# 3rd attempt failed :(



## Josie1 (Sep 30, 2013)

My frosties have haven't made it, totally gutted  

I've had 2 fresh and 1 frozen, all been negative. 

I'm loosing all hope of it ever happening


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## Hopefulshell (Mar 14, 2013)

Hi Josie1

I'm very sorry about your bfn  
I too have had 2 fresh and 1 FET so sadly
know how awful you're feeling right now 

However please don't lose hope. If you've
managed to get frozen embryoes that is
a very positive indicator about their quality
which should give you hope should you decide
to go through tx again. 

After my follow up following my 3rd failure my
consultant is now introducing a different set 
of meds to my previous cycles in an attempt to
redress what may have gone wrong before! 

It's too raw right now but i'm sure when you are
ready for your follow up your dr will be able to 
change your next cycle to maximise your chances
of success too.

Take time to grieve, be kind to yourself and know
that you aren't alone 

X


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## Josie1 (Sep 30, 2013)

Thanks for replying hopefulshell, it's horrible isn't it?  

Thing is they keep saying they are top quality embryos so just wondering why it's not working. I'll arrange a review meeting before we go again. 

I'm not sure what else they can do though, I'm always responding well to medication, getting a good number of eggs and good quality. 

Have you ever heard of assisted hatching? Read before it's something they can offer on 3 failed attempts. 

I've got another attempt through the NHS still, maybe a few more if we get frosties again x


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## Jeco83 (Jul 26, 2014)

Just wanted to say I know how you are feeling, we have had one fresh cycle and one frozen cycle each time 2 great embryos were put back and still got a bfn. I really thought this would of worked for us as our problem appears to only be male factor so I really thought we would be a very simple case- how naive was I! 

Anyway sorry I'm not much help, just wanted to let you know I feel your pain and you are not alone. All my friends are either pregnant or  have babies at the moment and its very hard to stay positive when all I want to do is cry and shout why us! But I am really hopeful this is going to work and I have even got me and hubby on a gluten free and wheat free diet as I have heard a few success stories about that.  When it eventually does work I really feel we will be better parents because of our journey.

I think you just need to take time to grieve and build yourself back up before making your decision. Best of luck!


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## Hopefulshell (Mar 14, 2013)

Josie1 - Yes, I have heard of assisted hatching although this isn't something that has been offered to me (I'm not sure it's a procedure my clinic does?!) I notice you had a scratch previously. Have you ever had a hysteroscopy? This has been offered to me this time (alongside a scratch) just so they can get a closer look to see if there is anything untoward going on that they haven't picked up previously! Although it's a private procedure, I'm an NHS patient too so it is something we are able to pay extra for  Also, have you ever thought about any immune testing? There is lots of information on this site from ladies who have had immunes done after more than one failed tx. I've had some preliminary tests done by my GP which she was very willing to do such as full blood count, Thyroid etc. which is worthwhile if only to elimate any hidden issues. 

I'm also on a 'fertility' diet after seeing a fertility nutritionist a few months ago. Remains to be seen if the dietary changes we have made will make any difference but I feel healthier and DH has lost a few pounds so it's not doing us any harm! I too have cut out/down on gluten although my GP did question why I felt the need to do this if I'm not a celiac!! There is just so much conflicting info out there it's hard to know what to believe sometimes!! 

Jeco83 - sorry that you find yourself in this rubbish situation too  At least we aren't alone in our sufferings!!

Fingers crossed for a more positve outcome for us all next time  

x


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## Molly99 (Apr 16, 2012)

Sending you all lots of  , I'm so sorry x

We had two fresh & 1 FET failures too, each time we had the highest grade embryos.  It makes no sense does it, that's what hurts the most.  

That's it for me now, no more chances   but I am keeping everything crossed for you all x


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## Hbkmorris (Apr 7, 2010)

So sorry to read your news. It's totally heart breaking and turns your world upside down when you receive a BFN. 

As you can see I'm somewhat of a dab hand at it now.. 5 failures later and I'm still here trying. I too always have perfect embies, blasts all top grade and the consultants keep scratching their heads!. 

You are lucky to get NHS goes so you keep at it.. sometimes it is a numbers game. 

For me I've spent so much money (some £30,000) I've no idea how to move forward without robbing a bank.. if only ah! My only forward thought is I have finally had my left tube which was hydro removed along with a tennis ball cyst and lots of adhesions so I'm hoping and praying to go the removal of all will make all the difference. 

Keep strong and keep positive.. I've had a long break now so healed and ready to fight on.. This is has to be a good year as I turned 40!! xx


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## Sunny12 (Apr 30, 2012)

Hello,

I wanted to post to say don't give up hope!!  I am now nearly 9 weeks pregnant after my 5th cycle,  I have had some high grade embryo's put back previously with no whiff of a BFP, it just took all those goes for one to stick, it is juts the way the odds work some times, sucks but there is no reason to think it will never work (which is exactly what I had been thinking until it finally worked!!).

Good luck all and keep the faith cos you never know....... xxxxxxx


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## Josie1 (Sep 30, 2013)

Thanks so much for everyone's replies. I've never been offered any other procedures, I don't think they are 2 interested unless you've had 3 failed transfers. I opted for and paid for the scratch privately. 

One of my close friends is pregnant Jeco83 (she has a daughter already) didn't really want another child but was persuaded to an extent by her Husband. She honestly couldn't have cared less about another child. It makes you wonder if people realise how precious being pregnant actually is. 

Sunny12 that gives me great hope, thanks for replying. It's hard to get your head around why it works 1st time for some people and some people it can take a half dozen times, nature is a funny thing x


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## kk79 (Nov 11, 2013)

Hi Josie, it certainly sucks when it keeps going wrong for no reason, I hope one day we all get what we want...but until then, you've just got to keep trying if you can afford to £ and emotionally.

We're going for our consultation today following our third BFN (started in sept 13 too). One fresh, 2 frozen. scratch, no scratch, quad therapy, still no bfp. No fertility issues with me, just a very old vasectomy in the way so were on ICSI too.
I know the clinic will just say its nothing other than rotten luck and try again....I don't want to quit, but I don't want to go through the emotional turmoil again. The drugs turn me into an emotional f wit and you just feel so groggy and teary all the time. 

oh hum, will someone please just give me a baby


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