# Dogs??



## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Hi all,

Hope all your journeys are going in the right direction and you are all well  

I just have a quetion re animals, well 2dogs in fact!

I have 2, both very nice natured, a spaniel king charles and a very old lurcher cross. Does anyone know if there are any implications re having dogs and if so what they are? When i made the initial enquiry i was asked about animals and i mentioned them and the sw said thats fine but just wanted to ask you all, if thats ok  

Also, while i am asking things, as some of you may know i am hoping to be approved for age 0-3 but am a bit worried about how to answer this question if asked ' why do you choose that age and especially as you can have your own birth children'

My reasons are due to feeling this is the age i can most likely cope with due to experience and possible less issues the younger they are (not health i know) but its not to say i wouldn't like to consider older in the future.

I have been shot down on adoption uk forum for posting a thread saying i would like a young one so i  am a bit wary of saying this and the best way for it to come accross where as on here everyone has been lovely in saying i should stick to my guns and there is nothing wrong wanting young etc etc.

Any help on this would be appreciated xxx


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## herbaltea (Apr 9, 2003)

Hiya  

Just wanted to say I have 2 dogs too. When I started the adoption process before (5 years ago), a sw had an intital visit and did ask about the dogs. She could see they were laid back and we told her they were both good with children. On a positive she did also say having pet(s) can greatly benefit some children   I think they do have to do a 'risk analysis' type thing on the dogs though!!!


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## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

Hiya

I have a completely mad working cocker spaniel puppy  and he has never been an issue either with my sons adoption or our fostering 

 on your journey 

xx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Hey Herbaltea and suzie,

Many thanks for your replies - i feel better now.

I didn't think they would be a problem from the sw's reaction when i told her on the phone but just wanted to double check wiv all you girlies  

Thanks again kk xxxx


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## Maccer (Feb 2, 2010)

Hi,

We have two lively 18 month Springer spaniels  , they are great with kids although they can also be boisterous, but I know they wouldn't be a problem, they are more likely to lick someone to death before getting any sort of violent reaction out of them, but I understand why they need to know about the pets in the household.  I think the dogs will love the new addition to our home. I am sure your dogs will too.  

Kittykat, I also think you need to stick with what you feel more comfortable with when it comes to the age of the child you are looking at adopting, though I am sure your SW will go through all the options with you.

Mx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Thank you maccer - really appreciate this!!

I can always count on all you on here being so kind and helpful!! 

Thanks again   xxxx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

kittykat1234 said:


> I have been shot down on adoption uk forum for posting a thread saying i would like a young one so i am a bit wary of saying this and the best way for it to come accross where as on here everyone has been lovely in saying i should stick to my guns and there is nothing wrong wanting young etc etc.


i've only ever lurked on adoption uk, and tbh it scares me a bit. they all seem so doom and gloom...


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## Maccer (Feb 2, 2010)

katie c said:


> I've only ever lurked on adoption UK, and TBH it scares me a bit. they all seem so doom and gloom...


Ditto, I don't know why it is so intimidating, but I will keep on 'lurking' because they do have some good information on there.

Mx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Yer the message boards are quite off putting and although they are all true stories it just seems all very negative!! Well most of it is anyway- had some lovely ladies message me but some of the stories off woman who have adopted older children do seem to be very scary!
My first thread on there was asking for anyone who been placed with a under 1 yr old to chat with me and i got completely shot down!!  

xxx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

Maccer said:


> Ditto, I don't know why it is so intimidating, but I will keep on 'lurking' because they do have some good information on there.
> 
> Mx


i sometimes speak to a lady on another forum who's recently adopted a 14 month old girl  and she told me to avoid it like the plague as it does seem to be dominated by people who've had negative experiences

there does seem to be a general opinion on there that if anyone posts anything nice and positive, they're bragging or rubbing others noses in it. can't be doing with that kind of attitude


