# Newbie from Suffolk



## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

The Husband and I have been trying for about two and a half years but have had no luck so far! We haven't really told anyone either so when we started feeling things were wrong it became harder and harder to tell people that we have been trying. The frustration is getting to us so I thought it might be good to talk to some people who will understand, hopefully that will happen here! Only just joined but already feeling like it's helping   ! 

All I've ever wanted was kids and I work with children, and its getting harder and harder to not get upset when yet another person I know announces that their pregnant! It sounds awful I know but we have been waiting a long time already. It took me a long time to go to my GP because I was terrified that they would tell me something was wrong, but worse than that we haven't found out anything   and now we have been told that we need to wait another year before a fertility specialist will see me. It's hard to stay hopeful but I'm trying!


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## Wraakgodin (Jun 17, 2006)

to FF, mrs kristicle!!! Have a good look round the site, post in whatever section you want and make yourself at home. There are so many sections here with a huge amount of information, so whatever you are going through there will be someone here to help you.

Glad to hear that we have helped already! We have a brand new section "Coping With Infertility" - CLICK HERE which may help you with coping with other peoples announcements. I think most of us on here have struggled with that.

The Suffolk ladies may be able to help you with where you go from here. Here is a link to our East Anglia section - CLICK HERE. I am not based in the UK so I am not 100% sure of the system over there.

The What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~   CLICK HERE will give you some help navigating the site.

Our live chat room has a new member chat at 8pm on Wednesday. Here is our Chat Zone section which will give you info on other chats: CLICK HERE

Please feel free to ask more questions here, or on any other part of the site, there will be wonderful helpful people there to give you lots of support, information and cyber hugs if you need it. We go through all the highs and lows together.

Good luck!       

Sue


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Thanks Sue thats all fab I will be sure to have a good root around all the amazing information on here, but it will be nice just to have some sympathetic ears to listen to what we are going through at the moment. It's hard not being able to share all this with everyone but i feel it would be even worse if we did, we struggle with our own expectations, let alone everyone elses!!!


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

Hi Im also from Suffolk  
Would be great to chat about things, why are they waiting another year?
xxxx


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Hi Jo, whereabouts in Suffolk are you? 

I've been told that I can't have referral until I'm 23 but no-one has really explained why exactly that is which is quite frustrating, I'm trying to find ways around it but so far it looks like my only option is to go private! 

Are you nervous about your appointment at Bourn hall or just eager? 
Xxxxxx


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

im from felixstowe
How about u?

oh that age thing is awful, going private is so expensive thats the only prob.

im kinda excited and nervous all at the same time tbh lol

xxxxxx


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## Hevan81 (Jul 20, 2011)

Mrs Kristicle

Hi. All PCTs are different and where I am I had to wait until I was 30 for TX. However I was referred to the Fertilty Clinic at 28, after TTC for a year, where they did all the necessary tests, all under NHS. Once diagnosis for me and DH were established the clinic made an application to the exemptions committee, which was refused, hence having to wait. How long is it until you are 23? It may be worth speaking to GP again and seeing if the referral can be made in order for the first steps to be made. Also, your GP should be doing basic blood and semen tests for you and DH. 

As for feeling the way you do about PG announcements, it is completely normal and vey hard to deal with at times. Just try to remind yourself that one day soon, your dream will come true


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Hi i too am from Suffolk and tbh havent even bothered with nhs as it is so poor in this area but yes private is expensive depending on where you go. Plus we are not eligible for nhs tx due to my bmi needing to be lower, the guidelines seem to be mega strict. We did go and have a consultation at bourne hall colchester but for us it didnt feel right and we werent happy with their success rates but it does work for others. 
Can i ask what your fertility problems are? Maybe us ladies need to have a suffolk coffee morning or suffolk meet!! Lol how strange! Where in Suffolk is everyone else?


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Jo- I'm in Ipswich! And your right I've heard that just one cycle of Clomid is over £500! When you go private! I've heard a lot of good things about this Bourn hall place so I'm sure it will go well and Ill have my fingers crossed that everything goes to plan! 

Hevan81- its only a year until I'm 23 and my GP has done all the preliminary bloods and stuff but because my cycles are so irregular they were all inconclusive! The DH has top swimmers though so at least we don't have that to worry about! We are trying to stay positive but its difficult because people keep asking when we are going to start a family and I can't bring myself to tell them all how long we've been trying!!

Sarah - Hi! Yeah the guidelines are too strict and some don't even make sense really! And that's just the problem we have, we don't actuallu know what the problem is all I have to go on is that my cycles are too irregular ( ithis year I went from the end of July to the start of November without a period!) But this could be a number of things and from what I've hear and researched it could be as simple as a course of Clomid but having to wait another whole year to even find out is driving us crazy! How are you getting on with your tx? 
I think a Suffolk meet would be a lovely idea! 
Xkx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Mrs kristicle- we have had a failed tx and are hoping to try again this year money depending. Could you go private for clomid tx? If it would only be £500 id go for it IVF with ICSI cost us £14,000 so £500 is a doddle lol. Im in Lowestoft so Ipswich would be an ok meeting place for me not really sure whats half way between lowestoft/felixstowe and ipswich !!! The nhs rules suck. It would take me n year to lose the weight then id have to be on waiting list for a year because im not considered urgent being in my 20's and then getting to the actual tx would be another 6 months at least and i really cant wait that long! A natural concepetion would be a miracle but i keep holding out hope each month. Ive bought a clearblue fertility monitor, what an amazing piece of kit, cost £75 but worth every penny. Tells you exactly how your LH is increasing slowly and when you have a surge. Its all digitalised and stores and remembers your cycle, amazing. Im taking wellwoman conception supplements and have got dh on wellman conception so we are rattling lol

