# Is anyone scared to hold a baby



## SuzanneM (Sep 16, 2009)

I know that I have always been.  When a baby is seen, every woman starts crooning, but I just walk away and get the look of: "you must be cold hearted".

The problem is that I am the opposite, I would dearly love to pick the baby up, but petrified that I would not give him or her back.

I hate baby bumps!  My husband always warns me of the: "fat woman" coming near.  I get this horrible sick feeling and my heart feels like it stops beating.

I feel as though this women are pushing their fortune right into my face, which I know is not true, but I am pretty obsessed with it.

I want to feel normal, but don't.


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## livity k (May 19, 2009)

Just wanted to send you a hug    You and your Dh know what  is really going on and that you are not cold hearted- I really hope you find a way forwards- 

love 

K


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## galaxy girl (Feb 12, 2008)

yes - i can't cope with the baby holding either - i have a new stategy - make DH do it!! doesn't bother him. i also try and time baby visits  with other people - then less pressure to hold. my brother had 2nd baby 2 weeks ago - i made my mum turn up at the same time as us so she could do a lot of the holding and fussing.

I also hate seeing pregnant women and they are always everywhere!


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## bakedbeans (Dec 4, 2009)

hello, i thought it was just me!!!!! and i know what you mean i just never know what to say or where to look. i just go out of my way to avoid anyone who is pregnant and anyone who has a baby.
ive only just come on this site tonight and i am so pleased because it seems that i am not alone.
love maria x


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

I know just how you feel, after I had my miscarriage I avoided holding or going to gatherings where friends babies would be, then my friend plonked his 3 week old nephew in my arms 1 year and 10 days after my own loss and I burst into tears and had to hand him to another friend nearby. I felt so bad as I was there with mascara streaming down my face, and also concerned that I didn't want his mum to see me crying.  I knew he wasn't my baby but I should have had my own baby. My friend said that he knows that I hadn't held a baby and wanted to help me! 
There are some days when it seems that there are pregnant women and babies everywhere.

I empathise with you 

L x


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## jofi (Apr 7, 2006)

I can't deal with newborns at all and I would try to fake all the expected reactions if i could but I'm not that good an actress. I used to feel terribly guilty about being this way but I've learnt to cut myself a bit of slack. Don't expect the majority of your friends to understand, they just can't, as we probably wouldn't have either had things turned out differently for us.
I'm not being very helpful am I ? sorry, I just wanted you to know what you are feeling is very normal reaction.

( galaxy girl  )


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## BigSis (Nov 6, 2005)

I love kids generally, but once I had a very strong sensation of revulsion when my sister-in-law's baby girl was placed in my arms. I could not have wanted to hold her any less. I hate being around pregnant women too - somehow it is the hardest thing of all.

so you're not alone


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