# Is it possible to love a child that doesn't exist yet?



## Idreamofleah (Dec 6, 2014)

Ok so I don't know if I'm going a little bit mad but I feel like I know my future child already. Like I have a connection to her and I know her name. I'm not pregnant and never have been yet, but I feel like she's out there, somewhere and the pain of not being able to find her is what's making me sad. I constantly ask her in my mind why won't you come to me? Why arn't you here yet? I realise writing this makes me sound pretty mad but I just wondered if anyone else felt like this....or what it means. An quite new to this infertility world so not sure what's normal and what's not x


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## missowen (Feb 22, 2014)

There's a book called 'Spirit Babies' that I think you might like. It's by a medium who claimed that the spirits of babies travel with their parents before they are born. If you read that book what you're feeling will make perfect sense. Even if you don't end up believing in it I've been told it's still a very good read. As no one can prove it one way or the other why not believe something so lovely?


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## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

i think that's lovely. when i was ttc i struggled all the time with the fact i couldn't imagine my child's face... i had no idea what they would be like, i could imagine myself as a mother but not imagine the child and it scared me because i thought i ought to be able to.  i think it's lovely that you feel this connection. i hope you find her soon. have you tried meditation? there are so many unknowns out there. so many strange connections. so much to wonder about.


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

When I was TTC, I would feel like I had a connection to a child - a boy. I would oftern dream of him and my exH.
Having a family life. Had a name. Looked exactly like his father and had the same cheeky personality.
I never told anyone LOL   They would think i was psycho
Ive not been able to fall pregnant either


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## missowen (Feb 22, 2014)

Psycho is a bit strong Sophie ! Nothing wrong with dreaming. Sorry to read your sig, you've bean thru a v tough time


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## sophiekh (Mar 12, 2014)

thanks missownen, what doesnt kill makes you stronger i hope


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## Haydan (Oct 12, 2013)

i feel that way all the time


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## Daisy38 (Oct 25, 2010)

Hello,

In answere to the question massive YES in my mind that's why infertility is so painful, becuase I had grieve for the loss of the child that I couldn't bring to life.

This includes embryo's that didn't make it, as well as not having the capacity to naturally bring my children to life for the many years before I was able to have them.

Daisy xxx


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## LittleL77 (Jul 14, 2012)

There could be something in this. I imagined what my baby would look like when I was pregnant and when I gave birth I was right!!! I felt like I already knew her x


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## missowen (Feb 22, 2014)

Ah how lovely Little 77. This is such a lovely thread.


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