# 40s... the new 30s: the "one good egg" race...Part 3



## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

New home ladies 

   

     

   ​


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Just book marking!


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## pinkflowers (May 8, 2008)

Hi just bookmarking

xxxxx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi everyone!  

Clucky - how was your favourite uncle's party?  I hope you had a lovely break.   

Fee - how are you today?  I hope you're feeling a tiny bit better.  Lots of love to you and DH.          

Georgie - lovely to chat to you yesterday / today.  Enjoy your weekend with DH.  Glad you have got your follow up booked in.

Vicks - Glad to hear that you're feeling ok.  Can I ask, what's the difference between a beta level and hcg?  Or are they the same thing??      I'm sure you'll start getting some symptoms soon...      Have you booked a scan?

Lukey - really pleased to hear that you had an interesting time in Barcelona.        Did you manage to do any sightseeing while you were there?  On our first trip we were in and out less than 24 hours, but we did manage a very good lunch!

Hi Coco Ruby and Pinkflowers.    

AFM - My nerves of steel (    ) failed me and I did a test last night.  I thought that I was already obssessing, so testing early wouldn't make any difference...  Anyway - I got a BFP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I had a blood test today and it was confirmed with a level of 363.  Egg collection was on 26th and transfer on 28th, so I think its 14 days post transfer.  Am totally excited, relieved, grateful and now feeling quite exhausted.  I know its very early days, and we've had more pregnancies than babies, but I'll start worrying about all of that next week.  In the meantime -  eeeeekkkkkk eeeekkkkk.  

Love, Harris xxxxxxx


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## pinkflowers (May 8, 2008)

Harris

WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

Sooooooooo pleased for you, congratulations, darling!

Take it easy and rest up

lots of love pinkflowers xxxxxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

OMG Harris - that's just brilliant! I'm delighted for you. It sounds like a very decent HCG level too!  Has the bleeding stopped now? I hope you're back on your feet
Here's to a relaxed and happy pregnancy! It must be a nice feeling to have the same chances as a twenty something year old!

Fee - how are you bearing up? It is so hard. I hope you are starting to feel a little bit better    

Vicky - 4000! Wow - that's really high!    Have you been able to sort out your 6 week scan? Could be more than one in there!!

Georgie - how are things with you? Are you feeling less up and down now?    Hope things have settled down and you and DH are enjoying your time together. Looks like we could be cycle buddies in the new year! 

Lukey - of course we won't forget you! I think it's good to take a break sometimes - it gives your mind a change to quietly process information overload. Hope you are ok and enjoying your FF free time  

Coco - how are you? Did you ever manage to get your blood tests sorted out? 

Hi Pinkflowers!  

We've had our follow-up yesterday. We're going to have another try after Christmas and will probably also go on the waiting list at CRM.  DH isn't ready for DE and we just heard from a friend who got a BFP on the 5th attempt having given up all hope but cycled anyway as it was a free NHS go - she was very badly behaved during treatment, drinking and smoking even!! So I'm off to buy a few cigars!!!

Lots of love and   to everyone.
Clucky xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Well... what fantastic news Vicky and Harris.          

Harris - I am sooooo pleased for you love.... just goes to show, you can't be sure of anything until you do the pee test.  I am really exited for you and as Georgie says - you are leading the way for us.  363 sounds a great level.  I hope you and DH are out celebrating.  Don't forget Harris - your pregnancy odds are the same as your egg so no more talk about unsuccessful pregnancy outcomes.  

Vicky - another incredible one egg story.  Your hcg levels sound good to me, and although there is no definitive guide to meaning of hcg levels, I know from experience that higher levels have a tendency towards good outcomes.  I am praying for you that you have a text book pregnancy and look forward to hearing about a positive scan soon.  I was quite interested in your scenario - am I right in thinking that you had the best three put back last time with a BFN leaving your fourth for this time with a BFP?  or did I get that wrong?

Clucky - glad to hear you are giving it another go - you seem incredibly strong and whilst ever you are producing reasonable numbers, it is worth going for it.  someone said, at our age it takes between 5 and 9 cycles.  As for the cigars - have one for me will ya - I gave up the **** 7 years ago, and i wouldn't go back but I have yet to become an anti-smoker.

Lukey - good luck with your journey - I do understand about taking time out    

Georgie - how are you doing?  looking forward to ski-ing I hope... and plenty of rumpy pumpy after the apres ski.  Where are you going?  are you a good skier?



AFM - well, what a lovely bunch you are - your messages were really comforting and I want to thank you......I was so full of sorrow for the first few days that I couldn't post.  I think I must have known deep down, because i was really anxious when I got to the clinic.  I could see that there was no heartbeat but strangely it was nice to see something on screen - at least I knew it wasn't a phantom pregnancy.  I am feeling a bit better now - DH has been wonderful ... holding me tight and comforting me.  I hate to see the sadness in his eyes.  Although in a way I don't feel very hopeful, I am going to try again as soon as the Lister will let me.  I have heard it said that you are at your most fertile straight after a m/c, so logically that is the best thing I can do..  For next month we are going to xxxx like bunnies cos u never know.... 

I hope we can meet after the new year as I still really want to meet you all - sorry this one didn't work out.

HOpe you are all having a good weekend

Love Fee

xx


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## s1165 (Jan 2, 2009)

So sorry to hear your news Fee look after yourself and good for you for having a plan for next year.

Congrats to Harris and lots of luck.

Sally
x


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Hi All,

Harris-fantastic news! Now you can join me in the hell of waiting for the first scan!HCG and beta are the same thing.

Fee-I'm sorry, it must be so hard. I'm glad you're making plans to cycle hard and F*** like Bunnies in the mean time! You're right, it was best 3 put back the first time but they were only day 3, they left the fourth one growing and low and behold we got blasto-boy!

Clukey-Glad you and DH have decided to give it another go, you really never know and in the mean time you get to have a fab christmas!

Hi to everyone else!

AFM-finding the wait for the scan worse than the 2ww, suddenly got so much to lose. Very little in the way of symptoms but only 5weeks 2 days now. Finding it hard to relax, DHs mum is poorly and he is really upset, driving up and down to the hospital to see her, then stressing because i'm getting stressed!
Doing some acupuncture, planning on scan on 21stDec, and gonna do it in Manchester as will have left for my xmas hols

Love to all, Vicky


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## Guest (Dec 13, 2009)

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! OMG Harris that is so brilliant!!!! I am so thrilled for you......come on those little embies!!!! How bloomin' exciting!           

Will catch up more tomorrow but in the meantime special hugs to Fee     

xxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Congratulations Harris, what wonderful news!     I am so pleased for you, especially after you were so worried.  Well done! 

How are you Vicks, good idea about the acupuncture, if nothing else I hear it can help you keep calm  and helps with stress which is always good in the early days of preganancy I think!

Lukey, your trip to Spain sounds great, I think that's where I'll be headed if it comes to DE.  Do you have any idea when you might go over for treatment of are you still at the deciding stage? 

Fi, how are you hon?  I think another go straight away is a really good idea, if you feel up to it.  The Lister were happy for me to cycle straight away, even before my next period, after my miscarriage at 9 weeks so I am sure they will be happy for you to try again very quickly.

And am glad to hear you are having another go Clucky, I agree that it seems to make sense that generally speaking ladies of our age need a few tries to get out bfp!   

Hi Georgie, did you get those cigars in the end?!  Let's fact it, we will try anything won't we!  

Hi Pinkflowers and Sally 

As for me, I do seem to be seeing babies and toddlers everywhere at the moment, not sure why.  It does make me feel a bit sad, seeing people with their little ones in prams or toddling along.  I'm sure I'll be ok, it just seems a bit difficult at the moment  

xx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Just a quick one tonight .....

Coco - It is very difficult sometimes to see the world around us full of babies.    I don't know if this will help or if you will just think I am mad, but when I see a mum with a baby, I try to visualise myself in that situation.  Because as long as I/we are able to accept DE, we will all one day have a baby in our arms......  And you got so close coco (closer than me) - when will you try again?

Vicks - there is not alot that will comfort you through these next very difficult days.  You will worry because, as you say, you have something to lose now... But your hcg looks very good (which mine was not) and you haven't mentioned any 'worrying' symptoms (as described by coco),  and lastly, coco and I have done the 'bad stats' so it must time for the 'good stats'.  The scan should give you a good indication as to whether it is a goer or not..... look after yourself love....    

Sally - thanks .... what is your next step?

Harris - I am hoping that everything is going well.  I have some questions about IM - I am thinking of going just after new year if I can get an appointment? Can you give me any idea of cost? 

Lukey - thank you for thinking of me.... I hope that you are doing okay   

Fi
xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Evening All!

Thank you everyone for your special kind words and all the support you give me on here.  Being on this thread has def made the last five / six months much more pleasant and less stressful !!  You are such a lovely, fab bunch of ladies - thankyou!   

Fee - a special thanks to you with your tough week.  How are you feeling?        I'm sure that the Lister will let you cycle again really quickly if you want, although do get all your homones checked first.  Mine go bananas after a m/c and it always took them two cycles to fully settle.  I'm going to try to send you the IM info as an attachment to a pm.  If it doesn't work let me know your email address.  Are you and DH doing anything nice over Christmas?    

Clucky - I love the dancing display!!!  I'm so pleased that you're going to have another go in Jan.  You keep getting a reasonable number of eggs which is a good headstart!  Are they going to change anything next time?  Hey - the cigars could make all the difference......    

Vicks - how are you doing?  Try not to get too stressed if you can.  Its all so nerve wracking and I know what you mean about obssessing...        When is your scan booked for?  

Coco - hi there!  Sorry if I missed this, but did you get your tests sorted out?  It can be really tough when you seem to see babies everywhere.  I used to get all teary and very sentimental about it - Fee's idea sounds great..  You can and will get there - don't loose faith           

Georgie - how are you?  Did you have a good weekend with DH?  I hope you're enjoying the run up to Christmas.    

Hi Lukey - Thanks for your lovely message.  Lots of decisions for you...       

Hi Pinkflowers - not sure what treatment stage you're at?  

Hi to Sally and everyone else.  

Not much to report here.  No symptoms to report, so just trying to stay positive and calm.  Am going to book my scan tomorrow, but think it won't be until after Christmas which is a bit of shame.  Then again, no point having an early one and worrying about seeing a heart beat.  
Love, Harris xxxxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Damn - just lost a long post!

Morning all

Harris - you are so right about this thread really helping during all the horrible traumas that we all have to go through.   I hope you can relax a little bit and not worry too much about your scan - remember your chances must be better now than they have ever been!    Do you have a busy Christmas to distract you? I have found a good use for those pesky IVF syringes - the ones with the huge drawing up needles are excellent for injecting brandy into Christmas Cake!! 
Our next go will be more of the same - they don't have any tricks left up their sleeve but felt it was worth another go for as long as we are getting some decent looking embies. We did have a strange conversation about cat allergies - so now my DH wants us to hire a flat in London during our next cycle!

Coco - so sorry to hear you are having a difficult time    I love Fee's suggestion - it sends such a positive message to yourself. There were gazillions on little ones at my Uncle's birthday weekend - we just tried to enjoy their company as we don't get to spend time with children very often. I hope you start to feel more optimistic about your future soon - this is all just a delay - you will get there in the end.  

Vicky - PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA PMA!!!!
Sorry your DH's Mum is poorly. I'm glad you were able to sort out a scan over Christmas. No symptoms at this stage is very normal so I hope you can relax a bit before your scan date.      

Fee - it's so nice to see you back here     Your DH sounds lovely - these challenges can bring you closer together i think. You're a brave girl looking to the future already -I am glad you are planning to try again     

Hello to Lukey, Georgie, Sally and Pinkflowers     Hope you are all well

lots of love
Clucky xx


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## Guest (Dec 16, 2009)

Hi Ladies

This is hard one for me as I know we have have had mixed news on here lately.....sorry for being away but I was unsure what was really going on ..... Just when I had my DE plan all sorted, I amazingly have a BFP (bloods done yesterday to be sure and all good) - I am totally shocked and more than wary of what can happen at my age .

I am already praying that 2010 brings all of us the news we want so much   

xxx


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

OMG-thats fantastic! Was that a natural BFP then? It just shows you, fingers crossed-its hard aiting for the scan i have to say and if i thought we were all paranoid during the 2ww, it more than doubles after the BFP!
Well done Lukey!
Vicky


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hello!

Lukey - how totally wonderful and exciting!  I am over the moon for you                            .  How totally wonderful.  How are you feeling?  Did you have any symptoms / feelings?  Any crying at Christmas carols etc

Love and hugs to everyone.  Love, Harris xxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 16, 2009)

Thnx V and H - tis a bloomin' miracle that is for sure   ...and so unlikely to last the course but we'll give it a go


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

LUUUUUKEEEEY!!!!

          

That is the best news ever! What a great surprise - you know Mr Tarannissi told us loads of miracle stories last week - he said sometimes things just change for no known reason and you can just get the right combination of embryo and environment. I am praying this is your turn - anyway you're off to a brilliant start.

So much luck to all you scan ladies in waiting               

love Clucky
xxxxxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Omg lukkkeyyyy

I was so exited, I just rang Georgie.

Now..... I want to know the secret..spill the beans...

Did u do it in some kinky position?? Or did u stand on
you head afterwards

no seriously... I can't tell you how pleased I am for you

what was your hcg? Are u just four weeks?

Fee

xxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 17, 2009)

Thnx so much - esp Fee after all you have been through     .....I am convinced it was more down to closing a long-opened door; both mentally and emotionally and actually moving on (we'd really got our heads around DE and were feeling v excited tbh - thnx to the lovely people at IM and in the US  ) I also think total pure luck of (possibly?  ) the right egg and the right sperm in the cycle after a failed IVF when they do "say" you can get lucky (we did do a cheeky IUI to literally "pass the time" while we waited for DE but I really don't think it was the procedure IYSWIM as stats sooooooooooo low, esp in 40+ - more the right time and "lucky ingredients"....oh and me not stressing as I more or less forgot we'd done it?  ....)

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Again

Well, DH and I are ready with the Turkey baster now Lukey....       I am so thrilled for you Lukey - because my god, you have had a hard road ... I have my fingers, toes and everything else crossed that everything is going to be perfect for you    

Vicks - I don't know when you are leaving for up north but I hope that you too have the luck of the gods on your side and that you will have a smile as wide as the Mersey Tunnel on the 21st.

AFM - well I saw the lovely Rolf Harris who has recommended xxxx for England this next menstrual cycle.  I am going to try IVF again as soon as I bleed again - and if I don't bleed it is back on the pill.  We are going to try Gonal-F this time - it may or may not help - who knows.  I am getting more interested in DE - for the first time, I started to get exited when I thought about 70% odds and possibility of twins and probability of frozen eggs.  Oh to be young!  I asked him if my personal miscarriage rate is higher because i have had two - he said nooo - just unluck.

But my last word is                   

lukkkkeyyyyyyyyy yayyyyyyyyyy

Fee
xxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 18, 2009)

Fee - I am glad you are going to cycle again soon - I REALLY think it is the right thing to do......I can't imagine Rolf saying XXXX      .....I do think he is right re the "luck" - at our age we have a 1:2 chance of m/c even if we do get a BFP  ...but whilst there's a chance we'll take it right   - and you clearly can make babies, so go for it girl!!!! Thnx for the lovely words too   - a long, long way to go; I am v realistic about the chances of it lasting  

xxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Lukeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyy - congratulations!!!       that is fantastic news, I am sooo happy for you!  How many days are you, have you booked a scan yet?  How exciting  

Vicks, good luck for Monday, am sure you will see a lovely little heartbeat x

Hi Harris how are you feeling?

Hi Sally, pinkflowers, clucky, Georgie  

I am ok, still haven't been for bloods at hospital yet - mainly because I have been soooo busy but also slightly because I am a bit scared    but some of the good news on here does give me hope  
xx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi ladies,

I know we are all busy with Christmas preparations - where has the time gone and how can it only be two days to Christmas?!

I just wanted to pop on here and wish you all a fantastic Christmas - to you pregnant ladies: Harris, Vicks and Lukey, keep those little bubs warm and safe this Christmas season, take plenty of rest, mince pies and Christmas pudding (with no brandy, of course!) and   for a happy, successful New Year.

To Fi, Georgie, Clucky, pinkflowers and sally     wishing you all a lovely, peaceful Christmas and the strength and support to start again for 2010 -    that this is the successful year for ALL of us!

Thank you so much for your support this year, it has meant a lot to me and has really helped get me through some dark, difficult times.  You are all fantastic women!

Happy Christmas
xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi Everyone

Jut wanted to wish everyone a very happy Christmas.  I hope all you lovely ladies have a good time over Christmas and receive lots of nice pressies!  Sorry I haven't been on much, but we've been hectic with Chritmas plans and our DSS has been staying too.  I hope all our dreams come true in 2010.  

Love, Harris xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Dec 23, 2009)

All the best to a lovely bunch of girls    ...may all our dreams come in 2010      

xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hi all

I hope everyone is calm and relaxed and looking forward to Christmas!

Lukey, Harris and Vicky - I hope you are all doing well and keeping snuggled up in this freezing weather. Also, hoping you are not worrying too much about symptoms and scans. We'll be praying for 3 more lots of great news when you have those scans but in the meantime enjoy every moment!

Coco - you are so right about this thread pulling us through some rough moments this year. 

So, to everyone - hope you have a very Happy Christmas and may 2010 bring joy and fulfilled dreams to all.

love Clucky xxxxxxx

PS - you know how all our friends send Christmas cards with photos of their Children in Christmassy costumes? Well, my DH has rather sulkily suggested that we could send some cards with a photo of a test tube on them! Bah Humbug!!


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

HOpe you have had a good xmas and looking forward to a new year.

Clucky - hope you are doing well and I thought your DH suggestion was quite a funny one   

Vicky - I was wondering how you had got on - praying that all was okay - am really glad to see from your other posts that scan was good.  Hope you are feeling less anxious now.

Harris - is everything okay with you?  when is your scan?

Coco - how are you?  

Lukey - hope that the blood tests showed good levels of hcg - am not sure when you are due for a scan - guess it must be soon.  Hope everything is okay love.

Georgie - no doubt partying it up on the ward.... hopefully chat soon.

AFM - not alot new - being a miserable git and not wanting to socialise with people -  spotting on and off ... and I can't remember what Raef said about the pill - I assume you start on day one of cycle.  He says that there is no difference between number of eggs after the pill, but I am not convinced - why would people use flare cycles?  Anyway hoping that AF comes soon so that I can start next cycle.

Fee
xx


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Dear All, 
Happy New Year! wishing you all lots of BFPs, bumps and babies in 2010!
AFM-had an other scan back at CRGH on tuesday which was still fine, the blob is now 15mm but not looking much like a baby.heart beat still strong. Guess i won't relax more untill we get to 12 weeks and have a normal scan, fingers crossed. The truth is I probably won't relax at all, ever again!

Happy New year!
Vicky


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## Guest (Jan 3, 2010)

Happy New Year all!

Vicks - great news!  ..so pleased all is well 

Fee - go with what the lovely Raef says ....I am a Pill fan so am a bit biased   

All ok (I hope ) here   ....just waiting for Lister scan next week 

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi 

Just a quicky

Lukey - I am so pleased that things looking okay ..... I hope that everything will be okay at the scan.... If the blood results are still okay, it is a very good sign

I have everything crossed, and I have said a little prayer for you ......

xxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

p.s (carrying on from the PM)...i am doing a little prayer for you too..  lots and lots of luck at your scan.

hi to everyone else
luv hope
xx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hello, me again
sat in Lister waiting area.  Looks like I will be starting again today.  Thankfully no cysts leftover.  Am hoping no pill. 

Round four.... Bring it on!

Harris ... How are you love? Is everything okay? 

Vicky hope you are getting morning sickness (in the nicest possible way it is reassuring)

coco... How r u? Are u ready to start again?

Anyone up for a meet up in a couple of weeks?


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## Guest (Jan 4, 2010)

Good luck Fee!


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Hiya Ladies, anyone fancy a bit more team spirit? Here's the details 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=222922.msg3494680#msg3494680​


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## Guest (Jan 6, 2010)

Where are you all?...hope all is ok?  

Fee did you start? 
Harris/Vicks any news? 
Georgie and Coco....Happy New Year!

Just a quickie from me - had my scan today and saw one good heartbeat! too much for me tbh   and will just pray it grows  ..I know at my age and with my history it is touch and go but lovely to have got this far!   ....dated at 6 weeks 4 days which is a day behind the early positioning scan I had last week  ..so hard cos we don't know exactly when fert was   etc....but trying not too worry   ^pray

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Helllooooo

Looks like it is you and me at the mo lukey

I can't offer you guarentees Lukey, but it is fabbbbbullllllosssssoooo that you have a heartbeat              - seriously, once you get a heartbeat, your chances of m/c reduce quite a bit.  It appears as though that is the difficult bit for the embryo.  Most m/c show something untward at scan.  God, you must be petrified love... but this is very hopeful REALLY REALLY REALLY!!!!!

Me, well I got told off at the lovely lister for queue jumping.  They agreed to let me start without going on the pill, but the nurse was not happy      She asked me why i had brought myself to clinic on my day three and not done pill as prescribed.  Well, I told her that last time they were gonna do a flare without pill and I only went on it to collapse the cysts and that also, I had better response with flare.  Also, that I am 42 and 43 in august and i really haven't got much time left - she said same for most in waiting room.  Main problem seems to be that there is a backlog of women waiting to start and they are worried they won't have enough people resources for the egg collections etc.  

Was a little put out but to be honest, I wasted 5 months at ARGC through waiting two months for a follow-up and then having to take Humera.  Then the next cycle, I waited again for my period which was 10 weeks, so I feel I can't afford to sit back and let things happen to me.  I could have done four cycles last year instead of two.

where is everyoneeeeeeeee

Fee
xxx


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

I'm still here!!

Lukey-thats fab news, as Fee says seeing a heartbeat at 6weeks reduces the risk of miscarriage loads-are you on any additional meds at the mo or au naturel?

Fee-good on you-helps to be pushy sometimes, like you say, time is of the essence!

AFM-9weeks tomorrow-feel alright, quite a lot of queasiness and sore boobs, but otherwise fine. Got another scan next Tuesday and I suspect if everything is ok I'll be signed off from the clinic. Looking into where to get nuchal translucency scans done. Signed on at the Gp and have asked him to refer me to UCLH as thats where I work and will be easy to get to appointments etc.

Love to everyone elsem where ever you are!
Vicky


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## Guest (Jan 7, 2010)

Fee - waiting is sooooooo hard but a few weeks will not matter honestly   so are you on the Pill now? or started stims!?!  
Vicks....good to hear all is well ....hope you get the referral you want ...if you want the nuchal test done privately try The Birth Company or the Fetal Medicine Centre in Harley St ...btw I am on prog support/clex/asp and steroids  
Hope Harris is ok....  

xxx


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Me too, barr the steroids. getting well fed up of the pessaries!


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hello Ladies!!

Happy New Year to everyone.  Sorry I haven't been around much but have been struggling to make it over to the office and keeping dashing in, reading stuff and heading off again.  All is very well with me.  I had a scan last week and there was one strong heartbeat.  There was also a demised second sac, which was not unexpected as I'd been bleeding quite a lot.  I was delighted and incredibly relieved to see a heartbeat .        I'm still having some blood everyday (for the last 3 weeks) and am beginning to get used to it.  I just hope that its just going to be ok.  I'm back next Thursday and am looking forward to it already!  On a more positive note I have been feeling shattered and quite nauseous which is all to the good!  Everytime DS goes to sleep, I hit the sofa!

Fee - I'm going to reply to your note in a minute, but completely understand your frustration with the Lister.  I think the nurses sometimes forget how stressful all of this is and how the endless delays mean that every day makes a difference to how we feel.  As you say, you've got to make the most of your time.  I wasted 9 months waiting for my hormones to improve at the ARGC and it still makes me fizzz ..            Sometimes its good to stick a smile on your face and be a little pushy...  A friend is always quoting an old saying to me - "The squeaky wheel gets more oil"  Us Brits can be a little afraid to push ourselves forward or make a fuss.          What happens next?  I'm afraid I don't understand the flare protocol - do you go straight into stimulation?     


xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Part 2 ....


Lukey and Vicks - I'm so delighted about your scans.          That really is fantastic news, and although its early days do stay positive - one week at a time etc...          Vicks - I've just had a scan at UDS on Harley Street as they were recommended by Mr Rai (my miscarriage man).  They were very reasonable compared to other places I've been to and couldn't have been better.  My sonnographer was a very professional middle aged lady who spent ages explaining everything she saw....  They were are £40 cheaper than 92 Harley Street.  I'm going to have all my scans there from now on.  I went to the Birth Company last year and they were very good too, but a bit more pricey.  

A big hello  to everyone else!!!  Georgie - I wonder if you are knee deep with patients who have fallen over in the snow....  ??
Clucky - a big hug to you.  

Love, Harris xxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 7, 2010)

Great nes Harris! Well done - so sorry to read of he bleeding - hope it does not get you down   

OMG I forgot Clukcy!!! Hope all is ok?!

xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Happy New Year everyone!

We had a computer problem over the holidays so I now have a lovely new laptop here which DH wants to play with all the time of course! 

What a lot of fantastic news to start off 2010. We had quite a rough patch on here late last year and now look - three heartbeats!! I can't believe it!! I am sitting here with a huge grin on my face.

Lukey - I can't tell you how pleased I am for you.    You are right to keep aware of stats for our age group but it is truly amazing to have seen a heartbeat already. Do you mind me asking, is this the first time you have made it to this stage? Harris is right - one week at a time and enjoy every moment of it.

Vicks - it sounds like you are doing really well too. UCH  must be happy with everything if they are thinking of signing you off. Handy to be working near a hospital for the next 7 months!  

And Harris too! It sounds like you have all the right symptoms. It's funny to be glad about feeling shattered and nauseous! Do you have any further involvement with IM or do you have to make your own arrangements here?  

Fee - how exciting to be off again. You really don't hang around! I don't understand about the Lister saying you have queue jumped - did you push a few patients out of your way at reception, or what??   As you know, ARGC never use the pill so for the flare protocol you just start stimming straight away on day 2/3 - is that what's happened with you? Are you feeling good about this cycle?     

Hello Coco - hope you are well. 

Hi Georgie - hope you are off doing exciting things with DH!

I have no news really. Just waiting for next AF to hopefully start Round 7 later in January. (Lucky 7!!)  So desperately trying to beat the steroid and Christmas induced flolloppiness before then.

love Clucky xxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 7, 2010)

Come on Lucky 7!!!! this HAS to be the one Clucky!!!

No never EVER got that far - farthest I've dver got was a v feint line and an HCG of 27 that never rose after the next day ....tis unreal tbh    

xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Lukey - Eek! No wonder you are nervous. It's all looking very good so far though. I am just going to have to keep everything crossed for you for the next 8 months!!


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Welcome Moog ... don't lurk, come and play.  I was reading your profile, and I have to say that the outlook looks good for you.  You seem to produce plenty of eggs and usually tubal and male factor problems do well on IVF as it bypassess the underlying problem.

Clucky - hope you are revving up for the next cycles ...... you do seem to be getting closer.  You are right - it is good to see that the thread as a whole is seeing some ongoing pregnancies so I am ever hopeful.  New laptop huh... DH and I could never share - he hates the way I drop biscuit crumbs on the keyboard.  As for pushing in, well, yes - it was like supermarket sweep with me knocking all the patients to the floor, and then dashing into the first available scanning room, hopping on the chair with my legs akimbo.     .  I've got over it now ..... I can understand, but sometimes it is hard for those even involved in IVF how hard it is to be old AND a poor responder.

Lukey - I hope you are taking really good care of yourself and DH is doing everything whilst you put your feet up.  

Harris - omg, bloods every day - why so??  How exiting it must be...  All in all, what do you think of the clinic you went to?  did you have any frosties left over?

Vicks - the pessaries    I found it had a similar effect to a plate full of baked beans followed by a hot curry...  Should only be another three weeks now..  

AFM - well, day four showed, a largish, a medium and a tiddler.  I am a bit worried about the large one as this is 14mm already - i hope it doesn't scupper my chances of any more.  I am on gonal-f now... I don't expect the drug to make any difference.  Nothing short of a rocket or gunpowder would shove my ovaries into action.  Pray for me girls that I end up with two to put back    that's all I am asking - just a reasonable chance...

I am getting emotionally tired of this to be honest.  i know that many of you have had a longer journey with just as much if not more hurdles than me ... but I really am not sure how many more I can do...... how do you guys do it?

Still, am enjoying looking at the snow - it reminds me of being a child and sledging down great hills in yorkshire, never knowing if you were going to make it to the bottom in one piece.

Love to all, and morrrree pregannccccciesssss!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fee
xx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Hi everyone,

Sorry to have been so elusive over Christmas and New Year.  It has been a tad busy at work and at home and I have actually relished the time away from all treatment thoughts.  I have not had time away from thinking about all my friends on here though and am thrilled to hear all the good news.  

