# Advise needed - when should we start first DIUI?



## mg2 (Nov 11, 2012)

Hi everyone - can't sleep thinking of what we should do...I thought I'd post on here and see what you lovely people thought as me and DP want to keep this to our selves for now so are short of opinions.

We went to the Centre For Life yesterday for our first appointment and had a scan and discussion with the fabulous team. The up shot was that we can get going as soon as we want. The sperm from European Sperm Bank will take about 2-4 weeks to arrive and we can get going straight away. This came as quite a surprise to me and DP as we thought the process would take much longer. We had originally planned to start treatment in September but now we are wondering if we should just get started now?! The problem is my DP is away for 2 months June-August and if we were successful before she goes away she would potentially miss the 12 week and 20 week scans. 

There are lots more of other factors in the decision but they would take a long time to explain and this one seems to be the most important one for us. (We would also be financially better off if we waited.) 

Does anyone have any suggestions/advise/experience in this area? What should we do? Start trying and just be happy if it happens or wait and make sure DP doesn't miss any of the pregnancy? Hope you can help! Will try to get to sleep now!


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

That is a tricky one. I see you are both young, do you have known fertility problems? If not, your chances are probably quite good so it could be successful sooner than you think. Do you have the patience to wait? I know I wouldn't have when we were TTC! 

Scans are such wonderful experiences (as long as all is ok of course) & I can't imagine DW not being there when we had ours. I think if you can, wait. The emotions of tx are crazier than I realised & neither of you know how you will react. Best of luck xxx


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## mg2 (Nov 11, 2012)

Hey thanks so much for your reply. No known problems and the scan showed that I am all good so far. She had a look at my womb and follicles etc and said that it was clear that I had recently ovulated and that everything looked normal. It is so hard to wait isn't it! We have been married for 4 years and together 7 and we have been broody for a lot of those years! 

We have worked out that my DW will only be away for 7 weeks so would only miss one scan not both and she would be there for the first early scan. It's a hard one isn't it as we never imagined being without each other at a scan or any part of the process.

Another thing to consider is that DP has two months off next summer so could look after the little one while I returned to part time work (if we did go for it earlier and were successful). If we didn't go for it she would have two months off anyway and not a lot to do!

I feel slightly ridiculous making this seem like a big deal when I should be happy that everything is ok so far and I am so aware that people on here have far more difficult decisions to make - but I appreciate your advice so much thank you!


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## single.mummy (Mar 12, 2009)

Hi
Only you can decide whether you would be happy if she were to miss out on a scan. But also you need to consider if you did not fall pregnant immediately, whether you would continue treatment whilst she was away (it can be emotionally very tough getting BFNs). You have to also consider if you were unfortunate to have any complications early on in the pregnancy whether you would prefer her close to support you. I was fortunate that my pregnancies were mainly trouble free however in 2 of my pregnancies I did have some bleeding early on and it was very scary and as we had not yet told family (pre 12 week scan) my DP was the only one who I could talk to about it.
However, these are worse case scenarios and I wish you and your DP all the best. I love think about people starting TTC as we are all done now and it was such an exciting time


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## Monkey07 (Jul 8, 2012)

Hi  

After 2 years of discussions, we started with GP tests and using OPK's in in June '12, i turned 26 in July '12 and we had our first appointment at LWC in Sept '12 where i had a good scan and we got the go ahead... I fell pregnant on our first attempt in October '12. Neither of us expected it to work first time but we were/are elated. So given your age and similar scenario to me/us i'd say that you sound in a great position so you probably would be ok to wait another 8/9 months...

If you did decide to go ahead now, I would echo what 2mummies said in that I have been admitted to hospital twice already due to potential ectopic (thankfully wasn't) and dehydration due to sickness. I have also had two UTI's already which caused a small amount of spotting both times. Due to all of the above I had three scans before 12weeks. I would never have got through those scans, especially the first one, without having my partner there to hold my hand/dry my neurotic tears... and despite having those previous scans the 12week scan really is the first chance to see your baby properly as its more detailed!

Only you two, as a couple, can decide and I wish you all the luck in the world that you get your BFP when you go ahead  xx


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## BecsW (Jun 14, 2009)

Hi,
It must be your decision of course but if it were up to me I would wait, you are young with no known fertility problems so it could well happen first time (it did for Monkey   ) and I would agree with the others, the scans are so precious that you will both want to be there for them,
Becs x


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## mg2 (Nov 11, 2012)

Thanks so much for the advice might be able to work out happy medium where DW will be there for both scans - will keep you posted with what we decide! X


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## mg2 (Nov 11, 2012)

Oh and amazing monkey that it worked out so well for you, congratulations and good luck!


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