# If I found my own donor



## becks46 (Mar 5, 2006)

Would they have to have finished having their family?  MY best friend has offered me her eggs, however she hasn't started having children yet and doesn't see it happening in the forseeable future.  She is 32.

Thanks
Becks


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## Yxx (Jul 17, 2008)

It really depends on your clinics procedures.

My sister offered.  She is 32 and has no kids and doesn't ever want any.  They have said no to me using her as my donor as there is still a chance she could change her mind and if for an unknown reason her ovaries are damaged during the collection it could affect our relationship if she then isn't able to get pregnant herself.

My other sister also offered and has a DS.  BUT I've said no to her as she wants another one to complete her family.

I can only suggest you phone your clinic and see what they say.

Yxx


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## Essex Girl (Apr 3, 2005)

HI Becks

I had DE from my sister.  She already had 2 children but wanted to keep her options open, and we were told there was a risk if the ovaries were damaged during EC but that it was unlikely.

There are 2 problems with using a donor who has not had children herself:

1  The donor needs to stand back from any child that results from the donation - it is not their child - and if the donor does not have her own child, she may feel more possessive towards your child, which in turn could cause difficulties for your future relationship with both her and the child.

2  You don't know how fertile she is.  Most IF problems only come to light once people start TTC.

Sorry, I don't want to sound too negative, but just thought I should flag these issues up - it is wonderful that she has offered to do this for you.  Good luck!

Essex Girl x


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