# So upset



## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Hi, sorry this is going to be a bit of a woe is me post  So you can see from my sig we are trying for no 2. We have had 4 attempts this year, 1 fresh abandoned due to my lining, 1 FET abandoned due to my lining one FET which resulted in me bleeding 5dpt and are currently having a fresh cycle as we speak, it's EC today so my poor DW is having proceedure now while I'm at home with our ds. 
On Saturday I started having the smallest amount of spotting which progressed through yesterday and I started the progesterone support as advised by clinic. Today it is more and turning red (sorry tmi) so I am fairly sure my lining has gone again. I have scan later today to confirm this.
This means all eggs collected today will need to be frozen tommorow and we will be looking at doing an FET in the new year which upsets me in itself as they won't let me do natural it has to be medicated which means we are prob looking at Feb/March before we can try again as I will need a period followed by the pill for 3 weeks etc, you get the picture. 
Right now I feel like I have let my family down badly again. My poor DW for having to go through all this not to get a fresh transfer at least, and my poor son who desperately needs a sibling and has just started asking for one  
I am so scared there must be something wring with me for this to keep happening and I am worried because ds birth was traumatic and required a manual removal that some damage has been done to my uterus and that is why I cannot sustain a lining. 
Also I am so angry at my clinic for allowing me to go through this again, given my history they have not really changed much other than have me down reg with injections rather than spray and add on gestone for extra luteul support which makes me howl when I think about it as I have only got that far once in the last few goes so what difference they thought that would make given it's pre transfer I have the issue with, I don't seem able to even get to post when this would become useful. 
I am so sad at the prospect of failing again, it feels like a siing is slipping further and further from our grasp and I really don't know where we go from here. 
Sorry for the moan, just feeling awful today x


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

I'm so sorry this is happening to you, it's just s**t. You were so good to me during my pprom & I just wish I could return the favour, but I don't know anything about lining. I hope that your scan brings you good news & I'll keep everything crossed for you, DW & D!!


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## Platypus (Dec 3, 2011)

So sorry to hear what you're going through Tinki, it sounds like a long journey you have been on. Take strength in your family, they won't be blaming you but will be wanting to support you. ((((hugs))))


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## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Thank you guys it means a lot for me that you replied.
Update is that we got 14 eggs which is brilliant  just wait to see how many fertilise etc tommorow but hopefully will still be a good number.
For me they can't identify the source of the blood and it seems to have eased off so they have upped my progesterone BUT the lining is still ok for transfer ATM. Basically we have said we will go ahead and allow them to grow the embryos hopefully to blast and they will do a scan to check my lining on day of transfer so we won't know until then if it will be going ahead or not, unless of course it gets worse again in the next few days and then they will postpone ie freeze whatever they can, so it's major fingers crossed here for the next few days x


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## BecsW (Jun 14, 2009)

Tinki, that sounds much more hopeful    I hope the next few days continue to bring good news for you and that you will indeed be PUPO very soon    and the other ladies are right, your family will want to support you xxx


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

I will keep everything crossed for you - even my legs hahaha!! xxxxx


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## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Hahaha  
Out of the 14 4 were immature and 9 fertilised so hopefully heading for blast transfer on Saturday which is great as it gives me a few more days for my body to settle down, feeling much brighter today, thanks everyone x


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## Candy76 (Feb 19, 2011)

Tinki,
Glad things look better.

Not sure if this is a silly question as you have obviously chosen that route for a good reason. But could you put the fertilized eggs back in your DP, if your lining won't play ball?

Hoping the best for you!
Candy


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## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Hi Candy, not a silly question no but we have done it this way as due to health reasons  in the past it's simply not worth the risk for DW to carry a pregnancy, quite apart from the fact that she has no real desire to carry a pregnancy herself. X


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

Hope everything is looking good for tomoz! x


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## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Thanks WG, had 7 lovely embryos on Thursday so hoping to have a couple to choose fro
Tommorow, just need them to give me the ok on the lining and I should be PUPO by 11.30am! Feeling sick as a dog from the extra progesterone but right now I don't care as it seems to be working  x


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

Really hope it all goes well & that this is the 'one'


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## Pinktink (Dec 17, 2008)

Fingers crossed for you guys xxx


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## BecsW (Jun 14, 2009)

Best of luck Tinki xxx


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## tinki (Oct 5, 2010)

Thanks guys x


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