# Broken relationships - what to do with embryos



## sramos (Nov 28, 2012)

Hi - This time last year unexpectedly I was told that my AMH levels were virtually non-existent and needed to consider fertility treatment immediately to try and see what could be saved. It was all a shock but they gave my partner and I a chance and in april we succeeded in freezing 2 embryos for our future. We were going to have a break over the summer and try another round about now as we had beat all the odds. Then my partner dropped a bombshell in July, he no longer felt the same about me and wanted out. Now I have to start again from scratch and still need to deal with the embryos we created.

I would be very interested to hear from people who have gone through broken relationships because of IVF or have subsequently broken up after the freezing has occurred. I dont seem to see alot out there on it, I guess people dont want to speak about theses kind of difficult times but hopefully I can help at least open that door to make it ok


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## pollita (Feb 23, 2011)

I'm so sorry to hear of what you're going through. I don't have any experience but I didn't want to read and run! Fingers crossed you will get something worked out. Has your ex-partner said that he doesn't want you to be able to use the frozen embryos?


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## Caz.s (Jun 27, 2008)

Hi scramos

I split with my ex nearly three years ago and we had a frozen embryo left after our last tx. We split up not long after our tx and I believe fertility tx had a big factor in the breakdown. 

I knew that I had to decide what to do with the embryo but it was so tough. I phoned up my clinic and asked for the forms to be sent to me to destroy it. This broke my heart. The forms came through and I got as far as filling in all the details apart from the actual signature. My ex also had to sign the form and to cut a long story short neither of us could bring ourselves to do it. 

The forms are still with me and the idea of signing them is terrifying. I feel like I am signing away my last chance but I know that I will never use it. I have kinda decided in my head that I am just going to leave it and the clinic will destroy them when the time is up. Destroy is such a strong word and its a horrid thought of my little embryo being destroyed. 

Are you still on good terms with your ex and can you speak with him about this. I wish you all the best caz xxx


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## hidehi (Jul 29, 2011)

Hi Sramos

I'm also in a similar situation- my H left me in July too- 5 days before our egg collection. we did complete the IVF and had 5 embryo's frozen. We are not getting back together. I would not use the embryo's alone- even if soon to be ex-h did consent. 

however as caz said the thought of actually destroying them is too much to bear. I think I would just contact the clinic and ask them to do it as and when their time runs out.  

very sad times. but no hurry to do anything yet- time does heal- and if nothing else can make decisions easier so perhaps in the future you might feel stronger to work out what to do for the best

h x


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## Mum of 1 at last! (Jun 20, 2011)

I had no choice...............we had one embryo left and it was coming to the end of the storage period, dh wouldnt sign the consent forms to let me use it even though I told him I had no intention of chasing him for any money............in the end the clinic defrosted it and let it die..................


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