# First sw visit tuesday and panicking!!



## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Just having a slight panic now about tuesday!!  

I had abnormal cells show up on a smear test when i was 19 ( i am now 30) - had to have them lasered off and that was that!

All smear tests since have been 100% ok  

Do i need to mention this when she asks me about health issues?  

xxx


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## Camly (Dec 12, 2006)

hiya

yes!!! i had the same issues, more or less just before our hs. i said that i was in good health - which i am - but then it suddenly came into my head about my abnormal cells etc.  i had to get an early medical and obviously everything was fine. the early med was prob quite a good thing as it got it out the way and then it was 1 less thing to worry about.  

best of luck for tues, im sure it will all be fine.  x x x x  x


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## mmmbop (Jun 30, 2003)

Hi kitty, think it is best to tell everything so no hiccups further down, I don't think there is much that they won't have dealt with heard in their line of work,if you see what I mean.

biggest hugs,xxxx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

best of luck KK  

i'd mention the treatment you had, but can't see it being an issue


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## herbaltea (Apr 9, 2003)

Hiya KK

Please don't worry about tuesday - you've done the homework and ALL will be fine!

I would mention the smear test but wouldn't worry unduly about it!

GOOD LUCK for tuesday


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Thank you all  

Was just having a pre panic but ok again today   - apart from reading a really sad story re adoption of a 2 month old who has since turned into a drug dealer who is addicted to heroin, got expelled from all nurseries and 3 schools and has now got a criminal record!!  

They put it down to the mother hating being pregnant and what was growing inside her!! It just terrifies me!! They adopted him at 2 months old, gave him all the love, time and attention he needed and thats what happened! I know that most adopted children will have some sort of issue but it still terrifies me when i read things like that!! 

Lots of questions for tomorrow xxx


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

kittykat1234 said:


> They adopted him at 2 months old, gave him all the love, time and attention he needed and thats what happened! I know that most adopted children will have some sort of issue but it still terrifies me when i read things like that!!


that can just as easily happen with a birth child 

i know of children who've had perfect upbringings and still gone off the rails. and of families where two children are everyone's model child (go on to be doctors, lawyers) and a third is a nightmare

there's not always a reason why a child does this, all you can do as a parent is try your best :hug:


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

Just wanted to wish you good luck for tomorrow!! Hope it goes well!

Love Alli x

PS I think everyone has panics like that when you hear stories like that, like Katie says can happen to normal people too, would help if the media was more positive about the stories they publish!


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

Kittykat are you with LA or VA ?


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## LB (Sep 24, 2003)

hi

just wanted to say good luck for tomorrow.
I had abnormal test five years ago and adopted my son three years ago and i metioned it and they were fine about it, i had clear tests since then, and they didn't see a problem XX

LB


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## katie c (Jun 15, 2009)

alli said:


> PS I think everyone has panics like that when you hear stories like that, *like Katie says can happen to normal people too*, would help if the media was more positive about the stories they publish!


so we're abnormal then? 

speak for yourself!


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

Sorry!   I meant normal birth families   Although sometimes I think I'm not quite normal!


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## Camly (Dec 12, 2006)

well, kitty - how did it go?     x x  x


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Hi all  

Thank you all for your lovely lovely messages   really have made me smile!!

Well i'll cut to the chase  - went REALLY well!!!  

The sw i had was lovely, but i knew that anyway as had her for the info meeting i went on. She came at 10 and left at 1.30. We covered everything you can think of and she said she is definately putting me forward and she can see no problem as to why her superior would say no       

For anyone wanting to know what was asked i have listed below - 

- Asked all about my up bringing, schooling - did i enjoy it, was i bullied,did i have friends at school, what are my views on private education against state!! 
- She asked about my support network, who would i call in the middle of the night if i was struggling, who would i get to babysit and what are my child care thoughts! 
- She asked about the 2 dogs i have although she really didn't seem bothered about them at all,
- About my child care experience, but we had spoken about that before as i have had quite a lot and she said she can tell i have from what i have said, that made me feel at ease  . She wanted to know all about the type of babysitting i have done and who for (age) and how long for and how did i deal with tantrums and screaming babies in the night.
- She asked me about attachment, what issues i feel i can deal with and all about the course i went on with auk a couple of weeks ago.
- All about past relationships, why they broke down and how long we all lived together and how i feel about introducing a new partner into the little ones life! I knew i would get asked all about that and was more than prepared - she also liked my answer to that one  
Any medical issues, i told her about the abnormal smear when i was 19 and she said thank you for mentioning it but that will be fine and i needn't have done. Glad i did though!
- Childrens age,sex and race
- What my neighbourhood had to offer and if it was multi cultural and all the attractions it had! This was a good one for me as i am currently working on my booklet to promore the area, ready for home study so all this was fresh in my mind - i nearly forgot to mention all the educational stuff the area has to offer as i was sooooo off on one about the soft play centres and severn valley rail way and zoo etc etc and then i remembered just in time about the local sunday school and art and craft classes and groups near bye, which also went down well with her ( i would strongly advise you look into what educational stuff there is in your area as i could see how impressed with this she was and the fact i had looked into it)    She asked a great deal about schools and whats in the area too.
- We covered a bit about the reasons children are put into care and what the highest reason is in b'ham, which we had already covered in the info meeting so that was quick. She was also impressed with all the books i have been reading and wanted to see them! 
- She then had a thorough look around and wanted all doors, cupboards and anything else opening  
- I had also had the carbon monoxide alarms fitted which also went down well!! They are essential and i knew that from the auk site.
Its was really positive and considering i had been up from 5am casue i was getting in a pickle about it, i actually feel on top of the world!!
To anyone who hasn't had this done yet - NO NEED AT ALL TO WORRY!! It's purely a screening visit and to see if you are raving nut cases or not   - no offence to anyone who has had any mental health illness's by the way!! 
Ohh and she also asked all about my hobbies and interests and would i take little one with me to any of them. 

