# What exactly do your LA/VA ask your work reference?



## Lizard39 (Nov 25, 2011)

Hello  

Would you mind sharing what exactly your LA/VA asked your work in their reference letter? Plus what is the objective of the work reference? If its just to confirm I have worked there for xx years and my salary is xx then surely I can just ask HR to provide that under the pretence it's for a mortgage? Also, if its just to confirm that, it makes me even more annoyed because we can provide payslips, plus looking at my hubbies they can see financially I don't have to work.

I am really struggling with the whole work reference. I have a new boss who started afew weeks ago and is based in USA & I don't see any benefit what so ever in them knowing I will hopefully be going on adoption leave next year. My job is nothing to do with children, so what exactly do our LA want to know? 

I think what really annoys me is that during our Prep Group the SW's were going on about how they used to want adopters to take 12 months off post placement but it today's economic environment they appreciate that is difficult financially and with job uncertainty and redundancies etc. Yet they aren't thinking about that part up front re the work reference. I love my job, but we do have regular redundancies and I just feel I could be more exposed if they know I'm not going to be around next year - and if I'm honest I've worked hard for 20 years and actually feel I deserve adoption leave & pay (my company who i have been with for 6 years has a really good policy & we have told our SW I will be taking a minimum of 12months off). 

I have already told my SW that I want work references not sent out til end of process, but I think I'll actually end up talking to her about why she needs a work reference full stop ( as she won't get a character reference from my work - they just don't do them). 

Sorry - ended up being a bit of a rant! Any insight appreciated! 

Thanks 

Lizard 

PS. Absolutely no-one at my work knows about my previous IVF cycles, miscarriage and adoption process


----------



## Sun Flower (Jul 14, 2008)

Hi Lizard.

Our employer references were not as in-depth as family and friends ones. As far as I can gather, from a chat with DH boss, the questions were, how long have they known you, how long have you worked for the company, how many days off sick, what s your job role, would they employ you again, in their opinion will you make good adoptive parents and why? (I personally thought this question was abit odd for employers to answer), what skills experience do we have, any other comments......that was it really. I think they have to provide a phone / email add too, so that SW can contact them if they want to know more info. 

Obviously each LA / VA has slightly different forms and questions, but hopefully that gives you a rough idea

Sun flower xx


----------



## Lizard39 (Nov 25, 2011)

Thanks for sharing Sunflower. I really have nothing to hide, I'm a good corporate citizen, work hard, have had no random sick days since joining - but OMG I just think its so out of order. I am so uncomfortable with this. My boss or HR wouldn't be able to answer those questions about me plus who are they to comment if I would make a good adoptive parent.


----------



## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

I thought it was more of a safe guarding / integrity check more have you been involved in disciplinary procedures or shown to be a concerning character e.g. horribly persistently bullying a colleague.  Ours are any way as you say WTF can they say about you as a potential parent.  I know some people who are very ruthless at work because that is the industry but they are loving parents at home. Work me and home me are very separate and different.


----------



## gettina (Apr 24, 2009)

Hi lizard
I can't help with your q I'm afraid but I wanted to agree with your complaint. I was livid about it. My co is perhaps similar - large, regular rounds of job cuts in recent years, male manager, run from london, deep down we're all just a salary cost etc. I made it clear to my sw that my work ref had to be delivered as late in the process as poss and i needed warning in advance so i could tell my manager about my adoption plans and that a ref would be coming. She put if off a month but that's all. I am left praying this has no repercussions for me prior to getting adoption leave - after all these years of seeing all the other women get two or three lots of maternity leave....
It puts us in a vulnerable position when they want us to be stable. It shows all the lack of commercial reality and savviness that I would expect from the public sector (sorry to some of you).

I asked for it to go to hr which would have been slightly better but no it had to be my manager "who knows me and can comment on me" I know it asked how long I had worked there because he had to ask me but that's all - he filled it in privately. 

 good luck. I didn't make my feelings particularly known - just expressed my concerns, delayed it a little and bit my tongue. 
Gettina x


----------



## Barbados Girl (Jul 7, 2012)

Hey guys

I agree that this is outrageous.  I am so lucky that my direct boss is awesome and I have a great relationship with her/  But if you don't have that... Obviously your work cannot discriminate against you for maternity/adoption issues but we all know that,in reality, they can.  I think it is outrageous that the social workers have this blinkered policy- so one size fits all!


----------



## Smudgey (Mar 13, 2012)

My direct boss is great ,I also work for a huge company and I was upfront with my boss and HR throughout the process , in Oct 2012 we got told there were 70% redundancies in my job role and I panicked as my employers were aware of the adoption plan , but we hadn't gone on the prep course so not 'officially ' in the process ! 
We deferred the prep course from Nov 2012 to Feb 2013 as I needed my adoption leave for financial reasons , luckily I kept my job , please try not to worry xxxx


----------



## Smudgey (Mar 13, 2012)

Ps we didn't have our work refs sent till right at end of HS xxx


----------



## Macgyver (Oct 27, 2008)

Hi lizard, I had the same issue when it came to a reference for work, my boss had only been there two months. I explained that to our sw who said that I could just give hr address and that would be fine.  They were more then happy with the reference they got from hr.  just advise your sw and I am sure they will understand. Good luck in your journey xx


----------



## Starmaker73 (Jun 28, 2013)

Can I just ask where the section is that you give your work address so that a reference request can be sent out?  I can't find anything in the Form F, it's only asking for the company name.  There was nothing in my application form either.  I'm wondering if maybe we don't need them in my LA or will my SW just ask for the address randomly?  My work situation is very complicated (I work by myself in Scotland and my Line Manager and HR Dept are in England, I've only met them a few times) so although I have nothing to hide, a reference seems weird.


----------

