# I have found this forum!



## MummyPhinie (Oct 27, 2013)

Hi everyone!
I found this forum last week, I regularly post on the other adoption forum, I didn't know this one existed!  

I find it hugely reassuring reading back through posts. Some days I feel like I'm going crazy or about to crack and others I'm feel I'm doing great. I sometimes can't believe I'm actually a mummy! I also don't think I'm old enough to be responsible for 3 little ones (don't think my first school run helped!).

How do any of you stay calm? The one thing I'm worried about is I always seem to be raising my voice or telling someone off. Most of time it's because they are in imminent danger or they are hurting each other and behaviour is unacceptable   having said that they are still very affectionate, eating drinking well and appear happy, it just feels like a constant battle, I guess that's normal?


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## Jo09 (Oct 12, 2009)

Hi phinie 

I could have posted that   

I've started trying to count to ten before responding to behaviour that really pushes my buttons. if Ive shouted once in the day I feel like the days been a failure, I think I thought I would be Mary Poppins  . counting to ten doesn't always work. But we're human and tired and all out of patience sometimes when youre caring for them 24\7   I think I read somewhere its OK to get cross as kids need to learn adults have limits to their patience too. But each day I go to bed I think i must do better tomorrow and be more calm and patient.

Good luck


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## AoC (Oct 28, 2008)

Hey Phinie.    It was a real eye opener for me to see how hard I found it to stay calm with Bug.  Still do, so no real tips from me, just keep trying and don't get stressed about being stressed!


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## Daddyboo (Paul) (Dec 24, 2012)

There are two things that have stayed with me that I repeat in my head when I'm about to explode (shout), LO hates me shouting so she knows it's serious when I do.

1. Don't sweat the small things
2. Praise the good, Ignore the bad - this is hard to do in the heat of the moment, but it has worked wonders with LO.

Saying that, when she's really winding me up (by repeatly saying "daddy" or "mummy") then I can't help but shout, I feel horrible afterwards but she does have to learn especially now that she's at school.

I don't know how anyone does it when you have more than one!


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