# Single girls having/considering IVF



## Damelottie

For those of us on the IVF journey!

I have pretty much decided to have one IVF go in the New Year. I don't think I could ever afford more than one go - will probably struggle to afford that to be honest!

I have a question already! Do people go abroad because its cheaper?

Love

Emma xx


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## kylecat

good idea emma to have these two threads. Your plans for next year sound exciting!! 
I will have 4 or 5 goes at IUI and then if it hasnt worked by the end of 2008 I will head down the IVF route. I've kind of decided that in my mind! Not sure if this would be helpful to you but when I went to the London Womens Clinic in October I saw that they offered a 3 cycle IVF package for roughly £5000 - may be worth investigating.

My sister had IVF treatment 5 years ago at the ARGC clinic in London - she is now the proud mummy to twin boys who turn four very soon!! 

Good luck everyone love katiexxx


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## suitcase of dreams

Ooh, here's the IVF thread already - fast work Em  

I replied on the other thread, but I think people do go abroad because of cost. But also ease and speed of getting appts vs UK - especially compared to NHS. And if you need donor eggs, much easier to get overseas too....

Think the 3 IVF package at LWC is only available to under 35s, but not definite on that - might be worth checking the website though - is a shame as that's really good value I thought.

I'm thinking of 3 IUI and then will re-consider. When this was all just a vague idea, I thought I'd do 6 and then see, but now I'm getting more and more impatient and just want to be pregnant.....and IVF does have much higher success rate. I'm just a bit worried about the time off work etc needed for IVF and how I would handle that. So let's see how the first few IUIs go in the New Year and then I'll make my decision. Maybe it will work first time with IUI and I won't have to worry about it - although I don't suppose I will get that lucky  

Laura
x


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## Damelottie

Hi Katie

Gosh - that does sound like a good deal at the LWC. I shall def look into that.

Its a difficult decision - how long to do iui for before moving on IVF - assuming we need to of course! Its just a personal choice for me but I just cannot afford to do both - so will go for the full ivf instead of trying more iui's. I think I'd like to be reassured about my egg quality and the the sperm is at least meeting the blooming egg and starting to fertislise!

I had a hycosy in 2005 and all looked ok but its egg quality/amount that worries me. I don't think there's anyway to check that without IVF.

Great news about your sister. Was she single?

I'm watching My Fair Lady - great xmas film

Emma xx


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## Damelottie

Hi Laura

Our posts crossed. Oh bum - I might be too old for the LWC deal then   .

No reason at all why you shouldn't be one of the lucky ones and be pal first time. Its happned to a few on here hun. I think Sam and Kimberley were both first goers


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## suitcase of dreams

Em - I'm not 100% sure on that LWC deal though so worth checking it out....

Trying not to get too excited about it working first time, or even second time round, because if it doesn't then I'll have further to fall if that makes any sense? Really hard to keep emotions in check on this one - must try to find a hobby for next year so I don't get obsessive about getting pregnant....any ideas?!

Laura
x


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## kylecat

Hi emma - just to let you know that my sister was married when she had IVF - they'd been trying for 2/3 years - she went down the NHS route first I think and they put her on a drug called Clomid. Then she went to the ARGC and it was discovered that she had severe endometriosis - her tubes were twisted and beyond repair. Anyway to cut a long story short, she had IVF and now has her twins

Katiexx


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## ♥JJ1♥

Emma so pleased that you have made a decision about TTC, LWC package is for 38 years and under so you may be in luck- not sure when you turn 39!
http://www.londonwomensclinic.com/treatments/ivf_package.html
My friend did it and got pregnant twice on it!

Abroad is much cheaper and IM Barcelona/Madrid also do 3 for 2 packages. Ask the Reprofit girls about Czech and some on the abroadies thread go to Eastern Europe. If I need donor eggs I will try Barcelona (if I get a lining that every thickens up!).

Maybe ask you GP to do the bloods etc so that all that is up to date and your hormone bloods on your next period. 
Take care and very excited for you.
L xx


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## Damelottie

Thats brilliant JJ1 - thank you so much.
I'm 39 in May so if I get a wriggle on...............

Last time my GP helped with nothing at all!
I'll try again - what do I need to ask for? Can somebody remind me?

Emma xx


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## ♥JJ1♥

Ring LWC and ask for a pack and the nurse that you want a more meaningful consultation so want to get prepared (also saves time waiting for cd1) but usually clinics want
FSH, LH, prolactin and oestrodial on day 1-3 (some say 1-5), blood group,
HIV, rubella, CMV, syphillis and chlamdyia, HEp B and C - you can get the HIV and sexual heath done at your local GUM clinic free just say that you are out of a relationship etc etc as they can charge you for other things my friend is a sexual health nurse and don't charge sexual health workers but they charge actors in the sex industrry for their certificates (they can't work without them), ask GP for CMV and reubella.
Good Luck
L x

So exciting for you.


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## Felix42

Hello all, good to see there's an IVF thread too now.  If this IUI doesn't work though     it does, then I'm all steam ahead with IVF.  I could only go for one go but would certainly hope for frosties just in case I need to go for a Frozen Embryo Transfer following that which would cost about the same as another IUI I think.  Anyway good luck to all and hope you are having a great Christmas.

Felix xx


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## ♥Jovial♥

Oooh Emma, congratulations on your decision to get things starting, how exciting!  

xxx


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## Damelottie

Hi all
My heads done in already!!

Where to have the treatment. I do fancy the lwc because of the deal but it would be so difficult regarding scans etc. I wonder if they have one of those satellite places nearer to here.

Thanks JJ1 for the bloods info. I bet my crap GP's won't help   

Emma xxxx


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## Mazzzz

Emma, really pleased to hear you are moving forward and going for IVF - best of luck with your plans. 

Maz xx


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## Zoopy

Ah, this is a really useful thread. Thank you everyone. I've been thinking about how to go about treatment. 

Because I potentially am doing it with a known donor, and because a clinic would have to quarantine his sperm for six months, time I don't feel I have without trying something, I was planning this:

3 months starting January optimising my health and happiness, (STI screens, supplements etc)
3 months DIY at home with a kit (I pretty much know this won't work, but hey for £20 why not try?)
3 IUI (am I right in thinking people do this first before IVF because it is less invasive, fewer drugs and cheaper?)
3 IVF

Then, maybe DE (donor egg, abbriev right? I can't find the link to the glossary), but i think i would wait to do this with a partner of my own. 

I need to get a consultant to talk me through the plan of course. But would be keen to know what others who have been through the process think?? Someone said that with my test results I might be a 'low responder'. AMH of 0.8, inhibin B a scary 15. SHould i go straight to IVF?

I had a scan, btw, this May, to remove a coil that got lost (!!!) and it showed healthy tubes, no cysts, ovaries fine albeit one quite a bit smaller than the other. 

Is IUI sometimes assisted with Clomid (does that stimulate ovulation?)

Has anyone had the new mild IVF, which pumps much lower doses of hormone? I read in the Guardian that it is considered by some to be better than normal IVF for low responders and much lower risk of related illness / cancer. 

Oh, and for those of you who I've got to know a little on the other boards, and the very kind members who answered my post about being broken-hearted, I've arrived home today to find a letter in my post with what i think is my ex-boyfriend's handwriting on the front. I've not heard from him since we split a month ago. It's still on the doormat unopened. Any tips for how not to let old loves get in the way of new plans, especially when you still care? Bin the letter?

Zoopy


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## ameliacooper

Hi Ladies

I really hope you dont mind me gatecrashing your board, but I read your messages a lot and wanted to offer you encouragement.

Well .... my story I am a single girl of 36 and have always wanted to have baby.  Like most of you I've wanted to meet the right guy - and in the last couple of years I have been a bit careless in the hope that maybe I would fall pregnant - and although I never lied to any of the guys - I never fell pregnant.  But back in February my best friend had a very brief relationship with a guy and she did fall pregnant and he lives far away and is not interested.  That really gave me the push I needed - so with a nice guy that I met (and I don't want to say too much about him) I started trying to get pregnant.  I didn't tell anyone apart from my two best friends.  Luckily and I know I am truly blessed - after 5 months - the first couple were a bit hit or miss on dates but in September I was very shocked but truly delighted to discover I was pregnant.

Honestly, a lot of people were very shocked or so it seemed.  But now things seemed to have calmed down although it does feel quite a lonely journey - and I do feel like my life is on hold but I am please g-d going to be a Mum and I am truly ecstatic.

I have been very coy about baby's dad - he is in touch - but although I am truly grateful - I really want to move on with my life and I want him to as well.  I don't want him to be a part time dad - he will hopefully be on birth certificate and I hope that he will always be there for us - when I tell child about his dad.

It is such a difficult choice - do I introduce him to my family - and please my parents or do I stick to my guns and move on from this and leave him out of the equation all together.  He seems interested but I don't think he will be devastated but I truly do believe - especially now for some unknown reason - that I will now meet a guy - and he will adopt my baby - and we will be a family.

Girls - what can I say - its hasn't been the easiest journey - emotionally for me - and I know I have been incredibly lucky - but it is sooo worth it.

I wish you all sooooo much luck 
xxx


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## Felix42

Thank you Amelia!  Wishing you well with the rest of your journey.  It is great to read the experiences of other women going it alone.  It would be lovely if you join in our discussions for, as you'll have read, we've got women in all sorts of different stages on this board - some thinking about treatment, some in the midst of it already and some girls with their own little ones (like you will have soon!). 

When are you due?

Felix xx


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## Roo67

Hi Amelia and Welcome,

Thats a really difficult choice to have to make - and one only you and him know the answer to. How does he feel - does he want to be with you and the baby ? 

Wishing you lots of love and luck, as Felix said - come and join us on our other threads

Roo xx


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## Zoopy

Hi Amelia, welcome

First of all, congratulations on the pregnancy! That's great news.

Secondly, I really do feel for you, because you're facing a difficult decision; whether to bring the baby's father into your life.

I can identify with that dilemma in a way. For me, my choice is whether to co-parent with a friend, or try an anonymous donor. In a way, we are choosing the same thing potentially - do we want our baby's father to be present or not. All I can say is that I am trying to make the decision from my potential child's point of view. What would be best for them. That's very hard to know, because there are so many variables. Currently, I think the best scenario would be for my child to know its biological father, and to feel their love, from the beginning of its life, and also to have the love and care of a step-father, should I be lucky enough to find one for my child. I can't bank on the latter happening, so I feel I want to do all I can to help the former to happen.

Co-parenting with someone who is not my partner will be an enormous challenge. Our lives will be entwined for ever, hopefully in a positive way, but maybe in a negative struggling kind of way. It could be a total nightmare for me. But ultimately, it feels right to have tried all i can to bring my child and its biological father together, for both of their sakes really.

Now, I don't know whether that helps you at all. And I must also say that i can very much see the benefits of going it alone. If my friend drops out I'll be going it alone too, with an anonymous donor. I wish you well with a difficult decision. Let me know how you get on.

Zoopy x


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## ♥JJ1♥

Hi Zoopy

I guess I had a similar dilema to you, I wanted to TTC and then 2 main friends (both gay men) offering sperm, or I had the clinic option that some of my friends went down for their babies. Another friend has just been approved to adopt as a single woman.

Co-parenting and using a known donor are very different concepts. C0-parenting is 50% 50% sharing the child's life/decision/sharing parental responsibility legally etc.  I decided I wanted a known donor as I wanted my child to have contact with a father figure.

I chose my donor as the other man wanted to co-parent which is very different to donating for you- and I didn't want to be a part time mother and have the child live elsewhere for half the time, also he was not from the UK although living here and working here for the last 10 years plus but I didn't want a long distance battle. He was a very kind hearted, stunningly attractive man.  He was single but now met and married his US partner, which could also effect the future relationship. He was also a recreational drug user, but otherwise sporty and healthy.

I chose my known donor, a dear friend, also a gay man in a long term committed relationship over 15 years with his partner, he is also very attractive and kind hearted, healthy, non moker/drug using etc.  We (the 3 of us) discussed at length what we wanted re; the child, and they are not going to co-parent, but will be known to the child. At first he only wanted to be known to the child and me and not the public/family etc (we also worked together I was his manager) but now he has told his mother that we lost the baby and he was donating etc.

We started off thinking it would all be simple doing insems at their place, but then moved onto a clinic after 4 months, then discovered low sperm count ( effects 30-40% of men so good to get him tested) and then had to go down the known donor treatment route at the Bridge- so quaranting the sperm for 6 months, then IVF/ICSI- we did get pregnant on the first ICSI but I m/c in Dec 06 and then had an cycle 2 months after that where the eggs were all immature, then moved clinics and had a negative cycle and now have been diagnosed with lining problems from ERPC.
My donor did say he would totally understand if I wanted to change to annon donor when diagnosed with low count, but the reasons that I chose him still stand for me, we just need ICSI- also now it is our journey, and his partner is so supportive- I sincerely hope that I do get there in the end.

There are sample donor agreement, that you draw up about the expectation of you and the donor etc the committment you need (they need to be available to you 3 days per month when you ovulate- this means there plans are effected) sexual heath screenings, trust if home insems, hence clinic use frozen sperm and test for infections before and after the qaurantine.  I found the clinic IVF less stressful than home insems as I felt all the pressure and co-ordinating everything, wheras then the clinic did and also my donor could pop in and donate have tests done when it suited him.

You also do have to consider the future and if your and your donor's situation changes- marriage. A friend was considering a straight known donor and home insems and then he got an older girlfriend who said once 'It would be great when his baby arrived and they could do X and Y with it' this set alarm bells off and my friend heading to LWC for her son!!
Legally if you donate and conceive via a clinic even as a known donor they do not have right to the child and it is all registered via ****- you can also get the sperm signed over to you should anything happen ( I have 37 vials of it in 2 clinics stored like an insurance policy) , but with out of clinic donations (remember the recent press with the lesbian couple who took the donor to court for child support) there are no rules.  Nat Gamble the FF lawyer is very helpful on these issues she has also posted a bit on the gay and lesbian thread.

Good luck deciding
L x


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## Zoopy

Thank you for your post, L. It's great to find someone with a known donor experience too. There's lots of info to take in in your reply. Just wanted to say a quick thank you while I absorb. 

Zoopy x


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## ameliacooper

Hi Girls

It was nice to read all your replies and thanks for listening to my rant,  It is a bit like a vicious circle - the anxiety never ends.  But 2008 is going to be a positive year for all of us - and girls I really hope and pray you all get your bfps - and don't give up whatever you do.

I don't know whether you have been honest with your parents about how you feel - I wasn't.  I watched my sisters (younger) have babies but I never told anyone apart from a couple of friends and a couple of potential boyfriends (just to see if they'd run a mile) how I felt.  Then my guy came along and basically we kind of agreed to try for a baby without majorly discussing it reaIlly - It was me making arrangements and doing opks - then inviting him over and getting us pretty much sloshed so I could go through with it - g-d it sounds awful.  But never ever did I want him to be a permanant fixture.  I even went to the LFC back in January and registered to go with an anonymous donor - weirdly I haven't heard back from them and its approaching a year now.

He's a nice guy - nice looking etc and I definitely do want to be honest with my child - and he is prepared for that.  But I think for now - for me - seeing as basically the situation has calmed down with regards to baby's dad that I'll leave it as it is.  Baby's dad is my secret.  It is a tricky one - without any doubt Zoopy - I think all children need to know how they came about - and I never wanted to pretend to my child (or my parents for that fact) that this was a mistake - because it definitely wasn't - it was a carefully planned event and very much wanted!

It's not so much  now - its the future that worries me - what happens if I move on - meet a guy - want him to adopt baby?  What happens if baby's dad doesn't move on - or if he does - and breaks my/baby's heart.  what happens if we fall out - we're bound to at some point.  I've kind of made up my mind - to be honest I think - and I think I will tell baby about his dad when baby is old enough to ask - but I do feel a huge amount of guilt towards my parents who are going to help me bring this child up.  I have sprung this on them and my dad - bless him - was very shocked.

By the way - I never envisaged co-parenting.  For me I think I could only co-parent with someone I want to be with and want in my/baby's life.

I absoultely can't wait to hear all your journeys and sending you huge amounts of positive vibes.  Wish I could give tips but I used the clearblue fertility monitor and got pregnant the first time I used pre-seed!  I also had a week's holiday leading up to my bfp - but I did still drink and did loads of exercise.

Wishing you all the best and praying for all your bfps xxxx


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## suitcase of dreams

Amelia - welcome to the group, thanks for sharing your story, and congratulations on your pregnancy. How very exciting for you. Sounds like you have made a decision you are comfortable with for you and your child which is all that matters really. Lots of luck to you, I hope it all works out. And I'm sure your parents will understand completely - they will just be very happy to meet their new grandchild I'm sure  

I am going to a clinic/using an anonymous donor, and I have been very upfront about this with family and friends already. My dad died when I was a teenager so it's just my mum and my 2 sisters and we're very close (both geographically and emotionally) - I couldn't have imagined going through all this without saying anything to them. Having said that, I think fathers are a bit different to mothers and had my dad been alive it might have been quite different. I've found it much harder talking to male friends about it than the female ones - I think because most of the women immediately understand where I'm coming from and how I feel about wanting a baby, whereas the men tend to be a bit more practical/rational about it all and I suspect some of them think I'm quite mad to be going ahead on my own....not that they haven't been supportive, just that they haven't had the same emotional understanding of it that the women have. 

Personally, I just knew that if I was going to have a child there were only really 2 options for me - either in a long term relationship/marriage (but I just haven't met the right person for that and time is running out - I'm 38 next year) or on my own. I just couldn't see any of the co-parenting, or even known donor options working for me - it just didn't feel right. For a while I thought about asking an ex boyfriend to donate - he's now in a relationship with a women who has an 18yr old and wants no more children. And I know he regrets not having kids. But then I realised that he would probably want to be a part of the child's life - perhaps even a big part - and that just felt a bit odd to me. I didn't want him having any 'claim' on the child as time went by and it worried me that he could legally challenge me for access/full custody at some point if he wanted to....

But everyone is different and you have to do what feels right for you. 

Of course I'm hoping that I won't be single forever and that I will ultimately meet someone who is happy to be with me and my future child/children. But if that doesn't happen, I will just make sure that my child/children have lots of other male role models in their lives (I have plenty of male friends, plus brother in law and other male family members). 

It's a difficult journey whichever way you go about it that's for sure. But at the end of the day, I don't think it's all that much easier if you are in a couple to start with. It's still a major emotional (and financial) upheaval, and there are no guarantees that couples who have kids will stay together in the future anyway. Society has developed in such a way that we currently see having children as something a man and a woman do in a marriage/long term relationship but who is to say that that is how it should be/will always be? And there certainly doesn't seem to be any evidence to suggest that children born of single mothers (by choice - as opposed to single teenage mums who accidentally get pregnant etc) are any worse off psychologically/academically etc than those born to married parents. 

Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox now  
Good luck to all of us in 2008 - let's hope this year brings us all our much wanted children
Laura


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## ♥JJ1♥

Amelia congrautlations on your BFP co nice to read your story - I'm not clear how you got pregnant  with the man - home inseminations or doing the actualy deed?

L X


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## Damelottie

Many many congratulations Amelia!! Its so interesting to read how we all go about reaching our dream.

Ideally, I actually wanted to co-parent and did spend some time talking things through with 2 gay men. One was single and one was in a relationship. Neither of those worked out for different reasons. I have asked a couple of people to consider being my donor but they decided against.

Keep in touch with us

Love
Emma xxx


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## marmite_lover

I find it absolutely fascinating (and helpful) hearing evertone's stories and how you all decided on the route you are/have taken.  This board is a god send.  It is the one place I feel I can be really honest and people will really understand how I feel and won't judge me, even if they don't necessarily agree with me.

I am truly in a dilema at the moment and would really welcome any thoughts/input.  

I have decided one way or another, with DP or alone, that I want to start TTC within the next 6 months.  I have talked it through with my mum and sister and both are behind me 100% which is great.  I have no qualms about doing this on my own, and have never really invisaged the hubby, 2.4 kids etc so fortunately haven't had to get my head round that.  I suppose my only concern is any resentment the child itself might feel about the situation but that is another issue!

Things are going well with DP in the moment.  He is trying very hard bless him and we have had a really nice Christmas/NY.  He has taken on another part time job 5 mornings a week to clear his debts and has been so much more patient and pleasent to be around.  There are still times when he drives me up the wall and I could cheerfully throttle him though - we often see things very differently!   He hasn't moved back yet and wont be for a good few months but he is really pressing for us to try for a baby again  if I decide to make a go of things (failed vas reveresal Mar 07 so would need ICSI).  If I am a 100% honest, although I think he would like a child with me, I know a big part of this is that he knows I desperately want a baby and hopes this will persuade me to stay with him (he doesn't know of my plans to go it alone if things don't work out).  He has made it clear he is willing to use DS if we couldn't have a biological child together.

The thing is......I care about him very much and generally we get on well, have lots of friends in commen at football etc, but I am not sure in my heart if hearts that I will ever properly love him, certainly not in the way I did my ex-h (I still have a lot of guilt/regret issues about the whole thing which doesn't help), and yet part of me is still tempted to try for a baby with him.  I can't bring myself to say this outloud to anyone else except you guys and my mum.  I'm pretty sure he knows this too but this doesn't seeem to put him off at all.  I know that some of my friends would think I am absolutely mad to even consider it and that I should wait around for Mr Right and do it all 'properly'.  I suppose the whole idea seems less absurb to me because I am comfortable and happy with the idea of doing it on my own anyway so if it doesn't seem that far removed from that.  And as I don't want to wait around for Mr Right, I am going to need treatment whether I am with him or not so that isn't really an issue for me.  

Please be honest - do you think I am mad to even consider it?

Congratulations Amelia - 2008 is going to be a very exciting year for you!  It is a real dilema but therea ren't any right or wrong answers -Do you mind me asking, when you agreed to try for a baby, was there any discussion as to the level of involement he would have?  I think you have to just try and trust your instincts when the time comes (lot easier said than done I know).  

Emma - I saw that you are looking at the 3 for 2 offer with LWC.  I am considering that myself if I do go it alone - hopefully just knowing you you have 3 attempts paid for hopefuly will ease the pressure just a little.  Have you made an appointment yet?

Thank you everyone else for sharing your experiences too xx


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## suitcase of dreams

Karen - so glad to hear things are going well with DP at the moment, I know it's been a difficult time for you recently.

I don't think you're mad to consider going ahead with trying for a baby with DP, of course not. I have a feeling (although I probably wouldn't admit this to most people) that if I'd had anyone in my life over the past couple of years with whom I could have 'accidentally' got pregnant, I would have gone ahead and done it - or tried to at least. I'm sad that I have to go through such a clinical process to get a much wanted child, although I guess I am also happy in a way that the clinical process is so clear cut and I won't have any legal/custody issues etc. 