It is a new beginning for me as from tomorrow.  No wine, chocolate or lard: lots of exercise, water and green vegetables.  And more PMA!!  I have put on nearly a stone since DH returned and it needs to disappear fast   .

I am looking forward to chatting with you again and will promise to get on-line more regularly again.  Will send personals on next post. 

Lots of love to everyone and a big HAPPY NEW YEAR.  May all our dreams come true this year. 

Georgie xxx


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## Guest (Jan 11, 2010)

Hi Georgie - lovely to see you back and thnx for the PM  
Fee - I'm guessing you may be back in today? - if so - LOTS of luck for those follies!

xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hi everyone,

Fee - sounds like things are going pretty well given that your scan was only day 4. What did the scan lady say about your follies - were they concerned about one getting too far ahead of the rest? My DH always tells me there's nothing I can do so there's no point worrying about it - easy for him to say but it is true!!      for good news on your next scan - is it today? There aren't necessarily any prizes for carrying on with this malarkey indefinitely -it also takes a lot of courage to know when to stop and move. Of course that won't be relevant for you because this cycle WILL work! Come on PMA PMA PMA!!   

Georgie - so good to see you back here! 

Hi to everyone else - got to get the house tidied before the builders get here!

clucky xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Moog, guess what! I am in on Thursday too.  I have to be there at 7am - I will try to upload my picture again, so you can see me ... and say hi.
7 follicles is not as many as last time but it is good, and as I say, I think you have alot to be hopeful about.

AFM - well, only two follies  one at 18mm and the other at 14mm    and whether there is eggs in them is another matter.  We shall see.  As you say Clucky - there is absolutely  nothing I can do about it, so not really any point worrying.

Lukey - are you having another scan this week?  How are you feeling?

Clucky - you are brave ...having builders in. ..... how are you bearing up?    how many cycles will you wait before you start again.  Hopefully Lukeys golden egg will have spurred you on.

Georgie - we have talked - glad you and DH are getting along nicely and looking forward to your skiing.

NOt much more to say...

Fee
xx


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## Guest (Jan 12, 2010)

Fee - by Thurs they will prob be 17 and 21 or something so here's to hoping they have some good eggies in them     Yes another later this week    

Yes Moog - no more lurking!!! 

LOADS of luck to you both for your ECs!!!!       

Clucky/Harris/Coco/Vicks - how's things? 

Happy skiing Georgie!

xxx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi Ladies!

Lots of exciting things happening this week...      
Moog - welcome to the most lovely board.....  It sounds like your cycle is going really well - fingers crossed for Thursday...       
Fee - I really hope you get two wonderful, golden eggies on Thursday...  Sorry I haven't been online much - I can't believe how quickly your cycle has been going.  I really hope this is the cycle.            I'll be thinking of you both lots and hope you end up sharing a room.  
Lukey - good luck with your scan!!!  How terribly exciting!!  Is this your 6week one?  Please keep us posted.     
Clucky - good luck with your builders.  What are you having done?  Are they going to with you for months and months?  When is your next cycle??  
Hi to everyone else. xxx

AFM - I'm still having some bleeding each day, but my symptoms are strong and we're feeling positive.  That said, I have my 8 week scan tomorrow and I'm really looking forward to it.  On Thursday I'm seeing the doc again for a check.....  The snow is so beautiful and we've had such a lovely wekk!!  

Love, Harris xxxxx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Moog,  great to see you on this thread.  I had a few natters with you on your other thread a couple of months ago.  I am so pleased you have your EC on Thursday with Fee.  I hope you 2  get to meet up.  7 follies is fab.  I hope and pray for 7 class A eggies for you and they fertilise into little beauties.     to you and your hubby.

Fee - Great to chat as always.  You will get your eggs on Thursday.  I feel sure.  I am always here for you if you need.

Harris - Such wonderful news coming from your direction so far.  May the next 6-7 months go swimmingly.  You are so nearly out of the woods. (I know never completely, but you can at least relax a little).  I will ring you in a few days.  Heavy week at work this week but better after Monday.  Lots of love to you all.

Clucky - I hope the building is going well and taking your mind off all things IVF'ey.  So glad you are going for it again.  I start the pill next cycle too so we will be cycling again.  Hooray.  I am ready for this next one, having had time out so I hope that is a good omen.  Are you starting at the ARGC again?

Lukey -  what can I say.  Go baby Lukey   keep growing big and strong.  Your news is so fantastic so far and has given me (and I'm sure the others) such hope.  

Vicks - you must be 10 wks by now.  I am so happy for you that all is going well.  I hope the queasiness goes away soon.  

AFM - you are right.  A&E has been mad over the last month.  Everyone should wrap themselves up in cotton wool and not leave their front doors.  Mad mad mad people.  The whole of Salisbury is now broken and swathed in plaster of Paris.  Also... very strange how the staff say they cannot possibly get to work because of the snow and yet all the patients make it in just fine   .

Well, I saw Jaya Parikh today and had another lovely chat.  I will start the pill, as I said, at the end of this month and just hope and pray that 2010 will be our year. Watch this space.  In the meantime, DH and I have started another DIY project.  Our shower room this time.  I ripped the old shower out while he was away (professional replastering job required after that!!)  and now we are rebuilding the room ourselves in order to save money.  Luckily DH is a whizz at DIY.  I am becoming a dab hand with a drill now though.
We also have our skiing holiday on the 30th.  Alas no   though as I will have started the pill by then.  I guess I could remind myself of what it is like to have sex just for fun    .  What a novelty.

I must sign off now as it is past my bed time.  Speak to you all again soon.

Georgie xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Good Morning Ladies!   

Fee - two good sized follies will hopefully translate into two perfect eggs! Wishing you sooo  much luck for tomorrow       that you get two lovely embies this time. I will be thinking of you     

Welcome Moog!    It sounds like you are doing really well on this cycle - so hoping you will find that perfect egg this time round! Very best of luck for tomorrow     - wouldn't it be nice if you managed to meet Fee! I was told by the Lister nurses that the policy is for patients to share a room for EC, and especially as Fee has jumped the queue they're bound to be extra busy this week!!

Lukey - Everything crossed for your scan this week       . It must be more than six weeks by now, or do you not yet have a reliable date? Roll on 12 weeks! How are you feeling?

Harris - so sorry to hear about the continuous bleeding.    It must be quite wearing, but at least it sounds as though it is not a cause for concern at all. Hope today's scan shows a strong little embie tucked in safely.  

Vicks - did you have another scan this week too? How did it go? Have you been signed off from your IVF clinic? How are those symptoms? 

Georgie - I hope and pray that 2010 will be your year too! Your plan sounds great - i'm very jealous that you are managing to squeeze in a ski trip.    You're very brave with your DIY - I am not very practical but if I stand around for long enough with a drill in my hand looking like I might do some real damage, DH gets the hint and comes to help!

I should know by end of next week if ARGC will let me cycle this time or not. If my hormones are behaving then I expect it will be the follicular protocol. same as last time - so down reg for 10 days or so then stimms, so EC around mid Feb. As for the builders on Monday, I was waiting for the builder who did the last lot of work to come and finish a few minor but irksome things that have been waiting for months. I bumped into him in Tesco last week and nagged him into coming back to finish the job but, can you believe it - he didn't even show up!! I am also planning a new extension and we are just trying to decide whether we need an extra bedroom, which rather depends on this old game!!


love to all and special luck for Fee and Moog tomorrow       
clucky
xxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 13, 2010)

Ooooooooooo Georgie/Clucky - I can't wait til you get going again! Hope it's soon!
Georgie - enjoy the slopes!  
Fee and Mooooog - soooooooooo much luck for tomorrow!!!   
Harris - I am a tad confused  I'm sure you are a week ahead of me? When was the EC in Spain as you go by that for dates no? Hope it was good news!!!

Had another scan too today too.....they say all is fine but I still measure a few days behind what we estimated my dates to be (ie they say 7+4 c/w an estimated 8 weeks) but then we do not know when ov/fert was at all!.....so we will see.....guess I just have to think positive and hope...but I know the next 2 weeks are crucial being an oldie    

xxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi all,

Just a quick note from me.  I just wanted to wish Fi and Moog the best of luck tomorrow for egg collection.  I am sure you will both get fantastic grade A baby-making eggs    

Georgie, glad to hear you are having another go and good luck with the DIY.  My DH is good with DIY too but soooo slooow, drives me bonkers 

Clucky, best of luck with ARGC, am sure they will let you cycle.  If not, will you try the Lister?

Harris, everything seems to be going really well for you, which is lovely.

Vicks, how are you doing.  Am pleased things are going so well 

As for me, have been quite quiet lately, I have been reading but can't help feeling a bit negative.  Money is a worry and I keep thinking that I have left it too late, at 42 (43 very soon).  I know there have been successes here, which is lovely and does give me hope, but I also think that the odds of me getting pregnant must be low... 

Sorry for being a misery and going on.  I am going to try to take hope from how positive and strong you all are and how much support you have been and are 
xx


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## Guest (Jan 14, 2010)

Coco    it is so hard to be positive when it seems all is all against us, I so know how you feel.....BUT I do think you have a good chance of getting pregnant - you have done before and that v impt thing ....I think the concern at 40+ is keeping the baby (chromosomes etc) but then if we don't try then we don't know    .....the new year can seem so daunting.....do you have plans for starting?

xxx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi Everyone!!

Coco - I'm so sorry to read that you're feeling a bit flat.        This fertility stuff can be so depressing and draining....  As Lukey says, you have a good chance, but I do understand how overwhelming it all can be at times.  Its so expensive too!  We have stopped adding up how much we have spent. I used to have a spreadsheet (I love a good spreadsheet) but it was just too difficult to look at....  Have you got a plan at the moment?  What are you planning next?          

Fee / Moog - fingers crossed that all went well this morning.....        I wonder if you managed to meet up with each other?  I've been thinking about you both all morning and really hope you both get good news.   

Lukey - so pleased that you've had a good scan!        They probably won't give you an accurate date until week 12...  Make sure you keep your feet up (and warm) and get plenty of rest....     

Clucky - I hope you get a good news call from the ARGC!  Are you back tomorrow for more bloods, or is today the day  I really hope you manage to cycle this month...            We have a joiner who keeps promising to come and do some bits and pieces....


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Me again... Part 2...

Georgie - You really made me laugh with your 'sex for fun' idea!!  I hope you're coping with the latest snowfall ok!  

AFM - I had another scan yesterday and am 8w7d today.  Everything is looking good and its a relief to be past the 8 week stage....       I saw Mr Rai again today and that was reassuring too.  I feel very fortunate to get this far....  

Love to everyone, Harris xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 14, 2010)

Good news Harris! Dr Rai is St Marys right? You are just over a week ahead of me 

Hope our 2 little egg machines are ok   

xxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Wow Moog - 9 is fantastic! You must be very happy with that           for some lab romance tonight and      you get great news in tomorrow's call.

Fee - I'm desperately hoping you got a good result today too.     

Coco -     so sorry to read that you are feeling fed up. Age is so depressing when you look at statistics but you have already had some encouraging signs and in my humble and very inexpert opinion your chances seem better than many women in your age group - there's still the chromosomal issue Lukey mentioned but at least you have shown you can become pregnant. Maybe you would feel better if you had a long term plan. It might help to work out realistically what you can/can't afford to do and what you are/aren't prepared to do and see what options you may have (x no of cycles with own eggs/maybe x no of cycles with donor eggs etc). 

Lukey - so far so good then!   I'm amazed that they can date so accurately from a scan. I would have thought a few days leeway either way would be normal. I'll bet you can't wait to get through the next few weeks. When is the next scan scheduled?

Harris - so pleased to hear about your great scan news too.   Hope the bleeding has stopped now. I haven't been in for blood tests yet - waiting for next AF (next week maybe!) then off we go again!

Vicks - hope all is well with you too   

Hello Georgie!

lots of love to all
clucky
xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Thank you all for your kind thoughts - it is sooo nice to read

Coco - been thinking about you alot.  Am I right in thinking that you got three eggs last time?  If so, here are my thoughts for what it is worth.  My god this road is hard - as I think Clucky, or was it Lukey? put it "it's hard been a poor responder".  But, you DID get pregnant and that is the best indicator of being pregnant in the future.  Yes, the odds are low, but money permitting, I think think the most important thing (well for me, anyhow) is to not have regrets when you looked back.  I have gone from 7 to one egg in 12 months, so I urge you Coco to progress quickly if your emotions and money allow.  I hope my thoughts do not come across as insensitive, I really know how you feel love, I am facing the same dilemma but now with only one egg.

Moog - woooowwwwww - you lucky lucky thing.  Sounds very promising - I hope you get enough to go to blast.  I looked out for you (well listened for Dan word but no avail.  they put me with another poor responder which was kinda nice.

Harris - yahooooo!!! fabuloso news.  I bet it is a relief for you too.  Has the bleeding stopped?

Clucky - maybe silly question, but why do they down reg you?  why dont' they do a flare and try to get even more eggs out of the egg making machine?

Lukey - you are in my thoughts ...

Georgie - lovely to hear from you today.      

AFM - well, mixed news... Definitely one, with one dodgy? (doc said somthing like egg, but nothing in it??) so I am resigned to one again.  However, I am hugely relieved, as you might imagine.  Now I have the nail-biting "will it fertilise"?  but I am taking the clucky approach "nothing I can do about it, if it doesn't" .  Will review situation if and when.

Now for the good bit of news, DH had 95% abnormal forms two years ago.  In October, the sample came out at 87%.  This time 72% which is only just outside normal forms.  The only change was  that he had made a concerted effort to eat loads of tomatoes (for the anti-oxident) and ate lots of nuts (contains celium) at xmas.  Soooo, this may mean that I have a chance of a natural pregnancy or perhaps we stand a chance with IUI.  I know i will have to ask Raef, but given that i only make one egg, it may be the best way forward??  any thoughts?

Love to all

Fiona


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Well done chickidees.  Good result at the Lister today.  Fee 1 good one IS a good result.  Of course more would be great but you can do it with one.  You did before.     for some serious romance in the lab tonight for you and Moog.

Coco - 2010 is a new year.  I so know how you feel.  Another year of bloody treatment and worry and being used as a pin cushion.  But hey... it may just be your year.  Fee is right.  As soon as you start again (and I hope you are able) you will find a renewed positivity and if you try another cycle, it may just work.  Having a next plan is the only thing that keeps me going.  What do you think you might do?  Is there anything I can do to help?  Stupid question, I know, but you never know.  It may be just a chat.  Keep your pecker up.  Your strength is sure to return soon.

Great news on your scans Harris and Lukey.  Keep up the good work.

Love to everyone else.  

G x


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## Guest (Jan 15, 2010)

Lovely words Georgie   
Wooohooooooo!  - well done both Moog and Fee! - and lots of luck for today and the fert news!   
Fee - good news on the sperm too ......I agree with Clucky that a long term plan is best (cos we don't want to be too old as mummys do we - however we get there ) but yes I'm sure these new results will help with ttc!
Coco -  
Clucky - what do you think your time-frame may be then? Can't see why they would not let you cycle soon - it went quite well last time right?  

xxx

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Just a quicky..

REasonable news today.  One too immature to fertilise and one fertilised.  I think this is quite hopeful.  The dominent one did show on day 3 before we stimmed and I think that was the problem.  Maybe next time I will get two mature eggs

Fee
xx


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## Guest (Jan 15, 2010)

Yeeeeeeeeeeah! come on embie!!!!!


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Phew! Fee I was almost afraid to look! Well done you!!   It looks like your eggies and your DH's sperm are just made for each other!  That's good news about your DH - it must make the DIY option and IUI much more feasible. It's amazing what a change in diet can do - is your DH good about making an effort or does he (like mine) need a bit of nagging? I've subjected my poor DH to my supplements obsession so he's had all sorts, but mostly L-Arginine, L-Carnitine and antioxidants. I think it did make quite a difference to abnormal forms and motility results. 
So are you going for ET tomorrow?    

Moog - Brilliant results so far.    Four out of five is a very good fertilisation rate. Have you had blasts before?       for all four. Will you get another call tomorrow with an update?

Coco - hope you are feeling ok     Would a meet up make you feel better? We could try to find a new date.

Hi to everyone else  

love Clucky
xxxxx

PS Lukey the only obstacle to me cycling this time would be FSH - you know how strict they are. I've always been fine before but last cycle was the highest its ever been (around 9) so a bit too close to the no go zone for comfort.
Fee - they down reg me because I asked them to change from the flare protocol after speaking to Dr Sher. My LH is hard to control on the short protocol and I end up taking masses of cetrotide which I think isn't brilliant for egg quality! But what do I know? Mr T will do whatever he thinks best!!


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Congratulations to Moog and Fi for successful egg collection and fertilisation!  Really good news and I'm hoping that they develop nicely ready for transfer very soon    

Fi, I wish I could get my DH to take some supplements or change his diet, although I'm quite lucky I guess as his sperm count was normal when we had it tested.  Still, I think it always helps to do as much as possible to make sure everything is working as well as it can - says she sitting on the sofa, eating 2 bars of chocolate...   

Lukey, I am so sorry that I didn't mention you in my last post, I really meant to as it's lovely that you are doing so well, especially as you have tried so many times and been so supportive to everyone on the thread (as are you all!) 

Hi Clucky, I don't know if you wanted to lower your fsh but I have heard that dhea can lower it?  Although  I know that ARGC can be particular about allowing treatment if your fsh is over 10, I don't think the Lister have that rule so maybe it could be something to think about if the ARGC don't play ball?


To all of you, thank you so much for your lovely words and kind wishes. You are all very wise women and what you say makes perfect sense!  Sorry I was being a bit of a misery (and I am sure it won't be the last time  ) It's so nice that I can 'talk' to a group of women who really know how I feel and are so supportive 

I've also given myself a bit of a kick up the bum and have booked an appointment (with Mr Abdullah, no less!) on Tuesday next week to get the go-ahead to start the next cycle.  I have to just get on with it as I am not getting any younger.  And I'll just have to keep beating up the 0% credit card!!  I am trying to be positive in that I got 5 eggs last time and 4 wee mature, with 3 fertilising - I have to focus on that!  What you have all said has really encouraged me too so thank you 
xx

ps would love to try to meet up again!


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Just a quicky today

Moog - oooohhh great news - you know Vicks (who posts on here) had four, they put the best three back BFN but then she had a FET with last remaining one and got pregnant.  Looking forward to hearing back about your transfer Moog.

Coco - don't beat yourself up.  We all have times where we wonder how we are going to find the strength to carry on.  But to be fair, we have seen quite a few pregnancies on here, and we have to keep hoping that we will be there too soon.  I am glad you are moving forward.  Be nice to hear about your appointment.

Clucky - ahh - you have told me something new about Cetrotide - didn't know that.  I do think Mr T really is the best and whatever he says,goes.  Yep, can't get DH to take any pills whatsoever.  So, he is having nuts, fruit, spinach etc shoved under his nose every meal time.

AFM - transfer was at 11am this morning.  And well, I only have one egg, and we know what the odds are..... I dare not tempt fate, so I am just going to say that the egg was a grade one four-cell (looks v much like last one) and I have to be content that this in itself is something to hold on to for the long term.

Fee
xx


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## Guest (Jan 16, 2010)

eeeeeeeeeeek! Just like last time will do very nicely Fee!! EVERYTHING crossed


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Fee    fantastic news   Come on perfect embie - Snuggle in!      

Moog - is your transfer going ahead today? If so          

clucky
xxxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Evening everyone  

Just a quick good luck to Fi and The Moog who both had fantastic sounding transfers - grade one embies no less, well done 

I hope everyone else is well, am getting ready for my appt at Lister on Tuesday (with only half my blood test results - big c*ck up by the NHS...don't ask...) so I may end up having the tests done at the Lister anyway!

xx


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## Guest (Jan 18, 2010)

Oh Coco  - how annoying ....still you get to see the lovely Mr A tomorrow and he will tell you all you need to know   
Mooooooog - brilliant news!!! take it easy but not too easy is my advice    
Hi Clucky - day 3 bloods this week right?! eeeeeeeeek!
How's it going Fee and little embie?    

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Everyone

Thanks for all your lovely words ....

Me and the embie are okay ta.  It is really hard to manage my emotions because obviously I want to believe that there is a chance, but at the same time,the odds are low and I only have one    I try really hard to think long term, and beyond this cycle.I have worked out I should be able to fit another 2-3 before I am 43 in August.

HOpe things go well at Lister Coco   

Luuuuukkkey - how are you?  are you feeling any more comfortable now you have had a scan? or is it a constant worry?

Moog - well done girl.  I think you are in with a good chance with that.  Do you have any for freezing?

Fee


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hello Everyone

Very short of time, but conscious that I haven't made it on here properly for days.  Just want to say that I have everything crossed for Fee and Moog.  It sounds like you are both in with a good chance and I wish you the best of luck possible xxxxxxxx                Keep those feet up on the sofa and warm!

Love to everyone, Love, Harris xxxxx


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello everyone - may I join you?

I've periodically lurked on this board and you all seem so supportive of each other.  So, as I hit the dreaded 40 in Dec, I thought it was time to post. 

I guess my signature tells my story - ttc # 1 for nearly 5 years.  Our first IVF cycle in July last year ended with a miscarriage at 12 weeks.  Everything appeared fine, but at the 12 week scan we discovered the baby had died 2- 3 weeks earlier. Part of me would like to just take a break, but I know we need to carry on trying whilst we still have a chance.  We were lucky in July - 20 eggs and 14 fertilised, so we ended up with 6 frosties.  However, we've decided to keep those for the moment and try another fresh cycle.  I start down-regging tomorrow.  Eeek!  I'm not sure I feel wholly prepared for this next cycle - very mixed feelings and I certainly don't feel as emotionally or physically strong as I did in July.  But hey ho.  You've gotta try - haven't you?!

Moog and Fee - very best of luck to you both.  I have been following your progress and am so pleased you both got to transfer.  Keeping everything crossed for you.

And to everyone else - I very much look forward to getting to know you.

CowHatGirl x


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Morning all

Fee - how are your feeling? Positive I hope!     Are you managing to take it easy? 

Moog - well done! 3 fantastic little embies. That is a great result. You sound like you have the right idea - feet up, nice and cosy! If you could take all the stress out of the 2ww I think it would actually be quite enjoyable - able to be very lazy with impunity!!

Big welcome to Cowhatgirl. I'm so sorry to hear about the outcome of your last IVF cycle.   That must have been heartbreaking and I know some of the girls here know will know exactly how you feel. Well done for giving it another go - sometimes it is hard to know when you are ready but you have had a little break so if  you feel up to it you now will be ok.  I am very impressed with your last performance - 20 eggs!! Wow! What is your secret?? Wishing you lots of     for your new cycle. Which clinic are you at? 

Morning Lukey - hope all's well with you. Yep, I'm waiting for AF (or maybe not, you never know!!) so will start soon I suppose.

Harris - hope you are feeling fine too!   You must be very busy with a little one to look after - hope you're not feeling too tired. 

Vicks - any news?   

Hi Coco - hope your appointment with Mr A goes well today. I didn't ever get to meet him but I'm sure he'll give you good advice. Hopefully he will be able to give you some words of encouragement.  

Hello Georgie!  

Lots of    to all

love clucky xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Clucky - how are you love?  hopefully your hormones are going to play ball and you will soon also be going again.

Cowhatgirl - well, I have officially got "egg envy".       No seriously, I think you are very wise to go for a fresh cycle because if you always have your frosties as back up, and your frosties will always be "younger".  Am so sorry to hear what happened.  Miscarriages are awful, but "getting pregnant" indicates that your body can implant and the likelyhood is that you will get pregnant again.

Moog - you know I have this feeling that the embryos are better back in the body and that blastocyst really just helps them sort the better from the weaker.  Three grade ones is all you need 

Coco- what did MrA say?

Harris    how are you.  Has the bleeding stopped?  Are you having symptoms?  Are you exited? So many questions

AFM - I have a stupid tickly cough and I am wondering if it will stop my little emby implanting?  absolutely stupid thought, I know.  I don't get much chance for a rest unfortunately, but my feet are very warm.

Fee


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi ladies

How is everyone today?

Fi, I am sure your cough won't affect your embies chances, but I understand it is completely natural to worry about it.  The best thing is to keep as stress free as possible (am laughing as I type this coz I was the stress bunny from hell during my 2ww!   ) and rest up.  I'm sending loads of +ve vibes your way      x

Hi Lukey, how are you - how far along are you (sorry, have lost track a little   ).  Do you have another scan booked x

Hi to Pinkflowers and Vicks67, hope you are both well.

Clucky - I know what it's like wanting AF to come - about the only time in the world that you want her to arrive is before tx!!  

Moog, how are you, taking it easy I hope x

Hi Harris    I've been wondering how you are coping with a little one and being pregnant too - it must be hard sometimes although I know you wouldn't want it any other way 

Hi Georgie, where are you lovely lady?

Hello cowhat girl, welcome to this lovely thread   I am sorry to read about your loss, a lot of us here unfortunately know what that is like   it takes time to get over something like that - I had a break of three months after my m/c at 9 wks even though age-wise it was probably not the best decision, so I think you are right to go for it now.

Well, I saw Mr A today - was a little nervous to be honest, as he is such a big honcho   but he was ok - he was a little bit 'authoritative' but he obviously knows what he is talking about and he got straight to the point which I appreciated.  He told me to get the blood tests done (for clotting) and to try the NHS again and if there were any issues, I can take hesparin (sp?) and asprin but that I won't have to take it until ec, if I need it at all.  He also asked me if I had heard about nk killer cells which I said I had but he said he wasn't convinced by current research that they actually did anything for most women - I said I thought the same (from my limited knowledge!) although I guess if they were fully accepted tests I would have it done....

So basically, wait for af - next week I hope, altho still hoping for a natural bfp...   and then off I go again!  I have to have another fsh and amh test done too, so they can decide whether to increase my drugs so i am not looking forward to the results of those  

I am glad I've done it, it felt like I wasn't ready until now.

Love to all
xxx


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Dear All, Just popping in to say good luck to Fee and Moog-take it easy and lots of     for a BFP!

Coco-Sounds like a good consultation, I took heparing and aspirin in both my cycles, wasn't too much hassel. Hope AF arrives soon!

Clukey-hope the FSH doesn't let you down and that you are able to get going again soon!

Harris, Lukey-Hows it going with your respective little beans?

Georgie-hope all is well with you!

Cohatgirl-I'm sorry you had such a crap time, but it sounds like you respond really well, so good luck with the next cycle!

AFM-11weeks tomorrow-still taking it day by day and knicker checking! Got 12 week scan on 28th with nuchal translucency-dreading it!
Vicky


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## bizi5 (Mar 29, 2009)

Ladies, I'm afraid that I have some very sad news to pass on from Lukey - she asked me to post here for you all. Her scan today sadly showed a missed mc at 9 weeks      .

I'm sure your support will be valued by her when she feels ready to post again.

xxx


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Oh Lukey ... I'm so sorry hun


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

oh no Lukey, not you...   I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but you have tried so hard and come so far...I am so sorry to hear your very sad news   

I hope you and DP can hold each other and comfort each other, you must be so devastated, I am so sorry    
xx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Ohhhh Lukey .... what to say 

I am so sorry love     ....... as if it isn't hard enough just getting pregnant.  

It is totally devastating ..... 

I hope that you and your DH find comfort in each other.     

Fee
xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi everyone...  Sorry I have been so bad at posting lately.  I've been feeling really rough and haven't been making it over to the office much.  I have been keeping an eye on everything though....

Lukey - I am so, so sorry my dear       I don't know what to say apart from what, sad, unexpected news.  I really feel for you and your DH - it really is the worst feeling in the world.            I think 7-8 weeks is a really tricky transition time and I was so pleased that you'd made it past it....  Take all the time you need, but we're all here for you.  

Fee - how are you feeling? I've got my fingers, thumbs, toes, legs, arms and eyes crossed for you hun.        What is your OTD?  Are you keeping your feet warm    

Coco - I was so pleased to read that your consult went well.....  I always feel so much better when I have a plan. Don't worry about the heparin - I take it and the injections are easy to do and don't hurt too much - your tummy will end up being very bruised though!  Fingers crossed for a natural BFP        

xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Part two.....

Vicks - congratulations on making it to 11 weeks          You must be counting the days until your scan.... Are you doing the combined blood test too?  How have you been feeling?  

MOog - how are you feeling?  I hope you're keeping your feet warm too.  I'm afraid I got a little confused (nothing new there  ).  Did you go to blast with 3 or day 3 with 3?  Either way, I hope they are snuggling up    

Clucky - so lovely to see your post...  Did AF arrive this week?  Are you all set to go again          Did you ever see your builder again

Cowhatgirl - welcome to the most lovely board....  I was so sad reading your signature.  We've all had such tough journies to get this far....  I'm so sorry to read about your last cycle - it must have felt devastating...  I think your plan of a fresh cycle sounds great - the frosties will always be there....  I might have missed it, but which clinic are you with?  Do you like them / feel happy?  

xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Part Three....

