# Anyone who has unexplained infertility but has found success?



## Sarah4Jut (Sep 3, 2007)

Hi - I've just gone through my first cycle of IVF/ICSI which produced a BFN. I didn't even need to test as I started bleeding on New Years Eve and wasn't due to test until the 4th Jan. Not a great start to 2008 is it?!! I have unexplained infertility....and have constantly tried different things to help me....lots of vitamins, no caffine or alcohol, acupuncture, hypnotheraphy to help me remain calm and positive....I could on, but it all seems in vain. 

I had a friend also going through IVF (she was 2 weeks ahead of me), and it was her first cycle...she got a BFP - she has PCOS. It's feels hard when someone has good news and you don't. 

I feel I'll never get pregnant and staying positive is just so hard. I have read and heard so many times over that you have to be positive if it's going to happen, but I find I get excited and positive in the run up to treatment, and then as soon as the I am on the 2ww, I start becoming negative because I am looking for signs of 'feeling different', but never feel any different than the many times before, so negativity sets in. 

I don't know anyone who has explained infertility but has had success through IVF  - is there any one who has achieved success that could give me some hope as I am worrying that because I have unexplained fertility I may never achieve success.

I am going to do another cycle...but we are privately funding all treatment so every time counts (more pressure!). I'm going to take a few months break first though. 
Some success stories may help me find some positivity again.
Sarahx


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## Ellie.st (Mar 11, 2005)

Dear Sarah
I'm so sorry to hear about your BFN.      We were unexplained too - and for 9.5 hard, hard years during which we did everything you've listed and more - so I know how frustrating it feels.        We had pretty much  given up all hope when our third IVF cycle worked (much to everybody's surprise, especially as I was 42 by then), and our beautiful wee girl has just had her first birthday.  

It sounds like you are doing all the right things, and it is worth bearing in mind that most people aren't successful on their first IVF attempt. If you responded well to the drugs on your first cycle, I would say that it is well worth trying again.  Do you have a follow-up appointment arranged at your clinic? I found it very helpful to ask the doctor to discuss each stage of the cycle with me, saying what they might do differently the next time. The only other thing I would suggest, if you haven't done so already, is to have the tests done which daisyg has listed on the Starting Out board (Investigations and Immunology) - I wasn't offered any of these until I asked for them after my second IVF cycle and, although in my case they didn't show anything up, I think they are well worth having as they might just show up something which could be treated. 

I know everyone says to keep positive but don't beat yourself up if you can't manage that - I'm personally not convinced that it makes that much of a difference as I was very negative during my third IVF cycle, especially during my 2ww.  The main thing, I think, is to give it your best shot.

A break is a good idea before your next cycle as it will give you a chance to build yourself up physically and mentally before trying again.  Although it probably doesn't feel like it, time is still on your side (especially compared to an old codger like me!!!).

Wishing you lots of luck and   for your next cycle.  Hang on in there - you never know what's round the corner.   

Ellie


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

Hiya hun, so sorry you got a BFN hun  i too have unexplained infertility and it's hard to deal with when there is nothing to fix isn't it 

why not join the unexplained ladies (we have had a few BFP on there) here's the link

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=119639.300

pam xx


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## Liss (Sep 7, 2007)

Hi Sarah

I just wanted to let you know that I am on the unexplained thread that Saphy has given you the link for and we have ladies on there who are PG right now!   So there is hope for us yet  

I know how hard a failed cycle is. We got our BFN from our 1st cycle of IVF in November.  It takes time to get over it hun.  Some people want to get back in the saddle right away whilst others need a bit more time and that's fine.  Everyone needs to deal with the loss and all they've been through in their own way.  The emotional investment you make in TX as well as physical is huge so be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up on the bad days.

I had to smile at your comments about being positive during TX but low at other times.  I'm just the same and you'd be in good company on the thread; I think its quite normal because of the excitement about the possibility of getting PG after years of disappointment.  

Has your Con recommended any further tests as a result of our TX and did you get any satisfying feedback as to whether they could draw any conclusions about what could be done differently next time?