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Ohhhh good, i am glad it wasn't just me then who thought it was negative and off putting!! Yer they do have a lot about single adopters and i have got chatting to a couple of nice ladies but the majority are extremely negative  

So where abouts are you on your journey? xxx   xxxx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

sorry just been away eating my tea...had tacos, my mouth is on fire. so having to have a glass of white purely for medicinal reasons you understand 

we're right at the beginning...deciding. basically we've had 2 failed IVFs, both which had poor fertilisation, and have been told a third go has only a 10% chance as my eggs are old and knackered. 

so we're getting a 2nd opinion. if they concur we're moving on. if they don't...well i'm not sure. part of me hopes they will...

i've never been broody or even wanted to be pregnant which is ironic since we've been trying over three years and had 2 IVFs.  to me pregnancy and new born babies is a ways to a means, and the goal is having a family. i love children and teenagers so missing the new born bit doesn't really worry me

i used to think that made me some sort of unmaternal monster and i was being 'punished' for this by not conceiving. i'm now thinking differently. maybe we were _meant_ to adopt iyswim? maybe this way something good can come out of all the disappointment and heartache?

that sounds terribly affected  but i hope you understand what i mean. i'm as far from a pretentious person as you could meet 

what's your story? 

(sorry this has naff all to do with dogs btw)


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Hahahahha i am on the rose too, got an awful cold which only wine will cure  

If you do decide to adopt and don't mind not going for the young ones and like older children you will move through quicker as most ppl want younger children and the older one are the harder to place. If you get BMP and CWW you will see the amount of older kids to that of younger.

Sorry to hear about your IVF attempts- i am a great beleiver in fate and whats meant to be and so maybe this is your chosen path  

Well i am 30,single and have wanted to adopt for quite some time now but wanted to wait till i was (a) at least 30 and (b) better off financially. My ex didnt want kids of his own never mind adopting so thats what split us up in the long run!!

Had my info meeting 2 weeks ago, got CRB checks tomorrow then will have the first screening home visit from the sw!

I am doing tonns of reading,booked on 2 courses with Adoption Uk on 2 different topics,started doing vol work at a nursery and am v v lucky that i have a huge support network, mostly made up of friends with and without children,different races and married and not married etc etc - had lots of child care experience too  

I have fallen in love with a little girl on BMP and i can't stop thinking about her!! I have joined and subcribed for a month and she is still on their site and also in the feb issue of the paper  . Just soooooooooooooo wish i was nearer being approved!!!

Good luck with which ever route you take and keep in touch xxx


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

kittykat1234 said:


> Hahahahha i am on the rose too, got an awful cold which only wine will cure
> 
> If you do decide to adopt and don't mind not going for the young ones and like older children you will move through quicker as most ppl want younger children and the older one are the harder to place. If you get BMP and CWW you will see the amount of older kids to that of younger.
> 
> ...


I have a bad cold too and also seen a lovely little boy on bmp it is sad when you see such lovely children waiting for a home. How old is the child you have seen is it a very young girl ?


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Bloody colds hey  

Ohh have you, describe him to me?

She is 1, quite near the bottom of the page on the website,lilac short sleeved top on - just BEAUTIFUL

They are all gorgeous and if i thought i could cope with them all i would but thats obviously not an option. Her bm used during pregnancy which is something i am reading lots about and 1 of the courses i am booked on is about parental misuse of drugs and alcohol and its definately something i feel i could cope with . 

She is just, for me, excatly what i am looking for. I have no preference on sex or heritage,am open to misuse of substances and know the perfect child doesnt exist but honestly never thought i could fall in love with a picture  

Anyway i am gonna mention it tomorrow or monday if no sw are there tomorrow and will see whats said. I know its a dream at the moment as no where near approval but you don't know till you try!


Hope your cold gets better!

I am off for a nice hot bath and my book on transratial adoption and hopefully to dream about the little darling   xxx
xxxx


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