# Calling all single women part 13



## Sharry

Happy Chatting


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## Rose39

Happy Birthday Jovi! Hope you have a lovely day!

   

Rose xx


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## suitcase of dreams

Happy B'day Jovi, and belated happy b'day Blueytoo - sorry I missed it...have been rather caught up in my desperate dash to Brno!

Suitcase
x


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## wizard

Hope you have a lovely day Jovi.

Wizard x


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## acrazywench

Jovi - hope you have a fantastic day. 

Blueytoo - belated birthday wishes, hope you had a lovely day. 

x


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## indekiwi

*Jovigirl, may all your dreams come true in the year ahead, and have a very special day today.

A-M & poppet xx*


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## ♥JJ1♥

Jovi have a lovely day


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## bluprimrose

happy happy birthday jovi.  hope you have a wonderful day.

and hello to everyone else - hope you're all doing well.

sorry i've been a bit quiet recently - work has been all-consuming, but i've been thinking about you all and checking in to see how you're doing.

lol

bpxx


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## some1

Happy Birthday Jovi!!!  Have a great day!    

Some1

xx


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## Felix42

Happy Birthday Jovi!!

& a belated one to Blueytoo!

BP, hope work calms down for you soon.  

Love & hugs, Felix xx


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## cocochanel1

Happy Birthday Jovi xxxx


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## Damelottie

Many Happy returns and all my love Jovi

Love

Clary and Baby xx


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## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Jovi, hope you are having a lovely day  

Lou-Ann x


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## bingbong

Jovi



I really hope that you have the most amazing year ahead 

bingbong x


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## caramac

Happy Birthday Jovi!!!


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## kylecat

Hope you are having a lovely day Jovi - many happy returns!  

Kylecat xxx


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## lulumead

happy birthday jovi, hope you have been spoilt and had lots of treats.xx


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## Fraggles

Jovi happy birthday and a belated one to blueytoo.


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## ♥Jovial♥

Wow THANK YOU everyone    

Despite being at work have had a lovely day    At the last minute arranged to meet a friend for a drink who I haven't seen for too long, only had time for a couple with it being a school night but so good to have girly chats and a few drinks ..... have planned a girly night in already - both got way too much catching up to do we just couldn't fit it all in    

Think I will settle down with the dog and watch some Twilight    Mr Perfect may be eluding me but there's always Mr Cullen  

Thanks again,
Love
Jovi x


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## caramac

Ooooh! Great idea Jovi - I might watch New Moon (for the 5th time!) and fantasize about a werewolf/vampire sexy sandwich!


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## suitcase of dreams

what is it with you girls and vampires?! I mean, I enjoyed the books, but that pale chap does nothing for me


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## caramac

Maybe try a werewolf instead then Suity?  

When I went to see New Moon for the 3rd time at the cinema and Jacob whips his top off to wipe blood from Bella's forehead I did a really loud "Whoo-woo!" and no-one else did that time (they had both previous trips to see it), resulting in the rest of the audience laughing at me.


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## Fraggles

Suity I am so with you, preferred the original vampires in interview with a vampire but I am sure a few others on this thread will claim never to heard of the film because of their age. In which case I suggest they get it out and see what good looking really is.

F x


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## caramac

Lol! Fraggles I remember that film, but still think that Twilight is the best vampire movie ever. It's not so much that he is super duper good looking, it's the totally unrealistic, madly in love, want to die to be together type romance I enjoy. Oh, to have someone feel that way about me.....


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## Lou-Ann

Mr Cullen does nothing for me either, but I must admit I thought that Jacob had a fit body  . 

Jovi, I hope you are enjoying your Edward fix 

Lou-Ann x


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## ♥Jovial♥

Lou-Ann I did notice that about Jacob  

Love Interview with A Vampire ..... that actually deserves another watch must look out for that.

Caramac if you enjoy the unrealistic, madly in love type of romance have you seen The Notebook?  Amazing film   and another I've watched several times


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## bingbong

Can't not comment on a Twilight discussion. I certainly wouldn't turn My Cullen down, there is just something about him. Sounds like a good birthday Jovi  

bingbong x


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## Fraggles

Mr Cullen is pale and pasty. 

x


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## ♥JJ1♥

anyone seen this iphone app apparently there are more ivf apps
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1245818/Britains-iPhone-baby-born-couple-tried-years-conceive.html

/links


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## suitcase of dreams

If only it were as simple as an iphone app for us.....


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## Fraggles

Do iphone apps now come with an endless supply of tested donor sperm and the equipment to do an iui? Or is that still awaiting for apple to develop that?

F x


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## ♥JJ1♥

Maybe we could suggest and bluetooth them at the right times!!


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## lulumead

one of my mates is developing i-phone apps..I'll suggest it


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## bingbong

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=235685.0

birthday celebration that way 

bingbong x


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## cocochanel1

Hi does anyone have any experience of electromagnetic field protection?? If so do you recommend any products in particular please?

Coco xxx


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## Mifi

Sorry Coco can't help with that one      never heard of it   

Ladies can I please ask your advice as i'm freaking a little    just had my AMH test results back from GP which is 11.9pmol/L which is low    I've applied to egg share again but with a result like that it is highly unlikely isn't it?     

What do you think    

Love FM XXXX


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## Fraggles

Fullmoon have a look at the poor responders board or low amh but I actually think 11.9 is great. I am 2.1 and others are 0. I would be delighted if I got your figures. It is below normal fertility but not that low.

Also a couple of girls got natural BFP's with amh is the 2. something range and I think 0.something too with own eggs.

I am not sure about egg sharing I am afraid as not looked into it but perhaps someone of one of those boards can help.

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=236020.75
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=217211.630

Sorry to hear you are freaking.

x


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## Mifi

Thanks Fraggles much appreciated    I think alot of yesterday was shock and reality that my biological clock is really ticking but at 35 I would have liked to have seen that I was still within the normal fertility range    

Love FM XXXX


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## bingbong

FM    I hope that you can still egg share.

bingbong x


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## Rose39

Fraggles - I just saw it's your birthday today! Hope you have had a lovely day hunny!      

Rose xx


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## bingbong

WooHoo Fraggles,



 
bingbong x


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## ♥JJ1♥

Fraggles I hope that you had a fantastic brithday!!

L x


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## Fraggles

Ahhh thanks yes had a wonderful birthday ...... studying again like the last five years but plan next year to be celebrating it with triplets and a man!


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## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Fraggles   , glad that you have had a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


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## caramac

Happy Birthday Fraggles!!! Hope you get your birthday wishes for next year


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## sweet1

Happy birthday Fraggles!!!


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## Maya7

Fraggles, still a  bit of time to enjoy your Birthday - just got in in time -   



 

Maya


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## cocochanel1

Happy Birthday Fraggles!

Coco xxx


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## indekiwi

_Happy birthday Fraggles - sorry to hear that study has dominated your day today, but really hope that the next year sees your dreams become reality    _

_A-Mx_


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## some1

Happy Birthday Fraggles !!!!    

Some1

xx


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## Mifi

Thanks BB       

Happy Birthday Fraggles     

Love FM XXX


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## lulumead

happy birthday Fraggles...xxxx


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## suitcase of dreams

Sorry I missed your B'day Fraggles (been on a plane all day...) - hope you had a lovely day   
Suitcase
x


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## Damelottie

Happy belated birthday Fraggles


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## GIAToo

Another belated birthday wish - hope you had a nice day xxx   

GIA Tooxx


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## GIAToo

Hi FM
Just read your post about AMH.    Did the clinic say which scale your AMH is? there are 2 , ngl and Pmol

Ovarian Fertility Potential                pmol/L                ng/mL

Optimal Fertility                            28.6 - 48.5        4.0 - 6.8
Satisfactory Fertility                    15.7 - 28.6          2.2 - 4.0
Low Fertility                                2.2 - 15.7          0.3 - 2.2
Very Low / undetectable            0.0 - 2.2              0.0 - 0.3
High Level                                    > 48.5            >6.8  

Sorry to put a downer on things, but it would seem that yours and Fraggles results are based on different measurements.  The good news is that, as Fraggles has said, lots of women do get pregnant with low AMH.  Mine is 2.2 ng/ml.

I'm not sure what the criteria is for egg sharing      
GIA Tooxx


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## Mifi

Many thanks GIA2 much appreciated    I still am coming to terms with it   

Huge congrats on your recent BFP sending you lots of sticky vibes          

Love FM XXXX


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## Fraggles

Hi

My results were pmol too.

We are looking at arranging a single women's meet up for all those close (ish) to London. Please follow link if you are interested and vote for date that suits.

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=236575.0;topicseen

F x


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## some1

For anyone who remembers Hollysox - she used to post on here, but now posts in the over 40's area (http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=140626.330 ). She has her BFP after 6 IUIS, 4 OEIVFs, 7DEIVFs and 4 miscarriages. She has a first scan on Tuesday, so please send her lots of    - let this be the one!!!

Some1

xx


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## smilingandwishing

Hey ladies,

May I join you? 

I'm waiting for my first scan on Thursday 27th May 

Smiling


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## Fraggles

Hi Smiling

How are you doing? Wow how incredible first time BFP - where did you go?

F x


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## smilingandwishing

Hi there Fraggles.

I'm at the Lister.  It was a shock (a lovely one), I thought first time I'd just find out about how I responded to medication etc and couldn't believe the pee-stick.

I'm now on count down to 27th May and first scan - will feel a whole lot better once I see that heart beat.

Where are you having treatment?

Smiling xx


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## GIAToo

Smiling and wishing - that's brilliant news!!      My scan is on 25th May and I can't wait! (I'm at the Lister too) I think I will be reassured (for about 5 minutes   ) when I see a heartbeat.  Good luck for 27th!    

Fraggles - how you doing?   

Hi to everyone else!   

GIA Tooxx


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## Mifi

Smiling and GIA2 all the very best of luck for your first scans             

Smiling would you mind sharing your details of tx such as timings etc. I feel like im banging my head against a wall with all the DIUIs ive had and still no sucess   

Love FM XXXXXXX


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## smilingandwishing

Hi Fullmoon.

I had first scan on 9th April on day 2 of period and started that night with a Gonal F injection - 150ml.  I did those injections every other day.  I then had a second scan on day 8 - they said there was one follicle doing nicely and a second a little small, both on left hand side.  That second scan was a Thursday so they told me to do home ovulation kits twice a day on Saturday and Sunday and call them if I got a LH surge, if not to go back for a scan at 10am on Monday morning. 

Weekend came and went with no LH surge and at my scan on Monday morning there were now two good follicles - one at 20 and one at 17.5. I was told to take a Gonal-F injection at 7pm that night and the ovitrelle trigger at 10:30 pm and return to the clinic at 3pm on the Wednesday for the insemination.

So Wednesday came and I went into the treatment room.  Not all the sperm had survived the thawing process and the count was approx 3 million, however they said they had great motility at 80%.  I was inseminated at 3.30pm - 41 hours after trigger.  I was told I could leave straight away or I could stay on the coach for as long as wanted.  The nurse said she had read a report which said you increased your chances of success by staying laying down for 15 minutes after insemination by 25%. I stayed there for about half an hour.

I went straight to my mums and spent all evening on the sofa. I had took the next day off work as holiday and just lazed all around all day.  I also didn't have a bath until the Saturday.

The thing I have learned by being on this site is that this whole process is just not scientific. Two people can have the same history and have the same treatment and get different results.  I think our chances are different every month and I was just incredibly lucky and blessed to get the outcome I got. I do also belive strongly in PMA and although there are days when I struggle with it, I have done a lot of visualisation and living as though I have what I want already.

Wishing you best of luck FM - feel free to PM me if you want to knw anything else.

Love, Smiling xx


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## Fraggles

Hi

Just a quickie we are having a singles meet up in London in July. There were 5 dates to choose from but now this is down to the three most popular. If you have voted before can you go and revote as this will be the decider and if you haven't already voted and can get to London what are you waiting for.

Thread is http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?action=post;topic=236575.30;num_replies=34

Hope to see you there.

F x


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## Damelottie

Smilingandwishing - HUUGe congratulations     

FM - Always lot of      

LL xx


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## smilingandwishing

Thanks LL  - Alfie is gorgeous!!


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## Mifi

LL thank you so much for all the     as always gratefully received   

Smiling thanks so much for sharing that     our cycles are pretty much the same really apart from I have 75 iu of Gonal-F everyday and Pregnol as trigger and I always go back to work after as my IUI app is my lunch hour even if it is at 10:00am. I have had a couple of cycles where I have gone home after but still BFN, but I do have a bath everyday as I dont have a shower which is really annoying. I am careful though not to have it too hot as I know thats not good. PMA maybe an issue as well but not really sure how to get over that as I think I have pretty much ran out     I know that sounds negative but after 13 2WW I just cant bear to think positive and then come crashing down to earth with huge bump when I get another BFN    its a toughy. If money wasnt an issue I would try hypnosis or something like that but its all just so expensive    oh well scan tomorrow and estimate basting Thurs so here we go again!!!!


Thanks again ladies    

Love FM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


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## smilingandwishing

FM - try a book called 'The Secret' I found it really helped - all about PMA


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## Mifi

Will do thanks smiling


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## morrigan

FM - on the cheap Hypno front- I can highly recomend the cd Ive been listening to for chilling you out called Getting Pregnant Hypnotherapy for fertility and conception - it definatley made me more relaxed and when i stopped listening I got worked up again.  I friend gave it to me- she brought it and got her long awaited BFP before opening it- its now on my ipod so happy to lend it out if you PM me. (slight disclaimer- I got BFN but my 2WW was alot calmer until it came to testing time! not sure anything would chill that out!)


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## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday BingBong, hope you have a lovely day   . 

Love 
Lou-Ann x


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## Maya7

Happy Birthday BingBong!!!  Enjoy your day!



 

Maya


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## caramac

Hey happy birthday Bingbong! Another Gemini girl eh? My birthday was on Sunday!


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## some1

Happy Belated Birthday Caramac!  Hope you had a wonderful day

       

Some1

xx


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## cocochanel1

Happy Birthday Bing - what a birthday present you have this year!!!!!!!


Coco xxx


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## bingbong

Thank you for the birthday wishes   

Caramac you kept that quiet    I hope that you had a good day though   

bingbong x


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## lulumead

happy birthdays BB & caramac.xxx


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## Hollysox

Hi everyone....I haven't been on this thread in ages so most of you probably wont kknow who I am   

I wanted to say hello especially to those of you who tracked me down on the goldies thread to say congrats on my recent    I had my 1st scan yesterday and saw the heartbeating away !  I have prayed so hard for this baby to be ok and am thankful someone has heard      This is the first time in all my tx's I have ever seen a healthy heart beating away and it was such an amazing experience.....I am still nervous of course but hopeful this little one of mine stays safe      

Take care everyone 
xxx

Ps Happy Birthday to those celebrating


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## Damelottie

Hollysox     - wonderful news on the scan


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## Hollysox

Thanks hun    Just having a fight with my profile info at the moment !!!!  May have to bring in help to get it sorted out    

x


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## Lou-Ann

Hollysox, congratulations on your BFP and fantastic news about the scan. Wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy   .

Caramac, happy belated birthday   .

Lou-Ann x


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## smilingandwishing

Hello Ladies,

Hope you're all well.

First scan for me today and can't believe how nervous I am.  I have everything crossed that I will see the wonderful heartbeat.  

Sorry for the me post - am just a bit beside myself today   

Smiling xx


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## some1

Hello Hollysox - lovely to see you on the singles threads and totally wonderful news about the scan - is it sinking in yet?

Some1

xx


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## morrigan

Smiling I'm sure it will be fine - thinking of you - look forward to hearing about it all


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## some1

Smiling - been thinking about you today, hope your scan went well!

Some1

xx


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## caramac

Thanks for the birthday wishes everyone!


Hollysox - congrats on your BFP!!!   


SaW - hope the scan went okay today and you got to see the heartbeat for the first time!!!


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## smilingandwishing

Hello Ladies,

I went for my scan today and am thrilled to be able to say it was good news. One beautiful, gorgeous heartbeat. The scan was so clear, you could see the head and bum!!!  I took my mum with me and she hasn't quite stopped crying yet. I have to admit to feeling a bit weepy myself - I am just so happy.

My due date is 13th January - wow!!

Good luck to everyone and thank you so much everyone for your good wishes and your thoughts - it just helped me so much.

Love to all, Smiling xxx


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## Fraggles

Hi Smiling

When did you tell her that you were having treatment?

F x


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## kizzi79

Fantastic news Smiling           

I am so pleased for you, Love Krissi  xx


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## caramac

Fantastic news Smiling! I'm so pleased for you.


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## morrigan

brill news


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## Lou-Ann

SaW, so pleased that your first scan went well   

Lou-Ann x


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## some1

Great news Smiling, so pleased for you!

Some1

xx


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## smilingandwishing

Thank you Ladies

Fraggles - I'm very blessed I have a really close relationship with my Mum. I told her two years ago when I first strated to consider the idea seriously and she has been with my whilst I went through the dilemma of deciding it was the way for me.  She has been a rock and when I was doing my gonal-F injections she came around each evening and just sat next to me as I injected. Of course, she wishes that I was in a good relationship and not single, but she has given me her blessing.

S x


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## Fraggles

S

That is lovely, I am so happy for you

F x


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## Maya7

Glad all went well at the scan Smiling ... I still remember mine, in fact I wont ever forget it as it was so beautiful it made me cry.  You're so lucky to have your mum's support, she sounds like a star.

 
Maya


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## Mifi

Fantastic news smiling im so happy for you    take care of yourself and LO        your mum sounds lovely mine still gives me the silent treatment and ignores what im doing really


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## GIAToo

Smiling - that's fantastic news.    I took my Mum into my scan as well last week (the sonographer said my Dad could come in too but I wasn't having that!   )  Anyway, my Mum was so excited, but I was trying to keep a lid on it out of sensitivity to the other people in the waiting room.  Bless 'em, I felt really sorry for my parents 'cos I kept telling them to keep it down   .  
My due date is 2 days before yours   
GIA Tooxx


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## sweet1

fantastic news SaW - must be magical to see that first heartbeat.
helps as well so much if even one member of your family is behind you too.


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## ♥JJ1♥

great news smiling


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## smilingandwishing

Hello Ladies,

Hope you'e all well.

FullMoon - just wanted to send you good wishes and hope all went well on 28th.

Smiling x


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## cocochanel1

Smiling, where are you based?
Coco xx


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## ambergem

Lovely news Smiling. Glad it went so well   x


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## indekiwi

*Happy birthday Lou! Hope you have a wonderful day - and incredible year - ahead of you!*

*All our love*

*A-M & Poppet xxx*

*url=http://www.glitter-graphics.com]







*


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## some1

Happy Birthday Lou !!!!                  

Happy Birthday Patterdale !!!!                


Hope you both have a really lovely day

Some1

xx


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## wizard

Hope you have a lovely birthday Lou   

Wizard x


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## Maya7

Patterdale and Lou ... Are you twins   

Hope you both have a lovely birthday ...

 
Maya and J


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## bingbong

Oooh, two birthdays   

        

Lou and Patterdale I hope that you both have a wonderful day   

bingbong x


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## loubi

to both Patterdale and Lou....hope you have a lovely day


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## Mifi

Happy happy Birthday Patterdale & lou                                    

Hope all your wishes come true         

Love FM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX


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## Rose39

Happy Birthday to Patterdale and Lou - hope you have both had a lovely day with your LO's!     

Rose xx


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## acrazywench

Lou and Patterdale -         Hope you are both having fabulous days.

x


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## caramac

Happy Birthday ladies! Hope you've had lovely days!


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## Lou-Ann

Happy birthday Lou and Patterdale. I hope you have both had a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


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## ♥Jovial♥

Happy Birthday Lou & Patterdale



Hope you have both had lovely days
Jovi x


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## ♥JJ1♥

Lou and Patterdale hope you had lovely days


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## RichmondLass

Belated birthday wishes to you both!rlx


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## ambergem

Happy belated birthday Lou & Patterdale   xx


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## some1

Happy Birthday Muddy!

     

Some1

xx


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## bingbong

Muddy I hope that you are having a wonderful day    

bingbong x


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## ♥JJ1♥

Muddy hope you are enjoying your special day
l x


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## RichmondLass

Happy Birthday Muddy!!!

Can't remember where I read a post from Coco about a Southampton meet but I am hoping to book a week in Chichester Coco - first or second week of July.  Fancy coming over to spend a bit of time with me and Baby G?  Anyone else in the vicinity?? Will let you know dates as soon as I can find availability.

RLxxx


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## Maya7

Happy birthday Muddy!!!  Hope you had a lovely day - you certainly had fabulous weather ... were you slumming it in Rick Steins too?

 

Maya and J


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## Damelottie

Have a lovely day Muddy


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## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Muddy, hope you have had a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


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## indekiwi

*Happy birthday Muddy - hope you've had a blinder on such a beautiful sunny day!*

*Belated happy birthday to Patterdale too (apologies for the lack of congrats on your day  )*

*A-M & Poppet xx*

**


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## Fraggles

Hi

Just a reminder for any singles interested there is a meet up on Saturday 31st July in central London if anyone is keen to come along. We are about to decide venue so any suggestions let me know.

Please see http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=236575.msg3851611#msg3851611 and remember to bookmark for easy referencing.

Good luck.

F x


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## Grace10704

Hi All
Wondered if I could ask your opinions??  I have rather wonderfully already been offered a donor for a cycle next month (having only been put on the donor match list the clinic this morning!).  I am freaking out a bit though for what might be a silly reason so wanted to see what you all thought?

3 years ago when I was trying for my first boy I was offered this very same donor!  I didn't go with him then as I knew he had already been offered to a friend who was going for treatment the same month.  As it happened it turned out she didn't use him (didn't know that at the time).  However, my freakiness is because I am worrying that if he is still available 3 years later does that mean he is not very successful?  I do have time to ask for another option for next month but am thinking maybe I'm just being too silly.  I know I can't have the same donor as my boy as he is not available & not responding to requests for sibling sperm donation.

Help!  Any thoughts gratefully received even if its only to tell me to get a grip!
By the way, have just checked with the clinic & he does have proven fertility.


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## ♥JJ1♥

Ask your clinic about his successes, I think you are in the UK aren't you, so he won't have done his 10 family quota. If it feels right then go for him, if it doesn't then ask for another, maybe it is fate that you have been offered him again!!

L x


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## morrigan

It's a difficult one if he has proven fertility I presume that he already has some children- could it be he wasn't available for a while because he was reserved but now isn't - I'm not sure how it works in the uk.

I would share the same concerns with clinic and see what they say.

Maybe he's come back to you for a reason!


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## GIAToo

Just a quick question - what does "proven fertility" actually mean?  My donor has had "proven pregnancies" but obviously in some cases (including mine so far) those pregnancies have not led to live births.  I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with the sperm if a pregnancy doesn't continue (in my case I'm sure it's my old eggs   ) but I'm just saying that "proven fertility" may not mean lots of actual children.
Not sure if I am making any sense or indeed if I am just adding to your confusion - sorry - just something I have been thinking about myself. 

The others have more practical advice like going back to the clinic with your concerns/questions    
good luck
GIA Tooxxx


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## ♥JJ1♥

sometimes times you have to ask them is proven fertility live births or pregnancies. 

GAIT how are you doing I have been thinking about you over the last week, I hope that you have support around you.

L x


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## GIAToo

JJ1 - not great to be honest, but I'll get there.  Been having to go to a few job interviews this week and go to work and all I want to do is tell everyone to get lost!   I have my follow-up at the Lister next week and I'm going to see Peny at Serum on 21st July, plus a few days on the Greek Riviera with my Mum   So it's not all bad and I'm just gathering information to help me make my next decision (s).  How are you hun?     
GIA Tooxxxxx


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## bingbong

GIA2    I've been thinking about you lots too. 

Grace that's exciting about being matched so soon, I hope that you work out what to do.

bingbong x


----------



## Fraggles

Comeon Bing keeping me in suspense - do you any news ?


----------



## bingbong

no news Fraggles, posted on the bumps thread but they did nothing more exciting than check my BP and wee   

bingbong x


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Sam and AmeliaCooper! Hope you are both having a lovely day ! xxx

    ​
Some1

xx


----------



## indekiwi

*Sam, hope your girls do you proud today on your birthday! *

*A-M & Poppet*

*url=http://www.glitter-graphics.com]







*


----------



## indekiwi

*Amelia Cooper, many happy returns on your special day!*

*A-M & Poppet*

*url=http://www.glitter-graphics.com]







*


----------



## Maya7

Happy birthday Sam      Enjoy your day with the girls...

AC, have a lovely day on your birthday!  

 
Maya


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Sam and AC, hope you are both having great days   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Sam and AC I hope that you both had lovely days with your LO's
XX


----------



## kylecat

Many happy returns Sam and Amelia Cooper - were you both born in the same year?!!

Hope you have both had a lovely day with your little girls!   

Love Kylecat xxx


----------



## Rose39

Happy Birthday Sam and AC! Hope you have both had a lovely day!     

Rose xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Many happy returns Sam and Amelia Cooper hope you have had a lovely day xxx


----------



## caramac

Happy Birthday ladies!!! Hope you had some cake to celebrate! Don't worry if you didn't as I just had some for you as my pudding!


----------



## acrazywench

Hope you've both had fantastic days.


----------



## ameliacooper

Girls

thanks so much for your wishes.  Have had a nice evening out and now lying in bed with my phone!

Inde - you sound so relaxed.  Can't wait to hear your news.

Thanks girls x


----------



## cocochanel1

Hi girls, can anyone advise me on the best private Fertility Clinic near Hereford for a friend please?
Coco xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Coco I really hope that your bleeding has stopped as it must have been such a terrible shock for you and LO- do rest up and take care  

I can't really help I have a friend who lives in the countryside there, but is pregnant naturally ! I would have thought maybe a post of the county/area thread. Bristol etc prob isn't too far
L x


----------



## going it alone

Thanks for the birthday wishes. I had a lovely day thanks. We went to the farm and tehn out fro a meal with my parents.
Am not sure if AC and I are the same age, I'm 37 now.

Sorry, can't help with Hereford clinics. But then again, I'd recommend mine to anyone but there are plenty on here who didn't rate it.

x


----------



## Grace10704

Coco - not sure if your friend is single?  If so I'm afraid JJ's suggestion of Bristol won't work as none of the clinics round here will treat single women - nearest is LWC in Cardiff which has a bit of a mixed reception (as in I think it was fine but I know at least one person who has recently had a poor experience there).  Cardiff isn't too far from Hereford though so might work & LWC also have a clinic in Swansea for specific treatments etc?  Alternatively I think there's the Midland Ferility Centre (think its called that?) in Birmingham area - don't know what they are like though.
Hope your day has improved & you are resting well now xxxx


----------



## some1

Hello everyone
I'm just feeling that today would be a good day to send a huge    to all the single ladies whatever their circumstances, think there are quite a few who could do with some virtual hugs right now

Some1

xx


----------



## Damelottie

Yes - it would be nice if this thread got going again. For good or bad chit chat x


----------



## going it alone

I must admit that I haven't posted here as often as I should.
Sam x


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Great minds think alike - I come on just to post hello really, wasn't sure where to post so thought this thread was the best place.  Just wanted to say that I'm not posting much of late as not a lot happening on the tx front for a couple of months.  But I am thinking of you all and reading - not managing to keep up as much as I like to though, for the first time in a few years I found myself not logging on every day, and it's so busy! Think my head needed some space, and no tx to rattle about    Has been nice to focus on other things for a while, but of course it's always there, definate case of head in the sand for now    I do have to read though to keep the dream alive, this is just a temporary set back (and time to shift a few stone!!) Have done some decorating and that was really good to distract me - need to get it finished now, I am determined all those little jobs I don't normally finish will get done this time!

Love to all 
Jovi xxxxx


----------



## Roo67

Some of you may remember Newgirlintown - she posted mainly of the reprofit thread.

I just wanted to let you all know that Emily and Rachel were born yesterday by C section, she said they are both good weights and doing well, mum is a little tender though.

  

R x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Roo that is fantastic news!


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Yes, thanks for posting Roo - lovely news, do send her my best when you next speak/text her   
Suitcase
x


----------



## Fraggles

Suity


Am thinking of you and have sent a message ahead to Brno to treat you well and send you home with what you truly deserve!!


F x


----------



## Damelottie

Ahh thats lovely Roo


----------



## some1

Roo - please pass on my congratulations to newgirl - fantastic news!

Jovi - well done on getting the decorating done, hope you manage to get all the fiddly jobs finished too!

Some1

xx


----------



## RichmondLass

Is it me or is it particularly quiet on the board? Rlx


----------



## some1

I've noticed it too RL.  Think there are a lot of people not posting/reading at the moment after recent events    Hope they all come back soon   


Some1

xx


----------



## Maya7

hi ... i find myself juggling two jobs at the minute (on a four day week) so am definitely under p.  not too much spare time to post.

I quite like this thread as a general one where we have singleness in common even if we are at different stages ... still waiting to hear the response to all the comments and questions raised in the 'please read this' thread though ... maybe that will help people decide whether they want to continue posting?  

The board does feel a bit low at the minute but since I've known it, it does pass through quieter periods.  Maybe with summer weather, real meet ups will be possible and a way in which to have people get to know each other better...winter is most probably the more popular time to post..  

 
Maya


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Coco I hope that you have a fantastic birthday on your special day- next brithday you'll have double the hugs!!

L x


----------



## Maya7

Coco - hope you enjoy the big 40!!... I had a really low key one as I wasnt so sure about the whole thing ... I survived it and have begun to enjoy life as an official grown up    ...

Your bump is proof that life begins at 40 ... embrace it!! (bump and the birthday!!)


             

 
Maya


----------



## lulumead

happy birthday Coco, hope you have a lovely day
xxxx


----------



## smilingandwishing

Happy Birthday Coco.

I was 40 in January. I wanted to cry into my vodka at first but then decided this year would be this year, booked my treatment and here i am!

40 really is the age to be!!

Smilingxx


----------



## RichmondLass

Happy Birthday Coco - it's not so bad. I've managed to survive it and am half way thorugh my next decade!!


----------



## bingbong

I hope that you have a great day Coco

bingbong x


----------



## Damelottie

Coco - I was dreading it so so much   . Then, like you, ended up celebrating it pg     . So it has been my most special birthday to date. Pictures with as huge bump - lush    


have a lovely day


----------



## caramac

Happy Birthday Coco!!! Hope you manage to relax and enjoy the big 4-0!!!! Have a lovely day and treat yourself to something nice. xx


----------



## Elpida

Coco - I hope you have a wonderful day - HAPPY BIRTHDAY   


E x


----------



## ambergem

Happy birthday Coco. Have a wonderful day xx


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Coco !  Hope you are having a lovely day, how wonderful to be celebrating your 40th with a bump!





Some1

xx


----------



## southern_angel

Happy Birthday Coco, enjoy your birthday bump


----------



## morrigan

Happy birthday coco


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy birthday Coco, hope you have had a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Fraggles

Coco Happy 30th Birthday. All these people saying Happy 40th, do they not know 40 is the new 30.

F x


----------



## Sima

Coco - I hope you had a lovely birthday.


----------



## Felix42

Coco, happy belated 40th. Hope you had a fantastic day. Great way to spend it - as pregnant lady!  

Love & hugs, Felix xx


----------



## hjanea

Bit late but happy birthday Coco!
Helen.xxx


----------



## bingbong

Felix



I hope that you are having a wonderful day with E. Hope to see you both soon 

bingbong x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Felix, I hope you're having a good one!

Lou-Ann x


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Felix!!!

Some1

xx


----------



## lulumead

Happy birthday felix. Hope you are having a lovely day.
xxx


----------



## Damelottie

Have a lovely day Felix xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Happy birthday Felix - hope you are having a lovely day.xxxx



Thank you to everyone for all of my lovely birthday wishes last week. The day was fun and I was treated to lunch at a stupendously lovely country hotel and had so many cards, presents, flowers I felt like a very lucky girl!

Coco xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Felix hope that you and E are having a lovely day


----------



## caramac

Felix!!!!


----------



## Mifi

Happy happy birthday Felix                

Love FM XXXX


----------



## Elpida

Felix - Happy Belated Birthday !!!!


E xxx


----------



## Rose39

Happy Birthday Sunnygirl1! Hope you have a lovely day!      

Rose xx


----------



## bingbong

happy birthday sunny! I hope that you have a lovely day and a wonderful year ahead 

Bingbong x


----------



## Fraggles

Happy birthday Sunnygirl.




F x


----------



## Elpida

Hope you have a great day Sunnygirl

E x x x


----------



## cocochanel1

Happy Birthday Sunny!
Coco xxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Happy Birthday Sunny x x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Sunny I hope that you have a lovely birthday
L x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy birthday Sunnygirl, hope you're having a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## lulumead

Hope today has been lovely. Happy Birthday    
xxx


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Sunnygirl!

Some1

xxx


----------



## sunnygirl1

Thanks Ladies for all of your Birthday wishes.  I had a family weekend (after rushing around for embryo transfer on Saturday.....) and just finished dinner with my best friend and her two boys - Pizza Express (classy!!)

Sunny xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Hi could anyone recommend a dongle please? I need one for infrequent use - so probably pay as you go - main reason for getting one is that if I end up in hospital I can access the web. I have broadband at home. Thanks, Coco xxx


----------



## blueytoo

Coco - the 3 pay as you go ones are the best as 3 have the best network for the UK. Mine is amazing, I had to use it in the house the other month as I was changing ISP at home and had a few days where I would have no net access otherwise. It was as fast as my home broadband (which is super fast!), I was very happy with it. 

I also used it last year for my business when it took BT ages to connect my internet at my warehouse. I was very happy with it then too.


----------



## bingbong

I would dispute that 3 have the best network. I'm with 3 for my mobile and although they have improved their network lately I still think that it is one of the poorer ones when I compare my reception to that of friends with Vodafone, Orange and O2. I have a friend who had a 3 dongle and changed to another network because he travels with work and found that most of the hotels that he stayed in had poor reception. I think that if you are in an area with good reception then it would be great. Maybe you could borrow someone's 3 phone and take it to the hospital to see what the reception there is like?? The good thing about 3 is that it tends to be cheaper, but I think that's because they know that with their reception it's the only way to get and keep customers, it's the only reason I'm with them and I keep vowing to change.

bingbong x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I have a vodaphone one and haven't has an problems, I paid a one off fee for it and then you can top it up as an when it is pay as you go.  My donor ended with a contract one, and then he bought me a T mobile one but that is a £1/50 a day fee. The other thing to do is see what is offered in the hospital as my dad had a bedside console that also had internet combined, some hospitals have wifi as well, both my ladt 2 hospitals did and it was an free to tap into maybe ring the PALS desk they are there to help and give pts info not just complaints!!

Good Luck
L x


----------



## cocochanel1

Thank you that is very helpful. And how much should I expect to pay for the device and pay as you go?
I've searched the networks and both look ok for southampton general hospital, but I will check for home too.
What is the difference between a dongle and a USB stick for wi fi - eg. this vodafone one?
http://shop.vodafone.co.uk/shop/mobile-broadband-devices/usb-modem-stick-topup-and-go-white?compatible=false&dfacid=1&cid=aff-aw-default-100908

Just checked 3 for my home and it says only outdoor coverage - I wonder what difference the walls of the house make? Maybe it is signal strength. So I think that probably means vodafone unless anyone else has a better suggestion?

THANKS for you help girls - really great!
Coco xxx

/links


----------



## blueytoo

You need to find the website for the independent governing body as that has the coverage maps on it and compares all the networks for mobile broadband - that is the one that shows the 3 does have the best coverage - well known industry fact and doubly so for 3G, they have the biggest network for that too. The companies themselves most likely aren't completely honest on their own websites about coverage - vodafone and orange definitely aren't!

I live in an area that is SO crap for mobile phone reception, despite Vodafone Business HQ being 1/2 a mile up the road. My 02 mobile struggles to get a signal in the house, 3 absolutely fine, vodafone, orange and t-mobile also useless despite all of them having masts less than a mile from my house too. Have used my 3 dongle in other places up and down the country and never had a problem with it but have experienced 02/vodafone/orange reception problems in places in London and other big cities too.

