# Pregnancy and Parenting After Infertility - Donor Recipients - Part 21



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Happy chatting ladies


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Please post any additions/changes and I will edit the page.......

Name                              DS/DE/Both            EDD or Birthday                Flavour/Name/Weight

ceci.bee                          DS ICSI                  EDD 11/04/11                    Joshua 6lbs 4oz

juju81                              DS IUI                    born 17/03/10                  Noah  Alfie  6lb 0.5oz

HellyS                              DS IVF                    born 28/10/08                  Emily    4lb 8oz  

Ju2006                            DS IVF                      born 29/09/07                  Girl        8lbs 2.5oz
                                                                      born  07/08/10                  Girl          9lb 8.5oz 

teresal                            DS IVF                    born 06/08/10                  Meredith Emma  6lb

Mighty Mini                      DS IVF                    born 05/07/10                  Lucas  Edward    6lb 7oz

pinkcat                            DS  IVF                  born 03/07/10                  Joshua  8lb 5oz 

Fizzypop                          DS FET                  EDD 29/08/11                      

carrie lou                          DS IUI                    EDD 26/05/11                      Zachary Stephen 7lb 7oz 

pippilongstockings            DS  IUI                    born 09/10/07                    Luke      7lb 11oz
                                                                        born 30/04/10                    Zachary 7lb 10oz

ALF                                  DS  FET                    born  May 08                      Girl    9lb 5.5oz

margesimpson                DS IUI                    born  June  2010                Boy 8lb 2oz

snoopygirl79                    DS  ICSI                  born 05/05/09                  Maisie  5lb 8oz  and
                                                                                                                    Chloe    4lb 13oz

Hopeful Hazel                  DS ICSI                    born 21/06/11                  Charley 7lbs 14oz                    

Chrispx                            DS IUI                    born 21/01/11                    Girl 5lb 10oz 

Northernmonkey              DS IUI                    born 28/04/07                    Girl 7lb 14oz
                                                                      born 19/04/10                    Girl 8 lb 140z

Paws 18                          DS IUI                    born 17/03/10                    Boy 7lbs.  

Suze                                DS ICSI                  born 19/12/09                    Libby Pauline 6lb

Speeder                            DS IUI                    born Sep 09                        Little Speeder - Girl
                                      Natural                    born Dec 11                          Little Speeder - Girl 8 lb 5 oz

JanaH                              DS IVF                    born 25/05/11                    Joseph 8lbs 2oz

Sweetdreams73              DIVF                      born 18/08/11                      ID twins Matthew 3lbs 6oz
                                                                                                                                  Daniel 2lbs 13oz 

Amandaloo                      DIVF                      born 04/07/11                      Noah 7lbs 13oz


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## Ju2006

Mini - think I've spent too much time on **.......meant bookmarking! LOL


Note to self ......go to bed !! Nite


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## Lindz

Hi hazel. Please can you add me?
DS IUI twins DS- 5.5lbs DD- 6lbs Dec 2010

Have a good weekend everyone. Mini   hope yoi're feeling ok and have things to try and distract you til your scan xx


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## hakunamatata

mini lots of good wishes coming your way for your scan xxxxxxx


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## Fizzypop

Mini fingers crossed for good news ASAP xxx


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## JanaH

Mini, hope you get good news at your scan on Tuesday.  


Hope everyone else is doing well, I haven't posted in a long time.


Joseph's got his first teeth coming through after loads of sleepless nights...  He loves his food more than the milk, his already on 3 meals a day.  We are going to South Africa for 6 weeks in the beginning of December, I'm dreading the flight.  I took him to the clinic a few weeks ago, I must admit it was a bit emotional to the think thats where his journey started. 


Have to run he wants his lunch.


Have a good weekend ladies xxx


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## hakunamatata

wow jana hes growing up fast. sounds like he's keeping you on your toes xx


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## snoopygirl79

Bookmarking


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## carrie lou

Bookmarking!


Mini wishing you all the best for your scan, not long to wait now   


Jana lucky you having 6 whole weeks away, hope the flight goes OK with little one   


Can anyone recommend a brand of reusable breast pads?  I feel like I'm going through far too many disposable ones (probably not doing the planet any favours either  ) and as I plan to BF for a while longer, think it would be a worthwhile investment


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## Spaykay

Can I be added please Hazel-

EG - DE weight 9lb A - natural mirsacle so only add if that's ok 8lb1

Kay xxx


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## speeder

just a quick bookmark


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## juju81

Bookmarking!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ds was accused of being a girl since he was 6 mths! We had to get his haircut at 11 mths


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## carrie lou

"accused"   My little bro was nearly 3 before he had his first haircut, he had curls going halfway down his back and everyone thought he was a girl


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## Saffa77

bookmarking


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## Spaykay

When DD was young everyone thought she was a boy as her ears aren't pierced (girls get their ears pierced as babies in Spain). So, I thought there'd be no probs withDS dressed in blue with no earings...but nope...he's a girl! Can't win.

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

I once took Zac out in his pram dressed entirely in blue - someone still asked me if he was a boy or a girl


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I loved Ds hair too but it got to the stage even I thought he was a girl!!   it needs a cut now but I'm leaving it a while cos he's got chicken pox. That's my excuse anyway! 

Spay has dd got her ears pierced now? I saw  twin girls about a yr old the other day and they had big hoops in and looked ridiculous


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## Spaykay

Noooooo...no earongs here!

Thank G I had a girl 1st so no need to have DS with long locks  mind u...I'm a bit obsessed withcitiing DD's hair. Shpuld be to hrr bum by now but it's chim length bOb after 2 months of no trim! Had trendy short cut for hot summer.

Kay xxx


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## chrispx

Mini- hope all ok for scan tomorrow. Fingers crossed its got your legs. 20weeks already... Wow.

Spooks- just noticed your previous post...huge congrats to you.

Carrie- sorry don't know anything about breast pads, there must be something out there.

Ceci- I read something also about them wanting to put hands in mouth when they eat but if just
His thumb could just be his way, have you tried giving him something to hold?

Pink cat- some people are just daft, my little girl was dressed in grey & pink & someone thought she was a boy.... I just ignored it, I'm sure they do it on purpose.

Spaykay- ooooh earrings in babies how painful, I can remember at 11 & having to put that awful solution on.

Hope everyone ok. Soon be Xmas.....eeeek.


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## ceci.bee

Mini hun              for tomorrow's scan hun

Carrie - I use bamboo breast pads they are brilliant and I love them (esp in the heat here not your prob), I got them from Lizzie's real nappies www. http://www.lizziesrealnappies.co.uk/index.cfm/advice/Products.Details/product_id/465/subject/bamboo_breast_pads_by_motherease Lizzie is fab and will answer all your questions and get the products out to you asap. I haven't looked back esp after i got a yeast infection from using disposables.
Janah - if you are flying with SAA make sure you tell them in advance you are bringing a baby and they will give you the bulk head seats and and a bassinet. Our flight was not full when we came out here and they gave us a four seater for the 3 of us even though we had only bought 2 tickets, and didn't charge us extra baggage for the cot and car seat etc - check in with a sympathetic person and you will be away. It is an overnight flight so he should sleep for some of it and if you can feed him at take off and landing it will minimise any pressure pain in his ears. Good luck! and enoy the holiday....
Thanks all for the thumb sucking advice I tried to give him finger food this weekend which he enjoyed playing with, and sucked with his thumb!!!  I think he only does it when he is tired or wants to think about something so I am just going to slowly try to keep it away without the battles and see where we get to. DH was away this week and being a single mum when the power is out and your baby is leaking poo all over the high chair with only a head torch is something I don't want to repeat in a hurry! He got it on his feet and then started grabbing them and then sucking his thumb - it was seriously messy!

lots of love to all
Ceci 

/links


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## Spaykay

Re breast pads...why do they never stay in place? Oooo are the bamboos washable? Mind u, I have boxes of chuck away ones.

Kay xxx


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## juju81

Pinkcat, some people   noahs about to have his 6th haircut!! It grows at lightening speed. I'm
Not a fan of long hair on boys....he doesn't have the hair for long style anyway, way to wavy and wirey


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## chrispx

Ceci- oooh that does sound messy  

Quick question. Is 9months... Well almost 10 months too late to get attached to a comforter? DD has been playing with my hair on a night to go to sleep & getting abit to reliant on it. DH has short hair & he looked after her lastweek whilst I was on a night out & she seemed very restless & he couldn't get her off to sleep until she was exhausted & same goes for when my parents had her. Making me anxious now about future night outs etc. any advice?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lay a muslin next to her or put it in her hand. They like to hold something. Persevere  with it and she should take to it. You might need to do a bit of cc with her too, to stop the hair twiddling. Ds got attached to his muslin and only last wk he's got attached to his bunny which has been in his cot since birth more or less


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Just read your post again. I would do cc with her, sounds like she can't settle herself.  Tie your hair back and don't let her near it   give her a comforter and be brave


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## carrie lou

Chrispx I would definitely try a comforter, I don't think 9/10 months is too old at all. I am still trying to get Zac attached to his, of course it doesn't help that I keep forgetting it  but I will persevere and hope he gets the idea!


Ceci ooh that sounds messy and in the dark too, you must be super mummy  Things like that make me wonder how single parents cope  Thanks very much for the recommendation, think I will go for some bamboo pads as I must have spent a small fortune on disposable ones by now.


Kay I know what you mean, my breast pads are always slipping   but I've found the best ones for staying in place are the Mothercare ones, they have a nice big adhesive bit that seems to hold them better than others.


AFM - I left Zac with a babysitter (my mum) for the first time last night  I know he's nearly 6 months but I've never really needed to leave him with anyone other than DH before. I was a little anxious even though my mum is great with him. Left him sound asleep in bed but by the time we got home 2 hours later, he was wide awake and watching TV with his granny  Oh well, I'm just glad he wasn't crying!


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## Lindz

Morning everyone!

Mini- thinking of you and hoping for good news from your scan. 

Chrispx- nope, not to old at all I read it was between 12 and 18 months that they really get attached to stuff. Both of mine have had things with them since birth but don't seem to care either way. Good luck if you try the CC. Juju and Mini made me do it   for DD in the morning and after 3 mornings of screamig we haven't got up before 6:45 for 2 weeks and she's like a different baby when she does wake, all smiles and hugs!

Well done on leaving Zac Carrie. Mine have been with my parents a few times but I'm having a nervous breakdown about going back to work. I can't even book an appointment at nursery coa I keep crying when I think about it!

As for us- does anyone else have rubbish eaters? Mine just never really seem hungry and hate lumps. They aren't too bad with finger food but its starting to get me down that I throw away nearly everything I cook. He only things they love are stage 1 jars, Ella's kitchen pouches an yoghurt. What about Mummy's yummy chicken stew?! Grrrrr! Any tips? 

X


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## speeder

Mini - thinking of you today and hope it all goes ok   

Hi Lindz - I think they can all be rubbish eaters from time to time - it's frustrating huh!  My DD is still not terrific with lumps (and she's over 2!) I think that's very common to be honest, and it's probably not helped by the fact so much baby food is completely pureed so they don't get used to lumps. If they are happy and healthy babies then they will be getting enough so I wouldn't stress.  Don't let them see you get frustrated by the fact they won't eat or apparently they associate eating with "stress".  If DD doesn't want something, I just try a couple of times and take it away (and give it to the grateful dog who must be so healthy living on flipping organic meat   ) I do keep trying DD with lumpier food and she will now gnaw on a lamb chop but I supplement that with liquidised stuff to make sure she is eating enough.  E.g. she won't touch normal spag bol but if I liquidise it with a bit of cheese she monsters it!  Hope this helps x ps one of DD's favourite foods even now is banana, avocado, a bit of natural yoghurt all liquidised into green sludge - now she's older I bung in some porridge oats and even manuka honey and probiotic powder (cos I'm a bit nuts   ).  she devours it and it's a fairly complete food for breakfast. 

Chrispx - what about one of those lovely little toys with the soft fleecy bit attached?  DD had one from about 10 months and uses it to get to sleep each night - def don't want the hair habit to carry on!!   

I'm finally getting my act together looking some stuff out  - I'm over 36 weeks so realised as usual I'm totally disorganised.  A bit of advice from those with the younger babies - what do tiny babies sleep in now as I think things have changed?  I swaddled DD with a holey blanket for the first few weeks then went for a sleeping bag.  Are there special swaddling blankets now?  Do they recommend keeping one arm out or did I imagine that?!

Hope everyone is doing OK x (thanks Hak for your message on the other thread - can't believe how far along you are now too - nearly the home straight - hope you keeping well xx)


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## juju81

Lindz, like speeder says, don't let them see ur frustrated. I have now (he's nearly 20m) just thrown his food away. If he starts throwing it I bin it and get him down. He's not gonna starve and I can't be doing with arguing with him. Noah eats can eat anything but some days he's just not really fussed. Same as us probably. His all time fave is pasta and pesto.....have u tried it? Fish fingers, jacket potato, sweet potato, the filled pasta u can get! Be careful not to just keep giving liquidized otherwise it will make it even harder for them to get used to lumps.....my friend is really struggling and her little girl has just turned 3!  Just keep going and try different foods, it certainly gets much easier the older they get....well from my experience anyway  

Mini, good luck roomie

Speeder, cripes, not long for you now. Exciting stuff!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lindz so glad we sorted you out  

Re work. Once you are back you will enjoy it. It's nice to have a change of routine and a cuppa without someone wanting your attention! They'll love nursey too. Imagine all those toys to play with!!  

Speeder re swaddle. I'd just do what u know. I am   Ds loved being swaddled. I had swaddle blankets then once he was strong enough to wriggle himself down I changed to bags. He's still in them now. 
I think the guidelines are keep 1 arm out 

Just waiting for con to get out of delivery suite for my scan. It could be a long day!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah re food. Ds didn't eat for months and I threw away nearly every meal  
They go through peaks and troughs where they just don't want to eat. 

Stop the liquidizing and let them play with the food. Don't worry if they don't eat it. Give them a yoghurt and fruit. Do they eat biscuits in the day? That will get them used to harder food. Raisins, strawberrys, banana.


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## ceci.bee

Carrie the bamboo breast pads are massive and don't slip with me when in my bra and I am a GG cup currently  they do slip in my vest at night but I am used to the occasional night leak now. they also go in the wash with the nappies and I never run out - I love them and would not look back to disposable now.

Mini                  have everything crossed for you today sweetie and hope they can reassure you

Lindz IKWYM about going back to work - I really found the idea of it much worse than the reality. A mate gave me really good advice which was in the last two weeks try to step back a bit and start whatever childcare you are planning start, but hang around a bit in the background (easier for me as have a nanny at home - for 80 quid a month!!) and resist the temptation to spend every bit of time with them - this allows them to get used to being somewhere/with someone else but reassuring that you are still around. It certainly worked for us and going back was harder for me than him. I only managed a full day (have been back 2 weeks) yesterday and that was only because my boss was heading a meeing I could not escape from, I get bad withdrawal symptoms from lunchtime on, but he is happpy and thriving so far so I try not to worry too much. You also get some you time and get to use your brain again which is quite refreshing I have found!

Re food - have no advice beyond the others esp as we are way behind you - I am just introducing finger food now and Joshi dosen't know what to do with it yet! good luck and I think as long as the babies are growing and happy they are getting enough

have put some more pics of Joshi on our blog - he weighed in today at 7 months at 9.1kg and is massive but sooooooo cute  www.gavemandjoshi.blogspot.com

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## carrie lou

Speeder - we swaddled Zac in a special swaddling blanket as it helped his sleep, they do say to keep one arm out but I never did with Zac. He is now in sleeping bag since about 5 months.  


Thanks for the advice Ceci, am going to order some bamboo pads now. I don't often leak at night anymore so don't think that will be a problem.  


Lindz - sorry can't help much on the food issue as Zac is still mostly having purees, but like the others said, don't let it stress you out - if they are growing and well, they must be getting enough one way or another  I've just started trying finger foods with Zac but most of it ended up on the carpet  Good luck with going back to work, I'm sure they will be fine at nursery though I can imagine it will be hard for you at first


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## Lindz

Thanks so much ladies. I feel better already, 

Speeder- just wish I wasn’t such a stress head. I know DH and I need to relax about it as we both got frustrated with them at tea time last night and it ruined our whole evening. When you’ve tried DD with something and she doesn’t want it do you just leave it at that? I think we might have caused problems for ourselves by trying something and when they don’t want it giving them something else. I just bought an avocado actually so might try green sludge for brekie tomorrow. 
We used miracle blankets for swaddling. They both loved them and DS only graduated to his sleeping bag when he was too big at about 6 months!! I’ve got a couple I was going to take to the charity shop if you want them. No instructions though they are probably online. Saying that, I’m sure what you did before works just as well.

Pinkcat- thanks for letting me know about Joshua, do you know what changed for him? Did you just keep trying with the lumps and eventually he’d have them. DS takes one spoonful, spits each lump back at me and then clamps his month shut while DD screams like I’m trying to poison her. So tempted to not even bother trying to cook them anything and just give them a jar that I know they’ll like to avoid the stress.

Juju- I know I need to stop blending stuff now. Just wish I’d done BLW from the start and avoided all this. Was always just a bit worried about DS as he’s still tiny so too tempting just to shovel smooth food in!  
Mini- Hope they don’t keep you waiting too long. Not sure I’ll enjoy the work bit of work but will enjoy having a cup of coffee and going to the loo without a baby hanging off me. Might also help me stop worrying about every little thing and someone else will have to feed them sometimes.

Ceci- Been looking at your pics and reading your journal. Looks amazing and Joshi is very cute (and about the size of both of mine put together!!)


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## Fizzypop

Speeder - we got given special grobag swaddling blankets but to be honest I found it just as easy using a blanket - don't know if that was because she was small though? I bought loads of sleeping bags and them found out she was too small to go in them. Doh. Need to try again but somehow just never find the time! We were never told to keep one arm out. 

Ceci - it's funny how we take certain things for granted - like light!!! When mya has a poo and I can't see it properly under the night light I turn the big light on - bet you can't wait to be able to do that!!

Carrie - someone at bf group yesterday said they use the mothercare reusable ones. 

Mini - thinking of you and hope all is ok x


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## northernmonkey

hello ladies, hope you're all well.
Lindz - don't beat yourself up wishing you'd done BLW.  I followed Annabel Karmel with dd#1 and she eats everything (loves olives, sushi for example).  i decided to do BLW with dd#2 and she's a complete fusspot - she won't even eat cereal in the morning anymore.  I just make the same meal for everyone though and if they eat it they eat it, if they don't they don't.  DD#1 used to try saying that she didn't want her tea as soon as it was put in front of her and we'd just tell her that was fine but she had to sit at the table until we'd finished and she'd always started eating after a few minutes.  I always give the girls a yoghurt or fruit for pud though and they get that regardless of whether they eat their main meal because I don't want them to think they're being punished for not eating (wouldn't give them a tasty pud like cake though   ).  Unfortunately though, dd#2 gets really grumpy if she gets hungry so I've started giving her more snacks like bread sticks and fruit between meals.  I know you might think that that'll just stop her being hungry at mealtimes but I know that if she likes what's put in front of her she'll eat it anyway (plus, I realised that if she was really hungry at mealtimes then she'd actually be too grumpy to even eat it!)  Besides, as long as I know she's eating healthily over the course of the day I don't really care at the moment whether she has 3 big meals or 10 small ones as long as she physically sits at the table with the rest of us at mealtimes.
Mini - hope your scan went ok.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Scan was fine. Legs have grown since last wk. still small but growing on its own line    She thinks it's just tiny tim! Going to check again in2 wks and check the blood flow of placenta. She looked at my thigh and said mine was too small


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## hakunamatata

mini so pleased things are looking more positive, just as you deserve it to be xx


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## carrie lou

so pleased for you Mini  just a shame you had all that extra worry for no good reason!


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## Spaykay

Oh farty pants...just lost a hige reply to Speeder on swaddling!!!! Basically, I used swaddle wraps and foiund them rubbish, prefer a blanket plus DS doesn't seem to be bothered about it...he isn't an arm flinger so doesn't need swaddling. Re arm, I thiknk yuo leave one out if you bhave a child who likes to fut a hand to their face.

Lindz - I loved going back to work as I became a real person again and got to chat and have cups of tea. DD absolutely loved and loves Nursery.

Mini - fab news!

DD went to a duvet after summer of wearing nothing in heat...but the heating has broken so she's in sleeping bag tonight....AND!!!! It's stopped her trying to escape from her bed and she's gone to bed without screaming for the 1st time since DS was born.,..back to sleeping bags it is then!!!

Kay xxx


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## ceci.bee

Mini am sooooooo pleased for you what a relief that is great - you are just outside the 'normal range' but it doesn't mean its not normal for you!! but cheeky comment about your thighs  

We used a swaddling wrap with arms outside at the begining but then used a blanket also as it was easier. Now we use sleeping bags and he loves them and sleeps really well and can wriggle as much as he likes without getting cold.

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## Lindz

Yey, great news Mini. Now the trick is not to worry and count down the days til the next scan but hopefully you aren't as   as me!

Feeling more relaxed about food now but don't know whether to go for the hard line approach of no more blending and if they eat it they eat it or just take a break and let them have what they like for a bit and hope for a pinkcat type breakthrough. Hmm, well I've done a nice smooth broccoli cheese for lunch so at least our next meal is sorted. 

Right, better wake the monsters, off to playgroup xx


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## Spaykay

EG would go weeks with no food when teething (only fruit would satisfy). Do you combine? Perhaps puree with a slice of toast on the side etc?

K x


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## speeder

Hi Lindz - yes, if DD turns her nose up at something I pretty much take it away after a couple of shots.  Mind you, DD has started saying NO to everything and so she'll say "no dinner mummy" (heartbreaking when you've just spent all that time lovingly cooking these meals!) and so I say "well just look at it then" and she does always start to eat.  But generally, no, if she definitely does not want something i don't offer her other stuff, other than yoghurt for pudding....  Re blending - why not do a mix of both?  You could blend a fruit smoothie and offer it with toast on the side.  It will all slot into place!  I think they generally eat what they need to   

Mini - brill news - just a little shortie then - I'm so pleased!  They shouldn't pass comments on your leg length - cheeky monkeys!  xx

Couldn't sleep last night - had horrible morbid thoughts about dying in labour (had big haemorrage last time, slightly scared this time to be honest) and started to cry thinking of DD without a mummy. Nuts or what!  I think I'm really really hormonal as I felt fine this morning but it was horrible at the time.

Ceci - I ended up reading your blog at 5am - and loved it - all the pictures of the amazing animals and your little boy.  It sounds a fabulous life and it actually got me back to sleep thinking nice thoughts about leopards so thank you!  Your little boy is just gorgeous.

Well girls I'm over 36 weeks now and been told baby started to engage (this didn't happen last time and I was well overdue and induced).  The bump looks like it's dropped a bit so I'm praying I don't go late this time (as I think that didn't help last time re the haemorrhage).

xx


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## Spaykay

Speeder- I was induced with both births and the 2nd was a dream!!! You WON'T have the same birth again hun...and you survived a bad one last time!

Kay xxx


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## hakunamatata

speeder i can understand your concern but what spay says makes sense xx


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## speeder

thanks girls    saw the senior midwife this morning to discuss it all (also had a third degree tear - wasn't I the lucky one   )  and thing is, after my very early miscarriage last year I bled horrendously again (needed fluids to stop my blood pressure dropping) so they think it's a weird thing going on with me and have said I'm at high risk of it happening again but at least this time we'll all be prepared.  So hopefully it can be managed. Doesn't stop me worrying to be honest but apparently c-section won't stop it happening either. 

You're right Spay though - the labour itself should be easier.  Did you go with just the gels or did you need the drip?

x


----------



## hakunamatata

im glad youre in good hands honey. lets hope this one can improve those awful memories xx


----------



## speeder

Thanks Hak    As I say to DH - the important thing was that DD arrived safely, it was just her mummy that was destroyed!  Are you keeping well? xx


----------



## carrie lou

Oh Speeder hun  I know it must have been scary, but forewarned is forearmed and I'm sure they will take steps to make sure it doesn't happen again! Good news that bump is dropping already, how exciting


----------



## hakunamatata

hi speeder, im good. been struggling with a cold etc for a bit which is hard esp sleeping when congested. but widget still kicking away which makes it all worthwhile/ spd a bit more painful this afternon but i did do some hoovering and mopping so i guess that wont have helped. still all bareable and very worth it xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - they will be aware and manage it - will they take you to theatre for the final bit just in case?

I had a c-section and a post partum haemorrhage. If the uterus does not contract fast enough where the placenta detaches does not get shut off quickly enough.


----------



## carrie lou

I had a bleed, not quite a haemorrhage - about 800mls they said, but that was scary enough.   It seems to be fairly common.


----------



## chrispx

Mini- fab news! Are you having a boy?

Speeder- think its worse when you know what to expect but everyone says no two births the same so I'm sure you will be in good hands.

Thanks for all the advice about hair etc... I have persevered lastnight & tonight with giving her a comforter which tonight I put a towel on my head & stroked the comforter through her hands & it has worked she has gone to sleep! Hooray. Hope this works.


----------



## Spaykay

Speeder - gel the 1st time but drip the 2nd as cervix was already soft.

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

well done Chrispy!    Yup having a boy!   

Speeder - ahh hun you'll be in and out within hours, I bet! I asked my MW about the next birth and c-sections etc because of the last birth    and she said they will monitor really closely because of what happened last time, so it hopefully doesn't happen again


----------



## speeder

hak - the dreaded cold - hope you on mend! I have had it too and it's rubbish we can't take much but steaming has helped me  . hope the spd eases - hoovering - mmmmm! 

Hazel - i responded ok to the drugs last haemorrhage so that is main plan just now and they will have blood ready for me too. my count was down to 56 last time so I needed 4 transfusions which I didn't want but in hindsight was right as I could barely lift my head! think it's my family to be honest - mum had similar issues - we seem to have rubbish deliveries!! 

anyway the baby has to come out one way or another! as soon as I go into labour I am straight into hospital so I am doing all I can! makes me grateful too - if I lived in a less developed country I wouldn't be here and makes you think of all these women without access to decent care - it's a brutal process childbirth! 

mini - what happened to you last time?  

well weirdly dd, who for 18 months has slept like a dream, has started not going down at nights. really niggly, like she not tired and wants attention. surely she isn't picking up on imminent arrival and unsettled?!


----------



## hakunamatata

hi girls up drinking tea, fed up of coughing and keeping dh awake. dont think i will be doing any hoovering anytime soon either xxxx


----------



## Spaykay

Speeder - ooo noooooo...DD was the same hun. They do pick up on stuff. Be strong, she will improve!!! DD is starting to get the message again that bed id bed...especially now she's trapped in a sl.eeping bag again! Do u always put her to bed? DH never does it so DD really clingy and doesn't want ,e to leave th e room...hard chops to her though, poor love!

Kay xxx


----------



## chrispx

Mini- oh how lovely, little buddies they will be. What will the age gap be? I can never work it out  

3rd night in a row with no hair...Mmm how long do you think will take? She still reached out for hair but had the towel on again


----------



## hakunamatata

crisp you clever woman xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

speeder hun can totally understand your anxiety but sounds like they are really prepared this time so should get on things quickly if you do bleed again hun       and good luck!!!!! I am so pleased my blog helped you sleep   

Mini lovely news you are having another boy am sure DS will love having a little bro around - have you told him anything yet? Do you think he will understand at all??

Chris llove your psychology and am sure if you persevere it will work        

Hakuna sorry about your cold it is grim coughing away but hope it goes soon and you get back to your glowing self   

all fine here am at work so should be working not chatting   ...............

lots of love Ceci


----------



## carrie lou

Ceci I also loved your blog, especially the pic of Joshi in his paddling pool, so cute    

Mini how are you feeling hun  

Hak hope you get over nasty cold soon  

Chrispx excellent work, hope it continues   

AFM - Zac's christening and naming ceremony is in 2 days  We are very excited


----------



## chrispx

Ceci- your blog is fab, great lifestyle. 

Carrie- are you having both? We had naming ceremony for DD was great day & service.


----------



## carrie lou

Hi Chrispx, yes we are having both  My DH is a christian and wants him christened, so we are having that on Sunday morning. Then lunch at our house and the naming ceremony in the afternoon. I've never met anybody else who had a naming ceremony before! Did you get a celebrant to do it?


----------



## speeder

Kay - both dh and I put her down - they must be quite perceptive little things to pick up on forthcoming change! glad your dd settled now. gives me hope! 

carrie - have a lovely weekend - so special for you both. x

mini - congrats on a little boy - did you have an inkling? 

crispx - well done clever lady! 

afm I have one more week at work and can't wait to finish up now. everything looks v xmassy so it makes it more real! praying the snow stays away! nite x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

speeds - no didn't have a clue


----------



## Helen3

Hi everyone,
Am I on the right thread? We have just had our first BFP after almost a decade of ttc, & this time it was with DE & immune support. Could anyone tell me how you work out how many weeks pg you are? Is it from the day of EC (25/10/11) in which case I am 4 weeks? I am booked to have my first scan on 6/12/12 which can't come a day too soon as I don't have any pg signs yet so keep wondering if I am really pg?! Two HPT & a blood test were positive.


----------



## chrispx

Congrats Helen with your BFP, my symptoms didn't kick in until 7weeks.

Speeder- not long now, whats your due date? Bet you can't wait to finish work.

Carrie- yes we had a celebrant from the humanist society do it, the script was lovely and we had four supporting adults. Good idea having two, are you having a celebrant? Bet it will be lovely.


----------



## carrie lou

Helen welcome  You count from the last day of your period to work out how many weeks you are. Many congratulations on your BFP    I didn't get symptoms until about 6 weeks or so, I know what you mean, it's kind of hard to believe it's real but your scan will be here before you know it  


Chrispx / Pinkcat we are having a humanist celebrant, she is really lovely and has made a fantastic script. We are having 5 supporting adults  which I know is a lot but I couldn't choose between them and didn't want anyone to feel left out!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

It is not the same with ivf or donor eggs where there has been hormone manipulation prior to et. You can't work it out from last bleed.
It is 14 days prior to egg collection that you count as day one of pregnancy.


----------



## carrie lou

Oh of course   Sorry Hazel, I was thinking of IUI pregnancy


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Thought you were hun! 

You must be getting very excited about tomorrow now! How will you handle it if certain unwelcome guests do turn up?


----------



## carrie lou

Don't know  I don't think they are coming though. I won't mind if they come to the church for the christening but don't want them at our house. We are very excited - just been putting up balloons


----------



## Spaykay

Helen - welcome and congratulations. Feels wonderful but scary doesn't it!!! I never had symptoms on any opf my pregnancies!

kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Congrats Helen - I never had any symptoms either    In fact i didn't test until i was 9 days late with my natural pg cos just thought i was late or menopausal!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

carrie - have a lovely day tomorrow


----------



## Spaykay

MM - I was about 6 weeks pg when I tested! Derrrrr....just thought my trousers were tight and I needed to diet. Also wondered why I was tired at 8.30

Kay xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

good luck today carrie enjoy. wish we could see some pics, you on **?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Spay   yeah I was nearly 6.


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie hope you are having a wonderful day sweetie it sounds fabulous

Helen congrats and hope you have worked out how pg you are!!! Good luck for the scan and I know it is so hard to beleive esp when you have been through so much and don't have any symptoms but try to enjoy it hun

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## chrispx

Pinkcat- oh Hun I know how you feel, don't beat yourself up about feeling like that it's normal for us ladies who have been through so much. Im sure your inlaws will treat and feel exactly the same about both grandchildren, but I would probably have those thoughts aswell.  

Carrie- hope you have had a fab day and all went smoothly.


----------



## Spaykay

pinkcat - I thought this may happen with my LO and my neiec, but no, they are both loved equally and give as much joy  to their family jointly. it's normal to feel a bit jealous, however our LOs joined us, we went through suffering and pain to get their and it's normal to wish we hadn't suffered and be jealous of those that haven't. Keep this in mind though, my B and SIL had their 1st easily, now I have 2 and their no.2 isn't coming...the tables have turned and I feel so sad for them now. we are so lucky to have our LOs

I'm very tired so excuse waffle.

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Pinkcat don't hate yourself honey, it's totally normal to feel like that  I felt the same when my best friend announced she was pg, almost without trying  Happy for her but just so gutted that it's so easy for some and so difficult for us, it's just not fair. But I honestly think we who have struggled to conceive for whatever reason, appreciate our little ones in a way that those who conceive easily really don't. I like to think the silver lining in this infertility thing is that I am a better mum because I know how lucky I am and how precious Zac is. I also have that worry about the in-laws, Zac is the only grandchild so far but what if DH's brothers have children one day and they are the favourites because they have a genetic link and Zac doesn't? But as we all know my in-laws are totally   so I wouldn't pay any attention to what they think! I'm sure your in-laws will still love Joshua just as much as ever    



Well thank you everyone for your wishes, we have had a really lovely day, the christening and naming ceremony were both beautiful  I am exhausted now though, have been on the go all day! Think it's nearly time for bed...


----------



## pheobs1

Hi everyone, can I tentatively join you please. I know lots of you from the donor thread, but there are some new faces too.
I'm just about 8 weeks pregnant with twins, via ivf with donor sperm. Feel very blessed and lucky. Had a v.early scan at 5 weeks - not much to see. Had scan Thursday and saw two beautiful heartbeats. Next scan two weeks today and have my first nhs midwife booking in appointment on Wednesday! 

MM just saw your fabulous news! How wonderful xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Welcome hun. Thought u knew about my news?


----------



## pheobs1

Maybe I thought I dreamt it! My brain has turned to mush already! Xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Welcome Pheobs  Lovely to see you over here. How are you feeling?


----------



## chrispx

Welcome pheobs....huge congrats, twins wow. Hope you are feeling well.


----------



## pheobs1

Hi MM carie and chrispx, thanks for the welcome, it feels strange finally being over onthus thread!
To be honest u e been fabulous, only feel sick when I'm hungry so keep topped up in snacks. Think I over did it this weekend, I've been out every day  and night fir one thing or another, haven't rested enough or drank enough water I think. Woke up today feeling awful with a headache and fuzzy spots in my vision. Took the day off and have slept off and on for most of the day. Think I've learned my lesson! 
Xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Oh dear Pheobs, hope you are taking care of yourself today  You have an excuse now to put your feet up and get DH to wait on you! Mine did


----------



## speeder

Hello Pheobs!  Lovely to see you on here!

Hope you continue to feel OK.  Early pregnancy is just nackering and your body soon tells you to slow down! (even though I'm 37 weeks now and quite tired, nothing compares to the dog tired feeling of the first few months - get your feet up!)  For the first 3 months I have the most boring existence of vomiting and in bed by 9pm every night....

so lovely it's twins   

Pinkcat - hope you are OK.  it's totally normal - it's reminds you of how unfair it all is    I've come to terms with it a lot by reminding myself that these other couples are "normal" and that most people do conceive quickly and so I shouldn't be upset by it IFYKWIM.  

Could flipping well kill my DH today.  He has fed the dog cooked spare rib bones (I know, I know how stupid) and the dog is vomiting.  I could really do without cleaning up dog vomit at this stage of my pg and I'm going to have to get him to the vet tomorrow but what annoys me is how my DH never listens to me (I've told him a MILLION times not to do it and he still does).  Anyone else have a know it all DH who never ever listens?  GRRRRRRR.


----------



## pheobs1

Pinkcat don't be tough on yourself, what we have been through will always be with us and it's natural for you to feel this way.  Big Hugs xxx

Speeder - think our DH's could be related! Totally something mine would do.  One thing I am quite enjoying at the moment is that letting DH do all the housework!  I do get a bit stressed at times, because he isn't doing it as often as I would like, but I really can't complain!  Watching him squirm with the cat litter is the funniest though!  He hates stuff like that and I have to do it all normally, so now it's payback!

I still feel like I am in a bubble and that this is happening to someone else!
xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pinkcat I had the same feelings when i became pg naturally as it will be in laws full bio child. Will they love it more than ds? I doubt it tho as they are not like that  luckily they look after him twice a wk so they have a good relationship with him. And have never seen him As any different.  The feelings u have are very normal. Maybe have a word with your in laws about how u are feeling?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - welcome. However he does the housework let him do it his way without complaint - all the way through my pregnancy I just had to get on with it, cat litter, dog poop and heavy lifting included. I even did a big ASDA shop the night before my c-section and two guys who I met through the antenatal classes happened to be outside chatting about their wives and new babies when I came out with a loaded trolley. They were shocked - asked me where my DH was (he was at landrover club) leaving me to do that and they helped me to the car. I took up the old nursery carpet myself at about 37 weeks pregnant and took it to the tip. Luckily there were a couple of nice blokes there who helped me out of the boot with it and into the dumper. I set up the nursery on the day before the c-section too, lifting a single mattress, making about 15 trips up the stairs with stored items and setting up a cot. Even after my c-section I was expected to just get on with it - laundry, vacuuming etc. If I don't do it no one will.


----------



## speeder

Hazel - thats not good - what does dh say when he sees you doing stuff? does he not feel guilty? I think all women feel it's just easier to do stuff ourselves and get on with it but I don't think that should extend to lifting carpets! I am still lifting heavy shopping etc and dh at least offers to do it..... 

my nite got even worse. dog has gastric bug according to vet. whilst cleaning up for fifth time tonight I slipped on dog poo in driveway and landed heavily on my knee. cue lots of blood and pain. thought I was ok - other than teary and slightly pathetic! - but have woken with horrible ankle pain. think I have strained it. crying as how the heck can I look after a toddler and not walk? let alone finish up at work! 

do you go to a and e for strained ankles? 

it's like something out of fawlty towers - slipping in poo whilst cleaning up vomit, and I cant take ibuprofen!!!


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh no speeder, sounds like the sort of thing I would do!!! Our dog had gastroenteritis when I was about 20 weeks and it was hellish for me as I struggled to get up and down and off sofa quick enough to get him out! In the end I just left patio windows open and sat under a duvet (that was April tho!)

Although am sure you will get seen quickly at a&e, do you have nhs walk in centre near you? We've used it a few times recently and it is far easier than a&e. 

Think it's time for you to slow down and take DH up on his offer!

Pheobs - welcome and massive congrats!!

My poor DH spent my pregnancy run ragged doing stuff, now I am off work and am trying to do mee than my share to help him out, he is working longer hours than ever and is still run ragged!

Anyone else have feeding problems? Mya is dropping down the centile chart (now just above 0.4th) so yesterday tried giving her 60 ml of formula in between breast feeds for two feeds and she has blooming slept even longer than ever (about 7 hours) and missed her big formula top up in the night! She did stir sometimes but I put the dummy in and this settled her. Maybe I should have fed her instead? Ended up putting her in te bed with us, I know I shouldn't have but I just couldn't help it!


----------



## hakunamatata

oh speeder my hun i feel your pain re ankle mines been 3 weeks now. but at least i can rest. my heart goes out to you sweetie.

hazel i remember you doing all that hun esp carpet and nursery, you deserve a medal. xx

another foggy am, hubby out with ruby. i do miss my morning wander. think dh likes it as he has a cupa ready on his return and we're ready for breakfast lol.

welcome phoebs, the first few weeks are certainly nerve wracking. i relaxed more after an 11 week scan but not properly till after 21 week one. all grand now i feel kicks. i cuddled up to dh last night and he could feel her kicking him. moments like those so magical. xx

i worry about the in laws loving our little treasure as they often say they dont know how they feel. guess only time will tell, but i have the same concerns abut his bro having an iccle one. i know she will certianly have lots of people who love her. even my dad is excited and our relationship has been strained over the years.
sorry will stop waffling lol xxxxxxxxxxxx love to all. carrie glad sunday went so well. i even saw a card today for naming ceremony, glad commercial world is catching up xx


----------



## pheobs1

Oh speeder ouch! Hope you're ok, that's sounds nasty xxx

Hi fizzy xxx

I know I'm lucky with DH and the cleaning xxx

Not sure wha to do today, I've felt brilliant so far during pregnancy apart from the first few days during implantation.  I had holidays from work thurs and fri, then yesterday I felt so run down I didn't go in. Last night at abou ten, the headache from hell hit. Really piercing through my right temple, so bad that I could t sleep and felt sick. I've been up with it most of the night, finally dropped off at about 5am with a kool n soothe strip on. I'm supposed to leave for work by 7:30 and I'm lying in the sofa afraid to move and dog tired. Thing is I've got the midwife tomorrow and dint know if I should take today and tomorrow off? Am I being a wimp?
Xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

If you haven't slept much then I would take today off, see how you feel later but can you go in before/after midwife? 

I'm sure work will understand - it is important to get sleep whilst can otherwise you will run yourself down!


----------



## Fizzypop

Whoops, baby brains thought I was replying to hak! 

So you are still in the early days, I would def not go in today and say I have been up all night with a headache. Can your midwife appt be a "doctors" appointment tomorrow?


----------



## pheobs1

Only my line manager knows I'm pg and jot that it's twins! It's my first appointment tomorrow and I had to take what they would give me so it's at 12:35, in my village and I work sn hour away, so I hunk I will be on the road all day tomorrow. Xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Typical midwives. Get used to that! Our one only works 12-3 on a Tuesday and Thursday! 

If your boss knows hun, then I wouldnt think twice about taking today off sick. They have to give you time off for antenatal appointments so you don't need to feel bad about that. As far as your colleagues are aware, could you just have 2 days off sick?


----------



## carrie lou

Pheobs personally I would take the day off. You have to put yourself and the two little beans first now. I was so so sick in early pregnancy I could hardly keep anything down, my GP wanted to sign me off work for 2 weeks but I was made to feel so guilty for taking time off (work were short staffed) that i went back after only 5 days and ended up vomiting in the loo at work and barely able to function  I was so tired when I got home in the evenings, I just crashed on the sofa and hardly ate any dinner. It was horrible and I wish in hindsight I had taken the whole 2 weeks. Look after yourself hun and hope you feel better soon  


Fizzy sorry you are having feeding probs, not sure what to suggest I'm afraid but hopefully someone else can advise


----------



## pinkcat

mini, thanks I know you are right, of course they will be loved just the same.  I think I will mention to my MIL how I feel.
Hazel, my goodness you are a star.  I don't even manage to do all the housework now! I make DH do the vacuuming on his day off! And he has to iron his own work shirts!
Speeder, poor you    I agree with fizzy that if you have a minor injuries unit near by then you can usually be seen quite quickly.
Fizzy, I'm not sure about the feeding problems as we went onto formula exlusively after just 3 days as Josh was starving and dehydrated   . After that I did tend to just feed feed feed, whenever I remotely thought he wanted it as I was so  anxious about how close he had been to getting seriously ill.  What does your HV say?   
Phoebs, I would take off all the time you need. Do not feel guilty about it


----------



## juju81

Hazel, I cant believe he made u do all that stuff! Luckily DH is very good but if he had been like that I'd have bloody told him to sort himself out! 

Speeder, is DD not in nursery? U need to rest it Hun  

Phoebe or pinkcat, sorry I cant see now who wrote it but my mil told me after I'd had Noah that she had been worried about how she'd feel towards Noah when he was born but she said the minute we told her we'd had him she went to pieces and he her favourite


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ahhhh!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

To be fair to my DH   he has been working 12 hour days since March almost 7 days a week on a new gardening business since he was made redundant from IT in a bank. He is doing really well and for the first time is booked up to the end of the year and some into next year.    For the last two years work has dried up in November. He had even more to fit in the run up to Charley's birth as he wanted the day off to come with me and did not want to lose hard earned clients. It is so difficult establishing a new business. It is now year 3 and he is only just starting to earn a profit. Not seen any yet though   So I am effectively the only bread winner too. Told him that he might have to chip in when I try an cut my hours more and we have to pay for childcare. His answer was 'no stress and pressure then?'  

Fizzy - as you know Charley got very ill from breast feeding inadequacy  - you have been doing really, really well.   If it is only one centile then I am sure it is not much to worry about until it drops two..... unless the HV is concerned? She might gain 1-2 oz a week for a week or two and then gain 8oz - especially if she is growing in length right now. Charley seems to go through spurts of growing length and losing all his chin fat and not making much weight up for a couple of weeks and then regains a little bit of a chin and gains weight. He is a tall boy compared to his weight. They say don't weigh them too often as it can cause anxiety. I have to say I have been a bit too often to clinic, but I like to see the score and if he has only gained an oz I do feed a bit more enthusiatically.

Speeder - you should definitely go to minor injuries or GP as you are pregnant and the ligaments will be weak and your centre of gravity and weight having more of an impact. From lots of experience of ankle injuries it is very important to get a correct diagnosis and the correct physiotherapy from day one. I ended up with a severely fractured and dislocated ankle from tripping over a bag in the dark on holiday and needed 9 screws and a metal plate put in it. It was completely trashed. I was told later that the reason why I had such a severe injury was because twice badly spraining it in the past and lots of minor strains had not been given the correct physiotherapy to retrain balance mechanisms and strength.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Oooooh ouch  

Your dh is truly forgiven !


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies

Sorry I haven't been around for a while been lurking though. My dh had a cold 2 weeks ago whereby he was off wrk found it hard wrk running around after him and DS . Now DS has got a cOld too bless him so been a tad busy .

Pheobs- welcome   x

Will have to catch up with everyone at a later time just wanted to bookmark and say hi x


----------



## ceci.bee

Hakuna - I think it is we all worry about how our LOs will be loved when they are born by extended family, esp when being open about the donor issue. My mum gave me brilliant advice that really helped my worries (esp with DH's family) that 'babies bring love with them' which became another (!) of my mantras and is soooooo true. It has to be a relative with a heart of stone that can look at a gorgeous cuddly baby and say 'gosh I don't love it as much because it was conceived with DS unlike my other grandchildren' - and the donor issue really fades in a way that I didn't realise - I have to keep reminding myself to read 'my story' to Joshi so we can keep up with the telling and talking.

Fizzy if Maya is dropping down the centiles then best to have a chat with the HV or GP - am sure they will reassure you and have some good advice about how to get her to get enough calories and get all her sleep in. I think you are doing brilliantly and like Hazel I wouldn't worry too much, although I know how easy that is to say and not do!!!! I have found that eating poached eggs (free range) and drinking stout (can't guiness here) really helps improve my breast milk supply and I guess if you eat lots of calories they will also get into your milk.

Carrie loving your new pic!

Amanada lovely to hear from you sorry your family are cold-ified

I sympathise with everyone with the work-aholic DH's - mine will work 7-5 then come home and as soon as Joshi is asleep will go back on the computer. He is away for 2 weeks now again and hope we get through it without any disasters (and not too many power cuts)!

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## Spaykay

my DH is work obsessed! Gets home at about 8pm then just wants to slouch! Feel like I'm married to his company at times. Oh well, brings in the dosh!

Welcome Phoebe

Kay xxx


----------



## pippilongstockings

Hello     

Sorry for being awol for so long..... Too many excuses, too boring to go into so I'll just say sorry!

It's so lovely to see people on here who I knew from the donor sperm thread - helloooooo all of you    And wowser Marge - I can't believe you're pregnant and ready to drop CONGRATULATIONS!!

Anyway, I'm off to catch up on all the news.  And also to have a look at the "hoping for another miracle" thread as I am sooooooo broody


----------



## pippilongstockings

OMG Kay!! Congratulations! Your pregnancy went so quickly


----------



## carrie lou

Hello Pippi! So good to hear from you again!  


Ceci - thanks for the comment re. my photo - thought it was about time I updated it, the last one was taken in July


----------



## ceci.bee

No worries Carrie - Z is gorgeous!

Pipi is it your boy's birthday today?? your ticker says he is 1 year today - hhope you are having a lovely day and lovely to see you back on here. am also broody - will you go for a third do you think??

xx


----------



## pinkcat

Hi pippi    Broody again?


----------



## pippilongstockings

hello   

No, Z is 19 months now and L is 4 so not sure what's going on with my tickers! 

I'd definitely have another - having said never never never again a couple of months ago    - but I don't think I would ever convince DH that it's a good idea. There are so many reasons why a 3rd would be a bad idea but I can't help being broody....

Ceci - go for it! Are you still abroad? Having 2 is blinking hard work but so worth it. My 2 adore each other and Z follows L round like a little (noisy, naughty!) puppy   

Carrie - I agree, what a gorgeous photo! 

pink cat - i know, i don't think the broodiness ever goes away properly....

Apologies to juju and northern monkey - i can't reply to PMs to some people for some reason. juju - when i replied to you ages ago it said that you'd blocked me! 

S'posed to be working oops better get off my bum


----------



## pippilongstockings

tickers sorted! I've done something useful with my day


----------



## Spaykay

Pippi - thank you! Did you boys come from the same embryos or donor? DO you have more embryos? Am I being nosey?  Babies are lovely, but I think I'm done now! 

Kay xxx


----------



## pippilongstockings

Same donor but IUI rather than IVF so no embryos   

Give it a year or so and you may be reconsidering! I was adamant that I was having no more ever ever ever until a few weeks ago


----------



## carrie lou

Zac is HARD work but I still want more    I've always wanted 3 babies  Just have to hope we'll be lucky again...


----------



## pippilongstockings

My Zachary is hard work too - I've never met such a complex child    and he's only very recently started sleeping through (since monday!) but I still want another one. I must be crazy.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yes u are crazy   

Ju was banned from pm's


----------



## Spaykay

Well... I may change my mind...but we have to make a decisuon on our embryos soon, if the clinic contact us! I feel lucky to have the 2 I've got, am 37 and am ready to move on now  we'll se ha ha

Kay xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

Kay if you don't use your embryos will your clinic let you donate them to someone else if you wanted? I am like Carrie I have always wanted three and just hope we are that lucky eventually    am soooooo broody already but we have to wait until we get back from Africa to come back to london to go to the clinic to start tx again - and save up some more cash!

xx


----------



## carrie lou

I'm thinking of egg sharing to cut the cost when we try for No 2 - with the advantage of helping another couple at the same time   Not sure if our clinic do egg sharing though, we may have to move to a different clinic


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

But you got preggars with clomid iui - would you really want to do IVF Carrie? Great if you want to make someone else's dream come true   , but a lot to go through.


----------



## carrie lou

I know it's a lot to go through but there's a chance of getting another baby at the end of it which would make it all worthwhile ... I can't really make up my mind to be honest  I suppose it would depend on the cost etc. Also better chance of success with IVF - and we only have 3 units of sibling sperm left so wouldn't want to waste them. And I really would like to help someone in the same way we've been helped. Oh I don't know.


----------



## Spaykay

Donation is one option, but I don't know if I feel comfortable doingvthat. Stupid given that we used an egg donor, but it would mean full genetic siblings somewhere for EG with no knowledge of if the recipient is successful and no chance of EG ever contacting them. I'm thinking medical research. DH wants to use them, but then he hardly helps with the 2 he's got!

It's hard. Dodn't think I'd have this dilema but A. Snuck in there!

Kay xxx


----------



## speeder

just a quick one to say there was a lovely article in the family section of yesterday's Guardian about a guy not brought up by his genetic father. a very positive article, for a change, albeit not about the donor issue, and taking a different stance.

x


----------



## teresal

http://secure.smilebox.com/ecom/openTheBox?sendevent=4d6a63354f4441324f444d3d0d0a&sb=1

have made a video of merediths first year if any of you want to have a look you are more than welcome, something i have done for family living abroad

sorry don't post much, nothing happening with us at the moment, the usual stuff of running round after meredith and work 

hugs to all xx

/links


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## pinkcat

Lovely album Teresa


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## sweetdreams73

Teresa - thanks for sharing, she is so cute x  

carrie lou - I got pg with one of our IUI's but then had M/C so decided on doing IVF next TX as better success rates than just doing 1 x IUI again... not easy decision... the egg sharing is such a special thing to do    great if you are able to and help another family... I really wanted to do it with our IVF cycle but was told I am too old (3 even though I have great quality embies and produce lots.... go figure that!!!...  we have 6 x frozen day 5 blasts in the freezer at our IVF clinic and I would love to go for number 3, but DH says 2 children is enough and we cant afford anymore TX...   but if we dont have another baby then I would like to donate my embies to another couple but DH not keen on that as then our boys would then have full siblings out there somewhere.... not easy decisions!!..  x

speeder - will check that article out, thanks x  

pippi - hope you can convince DH on having TX for number 3...   how exciting if you can go for another x  

ceci - hope you and Joshi will be ok with DH being away and everything all goes smoothly x   

amanda - hope DS gets over his cold    x


lots of love and     to everyone else

AFM - boys are doing so great, they are changing so much and getting so much bigger now, they really are completely identical in looks, its only because they are different sizes you can tell them apart... other than that its really hard to tell who is who!! daniel the smaller one is now a lovely 9lb 1oz and matthew a chunky 10lb 2ozs which is fab considering their birth weights of 2lb 13ozs and 3lb 6ozs... they are now 15 weeks old but their adjusted age as born 7 weeks premature is only 8 weeks old and their development is that of an 8 week old, its so lovely now they are smiling, laughing, cooing and sucking their thumbs... last week they started sleeping 8 hours at night from 11pm to 7am which is just fantastic...  they are such lovely boys and such a joy.... love being a mummy and already getting broody for another baby.... OMG what am I like!!

lots of love
sweetdreamsxxxx


----------



## speeder

sweet dreams - what a lovely happy post - your boys sound delightful. so glad you all sound so happy - specially getting all that sleep! what is your trick?!  

teresal - on I phone but will have a wee look at your lovely little girl - what a nice idea. 

think we will stop at two, all going well. I am one of three and always wanted three but coming round to dh view point for many reasons. my sis has four and they are all lovely kids but it's a huge strain on her marriage and I wonder if a simpler life is better all round! 

I am over 38 weeks now. have always measured bang in or over but now I am measuring less all of a sudden. midwife isn't concerned... baby is half engaged - would that account for it? suspect I will be overdue again so don't think it will be any day soon! 

speeder x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - babies are supposed to drop at 38 weeks - no worries there.

SD - lovely about your boys growth. They are bigger than Charley was even at their real age I think. He is 23weeks old and only about 15lbs.

Sadly you won't be able to donate the embryos as they treat you just as an egg donor, so the embryos would have to have been created when you were 35 or younger.
I am also fed up with the system as I also produce lots of eggs (22 in my first cycle) at the age of 38-39 and have produced a healthy child yet can't help anyone else.
I would also love another child. We have one blast frostie left from the last cycle, but not sure if I can afford it, and I have ziltch help from anyone so it would be just down to me to cope juggling being the only bread winner and two children of different ages and needs.

Teresa - I was crying during your video - it is so beautiful.

I feel overwhelmed at times about the shear beauty of having a child after so much longing and heartache. Some people in this world do not realise what a special gift a child is. We will never forget. This is why it makes me so mad when people argue about IVF provision saying it is a gift to have a child and not a right - as infertility patients we know that more than ANYONE.

I also did a little chrimbo photoshoot this week with Charley plus a few others and baby sensory Halloween in this album
password = babynov11

http://photobucket.com/babynov11

/links


----------



## Fizzypop

Hazel and Teresa your photos are lovely. I came up with the idea last night to by a photo frame and do some photos of mya for the grandparents Christmas pressies. DH mum and dad are big on home made presents!

Hazel - what centile is charley on? Mya is on 0.4th but has slipped down from 2nd. 

SD - so glad boys are thriving. Isn't it weird when they start going through? Mya has done it for nights in a row - roughly 10-7 - and I still don't know what to do myself when wake up at 5 and she hasn't fed. This morning I told myself to go back go sleep and manage to doze on and off!

Well HV told me I have crap bf milk but she has just gone 10 hours in between feeds on myilk so can't be that crap hey!

I would love 3 too as I am only child but dh is one of 4 and only wants 2. I am secretly hoping for twins next time around (I know, nutter), if not then I'll have to use my powers of persuasion  His excuse used to be that with three you need a big car but he isolating at me because we bought an estate car and not this 7 seater ford thing so he can't use that now (we've got a dog so need a big car).


----------



## teresal

hazel. the pics are lovely   

thanks everyone, we are all so loucky to have our beautiful babies


----------



## pheobs1

Teresal and Hazel is so lovely to see your little ones, we are so lucky xxx

Sorry for the me post girls, but I just need a bit of support. None of our fertility treatment is on my medical records. I live in a tiny little village where everyone knows everyone and knows everyone's business. I didn't want anyone knowing about our donor treatment and DH is extremely anxious about it. So we decided on having our private treatment where it stays private. We are really lucky to have an amazing and supportive clinic who provide around the clock 24 hour care, so it's always been fine. So when we got our bfp I went to my go a fewweeks after and said id done a HPT and was pg. They referred me to the midwife. I saw the midwife at 8 weeks, by which time I'd ha two scans at our clinic and seen our babies heart beats. So when I saw the midwife I told her that we had paid to have a private early scan to put our minds at rest, so had found out that it's twin. She was so lovely and said how exciting and that after my next appointment she would refer me for consultant care.

She came to my house today for my booking in appointment, she is a lovely lady, a bit ditzy. During my appointment she told me at least four times that she didn't want not worry me or sound negative but ... Lots of early twin pregnancies don't continue and often one twin may not continue and you only have the one baby, but not to worry me! Going through all the tests, I said that I'd ticked no for the downs test because it says you can't have it with twins anyway, she said right but when you have your 12 week scan you may see that there is only one baby so then you can always change your mind. She then said we will wait for your 12 scan before I refer you to the consultant because there may be just the one baby you see, oh dear I don't want to worry you but I want you to be prepared.

I feel like poop! I know she doesn't know I've had ivf (both DH and I have twins in our immediate families), but she knows I've had a scan and seen the heart beats. I'm terrified now. We have a scan at our clinic on Monday but it's going to be a long weekend. Plus my beautiful fur baby had a lump removed 6 months ago which turned out to be cancer, but it hadn't. Spread fromthe lump. DH found another lump on him Monday and he's booked in to have it off tomorrow and I found another last night. 
I didn't need miss negative midwife. I'm almost 10 weeks and now I feel like I just peed on a stick :-(
Sorry for the selfish post xxx


----------



## speeder

hi phoebes -just to give you a big  

maybe the midwife has had fingers burned before and is just being very cautious? why don't you phone your clinic for a reassuring chat? xx


----------



## pheobs1

I've just emailed my consultant, she should get back to me within the hour. Ive been feeling great but now have an upset tummy and diorreah!

