# new to clomid - support required!



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,

I've just signed up - this is a great site.

I started my first cycle of clomid in November and am now on the 2ww.  I'm finding it really hard - I can't take my mind off it all and keep going to the toilet to check for AF.  My back aches and I've got twinges but that could be my IBS.  I've got pregnant twice (both early miscarriages) and both times I was convinced I was getting my period. The signs seem to be pretty much the same. 

Has anyone got any tips on how to get through this?  Also, I've had weird CM today- like mulched up white paper!  Could that be due to the CLomid, is it the progestrone effect do you reckon?  
In fact, has anyone noticed that they feel effects of the Clomid at times other than when actually taking the pills and at ovulation?
And another thing... does anyone always seem to get ill alot, particularly in the 2nd half their cycle, natural or otherwise??
It is driving me crazy, feel like I'm either ill or a hormonal crazy chick!!  


Hope everyone is having a good day.
Vicster
x


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## Helenb33 (Mar 29, 2004)

Hi Vicster,
I'm sorry to hear you are having a tough time at the moment. 
I'm not sure I've got much wise advice, other than to say I've had Clomid side effects beyond the five days when I actually take it, and quite a few girls on here have said the same thing. 
I haven't been getting ill, but I have been really tired.  
I've tried really really hard to avoid even thinking about the 2ww, but lord knows it's hard isn't it ? Hang in there, and here's hoping for a Christmas BFP for you
Best wishes
Helen x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vickster,


What cycle day are you on??

It sounds like I'm in the same boat as you! I started my first cycle of clomid back in Nov too.

I'm on day 31 and no signs of AF either, I keep going to the loo to check, it's mental 

As for the side effects, I didn't have any hot flushes, but my DH said I was more snappy than usuall  

I hope the clomid works for you   (me too) keep me posted.

Hope to chat soon,

Take care Susan xxx

Sent some bubbles your way


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Thanks Helen and Susan for your replies.

Susan- I'm on day 30, so we are pretty much in the same boat!  Scans showed I probably ovulated on day 19 or 20, so AF is probably due this Wednesday or Thursday.  Mind you, in my my last natural cycle I got my period only 10 days after ovulation.

I'm so hoping for a BFP, otherwise I'll have to take the pills again over xmas which won't be much fun for me or my family!  I suppose I'll be well looked after though and won't have to try and work - last time, my colleagues commented on how drugged out I looked and I was pratically falling asleep at my computer! I went home early and felt like I was walking on cotton wool!
And if I get a BFP, I'll be so scared of losing it again - but I have to be strong and be positive.  It is comforting to know others are going through all this too.  None of my friends are, which of course is good cos I wouldn't wish it on any of them, but it makes me feel alone.

Keep me posted too.  I really hope it works for you too!
Thanks for the bubbles - haven't worked them out yet!
Better go and help DH cook


Vicster xx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, just wanted to say    (and thanks for your tip about Tixylix on Minxy's CM thread), keeping fingers crossed for you that you get a ! (and for you too, Susan!) 

Re the side effects continuing, luckily for me I don't get that many side effects (am currently taking clomid for the 4th month, on day 3 of pills) apart from it making me a bit waspy and irritable at times, BUT the first time I took it I had a wierd dizzy spell when I felt all weak and spaced out while I was shopping, it was a bit scary and I'm sure it was the clomid although it was a few days after I had finished taking the pills.  Also the fertility nurse said it can still work on your follicles etc the month after you finish taking it so presumably it can still have side effects too!

To blow bubbles, if you look at the persons profile to the left of each post you will see the words "click to blow", just click and blow!  

Best of luck and merry Christmas!
Sarah xx


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## sammylou2 (Sep 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster

Welcome to FF and the   (crazy) world of clomid....!!

The s/e vary from month to month and person to person but to be honest i have felt ropey right from the start and if I'm not bloated it's an attack of the hot flushes   my cycle appears to have increased by a couple of days too which is a pain!!

As for mulchy cm i noticed on one of the other threads that someone had thicker cm before a bfp so you never know chick   ??

Anyway fingers crossed for testing and keep us posted 

Sam xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

AF today so am feeling deflated,in agony from tummy cramps and generally feeling down as my first baby which miscarried at 12 weeks would have been due tomorrow - have had to take the day off work. I was trying not to get excited but I had been waking up all week with nausea and the pregnant feeling and having weird moments of euphoria - my body and mind like to play horrid tricks on me!
Oh well, all I can do is remain hopeful for next time.
Thank you for all the lovely messages - have sent everyone a bubble!
Hope you are all getting on ok.
It's going to be a Clomid fuelled Christmas!  My poor family!


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vickster,

Sorry the witch turned up  , guess what she turned up for me too .

I'm on day 2 of my second cycle so also have to start taking the crazy pills tomorrow , AF very heavy more so than usuall (tmi sorry), so sore, I'm full of a flu type thing at the mo too, just great!!!

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow, stay strong


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi again Vickster,

Sorry hadn't finished typing and pressed the wrong button by mistake  this cold i  can't concentrate!!

Well we'll have to keep eachother informed how it goes this month, 

Great start I phoned up for my day 12 scan today, which is meant to be on the 31st but I have to go on the 29th, thats only day 10!!! 

Sent you some bubbles,

Have a lovely Christmas, talk to you soon,


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, I was so sorry to read that AF had got you    it's such a horrible feeling isn't it.  Just wanted to send you a hug really and say I hope you can still have a lovely Christmas.  I am going to start taking the Tixylix today although am a bit confused about how much to take and how often so am going for 10ml every 4 hours - I hope this is right!  Thanks very much for telling us about the Tixylix.  Am sending you another hug and lots of positive vibes      , lets hope we both get a  in the new year.  Keep that chin up darlin.

Lots of love
Sarah xxx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Susan, I have just read that the witch turned up for you too   I'm really sorry.  My AF turned up last Friday and it was devastating - somehow the fact Christmas is nearly here made it seem even sadder.  But we have all got to hang in there together and one day we will get that magic ! Take care of yourself and have a happy Christmas.

lots of love
Sarah xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,
Susan  - Hope your cold is getting better and the clomid isn't getting you down. My AF is the heaviest it has ever been - must be the clomid.  Am getting into a positive frame of mind hoping that this will be the month!  I got scanned the first month and the clinic decided that I was on the right dose so don't need to go back for the next 2 months.  I'm kind of relieved cos it was so tiring going for early morning scans before work every other day , but part of me would rather be monitored.  Will just go with it and see what happens.  

Sarah - I can't remember how much mixture to take and which website I found it from but wll let you know when I've remembered!

Better go and get some shut eye.
Look after yourselves.Lots of luck and hugs 
Vicster


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Sarah,
The recommended dosage on this website

http://www.fertilityplus.org/faq/cm.html


Have a grat Christmas
x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Thanks Vicster, I have only just got back online after Christmas break - have printed it off (bought 3 bottles of tixylix!)  Hope you had a lovely christmas and new year - here's hoping 2007 will be our year   

Thanks again,
Sarah xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Sarah and Susan,
Hope you had good Christmas and New year and are surviving the Clomid.
I had a nice break and didn't have such bad side effects this time so that was a relief.  I was very snappy though and lost my temper with a  relative which was a bit embarrassing! Oh, and another friend is pregnant after only a couple of months trying.  
Am feeling a bit stressed today as went to see my gp again to try and get them to refer me for miscarriage tests but they still won't budge as will only do after 3.  Anyway, what got me down was the doctor saying that I should be more worried about dh's poor sperm results as a factor in the miscarriages.  And now I'm stressing about that, even though I know I shouldn't until he gets the latest results and final verdit from his consultant in February.  I don't think they can do much for men, can they? I can't stand all the uncertainty of this!  It is horrible, I hate it and I so feel for everyone on this site. 
Right, enough, need to think positive!

How are you both doing?
xxx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vickster  

I had a lovely Christmas thanks, my Mum, Dad & little sis came to stay or a few days.
It was nice to see them as they live in Germany & don't get to see them as often as I'd like 

The clomid is going well (I think) Had a scan on Fri, day 10 (day 12 was new years eve, think hosp dept was closed?) well, I have to go again in the morning, day 15 for another scan, to see whats happend in the lat 5 days, but all was looking good for being day 10 anyway, the nurse said that my womb lining was I quote "reasonable". 

I had 4/5 follies on each side but all a bit small, so hopefully they have grown a bit this past few days   

Not too bad side effects either this month, but I have noticed that I've got a few spots on my chest like a sort of rash 

Sorry the doctor didn't refer you for the tests you wanted, that wasn't very understanding of him/her saying what they did to you, the doctor should of dealt with the situation in a more professional way,so to say.

Keep positive Vickster, try not to beat yourself up about it, I'm here whenever you need to have a chat/moan/cry ect,    

I'll chat to you soon, take care Susan xxx

PS Hi Sarah.


