# SCARED



## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Guys

I'm completely new to all of this but thought that posting on here may stop me from loosing my mind. I have spent many months reading other peoples stories and have taken so much comfort from knowing i'm not alone out there.

So a little bit about me, I'm 34 and have started my first round of ICSI today after what feels like an eternity. We have been trying to conceive for around 7 years now and we found out last year it's down to my partner having a low sperm count. So far, my prognosis has been good, so I am taking that as a positive.

I'm hoping someone out there is at the same stage as me or if anyone has any advise for anything I can do give me the best possible chance in this succeeding. I amgoing out of my mind with worry that this won't work and that I am not going to be strong enough to cope with a negative result.


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## lou-lou12 (Jan 31, 2012)

Hi Marbles....

I had ICSI last year.... DH had a vasectomy and had to have surgical sperm retrieval..... I have no known issues and we had a bfp straight away!! It worked 1st time for us but unfortunately it worked a bit too well and the egg split resulting in identical twins which is a high risk preg due to them sharing a placenta and we lost them at 19 weeks  

We were devastated    But we have to be brave and give ourselves the best possible chance of having a baby so we are embarking on our FET journey next week  

Good luck and try not to worry and overthink things too much xxx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi lou-lou12

Thank you for posting, I can't imagine how devasting that must have been but it's really inspirational that your being so positive and can spare a moment to try and help me. 

I will keep my fingers crossed for you on the next stage of your journey and hope for a positive result for us both


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hey marbles
I started my stimms yesterday. In the same boat at the same time so to speak.
Try not to worry, you are going to be just fine. 
Be brave and stay positive.
Where are you being treated?
B


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Thanks for posting, that's fab news   I'm being treated in Southampton, how about you?


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## Betty-Boo (Oct 14, 2007)

and welcome to Fertility Friends   

I've included some forum boards that may help answer some of you questions   

*Cycle Buddies ~ *CLICK HERE

*Diagnosis ~ *CLICK HERE

*IVF Boards ~ *CLICK HERE

*Male Factors ~ *CLICK HERE

Have a look round the site and if you get a little stuck with the navigation side of things - please shout!

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. This is especially useful to find people who may be using the same clinic and or in the same PCT area. CLICK HERE

We also have a chat room - which is a fabulous place to 'meet' and chat with others. Our newbie chat is every Wednesday. A great chance to meet other new members and find out a little more about how the site works.

*Newbie chat ~ *CLICK HERE

All the best - our paths may cross again in other areas of the site.
Good luck,

  

Tis xx


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## SMP (Jul 2, 2012)

Marbles said:


> Hi Guys
> 
> I'm completely new to all of this but thought that posting on here may stop me from loosing my mind. I have spent many months reading other peoples stories and have taken so much comfort from knowing i'm not alone out there.
> 
> ...


Hi Marbles,

I am in a very similar position to you.

Im 33 and earlier this year we found out that my husband too like yours has a low sperm count and after trying for about 3 years have had no luck so far. We are awaiting our fisrt appointment and Its this friday!

Trying to be strong but am a bit nervous and worried as dont really know what to expect... im sure it will be fine but I think I only just got my head round to the fact that we have to have ivf so feel like Im a bit unprepared for this appointment. (got a call this morning that they had a cancellation at the clinic, had appointment arrnaged for september and now its 4 days away so feel like I dont know enough or havnt reasearched enough going into the appointment! argh)

anyway just wanted to say 'hi' and remind you that your not alone in this journey...

Hope it all goes well for you....the very best of luck.

Smp x


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hi marbles
Just a quick one as heading out to work. We didn't qualify for nhs so being treated privately at Gennet clinic in Prague.
How you feeling? 
Bx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hello all

Well I'm on day 2 and apart from a blinding headache I am feeling really good. I have been a bit of a space cadet today, however, I am putting that down to a rather early start and hoping it's not a side effect of the drugs  I had a lovely jog last night, which really helped to clear my head but do not think I have the energy to do anything tonight.

SMP, don't worry about not being prepared enough for the appointment as we were pretty much clueless when we went along but after speaking to the consultant I felt much better. I don't know about you but I pretty much feel like the kid at the back of the class trying to keep up with all the information being presented during this journey   I'm sure we will both get there and good luck for the appointment.

Beckysh, I am counting my blessings that we were lucky enough to secure NHS funding. How are you doing today?