Best to check the site mentioned and find the best coverage for where you will use it most - make sure you check mobile broadband coverage and not mobile phone though as they are different. Then choose based on that if you don't intend to travel much with it.

Dongle is just another word for USB stick usually, a USB stick is what I have.


----------



## cocochanel1

Thanks you are so knowledgeable! I will google to find the site you mention. 
JJ1 thanks for your suggestion too - I just checked the maternity hospital website and they don't have wifi but it was worth looking at - thank you. 
Coco xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I am no IT expert my Vodaphone thing is just like a white USB memory stick it cost me about £45 and I bought it well over a year ago I use it when I go away at weekends, and I haven't topped it up yet.  The T mobile one and my donor's is on a little cord so dangles down, I don't know if that is the only difference!
L x


----------



## morrigan

Does anyone know if those things work abraod? oh and happy birthday Sunny.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I don't think they work abroad, or at least at a reasonable cost- My donor got his as he was doing some work in Ireland and then found it either wouldn't work or was v expensive, like your iphone turns it's wifi off due to high roaming costs. but maybe ask in one of the phone shops.


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Just thought I'd pop in and say a quick hello - been awol for a while.  Think of you all often and wishing you all lots of luck - will attempt to catch up to see where everyone is at .... my head is well and truely confused regards to tx hence not being on here much, I've had to put a bit of distance betweeen myself and tx/baby thoughts, was not helping my depression/anxiety.  Not decided if/when next go will be so devoting myself to losing some weight/getting healthier, getting some much needed jobs done round the house while I have some time out and try to work out what I want.

Love to you all - will hopefully be back with a clearer head sometime soon x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Jovial honey - with you there .... its great to see how everyone is doing - but am also undecided as to whether to continue with the baby thing..  Big hugs honey (looking fab btw!!)            

Take care everyone x x


----------



## ♥Jovial♥

Looking pretty damn good yourself missus! I know i couldn't handle treatment at the moment - maybe when everything else has settled down I will see it differently, but at the minute it's the last thing I could cope with.  We shall see what next year brings I think.  And between now and then shall live a little    xxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

With you there honey ... Yay to living a little!!!  Do feel like my life's been on hold and am not quite sure why??

Take care x x x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Jovi great to hear from you L x


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Wizard!  Hope you have a a lovely day

Some1

xx


----------



## Mifi

Happy Birthday Wizard hope you have a fab day      


       

Love FM XXXX


----------



## Betty-Boo

Happy Birthday Wizard!!  Have a lovely day x x


----------



## bingbong

Happy Birthday Wizard!!!! I hope that you are having a good day    

bingbong x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Wizard, hope you are having a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Sima

Happy Birthday Wizard


----------



## lulumead

Big     for your birthday Wizard.
xxxxx


----------



## RichmondLass

Hope you do something you like on your birthday Wiz        RLxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wizard thinking of you on your birthday
L x


----------



## Rose39

Happy Birthday Wizard! Hope you have had a lovely day    

Rose xx


----------



## indekiwi

Wizard, hope you've had a lovely day.   

A-Mx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

RL I hope that you have a lovely birthday and an extra special kiss from RL.



L x


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday RichmondLass!!!!  Hope you have a really lovely day and you get lots of sloppy kisses from RichmondLad!

Some1

xx


----------



## RichmondLass

Aw thanks ladies. It's tomorrow actually but today I am having a lovely hot stone massage ccourtesy of my neighbour. All I want for my birthday is a lie in and a full shower! Xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Happy birthday for tomorrow RL! and enjoy today's hot stone massage - wow, sounds great!
Coco xxx


----------



## kizzi79

Happy belated birthday Wizard - hope you had a wonderful day   

& happy birthday for tomorrow RL - how fantastic to be sharing your first birthday with Baby G   

Love Krissi  xx


----------



## Stretch

Thought you might like to post here tomorrow 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=246470.new#new


----------



## indekiwi

Roo67, hope you've been having a splendid day! Love and luck to you in the year ahead....

A-Mx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Happy Birthday Roo!! x x x


----------



## lulumead

Have a lovely day Roo.    
xx


----------



## wizard

A bit late I know but....

Roo and RL, hope you had good times on your birthday.   

Thanks to all of you who wished me Happy Birthday... and sent me hugs and thought of me.  I didn't find it easy.  When I first started on this trying to have my own family journey I always said I'd give it until I was 40, because if it hadn't worked by then I'd either be crazy or bankrupt.  I hadn't bargained on being both      My gf took me to see some new born tiger cubs at a wildlife park.  They were beautiful but all I could think was that I should be sharing this with Louis and pushing my 3 month old baby around with me and that my birthday just wasn't right....

Wizard x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Wizard


----------



## Mifi

Wizard lots of huge        

Happy belated B Day Roo        sorry im late    hope you had a lovely day     

Love FM XXXX


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wizard   I totally empathise with you on the age thing, I remember saying that I wouldn't want to be doing this after my 40th, but hey 42nd bday is looming and I am still no further forward! I guess I re evaluate the goals posts.  I do admire a friend of mine who say 3 goes only and then draw a line under it, she had her 3 bfn's and then gave up, she didn't start until she was 44, and despite being able to afford many more cycles, she moved on as that is what she told herself! I also think of the baby I miscarried thinking that s/he should be 3 yr and 2 months old and running around as you do with Louis, which must be so much harder for you.  I hope that your family are not causing you additional stress, and I am so pleased that your gf is there for you

L x

I am so pleased that you have your


----------



## some1

Roo - sorry I missed your birthday.  Hope you had a good one!

Wizard -   

Some1

xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I'm not quite sure where to post as I am not into any neat category now - so if in doubt I revert back to the original thread that started all this off years ago.

Today I have contacted CRGH and have an appt to meet them to discuss options.  I have chatted to CARE in Nottingham and sent them a referral request off as well. My donor's partner and I were chatting and although I am very scared about it all, I am seeing if anyone will let me cycle with my own old eggs, bearing in mind I am 42 next week (how did that happen!!  )  and my last FSH was 2 yrs ago and was 8 then.  I am asking to do CGH then if there are any embryos ok, and any able to be frozen (I have never had anything to freeze before), freeze them and then start the hunt for a surrogate!  There are so many ifs and buts, and emotionally I hope that I can get through it all, I know it is all a bit venturing into unknown territory and I haven't found anyone else who has done this jouney but hey TTC has never been straightforward for me.

I have my appt at CRGH on 15/10!!  

l x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Just wanted to wish you the very best of luck JJ - hope you can work something out with CRGH    
Suitcase
x


----------



## morrigan

Sounds likes youve made some progress - Its a shame you've not found anyone with a similar plan but you have shown such strength of charactor that I am sure you will cope.

Wish you every luck in the world.


----------



## bingbong

JJ so pleased to hear that you are formulating a plan, sounds like a good one to me and I so hope that all works out for you   

bingbong x


----------



## lulumead

Great news JJ - sounds like a very good plan and I am already crossing everything for you      
xxx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Great news JJ, hope everything goes to plan     

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Rose39

Wishing you so much luck with your plans JJ - it really is your turn!

Big hugs to you, your donor and his partner    .

Rose xx


----------



## indekiwi

JJ1, wishing you all the luck in the world that this plan bears fruit.         If you find yourself flagging in spirit as you take each step, reach out hun - you will have so much support from everyone here.     


A-Mx


----------



## Elpida

JJ - so glad you've got a plan of action, I really hope that it works out for you   


E x x x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ honey wishing you all the luck in the world honey x x x  Been thinking along the same lines too

Fab news and all the best for your appt x


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - just wanted to add to all the good wishes and really hope that this is your time - can't believe how strong and resilient you are!   
Good luck hun          
GIA Tooxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks Girls, Well I have an appt at the Lister and one at CRGH on the same day, waiting to hear back from CARE in Notts and then will decide on the experts opinions - I hope that they aren't conflicting!!!

L x


----------



## GIAToo

Hmmm JJ1, on my limited experience of IVF, I would place money that they are conflicting!    But I really hope not and I hope you come out of it with a plan you are happy with      

GIA Tooxxxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

That's the thing I ignore the ones I don't want to hear and go with the ones the I do!!   It's probably how I have ended up on a long and winding journey


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ  I do that with everything .... la la la la la only hear what I want too! x x


----------



## Mifi

JJ1 lots of love and luck hunny        

Love FM XXXX


----------



## cocochanel1

JJ1 just wanted to add my good wishes for your next steps. I so hope this works out for you soon - you will make such a lovely mummy. I particularly want to second what Inde said - do reach out when/if you need some support. You have been there for us every step of the way.     
Hugs, Coco xxx


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, hope you've had a lovely day   . 

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Happy Birthday JJ!!  Hope you've had a fab day x x x


----------



## bingbong

JJ1 I hope that you've had a lovely day and have been nicely spoilt   . I really hope that you have a wonderful year ahead of you    

bingbong x


----------



## indekiwi

JJ1, hope you've had a wonderful day - and that a truly memorable and happy year lies ahead. 

A-M, Poppet & Alvina xxx


----------



## wizard

JJ I hope you've had a lovely birthday and the year ahead is full of much happiness.  You so deserve it     

Wizard x


----------



## sunnygirl1

JJ1 I hope you have had a lovely birthday.  Here's wishing you a year filled with happiness

Sunny xx


----------



## Mifi

JJ1 Hope you had a great birthday and you wishes come true        

    

Love FM XXX


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks for the birthday wishes, I had a lovely day and night.  I had my nails, hair and make-up done, then out for dinner in Covent Garden with my donor and his partner, then we went to the theatre for a show and aterwards for a few drinks and then to a club, so it was a late night, early morning.
I've come to Brighton today, we're going for dinner and to a friend's photographic exhibition this evening- so I'm tired in my old age.
L x


----------



## kylecat

Glad you had a lovely birthday JJ1

Love kylecat xxx


----------



## wishingforanangel

jj it sounds like you had a funny birthday...

what are you going to be doing in brighton? course i'm not sure if we are talking about the same place but i'm just wondering if there is anything to do there other than the amusement park at the pier. too bad that you can't lay out on the beach and read a good book because the sand is really not all that sandy at the beach.


----------



## Lou-Ann

Sounds like you had a lovely birthday JJ   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## acrazywench

Happy belated birthday JJ. Great to hear you've had such a lovely time.

x


----------



## aweeze

JJ1 - so sorry I missed this. Glad you had a good birthday and sending belated wishes from us xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

http://www.northgatearinsoemployerservices.com/essentialnews/4-hr-news/80-time-off-for-ivf-treatment

Interesting

L x


----------



## ambergem

Mmmmm, interesting indeed JJ! Thank you. This would suggest that the annual leave I had to take when I was suffering from OHSS should have actually been sick leave  . 

Very pleased to hear about your new plan by the way, wishing you loads of luck   ... And happy belated birthday!

Linz xx


----------



## Mifi

Thanks JJ1 very interesting!!


----------



## cocochanel1

jj1 very belated birthday wishes for a very special lady xxx


----------



## lulumead

Very happy and belated birthday JJ - sounds like you had a brilliant time. Much deserved.  Wishing that everything you want comes true this year     


xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Lulu how are you?      xxx


----------



## lulumead

Hi Coco,


Doing ok, I think...just want to get going again. Back to clinic on friday to see what they have to say. I want to stick with a few more IUI's as that worked and IVF didn't!


Just finding it hard with my american that is staying...2 more weeks then he's gone. He has been lovely but not great for the emotions/ego having someone be so nice when you want more from them and they don't want you...hey-ho....onwards!!!!


So pleased you are having a girl. How fantastic.
xx


----------



## cocochanel1

Lulu, Men!! He was keen not so long ago? I think they sense vulnerability/interest and as soon as they think you aren't interested then miraculously they are again. 

Try to give yourself your tlc at the moment. It is probably better in the long run not to be involved with him right now anyway? Must be hard having him to stay at the moment though.

IUI sounds good. I'm a big fan. 

Glad you are OK.
Coco xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Coco is you    you always post so early in the morning!!

Hope that all is going well with you


----------



## bingbong

Krissi        I hope that you have a lovely day and a wonderful year ahead.

bingbong x


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Krissi!

Some1
xx


----------



## Mifi

Krissi

Happy birthday hun      hope all your wishes come true        

Love FM XXXXXXXXXX


----------



## acrazywench

Krissi -     - Hope you've had/are having a fantastic day and that you have a fabulous year to look forward to.

xx


----------



## kizzi79

Thank you ladies   

Had a busy day at work but spending the evening with my parents (then off out with my lil sisters on friday night).

Know exactly what I will be wishing for when I blow out my candles ...   


Love Krissi xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Krissi   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

happy Birthday Krissi


----------



## morrigan

happy birthday krissi


----------



## bingbong

Happy Birthday SweetSA!! I hope that you're having a lovely day and have a great year ahead.     

bingbong x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Happy Birthday SweetSA Hope that you'sve had a great day
L x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Sweet SA, hope you're having a lovely day   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## sweet1

Thank you guys I have had a lovely birthday, very chilled out - and last night was out with friends so am a very lucky girl, lets hope this next year brings with it the patter of tiny feet!!! x


----------



## GIAToo

SweetSA - glad you had a lovely birthday and I hope this is your year too       

AND everyone else is still on their journey      
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Kylecat!  Have a lovely day!

Some1

xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy birthday Kylecat, hope you're having a great one!   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Kyle cat I hope that you had a lovely day xx


----------



## GIAToo

Hope you've had a lovely day Kylecat!!      
GIA Tooxxxx


----------



## kylecat

Thankyou so much Ladies for the birthday wishes   

I had a lovely day, especially once home from work and little Kylekitten gave me a lovely card which he'd 'scribbled' his signature in!   

The big 40 next year!!!!   

Love to all and thanks again

Kylecat xxx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Glad to hear that you had a lovely birthday Kylecat, and how special to get a card signed by your little boy   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I ma not quite sure where to post as I don't fall into a neat category and none of the single ladies are doing/exploring surrogacy! so I'll post here!  
I had my bloods redone via my GP where I usually get them, as I was amazed that the Lister told me the FSH had gone to 17, LH 6.9, oetrodial 76 but it had been 2 yrs and I'm 42 now, but in fact this month at the lab I usually get them done it is FSH 8.8, LH 4.7 and oestrodial 134 this month.  I'm a bit flumaxed going to Create on Thurs.

L x


----------



## ambergem

Hi JJ-  I just wanted to wish you all the best with the surrogacy route. I really hope this finally brings you your long awaited baby. Good luck for your appointment on Thursday     

Linz x


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, good luck for your appt on Thursday       

Lou-Ann s


----------



## bingbong

JJ how funny that there is such a difference between the results. I really hope that Thursday's appt goes well and gives you a way forward. Maybe you should start a new JJ thread, there might not be anyone doing the same but we're all here ready to support you   

bingbong x


----------



## Damelottie

have everything crossed for you JJ1 xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ - hope things go well on thurs at your appt, you really deserve a break   
good luck    
Suitcase
x


----------



## greatgazza

JJ really hope the appointment with Create gives you some clarity and guidance as to which route to take and things start to look positive for a way forward for you.  

GG x


----------



## Bambiboo

Hi JJ

Just to say that I hope your appointment goes well this week and Create give you some good news about a way forward.

x


----------



## morrigan

Good luck JJ- I hope the path ahead is clearer after the appointment.


----------



## Roo67

Will be thinking of you tomorrow JJ1 - I hope that you get some answers and that you can find a way forward for you and your boys.

R xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks girls, my donor's partner is coming with me tomorrow so I'll let you know how it goes.

L x


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - good luck for tomorrow - hope it goes well        
GIA Too xxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Jj honey thinking of you and wishing you all the luck in the world x x x


----------



## Elpida

I hope today went well JJ

E x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks so much girls, well I had a good appt at Create.
I have decided to go to Create and do natural/mild IVF to harvest my eggs and they are happy to apply for ethical approval for us to have surrogacy.  I have a fluctuating FSH, 17 last month, 8.8 this month - they explained that this is due to my age and not a lab issue (as I had hoped!!) the Lister also suggested natural IVF so as not to damage the eggs at all with drugs but they weren't licensed for surrogacy, so Dr Jaya suggested going back to ARGC but they said that they wouldn't do mild IVF and with an FSH of 17 no-no.  I went to CRGH as well and they considered natural IVF as well but they were more interested in pursuing the option of redoing the lining surgery, DE first - which I can do when I am older and my own old eggs have gone! as I don't think that trying it a 4th time would make difference in my head.

My appt last 2 1/2 hrs and the male Dr was very thorough and helpful.  Then Dr Geeta came in. I was scanned as well.
I have antral follicles etc (so he gave me a leaflet about IVM as well - taking the immature eggs and growing them in the lab before fertilisation), my right ovary is stuck to the uterus - Dr said maybe due to scarring and repeated EC's (to my knowldge I haven't had difficult EC's and they have alwasys got to both ovaries), but at present there would be a risk of puncturing the bowel of the right might not be an option.  

They need to meet the surrogate - my donor's partners sister, although she can have all her monitoring in Ireland.  I have a low chance of this working abour 10% but that is good enough for me! and higher than my own IVF chances ever.

They did suggest going for EC on Wed but the boys are off on AL to USA and everything would have to be like clockwork to get to clinic deposit and check in on time, if I needed a day extra to cook them I'd be stuffed as they don't want to use frozen sperm. The clinic don't cycle people over Xmas, so it looks like Jan (give me a chance to sort diet out / work arramgements etc!!)

L x


----------



## Damelottie

WOW!! Fabulous news there JJ1 - GOOD LUCK


----------



## bingbong

JJ that sounds great! I'm so pleased that they took the time and explained everything and are all set to go for Jan!!! 

bingbong x


----------



## some1

Sounds really positive JJ1 - keeping my fingers crossed for you that this is the beginning of your dream coming true.   

Some1

xx


----------



## morrigan

Sounds like a great plan - jan will be here before you know it.


----------



## Roo67

JJ1 - that is great news and that you are good to go again soon,  Jan will be here before you know it. Did they say how long ethical approval would take?

R x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ that's brilliant   
So glad you had a good appt and it sounds like they were very thorough and informative. Wishing all of you the very very best of luck, it's such a wonderful thing your donor's partner's sister is doing and I hope it all works out for you   
Keep us posted!
Suitcase
x


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, so glad that your appt went well yesterday   . Wishing you all the luck in the world, Jan will be here before you know it   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Jj - I really wish you all the luck in the world honey x x x


----------



## sweet1

me too, you have been through such a lot JJ, so all the very best of luck from me too xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy Birthday Morrigan, hope you are having a good one   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## GIAToo

Happy Birthday Moriigan - hope you have/had a lovely day   

JJ1 - how are things? Any news?     
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## greatgazza

Happy birthday Morrigan hope you're having a great time. 

How do you girls know when it's peoples' brithdays is there a way of getting notifications or something?

Giat have you had any news/found out what you're going to do?

GG x


----------



## GIAToo

Hey GG, haven't had any response from Stepan so this month looks like it's definitely out and I'll have to wait until February   
Ho-hum - gives me more time to look for a job I guess.  Feel very disappointed, but trying to look at the positives   

How you doing?
GIA tooxxx


----------



## greatgazza

What a mare, so sorry to hear that   .  Was it you lining that made him call it off?

I was feeling a bit better yesterday, my mood seemed to lift, but it was shortlived and i'm really low again today.  God, i hate feeling like this.

You wouldn't consider looking into GO then?

GG xx


----------



## GIAToo

I'm sorry you're feeling low again today.  But to have one good day is a step in the right direction    

I think generally a natural FET has a lower success rate (I've been googling it   ) and he has literally just replied to me to say that I can't carry on as my "success rate will be much lower".  I think Stepan has been really good with me and I am happy with the embryos he is offering, so I wouldn't be comfortable going to GO and they are probably shut over Christmas too so it wouldn't make any diffference.  It gives me time to eat well etc and get mentally fitter IYKWIM.   
GIA Tooxxxx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi

What is GO? Is that Gycentrum?

F x


----------



## greatgazza

Hi fraggles

yes GO is gycentrum.  I was saying to Giat last night that if she was desperate to try and have a tx sooner/before xmas it might be worth looking into GO as i don't think they have a wait for DFET and are also highly regarded from what i read when i was considering them.

What is involved with a medicated DFET then?  I didn't actually realise what i was doing would be considered a natural DFET, or is it not?  I'm on progynova and progesterone.

GG x


----------



## GIAToo

GG - you're on a medicated one 'cos you're taking hormone replacement medication (progynova etc) to ensure your "baby room" womb is in tip top shape for the baby/embryo   

So basically 'cos you have to start taking it on day 1 of your cycle it's too late for me.  And day 1 of my next cycle means that day 19 would land on 6th Jan when the clinic is shut!   

xx


----------



## Fraggles

Giatoo

It is frustrating cos I miss a cycle too when the clinic is closed grrrr

F x


----------



## greatgazza

Any way you could delay your cycle a bit with progesterone or something?  Probably too much hassle in case it doesn't work right.

Geez so much for these abroad clinics being open all year round!!  I think the copenhagen fertility center i went to told me they were open 365/year but then when i tried to go in on the sunday they weren't really having it    

I just got an email from Stepan so maybe in he's in 'answering mode' right now and might get back to you

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

Yeah, he answered me and confirmed what I thought, which was that the "conditions" (as he put it   ) were not good this month and it would lower my chances of success.  With Grade 1 blasts it's best to get everything in good shape eh? (including my ass !!   - not much hope of that with Christmas between now and then!!! )

xx


----------



## GIAToo

Does anyone know how you can delay your AF by a week
xx


----------



## greatgazza

Glad he got back to you, at least you know he's doing his best for your chances of success and it's good to know he doesn't have people over there doing tx's they shouldn't just for the dosh or anything.

I just emailed him back saying thanks for the info (i was asking how many he recommended putting back and the incidence of twins or risks) and said i'd see him on thursday if i managed not bug him again and he came back and said have a nice flight.  how sweet! i hated emailing him so much and felt like such a pest but he seems sooooo patient.  I think i've got a crush on him   haha!! is there a syndrome where women fall in love with their gynae/baby doctors!!

i think i have read about nordistherone (no idea how to spell it) which is think is a bcp but i read that might be the only one that can delay af

GG x


----------



## GIAToo

Hey GG...back off, I've got a crush on him too!!      You're right he is VERY patient.  I feel sorry for him having to answer emails on a Saturday night, he must love his job!  I think I get crushes on anyone who is kind to me these days! 
I was asking about delaying AF 'cos when I wrote back to him I said I would have to wait until February and he wrote back "or January" but day 19 lands on 6th Jan and the clinic is shut until the 10th   

What did he say about the incidence of twins etc btw??

xx


----------



## lulumead

Hello..I think some people have taked BCP to get their cycles to work at right times...might be worth asking him about that...you might just be able to delay a couple of weeks to push you further into January.
x


----------



## lulumead

...and happy birthday Morrigan. Hope you have a lovely time...


xxx


PS (i too have no idea how anyone knows when people's birthdays are - I'm always very impressed!)


----------



## greatgazza

Ha ha I so know what you mean about having crushes on anyone that's kind!  After years of being treated like cr*p by w**nkey men it's hard not to fall in love with someone if they just remember to ask if you take sugar in your tea!!

I'd have a look on here about nordistholone as i have read people saying it can delay AF and if no joy maybe ask stepan if he thinks it's possible to delay af and what you could take.  The bcp must be used to time things as so many women take it and then stop it for af to come 3 or 4 days later to start down regging etc...

These were the questions i asked and his answers as they might be useful for you too:

1)  What is the incidence of twins with putting 2 embryos back at Reprofit or in general with this treatment?  With frozen around 10%

2) Is implantation and a positive result much more likely with having 2 embryos put back?  YES

3) At 42 is the risk of miscarriage or problems higher with twins?  No, not age releated

4)  Would you consider having 3 put back quite risky?  Quite risky , I suggest to put 2 back

I took off the kisses he sent   

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

greatgazza said:


> I took off the kisses he sent


You're just showing off now !!!  

I don't want to take the pill as that actually won't make any difference 'cos it's too late I think  I can't work out a way it would help!

Interesting about the twins stuff. OOOH I'm very excited for you   
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## GIAToo

Oh Hi Lulumead!


----------



## greatgazza

I don't really understand the pill thing.  But let's try and work it back, if the earliest you could have tx is 10th jan you want 10th jan to be your day 19-21 so working back from that you want day 1 to be around 22nd dec to start taking the progynova.  So if you have a 28 day cycle (you're on day 9 now?) your next cycle day 1 would be 16th dec so you would want to delay af by just under a week.  so if you took the bcp on say monday if you can get and stopped taking it on say 20th dec and af came 3/4 days after you would be on track to get in there for tx as soon as the clinic opens again.  My calculations could be out but as a quick rough guide, does that sound like the right kinda dates?

If the bcp can delay it like that wouldn't it be worth looking into it?

Yes i am a bit excited, well i was yesterday but my low mood has taken over that, hopefully i will get excited again, although terrified.

GG xx

Oh stepan's just emailed me again, i do wish he'd just leave it now, i'm so over it


----------



## GIAToo

Your dates are spot on GG, but I can't start taking the pill in the middle of a cycle can I?   

You can have him, I'm watching Johnny Depp for now    

I'll be excited for you   

GIa Tooxxx


----------



## lulumead

Hello   


I would have thought you could take BCP on day 1 of next cycle...i.e 16 Dec and stay on it until you want period to start for next cycle, so maybe you stay on it for 2/3 weeks...come off it...AF arrives and bob's your uncle!


I know that BCP is used for cysts and I was told that if I went on it, it could just be for a couple of weeks if needed. Someone is bound to have done this...maybe they can explain how it worked for them.


Could you just email him and ask if you can take BCP from day 1 of next cycle for two weeks to delay January cycle?


I think I'll have to miss a cycle too with clinic christmas closures...oh well...


xx


----------



## some1

Happy Birthday Morrigan!  Hope you have had a great day!

Some1

xx


----------



## greatgazza

Aww thanks for your excitement  

I really don't know about when the pill can be started but worth a look on here and a google?

Never really got the johnny depp thing. I'd prefer Dermot O'leary, but prob too old for him   God how crap have our lives got that we fantasize about celebs or doctors we've only emailed!! (well i met him for about 45 secs for my IUI so maybe there's some reality in my crush.  that's my story and i'm sticking to it  )

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

lulumead - if I star the pill on day one of next cycle it will only bring my ET forward by about a week (to end of Jan) so it's really not worth it.  Thanks though   

Hi Some1   

xxx


----------



## GIAToo

GG - for me, my fantasies are always much better than the reality so who cares!!
xx


----------



## greatgazza

Yep, you've got a good point there!!

The right spelling is norethisterone. I just googled it and found this on one site:

"Delaying your period
Hi - just browsing and saw your question. I use Norethisterone regulary! It is a man made progesterone drug which suppresses your period until you want it! Take 1 tab 3 times a day, 3/4 days before your period is due and can be taken for up to 2 weeks. When you stop taking the tablets your period will arrive in 3/4 days! I have used it so many time for holidays, hospital visits, weekends away etc. The only slight side effect I have is bloating - but better that than a period!! If you know well in advance when you need to alter your cycle you can actually take it for shorter times are start planning a few months ahead of yourself! Hope this helps. Good luck. ps - Doc's prescription only!"

So from what this woman is saying it seems like you can start it just before your af is due, so worth looking into it a bit more and/or asking Stepan.

GG x


----------



## GIAToo

Thanks GG - I will indeed ask him, hopefully he'll stop emailing you enough to reply to me    
xxx


----------



## some1

Hi GIAToo!  Feel like I have lost touch with you (and quite a few others) since the threads were split.  How are things going for you?

Some1

xx


----------



## GIAToo

Some1 (at the risk of boring the others   )  on Thursday I cancelled my final attempt at OE IVF (I was doing a mild IVF via Reprofit) as the scan showed thin lining and one tiny follie.   I had asked Stepan for Donor embryos as a back up and he offered me three Grade 1 blasts but said I shouldn't carry on with this cycle as I hadn't been taking the right medication.  Which means I now will have DFET early February (wanted it early Jan, but the clinic is shut until 10th Jan, hence all the talk of delaying AF for a week!)

How are you??
xxx


----------



## greatgazza

Don't worry giat i already told him that i didn't want him to neglect anyone else as i felt that would be wrong so i'll have another word with him and make sure he gets back to you sharpish.

Crazy talk  but has brought a smile to my face tonight  

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

GG - made me smile too


----------



## some1

GIAToo - so sorry to hear that you had to cancel your cycle, that must have been very frustrating and disappointing   Wishing you so much luck for your DFET cycle next year      that 2011 is the year for you!

GG - good luck for your upcoming cycle too!     

Some1

xx


----------



## greatgazza

thanks some1, how are you doing?

Giat normally in life (real life rather than virtual) i would carry on something like that, I love p**s take and being silly like that but i thought i better not get carried away on here.....don't want to get anyone into trouble and don't want anyone telling Stepan's wife about us....oops!!   

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

Some1 - I was really disappointed, but hey, at least I didn't spend £5000 for a BFN this time.  And with Grade 1 blasts, as Rose39 has said, I will increase my chances dramatically.  I have given myself until the end of next year to get pregnant and then I will move on.  So here's hoping it happens in 2011.  

How are you and LO?

GG - I'm the same, but I think people CAN think you're being serious at times can't they, so maybe we better "cool it"    How you feeling this morning?

Hi lulumead and anyone else out there - sorry we hijacked the thread last night with our banter   

AFM - Stepan just emailed me and said "in that case we should postpone until February".  No mention of delaying AF   , but anyway I want to mess around with my body as little as possible between now and DFET.  Might get drunk on Christmas day though!  I have just signed up for 3 shifts for [email protected] as a dog handler!  Very excited about that   

GIA Tooxxx


----------



## morrigan

Hi everyone - there might be a few of us out there at beg of feb! It's so annoying when you want to get going ! I agree about not messing body around will give you a better chance.

Thankyou for all the birthday wishes - if I'm honest I had a pants birthday- I was at work and didn't tell anyone so Noone wished me happy birthday- none of the friends who I asked to come out sat night with me could make it and the one who was coming round to join me in a night in with takeaway cancelled 1/2 hour before because her children were ill so I spent the night on my own feeling sorry for myself - mind you getting another year older without being pregnant is never going to fun in fertility circles! Sorry for the moan !


----------



## GIAToo

morrigan - sorry you didn't have a great birthday       You should have come online and joined in with greatgazza and I fantasising about actors and doctors!!   
GIA Tooxxxxx


----------



## Fraggles

mmm well I totally agree with you too about hunky dr's.

: -)


----------



## greatgazza

sorry your birthday was rubbish morrigan, mine was this year as well, it sucks.

giat, i'm hanging in there, mood not lifting but just trying to let it be whatever it's going to be and hope it will eventually pass.  Feeling nervous about this week and can't quite believe what i'm doing to be honest, feels a bit surreal.

So Fraggles, have you got a crush on Stepan too??  

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

mmm well put it this way I make sure my lady bush is nicely trimmed rather than a overgrown garden.

Being gross if there was ever a scandal about where donor sperm was coming from at least I know whilst our children might be related they would all be rather good looking ;-)


----------



## greatgazza

Ha ha!!  Hmmm yes a trim sounds like a good idea.....

there was some story about some sleazy doctor doing that wasn't there!?!  Hundreds of mini stepan's all over the UK!

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

LOL  xx


----------



## Fraggles

Apologies if this is the wrong place to ask but has anyone on here had any good experiences with dating websites and able to recommend ones they have had good experiences with please?


F x


----------



## greatgazza

Oh blimey i've tried 'em all!!  Been on dating direct, match, plenty of fish, girls date for free, am trying to remember which ones i got the most dates off, never ended up chatting to anyone on match but i've heard of people who've had luck on there, think i met a few off dating direct.  As you can probably gather none of them ever had the desired happy ever after    If i had the energy or motivation to give it a go now i might try guardian soulmates or timesonline encounters i think it's called to try and find someone with a couple of braincells.

You thinking of getting back out there then are you?

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi GG

Yep I think it is about time that I did. I need more fun and to get out more. I want to re-energise my life as I am boorrrrredd.

F x


----------



## greatgazza

Yep i certainly know that feeling.  I really need to get out more and build up more of a social life as most of my friends can't go out as often as me due to having kids and/or partners etc.  I'm feeling too low at the moment to cope with dating tho and i'm not sure i could handle it alongside  tx.

Are you going to do it alongside tx or take a break from tx?

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi

No do it alongside but based on previous experience there won't be that much meeting and greeting from the websites lol. I want to try new things, meet new friends, etc etc. Things are a little stale and lots of friends are in couple or with kids.

F x


----------



## morrigan

I'm not sure I could fantasise about doctors that spend most of there evenings emailing foreign woman LOL!! all sounds amusing- maybe we should all arrange a chat room meet?? for us not the doctors and celebreties.

Fraggles- I can't offer you any advise on dating websites - didn't work for me- I did match and some how by the time I got to the 6 month free bit i'd lost interest- didn't go on on one date!!- I make this comment in jest !!!-Maybe you should post away from the singles board for that question as clearly none of us seem to be experts- LOL!!! I'm still on the idea of starting the sperm not required dating site !!! there is a dating thread isnt there? I found the joke email ive seen about dating sites- I'm the girl that woudl recieve the email saying we've had you profile on our site for 3 years and noones shown any interest- would you like us to try it without the photo for a week !LOL


----------



## suitcase of dreams

morrigan -    sorry to hear you had a pants b'day. Hope by next birthday things look very different for you   

fraggles - there is a thread on the singles board for single women and (internet) dating - it may have slipped down a bit if no one is posting but it's def there so have a look and maybe re-ignite the discussion there   

for what it's worth my sister met her current boyfriend through match.com, they've been together for nearly 9 months now and she's off to South Africa to meet his parents and spend Xmas with them - so it seems the internet can work for some. Mindyou, it did take about 3 yrs of dates and short lived relationships for her to get to this point so it's not an overnight success by any means!

Suitcase
x


----------



## caramac

Just wanted to say that there is no way I'd want to date a doctor who deals with ladies bits every day...imagine how it would be when it's time to get jiggy...a bit of a bus man's holiday for him I'd imagine!

Good luck to all those planning/having tx right now!


----------



## suitcase of dreams

I'm inclined to agree with Caramac...and besides although he's very nice I have to say I don't have the Stepan adoration gene


----------



## greatgazza

Yes, good point caramac!! I have to say i only saw him for about 45 seconds so tbh don't actually know if i thought he was attractive or not at all.  Bit like myself and Giat were saying last night, think i'm just so flippin' grateful for someone being nice to me that i start to get carried away!! I think the fact that he's not actually getting p**sed off with me and so many emails and telling me to get lost is such a relief that i'm ridiculously grateful.

GG x


----------



## Fraggles

I am ridiculously grateful to anyone who helps me have a child on this journey and shows a warm and empathetic manner, especially, after I have heard some of the experiences others have had from so called IVF specialists on this journey. 

F x


----------



## greatgazza

Yes i know.  I can't believe some of these people have chosen a vocation which more than anything really requires the ability to be understanding, sympathetic and gentle and yet you get bull dozing, blunt, rude uncaring t**ts who make lord sugar look like a pussycat.  They really should teach more 'bedside manner' at med school.  i bet being treated nicely and with compassion increases recovery rates etc.

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi GG

Have you had any more thoughts about what you are going to do? Or have I missed something.

F x


----------



## greatgazza

Tx wise?

I'm going to reprofit on weds for DFET on thursday.......thought you knew that tho cos you wished me luck on the reprofit thread!!  

Or are you asking a question about something else i'm having emma's dilemma about?

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi GG

I thought that and then thought I had got confused as I looked at your profile which suggested you were in turmoil so really thought
I was losing it.

F x


----------



## greatgazza

that's just reminded me i need to change that. don't worry you're not losing it

GGx


----------



## GIAToo

Hey girls, just catching up on your chat - I've actually been out in the real world!    with real people   

Anyway, just wanted to tell you that medical students DO actually get training in how to "deal" with people these days, I do acting work in their training sessions.  It is hilarious!  I started crying during the role play (I was a patient with depression   ) and the sheer horror on their faces was priceless - they physically moved back from me and one actually said "so, about this pain in your back...."!!!    The teacher loved me 'cos she knew they would be horrified and we had a little giggle about it   

GIa Tooxxx


----------



## ElsieF

GIa - that is so funny! I bet you have lots of fun winding them up     Good luck in Feb!


