# My Story and why I think I was successful



## 3rd time lucky (Nov 10, 2009)

Hi,

It is Sunday morning and I've just put my 16 week baby boy back to bed for his morning nap.  I used to read this site all the time through the years I was going through trying for a baby but never posted anything.  I promised myself if I was successful I would post my story (which isn't very exciting) in the hope it may help someone.

After a few years of trying my husband and I reaslised that there was a problem so went to the doctor and told him of our concerns.  The NHS wait seemed quite long to get onto the first step of the process, which was taking clomid (excuse any spelling mistakes!) so we paid about £100 to see a private specialist through a well woman clinic.  Here the doctor did an internal with his 'wand' and saw that I had PCOS so wrote a letter to my doctor asking him to prescribe Metformin.  There was no other reason as to why we had not been successful.  

I started on Metformin and my husband had sperm counts for his motility rate's which were fine but he started taking zinc tablets and drinking lots of water.  We carried on trying and the monthly cycle of hope and heartache began again.  I was desparate for a baby so we saved up, used credit cards and started IVF through Cardiff IVF clinic privately whilst still keeping our names on the NHS list.   It was obviously a lot of money but I felt it was worth if for my mental health if nothing else.  Starting IVF felt like we were doing something very positive towards getting a baby.  My first session was IUI which transferred to IVF and was not successful.  I had all the same feelings that have been discussed all over this site and was devastated.  We went on to our second attempt straight after the first and this was a FET and on Boxing Day 2007 we found out it had failed (this was even more heartbreaking as I had not bled through my 2WW and didn't know that you weren't supposed to on a FET cycle).  I was cold after this failiure and told my husband I needed a break before trying again.  I was already losing weight and I'd stopped smoking but now I knew I had to really look at my lifestyle, diet etc. and get my body and mind in the best possible shape before trying again - and I believe this was the key to my success.

I lost three stone.  Gave up alcohol for a year.  Cut caffine out of my diet ( I was addicted to diet coke).  Started weekly sessions of acupuncutre which I belive was a significant contributing factor as it helped with my stress etc. Stopped using tampax, started a really healthy diet and then a few months before my final IVF session went for a few weeks of REiki where I learnt to be very positive in the lead up and kept repeating to myself 'I am a mum, I am a mum this session will work'.  By the time the session came around I was in no doubt that it would work after all the effort I had put in and it did.  

I was lucky that I didn't have any serious medical conditions to overcome (I had had a laparoscopy to check evertyhing was fine between sessoin 1 and 2) but I realised that the responsibility was with me and at first this was hard to take as all my friends were getting preganant irrespective of their bad habits but, once I'd accepted this was my jouney and I wasn't the same as them I threw myself into making it happen and it has obviously all been worth it.

If you have any questions or thoughts let me know.  Take care,. X


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## crispycreme (Nov 21, 2009)

Wow! What an amazing and inspiring story. Congratulations ! I have just had my second round of IVF and thought I was good going for 3 rounds of accupuncture and eating a bag of raw spinach every day!!!! It sounds like you really gave it your all. if I have a third cycle of IVF (which I am feeling very doubtful of at the minute) I think I will pull out all the stops like you did. Did you go for accupuncture every week? Did your DH go too? How many months before the 3rd cycle did you make all these changes. Hope you don't mind me asking so many questions!!!


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## Ceri. (Sep 6, 2004)

3rd time lucky and welcome to Fertility Friends 

Thanks for sharing your story and huge Congratulations! Hopefully you'll know your way around the site from previous visits but i'll leave you some links which you should find useful now you're a mum! (The birth clubs are great!  Chat to other mums who have babies the same age as your little boy)

Please have a good look around, and revisit the boards, feel free to post in any area, and make yourself at home again. Fertility Friends is such a huge support. There are many who are on their TTC journey, and others, like yourself who have been fortunate to have little ones with assistance. There's a vast amount of information here for everyone, so start reading, posting and getting to know others. You will make some great friends too (add them to your buddy list in your profile!), lots of members often have meet ups locally too, for chats, coffee, shopping or even nights out! You can share conversations with one another freely, simply because we all understand each other. 
Here are some links which you should find really useful at the moment&#8230;&#8230;

*What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~ *   CLICK HERE

*Babydust - Parents place for chat and support ~ *  CLICK HERE 

*Parents general board ~ * CLICK HERE

I know its early days! Dont shoot me down! but here's a link you can come back to if you are intersted 
*Hoping for another miracle ~ **CLICK HERE*

Its not all just serious stuff here, you can also have a bit of fun or just gossip while you are on FF too so check out the general chit chat / jokes / hobbies area:

*Girl & Boy talk - Community & Fun Board ~ *CLICK HERE

You can also chat live in our excellent chat room. We have a newbie day in the chat room every Wednesday where you can meet one of our mods for support, meet other new members and get technical support with navigating the site and using all the functions available here.  CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT 

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. It's a small world!
Keep in touch
Ceri xx


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## 3rd time lucky (Nov 10, 2009)

Hi,

I had my first unsuccessful result in December 2007 then started my second round in Feb 2008 and got a negative on 20th Feb.  I looked back and realised it was probably far too quick between the 1st and 2nd and I hadn't made any changes to help, so despite wanting to get on with the next attempt (although I can totally understand why you feel you can't put yourself through it again) I knew that I needed time to adjust.  I gave myself 7 months off and promised my DH and myself that this break would be worth it.  