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hi Marbles
Im on day 6 today.  1st scan in the morning...cant wait to see if the drugs have made anything happen!!    Mostly i feel tired and have period pains but other than that im completely fine.
What about you?
B x


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

How did the scan go? I have mine tomorrow. I'm doing ok, starting to feel uncomfortable each day as my stomach is bloating and I'm getting period pains mostly in the eve. Was going to call the clinic to see if there is anything I can do/take as I'm having trouble getting into my work clothes!

Off to work now so will check in later

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hi ya,
I have been totally fine with no real symptoms or bloating so far.
Scan ok, 10 follicles...all growing at the same rate just about. They have increased dose of my meds for next 2 days and then scan Saturday. Flying out to Prague tomorrow where it is raining.
Good luck tomorrow... Let me know how you get on 
Xx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Glad to hear all is going well for you and the best of luck in Prague. 

I have just got back from my day 5 scan to find that only have 3 large follicles, the rest appear to be doing nothing, with the nurse ruling out all follicles on my right ovary! I'm waiting for the clinic to ring to see whether my drugs need to increase. Have my next scan on Monday, so just praying that some more follicles develop over the weekend as even as a newbie I know this doesn't look good.

Keep me updated as I need to have a good news story to keep me going

Marles xxx


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## ELKA82 (May 24, 2012)

Hiya Marbles.

I am sure you can do with positive stories. We just had ICSI done and i am 6 weeks pregnant tomorrow. From first try    We had sperm retrieval and i am perfectly fine. Still cant believe but it is happening at first go.
Be positive, its making big difference.

Good luck with your journey


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hi ya
How did your scan go today? I haven't been on ff much as been out and about in Prague. 
I too have had not fab news. My day 9 scan showed 10 follys, all small. Drugs have changed and increased and another scan tomorrow. Fingers crossed, as already going to have to stay longer coz of this. Hubby has to leave to go back to work. 
Let me know how you are
B x


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Hugs to you as I know it's horrid when things like this happen, especially if you have to stay on by yourself 

I had another scan today and have 3 large follicles still but with the potential that a further 4 may be OK by Wednesday. I'm booked in for egg retrieval on Wednesday morning, so last injection tonight  

Will keep everything crossed for us both. Let me know how it goes and message me if you need to chat.

Keep smiling we are all routing for you.

Marbles xxx


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## prayingforababy (Jul 12, 2012)

Hi Marbles,

I just wanted to say Hi! 

Im a little bit ahead of you but in a very similar position (my signature will fill you in if your interested). Im new to this site but have found it to be so useful over the last couple of weeks.

Im currently on my 2ww, which is driving me insane but im staying as positive as I can for hopefully a BFP  .

Good luck with EC Wed, hope all goes well.

xxx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi prayingforababy

Thanks for posting, I must admit I am very nervous this evening but just want to get EC over with now. I am feeling really uncomfortable today and have just tried to absorb myself at work to take my mind of the throbbing in my stomach area. I'm praying for at least 5 good eggs, to give me the best chances possible   . Selfishly, I am also hoping I might also start deflating, so some of my clothes fit again. Got on the scales and found have put on half a stone, which was a surprise as the clinic didn't mention anyting about weight gain at this stage.

I must admit I haven't thought about the next stage but from looking at the posts on the site it really does appear to be that at each stage there are different worries. When they tell you it's going to be a rollercoaster, they certainly are not joking   I can imagine the wait to be excruciating, are you working through it or have you taken the time off to put your feet up?

Sending lots of positive energy your way and hoping for a positive result for you    

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hey marbles
Good luck today hon, i am thinking of you and sending you loads of everything


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi all

Thought I would check in briefly. Had EC today and they managed to collect 4 eggs. Today, certainly was not without it's drama DH had to give two specimens because the first had only 1 sperm  

Whilst I can smile now I nearly cried at the time, it has all ended up fine and I'm praying that my little eggs get jiggy and all fertilise. 

Hope your all fine 

Hugs

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Well done you... That's a good result, and better than you were expecting too.

I would have been in a right old panick if the sperm problem had happened to us ... Sounds like a performance!
we are all set for EC tomorrow, can't wait to get it over and done with because I generally feel terriv
Ble, bloated and shattered.

Keep me posted with your updates. I'm gonna just send you lots of       

B x


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## prayingforababy (Jul 12, 2012)

Marbles- that's wonderful news regarding EC, remember you only do need one hun! I too remember being really bloated prior to EC and gained 8.5LB's in total, I think if the clinic told us all the what if side effects we would be nervous wreck's (more than we already are). How do you feel? The couple of days after EC I felt a bit un-comfortable, drink plenty of water and eat alot of protein (it's helps with OHSS).