Fraggles - I met my DH through match.com. Afer the inevitable various false starts.. I 'winked' at  him because his friend had given him a 'recommendation' that said he was great marriage material     I thought that anyone who was laid back enough to let their friend say that on a dating website, was good enough to meet. 3 months later he proposed in the Arabian desert, and 3 months after that we were married. We have been married for 2 years now. He is gorgeous, intelligent, steady, supportive and solid as a rock. and I love him very much. Sometime I have to pinch myself because I can't believe just how easy and loving our relationship is. It is such a shame that we didn't meet until we were in our 40's (we discovered we were at the same event of about 100 people in Italy when I was 28 and he 33 yrs old!) but now that we have, we are so happy.    I know dating is really hard work, but it is So Worth It if you meet the right person.

Go for It!

Elcf


----------



## greatgazza

wow elcfoxy that's some whirlwind romance.  A proposal after 3 months, amazing!! I would pinch myself too, how lovely.  

giat, er....the real world.......?

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Romance isn't dead after all!


----------



## GIAToo

GG - real world, year..er.. crazy innit!?!    Went to see a play with lots of friends in and schmoozed with the writer/director as he's making a feature film of a play I was in.  Have decided to get back into my acting etc.

elcfoxy - hello you! How ARE you   

GIa Tooxxx


----------



## ElsieF

Hi GIA, - Yes I have been hiding for a while. I am taking the day off work today, and in the huff after our 4th failed cycle      We have a couple of frosties from last year, but I am not holding our much hope for them as it is clearly my age that is the problem.  The doc advised us to give up last time, but we insisted on one last try with OE. I have been researching the DE route, and am feeling that that is going to be our best chance. In fact, like you, accepting it is somewhat of a relief! Dh is more upset than me at the moment but he is coming round to the idea of DE. It seems to be harder for him. I suppose I know that any baby that grows inside me will be mine. (Which, if you think about it makes DE easier to accept than DS) but he said he is just is a bit sad that it took him this long to find me, and it is me and everything about me that he wants for his children. It is a great shame that he was just a few years too late, but I am truly thankful that today's technology and the wonderful generosity of donors means that we can still have a loving family.  
We are also moving to Scotland at the end of the month.  A big change of lifestyle for us - nearer my family and no more commuting!! This means DH will save 3- 4 hours a day! So I am looking forward to being able to do 'stuff' in the evenings. (exactly what I am not sure yet!)  
I am so glad you are thinking of getting back into acting again. You do love it (brave girl!) I am very glad you (and the dog) are feeling better.  
Fraggles - I forgot to say that I was also doing tx when I met dh on match. I wasn't in a cycle at the time, but told him within the first couple of weeks that I had tried on my own a few months before. I was quite matter of fact about it, and it got us talking about wanting children. In fact we joked about trying together after about a month, then decided to wait another month to get to know each other    I guess that was really what made the proposal so quick. And saying yes was the easiest decision I have ever made!  
Suitcase - it's been lovely to catch up with your story. Twin boys! Wow! Good luck  A life of picking up endless socks awaits   

elcf


----------



## Diesy

Hiya,

I know everyone is going have replied about three times before I get a reply out  

But hey!

elcf - you may be my hero!  I'm interested in a guy and wonder how I would tell him, if we actually get it together(!), about all this stuff I have been doing - not quite but nearly on Tx.  I think your story goes to show what can happen when people know themselves and are ready to move forward 

Morrigan - rubbish birthday, that's no use!  I hope you treated yourself to something nice!  I bet your doggie loved it and all your loving attention.  

Erm, what else, oh yeah I asked someone out for the second time on Friday - very nice "I'm very busy but would like to reply"  Does that mean he'd like to?

Fraggles - I'm on plenty of fish - bless me    I have a reasonably hot 34 year old pursuing me but worried my pics are too nice and he'll be disappointed.  

I won't repeat what I did yesterday with regards to my ex but very fragile today 

BUT - If you've all got this far!  I have really good vibes for everyone who's going for Tx now and in Feb!    I really think some special stuff is going to happen for all you happy and persistent gals.  Good news is on the way!  (I am closer to the Northern Lights than most of you.  What this has to do with anything I know not, but it sounded good...I thought.)

elcf - welcome to Scotland in a few months 

ttfn
Diesy  xx


----------



## ElsieF

Hi Diesy,
My advice would be that when you do tell him, just say it matter of factly. Don't try and explain or be defensive about it (which, I don't know about you girls, but I used to kind of fall into that) and DONT go into detail    (that's what FF is for!) All he needs to know is that you are serious about having kids. For the right person, that's the attractive bit    .  I do remember I hid my letters from the ivf clinic in the attic when he first started coming round to my place.    I didn't want him to come across any before I had the chance to mention it!

elcf


----------



## Diesy

Hi elcf,

If I get that far I will bear that in mind   Glad it worked out for you, it's a lovely story   I'll need to delete my browsing history too   Every time I open it up there's FF & ESB!  Early days though, I can't even get him to out with me yet 

Thanks,
Diesy


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Just thought I'd update you I had a uterus and ovary assessment with Prof Staurt Campbell yesterday, very thorough dopplers, different cuts etc and the verdict I have an odd shaped uterus (I always knew that!!) it has 2 big horns but its not bicornuate as the top isn't flat and it's not a septum either he thinks it's congential and was surprised after half a dozen hysteroscopies and so much scanning that not really identified it was full of adhesions again and had bits of endometrium in islands not connected, but it was 5.1mm thick and feather like in shape with a triple layer (cd25) he said if I implanted in the wrong place in one of the horms it would be like an ectopic but called something else, and would rupture but if implanted lower down then might work but as we know we can't say where they implant and also my chances of implantation are ovbiously lower etc.  I had good blood flow to one ovary less to the other, and smallish ovaries but I'm an old bird, and I'd ovulated !!

We've got next appt on 23 Dec
L x


----------



## lulumead

Hi JJ


Sounds very thorough. I know everyone raves about the Prof...bit of a scanning pioneer.  Good to know about ovulation, bodes well for natural IVF and getting some eggs for surrogacy.


Did you go to Harley street?


I was at Raynes Park today. If we ever coincide with appointments it would be nice to say hello face to face   


How you feeling about it all?
xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Jj - that's really interesting and thorough.  It's a shame it wasn't picked up before. Fab news about blood flow to ovaries and ovulation!

Take care x


----------



## morrigan

Sounds like some good news in there- How do you feel? Have they recomended more surgery?


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Lulu I was at Harley St  as it is easier for me, so I go there. Ironically as I was on the scanning table my mobile went and when I picked up the voicemail it was the clinic in Ireland I've contacted re looking after the surrogate! our Drs are obviously synched!!! would be nice to meet for a coffee sometime!

Morrigan no more surgery for me atm surrogacy is my current option as I look at it I can re-explore surgery and using DE in the years ahead but I won't have that window of opportunity with my own eggs later in life, even months later, and a surrogate currently willing to help.

Also my previous acupuncturist (that many of the FF ladies use) called me this afternoon and we chatted about surrogacy etc

L x


----------



## lulumead

I'd take that as a good omen JJ   


Feels like its all coming together. Are you going to be starting egg collections in January?  Will they do IVM with you too?
xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Lulu we have to go to an ethics committee first for surrogacy and the surrogate needs to go through stuff before she can be approved too , but I might go ahead with natural IVF and bank the egg(s), we briefly mentioned IVM sounds a good option if you can get another egg out of it!! Are you considering IVM?


----------



## lulumead

Been thinking about it...but I've lost faith in it all really.  IUI worked for me so am sticking to that at the moment as so much cheaper...I'm just not sure IVF is good for me...done 3 goes with no success. I just need to get a more positive attitude about it all again.


I think I will do IVM if I do more IVF's at create, although I'm tempted to just switch to reprofit and use donor embryo's...really not convinced anymore that good AMH, hormone levels, etc mean anything...seems to all be down to luck!


But agree IVM is good option, just adds a fair bit to the price... I like the science behind it    It makes a lot of sense and the less drug approach is something I do think is good.


Sounds like a good plan to start collecting the eggs whilst you sort the other stuff so when you get the go head you have the embies ready.


xx


----------



## greatgazza

JJ sounds like it's moving in the right direction for you which is fab, really hope it speeds along.  All sounds very complicated too and i have to say i really admire your determination to go through all this in order to continue with your own eggs.  Donor eggs isn't an 'easy' option but could be seen as a lot more straightforward and speedy than surrogacy so i really wish you all the luck in the world with it.

GGx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GG wishing you luck on your 2ww.  For me going down a DE route wasn't a dfficult decision really, and I went down that route 2 years ago with no joy, only to turn back to the old eggs! mainly because I can't physically carry a child then I should be genetically related to it if at all possible (and for surrogacy in the UK at least one IP's have to be genetically connected to the child, as in the UK  it is illegal to conceive a child for the purpose of adoption).

L x


----------



## greatgazza

JJ Of course, sorry you have tried donor eggs, i forget sometimes to remind myself of all the history/signature.  then of course i can see why you would want to go down the route that you are.  I hope you don't mind me asking but what are the reasons you can't physically carry a child, i realise the issues from your previous post, and your lining issues, is it the shape etc of your uterus that's the big issue?  Is it not good news from your appt with this professor that there are options?  Is there nothing he can do so you can carry it yourself?  It's all a bit way over my head tbh.

And what's an IP?  I'm thinking maybe intentional parent or something and not internet provider??!!  

GGx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GG I have Asherman's syndrome from my mc and then ERPC so they have scrapped too much away and damage the basal layers so they don't thicken and my uterus has lots of adhesions, it happens in about 2-3 % of ERPC's and is never discussed when they do such routine operations! 
http://www.ashermans.org/





L x

/links


----------



## Rose39

Quick update from me - have been glued to my laptop and phone since 8am.... all 6 vitrified eggs that were ICSI'd have fertilised, so it's day 3 transfer on Friday morning. Am so relieved.... just praying that my embies are strong little fighters and develop well!

I am so tempted to ask to have 3 put back - normally they put 2 blasts back, but as these are day 3 embies and after so many goes, if it's a higher chance of twins or a higher chance of nothing then I'd much rather have twins! Of course that depends on whether I'm lucky enough to have some good embies to put back in the first place! 

I am now going to have 2 days of proper holiday relaxing in the sun and knitting until Friday! Thank you for all your support over the past few days - I would have gone mad here on my own!

Rose xx (who is starting to feel a bit excited now).


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Fabulous news Rose, so pleased that it's all coming together now after the ups and downs of the past few days
Sit back, relax and enjoy the sunshine whilst you can and all the best for Friday 

I would take their advice on how many to put back when you see what quality they are - as you may know, I was fully intending to have 3 put back this last time round and the only reason I didn't was a comms mix up between me and the clinic and then it was too late to thaw the 3rd one....I am over the moon to be blessed with twins because I truly never thought it would happen (I was intending to have 3 put back to maximise the chances of 1 sticking around) BUT it has been and continues to be scary in terms of the additional complications/risks of multiple pregnancies and I would have been utterly terrified by triplets
Hopefully the clinic can give you some good advice on Friday re likely outcomes

Will be thinking of you and sending lots of positive vibes     
Suitcase
x


----------



## smilingandwishing

Rose - wonderful news so far - good luck!!

Smiling xx


----------



## Rose39

Thanks S&W and Suity - whoops wrong thread... got so excited I should have posted in the abroadies thread not this one... will copy and paste my post across! Dimwit!    

Rose xx


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey all,

Been quiet these past few days.  Still waiting on my KD/co-parent and not sure if he is going to get back to me till after Christmas on if he want's to go ahead.  This time of the year he is flat out with performances etc.    I've recieved so many books this week and currently pouring through them:  "Choosing Motherhood", "Helping the Stork", "Knock yourself Up", "Single by Chance Mothers by Choice".  Does anyone else have any recommendations?  I figure I gotta have something to read whilst I'm going through this waiting stuff  

Good luck to all the ladies in waiting, thinking and cycling.  May your Christmas wishes come true!

Dawn


----------



## Diesy

Hiya Dawn,

When did life become all about waiting, eh?  Grr...  Oh well.  Hope you get some news soon, sometimes when people are busy it's easy to make the decision, but it's a biggy!  Maybe I should buy a book!  I'm kinda waiting till Feb now.  Scotland shuts at New Year so I wouldn't be able to get scans done at the right time.  Plus I'm online, flirting, need my head examined!  

Well, hope the waiting isn't doing your head in too much - Diesy


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - Glasgow CRM are brill for scans .. not sure what its like over Christmas tho..

Take care x x 

Dawn - hope you hear some good news soonx x


----------



## Diesy

Cheers Mini, yeah they are good at GCRM.  I've had all my stuff done there so far and they are really handy too.  It's just Scotland that closes, we get two banks hols a Hogmanay, nothing moves.  Feb might be altogether better anyways.  Get some chill time over the break too.

Hope all's good with you!  Looking forward to the hols?
Diesy xx


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Diesy said:


> Plus I'm online, flirting, need my head examined!
> Well, hope the waiting isn't doing your head in too much - Diesy


I tried online dating and just attract weirdos. It's in my genes I think. I find it's just a distraction from sitting with my feelings anyway. I gotta face those crappy things eventually. 
I'm a bit calmer today and each day just realising I am powerless over his answer and when he gets back to me. Best to concentrate on what I can be doing. Staying healthy, eating right, taking plenty of folic acid and reading up on being a single mom!
Hope you are staying warm and thanks for the well wishes.

Dawn


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Dawn I hope that you are coping, has he given you a date by which he will have made a decision or are you meeting up?  It would drive me nuts!!
L x


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

♥JJ1♥ said:


> Dawn I hope that you are coping, has he given you a date by which he will have made a decision or are you meeting up? It would drive me nuts!!
> L x


He's flat out with Christmas performances till ... Christmas.  I would imagine we will get together during the beginning of Jan. I am away in the USA for 10 days from Boxing day. It's my own making really. I was told he was super busy at this time of the year. Which could be a benefit as less time to think too much about it.  It sort of backfired though as I said stupidly "Take as much time as you need" forgetting I would go  waiting I've made a decision that if I don't hear from him by the 10th of Jan I will arrange to meet up. I've given myself a deadline of 15th Jan. That gives me intimate knowledge of 3 cycles as well. (I'm using a CB fertility monitor like a hawk daily). I did give him more information when I saw him last sunday. I printed out some posts from here and mentioned that other gay men would be willing to chat to him. I've done everything in my power now. Just gotta ,wait and enjoy Christmas. I'm broody as anything though 

Thanks for caring L! I appreciate your support.


----------



## lulumead

Hello all


Just wanted to wish you all a merry christmas, and a very happy 2011 filled with LO's for everyone    
xxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Me too ...

Merry Christmas and all the best for 2011 - Here's to all our dreams coming true x x  x       

 Mini x x x


----------



## some1

Merry Christmas everyone!  Hope everyone has a really happy one and that all your dreams come true in 2011

Some1

xx


----------



## indekiwi

Wishing everyone a Happy Christmas and a Bumptious 2011!

A-Mx


----------



## Diesy

hApPy ChRiStMaS eVeRyBoDy!
Diesy xx​


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wishing you a Merry Christmas

L x


----------



## Teela

MERRY XMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR

LOVE
TEELA
X


----------



## bluprimrose

Hello to all the lovely singlies out there

I haven't posted much recently but I've been keeping up with everyone's news and have found great comfort and support myself just by being here, even though I've been a little quiet, so thank you.

I just wanted to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and I hope that all our dreams come true in 2011 - we deserve it!

With lots of love to everyone and sending hugs to those who need it,

bpxx


----------



## Betty-Boo




----------



## suitcase of dreams

Wishing all the wonderful single women a very Happy Christmas and all the very best for 2011 - may it be the year that all your dreams come true, whatever they may be

And a huge thank you to all of you for your friendship, support and advice over the past year (and beyond) - I don't know how I would have got through the difficult times without it 

Ok, enough from the over emotional me, HAPPY CHRISTMAS everyone!!

Suitcase
x


----------



## cocochanel1

Happy Christmas to all of you. May all your dreams be fulfilled in 2011.
Coco
xxx


----------



## bingbong

happy christmas to everyone, I really hope that everyone's dreams come true. Thank you all for being there and for being such a fabulous source of information and support. 

Bingbong x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Merry Christmas to everyone, hope you are all having a great day!

Lou-Ann x


----------



## morrigan

Merry Christmas to one and all - I thought I'd share a really amusing conversation with my grandmother ( who doesnt know about my tx) today! A nativity show came on tv and she said - this business about Mary bring a virgin can't be true, everyone knows you can't get pregnant without a man - she must of been seeing someone behind joseph's back - my mum tried to explain that that was the whole point of the story that it was the son of god and a miracle - she begs to differ and  insists mary's a tart - when my mum tried to say that's what christains believe she turned to me and said well if you turn up pregnant and tell me it's the son of god I'll disown you !!!!! Cue members of the family who do know about my tx desperately trying to change subject with out looking at each other !!! I can only hope son of sperm donor is more acceptable than the second coming of Christ !!! -  so glad I havnt yet told her about tx !!!! Good job nobody in our family is deeply religious other wise she might of really caused offence ! As it was we all had a giggle !


----------



## GIAToo

I hope everyone had a lovely day today.
Thanks for all the advice and support you've given me over the past year.

May all our dreams come true in 2011

Lots of love
GIA Tooxxx

p.s. been crying at lot at One Born at Christmas    - hope that's me soon and all the others still on their journey..


----------



## Diesy

How funny Morrigan! I think there some global consciousness thing going on there!  It reminds me of a conversation I had with I guy I like recently.  First off he asked me if I was pregnant (because I'd fainted).  I said if I was I'd have trouble explaining it, apart from the fact that my middle name is Mary!  He then jumps in and says his middle name is Joseph!  Honestly, it would have been almost perfect if he didn't have a girlfriend.

Phew, Xmas over!  Not the best.  Did go out and take some pictures of our beautiful country   Hope everyone else had a good one...and Carry on Screaming is making up for it all now 

Seconded Gia Too!

Diesy xx


----------



## greatgazza

Oh Diesy i'm sorry you've had a bit of a rubbish one  .  Mine hasn't been great as not well so left my friends at half five to come home to chuck up (sorry!) .  I was feeling a bit abandoned by my family this year too, got seven brothers and sisters so you would expect 7 invites, but no, just the one (although i'm sure one of my sisters would have invited me too).  Unfortunately didn't feel like spending it with my brother and his wife as she's just had her 20 week scan so i didn't really fancy that after my mc.

Yep, be happy to see the back of it.  Onwards and upwards as they say.

Happy christmas to everyone and thank you so much for all your support and advice, I couldn't have done it without you  

GGx


----------



## aweeze

I don't find the time to come on this side of the singles boards much since the boards were split but I just wanted to pop in to wish you all a very merry Xmas (bit late at the end of a very busy day) and all the best for 2011. I hope each and every one of you has your dreams come true. 

Lou


----------



## Diesy

Cheers GG   Actually did an edit, felt like a sad case making a big fuss out of not much!

Yup, sounds like you did a good thing re Christmas, it's always difficult to know what to do for the best.  I had been going to the family...  I hope you are feeling okay and got the cottom wool body suit on...or the invisible thingy shield.  Taking care of yourself and all that.

Hopefully all change for the better for all next year - Diesy xx


----------



## Bambiboo

Morrigan - What was your Nan doing when everyone else was in RE classes??!  Funny story, made me laugh.

Happy Christmas to everyone.  Christmas starts for me in 30 minutes when I finish my shift at work, go home, get some sleep and then enjoy some Christmas spirits!!!

Love to all

Bambiboo x x x


----------



## acrazywench

A bit belated, but Merry Christmas everyone   . I hope you've all had a happy couple of days. Here's to a 2011 filled with lots of bumps and babes for the lovely singlies in this forum. 

xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I hope that you all had a good Xmas and that Santa was good to you all- I spent it with my donor and his partner and had a great time- and eaten far too much, I'm heading home tomorrow, as my donor is back to work, and his partner is with me the next day and I left a sea of wrapping paper in my place, so best tidy up.
I'm in bed and there is an odd noise that has been bugging me since this morning, I said to the boys your neighbour must have a cloud alarm going-  It turns out it is the foghorn at the marina- too much of a city girl!!!


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I hope that 2011 is a good year for your all, for those with their precious LO's and those longing for theirs.

I had a confusing and disappointing appt at clinic the consultant said my ovarian reserve/ scans etc are so low that I shouldn't do surrogacy with my own eggs, only DE's - but my surrogate will only do it with my eggs for me. She suggested 3 cycles of natural ivf myself- I'm so confused and upset as I think my chances are so low, plus then implantation, NK cells, risk of mc, my odd womb and my Ashermans  come into play. I started crying but my donor was level headed, he has his bloods redone and will go back for a sperm analysis next week.
She kept telling me about a 44 yr old pregnant with natural ivf.
I spent NY eve with my donor we  met a friend for drinks then the 2 of us went for dinner, then down to watch the fireworks with the masses in London & then  home, his partner was working.


----------



## smilingandwishing

Oh JJ how disappointing to have been given that view. Is it worth getting a second opinion? I'm a bit confused; if your consultant is suggesting natural ivf couldn't you use this method to collect eggs to be implanted in the surrogate? I've probably misunderstood. 

I really hope 2011 sees your dream come true. You so deserve it!


Smiling x x


----------



## Lou-Ann

Aww JJ     . I'm not surprised that you are confused either. If the consultant is suggesting that you do natural IVF with your own eggs, then why would your own eggs not be good enough for surrogacy   . As S&W suggests, can you not get a second opinion? You have been through so much already, I hope that you can see a way through this and get what you so deserve this year     

Lou-Ann x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ   
Not a good way to start the year, hope you find a way forward soon
take care
Suitcase
x


----------



## Damelottie

JJ1 - Thats so disappointing. I just feel so bad for you.


----------



## wizard

Oh JJ I'm so sorry.    Like you I don't get why she thinks using a surrogate is a bad idea.  Given the challenges you have surely a surrogate would be better odds.  Will you go back and push the consultant on this?

Wizard x x


----------



## bingbong

Oh JJ I'm so sorry     I really hope that you can find a way forward and am so thankful that you have your donor and his partner who are just so wonderful and supportive to you.

bingbong x


----------



## Roo67

JJ1 - sorry that you had such an upsetting and confusing consult -  I hope that you can find a way forward 

R xx


----------



## lulumead

Hi JJ - so frustrating for you     I do think that Dr N does sometimes assert her opinion when actually you know what would be right for you. She is very honest but sometimes I feel that there is less looking at what your individual circumstance is, just what statistically is the best option.


I think its worth you pushing what you want to do, otherwise she needs to come up with a protocol that works for you in your situation.  I'm sure somehow using a surrogate adds other potential difficulties into the mix but if you aren't convinced that you doing natural IVF is right for you, then I would trust your instincts.  I don't really understand why you can't use your eggs in a surrogate if she is suggesting that you stand a good chance of getting eggs from doing natiVF.


Wish there was something I could do that was more useful. Is it worth talking more to your surrogate about using donor eggs or is it just definitely a no?  Its an amazing thing that she has offered to do so i am sure she has her reasons as to why she feels that wouldn't the right thing for her to do.


xxx


----------



## cocochanel1

Hi JJ1, so sorry to hear you are going through such a hard time. It is so unfair and you deserve to have your baby and not wait this agonising wait any longer. I remember meeting you in London several years ago and we have followed each others journey ever since. I hope so much you can find a solution and have your much wanted baby in 2011. You will make such a great mummy. I think the other girls suggestions are good - worth discussing with your surrogate and also Consultant again now you have had time to reflect.
Thinking of you.
Coco xxx


----------



## greatgazza

JJ1 I'm so sorry that you're having such a difficult and distressing time.  I can't be much help as i'm not in a great place but i'm thinking of you and hope you manage to find a way forward.   

Take care and again i'm really sorry that you're suffering.  There's nothing like this is there.

GGx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GG take care hun


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - so sorry that this is proving to be even tougher for you, if that were possible.     I would hate to advise and wouldn't know what to advise tbh, but as lulumead said, I don't understand why she would say nat IVF would be ok for you but not for surrogate.  That makes no sense to me.

GG - big    for you.  Hope New Year's Eve was ok.

AFM - I'm feeling a bit anxious today as tomorrow I start a new job, start weight watchers and then have a lodger moving in who I haven't met yet.  Sounds a bit reckless I know, but he has given me loads of referees and I've been calling them and they all say he is a great bloke etc (some of them are B&Bs he's been staying at rather than friends IYSWIM), but I guess I'd be a bit nervous with anyone moving in eh?  He'll only be here Mon-Fri though which is good.  Ho-hum, takes my mind of ttc I suppose!   

Hope everyone is ok today


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GAIT wishing you lots of luck for your new job and lodger- I guess if he doesn't turn out well you can get him out, is he on probationary period.  Good Luck with WW, I'm going to rejoin Lighter Life as have piled on the pounds over the last few months.
L x


----------



## smilingandwishing

Giatoo good luck with everything. Lots going on for you at the start of 2011. Hope this year is a fantastic one for you and all you wish for is realised. 

I have already decided I'll be at weight watchers  in february. I have put on so much weight with this pregnancy it is not funny. I keep telling myself Catherine zeta jones put on 5.5  stone and look at her!!!

Love smiling x


----------



## Lou-Ann

GiaToo, hope everything goes ok today   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## GIAToo

Hey lovely ladies, thank you for the good luck wishes.

Job was fine, lodger fine, WW big fat zero, and unfortunately I don't mean the amount i have to lose!   Got there a few mins late, then couldn't find anywhere to park and after driving around for 20 mins, I gave up.  I think it was penance for having 2 mince pies for my tea!!     
I'm going to a different meeting tomorrow now.

Smiling - not long to go now eh I'll be doing something (not sure what yet) on 13 Jan to remember my LO and I'll be thinking of you    Hope it all goes as per your birth plan, although from what I've seen and read, it may be a bit unpredictable!  

How is everyone else?    
GIa Tooxxx


----------



## smilingandwishing

Hi Giatoo,

I hope you find something fitting to do on the 13th and have all the love and support you need around you!

Smiling xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GAIT glad that job & lodger are fine, I hope 13/1 goes by ok and you do something comforting. 

My donor went to clinic to do sperm sample for them, not really sure why. I'm at a slight cross roads Create not doing what I wanted my donor said we can't just keep going to clinic after clinic this will be 8th if I don't like what they say and he won't go to any others.  I feel so depressed by this and can't help feeling that my fertility journey may come to the end of the road as the doors closeend, the guys have agreed to go to LWC for a consult as they have been very gay friendly in the press for surrogacy recently, the boys would have to commission it, I'd be egg donor etc but they have an age limit of using own eggs of 38 and the surrogate has to be under 40- thankfully she is 34! There is always a hurdle.

L


----------



## kizzi79

JJ - words simply fail me! You have had such a hard journey   . I hope that LWC offer you a viable option to move forward - you so deserve to have that baby in your arms right now, rather than the constant hurdles you have faced. Stay strong - i prey you get there soon as you will be a truely amazing mum   

Love Krissi  xx


----------



## lulumead

JJ - crossing my fingers that LWC come up trumps. Surely they can't object to you being the donor if its what your donor and partner request and they are in effect commissioning the surrogacy?


Your journey is definitely sent to test you. If there is any justice you will get some good news soon and be a step closer to becoming a mum. There is no question that you will be ace.


xx


----------



## Rose39

JJ1 - so hoping that LWC are supportive of your plans. Totally agree with Lulu - it's about time you have some really good news hun!     

Rose xx


----------



## smilingandwishing

JJ1 - everything crossed for you!  You are always so good with everyone on here - giving advice and encouragement. You truly deserve a break and for your journey to go in the most positive of directions.

All the best,

Smiling xx


----------



## morrigan

Really hope lwc is the option that will work- you've definitely had enough hurdles x


----------



## greatgazza

Oh JJ1, it's just bl**dy ridiculous isn't it, absolutely bl**dy ridiculous, i can't believe the hurdles you're having to overcome but i so so hope that there are no more twists and turns in your journey and you find a clear path through.

GG x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ - nothing I can add to what the others have said, it's been such a tough journey for you and you deserve a break
Thinking of you 
  
Suitcase
x


----------



## ambergem

Good luck JJ!!


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, really hope that LWC can help you achieve your dream   . As so many of the others have said, you have had such a difficult and long journey, and so deserve a break   . Good luck   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks LWC called my donor's partner back and said that they have those as guidance as that maximises the chances of success etc, and to go for a consultation. So  I hope that they will be able to help. I probably will do a natural cycle at Create  maybe becasue a psychic once told me it would happen when I least expected it!  and also as everything else will take time, appts, ethics, counselling etc.  I was also v surprised that  LWC charge much more than any other clinic for a first consultation £295 each and we need 3 as they won't see us together, so the boys, me and the surro. I haven't paid more than £200 for an appt at any of the other clinics.
I've heard mixed things about LWC, but looks like I have little option- to anyof you who have used their counsellor what are they like?

L x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ - if it's the same counsellor as 3yrs ago, I found her pretty useless tbh - she didn't raise any issues I hadn't already thoroughly worked through myself and I just thought she was a bit 'pointless' as a counsellor really...at the time I only saw her because it was a pre-requisite to tx though and in that sense she's fine - not too challenging and I'm sure you'd be ahead of her on just about every issue she might raise   

really hope things work out for you hun   
Suitcase
x


----------



## ambergem

JJ- I totally agree with what Suitcase has said. I had a telephone consultation which lasted all of about 10-15 minutes!! She was very pleasant though.


----------



## Grace10704

JJ I'd third what suity and linz say about the counsellor.  If it is the same one I saw before I had J then she is useless (harmless but useless!).  I found out more about her than she did about me.  But you will get through the session really easily.  LWC do have mixed reviews though I think they are fab having created both my kids!  They are quite difficult to deal with in the sense they don't get back to you when they say they will, tend to forget to tell you things etc.  However reading your posts I'm guessing you have been through most things already and will inform yourself of what needs to happen so you can just tell them.  That's the way I got my second set of treatment sorted out - didn't let them tell me anything just told them when I was on my way in for treatment!  I so hope they are able to help you though & you finally get where you want to be.
Lots of love xx


----------



## Bambiboo

JJ Perhaps not want you want to hear, but I saw the counsellor a year ago and it was an hour of my life I would like back!!

Admittedly I didn't go in with any real issues, but it seemed to me that she asked her set questions, ticked some boxes and job done.  No exploring of my answers or anything.

I can't believe they are ripping you off for 3 separate consultations!!! What a cheek!!!  

I found all but two members of staff to be very friendly and helpful.  My Consultant was nice.  I did not have a good experience there with EC and aftercare but I think Im in the minority.  As Grace says - it worked for her.

Hope that they have some positive    news for you all,

Love Bambiboo x


----------



## greatgazza

JJ i have no real experience of the 'UK' system at all but i would echo what bambiboo said about it seemingly being a rip off.  Why on earth do you need  separate consultations?  Or even if you have to have one altogether and then half an hour each etc to charge the full whack each time seems ludicrous.  We mustn't forget these people are taking our money.  Harsh but fair I think.  And we mustn't forget that the only person who has our best interests at heart is us.  they will still be raking it in whether we turn up or not.....

I really hope you find the right clinic for your way forward but maybe, if you have a little bit of time, don't rush into going forward with a clinic until you're totally happy with them.

GGx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I'm pleased to hear counsellor isn't too probing and ticks her boxes!


----------



## Bambiboo

No danger of any probing!!!!


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I just had lunch with an old friend and she told me her friend had a first healthy baby at 48 a single lady, Internet man donated sperm & then left them alone as per plan, and her other friend is 49 has 2 older children & discovered she was pregnant & well on her way! So some hope I must take from them.

I went to buy a b'day card for my friend's 13 yr old daughter and the man in the card shop, I got one that said 13 on and the man in the card shop said 'Is it for your daughter as we have some from mother to my teenager'!!  I counted in the place we had lunch 13 babies and buggies- some days you just see them all!!


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Bluprimrose wishing you a very happy birthday hope you're doing something nice today


----------



## Fraggles

Hi JJ

A friend at work is 47 and is due to give birth with her first in 2 months - this gives me hope.

F x


----------



## bingbong

JJ I really hope that all works out at LWC   

Happy Birthday blueprimrose!! I hope that you're doing ok   

bingbong x


----------



## bluprimrose

thank you jj & bb .  Just home - have had a lovely evening thank you.

bb have been meaning to pm you for ages - CONGRATULATIONS on your beautiful babies.  Seems like only yesterday we were sitting at GIAtoo's discussing vitamins (in fact it was 11 months ago!).

Bed now but will post properly soon.

Love & hugs bp xxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Belated Happy Birthday blu x x x


Hope you had a lovely day


----------



## lulumead

Hope you had a lovely day Blueprimrose - I always seem to miss the birthdays   


xxx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Happy belated birthday Blueprimrose   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## sweet1

happy birthday BP - waas that GIA2's chilli and rice day, I can't believe that was 11 months ago.


----------



## GIAToo

Hope you had a lovely night BP       

Sweet SA - yes that was 11 months ago!  Shall I do another one   

Hey girls I fulfilled another life-long ambition last night    I sang with a rock band in a  packed club full of people!    It was the Crisis volunteers party and there was a rock band there called Rockaoke!  I sang Joan Jett's "I Love Rock & Roll" - what a buzz    

I was already on a high by the fact I was actually OUT on a Saturday night   

Hope you're all having a lovely weekend   

GIA Tooxx


----------



## bluprimrose

hello all   


thank you so much for your birthday wishes     .  unfortunately i had to go to a memorial yesterday in the cotswolds so drove there and back in the day.  it was a very sad occasion but a beautiful service in a beautiful church with the sun streaming in the stained-glass windows and i'm so glad i was there to pay respect, give support to friends and celebrate a life cut short.  when i got home though i had a lovely evening so managed a little bit of a birthday celebration (not that i feel like celebrating getting older!   )


i've been rather quiet on the boards recently (almost a year really, i don't know where the time's gone) - but i've still read the boards and kept up with how everyone is, i just felt like taking a bit of a back seat myself.  even so i have still managed to take immense support and inspiration from all you wonderful, strong ladies - ones i know and ones i don't, so thank you all.    and yes, it was GIAtoo's chilli and rice day - it was lovely wasn't it?


i've been wanting to post to update you on my news for a while and keep delaying it but this seems as good a time as any while i'm thanking you for your birthday wishes.  i wasn't quite sure where to post so i hope it's ok here on this thread.


i haven't updated my signature yet with any of my news from 2010 but i will after i've posted, i just feel a bit nervous of committing anything to print!


so, after my 5th failed cycle in december 2009 (where my signature currently ends) i decided to use eggs i had frozen two and a half years earlier - i guessed that they were younger than me which has to be good(!) and the cycle would be so much cheaper than another fresh cycle (and money is certainly not in abundance).  so in march/april 2010 i had the frozen cycle, the eggs had been slow-frozen not vitrified as it was quite a while ago and although they all survived the thaw the cycle didn't work.  i felt down but not defeated.  


i then moved to care in nottingham under dr ndukwe.  i saw professor simon fishel talk at the fertility show at the end of 2009 and was blown away by his stories of array cgh and decided that at my ripe old age if i it was possible to know if i had any chromosomally normal eggs that would be a huge benefit and even better to know that if there were any i would be transferring embryos from chromosomally normal eggs.  so after a zillion tests for everything and with various extra drugs including intralipids, i did a cycle with array cgh in august - i told myself it would be my last before moving onto de.  from ten fertilised eggs, 5 were abnormal, 1 was normal and very frustratingly 4 came back as no signal (normally they expect this to happen in around 10% of eggs tested and mine was 40% which was very disappointing).  this means that they had no idea whether those four were normal or not.  i had three embryos transferred, the normal one and two unknowns, but unfortunately the cycle didn't work.  after that cycle i found it very hard to move on - the fact i knew there was a normal egg inside me made me really want to have 'one more try', but i knew that this had to be the last and i already had my de date.  i was so grateful to have the option of de and was quite excited really knowing that i had a date for a cycle with such a high chance of success compared to one with my oe.


with the financial help of a couple of wonderful people i was able to have that 'one last try'.  in november just gone, i had my egg collection and they got ten eggs of which nine fertilised.  unfortunately they also punctured my bladder during ec and i had internal bleeding and ended up in nottingham city hospital for 5 days!!!  i couldn't believe my (bad) luck and of course totally wrote off the cycle.  i did have some good news two days after i went to hospital - of the nine eggs that fertilised five were abnormal but four were normal.  this was welcome and totally unexpected news but even so i thought how is this going to work out when i have a catheter in (horrid!) with a bag full of blood, was on antibiotics, had x-rays with iodine pumped round my body and there was also talk of general anesthetic and emergency surgery just twelve hours before et.  the doctors were unbelievably amazing and worked so hard to get me better and try to avoid a ga/surgery etc.  in the nick of time they whipped out the catheter and released me for et and then i went back - it was all a bit crazy.  anyway, to cut a very long story not exactly short, but a little bit shorter, a miracle happened and two weeks after i was admitted to hospital i had a blood test and it came back positive.  after two and a half years ttc - even longer preparing and nine cycles i still can't believe it, i am in total shock and am just taking each day at a time.  each hour really.  i am now 9 weeks and 3 days pregnant.  i feel nervous even writing that.  i have seen and heard the baby's heartbeat and at the moment (touch wood) everything is looking good, right measurements etc.  


i hope you don't mind me writing such a long post and telling you my story.  i know it's still early days for me - i am very aware of that, but i feel positive and hopeful and the fact i know that this baby is from a chromosomally normal egg is immensely reassuring.  i kept thinking i want to share my story but i'll wait to post if i get to 12 weeks etc. but then i thought that at whatever stage i post i'll still be cautious and nervous and i was hoping that my story might be able to help in some way.  i never ever admit this.... but i turned 43 yesterday so this feels like a real miracle and i am so grateful to dr ndukwe and to array cgh.  of my five abnormal eggs some looked just as good as the four normal ones and in the past who knows what i had transferred and what i left in the lab.  i have now had a total of 25 embryos transferred, the majority of which looked great, but unfortunately there is no correlation between how the embryos look and whether they are normal or not.  i know array cgh isn't a possibility for everyone but i really think it's something worth considering if you are able.


so that's my story.  of course i pray every day that it continues to be a happy story and i also pray that everyone on these boards realises their dreams.  the journey we are all on is so hard and often so unfair, it feels very random sometimes.  this takes a lot of strength, patience and determination, something everyone who posts on the singles boards on ff has and each and everyone deserves happiness and success in their endeavours.


sending you all love and      and so many thanks again for being here - these boards really are a haven.


bpxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Blu - what fabulous news honey and what a journey to get there!!!  OMG!!