Why don't you come and join us on the unexplained thread?  We are a friendly bunch and understand the frustrations of not knowing what you're dealing with and why it just aint happening.  And don't worry about what you say on the 'down' days.  We all have them and we'll be there to pick you up again and make you laugh.  Hope to see you there...

Lots of love and hugs,

Liss xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## bethan jane (Jan 2, 2007)

Hi Sarah

I feel for you.  I too started bleeding on 30th December when AF was due on 4th Jan.  I'm still very sad about it.  We havce follow up in Feb.  To answer your question, my friend (3 was unexplained and got a BFP on her first cycle of IVF after loads of IUI.  He's just turned one.  I found out today that she's 11 weeks pg- naturally!  Don't give up hope.  Hang in there.

Bethan xxx


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## MAL. (Mar 19, 2007)

Hi Sarah

I am "unexplained" and we have been ttc for a very long 9 and a half years, in that time I have tried everything to get a bfp, I never ever thought it could happen and I found out yesterday that me and DH got our ever first BFP. It is early days still but it is a mile stone to get this far.

Come and join us on the unexplained thread, they are a wonderful bunch.

Take care xxx


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## samper (Aug 16, 2006)

Hi Sarah

( Firstly big congrats to WTBAM- fantastic news, good luck with everything)

I am another unexplained girl, in the 4 years we were TTC, 1 friend who had only ever had 3 periods in her whole life and was told she would never conceive naturally got pregnant without even trying!, another friend with severe endo got pregnant in her 1st month of trying and her twin sister also with severe endo conceived naturally. 

It just didn't seem fair, to all intents and purposes there was 'nothing wrong with us'- we were fobbed off with clomid and platitudes of 'try and relax, it'll happen when you least expect it'. I also did everything including months of chinese herbs...Yuck!

After 1 go of IUI and 2 goes at IVF we are now 25 weeks pregnant- persevere stay positive and it can happen for you.

Good luck and all the best

Sam


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## Moshy29 (Aug 13, 2006)

Hi

I am sorry to hear of your BFN and really do know how it feels so sending you a   

I just wanted to add another success story...Like you unexplained and ttc for 4 long years, not as many as some I know but this journey is a long one no matter how long you have been trying.

We had our first cycle in Jan/Feb last year and I was so positive it was untrue, although I knew it was practically a 1 in 3 chance of success, I just assumed that as we were unexplained, it was so likely to work first time.  From a huge height I fell when I too started bleeding before test day, it almost makes it worse when you don't reach test day.  I went through a very depressed few months where I blamed myself and loathed myself and asked what I had done to deserve this when I have wanted to be a mother all my life but like to many, wanted to wait for the 'right' time when I could afford it and had the security of a strong relationship and a family home....just needed the family!

Our follow-up only really showed that many of our embryos had a large degree of fragmentation, but there is no difinitive answer as to why this happens.  Not that fragmentation can prevent an embie implanting but is does reduce the liklihood.  So for the first time in my life, I started to think about the fact that I may never have my own family or experience pregnancy....I knew I would experience motherhood as I would have taken the adoption path if we still had no success after 3/4 attempts.

We didn't talk about when we would next have tx for a couple of months.  I beat myself up, and then some more and during this time lots of other friends shared their 'happy' news, I felt so guilty not being able to feel happy for them.  I had 6 sessions of counselling, and used this time to get off my chest all the negative, bitter, sad, frustrated, angry, hateful feelings that had been building inside me for 3.5 years and wanted to mentally gt myself to a place where I was ready to try again.

I felt trapped in my job at the time so also decided to have something else to look forward to in the even that the TX didn't work, so I started to look for a new job too.  Having this distraction was great during the 2nd tx.

I started d/r end June and got my first ever BFP on 17th August last year, the happiest day of my life.

For my 2nd tx I followed the same protocol, the only thing that changed was that e/c was 2 days earlier (I do believe this made a difference, and they did mention that they 'coasted' me on the last cycle and that I could have been ready sooner!).

