# Am I mad wanting no 3?



## REDHAY (Apr 12, 2006)

Hi

I had ICSI for DS 1 and naturally conceived DS 2 (which was a huge shock), now I find myself wanting no 3!  Am I mad, has anyone had a 3rd?  Does it make life even harder?  We dont know if we would be able to conceive no 3 anyhow as it took 3 years of no contraception until I fell pg with no 2.  I did however have an early mis in June, so am hoping that it will happen.  However everyone I tell that I'd like another, the response is always so negative  
Confused? I am  

Red


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## cookies81 (Aug 24, 2009)

hi red    first of all congrats on your wonderful boys, I cant comment on whether having number 3 will make life harder or not, but I just want to say no your not mad who wouldnt want another kid, good luck on your ttc#3 and looking out for your bfp announcment!


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## ~ Chux ~ (Apr 8, 2003)

Hi Red,

Firstly, it really annoys me when people are so negative - why can't they say "how lovely", "good luck", or "wouldn't that be amazing" etc etc. Oh no, it's always "you must be mad" or "you'll have your hands full"..............arghhhhhh!!!

If you want to ttc another then don't let anyone tell you shouldn't. Of course there will be times when it is hard but you'll have those times whether you have one, two, three or more children!! I've lost count of the number of people who have told me I'm mad or that I've got my hands full but I love it and, if anything, the third was the easiest in a lot of ways - with our first I found the whole life changing thing hard along with having to build up a whole new social network and get used to my new identity (i.e. as someones Mom rather than just being me). The second was easier for me in a lot of ways as my life was already child orientated so dd had to "fit in" to our routine and the things we did, but ds1 was terribly jealous so that was hard to deal with at times. With our third, both ds1 and dd were already used to "sharing" me and dh, they had each other for company and playmates, and they were also that little bit older so were excited.

How does your dh feel about having another?

Chux xx


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## strawbs (May 16, 2005)

no comment..........broody already!!

xx


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## ~ S ~ (Oct 27, 2003)

Absolutely not! I knew from the day DS2 was born that I wanted another and those feelings just got stronger and stronger.

I totally agree with Chux in that having a 3rd was probably the easiest of all   I suppose it did start to get a bit manic once DS3 was on the move   He's now 2.5 and yes, life is bedlam, my house is a total tip most of the time, it can be chaos and very hard work but most of the time they are such good fun!!

What I do tire of (as Chux will know   ) is the constant, persistant rude comments from people about what hard work my life must be, how crazy we were, how we must have our hands full, oh poor you with 3 little boys, they look like mischief, how do you cope etc etc etc   

The only people who have ever been polite and nice about it is elderly people or people we meet whenever we've been to church services   

But remember, away from the IF/FF environment, having 3 children is really quite common and normal these days. I have several friends and acquaintances with 3 children so please don't go thinking you are mad   

S xx


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## mjp1977 (Jul 18, 2010)

Hi Ladies,

I hope you don't mind me popping in and adding a few comments!

I think it's absolutely fantastic that you want more children, you are obviously a wonderful mother and a very strong maternal instinct, as others have said, don't let anyone change your mind, if it's what you want go for it!!!   I am currently ttc#2, we were ttc#1 for just under 7 years, and we have wanted another but havent really got the room, but we have decided if we don't do it now, we never will and will always be wondering what if! I told my parents at the weekend that we are back on the drugs (Clomid and Met) to try for another and I didnt even get a response!!!! we have a gorgeous DFS (darling foster son) and at this moment in time we are looking after 2 babies through fostering, the house is chaotic but I haven't felt this alive for years, its hard work, but my how rewarding to have 4 smiling faces, laughing and happy (and only one of them is my own)  I'd love to have a big family and if I am blessed with another plus my foster son I will be soooooo happy   If anyone has anything to say, let them, theyre probably only jealous!!!

Good luck to you all

Sending lots of love


M x


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## me and my boys (Aug 2, 2010)

Morning Red, 

Just having a quick skip through the board and read your post and just wanted to say absolutely not!!!  We have 3 boys. My husband and I both have 1 from our first marriage (they are 12 & 10) and then we have our own IVF miracle who is very nearly 3. Its chaos but I so love it, saying chaos Im not sure if that’s the right word for it.  The house is full of chatter and laughter and its difficult keeping up with the kid’s social lives. Its very rarely tidy and most of the time Im shattered but wouldn’t change it for the world.

We had a really good result from the first treatment and ended up with 15 embryos in freeze. We FET a couple of months ago but not successful so we have 8 left. Anyway currently in treatment for what will be our 4th but I have to say final attempt.  Like you there are loads of people that say we are mad but I wholly disagree.  Our boys are all good, well mannered, well behaved boys. They are all happy and healthy so why not.  Sorry just got on my soap box a bit there! It’s nobody’s business but your own.  

My logic on life is that you can’t live it by what if, buts or maybes so if you want to go for it, do!

Huge hugs and positive vibes

Sharon
x


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## Barnstormer (Jun 19, 2003)

Hi Red,

Thanks so much for posting on this subject and to everyone else for their replies.

I am about to start IVF tx for potential baby no. 3 and was really worried that there weren't many other people on here that had either gone through it, or felt the same way.  The responses I've had from friends and family has been mixed so far.

I must admit reading through the boards in general that I don't feel there are many places I would feel comfortable posting though.  It's almost like I'm being greedy by trying again after managing to have two beautiful boys, but I used to always want four children before it didn't happen for us naturally.  It has taken a long time and we've certainly been through the mill in our journey, but it's easy to miss that when you see two tickers at the bottom of a profile.  Maybe I should just take them off?

Anyway, good luck to you Red if you decide to go for it again...xxx


Have decided to remove tickers after all.


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## pippilongstockings (Dec 8, 2005)

If you're mad then so am I!  I'm so so broody, I'd love another baby.  DH doesn't want another baby and to be honest, I don't really want to be pregnant again but I ache for more children.  I blame the baby hormones!!  We've agreed to talk about it again in a few months.....  Having #3 can't be as much of a shock to the system as having #2 can it??


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## REDHAY (Apr 12, 2006)

Hi lovely ladies,

Such great replies   

Firstly good luck Cookies 81 with your journey, it was very kind of you to post   

I have made up my mind and yes we are/will try for #3 Whoa!  We dont know if it will happen but I'm a huge believer in fate, we have however decided to let nature decide which means no more tx and we left our frosties go last month.  (Which was a very, very hard decision).

DH loves me being at home playing 'wifey' and TBH I'm enjoying too    So who knows I guess we'll have to wait and see x

Thanks for all your replies and good luck x

Red


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