Thanks xxx


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks pink cat. My mother just came home and is fuming! Xxx


----------



## speeder

that's good phoebes - and great your clinic are so supportive. 

I have lost count of the times people have said the wrong things to me when pg - they just don't think. good advice that they are only words and opinions and don't actually change what is happening for you and your precious twins.  

about ten people have said to me this week "ooh you are very neat" or similar and I am already a little anxious about it and feel like yelling "sod off" - one of these was a retired midwife who is a complete stranger to me! think we all have to develop a thick skin


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## carrie lou

Oh Pheobs hun what a negative midwife! I'm sure *some *people start off with twins and lose one BUT I remember reading when I was pregnant and anxious, that once you have seen a heartbeat, the chance of miscarrying goes down dramatically - and you have seen 2 healthy heartbeats so that is surely very reassuring. Honestly try not to worry. I'm afraid you will find (as Speeder pointed out) that when you are pregnant there always seems to be something to worry about. With me my MW said my bump was measuring "too small" and I might need a growth scan to check that baby was growing OK. I went home all anxious and spent the next 2 weeks worrying, then at my next appointment I asked "So is my bump measurement OK then?" She said "oh yes it's fine" - she had forgotten all about what she said about it being too small, and there was me losing sleep worrying about it! And my baby when he was born was spot on average. The point I'm trying to make is that pregnancy is unfortunately full of false alarms and worries but thankfully most of them are just that, false alarms - try not to worry, I'm sure BOTH your little ones will be fine.


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## juju81

Phoebe hun, as hard as it might be please try and ignore what the bint said.  

Fizzy, Noah was under the 2nd centile until 18months when he finally managed the 9th   well done you for the full nights sleep x

Sweetdreams, lovely to hear from u, would love to see some updated pictures


----------



## carrie lou

Meant to say, Teresa I loved your photos of Meredith  


And SD, lovely to hear things are going so well with your two boys. Am very jealous of all you ladies whose little ones are sleeping through already, Zac has never slept through the night in his life - the longest he has ever managed is 6 hours  I think he's what's known as "high needs" but I love him to bits and wouldn't change him for the world!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

You need baby boot camp   

Pheobs - tell her to take a hike!     

Tezza - Photos are lovely!   

SD - lovely to hear the updates. Time goes so quick!


----------



## Spaykay

Sweetdreams - I feel tge same as ur DH about donating our embrios. Feel guilty but cab't change how I feel 

Kayxx


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## sweetdreams73

Pheobs - sweetie, *just to let you know that it is utter total rubbish about YOU not being able to have Nuchal Test (downs test) with twins.*.. I had it done with my twin boys at 12 weeks and our risk was really really low... also if your twins have their own amnoitic sacks and have their own placenta which they will have if they are from two embies rather than one embie that has split into two like mine with identical twins... the likelihood of losing one (vanishing twin) is much much lower and if you have seen both heartbeats which of course you have is very low risk indeed... pls pls do not worry   and dont listen to your m/w she obviously hasnt a clue what she is talking about...   if I was you I would opt to have a private NT scan for downs if NHS are being funny about it if you want it and that would put your mind at ease...Also when you are carrying twins it is recommended that you have your antenal care with consultants NOT midwives especially if you have conceived with IVF... my clinic in london UCLH has its own antenatal clinic especially for twins... I know you said you live in a small village but could you not travel to nearest town with big hospital for your apts.... would certainly put your mind at ease and you will get better care... also with twins they recommend that you get scans every four weeks so much more often than if you are just carrying just one baby and you also get more check up apts and much more monitoring too.... if you want anymore info about twins, just pm me... lots of  

Fizzy - glad mya is sleeping through thats great  . Fab that she is sleeping longer on breastmilk aswell... well done you...  my boys are now off my expressed breastmilk and just on formula and have just started sleeping through since switching to all formula which is interesting...Yep very weird the first time they go through the night... the first few nights I just lay awake waiting for them to wake up and cry for their feed and they did wake up but then had a little chat to themselves  and settled themselves back to sleep almost straight away... I kept sneaking into their room to just check they were actually ok as worried about them as no crying!! x 

Speeder - getting them to sleep through - trick is to make sure that they are getting enough feeds (every three hours) during the day from 7am to 11pm and not too much sleep during the day (just four hours sleep split into 1 hour morning nap, lunchtime nap 2hours and afternoon nap of 1 hour) and a strict routine which you try as much as you can to stick to so you get same times and sleeps every day....with twins you just have to have them on a routine otherwise your life would be a totally and utter nightmare  ... funny thing now is the boys know the routine better than me and even wake up 10mins before their time for feeds... clever little ones!!

Juju - hope all great with you DH and Noah... not sure how I do a link to put some photos of the boys... any ideas?? x  
xxxxxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

SD - DS was like that with his routine!   

Pheobs - I agree with SD, i think you need to tell them about the IVF. You don;t have to tell them about using a donor but they will give you more support once they know.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - I am sure that now they have developed the nuchal screening for twins. People on other threads have had combined screening results for twins so I don't think it is true that they can't do it.
You might not want to know of course and even if you did and something was wrong you might not want to do anything about it. It is very personal choice whether to screen in the first place.

As for twins becoming one - that is possible, but you should not dwell on it unless it happens.    Try to enjoy being pregnant as much as possible, it goes so quickly. There is always something to worry about, and with twins more than your fair share. All pregnancies ''can'' end in miscarriage, but many more pregnancies are successful than not, so try not to worry too much about the words of that woman. As the others have said, once you have seen the heartbeat the risk is lower. My first baby who did die at about 14 weeks was always much too small for dates (over 1 week too small) from the 8 week scan. If your embryos measured correctly then the risk is even lower hun.

Fizzy - Charley weighed 14lbs 13oz today (23 weeks) and is just above the 9th centile line. He was born on the 50th centile and is still following that for height. Head circumference 75th centile. He has only put on 2oz per week for the last two weeks.

That is horrid of your HV to say you have poor milk. That does not exatly instill confidence!

SD - I did my album through photobucket - it is free.


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## speeder

fizzy my dd dropped from 75th at birth to 0.4 centime. is now on 50th. x


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## hakunamatata

phoebs im sure the girls reassuring words have made you feel a lot better. glad you have a good circle of support. 

have yet to look at the piccies girls but will do soon.

lovely to hear from you sd, sounds like youre doing a very efficient job and the boys are thriving xx

poor dh had a heart attack this am. he came back from his early walk with ruby to find an ambulance outside. man ive never seen him so scared. my neighbour is full term tomorrow with her second. its been here well over an hour so im hoping all is good.

been a stressful week this week, lots of medical appointments. found out aneamic which is not too significant but then also gestational diabetes and midwife only just picked up that im rhesus neg so im booked in for a prority anti d next week. can you imagine if this was missed!!!! i know its all manageable but on top of the spd and psychiatry appointments ive had to attend due to mental health history i must admit i felt a bit overwhelmed yest. but baby is well and thats all that matters. i realise how lucky i am just a little   . hope you dont think im over reacting xx


----------



## hakunamatata

ah teresa the piccies are lovely. i found the music so soothing, tho widget was having a kick. its a lovely idea. i know piccie 68, her cheaky face is a dream. well done both of you xxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## carrie lou

Hakuna I can't believe they've only just discovered you are Rh neg  I was anaemic too at your stage.  

Zac is in a routine during the day and breastfeeds every 3 hours or so from 7am till 10pm ish. He's also now on 3 solid meals a day and it has made no difference to his sleep. He has a 90 minute nap at lunchtime and 2 or 3 other catnaps during the day of 30 minutes or so. Also we have a good bedtime routine in place since he was 6 weeks old. So I'm not sure what more I can do really to persuade him to sleep better  Maybe I just have to be patient and persevere and hope that things improve eventually


----------



## Lindz

Sorry for the quick post. Literally have 2 mins while the babies have a snack and watch teletubbies! 

Just wanted to say to Pheobs that I’m fuming too. Can’t believe she was so insensitive. As if we don’t worry enough. At my first scan (6 weeks) we saw two heartbeats and consultant did mention that maybe we shouldn’t tell too many people it was twins as it was so early. At our 8 week scan the same consultant said that they were both measuring right, both had good heartbeats and we should get on with planning and tell whoever we wanted. Of course really sad things happen but they aren’t that common and at the stage you’re at there is no reason at all for her to be saying those things to you. Please forget it! Oh, I also had the nuchal test so not sure what the problem is with that. 

Hello everyone else! SD- you sound like you’re doing amazingly well. I’ve struggled pretty much all year and am only just managing to properly enjoy things and that’s with a military routine, would have gone mad otherwise!

AFM, thanks to you guys things are better here. After the CC we now all sleep to 6:30 which is beyond amazing and we’ve not been stressing too much about food either and as a result DD has started to be ok with lumps and DS is getting better slowly. Both having a chew on some apple and crackers at the mo. 

xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie I would try to limit his sleep to just 2 a day.  

Lindz wow glad things are better


----------



## amandaloo

I lost my post       

Carrielou- Hope you are ok must be hard to have broken sleep for so long   . Think my DS has about 2-3 sleeps a day morn midday and sometimes after tea other times he dosent sleep at teatime now and waits till bedtime. Not sure how you could limit the sleeps, Ive never really done that Ive let him sleep when he needs too and not really had that many problems.

Pheobs- Hope your consultant and the ladies on here have reassured you    . Hope your ok     .  i know when i went for 7 week scan they said once you see the heartbeat theres a very low risk of m/c   

Fizzy- and Hazel- My Ds was 16-13 at 4 months old! Hes between the 75th and the 91st percentile. Think you worry when they are high up on the percentile too I was panicking he was too big! Havent had him weighed since as H/V said I didnt need to bother coming monthly. think hes loosing some of his chubbiness now and getting longer iykwim.

Juju- hows Noah doing?  You looking forward to xmas?

sweetdreams- Lovely to hear the twins are thriving   

Lindz- Really happy the CC worked for you  

hakuna-They missed checking my bloods by nearly 2 month and i was anemic too> I dont think you are stressing you have got a lot on dont worry    

teresa- loved the pictures/video thing just perfect  

Right best be off Dh's tea to make gonna update my profile pic for those not on **    All going ok here DS has gotten over his cold and weve just been to the lakes for 5 days was a lovely break   

mightymini,spaykay, and others i will have missed a big hello


----------



## speeder

hak - honey you have a lot on your plate  .  I have been anaemic both times and it can make you very tired so it's good it's picked up now. just wanted to say make sure they dont prescribe you ferrous sulphate as it makes most folk horribly constipated. it's very cheap for the nhs but no one can tolerate it! I am taking pregaday which I can tolerate slightly better but you have to specifically request it. I am also taking spatone from boots - I am managing to get my iron levels up. 

not to scare you but one of the reasons I might have lost blood after dd was because I didn't get my anaemia under control before giving birth. so it's great you have so much time to get your iron levels sorted. 

had a whole day Xmas shopping which has been lovely but so sleepy now! 

x


----------



## hakunamatata

thanks speeder. shopping all day!! how on earth did you manage that xx


----------



## speeder

not entirely sure hak - I am like a zombie now!

put up Xmas tree and decorations with dd tonight and it was so lovely as dd understood for the first time what was going on and helped put bobbles on the tree! made me v emotional although I am v weepy right now anyway! 

carrie - you must be one tough lady to cope with those nights - you are amazing. dd slept through the nite from seven months so you never know, you might be on the home straight soon to more sleep! x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

speeds - I didn't realise that if you are anaemic at the birth you could lose blood    I'm anaemic too. and keep forgetting my tabs   

Hak did they not check your blood group on your booking in appt?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

That is not the case - but if you are anaemic at birth and you do lose blood it is more dangerous as you do not have the reserves, so will need a blood transfusion much sooner.
For instance if you have a haemaglobin level of 12 and lose a litre of blood, your levels might drop to 9 which is low, but not dangerous and can be corrected with a couple of weeks of iron tablets.
If your level is 9 before you go in and then you lose a litre of blood and your levels drop below 7, you will need a blood transfusion.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I had a blood transfusion.    

Think my levels are 9 now


----------



## speeder

that's true Hazel but consultant def said to me that being anaemic in itself increases chance of haemorrhage. mini - pop those pills!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

doc said take 3 a day    i'm taking 2. can't take anymore!


----------



## speeder

I know - they are yuk! sounds weird but beetroot juice seems to correct the problem for me! mmmmm lovely 

my hb levels are given in 3 figures I.e. 102 - does that mean 10.2? I have no idea!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - I have worked in ICU for over 10 years and never heard that. Our patients run at a haemaglobin level of around 7-8 to improve blood flow around the brain and heart, as the blood is not as thick with less red cells in it and flows better - we only give them a blood transfusion if they drop below 7.
If the platelet count drops below 50 we worry about bleeding, but that is not anaemia, that is thrombocytopaenia, which can also happen in serious haemorrhages.

Yes 102 is 10.2. Depends if it is being expressed in amount per litre (1000ml) or amount per decilitre (100ml) respectively.

Puzzling that the consultant said that about bleeding risk. Must do some reading in case there is something I have missed about anaemia in pregnancy.


----------



## speeder

2 gps, 3 midwives and a consultant told me that but my favourite dr google just confirmed you might be right - there is no hard evidence for it. why would they say that then? 

thing is I have blamed myself for 2 years that my haemorrhage was because I didnt get my iron levels up! plus thought I was less at risk this time because my levels over 10. 

last time I went to 5.6 after delivery and it's only now I understand how low that is - but it sounds like it might just be bad luck!!!!!! 

sigh sigh

hospital have said to go in as soon as poss once I feel baby on its way - but dd has to be dropped off by dh 50 minutes away first - so I guess I could be on my own at hosp for first few hours. anyone been through something similar? don't mean to sound pathetic but I am feeling jittery as heck about it all!!

ps morning everyone


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## hakunamatata

speeder bless you honey you sound quite anxious and in need of tlc.    

mini they did my initial bloods but missed the rhesus neg bit   . booked in tues for anti d, and diabetic stuff in am xx

love to all xxxx


----------



## carrie lou

My levels dropped to 9 point something after Z was born, I lost nearly a litre of blood  Made me glad I'd taken my iron tablets when I was pregnant otherwise it would have been a lot worse and I might have needed a transfusion. I think I had ferrous fumarate rather than ferrous sulphate and I didn't get any nasty side effects from it. It's worth asking your doc for a different iron preparation if you don't get on with the one you're on.


----------



## carrie lou

Speeder I hope you're right about the sleeping through but I'm not counting on it as he doesn't seem to be making any progress in that direction at all  We've been co-sleeping for the last few weeks, I know people have different views on that but it works for me because at least I can get some sleep! I couldn't carry on getting up 3 times or more every night.

You don't sound pathetic, after what happened last time I'm not surprised you are feeling jittery  but I'm sure everything will be OK.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder honey - don't blame yourself darling.   It is bad luck and circumstances. For instance with me I could blame myself because my BMI is slightly raised and I elected for a caesarian - both of these increase the risk of a PPH happening - but I am just going to say, yes it was a risk, and yes it happens, but those were my circumstances at the time and although risks are increased it is not absolute it will happen - it is just bad luck at the end of the day. It reduced my ability to breast feed as my milk did not come in because of both these factors - bleed and c-section - and my baby became very very sick and in SCBU - I feel so guilty about that. There is always something to blame yourself for.
I also read some things last night that said it was an obstetric myth that PPH is caused by anaemia although it has been widely talked about in the past. Many medical sources say that it increases the risk of the PPH needing a transfusion because the anaemia has got too low.

It must be scary for you - but they know about it and will be ready to manage it. Just tell them how scared you are and that you want an obstetrician to be available when you get to third stage labour.

I am sure your DH will be back in no time with you.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Also Speeder - do you have a close friend who could come to the hospital with you for the first couple of hours or drop dd off for you?

You will be fine hun


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## speeder

thanks girls  

Hazel - we should be easier on ourselves - reading your post made me realise that. you have nothing to blame yourself for! and as I have come to realise, we all make the best possible decision at the right time. your natural instincts as a mum is why charley is thriving  

my mum will run me to hosp but she isn't very calm so it sounds daft but I would rather be on my own and stay calmer that way. most of my good friends I could ask have got kids. I have just got to get on with it - my consultant is good and says everything I need will be on hand. let's face it - baby has to come out somehow so I have just go to get on with it! 


on a lighter note I have found that eating mince pies appears to alleviate my anxiety so dd is napping whilst I devour mince meat yum yum 

carrie - I think it's whatever gets you through... my sister co slept with all hers - it just wasn't for me. in Scotland the advice is different and it's said to be ok so maybe you need to move north of the border  

hak - meant to say that i couldn't believe they missed the rhesus negative - thank goodness it's been picked up!


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## Spaykay

Speeder - normal to worry. Can ur mum not have DD? Stupid question as if she cod then that'd be organised.

Carrie Lou - I'd cosleep if getting no sleep too! I did at 7am ths morning and he hogged the bed!!! He akso slept nap on me so I could kip. In Sweden it's recommended. I'm a tough mummy though and say no to DD climbing in! I bf in bed at night and we both drop off...I put himback in hiscot when J realise thiugh.

Kay xxx


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## Fizzypop

Spaykay - sounds just like what I do! My record so far is waking up 2 hours later!!!

My DH gets annoyed when M goes in the bed but yet gives me no help in trying to settle her at 2 in the morning when she wants cuddles. In the end I thought screw you and put her in bed just so I could sleep!! Luckily for ours it seems to be a phase and she is currently sleeping for her long night time period squished against the side of the Moses basket!

Speeder - I was on my own for the start of my labour. I was induced and it started working at about 8 pm and DH left at 10 pm, he didn't come back until 6 am next morning :-( (they are not allowed at night if you are not on labour ward). It was my worst nightmare but I got thru it! Lots of mags and take the iPod, had a few baths and cried in pain a lot, lol. Oh and lots of drugs  To be honest the time went so quickly I didn't notice he wasn't there. You will be fine hun xxx


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## amandaloo

Speeder- I didn't realise you were so close to the birth heck where's time gone ? Hope you can get things sorted and best of luck for the birth x


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## carrie lou

I used to co-sleep on a part time basis, i.e. he would start the night in his crib and when I got tired of the constant re-settling (around 2 or 3am  ) I would put him in bed with me. But around the 4 month mark I realised I was spending more time re-settling him than actually sleeping  so gave up and started co-sleeping full time.  Also he's too big for his crib now and the cot won't fit in our bedroom.


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## Fizzypop

Have you looked into travel cots for your room? That will be our next step after moses basket because they are smaller than full size cot. We can just about fit one in our room. Not sure if you have heard of this also but lots of my NCT friends put a hot water bottle in the moses/cot to keep it warm and also put something in that smells of mum. I started using a taggie against her face when cuddling up to me after feeding and settling her, then when asleep transferred to moses with it still against her face and laying on her side (to copy position on me). I was trying to associate it with sleep and also would hopefully mean she can settle with DH and not just me! Anyway, you are many months ahead of me so am sure you know about all this stuff already!

My next challenge is self-settling. She doesn't do it at all at the moment so I need to get tough (so hard though!!) then after that work on set nap times rather than just adhoc during the day


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## carrie lou

Good thought Fizzy, we may need to get a travel cot anyway for our next holiday next year so will look into it. Zac doesn't self settle so if you can achieve that, you'll be ahead of me! He does have regular nap times but I have to settle him for them. Yes we have tried the hot water bottle, he wasn't fooled  TBH I think it's the movement he likes, he enjoys being rocked and bounced to sleep and cries if we stop


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Remember to take the hotwater bottle out again before baby - or child - a friend of a friend's daughter ended up with 2nd degree burns all across her abdomen because the bottle leaked.

We are doing reasonably well with self settling. Takes ages to settle in the evening - I often end up feeding to sleep - bad mummy   and he wakes up and grumbles for a few times until fully asleep. I have to go in shush, hold hand. I avoid getting him back out of cot now and have put the nursing chair next to the cot so I can hold his hand for a while.

Once asleep he often sleeps through with a couple of little cries out in the night. Maybe a dummy. Occassionally a feed.
I am tired today though because he had the snuffles last night and the dog was whining and the cat was on my legs.


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## carrie lou

I often feed to sleep  but have accepted now that Zac is a child with "high needs" and attachment parenting is the way to go for us!  I'm sure he won't still be breastfeeding to sleep and sharing our bed when he starts school (at least I hope not  ) so I reckon it'll be OK...


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hope you don't have to eat your words Carrie     
I never slept in my own bed the whole night until I had chicken pox when I was 4 and was too hot.  I crept into bed with my parents every night and often my mum would then creep into my bed and leave me with Daddy!  So at least some of us got some sleep.


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## amandaloo

Aya ladies

Carrie and fizzy- when my DS was newborn I was really brave and let him cry out  obviously I kept an eye on him but usually peeping around the door . I read after I did it you aren't supposed to? but it didn't do him any harm at all felt quite guilty about it to be honest but like I say I was keeping an eye on him and I didnt leave him too long. Anyway It didn't take long at all before he was self settling and I'm sure it's because I did that at the beginning I've never had a problem since apart from an odd cry due to wind when I've had to go back in  . I put him to bed at night awake and he gets to sleep himself has done for a long time . I also moved him to his cot at 7 weeks old as we were disturbing each other and that made a big difference .  He's never been in bed with me I've never needed to do it.


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## speeder

I always fed dd to sleep in the night feeds - I didn't see the point of waking her up. I know they say you shouldnt but dd is a great sleeper and I honestly don't think it did any harm. 

re the travel cot - they aren't very comfy and not really designed for long term use. you can get a nice wooden crib in mothercare for about 60 - or second hand off gumtree really cheaply - and they can stay in them until they can sit up unsupported. might be an easier option? 

hello Amanda - time is dragging for me hee hee - funny how others pregnancies are so much quicker! hope all is good with you and ds. I think self settling is just fine - I did it too  

hazel it sounds like a menagerie! is dh ok with it? my dh won't let anything fluffy in our room


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

DH is just as bad as me.
I am sleeping in Charley's room with him. Usually the dog is in with DH and the cats stay downstairs. I think the black cat was cold last night and decided my leg was warm. The dog was supposed to be in with DH, but he does not close the door properly sometimes and the dog hears a fox or something outside and goes mental running up and down the stairs.
One day it will be a burgler or something and he really will be trying to tell us.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

when DS was born i did the baby whisperer EASY routine, Eat, activity, sleep then 'you' (that bit was a joke!) anyway basically it makes sure baby doesn't associate sleep with having a feed. If he slept on a bottle i'd wake him, i made sure he was half awake when puttng him to sleep, just so he knew where he was and that he could self settle.  I changed his nappy after every feed so he could wake up. 

It worked until he was 4 months when the dummy got in the way    we had to get rid of the dummy and teach him to self settle as he had stsarted waking 10 times in the night (no joke)  I was not going to start rocking and jumping him around as apparently it makes them worse.    so we decided to do the PUPD, i know its not everyones cup of tea but it worked for us, we left him to cry for 10mins each time. It got quicker and quicker, and eventually he was waking at 4am with a littel murmer and going back to sleep!    

It does work and i think eventually all babies need some sort of cry down, they need to get it out. I wasn't prepared to not sleep for a yr, i ended up on anti despressants because of the sleep dep so we really had to do something fast, plus i was going back to work. 

I'd do all that again with number 2, except the dummy part    so we'll see how it pans out without the dummy in the early days    but at least i know what to expect!


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## carrie lou

Speeder we have a mothercare crib but he can sit unaided now and starts to try pulling himself up - so I really think he is too big for it now.   

We tried PUPD but found it too stressful, Zac just cried throughout, picking him up made him cry even harder  so we abandoned that. And the one time I tried CC he screamed so hard he made himself vomit  I think it's a case of whatever works for you, is the right thing to do. Personally I am happy with the arrangement we have at the moment but if the time comes when I'm no longer happy, I'll do something to change it


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## Fizzypop

It's a bit hardcore but I have quite a few friends who have put the baby gate on the kids door to stop them getting out and had a few nights of howling before they got the hint to stay in their own room! 

I always said I would give myself 3 months before I started getting a bit tougher on her. It's so hard though!! DH has week before Xmas off so good opportunity then.

My problem is I'm too soft and like an easy life so that's why I end up feeding to sleep or cuddling to sleep etc.


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## amandaloo

Carrielou - you are right every baby is so different and it's what works for you that matters   

Mightymini - my DS dosent have a dummy I wasn't against them or anything I just didn't use one as I was attempting to breastfeed and heard it wasn't a good mix. When I started to express instead I just decided that he didn't need one . You cab always use a comfort blankie or something if you are struggling instead x

Speeder- thanks glad I wasn't the only one  . 

Pinkcat    oh nooooo Will he have a blankie ? Must be hard


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I guess to a child the distance between you could be 10 miles when they can't see you or touch you. They don't know you are just downstairs when they can't see you as they don't have a sense that you still exist if you can't be seen. I remember feeling very afraid in bed by myself when I was little. Almost too scared to get out of bed to go to mummy and having to run to escape the monsters in my room.
I always had to have the landing light on when I got a bit older and the door left open a particular amount.
For the first few years I would not go to sleep in my room and ended up sleeping on the sofa in the evening next to mummy and then she would transfer me to my bed and I would transfer myself to her bed a bit later.

If you think about it, it is most unusual in the natural world for young to sleep separate from parents. Most tiny mammals would be eaten or freeze to death in the wild if not with parents at night and would cry so that the mother could find them if lost in the dark.
We expect a lot from our young. It is only a matter of a few hundred years in the millions of years of evolution that we have expected this.
I read children can develop mental health problems and problems with trust if you don't ride it out quite right. On the other hand if no one gets sleep then there are developmental and behaviour problems then too. No one said this parenting lark was easy did they?


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## Spaykay

Yeh. I had to balance between cry and feel guilty or no sleep and have exhausted child. I have no attachment issues from being in the garden... a magpie dud attack me though!

DD had no dummy but used comfirter when old enough. Has just griwn out of needing it out of her bed.

Gawd DS is noisy!!!! I'm in his room until nights are a bit more routine. Gwd...sneeze, cough, suck, grunt! 

Kay xxx


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## Spaykay

Add fart annnnnd cry! to that list ! Another sleepless night ahead then!

We almost went stairgate on door with DDs escapes...but putting her back a zillion times eventually worjed. It's all trial and error and ws'll never rwally understand them, we'll just cope I guess.

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hazel - don't beleive everything you read!! DS goes to bed fine and has slept in his own room from 3 weeks,He slept better in his own room than with us. I think we used to wake him up.  The PUPD lasted about a week, within a day we could see results. all babies cry when they are put to sleep. He goes to nursery fine and knows we are going to be there to pick him up. 
Its me thats been left with the anxiety and had to come off the pills when i got pg. so having him sleep properly was the only way we could live our life. 

I;ve never left him to cry for more than 10 mins, as they get older it gets harder to do as they understand alot more. If i thought he was insecure in anyway then i would sort it, in fact i am more worried about when the new baby comes along and how is going to feel especially when he finds out hes from a donor and his brother isn't. 

Amanda - He has a blanket and now a bunny    I gave him the blanket when we were getting rid of the dummy, so i'll do the same with the baby but from day one.


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## carrie lou

Amanda I avoided dummies for the first 6 weeks or so for the same reason, to avoid nipple confusion - then when I did give him one he didn't want it, would rather have mummy thanks   Oh well I suppose it's one less thing to wean him off. He does have a comforter, not sure how attached he is to it as yet but we'll keep working on that.

Hazel - interesting way of putting it. I suppose you are right


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## Spaykay

Hmmmm....my goodboy of 1 wake a night WON'T sleep. I've even tried the telling him to shut the hum up and go to bl sleep technique...but that's not working either! Fine in my arms funnily enough! Well, my arms need to sleep!

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Mines not well. It's gonna be a long night


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## speeder

it's all really interesting the whole sleep thing. I am only now remembering that dd slept right next to my bed for nine months one way or another before going to her own room. i never co slept though - sounds lovely but i was worried i would squash her  . but she is fine in the dark, on her own - last nite I checked her at 830 pm - an hour after going down and she was wide awake, lying in the dark and she said "I just lying mummy, not tired but I happy". which I thought was so sweet. and quite unusual! 

I think a lot depends on the baby - and what works for one does not work for another. even now dd has a dummy at nite which isn't ideal at her age but she was a really sucky baby. 

Hazel - i can't ever remember wanting to share a bed with my parents - and even now I love having the bed to myself. I hate to think what that says about me    

is there evidence that cc causes real harm? I was happy to do it for a short time so dd could learn to self settle and I honestly feel it was the right thing to do - but I know it doesn't work for everyone. oddly I never let dd cry in her cot now, as I know when she does it's because she isn't well.


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## speeder

mini - hope it's not too long a nite - is it that awful cold going round?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah I only did it when I knew he was in a silly phase. 

Yeah I've had a virus for 6 wks now. My cold has come back and I feel rough. Ds has a cold think he's teething too. He's not sleeping in the day so is overtired and now has been up an hour!


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## Spaykay

Oh MM hope you got some sleep. DS went down at 12 eventually...then ta daaaaa it was 6.30! Was up with DD at 3 ish though. Always 1 is up....thingggggggss can only get betteerrrrrr...

I did leave DS to cry a few minutes last night...out of desperation....did nothing though! Around 4 months if the rock and plonk as eyes droop method doesn't work before that. Give me patience (correct sp?) I'm just so rubbish at this.

KAY XXX


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## hakunamatata

gosh you guys deserve an award!!!! hope you all got some sleep xx


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## amandaloo

aya ladies

any snow where you are?  

Spaykay- Your not rubbish  

MM- Hope your night wasnt too long   and hope you get rid of your pesky virus soon  

Can I interupt and slightly change the subject just wanted some advice really  . My DS is 5 and a half month old . He used to sleep from 730 till 5am-6am  for quite some time (very lucky I know), I used to get and odd 4am but wasnt often. I started weaning him around 4 month old....Anyway hes started to wake at 4am and hes drinking a full bottle then going back to sleep...Recently hes been having bottle at 4am breakfast at 8ish and bottle, dinner and bottle tea then bottle then bottle before bed....Hes drinking his full bottles of 6oz and eating all his food. My question is Im wondering what quantity food he should be having now as Im wondering if hes still hungry and thats why hes waking up?? I tried a bit of supper last night but it made no difference however it is early days....Hes been having 3 ice cubes of food is that enough do you think. I cant seem to find anything about quantity of food anywhere?? I dont want to overfeed him thats why Im wondering what others have done? I know every baby is different but would like to hear others viewpoints please


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## carrie lou

Ooh lots of us having bad nights  Zac decided he didn't want to settle properly until I went to bed at 10 last night, but miraculously he is still up and ready to start the day at 6am   

Amanda - it is confusing, I'm still not sure how much I should be feeding Zac. He has 5 BFs during the day in addition to his 3 solid meals. At the moment he is having a bowl of baby rice for breakfast, and usually 2 cubes of veg and 2 of fruit for lunch and dinner. I'm thinking of slowly increasing this but I find he doesn't really know what full feels like yet, he will keep eating until he is sick  so going to increase the quantities really gradually. At this age I think they are still getting most of what they need from milk so there's no rush really. And in my experience feeding more doesn't improve their sleep sadly


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## Spaykay

I used to give DD as much food as she's eat I think, so if she took more solid then I gave it. I'm afraid I went cold turkey on night feeds....she'd slept through for so long that when she started waking at 5 months I thought no way was I feeding again. She cried 2 nights and then went through again. I wish these babies could talk and tell us what they want!

Someone is awake...i cuold¡ve gone back to bed if I'd known he'd sleep in this morning!!! Boobed him at 6.30 and he's waking now at 9. Cheeky minx! Wish I could just enjoy the cuddles more but the sleep deprivation is just not my cup of tea!!! Ha ha...like anyone actulaly likes it!

Kay xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

We went to Baby Sensory Christmas party yesterday and it upset the new routine cause he was so tired afterwards he slept from 3.45 to 6pm so was also late with his feeds.

So I decided to do bedtime a bit later (been taking him up after Bedtime Hour on TV at 7 for the last week). Took him up at 8 ish and did bath and massage etc as normal, fed him, which he drank and put him in bed. Held hand for a while and he would not sleep. So I told him I'd be back and went down to put some food on for us. When I crept back up he was sleeping.
Didn't last though as he was wide awake at 1am with the snuffles and no amount of hand holding or shushing worked, so he had another feed and then slept with a couple of grumbes I did not have to get up for until 8.30am when he awoke quietly chatting to himself and smiling at Daddy.
Think he has more snuffles today and gunk starting in his eye. Oh dear!

Need to go in garden and sort out patio and plant bulbs, but not sure if he will let me. Managed an hour the other day with him in the doorway in his bouncer wrapped up in a blanket and hat.

As for solid food - very difficult. The HV told my friend to feed until satisfied, but it does rely on you reading the signs of refusal correctly, which I am told can be tricky in some babies   But she has a baby who is the same - does not know when she is full and will eat until she is sick. Perhaps it is like us - we should eat slowly and eat over a period of time so that we can get the right signals of fullness. Of course I have absolutely no idea how Charley will feed or how much he will eat as we haven't started weaning yet. My friend's boys were very good at saying when full on purees and the other friend did baby led weaning and the girls were very good with that too. I don't know the answer!


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## juju81

Noah went in his bed at 3 weeks too! In his own room, like Mini and in the dark......I didnt want him to get used to certain ways!.....it is a personal choice but I would prefer a night or 2 or cc and having our own room back then co-sleeping.  

Carrie, sounds like he's got far to comfy in your bed.  Its not going to hurt him to cry for a bit and I dont believe for 1 minute that leaving kids to cry can lead to mental health issues!  Whatever next      It honestly doesnt take too long getting them sleeping through, it sounds horrendous at the time but he's not going to hate you for it     Maybe just give it a go for a few nights?  Could you really not handle it for a night or 2.  

With regards to the weaning, I'd give them a bit more until they push it away! or are sick, then next time you know when to stop.  Try them on toast or something as long as they are 6months plus.  I cant even remember weaning Noah now, feels like a lifetime ago!


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## Spaykay

A. went in his big bed at 3 weeks but I'm in the room as can't be arsed to move rooms tofeed hom each time he wakes.

Kay zxx


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## carrie lou

No I really can't handle it Ju    i tried CC for one night last week, Zac cried so much he was sick all over his bedding and I ended up in tears too and exhausted. I know it sounds crazy but I'd rather carry on co-sleeping for now than do CC again. I honestly don't know whether CC has long term effects or not (the evidence seems to be mixed) but for the sake of my sanity I don't want to do it at the moment. Maybe when he is a little older I will reconsider but I'm happy with how I'm doing things for now.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Re weaning. I was worried I gave him too much. But we did blw. I remember bring petrified of giving him a whole pot of yoghurt   but yeah milk is still the main food. 

Re waking at night and milk. We were lucky as he stopped his milk at night at 6 wks   when he's woken up ice tried milk but he just doesn't want it.  When he's not eaten in the day I've been worried he'll wake but he doesn't. I've tried the cereal before bed but makes no difference at all  

Maybe try to reduce the amount of milk at 4am to a few ounces every few nights. I know once they are in 3 meals a day you should reduce milk in day and replace with water in a cup. That's what the hv advise us anyway. I remember trying to feed his 3pm feed but he just didn't want it once he was 6 months. He was down to 2 feeds a day   but he's fine and dandy. 

Our night was ok thankfully   think it was his teeth.


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## speeder

we have snow! but I don't want it!  .  it's too cold here to take dd out. 

mini - sympathy - I have had the same virus for weeks too. I normally don't get colds so it's v frustrating! I am munching garlic and onion and stink but nothing is finally shifting it! 

re weaning - if ds is having all that milk in the night I would def say up the day time food. you want to break that new routine ASAP! some folk advocate just giving a little water at night instead so they eat more next day. if ds is being given healthy foods I think it's hard to overfeed. I fed dd till she was full - I.e. didnt want more and that varies hugely day to day depending whether they are having a growth spurt, I'll etc. also full fat cheese etc is very healthy for them as they need way more fat than us. sometimes they can fill up on too many fruit purees but need something more substantial. a fab book I love is annabel karmel - feeding your baby and toddler. I didn't know some babies would not stop when full! maybe their wee tummies just getting used to solids? 

just been for reflexology - amazing - she pressed all the points to get things moving so fingers crossed....

ps Kay - I find sleep deprivation hard too - who wouldn't! hope you coping xx


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## amandaloo

Thanks everyone for your advice much appreciated      

Ive decided im going to up his food in day to 4 ice cubes of food instead of 3 and try supper again. Ive got annabel Karmels book speeder but its the meal planner one with receipes in i love the book ive made lots of her receipes...Like you say I dont want him to get into a 4am routine...yawn yawn. Ps I really struggle giving DS water he hates it ive tried loads of times... He will have a few sips of water and sugar free cordial but thats minimal. I cant imagine him having that at 4am


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Can you dilute the milk until it is just water, doing it gradually?
It is ok to dilute milk but not to make it stronger.


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## juju81

Bless u carrie   he definitely knows how to tug on ur heart strings doesn't he   maybe I'm just super biatch mum    I hope for ur sake were not still here in 2yrs time with zac still in ur bed lol   could u imagine that? I'm sure there are woman out there!!!!  

Parenting can be so hard sometimes, just gotta go with what u want and what ur happy with. If there was one thing I'd do differently if I had my time again....not introduce....














Toy story


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## carrie lou

I love Toy Story!

No you are not super biatch mum at all, we just all make our own parenting choices, no one is right or wrong, it's just doing what's best for you and your own situation.  

Yes I have heard of kids sleeping in their parents' bed until the age of 4 ... but that's not going to happen to us! For one thing I'm hoping to have baby No 2 by then so probably he/she will be sleeping with us instead!


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## juju81

"There were 4 in the bed and the little one said....." . Surely at that age it must affect ur love life  . I'm sure one day he'll just sleep through and then u can then just start putting him down in his cot. We've got dummygate to start maybe this time next year......I'm going cold turkey on that......maybe   

I loved toy story 2 wkd ago....I'm not joking when I say but its on ALL day long   he'll appreciate the buzz we have him for Christmas now tho!!


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## juju81

Carrie, just realised zac is 6months. Would u give BLW a go? Proper food as opposed to purée? See if that helps??


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## carrie lou

Been doing a little BLW in addition to his purees but he doesn't eat much that way. I don't hold out much hope  

I'm thinking if I can fit a mattress on the nursery floor I can lie down in there with him until he's asleep, then sneak back to our bed... it's one way of moving him to his own room with as little stress as possible!


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## juju81

Yeah to be honest I never did solely blw, I'd give him purees first then let him play...he cant get enough of pasta and pesto these days! He's more a grazer, maybe that's the way zac will go when he's a bit older!

My friends used to sit in their room whilst Lewis fell asleep....there'd quite often fall asleep themselves  . I suppose if it's not bothering u then who are we to say anything about it  

Am watching some bread making program   waiting for I'm a celeb the coming out show!


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## Fizzypop

Got a feeling I'm going to have a greedy eat til she's sick baby when weaning. She has always taken whatever she's given and then promptly chucked it up if too much (normally over daddy who is then fighting off dog who wants to help clear up, lol!

On the sleep debate - Carrie, I know you are happy with what you are doing - but just wanted to add my twopenneth that is I don't think a little bit of cc or whatever will lead to mental health etc problems. I think prolonged lack of affection/being ignored will lead to issues but not bubbas that are loved like our little cherubs (most of the time!!) The reason I have given myself the first 3 months to do whatever is because of a theory called the fourth trimester, and basically that babies aren't developed enough to "play" us. But now she's nearly 3 months the thought of being tough fills me with dread! DH keeps telling me off for doing things via its easier, ie if I think she doesn't like something I stop doing it! I even struggle to get the dog to obey me at times!!! However think if she made herself sick like Zach I too would be the same as Carrie! 

Btw as I write this I'm cuddling the baby to sleep


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Amanda they will just sip the water at first. Keep trying it in a cup and eventually they'll take it. Do the same with cows milk in a cup once they are on it. 

Hazel you shouldn't water down milk. I'd reduce the amount every few days. And up the food in the day.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Why? It is no different to giving a bottle of regular strength formula and then giving a cup of water straight after as a top up drink..... it just mixes in the stomach then. As long as it is not a new born requiring full nutrition from milk where it would be wrong, then I can't see why. I did read it in one of the weaning books the other day too. Perhaps they are wrong? It was only a suggestion to try and get plain water taken as a drink at meal times, not a suggestion to replace the milk feeds. Specific milk feeds should be regular strength.


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## speeder

is it something to do with making sure they don't fill up too much on non-nutritious food? to make sure they take sufficient calories? 

I am laughing as yday dd, like everyone else, slept rubbishly and woke ridiculously early and in desperation I took her in with me - something I have not done for months. and even then hardly ever. in true [email protected]@itch mum style (like that new phrase)  I don't talk to her at all, just one kiss on the cheek, no eye contact and she was back to sleep. 

I have a lovely - slightly unusual - friend who still has her 2.5 year old in bed with her - but she is still breast feeding him too and I find it all a bit odd! each to their own I guess! 

we have well and truly hit tantrum phase with dd. it's weird seeing your angelic easy peasy little daughter transform into a little monster. we have now agreed a strategy of ignoring her completely during a tantrum which is working - but I find hard - way harder than cc for me......  

xx


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## amandaloo

Aya ladies

Well won't speak to soon but he slept until 6am so 11hrs ) . So I'm hoping he's back on track fingers crossed .

Hazel- It says on my sma tin in bold do not add extra powder or water to make feeds stronger or weaker and do not press powder into scoop . Using too much or too little powder could make your baby ill .


----------



## pheobs1

Sorry to jump in. Im a bit all over the place. Had our scan at our clinic yesterday. One of my little angels looks perfect, measuring bang on and was waving at us like crazy. Unfortunately my second little angel gave up sometime last week by looking at the dates. So looms like the midwife cow was psychic. I'm all over the place, happy for my little fighter waving, heartbroken about loosing my angel, guilty for thinking twins would be hard and petrified about loosing this one. I'm a mess


----------



## hakunamatata

oh pheobs im just so sorry hun, but nothing you will have felt or said would influence this. a friend of mine lost her little fighter and is now 33 weeks with a singleton. hang onto what you can and dont give up hope yet, tho a protective bubble might be good. sorry if ive said the wrong thing. i take it you have another scan soon to monitor? always here for you hun. will pray your iccle one is just a wee bit slow xx


----------



## Fizzypop

Someone in my NCT group last week told us what hazel said about do not make it stronger but can make it weaker if they are constipated. Not sure where she got that info from but will try to remember to ask. She also gave her newborn majorly diluted prune juice when he had constipation. Not something I would think was okay but this was on drs advice!!!

Oh Pheobs, we have posted at the same time. Can't believe what I am reading xxx what has happened is very unusual, and you have one beanie that is fighting strong. What we go through to get our little bubbas makes the early days even more difficult but believe that you will have your baby in your arms in a few months. Every morning for the first 12 weeks I wished away the days, then when that happened I wished away the days till 5 months, then to 24 weeks and it wasn't until about 29 weeks that I actually started relaxing a bit!!!


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks both.
Hakunah no hope to hold on to for the little one, there was a heartbeat at 7 weeks and nothing yesterday :-(
My other beanie really was perfect and kept waving like mad as if to tell me look I'm ok and measured spot on for the first time - this one always measured about 5 days smaller and my second a bit smaller again.
I've got a scan on Monday for my sake more than anything else. Our clinic ate amazing and I could go in everyday if I wanted (no charge) to put my mind at rest. The consultant saidtue baby looked perfect. It's just so bitter sweet xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

sorry babe, so glad you have your iccle beanie wanting to impress his mummy. only time will heal honey xxxx so sorry


----------



## amandaloo

Pheobs- you know I've pm'd you just wanted to say on the board how sorry I am  . It's so sad    You have what sounds like a little fighter on board and he/she is staying strong for mummy and letting you know  . Nothing I say will ever make it better but time  like hakuna says it's a great healer


----------



## juju81

Phoebs     ive been in ur shoes altho granted it wasn't a twin preg. There are a few if u unfortunately who feel ur pain.  Please stay   for ur fighting bubba. She sounds like a fighter. Take each day as it comes. There are also others who have lost one twinnie and gone on to term and given birth to a healthy singleton.


----------



## carrie lou

Oh Pheobs hun I'm so sorry to read your news. I've not been in your position but I can imagine it must be a real mixture of emotions, grieving for the little one you lost but pleased to be holding on to the little fighter. All I can say is try to take care of yourself and look after that strong little bean that's doing so well. Really sorry honey, I hope you're OK.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pheobs   so sorry hun. Just try and think of it as the little spirit will always be within your little fighter.


----------



## Lindz

Pheobs,    So so so sorry to hear that. Nothing i can addto what the other ladies have said but your beanie does sound strong and measuring perfectly and there is no reason why anything else should happen. Great that your clinic are being so supportive. Take care xxx


----------



## pinkcat

I am so sorry Pheobs      Thinking of you


----------



## Ju2006

Pheobs - so sorry to hear your news, I have been in your situation.  Our scan at 7wks showed twins and then at 9wks it was only one......that strong one is now having her morning nap upstairs....she is 16mths now !  Be strong and concentrate on that lil bubba you have that is growing stronger day by day.

to all those with constipated babies here is a tip, give them a carton of formula (obviously only the oz's that they would normally have) through the day, this will help loosen them up.  Or you can try a drop of fresh OJ in some cooled boiled water, you only need a drop.....works wonders ! 

Much love to all


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - so sorry darling. This can happen - so sorry. It is really sad. I sometimes think as IVF patients we know too much too early on and this makes everything so much harder. Everything will be ok with your perfect little bubba I'm sure     

Amanda - I am sure the warning is about when the formula is the sole source of nutrition in the first 6 months, as there are some people out there who think it is too expensive and they put less scoops in or think the baby needs more.  Yes in those cases there will be disastrous effects and no one would ever suggest that in that instance. But once you are weaning and winding down to giving 1 pint of regular strength formula a day plus three square meals and water for a drink at meal times, then it does not make any sense that you could not put a little formula powder in water to make it palatable, and gradually eliminate it to get water accepted as a drink. It would only be the same nutritionally at that meal as making baby rice with formula milk and then giving water in a cup as a drink. The stomach does not know that the water was previously in a cup and the formula was in the bowl with the baby rice.


----------



## carrie lou

I have heard of watering down formula to gradually wean off night feeds - I thought it was perfectly OK but as I'm not formula feeding I'm only going by what I've read  It makes sense to me though, as long as baby is growing well and having enough nutrition throughout the rest of the day.


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks everyone. I've just Started spotting and it is pinky red. They told me thus may happen but said it was unlikely. I'm absolutely terrified now that it's something happening to my little fighter.
To top it off, the stress has brought on a cold sore too. Can't see me lasting til Monday for a scan, I feel sick with nerves everytime I go to the loo xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Oh Pheobs  Can you get a scan sooner? I'm sure your little "fighter" bean is fine but it will help put your mind at rest.


----------



## speeder

Phoebs - massive hug - thinking of you. the stress won't be good for you or the baby honey - I know it doesn't help to hear that - but why not phone the clinic just to set your mind at rest. xxxxxx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Oh Phoebs - I have heard of people losing one sac and having a bleed. It could also be a bit of cervical irritation from the scan probe and all the pregnancy hormones making things more sensitive. Try not to think the worst


----------



## hopingagain

Pheobs I have pm'd you but just wanted to say I am thinking of you and praying that your little fighter will stay strong for mummy xx give the clinic a ring hun as they would rather you go in and put your mind at rest xx

AFM sorry I not been around but at the moment baby has reflux whichis resulting in projectile vomit after every feed and when I put her down which leaves us with very little sleep as she is usually sick within half hour of being down. Things are improving with medication of the doc and luckily my mum is staying at the mo so I am making use of her and getting some much needed sleep when I can. However I do read to keep up with you all. Xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Phoebs hun that sounds so scary          it is most likely your uterus expanding to fit in two babies and bleeding a bit from the stretching which is really common. Can you hassle your clinic to re-scan you or go to the local early pregnancy unit at your local hospital? They should see you within 24 hours if your GP phones them (or some you can just turn up) and explain you have bleeding in a twin pg. waiting for a scan is torture and hope you can sort it out asap and all is well                 

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Ceci, phoebs had some news at the scan and unfortunately lost a heartbeat


----------



## ceci.bee

Thanks Ju for letting me know - I had missed that - phoebs I am so sorry          I hope your little fighter is ok in there


----------



## amandaloo

Pheobs- hope you are ok thinking of you 

Thanks for comments about the milk everyone


----------



## speeder

it's gone v quiet here. Phoebs - been thinking of you honey and hope you got some reassurance x

Afm - I am fine - feel like this baby will be late and so so want to avoid induction - was induced last time and it was fine - but they want to avoid in case it contributed to the bleed I had. 

so I am on rasp leaf tea, curries, walking, squatting, pineapple, baths and nothing is happening! sweep on Tuesday. any other tips?!? slightly sadly I wondered if dh and I have sex - are there still prostaglandins there if he is azoospermic? 

love to everyone - hope you are all happy and well and feeling xmassy

x


----------



## carrie lou

Hi Speeder, as you know I went 2 weeks overdue and had to be induced. I tried EVERYTHING to persuade Zac to come sooner but I'm not convinced anything worked really  but then induction wasn't nearly as bad as I'd expcted. Not sure about the prostaglandins but it's got to be worth a try  Anyway whatever happens you will have a lovely little bubba by Christmas, so exciting    


Pheobs hope you are OK  


Good morning everyone else, hope you are all well


----------



## pheobs1

Hi speeder, hope you get sone activity soon!

Thank you everyone for your support, it is invaluable to me xxx

Still spotting, had a scan in our clinic yesterday and the bleed is coming from our little angel. Our little fighter looks really happy with no bleeds around him/her. He/she was VERY active, waving and dancing around. It was so amazing to see and such a relief, but so bitter sweet because I'm also crying for the baby we've lost. Going back for another scan there next week. I am so lucky that they are such a caring clinic.
SIL is really starting to get on my nerves, lots of comments implying that I should basically get over it because I've got another baby. I am so grateful and know how lucky I am to still have a baby, but that doesn't make my grief for our other baby any less. Grrr

Sorry for the me post again. Xxx


----------



## speeder

oh my darling - you have lost a baby and no one should tell you how to feel - give yourself time to grieve. I am so happy other beanie is well xxxxx

thanks carrie x


----------



## pheobs1

I know, she's ways been a cow and has always had everything on a plate and uike some of us she thankfully has never felt this loss. DH is really supportive though and said that if she says anything again he will tell her straight or anyone else, so that's nice. 

Xxx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - I think there will be prostaglandins if there is seminal fluid (azoospermic rather than aspermic) TMI   As I understand it the prostaglandins are in the prostate fluid. I could be wrong though. Might be worth a try anyway.

Phoebs - you take time to grieve darling.  Yes you still have a baby in there, which is and will be wonderful, but you have lost the hopes and dreams you started to have for twins. You will be happy in the end, but will never forget your angel. We never forget our angels. I went to a Christmas service of love and rememberance for the lost babies yesterday and remembered Beanie. I have to say I got through it this year much better. I was a wreck the last two years and could hardly see the order of service by the first hymn for tears. This year was so much easier - whether it is because I have gone through the 2 years of grief when things are supposed to ease, or having Charley. Maybe a combination. I remembered all the lost FF angels while I was there.


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks Hazel. DH is going to buy me a locket that we can put our little photo in. I can wear it at special times, my friend brought me a beautiful little angel pin last nigt too. My two close friends have been amazing, they understand. Again I really appreciate all your kind thoughts and support. It will be a long week until scan next Friday, I'm just so lucky that we are able to do it wih our clinic xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Oh Pheobs, of course you are grieving. It must be a strange situation and bittersweet as you say. But don't let anyone tell you how to feel. You have to grieve for the twin that didn't make it and re-adjust your vision of the future from planning for 2 babies to just one. It will take time. So pleased to hear that your little beanie is doing so well. It's amazing when you see them dancing around on the screen, I remember seeing Zac like that - seems like such a long time ago now!  Anyway look after yourself


----------



## Spaykay

My goodness-u csn't just replace a lost baby with another hun ((())) Angel will alwYs hold a special place in ur heart. 

Kay xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

Phoebs hun         i can't believe how insensitive your SIL is - you need to grieve. I think no one knows what to say when you suffer a pg loss, but the sensitive ones just let you know they are there for you - and the insensitive ones come out with all sorts of stuff. I got a lot of 'at least you can get pg now'      and the suchlike. DizzyD who used to post on the NOA thread also lost a twin at a later gestation than you, and she might be a good person to PM to chat about how she got through it. We are all here for you hun and am so pleased the other twin is doing well         

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks ceci xxx


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## sweetdreams73

pheobs - I am so so very sorry for your sad loss sweetheart,   , its just so so very cruel and unfair and sending you huge amounts of     to you and your DH... so glad your other twin is doing great... take care lots of love xxx


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## chrispx

Pheobs- just logged in and seen your news, so sorry Hun....  take time to grieve and don't listen to that SIL of yours. You will feel a mixture of emotions, stay strong. x


----------



## chrispx

Oh and guys about the co sleeping, I slept with my mum until I was 15


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




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## carrie lou

Chrispx    Now I don't feel so bad!


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## Lindz

He he Carrie but will you be saying that in 14 years?!! Up til we were teenagers my Mum would make one of us sleep in her bed if Dad was away for the night with work    I've had both of mine in bed with us at various stages but don't really anymore. They sleep better in their own cots apart from when they're ill and i sneak them in without DH noticing.
I've been looking for the remote control for about an hour, Last seen in DS's paws at 7:30 this morning, grrr! I wonder if like a squirrel he'll retrieve it when he gets up from his nap...


----------



## Spaykay

Trying to get DS in own cot witjout sleeping in arms...ended up in with me at 5am and on me at 8.30. Had his injections though so felt cruel to leave him!

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lindz I spent the whole day looking for my phone yesterday thanks to Ds


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## chrispx

DD sleeps much better in our bed and we all get good nights sleep, I've decided I just need a 6ft bed..  
my dad worked away and mum used to put me in her bed (I'm sure she was frightened to sleep alone) and I was there until 15..he he.
Carrie- im sure when they start dating they'll go in there own beds


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## Spaykay

chrisp - ewwww, I'd hope so!!!! So yuo started dating at 15 vthen?


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## pheobs1

To be honest, I'm 30 and my dad works away and I still welcome any opportunity to hop into bed with my mother! Xx


----------



## carrie lou

Chrispx I joke with DH that by the time Baby No 2 comes along, we might as well get a king size mattress, put it on the floor, and the whole family sleep in one room - it's just easier all round  

Actually, when DH was in hospital I really enjoyed cuddling up with Zac every night


----------



## chrispx

Carrie- when my dh went away with work for a week me and dd starfished in the bed   so I think my solution is get the dh in the cot...  

Spaykay- 16   but by 15 I thought enough was enough..  

Pheobs- nothing better than a mums cuddle.


----------



## Spaykay

Ha ha...yeh, DH adked if I wanted to sleep with him last night.... Urm nope! DS snores less and is more cuddly . Asleep on me right now infact

Kay xxx


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## speeder

dd wakes every day at 530 to talk about Santa coming and will only go back to sleep cuddled in with me. this is such a bad habit to be getting into although I love these early morning cuddles.

Kay - totally agree re sleeping with dh!!


----------



## hakunamatata

speeder how are you feeling, i see youre overdue now xx


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## speeder

my waters have just broken!!


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## pheobs1

Aarghhhh! Good luck Speeder! Xxx


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## ceci.bee

OMG speeder good luck!!!!! let us know how you get on when it is all through and you are a mummy!!! Fingers crossed for a smooth non-bleeding birth

love Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Good luck


----------



## Spaykay

hope all's going well Speeder!

Kay xxx


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## speeder

beautiful baby girl born this morning - 8 pounds five - we are over the moon - no bleeding and all went well. will post more soon! xxxxxx


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## amandaloo

Congratulations speeder yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy well done you xx


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## carrie lou

Congratulations Speeder, thrilled for you and so glad it went well! Just so you know, she shares a birthday with my little bro who is 23 today  Hope everything is going well


----------



## pheobs1

Congratulations speeder! You go girl! So chuffed it all went well xx


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## ceci.bee

Fab Phoebs that is great am so pleased for you!! Really pleased no bleeding and seems v quick if you are posting less than 24 hours after water breaking    fab weight enjoy being a family of 4!

lots of love
Ceci  

ps all have been reading the co-sleeping chat with a    and now feel terrible Joshi has always slept in his own cot and moved out of our room at 6 months - am I a terrible mother


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## carrie lou

Ceci of course you are not a terrible mother!  I never planned to co-sleep but then I didn't realise I was going to have a baby who woke anything from 3-5 times a night (sometimes more) even at the age of 6 months! To settle him in his cot every time he wakes would take up to an hour each time so I would get virtually no sleep and just can't function like that. So we co-sleep more from necessity than choice. If he slept through the night I would have no hesitation in moving him to his own room.


----------



## Fizzypop

Fab news speeder xxx


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## chrispx

Speeder- congrats on the birth of your little girl, glad all went ok.

Ceci- no that's fab joshi sleeps on his own, you are lucky...we only do it too to get sleep.

Hope everyone ok.

Got a quick question my dd is one in jan (time does fly) and was wondering about follow on milk, do I just change over when she is one? Or do I have to do it gradual? Is the milk any different?


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## hopingagain

Congratulations speeder glad the birth went well xx welcome to the world baby girl xx


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## juju81

Speeder whoooo hoooo congrats lovely

Ceci, Noah was 3 wks  

Crispx, we jut swapped Noah's milk at 10months   straight onto cows milk and he took it no problem. Very baby is idifferent. Some take it some don't. I personally wouldn't bother with follow on milk, it's just the companies trying to make more money out of us....cows milk has everything they need


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ceci that makes me an even worse mother cos ds was in his own room at 3 wks, in his cot at 6 wks and I let him cry for a while.   shock horror!! 
It can take up to 2 hrs to settle him if he wakes in the night. each to their own. I personally worldnt co-sleep due to the risks Plus I can't sleep with him in the same room as me  

Chrispy just give him cows milk. We did like pink cat did. After a couple of days he didn't know any different so we just went onto cows. Toddler milk is just a marketing ploy.  