Georgie - sorry I missed you on the phone.  I'm going to call at the weekend, although I'm not sure when you're off on your holiday  

Hi to everyone else out there.  xx

AFM - I'm 10 weeks tomorrow and have been feeling really rough this week - sick / tired during the day / not sleeping at night ...  As Coco says, I wouldn't want it any other way, but it has been difficult with DS - it's almost as if the wee monkey knows when I'm not feeling so hot!!  I'm very grateful to reach this stage and know that it won't last for long though.  Sorry if I don't get online as much, but I'm trying to rest when DS rests and then I can't face coming over to the office in the evening...  I'm very excited as we've booked some holidays....  A few days in Dorset in our favourite hotel in early Feb and then a week with Club Med in early May.  We didn't have a proper holiday last year, so I can hardly wait!

Love to all,    Harris xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Lukey I am so so sorry.     There's nothing I can say to make it better for you.      to you and your DH. You will be OK eventually, but right now you must be going through the worst time imaginable. I am gutted for you.    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

love clucky
xxx


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## armi (Sep 1, 2007)

Hi girls
Gatecrashing your thread- though I am 40 so I guess it is allowed.

I am currently stimming and hopefully will have maybe 4 or 5 at EC...but one of my friends currently only has 1 follie- would they go to EC with that or transfer to IUI..IF you get a choice what would you suggest she do in her position/

Lukey so sorry- I know we have crossed threads etc in the past.


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Armi

I think it really depends on the clinic she goes to and what the underling problem is.  For me, because we our main issue is Male factor, I went to egg collection this last time with two follies one smaller than the other. 


You will see from my signature, it only takes one to get a BFP

Fiona


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi Armi  - are you asking for me? Bless you   (I told you I was stalking you!! )

Fiona - I have low AMH, sperm should  be fine as it's from a bank (young with proven pregnancies) - I have two follies (one 11mm and one 8.5mm) on day 10 of stimming (today). I'm getting the impression that the clinic won't let me go to egg collection unless *both* get to a really good size - if it's not too rude to ask  how big were your follies when you went to egg collection (or at the scan before)?

Thank you lovely ladies  
GIA Tooxx


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## armi (Sep 1, 2007)

GIAtoo     , yep was asking for you. Curious also now to ask about the size of the follies as I just got the call from hospital to say my EC is on Tuesday. They tell me that the follies grow at 2mm a day...so if mine grow at that rate I might have 2/3. Will they collects ones that a a cmm or more below that magic 20mm??

What sizes were your at EC...just A general question thrown to all you ladies.


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi,

At the last scan, one was about 20mm and the other 14mm, but they do grow 1-2 per day yes.

What amount of drugs are you on Gia?  I was on 450IU.

Fiona


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## armi (Sep 1, 2007)

GIA and I also are on 450 i/u.


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Lukey...      iam so so sorry....im really upset..im lost for words...will pray that you get through this ok.

lots of luv
hope


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Thanks so much everyone for your warm welcome. I really look forward to getting to know you better. x

Will try to post more in the next few days (apologies for my absence.  I've been away for a couple of nights in a spa..naughty but nice) - but I initially just wanted to express how sorry I am to read your news Lukey.  This journey is just so damned hard and so unfair. I am sorry.

Thinking of you.  CowHatGirl x


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hi everyone

Fee - how are you coping with the 2ww? Do you have any symptoms at all? I am thinking of you      

And Moog - are you managing to stay sane? Daytime TV makes me feel a bit crazy! Re the warm feet thing, my acupuncturist told me that keeping your feet warm can prevent the uterus from spasming. I don't know if its true but it feels nice to have toasty warm feet! 

Harris - I'm not surprised you are tired. Have you told DS about the baby yet or are you going to wait a while? Maybe he'll be nice to you when you do! Your holidays sound lovely. It's especially nice when you book in advance and can look forward to it. Have you booked you 12 week scan?

Vicks -       for your scan on Thursday. Hopefully you will be able to relax a bit afterwards.   

Cowhatgirl - Hi to you. Hope you are well.  

Georgie - have you been skiing yet? Lucky you! Hope you are keeping well too.  

Coco. Glad your consulation went well.   So you could be starting again very soon? Do you need to go on the pill first or straight into a new cycle when AF arrives?  

Lukey     

Best of luck to GIA and Armi   

AFM I am now on the suprefact, but have developed a whopping ovarian cyst so we'll have to wait and see if the down-regging works! Busy swotting for an interview so better get on.

love and   to all
clucky
xxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi all

Just a quickie to say hello really.

Fi and Moog, sending you lots of +ve vibes.  WHen do you test?  Can't be that long 

Clucky I hope they can help you with the cyst - was it a surprise that they found it or did you already know?  Good luck with the interview x

Hi Georgie, I hope all is ok with you.

Lukey, have been thinking about you a lot.  Am really hoping you are feeling a little stronger, although I know you must have been devastated  

Hi everyone else  

As for me, not much to tell really I am just waiting for af to arrive, it should be tomorrow but have had none of my usual symptoms yet, typically!    I will be starting the pill Clucky, I didn't know that you couldn't?    It worked ok last time so I am hoping (praying  ) that it will work again this time.
xx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Just a quicky today.  I am not feeling too positive about this one.  I have had no symptoms (unlike my other two pregnancies), and I feel just like I do before a period starts.  The AF feelings are increasing to a crescendo.  I did do a test on Sunday with very sensitive test (which I know is too early) but not a sniff of a line.

I know that I have to wait until tomorrow, but it aint looking good girls.

Fee
xx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Oh God Fee you must be so worried.    All I can say is that for my 2 biochems, one had no symptoms at all the other had ferocious AF symptoms - you really won't know til you test. Praying for good news for you tomorrow           
love clucky xxx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi everyone

Just logging on to wish you lots of postive vibes Fee            This is the worst bit, but try and be patient for tomorrow....         

Moog - good luck for you too.  Are you managing to stay sane??

Clucky - what a pain about your cyst....          Hopefully it will disappear...  What happens if it doesn't?  Who is your interview with?  Is this for teaching  Really good luck with it.    

Coco - I hope that AF is on its way soon.  Mine always turns up late just when I need it to be on time...      

Vicks - not sure when your scan is, but really good luck with it     

Cowhatgirl - hi there!!  x


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Part 2...

Lukey - you've been on my mind all week.  How are you feeling?          

Geogie - I think you are away skiing - hope you are having a brilliant time.

Hi to everyone else...

AFM - not much to report here.  We're busy talking to lots of builders and gathering quotes for our extension and home improvement projects!  I find it all quite exhausting....  My bleeding stopped last week which is really good, but I've had quite bad cramps.  Have booked another scan for Friday ...  

Love, Harris xxxxx


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello everyone

Lukey - thinking of you.

Fee - it doesn't get any easier does it, the 2ww.  But you know it's so difficult to predict the outcome, based on symptoms (or lack of them).  I was utterly, utterly convinced AF was on her way when I got my BFP last year, but I know that each cycle is different.  Wishing you loads of positive thoughts and hoping for good news tomorrow. 

Moog - how are you getting on?  When is your OTD?

Hello to everyone else.  And thanks again for the lovely welcome.  Apologies but I'm still not completely up to speed with where everyone is on their journey, but will get there, promise!

Harris Tweed - thanks for your welcome and congrats on your pregnancy.  You asked about my clinic - I'm with the Wessex in Southampton, though using Bournemouth hospital as a satellite for scans and bloods.  They were good 1st time, so hopefully will work their magic again.  And I'm intrigued about your holiday plans- sounds great!  Which part of Dorset will you be visiting?

AFM - cycle 2 started last week.  Down-regging going ok.  Back for scan Friday (5th) to check everything is quiet and then onto stimms.  Fortunately I didn't really experience s/e on the Buserelin last time, other than becoming a complete 'airhead'!  And this cycle seems no different... I just have an inability to remember a thing... I forget what I'm doing, midway through doing it!  Small price to pay I suppose.

Best wishes all.  CowHatGirl x


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## armi (Sep 1, 2007)

Moog so sorry. fROM reading sifgline I think you need to kep going. THE average amount of attepts is 4, so perhaps you are bog standard MOOG!!


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Evening

Not long in, another long day - pretty much par for the course at the mo, am exhausted!

Moog, just wanted to send you a few    Am so sorry that it wasn't good news for you and I know how devastated you feel    I am really glad to hear you are giving it another go though, four attempts at our age sounds reasonable, to say the least.

Fi - am sending you lots of    for your test.  When are you doing the hpt?  Will be thinking of you hon x

Hi Clucky 

Cowhat girl, I know what you mean about the drugs and memory issues! Although I think my issues are due to me just being me!  

Harris, are you feeling better now, you were feeling under the weather a little while ago?

Hi Georgie, I hope you are feeling ok!

AF arrived for me yesterday, so I have to go for an AMH test tomorrow which I am dreading...I know it's better to know but I am constantly on the verge of tears at the moment (caused by hormones and life!) so I dread to think where a bad result will push me to...

xx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Coco -    Good luck for AMH test  
GIA tooxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi

Moog ..... I am sorry.... , nothing prepares us for the negatives.  I am sure I will be joining you tomorrow. I feel like I am going to explode.  But you have had a chemical, and this is a good sign.

Take care love.

Coco ... At the end of the day, what does it matter about your amh. You know how u respond. And it is okay.... We all have to work with what we have got.

Love Fee
xxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Moog - sorry to hear your news   

Fee - here's some     - you never know   

Clucky - thanks for the good luck wishes   Hope the dr works and good luck for your interview (or if you've had it - how did it go) 

GIA Too xx


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## Harris Tweed (Nov 28, 2007)

Hi everyone

Moog - I am so sorry for you and your DH about your BFN      It is such a big disappointment and I hope you will be good to yourselves and look after each other.      Great to already have a plan for number 4 - as Armi says,  lets hope you are bog standard!!

FEe - thinking of you this morning...     

Hi Coco - really good luck with your AMH tests.                  All is good with me thanks, I seem to still be quite up and down and emotional....        

Hi CowhatGirl - I hope Bournmouth / Southampton work their magic again for you      We're off to stay in our favourite hotel in Evershot - we will be spoilt rotten for three days!!!  

Big hit to GoingitAlone and Armi!      

Love to everyone else,  Harris xxxx


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## Krispichick (Nov 27, 2008)

Hi there
just crashing in to say good luck to Fee today
Have been thinking about you and send lots of     over the ether
Take care Honey
Kx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

just to let you know that i probably will do test tomorrow.

AF symptoms dying down but spotting.  Never know how much the cyclogest prevents bleeding 

Expecting BFN

Fee
xx


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## jo_11 (Apr 1, 2009)

Hey everyone,

I hope you don't mind me jumping in on your thread.  I was wondering if anyone can give me some pearls of wisdom... or anything to stop the panic!!

I'm currently stimming and had my first scan yesterday (day 5 of injections).  Unfortunately the nurse could only see two follicles on my scan   I've been told that first scans can be 'deceiving' although I'm not convinced... Google searches seem to think I should have had about 10.  

I guess I'm wondering what my options are.  Yes, I need to go back for a second scan tomorrow and there may be some that miraculously appear but I'm not holding out much hope.  

I was kind of taken by surprise as my hormone levels are all fine and when I did an ICSI cycle last September I was on lower medications (I'm currently on the maximum but a different mix) but produced more; I had six follicles at my first scan (this was another clinic).  Tx is at CRGH.

Thanks.

Jo


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

hello ladies  

I've just found this thread !  How wonderful to have a thread or us still fighting the good fight. Or in my case  not sure to  give it
one more  go    
I'm a chat host ,  was wondering if anyone  would like  a '40s... the new 30s' themed  chat night sometime? I could make us our very own room and everything   .
jo_1105  in answer to you question,  our age tends to make us late developers folicle wise , other folicles suddenly apear in later  scans . I was told  lots of  water  to help hydration, which is reqired to grow eggs/folicles.  Also  a warm (not hot ) wheat bag  on tummy for  aproz 20 mins a day can be productive too  
Hang on in there hon , and remember  2 is better than nothing!  It can happen  

Loads of  luv  Sue


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## jo_11 (Apr 1, 2009)

Sue:  Thanks for your message, that does make me feel better.  Fingers crossed I just have lazy follies and more will pop up at tomorrow's scan.  And thanks for the tip on water; ordinarily I struggle to make myself have 1.5 litres a day but on the meds I'm on I'm actually downing about 4 to 5 litres a day... and peeing for England!    I'm doing the heat pads thanks; I'm hoping that'll help with my lining as well - apparently that was rubbish too, which has never been the case before


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hello to all, the familiar names and a few new ones

Moog - I'm so very sorry to hear it didn't work for you this time.      I know how upset you must be but I'm so impressed by your positive attitude. You are obviously very strong and you are right not to give up on your dream.       

Fee                             I'm feeling really nervous for you!

Harris - I hope your scan is stress free tomorrow.     Are you nearing 12 weeks now?

Vicks - hoping you had all good news at your scan today.

Coco - how was the AMH? Though as Fee says, it doesn't really matter -you obviously have responded fine on previous cycles and that is what really counts.

Hello Suedulux! My evenings tend to be busy so I doubt if I would make it to a chatroom (quite apart from being technologically challenged!). I do think it's a lovely idea.

Hi Jo - hope you got better news at today's scan, although you'll know from this thread title that we're all convinced that it's quality rather than quantity which really matters! 

Lukey - thinking of you. I hope you are ok, all things considered.      

Hi Georgie  

Hi Cowhatgirl - I'd love to know how you came up with your name! I know what you mean about down regging drugs. I can feel my brain slowing down!

GIA - hello to you. What stage are you at in your cycle?

Thanks for all the good wishes re my interview. I can't believe how nervous I felt but it was all fine (apart from having to do a maths test which I wasn't expecting!). Now I wait to hear. 
Re the surprise cyst I'm now on pregnyl, suprefact and provera to try to get rid of it, so it will probably be a couple of weeks before I can start stimming. 

Love to all, but special    to Lukey and Moog, and       for Fee.

Clucky
xxxxx


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

Moog hi ya 
First you'll need to download 'java' which is the operating system, its free . Here's the link to the 'Chat Zone ' board . Click on it and find 'how to enter chat' it will tell ya how to do it . http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=453.0 .
Let me know how it goes ? PM me if ya need some help, or if ya manage to get access to chat, let me know and I'll show you around 
Then all we need to do is agree a time to have the ' 40s... the new 30s' chat 

luv sue


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## vicks67 (Jul 9, 2009)

Dear All, Sorry I'm posting only occasionally but have ben following very closely.

Lukey-I'm sorry to have heard your news, i've been thinking of you and DH and hope that time cn heal  

Moog-Sorry to hear about your BFN-Good that you plan to get back on with things ASAP.

Fee- I hope tomorrow brings you some good news!

Jo-Hello again!

Clukey-Hope the cyst goes soon and you can get going again soon! Glad your interview went well.

Hi to everyone else.

AFM-had Nuchal translucency scan today and all was well. Was so nervous because of my age but Downs risk came out at 1/900 which was fine by me. So beginning to think that this might actually happen!
Vicky


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sorry for lack of PMs, but really want your opinions ladies.....

I am going crazy and I want to get off this rollercoaster    Went for my scan today - was in the bl**dy clinic for 2 hours again    Scan showed one follie had grown to 18mm, but the other had only grown to 12.6 mm (i.e. 0.6mm more).  I was disappointed, but then surprised when they said I could for EC on Monday with no further scans and got excited.  Had to get more drugs, which is a bummer.  Anyway, then I got a call tonight saying that the Doc wanted me to go in for another scan on Saturday  
So I'm thinking that the little follie won't grow anymore and they won't let me go for EC and I'll have to abandon and I've had enough of this!      Sorry to be a misery. My consultant only gave me a 3% chance of success if I only got one egg (this went up to 28% if I got 2 eggs) so I don't think it is worth going to EC with one follie do you?  

GIA Tooxx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hi Gia

So sorry that you're having such a stressful time. I had a cycle once where they didn't like the way things were going so they suggested switching to IUI - is that a possibility for you? It would mean at least that the cycle wouldn't be completely abandoned. 

My doc told be it was really just a question of money - if you can afford to and want to go to EC for one egg then they really shouldn't stop you. Perhaps you could ask your doc about the prospects of another cycle - now that they can see how you respond do they think you might do better on another protocol, so is it worth waiting for another try rather than pushing on to EC this time? Of course they won't be able to offer any guarantees.  

I must confess I ignored my docs advice and went for EC and they got more eggs than they thought, but it's a lot of money to gamble. I hope your Doc gives you good advice tomorrow and helps you to make the right decision.     

Vicks - such lovely news   

Fee      

Love clucky
xxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Oh Clucky - I've just read your signature and I feel so awful moaning about my one cycle when you have been through so much    
They did talk about IUI last week.  I think I am going to try and speak to my consultant today as you're right, I need to know whether they think I might to better on a different protocol.  I doubt it though as from the beginning he told me there was a high risk of the cycle being abandoned.  

Fee - I so hope you get a BFP today      

Vicks - brilliant that all is going so well - hope you can start to relax more now   

Jo - good luck with your scan - hope you get more follies, but as everyone keeps saying to me, it's quality that is important    

Harris - thanks for the      

Hope everyone else is ok  
GIA tooxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi

just a real quicky tonight. I will do personals over weekend.

It was a BFN for me, as expected.

I seem to know when it has worked so I was not overly emotional .

We hAve run out of money and dh doesn't want to ask his parents, so I am now thinking about donor. But I want to movle quickly and dh won't accept the reality and our options. This is hard for me as it is painful to be in limbo. If I can't have my own genetic child then I want to move on

anyway, thank you all for your support, onward and upward

love fi
xxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Fi    

I'm so sorry hon that you had a negative result.  I know you suspected that would be the outcome but it is still devastating.  

I can hear that you want to move quickly and take action toward your goal of having a child.  Perhaps DH is still a little bit in shock and there may still be a possibility of having another go with your own eggs?  When you say dh won't accept reality, do you mean he still wants to have another go with your eggs?  If you can, it might be worth a try as you have responded well in the past.  Have you had the donor egg chat with him really, or is it still quite a new idea to him?  It may be a little too soon after your sad news today for him to think about the next step - I think men take longer to adjust to the idea of de than us, generally speaking.  My DH is still at the stage of 'I can't get my head round it' so I have my work cut out there  

I hope none of what I have said is upsetting      I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and don't give up Fi, you can get to your goal  
xx


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Fee      
I'm so sorry for you. You are being brave about it but it is very very hard. I so know what you mean about needing a plan - I think it is the only way to get over a BFN. 
Do you think you could persuade your DH to go for an appointment at Zita West - Jane (I can't recall her surname) is very good at explaining DE and makes it seem like the easiest and most natural decision in the world. I think it sometimes helps men to hear these things said by professionals rather than our own explanations. 
Another thing to keep in mind is that, apart from your real need to move on, there is no biological time pressure if you decide to go the DE route, so do not panic too much. Your DH will catch up with your thinking in his own time. He is probably still reeling from this cycle.

love clucky
xxxxx


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## Guest (Jan 31, 2010)

Hi girls

Just wanted to pop on and say so sorry to Moog and to Fee.....it is so hard.....   

Fee - the need to feel we are doing something positive that MAY actually work is incredibly strong - I so agree  ....I am sorry that DH is not on the same page quite yet....I do think most men just can't entertain DE for quite some time - so you are by no means alone. I agree with Clucky though that the best outome is to do it when you are both ready and tbh as someone who has been looking into it for over a year now - I can honestly say that only in the last 3 months (before my little miracle... ) have I felt truly ready - I do think there is an awful lot to consider when doing DE - both for you, DH and the child; both now and in the future - so you have to be absolutely sure and certain as to which route is right for you. The pain of a BFN is raw so allow yourself time to deal with that, do some research and perhaps then revisit with DH in a few months - the best time is when you are both ready honestly.....only after a year of looking into it can my DH really talk about it with any excitement.

Thnx for all of your messages......I know some of you have been through the same so know exactly how it feels - I would not wish it on my worst enemy.....you just don't realise how much you love something so small after seeing it grow inside you for those early weeks   .....the sadness is not about having to start again/will it ever work etc - it is ALL about what you have lost   

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi

Promise, I will write some personals soon - really knackered after sanding skirting boards all day ...

I just wanted to say, lovely to see you back Lukey    , and how sweet of you to think of me and Moog, when I am sure it is still very difficult for you.  I have been thinking about you alot.

I hope you are okay Lukey ....you know, you said something that I have said many times to my mum when she apologises for having to tell me that a member of the family is pregnant .... and I say "mum ...I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy"

More tomorrow

Fee


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello

Just a quickie from me as at work..

Fee - I'm so sorry to hear it was a BFN.  I know you weren't feeling everso optimistic this time, but it's always such a disappointment.  Really sorry. x

Lukey - I know there's very little anyone can say to make it feel better or hurt any less, but just wanted to send a hug.  Thinking of you.

Hi to everyone else.  Sorry for short post - will try to catch up more later.

CowHatGirl xx


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

Hi again  

Can everyone let me know when they might be available  for  a chat in chat? 
Then I can be there  when you arrive  , and show you around ?

Luv  sue


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sue - most evenings, I never go out these days !  

Fi - really sorry about your BFN - I hope you are looking after yourself and DH   

AFM - got two eggs yesterday and one fertilised, so I am trying to be positive    ET is on Thursday.

GIA Tooxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi ladies

Good to see you back Lukey, I have been thinking about you and wondering how you are  .  It is such a horrible thing to go through, I am not sure it's something you ever truly completely get over, I think it just gets a little easier with time.  Have you had any thoughts about what you will do next, or are you taking some time to heal?    This is such a tough road to travel  

Fi, how are you sweetie?  I hope that you and dh have been able to comfort each other   Have you managed to have a chat with him about next steps or is it still too soon? I am like you in that I like a plan but dh seems to be so slow behind me, it took me ages to convince him that we had to try IVF  

Hi Going it alone, lots of   to your little embie, great that you have one fertilised and best of luck for et tomorrow.  I noticed your signature said that you are single and are indeed 'going it alone' - I hope you have a good network of support behind you for your journey as this can be so difficult   - although I know the ladies on this board are a great help too xx

Hi Harris, how are you - I hope some of the sick feeling has faded and you can move in to the more enjoyable phase of pregnancy - although I'd quite like to experience all of it really  

Hi Clucky, cowhat girl how are you both? x Anyone heard from Georgie?  

Not much news from me - taking the pill at the mo.  This tx might take a bit longer than usual though as dh has to travel and it might mess up the tx schedule by a few days so still waiting to hear about that!    Oh well, I guess a few more days won't make a lot of difference...?
xx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hello All

Sorry , I have been lurking for a while, havent been too active on FF since my last IVF which resulted in a painful ectopic...and I really should update my signature as i am well over 42 now.

I am sorry for the BFNs of late on here...I so want this thread to have BFPs all the way. I am on my 2ww..actually should be testing today but i know cyclogest delays my period by 4 days so i am not going to test until sunday if af doesnt show by then as I have had 3 years of disappointment..so dont want to rush to get a BFN...besides I dont have any symptoms other than pre AF ones..so am not raising my hopes up too much..

I just wanted to pop in to say that..looking at most of your signatures..you are mostly in  your early 40's. My friend who i have known since we were kids (our mothers were friends) got married at 45...a year later at 46  she had a little girl..very healthy and she breast fed her...

I know its her biological child as she is very open and a happy sort of person and would definatley tell me if it wasnt her own baby...infact she called me the moment she found out she was pregnant instead of worrying to get past the 12 weeks stage...also her family have very distinctive features and her baby is the spitting image of her mother and her maternal nephew.

I just wanted to say that it can happen..with your own eggs...I know everyones bodies are different and my friend is the sort that never worries about anything so its probably had a positive effect on her eggs...so maybe we should all try and be happier...i try so hard...but i worry when i dont have anything to worry about..worrying about the next thing that I will have to deal with..so i constantly have adrenalin runnning through me poisoning everything.


Its great on here..we are all here for each other and it relieves our stress...so lets remember...its still possible..


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## Fluges (Feb 1, 2010)

Hi
I hope you ladies don't mind me joining but I too have been lurking for a few months and reading your posts have kept me going.
As you will see I am also in my 40s seeking the elusive but despite 2 BFPs (which have been a complete shock after all these years of trying) I have sadly had 2 miscarriages in the last 5 months.
Am not sure where to turn now as the doctors keep telling us that it is just bad luck but I have just made an appointment to go back to the clinic to see about our 3rd full cycle and whether they will carry out any tests to see if there is any reason that we have lost the 2 babies. I am still waiting for all the pathology results but have been told it's unlikely to shed any light.
Having looked through many of the boards I always come back to this one as I seem to relate to so much of what you are all going through.

DC


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## clucky (Nov 5, 2008)

Hi everyone  

Lukey - How are you?      Your post brought tears to my eyes. I know how empty and sad I felt after our last biochem and imagine what you have been through magnifies that a thousand times. Hope you are starting to feel a bit better.

Fee - how are you feeling?     How is your DH too?  Sanding skirting boards sounds very industrious - I hope you are also finding time to treat yourself.  

Coco - well done on starting again. I hope you are feeling positive about this cycle.     

Harris - I really hope your scan last week went well and everything is ok  

Vicks - hello 

GIA - Hope that embie is a fighter and your ET went ahead as planned yesterday.       for the next 2 weeks. When is your test day?

Hi Moog - you are sounding very upbeat about things - That's what we like to see!  Lucky you - getting your GP to do the immune testing! 

Hope25 - thanks for sharing such a lovely story. Most doctors would tell me that I'm wasting my time so it's fantastic to hear about the few successes. Sorry to hear about your last cycle  

Hello Dark Cloud and Welcome. So sorry about your 2 miscarriages  .  Sometimes these sad things are just bad luck, but 'bad luck' is all too often used by doctors who sometimes see us all on the basis of averages. I hope your clinic will be thorough about it so that you can feel confident about your next cycle. 

Hi Cowhatgirl - I've forgotten what stage you're at. Have you already started your treatment? 

Hi Georgie!

Lots of     to everyone

love cluckyxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Clucky- ET went ahead as planned. I had a 4 cell embryo, it was only 2 cell the day before so they said that was ok as they just like to see it develop, which it had.  She said it was a good one   so now I am just hoping I am lucky, whilst planning my next treatment!     OTD is 15th Feb. Not sure if I should have gone ahead, but it's too late now! It was touch and go right until they put me under 'cos the consultant nodded to the anesethetist (spelling?) behind me and she came round to my side grinning and saying "Well that's good news isn't it, we're going ahead!"  I didn't even know at that point that we might not!!    Anyway, hope you are well   

CocoRuby - I have a very good support network around me thank goodness.  My Mum and Dad came with me for EC and as the nurse wheeled me back into my room she said to my Dad "One lovely wife back!"     But tbh I don't know how I would've coped without FF. I have 11 single FF ladies coming to my house for lunch tomorrow - I thought it would be a good distraction but forgot I should be taking it easy     I hope you get your DH's travel arrangements sorted so it doesn't delay treatment    

Hope - I have two cousins and a friend who got pregnant naturally at 44, 44 and 46!  It doesn't comfort me much personally as I don't have anyone to ttc naturally with, but you are absolutely right that it proves it is possible to get pregnant at our age   So sorry to hear you have had disappointments but    this is your time    

Dark Cloud - welcome and sorry to hear about your miscarriages     Hope you can get some answers and if not that you feel strong and positive enough to try again  

Moog - all the best for your follow up      - I'm hoping that I won't regret going for EC with only one follie and keep reading your post to me!    But I just felt like I was running down a hill and couldn't stop, if that makes sense. 

Hi to everyone else - sorry for no more personals - I'm shattered and I'm supposed to be cleaning the house for my guests tomorrow!  

GIATooxx


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Dark Cloud ...









I know you have looked around many of the boards but just to double check you have had a look at the following ... 

*Peer Support (for asking fertility and treatment related questions of your fellow FFers) ~ * CLICK HERE

*Investigations & Immunology ~ *CLICK HERE

*TTC over 40 ~ *CLICK HERE

*Pregnancy loss ~ *CLICK HERE  
There are lots of sub boards which you mihgt find useful here, ie; recurrent miscarriage tests, m/c chat thread, trying again after m/c etc

Please keep posting, get some support


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

Hi ladies,
does anyone mond  if I put a link to this thread on the  ttc over 40's  board? 
I only found this thread by accident , and I'm sure there's a few others  who'd like 
to  join us?  

Luv  sue


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## armi (Sep 1, 2007)

Moog I moved your bubbles all the qway up to 5666.


