# Feeling Down



## estella (Nov 1, 2009)

Hi Girls,

I am pregnant (5 wks DIUI) and so delighted with that. I'm feeling quite down as I actually thought ex and I had a bit of a chance, he was aware of DIUI and said he hoped we would be a family but since I got my bfp he has picked fights and broken promises.

I'm sure this isn't the right place to post but I don't know where else to post. He has moved out a while and has mental problems, PTSD and says he is emotionally blocked, but gets different diagnosis from each new psychologist he goes to. This has been going on for YEARS. He is a great dad though.

It's probably hormones, maybe the fact it's xmas, and I know I need to focus on the positives, I have a beautiful dd and another little one on the way. But I feel a bit empty. My sisters are helpful and say they support my decision but I really feel alone. 

Sorry, I normally try to be positive and helpful on the boards, I'm having a bit of a wobble today (

E xx


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## indekiwi (Dec 23, 2008)

Estella, thought I'd post some       for you.  It is always sad when the family you thought you'd have - mum, dad and the kids as a happy and loving unit - doesn't come off in real life.    As you say though, Xmas is not the easiest time of year at the best of times, and with pregnancy hormones racing around your body, another child to look after, an ex with whom you are up and down with, AND the realisation that there is actually going to be a second little person for whom you will likely have sole responsibility with all that entails, it's no surprise that you feel a little low.  If you can, take things one day at a time, give yourself the gift of space from your ex if for whatever reason he is being unreasonable, and enjoy the love and support of your DD and your sisters at what is, after all, an extraordinary time of your life.    

A-Mx


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## estella (Nov 1, 2009)

Thanks Indewiki,

I probably as I say shouldn't have posted here and believe me I do know that I am sooooooo lucky to have a bfp.
Its hormones and I need to snap myself out of it and get on with life.
I'm sure I'll be better tomorrow, your kind words mean a lot though, believe me.

Es xx


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## indekiwi (Dec 23, 2008)

Estella, a number of people on this board have posted about how they've felt regarding special relationships over the year or so since I've been posting.  It would be kind of strange if it didn't happen from time to time.  You're not alone.      Just because you have your longed for BFP doesn't mean that your entire life has become perfect over night, and that you are not permitted days of being sad or down.  If you need a shoulder to sound off to without posting publicly, feel free to PM me.  

A-Mx


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## Felix42 (Oct 14, 2007)

Estella, I can't add to what Inde has said already but wanted to send you  When you have got your much wanted BFP, it is tempting to think that all should now be well in the world. It doesn't work like that sadly and finding one bit of your life is working out well can highlight how other bits are less than you want and as Inde says highlight that this isn't quite the happily ever after you'd hoped for. The important thing though is that you've taken charge of life separate to your ex and that is empowering in itself and something you will never need to look back on and say why did I wait around for him. Keep strong and as Inde says take one day at a time. Pregnancy hormones are a nightmare & its not easy doing this on our own (well without a partner - we're definitely not on our own here  ) so be easy on yourself. 

Love & hugs, Felix xx


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## estella (Nov 1, 2009)

Thank you both, I have pm'd you both!
Am feeling heaps better again

E xx


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