Acupuncture is expensive but I tried to go a few times a month (apparently IVF clinics now officially recognise the benefits of acupuncture for fertility in IVF cycles).  My DH didn't go but he could have done a few before giving his sample apparently. It was v. good and after about 3 months my once irratic cycles starting having more predictibility and reduced in lenght, my tounge (read Gillian Mckeith's You are what you eat to understand the relevance of the the appearance of your tounge) changed completely, I was sleeping better and not getting so stressed out.  I'm not sure what percentage of my success I would put down to acupuncture but it was definitely significant.

Don't mind questions at all!  I think if you can look back and say 'I gave it everything' then there is not much more you can do, its just finding a balance between making sensible changes that improve things and not getting too caught up in every bit of advice you are given (you always get the people who say "My friend used to stand on her head singing Orinoko Flo once a day to get pg" and whilst there is part of you that thinks hmm I could give that a go you have to do what is right for you!) 

All the very best with whatever you decide is the right way for you.  x


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## babylove (May 25, 2006)

hi 3rd time lucky,

thank you very much for posting your story and many congratulations on your son..like you, i think that when i finally get my dream i shall try to help others the way you have done as its always encouraging.

Sometimes i think its down to luck and a numbers game and sometimes i think there is a reason why embies dont take coz i have tried my absolute everything but sometimes i think i have tried too much and i need to just let it be. on my last third failed cycle, i dont think i could have been any fitter or healthier. i did everything possibly imaginable. ( i am usually fit anyway but had to be fitter for the cycles)but still no joy so obviously more investigations to be done and at times i just want to stop it all but i know i wud go mad if i did but fed up i am..very!

anyway, not to put a downer on your post.many thanks for encouraging story 

xxx


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## 3rd time lucky (Nov 10, 2009)

Hi,

I understand what you are saying but because after investigations there was seemingly nothing wrong with either me or my husband I couldn't let myself believe it was just down to luck, nor after the first two attempts could I just rely on the IVF clinic, even though they were brilliant.  

It wasn't just the physical and health side of things that I knew I had to tackle.  I found life had become like walking through treacle and the constant dark shadow of not knowing was making me into a different person and I, like you was wondering how long I could carry on for (I had started talking to the adoption team in my area).  This is why I think the reiki helped too (I only had 4 sessions with one between embies coming out and going back in) as the lady was more of a councellor (in fact it was probably more the councelling than the reiki that helped more) it helped me approach the 3rd attempt with a very positive frame of mind and take away any doubts I had about it not working (risky as if didn't work then I would have been in a very dark place).  It is more than a rough ride but you have to believe 100% that it will work.

Never sure how to finish these responses as everything sounds a bit weak but take care. x


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## babylove (May 25, 2006)

3rd time lucky,

dont worry about how to finish ur post hun..am just glad that someone has got something out of being positive..i have given soo much in all my 3 cycles and believe me, there was no cycle i went thru thinking it would never work..i am one of the most positive people in the world (even if i may say so myself   )and am also a christian and believe there is a greater power up above that has control over this things, the bad thing is; no matter how much positivity or things you do in the run up to your cycle, if it isnt your time that can never change the outcome...i know i sound really demoralised here and am probably not helping other people who might be reading this but when all you can do is give and give and give and you get nothing back, it becomes something else and you begin to wonder what the hell you are doing putting yourselg thru so much....
having said that, i am still being strong, as thats the only way to go and as someone famous once said if you are going thru hell, keep going...am doing exacly that, stopping means i continue to burn in this hell of a journey called infertility but dh and i will beat this, that i have no doubt, its just a matter of when..so once again thanks ... i know i am drawing strength from positive stories like yours..

love,
babylove
xxxx


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## HighHopes (Oct 29, 2009)

3rd time lucky - thanks so much for sharing your positive story!  I had egg collection yesterday, 5 embies are growing as we speak and 2 will go back on thursday.  I'm a little nervous, but mostly very positive as I've done all I can physically and emotionally.  Also been having acupuncture - 3 sessions so far, and I'm booked for thurs morning just before et, and again in the afternoon just afterwards.  I'd never had it before, but have been amazed by the feeling of well-being.

Anyway, give your little boy a   from me, and thanks again x


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## Jo 90 (Nov 18, 2009)

Hi 3rd time lucky so happy for your success story  - it also gives me some renewed hope. I too think I didn't wait long enough between my 1st and 2nd IVF cycle and we are now contemplating our third go.

