# FET after mmc with IVF - so scared - what do you think my chances are?



## mememe (Nov 11, 2007)

Hi all - I know there is no real answer to this, but I guess I'm just looking for hope after the worst week of my life. 

We were lucky enough to get a BFP after our first IVF in April. Everything was going really well - heartbeat at 6+5, heartbeat at 8 weeks, then last week at 9+5 we were told our baby had died. I had an ERPC straight away as I knew it was the only way I could deal with it - but of course, I'm not dealing with it at all.

I've already had a chat with my consultant as I am so desperate to get going again. We have 2 blasts frozen (good quality but not 'top' quality apparently). I am so scared that a) it won't work and more scared that b) it will, and I will have another m/c and go through this again. He says I am a good candidate for FET as the embryo implanted successfully but I can't help but think the success rates are quite low and maybe I should just start again with a fresh cycle?

We are extremely fortunate to have a beautiful 4 year old - naturally conceived - god knows how. We have been ttc for 3 years with not even a hint of success. Tests show we are 'unexplained' although as one of my DH's sperm results was borderline they suggested with our first tx that we 'hedge our bets' and do half IVF/half ICSI. I had 2 IVF blasts put back last time. The 2 that are frozen are both ICSI. Will that make any difference to the chances of success?

I am 36, DH is 38.

Any advice or thoughts would be so welcome.
xxxxx


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## birdey (Jan 19, 2009)

hi 
im so sorry to hear about you loss, its so hard to come to terms with it and i know how you feel, our 1st attemp ended in miscarraige and i felt the same, just did 2nd attempt and was stopped due to ohss but doing fet this month. its really hard to think about trying again and what the outcome will be, but what i have to do is focus on what the outcome could be and that keeps me going, i have my bad days still about losing our baby i dont think that will ever change. this treatment is so hard and there are so many emotions that come with it, im just pleased i have found this site as its really helped me through it, if you feel down the girls seem to pick you up answer any questions. just makes you realise you are not alone. please take some time and speak to you rclinic about options. we had to wait 3 months after our loss which felt like forever but actually gave me chnace to get my head reasonably straight.
take care of yourself
kirst x


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## Tinx (Sep 2, 2005)

Hi there

I have not had a m/c so I am sorry that I cannot offer advice or thoughts on that, but I just wanted to send you both my love. I have a beautiful daughter thanks to IVF, and have just gone through FET, I test a week on Monday. I am so scared of the results, scared of what could happen even if I do get the wonderful bfp, but, as birdey says, I just try and focus on what could and should be and that keeps me going. I have highs and lows and have many tears as its such a rollercoaster but ultimately, if tx were to work, its all worth it.

I am so amazed and impressed by your strength and courage and I really just wanted to wish you both boundless luck and happiness. I am so sorry for your losses and the traumatic events that surrounded them; nothing will take away your pain or your memories, but I hope that you will find peace and be able to journey forward.

Take care and all the very very best, love Tinx xxx


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## Tinkelbunny (Jan 9, 2009)

mememe what medication will you be on for the FET?

the norm is to go on prednisilone 20-25mg, clexan and gestone 100-200ml.

there is also studies that have shown that progesterone should be increased..even to a level where you could be taking a double dose ie 100ml twice a day.

you don't have to have NK cells to be on prednisilone...we all have them naturally in our bodies..hence the norm of being prescribed them.

good luck xxx


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## mememe (Nov 11, 2007)

Hi - thank you all SO much for replying.

Tinkelbunny - I don't know about medication yet. I've got a follow-up appointment next week. From the initial chat I had I got the impression that there wouldn't really be much medication at all, but any advice you have about what I should be asking would be really helpful.

I am going to talk to the consultant about progesterone. I think I have some kind of 'issue' with this. With my first (natural) pregnancy I was found to have very low progesterone levels - the doctor actually told me that they were so low the pregnancy would probably not continue. Well, thank god it did. With this IVF pregnancy, again, despite 2 x 400mg of cyclogest a day, my progesterone levels were still described as 'very low'. They increased my cyclogest to 4 x 400mg per day and added a 50ml gestone injection too. Sadly, as you saw from my original post, it didn't work out. I guess I will never really know why.

Have you had FET? 

xxxxx


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## Tinkelbunny (Jan 9, 2009)

mememe

yes i've had FET.

i think you should insist on the drugs, have a read back on the FET threads and you will see  how it has helped others.


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## Skirtgirl (Mar 17, 2008)

Hi mememe I am so sorry for your loss it is heartbreaking and painful. My first advice to you would be to deal with it first and grieve if it makes you feel better. I had a mmc in Jan and refused to let it get me down at the time, you know 'it is all for the best, must move on now' and all that but it caught up with me in the end!
I have just had a fet and am testing in a few days and yes I am scared it wont work or that it will and I will m/c again. However I was also scared not to try again! Like you I have had a pregnancy go to term so there is every reason for it to work, just maybe not this time.
As regards meds talk to your consultant about what he thinks is best there is no magic drug regimen, a lot of what Tink talks about is for ladies with immune issues rather than the norm.

