# Endometriosis and very low AMH - First time IVF



## MummyBear10

Hi

I am new here and am really hoping that I can find women with similar situations as me to share experiences. I was diagnosed with severe Endometriosis in March 2009. For years I have suffered with sever pain with my monthly cycle. I get very severe cramps which make me sick and a diagnostic laparoscopy and MRI of bowel identified that Endometriosis has caused my left ovary to stick to my bowel and I also have narrowing of the bowel due to Endometriosis of the bowel. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for over 18 months. We were due to start IVF early January however I received AMH results just before Christmas and was told that my results are very low (2.49) and that our best option would be egg donor. This was a real shock as I am only 31!. My consultant has said that the results indicate reduced ovarian reserve and has said that my response to hormonal stimulation for IVF with my own eggs will be very low and we have less than 5% chance of success. He has also suggested that severe endometriosis has impact on eqq quality and that there is a strong chance that endometriosis reduces chances on implantation. Despite all of this we have decided to give IVF a go with my own eggs and are due to start treatment with my February cycle which will be in about 4 weeks. We are having short cycle and have been told I will start Supercr and a day after 6 ampoules daily Menopur. I totally understand that we have very little chance of treatment working but I need to pursue treatment if only to get closure on ever having a baby of my own. I have already read some experiences on here of women who have had success with low AMH levels which has given me tiny glimmers of hope but I am wondering if anyone with low AMH and Endometriosis has had success with their own eggs?

This has got to be the darkest experience of my life so far! It is so difficult dealing with the ups and downs of infertility as well as suffering from a chronic disease which kindly gives me a monthly reminder!!!! I have found this site really helpful so far as it makes me realise that I am by far not the only one going through this, although it certainly feels like it at times.

I look forward to talking with some of you and sharing experiences xxx


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## Wraakgodin

to FF, Caa!! This is a great website for support, information, laughter and friendship, it has kept me (relatively!) sane though all my treatment. I don't know how I would have coped without the lovely people here. Have a good look round the site, post in whatever section you want and make yourself at home. There are so many sections here with a huge amount of information, so whatever you are going through there will be someone here to help you.

I haven't any personal experiences with endometriosis, but I can point you in the direction of the part of the site that deals with it - CLICK HERE

Here are a couple of other links that I think might help you.

A Rough Guide To IVF ~CLICK HERE

IVF General chat ~ CLICK HERE

While undergoing treatment, you might find it useful to join other ladies having treatment at the same time. The Cycle Buddies threads are just for that. Just pop along to the appropriate month and say "Hi" when you are ready to start treatment ~ CLICK HERE

The What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) thread will give you some info on how to navigate the site ~ CLICK HERE

We also have a newbie night in the chat room every Wednesday where you can meet other new members and a few more experienced (I won't use the term "old"!) members will be there to answer any questions you have about the site. CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT

If you look on the main forum index you will find location boards. You can find others in your area, and even people going to the same clinic who will provide invaluable advice - some groups even have meet ups. I saw you mention Leicester on another post, here is the link to the Leicstershire section - CLICK HERE

Please feel free to ask more questions here, or on any other part of the site, there will be wonderful helpful people there to give you lots of support, information and cyber hugs if you need it. We go through all the highs and lows of treatment together.

I will keep my fingers crossed and hope that your treatment works out         

Sue


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## frannyboo

Hi Caa,
I'm in a similar position to you I think; Stage 4 Endo, 1 laparoscopy and 2 laparotomies.  My most recent laparotomy (Dec 2010) was similar to previous ones, like you, I had everything stuck to my bowel.  In the end one of my ovaries had to be removed because it had been so badly damaged by the endometriosis and resulting surgery. My NHS consultant is suggesting that DE may be our way forward too as I've got high FSH levels, again as a result of the endo.... 
We're going to our ivf clinic in the next few weeks to have an AMH test and ultrasound so that they can be a little more accurate about whether or not my ovary has failed but I'm terrified that they'll refuse to proceed with my eggs; not even giving me a chance to try.

I can say that there are lots of heartening stories out there where people have been told it's not possible to conceive as a result of similar situations. Sometimes these make me feel better, sometimes loads worse.
On bad days I'm absolutely furious about the endo and how it's knackered my fertility;  I'm only 5 weeks out of my last lap and good days are in short supply at the mo!
As I said, I'll know more in a few weeks but I think I can relate.  The crippling monthly pain is one thing but the fertility experience really does put the cherry on the cake XX


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## scoobylooby

Hi there... 


