# ****** off with ignorance



## anicca79 (Sep 29, 2012)

Hi all, so I've had one too many 'why are you bothering with all that? Why don't you just find some guy and get a turkey baster? questions tonight. No disrespect to anyone doing home insemination but I bet you all thought long and hard about your donor! I can't stand the implication that we are somehow absurdly rich and stupid with our money to go the clinic route. As if we haven't considered all our options carefully and chosen the only viable one for us! So it goes without saying the comment comes from an ignorant straight person who assumes it's all so easy and without any legal or health implications or anything else. I don't know why it's got to me tonight, but maybe it's the fact that both my wife and I are working so hard to afford our first IUI. Has anyone else felt frustrated with this? Thanks for letting me rant


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## Ivfmamma (Jun 10, 2012)

Hi anicca, I can't be much help really but i just wanted to say ignore the idiots with stupid comments, I get ridiculous things said to me like maybe your doing it on the wrong days (after 10 years ttc & no Fallopian tubes I don't think that's a possibility lol) i don't even hold an ivf conversation with anyone 'fertile' anymore because I get fed up of them not understanding.

best of luck to you & your wife for your iui x x


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## incywincy (Nov 13, 2011)

If you ask me you should just go out and have a one night stand.


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## Nosilab (Jun 29, 2011)

Oh that's just awful annica!  Some people can be so rude and insensitive    I can't believe some of the things that come out of people's mouths!  Sadly I don't really have any wise words of wisdom, but maybe next time you get a comment like that you could just reply with something like "no thanks, that might be what you'd choose to do if in the same situation, but my wife and I are taking this very seriously and this is very important to us so we're making the right decision for us, this isn't a game or joke to us!" i.e. also translates as "mind your own business!"    Next time someone asks me if we're going to adopt (as if that's as simple as choosing to go to the local shops for a pint cf milk!) I plan on saying "no, have you?!".  Oh I wish we didn't all have to put up with all these insensitive comments, it makes me so angry, as if all this isn't hard enough to deal with.

Good luck to you both for your upcoming IUI.  Have blown you some bubbles for luck! xx


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## anicca79 (Sep 29, 2012)

Thanks all for your lovely supportive comments and good wishes! I feel better now. Yeah, starting to thinking not talking about it so much is a good idea. It's hard when it's on your mind so much though   I wish more people would think before they opened their mouths but then I'm sure I can be insensitive too at times. I guess I'm realising how personal it feels and how much it can affect me. Best wishes to all x


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

We didn't tell anyone for those reasons. You can't avoid it though as when you do get pregnant, you have to answer similar questions ie. how did you get pregnant? Who'd the father (honestly) & doesn't your partner want to be pregnant? The quesiton we get now of course is - who's baby is he? OURS!


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## Ticky (Feb 21, 2012)

Sorry to butt in but welshgine do people seriously ask you that?? I get that some people may think it to themselves but to actually ask who's child it is   im angry for you!!!!!x


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## ameliaK (Sep 23, 2010)

My worst new comment was from a lesbian friend. When I was in deep distress that we weren't going to be able to conceive with my eggs and the next step was coming to terms with double donation, she said "I'm not surprised you're upset, I mean you might get a monster".   Wha?!!! She's lost the title of friend - lol.


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