Am so so happy for you x x x


    


Big big hugs x x


----------



## Diesy

Hi Bluprimrose,

You don't know me but I was reading your story there and so willing for a happy ending.  So pleased for you - good luck - long may it continue!  What a lovely story, if they hadn't punctured your bladder, that doesn't sound so good but aw, very happy for you!!!

Diesy


----------



## Roo67

Blu - huge congratulations to you and as mini says what a journey to get there. I'm sure you've got a sticky one there after all you have been through.   

R x


----------



## lulumead

BP: fantastic news     
What a story to get here...am keeping everything crossed that all now goes to plan and you have a very healthy and happy pregnancy.  Come and post on the waiting for 1st scans board if you want to...its where some of us post as we feel too nervous to move to the bumps   


xxxxx


----------



## Teela

Hi BP and welcome back to the boards, wow what a story and an even better, fabulous result.

Like you I have been absent since last Jan 2010 and just returned to the boards in a more active fashion  and another
attempt at OEIVF. I have just left Care Notts as cannot afford another cycle with them even though they are fab, but I am
going to Reprofit as heard equally good things about them.
I wish you all the luck in the world and a happy and healthy pregnancy

Teela
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

BP - what a whirlwind you have been through, I really hope that this is your miracle baby.  Congratulations, wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy
L x


----------



## bluprimrose

thank you so much for all of your lovely messages and good wishes.  it has been a rather bumpy ride but i'm just      that it's a smooth journey from now on.


    too for miracles for all of us.


bp xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

bp - so glad you've 'gone public' with your wonderful news   

sorry, missed your birthday - was supposed to have lovely quiet weekend with 2 girlfriends just sitting around chatting but one of their babysitters cancelled last minute so instead had very lively 2 and 5 yr old to entertain and was completely exhausted by the end of it - had to go to bed at 8pm last night! Makes me realise just how tough it must be for those who have little ones and are pregnant a second time....

anyway, it's just wonderful wonderful news and I'm so pleased for you and hope all continues to go well. as Lulu says, maybe join the waiting for scan thread until you feel ready for the 'bumps' thread - nice to have you back 

Suitcase
x


----------



## some1

Bluprimrose - belated happy birthday wishes and huge congratulations on your pregnancy!!!  Sounds like it was a real roller coaster of a treatment cycle, hope you are completely recovered from your punctured bladder now.  Hope the time until your 12 week scan passes quickly and you can soon begin to really enjoy being pregnant - also hoping you are not suffering too badly with the nasty side effects of pregnancy   

Some1

xx


----------



## Bambiboo

Wow BP, what a lovely story.  Ive just started at Care and so  I was especially excited reading your news!!!

Congratulations x x


----------



## bluprimrose

thank you all again for your lovely words   .  


i'm so glad i've been able to share this with you as you've all helped me so much along the way whether i've been posting or not.


good luck at care bambiboo - they are brilliant!  are you seeing dr nd?



    bp xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Bluprimrose, that is absolutely fantastic news   . What a journey to get there though. Wishing you a smooth ride for the rest of your pregnancy   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## ambergem

Congratulations Bluprimrose!!! So fantastic after the terrible time you've been through. See you in the "waiting for scans" thread soon


----------



## bluprimrose

thank you thank you thank you.     


do you know, it wasn't so bad - the stay in hospital was the first time i managed to rest in absolutely ages - and i even fell a little bit in love with my doctor and used to look forward to his visits!  i'm sure the enforced bed rest helped   .


bpxx


----------



## Bambiboo

Bluprimrose - Im at Care in Northampton so different Doc!!!  Keep hearing good things about Care though x


----------



## bluprimrose

they are very good and will leave no stone unturned - wishing you lots of luck     


bpxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I was planning a natural ivf cycle as create wanted me to do this, I felt sort of pushed into it and not comfortable with the idea, plus I want to loose sone weight & get bmi in okish zone- started a diet yesterday, then the timings for scans et  were a nightmare for me & combining starting a new job on mon, so I had second thoughts, discussed it with my donors partner this am & cancelled it.
L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ - know what you mean about bmi side of things - wanna be healthy so as to have healthy pregnancy etc ... 


          for cancelling this cycle - but sometimes we've got to do what we feel is right for us.  


Your donor and his partner are fabulous - must be so nice to have their support.


Take care x x


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - just want to send you some     
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GIA - thanks for all the   wishing you lots of luck
L x


----------



## Roo67

Sorry you had to cancel JJ1 - but is best to get in the right frame of mind and body before cycling (as you well know)

all the best for your new job - what will you be doing ?
R x


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, sorry you had to cancel     

Lou-Ann x


----------



## bluprimrose

jj i'm so sorry you have had to cancel for now.


i know how disappointing it is when you are all set to get going and there's suddenly a spanner in the works.  


but as roo has said, when you can get started hopefully you'll feel mentally and physically prepared so it'll be worth the wait.


sending love and     


bpxx


----------



## lulumead

JJ - sorry you had to cancel but it sounds like a wise decision. Hoping you can get going again soon.xxxx


----------



## morrigan

Congratulations bluprimrose- what a story !


----------



## bluprimrose

thank you morrigan   .


wishing you luck for your upcoming cycle.      that 2011 is everyone here's year.


bpxx


----------



## greatgazza

Hope everyone on here is doing ok.

Just popped on to say thinking of you today Giatoo   

GGx


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey all,

Thought this was the better post to talk about my adventures in determining the correct route for donation than the abroadies one.

1.  So I've picked out and reserved my donor from Cryos for March if I need to do DIUI with an "open id" donor.  He's genetically a good match so feel good there.

2. I now have 2 guys I'm talking to about being known donor/co-parents.  Weird things are happening in my brain. It's amazing how maternal and protective I've become.  I want the right father, protected by legal contract if it's KD/Co-parent, with someone I actually like.  Or it's not worth pursuing.  
I've decided to give it a month on the match site and see how it goes with these two donors.  One is straight and single and the other is part of a gay couple.  They both seem nice and going to arrange to meet in a very public place over the next week to see if we click at all.  I think it will be hard to get to know someone that quickly so feel better having my open id donor in the back pocket should this not be the route I am going to take.

It's such a journey all of this stuff.  I admire women who do either.  We are miracles.  Determined miracles! 

What an adventure!

Dawn


----------



## GIAToo

GG - thank you hun     Hope you're ok    
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## lulumead

Hi GIAT,
I'm glad you did something nice on your EDD, I'm sure it was very hard.      
xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=244644.528
Just to let you know baby boy Joshua has arrived


----------



## Diesy

Hi Everybody,

I'm having a wee issue and wondered if anyone can help.  Donno if I am just loosing the plot but I'm sure someone sensible can set me on the right road.

In brief I have a problem.  Bought some sperm at a bank. ICI sold out, bought the more pricey IUI.  Within a month they released more ICI, pretty soon after it had sold out.  Have queried this with them and they said it was never sold out, despite what the website said.  Then I complained to them and they have said lump it.  

They have also breached confidentiality, I won't go into details.

I don't like their business model, it's not customer friendly.  I also feel a breakdown of trust in their service and wonder where this ends.  I don't like their attitude which is the customer has no recourse.  I can query the payment on my credit card but I like the donor.  Or I can have the goods reabsorbed to the bank and receive 75% back, loosing £345.  Or I can go ahead and transport the units to the clinic and be peed off about it.

What does anyone think?

Thanks gang,
Diesy


----------



## caramac

Diesy - sorry to hear you've been having trouble with your bank. I wouldn't want them to reabsorb your order as you will be left with nothing and they would be £345 better off for it. Plus you like the donor so you want to keep it. I would perhaps try once again asking them to reconsider their position and allow you to switch your samples from the more expensive IUI to the cheaper ICI type and refund you the difference to provide good customer service, otherwise you could threaten to name and shame them on here and encourage hundreds of other women to think twice before using their services.

But if they decide to hold firm and still refuse, then I think you'll have no choice but to just take the IUI samples and hope you never have to deal with that bank again.


----------



## Diesy

Hi Caramac,

Cheers for that, good to have an impartial opinion.  I'll try once more.  I did mention FF, very gently in my last email.  I also got the European version of trading standards today.  Great, eh, I thought it was bad enough having the fraud squad approve my credit card transaction  

Thanks 
Diesy


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - think we've all had the fraud squad question our payments!!            


Hope you get some way ahead and get things sorted.  I always emailed them direct to get the up to date list - never did trust the website! 


Take care mini x


----------



## Diesy

Cheers Mini...   How are you doing?

Well, thanks again Caramac   Success! Yay! So, I get my donor.  I quoted the number of users online yesterday 

Happy days!  Hope everyone is well 
Diesy xx


----------



## caramac

Yay! Great news Diesy - so pleased they changed their mind and did the right thing by you. Win-win all round!


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - am fine thanks honey - met up with a fellow FFer today and went and had my feet nibbled at the fish pedispa - am addicted!!  All set for the big off - but trying not to think about it too much.
So glad they came to their senses regarding donor - this journey is hard enough without added hassle!!  Great news though!


Take care mini x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Mini I have never tried having feet nibbled by fish as a pre cycle prep!! How was it? I have seen the salons and the pedicure bowls of fish in the dept stores but the thought puts me off- do the feet come out better than a normal pedi?  Does it feel weird??

Wishing you well this time
L x


----------



## Diesy

Cheers Caramac & Mini!  

I sent it in my extra stern email font.  It's only fair I think.  

Good news Mini, not long at all now!  I want to come to one of the meetups things...  Too.  Far.  Away.    Maybe I'll meet folks at Reprofit!  So, March, oooh, that's come fast   Been back to the gym?  Hey, I've found those Pregnacare Conception tabs are great for keep a cold away!   People at work keep asking what vits I take    Oh, can the fish nibble away the pounds?

Not long for you to go Caramac!  Very exciting   Are you knitting?

byee...should really join the Reprofit thread one of these days!
Diesy xx


----------



## caramac

Knitting?!!!! Lol! No chance. I've been given an absolute mountain of baby clothes so no need to buy (or knit!) anything for a long while.

Definitely join in the Reprofit thread for the month you'll be out there. I met up with people each time I was out there and it was really nice to have some company. Most of the time I met up with couples (or at least women who were part of couples) but on my last time I got to meet up with Fraggles and it was nice to meet another single lady!


----------



## Diesy

Someone will knit something, no doubt.  

I remember reading something, way when I first joined about Reprofit, hot choc and The Back-Up Plan.  Was that you guys? Getting there step by step.  Happy to see everyone's story progressing 

Right, off to join the Reprofit thread, have checked in to see a few times...


----------



## Betty-Boo

Ah I wish those fish did eat away pounds - weigh  in today and boy was I naughty over Christmas ha ha ha ...


JJ - it's really good and feet do feel really soft afterwards - have been going quite regularly - they do laugh at me and ask if I've named every fish!  I can only liken it to small bubbles against your feel - think its the thought of putting them in that's alarming.  Strawberries came with me today - but she didn't out her feet in but did put her hand in to try it ... The arch tickles the most and boy do I shriek!!  having a thai foot massage too next time .. I'm up for an FF pamper meet!!  All in preparation for treatment!! LOL .. They are supposed to help circulation so can't be bad.


Have to say Diesy - my feet were a size 12 - now a size 6!    

All the best x x


----------



## Roo67

I had a fishy pedicure a couple of weeks ago, really need to get another one soon. I thought it felt like I had pins and needles in my feet, not at all unpleasant, I think it is just the thought of it.

R x


----------



## Diesy

I bought a voucher to go and get fish nibbled but I didn't realise it was in the middle of the shops.  Now a bit worried the fish aren't looked after.  Mini, do they look happy?

My feet are size 3!  

Can someone invent fish that nibble thighs?  And I don't mean piranhas!


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - where I go the fish look extremely happy - they are well looked after and fed every day - not only with feet      it is similar to when pins and needles subside .. feet are feeling fab.  Was told to stay away from ped-egg as its supposed to take away too much skin that your body then over compensates and you end up with even more hard skin.  Mines a result from wearing combat boots for work ... boo .... 


Enjoy!!! x


----------



## Diesy

Happy fish - not just fed with feet!  Teehee!  I don't wear combat boots, but my little feet swim around in shoes.  Maybe I'll go check out the lil fishies up here to see how happy they look.  

Trying to work out if I'm going in Feb to Reprofit...  Putting off joining the thread till I know...I want to go...

Diesy  xx


----------



## Roo67

Diesy - it's a Jan, Feb, March thread so come and join us - we're a friendly bunch !!


the mods ok too


----------



## greatgazza

really Roo?  I heard she was a 'mare??!  

GGx


----------



## Betty-Boo

heard it does depend on whether cycling and time of the month!!!  Hormones!!


----------



## Diesy

Got a strange feeling that Roo has something to do with the Reprofit thread 

Thanks for the welcome, Roo!  I'm a bit of a commitment phobe, so haven't joined...even though I'm thinking of going soon maybe...


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey all,

My meeting with my potential co-parent and his partner went well.  Nice guys.  I'm going to leave it to them to come back to me and hopefully meet up again to chat things through.    (Why am I always so much taller than everyone though *laugh*? ) I'm meeting with another potential gentleman tommorrow and going to decide in the coming weeks what I want to do next.  

I know the amount of time to truly get to know someone in a co-parenting situation could be weeks/months and most often years.  I don't have years.  This is so  frustrating.  I know, in my heart, that sharing parental responsibility would be a good thing for me.  Another pair or two of hands to help me when things get rough and I need a weekend/night off. Someone to share the burden of responsibility around finances and schooling etc.    It would mean my child/ren would grow up knowing their father and having him in their lives.  I also know the heartache involved in traditional divorced co-parenting situations.  I'm still trying to get my head around how this could be different with co-parenting intentionally?  If anyone has any sage advice that would be wonderful.

Thanks for bearing with my frustration and blathering on and on.  

Dawn


----------



## Diesy

Darn, got it wrong - The Minx has something to do with moderating on Reprofit thread - I'm traditionally slow on the uptake!

Hey Dawn - good to hear your making progress - this business is way too slow I find.  And it's just me sorting it all out for me!


----------



## morrigan

Jj1 that's sounds like a real positive step forward- I hope appointment goes well and you start to have good news.


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, sounds like you have come up with a positive plan. I hope that the appt goes well and I'm    that they can make your dreams come true   . Good luck!

Lou-Ann x


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Way to go on the decision JJ. I will keep my fingers crossed for you!

Dawn


----------



## Roo67

JJ1 - great that you have made a decision, I hope ARGC give you the go ahead.     


r x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ all the best honey        




Mini x x


----------



## Bambiboo

Wishing you all the best at ARGC       

Love Bambiboo x


----------



## Teela

Fantastic news JJ, I really hope this works for you, you so deserve it. Keeping everything crossed
it all comes together as logistically sounds as though it will be a challenge

Teela
x


----------



## bingbong

JJ sounds good, I really hope that they are happy to do what you want and that all goes well. Keep us posted.

 
bingbong x


----------



## greatgazza

JJ huge PMA and huge hugs   .  Fantastic that you are moving forward.  As I believe Yazz once said 'the only way is up'

GG xxx


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey all,

Last weekend I met a lovely lady doing a Phd at Cambridge on single women deciding to have donor insemination. The interview process was great and I felt really good knowing there are others out there who are going through what I am. I feel really excited as I was able to rationalise through my feelings as well as hopefully help a future generation of single women.

Here's a link to her request if anyone else is interested in helping her:

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=254972.0

Dawn


----------



## Bambiboo

Thanks for the link Dawn, have emailed the lady as sounds interesting.

Bambiboo x


----------



## morrigan

Dawn I think I've signed up to the same research project with that Cambridge lady - she came and interviewed me she was really nice.


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey all,

Just checking in... I've had a hell of a weekend.  My friends, family and therapist are driving me nuts.  I've got opinions flying around everywhere about using a donor versus co-parenting.  This decision is the hardest I've ever made and just feel so confused.  

I had my 11 day follicle scan on friday and have 6 healthy follicles and my womb lining is doing fine so the move to go to TX next month will be find if I go that route.

I've decided to stop asking people what I should do and just sit for a few weeks and follow my gut.

Fortunately I've been blogging about my experience so feel grateful I've begun to process it all.

Dawn


----------



## Bambiboo

I can't believe they wouldn't let  you back into your seats!!!!!  What a cheek.  You should write and complain and suggest next time the staff administer life saving first aid so you can get back to watching the show!!!   

Im sure the lady was very grateful to you all.

Bambiboo x


----------



## morrigan

JJ thats awful- I would definietly complain to the theatre and go to the press- theyd love that story! - they should of upgraded you and brought you champagne. Not sure they realise how rare it is to find someone willing to step in and help.

Hope you enjoyed your evening anyway- at least it was better than the lady who had a cardiac arrest.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I had my bloods done yesterday  and my FSH was 9.5, last month 8.8 and the month before 17.1- so I am pleased that it is under the magic 10 that you need to get through the doors of ARGC, as our appt is Fri pm!!

L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Fab news JJ on FSH        for Friday!  Wishing you all the very best.  You so deserve this happiness after the journey you've been on.  


Thinking of you x x x


----------



## GIAToo

Ooh JJ1 - that is good news!! Good luck for Friday        

GIa Tooxxx


----------



## morrigan

woo hoo JJ- Brilliant news- good luck for friday- whats the secret in bringing your fsh down do you think?


----------



## lulumead

Brilliant news JJ     


Crossing everything that you find a way forward at ARGC - it is very much deserved.
x


----------



## greatgazza

Fantastic news JJ      Huge     for Friday

GGx


----------



## Bambiboo

Hi

Not sure where to post this so going to put it here!!!

Sorry if TMI but I had a trial ET today and a few hours later had quite a lot of fresh bleeding.  It was more than spotting, not AF type bleeding either.  Also some discmofort which I know is possible.

I'll ring the clinic tomorrow, but is this normal do you know?  I guess that Im anxious that this will happen for the real ET and the blood will wash my little embies away.

Can anyone give me some advice please??

Thanks

Bambiboo


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Bambiboo sorry to hear about your bleeding I once had bleeding after a trial ET where they had been v rough and caused trauma to the cervix with the instruments- hopefully it is all still safe in the uterus where the embryos are, and it is from around the cervix- ring your clinic they may ask you to increase the progesterone etc wishing you luck x


----------



## Bambiboo

Thanks JJ.  It didn't hurt at the time.  Come to think of it, they initially couldn't get the catheter in (never been a problem before!) and had to reposition the speculum (is that the right word??!!).

Will ring them this morning and see what they say.

xx


----------



## Rose39

Fantastic news JJ1! Good luck for Friday!     

Bambiboo - hope that you get a reassuring answer from your clinic hun   

Rose xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, fantastic news! Good luck for your appt on Friday   

Bambiboo, hope that you have got some reassurance from your clinic this morning   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Bambiboo

Hi


I spoke to the nurse at the clinic who said that it can't be a heavy bleed as my lining is only 2.2 (not sure if that was code for - don't exaggerate Bambiboo).  Anyway she said as it seems to be stopping it was probably just the cervix unsettled by the catherer and not to worry. 

She said it wouldn't affect my embies if it happened during the real thing.  Still not convinced how that can be but what do I know??!!!

I start stimms Friday night.

Thanks for all your help girls x x


----------



## morrigan

Bambinio- I always bled after my Iuis the nice midwife at Stork told me it is normal and to do with trauma of  cervix and won't effect chances of pregnancy- also slight bleed at ET is a good sign your lining is pucker! so dont worry if it happens at ET to- Tell them to be more gentle next time !!!!!!


----------



## Bambiboo

Morrigan -thanks. Its weird because never had it with an IUIs and they were somethimes more uncomfortable than ET was.  Ho hum, will see what happens!!  x x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Bambiboo were they doing an ET with your lining on 2.2mm!! hope the bleeding has stopped
L x


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - I think she said it was a trial ET so no embryos involved at all - correct me if I'm wrong Bambiboo

GIA tooxx


----------



## Bambiboo

Yes it was just a trial - don't worry!!!!   

Start stimming on Friday for the real thing!!

xxx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi

Just a quickie to say if there are any singles who fancy coming to the meet up on Sunday in London it's not too late, here is the link for your info, all details on first message of thread. Just send me a pm by Friday and I can add you to the list.

xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Bambiboo that's a relief I got muddled up and was hoping your embryos were safe- but they are in the making stage!!


----------



## wizard

JJ great news, well done.  All the best for Friday.

Bambiboo good luck with this cycle.

Wizard x


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Good luck on Friday JJ!


----------



## Roo67

I hope your appointment goes well tomorrow JJ1

r x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I had a really positive appt at ARGC so just trying to arrange things to get going, and hoping that my FSH doesn't rocket, it will take a few months before we can get going, need legal, counselling and surrogate to come over and be assessed.

I am working where I was 25 years ago and I bumped into a man who used to play football with my ex, wsa hs friend, come round to our place etc, he used to be a good looking guy but has aged a lot, he was saying that he still worked in the same place, lived in the same room so therefore no long term relationship, and he said how ironic he's seen me as he'd bumped into my ex of 13 yrs a few months ago, he said how my ex now had a child- I didn't know and was surprised- but anyway he has got a DD.  It makes me think even more how futile my life is- slightly better than the guy I met, as his life seems to have stood still, but my ex didn't want children and yet there he is with a family now. 
L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ fab news re appt at ARGC Yay      


Re ex's and children - know how you feel - its so darn heart wrenching when we hear of those we had been with going on to have what we yearn - but when they were with us they didn't give 2 hoots!       


Take care mini x


----------



## Damelottie

JJ1 - not nice to hear


----------



## lulumead

JJ1 - great news about the appointment and the way forward becoming clearer. Very exciting.


Not so nice to hear about the ex. Big     
xxx


----------



## morrigan

oo thats rough JJ but at least you have had an encouraging appointment- How quickly will it move now?


----------



## indekiwi

JJ1,       I hope you are finally on the way to meeting your own little one now.  

A-Mx


----------



## Lou-Ann

JJ, glad to hear that your appt went well   , not so nice to hear about the ex though    

Lou-Ann x


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - great news that you can get going with ARGC!    Poo about the ex - I hate thinking about any of my exes with children   it feels unfair, but for me I wouldn't really want any of those men in my life now, so I hope it's the same for you.    
GIA Too xxx


----------



## Rose39

JJ1 - so pleased that the appointment went well, fantastic news that you're another step nearer   . It must have been very hard and a shock to learn about your ex - but if he never wanted children (and so many pregnancies are unplanned that despite never wanting children he may have ended up with one) then he might not be a great dad. 

Picking up on what GIAToo says - I agree entirely! I was with someone for several years who didn't want children, then he married his next G/F and had 2 children (which really upset me at the time) , then they divorced..... he got back in touch a couple of years ago and said he would have a child with me but he had become such an arrogant plonker - or rather he probably had been all along but I didn't see it - that I turned him down flat! 

If you think about all the things that got on your nerves about your ex when you were together, and all the things you didn't like about him, then think of all the wonderful things that your donor and your donor's partner have done for you, and how kind and caring they are - you're much better off without him hun and they are worth 100 of him! Sending you big hugs     

Rose xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ -     - always hard when an ex appears to have moved on and got the 'perfect life' but all is probably not how it seems and there's always a good reason why an ex is an ex

And such good news re ARGC appt - I do hope you can now move forwards quickly with the planning and you have your very own family soon   

Thinking of you, it's not easy I know, and you have had a particularly hard and long journey to get to this point...
Suitcase
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I phoned trying to arrange the counselling - for the one appt for 4 parties involved us, surro and her partner -seen in 2 separate sessions and a report it will be about £900, plus the charge an extra £910 admin fees per cycle, and you need a  load more bloods I've nevr had before (not NK cells) but things like cf carrier, karyotyping for me and then legal/wills etc- it is very expesive just to do the same IVF cycle that we have done before!


----------



## wizard

JJ, so sorry to hear about the ex, well more importantly how it made you feel.     (for what it's worth, your life is not futile simply on the basis that you have said so many kind and supportive things to me.  Although I understand in the grand scheme of wanting your own child that's how it feels).

But great news about moving forward with ARGC.  Not so great about the counselling though.  That's a heck of a lot of money.  Are you tied to ARGC for the counselling?  It all seems so money making   

Wizard x


----------



## LoubyLou42

Hi Everyone

Haven't been around for a while as I took some time out after my 2nd round of IVF went wrong last August.  However - some great news.  I changed clinics to The Lister, started from scratch and ended up with 2 fantastic grade blasties that have worked.  found out yesterday at 7 week scan that, all being well, I'm having twins!  Confess to being shell shocked and have no idea how I'll cope but after a year of disappointment and not getting anywhere I feel finally like I can begin to look forward.

Anyway - just thought I'd say hi - was in touch with some of you last time around and great news to see that you are still going.  Would love to hear about relevant posts and others at the same stage or anything really.  Just lovely to be in touch with some singles going through the same thing.

Look forward to hearing from you all.

LoubyLou
xx


----------



## lulumead

Great news Loubylou! Come over the singlies waiting for 1st scan board...this tends to be where people are hanging out before they feel ready to post on the bumps board.


Been quite a run of twins recently...how exciting.
xxx


----------



## morrigan

Congratulations Loubylou42- fantastic news- there seems to be a growing collection of twinnies on the singles boards.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Louby lou great news about the twins congratulations you must be schocked/thrilled/excited wishing youba happy pregnancy

Thanks for your good wishes girls

I finally found my previously counsellor- she'd moved house but is happy to do the counselling stuff for £86 per hr including reports and only needs 2 hrs so £174!!

Wizard thanks so pleased to see your ticker moving along hope you are feeling ok

L x 

Wizard


----------



## Lou-Ann

Loubylou, congratulations! Wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy   

JJ, glad that you have tracked your old counsellor down and have made a huge saving on the bill!   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## bluprimrose

congratulations loubylou and jj - wonderful news on both counts!   .


hello to everyone else   .  hope you're all doing well.


   bpxx


----------



## lulumead

Great news about counsellor JJ1 - those prices seemed ludicrous!!
xx


----------



## LoubyLou42

Thanks everyone - really nice to be back in touch - it's always so supportive here.

Will keep posting!
xxxx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi

Can anyone remind me the blood tests e.g chlamydia, hep b and c etc that we need before tx pl?

Ta

x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Does depend where u are cycling and oe or de?
HIV,cmv, blood group- won't be needed if you have done it before

Fsh,lh,oestrodial,prolactin,inhibin b,progesterone if own eggs


----------



## Fraggles

Thanks JJ> I am going to a gum clinic tomorrow which will they do would you know?


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

they'll do infection screen so all STI bloods and swabs HIV, hep b and c. Might do cmv if you ask they. If you say you want a full mot as you have had previous sexual partners and now want to settle down and have a child ( wirh one) and want full screen before trying. They Might not do them if you say for ivf, or some charge if you want paper copies- as the porn/escort industry need them to have paper proof for work and some clinics charge them for the paper copy, guesss it might be tax deductible! 

Your Gp might do your fertility hormones fish,lh progesterone, blood group.

My Gp kindly gave me a form for my bloods needed at Argc so saves me about £700!
L x


----------



## Fraggles

Thanks JJ. Went to Lydia Clinic at Guys and they were done free of charge and as it was for fertility they will print out results for you to take away also free of charge.


Had a good day my GP will write a private prescription for me for my drugs which will now save me about £300 on my original costs as previously I was using scripts from overseas. Yay.


What blood tests did you need?


xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

wow that is good of your GP.

I needed cystic fbrosis, and karyotyping (those 2 would have cost me £450 alone via ARGC)  that I have never needed for OE or DE IVF and all the usuall raft of IVF bloods doing, like they chareg £100 for HIV

L X


----------



## Fraggles

Wow £100 that is expensive. How are things? Good news about the counsellor.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

things are good going in the right direction atm, 

Good Luck

L x


----------



## Fraggles

Well that is great news and long may it continue.


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey Ladies,

Just wanted to check in I am in CZ for my StimDIUI.  All is going well.  I've met up with a fellow FF and so grateful for the support on here.

I get my pregnyl shot tommorrow and insemination on tuesday.

Fingers crossed as have 3 follies that are mature.

Dawn


----------



## Betty-Boo

All the best Dawn       


Take care Mini x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

good luck dawn


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey Ladies,

Now I'm officially on the 2ww after my IUI yesterday!  I'm back in the UK now.  Thanks to Teela and Morrigan for being such good company in Brno. I could not have had two more experienced and friendly ladies as my treatment buddies.

Hope everyone else is well.

Take care,

Dawn


----------



## Bambiboo

Good luck Dawn   

Bambiboo x


----------



## lulumead

good luck Dawn    
x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I've got our counselling appts and my surrogtes ohysical health check all arranged for the end of the month so kicking off!!
L x


----------



## Diesy

Good luck Dawn!

And JJ, that's cool!  
Come round fast!!!

Diesy


----------



## ambergem

Great news JJ, so pleased you've got things sorted to get going at the end of the month   hope it comes round really quickly for you. Good luck   

Linz xx


----------



## GIAToo

Great news JJ1 - hope it all goes really well from here on in!           
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## Fraggles

Well hello there GiaToo are you temporarily out of hibernation? How are you feeling now?


----------



## GIAToo

Hi Fraggles,
I'm ok.  Have felt sooooo sick the past 2 days that I decided to tell my new boss (the one who started on Tuesday!) that I was pg.  I just look so ill and was really struggling to get through the day and my tolerance of other people has been non-existent.   Anyway, she was delighted for me and I briefly said I was "going it alone" and she said "every day I am learing what a brave woman you are" (I think she was talking about the fact that I had been working as an actress too -oh and she loves the theatre!).  Anyway, she may still get rid of me at the end of my contract, but I felt a great weight had been lifted off my shoulders tbh.

How are you?     
GIA Tooxxxxx


----------



## Fraggles

GiaToo I am delighted for you she sounds lovely. ANy plans this weekend? I am of the opera. Found out there seems to be a great show on called the Accomplice at the Mernier chocolate factory and very original. x


----------



## lulumead

Thats good news GIAT   


JJ1: brilliant news - feels like it is starting to take shape and get moving   


xx


----------



## GIAToo

Fraggles - just resting, quick visit to parents and rehearsing on Sunday.  Your weekend sounds fun, just what you need   

lulumead - thanks.  How did your boss take it in the end?

xxxx


----------



## bingbong

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=258199.new#new

Thought people might like to post here today  but I'll say it here too- Happy Birthday Suity!!!!

bingbong x


----------



## lulumead

Thanks for the link BB....I never know where to find those!


GIAT:  thanks for asking...my boss was clearly delighted at the idea that I won't be around for a while    Oh well, she'll have the massive project to manage so might feel differently when reality hits!!


xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks so much for your PM's and good wishes - my surrogate has pulled out this week, so it is back to sqaure one and the drawing board for me- needing eggs and a surrogate it a tough comb to find.  I am gutted and not sure which way to turn. 

L x


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ - am totally lost for words.  
Are you with the boys this weekend??    


Take good care x x x


----------



## greatgazza

Oh JJ I am speechless too.  My stomach absolutely sunk reading your post I'm so so sorry     

GG xxxx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Oh JJ, words fail me too, I am so sorry     

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Fraggles

Hi
AM so sorry JJ.

If anyone fancies a random meet up in April let me know am busy the first three weekends but at the moment an unsupportive mother who I could throttle at the moment has got me mad. She never asks about my tx and when I told her how well my embies had responded she supportingly (sarcasm here in case you miss it and I am too subtle) told me that it would be good news if I had my own house and a job. Well you know how to hit someone where it hurts. ARrrghhhhh hold me back.

xxx


----------



## lulumead

Hi JJ,     wish I could help with which way turn to. Its seems you really are being tested to the limits. You really deserve a break soon. Hope the boys are looking after you.




Fraggles:    for your mum not being very helpful/supportive.  Not useful at all - hope the triplets/sextuplets are coming on nicely   


xx


----------



## some1

Oh JJ1, I am so sorry to hear that your surrogate has decided to pull out   , that must be so hard for you as you have been making plans for so long.  I feel gutted for you and can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling   .  Hope you manage to come up with a way forward, and hope you have your lovely boys to support you this weekend.

Some1

xx


----------



## morrigan

Jj that sucks - I really hope the answer is just around the corner- big hugs.


----------



## bingbong

JJ just to send you some more      it just seems so unfair. I really hope that a way forward becomes clear to you soon   

bingbong x


----------



## Mifi

Hi ladies    

I dont really know where to start but although you may not recognise my name I am not new to FF in fact one of the golden oldies still fighting to fulfil my dream    I haven't posted on FF for quite a while as my identity on here was compromised so it kinda put me off    I felt like my diary had been read         so I come back with some caution.

I have also been very poorly and had to spend a few weeks in hospital and I also lost my job, so it has been an awful 6 months tbh    I feel like im having to start my life over again   

Anyway onwards and upwards and hopefully I get to start my next IVF in a few weeks    

  JJ so sorry to read your news     hope you are getting lots of support from friends and family    

Love Mifi xx


----------



## Fraggles

Mifi welcome back. xxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Mifi - great to see you back      for all you've been through.  All the best at Reprofit x x 


Fraggles - hope you're now home now - tucked up in bed and resting x


----------



## some1

Mifi - welcome back    Sorry to hear of the rough time you have been through, hoping that this is your turning point and things are about to get much, much better   

Some1

xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

just wanted to send lots of      to JJ - hope you find a new way forwards very soon

and hello, welcome back and    to mifi

Suitcase
x


----------



## cocochanel1

Jj1 I'm absolutely gutted for you. Luck has to turn your way soon. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this xxx

Fraggles parents can be so trying. 