As I see it, there's no 'proper' way here anyway, and there isn't necessarily such thing as Mr Right either - at least not a Mr Right forever. I think we all just have to make the best decisions we can with the information we have available at the time, and given the way we feel at the time. The future is just so unpredictable anyway. I know so many women who thought they'd met Mr Right, married, had kids, and are now divorced and bringing up the kids on their own, or remarrying and having more kids with their new partner (I often find it very sad that I am still single/childless when many of my friends are moving onto their 2nd marriage/set of kids, but that's another story  ). And I look at my own mum - if she'd known when she married my dad and had the three of us that he would die at a relatively young age of 46 and leave her with 3 children under 12 to bring up alone, would she still have gone ahead? Of course she would....

I don't know if I'm making any sense here, but I guess my point is that you just have to make the best decision you can right now and let the future take care of itself. And much like you yourself said to Amelia - trust your own instincts!

I guess you and DP need to have talked about it enough that you are both comfortable with all aspects of the decision and particularly what you might do if you had a child but things didn't work out between the two of you - especially if you end up using donor sperm....then it would be even more important to have talked about the level of involvement your DP would have. 

Hope this has helped somewhat, although I think I have just rambled really
Good luck whatever you decide...

Laura
x


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## marmite_lover

Thank you so much Laura. I feel like I constantly on here needing advice and support and you (like lots of the other ladies on here) always take the time to reply and manage to make me feel so much better.  I hope in the future I'll be able to be here for you too if you should ever need it.  
I know exactly what you mean about not admiting things to most people - it is such a relief just to be able to talk to people on here who understand and won't judge.  To be honest, having talked to many of my friends, I don't think there are many who haven't considered an 'accident' at some point in the past.  I think if A was able to have kids (and assuming I am ok too) I would undoubtedly already be pregnant, but the fact that we/I have to make a conscious decision makes it that much harder.  

I also agree about there being no such thing as a Mr Right forever.  I loved my ex-husband so so much, I would NEVER have believed that it could have ended, never mind the fact I would be the one to do it.  As you say, none of us know what is going to happen in the future and I know that any regrets I had in the future would be dwarfed by the regret I will have if I miss the opportunity to at least try to be a mum.

Thanks once again.  Here's wishing you all the luck in the world for your upcoming treatment.  I will be keeping everything crossed for you xxx

I'm probably biased but there the ladies on here (and FF in general) are such a great bunch, any baby born to them will have a head start in my opinion regardless of perhaps a less traditional set up


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## Roo67

Hi Karen,
Glad you had a good christmas and newyear with DP

I agree with Laura - I wouldn't feel bad about ttc with DP, I'm sure I would if I was in that position, if you are determined to go ahead on your own anyway then if things don't work out then you are prepared to be a single mum. IYKWIM

I'm the same as you Laura, my sister is onto her second marriage - child with both and I'm still sat here on my own childless, other friends have found their Mr Right's and have been married for nearly 20yrs, with 3 children each. In fact they all said I would be married and have children before them - 22 yrs later ..............?



> I'm probably biased but there the ladies on here (and FF in general) are such a great bunch, any baby born to them will have a head start in my opinion regardless of perhaps a less traditional set up


Ah bless ya what a lovely thing to say.

Roo xx


----------



## Damelottie

Hi Karen

Happy New year hun - lovely to hear from you    .

Lets face it - getting 'accidentally' pregnant is something that MILLIONS of women have been doing for THOUSANDS of years - either to get their man or to get their baby. It just isn't that many people admit to it.I reckon the only thing unique about us on here is that we're trying hard NOT to do that     . Does that make sense??

Just thinking our loud Karen - do you think he would make a good father? Because I suppose there is the possiblity of having a child with him and then, if your relationship doesn't work out, he would still be a good father.. Blimey - I'm making no sense.

I hope I won't upset anybody but I'll be honest. I think you should go it alone if you're comfortable with that. Having a child with him if you really don't love him isn't fair on you. You deserve to find love. But obviously thats just my opinion

Its all so difficult.

Karen - are you def coming to the meet hun?? Hope so

Emma xxxxx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Very good point Em, we definitely all deserve to find love....and hopefully sooner rather than later  

Such a hard decision Karen - I know how much you agonised about getting back together with him and if you decide to go ahead with ttc on your own, then I guess that's really the end of the road for your relationship. So the question becomes less about having a baby (since you know you definitely want that) and back to being about the relationship - do you really want to be with him or not? Or, to be very blunt, are you only staying with him because you think it would be easier to have a child that way (and because you perhaps still feel a bit guilty about how devastated he was when the relationship ended and how hard he has tried to change?)
Excuse my bluntness, but reading between the lines, it does seem that the question isn't really about trying for a baby at all, it's about whether you want to be with this man or not....

It really is so very difficult and there are no easy answers. 

In some ways I'm sort of glad I'm 100% single and not even dating as it means I can just focus on me and getting pregnant. But I don't want to be on my own forever, so at some point I'll have to face up to these things too...am just hoping there's someone out there for me who won't mind taking on a child/children conceived using donor sperm....hmm, I wonder....

Hope to see you on the 26th Karen, and in the meantime, do take care and take some time to think things through - we're always here if you need a listening ear/shoulder to cry on - even if they are 'virtual' ones at the moment....

Laura
x


----------



## kylecat

Hey karen - lovely to hear from you again and glad that things are going well with your DP. I havent really got much more to add because I think that the other girls have given some great advice! Just to clarify though, would you be trying for a baby in the conventional way or would you need fertility treatment - I think you mentioned once that your Dp had had a vasectomy? That would obviously make the issue a little bit more difficult. Thankyou for your kind comments re the girls on FF - it was really sweet of you and bought a tear to my eye!! 

Love and good luck katiexx


----------



## ameliacooper

hi Girls

Thanks for making me feel so welcome.  

Listening to you girls it is nice to know that there are soo many girls out there like me - and I know a lot of my friends feel the same - I just think that some are scared to admit it!

Just to answer a couple of questions - JJ1 - no we didn't do the deed - it was an evening of about 1 to 2 hours of chat - me getting completely slaughtered and well you know the rest!  And Karen it too me  5 attempts - but as I say I only used a fertility monitor for the last 2.  We did discuss - in the beginning what sort of involvement he would have and I made it clear - and he was completely cool about it that I did want baby to have the chance to get to know Dad - he would be on birth certificate (although obviously we're not there yet) and that we would work together and he promised me I vaguely remember that he would be there for us - should we need him.

But I have to say things do change - not to do with him - he is very much in touch - but I feel now - that seeing as I have told everyone i asked an ex boyfriend (which isn't true) to give me a baby and I have totally kept him out of the equation that I feel now that I may as well not over complicate things and go it totally alone.  I wonder if I will have more chance of finding love that way.

Karen - I sooo understand where you are coming from - and it depends what you want more as in do you want the baby more or do you want a relationship with this guy.  Just because you have a baby with him doesn't mean you have to be together or even stay together - I tried to get pregnant with a few guys last year that I didn't want to be with.  It is completely up to you - but if he will make a 'suitable dad' and help with treatment and other costs then why not?  But if you feel he is going to hold you back in the future then I guess it is worth thinking about moving on from him.

I think Emma - you are totally right - we all deserve to find love - and I fully plan to.

I have decided that whilst my dream is to have a family - and ideally coming from a big family I never only wanted to have one child - and I feel sooo blessed to have been this lucky - but I'm not going to do this again.  Next time I want to be in a proper stable relationship or I will possible involve my family and may consider adopting when I'm around 42ish if things haven't worked out for me.

Axx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Wow you lot have been busy.

Karen great to hear from you, really pleased to hear you and DP had a great christmas and new year, wishing you all the very best for 2008 hun.  You're having a bit of a dilema, don't know what I would be thinking in your shoes, have been wondering and so much is down to 'what ifs', it makes it so hard.  From reading I think you are trying to decide whether to start your treatment alone, or with DP.  Hope i've got that right.  I guess a lot of it comes down to if you see you as having a future together, something only you can work out, but I have had the following thoughts.  If you were to go down this route together and have your dear baby, if it turned out that he is not the person you are meant to spend your life with then he will still and probably always will be a massive part of your life and father of your child.  I just wonder how this would work out when you do meet your Mr Right ....  and I am sure you will one day find someone that you KNOW you want to spend the rest of your life with. On the other hand if you decide to to down the treatment route alone, your child will not already have a father and when 'the one' does turn up you will have only you and your childs feelings to deal with, and of course mr god damn sexy wonderful    Going it alone would probably make things a loss less complicated when you do find love that lasts forever hun, I suppose i'm also thinking along the lines of a future partner may see the child as his, more than he would if child was also DPs.  I'm rambling but hope you know where I am coming from.

I hope this hasn't come accross as negative, if you decide DP is the one for you I will be absolutely thrilled for you.  Whatever you decide you already know we're all here for you 100% of the way.

Take care, thinking of you

Jovi xxx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Karen

I guess the other thing to think about is your child - is it better to have a definite father or a possibility somewhere in the future?  It's something that plagues most of us, I'm sure, to do the best thing - but what is that?  I can only answer that for myself.

It does sound as though you're wondering whether you want to be with him rather than wondering about the tx.  Another thought is that if you do have a child and don't stay together, you'd be in no different situation than most other separated couples with children.

I guess what it boils down to is what feels right for you and, unfortunately, nobody but you can tell you that.

I hope you sort out what you want to do - remember, whatever decision you make is the right one .

love
Suzie
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Karen- I can understand your dilema, but can't really help you only you can decide what feels right for you and it will be the right decision for you.  I am a bit doubtful and less trusting of men so would prefer to be in charge and in control.L x


----------



## Felix42

Karen, I really feel for you and your dilemma.  There's no right answer, is there?  Children come into the world in such a variety of ways and you can't anticipate what might happen to a relationship further down the line.  You've just got to go with your heart really and maybe try not to think about it too much.  Maybe give yourself a bit of a deadline and relax and try and be easier on yourself.  You've been through a lot lately!    Good luck whatever you decide to do.  You know we'll all support you!

Hope everyone else is ok and the year is getting off to a good start!

I've got my consultation for IVF tomorrow morning and am really nervous.  It feels all rather scary and momentous - I guess it's because it feels like my one remaining chance (after my two unsuccessful IUIs).  Please wish me luck!!  ...& for tomorrow evening's date.  Boy, what a day!

Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Oh god luck tomorrow Felix. I must phone tomorrow about my appt at LWC xx


----------



## Roo67

Good luck for you appointment Felix    , hope its all good news.


----------



## Zoopy

Hi everyone. Yes, very best of luck Felix. And Karen, i hope you're feeling more at ease. 

Felix, if you are happy to share, would you mind letting me know what happens at the IVF appt? I'm wondering what kinds of considerations there are, what they might say generally. 

To everyone, I feel like I have an urgent need to choose a clinic to go with. I'd like to do that in the next few days, and make an appt. I've been to LWC once for a round of tests, and the Lister once. I felt more comfortable at the Lister, I must admit. The consultant was great. But I'm very worried about the cost there. I already know that I'm likely to be a low responder and may need several rounds of treatment, and LWC has the 3for 2 package of IVF. The Lister costs feel quite prohibitive - it would be loan time.

Can anyone share their experiences of deciding on a clinic please? I guess my considerations are availability of donor sperm (if i go that route), quality of care, cost and success rates. SHould I be thinking about anything else?

For my age range, I know the LWC quotes 47% success for the three IVF attempts in total (25% for just one attempt), the Lister 33% for just one attempt. Wierdly, the Lister quotes a whopping 59% success for one attempt with donor sperm. That can't be right can it?


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Morning everyone!

No snow here - quite disappointed actually, I rather like a bit of snow 

Good luck with the appointment Felix - let us know how you get on

Zoopy - I only actually went to one clinic (LWC) and I made my decision on 2 variables really: the first being availability of sperm, the second location. I live outside London (Hampshire) and wanted one easy to get to, so ruled out some of the less central London ones on that basis. I can't remember where the Lister is or whether I ruled it out because of location or sperm availability. My short list was down to just LWC and Bridge and there just happened to be an Open Day at LWC, after which they offered half price first consultation and that was that really. 
I do find it very interesting hearing other people talk about their clinics and the different ways of doing the treatment/different advice they get. I think I will have a few goes of IUI at LWC, see how I get on, and then maybe review my clinic along with my treatment plan in about 3-6 months if I'm not pregnant.

To be totally honest, I didn't really look at success rates beyond a first quick look which suggested the % were all kind of similar enough for me not to worry about it. From reading this site I know some clinics have better success rates with the over 40s and/or women with specific fertility problems, but since I'm still under 40 and no known fertility problems, I felt comfortable with LWC - at least for now. 

I'm guessing here but I imagine the reason success rates are much higher with donor sperm is that the donor sperm is carefully chosen/vetted to be of the highest quality....so maybe that's why the rates are so much better with the donor sperm?

Good luck with your decision!
Laura
x


----------



## marmite_lover

Morning all

Kylekat - in answer to your question, DP had a failed VR so we would need ICSI. We did have one try in March last year but it was cancelled after EC as I got OHSS. We have 11 frosties though so would probably try a couple of FETs first if we did go ahead with tx. And I genuinely meant what I said before about you lot. You are all so kind, warm, compassionate and non-judgmental any child would be lucky to have you as their mummies 

Thank you so much for all your fantastic advice, you have all made such valid points and have pretty much summed up the arguments that I go through on an hourly basis in my head. I literally find myself writing mental for and against lists :

On the plus side it would mean that the child would know their father, it just seems easier somehow in the sense of what to tell other people - I am more than happy to go it alone in a practical sense but (and I know it is ridiculous) but one of my worst fears is what I would tell other people and what they would make of it. Also I know this is what he wants and finally if things didn't work out I wouldn't be in any worse position than if I had gone it alone

But on the other hand it does rule out meeting someone else in the near future, makes it more complicated if I was to meet someone else one day and I worry about the impact on the child if we were to split



lauris said:


> Or, to be very blunt, are you only staying with him because you think it would be easier to have a child that way (and because you perhaps still feel a bit guilty about how devastated he was when the relationship ended and how hard he has tried to change?)
> Excuse my bluntness, but reading between the lines, it does seem that the question isn't really about trying for a baby at all, it's about whether you want to be with this man or not....


You have pretty much hit the nail on the head Laura - in answer to the questions about whether I want to be with him - I do care about him very much, day to day we are quite happy and it makes me sad to think of not being with him but &#8230;&#8230; if I am completely honest he is not the love of my life and I'm not sure I see it lasting forever. I suppose if I am really honest I see it more as a practical arrangement than anything else and I suppose that is the crux of my dilemma - I'm not sure that is morally right? I know I must sound dreadful as if I am just using him, but I have been completely honest with him about how I feel and he (for various reasons I think) he is still adamant that this is what he wants and if things don't work out we would be able to deal with it. Sometimes I wish I could be a bit more live for the moment an worry about the consequences later but that really isn't me!

Anyway I think I have bored you all enough for now so I will go away to ponder it over. Thank you all for your help and advice, it is really really appreciated, especially as I know some of you are going through difficult times of your own xxx

Felix - wishing you lots of luck for your appointment - can't wait to hear how you get on.

Zoopy - it does sound high, although I suppose if poeple are using DS is either because of MF or because a person is single which in theory means that there are no (known) problems with the females and therefore has a better success rate?

Lauris - I love the snow too!


----------



## Felix42

Hello there, just a quickie from me. Appointment went well this am (I guess). Have been given less than 5% success rate for IVF because of my poor response to stimulation under IUI. Going to have much higher rates of drugs - 350 units daily so you never know. Also got put on waiting list (ironically currently c 9 months) for egg donation at LWC. Feel ok about that as if I don't have success with IVF with my own eggs at least I will have really, really tried!

Good news is (for you youngsters!), LWC's cut off for 3 IVF package is now under 40. This is what the IVF literature they gave me today says. 

Anyway feeling fairly positive still (well you've got to hope haven't you?!). Hope you are all well. 

Felix xx


----------



## marmite_lover

Hi Felix - I'm glad the appointment went well and thanks for letting us know how you got on.  It is nice to know you have a back up plan but here's hoping you won't need it   .  I wouldn't worry to much about the success rate they've quoted - there are so many other variables every cycle -from the hundreds of stories on here how irrelevant the statistics normally are.

I thought the waiting list for egg donation was longer than that in the UK, so that is good news.  Glad to hear they have extended their 3 IVF package too.

Keep up the positivity - we'll get there in the end


----------



## Felix42

Thanks so much Karen for the positivity. Like you say people have beaten the odds before and hey why not me too?!   Knowing I have a plan B does help though and I'm feeling pretty positive about egg donation if it comes to that. 
Yes, it really is good news that the 3 IVF package is open to those under 40. Go girls!

Felix xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Absolutely Felix - and they say positive mental attitude is half the battle, so at least you've got that part sorted. Wishing you lots of luck   

waiting list for donor eggs also much shorter than I had thought too - which is great should you need the plan B (which you won't  )

and thanks for letting us know re the 3 IVF package at LWC - great news for those of us (and there are a few I think) around the 38-39yrs mark

Laura
x


----------



## Zoopy

Thank you for the update Felix. I love your approach, it's an inspiration. I've only been at this a matter of months and already i'm thinking blow the stats! Miracles do happen. Childbirth is a bloody miracle anyway! And, yes, there's absolutely no reason why that miracle can't happen for you as much as anyone else.

Best wishes

Zoopy


----------



## Zoopy

Sorry everyone - a dumb question. Could anyone tell me how to send a private message to someone here please? I can't work it out. :-(


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Hi Zoopy

Click on the little green scroll at the bottom underneath pictures  xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Felix  - Glad that the appt went well, I think it is always important to have a plan B- I always try to have one up my sleeve.  Is the waiting list for egg donation only 9 months at LWC ? as that is very quick for the UK, hence most people head to Spain or Eastern Europe and of course the cost is less there.  

If I can sort my lining out I will ty once more with my own eggs  - Plan A ( I have always been a poor responder- and was on 600 IU of Gonal F on 2nd IVF and produced 5 immature eggs and 600IU of Puregon and Menoral on the 3rd IVF and still only produced 4 eggs) the Hammersmith gave me a less than 10 % chance and ARGC 20% chance. Plan B (lining permitting!!) would be donor eggs in Barcelona with my donors sperm.

I don't pay much to the stats for the ages etc as most of the **** stats are 2 years out of date now and can be tweaked around- like my accupuncturist said someone could have had 3 cycles in a suburban clinic and then  go to one of London's clinic and get pregnant on the first cycle - due to different protocols, as I asked him what cycle most women get pregnant on, and he said it depends.

Are there qualifying criteria for taking you on the 3 for 2 package- if you have had cycles elsewhere do they exclude you?

L x


----------



## Zoopy

Thank you Jovigirl . 

JJ1, your mail box is full, and it won't let me PM you . 

Zoopy


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Zoopy I've deleted some pm's
L x


----------



## Zoopy

Thank you L. Sorry to say i've just tried it again and it's come up with the same message.


----------



## Damelottie

Oh gosh - isn't there always something  

It seems that all donors in Czec still had full anonymity which is exactly what I didn't want! I wanted any child I have to have the option of finding out about its roots. Its just my opinion but its always felt important to me. If I have to look into taking my own sperm - even if thats possible - then I imagine it will no longer be so cost effective.

I'm so impressed with them already tho. I'm getting immediate and very friendly informative 'e' mails back whereas the LWC - I've sent them 2 'e' mails now and not heard a darned thing from them. Its not goo enough really is it - when you think how much money they get??

Gosh sorry - I'm a right ranty old bag today xxx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Glad you've heard back Em, I still haven't I might try the address on the other thread.  I didn't realise about donor anonymity either so will have to think on that one.  I've got no one who I can ask to donate so will have to think on


----------



## suitcase of dreams

That's what makes me hesitate about Reprofit - or indeed most overseas clinics - I also really want my child to have the option to know about their donor when they turn 18. Although I suppose there's no guarantee even if you stay in the UK. So much can happen in 18 years - what if the donor emigrates, dies, can't be traced etc....guess that's just something we have to live with when we make these choices on behalf of our as yet unborn children....

I didn't get much luck with emails from LWC, and especially not over the weekend. But they've always been very good over the phone and have called me straight back if I haven't been able to get through to the right person. I'd give them a call on Monday and see you how get on

Good luck!
Laura
x


----------



## Felix42

I had a similar conversation with my mum about anonymity of donors and am very keen to have id release sperm (and maybe eggs if necessary) so overseas may be out for that reason.  It is a very difficult decision isn't it?  I completely support anyone who does go with anonymous donors but it's just not for me.

Regarding the LWC and emails, I agree they're not always great but in person, I find them absolutely wonderfully supportive, friendly, professional and warm.  Just my tuppence worth.

Hope everyone has had a good evening.  I've been knitting of all things! That and watching the Hand that Rocks the Cradle on dvd.  Scary stuff! Hmm, what happened to my resolution to get early nights.

Felix xx


----------



## some1

Emma

Have you considered Leicester Royal Infirmary?  I don't think it is too far from you (although my geography knowledge isn't brilliant) - it is where Sam (going it alone) went and they had good donor availability and were pretty cheap back then (and Sam had success first time with them).  Just an idea if you are not settled on a clinic yet.

Some1

xx


----------



## Damelottie

Thanks everybody - you're amazingly helpful.

Some1 - LRI isn't far from me at all so thats a thought!

Felix - it seems that I can courier ID release sperm over so I shall be looking into that. I've had a few comments now saying that the lwc are great in person and on the phone - just no 'e' mails! So, I'll let them off  . Although they should seriously consider taking it off their contact page if they don't use it  

Hugs to you all - just had another e' mail through from reprofit so going to nip off and read it.
I'm back at work tomorrow and still not feeling 100% well. Got to do it though. Am just in the process of dismantling the xmas tree. Quite relieved to be honest - no more having to pretend to be festive and happy this year  .

xxxxx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Emma I am consfused with the IVF price list    Excluding drugs what do we need to add on to the IVF cycle cost .... i'm not sure about ICSI, assisted hatching, extended cultivation etc are they extras we would need to add on?  Or would it just be the IVF cycle plus donor sperm plus drugs?    I'm guessing you got the same price list as I did.  He said there was no wait, not sure if this was for IUI or IVF though.  

Oh what to do, the more I look into it the more I just want to get started, I am getting impatient now


----------



## marmite_lover

Gosh so much going at the moment - it is all very exciting.

Jovi - I'm like you and just dying to get going with everything now, one way or another!  ICSI is an additional procedure when there is male factor issues so wouldn't apply in your case.  Likewise I wouldn't have thought you would need assisted hatching etc, unless they had idenified any particular problems which is doubtful at this stage.  So that would mean total costs of IVF, DS, drugs plus of course the flights/accomodation.  I am by no means an expert in IVF but I have been through one ICSI tx so just shout if you have any questions x

I have to admit that like most of you on here, my only hesitation about going abroad is that I would liken my child to have the chance to know a bit about their biological father if they wanted, though as Laura points there are no guarantees.  Like most of you, I think it will be a choice between LWC and their 3 cycle package and Reprofit for me if I decide to go it alone.


