# IVF and alcohol..



## Maybebaby77 (Mar 6, 2013)

..with the occasional cigarette. 

Am I mad?! Yes, probably. But I am due to start stimming at the end of April (will go straight to that as on short protocol, second attempt) and I am still drinking wine once or twice a week and with that having a few cigarettes. I don't smoke every day, I am completely using both things as a crutch to cope with my stress and sadness. Utterly stupid I know but am I alone in being this way?! I hate myself but I can't seem to stop! I think I've given up before I even start this second attempt as I simply don't think it will work for me! 

e


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## Missy122 (Jan 8, 2011)

I kind of know how you feel, although I don't smoke and rarely drink anyway so I don't miss it my problem is my weight.

I know my BMI has to be under 30 for treatment but I'm on the verge and have been this weight for years. I know if I lose weight my chances will increase but the more I think about it the more I comfort eat through the stress of it all! Totally strange state of mind I must be in  

I'm sure everything in moderation is ok?


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## Maisyz (Dec 15, 2010)

Maybe, you just have to do what's comfortable for you. I've never smoked and don't drink. I'm currently worrying myself stupid about whether decaff tea and coffee is harmful as someone said it could be, it's making me a nutter so I'd say just do what you feel comfortable with. Oh and Missy don't worry about weight, I've always been ideal weight and still no baby so don't sweat that either.


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## melloumaw (Feb 2, 2012)

whilst not condoned by medics, how many women smoke drink and take drugs and still go on to have perfect babies,
i think if it eases your stress at the moment then it cant hurt, but is it worth trying an ecig to help break the habit,i have used them from vapourlites and find them very good
the occasional glass of wine is actually good for you according to research


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## Tansy (Mar 16, 2013)

Hi ,yes I am such a cup of tea lover ,but I agree you have to do what makes you feel relax ,we have gone through enough so,a well deserve tea/wine can't be that bad .


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## alexine (Jun 8, 2010)

I'm sorry to be the devil's avocado but there is a lot of evidence that states smoking and drinking prior to and during IVF could compromise egg quality. If you are going to put yourself through the hell of IVF why not try and find another way to relax? 
xxA


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## incywincy (Nov 13, 2011)

alexine said:


> I'm sorry to be the *devil's avocado* but there is a lot of evidence that states smoking and drinking prior to and during IVF could compromise egg quality. If you are going to put yourself through the hell of IVF why not try and find another way to relax?
> xxA


Hehe!

I agree with alexine. The way I see it, if you get a BFP, you're going to have to give up anyway. If giving up is going to cause some stress, won't it be bad for you doing it when that precarious little embie is only just digging in? Smoking, in particular seriously affects IVF succcess rates. IVF costs so much - either your own money or the NHS's - why jepoardise your chances by continuing to smoke and drink?

I speak as someone who very, very much liked a good drink and was a regular smoker. I definitely think you should find a way to ditch the ****. With the wine, it depends how much you're drinking once or twice a week, if it's just a glass each night, it won't have a huge impact, but they say anything over 5 units a week is detrimental to IVF.

Think of it this way - if it doesn't work again, do you want to give yourself something to regret? Try to do everything you can to minimise the 'what if's. I don't think you're alone in this, and it is understandable that you're worried it won't work again, but you need to find a way to approach it positively and do everything you can to make it work.


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## hjones (Oct 12, 2010)

Try not to beat yourself up too much, but I'd try to stop I wish drinking and smoking small amounts up to the month before starting meds but felt i couldn't look myself in the eyes if it didn't work again. 
Try acupuncture that helps me relax, yoga/pilates and drink fruit tea.
Worse come to the worse and you need some wine evidence says a malbec is the best to drink.
Good luck!


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## staceysm (Nov 18, 2010)

Hi,

I don't smoke, but continued to have 1 to 2 glasses of wine a week up until ET and both my cycles have resulted in pregnancies.

I worked full time and found that a a glass or two on a weekend helped me chill and relax.  There is no evidence at all to suggest that such small quantities effect treatment.

I actually have friends who gave up everything for 6 months leading up to there ICSI treatment which failed.  They then decided to have a 6 month break, therefore went back to eating and drinking whatever they wanted, low and behold 3 months later she got pregnant naturally.

I personally think that the stressing of TTC causes more problems.