Mifi welcome back. 

Coco xxx


----------



## kizzi79

JJ - words fail me, such a shame to have lost your surrogate after all your work, really hope the boys are looking after you   

Will be thinking of you, Love Krissi  xxx


----------



## lulumead

hope you are doing ok JJ.   


Welcome back Mifi    for a stressful few months, hopefully the tide has now turned...not sure I can work out what your previous incarnation was   
xxx


----------



## indekiwi

Mifi,    Have been thinking of you off and on for a while now and hoping you were okay.     for having had to put up with such an awful set of circumstances these past several months and     that this coming cycle is going to be the making of a BRILLIANT year for you.   

JJ1, the despair must seem endless   .  There must be a way forward for you hon, surely this is a final cruel twist before your dream finally becomes reality.  I refuse to believe otherwise.     

Fraggles, if your mother was your boyfriend, I'd suggest you ditch her...d'oh! Gotta love family some times.     

A-Mx


----------



## Teela

JJ I am lost for words, you so deserve a bloody break hun    

Hi Mifi, I,m not sure who you were in a previous life but welcome back,   we may have spoken before as Ive been around
a few years now, no further on tho   

Teela
x


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

JJJ1 - So sorry to hear about your surrogate. I pray that your answer comes soon.  You deserve for your dreams to come true   

Fraggles - Your mom sounds like my dad.  I live 5000 miles away from my family for a reason.   I figure that I have supportive friends around me that love and care for me and that's enough for my children.  God will provide the job, house, husband and supportive in-laws in his time.  

Dawn


----------



## ambergem

Welcome back Mifi   you've been missed   so sorry you've had such a hard time  . I'm praying really hard that your luck changes very soon        

Likewise JJ, I really hope you get a change of luck soon    . I'm so sorry to hear your latest bad news     

Fraggles-    

Much love 

Linz xxxxx


----------



## Rose39

Welcome back Mifi - from one golden oldie to another! I was wondering how you were doing and hope with all my heart that this time you have a successful cycle     

JJ1 - as said by PM hun, I'm so, so sorry that you have had such rotten luck. I'm convinced that this is purely a very temporary setback and that you will find a way forward soon. Sending you big hugs    

Rose xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Mifi welcome back and best of luck 

Thanks for your kind words, I'm going to the counsellor tomorrow so maybe she'll help me rethink

L x


----------



## lulumead

Hi JJ - hope tomorrow is useful. Let us know how you get on...we are all willing you onwards.
xxx


----------



## Diesy

Sorry to hear your update JJ!
     
Hoping for a way forward for you!
 Diesy


----------



## GIAToo

JJ1 - sending more hugs      Hope that your counselling session gives you some ideas about the way forward    
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## wizard

Oh JJ I am so so sorry    That's awful news and you must be so gutted.  I hope the counsellor is helpful in some way    

Mifi welcome back    I had wondered how you were (and sorry to hear you haven't been well) 

Wizard x


----------



## Elpida

JJ, words fail me. I really hope that your counsellor is helpful    


E x


----------



## Damelottie

JJ1 - I just came on and read your news. I am so so sorry    . Is there any possibility she might change her mind - not last minute wobbles?? Such dreadful news - I can hardly believe it


----------



## smilingandwishing

Hi all,


JJ - I am so sorry to hear your news.  You so deserve a break - I hope your councellor can help you find a path.

Fraggles - let me know if there is another meet up - I'd love to catch up with everyone.

Hope everyone is well.  J is 11 weeks on Thursday and thoroughly entertaining ( even when he chooses to sing for nearly an hour at 5am).

Smiling xx


----------



## Fraggles

Hello Smiling How are you doing?

Next meet up is 22nd May. Usual place, usual time.   

x


----------



## smilingandwishing

Hi

We're doing well. Hope you're good. 
22nd may is my Mum's birthday so won't make it - shame but will do my very best to make it to the next one. T x


----------



## LoubyLou42

golly, I go away for a week or so and so much happens.

JJ - am so sorry to hear your news.  This is such a long, hard journey and having to dig deep every time something goes wrong is really tough.  Thinking of you and keeping my fingers crossed.

I'm finally beginning to feel better.  In fact this is the first evening I've been able to sit at my computer after 5pm and not want to throw my guts up.  So hopefully that'll mean I'll be in touch with you all a bit more.  

Lots of you have moved on which is great news.  GIAtoo - you and I are running the same at the mo - I had my 12 week nucal scan too last week - what a milestone.  Now waiting for results of that with bloods before, fingers crossed, going public.  My mother came with me and witnessed her first scan ever - she didn't stop talking through the whole thing so I had to tell her to be quieter so the sonographer could do her measuring.  Mum's last comment was "is it breach"!! 

Mifi - good for you for going again.  Keeping my fingers crossed for you too.

Happy Sunday tomorrow everyone.

LoubyLou
xx


----------



## some1

Loubylou -    to your mum's 'is it breech?' comment!! Hope you get your blood results through and can enjoy the limelight when you go public!

Thinking of all the mummies in waiting on Mother's Day    Hoping that you are all closer to being mummies now than you have ever been before     

Some1

xx


----------



## Mifi

Ladies thank you all so much for the welcome back.

Big hugs to you all


----------



## Fraggles

Hi


OK OK maybe perhaps I am thinking a little far ahead but just wondered if there are any singlies on here looking to go to Reprofit and considering buying known donor sperm from Xytex? Reason I ask is I am looking to purchase some vials and thought if anyone else is looking to do the same they might be interested in sharing shipping costs?


Fraggles x


----------



## greatgazza

Fraggles a LITTLE far ahead??!!  Holy moly girl take a chill pill and enjoy the moment hahah     Plenty of time to think about that kindof stuff when you've got your feet up after a short waddle to get whatever your craving is out of the fridge/garden/pond!!!  

GG xx


----------



## Fraggles

GG I can tell you no that my baby is a pick n mix baby.


----------



## sweet1

Morning ladies 

Apologies for the moan as there has been so much positive stuff and BFP's on here lately which is wonderful  

At EC having done mini IVF today only 1 egg was collected  I have to call tomorrow to see if it fertilised, but I am finding it hard to remain positive. It's difficult as the more negative stuff that happens the less I feel I can post or come to the meet ups, which is really hard for me as I have made some great friends and always found everyone so supportive. I know I need to snap out of feeling like this as I don't want to lose touch with people on here, and I feel like I am letting people down by not posting much and offering messages of support. 

I am sick of Brno, I feel that I might as well never have come here at all, let alone 5 times. I know I should remain positive till it's over for good but I just can't see it working  

I know a lot of people have been through a lot more than me so I am sorry for moaning, but I feel like I am among friends here and won't be judged. I am truly happy for everyone recently that has got a BFP.  It's the financial aspect as well, if this tx fails I will need to save up the best part of a year to afford another one and also to accrue enough leave. I find it hard to hide what I am doing and where I am from people at work.

Anyway that's it for now, I hope noone minds me letting off steam a little   I will probably be ok in a few days. I'll just have to see how the one egg does  

SSA x


----------



## Fraggles

Sweet SA sorry you are feeling down. 

Does your company have a policy for fertility leave? I found out unbeknownst to me that my company did and whilst I haven't taken any the other times got three days this time. 

Alternatively I know you to have to raise the money first but you could get signed of by your GP for a laproscopy or something similar if you feel that you could do that.

x


----------



## morrigan

sweet sa    fingers crossed with your embie- it only takes one. brno is better if theres people to meet up with- have you posted on the czech board to see who elses is out there- you will get there- its normal to feel despondant- rest up today xx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi
Sweetsa have you got a laptop with you? I downloaded loads of movies from itunes to keep me amused.
Morrigan, how are you doing?
A


----------



## GIAToo

SweetSA - feel free to let off steam hun, this is a very difficult journey     I am    that your little egg fertilises and becomes "the one".  Try to take each day at a time for now (I know it's hard) and then IF this doesn't work out, perhaps you could meet up with a few of us to help you think about the next steps and the way forward.   

GIA Tooxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

SweetSA - honey they always aim for 1 good embie when using min ivf ....        


I would see if anyone else is about on the Czech boards - am sure someone would love to meet up for a gab and a coffee....


I did the laptop thing with plenty of DVDs ... And thank god for Fraggles being there too - had some good company for meal times.  It does make a difference meeting up with others.


Take care hun -    for your little embie 


Mini x


----------



## sweet1

Thank you ladies. I will try to keep positive till I know one way or t'other!

And thank you GIA Too, that would be lovely. 

Hello Mini and Morrigan and Fraggles and everone else *waves* thank you for your continuing support. I've been to the cinema as my little laptop probably can't cope with downloading too much stuff, and I don't have it here with me anyway.


----------



## lulumead

Big    Sweet SA... remember we are here for when its tough as much as when its good!  Always post if you are finding it hard because you can guarantee someone else is feeling or has felt that way and will get a lot from reading what you have said and the support others offer.


Sending     for your little egg to become a lovely embie and a beautiful baby   
xxx


----------



## sweet1

it fertilised so I am happy today  let's see what tomorrow brings   Thanks for all the positive vibes ladies.


----------



## GIAToo

Sweet SA - Yay!!!!      Think positive - this could be THE ONE!        
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## lulumead

excellent news. Crossing fingers for this one to be the one.     
xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wishing your embryo lots of luck- I've met several babies who were the one & only egg!! X


----------



## bingbong

Great news SSA       

bingbong x


----------



## greatgazza

Fab news sweet SA.  Lots of luck   

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Yay Sweet SA what wonderful news.

AFM have done the first day of my hypnobirth practioner course and seen a few dvd's of women giving birth with hypnobirthing and it looks great. Feeling empowered.

x


----------



## Mifi

Hi ladies   

Things seem to be moving pretty fast for me now    just waiting for AF which is due tomorrow and then will start stims on day 2    im excited but TERRIFIED ive never been abroad before for tx or had the short protocol either so should be interesting. Really hoping that I can join the Reprofit sucess stories      any czech tips will be more than welcome   

After my last tx cycle left me with major reactive depression and a complete nervous breakdown with a six week hospital stay I feel that this year will probably be my last chance to try and fulfill my dream of being a mommy    financially and mentally I have been crippled and I know I will have to accept I can only really cope with one or two more cycles before I have to throw in the towel so to speak. 

This journey has been so much longer and harder than I ever imagined    but I know that im not alone with that    

My endurance and experiences has changed me - in some ways for the good but mostly in a negative way. I just     with all my heart that it will be worth it in the end and when I get to hold my baby all the hurt and pain will fade away     

One thing I really wanted to say if there are any ladies out there who are really struggling please seek help from friends, family, and professionals. You are welcome to pm me as well as I HAVE BEEN THERE    I can honestly say that if I hadnt been hospitalised and had the professional help that I needed I probably wouldnt be here today    Dont be ashamed that it has taken over (as I was    ) with the right treatment and support you can get through it      

Those of you that have your precious bundles of joy to hug and those of you who will have soon, I feel admiration and hope    you never fail to smile, even though at times this smile may be a little under the surface - You have beaten the odds which should be congratulated every day    I know you will never take your babies for granted which will never fail to make you the wonderful mums or mums to be that you are    

I       that those of us still battling this journey will make it too     

Love MIFI XX


----------



## greatgazza

Mifi so sorry to hear that you went through so much and thank you so much for posting so frankly about it.

I too have been knocked for 6 (well 600 more like) by all this and was in a desperate state in January and wondered whether i should be hospitalised.  I managed to keep myself out of there as my sister was an inpatient many many years ago and it left some scars that make me question how much good it does.  I carried on seeing my weekly therapist privately and signed up for every course i could find at my local women's centre like self-esteem, assertiveness, stress management whilst i waited the 2 months for an urgent appointment with a shrink from the community mental health team or hospital!!  which part of urgent don't you quite understand! I actually said on the phone 'i could be dead by then'....

Anyhoo, i'm due for tx at reprofit on 26th of this month and am not sure how many more 'goes' at this i can manage so fingers crossed this will be the last time we have to go through this.

I'd be really interested to know how you found the hospital stay?  And whether you felt it really helped? Maybe this is not the place to post this and i should PM you but perhaps there are others out there struggling who would be interested to hear our experiences who it might help but i'm aware that i don't want to hijack this thread if it's stuff that others would rather not hear about.

Glad you're up to having another go.  This is a horrible rollercoaster that we don't want to be on but i know i can't throw in the towel until i know i've really given it a good go and then i'd have to get my head round another life path, hard though that would be.

GG xx


----------



## Mifi

Hi GG 

Sorry to hear that you have been struggling too    its just so hard isnt it     

Happy to share my experiences in hospital although im not sure if this is the right place to do it    I still sometimes think - I cant believe that happened to me    

I should be going to Reprofit about the 29th April so if you are still about perhaps we could meet for a decaf coffee?

Love MIFI x


----------



## greatgazza

Hi Mifi

Sadly i think we'll miss each other in Brno.  I'm only there 1 night as having DFET.  I arrive on monday 25th, have tx on tues 26th then fly home that evening.  

Just curious, have you ever had any immune testing done?  Level 1s or level 2s or  Karyotyping etc?  Any investigations at all as to why things may not have worked up until now?

I can totally understand the 'i can't believe it happened to me' sentiment but it can happen to anyone, and at anytime, but it is a shock when you feel like a shadow of the person you used to be or look back on yourself and your life and think 'that was a different person'...  i'm sure, aside from our experiences, which for many may be extreme, this whole journey changes people irrevocably and it is a f**king tough journey, especially for us singlies, and one which many many people will never even come close to having to experience.

but we'll get there!!  ironically i use the phrase 'baby steps' quite a lot...but i think it's a really good phrase (i've been helping out at a homeless hostel for a couple of weeks and talking to a severely depressed guy which is also helping me) but i keep using that phrase.

GG xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Mifi and GG           for this cycle.


And thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
I know I hit rock bottom after my own little eggies failed me - I'm so grateful to my supportive GP who recognised straight away that I needed additional support.  I'm one of those who on the outside will act as though everything's fine - but in reality ... its far from it.


Take very good care of yourselves big big hugs Mini x x


----------



## Teela

Mifi and GG      for your next treatment x

Mifi how long you out there for? I have remembered who you were before   now   . I was a bit slow on the uptake!

Teela
x


----------



## Mifi

Hi Teela   

I will be in Brno for about 10 days I think. Stepan wants me there from day 10    glad you realised who I was. Very annoying I had to change my name anyhow     

Mini thanks so much for the      

Love MIFI xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

mifi -   
infertility is a terrible thing which brings even the strongest of us to our knees    
I'm fortunate enough not to have needed hospitalisation, but I could not have got through the past 3 years without both professional help from a counsellor and the unwavering support of family, friends and FF   

Thank you for being so open about your experiences, it can only benefit others struggling with the same feelings and I am so very glad you got lots of help and that you are able to move forwards again now

Wishing you the very very best of luck for your upcoming tx - Reprofit is a great clinic and hopefully this will be the one which works for you 

Don't be afraid of going abroad, it's very easy at Reprofit and there are so many others who have been before (myself included) who can help. Make sure you join the Reprofit thread for the month you are going, there's sure to be someone else to meet up with, especially as you are there for a few days. And please ask if any questions (PM me if you prefer)...

  

Suitcase
x


----------



## Teela

Mifi I hope this is your time hun, I will be out in Brno again prob 8/9 May so prob miss u! I will keep in touch
as my dates could change as AF not here yet! You never know we may be able to meet up for a decaff hey   

Teela
x


----------



## Mifi

Suity thanks so much for your message - I do forget sometimes just how much us singlies have to go through with tx    burying it and deneying it as I was ashamed I wasnt coping anymore     but in fact now I can see just how strong and brave we are    I know your journey has been far from smooth    

Hope you and your LOs are well   

Teela AF is quite often late for me so we may get that decaf together after all   

Love MIfi xxX


----------



## Maisie3

Hi

Can I jump in - sorrry always seems a bit rude but you have to start somewhere   ...........I'm planning on cycling ASAP - but big question which clinic - Lister looks good and was planning on going there for my last cycle with ex so in a way makes sense - any other clinics that have good success rates for over 40's - would love to go to ARGC as my last 5 cycles were there - is there any chance they would their stats for over 40's are amazing..........however I hear they don't take singlies.........

So which are the top clinics in the UK for over 40's and which are the best ones abroad - Reprofit sounds good.

Also I'm not divorced till 5th May Nisi then 6 weeks after absolute - is it a nightmare to get around this legally.........  

Lister looks way expensive though.......   - I reckon about £10,000 without immunes...................DSIUI looks pointless am I right - the stats look really low - actually correction 0..............

Thanks alot look forward to catching up with you all - as you can see I've loads of questions but stupidly (I should know better shouldn't I!!) very excited.

Maisie
xxx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

Maisie,

Hello, welcome   
Just a quick reply, am sure others will be along soon to help more
re ARGC, they do not treat singles. I suspect that legally they probably aren't allowed to discriminate in this way but by the time you have challenged them on this it may well be too late for you anyway...
Lister does have a good reputation for older ladies, I'm not sure where else, but I believe the Care clinics in the UK are good. 
Reprofit is popular overseas, Serum Athens also - although both tend to be partic popular for donor eggs rather than OE IVF

The stats for over 40s are low...so you have to be prepared for multiple attempts, but everyone is different - my own eggs failed me at 38, but plenty of women in their early 40s do succeed...is impossible to give odds for an individual, although clinics will tell you yours are prob less than 5% based on your age 
Sometimes with older women IUI or natural IVF is more successful than full IVF...

re the divorce situation - am pretty sure you will need to wait until you are divorced to start tx, or ensure you have something in writing from your ex stating that you are going it alone and he is not part of your tx - but check with Natalie in the ask a lawyer section to be sure

best of luck
Suitcase
x


----------



## Teela

Hi Maisie3,

Welcome, I cannot comment on all the clinics as only been to a couple and it depends on if you want to cycle in the UK [Cost cost cost!!] or abroad. I have cycled at Care and found there costs very good compared to some of the London based clinics, and I liked it there which counts for a lot I think  I didn't think stats were that great for us over 40's period, however there are always [and there are many] exceptions to that rule, however I am one of those that keeps the stats low  as not been successful with OE.

Yes Reprofit is another great clinic and I have been there, price wise its a no brainer! also its a lovely clinic with lovely staff. I think there are other good clinics abroad ie Greece/Cypruz/Spain i am sure other ladies may be able to comment on those. Re DIU the stats are very low, however again ladies have got pregnant converting from IVF back to IUI. 
I don't want to sound depressing but be prepared for the long haul, I started out over two years ago thinking I just needed sperm  yeah right if only it was that easy, but as I have seen on this site, never say never some are lucky, I am not one of them  I hope you are hun  Any more questions ask away

Teela
x


----------



## sweet1

All the best for your upcoming tx Teela, Mifi and GG, and Maisie. You ladies have been through so much and have shown unbelievable strength and resourcefulness. I truly hope the next tx is the one that works for you.


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Maisie I would say that the Lister, CRGH or Care in Notts are the next ebst thing to ARGC.  The LIster have a v good track record of older women.  I did some cycles at ARGC and then went to the Lister and I think that their prices are slightly cheaper than ARGC but overall budget for £10K ish- some of the other ladies have cycled at the Lister so will be able to assist.

ARGC might take you back as a former pt, it might be worth ringing and asking to speak to Ellie and explain your circumstance.

Good Luck


----------



## cocochanel1

Does anyone else question whether they would actually like a man in their life/marriage or is it just me? I always thought I wanted to get married and for the first time in my life I'm seriously wondering if this has been based on false logic and that actually there are lots of advantages to being single. 

Am I mad or do others think this way also? Coco xxx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi
What a great topic Coco.
I frequently think I am completely sane being single and having tx especially when I read of other "couples in a relationship" and the complications they have.
However, still would like someone special to come into my life, you know to share the good times with and when things just seem crap and things that happen that make it even crapper, to know that someone else is rooting for things to go my way. This is after a catalogue of upsets e.g bereavement, mum being ill, disciplinary etc etc. I don't want to settle for second best but a little romance and loving would be nice.
Have a male friend who is looking at "settling with girlfriend" as he wants kids and thinks nothing better will come along and do salute all of us on this journey who aren't prepared to just take what's on offer rather than hope to meet the right guy.
xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

coco - I've never been that fussed about marriage per se (I'm not particularly religious so no dreams of big church wedding and at the end of the day if you are committed to someone a marriage cert seems almost irrelevant to me) but I do think, like fraggles, that I'd like someone to share the highs and lows with, someone who puts me/the children first
when I used to travel with business I used to envy colleagues who always had someone to call when they arrived somewhere, just to check in and let them know all was ok...it made me feel very alone    perhaps a silly example but for me it's always summed up the bad parts about being single - that there's no one person waiting for my call...

that said, I'm pretty set in my ways, I like my independence and not having to compromise or worry about someone else (apart from the twins of course!) and I think I'd find it pretty tough to be in a relationship after a long time of being single...and now I have the twins I k know I'd find it partic hard to let someone else into our little 'threesome', and especially to let someone else potentially share the decisions around how they are raised...

so it's a tricky one...I can't imagine going out dating for quite some time yet, but if someone just happened to cross my path I guess I'd have to see how things went...but chances of someone crossing my path are pretty slim at the moment - not least because I rarely manage to leave the house between feeds, changes, naps etc    

interesting topic though, be good to see what others think
Suitcase
x


----------



## GIAToo

Hmmmm - well since I've got pregnant this time I have dreamt a lot about my exes and I want to watch films with men I fancy in - however, when I think abut the reality of being in a relationship, I just can't be bothered!!    I feel sad at the thought of never having another relationship, but I also think about my two Grandmothers - paternal Grandmother was beaten every week by my Grandad, he left her with 6 kids when she was in her 40s (he ran off with the neighbour's wife) and she never even looked at another man for the rest of her life.  I don't honestly know if she was happy, but she survived.  Madly enough she was still devastated when my Grandad died and she hadn't seen him for 20 years!!
As for my maternal Grandmother, she was married for 55 years and my Grandad drove her nuts!!   He was also not a nice husband.

Not really sure what I'm trying to say here, but I think I mean that for centuries women  have survived perfectly well without men in their lives.

Ultimately I would like a man in my life, but I'm not very good at choosing the right men and/or how to "do" relationships!  Looking at the above, I haven't really had many good examples set for me in my life    

GIA Tooxxx


----------



## ameliacooper

Very interesting topic Coco  

like the other girls I would really like a man around - despite not actively looking  

it would just make life on the practical side so much easier, more money, more time to go to the gym/see friends!  And I find it a burden having to make all major decisions on my own.  I would love someone opinion on schools etc who cares as much as me.  And also the question of having another one   as I've always said Im not going to do it on my own again 

re the emotional stuff - yes I do miss intimacy and someone being there for me.  But I cannot imagine sharing my bed or my home or even my children for that matter.

It's been too long for me too


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

cocochanel1 said:


> Does anyone else question whether they would actually like a man in their life/marriage or is it just me? I always thought I wanted to get married and for the first time in my life I'm seriously wondering if this has been based on false logic and that actually there are lots of advantages to being single.
> 
> Am I mad or do others think this way also? Coco xxx


Coco - interesiting topic, sometimes I would like someone to share times with, but not necessarily married, but I think that I might be too set in my ways now! and independence. Then sometimes I read the relationship thread and realise just how lucky we are not to have a DH/DP with their controlling ways and bad behaviour.

L x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

...and despite everything I said in post above (about potentially not wanting to share childcare/rearing decisions), when I watch my nieces and nephew with their dad, and how much they love being with him, I do wish I could offer my boys the same relationship with a 'dad' - it _is_ different to what mums/one parent can offer and I occasionally feel sad for my boys in that respect...not that I would enter into a relationship just to give them a father, but it would certainly be a big factor

Suitcase
x


----------



## cocochanel1

It's an interesting topic isn't it. Completely agree Suity; I worry everyday about my children never having the kind of relationship with a father that I do with my own father. I love him so much and he helps & supports me so much. But then I think everyone's life is different and my children will have things that I didn't have and different relationships and actually I'm not sure you miss what you have never had. As you know I also have a 7 year old and I think even if I met someone now it would be very hard for him to accept him into our unit. I think at the baby stage it would be ok, even at the toddler stage but by 7 I think they are quite formed as people and I'm really not sure how it would work. 
Like many of you have said Diesy (where did your post go?), Fraggles, JJ1, Giatoo, AmeliaC it would be lovely to have someone to share the highs and lows with and thats what I had until 7 years ago and at that point I couldn't imagine life as a single person but now that I've done it for 7 years I worry that it would be a huge adjustment to set up home with someone and how would it work with two children? Suity, I completely get the wishing that someone was waiting for you to call in. I guess my Mother is that person for me but it would be nice to have a partner but then I remind myself about all the possible downsides having had a really crap relationship and also having seen so many of my friends in not so great relationships with not so great men. I just don't know but then I start worrying I must be odd for thinking this way when the whole world seems to be married?!?!?  It's so great to have you guys to remind me that I am not alone!

Coco xx


----------



## lulumead

Good topic....is it wrong to just want one to put the bins out and have some    with     


Other than that I think things are pretty ok single...although I do feel sad that my baby when he comes along, won't have a lovely dad around and would love to be able to give him that.  


xx


----------



## GIAToo

lulumead said:


> Good topic....is it wrong to just want one to put the bins out and have some  with


You are a girl after my own heart!!
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## indekiwi

Coco, have to say I'm not really bothered one way or the other for 95% of the time.  Like GIA2, there are a number of examples in my family of very unhappy relationships...and that's before I turn the microscope on my own unsuccessful efforts on the relationship front.  I've done the big wedding stuff so I guess I've got that T-shirt - and the divorce party was a lot more fun as it happens.  I've also been in a relationship since having poppet so know that choosing to conceive my family through donor conception doesn't mean the end of any hopes of having a partner.  I miss the   side of things, would appreciate the practical help that many (but far from all) partners often provide (ooooooh, for a sleep in!) and occasionally feel sad that my kids don't have a father.  On that latter point, my father was missing for large chunks of my life (I got to know him once I reached adulthood), and like you said, I didn't miss what I never had, so wonder just how much my kids will actually miss out on. Honestly, for the most part I actively enjoy the benefits of being single.  

A-Mx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

I think as well that we are not alone in contemplating this - my good friend lost her DH to cancer 2 days after their wedding when their baby was 5 months old, of course this is not what they had planned for their life together when they were TTC their DD - he didn't know that  he had cnacer and was dead 6 weeks after his diagnosis - cancer is so cruel and unpredictable. 

She also worries about what her DD  (now 10 months) will ask about her father, male role models in the child's life plus she has had to bring her up and deal with her own grief at the same time, sell up her home, give up her job as she is on mat leave still,  move across the country to be closer to her parents and learn to drive. I guess for us at least we have planned this from the start.

L x


----------



## caramac

Great topic Coco! Only recently I was reading some posts on here about people feeling sad/worried about contemplating single motherhood and I was feeling that I might be strange because it really never bothered me. I don't feel particularly sad that I've entered parenthood alone. I have been single for nearly 8 years now (with only one brief fling since then!) and really feel there isn't much I can't do alone. Only the other day I was wondering how on earth I'd fit another person's belongings into my house what with my stuff and now Jacob's!

Yes, sometimes it would be nice to have someone to give me a hug or cuddle with and feel loved by. And the money aspect would probably be the biggest bonus - shared house bills and hopefully he'd have a good job so we could move to a village sooner than I'll be able to by myself! And of course, like others have said, I feel sad that J will miss out on having a father in his life. But I do agree that you don't miss what you never had.

Life is definitely a lot simpler being single...I seem to spend my relationships in a state of insecurity wondering whether they love me, etc. and hate the fact that at the drop of a hat they can decide it's over and completely pull the rug out from underneath you! I am so pleased that motherhood is the opposite - unconditional love and someone who will never leave you by choice!


----------



## Maya7

Before J came into my life I explored relationships that might give me what I wanted out of life ... The closest I got was one that was almost everything I wanted ... but would never have a child in it so the 'almost' just wasnt good enough... I decided that I wouldnt even look again until J was at least 5.  Now that hes almost 2 I'm rethinking... I cant imagine even wanting to look anymore but maybe this will change.  Any man coming in to this family now has the bar set so high he'd have to have 6 foot long legs to get in...   

 
Maya


----------



## LoubyLou42

golly lots of interesting talk going on here.

Firstly Maisy, re clinics in UK - my last round was with Lister and as you can see they finally got the result I was looking for (fingers crossed all continues to go well - 20 week scan on 20th May).  I cannot recommend them enough but there will be as many people who they couldn't help I'm sure.  If you want to DM me about them please do so - happy to help.

Just to jump on the band wagon about having that someone special - I think it comes down to have the RIGHT someone special.  Have met up with my ex over the last couple of days and it's been really weird.  Having not seen him for 2 years I wondered how I was going to feel - we still live near each other and I wanted to tell him about my current 'state' before bumping into him in a public place and him thinking I'd put on an 'awful lot of weight'.  He was thrilled for me and really sweet, but I kept on getting glimpses of the side of him I didn't like and thanked my lucky stars I got out when I could.  Then this evening I was looking up baby names on line and thinking how nice it would be to  chat this through with someones..... probably end up disagreeing and getting no where.... but it's about sharing isn't it.  It's so important to share this journey with friends and make them part of it.... good friends wont let you down and I hope mine are there for the long run because I'm going to be asking alot of them over the coming months.. years.  But if I do meet the RIGHT man, I certainly wont be letting him go.  

Happy hunting everyone!

LoubyLou
xxx


----------



## lulumead

Hi JJ1:


Did you have another consult about surrogacy this weekend?  I think I read that somewhere!
Hope it went well, and a way forward is becoming clear.


xxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

JJ1 - echo what Lulu said ... hope it went well and things are starting to move forward.


Take care 


Mini x x


----------



## Mifi

JJ1 hope your meeting went well      about time you had some better news      

Love Mifi xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks ladies the appt gave us much food for thought, it sounds like it is doable but vvv expensive, and of course no guarantee, you have to choose an egg donor (she can charge anything up to $25000, then a cycle of IVF at a US clinic on top- no guarantee of eggs or back donor if anything goes wrong and if she is a poor responder or you need to go again then you have to pay her again! The the surrogate's fee and treatment, and then the care for the baby and then living in the USA for around 6 weks
So I am looking at $100K or more- so lots of thinking.

L x


----------



## bingbong

wow JJ, that is expensive! I seem to remember hearing something about babies born to surrogates in America not being given automatic entry to live in UK, could be nothing but best to check it out. I really hope that you can work something out and get your dream   

bingbong x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

yes it is complicated as the baby gets a US passport not british, you get a pre brith order from the court, then they enter the UK on a visitors visa and then apply for a uk one on return

l


----------



## bingbong

It does mean that you'd be able to live in America too, although they are looking at possibly changing that. Really hope that it works out for you if you decide to go for it   

bingbong x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

JJ - can't believe how expensive it would be
hope you can find a solution one way or another
Suitcase
x


----------



## morrigan

ouch JJ expensive- but at least you know its possible. I hope the answer appears shortly.


----------



## Lou-Ann

Wow! that is expensive JJ   . I hope that it works for you if you decide to go for it   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## lulumead

crikey that is expensive. I'm sure you've looked into other countries so assume its not possible elsewhere? at least it does offer a way forward  - good luck with your thinking.
xx


----------



## greatgazza

Flippin' eck tucker on the price.  I so so hope you find a way forward JJ that is right for you.  I wish you so much luck with making a decision.

GG x


----------



## Candee

Hi everyone!
JJ1 that is a lot of money. 
I am sure you have looked at other options, but it might be worth contacting Tertia at Nurture, a South African egg donor agency who also do surrogacy I think... Tertia was beyond brilliant to me when I was sorting out my donor treatment in SA. It was a lot cheaper than similar treatment in the UK and definitely the US. The website address is www.nurture.co.za
Just an idea... really hope everything works out for you hun       
Candee
x

/links


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Thanks so much for you kind wishes.

Candee I believe but will double check but the surrogacy door has closed for UK people, there is a lady on the surrogacy thread who had a v positive experience in SA but she is from SA and lived out there afterwards.  I definitey relook at it.

L x


----------



## caramac

Blimey JJ that sounds very expensive...but at least it gives you an option. I really hope you get your dream soon xx


----------



## greatgazza

JJ a host surrogate has just posted on the introductions board.  I can't remember all the minutiae of all your situation and whether that would be a possible option or not? I can't remember what the reason for you considering the US was?  And whether there was a particular reason you couldn't or weren't considering over here any more

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi JJ

Not sure of the practicalities of it for you and your donor and partner but I think you are all in the medical field - would it be a possibility to take a sabbatical from your current jobs perhaps and get nursing/ medical jobs in SA for a while to be able to explore the surrogacy route. I know one of my friends went into nursing so she had her choice of places to travel and live.

I know this is way out and just may not be possible but like the others if we can help come up with a plan for you .....

xxx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Hi fraggles, I'm on a fixed tern nhs contract so sabbatical is not an option, but my mum is frail, disabled & elderly so I couldn't really venture far away for long.working in sA for uk nurses is hard, and that was from a native SA. sA surrogacy means you gave to be domikciled there or SA. I think USA or uk
is our way forward. l x


----------



## greatgazza

jj did you see the post i put on the other thread?  about doron mamed-meged from that google baby programme?

GGx


----------



## Fraggles

JJ We all so want this for you. The UK or US it is then. xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

GG thanks for the link I hadn't actually seen your post on the other thread- I pop across to the other thread occasionally but can't keep up!
Fraggles thanks for the good wishes
L x


----------



## Candee

Oh JJ1 I know we all have everything crossed for you and so want it all to work out for you hun       
Candee
x


----------



## Diesy

Hi Everybody,

Hope everyone is feeling bright - gorgeous sunny day up here!  Wasn't quite sure where to put this so have stuck it here.  I have a wee problem that I need to get taken care of before I can proceed any further with my plans.  I'm posting to see if there is any way to speed up the NHS lol    I only wish that the clinic that did my fertility testing last year had been a little bit more than irreverent when they pointed out the fibroid that is big enough to stop me conceiving at all as well as promoting miscarriage.  

Any ideas where I can start to get things sorted?  I know that it used to be possible to pay for a private consult and then get the Monopoly 'straight to go' card within the NHS.  I'd heard they'd closed that loophole.  Sadly there is barely enough money in the pot for my planned fertility treatment never mind  to go private for the fibroid op.  I'm about loose my job and am probably out of options other than getting a shiny new for sale sign for the garden.  And if I'm going to do that I need to do it now in house selling season 

Thanks for reading  
Diesy   xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Diesy do to your GP and ask for a gynae referral asap, ay that you are getting pain ( I would have thought that you are) how it is effceting your life etc - they should give you an appt fairly swiftly- you and your GP together should have the info about where you want to be seen, and s/he should have the waiting times for the different gyanecologists at different centres- you can choose where to go, so it might be quicker to go a bit further afield.  good luck
L X


----------



## Diesy

Hi JJ 

I've been away camping trying to have a wee break.  Thanks so much for that!  Right, I'm going to my GP tomorrow!  I'll write out what you've said and try and get through it without too many tissues.  Really quite upset tonight so hopefully make some headway tomorrow with the GP.  

Diesy xx  

After that I'm going to rip some heads off at the clinic where I had my fertility screening done last year


----------



## Diesy

Hi JJ,

Thought I'd post you a wee update letting you know how it went today.  I saw another GP who is a bit more dynamic...also 8.5 months pg    She's sending me for a scan so that when I see the consultant they have the report already.  I didn't realise the other GP had mentioned the fertility treatment and that might have had an effect since I got home to an appointment from the hospital.  4th of August, good but still 4 weeks away.  Anyways, I got to ask lost of questions re recovery time.  GP also said she could refer me to another hospital to see if they are quicker.  

