# son hitting himself....



## wilcock (Oct 6, 2011)

Hello we adoted r ds in november 2010,but the last couple of days he has been hitting the side of his head when my husband or i have shouted at him or told him not to doit,it is really upsetting to see,he is only 23months...wondering if he is just doing it for attension or if its stems from bm.


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## elmoeleven (Jul 14, 2007)

is he hitting himself because you are shouting at him not to do something and this then is the result of you telling him off or does he start hitting himself and then you tell him off for hitting himself?

it must be really upsetting to see and it is really important to get some proper advice because you need to identify the cause of the problem, it could be physical, could he have an ear infection?. it may be that you need some advice from CAMS.

elmo
xxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## crusoe (Jun 3, 2005)

Hi Wilcock
My Ds used to do this a bit when he thought  he had done something wrong. It started with maybe hitting the table if he bumped into it. He grew out of that and would then hit himself if he bumped something or as I say if we appeared cross with him. 
My Ds was probably a similiar age to yours when he did and now at just turned 4 he has grown out of it completely and I can't remember at all the last time he did it.
I would just stay calm, don't give it any attention (unless you really think he is hurting himself) and over time you will be able to give him better strategies for coping with his upset or anger. Development in his speech and language skills as he gets older will aid this.
I think hitting themselves is a phase some children - adopted or not go through. I'm sure it will disappear as quickly as it started.

Love Crusoe
x


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## L-J (Sep 17, 2007)

Hi,


I hope you don't mind me jumping in on this thread, as my DD isn't adopted, but the situation of her hitting her head is very familiar to me!  She started doing it when she was around 20 months, and it was really when her 'terrible two' tantrums started.  So, if she was throwing a bit of a hissy fit, or not getting what she wanted, and especially if she was in her car seat and didn't want to be, she would ht herself, or pinch herself.  She would also hit me.


I found this very worrying, but it seems that it is a fairly common stage that some children go through.  She is 28 months now, and still does it occasionally, but no where near as often.  I usually just ignore it, as when I used to ask her to stop, she would do it all the more.  if she hits me or anyone else, it is time out straight away, though.


I understand that this behavior may be of extra concern in some adoptive cases, but I just wanted to tell you that it can happen in all situations, and that hopefully your LO is just entering the 'terrible twos'........  it is very distressing, though.  Obviously, the early history of your LO may well make this behavior of extra concern to you..... so if you feel it isn't as I have described, then get it checked out.


Hope you don't mind me commenting......


L-J


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