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## Terry (Feb 24, 2005)

I just found this thread by accident, though some of your names seem familiar.  I've been on FF for years, though I took a year and a half away from the board until recently.  I've just had my period (on my 41st bday...great...), which is the culmination of my 12th IVF cycle which was cancelled. (I was sent home to do the dirty with DH when they realised I was ovulating early...)  My daughter, One Egg Wonder, is now almost 3 years old.  Unfortunately, I feel my regular IVF doctor has given up on me even though I went to transfer with at least 1-2 top grade embryos in cycles 1 through 10.  Cycle 11: no ET.  Cycle 12: see above.  I don't want to give up yet but I need to hear some hopeful stories from those of you who are poor responders over 40...

I'm feeling a bit despondent.

I'm wondering about taking DHEA but am worried about any permanent side effects.  Any thoughts anyone?

Incidentally, does anyone have the link to the thread for weight loss? You need special permission (which I got years ago) but I now can't find the darn thread!!!


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Terry ... *Belly Buddies: Weight loss support ~ *CLICK HERE 
Welcome back


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## susie wong (Feb 5, 2010)

hello
i am new to the site and a bit confused as to how to post stuff.need sopme advice and guidance from real women over 40
history:
started trying 39
get pregant easily
since then 3 miscarriages and one 4 month induced edwards syndrome little boy lost, that was Dec 2009, hubby sperm etc all good,visited Nott care fertility to discuss CGH but told would not respond to TX as low ovarian reserve-2. FSH very low waiting for AMH. Told to try naturally aagain buut scared we may go through another trisomy or downs and feel we are once again left outside TX support network as we not infertile. ONE GOOD EGG is all i need, should we be getting a second opinion, I am, 42 in 2 weeks time.
Really confused now, should we be happy and just reying or hacking around harley street with our life savings?
these sites have kept me going through it all and finally i have joined the debate.You are all so wonderfully supportive to each other and it is good to hear good news and feel hopeful.
sue


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## lovetoswim (Oct 26, 2009)

I really don't think the game is up at 42.  I myself got lucky with IVF (2nd attempt) at 43 and now have gorgeous DD.  It helps to believe that it can happen!

I am even having one more go right now with my own eggs (or should I say egg singular) and have just started down-regging despite being told that my chances of success are zero.  I just have to give it this last shot as I would so love to have a sibling for DD.  I have never done a long protocol (both times previously I did a short protocol) but the consultant said this might give me a better chance.  I have to admit to feeling very jittery since I started sniffing on Saturday and I am feeling cold.  Not very nice!!  I am not sure that I will be able to go all the way if I carry on feeling like this, but at the moment I do want to give it my best shot.

Best wishes to everyone x


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## fi7 (Nov 9, 2008)

Hi all

just browsing and found you all, what a lovely group you are, and i wish you all luck

I am in this race, but just wanted to those younger of you know that i had my DD at 41, so it can happen, indeed i hope it will happen again.  I have a ton of immune issues so spend most of my time on those boards, but was heartened to read some of your stories.

Dark cloud, - do check out the immune boards, i have discoverd that both age and miscarriages can cause your body to have immune issues, so definately worth investigating as although it is a journey it is solvable.

good luck and big hugs to all


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Ladies can I join you?

Just completed 1st IVF and test day was today but Mother Nature took over so it's game over this time round for me  

Have another cycle that I can take so will call the clinic today to arrange a meet with the consultant.  Don't know how I will get through the day at work.  The damn side effects of Cyclogest gave me false hope that I had been lucky 1st time round.

Does anyone know how long they like you to wait until they start you on the next cycle?

Congrats to those of you with BFP's!

Can't believe I have to go through it all again!

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - so sorry to hear about your  .  I am in exactly the same boat as you, tested this morning and got a    .  Like you I was very hopeful that I'd beat the odds and be lucky first time.  Take care of yourself and best of luck for your next cycle   

GIA Tooxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thanks Gia.  Tough at work today - trying to keep busy as nobody knows here that I had the treatment.

Waiting for the hospital to call now to arrange a follow up appointment and discuss the next cycle.

Guess we just have to keep going.

Stay in touch

Trolley


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## lovetoswim (Oct 26, 2009)

Dear Gia and Trolley

So sorry to hear your news.  

Lovetoswim
x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Ladies do any of you know how long they make you wait between cycles?  I have an appointment with my consultant next Wednesday (24th) and wondered when I can expect to start my 2nd cycle?

Looking at buying a Clearblue Fertility Monitor but they are £99 (I have to do something whilst I'm waiting) - does anyone know if they are any good?

Trolley


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## s1165 (Jan 2, 2009)

Hi Trolley

Cant advice on first question but would def buy monitor, I read (somewhere) that a fertility specialist said that is first thing people should invest in. £99 would be money very well spent if you got a natural BFP. 

Good luck


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - I think I would buy a £99 monitor if I had someone to ttc naturally with    As Sally says could end up being a lot cheaper    With regard to when you can try again, I know that my clinic (the Lister) likes you to have 2 complete cycles between treatments, which means I could start again in April.  Bit gutted about that myself, but I can understand why.  , how are you doing?    

lovetoswim - thanks hun  

AFM - Feeling much worse today personally, not helped by those who have chosen to go on to DE reminding me (just before OTD no less) of my 3-5% chance of conceiving with my own eggs!   

Hello to everyone else - keep the faith is what I say!! 

GIA Tooxx


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello everyone

GIA - so sorry to hear of your BFN.  It's so hard.  Thinking of you

Trolley - Welcome to the board.  But I'm sorry that it's at such a difficult time.  Your question re attempting another cycle... I have a feeling most clinics like you to wait for 3 months, to allow your body time to recover?  Not sure if anyone else has thoughts?

Susie Wong and Terry - good to 'meet you'.  Good luck with your journeys.

Moog, Clucky, Coco - and everyone else, sorry I know I've missed loads of you - apologies - hope you're all doing ok.  Moog, hows the no booze and caffeine going??

Lukey - thinking of you..., 

AFM - well, my 2nd IVF cycle has flown by and EC is tomorrow.  Unfortunately despite being on a lower dose this cycle, I've still over-stimmed.  At my final scan yesterday I had over 30 large follicles.  Boy I feel uncomfortable!  Whilst I'm obviously v v grateful that I still respond so well, even at 40, such a high no is really not ideal and the down side is I'm at high risk of OHSS and may have to have any embryos frozen.  But one step at a time.  Gotta get through EC first and hopefully will get some lovely embies.  Fingers crossed.

Chat again soon.  Best wishes.  CowHatGirl xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thanks for the advice Ladies! Bought myself the monitor last night.  Feel I have to be doing 'something' whilst waiting for my next cycle. Can't bear sitting and waiting any longer - it's driving me to distraction! 

Hope you're all well

Gia I hope you're ok after a rotten start to the week

Trolley


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello ladies

A quick update - EC yesterday... 17 eggs!  Clinic have just called and 16 fertilised.  Understandably delighted.  Clinic asked whether we wanted to freeze any today, but we're going to take them all to day 3 and see what the situation is then.  

Hope everyone is ok?  Trolley, GIA - thinking of you both.

Best wishes, CowHatGirl x


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Cowhatgirl - just wanted to say that's brilliant news on your eggs and fertilisation          

Trolley - glad you bought the monitor     

GIA Tooxx 
I'm still feeling


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Congratulations Cowhatgirl that's fab!

Trolley


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning Ladies hope you are all having a good weekend!

Feeling better today than I did this time last week    Worst Valentine's Day ever!

Looking forward to Wednesday when I see my consultant to book in 2nd cycle and I've booked myself some acupuncture too which starts on March 6th.  With all this and a fertility monitor on the go no-one can accuse me of not trying!

Enjoy your Sunday!

Trolley


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## simone hart (Jul 6, 2009)

Just marking


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

hi ya  all 

Not alot to report , consalt 5th March  for  chat about DE and bloods  SA
Was told  might need  mamagramme  if  tx doesnt start by my 45 birthday. Will have to have it via 
BUPA  I  guess ,  nhs  wont do it  
Need  smear test  too, had reminder letter , they cant get mein till 19th March.


Trolley  -  Glad ya feeling better now . Aww just one more day till ya consalt  app. Tell me  more  about this fertility monitor ?
                cowhatgirl mentioned a 3 month wait till next  tx, apart from giving ya body a rest , its  good to give your emotions
                a time to regroup too 

cowhatgirl  thats  great ! nice  'clutch' of eggs ,  and  16  of 17 fertilised  ! Not ong till ya see the day 3 survivors


Sending love and  hugs to everyone else, sorry I'm not  too good  at this .

Luv sue


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Ladies,

Appointment with my consultant today at 12 so let's see what that brings!

Sue the CB fertility monitor has proved interesting already.  It is saying that I ovulate at a different time to what the hospital told me last year - let's see . . . I had heard so many good things about it that I had to buy one.

GIA - I hope you're feeling a little brighter.  This whole process is such a rollercoaster . . . 

I have acupuncture booked on March 6th which will be cool!

Hope you Ladies are all well!

Trolley


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Had my appointment. . . Not great news I'm afraid . . . the consultant has come to the conclusion that I have low egg reserves which is why it isn't happening  There is nothing they can do as every women is born with a batch that are slowly released each month until you have none which is when you go through the menopause - I didn't know this. He tried to put us off the 2nd cycle saying our chances are only 2-3% of success but we said that we want it anyway. He wants us to start straight away so I have to call on March 5th to book in but they need to see if they have room for me - if not I will be booked for my next cycle in April. Instead of starting the injections on Day 21 of next cycle he wants me to start them on Day 2 therefore giving me the highest dose possible right at the start rather than trying to boost at the end when it's almost too late (which is what they did the last time). We can only try - I don't know what I'm feeling or how to feel - I have acupuncture booked too now starting on March 6th to coincide with the treatment but not sure what it will do.

Hope that you are all having a better day 
Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Oh Trolley - I'm sorry it wasn't better news for you today      I'm no expert but at least he is trying something different with you next time.

You might want to post on the Poor Responders thread to get some more ideas about what else you could do differently.  A lot of clinics don't seem to be able to work with poor responders and then you go to another clinic (like Jinimed or Lister) and they manage to make dreams come true.  It may be worth posting on those cllinics threads too to see if anyone has been in a similar situation to you?  Some women respond badly first IVF then much better second time round with some tweaks to the protocol.

Sorry I can't be more help. I am struggling myself - keep changing my mind about what I want to do next - because of financial reasons and "not getting any younger" reasons!! But remember the other good thing going for you is that you have a partner and lots of women seem to get pg naturally even with low amh or low ovarian reserve.  Stay positive if you can, as it's not the end of the line for you.  Maybe, if you can, start saving in case you need to go to a private clinic like the Lister in the future.

Take care   
GIA Tooxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thanks GIA!  Your words mean a lot!

By the way Ladies has anyone heard if taking aspirin is a good thing to do - I heard today that it is meant to thicken the womb lining?

Trolley


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi there,

I hope everyone is ok.  I was posting on this thread for a while but it went quiet and the ladies who were 'regulars' seem to have disappeared...where are you girls??!

Trolley, was sorry to hear about your appointment and that the consultant seemed quite negative.  I have read lots of stories like yours and agree that a clinic more experienced in treating slightly older ladies might be the way to go.  The Lister I think are good, although they are busy - but that must be a good sign!

Hi GIA, I hope you are feeling a little bit more certain about your next move.  Money is a huge issue for many people, I know it is for us although DH worries more than me - I would just throw the cost on a card and pay it off when we can but he is much more cautious unfortunately 

I was green when I heard about your 17 eggs cowhat girl! A great result for you, how did you do it?!

As for me, I am currently downregging, am on day 3.  My 1st IVF was back in August and I am now being reminded of the rollercoaster of emotions that all the drugs, including the cp, bring.  I am dreading stimming, it gets worse for me (and DH) then!  I had a scan last week to check all was ok and it looks like I have a cyst - great.  So I am hoping on my next scan on Tuesday that it will have gone so I can get on with stimming  

Hello to Harris, Lukey, Fi, Clucky and Georgie - where are you lovely ladies?!  I hope you are all well, you have all had a lot to deal with   
x


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hi all

Coco - great to hear from you.  Pleased you've started again.  Wishing you every success with this cycle.  It's daunting going through it again isn't it?  But let's hope our efforts are rewarded.  Very best of luck to you.  

Trolley - apologies, I've no experience of your difficulties so feel ill equipped to offer any valuable advice.  The recommendation to post on the poor responders board seems like a good one though.  Thinking of you.

GIA - how are you?  Hope you're doing ok.

Sue - good luck for your app on the 5th March.  Hope its a good day for both of us (OTD for me).

Hi to everyone else.  As Coco said, when I first posted on the board a few weeks ago there were lots of you... hope you're all ok.  Lukey - thinking of you...

Coco and others, thanks so much for your support and positive thoughts re my cycle.  I'd love to say I've done something special to achieve this level of response, but tbh, I've not.  Just eaten well, laid off the booze, Pregnacare supplements and plenty of water and milk.  The consultant said it is above ave. for my age, so suspected I was either just blessed with being born with loads of eggs,  or I've not used them?  Who knows?  Anyway, the cycle continued to go well.  Of the 16 eggs fertilised, all 16 continued to develop to day 3 so at ET they were able to select the pick of the bunch.  And we decided to try to take the remaining embryos to blast before freezing, so now have 6 first grade blasts on ice.  Hurrah!  And officially mid way through the madness of the 2ww.  

CowHatGirl x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Ladies I hope you're having a good weekend.  Mine is quiet - I had my hair done yesterday which brightened me up but DH is working today so I'm having a lazy'ish' dish which is sadly giving me too much time to think!

Got my letter from the hospital yesterday and they have detailed my next cycle.  This time they are going for a 'short down regulation' where I start the Buserelin, Puregon & Menopur all on Day 2 for 12 days followed by ET a couple of days later.  Has anyone ever had their cycle planned this way?

Intrigued to know . . . if the hospital has room to fit me in I will be starting on March 13th/14th.

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi Trolley
Can't help you on the short protocol as I've only done one cycle and it was long protocol.  But I wanted to ask;  does that mean that you are starting straight away (i.e. next cycle) after your last one?? Oh good luck hun      

Hi Cowhatgirl  - how you doing? Hope you're not going too     

Coco - I hope you're cycst goes before next scan and you get going with stimming.     

Harris, Lukey, Fi, Clucky, Georgie and anyone else lurking    Hope you're all ok?  

AFM - I am beginning to feel like my old self and interested in things other than IF!!    Having said that, I was very excited to get an email from Dogus clinic in Cyprus to say that they are expecting the law to change in March so that they willbe able to treat single women and I could then dothe tandem cycle with them and Jinimed (I think the law inTurkey will be changing as it's legal in Cyprus). So I'm quite excited that it may actually be an option for me.  But I will see what the Lister says at my follow up.  

Take care everyone  
GIA Tooxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi GIA yes.  My AF was on 14th February and I'm starting on Day 2 of next cycle which should be on 12th March.  Not sure if that's a good thing!?!

Good news on the laws changing!

Have a good week girls!!

Trolley


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## fi7 (Nov 9, 2008)

hello all

sorry i have not been so good at posting, not on too often and tend to lurk on the LIT and immune boards as i am pinning my hope on that being our issue!

trolley - i have been on the 75 aspirin for a couple of years now, they seem to think it can help with lining and does no harm. sorry about your appt, i had a friend who had two rounds of IVF a couple of years back and with PGS - pre embryo screening,  she had no transfers as every embryo was faulty and she was told to give up and that she was looking for a needle in a haystack.  A year later she gave birth to a healthy boy after a natural conception.  so my view is that your body is pretty good at miracles.

cowhatgirl - fab news on your embies, i am green but delighted for you.

Goitalone - i hope things go well for you

hi to all you other lovely ladies 

Fi


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thanks Fi!  Well 2nd cycle all booked in.  AF due on the 12th so scan booked for the 13th with injections due to start same day (Day 2).

EC planned for w/c 22nd March - wish me luck with this short down regulation girls please!!!  

Hope you're all well!?!

Trolley


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## ElsieF (Nov 26, 2009)

hi everyone,
I have just joined the forum - and it is great to see so many stories. particularly the successes! 

GIA - I hope you are feeling better. I totally sympathise with you. I tried a couple of attempts of IUI at a clinic in Denmark when I was single a few years ago. (I went to Denmark because as a recipient you get lots of info about the donors, however they stay anonymous unless you both agree otherwise.) I remember how lonely it felt especially travelling and in the clinic, but I also remember supportive friends and my determination! You know it is going to be worth it in the end!
I think we need lots of laws to change, here's hoping they get round to it quickly!

ecf


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

I am sorry for the limited personals today but I need a good hour or so to catch up with your stories and I am under a bit of pressure at work.

Clucky - I spotted that you had done another cycle - hope that went okay - keeping my fingers crossed for you.  How are things?

Georgie - well, was hoping for the 20 egg cycle as always, but you and I don't have many left, do we..... hope u are feeling okay .

Coco - good to see you are still posting, and I am anxiously waiting the outcome of your cycle.  Please keep us updated.

Harris - would love to hear an update on your pregnancy

Lukey - what will be next for you love?

I am still waiting on my partner to decide what he wants to do - he clams up every time I talk about DE but I really think this is the best way forward for us.  My ovarian reserve is so low that I am unlikey to get more than one egg each time, so the cost of us achieving a baby is going be another 50K with a 50:50 chance of losing it.  I do feel sad, but what is worse really for me is the not moving forward.  DP says he will ask his parents if they will lend money but he hasn't been to see them since xmas and is reluctant to go as his mum always has a go at him for not going (I know, ironic, isn't it).

So, welcome all the newcomers, good to see this thread being kept alive - I spotted that Cowgirl may have some news for us.

Will catch up again soon....

Fiona


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi all,

It's quite quiet on this thread so thought I'd better put fingers to keyboard and maybe start it moving again.

Trolley, how are you getting along with the downregging, are you stimming at the mo - probably not just yet? Hope it goes ok.

Cowhatgirl, where are you in the 2ww, hope everything is going well!

GIA, have you made an appt for your next tx or are you waiting for a while.

Hi Georgie, Lukey and Clucky if you are still there!!  

Hi Fi    Great to hear from you.  I'm sorry your dh is taking his time coming round to your point of view. Did you have any luck persuading DH's family to help you out with another oe tx?  Have you done any research into where you would go for de, if that's what you decide?  Lots of questions!  I have so many regarding myself, I think that's one of the hardest things about IF, the not knowing and constant 'what if's'.

Afm, I had my tests and started downregging two weeks ago.  I'm currently stimming, on day 9 of 375 menopur - I only realised the other day that this is the next-to-highest dose the clinic will give you - have been feeling a bit sick and dizzy and quite bloated, I guess that's due to the drug and the high dosage? I had a scan yesterday and had three small (under 10mm) follies on right ovary which is my worst one, I was amazed there were any!  She counted 3 over 10mm and 4 or 5 smaller ones on my left side so am    like mad that I can get a good crop this time!  Have another scan on Thursday so keeping everything crossed.  Poor right hand ovary hurts like mad - it must be squeezing out the last few follies it has left  

One weird thing from my bloods was my amh result.  My fsh was 7.2 back in June last year, it's now 8.5 which I thought wasn't too bad considering my age?  But my amh back then was 2.6 and the tests from a month ago show it is 5.7 now!!    I'm not sure I've ever heard of amh rising but I am hoping it is a good sign!!

I hope you are all well - babydust to all!  
xx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Hi there,

Georgie here.  Maybe we elusive ones are crawling out from hibernation at long last.  Same as Fee, I'm afraid.  Won't do personals until I'm up to speed with everyone.  Welcome to everyone new on this lovely thread.

However, quick hello and     to Coco, Clucky and Fee.  

Coco, I sent you a PM yesterday.  Hope you got it ok.  Your crop sounds fab.  Your are the only one on this thread who seems to be getting younger!  What is your secret?  Have you been at the DHEA??  Perhaps we should all have our AMHs done again.  Sadly for me it was not to be this time.  Abandoned cycle despite initially having 6 follies.  One big sodding ring-leader squashed all the rest so I sacked it last Friday.  Have been trying to make use of it though.  Have been at it like rabbits over the last 2 days, as God himself intended... that and a F*** off trigger injection.  You never know. Miracles seem to happen, they say.  Watch this space.

Must go to bed now but will catch up again soon.

Lots of love

Georgie xxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Well done CocoRuby!  Good luck for the scan tomorrow!

Waiting for AF any day now to call the hospital - plan is to go in on Day 2 (Saturday) and start on Sunday with Buserelin, Menopur & Puregon - what a cocktail!  Where did the Margarita's go?

Started acupuncture last Saturday and having the next session this Saturday - worth a go!

Sorry about your cycle Georgie  

Nice to hear from you all - have a good Wednesday!

Trolley


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Evening 

Hello Trolley.  Good luck for Sunday   Do you take menopur and puregon together?  I didn't know that clinics mixed the two, is there a reason for that??  Do you find that acupuncture helps?  I tried it on one or two of my clomid cycles - have to be honest, I just got bored lying there and kept thinking of all the things I should have been doing instead!  Probably not the whole idea of relaxing and enjoying it and I know lots of people swear by it 

Hi Georgie - good to hear from you!  I did get your lovely PM and send you an email in reply - hope you received that?!  I'm sorry though to hear about your runaway follie    It seems you took the right course of action by jumping (repeatedly!) on dh and giving yourself the best chance this cycle.  Do you plan to have another go soon?  

I'm not sure what's happened to my amh - it's actually 5.9, I checked the results again today.  I'm just taking it as a positive sign at the moment!  I haven't taken dhea, I don't know much about it apart form it lowers fsh - but I think mine is ok at 8.5 (not great but ok for almost 43 I think?).

I'm a bit nervous about my scan tomorrow, I'm just hoping I have some nicely developed follies - with good quality eggs!!!

Best wishes to all
xx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Coco - Just a quickie to wish you good luck with your scan tomorrow.     8.5fsh is good hun  

Trolley - hope AF arrives on time so you can get going    

Georgie - sorry about your cycle but hope the   worked!    

Hi to everyone else

I've got my follow-up tomorrow   - I'll report back tomorrow.

night
GIA Too xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Ladies,

CocoRuby - on my 1st cycle they gave me just Menopur and the result was 'OK' but not great so it was boosted with Puregon which made a huge difference.  That's why this time I'm getting the 2 together right from the start.  It's quite common to get both.

Thanks GIAToo!  My fertility monitor told me to go for it last weekend so I'm kind of hoping that I might get a miracle  

Have a good day Ladies and roll on the weekend!

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - I'll pray for a miracle for you too     I'm going to ask about Puregon at my f/u today - just added it to my mammoth list of questions!!  

 and   to everyone
GIATooxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi

Thanks Trolly, I didn't know that about combining the two drugs...I think it may have been an option for me, had I known to ask!

Hi GIA, are you planning your next tx?  Where are you going?

Hello to Fi, Georgie, and anyone else  

Not that great news for me am afraid.  Went for a scan today as planned.  I think I had allowed myself to build up my hopes of having 8 or more follies and was even daydreaming about the possibility of FET,if necessary...stupid me!...Well, that all fell apart as I only have 4 follies over 10mm...plus three or four tiddlers that just aren't going to catch up   I know it's not the end of the world (as long as there are eggs in the existing follies!   ) but I was so disappointed, felt like crying when the sonographer told me.  Then the nurse really hurt me taking blood so that made me feel worse!

EC is booked for Monday - they don't even want to see me for another scan between now and then, which I find a bit strange? - so am trying to remain positive    It's our last go with oe - we just cannot afford to do another one - so have to keep my +ve head on...

Love to all
x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Bubbles77 that was what happened to me the last time - that is why I was given Puregon in addition to the menopur and it boosted the size overnight and in the end iIhad 17.  Can't you ask them Honey?

Trolley


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## Guest (Mar 12, 2010)

Just a quick one for Coco - HONESTLY I have had my best results with fewer follies - my pregnancy with only one of course....don't be disheartened    - you are still well in there with a chance!    

BTW on the mixed drugs thing - I've done the lot - together/separate/different doses etc etc and tbh it made little difference - the trouble is you don't know what you would have got on that cycle with something different IYSWIM as every cycle is naturally different too - it could have all worked out the same...but for some of course it may help - we just can't prove it 

Reading every now and then....

xxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning Girls!

No sign of AF yet.

Well the pineapple juice and brazil nuts are going well - a big glass of juice with breakfast and 5 nuts as an afternoon snack - I'm willing to try anything!

Got a call yesterday and my friends daughter has gone into labour.  Got another call last night to be told a friend is 3 months PG - what a day!

Roll on acu tomorrow to chill me out.  I will need it as we are at the in-laws this weekend and my Mother is Law is a 'treat'!

Trolley


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## cowhatgirl (Aug 12, 2008)

Hello everyone

Just a quick update from me.  Got a BFP on the 5th March, confirmed by blood test on the 8th.  So now onto the next phase of anxiety... waiting for the results of the first scan.  Obviously we feel really happy and lucky to have had success again, but our experience last year means we are very cautious and know that we have a long, long way to go.  Sad really, that we can't just enjoy the fact that I'm pregnant and the prospect that we may have a baby.  But that's what this journey does to you I guess.

Coco - good luck with your cycle.  Really hope it works out for you.  Still plenty of reasons to be positive.

Trolley - Hope you too have success.  Shall be following your progress...

Hi to everyone else.  Lukey, pleased to see you posting.  Hope you're doing ok.

Best wishes, CowHatGirl x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Congratulations Cowhatgirl!

AF arrived to day so I will start my 2nd cycle tomorrow - wish me luck please!!!

Hope you all have a good week!

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Congratulations CowHatGirl on your     I hope it all goes wonderfully smoothly from here on     

Trolley - Good luck with your cycle      

Hi Lukey    Hope you had a nice weekend  

Coco Ruby -   you got some lovely eggs today!    

AFM - just trying to decide what to do next.  Had follow-up, 8% chance of success with OE. Have added my name to waiting lists at Reprofit (Donor Egg and Donor Embryo) as they are quite long, just in case.  GP not paying for any more drugs (was told would get three cycles worth, but hey ho).  AF due on Wed, so if I go again at the lister will start down regging in approx 21 days  .  Haven't decided yet though, trying not to rush any decisions whilst feeling impatient  .

Take care everyone and Hi to anyone I've missed  
GIA Tooxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi all

Firstly, congrats on your bfp cowhatgirl!  Great odds with all those eggs and it turned out really well!...I know what you mean that it's too hard relax after the bfp, there is so much to worry about!  You have done so well to get your bfp though, take it easy on yourself as much as you can 

Hi Lukey, thanks for your lovely message   How are you?  I hope you and dh are ok   

Hi Fi!!  How are things with you?  Will txt or email tomorrow! 

Best of luck with the next tx Trolley  

Hi GIA.  Its a hard decision to make isn't it, another go with oe or de?  8% seems a strange percentage to give you?   I did think that 40 - 42 age group had up to 25% chance per ivf  (I think I got this from the Lister website) but of course I am not a doctor!    Best of luck deciding your next steps  

Well, I had egg collection today, I manged to get 5 eggs collected (I had 4 main follies at my last scan on Thursday so one must have caught up a bit!).  I am just   that they are all mature and   even more that they all fertliize!!  I'll get a call from the lab tomorrow so really hoping for good news.

I know I am supposed to be eating healthily but have had a truck load of chocolate today    Will try harder for the next two weeks or so!
Love to all,
xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Great news CocoRuby and hope you're not too tender today!   that they call with great news for you today!

Have my appointment at 1130 today for my scan and to collect my meds.  Hope this short protocol works - this is our last go so have a lot riding on the next couple of weeks.

Last couple of days have been weird and I've been feeling tearful - not sure if it's AF making me upset of the anticipation.

Trolley


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Evening 

Trolley, I hope you are feeling a little less tearful today    I have found that all the drugs and the uncertainty of tx makes me extremely emotional - one minute I am tripping along the clouds, the next I'm sinking to the bottom of the deep stormy sea.  My poor dh has had to suffer my irrational moods and whims    although he says I am always like that    How did your scan go?  Best of luck with this tx hun  

Georgie, am hoping you had a good result from your bms this cycle  

Hi Fi!!

GIA, have you come to any decision yet?  It's a tough one.  Have you narrowed your choices down or still wading through next steps? 

How are you feeling cowhatgirl, any symptoms of early pregnancy coming through yet?  I bet you are still on cloud 9!  

Quick update from me - had 3 eggs txfered today, 2 x 4 cell and 1 x 6 cell (that the consultant thinks is developing too quickly) but they are all grade 1, which I was pleased about. I've been at home relaxing on the sofa with my hot water bottle, watching crummy tv and reading - now the 2ww begins! 

Love to all
x


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - good luck for your second cycle         

Coco - how exciting! Congratulations on being PUPO!!       Take it easy on that sofa and don't OD on cr*p telly!  

