# My first post... TTC for a year now ... :-(



## Nautical1985 (Jun 1, 2014)

Hi all, we are new to the forum but just looking for some advice. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for about a year now. I had a BFP in December 2013, unfortunately resulting in a miscarriage, I still don’t know to this day if it was a true pregnancy or a chemical one. 

We have been to the doctor regarding our concerns and trying for a year without any success as most couples would and we have had some tests done on both of us. I have been told I am fine and everything is normal and there is no reason why i shouldn’t fall pregnant, unfortunately my husband has low motility and aggluation of his sperm. The doctor is now going through the form filling for IVF, and they have said that ICSI is not suitable for my husband. We are both taking supplements and trying to make changes to diets and lifestyles to help. 

My husband works offshore 4 weeks on and 4 weeks off so timing is difficult with regards to ovulation windows for us anyway. We would really like to conceive naturally however feel this might be out of our control so we would like to hear if any of you have some advice for us and if there is hope on the horizon it would be good to hear some success stories too. 

Do you know why ICSI would not be suitable? 

Also be good to know how many times we should be doing the deed during high fertility periods with the nature of husbands sperm. This really is an emotional rollercoaster, and it is heart breaking every month. 

Thanks all


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## ayah (Dec 18, 2013)

Didnt want to read and run Nautical.  It is a very emotional time, ttc, test possible treatments.  Cant really advice of your specific questions as not my own expirence.  But do both be kind to yourselves and eachother.  If you do have IVF be prepaired for it.  From my own expirence it is tougher, physically mentally and emotionally than you would imagine.  And despite the positivity with the first cycle it may not work first time.  But dont be disheartened.  It does work for many people.  And FF is a great place to get advice and support through the ups and downs.  And prehaps find some relaxation techniques that you like.

Really hope you have a positive outcome for natural or failing that IVF very soon..  all best

Ayah xxx


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## suzylee (Oct 5, 2012)

I don't know why your doctor says ICSI wouldnt be suitable?! From what you have said it would be necessary.

Have a look at this website www.invitro24.co.uk there is a list of different treatments and an explanation of what they mean. They have ICSI and IMSI which is similar. It's always good to have an understanding so you can ask relevant questions 

If your getting referred for IVF you will get a consultation and they will decide what course of treatment is best anyway.

Good luck x

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## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

Nautical - I am also at a loss as to why your doctor has mentioned that icsi isnt appropriate for your circumstances.  My hubby has issues - ie no sperm in the ejaculate - but 9 months on multivitamins and we didn't have to use our sperm donor.  Any issues with male sperm, ICSI 'is' the most appropriate as the embriologist can choose the strongest looking 'candidate' to fertilize the egg.

But yes, FF is a fantastic place to be - and you're never alone.
Welcome hun
Sheila


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## Bela (Mar 26, 2014)

Hi Nautical, Ladies 

I also had a MC around the same time as you. It was my first ever pregnancy, and nothing since then. I am worried and frustrated but there's so little that we can really do alone, especially if there are health issues. I'd like to recommend a book very famous "Taking Charge of Your Fertility", it is quite useful and helped me to better understand my cycle and conception. Other than that, Vitex is being widely recommended to regulate hormones and the cycle itself. It's not something that I've tried but I intend to.

My DH's sperm quality is also low. There's not much we can do about it. He takes Pregnacare for men and avoids hot showers, overheating the jewels and cycling. Some say missionary position during BD is a good option, others that doggy style is best for low sperm motility. It was also recommended to us by our andrologist that DH abstains from ejaculation 3 days before fertile period, then BD every other day - aiming for the exact day of ovu. The thing is that weak sperm needs more time to build up quality, hence ejaculations should be less frequent.

Good luck and hope your doctor is a helpful one, if not demand it!


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## mscandy35 (Sep 4, 2013)

Hi,
Studies have shown you can improve your chances if you have sex once a day, every day (as long as his sperm are OK) during the fertile 4-5 days prior to, and the day of, ovulation. In those rare circumstances when the man does not have enough sperm (oligospermia), the old rule of once every other day still holds true . In addition, researchers recommend that the average couple who is trying to conceive should make love regularly 2-3 times a week, every week because you don't know exactly when ovulation happens.

Meanwhile, I am just wondering, on what basis a doctor has made a conclusion of unsuitability to ICSI . Essentially, as long as a man is producing some normal sperm, ICSI is possible. Even if the sperm count is zero, it may be possible to perform a surgical procedure to obtain sperm, as long as the testicles are normal and not poorly developed or seriously damaged. This would initially be assessed by examination and subsequent hormone blood tests.
As far as my knowledge goes, ICSI is not suitable for couples with oocyte defects and this is not your case . ICSI is likely to be recommended if your spouse has a very low or zero sperm count or a high percentage of abnormally shaped sperm or sperm that can't be ejaculated but can be collected from the testicles or from the duct where sperm is stored (epididymis). This may be needed if your spouse has had an irreversible vasectomy or injury. Or if he has problems with getting an erection and ejaculating, due to spinal cord injuries or diabetes, for example.
However, ICSI isn't the solution to every male fertility problem. If your spouse has a low sperm count as a result of a genetic problem, this could be passed on to any sons you have together. Your doctor should usually recommend that your spouse has a blood test before you start the ICSI cycle.
My best bet is to get proper and adequate information and then decide plan of action. Hope it helps .
Best wishes,
Candy.


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