# Newbie ttc 1 1/2yr referal turned down as too early for tx



## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi everyone!

My DH and I been ttc for abt 1 1/2 yr now and our blood tests and SA tests came back fine. We got referred to a fertility clinic due my age(im 35 DH is 36) but they said we have to try for at least 2 yrs before they will see us. I dont understand why as guidelines said we sld seek help after 6 months at age of 35. They also said it would be unfair on couples who have been trying for longer. It has been very stressful i am not very good at writing my feelings on paper. If fertility decreases so fast after 35 why they wont help now? Does anyone know if i can do anything to get accepted now by the clinic? My GP did warn us that the clinic might turn us down. We are also thinking of maybe speeding up our chances and going abroad for private IVF should we wait a little longer and see if NHS will help us? I forgat to mention that we were having unprotected sex before ttc so technically its been longer sld i mention it to the GP? Our GP does not seem to be particularly good at this wondering if i sld seek help from another? Neither of us have previous children and been together for 10yrs. 

Would love to hear from someone in similar sit thank you.

Mady


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## karenanna (Dec 27, 2008)

Hi Mady

Just a couple of thoughts

- Does your local area have a written policy? if so there is probably a mechanism for complaining it they aren't following it. Sometimes putting something in writing sparks an action.

If you are thinking of going abroad, we have an International section that you may wish to look at and post on to seek advice - CLICK HERE

I have had friends who have had private treatment in parallel with waiting for NHS IVF and some who have had private treatment then an NHS round. I think some of it can depend on your local area policies.

KA xxx


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## karenanna (Dec 27, 2008)

We also have a board for unexplained infertility - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=111.0

and a starting out board with guides and different sections for investigations etc... - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?action=collapse;c=26;sa=collapse;cf983bf5=756a7c4007ba2c0d4bcafc01b6cdf04b#c26

KA xxx


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## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi KA,

Thank you for your advice really appreciate it. I looked at some of the links they were very useful. 

The clinic sent us a copy of their policy its 2 yrs of ttc before treatment can start.
Not sure what else to do feels like we hit a brick wall. Should i go back to the GP? Can the GP send me for a check of fallopian tubes? Also can GP prescribe Clomid?  I have been charting my cycles for abt 8 months and it looks like i could have a short luteal phase of 8-9 days only. Is there a link where people on here talk abt this? Thx a lot guys im so happy that i found this. All my friends have children im the last one and everyone ask us when we're gonna have babies and its been so long that i dont know what to say to them anymore. 

Cheers Mady


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

You could go back to your GP and say you have been trying 2 years - if you haven't been using contraception then there isn't any way they can argue you aren't trying, especially when most GPs answer to people not getting pregnant is "have more sex"   

There is a section for natural TTC http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=530.0 And there are quite a few separate threads about leutal phase and progesterone. There is also a complimentary section for people using natural and homeopathic stuff etc (sorry, my IT skills are limited to one link per post!)

Some GPs will prescribe clomid, but a lot won't - sorry, I don't know the reasons for this. However, it's better to wait until you know what the cause is before trying it. E.g. If the problem is tubes or sperm then clomid won't help.

Your GP is unlikely to send you for a tube test, but they can order basic bloods and ultrasound, but they normally need a gynie reason to do this, e.g. Irregular periods, painful periods, heavy periods etc. Even then it can take a while before they actually investigate the cause.

Sorry - I sound quite pessimistic but I don't mean to be! In my experience it really drags and seems to take forever to get a referral, but you know once you do loads happens really quickly. I can't believe that this time last year I was still hadn't had my first appointment at the fertility clinic, and now Im on my third cycle!

I knows it might not be what you want to hear because it's so hard, and honestly I do understand how horrible the waiting is, but eating healthy, keeping active, taking folic acid, and sex are the best things to do to wait out the next few months if your GP won't listen to the "actually, I meant to say it's been 2 and a half years ttc..." However, you can also to and see another GP at your practice.

Good luck, it's a horrible place to be when you feel like nothing is happening. Have a look at the Coping with Infertility thread, there is loads of support on here honey, you aren't alone xxxx


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## monty moo (May 1, 2013)

Mady35
Hi I just wanted to say I agree go back to your gp see a different ine if need be and say when you sat down to really thonk about it its been 2 yrs plus I was in the same boat as you though my gp was the opposite attitude she referred us saying there was such a long waiting time it made sense to b reffered right away. I was 35 unexplained and had been trying around 18mths too. Im so glad she did Im now pregnant from 2nd ivf cycle and Im now 38 so you can see how crucial your referral can be. We also were lucky to only have to wait around 9mths to get into NHS tries and had decided to pay in May when we were told our first free go would b July 2013 so we waited it out. That cycle didnt work, we are unexplained by the way too am happy to answer any questions if I can b of any help I know how overwhelming it all is feel free to pm me!
Anyway 2nd go was Jan and here I am 26wks pregnant but I truly feel its a long haul and the quicker you move forward and get info the better. Im also aware different parts of the uk have different wait times x Wish you lots of luck 
Montymoo


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## kimmibobs (Jun 26, 2014)

Hi Mady,

We had EXACTLY the same situation. We moved to a new area only to discover the new area wouldn't investigate until we'd been trying for 2 years, whereas the old one was just one year. One GP was adamant she wouldn't refer us but we decided to have one last try and thankfully this GP was brilliant and understood why we were so upset. It's worth trying again, or maybe go private if they refuse to budge. It's also worth looking into how many rounds of IVF your local area will fund - ours will only fund one go whereas many will fund 3 now. I found this site really helpful and have written to the CCG and my MP http://www.infertilitynetworkuk.com/niac_2. Hopefully things will change!