Just a quickie from me - spoke to the consultant at the Lister and he said he would do whatever I wanted, so I asked to do the Flare protocol and change from Menopur to Gonal F.  I'm sure it's all psychological as who knows how I would've responded on exactly the same protocol, but that's what I'm doing.  This might sound a bit crass (I always feel it's crass when I talk about the sperm I bought!), but if it doesn't work this time, I am thinking I will do 2 natural IUIs just to use up the sperm I have left ('cos you never know and it's the single girls equivalent to ttc au-natural  ) and then move to DE.  I have asked to be put on the waiting list for DE and DEmbryo at Reprofit and just need to complete the forms at the weekend,  My first choice (currently) clinic for DE has no waiting list.

HI to everyone else - sorry for lack of PMs, got to get to bed, had a headache all day - oh and AF is a bit late   Typical!  

Night all  
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hello ladies,

Can I join you please?  I'm starting my 3rd ICSI in April/May and suddenly find myself having to look at the over 40's threads as I'll be 40 in May!

My first two ICSI's were bfp's, but both sadly ended in mc - the last one was in January and was a mmc.  I've had my follow-up at Bart's and they have done blood tests for recurrent mc, which we are waiting for results from.  They don't plan to change my protocol as I respond well (14 eggs first time, and 17 the second time), but they are considering putting me on steroids on the next cycle.

I can see that most of you on here have had your own journeys, so for me, it is great to be in a place with people who know how I feel right now - scared and excited!

Looking forward to sharing the journey with you  

Sezy
xxxx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Hello,

Just returned from the Mother-in Law in Wales for the last few days (lovely actually!) and wanted to say a quick hello to everyone and a HUGE WELL DONE to you Coco.      3 great sounding embies.  I am so pleased for you.  Don't forget the age old 40's thread mantra... keep those feet warm.  Best of luck with your 2ww.  I really hope you can keep positive and think yourself preggers.        .

Not done a test myself yet but think that the bms has not produced the goods.  No surprises there.  Have made the giant leap into our next plan.  Madrid here we come.  Am feeling ok about it at the moment.

Take care everyone... oh, and hello and a big welcome to Sezy.  Great thread here.  You have picked the right one, although we all hate you for still being in your 30's.  Make the most of it before the fun really begins!!  You sound like you have a great response to the treatments though so I wish you every success in the coming year.

Lots of love,  Georgie xxx


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## Guest (Mar 19, 2010)

Georgie - great you have made your plans!! - good for you! Loads of luck   

Brilliant news Coco! hope the next few weeks brings good news   

xxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Thank you Georgie!  I've only got 7 weeks left of being in my 30's!  And we'll be just getting going again literally over my 40th birthday!!  I'm shocked at how quickly this has come round - its like when and how the heck did THAT happen  I keep hoping that my mum n dad tell me that they got it all wrong and that I'm actually a couple of years younger! (I kid you not, this actually happened to a friend of mine recently - we celebrated her 40th last year....and then she found out that some mistake had been made on her birth certificate, or something, and so we celebrated her 40th again this year   )

Well, everyone on here seems very upbeat and supportive, which is what I need right now - after bad experienced, its so easy to end up feeling despondent and like it will never happen.  But I get a really good vibe from the girls on here, so i know I'm in the right place  

Hopefully, I'll start DR on 1 May - which is a bit strange because that is the date of my first loss last year...so busy building up the PMA now, not always easy!

THanks again ladies,

Sezy
xxxxxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Girls - well my age is biting me on the backside again and I'm feeling slightly panicked.

Started 2nd IVF (albeit SP this time) on Day 2 (Tuesday) and got my FSH result today which was 10 which I was told is 'borderline'.

I understand that this means my ovaries need all the help that they can get and I am on the highest dosage of Menopur & Puregon together so fingers crossed.

Does anyone have any experience with this?

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - my FSH was 11 and I was on the highest dose of Menopur.  Didn't have Puregon, but have read of success stories with that mix so good luck   

Hi Sezy - I think we have "met" recently on the American website Fertility Over 40 - my name on there is JW1968.  Whether we have or not, welcome here    I'm glad you are already feeling supported from the ladies here    I hope the steroids makes a big difference to your outcome next time 'round    

Georgie - glad you're feeling ok and have made plans for your next steps    

Hi Lukey    & everyone else!  

GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

GIA Too - yes, we have 'met' on the the fertility over 40 forum!  I was wondering if any of the UK ladies from there would be on here    I like that site because its specifically aimed at our age group, but its not always very busy - there always seems to be something going on here!

Good luck to all of us!

Sezy
xxxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Well, now I have a little time, I am trying to catch up with all your stories.

Firstly, welcome Sezy    I am sorry to hear that both your pregnancies ended in miscarriage - unfortunately, it is a sad fact of our age that 50% end in miscarriage and therefore 25% of us will have two miscarriages.  However, your outlook is really really good.  It is only a question of time before the golden egg is found with the number of eggs you produce.

Trolley - I see you also produce good numbers and that you have had a previous pregnancy - again a good sign for the future.  An FSH of 10 is fine - more importantly it is how you respond to the drugs and you respond great, so let's hope the golden egg is in this batch.

Gia - gosh, this is a hard road for you - I find it hard with a partner ... I hope you have lots of support around you.  I was single until I was 38 .... only met my dh (well dp to be correct) after changing jobs.  I wish you all the luck in the world .... 

Moog, how are you? any future plans?

Lukey - great to see you back again - have you started any DE plans?

Clucky - I was hoping to read a positive outcome but it has all gone quiet - how are you?

Georgie - wow - I am really exited for you.  DE is a very difficult thing to accept, but once you are there, really it is so much more hopeful than with our own eggs.  And let's face it, even if you have your own children it is a lottery as to what you get.  My sister has got three - one angel, one sweet girl, and the devil child.  And my partner and his mother are like a match with petrol when they get together.....

Coco - well done on being PUPO - I am praying for you - THREE grade one's is excellent though - and remember the stats I told you about - now all you need is lady luck on your side.

AFM - well, am on the road to treatment again now.  DP can't move on to DE just yet it would appear.  Personally I wish he would tell me to give it up and persuade me into DE because I really think that it is the end of the road for us with own eggs.  My poxy ovaries are squeezing out the last few eggs with a terrible struggle and with the most likely outcome just one egg again (god forbid the negative outcome of none!) I just don't see much point.  Sorrry, being a bit depressing.  Anyhow, I suppose the upside is that I will know for sure that I have given it my best shot and I will have no regrets.  I just worry that DP will never accept DE?...

I took my last pill yesterday so hopefully starting on drugs around Thursday - they don't seem to make rocket FSH  which is what I need.

Anyway, got to phone my mum - take care and babydust to us all



Fee
xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thank you Fee - the support on your post meant a lot  

Trolley


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Thank you Fee for your lovely welcome!  Yep, the nasty ol' mc stats aren't in our favour, but I'm certainly not giving up on my own eggs until the clinic tells me its time to move onto DE, which I have already thought about and am quite happy with - but, since they've yet to mention my age and seem fairly confident, I think I may have a few shots yet!

Loving the energy on this board!

Sezy
xxxxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Evening everyone,

Hi Georgie - great to hear from you   I am hoping your bms has had the desired effect but I'm so pleased to hear that you've made the leap to de, good for you!  What made you choose Madrid?  I've heard good things about some of the clinics there though, so I'm sure their excellent reputation was a factor.  Am so pleased for you and dh - and how exciting!

Hello Sezy, sneaking in at a youthful 39 and with a bumper crop of eggs!    It sounds like you have been really unfortunate so far with your tx but I am sure with your great egg reserve that you will get there and it's just a matter of time - easy to say though, I know    And I agree, I think you have a few goes in you before you have to even think about de 

Hi Fi!  Good news about having another go with oe.  I do understand your worries about having low egg collection during this tx - but you just don't know what could happen     And I guess that the bit of space that this tx will give dh might just be the time he needs to think about the possibility of de...NOT that you will need it!   

Hello lovely Lukey    How are you?  Have you made any decisions about your next steps?  

Hi Gia, hope you are well  

Hi Trolley, I think an fsh of 10 is ok, certainly not a catastrophe.  I have read so many stories of ladies with fsh levels several times higher than yours and then going on to have a baby so I would try not to panic!  

Hello Clucky and Harris - are you both ok?  It would be lovely to hear from you both  

Not a lot happening with me at the moment - I am obsessively monitoring myself for any symptoms!  I can't say I have a lot though - I am quite hungry (but I put that down to natural greed   ), have been tired ( natural laziness   ) and have quite a lot of af pains on and off, which is the thing that is worrying me the most.  I keep thinking af is on its way, but surely it's a little early for that?!  It's probably my body going back to 'normal' after the onslaught of the cocktail of drungs I've been injecting into it over the last few weeks is all...

xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning gils and thanks CocoRuby  

Off for my scan at 1200 (eek!)  I'm  for a good result and EC on Friday or Saturday as my employers don't know and it would really help!!

Hope you are all doing OK today - sorry for lack of personals but have to dash off to work now.

Trolley


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Trolley,

   for your scan and for EC plans.  Wishing you lots of healthy happy eggies.  PS  FSH of 10 is fine.  The lister don't even check FSH every cycle.  They have had pregnancies with FSHs up to 30!!!

Coco... symptom watching is just the pits isn't it.  I do feel for you.  I have to say, my last couple of cycles were so much easier to deal with when I carried on life as normal, went to work etc.  Time just seemed to go by quicker... although I didn't find myself feeling my boobs rather too often in front of my patients... .  I'm surprised I wasn't sacked for perverted behaviour.  I am thinking about you such a lot.  BFP please 

Sezy... you are quite right not to be thinking about DE yet.  Good to have positive thoughts about it in the very back of your mind but in your position (being a spring chicken and all that ) and with your history, I would say you have a great chance.  Keep going that girl.  

Fi.. hello my lovely friend (and also, my rock).  I look forward to hearing about your next crop.  May it surprise the hell out of you and give you a good yeild this time.  I am here for you always.

Lukey... BIG HELLO  

GIA Too - Hi there,  Good luck with your flare protocol.  I found the Lister brilliant.  If it going to work anywhere, it will work there.  When do you start?

AFM  Awaiting cotact from IVI madrid.  Watch this space.  Am excited in one way but pretty ratty most of the time at the moment so I guess that is the subconcious grieving process going on (or just natural bad-temperedness, to use a Coco expression!!)  Hopefully it will pass soon and I will become cute lovable Georgie again   

Have a good day everyone

Georgie xxx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Sorry Coco,

Didn't answer your questions.

 failed miserably.  AF reared her ugly head yesterday. Also, I didn't really chose IVI Madrid.  My lovely consultant in Salisbury knows the professor there and he said he would only want me to go there if I went abroad.  Good enough recommendation for me.  He will also look after me for the scans etc so it is prudent to go with his advice I feel.  I have since looked up IVI and they seem to have a fab reputation with as good stats as anywhere.  Care Nottingham are also linked with IVI.

Anyway... I don't want to talk DE with you.  You are not going to need it   .  You are going to have a good result so just you cocentrate on growing that little bean (or beanies ).



Georgie x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thank you Georgie 

Well they found 10 follies - 5 are good, 3 are 'OK' and 2 are tiny.  Next scan on Friday and EC on Monday.

Not sure how I feel . . . .

Trolley


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thank you Georgie 

Well they found 10 follies - 5 are good, 3 are 'OK' and 2 are tiny.  Next scan on Friday and EC on Monday.

Not sure how I feel . . . .

Trolley


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

That is fantastic Trolley.  You are not really 41 are you  .  Most of us are struggling to get 1 good one so you have done brilliantly.  I understand you may feel a bit unsure if you got 17 before but please think quality, not quantity.  You have a good potential for 8 eggs. It is so much better to have fewer good quality eggs.  

just keep relaxing and looking after yourself until monday. 

Take it easy

Georgie xxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Thank you for your welcomes CocoRuby (fingers crossed for you!) and Georgie 

Was feeling a bit down and despondent earlier, but feeling much better now I've checked in here.

Trolley, you have a great number of eggs and the others are right, its all about quality at the end of the day.  I got 17 last time - out of those 9 fertilised and we were hoping to go to blasto, but on day three only 3 embies had made it, and so we did et that day.  So its not about the numbers; and besides, lots can happen between now and Friday!  Got everything crossed for you  

xxxxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Georgie & Sezy - thank you SO much and I know you're right.  I am just panicking as the days gets closer.

It's people like you that get us all through this game! 

Trolley


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hello 

Thanks for the encouragement Georgie, I need it at the moment!  Great that your consultant recommended the clinic for you, I think it's a really good idea to go with what he recommends.  What stage are you at, have you been in touch with them?  Have you seen a list of potential donor matches yet?    It's so exciting!!

Congrats Trolley on a fab crop of follies - I think Georgie is right, you are 31 not 41 really    Seriously, hope all goes well and best of luck with your scan tomorrow.

Hi Fi - how are you hon?  I hope you are looking after yourself in preparation for stimms in a few days  

Hi Sezy  

Not feeling too great today girls.  Have no symptoms at all, apart from keep bursting into tears    Good job am not at work today!  I know everyone says have a pma, but I am fairly certain it hasn't worked - I feel different to last time. OTD is Monday but I shall test Sunday so that I am in a 'better' frame of mind for work on Monday.  Sorry to be miserable, just really down today  

Hope you are all ok
xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Coco Ruby - Stay positive hon, I had no/very few symptoms with both my BFP's, and although they didn't end in the result I wanted, I did loads of research and found that not everyone gets symptoms; in fact i learned that 20-50% of women never experience any sickness or nausea, and it many cultures around the world they don't even have a word or expression for it because it just doesn't exist!  And I found loads of women who get no symptoms at all throughout their pregnancy.  Oh, and being very emotional is a symptom!  So sit tight!  Keeping everything crossed for you  

Trolley - don't you have a scan tomorrow?  Hope all those follies have carried on developing 

Well, I've just had a scan today to check that everything is OK inside after my mmc in January.  All looks well, and the the results of the level 1 MC tests that they have back so far are all OK (just waiting for lupus and chromosome results), and the day 2 FSH that I had done a couple of weeks ago came back at 4.9!!  So all looking good so far    DH is in for TESE/PESA in a couple of weeks, and we should be starting our 3rd cycle about 3 weeks later (cd21, LP).  So starting to get just a little bit excited now!

How is everyone else doing?

xxxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

CocoRuby - I'm not going to say stay positive as you are probably at the stage where you are SO over hearing that . . . However, don't forget that no 2 pregnancies are the same Hun.  I did the same as you last time as I was due to test on a Monday morning and didn't want to have to go into work straight afterwards regardless of the result.

Sezy - yes scan tomorrow - eek!  Am SO bloated and have put on 5lbs since last Tuesday!  Roll on EC!  Congrats on your results - fabulous!

Georgie - thanks again for the positive note and making me feel good about my 8 Easter Eggs!  Just need to work on thickening the womb lining as the nurse documented it as 'thin'.  Still on the pineapple juice, brazil nuts and hot water bottle so lets see what tomorrow brings!

Hope all you other ladies are doing OK today - almost the weekend!

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Coco Ruby - as Sezy says, no symptoms means nothing at all      I know it's hard to stay positive, but take care of yourself and don't be hard on yourself for not having a perfect pma! It will come and go if you're anything like me - usually changing every half an hour!     I loved your bit about "natural greed" and "natural laziness", I thought "that's me!!"  

Sezy - great news about all your test results so far!! And exciting that you have a time to start next cycle.  All the best to your DH for the TESA/PESA   

Trolley - that's a fab number of follies!      Let's hope they all grow to a decent size     And don't forget the title of this thread!!  

Georgie - well done on making the connection with IVI.  I think it is natural to grieve and that may manifest itself in bad temperedness (not sure what excuse I can use once all this IVF stuff is over and done with!! - I know! Exhaustion from not enough sleep!  )  Do IVI have a long waiting list?  Very excited for you   

Fee - you say it is hard for me, but at least I can make all the decisions myself and don't have to worry about anyone else (when considering next steps etc)    It must be very difficult for you.  Anyway, did you have a scan today?? Let us know how you got on    BTW I change jobs approx every 6 months and still no luck finding Mr Right!               Mr Right-Now would do occasionally   

AFM - have my pill scan next Thursday. Have good days and bad days.  On bad days I find it difficult, as I'm sure we all do, to be happy for anyone who's pregnant tbh and I feel bad for saying it.  And on some bad days I go into a total panic about what I am doing (doing this alone etc) and feel too old and tired already!  I also keep thinking, maybe I should just go straight for DE, but the sensible side of me says I should give it at least one more go on a different protocol with my OE.  You never know eh?  
The good days are when I am too busy thinking about other things to worry!!  

Take care everyone  
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Gia, I can so relate to what you are saying about being happy for other peoples pregnancies:  I have a friend who announced her 2nd pregnancy on ******** just after I had told her about my mc   I have had to hide her updates now because they are all about scans etc and it breaks my heart (actually I've stopped going on ******** very much 'cos its boring!).  Its a tricky one because I am happy for her, but sad and sorry for me - does that make sense??  Anyway I have told her that I just don't want to talk baby stuff right now and that, actually, I just need to focus on me and my path, and quite frankly be a little bit selfish whilst I'm at it!!!  Fortunately, although she has never experienced the heartbreak of mc and gets pg easily, she does understand.

However, I'm always really really happy when someone on these board get pregnant - because I know what they have been through to get there.

But hey, I am  

Trolley - dying to hear about your scan today!

CocoRuby - how are you doing today

Love
Sezy
x


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Apologies that this is a quickie girls only I am at work . . .

Just been to the hospital.  Booked in for EC on Monday morning.  They are concentraing on 4-5 good follies now which they have told me gives me a limited chance of them reaching Blasto () so I'm probably looking at a Day 2 transfer.  Wishing now that I had gone for Long Protocol again as the results were much better (although I still got a BFN!).

Feel a bit disheartened but nothing more that I can do.

Will write personals later

Trolley


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Trolley, I know you feel disappointed, but on my first ICSI I had a day 2 transfer and got a BFP.  ALthough I had an early mc, it just shows that its possible - I know lots of ladies who have had BFP's from day 2 transfers and gone home with a baby at the end of it.  I've also know ladies with less follies that have gone on to have babies (one lady only got 1 egg and got her BFP!).  Just keep focusing on the fact that its the quality that counts, not the quantity...its just possible that all that energy has gone into producing just a few good quality eggs rather than loads of lesser quality.......   

WIll think of you on Monday and send you lots of  

Sezy
xxxxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Thank you Sezy that really means a lot


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Aw, you're welcome Trolley - even though I've not had my dream come true yet, I take great faith and hope from those it has worked for, especially when they have been through far worse than I have, because it proves that little miracles do happen    And hey, we're all in this together, right  

xxxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - some people (me included  ) would be so happy with 4/5 follies and I have read plenty of stories of people that have had success with few follies.  One lady on the Lister thread had 3 eggs, 2 fertilised and she had a 2 cell and 4 cell embryo transferred on day 3 (may even have been day 2) and she had a lovely little boy a couple of weeks ago!!!    It's ALL good             
GIA Tooxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Girls you are all so right and please accept my apologies for panicking.  I just got the feeling that the nurses were disappointed with my result this time and it sent me into a flap!

Wishing you ALL a fantastic weekend and, once again, thank you for listening to me!

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

You're allowed to panic - we all know what a horrible roller coaster ride this is - it'll be my turn in a couple of weeks  

Have a lovely weekend yourself and in case I don't get a chance before then I wish you all the luck in the world for Monday        

GIA Tooxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi ladies

Thanks for your lovely messages, they have cheered me up and saved me from being such a misery!

Good news that your tests have come back with good results Sezy.  When are you planning on starting tx, 3 weeks or so?  It seems like forever when you are waiting to start but I have to say, contrary to last time, my tx and 2ww has whizzed by!  Hoping the time to tx whizzes past for you too 

Hi Trolley,  as the girls have said, 4 to 5 follies is really good but I know it is hard not to panic sometimes.  And it is easy to get carried away daydreaming about lots of follies and eggs and then having to come back down to earth with a bit of a bump...but you have a really good chance. GOOD LUCK for Monday!! xx

Hi GIA!  How are you doing?  I empathise with your oe / de struggle.  Tbh, despite my age, if we had more money, I would probably give oe one more go.  I think it is really important to be sure that you have given oe your best shot - in terms of your resources available, emotional and financial - before moving on to de.  I just think it helps the acceptance process and lets you move on more easily.  But sending you loads of    that this tx will be THE ONE and you won't have to worry about that at all!!! 

Hi Fi - thanks for your lovely txt today, was so kind of you xxx Thinking bout you on your tx - stay strong and positive!   

Hi Georgie!  Am still really excited about your de plans!  Silly, as they aren't my plans but am really hoping everything turns out positively after all the tx and struggles you have been through   

AFM, testing tomorow...but I still have no symptoms apart from today, for about five minutes, was convinced af was on her way - had the full headache, backache, sore boobs and tummy routine - but I think the cyclogest is holding it back...can't pretend I am feeling confident at all girls, but I can feel I have a glimmer of hope (buried inside!) and I just hope I am not too upset tomorrow...

Hope you all have a lovely Sunday
xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Trolley - it is natural to feel disappointed when the response is not what you were expecting.  4-5 follies gives you a good chance though if there are eggs in them.  I went from 7 to three eggs in five months and thinking it couldn't get any worse dropped to one egg six months later, and I was gutted.  But even my little one egg gave me a pregnancy which lasted longer than the cycle where I had seven eggs - so you never can tell....  you just need a good one.

Coco -  oh god, I soooo hope you come back with good news... but whatever the news is, we are all here for you...

Gia - how are you doing?  You are quite right that partners bring their own complications to the process.  I am really worried to be honest that my partner will never accept DE - I honestly don't know what I will do if he won't.  I think I will be really sad if I can't have children in one way or another.  It is hard to see others get pregnant so easily when it is so bloomin difficult for us.  I was wondering if IUI was a possibility for you Gia? Did your clinic discuss this with you?

Sezy - wow what an FSH score - what's your secret?  The miscarriage thing is hard because you get so close, you can almost touch it, and you can't help but start dreaming about the future.  I had the schools mapped out on my first one... and then the dream is snatched away and all you are left with is this huge emptiness.  However, miscarriage shows that you don't have implantation issues at least and is one of the best predictors of future pregnancy .... 

Georgie - still can't believe your plans are already in place for your trip.  WOW - in a way, I really wish I at your stage - this last bit is so painful ... I know that the most likely scenario is DE, yet I still have to go through the many visits to 'dildo jo' and watch the screen as she desperately tries to find more than one follicle.  Anyway I am looking forward to hearing about your visit ... how's things with DH - is he behaving?

AFM - started injecting Friday so I reckon I am gonna be in EC around Easter - lets hope I get an Easter Egg to remember.  Getting fatter every month - omg .. why can't i stop eating so much.  Greedy girl.

love and luck to us all

Fee
xx


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Just a quickie   Was wondering if many of you had used the chat room much  Thinking we could organise a meet up in there with a virtual glass of wine if you fancy it one evening? What do you think?


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi

Just wanted to wish Trolley good luck for today.

I wish you the best quality embryos than nature can provide ....

Love Fee


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

HUGE thanks Fee! 

Hi girls!  Back from hospital after EC this morning!  They wanted me to stay longer but I was dying to get into my own bed.

WELL bearing in mind last time I got 17 follies and 5 eggs . . .  this time I had 6 follies and 4 eggs so you were all 100% right that you just can't tell.  The Nurse popped in before I left to say that the embryologist was pleased with the quality so let's see what tomorrow brings when I get that call to say how many have fertilised.  No painkillers and not too sore so in bed now watching TV and being waited on by DH - it's good while it lasts  

Hope you are all doing OK?!?

Trolley


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

∆ Ceri ∆    -  a  chat in 'chat'  would be great. I'm in there  quite alot ( being a chat host   )

                  all but tuesday evenings are  fine for me. Looking forward to it 

luv  sue


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hi all,

Hope you are all ok today.

Well done Trolley, 4 eggs from 5 follies, that's great!  I'll be hoping that they and dh's   do just what nature intended in the lab tonight!  Are you back at work between ec and et?  I took the two days but had to work inbetween - and for the whole 2ww!!  Would liked to have taken more time off work but wasn't really possible unfortunately.

Hi Fi!  How are you doing love?  When do you have your first scan, it must be soon?  Sending you lots of    for some lovely follies with gorgeous eggs in them xx  I feel for you and your worries about dh accepting de.  I honestly do think that if de becomes necessary - which of course it won't   - that he will come around.  My dh kept putting arguments in the way for ages and one day, when I broached the subject again, said 'Well, I'm not against the idea'??!   Too late for him to change his mind back now, I've said!!  I really do think and hope that he does change his mind coz you are going to be a great mum, I know   

I'm happy to meet for a virtual chat if anyone else wants to - I don't go out much so could probably do anytime!

Hi Georgie, Sezy, GIA (how's the tx going) - and Clucky and Harris if you are out there in cyberspace!

Well, afm....I am very sad and sorry to report that it was the suspected BFN for me     I was expecting it as I had no symptoms at all and I sort of 'just knew'.    I did a test late Sat eve as I had just bought 2 CB digitals to use Sunday and Monday but couldnt' wait!  Got a bfn and then another one when I tested Sunday morning.  I was quite upset on and off yesterday and have been waking up in a real panic, thinking this is it for me and my own eggs and all the things that that means for me - no genetically linked child, no chance to see any of my familiy's characteristics developing in a little boy or girl, no baby with a biological link to my lovely mum and dad.  And just the whole reality of not having a baby that has been produced from my own body...it's been really horrible actually...  

I think the panic of having decided that was my last chance with oe started to set in too.  We haven't made an firm decisions yet, but have started to talk about doing a tandem cycle and I am going to look to see if there are any clinics that do this.  Tbh, if money was no object, I would have at least one if not two more goes with oe.  So, maybe this way, my own eggs get another chance as I got 5 eggs from the last tx (3 fertlised and I got 3 grade 1 embryos...they just didn't implant for some reason   )

So, I am going to do some investigations into clinics - probably abroad, it is too expensive here.  I need something to keep me going, so if you know of any clinics that do this, I would gratefully receive any info....

Thanks for your support, ladies, it means a lot
xxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

CocoRuby - I am SO sorry Hun - sending you huge  .  This is our last attempt so I relate all the anticipation that you've been through.  Carry on with your investigations my lovely and you will find the answer that's right for you I promise.

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

CocoRuby - I'm so sorry to read your news.    I relate totally to all your feelings about having a child that is genetically linked.  I get upset when I think about my Mum and Dad and how I have "failed" them if I don't manage to get pregnant with my OE, but they are totally comfortable with the thought of DE, bless 'em!  As for clinics, the only clinicI have found that does the tandem cycle is the Jinemed (with their sister clinic in Cyprus, the Dogus).  The cost is 5,300 Euros.  I cannot remember what that includes but I know it includes quite a lot (e.g I'm sure it includes medication for you and donor).  Anyway, have a look on the Turkey board and there is lots of info there from people who have asked before.  You have to stay there for 21 days or you can use a satellite clinic in the UK for scans etc and then go over for about 8 days (Turkey, then Cyprus).  Do they have a counsellor at your clinic that you can talk to about DE?  I haven't quite come to terms with the fact that I may have to move to DE, but a chat with the clinic counsellor helped me a lot.  Look after yourself and DH   

Trolley - how you doing?? It's horrible waiting for that phone call isn't it? almost the worst bit for me! So here's some    for you xx

Fee - Oh I am so with you on the eating front!!! I just can't stop! Doesn't help that I am current;y working in catering!    How are you?  How's the injecting going?  Have you had a scan yet to see how your follies are doing?      As for IUI, I have decided that if I only get one follie again this time, I am going to convert to IUI.  If that doesn't work, I'm just going to do 2 more IUI's (to use up the sperm I've already bought...yuk! I HATE saying that!!) and then I'll move on to DE or DEmbryo.  Personally with an 8% chance at IVF, I think I've got almost as good a chance with IUI!  

Ceri - I'd like a chat some time, but unusually for me I'm quite busy week nights at the mo, so work it around everyone else and hopefully I'll be able to join in   and thank you for organising  

Sezy - how are you today? Any more news on test results?  

georgie9 - how are you hun - I can't see any further down the thread so I can't remember where you're at...sorry    Hope you're well though   

Hello to anyone I've forgotten....... 

GIA Tooxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning girls!

Well I just got 'the' call and 3 of my 4 eggs have definitely fertilised and the 4th is 99% there.  To take them to Blasto they have to have all 4 so they have provisionally booked me in for ET tomorrow but they will call me in the morning to confirm.  If the 4th catches up then ET will be moved to Saturday.  Either way I am SO relieved  .  I want to be happy but I got to Blasto last time and I still got a BFN so desperately trying to stay grounded.

Fee I'm constantly hungry too!

Hope you're all having a good day!  Sending you all  

Trolley


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Coco-Ruby - I'm so so sorry; there's nothing I can say that will make you feel better right now so I'll just   you.