----------



## Damelottie

Karen - I'm going to look into courier for sperm to be taken over from here so it isn't anonymous. I'd feel happier with that. If donor turns about to have moved, died, or just be a T**t then at least that won't have been my doing. I just to be sure I have done as much as I can for the child to have potential links if it needs/wants to.

Jovigirl - I would imagine the price you have been quoted is for DIUI without using drugs.


----------



## marmite_lover

That is a good idea Emma, I didn't really realise that was an option


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Emma remember Sarahz on here who had treatment in Kiev and she tried to import sperm to Kiev but the Russian customs stopped it going through I believe- maybe PM her and ask.

ICSI is an additional cost- LWC did it to my friend without asking her as they said the donor sperm wasn't that great on EC day, and wanted to charge her full price for it  but then in the end met her half way and she has her son so is not complaining. Some clinics do ICSI as routine as it increases the chance of fertilization and if there is anything with the sperm sample like a lower count etc then it bypasses that- we always have ICSI as my donor has a lower count, but we always get over 60% fertilzation rate.
L x


----------



## Roo67

When I was discussing options with my cons on Friday, he said that they do ICSI more often now, esp for frozen sperm.

When getting donors they would only accept excellent sperm, but since the shortage they have started using poorer sperm and doing ICSI with no change in results.

I'm not sure how I feel about anonynimity - not really thought too much about the long term as yet and child being able to contact donor when 18, as didn't need to with IUI in UK, will be something I will need to seriously consider if I end up going for IVF Uk versus abroad.

Its really exciting hearing about eveyones plans - a lot is happening at the mo and hope that all our dreams come true this year.

Felix- what have you been knitting? My mum asked me the other day if I had any spare wool as she wanted to knit some beanies for children in peru(she was there last year), when I looked in my cupboard I found a half finished jumper for me, a couple of half finished baby jumpers and some dolls clothes. 

Emma - Hope you feel better for work tomorrow. you seem to be gathering quite a bit on info over the last few days, glad you are making plans again - might pick your brains if this last IUI doesn't work out.

Jovi - hows your research going ?

Love to you all

Roo xx


----------



## marmite_lover

Sorry Jovi, just shows what I know!


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Karen you know more than me  

Roo I have some information, have prices for IUI and IVF but still waiting to hear back from UK clinics I have contacted.  My GP appointment is tomorrow so fingers crossed she will refer me to local clinic, I shall let you know.  Then just need to decide which route to take, get to grips with my cycle and get my body ready, going to look at vitamins etc, I know I need to take more folic acid than normal so will ask this tomorrow, at least then I will feel like I am doing something. Hope you're feeling ok hun xx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi girls

Reprofit do ICSI as standard with their IVF, I know, with fresh and frozen sperm.  I wonder if it's because it more or less guarantees fertilisation?  Karen, it did used to be mainly for MF issues along with IUI.

Jovigirl, its likely you would only need basic IVF, plus drugs, plus DS.

By the way, Sasha on the Reprofit thread is exporting sperm from England to Czech Republic.  If you contact her, she may be able to advise you about how she's doing it.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Damelottie

Right then - the test results they would like from reprofit are FSH, LH, TSH and PRL. Is it likely my GP will know what they are? They haven't asked for HIV, Hep B and C. I wonder if they made a mistake there.

The very nice man thought I would have a very good chance of success from what I've told him so far!  . Girls, I am mathematically challenged. Please help!! I think that the total cost including drugs, scans etc is approx 2300 euros. Whats that in pounds then? About £1500?

Ooh yes - and he said I can have sperm sent there from here.


----------



## suitcase of dreams

About £1700 as of today (www.xe.com) 

That's such a good price, no wonder people go overseas

Do keep us posted on the sperm situation Em - if you can ship from here to there then I would seriously consider Reprofit as an alternative to LWC if (or more likely when...) I move on to IVF later in the year...

I wonder if they will ask for the HIV, Hep B and C etc later - since those are not directed related to your fertility, whereas I think the others are. Although maybe not TSH - that's thyroid I believe. PRL is probably Prolactin? FSH/LH your doctor should know...

Laura
x


----------



## Damelottie

Of course. Yes TSH is thyroid as I have that done every year! I wonder if thats what they mean.

I've found out this eveing that is IS possible to move the sperm from here to there. My next plan tomorrow is to try and gets ome costs for that.

Is that cheaper then than the lwc 3 for 2 package? I can't remember if that package included the drugs. Got a feeling it didn't. 

I think I've got that right - at about 2300 euros. I'll let you know if I've missed anything.


----------



## suzie.b

Emma

All the tests I needed, I had done at my GPs as basic fertility testing.

Hope you manage to get your GP to do them for you - otherwise, probably very cheap at Reprofit (even if you don't go for IVF with them ).

love
Suzie
xxx


----------



## kylecat

Emma  - fab news about reprofit! Very reasonable and great that they think your chances are so good! Lots of luck katiexxxx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Emma, great news everything is moving forward, how very exciting.  Good luck with the sperm re-location!


----------



## Felix42

Hello all, sounds like you've really been doing a lot of research on the options abroad! I must admit I'm starting to dither a bit myself having just worked out £5,500 cost for one IVF cycle here including embryo freezing and the 350 iu puregon I've been suggested to take.  I could get two tries in Czech for that couldn't I?!

Anyone know how long you'd need to be over there?

Hope everyone is having a good evening.  I'm in a real stop now and will watch a bit of SATC to try and get all this out of my head for a while!

Felix xx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Felix have just pm'd you.

I'm having a sex and the city night too, nice hot bath first with some chill out lush smellies x


----------



## Felix42

Much appreciated Jovi!

I must remember to have more baths while I can.  For some reason they are banned during the 2WW...

Felix xx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Felix if I'm still not sure whether to go IUI or IVF route but that price will rule me out completely for treatment here. 

Reprofit were really good at replying to emails so if you decide to contact them you should get your answers pretty quick xx


----------



## Felix42

Thanks again Jovi.  There really is so much to think about isn't there?

I'm going to email Reprofit too to ask about likely success rates and the tests needed.

Have a great night, Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Right then.....

I have decided to see my GP to get my initial tests done that reprofit have asked for. I am going to lie and say I'm in a relationship so hopefully that'll work. Very annoyed at having to but what can you do?

But I am def going to take this one very small step at a time. I've realised that if I don't, I just start to panic. So I'm not thinking of the bigger picture or the end result and may even not talk about it all very much. It sounds odd I know but I need to take the pressure right off in order to be able to go forward.

How are you all on this bit??

Love

Emma xxx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Taking small steps makes perfect sense Em. All the best self help books tell you to take the big goal, break it down into bite size chunks and focus on completing each chunk before moving to the next. I think subconsciously I have been doing that already - first step gp and tests, then consultant, then hycosy,scans, injection, iui - but at each step the focus was just to get through that bit. Even now the iui is done I am not really thinking baby - just how to get through two weeks wait...and I have noticed that the further through the process I get, the less I talk about it. At the beginning I talked about it freely to most friends and family. Now I wait for them to ask and keep the replies quite brief. Probably trying to protect myself if its a no in two weeks time I guess. Anyway well done for deciding to get the tests done. Just keep taking those little steps and before you know it you will have achieved the end goal. Good luck with your Gp - and dont feel bad about saying you are in a relationship - they should not be allowed to discriminate against us single girls anyway. Laura x


----------



## Damelottie

Thanks Laura

I feel very differently to how I did with my first IUI. I almost felt as though I went through that without thinking about it at all! In reality, I wasn't in that good a mind place to be doing it.

I've realised that with the IVF - cost, medical procedures, going abroad etc, I just HAD to keep the pressure off it all. I don't know why but this feels bigger - which of course it isn't really. Not in terms of the end result if that makes any sense at all  . But I realised that by finding out as much info as I could - in terms of flights, hotels, etc etc - I was getting waaaaaaay ahead of myself, and it suddenky all felt overwelming!

Love
Emma xxx


----------



## suzie.b

Emma  what a lot of pressure you've been putting on yourself.

IVF isn't much different - it just feels like it is when you haven't done it - more stuff to learn about I suppose and only one other procedure - egg collection .  It does feel very unnatural but the one thing it has going for it is that at least I knew that I had a fertilised embryo transferred.

You sound very sensible breaking it down into chunks - it is very daunting but hopefully the end result for all of us will be well worth it.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Roo67

I've taken the first step and contacted Stephan at Reprofit, need to get more bloods done, will wait for next cycle just to make sure all IUI drugs are out of my system.

Taking small steps is the way to go Em - thats what i am trying to do to, but have had a little peek at flights and hotels but can't do anything until got date etc.
I always thought tha IVF was a much bigger deal but having gone through 8 IUI's this year it doesn't feel much different now and just the next step to succeed in my goal.

Roo xx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Emma small steps sounds like an excellant idea, will definately make the whole process much easier to get your head around, i'm all for as little pressure as possible!  Good luck with the bloods, don't blame you saying you have a partner, its hard enough anyway without judgemental GP's to deal with.

Roo well done for your first step!  You should find you hear back pretty quick ... don't know when you are thinking of starting but I don't think there is a waiting list   (unless you are using DE).  Let us know how you get on.

xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Roo - congrats on contacting Reprofit - at least you will have some ideas of dates to work towards etc. 

If you don't mind me asking, why are you going there rather than continuing to have your tx in the UK? Is it the cost? Am just curious as if my IUIs do not work within 3-6 months I shall also be moving to IVF and am wondering whether best to stick with LWC or already start to explore overseas options...never hurts to be prepared (with my sister and 3 friends pregnant/expecting between May and August this year I'm very keen to make this happen sooner rather than later  )

Laura
x


----------



## Roo67

I filled in the first-virtual-visit form and sent that off on fri night, got a reply back on sat am that said just the blank form was attached so sent it off again when i got back yesterday afternoon and got a reply back within a couple of hours. I'd heard he was quick but didn't expect a reply back straightaway !!

He's sent me a donor questionairre - is this my characteristics that I fill so he can match me or is it what I want a donor to look like ?
I need to have some bloods taken and will have to wait till next cycle - just hope that is not when I am away in the states but think it might well be so will probably be into march. Will probably do me good to have acouple of months drug free anyway.

Yes it is the cost Laura - it would cost me £5000 for 1 go here as opposed to around 1/2 that at reprofit. i haven't fully decided yet but just looking at options. 

Roo xx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

It's a tough one to decide isn't it Roo, financially it makes so much sense and I don't have a bottomless purse!  The only thing i've not thought through and got my head round is donor anoniminty ... thats the tricky bit but something to mull over in the future, not my time just yet!

Good luck!


----------



## Damelottie

Gosh Roo - I don't think I'd fully taken on board that you'd done 8 iui's in one year. Have a  . Thats one heck of a year.

I was also really impressed with how quickly I heard back from Reprofit, No doubt - if I do go head - I shall go there. So much fab info on here as well with regards to hotels, travel etc. Very reassuring. 

I didn't fill out the donor form yet so not sure what they're asking. I did that 'virtual' one. Odd name for it -   

Well done for making some progress

xxxx


----------



## Felix42

Hello everyone

Good for you taking the first steps Emma and Roo.  I do know what you mean about IVF seeming such a big deal but thanks for the reassurance that it's not Suzie!

I'm going to be starting next week AF permitting.  After getting 3 quotes for the drugs package LWC offered, I've managed to get one £70 less at Ali's Chemist in Shadwell so that's a relief.  I noticed they're recommended by you JJ1 on the Cheaper Drugs thread!  Thanks JJ1.

It's definitely feeling all very momentous indeed now though! I think I will adopt your approach Emma and try to take it more step by step. Afterall you've only got to concentrate on the next step / day / injection / appointment or phone call haven't you?  Each step is one closer than the last!

Just in case (keeping positive!)   if things don't work out this cycle and I don't get any frosties, then I'm coming with you all to Reprofit.  It really does sound brilliant.

Felix xx


----------



## kylecat

Good luck felix with the IVF - a very exciting journey for you  

Love and best wishes Katiexx


----------



## Roo67

Felix, your IVF seems to have come round so quickly - how exciting. 

Roo xx


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## Felix42

Yes, it certainly does feel like it's rushed around!  Could be anytime from Tuesday til Friday of next week.

Feeling very excited and great that everyone is making plans and moving forward isn't it?    to everyone,

F xx


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## Damelottie

OOOOH - well done Felix

I've got a GP appt on Friday to see about my bloods. If not I've got a quote from the local private hospital so I'll go there if not. I'll be very very cross with my GP if they don't help out though.

xxxx


----------



## Damelottie

Roo - I had my sperm donor recipient form. I'm pretty sure its our characteristics etc we fill in 
xxxx


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## Felix42

Emma, good luck with getting bloods done by your GP. My GP agreed to do mine but took so much time I needed to do it thru the clinic too which was a waste. You should be able to have lots of time though and why on earth wouldn't they?!

Felix xx


----------



## suzie.b

Emma, good luck with your GP visit tomorrow  .  Do you feel any less wobbly than you did the other day?   

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Damelottie

Hello eveybody.

How are you Felix? Are you feeling read to go again after your disappointment?

So, I'm waiting for AF so I can get my bloods done. In the meantime I thinl I've pretty much decided now (as I do and then change it again), that I shall be going to LWC instead of reprofit. I just can't accept the idea of using anonymous sperm. It won't sit comfortably with me at all. I've looked into buying sperm and shipping it over but that so expensive (and stressful) that it defeats the object of going for the cheaper treatment abroad. I think I had been fooling myself that using anonymous sperm doesn't matter - but it does matter to me - enormously. I woke up in the night thinking "how could I say I'd always do the best I could for my child and then fail that at the very first hurdle". Just my personal opinion obviously - not intended to offend anybody at all. I just know that my background and identify and enromous for me and I know that I would probably never cope with not knowing my own genetic background. So as I feel so strong about it - I really have no choice. I realise there is no guarantees of any donor being able to be reached when the child is 18 but at least I will have done everything I can about that.

Sorry for the long post - it helps so much to get it all down   

So I'll make my consultation appt asap for when my results are through and then BEG my pct to pay my meds! Well, you never know.

How are all the other IVF plans going?

Emma xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi Emma,
That must have taken some soul searching for you to do.  Good luck with your journey.
Felix - your IVF has come round so quickly, I too am now considering the IVF route over the IUI. My consultant did strongly recommend I take that route.... Now to import my little danish wigglies.
All the best everyone
Take care
Rachel x


----------



## suzie.b

Emma

Congratulations on making your decision - we have to feel comfortable with what we've done, and you sound as though you are now.

 

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## kylecat

Emma - glad to hear you have decided which clinic to have your treatment at. I have heard a lot of good things about the LWC. Wishing you lots and lots of luck!  

Felix - I hope you are well and feeling positive about your next cycle  

Take care girls katiexx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Em  - you sound very positive about your decision - that's great news. I've probably missed it somewhere, but have you had IUI already and that's why you are going straight to IVF now? Or do you just think it makes more sense to go straight for it as the chances are so much higher?
I'm totally with you on the donor anonymity question. That's why I wouldn't be able to go abroad for tx. I know it's a personal decision that we all have to make for ourselves, but like you my family history is important to me and I would like to feel that I have done everything I can to give my child a chance to find out about theirs.

Good luck with getting the bloods all sorted and hopefully you can start soon....

Felix - when are you due to start again? The time seems to be flying by. Can't believe I'll be ready for basting again in 7-10 days....not sure it's a good thing to keep wishing my life away like this. But on the other hand am looking forward to having another go!

Laura
x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Sorry Em, ignore the question about IUIs - I should have read your signature first (not having a good day today...work is very stressful) and have just read your reply on the medicated vs unmedicated thread as well....makes sense now

Think I will be moving to IVF in April too if no luck with Feb/March IUIs. Just don't want to hang around anymore. Partic with work being so awful, can't wait for maternity leave....

Laura
x


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## Roo67

Evening ladies,

Emma - glad you've made your decision and its one that youn are happy with. Hope your GP will do your bloods. I was my practice nurse this week and asked her if I could get my bloods done there and she said yes.    So just need to wait for AF to arrive (whilst I'm in this country   ) So will probably be march.

Laura - It soon comes around again doesn't it - i felt I had just got over the disapointment of a negative, then before you know it you're off again. Hope this one is the one for you. Just bumped into an old work colleague today and her 5 week old little girl, rubbing it in about 9 months mat leave  

Felix - How are you doing hun - are you able to go again soon ?

Suzie - how are you ? great to meet with you this week and thanks for all the info. Can't wait to get back from my hols to get the ball rolling again.

Hi to everyone else

Roo xx


----------



## kylecat

Hey girls - thought I'd post on this thread as it seems the most relevant. I wanted to ask the question, how many goes at IUI would you consider before moving on to another form of treatment e.g. IVF? I will have my first go at IUI at the beginning of march, if its not suucessful then I hope to try again in april, may and poss june. As some of you know I am a teacher and I'm lucky enough to have a few weeks off in the summer starting around mid July. I was thinking that if IUI hadnt proved successful by then, maybe I could progress onto IVF over the summer as it would be easier not being at work during that time. Or I could wait until the summer of 2009 when I will be 37 and a half - I am 36 and 2 months now. Obviously I am getting a little ahead of myself as I havent begun the IUI's yet but I was just thinking ahead. I am trying to be as   as poss but like to have another plan up my sleeve. I undertand that IVF is a different ball game altogether as I saw my sister go through it but as Laura has said in previous posts it does have a better success rate. So basically I was just interested in how many IUI you would consider before progressing onto something else - any opinions gratefully recieved!!!

Thanks everyone  

Katiexxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wow it is all go on here, bastings looming.  Emma so pleased that you have decided where you want treatment.
I went for my final scan, the sonographer said that she didn't think I had ovulated this month, as there was no corpus leutem, or follicles over the month. But I know that you don't ovulate every month! I have to have bloods on Monday and see what the progesterone levels were like and then start cyclogest suppositories!

I have also rung the IVF to see if they would keep me on viarga throughout the cycle, they'll call me back tomorrow.  My donor has booked in with a recommended acupuncturist in his town so is seeing him on Mon- he is good to me.  seeing the consultant next Thurs so we'll see what he has to say- hopefully he'll hand me back to the the IVF clinic and I can get cycling in Feb!

Kylecat I've just seen your post, I really wouldn't wait for another 2 years if things don't work out, I started at 37 - don't forget your fertility takes another nosedive at 38ish- but here I am 3 years later and still no further on..

Have a good evening
L x


----------



## Damelottie

I wouldn't wait either Kylecat - especially because you are so positive and sure of having treatment. I've delayed because I found myself needing more time but for you.................... go for the IVF in the summer     . Well you asked for opinons


----------



## kylecat

Thanks JJ1 and emma - makes good sense to be proactive by the sounds of it and not leave things too late! I shall def take that on board. Sounds like things are getting busy with you JJ1- good luck with the blood tests - hope all goes well. Won't be long before you're off again. Hope you don't mind me asking why are you given viagra during IVF - does it improve the success rates?

Katiexx


----------



## some1

Katie 

I'm grappling with this one too (and thinking about IVF in the summer holidays!).  

I'm going to speak to my clinic and get my bloods done again before I make any decisions.  I have been really fixed on wanting to keep things as simple and natural as possible, but just beginning to wonder if I should go for the biggie and have IVF - the potential big bonus with this is the possibility (and it is just a possibility) of having some embryos to freeze and use for siblings in a few years time.

Some1

xx


----------



## kylecat

Thanks some1 for your reply - I didnt realise you were a teacher as well? or maybe I have got your occupation completely wrong - sorry if I have!  

Its a hard decision deciding what to do - I suppose I could leave it and try IVF over the xmas holidays but obviously then there would be problems with clinic opening times too. I also figure that having 5 weeks off might allow me to have IVF at one of the London clinics where the success rate is higher. Does anyone know if the ARGC treat single women using donor sperm - I suspect not. My sister and her husband went there 4 years ago and were extremely impressed with the treatment they recieved - however it is horrendously expensive.

Its a hard decision to make some1 - I'm kind of hoping my clinic might be able to sway me in one direction or another. It just seems that the IUI technique has such a low chance of working and that worries me - I certainly don't want to offend anyone by saying this as there are probably lots of people who it has and is working for. But I suppose all we have to go on is the statistics,

Thanks everyone

Katiexxx


----------



## some1

Katie - I am also hoping my clinic might sway my decision - have a feeling they won't though - thank goodness for this site to help in the decision making process!  

I'm not a teacher, but I do work in a school (Learning Mentor) - working in a school does make it more difficult to fit in clinic appointments doesn't it! I think IVF in the summer is a much better option than Christmas - I would just find that too difficult and stressful.

Some1
xx


----------



## Zoopy

Hey there . Just wanted to add that i've been going through the same thoughts, and i'd be keen to go straight to IVF unless the clinic strongly advised otherwise, because of the higher success rates for those of us with lowered fertility. IUI might prove costly in terms of time and money, and draining on the emotions too. Not worth it maybe if it's very unlikely to succeed. 

Just to stress that i've had no expert advise on this one! Made it up for myself.


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi Zoopy,
Know how you feel, after being told that I'd be better off going straight for IVF and having spoken to a friend who is now pregnant after IVF, I feel it is the way forward for me..... Yes it is expensive, but has such a higher success rate, plus the age thing.  It's a lot of decisions isn't it!

No one can say we go into this half hearted!
Take care everyone
Rachel x


----------



## suzie.b

Hi girls

Just thought I'd mention the earlier (younger) you go for IVF the better.  Fertility nosedives after 35.  Older eggs tend to be more fragile and less likely to survive IVF.  If you can afford to do IUIs first, then try it.  Otherwise, I'd suggest going straight to IVF.

Also, don't have IVF round Christmas - it's such an emotional time anyway.  I tried it at Xmas and it was horrible.

Roo, I loved meeting up with you and had a great time.  Just a shame I had to rush off.  I'd love to meet up again if you fancy it - it's good to discuss things in an obsessive way that other people just aren't interested in.  Hope you have a good time next week.  Great news about your nurse doing your bloods.  Hope the wait doesn't seem too long .  I had to have my depot a couple of days ago - realised on the day that it had to be done then.  Talk about panic!

Sorry I'm a bit out of touch with what everybody's doing - my computer keeps playing up, going slow and crashing.  Probably need a new one but I'm going to wait until I am well and truly pg before I even thiink about it.  I have better things to spend my money on .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Damelottie

Felix - how are you?


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Kylecat- Viagra is for endometrium lining issues it increase blood flow to the endometrium-as does oestrogen and aspirin.  I don't recommend it though headaches and burning eyes when you start- but get used to it and unfortunately no bonus side effects   which is probably a good thing as no man around! well none that belong to me or would appreciate me!
L x


----------



## Felix42

Hello all, I'm just trying to catch up after my weekend away.  Sounds like quite a few people are considering IVF at the moment.  Although IUI can and does work as we can see on some other threads, at least you do get to know exactly what is happening with IVF and the chances are better.  I'm almost thinking maybe I should just have gone for one IUI and then straight on to IVF.  It is very expensive but I guess so are numerous unsuccessful IUIs.