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, sorry to hear your doctor is being so unhelpful.  It's awful that they won't investigate until you've had 3 m/cs.  I suppose it all comes down to money as usual.  My dh hasn't got great sperm either - in his first SA 97% were abnormal (!) and in his second one 91% were abnormal.  Now that I have had 4 lots of clomid (I'm on 2WW but have no hope at all that it will work this time either) we are going to get another SA done.  Does your DH take supplements?  Mine has been taking zinc and all sorts of other things that apparently help - there are some amino acids called carnitine and arginine that you can get which are also supposed to be important in sperm production.  And of course all the other stuff like telling him NOT to keep his mobile in his trouser pockets, not to use laptops on laps, not to drive for hours on end without a break, not to wear tight pants (ooh matron) and all that sort of thing.

I know what you mean about another friend being pregnant after hardly trying, my SIL suddenly said the other day that a friend of hers is pregnant with twins, the last time she mentioned her (which wasn't long ago) she didn't even have a boyfriend.  It's not fair!   I was pretty down at Christmas about the whole not getting pg thing - did you see Dizzi's message at the home page of the whole site?  It's lovely and it sounds like she knows exactly how it feels!  Insensitive relatives - don't they just DO YOUR HEAD IN!!!  My DH's parents are a nightmare in that department.  They come out with stuff like "you'll just have to accept that some people don't have children" etc while cooing over their new 10 week old granddaughter from DH's sister.

Hi Susan, glad to hear you had a nice Christmas, I hope the day 15 scan had a good result for you - 4 or 5 follies - wow!  I only had one this month.

Take care both of you....

Sarah xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello!
I'm feeling more positive today - up and down like a yoyo I am.  Hope you are both doing ok.

Its probably a good idea Sarah that your dh is getting another sample as apparently they can vary dramatically.  Fingers crossed the next one is better.  My dh does take vitamins and gave up cycling so hopefully that will help! He prefers baggies to tight pants (but he's got a lovely backside!) and I've even got him airing his bits by wearing a sarong type thing at home!  He's not very good at keeping his mobile a safe distance though as he reckons he'll lose it if it isn't clipped to his waist (probably true)!  I find it difficult dealing with him also having problems as I feel even less in control!  


I really feel like I'm being left behind as like you one of my friends who's about to give birth didn't even have a boyfriend when we started trying!  I've become a bit obsessive about guessing women's ages and whether they are trying and then have to tell myself off and remember its not really a race and that I only really want my and dh's baby, not one of my friends!  I so wanted to have 3 children - spose that is from being one of three (my sister sadly died 13 years ago) Anyway, I'd always consider adopting and would like to after having at least one of my own. 

It must be really hard putting up with your inlaws cooing over your neice and making such annoying comments.  Some people just don't understand and don't even try to understand.  My inlaws are fairly understanding, particularly as dh's mother had 2 miscarriages too, but sometimes they come out with silly things like that the hot spicy food we eat might have caused the miscarriages!
I also get really cross with the media going on about how women put their careers first before having children and leave it too late. Well, if I'd have found a man who wanted to have babies with me before dh I would have started trying back then!  I spose I wouldn't have started trying until 25 as  I was a dancer in my early twenties.  Anyway at least my children (positive thinking) will have loving, caring parents! I reckon going through all this has brought me and dh closer together.

Well I'm ranting again so better go and have some dinner.

Susan - how are your scans going? I had similar follies last month when they scanned me - mine like to get very big before they pop (but apparently not too big as they checked that last time and that my womb lining sustained itself). Your scans so far sound positive so thats good.  Do you have to get them done really early before work?  I had to get to my hospital which is a bit of a drive for 8ish to get in the scan "queue" which knackered me out with all the jiggy (can;t remember the code for this!)  and I'm not a morning person!  Are you nhs? I am - we're going to stick with them unless we get told ivf is really the only option or we get really desperate and would then consider getting a loan to go private (2.5 year wait for nhs ivf in our area)

Sarah - how is your 2ww going?  It;s such an anxious time, impossible to take your mind off it.  I really hope that you get a BFP.

I really need to get into smilies as my messages look so dull and boring!
Here goes
    

some nice random ones!
xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Morning ladies,

Hope you are both OK?

It was my first day back at work yesterday after having 5 days off, so I feel a bit worn out, must get back in the swing of things. Ive eaten far too much over the festive period and must of put on around half a stone!! time to start being good i think     

As you both know I went for a day 15 scan yesterday, it was at 8.30am! the hospital is only 5 mins away from my house so it's not too bad really, I'm a bit confused really  whilst being scanned I was told that the big follie that was there on Fri wasn't there anymore (have i o/v'd ?) and that my lining had got very nice , well theres more.... also i was told that there was some liquid round my ovaries so they could tell that there had been activity going on  so I'm just going to wait and see what my blood test say next week as I really haven't a clue 

Yep I'm on the nhs too, like you Vickster we also are gonna stick with them, (no complaints so far) 

Sarah / Vickster what days are you both on at the mo, I think were all arond the same or very close isn't it?        

3 people on the estate I live on had babies over Christmas, so I know where both of you are coming from, I find it hard also, I don't tell anyone how I'm feeling, but really deep down I wish it was me.

Well better go back upstairs and get sorted, I'm on the 2-10 shift today great.

Talk to you both soon, have a good day,

Susan xxx


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## pinkbabi (Oct 17, 2006)

Hello, Welcome to Clomid girls.

I have been on Clomid for a short time, I have just finished my 3rd cycle of it. I am awaiting my AF, scan showed 7 follicles, so keeping everything crossed,, due anyday. We already have a lovely daughter aged 4 1/2, she was concieved after 1  month of trying. 

I so, understand you saying that it is driving you mad, running to the toilet to check every 5 minutes, quite exhausting actually! I have been very lucky and had very little side effects, I had headaches in the 1st cycle but all fine now.

If you have any questions, then I am sure one of the wonderful girls on here can help. 

GOOD LUCK to you all this month.

Vicky
xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Vicki, Vicci here!
It must be frustrating wanting a bro or sis for your little girl and it not being so easy this time round.  I really hope you get some positive news this month.  

Hi Susan, hope your work shift was ok. 
I was told that when the follicle disappears it probably means that you have ovulated. However, they can't be sure that there was a healthy egg inside the follie that was released when the follie popped.  I don't know about the liquid but sounds promising! I also don't know about the blood test as they didn't do that with me.  

I'm also on day 15 but my cycle on Clomid last month was 34 days and the scan showed that I probably ovulated on day 19 or 20.  So things happen a bit slower for me.  I have started to feel some slight tibgles in my boobs and ovary twinges  but I expect this to get much stronger around my ovulation - last month I was in agony! I'm so senstive to every twinge and niggle in my body its annoying!  I also ate loads over xmas and am looking forward to my dance classes starting again, although last term I hardly got to any as I was ill so much! 

I really hope that your 2ww isn't too stressful and ends in some positive news!  I'm here for chats!

Vicster
xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

duh, I'm being thick.  The blood test is of course to check your progestrone and that you've ovulated. 
My hospital must be stingy as they didn't do this blood test on my tracked natural or 1st clomid cycle.  I had one in initially which was fine and I suppose I must ovulate as I've conceived twice, so may be that is why they aren't bothering.
xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

How are you doing Sarah?
I was thinking on the way to work this morning how lovely the picture is of your man and dog!


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi good morning all,

Just a really quick one,

Vicster I have just noticed that I've been spelling your name wrong  

How rude of me  , sorry will spell it correctly from now  

Have a good day everyone,

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello everyone, hope you've had a good weekend.
I'm not too bad, although got a bit upset this morning as the pressure is getting to dh.  He's angry that it is becoming such hard work for us and jealous of those for who it is so easy.  It all became too much for him today which resulted in not the most successful BMS!! Oh well, there's always tomorrow! It's just so hard to fit everything in sometimes, especially as he works all kinds of hours!
Anyway, I'm not sure whether my follicle has popped but if it is the same as last time I'll be on my 2ww starting Monday or Tuesday.  Does anyone know if it usually stays the same clomid cycle to clomid cycle?
How's it going for everyone?

By for now
Love Vicster
Sarah - don't worry about the spelling of my name!!


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Sarah, Vicci & Vicster anyone else reading too 

I had a great weekend at work!! I work at the airport and all weekend it seemed that people were leaning over the desk and coughing and sneezing in my face, at one point on Sunday I was getting really mad   I'll have to wait and see if the bug gets me now, sorry for the moan....

Vicster, hope you're feeling a bit better now and enjoying the   last month I feet like I was nagging my DH  for  but this time round, I don't know what was going as he's nagging me for it, must of been his New Years resolution!!

