# Only 20% chance of falling pregnant through IVF - is that good or bad?



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

Hi all,

Just had a consultation with a private fertility clinic and due to my problems IVF is our only option. He said the chances of falling pregnant through IVF is 20%, it was 40% on Clomid. I'm feeling so negative and down about it all, I just don't know what to do. What percentage were you told when seeking further treatment? Did it work for you?


----------



## suemac38 (Mar 28, 2007)

Hi there

Please don't be down hearted. I was told i would have a 15% chance of the first IVF working due to just my age & my first time worked & me & dh still can't quite beleive our luck!!!! So i would say that can happen to you hun & you have better chances than i had. Chin up hun    

Best of luck      

Sue XX


----------



## AnneS (Sep 18, 2006)

Hi there,

so sorry to read that this is getting you down.
If you decide to try IVF, try not to worry too much about chances.
I know it does not help to be told all these percentages, but in the end it also depends on luck and a positive attitude and you won't get percentages for those  

Wishing you the best of luck with whatever decision you will take. take care   

Caroline Anne


----------



## TwiceBlessed (Nov 8, 2006)

The percentage chance I was given is shown just under my login name to the left...

20% is a lot better than 1% and look at my outcome.....that was a 1% chance of getting to ET as well, not just getting pg.....

Please hang in there. Who says you cant be one of those 20%


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

Thank you all for taking time out and replying. I'm certainly feeling the positivity being thrown my way!

EBW1969 - 1%?! Man, little Kate IS a miracle! Congratulations to you, and you suemac38. 

I'm so sorry to hear about your m/c Caroline, how are you doing?


----------



## TwiceBlessed (Nov 8, 2006)

Thanks fox....see SOMEONE has to be that percentage...!

let us know what you decide.

I was advised to cancel part way through tx and to go with donor eggs "next time" (which dp is against).  Thought, "no, Im half way through this tx, if I stop now I'll always wonder what if".  Whatever decision you make I am sure it will be the right one for you xxx


----------



## Francie (Mar 11, 2008)

Hi Fox

Deciding whether to try IVF is a hard decision, I know. It's very traumatic, expensive and there are no guarantees. Your dr is telling you the odds because it's important you understand your chance of success in order to make an informed decision.  The 20% he's given you are based on your age, your FSH level and the clinic's average success rates.  20% is pretty standard for a 38 year old. That means 20% every time you try.  If it doesn't work the first time, you don't have a 40% chance the 2nd time. In fact at our age, the odds probably get smaller every time because our fertility is declining so we are less likely to have a good response to the drugs.  

Positive thinking is essential to get through the process.  But I don't think there is any evidence it actually improves the outcome of treatment. After all, if positive thinking made the difference we'd all be pregnant. Our dr suggested we try to be realisitic but optimistic. 

There are some wonderful success stories of people who beat the odds and people who get pregnant first time.  But they are the lucky ones. I read an article yesterday that estimated 50% of the people who try IVF get pregnant and the average number of goes before succeeding or giving up is 3 attempts. That means for every couple that gets pregnant, there's another that goes away heartbroken and a lot poorer.  

I really don't want to depress you and sorry if I have.  But it think it's very important to give a balanced picture. As you'll see from my signature, we've not been among the lucky ones.

Good luck with your decision making and with whatever you decide to do.

xxx


----------



## biddy2 (Apr 21, 2008)

Hello Fox

As Francie said 20% is realistic for our age group.

I was given chances of 10% when starting my last cycle... and these were dropped when they only got three eggs at collection. I am now 9 weeks pregnant. I know I am one of the lucky ones, but there are lucky ones! 

Our first ivf cycle was a disaster but incredibly useful diagnostically. I wasn't going to do this cycle... i was all for going onto egg donation. But my husband wanted a last bash. We came under pressure to "give up my place on the waiting list so another couple with better chances could have it". Don't forget that doctors work with populations but we are individuals.

Given your diagnosis clomid seems a odd choice: I think some doctors prescribe clomid as a matter of course. I think ivf is worth at least a couple of rounds for someone in your position. 

Biddy


----------



## Jumanji (Feb 13, 2008)

Hi Fox,

I think it's very hard listening to the statistics and also very misleading.  Remember you are totally unique and it's actually impossible for the doctors to give you an accurate "percentage chance" because they do not each and every factor about you which may impact your chances.  Plus, as technology in this area gets better all the time, even the best estimates go out of date quickly!

