getting emotional, and I know everything that appears on that screen, i know what is normal and what isnt   She was clicking the screen zooming in than the words "this month looks like the month transfer will take place" nice and clean Uterus   (Finally some good news! i always seems to walk to my car crying when i leave this clinic!)

I am taking 6 Cyclogest a day! yes 6    not nice at all two in morning two in the afternoon and two before bed.. the doctor told me one through the back passage and one vaginally (not nice at all!) I am also taking estrogen, Asprin, Steriods, had my first Intraplid last week also and I also think one on transfer day? (need to speak to the Dr in Dubai)

We are flying out on Monday morning to Dubai having Transfer on tuesday and back home Saturday I am sure 3-4 days lazing around will be fine before the flight back. 

As you all know it is a very long trip for one frozen embryo it has not even crossed my mind if it does not thaw   i was given 5% that it may NOT thaw and usually 95% of the time they do. I need to this for my sanity as i may never get this chance again.

I felt guilty asking for time off as we just had Easter. I was shocked my the response "get better and health comes first take the time you need to recover" ( i did not mention IVF just said a small women surgery that was urgent and i need some time to recover) Touch wood things seem to be sailing smoothly.... Just need to type up lesson plans for the supply teacher so I know i am covered in that department.

I know I am thinking ahead but when they put a 5 day blastocyst on Tuesday when is the BEST day to test?  i definitely do not want to do one too early, I just one to do one knowing that is the answer?? I was thinking Sunday 5 days after or is that too early? 

I want this so so badly I cant see myself doing a 6th IVF   So much money and time is invested in this cycle i please pray to the lord it is the one  

I will update to you amazing ladies what is happening xx thank you and god bless x


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Good news! God willing you will be posting only good ones from now.

You can test 7 days post transfer, but some embryos, esp frozen ones take a bit more time, so the best would be day 9.

Make sure your blood flow to uterus is good. My Dr prescribes clexane as well. This could be something to mention to your Dr as well. It can't harm you. Those blood thinners are not for women who have issues with the clotting ,but they improve the blood flow as well.

Good luck!


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## Liese (Aug 22, 2011)

Huge huge good luck for transfer Rania. 
Can I just ask have you had to provide any hosts letters to your head for your time off? I've had to and it's had to be kept on file which I didn't want. But I'm still determined to take off whatever I need. 

I'll say a little prayer for you on Tuesday xx


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## Liese (Aug 22, 2011)

*hospital letters


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## Guest (May 12, 2014)

Hi Rania and all other ladies,
Hope you are well?
Rania - wow, congratulations on getting this far, I'm sending the very best wishes for your transfer tomorrowx

Re: testing early, I would agree with Cosmopolitan at about 9 days for a frozen blast. Any earlier and you may get a negative which may be upsetting for you. I've just had a 5 day blast put back and tested at 12DP5DT and got a strong positive, so maybe at 9 or 10 days it would have been a faint positive.

Please do keep us posted huni, best of luck, take care
Tish x


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Wow congratulations tish a happy and healthy pregnancy god bless you xoxoxo 

Had my transfer yesterday and yes the one did thaw   I saw the beautiful embryo on the screen and it was surreal watching it get sucked into the tube and than placed back in me... The doctor showed me the white dot and said " this is your baby"   it was so emotional for me to see and a long time coming  

I type to you ladies sat on bed in my hotel room, taking it very slowly and I feel at peace.. I have something new this time round progesterone injections and oh boy they sting and give me such a numb bottom. Again hoping it is all worth it.. I was shocked 14 injections cost us just  under £500 did not see that coming at all. I will get upset if I start doing maths with all the money spent (again praying all will be worth it)

Here is what I am taking estrogen tablets x3 a day, steroids x2 a day, aspirin x1 a night, progesterone intramuscular injection once daily, crinone gel every night, and clexane injection every night.... Also I had intraplids done straight after the transfer...