I'm up and about this morning have to go for the 21d blood test before lunch, have to go on Thurs morning too, just to make sure they get an accurate reading.

Last cycle my 21d test results were only 20.6 so really hoping for something over 30 please,  

Hope you all have a good day, I'll talk to you soon, take care

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello!  Hust a quick one as I really must get to bed.  Hope the test results were ok.

Lots of hugs
Vicster
x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Its sooooo cold today, I'm freezing.

Hi only me,

Just got back from hospital, I'm quite depressed, sad and   

Do you ever think what the hell is wrong with me, why can't I just be normal, I'm   offed

My cd21 blood test result was not good, even lower than last month, I have had another test today but I don't think it'll be much better.

My consultant said we'll wait and see what happens but I think next month my dose is going to be upped to 100mg.

I don't even want to tell my DH when he phones at lunch time, at the moment I'm just feeling like a bit of a failure  

On a positive note, I'm going over to see my best friend in N Ireland on Sat for a few days so hopefully my mind will be taken off all this for a few days,

Hope you are keeping well and all is good?

I'll talk to you soon I'm off to work.

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Susan,

I'm so sorry to hear that your blood test results weren't good.   I totally sympathise with you feeling angry, sad and depressed.  It is so hard to accept that our bodies won't do what we want them to do and give us what we so long for.  Hopefully you will feel a bit better once the consultant decides what the next step is.  It seems like there is still alot of hope for you but I know what an up and down journey this is. I'm thining of you and sending you lots of positive vibes (very hippy!)

Spending time with your best friend sounds like a great plan and I hope it lifts your spirits.  

As for me, well I'm ok.  As you know, I don't have the blood tests so am just waiting to see what happens.  Apart from a cold, my body feels quite "normal" at the moment.  My doctor told me recently that women often get ill around ovulation time as the body lowere its immune system to prepare for a baby which it initially sees as a foreign body. 

Anyway, I better go as I;ve got to write an essay (the thought of which makes me feel sick!).  When we started trying, I got myself a stress free job with maternity benefits and planned to stay just while I popped some babies out before doing something more up my street.  Realising it wasn't going to be that easy for me, i decided that I better do something for myself so that I can eventually get a job that I'm more passionate about, so started an evening course.  Would much rather be thinking about nappies etc and find it hard to stay motivated at times but c'est la vie.

Bye for now

Thinking of you.
Love Vicster


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi ladies,

I'm back from my weekend away, so just thought I'd drop you a line or two before I have to go to work 

How have you been keeping? I hope you are all well?

My DH has gone away with work for two weeks and taken the laptop   , I'm not used to coming upstairs and sitting on the PC in the spare room, just lazy I know  

Love to hear from you soon,

Take care Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Susan,
Lovely to hear from you.  I hope you had a great time away.  
As you have probably seen from my other posts, I got a bit panicked the other day about my follie size and today I feel like I'm really losing it.  I've alwassy had really bad pmt and it is even worse on Clomid.  It started today and I feel awful and like I want to shout a everyone, or curle up in a ball and cry my eyes out.  I hate the fact that af and pregancy symptoms are exactly the same for me - as I;m more used to getting af, I'm convinced it is that but I'm not due for another week so will have to wait - I'm so impatient, I hate waiting!
I had the most horrid dreams last night about my firend who had her baby before xmas (when my first one would have been due).  She was in turmoil as she had postnatal depression and it was horrible to watch and I didn't know how to support her - I wanted to but at the same time I felt so jealous that I didn't have a baby too.  Dreams are weird and so real  sometimes they can really affect your mood for the day- ugh, don't like!
Oh I really can't bear another week of these sypmtoms and waiting but at least chatting to you lovely ladies wll help!
How are you doing?  
Are you looking forward to having a quiet couple of weeks with dh?!  My dh never goes away, although he may in the future when his band gets to go on tour!  Don't know how I'd cope with that - I get so lonely! Might have to go with him!
xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vicster,

I had a great time away it was nice and relaxing!!
I ate far too much food though!! I'm hoping to loose a couple of lbs while DH is away, but I've only got one week left then he's home, it's gone so fast, I'm missing him but glad he's away for his sake really, as I can be a bit of a dragon to him when AF is here and I'm pretty sure it's on the way.

Weird isn't it when I'm waiting for AF to arrive it takes what seems to be forever, I'm like you I suppose just can't wait that time, well if AF is gonna arrive it should be here in the next couple of days  

Dreams are strange hey! last night I dreamt of that woman from Big Brother, Shilpa VERY STRANGE  I can't remember what it was about but I know she was in it 

I've just been to the dentist this morning for a check up all is good   (nice teeth)

I'll talk to you soon

Take care Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Susan, great to hear from you!  I really feel comforted having people like you to talk to!

I'm glad you had a good time with your friend.  Yeah, this waiting game is so slow.  I'm trying to keep busy to take my mind off things and have got lots of lovely things planned for this weekend.

Talking of dreams.......
My dh punched me on the lip in his sleep last night!!!!!  He was dreaming that he was a Ninja in the Royal Marines, fighting the enemy!  It made me jump so much and made me cry as I ws half asleep and in shock!  There's not too much damage though and we keep laughing about it now!!!

Anyway, better go.  We're off to the cinema tonight to see Babel - lots of eye candy in the form of Brad Pitt and that Spanish guy (can't remember his name!)!

Take care of yourself.  When you going to test?
Vicster xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

I hope you are having a lovely time out with you DH?

I went to the cinema last week when I was away at my friends, we watched persuit of happiness, I cried most of they way through it, not just little tears running down my cheeks, but the crying that gives you a really sore throat and I just couldn't controll it, I'm sure the whole cinema could hear me!!  

Well as you know AF is due tomorrow, which is great as I'm working nearly all day, My handbag is prepped and ready incase the  does appear.

I haven't really had any signs of AF my boobs are a bit tender thats it really.

I'm not really expecting a   this month as my blood test results were not good, but I suppose there is a tiny glimmer of hope there as my consultant still hasn't phoned me with the second lot of results which were taken two days later  so I really don't know!!

         

           

        

Got everything crossed for us  (and everyone else too)

Take care, talk to you soon

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

He Susan.  Well AF has just arrived and I've been balling my eyes out.  

I feel like I'm never going to get pregnant again right now and i'm feeling upset again about the little beans I lost.  

Right, let's try and be positive about it - this af has come on day 32 which means that maybe the follicle popped earlier than last time.  It also means that I don't have to spend the next 2 days knicker checking!  
Ahh, we had soo much bms at the right time too!!  How annoying!!
Well, better get ready for lots more!  DH is being really sweet, giving me hugs and reassuring me that there's still hope and that he;s ready for lots more bms!!.

How are you today?  Hope af stays away for you and you get a bfp!! If af does come and your dh is still away, I'll send you lots of virtual hugs!

Hey, ho.  I better go and sort myself out - me and my brother are taking my mum out for her 60th today!

Love Vicster xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vicster,

Soooo sooooo sorry the wicked  arrived today   

I've just popped home from work for a few hours, finished at 5pm, but I have to go back in for around 8pm ish, there are two more flights coming in that I have to see to, could really do without it but never mind.

My AF hasn't turned up yet but boobs are really quite sore now, I'll wait for another couple of days before I test. 

   to your mum, how nice of you and your bro to take her out.

Your DH sounds very lovely and caring, it's nice to get lots of hugs, I love them 

I'm getting a twinge in my tummy just now, really sure AF is gonna be here very soon, I'm knicker watching and I hate it.

Thanks for the offer of the virtual hugs, def gonna take you up on that one  

I better go and get sorted, talk to you very soon.

Its great to see you thinking   

Love Susan


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,

How are you today?  We had a lovely time with my mum yesterday.  I'm feeling dreadful today, like all the energy has been sucked out of me, and my af is really painful.  I can't bear to see another pregnant woman smoking (I work next door to a hospital and see loads of them!)  or hearing yet another person we know is pregnant.  I just wanna hibernate right now!

Which airport do you work at?  

Hope your tummy twinges are a sign of something good and not the af!

Love Vicster
x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello lovely ladies, I have been away for 2 weeks on holiday so haven't been online for a while, Vicster I'm glad you like the pic of DH (Mark) and dog (Stilton!)  Hope you're feeling better today, really sorry to hear the   turned up... mine turned up too half way thru holiday    I'm not feeling too well either - have a cold which is trying to get worse but I refuse to let it - got a nasty headache this morning too... could be worse though, poor old DH is still in bed at home with a broken rib (from skiing hol) and an abscess on his bum!  Bless him.  Anyway this month just finished was my last month of clomid so I don't know what on earth we are going to do next - feel in a panic about running out of time    I am looking into IVM in Denmark which apparently costs less than IVF and uses less drugs.  DH and I were going to see if we could afford Mr Taranissi but after all the hoo hah I'm not sure what to do.