Sarah x


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Sarah, how did you go abouth getting your private health care and where did you go?  
I am on the same vitamins too but the hubby is fit as a fiddle so its only me rattling! I've got the prediction sticks but my cycles can be so long that its still a little hard to tell, we just try to be regular  I've looked at those digital ones and I think I should probably get one, they seem much easier to figure outm
I totally agree that the nhs seems to suck atm how can they consider any fertility matter as not urgent? They are always saying the later you leave it the harder it is, it makes no sense!  
And I'd be happy to meet in ippy, would be good to get together for chatting and cake of course!! X


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Yes a chat and cake sounds lovely but you have the cake and i will have the rabbit food lol. We did a lot of research before we had tx and tbh we wanted to go with the best and with the clinic that had the best success rates. We had an independent urologist for my dh problems and we went to the ARGC in London for our tx. It is hassle but we commuted every day as it was cheaper than staying in london. I would recommend them but it is incredibly intense and i would say for you clomid is your first step before ivf may need to be considered. Perhaps bourne hall is an option for you? It is an entirely personal choice on clinics. We didnt rate bourne hall for ICSI tx as they had a very nhs approach and as we were paying for it i wanted to steer clear of these approaches. Go on the HFEA website and look at clinics in the surrounding area. Of course the best clinics are in London which are amazing like CRGH, the lister, Barts to name but a few. Have you considered having acupuncture? It is amazing and something you will see widely recommended throughout this forum. I would still encourage your partner to take something like wellman conception, nkthing wrong with staying healthy and his sperm getting all the right nutrients. 

Sarah x


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Thanks for the sdvice Sarah, I think we are going to go along to an open day at Bourn Hall and get an idea of the treatment and stuff, just gather as much info as possible and then maybe look into other clinics because I think commuting would be difficult for us just because of work and stuff! I've also heard loads about acupuncture and its another thing I'd definitely be open to doing, anything that might help! On reading something on here I've also just started taking extra B6 in the hope that it helps my hormones a bit!! 
Xkx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Great idea going to an open day at least you will be armed with info. As for commuting it is tiring, i would drive to diss, an hour and then on the train at 6am and then walk to clinic after a tube ride so tiring! But its what we wanted because of the tx being so amazing. It wasnt possible for me to work during tx and with all the hormones tbh i didnt wana think about work as my job is quite intense so i was signed off for 6 weeks for tx and for the two week wait. My GP was amazing. Have you considered changing GP? Someone else might refer you for clomid tx?
Im still feeling plop as we cant afford tx again for a little while and so need to lose weight first. It just feels so unfair. But hey this fertility train aint easy!

Sarah x


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Yeah at the moment ill try anything! And I don't really want to change GP because he's been amazing so far its just the gyno that I need to get around! I don't really have a high pressure job, I'm a childminder at home so it will be tough to get tratment and work at the same time but we couldn't really afford to take the time off! And also if we need to pay out treatment we have to save back all the money we can! 
You have to stay positive and I know that the BMI thing is really pants.mine is pretty good but could be better I'm going to join the gym, the exercise can't hurt and I find it helps with the stress! Xkx


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

Hi Ladies,
Sorry I havent been on here for a while, been super busy.
I would love to have a meet up.  

xxxx


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

What are your schedules like? Then we can pick a day and maybe all meet for a coffee or something?! X


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

I work monday to friday but it would lovely to meet for a coffee one weekend xx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Yep weekend suits me x


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## mrs kristicle (Jan 11, 2012)

Me too! How about the first weekend in feb? Saturday the 4th I think it is? X


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Yes thats ok for me. Can we meet somewhere easy for my satnav to find!!! Obviously its about a 3 hour round trip for me so the nearer to the Lowestoft wide the better for me ( just being selfish!!) is there anywhere convenient in between? A pub or something thats quietish so we can talk fertility, sex and internals lol
Am rubbish with venues so have a think and i will try and rack my brains too


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

4th sounds fab to me. I have no idea whats about or where to go so I will let everyone else choose.
Prehaps we should exchange mob numbers on private message to that if we get lost or need to confirm anything.


xx


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

Hi ladies are we still going to meet?
xxxx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Yep I'm still up for it I will pm u my mobile number. Any ideas where to meet?


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Ive sent private message but still havent heard anything so going to have to give it a miss. Maybe another date can be arranged as im thinking of setting up a suffolk infertility support group and would love your input. 

Sarah xxx


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

Hi sarah, ive not been able to get on the internet for a while prehaps we can sort something for this month? xx

Where has everyone else gone? 

xxx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

I dont know, gone very quiet. Howz things anyway?


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## jo2004uk (Jan 6, 2012)

Still much the same, just waiting for Bourne hall cambridge to contact us for consultation.
Feels like a lifetime!! lol
xx


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## Sarah1712 (Mar 6, 2011)

Have you thought about egg sharing? It would be at bourne hall colchester i think but its private and coz you are sharing your eggs you get treatment free


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## Wraakgodin (Jun 17, 2006)

Hello ladies 

I hope you are all well and finding your way around the site

As this is the Introductions area, we try to discourage chat threads from starting, as there is a high turnover of newbies joining who need our help to search the site for advice and support. Once the mods have left relevant links, we like to encourage you to pop into other areas and make new friends in similar situations to yourselves. It's nice that you all want to keep in touch, so please have a look in areas such as

East Anglia - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=524.0
And a specific thread they have for Suffolk ladies - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=250042.0
Cycle Buddies - http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=68.0

Dont forget that you can send pm's to each other by clicking on their name on the left hand side

Take care and I wish you all luck and babydust  

Sue


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