Wow reading it like this I am on so much meds. I am so happy I flew out and gave this embryo a chance please please ladies keep me in your prayers   They said I can test Wednesday 8 days is far too early in my eyes. I will wait till Friday hopefully after 10 days with a blastocyst transfer something must show on the blood test...

I will keep you all updated I want this so so much now. Compared to the last 4 transfers I feel so so peaceful maybe because it was a frozen transfer? And not as stressful as the long winded full cycles. Sorry I babble a lot when I'm nervous.. Please please god let this be a yes and complete my life x


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## Guest (May 14, 2014)

Got everything crossed for you Rania, take care 
Tish x


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Thinking of you Rania, I sympathise with the progesterone injections! Keep calm if you can and do nice things for a while X


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## njr_26 (Aug 27, 2011)

Rania, progesterone injections hurt less if you have a warm shower first and warm up the vial for 5 mins in warm water. After injecting in the upper outer quadrant of your bum rub it vigorously to disperse the oil and it will be less bumpy. I used to get my DH to do these injections as he could see where he was going better.


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

With every passing hour my bottom is so sore just went to the toilet and I could not get up, I am limping so badly I can honestly break down and cry. I just called my husband saying I swear he hit a nerve! The clinic is not very close to the hotel and she said we can go daily for them to take it or if my husband is confident he can do it for me... I really don't know if I want him to give it me tomorrow   I physically do not know if I can take this intense pain daily for the next 10 days.

I told him to inject aspirated too see if there's blood than continue? He injects the full thing wipes my bottom and said there was a speck of blood.. I said to him there should be no blood! He said its a tiny tiny dot!? I just pray he's not done any damage to me....

I am a tiny built 7st.6 v v slim and I certainly do not have a big bottom maybe the 1.5 inch needle is too long for me?? I can take pain but wow both of my bum cheeks are dead and very very sore  

I was fine a few hours ago but as time had gone on my pain is getting a lot worse.

Is it because injections are more effective? I was more than happy with th cyclogest. I will have to monitor the pain. It took me a while to answer the door for room service I am limping at a very slow pace.

I will try heating it as you mentioned and not keep it in the fridge, the needle is a small prick but it's an hour or so later when the pain is something else..


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## Leah66 (Dec 14, 2011)

Raina, sorry I can't help, I didn't have those injections.

I just want to wish you luck, I know it's a tough long road but look how far you have come.
Stay strong, positive, rest as much as possible xXx


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

Oh Rania, sorry to hear you're in pain!
Lovely to know your little one is happily snuggled in, please send him or her loads of positive vibes and love.

I never heard of those injections, shame you can't just take the pessaries...xxx


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Good luck Rania. God willing,  Friday will be a glorious day. 

As for progesterone,  , I did it myself and rarely felt any discomfort.  Do it in the upper quadrant and then massage.the needle should be long and a bit thicker, but really not painful.  I would advise you to askfor cyclogest as well. I used 2ml of oil in injections plus once a day 100 pessaries.

why do you use clexane in the night? In my logic, it's better during the day when you're more active and blood flows more. What's your dose? Lay down on your left to make the flow to the uterus better.

Don't forget before maghrib supplications! 
Wish you a success this time!


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Hi, as Cosmo said,  I also did those injections myself and didn't have the pain you describe. It was more the sight of the big needle I didn't like! I found it much better to do them myself as I could decide exactly where I wanted to inject and at what pace. They say to do it 'like a dart' but I did it nice and slowly and honestly didn't feel it, this also helped lessen the pain afterwards. You shouldn't actually feel pain as such after but I sometimes felt uncomfortable when I sat down. My doctor told me to inject higher up and then I only felt it when walking but that was after having done them for weeks. Are you using Emla cream to numb the area first and warming up the phials?


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

Oh and I often had a bit of blood leak out afterwards and sometimes some oil. Hope it gets better for you!