I would start giving him milk in a cup in the day too so he gets used to it. He'll find it strange at first but keep giving it and he'll eventually take it.  

Congrats speeds. So happy to hear u didn't bleed. There's hope for me!!


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## juju81

I just did Noah cold turkey on cows milk    

I get p'd off having nick in my bed let alone Noah ha ha luckily he's never liked being in our bed anyway!!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No ds doesn't either.   I think we only did half and half for a couple if days. Think he would of taken it from day 1 tho.


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## hakunamatata

congratulations speeder thats fantastic news. so glad you didnt have the bleeding scare either. cant wait to hear more xx


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## Spaykay

EG gave up the boob at 11 months by her choice so we went straight onto cow's milk in a sippy cup. Took her a while to take, but there was no other choice! I will hope to do this with DS at 10 months as he'll start Nursery and has never had a bottle (hoping that won't change) I will start putting my milk in a cup to get him used to that first. That's the plan anyway!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Kay that is my plan too  Zac won't take a bottle but I've started giving him water in sippy cup with his meals. Hoping to BF up to 1 year then straight onto cow's milk.


----------



## chrispx

Thanks....cows milk it is.

Pinkcat- sorry for sounding thick but do you mean mix the cows milk with formula?

She drinks out of a cup no problem, if she doesn't drink all her bottle I put the rest of milk in a cup. She is still having 3 bottles a day...first thing, afternoon about 2pm & then bed...would you just keep the same with cows milk?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Chrispy I would let her or u drop the 2pm bottle and just give water and milk through the day in a cup. Then later on change the morning one to a cup of milk then the night one. U can only try these things. By the time Ds was 9 months he'd dropped all feeds in day and just had am and pm feeds. But all babies are different. 

Once they drop feeds it becomes alot more casual. u can give water and milk whenever in the day.


----------



## Spaykay

I honestly can't rememebr what I did with the times of milk. If they want it then give it, if not then don't worry. My HV told me how her son refused for months and EG was exactly the same. The 1st 3 months she hardly had milk but had yogurt and cheese so I didn't worry.

DS having a super nap in his moses basket  He's so full of cough n cold the poor love. I've been up since 5.30 am, didn't know he's have a nap and I could've showered, napped, partied etc etc. We do have to go out to finish dome CHRISTMAS shopping though so waiting for him to wake. 

Kay xxx


----------



## chrispx

Thanks will give it ago soooon  

Also when do you start giving tap water?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

from 6 months hun. Don't give bottled water.


----------



## carrie lou

I've been giving cooled boiled tap water since started weaning - thought it was OK


----------



## Spaykay

Again ...I can't remember


----------



## chrispx

Yea carrie I give cool boiled water, was wondering when can give it just out the tap?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah that's fine carrie but u shouldn't give bottled water cos of the salt intake. Tap is fine from 6 months.


----------



## carrie lou

Oh OK. No I've never given bottled water, don't even drink it myself


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

But u can after a year


----------



## spooks

Congratulations speeder and family

love and season's greetings to everyone  
everything going well with me


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder          

Don't be thrown by my name change, there are reasons!

Thank goodness for no bleeding.

We were told at weaning classes that you can carry on with first milks for all of the first year if you want to or change to follow on milk from 6 months if you want to. Toddler and growing up milk are from 1 year and 2 years.

The difference between 1st milk and follow on milk is the whey protein/ casein ratios. Early baby milks are formulated to be better tolerated in the gut, and you can carry on with them if your baby is happy on them. If you do change to follow on milk until they can have cows milk from 12 months, the only advantage that I can see is that the supermarkets can give you offer prices and loyalty points to save money on milks from 6 months, whereas they are not allowed to offer promotions or discounts on milks for under 6 months due to the government laws on encouraging breast feeding. They can also advertise follow on milks so it is in the company's interest to have a follow on formula that they can market in the hope that if you are looking for a formula before 6 months their name will be known to you when you are looking on the shelf. There is no reason to change unless you want to.

We were told that water should be boiled/cooled until 1 year and can be offered at meal times from 6 months. If they are cutting back on milk feeds too quickly then to use formula to mix foods.


----------



## juju81

Spooks.....wow 20wks when are u due??


----------



## carrie lou

Spooks, glad everything is well with you  


This weaning thing is confusing isn't it ... how do you know if baby is cutting down on milk feeds too fast?  Zac has recently dropped from 5 to 4 and I think he might soon drop to 3 milk feeds a day - but then he is still having a feed at night and some EBM mixed in with his food. I asked the HV for advice but she just said "be guided by him" - that's not very clear is it


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly i have to disagree with the tap water. It is from 6 months that you can give non boiled water. Here is the qoute from NHS website. DS had tap water from 6 months and hes fine.



> Water: fully breastfed babies don't need any water until after they've started eating solid food. Bottle-fed babies may need some extra water in hot weather. For babies under six months, use water from the mains tap in the kitchen that's been boiled then cooled. Water for babies over six months doesn't need to be boiled. If you have to use bottled water, choose one labelled as suitable for infants or which has less than 200mg of sodium per litre. Bottled water is not sterile, so it will need to be boiled and cooled if you're giving it to a baby under six months.


Carrie i would be guided by him like the HV said. DS dropped to 2 feeds by the time he was 7-8 months. I was trying to basically force him to feed  thinking he needed it, i went to the HV and she said you can't force it and we must be doing something right with the BLW as he just didn't want it. She said as long as hes getting milk in cereal and yoghurts and give him vitamins then he'll be fine. He was still putting on weight and still is. Once he'd got used to a cup he was having milk in that to replace the bottle.


----------



## Spaykay

Well DS has just gone 2 days with very little milk at it appears he's survived!!!! Back on the boob today thanj goodness (and all through the night grrrr!!!!) He also screamed through playgroup Christmas party. DD had fun and so,meone told me I must have stolen her as she's nothing like me....hmmmmmmm.....

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## chrispx

Thanks for the quote mini....dd has had tap water from today


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

things get much easier once they reach 6 months.


----------



## Spaykay

MM - that's what I keep telling myself YAaaaaaaWWWN!!!

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

and me!!!


----------



## carrie lou

And me ... but Z is nearly 7 months now and no sign of getting easier yet! My mum says once they start to crawl is a real turning point, so I live in hope...


----------



## pheobs1

Morning all, hope you all had a good weekend?
I was looking for some tips on sleeping?  I read that you shouldn't sleep on your back while pg, so I'm sleeping on my side, trouble is I'm getting terrible pains in my hips/thighs from doing it, I'm awake every twenty minutes or so to switch sides and the pain in my legs keeps me awake for a while. I've tried a pillow between my legs, any tips are welcome xxxxxxx


----------



## carrie lou

Hi Pheobs, I think that only applies later on in pregnancy when you're big and heavy and it becomes really uncomfortable to lie on your back, also there is a risk the weight of your bump can squash important blood vessels  but at your stage it shouldn't be a problem yet. If you are comfy sleeping on your back then I think it should still be fine. When I was heavily pregnant, I slept propped up on loads of pillows, it was the only way I could get comfy  Just go with whatever works for you, you will know when it's time to stop sleeping on your back


----------



## amandaloo

Pheobs- I think Carrie is right it's when you are heavier when it makes a difference  .. You can get them maternity cushion things they go around your bump and between your legs . Some pll swear by them but I couldn't get used to it . Dreamgenni or mum e pillow . Have a look on google . Hope you are ok haven't had much time recently to post etc x


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks girls, you read so much and I'm extra paranoid since loosing one of my babies xx


----------



## Fizzypop

Pheobs - ditto what Amanda and Carrie said. I slept on my back until about 20 weeks I think and moved onto side. When very pregnant I slept in a sort of lounging sitting/laying position with about 8 pillows! My problem was I used to roll onto my back in my sleep, lol! We've got a memory foam mattress and although I found I still got uncomfortable, it was nowhere near the dead leg I go when sleeping on a normal mattress so if you get really desperate try a memory foam mattress topper!

I'm off out for works Xmas lunch today - 3rd time DD left with daddy in 2 weeks


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah don't worry at this early stage. Its when u get heavier and I think the risk is u will just feel faint if u lie on your back. They say yiu should lie On left side. If I lie on right side it feels funny.   I often fall onto my back. I'm not too worried about it. I've got a pg pillow for I between legs but last time I found it got in the way. I haven't used it yet this time. I did find I needed a wedge for under bump to support it tho. Again not needed yet. Maybe I'm smaller this time


----------



## speeder

Thanks for all the good wishes!  My beautiful new baby girl is lying next to me on the bed next to the window (a bit jaundiced so hoping that the weak December Scottish light might shift it, fat chance...)

Hopefully my birth experience this time will give hope to anyone who had a rubbish time first time around too (especially a haemorrhage).  Anyway, my waters broke in the evening and we dashed to the hospital (who didn't want us to hang around at home) and then had a very frustrating 8 hours of lots of regular contractions, increasingly painful and yet not increasing dilation beyond 4cm.  I thought I was doing everything right - moving, walking, yoga bla bla, deep breathing, relaxing...  By 4 in the morning it was clear that not much was going to happen and we spoke about inducement or even a csection in case baby was lying a strange way - no one could understand why I wasn't progressing.  Consultant was asked to arrive to talk through c-section procedure and at this point I'd given up having a natural delivery and was just lying on the bed having very few contractions and feeling miserable....  Consultant arrived, examined me and WOAH - by giving up altogether, my body had kick started itself and basically our baby started to arrive - three pushes and she was out! I've no idea how it happened but I went from 4cm dilated to delivery in about 4 contractions and 10 minutes....  I honestly feel by giving up and just lying on the bed feeling miserable my brain decided to get into gear and do what needed to be done!

Our beautiful daughter arrived at 5am, screaming her head off and I got the fright of my life as I was so so sure she was a boy!  We had 4 hours of amazing skin contact whilst I had further sytocin just in case I bled and it was a lovely time as there was no rush - just had this tiny little creature on my chest that I couldn't believe I'd finally met. 

I wondered whether love was halved when other children arrived and worried about bonding - but my love has doubled.  We feel incredibly blessed and happy to have been given two such lovely daughters after everything and it's the best Christmas present ever...

Mini - I also meant to add - and it might be rubbish - but I took myself off all Vitamin E from 32 weeks (basically stopped taking my multi-vits) as I'd read about some connection between Vit E and blood not clotting - no idea if that helped!

I still tore a little bit - second degree and it's infected - I guess I'm not a natural birthing woman - but compared to last time it's been a dream. I have also been surprised that it was quite hard to get breast feeding going - latching took a bit of remembering - baby girl and I have had to re-learn together but she's feeding well now.


Pheobe - I slept on my back quite a lot until term - it just felt more comfy - I think getting a good night's sleep is the main thing xx

Holly - I like the new name!  Very arboreal! 

On the milk chat, I've actually still got DD1 on formula, because I don't think she eats enough iron rich foods and so it's one way of getting extra iron into her.  I know it's expensive but I'm reluctant to pack it in just yet...

Much love to all for a happy Christmas with your bumps and babies xx


----------



## ceci.bee

Phoebs the thing about the weight of the baby pressing on blood vessels is on your blood vessel not the babies, so it mostly means that you can get dizzy if you stand up after lying on your back. It won't harm the baby at all. As you get bigger then you will quickly work out what is right for you in terms of sleeping and lying down - you will do anything to get comfy I promise - sounds like you already are (and lying on your back actually gets v uncomfortable later on anyway). THere are loads of products out there to help you get comfy lying on your side - if you can borrow some of mates or buy cheaply on amazon before investing 50 quid in something to help you. I found one of the corner pillows that I could wedge from between my knees to my boobs around the bump really helped to prop me up to sleep, and a good quality mattress makes a huge difference. Good luck

Speeder sorry you tore but otherwise it sounds amazing - and I hope DD1 is enjoying her new sister 

thanks for the reassurance over the co-sleeping thing ladies - I read an article about stress in new borns if they sleep apart from their mothers and got worried it lasted! My gorgeous boy is 8 months this week and have posted some more pics of him on our blog www.gavemandjoshi.blogspot.com along with some pics of the madness that is life in Africa.

ltos of love to all
Ceci 

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Speeds wow your birth was lovely. It made me blub    it's amazing what the body can do   I'm only iron tabs and folic acid. Last time I took the lot!! Can u divulge her name?


----------



## speeder

mini - I would love too as I think it's beautiful! - but have promised dh to stay anonymous - sigh! dh is beginning to open up to friends now so I hope one day it won't be a secret and it will just be the tale of the unusual way we had a family  

it's not long for you now! I can't believe I almost miss being pregnant - feel very teary (happy teary!) today - so will love to hear the preg chat from you preg girls!  who is next?!? 

xx


----------



## carrie lou

Speeder how lovely to hear such a positive birth story, and I'm so pleased it went well for you! Ah I remember the teary days, every time I looked at Z I burst into (happy) tears because I just felt so lucky and happy!  Enjoy it    


Ceci - such lovely photos of Joshi on your blog, he is a little cutie isn't he  and 9.4kg, wow! Mind you Zac was 8.6kg at 6 months so he's not far behind...


Pheobs  have you had 12 week scan yet?  (sorry I can't remember how far along you are now  )


----------



## pheobs1

Hi carie, had a Private scan at our clinic Friday for reassurance.'12 weeks today and have nhs scan Thursday xx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Speeds don;t worry hun, i don;t mention DSs name either anymore! Too many nosy parkers!    I will announce babies name once he arrives but that will be it! 

Pheobs - wow 12 weeks well done hun


----------



## Spaykay

I use initials for names too, not that anyone I know is on here...I don't think! Althoigh on ********, a FF friend turned out to be friends with one if my 'real' friends!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Pheobs 12 weeks, that's great hun


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

My sister is friends with someone who had ivf. I searched her kids names and found her on here. That's how I know how easy it is to be found. Since then I've stopped using names and haven't changed profile pic. Although I'd love to have a pic of him.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Mighty - thanks for the quote on the water. I think this is one of the reasons why everything is so hard - you get told different things all the time and the authorities keep changing the information. 
Many people still do not make up formula properly with boiled hot water. This is because they have changed the guidelines on formula prep so often that everyone is doing what they think. It also is not even consistent in the green book, saying that you have to use formula within a couple of hours on one page and 24 hours on the next page.

Anyway - Charley is 6 months old tomorrow - where did the time go?


----------



## speeder

happy 1/2th bday charley - where has the time gone!!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Wow that's quick!   

Keeping water in a flask seems to be the easiest way. I agree it's all a bit   I think common sense is all u need  

As u can see I'm up thanks to Ds who decided to have a tantrum at 1am


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## Spaykay

MM - poor you! Could he be having nightmares. I was up with you! At 1, 3, 5....urm...new born habits hun! You're 2 months now and were sleeping 6 hour slots!

Kay xxx


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## juju81

It's all just confusing. I just made them up the night before with cooled boiled water and then left them on the side and added the milk when needed. All I usedto carry around then was the bottle and a milk dispenser with the milk counted out.....none of this faffing with a hot jug or water/microwave (yes I heated his bedtime one up in te microwave and shook it vigorously) or a flask    thank god the days of cleaning bottles are over  

Speeder how has DD1 taken to the new baby? 

I'm not really bothered if people find out. We're very open about the fact we used donor and I know there is a chance someone with blab to Noah first but there adults so hopefully not. One day we'll explain to my nieces too


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## Spaykay

I don't think I could cope with bottles...however exhaisuting bfing is!!! Gets lonely too.

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Yeah bottles sound even more confusing than weaning  BFing suits me fine, most of the time I don't even get out of bed  


Mini - hope you got back to sleep


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju I did do your way ju but he stopped feeding with his reflux. I gave him warm milk and he drank it so carried on with warm milk. 

There was only a couple of cases of bacteria found in the powder in another country which is why they want us to scold the powder.


----------



## amandaloo

Mistletoe - Noah was 6 mths yesterday thought Charlie was older ?? Well now I'm confusing myself as he's 24 weeks so thought that was 6 mth as was counting in 4 weeks I suppose they average a yr out to make it 52 weeks for a yr !  Oh well duhhh I've been a bit in front for mths !!! . Just ignore my comment I've been a bit thick !


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## carrie lou

Happy 6 months Charley!   


Amanda - if there are 52 weeks in a year then 6 months would be 26 weeks?  I guess it's confusing because most months are longer than 4 weeks


----------



## amandaloo

Yeah your right Carrie I've just got confused !   can't believe ive been that thick lol !


----------



## juju81

Yeah sterilising bottles was a faff but it was balanced out by the fact nick could do them and help feed!!!


----------



## carrie lou

That's true Ju. But now that we've started weaning, he's only having 3 or 4 milk feeds a day so it's not such hard work anymore.


----------



## juju81

Things are soooooooooo much easier once weaned


----------



## carrie lou

Yeah, actually things started getting easier around 3 months when he suddenly decided he didn't need 2-hourly feeds anymore  Now if only he could sleep a little better...


----------



## Spaykay

DH got impatient the once we tried a bottle with expressed milk. He wanted to do it..me tge sucker prepared it and he couldm't understand why it took so long! I fear tgat if we did bottles it would still be all me or DS would be over fed at every cry. At leadt I could go out and leave DH to cope and realise how hard it is!!!

Kay xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I have to say formula feeding or breast feeding alone is easier than combination feeding. With what I ended up doing I had to sterilise bottles, make and cool milk and keep and eye on the clock for expiry of milk, breast feed and find time to express making sure I had sterile expressing equipment. It was a lot to manage. Never mind it is done now and we got through.

I kept a promise I made to give Charley ''some'' breast milk in his diet until 6 months. I stopped expressing last Monday night when Dad became ill. I just could not do it all with the terrible stress. Charley has still had a couple of breast feeds a day all week and I will keep doing that as long as he wants to and I still have some milk. He has been fed on mostly formula all along, so it is really a bonus and for loving comfort for the two of us rather than nutrition. He gets really happy when I am preparing to breast feed him and once latched calms right down and really relaxes into the cuddle. It is really close and comforting. Now he is weaning too in amongst all this chaos surrounding Dad being in hospital and having to rehouse him in sheltered accommodation and a diagnosis of mild dementia. Poor Charley's routine is in tatters. He has tried baby rice, carrot, butternut squash and pear so far in the last week and it has all gone in happily.


----------



## Spaykay

Mistletoe ((())) love to ur dad. So sad to watch them change  glad LO doing so well.
Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Holly you've done well to keep BFing this long after what happened when Charley was born, Combi feeding does sound like an awful lot of hassle  I too love the closeness and cuddles of BFing, now that it's only a few times a day it feels more "special" than when he was latched on all the time  and I hope to keep going as long as he still wants it. Glad weaning is going well, and lots of love to your dad


----------



## speeder

Holly - you have a lot on your plate   your breast feeding sessions sound lovely. I hope you get your dad settled - how difficult


----------



## amandaloo

Holly- sorry to hear about your father . You've done brilliantly feeding as you have been doing x

To everybody on here going to be taking a break from posting for a little while as it's coming up to Christmas . Really want this to be the most special Christmas we've ever had . Hopefully see you all in the new year . Have a wonderful Christmas whatever you may be doing . Merry Christmas and happy new year to
You all 

Amanda x


----------



## pheobs1

Holly sorry to hear about your dad xx


----------



## hakunamatata

holly    

well ladies obv with the gestational diabetes they wanted to scan me to make sure iccle one isnt too big   . well it actually turns out she has a small tummy, on the lower percentile. they even discussed giving me steroids incase of an early delivery, but they said this will affect my sugars so have delayed this until after i am scanned again on the 28th. they put me on a trace machine for 50 mins just to check all was ok. it was a long 5 and a half hour stint at the hospital. just want my little girl to be ok. i have lost 3 pounds in the last 2 weeks due to the control of diet/levels and i had leucocytes and ketones in my urine so they have sent it off. has anyone any experience of any of this they can share. she is giving me a good kick now after her second breakfast, which is magical. the consultant even mentioned delievering at 34 weeks, but said he was just plucking a date. i said can you plck another date please lol. just want her to be ok.

sorry to be very me girls. i have been reading and taking in everything, but harder to contribute whilst she's on the inside. which is where i would like her to stay for a bit longer xx

love and a very merry christmas to all. i can imagine all the baby/toddler christmas being blissful but very busy too xx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Leucocytes in the urine indicate a urine infection, which is important to check out and have treated as it can bring on labour or get worse quickly in pregnancy. If you have fever, chills or pain in the loins, or blood in the urine see the doctor urgently or go to hospital.

Ketones indicates starvation - means you are using fat as fuel because the sugar is not available. This could be partly due to increased needs in pregnancy and the fact that you have been on a restrictive diet.

If you have lost weight this would be in keeping with the ketones as you have used up some fat for energy.

Make sure you also stay hydrated.


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## carrie lou

Hakuna I'm sure they would only deliver early if she would be safer out than in, so hopefully she will stay safely in there for a good while longer hun     take care of yourself. 


AFM - Zac will be 7 months on Boxing Day  and he is so nearly crawling! He never used to enjoy being on his tummy but now every time I put him down he rolls over straight away and tries to wriggle forward like a little caterpillar, so funny. My mum said this is the last Christmas we will be able to put the presents under the tree before Christmas day, because next year we will have a little person getting into everything and trying to unwrap them


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## Fizzypop

Hak - didn't want to read and run but v quick reply as off out to deliver pressies! 

I had ketones in my urine the week after I gave up work basically because I was eating less so if you've adjusted diet cos of diabetes sounds like that would be the reason. The midwife I had made a really big deal of this but then was told by consultant nothing to worry about! 

In terms of stomach for bubba did they say why she might have a small stomach? It is so so difficult because we want them here safe but when I had my growth scan she had big tummy and was weighing 7.5 pounds, nearly 5 weeks later she was born at 6lb 14, from my experience there is quite a bit of inaccuracy on those scans, in my case it was because I got fat and there was quite a bit of fat on my tummy for scanner to get thru 

In our experience, the doctors and consultants always erred on the side of caution (DH said to them that they always try to find problems and prevent them in advance, so the way I approached it was to ask why something was happening, why they want to approach in a particular way, what the options are,  what the potential outcome was if we took each option etc.

PM me if you need to chat xxx


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## abcdefgh

Hi everyone  

I got my BFP just over a week ago after DIUI (7th attempt  ). It might be a bit early to be joining this thread but I have a pregnancy related question so thought it might be best to ask here. 

Just wondering what happens at the first midwife appointment and when you should have it. I saw my GP the other day and she said that first appointment and scan would be on same date between 10 and 12 weeks and I'd get a letter with the appointment. However, today the surgery sent me an appointment request form with a booking reference so you can go online and book it yourself. When I phoned the GP to find out when I should book it for (as no info came with the letter), the secretary said as soon as possible and that this was just for an initial appointment, not the scan. So, I've booked it for when I'll be 7+2 on the 6th Jan because I'll still be off work then and it seemed easier but now I'm worried that's too soon. I won't even have had my 7 week scan yet (booked for later the same day). Should I change it?

Sorry for the long post! And sorry not to have caught up with what else is gong on on here yet - I will try to do that soon. xxx


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## juju81

Hakuna lovey u must be scared but like carrie said they will only deliver if she's safer out and obviously if she's safer out than obviously that's what ur'd prefer,, if that makes sense!  

Abc, congrats hun. Just leave it as it is. It doesn't matter really, I wa 10 wks but that's only our midwives policy!

Carrie, Z might surprise u next year. Noah's hardly been interested in the tree or presents


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hak  

Abc I had my 6 wk scan then booked with midwife. I had first appt at 8 wks but only cos I know her. It's normally about 10 wks. Congrats  

Carrie Ds hasn't bothered with presents or the tree so you'll be ok. You need to move your ornaments and get a stair gate tho!!


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## carrie lou

Abc welcome to the thread  It seems to vary across the country when you have your MW booking appointment, in our neck of the woods though they like to do it as early as possible (I was only 6 weeks when I had mine) so as to get you in for the 12 week scan in plenty of time because this has to be done within a certain window and they don't want you to miss out. So at your booking appointment, I'm trying to remember what mine involved ... I think it was lots of questions about my and DH's medical history (obviously for us ladies DH's history is not relevant  ), then blood tests and urine test (go with a fullish bladder  ). Also she gave me lots of info to take home and read, told me who to ring if I had any worries, etc. Your 12 week scan has to be done between (I think) 11 weeks and 13+6, so I imagine that will be booked after your MW appointment. I would leave it as it is. Hope this helps  


Mini - yes baby-proofing is top of my to do list for the new year


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Just strip your house bare, that will be easier!


----------



## carrie lou

I don't know where to start! I keep looking around and seeing "baby hazards" and thinking oooh that'll have to go  Might just baby proof one room, put a baby gate on the door and he'll just have to play in there


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## abcdefgh

Thanks girls  . I think I'll just leave it then. If the timing had been that important I'm sure they would have said. Eek - can't believe all this is happening! I feel like a complete fraud  .

Hope you all have a great time over Christmas with your babies and toddlers, or even just bumps!

xxx


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## abcdefgh

By the way, did you tell midwifes about the donor? Or can you just get away with saying no known problems when they ask about DH's history? I don't really mind telling them but, on the other hand, don't really want to be thought of as different from anybody else at this point. x


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## carrie lou

Entirely up to you what you tell the MW ... I intended to tell mine the whole truth but bottled out on the day. Got as far as saying I'd had fertility treatment and she was a bit funny about that  so I didn't feel I wanted to tell her any more! In hindsight I should have just told her everything and not cared what she said or thought!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Everyone knew about my donor treatment and no one bat an eyelid - it is more common than you think and they have seen it all before. It is relevant for screening tests and all sorts of things to do with family history.

I had my booking appointment about 9-10 weeks I think and scan at 13 weeks approx.

Ohh and I had a 34 week growth scan that said all measurements above 95th centile and I was to have a 9lber. In the end he was on 50th centile and was 7lbs14oz


----------



## speeder

our tree is destroyed - all the baubles are now above toddler height so it looks like one of those city centre trees where only the top half is decorated to deter thiefs! 

abcd - I didn't tell the midwives as it's none of their business  . the only thing it can affect is your due date as they give you that according to size at twelve week scan whereas you will know your exact date from your clinic.  . dates can be important should you need to be induced  

hak. - did they say why they want to deliver early honey? sorry if I am being thick! whatever happens it won't be long till your precious one is in your arms


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks everybody. I think the GP has already said it was an assisted conception in her referral letter but said it was up to us whether we tell the midwife about the donor. I don't really have any major issues with telling but, like Speeder said, I kind of feel it's none of their business and would just prefer to feel as normal as possible at this point, having felt anything but normal for such a long time! xx


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## juju81

I told my midwife, don't know why really, but she didn't give two hoots! Jut meant w skipped loads of the partners questions!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

ABC - i didn't tell the MW either. she doesn't need to know. I just said no known problems. they knew about the IVF and was put under a consultant    

If it was an egg donor then they would need to know to get the nuchal risk factor stats right. 

with this pg, cos its DHs, i have had to tell them about DS because i had to flag up the chromosomal problem with DH and why i needed to see the consultant ASAP. Funny how things work out. 

Speeder


----------



## juju81

Bit of a mixture of answers there!! Its up to u really. Some of us told some didnt.  Neither makes much difference to be honest cos try don't read ur flaming note anyway


----------



## abcdefgh

Cheers everyone  . Will maybe just see how it goes at the appointment. x


----------



## Fizzypop

Ju - you sum up perfectly! Had so many probs with them not reading notes and I got really angry at one midwife appt.

Abc - massive congrats. On the telling/not, I found myself more open about donor as pg went on. I wasnt planning on telling mw but DH did and once bubba burn and they do tests I told them paternal history unknown, although I reckon they wouldn't let people be donors if they had dodgy history! Only thing that annoyed me was they wrote donor sperm on my nuchal test thing and clearly it makes no difference!

We have got a cordon round our Xmas tree because we already have to think about dog proofing - it is v good practice especially having a Labrador that will put anything and everything in his mouth!!!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I had more questions after Charley's birth what with severe neonatal jaundice, tongue tie and undescended testicle - they kept asking me if we had any history of these in the family. Of course I have no idea if the donor does as these aren't part of the questions they screen for and I can't ask him.


----------



## speeder

abcd - I was like you - I just wanted to feel normal after months of feeling otherwise! I just answered the health screening questions based on what we knew about donor - which was unremarkable. 

dh and I always agreed we would tell whenever it impacted our child's health, which with dd1 was horribly soon as like Hazel we had problems after birth and the paediatricians always ask about family history. they of course didn't bat an eyelid! 

on more mundane matters - I think I have an oversupply of milk, which sounds great in theory but is actually rubbish. making dd2 quite windy and spurts in her face - in one feed she only can manage one boob leaving the other really sore! anyone got any tips? 

happy Christmas eve to everyone - especially to all those babies having their first xmas!!

xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Kellymom has all the answers

Here is the page on your problem

http://kellymom.com/bf/supply/fast-letdown.html

/links


----------



## hakunamatata

thanks for all your comments girlies, hopefully it will be a different story at next weeks scan , until then im going to enjoy chrimble and try not to worry xx i didnt understand what the problem was with a small tum, thought it would be preferable, but can indicate failing to thrive, tho the flow through the cord is good. ah well will keep you posted but thanks so much for listening and taking the time to comment at this busy time, you girls are great xxxxxxxxxxxx

abc i was very under whelmed by first midwife appointment, just form filling. the best one was the next at 16 weeks when we heard the heartbeat. enjoy honey, you waited and longed for it, congrats and welcome to our happy home x


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## Fizzypop

Hak - also meant to say that altho stomach small, they have said she is on the centile charts, which means there are fewer babes with a stomach that size but it is not unheard of. If she was off charts that would be a different thing. 

Bit like DD and her weight - HV are not happy that she is now finally following 0.4th centile (which is bottom) but I kep saying to them that she is following a curve and that is fine. 

What wad weight of baby?


----------



## hakunamatata

she is 2 pounds 15. its just at the 21 week scan she was smack on middle so has declined, maybe thats the issue xx


----------



## carrie lou

Hak - as Holly found out, the scan measurements can be wildly inaccurate! On the plus side, it's good they are keeping such a close eye on you so if there is a problem they will act quickly. Best of luck for your next scan and in the meantime have a lovely Christmas - your last before you become a family of 3!    


Speeder - the only thing I can think of is to express off a bit of milk before each feed - I've heard this can also make it easier for bubs to latch on. Hope it works out for you.  


Abcd - on the telling or not telling issue, all they really need to know is whether there are any health problems on the donor's side and it seems most donors are selected to be very healthy - so if you don't want to tell, I'm sure there will be no problem. At my 12 week scan though they asked me "exactly what kind of fertility treatment" I'd had so I told them - I think this was to find out if I'd used donor eggs which would affect the risk calculation. 


At Zac's 6 week check, I mentioned that he seemed to have an intermittent squint and the GP asked me if there was any history of squint in the family - funnily enough DH had one as a child! Strange how things turn out. Anyway Zac's squint seems to have corrected itself now which the doc says is quite common.


Well ladies I hope you all have a fantastic Christmas and lots of good things to come in 2012.  We are having my family over for Christmas dinner tomorrow, my mum will help me with the cooking. Last Christmas I did everything myself with a 20 week bump!


----------



## sweetdreams73

Haku - sweetie try not to worry    , I know thats hard as I worried the whole way through my pregnancy with the boys... 2lb 15ozs is good weight hun at your gestation for your beautiful girlie... not completely off the charts like my boys were...  Daniel was delivered at 2lb 13ozs at 33 weeks and now look at him...big chunky monkey!! If they were really worried they would have booked you in for c-section like me the next day......also if the blood flow to the placenta is all normal then thats great too... try and remember scans are only estimates of your babies weight anyway and they can get them wrong... they got mine wrong..the boys were actually bigger than they estimated when born...the charts are just a guide thats all.... enjoy a wonderful xmas with bump and DH and this time next year you will be dressing your girl up in xmas outfits  ..    thats all good at next scan xxx   

abcdef - we didnt tell Consultants and MW's about using a donor unless they asked about DH's medical history... it was only when the boys were delivered by emergency c-section on their birthday and Matthew stopped breathing 5 mins after he was born   the pedetricians and neonatal drs asked about DH's medical history and mine and we had to tell them we had used a donor and that there was no known heart problems on the donor side... the use of a donor never came up before that!

would like to wish everyone a most wonderful xmas and a fantastic new year     and wishing that 2012 brings everyone much joy and happiness with their bumps and babes... I am hoping that in 2012 I might have a little more "me" time (who am I kidding having two boys crawling and walking   ) and be able to post and chat to you lovely ladies a lot more.

lots of love sweetdreams matthew and daniel and DH    xxxxxx


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## hakunamatata

thanks sd honey your boys are evidence of what can be achieved xx enjoy your busy christmas


----------



## chrispx

Merry Christmas everyone, have a lovely day.

Our first Christmas as parents has been magical, had a great morning.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

DS refused to eat his xmas dinner    but he stayed at nana and popps house xmas day night all on his own      it wasn't planned either! But my nice lie in became a morning in bed cos i was ill


----------



## Spaykay

Hope everyone enjoyed Christmas. We now have New Year with friends and the 3 kings (epipjany celebration in Spain) with my parents to look forward to. 

Kay xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

hakuna hun         i am so sorry you have been worried - hope she has picked up again on your next scan and you were able to enjoy xmas

am so pleased everyone had a good and mad christmas with bumps and babies - we had a lovely time as well at the beach in 30 degrees!! xmas lunch was a bbq on the beach and it was gorgeous then had the dinner at night when it was cooler. joshi also had no idea but loved playing with his wrapping paper!!!

llots of love to all
Ceci


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

What is it with wrapping paper? Charley must have sucked, patted, shredded, scrunched more on the wrapping paper than the presents. I hope it isn't toxic!

The bag that the little plastic squirty farm yard are zipped into is just as fascinating as the animals. The boxes are just as fascinating as the toys.

I guess they don't know the difference - everything is completely new and to be explored. I almost forget that they have never seen, tasted, heard, smelt or touched any of these things before. It is very exciting.

Charley's first ever meat was from the Christmas Turkey and his first taste of green vegetables was a sprout. He had carrot, parsnip, a tiny dot of potato and a few little tiny bits of turkey for his Christmas feast. Even tasted a tiny dot of icecream that had been on my Christmas pudding - naughty I know!


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## hakunamatata

thanks ceci hun. we didnt have a full growth scan yest as apparently they only do that at fortnightly intervals but they checked the fluid around little one and also the flow through the cord determining functioning of placenta and they were happy with that, so so am i. find out more next week. my metformin has been increased as things have worsened but we are getting there. we have our little girl xx

love hearing about everyones christmas, that will be us next year. had a great day with my great niece and nephew today and it brings it all home we will soon have our family xx big hugs to all


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## speeder

Hi Hak - that is good though that all looks well with the fluid and placenta - very reassuring.  not long to go x

Ceci - extremely jealous of your beach talk.  It's been so windy here that I've been unable to venture out the house some days as our roof tiles are all pinging off   

We had a lovely Xmas this year - DD really excited about the whole Santa thing.  Daddy decided to dress up as Santa and come to the back door with DD's presents.  She was gobsmacked and the look on her face was one of amazement (and she didn't guess it was Daddy, even though the Santa outfit was a bit skin tight!)  

It's all been a bit of a haze to me - feeling a bit better now, two weeks on but I had forgotten how tough the sleepness nights are!  I do them all and DH looks after DD1 in the daytime so I'm like the Xmas zombie floating around the house on 3 hours broken sleep a night.....  

What is fab is that so far, DD2's weight gain has been really good - she's already surpassed her birth weight so I'm really hoping it continues to go well (as DD1's weight gain was always a bit pants!)  She still has jaundice though - 15 days on - it's beginning to go but her weight gain is fine and she's alert so they're keeping an eye on it.  Apparently they like new born jaundice to go by 14 days hmmmm.  DD1 had it too for quite a few weeks - apparently there is something in some mum's breast milk that can cause it to linger and it can be genetic.  DD2 looks like she is v tanned.   

I hope everyone has a lovely new year - anyone doing anything exciting?  We're just going to DH's parents and I hope to get some SLEEP!!!!!

Wishing everyone a great 2012 - especially those who are meeting their new little ones in the next few months. 

love speeder xx


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## Spaykay

Speeder - it does get easier. I am now on about 6 hours broken sleep and feel good on it! 2nd time round you know there's a light at the end of the tunnel. My grumy baby is at last starting to giggle, smile and play on his mat!

Kay xxx


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## juju81

Aww speeder, hats off to you doing all the night feeds   I used to go to bed at about 730. Nick would then do the 11 feed and I would then do the 2am feed as nick got up for work. Noah was very poorly with jaundice. We had to stay in hospital 2 extra nights for his liver levels to return to a safe  level. He spent about 36hrs under the billiblanket. It was so hard cos we literally had to keep him in there apart from feeds and change. He hated it to and we weren't allowed to comfort him cos it meant taking him out. Horrendous horrendous time   Glad he's improving 

I was amazed actually, his weight never dropped below his birth weight


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - have they done a bilirubin level or a skin probe measurement and plotted it on the graph to assess risk of the jaundice? You know what happened to Charley so I won't go into it again. He lost 20oz in a week, so if she is gaining weight that is much better than us. Might still benefit from some UV light though. Not much of that about in December!


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## hakunamatata

speeder sounds like youre doing fantastitically. xxx feeling relieved this end. not worrying till next update wed. she was soooooooo active last night it was amazing lol. xx


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## hopingagain

Hi ladies just popping on to wish everyone a very happy new year as i know I will definitely not be seeing this one in as sleep is very precious LOL! I hope all our hopes and dreams for 2012 come true xx


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## teresal

just to wish everyone a happy new year, like most of you i won't see in the new year, i will be sound asleep i hope, meredith is having trouble with teeth again so having disturbed night and boy its a shock when your not used to it now

hugs to all xxx


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## hakunamatata

happy new year everyone im contemplating my bed already xx


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## pheobs1

Wishing you all a very happy new year, I'm still in bed! Xxxxx


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## juju81

Happy new year girls

I'm still in bed too! Noah's at nannys!


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## Fizzypop

Happy new year everyone - what an exciting year coming up as more bubbas being born xxx fingers crossed for another bunch of bfp's too xxx


I went to bed at 1 and managed to get 7 hours sleep which I'm pleased with! Did bring her into bed with me to get until 8 but still happy!


Found out before Xmas that we might only have 1 vial of ds left, and I've asked them to check expiry date so I know when we need to go again and fingers crossed donor is still available so we can buy some more. So that will decide whether we go in 2012 or wait till 2013


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## Spaykay

Fizzy - I put DS in bed with us at 7 am for extra sleep too! Got until 8.30 when DD started calling MUMMY!

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

Happy New Year everyone  Here's to a wonderful 2012 full of lots more bumps and babies  
I'm off to bed now, didn't get to sleep until 2 o'clock this morning which is the latest I've been up since long before Z was born - and he was wide awake at 6.30 ready to start the day


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## pheobs1

Hiya, quick question, I've been showering since ET. Im 14 weeks tomorrow, what are your thoughts on me having a bath today? Obviously not a boiling one, I need to shave my legs and it would be much easier in the bath and I'm too cold to shower!
Would appreciate your thoughts/advice xxxxx


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## hakunamatata

i didnt have one till gone 20 weeks but think i was very fearful. i still get worried now that water is too hot. only you will know what youre comfortable with as theres nothing worse than getting in there and stressing. but in all honesty you should be fine, but a very personal decision. xx yippee for 14 weeks hun thats fabulous x ive done some more creative painting in the nursery today, but man is it exhausting and time consuming. enjoying it tho xx


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## speeder

happy new year everyone   

phoebs - I didn't bath til 20 weeks first time round - not sure why! I had baths all the way through second time round - I just made sure they were not too hot, specially till 12 weeks. I think baths are fine honey xx 

my little baby is just over two weeks now and has adorable chubby cheeks and makes little squeaking noises - it's this that helps me cope with the lack of sleep !

x


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## juju81

At first I thought what a strange question lol! Then I realised u were being serious   it neve crossed my mind but then I only had a shower cubicle! 

I'm sure you would be fine. It's only because of why we went through that makes us even more cautious but as long as u don't come out red raw ur'll be ok lovey xx


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## speeder

ju ju -  

meant to add Holly - yes they have tested baby speeders bilirubin level - a few times - and it's always been just under their threshold for actually doing anything like a bili blanket. thank goodness! I was traumatised after dd1 was in hospital after her birth as there were loads of cock ups with her care - 6 hourly blood tests which turned out to be totally unnecessary - so I think the docs hate me as I question every single blood test they carry out! 

anyway - at 18 days she looks less like a little pumpkin so it's finally fading  

Holly - can I add baby speeder to your list of babies born please? she was 8 pounds five - sorry I can't mention her name..... one day  

hope everyone has had a lovely holiday. look forward to hearing about all the babies due in 2012, soom very soon! xx


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## carrie lou

Pheobs I had baths pretty much all the way through my pregnancy, except for the 2ww, just don't make the water too hot, you should be fine


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## Spaykay

Baths - so long as the bath doesn't feel 'hot' when you get in and your skin doesn't go red you'll be fine. I aired on cautious with temp. Baths are recommended later on for back pain relief so i really don't think they'll hurt bubs so long as they're not too hot. Treat yourself!

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

get in that bath pheobs.   

I bathed from 2ww, it was warm not hot, I was so convinced i wasn';t pg i decided to run a HOT bath    whoops! But it obviosuly did not harm. Then obviosuly with the 2nd i didbt know i was pg so carried on as normal.


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## Spaykay

Gawd...I got totally drunk when 5 weeks pg as had no idea  I probably had a bath too.

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

i wasn't drunk but i was drinking and i had a sneaky ***


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - you will need a bath thermometer for little one, so why not get one now? They are only a couple of pounds to buy. That way you can rest assured that the water is no hotter than body temperature so cannot do any harm.

Speeder - glad baby Speeder has been tested and that things are improving.


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## pheobs1

Good idea, thanks Holly x


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## hakunamatata

Morning girls hope you are all well. wanted to come on and share my good news from yesterday. iccle one is now 4 pounds 1 ounce so has put on over a pound which is fantastic. she is now nearing the middle percentile on tummy size and they dont want to scan her again until the 24th, yippee. the relief was immense, our little girl is progressing.
i had another appointment in the afternoon which i need you breast feeding ladies advice on, but its a bit personal for me, so here goes. i havent disclosed to yourselves before but i have bipolar and have experienced manic episodes over the years and depression too. thing is i want to breast feed. i have been medication free since feb when we did the fet before iui. so i relaise this will be over a year when iccle one arrives. thing is they want me back on meds from day one and the psychiatrist thinks its safe to breastfeed on olanzapine. im not sure. he said the amount in breastmilk is so minimal and can be minimalised further by expresseng milk to feed after i take the pill at say 9 and not feed from me for 5 hours. is this practical. would i be able to produce enough in the day to cover me. opinion all valued and considered. better dash hubby back with ruby in need of coffee and her food. i will be back xx


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## Spaykay

Haku - all u can do is try hun. Where there's a will there's a way! Join a bfing group for support. I got PND with my 1st baby and I imagine that with ur illness hun, without some help, the stress of a new born may exasipate (sp?) depression so I'd follow the advice of professionals. You can always try breast and formula. 

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

Hakuna I would definitely follow the advice of the psychiatrist hun. Looking after a baby is very stressful, I have experienced anxiety since having Z as much as I love being a mummy - the last thing you want is to get depressed while trying to enjoy your new baby. You could consider combination feeding - so express before you take the pill, then for the next 5 hours feed her with expressed milk and formula if needed, then breastfeed for the rest of the day. I think this could work well. But remember your little girl needs a calm happy mummy more than she needs breastmilk, so if you have to top up with formula some of the time it's really not the end of the world honey. Great news on the scan.


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## Fizzypop

Hak - since I've been bf'ing and trying to take various medication, the phrase I come across a lot is 'take if the benefits outweigh the risks' - but who knows what that means!!!


If the dr says its okay, then it must be, although I don't see how expressing makes a difference - can he explain that? You could always bottle feed for the 5 hour period and breasteed at other times? But if bf'ing doesn't work out for you then don't worry - the one thing I wish I'd been told is that bf'ing is not just a case of latching baby on and off you go - in my case baby had major trouble latching on which was not spotted early enough and now I don't produce enough milk to satisfy her and every feed has a formula top up. Or maybe breastfeed for a shorter period if that's what you want to do. 


The other thing is, not that I know much about the condition (or expect you to tell us anything), that I would wonder is can the condition be managed in other ways - counselling etc, extra support from midwives/health visitors, lower dose of meds, and is the dr taking into account that you have been off meds for this long and whether you have been symptom free. I've found it helps a lot to build a good support network (which dh describes as coffee mornings and chat, lol!), and also to go for a little walk each day to make sure I got out the house (the dog was always happy with that as ruby will be I'm sure!)


One of my friends has a history of depression and she did not get pn depression at all.


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## *ALF*

Hakuna - a flying post for now to say I have some experience with mental health medication and pregnancy/breastfeeding so I'll try and get back on this evening and give a longer answer. My gut is to listen to the psychiatrist. Great news on the scan. Will be back this evening with my tale.


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## speeder

Hak great about the scan - your little girl is doing fab  

I am sorry I don't know about meds and breast feeding but I think I would take the advice of your psychiatrist honey. having a baby is the most wonderful thing - but it's exhausting and anxiety inducing and such a change that you will want everything on an even keel. I dont have a history of depression any wept this morning at how tired I feel - to the extent I wished I couldnt breastfeed so well as formula fed babies sometimes sleep better! 

in terms of expressing - it would be a faff but definitely doable - I used to do that before a nite out. you would be very full though so in the five hours you didn't feed would probably want to express and chuck away some milk - also to keep your supply up. also why don't you contact la leche league about it? this must be a really common question. 

whatever happens honey your baby will be well fed and happy and I wouldn't feel guilty - formula is amazing these days and the formula fed babies I know are just as healthy and happy. 

love speeder xx


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## speeder

ps on this subject - does anyone know if formula babies do sleep better? I am seriously struggling on the sleep front and am a rubbish mummy to my toddler - feel really unwell actually - if I gave formula at the 11 pm feed would dd sleep longer? thing is I am so full at 11 pm I would have to express anyway - what a faff so it might be counter productive. 

any advice welcome! 

could have killed dh this morning - who is in the spare room and sleeping 8 hours a nite - who said he reckoned he was just as tired as me! ARGH men!!!!!!!


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## Spaykay

Speeder - formula fed don't necessarily sleep better. Both mine are/were breast fed. DD went 11 hours at 8 weeks and DS can wake anything from 2 to 6 times a night. I sleep in DS's room and although knackered...I'm starting to get used to it! Ur baby is pretty newborn yes? Their sleep patten WILL improve soon and your body WILL start getting used to it. I often think that if I bottle fed then at least I could dump it on DH to cope with and see what real lack of sleep feels like. It won't be forever and your toddler won't remember this! It's hard isn't it! ((()))

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

Speeder - formula doesn't always equal better sleep... a girl in my BFing group was so tired as a result of her daughter waking 10 times a night that she tried a bottle of formula at bedtime, daughter STILL woke up 10 times that night! I suppose you could try it just once and see if there's any improvement. Hope it gets better soon, must be exhausting when you have a toddler to look after as well.


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## speeder

thanks Kay. you are up 6 times a nite?!?! you are amazing!  

dd1 slept through the nite I.e. 11pm till 6 am from 7 months. dd2 last nite was feeding at 230am, 5am and then 7am - which is fab at 3 weeks . but sometimes the whole feed-poo-feed cycle takes an hour! 

will I start to get used to it?! I hope so!!I feel v run down! 

our Dhs wouldn't cope methinks.....  I just feel guilty that I can't face a toddler in the day too - she must wonder where her nice mummy has gone! 

xx


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## northernmonkey

just popping in for my quarterly post    I do lots of lurking but if I'm not tied up with one child it's the other so doesn't leave much time to actually write anything.  anyway happy new year to you all.
Speeder - congratulations on your new arrival, I just wanted to say do get yourself checked out if you are feeling unwell.  I was totally wiped out after having dd#2 despite a short, easy labour and a hubby who did absolutely everything around the house afterwards.  Everytime the midwife or HV called I mentioned how tired I was and they all just told me it was normal to feel like that having two children.  After 10 days I felt so rough that I would have to sit down even after walking up the stairs and eventually phoned a post natal helpline at my designated hospital.  To cut a long story short I ended up at the GP in tears who took my temp, saw that it was raised and told me I had been suffering from an infection.  I was given antibiotics and 24 hours after starting them felt a million times better.  As for the guilt, that seems to be a normal part of having a second baby - you're so used to being able to give the older child your full attention and not only can you no longer do that but you're also exhausted and irritable.  It does get easier, honestly.   
Hakuna - I'm sure Mistletoe will be able to advise you re the drugs and breastfeeding as she's a pharmacist, but I totally agree with Carrie Lou in that your baby needs a happy mummy above anything else.  I'm not sure how long you can express for indefinitely - anyone else out there know??  So pleased to hear that your latest scan was ok, you must have been so relieved.  
Pheobs - not sure whether I've congratulated you yet - congratulations!!  Well done you!
Hi to everyone else, I'm just waiting for my parents to arrive so better go and get the kettle on cos they won't think to make one for me instead.   
NM
x
ps we're starting tx in the next couple of weeks for # 3.  I must be crazy - just starting to get some semblance of a life back and am hopefully going to do it all over again.....


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

NM are you MAD      

Hak - Like the others have said i would listen to your con. Like Carrie i had anxiety and didn't anything about it until it got out of hand and i was virtually getting no sleep. It sent me loopy. I would never again leave it so long. I didn't BF but if i did and it was a choice to do conbined feeding or no meds, i would defo choose the meds. You've done well being off the meds for a year but having a baby is such hard work, i'd hate for you to have it ruined by stressing about BFing and your meds. I have heard it is minimul too. Not alot gets through breast millk and like the con said, express first then give a bottle then breast feed. Your midwife/HV should be able to advise you on this. 

I got into a tiz when i was going to BF and looked at feeding and expressing etc and felt a bit    with it all. 

Speeder - why don't you try a bottle at 11pm and see how it goes? no harm done.    is your iron levels ok?


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## abcdefgh

Hi everyone and happy new year! 

Hakuna - Glad your little girl is doing well - great news! Sorry I can't offer any advice on the breastfeeding / medication but it looks like the others have been very helpful. I'm sure everything will work out ok for you and the little one. xx

Speeder - Poor you. Hope you feel better soon  .

AFM - I'm over 7 weeks and had been having a few symptoms so was feeling quite optimistic but then - sorry, TMI - had a bit of brown blood last night / this morning when I wiped. It's not very much and I know this can be quite normal but I cant help panicking slightly as last time before I m/c I started off with brown blood  . I have my scan tomorrow so I'm just desperately hoping that I make it through to tomorrow without any more bleeding and that we see a heartbeat - but I'm pretty worried  .


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## amandaloo

Hakuna- I expressed milk as found it hard to get him latched on and never found that he was having enough milk when I breastfed as he came off still hungry, I think I read somewhere To maintain your milk supply you have to express up to around 8 times a day. Its quite hard to fit it all in. I think I mananged around 6-7 times a day for around 15 20mins a time thats how long it took me to empty sometimes quicker than that though it depended. Its not an easy task trying to fit it in as others who have done the same will tell you. On average I fed him 80 percent breastmilk 20 per cent formula as I couldnt keep up with his demands. It depends on how much your baby feeds etc and how much he has at each feed I suppose. If I did express more I suppose I may have been able to keep up with him but I personally found it too hard to do it. You have to express during the night too I think around 2-3 in the morning when your prolactin levels are at their highest could be wrong with that time though so dont quote me on that!! Ps I had an electric double breast pump too think that helped speed up the process. The other part to your question I wanted to help you with is that I have come across many pg ladies in my job with Bipolar Disorder, and feel that if the consultant is advising you to go back onto your medication once you have had your little one then that is very good advice. There is an increased risk of relapse in pg and after giving birth which Im sure your consultant has spoke to you about and this will be one of the main reasons that he/she has given you this advice. Its better that you make sure you are ok first and foremost so you enjoy motherhood and not miss a precious moment   . Im not quite up on the latest research about breastfeeding and Olanzapine tut tut   if I was in work I would have asked the consultants for you, will try and find out. 

Speeder- Might be worth going to see your GP if your feeling poorly. I combination fed and found formula helped him sleep a tad bit longer so started to feed formula as last feed. All babies different though. Hope you feel better soon   

NM- No 3 lol wow  

Happy new year everyone hope you all had a good xmas and new year x


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

ABC - hope all well.

Speeder - your milk regulation and little one's sleep should improve around week 6. It is possible to combo feed. I've been doing it for 6.5 months. But in order to get a satisfying supply maintained you need to go with the flow for now I would say, then you can gradually replace one or two feeds with formula to give yourself a break and time with your toddler. Someone else can help do some of the feeds. I am only breast feeding once a day now in the mornings from each side and I still have milk. At the beginning I was putting to each breast for as long as he would feed and then topping up with formula every 3 hours.

Breast feeding initially can be continuous cycles from what some of the other girls experienced. That must be hard with another child too.

Hakuna - I will have to look into this more for you if you want me to. Unfortunately, being on maternity leave it is harder for me to get the information as I need specialist texts that are only at work. I can point you in the direction of your local hospital medicines information department based in the pharmacy - you can ring them yourself and get them to do a full enquiry on the subject. They can get the latest specialist information and advice for you from the specialist centre.
It is more complicated than just looking at the drug as you also have to consider any active metabolites and the half life of the drug, then the concentration in the milk and the likely effect on the infant.

This is what the official license for the medicine says 
''_Breast feeding_In a study in breast-feeding, healthy women, olanzapine was excreted in breast milk. Mean infant exposure (mg/kg) at steady state was estimated to be 1.8% of the maternal olanzapine dose (mg/kg).
Patients should be advised not to breast feed an infant if they are taking olanzapine''

But with manipulation of timings you can reduce exposure to the infant by avoiding the peak levels. I would get a medicines information enquiry officially done if it were me. Benefit and risk come into it and there are risks and benefits to both options. The company will protect themselves.


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## carrie lou

NM - no 3!!!   Best of luck to you, that's wonderful  

Abcde - I had a lot of brown spotting around 5-6 weeks, I know you can't help but fear the worst  but look at me now, I have a cheeky monkey sat on my lap as I type  Spotting can be very normal and not necessarily bad news. Fingers crossed for your scan tomorrow, I'm sure it will be fine


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## amandaloo

Abcde- I'm sure I had spotting early on can't just remember when think after 7 weeks but not long after and all was fine just told to rest . Hope your ok xx


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## Fizzypop

Abc - like you say it is perfectly normal, I think I had it at 5/6 weeks too and then a red bleed at 8 weeks. Good luck for your scan. 


Speeder, I think every babe is different, but DD has had formula as last feed since about 2 weeks. I cluster bfeed and then dh gave her a bottle before bed (midnight), then another bf after that and she'd go thru till 7. I'm not pretending it happened like that all the time but def quite frequently. At 4 months she now has bfeed off each side about 8, then 150 ml formula about 10.30, she was going till 7 but we've started having more unsettled nights so I'm squeezing in an extra feed a day. I also think it helps feeding more frequently during the day - I never let her go more than 3 hours between feeds if it's a regular day and when she was little I used to wake her up during the day to feed and I think I fed her something like every 1.5 hours when she was v small. Yes I am a nutter but I was too scared to let her sleep in case missing a feed meant she didn't sleep!


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## abcdefgh

Thanks girls. I'll let you know how it goes. xx


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## *ALF*

Hakuna - right now DD is in bed I'll try and give a slightly longer post. I'd like to tell you my story of pregnancy/breastfeeding and psychiatric drug use, in the hope that some of it may be of use, even though its a different condition and dug.
I have a history of clinical depression.  When we started treatment back in 2004 I had had three episodes of severe clinical depression, the most recent of which had been just over a year previously.  At the time I was on the highest dose of antidepressant, my last bout of depression had occured even whilst taking a maintenance dose of antid's, so I was in the situation a wanting to start fertility treatment so knowing that taking no medication was the safest option weighed up against the knowledge that coming off the medication was more than likely to result in a relapse.  So, I had a decision to make.  I am a firm believer in knowledge is power, so I surfed and surfed and surfed.  As you'd expect, the drug manufacturers recommendation for my antid's was not to use in pregnancy or breastfeeding.  But it was my understanding that this was purely based on that it was known that the drug crossed the placenta and was found in breastmilk and therefore should not be used.  What I wanted to know was the effect on both the developing foetus and the nursing infant of the drug.  So, as I said I surfed and surfed and surfed.  I was looking for the actual research articles that looked at the levels and children and assessed any effects.  For my drug it showed that although it would cross to the baby longterm studies did not show any effects on the child.  I then approached my GP and asked him to refer me to a psychiatist so that I could discuss it with them.  When I did this they confirmed my findings and agreed that given my history staying on the drug whilst pregnant and breastfeeding would be okay.  Taking this all on board I decided that it was in the best interest of both me and any potential child for me not to become depressed again, either during pregnancy of afterwards and so the best thing to do was carry on the medication. So, I was on antidepressants thoughout my pregnancy and since and yes, did attempt breastfeeding whilst taking them. Unfortunatley breastfeeding didn't go well for us, but that was a combination of latching problems and milk flow (or lack of). 
So, my advice would be to do some research yourself and see if you can find studies that have actually looked at lactating mothers and babies and looked at the babies health. I've done a quick search by putting 'olanzapine and breastfeeding' into google and the articles I looked at suggested that although there is not much evidence out there, what there is would suggest the levels passed onto the baby are very small - however, I'd rather you looked at these yourself and drew your own conclusions than taking my word for it.
I'm assuming the expressing suggestion is to express and discard the milk that is likely to contain the highest level of drug.  I would imagine this could be do-able if you are only taking the drug once a day, if you take a morning and evening dose then this may make things more problematic.
As others have said having a happy and healthy mummy is soooo important to your little girl. You need to decide whether that is best achieved by going back on the medication. If so then the next step is to look at the evidence relating to your drug and assess whether you're happy to breastfeed or not.  Your psychiatrist is the expert here and you are not the first woman they have had on this drug wanting to breastfeed, so listen to their advise.
One other thought - are there any other drugs that do the same thing as olanzapine but are known to be safer when breastfeeding. When researching antid's I found that some seemed to be known to be safer in pregnancy/breastfeeding than others - could the same be true for your type of drug? It might be worth exploring?
Ooops seem to have done a bit of an essay there, so I'll stop now but hope something in  there was of some help!!