So, job well done, thanks for the advice.  Hope you are doing ok and getting a bit further ahead with the surrogacy side of things.
Diesy xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Diesy Glad the GP was supportive and hope that you get rid of those fibroids!
I think that there are threads about them on FF somewhere!
Lx


----------



## Diesy

Hey JJ - yup, thanks for the heads up, been on that thread too.  Make some more calls tomorrow.

Cheers luv xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Brilliant News Diesy - so glad your GP is being proactive! 
  


Mini x x


----------



## Diesy

Aw, cheers Mini  

Lots of calls tomorrow re scans, etc.

Diesy xxx


----------



## Diesy

Hello

I know there is hardly anyone posting these days but hopefully I'm not talking to an empty room  

I have my NHS appointment tomorrow and I'm hoping hoping hoping       the doc is going to say - yes! we can remove your fibroid and it's not getting in the way of little eggie's pitch for 9 months.  And, no we're not going to slice you right open, scare tissue, no none of that neither.  Please cross fingers for me, I couldn't be more devastated by the news I've had in the last few of weeks.

I had a bit of scary MRI today and on Friday I'm going back to the private doc who broke my heart a couple of weeks ago.  (Although I have to say he couldn't tell me where the blasted thing was or whether it was distorting the uterus so one has to wonder.)  

Please, I need some luck, I've lost so much in this life already  

Diesy    xx


----------



## greatgazza

Awww deisy, sorry to hear you're feeling so sad and scared.  I really hope you have some good and positive news at your appt tomorrow and with your private doc on Friday.  Hang in there, moment by moment is bearable     

GGx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Aww Diesy, big    hun. Sorry to hear that you had a scary time today. I hope that you get good news tomorrow and on Friday   .

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Diesy

Thanks Lou-Ann & GG!

I hope you are both doing well      I'm in such a state I started the process for adoption on Monday.  It's been an increasingly horrid five weeks.

But I am bolstered with you good wishes    I'll feedback.  I meeting a fellow FF-er tomorrow, afterwards, so hopefully I'm not going to weep all over her!

Thanks again  
Diesy


----------



## greatgazza

If you need to weep love, weep away, i'm sure she'll understand.   

How did the consultant break your heart?  Was it telling you about the fibroid? Or did you have some other bad news?  

GGx


----------



## Diesy

I'm like   every five mins at the mo!

Well, he said I was too old for kids and that usually on a women my age they'd just whip the uterus out.  He said he'd never had to do a hysterectomy for a fibroid removal but I found him less than positive.  He wouldn't discuss my fertility in relation to the fibroid at all.  I came out numb.  He wanted to open me right up, no talk of going up the way, even though he couldn't tell me exactly where it was.  I know it's at the back of the uterus...I'm hoping that's like the back of the cupboard where you keep stuff you don't need to use.  I've been beside myself for weeks.  And none of my family have even phoned and when I see them they don't ask.  I told my sis it felt like my life was over and her answer was that I had a lovely personality, a nice flat...and the dog!

That doc might be fantastic at what he does, I don't mean to slate him but, come on, I was half way through fertility tx, I kinda need my uterus for that!

The MRI was a little scary because she did my abdomen as well.  Just hoping she didn't see more bad news.  

Hoping for good news from the NHS guy tomorrow, if there isn't more bad news I'll see a London specialist too.  It's 8k for his op and I'm loosing my job in the next couple of months, although my current job wouldn't pay for that anyway.

Hope you are keeping well 
Diesy xx


----------



## greatgazza

Well i can't believe he spoke to you like that!! Get a second opinion love!  "too old for kids"  what utter rot!!!  tons on here older than you!! "whip the uterus out" more codswallop!! it really isn't something they do that lightly at all, my sister, who is way older than you, had to practically bleed to death from endo and fibroids before they'd take hers out!  wouldn't discuss your fertility in relation to the fibroid? what kind of consultant was he? it all sounds a bit strange to me i have to say, with only half the information you need.

it sounds like he has totally panicked you before he himself really knows what's going on.  was the MRI ordered by him? what's the NHS doc appt about? obviously you don't know what the true situation is yet but there are tons of women on here who have fibroids and it's certainly not the end of their fertility journey.  i can't believe he has left you in this panicked state without even having all the tests and investigations done, that's really bad form and could have been for nothing    

sorry your family haven't been there like you would have liked.  it's a tough one that.  sometimes people really don't know what to say and so stay away when really we'd be happy for them to say nothing but still be there.  

try and hold on to a bit of hope as you don't know it's all bad news yet.  what op is 8k? the fibroid removal? that should be something you can get on the NHS, obviously will be a wait but if money is tight it's still an option.

GGxx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi Diesy

Sorry you had such a jerk as a consultant.

Perhaps someone who works for the nhs can confirm, but I am pretty sure that you can ask what the waiting lists for treatment/appointments are for different hospitals and then pick which you would go to so if you did go nhs you might not have to wait for donkey years.

xx


----------



## lulumead

Big     Diesy...sounds like you are having a horrible time. Hope you get some better news soon.
xxx


----------



## sweet1

Diesy - big   for going through such a horrible time at the mo.


----------



## smilingandwishing

Hello Ladies,

I hope you are all well.

Deisey!! The ruddy consultant has made me mad!  Please get a second opinion. I had four fibroids before I got pregnant with J.  They were all on the outer section of the uterus, but because one was close to the opeining of the cervix I just had to have a scan at 36 weeks to ensure that it wasn't going to obstruct a natural birth.

Fibroids are so different for different women, it is not a done deal that it means you cannot conceive. 

Sending you hugs!

Smiling xx


----------



## kizzi79

Diesy - I agree with all the above - that consultant is in need of a good slap    - really hope you have some better news coming your way - take care honey   , love Krissi x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - sweet pea - have my fingers and toes and anything else I can cross ... crossed      


Thinking of you - and don't take any rubbish from the horrible consultant man!!!  


      


Mini xxx


----------



## indekiwi

Diesy,         


What a     you've just to put up with.  Can't believe you've been treated so dreadfully.  Please please please seek a second opinion.  


As for your family, well, I just despair.    


Feeling for you,


A-Mx


----------



## Diesy

Hello 

Thanks so much for all the messages!!!  It's all just been getting worse over the last five weeks.  At first I was worried about time scales and getting back to IVF before the end of the year.  But now I just want the least invasive treatment to give me the best chance for future pregnancies. 

I had to request my own MRI when he couldn't tell me enough after an ultrasound.  They keep telling me the he can only release my results if he chooses, although it's my insurance that covers the tests.  My second opinion is tomorrow, I wish I had the MRI results for that.  Even my GP, who explained he wasn't an expert, wasn't hopeful of my chances of conception after it was removed.

The 8k op is keyhole with a London fertility expert, I think I will have a consult with him or someone similar at least.  I'll see how things go tomorrow.  I'm going to wear my glasses and my lecturing stroppy upstarts face.  (The same for Friday with the first consultant   )  

I am upset my family don't seem to be taking this seriously, even when they know how upset I am.  I feel better with you all behind me!!!   Hope I come back with better news and the MRI didn't pick up anything else.  I hope everyone is doing well.

  
Diesy xx

PS  The fertility clinic I was using knew about the fibroid last year but neglected to mention it was an issue until they tried to get money out of my for a catheter check, £200.  Despite fertility scanning and two more scans I only know this was a problem when they started talking about the possibility of being unable to get the catheter in for IUI/IVF.  I wish they'd flagged it before I spent non-refundable cash on swimmers, transport etc.


----------



## Onthego69

Hi Deisy 

I hope you get a more sypathetic and supportive consultant this afternoon and you are not treated in the same way as before.  

It is shocking what they think they can get away with  

All the best for today        

Looking forward to catch-up later  

M xx


----------



## Sima

Hi Disey

I'm so sorry to hear you are having trouble with your fibroid.  I can sympathise as I too have fibroids.  I agree with the others and think it is good to get a second opinion as each consultant seems to have a different view as to how to manage the little buggers.

I would definitely try to get hold of all results and scans since there is no point in replicating them if you have had them done already.  Some doctors are funny about releasing information but I think they have no choice if you insist as the under the freedom of information act you have a right to see what information is kept on a database about you.  The doctor might charge you a fee for this info but they certainly should not deny you.  Put something in writing and then ask again.

I too had a strange incident a couple of years ago when I had my IVF.  The medical staff knew I had fibroids from the very start but they did not think it would prevent me from getting pregnant.  What they failed to tell me was that my fibroids were in the way of my ovaries which then made egg collection virtually impossible.  They still charged me the full whack despite the fact that they must have had this knowledge before going to EC.
Can you PM me the details of your London private doc.  I have just been let down by my NHS consultant.  I had a hysteroscopy back in March but my fibroids are still there.  My consultant has now discharged me saying I need to go and see a fertility specialist about my fibroids because he would only carry on with my case if it was to manage heavy bleeding (which I do have as well).  I sometimes think doctors just want to have an easy life with easy patients.

You are not old luvvie I think it is just that some of these consultants are still acting as though we are in the 1950s.

Keep us posted as to how you get on.

Sima


----------



## Lou-Ann

Diesy    . I cannot believe that the consultant said that to you   . I agree that you should get a second opinion. I hope that you have had a better response from you appt today   .

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Fraggles

Diesy

Have you ever spoken or email Penny at Serum, she is fantastic. She may tell you the same thing but the Serum thread think she is a legend and I really rate her. She is on holiday usually in August but still checks her emails.

I am sure she works with experts who remove fibroids too and they are good. If you want another option try asking there.

Hope you get the answers you want and today was better.

xxx


----------



## Diesy

Hello 

Aw, thanks for all the messages and PM's - you wouldn't believe how much they cheered me up!!!        Thanks for the shoulder and dinner last night Misha 

It's really good to hear about other peoples experiences, Smiling, great to hear your wonderful success story of your lovely J   

Thanks for your insight Sima, sometimes I really wonder about the ethics of fertility clinics.  I think you just have to keep pushing them, as opposed to blindly trusting which I favour.  I hope they sort you out!  PM on it's way.

Fraggles, thanks for the tip re Penny at Serum.  I'll get an email off to her once I've stopped processing the info I got yesterday.

And yes, you were all right about the scary private consultant    I am so glad I didn't sign up with him after what the NHS said yesterday.

So...it's mixed news.  The NHS say leave it alone.  They STILL can't tell me if it is distorting the uterus which is the important thing.  I tend to think it is because of my monthlies.  It's in the wall of the uterus so there is a higher risk of emergency hysterectomy if they did try to remove it.  Because it's in the wall there is a risk of the uterus not growing with the baby, second trimester miscarriage higher risk.  I'm hoping because it's at the back this won't be a big an issue but what do I know  

I so appreciate y'all pitching in and I know you've all been in the wars with trying to get pg as a singley.  It's never an easy trip.  Conversely I'm starting to get excited about getting back on the cookie trail    Who knows how this will turn out but I was thinking I would have a go before they attempted surgery if that was on the cards.

Aw, big   to you all and lots of these      

Diesy xxxxx

PS  I came home to a message from my Dad, who only knows I'm upset, something is wrong and I've had an MRI.  He rang to tell me the tax disc for my car had arrived lol.  At least I know what to expect form them and I have FF friends to keep me going


----------



## morrigan

Big hugs Diesy- I would echo what what Fraggles said about Serum- Can't vouch in person bu Ive heard loads of storys of people having hysteroscopy with Penny and finding and fixing problems they didn't know they had despite numerous procedures elsewhere- also probably cheaper in long run. Definietly worth posting on Serum boards for advice from others.


----------



## Damelottie

Diesy


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Damelottie your ant is creepy!!! lol Alfie is getting so big in his pics.  Is Lottie still around?


----------



## Damelottie

JJ1 - So many people keep swatting the ant    . Alfie is growing so fast its quite scary   . Hopefully you will get to meet him one day. Yes, Lottie is still here   . They still have a very love/not sure relationship     

How are you? How are the boys?

xxx


----------



## Diesy

Thanks Morrigan and Dame Lottie  

I hope everyone's ok with all this trouble in London etc.  I'm really shocked at the level of violence and destruction, as are my friends up here.  

I'm going to email Serum now.  There has been an attempt at chaotic relaxing here since my last post!  I am actually really looking forward to going ahead with tx now.  Who knows, blind optimism on my part  

I tried to get another test (tubes)  done with the private consultant but he is hell bent on operating and has refused to do anything else.  I think he's sussed me out as one of those strange individuals who doesn't like potentially unnecessary surgery that could result in an emergency hysterectomy.  Funny old me, eh!  My MRI came back, 4.5cm.  

Just a quick question - do any of you think my fertility clinic where I had my screening done should have drawn more serious attention to this?  I had a scan and my AMH done.  Nothing is mentioned in my paperwork and the nurse said - oh you have a fibroid a bit like you'd say - oh you have a uterus.

Just wondering.  Thanks again for everyone's support!!!  I'm away off to post on the IVF thread.

Diesy xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - I would bring it to their attention - I was livid with the way they told me my AMH was 0.0 and IVF was *NOT* an option. It was a call from the nurse - who just said your results are .. blah blah blah and you can't have IVF - OK?? ... Charming!!! What on earth did I pay £200 for??

I just got an apology from consultant and they used it as a case study to 'imporve' their service. I would state your concerns honey.

   

Mini x


----------



## Fraggles

Hi Diesy

You know I would really trust whatever Penny says as I think her heart is in the right place (rather nice for people who work in this business) and she is passionate about doing what it takes for any of her clients to get their BFP. I think she would suggest surgery if she thought it was necessary but I saw her for my first tx and she chose to do natural iui which I think says a lot about her and I liked that she didn't go for pumping me full of drugs as a first resort.

I really hope she can give you some hope and faith back in this business.

Lots of love

xxx


----------



## morrigan

Dont like to be political but Is anyone else angry with prime ministers comments that riots were caused by too many fatherless family's !! What an idiot no wander country's in the state it's in !


----------



## Fraggles

Does this express how I feel about the idiotic comments. Is he telling me that all two parent families = great parenting I think not. I should also add working for public sector it irritates the hell out of me how any mp dare criticise teachers, police or any public sector workers as are they forgetting us front line workers are only implementing policies and procedures that those idiots tell us to implement with their guidelines.

Grrrrrr let me at them.

xxx


----------



## indekiwi

Re comments from DC, yes, Furious of Gloucestershire here!!!       

Nothing like a sweeping stereotype about a minority group is there....it's okay though, since he's not having a go at a given ethnic or a socio-economic community....can't tell you how p'd off I am about it.  How am I supposed to bring up children who are proud of who they are and their family when some unthinking   spouts off like that - talk about taking responsibility for the way one behaves - wish he'd practice what he preaches!

A-Mx


----------



## caramac

I didn't hear him say that (don't watch the news much) but it's a bit of a stupid statement to make. Surely children who suffer from bad parenting are to blame (whether that be single parenting or traditional parenting). It's not the family make up that determines how the child turns out it's HOW they are parented. But I guess it's just easier to blame single parents because I guess that many of the disadvantaged come from broken homes (which would be a better term to use, rather than fatherless homes).


----------



## bingbong

I have lost count of how many times I've heard people on the news discussing the riots and talking about how many came from one parent homes     . But for DC to make a comment like that is terrible and will just increase predjudice.

bingbong x


----------



## GIAToo

DC also said in 2007 that single mothers were to blame for Global Warming!!!!  Due to the fact that there were less adults in one household sharing the heating etc!    
Idiot!
GIA Tooxx


----------



## upsydaisy

As a single parent AND a teacher I find myself solely responsible for aforementioned riots, oh the shame   .


He repeated the 'fatherless children' comments a number of times in the speech     .  I'd better keep E away from the petrol in future.  I've worked in some of the areas affected and the issues are sooooooooo much more complicated than he'll ever figure out   
Upsyxxx


----------



## Fraggles

I think our LO's are the least of DC's worries he should be worried about us single parents at the next riot!
I liked the comment of the partner of a woman who was imprisoned as she has two children and handled stolen goods. Partner asked what had happened to societies morals imprisoning her when she has two children. Well I might ask perhaps she should have thought about that before she got involved. 
xx


----------



## morrigan

I also how he's talking about solving gang culture as it was the least like gang culture that's been seen in years - none if then where fighting each other ! All predijice is awful but you don't hear of too many single rights activists - some how that's ok !


----------



## sweet1

haven't heard the fatherless comments but remarks like this just add fuel to the fires of prejudice people like my idiot brother...grrrr! Some 2 parent families have terrible or abusive fathers, he should think before he opens his big mouth!


----------



## Tommi

DC went to Eton... so he was effectively parented by teachers. Perhaps he should quit with the stupid comments now!


----------



## Candee

I wish he would just quit completely, right now


----------



## Diesy

I can confirm I have found Scameron a drinking partner!  It's the last NHS consultant I saw as a private patient.  As soon as he knew I was aiming towards singleton motherhood he refused to treat me and called anyone that would an a*******  See another couple of his gems below.

Average AMH for a 40 year old = 19
The desire to have a child is desperate and that makes a woman vulnerable.
Fibroids don't cause infertility or miscarriage...ever.
You will have a Downs baby.

I should have asked him about The Tooth Fairy and Santa!

Just to stress me out further...is there any reason that one shouldn't go for private medical care when the NHS won't treat a medical problem?  (Instead giving the thumbs up for thousands of £s in fertility treatment with little chance of working.)  I don't have it in me to face months of fighting and tests for an operation which I would be on a list for already if I just had a partner      Also I don't have time!  Just wondered if anyone had any thoughts 

 to all,
Diesy    xx


----------



## Tommi

Diesy, men like this shouldn't be allowed in the job!    In my field of work I could not refuse to work with anyone. I cannot understand how they get away with it in the medical profession. The big problem around fertility treatment is that the ethical foundations underpinning the guidelines are totally screwed. They wouldn't pass a basic undergraduate ethics course, seriously! The more you look into it from an academic perspective the more shaky it all seems. Thankfully there are ethicists around (there's a great woman, former Princeton professor, who has interesting things to say and a few female ethicists over here too) but it will take time for their ideas to filter through and be accepted in what is a mostly male dominated, pretty conservative, white, anglo-catholic profession. 

I would love to know where he has found all these women with an amh of 19 at 40! Clearly he hasn't done his research (he'd get laughed out of the country if he said that in the USA!). The counsellor I saw at my clinic told me that if I tried to use my own eggs at my age I wouldn't know "what" I was conceiving... the implication being that my baby would definitely have some major difficulty. The first consultant I was referred to refused to see me - he only sees married, heterosexual couples. What can I say? It's as if the medical profession missed out on the maturing that other sectors of society have been through over the past 50 years. 

In this age of patient choice, I would say keep on changing your doctor until you find one that is clued up and supportive. They do exist! I have a great GP and gynaecologist who were nothing but supportive when I first started talking to them about my plans. Doctors most certainly don't know everything (I've had two scans recently by two different consultants and they cannot agree on which way my uterus tips! Unless it's flip-flapping around in there, only one of them can be right!   ) and their grasp of basic ethics is often flawed. Sounds highly critical, I know, but this is all highlighted so clearly when it comes to seeking fertility treatment. It's only a matter of time before some of these decisions are challenged through the courts (e.g. my PCT used to refuse fertility treatment to a couple if the man had children from a previous relationship - it's a way of rationing treatment...). In the meantime, move on. Find someone who has done their ethics homework and who is in the job for the right reasons. 

Sorry about the rant!   Good luck


----------



## morrigan

That's horrendous diesy - i hope you asked for your money back - I'm angry on your behalf and it's reminded me why I chose to be treated abroad !!


----------



## smilingandwishing

Deisy - Am so annoyed by that poor excuse of a doctor!  How dare he judge you rather than treat you.  I'm not sure what the deal with fibroids is for you, but I had four fibriods and still got pregnant and had J, so it is possible - depends whre the fibroids are. Inbox me if you want to know more.

Smiling xx


----------



## Mifi

Deisy       what an insensitive     I had a nasty experience with a doctor and his lack of manners, appalling attitude and insensitivity. I reported him to the General Medical Council. It didnt come to anything in the end but it sure made me feel better. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall and seen his face when he opened the letter to say a patient had made a complaint about him!


----------



## Lou-Ann

Deisy     . I cannot believe what this consultant has said to you    and that he has refused to treat you   . As the others have said, I think that you should look for a more supportive one soon   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Diesy

Thank you so much for all your lovely supportive replies. Been quite stressed so forgive tardy response!    I have really appreciated the input...eek I feel really guilty now!

Update following super sloothing
Dr 1 - slapdash so instincts good to avoid. (private through health plan)
Dr 2 - conservative re surgery but would much rather I flush IVF money down the loo or miscarry.  (nhs)
Dr 4 (nutjob) - religious and doesn't agree with single women...probably in any capacity.  Will be complaining to medical council, thanks for that tip Mifi. (private through health plan/nhs)

Good news is I'm booked in with a highly skilled and reputable surgeon for next week.  Just can't hang around for the NHS to become less bigoted.  Which leads me to bad news of how to cover this huge cost...  No wonder I am sleep walking!

I'm now eating a lovely pink cake and fretting a bit.   to all!!!  You're all amazing  Diesy xx


----------



## Sima

Diesy - Excellent news broid buddy.  Good luck for next week.  Keep us posted.


----------



## Diesy

Thanks Sima, glad your home again!  My briod is a wimp compared to yours.  And we certainly need to take a   to them.  All for one and one for all!  Take care xx

PS  Will PM you details, not the gory ones, just the logistics


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy - I know this has been a hard decision for you to make - with some not so helpful consultants on the way...


    


Take very good care and am thinking of you


Mini xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Diesy, glad that you are booked in to get your fibroids sorted, I'm sure that you will find a way to pay the bill   . Hope it goes well and you are soon back on track tx-wise   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Diesy

Hi Mini & Lou-Ann & Everyone,

Thanks for the back-up   Having a little nervous breakdown to myself while I look at credit cards and balance transfers    I think I should maybe have done that before now.  But The Force was really strong on this one   Hound is going to take me a walk to cheer me up.  I guess just gotta work on the bigger picture and also get a new job pronto.  

Eeeeeek Diesy xx


----------



## Fraggles

Hi

Have a look at getting a cashback plan if you have regular treatment e.g osteo, physio etc. I get upto 50% of treatment costs back upto about £260 p.a with axa and am going to get £220 for giving birth to a single and more for multiples. Apparently you can't claim for the first year where birth is concerned but it is a lovely surprise. 

x


----------



## Fraggles

Diesy pleased you had surgery planned and big hugs for the horrible financial worries.


----------



## Diesy

Gosh, £220 for giving birth.  That is quite surreal   

Thanks Fraggles   Hoping to sleep a bit more than last night   xx


----------



## Sima

ooh - I like the sound of the cash back plan.


----------



## Diesy

Counting up my Goldfish credit card points  

Cashback does sound very nice


----------



## Matilda7

Booked my initial consultation for egg sharing at LWC Darlington today!  Feeling quite giddy, but also apprehensive.  I also haven't discussed this with any of my friends or family yet and, at the moment, I'm feeling like I don't want to tell anyone until I (hopefully!) am pregnant.  What did you all do? x


----------



## GIAToo

Matilda - good luck first of all      Personally I told loads of people, main reason at the time was I didn't want to suddenly announce I was pregnant and have people gossiping about how/who/when etc.  However, as I went through one, then two, then three........cycles, I did wish I hadn't told quite so many people.  With hindsight I would have told a few close friends and family.  I do believe (although of course it is totally your choice)  that is better to at least tell one other person as it is a very difficult thing to go through and very much a rollercoaster ride so it will help to have someone to talk to and perhaps help you make decisions whilst your going through your cycle (even though I had lots of people to talk to, making decisions, usually when you are highly emotional, was one of the hardest things).

Just my thoughts based on my own experience and with the wonderful benefit of hindsight! 

Take care
GIA Tooxx


----------



## Minnie35

Diesy thinking of you       . How are you doing chuck?   


Hiya Matilda, good luck with the consultation.  I told quite a few of my friends. The most helpful and emotionally supportive have been my two most motherly friends (one with 4 kids and one with 3) - because they're the ones who can empathise most with the need to have children. I agree with GIAtoo that I'd tell at least one person.  But you can do that at any stage if you simply don't feel ready yet.


Minnie x


----------



## Diesy

Hi Minnie - Thanks doll.  Howz you?  Not doing too bad, very easily tired and getting quite a lot of pain from last week's op.  Hilarious 7 hr journey home with friend and hound...not.  Happy I did it though    Got the stitches out today.  Not doing much, started knitting a hat and online window shopping (not content with the thousands I spent last week lol.)  

Hi Matilda - I've got a big gob (for my own secrets) so quite a lot of people know what I'm up to.  Wish I'd kept it shut now but I have had heaps of support and if I'm lucky it will all come out in the wash...or everyone with think I ate all the pies for about 9 months.  I've thrown some confusion into the mix by letting wider family know I am going to apply for adopting.  Good luck, think it all a personal choice on who you tell.  Just work through what suits you  

Hi to everyone    Doped-up Diesy   xx


----------



## ameliacooper

Matilda - re the telling not telling friends/family. 


Having been there (one DD aged 3) and about to start all over again (yikes) i would be in the camp of being very careful who you tell and not too many people.  i definitely did not tell my family and they went mad and this next one will send them over the edge i'm sure - however my DD i feel would be better off with a sibling and we will just struggle on the 3 of us - urrrrgh can't even bear to think about it!


With my DD i only told 2 people - one whom was pregnant via a one night stand and has a boy just a few months older - and although we are still friends i regret telling her - i feel she used my gossip to divert away from hers - but i guess i can understand that!


the other friend went on to have her infertility issues and the relationship has become strained.  


you must remember one thing - once you tell - you can't take it back.  They will keep asking how you are getting on (v annoying if you don't want to discuss it) and they will always know how your child was conceived and it may come out before you are ready!  


Choose very carefully.  this time round i have one friend who i have told of my plans - he is male - and i don't plan on telling anyone until i am 15 or so weeks and i am sure that baby is all ok - i am 40 now so nervous that all is going to be ok.


Good luck it is a scary yet totally fulfilling journey xx


----------



## Matilda7

Thanks for all your responses.  I think I'm edging towards not telling anyone until I'm pregnant (fingers crossed).  I don't really share any of my personal stuff with family or friends and prefer to just trust in my own judgement on most things.  The way I see it, I've reached this decision on my own, after over two years of consideration, and I feel like I just don't need people putting their (possibly negative) spin on things.  Don't know what the hell I'll do when the clinic want someone to be with me for egg collection, etc, but I'll have to cross that bridge when I come to it!


----------



## Tommi

Matilda, I'd be more than happy to accompany you for appointments if we're in the same-ish area if I possibly can. PM me and I'll let you know where I am!


----------



## Diesy

Just coming in to drum fingers loudly somewhere.  Grrr...


----------



## greatgazza

Why what's up Diesy??

GGx


----------



## Diesy

Hi GG,

How are you?  Me, well, 3 months to go and counting    I don't think I can start till January because I'll only have time for 2 day blasts   because of Xmas getting in the way, so that is 4 months!  And I can't even walk the dog yet    And I feel really quite rubbish still    Aw, just kinda bored waiting already!  Need anything knitted?

Diesy   xx


----------



## greatgazza

Oh dear, sorry you're feeling rubbish.  The wait does seem frustrating but i bet it will go quite quickly with xmas and new year in there etc and perhaps the small consolation is you can have a few vinos?? 

Haha, you're a knitter are you?  Wish i was i need everything!

When will you be allowed to do more/walk the dog and stuff?

GGx


----------



## Diesy

Yup, still off work, it's not quite 3 weeks since the op but feel pretty awful and get a bit of pain if I'm on my feet for any length of time.  I'm assured and am happy this is a normal response, I have healed up really well and the scars are disappearing!  My dog pulls to sniff and is very strong so if I can't lift anything for 6 weeks I think that means no walkies either.  I'll see how I get on.  I think another week of feeling crapola and I might be on the mend.    

Think I'll start the vino now   You're up late!  Would you like booties?  I still have the half knitted scarf I started for my ex lying there, I might not be a 'finisher'   I do have to find a new job, so that'll keep me busy.  But I want to go do stuff with sperm  

Diesy xx


----------



## Tommi

Diesy   Very funny about the sperm!  
I have in my pile of unfinished knitting... a jumper for a ten year old, a jumper for a four year old, a scarf, some gloves, some bunting (yes... I knit bunting!) and various other bits and pieces. Some really lovely wool is the first thing I'll allow myself to buy when I get a BFP (thinking really positive here!). I was bought one of those Cath Kidston knitting needle sets. Trouble is I keep snapping the needles when I knit! They were laughing at me in the shop saying I had knitting rage    but really I think I'm better off with the metal needles than the flimsy bamboo ones!  
Hope you're feeling better today.
T xx


----------



## Diesy

Tommi, are you on Ravelry?  A bit like ******** for knitters.  I'm knitting heaps of stuff off there   Ok, so one hat, which doesn't fit, but will fit my friend's 5 year old when she's 7   Bamboo needles sounds a bit weak to me too.  Knitting rage    I'd be worried I'd snap them in my bag, I used to knit on the bus.  Plus you really can't take someone's eye out with a bamboo one...mmm...  Charity shops are good for the old needles, but that's really random.

You know, I'm just so glad I had the op when I did.  So feeling happy that I am on the road in the right direction as opposed to still at the roundabout trying to read the signposts as I go round...and...round.  

Hope everyone else is feeling good 
Diesy xx


----------



## Tommi

Oooo never heard of ravelry! Going to be googling that one!  
So glad you're on the mend Diesy. Not long now!
T x


----------



## Diesy

Aw, thanks  The calender is getting marked up! xx

http://www.ravelry.com/

/links


----------



## Minnie35

I hope you feel better soon Diesy   .


----------



## Diesy

Thanks Minnie!   I am feeling an awful lot better - yay!!!

How are you doing?  (Was that a bit Joey from Friends?   )


----------



## Minnie35

Hee hee Diesy I always think that when I say how are you doing! I'm fine thanks, zonked as a twonk but fine - all going OK as far as I know - will find out tomorrow anyway as I have 12 week scan - erk!


How fab to hear you're feeling a bit better at last. Hooray!


Not long now, look after you and here's to feeling better and better      



Minnie xxxx


----------



## Diesy

Hi Minnie   How'd the scan go?  

Well, that feeling good yay bit was short lived - boo hiss!  So I've had to take it really easy, that was after a week of doing stuff and getting steadily worse.  Eeek, hope this isn't going to put my dates back   

It's oh so quiet in here btw.  I'm half expecting Biork to pop any minute in a cute little shift dress.  I'm thinking of bringing some cake in to temp unsuspecting passers by with.  That's gotcha, ain't it!

So, who's lurking?  Come in and entertain me while I wait for for tissue and muscle reattaching without pain!  Are you listening tissue and muscle, don't you rubber ear me, we're in this together!  See what happens when it's quiet!  I start conversing with my uterus!  And don't even get me started Aunt Flo, what you pulled this weekend was bang out of order   next month I'm getting inebriated, see how you like that.  Anyway, we're not speaking, no cake for you!  It'll be quiet next month, I'm doing NaNoWriMo, 1,600 words a day    I probably will end up bald too - eeek!

Yup, given the chance I'm going to make some poor wee child a fantastic mummy


----------



## morrigan

Happy Halloween girls   

 x


----------



## Marra

and to you Morrigan. Like the groovy pumpkins!
xx


----------



## Diesy

Hey, I was just catching up on some posts there and I just want to say to each and every one of the single girlies that post...

 You are an inspiration! 
And thank you for keeping me sane in this crazy world!​
Sending mega hugs to all of you and all the LOs. It's so fantastic to be able to follow your journeys and see the lovely little pics of the beautiful babies on the profiles. This is worth all the raspery leaf tea in China, or wherever they grow  For all those still en route, keep the faith and keep working on the Plan B, it's not always the lesser option. Remember we've all been through it to get to here even. 

Anyhoo, nuff said, have a fab weekend and smile, or giggle ironically at something 
 Diesy xxx 

​


----------



## Tommi

Diesy... you are FAB!    
There's a message on its way...


----------



## Diesy

Tommi, what can I say , I was really feeling the love yesterday!


----------



## Tommi

Always a good thing!
I'm still up to my eyes in editing... but that message is def on its way!


----------



## Diesy

Hey Tommi - Keep up the editing, you have my sympathies, I can't edit, t'is my downfall!  Get choc, it's full of calcium


----------



## Betty-Boo

Love your thinking Diesy       
How are you feeling?  On the mend?


M xx


----------



## Diesy

Well, the diet is going well    I've kinda stalled on the novel at 7,000 words...think need more choc power  

I'm ok thanks, getting there slowly   How are you?  xx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Mmm... okish ... Diet hit the wall ... Ah well - job is awful!  Looking forward to the New Year!
Still not facing up to not having any more treatment ... Really need too!
M xx


----------



## Diesy

Loosing hope or relinquishing expection is so hard. It's a credit to your resilience and motivation that you are not able to accept it. (There are times I still go to phone my mother.) I don't know what to say, what a crappy decision to make. I'm not there yet and there ae are times when I think I'm never going to make it to tcc. We all just have to take one day at a time and do the best with what we have. Or throw a lot of stuff around the house and scream. I may not be the best example to follow. Lots and lots of hugs xxx


----------



## smc81

Hi ladies

Just wanted to drop a note to say hi, have been reading some of the posts - but not all of them  70 pages wow!!

I think I knew when i was in my mid twenties that this was the path I was going to follow - to me it's not even Plan B, it's in some ways a simpler version of Plan A. However, I do sometimes have a little cry when I see families on tv, in films, or just walking down the street! Then I think of what I could have with a little bundle of my own and I know that I won't even think twice about men! Until then (fingers crossed) I#ll just make sure I always have a pack of tissues at the ready!

S xx


----------



## Diesy

Mini - I think it would have been easier to say adjustment is difficult  

Smc - Hi   Isn't it great when your Plan B makes more sense than your Plan A    Ocationally I think of the men I've left in the past, that sounds like there were loads   but there wasn't that many!  Anyway I think phew or    So it's all good.  Hope we get there in the end    Keep us posted on your progress 

Diesy xx


----------



## smc81

Diesy - definitely agree on that! When I think of the men in my past I know that I would much rather do this by myself than with one of them - in fact that very thought either makes me laugh or gives me shivers!
Hope we get there too!
S xx


----------



## Diesy

Well Smc, if you saw my post on the internet dating thread you'll know this ones in my present aren't hitting the grade either.  Oh dear, I'm advertising my other posts, not a god sign   

I'm tired, lot of work stress over the weekend.  I think I need to do complete rest for the next three weeks, pull the plug on the job hunt and relocation ideas.  Just lots of reading and knitting, try to get my health back on track.  Deep cleansing breath, where's the wee dude for that?  And no internet dating, although that is easy to resist  

How's everyone else?  Hope good     xx


----------



## indekiwi

There is a programme focusing a c. 10 min slot on epigenetics on Channel 4's "Brave New World" right now (errr Monday night at 20:40).  

A-Mx


----------



## GIAToo

Just caught Professor Winston...did I miss it?   
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Thank you Inde    - missed the first bit ... will catch it on Channel 4OD.
Mum's tuned in too!! 


(Think she maybe telling me something ...    )


Mini xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

thanks for that tip INde just in time to get 4+1

Lxx


----------



## lulumead

Just popping on to wish all the singlies, posting or reading a very happy Christmas and fantastic 2012 with lots more dreams coming true.

Xxxxxxx


----------



## some1

Thanks Lulu - same to you   

Merry Christmas to everyone reading!  Hoping and wishing that lots more dreams come true in 2012    


Some1

xx


----------



## Tommi

Thanks Lulu! And a very Merry Christmas to you too and to everyone on here  
May 2012 bring all we wish for!      
T xx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Merry Christmas to everyone here   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Betty-Boo

Merry Christmas and a massive      to 2012 .. Bring it on!!


Mini xxxx


----------



## indekiwi

Wishing everyone on the singles boards - either actively posting or secretly lurking - lots of love and a wonderful, peaceful time over Christmas and into the New Year. For those still waiting for their lives to be blessed by children, I hope 2012 sees the realisation of those dreams.