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## Happybabycoming (Apr 25, 2014)

Dear Rania,

First of all I think you should have a chat with the embryologist at the clinic. Most do not freeze an embryo if they don't think it will have much chance of working. Sometimes they are slow at first and speed up later. I have read lots of success stories with embryos that were deemed very bad quality, as well as lots of non-success from the best quality ones. Ultimately you will never know. 
I see time is on your side so it is also a question of whether you want to do another fresh cycle at some point. If so, you are likely to get more. 
Finally, do you know about Pegasus Airlines? I flew to Dubai with them via Istanbul last year and the return flight cost me 130GBP, yes 130!!

I wish you the wisdom to make the decision that is best for you.


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## Moonface kitty (Aug 6, 2013)

Hi Rania, ( you have my sister in law name) just wanted to day a massive congrats on getting so far, I know it not been an easy decision.  have been your secret stalker for ages but was never in a position to advise. As you can see from my signature am a bit of a risk taker like you so hope this pays out.. Will keep you and your baby bean (positive thinking) in my prayers, wishing  you best of luck


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## Happybabycoming (Apr 25, 2014)

Hi Rania,

I jut want to appologise for my well-meaning message last night. Somehow, I didn't see any of your recent posts and thought you were still thinking about coming to the UK to do your FET! So you are here and that is great news! Rooting for you!


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## Happybabycoming (Apr 25, 2014)

Hi Rania,

I jut want to appologise for my well-meaning message last night. Somehow, I didn't see any of your recent posts and thought you were still thinking about coming to the UK to do your FET! So you are here and that is great news! Rooting for you!


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you so much ladies for your success stories and well wishes it really means so much to me, and gives me so much strength and happiness knowing it can and will happen one day x  

Really looking forward to going home tomorrow. It is way too hot to do anything here and I am getting very "itchy" to get back to "reality" and my home.

Regarding the injection thank goodness the limping has stopped. It is still very sore and painful in that area and when i sit for too long it hurts standing up. I put the little bottle in my bra for 10 minutes and was lovely and warm by the time my husband starting making the injection for me. I found a very cold can of coke in the mini bar and just numbed my bottom with it for a few minutes ( of course on top of a small napkin, didnt want a frost bite on my bum  )

I am 3 days past a Blastocyst, thank goodness i am still feeling calm. I am not googling symptoms as I have done in the past like a crazy possessed women   I am going with flow and hopefully praying after all these years and pain and heartache this will be my turn to "feel" a positive  

My tummy isnt being nice, cramps, diorehea bloated, after breakfast this morning had a instant reaction. not too sure if its the nerves? or just a different country and food? my bowles have been all over the place. I just feel like theres a firework display going off in me.. really unsettled tummy. (again hoping that will not cause too much havoc to implantation)

Tomorrow morning I need to go to the clinic and do a Estrogen and Progesterone blood test that will be 4 days past transfer too see what my hormone levels are? than back home x

Please please ladies keep me in your prayers this is my 5th transfer and I am so exhausted and really want it done with now,, I am so ready to be a mom and hopefully welcome a new year   baby 

Ladies I should be a pro by now as I have been here 5 times now, but I seem to be so sleepy? maybe all the drugs i am on? the 38 degree hot weather? its like the minute i close my eyes i actually fall asleep for a hour or so? Maybe when i am back home its work home go go go and now i have nothing to do but read and relax? I have noticed that I am very sleepy. Also when my husband gave me my  Claxene injection this morning i got very dizzy and had to sit down?

Gosh i said i would not symptom spot but these two things happened...

Thanks again ladies and will update you xxxxxxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Finally home best feeling ever..

My progesterone level is almost 200 I thought it was high but they said its great and my estrogen is around 500 again a good high.