I was eventually diagnosed with endometriosis and low AMH and was also advised to have DIVF. This was 2 years ago and i know exactly how devastated you are feeling. 
I did go for x2 IVF attempts with my own eggs (even though i was told i would not produce any eggs!) I did produce some as it happened. All became grade 1 embryos. Sadly it was not successful.... but i will say this. Despite being about 12k lighter it was worth the try. The process of trying with my own eggs has helped me to accept my present situation and i am about to go for DIVF next week.. feeling like it's the right path for me.
Like you.. i trawled FF and the internet generally to find success stories and they are there! I think it is worth a shot. One consultant advised me not to do it.. and one said "it only takes one good egg, and you may regret it if you don't have one attempt" i tend to agree with the latter. 
I wish you lots of luck with your cycle. Mother nature can sometimes surprise us... 


All the best xxx


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## frannyboo

Hi Scoobs (didn't think I'd type that today!)
Think you've just confirmed how I feel; I need to at the very least try with my eggs to get onto the next stage snd if that doesn't work proceed with DE.
People on here keep saying it only takes 1 egg and I think I'm finally getting that!
Did clinic confirm if endo had had an effect on your previous ivf cycles?
Xxx


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## Eesha44

Hi Caa

We seem to have some similarities!

I was also given the 5% chance by the consultant, and i also have low AMH (3 point something) and a bit of endometriosis... our treatment also sounds very similar - I am on 2 x 3 ampoules of menapur (450) and I am now on day 11....had a couple of scans and i have 6 follicles all of which seem to be growing, and another scan tomorrow to see how they are getting on. The research and the technology etc seem to be advancing all the time, and the percentage they give you is based on so many variables, in short, you never know whether you will be one of the 5% ... the way i see it is that you as an individual either get pregnant or you dont, 50 / 50, which i know isnt a very scientific way of looking at it but it helps my head! 

I wish you all the very best, xxx


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## scoobylooby

Hi Franny! 
I don't think it is possible to know exactly why the cycles failed.. i think it is assumed if your AMH is low and FSH high your eggs are no good. I think the endo caused damage to my ovaries and it has been said the reduced blood supply post surgery can hinder egg quality. It's so hard for anyone to pinpoint exactly... especially when women with great eggs and no problems at all don't get pregnant after several IVF's as well! It's impossible to say who will be successful really!


eesha you sound like me.. identical doses of menopur and same number of follies... i know the 5% thing is a long shot and the doc's all think you are potty for even trying... but someone has to be in that 5% and why not you? Don't need to to get scientific about that!


Follow your instincts ladies...  then at least you can have no regrets. It is such a tough little journey... but keep on going xxx


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## MummyBear10

Wraakgodin - Thank you for the guidance has been really helpful. x 

Frannyboo - It does sound as if we are in very similar situations. I have only had a diagnostic laparoscopy so far as my consultant wanted me to try IVF before having surgery as he was concerned about the amount of damage that would be caused to my ovary's as a result of removing the endometriosis. As far as I am aware my FSH is normal although the very low AMH is a big concern. Initially the clinic that I am at said that they would not be able to go forward with treatment because of my AMH level (mainly as I would affect their statistics) however my consultant has said that he will support us with one attempt to see how I respond - so I don't see why you should be refused a go with your own eggs. I too get very angry about having endometriosis sometimes as I feel that it has taken over my body and my life. The pain is so bad every month that I darn't book holidays or make arrangements in advance incase my period decides to show its ugly head! The way I am trying to look at it is that when the clinic told me they would not be able to treat me I was at my all time low and now think that things can only get better. I hope your AMH levels come back ok xx

Scoobylooby - Thanks for sharing your experiences. I am sorry to hear that things have not worked out for you and yes I agree that it is worth a shot with my own eggs. I started my period at the weekend and am planning on going ahead with starting treatment in about 26 days with my next cycle. I understand that my chances are very low and although I am holding out a small amount of hope for the golden egg I am also treating it as closure to the possibility of having my own baby. If it doesn't work out then I plan on having my operation to remove the endometriosis so at least I ca have some quality of life x

Eesha44 - It is very comforting to hear from people in similar situations and I wish you all the very very best with your treatment. I will be starting injections in about 4 weeks. Please let me know how you get on xxx


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## frannyboo

Hi Caa, 
Sounds like you've got yourself a good consultant. I wish my consultant had considered the knock-on effects and damage surgery would cause. She's proactive, which was great after being in pain for so long; but she's a bit chop-happy!
Are amh and fsh not always commensurate then?

Really glad to see this thread taking off; I've been really struggling this week. I've convinced myself that my ovaries have already failed and am spending so much time in my head that I've really wound myself up. Quite difficult to keep a positive mental attitude!!
Any advice ladies?

Hope you're having a good and positive week.

** Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Well my AMH is dire!!! 2.49 but FHS is normal. I still have regular (although light) periods and I get ovulation pain. AMH is reason why I have been given only 5% chance but I cant help but wonder if this is because my ovaries are covered in endometriosis. I guess I will find out in Feb 

I know what you mean about convincing yourself ovaries are failing. I had my first period since finding out my AMH start at weekend and I had convinced myself it wasnt going to come. My periods have been getting lighter but this one was fairly good which has set my mind at ease. I wish I had never had AMH tested as it has thrown me into an emotional roller-coaster. I wish they had just let me go ahead with treatment and seen how i responded as this is what I am doing now anyway xxx


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## frannyboo

Guess we are in the same boat then; Feb is a big month for both of us.
Dh and I are off to clinic in morning so he can do the deed in the little boy's room.
Silly bugger's excited! Bless him.

Where are you having treatment Caa? Confused about your clinic being negative but your consultant being positive, how does that work?

Am still waiting for my period. 3 days late now. Hope it turns up soon cos the suspense is killing me; just want to crack on with things now. Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Frannybo

Are you starting IVF tomorrow then?
I am starting short cycle in about 3 weeks when next period shows.
Very nervous but also looking forward to finding out the actual situation with my eggs.
I am having treatment at Leicester Fertility Clinic (Private Patient)
The clinic do not suggest treatment with very low AMH but my consultant has said that he will support us with one treatment just to see for sure how I respond. 
I am just holding on to the hope that I respond better than science is saying. I have a good feeling about it but I think that is just my way of getting through it.
I really wish you all the best and would really like it if we can keep each other updated and share our journey x


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## frannyboo

No, just his sperm test yesterday. Was our first visit to the clinic tho so whilst no treatment or advice was given I feel better simply for having gone there. It was a nice environment.
I think keeping track and keeping eCh other updated would be great. I'd like that very much. 
I think I'll find out wgT my clinic recommend about the same time as you start your treatment
All the best lovely, frannyboo


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## MummyBear10

Frannyboo

How do I create the pink cycle info under my posts?


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## frannyboo

Hiya,
Click on the link near the top of the page 'Profile', then select 'Forum profile' from the dropdown.
When your profile opens the box you want is the one labelled 'Signature'.
Update this and you're done!
Xxx


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## MummyBear10

frannyboo, scoobylooby and Eesha44.


How is it all going with you all? any of you having treatment? I am due to start short cycle IVF in about 10 days with next period and am really anxious now. I hope i respond better than they think xx


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## frannyboo

I'm still waiting for 1) AF and 2) my first appt. I needed AF to arrive so that I can have my amh and antral follicle scan. Sadly AF still not here and my appt. is next Friday so just having amh done.

I've been having acupuncture every week which has helped calm me and trying to keep my pma up!
What date do you start? Have you had your training?


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## LouLou28

Hey Ladies,

So nice to hear your stories on this topic there has to be some hope for us right and I like the theory of 50/50 chance of falling pregnant still! 
I do believe you need to try your own eggs first for your own sanity  

Me and my DH are on Day 9 of short protocol due to bad endo found last year then AMH at 2.3 or something ridiculous at only 28 but having to get your head round it is the most difficult part maybe not knowing is the success sometimes but then part of me is grateful too in some weird way as least you know the deck you have been dealt.. 
We are with a Private clinic and when we had failed IVF last year they just said although low AMH my eggs were good quality and so should move to short protocol he never suggested DE but have been thinking if this tx doesn't work again then that is our next option really not sure how it works so will cross that when time comes another hard decision but if it gets that end dream of a family why would you not follow it  
We are on 5x Menopur powders from yesterday and 4 maybe 5 good growing eggs so watch this space was wishing for more but as were doing ICSI this time hoping less eggs yet more fertilised to put 2x back in would be great!! 

 and   for all cycles - Feb sounds like a busy month good luck girls and would love to know how you all get on and if need to chat on the fun rollercoaster lol.
xox


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## scoobylooby

Hi Girls...


i am due to test after my first DIVF cycle the day after tomorrow.. so i am way down the line from where you guys are, but my thoughts are with you all trying with your own eggs. Keep this thread going so i can see how you guys do as i am really interested.. i truly believe it is worth giving it a go. 


