# NEW TODAY - EXTREME FSH *UPDATE - FSH now 4.4! *



## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

I've recently been told I'm postmenopausal/ POF at the age of 36 and it's come as a total blow.  I've not had periods for about 6 months but thought it was due to stress and so on so I wasn't too concerned.
I had a blood test recently and FSH came back as 123!!!  Seems to be the highest I've seen so figure there really isn't any hope for me, although I'm taking wheat grass/ agnus castus etc. in the hope of a miracle.

I went to see a "specialist" who didn't do any further tests but said the result was conclusive and I hadn't expected that.  Feel washed up and that I'd be too expensive to investigate on the NHS.  I also feel like there's nothing in life to look forward to.  I hadn't decided to have kids but not having a choice is so painful and I'd always thought I would one day.

Anyway, I don't know where to start or what to do but thought I'd post on here in search of support.........


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## barbaramary (Jan 30, 2006)

Hello and Welcome to FF 36POF

I'm so sorry to hear your news, being told you can't have your own genetic child takes a lot of coming to terms with.  There are a lot of women on here with your problem - as you will probably see there is a whole section devoted to Donor Eggs/Sperm.  We're also using Donor eggs after goes at IVF with my own didn't work.

I'm sure a moderator will be along soon to point you in the right direction of other useful threads

Come on here and talk as much as you need to  - it does help.  I think I'd have gone mad without FF over the years.


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## kas1872 (Jul 13, 2008)

hi i am so very sorry to hear your crushing news,,,, you and your partner must feel awful,,, just wanted to send u hugs and hope for the future,,, i am also new to this site, but i have already found it such a supportive site when you have problems,,,, i am sure there are people on here who will be able to help you,

love and best wishes for the future

karen
x


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Hello 36POF, welcome to Fertility Freinds. 

You do sound very lost and scared by your diagnosis and that's completely understandable.  Its a huge adjustment you are coming to terms with in your life and, perhaps, even grieving for the children you may never have. You are certainly NOT washed up so none of that defeatist talk - the NHS doesn't have any real provision for dealing with the more complicated cases where fertility treatment is concerned so I am guessing they have said this not because of expense but because they simply can't go anywhere with your issues. 

May I ask you if you have had you FSH tested more than once? Stress can play a part in raising FSH and you can get the odd dodgy result although, obviously your levels are extremely high and I imagine the specialist knows what they are talking about. Nevertheless it is definitely worth having a few repeat tests over several months to confirm the situation though. 
What I would also say is that, even with such a high level, there is still a possibility, albiet a small one, that you could get pregnant with your own eggs, although it would be through IVF and you simply don't know how you might respond until you try. I would definitely advise seeking a private consultation, maybe with a clinic who specialises in dealing with poor responders and ladies in your situation. It won't hurt you to do so and, at the very least, you will feel more comfortable with your prognosis if it has been confirmed. Meanwhile, it is still worth doing everything you can to boost your chances and to lower your levels. This link is really for ladies undergoing fertility treatment but there might be some hint and tips there that can help you too:

*What can improve egg quality and quantity ~ * CLICK HERE

And another one for complimentary therapies as some ladies have had success lowering FSH with acupuncture etc.

*Complimentary Therapies ~ *CLICK HERE 

You will certainly find some support with this on the POF boards we have here:

*POF / Early Menopause ~ * CLICK HERE

Please do post and start networking with the people who post there as I know they will be hugely supportive to you and can point you in the right direction of your next steps.

As others have mentioned, you may also want to look at the possibility of donor eggs. Althoguh the concept might be very hard to get your head around right now - and likely the pain of your diagnosis somewhat raw to consider this - it is one very efficient way in which ladies in your situation have found them selves successfull in getting pregnant. Obviously the idea of a donor egg is not easy to comprehend and, perhaps for some not a suitable approach but I have seen many reluctant members who have gone on to accept it is what they need and they have gone on to become mummies.

*Donor sperm/eggs ~ *CLICK HERE

The donor waiting lists in the UK are fairly long and, thus, a lot of people decide to have treatment abroad where eeggs are more readily available so you could, in theory, be having treatment inside 6 months if you took that option and, frankly, it doesn't really cost more than donor treatment in the UK, all things considered!

