# worried mum of 30 year old daughter with possible POF



## fizzbuzz (Nov 28, 2013)

Hi. I'm new to this website and came across it by accident when looking online for info related to fertility problems. I'm hoping it will help me and my daughter at what I find to be a very difficult time in our lives 
I am 60 and went through the menopause in my mid 30s. I recently discussed this with my daughter who is not in a relationship at the moment but who wants children at some point in the future when she has met the right guy!
Having been in touch with a consultant at The Daisy Network we understand that there is a real risk that my daughter could also experience POF and also be at risk of a low ovarian reserve.
She has decided that she would like to have the various tests done (AMH,scans etc) to identify if the latter is the case and to also look at the possibility of egg freezing. We do know that there is no test to indicate whether she will experience POF or not.
Can anyone in the same position recommend a private clinic in London (she lives in Clapham and works in Streatham) where they have had a positive, caring and supportive experience. I get the feeling from some reviews that many of the clinics are extremely expensive and not particularly friendly or supportive. Obviously at the moment she is not going as far as having IVF but would still like somewhere that is going to be understanding and not just money grabbing. Also a clinic that offers late afternoon/evening/weekend appointments if one exists!
Thank you for reading and I look forward to hearing from people


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Wow what a lovely and caring mum you are. 


I went to The Lister which is in Chelsea and thought they were a really good clinic, i then had to move on to a different clinic, but thats for a whole different set of reasons.


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## dillydolly (Mar 11, 2005)

I just wanted to say its really good to see a mum on here concerned about her daughter😄

I'd just say whatever happens and whatever route she takes support her all the way. Who knows what her future holds on the fertility front or finding mr right. If she has to take some non conventional routes either in the uk or abroad then support her😄

I haven't seen many, if any parents on here but I see lots of women going down various routes without their parents support or approval and I think that makes things really hard for them to achieve a family


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## livity k (May 19, 2009)

Hi, 
We've had treatment at CRGH off the Grays Inn Rd. it is expensive but the docs are v good and embryologists excellent. 
I live in Brixton and found although its not the nearest clinic it is easy to get to on the Victoria line as its 5 mins from kings cross. 
The appointments thing is harder as during stimulation you are usually monitored in the morning so they can assess results and make any changes to drugs that evening. You are monitored closely so it can mean daily appts for about a week. I liked the close monitoring though as it means they are on top of what's going on. 
Livity


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## happyhay (Sep 17, 2009)

I second CRGH every patient has an individual program to meet their needs so she will be in safe hands


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## Minky Moo (Mar 19, 2012)

I had a great experience at the Lister. They are incredibly supportive, very used to dealing with ladies with low AMH and get good results. Very easy to get to from Clapham


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

The one thing i would say personally is dont choose a clinic because its close or because the staff are nice.  I know that sounds odd but iv been to 3 different clinics and would say my first clinic was nearest by far and the staff were lovely.  But they were not at all pioneering.  Choose a clinic solely on the the fact that they are the best clinic for your needs.


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## Keeping busy (Apr 13, 2011)

I would 2nd what coweyes said, just because a clinic is close to home doesn't make it the bet clinic for you. It's really lovely that you are on here and thinking about your daughter. My mum is our number one supporter when it comes to ttc and I know I couldn't have done it without her xxxx


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## carrie lou (May 16, 2006)

I'm another Lister girl. The staff are brilliant, always make you feel like an individual, and I believe their success rates are very good too. I think they specialise in treating ladies with low AMH. So definitely worth a phone call at least. 


And can I add how lovely it is to see a supportive caring mum. If your daughter does end up having fertility treatment, she has an excellent supporter in you. Best of luck


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## yoga31 (Jul 8, 2012)

Hi Fizz 

sorry to read about you daughters diagnosis

I agree about the Daisy Network - they have been an fantastic source of information and support for me.

I think that it is important that she has a good POI/POF consultant who can support her medically through this diagnosis. POI can be tough on the body causing many symptoms (I'm sure you know all about that -  osteopenia, cardiac prob etc). HRT is v important. Having a healthy womb is part of the success of IVF treatment and if she can be refered to a hospital such as Queen Charlottes or Chesea and Westminster where there are specific POI clinics - she will be given the best starting point for her treatment (even if it is sometime away in the future) - They will also be able to advise on IVF clinics who are experienced in dealing with POI sufferers.

Her GP should be able to refer her.
Wishing you and your daughter the best


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Your never look back and say "o the staff were lovely" but you will look back and say "i went to the best clinic i could afford and regardless of the out come i/they did their best"  


Yes my mum is my greatest supporter as well.  Shes not always understood things or agreed with me but she has always supported both me and my dh.  One of my greatest moments was when my mum came in to the maternity ward and held my daughter for the first time, it was totally amazing for both me and my mum. xx


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## fizzbuzz (Nov 28, 2013)

Thank you all for your lovely replies and support.
It is now even more of a dilemma as to whether she should be tested at this point and/or choose to have some eggs frozen if possible as I contacted Professor Robert Winston for his advise re clinics and he is very much against testing and egg freezing saying that the tests are not validated and the results can be misleading. Also that because egg freezing is a relatively new procedure there has not been enough time for anybody to study the long-term effects on babies born from frozen eggs and that there is a real possibility, based on limited animal studies, that 'frozen' conceptions may lead to changes in good health in later life, and possibly changes in cognitive ability. 
My daughter hasn't been diagnosed with POI as yet and may be fortunate enough not to experience it so perhaps she should wait and see what happens and have testing done if she begins to show signs of it in the future. 
What would others advise? ultimately it is her decision but has anyone else found themselves in the same position as she is now and what did they or would they do?
Thank you again for reading my ramblings


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Hi there.  I didn't face the particular potential issues that your daughter might so can't really comment on it.  But tbh no body knows what the future holds and trying to predict what may or may not happen is hard let a lone when there is no partiuclar test.  Im a carrier of a genetic condition and pregnant with a child with the same genetic make us as me.  So basically what this means is that my son (i know its a boy, will have a high chance of struggling to conceive).  This is something that we are going to have to deal with as and when the time comes.


My friend is single and in her 30s she tried to find out about egg storage and she was told the same.  xx


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## livity k (May 19, 2009)

Not sure about the whole freezing thing but having an assessment now would give an indicator of whether your daughter has a good ovarian reserve or not and that would give her more information to go on. 

The newer egg freezing techniques are much less damaging to eggs and have better success rates. But I would agree it is all quite untested with eggs but sperm and embryos have been successfully frozen for a while. 

Livity


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## Keeping busy (Apr 13, 2011)

Obviously it will be your daughters decision but if it came to it there are other options she could think about, such as donor eggs, in the future. Good luck whatever you decide


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