# In shock



## Hoppity (Mar 19, 2012)

We went to a GP for the first time last month since ttc.

My bloods all came back normal.

DP SA results yesterday. Been told virtually non-existent chance of us conceiving naturally.

Will have exact figures/report friday.

Am in shock. I'm devastated, we both are. We just thought we were being impatient! It explains a lot, DP is feeling so responsible. It's so hard for the men.

Just feels like all our hopes and dreams have been snatched away. I know there's answers, and solutions, and miracles. I just didn't expect this. I thought I could be put on clomid or something and the problem would be fixed. I'm one of 5 siblings I've dreamed of having a big family for as long as I can remember. I was good, went to Uni, got a career and always thought when the time is right I'll have a family with the man I love.  

I know we're young I'm only 30 DP 34 just cannot imagine what the next few years will hold for us. 

What gives me hope is reading everyone's miracles and success stories on here I just pray we will be blessed too.


----------



## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

Hoppity - I could have written your post my luv..... having spent years tring to get pregnant, my one and only natural pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage, but it was the miscarriage which literally opened up all the doors for us on our fertility journey.  I had my own issues, but we just thought the hospital and gp were being thorough with gp's SA tests, cos we'd been fobbed off 5 years earlier!!! - we were eventually referred for IUI, but it wasn't until we got to the appointment that we were given the devastating news that he couldnt help as hubby had a zero count.... to say our world crumbled around us was an understatement.  

I was stunned and hubby was shattered - but as you say, it answered a lot ! - we bearly heard what the consultant said following that, he mentioned icsi might be our only option with a surgical sperm extraction - my tear filled eyes and attention were firmly fixated on the leaflet the nurse had handed me - "Coping with Childlesness"!!!!!

Hubby was very hard on himself - but like everything that had happened up until that point - we would be ok if we were together.  
I read up on TESA/PESA here on FF (on the Mens thread) and it gave us hope reading the success stories - lots of the couples on the thread were raving about Wellman Multivitamins made by Vitabiotics and the effect it had had on their 'counts'.  Our clinic refused point blank to do the surgical sperm extraction and instead added us to a 6 month waiting list for a sperm donor.  In the meantime, hubby and I got ourselves in tip top shape physically and mentally - by the time we got to ec - hubby had a million beautiful little swimmers - and we're only too delighted to share our success story.

I was terrified going into my first round of treatment at 39 - but my gorgeous daughter was gonna be the bestest 40th birthday pressie I could ever have wished for.... don't give up hope - and the ladies (and gents) here on FF are wonderfully supportive.... anything you want or need just shout.

Best wishes
Sheila


----------



## Honor77 (Jan 12, 2011)

Hi *Hoppity*,

So sorry to hear you're having such a hard time .

It would be interesting if you could update tomorrow with some actual results. I say this because we found that our consultant was quite negative about our chances from the outset. My tests were initially indicating problems with egg reserves and immediately he was talking donor eggs; DH's test results were also far from great (low count and poor morphology). Further tweaking with my thyroid (known and treated issues at time) and he changed his tune, but further testing for DH established ASA and resulted in consultant saying ICSI would be our only chance of conceiving. Fair enough, we'd been ttc naturally for over 2 years with not even a hint of luck.

The cycle was horrendous, as I responded poorly. We got there in the end, even got a BFP but then had an early miscarriage.

After being told before starting treatment that we had a "5% chance of conceiving naturally within the next 12 months", lo and behold within 12 months we _did_ in fact conceive naturally!

So, please continue to fight, and to hope . If you've had your tests done via your GP, ask for a referral to a fertility clinic - if so far tests seem to show that there's a "virtually non-existent chance" of conceiving naturally, this does not mean that you don't have any chance of conceiving at all. A fertility clinic will probably repeat any tests already carried out (in particular DH should have ca. 3 semen analyses to get a better idea of his fertility, as sperm regenerates itself on a kind of 3-monthly cycle and can vary from cycle to cycle) and carry out more in-depth investigations. There's every chance you could do ICSI, and come through the other end with a BFP, or, who knows, even conceive a natural miracle - you never know!

Good luck!

xxx

P.S.: *Sheilaweb*: Lovely to read your success story . xxx


----------



## jayden and Bella (Mar 27, 2012)

Hi Hoppity
I know how you feel my daughter went threw simular thing she has pcos and her husband low sperm count poor motability and they were told would never conceive naturally. he blamed himself and ended their engagement said she could do better than him but she reasuured him that they would get threw it together. booked the wedding and went threw 2nd unsucessful icis treatment and then discovered she was pregnant naturally.  she went on to have a beautiful daughter bella in november 2010.  she was just about to start the fertility roller coster again (appointment booked 16th April 2012)when she had a shock natural pregnancy again, so never give up miracles can happen.


----------



## Hoppity (Mar 19, 2012)

Ladies thank you so much for lifting my spirits and sharing your stories, so wonderful to read and prove that miracles do happen!

We have our appointment tomorrow (only with GP, I assume to talk about results and make referral) have got so many questions, and yes I will update with actual numbers-would appreciate help interpreting them and putting the figures into perspective.

I just re-read my post-I sound so sorry for myself and selfish, I need to perk up to support my partner, he is taking the news very bad. 

I will stay strong and hopeful, thanks again ladies  

Jules


----------



## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

Jules we're here for you and your partner anytime..... I dunno if he;d be interested, but the guys in the mens room are lovely and very supportive.

We've all had a good kicking in our time and needed the support of the lovely folks here on FF....

Sending you both huge hugs
Sheila


----------



## Hoppity (Mar 19, 2012)

Honor & Sheilaweb (and anyone else who understands all these numbers!)

Got a print out of the report. Not sure if some of the numbers are better or worse than we thought. This GP says it's not impossible to conceive but quite unlikely.

What do you think?

count 4.6mil
abnormal viscosity
agglutination absent
motile 27%/immotile 73%
progressive 16% (of 27%)
vitality-count too low to assess % alive
abnormal forms 95%

I agree the outlook is poor.

Good news my DP is now being referred to urologist, bad news is they won't refer us to fertility clinic until all urology tests done.

more waiting...

I feel stronger today to support him...and this sounds odd but I feel a weight has lifted now I can stop being so excited waiting for my period (not) to arrive and then so crushingly disappointed when it does arrive. Feels like I can manage my hopes and expectations better now. Does that make sense?

Jx


----------



## Honor77 (Jan 12, 2011)

Hi *Hoppity*,

Thanks for updating with your DP's results. It's great the your GP is saying it's not impossible to conceive - as we found out, even a tiny percentage chance of it happening IS better than none! Add to that that you're likely to be referred for IVF, and that will automatically increase your chances of having a baby. It's a good idea for your DP to see an urologist - they may be able to find something that can be "fixed" and consequently improve any further semen analysis results. Just a pain, I know, when this means even more delays... Any ideas how long it'll take for an appointment to come through for that?

The main thing is you're now seeing the right people and getting the right tests, it'll all be worth it in the end! And in the meantime, keep hoping for that little miracle!

xxx


----------