Anyway, Susan I hope your  has still not turned up and Vicster I'm sending you a   - don't give up - we will get there one way or another, we've just got to try and be patient.

Take care both of you,

lots of love Sarah xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

Welcome back Sarah I hope you had a lovely holiday apart from the   Turing up and your poor DH breaking his ribs ouchhhh, hope he is feeling better soon. Hope your cold is going away too.

Vicster- Hope AF has eased off now and not so painful for you.

I have to say I totally agree with you on the whole smoking front, it's disgusting and even more disgusting especially if you are with child, how could people poison there unborn child!! 
but then each to their own I suppose (I would never dream of doing it if I was)

I work at Inverness airport, yep thats right I'm at the very top of Scotland in the highlands,
I'm not Scottish I'm from Wiltshire but had to move up here because of my DH's job, we have been here for nearly 4 years now and are due to move again in the summer back to england Shropshire I think.
I really like it up here though it's sooo beautiful and the people are very nice.

Guess what still no AF I'm going   I really want to go and get a test but something keeps saying no just hold on, DH is home tomorrow night so might wait until then so we can do it together, thats if nothing happens between now and tomorrow.
I keep walking past them in the shop and wantinf to pick one up!!!

I'll let you know as soon as, I'm on CD37 now and last month was a 33 

Talk to you soon

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi ladies, just a quickie - Susan - DON'T TEST!        try to hang in there till DH gets home, I honestly think it's better if they're with you, whatever the result  

We did have a lovely holiday thanks, really wish we could go again now!    Anyway spring seems to be on its way today, the sun is shining down here in suffolk, hooray!  

By the way I totally agree with both of you about pg women smoking    It makes me    !

Really keeping fingers crossed for you Susan, and hope you are feeling better today Vicster.

Take care both of you

Sarah xx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi girlies,
Glad you had a good time skiing Sarah - sorry to hear af got you too! And your poor dh!
Susan - all sound very promising!  Lets hope so!  I agree it is probably best to wait until tomorrow to test so you are with dh but I know how difficult it is not too!

Have been moping around the last couple of days feeling sorry for myself in a Clomid haze!  AF was really heavy.

Starting to feel better today and then me and dh discover an unopened letter from his urologist!  Not great news  - his sample was pretty much the same as before and so the urologist wants him to take some drugs and then see him in JUne.  I hate getting letters - not enough explanation and you can't ask questions!  So I'm panikcing now as I've never heard of drug treatment to help improve things for men.  Have you?  I just googled it and all I could find was that drug treatment doesn't help very much all!!?

  Starting to think that ivf or something is going to be the only way/

Hope you two lovelies are feeling more positive
xx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi ladies, hope you are OK Susan and that you haven't tested and that  is still at bay!

Vicster, I know what you mean about getting letters - very frustrating, they never tell you anything much.  I have never heard of drugs for   quality, do you know what is wrong with your DH's?  My DH has lots of them but most of them are funny shaped    he has been on all sorts of vitamin and mineral supplements since about March last year, but he hasn't had a SA since June 06, they had improved quite a bit but still not to normal levels.  He was going to do a third SA when we got back from hols but now he is on so many antibiotics and painkillers we have decided to wait a couple of months as they'll probably all be completely stoned and not swimming at all!

I know what you mean about starting to think IVF is the only way - scary isn't it?   but we've got to think positive.      I hope you're feeling much better now, just think the clomid haze is only for a couple more days then you'll be back to normal. Till then, have a hug on me   

Must get on with some work now as am feeling like a right slacker.

Take care both of you 
xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Sarah,

Hope your dh is getting better.  

My dh's first SA had loads of   but not of great quality (speed or shape)
The second SA showed slightly better quality (just below average) but the quantity was down significantly.  We have to write a letter to the consultant to get the results written down.

The drug he is being given is Tamoxifen which is an anti-oestrogen drug more commonly given to women with breast cancer and men with man boobs (dh is going to love that when I tell him!)
All the research I've done so far on the internet is not very promising.  For example, the headline of one study is "Anti-oestrogen therapy doesn't work in male infertility"  - great!


Well, I spose they can't be all that bad cos we have managed to get preggers but right now it seems like we;ve both got slight problems and either we have another problem which causes the miscarriages or its just that we are unlucky!

Right, musn't start feeling sorry for myself!!

Thanks for the hugs.  Hope you are feeling alright and not too stressed about the ivf decision.

Sending you lots of  
Vicster
x


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi sorry for the delay in posting.

Just to update     for me 

Really strange my cycle this month was 41 days!!! last month 33 days so to say I was on edge was an understatement.

I'm thinking that I'm going to be on 100mg this time round, but can't get hold of the person I need to.

I'm sat in waiting for the phone to ring to say yes go ahead and get the tablets.

I'm worried that I'm not gonna get a call and then I wont know what to do, I need to get the tabs today so I can start taking them tomorrow, if not then I really don't know what to do.

Well I hope you are all OK.

I'll chat again soon when I know whats going on.

Take care Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls,

Thanks for your reply Vicster, DH is gradually getting better bless him.

Your bit about the man boobs really made me laugh    Try not to worry too much, like you said you have managed to get preggers before so you and DH must be mostly OK, it was probably just bad luck which doesn't mean you won't be lucky in the future!

Thanks for the hugs, I am just trying to concentrate on losing weight at the moment to give the IVF the best possible chance when we finally get round to it!


Hi Susan, sorry to hear you got a  .  Try not to be too down, I really hope you get your phone call soon so that you can get on with the next lot of tablets and have another go!  

Lots of love,

Sarah xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi again,

Just a quick one,

Sarah I noticed the thread about the bubbles didn't want to intrude on there so I sent you some from this one  

Vicster, sent you some too my love   

Well still no call, so DH and I have decided to stick with the 50mg dose this try, as we don't want to waste a month with no medication at all.

So start taking the pills tomorrow  

Goodnight, talk soon,

Susan xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hope you are all OK?

Just a quick update,

I'm on CD4 at the moment and took my first dose of 100mg clomid last night 9pm, no side effects so far!!!!

The person who I was waiting for a phone call from has been off work with the flu, luckily I got a call yesterday left a message and said it was OK to go up to 100mg.

So glad I got a call when I did as I needed to start taking the pill last night 

Hope to chat v soon, hope your cycles are going well.

Take Care Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

hello my lovelies,

Hope you are OK Vicster?

Thanks for the bubbles Susan   

Really glad you are not having any side effects on the 100mg!  Apparently it really helps to take the tablets at night.

I haven't got any news (except I have lost 3.5lb this week, hurrah) - did you see that AngelMoon got a  on her first month of clomid?  What a result!

Take care both of you and hope you both have a lovely weekend

love Sarah xx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey girlies, 

I haven't been online for a while as I've had a really busy week - work and play! 

Susan -so sorry to hear that you had such a long drawn out wait and no bfp.  And then to have to wait for that phone call - ugh, all that waiting!!
Glad they got back to you in time to start the higher dose - fingers crossed it will work for you.

Thanks so much both of you for the bubbles - it's so comforting knowing that there are understanding people thinking of each other around the UK!

I saw my consultant on Tuesday who confirmed that the dose I'm on is the right one (was worried my follies were getting too big) and that if we do decide to get some private treatment, ivf would be the thing to do with the way dh's swimmers are.  Hmm, alot to think about as sooo expensive and would mean borrowing money! But our patience is really running out!!  Sarah - have you found out anything more about IVM??

We've also found out a bit more about Tamoxifen which the urologist wants to put dh on.  BAsically, our gp won't prescibe it as its not licensed for male subfertility treatment and she doesn't want to risk getting sued if anything happens, so she's asked the urologist to see us. She reckons he was well out of order to just write a letter.  Makes us very worried about taking it! I've put a thread on the male factor board to see if anyone else has experience of it and have found no-one! Dh is feeling very down about the whole thing and feels a failure - he's usually so upbeat and happy and I find it so hard when he's down and have been doing silly things to try and cheer him up!  Have advised him to go on the male room here but he hasn't so far.

In the mean time, I'm trying to enjoy life which is much easier for me at this time of the cycle before the progestrone hormones get me!  This lot of clomid wasn't too bad - hope the side effects keep at bay Susan!  HAve been to lots of cultural events this week and am going to Bristol to stay with friends this weekend - can't wait!

Better go...

Lots of huggles to you both   

Love Vicster

Sarah - how is dh?


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello Vicster you daft bird   to you too  

I haven't found anything more out about IVM yet, I am waiting for some info from the John Radcliffe in Oxford which is the only place in England which offers it but I don't hold out much hope as you have to be under 36 (which I only am for another 5 weeks!) and have PCOS.  I did get in touch with a clinic in Denmark of all places but they haven't replied yet.  Grrr.