A-Mx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Wishing everyone a wonderful Christmas [/url
L x


----------



## bluprimrose

hello


just wanted to wish all my wonderful ffs a truly merry christmas (sorry i'm a bit late!) and a wonderful 2012.  


i really really hope everyone's dreams come true next year (if not before!) - we all deserve it!


you are a group of fabulously strong and determined women and i'm glad to have you.  sorry i haven't posted much recently, blubaby is keeping me on my toes, but i check in and see how you are often.


with lots of love &     s


bp & blubaby xxxx


----------



## caramac

Merry Christmas to all the singler FFers! In 2011 we've had so much amazing news with lots of babies and new bumps on the way...I am absolutely sure that 2012 will be just as amazing and many more of us will achieve our dreams. xxx


----------



## smilingandwishing

To all the wonderful single FFs - I hope you have had a wonderful Christmas and I wish everyone a 2012 full of good news and the realisation of dreams. 

Thank you to all of you for the fantastic support you give. Though I don't always get to post much, knowing you are all there is a godsend.

Lots of love, Smiling and smilingbaby xx


----------



## blueytoo

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas.

I haven't been posting much as I can never seem to bare it too much after a miscarriage. I'm sorry for that. I was also thrown by some news re my egg donations. I knew that all of the women had got pregnant but I sent off for the live birth information from the HFEA and found out that 4 babies had been born, including a set of twins from my first donation. Apparently, FET births aren't included so there could be more out there. I think the results of the first donation hurts the most as my half of my eggs didn't fertilise at all so I didn't even get to have one embryo transferred yet all the other half that went to my recipients did and they then had twins. I chose not to find out the sex of the babies as I suspect that would have made me feel even worse.

So it very much appears that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my eggs, and it is likely that I am just one of those woman who can't carry (well not anymore anyway). It has been suggested to me recently that it could be as a result of my emergency c section, but who knows. I get perfect linings but my body just kills off the baby every single time I do get pregnant. It's either that or I've just been really unlucky and had four chromosonally abnormal babies and my body has recognised this and dealt with it. It's hard to know what to think after two miscarriages with my own eggs and two with donor eggs.

I've toyed with all sorts of way forward options including trying again with my own eggs, hysteroscopy at Serum and even IUI. But, as a student now, not earning any money and paying school fees for my son, I can't afford any of these options.


----------



## Betty-Boo

Massive hugs bluey - am on iPhone so having difficulty in posting. Didn't want to read & run. 
I really hope with all my heart that things work out next year.

Take very good care 
Mini xx


----------



## Diesy

My heart goes out to you BlueyToo  

     for 2012

Diesy xx


----------



## Marra

Big hugs BlueyToo     It is just the worst thing to go through repeated miscarriages, such a rollercoaster of emotions. I really hope 2012 is a better year for you, whatever you decide to go ahead with.

Lots of love
Marra
xx


----------



## indekiwi

Bluey, am overseas and posting on iPhone so this has to be brief - so hoping that the difficult decisions you face are smothered by a successful pregnancy during 2012. I can't imagine for a moment the depth and gamut of emotion you have gone through in receiving the HFEA information on top of so many blighted pregnancies. . Wish I had a magic wand to wipe away the pain and assure success for you.  

A-Mx


----------



## kizzi79

Bluey - just don't know what to say      - but please know I'm thinking of you and wishing you success in 2012   .

Love Krissi x


----------



## smc81

Blueytoo - I am still fairly new on here, but your posts have really struck a chord. I am only at the beginning of my journey an have been worrying constantly about the what ifs, but you show such strength, you really are an inspiration and I just hope that things work out for you.
I truly wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I just don't.
Wishing you all the best and sending   and   your way.

S xxx


----------



## GIAToo

Bluey - wanted to send you some     I found one miscarriage hard enough to cope with so my heart goes out to you. Like Inde, I wish I could wave a magic wand and make things better/happen for you.
Take care 
GIA Tooxx


----------



## Roo67

Blueytoo - I just wanted to send you some    m/c are so hard to deal with and on top of that knowing that your eggs have produced babies for other ladies must make it doubly hard.

As you know I have also had several m/c over the years and just felt that i was throwing good money away just continuing with FET after FET with the hope that one of them would be sticky - it never happened. 

I really put my success this time down to the hysteroscopy in Athens, where they removed lots of scar tissue, that together with AB's and Penny's individualised programme have made the difference for me 

I know money is tight but if there is anyway that you could raise the money for a hysto (in Athens - not Refrofit as they said all was normal )I would urge you to do this, I know it does not work for everyone, but for the majority of ladies it does. Your history sounds very similar to mine, I have always had perfect linings and have had 4 m/c all with different donors, I could never accept that it was just bad luck, I went down the immunes route thinking that this was the problem, then had 2 failures with full immunes.

I'm sorry if this has confused you further but like you I couldn't face another m/c - I am very lucky to be over 1/2 way to holding my babies now, something I never though would happen

R xx


----------



## ♥JJ1♥

Bluey so sorry for the pain you're going through. I hope that you find a way forward x


----------



## Roo67

I hope that you can find a way forward in 2012 JJ1 

Rx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Blueytoo, sending you    and    that 2012 finds you with a way forward that makes your dreams come true   

Lou-Ann x


----------



## blueytoo

Thank you all for your kind words. Roo - your suggestion is exactly what I had planned to do & if I had credit cards then I would but I don't believe in having any debt at all so I can only afford to do tx not both  

JJ and Mini - I really hope that you both find a way forward this year too    

Sorry for not doing more personals but we've only just woken up & my DS is making bacon sandwiches so I must dash!

Love to all

Xx


----------



## some1

Bluey - just wanted to send you some      and lots of      for your tx in April

Some1

xx


----------



## Diesy

*Happy Valentine's Day 
Girlies & Babies & Bumps *


----------



## Tommi

Diesy how lovely! You too!  
I'd happily ban valentine's day for anyone over the age of 13. Although, as a friend said, it is the one day of the year when miserable couples pretend they made the right choice so it would be mean to take that away from them!


----------



## Diesy

Ok, so I might be being a little ironic  But I felt in good enough company to bring it up. I think we tend to think of it as Discrimination to Singles Day. Friend just sent me this. 
FIVE SECRETS TO A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP:
1) It's important to have a man who helps at home and knows how to cook, clean & has a job.
2) It's important to have a man who can make you laugh.
3) It's important to have a man you can trust and wants only you.
4) It's important to have a man who is good in bed & enjoys being with you.
5) It's absolutely f*****g vital that these four men don't know each other.


----------



## Betty-Boo

Language Timothy!   


M xx


----------



## Diesy

Opps, could it be flipping? Liking this orange...that must because I am loaded with the cold and I'm getting a bit of vit C from it.  Boohoo, I have a job interview in the south too and it's not looking likely I can go. 
Diesy xx

PS Who's Timothy Is he one of your 4 men, Mini?


----------



## Betty-Boo

4 men?? God I wish!     
M xx


----------



## Diesy

*or *
  
Who's this wee dude?  We don't see a lot of him!


----------



## caramac

Lol! Diesy!!


----------



## Diesy

Hi Peeps 

Just wanted to post a wee message because I'm not reading the threads or posting right now. I feel a bit bad that I can't be around to support those at the mummyhood bus stop, or those already on that party double decker. So I'm not ignoring everyone, still sending funny faces  and these dudes     . Working hard to get myself out of the mess I've ended up in, so hope to be back soon with the bandwidth to bring support and giggles to the proceedings! 
Take care till then everybody - Diesy xx 

PS Seem to be doing a lot of this right now (see below).


----------



## greatgazza

Hi Diesy,

Sorry to hear you're in a bit of a mess.  What's up?  Is it the work/possible relocation dilemma?     

Anything we can do?

GGxx


----------



## Tommi

Diesy - there's an email on the way, just wanted to give you some of these guys... they're cuter than some of the square dudes on gmail!

                               

Txx


----------



## Lou-Ann

Diesy, sending you some    and    .

Lou-Ann x


----------



## Diesy

Cheers m'dears  Hope you're all doing ok.

Basically I can't get a job. Due to housing benefit cuts I've got £10 per month for everything over and above the mortgage and the council tax. Friend has offered me a room near here if I rent my place out but that's not a financial winner, wondering if time to sell up  Eeeek... Diesy  xx


----------



## some1

Diesy - sending you lots of       , sounds like you are in a really tough situation at the moment.  Hope that things get better really soon     

Some1

xx


----------



## bingbong

Diesy I was just thinking about you and how your appt is finally coming up. Sorry to hear that things are tough and remember that we're all here to help and support you        


bingbong x


----------



## indekiwi

Diesy, sending you lots of      and     .  So sorry you are going through this series of difficulties.   .  Putting it out to the big wide universe to cut you a break hun.  


A-Mx


----------



## Betty-Boo

Diesy sweetie - never let them get you down - which I know you don't.  
Take care - it will all come good....     


All the best for your appointment too.


  Tis xx


Massive    to all from me.


Tis xx


----------



## silverbird

Not in a good way today.  SIL came to say she is 10 weeks pregant.  They didn't act senstive at all even though they new I'd been having treatment. She will be due Oct when I would have been if my treatment worked.  I just wanted husband and a baby.  Was that so much to ask? ******** is full of baby pics and I can't even hide most of them.  Why couldn't I have gotten married and had a kid instread of getting married and getting widowed.  Not doing well today.


----------



## greatgazza

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time silverbird.       Life really totally sucks sometimes and you have had more than your fair share.  Sorry your family weren't more sensitive, it always amazes me when people aren't more thoughtful.    

GGx


----------



## Rose39

I'm so sorry Silverbird - I wish that people could be more sensitive. Sending you big hugs     

Rose xx


----------



## Elle72

Dear Silverbird,
it is very sad when people just don't pay that little bit of extra attention when they talk. I think it is normal to be upset and normal to feel blue. I think in moments like these you have to do your best to be surrounded by people who care and are sensible enough not to hurt you. There is no cure for such pain, we just need to care good care of ourselves and day after day we can and will be better. Tonight if I were you I would just do one little thing for myself, let it be some nice food, a drink, a movie a stupid tv series, whatever distracts you. Pick one thing just for you, special lady. And if you feel like venting we are all here to listen 
Big hugs xx


----------



## Tommi

Thinking of you Silverbird   Such a tough time  
Txx


----------



## Diesy

Hi Silverbird - It's a really awful position you are in, I understand why tx is a focus for you but I wish you had a bit more time between that and your husband's passing. I really hope you get a nice present from mother nature for your next round. Work on your support network, I know it can be unreliable at times like this, but try to keep the good ones close and the more problematic at a distance. Diesy  xx


----------



## Diesy

Thanks peeps for my messages, means a lot.  It's not a great sign when you can't even operate your online support team!   at me.  Trying some mindfulness, tapping and would like some nice affirmations...any ideas how to find?  Just trying to keep going.  I'm not sure what's next, defo can't go on like this.  Not optimistic on chances of a regular job.  As things are there is no way I could contemplate bringing a child into this life the way it is.  (If only we had a welfare state   )  I know jobs and money can appear insignificant when dealing with life and death but a few of you know my story.  Life is so empty, at times I wonder why I struggled through, it feels like a waste of time right now.  Sorry for the depressing post...off to the shop for choc.   to all, Diesy xx


----------



## Tommi

Esperanza lots of   for you and for Silverbird and Diesy too   In fact it's time for one of these  

I completely agree that the challenges in life help to shape us and make us more than we ever thought possible of ourselves. I'd still like a break from it sometimes though as we all would I guess!    I don't know why life hits some more than others. I suppose it doesn't do to compare. But I do look at some around me and wonder how they would cope with a fraction of what some on this site have already dealt with and are continuing to deal with. And I've had some truly crappy things said to me about how we "attract" experiences in our lives and how we "choose" what happens to us...    

One of my favourite affirmations is "This too shall pass" - it helps me remember the temporary nature of things, good and bad. Basically it's the same as your affirmation Esperanza. And if I feel really bad it's "All shall be well..." - combined with cake of course! In fact I might bake a cake and write that on it! Maybe that's a new business idea?! Affirmation cakes... soothing for body and soul! You heard it here first!

Txx


----------



## bingbong

Tommi I love 'this too shall pass' it's so good to remember that when times are tough. 


Silverbird    I hope that you're feeling better soon, it's a hard part of this journey when we have to grieve for what we don't have or lost.


Diesy, mindfulness and EFT are fab and I'm sure will help. There are loads of affirmations out there, try google. One that I think can be helpful is 'despite of the fact that........... I love and respect myself', it can be changed but for you you'd have despite of the fact that I can't find a job/don't know where to live/am not pregnant. The second part depends on what you're struggling with at the moment. Hang in there hun, this too shall pass   


bingbong x


----------



## Elle72

Oh yes Tommy, don't you hate those ones who say all those things like, what goes around comes around, happy go lucky, sorts of things like you cannot put your happiness in others you have to be happy on your own.
Fine but try to be that happy after just a hint of what happened to some? And again not looking for pity here but really, sometimes people should fall off the cloud where they are living and taste some reality. One thing I believe,if and when you survive all the crap, you become strong, maybe bitter ( we can all work on this with cake!) bu definetively strong!


----------



## Tommi

Definitely stronger Elle! Trouble is, that can make us seem a bit "different" for want of a better word! Guess that's why it's important we stick together!  
Bingbong I'm going to be using that affirmation I think. It's great!
Txx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

just sending some     to all those who need them, especially silverbird, diesy and esperanza

Suitcase
x


----------



## GIAToo

Oh dear - think I should be sending some hugs too.       
I have used mindfulness and EFT - the first is my preferred method, but I still struggle on some days and have to push myself to practice the mindfulness.  It does work though   

Take care everyone   
GIA Tooxxx


----------



## sweet1

You know the one I hate the most? 'Everything happens for a reason'. And yet sooooooo many people say it. What is the 'reason' one of my best friends has been through 3 rounds of failed IVF and now has breast cancer due to a rare gene and aggravated by the IVF, and may never have another chance? 

Love 'this too shall pass' though, it is a very comforting expression.

Love and hugs to all those going through it at the moment. It will not be like this forever.


----------



## Elle72

Sweetsa oh yes, everything happens for a reason it's really the most stupid thing to say. What reason I guess you can say it after IF eventually you are happy about how things went, but until now I cannot see all these reasons behind my endometriosis apart from BAD LUCK! Oh yes maybe I have developed my ironic sense of humor but again I am not a stand up comedian so thanks, not needed!

Hugs to allx


----------



## Tommi

Ladies... couldn't agree more!  

Elle your comment about luck reminds me of an Unthanks track... there's a line in it that goes "If it wasn't for bad luck we'd have no luck at all"... I kind of find that quite hopeful in a strange kind of way!  

Txx


----------



## Elle72

Tommi, I guess you are right!!


----------



## DZWSingleMumma

Hey Ladies,

Is anyone currently cycling as a singley in Brno,CZ?  I wanted to check and see if anything has changed around sperm storage fees as I haven't been asked for any additional money yet?  Please PM me off thread if you are due to CZ legal issues!

Ta,

Dawn


----------



## Betty-Boo

Dawn I was just thinking the same - perhaps I paid for 5 years storage.  Can't remember now ..   


Tis xx


----------



## suitcase of dreams

they have always been pretty efficient with the fees, so am sure if you owe anything, you'll get an email


----------



## silverbird

Thanks everyone! Can't say I'm feeling better as I now have a sinking gold

 to Diesy and everyone in need hope things go OK.


----------



## silverbird

Anyone been watching silent witness on BCC 1? I've just been catching up on the ones from Easter and it fetured a choice mum! She was one of the cops, not a coprse.  She explained about a known donor to the colleague who did a bit of a double take but was thne cool with it.  Was really impressed as haven't really seen choice mums on tv before let alone british tv and it was really nicley done.


----------



## Tommi

Yes! I saw it. Excellent to have it covered on prime tv. Harry seemed to really respect her for it. Was certainly v supportive. Only thing I didn't like about it was that they made it sound easy. Want a baby and don't have a man? Just pop to a clinic. We all know it's not that easy! But overall it was great to see.
Txx


----------



## silverbird

I thought the way she spoke so flipantly about her donor betrayed the thought that goes into the dession but I also thought it was just her sence of hummor.  I could see myself explaining in such as way because it's not always the right time or easy to give someone all the heavy issues invovled.


----------



## Tommi

Yes that's true. If I was in that situation I would have done the same. Harry would have been reaching for the car door if she'd launched into the whole decision-making angst!


----------



## Diesy

Hi Everybody - I was just stopping by to check something for the first time in nearly 5 months and wanted to say hello. I haven't caught up with any posts but I hope your all doing great...or on your way to great!



 
 



It's The Plough in +ve's for all of you that don't have enough naff and stupid in your lives already. 

 Diesy  oxo


----------



## silverbird

Yah! Nice to see you Diesy and glad I'm not the only one up at stupid o'clock!


----------



## Tommi

Lovely to see you Diesy! 

Look who turned up just for you!  

Txx


----------



## Sima

Hey Diesy - nice to see you posting again


----------



## suitcase of dreams

hello everyone 

hope you're all doing well, and welcome back diesy 

just popping on to point you in the direction of this poll for our next big meet up:
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=291479.0

we'll be meeting either in Bicester which is between jctns 9 and 10 of the M40 or Thame - junctions 7/8 off the M40 - both are easily accessible from London, the SE and the Midlands  
It will be in a hotel with our own private function room and catering provided. Staying over is an option for those coming from further afield
please vote for your preferred location and date

it would be lovely to see some of the newer members of the singles board there - these meets are a great way to share experiences and for those still ttc, a chance to chat with those who have been successful

everyone welcome, so please vote and join us!
Suitcase
x

PS aweeze, cem and I are organising the meet, so please PM us if questions...


----------



## Diesy

Cheers m'dears! Hope you are all doing well  Bit scared to go on the boards and see what I've missed, be a shock to my system 

Even so, missed y'all peeps and hope everything's dandy (that goes for the newbies I don't know too).

TTFN xox


----------



## Tommi

Good to see you on here Diesy!


----------



## indekiwi

Diesy,    Am a bit manic with a full house at the mo but will drop you a line once a free-ish moment hits.   


A-Mx


----------



## Diesy

Indiwiki  No rush of course  Hope you are enjoying the summer  xx


----------



## smilingandwishing

Hi Deisy!!  

How are you? Lovely to see you on here again!

Smiling xx


----------



## Diesy

Hello Smiling 

Thank you  I have been far, far away. How are you? I haven't really caught up with anyone, how's your wee one? You may be seeing more of me here, I may be up to no good! 

Diesy xx


----------



## Tommi

Up to no good sounds good to me!

Txx


----------



## smilingandwishing

I'm liking the thought of being up to no good!!

We are very well. My cheeky little monkey is keeping me on my toes!

Smiling xx


----------



## Diesy

You two! Such a bad influence!  xx

PS Hello to the cheeky monkey! Can't believe he is a year and 8 months!


----------



## Amittai

Hi everyone,

Diesy, Thetis - from Reprofit boards!
Suitcase - you helped me loads when i started out in beginning 2011 - when i was utterly clueless, hopefully slightly less clueless now! I see your little guys are getting real big now, awesome..
indekiwi, smilingandwishing, Tommi - i remember you being on the forum too, and being most inspiring, and you still are! . and Silverbird!

I'm back again.. in a way i could kick myself for wimping out at the time, amazing how much difference 18 months can make to one's egg reserves and chances at my age!
anywayz..
I just finished a cycle of IVF OE, which didnt work and my egg reserve is pretty much a no go.. well, i could try again, but, i've decided to cut to the chase.. and go with adopted ebmby - FET.. and I'm pretty happy with the decision (at the moment).. been posting on Clinic cycling board, but thought it would be good to be in this land too!
I've been really inspired by those who've gone on this journey, on all levels, its mighty complex isnt it, hence I suppose my rather lengthy process of finally getting to this point.
I've just recieved my recipe from the clinic this evening and I start cycling, with  FET in October! (sort of 'scheduled' around the middle I think, depending on AF)
So it's A for Away for October, woot woot!
If anyone happens to be at the clinic at that time, would be awesome to meet up.. I'll confirm my dates once i know for sure..

wishing everyone the best in whatever stages of your journey's you are in and lots of   and 

ps - sorry for those that messaged me just before i fell off the board last year, i went through a bit of a hard time and i just kind of went all internalised. I feel quite bad about that and just wanted to say sorry.. and try again!

happy evenings and rest of the weekend everyone


----------



## Diesy

Hi Amittai! Good to see you back! I've been in the wilderness too, everyone I started out with either has a baby or had a go. Well technically I've had two failed (abandoned) IUI's... Anyways, I think your plan sounds great! I was told by a consultant recently, in Monopoly language "Go straight to DE, do not pass OE", ie forget OE. Said it was by far the most cost effective way to get a baby at my advanced years and my AMH is 19+. I got lots of eggies for my IUI's too. So good luck, you are obviously ready so why hang about!

Thanks for spurring me into action on a mini IVF with your email. I had planned on going in August but that didn't work because of dates and then I was losing track of the calender again plus raising cash for a full IVF was becoming brain damage. Keep us posted on your next adventure!!!

Diesy xox

PS PM on the way later.


----------



## Amittai

Hiya Diesy, you make me laugh with your monopoly language, that is pretty much spot on what i got.. and i think it was realistic and honest.. sadly enough, but such is life, my own fault for dilly dallying so long... that must be harder for you considering you had loads of eggies.. i only had one little one, so I could get my head around it sort of like in a counting way if you know what i mean.

good for you for getting back on the consideration carriage and i hope that whatever you decide to do next goes well without too much roller coastering!

I think i need a few days of like NOT thinking about all of this, i feel thinked out! ... heehee  

but all good...


----------



## indekiwi

Amittai, welcome back.   


Diesy, am on the case viz a PM....


A-Mx


----------



## Amittai

Hiii Indekiwi!!


----------



## Tommi

Hi Amittai  
Best of luck for your FET!   
Txx


----------



## Amittai

Thanks Tommi! I just bought my druggies on line for when dear   arrives, woot woot.!! (though i do worry myself by having little mental wobbles every now and again.. but i spose that is normal, i hope!)

Tommi i hope you are recovering and doing ok after what looks like a difficult August for you.. you are mighty strong from what I can see, and i wish you lots and lots of        and     and   .. look after yourself Tommi , you deserve big time good luck soon soon sooon!!!     for now..


----------



## smilingandwishing

Ammittai and Deisey

So glad your both back on the journey!!  Everything crossed for you both.

I love the monopoly analogy.  It all feels like such a bloomin' board game!  

I think one of the things to take from these boards is just how different everyone's journey is and how much success there is in the end.  I went to a meet up over the Jubilee weekend with the lovely Giatoo and other fab ladies. Many of them I'd met way back at a lunch when there were just three of us preggers out of a table of 16. What is wonderful is that now almost all of those ladies have bundles of joy!  I know it can't work for everyone and my heart breaks for those who are still trying, but the fantastic news is just how many amazing women it is working for. There were some who had found success with IUI after many IVF attempts, some who had found success with IVF with thier own eggs and some with donor eggs. And when we sat and watched the babies play the truth is none of them have stamped on thier bums the way they were created, just great big smiles on both mum and baby cos they were created!!

Praying that your little miracles are on thier way, sitting on the baby cloud, pointing down at you both!

Lots of Love!

Smiling xx


----------



## Amittai

thank you smiling, that is so lovely and so encouraging and so true about the little bambino's!
yay!


----------



## Tommi

Amittai - thanks so much for your lovely words    I really don't feel very strong. Haven't quite had a day without crying yet. But I am getting there. We will all get there one day!    

Smilingandwishing - loved what you said there  

Txx


----------



## Diesy

Well if this is TTC Monopoly I'm in Jail and I did not pass Go and I did not collect £200, darn that would have been bloomin useful too! (see below)

Lovely message Smiling, how are you and your gorgeous tot? Gonna get a PM off to you soon 

Tommi  I can promise it will get easier, you're doing really well even if it doesn't feel it. Shopping has helped me get through some really tough spots and I'm fearful to admit the only time I am really lost is when I can't shop 

So lovely to have you back Amittai - cool beans 

Inde I've not been a good girl  I am rallying more ground support, or they are starting to rally me but only to stop me moaning that I am, not as I think, all alone.


----------



## Minnie35

Amittai and Diesy, welcome back! Good luck with the ET Ammittai, and yes wobbles are so normal  - blimey I so nearly succumbed to the wobble-and-a-half which I had on the morning of the ET which produced Miniminne! The whole thing's an absolute agony of decision-making and uncertainty.  

Tommi                  . Sending my love your way.

Hello all

Minnie x


----------



## Diesy

Minnie, you have no idea how delighted I am to hear that after my mega meltdown this week!  xx


----------



## Amittai

hiya all on this wonderfully wattery day in Blighty!
Minnie, thanks for that and I echo what Diesey says too.. most of the time i feel quite resolute but i get major stage fright, I'm glad to know its normal!
Congrats on your BFP you are doing great, past your 12 weeks, wow..are you going to find out your team?
How are you feeling now that you're 12 weeks? hope you dont mind me asking, I'm just curious really.. i was just wondering eg what surprised you most etc? dont be obliged to answer.. of course.. but wishing you all the best with your little carried growing person

Diesy i like what you say about rallying support.. not a natural thing for me tbh, and one of the things that worries me most about being a single mom.. i've always been so independent and solo, not entirely obviously, but its my natural inclination, kind of.. and now i need to be much more villagey which is great, but its a bit of a change.. 
but i heard a podcast by Nikki Morriset who said she faced a similar dilemna, which was such a relief to hear because i felt so bad about feeling that.. of course i know that the whole journey will naturally change me, and also i will need to actively change certain things too, so I'm all up for that, but like some stuff is harder to get my head around, at the moment, but its all good.. i spose its better to say the feelings that not admit to them, cos thats when they can become a problem.

in case anyone is interrested - look for the single mom of choice podcast here:
https://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/creating-family-talk-about/id266386337?mt=2&ls=1
there are some other interresting ones too

Tommi - how you doing? not long till your next treatment, are you feeling ready or at least a bit stronger? I have major admiration for you and i hope you get some respite from the difficult bits soon..  

Hiya Smiley and Indi and everyone, happy dayzz..



oh and Diesey - hang in there.. mega meltdown fly away...

/links


----------



## Diesy

Amittai will check out that podcast, sounds interesting thanks.  This is probably the first time I've had to say to friends that I need them to be supportive, wish I'd cottoned on to the idea before now   We'll see if it helps.  But I'm in a little world of my own since last week's flip out, boy the sand looks really interesting close up.  Lots of pain today, pain pain go away, come back...never.  Applied for a job, it's surprising relevant, lets hope they think so too.  

Hey, any tips on how to cope next time are more than welcome.  I think I'm going to start with putting dates in the diary.  Maybe pack a bag and write an itinerary, Day 1 book flights, hotel, scan...agghhh!  I think that's were I go to pieces.  I need a minder!

Howz everybody else?


----------



## Minnie35

Amittai   , gosh I must update my signature, and I've noticed my little ticker thing is tiny and illegible compared to everyone else's - how curious! Miniminnie, my wee daughter, was born nearly five months ago! Interestingly for me, I simply never looked back or got cold feet at any point after I got my BFP, and that's still the case to date! I really can't describe how wretched, isolated, desperate and wracked with indecision I was before I got pregnant - my only reminder that I so badly wanted it to happen was the low that I hit every time the IUIs didn't work. My mind was so full of it all that there was no room to sort anything out or get any perspective. Until the minute I saw the BFP I had no idea how I would respond if it actually worked - I was worried that I'd flip out and get scared etc. I couldn't even look at the test once I'd done it - I stuck it in the bathroom cabinet and went and did the vacuum cleaning (at 7am, as you do).

So what has surprised me most is how the doubt utterly left me as soon as I got my BFP, given the uncertainty, wobbles, soul-searching of the two years that led up to it. I just suddenly felt relaxed, happy, confident and looking forward to things to come. When I finally summoned the courage to look at the test, I stood there smiling and saying "oh my god!" in the same way as I had the week before when I finally found a long-lost pair of leggings behind the radiator (but I was a bit more excited  ! And now Miniminnie is with me I feel so blessed and grateful every day. Yes it can get lonely, I (and I'm sure everyone else) yearn for that someone by my side to make ME feel cherished and also to dilute the intensity of every decision and worry that occurs, and to make my flat feel more like a bustling family home, and be a dad for Miniminnie to adore, but even when I'm feeling low I don't ever doubt for a second that my life has been transformed by the presence of my gorgeous daughter.

I know it's probably not that much use hearing that, as you have no idea how you'll feel, but believe me I can relate to your feelings of wobbliness and I know that I'm just so glad I didn't succumb to mine!

Diesy I hope the pain has subsided. Do all the booking and arranging - rememeber (I had to remind myself of this all the time!) you can back out AT ANY POINT so maybe just mechanically do everything to get it all in place, so it's easy to go ahead when the time comes. It doesn't mean you have to go through with it if you strongly feel you can't at the end.  

Lots of love,
Minnie x


----------



## Amittai

Hi Minnie and Diesey!  

cheers for ya messages ladies..  

Diesey - well done on the job applying step, wow, thats a good one in anyone's books.. even though i hated science in school, urrghh.. i do always remember the thing that energy can never be destroyed, it can only be transformed. i like that and probably apply it way beyond it's context extending into every facet of human nature possible.. but in this context, i was say Diesey that applying for a job is definite movement and therefore energy and therefore room for tranforming into maybe surprises!

i totally get the week of being in another or solo world, it is like majorly stressful thinking about all these things! i think i traumatise myself with it sometimes, which i suppose is why i relate to the week and the high levels of sand! 
Minnie, you have just totally articulated the process of this thinking/ doing/ half doing/ properly doing/ thinking/ etc phase so perfectly, it is like breath of fresh air to hear, thank you!

Diesey - from my side, and I still find it hard to articulate why I am even on this path in the first place, but that aside, i totally agree with Minnie, that making it almost mechanical helps. I've kind of been doing that, and after each step, I do find a real sense of accomplishment and a little respite of peace, and I guess that is why I am just keeping going, one step at a time.
I am kind of only thinking of the few steps in front of me, not the whole big thing. maybe that is bad in a way because it i sort of feel that I'm not being mature or grown up enough about it. but it is the way that seems to be working for me.. so sort of what you are saying:
So for me I've got this on at the moment:
Scan - 6 Oct
Fly - 11 Oct
Transfer !!! - 12 Oct
go to Prague for a little rest and to look at the puppet shop under Charles bridge 13 Oct
go home 15 Oct.

But like Minnie says, I am soooooo using your tactics Minnie, is i am saying that at any point, i can change my mind or delay or whatever if i want to. that really helps. and i'm just trying to read  lots of blogs and different things written by people who've done this, to get inspiration and stuff.
oh and i have told very very few people about what i'm doing cos i dont want the stress of having to updte lots of people, articulte things, talk about thigns - that for me are still so kind of hidden and physical, not yet wordy.  (but thats me!)

Minnie - congrats on your little daughter, wow!! so you are a real real example and pioneer!! woot woot!
and thank you so so much for spending the time to explain all of that, it has helped me imensely!! I have no doubt it will help a lot of gals reading this forum.

also what you say about the difficulty of doing it alone, that is a real thing and just because we choose to do it along doesnt mean we don't still have other dreams and other wishes at the same time. I think its healthy to be able to talk about or express both sides. i guess there are not a lot of places where you can really do that.. here is a good one!

Thanks Minnie and Diesey.

today is a good day for me on the nerves front, which is nice nice.  

Diesey - hope the sand is baking and you get to stand on top of some of it, before you know it you're gonna be getting the buckets and spades out! and then onwards and upwards to the Crayons!!

night lovely ladies        
  - diesey this is you and / or me when we are doing our little steps along the way.. to whatever that may be!


----------



## greatgazza

hi all 

glad to hear you're all hanging in there     the journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step and all that.

can't post much as feel surrounded by chaos but just wanted to say that i've just remembered the day i sat at the airport going for my first tx and having a coffee and crying. i was so scared, felt so alone and was so unsure of whether i was doing the right thing and i texted a couple of my closest friends and one of them replied that i could always change my mind, at ANY time, that i didn't have to get on the plane if i didn't want to etc and i realised she was right. what i'm trying to say is it's a flaming scary journey and not an easy path to go down but by god am i glad i took those few steps and got on that plane.... it didn't work first time and i had to get on a couple more planes but it gets easier once you made the first move and the apprehension is far worse than the action....

Good luck, you'll get there!  We were all once where you are and one day, hopefully soon, you will be posting on here reassuring others that it was worth it.   

GGX


----------



## Maya7

Ladies ...    for the next steps forward that you'll make.  


I still look back in awe at my flight into the unknown.  I'd had 3 attempts at LWC which was in effect a safe trip over to London, to Harley street. IUI was too hit and miss for me so I went straight to IVF and before I can even recall having time for a second thought I was on a plane to Czech Republic.  The day before my flight out I did have cause to focus my thoughts on what I wanted in life when I was smashed into by an articulated lorry on my way to my final scan.  A more gentle pause for reflection would have been just fine for me but I still remember spinning across the road terrified that my IVF treatment wouldn't go ahead.  It was all I thought of in that moment.  Flying off to a foreign country, whose language I didn't speak, to a clinic I hadn't met anyone who had actually had treatment at, and undergoing GA for the first time prior to an invasive medical procedure became viewed in perspective -a huge risk but one that I couldn't not risk doing...  I believe we all need to make a leap of faith at some time  in our lives; take a deep breath... and jump I say ...


 
Maya


----------



## Amittai

Hi Maya7 and Gazza 
and Diesey and Minnie!

Thanks for more messages,  I am so eating up all the experiences I can read about especially of the single gals, it is really so helpful not to mention interesting and fascinating and I have so much admiration for all the stories i read, both those who have gone through the whole thing and been lucky at the end, and those who's journey's have ended differently for whatever reason.

Maya I can really relate to the wizzing feeling, like where you say you moved quite quickly to IVF and then even more rapidly to catching a plane to CZ. I sort of feel that I need to act fast, partly to keep the momentum going and partly cos i dont have time to waste and its just a kind of instinctual thing at the moment.. and a bit against the grain cos I'm usually such an over-nalyser (and procrastinator !)
But my goodness Maya that takes to to another level being hit by articulated lorry on the wy to your final scan!! jeeepers you are like a super hero lady!!! and interresting what went through your mind at the time.. I take it you were ok? 
wow Maya, now that is something to tell your little one one day!! jeepers!
Respect!  
i  know what you mean about risking not taking the risk. it feels like a continual balancing act of nervous tension and core sort of 'something i cant articulate' ! if that makes sense...
it does feel like being on a tight rope at the moment, there are so many things at stake but also they are not at stake really, its just a change in priority and some kind of shift to another dimension that IS do-able! and will be fun and will be ok even if it might be hard.
indeed - it is a leap of faith.. i like that.  


aaah Gaza i can also so relate to being in another country, having a cup of coffee and crying - that makes me sad for you but also it makes me think how amazingly brave you were to just keep going and find your way through  it all. it is so inspiring and such a relief to hear.
and like you say it is also such a relief to be able to say i can change my mind at any time!
I guess where I am now is sort of i feel as if I am slowly starting to be able to put things into perspective and explain things to myself sort of and think more rationally about certain things. I need my grown up side for all of that but i also need my like child bit otherwise i wouldn't be able to imagine, or  take the risk  even try, so more balancing i guess!

also toying with the idea of asking Stepan to let me do a 2 emby transfer or just go with 1 which he suggests. for all sorts of reasons. i'm just a bit unsure.. its about possible siblings and full blood relatives for 2 of them (but then there is the money side, which would be a big problem with 2) and its about if one doesn't work, 2 gives me a better chance.. and i don't know what else.. i think i need to go running about it over the next few days before my ET - 12 Oct!!
any tips on that one by any chance? 
in a way, I'm like just go for one, 2 is crazy... cos i dont have any family here in England at all, so it would be much more grown up to go for 1 wouldn't it.. but just cant help thinking of 2.. while i'm at it, and seeing as i am getting more and more older-er.

otherwise thanks for messages ladies, Diesey thinking of you!!
Minnie hope you are having the best fun with your LO, you can run around in the coloured leaves in the park! pity we cant make leaf people as easily as snow people!

have good weekends everyone,....


