# Newbie with lots of questions. Help appreciated ..



## MrsPCOS (Nov 20, 2011)

Hi Everyone,

I'm 34 and have recently decided to go it alone after getting sick of waiting for "Mr Right".

I had lots of tests done in 2007 with my then partner, so know that I have PCOS and one blocked fallopian tube that cannot be unblocked (they did try). I don't ovulate (or didn't at the time and still don't have any signs of ovulation now).

I was told after the tests that I could give Clomid a try, and if that didnt work it would be IVF.

When I went back to the doctors recently I was told that the policy had changed and whereas previously the doctor could have prescribed Clomid, only the hospital could do it now. So I've been referred back.

These are my questions. I am in the North East if location makes a difference. I have no children.

1. Is being single going to cause a problem ? The doctor asked how long I'd been with my partner. I wasn't expecting to be asked this and found myself saying "a year". Does the NHS refuse Clomid and / or IVF for single women ? Is it best to claim to have a partner ? I don't think I could afford private treatment.

2. Sperm donation - I'm not keen on the idea of an anonymous donor at the moment. I'm thinking of joining something like co-parentmatch. Has anyone tried this ? Does anyone have any tips on doing things safely ? How do people even go about doing it ? Do you meet up somewhere and he does the business that passes it to you ? It does seem a little bit seedy but I've really never though about how people go about these things and the official routes just don't give enough information for me. I want to know what the donor looks like so a clinic I don't think would work for me.

Thanks in adavnce for any help.


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## BroodyChick (Nov 30, 2009)

Hi Mrs PCOS 
I found a wonderful book called 'PCOS and your fertility' it gives you loads of tips on what to try in order to get your bits working again, the natural way.
It is mostly about changing diet etc, but also has tips on Clomid etc.

If you have any questions about co-parenting/private home insemination, I am happy to answer them in a private message. Currently on 2WW after meeting a great co-parent in June


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## morrigan (Dec 8, 2009)

welcome Mrs PCOS- It was the case that not many PCTs funded single woman but recent newspaper articles suggest there may be a few. I think you would have to contact your local PCT to find out there policy. 

My understanding would be ( cant swear im right !)
I dont think you could claim to have a partner unless you had a known donor/coparent that was willing to do this also as they will want to assess the partners fertility as well before commencing any treatment. I think most clinics may treat donors differently if they treat them as donor rather than partner as they will expect them samples for 6 month quarentine.

Good luck with your journey.

In the uk the only option ( if your not using known donor) you have is to use open ID donors- treatment is not allowed in uk with anonymous donors.


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## MrsPCOS (Nov 20, 2011)

Thanks for the replies. Is a donor who is willing to be known who is found on a co-parenting site ok ?

Testing the other person would be pointless, as the consultatnt last time made it clar the problem was mine and my then partner was tested and had super sperm. If they ask him to come in it could get complicated lol


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## morrigan (Dec 8, 2009)

Mrs PCOS i think that if clinic know they are a donor of any sort they will treat the same as sperm donor and want all the std testing which has to be repeated after 6 months before they will let you use them. If you went to the clinic as a couple they would tx you as any other couple and prob only do tests once at time of treatment! no idea how they define couples.

Some of the sperm banks provide pretty comprehensive profiles of donors including baby photos etc if you didnt want to go down the co-parenting route.

Im pretty sure the NHS will def want to do full assessment of male partner even if you have an issue especially as your gp has written a referral probably stating that you have been with your partner a year. You will also need partners consent signed i think.


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