Wishing everyone lots of luck whatever you decide.  I seem to have ovulated early this month so might be starting again sooner than the end of the month.  

Felix xx


----------



## kylecat

Felix - just wanted to say that it all sounds promising for your next go at IVF - wishing lots and lots of luck      !!

Let us know when you have any updates!

Katiexx


----------



## dottiep

Well I've been doing a whole lot of thinking this weekend....
I had originally booked appt at the clinic for tomorrow to start another cycle of IUI, however I'm seriously considering moving on to IVF.  Given the low success rates for my age with IUI I wonder if I should give myself the maximum chance & just go for it.  I know 2 tries at IUI isn't many but I'm already 43 & really don't have much time. I've also been considering whether to use donor eggs as this ups the stats hugely.... I would prefer to use my own eggs if at all possible but again am worried my egg quality is too poor and it won't work or result in miscarriage, then am worried about the statistics for Downs,  The best way it seems to me to prevent agaisnt all of this is to use donor eggs but I'm not sure I want to use donated eggs & donated sperm  I've read the stuff some1 posted about the genetic imprint of the birth mother but I'm still torn....
Is there a failsafe test for egg quality??  Will they be able to tell after egg collection and/or fertilisation how good your eggs are??
Advice anyone..................

Thanks
Dx


----------



## Bluebelle Star

Dottie I don't have answers, but just wanted to say I wish you the best of luck with deciding between IUI and IVF. Hopefully you can have a good talk with your clinic and they can guide you? 
I myself am contemplating going straight for IVF due to my PCOS.

Best wishes


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Dottie,

Hopefully someone who knows a bit more about it will be along to help with your questions - JJ1 is usually a font of knowledge on these sorts of issues   I don't think there is a test which will definitely tell you the quality of your eggs, but I suspect between EC and ET they will get a good sense of it as they will see how many fertilise. From reading the IVF boards, they seem to grade the embryos so presumably if you get low grade ones that may be an indication of poor egg quality. But I'm not sure about that, so don't take my word for it. Of course this would mean you would need to pay for at least one go at IVF with your own eggs to see how your embryos developed. 

I'm going to do 3 IUI and then most likely move to IVF myself. In all honesty I just can't see the IUI's working - maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised but the success rates are so low that I guess I'm only doing it to feel that I gave it a go before moving to IVF. I will do this cycle unmedicated now, then a medicated cycle, then ask the clinic about IVF. I imagine (again not sure) that they would be able to give you some indication of your success rates for IVF based on how you have responded to the IUIs. Do you have a consultation booked? Might be worth talking it over with them and seeing what they think.

Once you move to donor eggs, I believe the wait lists are pretty long here in the UK, so you would need to go overseas. Which means anonymous sperm (not sure if this was an issue for you?). It's all so complicated isn't it....

Good luck wuth the decision process - hope LWC can give some good advice tomorrow
Laura
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Dottie - I am sort or torn the same way as you hun, I have never done IUI's through a clinic ( did 4 AI's at home) as our sperm is not of good enough quality so opted for ICSI straight away to give me the best odds. I also had a friend who was of a similar age to me when I started (36-7) and she had a year of 6 IUI's( inc medicated) at LWC and then switched to IVF and got pregnant on her first go and subsequent cycles at LWC.

Have you had a AMH test ? - Not sure if it tells you about quality or just quantity left. I haven't had it, and asked about having it last week, but the consultant said that by having 3 cycles of IVF and never been a great responder it is immaterial, as he knows that the infomation that they are trying to gain.

The consultant said to me that I have two known problems - older eggs that are poor to respond (although my embryo quality wasn't bad on the first and last IVF cycle I don't knwo anything about the chromosomes) and a poor lining and gave me a less than 5 % chance of coneiving with my own eggs and a >40% chance of m/c, as chromosomally there can be issues (although we have both had chromosome blood tests that came back ok), without the downs factor coming into it.

However he did explain that with donor eggs they are more robust and as younger less chromosonal probelms and hence the chances of conceiving are so much higher 40-50% odds for me (>6-70% for other women).

I may have one last shot with my own eggs depending on what the ARGC say- but my worst fear would be getting a  and then m/cing again and knackering my lining and never be able to have the chance of DE. My donor's partner thinks I should have one last go with my own.

Surprisingly I have accepted the idea of donor eggs, and was worried that I hadn't thought of DE as a tough decision or grieve my own eggs, but I think that if you give to birth to the baby as well you are its mother, with the DE they are only giving you one cell, they rest if down to your body to feed/nuture and grow the baby. My friends who adopt will be just as fantastic mums and haven't given birth.

They can do PGD on embryos before putting back but I think the results are slight dubious now, as a woman got a chromosomally abnormal embryos put back and the baby had the disease they were screening for. Plus it is a few thousand pounds extra and I think that they need a larger crop of embryos as they is a very small chance that they can get damaged is my understanding.

I also go to a great fertility accpuncturist Daniel Elliott on Harley St - Tues and Thurs (elswhere the rest of the week) and he gives me great advice, he also had over 1500 babies conceived last year and deals with all the clinics http://www.londonacupuncture.co.uk/ 
I had this discussion with him about IUI's and older women and he said that he thought there is some mileage in it, we lack sperm and (the majority of us) don't have infertility problems (male or female) that the other women doing to clinics that the stats are also based on.

I would ask the clinic their opionon honest opinion or stats for you/your age for IUI, medicated IUI and IVF or DE IVF and see what they say. I think realistically if you are considering DE then abroad is the only option for us due to the long waits in the UK.

Dottie maybe some of the FF girls on the double donation thread can help you- some of the girls are/were on here as well- Hollysox, Suzie b, Charlotte's web etc 
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=115620.315
Hope that the consultation goes well tomorrow.
L x

/links


----------



## Damelottie

Hi Dottie

Sorry if this is obvious  but they can tell the quality of your eggs via IVF. I remember being on holiday in Athens with an embryologist who lived there. He asked me if I'd like to spend the Sunday in the clinic with him - he had to go in as some eggs were ready for fertilisation that morning. We looked at them through the microscope thing and he pointed out that they were quite poor quality. Fascinating stuff. I remember thinking about the women.

Thats one of the reasons why I want to go straight for IVF. If I have got crap eggs I'll find out.

Its a tough decision.

Good luck with it

Emma


----------



## dottiep

Thanks everyone for your advice.  I didn't know about PGD but have been doing a bit of research........ maybe that's what I'll do with my own eggs...mmmmmmmm??
I've emailed a couple of clinics in spain thisevening to find out about waiting times & costs....

Good luck on this (sometimes scary) journey.....

Dx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Dottie I emailed IM and IVI in Barcelona and they got back to me within 24 hours with application forms, also Ceram in Marbella, other people speak highly of IM Madrid and IVI Valencia- some also do 3 cycle price packages.
L x


----------



## Felix42

Hello there Dottie.  I'm in a similar position to you and am definitely keen to go for IVF now that I've had two unsuccessful IUIs.  With IVF at least you do get the chance to know what is happening at every stage and even though I was personally given low odds of success at IVF, I'm still keen to try it with my own eggs first.  If I go on to donor eggs later I will at least feel that I've tried everything else possible first.

Good luck with what you decide!

Felix xx


----------



## dottiep

Felix,

Apologies if I've missed a post, but when are you cycling again??

Dx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Dottie how was the follow up appt? hope they were helpful in your decision making
L x


----------



## dottiep

Thanks for asking, but I've moved to Wed....will keep you posted.
Hope you're ok?

x


----------



## winky77

Hi Dottie, 

I'm similar age to you and Felix....am 41 now.  I had the AMH done up here in Scotland in December and got a good result (17). The nurse said that would mean good quality as well as good quantity but I must admit I've not talked in detail with the consultant about it. As I'm getting actual IUI at LWC (cos no tartan wrigglies up here !!) and LWC don't do AMH there's not been much discussion about it there either. Right now I'm still being optimistic as only just starting out but I am sure just one BFN will make me focus much more on the tests/stats etc.  I know that I don't want to spend months and months doing IUIs with no success....prob will do 2 or 3 before going to IVF....and then as Emma has pointed out , there should be more info about quality of eggs which may also mean take next step of DE route - have honestly not thought that far yet tho.  However, I do like what JJ said about the one cell is all you're getting with DE and what Some1 said previously about genetic imprints...the nuture bit has to be what makes the biggest impact.  Just had this fire analogy come into my head!??!?.....am thinking the egg and the sperm are like the flint/matches creating the spark but it is our bodies that have to provide the right environment to get the fire going and keep it burning for 9 months....and that's the tougher job...! 

heck....tis late and I'm getting strangely poetic so must mean it's time for bed !!!  Sorry girls!

ps....JJ ...you are amazing....I am in awe    of your amazing knowledge...we are lucky to have you to share it with us xx


----------



## Felix42

In answer to your Q Dottie, I'm starting as soon as my next AF arrives which could be at the end of this week. 

I hope your appointment goes well on Wednesday. I got my consultation free after two unsuccessful IUIs. Hope that works out the same for you. Also if they mention getting on the waiting list for DE, I would say why not as there's no commitment and more choice ultimately should you want to go for Plan B (or even C!). 

Just back from a disappointing date. Lovely chap but I feel like I let myself down somehow. I should have left sooner but I was enjoying his company even though I didn't think he was especially keen on me. Oh well, given the search for a soulmate no longer has a timelimit, I must admit I feel disappointed but not devasted (as I might have felt before this journey!). 

Lots of  to all the single girls! 

Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Oh bad luck Felix - I hate that feeling xxxxxx


----------



## Felix42

Too right Emma.  He's not been in contact since (even to just say thanks and nice to have met you) and I must admit I think that's bad manners so no loss there.  Walk on....

Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Oh yes............ move straight on. No excuse at all for bad manners like that. I met a guy once who clearly didn't like me at all and did very little to hide it even though I'd driven 3 hours to see him.
I text to say I'd got home alright and he never even replied. I could have carked it on the motorway for all he knew. Grrrrrrr. He was one of the arty, beautiful, sensitive ones - you know the type on there!!!!!!!!


----------



## Felix42

Absolutely!  If someone checks I got home safely, they go zooming up in my expectations & if they don't, well!!  Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't even consider their date's safety.  Got a lunch date tomorrow.  

F xx


----------



## Damelottie

Ooooh - well done. Geographically, I'm in such a bad area to meet people casually like that. I really wish I could. I'm talking to a couple in Leicester though and thats at least only a 30 min drive or train journey so a bit better. It limits my choices somewhat.    that sounded awful


----------



## Felix42

Ah but you're only looking for one I take it Emma? 

Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Oh yes - one would do it  

I'm in an odd place with it though. I need a certain amount of attention but I don't trust men at all who fall in love quickly. Been burned with that one too many times. Fall in quickly - fall out just as quickly. Haha - oooh, I'm such a romantic fool


----------



## Felix42

Me too. I don't trust people who fall too soon. It just doesn't feel personal does it?!

F xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

ooh love hearing about the dating- but no intention of going down that route just yet!!

Have any of you thought about GIFT, http://www.lfc.org.uk/content.php?id=37&pid=10
UCH seem to use it a bit. I am not a candidate as count not great.

Take care
L x

/links


----------



## dottiep

JJ - I'm not sure what it is


----------



## dottiep

Sorry just caught up with posts........not sure what I'll do with 5 days away...I'll never catch up, there's so much going on here!

Di - thanks for your post - I liked your analogy!

Felix - yes, they've said consultation is free as had 2 IUI's and considering IVF -who did you see as a matter of interest? Will consider what you said about wait list for DE in UK, although not sure I have a year left  Sorry to hear date wasn't great...where on earth do you find them all??  I've practically given up hope of ever dating again!  You, too Emma...I need some tips fom you lot on how to meet people.............

Dx


----------



## Damelottie

Internet dating Dottie! And a friend has recently introduced me to her bro-in-law.

Has anybody elses screens gone funny?

I'm the same Felix. I just don't see how anybody could 'fall in love' with me after a few dates as I wouldn't have even begun to tell them anything about me. In the past I've trusted their emotions and allowed myself to get excited. And then fell hard when I didn't turn out to be the person they thought I was. I found out today that the love of my life got married. We split up 9 years ago but its funny how I suddenly realised I was still holding onto those feelings. I'd have left any of the other men if he'd come along - even though I did love some of them. Feel irrationaly bl00dy sad about it


----------



## Felix42

Emma. That is really hard. Its terrible how things can surprise you like that when you think you are over it. 

Take care of yourself, but it probably helps to let yourself feel the sadness and then move on. 

Felix xx


----------



## Damelottie

Thanks Felix

I've just had a morose sad evening. But I'll move on - what choice is there?

Let me know how lunch goes xxx


----------



## marmite_lover

Big   Emma, it must be very difficult - I think it is very natural to feel sad no matter how long ago it was.  My ex-h is now engaged to someone else.  It was completely my fault we split up and his new fiancee is lovely and I am genuinely pleased that he is happy again but i can't help to occasionally think what if...  I find it particually hard to think about them having a child together (he never used to want kids).  They only live around the corner - I dread bumping into them and a little one  

Felix - that is terrible manners and his loss completely.  Hope your lunch date goes well - I love heading all about your dates


----------



## Damelottie

Thanks Karen

Its def thrown me off track a bit. There won't be any baby news from them at least. They both have children in their late teens and he had a vasectomy many years ago. I'd have even given up my baby dream to stay with him. Oh well.........it wasn't to be. Although that is also some of my doing but I have to live with that.


 to you too xx


----------



## Felix42

Hope you're feeling better today Emma. That is a lot to take in. How did you find out?

Well the lunch date went well. Nice chap, not sure there was much chemistry but if he asks me to meet up again I'd go to see whether anything develops. 

But more excitingly my AF arrived today - a week early! So off for scan/bloods tomorrow am and fingers crossed IVF this time.  

Hope everyone is well! Have a fantastic skiing long weekend Dottie. I'm very jeallous. 

F xx


----------



## kylecat

Hey girls! Hope we are all well  

Emma - was so sorry to read about your ex - what a shock to find out that information - I expect you were feeling really fed up yesterday - I hope you are feeling a little better today   Go out and treat yourself to something!! 

Felix - great news that AF has arrived - keeping all my fingers crossed for you - I really hope that the bloods are good this time and it will be all systems go   . Keep enjoying that dating! 
Katiexx


----------



## Damelottie

Ooh Felix - a good day all round then    . Will you find out tomorrow if the IVF goes ahead?
The ex is a director in the NHS. He was my manager when we met. Typically he started to work at the trust that my sister links with in her job. My sis has been been very careful over the years to not tell me things unless I ask. I know she has always found it difficult knowing whether to say anything she ever hears about him.
I hadn't asked her anything for ages but yesterday I did. I just asked if she's heard anything from him/seen him at any meetings etc recently. So she told me that she'd heard he might have got married. Thats her way of gently saying that he has. And he's moved to another PCT area now too. Stupidly I googled him and some pictures came up  . I won't do that again in a hurry.

Anyway - my clearview ovulation kit asked for the first pee stick today. Just the prolatin test to have now and I'll make my first LWC consultation appt. How much did it cost Felix?

And then I have a problem. I don't know how to find the money. I thought I had a plan but its not possible. Does the LWC 2 for the price of 3 deal include the drugs? I bet it doesn't  

Thanks for your support Felix and Katie.

Emma x


----------



## kylecat

Hi Emma - just saw your post and had a look at the info the LWC clinic sent me when I was considering them before Xmas. Unfortunetly there is a footnote at the bottom of their price list which states that all drugs are extra on top of IVF treatment   . However I am having drugs for my first IUI cycle and the course of puregon which I was given cost £76 which I thought was pretty reasonable. However I'm not sure if different quantities of drugs are used for IVF treatment? I expect one of the other girls will know more

Take care  

Katiexx


----------



## Felix42

For drugs its potentially another £1000 unfortunately. LWC do IVF drugs packages but shopping around I've managed to get it a bit cheaper. Ali's Chemist in Shadwell (tel 02077909150). 

Hope that helps. 

F xx


----------



## Damelottie

Thats great Katie - thank you.
I didn't think it would be included somehow  

OOOH - posts crossed Felix.

I've heard that Ali's chemist is the cheapest too. Although I shall be BEGGING my GP for his help


----------



## Betty-Boo

I've missed so much..

Agree with you totally Felix - howvery dare he not even check you got home safely!  Cheek!  Good luck with all the tests x

Emma, have been in your situation, it hurts, but at least we can learn from it.  I too have fallen quickly before and fell out of 'love' even quicker - felt so let down - or perhaps am just too darn fussy!

Have paid for my danish wigglies and have my first IVF meeting on the 5th March - the wigglies don't arrive until beginning of April, so have a bit more time to work at the diet - yeah who am I kidding!  The info I received on the wigglies was fantastic - including a letter for the child, which did make me blub...

Good luck everyone else, it's all sort of becoming a bit more of a reality now.......

Take care 
Rachel xxxxx


----------



## kylecat

Rachel - the info you got sounds amazing. How lovely that you were given a letter from the donor - gives your more of an idea of what his motivation behind the donation was  

Good luck with the IVF - hope all goes well for you   Which clinic are you having the IVF at?

I may be considering IVF myself this Summer (if I need it!) - however I'm finding it hard to get my head round this type of treatment, especially when all my tests have been normal and if I were in a relationship I would hopefully be able to get pregnant naturally - oh well needs must!!! 

Katiexx


----------



## Damelottie

That would have made me blub too Rach


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi Katie,

Must admit it did take a while to get my head round IVF as am in same situation - nothing wrong with fertility apart from the obvious - no SPERM!   

Am having my treatment down on Plymouth, so happy as I emailed my previous doctor who's more than happy to see me through the IVF... 

Take care everyone x x x


----------



## Damelottie

Thats really helpful Lou - thanks. Thats isn't as scary as I thought.
Hopefully I wouldn't need much more than that xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Hi Girls
Just a quickie as knackered and just got in from work- oh how I love owrking 9-5 in the NHS!!!!  AF arrived today and I even missed the lab opening/closing so a colleague bled me. 

Emma - so sorry to hear about the Love of your life- my friend at work -who is a relationship for 22 years -used to talk to about her Love of her life (a dif man) then she met him at a conference and he was horrid to her and quickly fell of his pedestal.  I also googled my first bf and love of my life and his now a rather rotund looking man and something big in HR for Europe in a large company- where I recall him as as 18 and gorgeous!

Enjoy the skiing dottie have fun.

Felix - date sounds better today!

Rachel- Yeah the      are on their way!!!

Katie- where did you get Puregon so cheaply!!! please tell I used to pay 360 pounds a day for a puregon pen. and the Bridge wanted to charge me 4860 pounds for my  GOnal F pens on my second cycle

There is a thread where to get cheap drugs from I found healthcare at home and pharmasure good value-and  Ali in Tamworth is supposed to be the cheapest for Menopur etc, Boots.com for Viarga at 4 pounds a tablet, whereas clinic charge me 10 per tablet.

Take care folks
L x


----------



## Felix42

Hello there, just a me me post and apologies in advance. IVF cancelled again today - my FSH is 18 this time - up from 14 last time ( and the now fantastic looking 11.4 and 6.5 of a few months back). I'm going home from work shortly as I feel like a good cry!

I'm sure I'll feel more positive again soon but its looking rather bleak at the moment. 

Love and hugs to all, Felix xx


----------



## kylecat

Oh Felix - I'm so sorry to hear your news. I think going home is a good idea - it's hard to put on a brave face at work  . Did the clinic give you any idea of why your FSH has gone up? I have read threads somewhere on this site about people taking agnus castus and wheatgrass juice to lower FSH - might be worth looking into once you feel a bit more positive,

Take care of yourself  

Katiexxx


----------



## Bluebelle Star

Felix I'm so sorry to hear about your IVF being cancelled, 

BIG HUGS


----------



## Damelottie

Oh I don't believe it. Felix - I'm so so sorry   

You are quite right to go hom from work. We shouldn't be trying to push ourselves going through this - its just so horrible.

Katie is quite right that there are links on here about FSH and how to increase it. I think acupuncture is thought to be quite good too.

I wish I could say more but take care of yourself for now. Have that good cry and see how you feel in a couple of day.

Much love

Emma xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Felix    You take care of yourself, a good cry helps.  All I can give is a virtual hug, but it's well meant and with lots of feeling.  
Take care
Rachel x x


----------



## Felix42

Morning all, thanks ever so much for your kind words Katie, Bluebelle, Emma, Rachel, Ju and Lou.  They really helped.  It is so lovely to know people are thinking of you.   and  

I didn't do any crying last night in the end (except for physical pain!) as I had a migraine and had to go straight to bed as soon as I came home.  Finally managed to get off for a bit a sleep and then woke at 3am without any pain.  Since then I've been thinking and thinking and thinking and I am feeling much more positive.

I'm going to make my first acupuncture appointment today and get started on that and then am going to have monthly Day 1 or 2 FSH tests just in case things improve.  If that doesn't work then at least I'm on the DE waiting list and can look forward to that.  In the meantime I'm thinking thank goodness I didn't put my life on hold.  This dream is very important to me and it will happen but life goes on (happily) and I have lots of other things to be grateful for in the meantime.

Thank you once again for all your support - to those mentioned and to all my other friends here - it means so much.  We will all join our Singles Graduates   in realising our dream, even if it's not necessarily how we first thought we might!  Life afterall works in mysterious ways sometimes.  

Love and hugs to all (and lots and lots of    to those on 2WW and treatment just now)

Felix xx

PS unsurprisingly I cancelled last night's date!


----------



## Felix42

Thanks Ju!  I wondered who the other insomniac might be 

I'm now trying to work out whether it is better to go back to bed for a bit or get up and have done with it.  Feeling pretty exhausted now though so I might try the former.  Hope you're doing ok hun?

Felix xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Felix,
You take care of yourself.  I've yet to start down my path of IVF, and in some ways am quite scared of it all!
Hope the appointment goes well - and yes I would've cancelled the date last night too.
Take care hope the migraine's lifted.

Rachel x


----------



## marmite_lover

Hi Felix - I am so sorry your cycle was cancelled, I can only imagine how disappointing that must have been , but like JU21 I am in awe of your strength and determination.  You will get there hun, I'm sure of that and one day this will thsi will all seem liek a horrible dream.  Hope the migraine has gone, take it easy and pamper yourself this weekend.  xxx


----------



## Damelottie

Hi Felix 

Glad the migraine has gone now, and you're feeling more positive  

So true waht you said about our journey not always going the way we planned. I was 100% going to adopt and never go down this road instead  . And here I am................



Emma x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Felix -  

So sorry your IVF got cancelled again...but it sounds from all the posts that there are things you can do to lower your FSH. You have a really great positive mental attitude (wish some of it would rub off on me...I'm only on day 3 of 2WW and I'm already planning how to juggle meetings for next IUI since I'm sure this one won't have worked...!)