Good luck for your follow up and take your time, there is no rush, those snow babies are going no where!!!!!


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## Tinkelbunny (Jan 9, 2009)

Skirtgirl

i don't have any immune issues. the prednisilone dose prescribed helps prevent the natural killer cells present in your womb from attacking the embryo.

proginova helps to build the womb lining, the timing of FET is important, there is a small window and if the lining isn't the right thickness this will reduce the success of the FET.

Aspirin and clexan helps thinning the blood. as much as we hate it our blood becomes a bit sticky and doesn't flow as well as it should 

all the above listed drugs are near enough the normal drugs you can expect if you are on a medicated FET, part of them are used during a natural FET.

mememe i am so sorry to hear about your m/c, i had one March this year and it was so hard to pick myself up from it. your fear is something us 'old timers' understand xxx


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## Skirtgirl (Mar 17, 2008)

Tink, I thought the natural killer cells were part of the imune issue?? That what I was told anyway. I was also told by several Dr that unless blood tests( and forgive me I cant remember which ones but I know they are multiple) show that you have probs there really is no need to take any steroids etc. I agree clexane and aspirin are for thinning the blood but again have been told that if you dont have 'sticky blood' then there is no need for them and in fact clexane can be more harmful than helpful

IVI val said they dont want me to take anything other than progynova and progesterone supps. That said I am taking other things as well as I took them in my sucessful cycle and feel nervous without.

I think the main thing is there is no magic regimen but lots of things that can be tried.


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## Tinkelbunny (Jan 9, 2009)

hmm there are a few of us having had FET and prednisilone is prescribed as standard ...now the dose varies.... some clinics keep it at 10mg and other push it right up to 25mg. and none of them have immune issues. we all have killer cells and i think it's given to increase the success rate of FET's..but know for sure even though i don't have a NK cell issues i won't be having FET without them..no point wasting the cost if it's not going to work.

know what you are on about using stuff to make sure it all works for you.

ask your clinic for some..there is no harm. it is a cortizone and can have an effect on your blood pressure...not heard of any complaints yet...but increases your success. they won't let me have clexane...also did all of the tests but at 41 my blood is not free flowing as it whould be at 21...normal in ivf is a different yard stick.


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

mememe - ive had ectopic and miscarriage. as u can see fet worked for me


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## Tinkelbunny (Jan 9, 2009)

AQ i was reading your diary this morning...brilliant and it gives us all hope. thanks for typing it all up.


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

ah thanks tinklebunny - its certainly been an interesting last 12 months! not sure how im still standing! yeah the diary full of ups and downs, its the hardest thing ive ever had to go through and i will never forget the heartache. i hope you all get ur dream, just keep trying, thats all u can do intit


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## birdey (Jan 19, 2009)

hi avon queen did it help you to do the diary, im thinking of it as thought it might help to get it all out when its so up and down all the time?
kirst x


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

birdey - yeah i think it did help me. i did an ivf bfn diary as well, which was alot shorter   
it helped to let it all out, have a good rant. better out than in!!! although i do think i got a little obsessed with fertility friends which wasnt that healthy as somedays would sit in my pjs all day on here. but in a way i think i must have needed that at the time


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## mememe (Nov 11, 2007)

HI - these replies are helping so much. AQ - I just hope that I have the same success with FET as you have! My latest preoccupation is that the 2 blasts I have won't survive the thaw.

Also I've been obsessively searching about what my chances of this working are. I have 2 pretty good blasts - why, if they survive the thaw are your chances lower than with a fresh cycle? I would have thought that if the blasts or embies make it through, then you're on a level playing field compared with a fresh cycle

I'm trying so hard to find someone who can tell me it will work!! But I know no-one can tell me that. 

Some stats I've found put my chances as low as about 10%. That's a grim thought at the moment.

xxxx


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## Avon Queen (Jul 8, 2007)

mememe - i hope you have the same success as me too        i was worried mine wouldent survive thaw, even though i had more left over i was wanting them to survive and not perish, the thought of any of them perishing wasnt nice   its all a game of chance, if its gonna work its gonna work, you can look at it as much as you like, but you just have to wait and see, which is the cruelist thing of all. its all that not knowing, not knowing the outcome. i dont know if your chances are less than with a fresh cycle, i worried about that as well. but with my fresh ivf my ovaries were soooo sore, and i was drugged up. with the natural fet i had no drugs and was more relaxed as less trips to hospital etc, so even though the embies were defrosted ones, i was fresher !! - if u get me!! the way i look back now, i think if the first ivf had worked then i wouldent have had anymore kids, and therefore my little boys wouldent exist. whats meant to be is meant to be.

if you take pregnacare plus vitamins and eat 5 fruit/veg a day, and TRY to behave as you would normally (yeah i know!!) then you have as good a chance as anyone


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## birdey (Jan 19, 2009)

hi ladies
mememe - hope you are feeling better about your tx, keep positive sending you hugs  
kirst x


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