I am also going to leave you a few links to some other parts of the boards that you may find helpful. Do take a look and start posting / meeting people. FF is a wonderful place but you can only get the best support here if you join in:

*What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~ *   CLICK HERE

*Questions for your first cycle consultation ~ (use the ones that apply) *CLICK HERE

*Girl & Boy talk - Community & Fun Board ~ *CLICK HERE

You can also chat live in our excellent chat room. We have a newbie night in the chat room every week (*Wednesday at 8pm*), where you can meet other new members and get technical support with navigating the site and using all the functions available here.  CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT 

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. This is especially useful to find people who may be using the same clinic and or in the same PCT area.

I hope we hear from you again soon and I hope you can see some light at the end of the tunnel - you may have lost the battle but you can still win the war! 

Loads of luck. 

C~x


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## foxylady73 (May 11, 2008)

Hi 36POf and welcome   

Your story struck a chord with me and my heart goes out for the way you are feeling right now.

Whilst I'm sure the specialist knows what they are talking about, I would definitely ask for further tests to be done.  My FSH has been very high at times but has varied dramatically between tests.  It has also come down significantly following chinese medicine and acupuncture so please don't give up completely, our bodies can surprise us sometimes.  You are certainly not washed up and I know it feels like your options have been taken away from you but one test is not enough to determine where you go from here.

Wishing you lots and lots of luck in your journey.

Foxy x


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## Ocelot Cub (Mar 31, 2008)

Hi hon


I didnt want to read and run but am about to go out and DH will kill me if i say on here too long - please pm me if you need any more support/ have questions you need answered. Have a look at my signature - I am in a similar situation to you and understand all you are saying. I was only saying yesterday how this makes you feel like you have nothing to look forward to, but there is and we must find that again.

I have found this site amazing and there is also www.pofsupport.org (american and you need to register but there are some inspiring miracle stories with ladies with very very high fsh).

If you have been stressed you may be showing higher levels than normal and there are a lot of alternative therapies that help. The most important thing is to look after yourself and stay as calm as you possibly can - I know its not easy.   whatever route to motherhood you take in the future you will need all the strength you can get. I have made my priority since Jan being super healthy - then no matter what happens I will not have regrets.

Now I have been busted by DH - speak later xxxx



/links


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Hi Everyone,
Firstly, thanks for welcoming me to FF.  I'm still getting to grips with how it works and how to move around the board - there's so much on here!

I will definitely check the websites that have been mentioned.  I've looked at one already but there's a lot to take in, isn't there.

Not quite sure how I feel today as I think I'm in denial at the moment.  I had a session of acupuncture on Tuesday and have looked carefully at my diet to see if I can be healthier (But I'm slim so I'm trying hard to be careful not to lose any weight) and I began to have a period yesterday.  I'm not sure if this is totally normal and typical of POF after not having a period for months.  It's so strange as it made me feel good, although I'm trying to be realistic.
I don't know whether I should try to get back to the doctor tomorrow and suggest another blood test as it'll be day 3 of the cycle if it continues.

Anyway, thanks again for all the support.  I'm not sure what PM means (private message?).  I haven't used a forum before so I'm a bit slow.
Hope you're all OK


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Hi,
Oh, I'd hoped that having a period "meant" something.  I suppose we always live in hope, don't we.  OK< I'll keep my feet on the ground.
If you still have periods though does that mean you would be able to use your own eggs for treatment?  Sorry if your info says all this, I don't know what some abbreviations means (like DH, etc.).

For now I'm just trying to enjoy the sun and suppose I'm still hoping for a miracle.  It'd be great to go to the doctor armed with you guys as I'd be sure I got all the info. then!  
I was thinking I'd try to see him tomorrow and ask for another test...it doesn't help having a bit of a phobia about going to the doctors.


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Thanks Lexey,
I go back on August so not much longer to wait.  We all just want to hear good things though, don't we.
To be honest, I'm hoping they at least investigate things a bit further.  My doc said I'd have tests at the first hospital but they didn't do anything except ask why I was there and when I said they just replied with "you've had all the tests you need.  It's conclusive".
I was totally unprepared for that!