Caa- i remember a consultant emphatically telling me that no amount of drugs would make me produce eggs and i then went on to pop out 4 after short protocol high dose menopur...( she then of course said..."ah yes... this is about what we would expect!   ) They don't  know how you will respond until you are stimmed... they can only GUESS. Sending you lots of luck and good wishes xxx


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## frannyboo

Scoobs,
Oh my gaaaaawd!  Absolute best of luck to you, keep your chin up; really hoping you'll get what you want and deserve on Thursday.
How are you feeling hun?
Xxx


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## frannyboo

Scoobs; I hope you're ok; you haven't posted so I hope that's because something nice has happened?! All the best, Franny


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## scoobylooby

sadly not ladies.... got a BFN a couple of days ago. Was told to stop meds and wait for AF. Gutted as you may imagine, after having x2 goes with a less than 5% chance i thought a 50-60% chance would come up trumps for me    ..... I asked the nurse at Serum not to tell me if my spare embryo's made it to blast before freezing whilst i was on my 2ww..as i couldn't face knowing that was the end of the line. She did send me an e-mail back saying that it was good news... so i am hoping i have 1-2 blasts to use (fingers crossed)


I think Penny form Serum will call me for a chat today. We are so skint now... i just can't see another fresh cycle on the cards. 


It has been a tough couple of days... 


hope all you lovely ladies are ok.. Lou Lou any news?? Do keep us posted xxx


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## frannyboo

Awww Scoobylou. I'm so sorry Hun.  
I'm not sure what else to say other than the 'good news' from your nurse suggests it's not the end of the line for you...  hoping that those blasts are top notch.
Time for a (cheap) weekend treat? How about dinner with your dh using a voucher from money saving expert? http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/deals/cheap-restaurant-deals 
It's not a BFP but it's time away from home for you both? Xxx

/links


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## MummyBear10

Scooby

I am so so sorry to hear your news.  Sending you big 
I   that you have success with your blasts xx
Wish I could say more to make you feel better but just try to take care of yourself and look to the future hun xxxxxxx
Thinking of you x


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## scoobylooby

Thanks girls... i feel a bit mean posting on this thread because it's not about donor IVF... i came on here to support you guys with your own eggs.... not to moan about me!!!


I had hoped to give you good news though.. to give you guys a positive picture of a possible future treatment, if you needed it.. which i am hoping you don't of course.


It always takes a little while to pick yourself up after a BFN.. but  i am not beaten yet xxx


P.S thanks for the link Franny... i am going to print off a cheap meal deal! yay!! i am already a groupon fan!!


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## frannyboo

Hi Scoobylou, 
Don't feel mean; you've been here for us and we're here for you too.'my colleague is in Groupon, had never heard of it until last week but she's just had a lovely facial and massage for a bargain price so I hope you get something nice.
Glad you're down but not out darlin' xxx


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## MummyBear10

Scooby

Don't feel bad. We are here to support you just as much as you are to support us.
Keep positive huni, easier said than done I'm sure but there is always hope! xxx


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## LouLou28

Hi Girlies,

Scooby - Sorry to hear your news Huge   to you and DH and thinking of you but that is good news on remaining blasts congratulations... that Groupon thing looks wicked definitely treat yourselves and enjoy eachothers company again as this is a such a tough rollercoaster we do forget what great relationships we must have to withstand this kinda pressure on us!! 

Have a Large wine for us too hee

We had EC this morning 4x collected apparently so now just the wait to see if took to being ICSI'd 2mo afternoon - feel mixed emotions at the moment will feel calmer when know if it's even ONE just gotta b ONE at least pleaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeee  

Sorry that was my release of tension lol So how are you all feeling today

Hope you have a fab weekend..
xox


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## MummyBear10

Fingers crossed for you LouLou


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## scoobylooby

Ooooh! Lou Lou! 4 is good! Well done you. I bet you will get  some good embies out of that lot... fingers crossed. Oh i am pleased for you! Can't wait to hear what happens!


Yes you are so right about having little treats for yourself through all this treatment... it can become quite a drudge at times! I am feeling a little better today.. but obviously still kind of raw. Franny i am off to bar ha ha for a cheap lunch tomorrow thanks to you!


xx


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## frannyboo

We'll done and fingers crossed for you Lou Lou. 

And Scoobs have a nice lunch tomorrow; on the upside you can have a large glass of wine with that there lunch, seems you've earnt a little wine-buzz for being so lovely.

Also as Groupon seems to be all the rage I've signed up for that today, so thank YOU Scoobs.

I'm playing my first hockey match in over 2 months tomorrow; really looking forward to letting out some tension!
Xxx


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## MummyBear10

LouLou glad all is going well. Will keep everything crossed for strong embies tomorrow!    

I have got start of period cramps today which is early at day 21 but thinking I might be starting injections sooner than I though.

Hope you all have a lovely weekend and  I  that it all works out for us all x


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## MummyBear10

Oh and Franny enjoy the hockey match! xxx


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## LouLou28

Morning ladies,

Sorry not good news for us this morning i'm afraid, had early call saying only 1x egg could have ICSI and doesn't look to b growing so going to keep till Monday but looks like all over before even began  

Feel so dumb another shattered illusion - does this ever end for us!!   