I have to agree with babylove though - as I think its's a luck v's numbers game also. Being fit and healthy seems irrelevant - at least in my case. I love to run! I run about 6 half marathons a year and will be doing the London marathon AGAIN in April 2010 (if I'm not pregnant by then). I regularly run 3 times a week, clocking up around 20 miles - and that's when I'm not even in training for a particular race. I don't drink alcohol or caffeine and have never smoked. I have a healthy diet and lifestyle and a bmi of 20. So, if being fit/healthy is a key factor, then why is it not working for us? (rhetorical question). Don't get me wrong, I mean it has to be a contributing factor but given our circumstance, I can't possibly believe it's vital.

Anyways, the hope your story has given me comes with the acupuncture and reiki. This is something I will definitely be trying before we go for the 3rd attempt - probably in May 2010 (after the marathon)  
For now, I think me and DH will "attempt" to forget ttc and just try and have some fun and be ourselves again for a little while. This infertility malarky is so stressful. That's why I'll be   come the next cycle. Fingers crossed that the acupuncture will help lower my stress levels.


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## babylove (May 25, 2006)

jo,

i know exactly what you mean and you know that is one thing that drives me mad with anger when i start thinking about it..i have however learnt to accept that for some of us the journey will be longer than others and i when i think about what lays ahead, i think i can wait forver to have it and thats comforting..meanwhile, with xmas coming i want to be merry and  have a good time and get back to tx next year, shut this horrible year off and next year, new chapter and hopefully better results than this..
good luck for you hun..

xxx


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## JCG (Nov 14, 2009)

Hi Jo

Thanks for your story and advice. You did so well to make all those changes. 

I'm a bit behind most people on this site. We're still deciding when to take the plunge and go for the first round of IVF. We've been trying for 2 years with no joy. Like everyone we have both had all kinds of tests and no problems have come up. Apparently I am ovulating and so we have no case for clomid and the like. Also confused by the fact that my dh and me both lead really healthy lives - we're both fit and healthy and cafieine free. I have recently given up booze and my hubby doesn't drink much. 
I am interested in the acupuncture though. I feel quite stressed and upset by the whole situation especially as everyone else around me is getting pregnant in a flash. 

How much was the acupuncture and how did you find out about it?

Thanks a million

J x


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## 3rd time lucky (Nov 10, 2009)

Hi

It is very stressful and upseting and I'm not sure most people admit how much it is impacting their mental state.  It is really good that your physical state is in tip top condition as that's one less thing to worry about (although acupuncturists would say you shouldn't be excessive with the exercise as it can create too much heat in your body).

I initially started having reflexology after reading an article in a magazine that said this would help with fertility but after a few months there were no changes to anything and someone (who used acupuncture to get pg) told me that acupuncture was a lot better.  I found a few in my local area and went with a really good one who had successfully treated a few other women with fertility problems.  She charged £30.00 per session, and I had 1 - 2 per month for 6 months.  The results were really obvious within a few weeks and I felt much more able to cope with work (I have got a stressful job) and my toungue had changed a lot (believe it or not it is relevant).  The more I looked into acupuncture the more I realised what a credible and effective treatment option it was for lots of problems but particuarly for infertility.  I would say give it a go but make sure you find one who understands fertllity and you may find you don't have to go down any medical route.

Hope this helps.

Take care.


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## Jo 90 (Nov 18, 2009)

First acupunture treatment tomorrow (£40 for initial consultation and treatment, then £28 per session) - I hope to be a little less stressed for Christmas - seeing as I'll be roasting a turkey for 10 people - that will need an extra couple of treatments alone   hehe


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## livity k (May 19, 2009)

Hi Everyone, 

I'm reading this thread with interest as I've just had a failed fresh and two FET's in fairly quick succession and I'm going to take a break and try to do what you did 3rdtimelucky- I also have PCOS and I could also lose 3 stone- BMI is 30 currently and while my diets fairly healthy I think I could be more consistent. I have already been having acupucnture but in the lead up to treatment and now I think I will focus it on regulate me for a few months.

I think the issue with weight loss is particularly key for PCOS- I'd slightly put it to one side as we have to have ICSI due to my husbands paralysis (I think I felt that if we were trying naturally it would be more relevant) and also after we made 6 lovely embryos in or first cycle, I thought not a prob. But know I'm thinking maybe it is affecting implantation as PCOS affects all your hormone levels. 

I really feel for you Babylove, Jo90 and Jo- it must be so frustrating knowing you are fit, heatlhy and the correct weight and its still not working- but I guess the point of 3rdtime lucky's post was that she did need to make changes to her lifestyle and esp with PCOS that makes a big difference, I'm pretty sure my PCOS triggered when I was at uni and went over a certain weight...

Thanks for your post  3rd time lucky- it has given me extra resolve. Just one qu, were you on metformin through your weight loss- i was on it and think it helped but then stopped taking it. Think I will start again, 

Livity K


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## 3rd time lucky (Nov 10, 2009)

Hi,

Yes I was on Metformin and it really helped.  I was at a weight watching club and I lost about a stone but then stagnated.  I then started taking Metformin and my weight loss started again, I don't think this was a coincidence.

All the best with your break, I found it really refreshing.

x


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