Nothing in this life is guaranteed but a 20% estimate really isn't too bad.  My sister was given less than 10% and she managed a BFP on her first go.  Other people may be given much better odds but are unsuccessful.  

If you decide to give it a go then stay positive but don't lose sight of what you have in your quest for what you want. 

good luck.


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

Thank all so much for your feedback, it's much appreciated. It really does help me!

My DH and I have talked about it a lot and taking into consideration everything (including feedback on here) we have decided to try IVF. If I am honest I am REALLY not looking forward to it. I've been prodded and poked around enough! I don't like going into the unknown and I'm really worried how I am going to cope with the whole procedure etc. Clomid was bad enough! I am assuming the side effects of the drugs for IVF are worse than those of Clomid? 

Francie - sorry to hear you have not been one of the lucky ones  . What do you plan to do now?


----------



## biddy2 (Apr 21, 2008)

Hello FoxB

I had clomid for IUI... I hated it: it made me bloat and tired me out. The drug used for ivf I found much kinder. You'll be on a low dose if you have polycystic ovaries. IVF is invasive, but then so are pregnancy and childbirth and all the procedures that surround them. I ruled out ivf... God knows how I wound up doing two rounds! I really didn't find it that bad. Of course the fact that it worked gives me a brighter opinion of it. Lots of luck to you


----------



## whippet (Dec 29, 2007)

Hi Fox we were given a 26% chance at our clinic which is about the same as you. 1st cycle we got zero fertilisation 2nd cycle switched to ICSI and now nearly 6 weeks pregnant. You need to have a PMA the journey is mentally cruel but soooooooooo worth it. Good luck

whippet x


----------



## sallywags (Jun 27, 2005)

Try to put it in perspective - it's 20% on IVF, but only 30% for a 'normal' couple to conceive by natural means on any given month...

so not so bad really? (ok, obviously each cycle with IVF is a lot more expensive than conceiving naturally, but it puts it into perspective a little!!)


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

I heard it was actually 20% Sallywag, which is good, but then I keep thinking it takes an average of 6 months for a 'healthy' couple to fall pregnant... I know I'm not thinking positively but I feel after so many BFN I find it a tad easier to deal with if I expect it to be a BFN. 3 times I thought I was pregnant, only to find out that I wasn't and I felt empty and so upset. Is this making sense?!

Whippet - what's a PMA? I am scared of going through all of this and not having anything to show for it at the end so to speak, not sure I could cope with that. It wouldn't be so worth it then! I'm also scared of hospitals, I'm a chicken. Congratulations on your pregnancy by the way. And to you too biddy2.


----------



## whippet (Dec 29, 2007)

Fox PMA is Positive Mental Attitide. Wish there were guarantees in this game but there isnt all in all its a personal thing yes it may not work but for us at least we would have tried all options available to us. Good luck in what you decide

whippet x


----------



## biddy2 (Apr 21, 2008)

Ivf is an exercise in expectation management. The way I got through was to assume it wasn't going to work! And that I was doing it for some sense of closure, and that I was doing it for the experience blah balh. Of course at the back of all this doom and gloom a small furry thing called hope keeps jumping up and down waving a massive banner. I am a largely positive person... i think that most people who tackle ivf are: you have to be able to look at the odds and go 'i'll have that!'

The average couple are a myth. The mean is the wrong sort of average to apply: those of us who have been trying for years are skewing the stats! Most people who have normal fertility and are doing it right get pregnant within three months. ARGHHH. I just think it's preposterous that you can get pregnant by HAVING SEX! why didn't I think of that?

Biddy


----------



## sallywags (Jun 27, 2005)

Biddy - lol,  i know i shouldn't laugh, but when you put it like that i couldn't help it!! aw i know what you mean... grr, very frustrating.

Fox - it makes complete sense, hun, but just trying to retain that PMA!!!!


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

Yes, I know what you mean Whippet, I don't want to get to 40 (always said I would stop ttc at 40, also said I wouldn't want to go for IVF!) and regret not trying everything. We've decided that mid July is the best time for us to start. Let's hope we get a BFP!


