# Question for donors...



## CluckCluck (Jun 5, 2007)

Hi there,
Question here for donors... how do you deal with the disappointment of a negative result?  I'm sad, but knowing it is so much worse for BS and BIL it almost feels self-indulgent to be sad. I'm soo lucky, having had 2 wonderful children without problems. Its so unfair. And I feel so helpless.
Any thoughts?
cluckcluck


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## A.T.C.C (Mar 13, 2006)

Cluck Cluck - donating for someone you know has so much emotional involvement. If you hadnt been the donor you would still be gutted for your sister but now you feel much worse cos you were a major part in your sisters journey.
There are no answers to why awful things happen to people and theres no certian way of dealing with things. You deal with this as you feel you need to. Dont feel indulgent cos you're sad! you went through a lot to help your sister and youve been there for her in every possible (and more) way.
Cry    as much as you need to and let your sister know how you're feeling cos it may help her in her low moments, she knows that you're here for her and im sure she would be there for you in a flash if she thought you were hurting too.
Take time to get through this awful news and dont try and be the strong one all the time cos you deserve a cuddle and some understanding too.
Take care and if you ever want to let it out im here babe , love Ang xxxx


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## surromummyuk (Oct 4, 2007)

ok not been a donor yet but been a surro twice and i know when i got that bfn i used to be terribly hard on myself,i felt so bad for my ips and took it really to heart


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