Trolley - that's great hon!  fingers crossed you can take it to blasto - but even if you don't you have a good chance, lots of ladies get pg with a day 2 or 3 embie!    

Fee -  How exciting to be having ec around Easter!  Best easter eggs going I reckon!!  I really don't know if I have a secret (re. fsh)!  All I can say is that, on the whole, I've had a pretty 'innocent' life    By that I mean I have never smoked; I have never been much of a drinker - yeah, I had the odd drunken night when I was younger, but I've really not drunk much for 16 years, since I met my hubby who is tee-total; I've been a veggie for 16 years and i just try to generally keep healthy.  Maybe that has helped - or maybe regular acupuncture  Or maybe my ovaries haven't heard that I'm nearly 40...shhhhhhhhh, don't tell them!!!  Yeah, mc can really lead you up the garden path can't it?  This time round, when we realised we were about to go for our 12 week scan and 'nothing had happened', we started to get so excited, planning how we were going to tell everyone etc - only to have that fream ripped away in the most cruel of ways.  Bart's are going to give me steroids this time round, so hopefully that will help; but obviously, if there is something wrong with the baby, nothing can help and nature will have her way anyway.  I sometimes worry that my eggs and DH's sperm won't be able tomake a perfect baby.... 

Big hugs to everyone!
xxxxx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi to all of you!  Just a quickie update from me . . .

Back home after ET and tucked up in bed being waited on   it won't last!

Had the 3 transferred - 2 were grade 4 and the other was grade 2-3 although I have no idea what the numbers mean!  

Sending   and    to you all

Will write personals over the weekend

Trolley


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hello...

Thanks for your messages, and GIA thanks for the info on tandem in Turkey.  I'm interested in what you have said about the success rates of IUI as opposed to IVF.  I've been reading that some clinics are posting stats of live birth rates of just 5% at my age (nearly 43) so am wondering whether it's worth doing a couple of tries at IUI rather than another oe ivf...but then again it looks like the tx cost for IVF at Turkey is about half of what it is in the UK...oh, it's so confusing!!

Many congrats Trolley on et of three lovely embryos!  I am glad to hear that you are relaxing and dh is looking after you - which is just as it should be   As for grading, different clinics have different grading systems for 'top' quality and slightly lesser quality (eg with some fragmentation) but I am not sure how much difference it makes to actual pregnancy rates.  It's fantastic that you have 3 developing embryos so rest up and think positive thoughts   - here are some more for you    

Hi Sezi, sorry to hear of your horrible experience of m/c    It is such a terrible heartache to have got so far for then your dreams to be cruelly torn apart...am really hoping this time will have a far more positive outcome for you!!     Am impressed with your healthy living list - I am afraid I did far too many naughty things in the past, and although I still have my moments, compared to then I am a little angel now!   

Hi Fi!  Hope you are well hon  x

I hope everyone has a lovely Bank Holiday loooong weekend...I am going to try to do a bit of research into oe ivf / iui / tandem ivf and de ivf...just a little task list then!! xxx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Oh Coco... I am so sorry.  Have just read your post today and am so sad for you.  Reading your post was like reading my own mind.  I feel everything you are feeling.  It really sucks, doesn't it.  I can only say to you that since my last go was abandoned 3 weeks ago, I have begun to feel better and once you start on the DE road, it is amazing how quickly you begin to feel excited again.  I have an appt in IVI Madrid where I have been referred to by my consultant at home. It has a great reputation and some of the best success rates I have seen.  I believe they are more expensive than most in Europe and I don't know if they do tandem.  However, from 5% chance of success to a 50-60% chance.... what am I waiting for    .  The way I am coping with it is that I am potentially losing the large bottom and bad skin from my side of the gene pool   and more seriously, reducing the scary 50% MC chance and the dreaded worry of chromosomal problems (with a 42 yr old egg).  Also, we, as the biological mothers, will still be contributing a vast amount to the development of our babies, giving birth to them and nurturing them.  How different is it really from having your own egg.... just one cell different!  

I have prattled on enough... shut up Georgie, I hear you say .  I just hope that over the next few days and weeks you are able to recover from the pain that I know so well and find a renewed excitement in your next chosen route. We will have babies    

Trolley, great news about your ET.  Snuggle up, keep your feet warm and don't forget the PMA.  Wishing you heaps of love, healthy little sticky embies and a speedy 2ww.  

Fee... keep going that girl.  Speak to you on friday.  I am rooting for you all the way.    

GIAToo and Sezy - Lots of love to you too

Lukey -  to you

Have a happy Easter everyone.  May we not be too sick on chocolate bunnies and may all the easter growing eggies do just that.  

Georgie xxx


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## Guest (Apr 1, 2010)

Quick one for Coco - so very sorry  ....there is no rush though for the next step -the most impt thing is to be ready for DE - Georgie is so right it is v exciting to know you have a great chnace of success but it also may take you time to "transition" iykwim - it did for me -and def did for DH...Good luck with the thinking   

xxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Trolley- really pleased to see you pupo.  Well done, and a tip from one of our very established over 40's IVFers, keep your feet warm.. Not sure about the grading, clinics use opposite scales but I suspect in the case of your clinic, grade 4 would mean top quality.  Obviously this cycle is going to work, but just a thought, but have you thought about going to the ARGC in London.  Mr Taranissi gets very good results with people who respond well to the drugs, which you obviously do.  He alters the dose daily to try to bring the smaller ones up to the size of the bigger ones so you end up with more mature eggs.

Sezy - are you about to start?

Coco - hope you and DH have been able to talk about the next step - you know my thoughts - with your response, I think you have a good chance, but I appreciate that finances don't always permit.  with respect to why they didn't implant - luck or bad luck is unfortunately the answer.  Each egg gives you around a 10% chance as that is how many of our eggs will make a baby.  If you get the best grading that improves things.  Although, I saw a post recently where a lady had three mature eggs, one didn't fertilise, one fertilised abnormally and the other average grade egg would you believe it got her pregnant and she is now 8 weeks and has seen a heartbeat

Georgie - lovely to talk as ever - am waiting with baited breath as to what they say in Madrid.

Gia - I have had similar thoughts to you love, but I am sure that your parents only care about you and I know my mum really feels for me in my situation.  My mum said to me recently, it wouldn't matter a jot, whether there was a genetic link - they would be her grandchildren.  I would be tempted to try some IUI (if IVF becomes too costly) if I were you because with donor sperm the only problem you have really is that, like me, mother nature didn't give you as many eggs as other women.  so effectively IUI is same chances as sex - well, plenty of women get pregnant at our age via the normal method    

AFM - well, looks like my body doesn't want to hang around - they are predicting easter monday - I currently have a 14mm, 11mm, and a 7mm.  If I could get two eggs to put back I would be over the moon. I doubt the little one will have time to catch up, but hopefully the 11mm will be big enough.  oh,  and I have done the stats and - "GOD....... IT IS MY TURN .... DID YOU HEAR ME ... IT IS MY TURN ......"     no seriously god, I would be every so grateful if you could make this work ....

Anyway got to go to a meeting ... over and out

Fee
xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey Fee - I should be starting in about 3 weeks: dh having pesa/tese next week (we used up all the last lot!) and af is due next week, so hopefully on day 21 I'll start DR.  Hoping to have 3 put back this time as I will be 40 by the time we get to ET    Excited but nervous too     Good luck for Monday  

Trolley - wooohoooo! You are PUPO!!!  I didn't know about keeping feet warm...whats that all about then (I always have cold feet  )  When is your OTD?

I'm really enjoying the positive talk about DE - When I started down this road I had doubts, but now I know that I would go that route if I needed to.  The way I see it, I would have nurtured and fed the baby for nine months, and as Georgie said, its just one cell!

have a lovely weekend ladies, just in case I dont get on again  

Love
Sezy


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Hi Girls hope you've all had a good Easter.

Sezy - my feet are always cold too so having had acupuncture I was told that it is essential to keep them warm.  Apparently if you're feet are warm then it keeps the rest of you warm including the womb hun.  My test day is the 15th but it's a Wednesday so I will wait till the 17th which is the Saturday morning as I can't face going to work if I get a BFN again this time.

Fiona - thank you for the warm feet tip and the clinic/consultant.

Feeling odd today as so may people I know are pregnant.  I've become a recluse because of it which isn't good.

Hope you are all doing OK

Trolley


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Thanks for that Trolley - I'll be keeping my socks on!!!!

I know what you mean about becoming a recluse - I'm the same.  In fact DH and I had a long talk today, I have realised that I've become quite obsessed with the whole IVF, baby-making game.  Poor DH feels side lined    So I have agreed that I will spend a lot less time visiting boards like this one, which at the moment are just feeding my obsession    What I need to do is just get myself into a much healthier headspace in relation to TTC, rather than thinking about it 24/7!!!

So, I'm going to be taking a bit of a break from the boards - though I will pop my head in from time to time to see how you are all getting on!

Thanks for being there ladies!

Sezy
xxxxx


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## Guest (Apr 7, 2010)

Just wishing Fee all the best!!!


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Hope you are all having a good easter .. I am not working so I am enjoying myself, although cleaning the very overdue bathroom wasn't the highlight of my day today.  god I hate cleaning.  Lack internal fortitude according to my mum.

Lukey - how lovely of you to think of me... how are you?

Sezy - I know what you mean about getting obsessive ... and many people find they need to take a break from it all.  Keep well and take care.  Let us know how you get on with the next treatment if you can.

Trolley - oooooohhhh getting closer to test date - I usually get more and more depressed as I get closer, don't know about you.... I thnk it is because I know I have to prepare myself for the worst.  Have you had any twinges  or darent you say??  I have been dying to ask - where is the name "trolley" from?


where's Gia gone??

AFM - well Friday was a bit strange - the 14mm decided not to grow, but the other two did, so on Friday I had 10mm 14 and 14mm.  Went back Monday and the both 14mm shot up to 20mm and the litte one had almost reached 14mm.  They decided that they wanted to give the little one a bit longer in the hope that it will produce a mature egg so booked me in for egg collection thursday 8th.  Who knows?  Quite scared about tomorrow in the respect that I so want to get three viable eggs and I tell myself that two would be good, in fact, lets face it, even one would be good - none would be seriously bad...  anyway gonna sign off now and book my congestion charge for tomorrow

Fi
xx


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Evening Ladies,

Fee - glad you are enjoying the time off and good news on the eggs!  Yes I am the same as you and am getting more nervous as it approaches.  I had a complete breakdown on Monday.  I had ET last Wednesday and had horrendous twinges last Friday morning but only for a short while.  Since then I have had other twinges/sharp pains in my groin on both sides but I have no idea if it's good or bad news as I had the twinges last time too.  My name comes from my previous occupation which I left 6 months ago - I used to be a Trolley Dolly and Trolley is what my friends all call me  

Sezy I know you are avoiding the boards but just in case you log on I am sending you  

Hope the rest of you are doing OK?

Trolley


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Fee - I'm here  .  Want to wish you all the luck for tomorrow - hope those 3 follies  produce wonderful eggs for you and DH       

Trolley - hang on in there   and   for a positive result for you!    

Hi Lukey  - hope you're okay     

Hello and   to georgie, coco and everyone else.

AFM - been really busy and away this weekend, but AF finally made an appearance and I started sniffing today, start stimming on Friday.   I get more eggs this time, but not too hopeful so trying to keep busy with everything else    

Night 
GIA Tooxxxxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hello all,  

Sending you lots of     for today's ec Fi - am hoping you get three lovely mature eggs.  It's great that you got 3 follies this time round, it shows that we can't always predict what is going to happen.  It's a good sign for you, I can feel it!  

Hi GIA, good luck with the down regging!  I think this means you are on the long protocol?  That's the one I was on both times.  How many eggs did you get last time?  Sending you lots of    too

Hi Trolley!  I am glad you explained the origins of your name! Did you travel to lots of exotic places?  I've travelled a bit myself but there are still lots of places I'd like to go - tx sort of puts a stop to that though!  How's the 2ww going?  I hope you are managing to stay calm, easy to say and difficult to do.  My first 2ww was torture but strangely the second one went really quickly...when is your otd?  

Hi Sezy, I hope you are ok.  I respect your decision to stay away from the boards for a while.  I had to do that after my m/c, I couldn't face all the tx and baby talk, it was too heartbreaking.  Having said that, I find this board such an amazing support, I am not sure what I would have done at times had I not been able to come here and talk to / read other people's stories.  I hope you are taking some time to get yourself to the place you want to be   

Hi Georgie, thanks for your note, you are so lovely and so thoughtful.  I hope that I didn't offend anybody with what I said about my fears and worries about de - I just felt I needed to be honest regarding some of my feelings around not having my own genetic child.  I'm still having panics from time to time but they are a little milder now, thank goodness...How is your Spanish tx plan coming along, have you had the initial consult yet?

Hi Clucky - thank you so much for your lovely message of support, it meant a lot to me     What are your plans now?

Hello Fi7 - likewise, thank you so much for your lovely message - we haven't 'spoken' before but I was really touched that you took the time to pm me - thank you 

AFM, well, I am quite up and down still, poor dh is bearing the brunt of it    One day I am ok and feeling quite positive, the next I am on the floor.  I am gradually climbing up again though, it is a slow process!  I am still coming to terms with de - I have a feeling inside me that this is going to be the way I will have to go if I want to have a baby.  But I still feel that I need to do a couple more txs with my own eggs to really come to accept it.  I have a follow up with the consultant next week and I plan to try an IUI (I think at my age the odds of success are the same as with IVF - GIA, I think you might be able to correct me on this, I remember you talking about IUI vs IVF odds at our age?) and if that doesn't work, I will have one last tx with my oe, probably abroad as it is cheaper!  Then, if I have to, I think I will be looking at de later in the year.  That's the plan for now - but who knows?!

Love to you all
xxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Lukey - I accidentally deleted my message to you!  Hello, how are you? Thanks so much for your lovely message, it was so nice of you to post.  How are you doing, what are your tx plans for now?  I hope everything is going well, you really deserve to have that little baby in your arms, one way or another!


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning girls,

GIAToo - thank you adn I'm really pleased you've finally made a start

CocoRuby - I worked for Virgin Atlantic for 13 years so I was purely long haul and did see some fabulous places.  I left 6 months ago taking voluntary redundancy to pursue IVF but luckily I've kept all of my concessions for 2 years so we are planning a trip to San Francisco and Napa Valley soon.  My OTD is next Wednesday but I can't bear to test in the morning before I go to work as I know what a mess I was last time so I'm going to wait until next Saturday instead (unless AF arrives first of course).  Really pleased that you are making plans - remember there is always a way . . . it's just finding it!

Trolley


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Everyone 

Nice to see so much chatter going on here ..

Trolley - I like it ...put's a whole new perspective on it when you know the reason behind it. I keep wondering about changing my name, it is so boring, but everyone knows me as "fiona in welwyn gc" so not sure what to do. Doesn't matter I suppose... I think the twinges are a good sign - though was never quite sure whether they were from the progesterone - my first BFP I had shooting sensations as I got closer to test date - so I tested and couldn't believe my eyes. My second I had nothing after two days BFN, third I had implantation bleed BFP, fourth nothing after about 6 days, but hey who knows. The BFN's are devastating .... I always have a back-up plan i.e getting ready for next cycle and try to take consolation where I can - as I said before, the long term outlook looks good for you ....just a case of how long is long.

Coco - thank you as ever for your lovely texts, it is really nice to have such support. I totally get what you are saying about DE - it is a really hard thing to accept, there is no doubt about it. Have you had any counseling - I hear Zeta West has someone good. I was thinking of going with a great big list of honesty statements.... to see if I can get it all out on the table where it can be dealt with i.e. "what if it doesn't love me when it finds out" "what if I don't love it?" " what if it turns around at 15 and says "you're not my mother" One thing I have considered is that it isn't a donor that prevents us from having our own genetic children, it is our bodies... although I appreciate that at our age, there is little chance of a further natural after, but hey my grandma had 11, and the last at 45 .. so it is possible. who knows, our bodies my accept a baby more readily after having one Also, as for DH, well, let's face it, if our men had to go through what we went through, we would forgive a bit of snappyness, wouldn't we...

Hi Gia - I don't understand why you are on the sniffer if you are a poor responder? did they say why - I just go from the pill to the stimms?? What dose and drug are they putting you on?

Georgie - how the hell are ya? I am sooooo exited for you, I can't wait. How is the hospital going? any moany patients lately?

AFM - well, bit of a hairy start today. Firstly, we were called into the small room on the ground floor and this chap starting confirming details - strange I thought, this is not the procedure we followed the last two time, oh well. Then he says, we just need to settle up the ICSI treatment.. payment for ICSI I said?? I thought paid for that on Monday (on monday I specifically went to the cash office to settle up because I did not want anything to go wrong on the day. I told the lady I wanted to pay for it all, said that ICSI was about 4700 plus three blood tests and three scans - there was some confusion over the blood test costs and she didn't know what to charge but that she would invoice me. I don't recall seeing the amount because I think she handed the terminal after she had entered the amount. Well cut long story short, she took only for the prescription. ahhhhhhh - really peed off because that could have been a disaster - I just happened to take my credit card, just in case, but as far as I was concerned, there was no need.

THEN ...Went down to theatre - petrified that I had ovulated because they left me an extra day, and the scanned me, after loads of digging around - doc says "hmmmm, this follicle is irregular and a bit flat - might have popped or on it's way?? - you okay with one follicle? " well, thank god for anesthetic because I only had about 30 seconds to feel sick about it. Anesthetist was great - I told her what doc says and she says "well, I best get you in there quick before it pops love" - great big smile - here we gooooo...

Anyway long story short, was told I had two eggs when I came around - no talk of wierd shaped eggs or anything. Spoke to embryology who just said "two mature follicles" and that was it - oh and DH's sperm aint too bad - much better than two years ago interestingly. So, now I wait with baited breath as to whether they fertilise     I have to hope for one and try to think of two as a bonus, I know, but it is bloody hard.

Fee
xx

PS - just in case any of you are thinking of trying to provide the sample in the room (single, I should add) - don't bother - I have never known my DH not be able to <cough cough> on demand until today. Imagine it, hospital room, do not disturb sign, chair against the door, it is 8.35am and my collection is 9.00am and they have to prep me - just a little pressure.        Don't worry girls - we found a solution


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Fee what a difficult rollercoaster day you've had honey . . . As all the ladies on here said to me over and over "you only need one" and they are right.  It's a rotten journey we are all going through full of highs and lows.  Have yourself a lovely early night and I will be online tomorrow to wait for your news in the morning when you've had that phone call.  Sending you heaps of   

Trolley


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Oh My God Fee... I can't help but chuckle at poor DH's ...uh...hum... predicament   .  I expect you were on hand (sorry for the pun) to save the day.  Anyway, fantastic result and just what you deserve after all that worry and anticipation beforehand.  Lets hope for great fertilisation and little baby Fee-Fee's after that.  Thinking of you so much    

Trolley,  thinking of you too.  Not long to go now, although I bet you wish you were in some gorgeous tropical place right now.  What a great job you had.  I applied to be on the first-aid training team 12 yrs ago.  Got to the last 2 from about 300 (apparently) and then they chose the other girl .  How different my life would have been if I had got the job.  I was gutted at the time.  Then, to cap it all, I heard they sacked the other girl after 6 months.  They asked me if I was still interested but by then I had joined the army and was committed.  Funny how life goes.  Perhaps if I had done that job I would have married a different guy and had 2 or 3 kids by now.  Oh well.  Anyway, all good wishes for you on Wed, or Sat if you are delaying it.  

Coco,  I know just how you feel, My poor DH doesn't know which way to turn or what to say to me sometimes.  I find if things are going right for me on any given day, I just about hold it together.  But, if anything goes wrong, like I burn the bacon or I miss the bin man, I just turn on the taps.  Crazy lady   .  Any way, I have confirmed my 1st appt in Madrid on the 28th, only 2 weeks away and it is amazing how much better I feel for having a plan.  You must go with your heart and your feelings.  You will know when the time is right.  If I were you and had had previous BFPs I would probably be carrying on with my own eggs so I think you are right to carry on.  I have never had even a sniff of a BFP (well, I had an HCG of 4 once... big whoop-di-do) so I feel DE is my only chance.  If you ever want to chat please pm me.  You can have my mobile no, no probs.  Take care and don't forget to spoil yourself every now and then.

GIAToo - great to hear you are sniffing again.  Looking forward to following your progress.  Lots of love and   for a good harvest this time.

Sezy -     to you if you log on every now and then.  Well done for taking some much earned time out though.

Lukey, as ever,     to you too.  Thinking about you lots.

That's all from me.  Off to see the poorly people  (most of whom aren't really poorly, just attention-seeking... oops, did I speak my mind )

G x


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi

one egg fertilised, one didn't    

have to be happy with one again!!!


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Oh Fee - I will     for you that it really does only take one.     

Be back over the w/e for personals.....xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## Guest (Apr 10, 2010)

Fee - you have done sooo well! You know it only takes one - it did befiore  - everything crossed it is a good one!   

Hi all 

xxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hi All, just a little check in to see how you are all doing!  I've been very good at avoiding the boards, but need a teeny 'fix' every so often!

Trolley - how are you doing?  

Coco - Hope you are feeling OK hon.

Gia - Fingers crossed for you!

Well, poor DH had his surgical sperm retrieval on Wednesday just gone; he's so sore   bless him!  I got AF the same day!!  And we were told the next day that we are good to go on this cycle, so I will start injecting on 27 April!!!  So excited, scared, nervous - you know!!!  All I can do is hope and pray that everything goes well and that I get a BFP that stays with me this time.  They are putting me on steroids this cycle to boost my chances - anyone had any experience of that

I'll check in again soon to see how everyone is getting along.

Love
Sezy
xxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi 

Just a quicky for Trolley.

Ohhh love - I just came across your posts - I am so sorry .....  this road is so painful .... 

thinking of you

Love Fee
xx

PS - does anyone know when embryo is meant to divide from 2-cell to 4-cell.  Mine was only two-cell on Saturday but she said it was still early? (11.30am)


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## Trolley (Feb 14, 2010)

Morning Girls . . .

Well AF arrived this morning - the day before test date like last time.  I haven't cried yet as I feel completely numb and I'm just going through the motions of getting ready for work so as not to have to face the reality just yet.

There is a small part of me that is relived that our IVF journey is over . . . since December 2009 I feel I have been tied to needles and clinics and have been able to think of nothing else - even my friends.

We are going to give ourselves a break and head to San Francisco and Napa Valley for a fabulous holiday and I am going to look at returning to the job I adored for 13 years and gave up in order to concentrate on IVF and be closer to the clinic.

We still pray that one day I will carry a child of our own and in the meantime we continue with our application to emigrate to Perth in Australia.

As I'm sure you can understand I am going to lay low for a while but I will pop in now and again to see how you are all progressing and I wish you all the luck in the world girls.  You have been a tower of strength for me for which I am eternally grateful.

Much love

Trolley


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## suedulux (May 27, 2006)

awww  Trolley  
I  sooo  understand . Take care of youself, and  maybe come back  sometime  when ya feel 
you'd like to  help others  by sharing your experiences  maybe ? 

Luv  sue


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Trolley - I'm so sorry hun.     A break from the boards is probably needed and I totally understand that.  Be kind to your self and DH and enjoy that trip to the US.

Fee - how are you doing? Hope you're not going too    I insisted on NOT doing the long protocol this time and did the Flare protocol so I only sniffed for 2 days before I started injecting.  So it's a short protocol with sniffing - I do believe that is the medical term!  

Sezy - Hope your DH has recovered from the TESE  I totally understand the scared, excited etc feellings - I felt exactly the same last week

Hi Lukey - hope you're ok and thanks for your good wishes on the Lister thread  

Georgie - hey are you still in the army? I love the discipline of the army, but i would never have joined 'cos I'm too cowardly!    Oh, you said you were looking after sick people, so not sure what you do now?  Just being nosey!  

Coco-Ruby - how you doing hun? The odds I was given for IUI (medicated) were 2-3& or 3-5% (as compared to IVF at 8%).  Have you had your f/u consultation yet?  I hope you are feeling better though  

Hello to everyone I've missed - sorry but have a lunch meeting to get to....

AFM - I'm in shock as I had my first scan today and there are 6 good sized follies!    I guess a change of protocol was needed after all   although I know there's still a long way to go.  Could be in for EC on Monday or Tuesday!  

GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

So sorry Trolley       totally understand wanting to lay low for a while - thinking of you xxxx

Gia - DH much better now thanks; he must be as he has been getting frisky!!  Emotions up and down as we are approaching 1 year since first loss (on 1 May) - I will have started down regs by then and it feels weird...the memories just keep flooding back    I'm trying so hard to put them to one side and focus on the positives, and on upcoming cycle, but its not always easy   Gotta just go for it though eh??

Sorry its just a quicky - got a busy day today!

Love to all,

Sezy
xxxx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hello all,

Just a quicky as had a really long day - just finishing up!

Trolley - I'm so sorry to hear your news    Its absolutely heart breaking for you and such a hard thing to have to go through    I hope that you and dh can take some time out together to suppport each other through this horrible time.  I hope you can enjoy your travels and come to a place where you can decide what your next steps will be xx

Hi Sezy, hope things are going well with you.

Congrats on the 6 follies GIA!

Hi Fi - am sending you lots of    for your little fighting embie!

Hi Georgie, Sue Dulux, Lukey, Cluckey   

I had a follow up appt yesterday, it didn't go too well!  The consultant basically told me to start thinking about adoption or de and that I had less than 5% chance with oe now I have moved up an age bracket.  I know she is right and is only trying to be realistic but I didn't want to hear it, to be honest.  I was feeling a bit better about getting 5 mature eggs with three grade 1 embies - I know the second tx didnt work but I wasn't expecting a de speech just yet...anyway, I am having a quick IUI next cycle and am having a think about whether to do one more oe in the next two or three months...DH is not so keen after I told him what the consultant said but I feel I want to give it one last shot, I think!  SO, still have some thinking to do...

Love to all
xx


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## Coco Ruby (Jul 21, 2009)

Hello...

Just though I'd say Hi as the thread has done very quiet...

Hi Fi, hope you are ok    

Hello Trolley, you may not be reading but am thinking of you and hope you are ok x

Hi GIA - how was ec?  Are you on your 2ww now?

Hi Sezy, how are things with you?

Hi Georgie, Clucky, Sue Delux, Lukey xxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hi Ladies, how are you all dong today?

Coco, you are right, it has been quiet on here for ages!

I start DR next Tuesday - getting excited and nervous    Working really hard at focusing on the here and now and not on the past (this last week and into next week sees the 1st anniversary of all the trauma leading up to our first loss...everything is reminding me of that time  ).  I have been having some very strange thoughts and dreams about having triplets....maybe having 3 embies put back and the addition of the steroids will bring me triple trouble    Anyway, I just really want to get going now and make my dreams (on all levels?!?) come true.   

Would love to hear how everyone else is getting on.

Sezy
xxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi Ladies,

Coco - how are you doing?     Sorry I didn't reply to your last post and that you got the DE speech.   Good luck with the IUI, when will that be now?  I am indeed on my 2WW now.  
Sezy - good luck with this treatment     It's good to look forward now and I hope that you can put the past behind you and concentrate on this cycle now  

Fi - thanks for your encouragement and I didn't even ask about you    I see it was OTD yesterday....how did you get on? Hope you're ok    

Lukey - thanks for your encouragement too.    

Hello to Georgie, Clucky, Sue Delux,  

AFM - Had a day-2 x 5 cell embryo (Grade1-2) put back yesterday.  I know I should be positive, but just felt so overwhelmed with disappointment yesterday.  However, today is a new day and I am going to try to be positive and hope that this works     I keep thinking about what to do next treatment wise, but I need to get to OTD before I think about that, 'cos you never know I might not need more treatment eh? 

Lots of    to everyone
GIA Tooxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Fi - just wanted to send you huge apologies    - I obviously didn't  read your post properly on the Lister thread and get updated on your news.      Are you going through the Lister for DE?  Sorry again. 
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Afternoon ladies!

Fi -     So so sorry  

Started DR today, so trying hard to remain positive and upbeat, and put the past behind me (GIAToo   ) I have my baseline scan booked in for the 11 May (day after my wedding anniversary!), by which time I will have been 40 for 5 days   , the upside to this is that I can have 3 embies put back if I want to  

Down regs are a bit boring, but I'm sure once I start stimming, I'll have a lot more to say  

Love to all,

Sezyxxxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Everyone OK


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Its gone really quiet on here - where is everyone?  Are you all OK

Sezy
xxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy - not stalking you honest  

Hello everyone - I hope you are all ok.  I know it is early early days yet, but I wanted to tell you that I got a   yesterday and hopefully it will all be ok and then hopefully that will give you all some hope?  