Good luck with the acupuncture, and take care
Laura
x


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Oh Felix I am sorry  

Good luck getting your acupuncture appt, I had a series of treatment and couple of years ago and it was great - no one knows why I went as have always been really scared of needles but I found it really helpful.  I am quite a fan of complementary therapies.

Your strength & determination puts me to shame!  Like Laura I think I could do with some of your positivity rubbing off on me.

Hope you have something nice planned for the weekend

Love 
Jovi x


----------



## some1

Hello Felix - so sorry to hear that your IVF has been cancelled.  I really admire the way you are handling this - I'm sure a positive attitude makes a real difference (in all aspects of life) and I think acupuncture sounds like a great idea.  Big   for you - you will get there in the end!

Some1

xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Felix I have just seen on this thread that your FSH has meant that your cycle has been cancelled.  Glad that you are considering acupuncture- where are you going I can't recommend Daniel Elliot enough and he is so knowledgeable. Have you considered a consultation with the Lister as they are a clinic that doesn't get hung up on FSH and lets women who are turned away elsewhere cycle but they are also successful Dr Marie/Maria is apparently very good with older women and FSH's- it might be worth a one off consultation- they also treat single women and have sperm. I met one of the girls at the London Meet last week and she was there (and pregnant).

Also FSH does vary and I am a firm believer that stress is a factor- mine was 10.5 in Nov, 9.5 in Jan and this month back in the 6's- which it hasn't been for a year. I also had them done on day 1 this month.

I really home that everything works out.

Take care L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi everyone,
Am after some advice, I've had my initial DIVF consult, paperwork all signed, now to the next bit...  My consultant needs my ovarian reserve results and has recommended an AMH test, does anyone know when in your cycle this should be done?  He did say it didn't matter as it's not like the FSH etc tests which are date specific, but having googled it am now getting confused!
Am looking to start my first cycle in June / July time having imputed my sperm from Denmark.
Many thanks
Rachel x x


----------



## dottiep

Hi Rachel,

I'm no expert but from what I understand, the AMH test can be done on any day...

Dx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Hi Rachel,

Afraid I can't help either, but I'm sure one of girlies here has actually had the AMH test - hopefully they will be along soon to give you some advice. Good luck - very exciting that you are so well on your way now  

Laura
x


----------



## Zoopy

Hi Rachel

I had my AMH test, and the inhibin-B test, also an indicator of ovarian reserve (apparently the most advanced test). I had AMH done on day three of my period, with the other tests, but I'm not sure if that was a requirement or not. Why not phone an alternative clinic to get a second opinion? 

I've had AMH done at both the Lister and London Women's Clinic, both on day three. You could call and ask one of those what they do. You could even try calling NHS Direct actually.

Good luck

zoop x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Thanks Zoopy, Laura and D
Day 3 seems to be the popular answer on google, will do as you suggested though and contact some of the clinics tomorrow.  Just want to get things moving as this is the last step before the big bang so to speak.  Can't believe that my IVF appointment was nearly a year to the day since I'd first seen my consultant for chat regarding having a baby.  Ah well.
Now for my little Danish wigglies to arrive - was mortified the other day, reading my donors profile and I'm actually old enough to be his mum!  The horror - then again they'll hopefully be virile little things and do the trick!   
Take care everyone and thanks
Rachel x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Oh my gosh I thought I had everything planned out and AF to arrive next week maybe Tues/Wed and then start cycling but today day 23 I have that bloating feeling and think she is on her way- which might mean I kick off tomorrow!!  

I had acupuncture yesterday,my usual therapist was on leave so had someone else - I was expecting AF on 18/19th next week- but I think AF is about to start !! I have never had a 23 day cycle in my life!! I really hope everything is ok and it doesn't get cancelled for some reason before I've even started.

L x


----------



## Roo67

Oh how exciting you may be starting sooner than expected JJ1 - any news? fingers crossed that you go ahead as planned.

I managed to find an expert this morning to take my bloods ( after 3 failed attempts yesterday !)
Results not good 

FSH 23.4
LH 10.2 and 
Oest 82,

don't know why FSH is so high, I know it can vary but mine just seems to climb each time I have it taken. Am going to e-mail Stephan from Reprofit and see what he says.

Roo xx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Wow JJ1 exciting, any sign of AF?  Really really hope it all works out.

Roo sorry I'm pretty rubbish when it comes to blood results, hope Stephan can give you some good advice, do let us know how you get on x


----------



## kylecat

hi girls - hope all is well!

JJ1 - good luck for your IVF cycle - sounds like you might be starting sooner than you thought if AF arrives early - please keep us all updated  

Rachella - sounds like it's all systems go for you! When does the sperm arrive from Denmark? Sounds like your donor is lovely and young and virile!!    - I am keepimg my fingers crossed for you  

Roo - sorry to hear that your were disappointed with your test results. As Jovi says I don't really know much about what the 'normal' levels should be but I hope that your doctor from reprofit can shed some light on it all for you,  

Katiexxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Roo I hope that you get FSH sorted, the Lister is a clinic in London, who treat women with higher FSH and don't get hung up on it, also did you have bloods taken on day 1 (I have found this is always the day that mine is lowest and it varies- and my acupuncturist is doing a study of diurnal variation of FSH and which day is the lowest reading. Acupuncture can help get FSH down, angus cactus is one of the things mentioned on here too. Best of luck and I hope Stephan is helpful.

Also maybe ask him if having IVF maybe the short protocol may be better,and cetrotide as well this helps dampening down the LH (always a problem for me) and close monitoring at least every 24 hours.

Well AF arrived in full flow last night (well as full as I get) and so I descended on ARGC's doorstep first thing this a.m but they are used to neurotic women!!  I had bloods done (another trauma and tears before I even sat down and had chosen my phlebotomist!!), the clinic rang me this afternoon and I can proceed:
FSH 8.1
LH 3.5
Oestrodial 121
prolactin 301

So more bloods at 0730 tomorrow and baseline scan and my Puregon arrives in the morning post, cetrotide sat!- well I wasn't expecting to need them until Wed! but can buy from the clinic on a daily basis if needed - although they said I would be on  puregon, merional, cetrotide and clomid (I really don't want clomid as it can thin the lining) so have said not happy about it and want to discuss it when I have scan- there may be a good reason for it.

Also my donor's partner will finish his night shift and take my blood as I am better with him doing it in my home! so I just cab it down there for processing.

I have taken heart from one of the girls on the London thread who said everything about this cycle is different so hopefully the outcome will be! Also my donor is going to Ireland to teach and I was saying if AF ran late we would be cutting it fine and him changing plans etc- serves me right for wanting AF to come ealry not late- she must have been listening and zoomed in!!!

Jovi, Katie thanks for the good wishes.

Rachel when are you hoping to start cycling?  
L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Thanks for all the advice - have booked in for AMH a week Monday.  Plan on starting first cycle June July time, that way mum can be with me during egg retrieval etc... to drive me home.  Bless her.  sperm arrive in a couple of weeks!  Still finding his age a bit strange, but its done now, am sure I'll get over that once I've got a babe in arms.  Cousin's just had a baby girl, Lola May, another who is in her 40's is pregnant with twins!  (No IVF - Natural - lucky her!  Yes, am happy for her, but also a little bit peeved.....
JJ1 - sounds like all systems go -  
Roo - am still getting my head round all the blood results and their readings - take care hope the chat with reprofit was productive.
Hello to everyon else!  Take care
Rachel x x


----------



## suzie.b

Rachel - your donor's age sounds great - sort of like a virtual toy boy .  Good luck with it - as you say, they should be full of life and raring to go.

JJ1 - good luck with your cycle - I feel sure that this one is it.  As you say, it starts out different, everything is different, the outcome will be different  .

Katie -  

Jovi -  

Zoopy -  

Laura -  

Dottie -  

Some1 -  

Felix -   - thanks for the good luck messages - they helped 

Roo - sorry you're upset about your FSH levels - maybe you've just had a stressful month - you're certainly busy at the moment so that doesn't help .  We'll have a chat next week if we manage to get together - you're a very busy woman.  I'll just fit in with whatever you can manage .  Thanks for your messages - really appreciated the thought - it's nice to know people are thinking positively for me, particularly in a strange country, so far from home.

Just to say the DEIVF went a lot more smoothly this time.  A bit shocked to only hear today that I have none frozen when on the day of transfer I had four spare blasts and a little slow one.  Also, had a strange small browny purple blood clot thing (sorry TMI) happening yesterday but decided that it is either a leftover from transfer or a sign of implantation.  Prefer the second option, so think I'll go with that one until I hear differently .

Sorry I've been so crap recently about posting.  Just been catching up with reading all the posts and it's taken me days and days and days.

I was thinking of you all though, and sending you all positive vibes, whichever stage everyone is at      .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Suzie, 
    
Have everything crossed for you - Take care of yourself and remember DO NOTHING!  Just chill out.  I know my friend sat there and kept talking to her eggs after tx.  
Lots of    to you too.
Take care
Rachel x x x


----------



## suzie.b

Whoops, Rachel, I'm just like your friend - I keep talking to them, telling them to hang on in there, to get out the baby superglue, to get out their rope and crampons - anything in fact to urge them to stay.  Didn't work last time, but they'll have to stick at some time, so why not now?

It doesn't seem very hard to "do nothing" - my natural state .

Great that you'll have your mum with you during your tx - I had my sperm donor with me during mine which he was quite thrilled about.  A bit embarrassing though when you're naking from the waist down  - when I mentioned how embarrassing it was, he said that he wasn't embarrassed at all - strange that  seeing as he was fully dressed and I was half naked in front of four people.  Hmmmm.  Since seeing them the first time, he is really excited about it all now and even woke up in the middle of the night after dreaming of a name for the girl.  He was going to text me it then thought he ought to wait just in case I was asleep .  I was, naturally.  I got photos this time which I regretted not doing last time.  I never thought I'd say this, but they look so cute .

Good luck with your tx - June/July will be here before you know it - it's only three months away - 12 weeks .

Who is next on the tx list?

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Photos?  Never thought of that - even if you were half naked - it does sound like it was a good experience for you, especially having your donor with you.  What a lovely person he is!
Mmm do I want mum to see me half naked - not sure, but do have a close friend, who's already got title of Aunty/Godmum who also wants to be there...  Beats a night out at the cinema! Only joking, I'm so glad that they're so supportive.  Friend's a Doctor so its good to have her there with me.
Good luck Suzie, I've everything crossed for you and sending lots of    vibes for you.
My friend had her sister stay, she didn't even cook!  Bless her, she's now 18 weeks and positively glowing.  Her and hubby have been trying for 6 years or more, they were lucky at first attempt of IVF.  Pregnancy does suit her. 
Take care and all the best
Rachel x


----------



## suzie.b

Rachel, it was such a better experience than last time - half naked and rolling around on the floor is definitely not my idea of fun!  Might have been entertaining for the other four though   .  This tx went very smoothly and, as you say, was a much better experience.  My sperm donor is a very sweet man who will make a good dad and is already talking about what a wonderful older brother and grandmother his son and his mother will make - after meeting them, I think he's right - they're both lovely people.  I've told him that, as he's already chosen a boy's name, he's not entitled to choose the girl's - I have to have a little input   .

Roo - just to mention - as soon as those embryos were put back inside me, I didn't care where their genes came from - they are MINE!  FSH levels only reflect how responsive you are to the stimming drugs but, as you only need the one egg to be fertilised, high FSH levels do not mean that it's not possible.  Have you asked about the AMH test?  This is supposed to be a more accurate reflection of ovarian reserve.  There again, you only need one good one.  Keeping my fingers crossed that you get that one.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## suzie.b

Yaaaayyy

Managed to get my photo of my little blasts on my profile.  I just can't stop looking at it  .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Suzie love the photo xxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Photos are amazing!  Wow... Will have to see my clinic Can do that too.  Am totally blown away to be honest!
Take care of yourself Suzie, you donor does sound so lively and so supportive!  
Take care, put your feet up and do nothing!

 
Rachel x


----------



## suzie.b

Oh, Rachel, I took my camera in with me - the embies were on a tv screen in the room.  I managed to get three and can't stop taking them out and looking at them - got them as wallpaper on my pc too. 

I don't know about my donor being lively    - he is lovely though  - sometimes .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## dottiep

Quick update from me........got my test results today & FSH has gone down to 6.3! I was really surprised but obviously pleased - it was 9.3 back in November but I was under a lot of stress at the time.  Goes to show that it can change.
I picked up my meds from the clinic today & start injecting tomorrow with next scan on good friday with another booked for easter monday. Obviously depends how follicles develop, but clinic seemed to think egg collection around 28th ..... a bit scared now!

Hope everyone well.
xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Ha ha Suzie - glad you understood what I meant!
so excited for you Dottie!  Good luck... Take care
Rachel x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Suzie- great to meet your embryos- my current clinic don't do it on screen, my first cycle we were give a mounted scan pic of them and then every week through the pregnancy scan, and I do treasure them. Best of luck for the 2ww   .  Your donor sounds really nice- how much involvement is he going to have in with the baby?  Suzie when is test day.  I really hope that you had implantation bleed!!!  Like you say and many others if there is something is different, hopefully so will the outcome be!!!

I think with IVF all your dignity goes out the window, and you get so used to hopping onto scanning tables ! My donors partner comes with me, and for a gay man he isn't used to seeing some bits, but averts his eyes- for his sanity and my modesty   !!  I think you get used to hearing the the words 'naked from the waist down' I was doing some infection control teaching the other day and we have to instruct the Drs to remove their watches and wash their hands etc and the phrase is 'naked from the elbow down'- well didn't I just say 'waist' and the strange looks I got!! I think the Dr thought I liked him, little could I say it was just my IVF brain   !!!

Dottie a great FSH to kick your cycle off, like you I had higher (10.4) and then in the 6's, for this month it was 8.  What drugs and doses are you getting, I'm on 600 IU of Puregon and short protocol, Day 2 today of stimming, I have stimmed for 11 days every cycle so I think EC might be 25th  and ET on 28th.

If you are around Harley Street and fancy a decaf coffee or a pint of milk give me a call/pm as I am in Harley street every morning now until EC and sometimes most of the day as bloods/scans etc later on as well- I cheat a bit and don't queue up with the 80 odd ARGC girls at 0730 every monring for the blood lab, as my donor's partner takes them for me in my living room  and then I just take the bottle in to them (I'm needlephobic so cry +++ and don't think it is fair for the other ladies to see as well, I sob as I walk through the red door even though they have 2 great phlebotomoists there Ayoo and Yousef, and the very skinny lady on the weekend).

My donor's partner is fantastic support, and he takes my blood and gives me all my injections.  My clinic are erractic with times sometimes ring and say 'take this asap' and like tonight take between 2000-2200, so he was on nights and I went to work for a few hours and called into his A&E and had my jab and then home.  I am knackered though, and have to set my alarm to set viagra every 6 hours through the night, and then be up ealry for bloods.

We could be on the 2WW together!!

All this drinking (3 litres of water and one litre of milk) and eating (80 grams) of protein regime is getting to me already.  I feel so fat and full, and know it packs on the pounds, but is supposed to enhance egg quality. I hate having to eat a tin of tuna before bed if I have had enough protein  forced in! Well better go have just finished houmous and 500 mls of banana milk!

Rachel when are you starting?
 
L xx


----------



## suzie.b

JJ1, you really made me laugh at the thought of the doctor thinking you wanting to get him naked    - but only from the waist down.  Hmmm, maybe he wanted to.  Was he nice looking?   

Dottie, when are you starting the cycle, or have you already started? Whoops, just noticed that I'd missed your earlier post (otherwise I'd have responded to it - I'm not really rude) so ignore me - I'm blaming the meds as they seem to make my brain a lot thicker and slower.  Or is that just my excuse ?  Good luck with your stimming tomorrow - hope you get loads of good follies, but not too many to cause problems - just the right amount.  Are you more scared it'll work or that it won't?  The first time I tried, I couldn't decide which was the scariest option.  Of course, now I'm an old hand at IVF, it's definitely the latter.  Good luck      with it all.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## dottiep

Hi JJ,

Gosh you sound so discpline on the diet front!  I managed a large glass of milk a day & lots of brazil nuts. Otherwise really ate as normal - I think I may need to focus a bit more this cycle. I really can't imagine stuffing a tin of tuna down at bed time though!!
I'm doing 250(mg?) a day of puregon starting tomorrow (day 3).  I have scan at 9.45 on friday on harley street - are you around then?? Let me know. If everything goes to schedule we should be 2WW buddies!  

Dx


----------



## dottiep

Suzie - I think our posts crossed.  How are you??  Keeping sane??


----------



## suzie.b

Dottie

Yes, posts crossed - I edited it to add more message to you as I'd missed your last post out for some reason .

On the Reprofit thread, the women have talked about eating red food as well as the brazil nuts to improve your lining.  Is this information useful here or don't you have concerns about your lining?  Just wondered as you did mention egg quality home improvements - milk etc.  I must admit, all I could think of when red food was mentioned was beetroot and I just imagined all these women doing IVF doing red poos.  There's a thought   .

Hope you get exactly what you are hoping for.

Keep drinking the pints - of milk 

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## dottiep

Not heard the red thing before although do love beetroot!  
Funny you should ask what scares me most....I have to admit I am a bit scared of it working if that makes sense?    
Off to drink some milk before bedtime now.........

Take care
dx


----------



## suzie.b

Dottie - I think I'd have to add loads of chocolate flavouring to it - unless it was really cold.  I bought some robinson's lemon barley water the other day - makes water go down really with even just a splash in it.  Gorgeous.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi JJ1
Am hoping to start June July time - mum's a teacher so it will be easier for her to come to the clinic with me then.
On eating the correct foods - have heard the pineapple is good too?  A friend of mine went totally organic and ate loads of protein. Need to really start getting into it.  Times really getting closer and closer.
I've got am AMH test booked for a week Monday then it should be all go from there - hopefully!
Good luck   
Dottie - good luck too, fantastic news on your readings!  Take care and look after yourselves.
Remember - do NOTHING!
Take care
Rachel x x


----------



## suzie.b

Rachel, good luck with your AMH test tomorrow.

Dottie, good luck with starting your jabs.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Felix42

Dottie, great news on your results!  Fingers very firmly crossed this is the one.  I know what you mean about worrying it will work.  The IVF meditation cd I got hold of covers that point and it can't be a bad idea to clear out any last lingering doubts can it.  One of the things it suggests you do is think about and release any thoughts that might have stopped you getting pregnant in the past and you also think of yourself in a protected bubble so that no negativity can get in.  It's all rather lovely.  Thinking of which I might listen even though I'm not doing IVF yet.

Wishing you lots of  with your stims and intensive diet regime (I'm impressed) JJ1.  I laughed so much about the naked from the waist down thing, that I dropped and smashed my phone!  Took a while to piece it all together again.

Ooo, 7 days til testing Suzie.  Lots and lots of baby dust and glue!

Fingers crossed for your AMH tomorrow Rachel. 

Felix xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Girls glad that I gave you a laugh !!  and cost Felix a phone!!  Suzie much love and luck for the home straight of the 2ww.

I haven't heard of eating the red food before - but I did have red peppers, tomatoes and chilli tonight so hope that counts - I have heard about visualising red things whilst stimming but then blue in 2ww- also to use a hot water bottle/heat bag on your abdomen and always keep it warm (wonder if laptop counts??) whilst stimming but not in the 2ww and no hot baths, and no baths at all post EC.

I discovered that Weighwatchers fromage frais has 5 gms of protein in, so not too bad as a top up. Have just finished my pint of milk, had porridge for breakfast and just had rice pudding!

With regards to pineapple, I think it is the pineapple juice we are supposed to drink and either fresh or pressed but not from concentrate and not the pineapple itself. If you search on FF there have been discussions before.

I had my puregon today I felt so bad as I got the call from the clinic to take it asap about 1300- I was standing in the supermarket q- in the slowest lane of course!!- then I got home about 15 mins later and woke my donor's partner up (he's on nights) and had already taken my bloods this morning before he went to bed, but he said he would rather me wake him up and do the injections for me, than me crying, needle in hand trousers down and then getting him.

I started on the viagra suppositories today instead of oral viagra - I am obsessed with leakage, a very common side effect with them! but so far so good, although I am paranoid.

My donor is coming up tomorrow for St Patrick's Day, and he is going to the clinic to deposit me some sperm for freezing - just so that the pressure is off on EC day. 

Rachel- Good luck with the AMH next week- do you have long to wait for results?


----------



## tillie

Hi, this is my 1st post so be prepared its a long one!!
Ive been reading through this forum for the last 5 hours and was in tears.  So many of you have had some really trying and hard times and my heart goes out to all of you that have been through so much heartache.
I feel really low today as have come on yet again......this is my story.
I am 40 years old and have wanted a baby since I was 17 but have tried to go about it the right way so to speak as in meeting Mr Right, falling in love and having children with him.  Unfortunately that hasnt happened, my heart has been broken many times and I have gone from 1 relationship to another (there hasnt been many but none have worked).  I got maried in 2002 but my husband became violent not long after we got married, I had 3 wonderful step children but knew I couldnt bring a child into the marrage as my step children often saw the violence towards me.  I got divorced in 2004 and met a guy.  We started off as mates and slowly got into a relationship. He already had a 8 year old daughter and said he would love more children so I came off the pill after a year.  From the start I knew he wasnt the love of my life and always felt there was something missing but he is a decent guy and a good dad plus we got on really well and were/are friends.  To cut a long story short he walked out on me last May and even though I knew he wasnt right for me I was devasted.  I have to go to hospital on a regular basis and he offered to take me after we split up, I was used to him being there and was too down to say no so he came with me 4 times in 6 weeks.  Even though I missed him I still wanted him in my life as a friend rather than not at all.  He knew I was desperate to have a baby and 1 night we got talking and I asked him if would be happy to still have a child with me, he said yes.  Now I knew in a way I was being a fool as he had treated me bad and here I was offering him sex but on the other hand I hoped I would fall pregnant so had my own selfish reasons for giving him his cake and eating it!  I see him maybe once a week and we go out and also 3/4 nights on my fertile week but unfortunately I havent fallen pregnant.   I am struggling with this so much as my gut instict is telling me what I am doing is wrong but I am so desperate to be a mum.  Part of me feels if I do fall then it will be good that the baby will have his/her father in its life but on the other hand I am worried about any complications.  E.G If either of us meet someone else/him being involved (I know he will want a lot of involvment)/ parenting views etc.  I also feel he may want to get back if I fall but I know we dont work as a couple. I work full time and only have a 1 bed gdn flat but I know the baby will have a loving home and 2 loving parents and I will manage just fine.  I am not well off but hopefully will have £15.000 coming to me this year (hopefully) from my divorce settlement.  Every minute of every day its going round and round in my head to whether I should keep things as I am and carrying on trying with my ex or go for IUI/IVF with a donor.  I have spoken to friends who all understand my predicament and half say stay with what you are doing and half say donor.  I told my mum about me and my ex (well I said I was thinking about it) and she didnt feel it was right.  We have been trying for 12 months now but no joy so I went to the Dr's.  They sent me for a blood test to check I was ovulating and that came back fine and my ex went for semen analasis which also came back fine. My Dr has booked me into the hospitals fertily clinic and Im going there on April 9th.  This week I have blood tests for LH/FSH and Rubella/Chlamydia which she has arranged.  I originally told her I was with a partner as felt she wouldnt want to know otherwise but on my last appointment I was honest and told her the situation, I think she thinks Im a nutter now!!  I said I was also considering donor to which she said she couldnt help but that the consultant I am seeing at Bournemouth Hospital on the 9th is the consultant at The Winterbourne private fertility clinic.   I am so scared I am doing the wrong thing by trying for a baby with my ex and I know if I told him I didnt want to carry on with this now and was going down the donor route he would be devastated.  Part of me feels it would be lovely for my baby (trying to think positive here!) to have a dad in its life but the selfish part of me wants the baby to myself!
If I do decide to go for donor I am also confused with all the info and the costs and what to go for.   I read on 1 post just the medication can be £1000 and the IVF £5000.  Its all the other things they list that confuses me as I dont know what I will need.  I know it will also be a struggle getting time off work for consultations/treatment etc as I have time off now for hospital and dont want to tell them anything about IVF etc.  If only there was a guarentee ah?!
So come on girls opinions please...If you had a decent guy that was willing to be a good dad but you knew it wouldnt work between you romantically and he would financially help (although that part isnt that important to me) and didnt have a lot of money would you stick with him or go it alone.  I know if money wasnt an issue I would prob take the going alone option really.  AArrggggg this is doing my head in.