Don't mean to bring you guys down so will love ya and leave ya for now - hope you have a better weekend than us though  
xox


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## frannyboo

Hi Lou Lou, 
Big hugs my darling, please don't give up.
I know it's self-preservation but all over this site there are ladies who are living proof of the adage 'it only takes one egg'. Big hugs and praying for a positive start to next week for you. Xxx


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## MummyBear10

LouLou 
  
that things turn out better than you expect Monday
It is a long and painful journey but I agree with Frannyboo - don't give up hope huni!
I don't really know what else to say other than you are in my thoughts

xxxxxxxx


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## cheekycat1

Hi Caa,
Im a new member too (this is my first reply!).
I have the same as you - Endo sticking my tubes, ovary, womb and bowel together.  Very painful every month.  I had a normal FSH but terrible antral follicle count and my consultant says the Endo has 'eaten away' at my ovaries.  The positive I can give you is that on my first IVF I got one grade 1 embryo, and it only takes one!  I kept myself strong by remembering it does only take one - there are a lot of people (including the clinics) who get very hung up on numbers of follicles/eggs.    
I've now been told (after 2nd attempted cycle) there is no point carrying on with my own eggs.  I did strongly feel that I had to have at least 2 goes to see what my body could produce though and I'd advise you to do the same (if you can afford to) so you can feel you've done everything you can before you go down the donor egg route.  
Good luck xx


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## roryroo

hi caa think im in a similar situation to you iv got stage4 endo and have had 3 laps to drain it iam having treatment at care in manchester and am about to have the chicago bloods.my amh ws also rubbish at 4 but my consultant said he wouldnt be put off by that as it only takes 1 egg.iv been told to make this my last go as im 39 this year and anyway i can only afford one go at £10000 including tests etc.have you had ur endo drained? iv been told mine is stuck to bowel etc and will need a hysterectomy to remove it properly but shouldnt stop me getting pregnant iv had 3 ivfs and now they think iv got something wrong with my blood hence chicago blood tests plus iv just had to get thru my sister having twins from her 1st go of icsi.dony give up


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## MummyBear10

Hi roryroo and cheekycat

It does sound as if we are all in a very similar boat at the minute and a boat that is certainly very rocky

roryroo - Why is your treatment costing £10000 mine is just under £3000 a cycle + consultations?
In response to your question, No I have not yet had my endo surgically treated as my consultant has suggested there would be a lot of ovary damage and also possible bowel resection so wants me to ttc first. If treatment doesn't work I will be going forward with the operation though.

cheekycat. 
Grade 1 emby is great on first attempt although I am really sorry that things haven't worked out for you.  
I have started to get my head around the fact that IVF may not work for us and have adjusted to the egg donor route but I am giving it my best shot and holding on to hope that I get the golden egg!. I think my clinic will only support us with one attempt of IVF unless I respond better than what they are predicting.

All Ladies

Well the time has finally come and I am off to the clinic tomorrow morning for my first scan, blood test and injection training. I am on short cycle so straight into stimming. It is my first time so I am a little nervous about injections etc but after a very long wait and lots of anticipation I am looking forward to getting started now and getting all the questions that have been whirling around in my head for such a long time answered.

Hope you are all well and having a positive week xxx


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## frannyboo

Hi Caa, lots of luck tomorrow. I've got my first consultation Friday; will find out what my options are. Dreading it!  Will be on here wailing one way or the other on friday night! xx

Lou Lou, if you feel like it; please let us know how you are doll. 
Hi to newbies, this is turning into a lovely thread so stick with it! 
Love to everyone else, FBoo Xxx


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## frannyboo

Ps Scoobs, how was Ha Ha? Xxx


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## cheekycat1

Good luck Caa for tomorrow.  The injections are fine.  It takes a few days to get into the swing of it but then you think 'I could be a nurse'!


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## MummyBear10

First injection down, many more to go!!!!  
   that I respond xxx

Hope you guys are all ok?

xxx


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## scoobylooby

Hi Franny... it was all bar one... bar ha ha has gone from Brighton...but they had a deal on and it was good thanks.. Must admit, i wasn't in a very good mood though. I did a good job of putting my make-up on and looking like i was feeling back to normal, but i felt a bit awkward in the restaurant. To be expected. Let us know how your appt goes xx


Caa- wishing you all the best. When is your first scan?


Lou Lou-hope you are alright love. Thinking of you xx   


cheekycat1- i am a nurse and i hated giving myself injections! Far better to be sticking them in someone else i say! I had x2 goes with my eggs too... expensive but like you, felt it worth the try.


