# Babies Babies Babies arrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh



## Fertilityhawk (Jan 22, 2015)

Hello ladies

I'm feeling very low right now.  We've got a mini baby boom in the family and I'm finding it difficult to cope with.

Firstly my cousin's daughter (that's right cousin's daughter) has just had her 2nd baby, she is 21!  But what has killed me is that I've just been sent a picture of the new baby with my Grandad, who I absolutely adore.  The caption read "Oldest and Youngest members of our family"      My granddad is 94 and his health is flagging so I'm scared to death that he'll never see a great grandchild from me.  I'm the only one of his grandchildren that hasn't got children, so seeing him with his new great great granddaughter is just killing me     

Secondly we're going over to see my sister in law on Sunday to see our newborn niece, and whilst I'm looking forward to it I'm so scared of my reaction.  I'm scared that i'll not keep it together and i'll end up blubbing.

Our whole IVF journey has come to a screaming halt since a routine scan found out that some of my major organs are on the wrong side, ie liver & spleen so I'm now undergoing a battery of tests to see if my heart is in the right place and healthy etc.

Why on earth is this journey so bloomin hard.

I'm so sorry to vent just having a bad day.


----------



## MadameG (Jan 13, 2012)

Didn't want to read and run, sending a mahoosive hug   xxxxxx


----------



## sandyman (Dec 2, 2014)

Oh it is sucky being infertile isn't it?! Its like desperately trying to diet, and everyone shoves cakes and crisps in your faces! Why is it, that just as you start to think you are coping, everyone around you has babies or falls pregnant (normally after a long long struggle of three months trying...)
Don't be sorry for the rant, we love ranting and we love reading others rants- makes us feel normal and less guilty for having our own rants! 

Just remember how strong we are, and eventually we WILL get what we want... One day...
Sending lots of hugs to you!


----------



## Ms G (Aug 4, 2014)

Steph, it's all so unfair.  

Just to share my experience. You're not alone feeling like this. My closest friend just had a baby after one month of trying...one month!   She asked me to be godmother to her little boy. It took me a few weeks before I was up to it. She does know about our IVF and miscarriage. When I did see them, he was five weeks and the good news is that it wasn't as bad as I expected. I was scared for exactly the same reasons and thought I might fall apart. But, you will surprise yourself and you will be ok. Doesn't mean I didn't come home and have a good cry though. On the morning of the visit I went out and bought presents and flowers etc. Somehow that prepared me and made me feel stronger. 

Good luck lovely. xx


----------

