# Dummies!



## pyjamas (Jun 24, 2011)

LO has been using dummies as she was used to having them at FC so continued when she came to us 10 months ago. Would appreciate some advice to wean her off them. She needs them at the moment to go to sleep with and in the car but does not look for them at home during the day. She is now 22 months old x


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## Sq9 (Jan 15, 2013)

Our lo is 25 months and still has hers to get to sleep and sometimes if she's very upset, usually due to teeth, or very tired. I'm kind of in denial about it and hoping she'll just wake up one day and not want it anymore 😆. Clearly that isn't going to happen so will be reading this thread with much interest 😊


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## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

spot got bored with dummies on his own ages ago, but i wish he still had one as he just chews everything else. he's also 22 months. 
i would say don't worry about it yet, they will probably give it up in time, just don't make a thing about it. easier to deal with a dummy than be constantly drying out toys, blankets, coats, whatever they have decided to chew on. every day something is soaked in dribble. at least a dummy you can wash and dry easily.


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

We got rid of the dummy for little pink at 3, I would have done it sooner but her little brother had/s one so I thought it would be unfair. Actually it was good waiting in the sense that I could ensure she was weaned off it enough that she only needed it for sleep, and also I could explain to her what was happening. I drip fed it up to her birthday and then on her birthday we left the dummy out on the table for the dummy fairy. We agreed she was a big 3 year old now (luckily she was motivated by the desire to be a big girl - I know thi isn't always the case) and didn't need a dummy, but that the dummy fairy would take it for the little babies. I (the dummy fairy!)!left her some fairy stickers, some chocolate stars and sprinkled glitter on the table, and left a thank you note. She was delighted. Until bed time that is. Then she was devastated and I felt awful 😢 I had made sure I had thrown them away in the bin at asda so no temptation! She went to bed sucking her blanket that night. It took a week of reassurance and repeating the story but then she was fine, she happy fetches her brothers for him now and doesn't bat an eyelid. Good luck! xxx


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## ciacox (May 31, 2013)

Our LO is 16 months old and was placed last week. He has a dummy and - while I'm obviously not planning on taking it away from him anytime soon - I have been thinking about how to get him off it during the day in the long term. I read that it's helpful to 'condition a new transitional object', which basically means swap it for a teddy/blankey or something. The idea is to bring a favourite teddy (or whatever) into play time, to snuggle with it when they feel sad, to put it to bed with them. Ideally they then move off the dummy onto  that. Will be interested to hear if it works! Obviously if it's a comfort when teething that's not really going to help!


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## Lorella (Jan 10, 2013)

This is what we did to be dummy free by 20 months:

She had dummy on a blanket from birth up to a few months into being home with us. 
We then swapped that for a normal dummy. 
Then we slowly weaned her off it in the day - she didn't seem to bothered so was easier for us (this was around 14 months). 
Then she just had it for sleeping and in the car. So next we dropped it from the car, then from afternoon nap and then from nighttime. 

To help stopping the dummy in the cot I first just left the dummy at the end of her cot rather than put her to bed with it in her mouth. I just said its there if you want it. I didn't make a big thing of it.  Then I realise she was often scrambling around for it so I put two in and thus worked really well. Then I think one day I just took them out for nap time. After she got used to not having them for nap it was quite easy. A few weeks after that I took them out at night. I don't think she really noticed!

I will say that she wasn't totally attached to her dummy so it made it easier. 

I will also say though that she puts her fingers in her mouth a lot and has always been a major dribbler!


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Dreading it with my little boy   He was premature so pretty much had a dummy forced on him to teach him how to suck.... Now he's a bit obsessed. HV said to go cold turkey but I'm a bit rubbish....!!


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

I need to stop DS having his...he's 3 and a half now! But I feel so mean, he loves his dummy   

I did read somewhere that chopping a little bit off the end of the dummies helps. They lose the suck, so the kids just lose interest. I think I've left that one a bit late though, as he'd just demand a new one now


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## Sq9 (Jan 15, 2013)

Love the idea of the dummy fairy - anything with sparkle works for me 😆 xx


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Ah yes, we all need some sparkle in our lives 😊👍xxx


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

mine both arrived with dummies..but only for sleep and sometimes in the car. they were very much in the routine of put it on the shelf as sson as they got up from a nap and get it down only when about to go to bed. I actually really loved them having them, it made night time and nap time so smooth..time for nap, dummy in, striaght to sleep, ditto bedtime. it was their sign to sleep..fab!
I weaned DD off hers around 3, she was able to be reasoned with and we posted them off to the 'babies that havent got any dummies" (Grandmas) She was a bit sad the first night hwen reality hit in but otherwise took it like a pro. didn't her brother still having his. 
With DS i tried the same approach around 3. It completely ruined his sleep and he has had trouble settling down ever since ..he's now 8... I think it soothed him really well and he was able to calm down enough to drop off. without it he was stuffed. 
Interestingly DD wanted a dummy back when she was about 7..she talked about it for a while and thenone day she heard we were popping into Mothercare, grabbed her purse and said I want to buy me and DS a dummy again. So she did! she was somewhat dismayed that it was quite difficult to keep it in with her now larger mouth but it didnt deter her. However I just allowed her it for having story at bedtime and then it had to go away. I kind of hoped it might help DS settle better again but it didint. Now at age 10 she still now sometimes like to snuggle up with it when we read a bedtime story!
so we kinda went full circle with it  

kj x


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

LO1 came home with one aged 10mths. He mostly had it for naps, tiredness/upset i.e. new situations. We kept them out of sight and only used them for sleeping, then a week after he turn two we got rid of them. As soon as he turned 2, we started making a big fuss about what a big boy he was and that dummies were for babies, then gathered them all up a week later and said we were giving them to the babies cause he was a big boy. He went to bed beautifully. He asked for it and was a little tearful on the 3rd night but never looked back. 
The ONLY reason we took the them away however, was because he was waking up 3 times a night because he'd lost his dummy and no other reason so it had become a hindrance rather than a help. He also has a special teddy to cuddle and a soft blanket he doesn't sleep without. I'd advise getting LO to pick or make at make-a-bear-workshop their own special teddy to act as a comforter before taking anything away.


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

I was always really unconventional about dummies, in that I never wanted to use one, but defended to the hilt Bug's right to use one if he wanted!  When other mummies would encourage me to get rid of it, I'd just say I wasn't in the business of taking away things that offered him comfort.  But by the stage people were commenting he was only using it at bedtime anyway.  His favourite one got bitten through when he was four-something, so he pretty much decided himself that was it.  He only asked for it twice and that was that.

But then, I sucked my thumb into my twenties (and no, I don't have a horrific overbite) so I'm a bit skewed on the issue!

If it had been affecting his sleep, speech or teeth we'd have tackled it, but his sleep and settling was much better for it (I still miss the sight of popping it into his mouth after cuddles and story time, and watching his eyes basically instantly roll back in his head.....!  LOL!), his speech was always great and his teeth were already ruined in foster care, so there was nothing to lose there.

Plus, we'd had a couple of times where the "you're getting to be a big boy" had actually caused anxiety and a wish to be babied again, so we knew that approach wouldn't be helpful for him.

As with everything, each child (and each parent!) is different, and it's just a matter of finding the best fit for them.    I'm interested to see how Bug reacts when Monkey turns up with a dummy!


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