Love to all you gals xxx


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## MummyBear10

Scooby

I have my first scan on Wednesday. Feels very strange now that it is all happening. DH did our first at home injection this morning which he worryingly seemed to really enjoy! After he had done it he said "Whens the next one"  . Tomorrow he gets to do 3 so that will keep him happy!

How are you bearing up hun? any further forward with your frozen embies? xxx


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## frannyboo

Hi Scoobylou,
Sorry, think I got confused cos I was in Ha Ha t'other night.

Sorry you felt out of sorts tho it's not surprising.
On occasions it's all you can do to glam up and be present, you can't force yourself to be 'present' if you know what I mean.

Well done Caa on getting thru your first injections.
I've got my first appointment this afternoon; really nervous but hopefully will come away with answers.
Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Frannyboo

Good Luck hun! Will be thinking of you!
Let us know how you get on xxx


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## cheekycat1

Caa, yey you are underway with the injections!  I would blow you some bubbles or dust or whatever it is if I knew how!!!!!!


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## frannyboo

Ok, it's not good news. My AMH is basically 'undetectable' and donor eggs are the only way. Been put on waiting list.  Gutted but not shocked; all signs were there I suppose.
There's not much more to say I guess.
Love to all Xxxx


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## scoobylooby

Hi Franny- sorry it wasn't good news for you today hon. I can remember exactly how i felt when i was told the same news. Take time to let it sink in and then when you are ready ..get going with the donor IVF. I have found some people have zipped off almost straight away and done DIVF when they are told their own eggs are not very good. Other people take a bit of time to kind of grieve. I fell in to the latter category. If there is anything you think i can help you with just give me a shout... i am about to start another cycle...would you believe... long story!    sending you a big hug xx


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## MummyBear10

Franny, I am really sorry to hear that.   . xxxxxxx
I hope you take some time out this weekend to look after yourself and to come to terms with this news. When our clinic said they would not be able to continue with treatment I was devastated so I can only imagine how you must be feeling!
It is not going to be easy but try to hold on to the hope of DE options.
Here if you need support huni xxxx


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## cheekycat1

I'm so sorry Frannboo.  I hope you are OK.   I'm glad you've got straight on the Care waiting list.  I did the same a couple of days after I was told and it made me feel a bit better, like I was doing something proactive, and at least I know where I have to focus my energy rather than wasting my time on loads of cycles of IVF with my own.  Which location are you at and what sort of waiting list times will you have?  Manchester told me its about 7 months waiting list.


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## frannyboo

Thanks very much girls, you're all lovely and kind. Am sure it'll get better but at mo just feel like half a women to be honest... Xxx


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## roryroo

hi caa my ivf £10000 because im having chicago bloods and will be on highest dose of drugs and got to have pelvic tests etc decided to have everything as this is my last go.hope injections are going ok i refused to let my partner do it as the only time he did was the only time i got a bruise! iv been having a bad endo attack this week and am hoping to get it drained for the last time before i start last ivf take care


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## MummyBear10

Roryroo

Injections are going well so far thanks hun, Hubby is doing a fantastic job and no bruises as yet. Took first menapur injection last night (6 ampules) and I feel really really emotional today, like I could just cry all day. Not sure if it is the drugs, the worry of if I will respond or the fact that yet another friend has announced that she is pregnant after only 1 month of trying. I'm sure I will feel totally different again tomorrow and will be glad when I have had first scan on Wednesday and have a better idea of if my body is responding. I keep telling myself to take it one step at a time but sometimes my head runs in front and when I think of the negatives I get really scared.

When are you due to start treatment? £10000 is a lot of money but worth every single penny if it works xxxxxxx


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## LouLou28

Hey Ladies,

Sorry not been in contact, been trying to pick me and my DH up as unfortunately wasn't good news for us with our 2nd cycle and after seeing the consultant he has advised us to try donor eggs so now on waiting list as mine look like they have had it   really devastated obviously but really found it hard this time tx and bodywise and don't think could do another cycle with my eggs...

Caa - Good luck with your tx girl and now well on your way for that "special' egg hopefully, so much     to you and thinking of you will be keeping in touch to help if can anyway and waiting for that lovely BFP keep telling yourself as can happen  

Frannyboo - I can so relate to how you are feeling at the mo honey with not feeling like a full woman as in the same situation and totally feel that way and useless when like we all know and have everyone else just falling pregnant around us it sucks!!! and no quick resolution to help us but as I've been trying to tell myself we will have a family one day one way or another and should be living life for now not trying to wish it away to when this happens very easier said than done I know but one day hopefully we will all look back at these dark days and it will be a distance memory.... and our little ones will be around  
If need a rant or an ear please PM me as I'm here  

We have been told a waiting time of 3-4 months max which if true I think is not too bad as need my body to calm down again and also get used to the idea of DE as is a big thing but if gets us our little dream 100% worth it..