Anyway, I'm now wondering whether they'll perhaps refer me to fertility/ Nurture (as I'm in Nottm).  I really want to find out the criterif for fertility treatment but think I'll have to pay as my partner has two children from a previous relationship (she left to be with someone else).
Just seems another burden on top of POF.

Thanks for keeping in touch.  Hope you're feeling OK.  x


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Hi,
Some time ago I posted seeking advice on whether there was any hope of "recovery" after a 123 FSH count.  I've changed my diet and been having acupuncture and have had 3 bleeds in the last couple of months.  They stopped for about 5 months.

Anyway, on my last blood test the FSH was 4.4 and the consultant had advised me that a normal reading didn't necessarily mean anything (in fact he said it didn't at all).

What I'm wondering is, has anyone else with POF had a similar experience?  I try to be positive, but also realistic but I'm feeling down at the moment, especially as my most recent period only lasted 3 days so I see this as a negative.

Thanks


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## sallywags (Jun 27, 2005)

wow hun - i know fsh can fluctuate, but that is a serious fluctuation!  I bet it is down to all the hard work you have put in..

I have never had fsh that high, but i just wanted to wish you luck.


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## ❣Audrey (Aug 22, 2008)

I don't have any advice but I just wanted to say that I will be thinking of you xxx


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Thanks for the replies and warm wishes.
I guess we're all hoping for a miracle aren't we...
Sending you all   in our search for a miracle x


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## Ocelot Cub (Mar 31, 2008)

Hi love - CONGRATULATIONS!!! 

I know what the drs say about the worst fsh being the most likely indicator and all that (same said to me) but I really do think that as long as your FSH is fluctuating (and that dramatically) you are in with a shot. Now it may be that last month you didnt ovualate (little estrogen = thinner lining = lighter period) but surely this low fsh is an indicator that your ovaries are having a good month - could be a good egg in there!!?? Did you try BMS at ovulation time? Are you using a clearblue fertility monitor? I am and am hoping for that elusive egg (which I have to say i believe 100% is still in there waiting to make me VERY happy!) 

I think for you and I we are not fully POF although we may well find that we reach menopause earlier than our peers, keep up the good work and remember when times are tough that despite what consultants say there is loads that they dont know about fertility, the good consultants will say that themselves, it is all very mysterious. I have seen ladies on pofsupport.org (in states) who have concieved after very high fsh and NO periods at all!! 

May I ask - are you taking DHEA?

Have a look back over my posts - my situation is very similar to yours - very high fsh, 35 years old, and trying not to be beaten by POF, still hoping for a miracle of the natural kind before I go down the other avenues x Please stay in touch I would love to hear how you are doing x


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Wow that's an amazing difference! Well done on all the hard work you have put in to bring it down. 

I think doctors are trained to err on the side of pessimism but, the fact it has come down, the fact you are having periods again must mean something. Will you be having repeat tests over the next few months to check too? It would be lovely and very inspirational to see the improvment is a long standing one not just a one off - maybe your doctors will be more optimistic then and, more importantly, maybe you will get your longed for BFP! 

For what it's worth the length of your period is pretty immaterial - mine only last 3 (albiet fairly heavy) days and you might even find with continued support from the diet and acupucture etc. you will see improvements there too. 

Keep up the fab work and keep letting us know how it's going!   

C~x


P.S. just a thought but have you had an AMH test at all?


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Thanks for the encouragement.  I really need it this week.  Just keep hearing the consultant's words in my ears!

I'm rushing as I'm about to go out (trying to keep exercising) soon so this is a little hasty.

I've not had any treatment at all yet.  The first doctor I saw wanted to medicate me there (blood test June, saw her in July) and then but I was in ultra shock mode and hadn't expected her to be so blase about POF etc.  It all happened very quickly and was (still is) an emotional roller-coaster.  The only days that are good are those when I'm distracted/busy/in denial.