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## greatgazza

amittai, i was always going to go for 2 embies, 1 was just something i never entertained as I wanted there to be more chance of one of them sticking.  i was 42 when i got pg with bozo and just knew time was running out. my pg did start out as twins and whilst that would have been incredibly hard work i was actually really excited about it as i never wanted an only child and that would have meant i would never have to go thru tx again for a sibling but sadly it wasn't meant to be.

i hear what you're saying about not having any family here but if you read some other stories on here you will see that having family doesn't automatically = support and help  .  Many of the ladies on here have to make our friends our support network and 'family'.

Wow Oct 12th, not long, how exciting!

GGx


----------



## Minnie35

GG   


I just want to say HEAR HEAR! to Maya and GG's encouraging messages. It's scary but if you don't do the scary stuff you end up stuck.  If you do do the scary stuff, I think your life flows on, even if it's not in the way you originally intended. I spent too many years being too afraid to unstick myself! It's bloomin' hard to make the leap of faith though   .  But now I've got Mm I feel I've got the best ever illustration of the fact that something being difficult doesn't mean it's not worth it - yes it's harder being a mum on your own but it's wonderful being a mum, and the wonderfulness outweighs the difficulty beyond compare xx


Minnie x


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## Diesy

Hello, lovely replies   I am going to read them all at least 20 times in the next couple of weeks...but right now I feel like a    I'm so tired and my mind is full of STUFF.

Amittai - not long now...I'd go for two too.  (  that's if I were actually doing it   as opposed to . )  Will be like     during your WW2.

Thanks for the tips the other night Minnie, I'm working on the finance side.  After getting a bit ****** off about the work side of things I've refocused back into my own work to see where that takes me.

Anyways, good reading, thanks    Cuddles to the   xox


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## Amittai

Hi Gals!
Diesy,
I like your sunflower pic, its nice, it is perfect for you! and i totally relate to the mind being full of stuff.. i feel like that at the moment, i feel like i need to go and listen to hymns or something for calmness to think.  
but also excited.. 2 weeks till Transfer, yikes!!! and woot woot!
crazzyyyyyy crazy this 21st century of choice and opportunity and liberty we live in!!!
    
i also definitely think your work is amazing and rocks and would be a wonderful kind of complementory thing, to bambino type plans
and I like having you on our board family !!  

Minnie i love the way you describe your decision and your life and your LO. its comes across as really genuine and open and it really feels like there is so much love in your little family. I think your LO is a very lucky lucky LO! the leap of faith description is exactly how i am trying to look at it. it is a huge leap isnt it, but its also natural little jump too, in the grand scheme of human nature. 
thanks Minnie  

Gazza thanks so much for your view on 2 embies and your journey around that. I've thought a lot about it the last 2 days and since reading your message. I am sorry you never got to have your little siblings, i can imagine your dissapointment, but it is lucky for me to hare your thinking process around how you did see it as feasable, even if it would have been so hard. Your little one is just adorable with the little eyes popping out of its cape!
i havent decided entirely yet, but I am considering more the option of going for 2, and especially as it seems every common to go for two for similar reasons that i haev thought of.. and i am kind of relyihng on the leap of faith concept so that takes the pressure off a bit, in terms of well, whatever happens isnt really strictly speaking in my control anyway. As long as the decisions i make, feel as much as they can feel, the right thing to do and not majorly against the grain.

also it is true what you say about family, it must be devestating to have 'family' around but have them not available or not supportive. In a way, at least with no family round, i dont have anything to miss or wish for! i just need to get on with it and find alternative families.. like you say. i cant remember where it is written but there is somethign about a village bringing up a family, so i guess i need to tap into ways of getting more involved in my village!


Hi to Tommie and Smilingandwishing too and everyone..


excuse the rambling post... !

happy sundays..


----------



## Diesy

Hi Amittai, how's your calm   working out?  I've been trying to get a bit of that myself, not working so far.  What a nice compliment about my work...and my flower!  Thank you    Flower has wilted now, caught it in time    If only my work would bring in some money then it would be excellent for bamibinoing.  Still, there is time for it to pay it's way.
Not long now as GG says, the 12th, and we've already found October!    
xx


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## Diesy

Hello Peeps 

...and another thing, I'm sick! Have vomit bug that is best buddies with a headache. In bed with the choc digestives but think they are wasted on me. I should maybe be in bed with Alka Seltzer, wonder if he's fit, sorry it's the bug talking!

But how is everyone? Amittai, thanks for the lovely emails  I'm still doing the happy dance that you liked my work  GG, how's your little guy? And Minnie, your little girl. Wish I could get to the Bicester meetup but checked out prices, it was in the hundreds, but would love to see you guys.

Does anyone have a cure for numb? Apart from going to live in the cupboard for 6 months? I'm trying to look from above at the big picture, or tricking myself into asking what the problems are and then removing them in the future. I'm also trying to look positively at the whole thing but I am surrounded by negativity, from family and friends and general society saying oh it's going to be so hard. But you know life is hard, living by yourself is hard. It's like you were saying Minnie, single people are used to being independent. I think that's probably the strongest argument - we aren't used to having someone around to do stuff for us so it's not as big a leap when we have a little person to look after as those who have a partner doing the same. Is that how it feels once you have babykins?

Wow, for someone who is numb I really hit a roll there! Thanks for listening  xx

PS It's hard because I feel like no-one wants this baby except me. My family don't want it and I know what they are like about my hound, who everyone else in the world loves. They are all going on a family trip to visit relatives and I couldn't go because the cost of flights and accommodation would be too much. I'm upset that they didn't want to help me out because my dad will be 80 this year and there won't be any more family hols. My sisters, BIL's, dad and nephew are all going to visit my aunt and uncle and for years this is the thing they will talk about and remember with my dad. They blame me for everything because I'm not earning, they made no effort to help cover the apartment or whatever price for me. They are just ******** to me since my mum has gone, well not my dad. Oops, didn't really mean to get all my laundry out there. What a mess.


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## Betty-Boo

Not been on here in ages!!!  Massive   to everyone!


Diesy     what helped me overcome the numbness was good old Prozac!  Has done me the world of good and helped with my hormonal temperament and dealing with last year.  Took a wile but things are so much clearer now.

Hey - its you who wants this baby honey - yes its easier with support - but you just never know what they'd feel once baby is here.  Families do surprise us sometimes.   

Right - best get back to packing for wee job change ... Take care everyone 
Tis x


----------



## suitcase of dreams

diesy
I have a feeling thetis may be right here, perhaps now is the time to get some help with the numbness to get you through and back on a more even keel? it may be that a short course of anti-depressants  might just do the trick 
for me personally it was counselling and time (that old chestnut) that got me through my numbness (post miscarriage) and I am truly blessed to have a supportive family. it makes me so sad and angry when others don't get support from their families   
hang in there, spend time with the positive people in your life (us, your friends etc) and don't listen to the negativity. yes, life is hard, yes having children on your own is hard - but so is having children with a partner. in some ways we have it easier, no arguments over who does what, no one else to resent or worry about or compromise with   
there are pros and cons to everything. stay true to what you want, at the end of the day it's your life and you are the one who is going to be looking back - make sure you're not looking back feeling sad about the things you didn't do   
sending positive vibes   
Suitcase
x


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## greatgazza

Diesy    i have to say i think anti-depressants helped me too, once i found the right one and i also think i would have gone under without counselling. i remember that 'numb' place and it's absolutely horrible, crying and feeling really sad is actually better than feeling numb although you would think numb would be better.

i really empathise on the family front too    i was really saddened after my mum died (dad already dead) at how little they were there for me the first christmas after she died when i was travelling down to my rock bottom. it does seem a shame to miss such a family event, do you think there is any way you could ask them to chip in to help you out and you'll pay them back when you're back on your feet? it really might not have crossed their minds to try and help you financially, sometimes we feel aggrieved with someone but they genuinely haven't thought that we need help and we do have to think about trying to be direct and perhaps actually asking for help (something i'm really not good at but then find myself upset with people but they never actually knew and would have helped out if they'd known/i'd asked them).

it is also really tough if they don't seem supportive of our plans, i had a big argument with my eldest brother when he found out what i was planning on doing as he thought it was selfish and children should have two parents etc i stood up for myself for once and gave as good as i got and we got over it and when he met the little man a few months ago he was totally smitten.  As Thetis says, this baby is for you and nobody else so don't be swayed if it's what you really want cos as suity says please make sure you're not looking back with regret and sadness   

and you only have to have a read of the relationship board on here to see how lucky we are in many ways and when i'm feeling lonely it's not difficult to remind myself that most of the time i'm actually glad i'm doing this on my own.

keep going love, and try and call on friends and other supportive and positive people to help you along the way   

GGx


----------



## Tommi

Just wanted to send you some hugs Diesy      
Sorry I'm rushing... but just wanted to say hang on in there      
Txx


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## Diesy

Thanks      My FF family have a lot more value than the real ones, much as it hurts me to think that.

Cut my post there, panicked from over sharing and making everyone depressed or sounding self pitying.  More later xxx


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## greatgazza

Diesy you are ANYTHING but self-pitying, you remain so positive and upbeat when you are having a really tough time i couldn't do that in your situation, i'm a right moaner!! and it's good to share so please don't get embarrassed by that, that's what were here for, if you bottle things up they find a way out which is usually worse than sharing the load in the first place.

GGx


----------



## Amittai

Hiya Diesey, i also wanted to say hi and hang in there.. that is so tough to deal with a family situation like that, yow.. i would really want to eat a chocolate digestive biscuit entire tree and all sorts.
I'm sad for you Diesey sunflower chick.. i wish FF could design a magic wand for (good not bad) magic potions, spells, cures, flying broomsticks for getting to NB family parties and FF get togethers for single mommies, and anything else required to make life a little bit less hard at times when it aint meant to be. Like GG says, its better to say stuff, and you are not negative. 
i for one - as you know - am an advocate for saying it like it is - and that is feelings too - else its not reality is it, and anywayz it helps a lot of people to hear how people cope with things.
I love what everyone is saying at the moment, ok, i dont love that people have had sadness and difficulty, but i love it that people can talk about that stuff and relate and it helps with identification.
If i didtn have these posts to read, i think i would be in a very different place.. and that includes ALL the posts people write..

sending lots and lots of 

and from my favourite book in the whole world, in case it helps a little bit:

_"Goodbye, said the fox. And now here is my secret, a very simple secret. It is only with the heart that one can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye."
The Little Prince _

and plus - another little thing about grown ups who dont really understand sometimes about the importance of bambino's to people who are not entirely according to the rule book of life:

_"Grown-ups love figures. When you tell them that you have made a new friend, they never ask you any questions about essentail matters. They never say to you, "What does his voice sound like? What games does he love best? Does he collect butterflies?" Instead, they demand: "How old is he? How many brothers has he? How much does he weigh? How much money does his father make?" Only from these figures do they think they have learned anything about him."_

see??



ciao ciao, and here's to much much much


----------



## Diesy

Ah GG, you are probably spot on with that one! Just wasn't sure about sticking it on t'internet and it being there for all to see. I guess that got something to do with these things not being acknowledged properly before, got that from the last counsellor I saw.

I was looking for a wee notebook to do some journalling over the next few weeks, because I'm going friggin crazy! Amittai I'm surprised I didn't come across my copy of The Little Prince, thanks for those good quotes, very much liked the figures.  I feel so much better after everyone's replies today, and texts Tommi, it has really helped I feel so much brighter now! So I was looking for a notebook and I found a copy of the goodbye note I wrote my mum, she was cremated with it. I was reading it in abstract, I didn't see the dear mum bit - "I wish that when I have children that they get your good looks and enthusiasm for life." That was 9 years ago. (Lol me with the good looks bit, at least I didn't say "your excellent spelling".) There was also a bit about finishing my book, that's been going on a while, not the same book though.  Anyways, I just wanted to share that bit of the note, I'm thinking about it.

On GG's recommendation here's an edit of the post I deleted. 
----I had a bad spell about 16 years ago, I was only 26 when it started and that kind of stuff forms you. Anyways, I'm okay, I cope/coped kinda okay, am as healed as I'm going to be. I do my arty stuff which is the thing that has saved me every time, blessed to have that output. It's not that I feel depressed, although the negative thoughts are pretty bad but I couldn't take anything that might break my creative outputs because without that there would be no me left.

I should know better than most how precious life is and how you need to make the most of it!


----------



## Tommi

Oh Amittai, I love that book! I'm going to have to read it again now! Loved the quotes. I guess that's why we feel different from others sometimes. Life has a different shape for us.

   Diesy.

Txx


----------



## greatgazza

think i'm gonna have to get the little prince,never read it  

Diesy how lovely that you wrote a goodbye note for your mum.  That never occurred to me  i would have liked to have done that.  i'm glad you have your creative output, when i was in the grip of 'numbness' or 'depression' i couldn't enjoy anything so it's good that you have something that motivates and inspires you. And just remember, like you told your mum, it's 'when you have children' not 'if'.  it can happen for you lovely, you just need to find the right path through the fog   

Amittai hope you're doing ok and working your way through the decisions you have before you   

GGx


----------



## Hbkmorris

Hi Ladies, I wonder if I can join you please. 

I've read back a few pages and OH my there's alot to keep up with    It feels so good to actually join a thread that's for me and only me (with all you there to of course!) I'd like to send my love and thoughts to those that are in need with lots of     to those of you who need     I was told to always believe in your dreams as believing them makes them come true. I tried to read the book called The Wish and got totally confused by page 20 but I grasped the meaning and from now on shall try to involve it into my everyday. 

I've had all my previous tx with my ex partner (last cycle him being my known donor) anyhow i'm now faced with going it alone which is so uplifting and I feel i'm in control for the first time in years and my god it feels good. After all the BFN's I decided I needed to change something BIG TIME and that was me, my life and my future wishes to become a mommy. 

So to start a fresh i've moved clinics (to a much better one) and i'm just waiting for me donor sperm allocation to be available for me, which isn't going to be long but I have decided to wait till January as it'll be a fresh start, new clinic and a new year so i'm full of beans and happy to start 2014. 

I do have a little question if I may, I am in the midlands and I was wondering if any of you have sourced your Menopur cheaper that your clinic? At the mo the cheapest I can find is Asda at £17.00 per vial and I need 6 amps a day which is a huge difference to my £12.50 per vial I used to pay at my old NHS hospital. The IVF journey has already cost me £16,500 and with this extra cost of drugs and tx i'll be pushing £22,000 so every little bit I can save can help me pay for Intralipids. 

Sorry my post has been all about me, i'm just bowled over by being able to post on a thread that can help me personally and hopefully make new friends. 

Thank you ladies xxx


----------



## Diesy

Hi HBK, here's to your fresh start!  That's supposed to be delicate little chinking champagne glasses  You might also like the IVF thread which has fallen off the front page.

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=276408.880

I know Asda do price matching, first hand experience of that one, I got menopur from Ali's chemist, they are the same price as fertility2u.com which has the cheapest drugs I know of. That's the same price you are quoting, just checked, so not much use. There is a cheap drugs thread from the main board, have you tried there too?

Welcome to the singles board! (More delicate chinking!)


----------



## Hbkmorris

Thank you Diesy

HA HA I like the chinking champs glasses thank you   . I shall have a look at the IVF thread as I've only looked at the ICSI thread in the past so thank you for that info. 

Arrrh so Asda are pretty cheap then in the scheme of things which is interesting, I feel I want to get the drugs now in preperation as i'm worried Asda will put it up! May ask my consultant what she thinks. When you say look on the main board are you talking about IVF main board/thread? 

Hee hee forget the singles for a while think I might need a few stiff ones this week just to help me unwind after this manic week at work so far!!    
xxx


----------



## Diesy

I'm feeling rather tipsy after that welcome toast, more people should join up!  The link I sent you is for the singles doing IVF.  I meant the main board for everyone regarding drug prices.  Recently I phoned Asda and I was quoted a higher rate for Gonal f which they promptly lowered to cost when I explained it was cheaper elsewhere.  Currently I'm in a situation which means, due to costs, I may not be able to go ahead at all, it's really pants.  How realieved am I that I never took to smoking, drinking and Class A's - phew!  Need a wee premium bond pronto!!!  It's about time, I haven't won anything in AGES! xox


----------



## Diesy

Oh GG, I meant to say, I actually thought I'd written this, but only in my head  It was lovely finding the note to my mum. I was going to say it's funny how these things turn up but in my household filing is something that will take a lifetime of practice! I wrote a copy of it to keep, I should probably put a wee memory box together, I wrote it on a postcard of this picture, see below, which is very Little Prince to me.

http://postfiles8.naver.net/20120625_103/kmozzart_1340582700147CxhKF_JPEG/Sofies_Welt.jpg?type=w3

You could still write a note to your mum, and your dad.  You could torch it and fling it to the four winds, or those lantern things are also good. xox

/links


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## Hbkmorris

Ha ha well I've come up trumps with drugs.. Central Homecare have come to my rescue and my cons is happy to prescribe me an early prescription as its such a good deal. 

I shall go onto the singles IVF thread shortly. 

Thank you so very much for your warm welcome x


----------



## greatgazza

thanks Diesy, yes i could do that xx

hbkmorris, welcome! here's the link to the drugs thread:

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=9821.1440

you might also just want to check that your drugs will defo last ok until you need them if you're getting them quite a while in advance

GGx


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## Hbkmorris

Thank you for the thread link, I've spoke to the central Homecare and they said they'll get some that lasts a year or so, so that's an added bonus!!
X


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## Diesy

Hello  It's gone very quiet on here so I might have to run buck  through here but I don't want to make grown people  or everyone else  about me  Alternatively       wake up everyone!

Amittia - how are you doing on the countdown to DD day? Lots and lots and lots and lots of     

Tommi - I'm working on a magic wand or spell for you...I wonder if I feng shui my house that would make a difference...you're only 500 miles away, bound to. You take it easy on yourself. 

hbkmorris - how's it going? We're a bit quiet right now.

GG - how's the wee dude? What's he up to today? Oops, how are you btw? 

AFM I am off to my new stand up comedy class tonight. It's really for public speaking and writing comedy, so don't worry I don't think I'm funny!  I am also writing looooong letters to all my family, this could end badly but you know, I need to be heard.  They are all off on the family holiday on Friday, worried about my dad and his heart condition with jet lag and a long flight. 

Anybody else - how are you today?


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## Amittai

heyyyyyy Diesy writer-er with pictures,  and gals, howdee!

hbkmorris  - hi cos I haven't said hi to you before, i hope you've been having good luck with drug buying..

everyone else, hello hello hope all is good in the land of singleton-ness and bambino's and thinking...

Diesy - i like the idea of writing letters, you are very brave.. it must be quite hard with the family event right on the horizon.
comedy class sounds just the medicine!

yip, so i have one more day of day job, not counting today,  then on Thurs I'm off to Brno!!! 

had my scan on Sat, and all good, and Stepan has booked me in for Friday for transfer of emby which is all safe and sound waiting and waiting peacefully , I hope!.  i hope it is excited too!!  

i can't believe it is so soon already.. today i am really excited and looking forward to it and butterflies in my tummy sort of status.. though i must admit to an entire weekend just gone of pure solid panic and severe yikes-ness.. but am now coming back down to some earthness and feeling a bit more grounded and focused. i just need to hold it together a few more days. I wish i could just feel one feeling, instead of a million, and some consitsency would help too!!  

actually, what really does help is just seeing the pictures of the little people here,  like your little one GG! and also reading the messages..

so its all good. and i must say, I now have more new admiration for gals that have done this many many times with all sorts of journeys before getting THE BFP message.. This is only my 2nd try and I'm feeling quite maxed out already !

any advise for  Thursday and Friday by any chance?    
THURS: FLY OUT
FRI:  CLINIC
SAT: BRNO/ PRAGUE
SUN: PRAGUE
MON:  RETURN TO UK

ok time to say by everbody's.  

and just to say thanks for all the postings and things..


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## Diesy

*Oooooh Amittai! You're maybe en route - very exciting! Me and the pooch are here doing this
    

Hope that spritley cheerleader isn't stamping on the fairy dust! She can be rather enthusiastic!

So, erm not quite sure what to do while away. Puppet shop sounds like a good move. I'm glad you got my memo on being a fainting delicate flower who can't lift weights or do the moonwalk. At least for the next two weeks, I'm      for longer myself. 

So in Brno, I know there is a movie theatre and people talk about a nice...Italian () for dinner. Hopefully someone that has actually been to Brno comes along with actual details. Oh, where's the lucky hot choc place? I'm not very good, am I? 

Well have a smashing time! I will be looking out for updates! Now it's time for a short commercial break.
    

XOXOX*


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## Amittai

hello Diesy and all superbly single gals,

Diesy thanks for message above - and all the pictures!
As instructed a little while ago - keep your trainers on, keep lookin-up despite certain things and stuff out of your control, and keep going, i'm rooting for you 100% always     

hbkmorris -  hows things, glad you got sorted with your drugs, looks from your sig that you are due to cycle in Jan, how are plans going? all good i hope, send news  

GG and Tommi, hi!

I guess i just wanted to share my news for like encouragement and kinship and well, i dont know, um anwayz, and that news  issssss, that i got a   yesterday!!! woot woot!!
thanks to lovely Clinic and its early dayz, but i am seriously on cloud a million and totally surprised and extatic and happy and also already onto the next phase of nervousness and worriedness, called 'early days' but its at least a more settled place to be in than i was before
Diesey i want you to be here too!!

thanks to you guys for all the time explaining your experiences and how you felt and how you got through everything, it was like gold to me, and when i was in Brno this time, going and being and coming back, i could think of that, and it really helped me have quite a good and positive time.
so thanks!!

so thats me, tadaaaa...... and I'm off home next week to the land of sunshine for 10 days, perfect timing! how awesome is that!! lucky lucky me.
and my embie/s first trip to their granny  

have good last bits of weeks everyone,  and   to tryers and thinkers


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## ♥JJ1♥

Amittari- congratulations on your BPF well done xxx


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## greatgazza

huge congrats Amittai!!

not sure if there are many other singlies around in the same boat but there is a singles waiting for a first scan thread where you can go if you're too nervous to go on the bumps thread.

GGx


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## indekiwi

Congratulations Amittai - wonderful news!!!  Enjoy all that sunshine too - what a great start for a bump in the making!!!

A-Mx


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## Tommi

Amittai - huge congratulations! What fabulous news!    
Txx


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## Hbkmorris

Oh my congrats Amittai        well done you...    For the next 9 months & thank you for your kind welcome to this thread. 

Hi Ladies, I will try and sit down tonight and go through everyone's history so that I can keep up. I've chatted to a few of you and it's great to feel part of a thread that doesn't judge you in anyway. 

I feel such a relief as all my drugs are home waiting for me to use come end December/January time. Central Homecare are just brill, cheap, prompt and Lorna is my little golden gem. So now being armed with all this pred, clexane, menopur, buserelin, gestone, folic acid i'm rarring to go although I have to say i'm not looking forward to inserting the gestone!! The needle is quite thick and large compared to the other injection needles... joy of joys! I'll be like a pin cushion with a moon face.. what a look that'll be!   

Anyhow I shall keep you all posted and I shall sit down tonight and go through all your posts. 

Lots of Love xxx


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## Amittai

Thanks so much GG, Indi, Tommi, HB, JJ1

I am so happy and thrilled and excited.
I hope you are all doing good,

GG - thanks a lot for the pointer about the waiting for first scan thread, I've book marked it and will read it tonight, cool beans 

Tomi - looks like you are onto another round soon, for a sib? awesome awesome, good luck, i cant even imagine that right now, just shows that single mommyhood is do-able!

Inde, nice to know a fellow expat, even though we are from different parts of the southern hemisphere.. i still find it so amazing that you have THREE!

JJ1 - hope doing good, i cant work out from your sig exactly where you are cos no dates, but wherever you are sending  

hbkmorris - wow lots and lots of smarties!    must be nice having them there ready to go, where you can see them even if the needles look all scary. good you found a reliable supplier!  i must say i was terrified to do my first ivf injections, i must have watched about a million youtube video's but in the end it was much more easy peasy than i anticipated (normally in the past i have often fainted just looking at a needle!) 
Though looking at your sig, looks like you've had lots more experience than me, but just thought I'd say that I can relate.. and you'll do fine!  
i never took gestone though,  but HB, I'm sure it will be like the others, and no doubt there will be lots of people on threads who've tried it and can give advice, but good good luck and let us know how it goes, just takes one go and then you'll be on your bike and going.. pin cushion with a moon face, heehee!   (I'm sure not!!) what is the MFS clinic HB? just curious. i only ever been to the one in CZ

anywayz everyone better get back to work and thanks for the messages and happy dayzz.. lots of lurv


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## Diesy

*It's no surprise you got a bfp Amittai, I saw it in the tea leaves     with joy with you! xxxxx*


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## Hbkmorris

Hiya, MFS is short for my clinic being Midlands Fertility Services.. They have been my breath of fresh air since my multiple failure's!! This will be my 6th shot at IVF/ICSI and it has to work so were throwing everything at it such as endless medication. 

I've had loads of pin cushion times over the past year but these gestone needles are ones I've never used before and more so as its gonna go in your butt!!! Ooooh the joys 
Xxxx


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## suitcase of dreams

huge congratulations amittai    very pleased to hear your news, all the best for the coming months    
hbkmorris - gestone is daunting but do-able. I used it on most of my cycles and then for 14 weeks of pregnancy when I got my BFP - you never quite get used to the needle size but it's less painful than you might imagine!
some people swear by emla cream to numb the site before you inject. I found an ice block really helped (or bag of frozen peas if no ice block available!), also warming the gestone vial before you use it (stick it in your bra for a few minutes). Some people like to lie down to do the job (there are videos on you tube showing you how to do this) - I prefered to stand in front of a full length mirror...
anyway, you'll be just fine, good luck with it all   
Suitcase
x


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## Minnie35

HOOOOORRRRRRRAAAAAYYYYY! That's wonderful news Amittai, oh I'm so happy for you!  Well done you for going for it!


Sending lots of love x


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## Hbkmorris

Hi Minnie.. May I ask you does your MFS stand for Midlands Fertility Services or Manchester Fetility Services or something totally different? HA

Congrats to you to Miniminnie!! Bless xx


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## Minnie35

MFS was Manchester Fertility Service.  I started my treatments while I was living up in Leeds, and went over to Manchester for the treatments.  I thought they were really lovely at MFS - I left them just because I moved back to London to be near my mum and sister.  But I'd have happily stayed with them had I still been living in Yorkshire x


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## Amittai

hiya  today all   

Diesey artist lady, Suitcase, Minnie, and HB too thank you so much for messages, i am still totally living in cloud land, thank you thankyou! 

HB, ah ok makes sense now about clinic, cool and glad you got a saviour of knowledge to help out with gestone tips, woot woot! you are very brave, but as suitcase says, you'll be just fine, and cors you will, girl power   send messages when you start, finish, whenever. wow it must really feel as if you've had a barage of meds, but lets hope this time is the time  

Minnie congrats on your little one from April, this will be her (I think?) first christmas coming up, how awesome,   how are you doing now after 6 months of having little person in your life? is it completely different to what you thought, or sort of how you imagined?  are you getting sleep yet? 

Diesy careful you might get hired to read more tealeaves!!     

HB - keep us posted!


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## Tommi

Amittai - I'm still trying for number 1 although I could have had a little tribe in the time it's taking! 

Diesy - go and make yourself a cup of tea will you??!    What do the leaves have to say?!

Txx


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## Amittai

oh goodness Tommi, i silli-ly read your sig too fast and saw 'Nov - VF/ICSI #2 planned' and jumped to conclusion of tribe member number 2, sorry!  i dont know what my brain did there! so are you all ready for November? its seriously just around the corner, lets hope tribe is waiting in the isles right this minute putting on their boots, fetching their drums and trumpets ready to land!
But respect for the 'tribe' response   , i certainly wish one on you Tommi, soon,   now Diesy hows the tea drinking going??   and howz you today?

TGIF and happy dayz to everyone else to..


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## Minnie35

Hello, just a quickie to reply to you Amittai!


Yes, 6 months on it's as wonderful as ever having Mm in my life, and I'm writing now with a poorly chest-infected baby and a cold for myself  of the evil face-and-skin-ache variety, so we're having to keep away from other people and are generally miserable (I've always been one who needs to have company each day to stay happy) - so if I can write that it's wonderful now, that's jolly good news for the likes of you expectant mums! Oh and no, sleep's still rubbish. Once again, it's the difference between being knackered, stretched and stressed and being unhappy. That's the thing I wish I'd known before I'd embarked on all this TTC malarkey, because it would've got rid of all my reservations and fears in one go!


got to rush while Mm is asleep so I haven't got time to check whether this makes sense or is insensitive to anyone - I hope it's not, I know I'm a very lucky lady to have my wee daughter.


Hello to everyone, 


Minnie x


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## Amittai

Hiya Minnie and poorly little one,
Thanks so much for that generous email, it is lovely to hear such a  confirming message, even now when you are dealing with a unwell little person (AND unwell mommy-self) so probably on an uphill section. I hope you both get better soon and at least manage to get a bit of sleep tonight.
And perhaps a visitor some time on the weekend to just give you some soul energy juice!
I especially like what you say about all the reservations and fears being not the same in real life once you little person arrived, it makes me think that I musnt take all my worries and concerns tooo seriously,.
Thanks Minnie! and get better soon..


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## flutter6y

Hello everyone

New to this thread and pretty new to the forum altogether. Popped inthe chat room a few times. 

Please read my profile below to see my story. I'm just very excited because today I decided I'm as ready as I am ever going to be, so I made the call to say I'd like to start Donor IUI asap please!

Woo - i did it. Appt on 8th for paperwork, donor specification and paying i presume?  Now need to read up on what medicated IUI actually might involve. Where does it normally start in the cycle and how long do people generally take the drugs before ovulation?

ooh now i'm on this thread I'll have a closer look at who else is. Looking forward to sharing and mutually supporting you all

all the very best of luck to you x


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## Hbkmorris

Hello Flutter

I've not long joined the thread to so I can confirm your in good hands here. 

I see you to tried with ex and now have gone it alone... Me to.. Feels good doesn't it? We have full control now and that's the bit I like as this is all about me now. 

I've never done IUI as by tubes are blocked but I'm sure someone will be along soon to help you. 

Morning to everyone else, hope your all ok and not tooooo cold!!! Brrrrhh 

Xxxxx


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## Amittai

Hello HB and Flutter!

Flutter welcome  and that is so exciting about your plans, holding thumbs for you, I also never did IUI, but from what i read, it seems the most simple and easiest and given that you are under 40, then the odds i think must be good for you, so that is awesome, perfect timing!
Same as HB i am also not too ofey with tubes but you should get some advice help soon, I am pretty sure its quite common.
also although i dont have the ex situation, i can concur wtih what HB says, and i think it is very empowering in many ways to do this journey the way we do, and already i feel as if i am becoming a little bit stronger in myself each day. I find that having a purpose outside myself, that has a lot of meaning for me, seems to be what spurs me on a lot of the time.

For the IUI, i think the meds depends very much on the individual, but from what i can gather you take drugs quite early on in your cycle, to make yourself grow more follicles and so hopefully more eggs, and then a triggor shot to force you to ovulate within a certain window, and then they do the IUI and then touch wood the little swimmers find an egg or two, and there you go a for away! (though I am probably stating the 0bvious that you already know.. but just in case). That is very simply put but there is a whole lot of threads on it which might help - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=7.0
also there is a site I found recently which has tons of really great podcasts about all sorts to do with infertility, adoption the donor topic.
Here is one on medicated IUI, which might be of interrest, and its from 2012, so quite current, and you might find some more that are of interrest.. its quite addictive!
See the Jan 25 Podcast: http://www.creatingafamily.org/radioshow/625.html

good luck and keep us updated!

Hiya Minnie and LO, hope you guys are getting better 



/links


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## greatgazza

welcome all newbies!!

flutter there's a single women having iui thread here: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=243822.530

as for going it alone, i occasionally get lonely but pretty much the majority of the time i'm so glad i've done it on my own. especially when i read any of the relationship threads on here and awful break ups or lousy partners.... it's easy to fantasise about these 'perfect' relationships but there's no guarantee that any of the other halves are any help at all or even worse a hindrance....

GGx


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## flutter6y

Hello HB, Amit and GG

thank you so much for the welcome. I have checked out those links and will have a listen to the IUI podcast.  and might try on the IUI specific thread as well.  Its hard to know where to go wtih so many threads.  

It is still feeling a bit daunting going it alone, but I do see the potential significant advantages! I have been struggling to come to terms with being single a bit, having rarely allowed myself to be so for long through adulthood.  But it is helping me knowing I have a very good reason to steer away from men for now.  I realised that starting any new relationship, at this point in my life, would surely be doomed when I want to become a mum so badly.  Feeling really positive since I made that call anyway and keenly await my next appointment. 

take care x


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## Diesy

Hello Flutter, good to see you here and wishing luck with the up coming adventure.  

Minnie, I hope you are better   both better   

Lots of posts since I was last here,    I've not been very well after all my drugs last week, still feeling it    My body does not like getting messed around with  
Amittai, another little   for you.  Artist girl is broke girl.
This is what I look like   flippin f-f-freezing up here! xox everybody


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## Fraggles

Hi Just popping on and saying welcome to all the newbies. Have to agree with MM. I found it daunting at first getting to grips with everything IVF and accepting that I was doing it alone. Despite less sleep, the challenges of going it alone I have to say it is all worth it and I congratulating you for deciding to join our merry band of singles. Good luck on your journeys and I look forward to following your progress. The support here is great so any questions ask away. xx


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## smilingandwishing

Hi,

Like Fraggles, just popping on line to say hello, welcome and good luck. Flutter6y - feeling daunted is absolutely what most people feel as they try tomake the decision.  And as for the men bit - I make you right.  I found it so hard to accept goingalone at first and I had a last ditch attempt at another ( wrong-man-doomed) relationship. The upshot was a two year delay in doing what I knew in my heart was the right thing, whilst I tried desperately to make it work. I don't regret it because I think I had to go through it but just as Fraggles says - despite the tiredness and doing it alone not ebing the easiest thing I am so glad I made the choice.

I wish you and everyone else starting on this journey the very, very best.

Smiling xx


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## Amittai

Hello everyone,  

Just saying hi again, gotta keep our thread alive and kicking innit?  

Flutter6y - how did your paper work app go? do you have a plan yet? how are you feeling about it all now?

Minnie35 - i guess your little one must be wayy over unwellness from Oct by now, hope you're coping ok with the onset of winter, coming from Africa I am always amazed by all these sleeping bags and little portable kind of snuggly houses that little people get pushed around in, in the UK to keep warm!

Tommi - do you have new plans yet or still in the pipeline? are you still planning on Greece?

Fraggles, Smilingandwishing, greatgazza, indekiwi, Diesy,  suitcase of  dreams, greetings too,


And little update from me, I had my first scan yesterday, and I am apparently 7 weeks, 4 days! little person is 14mm and i could see the heartbeat loud and strong!! it was totally amazing, i couldn't believe it, i am now starting to creep out of my little land of semi-denial, but still early days, but main thing, looking positive and so far so good! the kind hospital is also giving me another scan in 3 weeks time, so  I feel very lucky indeed
Also had a fantastic 10 days in South Africa, so great to see my family, and sunshine!!  and fell totally in love with my little sisters 2 kiddies (2 and 3 years) who i met for the first time, and that was lovely and perfect timing, and they will be the best long distance cousins for sure!

so anywayz, that's all folks, hope you all have good weekends and a grand lead up to christmas!


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## Tommi

Fab news Ammitai! That's really great  

Yes, I'll be going to Serum in the new year. Starting to get very excited about it!

Txx


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## Amittai

Hi Tommi, thanks! and awesome news from you, Jan is just just around the corner, keep us updated!!
good way to start the year, I'll say!


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## indekiwi

Amittai, glad you had a wonderful scan experience!    (You should start posting on the bumps thread too - there are quite a few posting at the moment so plenty of company.)  I'm completely jealous of your trip out to South Africa - sounds like you had an amazing time.  


Hi Tommi, I'll be watching out for your news and cheering you on from the sidelines.   


A-Mx


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## Sharry

New thread 

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=297535.0


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