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Hello Tillie, 

And welcome - glad you found us. This forum has been a huge source of support to me, and I'm sure you'll find it really helpful too...

I think most of us single girls would like to have met Mr Right and had children the 'traditional' way (I personally try not to think of it as the 'right' way, because that implies to have a child any other way is 'wrong' - which I truly do not believe it is - it's just different...) so you're in good company here  

What a difficult time you are having, and a difficult decision to make, I do feel for you. I'm not going to give you any advice as I haven't been in your situation (I didn't have any potential known donor candidates so went straight to anonymous donor through a clinic) and at the end of the day you're the only one who can decide what is right for you. What I will say is that the message I am getting from your post is that you feel quite strongly that having a child with your ex is wrong - so maybe you need to work through those feelings and try to understand why you feel it is so wrong - and perhaps you will find the answer there....

You might want to consider talking to a counsellor about all of this? The fertility clinics all have them, and it might be a good way to explore your feelings in a neutral environment to see if that clarifies things at all for you. 

At the end of the day, the most important thing is that your child will be much loved and wanted, regardless of how they came into the world - that's the thought I hold on to when I'm wondering what on earth I'm doing trying for a child with anonymous donor sperm  

Wishing you much luck with your decision, let us know how you get on,
Laura
x


----------



## tillie

Hi, thanks for the welcome and for reading my LONG post!
Im so glad I found this site and to read that other people are also single and so much want to have a baby.  It just makes things a little easier to cope with.
Im in 2 minds whether having a baby with him is wrong as I know the baby will be loved so much by both of us so part of me feels that cant be wrong even though we wont be a couple.  The other part of me is selfish though and wants the baby all to myself and doesnt want any disagreements on up bringing etc.  
Using a donor does really appeal to me but even though I try to think positive Im worried how I would be if it fails.  Its hard enough now but I know I would have to draw the line at 2 attempts if I go for IVF which I feel would be better given my age and if I go that route I would have severed all ties with my ex so there would be no going back there for his help again.
Sorry if Im not making much sense but my head is all mixed up today.


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Tillie

I totally agree with Laura - you are the only one who can decide and you do seem to feel that you are going about something in the wrong way.  One thought I had is that could you have a chat with your ex to establish some rules about the upbringing and what happens after when you do conceive and give birth?  Maybe talking about it with him will help to clarify things for you and at least you'll both be clear about what you expect and what you're aiming for.

I'm not in the same position so I certainly wouldn't judge - I am using a known donor who will be involved to some degree after the birth(s) but he and I are quite clear that I will have the final say with the upbringing, although I have said he is welcome to offer advice (I did say that he shouldn't be offended if I don't always take it).

Ask your GP if she/he could arrange some counselling.  It's possible that they may be able to help.  Chatting to someone you don't know may help, as Laura suggests.

Hope you get things sorted.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Ju it is in the Zita West books and on the peer section has been discussed- it is after Egg collection with IVF, and I think it is to do with them making a transvaginal puncture so the risk of infection- the same goes for swimming. Also not sure about IUI and heat but apparently embryos don't like to be overheated.

My news from today is good, AF arrived early so started stimming on Fri and  I had a positive day today, if not exhausting and it is only 12ish-

My donor's partner took my morning bloods at 0730 and then I needed more bloods and  NK assay at 1100  and a scan and then to the GP. 
I had my day 5 scan (today is day 5 but only had 4 doses of stims) and my lining is 4 mm and I have 4 follies on the left and 1 on the right- which is fab for me! on the cycle that I got pregnant my lining was 2.9mm at this stage.  Lining is my main problem and then poor response to drugs. My donor is at the clinic doing a sample for the freezer in case things go pear shaped on EC day.

I think the luck of St Patrick is helping me and all of us along, all my Irish Catholic friends are lighting candles, giving me mass cards etc. So I think I'll be the only sober person in the Irish pub tonight and can drive my friends home- just hope that I am not asleep by 9 pm as I have been all this week- maybe a little nap is needed!! 
Take care 
L x


----------



## Roo67

JJ1 - fantastic news that things seem to moving along in the right direction and I am hoping and  that this is the one for you - keep us posted on how things are.

Tillie - Hello and welcome, as the others have said it is really your decision and you do seem to be in a bit of a quandry as to if you are doing the right thing etc. As Suzie and Laura suggest could you talk to him and see how he feels or talk to a counsellor who might help you sort things out in your head.
Good luck with the decision making.

I e-mailed a load of clinics yesterday to see if they treat single women, prices and waiting times etc so will keep you posted.

Roo xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Hi Tillie and Welcome to the madness of the single girls forum!  I agree with the other girls, counselling sounds a good stepping stone forward and laying down some ground rules with your ex. My ex did say that he'd help me, but I declined as I didn't want the constant tie to him (he didn't treat me very well, but was good with his children).  I must admit, I do like the thought of using a donor as they are so far, but so near when the child is old enough to seek if you know what I mean (I've imported sperm from Denmark).  Good luck, take care and remember we're hear to listen (read) to your concerns.  I have plenty of male influences around me to help with my child, and feel that environment suits me.  It is a very personal opinion though, what suits some doesn't' suit others.  Had I  a close male friend with whom I'd never had a sexual relationship with, that to me would be different again, as I wouldn't feel that emotional tie that you can feel (I certainly do) when having sex.  Take care and be strong x x

JJ1 - it's all systems go then! Fantastic news... Shame about being sober on St Patrick's day, butthis is a worth while cause! Take care x

Good luck with the clinics Roo, I remember emailing loads to start with, hardly any got back to me which was disappointing.  I hope things have improved.  I was so glad that my consultant was also a friend on my Doctors, so had complete faith in him, plus I felt he didn't judge me at all, which is what I was worried about.  Take care x x

Ju - I've read in my IVF pack, that it is due to possible infection, you can't swim after IVF either, which makes sense.  How are you? x

Suzie - hope you've got your feet up!  

Take care everyone, sorry if I've missed anyone out - am shattered and can hardly look at screen at the mo - thank god for spell check!

Take care
Rachel x x


----------



## anna the third

Emmalottie, try Norway - £1500 per cycle, or maybe South Africa - SAR 25,000 and at dr's discretion you can transfer more than 3 embryos (currently 16 SAR to one pound). this is useful for eg me, a lowish responder. Good luck, xxx


----------



## suzie.b

JJ1 - glad to hear things are going according to plan - looking good and I'm sending you loads of    although by the sound of it, you won't need it.

Rachel - I also read somewhere that having hot baths can affect the embryos after IVF because the blood moves to the surface of the skin and away from the womb area, taking nutrients away from it.  Sounds sensible in a way, so decided on lukewarm baths.  Not very pleasant but I haven't got a shower.  Dying for a red hot stinking bath but will be quite happy to forego that pleasure for the next nine months but only for a very special reason .

Roo - I think Hollysox used the Cromwell and someone else used JCUH - maybe that'd be too complicated though?

Hello to everyone else - all this progesterone is making me woolly headed - not much different from usual some might say .  Can't remember if I posted what I actually came on to post - oh, well, if I can't remember it, it must have been a lie .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Felix42

JJ1, great news about the lining and follies.  Wishing you lots of   for the journey ahead.

Welcome Tillie, that is a difficult one with your ex.  As the others say it's one of those things where there really is no right way to bring a baby into the world and the arrangement with your ex has a lot going for it given you both want the child and they would feel loved from the outset.  It clearly isn't feeling like the right way for you though at the moment, so I agree with the others that a counsellor might help you unpick that.  I rather suspect that a general counsellor rather than one attached to clinic might be cheaper and also whatever you say doesn't potentially end up affecting your future treatment if that's the way you decide to go.  Anyway, wishing you lots of   and   for coming to a decision and I look forward to getting to know you on here.

Suzie, I feel for you and the bath obsession.  I remember staring at my bath longingly during my 2WWs, having never hardly had a bath (I do have showers!!) for years.  It's definitely one of those wanting what you can't have, isn't it?  Wishing you another 9 months bath free! 

Roo, good luck with the clinic search.  In my experience most clinics aren't that good with email so it might be an idea to ring around and ask to speak to the nurses (as they tend to be like the customer services section!).

Dottie, how are you doing hun?  

Love and hugs to all, Felix xx


----------



## tillie

Thankyou all for replying, its so nice to know that Im not on my own and you understand the need and want for me to have a baby, friends are great but when they dont have that want themselves it difficut for them to understand.
Ive been looking into IVF/IUI at The Wessex today and will let you know what I decide.

Take care and good luck to you all

x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Hi Tillie welcome to the thread- what a dilema you are going through- if it was me, I personally wouldn't want to be tied to someone who wanted a child (co-parent) and you didn't want to be with, and it isn't as though there are not any other alternatives as the girls on her are evident of this!If you did want to use him as a sperm donor, without any of the rights of a father you could take him to the clinic as a known donor- clinics like the Bridge clinie will work with you on this for IUI ro IVF, they would freeze the sperm for 6 months before you could use it as that is a **** regulation.  I would also speak to a fertility counseller, ask the fertility clinic and see if you could have an appt (they may do a private one off for you) to help you explore the issues.

Well I had a lovely St Patricks Day,I got the call from the clinic to have 2 different injections asap. Then we headed out- my donor, his partner and a group of Irish friends in an Irish pub- me on my orange juice or lemonade- we had all our fancy dress regalia on- I came home by cab by 2300, listened to my ivf hospitable womb cd in bed and fell asleep, alarm set for midnight and 0600 for viagra suppositories.  My donor and his partner came home at some point later.

Then I had to inject cetrotide this morning and then have bloods done an hour after, so my donor's partner knocked on my bedroom door at 0745 with the injection ready, then he took my bloods an hour later and he offered to head off to the lab in town with them, but I took them instead. It is so much less stressful than going to the blood lab at 0730 and hanging around Harley St for hours.

My poor donor was nursing a hangover today! but we have some great photos and it is great to have a clear head!!.  My donors partner bought flower bulbs and has potted my window boxes for me.  The boys have headed off to town I declined as wanted a rest, I have acupuncture this afternoon so back down to Harley St, and to go to the clinic if they need me to collect more or different drugs - they give you all a luminous green mini back pack to carry drugs around in case they ring and say take it now !) and then I can call my donor's partner to meet me somewhere (last time we were jabbing in pub toilets and all over the place- if only people knew what was going on never in their wildest dreams who they have guessed!)

I am so tired but I am so pleased that I too holiday from work for these 2 weeks stimming. My GP agreed to sign me off for the 2ww and to prescribe gestone.

Roo- which clinics are you enquiring about, I found if they were UK clinics and they didn't have website a call was the quickest response- not sure about abroad, although when I emailed Barcelona IVI and IM they emailed back soon.

Dottie how is it going?

Hi to everyone else.

L x


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## Roo67

Oh JJ1 - I don't envy you its all go isn't it.

The clinics I e-mailed are all abroad, if i was to have treatment in the UK i would most probably use the hosp I work at, I couln't do with all the extra stress that comes with travelling all over the place for scans etc etc. I'm thinking of abroad because of the cost primarily, no decisions made as yet.

Roo xx


----------



## anna the third

Roo, i'd have a look at norway then - 1500 pounds per cycle or Sth Africa (15,000 to 25000 rand, currently 16 rand to the pound) where they can trasnfer more than 3 embryos. as you are the same age as me, perhaps that's of interest. it seems to me that if only 1/4 o my eggs is "good" then the more i transfer the better within reason of course). India same thing - pretty cheap and can be combined with a holiday. drugs also cheaper there.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Roo- I had acupuncture this afternoon and was chatting to Daniel (therapist) and he said that he has just treated 3 women in their 40's who had FSH's in the high 20's one was told she was post menopausal, all clinics refused these girls, he worked with them, got their FSH down, 2 of the women are pregnant now with IVF, and the other is on the 2ww- he said the woman who was told she was menopausal manage to produce 18 eggs, and 10 made it to balsts- much better than I could I ever dream of!! so don't give up hope. I would recommend finding a fertility specialist acupuncturist.His website is http://www.londonacupuncture.co.uk/ I know you are in the NE but if you found a therapist in fertility they may want to chat to him. I have a lot of faith in him.

I had to go back to the clinic this afternoon my donor came with me,we took the signed consent forms, and collected more drugs for this evening- becasue despite them saying that you are on one sort of drug and you buy it in, they docan and do chop and change them - at this rate I could be left with puregon!! an expensive waste at 360 pounds an ampoule! and having to buy merional. I have to inject two drugs this evening between 8-10 pm, then have another injection tomorrow at 0600 and bloods one hour after!

Hope you are all well
L x

/links


----------



## Roo67

Thanks for that JJ1 - I did have acupuncture last year when I started IUI, and she did specialise in fertility, I must dig out her number and give her a call.

Hope things continue to go well and you don't wast too much money on drugs.

Roo xx


----------



## kylecat

Just wanted to wish all you girls having IVF treatment the best of luck   

JJ1 - sounds like you've got a very hectic schedule ahead of you - I bet you are glad that you took the time off work! All the signs look good for you . I am hoping and praying that all will go to plan.  . I remember when my sister was having IVF at the ARGC - she had to virtually dedicate her whole life to them for two weeks! 

Dottie - how are your preparations going for your IVF cycle?  

Roo - lots of luck with your research - hope that you get some quick responses. Some of these clinics can be sooooo slow  

Suzie - how are you feeling? How long is it until test day? Hope you are still taking it easy. All my fingers are crossed for you  

GOOD LUCK GIRLS!

Katiexxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Hi Girls
Hope you have a good day

I had my early start  again, my donors partner and I were both nodding off on the sofa at 2130 last night.  I had my first injection of the day at 0600 and then he did my bloods at 0700, cab came to take us to the clinic and we were there before 0730 - and I was still 4 th in scanning queue- but all went well with the scan- my lining has a triple layer, good blood supply, is 5.5mm today (sometimes at the end of my cycle this is the best I have done!) and I am only on day 6, and my 5 follies are doing well- so have had breakfast of eggs to pack the protein in (had to eat a tin of salmon last night before getting into bed!!) and am wandering down Oxford St waiting for the shops to open and waiting for their call this afternoon.

Dottie how are you doing?

Have a good day girls.

Lx


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ1 Good news!  Not sure I could eat a tin of salmon before bed time - but needs must!
Take care enjoy the shopping and hope the call this afternoon is a positive one!
Rachel x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Have to admit, a tin of salmon before bedtime makes me feel a little queasy! But excellent news that it's all going so well JJ - fingers crossed it continues as smoothly for the rest of the month...

Laura
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

The salmon isn't a pre pregnancy quirk but the clinic ask us to pack in the protein up to 80 grams a day for enhancing egg quality (Zita west's nutritionist also talks about this), hence the litre of milk a day as well- a small tin of salmon/tuna is about 40 gms ! Believe me I don't enjoy it and I can barely fit in my clothes (not sure if it is the protein, fluids as well as the drugs).  

Just had my call from the clinic and I don't have to take my 2 injections until 9 pm, and then the next one at 0600 and bloods one hour later, and they said maybe another injection tomorrow morning.

My donor is coming to stay tonight as his partner has stayed with me since last week.

L x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

wow - you certainly are closely monitored JJ! I would have to take the whole time off as leave if I needed that sort of IVF - would never be able to juggle all those appts with work... Still hopefully it wont come to that and third IUI will work. No signs yet either way but it isnt even a week yet! Have a lovely evening with your donor, and enjoy the salmon! laura x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Laura good luck I always find the last week the most stressful of the 2ww.  I have taken 2 weeks AL to cope with this week. Tonight it is chicken for the second time in a day!!
L x


----------



## dottiep

Hi Everyone,

Not been around for a couple of days - combination of being knackered & a bit introverted at the moment.
Am on day 4 of injections - not sure if it's because the doses are much bigger but I've bruises all over my tummy this time?  Like you JJ, I can't get into my clothes.... combination of drugs, dietary changes & general comfort eating!  JJ - you make me feel guilty - I'm not monitored like you.  I am drinking loads of milk, more protein & fruit than usual & loads of water, but that's all.....is there other stuff I should do 
I had to go to the gym thismorning as I can't bear how much weight I've put on (hopefully will have to get used to this   )
Having another scan on friday....we'll see how many follies I have then.
JJ - I called your accupuncturist today so have an appt tomorrow - I've read loads of good stuff about improved IVF success rates with it.....here's hoping!

Hope everyone is well....no salmon for me at bedtime....just dreams of a chilled glass of Chablis..mmmmm..

Dx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

DottieP
Good Luck- Daniel is great I have a lot of faith in him and he did have 1500 babies last year.  
I have given up going to the gym last week - not that I was a fan- some of the books like Zita West say not to as exercise as it diverts the blood flow from the endometrium to the other organs, and not to in the 2ww. But that is my excuse!

Take care off to bed.
L x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

My donor's partner found this on the ARGC website links- but it is just the common sense stuff in patient info leaflets that most clinics give us. http://www.fertilityplus.org/faq/ivfhints.html

I am shattered had my bloods done this morning by him, he then took them down to the lab so I had a rest this morning and then went to hypnotherapy, she was telling me to buy something orange, I had a quick look in John Lewis and was so tired, so came home and went to bed for the afternoon, when I got up the clinic had called, and my donor's partner had gone down and collected my drugs for me. He is such a star I don't know what I would do without him. 2 more injections tonight and then tomorrow morning.

Dottie- how was acupuncture with Daniel? how is your cycle going?

l x

/links


----------



## suzie.b

JJ1 - I bought loads of orangey things - not totally orange as that was hard to find but I had a burnt orange top on when I went for transfer.  How about your fertilityfriends wristband?  I wore that too.  My sperm donor thought I was totally losing the plot when I insisted on sitting at the orange table and chairs (there were hundreds in all different colours and we had to push our way through with our huge cases ) in the airport on the way back from Prague.  He couldn't understand why orange was the colour of fertility.  Then, wonder of wonders, when I got my bag of drugs from the clinic, it was in a fluorescent orange zip up bag.  Ha!  That'll teach him to be sceptical .

Are you feeling tired because of the drugs or just because?

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## dottiep

Hi JJ,

I checked out the link you sent...a good excuse not to go to the gym anymore this weekend!  
Went for accupuncture tonight - didn't see daniel - I had a lady who was very nice.  Booked again for tuesday then she suggested pre & post egg transfer.  The statistics certainly sound very compelling - with what the total IVF costs, the extra is peanuts really!!
How are you  

Dx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Hi Suzie I will look for something orange- she said something like a scarf or pashmina. I am just tied I think from waking up every 6 hours for drugs of some sort but it must be cathcing as my donor is here tonight, and he's gone to bed already- his partner made us a lovely 3 course meal- he must wonder what is going on! He's cleaned the goldfish (something one of my friends gave me last cycle).
Must go donor's partner has gone my 2 injections drawn up.

Dottie Did you see Christina? she is lovely too. I do the pre and post ETI think they say it is best to have it 90 mins within ET and then afterwards, the clinic are well used to it and do a rota 7 days a week so there are always there for you.  It is called the German Protocol, if you search on here and the net it goes into it.

L x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I slept so much yesterday, I am knackered from doing nothing, my poor donor's partner I am no companyfor him, I went to bed all afternoon, then he'd made a 3 course meal for us and my donor was staying the night.My donor was tired too  and went to bed after dinner for a nap but at least he did get up after I had gone to bed. I thought they might go out for a drink etc.

I went to bed around 9pm and up at midnight and 0600 for drugs but slept again.  This morning he did my injection at 0600 and then an hour later took my bloods, my donor got up aorund 0700 and drove off home as is working the next 2 days.

My donor's partner then made us breakfast and took the vials of blood to the lab, collected the drugs for me, and has gone to meet his friend and buy his partner's Easter eggs.

I am shattered and have done nothing!! It is mad.

Dottie how did your scan go? Hope that your follies are growing well and the Easter bunny brings up many eggs.
L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ, I do  love reading your threads, it must make it such a special experience to have the support from not only your donor but his partner too - they sound perfect!
Take care and don't worry about sleeping - your body is doing an important job for you and needs its rest.
Take care
Rachel x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I just had my mid morning call from ARGC to inject cetrotide now, so I've done it on my own, I managed it on the 4th attempt to pierce the skin and it is the smallest and finest needle of them all there were tears and I had visions of having to get a cab with needle in hand to find my donor's partner, I'd just got out of the shower hair all wet and straggly like a mad woman -  but kept telling myself cetrotide doesn't hurt and my baby needs it (I have scoured my hospital to find a 27G needle that is an inch long to no avail but it comes prepacked in the cetrotide kit)- I'm such a coward.

My donors partner had gone out to visit his friend 20m mins away for brunch, and said to call him, but i kept thinking I could do it and it was unfair to disturb them, and then back on 450 puregon tonight (despite them selling him 4 amps of meronal this morning!), so cetrotide at 0630 in the morning and bloods again an hour later and she warned me probably more bloods in the afternoon tomorrow. I want a scan though to see how the lining is doing.

Well I can relax for another 6 hours!

L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Go you JJ!
Know how you felt when had to inject with clexane when I had my PE.  found a tip online and that was to put an ice pack on the area before injecting.  I sat there with mum for ages just letting needle bounce off tummy.  it wasn't until I heard dad coming in that I did it as he freaks at needles!

Well done you though!  That's a major achievement!
Take care
Rachel x


----------



## Tommie

Hi all,

  This is my first time to post here in this site. I thought this would  be the perfect place to share what I am going through right now. 
I am on DAY 12, waiting for the first egg aspiration for IVF tomorrow morning with a known donor.