Thanks for all your positiveness. Im still waiting and   that I dont get my period.

xxxx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Morning ladies

Beckysh keeping my fingers crossed for you on your EC, hopefully the extra waiting will mean extra eggs for you.

Just had the call to say we have 2 embryos, the other two eggs were immature. They have provisionally booked me to have them implanted tomorrow morning but will make a call on whether we can hold off until day 3.

Not sure how I feel right now, I'm just praying that they are both of good quality and will still be ok throughout this stage.

Will check in soon

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Morning
Good luck for today love, I am assuming you are getting a day 2 transfer?
I'm awake at crack of dawn as going for EC this morning, will check in later to let you know how I did.
B x


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Had did EC go and how are you feeling?

I can't sleep as going in for a day 3 transfer today. Was provisionally booked in for day 2 but they called first thing to say they were fine and looking like class 2 so wanted to hold on another day. I think its because I'm under 37 and they would prefer to do a single transfer. Not sure how I feel about leaving one behind so will have a chat about my options later.

Big hugs

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hey you

So, how did it go?
Im not sure what you meant by leaving one behind?  Does that mean they have only let you have one put back?  Perhaps the other one will get to blast and you will get one to freeze?
I dunno.. im not up on all this stuff.

Well, for me EC was okay apart from the drama when they couldnt get a cannula into me.  they did it in my foot in the end!  
I got 11 eggs, 9 fertilised and today have 6 on the go.  
Its an anxious waiting game
Let me know how you are
Becky x


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Well done on all those lovely eggies that have fertilised.
. Ouch about the injection in the foot, that must have been a nightmare. Hoping that the drama on EC day means we will both be lucky and can look back and laugh in the future. How much longer are you staying out there, will they wait for day 5 transfer?

I have had both embryos popped back in. As they were class 2 this was possible, they also mentioned that i had a slightly elevated FSH. Not sure what this means but threads suggest it means that responsibleness to stimm. Refuse to panic and want to have one day of joy! Now just have to sit tight until the 1 Aug  

Marbles xxx


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

God my spelling was terrible! Think an elevated FSH level has something to do with why I did not respond so well to stimm.


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## Lee danielle (Jun 22, 2012)

Good luck girls just been reading your posts!!!
Fingers and toes crossed for you all!    
This forum is so good as its good to talk to people that understand what your going through 

Love and hugs


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## prayingforababy (Jul 12, 2012)

Hi Everyone,

Just thought Id update you. It was my OTD yesterday and we had a BFN confirmed by blood test. Words can't describe how upset we are. This is going to be a long and emotional journey and I realise now this is only the beginning for us. Our dream is on hold for now as the clinic have told me they will look into the ? hydrosalpinx and get me into see the consultant before looking into having our 1 remaining frozen embryo transfer. I'm upset even writing this and am constantly analysing WHY US It's so unfair but I pray one day it will be our turn to be parents.

Good luck to everyone for the future and thanks to all of you who supported me through my 2ww xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hey praying
I'm so sorry to hear your news... I'm sending you lots of virtual hugs  
Becky xxxx
Marbles- you ok love?
Sorry for short post.. On iPhone , rubbish wi to x


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Morning ladies

Prayingforababy: I am absolutely gutted for you and send you lots of hugs    This journey is hard and will be different for us all, so you need to take some time out and get strong again. Hold on to the hope that it will happen, it's just a question of when. Keep us posted on where you go from  here.

Beckysh: Well how are you and all those lovely eggies?

Me: I'm fine, 2WW is torture and I am convinced that it hasn't worked for me. I have stared to feel more and more like my old self, with just the sore boobs and a slight pain in the pubic area every now and again - apparently side effects of the crinone. Going to see my friend later who is the most positive person in the world and hoping some of her positivity will wear off on me     

I so want this to work for us but know deep down I need to be realistic as it doesn't happen for us all. Praying that we will be lucky   

Speak soon 

Marbles xxx


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## Beckysh (May 12, 2012)

Hi ya Marbles
Im home.  Had my ET today so the dreaded wait begins.
Keep your spirits up love, im sure it will all be perfect for you.  You will be lucky    
Keep in touch
Becky


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## Marbles (Jun 20, 2012)

Hi Beckysh

Glad to hear your finally home. I hope your putting your feet up and getting some rest. Sending lots of positive vibes and sticky thoughts to your 2 little embies    

I'm doing OK today, I think the 2ww sends us all a bit  . Keep on touch and let me know how your getting on.

Speak soon 

Marbles xxx


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