# i dont know what to do...(baby mentioned)



## x shye x (Jan 24, 2006)

Hi ladies seems like a lifetime since ive posted on here   ... i egg shared 3 years ago and had a BFP i started off with twins and sadly lost 1 but had my other bean which was a boy his adorable and im so thankful that i egg shared not only did we get our baby but i gave someone else there dream to have a baby  .
i now feel like i want to do it again but im so scared of it not working and the fears and worries i had last time, previous to egg sharing i had a BFN with ivf and it set me back alot i was very depressed and sad for a long time. I have a 11 year old that was a natural pregnancy and my 3 year old was ivf-eggshare and now them feelings of ahving another is creeping back.... i feel dreadful even talking about a 3rd baby when im aware of the pain others are going through that dont have any..

i feel so useless when i have so many friends that get pregnant at the click of a finger, often with no thought for ladies like ourselfs.. it seems so cruel that we cant just have sex and fall pregnant   im so scared to go back of the journey of ivf... i loved this website but i dont come on very much and i get so upset reading peoples posts and it brings back the feeling i felt when it wasnt happening for me and i felt like i wasnt a women becos i couldnt just have sex and fall pregnant..

i suppose the question im asking is do i go for eggshare again or do i try to forget and be very happy wiv my 2 boys x i sometimes dont know if the twin i lost which im so convinced was a little girl is making me want to have another as i feel guilty that my little bean didnt stay   .. im really confused, my DH really wants me to try again and often says it would be like bringing Shye back which is the name of the twin we lost and that really hits my heart...? can someone give me some advice as i feel bit lonely and confused... please i hope no-one thinks im being selfish putting this post, theres not one day that i dont sit and realise how happy i am and how sad also it is for the ladies that are trying for a baby. i will never forget that feeling in a million years.. xxxxxx

thanks 
shye xxxx


----------



## Mrs B (was Mrs B to be) (Dec 4, 2009)

Shye,

So sorry to hear you lost one of your twins    My FSH was too high to have IVF but amazingly I got pg naturally just as I had pretty much given up all hope and was looking into donor egg IVF - I was told that the waiting list was very very long as very few women donate their eggs. If you are feeling strong enough to go through the IVF again, then donating eggs would be a wonderful gift to someone who is on one of those long waiting lists. I thank God every day for my little miracles but had I not been so lucky I would have been hoping for someone like you to donate their eggs.

Only you and dh can decide, you have had both success and failure on IVF so maybe your outlook will be different this time?

xx


----------



## wishing4miracle (Sep 7, 2006)

Hello. I dont know if you remember me as we were once lister girl es thread buddies.and we sound v much alike now.yes we have our boys but would love another and thats why im egg sharin again this yr(which i can now say as its ny lol).im excited but also v scared.im worried about if it will work or not.also if it works how il be through a pg and after pg.purely because i had bad spd from 14wks and had pnd after and i worries me to think i might feel like that again.i feel v blessed to have our boys but my heart craves and yearns for another baby especialy a girlmit hurts knowin we may never have that chance.so we are tryin again in march april time.we are doin it sooner rather than later as im not gettin any younger at 28 and theres no qaurantees of it workin anyway.i know its goin to be hard but im hopin i can get through it all if it does or doesnt work.


----------