I decided to use the clinic in Copenhagen as the country I live now has many restrictions as to how many eggs to be fertilized and implant, etc..  The total cost for 3 IVF with 2  freezing/implantation was around 5500 euro, plus of course I need to pay for all kinds of medications.  The clinic said they have lots of single women patients for artificial inseminations and also for IVF.

I finally decided to do IVF after a few years of undeciding period, still not sure what I am doing is right for me. But all I know is that I don't want to end my life without having my child.

as I have a tendency of PCOS, the docotr was very careful for giving me prescriptions for stimulation, and so far I am doing fine except my abdomen feels very tight and heavy. At DAY 11 my right ovary had 5 follicles X 15mm, 4 follicles X 16mm and my left had 7 follicles X 16 to 18mm.  I am crossing my fingers   a few of them will have a good quality.

I am wishing you the best of all to you and thanks for letting me share the moment here.  

Good luck!
Tommie


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Tommie
Welcome to the thread, and I really hope that your cycle goes well, you must nearly be ready to trigger! Are you in Denmark or Italy at the moment? Well done on you follies.

Best of Luck
L xx


----------



## Felix42

Good luck Tommie and welcome. It sounds like all is going really well for you. I wish you lots of luck! Those are very good rates aren't they? Presumably you are actually in Denmark now? 

Wishing you lots of  too JJ. Its sounds all rather hectic with your bloods, injections & diet etc. All worth it in the end though!

Good luck Dottie. Hope all is going well. Lots of  and ^fairy dust^  

Love and hugs, 

Felix xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Good luck Tommie - sounds like you've found a really good clinic in Denmark.  I've imported my sperm from Denmark as it is restricting in some clinics over here, plus the information I received from the clinic regarding the donor was fabulous.  
Good luck and all the best - which clinic are you using?
Kind regards,
Rachel


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Girls hope that you are having a nice weekend, I persuaded my donor's partner to go out last night to meet his work colleagues for a few drinks, as I felt so bad me half a asleep or in bed in the evenings - I was in bed 2200, up at midnight, and again by 0600 and then 0700 for injections and 0800 for bloods- I kept saying I hope that you are not hungover. as he was doing my bloods.

We went to the clinic this morning, then wandered around the west end for a bit, killing time as they said that I may be called back for more bloods in the afternoon - my donor's partner had a haircut and booked his spray tan for this afternoon, I had my nails done, we had lunch, then the nurse rang me and said that I need to take injections tonight at 2000, cetrotide at 0600 and then go to the clinic for an IVIG infusion and bloods at 0700 (dreading it, as my donor can't stay there with me as it is downstairs in the recovery area with the women, he'll put my cannula (although my donor is called cannula king as he can get a needle in the tiniest baby's with no veins, clapped out, when all the Drs and consultants fail) in for me before I go- then IVIG infusion takes 3-4 hours, and even worse costs around £2,400 a pop) then a scan afterwards, I never even asked her why, but I presume that my NK cells must be up from last week.

My donor is coming back tonight and we have a friend coming over for dinner tomorrow- my donor's partner used to be a chef before a nurse- so he is making roast turkey for us and then the 3 boys are going clubbing and to cabaret in the afternoon evening.

L x


----------



## Tommie

THANKS for warm messages !!   Today I have done my first egg aspiration at the clinic in Denmark (called Danish Fertility Clinic).
As I have a tendency of PCOS/OHSS, it took us such a long time to suck all the follicles and they extracted 15 eggs so far. I will find out on next Monday about the quality of embryos and whether I will be in a condition for implantation. After a half day from the aspiration, my stomach has already been getting bigger and I am so worried about if it gets worse. The nurse told me to drink 3L of water a day and avoid any carbohydrates and sweets (dark rye bread may be ok) and eat lots of good protein.

I totally got confused after the egg aspiration today whether I am doing a right thing or not. I know I want to be a mother but worring about a future/ beconing a single mom/ how to handle myself while pregnancy make me to stop thinking about wanting to be a mom sometimes. How are you guys coping with it? Or may be everyone here is so determined and does not even come across the thoughts I have in my mind? I am so scared now and feeling like postponing the implantation on Monday.... 

Sorry for writing so negative. I wish you all the best of luck.
Tommie


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Tommie, great to have you on board.  Just to set your mind at rest, if you were to read back a few months, you'd find several posts from women in the same frame of mind as you - wondering if they were doing the right thing.  We wouldn't be normal if we didn't wonder .  Great number of eggs, by the way.  Good luck with your embryos.   

JJ1, what a complicated treatment - I'd get confused and end up doing something wrong, I know.  Great that you have "the boys" to keep you on the (dare I say it?) straight  and narrow.  Still, you're well into it now, and I'm praying and hoping so much that everything runs smoothly.  If I get my BFP this month, I'll send you the information about the fertility spell I did - might as well cover all bases .

Hi, Rachel .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Hi Tommie, 

Congratulations on your 15 eggs - that's fantastic. I hope they all grow well over the weekend and you get lots of lovely embies. 

Your fears are quite natural, I'm sure we all feel a bit like that sometimes - I know I do. Plus it must be very hard to be away from home in a different country and going through all this on your own. Do you have someone with you in Denmark? Or some good friends or family you can call to talk to at least?

I'm having IUI at the moment, not IVF, but I've certainly had the same concerns. I'm halfway through my 2WW at the moment and today my 3 yr old niece and 1 yr old nephew were here with their parents (my sister and her husband) - and I found myself thinking how hard it is to have children - they demand so much attention, and how much harder to do it on your own....but I know those are just temporary fears...and once I have a child of my own, I'll manage - one way or another. 

Try not to be too scared - being a mother is what you want. And you won't be alone - you'll have friends and family, and other mothers around you to help. And you might not be single forever either - you never know when you are going to meet Mr Right...

Good luck for Monday, and stay positive   - you'll be OK...
Laura
x


----------



## Tommie

Thanks, Lauris, Suzie.b and all    I feel much better reading the messages.  I could be lucky to have 15 eggs for now but this is really because of my PCOS, so I really don't think all are that good..will see on Monday.

I met my donor the first time yesterday. We have exchanged many emails and chatted so many times over a year or so(just because I have not been able to decide to be a single mom). To me, he is ok as a donor and I have no complaints. However, after the egg aspiration, I suddenly felt so uncomfortable to make embryos with someone I really don't know and especially after he started to talk about how good his sperm quality is...I think he thought that's what I care the most, but I was more on a emotional side and did not talk about how many of sperm counts or how good, etc...  I guess I was too nervous.

So at the end, he was going to accompany me back to the hotel but I nicely turned down his offer and told him honestly that I was very confused about what I am doing. He said he understood but still tried to convince me not to postpone the implantation on Monday.  What he said was true if I think logically but then on the other hand, I did not really want someone I don't know to tell me what to do (woops, sounds hursh?? )  After coming back to the hotel, I got depressed about how I treated him but then I really don't know how to react to my donor (it is difficult to be a friend to understand each other after the first meeting).

Oh well, I've got a positive encouragement from you all  today, so at least I fell so much better now, THANKS again and have a nice Easter weekend!!


----------



## suzie.b

Tommie, don't be too hard on yourself - it's such an emotional thing and, after all, you only turned down his offer to walk you to the hotel.  Having a baby with somebody this way is not normally something a woman has to think about and it is huge.  One meeting is not much.  Maybe he felt nervous and the sperm count was something you both had of interest, so he felt safe talking about it?  I can't really say for sure, but he sounds nice.

Hope you feel a bit more decided one way or the other.  If you are still confused, you could always freeze your embryos and decide later - there's nothing to say you need to decide right now - it's too big a decision to rush.

love and hugs
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Tommie Congratulations on 15 eggs- wow. Do drink loads and loads of water, we are told to drink 3 L and a 1 L of milk when stimming, rest up hun.

I think it is only natural to wonder if we are doing the right thing when it is becoming a reality, have you had counselling or does your clinic have a counsellor whom you could see and work things through in your mind even at this late stage. How did you meet your donor? I have a known donor too, but he is a personal friend, but it is important for me to think that he is my donor, who may be the father of my child () and play a part in the child's life but that I will be a single mum. Take care

Laura- enjoy your weekend with your nephew and neice, hope the 2ww is going ok.

SuzieB - would be interested in your spell and hoping and praying you get your BFP
L x


----------



## Damelottie

Hello Tommie

Congratulations of EC and hope your poor tum feels better soon. Don't be harsh on yourself regarding your donor. This is all very emotional and there's a lot to think about. I too think its normal to have those kind of fears.

Emma x


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Lou - thought about you last night when I met up with Emma and Roo.  I test tomorrow - thought it'd be more appropriate with it being egg day - pagan day of fertility etc.  Just hope that it works.

Glad to hear that there are moments that make it all worthwhile amongst the day to day grind.  Let's face it, the day to day grind is always there but we don't always have someone who laughs when we tickle them .

lots of love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Girls

Just to let you know . . . 

I've got my BFP!

                    

I've been up since 5am when I needed to pee and once I'd tested and read the word "pregnant" on that stick, there was no way I was going back to sleep - not to mention that my (.)(.) are so so tender.  I had to wear a bra in bed.  Also had to let my sperm donor know and he is very very happy.  Not so happy about being woken up so early but what the hell?  It doesn't happen every day, does it? 

I did "know" inside from the first day of transfer that this was going to work and, as Cath (Charlotte's Web) says, I've just moved from one worry to another.

The fertility spell must have worked .  I've still got the little angel attached to my necklace.  The witch's name is Mia Angel and I got it from ebay.

And now I'm also wondering how many little growing embies I've got inside and what gender they are.  I've had a look on the websites to see what stage they're at and it's a wonderful thought - apparently, at this stage, the heart is already developing and is the size of a grain of salt .

And yes, Lou, it was ALL good thoughts .

lots of love
from a very very grateful  and awed
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ameliacooper

Suzie - am soooo excited for you

Take it easy now 
xxx


----------



## Roo67

Easter Sunday does'nt get better than this, you must be on


----------



## suzie.b

I'd be on  if I could actually believe it .  Going to change my ticker to an approximate date - it might help.


----------



## dottiep

SUZIE - THAT'S THE BEST, BEST, BEST, BEST NEWS!!!  I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT YOU ALL WEEKEND.
I'M SOOOOOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU - I'M TYPING WITH TEARS IN MY EYES!
CONGRATULATIONS HON.  LOOK AFTER YOURSELF.
MORE FROM ME LATER - I HAVE NEPHEWS STAYING SO AM ON AUNTIE DUTIES....

LOVE
DXX


----------



## Felix42

Wow Suzie, that's wonderful. Sooooo pleased for you! A very happy Easter indeed. 

  and lots of  for a snug, sticky & happy pregnancy ahead. 

Felix xx


----------



## Felix42

Completely agree Ju. I think we'll all remember this Easter Sunday as the day Suzie B got her   

F xx


----------



## Damelottie

Suzie


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Suzie - wonderful news. So very pleased for you....

Enjoy every minute of it!
Laura
x


----------



## kylecat

Wow Suzie - many many congratulations to you! I am over the moon for you  . You are our first BFP of 2008 and I think you have given me and many of the other girls hope that with determination and positive thinking we will get there in the end!   You take care of yourself, love and best wishes katiexxx


----------



## suzie.b

I'm still stunned but waiting impatiently for you all to join me.


----------



## Damelottie

Y'know - I've often imagined that feeling of being totally stunned!  

I think I'd have to go straight back to bed and get my head together for a few hours


----------



## suzie.b

I did try going back to bed - after all, it was only 5am - just couldn't sleep then started imaging egg and home made chips so had to get up to get something to eat.  Didn't, just wandered around in the garden in the snow, feeding masses of seeds to the birds and admiring the snowy landscape.  Kept trying to think of somebody who might be up at that time who I could call and came up empty-minded (nothing new there, then).  Then had my cereal (still dreaming of home made chips) and waited until you were all up .

Being in bed did nothing other than remind me how sore my (.)(.) were.

I've rubbed my bump for you all so that you can join me asap - I rubbed Ruby Tuesday's bump before I went to Reprofit and it worked, so you see girls, there's no escaping getting pg now .  Felt as though I ought to have that horrible laughter you get on horror films at the end of the last sentence, as it did sound more like a threat than a promise .

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Damelottie

. Like that evil laugh in the youtube babies vid!


----------



## suzie.b

Have you watched them yet?  Aren't they fantastic?  In fact, just need to watch the four laughing babies one now.


----------



## Damelottie

Yes we did.

Brilliant!


----------



## some1

Wow, congratulations Suzie !!!!!!!  I am so, so happy for you (and, as you have now broken the single ladies' jinx, I'm pretty happy for the rest of us too!!)

       

Some1
xxx


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Suzie congratulations hun, I am thrilled for you!! Wow, our first BFP of 2008!!

       

Take care xx


----------



## suzie.b

I've rubbed my magic bump for all of you, so loads more BFPs to follow .  Pregnancies are like buses - they also come in bunches.


----------



## dottiep

Hi all,

JJ - your regime sounds so difficult - I admire you!
I don't know whether it's the stimms but I have been absolutely shattered for the last week and my stomach is sooooo bloated I can't get my normal clothes on.  It's been getting me down a bit but I know it's all for a wonderful cause eventually!

Well I had my 8 day scan on friday and have lining of 8.9mm already so they were really pleased with that.  In total around 9/10 follicles looked like they were developing so have another scan ( and accupuncture) on tuesday so will know more then. Does anyone know what's 'normal' or how many they would hope to get?? Accupuncturist said quality more important that quantity....although I'd like to have as many as poss to choose from.  Scan dependent, I think EC on friday so only 5 days away..

Can I ask a question pls ladies...I am really undecided on how many embryos to put back (assuming I have loads of good ones to choose from...)...I think post 40 with own eggs the max they allow is 3 so not sure whether to go for the full monty or just two??  What have others done? / think you would do?  Am a bit scared of twins on my own although do think it would be great for him/her to have a sibling but bloody hard work! On the other hand if I only put back one or two & they don't take then maybe I'll wish I'd gone for more Am spending sleepless nights wondering about this already!!

Rachel - hope all goes well tomorrow
Laura - how're you doing hun??

Love to all

Dx


----------



## kylecat

Dottie - you have a very hard decision to make. It's hard to give advice beacause ultimately it's all down to you to decide. However, if it was me, then I would ask to have 3 embryos put back in as I think that this will give you a better chance of at least one developing. I think it would be extremely unlikely that you could conceive triplets but you never know!  

JJ1 - hope that todays medication and clinic visit went ok.   Please let us know how you got on. 

Suzie - bet you are still on cloud nine! I went to lunch at my parents today and told my mum about your BFP - she thinks its great and wishes you lots of luck!  

Katiexx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Suzie- Just logged on and saw your wonderful news  on your  - ablsolutely fantastic you so deserve it stay on the floating cloud hun!! . Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy. Do share your magic spell with us all !! How did your donor react? Do you have BHCG's monitored locally- at my clinic they ask us to have them every 48 hours until over 10,000 and then scans weekly.

Dottie you are doing so well- a great lining and number of follies. I asked if I could have 3 embryos put back at ARGC pleading that I was 6 months off 40, but HFEA flately refuse to allow them now- before it was up to the clinics. Triplets and Quads are very very rare. I would ask them or work out the stats, and discuss with the acupuncturists- the chances of us conceiving as we are older is much less and you are tripling your chances, but that if you do conceive the twin chance is about 4 fold I was told. Do LWC take you to blasts? Some people if they get to blasts opt for less as their chances are so much better- decision decision.

I had a hectic morning, up at 6, first injection of the morning then bloods an hourlater and cannula inserted by my donor at home, at the clinic for 7 am, then 24 gm of IVIG- over 3 hours, at ARGC you are parked in the recovery room and see all the pre and post op women coming and going, there was another lady having IVIG she was pregnant but BHCG not rising, but then she got good news half way through the infusion.

Lou- so nice to hear about Ellis's antics- you still are an inspiration to us!

I then had a scan and my lining is 7.01mm and a good layer (so I have got past the magical 7 mmm and follies ok- I asked about count but the Dr said he can't count the ones behind so number isn't important. He said I may trigger tomorrow or Tues (I think Tues and EC Thurs). Then he started me on clexane (yet another injection!!) and dexamethosome (steroid) and continue with cetrotide then and there, puregon 450 tonight and cetrotide and bloods in the morning and probably repeat in the afternoon.

My donor's partner met me at the clinic and we went to scanning together, he was all tanned and dressed up in is suit for Easter and then our friend came over- he made a lovely roast turkey and glazed ham dinner for us and easter cake, then we opened our Easter presents and eggs- my donor was then tired and has gone to bed for a few hours, the other two have gone out clubbing. I am knackered too, but I was awake half the night worrying about having a canula inserted! (such a baby you'd never believe I was a nurse- but I also hate inflicting pain as well).

Hope that you are all enjoying Easter Sunday 



L x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Dottie - I think I would go for 3 as well....chances of triplets must be pretty slim, and the more you put back, the higher your chances...besides I would personally quite like twins (although I'm sure if it happened I'd be terrified!) - I really don't want an only child and twins would get it all over with in one go   Not that I will have that option since I believe they will only let me have 2 put back...

JJ makes a wise suggestion to see whether you get blasts - and perhaps you could also see what quality the embies are and make a decision based a bit on that too? Hopefully the clinic can advise you on this...good luck for the rest of this week - am thinking of you  

JJ - fantastic news re your lining, and sounds like the clinic is really taking care of all everything - it sounds completely exhausting and all the injections must be very difficult as you don't like needles - but it will all be worth it in the end...

Suzie - hope you are enjoying your first day as a pregnant lady and have had lots of fun calling family and friends to break the happy news. Let's hope you are the first of many this year - would be lovely for us all to be meeting next year with a whole brood of little ones  

I'm all OK - half way through 2WW and no symptoms, but haven't had any for the last 2 either so not really expecting anything. Test date is next Sunday but will prob test Fri or Sat - if AF doesn't arrive by then (I've actually not got to test either time before as AF has arrived, so let's see). Keeping my fingers crossed that I'll be joining Suzie soon  

Hope you're all having a happy Easter!
Laura
x


----------



## Felix42

Dottie, I must admit I've been wondering about numbers. 

Personally I'd be tempted by the idea of putting 3 back to increase the chances. 

Wishing you lots of  for the week ahead. It sounds like its all going well, bloating a bit included. 

JJ, goodness that's a punishing schedule and on a Bank Holiday too. Wishing you lots of  for the days ahead. 

Laura, not long now to test day.  

Enjoy your day Suzie B. I bet you've been going through a whole range of emotions today!

My AF arrived yesterday & without TMI I hope it does seem a bit different than usual (bright red) so maybe the acupuncture is working it's wonders?

Chilly here on the canal still. Woke up to snow all around but it went quite quickly. 

Love and hugs to all,
F xx


----------



## dottiep

Hi Felix,

Brrrr....cold just thinking about you on the canal while I'm snug on the settee infront of the fire with central heating on full blast! Although having said that I've just seen a mouse scuttle across the kitchen floor so that ruins the image somewhat!  I'm trying to be brave by not thinking about it but will probably avoid the kitchen for the rest of the evening..

Enjoy your hols.  

PS - will you be rechecking your FSH this month??

Dx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Suzie!
That is brilliant news!  Go Suzie -go Suzie.  the first of many   for us all!
Take care, put your feet up and chill.  Am so excited for you!
 
Rachel x x 
 to all those coming up for their test date!
x x x


----------



## suzie.b

Dottie, if it was day three transfer, I think I'd have three. If it was day five blasts, I think I'd only have two. I'll have triplets if I have them, but I'd rather lower the odds against having them. I met somebody (over 40 and single) on a [address removed] thread who had two transferred and one split and she ended up having triplets. The main problem was the months of bed rest - no chance to prepare anything, and her parents had to look after her. The triplets looked gorgeous though. Hard to breastfeed, as we only have two breasts. It's such a hard decision but, as mine went to blast, I only had two transferred. Hope they've both taken but will find out when I find out. Dottie, your number of follies etc. is great. Good luck with it all and with however many you decide to transfer. It's so tricky to know what's best. If you decide not to transfer them all, can you freeze them? This can leave you a little safety net .

Rachel, I am wishing the rest of you BFPs as quickly as possible. I rubbed the magic baby bump today and sent the baby dust around so feel confident that a whole swathe of them will soon be appearing here .

Felix, the thought of not being inside, watching tv at the moment is too much to think about. My (.)(.) are really painful when it's cold at the moment - hoping this will wear off soon. Glad to hear acupuncture is having a positive effect on af - red is a good colour.

Laura - not long now, is it?          The second week is the worst. Really hoping that you will join me this time.

JJ1 - donor was really pleased - I made sure I told him first so I had to sit around from 5am until 9am to give him time to sort of wake up (well alright, I woke him up). He is thrilled. As for beta-hCG, haven't got any plans yet. Thought I'd ask my GP to do a couple of blood tests and see if they're doubling as planned. If they won't, I may have them done privately.

Whoops, must go - cooking dinner and I think it's ready now. Got to check it.

Hello to everyone else.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi girls

Just thought I'd add a link for the witch who did my fertility spell:

http://myworld.ebay.co.uk/mia-angel/

I was particularly interested in her when I found out about the angel part of her name - I love angels and angel is part of my email address so it seemed meant to be.

love
Suzie
xxxxx

/links


----------



## Betty-Boo

Thanks suzie - Have just bought one!  Every little bit helps!
Take care
Rachel x x


----------



## Felix42

Oo, thanks Suzie. Will try that too. 

F xx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Julia

There are three main embryo stages when doing IVF - three day is likely to be 8 cell embryo, four day is likely to be a morula (looks like a mulberry) and five days is likely to be a blastocyst (could be hatching). The embryos only start to get bigger when they reach blastocyst stage - before that, as the cells divide, they just get more smaller cells each time. The blastocyst is the strongest as it has already survived five days in what, for them, is a hostile environment - they're not meant to live in a petri dish. They are also at the stage when, once hatched, they are ready to implant. An embryo would normally be five days when it arrives in the uterus, so transferring a five day blast echoes the normal state of things. Also, as it is strong enough to get to this stage, it is more likely to implant. As they're more likely to implant, it affects the decision of how many to transfer at any one time.

Hope this helps. I understand it _quite_ well, so you can always ask me to try again if I've not explained it properly this time. 

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Great to see your ticker up Suzie!!! Enjoy spreading the good news and joy!!

I am surrounded by orange balloons and my donor and his partner had blown them all up in the living room and they are stuck to everything, so those orange spots are real- had a look at your spell but my tempramental computer them crashed!!

-I feel a bit rough this morning- wonder if it is the steroids /cleane I started yesterday or IVIG and beandryl,  bloated and just not right (maybe it is the easter eggs!!), plus the darn viagra pessaries are leaking like mad this a.m. even through the most super absorbant ST's (TMI sorry) a dreadful side efffect that I thought was pretty much controlled this time round.

