# Has anyone explained death to a 2yr old?



## shivster (Jan 17, 2007)

My dad died on wednesday.      I could go on with the tears but I wont.

We are having difficulties explaining it to our DS

We are Christians and so have used the "granddad  has gone to heaven to be with Jesus" Our son's response was "In church?" 

Just wondering if anyone has any ideas or books that might help explain this one...


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## Viva (May 16, 2005)

Hi Shivster, 
Since having Charlie and Lola with us we have had one of our cats and my Grandad die. Charlie was four at the time and Lola around 2, probably a bit younger than your DS and her speach is not great but her understanding is very good. As a nurse (and a Christian) I have always believed in being as real as possible, I used the word 'died' and explained what that means, we talked about them being in heaven and that that meant we wouldn't see them again on earth. We buried our cat in the garden and we let the children see him explaining that he wouldn't be running around anymore etc etc, we explained that he didn't need his old body anymore because in heaven he would have a new one, Charlie said it would be blue! We also chose to take them both to the funeral and the graveside (a little unusual I know) my sisters also both took their children (Aged nearly two and one) and all of them have been fine with this. Of course we also talked about how people dying can make us sad and that that is OK and to reassure the children we talked about how the Cat and Grandad had died because they were old.
I hope this helps a little, I do beleive that children are more resiliant than we think they will be and if we explain things honestly and simply they will be able to cope with it.
Love Viva
P.S. Just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear of your loss.  
X


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## saphy75 (Mar 15, 2004)

Hi Shivster,

sorry i don't have any advice hun but Viva's sounds like excellent advice

just wanted to send you loads of      and say how sorry i am  and that i am thinking of you  

pam xx


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## Old Timer (Jan 23, 2005)

Hi Shivster

So sorry to read your news (((HUGS)))

No advice but Viva's sounds excellent!

Love
OT x


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

So sorry to read your news  

It is hard for children to comprehend what death is BUT I think Viva has given some really good advice & just be as honest and open as you feel you can without upsetting everyone to much.

Love
Andrea
x


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## Camly (Dec 12, 2006)

hi 

just wanted to say sorry for your loss.

thinking about you and your family

take care  x x x x


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## shivster (Jan 17, 2007)

Thank you all for your replies, particularly Viva.

We wont be taking LB to funeral. He is too lively and I wont have the energy or the inclination to keep him still and occupied. Plus my DH and brothet are pall bearers so that would be awkward both in terms of childcare and complicated explanations!

I have used the word died today and explained that 'Granddad has died and is in heaven now with Jesus' I think we are getting there! 

xx


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## Cotswold Girl (Nov 16, 2006)

So sorry for yor loss   

CG xxxx


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## popsi (Oct 11, 2007)

Shivster

I dont have answers with regard to your little one, but wanted to send you lots of love at this sad time, i lost my father very suddenly 7 years ago so i know how you must be feeling, my heart and prayers are with you all xxxx 

Andrea & dh xx


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## ♥ M J ♥ (Apr 17, 2004)

Hi Shiv

Firstly massive hugs for your loss

My friends little boy passed away last yr aged 3 and she explained to her niece (who was just about to turn 3 when he passed) That her DS has gone to heaven and now lives with other angels and the stars and her Niece offten lets off Ballons and looks and talks to the stars when wanting to talk to her cousin- maybe you could let of a special ballon with your DS to your Dad

xxx


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## magenta (Nov 2, 2004)

My 'favourite' way of explaining death to the children in my sunday school class (ages 0 - 4) is by using the book waterbugs and dragonflies. It is never easy to explain such a huge concept to children but I found the story makes it a bit easier. It is a short story and helps children to understand about people they love not coming back ever again.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Waterbugs-Dragonflies-Doris-Stickney/dp/0826471811/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1224497016&sr=1-1

We have also done a bit of follow-up work with children (including our DD) about loss and grief and feeling sad about someone not being part of our lives anymore and it helped the littel children a lot to understand that it takes a long time for people to feel better after someone dies.

Maggie

/links


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

Shivster, I have no words of advice better than the ones you have been given. 

I just want to say I am sorry for your loss  

Cindy


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## everhopeful (Feb 19, 2004)

Shivster

 My sincere condolences for your sad loss.

Lots of love and thoughts

xx


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## jilldill (Feb 2, 2006)

Shivster,
Just want to add my condolences our thoughts are with you and your family.
Love JD x


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## shivster (Jan 17, 2007)

Hello all,

We finally held the funeral last tuesday and it was as good as it could ever be really. A perfect service for Daddy. Little bear went to the zoo with our goddaughter and her parents and had a great day! 

Thanks for everyones thoughts and condolences, we are getting there...

Shivster xx


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Shivster

Give yourself time honey, you will get there.

I lost my dad 22 years ago now, he was aged 40, I was 19.

I have nothing but fond memories of my dad, I miss him terrible. 

I miss that he was unable to give me away when I married my lovely DH. 

I'm sad he missed us being matched with our beautiful 2 children BUT what kept me going through all this is that I KNEW he was looking down on me from above & that he sends his love for me and my family.

Your dad does the same.

Love
Andrea
x


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