ABC - hope all goes well tomorrow ++++

Right back to lurking but rarely posting....................
ALF
x


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## speeder

this board is amazing - such lovely support. alf - you have been through a lot and you sound v wise! 

just a quick one to abc - I too have had bleeding at your stage - dd is snoring next to me. will be thinking if you tomorrow honey xxxxx


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## pheobs1

Hak I think Alf has given you some excellent advice, I have very limited experience but would agree that a happy mummy is the best option for your little bundle xxx

Abcdefgh - loads of luck for today. I'm sure all will be well, spotting is very unnerving but really common, will be keeping an eye out for your post xxx

Hope everyone else is doing ok. AFM I am huge, look about 6 months already, don't think I can blame the cyclogest anymore as I've been off it for 2 and a half weeks! Got ou sexing scan booked at our clinic on Jan 25th. I can't wait although I'm really nervous to see that all is still ok with bubs. The last two nights I've had some bubbly feelings low down in my tummy, not sure if it's firsts signs of movement or wind! My mother seems to think it's the baby, so I'm happy to go with that even though it's a bit early, just coz it makes me feel better! DH went out shoppingthe other day and came back with a pile of White vests, babygrows and socks! So amazing to see how excited he is. Lots of love xxxxx


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## speeder

Phoebs - with dd2 I felt movement from 11 weeks - even tho I was told it was impossible I definitely did! enjoy it - wind or not!! 

thanks girls for the suggestions re feeding.... feel a bit ashamed for sounding like a moaner. actually think I am unwell - have had symptoms of a mild tummy bug for over 2 weeks so will go to gp next week if no better. thing is I am a bit of a hypochondriac and hate going to doctors!! 

dd2 actually slept 4 hours straight in the night so I have no excuse  

abcd - good luck - thinking of you  

hak - hope you have got lots of helpful advice here.  

xx


----------



## Fizzypop

Speeder - don't know if you have an NHS walk in centre near you, but if you do could always pop in there at the weekend while dh has kids - you don't need to book an appointment. Ours has been built into the back of sainsburys - really handy!!


----------



## amandaloo

Hakuna- just to add onto my other post as I forgot to mention it. I've know quite a few women take olanzapine when pregnant and their baby's have all been fine. Ive attended a few mother and baby units in my time whereby the consultant in charge always recommemded olanzapine in pg well she did with the ladies I took there xx


----------



## amandaloo

Speeder- ring drs today you should do xx


----------



## *ALF*

Phoebe - I felt DD from 13+6 

Speeder - I'm with the others, try and get to docs


----------



## speeder

Amanda - your job sounds v interesting! 

anyway wish we has nhs walk in centres up here but no such luck! have managed to get doc appointment for this avo x


----------



## pheobs1

Glad you've got an appointment speeder x


----------



## amandaloo

Speeder- lol I'm a community psychiatric nurse . Good glad u got an appt x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I work in mental health and learning disabilty too    

Speeder get yourself to the docs   

Pheobs - I felt DS#2 at 11 weeks too. Bubbling is baby!   

Reading Alfs srory made me think about asking my Baby consultant if i can go back on the anti D either now or after the birth, as i am getting anxious again and really don't want that when baby comes. I get it if DS#1 wakes at night and we have a few bad nights, then i can't sleep after that for a few nights because of the anxiety.    I'll ask next week.


----------



## amandaloo

Mighty mini - that's nice to hear , I'd ask there's no harm in it . I'd more than likely go back on when you've had the little one think you just need to weigh up severity of your symptoms x


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi everyone and thanks for the good luck wishes.

I'm happy to say that the scan was a success! Baby has a strong, steady heartbeat and is measuring 11.5 mm (apparently good). Also no sign of a bleed. We're so happy and relieved (DH even got a bit teary - was very sweet  ). I had a bit more spotting last night and felt like my symptoms had all disappeared so I had completely convinced myself it was all over  . Phew! My 12 week scan is booked for 10th Feb - so another anxious wait begins! 

xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Abcdef- great news x


----------



## carrie lou

Abc that's great news hun


----------



## hopingagain

Just posted on other thread but really really pleased for you abcd xxx


----------



## speeder

abcd - yay yay yay delighted to hear it!!!   it's all one long wait isn't it - but your 12 week scan will be here in a flash! 

everyone has such interesting jobs compared to mine - rewarding too. my job is soooooo dull which I wont disclose but as boring as it gets! my ideal job would be a dog walker!

anyway doc reckons I am fine - just had two bugs and the antibiotics I took for the tear have temporarily nackered my tum. ho hum. am now sitting in costas guzzling cake to treat myself. 

anyway abcdc- hope you have a nice time celebrating tonight xx


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks everyone  

Speeder - Glad it's nothing serious. Hope that cake helps you feel better soon! x


----------



## *ALF*

Abcd - excellent news so pleased for you ++++

Speeder - glad all is okay, let's hope you pick soon. I find cake is usually  helps all situations!!!!


----------



## pheobs1

Fabulous news abcdefgh xx

Glad all is ok speeder, enjoy the cake xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

ABC - Just posted on the other thread - but congratulations are in order again!    

Phoebs - I felt Charley at 15 weeks for certain. Might have been a bit before too, but I was not certain then.
Felt like someone twanging an elastic band very gently in my tummy or tiny fish hitting the side of the tank at first.

Speeder - some live yogurt will help your tum. If not then you need a stool sample sent off check for a bug that can cause more severe antibiotic related diarrhoea. In the mean time keep hydrated and eat lots of cake (that is not medical advice that last bit!    )


----------



## speeder

thanks Holly! cake is not a problem! have to say I have never heard of a tum being upset after antibiotics, only during, is it very common? thing is I had iv antibiotics during labour for group b strep then coamoxclav when I got home - maybe it was too much !


----------



## pheobs1

Can I ask my advisors a quick question please..... Can I eat hummus while I'm pregnant? Tried googling but it's a minefield xxx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder Yes it is very common as the balance of bacteria in the gut is upset. The biggest worry is contracting _clostridium difficile._ This is a toxin producing bug that is normally kept in check by friendly bacteria. If it is allowed to run riot it can cause diarrhoea and at worst an inflammation of the bowel that requires hospital treatment.

Phoebs - here is an NHS link to a healthy diet in pregnancy which about half way down suggests hummus and vegetables and bread sticks as a healthy snack to have.

http://www.nhs.uk/Planners/pregnancycareplanner/Pages/Eating.aspx

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


----------



## speeder

hey phoebes - officially you can eat it - I think! but some women avoid it as there was a case of listeria from it a few years back. I have to say I have eaten it freely in both pregnancies as I feel there are greater risks from listeria than hummus! x


----------



## speeder

thanks Holly - you are a mine of information! just as well I didn't know that over new year as I was quite unwell!!


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks! X


----------



## juju81

Huge congrats abc - I'm off to update cupcake!

Phoebs, I felt Noah at 13+3 the day of my nuchal scan. Its popping. Defo sounds baby. I'm guessing a pink bump for u xx


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks ladies! Ju I thought pink too, but all the old wives tales on line point to boy Well not long until we see if your right!
Pinkcat I ate loads of it tonight! My latest craving is chibatta with dipping oils mmnnnnn xxxx


----------



## juju81

Phoebes get a ticker, I need to see how far gone u are  

Is it a private one? We had one of them, best £90 I've ever spent x


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks Pinkcat, Alf and Mistletoe. xx

Juju - Thanks. How is Cupcake? Hope her pregnancy is going well. Please pass on my best wishes. Love your new photo by the way! xx

Hope everyone is ok and having good weekends. xx


----------



## hakunamatata

wow ladies you truely are all fantastic. thank you so much for taking the time to respond and not judge.    
spaykay a b/f group is defo a good idea. im certainly planning to follow the medical advice, the risks are too high and i have my little girl to consider.
carrie thanks dh and i have discussed combination feeding and agreed we would try this if expressing doesnt keep up. im so lucky to have a hubby happy to do a couple of feeds as he knows the sedative affects of the drugs initially and importance of sleep.
fizzy if i express and dispose of milk it will minimise drugs passing to our baby. unfort as i will of been off meds a year or more being back on meds to minimalise chance of a relapse is the only sensible option. ruby and i will enjoy walks out. i cant wait as i have been unable to do this for a while.
speeder you make a good point about having to express in the night due to being full. i had imagined trying to get a few hours while dh took over lol. looks like i will still have to be awake! ive not heard of la leche league - will google.
northern monkey, thanks hun and good luck with no 3, keep us posted and we're here to support if needed.
mini, thanks hun i will have done well being off a year, ive just tackled one day at a time as 9 months of pg was just too daunting.
amanda thanks for your advice not only as a professional but a mummy.
mistletoe luckily theyre hoping i can be maintained on 5mg as 10 mg is fire fighting levels.
alf thanks to much for your personal story   i really appreciated it. luckily drug is only once a day at night. we're not really wanting to try other drugs as olanzapine has always worked so well. i did want to try other meds pre preg but they didnt want to do that either youve defo been very helpful honey.
mini defo ask your consultant about anti depressants. i think anti dep are more straight forward. i cant take them in isolation due to mania i need mood stabiliser - olanzapine.
abc so pleased scan all went well.
speeder hun hope the cake helped, have some for me xx
sorry for the long post girls but so wanted to acknowledge the advice and time you had all taken.
very tired this am as had nct classes sat was good, dh learnt a lot. im hoping to form some friendships. using stick is very useful, will ring midwife now and see if she can advice anything. prob physio doh, another hospital appointment lol. but all so worth it for my growing baby. need to ring diabetic team too as had 3 unexplained highs. on we plod girls. your support is invaluable.


----------



## speeder

hak -   no one here would ever judge. I just take my hat off to you for being med free in your pregnancy. 

you might find your body copes pretty well with the fullness and regulates itself quickly after a few weeks. I just seem to have over enthusiastic boobs! also you can hand express away any fullness quite quickly - into a bowl by the side of the bed and I chuck it down the sink.....

you could maybe experiment too by seeing if you could take the drug in the morning instead? I have found my babies to be very hungry in the evenings - they seem to cluster feed every hour almost from 5 till 10, when young at least which might be harder. 

I guess you might need to experiment! expressing can take a while to get the hang of - I think medela pumps are meant to be good. 

maybe if I wasn't so greedy with my cake I wouldn't have such leaky boobs  . in a cafe yday with mum and I had forgotten my breast pads and it wasnt pretty!
xx


----------



## hakunamatata

speeder youre fabulous and youve got to remember youre eating cake for me too at the moment and i had quite a fetish pre diabetes lol. enjoy hun but remember those pads lol   

im at the dr at 9.20 re back/hip and midwife says i need swabs for wetness, sorry if tmi. hope all you lovely ladies are well xx


----------



## juju81

Hak, the bf crew have given u some fab advice and u have a lot of options to try. All I will say is try not o stress about it now. U don't know what will happen. It's not the be all and end all, ur little treasure will benefit more from a happy 'chilled' out mummy (and daddy) then a mummy getting hung up with feeding  

I remember the wetness well   

Speeder, it took my milk 2wks to dry up. I was like a tap. I wasn't even feeding


----------



## carrie lou

"bf crew" - I like that   Hak - I quite agree about the chilled out mummy, plenty of people don't BF and they and their babies are perfectly happy and healthy. All you can do is try your best, I'm sure it will work out fine one way or another.  

I was also very leaky for the first 6-8 weeks or so but then things settled down, now I hardly ever leak (but still wear pads to catch drips etc)


----------



## juju81

glad u like!


----------



## ceci.bee

Hakuna hun you have been given lots of fabulous advice - and am in awe of you staying off meds for so long with tx and pg. You and your daughter will work out what is best for you both, and the most important thing is that you are happy and healthy and can look after your baby properly and I know you will manage that   

Carrie - did you buy the bamboo pads? how did you get on with them??

Quick question - I am trying to BF to 12 months to give Joshi antibodies to protect him against nasty african diseases that I have been vaccinated against but J can't be as he is too young. I am mix feeding currently with 2 bf per day at 7am and 7pm and 2 forumla feeds in the day for the nanny to give him while I am at work (could not express enough for day feeds as well with stress of work etc). This has been working perfectly for the last 2 months, but the last 24 hours Joshi has totally refused the breast - going from enthusiastic suckling and draining to howling at the sight of them and pushing them away - we had a real meltdown last night. To say I am gutted is an understatement and feel totally rejected (although I know he doesn't mean it like that). Has anyone been through this?? I am going to try to express to keep my milk going but he would not even drink it out of the bottle this am after I pumped it, but did drink a bottle of forumula........any ideas of how to handle this - should I give up BF or keep trying to offer it to him??

thanks all
lots of love
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Ceci, obviously I have no personal experience of this but one of my best friends did.  She BF her eldest until about 18m but her youngest did exactly what Joshi is doing.  She was about 7/8 months old (sorry cant see how old Joshi is now).  She was devestated and tried to persevere with it but baby just refused.  Maybe try again in a couple of days but if he still wont take it then maybe express.


----------



## juju81

Sorry, just reread your post...I see he turned down EM too.  My friend ended up having to give up unfortunately.  Baby was just getting herself into a right state when she tried feeding.  I did feel for her actually.  Babies unfortnately know their own minds at a very young age.

See if any of 'the crew' have perservered and got it back on track xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci- just a very quick one have you thought he might not be hungry I'm only saying this as Noah only has 2-3 bottle feeds a day now and he's 6 mth old this your DS is older if memory is right . Or I read once that if you are on your af they don't like taste of your breastmilk . Just two quick thoughts . Big hugs hope you are ok xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

was going to say the same. AT around 7 months DS was having just 2 bottles a day. Morning and night. He flatley refused anymore.


----------



## carrie lou

Ceci - I've read it's very unusual for babies to self wean before the age of 12 months, more likely to be a "nursing strike" which I believe is a temporary thing. If I were you I think I would keep expressing to keep up the supply and offer him the breast again in a day or so. Also as the others girls said try cutting back on the formula a bit. Zac has usually 3 milk feeds a day (sometimes 4) and he's younger than Joshi. I would be gutted too but hopefully it's not the end of BFing for you - even if it is, you've done amazingly well  And yes I did get the bamboo breast pads, they are great  and I'm pleased I don't have to buy disposable ones anymore


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

DS definatly self weaned. I tried and tried to feed him but he just didn;t want it. I asked the HV and she said you can't force him. Hes obviosuly getting full up with food. or maybe hes coming down with something?


----------



## juju81

Oooh yeah defo cut out the formula or one of them!  Altho saying that I could understand why he would turn the 7pm one down if hes stuffed but surprised he still doesnt want the boob at 7am.  Have you eaten something thats making it taste funny?  

Carrie, thats why my friend was so surprised her baby self weaned because she was under 1.  I felt sorry for her bless her...they also start becoming defiant...this can be at an early age...Noah did....still is....and its getting  worse


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Charley will now only breast feed in the morning laying down. If he is distressed in the night he will comfort suckle, other than that he completely refuses to breast feed and will arch back and scream.
You can't force them to feed.

Maybe check positioning as this was a tip given to one of the girls at my BF group. As they get bigger they sometimes get uncomfortable. Try a different position like lying down. Watch things like soap and shower gel and what you eat. Try to express a little first as some babies get frustrated waiting for let down compared to formula bottles. Is he poorly with an ear infection or teething?

http://www.lalecheleague.org/faq/strike.html

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/baby/back-to-breast.html#linksstrike

/links


----------



## speeder

that was my only thought - have you changed your diet to alter the taste if your milk? is sounds like a taste issue rather than a boob issue if he refuses expressed milk too! sadly formula is designed to taste quite sweet as it has vanillin in it so for breast milk to compete we have to stay off too much garlic etc


----------



## ceci.bee

Thanks guys so much for all your helpful advice. After a really stressful day at work yesterday worrying about it all, I got home to find Joshi grizzling and putting his fingers in his mouth and drooling everywhere - esp after eating his dinner and it seemed even the spoon was sore in his mouth. I gave him some panadol and an hour later he latched on beautifully and again this morning - Phew!!! am so releived it is teething and not deciding to reject breast after all. 
I took him to be weighed yesterday and he is 10kgs at 9months nearly on the 91st centile and is literally growing in front of my eyes and so far never seems to get full however much he eats, although is not fat in any way. i think I am looking at years of empty fridges and enormous boy appetites - my mates here think he is going to be a rugby player   .....

thanks again and lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Teeth have alot to answer for!


----------



## carrie lou

Glad it worked out for you Ceci   Wow Joshi is a big boy! Zac is too - he was 8.6kg at 6 months (my mum says that's what I weighed on my 1st birthday  ) I'm constantly amazed as I was so teeny as a child and still am petite. And our donor is tall and skinny.


----------



## juju81

Wretched teeth  

Whys that in kgs? My hv only does lbs and oz and I'm to thick to convert it!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

There is a conversion chart in the red book.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I cawirk it out either. I only know lbs and oz!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

So whats that in lbs then  

Ds was 22lb 2 months ago. (16 mths)


----------



## Fizzypop

DD is dinky - 10lb 1 at 4 months - which is about 4.25 kg (my hv gives both and I only remember lbs!)


To get to lbs it's x 2.2, so just over 22 1/2 lbs me thinks


----------



## carrie lou

8.6kg = 18lb 15oz. That was 6 weeks ago  I reckon he's well over 20lbs by now. Going to get him weighed again at the end of this month when he will be 8 months


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Charley was only 15lbs 7oz when I had him weighed almost a month ago. I will see what he weighs tomorrow as we have a hospital appointment and report back. Interesting to see as I have now been giving solids for a month and he is now fitting some of his 6-9 month clothes. I want to see that with the change in diet he is still following between 9th and 25th centile for weight and 50-60th for height.


----------



## speeder

what big boys!? 

dd1 is well over 2 now and only 12 kilos!!! 

glad the feeding is settling Ceci. some babies suffer really badly with teething


----------



## Spaykay

Ooo my post didn't post. DD is 2.5 years and 13 kg. Has been for ages. At 2 months DS was 5.5 kg.

Kay xxx


----------



## *ALF*

All this talk of weights has made me get DD's red book out - she was 10Kg at 9.5months, 12kg at 1.5yrs, 14.75kgs at 2.5 yrs and now at 3.5yrs she's just over 17kgs....... she does have the height to match though!!! she's between the 75th and 91st cntile for both (she has a big head to match too, nightmare trying to find hats to fit!!!!!)


----------



## speeder

my little girls head is teeny - she can still fit baby hats! I really worried about it as her head size dropped from 50th centime to the very bottom of the chart - but she's just got a small head, as do I. I must have a tiny brain which maybe explains a lot....  

article in paper today saying breastfed babies are less content and cry more than bottle fed babies. as if we didn't know that!  you would think mother nature would have made. breast milk that got babies to sleep 8 hours at nite to save our sanity!


----------



## *ALF*

Speeder - It would seem DD gets her proportions from me - I didn't realise I had a big head until I sent in my measurements for my hat thingy when I graduated and turned up to be presented with an extra large!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

arrgghh don't understand this kg business


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

loving Zak's weight carrie!


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks Mini  

Zac has a big head too, has always been on 91st centile. Apparently I was the same. He has always hated having hats on since they put one on him in the delivery room, he screamed the place down  Now I put him in hoodies instead if I want to keep his head warm, it's easier  

Ladies I'm wondering if I should take Z to the doctor... as you know he's never slept well but last night was just ridiculous, his longest stretch of sleep between 10pm and 6am was 1 hour  and I'm a little worried because every time he woke up he seemed quite distressed and couldn't get back to sleep easily which is unlike him. I would hate to think I'm missing something like an ear infection that might be disturbing his sleep? Though he seems well in himself. What do you think?


----------



## Fizzypop

He's not teething is he?


----------



## carrie lou

Possibly - he still has no teeth even though he seems to have been teething for ages. But he's never been like this before.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

If Ds does that I give him Calpol. Probably had it when he didn't need it but teeth are probably the cause.  Might be worth checking it out with doc. I took Ds the other day cos he wouldn't stop crying and his ear was red inside.


----------



## Fizzypop

Carrie - now I think of it DD was a bit unsettled last week and this week she's come out in a cold/cough so maybe there was something brewing. 


She has also start refusing/spitting out calpol from a syringe or spoon so off to boots today to. Uy a medicine dummy. Fingers crossed it works cos I think she's got bit of a temperature :-(


----------



## carrie lou

What's a medicine dummy?  Hope she gets better soon  

Think I'll ring the docs - I know it's probably nothing but I'd never forgive myself if there was something wrong. I'm sure they see lots of hysterical over-reacting mums so they'll understand


----------



## *ALF*

Carrie - my experience is that they can appear to be teething a LONG time before any teeth actually appear. DD started teething at 12wks and then on and off until she cut her first tooth two weeks before her first birthday and then she cut all four front teeth in the space of a fortnight. I was told that when they are born there teeth are alot deeper in their gums so have to move up quite a bit before cutting, some children suffer alot with this others don't seem to notice. DD suffered terribly with all her teeth. There is no harm in giving him some calpol if he seems that unsettled just on the 'just incase' basis, just obviously don't exceed the daily dose maximum. DD got several 'just in case' doses!!! 
How is he with his food and bf? That should give a clue I'd it's teeth or as fizzy said he could just be coming down with a cold.


----------



## carrie lou

He's fine with both BF and solid food, if anything he seems a bit hungrier than usual! If he seems unsettled again tonight I'll give him some calpol. Thanks ALF


----------



## *ALF*

Maybe he's having a growth spurt Carrie that can also unsettle them. I've come to the conclusion that alot of this parenting lark is a bit of a guessing game. If he's okay in himself, eating okay, not got a temp then I doubt it's anything too serious, unfortunately it may be a case of riding it out and not having any clear answer at the end!!! Frustrating but DD has gone through several such episodes!!!!!!!


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie I reckon motherhood is all about instinct - if yours tells you something isn't right with Z then get it checked out - no doc will send you away without giving him a proper check over esp looking in his ears etc. Anyone else at home had a bug recently??
hope it is all nothing and he gets to sleep tonight

good luck1
lots of love
Ceci


----------



## Spaykay

It really is a guessing game isn't it. Hate it when people ask why DS is crying...or TELL me why! I often just don't know!

Kayxxx


----------



## juju81

Try putting medicine mixed with milk. That's how we did noahs


----------



## carrie lou

Well we've been to the Dr this afternoon... he could find nothing wrong with Z except a lazy eye! I was pleased he noticed this because everyone else I've mentioned it to (other docs and HVs) haven't been able to see it. So we've been referred to orthoptist. It's so weird because DH had a lazy eye as a child - if I didn't know better I'd suspect that one of his   had made it after all!  But am sensible enough to know this probably isn't the case   Anyway, glad nothing serious wrong with Z, hopefully just a funny phase.


----------



## juju81

At least he's not poorly. And good they picked his lazy eye up!

If u saw nick and Noah u think would think one of his made it through too! It's scarily uncanny!


----------



## *ALF*

Carrie - glad they picked up on the lazy eye. My earlier post wasn't trying to say you shouldn't take him to the doc (I took DD several times just to get her checked over), just that sometimes there doesn't seem to be an explanantion. Hope he's more settled tonight.

Juju


> If u saw nick and Noah u think would think one of his made it through too! It's scarily uncanny!


 - from the pictures I've seen on ** I would totally agree.


----------



## carrie lou

ALF - I know what you meant hun  you're right, there wasn't really an explanation, I just wanted to be sure.


----------



## Fizzypop

Carrie - glad you have piece of mind now xxx


Well, hv came earlier and she suggested in the milk and I asked what about cooled boiled water and she said fine, so that's how she had her calpol tonight - gulped down her strawberry flavour water, lol. Mummy 1 DD 0


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Saw con today. Placenta still low   going to decide at 36 wks if I need a c section. It's only 2cm lower than they like.


----------



## speeder

carrie - glad all ok! I get dd checked out a lot at gps when cranky - nine times our of ten I am right and know when she has an ear infection - always trust your instinct! mind you if they are eating and no temp I don't worry. they just sometimes have v unsettled nites - you must be shattered. 

mini - how do you feel about a CSection? hope you get the answer you want!  

alf, mini - I have pictures of you in my (tiny) head with enormous heads!! funny how these things are passed down. 

well I had a lovely day today - dd1 is much happier out the house so we have been at friends houses today - meaning lots of tea and cake for me. work feels like a distant memory! 

nite


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Medicine dummies do look useful - you put the syrup in the reservoir and then as the baby sucks they get the dose gradually.

If calpol or lidocaine teething gel don't help try Ashton and Parsons or Nelsons Teetha powders. I have found Ashton and Parsons powders like magic dust with friend's children. I heard today from someone that Teetha is even better. Worth a try.

Charley has been quite unsettled too and wakes up several times in the night and only getting a cuddle and possibly milk will help. Perhaps I should also give some teething remedies a try again. He woke with a snotty nose today so he has a cold too. 

Had a first rejection of food today. I whizzed up carrots, chicken and peas and he screamed. I tasted it and the texture was a bit rough. I mashed peas last week and mixed into puree and he ate it all without fuss. Perhaps blending them makes them unpalatable? I took it away because he was crying so hard. He nearly breathed in the uneaten mouthful. Perhaps I did the wrong thing and gave him something else. I melted some carrot and butternut squash puree and gave him some grated cheese to pick up himself instead. Should I have just made him have the first meal? So difficult to know if you are doing the wrong or right thing.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No u did the right thing I think mistletoe. He's too young to be messing u around.  If Ds refuses I give him yoghurt then try sgain with main meal.  If refuses again then I leave it.  It's taken me ages to get my head around him refusing food.  It's ufuslly around teeth they he gets really fussy.  

Carrie I got Ds a amber teething necklace.  It's supposed to excrete amber and make them calm if in pain.  I think it's worked to a certain extent.  You can get bracelets too.  Going to get baby one too!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Speeder I really don't want a section   it's not me with a big head


----------



## speeder

mini -   hark at me for calling you big headed as well....  . 

Holly - I think you did the right thing too.  you might also find charley loves the rejected dish next week - so keep offering it. since about 18 months I don't offer alternatives as often if dd refuses first option she isn't hungry and you end up offering 5 options and feel like a wally  .


----------



## pheobs1

Hiya, just a quickie,

Speeder I too have a tiny head! I've got lots of hair which helps me to look normal, but DH always feels my head and laughs and calls me pin head !!! 

Also bump is officially kicked in now. Doesn't feel or look swollen from pessaries anymore, it's all baby!
Xxx


----------



## Spaykay

I syringe medicine into DS as breastfed.

He smells...gotta go

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## carrie lou

Holly I think you did the right thing too, personally if Z doesn't want something I don't force it on him cos I don't want him to get "issues" about eating or food! Just one thought though, was it the first time you gave Charley chicken? Only the same thing happened the first time Z had chicken, he gagged on the first mouthful then refused to have any more. I think it was more to do with the new taste than the texture. So the next time I offered him chicken, I mixed a very small amount of the chicken puree with sweet potato (which he loves) and he gobbled it all up. Then gradually I increased the amount of chicken and decreased the amount of sweet potato. Now he eats it happily  

Mini - hope you can avoid c-section   

Pheobs glad bump is doing well   

Love to everyone. We are going to "buggy buddies" for the first time this morning


----------



## carrie lou

Oh and it's me with the big head


----------



## *ALF*

Carrie - how did last night go? Any more settled?

Holly - apparently you're supposed to offer a child something new 10 times before deciding they don't like it. Like Carrie suggested I always put it with things I knew DD did like and slowly built up the proportions. At this age you did the right thing to offer something different.


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## ceci.bee

MIni really hope your placenta moves hun              2cm is not far and it has 6 weeks or so to do it....................

Carrie so pleased Z has been cleared - what are they doing about the lazy eye?? I think Joshi also has one, but there is no one here in malawi to ask about it - oone of the probs of living far away

Mistletoe - have also had point blank refusals of food - it is distressing esp when you have made something tasty - I find like Carrie if I mix it with something I know he likes he usually will eat it, but often have abandoned meals only for him to eat them the next day.....

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## carrie lou

Ceci we've been referred to the orthoptist. According to the GP they very rarely do surgical corrections these days. Most of the time they just put a patch over the good eye to make the lazy one work harder. That's going to be fun   Doc said about 6-12 months is the right time to get it seen to otherwise the lazy eye doesn't make the right connections and you can end up with visual problems. Which is what happened to my DH whose parents claim they "didn't notice" his lazy eye until he was 6 years old! 

Alf - last night was not much better  though not quite as bad as the night before! I felt really sick last night with a headache so went to bed at 8.30 and actually got 9 hours sleep for the first time since Z was born!  It feels so odd to wake up in the morning and not feel as if I need another hour's sleep!


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## amandaloo

Mini - good luck with your placenta moving down will keep everything crossed for you   

Carrie - I've had a lot of unsettled nights lately some of it was illness as he wasn't eating as much and waking up hungry others unexplained   however things seem to be settling down again Now . Not sure if growth spurts Play a big part in things and teeth of course . Hope you are feeling better today x

Mistletoe- yes I give him something else if he refuses but will leave it a week then try it again as they say to do that 

Hak- your welcome   .. You know we are here anytime   . 

Hi to everyone I haven't mentioned 

I've got tonsillitis boohoo :-( my mum has helped out a bit today so had a sleep hope DS dosent catch it fingers crossed .


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Oh Amanda - it must be pants being ill and having to keep going.   

Carrie - interesting what you say about the lazy eye. I have been wondering for a while if Charley has one or not. I have a couple of photos of him where he has light reflection off one eye and not the other. Makes him look a bit cross eyed - not right if you see what I mean. And then another photo is perfect and the light is off the same point in each eye and it looks normal. I have bben checking the light reflection directly too and it mostly seems ok and only occasionally do I think he might have a problem.
I mentioned to the paediatrician that I wondered if he had a squint, but the doctor dismissed me. Can it be intermittent? If it is intermittent does that mean it is OK and will correct as the child ages?


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## speeder

Amanda - tonsillitis is rubbish   poor you. 

Holly - is a lazy eye the same as a squint? dd1 had a squint but it corrected itself and I didn't speak to the docs about it. but my friends little girls one persisted and she wears very cute glasses just to sort it out. I wonder what the age is that it should self correct by? so many babies look crisscross eyed - I think it's so cute  

phoebs - you are sixteen weeks already - wow! I get called pin head too  . I can wear hats designed for 4 year olds  .


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## carrie lou

Amanda - hope you feel better soon  

Holly - Z had a squint since he was born but it was intermittent, worse when he was tired I think. Sometimes his eyes seemed to be looking in completely different directions! I mentioned it at his 6 week check, Dr then couldn't see it but said she would talk to paediatrician at the hospital about it. She did and got back to me saying the paeds reckoned most squints correct themselves by 6 months and to review it then. In the meantime it got a lot less noticeable but I wasn't convinced it was 100% gone. Saw a different GP this week who noticed it immediately even before I mentioned it. He said if it hasn't corrected itself by 6 months that's when they refer to orthoptist to prevent long term damage to vision. As Charley is now over 6 months, I think perhaps you should bring it up with the doc again.


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## Spaykay

DD had it and I too was told that most corrext themselves but they'd keep an eye onit. It self corrected by 6 months. It's worth just checking

Ksy xxx


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## ceci.bee

Carrie thanks for the info - J also seems to have a slight discrepancy between both eyes but can't work out which is lazy and which is not! We are going to try to see someone here - harder than you think but we are going to the US in a few weeks so could use our insurance to see someone there to get some advice. Sometimes living in a developing country is really hard!

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## carrie lou

Ceci I'm also not sure which eye is "lazy" and which is good  but apparently the orthoptist does lots of clever measurements to find this out.  Hope you can get Joshi's seen to.


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## speeder

sorry for a me post - need the wise advice of you girls please....

Dhs parents absolutely adore dd1 and sometimes take her overnight. my mother in law is very very good with her and i do trust her with dd1. however I increasingly worry when dd1 stays at their house mainly because she an increasingly inquisitive toddler and because their house isn't geared up for her. 

it's not just the lack of stair gates - as that would be simple enough to remedy. Dhs father has terminal cancer and is on a cocktail of horrendous drugs. I have nightmares about dd getting her hands on these as I often have to move them out her reach when we are at their house. if father in law takes paracetomol he will leave an entire packet lying in her reach. I have found her playing with a paper knife left lying on a desk which she found. I often have to remind them to put pots on the back rings of stoves. 

so - they want to take dd this weekend and I am not happy about it as I won't be there. I don't want to offend my parents in law who I like very much. dh and I are rowing about it. it does not matter if my mother in law assures me - I dont think she realises that father in law leaves stuff lying. I have offered to stay at the house too and make myself scarce but they want dd to themselves! 

am I being unreasonable?! anyone have similar experience? am I overreacting? 

thanks lovely ladies!


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## speeder

sigh - dh and I have had a huge row about it... 

although he admitted when he is there he also constantly moves things out of reach too! 

I don't for one minute expect an elderly couple to rearrange their house for me - but I won't relax thinking of all the mischief dd could get up to! 

life is never simple......


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Can't dh have words with his parents? I always tell dh to tell them stuff. My bugbear is that she won't get a cot she just uses a travel cot which she leave up all the time. No gate at top of stairs.


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## speeder

my dh is the most chilled out man in the world re things like this (he is not generally chilled out hurrumph I should add  -  he thinks it's fine!!! but I have to remind him of stuff a lot - the other day he tried to give dd half a peanut .....  it's all made worse by the fact his parents are so unwell - and are lovely people - so dh feels he owes them this as it were. 

I think it's great he isn't a worrier like me as I am boring   but I always feel I have to look out for stuff - and his dad is the same as dh. 

dd is in a travel cot too and there are no stair gates but that is the least of it! I did gently say the other day to my father in law about the stuff lying around and he said - oh well you can't babyproof an entire house. i think that generation also brought their kids up differently too - father in law had to share a room with 5 siblings so prob thinks I am bananas!!

it's as well the dog loves me as I am about to make myself v unpopular


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## pheobs1

Speeder, sorry I don't have any wise advise, just wanted to let you know I feel your pain. My little one hasn't even been born yet and I'm having nightmares about MIL looking after them. She s really dizzy and I'm really anxious, she wants to go part time in work to look after them for two days a week, which I don't know how I will cope with. She makes mistakes taking care o my furbabies and even simple things like helping with housework. After one of my IUI's she came over to help clean, she put a harsh disinfectant on my oak floor to clean it and put a bowl of dog food down without separating the dogs which causes them to have huge fights! I know it's going to cause an argument with DH when it comes down to it. I totally understand your concerns and hope someone far wiser than me will be along soon to help you xxxxx


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## carrie lou

Ooh Speeder that's difficult   I have the same issues with my in-laws (made slightly easier by their living 3 hours away and neither of them speaking to me at present  ) Their house is a total death trap and there's no way I would let Z stay there when he is mobile. While it's  true that you can't expect them to re-arrange their house, you CAN expect them to show a little common sense when your DD is around and not leave dangerous things within her reach. Nothing should compromise her safety and I think you are well within your rights not to let her stay there without your supervision until they can show that they can be a little more sensible. It's nice that they want to spend time with her (my FIL hasn't seen Z for nearly 4 months and shows no interest in him but that's a different story  ) but they need to understand that if they want to have her to stay, they need to make a few changes first.   Hope it works out OK for you.


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## juju81

Have to agree with carrie. I think it's lovely that they want to spend time with her. I personally think tho u either have I trust them to baby proof their house enough or don't let her stay. Staying but making yourself scarce would make them feel u don't trust them so I say all or nothing!  My mil smokes in her house. We told her outright she wasn't to do it whilst Noah was there, I'd rather they didn't do it full stop but who are we to tell them what to do in their own home! She doesn't smoke when Noah there now. Noah sleeps in a travel
Cot there too. I don't really have a problem with this either.

Hope u sort this out xx

P.s does DD have a but allergy


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## Spaykay

Speeder - my MIL is elderly and I find knives, pills, open windows (4th floor flat!) etc so DD and DS are only there if I am. She faints too so I only let her hold DS sitting with my eye on her. DH let her hold him whilst he napped...çi had to actually show him MIL asleep with DS in her arms. She doesn't see the danger and DH is oblivious too!!! DH worries about non dangerous activities though and will also give DD nuts and boikled sweets...a bit clueless!

Kay xxx


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## *ALF*

Speeder - quick post but I agree with everything that Carrie has said.


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## hakunamatata

speeder we love you too hun and i agree it would all be very worrying. i would be inclined to tackle it and keep her at home where you know she is safe. x tackling in laws can be hard and obv not popular. take care of you x


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## carrie lou

Goodness me ... I wonder if it's so long since our parents' generation had to worry about baby-proofing that they've forgotten all about it? Mind you I don't think my in-laws have ever been very clued up. When DH was 6 months old, MIL left a lighted candle in his nursery while he was asleep in there, the curtains went on fire and FIL had to rush in and rescue baby DH  Telling this story reminds me why I don't let MIL out of my sight with Z!


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## teresal

what is it with in laws, does any of us have in laws that we can trust or get on with, mine haven't seen meredith for 2 months again the last time was 3 months and they have only seen her walking once, i now have the attitude that its their loss BUT i would NEVER let them look after meredith for 5 minutes never mind over night, but like some of your dh's mine won't say anything to them must be a male thing not wanting to upset their parents (wish mine would get a backbone with them sometimes)   . am kind of hoping that the next time we see them they say something to annoy me and then i can let rip cos i have so much that needs to be said but dh just says leave it but i can't be    with them anymore

xx


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## amandaloo

Omg what horror stories   

Well if my parents or his parents were like that there would be no way I'd let my ds stay unless they were willing to compromise on safety. Why can't pills be left high up in cupboards most ppl do this even if they don't have children ?  I've got to admit I don't have any of these problems I've now realised how lucky I am after reading the posts  . I really hope you can't sort it out speeder x


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## juju81

Teresa  

Amanda apart from the smoking I haven't really got a prob with mine either. I mean she child minds him whilst I'm at work and both my parents and nicks have him overnight quite often for us! I couldn't imagine it being so bad that they'd never have him!


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## carrie lou

Teresa your in-laws sound as bad as mine  My FIL hasn't seen Z since he was 4 months old, he's missed half his life almost  He couldn't even be bothered to visit his only grandchild for his first Christmas. He won't speak to me or DH at the moment because of the row we had back in October (the one in which MIL accused me of being a liar and a fraud and breaking my wedding vows  ). Anyway you are absolutely right it is entirely THEIR loss, our babies are growing and changing every day and they are missing it all, and you can't get that back.


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## northernmonkey

Speeder - you're not over-reacting at all.  You wouldn't send dd to a nursery that had drugs and knives lying around so why should you make allowances because it's your in-laws?  You're not being unreasonable, it sounds as though you value the relationship that your dd has with her grandparents but at the end of the day it's her safety that takes priority.  I won't even allow my girls to visit my inlaws house because their dog has badly bitten fil on several occasions so I don't want it anywhere near my kids (it's only a westie but is a nasty little s**t   )  - so I think you're being more than fair offering to go along for the weekend too rather than just refusing the visit full stop.  Couldn't you and dh tell them a little white lie and say dd has been a bit clingy/unsettled since baby arrived and say that's why it would be better if you go with her?  That way everyone's kind of happy without anyone being offended (then you can gather evidence of their unsuitablility for unsupervised visits in advance of them asking next time    )


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## speeder

thanks all - really appreciate your views, as always.  

can't believe it's such a topical subject! wonder if there is a website for grannies who all moan about their neurotic daughters in law  .  

anyway I ended up being honest with mil. she took it ok - acknowledged the house wasn't great but said she would have minded dd 24 hours a day (mmmm not possible with a toddler methinks) dh is just being a pain about it - he feels we owe it to them as a reward for all their help.  .  anyway I am not backing down so that's that.

I am so so sorry to hear about parents in law who aren't seeing their grandchildren - that is sad and they are missing so much. carrie - how awful about your fil. teresa - why haven't they seen m? in fairness I get on v well with my p-I-l - I now realise how lucky I am! 

nm - I don't like westies - they are little nippers and like to rule the roost! all the best with tx this month. 

thanks again girls - you are all fab x


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## Wraakgodin

Just your temp volunteer sticking her head round the corner!!!   

My aunt and uncle have a westie and it has bitten both of them more than once so I won´t let my daughter anywhere near it, if he does that to his owners, think what he would do to Isabella who would just run up to him and want to give him a hug?  what would happen if she tried to take a toy off him?  He is just too unpredictable.  My aunt understands, but my uncle isn´t speaking to me over it!  I am not going to apologise for putting my daughters safety first.

Don´t speak to me about m-i-l's!!  

Sue


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## speeder

hello wraakgoddin  

my dog walker babysits a westie and it bites nearly everyone but her - yikes. she has had dogs all her life and she reckons they need a really firm hand and everyone babies them instead because they are cute - big mistake! 

I was bitten by a little dog as a kid so I only like big dogs. I am still a bit scared of yappy little things as they are so unpredictable


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## amandaloo

Just to say Ive got a westie and she's a little angel  never bitten anyone and is very loving . She's getting on a bit now though going a bit deaf in her old age . Has been as good as gold with DS . However an animal is an animal and I'm always very careful ..

Speeder- glad you've spoken to the inlaws Hope they have listened x


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## speeder

sorry if I offended you Amanda re your doggie - I get upset when folk criticise my doggys breed. just goes to show it's the owner usually and not the dog 

right now I would sooner trust my dog alone with dd2 than dd1 who tries to "keep her warm" with blankets and toys and tried to headbut her yesterday! my long suffering dog is a gentleman


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## Wraakgodin

Amandaloo, it is nothing against the breed, it is against the dog, I hope it doesn´t come across as "Westie bashing".  I know people who have got westies and they are lovely animals.  I am just wary of Bertie because he bit his owners, and i know how Isabella is!  If I know she is going to be in the company of dogs I always check the temperament, my other aunt has a retriever and it is a soppy old thing that loves children, Isabella had a great time with him!!  

Sue


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## Fizzypop

I don't think it matters what type of dog you've got, there is always something! If mine sees a toddler 'running' he goes full pelt to run with them even if it's only across lounge. Not looking forward to when dd is on her feet! Oh and she is obsessed with him, touching him at every opportunity and dog trying to return this affection with licks. I am gonna have my hands full with these two!


Oh and on the mil thing, mine used to really wind me up but since having dd I have become far more tolerant!!! And she is completely ott on the safety thing which annoys me - but reading your posts I should be v grateful for that!


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## speeder

fizzy - it's adorable watching the dog and toddler playing.    ever since I found dd1 teething on one of the dogs chew toys -yuk - I have chilled out about the licking. 

be v grateful for your m-in-law!


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## northernmonkey

Amanda -just to clarify, I wasn't westie bashing either!!    It comes down to the usual case of bad owner rather than bad dog - my fil is a total softie who treats his dogs like babies and doesn't understand that they need a pack leader.  From what dh has told me, his dad has always allowed their dogs to rule the roost and just about every one they have owned have bitten him (and other people) in the past.  Don't get me wrong, our dogs have always been spoilt rotten but ultimately they know who's boss!  
Speeder - glad you spoke to mil, hope you're feeling a bit better about it.  You need to be enjoying these early days with new baby, not worrying about other things. Thanks for good luck message - AF arrived today so got first scan tomorrow.  Am bricking it now - think I must be well and truly crazy to be going for # 3.... 
dd just waking up so better go, bye for now.
x


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## teresal

speeder, they just haven't bothered coming down to see her, sent some money at xmas cos they didn't know what she is into or what size to buy, then sent a cheque the other day (for no reason) my friend and i have decided its guilt money cos they can't be bothered to see her, they go and see their grandsons every other weekend and its not any further to theirs than ours, so as i've said before its their loss and suits me fine, the less i see of them the better and the less dh and i fall out


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## amandaloo

Eh don't be worrying ppl I wasn't offended at all ). I wouldn't trust any animal would always supervise you just never know 

Just taken DS swimming for first time he loved it . But what a performance ! Went to one place they  said wasn't open til 130 and was 40 mins off so didnt want to wait so went to Another we got lost lol took us ages to figure out how to get in I'd forgot !!! Had to ring my dad . Baby pool had had a leak but they said we could go in the adult bit but there was a class on !!! we nearly didn't but we messed about that much we gave in and went it lol ! phew !


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## hakunamatata

sounds exciting amanda, the swim not finding the pool. i bought some little swimmers tonight, do you think im getting ahead of myself lol. just so excited. xxxxx

hope all you girls are well. hubby pushed me around tesco tonight in a wheelchair, gosh that was interesting but good to be out and get the last few bits for hospital bag, ohhhhh exciting x


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## Fizzypop

Hak - DD is 4.5 months now and is still too small for huggies little swimmers - well she fits in the xs ones but I could only get them in a pack of 6 with a really thin towel and that is an expensive way of doing it. Did you go to Tesco's by any chance...half price nappy sale, lol


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

ASDA swim nappies are very good. DS loves sing song in the pool that the children's centre run near us. He has a lovely baby warmer from mothercare too to keep out the cold. Made of neoprene.

Speeder - My MIL has alread made it plain that she and FIL will not be looking after C - ever. She manages to make up nearly 20 x 12lbs hay nets every day, but says that she can't lift C and therefore can't baby sit. Sort of suits me because they have an enormous German Shepherd male dog that I would not trust near the baby in a million years, and a pond. They had a new patio built in October which now leaves direct access to the pond from the conservatory door.  They are quite good about other things and their house is probably currently more baby proof than ours in a lot of ways.

My Dad is the difficult one as he dotes on C and is starting to suffer from mild dementia. I have to remind him not to have hot tea while holding C, not to leave him unattended on the sofa and to make sure that he is not eating paper or electric wires etc. He tries pretty hard to maintain safety, but he just does not see it the way I do. If I leave C with Dad while I go to make dinner or out to the car or upstairs, I tell him how I want him to be minded in my absence and remind him of all the hazards in the area. I try to keep an eye every few minutes. I'd never go out - I am always in listening, looking and monitoring distance, but still let him have the time. I have still found that he will fall asleep or get a little distracted sometimes and C will be on his way to get up to something. Eyes in the back of the head needed!
My Dad told me of a story about when he was left looking after me while my mum made dinner - I went up to the half landing of the stairs and my mum came in to check on me and asked my Dad where I was - he hadn't noticed! 
So I am not sure it is an age thing - perhaps it is just a man thing?


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## speeder

hak - how exciting you getting last minute things for hosp bag  . allthough are you and baby planning to swim home?!  .  of all the things that dd does, swimming is by far her favourite. she can now splash her little legs and arms whilst daddy holds her tummy and move in the water and can swim a few strokes under water. 

Amanda - how stressful but glad you made it  

Holly - you are right about the man thing. their brains are wired differently - in oh so many ways. is dh the same? my dh is the "fun" one who throws dd in the air etc - mind he gets her to giggle and laugh in a way I don't quite manage! it's lovely you make sure your dad gets quality time with c  

Teresa - that's awful - why would they show less interest in their granddaughter? that makes me so mad!! they are so lucky to have their grandkids nearby. 

good luck n m - I think it's lovely you are going for number three  . if I could persuade dh, win the lottery I would do the same ! 

well amazing little dd2 now sleeps from 1030 till 3 - which I am so happy about as she isn't 5 weeks yet. takes me ages to settle her after that though. I think I thought she would be like dd1 and if course she is not - her own unique lovely little person! she has so far rejected bottles of expressed breast milk hmmmmm which I will need to work on - what do you reckon the most newborn friendly baby teats are? the avent ones seem too big for her cute little mouth! 

speeder xx


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## amandaloo

Speeder- yes it was stressful however I kept calm but you should have seen dh thought he was going to blow a gasket ! I used tommee tippee but didn't try any others as he never had a problem with them so can't help really . 

Hak -  love the fact you are that organised and got little swimmers already. I don't really know when you can first take them swimming? but I waited for him to have all his jabs first that was me guessing !! Then Xmas and illness got in the way plus not having all the gear to take him too . My mum ended up getting him a floatie for Xmas . And we've still only just gone . Would like to go once a week now though . Best of luck not long left now x


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## carrie lou

Think they can go swimming as young as 3 months - Zac started at 15 weeks, he was a little anxious at first but now he LOVES his weekly swimming lesson and does the most energetic splashes I've ever seen! It's so lovely seeing him getting more confident week by week  My mum is coming swimming with us this weekend. We also use Asda swim nappies, they're very good, and a little wetsuit. 

Hakuna sounds like you are all organised, how exciting! Not long to go for you now  

NM I think it's great you are going for No 3, not mad at all!  I've always wanted 3 babies, not sure if we'll be that lucky but it's still my dream


----------



## amandaloo

Just a quick question which might sound really thick so bear with me ! When I took DS swimming yesterday used a floatie . Was I supposed to take him out of it as well ? I know there's no set rules but was just wondering what others do ! X


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## hakunamatata

thanks girls i know im getting ahead of myself, they were only 2.75 lol. i will check asda out. would like to take her quite early. will obv check with midwife after shots makes sense. well im drowning in washing lol. never realised she had so much. took the longest time just to remove all packets tags and sort. wish i had done it earlier when i had more energy but great fun. doing first load of ironing was so cute. xx


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## Fizzypop

Amanda - it really depends on how you feel about him swimming...I have booked DD and myself onto a swimming course starting in feb because I am not confident enough in the water to take her myself. As pinkcat says they teach things like holding on to edge, floating, etc. But then when I was a kid (god I sound old), I remember starting out with the float thing and building confidence from there and that was school age!


Round our way we have a pool specially designed for babies and you can take them from birth. Google baby swimming birthlight and you should get pools in your area. Our local public pool stipulate first lot of jabs needed before can go.


Thanks for tip on Asda swim nappies will have a look.


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## amandaloo

Pinkcat - I just meant I had DS in a floatie all the time I was in there . One of them things that you blow up and they sit in ( sorry if you already know that !). I was wondering if I should have taken him out of it too. And wondered what others do . 

Fizzy- Thanks for info on swimming courses will have a look


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## amandaloo

Ps hakuna - how exciting I remember doing what your doing x


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## carrie lou

Amanda I've not used a floatie either, I suppose he is still so little it won't really matter whether he's in or out of it - as long as he's happy  

Hakuna I remember the getting things ready stage too, I still think of it as one of the happiest times of my life - enjoy it hun   For me it was spring so I washed all the baby clothes and hung them on the washing line. Then spent ages just looking at them flapping in the sunshine


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## Fizzypop

Hak - I meant to say that too. Its such a special time getting bag ready and washing all the clothes. Like pinkcat there are now only one or two items I iron! Must admit have a slight pang of jealously at the getting ready but. Think I'm getting broody again...DD now attempting to roll over, sit up with support, getting ready for weaning...said to dh last night she's not my baby anymore! Then watched one born every minute and it just made me want a bump


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## juju81

You can take babies from birth. They don't need to have had their injections like in the old days. Noah was only 4wks I think when we took him! He's Ben having swimming lessons for a year but I stopped them in September because he kep having a tantrum when he couldn't stop and play with the watering can   I now take him on a mother and baby session and take a bag full of bits for him
To play with! My mums a swimming instructor which is handy!

Amanda, it's entirely up to you if he stays in the floatie. I used to do both just so I knew he wasn't getting cold!

He's in arm bands now.....he's all grown up


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - that is very efficient doing ironing of baby clothes - LOL - probably the first and last time they will see an iron if my life with baby is anything to go by! There just isn't the time and life is too short. Ha! But then I never iron anything. It has not been switched on even for over a year.

Yes they do have lots. I find that as I get things out for the next quarter, some of the stuff he has from since newborn still fit, so we are drowning in clothes now and he can't possibly wear them all. I bought nice things as I saw them in charity shops. Then we got given loads of presents from everybody very kindly. Then last month the ladies at the childrens centre kept an enormous bag of boys clothes that someone donated back for Charley as they thought they would suit him - I could not really turn them down, and they are nice. I will of course pass them back to the childrens centre for the next little boy(s) once C has grown out of them. I also find it hard to stop using some of the favourite items, even when they get a bit small. Some of the clothes are so cute and he has only worn them a few times. I have just had to go and buy   some 6-9 month short sleeved body suits, because despite all of the hundreds of trousers, tops, cardigans and other bits and pieces we don't have any vests that fit. 0-3 months is now pulling right down the chest and leaving a big gap and we only have a few 3-6 months, which to be honest are also squashing the nether regions with the now size 4 nappies.

I do love baby clothes though - so cute! Feels like dressing dolly from when I was little, but 200 times better!

Also not sure if it was this thread we were discussing weight - had C weighed today 30 weeks, or 6 & 3/4 months and he is 16lbs 12oz or 7.6 Kg now just on 25th centile line.


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## speeder

hak honey meant to ask why you in the wheelchair - sorry if I missed that - are you ok? hope it's not horrid spd  . I love buying baby clothes  

Holly - I don't iron either  . not even bed linen - but it looks so much nicer when ironed . 

weighed dd2 today - up to 75th centile and 10 pounds 11 at 5 weeks. at this stage with dd1 she had stopped gaining weight and was flying down the chart and I would cry at the weekly weigh in so it was a relief today.


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## northernmonkey

I'm obviously just weird cos I'm the only person I know who chooses to iron my girls' clothes despite usually despising ironing!  I just love how little and cute all their things are and once upon a time I feared I'd never see baby clothes in this house so I get real pleasure out of doing it - I even iron their vests and pjs.      
amanda - glad the swimming was a success.  We haven't used floaties either so can't help I'm afraid.  
Fizzypop - isn't it sad that they don't stay small for long.  Do we take from your comments that you'll be trying for #2 soon?   Did you see the barbie doll woman on One Born Every Minute last week?  Hard as nails is the expression that springs to mind.
Pinkcat - do you do waterbabies swimming lessons?  Your description sounds familiar - both our girls have gone since 12 weeks old and dd#1 has been swimming unaided since age 2 - not for a great distance admittedly but her confidence in the water is amazing.  I was never taught to swim properly and was always nervous in the water and really didn't want the girls to end up like that.  
Hakuna - isn't it surreal looking at all the little outfits and thinking that a little person will be wearing them in a few weeks?  Enjoy the excitement and anticipation of the next few weeks, it's such a special time.
Holly - is your dad living with you now?  He sounds like a very sweet grandad.  
Speeder - good going on the sleep front!  Can't advise on the teat issue sorry, dd is 21 months old and I've never managed to get a bottle into her.  She went from boob to cup, all she did with a teat was chew!
AFM - thanks for your support ladies.  Had our first scan today and all went well so start injecting tomorrow.  I've had so many concerns about whether it was right to go for a third baby, mainly because it is hard work with two children and I worried that I'd go from a mediocre mother of 2 to a totally rubbish mum of 3! But when we left the hospital this morning everything just felt right and I'm so excited now.  Who knows whether we'll be successful - at the moment I'm saying that we'll give it a couple of cycles then call it a day but dh is talking about 4 or 5 attempts....  I have a feeling now that after a couple of failed cycles I won't be quite so keen to give up but I want to try to keep the sensible head on, after all we have two fantastic girls and I don't want to bankrupt us!
Right, got to go.  DD#2 not sleeping well at the mo so I'm expecting a 5.30 wake up call. 
Take care.
x


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## Fizzypop

I would love to try for no. 2 fairly soon but I've got a significant amount of weight to shift to get me down to a healthy BMI so want to do that first then try again when I'm healthy and hopefully avoid the bp issues from this pg. Only just started watching one born every minute but may well watch the catch ups! I would also try for no. 3 if we are lucky enough for no. 2 but dh is making me stop, so all I can hope for is two little embie stick and I get twinnies. You can all say I told you so if that happens!!!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I iron!


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## Spaykay

I hate ironing. The cleaner irons EG's school uniform. 

Mistltoe - such a relief to read there's someone else whonever irons

Haku - I remember that tiny clothes on the washing line feeling 

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

I dutifully ironed everything before Z was born, all linen, and of course all his baby clothes ... now though, different story - much more selective. DH is lucky if he has a shirt ironed for work in the morning!  

All this talk of trying for the next baby - I can't believe how broody I am already  Would absolutely love another but with my sensible hat on I think we will wait a bit longer for a variety of reasons - Z still not sleeping through the night, still BF and no AF yet, and of course can't afford more treatment just yet. One day though


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## ceci.bee

I know I moan a lot about the disadvantages of living in Africa - big advantage is can afford full time nanny and housekeeper while at work so even my pants get ironed    we are getting totally spoiled for the eventual return to our london flat.....

Carrie I know what you mean about being broody - am also massively broody for number 2. But read some interesting research saying that oldest child development is better if sibilings spaced more than 18 months and ideally 2 years from each other, as older child doesn't get read to etc as much if mum dealing with a new baby when older child is 18 months -2 years - interesting and defo made me think about waiting for TTC for number 2.....

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## carrie lou

Ooh I definitely wouldn't want them closer than 18 months! I was thinking of starting to try again when Z is 18 months old so the gap would be closer to 2.5 years. Although my sister and I are less than 2 years apart and my mum has memories of BFing my sister and reading to me at the same time while I sat on her shoulder... I guess you do things a little differently when you have 2!


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## amandaloo

Ceci & carrie- I'm starting tx again soon after I go back to wrk . If I wait till I go back to wrk I'll get my full mat pay entitlement. I'm not due back until end of June and I've already been thinking of booking a clinic appt !


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## hakunamatata

love reading this thread ladies, think im just brimming over with excitement lol. 
speeder im in wheelchair because of my hip/back. seen physio but not much can be done. i am getting some relief at the mo, she has shifted to the other side now. not how midwifes ideally want her but i will take the light relief. im sure she'll move back. 
been ironing this morning girls. only did a batch for 40 mins to pace myself. may tackle some more later. im enjoying it actually and they look so lovely. but fully take on board things may change with less time and energy lol. 
another nct session tomorrow, all good xx
we are considering a number 2 and would need to try when iccle one is about one as my clock will be ticking. i only really want to try iui again as dont feel ivf worked for me. have consultant, diabetic appointment and scan on tes to check iccle ones progress. lets hope shes about 5 and a half pound now x


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## juju81

NM - I have a few friends who are mothers of 3 and do u know they all said that they found the transition from 1 baby to 2 really hard but 2 to 3 was nothing! Can kind of see their point. Your'll be fine x

I've decided I want another one. We don't have any money for it tho. And I'm not sure I can go through the tx. I felt I put my life on hold whilst having Noah and not sure I can do it again or it's fair in him  

I want to 'do a mini' and have a natural miracle   not that that will work if I'm having the coil on Monday  

Life's to short for ironing......I don't even own one


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## amandaloo

Juju- what's a mini?