They want m to test Wednesday 8 days past transfer, I think it is far too early. I have been here too many times when I test it's a negative and they send me back after a few days, I honestly do not want  that. Do you ladies think 10 days past a 5 day transfer will be a confirmed answers.? Or should I wait 11 or 12 days? Just don't want the uncertainty or a v v weak answer..

Today's I'm 5 days past a blastocyst transfer, zero symptoms


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## Leah66 (Dec 14, 2011)

Lovely that you are home, I didn't have a frozen transfer but I got a BFN 3 days before my BFP.. I would say wait until your ready because I was distraught when I saw the BFN, obviously I was delighted when I tested positive but I went through hell when I could of just waited a little longer!

Also I didn't get any symptoms right through my pregnancy, even my bump didn't appear until 5 months!

Wishing you all the luck in the world. Xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

God bless you Leah xx for the clinic they just want a statistic for there log book, for me it's so much emotions involved, once my hcg was 4.5 and said try again in 2 days, longest and depressing 2 days in my life, second hcg -1.57. Sometimes doctors do not understand the emotion that we go through. I said to her on the phone I will wait 10 or 11 days, I can't afford my weak heart to be messed around and have a hcg off 5 or 7. I need it to be a solid yes or no..

Usually by now I'm a crying wreck, I am so cool and honestly couldn't cry if I wanted to. I pray this is a good sign  

What I have noticed a lot of watery discharge, literally like Im peeing my pants very very clear and water like? Anyone had this? Usually before my period it is thick white discharge? This is definitely something different? Anyway not going to symptom spot and going to meet a friend now for a nandos lunch xx

Ladies I want this so so badly I pray this is my big break, never had a BFP ever in my life, just want to feel that crazy happiness


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

Blood test would show even on day 7, but my Dr tested me on day 10.


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## mamochka (May 23, 2013)

Rania,

All pregnancies are so different - on one I had a positive on digital from day6 post 6dt (sensitivity in urine 25) and the other pregnancy I had hcg 11 on day9 post 5dt. As they say implantation takes place between day 7 to 12 past ovulation  and first hcg is then excreted into blood (into urine 1-2 days later). Good luck this time, really routing for you!  Mxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Aww thank you ladies my heart is set on Friday to test.

I am in a situation, I told the school that I am working In for 6 days off and I should return Wednesday, now that I am thinking about it I would rather take the rest off the week off which will be 9 days total.

I work with very small children 2-3 year olds, a lot of singing bending running, it is a full day off energy , and some huge random hugs during the day and a few heads have butted my belly in the past with the unexpected hugs! My husband said go in and do not do much.  Working with tiny children it is impossible to even sit down for a second, I feel with the hot weather and everything I have done to get here today I might as well take the remaining  3 days off and when I return I will no for sure what the score is.

Do you think I am getting lazy and petty? Or would you ladies do the same? Am i taking the biscuit? I love my job so much but I have been so relaxed past few days I know work will be loopy. I know by Wednesday I'm either pregnant or not but I still feel I might hinder my chances going in? I'm so confused.com right now


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

If you will feel more comfortable by staying at home, do so. I know you dont want to blame yourself in case you did some efforts and then the test showed-, God forbid.
You will have another blood test on Monday?


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

I think you're far from being lazy or petty, give it the best possible chance and stay at home x


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Rania, I've been watching your post and your huge highs and lows but I've not posted anything since the beginning.  I just wanted to say huge congratulations on getting to where you are now.  I am just so excited for you.  I really am keeping everything crossed that you get just the most wonderful news soon.

Because this has been such a colossal and fraught journey for you then I would say to stay at home if you can too.  For me, just that little extra time to take it easy and have no outside stress would be the right decision - and absolutely no temptation to do anything that you shouldn't!  It's amazing that you love your job, some women definitely find it better to go back and take their mind off it but it really does sound like you need that little bit extra pampering time to just look after you xxxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you all so much for your warmth and understanding xx means so much to me x

Today I'm 6dp a blastocyst transfer and I think the nerves have really kicked in. Last few days my feet have been so cold no matter what I do they just don't seem to want to be warm?? Of course clever me googles "cold feet in 2ww" and it's all linked with a cold uterus and cold feet? And implantation is hard with a cold uterus etc etc...