X


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## PorkPie (Feb 12, 2013)

I totally agree with staceysm. Stress has a massive impact on success, and I think being relaxed and happy is important. 

With both, it depends how much you are doing, as has been been said, 1 glass of wine 2 or 3 times a week shouldn't be detrimental. With smoking it's less clear and I'm just guessing here, but while smoking 20 a day is probably going to have a negative impact on your fertility, a couple of **** 2 or 3 times a week is a different story.

I have no medical or clinical knowledge to back up the above,it's JMO.

Good luck with your treatment!


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## alexine (Jun 8, 2010)

Here's a link that may be helpful in shedding some light. According to this study smoking lowers AMH.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2866786/

IVF is hellish and all I'm trying to say is you owe it to yourself to give yourself the best shot possible.
It's really hard giving up wine and **** when you are really stressed and so much is one the line, but for me it would be even harder to live with myself knowing I could have maybe done something over the short term to increase my chances of success and didn't.

I'm not trying to be harsh but just offer the other side of the coin....we all want to rationalize a few drinks and maybe a couple cigarettes but maybe it's not such a great idea if we are putting are whole beings and bank accounts into trying for a baby.

It's not easy and wishing you all the very best of luck for a BFP!   

xxA

This post contains an unconfirmed link/information and readers are reminded that FertilityFriends.co.uk or its owners are not responsible for the content of external internet sites


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## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

it is very common for people to 'self-sabotage', i have done it myself many times in various situations...it's like when you leave an assignment to the last minute, so that if you get a low grade you can tell yourself it was just because you didn't have enough time, not because you weren't good enough. it's normal to fear failure, it's not stupid. 

there are so many things that can go wrong when TTC and it is so easy to think 'well i can't fix them all so why bother?' or 'it's bound to go wrong anyway so i might as well...' or 'i usually fail so i expect to this time', or 'i don't deserve for this to work because i'm a bad person/a failure...' ..low self esteem then provides the perfect excuse to carry on doing the behaviour you're trying to stop, because you think you don't deserve any better, and of course believing you're not able to stop then lowers your self-esteem.

smoke and drink if you want to. but don't blame doing it on 'not being able to stop'. It is just a vicious circle. Expect to win. Expect to succeed. Expect to be strong. Raise your self-esteem and trust yourself to do the right thing, for you, because you can. because you want to. If you manage to have a baby you may feel, as i do, that anything you could do to give yourself even one more day with that baby would be worth any amount of pain or suffering or being deprived of things that are hard to give up, because we have lost so much time already not being able to spend it with our children, so every moment will be precious. when we hold that baby we aren't going to want to waste a second on drinking or smoking... we'll be busy trying to live as long as possible to stay healthy and enjoy time with our children...

you deserve to be happy and healthy. make the choices that are right for you.


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## Faithope (Jan 16, 2011)

Hi,

I read this http://www.nice.org.uk/nicemedia/live/12157/59278/59278.pdf and made my choice not to drink alcohol or anything with Caffeine in it. I have a history of MC's and caffeine is something that always seems to crop up so for my peace of mind, I have stopped it all, chocolate, tea, no coke (not that I drink it anyway except at christmas  ) and definatley no alcohol. They say it's all fine in moderation in Natural conception but for IVF TX, it's a whole different ball game.

Hope this helps xx

/links


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## irishflower (Apr 13, 2012)

I don't agree with the argument that lots of women who smoke, drink, take recreational drugs etc. etc.go on to have healthy babies....that's true of course, but we need ivf so are in a different category altogether!  I only ever smoked occasionally, and enjoyed a couple of glasses of wine a week but stopped the cigarettes completely a few months before treatment, cut down on the wine, and then also stopped it (and caffeine) during treatment (which was successful).  I would have felt tremendously guilty if treatment hadn't worked and I'd continued to smoke, drink etc.  

Having said that, I don't think the occasional glass of wine/cup of coffee will have much of an impact.  Smoking however, does harm egg quality, and even if one embryo successfully implants, the risks of something going wrong during a pregnancy also increase due to it.  It's something you'd stop when pregnant anyway so why not give it a go a bit earlier to give your body the maximum chance of successful treatment?

Good luck!