I'm highly anxious, but   I'll get through the next few milestones   

  
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Gia, I've already PM'd you.  Just take each day at a time and enjoy every minute    

I wonder where everyone had gotten to?  It was really busy on here and then suddenly it went all quiet.....

xxxxxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi All

Sezy, how's the treatment going?

Gia.... I pm'd you.  Have you got blood results yet?

I haven't posted as thread went quiet.  I am having my follow up next week
and I intend to do one last cycle but I am pretty much resigned to the fact that this is going to end in Donor Egg.  I have booked an appointment with Instituto Bernareau (think that is how it is spelt) for a couple of weeks time.  I want to get all tests out of the way so we are ready to go.  It all seems very positive with about 70% success and that average donor age is 24.

So, onward and upward

Fee
xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Fee, don't feel down hon; DE is a really good option and one I would seriously consider if I have too.  70% success rate is brilliant - I've talked to so many women on forums who have done DE are just so happy that they did.  Lots of         to you hon and a big   

xxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Fee - I filled on all my forms for DE at the weekend and hopefully I won't need them, but I will keep the forms just in case.  It is a really really difficult thing to come to terms with and maybe if I need to in the future I will try once more with own eggs because the thought of DE was/is still so hard to accept, so I totally understand how you feel. However I made a list of pros and cons of DE too and the pros far outweighed the cons.  I hope you found the other thread I started on the whole subject useful anyway.    

Sezy - can't believe you're doing that wind tunnel thing    - brave girl! Mind you I always was a bit of a wimp! And I hope you have a fabulous 4Oth birthday, despite that old bag AF turning up   .

Thanks for your PMs ladies - I will reply, honest! I have just been in a bit of a daze really and feeling sick all the time, which I think I've said is probably more anxiety than anything else.  Having said that, I didn't go for bloods.  When I spoke to the nurse at the Lister, she said there was no need and only if I started bleeding would they recommend it - I'm doing more knicker-checking now than I did in the 2WW!!    My first scan is booked for 25th May and I just think I will do another HPT a week before that.  I've asked my Mum to come with me for the first scan......I'm scared, she is excited!    For now I am going to do my best to live in ignorant bliss and assume all is well!      

    to you all
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Fee - in aswer to your question:  all going fine at the moment thanks hon.  Have been a bit teary, but I think its a combination of drugs, AF, sad memories and turning 40 tomorrow!  Can't wait for stimms and steroids which will make me feel good again   

Gia - I can so relate to how you are feeling, especially the knicker checking! I was the same last time I was PG - and how many hpt's did I do??.  I think If it works again will just have to try and relax more - but its so hard!  

I'm so looking forward to the wind tunnel - I'm too much of a wimp to jump out of a plane, but would love to know what it feels like, so this seems like a good option!  I do like a bit of adrenaline; I got my pilots licence when I was in my 20's, though i don't fly now cos its too darn expensive!  I just wouldn't go as far as jumping out of the plane, or bungee jumping or anything like that.

Someone please tell me that 40 isn't too bad - I'm feeling really strange that today is my last day of being a 30-something   

Lots of love to you all,

Sezy
xxxx

P.S.  Gia - I don't mind if you want to stalk me!


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy - being 40 isn't so bad! I was really worried about turning 40 so I threw a big black-tie do, which people still talk about now, to ease the pain!    I am now embarking on the best "project" of my life and I would never have had the confidence to do this before.  30 was great and 40 is great in different ways.  I am growing as a person every day, which sounds really naff, but it's true and I certainly appreciate my "good bits" a lot more than I ever have.  Enjoy!! (and that's an order!)    

GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

'aye aye cap'in Gia' !!!!!!!

I know its only a number, and i won't be any different tomorrow from what I am today...I guess its just our society that puts significance on it, espcially when you are ttc!  DH remined me that there are societies out there that don't have calendars and don't mark birthdays etc and so have no idea how old they are.  That sounds like a great way of being to me.  And he says I don't look 40 (but what the heck is 40 'supposed' to look like!), so I guess thats a blessing!

Anyway, off to bake a big chocolate cake now!

hugs

Sezy
xxxxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hello All

You are probably wondering who I am but I have been lurking for a while...had a painful ectopic back in nov and have had a BFN iui since...

I simply had to come on to wish Gia...lots and lots of congrats  ..I am really so happy...our 40+thread really needs some BFPs

Sezy...I have wondered why this thread is so quiet..i was thinking there would be so many of us 40+ youngsters on the baby trail...wish you the very best for this cycle.

afm..i have decided to bite the bullet and go for another ivf in a month or so...but need to have a laproscopy first 

Hope this thread gets busy soon

lots of luv
p.s anyone else find this new version of FF a bit jerky as keep loosing my cursor
xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Welcome hope!!!  Its usually quite busy on here, but has been a bit quiet of late - but there's Fee, Gia and me here, so your certainly not on your lonesome!  Maybe some of the others will pop along soon?

So sorry ot here about your experience.  Its so hard isn't it?  But, we're a determined little bunch, and we will get what we want eventually (Gia is looking pretty good at the moment!).

I just take great inspiration from the many ladies Ihave met along the way who have beated all kinds of odds and now have their babies - it can and does happen, and more often than we think   

So I'm sending you       for your next cycle whenever you start.  Keep us posted   

Sezy
xxxxx


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## Stretch (Jul 8, 2008)

Thought you might like to post here 2morrow 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=236039.new#new


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## Grimmy (Apr 29, 2009)

Hi Everyone,

I too have been lurking around this board for a while - I normally post on the QM board as that is where I am having treatment.  It's been quiet on there too so may just be time of the year!

Anyway, I have just started stimming on my second round of IVF.  I had the first round back in Oct/Nov last year and got a BFP which sadly only lasted a couple of days.  Fingers crossed this round works for us and sticks as it's our last attempt (my DH really isn't into the whole IVF thing and is only doing it under duress as it's free on the NHS!).

Congrats to GIA - such a wonderful bit of news and I so admire you going it alone.  I pray that everything works out for you.

That's all for now - will try to keep you guys up to date with progress but am not brilliant at posting!

Cheers, Grimmy


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi all. I have been reading your posts and felt quite moved my the stories..some very sad, some very hopefull and some fantastic news. I am new to all this and very nervous because i have just recently started my first IVF, (short protocol..gonal f 450ml and cetrotide) I will just tell you a little about myself. I am 43 yrs and have 3 children by a previous marrage. i have been with my DH for 6 and half yrs now but only started trying to conceive last yr after going through a reversal Feb 09, My DH is 32yrs and so girls i have myself a toy boy







!! I am so scared/nervous about the whole ivf thing but reading your stories really does help. At this point i am on day 7 of gonal f and day 3 of cetrotide.(Today i have bad headache so took day of work)  I have been to the clinic this morning and the nurses are pleased with my progress,i have 3 foliys at 17mm and a few more between 14 and 16 that they say should catch up! I am going back to clinic tomorrow for another scan and all been well should have my late night injection tomorrow night, which means Ec could be this coming Sunday. Anyone else had Ec at care manchester? wishing every person out there good luck ttc x


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

Hello Loll & welcome to FF. 
Here are a few more links to help guide you around the site ...

*IVF General ~ *CLICK HERE

While undergoing treatment, you might find it useful to join other ladies having treatment at the same time. The Cycle Buddies threads are just for that. You will find a thread, usually with a funny/inspiring name for this year's buddies. Just pop along to the appropriate month and say "Hi" when you are ready to start treatment.

*Cycle buddies ~ *CLICK HERE

I see you are from Yorks. Here are the Yorkshire boards ... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=256.0

Manchester Care chatter thread ... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=220104.0

Wishing you lots of luck x


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

~ Ceri ~ said:


> Hello Loll & welcome to FF.
> Here are a few more links to help guide you around the site ...
> 
> *IVF General ~ *CLICK HERE
> ...


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hello all and welcome Grimmy and Loll!

I'll do personals later - but just wanted to say to Grimmy, that my DH is the same, and not sure what we will do if this cycle doesn't work for any reason; lets just say he'll take some convincing to do a paid for cycle!

I had a great birthday - the indoor skydiving was AMAZING!!  I highly reccommend it if you're not pg...a fab pick me up!!!

But, I'm feel    today as yet another friend has announced her pregnancy, and her sister's too - the world seems like a very unfair place at the moment......I know that you guys will uinderstand what I mean!

Anyway, will catch up later as I gotta dash right now!
xxxxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Sezy and Hi to everyone else hope your all well   
I know what you been about the cost that why me and DH have said we will pay for just this one. 
Well just updating.. went to clinic today and am ready... having EC on Monday scarrrrryyyyy just hoping i get one lovely little embie that wants to stick around. Good luck to you all xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Good luck Loll


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - good luck for Monday      Very exciting!   

Grimmy  - welcome and I hope you are successful this cycle       

Sezy - glad you had a great birthday, but sorry about having to deal with other people's pgs.  It's so hard isn't it?     

Hope - so sorry about your recent BFN    .  I hope that all is well with the laparoscopy and leaves you all clear for your next round      

Hello everyone else!   

I'm feeling a bit weepy and hypersensitive today and can't stop reading stories of other people that had m/c etc - not good as I should just be positive and take each day as it comes.  I AM trying   

Hope you all have a lovely weekend ladies   
GIA Tooxx


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## fiona in welwyn gc (Dec 5, 2008)

Hi Everyone


Gia - I can totally understand your anxiety with the m/c at our age.  And really there's not alot I can say except, there is little that you can do affect what happens now.  The scan usually gives a clearer picture.  More often than not, the scan gives warning signs of a miscarriage.  As you know, I stuck my head in the sand and didn't bother with a scan.  Easier said than done, but I consider the scan to be the "pregnancy test" at our age. ... But we don't all miscarry Gia ..... there's a thread on the ARGC where a 43 year old lady got pregnant on her 5th attempt and is having twins and everything looks great... Dimmee also at ARGC.  I will pray for you that your little one lasts the distance.  Every day that goes by, is a day closer to 12 weeks.       


Loll, hi, - how exiting.  I hope you get lots of good quality eggs tomorrow


Sezy - I know what you mean ... it is really hard to watch others have it so easy and we have to go through all this..but you do respond well love - the outlook is hopeful for you.




Hi HOpe - how are you now?




Grimmy - welcome ... - I had a chemical pregnancy and another after that - it is a very good sign that you will go on to get pregnant again    


AFM - well going for the follow up on Tuesday - same old conversation - 10% chance of success blah blah blah.  This is going to be my last OE cycle.  Having had two pregnancies and two miscarriages and now only getting one viable egg, I don't think it is worth doing any more after that.  I hope to start treatment in about two weeks time with Lister.  After this I am going to IB in Spain for a donor cycle.  I am quite exited at the thought - 70% success, 30% chance of twins and reduced risks e.g. downs... miscarriage.  I was very sad for a while, but I have decided that if this is the only way I can have a family, then I will take it, and be happy.


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

*Loll* - hope you EC goes well today hon!!!!

Grimmy - Hope you are doing Ok on the stimms!

Gia - hang in there honey, there are lots of good positive stories out there 

Moog - aw sweetie, I can totally relate to how you are feeling. Its so hard seeing other people get pregnant (I have 3 friends pg atm, and it hurts like hell), and to be going through all this without people knowing is so hard. We didn't tell any of our families about our IVF, only my 2 sisters who I am really close to. My mum is of the opinion that her children _should_ be providing her with grandchildren, and often makes snide and hurtful remarks about the fact that none of us have yet (we've all been busy getting degrees, getting careers and buying houses to ensure security...because that is what we were told we should do!!!), most of this directed at me because I am the eldest. after my mc inJanuary, I just had to tell my dad - he is a very wise and sensible man and I'm really close to him; he was so great, and at least now I know he is there for me. What your in-laws said was really insensitive, but then if they don't know what you are going through, then they don't know to be sensitive - just like me and my mum. I guess sometimes we just have to suck it up and carry on: This is a very painful and personal journey and you have to be careful who you share it with because not everyone understands. Luckily, us lot on here DO understand 

My Dh is a bit fed up with me too......

I know that this either will or won't work, but I'm finding it very hard to try to think of the possibility of never being able to have a child. DH remineded me this morning that when we first met, children wasn't even on the cards - he has never wanted them, and at that time I wasn't keen. But as time has gone on, I've just felt the urge growing, and because he loves me he has gone along with it. But, because of the past expereinces and the effect it has had on me, and him to an extent, but mostly me, if this one doesn't work, I'm not sure if he would be happy to try again. This scares me so much as i just can't visualise not having a baby, despite the fact that I have spent 40 years without one! Am I making any sense? I'm sorry for the rant, but I just needed to get it of my chest....its all bringing me down so much that I just can't get excited about this cycle, and I really want to 

my weekend of birthday celebrations has come to an end, and I'm exhausted! We did the indoor skydiving (vertical wind tunnel) on Thursday; family dinner on Friday night; and on Saturday night my brother, sister, me and som friends went to a 'proper' karaoke club, where you have your own little room, and then went for a delicious middle eastern meal (where I ended up belly dancing on a chair! - I used to be a professional belly dancer...). The thing is I just can't do late nights anymore - didn't get to bed until 2am and so I'm still paying for it today!

I'm now on day 14 of down-regs: I have my baseline scan tomorrow and should be starting stimms tomorrow, along with the steroids. Hopefully this will lift the low mood that has been dogging me for days now. I said to my acupuncurist that i didn't feel like this the last two times, and he pinted out that I didn't have the same fears then...hadn't thought of it like that.

If there is any spare PMA lurking around out there, please send it my way......

Love
Sezy
xxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi all
Sorry to read some of your posts regarding failer and lack of support from some famileys etc. But sending out lots of       
It must be really hard for some of you and my heart goes out to you all   . I too have kept my ivf to myself except my sister who is older than me and thinks am mad for doing it however she understands that i want this for my DH and so is supporting me    

My EC went well today i had 9 foliys but one was small, on a positive note they did get 8 eggs from me so fingers crossed some will fertilize    I am feeling quiet well but a little tired so just posting a quick update then going for 40 winks.  lots and lots of      To you all, wishing everyone good luck xx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - brilliant news on the 8 eggs hun - let's hope they turn up the Barry White in the lad tonight and there's some good love action!       

Sezy and Moog - I hope you don't mind me doing a joint personal, but I wanted to say this.........people are always telling me how brave/strong I am to be going on this journey alone, but you ladies are AMAZING!    I cannot imagine having to go through all this and not tell people about it - I'm a terribly open person and because I was doing this with donor sperm I felt from the start that I was going to be honest and open about it, I would NEVER have coped if I'd had to keep it to myself and a DH.  It must be SOOOO hard dealing with peoples silly and insensitive comments without screaming at them "DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH? DO YOU THINK I DON'T WANT TO HAVE A CHILD AS MUCH AS YOU WANT ME TO?  ?!!!"  To have gone though all you have gone through, and are going through, without crumbling completely under the pressure of secrecy (which I TOTALLY understand by the way) and the strain of ttc and tx, is amazing.  I know that in a lot of ways I am lucky to be doing this alone, not least 'cos I only have MY feelings to deal with, but all I can say is to try and take each day as it comes and not look too far into the future - that's what I was advised and I DO know how difficult it is, honestly.   But if you can try to just concentrate on this cycle, do things that help you relax and switch off that nagging voice in your head, it will really help

Moog - I'm not condoning your sister-in-laws behaviour, but maybe she simply doesn't know how to deal with it and perhaps even feels a little guilty that she has her 2 children?  People are notoriously bad at communicating and knowing how to deal with sensitive issues.  I know it's not the same, but you're invisible friends here will always be here for you and we at least understand how you're feeling, even if our journies are slightly different    
.  

Sezy - I did acupuncture on both cycles, just to help my brain stop thinking so much mostly, so hopefully that is helping you and I also found the second cycle difficult in different ways to the first!  Good luck for your baseline scan tomorrow        On a lighter note - professional belly dancer eh?? I have seen some great belly dancers (my ex was Lebanese and we went to lots of Lebanese restaurants), I think belly dancing is fab and so hard!! How cool!   

This journey is so hard for anyone on it in a multitude of ways and I wish I could fix things for everyone I meet along the way, because you really are all wonderful women.  Hope I have helped in a tiny way      

Fee -thanks for your words of support - I have only "moments" of fear now, they don't last all day!!    The Lister only gave me an 8% chance of success with OE (hence the nerves about something going wrong!), but if you want to give it another go with OE then you should and I wish you all the luck in the world - how long will you have to wait to start?

Lots of love
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

*Gia* - I know that you are so right, and someone else has literally just said the same thing to me! Live in the here and now! How lucky I am to be surrounded by wise women who understand - I'd go  otherwise!

It is hard having to take another persons feelings into consideration in all this: DH is a wonderful man and he has gone through a lot too on this journey, having his bits poked and prodded etc. He loves me so much that he is willing to go through all this to make me happy. But since the loss last year, he's not seen a lot of the happy, smiling woman he married, and so I totally understand that he must thinking that I'm not happy, so whats the point?  He thought that this would make me happy....and it does, but it also makes me anxious, hopefull, excited, scared....OK, so maybe I AM  already!!! The point is, He is a man and men are solution focused creatures - they see a problem, they look for a solution to fix it. IN this case, he see's the woman he loves being sad and so the solution is to take away the source of the sadness, i.e. TTC - but he then is in a no-win situation because _not_ TTC would make me sad too. You know, there is a lot to be said for those cultures whereby the men and women live separately and only get together to reproduce 

Oh god, I'm just rambling now!!!

xxxxxxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy said:


> know, there is a lot to be said for those cultures whereby the men and women live separately and only get together to reproduce


If only it were that easy!!


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Yeah right!!!!  Life is never going to be that easy is it?!

Thing is I actually do love my man, and like having him about!  So I guess we just gotta get on with it, enjoy what we have and hope for the best   

xxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hey Moog, we all have our days, I'm having one today, panicking about money and the fact that I haven't got a permanent job!

As for nutrition etc - to be honest, on my first cycle I tried to do every thing right.  I don't drink or smoke anyway so I didn't have to worry about that.  I may have the odd glass of wine with dinner, but only once every few months, so apart from a glass of Bucks Fizz at Christmas this year I haven't had a drink since November.  I bought Marilyn Glenville's book "Getting Pregnant Faster" and followed her advice on eating protein and taking pregnacare (with Folic Acid) and fish oils.  I cut out caffeine including chocolate which was a killer for me and also really cut back on sweets in general, which is my down fall.

However, by the time the second cycle came 'round, I was already thoroughly fed up with the whole thing and wasn't as careful with my diet etc.  I kept thinking about my two cousins who got pregnant naturally at 44 who both drank, smoked etc and weren't even trying!!!  I kept thinking that I didn't really believe in all this stuff about diet etc.  I didn't go mad, I still didn't drink and smoke, but I ate sweets and chocolate if I felt like it and just carried on taking the pregnacare etc.

On my first cycle I did some acupuncture, but not before and after ET, which I did do the second time.  So I'm not sure what I believe in really.  I also insisted on changing the protocol AND the drugs on my second cycle.  Hopefully my little beanie will last the distance   

Loll - how did your eggs get on in the lab??       

Sezy - how you doing today?

AFM - I'm feeling quite tired and weepy today. I did another HPT this morning (ahem....2.30am in fact   Probably why I'm tired   ) and it came up 2-3 weeks.  I thought about having blood tests, but to make it worth while I'd have to have 2 now to see how the levels are increasing and I just can't afford to spend £100 on that - what will be will be.  I am so worried about work and money at the moment and I really need to relax!  At the end of the day, if I need to cut back on a few things, I will.  Trouble is I have already stripped my spending back to the bare minimum these last few years whilst trying to make it as an actress!  Just need a permanent job..........  

Oh well, onward and upward.....

Take care everyone
GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hello everyone!

Moog - I was just wondering; were you a fan of Willow The Wisp when you were little    As for your question on nutrition - I did get a bfp on both my previous cycles (see sig.) and I did watch what I ate and took vits and had accupuncture.  I absolutely swear by accupuncture and I'm convinced its what helped me get my bfp's.  There is so much written about what you should and shouldn't eat during tx, and about what vits you should take.  I had a chat to my accupuncturist about it and he just said to have a healthy balanced diet (lots of root veg - apparently very good for the female reproductive system), take pregnacare - can take Q10, vit B complex if you want.  he also told me to take vit D as he felt I was a bit lacking.  He also said not to take L-arganine (which so many women take during IVF) if there is no issues with response to the stimmulation drugs as it can have a detremental effect.  Its so easy to become obsessive with what you put into your body during this - Im guilty of that myself - but, as Gia mentioned, we also need to remember that women get pg all the time whilst they are 'behaving badly'!!!

Gia - hope you are doing OK today.  Its OK to feel weepy; you're hormones will be doing odd things, and hey, its a big deal being pg right!  

I had my baseline today.  All good and starting stimms tonight, along with the steroids.  Had a bit of a shock; the doctor at the scan mentioned, very casually, about my PCOS!!!  I was like "What?  THis is the first I've heard of it!".  Apparently, in a scan on one of my previous cycles, I was showing positive for PCOS and they didn't thing to mention it!  Its weird because I've never had any problems; AF has always been regular etc.  Fortunately the lovely nurse I saw after said its nothing to worry about as I'm only border-line, and its to my advantage anyway because it means I responde really well.  I also asked about my egg quality today - never thought to ask before.  She had a look through my notes and said that my eggs have all been good and that "...you're very fertile..."  I can safely say that this put a big smile on my face - with all the rubbish out there it can be easy to believe that everything goes hard boiled once you get to 40!  So its been an interesting day!  We're aiming for EC on 24 th May


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy - great news that you can get going with stimming - your EC will be the day before my 1st scan - eek! 

Moog - I'm with Dr Thum at the Lister, but he was on hols in March so I saw Dr Faris for my f/u.  He wanted to do the same protocol as the first time, but I didn't understand that and said I wanted to do the Flare protocol.

1st Cycle was: Long Protocol, 7 days Synarel, 16 days 450 menopur 
2nd Cycle was: Flare protocol, 2 days Synarel, 10 days 450 Gonal F

I responded much better second time, but still only ended up with one viable embryo - just    it sticks for the duration now.  

GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hehehe   , no Moog, I'm not puking!  I think its lovely!!  DH and I can be sweete like that and often wonder if people think we're a bit corney   .  WTW was great - they should rerun it!

xxxxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hello All
its me ...the absent Hope but ever present in lurking mode...I am so sorry I dont post more often..i used to post alot when I first started out on the IF journey all wide eyed and full of positive thoughts and hopes...but now have lost alot of steam and have been so low on energy and cant find the strength to speak sometimes.

>>>But just had to come on and let GIA know that whenever I get a bfp i take myself straight to the early preg unit of local hospital and insist on 2 day blood tests to confirm...and they also do early scans to keep an eye on the little beanie...all part of the NHS and something you should be entitled to free of cost...if you're over 40 and IVF preg they will take special care of ...stay happy and keep the bad thoughts away...

all the best hun and good luck to us allxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hello *Hope* - nice to hear from you. I can totally relate on the running out of steam thing - I was all wide-eyed and full of hoe when I started out too, but you do get a tad jaded the further along you go! But the hope is still there, and we carry on until someone says stop or our bodies say 'enough!' 

*Gia* - I echo what Hope has said, and i wish I had done that last time - it would have saved an awful lot of heartache in the long run. I'm gong to insist on early scans and blood tests right from the start of my next pg - in fact, Barts have already said they will do extra early scans with me if this one works.

Did my first stimm injection last night - running out of places to jab! Have done a couple of the buserelin injections in my leg just to give tummy a rest, but they hurt like hell in the legs as I've not got much fat there to protect me! Started the steroids last night too - normally would take in the morning, but they said it was really important to take the first dose with the stimm drugs...as a result i kept my poor DH awake until 1am because I was jabbering!! My acupuncturist was right - they make you high!!!! Took my second lot of steroid this morning and I am so full of energy and euphoria its unbelievable      spin Dh said he wants some!

Off now to make use of some of this energy!

xxxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Thanks a lot Hope and Sezy    - I'm going to go to an "early pregnancy"  talk at my local maternity unit tomorrow and I will ask about blood tests.   

Sezy - sounds like I could do with some of those steroids! I can't keep my eyes open during the day then sleep really badly at night.  Was very miffed with a friend who text me at 1.15am last night    She said she sent the text at 11pm, but even that's too late in my book! I can't stand the fact that I have to switch my phone to silent 'cos of people texting late at night, when I want to be able to hear the phone in case my parents need to call me!

Sorry for the moan, feeling a bit miserable about work etc at the moment tbh.

GIATooxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi All   
Sezy.. really pleased for you, now you have started on the stimms its all systems go chick x
Gia.. i understand your worry just had a bit of a cry myself, and i have'nt  got to the bfp stage yet   , am sure you and your little one will be fine     

My update... Had phone call yesterday and told...out of 8 eggs one was'nt mature enough so that one would have never fertilized.The other 7 all fertilized and the nurse told me that i had 100% fertilization rate and could'nt get better news. I was very positive yesterday and my DH and i went to london to watch a new tv show, so good day out.
Had phone call to day and told one was slow and may not do much however the remaining 6 are all grade 2 (2/3 cells) and they want to do a 3 day ET tomorrow. Feeling very emotional and scared because as from then its down to me to carry them and keep them safe. Stupid i know but cant help the way i feel. Was told that grade 2 on day 2 was very good and they will have a look at them  again tomorrow before the transfer and let me know how they doing. Hopefully they will be growing just fine    but still feel abit negative about the whole thing!! Does anyone or know someone that had grade 2 transfere and went on to have a BFP?

Wishing everyone luck and lots of


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi Loll - GREAT news about fertilisation rates!!! woo hoo!!       As for grading, my one little embryo that I had put back this time was a Grade 1-2, 5 cell and it was day 2 transfer, so it can work.  There really doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to which embryos stick and which don't as far as I can tell.  Some Grade 1 blasts don't stick and some some dodgy grade 3's do!    Try and be positive, stay relaxed and go by the positivity that the clinic seems to have          

GIA Tooxxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Yay *Loll*, thats great news! I had day 2 transfer of 2 x grade 1 1st time and day 3 transfer of 1 x grade 1 and 1 x grade 2+ the 2nd time - both bfp's, so your crop is doing very nicely and you have a good chance 

*Gia* - I know what you mean about the tiredness, I was like that too when pg; just go with it hon! Do you not have a function on the phone that you can do seperate settings for certain people? So maybe have it silent for friends and on for your parents? I'm not even sure I have a facility like that on my phone, but then its is quite basic, perhaps more jazzy phones have something like that

Still high as a kite!!!!!

xxxxxxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy - I'll have a look at my phone and see if I can do that - good idea!  I know I could do it on my old phone - only let some people get through and divert everyone else to voicemail, not sure it worked with texts though    With regard to asking for early scans/blood tests, I would assume that I could only push for that if I had had m/c before?  Or maybe I can use my age as an issue?    When is your next scan??

GIA Tooxxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey Gia - I would push for it on the basis of age: They usually will make an appointment for you for a "reassurance scan" if you are feeling a bit anxious.

My next scan is on Monday, so hopefully follies will be really on the go by then   

xxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

ET day.. OMG we had 3 transfered    1 x grade 1,7 cell. 1 x grade 3,6 cell and 1 x grade 2,5 cell the remaining 4 (the one they thought might not do anything, actully caught up) was all at grade 2, 4 to 5 cells but they said not to freeze because they didn't expect them to survive the frezzing process   .
Only had 3 put back because we was told the grade 2, 5 cells could take and implant and so seemed a waste not to, was also told that by putting 3 back we stood a better chance of getting a BFP from 1. They said they didn't expect all 3 to stick.
We now have a 12 day wait for the blood test roll on the 25th. Hoping and praying that at least one of my little embies will grow into a lovely healthy little baby that we will get to hold and cuddle in approx 39wks             

Wishing everyone luck and lots of    to all x


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey Loll - wishing you lots of      and      and   

25th May is a good day - its Gia's first scan that day and the day after my EC...I just have a feeling about our little gang here   

xxxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi to all








Thanks Sezy for the 







and the  your right, it will be a good week for good news alround  .
For some reason i am a bit snappy with my DH today and looking forward to him going back to work on Monday am not back till Wenesday so will have a few days peace and quiet. I stopped smoking just before starting stimms and could do with a cig today







but i will stay resisted for my little embies. Am eating loads and trying to be very healthy plus eating lots of protein so am starting to pile the pounds on







' Hopefully it will all be worth it







.

Hi Gia how you feeling today chick ? hope your well 

Lots of














to everyone


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey ladies,

I'm kinda needing your help today  It seems like the high I was getting from the steroid has left me and I'm now feeling really sad  . Its a bit strange - I'm happy that I'm doing this cycle, and Iknow that there is every possibiity of this working (going on my previous history and the fact I'm getting some extra help this time - plus what they said to me at the clinic on Tuesday) but I just can't get excited. Maybe its a good thing that I'm not excited - but you know what, I actually _like_ feeling excited and I want to feel the same way as I did at this stage last time, which was totally full of optimism and hope...and I really can't explain how I feel right now. Part of me feels very positive that this will work and the other part ofme has lost all hope 

DH said that its just my hormones and the steroids and I just need to remember that; but its not always easy is it? Maybe its because of what has happened before; something deepdown is telling me not to get excited perhaps? Oh I don't know!!!