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Me!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju - Get yourself sorted first, use the coil to rest your body for a bit.    

With number 2 the toddler will adapt and you will be able to read while feeding, plus the 1st child will be learning other new skills as in looking after the baby and teaching the baby things. Whatever the age there will be problems. 

These things you cannot plan most of the time.


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## amandaloo

lol totally read that wrong !! Thanks mini for clearing that up


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## northernmonkey

bo**ocks, I just lost a huge post    and don't have time to type it all out again now cos got to take the girlies to soft play.  
Ceci -  amongst everything else I was going to say the same as Mini about the age gap!  In my experience it's the youngest that takes the back seat! (not in the early days perhaps but certainly when things have settled down.)  to be honest I wouldn't pay too much attention to the article and I certainly wouldn't let it put you off having another - we mums make ourselves feel guilty about enough stuff that we feel we're doing wrong without things like that playing on our minds.   
right, got to run
NMx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I think it's healthy for either child to have to wait for attention. Baby number 2 will be on the floor or in chair anyway while the older one plays.


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## Spaykay

With 2, the one that can't complain has to wait  Although the screaming does hurt! Breastfeeding with another on you reading a story can get hard. It's wild but lovely too. We have a 2 year 3 month gap...what I would have chosen if I'd thought I could do it naturally. We really were lucky.

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

Yes my sis and I were really close as kiddies and still are, we were best friends when we were younger and learnt to share. I don't think either of us suffered from having such a close age gap (she was born exactly 1 month before my 2nd birthday). I think if you want another you should just go for it when you are ready, it will all turn out fine, I'm sure it is harder with 2 but you just get on with it and it will be lovely


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## juju81

If I could choose I'd have my next one when Noah's at school!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I wonder why


----------



## speeder

little update on m-I-law issue girls....I spent most of yday crying and now am furious. 

after five years of an excellent relationship with my in laws, m-I-law has said I am no longer welcome in their house and does not want to speak to me again. I was told this on the phone after I phoned yesterday to see why she hadn't shown up for our prearranged trip with dd to soft play. I was so flipping mad she had not even the courtesy to phone and say she wasn't coming. there i was just waiting after giving up my day so she could see dd. apparently father in law has written a letter to dh - yes a letter - even though he speaks to his parents all the time -  to say how offended they are. 

they agree their house is not toddler proof but have said I have personally insulted them because they would be able to look after her despite that - so apparently I am implying they are unfit carers. m-in-law seems oblivious to all the hazards I mention - apparently a child playing with drugs  wouldn't eat them for example!!!!! thinks paper knives and glass vases can be left lying. thinks dd would not open cupboards. 

anyway after treading softly all these years I told her she was childish - for being so silky about it - rude for not phoning me to cancel - and I listed everything in the house that isn't toddler proof. and why I was so horrified at new year to find dd unattended playing with the paper knife. 

dh is on my side. I have never met such silly people. in my family if there is an issue we all yell and scream and talk about it openly. apparently m-i-l did not speak to her husband for 6 months after a minor row. 

so after being so upset yday - I hate arguments - I am furious - absolutely mad!!!!! have said to dh that dd1 isn't going to their house again - where I am no longer welcome - until they have sat down with me to discuss making it safe. 

anyway.....bloody parents in law!!!!!

hak - ouch - how weird that baby moving helps - must be a pressure thing? hopefully relieved once here? x

we have a 2 year 4 month gap - and dd1 has taken the new arrival badly. in hindsight less of a gap would have been even harder on her - maybe it depends in the child. 

good luck nm with tx!!!!!


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## hakunamatata

speeder so sorry to hear this hun, not what you neeed sweetie. i hope they mature and speak to you soon. glad dh is supporting you, not easy for anyone. you only did what any mother would do    . still getting some relief which is nice. was even tempted to try and go out with hubby and ruby but thought maybe bridge to far with nct class today, maybe tomorrow if still good. all washing hanging up. ironing still to do, will tackle tomorrow, so rewarding. hubby so tired last night he was asleep from 7.20!! best he sleeps now lol xx

morning all you lovely ladies xx


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## Spaykay

Speeder - I'm so sorry ((())) Also, DD1 will start to settle soon hun. Jealousy us so hard. I constantly feel guilty about not being able to give DD my all...but it's probably good for her in the long run. We have same gap as u. In the future they'll be a great support to each other. Iss ur sleep getting better?

Kay xxx


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## juju81

Mini     it wouldn't be good for my sanity lol

Speeder, that's awful hun. Maybe when you have all calmed down you might be able to resolve this?? Can I just ask, what's a paper knife? U don't just mean pretend do u? Sorry I'm being    don't worry about the jealouy bit, I don't think it matters what age gap u have there will always be that. My aunt had a baby 12years after her first and even he got jealous!


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## Fizzypop

Oh speeder, that is awful. At least it's all out in the open now and hope you can get it sorted soon x


Hak - not long now  so very excited for you. My friend had baby sitting on her sciatic nerve and was in a lot of pain towards end - she ended up being induced early because of it. 


If things go to plan for us we will end up with 2 and 1/4 year age gap. Now wondering if it should be a bit more! Thing is I'm an only child and so am v keen for dd to have a playmate...


So now she is 4.5 months she is starting to try to roll over and is trying to do it in her sleep! This often results in her on her side with an arched back, head pulled back but mouth and nose facing down to mattress. Have spent quite a few nights putting her on back and she rolls back. Last night dh got the tummy time pillow wedged it beside her and she picked it up, chucked it and turned on side. We thought arched back might mean wind(so have been giving infacol) but then it's same movement she makes during day trying to turn. Any ideas ladies? Or is this completely normal and I'm just being paranoid mummy


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## speeder

I think once they can roll the theory is they can roll back if they get into difficulty so I wouldn't worry too much fizzy


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## juju81

Hak, just wanted to say actually I really feel For you with ur spd. I had it bad and unfortunately all 
My labour pains we're in my pelvic bone which made for an even mor excruciating labour. It's true that the intense pain near enough goes straight away but nearly 2 years on I still feel it if I swing my legs apart or move them together awkwardly or tmi but going on top when having a bit! That's a big no no! Not trying to scare u but just to say be prepared and take the physio that will be offered afterwards.

Fizzy, is she proper head down? Thing is u could be doing this all Night for weeks. Noah slept on his belly at 3wks old and we used to keep checking on him. Once she can roll back again I would try not to worry too much! Bless her. She's so dinky


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## carrie lou

Speeder I'm so sorry about your in-law trouble honey. As I'm sure everyone here will remember  I have had extensive problems with my own in-laws which are in fact still ongoing so I really don't think I can offer much advice except to say that you did the right thing and I'm sending lots of        and hope you feel better soon. It's really not fair of them to cause this stress to you when you have a toddler and a newborn to look after. Oh and I'm sure DD1 will come round to the new baby. According to my mum I kicked my newborn baby sister (only once though  ) and asked if we could send her back where she came from (the hospital) when I'd had enough of her crying  but as I said we became very good friends.


Fizzy my little man has taken to babbling and trying to crawl in his sleep  Apparently when they are going through a development spurt i.e. learning lots of new things, they can feel the urge to practise their new skills at night, Like speeder says if she can get herself face down then she'll be strong enough to get out of difficulty if she needs to.


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## Fizzypop

Ju - I'll look tonight...am sure I'm just being paranoid


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## juju81

I feel ur paranoia   if Noah doesn't wake at his normal time and sleeps in I make nick go in incase something's happened


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I went through that with Charley Fizzy. He would constantly practice his rolling in his dreams and end up arched and face flat on mattress. I tried rolling him onto his back or turning his head but he would put it back. Got a very good night sleep when I gave up after turning him 5 times one night. The rule is that you are supposed to try and move them back if they are under 6 months old, but you can only do it a few times or only when you happen to find them like that. Otherwise no one gets any sleep. 

Speeder - parents in law are very tricky. Hope they see your point of view.

Juju - a paper knife is a handle with a not very sharp edged, but very pointed thin blade used for getting into the corner of an envelope and slicing it open very neatly or dividing folded paper in two. Definitely not something for a little one to play with. If they ran and fell on it it would easily go through an eye or chest.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju - you are too young to know about paper knives   

Fizzy - I wouldn't worry hun. Once they can roll there is nothing you can do.  they will be able to breathe through The mattress. She'll soon move or cry if shes not comfy.   

Speeder - OMG can't beleive whats happended    My mum moves things at the last minute after me telling her to baby proof the place but she thinks everything will be ok until everything gets smashed    but they'd never ever be like your ILs    
When i was about 18mths old i stayed at my nannys house and managed to swallow lots of paracetamol that was left lying around. I ended up having my stomach pumped. Then when my sister was about 3 she found  a tube of super glue and chewed it and her teeth were glued together       obviously it could of been very dangerous    they managed to soirt it out (shame!    ) but my mum ended up being interviewed by social services    It was a genuine mistake. This was 33 yrs ago.  But maybe you need to remind them that if LO ends up in hosptial they will invollve SS if they feel they have been neglected in any way. 

My sister came along when i was 6. It was the worst thing my mum ever did. She admits that too! I was so jealous, and it affected me for years. ALl i wanted to do was go and play with my friends but she wanted to flollow me, who wants a 3 yr old following you at the age of 9     The age gap was too big. even now we can't tolerate each other.


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## juju81

Ah yeah I do know, the old cronies at work have them to open their envelopes!

There's 16months between me and my younger sister and 3years between me and my older sister. I isn't play with either of them! We occasionally all plate together but it wasn't until we were older (bit like pinkcat) that we really got to know each other. I'm mega close to my older sister and probably would be with my younger but she lives in London and only see her a handful of time a year!


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## Spaykay

Fizzypop - if you're worried u can always buy a monitor that beeps if the baby stops breathing

Kayy xxx


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## ceci.bee

Fizzy hun I agree with the others that once she can turn she will be able to turn herself back and can move her head to breathe. Do you have a mattress with ventilation holes? We have one so even if J rolls over and sleeps face down (now all the time!) I don't worry about him not being able to breathe.

Speeder hun            to your in laws - what a nightmare for you I hope they grow up soon and see that you are only acting out of concern for the safety of your child, and to tell you otherwise is really shocking           . I am also sure DD1 will get over her jealousy, especially if you can involver her in helping look after the baby and make her feel important, and also plan to have someone help with the baby from time to time so you can still spend special time with her. I am one of 3 girls and 1 boy with an average of 2-3 years between each of us, and we were all jealous of the new baby when the next one turned up - it is totally normal, as most toddlers are totally egocentric and when a new baby comes along and takes away some of the attention they are used to, they will play up, but will get past it!

Ju good luck with your decision about number 2 - try not to be put off by the cost if poss, as debt will eventually get paid back (we are still over a year away from finishing paying for our tx to make Joshi), and the baby will be there forever. As you had such a bad labour last time wtih your SPD you could always request a CS for number 2 - just something to think about, and I am sure Noah would be a fabulous big bro.......

Hakuna am so excited for you sweetie and hope the birth goes well, you will be a fabulous mum!

Carrie I am so sorry your in laws are still being horrible - any signs of a reconcilliation??

AFM - DH's brother is getting married in March, in california !!!!! while I am excited about the wedding, it is soooooooo far from Malawi and will take us about 36-48 hours flying to get there (and I am already having sleepless nights about how much it will cost). any tips on helping Joshi make the journey and jet lag with as minimal stress as possible??

lots of love to all
Ceci


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## juju81

Thanks ceci, we literally have no money tho to have tx! We'll only have more should we eve come into some money!  Wowed that's a long flight. Not sure if do it! Not really sure I can advise either, I'd probably be asking the same! How long do u think U'll be in Malawi for? Do u have a property to go back to?


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## carrie lou

Ceci - no advice to give on the flight I'm afraid, I am having nightmares about going to Ireland for a week in Feb, especially since DH dropped the bombshell that we can only bring one 20kg suitcase between the 3 of us  (men  ) but good luck, it sounds like a fabulous trip! 

Re the in-laws - FIL wanted us to meet up with him for a "frank discussion" at a point midway between our house and theirs but said not to bring "the baby" (this is how he refers to his only grandchild) as it would not be a suitable environment for him. Needless to say I declined this offer. He wants us on neutral ground so that he can yell at us more easily. If he wants to build bridges he can come to our house - we have invited him but he won't come. Because he knows if he says anything out of line I will ask him to leave. I'm not prepared to put myself through any more of this, there have been days when I thought I was getting post natal depression because of what they've done to me, I couldn't stop crying, couldn't look after my baby properly  and I'm so angry with MIL because she knows what it's like to be a new mother with a mental health problem but she still did this to me. So they can see DH and Zac but they are nothing to me anymore. Sorry to go on everyone, you must all be sick of my saga by now, I know I am


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## juju81

I did a flight with Noah when he was 15monhs old! We went to gran canaria   

Carrie   check ur airline because Noah got 10kgs even tho we didn't pay for him and he didn't get a seat!


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

We did a 4 hour flight at 15 mths.  Coming back was horrendous  

Not sure what baby stumpy is doing but it hasn't stopped wriggling for about half hour  

Carrie is dh talking to his parents at all?


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## juju81

It's all those cakes uve eaten


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## juju81

I mean the ones u baked tho arvo


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## carrie lou

Nah I've double checked - Zac gets no baggage allowance except the pushchair  The 10kg is apparently only for long haul flights  

Yes DH is speaking to his parents but only just. Zac was a big wriggler as a bump too, some days he never seemed to stop! Got quite uncomfortable towards the end cos I could feel he didn't have much space left


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

We got the 10kg allowance too to Cyprus. 

Ju not eaten them yet


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## hakunamatata

ohhhh mini homemade cake. i miss cake, is my favourite. will be one of the requests to bring into hospital when i see the back on this diabetis. all worth it for our little girl tho. have appointment and scan (to check weight gain) on tues and diabetic appointment and consultant, will find out if theyll put me on insulin as metformin struggling to keep up with highs and too many highs near end not good for hypoglyceamia (check spelling lol) in bubba at birth. getting through ironing, doing family washing today. feeling quite a lot of discomfort down in lower tum since last night. wondering if shes starting to engage?

hope everyone is well and having a lovely sunday.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I remember doing all the washing and ironing before the birth. I took pictures of the washing on the line    It looked so sweet! 

Its a wonder i'm not diabetic with all the sh!t i've consumed over xmas!    

Not long now for you! This is the time where it    d  r  a  g  s


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## carrie lou

Could well be engaging Hak, Zac engaged about 36 weeks, I know cos I couldn't walk properly after that  I felt it all in my hips. You poor thing, the diabetes can't be much fun. I practically lived on cakes and chocolate when pregnant, funnily enough it was one of the few things that kept the nausea at bay for me  Never mind, you will have to make up for it after bubs is born!   Good luck for your appointments this week honey


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## hakunamatata

only for a short while carrie as i need to get in shape for the christening xx


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## northernmonkey

Speeder - I can't believe that the inlaws situation has escalated to this!!  Good for you spelling it out to her though, I do hope they can calm down and see sense.  Fancy her letting your poor little girl down like that too, that's so mean.  Hope your dd settles down with baby soon, it can be so hard in the early days.  We had plenty of episodes where dd #1 did something to her baby sister when our backs were turned (we were never sure what, but would be met with a very guilty look from the eldest when we tried to find out what exactly had happened   ) and to be honest I think some of them were her simply trying to find out what will baby do if I do this.... (ie pinch, bite etc) I don't think it's all out of jealousy, and it doesn't last long.   
Fizzy - we've got a 3 year age gap between our two and I find it a bit difficult now that they are coming up to 2 and 5.  Playtimes are always a bit fraught because the youngest is forever trying to snatch toys off big sister, or the eldest wants to play something like snakes and ladders and the little one keeps moving the markers off the board!  Or we go to the park and dd#1 wants me to play with her but I have to keep lifting the little one on and off things....  I do feel very guilty that the older one is missing out on my time, so much so that I've decided that I'm going to start giving her some one to one time a few times a week and dh can play with the little one. The point is, I feel that whatever the age gap, at different stages one child will demand more of your time so you should just go for it when you feel the time is right.  (you also don't know how long it will take to conceive either - I expected first time success again second time round but in all it took us 9 months including cancelled cycles.)
Juju - I hate it when dd sleeps late too - I complain that she wakes up too early but worry when she doesn't!!
Pinkcat - you and your sister sound like me and mine - 5 year gap and only became friends when she got through her teenage angst!  
Ceci - food, food and more food for the plane. and some books if he likes you reading to him.  Although I have to admit those tips have only been tried and tested on a 4 hour flight   
Carrie lou - have you asked whether you can buy extra luggage allowance?  You can with lots of airlines.


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## amandaloo

Carrie- I'm really sorry to read your post how can grandparents be like that it's awful  . I hope your ok it must be hard for you and dh  . I feel a bit useless as really don't know how to advise other than keep strong you have been through a lot worse and nobody should spoil your special time with DS   

Speeder - bloomin eck that's just childish behaviour and I hope they come to their senses . Can't believe that mil let you down like that too  . How's your hubby dealing with it ?

Hak - I'm counting down your days left  

Hello everyone  

Afm- lost 5 lb in a week and two days done the ww pro points so very pleased with myself . DS is doing fine going to baby clinic tomorrow see how much he weighs x


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## northernmonkey

well done amanda, what a great start for you! Hope you get on ok with ds today.


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## northernmonkey

Juju - I meant to ask where are you going in Italy?  I really fancy Italy for our hol this year, dh wants to go to Greece.  I do love Greece but haven't been since before we had the girls and if we went there it would have to be earlier or later in the year as it gets so hot so not really great for the kiddies.


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## juju81

Well done on the weight loss Amanda...pro points is really good. I must get back on it.

NM, we're going to the Venetian Riviera, a eurocamp holiday. Campsite is called Ca Savio. We're in a superior caravan. I can't begin to tell u how excited I am. We did a lovely hotel last year in gran canaria but it was stressful to say the least so we thought we'd go self catering for a few years. I love caravan holidays and holidays abroad so thought a eurocamp was the perfect combination! Check it out (am going on personal recommendation too) there is sooooooooo much for the kids.....not to mention a litre of wine for 2euro


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## Spaykay

Diets? I just ate 4 chocolate mousses. Oops!

Kay xxx


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## carrie lou

Diet? What's that?  

(Well done Amanda, that's fab   )


----------



## ceci.bee

congrats amanda that is brilliant - v impressed what is your secret?? I am still BF so am not dieting (that's my excuse  ) so am trying to find other ways to loose weight - currently cycling to work 3 days per week as no time to exercise before/after work 

NM thanks for the tips re flying - will defo take food and books that's a really good idea - and the aplogetic look of all parents in economy with a baby 

AFM have put some pictures of our AFrican Christmas on the blog if you guys are interested
www.gavemandjoshi.blogspot.com

lots of love
Ceci 

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh Cecil, it all looks so lovely! In the picture on the door bouncer I think that J looks v tall - gonna take after his mummy there I reckon!


----------



## northernmonkey

Ceci - just took a look at your blog, it's the first time I've seen it and am very jealous - it looks beautiful there.  Joshi is very cute and looks so contented.  I didn't realise you and your dh were doctors - must be very hard work but very rewarding, especially where you are.  
Juju - sounds familiar!  We went to Majorca all inclusive last year and in hindsight it wasn't the best decision for loads of reasons.  This year I want somewhere where the girls have their own rooms so they can sleep as long as they need to, where we can eat at times to suit us and where it's not lights out at 10.30pm - yes the hotel switched all the balcony lights out at that time so we had to go to bed then because of course we couldn't sit in the lounge with dd being asleep in there!!  The girls also ended up with stomach bugs, as did loads of other guests in the hotel so that put me off eating in the hotel. I'll take a look at the eurocamps, that sounds great.


----------



## carrie lou

Ceci the photos are lovely, Joshi is looking so big! And BBQ for Christmas lunch must be so very different from the usual turkey!


----------



## speeder

Ceci - I always love looking at your blog! It looks amazing and your very cute little boy has become very big   

Amanda - I am so impressed. I have 1.5 stone to lose and my diet is OK but I am addicted to cake!  Particularly the Mr Kipling mini battenburg cakes with a hot up of tea after lunch - yum.  I could eat about 10 a day!  

Thanks girls for the sympathies re the in-laws.  I won't bore you with the extremely tedious meeting we had with them on Sunday but needless to say I felt like DH and I were the grown ups and they were a pair of toddlers.  Father in law accused us of trying to eliminate all risk from DD's life (no really, I just want to move sharp knives, glass vases and your medicines). It was DH and I that calmed them down.  They are going to consider what we have said and I've left a baby book with suggestions for toddler proofing.  I honestly felt like telling them to get stuffed to be honest but DH and DD have too much to lose.  My mum is furious with them and I've had to persuade her not to phone them up and have a fight! 

Carrie - I take my hat off to you for coping with your in-law problems for so long.  What a difficult situation to deal    What the heck is wrong with people?!

Hak - sounds like things are moving along!  Hope the appointments went well.  Start choosing your postnatal cake now!  (Want any recommendations?!  I could taste test for you in the next few weeks)

Fizzy - how are you feeling about sleeping positions now?  I meant to say that I have the Angelcare baby monitor and really like it.  It beeps if the baby stops breathing (and gives me a heart attack) and it means I sleep better at night!  It really helped with DD1 who had a little heart issue...(all fine now).


NM - I know exactly what you mean about your back being turned and something happening!  Glad to hear it stops soon!  This morning DD took off her pyjamas, lay on her little sister's changing mat and wee'd everywhere!  I am sure a child psychologist would have something to say about that.  

Juju - what a fab sounding holiday.  Self catering is definitely the way to go.  Does anyone know if Portugal will be way too hot in mid-May?  Our friend has a house there and has offered it to us....

Holly - can I pls ask your professional advice?  Sorry it's so boring but...  Basically I took all those antibiotics when DD2 was born - & aweek or so later had awful stomach pain and upset stomach etc and then felt rubbish for a while. I am feeling loads better now - energy back, look better, tummy pain gone but I'm left with residual IBS symptoms.  GP - who I like - thinks it's IBS but I've never had IBS in my life before.  She's going to test me for some infections but I wondered about a mild case of C-diff as I was in a rather unclean ward for 3 days. I feel like such a hypocondriac as everyone just says "oh you've just had a baby" but it's really hacking me off that my tummy isn't right and I don't feel it'd directly connected to the birth...


Well it's a shonking day up here today - more snow on the way apparently.  It's just me and DD2 (who is 6 weeks on Thursday - where does time go!) and we're having a nice day indoors x


----------



## ceci.bee

speeder C.diff diarrhoea is usually green and has a distinctive smell and usually has some mucus with it. you can ask your GP to send a sample off for a test as you defo don't want to give your DD diarrhoea. The more likely explaination is you have become slightly dairy intolerant after the D&V in hospital - it is really common, you can test yourself by eradicating dairy for a few days from your diet (even milk in tea) and see if it helps. Also lay off chilli/spicy food, caffiene, alcohol and pain killers like ibuprofen that can make it worse. You can get slight IBS post an infection and if your C.diff test is negative and you don't respond to the diet above then you may be left with that as a diagnosis. It is a pain but will resolve with time. good luck and sorry you are still suffering       

Thanks guys for your comments re the blog - it has now rained here for 4 days in a row so not so sunny now! I think he is cute but I know I am biased!   

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## northernmonkey

Speeder - while I remember, one thing that really helped us with jealousy issues when dd2 got a little older was to make her 'apologise' to big sis if she hurt her in any way.  For example if baby was lying on the floor and grabbed a handful of dd1's hair when she leaned over to give baby a cuddle.  The baby signing action for 'sorry' is to move your clenched fist round your chest once in a circular movement.  So we would tell baby to say sorry to her sister then get hold of her hand and do the action for her.  DD1 absolutely loved it and I think she really felt as though there was some fairness in the world.    DD2 still makes the signing action now when she says sorry which is so cute. Sorry to hear you're still not 100%, hope you're feeling better soon.  Oh and good for you handling the inlaws so well on Sunday - I can't begin to imagine how badly I would have reacted to them...


----------



## juju81

Speeder, mid may will be fine. I suffer IbS. I didn't realise u were having tummy probs, sorry I must have missed that!  

Ceci, are u both practicing GP's? When are u due back in London?


****, Noah just caught his fingers....


----------



## hakunamatata

hope noah is ok juju?

nm love your dd using sign. i noticed theres a baby sign class where we live, may check it out xx

speeder sounds like you were very restrained hun, good for you. and im a fan of coffee cake actually, or banana bread, yum, mouth is watering xx

hope all you girlies are ok. today went well but was eventful. due to diabetes medication and readings they want to induce me on the 6th of feb. not what i expected, i thought it was only if on insulin, but he stressed the reasons why it is best she come early. so im to call on the 6th and see if they have a bed. i am now up to 4 metformin. iccle one is now estimated to be 4 pounds 14 ounces, so she has put on about 13 ounces in 3 weeks, so she wont be a sumo girl when she comes out lol. hubby and i are a bit shell shockedand trying to get my head around stuff. all good tho, no bad news xx


----------



## carrie lou

Wow Hak, that is a lot to get your head around! But if they think she will be safer out than in, then I'm sure it's for the best. How many weeks will you be then? About 38? Apparently they put on about half a pound a week towards the end of pregnancy so she still has time to grow. Take care hun     

Speeder hun well done for handling the in-laws so well, hope they see sense soon    DH wants his parents to visit us end of Feb, not sure how I'll cope if they do come   but FIL will probably refuse again.


----------



## Spaykay

Can't keep up with you lot!!!

Speeder - I have the Angelcare monitor as I'd run out of gift ideas for DS. I now don't sleep in his room so it's reassuring knowing that the alarm wikll go if he stops breathing 

Ceci - from those photos it really looks like you're making the most of living abroad! My parents lived for years in Nigeria and although there was a civil war at the time, they really miss things such as the climate!!!

NM - I like that you got baby to say sorry. DS was crying to go to bed the other night when I had the 2 for bedtime on my own. As DD often asks for another story etc etc I told DS that he wasn't to cry and that it was bedtime and no he couldn't have another story!! Thought it might make DD think that I don't just go with DS to get him to sleep but that he also has to follow rules.

Kay xxxx


----------



## Fizzypop

oooh hak that is sooo exciting    Less than two weeks and you meet your little girl. 37 weeks is considered term so being induced at 38 weeks is fine. Is it basically because they are not able to control the diabetes?


And remember that those growth scans can be prone to inaccuracy x


----------



## Wraakgodin

Speeder, I am not sure how much Holly will be around this week, I am temporarily looking after this thread in her absence.  

Sue


----------



## northernmonkey

Hakuna - oh my goodness, not long to go!  Does the consultant want to see you again before the 6th? As the other ladies have said, you'll be full term so that's a bonus.  Take care, it sounds as though you and baby are being taken good care of so I hope you're able to relax a little and look forward to the big day.   
Holly - hope everything ok with you. 
Spaykay - I agree - it definitely seems to help if the eldest can see that their needs are being given priority rather than everything always having to stop for the baby.  And I guess it's never too early for the youngest to start learning that it's not all about them! 
Carrie lou - You poor thing, reading yours and Speeder's posts makes me realise what fab inlaws I have and that the things I moan about them for are really trivial.  Do you think your MIL will visit alone if FIL refuses?


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - sorry I was not around the other day. I was at Dad's. Yes antibiotic related upsets are common. It is best to have a stool sample to rule out the more serious c-diff type upset - the toxin lurks for ages in the stool, so if it is there it will likely be picked up with a test. You can get symptoms for 10 weeks after antibiotics finish and the diarrhoea can be mild to very severe.

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Clostridium-difficile/Pages/Symptoms.aspx

You can try avoiding dairy for a while but if you are breast feeding you will need to keep your calcium and vitamin D intake sufficient by alternative means. 
There are also ''friendly bacteria'' you can buy in the health food store to restore the balance of bugs in the tummy. (acidophilus capsules)

Hakuna - how exciting. Can't wait to hear your news!

/links


----------



## speeder

Thanks Holly - (hope your dad is doing OK?) & Ceci - really appreciate your views...  Am trying to cut out dairy which is fine when I'm at home but a bit difficult when I'm at a friend's house for lunch etc - I'm normally ravenous!  Someone else said to try to avoid wheat for a while and given I don't really like red meat and pulses and some veg give little one wind through the breast milk I began to wonder if I'd have to live off water and carrots...     

Carrie    does F-i-l rule the roose in his house at it were?  Would m-i-l want contact?  My m-i-l said virtually NOTHING when we "met" them to discuss the issues and said that her husband spoke for both of them.  Felt like I'd been transported back 200 years.  Having said that, m-i-l had moved some of the problem items which made me wonder if she did agree with us but couldn't tell her husband.  I wonder if our DHs wish we were similarly meek?!  Fat chance...

Really appreciate the suggestions to ease things with DD1 - especially the idea of DD2 saying "sorry" to DD1 - very clever!  The other day I overheard DD1 playing a game with her little cousin that they called "put the baby in the dustbin lorry" which involved bad things happening to their dolls so it's a bit perturbing!

Hak - hope you are doing fine in these last weeks - you must be beyond excited now to meet your little one. Enjoy the last few days of pregnancy.  It still baffles and amazes me that the little thing you feel kicking inside one day is in your arms the next.  

have a  lovely weekend everyone before the supposed big freeze.  There are little blackbirds nesting in our garden already and I feel like telling them not to bother, poor little things.


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## hakunamatata

morning nm, no the specialists dont want to see me any more before the big day. will see midwife on wed but thats all. psychiatric nurse is even trying to get me a side room, which would be nice. just been for a lovely 40 min walk with ruby and hubby. so nice now hip/back has eased. thanks widget for moving for mummy for some relief in the last couple of weeks. im very excited but i think im just apprehensive about the length of time induction can take and also the after affects of the diabetes on my precious girl. im remaining very relaxed which means im not thinking about it much. xx sorted nursing bras yest so doing well. mum was here this week and has now gone home as she has a pre op appointment next week, but will be heading back on the 6th should be get the go ahead that theres a bed. x 

speeder hubby has been betting we would get snow for widgets arrival as he usually has it on his birthday which is the 11th x

thinking of you all. xx BB hope the fet plans are going well? nm what stage are you at now, pg brain sorry lol?


----------



## juju81

Hak, please don't worry about the effects off the diabetes...my friend had to inject for the last 3 months because I gestational diabetes. Her little girl was absolutely fine xxx


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## hakunamatata

thanks ju, youre a star x


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## carrie lou

Hak try not to worry about the induction hun, I was nervous too after hearing bad stories but when I was induced I only needed one pessary (no drip) and Z was born less than 24 hours later. So it's not always horrible! I'm sure you will be fine, sounds like they're taking really good care of you.      

On the in-law issue - yes FIL is very much in charge. He's a complete control freak which is why we've had such issues, it's every time DH and I try to do something that's not "in his rule book" as he puts it, he has a tantrum about it. DH and I were the first people ever to stand up to him (DH was the first in his family to marry a non-Catholic) so it's been very difficult really ever since we got married (10 years ago now). MIL will still come and see Zac even if FIL refuses. She's head over heels with him to the point of being interfering and overbearing. After spending my entire pregnancy in a state of denial. She never asked anything about the baby, never showed any interest, I was really upset thinking it was because of the donor issue and she would never love our child. Then after putting us through that hell, at about 35 weeks then she suddenly decided she had to get involved and start telling us what to do for our own baby. Sorry I'm going on again, it's just that I've had a decade of their [email protected] and I'm fed up.  

Just got back from swimming with Zac. he loved it. He's always knackered afterwards though, going to try and put my feet up for a bit while he's asleep


----------



## speeder

hak - I also found induction with my first just fine. I only needed one pressed too. hope you get snow for the big day - that would be memorable  

carrie - the only thing that tires dd1 enough to nap these days is swimming - it's a lifesaver for us on a saturday


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## hakunamatata

carrie and speeder thanks for the reassurance. you hear so many horror stories dont you x  so sorry youre having hell with the in laws carrie, they should appreciate how wonderful you are. 
as long as i could get to the hospital speeder yes snow would be magical xx


----------



## northernmonkey

Hak - how are you doing?  Not long to go now, you must be sooooo excited.  I'm in middle of first tx but it's not going so well    My day 2 scan showed quite a few follicles so the dr decided to half the dose of meds he'd originally prescribed, then day 8 showed quite a few biggish follies so they halved the meds again.  I went back on Monday and nothing had really progressed over the weekend - only 1 follie was still a decent size but hadn't grown over the weekend and my lining wasn't any thicker so I'm back tomorrow for another scan.  I know we have to trust the drs, but I thought they would have increased my meds yesterday to try to get things back on track but they've left it as it is.  Fingers crossed my faith is redeemed in them again tomorrow    
Ju - I've replied to you on the other thread too  but towards end of last year 2 vials cost £305 from Bridge.


----------



## hakunamatata

nm sorry things are taking a strange turn, i hope tomorrow shows something more  positive  and that one is shining out. why is it ever straight forward hey.

im good thanks having a very lazy day today. after all my nesting i feel quite tired. will head off to bed for a nap soon. trying to contain my nerves about next week esp as theres no knowing for sure thy'll have a bed monday xx


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## northernmonkey

thanks Hak.  Make the most of your lazy day - they'll soon be a thing of the past but you wouldn't want it any other way.


----------



## amandaloo

hello ladies

Hak- hope youve had a nice lazy day   love your bump pic on ** looks like your all organised in the nursery too. If you can get a side room Id def get one. I had to spend all my time in hospital on a bay full of ppl and was in 5 days altogether including prelabour ward too. It was very tiring as had ppl going into labour on the prelabour ward and then babies keeping you up on the post labour ward. Can you credit it when I self discharged they offered to give me a side room to see if id change my mind typical! they should have asked me earlier, so yeah get yourself a side room  

Speeder- wow 10 mr kiplings a day    thats funny. How you doing? Hope your feeling better?

Ceci- Sorry long time since you asked me this but no secret really just being good dieting and not cheating. Weight watchers propoints diet is pretty good. Must have a look at your blog and catch up  

Mistletoeholly- Hope your ok and your dad is ok  

Northernmonkey-    your scan is better tomorrow         

Juju- Your dh's finger looks a mess (on **) ouch  

Carrielou- How are you?

Spaykay,and Fizzypop, Pheobs and anyone else ive missed hope your all well  

AFM- dont know much really, took Noah to be weighed hes now 20.6 pound another big one  . For some reason hes been waking in the night for past few nights not sure whats happening hope its short lived   Right tea time best be off x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I discharged myself and they weren't happy. I said I'd stay if they gave me a room. They laughed...... So I left.   best thing I ever did!!! I will do it again too!


----------



## carrie lou

DH discharged himself after his accident  I really wasn't pleased about it because I had a 4 week old baby at the time and couldn't cope with nursing him too! After sleeping on it, he went back to A&E the next morning


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I left hospital at 930pm!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Had scan yesterday. Placenta had moved up so no planned  c section


----------



## amandaloo

Mightym- I don't blame you I was tempted to go in the middle of the night   but thought I'd hang on till the morn . I didn't even wait for my meds as they were going to be a few hrs  I sent my hubby back for them ! Great news about your placenta bet you are very relieved x


----------



## carrie lou

Great news Mini


----------



## speeder

i stayed as long as poss as I knew I would get more rest in hosp even though it was a busy ward  . but the loo was filthy and I think that is how I picked up the bug  

mini - fab news, well done placenta for moving up - what a relief  

nm - hope you get good news at scan x


----------



## Spaykay

Won't tell u that in Spain u het your own room with en-suite and sofa for the other half!!!

MM - great news on placenta!

Kay xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

Mini that is fabulous news congratulations!
xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

wow mini thats fantastic hun.

ceci loving the new pic

well saw midwife this am and iccle ones head is fully engaged, yippee. all bodes well for monday. my bp was higher today so theyre coming out tomorrow to re test. maybe i ought to collect all my piles together tonight and pack my bag lol.


----------



## northernmonkey

Mini - great news about your placenta, you must be so relieved.  
Hak - Yes pack that bag then get your feet up!! 
Good news at my scan today.  Things are moving again thank goodness - only one follie of 15mm but that suits me because I think I'd have a nervous breakdown with twins    Back on Friday, trigger will probably be over weekend for iui Monday or Tuesday.  I'm so excited!!!!


----------



## hakunamatata

yeah nm. my one follie was 16.5 and waiting to be born xx feet up watching holby munching clementine for snack xx


----------



## northernmonkey

Good girl!  Make sure you stay there   I'm so excited for you!  
Anyone watching this series of One Born Every Minute by the way??  I love it!!!  If I wasn't broody before that started again I would be now    I just spend the whole hour that it's on blubbing.


----------



## hakunamatata

yep im crazy enough to be watching it, and dh lol. last week was fabulous, such a lovely story


----------



## northernmonkey

did you see the one with the barbie lookalike?  What a woman!!  I took one look at her and thought she was going to be a total drama queen but how hard was she??!!  But I've noticed the ones with the best labours are always in an all fours position or leaning forward like she was.  I don't understand why the midwives don't discourage them from lying on their backs especially when everything you read tells you that's the least helpful position.


----------



## hakunamatata

i totally agree hun. its a shame i will be rigged up to the heart monitor once established so could be limitting. x but hey go with the flow. looking forward to tonights. 
well off for a nap now x


----------



## northernmonkey

have a good nap, I'm off on the school run now to pick up my 4 going on 14 year old - standard answer to 'what did you do at school today?' is 'can't remember.'


----------



## carrie lou

Hakuna - ooh not long now hun, so exciting! This time next week.... Hope you enjoyed your nap, the only way I can get a nap now is with a little boy cuddled up with me but I wouldn't have it any other way!  I had to be on the monitor during my labour as well, because Zac was in distress, and you're right it is a bit more difficult to move around but if I was careful I could still sit on the bouncy ball which was quite comfy. Then I started feeling sick and asked to lie down  Anyway hopefully they will help you to change position when you want to.  

NM - I don't watch OBEM, think it's all still a bit raw for me  but that's not to say I'm not broody cos I am!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yes I am broody too. Not sure I could cope with or afford 2 without any support, and a dad who is in decline. but in a way I don't want Charley to be alone if there is a choice, and if I leave it much longer I will be too old to try.     

Hak - you mean to say you haven't packed yet   I remember the little outfits and chosing the one he would wear in theatre. Oh I'm all gooey just remembering.

I decided to leave hospital on the Saturday, still with feeding problems. It was so uncomfortable and hot and my DH was suggesting the feeding would be better at home when I was more comfortable. The midwives did not make it very clear that they did not think I should leave. I should have stayed perhaps. Perhaps Charley would not have got so ill if I'd stayed there and they had seen us. Maybe not? They were ignoring me up to the Saturday, so may be nothing would have changed.


----------



## juju81

NM glad things are moving again   for mon/tues. I wonder if they have had epidurals and that's why they are on their backs? Being on all 4's helped my contractions slightly too but when I got rigged up I opted for the epidural....fat lOt of goo that did tho!

Mini, fab news. I'm coming for a cuddle btw! Can't wait to see D'S and Noah interact again now their a bit older    

Hak, get that flipping bag packed woman. U might be taken in tomorrow!

Mistletoe, I DH still not very hands on?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

They'll probably kill each other  

Yeah I was on all 4s too until my lovely epidural!!


----------



## carrie lou

I went from the bouncy ball to lying down, then had epidural and didn't get up again until 12 hours later!  Exactly what they tell you not to do but I didn't care cos the epidural was amazing


----------



## juju81

Noahs gentle apparently     

Hak.....pack some tena lady


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah lots of them


----------



## Spaykay

My epidural was fab 1st time but DS came to quick...had my leg up on Dh's shoulder haha!


----------



## carrie lou

Don't think my DH would have coped with that Kay!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## hakunamatata

hey ju bag is now packed as had very bad head last night which wouldnt shift so hospital suggested i go in to be checked, thought i better take it with me just incase lol. all ok, all checks fine, bp not as high and bloods clear. was put on trace machine. hubby and i got to see inside of delivery room. all very very surreal.
midwife decided she didnt need to come this am. i had been sitting around keeping relaxed. had lay in today and breakfast in bed too as we weren't home till 11.30!! 
just been and done a bit more painting in the nursery, tho hard painting the turtles close to the ground with bump and head engaged. did a bit more tho lol.
well better get dh lunch ready he will be here in a bit.
thanks for advice ladies, but tena ladies....really


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yes really


----------



## carrie lou

Or maybe something a bit more heavy duty


----------



## juju81

Hak, glad ur bags doe and glad ur ok! And yes really. I'm not gonna lie, u may wet yourself! They don't warn u about that and when I did I wa so upset that it was gonna be like that forever. Midwife was lovely but I do think u should be warne about possibilities AFTER birth


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

They don't tell you your bowel is stretched either. But having a c section you might be ok.  When I wanted to go I HAD to go


----------



## amandaloo

Mini- loved my epidural too , owwww and don't remind me about the bowel problems   having forceps and stitched up to my behind didn't help matters either   all in a good cause though 

Hak- very excited for you And yes ju is right I still have to make sure I'm near a toilet now otherwise I just can't make it . I still wee sOmetimes when I sneeze . Must do more pelvic floor ! 

Carrie- thanks for the hugs on the other thread  didn't really want to reply on there as never sure if I might upset anyone  . Wasn't a nice experience at all really we thOught it was going to be a really nice day too . Anyway when I thought more about it last night I think the question they asked us both was " are you the natural mother / father " they didn't say genetic I got that bit wrong . Weird isn't it that the registra had never come across it before you would think someone would have said no before !

Nmonkey- yes did watch that episode of  obem was well impressed with her but they do say every woman has 
different birth pain maybe she was lucky ? 

Best be off soaps to watch ! 

Amanda x


----------



## juju81

Amanda they do say woman who had forceps tend to have worse bladder probs. think we nearly all had those wretched things on this thread lol! Luckily I healed really well, some people army as lucky are they!

Cupcake goes in mat leave tomorrow


----------



## carrie lou

Ah Cupcake! How exciting  

I had ventouse, not forceps. Found it OK actually, didn't feel a thing thanks to the epidural. Was sore for quite a while afterwards though  I too wet myself once, after we came home from hospital, DH thought there was something wrong with me  Fortunately just the once though  I've been OK since then, must be one of the lucky ones


----------



## *ALF*

I loved my epidural too...  

and there are some advantages of having a c-section....none of these bowel or bladder problems afterwards..............................

Hak - glad all was okay last night. Have a nice relaxing weekend and I hope your induction goes like the others on this thread and not like mine!!!

Back into hiding...........


----------



## JanaH

Hi everyone


I haven't been on for a very long time. I got back from six weeks holiday in South Africa about 2 weeks ago. We had a fab time with all the family and friends. Joseph loved all the sun and attention.


Hak not long until you have your bundle in your arms.


I must be lucky as I did not tear and no problems down below after birth. 


Have loads to read and to catch up on. 


AFU - OMW Joseph is a very active boy he started crawling when he was 5 months and has 6 theeth already. His pulling himself up against everything. Heard from work today, they will allow me to come back 3 days a week.    We are moving house this weekend just hope the snow will stay away until after the weekend. 


Have a good evening ladies


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Another one moving house soon with a little one - someone on another thread is doing the same - best of luck.  

I really think I had the easy option with a planned c-section. I was pretty incontinent pre-birth from about 30 weeks or so   Used to have to be very careful about not going too long and taking time over going to wee. Standing up after going was an issue. I think the baby was causing a bend because more would gush TMI LOL!

As soon as the baby was out no problems any more. 
My scar is a little sore sometimes - like when doing stomach exercises at aerobics, but other than that it was pretty quick and easy to go through.

You need industrial sized sanitary pads after the birth anyway, so I am sure you are covered for leaks in the bladder department.

A friend of mine who is a doctor said once that it is better to go through surgery (c-section) when young and no medical problems than having to go through womb prolapse surgery at 70 due to having 8lbs dragged through your pelvic floor. I think she has a point!


----------



## juju81

Good luck with the move. We moved when Noah was 4wks old. Don't think that helped me at the time in hindsight  

My bladder isn't too bad now unless I've ha a rottin cough for a while!

I just used thick sanitary towels, didn't bleed for that long really....can't of done as we did it after 3 wks! 

Exciting stuff having some babie due soon


----------



## carrie lou

Jana hope the move goes OK  

Holly I think there are good and bad things about both c-section and normal birth, and it probably depends on your experience! My mum had 2 normal deliveries and one section - the normal births pretty straightforward and she says she felt back to her normal self within a day or two. With the c-section she had a big haemorrhage and a thrombosis afterwards and took weeks to get over it. She says she would always choose a normal birth over a section. Whereas I know other people who've had a very difficult traumatic normal birth, then a straightforward easy elective c-section for the next baby, and of course they would prefer a c-section! Personally even though Z's birth didn't go according to plan, it really wasn't too bad and I'd have no hesitation in going for another normal birth next time round (if we're that lucky  )

Hakuna enjoy your last weekend without a baby (get lots of sleep!) So excited for you


----------



## ceci.bee

Holly - I know what your friend means - my mum had 4 easy births, the last being my bro at 10lbs and now has had years of bladder probs after her menopause and now has a pessary she has to wear every day to stop the leaks and prolapse (she didn't want surgery but might still need it). I really wanted a natural birth and almost felt cheated by the CS and it was hard at the begining to pick him up when I was so sore and it took about 6 weeks to stop hurting and is still numb- if we managed to get pg with number 2 then we will have to see what we go for if we get that lucky   

Ju    3 weeks gosh am amazed!!!!!!  

Hakuna so excited for you sweetie and can't wait to hear all about it - I watched loads of women coming in for inductions when I was sat on the maternity ward for a month waiting for my CS, and tell your DH that when you are on all fours making noises like a cow it is time to go to labour ward/delivery suite    good luck hun            

Janah - gosh he does sound really active - Joshi is 10 months nearly and not yet pulling himself up although now crawling and will walk when we hold hiim under the arms - so cute and adorable I sometimes can't get over how lucky we are to have him he is so sweet!

lots of love to all

Ceci


----------



## abcdefgh

Just want to say best of luck to Hakuna! So exciting that your little girl will be with you in just a few days  . Will be thinking of you. xx

AFM - 12 week scan is on Friday. So glad it's finally near as the last few weeks have dragged so much but I'm also getting increasingly nervous. Just hope all is ok. 

Hope everyone's well and having a nice weekend. xx


----------



## carrie lou

Best of luck Abcd  I'm sure it will all be fine and then you can start to enjoy it!


----------



## Fizzypop

Abc - you will find after the 12 week scan time flies by! Am sure everything will be fine x


Hak - not long now, sooo exciting    Have you got snow where you are? We have none yet but apparently it will be here overnight...kind of don't want it this yr cos will be a nightmare with DD and the dog!


Well, I have realised that I've spent the last 5 months wishing time away...starting to reduce the breast feeding now, think she has her bottom teeth coming through...when she was younger I was always thinking ahead to next stage and now shes starting to move away from being my bubba    Am definitely thinking of having one go when she's 9 months, 3 months before back to wor. Just want to try and lose some weight first!


----------



## Spaykay

Abcd - good luck with the scan...very exciting!

Hak - tick tock...coming soon YAY!

FizzyPop - awwwww, they do grow out of being babies, buit each stage is so special and it's lovely watching them blossom into little people with personalties

kay xxx


----------



## Spaykay

I'm going to buy some cone things to improve my pelvic floor muscles. You pop them in and the holding in of them improves your muscle. They slowly go up ion weight as you improve. Chinese balls (those sex ones) are also recommended...but I would fear the pleasure aspect in public places!!! I was/am so rubbish at diong my excersises!

Kay xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

you make me laugh kay xx

well girls im to go in at 2pm. will miss ya. back to chat soon, with a wee lassie xxx


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## carrie lou

Good luck Hakuna!!!!!      Can't wait to hear your news hun, so excited for you. I hope it all goes well


----------



## *ALF*

Just popping on to say;

GOOD LUCK HAKUNA!!!!hope all goes nice and smoothly for you and you will soon be cuudling your little girl.


----------



## hopingagain

Good luck hakuna how exciting xx


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## ceci.bee

good luck hakuna so exciting!!

xx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

good luck hak     

spay


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## Spaykay

OMG Hakuna...you're gonna be a mummy dentro de nada!!!! Sorry, that means in no time at all but it just sounds better in Spanish WOOHOOOO!

DD just had her first proper hair cut and was sooooo good! She's been for fringe trims etc since tiny, but today there were hair combs, pray and all the trimmings!!! She talked me through  the process 

Kay xxx

kay xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Hak- good luck hope everything goes smoothly for you


----------



## fayster

(just sneaking in to wish Hakuna good luck and check for news....off back to normal thread now)


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## abcdefgh

Aw, I'm so excited for Hakuna! Can't wait to hear news. xx

Spaykay - Do you live in Madrid? Or somewhere else in Spain? I lived in Madrid for three years until 2008. I'm really missing it at the moment   .


----------



## Spaykay

Abcde - yes I live in Madrid! Maybe I know u  How come u left?

Kay xxx


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## abcdefgh

We only intended to stay for a year and ended up being there for three so it just felt like it was time to move on really. I would absolutely love to go back but I don't think we'd be able to get jobs good enough to live the kind of lifestyle we'd want to with a family, especially since the cost of living is getting pretty high. But then sometimes I just think maybe we should just go for it and make it work somehow! I don't remember ever meeting a Kay (assume that's your real name?) but I bet we do know some people in common! Do you / did you ever teach English? xx


----------



## Spaykay

Kay isn't my real name? I teach in a British school

K x


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## northernmonkey

Hak - sorry I didn't get online yesterday, dd has a chest infection so was clamped on to me all day.  Hope everything went well for you yesterday, can't wait to hear that your little one has arrived safely.   
Hope everyone else is well, I'd better get back to the housework while dd has her nap so speak soon. 
x


----------



## carrie lou

We're off to Ireland tomorrow for a week's holiday (visiting DH's rellies) - was popping on for any news of Hakuna but I guess I'll have to wait  The suspense may kill me though!  Hakuna if you're reading, I hope it all went brilliantly and can't wait to hear your news    

See you all when I get back


----------



## Fizzypop

As of this morning baby hak was staying firmly put! Reckon too cold for her to come out 


Carrie - have a lovely time.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## carrie lou

Oh come on baby Hak!  Oh well, hopefully there'll be news by the time I get back!


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Too comfy!


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## sweetdreams73

Hello lovely ladies

Just wanted to update you as just had a text from the lovely Hakuna to say that _*she has a planned c-section booked for tomorrow as she has not progressed since Monday and had all the drugs and they cant break her waters.*_

Wish you all the very best sweetie and be thinking of you and DH and so cant wait to hear all about it and welcoming your little girl into the world lots of love and hugs sweetdreams xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

good luck hakuna sorry it hasnt gone as planned but hope all goes smmothly tommorow           

lots of love ceci xx


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## Spaykay

Awwww Haku - hope you¡re ok. All the best for tomorrow

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Ah Hakuna - sorry it's been such a long drawn out process but all the best for tomorrow  Your little girl will be safe in your arms in no time.  

Our flight was cancelled - we're back home  Booked on the same flight for tomorrow instead but heavy snow forecast for the early hours so who knows what might happen...


----------



## ceci.bee

Shame Carrie sorry to hear that - hope you get away soon 
xx


----------



## hopingagain

Thinking of you hak wont be long and your little.girl will.be here. 

Carrie I hope you get your flight fingers crossed xx


----------



## Fizzypop

Oh no hak, she doesn't want to come out. Can't believe even the drop didn't work, I thought that was guaranteed!

Carrie - fingers crossed for tomorrow. Didn't realise snow was coming :-(


----------



## amandaloo

Oh hak - hope all goes well for tommoz xx

Carrie- hope you get off ok and the snow keeps away fingers crossed x


----------



## Spaykay

Carrie - we'red fling into Heathro tomorrow...praying the snow won't be too thick!

Kay xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - planned section - definitely the way to go in my opinion - you will have your little girl in no time and I am sure all will be well in no time. Sorry they have messed about with you so much already this week. You must be fed up. All be over soon !


----------



## carrie lou

We're flying from Bristol - it was the airport staff who warned us about the snow but having checked the forecast, it's only for "light" snow in the early morning so hopefully we (and you Kay) should be fine!


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## northernmonkey

Hak - gosh, your daughter is displaying a stubborn streak already not playing ball    Bet you can't wait to finally meet her tomorrow, hope they put you at the top of the list and don't make you wait any longer!!  Good luck, can't wait to hear from you.   
Pinkcat - we're not too far from Wiltshire and the snow has just started - sorry to be the bearer of bad news but it's forecast to be heavy from midnight....  Hopefully the main roads will still be clear and you'll make your weekend ok. 
Spaykay - Are you looking forward to getting back to the uk?  Other than any travel disruption I guess it'd be lovely to see your daughter playing in the snow - has she actually seen snow before?
Carrie Lou - hope you manage to get your flight tomorrow,  will you be able to extend your trip at the other end?


----------



## northernmonkey

ps ABC - good luck for your scan tomorrow, hope you get some great piccies!


----------



## northernmonkey

ABC - good luck for your scan tomorrow, hope you get some fab piccies.


----------



## northernmonkey

ps ABC - good luck for your scan tomorrow. x


----------



## hopingagain

Can't wait to hear all about your scan abc, good luck xx


----------



## Spaykay

Oooo...scan news coming up YIPPE!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Good luck Abc, enjoy seeing your little bean   

Hakuna      

AFU - at the airport, flight is delayed by 2 hours


----------



## northernmonkey

I wasn't on the pop last night honestly! My post to abc wouldn't send or so I thought, hence 3 of them finally getting through eventually.


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## abcdefgh

Hey everyone,

Thanks for all your messages, especially the three from NM - felt very special!  

Scan today went well. Baby was very chilled out and well-behaved for the measurements but performed a few waves, kicks and turns for us before we left. It was lovely   . Nuchal measurement was 1.3 but I was told it's pretty meaningless alone and I need to wait for blood results - just hope I don't get a phonecall in the next few days and then I should be able to finally relax! 

Hakuna - Thinking of you. Hope all went well and you are now having cuddles with your little girl. x

Carrie - Hope you got off ok and have a great holiday! x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Well done abc


----------



## hopingagain

Glad all was well at your scan abc xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Wonderful news ABC! 
I think Charley's nuchal was 1.3 and his risk came back 1 in 7100, which for my age of 39 was very reassuring.


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks everyone


----------



## sweetdreams73

hello lovely ladies

Its with great pleasure that I am able to announce on behalf of the lovely _Hakuna_

_





















At 11.14 today by c-section Addison Maya Natasha was born weighing 6lb 1oz, both mummy and baby are doing really well.







_


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## sweetdreams73

Hakuna - huge huge congratulations to you and DH





















, love her names they are beautiful, wishing you all much happiness and joy as a wonderful family and cant wait to hear all about it and see photos of her. hope you recover quick







and are enjoying being a mummy you so deserve it! lots of love and hugs sweetdreams and the boys




























xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Congrats to Hak and DH


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Congratulations Hakuna - wonderful news - welcome to this wonderful world


----------



## *ALF*

Hakuna and DH

      ​​HUGE CONGRATULATIONS​​ON THE SAFE ARRIVAL OF​​YOUR DAUGHTER​​WELCOME TO THE WORLD LITTLE ONE​​      ​​​​


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## juju81

Yay. I've even dying to say something since I saw on ** this morning but didn't wanna step on anyone's toes lol

Congrats hak xxxxxx


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## carrie lou

Congratulations Hakuna and DH!     and welcome to the world baby Addison. I'm so so thrilled for you and hope you are enjoying every moment with your wonderful little girl    

Abc - so pleased for you that everything was OK at your scan  I remember the amazement of seeing my little Zac turning somersaults on the screen, such a special moment  Honestly can't remember what my nuchal measurement was but I'm sure you needn't worry about it  

AFU - finally arrived at our destination more than 24 hours late after a nightmare flight   but we're all in one piece and that's what matters


----------



## Fizzypop

Massive congrats to hakuna and abc xxxxxx


----------



## hopingagain

Congratulations hakuna and welcome to the world Addison xx


----------



## abcdefgh

Sorry for a me post but I am a bit worried as I've had a bit of brown bleeding / discharge. Not very much, it was only there when I wiped and it definitely looks like old blood, but I'm obviously still a wee bit concerned. I'm not sure whether to phone the EPU (presumably shut until morning) and take the day off work tomorrow to get checked out, or if maybe I'm overreacting and that would only be necessary if it gets worse. Any advice? x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

There probably isn't anything anyone can do, but you could phone them if you are concerned for reassurance or advice. It is best to take it easy and if you haven't got any cramps or red blood then it is probably something of nothing. Hope all stays well ABC.


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks Mistletoe. I phoned the EPU, not expecting to get an answer, but someone did pick up and she advised to go in. I think I'll go in the morning rather than this evening as, if I go now, she said they won't be able to scan me and will probably just ask me to come back tomorrow anyway. I haven't had any more brown stuff or bleeding so I'm hoping it's nothing to worry about but I think it's better to be safe than sorry so will follow their advice and get checked out. x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

abc - sometimes your body tries to have an AF so you get a bit of spotting/brown stuff. or could be cos baby is stretching everything. Go in the morning to ease your mind.


----------



## abcdefgh

Thanks Mini. I'm feeling much calmer now but will get checked out anyway. Will let you know how I get on tomorrow. xx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I had 2 spots of blood yesterday when i went to the loo.    I panicked but then realised i probably had scratched myself with my nail     theres been nothing since. Good job i was in work cos i would of gone to hospital if at home    It did feel a bit 'sore' down below afterwards!


----------



## northernmonkey

Hakuna and DH - fab news - congratulations to you both.        And what beautiful names.  Hope all is going well. 
ABC - Brown blood is definitely old blood but I'm sure you'll have your mind put at ease today.