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## melloumaw (Feb 2, 2012)

i didnt mean it is classed as acceptable, just not to be too hard on yourself if you slip,hence suggesting an electric cig to quit etc


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## Maybebaby77 (Mar 6, 2013)

Firstly, thank you so much for taking the time to reply. And secondly, thank you all SO much for being constructive in your advice and not judging me. That really meant a lot and I know I am in the right place for support now. 

I'm going to read your replies again and again whenever I don't feel very strong and know that they will help me. In fact they already have. I feel more positive already that I can cut down the vino and ditch the occasional ****. 


It's got to be worth it right. And maybe I am feeling so down and negative because I know I am self-sabotaging!! Well, that and my rubbish womb lining dammit! 

Thank you so much ladies xx


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## alexine (Jun 8, 2010)

That's the spirit Maybebaby! You and your embies deserve your all.... go for it in the best way that you can!   
xxA


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## ♥JJ1♥ (Feb 11, 2006)

Maybebaby77 said:


> Firstly, thank you so much for taking the time to reply. And secondly, thank you all SO much for being constructive in your advice and not judging me. That really meant a lot and I know I am in the right place for support now.
> 
> I'm going to read your replies again and again whenever I don't feel very strong and know that they will help me. In fact they already have. I feel more positive already that I can cut down the vino and ditch the occasional ****.
> 
> ...


do try and give yourself and your baby the best chance - my friend who were smokers and got pregnant naturally said the moment she found out it was like she didn't want a cigarette it was like natures way of helping her. Whenever I have had to have awful things done over my 9 ivf cycles and numerous ops along the way I have always said to myself 'you have to do this for your baby' and had to get on with it.

L xx


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## melloumaw (Feb 2, 2012)

well done maybe chin up and march onwards
mel x


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## yogabunny (Sep 12, 2012)

maybe - good for you. 
i stopped smoking about 8 months ago, i hardly smoked anymore, but needed the ocasional *** after a stressful day, or to light up and gossip with an old friend. i am so pleased i managed to knock it on the head. ivf was the motivator, i found i could give up for a potential baby easier than for my own health! but now i feel better in general, and it forced me to find other better things to rely on. 
i didn't drink or have caffeine during tx, but in the end i had a couple of glasses of fizz at a wedding before et during my fet - the odd drink can be good to let go, and have some release i think. 
it is a weird thing in our heads that we need these things to keep sane, both cigs and alcohol don't really make you feel any better, in the end you feel more anxious/wired after a cheeky cigarette and a bit depressed the morning after a big night of drinking...
good luck! x


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## Ellie.st (Mar 11, 2005)

Although I'm not a smoker, I know what it's like trying to do everything possible to make IVF work (diet, supplements, cutting our alcohol and caffeine, losing weight etc) while feeling stressed about it.      There's a lot of evidence against smoking when ttc and personally I think that you should cut out the alcohol too (and that's official government advice at the moment as well).  This will help with your chances of success with IVF but you know all this already...  So, what I would suggest, like some of the others have said, is that you focus not on the IVF process (which just leads to the same old stress, conflict and maybe even a bit of self-sabotaging) and that instead you focus on the baby you are trying to have - you want to do your very best for it so that means getting rid of all the toxins and making your body as healthy as possible for it, not just when it is a egg or an emby but right through pregnancy and after it is born.  

I think as well that you have to ignore all the comments about other women who drink and smoke when ttc and pregnant  and have no problems - it's simply not the case that all of them go on to have healthy babies.  Some of them have miscarriages; some of them have babies who develop problems during pregnancy; some of them have problems which develop later on (eg learning difficulties, asthma, even cot death etc).  When my DD was in SCBU for eight weeks (she was born early due to pre-eclampsia, and there was nothing I could have done to avoid it), there was a group of premature babies with low birthweight-associated problems in the unit whose mothers met regularly outside for *** breaks.  There was almost certainly a link between their smoking and their babies' problems- it was just that no-one pointed it out to them.  

Can you find other ways to treat yourself/cheer yourself up instead of relying on wine or cigarettes?  Everyone is different but how about some nice chocolate (the caffeine is low and there are good nutrients in it too  )  or something relaxing like acupuncture or reflexology, or even just taking time to lie on the sofa with a good movie or book?

Wishing you lots and lots of       for your next tx.

Ellie


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## irishflower (Apr 13, 2012)

Brilliant post Ellie!


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