Anyway, I'm figuring that my lovely friends on here would understand and could maybe offer me a littel  boost, cos right now I'm flagging a bit!

Hope you are all OK,

love

Sezy
xxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Sezy
I think your DH is right hun and its your hormones.  Although this is the first IVF and will also be the last for me, i do understand what you mean about been excited then doubtful. I feel the same way, its a rollacoster of emotions from morning till night. I think i want to be optamistic and all excited then a little voice says "hey you dont get carried away you know that there is a hugh possabililty this will not work, you have read so many stories and heard so many BFN's" but then a bit later i find myself rubbing my belly and saying hang on in their little ones then a voice tells me "hey there is every possabililty this will work, you have read so many stories and heard so many BFP's". I think the best attidude to have is what "will be will be" but its hard keeping those little voices out of your head. However at the end of the day " what will be will be" . Either it will work or it wont and all you can do is.. Eat healthy, get some excersise (walking is good) and try relax and other than that there is nothing more you can do but pray!
I am prob not really helping you chick but just know we all go through the rollacoaster ride of emotions. Sending you lots and lots of                    
Love Lorraine


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi All  
Question- Today i woke feeling sick and felt this way all day, i have also now been sick a bout 4 times. I dont beleive this could be morning sickness as surely its to early ?? It's just 6 days since ferterlization. Could it possible be a side effect from the pessieris am inserting on a evening ?? has anyone else had this symptom or am i just ....







....









Big congrats on all the BFP's














and














to all the BFN's


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey Loll!

Oooooo, I don't know about morning sickness this early...with my last one I started to feel sick about 7 or a days post 3 day transfer...so maybe its possible!!  I really hope so hon!

I had my follie scan today:  all looking good - 21 follies growing, 1 x 18mm and all the rest around 10 to 13mm.  Might be ready for EC on Friday; I've got another scan on Wednesday and we should have a better idea then.  They might want to push for a couple more day to make sure we get nice mature eggs for ICSI.  Getting exciting now!!

Lots of hug to everyone,
Sezy
xxxxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

WoW thats fantastic Sezy please keep me posted    I have't felt as sick today just abit off so maybe i had a bug    Amfeeling abit negative today and thinking am going to be getting a BFN, not many people get a BFP 1st time around   perhaps am just getting myself ready for the results    . So plesed for you and as i say please keep me informed   

Gia. Thanks for the personnal    hope your still feeling positive chick


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Its gone quite on here hope all is going good for everyone

Sezy. How you feeling chick? hope its all going well x

Gia. Thinking about you hun hope all's still good not long now till scan x

Me am doing ok 2ww starting to drive me mad and am getting negative think am just getting myself ready to here the BFN, 7 days to go....  scarry


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey Loll!  Hang in there hon - only a few more days!!!       

Had scan and bloods done yesterday....I have 28 follies growing and my estradol is a bit high...so I'moff the Gonal-F now and just on buserelin.  Another scan and bloods tomorrow and if everything is OK, I'll trigger on Saturday for EC on Monday!  Excited now!!!!!  Just hoping those estradol levels come down!

Hope everyone is doing good!!

Sezy
xxxxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Sezy- good look at clinic today hopefully your EC will be Monday. Fingers crossed for you. Keep me posted with any news hun   

I am having bad headache's, started Wenesday still have it today. Just cant seem to shift it and its kept me awake last 2 nights so feeling tired. Not been into work yesterday or today although it does't feel quite as bad as it as done so hopefully by tomor it will have cleared. Other than that and feeling slightly sick now and again (from the headaches) i am ok, even boobs are only slightly tender! Not positive about Tuesday's test day. I did a hpt yesterday 7dp3dt got a BFN as i expected although i thing it prob too early to test really. Anyway i have told myself i wont do another test and i will wait for blood test Tuesday. But i have convinced myself it will be a BFN.

Good look and   to everyone 

Gia- How are you and bump hope all is ok not long for your scan now chick x


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Loll - you're right, its too early hon!  I've know ladies test BFN right up to test day and then they've got a BFP...sometimes even BFN on OTD then BFP a few days later.  Hang in there, and not more testing til Tuesday!!!

Feeling very bloated now...got one follie of 33mm!!!  Will know later today if we are going for EC on Monday - I sure hope so!!!!

xxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - I did a test 9dp2dt and it was a BFN.  Tried again 11dp2dt and it was a BFP - I'm not encouraging you to test again before OTD, but you did test too early and at least you know now the HCG from the trigger shot is out of your system, so if you test again and it's positive it's a pregnant positive not a trigger positive.  See?    Believe me once you get a BFP the next 3WW is FAR worse    Good luck for Tuesday        

Sezy - oh my, you do have a lot of follies ready to go don't you?    - I can't think why they'd delay EC beyond Monday, but what do I know! Very exciting times - and just in case I don't say it again, good luck for Monday (or whenever!!).        

Hi    Hope and Moog!

AFM - well I did my final (honest guv!   ) pee stick yesterday and it said 3+ weeks so I'm hoping all is well in my big bloated body! Only four more sleeps until my scan....yay!  So scary and exciting.  I might actually believe I'm pregnant when  I see something on the monitor      I believe my chances of miscarriage go down a little bit if they see a heartbeat and everything is okay at this scan, don't they?  Won't stop me worrying though I'm sure.    Going to Mum and Dad's tomorrow for some rest!

Have a lovely weekend everyone   

GIA Tooxx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Oooooo Gia, I'm so excited for you!  It is lovely seeing the little beany on the scan    Yes, your chances of mc do go down a little after seeing a heartbeat - I was just really unlucky with both of mine, so please don't be scared    Is someone going with you hon?

Yep, I'm about ready to burst!  There was an issue with my hormone levels (risk of OHSS), but I think that if they are still worried they'll do EC on Monday and then freeze the embies for later ET.  I have to say that my levels were MUCH higher the first time round and we still made it to ET 2 days after EC, so I'm sure it'll all be fine    Just want my eggies out and my embies in now!!

XXXXXX


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Sezy - good old Mum and Dad are coming with me for scan - I've told Dad he can't come in the room unfortunately!!    xxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi ladys
Well headache as finaly gone and am feeling well for the 1st time since last saturday. Feel normal so not sure if thats a good sign. I dont have sore boob, cramps or any other symptoms other ladys seem to have. I am now 12 days since EC and 9dp3dt. From reading other's stories my clinic seems to me giving me a blood test alittle earlyer than anyone else. It will be Tuesday which will be 15 days since EC and 12 days after 3day transfer. My period should be due on the Thursday (28day cycle) altho i tend to have my cycle between 27 and 29 days so anytime from Wenseday i guess!







for a BNP but really still feel negative about that









So sorry for those who have got to the 2ww and then get a BFN








Fantastic for those with a BFP, Big congrats to you all









Hope everyone else is well and things are going to plan


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

*Loll* - When I was PG I had so few sypmtoms it was un believable! Boob didn't hurt, I just felt 'aware' of them; I did have some cravings and went off some foods, but didn't have any nausea; just a little more tired. Its actually very common not to have symptoms - in fact there are culture who don't even have a word for sickness in pregnancy because it doesn't exist - this is particularly the case for those cultures with a primarily vegetarian diet apparently (this interests me as I'm a veggie). So don't read anything into anything hon - just wait for those results 

*Gia *- Oh I'm glad your mum and dad are going with you. Yeah, if its a 'fannycam' I wouldn't want my dad in there either!! Really looking forward to hearing all about it hon 

Well, I'm triggering tonight ready for EC on Monday! Can't wait - I'm so bloated now - I look about 5 month pg!! So uncomfortable 

Have a lovely weekend all of you!

Sezy
xxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Sezy- that was just like me i was so bloated i felt ready to pop lol. Good luck for Monday will be thinking about you. keep us posted x
Gia- bet your so excited  i would be at your stage. Good luck keep us posted x


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Gia- How did your scan go ? hope all ok. 
Sezy- How was your EC ? hope all good x

My test tomorr but i already know it will be a BFN as i have started to loose a very small amount of brown discharge since this morning and am waiting for my AF to start soon (altho i wish it would start now as its like slow torcher, and am knicker checking every half hour







but only a very tiny amount of brown discharged and not everytime i wipe. (Sorry for the details)
Was naughty and bought a first respose today it was negative confiming my thoughts. Dare not tell DH i have done one as he believes we should wait for hospital results with a blood test. I am day 26 of my cycle and if they was a chance i was pregnant am sure it would of shown on the hpt. Dont want to go to clinic tomorr because i dont want my DH to here its negative he will be in bits and i feel helpless in shielding him from the pain the result will bring. Cant stop crying to day, life is crap and i feel i have let my DH down. Not that he would say it or even think it but i do







Not sure how i will cope tomorrow when clinic tell's me no


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - my scan is tomorrow.    I am so sorry that you are feeling so bad today        - I'm sure you know your own body, but you just never know.  I cycled with a FF on my first cycle and she bled profusely from the day she got her BFP for about 2 weeks!  She is still 14 weeks pregnant now.  I am sure. like you say, that your DH won't blame you.  It is nobody's fault, it is just a horrible and difficult journey which sometimes has no rhyme or reason as to why it works for some and for others it doesn't.  Somebody said to me after my first cycle that she believed a lot of it was down to luck and by doing more cycles you naturally increase your chances of "getting lucky".  That's probably not helping you much right now, especially if there are financial worries.
Just don't give up just yet - see what the hospital blood tests says and remember, SO MANY women get a BFN the day before OTD and then get a BFP on OTD.  

Take care      

Sezy - hope EC went well today        

GIA Tooxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Thanks Gia. i Have heard about these people who get BFN day before OTD then get a BFP but not read any posts myself from these people. The thing is i dont feel anything what i mean is i dont feel any symptoms no sore boobs no AF pains no nothing just down in the dumps due to discharge and hpt . I just never thought i could be lucky enough to get a BFP 1st cycle, always felt negative about it. Strange really because i never had symptoms in the past just a missed period then sore boobs then MS around 7th week although with my youngest Daughter i did bleed on weeks 8,12,and 16 for a dat or 2. Please post tomorrow be nice to hear some good news from someone my age or their abouts x


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - I didn't get any symptoms either before BFP.  I will still keep everything crossed for you hun      

Will let you know how I get on tomorrow - having a bit of a wobbly today - wish I could sleep until 3pm tomorrow!!   

xxxxxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

I have every faith in all been well for you hun x x Again Thank you


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Aw Loll  it ain't over til the fat lady sings hon! After my last BFP I had brown bleeding on the day of my sca and everything was ok (at that stage). Just wait for the blood test tomorrow. And you've not let anyone down - just remember that even when doing this naturally it can take coupls many many months to conceive.....

Good luck for you scan tomorrw Gia my love - enjoy!

Well ladies, I have to admit to being a tad disappointed









Despite having all those follies, we only got 8 eggs out of them







What the







?? I'm not really sure what happened there! Has nayone heard of this happening before? I know that so many ladies get a lot less than that, but going on my previous track record (14 the first time and 17 the second time), I feel a bit let down: something told me that they should have done it on Friday...I've been coasting for 5 days and I'm sure I've lost some mature eggs because of the.

So I'm just hoping that we get a good fertilization rate! I'll let you all know when I hear form the embryoligist tomorrow.

Gonna go and chill now......

Sezy
xxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Sezy just having a smile at what you said... i have just used the same saying about the fat lady on another thread. we must think alike   .  8 eggs is not bad hun and remember it only takes the one. Looking forward to hearing from you tomorr x


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Girls me agin sorry to be a pain but just need to post my update..  My brown light discharge changed to a slight pink but it appears to have stopped now   . Not sure what to think only that the pesserie i take on a night time is stopping my AF coming? Its very strange and am starting to wonder if am clutchin at straws. I have read some posts of women having negative hpt's to go on to have a BFP with a blood test. Doubt i could be so lucky. I would't of tested today if i had not had the discharge but with both together it's very unlikely i will get a BFP tomorrow. Saying that why as my AF not come?? Perhaps it will be another storie in the morning   .  x


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Me again... well its all over got a BFN from blood test. Me and DH Heartbroken
Good luck to everyone else x


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Aw Loll, I'm so sorry hon     Nothing I can say to make you feel better, but I'm here if you need me.

Gia, how was your scan?

Well, we have 4 embies and we're going for 3 day transfer on Thursday.  Still a tinsy bit disappointed, but hopefully those 4 will continue to thrive......

xxxxxx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Oh dear - so sorry Loll to read your news     

Sezy -   that your little embies keep on developing    

  Had my scan today and they said I am 6 weeks and 5 days pregnant (which  i don't get as I thought it was from day of EC plus 2 weeks?) and the  embryo is measuring at 6 weeks and 3 days.  They said they allow for  +/- 4 days in their measurements, plus there was a "very strong  heartbeat" and they were very happy.  Thought I'd feel relieved, but I  just felt a bit weird, still too scared to start celebrating I think    Sorry, I know you probably think I should be just happy, I AM going to try and relax a bit more.

Lots of love
GIA Tooxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Gia- fantastic news well done will be thinking bout you   
Sezy fingers crossed for you chick    all goes well x


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Loll - thanks hun, I appreciate how hard it must be for you right now


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hey ladies!!!

Aw Gia - you've got a ticker!!!  How you doing hon

Well........................I AM PUPO!!!!! We had 2 beautiful (that was the embryologists description!) embies put back, both grade 1, 1 x 8 cell and 1 x 6 cell. We did have the option of putting another grade 2 embie put back too, but after a lot of humming and harring, we took the advice of the consultant, Mr Al-Shawaf, who was doing the transfer and just went for the two top grade ones: he said the risk of triplets and any complications was too great, but that it was up to us: after we made the decision, he said that he thought we have made the right choice - so I'm happy with that. They only freeze grade 1's, so no fosties - the 4th embie was a slow little grade 3, 3 cell. The transfer went very smoothly - Mr Al-Shawaf actually teaches others to doit and has been around since the very first IVF's were done, so we were in great hands - I didn't feel a thing. I did weep with joy, especially when the embryologist told us that we 2 x top grade embies; and plus, its a very beautiful and emotional moment when they are put back...DH was holding my hand and it was lovely









So now in the 2ww mental asylum  Wish me luck!!!!

Sezy
xxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Sezy congratulations on been pupo wishing you all the best hun x


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Thank you Loll.  How are you doing hon?


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Its hard and stilll hurts but as they say upwards and forwards. I have posted on 2ww board and see you have joined the mad house there lol. If you read my last post it says on there what our next steps will be. I will diff be reading posts on ff so will be watching out for your outcome hun. You takecare of yourself, hope all goes well for you and you get your BFP


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

I just saw your post on the 2ww board.  I understand your pain and I think you have made the best decision for you; as you say, you just don't know what the future holds...you never know   .  Good luck with the house hunting, and do stay in touch with us all - just because we're all on different journeys doesn't mean we shouldn't share expereinces   

Lots of love

Sezy
xxxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Totaly agree Sezy


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Gone a it quiet here!

Where is everyone??


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hi all...its me ..hope...

I was wondering how everyone is ..

Sezy...are you near your test date..do let us know...am hoping so much for good news  
Gia...how are you and the little beanie.....hope you are taking it easy and keeping stress low..

Hope you girls all come back soon...  

I am on my gazillionth cycle  of trying naturally inbetween ivf and IUI..hoping against hope that this cycle will give me the elusive 2nd line after 3.5 years (apart from the one ectopic loss from my ivf last year)...if not then we will be gathering the ££££ thousands to start our next IVF...

Please God...give us girls here on the 40+ site lots of BFP's    

hope xx


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Hi Hope!!!  Oh hon, I wish you all the best and      that you have success soon!  Why don't you join us over on the other over 40's board?  Its in the ttc over 40 section of FF and its called 'IVF with own eggs...anyone else out there?' (or something like that!) Its a bit more active than this thread for some reason - lots of lovely gals and lots of chat!!

It was my OTD yesterday - though I did test 6, 5 and 3 days early!  I got a BFP again - very happy and cautiously excited, and    that this little one stick with us!!!

Take car fo rnow hon!

Sezy
xxxxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

OH MY GOD     I am so happy for your sezy ----congrats    ..what good news

Thanks for letting me know of the other 40+ site with own eggs...i was wondering why there was so few of us...felt a bit lonely and wishful....will definatley join you there if i can find it.

Hope Gia and the rest of the gals are fine

speak to you all soon

xx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Moog
Enjoy your hol chick and hope all goes well for you with your nxt treatment x


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hi All

just to let you know that AF got me again ...its been over 3and a half years of BFNs....Af got me early so didnt have time to sort out my meds for ivf this cycle..but will be doing ivf in july Godwilling. I am so crushed...and tired...hope i hear lots of BFPs from you girls as it always raised my spirits and gives me hope.

xx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi ladies - sorry for no personals.
Had my scan today and sadly there was no heartbeat.







I knew as soon as she measured the embryo that it was too small for the dates. I feel rather desolate, but managed to get through two job interviews. I've just come home and can't stop crying now. My mum is away on holiday so I haven't told her, but everyone else (including Dad) have been lovely. I just feel no-one can help. I feel so many different things - the first thing I did was pat my tummy and say sorry to my little embie so I understand now when women say they feel it was their fault, even though we know deep down there was nothing we can do. I feel like I don't think I can try again as I feel I'm too old, but I guess time may change that. I know some of you ladies will know exactly how I feel rightt now so I won't go on. 
Take care all
Love 
GIA Tooxxxxx
Hope - sorry that your treatment has been delayed


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Gia- omg i am heartbroken for you, no words can help i know that, but dont give up chick your not too old. Take sometime to greave    i Had mc along time ago now, had scan at 12 week the baby was the size of 10wk with no heartbeat and had to be taken out of me so i understand your feelings x

Hope - sorry for the delay. I dont understand how you missed it (sorry for my ignorance). I did the short protcol and phoned clinic day AF arrived then started on stimms the next day??


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hi All

Gia....im so so sorry....i was so happy for your bfp..and i know how you feel...believe me...but please dont give up ...you are not too old....and please dont blame yourself....I will be sending you lots of     

Loll....the reason i didnt have meds ready is  i order from central homecare as alot cheaper and i paid everything for the order to arrive today...but they rang me late yesterday to tell me they couldnt deliver until they received the orginal prescription in the post...it was all too much of a mad rush and i like to have everything in good time so i dont panic and stress myself so i decided to get the meds  etc for next cycle...also they didnt have any sniff bottles in stock which is something i needed immediately...so it all pointed to me just bowing out of this cycle...it just didnt feel right to be so stressed and manic...and as im going to be on the short protocol having a delay of even a day of meds would have made me paranoid about the effectiveness of the whole cycle...as it is i am a worrier and i want to keep my blood pressure down through the ivf to help give little embies a fighting chance...im sure you understand where im coming from.

Although it seems futile ...me being ever hopeful will still try BMS this cycle to try and concieve naturally although have not had a BFP from BMS in over 3.5 years...only an ectopic pregnacy last november with IVF...

wishing you all so much luck....  
xx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hope- i understand now thanks chick. i didnt do the sniffing just started on Gonal f 450 2nd day of cycle. Diffrent people are on so many diffrent drugs its hard for me to keep up. i too am a worry but try to be positive so i know what your saying.
Wishing you all the luck with your next cycle x


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## Sezy (Jan 13, 2009)

Gia - OMG, I'm so so sorry: I know how you feel as this is what happened to me in January - its was my 12 week scan and baby only measured 8 weeks.  I knew as soon as sonographer went quiet and then they swapped over for a second opinion.  Its a devastating feeling.  I know that there is nothing I ccan say that will make you feel better but I'm sending you lots of     - the only thing I can say is that you will get through this and you will feel better and ready to move forward in whatever direction you feel is right for you in time.  I've been through the heartbreak twice now, and I'm still here to tell the tale.

All my love

Sezy
xxxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Loll....thanks for sharing...wow..i didnt know you could do stimms without the sniffing...i learn something everyday from you ladies...were you taking anything with the gonalf that prevented you from ovulating before ec...and how often did they scan you during stimms...can I ask which clinic you were with...looking at your signature it looks like you had a very good response and fert rate...

wish you the very best for your next....
xx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Hope. Yes on day 2 gonal f 450, day 5 started on cetrotide 0.25 to stop ovulaton, on day 9 i had the late night injecton, day 11 egg collection, day 14 ET. Nothing before the gonal f and only one pesserie on a night which i started the day before ET up untill BFN. That was my full treatment. Had scan 1 week before treatment started and the day of starting gonal f, also on day 5, 7 and 8. The clinics i attended was between my local assisted conception unit for all scans and meds and care manchester for the EC and ET. They both was highly impressed by my responce and at my follow up appointment was told that if i choose to do it again they would do the same again although may consider giving me an injection to help with blood flow (cant remember what he called it) but he did say he was't sure about it because my womb had been lovely through out! Its so hard trying to get my head round it all, as so many people doin/having diffrent things. They say they cant answer the question why they did't stick around its just one of those things!!!!!
x x


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Thanks Loll

always  good to know re other peoples protocols....it increases our knowledge so much so that we are more aware when talking to our consultants...thanks again...

xx
p.s where is everyone??


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Hope
Hope your well chick? I know it's gone so quite on here, think they may of all jumped over to 2ww. Well i certainly hope thats the reason lol


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

dear LOLL.looks like its just u and me....is everyone really on 2ww...thats so wonderful...i was going to cycle this month but now its been delayed to next cycle....feel like i should get my skates on...at the moment i am trying to get a nhs consultancy revised as the dr i saw told me that I am not a candidate for a hysteroscopy on the nhs as I am considering IVF..and they only offer it to couples trying naturally   ...i told her i was trying naturally too and have been for 3.5 years but i am considering ivf too as time is getting on...she told me i could have have the hysteroscopy with the place i am having ivf....as if a mere £2.6k is nothing...

I spoke to my GP and my ivf consultant and they both think with my history i should be entitled to treatment on the nhs and should not have to pay just beccause i am considering ivf...

I spoke to the lead consultants sec and she said she could try and squeeze me in late july for a follow up with him to discuss this....God....I am fast racing towards 43 and all this delay is not good for my little eggies.

hope you are well...will post on the other 40+with own eggs soon...just want to catch up before I do and the site is a supersonic blaze as its so busy i cant seem to catch up to the current page...but will get there.

luv and luck to all...especially those on the 2ww..do let us know how you're getting on


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi ladies - I'm here, reading, but not contributing much.  Feel so sad and hopeless most of the time...oh and angry, confused, isolated, lonely, old, broke, weak......    

Hope - just wanted to say that when I was looking into to getting a hysteroscopy done I was quoted £350.  (not sure if you meant the cost would be £2.6k, but thought I'd mention it).  I know exactly what you mean about not wasting time....I can't make any decisions right now and that clock is ticking so loudly in my head.    

Loll - where are you having treatment? 

Sezy - hope you are doing well   

Sorry to be such a misery..  
GIA Tooxxx


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## hope25 (Apr 28, 2009)

Hi Gia...so nice to hear from you...im sorry about the way you feel...i know..its horrible..i have had 3 mc...so know the feeling well.

Can i ask where you were quoted £350...i have rang around and all of them have quoted around £2600 with some quoting more  ...i think spain is cheaper but still 1600 euros in total with flights , hotels etc on top..

Would be great if i can get it done for £350 but assume that would be just a look around inside me but not for any procedure to correct anything they might find..but maybe if someone can do it for that amount then i could try and find the extra few hundred...but finding an extra few thousand when I should be entitled to nhs care seems unfair.

Hope you feel better soon and onwards and upwards...dont give up...you CAN get pregnant.
luv xx


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

Hi Hope - maybe I have the wrong procedure in mind?    I think you're right that it is just for a look around..    All my paperwork is at home, but I will dig it out tonight and let you know.  The fact that you have been trhough this (3 times!   ) and still come through the other side feeling hopeful and optimistic, gives me hope. Thanks    

GIA Tooxxx


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Hi Gia - nice to hear from you chick. i also understand how you are feeling. A number of years ago i had mc at 12 weeks the baby was the size of 10 wks and was dead inside me so they had to remove him/her still can remember my due date which was the 19th sept its such along time ago now but i remember the feeling well i went on to have my son and daughter followerd by another mc at 6wks. Some yrs after they discovered i had endometrious (sorry cant spell it) anyway was told both tubes was blocked and would you believe it but during appointments i fell preggers with my youngest daughter who will be 14 in sept. I then went on to get steralized, i didn't realize at the time i would get divorced and find my self with a new younger hubby and wanting another baby. After my reversal last yr i had a chem preg early this yr and then started ivf. My treatment had to be payed for and i went between my local assisted conception unit for drugs, scans and bloods etc and care in manchester for the EC and ET. I cant aford another treatment. We had said at the time we would try ivf just once although i must admit that if we could afford i would certainly do it again but my hubby as said its more to do with the upset the BFN brings than the money and he could't go through it again so we are just going to carry on ttc naturely and if it happens great if not then its just not meant to be!! Chin up hun and believe in your self x x x

Hi Hope -  I would diff but my foot down and insist on a hysteroscopy on the NHS before paying for ivf chick then you know for certain if any what the prob could be. Sometimes life just does'nt seem fair does it but dont give up it can happen for you x x x


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## Loll (May 2, 2010)

Woo this site has gone quite, hope its because everyone is on 2ww!

Hope.. i sent you a personel mess. Hoping all goes well for you x 

Gia..Hows things with you chick? hope your ok x
Moog.. Good luck for the 26th hoping all goes well sending you lots of   

Takecare
Loll


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## GIAToo (Nov 8, 2009)

I need some views please.......I just got back from Athens. When I saw Peny on Wednesday, she said based on my history she would advise that I continued to try with my OE, but would recommend NATURAL IVF as I only end up with one embryo anyway and the body would naturally "pick" the best egg to ovulate. I had the aquascan and that showed that there were still "remnants" of my m/c so I'd need a hysteroscopy plus I had a large cyst on one of my ovaries. She also took a sample for the Hidden C test. The C test was negative, so she said I could have the hysteroscopy in UK (for free, I already checked this with a medical plan I pay into), but I might want to get rid of the cyst as it would slow my hormones down and delay my AF. However, the next day my AF arrived (as I expected!), but the cyst was still there so I had it aspirated (no anaesthetic







). Then she said that as the C test was negative, then I could even try natural IUI! I dont know what to do! I asked Jaya (Lister consultant) about natural IVF and she said that as I produced 4 eggs last time, she didn't think it was necessary, but I have thought all along that as I only ever get one GOOD egg, the drugs seemed a waste of money. I haven't had all my other test results back yet, but I'm guessing if I need any immunes treatment, that will be the same regardless of my "method" of actually getting pregnant won't it? I'm sorry to offload on here, but I have no-one to talk to...... Just to add to the fun, I have a lump in my breast (in fact SIX medical students found it...long story!) and am off to see my GP about that on Tuesday.







Also, should I just be upfront with Jaya and tell her Peny's views?? http://static.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/Smileys/classic/embarrassed.gif

Hope - I did have the wrong procedure in mind when I said £350 ^idiot^ sorry :-[ In Athens they charge 1500 euros for the hysteroscopy.

Moog - good luck for 26th ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^

Loll - thanks for your earlier message ^hugme^ it gives me hope! :)

Take care everyone
GIa Tooxxx


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## georgie9 (Sep 18, 2008)

Hi Gia,


Just had to reply to you.  I have been watching this thread again recently as it is my old stomping ground and has very fond memories.  I just wanted to say to you that I have a friend who did IVF with very poor response about 3 or 4 times, then went for DE in Prague, got Pregnant but sadly lost it at 7 weeks.  She is now 21 weeks pregnant with twins (one blue and one pink  ) after doing a more natural cycle back in the london fertility clinic WITH HER OWN EGGS.  Very low dose drugs that gave her far better a response than anything she has had before.  She was initially told that her reserve was so low that IVF was unlikely to work.


I hope you don't mind me telling you that but maybe it will help you to make a decision.


On the other hand DE is always there for you as a fantastic option... and one not to be frightened of.  I finally made the leap to DE and at last can say... for the first time in my life... that I am actually pregnant.  Very early days so I am not shouting about it just yet.  I was in 2 minds as to whether to come back to the thread to say, (especially after your recent experience) but if it can in any way give all of you girls some hope and positivity, then it was the right thing to do.  Happy to chat anytime


My love to you all and be assured that you will make the right decision and even if it takes a while, you will have a baby at the end of it.  Very good luck.


Moog... thinking about you very much today.  May you have a great harvest.


Lots of love,


Georgie xxx


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

New home this way ladies --------> http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=243206.new#new


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