----------



## abcdefgh

Just a quick post to say all is ok. I didn't have a scan but they listened to baby's heartbeat. Think bleed came from cervix - they say I'm probably more sensitive after having treatment for abnormal smear a couple of years ago. xx


----------



## *ALF*

Good news ABC


----------



## ceci.bee

Hakuna hun so pleased for you that is fab - congrats and love the names!!

ABC fab news your beanie is doing so well am chuffed for you

 
lots of love
Ceci


----------



## amandaloo

Hakuna- huge congratulations on the safe arrival of you baby girl   well done . Hope you recover well big hugs xxxx

Abc- glad all is well x


----------



## Spaykay

Abc - phew! What a worry ((()))

MN - I tgink I scratched a mozy bite on bun when pg and ended up in [email protected] for spotting! Was told spotting is nirmal anyhoo and alllll was fine x

Kay xxx


----------



## pinkcat

Congratulations Hakuna     

Good news abc    what a relief.


----------



## ceci.bee

Hi guys

I have just seen some pics of Addison on ** and she is gorgeous!!!!

I have also just posted some updated pics of Joshi on safari in malawi on our blog www.gavemandjoshi.blogspot.com

lots of love to all
Ceci 

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that fertilityfriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## Spaykay

Did I congratulate Haku? Hope so 

Kayxxx


----------



## sweetdreams73

Carrie - have a lovely holiday x  

Hakuna - loving pics of Addison on **... she is so beautiful, enjoy every precious moment as they grow so very quickly! welcome to motherhood its amazing isnt it, hope your recovering from your C-section lots of    

ABC - so glad everything is all ok and bumps doing good, what a relief must of been very scary... x  

ceci - loving your blog, joshi is getting so big now, he is adorable.x   

mini - scary!! glad all ok x  

lots of love and     to everyone else xx

AFM - Boys are doing really well, matthew is now 14lb 4ozs (born at 3lb 6ozs)  and daniel now 12lb 14ozs (born at 2lb 13ozs),  cant quite believe how they have grown and that they are now just 6 months old and about to start weaning!! that will be fun!!     time has flown by, life is pretty manic and hectic looking after two cheeky boys mainly by myself as DH works a lot and I sadly dont have a mum or motherinlaw to help out as both dead but its also amazing and very rewarding being blessed with two beautiful adorable boys and I wouldnt change a thing, only sad thing is dont get much time to be able to post on FF anymore. The last couple of months have been rather difficult though as the boys have been quite poorly off and on as they keep getting bronchitis and keep getting flu and cold viruses and have had to go to hospital on two occasions and stay over night for monitoring, joys of premature twins unfortunately they cant fight of germs and get things much worse because of their immature lungs etc..Anyway hoping that as they get older and bigger their health will get much better. They are such sweet boys we are very lucky indeed!

lots of love sweetdreams and the boys xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Morning everyone  

SD - sorry your boys have been ill, it's been a bad time of year for bugs - we have been very lucky to get away with only a few sniffles! Hope they are both well now and good luck with the weaning  

Ceci - lovely photos as always, especially love the ones of Joshi and his little mates   

Hakuna - hope all is going well and you're recovering from the c-section  

Mini - 34 weeks already?! Where has the time gone   

Abc - sorry to read about your scare but so pleased all is well with your bean  

Love to everyone else, hope you are all well  

AFU - just returned from a week's holiday in Ireland where Z met DH's relatives for the first time including DH's gran who is his only living great grandparent  Of course the first thing they all wanted to discuss is who Z takes after (none of them know about out fertility tx) and they all seemed convinced he looks like DH - which was a little awkward at first but I decided just to let them think what they wanted to! Z has finally cut his first 2 teeth with surprisingly little fuss. I've had a couple of nips while BFing him (painful  ) but I tell him "no" when he does it and he seems to have got the idea!

I have a quick question for you ladies with older babies ... at what age did your little ones start crawling? Because Z will be 9 months in a few days time (  ) and still is reluctant to crawl. It's worrying me a little because I know a few babies younger than him who are already crawling well. He does wriggle around on his belly and can get up on hands and knees and rock but hasn't yet managed to put one hand and knee in front of the other. He seems much more keen to skip straight to walking! He is pulling up and cruising around furniture but I don't want him to skip crawling completely because I've read that it's important for brain development?  The problem seems to be that he doesn't really enjoy "tummy time" so his opportunities for crawling practice are a little limited. After a few minutes on his tummy he gets really frustrated and cries to be put upright again. My latest trick is to put him on his tummy then crawl around in front of him to show him how it's done  He looks at me in complete bewilderment as if to say, mummy what on earth are you doing?  But at least it gets him to spend some time on his tummy and I reckon if he learnt to wave and clap by copying me, perhaps he can learn to crawl in the same way


----------



## olivia m

Hi Carrie Lou
None of our three children crawled.  All went from bum-shuffling to pulling themselves up on furniture...all walked before a year.  At 40, 28 and 25 I would say their brain development was pretty OK.
Babies do their own thing, whatever the books say.
Olivia


----------



## Fizzypop

Carrie - I've read tons of stuff that say some babies never crawl, they go straight to walking. My friend last night told me her son crawled at about 9 months, but they do all develop at different rates. My friend didn't walk till 18 months! He will get there hun xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

carrie - can't quite remember when DS crawled, think he was around 8-9 months BUT lots of my friends babies never crawled. One friend, her son crawled and her daughter didn't, she bum shuffled and is as bright as a button, in fact shes really advanced for her age.  so i shouldn't worry. If hes wriggling on his tum then thats a good sign he might crawl, especially with the rocking.

SD - Sorry to hear the boys have been ill., nothing like having an ill baby, especially 2 

DS went into his new bedroom last night, he was so excited when he saw his cot in there!  He went straight to sleep, no messing around! 

We I am now trying to sort out the babys room.  I hope he doesn't come early!  On time would be nice, not late or early please!!


----------



## juju81

Carrieann, don't get hung up by what tw books say. The talk drivel   if he's rocking I'd sy he's almost there to actually crawling! Noah was about 8months  I think, which is about average but didn't walk until he was 16months. They will only do it when they want to. My nieces were 20 and 22 months when yet walked. Tw eldest walked on her knees the and youngest bum shuffled. Try not To worry.


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks everyone (especially Olivia  ) I'm sure you're right that it doesn't _really_ matter when or even if they crawl. It's just that people (well, my mum  ) keep telling me he HAS to crawl before he can walk otherwise he'll have problems with reading and writing later on (apparently  ) and as a first time mum it's hard to know how important this is. But I'm sure there must be plenty of people who never crawled and learnt to read and write just fine, and equally others who did crawl and struggled with literacy. It seems there's so much to stress about when you have a baby. If we're lucky enough to have a second, I'll probably be much more relaxed about everything   Anyway we've seen some promising signs today that crawling might not be far off so watch this space...


----------



## *ALF*

Carrie - as all the others have said he will get there in his own time and in his own way! As for problems writing and reading if he doesn't crawl before walking ..... My DD started reading at 3.5yrs and guess what she did first, yes walk!!!! (she did crawl but only ever to get somewhere she could pull herself up to walk). If he's rocking on his knees he is very close. I know it's hard not to compare but try not to worry he sounds as though he's doing fine!!


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie - I think Z and Joshi are so similar its scary! at Z's age Joshi was doing exactly the same things and I was also worrying about him not crawling -and now I can't stop him going everywhere - he went from a bit of tummy slithering one day to crawling the next - and he hardly pulls himself up at all - its all so individual. My book "what to expect in the first year" is really helpful about milestones, and is v reassuring about babies skipping crawling - I don't think it has anything to do with development at all, and thinking about brain development I can\t work out the logic of what your mum is saying anyway. The best bit of advice I have ever been given is 'trust your instincts' which so far has stood me well!

lots of lvoe to all
Ceci


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks Alf and Ceci  After all that worrying, I think he's about to do it ... today he has actually managed to move forward on hands and knees though it's more like shuffling than proper crawling - but I really think it's a matter of days now!   

Ceci - my mum has been chatting to an occupational therapist friend who says 80% of children who are referred with reading/writing problems were non-crawlers. Things like getting their numbers and letters back to front. But a) my sister crawled early and had terrible trouble with getting letters back to front! and b) what percentage of children who have no problems with literacy were non-crawlers? She doesn't know. A little knowledge (in my mum's case  ) can be a dangerous thing.


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie-   I bet he's crawling tomorrow . I worried about DS not rolling and then all of a sudden he was an expert . I've never heard of non crawlers having writing problems ...  . I'm currently worried about him being able to sit unaided he can do it for about 50 secs Max and I'm Wondering how long he should be able to do it for . Think we all worry but think they will do it when ready eh  

Hi to everyone 

Amanda x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I was worried DS was slow to talk but now he shouts 'mummy mummy mummy' all around the supermarket


----------



## Spaykay

Carrie Lou - EG was 10 months when she crawled and walked at 13 months. Some are much later though...enjoy the fact you find him where you last put him down at the moment! I am soooooo not helping DS to roll!!! He's npt even close and doesn't lift head when on tummy...as I never put him on his tummy!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Kay - those days are gone already!  This morning I put him down with some toys while I did some cleaning, turned my back for 5 seconds and the next thing I knew he had the Windolene bottle in his hands!  Wake up call!  

Amanda - Z also started out sitting for only short periods unaided, I just kept propping him up and gradually he could manage it for longer and longer until he was totally steady. He'll get there


----------



## Fizzypop

Kay - funny you say that, my friend said that with her first they encouraged every stage of development then for the second they wanted to delay everything for as long as possible!!!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie - DS did camando crawling first. One day he was in the lounge when i was in the kitchen, I had the patio doors open but thought he'd be ok and no way could get down the steps. Hmmmmmm! I went in cos it was queit and couldn't find him, I then spotted him half way down the patio chasing the cat    God knows how he got down the step but he managed to work it out    DH went mad at me, but you just dont know when they are going to move on and surprise you! Anyway, i told DH where to go!


----------



## juju81

Noah wouldn't sit! I kid u not be was probably over 18months before he would sit on his bum! He just cried but if we put him down on his knees he was fine


----------



## Rachfins

Hi Ladies,

Can I join you on here please? I had my 12 week scan today and all is well. It was fantastic to see the little one. Measured as 13 weeks today and my EDD is 28/08/12. Nuchal scan was low risk, just got to wait for blood results to come back. Still got to see consultant at 20 weeks to check if fibroid has grown. If it does I will have to have more scans. I'm in a happy place at the moment.  

Rach x


----------



## abcdefgh

Hey Rach - nice to see you on here   xx

Just wondering if anyone has heard from Pheobs recently. Was just thinking of her and realised I haven't seen any posts from her for a while. Hope she's ok. xx


----------



## carrie lou

Welcome Rach  Great news on your scan, you must be thrilled!  


I was also thinking about Pheobs recently ... anyone know how she's doing?  


We have more hands-and-knees shuffling here today, he's trying sooo hard bless him! Sometimes his arms can't keep up with his legs so he flops down on his tummy and this makes him very cross.  


Mini    It's so difficult to watch them every second isn't it, and still do all the cooking/cleaning/ironing - I don't think men really get that!  I honestly didn't think Z could reach the windolene but as soon as my back was turned he got straight on his tummy and pulled himself towards it  He can move alarmingly fast when he's really determined. Will have to start being a bit more careful!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

carrie - just warning you that for a while any cleaning will be thrown out of the equation. It does get better but it shocked me when i couldn't do a thing once he was awake


----------



## carrie lou

oh well at least i will have an excuse


----------



## Spaykay

CL- good lad! He obviously read ur post and wanted to show ur mum not to worry!

Kay xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Aya I haven't heard from Phoebs for about 2 weeks I pm'd the other day so may get a reply when she logs in . Last time I heard from her  she was fine but tired x


----------



## hakunamatata

Evening ladies, many thanks for all the congrats. It still feels oh so ery surreal. Sorry ive not checked in earlier I didnt pick my laptop up for a good while and I cant post on ff from my phone, but ** I can which is why thats been updated. xx
Addison is absolutely wonderful. she is 6 pounds 9 already and has stolen mine and dh's heart. she's welcome to anything because she truely is the best gift.

c section is healing well but was really frustrating to begin with, just not being able to do anything. tho it did mean dh got some special time with her and he really has proven to be the bestest dad, its so nice to see.

i am combination feeding breast and bottle which is going ok, tho at times she can be confused. I am very glamorous with my leaky breast lol and expressing like a jersey cow. I miss my perfume and feeling sexy, but im sure this will return... right?

abc glad your scan went well and the bleeding was ok. mini sorry you frightened yourself too xx
phoebs if youre reading i hope youre ok
sd it sounds like the boys are doing fabulous and youre truely amazing xx
missed you girls xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hak - Nice to see you hun    Re: the sexyness, Hmm yeah it comes back..................eventually!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - it is just important to attempt to freshen up and get dressed at ''some point'' in the day at this stage. Don't worry about glamour. It was an achievement for me if I was showered and dressed before late afternoon in the early days. One day I got dressed at 8pm   

It does get better and you find you get used to it all. I have managed to put on makeup about 10 times since I had Charley and tonight I wore perfume. I still need to do a serious diet to feel in the least bit glamourous. I really should get on top of it before I return to work.


----------



## Rachfins

Hakunamata - Lovely to hea from you. Realkl glad everything is going well with Addison.

Rach x


----------



## juju81

Hak it's nice to see u back in here. I can only imagine combi feeding is time consuming but once ur in a routine ur'll get back some sort of normality. I showered in te evenings when nick was back from work and after his morning feed I used to sort myself out. I got into a quick routin and most day I was at my sisters ready to go on the school run with her. Although looking back I think it's because I wa anxious being on my own with him  

She's a little blonde beauty


----------



## carrie lou

Aaah just lost a post!  Hate it when that happens.

Hakuna lovely to hear things are going well. Mm does sexiness come back? I'll let you know    Don't worry about it, I had days when I didn't get out of my nightie and make up still only goes on once or twice a week  It does get easier though. Like Juju, I have a shower in the evenings after Z's in bed and if he wakes, DH can see to him for a bit. Lots of love to you and DH and Addison    


Z has his eye appointment tomorrow to see about his squint


----------



## teresal

Hi everyone
sorry never seem to get time to post nowadays, i do read when i can but madam keeps me busy, the terrible twos have started so lots of tantrums for us    is funny but can't let her see that

am meeting up with margesimpson and ds tomorrow so looking forward to seeing her bump, just hope she doesn't go into early labour since she only has two weeks left , could be interesting

sexiness coming back mmmmm still waiting for that one, never seem to get a minute just for me anymore, with meredith, my dad, work and all the usual mundane stuff i seem to have forgotten about me, sure i will eventually get that back, maybe when meredith leaves home hahaha, still wouldn't change her for the world.

we are just back from a few days away and really enjoyed the time as a threesome and not worrying about being home for certain times for my dad, we have said we must do it more often for meredith's sake

anyway better run can hear some kitchen drawers being upturned, enjoy your babies ladies cos when they get to this stage wow you can't turn away from them for a minute 

xxxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Hak - lovely to hear from you. I'm still waiting for sexiness to return too  went to our first party the other week and I was so busy getting DD ready and packing all the just-in-case bags that I nearly went in my trackie bottoms. Oops! At least it was a house party...As for showering, i found she was quite happy to sit in bouncy chair in bathroom and watch, but now she is a bit bigger im trying to leave her in cot and play. Not working so far as she always wants to be with someone, but we'll get there. But seriously, don't worry about it at the moment just enjoy that little bundle of joy xxxxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Like Ju I showered in evening and got dressed after his 7am bottle, i didn;t go downstairs until i was dressed. I even put my make up on!    I got him dressed too. 

This helped me feel a bit more with it!!


----------



## hakunamatata

thanks girls you always know how to make me feel better xx


----------



## amandaloo

Hak - hello hope you are ok nice to see your piccies on **  . I found that I didn't want any sexy time while I was bfeeding couldn't really get my head round leaky nipples and feeling sexy lol ! I used to and still do put DS in his Moses basket / cot and leave him in there while I have a shower in morn sometimes put his bouncy chair near bathroom door too x


----------



## amandaloo

Carrie- hope Z's appt goes ok x

Teresa- lovely to hear from you x


----------



## ceci.bee

hakuna lovely to see you back and really don't worry about feeling even like a human being for a few weeks! Having a shower or brushing your teeth is an achievement in the first few days and it is impossible to feel even vaguely sexy I think for a while - for me I started feeeling human again around 6 weeks when I was out of nighties in the day time and into the swing of BF'ing and was comfortable enough to leave J in his boucny chair in the bathroom while I washed and remember clearly MIL looking after him so I could have a bath and shave my legs for the first time in ages!! even now I leaked at work and felt so embarassed and have to sleep in a bra - will feel properly sexy at some point but I am not sure when! I think you are supposed to feel really unsexy at this point - its mother nature's way of making sure you avoid any chance of getting pg (although that is obviously not going to happen for us ladies) - and that's what I kept telling DH when he kept dropping hints about getting busy    enjoy she is gorgeous and am so happy for you

Theresal lovely to hear from you and so pleased meredith is doing so well (and being so naughty!!)

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

ceci.bee said:


> I think you are supposed to feel really unsexy at this point - its mother nature's way of making sure you avoid any chance of getting pg


Errrr thats what i thought


----------



## juju81

Ahahahaha mini! For the first time in yrs your'll have to think about contraception! Coil it like me


----------



## carrie lou

Perhaps IF there is a sliver lining to our situation   it's that we never need worry about contraception again!   


Well Zac had his eye appointment this morning. He has what's called a pseudosquint. His eyes are straight and according to their measurements etc are working perfectly for a baby of his age. It's just an optical illusion that one eye is pointing inwards, caused by the shape of his eyes and his wide nasal bridge. Apparently it is quite common, no treatment needed, it will get less noticeable as he grows and they will see us again when he is 2 just to make sure.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Excellent news Carrie. I am still uncertain about Charley's eyes. Most of the time I think they are OK, but there is the odd time when I think I see more white one side than the other and the odd photo when the flash bounces off different eyes in a different place. Most photos are fine though, so I am unsure.


----------



## carrie lou

The orthoptist did say it can often look more pronounced in a photo. You could always ask your GP to have a look to put your mind at rest?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Good news carrie  

Ju snip snip snip!!


----------



## ceci.bee

Carrie fab news hun - I haven't pursued Joshi's here as it is getting better and I suspect the same - interesting what they said about the photos tho.

hazel hun - I guess worth seeing your GP if you are concenernd, but I am also like you not sure but occasionally see it in photos and wonder

lots of love
ceci


----------



## hakunamatata

carrie thats great news, must be a relief. xx


----------



## juju81

Mini       like your style! I'm thinking of names for you again.  I think Ellis.  Ok thanks.   

Hak, keep forgetting to say, a guy in my office had a boy last June and called him Edison   

Carrie, fab news.  

Mistletoe...I guress if your concerned the doc may be able to advise...even if its the same as Carrie   

I was lloking through some old posts the other day.....has anyone heard from Hellys?


----------



## northernmonkey

evening ladies,
Hope you're all well.  We've all had a cold/flu type thing so have been feeling pretty grotty for the last few weeks but are on the mend now thankfully.  I did get to spend a day in bed over half term cos I felt so rough - dh took a day off work to look after the girls and I slept more than I have in years which was lovely!  Think I'll have to fake a few illnesses in future just to catch up on some kip....  
Hak - great to hear from you, don't worry you'll start to feel normal right about the time that you have baby #2 then it'll all go pete tong again.    
Carrie - excellent news about Zac, you must be so relieved.
Teresa - yes we know all about tantrums - came as a bit of a shock cos dd#1 is so laid back, I kid you not she never had a single one.  number 2 is more than making up for her though    I try to ignore it as much as I can but sometimes my patience wears thin and she has been ceremoniously dumped in her cot from time to time. HOpe you had a lovely day with Marge, how is she?


----------



## speeder

Hi everyone - I've not posted for a wee while - sorry bout that!  

Hak - lovely to read your post and sounds like you are doing fab!  As for feeling sexy - are you nuts?!  Just get through each day hun! DH did ask me the other day about that - 10 weeks post partum now - and I just snorted...  Your little girl sounds just beautiful.  So so happy for you    How is the c-section healing?  

NM- hope you are feeling better - everyone here has had it too - yuk! How lovely to get time in bed.  Reminds me of a comedian I saw last year who said she felt like commiting a crime just so she could be put in jail and then could get to lie in bed for a few weeks!   

Teresa - tantrums - oh crivens do we get them right now.  dd1 was the angel child and overnight, at age 2 seemed to be replaced by an imposter who likes just likes you but can scream and yell so loudly it reduces me to tears! hope you are staying sane    HOw are you dealing with them?  Say hi to Marge for me - not long for her now. 

Carrie - great news about Zac. One less thing to worry about!  Holly - my friend's little girl has a really bad squint (she's nearly 3) and wears the cutest glasses and is fine with them so I think even if they do have a squint it's easy enough to fix. 

Hello to everyone else!  (Phoebs - how are you?) Mini, abcde, Rach - hope you and your bumps all growing nicely! 

AFM - well DD2 is the most beautiful, chilled calm little girl.  Just smiles and grins and coos - she's just a dream.  DD1 - well we kind of hit rock bottom with sibling jealousy this week and I've decided to take a slightly firmer stance which is working.  (No joke, she was trying to stamp on DD2's arm the other day, - can't leave her alone with her for a second   ) I think she was picking up on my mummy guilt and I was being too soft when she was acting up so I'm now being "calm but firm mum". Ha ha, in theory anyway.  

Anyway, - sorry if TMI - but I seem to have developed a proplapse.  pretty sure it's because I've had to lift a heavy toddler, buggies, car seats so soon after a second natural delivery in as many years.  GP totally disinterested but it's got worse and now I feel like I have to pee constantly.  Think I need to go back to useless GP and do something about it.  Anyone had any experience  of this? 

Sorry I don't post so much just now - the days are flying by with my little girls!  Time is going too fast!

love speeder x


----------



## ceci.bee

speeder hun so lovely to hear from you and so sorry to hear about your prolapse - I haven't got one but my mum has, and she was given an amazing pessary by her gynae which she calls the 'blue box' which is a new type that goes in really easily and keeps everything in place. you can take it out when you want and it is really easy to look after. She was offered surgery but tried this first and now doesn't want the surgery. Defo insist your GP refers you - it is a horrible thing to be dealing with and it can be fixed, either with a pessary, surgically or if you are young with normal hormones with some physio - ask your GP if he/she would like that dangling out while trying to look after two kids and be a married woman!! honestlythe medical profession make me so          !!!!!!!!!!!

lots of love to all 
Ceci


----------



## Spaykay

Speeder - I'm going to buy some cone weight things to pop up and tighten up my pelvic floor. The peeing has go t better though. DD2 sounds so sweet. Sprry DD1 is being so norty, it will get better (then worse) then better...

kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Speeder that sounds like a horrible thing to live with  Definitely go back to that GP and nag nag nag until you get a referral! Like Ceci says, there are plenty of things they can do to treat it and you shouldn't have to put up with it.    


I have a cat prancing all over the keyboard  Think she is feeling a bit attention starved, she was our "baby substitute" before Z came along and she doesn't really know what's hit her now


----------



## spooks

hello all been reading but rubbish at posting   
all okay here with me.
wanted to say on the eye issue that we noticed DD had a few strange photos where her eye looked like it was covered in a white film. My dad insisted we take her to the optician to be checked out as he'd read something about tumours and cancers being picked up this way (not meaning to alarm anyone). The optician ruled out anything sinister but referred us anyway to be on the safe side, we had an appintment straight away and fortunately everything fine - consultant said sometimes it happens when a set of circumtances come together - being photographed with a lamp behind you with the camera held at a certain angle etc. I felt like a bit of a time waster TBH but he was more than happy to see us and said they'd rather people went to them than not. So if in any doubt I would say go to GP/ optician.  
hope everyone else is well  
   speeder, hope you get the problem sorted - just demand for something to be done   
love to all, spooks


----------



## speeder

Thanks girls - you are always lovely   

Kay - I bought those cone things - sorry if TMI but I couldn't even hold the empty cone let alone any weights.... The little booklet said that was unusual and I had to go to my GP.    We should have weight lifting competition for our pelvic floors but I'm definitely the loser already   

It would almost be funny if my GP wasn't so disinterested.  Said the prolapse too minor to cause the contant feeling of wanting to pee all the time.  Is taking tests for diabetes!!!!  There was trace glucose in my urine apparently. I never even had gestational diabetes so slightly concerned.....so what with that plus proplapse I'm honestly falling apart!  I'm already a bit anxious so this has sent it through the roof.  Is anxiety a symptom of PND??  I have this ongoing worry that I'm going to leave my beautiful kids and I'm sure it's not healthy.  It's like I can't stop thinking how lucky I am but that it's all about to change....

Sorry such a downer post.  My pelvic floor AND mood are heading south   

Hello spooks


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ah hun   yes anxiety is a big symptom of pnd. I had anxiety. Its not nice. Go to another gp and ask for citalopram.  It's fab.  As for the pelvic floor. I have none either.  

Afm. My placenta hasn't moved. It's still low.  The cow that scanned me and said it was fine was wrong.    seeing con next wk. so probdbly a c section  now   I feel like making a complaint.  This is the 2nd time they made a big mistake.  But this time it could of been a matter of life or death.  I could of gone into labour and bled to death.


----------



## carrie lou

Spooks  Hope all OK with you  


Mini so sorry about the placenta  That's really rubbish after being told you could avoid c-section. I know it's not what you wanted but I'm sure it will be fine. Hope your appointment goes well.  


Speeder yes I'm sure anxiety can be part of PND. I went through a phase of terrible anxiety last year over what happened with my in-laws, there were days when I didn't want to get out of bed and couldn't cope with looking after Z properly  I thought I was getting PND but thankfully it passed. It's really really horrible though, feeling like that. Definitely go and have a chat with someone, if your GP isn't helpful ask to see another one.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Speeder - I also have a worry about leaving C and there is no one else on the planet that would care for him. DH is not involved much with C and you know how keen he was on the donor thing, and I find more and more that his parenting ideas are very strange and rather cold. His brother lives in Aus and I don't have any siblings. I need to make some provision and change my will ASAP, but I just don't know what to do. I hate to think of C not knowing me or my family or why anything happened and perhaps even being adopted by a stranger. It is frightening me thinking about it.  

I am also worrying every minute of everyday about leaving C when I go back to work. I want to work 3 days a week, but work has refused so I am trying to make an alternative, but there just isn't anything viable. I am paying all the bills, doing all the childcare and doing all the housework and my DH is working everyday at his business he set up after he was made redundant, but I do not see a penny.   

I am loving being a mummy and just want to stay at home doing it full time. I need a miracle to happen.

Off to check my Euromillions ticket!


----------



## speeder

mini - makes me so angry to hear of errors like that Hun. sorry but thank goodness it's been picked up   I know you didn't want a CSection  . 

Holly  . I wonder if all mums have these thoughts. horrible aren't they, especially at 3am   today I consoled myself that if my dd's were ever to be adopted how lovely most adopting parents seem to be. see - I really am going nuts.  . and my dh is amazing with them but I worry about something happening to him too! I'm sorry as you sound quite alone - how do you mean dh is quite cold in his parenting?  what are we like - we should be having much much happier thoughts about our beautiful babies. 

carrie - anxiety is truly yuk - you had so much on your plate with your awful inlaws. 

nite - a peaceful nite for us all I hope x


----------



## juju81

Holly/speeder, I go sit there go hours crying when I think of something happening to us and Noah wondering where we are. I sorted my life insurance out and have already arranged for Noah to live with my sister should anything happen, god forbid. It makes me well up thinking about it.

Holly it's sad ur husband isn't playing much of a parenting role. I thought he'd came round to it all? Does C not have much of a relationship? He's really missing out, both of them, Noah and nick idolise each other, I'd be heatrbroken if nick wasn't interested. Hopefully he'll sort himself out Hun and I'm pretty sure if something were to happen he'd rise to te challenge and make sure C was ok  

Spooks, wow not long until ur ready to pop  

Mini   I know u didn't want a csection either, u know it's the right thing tho. I don't think a letter is a bad idea. They'll probably only say sorry


----------



## Spaykay

speeder - yes anxiety is sign of PND, please talk to your GP if it continues. I had it with DD, didn't want a second child as I found it all so hard (thank G I had a miracle!). We try so hard to become mummies we expect it all to be easy, happy etc etc...but trying hard creates more anxiety as we feel we should always be happy as it's what we always wanted...but we're only human!

Holly - my DH has a struggling relationship with DD as he did so lttle with her when young. He really missed out and it's so frustrating. He puts his time before her and expects her to play his games when he wants and really doesn't listen to her. He really doesn't have much of a clue but is improving! It's so sad to watch isn't it! It means he can't give her breakfast, take her to see his mum etc etc because it just upsets her too much. I saw it happening but he is really too stubborn tio listen or see his faults. I'm determined he'll do more with DS, but I worry he'll not be patient enough etc...but as I say...he IS improving. I just wish he WANTED to learn and do more. He gets bored so quickly so 1 minute it's all hyper play and the next it's 'leave me alone' or he's asleep on the sofa! He has to help me ith controlled crying to cut a night feed in a month so lord help us!!!! How is C's relationship with DH? DD rejects DH so often, I hate it.

waffle waffle

Kay xxx


----------



## juju81

I think I may have had a touch of PnD looking back. What u say is so true. Because of what we've been through we feel bad for feeling like we might have PnD  

The only thing I'd moan about nick for is his working extra. I really can't fault his parenting. I had a whole day off Sunday and chilled out whilst he took Noah out for the day with him. He's always been hands on. His mums always saying how lucky I am but I'm not sure I'm lucky, surely he's just being a dad and doing why he should? Oh the only thing he hates doing is reading to him 

He's ur to have major back surgery on Thursday and I'm dreading it. Noah's really gonna struggle


----------



## Spaykay

Juju - yeh...does anyone say they're lucky to have us if we're great mums? 

Mini - sorry about the csection but so long as bubba is looked after and healthy. They are naughty confusing all the information

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

It's very true what you say, I feel like I should be enjoying every minute of being with Z because of all we went through to have him but we ARE only human and we all have off days or sad days  


My DH is also very good with Z, does his bath time every night when he gets home from work, reads to him, takes him to the park at weekends. I really can't complain. The only thing is that he is not very patient when Z is grizzly but hey, no one's perfect.


----------



## Spaykay

DH has been great today  Reallly making an effort. Lacks initiative but hey.

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Don't they all


----------



## amandaloo

aya ladies
Hope all is well with you all, looks like it might be a lovely day
Mightymini- sorry to hear they have messed you about   hope it all goes well for you it wont be long now eh      
Speeder- anxiety and depression often in my experience go hand in hand quite a lot of ppl who experience depression do suffer from anxiety also. If your worried Id go and speak to your GP.       
I havent heard from Pheobs in quite a while hope she is ok  
AFM- Sorry ive quickly done an AFM and not many posts back to others  . Ive been looking into starting our next tx. I managed to find out that we have to be rereffered by our GP to a private hospital where the consultants work where ive had my tx before. I dont really want to start until aug/sept quite fancy fitting a holiday abroad in before hand if I can. Plus wanted to be back at work at least two months as well. Anyway glad ive started looking into it early now as the process could take a while. They also said if i wanted to speed it up I could make an appt and take an accompanying letter with me from my GP hmmmm not sure if GP will do that for us anyway made an appt to see GP think its in 2 weeks time so will see. Does anyone have any idea how much it costs for FET drugs and wheres best to buy them from?
Amanda x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Amanda - My whole FET cost £1,500. but that was a few years ago. The drugs were a small amount cos you only need burselin which is dirt cheap and then the patches which are cheap then the cyclogest again is cheap. I think you can get them from Asda? But not on the toiletry aisle


----------



## Fizzypop

Oooh yeah, remember something about asda selling ivf drugs at cost a while back. 


Mini - when do they give you date for cs?


Amanda - if all works out for me, we will be cycling at the same time! Did not know GP had to refer you if private, I thought you just went along to clinic (in fact, surely if you are paying you do not need GP referral as GP does not have to be involved?) better phone my clinic to check...mind you we got funded at a private clinic who have all our details and ds so maybe different?


----------



## amandaloo

Fizzypop- I know I was shocked when I was told and two ppl at same clinic told me same thing apparently they found it difficult when ppl were just turning up or something along them lines. I personally think it's because of money making as that first appt is gonna cost me 200 pound and I bloomin know what's wrong and what I need . Nether the less I still have to go down this route . I'd find out if i was you , most prob all clinics are different . I'm glad I rang though now as there is a waiting list and will need more tests too plus a rereferal can all take time. If we start the ball rolling now hopefully Id be able to start aug/sept .

Mightymini- thanks  , you always make me chuckle


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Fizzy seeing con on thurs so will know then hopefully.  At least with a c section I'll save my bits from being butchered. Plus my bladder might recover a bit better


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Amanda - I did an FET after I lost Beanie. I was only going to have progynova and cyclogest but ended up down regulating with buserelin and the pill for a month.
The FET was supposed to cost £950 with scans and the progynova and cyclogest from Boots was about £12 for the oestrogen and £42 for 3 boxes of cyclogest, but in the end I had to pay £5 for the pill and £38 for the buserelin. 
The worst thing of all (apart from the eventual BFN) was my protocol was to begin after a bleed without downregulating and my lining stayed too thick. I had three scans in a week to see if I could begin the cycle and the lining went from 14mm to 8mm, but needs to be 4mm or less to start. They abandoned the cycle and then tried to charge me £125 for each scan - £375     I managed to negotiate to two scans as I told them the first one would be too early with my lining always being very thick, but they were insistent on doing it, but still £250 was insult to injury.

I also want to try with my frozen blast and at my age it is now or never I suppose. I have to be 1 year post c-section, which is not far off. I cannot believe C is 8.5months old. I wonder if it does not work whether I would do another fresh IVF?

You need to have up to date smear, chlamydia, and a few blood tests, but I don't think you need to have them all as they are not storing any gametes.

It is worth getting all your copy notes sent to the new clinic in advance to save time. Open days at some clinics can attract a discount on the initial appointment, so it is worth finding out if they have one.

When I said that DH does not do much with C - he has only fed him once and has never done his nappy or dressed him or bathed him. He wont baby sit him as he says he can't deal with the crying and is frightened of getting angry with him when he is only a baby. He says maybe he will feel more confident when he is a bit older and they can talk about things. He has however started to get more involved with playtime recently now C is doing more and being more interactive. In fact, tonight DH has been very sweet with him which is a turn up for the book. He has also been taking video for a couple of weeks, which is nice. 
I asked DH last night outright whether he loves C and he said of course he loves him, which is also good.    

When I say odd parenting and rather cold - he says odd things like when C falls over and bumps himself and cries that I should not pick him up straight away and kiss it better, I should wait for C to stop crying and then pick him up otherwise I will make him into a mummy's boy and he will cry all the time. Peculiar if you ask me! I would NEVER leave a hurt child to cry. I won't flap and make the hurt seem worse, but will pick up, check for serious injury, provide comfort and reassurance, kiss magic make it better kisses and say you are all right. Like any mummy would.

My MIL told me off for picking C up when he was crying laying on her floor playing. He suddenly wanted a cuddle after playing happily for a while, so I went and got him. I saw a glimpse of where the cold parenting might come from with her comment that C is manipulating me and I should not go over and pick him up.


----------



## Spaykay

Holly - my DH also says it's the age and when EG is older he'll do mpre. But EG won't let him do things now as he didn't bond with her early on  he's being much better with A though. Up bringing has a lot to blame eh! I give a minute befire rushing in to see if it's real ouch or attention puch, but not until they stop crying  i see their theory but think it's a bit harsh...esoecially so young! DH used to tell me off as my shout of shock is what made EG cry rather tgan the injury.

Starting CC fir first wake feed todsy 

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Good luck


----------



## Spaykay

Woken...chatted...cried...I went in and said shhh and put him correct way in cot...chatted 7 mins now crying...can't be that hungry is my guess!!! Gonna surf the web. Hopefully win't have time to do much.DH's snoring is drowning out the crying thank goodness.

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

How did it go?


----------



## Spaykay

Well, cried on and off fir 1 hr 30 mins. Longest stretch with no food has been until  3.30 so at 3.30 I was about to cave in and he fell asleep  Woke at 4.50 and I gave him his feed...a happy boy. So that was 9h 20 mins thriugh the night. Not looking forward to tonight.

Kay xxx


----------



## ceci.bee

MIni hun I am really sorry about your placenta still being low lying. I have heard of lots of women being told at a later scan that they placenta was still low when an earlier scan had said it was ok - I think it is about the placenta having to be at least 2cm from the os of the cervix and this is easier to measure accurately when it is later on rather than before 32 weeks - not a problem for me as mine was bang over and didn't move at all. I would write the formal letter and make sure you bring it up - getting your head around a CS is a big deal, but ultimately it is the best way to get you and baby safely together and I am sure they will look after you properly.

Speeder anxiety defo goes along with mood changes and all can be part of PND which can pop up at any time         esp fears of leaving/loosing your baby          please go back and see a different GP with a list of your worries and book a double appointment to sort out your mood and your pelvic floor - neither is going to make the other better without some imput from the medical side - you can't sort out anxiety while constantly needing to pee with your bits falling out, and that will make you more anxious if you know what I mean. You don't have to feel like this and they should be able to help you - wish I could come back from Malawi to make some calls for you!!! 

Holly I am so sorry to hear about your probs with DH bonding with C- we all learn so much parenting subconsiously from our parents as we grow up, and it sounds like DH has his strange ideas from his mum. I am so pleased they are playing together - maybe if you actually go out and leave them together they will be fine and that will increase DH's confidence in his father role??        I am sorry also about going back to work and money - I hope work see sense that having you back part time is better than no time and that DH sees he has to contribute to the household!! 

Spay well done with DS sounds like a struggle       

AFM have a quick question about J - recently he had a cold and since then he has this funny mucousy noise at the back of his throat, especailly after he drinks and he coughs a lot after eating - anyone else seen this and did it go away on its own

thanks guys and big   
llots of love
Ceci


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ceci - they should of done an internal scan on me at 32wks but the stupid woman didn;t and she was meant to measure the femer too whic she didn;t    I've got my head around a CS now, in fact i'm looking forward to them not cutting my bits up and not being in pain down below!    I know i'll be in pain else where but i honestly couldn't sit down last time. also my bladder might be in working order afterwards!   

Sorry i can't help with joshs mucus. Maybe its cattarh? 

Holly - alot of dads find newborns a struggle and boring. but once they are able to interact properly then they suddenly find it more interesting. Doesn't help the fact that its all left to you tho.    He doesn't know what hes missing.    As for the not comforting when hes hurt is very strange    I don't run to DS as soon as hes fallen, but i don't ignore him, i give him lots of magic kisses! 

Kay - You'll find he won't cry as long tonight. GOod luck


----------



## Spaykay

I'm not doing it again. He was noticeably more clingy today and cried when I put him on the mat to get changed thios morning...which he NEVER does. Gonna wait until he's 6 months and then at least I know I'll be doing it because it's an age they suggest it should be done at. 

Kay xxx


----------



## Spaykay

ceci - I always take the kids to docs with a cold so I have no idea. Do you use a snot sucker and clean out his nose with saline water? It may all just be getting stuck there. Have you also tilted his cot or matress to allow snot to run down and out?

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

ithink i did DS at 5 months. But we did pick up put down. shushed and picked up amd down for 20 mins then left to cry for 10 mins. It did work. 

What about a dummy?

Ceci - i usually take to the docs too if have a cold, only in case of chest infection. I also lift the mattress up at the head end and use nasel drops to clear nose, Basically eveything Kay does


----------



## Spaykay

MM - I know it works  Did it with DD for naps and also have done it with DS to sleep train...but I think he actually is hungry still as he knows how to get himself to sleep.  I WILL do it  just not strong enough yet.

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

well if he needs to eat then just go with it. Youre right to stop at 6 months tho. I  used a dummy to see if he would go back to sleep and not feed. it worked but then we had to get rid of the dummy eventually cos he was waking up for it


----------



## speeder

Just a quickie as heading off to bed...

Ceci - thanks so much for your response    Seeing GP on Thursday and will try to remain calm and composed and ASSERTIVE.  Re the mucousy thing - I think they can be clogged up for a while longer with a cold.  It's hard to picture the symptoms you describe.  I know that DD can be very mucousy after a cold if I give her a lot of cows milk products so you could try cutting back on that for a few days to see if it reduces the mucous? Is it like a snoring noise?    If his little nose is blocked maybe he feels quite blocked up trying to breathe through his mouth and eat at the same time?  When DD is like that I raise her cot too and also put some hot water with menthol oil in it in her room, and put her in the shower room with me and shut the door to get lots of steam into her little chest! Is he eating OK? xx

Holly - I know a few mums who are quite cold when their little ones hurt themselves and cry too.  I'm all for not overreacting but, like you, I hate to see them genuinely upset and being ignored.  It's a hard one when parenting styles are so different.  you sound like a very warm compassionate mum. I also think it's a generational thing - lots of grannies tell me that it's good for babies to cry as it strengthens their lungs.....   

Kay - sorry you are having sleep issues - I hope you are coping.... If you have any tips let me know!

nite girls xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Ceci - Charley always has that aspiration/ mucus cough when he has a snuffle nose, which is every other week it seems.  We had a snot free zone for about 10 days last week or two  , then Saturday the runny nose started again because Daddy had a stinky cold  and the wet throaty sound and the clearing throat cough has come back. It comes and goes with us and I think it is just a post nasal drip.

Interestingly I have to cough to clear my throat if I have ice cream or thick milkshake. Must be similar for babies having milk.

http://www.webmd.com/allergies/postnasal-drip

/links


----------



## ceci.bee

thanks guys really helpful advice - will try raising the bed tonight to see if it helps it drip down xx


----------



## northernmonkey

Hi ladies,


Hope you're all well. I've had dd off school part of this week with a cold/flu type virus that it seems most of the local population have had - I think every child in her class has been off with it at some point this week. And scarlet fever has been confirmed in a couple of schools too.... Roll on summer and an end to these bugs...




Speeder-how did you get on with th gp? I really empathise with you on the anxiety front because I'm the same. I've always been a worrier but am a million times worse since having children-I too constantly worry about something happening to me and not being around for the girls. Doesn't help now that my eldest understands a bit more of life and says things to me like "I don't want you to die before me because then I won't have a mummy"    I'm making an effort to be more rational lately but I guess some of us worry more than others. Lots of my friends are the same though so I do think it's pretty common. 


Mini- any idea when you'll have your section? 


Amanda- I had to get a gp referral letter too before my current clinic would see us. I thought it was total madness-why on earth would a couple be asking for tx using donor sperm if they didn't have to? Anyway, my gp has always been absolutely fantastic in dealing with our fertility problems and he did the letter immediately and faxed it through to them-I think the clinic rang me within 2 days of my initial call to them to book us in for a consultation. 


Oop, just heard dd waking, better go get her out of the cot-she's trying her best to climb out lately and one of these days she might just manage it.... sorry for lack of personals!


----------



## amandaloo

Hi ladies

Mistletoe- thanks for the info sounds like the drugs needed for fet won't break the bank . Sorry to hear about dh and DS   sounds like you do everything it must be hard for you   . Hopefully when DS gets older he will become more interactive with him . Are you going to try again with your blast ? 

Northernmonkey- thanks for reply it's interesting to know others have has to do the same . I wonder if the quick response is because you were paying private. I hope so . I've got a gp appt in 2 weeks time so hoping they will be helpful .sounds like you've had a week of it hope they don't catch any more bugs  

Juju- hope your hubby is ok.  

Spaykay - how are you getting on ? I never did any CC at all I didn't even know it existed  . The only thing I did was around 4 weeks I started to be more firm and let him cry as long as I knew he wasn't hungry wet etc ... He soon started to self settle. I know I tried giving water instead of a bottle and that worked he soon got fed up of waking for a sip of water, But can't remember when I started doing that to be honest :-/ wish I'd written things down now . 

Right best be off 

Amanda x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Saw con yesterday and she said i can have a natural (after me deciding a section might be better on my lady bits!    ) unless i bleed of course, then its a section. Got a scan in 2 weeks to see if its moved then see con with a 'plan'


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I am sure I had the easy option with a section Mini. But it isn't right for everyone. I hope whichever way it turns out it is the best for you.

Amanda - yes I would love to try again with my frozen embryo. Not sure how I would cope with two with no support around or afford it, but I guess anything is possible. Other people manage.


----------



## Spaykay

Mistletoe - I wondered the same as you with no.2 but DH helps loads more now and yes...you do just cope!

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Do U?!


----------



## Spaykay

MM - honestly! My mum said with no. 2 I wouldn't feel the same anxieties and depression. I just dudn't believe her as I got so low with EG, constantly crying, rocking in corners etc etc! With A it has been nothing like that. No anxiety attacks, no depression...I actually understand this time why mum's enjiy babies! (not enough to tempt a thitd mind ) You know they get easier, you know they change and you know that ur first born has a pal for life. Funny though...I'm still far more protective of EG and DH is more with A. That second one just can't top the first 

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Thanks hun. It's just the logistics of everything is worrying me   Ho hum!!


----------



## hakunamatata

hey girls sorry ive been awol, been a bit busy lol.
ju hope hubby is getting better xx
seeder i understand your anxiety hun, thats a main symptom of my bi polar, big hugs. and im soon learning there's so much you can worry about xx
nm sorry illness has hit your house, cant imagine the dimension that adds, but less sleep im sure.
sk i take my hat of to you guys having more than one, this is something im just not sure about now. ive recovered really well from c section but cant imagine having c section toddler and newborn.... we've even discussed adoption. early days i know but its tick tock for me at 37 now lol.
mini typical isnt it just when you get your head around your c section. i have soon learnt that nothing goes to plan with pregnancy and childbirth, but sooooooo worth it.
poor addi has got a terrible nappy rash and colic (check spelling lol, sure its not right). oh the screams of pain from afternoon and evening, so heart wrenching. hubby deals with it so much better than me. xx she even cries when passing wind and goes so red and rithes around, usually with my nipple in mouth lol.
shes sleeping now and i managed 12 mins with nappy off to get air to it for her. then she was cold and upset. of course she did pee, which she does to dh regularly. washing machine getting a good workout but so worth it, fore when she grabs my finger i melt. xx
shes stirring now so better go on standby, bye for now xxxx
thinking of you all


----------



## carrie lou

Hakuna sorry about the colic hun, it's horrible, Z had it but grew out of it at 3/4 months so it doesn't last forever (even though it feels like it sometimes  ). Have you tried colic drops, we gave Z infacol with each feed and it seemed to help. You can get it from the chemists.        It's really hard I know.


----------



## northernmonkey

Hak- thankfully neither of mine have ever suffered from colic, but they've both had nappy rash and I can highly recommend metanium cream. It's absolutely amazing and in my opinion the only one that works. I've seen my girls with bright red broken skin from nappy rash and the metanium has virtually cleared it up overnight. You have to apply it thinly enough that you can see the skin texture through it then let it work it's magic! if you do get some make sure you get the yellow cream rather than the white daily ointment. Oh and not everywhere sells it-I think boots or a pharmacy are your best bet. 


Mini-you'll be fine honestly. Disorganised is my middle name and I've survived 2- can't be that bad or I wouldn't be trying for a third.....


----------



## juju81

Hak, if she's still taking some formula try her on the cow and gate comfort. Works a treat. Turns their poo slightly green tho so don't be alarmed!

Mini, stop panicking. If I've learnt something from nicks op it not to stress about things before thy have happened. How long have I been stressing about it and actually it's not bad at all. Ur'll be fine. Stumpy will be fine becaus he has to be and the same with L  

Nicks fine btw, doing stuff h shouldn't and not resting


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - Metanium is the biz. I agree. C had really nasty screamy nappy rash a few weeks ago - a red raw bottom. Within 6 hours of metanium it was down to a load of spots and within another 6 hours virtually gone. I got mine in ASDA. It is yellow and stains, but works brilliantly.

If it still does not clear then a trip to the doctor to see if it needs antifungal, antiseptic and steroid cream. Air also as you have been doing and gentle immediate cleaning is really all you can do.


----------



## hakunamatata

thanks girls youre amazing. addi has infacol before every feed and is now on the metanium, since monday night. she has the steroid cream..... i think its getting better. 3/4 months carrie, wow that does seem a long time for colic xx big bugs and thanks to all i really appreciate your advice xx


----------



## juju81

It's cupcakes due date today...no sign. She's gonna text me as soon as she had news


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Wow - where did that time go - can't wait to hear Cupcake's news - tell her to come back on here ASAP - we miss her!


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## carrie lou

Oooh exciting, lots of good luck to Cupcake and I hope Baby Cupcake doesn't keep her waiting too long... tell her to come and tell us the news herself, we miss her!!!


----------



## juju81

I keep telling her. Shes started worrying again. Hopefully once baby is here well and safe she'll come back on!


----------



## carrie lou

Oh bless her. Cupcake - time to accept you ARE going to be a mummy!!!    


Hak - I didn't mean to scare you re. the colic.  Yes it lasted until 3/4 months but weeks 4-8 were the worst. After 2 months it gradually got better until finally it was gone. Don't worry, there's light at the end of the tunnel


----------



## Spaykay

Haku - I used infacol on A as he started screaming at 6 weeks. Magically at 12 weeks he stopped. It seems to last forever...but it won't, and then you'll really get to know your LO!

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Ju - What is Cupcake worrying about?


----------



## juju81

Something going wrong in preg, now something going wrong in labour and shes worried she will see something on here!     


Hopefully will have news soon!  :-D


----------



## teresal

Happy Birthday Noah    

xx


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## juju81

Have some news on baby cupcake


Would like to announce the arrival of baby Lilly, born 16th march at 22.10 weighing 7lb 5oz     

Congratulations to both or u cupcake. Enjoy her hun xxxx


----------



## carrie lou

Congratulations Cupcake and DH and welcome baby Lilly!!!  I hope everything is going well and can't wait to hear more from you    


 Noah, have a lovely day


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## hakunamatata

yippee for mr and mrs cupcake, yippee                   

and happy birthday to our lovely cheaky chappy noah


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Happy Birthday Noah    

Many congrats to Cupcake    See nothing to worry about!   

.................me next, Gulp!


----------



## teresal

Congratulations cupcake & hubby, enjoy baby lily   

still waiting for news on margesimpson, shes only 4 days over but seems to be taking its time 

xx


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## amandaloo

Cupcake - congratulations on the birth of your precious baby  girl Lilly wonderful news   hope you come back and tell us all about it x

Juju - hope Noah has had a lovely day x

Margiesimpson- good luck x

I haven't heard a thing from Phoebs it's been over a month now hope everything is ok  . Maybe she's left or is taking a break


----------



## speeder

Just popping on quickly to say HUGE congratulations to Cupcake     - I hope she will come back on now that she can relax a little bit!. 

Hak -are you using Pampers newborn nappies?  They gave DD2 horrendous nappy rash - I tried every cream under the sun before switching nappies and it cleared up very quickly after that.  I think they put nasty things in their nappies.  just a thought xx

Mini - if I can cope with 2 anyone can - I am extremely disorganised - I am the mum who forgets nappies and nappy bags and every time I get in the car I turn round to check I haven't forgotten a child! I once got out the car to go to the park and actually left the car door open the whole time I was there.  The first few weeks will be crazy and then I promise it just kinds of falls into place.  I want another baby but DH has said absolutely no way! 

night - soooo tired as not getting enough sleep!

x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Another        We left the car door wide open when we went to register DS at the reg office!


----------



## hakunamatata

ahhhh speeder youre fantastic hun.
will bare pampers thing in mind. it is slowly getting better. we have bought nappies in bulk tho lol
managed to do some hoovering this am, and flitted duster, feel good. have phychiatric nurse coming later but they dont seem that worried about me. tho i do need to make an effort to go to some groups. mum not here this week, so maybe i will venture....
hope you girls are ok, esp ju have you injured yourself and how is hubby?
nm are you having treatment hun, ive lost track?


----------



## Spaykay

Haku - baby groups saved my life the 1st time round!

Speeder/Mini - I left the front door wide open and went out for the day! Didn't tell DH!

Made DH a birthday cake today...Looks and tastes kinda dodgy! But hey, I made it....DD going to decorate it later if she doesn't throw it across the kitchen in a tantrum fit!

YAWWWWWWN!

kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## teresal

Just heard from margesimpson, baby still very comfortable inside so she is booked in for section on fri   

xx


----------



## carrie lou

Good luck to Marge    Can't wait to hear your news hun, hope it all goes well


----------



## amandaloo

Owwwwww best of luck to margiesimpson xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Good luck marge


----------



## Spaykay

Not 'met' Margie...but all the best with the arrival of your little one. Soon you'll be receiving lots of lovely gurgly hugs!!!

Kay xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

best of luck marge xx


----------



## northernmonkey

Cupcake- belated congratulations, hope you're settling into mummyhood ok. Love the name too, it's one of my favourites-so pretty. 


Marge- good luck for Fri, hope it all goes smoothly. 


Hak- I was like spaykay and found the groups a lifeline first time round. And I was adamant before dd was born that I wouldn't be doing any baby groups cos it just wasn't my scene... As it turned out I was always first there! Yes I'm cycling at the mo. Last cycle was abandoned so am on 2nd attempt now.  as of yesterday I had 2 follies of 12 and 16mm and am back at clinic for scan tomorrow. To be honest I'm hoping that only one follie is still growing by then because the possibility of twins terrifies me. Overall though am really excited that I could be pregnant again soon!!         


Juju-hope Noah had good birthday. Did he have a party? 


Hope everyone else is well and looking forward to long Easter weekend and the lighter nights - I can't wait for clocks to go forward this weekend!! 


Speak soon,


Nm
X


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - I live at the children's centre   
post natal groups, play groups, baby massage courses, child behaviour courses, breast feeding groups, singing group, swimming, parent forum, clinic you name it i'm there!


----------



## juju81

Just briefly read back, good luck for fri Marge  

Hak, I go to toddler groups with Noah it a nice way of getting out and mixing with other mums too

NM, I had 3 big follies with both cycles and only have Noah (obviously there are people with twins) goof luck for ur scan  

Thanks for ur birthday wishes, we had a quiet day, for those of u who aren't on ** my hubby had a major back op 2wk ago so we don't have a lot of money and he can't do much. Noah has his joint party on Saturday at our local leisure centre so that will be nice!


----------



## pippilongstockings

Just coming on for a nosey.....   
ooh good luck marge, will be looking out for your news.
nm - very jealous that you're going for #3. I don't think we'll be going for it, DH is firmly against the idea! Sorry I didn't get back to you on PM ages ago - for some reason it's not letting me send PMs? I blame juju, it was all fine until I tried to reply to her   
juju - hope DH's back is getting better. How long will he have to take off work? 
mini - i'm checking ** every day for news from you   
teresa - helllooooooo!
Gotta go and pick up my car sorry for the flying visit! I do come on here once in a while but I'm desperately trying to put babymaking out of my head now and this place makes me soooooo broody.


----------



## hakunamatata

good luck for tomorrow nm, pray you have one lovely lead follie xx
girls i will defo do the groups just dont seem to have found time yet. xx thank goodness hubby home, im aching and exhausted lol, lightweight hey x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No, you're just a woman that's had a baby   I didn't start groups til he was 6 wks old.  I just did baby sensory. I went to one baby group and hated it! It was at tgen wrong time and complete crap! The toddler groups are better.  

I actually met another mum friend through my slimming group !  

Pippi - another mad woman wanting #3   think you'll be waiting a while yet for the announcement.  Head not down enough   still could be sat here anothe 3 wks.  Getting fed up now.  Don't want to be induced


----------



## carrie lou

I'm another fan of our children's centre  We only live in a small town but there's lots going on. We go to BFing group on a Tuesday and play group on a Friday, and swimming on Saturday mornings. I love them all (but might not go to BFing group for much longer - Z is one of the oldest babies there, it's mostly for very new mummies). But Hak - I didn't get round to any groups at all until he was 6-7 weeks so don't feel bad, just get there when you can  

NM good luck for this cycle hun  

Pippi - is there no persuading DH?  I also want 3 (  ) but DH says we will only go for No 3 if we can get more sperm from the same donor. I'm so  that I would probably go ahead with a different donor if we had to - but we shall have to wait and see what happens  

Mini - hope you don't have to wait too much longer. Come on baby!   

Juju - hope DH is recovering OK   

AFU - Z is nearly 10 months! Crawling really well now, pulling himself up on everything, walking around the furniture - I'm sure he'll be walking by himself by his birthday  He's just getting over a nasty cold (so am I) so we've had a few bad nights lately but he's def on the mend now. Thought we were doing so well as he wasn't sick at all over the winter, but the last 3 weeks has just been cold after tummy bug after cold. Oh well, all good for the immune system I suppose.


----------



## Fizzypop

Hak - I remember those days! There was one day that I set myself two tasks, one was put wash on and the other was something equally as "easy", didn't manage to do either, lol! We went to bf group, have met some lovely ladies, plus baby sensory and swimming. Did you do NCT too? We generally meet every week. I also remember the panic/rush to get out of house after she finished feeding just so I could get out up town etc. seems like such a log time ago!



Mini - cant remember with ds1 was he early/late?


Nm - good luck!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hak - I did not go to groups until I had the go ahead to walk a mile and a half with the pram to get there after my c-section. I think that was about 6 weeks or so.

NM - good luck!

Juju - hope your DH is OK

Pippi - nice to hear from you!
I can understand the feeling of broodiness. I am feeling it now. Never thought I would after I got my miracle come true - thought I'd be satisfied with one, which I am of course, but I would love to do it all again.

Carrie - Z sounds like C.
C was  9 months yesterday and is into absolutely everything. He is also cruising the furniture and pulling himself up. The last few days he has worked out how to get back onto his knees to crawl to the next place to be naughty. Better as we were having rather a lot of falls. He starts to fall over more when he is tired, but he refuses to stay sitting or crawling now and is constantly compelled to try and stand up, even when breast feeding - ouch, and in the bath.

