# Adoption & long term anxiety/depression



## EverHopefulmum (Sep 23, 2009)

Hello, I'm currently undergoing my 3rd and either way probably final ivf treatment. If this isn't successful, me and DH think it's probably time to call it quits. However I have one question I really would like some advise on before we say goodbye to treatment and put all our eggs in the adoption basket.


My DH has suffered with anxiety & depression since he was 17 (now 33), and despite various different counseling and therapy sessions to try and get to the "root cause" has had to remained on 150mg of seteraline a day (I believe this is quite a high dose, but have no real comparison). Since taking the tablets, all of his symtoms have been under control and his day to day life is unaffected, never taking time off work for his condition etc. However, everytime he tries to lower the dose the symptoms return. Will this affect our ability to adopt?


I'm really worried that we will take months/years applying for adoption only to be rejected when i'm at an age where IVF is too late.  Plus I would hate DH to feel that any rejection was "his fault".


I'd appreciate your knowledge/experience.


thanks
Shelly
x


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## Boggy (Dec 13, 2006)

Hi Shelly

I'm afraid this is one of those questions that where you live can make a big difference.    Some agencies will say he has to be off all medications, others will say it's fine.  I'd advise phoning your local agency and asking what their policy is.

If you do a search, you'll find lots more people who have been in this situation and I'm sure some others will post their experiences too.  

Bx


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## Daizy (Feb 25, 2011)

Hi Shelly,

I had similar concerns in the early stages of our application. 

I went through a period of anxiety after our ICSI treatment, I was quite depressed too. It lasted about 3 years in total, i.e. from noticing/recognising that I was feeling out of the ordinary levels of anxiety and visiting my GP, to it peaking (and me barely leaving the house for months!) to it gradually receding until I was back to ‘normal’ (I say ‘normal’ because I do still get the odd anxiety attack, and sure the adoption process is very stressful so I’ve had a few in recent months lol). 
I discussed it with our SW early on. She indicated that the two main factors which could make it an issue were: 
1) If it was unresolved, i.e. if I was still on medication (I never actually took medication, well I tried it and it wasn’t right for me – I did have CBT though which proved an absolute godsend). 
2) Prognosis - had it been for a prolonged period as opposed to a reactive episode.

Our SW also explained that health issues wouldn’t necessarily stop us from being approved however it could be an issue with children’s SW’s.
I agree with Boggy, speak to your LA or to local agencies early on and find out the gen with them.

Anxiety is an affliction I wouldn’t wish on anyone, having been a sufferer I have a huge empathy with anyone going through it thus I wish your hubby all the very best and hope he continues to find some relief from it.


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## EverHopefulmum (Sep 23, 2009)

Boggy & Daisy, thank you so much for replying so soon. It's definitely a worry that will affect any application, it seems so frustrating that this wouldn't be an issue if we could conceive ourselves, but I will take you advise and ask our surrounding agencies what there policy is. 


Surely it's better that he is on medication and stable than coming off the meds, getting approved and then going downhill after we have a child placed.


Thanks Again.
Shelly
x


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