Really got myself upset reading all of this ( damn google!) have any women had cold feet in their 2 ww and got a positive? Gosh such a random question. But if there's a link to cold feet and implantation not looking good as my feet r like ice cubes!   Again this is new symptom I don't remember cold feet last time?

I think the paranoid stage of the 2 ww hs officially kicked in


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

I can't help regarding the cold feet. However, I will recommend to soak your feet in warm water, not hot. Then, wear nice fluffy socks and move more so that the blood circulation would be better. Also, I think clexane would be better during the day than during the evening.


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you Cosmo I do the clexane in the morning as 2 injections at night is too painful for me  

Today my panic attacks have started very very nervous and just want to live in the moment that I might be pregnant  

I should be a pro as this is my 5th 2ww, I honestly don't know what I am feeling? What's happening? Not really felt anything? Implantation? Nothing? As I am a very tiny built I thought I might have felt something? 

My throat has started to get sore I pray I'm not coming down with a cold?

I have decided to test on Friday 10days past a 5 day blast something will pop up on the blood tests if it was a positive?? Not going to pee on a stick.

I am so so scared just want to sleep and wake up when it's all over  

I have had 4 cycles 4 blood tests 4 heart breaking results   Can't help but think why this one will be different?  

It's like failing a driving exam 4 times and going in for a 5th, you just know your going to fail it again... That's how I'm feeling   goodness a blanket of sadness has really hugged me today....

Want this to be a yes so badly, just want to see my husband smile again... Not a good day for me,,,


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## cosmopolitan4112008 (Oct 18, 2013)

I had 0 symptoms.


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

Rania wishing all the best for you on Friday...xxx

We are all rooting for you!


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Rania - I've just read through your journey and want to send a huge hug   and lots and lots of  .  With regards to the work situation, I can empathize, I work in a school R/Y1 and we also have a Foundation 1 class where they come in from 2 yrs which I over see.  I took the full 2 weeks off as I knew there is no taking it easy at school with such young children.  This is my second week back and I'm so glad I was off for 2ww as it has been so busy and I'm sure the F1s think they've done something wrong as I've only popped in a few times!  As for the children bumping into you/ giving you an enthusiastic unpredictable hug, I was very concerned about this and my GP reassured me that the embryo is so snug inside that the level of force from a bump or cuddle wouldn't do anything untoward - you'd need a much greater intentional force.  I'm still very wary of the running about and hugs but he was very understanding (his wife is a teacher too).

Lots more        for you

Dory
xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you it is reassuring when i hear other women who got no symptoms. I hope thats me  

Congratulations Dory   I called in work and got the remaining of the week off. I know it is better for me "relaxed" at home for now. Thanking the lord they are very good with me. i just pray i didnt miss 10 days for nothing.
Staying home has driven me insane but hoping its all worth it and baby will snug in nicely  
Its reassuring to hear despite the bumps and hugs in the classroom will not effect baby x


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Good luck rania.  

Lots and lots of people get bfp with no symptoms.  Hope you will be one of them!!  Xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Morning ladies, wow it has been a very very long few months, lots of money and flying across the world, the day is here  

I am so worried and scared I honestly have a frozen feelings, I have had zero cramps, zero anything, woke up last few days drenched in sweat (night sweat?) again that can be anything some women say it's a sign others say no.