Thinking of all you and lots of  

xox


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## MummyBear10

First scan and bloods tomorrow and I am soooo nervous      let me be responding? I have had some twinges on left ovary side but not really any other side effects.

I don't think I will be sleeping much tonight


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## scoobylooby

best of luck caa...


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## frannyboo

Yes, best of luck Caa, keep us posted.

Thanks ladies for your support. Whilst I was gutted on Friday and over the weekend I am feeling more positive now.
What helps is that I try and see this as two separTe issues;
1) is to have a family we need to use donor eggs. Strangely I feel ok about not having a genetic link with any baby I'm fortunate enough to have. Think it might be because of my stepdad, who I'm really close to
2) I feel much more upset about the fact that I've failed to do the one thing that seems to come so easily to other women I know.

Does this make sense? Or am I officially loopy?! Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Hi Ladies

Just back from first scan and have 13 follicles so far. Some of which are really small but some which the nurse said are of a good size. Most are on my left ovary which surprised me as this is the one covered in endo. I feel relieved and think that this is a good show considering my AMH? Any feedback on this guys?

Franny - I'm glad you are feeling more positive. It is very hard when it comes so easily to other people - I have 3 best friends and 5 people at work who are pregnant at the minute and all but 2 have fallen pregnant within 1 month of trying. Its easy to think why me? which I do a lot!! but then I think well it is me and there is nothing I can do to change it. When we do have our children we will see them as a gift and not a right and will treasure them sooo much. I am really glad you are thinking positively about donor eggs, I know that this will be the next step for me if things don't work out with my treatment. To have a baby grow inside you and to provide it with all the love that you have is far more important than biology! There are a lot of biological parents out there who make terrible parents so the genetic link for me is so small in significance to the bigger picture.

Hope all other ladies are doing well xx


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## scoobylooby

Caa.. sounds very promising love. i reckon that is a good start. I think i had about 6-7 follicles pretty much all on one ovary and then got 3 eggs.. so let's keep fingers crossed there is more good news to come. I remember just thinking as far ahead as the next appointment and no further. That way, if you do well it is a bonus.. if that makes sense! Because i was told i would be a poor responder i never saw myself at egg collection! But i got there! When is your next scan? Sending lots of luck   


Franny- You are doing just fine hon. You might not think you have your head together... but you have! You have exactly the right approach to be a donor egg mum. I guess like me... you probably had researched it and started to think about it a while ago which helps. You have every right to be upset at not being able to conceive though. I saw a couple of teenagers pushing their prams today and thought "why not me?" It is hard and it is unfair and maybe there may always be a little bit of sadness inside about it... but i suspect once you have a baby. and you will one way or another... all those feelings will melt away. Good to see you back on the thread xx


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## MummyBear10

Scooby

My next scan is on Friday.

I am certainly taking it all one step at a time. I was so scared last night about today and I cried when the nurse told me that I was responding as I have become so used to bad news that I expect i nowt. It was lovely that it was a positive for me today which makes a big change. I am happy that I am one step closer to egg collection as this is a big mile stone for me because even if things dont work from there I will know that I have given it the best shot with my own eggs before moving on to donor.


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## MummyBear10

caa said:


> Hi Ladies
> 
> Just back from first scan and have 13 follicles so far. Some of which are really small but some which the nurse said are of a good size. Most are on my left ovary which surprised me as this is the one covered in endo. I feel relieved and think that this is a good show considering my AMH? Any feedback on this guys?
> 
> Franny - I'm glad you are feeling more positive. It is very hard when it comes so easily to other people - I have 3 best friends and 5 people at work who are pregnant at the minute and all but 2 have fallen pregnant within 1 month of trying. Its easy to think why me? which I do a lot!! but then I think well it is me and there is nothing I can do to change it. When we do have our children we will see them as a gift and not a right and will treasure them sooo much. I am really glad you are thinking positively about donor eggs, I know that this will be the next step for me if things don't work out with my treatment. To have a baby grow inside you and to provide it with all the love that you have is far more important than biology! There are a lot of biological parents out there who make terrible parents so the genetic link for me is so small in significance to the bigger picture.
> 
> Hope all other ladies are doing well xx


So I Just had phone call from clinic to say to reduce my Menapur to 4 ampules which I'm hoping is a good sign xxx


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## Chowy

caa

Just read your initial post, havent time to read all of others.  However, I have low AMH and Severe stage 3 Endo.  I have suffered for many years and only diagnosed when I was 30.  I have had 6 operations and other treatment.
However, if you look at my profile I have had a beautiful baby boy (now 21 mths, but still my baby) there is hope honey.  I was told my chances of having a baby were very slim as I have so much damage internally from the severity of my endo.  But my little man is living proof that it can happen.

