# does anyone just feel theyre never gonna get that BFP?



## karen55 (Jan 19, 2008)

i know im being stupid being this pessimistic in the 2WW but im soooooo scared that im never gonna get my BFP. other ladies have spoken to me about getting immunology tests done but i can barely afford a FET never mind a fresh cycle with extra tests. im just feeling so low. ive had 5 blasts transfered in total (fair enough numbers 2 and 3 were only average) but im still freaked out!

i have 2 5AA hatched blasts onboard and if these dont stick i just dont see that nothing is ever going too  someone please tell me off. this 2WW drives me batty its official!!


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## Cath34 (Oct 14, 2008)

Hi Karen, I had FET on the 22nd Sept, its my 6th cycle!!! My last fresh cycle i went for full immune testing and treatment including going to Greece x2 for LIT. My consultant is in London and I live in Wales. I feel exactly the same you, will it ever happen, I am doubtful now as time keeps passing. I too make good blasts and wish I knew why they never implant. My immunes seem to be under control now with IVIG, but I have spent an absolute fortune!! I feel as if af is definitely coming any day as i am wel used to the same old feeling. I have no other symptoms and so I know it hasn't worked again!! I also feel so low and completely fed up with the whole damn process.


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## Locket (Apr 24, 2007)

Hi Karen 

Firstly I'm sorry you're already finding the 2ww a struggle.  It's a torture that people who don't experience it can never imagine     The financial side is also obviously worrying - I'm assuming you're not getting NHS funding?    It's natural when you've had neg cycles to start thinking about what you'll do next if the current one doesn't work either - however you're not there yet are you?  My advice would be to try and focus on the next 10 days as you may not have to think about another cycle       As you know there is no rhyme or reason why some embryos don't implant and others do.   We had 8 top grade embryos transferred in total and only one of those stuck.   

Take care and I've got everything crossed this is your time


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## karen55 (Jan 19, 2008)

thanks ladies

i know the chances are its just tough luck and i just havent had the right embie put back yet but it is so hard to see through that atm. i really hope i get to read these back next week and feel stupid   

locket thank you so much hunny. im sure you mustve felt the same. i only get funding for one fresh and one FET so this FEt is self funding at £1000, its just so hard as we have no spare cash. im gonna try and do what you said and look at the next 10 days first and think about anything else afterwards xxx

cath awww hunny  i have nothing to moan about when i read your story    how you feeling now?? did they find anything in london when you saw them. ive only just started thinking about these other problems later. i have PCOS and dont ovulate so i just presumed that was my problem but someone suggested the other day that maybe i have double trouble!! typical


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## Louiseb26 (May 13, 2009)

Karen,I'm telling you off...NAUGHTY GIRL
Try and stay positive Hun.Keep thinking    all the way.You are doing so well,this week is nearly done.Got to keep that mind busy or it does some funny things to you...you go mad and all sorts pop into your head.Im going to keep following you around and put a smile on your face 
[fly]                                  [/fly]

Lou xx


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## karen55 (Jan 19, 2008)

louise  your my angel!! the thing that irritates me the most is that i know im totally cuckoo!!!


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## Louiseb26 (May 13, 2009)

Ahhh thanks lovely.we must all be cuckoo then  I did think i was cuckoo till i found FF,reading some of the ladies threads is like there talking about you...we can be nutters together Karen 

Lou xx 

[fly]       [/fly]


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## Lynn E (Aug 7, 2008)

Hi there ladies, it is really hard feeling one is not going go get a BFP especially  when so much has been spent. what I try to do I when working out costs is to divide the treatment costs by 12 (for ever month) so it looks like I am spending very little. There is an article in last months Red magazine that explains the true realities we have to go through, on average we pay £6500 per treatment. But what keeps me and DH going is that one day we will have a little one calling as mum and dad.                Lynn E


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