Been up since 0600 for clexane and  cetrotide jabs, dex and viagra, and had one lot of bloods done that my donor's partner has done and taken down to the lab, will wait for the call from clinic to see what is happening for toady, they said yesterday I may be called back this pm for scan and bloods.  My donor has gone off to work in Brighton today back with us tomorrow night.

I hope I have EC on Thursday. In my mind it is Thurs.
Hope that you all have a good day.
L x


----------



## dottiep

JJ - thanks for clarifying that...i wasn't sure so had looked it up but was still a little confused!  You're a mine of information.

Suzie - great to see your ticker too (does that sound a bit rude??) - you say you are 5 weeks...is this because they count from your last period??

Tks
X


----------



## suzie.b

Dottie, fertilityfriends count it from egg collection day and gave me my due date so I just put the due date into the ticker machine, and hey presto.  Egg collection was five weeks ago today, which is the same as ovulation and they were also fertilised that day.  My boobs feel at a more advanced stage, and my stomach looks bigger than only five weeks.  I think they must have both implanted, then split, then split again - definitely feels like sextuplets   .

JJ1 - great about the orange balloons - I made sure I wore my fertilityfriends wristband all the time and I haven't taken it off yet.  I also wore orange for transfer and refused to sit at a table of any other colour than orange in the airport (there were tables of all colours).  My drugs were in a fluorescent orange bag.  Try again to see the spell lady - I do feel it made me more relaxed, if nothing else.  Sorry you're feeling rough.  But if you didn't feel rough last time, perhaps this time it's doing something and this will help it work.  Every sign, nice and not so nice, could be a positive sign.  I was worried about the bumpy coach - I think now that I noticed the bumps because of the weird feeling in my womb so think they'd already implanted.  The weird feeling hasn't gone away since.

Sending you both orange energy!

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

suzie my donor's partner and I just bought the spell so we'll see and hope she can share her magic

Just been to the clinic to have 300 Puregon now and another blood test and a scan (done by Mr T himself- the first time I have met the man) he didn't measure the lining wanted to check the layers on scan- and was happy with them. Then got home and got the blood results and a call to take another 150 of puregon- my 6th prick of the day and no more today!! I think I'll trigger tomorrow but I have to have a cetrotide in the morning and bloods afterwards and like today probably back in the afternoon for a reassessment!

My donor's partner has just made us lunch and now chilling watching TV- I love all the daytime things like 'come dine with me' etc

L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Well that's me back from the clinic in Glasgow.  Had my AMH and Ovarian reserve test plus TSH/T4 and testosterone.  Was good to see the scan, although my right ovary is a pain to locate.  Left side had a follice that was 17mm, am due on any day now, but it was still interesting to see.  
Now to wait on the results and forward them to my clinic in Glasgow!  all exciting stuff.
Looking forward to my charm arrive - am even thinking of acupuncture - just to fin one up here in Scotland now.  Anyone recommend any good sites?
Hope you've still got your feet up Suzie!  
Enjoy your lunch JJ and hope everythings going well with injections etc.
Take care everyone
Rachel x x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Rachel glad to hear all was ok with scan-how long do they take to get results back to you- hopefully the time will fly by and you will get started soon.

L x


----------



## kylecat

Hi Rachel - really glad that your clinic visit went well - hopefully your results will come through soon, then you'll be well on your way! I am coming up to scotland in 3/4 weeks to visit an old friend of mine. However, she lives in Edinburgh so it might be a bit far away to arrange a mini meet up!

JJ1 - the ARGC are certainly working you hard at the mo! It's a good job that you took two weeks off work! Hope that you soon know when EC is going to be - hopefully it will be on thurs as you initially thought.

Dottie - how are you? Is everything going to plan?

Suzie - how is the mum to be?!!! You better be taking it easy young lady!  

Love to all

Katiexx


----------



## dottiep

Rachel - glad all went well....good luck for the results.

Well, I have the stomach the size of a 4 month pregnant lady...sooooo bloated from all my stimms. (nothing at all to do with vast quantities of easter eggs!).  I have second scan tomorrow followed by accupuncture session. I assume they'll be able to confirm when EC will be.  I just hope all's going to plan in there. 

Suzie - has it sunk in yet??  When is your first scan?

Dx


----------



## Tommie

Hi girls,

  Wow, it seems there have been many messages since Saturday !  I was suffering from a pain after EC on Saturday
and have not been able to read all the recent messages, sorry. 

I just want to update my IVF treatment in Denmark so I feel I am not alone and also hopefully it might provide some info.
This morining, I walked to the clinic (30min) with a big pain in my stomach (did not know what it was, not around my ovaries)
almost looks like I'm 5 months pregnant. I was going to beg to postpone for implantation due to my bad condition. But the doctoor said my ovaries are both about 5mmX5mm and does not look like I have OHSS and what I am feeling is normal (is that right?).

and the result was: 15 eggs, 9 divided into cells since Saturday, 4 got small fragmentation ( to be frozen) and 1 without fragmentation for implantation

Only one was implanted in order to avoid the risk of OHSS once the pregnancy starts after 2 wks from now. I'm crossing my fingers that I won't be hodpitalized. Because I just cannot afford to take time off from work. 

The nice thing was that while the egg collection and implantation, they showed the whole procedures on the big flat screen so that I was able to see when the needle was about puncturing my ovary and follicles and the lab technitian was collecting my embryo to get ready for the implantation with a microscope. Is it the same as UK?  I was quite impressed about it. 

After the implantation, I was somehow able to make up my mind to accept whatever it happens.  I hope my data gives a good hope to everyone as I am 41 years old, have been having such a bad diet (such a sweet teeth!) and loves sports. 

Wishing all of us to be moms one day soon with a cute baby!!!( want a girl)

Tommie


----------



## Damelottie

Well done Tommi    

Good luck hunxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## dottiep

Hi Tommie & good luck for your first 2WW.  
I hope to have EC on friday so I know what you mean about having big stomach!!!  I think JJ will be having EC this week too so we're not too far behind you!
Keep us posted how you're feeling.
Take care
Dottie
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Tommi- well done and  for your 2ww.      
EC in the 2 UK clinics I have been at isn't as visual- at my first clinic I had general anaesthetics, and at my current clinic they do it under IV sedation- you are totally out of it.
At ET my first clinic did it under ultrasound and you got a picture of the embryos being put in, and my current clinic they don't put back under ultrasound so you don't have anything.

I can just about fit into my clothes but they are at bursting point! I'll be in mat clothes on the 2ww at this rate!!My boobs are also very tender today.
L x


----------



## Felix42

Good luck Tommie. Sounds like its all going well. How lovely to be able to see the EC & ET. What a nice idea. 

Sounds like the rest of us would be IVF-ers best start picking out our loosest clothing in readiness. 

 to Tommie, Dottie & JJ1.

F xx


----------



## Tommie

Thanks for warm messages, Felix42, JJ1, dottiep, Emmarottie !

It's just that I have such poor knowledge about IVF and related symptoms. On the day of EC, the nurse said my stomach would be
very much swallen for the next few days because ovaries are filled up with liquid. I have no idea why. It's just not a good feeling as I have not found out I am pregnant but my stomach looks so out of shape!   After 2 1/2 days since my EC, my stomach is getting bigger and so as the pain.  The only I know is that I had many follicles in my ovaries which caused my stomach swallen so badly...

dottie & JJ, good luck on EC ! 

Now I'm back to a normal mode, yes, there is nothing more wonderful than creating a little life on our own.

Good night
Tommie


----------



## Damelottie

Tommie - you probably know this but drink LOTS of water to help your ovaries drain hun. Its that fluid that can cause a LOT of pain and discomfort. You should drink at least 2 litres of water a day - if not 3.

I hope you're not too uncomfortable xxxxxx


----------



## Damelottie

Oh Gosh Lou - I remember those breathing problems you had now  .


----------



## suzie.b

Hi Girls

So that's two of you on the 2ww and two of you nearly there.  Good luck Laura with the rest of your 2ww - sometimes it's hard to stay positive as it's such a huge fall if we're wrong, isn't it?  Good luck Tommie.  Your clinic sound wonderful - any news about your donor?  I too saw my embies on the screen which was a wonderful and emotional moment.  Dottie and JJ1, I know what you mean about huge stomachs - mine isn't small to start with but seems to be getting bigger by the second.  Also, my bb's are so sore.  I tried to buy a bra today without underwire and it just fits me now - I'd bought one that I thought was two sizes bigger with a larger cup size   .

Also started with other side effects that Cath warned me about - very windy .  Went to Matalan today and they almost had to evacuate the store .  Just wanted to let you all know what you're in for soon   .

On that very attractive note I'll say goodnight 

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Congratulations Tommie - all the best - put your feet up and do NOTHING!
Take care x
All the best JJ1 for Thursday!
 Dottie

Katie - Edinburgh isn't too far away by train, Didi lives up this way too, so could always have a mini get together in Scotland when you're up?

Take care everyone - I'm so excited for everyone.... 
Rachel x x


----------



## winky77

oh wow.....so much news to catch up on!!  Suzie - I posted about your BFP on the other strand too......I am so so excited !!!  Permission to live vicariously through your pregnancy until I get my own, please !!  JJ/Dottie/Tommy - you guys are such an inspiration...particularly as fellow 40pluses!  Am keeping everything crossed! Dottie - I think I'd be the same as others have said - 3 back pre blast and 2 thereafter when chances are higher.  Like Ju and Laura and others, I secretly would love twins.....scared but would love it! 

Katie - would be great to see you when you come up to Scotland - I'm in Edinburgh lots with work and social stuff (and ski-man !) - when are you coming up?  Rachel and I have been talking about meeting up for a while ..it would be great for all three of us to get together!  

ok must get on with some work....been on here for 2 hours catching up! 
..dxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Well I have had a busy day and trigger tonight at 1945!!  I had cetrotide at 0600, bloods at 0700 and then acupuncture at 1300, ARGC called whilst I was in to do 100 Puregon and go for a scan, so my donor's partner gave it to me at ARGC in the bathroom, and then he took another blood test that they wanted. I had my scan and lining is >7mm now!! then I got a call to have another 50 IU of Puregon and to trigger tonight at 745, so I am first on the list and have to be at ARGC at 0645 on Thurs, my oestrodial was 8954 in the morning and 7763 in the afternoon, but this happened the other day on bd bloods and they said that they do fluctuate though towards.

So tomorrow is a injection and blood free day and a lie in, just dex tablet to take!! My donor is arriving tonight and my donor's partner has been an absolute star throughout all this.

L x


----------



## Roo67

Oh thats fab news JJ1, enjoy your lie in tomorrow and good luck for thursday, fingers crossed that this is your time and Suzie's   is just the first of many.

Make sure you have your spell with you and wear something orange  


Roo xxx


----------



## kylecat

JJ1 - glad to hear that it's all systems go for thursday! At least tommorrow you can have a nice relaxing day! Good advice from roo to wear something orange. I am going to get some orange knickers at the weekend ready for my second IUI next week!!  

Love 
katiexx


----------



## Felix42

Keeping everything crossed for you JJ. 

Enjoy your lie in!!

F xx


----------



## Tommie

Hi girls, 

  It seems I failed to post a message of this morning, so I try to write what I wrote this morning...

Lou - Yes, I will enjoy my PUPO period until I find out in 2w time. Also I'm afraid my OHSS gets worse towards 2ww because 
even now I am sufferering...how long did it take to get better from swallen/painful stomach in your case?

thanks didi and good luck, JJ1

Suzie - I found my donor online about a year ago and we kept asking questions each other. My wishful list for a donor was: putting his name as a fater on a baby's b-certificate, willing to do AIH/IVF, willing to travel, sincere and moderately intelligent.  I would like to keep in touch with him a bit from time to time for my baby.

Rachel - Thanks for your advice. Putting legs up actually feels very comfortable. dont know why..

Emma - thanks, I did try to drink lots of water today...hoping I would feel better. 

Wishing all of your dreams come true!!


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Well girls I am done and triggered, I don't have any orange knickers but my donor's partner had bought orange balloons and roses and they are stuck all over the living room (where we do the injections).

Tommie best of luck and think positively like you say PUPO!!

Roo - I bought the magic spell and she emailed to say she hopes I will have it by the weekend (ET) hopefully.

L x


----------



## dottiep

Suzie - I'm windy enough with the Puregon....good to know what we've got to look forward to!  Hope you are feeling fantastic!

JJ - fingers crossed all good for you for thursday - I just missed you at Accupuncture today - I was there at 1.40pm. I saw daniel today as Christina was off sick.  I'm a bit worried about getting appointments pre & post transfer as they seem to get quite booked up & I can't give them any times as yet.  I'm hoping they can be flexible.

Had scan again today - lining 9.9 so pleased with that. Total count was 20 follicles (no wonder I feel so uncomfortable & bloated!) - 3 of them probably too small to mature but more than I had thought. Am booked in for friday at 9.30am....scared now but have arranged for a friend to take me,collect me & stay overnight with me.  Will keep you posted...looks like JJ & I will be joining Tommie & Laura on 2WW...

Hi to all
Dx


----------



## suzie.b

Hi girls

Beginning to think 2ww was the easiest part .  Of course, I'm not really serious.  One miracle (well, the second one really ) is that, after at least two years of having no sense of smell following an operation, it has come back with a vengeance.  I just can't stick my head over the dishwasher even when the pots are clean, because the smell from the tablet makes my nose sore inside!  It does come in waves but at least it's not making me feel sick, or anything like that.  It's not very pleasant, but I'm really really grateful to be able to smell anything after so long, I could cry with joy.  Still finding it hard to believe so did another clearblue digital tonight, just so I could get to see the word again .  Isn't it the most beautiful word in the english language?  

Dottie - great news about your lining and the number of follies, even not counting the little immature ones.  It only takes one unless you're aiming for the world record, and I suspect you have more than enough and for a few in the freezer.  Good luck for Friday.  I'm sure it won't be half as scary as you're anticipating it - easy for me to say not having to look forward to it .  Hurry up and join me! 

Laura - you too.  Can't wait for you to get your news.  Feeling a little lonely here.

JJ1 - good luck for Thursday.  Sounds as if everything is going according to plan and that you'll soon be on the 2ww too.  Don't worry about the orange knickers - I did think about it, then thought well you have to take them off anyway - better to be wearing and orange top or bra or something.  Have you got your ff wristband?  If she's posted the spell, that means she's already done it so it's half way there already.  That means that you just have to do your bit (very short, simple and sweet) and you're all ready to go.  If you're allergic to metal and intend to wear the angel next to your skin, best to paint with clear nail varnish first.  I have a few bumps around my neck now but daren't take it off   .  And your donor and donor's partner are always stars .

Tommie - don't know how anyone can enjoy the 2ww - although saying that, I think I sort of enjoyed this last one.  The first one following IVF was a nightmare.  Hope yours is full of peace and relaxation - if you get that, it'll be a good 2ww.  Good luck with it - looking forward to hearing your results.  Your wish list for your donor sounds very sensible and, by the sounds of it, have been fulfilled .

Katie - just to mention what I said to JJ1 - don't forget to wear something else orange as well - you do have to take the knickers off .

Didi - yes, you can live vicariously thru my pg - only if you share the symptoms too    .  Really looking forward to someone joining me from the single women's threads.

Just to mention, if any of you other girls can get to the North East, we're thinking of having a single girls' meet, probably Harrogate or York.  No dates yet, but probably a weekend.  Let me know.

Hello to anyone I've forgotten - being pg hasn't made me lose brain cells yet - it's always been lacking a few    .

And HURRY UP AND JOIN ME!

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## dottiep

I'd love to join you Suzie! Will try my hardest..
I had thought about orange knickers but you're right...you take them off anyway!  With IVF, do you have to take everything off & put the funny gown on  Not sure what other orange things there are

Dx


----------



## suzie.b

Dottie, only took everything off from the waist down for embryo transfer, so made sure I wore a long jumper to preserve a bit of my modesty in front of my sperm donor.  They gave me a sheet to put over me.  I wore an orange top as I knew I'd be keeping it on.  I guess you could take an orange teddy with you.  I took my camera in with me to take photos of the embies on the screen.  Not sure I'd want to take photos of egg collection .  I'm not sure about egg collection - I guess JJ1 could answer that.

love
Suzie
xxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Morning ladies well I certainly hope we can boost the single's girls BFP rate now that Suzie has started us off! we have had a lull for a long time!!  and the IUI girls are to catch up as there is a lot of activity going on there at the moment too.

DottieP don't worry about Daniel not fitting you in pre and post ET- do you have his mobile no?(if not pm me and I'll give it to you) when you get your ET time for LWC just ring him and he sorts it out, if it is on a Sunday it is 150 pounds and 90 for the other days- they are well used to it he had 4 from ARGC that day and LWC is busy too. They have lots of therapist and do the on call on  rota- I've had Ingra, Christina and Danny Maxwell at other times- don't forget they can have 3 of us on the couch at the same time in different rooms

As for ET at both my clinics you strip naked and put on a theatre gown, hat, overshoes just like for any op. for ET at the Bridge you are just naked from waist down, at ARGC you are stripped of for theatre again as they do it in the theatre complex, my donors partner also comes in with me for ET and they have to wear a gown over the clothes, hat and shoes. We took photos of us in the theatre complex but they don't do them on screen, so just us dressed up.

L x


----------



## dottiep

Hi all,

Well, just done my trigger shot...an injection free day tomorrow....yippee!! A bit worried as when I took the needle out there was a tiny bit of blood....I get the impression this is VERY, VERY bad..is this true? Very worried now ...

JJ - tks for tip about acupuncture - I have Christina's mobile so will call when I know timings.  

Have just read first bit of Lou's diary about the EC - that's made me even more scared too...it sounds horrid!  And I can't even have a drink for dutch courage!!

Oh, goodness I sound like a big old wuss tonight - sorry!  Will get a grip..

Dx


----------



## Felix42

Good luck JJ1 for tomorrow & Dottie for Friday. 

Lots of  and  to you both. 

Dottie, remember you get semi-sedated for the EC so it should be fine. Keeping everything crossed!

F xx


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## dottiep

Thanks Lou - probably just feeling over emotional & a bit anxious!  Thanks for the reassurance.  Now I'm just worried about what kind of crap I'm going to come out with as so many people say they talk a load of rubbish!!!   
Just watched your video - it's fab. An amazing thing to show him ( & his girlfriends!) when he's older too.

Dx


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## Damelottie

Good luck Dottie   

I'm sure they've heard all kinds of ramblings before  . Whenever I have sedation or a GA, I tell everybody ALL my biggest secrets when I come round


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## Roo67

Good Luck JJ1​
Hope everything goes well and your boys look after you 

Roo xxx


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## suzie.b

Dotti - good luck with today, although I'm sure you won't need it.

           

love
Suzie
xxxxx


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## suitcase of dreams

Just wanted to wish JJ and Dottie all the best....   
Let us know how you get on today/tomorrow,
Laura
x


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## suzie.b

Whoops sorry, meant JJ1 - I knew one of you was today and the other tomorrow.

Good luck JJ1, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, although I know you won't need me to.

        

love
Suzie
xxxx


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## some1

Good luck for EC JJ1 and Dottie   .  I am really hoping that Suzie has started us on a roll of good luck so I am really excited for both of you!

some1

xx


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## ♥JJ1♥

Girls just back from EC I got 5 eggs, all went well- try and not worry Dottie it is all fine.  My donor put my cannula in for me, I went straight into theatre about 715 and was in recovery by 750. I don't remember anything until recovery  had a bag of IV saline, a few glasses of water and cup of tea and biscuits, then up changed and dressed and fine honestly. I was home by 0900 had breakfast and watching TV.
Take care thinking of you tomorrow and enjoy your drug free day
L X


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## suitcase of dreams

that's fantastic, well done JJ....have a restful day today and good luck with the eggs 'hatching' (I'm sure that's not the right word but you know what I mean  )
Laura
x


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## Damelottie

Well done JJ1

Gor everything crossed they 'do their thing' over night   

Dottie       

Suzie - are you in tonight for a chat?

xxx


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## Felix42

Well done JJ1. That's great news! Enjoy a restful day & here's to more good news when the wigglies go to work.  

Have a restful day Dottie. 

F xx


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## dottiep

Hi JJ,

Just a sneaky log on at work (don't normally as it's a bit public!) to say am thinking of you JJ.  glad you're back home ok - keeping evrything crossed for fertilisation overnight!
Take care of yourself
Dxxxxx


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## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks for your good wishes girls, it really helps me through this knowing that you are all there. My donor and I both had a snooze when we got home as the whole house was up from 0530. Then I got up and had lunch made for me and watching daytime TV. My donor's partner snaeked him some 'more appropriate literature' in his laptop case for the men's room as a helping hand - just hope he didn't leave in there for the next husband in!

The Valdimir embryologist has just called me to say he is about to ICSI my eggs- I hope he has a steady hand.

Started back on the steroids already, cyclogest starts tonight then twice a day, and clexane starts tomorrow- so jab free today. I have no pain as they give us voltoral suppositories but do say take paracetamol regularly for a day.  I have a tiny bit of bleeding but not much.
Take care
L x


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## kylecat

Hi girls!

JJ1 - just wanted to say congratulations for getting through the egg collection. Sounds like it went well and I bet you were really pleased to get 5 eggs. I am crossing my fingers that they are all fertilising as we speak in the lab!   . When do you think the ET will take place?

Dottie - just wanted to say lots and lots of luck for tommorrow - I hope all goes well and you get a nice little number of eggs!   Please let us all know how you get on. 

Tommie - hope you are feeling better now and the bloating has gone down,

Take care everyone
Katiexxx


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## ♥JJ1♥

Dottie   for tomorrow hope you get some nice eggs.

I think ET will be Sun (that would be day 3 as they class EC day as 0) and I have never made it to blasts before

Tommie hope that you are feeling more comfortable.  

I feel huge already not sure if this my donor's partner feeding me up- just had a 3 course meal, and we are still told to drink the 3 litres of water and milk, but also started on the cyclogest this evening (and that can be a bloating experience!), I am still to continue viarga until ET, dex and clexane and aspirin start tomorrow.

Have you used the calculator to work out if we are pregnant when the due date will be!!! I shouldn't tempt fate but a Xmas baby!


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## dottiep

Hi JJ,

Glad all ok - will you know tomorrow how many fertilised?? Not sure how long it takes?
And yes....I did try the calculator although felt guilty doing it....as you say, don't want to tempt fate...also checked what the due date would be if it was twins!! 
I am really nervous now although have a couple of friends staying over with me - will let you know how I get on tomorrow...

tommie - hope you're ok hun?

Dx


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## Felix42

Wishing you lots of  tomorrow Dottie. Will be thinking of you!

JJ1 hope that the ICSI went well and you get some great news on progress tomorrow. 

Tommie, hope you're feeling lots better too. 

F xx


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## Betty-Boo

All the best JJ and Dottie - it's all so exciting! I can't wait now..
Take care
Rachel x x


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