In brief - I've changed my diet after reeading the Julia Indichova book, "Inconceivable".  I needed something and it is very good to read.
No wheat, no alcohol, very little diary, yoga, taking wheatgrass (although she admits she doesn't view that as a cure).
I take Evening Primrose oil, agnus castus, calcium tables and drink mineral water.  I never used to as I loved coffee but no longer have any caffeine.  Well, that's a fib - my treat is a green tea (diluted, i.e. make a cup then use bag in another cup to reduce caffeine) every now and then.
Nearly all organic food and no additives etc - fresh, fresh, fresh.
Eating healthily and trying to put some weight on as I'm very slim (and it is so annoying when people go on about how skinny/slim I am.  Especially when you just want to feel normal and everyone else struggles to keep weight down).

I have a bone scan at the end of the month - keeping fingers crossed
See the consultant again in November (on my flipping birthday!)

I feel confused about options with medication to be honest so I'm hoping that in the meantime I keep ovulation and the egg quality improves............miracle of miracles.

Think that's it - I don't keep records of temperatures or anything.  What with everything else I'm paranoid about at the moment I've tried to limit things.  Don't seem to have enough time in the day to exercise, eat really healthily, work and have a life - well, not that I do much now my diet's limited and alcohol-free!

Thanks again for your messages.  Sorry - wrote more than I thought.
Hope it's of use.


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

For what it's worth, if you intend to keep ttc naturally then I think it make sense to ditch the temp charts / ovulation tests and just try and have sex about 3 times a week. There's a lot of evidence to suggest it's just as effective.

The AMH test I mentioned is Anti Mullierain Hormone (sp) which is supposedly better indication of egg reserve than FSH test so worth asking about - not sure if you can get it done on NHS though but if you don't ask you won't get!
Keep up all the great work and,  when you go back in NOvember you will still have a lowe FSH and your cons might feel confident enough to look at treatment options for you.

C~x


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

I need some words of encouragement here.  It seems like everything around me is crumbling what with POF and now the difficulties with my boyfriend.
Obviously i've had a lot to deal with but he now says he's really depressed and I think he is but I'm not sure if he wants rid of me and is down because he doesn't know how to cope with that.

We haven't seen each other for over two weeks now and I thought he needed time out so left him to it.  He got in touch this week to wish me well but then said it's his depression that's making him not know what to do for the ebst etc.  He still loves me and always will.
My head is a mess.

We're meeting for coffee (well, mine's a water/green tea) tomorrow but I sense it's going to be tough.  he's always said he'd want to stay friends even if we split up but I couldn't handle that i don't think.

Has anyone else been through this?  I'm trying to keep stress levels down and focus on being positive but it's not really happening at the moment so then I worry about POF and the scans I have coming up etc.

Thanks for listening x


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Thanks a lot.
I know it's so hard to deal with these things - POF is enough, never mind the other stuff.

I'm so sorry to learn your news and appreciate you must be down.  I wish I knew what to say to take the pain away.  People say we'll reach a time when we can deal with these things, but the pain in between is a real test.

I wish you all the luck, and peace, in the world.  
 xx


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## Ocelot Cub (Mar 31, 2008)

Hi 36POF

I am so so sorry that you are going through this hon, this whole IF thing is tough and the POF thing is tougher still. All of this has such an effect on us, I personally have felt at times that I don't know who I am anymore, seem to have lost my self confidence etc but then I pick myself up and focus on the prize again. This also has a massive effect on our partners too and it is so hard to try and help them come to terms with stuff when we feel so utterly devastated ourselves. I have suffered from depression as a result of the diagnosis, not too serious thankfully and I think that Ben has had some very tough moments too. When Ben has found it hard I have felt angry with him and we have rowed a lot about nothing and everything, at times I have wondered if we would make it through, but with a lot of understanding on both sides and a bit of counselling we have really turned a corner, it has taken time though, I was told about the POF in January and we are just about seeing eye to eye!!! There is still loads to talk about but for now we are just taking it day by day trying not to rush each other into discussing things that we find traumatic or difficult. For example Ben will not talk about ED at all, I am not ready to do it at all but would like to discuss it, I have had to accept that Ben is not ready for that amongst other subjects. I am so sorry I am rambling but I didn't get much sleep last night, but I guess what I am saying is that as tough as it is this is not unique, we have all had moments where we thought that we would split before we got anywhere but through talking and understanding one another we can pull through x I would really recommend a bit of counselling (pref together but failing that you could do it alone - it really helps take the pressure off the relationship and work through some of the phscological damage we feel). I am sure your fella is just finding it hard to communicate his feelings, I felt like mine wanted to get shot of me at times but a lot of that was my own insecurities.

