# c



## PositiveNellie (Aug 8, 2008)

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## livity k (May 19, 2009)

huge hug,   

I'm not over 40 but having had 3 failed tx- I know how scary it is, we're going again in may and while I know it is what i want it really scares me- 

I think you have been mentally giving yourself a break and suddenly you are in that at risk position again- it is the old you can't fail if you don't try thing- well that's what I feel,

how long have you got till tx if you decide to go with it? Have you got a bit of time to get your head round it, have some counselling maybe? Is the fact it is a donor egg an issue?

Good luck with everything

Livity


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## olgakorbut (Jul 5, 2008)

Hi LS

Not been non this board for a while as on Reprofit, Czech board now.  Just to give you some encouragement, I am 46 and am going in April to have DE again, so you are never too old to try, as I havent given up.  I did get pg from FET there last Sept, but unfortunately lost them.  FET gave me 35%, this time we are doing fresh which gives me 60%, so Im having one lost shot.  If I get more than 2 5-day blasts these will be frozen so I can try again, but I have asked for 3 to be put back this time - we have to discuss this when I go.  

I will be 47 just before I have tx, so please dont give up.  Thought this would give you some encouragement, plus another lady on these boards I talk to sometimes is now 52 and it has worked for her.

Good luck!
Kathy xxxx


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## nbr1968 (Feb 25, 2008)

Hi

If you weren't scared there would be somethings amiss - Livity is right - you are now facing the very real prospect of being a Mummy and Daddy, of achieving something you have gone to hell and back to achieve and you are also starting on the Donor route, and no doubt have worries about what you will do if that does not work out? I know that is how I have felt all through our txs - each time you move the goal posts - the first tx, you wonder will it work, but prepare yourself for it not working knowing you have more tries. The more txs you have the more you realise that your options are narrowing - you are having to make more and more compromises and you feel less and less control.

All of that is scary. It is natural to wonder about it not working with donor (I assume it is DE?) - you must be wondering if it does not work, how many "tries" you will be able to do. When you think about all of this it is a bit like gambling - for a worthy cause, but gambling nonetheless. We put all our hooe (and money) mainly in  someone else's hands and then so much of it comes down to nature or luck - whatever you call it, the odds are always pretty daunting.

Coupled with the financial burdens that you also have to face - the fact that you find yourself where you are now, you should give yourself a big pat on the back! Going "over the top" and into the unknown takes real courage each time.

I know that counselling is advised - there are not always the time or resources of course, but as Livity says, you need to totally sure that you are ready to go down this route because when it it successful (how's that for PMA!) you won't be able to wind back the clock.

Anyway, I wish you the best of luck

take care 
Nbr68xx


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## rosie1K (Aug 19, 2009)

Hi there   

I agree with the others and I can also empathise, I have just had pretty much the same feelings just before coming out here to cyprus, I suddenly found myself really scared and really worrying about it not working and also working !!! I was thinking about being too old to be a mum (I am 46) and what if I got pregnant and then lost it again, all sorts of weird thoughts. Anyway I had 3 lovely embies put in yesterday and I can tell you I now have no such worries, I am so in love with my babies, my DP, everyone in fact, and I know this is absolutely the right thing for us to have done. So I would say normal pre treatment nerves, being successful is scarry as it opens you up to a whole new world of worries but it is oh so worth it.

God luck to you hun    

Rosie


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