He is emptying anything he can get his hands onto - DVD cabinet, my handbag, the bathroom drawers. I shall have to do some more baby proofing. I am up and down like a yoyo - hoping it will shift some flab!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Fizzy - Late   had sweep at 41 wks which broke my waters and ended up being induced.  Got a feeling history is repeating itself.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

holly it gets worse!!!  It's only really now at 20 mths he's calmed down.   only now he wants to stand on a chair so he can reach the work top.


----------



## Fizzypop

Oooo no, too comfy in there  I tried every tip in the book to bring on labour and nothing bloomin worked. Mind you, they couldn't even do stretch n sweep so you are one step ahead. Sending lots of labour inducing vibes in the book xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

When  I say they did a sweep, they said it was unsuccessful cos cervix wasn't ready.  But it broke my waters


----------



## amandaloo

aya ladies
Mightymini- you never know they say your 2nd can come earlier    oh and thank goodness you said you didnt do groups either as I know i dont   i only managed 2 baby massage classes!! 

Hak- It took me about 4 months i think before i took my DS to a group I only managed to go twice! It wasnt really for me wasnt sure what it was about the group everyone just went massaged their babies and left noone really spoke to each other however I did try to make conversation with ppl. Sort of put me off going to anything else. Oh and didnt go swimming with him till after christmas I must be a lazy mum ha ha ! I do have a few friends all with babies so do a lot of socialising with them and DS plays with their children. 

Pippi- Nice to see you bobbing on      

Holly/Carrie-sounds like you have your hands full.. DS not quite crawling yet however enjoying the rest while it lasts  
Marge- GOOD LUCK      
Bye for now hi to everyone I havent mentioned x


----------



## hakunamatata

come on iccle mini we dont want induction for mummy xx looks like its going to burn off as another sunny day xx


----------



## hakunamatata

amanda thanks hun, will see how i get on. todays group is cancelled due to blood giving, doh x


----------



## Fizzypop

You def have to pick the right group...one of the mums from bf group went to another childrens centre group and the younger age of mums all went out for a *** break half way thru!!!


----------



## carrie lou

I've been to a group where no one talked to me  or in fact to anyone else! Just each wrapped up in their own little world with their own baby. Needless to say I didn't go back to that one  but the ones I do go to are fab  


Amanda - enjoy the peace while you can  Z's new favourite game is to drop things in the toilet, I've had to stick my hand down the loo to retrieve such items as a breast pad and a tube of toothpaste. Must remember to keep the lid down  


Lovely day here  Going to try and get some gardening done if little man will give me the chance


----------



## speeder

marge - look forward to hearing news! hope it all goes well x

mini - I was induced at two weeks over with dd1 and yet dd2 was only 2 days late. hang fire! I never eat fast food but it was a mcdonalds meal that got things moving for me. too revolting for dd2 to cope with and my waters broke soon after. 

pippi - hello - I am soooooo broody too. how can we persuade our husbands?!? our house is too small and being skint doesn't help in our case!

I love some of the groups I go too - mums and toddlers is fab for getting out the house. but a ghastly woman criticised me for using a dummy at the breatfeeding group and another woman was feeding her four year old and I found it all rather odd! 

very foggy here today - welcome to Scotland....


----------



## northernmonkey

Speeder/pippi- hope you can both persuade your dh's to go for a third. Mine was undecided for a while - in fact we both were- and he really doesn't relish the thought of the sleepless nights again (funny that seeing as it was me who did all the night feeds   ) but I'm so glad he came round to it. Nice to hear from you by the way pippi- how's Luke settled into school? 


Mini- you never know the minute labour could start.... I was 5 days overdue with dd, it was 11.30pm on a Sunday and dh let the dog out for a wee and moaned to the neighbour that baby still hadn't arrived so he'd have to go to work the next morning. 5 hours later he was catching her on our living room floor. Fingers crossed you're not waiting much longer.


Carrie/holly- gosh, boys sound like hard work!! I was thinking it would be nice to have a boy next time round but perhaps I should stick to girls   


Well I had my scan today and it's all go for Monday-still got 2 follies but I'm not stressing about it now. Let's face it there's more chance of me not getting a bfp than getting twins. Can't believe I'll be starting another 2ww....  Thanks for your good luck messages.   


Hi to all of you not mentioned above, have a great weekend. 


Xx


----------



## pheobs1

Hi Everyone,  Wow I have missed a lot!

So sorry for being AWOL for ages.  FF stopped working on my phone and then I got so behind I was daunted about trying to catch up and then I was just plain lazy - no excuse for that.

I have read back a while, sorry if I miss anything out:

abcdefgh and Rachfins - so glad that all is going well xxx

SD - lovely to see/read that your little boys are doing so well xxx

Amanda - I have PM'd you.  We didn't need a letter from our gp - which is a good job because he is clueless about our tx!  DH is under a consultant so never sees the GP about his NOA.  I think FET in my clinic is £1000 including drugs.  When are you back in work?  I can't wait to finish!

Cupcake - belated congratulations on the birth of Lilly!  Hope you and DH are enjoing every second of her xxx

NM - wishing you loads of luck for IUI xxx

Congratulations to Hak on the birth of Addison xxx

Mini - hope you are ok xxx

AFM - Again sorry for being such a lazy mare.  I am feeling great apart from the tiredness but working full time doesn't help I suppose and I plan to work until the bitter end!  So what's been happening....had a private scan at 17 weeks at the clinic to find out the flavour and we are team BLUE!  We are having a beautiful little boy   They said that my placenta looked low but that it would probably be moved well out of the way by my 20 wk scan.  Had 20wk nhs scan and all looking great with the baby but my placenta is still low and I have to have another scan at 32wks, I was really uptight about it, but trying not to think about it just yet as they said there is every chance it could move before then.  Our little man is moving around lots, which I love.  I'm not anxious as long as he is moving around!  Been lathering myself in bio oil and the like three times an day and it's safe to say it hasn't worked, I am stretch mark central!

Lots of Love xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Ah Pheobs lovely to hear from you and team blue  That's great! Little boys are wonderful! (So are little girls but you know what I mean  ) Try not to worry about the placenta - quite a few ladies on here have had the same and it's all turned out fine one way or another  


Good luck NM


----------



## sweetdreams73

hello lovely ladies, will try and attempt personals as boys playing and laughing to themselves at the moment before I start giving them their tea... 
phebs - congratulations on flavour blue    , thats so lovely, sorry to hear about your placenta sure it will move out the way.
Northern Monkey - good luck with your TX       hope all goes great two follies great hun, (and you never know with twins, never say never) we only had ONE embie and it split into two and we got twins   !!! ..all the best x  

Pippi - lovely to hear from you, dont blame you getting broody! hope you can talk DH around, I am getting really broody again already and the boys are only 7 months    but my DH has totally banned me from any further TX even though we have 6 x frozen 5 day blast embies in the freezer.. take care and hugs to your lovely boys x  

hakuna - hello lovely hope you are managing to get a bit of rest inbetween feeds, sleeps etc..   . dont worry about getting out the house and going to groups at the moment, I didnt go out much in the beginning at all, it gets easier as they get a bit bigger and you get your confidence out and about!! take care hugs   

speeder - people say and do some very strange things and lets face it its none of their business!!!   ...I get some really stupid comments made to me about having twins..... we have met some lovely ladies and babes at our local childrens centre its totally fab... keeps me sain thats for sure!!...  

carrie - hope Z gets over his cold     ..wow he is a clever boy...must be amazing when they start trying to walk...although in my case... I better not wish for that too soon...trying to run after two boys going in two different directions is going to be a whole lot of fun...  

lots of     and hello to everyone else
must go my two monkeys are getting hungry now  
love sweetdreams xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pheobs my placenta has been low through out. They are not sure if it's still there or not a babys head is covering the edge. But they said I can have a natural delivery as the last scan said its low but not too bad.  I have to go in once labour starts and be monitored.  Any bleeding then it's a c section straight away.  

Boys are great!  


SD nice to see u back.  Wow can't believe the boys are 7 months.  

Nm good luck for Monday


----------



## teresal

i am pleased to announce the safe arrival of Lucy Willow, born at 3pm today, weighing 7lb. Marge and baby ok                         

congratulations to marge, dh and ds xxxxx


----------



## carrie lou

Wonderful news! Congratulations Marge and family


----------



## Rachfins

Marge and Mr Marge congratulations on the birth of your daughter.


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Congrats marge


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Congratulations Marge - lovely news for the end of the day


----------



## Fizzypop

Excellent news marge, congrats. Hope ds likes his lil sis


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## amandaloo

Marge-  wonderful news many congratulations hope you recover well xxx


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## abcdefgh

Marge - Fantastic news! Huge congratulations on your little girl.    

Pheobs - Lovely to hear from you   . Congrats on your little boy - how exciting. x

Mini - Wow, not long to go. Thinking of you and hoping everything goes smoothly. x

AFM - Everything seems to be ok I think. The last few weeks have been weird as I've been feeling pretty normal so it's all a bit surreal, but I'm starting to get a bump now so there's definitely something going on in there   . 20 week scan is on Friday. Just hope everything is ok and then we can start getting really excited and buying lots of baby things! xx


----------



## teresal

marge text today to say that she spelt the name wrong last night its Lucie not Lucy    think she can be forgiven this time   
she says she is being quiet for now so heres hoping that lasts a while

xx


----------



## hakunamatata

congrats marge thats fab xx

phoebs congrats team blue hope the placenta is kind to you and doesnt interfere with delivery

sd so wonderful to hear from you. cant believe how the boys have grown, i really take my hat of to you, just cant imagine 2, addi is wonderful but oh so tiring lol. she does sleep through church tho, think she likes the singing, used to mummy singing, tho songs a bit different from bon jovi. how cool would that be, bon jovi in church lol xx

nm good luck for tomorrow hun, cant wait to hear how it went.

lots of love to all my fabulous girlies, abc so pleased to hear all is well x


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## spooks

Congrats to cupcake

Congrats Marge 

and a very belated Congrats to Hak 
(and anyone else I missed  )


----------



## sweetdreams73

marge - huge congratulations to you and mr marge...       hope you and your lovely lucie are doing great, hugs for a quick recovery x


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## Lindz

Congratulations Marge and DH and DS. Love the name (DD's middle name)  

Hi to everyone else. Sorry I'm out of touch. Are Mini and Spooks next? Good luck!  

We're all good. Just a bit of a juggling act with babies and work. The house work which I didn't do when the babies were little really needs to get picked up again. DH gave twins dusters yesterday and showed them how to clean the coffee table so that's one option...


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah I'm next   Ds cleans the flOor for me


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## northernmonkey

Marge - congratulations on the arrival of your little girl, what a pretty name.  Hope you're recovering well.
Lindz - how on earth do you even manage to think about housework with twins!!!!
SD - hello!  Your boys are scrummy.   
ABC - good luck for scan on Friday, bet you can't wait.  where's that 20 weeks gone?
Pheobs - I had low lying placenta with dd1 which had moved up by 32 week scan.  Fingers crossed you'll be one of the majority whose moves up.
Thanks for all your good luck messages for my iui.  I was basted today and have had ovulation pains all afternoon so am feeling really happy about the timing.  But.... and I warn you this could be the most irrational question ever asked on this thread.... dd started with chickenpox today and although I've already had it, I'm worrying that because the virus lies dormant in your body, my immune system will somehow kick into action when I'm in contact with it again from dd and destroy any foreign body in its path, including an embryo.   See, I told you it was irrational and even as I read it back to myself I know I need to give myself a shake but now that the thought's there it's driving me a bit mad....  Please tell me I'm being completely ridiculous and that it won't have any effect on the outcome.  
hello to everyone else, hope everyone's well and enjoying the sunshine,


----------



## Fizzypop

Yes nm, give yourself a good talking too lol 


I can't remember the exact reasons why but I was in contact with someone who had c pox when I was pg and phoned midwife in a panic who said that if you've had it, there is nothing to worry about. Sorry cant remember exact details but do remember the important bit that it was okay   


Lindz - agree on housework. I struggle with baby and dog (does that count as twins   ), dog follows me around jumping at the Hoover and trying to play with it   and when he gets skitty, it makes DD skitty too


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Nm u are being ridiculous   Ds had c pox when I was 20wks.  I wasn't sure if I'd had it or not. So did bloods and I was immune.


----------



## northernmonkey

Hee hee thanks ladies.    looks like I won't have time to worry about anything else today, dd has woke up in a foul mood so she must be feeling a bit grotty bless her. I can't believe she's caught it-I think she got it from my friend's daughter and there were 3 days between them being together and the other girl's spots coming out so I didn't think she would be infectiou s then. I'm quite happy about it though, my eldest has already had it so we've got it over with now. 


Right best go get on with brekkie and get my Chris Evans radio fix. Have a good day everyone.


----------



## carrie lou

Hi NM, I think if you've definitely had chicken pox you will be immune so nothing to worry about as the other girls said. Hope DD feels better soon and     for this cycle


----------



## pheobs1

NM - sending you lots of positive sticky vibes!  Hope DD feels better soon xx

Mini - any signs yet? xx

Hope everyone is enjoying the lovely sunshine.  I am off sick at the moment and being very lazy, laying on the sofa in my pajamas! xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No signs.


----------



## pippilongstockings

Marge - congratulations! Great news, and a lovely name   

Mini - how far over will they let you go? I hope you manage to avoid induction but if not, try not to worry too much. I was on the drip for both labours and my first was horrible. Second time around was sooooo much easier. I was much more, um, "assertive" with how I wanted things to be second time round and it was nice and calm without anyone twittering around making a fuss    No pain relief needed either so it can't have been too bad cos I'm a real wimp! 2nd labours and births, even induced ones, are likely to be much easier    Enjoy the peace while it lasts!!

NM - good luck lovely. I'd be having the same panics if I was you but the fact is, there's nothing you can do about it so you might as well just try and relax! As for your little one, have you got some piriton and some Virasoothe? These got Luke through his CP. Luke hasn't started school yet (unfortunately!). He is so ready to go and has been for months but he's an early october baby so just missed the cut off. He's very very excited abotu starting big school in september though. There are only 9 in his year and he knows most of them already, as well as most of the year above so he'll have a whale of a time! How's your LO getting on?

Hats off to you twin mummies, you are amazing! I really struggled with going from 1 to 2 (although Z was a difficult so and so) so lords knows how you cope with 2 at once! And to the singleton mummies, you are doing a fab job too - it does get easier!   

Gotta get back to work now, the boss is cracking the whip! (DH!)
P x


----------



## carrie lou

Hello ladies  Hope you are all well.

I wondered if I could ask your opinions on something. You may remember  that I have a somewhat strained relationship with my in-laws. A couple of weekends ago, they came to visit for the first time in ages and FIL said something really nasty and hurtful that I can't seem to get out of my head. Full story here:
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=284114.0
if you can bear to read it  I just don't know if I'm reading too much into it and being over-sensitive because of the donor issue ... or if there really is a problem. I'd really appreciate your views as after all you ladies are all in the same position as me and I'd like to know what you would think or feel if it was you in my position. Thank you very much for tolerating my family dramas


----------



## pheobs1

Hi Carrie, I really can't believe your FIL    I know that I would have the exact same feelings in your situation.  I do also understand people suggesting to persevere with him for the sake of Zac, if you can indeed stomach it.  Is he usually a difficult person?  If he is, maybe it's just his attitude and nothing to do with the donor issue?  I know my SIL is a cow and I totally anticipate her being a cow when our little boy gets here, that's just her issue and nothing to do with us using a donor.   .  Did you have any issues with him before?
The long and the short of it is, I don't really have any wise words to say, just wanted to give you a   
xxx


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## teresal

carrie            we both have strange in laws


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pip - They are letting me go the usual 12 days over    Yes i feel more assertive this time. No one is going to put mini in the conrner    I did let one MW get to me tho, the other day. She was preaching to me about my ripped notes (DS got hold of them) it was only the front cover FFS! and it made me realise that i will not let anione speak to me like that again   

Carrie - i read your story the other day but didn't get chance to post.    Looking at it in another way, is he mentally well? Is he confused at all, like dementia?? Just trying to think of why he would say he has other grandchildren when he hasn't??!!


----------



## carrie lou

Thanks girls. Yes he is a very difficult man indeed and yes we have had numerous "issues" in the past, all to do with FIL not wanting to give up control over his sons. Most notably when we announced we were getting married, FIL threw a strop about DH "marrying outside the faith", stopped speaking to either of us, and said he wouldn't come to our wedding. Up until the very morning of our wedding neither of us knew whether he was coming or not. He did in the end but was such a miserable   the whole day that we wished he hadn't bothered. He has never apologised or even referred to his behaviour.


So that gives you a little taste of the sort of person he is. No there is no hint of dementia; he knows exactly what's what. He can be quite charming (not to me tho) when he wants to be. It's just when he's not getting his own way, he will say or do anything to hurt you even if it makes no sense whatsoever to anyone else. It's hard to describe exactly what a  he really is.


It crossed my mind that maybe he was referring to the grandchildren he hasn't got yet - from DH's two brothers - who would obviously be genetically "his" grandchildren. Perhaps he was trying to say these children will be more important to him than Zac.  


I know it seems extreme to say that I want nothing more to do with my  in-laws but things have deteriorated to the point that I actually had a panic attack that Saturday while waiting for them to arrive. The thought of having to see them made me that anxious. Is it any wonder I want to avoid them.


Mini - so your notes got ripped, so what Silly MW, get some perspective!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

He doesn't sound all there to me! What a kn0b!    sorry but i think you need to be really firm with him/them and tell them a few home truths, or get DH to do it. What does DH say? Sorry i haven't been back to your thread so i don't know what has been said. Don't repeat yourself if you've said same on your thread. 

Yeah front cover was ripped. They have to keep for 25 yrs you know


----------



## carrie lou

Has MW heard of sellotape?   


DH was furious with FIL after what he said and nearly ripped his head off. FIL was really taken aback cos no one usually stands up to him. But DH is still saying he wants FIL to be involved in Z's life. Personally if I never see either of those loonies again it will be too soon  I just think FIL has made it clear he's not bothered and we should stop banging our heads against a brick wall.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Selloptape was used       

I posted on your thread    Good that DH ripped his head off and that it took him aback. Sounds like he needs more of that treatment. He needs some very firm bounderies. I think you and DH need to write up a plan of what is acceptable and what isn't so it makes you be in control.


----------



## pippilongstockings

Carrie Lou - he sounds like a bully to me, plain and simple. I would deal with it by cool detachment. He's invited to family events but any bad behaviour and he is asked to leave. Any hint of nastiness towards Zac and he is asked to leave. No arguments or discussion. Don't lower yourself to his level by trying to work out what his problem is and talk him round, it won't work. This is the situation, you are very happy with it and with your beautiful son, if he doesnt like it that is unfortunate but it's HIS problem not yours. You can't force him to accept the situation so with this approach he will have to make the decision over whether to behave and see his family or misbehave and not be involved. I hope things improve, maybe it will just take time and assertive action from you and DH? Bullies need to be put in their place sometimes! For what it's worth I think Zac is gorgeous   


Mini - ugh, 12 days    Hopefully it won't come to that. Have you got a trampoline??


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Carrie I agree with pip. Firm boundaries and no messing about.


----------



## carrie lou

Pippi that was exactly what i needed to hear, thank you  It really helps to get some outside perspective though, to reassure me that I'm taking the right approach


Mini - hope you get some action soon


----------



## northernmonkey

Just giggling at carrie's last message to mini. In my house dh is talking about something completely different when he's hoping for some action.    Mind you they do say it can bring on labour... 




Carrie - how have you put up with your fil for so long!?  Pippi's advice sounds spot on, he'll be left in no doubt as to who's in charge for once! Sounds like he's hugely insecure underneath it all. 




Pippi- thanks for the chickenpox advice. Bought some of the gel earlier, dd screamed when I applied it round her groin-she has loads of spots there - but she seemed to like it on her back and tummy. Was about to give her some piriton until I read that it can make children excitable (is that technical term for hyper  ) so I'm leaving that til she's had her sleep cos I need my tea and chocolate break. 




Phoebs-sorry to hear you're not well, hope you're not feeling too grotty


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Piriton is meant to make them sleep  

No action here thank u!!   can't anyway cos of the Placenta


----------



## pheobs1

Carrie - I agree with the girls too ! xx

NM - hope DD is feeling better soon, I actually feel much better than I have in weeks, I am just welcoming the rest and feet up time!  Feel a bit naughty xx

Mini - no action for my DH either! ;-) xx

Hope everyone is well today, just had MW appointment and all looks good, nice regular heartbeat and my bp was great.  It's usually really high when I have it done in the hospital, because I think they make me a bit uptight but it's always great with the midwife!
xxx


----------



## pippilongstockings

Nm- piriton was brilliant when Luke had CP, he slept for hours! One of the main side effects for that class of drugs is drowsiness so I wouldn't be worrying about excitability! Luke had terrible CP spots round his groin. We found a cool bath helped. Hope she feels better soon   


Carrie - take no nonsense and he'll either back down completely when he realises he can't push you around or he'll stay away. It's a win-win situation   Good luck x


Mini - ugh, bonking is the last thing I felt like when I was full-term. To be honest, nothing really works, he'll come when he's ready or when he's forced out    Enjoy the calm, seriously, it's going to be chaos for the next few months!


Phoebs - sounds like you're doing well. Not too long to go now. My BP always played up at hospital too, "white coat" syndrome apparently.


Beautiful day here, we've spent a lot of it in the garden. Boys having a snooze and I really should wake them up or they'll not want to go to bed later. I'm enjoying the peace though......


----------



## carrie lou

Not quite what I meant    and it didn't work for me either  Z was just too comfy and stayed inside for an extra 2 weeks! Hopefully it won't be that long for you Mini...


Yep I thought Piriton made you sleepy too  


Pheobs my BP was up and down a bit towards the end but nothing major, if it's OK with the MW then I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. Glad everything was OK  


Gorgeous day here too. I'm trying to get organised cos we're off to Cornwall on Saturday for a week  but it's hard to get anything done with a 10 month old, at present he's trying to eat a recipe book so I'd better go put a stop to that...


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Piriton usually makes children sleepy, but can also cause irritability - their blood brain barrier is weaker than an adults and more drug may go across into the brain, it may have different reactions in some children.

Carrie - I have posted on your thread. One more thought - has FIL got a secret second family - the other grandchildren comment? Perhaps he was trying to let on after many years?


----------



## carrie lou

I'd love it if that was true! After a decade of him ranting on and on at us about what's "in his rule book" and what's not (e.g. living together before marriage). He was in the navy so DH sometimes jokes about him having a woman in every port. But seriously I very much doubt it. He's really not the type. Oh I would love that to be true. I'll have to broach it with DH and see what he says...


----------



## juju81

What on earths happened, I'm going I read carries link!

Walking for mile and sex brought on my labour 1 wk early! And pineapple, loads of! Oh and a curry that night too.....might of just been a coincidence but I'll never know ha ha


----------



## Spaykay

Quickie ...

MM- my 2nd indyction was abreeze! Acrually enjoyable!

CL - sorry ur going through this with FIL


----------



## ceci.bee

Mini - good luck!!! thinking of you and hope all goes smoothly and agreee with the oothers - get some rest as it is about to be chaos!!

CL OMG I can't believe your FIL, but totally agree with Pipi's advice about dealing with bullies. And you never know about the second family - it is always the 'rule book/stright up' sort of people who have that as a front to hide their own weaknesses.........enjoy Cornwall sounds like you need a holiday!

Re- piriton we used it for the first time to help Joshi with his jetlag on our california trip  - if he was already a bit sleepy he conked, but if not it made him totally hyper - which at 2am on a plane was not what we planned! amazing trip though and wedding fab - but california was freezing - not what I thought after years of watching california related tv shows!!   

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## sweetdreams73

hello ladies
pheobs - glad all going great and bp all ok   
mini - hope little one makes an appearance very soon     , hope all goes smoothly    

carrie -      fil !!!   wtf so sorry for what you are going through     , I also have a very insensitive FIL who totally struggles with the "donor" issue as he puts it!!  x  
pip - sounds like you had a lovely afternoon yesterday in the sun x  
hello and lots of      to everyone else

sweetdreams xxx


----------



## Spaykay

My MIL doesn't know about the donor egg. Just think she wouldn't understand. She's lovely, but old and getting dementiiur ( I think), so just no point in her kniwing. EG's cousins (33 and 35!) know and never even mention it. Some people's concepts are just so silly. Is it because it's a relatively new thi g or what? People just take adoption so naturaly, but a donor egg/sperm just opens questions. Well bums to those who have a problem. Their problem, not ours.

Sorry, didn't mean for that rant!

Saying that, my adopted friend's nan only bought gifts for her sister (naturally conceived) but not her...witch!

Kay xxx


----------



## pheobs1

Hiya ladies,

Sorry for the me post, can I ask some advice please.  TMI warning...

I feel fine today but earlier as I was walking to the toilet and i kind of felt that I was 'leaking a bit'?  When I looked I had like a creamy sort of discharge on my knickers, I had a wee and wiped it was a shiny cream/yellowy discharge.  I got up about an hour later and had the same feeling and there was a bit again but less.  I've just had a bath and am lying on the sofa, I am always super paranoid, is this normal or should I phone the midwife or something?  I've not told my mum or DH because I don't want them to worry when I may be over reacting!  Now afraid to get up and go to the toilett xxx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

It can be normal to have increased discharge in pregnancy. Is it itchy at all - if so it could be thrush?
I lost some of my mucus plug about 3 times in pregnancy and it had no effect. Midwife said it was normal and did not signify labour or anything and would regenerate.
Have you had any bleeding, waters leaking or cramps. If not then I am sure it is just secretions due to the increased oestrogens in pregnancy.
If you are worried, ring your midwife.


----------



## Fizzypop

Pheobs - it sounds normal to me but do speak to midwife if unsure xx


----------



## pheobs1

Hiya, no itching, bleeding or cramps. Seems to have stopped now 'touch wood'. does seem a bit mucusy to me. Bubs is mOving around too. If it cOmes back I will ring.
Thanks for the support and advice xxx


----------



## amandaloo

I was just about to answer the same as everyone else has done! Think its normal to have increased discharge in pg. But if your worried just give them a call im sure they get allsorts of calls. I know when i called the midwife once it set me at ease x


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks Amanda xxx


----------



## carrie lou

I was going to say the same, can be totally normal in pregnancy to have more discharge because of hormones!


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks for all the reassurance ladies.  Nothing afterwards.  Just trying to be bothered enough to wash my hair today!
xxx


----------



## speeder

phoebes - happened to me both times - huge amounts especially from second trimester. couple of times I wondered whether it was my waters breaking! also if you are hot then that doesn't help - sorry if tmi but you can sweat a lot - a lot! - when pg in your nether regions when pg x

carrie - will respond more shortly but I honestly cant fathom your parents in law and their appalling comments. sometimes I wonder if some people are just unpleasant by nature? they are lucky to have you and your beautiful little boy in their lives and I hope some time they realise that... x

mini - good luck - thinking of you xx

afm enjoying the sun - and a five minute tea break whilst dd1 is watching telly - needs must!! she won't nap so it's her only quiet time of the day. having awful in law problems of my own again which I will post about later x


----------



## Fizzypop

Speeder - another child that does not nap, yay! Saying that have managed to get dd to go down in her cot after lunch but I won't be counting any chickens yet!

Pheobs - should of said yesterday that I had loads too...

Carrie - was thinking the same as holly. I actually know someone that was living a double life, wife and 2 kids living where we are and then a girlfriend and 2 kids living a few hundred miles away. Wife found out recently and forgave him (although is living on anti-d's!) still not clear whether other women knows about wife. As far as we know he is still splitting his time between the two, lol!!!


----------



## pippilongstockings

Argh Phoebs, I remember that problem! Buckets of the stuff for weeks, it was gross! Don't panic, it really is normal. I used washable pant liners in 2nd and 3rd tri to mop up the goo - i found washable ones less irritating on the chuff. It looks very different to the mucous plug, that is more jelly-like. If it smells or is green, brown or red then definitely contact the midwife x


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi everyone,

Just a quick one to let you know that my 20 week scan went well today and we are having a wee girl. Delighted  

I've been really busy and I'm now about to go on holiday, but will be bck in a couple of weeks to catch up properly.

 to all. xx


----------



## carrie lou

Yay Abcd!!!     Congratulations hun    Have a lovely holiday


We are also off on our hols tomorrow (Cornwall) so will catch up with you lovely ladies when I get back


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I used to get the jelly stuff too.  Washable panty liners??!! Where from? How do they stick?  

Abc


----------



## Rachfins

Congrats on having a girl. Have a lovely holiday. 

Rach x


----------



## hakunamatata

abc another pink bump, yippee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## Lindz

Yey, great news abc


----------



## Spaykay

Abc - lovely news hun  

My mate just had her 2nd DE baby yesterday 

Kay xxx


----------



## pippilongstockings

Ooh lovely, a pink bump abc    


Mini - t'internet! They do up with poppers. I'm guessing you're not a Mooncup girl then?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Urrgghh No!     So if they do up with poppers do you have to have special knickers then?


----------



## juju81

Ahahahaha ahahahaha why would anyone choose a mooncup? 

Why not just buy tesco libbi ones 89p rofl


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Cos they're not environmentally friendly dope


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

OMG - I'd never heard of them and now I think I have heard everything.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## Spaykay

I've thought about them actually (to avoid certain "infections" down below)


----------



## juju81

Oh yeh. Although sorry, whether they are environmentally friendly or not there is no way I could use a mooncup      

Pippi how is ur website going anyway? Do u sell mooncups or just baby bits?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Are we talking moon cups or panty liners ?


----------



## juju81

I mean I don't care mooncups are environmentally friendly and panty liners aren't I could not use a mooncup! Surely it spills everywhere when u take it out?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

It sounds revolting to me - it suggests in the instruction leaflet that it can take 1oz of fluid and that you can remove it, wipe it with tissue and shove it back. Sounds lovely on a day out and only public toilets.


----------



## Fizzypop

Knowing my luck it would tip over and leak!!!


----------



## speeder

hey don't knock em till you try em girls! I used one for a few years - liked the idea of not chucking out towels. dead easy to use. let's just say dh was less than impressed when I used to boil it in the egg pan to sterilise it....I am a bit of a hippy chick at heart and dh not at all. he is still recovering!

what with my prolapse now my mooncup is no more.... 

I realise in this thread there is WAY too much information!!

also some women keep their blood collected in their mooncup for their plants. yuk!!!!!!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

That is almost as mad as fried placenta


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Think I'd rather have fried placenta


----------



## ceci.bee

am not suprised your DH was cheesed off with the egg pan tho!


----------



## Spaykay

Mooncup yes...placenta no blahhhhh

Kay xxx


----------



## amandaloo

Just had to google mooncups had no idea they existed


----------



## juju81

I'll leave the mooncups For you pippi, spay and speeder. I'll stick with my mate libbi thanks


----------



## speeder

fried placenta? I am looking at recipes for stir fried polenta - sounds waaaay too similar and its put me right off!

for some reason dh found my whole mooncup fad hilarious - no idea why but he used to howl "moooooooncup" out the car window when we drove around - like a demented wolf - which made me laugh so hard I woukd pee myself (and this was when I actually had a pelvic floor)

thanks pippi for making me giggle again!


----------



## speeder

juju - libbi?!?!


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Don't ask!  

I hate polenta


----------



## juju81

Never had polenta! Don't think I will now either 

Libbi are the name of tescos pant liners  

My pelvic floor is so much better. It's taken 2yrs tho!!


----------



## pheobs1

Wowzers, I'd never heard of mooncups either! You learn something new everyday!
Mini how you doing? Any movement?

Had a sneaky scan yesterday, saw a very nice cOnsultant, I told him I was anxious about movements, even though heart beat was great he got them to scan me. Our boy looks good, measuring bang on average for everything. I am 27 weeks and my placenta hasn't moved at all since 20 week scan. I've grown loads (got the stretch marks to prove it!). Back at 32 weeks to check but don't think it's going to move. 
Mini - what have they told you about yours? Mine is low lying anterior placenta reaching os? I've not been given any advice on no sex or taking it easy?
Had some protein in my urine yesterday too, consultant wanted extra checks done. Phoned today and they said tests look fine but no expination. They weren't all that nice in the antenatal day assessment unit. They were *****ing that the consultant shouldn't have sent me there, they didn't know what to do with my bloods, then when I phoned today for results she just said they would check, came back and said fine. So I'm a bit non the wiser? I feel fine so just gratful that our baby is looking healthy.

Hope you are all ok x x


----------



## Spaykay

Phiebs - glad your boy is doing well

Juju - what did u do to improve ur pelvic floor?

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pheobe mine is the same. It usually moves.  Mines not too bad. They are not sure if it's still
Low cos can't see it cos baby is too big.  I had to ask if there was anything I shouldn't be doing. She just said no sex.  If I  hadn't of asked then she wouldn't of said.  
They reckon
I can
Have natural labour but any bleeding then C section.  

Think things have started.   been having contractions reslly low down, not in tum tho? Is that contractions? I have no idea?!?!


----------



## pheobs1

Whow Mini - here you go then!  How exciting/scary?  Is it easier or worse knowing whats coming?!

I wish I'd asked now too, I googled and it's not a good thing to do!  

Wishing you loads of luck xxxxx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Mini - how exciting - best of luck and wait to hear the news!

Phoebs - lovely that baby is doing so well.

By chance I saw mooncups in Boots today - would not have noticed them if it was not for here. £22   
And TWO sizes     

How the h£ll do you know what size?


----------



## Spaykay

MM - no idea as was always induced!! Good luck!

I guess girl's who've had vaginal births would need the bigger mooncup size?

Kay xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Mini - although I was induced, mine started as period pains down below. Fingers crossed he's on his way xxx


Kay - hehe v funny x


Pheobs - yep, sometimes you feel like you have to extract. Mine always told me something different each time!


----------



## ceci.bee

good luck Mini thinking of you!!!!                      hope it all goes smoothly

Phoebs sorry to hear your placenta hasn't moved but fab your boy is looking so great for dates. I would not worry too much about your low lying placenta - as in my experience of having a bad previa they gave me endless lectures about no sex, staying with someone all the time, carrying  my notes everywhere, charging my phone always etx and planning for CS and admission and emergency hysterectomy etx- so if they are not doing that to you then they think it will move and like Mini you should be fine so don't worry too much and stay away from google!!
27 weeks is a fab gestation enjoy

hmmmm am getting seriously broody with all the pregnancy and birth talk (don't need much prompting these days) - wish sometimes that we didn't have to factor money and logistics ++ (esp when living in Africa where there is no IF treatment!) when thinking about family planning - hey ho I just have to wait and save for now   

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Spay, just did pelvic floors and time really. If I have a really bad cold/cough then sometimes get a bit of dribble but it's soooooooo much better!

Phoebs I'd lay of the sex! I don't know anything about it tho!

Miniiiiiiiiii keep me posted biatch


----------



## pheobs1

Thanks girls, been a sex free zone since 20 weeks, TBH I was glad of the excuse! However I am finding myself a little randy!
I'm a bit anal and take my notes everywhere with me anyway, had great news today, I can finish work at 32 weeks, so just 5 weeks when I go back to work! Oh my lord I still can't believe how lucky I am and that I'm going to be someone's mummy! DH is busy painting the nursery, I'm banned from seeing it until it's finished 

Hole your doing ok MM x


----------



## juju81

Aww Phoebs that's such a nice thing for ur hubby to do    I have to say cupcakes nursery is beautiful. Infact Lilly is beautiful.

Have u thought of names?

Minis gone in I hospital


----------



## Spaykay

Mini's in hospital? That's very exciting!

DH had nothing to do with the kid's rooms  alllll meeeeee! I got my mum to paint murals.

Kay xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Oooh, not long now then. What is it about labour starting at night! 


Same here - me and mum did the nursery. Dh hates decorating. But he is about to embark on a redesign of the garden so can't complain. We are hiring diggers and skips


----------



## pheobs1

Oh well fizzy that explains why he wants to be involved, diggers and skips,  every mans dream!
DH has banned me from looking in the room until he has finished!

Ju we have two names. We are saying one of them when people ask his name, but still open minded about the other, see what he looks like!

Oh wow, wishing mini loads of luck xxx


----------



## Lindz

Woo, wishing Mini lots of luck. Wil be checking for news. Keep us informed Ju!! X


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Blue one. Born 201am. Quick painful labour    7lb12   had epidural in the end after lots of swearing and ventous


----------



## pheobs1

Yeah! Big congratulations Mini, well done you. Another beautiful boy! Xxx
How are you feeling, exhausted I should imagine! Xxx


----------



## Spaykay

Well done Mini! Taking it u had a natural birth  Hope you're both well. Great weight. 

Kay xxx


----------



## Fizzypop

Blimey that was quick! Huge congrats, hope you are both well xxx although quick and painful sounds already like its a lot better than last time?


----------



## *ALF*

Congratulations Mini, DH and L


----------



## ceci.bee

fabulous news Mini am so chuffed for you and so quick as well! hope you are recovering and you didn't bleed or have any of the probs with the last delivery enjoy   
xx


----------



## Rachfins

Congratulations mini on your baby boy. That was quick.         x


----------



## teresal

congratulations Mini mooo,     big hugs from all here


----------



## Lindz

Huge congrats to Mini, DH and L. Well done. Hope you're all doing well xx


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Fabulous news Mini


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

THanks  all  

I didn't realise I was in labour at home   I cooked tea and had lunch with a friend


----------



## amandaloo

Bloomin eck I've not read the thread for 2 days and mighymini's news . Many congratulations


----------



## pippilongstockings

I can't believe you are on t'internet and not asleep!! Rest up love   


Congrats again, having 2 boys is ace


----------



## juju81

Id love another boy


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I'd love another baby, any variety


----------



## Fizzypop

Me too. Just watching one born every minute


----------



## chrispx

Congrats mini on the birth of your baby boy. Hope all well, been keeping eye out for your news. Well done. x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

I'm on my phone is hospital.  No chance of any sleep here!!!


----------



## spooks

CONGRATS MINI


----------



## ceci.bee

also broody would love another baby any colour! Sorry hospital busy Min but sounds like you are recovering well and not in HDU/aany other complications?? congrats again! xx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

No complications.  He poo'd inside do had to monitor him for 24hrs. 

He's a little   with feeding tho


----------



## speeder

yay mini - congratulations on the arrival of little blue mini!! you are funnyv  hope you get home soon and escape the racket.... xxxxx


----------



## speeder

ps is Everyone on this board broody?!?  I am horribly broody which amazes me given I am nackered!


----------



## northernmonkey

Yay! Congratulations Mini, hope you and baby are doing well. 

I've lost track of who's next, is it you Spooks??


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Yeah spooks is next. 

I'm not broody


----------



## Lindz

I'm very very not broody but then just watched One Born on catch up and DH said no more for us and I'm not quite ready to say that....! Only ONE more though. 

Mini- hope feeding gets better. Is he just not taking much? 
X


----------



## spooks

I'm broody for another one already       
(but TTC baby 3 would be so complicated for a whole range of reasons - think it's why I want another - I'm just so stubborn) 
 take care all and I'll keep you posted of any news


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Mini - give it about 3-4 weeks


----------



## northernmonkey

Ladies is anyone there, I need advice!!!! My otd is Monday and I've stupidly done the test this morning that the hossie gave me. I've never tested early before but we're at my mum's for the weekend, my family don't know we're having more tx, I was 100% convinced that it hadn't worked and i just wanted proof so i could forget it for the rest of the weekend. But now I've got a faint blue line. I mean really faint, but surely there would be no line at all if it was negative? Oh bugger why didn't I just wait.


----------



## Fizzypop

Well you know what they say NM...any type of blue line is a line 


I'm sure when everyone's up and about you will have enough distraction from it? Now stay away from the pee sticks till Monday............      


Congrats


----------



## northernmonkey

Could it be an evaporation line? Whatever that is!!!


----------



## northernmonkey

Ps thank you!!!


----------



## *ALF*

How many days are you post insem?
Did you do a trigger shot? How many days post that?
Sorry don't really know about evaporation lines.




P.s. definately not broody!!


----------



## northernmonkey

My trigger was 2 weeks ago today and I'm 12 days post iui.


----------



## pippilongstockings

Ooh NM! I'm a serial early tester    so I've done plenty of reading about evap lines etc. Evap lines tend to be colourless not pink/blue (depending on test) so if it has any colour in it then it's probably not an evap line. It could possibly be from the trigger shot but after 12 days that should all be out of your system - do you have the details of your dose? 


Sounds positive to me NM, but all you can do is buy 20 tests and test every time you go to the loo like I used to


----------



## pippilongstockings

Mini - have you got a name yet? Congrats for escaping hospital - is it any quieter at home?!


----------



## pippilongstockings

Btw I'm very broody, would love another. Have I mentioned that before?? Don't think it ever goes away......


----------



## northernmonkey

No was definitely blue so that rules out an evap line. Trigger 14 days ago so that should be gone. Will buy another test today and try to hold out til Monday. I just don't have a good feeling about it-no symptoms whatsoever and have convinced myself that perhaps implantation started but hasn't continued. Did you not drive yourself mad testing early!!!! 

Thanks for your replies ladies.


----------



## *ALF*

Trigger shot goes after 10 days so def not that. Sounds like it could well be an early positive (12 days is pretty early!). Can you or DH subtly get another test today? I'd definately be doing another test tomorrow.
Sorry brief am on phone.


----------



## juju81

NM I tested positive 2days early with Noah and was convinced I was going I see a negative!

Sounds like a bfP to me......and screw the Pee stick police, go gets digi one where it say it in black and white


----------



## Spaykay

NM - I never had symptoms hun ((())) Why not try ckearblue...no lines there to fool you! Sounds like you've got a positive to me 

Kay xxx


----------



## pheobs1

My name is pheobs and I'm a testaholic!

Yes I tested really early everytime and yes it drove me insane! Everytime I got a bfn there was never any hint of a line at all, no matter how much I squinted! With my bfp I got the faintest of lines from 10 days post ET.

I think it's a positive, the clinics seem to give otd's a short time after when you'd see a result, just to be sure I suppose. So your o my two days early. A line is a line... In my humble opinion.

Xxxxx


----------



## *ALF*

NM - sounds like the consensus is to go and get another test, or 2 or 3........ Will be watching for news tomorrow.........


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Positive is positive - the hospital test ON OTD for Charley was the faintest line possible. That time I dipped the clear blue digital in the pee at the same time as I could not stand the uncertainty of those [email protected] clinic tests and got positive 1-2 weeks.

If you read it in the time specified in the packet and not later it is a true positive.

The trigger shot is usually out of everybody's system 10 days after, but we say 14 days post trigger for testing to be absolutely sure.

Many people have no symptoms at all. I felt exactly the same whether pregnant or not cycles. The only thing I had with Charley was a strong sense of smell and when cleaning the toilet once a couple of days before testing I retched at the smell of bleach.


----------



## northernmonkey

Thanks ladies, you have really helped. I only had the 5000iu trigger so I think that should be well and truly out of my system by now. I'm starting to believe I could actually be pregnant.    will keep you informed....


----------



## amandaloo

NM - have you done a test today?? Think i tested 2 days early  and got a BFP and now have DS


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Amanda - love your picture!
C has the exact same outfit!

Here are some latest pictures of C.
Not sure if I have posted the Feb lot before, apologies if I have.
In the March set there is one of one of my ''other babies''

http://photobucket.com/babyfeb12
password babyfeb12

http://photobucket.com/babymar12
password babymar12

/links


----------



## sweetdreams73

mini - huge huge congratulations     , cant wait to see some pics... hope the feeding improves..x   

Northern monkey - sounds rather like a BFP to me...     the hsp did a test for me 6 days after my ET (so 11 days after EC ) and it was a positive..very faint line but a positive and now I have two beautiful cheeky boys!!

misteletoe - love your pics...adorable xx  

pippi - hope all great with your lovely boys? I am very very broody!! DH has said we definitely cant have anymore  , even though we have 6 x frozen 5 day blasts in the freezer at our fertility clinic..but I am hoping he might change his mind when the boys are a bit older...who knows!! xx  

lindz - only one more   !! thats what I keep saying!! you dont fancy two sets of TWINS then!!   although who knows with my track record...only one embie transferred and splitting into two I could easily have another set of twins!!! OMG!!x  

hello to everyone else lots of    
Happy Easter to you all, hope you all have a lovely weekend      

hugs    sweetdreamsxxx


----------



## northernmonkey

SD- I must admit I'm slightly nervous because I had 2 follies so twins is a possibility...  Have bought a clear blue to test again tomorrow.  Perhaps when your little boys start asking for a baby brother or sister your dh will be swayed towards another...


----------



## pheobs1

NM - also just remembered the clinic test was a really really faint line, so I used a first response and it was a clear line xxx


----------



## Lindz

NM sounds good to me. My line was so faint I dismissed as BFN until DH said there was sort of a line if you held it to the light!   day after (oTD) line was still faint do did clear blue digital which came up as Pregnant 1-2 weeks. And that was with twins and testing later than you! Good luck tomorrow! Oh, I had no symptoms  either

SD- I know! Just don't think we could cope with more twins. Not sure how to minimise the risk with future treatment either. I'd still need clomid and there would probably still be more than one folicle so there would be that change again (not to scare NM  ).


----------



## carrie lou

Hi everyone   

Mini -   on the arrival of your little boy    Hope everything is going well  

NM - sounds like a BFP to me! Any line is a positive and you're only 2 days from OTD... I tested one day early with Z and got a very definite positive. Will keep my fingers crossed for you but it sounds promising     The only symptoms I had that early were feeling a little bloated and as if AF was on its way. The "proper" pregnancy symptoms didn't kick in until about 6 weeks.

Holly - lovely photos, Charley looks like a little cutie   

Pheobs great to hear that your little boy is doing so well. Don't know much about low lying placenta myself but if they haven't given you any specific advice then I suppose that is reassuring?   

Talking about broodiness ... yes I am SO broody as well, I would love another baby of either colour  I'm not fussy! Have already started saving for next round of treatment, all being well we hope to go again in December this year or maybe early next year  

Hope everyone is well. We have just got back from a week in Cornwall, weather was OK and we all ate far too many pasties  Z even tried one as well. Stopped off at my parents' house in Devon on the way home, my brother, sister and BIL are all there as well for Easter and it was so lovely to see how they all dote on Z (he is the first baby in the family). Makes me a little worried for the next baby cos I'm sure s/he won't get this much attention!


----------



## juju81

NM try not to panic too much about twins, I had 3 follies and only 1 bubba...ignore Lindz and SD  

Can't believe ur having a 3rd. Ur nuts lol


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥




----------



## northernmonkey

Pregnant 1-2 weeks!!!! Going to be a fun christmas as my due date is 19th december... Just keep reminding me that you only got the one from 3 follies Ju! And if you're in touch with cupcake can you please pass on a huge thank you from me for recommending her fab clinic. 


Carrie Lou- glad you had a good hol. I love Devon and Cornwall, we've had some lovely hols there. We've just bought a fab new tent so will hopefully be spending more time there this year. Whereabouts did you go? 


Right, off to hide some choccies in the garden for the girls. Although I always seem to end up eating more of it than they do, I think they just like the fun of the hunt!


----------



## carrie lou

NM         Excellent news  


We went to Looe in SE Cornwall. It's a very nice town and close to Polperro which is lovely too  


Happy Easter everyone


----------



## Fizzypop

Congrats NM 


Can't wait for next year and hiding Easter eggs in the garden  DD seems a bit unimpressed with Easter this year!


----------



## pheobs1

Huge congratulations NM! Wow number three! Hiding eggs in the garden sounds fabulous, can't wait to start doin that! Xx


----------



## juju81

Whoooo hoooo NM, congrats hun. Yep I'm in contact with cupcake, will pass on ur news


----------



## *ALF*

NM - huge congratulations!!!!!

Have also been hiding eggs in the garden!!!!


----------



## amandaloo

Nm- fabulous news got a very big smile on my face for you 

To all the other broody ladies YES I Am too  have been rerefered back to my clinic hoping to have FET later this year


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

NM - huge congrats!            
Your Easter egg (s) weren't hiding!


----------



## teresal

congratulations NM, i wish you well for the next 8 months xxxx


----------



## juju81

Can I just ask those who have had more than one brought treatment......did u find he to as stressful and then the preg?

I spent my whole pregnancy absolutely sh*t scared something was gonna go wrong and I just don't wanna feel like that again. Or do u genuinely not have time to stress? There's other no no's for me too tho and not sure I'll ever really change my mind but on the other hand I'm not sure I'm 100% done yet


----------



## northernmonkey

Thanks for the congrats ladies, it hasn't quite sunk in yet. 

Juju- I found tx for #2 more stressful in some ways because I was desperate to give #1 a sibling. I was a nervous wreck until 8 week scan then was fine. During tx I would feel really guilty because I was so distracted by it all and worried that I was neglecting dd#1.  In hindsight though it was all so worth it and I think if you don't feel done then go for it! Sorry it's a bit of a short reply but I'm on phone and can't type easily!


----------



## ladybird73

Hi there

I was wondering if I could join you.  Hubby and have been advised that we need to use donor eggs due to my quality but also have a chromosome issue.  We have been given funding and we have our donor so we are just waiting for some blood works for PGD so hopefully will get going in July time.

Am I in the right place?  

Thank you

V xx


----------



## Rachfins

NM - Congrats on the BFP. 

ladybird - Sorry about your news but this thread is for people pregnant or who have had babies after using a donor. I think you'll be better for support somewhere in the donor egg area. http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=551.0


----------



## Spaykay

NM - wooohoooo!!!

Juju - I didn't worry half as much with 2nd pg, but it was natural so I missed the first 6 weeks, then pressumed I'd misscarry anyway, then just didn't have time to orry as much. Also, if I'd lost A, it would not have meant losing motherhood if that makes sense. Devistating but not life hanging.

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Nm congrats hun.  

Ju I felt the same as spay. Once you get the bfp you really don't have time to think like u did with the first.  I also thought id miscarry but couldn't sit and be sorry for myself as I had ds to think about.  U know how quick my pg went


----------



## Spaykay

Mini - needing a new ticker 

Kay xxx


----------



## hakunamatata

nm absoluttely fabulous to see your news yippee, bring on baby number three                          
sorry ive gone quiet hubby passed on his bad chest and flu thing to addi and i. not sure i might need him to take leave tomorrow to look after us, its not a goodun x


----------



## Rachfins

Welcome back Cupcake. It's lovely to read your post. Really glad that after all the stress of tx and worrying during pregnancy, everything went so perfectly for you. 

Thank you for the congratulations. It's my 20 week scan tomorrow morning. 

Rach x


----------



## carrie lou

Cupcake's back!!!     Lovely to hear from you hun, we have missed you and I never stopped wondering how you were getting on! 


Rachfins good luck for your scan tomorrow   Are you going to find out the sex?


----------



## northernmonkey

Welcome back Cupcake, it's great to hear from you. So pleased to hear how much you're enjoying your beautiful little girl and that she was worth all the worry.  Yes, do PM me! But thanks again for recommending complete-I obviously couldn't be happier with them! Especially Jane, she's sooo lovely. 


Rachfins - hope your scan goes well tomorrow. 


Ju- happy birthday!


----------



## northernmonkey

Ps can anyone remind me how to do a ticker


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hi Cupcake - (its HH - I changed my name at Christmas!) wonderful news! Glad to see you back. It is a worrying and anxious time, but now she is here! All the new worries start now!

You are not the only one who wants to do it all again. I think most of us on here are broody!

Don't worry about combo feeding. We have been doing it for nearly 10 months now. You know what happened to us in the beginning so I won't bore you again, but if anyone had reason to give up BF it was me. I still feed twice a day and still have milk available. Others can join in with feeding. I know my Dad loves giving a bottle.
No need for any guilt!

Rachifins - good luck. Can't wait to hear news!

NM - just click on one of mine and it will take you to Lillypie - then go through the sequence and at the end use the snippet that is pseudoHTML to copy into your signature in the profile section.


----------



## northernmonkey

Thanks Mistletoe. x


----------



## Rachfins

Hello

Thanks for the good luck messages.

Scan went really well. Everything was fine and in the right place. It was fabulous seeing the little one again, it looked so cute. It even looked like it was sucking it's thumb at one point. We now have some lovely photos as well. We decided not to find out what sex it is and wait for a surprise.  

Consultant said that we need another scan at 28 weeks due to using fertility tx. Decided not to say it was Unmedicated DIUI. It can't harm to have another scan. Also, one at 34 weeks to see if fibroid has affected anything.

I can't believe that I am 20 weeks today and have got to the halfway mark already.

Rach x


----------



## ceci.bee

yay Rach you have got safely to 20 weeks that is such a lovely scan enjoy


----------



## carrie lou

Rach that's great news hun  I remember my 20 week scan with Z, he was also sucking his thumb. Such a precious time.  


Ceci - was just thinking of you and how tomorrow is Joshi's birthday! Can't believe he is 1 already, nor can I believe my own baby will be 1 in just 6 weeks time


----------



## pheobs1

Fabulous news on your scan Rach, thrilled for you. I felt like the time dragged waitiv for twenty weeks, then it flys! 

Wow Ceci I can't believe Josh is 1 tomorrow, and Zac too Carie!

First day back in work today after two weeks off, so I'm pooped!!! Xxx


----------



## Rachfins

Thank you ladies.

Ceci - I can't believe Josh will be 1 tomorrow. Where has that year gone too?

Rach x


----------



## amandaloo

Ceci - happy birthday to J Tommorow 

Rachfins - lovely to hear scan went well and nice to have a surprise x


----------



## northernmonkey

Rachfins- great news about your scan, bet you can't wait to see baby again at the next one. 


Ceci- enjoy Joshi's 1st birthday, hope you all have a wonderful day. 


Phoebs- only 3 days left until the weekend


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## ceci.bee

Thank NM - he is already being showered in presents and excitement, and that was at 7.30 this am!!!    am loving it but it seems this year has gone by soooooooooooooo fast - does it get faster with more babies??


----------



## pheobs1

Happy Birthday Joshi !

NM I slept for an hour when I got in last night! Got cheeky half day today, midwife this afternoon to check urine and bp - sad that I'm glad to have a reason to go home to bed! Xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Happy birthday joshi.   

Yes it gets quicker with more than 1. Samuel is a wk old today


----------



## carrie lou

Joshi! Hope you are all having a wonderful day. Doesn't seem like 5 minutes since we were bump buddies


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Lovely name Mini -     

Happy Birthday to you Joshi


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## Fizzypop

Happy first birthday joshi! Hope you all have a good day x


Mini - cant believe he is a week old already! Hope feeding is better now?


DD was 7 months yesterday. Still a while before back to work though...Carrie, are you back yet/soon?


----------



## Rachfins

Happy Birthday Joshi. Have a wonderful day and enjoy all the fuss and presents.
  

Mini - Samuel is a lovely name. A week old already!

Rach x


----------



## teresal

Happy Birthday Joshi     where has that year gone, can't believe he's 1 already   

xx


----------



## carrie lou

Fizzy - nope, was supposed to go back last week but decided I couldn't face the 13 hour shifts and boss who hates me  so I resigned!  Now looking for something a little more family friendly  


Mini - how are things going?


----------



## northernmonkey

Teresa- how are you? Have you seen Marge since she had #2? 


Mini- I love the name Samuel too. How you feeling? 


Phoebs - get all the sleep you can while you get the chance! Have you decided when you'll finish work or are you just going to see how it goes? 


Ceci - aahhh, 1st birthdays are so special. Yes it definitely goes quicker with more than one- I can't believe my youngest will be 2 next week.    


Rachfins - had your placenta moved up at the scan?


Carrie- good luck with the job hunt. What do you fancy doing or do you not mind as long as the hours suit?


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Carrie - are you still considering childminding?

I have just had a shock phonecall with the boss. She has said that she might be able to offer me 3 days a week at my grade, but in a different specialty.
Oh what to do!?
I have to think about it. It could be an opportunity to get some amazing experience in a new specialty, but I will be leaving behind my expertise in an area I love and have worked in for 10 years.
But then otherwise I have to come back to a team who have been acting up in my absence and it might be difficult for me to cope with them all having been in my job or higher grades while I've been off. Maybe it would be better to be in another team? At least I wouldn't have to work with the person in my team who bullies me. A fresh start?


----------



## Spaykay

Happy birthday Joshi. 

Yes...DS is half a year alreadyvand it seems like yesterday. Thought I'd be getting moe sleep by now though! Ha ha!

Kay xxx


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Kay oh don't  tell me that   

Holly fresh start sounds nice.  I found it really hard going back and finding stuff that should of been done in my absence not done.  It took a whole month to settle in again. To the point where I had no interest in the job then when I finally got my head around it again I became pg and had to become office based so it meant I wasn't doing my full job again  

Thanks for comments on the name.  It til a while to decide   his full name is Samuel Louis.  I don't want it changed to Sam or SAMMY so will have to keep
Reminding people


----------



## sweetdreams73

happy birthday joshi  ,     hope you have a wonderful day, lots of love and hugs, sweetdreams and matthew and daniel xxxxx

mini - such a lovely name,hope all going great    x

rach - glad all great with your scan   x

carrie - hope you find a lovely job where they appreciate you and sympathetic to having a family x  

fizzy - wow 7 months already...I am so glad I am not going back to work...the cost of having two babies in childcare costs so much that its not worth me working as all money would go on that and very little left over...not easy, glad you still have more maternity leave left, enjoy!! x  

misletoe - hope you manage to decide what to do about your job x  

hello to everyone else    

AFM - We had a lovely long easter weekend with the boys and DH, we stayed with my brother and his wife down in sussex and the boys were so so good, settled really well, very happy and slept well at night, just woke a couple of times during the night as they have a cold and a nasty cough which wakes them up but soon settled straight back to sleep... was lovely to get away from home and have a break and also lovely to know that the boys can cope with not being in their bed hse etc...so good practice for our holiday in july...the boys are now 8 months old, can not believe the time goes so quick... they are such lovely boys, its hard work and the days fly by but its all worth it as so so rewarding!! 

lots of love
sweetdreams xxx


----------



## northernmonkey

Mistletoe - sounds a tricky one.  It always feels safer to stick with what we know, but further down the line would you regret saying no to a new opportunity? Can you see yourself staying where you are for the rest of your career?  If you took the new role would it be difficult to move back to what you do currently if you decided that was what you preferred?


