# Advice please! What type of treatment..



## DazeyJ (Dec 22, 2010)

Hi there, first time poster here!

Myself and my partner are lucky mums to our little girl of one and a half, my partner carried her and now we have decided to try for another in the new year and its my turn next  

I actually went through 3 rounds of IUI myself in the middle of my partners treatment all BFN's...I am now trying to decide what type of treatment to undergo..my partner in the end went the IVF route (which was pretty gruelling) and we have reserved stock with the same donor with which we have 3 chances with..obviously we are going to take the advice of the clinic but I like to do a bit of research before meeting them and making a decision......I have recently had scans and all looks good, awaiting bloods but don't think there are any problems, I am 35..

Anyway my question is why did you choose the type of treatment you underwent and would you have any advice for me? I have noticed that some of the same sex couple on here have gone straight to ivf, some have used clomid, some have done the ivf drugs without the egg collection/transfer part, I'm the same as anyone I suppose, want the best outcome but with the least amount of drugs! Would really appreciate your thoughts...


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## nismat (Mar 7, 2005)

If you've only got 3 vials of sibling sperm, and if you want to do your best to make sure that any baby you conceive is from the same donor, then I would say that hugely influences your decision. To be honest, if that is one of your highest priorities, then I'd just go straight to IVF. IVF isn't always gruelling; it varies not only from one woman to another as to how they react to the drugs, but also from one cycle to another. I've had a total of 3 rounds of IVF, and I really didn't find them at all bad in terms of the drugs. I got some headaches, and was probably a bit snappy, but I didn't have massive mood swings or anything. 

A lot also depends on your hormone results from your recent tests, in terms of what they say about your fertility - if there's any indication that your fertility is lower than average for your age, I would go in all guns blazing, as it were   

I know that the idea of taking fertility drugs can be quite difficult  to come to terms with (I was very against it when we started out!), but the basic fact is that you do have a greater chance of success with IVF, particularly with cumulative cycles, and with IUI often being charged at outrageously high rates these days, you have to look at the cost-benefit balance. I think it's a very tricky decision, and the idea of clinics pushing you straight to IVF if you have no known fertility issues is rather like using a hammer to crack an egg, but when the relative costs/chances are so disparate, I can see why a lot of people do make that decision   Also, given that you done 3 unsuccessful IUI cycles, I think that is probably yet another reason for looking at IVF as your first option. 

Hope that helps, even if it does sound rather like I'm being very one-sided! I'm actually quite ambivalent about IVF, but I think that in your particular circumstances, it's the option that makes sense for a lot of different reasons.


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## DazeyJ (Dec 22, 2010)

Thanks a million for your reply, I know you are probably right, I know not everyone has the horrendous time my partner had with ivf...can I ask you, I see from your signature you tried Clomid and medicated IUI's, do you think there is any point in these if you seem otherwise healthy fertility wise? As in Clomid seems to be to help people who don't ovulate and medicated IUI's seem to include all the risk re. the medication but just to leave out the last part (collection/transfer) which seemed the most straightforward part to me?! Am sorry you had unsuccessful IVF rounds, however easy they are for you with the drugs I think emotionally it really takes it out of you..


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## lmb15 (Jun 12, 2009)

mumtoaminx - Hi. I was one of those who went straight for IVF. Reason we  chose that route was because we wanted the most cost effective chance  of having a baby. I also egg shared, so the cost of IVF was actually  much less than the cost of an unmedicated IUI but 3-6 times more likely  to work. I found the whole process ok, except for the 2 week wait (hence  i was naughty and tested a week early!!  )
  I had no known problems and was 30 years old when i started treatment.
  Personally, i would go for IVF every time, as i think IUI is  outrageously expensive, and success rates are not particularly high.(in  fact, my partner will be starting her 1st cycle of IVF, using the same  donor i conceived with, this year. She, too, is egg sharing) I think if  you're wanting to get pregnant with the same sperm donor as your partner  did, then the case for going for IVF is even stronger, as that's the  way you're most likely to get pregnant, given you've had 3 failed IUIs.
  It's a very personal decision though. Just out of interest, would you consider egg sharing to cut the cost of IVF?
  
  Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.   
  
  Lisa x


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## nismat (Mar 7, 2005)

mum2aminx said:


> Thanks a million for your reply, I know you are probably right, I know not everyone has the horrendous time my partner had with ivf...can I ask you, I see from your signature *you tried Clomid and medicated IUI's, do you think there is any point in these if you seem otherwise healthy fertility wise?* As in Clomid seems to be to help people who don't ovulate and medicated IUI's seem to include all the risk re. the medication but just to leave out the last part (collection/transfer) which seemed the most straightforward part to me?! Am sorry you had unsuccessful IVF rounds, however easy they are for you with the drugs I think emotionally it really takes it out of you..


I just realised that I didn't reply to this part of your question. I have to say that personally, I don't think that there is an awful lot of point in medicated IUI cycles rather than just having natural cycles (although I do think it helps to have the natural cycles monitored with scans). If you have apparently normal fertility, the aim of drugs is primarily to encourage more than one egg to develop. If this doesn't happen (and it never did for me), then it's a waste of money without improving your chances, and you may also have to skip cycles e.g. if you develop cysts (as I did with Clomid). If you do get multiple follicles, then you may have to abandon the cycle entirely if you have too many, because of the risks of multiple pregnancy! So, IMO, I would recommend either natural IUI or going for full-on IVF. But that is based largely on my own poor response to drugs, which was probably due to the at-the-time-undiagnosed diminished ovarian reserve, so my ovaries weren't playing ball without the highest drugs dosage! Slightly biassed in other words


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## DazeyJ (Dec 22, 2010)

Thanks again for replies girls, I have my first appointment on the 17th and I like to be armed with as much information as possible beforehand! It'll be interesting to see what they recommend..

Lisa I think at 35 I am just over the age for egg sharing at LWC? I'm not sure how I think about egg sharing actually, always thought I'd be on for it but not so sure now..think it's a wonderful thing to do though and the cost difference is massive..I couldn't figure out from your ticker how old your baby is but is your partner excited about pregnancy/labour after seeing you give birth?! Have to say it took me a little while to recover from the experience enough to get started myself  Not sure I quite have the pain threshold my partner has!


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