# Just joined & wanted to talk....



## Uma (Jun 18, 2004)

Hi all

After accessing the site a few times thought it was about time I joined!

My story is DH and I were trying for a year to have children – initial tests showed I was fine and that DH may have a low sperm count, so he was referred to a specialist. In the end found DH was fine – just a one off low count. I was then referred to a specialist for further investigation. This all happened last year when I was 35. Consultant found a cyst in each of my ovaries & said routine laparoscopy would remove this. At the time this was upsetting but I thought once cysts were removed I would be able to conceive. 

After laparascopy cysts were sent for biopsy – bad news was the cysts were cancerous although the doctors thought it was still early stage. However, they could not know for certain until ovaries were removed! DH & I were devastated as ovarian cancer in someone as young of me is very rare. 

To cut a long story short after various consultations DH and I decided to take the risk of stimulating my ovaries to produce eggs for removal at same time as my ovaries to give me a chance of freezing embryos for future use if cancer was treated. I was lucky as the cancer turned out to be borderline so I didn’t need any further treatment just regular 6 monthly check ups. I also produced 9 eggs of which 8 were successfully fertilised by ICSI and frozen.

I have recently undergone FET, the first failed and I just got the results today of the second which also failed, so I am feeling pretty down. I have only 2 embryos left as 2 already died on thawing, so I am scared that these two will also. This is the last chance of having my own biological children but only if the remaining 2 embryos survive thawing.

I am confused now as I don’t know whether to consider an egg donor although it is very hard to find someone willing to do this (especially of Asian background such as myself) or to try & adopt.

Can anyone give me some advice?

Thanks

Uma x


----------



## Martha Moo (Jan 30, 2004)

Hiya Uma

I am so sorry to read of ur history here

I truly hope that ur tx is successful for you and that u r soon posting to give us positive news.

sending lots of  

If ever u fancy a chat theres always a few of us in gathering in the chat room.

Look forward to getting to know u more


----------



## Leanne (Jan 24, 2004)

Hi Uma,

Would just like to say welcome to ff. I wish you all the luck in the world. If you fancy a place to chat how about joining us on the inbetween section on the boards?

L xx


----------



## Laine (Mar 23, 2002)

Hey Uma

Welcome to FF!

You certainly have been through it.

Really hope things work out for you.

Laine x


----------



## floss (Apr 13, 2004)

Hello Uma , welcome to FF. I read you post and just had to respond. I dont know what to say but my heart goes out to you and your dh at this awful time. This whole fertility thing is awful, it puts pressure onto every aspect of our lives but we still come out fighting. I truly hope that you are 3rd time lucky!

Good Luck
Lisa x


----------



## Lilly (Apr 27, 2003)

hi uma

welcome to ff just wanting to send you a big ^cuddleup^ and i will be praying all goes well for you wishing you all the best 
love always lilly xx


----------



## Suzie (Jan 22, 2004)

hi

welcome to ff
sorry to hear of the things you have had to go through
You will find so many truly inspirational people hear on ff
There is always usually someone in chat , it would be great to chat to you

take care
suzie aka olive


----------



## country girl (Jun 18, 2004)

Dear Uma,
Dont worry I'm sure it will work for you on your next go. I will pray for you too. Try , try to not get too stressed if you can, lots of positive thinking.

I know it is completely different but when we first found out DH had a very low sperm count one of the things we talked about was if ICSI didnt work with DH sperm would we use donor sperm. DH was quite unpeturbed about the idea and said if he had met me and I already had a baby or child he would love the child because he loves me so much. He loves his relatives children very much and we both felt that the love and enjoyment of bringing a child up would be the same regardless of its biology.

I think egg donation is becoming more common now with the shared egg collection so you would be bound to find someone of asian background if it came to that.

Although it may not be what you would have planned and dreamed about it would still be fabulous to have a little baby of your own even if its genes were different I bet you wouldnt even think about it when you felt its first kick.

Wishing you lots and lots of baby dust and hoping that you will recover from your traumatic past.

Love CG.


----------



## Fee (May 8, 2003)

Uma

You have been through so much. Can I just say that I think it is great that your cancer was borderline and that you have responded to the treatment so well. You were so lucky to have caught this so early, and this could be cos the tests showed up the cancer before you had any symptoms. So brill news there.
I'm sorry that your embies didn't make it, and that you have only 2 left. I know how this is, as I've only one! I think before you use them you should ask for NK testing to make sure you have every chance of your remaining embies "sticking". This test will make sure your body is not attacking your embies as foreign bodies and trying to rid you of them. Several girls have had this done, and are pg after years of failed IVFs. IM SueL about this. Laine, who has posted to you, has also had these tests. 
Really hope things work for you.
Fee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## LizB (Jun 14, 2004)

Hi Uma,

I just wanted to send you a big hug. You have obviously had a very tough time & while I can't offer any great advice I just wanted to let you know that my thoughts are with you. I really hope your next treatment works.

LizB


----------



## Uma (Jun 18, 2004)

Hi Girls

Just wanted to say thanks so much for all your kind words & positive thoughts.

In particular, thanks to CG & Fee for your advice. I will definitely ask about the NK test - not heard of this before....

I feel much better now as I know I just have to stay positive like you all & good things will come....

Wishing you all lots of luck with your treatments too.

Luv

Uma x


----------

