# Embryos better each IVF but should i go on at 43??



## suma22 (Nov 30, 2011)

Hi Ladies
I was hoping for some advice please as i dont know what to do....

Ive had 3 IVF cycles in the last year, all BFN. The first i got 7 eggs collected but only 3 were viable as the other were 'fragile; (this was with a more aggressive protocol which obv doesnt suit my age or eggs!), 2 fertilised and 1 was chromosomally normal (CGH testing) but quite fragmented. 
I then went to another clinic and was put on flare protocol which suited me much better and i got 5 mature eggs, 3 fertilised and 2 put in but slightly fragemented. 
This time i got 6 mature, 4 fertilised and 3 put in. They said 2 of the 3 were the highest quality they ever got and i was excited, but again BFN 2 days ago and utterly devastated. Im pretty sure the acupuncture i had improved the quality this time. I have other underlying issues (NK cells, thyoid disorder and low ferritin (though all seem to have been addressed - prenisolone, clexane, thyroxin etc).There may be others i dont even know about, and i only discovered these from my own research and then getting the tests myself - doctors just dont seem to look take much initiative ive found, you have to do all the legwork yourself!!

I was wondering if anyone had any thoughts on carrying on considering my age? The eggs/embyos seem to improve each time but am i just kidding myself it will work next time? We dont have endless funds but could this work or should i go donor? I am so unsure and dont have anyone to talk through this with (hubbyis supportive but doesnt want to spend hours thinking about it like i do!).

Any advice gratefully received, whatever your thoughts, i wont be offended!

Thanks
Suma xx


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## Maisyz (Dec 15, 2010)

It depends hunny on how you feel and only you can decide. Personally I only want my own child so will never consider donor egg (will prepare to receive loads of abuse and hate mail now etc) but that's just my view.

It really does take one good embryo to work and it sounds like you have had loads of tests so hopefully all the issues have been found and solved.

Like I say only you can decide but good luck x


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## CharlieClarke (Apr 9, 2012)

Hi Suma

I agree with Maisy as only you can decide how you feel. 
I'm 42, Beginning of the year had my first ivf, twins implanted but lost them both. Had tests as I have had several mc and I have thrombophilia, a problem with one of my genes and protein C. So second round they changed my protocol but bfn.
We decided to see Penny at Serum and discovered that I have hidden C and DP sperm is almost knackered as a result. We have just finished 6 wks of drugs to clear it up. Whilst I was there I had an aquascan and all was well inside.
Penny advised that we should now try naturally for a few months.
If that fails we will have two more goes at ivf.
If they fail, I think we will go down the doner path. I have done a lot of soul searching and have decided that I could and would love it as much as if it were my own and as much as I love my DS

It really is down to you and how you both feel.

Good Luck though


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## Chandlerino (Nov 30, 2011)

I am in the same boat so no advice really.

Have you thought of taking DHEA?


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## suma22 (Nov 30, 2011)

Thanks for your replies!

I did think i would feel weird about DE but now i think i would be OK as its growing inside you and would feel like part of you anyway. I worry i go down that route though, only to find that its something in my body thats stopping this working, that they/I havent discovered yet! Yes i worry a lot! There are lots of autoimmune disease in my family and although i have lots of tests, what if there's one crucial thing thats been missed? Im also intolerant to dairy/eggs (though not allergic, just get fast heart rate and bloated/tired) so wonder if i need to totally cut these out too. I also think too much too!

Sorry to be ignorant but what is an aquascan....intrigued!! And what is hidden C?

Yes i was on DHEA from Jan to Jun this year, this may also have helped with the egg quality as there is a fertility expert that thinks that it takes 8 months for your eggs to be optimum, not 3-4 as most people think? Who knows?! 

I truly hope you all get your baby wishes 

Suma xx


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## Maisyz (Dec 15, 2010)

Well if you're happy with donor, go donor. They always say it is virtually guarunteed to work (though I know women who are into double figure cycles on donor and still no BFP)


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## suma22 (Nov 30, 2011)

Hi yes, Im happy to do it if its the last option but obv i would, more than anything in the world, prefer my own biological. Why are there so many difficult decisions to make?!!!

xx


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## CharlieClarke (Apr 9, 2012)

Hidden C is chlamydia 

I tested negative as a routine test before starting ivf. When I contacted Penny she asked me to send a sample of period blood and that came back positive. Its high up in the uterus and missed by normal testing. She feels that I have had it for a while. One of the indicators was that my period often starts with brown blood and is lumpy instead of fluid. Whilst there we had the sperm DNA tested and it was 14, anything over 15 is fragmented apparently. Penny felt that the hidden C was responsible for this.
This was never picked up by my clinic here.

Lets just hope that the drugs have worked now!


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## everhopeful1234 (Jan 29, 2009)

Hi Suma

My thoughts are with you at this emotional time.  When I started IVF I was 44.  I initially wanted to use only my own eggs so tried twice and each time the IVF failed.  I then went on to use one cycle of donor egg which failed and then I did another cycle (all over a 4 year period and I had fibroids so I had two operations imbetween to remove them) and then I got pregnant.  I am now 48 and have had a fantastic little boy last January 2012.  I believe that what helped me was eating sensibly, not smoking, not drinking, having acupuncture up to 5 months before and using donor egg from a very young girl of 26 who had had children before.  She was doing IVF because her husband had a problem not her.  I believe the younger the donor egg the better.  Ideally we all would want to use our own eggs but I can only tell you that everyone says he looks like me, and I could not love him any more.  It truly makes no difference but age is not on our side when we hit 40.  I truly wish you luck and go for it.  It worked for me so I am sure it would work for you.  The other thing is I went to the Lister Hospital and was guided by Mr Hassam Abdullah who truly is a fantastic man.  Not only is he clever and wise, he gives you proper advise.

Hope and kisses for you.

Everhopeful1234 xx


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## Surfergirl (Apr 30, 2010)

Hi Suma,

I too am pregnant using donor eggs. I am over the moon and cannot imagine feeling any differently if I were
carrying my own genetic child. It is very personal though and so I can understand how Maisyz feels (no abuse, honest!!) I was horrified when it was first mentioned to me but I quickly realised it was my best chance. My friend has two DE children as her own biological child died of a genetic problem and she adores them, which I always find very humbling as that must be extremely hard. She has no fertility problems but knows she can't take the risk.

I would have loved my own genetic child but, sadly, no matter how many pills or potions you take you cannot replace lost eggs. Us ladies weren't very well designed in that way! But then I bet my FSH and AMH is worse than all the ladies on this thread! I agree with Everhopeful.

Good luck xx


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## Ellie.st (Mar 11, 2005)

Dear Suma

Only you can make the decision but if you are responding better as your tx goes on and if you can face it emotionally and financially, maybe it is worth having another go with your own eggs, even if it is just for "closure", before you make a decision about DE.  I can see that you have obviously had alot of tests already but perhaps it is worth seeing if there are any other possible factors you can investigate before you embark on another cycle.  (I did this between my second and third cycles and you're right, it does involve alot of legwork!). Also, if you think eggs/dairy might be a factor, try cutting them out for a bit and/or during your next tx. (I am a great believer in listening to what your body is telling you.  ).  

My own response to tx (egg quality and fertilisation rates) certainly improved cycle by cycle between the ages of 41 to (almost) 43 and I now have a DD and a DS from my OE after almost giving up.  So much depends on your own personal circumstances and how you respond to tx, but if you are producing good embies, then I would say it is worth another go if you feel that it is the right thing to do for you.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.    

Ellie


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