Thank you again all and any help i can be to anyone who is at this stage then ask away cause it is down to the girls and boys on here as to why i did so well  - so a HUGE thank you to you all     .

Lady pink - i am with LA - Birmingham  

Next stage is prep training, there are 3 courses running between now and september, all which are full, so i am going to be put forward on to the sept one which is great for me as i can do more reading etc etc and she said that they do have people dropping out so i will be asked to go on one if that happens, and the best is, it's evenings and a saturday, so no time needed off work  .

I met a wonderful couple last night at the support meeting, they have been fostering for 10 yrs and have just adopted a 2 yr old kenyan boy who they have since birth! I have their mobile and land line numbers and they live 5 mins away frm me and they want me to put them on my support network     .

Hope you are all ok and sorry this was long, i am on cloud 9 at the moment - as you can probably tell


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## Boggy (Dec 13, 2006)

Well Done KittyKat, sounds like you did really well and I'm glad you are feeling so happy with it all.

If I was a social worker, I'd be impressed with the amount of prep you'd done too!  

bx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Thank you boggy - a lot of what they will see from me during hs will be thanks to you!! Thought it would have been a bit too premature today to start showing her the eco map ( although i really wanted too  ) 

Hope all is well with you and thank you again for your message!

xxx


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## Camly (Dec 12, 2006)

glad all went well     x x x


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

excellent it all sounds promising,


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

Kittykat - well done! You may be starting in september which should be around the same time as me!   I can't believe she opened your doors and cupboards!     Hope September comes round quick for us!  

Alli xx


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## herbaltea (Apr 9, 2003)

Hiya KK  

Wow, that visit sounds brilliant!!!!!  Well done you, you must be over the moon!

I can't believe they looked in cupboards............eek........they better not do that to me haha!

Well done  
x


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## Tarango (Nov 3, 2006)

Hi KK

glad your visit went well...... September will be here before you know it- or you could get a call to go on an earlier one.... you never know!!

xx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Thanks everyone 

I am fine with sept to be honest as there is no rush for me and just gives me time to go on more courses and get though my books etc.

I have been having a few wobbles these last few days and i spoke with the sw today about it all and she really reassured me and she is actually using me as her case study for a diploma course she is doing to further her career!! She said my case would be ideal  - hope thats a good thing anyway 

I am very pleased with this morning and like you all say, sept will be here soon enough. Just gonna enjoy the summer and go on hol and chill before training and hs starts 

Alli, which LA/VA are you through? That will be good if we start together as we can see how each other are getting on!



xxx


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

Kittykat - my LA is in Swindon, we're supposed to get allocated a SW in June and then she said we would start a couple months later, I'm thinking with summer hols in the way it will be September! The good thing though is the HS and prep groups are done at the same time but they said probably 6 months in total. I'm willing this year to go quickly! 

Don't worry about the wobbles, I have them all the time too! I think it's natural being such a big step..... after having gone through a lot of disappointment with tx I still don't believe I will be a mummy! 

Interesting that they will use your case as a study, she must have thought you were inspirational!  

A xx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Ohhh thats good then that the hs and training is done together! Yes i can imagine you are counting down the seconds, it will fly bye though and i am going to fill the time with lots more reading, courses through auk and my LA as the sw told me about some that are coming up that i am interested in and also going to start enquiring about schools  that i would like to send little one too and how much training (if any), the teachers have done on adoption as that will sway me to one of the chosen  schools. 

Well i kind of thought maybe it was a positive thing that she asked me if she could do her case study on me, hope it is anyway.

I can imagine how hard it is to beleive that your dream will come true but i am sure it will and you have come this far so just keep positive and stick with it and just try and fill the time with things that will help your hs. My sw seemed quite keen on church groups and sunday schools etc which i have thought about before anyway so i am also going to look into that  . I love doing all this sort of thing, and anything i can do to promote myself and the area i am in i will do  

Chin up and stay in touch xx


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

I'm not much of a church goer really, but I bet that will help. I help out in a Rainbows group every week, have done for the last year. Its brownies but younger - ages 5-7. It's actually a lot of fun and the girls are lovely!  

Thinking of maybe volunteering in a nursery too as I would ideally like a younger child although have looked after nieces and nephews and friend's kids, some overnight which the SW said was good.

Will have a look at AUK courses like you too, just joined them and have quite a bit of stuff to read! I have already read quite a few books but mostly last year so need to start again.

What age child are you interested in?

xx


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## kittykat1234 (Jan 15, 2010)

Well i'm not either to be honest but do think it would be nice for little one to maybe start the sunday morning sessions some places do as it does seem very beneifical for them, gonna have a look anyway.

That sounds good about rainbows, i would like to start that too as have looked before but think i have enough on my plate at the moment  , something for the future though maybe  

Ideally i would like younger too, as young as poss which is about 9 months if you are lucky, although the sw said yday that they have a lot of younger children in the system at the moment and they are tending to be younger and younger that are coming into care, but up to 3 is my age range.

I am in the middle of reading 'New families, old scripts as i was really struggling with ' A childs journey through placement'. Really do want and need to read on attachment as i only really know the basics, and this book is more easy going, still doing a chapter a night though  


If you book on any of the courses let me know  

xx


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