I know what you mean about feeling like you're the only one without children - all our friends have almost completed their families now and most people have stopped asking us. We think they assume we don't want them! If anyone asks we just say we hope to have children soon then change the subject. Most people are sensitive enough not to push it.

Good luck!

Kim xx

/links


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## karenanna (Dec 27, 2008)

Here's a new area where you can chat whilst awaiting results of investigations and tests 
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=324110.0

KA xxx


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## 3rdtime (Jun 30, 2014)

Can you not ask to be referred to a gyne? 

Gyne can give you clomid & give you further tests, as IVF is usually a last resort they fall to on NHS unless there is a specific problem that nothing else will help.

Xx


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## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi ladies,

Thank you so much for your advices it makes the wait a little easier when you talk to someone in the same sit. It sounds like i should see a dif GP i didnt know you can do that tbh i guess i need a GP that will really care and listen to our problem my current one has a 'dont care dont know attitude which doesnt help unfort.

Thk you for the link u sent me Cloudy i shall look at it shortly. I work 12hr shifts which is why i get on here every few days when im off. My periods are heavy and v long so ill def mention this to the gp they havent really asked me many questions regards period except if its regular and if i have one every month. It does make me wonder if my GP knows much abt fertility no disrespect but she looks quite young maybe recently qualified. One of my friends got referred and seen by fertilitist within 2 wks from referral and she goes to same GP practice dif doctor. Perhaps i sld go see that one) fingers crossed. Good luck and lots of baby dust with your third cycle Cloudy pls keep me posted i wld love to hear from you.xx


Hi Montymoo 
Thks for your replay and first of all big congratulations on your pregnancy you must be so happy now. It feels like it drags a lot certainly but hope we'll get there one day staying positive) Just wish i could speed things up a bit. I will go and see a dif GP i havent done it yet because i was embarrased to ask for a dif one. Im away next wk but i shall try and book tom cos appoint can take ages to book. I wish my GP had your GPs attitude) thx again for your advice. Good luck with your pregnancy.xx

Hi Kimmibobs

Im so glad to hear from someone in the same boat as us. I dont feel so alone anymore since i found this website. In our area they give u 2 ivf after 2 yrs on ttc with a diagnosis or 3 yrs of ttc with an unexplained cause. I almost want them to find something wrong so i dont have to wait this long) i feel that my probl is to do with low progesterone or short luteal phase defect of abt 8 days. But i only had bloods so far so no other tests yet. Your replays made me stronger and ill def not give up and try and seek help from a dif GP. How do you write to your local CCG? Where are they usually based? Ill look up this link in a bit thx for sending it to me.Let me know how your investigations go Kimmibobs. Good luck with everything.xx


Thk u for that link KA that will be my bedtime reading for tonight)xx

Hi 3rd time,
Thx for your advice ill mention it to the GP and see where we go from here. Ill keep you posted abt that. With all your advice im gonna go armed with lots of questions next time for sure  xx

Thx again everyone and good luck with your journey. Ill keep you posted after ive been to see another GP. Baby dust to all of you.xx


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## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi everyone!

Does anyone know if there's a link for the over 35 ttc?
Also anyone been referred to fertility clinic in Crawley Furnace Green?
This is part of West Sussex Fertility Service. Well i have been referred there but they said to come bk after 2yrs of ttc. Was wondering if anyone got seen quicker and what was the reason. One of my friends got seen within 2 wks! 

Thx a lot and good luck with ur journeys.xx

Thx a lot.


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## Flutter74 (Sep 27, 2013)

Hi. have a look on the area thread as your clinic maybe on there as a thread. 

i got seen v quickly at the clinic i used but was private not nhs 

good luck 

f xxx


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## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi Flutter74!

Thx i will try and have a look there.
Clinic name is LES not sure what it stands for. And its NHS we said we'll have to try it first but we might go private also.
Not very good at using the site yet. 
Just saw ur BFP huge congratulations! Hope ill get there one day thou it feels impossible atm. 

Thx again.x


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## 3rdtime (Jun 30, 2014)

Mady- have you been to see a gyne? If not ask to be referred to one. If the gyne can spot a problem you wont have to wait 2 years. Also they can try you on things like clomid, IUI, do scans, more in depth bloods, multiple semen analysis tests.

Good luck xx


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## karenanna (Dec 27, 2008)

Mady35 said:


> Hi everyone!
> 
> Does anyone know if there's a link for the over 35 ttc?
> Also anyone been referred to fertility clinic in Crawley Furnace Green?
> ...


Hi Mady

We don't have an over 35 section, just an over 40.

I had a look for old posts in the Crawley area and there aren't any since around 2010. I noticed that you had posted there but hadn't had much response.

I think the best place for you to "meet others' and chat at the moment is probably this thread here - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=324110.0

KA xxx


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## Kitten36 (Jul 4, 2014)

Hi KA,

Thk u for the thread its very useful and most imp more recent. I shl join in next few days as im working this wkend. 

Hi 3rdtime

I will ask my GP if she can refer me to a Gynae i hope they can start doing some tests anything as i feel im going nowhere atm. Did u get referred to a gynae and got anything done? Id be happy even if they prescribe Clomid to start with) As u can see i sound a bit desperate. Ive been away for a while so im now ready to get my GP to sort something out. The Clinic that i got referred to said in a letter they might see us earlier than 2yrs but didnt specify when Ill keep u posted thx again for ur support it makes all the difference to know im not alone.

Mady xx


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## 3rdtime (Jun 30, 2014)

Mady- yes I seen a gyne had all sorts of tests, was given clomid, my partner had SA's done & a scan & was refered to a urologist, who then refered us for ICSI.

Get on to your GP  xx


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