As the others say - we are here for you - and you are doing so so well with your healthy regime and getting your FSH down to 4 is AMAZING!!!

Good luck tomorrow hon - we are here when you need to chat again x

​


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

36POF, oh hun 

Men do tend to deal with this whole IF thing differently to us anyway. Also you find infertility adds a whole new level of strain to a relationship. I won't comment on whether he's making excuses or not and really wants to be with you because, I honestly think you probably know deep down whether he does. I actually wanted to give you a link to our Realtionships boards where I think you could post and get some really good and helpful advice from others on here but, it's restricted access and you need a minimum number of posts (this is simply to protect our members from anyone unscrupulous as some fo the topics are very sensitive in nature.) It's a very supportive area and would be ideal place the thrash this out but, I don't think you have enough posts to see it just yet. 

I guess if you think he might not want to be with you anymore you could give him an amnesty - i.e. ask him outrigth and make it clear there'll be no hard feelings or repercussions if he admits it now. 
If he is really depressed I think you need to encourage him to see his GP to get help and also to think about relationship counselling... even if you go alone just you (it will help you clear your head on what *you* want) or he goes on his own or you both go individually or together... it will all help. If he loves you, as he says and really does want to make a future with you then, surely, he would be open to this suggestion. 
No matter what I think you do need to make it very clear to him that you won't be messed about while he makes up his mind what he wants, depression or no, and you also need to make it clear to him where you'd want your relationship to go with regards to your hopes of having a baby. If he doesnt want to have a baby with you and that's a deal-breaker for you then he needs to know that.
Yes, you _can_ be friends with your ex but it's rare to fins a situation where it works out - (I am very good friends with one of mine but it's a pretty unique circumstance I hasten to add!) If you do agree to "stay friends" there's always the worry that it's just another way for him to put you in the keep net for as and when he needs a bit of female companionship. Do you think he would do that? Do you want to be in that type of relationship? I'm sad to say I have been there done that too and it just makes you feel cheap and used which is, actually, exactly what you are. 

Anyway,  with your chat tomorrow. 

C~x


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## Ocelot Cub (Mar 31, 2008)

Just wanted to pop in to say I was thinking of you   hope you managed to make some progress at the weekend x


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## 36POF (Jul 18, 2008)

Hi All,
Thanks so much for the messages.  I haven't been able to get online for  a while.

In brief - my boyfriend and I have made up.  Well, I say that, it's a long road to travel but we've certainly begun talking more.
I've had my first counselling session and it was good to talk and cry.  I felt drained afterwards but I have a few more sessions booked in.  I considered going in with him, as he drove me there, but I didn't know what was best and had assumed it'd only be for me so I was surprised when the counsellor inidicated he could come in.
I think it'd be good to work through a few of my issues first.  He has his but isn't yet at the point of being able to really analyse things.  It was such a relief to at least see the door open a little though.
So, the hard work is still ahead but...

I had a scan today for bone density and that went Ok - so that's some good news.

I'm just praying for another period now - knowing that there's no chance of a miracle this month due to relationship issues but as long as my body is working I'll be positive and happy.

Fingers crossed !


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## Ocelot Cub (Mar 31, 2008)

So pleased that you are making progress - you really are heading in the right direction as hard as it is you will make it through. I am sure you will get your P - I am on CD44 and finally I have the vaguest ache so hopefully   Great news on the counselling - good for you to have some space for yourself for the moment - and if you are anythign like me I think it has helped how me and Ben communicate even though he is not there.

Great news on the bone scan - I had the same but was so scared about it in the run up!! 

Good luck x


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Hey! 

 for you. Seems like you're making some prigress personally and good to see the conselling is helping. 
 for normality for your cycles this month and beyond. 

C~x


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