----------



## carrie lou

Holly - yes I'm still thinking about childminding but not entirely sure. I missed the introductory course a few weeks ago cos I was ill, booked to go on the next one but it's not until mid May so I thought in the meantime I'd have a look what was available in my old line of work. Hoping for something part time which would still pay better than childminding. Anything more than about 3 days a week wouldn't be worthwhile though cos of childcare costs  Just got to hope something comes up!


Has anyone's little one had slapped cheek disease? I think Z has it


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

My friends little girl had it.


----------



## ceci.bee

Thanks all for the birthday wishes - we had such a lovely day yesterday and was totally out of it in a meeting wiht my boss in the morning thinking about how to ice the cake before the party started!

Mistletoe I think a fresh team sounds like a good idea - you don't want to go back to working with a bully and a new specialty will give you soemthing to get your teeth into to help you in the transition.

Mini love the name - our second choice boy's name after Joshi - it has a real ring about it, but you will struggle to stop the Sam's I think......  

lots of love to all
Ceci


----------



## speeder

gosh, I don't log in for a few days and LOADs of updates!

Mini - I love the name - I promise to remember not to shorten it.    Hope you are getting even a little sleep?!   

Huge happy birthday to Joshi    it seems like yesterday to me you were born!

Carrie and Teresa - love the new pics of your little ones   

Hi SweetDreams - your little boys just sound a delight. Where are you off to in July?

Mistletoe - it's a hard one. I don't know if my experience might help but just in case it does....  When I was on mat leave my company was sold and I was offered a position in a new team in a different part of the organisation.  I have to say the fresh start, on the whole, was really good for me.  I felt ready for a new challenge and a change (and I'm not really someone who likes change much). But, that said, I was very very tired when I first went back and so having a new job made that harder in some respects.  Plus going back to work is hard enough after mat leave, but going back to a new job and new team is that little bit tougher.  But in the long run, for me, I was glad it had happened that way.  Plus, for me, WHO I work with is so important and if someone is bullying you - well that is awful so maybe a new job away from said bully could be a good idea?   

NM- HUGE congratulations on your BFP and I wish you a healthy happy pregnancy!  You are one lucky lady!   

Kay - sorry you ain't getting more sleep.  DD2 was having me up 5 times a night and was sooooo tired I was living on chocolate (NOT good for my bikini diet as hols in 6 weeks) so I bought the Baby Whisperer book and took some tips.  Have to say it's really really worked and I'm not back to one night feed.....which I can cope with.  

Rach - wonderful about the scan and I like surprises too!  Weird the consultant offers an extra scan (great to get it though). 

Hello to everyone else - sorry if I've missed anyone...

AFM - all good here. We had a lovely Easter hiding eggs for DD2 in the garden who really "gets" Easter now. I'm so in love with my little girls it almost scares me - my anxiety is much much better but lurking below the surface in a kind of "I'm so happy this can't last, oh what is round the corner" way.  Sometimes I swear I wish I had a different head and didn't think about stuff so much...  

Anyone got any views on early weaning?  I started DD1 on solids at 4 months on the direction of her doctor due to weight gain issues - so that decision was made for me.  This time, though, DD2's weight is fine but she is a very hungry solely breast fed baby who I feel is ready for solids already (17 weeks).  I know current advice is not to wean until 6 months but then a study came out suggesting that this late weaning could be contributing to allergies.  Plus I feel DD2 is needing more...  V interested in views on this one!

lots of love speeder x


----------



## *ALF*

Speeder - I started weaning DD at 17 weeks cos she needed something more. You know your DD best and if you think she needs some more then I don't think you can do any harm offering her something now, you'll soon see if she's interested or not. Is she showing other signs of being ready, watching you eat etc. Just my opinion but I think 6 months is late for lots of babies ..

Ceci - glad Joshi had a great birthday!

Mini - lovely name, was one of my options.

Love to all
Alf


----------



## carrie lou

Speeder we started weaning Z at just before 5 months. In hindsight I realise he didn't actually "need" solid food that early so if I could do it again I'd probably wait a bit longer and do BLW (which is what we are doing now, by and large) from the start - it's so much less hassle than making purees! Also starting solids made no difference to his sleep and he didn't start dropping milk feeds until after 6 months. BUT every baby is different and as ALF says you are the best person to judge.


----------



## Spaykay

Speeder - I weaned both at 4 months. DD loved it, DS still doens't particulary like being fed...I think he wants to do baby led weaning which I really don't want to do  As for sleep .  the baby whisperer has worked for naps etc and going down to bed inicially, but she suggests popping a dummy in instead of boob when waking and letting them suck to sleep instead of boob to sleep....but DS won't take a dummy! have I interpreted it wrong? Mind you, we've had 2 nights of only 1 wake. Still pooped as DD was up and I was awake thinking what to do if DS woke before 7 am, which he didn't. They'll be up early tomorrow though as it's Sat and I don't have to get up!

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

speeder - I waited til 6 months to wean. We did BLW too. No purees at all. We have no allergies here, i even tried peanut butter at 6 mths and he was fine.    comparing to other babies it made no difference to sleep weaning or no weaning. 

Kay - I used a dummy to suck to sleep instead of a bottle in the night with DS1, it worked as it weaned him off the night feeds. But then he kept waking up looking for the dummy and we had to get rid of it at 4mths. It was the start of my PND    

DS2 has a dummy to help him get to the next feed if he is getting grouchy or if i can;t sort him out there and then    i try not to use it for sleep but in the night i have just to get some sleep myself


----------



## Spaykay

MM - if I had^PND this time like last time, I'd be screwed!!!

DD gone to bed much better tonight!!! Let's see if she satys there alllll night. As I imaginged, both woke at 7 am just to pee me off this morning and DD has been a pain in the **** allllll day! Thank goodness they're down...but forf how long?

Kay xxx


----------



## speeder

thanks all...

Carrie - re the BLW - what were good first foods for that?  DD2 is still only little - 17 weeks so probably not up to holding and eating with food yet.  I'm weaning early because I weaned DD1 early (we had to on advice from her paed due to weight gain issues) and also because of that study suggesting later weaning might cause allergies not prevent them.  It's a tough one - I kind of feel I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't! 

Kay - just when I said baby whisperer has worked really well for us DD2 has started sleeping even worse then ever!  Last night I fed her at 11pm, 1am, 3am and 5am. That was after having solids yesterday day too so mmm clearly that made things worse not better!  It's like she is permanently starving    

Kay, MM - I tried the dummy at night method too, to stretch out night feeds and all that happened was she kept waking wanting the dummy so I ditched it too...

Just goes to show that every baby is different as DD1 never relied on the dummy that way and, by about 3 weeks was only waking once in the night for feeds.  

If I figure a way to improve DD2's sleep I'll let you know!  Might try gin and tonic and see if that goes through the breast milk. 

DD1 went into her big girl's bed tonight .  I tucked her up under her downie and she is fast asleep, so adorable that I want to sleep in the same bed as her tonight...

Kay - did you buy a new mattress for your second child?  Realised I haven't and will probably have to...

speeder x


----------



## juju81

Speeder, I dont think you can do BLW before 6 months because their gag reflex hasnt kicked in enough and they wont know how to swallow or choke it back up..!  I tried Noah on purees about 17wks, he wasnt interested so left it then started againa few wks later.  He was fine, I then introduced BLW at 6 months combined with purees just so I knew he was getting something.  He's never been a big eater tho.  He goes some days without eating hardly anything, nibbling at bits or literally turning his nose up at everything apart from milk.  I just go with it cos he'll then not stop eating for days!  He's only a slight little thing tho and they recommend stopping full fat milk at 2 cos of the fat content but were carrying on!


Cupcake, yay, my perseverance paid off...your back    


Ceci, happy belated birthday to Josh     did you do anything nice?


Mini    (think of it as the finger one)


Hello everyone else, 


Ijust spent a lovely week down in Dorset, sunshine all week.  Noah loved it, loved roaming free, we didnt use his pushchair all week but hes safely back in it now...I'm not ready to give it up completely, we only didnt use it because we were so close to everything! Birthday last monday was quiet, boring and a bit disappointing.  We've no money because Nicks out of work and we only went away because it was booked last year     hopefully he'll make it up to me when he's back working again...cons appoint 2/5.  Am going to contact my clinic on tuesday.  See if what I need to do...have a feeling there/'ll want all my bloodytests done again which is what costs the money     I'm still not 100% convinced I want another tbh, feel like i'm doing it more for Nick & Noah but I'll give it my all regardless


----------



## abcdefgh

Hi everyone, lots been going on while I was away on holiday!

Mini - Congratualtions on the birth of baby Samuel! Wonderful news!   x

NM - Wow! Another BFP! That's great news. Congratulations and hope you have a healthy pregnancy. x

Pheobs - Glad all is well with your little boy. Can't believe how many weeks you are, then have to remind myself I'm not that far behind! x

Cupcake - So lovely to hear from you   . Great to hear that the pregnancy and birth went so well and that you're now enjoying your little girl so much. x

Rach - So pleased that your scan went well! Lucky you that you get two more. I won't have anymore now. I don't feel like I need any for reassurance at this point as now I'm feeling baby move and getting more and more of a bump, but it's just so lovely to see them. x

Ceci - Belated Happy Birthday to Joshi! Hope you all had a lovely day!

Juju - Glad you had a lovely holiday. And how exciting that you may be starting treatment again soon! x

Hello to everyone else I've missed out. Hope you're all well. xx

AFM - Had a nice time in Spain catching up with friends, but the weather was mostly rubbish  .


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Hello - I went to Dad's for the day to take him back after Easter and ended up staying Wed to today! Interesting surviving on a few essentials!

Can anyone tell me if their LOs had high temperature and vomiting with teething? C still has not got any teeth, but today I notice that the two bumps at the bottom are more pronounced. He is chew, chew, chew on things. Always does TBH, but more the last few days. He has been tossing food away and refusing to eat much - managed a mashed banana today, but everything else spat out or tossed, particularly if it needed biting. He was not himself today, clingy, crying, sleeping, still playing in between and laughing a bit. I took his temp and it was 38. Then tonight in the bath I decided to give him some paracetamol as it is sticky and gets everywhere and one sip and he threw up three times in the bath   really frightened himself and was sobbing and shivering. Horrid. He also had a leaky dirty nappy on waking this am and then one that was really pale paste like stuff and smelt funny and his bottom is red sore.
I am not sure if it is teeth or if he is ill. Obviously I'll keep a close eye and treat as needed.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Holly it sounds like a bug.  It's horrible when they vomit.  Really scary.  
Hope he's ok.  

Ju   biatch.  

Speeder yeah blw is from 6 mths.


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## carrie lou

Holly - sounds a bit more than just teething to be honest. When Z had a tummy bug a few weeks ago, his poo was very pale and smelly. I've since found out this is characteristic of rota virus which is responsible for most D&V bugs in little ones. Apparently it affects your liver and stops you breaking down bilirubin or something for a short while  So sounds like poor Charley has a bug bless him. Hope he gets better soon.  

Speeder - as Mini says if you want to do BLW you have to wait until baby can sit up well, grab food and put it in mouth themselves. This usually happens close to 6 months. We did purees from about 5 months but as soon as Z could feed himself, he kinda lost interest in spoon feeding a bit. He would try to grab whatever I was eating so in the end I started giving him whatever I was having and he gets on pretty well with that. He usually has cereal for breakfast, sandwich and yogurt for lunch, and for dinner a small portion of whatever we're having (I've got in the habit of not using salt in cooking so it's OK) with fruit for dessert. Another advantage of waiting until 6 months is they can have almost all foods. Whereas at 4 months it's only baby rice, fruit and veg which isn't very filling  As Ju says, he has hungry days when he eats everything in sight and other days where he just picks at his food but I try not to worry cos he's still BF on demand and I suppose gets what he needs from that.  

Ju - sorry to hear about your money worries, hope Nick gets back to work soon   

Abc - glad you had a nice holiday


----------



## Fizzypop

Will reply prop later, but holly it does sound like a bug. Dd had one 4 weeks ago and has left her with lactose sensitivity, quite common apparently. Anyway, she ended up in hospital bc she doesn't have much meat on bones. Hospital told us to stop formula for that day, give 10 ml of diarolyte ev 15 mins to see if they keep it down. Give them breast milk, juice and dry food like rusks, rice cakes etc. anyway, you prob know this bc of yr job but thought I would mention in case useful! We went to walk in centre and they saw us within 15 mins (must have been about 60 people in waiting room  friend was told by dr this week stick to low fat diet for a day. Apparently keeping on water only can thin blood - that's what hospital told us not sure how true?


Dd has learnt dadadada and that's all she says now. Wonder how long before she knows what she's saying!! 


Got to dash, mum is moving in to mine next week so me and dd are filling the car with boxes!


----------



## spooks

hi all, just a quick one to juju  - we had our all blood tests done at the gp's for free - it may be worth finding out if you can do the same


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Yeah - our GP did all the tests for free. I had to be careful about which local hospital I went to to get the samples drawn though - one realised immediately (as they don't do IVF there) and charged me £10 per test plus £30 phlebotomy charge (still cheaper than the clinic) but the other, which did IVF on the NHS there, did not notice and took the blood without question.
You can also get HIV, hepatitis B and C and chlamydia done at the local GUM clinic for free sometimes.

Thanks for the replies about C's illness. I know I do have knowledge from my job, but when it is your own child it is different. Your judgement is clouded with emotion. The HV says she has had consultant paediatiricians on her books who when it is their own child want to be treated like everyone else and told the basics. I have doctor friends who are parents who say that they won't examine their own child and draw any conclusions as they are the child's parents not their doctor. You don't want to go rushing to the doctor at every moment, over reacting and being labelled over anxious. I have to go with gut feeling. When you do a job like mine it is difficult to split clinical knowledge from motherly instinct. I know which one is more reliable!  

Well C has had a very long breast feed this morning and made me sore. He has not been so interested in BF for a few weeks but the last 2 days he has sucked for 30 mins. Must want the comfort. Temperature still high. He slept most of the night in just a nappy and sleep suit, no blanket until 6 am. No more vomiting or nasty nappies. He has had a bottle of milk and I might try him on some weetabix later on if he remains without being sick on milk.

The BLW has to start around 6 months - then they can have almost anything as long as it is no added salt. First foods are sticks of steamed carrot, sweet potato, parsnip, sticks of soft fruit like mango, toast, rice cakes. As the pincer grip improves around 9 months you can move to little foods like peas and breakfast cereals that can be picked up.

To be honest we did a mixture of purees meals and meals that were totally baby led. He now prefers the baby led and I just put out strips of meat, omlette, fish or cheese, sticks of vegetables and potato, pasta or rice and fruit for desert and let him choose. If it is a wet food like spaghetti bolognese, porridge or yogurt I spoon feed those.


----------



## amandaloo

Mistletoe - does sound like a bug sorry I'm a bit late replying . I Know I found when DS has had bugs I've just given him Milk for first day of bug as the food seems to make him sick usually gave him one more milk feed than usual it never effected his sleep not giving food. Then next day milk plus bit of toast and maybe a yogurt then will see what he's like day after with regards to wether I give him more solids . hope that helps  

Juju- glad you had a good holiday, hope your ok sounds like your really unsure about having more tx . I asked my gp about bloods and paying  and he said I didn't need to pay for them . Maybe they are different at every surgery ? 

Abcdef- pants to the rubbish weather :-/ 

I can't read back on my phone but remember someone was asking about thoughts of starting weaning at 4 months . I know I did , don't think it made much difference in his sleep but tbh was good sleeper by then anyway .

Afm- not sure if I mentioned before but been to gp's the other week to be rereferred for tx again . Dont really 
want to start till later this year. My mat leave will soon be over boohoo ! I'm trying to get things organised in my head plus slowly organizing things my mum will need and nursery too . Going back full time at end of June wish it was part time but need cash for tx so needs must :-/ x


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Oh - and on the point of plain water making the blood too thin - what happens is that the sodium levels can become upset in the body - if dehydrated the sodium levels go up in the blood and tissues and if you then just give plain water they return the levels in the blood to normal quicker than in the brain - the brain takes much more time to adjust and this can lead to water swelling the brain which is dangerous as the skull can't swell too so the brain is squashed.

It obviously depends on how quickly the patient became dehydrated and how long it has been for and how high the sodium levels got. Our rule of thumb in ICU is that we correct the levels very slowly over a similar time frame to the illness that led to the dehydration. We obviously measure the levels very frequently too and ensure that they are corrected slowly. A safe way to rehydrate a child who is not ill enough to require IV fluids or hospital treatment is to use rehydration salts which have some sodium and potassium in them so that there is not a rush of water into the body and things are corrected very slowly and safely.


----------



## juju81

Holly, I'm gonna disagree with the other (sorry   ) but that's how Noah was every time he was teething. As he grew up he's not so bad with new teeth now but when he was younger he'd have awful nappies, raging temp, wouldn't eat anything and only wanted milk and when his temp rocketed he threw it up! Of course it oils be a bug but some of those symptoms are teething too! Probably no help, rub some calgel on his gums  

Spooks, thanks hun, unfortunately my PCT don't cover male infertility and this included all my bloods etc. I had to pay about £90 direct to my hospital via my docs last time. It's not really these tests that bother me more the HSG that's nearly £500!

With regards to tx.....I do want another, just without the tx, early preg, late preg and birth! Oh and the first 18months   It won't be until next year anyway, ive gone the other way from everyone else I know and want a big age gap, think its easier to deal with, and Noah will be at pre-school every day lol we also we'd to save the money but I just want an idea how much we need to save. I don't have to be referred either so can start when I want and will need my coil taken out too


----------



## *ALF*

Spooks - got all excited then thought bubs had arrived ( haven't missed it have I?)

Holly - I'm with juju here, DD really suffered with her teeth, raised temp, loose smelly nappies, off her food, not herself etc although she never vomitted with it. I got her through with copious amounts of teething gel and max doses of calpol and ibuprofen. Could of course be a bug but may also be teeth. DD started showing signs of teething at 3 months but didn't cut first tooth till 11.5 months. All her back teeth took 8 weeks of teething before they fully cut.

ALF
Xx


----------



## Spaykay

Food strikes with teething here too with DD, not the other symptoms though. Hoping DS doesn't suffer. 

Kay xxx


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## speeder

Holly - I was about to say it definitely sounds like a bug to me, as I thought it was a myth that babies became quite ill with teething (but shows what I know - 2 mums have said otherwise!).  It's horrible horrible when it is your child that is ill, I guess it doesn't matter what your job is as you just want your little one to be OK and make it all better    DD1 never had trouble teething like that - but she did have tummy bugs just like you describe but they do soon bounce back    When DD1 vomited after she learnt to talk I remember her sobbing on my shoulder saying "mummy I pouring" which broke my heart! 

Juju -    good luck with the tx - I think there is a lot to be said for bigger age gaps too.  I think it seems to be easier on the first child. Your holiday sounds fab - great week to choose weather wise! 

Hello Spooks   

Thanks for the replies about BLW and food.  Honestly I sound like such a divy - you must be wondering how I ever fed DD1......  (Just did purees for the first few months - and a mixture of finger foods and purees after that - so not really BLW). DD2 is a HUNGRY little monster though.  When she's in my lap and I'm eating chocolate (which I regret to say is every night just now which is NOT good for my bikini diet) she makes hilarious little fast breathing noises as if to say "I WANT SOME TOO".  Anyway, we're sticking with carrot and apple puree for now and baby rice but crivens I'd forgotten what an absolute FAFF it is.

I'm off on holiday in 4 weeks to somewhere nice and hot and sunny. I need to shift a stone in weight - it's on my tummy.  I've honestly never had a weight problem in my life before - always been skinny - but I have this fat on my middle that doesn't look great!  My theory is that my body is keeping fat back as I'm still breastfeeding - does that sound like a load of rubbish?  Any advice on how to shift?  I guess not eating cake and chocolate every day would be a start but by mid avo I'm craving sugar....

Hi abcdef - glad you had a good hols - sorry about the weather - can't believe you are 22 weeks already.  Seems like yday I was 22 weeks (was on hols too) and now I've got a 17 week old baby eating purees.  It goes too fast   

Amanda - it's sooo hard going back to work    but it does get easier.  I honestly think that nursery is a good thing - DD1 loves it.  Hope you enjoy the last months of mat leave   

Sorry got to go - hello to everyone else


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## Spaykay

Speeder - ha ha...I've been posting about BLW too. DD just did purees and some finger food, but DS wants to take control! Cries for MOOOOOREEEEE but won't let me stuff it in!

Kay xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Independent little chumpkins aren't they. My DS is an expert on the control front. Won't do anything he does not approve of! But then his mummy was very stubborn


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## juju81

Speeder, where you off too?  I'm off to Italy in 10 weeks!  "crivens" made me laugh     havent heard that for ages     afternoon snacking....banana, few nuts, oat cakes??


Amanda, I went back to work when Noah was nearly 8 months,  I was ready tbh and actually i really like going in.  I work 3 days which is nice and I get to chat, have tea and it soooo made me appreciate him more...that probably sounds silly after everything we went through but by 8 months I was starting to go out of my mind...it felt like getting some normality back...that said I would love maternity leave again!  When Noahs at pre-school   


Spay, you live in spain dont you?  WHat are the temps like in MArch/April time?  Sunbathing weather?


Oh speeder, also, dont worry about what you look like on holiday...no one knows you....I'm overweight but refuse to wear a one piece....I just wear a sarong when I get up to walk around


----------



## spooks

juju that's so bad and ridiculous about your pct funding. Also, I only had one hsg at the very beginning and was never asked to have another one for subsequent tx's. I can think of nicer ways to spend £500!
Hazel - I'm with spay, alf and juju with the teething - that's what DD was like (not so much vomiting but terrible nappies and sore botty and very out of sorts  ) the first teeth were the worst.   
alf - i will keep you informed of any news     hope you're okay   
lots of love to everyone


----------



## Spaykay

Juju - I loved going back to work too hun! As for Spain...it depends on where you go and how lucky you are. On the coast it can most definately be beach weather, but you can also be unlucky and have a week of pouring rain. It souldn't go below 17º on the coast...but it can get as high as 28º, it's just the rain that can be the pain. In Madrid it's bloomin' freezing (well 13º) again!!! In April/May you would have to be luckyy to get outdoor swimming weather really.

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Gosh I hope they don't make me have another HSG when we start more treatment  Wasn't much fun the first time round and at £500 I'd really rather not  

Speeder - I have also  been very skinny (size 8 and just over 8 stone pre-pregnancy), after Z was born though it took me aaaages to shift the weight. I think cos of BFing making me hungry all the time, I just never stopped eating. BUT by 6 months I was back to pre-pregnancy weight and now at 10.5 months am actually lighter than I was before pregnancy!  And I haven't been dieting, just eating whatever I want and the only exercise i do is pushing the pram and swimming once a week  So I'm sure you will shift the weight eventually  

Spooks - good luck   

Amanda - boo to work!  But with any luck you'll be pregnant again soon and more mat leave   

Z is very independent too! Lately he's decided he won't be spoon fed unless he can also have a spoon to hold. He pokes it into the bowl and generally throws the food around with it. Makes a terrible mess while I use the other spoon to get some of it in his mouth! I'm sure he thinks he's feeding himself, bless. If we're lucky enough to have baby No 2, I'll definitely do BLW from day 1 next time, it's so much easier. DH came home last night to find Z in his high chair in the kitchen, happily feeding himself while I got on with cooking our dinner.


----------



## juju81

Interesting Spay, although I might have to put next years oliday on hold.....were going to an open evening in May at Complete in Southampton....on Cupcakes praises and also NM's! Its easier for me to get to aswell! with a view to start Oct-Jan time!     


Carrie, I remember fighting with Noah for the spoon and it going everywhere


----------



## pheobs1

Hi Everyone, sorry I am really slow in posting at the minute.  Struggling with working and being tired!  Can't complain though as tiredness is the only thing I am suffering with   

Rachfins:  I can't believe how good you are not finding out the flavour!  I am such a control freak I had to know.  What a lovely suprise it will be for you   

NM:  How are you feeling, hope you are well and got no nasty early PG sickness, I was lucky and managed to avoid it, so hope you do to!  Three weeks and 1 day left in work for me.  Not officially starting Mat leave though, my work have been really great and are letting me work from home for a few weeks, just popping in for meetings.  I can't wait for the extra sleep, going to try and stock up before our little man gets here! x

Mini:  Excellent news on the job offer, it shows they must think a lot of you.  Have you decided what you are going to do yet?  It is such a tough decision, you need to do what is right for you and little C of course.  How is Charlie?  Hope he is getting better x

Fizzy:  How cute that DD is saying dadaa, I really can't wait to see DH's face when that happens x

SD:  Wow, can't believe your little boys are 8 months already, love the photo, they look so cute x

Carrie:  Congrats on being back at pre pg weight.  I put loads of weight on during all the failed tx.  I lost a bit before IVF but still a bit chunky to start with.  Already thinking of joining Slimming World, my cousin has lost so much weight doing it and she eats loads!  Hope Zac is feeling better, I saw you thought he had slapped cheek x

Speeder:  Sounds like the girls have given you some good advice about weening, I obviously at this point have no clue!  Hope it's going well. x

Ju:  Sounds like you had a lovely time in Dorset.  DH and I are thinking of booking a cottage in Cornwall to take our two dogs and the baby for a little break.  I too like the idea of a larger age gap.  I am an only child so have no direct experience of my own, but my firend has two little girls and the oldest was 5 a week after the second baby was born.  They get on so well, the baby adores her older sister, and the older little girls has so much time to play with the baby.  For us though, if we are having another it has to be a much smaller gap.  DH is dead against having children past 40 for some reason!  Thinks he is too old, so he thinks we have time to have a few more though!  As for paying for tests, it is so expensive.  I was quite lucky, I have private healthcare with work, so I had my lap&dye privatley and paid £100 excess for it.  I didn't say it was for fertility tx, I had issues from an appendix scar and said that was the reason. x

Mini:  Love the name, hope all is going well x

Hi to Amanda, Spooks, Alf, Teresal and Spaykay, sorry if I've missed anyone, my brain is mulch! xxx

AFM:  all good here.  Just had a 4D scan, which was amazing.  I can't stop looking at the videos, although he wasn't very well behaved and it took more than twice as long as it should have!  I'm off today for my weekly midwife appointment.  Supposed to be working but I am actually just chilling in my pajamas!
xxxx


----------



## northernmonkey

Morning all, 


Good grief, I can't keep up with you lot so apologies if I miss anyone   


Juju- brilliant news that you're going to check out Complete. If you do decide to book a consultation go for Mr Brook, he's absolutely fab. I did have another hycosy there but that was my choice because I had an infection after having dd#2 so just wanted to make sure it hadn't affected my tubes. Mr Brook would have been happy for me not to have it done so hopefully you won't have to. Can't believe you had to pay 500 squandoolees either-mine were only (!) 300 and something. By the way have you thought about appealing to your PCT about funding for your blood tests? I don't know quite how it works but if you're not in a hurry to start tx it might be worth considering. 


Holly- how's DS? My youngest was also poorly when she had teeth coming and would always throw up. Have you had any more thoughts on your job? 


Speeder - I've always been really petite too and am not much over 8 stone now but my tum is definitely much flabbier than it used to be. It didn't bother me when I was bf'ing cos I do think you need a bit of fat stored up but I must admit I'd like to get rid of it now. When I get time (  ) I'll get back into my exercise and will shift it but that's probably a good few years away! 


Amanda - how exciting thinking about more tx! 


Hello to ABC, Mini, Fizzy, Spaykay, Carrie, Spooks, Alf and everyone else.   


AFM- 5 weeks pg yesterday and the anxiety has set in. Had to ring clinic yesterday because I'm panicking over my complete lack of symptoms. Totally irrational because they didn't kick in until 6-7 weeks with the girls but I hate feeling so normal, I just want to actually feel pregnant instead of worrying why I don't. Anyway the nurse I spoke to (who is also a midwife) was lovely and calmed me down so I'm trying to think more positively. Roll on 2 weeks today for my scan! I think it's difficult to believe it's real until you see the baby on screen.


----------



## northernmonkey

Phoebs - our posts just crossed!  How exciting, I loved the stage you're at now, winding down at work and realising that I really was about to become a mummy!! 


Forgot to say about the weaning - it's really interesting hearing everyone's preferences. I did purées with dd#1 and blw with #2 and if this pg goes ok I plan to do purées again next time. I completely agree with the idea of and I know it's much less faff  but I just always worried that dd#2 wasn't eating enough on it because she just seemed to play with the food rather than eat it. Dd#1 also ate much more fruit and veg doing the purées and even now dd#2 is a complete veggie dodger. I guess I'll never know whether it was coincidence but I'm just such a control freak I like to see exactly how much they are eating! Perhaps I'll learn to relax a bit more and go with the flow when I have 3 to juggle   .


----------



## juju81

NM I did appeal but it nowhere! I'm happy to go ahead without another tube check! I did a mixture of peer and blW or the same reason u only did purees! He'll eat anything...when he eats! Oh god that's how I know I'm gonna feel....I hate the worrying throughout! Did u have injections or clomid or nothing?


----------



## pippilongstockings

Crikey, I went away for a week and so much has happened!!
NM - congratulations! I'm very jealous    
Mini - love the name. We never shorten Z's name either but a lot of other people do. I'm not worrying about it anymore. I've even stopped worrying about the lady at nursery who calls him "Zacky" - ugh!
juju - wowser, I never thought you'd go for #2! Brilliant news and a larger age gap will be great. Two of my friends have bigger gaps (3 1/2 and 4 years) and they have found having 2 a breeze!
back later, need to catch up! x


----------



## northernmonkey

Juju - I had injections. One drug daily to stop my body ovulating, another alternate days for the follies then trigger 39 hours before basting. Their timing at complete is brilliant, my ov pains started on the way to the hossie the morning of my iui.  I didn't realise you'd appealed already. Depends how much you want to push it but you could always ask your local MP to help you appeal again?? They can be really good at helping with these things from what I've heard. 


Pippi - thanks for the congrats. Ooh! I think you might know SamJ.... Take a look at her diary!!


----------



## juju81

NM, my local mp was involved lol! 

Pippi, I know   I'm shocked too!

I complained to the bridge about my donor issue....when I rung earlier to see how my complaint was getting on she knew my first name just by me saying my surname....I imagine my name is mud there    I'll know the outcome next week


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

NM - I had no symptoms til about 7 weeks.


----------



## Spaykay

NM - I never had any symptoms!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

My symptoms kicked in at 6 weeks - then it was unmistakeable  Probably why I didn't get that anxious, cos I felt so  awful I knew the little bean was snuggling in tight!


----------



## northernmonkey

Thanks ladies. I'm feeling slightly more queasy today so now am worrying that it could be twins   


Forgot to tell you all a strange but true story...  when we were driving to my mum's for Easter (before I'd tested) dd#1 suddenly piped up from the back of the car 'mummy's getting pregnant.' We hadn't told her anything about tx so it really was a random statement. Spooky....  


Anyone got any suggestions for getting rid of ants in the house? We've got loads at the minute and I don't really want to put poison down with kids and a dog wandering around.


----------



## Spaykay

Ants....we bought some little white box things that the ants creep into and take what they think is food and then take it back to their home for mass slaughter! I put them under the sofa where ants, but not kids could reach. Seemed to work! Not sure what they're called but they're plastic and about the size of 2 matchboxes.

Kay xxx


----------



## northernmonkey

Thanks Kay, I'll see if I can get something similar.  


Cupcake - happy birthday for tomorrow!! Hope you have a lovely day.


----------



## carrie lou

Cupcake - yes BLW is baby led weaning! Basically you wait until baby is old enough to sit up, hold food and feed themselves, then offer finger foods and other things that are easy. They eat as much or as little as they like and you continue all milk feeds as normal until they're ready to drop them. It's messy but quite fun  Though we are really doing a combo of BLW and spoon feeding.


With the breastfeeding - breast milk doesn't fill them up as much as formula, it's much more quickly digested so it won't keep her satisfied for as long as formula. But doesn't mean there's anything wrong with your milk or anything like that. Personally if I were you I wouldn't stop BFing completely - in an emergency e.g. if you're out and about and run out of bottles or don't pack enough, it's useful to have some on tap so to speak  Just my opinion though, you've got to do what's right for you.


----------



## carrie lou

Yeah with BLW you don't do purees. Just wait till 6 months (or nearly) and go straight to finger foods. I don't know much about combi feeding but I think it is possible to do just 2 feeds a day and your supply will adjust. HH does combi feeding, maybe she can advise you better than I can


----------



## Spaykay

I'm combining as I'm too much of a wimp to only do BLW. Last night he chewed on chicken....1 hour later after a bath, breast feed etc etc I saw a lump the size of a 10p coin come up into his mouth...where had it been hiding? Also, what if I'd not spotted it and he'd gone to bed with it? He could've choked no?

Kay xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

That is scary Kay - I bet his swallowed it and then the stomach couldn't deal with it so regurgitated it.

Charley still has 1-3 breast feeds a day and my milk is still there. He always has his morning feed from both sides laying in bed and it is our quiet cuddle time. I am glad in a way that we were forced to combine feed (I wanted to exclusively BF, but the low milk supply and Charley getting so ill from it forced the formula issue) It was very hard work at the beginning..... breast feeding to increase what supply I had, expressing and sterilising bottles and topping up, but now we have the best of both worlds. The closeness and ''on tap'' milk, if he is distressed it calms him, and the flexibility to bottle feed when out and for other people like my Dad being able to feed him, which brings them closer and lets me get on with some chores while he is fed.
I have friends who never introduced the bottle and now their babies won't take milk in a bottle. They are going back to work and their babies won't get any daytime milk feeds. Exclusive breast feeding is great, but it does have some longer term issues that may not be thought about.


----------



## Spaykay

I wish I was combine feeding. I waited a few weeks as to not confuse A with bottle and nipple. He would take 1oz then refuse the bottle! Grrrrr.... He now has to learn to drink from a cup so as to take milk from there at 10 1/2 months. Mind you, DD rejected me and milk at 11 months anyway. Did use a sippy but took little. So long as cheese, yogurt eaten he'll be ok. Just worrying ahead as I usually do!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Z has never taken a bottle (we tried introducing a bottle of EBM at 6 weeks but he wouldn't have it). We started giving him a cup at about 4 months though and he will happily drink anything out of there - milk, water, juice. Maybe it would have been nice to have someone help with the feeds in those early months - but on the other hand that time was over so quickly and it did give us some lovely bonding time.


----------



## Spaykay

CL - I did the same with DD with a cup but can't remember how long it took her to actually drink from it! DS is at the stage of throwing it around and if it goes in his mouth I lift it so water dribbles in, then he spits and goes bleeeeerrrrhhhhhhh!!!! ha ha! This is normal right? When he starts drinking properly I will substitute 1 day feed for formula in cup and then 2 and then the morning and then the night. Well, that's my plan...or I will remove my breasts and send them  to Nursery with him in September.

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Kay   I'm sure he will be fine. If he really won't have the formula, he might just make up for missed feeds when he gets home with you. Z also chucks his cup around a fair bit and yes we've been through the spitting phase and trying to blow bubbles into the cup  BUT now at 10.5 months he will actually pick up the cup and help himself to a drink, totally independently!  I so proud. Worth persevering with


----------



## Spaykay

At the moment DS spits and throws, then DD comes along and drinks it. Goodreally as she doesn't drink half as much water as she should!

Kay xxx


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

We did blw. He never choked. Some people get confused with gagging and choking.  Gagging is a normal reflex. I didn't purée anything.  It was hard work but meant no purée.  

I don't think I did it quite right cos now he's a fussy eater.  You are meant to let them explore your plate and eat off that.  But cos we ate at different times he never did that.  Until now   we've had to have tea with him so he sees us eat. It's worked cos he now eats lots of different foods.


----------



## Spaykay

MM - I think fussy eaters are fussy eaters whatever you do!!! My DD won't eat veg and I blame myself...but reading back on here, she never liked it! I may move to BLW when DS has same eating time as DD. At the mo he has cereal at her dinner time.

Kay xxx


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## hakunamatata

hi girls just a flying visit to say hi.
nm the early days are hard i think i always fancied a little flap i could lift and find out if all was ok. after my m/c i just feared it happening again, but hey my angel addi is here and healthy. 
cupcake so nice to see you posting again, hope you had a good birthday.
i think when i wean i will do it the old fashioned way with purees, maybe im not very progressive. went to new parent club where they advocate the 6 month rule but 17 weeks if absolutely nec but only fruit veg and cereal.
i guess there are advantages to addi having to be combined feeding from the beginning, she'll even take bottle just after breast as sometimes she gets stroppy and head flys back and forth with my nipple in lol or wont accept nipple so hubby steps in. i do love the the closeness of breast feeding. not sure how long i will continue. im doing like i did with pregnancy one day at a time. 
i did have a spell of feeling anxious about the new parent group in the week and travel logistics, parking etc, but came through and even went to post natal pilates this week too. was nice to do something for me.
love reading all your chatter girls sorry i dont post often, cant post from mobile and dont pick up my laptop very often. x keeping up with cleaning is an interesting one, standards have had to drop. x but having my angel is so worth it all and loving enjoying time with her x
love to all x


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Hak you wait til she is crawling and you can't leave her, thats when your standards will really drop    i have no standards now    its taken all day to hoover the kitchen and lounge!   

Glad you made it to group. it does get easier, then once you've mastered it with your eyes closed you'l have another and then have to retrain your head to dealing with 2


----------



## carrie lou

Yes it is a bit of a nightmare round here at the mo ... Z is crawling and into everything, I can't leave him for a moment. Trying to clean the toilet with him sticking his hands into the bowl, then when my back was turned for a second he's playing with the loo brush or throwing his toothbrush into the toilet  I have to save most of the cleaning for the weekends when DH can watch him for a bit


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Cleaning - what's that? When I go back to work there will be even less of it going on if that is possible!  

Having said that, I do like to hoover round most days as the dog brings in all sorts of leaves and twigs on his long fur and Charley likes to practice pincer grip and eating whatever he can find. I did actually manage to clean about an inch of dust off the TV and video and mantlepiece today and wipe down the table surfaces as Charley has been so sleepy with his malady that he slept for 2 hours this pm - woo hoo   Been annoying me, but everytime I try and start some cleaning I have LO climbing up me and screaming. I try to do a lot of things like washing bottles and hanging up laundry with one hand and him on my hip, but it takes 3 times as long. I can't even leave him in his walker or his baby einstein toy ring anymore as he can do a head first dive out of them.  He is so clingy at the moment.   all the time if I am not carrying him. Sweet but impossible.  Think it is a phase, he's been poorly all week with a stomach bug nd temperature and may also have a tooth coming at last.
Washing bottles, making milk, doing laundry, cleaning the kitchen, bathroom, shopping, doing the dishwasher, sorting out the rubbish, cooking, the paperwork and the hoovering have to be my priorities at the moment. Dusting, clearing out cupboards and tidying them, deep cleaning anything, gardening are on the back burner and will get done once in a while. Don't know when mind.

Saying that long list in addition to all the normal childcare makes me realise just how much we do get done. Don't feel so bad now.

I also have to clean my Dad's house when I go there, but at least he will hold C for me.


----------



## carrie lou

Holly - I think it is something about this age. Z is also going through a very clingy stage at the moment, wants to be held all the time and asking for more BFs for the comfort. And if I'm out of his sight he gets hysterical. Maybe Wonder Week 46? (He is 47 weeks old now) I have a very good sling that I pop him in and carry him with me when I need to get things done. I hope Charley's on the mend soon  


Oh and dust ... what's that?!


----------



## juju81

Noah hated the sound of the Hoover...evm now if it's on he has to be behind it! Nick does most of he cleaning tho I just do the washing....bit of a result really ha ha


----------



## carrie lou

Funny, Z loves the hoover, gets quite excited when I get it out and "walks" along behind it holding on  BUT he doesn't like the sound when I try to use the nozzle, he will scream blue murder. So all the little nooks and crannies remain unhoovered


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## juju81

He liked it when he was younger, used to stop him crying...hair dryer was the same but he doesn't mind thr now!


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

C loves the hoover and even likes being sucked gently by the nozzle attachment, makes him giggle


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Lucas used to like the Hoover but hates it now


----------



## *ALF*

DD has always hated the hoover. She suffers with hyperaccusis (hypersensitive hearing) so she has a fearful/panic type reaction to lots of noises that most of us think nothing of, so round the house reacts to the hoover, washing machine, tumble dryer, shower, hairdryer, taps on too loud, someone blowing their noses......... makes life interesting!!!
There's a poem that i can never remember the name of but the jist is to let the dust be and the cobwebs stay as you child is only a child for such a short time.  
I plan to deep clean the house once DD is at school full time, until then it will continue to get a wipe over a general clean..............I request that visitors refrain from writing their name in the dust, I think they think I'm joking, but I'm not. Don't get me wrong we are not an unhygenically dirty house, but neither do we live in a show home!!

On the weaning front I would have prefered to do a mixture of finger foods and spoon feeding, but DD stubornly refused ANYTHING off of a spoon, even if she had finger foods I couldn't sneak a spoonful in, couldn't even feed her yogurts.  I had no option but to leave her to it, but I worried for months that she wasn't getting enough, but she's above average height and weight and maintained those centiles, so she must have been getting enough.

Spooks - any movement

Love to all
ALF
xx


----------



## ceci.bee

No hoovers in Africa, but instead have no carpets (too hot and too many bugs) and a lovely housekeeper who keeps the place spotless, does the washing up and goes shopping for me - there are some advantages of living with power cuts, v little fuel in the 10th poorest country in the world. They say that for every person you employ, you are supporting 7 others here.

Joshi plays outside in the dirt all the time and I am a big believer in the hygiene hypothesis - a bit of dirt now causes no harm and may do lots of good things to his immune system. So far he has had 2 colds only his entire life and has not had anything else.........fingers crossed for now!!

lots of love
Ceci


----------



## juju81

Life's to short to have a spotless house   

Kids fears grow so u might find as they get a bit older things/noises that never used to bother them might start frightening them! 

Urgh, I'm of to work, laterssssssssssss!


----------



## pheobs1

Hi everyone, hope you all had a lovely weekend?
I was after some tips. Any advice on sleekly positions? I've been really lucky so far, but for the last month I've got this pain under my left boob, on the bone, worse when I lay down. It's gotton progressively worse and I've not had much sleep since Friday. I don't think it's the baby, I can feel him kicking low down, it literally takes my breath away. It used to be better if I slept on my left but now it's just as bad. I've been up all night, just had a great sleep between 6 and 7:30, but have to get up for work, I'm already going to be an hour late but I needed those z's!
Xxx


----------



## Spaykay

Phoebs - have you tried sleeping in a more seated position?

Fears...we have to tell monsters to leave DD's room every night. Dh had to physically carry one out last night...how they keep getting in there I have no idea!

Kay xxx


----------



## carrie lou

Pheobs it's tricky once you reach a certain size  I got a widgey pillow from Mothercare, it's a sort of crescent shaped pillow that you can use to prop yourself up in a comfy position. I used about 4 other pillows too  The widgey is useful after the baby is born also, you can use it as a feeding cushion and also to prop baby up when he's learning to sit. It's a bit pricey but in my opinion well worth it cos it's multi-purpose. I still use it sometimes now.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

I had a very long pillow my friend gave me. I used to have it between my knees, up the front of my bump and under my arm to distribute and support the weight. I had pillows down my back too to support me. Semi recumbant is good too, sitting up slightly  - just get lots of large soft pillows and sink in.

My NHS midwifery team offered accupuncture for back and neck pain and that helped. Might be worth asking if there is anything available or physio.

Also worth getting checked over. Is it definitely musculoskeletal pain - hurts on movement? Or is it deeper - best to be checked over if that is the case.

I have had one joint, muscle, rib, neck pain after another with pregnancy and life with a new born. I had very severe muscle spasm type pains in my ribs several times to the point where I could hardly move or take a deep breath nor sleep. Even after the birth I got them. Then I could not bend or straighten my arm for a long time at all - absolute agony, could not even get my hand near my head to brush my hair, then my knee, now I have an exacerbation of carpal tunnel syndrome. Just been to the doctors today as I am sick of waking up with numb fingers.


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Pheobs - I ended up sleeping sitting up. I had a wedge to support the bump, With lnumber 1 i had the long pillow  to support my hips and the wedge with number 2 i just needed the wedge later on in pg. Sleep on your left side, its much better. 

I can send you the wedge and long pillow if you like? Don't mind if you don't want it (i won't be offended!!)    I WILL NOT BE NEEDING THEM EVER AGAIN


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Famous last words ....


----------



## pheobs1

Hiya, thanks for all your replies and thanks for the kind offer, I have a wedge and one of those long ones. I can get comfy laying down, it's just this stupid pain in my left rib! I dont mean to sound dramatic, but it feels like I've broken a rib!
I've had the pain in work today just sitting up, always the exact same place. I'm seeing the midwife weds so will tell her again, I have mentioned it loads of times but she just smiles and ignores it! But it's much more painful now. It's the only thing that I've had so far, so I'm so lucky and apart from that I feel amazing.

Mini... Are you sure you won't need it again! ;-) 
Xxx


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## Spaykay

Phoebes - urmmm....yuo may have broken a rib hun! My bro broke my mum's when he was in there!!!

Kay xxx


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## pheobs1

Oohh??!!!
Meant to ask too, I'm a little paranoid about doing everything by the book and inobviously read that sleeping on your back is a no no. Does that just mean laying flat down on your back? I was thinking of sleeping sitting up more with my v pillow for support but not sure if it's a good idea?
Xxx


----------



## carrie lou

The reason you're told not to lie flat on your back is because the weight of the uterus and baby can squash your lungs and a major blood vessel returning blood to the heart. But I think you would know if there was any danger of this because you would feel dizzy and short of breath! If you prop yourself up semi reclining, it should be fine. I used to make a sort of nest out of as many pillows as I could lay my hands on  and just sort of recline against it.


Mini - are you sure?


----------



## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

Now now girls.   you taking the p out of me  
Dh asked if I wanted another the other day. Good job he was driving  

Pheobs yeah you'll be fine sitting up.  Laying on back might make u dizzy that's all.  
Get your ribs checked.


----------



## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - my friend had a condition called costochondritis when pregnant - the pain of this is at the front where the cartillage attaching the ribs becomes inflammed.

I had these rib pains you describe when pregnant. I could not take a deep breath - I think it was an intercostal muscle spasm from all the hormonal changes, shift in muscle use due to shape and weight and laying differently. As I said I also got them after the birth due to lifting the baby and laying breast feeding.

Watch this thread just asked on the midwife board - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=286530.msg4994656;boardseen#new


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## pheobs1

Thanks Hazel xxx


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## amandaloo

Morning ladies  
Hak- well done on getting to the group I still dont go to any   . However DS is starting nursery in the middle of May so hope that will help with the socialising for him.

Alf- Heck Ive never heard of what your DD suffers from how awful for her  

Ceci- Id love to have a cleaner Ive always said it to DH but he has none of it    

Spooks- if your reading hope you are well cant be long now?

Pheobs- Hope you slept a bit better last night  . Hard work not sleeping when pg then having to go to work.   . I remember having really bad wind pain in the exact place you described and it didnt go away go worse until i had peppermint tea and gripe water. Think my friend had bad wind pain too in simular area. Dont underestimate wind ouchhhhh. 

Hello Spaykay, Carrielou, Juju, Holly, and anyone Ive missed   

AFM- the private clinic has received referral so just to ring for appt. Dont think im going to make an appt until  late august. fancy a holiday abroad first before I start any tx again. Not sure if they will book an appt that far in advance but will try. DS doing well, its his christening this sunday


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## Rachfins

Morning Ladies,

Quick one as I am at work.

Can anyone give some good tips for lower back pain and sleeping please? It started a few days ago and I it noticed during the night. I am sleeping on my left side, using a long sleep pillow, which was fine until a few days ago. Am I positioning if wrong? I sleep with it between my legs and my legs are bent, it rests against my small bump and I cuddle the top with my arms, keeping my head on normal pillow. I have also propped a pillow against my back. In the last couple of days I have been waking up a few times during the night with lower back pain, a pain down my the side of left thigh (I know this can be connected to back pain as I had it like this years ago from doing step aerobics) and feeling slightly sick. I now have back pain all day. Any suggestions will be greatfully welcomed.  

Rach x


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## carrie lou

Aw Rach I sympathise! I had more or less chronic back pain from 20 weeks onwards, am prone to it anyway so obviously carrying around the extra weight just exacerbated things. No tips on the sleeping position beyond what I said to Pheobs - a support pillow like you have or else make a mountain of pillows and sleep semi reclining, depends what you find most comfy.

For back pain during the day, I wore a support belt under my bump which made an amazing difference. No prizes for glamour though!  Also if you do a lot of sitting at work, make sure your chair is adjusted properly. I found sitting still for a long time was a bad thing - I would have to get up at least every hour or so and move around. Oh and get your DH to give you a back rub, that helps too. If none of these make any difference, perhaps worth having a word with your midwife. Hope this helps hun  

Amanda - how lovely having DS christened! Z was christened and had a naming ceremony on the same day in november, it was lovely. Hope you have a fabulous day, enjoy  

Ceci - I grew up in South Africa and we had a cleaning lady/nanny, she was supporting about 6 relatives on her salary! Amazing isn't it. Couldn't afford to do that here.


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## juju81

Phoebs it could also be the position the baby's lying! Noah's **** was against my left rib for all my pregnancy. Unfortunately he bigger he got he worse it was.   sorry doesn't fill u with much hope  

Rach, sounds like sciatica hun, I had that and ended up being signed off for a while from work. And advised to take paracetamol. Unfortunately your getting I the stage now where the baby is grtting bigger and running out of space !!!

Jeez, do I really want another  

Amanda, defo get a holiday on before another


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

I had accupuncture for my back and neck pains in pregnancy and it did make a difference. I was lucky in that my Trust had an accupuncture midwife and it was free.

The support belt is a very good idea as is trying a different position.

May be you could ask if the midwifery department has a physiotherapist attached.


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## juju81

Bloody hell Phoebs, where's ur pregnancy gone? What's ur due date?


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## pheobs1

Ju - I know! July 2nd. It dragged until about 20 weeks then it's flown by. I think I'm a bit abnormal as I love being pregnant so much!

Thanks for all your tips, I am pleased to report that I had a brilliant sleep last night, didn't even get up to go to the loo! I still slept on my side but ad a different pillow arrangement and didn't have the pain at all and touch wood, haven't had it today either 

Rach - your midwife should be able to refer you for physio, mine did. I broke my coccyx years ago so being pg aggravates that. They can assess you and maybe give you a belt like Carie? Apparently the belt was no good for me, my problem it the reverse to te normal! Just typical of me! She said I need release massage but DH is useless at it. On the plus side he has become an expert in painting my toe nails!


Amanda how exciting it's Noahs christening! Will PM you later x

Xx


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## Rachfins

Thanks ladies for all your advice  . Went to Motercare and bought a Dream Genii support pillo and support band.  Also bought cushion for my chair at work and ave been more careful with my posture and got up and walked around more during the day. Lt hope allow this helps and I get a better nights sleep.

Rach x


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## pheobs1

Hiya,'sorry for the me post bu super paranoid 30 week pregnant lady post alert! I had a midwife appointment yesterday and saw a midwife is never seen before because mine was on holiday. She had a student with her and wasn't all that pleasant to be honest. While I was giving her my history the student was in the other room checking my urine, so didn't hear me say about my placenta being anterior and low lying. The student examined me, as they usually do, the midwife paid no attention and was at her desk facing the other way and never even turned around. She did the usual feeling around but Asked me to keep pulling my leggins down more and more. She said sorry I needto go low down. She was really digging her fingers into the front of my tummy low down in my pubic area. She said the baby was head down but free moving.
I felt a bit uncomfortanble all day after and a bit 'leaky'. A few hours later I felt like I had wet my self a bit, went to the loo and (sorry TMI) had a slimey, clear discharge, took a few wipes to get rid of. I got in the car to drive and as I moved felt some water trickle out,'like I'd wet myself a bit. Got to the restaurat and went to the loo, my knickershad a patch of water on them and I had the same discharge. I ate out, then on the way home felt that trickling feeling again. Went to the loo when I got in and had the same discharge a wet mark on my knickers. All night as I've turned I've felt that trickling feeling.
The thing is I know I'm super paranoid because of everything we went through to get pregnant and after loosing a twin, the midwives aren't very nice when you ring them. Dintthink I'd worry sonmuch if it wasn't clear? My mother wanted me to ring last night. Any thoughts greatfully welcome xxxxxx

Rach, hole you are sleeping better xx


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## Lindz

Hiya Pheobs
Super quick post as on train to work. I'm sure it's nothing to be worried about and might even just be a coincidence after the rough student BUT you're worrying about it and if there's even a small chance that it is something then you should get yourself checked. I'd ring them now and go in ASAP thisorning if you can then hopefully it'll be quiet and you'll be in and out with no fuss and feeling more relaxed! If they do do a scan to check your water or anything then at least you get to see bubs again. Xxx


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

It is very common to get a watery copious clear discharge in pregnancy, but if you think your amniotic sac has broken, then you need to go to the maternity triage and let them check you over. It would just be a coincidence as the sac is very well protected with the masses of muscle layers to go through, but if you have broken your waters at 30 weeks there is a risk of infection.


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## carrie lou

Hi Pheobs, I agree with Lindz and Holly. If you are at all worried that it might be your waters, you definitely need to ring the hospital. It is most likely a false alarm and they will reassure you and send you home. But it is best not to take any chances. If they are rude or abrupt with you, it's really their issue, not yours. Hopefully though they will take the same view that it's better to be safe than sorry. I know my MW always said to ring her if any concerns. Good luck hun and let us know how you get on


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## Fizzypop

Pheobs - ditto what the others have said, let us know how you get on x

I think it is prob just coincidence too. In our experience students can actually be better at some things because knowledge is fresh in their head if you know what I mean. It's also surprisingly common for midwives to be a little bit rough when checking positions etc.


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## Spaykay

Phoebs - hope all is ok ((())) I can't remember what amneotic fluid is supposed to smell like, but maybe you cuold look this up and have a sniff (sorry....advice given when unsure if going into labour) Was it like egg yolk or liquid? The plug can go long before labour too. I always air on caution and would get checked!

Kay xxx


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## pheobs1

Hi, thanks for all your posts. I phoned the midwife and she said it sounds like an infection and to ring the labour ward just to be safe, she said thy would check me over and probably take a swab. Phoned labour triage, they told me to lie down for 2 hours and check the baby's movements and ring them back. I did and said that he moved a lot, they said that was a good sign and they weren't convinced it was my waters and to keep an eye on it. So still worried an non the wiser really! Xxx


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## speeder

Hi Phoebs

Just quickie from me....    I worried ALL the time in the last tri about what you are worrying about so     .  I think - ahem - some ladies are wetter than others during pg - especially at the end and it can be difficult not to worry, I know    I went into triage at least a couple of times to be checked over.  Both times I felt like you did - trickling and wet patches. To be honest, the midwives said to me that they can't really tell what it is by smell alone (YUK - I know...!) They were v reassuring both times - checked movement etc.  I would just go into triage if you are worried - I would be v surprised if there is a problem but it will stop you worrying hun - which isn't good for you or baby   

I  had wet patches quite a few times - I think sometimes it was just wee and other times excess discharge - I was amazed how much there could be (it was never amniotic fluid though - both times my waters broke it was v obvious) 

I actually have some pantyliners called amniosense which change colour when amniotic fluid touches them.  I bought them during my first pg but I never actually used them so have no idea if they are any good or not!

I would be happy to post them to you if you pm me - free of charge - happy for them to go to a good home


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

pheobs - don't want to alarm you but my waters trickled with DS1. I thought i'd wet myself, it kept coming out bit by bit. The hosptal asked if i thought my waters had gone    how would i know!!    anyway they examined me, they still kept saying  they thought they hadnt gone until she saw the waters on the speculam    

why don't you ask to be examined? then you will know for sure


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## ♥ Mighty Mini ♥

speeder - with DS1 my waters tricked and i didn't know if it was them or i'd wet myself, with DS2 i had the tradiional burst and then the gush!    good job it was in hospital and not in my bed


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## Fizzypop

Phoebs- it sounds like you haven't been examined and just diagnosed over the phone? If you are still worried would go down there until you are examined. Better to keep on and make a fuss rather than to sit and worry hun xxx


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## juju81

Phoebs I'd ask to be checked out, and take speeder up on her offer! Cupcake had them panty liners too   

Mini, I had the gush, all over the bedroom floor


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## pheobs1

Thanks everyone. I think it's still a bit leaky, some of it is wee, but some of it isn't. If it carries on, I will just go in. I was a bit miffed to be honest that they didn't even bother to look. My next appointment isn't until may 10th, when I have a scan for the placenta.

Thanks speeder, I will PM you. I looked on line and it says for use after 36 weeks, I'm 31 on Monday, do you think that's ok?
Xxx


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## pheobs1

Hiya, sorry for the me post.
I went shopping earlier and as I walked I just got soaking wet, sorry for the tmi but it didn't smell like we'd either, it smelt like amniotic fluid is supposed to smell according to my googling!
So my mum was with me and we went to the maternity triage that had spoken to me on the phone yesterday. They said it could be a number of things, wee, amniotic fluid, a show, an infection or increase in discharge. They monitored me and the baby for half an hour to check heart rate and see if I was having contractions. Then the horrible part, registra came and did a swab, which was really painful. Not great and the funny thing is I have been through so much worse to get this far! They said it looked rally red and sore but my cervix was closed. The discharge was very watery (again tmi alert) and a bit creamy. They said all was fine and sent me home with a canestan pesserie to use tonight. I feel much more relaxed now. I can deal with the leakage as long as I know it's not the fluid. Thanks for all your advice and support.
Xxxx
P.S can't sleep now! Xx


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## *ALF*

Glad you got it checked out Phoebs and all is okay. Hope you got some sleep!!!


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Phoebs - glad it was checked out. So they think it is thrush?
Glad baby is ok.


I'm going to have to open a new thread.
I have not been around much in a volunteer capacity lately, but I've just noticed we are well over 100 pages. So I'll set up Part 22 - see you over there.


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## Mistletoe (Holly)

Here is the new thread - Part 22....
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=286836.0


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