Best of luck     
Chowy and her little Pup xx


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## frannyboo

Hi all,
Thought I'd check you back in and let you know that I'm still here!
Getting over last week's gutting news.
Trying to be philosophical but furious on occasions. Hopefully this will pass. Am buying inappropriate stuff to compensate!!!

Hope you're feeling ok Caa? Love to all Xxx
And Lou the offer's the other way too; if you need anything, pm me! Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Franny and Lou

Have been thinking of you both and sending you lots of     xxx


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## scoobylooby

Franny... what sort of inappropriate stuff have you been buying??I am intrigued!! leopard print skin tight jump suits? ... afro wigs? ... a llama?.... you will feel bloody angry for a while. I did for ages... but it is something you have to go through. I kept re-running events over in my mind... if only my Gp had referred me earlier.. if only the sperm test didn't take 5 months to get on the NHS... if only they had removed my endo on my first laparoscopy... blah blah.I don't think about any of that now though.. you just move on otherwise you go nuts! xx


Caa- i would say a reduction in drugs is a good sign hon... keep it up x


hope your weekends are ok... wherever you are.. wet down here in Brighton! Just finished work... Love to all xx


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## MummyBear10

This feels like the longest couple of weeks of my whole life!!!!! xxx


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## cheekycat1

Hey Caa, brill news so far for you. I am sending you   ! When do you find out more?
Sorry about your news Frannyboo, I know exactly how you feel.    Me, I've kind of not had chnace to dwell too much on the donor eggs issue as I've got to concentrate on the nasty op I'm having shortly, but as I posted on another thread, I'll hoppefully feel better and be ready for those lovely donor eggs when I've had my 'spring clean'!


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## MummyBear10

Cheekycat1

I am just back from clinic and nurse said I have a good collection of follies (about 11 in total but 2 are too big (25+) so about 9 (17-18mm) and she thinks consultant will bring egg collection forward to Wednesday. I am so scared about egg quality now but trying to stay positive and feel lucky to have got this far.

When is your op hun?


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## cheekycat1

Caa, that is such brilliant news   Im sure they'll be good'uns 
I've got a hysteroscopy on Monday and the 'big one' is on March 16th.  So glad I didnt have to wait long.  Whilst it was a scary week the other week at least by my GP sending me to gynae ER I leaped up the waiting lists!


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## scoobylooby

Well done caa xxxx Keep us posted xxx


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## MummyBear10

So nurse has rang and I'm definitely having EC on Wednesday! Trigger shot at 9.30 tonight. Scary but exciting


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## scoobylooby

Oooh! How exciting! Take it all your stride love... and let me get over-excited....woop woop!


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## MummyBear10

Thanks Scooby

It means so much especially off you girls on this thread. Trigger shot has left me with a massive bruise and a dead leg! I am very nervous today but trying to keep the positive visualisation going! please let there be at least one good one to put back in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!       

I hope the rest of you guys are ok? xxxxx


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## frannyboo

Very excited for you Caa, keep positive!
I am still here ladies, just taking some 'downtime'. Sorry if it seems I've been a little quiet on the thread, still sending big love to my lovely girlies.

Btw got a £45 mani-pedi for £12 off groupon t'other day. Bargain, have also seen various massages and other nice things so as Scoobs suggested earlier might be worth getting stuck in? Hugs to all and thanks for being so thoughtful and positive, FBoo Xxx


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## MummyBear10

Thanks Franny

I have been thinking of you and sending you lots of


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## MummyBear10

6 eggs collected this morning!!!!!!! We are so so pleased and so thankful to have got this far. We are just keeping everything crossed now that they are strong and fertilise nicely overnight. Just off to bed with magazines for a couple of hours now so catch up later xx


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## Ceri.

Hello ladies  
I hope you are all well and finding your way around the site  
As this is the Introductions area, we try to discourage chat threads from starting, as there is a high turnover of newbies joining who need our help to search the site for advice and support. Once the mods have left relevant links, we like to encourage you to pop into other areas and make new friends in similar situations to yourselves 
It's nice that you all want to keep in touch, so please have a look in the chit chat areas, join in so you can stay in contact or if you are having treatment in the near future then look in the cycle buddies boards 
Chit chat is here ... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=393.0
and cycle buddies here ... http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=68.0
Dont forget that you can send pm's to each other by clicking on their name on the left hand side 
Take care and I wish you all louck and babydust xx


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