After embie tfr I did NOTHING for 4 days except relax, move around as little as possible, I also think this is a good thing.

During my 2ww I drank a small glass of Pineapple juice (not from concentrate) and ate 5 brazil nuts every day - thought to aid implantation.

We still had a lot of fragmentation but did have 2 distinctly better embies 2nd time around (am convinced this is because of the earlier e/c) and even got 1 grade A embie, that is now the baby in my tummy!

In hindsight, I think our 'unexplained' IF is related to fragmentation issues as this has been consistent over 2 cycles, but the IVF gave us selection which you don't get in a natural cycle.  Although I will not give up hope on a natural BFP 2nd time around!

Sorry for the mamouth post but don't give up, each cycle you and your consultants learn more about you and your partner which can help for the future.

Lastly, I am not sure if the time of year has anything to do with it but in August last year (tx in late June/July), there were sooo many BFP's that I thought I couldn't possibly get one too, but I did.  I came to the conclusion that many people are naturally happier and more positive in the summer.

Make sure you do some research before your follow up and ask all the questions you want to.

I hope my story gives you some hope!

Good luck for your second attempt, I hope it is a success.

Love, Moshy x x x


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## Moshy29 (Aug 13, 2006)

Sorry, one other quick question, I notice you had ICSI which they would normally only suggest if there was a know   problem?  If there isn't one (that you know of) I would ask more about this.

xxx


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## bodia (Apr 27, 2005)

Hi,

just wanted to add my 2penny's worth...I am "unexplained" and ttc for 5 years. Had 6 IUI's and 1 IVF - all BFN. Was lucky and blessed with a BFP on my second IVF cycle and am now 30 week pregnant!

I also tried everything...acupuncture / homeopathy / massage (still have these,) reflexology / healthy eating / no booze / no caffeine / organic food / regular exercise. On my 2nd cycle I thought it was all over as I only got 4 eggs and 3 embies....but like everyone says it only takes one (and a lot of luck!)

Hang in there, and good luck!

xxx


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## fiwi (Apr 18, 2005)

Hi Sarah,
Just want to wish you good luck. I was "unexplained" too (hence the huge gap between my 2 boys) but I got there in the end. I believe for me a lot of it was stress related, I used homeopathy which helped but what triggered it was changing job for one less stressful.
Unexplained might also mean there is nothing wrong with us but being over 30, it takes longer.  
Take care
x fiwi


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## Tinx (Sep 2, 2005)

Hi honey,

I too was/am unexplained, but after 7+ years of trying to concieve and doing EVERYTHING possible to get pregnant, and then some, I amazingly got pregnant with my 1st IVF cycle. I had been having lots of treatment prior to that, clomid, iui and all failed. I had just about given up hope and went through the IVF just as a means to an end really, the plan was to get it over and done with and then start the adoption process. Luckily the treatment worked and our miracle Willow is now our rapidly appoaching 7 months old princess. The years of ttc were utter hell and I always felt so lost and empty and I wanted to give up soooooo many times but i struggled on and it was so worth it. BUT I never know what made our mirace work. Maybe because I switched off as I hadnt expected the treatment to work? Maybe the years of no booze, healthy eating and manic accupuncture, reflexology and god only knows what paid off?? I still feel that everyone who is classed as unexplained is merely a case of "not-explained yet" there must be something but maybe the NHS is yet to invent the correct tests? Its so hard as we never have something to blame other than the fact that we are failing as women, or that is always how I felt. I just wanted to know why I wasnt able to concieve. i am sure I nearly went bonkers with all the stress of it. Its all so unfair.

All I can say is that give yourself a break, have some time out to celebrate you and your dp. Dont put all the blame on you, its the system not you that is at fault. I so hope that you become one of the lucky ones and that one day you are able to read a BFP and to celebrate to the max.

Take care hon, you and all the women in the same situation, try and hold on to some hope and peace. Fingers and everything always crossed.

Lots of happy wishes, Tinx xxxx


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