# I'm 48. Am I the oldest? Is there any hope?!



## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

DH is 36 and he (and his little swimmers) are fine. We tried about 8 years ago to conceive with my eggs to find that I was going through early menopause. We were SO put off by the negative reaction of the doctor at UCH that we backed away from the medical profession and tried all the other things: acupuncture, nutrition, chinese herbs... etc. My periods did come back, but with no success. Then we decided to give up and do with our lives some things that we wouldn't have been able to do so easily if we'd had children! (Live in other countries and travel a lot.) But we never managed to let go of the children idea completely.
So.... now we're going to try DEIVF. We have our first appointment at CRM on 22nd Jan, and we've been reading lots of posts on FF and we've learnt a lot. 
We're at the beginning of a path. We've no idea where it's going and we don't have a map! It's very helpful that there are so many others up ahead of us, whose experience we can learn from. I felt a bit odd just reading other people's posts without introducing myself. 
I don't think I've chosen a very good name. Upo is supposed to stand for 'upbeat, positive and optimistic'. But when I picked it I didn't know about PUPO!
Thank you all for being here.
upo x


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## Orange Smartie (Dec 30, 2007)

Hi upo

Glad you have found FF!  Hopefully you will go from upo to PUPO!

You are definately not the oldest FF'er on the site....I know of one lady currently expecting through donor eggs who is older than you. So yes, there is hope. 

xxx


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## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

Thank you so much for your response! I have been trying not to feel as though we'll just be chucking several thousand pounds (that we can't really afford!) down the drain. 
I don't really know how this site works yet, and am trying to figure it all out. So much you can do! I'm wanting to send you some positive energy for your upcoming DEIVF, so I hope the little smiley thing works. If not, I'm sending the positive energy anyway!
I'm also going to try to get PUPO soon!
upo x


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## Rowan22 (Dec 29, 2008)

Hi Upo!

I don't think you're too old at all. I'm sure there was a lady on one of the boards who conceived in her fifties with donor eggs and she now has triplets! You probably have a more sensible approach than me. I'm trying to conceive with my own eggs and I'm 47 this month (doesn't this business make you hate birthdays?! I keep wishing I could knock ten years off my age!)
We don't have the few thousand pounds, unfortunately, especially as we're hoping we might actually be able to buy a house this year, if someone will give us a mortgage, so we can't afford any treatment and I doubt if we'd get any on the NHS. 
I would say, go for it! You should be fine. And I've found lots of help and advice on this forum.

Rowan


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## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

Hi Rowan
If there was a chance of conceiving with my eggs, we'd be going for it, but as I was told they'd had it about 8 years ago, there's really none. I hope you're successful. I'm just telling myself that at least, if we do have a child, it won't have migraines and/or hayfever! 
I've wondered about the migraines, in fact, and whether they might be a problem. Migraines and hormones don't go well together. It's one of the questions I have on my list for CRM.
We don't actually have the few thousand pounds either, but are borrowing it. Might not be very wise, but we can't wait. 
I wish you LOADS of luck and I'm trying to get some of that positive energy into this message to send to you.
  
upo x


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## Jo (Mar 22, 2002)

Hi Welcome to FF 

Why don't you come and join the lovely ladies here  

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=162.0

Love Jo
x x x


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## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

Thank you, Jo! 

I've been browsing through the threads and have already learnt a lot, and found lots of people whose situation is more like mine.

upo x


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## Wraakgodin (Jun 17, 2006)

Hi "soon to be PUPO Upo"! 

Welcome to FF!! This is a great website for support, information, laughter and friendship, it has kept me (relatively!) sane though all my treatment.

I have been marked down as unexplained and have had 5 failed IUI's, we will be moving to IVF in a couple of months, so I don't know much about donor eggs, but here a link to that section of the site CLICK HERE

For A rough guide to IVF CLICK HERE

IVF General CLICK HERE

I see Jo has already given you a link to the over 40s thread, I am sure you will find help and inspirational stories there.

I would also recommend the "what every new member needs to know" thread CLICK HERE

And for a bit of fun there is always the the general chit chat / jokes / hobbies area CLICK HERE

You can also chat live in our excellent chat room. We have a newbie night in the chat room every week (*Wednesday at 8pm*) where you can meet other new members and a few more experienced (I won't use the term "old"!) members will be there to answer any questions you have about the site.  CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT 

There are also Location boards, you can search for your home town and chat to others in your area, who also might be using the same clinic CLICK HERE

Please feel free to ask more questions here, or on any other part of the site, there will be wonderful helpful people there to give you lots of support, information and  if you need it, we are all on this journey together (don't worry, none of us have maps, some of us don't even have compasses!)

I hope your appointment goes well next Thursday!

Sue


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## annacameron (Dec 16, 2008)

i'd get your AMH done at lister (53 pounds) to check you cannot use own eggs. UCH are very negative on older women and someone recently got a bfp at lsiter aged i think 46. own eggs. only 1 embryo to transfer.  fabby no?


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## IVF Twin Mummy (Nov 26, 2008)

Hello and welcome to FF.

Wising you lots of luck on your journey  .

Love
Lou
xxx


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## Rowan22 (Dec 29, 2008)

Hi Upo,

Thank you for your positive thoughts coming my way, much appreciated!
I get migraines, too and I know what you mean, there are lots of nasty genes in my family which I wouldn't want to inflict on a poor child but I suppose that's the case in all families. 
I have thought of borrowing the money, too but I don't think my DH would agree with trying donor eggs. He wasn't very keen on the idea of adoption. 
If nothing happens soon, I might start arguing!
I wish you all the luck in the world.    

Rowanx


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## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

Hi Rowan,

Nice to hear back from you. My DH was also not too keen on DE a while back. Not sure what changed his mind. It wasn't me! Maybe enjoying the company of our little neice so much and us knowing that my eggs have been omelettes for a good long while already. He's also said that adoption would be OK. We're quite happy to do that, it's just the process that's off-putting. 

The money issue is a major one. As ever! We'll see what happens. Now we're saying we'll only try once. You can pull me up on this one later if we change our minds!

So glad he  positive energy worked. I'm hoping it really does work for you out there in the real world, not just here!    I'm still trying to work out how to get my signature to work. We are in Italy at the moment with the slowest 'broadband' connection ever, maybe it's that. I tried to join the chat room yesterday and it couldn't cope. Actually I couldn't cope either! There's ancient for you.

 upo x


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## upo (Jan 9, 2009)

Hi Anna,

That's interesting what you say about the Lister. And about UCH. Nearly put us off for ever!

I don't think we're going to try it though. I've 'known' for about 8 years that my eggs are no good, so I've accepted it and am quite content with the DE idea. We can really only afford one go. Actually we can't really afford that! So I'd rather just go for the process most likely to work. 

I wish TONS of luck to everyone trying with their own eggs. I somehow think it's more gruelling, maybe. I might change my mind about that once we're underway!    

Hi Lou too!

Thank you for your kind words and the positive energy. Every little helps!    

upo x


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## annacameron (Dec 16, 2008)

upo, good name by the way. 

best of luck to you. 

it wld be nice to do a treatment with eg 60 or 70 pc success rate as opposed to my usual 15/20! 

fingers crossed, 

Anna xx


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