# Letting go and holding on



## jq (Nov 14, 2006)

Hi,

Once I was a frequent participant on this board and I got so much from being involved. Friends I made here really helped me to "move on" and to be honest it gave me a sense of worth to hear I had been of some help to others.

I still visit -way past the end of the time when I sorely needed support and now I post/reply very rarely. I have "moved on" from the raw pain of facing life without having children but still feel both a connection and care for people on the same journey my life has taken. In one way I would like to reply to every new post, but I am in a different place now and feel that usually I can offer nothing new or more than is given by people who are in a similar point in the journey.

I want to say a big thank you to all the people who supported me so well (most of whom are no longer posting) and to encourage the people I never "met" to both give and take support here. 

I hope current members will feel OK if I sometimes join in!

Lots of love,

Jq xxx


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## Bambam (Feb 14, 2008)

Hi Girls  

Just to let you know I have removed a post from this thread as it was inappropriate. I hope you all understand  

Amanda xx


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## Bambam (Feb 14, 2008)

Hi Jq

Whilst the board is primarily to help people who are trying to accept and move on I think that it is inspirational to hear from people like you who have 'come out of the other side' and are now leading happy lives.

For a while i felt like i no longer fitted anywhere on FF as i'd reached the end of my journey so decided to 'leave', but when i said good bye to the friends i'd made on here they all made me realise that whilst my journey was over i had helped many of them and could continue helping others so i stayed. 

Having read many of your previous posts you were a tremendous help and support to our ladies and you certainly still can be.  I personally would love to see you continuing to join in and offering your invaluable advice and support    

Amanda xx


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## jq (Nov 14, 2006)

Hi Amanda,

Thank you for your kind message.

It is intriguing to see that we are receiving some inappropriate posts! I know you can't say what the one in reply to mine was, but I guess it was someone saying "Don't give up hope!" 

For people trying to move on my message is that while it may be that we do need to let go of the hope of having a birth child, we should know that it is still worth hoping and working for other good and happy things from life. 

Jq xxx


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## Pol (Mar 9, 2007)

Hello

I just wanted to say 'thank you' for being around on this board. You have been a tremendous help to me in balancing out the input / views / advice on here - this board would never function if it were only made up of people in the 'first crisis' of 'oh my god, I've reached the end of all possible options'.  You're an inspiration in demonstrating that moving on isn't about 'giving up hope' it's more about learning to hope for different things.

So thank you, and I also am very sorry if you really do want to leave off posting.

Jx


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## Myownangel (Aug 24, 2005)

Don't go away jq!!! You have been and are a great inspiration to me and others. When I came here I needed to hear from people who had made it through this loss and pain. I needed to know it was possible. And speaking for myself, I feel that I'm getting stronger day by day but I am aware I may have set backs as may you - so you always have a place here where we can support you. It's the least we can do.
Bernie xxx


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## jq (Nov 14, 2006)

Hi Bernie,

So good to hear from you! You are one of the people who has made my visits here so special and the name Grace is one I will always treasure as meaningfull to me.

It is really kind of people to say I have offered the support to them I received in turn. It is good to see that newer members are offering that support to one another. I will indeed visit here from time to time, but I know I will not be around so much. 

Meanwhile, I would dearly like to keep in touch with the people like you with whom I once regularly exchanged posts. If you would like to, please PM me and we can exchange email addresses. 

I hope things are going really well for you, I often think of you,

Love Jq xxx


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