----------



## suemac38 (Mar 28, 2007)

Fox

Everything crossed for you hun       

Sue X


----------



## whippet (Dec 29, 2007)

Fox   you get a BFP good luck honey

whippet x


----------



## samper (Aug 16, 2006)

Hi Fox

We have spoken before on the Manchester Care girls thread and I just wanted to respond to your 'My DH and I have talked about it a lot and taking into consideration everything (including feedback on here) we have decided to try IVF. If I am honest I am REALLY not looking forward to it. I've been prodded and poked around enough! I don't like going into the unknown and I'm really worried how I am going to cope with the whole procedure etc. Clomid was bad enough! I am assuming the side effects of the drugs for IVF are worse than those of Clomid? ' comment.

In all honesty I found clomid to have an horrendous impact on my mental attitude it made me feel helpless and hopeless. As soon as I started IVF my PMA improved radically- because CARE MCR generally prescribe an short protocol antagonist cycle the side effects are absolutely minimal and you are there every other day having a scan and blood test so it makes you feel that you are finally taking some control over your fertility...

YES, it is a rollercoaster. There ARE some real lows. BUT it is positive action and if nothing else the first cycle is hugely helpful for diagnostic purposes.

If I can give you any helpful advice, it would be

1. Don't tell anyone when you are having treatment if you can avoid it- it will only add to the pressure you will already feel.

2. Set yourself either a time limit or a number of treatments you are prepared to go through. (What this is should be entirely up to you)

3. Don't dwell on the 20% you aren't a statistic you are a person and have as much chance as anyone else. Stay positive but expect to have some bad times along the way and allow yourslef to feel sorry for yourself when these happen.

I really hope you go for it. I thought I would never have a child but I am now trully blessed and I am SO VERY glad I persevered.

Good luck and stay in touch

Sam

PS sorry for the long post.


----------



## chandelle (Mar 28, 2007)

Hi Fox, is that 20% based on their success rate for your age group or estimated from their analysis of your FSH level, etc? just curious.

I think you're right to give it a shot, and your reaction to the drugs should also give you more information about your ovarian reserves. After my two attempts, i was told my reserves appeared to be very poor indeed and the kind consultant said my chances of IVF working had dropped to 5%, based on that. Amazingly i got a natural BFP that same month, so it goes to show you just need that one good egg to emerge, no matter how it is coaxed out of hiding.

As for side effects, i only had clomid for three months and didn't have major side effects, but they were still more than what i had on the high IVF doses. When i first saw one of the kit bags you get with needles and everything i was totally freaked out but actually it all turned out to be quite easy and not a big deal.

best of luck.

xC


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

Thank you all again for your feedback. I checked to see if I had any messages over the last few days and stupidly didn't see that there was a second page - doh! 

I'm feeling a bit better about the whole thing now. I've listened to all your comments and although still wishing with every ounce of my being that I fall pregnant before we start IVF I'm generally feeling a bit more positive about the treatment. 

I'm in a bit of a rush as DH is waiting downstairs for me, we're going out for tea. I shall pop back in when I have more time.

Thanks again all, you've been a great help. x


----------



## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

I have been given less than 5% but it didn't stop me trying again adn still persuing things - at the end of the day there are 5 women holding babies out of all of us who cycled that day with my age and fetilty profile so it could be me! It wasn't me this time.
My acupuncturist said to me 'Why should it work the odds are 80% against you but it does and someone has to get the BFP for the stats to stack up.

Good Luck
L x


----------



## FoxB (Mar 3, 2008)

JJ1 - very true! Sending you, and the rest on here still ttc loads of         ........

Chandelle - We didn't tell anyone that we were ttc (especially family!) for many reasons. But as the years have gone on and no BFP it got harder and harder to deal with their comments, 'you're leaving it a bit late if you want to start a family aren't you?', 'you'll regret not having kids y'know' blah blah blah... So, we decided to tell everyone when the opportunity arose. Besides some family members using our sad news as a piece of hot gossip I actually feel a bit better now that they know. I agree with you though, not to tell anyone when we start IVF. A few friends know we are thinking about it but I don't want to tell them when we are starting. As for my family, we told them from the beginning that we haven't told them so they can interfere and that we won't be giving them an announcement every time we have appointments, treatment etc. We just told them to stop the comments and that we still like to keep it a private matter just between us both. So hopefullly they won't be asking! Well, they haven't done so far anyway. 

We are thinking of trying 3 times at the moment. That may change if things don't go to plan. 

I shall try and stop concentrating on the stats and start concentrating on getting a BFP!! 

Thanks again xx


----------