Breaks my heart into a zillion pieces seeing my husbands big brown eyes saying " I'm so scared we have been here too many times"   I told him I have cried screamed, lay on the bathroom floor howling like a pathetic human being and I certainly do not want to repeat those dark and painful" memories. I am very anxious as I have never seen a hcg in my life ever above 3   I see some wonderful results with women that get very very high results, mine are always between 1-3  

It's still very early to make A move to the clinic ( they do not believe doing it on stick) they want a blood hcg. Also I have not even been tempted to use a stick, that starch white result over and over again kills to the core   

Sat here all alone with crazy thoughts going through my head, it will either be the most amazing drive back from the clinic, or it will be the most heart breaking news this year   I sit here thinking does ivf even bloody work!? My 5th attempt this was suppose to be a male issue and all this set back  

I am a fool to go in too excited for protection I will just take it slowly, and just have a backup plan... Sad thing if it's a no, I have no other frosties so will have to start another fresh cycle that we can not afford any time soon   How complete my life will be in a few hours if it was a yes  

I am in two minds whether to inject clexane in my belly and take steroid and estrofem? But I need to "pretend" that everything is still ok and will see what happens,

Thank you all for your kind words and support it's meant so much to me xx will update you what happens, I would this so so so badly


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## Louisej29 (Nov 19, 2012)

Oh rania

I'm nervous fr you.  Keeping everything crossed for that good news.  

Keep us all posted.  Keep calm ! Positive thoughts coming your way

Xxx


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## RB76 (Jul 27, 2011)

I relate so much to all these feelings Rania and am sending you all the good luck vibes I can muster x


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## BUFFYBOXER (Dec 14, 2007)

Hi Rania been following you the last week just want to say hope all works out for you today ivf does work and it will for you.it took me 6 goes and 20 years of tryin and been to hell and back too many times will be thinkin of you both today x


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

My thoughts are with you Rania, really feel for you this morning


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

Thoughts and prayers are with you whatever the outcome xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

I did the blood tests and got the results within 1 hour, it came back 8.36 hcg. The guy on the phone said it is a positive pregnancy but on the low side? I have NEVER had anything above 3 in my life so hearing that number ok but my heart KNOWS its extremely low. I am being very realistic and praying so so hard that the embryo is just very very slow to implant today is 10days since transfer.

I called my dr in Dubai and she said "8 is a definite pregnancy but at this stage a little lower than she would like, either two things a bio chemical pregnancy OR a v v slow embryo" she wants me to test on Monday and get back to her. I asked her has she seen women with around 8 than go on to have babies? she said yes theres been cases where she thought the pregnancy is not valid with women with such low HCGS and gone on to have babies   I pray so so hard it is me.

My husband was crying when he heard positive and ordered a cake, He asked me why am i not too excited? i said its way too early for anything at the moment and with all the googling i have done in the last 6 years that HCG number isnt something to get too excited about  

Any ladies have any positive stories off women with low HCGS, again another few days off waiting.

I am back to work on Monday will take it easy and go soon after. Thank you again for all your kind words of support.

I am more anxious now than i was in the morning.


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## Teeinparis (Sep 15, 2013)

Wow, congrats.  Maybe try Accupuncture in the next day or to to help it go forth and stick.  Fingers crossed!


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## KittyK (Jan 19, 2014)

Hi Rania

I have been following your story and it's great to hear you gave a positive result. Ok it's on the low side but with some positive thinking and taking it easy you will give your little bean the very best chance. Take a look at some of the videos on here http://www.tryingtogetpregnant.co.uk by marisa peer to give you some   She is a hypnotist and is a big believer in the mind body connection and above you need to tell yourself your baby is on the way.

Sending you lots of positive energy for a big hcg jump on Monday.

Kk

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that FertilityFriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## artist_mum (Jun 19, 2012)

Rania

I saw your story when you first posted - and strangely, I just looked again today to find that you are testing.  I think I'm connected to your journey!  

I'm sending you really positive vibes and wishing you rising hcg    Just hang on in there..


Artist xx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Thank you ladies I need everyone's prayers so much right now   

I will try that website kitty xx as the power of the mind is very strong.

