# Really need advice



## aloha-kym (Apr 28, 2009)

Hi ladies, I had a whole post typed out but lost it??
anyway, I am new here my name is Kym, I live in Europe.
I am 44 my dh is 41..we just had 2 failed IVF'S, both of which produced 9 eggs..On the first attempt, we only had two to make it to transfer, one was ok and the other was good , those were day 3 transfers..
The second attempt , we had 3 make it to transfer , 2 were very good and 1 was excellent, per the embryologist and RE..we transfered those 3 on day 5..still a BFN. My AMH is 2.5 and my fsh is 7.5 my RE's and dh seem to think that my eggs are ok..I have regular normal periods (so far) LOL

I have 1 attempt left through my insurance,of which I pay half of..then I have to go to another country and pay all..either way its about 1,600 to 2,000 which is pretty good I guess..
My dh was married before and his ex could'nt get pregnant, she never had to use bc in any of her relationships..my dh marries me and I cant stay pregnant..I have had 2 mc's and 2 chemical pregnancies..my dh has had several SA'S both with the ex and with me and they are always super..

I would love to have a child and give my dh a baby which he really wants but I am getting tired of living my life for ttcing.. so I am thinking my next attempt will be my last, depending on how much my dh twist my arm, LOL

So should I stay where I am and do the next IVF, they do not do PGD or ED here..or should I just go to Czech for my next round and do either ED or use my own with PGD..it will cost me about the same..
My dh is open to ED but want to try with my own..in the end though he will do whatever I want but he would prefer it to be bio mine..
any advice or thoughts would be great..
HUgs
Kym


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## s1165 (Jan 2, 2009)

HI 

Have you had immune testing done. I havnet (yet) but lots of people on here who have - see Poor Responders thread. You may need some help to keep the pg.

Good luck
Sally


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## aloha-kym (Apr 28, 2009)

thanks sally, will look that up..


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Based on my own experience I'd definitely recommend looking into PGD... 

The 'quality' of your eggs/embryos is currently being assessed on how they look from the outside, but there's no way of knowing if they are internally OK - and I have a feeling chromosomal problems are the biggest cause of m/c in older women 

I had 4 cycles with my own eggs, always produced a good number, always had 2 grade 1's to transfer, 3 BFNs, and 1 miscarriage at 7-8 weeks...had PGD on last cycle and didn't get to transfer as all embies severely chromosomally abnormal. 

So at least now I know it's an egg issue with me, onwards with donor eggs
Was an expensive way to find out, but I think I needed it to get closure and to be able to move to DE knowing I'd done everything I could to get pg with own eggs

Good luck whatever you decide,
Suitcase
x


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## s1165 (Jan 2, 2009)

Hi

That is interesting Suitcase, thanks for sharing your thoughts and good luck with your journey. I see you have raised NK Cells and have had treatment for that but still no luck as egg quality as we know does decrease - I am 4 years older than you!! What I wonder is how important immune treatment is as so few people actually have it tested. What I am trying to say is maybe half the world has raised NK cells etc.. but never finds out and has no problem getting pg but a minority do. So they have treatment and looks to me like it works for some and not others and egg quality is still the most important thing.

I am wondering whether to have immune tests as I have no idea whether I have problem or whether my problems all down to egg quality. What I am worried about is at my ancient age cant keep having m/c etcc and not know why, But if I do find I have problems then no guarantee anyway and maybe spending fortune and stll not getting anywhere. 

I also wonder if immune probs can increase with age and also with repeated pgs, ie
my first pg went to 8 weeks and next t0 4.5 weeks!

I think  will have done what I can on NHS and see if problem as if I decide to go for DE It would be helpful if I knew. 

Sorry for waffling and I would be interested to know if what I said makes sense.

x


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## suitcase of dreams (Oct 7, 2007)

Yes, I know what you mean - some women do get pg for the first time with immune tx, but then again you never know if it was just their time/that was the time they got the 'good' egg....very little good evidence on this unfortunately, and the whole area of fertility tx is so grey....looking for black and white answers is impossible. Sometimes I think I should just ignore all the stats and trust to luck or fate or whatever you want to call it

That said, the PGD was pretty conclusive for me. And although the consultants said they wouldn't rule out me getting a good embyro in the future, the chances were very low - less than 5%. And for me that was definitive enough to tell me it was time to go for donor eggs. 

But of course other people have PGD, get good embryos, and still get BFN, or miscarry - so I know it's not the answer for everyone

If you've had recurrent miscarriages you should be able to get at least the basic tests on the NHS, so perhaps that's a good place to start and go from there?

Best of luck, 
Suitcase
x


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