# adopting a new born baby



## leanne2005 (Dec 2, 2004)

has any one adopted a new born baby and how long did it take from the first phone call please? thank you


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## KarenM (Jul 30, 2002)

Leanne

Sorry to shatter your dreams, but it is very rare to adopt a new born baby.  I think the youngest we have had on here was 5 months and that was with adopting an older sibling too.

We adopted two girls who were 2 and 13 months and the whole process took us 22 months.

Good luck though
Karen x


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## Boomerang girl (Jan 24, 2004)

Hi Leanne,
some LAs now run cuncurrency schemes. Ours does, although we are not going for this as I would find it too gut wrenching.

What happens (from what I understand) is that where it is known before the birth that the Birth Mother is not likely to successfully parent (due to past history) the baby goes straight to "foster to adopters"- who foster the baby, then over the next several months steps are taken where appropriate to give the birth mum chances to succeed at parenting- regular visits, supervised parenting etc. at the end of a planned period of time a decision is made if the baby can return to its birth Mum or not. Then the foster carers adopt the baby.

Generally babies are not placed in the concurrency scheme unless it is very unlikely they will return to their Birth Mum, but there is always a chance, and the foster to adopters need to be aware of this and be able to be supportive to the process of bonding between birth mum and baby. I think in the area close to us, from nine babies placed one was returned and the rest adopted.

The benefits are that the baby doesn't have the trauma of a move from foster carers to adopters, and that the adopters take home a newborn(often) baby.  The thing I would find really too hard is if you have to give the baby back. After all the ttc emotions and waiting so long to adopt I don't think we could cope with that disappointment.  Some people feel very differently and I know one woman who has done so twice and has two lovely little ones!

I think superal knows much more about this. 

The criterea for eligability varies too.

Hope that is helpful. Other than that as Karen says babies tend to be a little older before they are placed in their adoptive families- legal matters need to be cleared up even if the baby is placed in care straight from birth.

I know a couple who adopted a baby relinquished at birth, and even she spent three months in foster care.

kylie
x


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Hi Leeanne

Kylie is right in everything she says about concurrent planning, I've done this scheme and we have experienced a baby being returned through this scheme.

It is true that you are most probably get a "new" baby, the age does vary through out, our baby was 3 months old where as our firends baby was just 5 days old.  Don't quote me on this but I think our firends were the first to get such a young baby.

The scheme is very good for the children placed on it, it means they do not go from pillar to post and cause as much upset in their young life.  It takes a very strong person to be able to do this scheme, I must have been one of them as I've got through it, even though at the time it broke our heart when our baby was returned.

Think long and hard about if you could do this scheme, if the answer is yes then you may have the opportunity to have such a young baby BUT we warned it has happened where a baby has been returned and it will happen again, otherwise the scheme would not be successfully.

Their is a member on this sight who has decided to go down this route and may reply to give you more up to date information.

Like Karen has said the chances of a very young baby down the traditional route is very scarce, I did eventually go on to adopt a baby girl of 9 months down the traditional route.

wishing you lots of luck in what ever you decided.

Love Superal
xx


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## Donna Taylor (Dec 23, 2004)

Hi,

This thread is very interesting I had never heard of concurrancy before while I don't think it si for me or DH as I know I wouldn't be strong enough to give a baby back. It does sound like a great scheme and I am sure it helps lots of mummy's adoptive or birth!

To answer your other questions our LA have said whole process from first phone call to going to pannel should take between 6-9 months! so we are really hoping to be a family by next christmas but do realise the reality that it could take longer to be matched!

Donna xx


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