Your poor DH bless his heart, I have tried to persuade mine to go to the male room too but he hasn't yet, men are different to us aren't they? (apart from the obvious I mean!    )  My DH was really down when we had his first sperm analysis, he felt really useless and I just couldn't make him feel better but he has got more over it now although I think it still makes him feel bad sometimes.  He is a lot better now thanks, the giant pus-bum   has gone down a lot and he is hopefully going back to work on Monday.  Sadly though his gran died on Wednesday, she was really old and had been ill for ages but it is still really sad for him, poor old boy  

Anyway, I hope you have a lovely weekend in Bristol, have a great time. 

Take care both of you,

Sarah xx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Morning ladies, I hope you are both ok?

Sarah- well done for the weight losss, you'll have to let me know what you did, (I'd love to shift half a stone or so) it's stuck on since Christmas and wont budge!!

Vicster- hope you had a really grate time away in Bristol?

DH has gone to E


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Sorry about that, my message decided to post itself!!!! could be something to do with the long sleeves I've go on! I didn't even get chance to spell check!!

As I was saying DH has gone to England for work, he'll be back tomorrow though 

I have finished taking the clomid now, last night was the last dose, no SE at all!!

I'm feeling a bit yuckie today though, I have to go for a scan on Thurs/Fri so I'll let you know how that gets on   

Hope to chat soon

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Susan, your post really made me laugh     the bit about the long sleeves

Glad you didn't have any clomid s/e at all, that's brill!  Fingers crossed for the scan for you.

I am doing the Weigh Watchers plan, it's good I have lost loads on it before, wish I only had half a stone to lose!

Hope you are OK Vicster  

Can't type much now, boss is in  

Take care,

love Sarah xx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hellooee,

Just a quick one as doing a sneaky at work!

Glad you are both doing ok and Sarah well done from me too for the weight loss.  I'm lucky that I don't have to watch my weight  and can imagine it must be a real pain. 

I had a lovely time in Bristol chilling with our friends.  They've just started on the baby making journey and as she has endo have been told it might be quite difficult, so I was able to share my experiences so far with her which she found helpful.  

Anyway, I better get back to work.  Where do you work Sarah?

Lots of love and   for this cycle.

Vicx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, glad you are OK and that you had a good time in Bristol    You are lucky not to have to watch your weight!  It must be lovely to be slim all the time.  I work for the NSPCC - probably shouldn't spend so much time on FF but it makes me feel so much better... and I do work hard too when I'm here  

love Sarah xx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey you two,

how's it going?  Hope your scans are showing positive happenings Susan!  How's your cycle Sarah now you are au naturelle? And dh's backside??!

I'm doing ok.  Have had loads of gigs and dance performances to go to so that has kept me amused and happy.
I think I felt some ovulation happening the other day so that's good.  I'm trying to not think about it too much though cos I feel like if I imagine it all happening it won't! Mind you, in her book Zita West advocates visualisation, so who knows.  I just don't like the disappointment when things don't work out

Am managing not to let things get me down too much at the mo  - even witnessing a woman giving birth in the foyer of the hospital on my way into work this morning - the second time I have seen this happen!! Poor woman having to do something so private in public!!!  The joys of working at a hospital! (actually I  work for the Uni attached to the hospital)

Anyway, better go

Love vicster
x


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi everone,

Hope you are both OK?  

Vicster, wow what an eventful time you've been having, glad it's keeping you happy 

          positive vibes coming  both your ways for this month, hope the pains were a v good sign, time to      

I'm on day 12 at the mo, had a lovely internal scan yesterday morning.

It showed that I had two bigish follies on the right had side, the left one a few medium ones and some fluid around them  

I asked what this was and was told it was just because my ovaries were working very hard now that I've gone up to 100mg clomid, but this can make you feel sick.

Anyway I have to go back on Monday and have another scan done, just tracking the growth over the weekend  so please, please grow lovely and big so I ov this month.

All is good with me, I have the weekend off work thank goodness, so just going to relax and enjoy!

Hope you are bot well and I'll talk to you both very soon,

Take Care Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey clomid chums!


Am doing a sneaky at work and am writing this as a word doc and then cutting and pasting so no smilies today I'm afraid!
Susan:  Cool!  It sounds like your little ovaries are working flat out and will hopefully produce a nice healthy egg which your dh's swimmers would love to meet!

Sarah:  how's things?

I've kind of convinced myself that it hasn't worked again this time as I've been getting tummy ache, back ache and yesterday turned into Mrs Cazy Woman! We went to the Comedt Store last night for dh's birthday (actual b'day this Tuesday) to see the Comedy store players which is the improvisation night
(like Who's Line is it Anyway - remember that?).  Paul Merton was one of the performers so it was hilarious, especially seeing him do an impression of a woman with pmt and of a dancing daschound (spelling??!) dog!  Haven't laughed that much in ages!!  At the start though I had a go at the bouncer and some people who tried to steal our seats - was feeling very feisty and hormonal!

I'm worrying that maybe I've been going out too much but I spose it it hasn't made a difference in the past when I've stayed in - there seems to be no sense in this baby making game, or in the whole of life for that matter!!! But it's always at the back of my mind that it is somehow my fault.

Anyway, I better go

Looking forward to hearing from you soon

Love Vicster
xxx  hugs, bubbles, positive vibes etc ......xxxxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi hope you are all OK?

How are you feeling Vicster, have the tummy aches gone now?
I really am sending you lots of    vibes, remember it's not over till the   arrives so           Sarah too.

Sarah I love your new signature, you are clever, I take it thats your cats? 
I have a golden retriever called Honey and a cat called Twinkle, they are my babies. Oh I must not forget the fish!!!
I have tried on many occasions to get one of those ticker things, I can copy and paste OK but I must be putting it in the wrong box because it never appears, so I give up now   

I'm on CD17 I had a scan on Monday which saw 3 biggish follies so fingers crossed, I have to go for my bloods on Mon CD21 so hopefully I'll get a result over 30 this time.

4 more days at work then I'm on hols   , not going anywhere but my little sister and her boyfriend are coming to stay for a few days.

Take care love

Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Susan, good to hear from you.


Good news that you have a few follies so lots of    .  My fingers are crossed for you.

My tummy and back are worse today.  It feels like   is about to come any moment and it isn't even due until next Wednesday (am on CD25)!!!!!

In fact, I'm feeling so pants   that I can't concentrate on the reading I'm meant to be doing for my course and may have to hit the sack.  Feel like I could cry  .  I can't bear the thought of  again. Sigh, the hormones are really getting to me.  I'm trying to think  positive honest cos like you said don't giev up hope until af actually arrrives.  Thing is, I've been looking back at my diary for when I got preggers before and although I had lots of pmt symptoms I didn't note backache and that's what I've got now and had the last couple of months.  Sorry, this is turning into a moanfest!  

Anyway, I have some updates on our treatment situation......Saw the main GP on Tuesday who was excellent.  She's referring us privately to Hammersmith and I can get the consultation and any further tests for me funded by the "friendly society" insurance thingy that I belong to.  Am kicking myself though cos I thought that dh was automatically covered but I should have registered him when we got married - what an  I am!  

Doc is also doing an antibody blood test on me cos of my miscarriages and some hormone tests again -She didn't sound very pleased with what my nhs hospital has been doing!  So am pleased that we are going to get a second opinion especially as dh's latest set of results are even worse than previous ones.


Well, am off now.

How are you doing Sarah?

I've got a cat too - Didi - she's cool and I love her heaps!! 

Lots of     and  to you both
xx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ahhh hun sending you a big   sorry you are feeling down..the news re your Dr's/hospital sounds very positive though.. wishing you lots of             and bash the           maybe if I bash her she won't arrive    ... b*tch of a witch ! 

Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Thanksfor the message sweetie, it made me smile! 
I'll start bashing your  too so she doesn't rear her ugly head!

Sending you


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

good glad it made you smile hun    keep on   
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi my friends,

This is just a quick one as I need to get some shut eye but just wanted to send you all lots of    
and      
Lets hopw we get some    soon!

Hope you are having a fun weekend!

Love Vicster


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

Just a quick one to say hi, hope you had a grate w/end.

Wow a few     on here over the w/end, it's made me so happy to see them  

I'm off to pick my little sis and her b/friend up from Aberdeen today (a long drive )

I'll catch up v soon

Happy Monday

Lots of love and    

Susan xxx

heres my contrabution to the lucky dance everyone is doing


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

again

just an update 

CD21 today got to go and have a blood test done soon

susan xxx


----------



## Rosie P (Nov 10, 2005)

Good luck with your blood test Susan.  

Rosie. xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Thanks Rosie,

Hopefully I'll get a result over 30 this month (3rd time lucky)   

Should get a call tomorrow, fingers crossed.

