# sleep/weaning/ crying/bedtime etc etc



## lizzylou (Aug 29, 2006)

Hi

I hope you are well!

I have written to you b4 about my twins not sleeping and since then we have introduced a routine of bathtime feed etc every night for the last 8 weeks! (now 16 weeks)

We did initially win the battle for a few weeks and nothing has changed other than one twin just hates going to bed!! She cries as soon as she is put down. (the other has taken to the routine and is able to settle herself most nights! 

I am not sure if she is hungry, scared or has a tummy ache etc etc but i feed her for ages. I have left her to cry but an hour later she is in a right state and i wonder if she is just to young to be left to cry and will it make her more insecure about bedtime. i def dont want that esp when she is older!

We tried a top up formula bottle last week ( on advise of HV) and she was soooooooooo ill puking and then almost passing out that we had to call the paramedics!! It also made no differecne to her going down any easier. i wondered about trying some baby rice so that it rules out hunger as breast milk is far thinner at night esp when she is on my breast every hour from around 5ish!!!

she can get her self to sleep after a feed in the night from being awake in her cot which makes me think its either tummy ache or just fear of going to bed, she also only wakes once maybe twice once we finally have got her down!!

any suggestions? sorry about the long winded message, its amazing i have had the time  

look forward to hearing form you soon

Lizzylou

p.s know of any good wrinkle cream!!!!?


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## lilmizfury (Mar 12, 2006)

hiya lizzylou,

sorry you are having a bad time at the moment. 
My suggestions are as follows,
carry on with your bedtime routine as you are..... either feed, bath then bed or bath feed then bed (which ever is best for you)!  Put your babies down whilst awake and kiss them goodnight and leave the room. At this age i wouldnt say to leave them to cry for more than 2 mins as they are still only young and will prob just get themselves in a state. we only really say to use the check-in method with older babies and children.  
babies and children are alot more clever than we give them credit for...... the main thing is to persevere!
maybe if you feel as though you seem to be feeding alot then try offering cooled boiled water instead of milk (only if your baby is getting enough in 24 hours) as this could just be a comfort thing of knowing you are there. (i had this problem with my DD)!!

hope this has helped!

let me know how you go on


shell xx


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## lilmizfury (Mar 12, 2006)

sorry........ one more thing.......

its not recommended to start weaning until 6 months. You babies are getting enough goodness from your milk at the moment and may have trouble digesting any foods just yet so try to hold back from that.

Does your health visiting team not run sleep groups?
it may be worth you speaking to her and asking for advice leaflets or groups eg. sleep, weaning etc..... these are very useful!!


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## lizzylou (Aug 29, 2006)

hi

the trouble with that is then she disturbs her sister. also what do you recommend i do after 2 mins when i return  i have tried stroking rocking shhhing and just laying my hand on her chest/tummy etc and she gets in an even worse state bright red arching of back and kicking etc

i do think i am used as comfort a bit too 

did try the water once...........madam didnt like it at all the face was a picture!!

lizzy


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## lilmizfury (Mar 12, 2006)

it is a tough one! Your babies are still only young so its hard to suggest something because you are already doing it!  All i can say is carry on with the bedtime routine and just persevere, as she becomes older she will more than likely become more settled. Although it doesnt feel to you like you are getting anywhere at the moment i can assure you perseverence will pay off!  

It would be good for you to contact your HV team and see if they run any sleep groups in your area. You will get to meet others in the same situation, some better, some worse but you will see what advice we as health professionals give. The sleep groups are really good and parents with children of all ages are invited although as i said before we dont advise that you use the check in method on young babies.

let me know how you go on.

shell xx


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## lizzylou (Aug 29, 2006)

Hi

thanks for the advise!! I tried rubbing the tummy of a beside herself baby today and hey it worked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    she was crying and screaming because she was so tired and i had decided a formal nap time which she didnt like!

can i poss ask one more question (before you become sick of me )

why is it advised not to used controlled cryine/check in method on younger babies? what are the consequences of it??

lizzy
xx


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## lilmizfury (Mar 12, 2006)

its not recommended as they are still only baby babies and dont really understand yet and can be very distressing for them and you.  At this age babies still need to feel close to their carers as a form of security. Im not sure if there is any evidence on effects the check in mothod can cause for a baby this age but like i said they dont really understand just yet.

I did leave my baby when she was 5 months to cry for just 2 mins at a time because i found it very distressing for the both of us. She eventually started to settle!
The thing is once you finally get her to settle doesnt mean its going to be fine from then on....... they tend to go through stages with their sleeping patterns but like i said its just perseverence (as im beinning to find out once again)!  
there are many factors that can`effect the baby sleeping eg, teething, illness, hunger ect

its very complicated and i can really relate to parents going through this as i myself am struggling with my daughter at the moment who has decided that waking up at 3am to come in mummy's bed is a good idea thanks to daddy's weakness!!  
good luck!

shell xxx


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