I have been googling a lot and read it's not the initial number that should be concerning as long as it's over 5 and rises every 42 hours, I pray very hard it was such a v v slow start and soon will catch up xx

After 6 years this is the first time I ever heard " yes it is a positive pregnant " so wished the number was much much higher even 18. My aim is to focus on that number8 and visualise it being higher after the weekend


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

Rania - Sending lots and lot of positive thoughts your way to help your embie over the weekend and give you reassurance at Monday's bloods  

Dory
xxx


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

Hi rania...prayers with you..hope this it for you...xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

Such a long and painful journey   Dropped down to 3.2

Some people say above 5 is a yes some say above 25. Mine went from 8 to 3.2  

Really exhausted and upset with everything now. Do I want a 6th Cycle? how much more can i take? I called them in Dubai "stop all medication and bleeding should start within 4 days" that really hit me.

why cant it just work for me!? why do women have 1-3 IVFS and are pregnant so easily and for me its like impossible   we have paid for ALL 5 transfers and medications its sucking me out of everything  

Tired and fed up with it all         started trying when i was 26 now i am 32 and just nothing


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## Leftleg (Oct 30, 2011)

I'm so sorry Rania, you've been so patient I can only imagine how sad and frustrated you must be feeling. I hope you can find comfort in your husband and family and take some time out to be kind to yourself. I know it doesn't feel like it but time is on your side and hopefully someone will find an answer soon so that you can have success next time around. Don't give up hope   xxx


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

Hi Rania
I'm sorry to hear your news.....I cant imagine how hard it is for.  Thinking of you. XXX


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## Moonface kitty (Aug 6, 2013)

So sorry to hear how things  turned out Rania, have been following your post for some time now and was really hoping for the best for you .


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## Dory10 (Aug 6, 2013)

So sorry to read this Rania  

Dory
xxx


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## Rania82 (Jan 5, 2013)

thank you ladies for your kind words, i have had a good cry got it out of my system. drugs are all in the kitchen cupboard, seriously it is deja vu   My doctor will call me tomorrow from Dubai for a phone consultation on what she thinks etc etc
I will just take the call and ask the question that i seem to ask a 1000 times "what should i do different next time?"  

Its like every time a cycle fail its a very painful cry that comes from the pits of my stomach. I never ever cry as hard as i do when a cycle fails. I guess I wanted it so so badly, and I thought i would have hugged and kissed my husband a happy new year with a huge bump! waiting for the Februrary baby   gosh how many due dates have come and gone in my case  

Looking forward for work tomorrow just preparing for the little ones. I guess back to reality and I should put these painful weeks behind me. my husband keeps saying "is this it? is it over? no more waiting?" seriously its been a build up all this time and that a huge bang and nothing to show for it  

When i find the strength we may consider the 6th go, do not want to think about a fresh cycle just yet, very very painful.

Sorry i have not done many personals. Congratulations on the pregnant ladies x the ones that are trying and the ones that have called it a day x May the Lord bless us all one way or another x


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## KittyK (Jan 19, 2014)

Rania

Really sorry to hear this, understandably it is hard to take. Take some time out and be kind to yourself  

I wondered if you have tried to improve your DHs sperm? There are loads of things you can do nutritionally and lifestyle wise.  My OHs have improved from 2 to 60% motility with supplements. There is also DNA fragmentation testing. 

When you have given yourself some time maybe investigate other clinics. I'm with argc and they monitor you every day to give you the best chance. It's pricey but they get results. Definitely worth a look. 

All the best to you. 

X


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Sending you so many   Rania. I am so sorry xxx


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

So sorry about your loss Rania, after everything you've been through... Xxx


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## artist_mum (Jun 19, 2012)

so sorry to hear this Rania, all the best to you sending  . xx

Have you investigated any other places?  Serum in Greece is very good at taking a personal approach - a protocol designed just for you.  Maybe worth a look when you find the strength.  You do have time on your side, still young…  Wishing you a blessed future xx


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