Take care everyone

Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Susan and everyone,

Hope you're having a lovely time with your lil sis and her man.

My fingers are crossed for you to get a good result 

Did you have a good Xmas party?? 

I'm off work today with virusy symtoms plus pmt, nausea and tummy pains (sigh). I dreamt that I did a pregnancy test which showed positive and woke up feeling extremely pregnant - but I know from the past two months not to get my hopes up!!  Anway I'm not going to spend the day feeling sorry for myself so am going to rest and watch Sex in the City Dvds!

My brother has suggested that we all (me, dh, his girl, ma and pa) go on hols together this year and chip in to get a nice villa, probably Sardinia.  I love going away with my folks (they are a laff and we get on brilliantly!) and the villas look lush so that's something to look forward to!! ("lush"- haben't used that word for a while!!)

Bye bye for now

vicster


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello lovely ladies!  I have been off for a while having various nightmares at home (and work) but things are calming down a bit now thank goodness.

Sorry to hear you are poorly Vicster  hope you soon feel better and enjoy the Sex & the City DVDs you lucky thing!    Wish I could come over and veg out with you!   Glad to hear you are getting a second opinion by the way, it all sounds very positive.  Fingers crossed!

Susan I really hope your test results are good, I have got everything crossed for you today too (except legs - its that  time again!)  With the ticker thing by the way you have to make sure you copy the right code (ie the bulletin board one) and then you just paste it into your signature box on the profile page, if that's any help?

 Cat and Rosie (are you the same Rosie who used to have a picture taken in Bali?  If so, hi, nice to see you again!)

Sarah xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Sarah, lovely to hear from you.  

Sorry to hear things have been hectic.  Is your dh feeling better now?

I so hope that your   leads to a little bean.  My fingers and legs are crossed for you!!!!



Vicster
xx


----------



## Rosie P (Nov 10, 2005)

Hi Sarah. Yes, that's me  . I always get confused as I'm so bad with names so I remember people by their pictures. Then when someone changes it it sends me    

Hope things are getting better for you at home and at work.

Rosie. xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls

Thanks Rosie, things are getting better now.    Re your other post - next week will be here before you know it   hang in there and stay  

Hi Vicster, DH is feeling pretty much OK again now, but still occasionally suffering side effects from all the antibiotics he had to take for his abscess, poor old chap.  Thanks for the bean wishes!  We will do our best  

Susan - hope you are OK hun


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hello Everyone.

Sarah / Vicster hope you are both keeping well and feeling much better.

I had a good Christmas party thanks, it seems such a long time ago!

Sarah thanks for the tips on the ticker - it worked!! thanks, I'm   sometimes.

Well, hope the   hasn't turned up yet for any of you lovely ladies.

       

My little sis and her b/friend have gone now I took them back yesterday  !!!

I'll chat again later I must get up and get motivated.

Take care all.

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Susan, love your ticker!    Glad to see you're OK.

Hope you're feeling better now Vicster  

Everybody -  have a great weekend xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello mateys,

Haven't been here for a while as work was very busy and internet was down at home (dh was going crazy  !!)

Susan- glad the party was fun and that you hada  nice time with your sis.  What did you get up to? How wre your blood results?  Good I hope   . Lets hope that the extra dose of clomid will do the trick and make your ovaries   and  hard!

Sarah - glad dh's rear end is better! Antibiotics can be nasty! Any news on your next course of action?  Hiopefully things will happen au naturelle for you  .  What are you up to this weekend?

As for me, well I'm feeling happy and scared as I got a bfp this morning!! I feel like I should keep quiet about it as its early days and I'm really worried that it will leave me like the other beans.  I hope you don't mind me hanging around chatting () as I really value our chats and the support you give me - I'm a very anxious person who needs alot of reassurance ! As if you haven't guessed that already!  I sooo hope that you join me in bfp land soon.

Lots of Love
  
vicsterxx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vicster I have just seen this, wooooooow yippee, I'm soooooo happy for you and your DH, I started   when I read it.

I'm sending you lots of      

As you can see from my new ticker I'm on CD26, clovers as DH is from N.ireland and they are lucky.

I woke up this morning feeling all achy and pmt ish so I'm really praying that the   isn't on her way, you'll have to   her for me  

My cons told me that if my blood test result wasn't over 30 she would call me to go in for another test but I haven't had a call so I'm really hoping that it was over 30 and I did OV this month.

dance......                       

When my sis was here we went into town, had a lovely meal, played bingo (her b/friend won over £200!), went to the cinema, it was very had for me as she is 17 and likes to do different things to me so I was always on the go, but still it was lovely to see her and her b/friend is v nice.

Vicster what CD were you on when you got your   have you been feeling any different?

You'll have to stay and chat with us I'd   too much if you left.

      

All the best for the next 8 months or so I'm really so happy for you.

Lots of love Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Susan,

Your new ticker is cool!!

I will indeed bash  the  for you.  Here goes.......

        

Hope that helps!!!  Sounds promising about your bloods.  

Remember that for many women af and pregnancy symptoms are exactly the same. 

I really felt like af was on her way!! I tested on day 35 and reckon I ovulated around day 18.  I am waking up very early with nausea and feeling pretty knackerd which I also felt last month when I got my af. Now I know I'm pregnant though, i really feel it.  I'd quite like not to think about it cos I'm so sacred of another m/c, but that's pretty impossible!  Am just trying to chill and not let the anxiety get the better of me.   Wow, so many hurdles to jump in this baby making game!  I know I'm very lucky to get to this stage again so I can't complain!

Glad you had fun with your sis.    I've only played Bingo once and found it really hard to keep up!   Not very good at seeing the numbers!! It was so fast paced and full of "pro's" with their tins of biccies and flasks of tea!!  Lucky him to win £200!  

Well, as usual I'm skiving from writing my essay (only 2 more to go and then I never want to write another one again in my whole life!!)

Sending you lots of  back
and a million   for this cycle.

Sarah - how are you doing chick?

Hi anyone else

Love
Vicster
xx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vicster as always hunny   ... Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

OMG Vicster!  I have just read your post and my chin literally nearly hit my keyboard!      I am SO pleased that you have got your  and I really really hope the bean stays with you             I know it's a daft thing to say but TRY not to be too anxious!  Apparently if it helps Zita West recommends that you "talk" to the baby right from the beginning and tell it how much it is wanted and welcomed... keep in touch with us!

Hi Susan - really hoping the  doesn't turn up for you - I am   ing her too!

I have got an appointment with an NHS consultant to see what we're going to do next - my cycle seems regular etc so I really think it's either down to my age and the fact that I smoked heavily from when I was 15 to when I was 30 and maybe I've knackered all my eggs   or it's down to DH's swimmers, or a combination of both....

 to Cat and anyone else...

Sarah xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Sarah,

I was so shocked too as dh's last results were so poor!  Just goes to show that it only takes one good one.
I'm glad things are moving for you and that you've got an appointment with your consultant.  It is so annoying when you just can't work out why it is not happening and it is only natural to blame what you have/haven't done.  But as you know, life is unfair and there just doesn't seem reason to many things. I really doubt it has anything to do with your smoking so don't beat yourself up, and the fact that your cycles are regular is a good sign. Its easy for me to be all positive now about getting a bfp cos I've got one, but I totally haven't forgotten the pain and worry that it may never happen and still feel like it might not.xx

oops beter go somoen has just dsturbed me
Thanks for the Zita West tip - I think I might try it!

Sending you both lots of positive vibes and cuddles


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Awww, thanks Vicster.  Hope all is well with you today...    Your  has really given me hope as, as you know, my DH has   issues too...  I have just noticed you are a Piscean too, when's your birthday?  Get chatting to that little bean missy...  I have everything crossed for you that he/she stays this time


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Morning!! 

I'm glad my good news has given you hope 

How do you know I'm a Piscean??  

Pisceans rock!   My birthday is the 11 March, so in a couple of weeks.  Yours?  What are you going to do?  My folks are coming up to London and we're all going to go to my favourite Turkish restaurant - yum!  I  might do something with my friends as well (good excuse to get everyone together!) but dunno what yet.

I talked to the bean on the way to work.  Had to convince it that it is worth staying even though its father can be annoying sometimes - he really stressed me out this morning cos he's soo disorganised and started blaming it all on me! !  Ah - how dare he, in my condition!!!  I'm probably being over sensitive!

Anyway, must dash..

Susan - how are you sweetie?

Take care everyone.  

Vicx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, there are new starsign icons under everybody's profile as of this morning - Susan pointed them out on the "something to smile about" thread!  Did you think I was stalking you or something?  

My birthday is on the 8th, DH is taking me to a posh hotel for the night - woo hoo!  We stayed there on our wedding night too, it's lovely and right by the sea, can't wait!  Turkish restaruant sounds good - I've never tried Turkish food, what's it like?

