# Adoption Survival Kit - Opinions needed



## Emnige (Apr 11, 2011)

Hello,

I'm not sure if this the right place to post this, apologies to the mods if this needs to be moved.

I have a blog and I have previously blogged about adoption products, such as books and iphone apps. I have been asked to blog about an adoption survival kit and rather than give my views and opinions on the product, I thought it would be better to hear what those going through the adoption process think of the product.

The link is here:

http://www.momatlast.com/the-adoption-survival-kit/

and here for a bit more info:

http://www.momatlast.com/store/products/theadoptionkit/

If you wouldn't mind sharing your thoughts with me (for publication on my blog), please could you reply to let me know what you think of the product. Good and bad - improvements etc even if you could let me know what you would include in an adoption survival kit if you could make one yourself.

I would really appreciate your input.

Thank you 

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that FertilityFriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## funnychic (Feb 2, 2012)

Hi

I'm just going to be honest which you did say we could, so I really don't think it is useful, interesting or anything I would purchase.  Really don't want to offend but those of us adopting will have already purchased lots of teddies, photo frames etc, just because it says adoption on them really doesn't make is special or unique. 

If I were buying something adoption specific that is exactly what I would expect, special and unique. 

Although negative I hope it helps.


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## Emnige (Apr 11, 2011)

Thanks funky chic, I appreciate your honesty. As someone who hasn't been down the adoption route, I need opinions from those who have and are so I appreciate your opinion.


what does anyone else think of the kit?


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## Guest (Jan 26, 2013)

Hi

To be honest I feel the same as funny chic.  I don't know how it is a survival adoption kit, to me one of those would be a 24 hour call ranting service, together with helpful books on adoption free of charge!!

I will buy my own teddy for my LO, like any mummy,  we go through so much being told about about adoption we know this....we don't want photo frames etc reminding us, just need to be a normal family with normal photo frames!!

Sorry to sound harsh and negative too, plus looked at your app and had to pay if I wanted to get what benefit? I refuse to pay for an app that "supposedly" would help me through the adoption process and find it an insult, adoptive children and parents should never be a money making process for anyone.


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Very Americanised!!

I personally don't like it either.  Like others have said, why would we constantly want to place the 'adopted' status on our child for all the world to see.  Yes that is their identity and yes we and hopefully our LOs will be proud of it, but it is in terms of integrating them into our family and community I don't think we need to all be sporting t-shirts and carrying the I heart adoption bags!  A big emphasis on adoption is helping a child to settle and not feel different.  I don't think these products would help!!

Also, adoption, like any fertility treatments, is timely, challenging, emotional, all consuming really.  There are training days, SW visits (many!), homework, checks and changes that need to be done to your home, pets, your friends, family and community are analysed, there are CRBs, medical checks, financial checks, and panels where we must prove our worth.  And that is before we get to meet our babies.  So to insinuate that squeezing a heart shaped stress ball during the tougher times makes it all alright is pretty insulting!!

I hope that the feedback is useful for you blog... yikes, looks like it may be pretty negative i'm afraid


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## Guest (Jan 26, 2013)

Well said all, especially -x-Lolly-x-

Adopted children and adoptive parents don't need to be advertised, its a hard job for us all, not a commodity.


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## Emnige (Apr 11, 2011)

Thank you for all your feedback. I just want to point out that this isn't my idea or product! I was asked to review it on blog and as someone who hasn't experienced adoption I thought it best to get feedback from those who have. My blog us honest therefore your opinions will be put forward. Thank you everyone who has helped


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## VEC (May 29, 2007)

Emnige, your blog will make interesting reading  

I've not been through adoption either, but if someone had given me the equivalent pack for those going through IVF, I'd have nutted them!

X


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Dont worry, we know it isnt your product! It is great this woman loves adoption so much but I really dont think this product would do at all well on the UK market. Thanks for considering our views! 

Lolly x x x


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## VEC (May 29, 2007)

Just on the point of whether it's good for the UK market or not - IMO fertility issues are a universally miserable experience, and I'd find it surprising if an American market would respond any more positively to the idea that a would-be parent might be comforted by a teddy, photo frame or packet of tissues when what they want is a child.  I think the whole thing is crass and at worst cynical at best utterly ignorant.

X


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## -x-Lolly-x- (Feb 3, 2012)

Agreed VEC!  I just didn't really want to comment too much on what American's would like or wouldn't when I am of course not one, have never been there, and don't know a massive amount about their process    But likely is to be a no no there too, but can only speak from the perspective of being in the UK system.  It would be interesting to know of American perceptions though...


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## Flash123 (Jan 29, 2006)

I agree with you all completely - especially the idea of 'nutting' something vec  . I may be speaking out of line and it is only my opinion (and em we totally understand this isnt yours and i think uve done exactly the right thing seeking the opinion of those involved in the process) but having spoken to other adopters about adoption in general (not this product specifically!!!) and what they have gone through to get to that stage I am amazed that someone who has been through the process can honestly endorse and recommended such products. As you said earlier if only only it was that easy!!!! All those nights I cried myself to sleep - why didn't I think of getting myself a lovely, little teddy. He would of made everything ok!!!!!

Vec, you can get these for ivf  again I think they must have been created by someone who has not seen or witnessed the dark side of infertility. The month after month, cycle after cycle and eventual year after year of negatives, heartbreak and tears. 

My word I never realised I could sound so bitter. Getting worked up now - perhaps I should buy one those survival kits and use the stress ball.


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

Flash123 said:


> All those nights I cried myself to sleep - why didn't I think of getting myself a lovely, little teddy. He would of made everything ok!!!!!


lol flash that made me snort out loud 

i saw this thread posted the other day and was so shocked i couldnt even respond..i didnt have time to think of a reply so mused on it till i came back..by now others have already said what i think pretty much but I just wanted to add in my agreement that i think its a truly horrible product (the price  if nothing else..talk about cashing in on it  
most of it is useless and a total waste of money and, again, like others have said, it belittles the whole subject. 
To 'survive' the adoption process you do not need pointless objects, you need to be able to look inside and be honest with yourselves and to open your heart and mind fully to the process. Its a sad sign of the times that people think you have to 'buy' and not 'be' to cope with the challenges life throws at us

kj x


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## MummyAuntieKatie (Oct 18, 2012)

Oh dear... oh dear...   Tacky, poorly researched, inappropriate, crass, need I say more?  I can't imagine anyone I know benefitting from such tat. It prays on emotional and insecure women at a very vulnerable time in their lives and makes money from them, although I can't see many falling for it.


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## Emnige (Apr 11, 2011)

Thank you for all your comments,I really appreciate it. i know it's aimed at the American market but surely the views would be the same x


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## Guest (Jan 29, 2013)

Sorry emnige but i am not keen either xxxxxxx


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## Ourturn (Oct 8, 2008)

I have to agree with everyone else on here. There's a reason no one else is selling this inappropriate tat in the uk! Being adopted will be part of my future child's history but is not something which will define him/her or me for that matter! 


An adoption survival kit needs a solid relationship, tenacity, support and copious amount of wine and or cake!


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## Ruthiebabe (Dec 15, 2003)

You'll have to post the link to your blog on this....will make interesting reading!?


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