# BFN - where do I get some PMA from?



## sunfizz (May 4, 2005)

I know the way I feel isn't special, I know we're pretty ordinary, with ordinary chances of success, so why did I dare to think we'd be one of the lucky ones?  I feel such a feeble failure - I see so many incredibly strong people here on FF, who've been through so much and still seem able to stay bright - how do you do it  

We've had one ICSI which was a pretty smooth run, all going like clockwork right up to AF's arrival with a vengeance and the BFN this morning, and I now feel like it's the end of the world. I've spent the 2ww listening to positive thinking CDs and taking it easy and now am crushed under the weight of my own stupid disappointment.  I'm done with feeling pos-pos-pos-pos-positive.  It doesn't work.  

Sorry this is a bit self-indulgent.  It's nice to have this place where everyone understands what you're going through.  Best wishes and   to everyone going through same.


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

sunfizz, i'm so sorry you got a BFN hun. this whole tx game is soooooo very hard and takes so much out of us doesn't it  i had 2 cycles of ivf that went very smoothly but both were BFN's  so i do know where you are right now   i was not able to go on with tx (mentally) and did feel a failure for a long time and like i had let everyone down, but it's not like that, you are a strong person to have done tx in the first place and you will pick yourself up and carry on hun it's just going to take some time hun   all i can sugest is you take as much time as you need and don't feel pressured into making any decisions until you are ready

hope this makes sense and has helped a little, sending you massive    

pam xx


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## TLZ (Feb 27, 2007)

Hi Sunfizz

Just wanted to say that I agree with what Pam has said ... don't rush into anything now, take your time and give yourself permission to feel sad and low - this is a tough nut to crack but you are doing so well  

Fertility Friends has become my lifeline in the dark times because nobody else understands like the ladies (and gents!) on here - bless them  

Lean on us hun ....

TLZ x


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## tom+jerry (Jan 2, 2008)

Sunfizz

Just wanted to send you some  .

I remember the pain  of my BFN on 1 Jan 08 and it was so so hard to deal with but it does get better in time. I discovered this site that day in my depths of despair and all can say is thank god for this site.

Remember we're all here and importantly understand what a rollercoaster TTC is.

Hopefully your review meeting with the clinic will help give you some answers also. 

Take care
x


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