Glad to hear you've been talking to the bean   keep up the good work hun

Susan - hope you're OK today?  

Right, I'm off back to the boring grindstone  

love sarah xx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hope you are both having a good day? apart from the rain 

I should really say, how are the three of you doing   

Vicster how have you been keeping? When you are next talking to your bean, tell the little one that I say hiya.
How are the pregnancy symptoms- have you any cravings yet? 

CD29 for me, really sore (.)(.) and tummy twinges  

Chat later, have to go and phone for new car insurance!!

Take care all

Susan xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

HI,

Sarah,

Good luck with your appointment tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you.

Lots of    for a   outcome.

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Susan - thanks honey!  I am really hoping that your sore (.)(.) is a sign of a  on the way!  I have got everything crossed for you 

Vicster - say hi to the little bean from me too! 

love Sarah xx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Aww you two are so sweet!  .  Thanks heaps for your support.  

Yeah Susan lets hope those are bfp signs - could well be you know!!!   

Sarah - lucky you going to a posh hotel and how romantic being your wedding night one!  I'd quite like my dh to do the same for me!  Trouble is, the hotel was dead posh (in Kensington - we stayed in the venus room!!!) and dh only managed to afford it thanks to a generous aunt! Maybe one day!!
No I didn't think you were stalking me silly .  I guessed it was something obvious that I'd missed - I can be really unobservant sometimes!  . 
Turkish food is nice grilled fish or kebab style things with rice and nuts and spices.  The restuarant also has turkishlive music so should be entertaining.
Let us know how your appointment goes - I'll be thinking of you too  

Susan- My symptoms are sore (.)(.), tiredness and feeling incredibly nauseaus in the morning and occasionally later on.  As for cravings, well, as a veggie I'm ashamed to admit that I cooked and ate a steak last night!  
Actually, I have been eating fish for the last couple of years and did have a bit of bacon when I was pregnant before but before that I haven't had any other red meat since I was 13!!!!!  I did it on the sly as dh is quite a strict veggie and although he says he doesn't mind, I know he'd rather not know!    i really felt my body needed it and thoroughly enjoyed it but I'm not thinking too much about where it came from! 
Once I thought I was pregnant cos I was craving strawberries wrapped in bacon but that was a false alarm - must have been having a weird day!!  

Better go and feed the cat - she keeps eating the phone book to hint that she's hungry



Vicxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Baby bean 'Aunty Cat' says hello ...  I have this great image in my head now Vicster of your Cat eating the phone book..  

Strawberries wrapped in bacon def sounds like a pregnancy thing hun !! yuk! 

Hello everyone else   ..hope we get another big batch of   very soon  xxxx
Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello my lovelies  

Susan - are you OK?

Hi Cat - couldn't agree more about the big batch of  s!

Hi Vicster - your honeymoon hotel sounds amazing!  Your description of Turkish food sounds lovely, mmm, rice and nuts    Your cat sounds hilarious by the way  

DH and I saw the consultant on Wednesday, I couldn't log in until today because our home computer was kaput and I don't work on Wednesdays and Thursdays - anyway, I am now on the waiting list for a lap and dye which should happen some time in May or June, and apparently I can have IVF (paid for by us) any time after, you don't have to wait or anything.  So now we are researching clinics like mad and I am exercising like a nutter to try and get my weight down!  

Anyway better dash as have got lots of work to do and boss will be back soon,

Hope you all have a great weekend and Susan I am really hoping there will be no  for you          

love Sarah xxx


----------



## Mrs Hopeful (Sep 1, 2006)

Wow Vicster

Just seen this post I am soooooo happy for your   can't tell you how much.  Sending you loads of             and sticky vibes.

Congrats Again

Mrs Hopeful xxxxxxxxxxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

All you lovely ladies,  I hope you are all having a wonderful weekend and taking it easy!!

Just a quick one as I have to go back to work soon (yep on a Sunday night)

the   got me this morning so another    .

I'll catch up with you all very soon.

Take care, love Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Oh, Susan honey I'm so sorry the  got you.  Sending you lots of hugs   try and stay positive     and we will get our s one day 

Vicster and Cat   hope you are both ok

love Sarah


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Thanks Sarah  

Like my mum tells me, good things come to those that wait!!! (I don't want to wait)

Hope you are well?

Vicster, how's things? really hope all is going good   

I'll pop back later on  

Take care

Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi lovelies,

So sorry to hear about your BFN Susan - it is so hard being patient when you want something so bad.  Sending you lots of   for this cycle.

Sarah - glad things are moving along with your investigations.  Lots of   to you too.

I'm fine. Haven't been on here for a while as have been coming home from work, eating and then going straight to bed as I'm so exhausted!  Had to come home from work early today as went all dizzy and faint but of course I don't mind. Am still very anxious at times which is another reason why I haven't been on the internet as I'm avoiding the temptation of looking at anything to do with miscarriage!  So taking things day by day and being grateful for getting to this stage.

Each night I pray to whoever (as I'm not of a particular religion) that you guys will get your bfps soon.  

Anyway, I need to go to bed!  But first I think I'll have some bacon!

Happy Birthday Sarah for tomorrow!!  Hope you have a great time away.  

Hope you are ok Cat and thanks for the message Mrs H

Lots of love
Vicx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Vicster ..how are you feeling hun? I am feeling pretty sad as our donor (known donor) has suddenly started putting demands of £200 a go and to have a realistic chance of success I would need about 5 goes a cycle ..as I never ovulate when expected ..and the OPK's don't work !! so we have waved goodbye to our dream as just can't afford that..I am pretty devastated to be honest ..I cried myself to sleep only to be woken up by a loud bang and I knew straight away what it would be .. you probably remember me talking about my car being stolen ..well as my replacement car was alarmed and had a steering wheel lock ..they set fire to it instead .. so all in all having a sh*t time of it at the moment and really wonder when I will have some good luck. 

Hope you are well .. I think I will have to keep supporting you guys on here even if my dream is over ..cos you are such lovely people you deserve every happiness and I want to hear about it ..cos as sad as I am about my own situation I could never begrudge other people happiness and want to see you all with beautiful bouncing babies .. 
Cat x


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi everyone,

Firstly       Sarah, have a lovely day  

Cat, so sorry to hear you are going through such a rubbish time at the moment, I hope they get the scum bags      How could anyone do that, people out there are just  
As for your donor well £200 a time is a bit steep, especially if he's a so called friend!!!

Vicster, glad everything is going well and looking good   totally understand why you haven't been on here much but please don't keep away too much, as I said before we  
Keep up the good work   

I'm fine Mum, Dad and Little sis coming today as my uncle is getting married at the weekend, so we are all going off to the isle of Skye for that. I'm looking forward to seeing them as I haven't seen them since Christmas (not little sis, she was here two weeks ago)
 has nearly gone now and I can't wait as I've really been feeling like some   this past couple of days, sorry TMI but I know you all don't mind  

Better go and hoover,

Take Care, 
Susan xxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

ha ha Susan that made me laugh ..we don't mind at all hun   ..enjoy x


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Oh Cat, I can't  believe what a nightmare you have been having.    those wan**rs who destroyed your car!!!
And as for your donor, well that is very inconsiderate of him-its not like he has to go through any pain or anything .  Please don't give up on your dream.  You obviously want it so much and I so hope things fall into place for you.  It sounds like you have a great attitude to life in spite of your tragedies and that although you obviously feel so sad now, you will get through it and the right situation will happen for you to have a baby - I can feel it, even through cyberspace!. 

Hi Susan,
Glad you are feeling up for lots of jiggery pokery (as my dh calls it, hmm!!).  HAve a great time this weekend with your folks!


Happy birthday Sarah!!

Lots of love everyone
Vicster
x


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Vicster ..   its all this girl power on here that keeps me strong ..you lot inspire me to keep on fighting ..kick boxing here we come  
Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello lovelies

Cat, I'm so sorry to hear what a horrible time you have been having, you poor thing     I don't know what else to say really other than that I am thinking of you   and hoping so much that everything will work out for you in the end

Hi Susan, hope you are well and that your uncle's wedding went well and that you enjoyed lots of  

Hi Vicster, hope you and that little bean are still doing well    

I had a lovely birthday, it was really great and thanks for the happy birthday wishes.  Unfortunately I have been a bit   since then (the  turned up the day after and I seem to be taking it badly this month) and I have been comfort eating (not good when I've got so much weight to lose before IVF)  and not feeling like surfing but I am back on the FatFighters now   and feeling a bit more positive.

Hope you are all well and that you are feeling more cheery Cat and kicking some 

love Sarah xxx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi All,

Firstly sorry I haven't been on for a while, but I've been busy what with my parents coming to stay for a few days, my uncles wedding and DH being away and taking the laptop too   I've really been quite busy.

The wedding was so lovely, thankyou for asking Sarah, really special and in such a remote part of Scotland they have palm trees there!!!

Sorry the old hag   turned up for you Sarah  

I'm CD13 and haven't got a clue what is happening as I phoned my cons to get booked in for CD12 scan, you can never get through so I leave a message the the usually call me back to tell me when to pop in, but I've had no call as yet so I'm thinking that maybe she's on Hols??
So I think this month is just gonna be a guessing game, unless I get a call in the next couple of days, but still it's too late by then.

Take care all

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Susan,

I'm glad your uncle's wedding went well - palm trees in scotland?    sounds amazing!  sorry to hear you haven't been able to arrange your day 12 scan - you could try using opks this month if you could get some today?  Either way, make sure you get lots of !

Vicster and Cat   hope you are both OK...

Have a great weekend everybody (hope things are feeling a bit more rosy for you Cat)

Must go as am really busy at work today  


love Sarah xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi girls,

Hope you are all ok.

Unfortunately I have some sad news - I've had another miscarriage.  Feeling devastated and very angry. 

Will write again when I'm feeling a bit better

Lots of love
Vicx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Vicster,

I'm so,so sorry to hear your terrible news      

I can't even imagine how you are feeling, I want you to know that I'm thinking of you and your DH at this very sad time.

Take care Vic and I hope to talk to you soon.

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Oh Vicster I'm so so sorry darling        

I don't know what to say as I've never been in your situation but I just want you to know that like Susan I am thinking of you and your DH.  I can't imagine how you must be feeling but I know that you WILL find the strength to cope together... we are all here for you honey 

Take care of each other and hope to hear from you when you are feeling up to it

lots of love and hugs

Sarah xxxxxxxxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Thanks for the lovely messages. 

I'm feeling a bit numb and weird at the moment - don't feel like I can really grieve it until all the stuff leaves me  and I've not had any bleeding yet.  I wanted to have a D&C operation today which is when they scrape all the bits out of you but as I've had a virus for the last 2 weeks they won't put me under anaesthetic until I'm better.   I have to wait until Wednesday or go through the pain of it happening naturally before then.  Dear me, what we women go through!!

Have been passing time by researching where to have investigations done - am undecided between Mr ******* who is apparantly really good and will see me very soon, or Mr Rai at St Marys who is world renowned but I'd have to wait until June.  Decisions, decisions!  Will dwell on it over the weekend.

So how are things with you two?  The wedding in Scotland sounds lovely - I so need to visit Scotland.  Have only been to Edinburgh as a child when my dad might have got moved their for work and I hated it just cos I didn't want to leave the village we lived!  Sure I'd love it now!

Don't know if I'll be going back on the Clomid - will wait and see what hammermith consultant says.  Have totally given up with my nhs one - I found out that they'd struck me off their consultation list following my last appointment!  (luckily not off the ivf list)  They are in financial trouble and seems like they're trying to cut costs at every opportunity.

Hope to hear your news soon.

Vicx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster honey, its good to see you back on line so soon   I'm so sorry you're having to wait for a D&C, lets hope they will sort you out before you get any physical pain.  I think you're doing absolutely the right thing by busying yourself finding out where you can have investigations done - keep taking positive steps forward 

I went to Edinburgh about 6 years ago, my brother used to live there and I loved it, it's a fab city...other bits of Scotland are gorgeous too especially if you like mountains and blustery walks and stuff.

Sorry to hear your nhs trust is in financial trouble - mine is too, hence the 27 month ivf waiting list   the good news is I've got a date for my lap and dye now - 10th May so only 7 weeks to wait.  Also my DH has sorted us out with wireless broadband and has given me his ancient laptop so I can surf and watch telly/veg on the sofa at the same time - brilliant!  It's taking me a while to adjust to this old laptop tho, the keys are really small and close together and the mouse is a funny little green blob in the middle of the keyboard, my arrow is whizzing about all over the place  

Anyway sweetie have the best weekend you possibly can in the circumstances, I will be thinking of you - and if you're leaving the clomid board please keep in touch - I am now often on the Ex Clomid Chicks thread on the inbetween treatment board.  Take care of yourself hun

lots of love Sarah (and   to Susan too  )


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies ..Have just read your news Vicster     (have not been on here so much recently) and so so sorry hun   I have had two miscarriages and I know how utterly devastating it is .. Have they given you a date for a d&c yet ? I was sooo happy to see your BFP ..life is pretty cruel sometimes .. we are all thinking of you sweetie and sending you lots of              if you need to talk at any time just shout hun x 
Cat x


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Morning ladies,

Just thought I'd pop on and say hi as I haven't for a while  

How are you all doing?

Vic I hope you are OK and bearing up OK    Stay strong my love, we are all here for you 

Sarah I think I'm gonna come and join the diet thread, I really have to take control it's not funny anymore, I have no excuses Christmas is long gone!!!!! If I don't stamp it on the head now I'm never going to fit into any nice summer clothes, so thats the plan  diet, diet, diet and look good for the summer  

Another reason being DH and I are moving in the summer July/Aug to Shropshire so I'm really looking forward to coming home to england  

Well CD 24 and I have no hope for this month as no scans, no blood tests so just having to wait and see.

Right I'm off, I'll talk soon,

Take care

Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,

Sarah - glad you're feeling happy about the move.  Good luck with the losing weight - sounds like you are very determined so that's good.

I'm feeling a little stronger.  Am nervous about the operation tomorrow but I know it is for the best.

Will write again when I'm with it - anesthetics usually knock me out quite badly so may take a while to recover!!

Lots of love and   for bfps this cycle.

xx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Vicster,

I'll be thinking of you today, try and be strong, we are all here for you whenever you need us, just shout.
         

Lots of love

Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls

sorry I haven't been around for a while - just busy trying to keep my head above water!  Vicster hun I hope the op was OK and that you're not feeling too awful after the anaesthetic 

Susan you'd be more than welcome on the diet thread, it has really helped me so far... glad you are feeling so positive about moving back to England  

 Cat 

lots of love to all... keep those chins up girls and stay positive


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi girls,

The op went ok but I didn't react too well to the anesthetic and came round with a fever so they had to keep me in overnight.  Lots of waiting around for the op as the suregeon was suck in traffic but the doctors and nurses were really nice.  One male nurse who escorted me to the ward appeared later with a gift for me - a keyring with a religious message of hope.  Although I'm not of a particualr religion it was so sweet of him - there are some lovely people in this world!

Hope you are doing ok.  Good to keep busy in thes in between times Sarah.  Susan - how's the clomid cycle going?

Well better get back to my bed rest

Love Vicster
xx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thinking of you hun ..make sure you get really pampered cos you deserve it hun x 

Hi   Sarah and Susan x 
Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello lovely ladies

Vicster hun I'm so glad the people were so nice to you at the hospital and that the op went well - sorry to hear you were poorly afterwards though  Hope the research into what to do next is still going well and that you are taking it easy at the mo.  You're right, there are some lovely people in the world  

Hi Susan, hope you are ok, keeping  for you for a  this month... how's the diet going?  I am still sticking to WW (see my halo    ) and exercising too...  I think that's the key unfortunately!

  Cat, hope things are OK with you and that they have improved since your rotten time a couple of weeks ago


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

everyone,

Just thought I'd pop on and say hi as it's been a few days since I was last on, sorry been working all weekend and what with it being the start of the easter hols it's just gone a bit manic  

Vic- I hope you are feeling much better now and your fever has gone, also that you are finding time to relax, I'm sending you a massive virtual Easter egg and lots of    
hope to hear from you really soon.

Hi Sarah, I'm good thanks, you? I've not joined the diet thread just yet, I will soon promise, I'll surprise you    sending you an egg too Sarah (I think I'm going  )  

 Cat too, hope you are doing good, I'll send you a virtual egg too  

Well CD30 for me, so the old   should be showing her face in the next couple of days, please   her for me, the funny thing is that this month my (.)(.) are not sore at all and usually they are really sore by now, well a week before I don't know if this is a good sign or not? I'll keep you all posted.

I'll chat soon, I have to go as DH is moaning at me to give him the lap top 

Take Care Susan xxx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls, hope you are all well today  

Thanks for the virtual Easter Egg Susan (it's the only easter egg I'll be having this year thanks to the diet police    )   Hope your AF never shows up hun -  and here's a No AF dance for you:

        

  Cat and Vicster   

Take care everyone

love Sarah xxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies   ...Vicster how are you doing hun ? been thinking of you  

Susan ..thanks for the virtual egg ..how cool is that a virtual easter egg lol ..and hey it is compulsory on here to go a bit   every now and then   sending you      for a  

Sarah hi hun  .. yes things have improved .. donor has reduced his rates slightly (how good of him eh!) so all go again for this month I think .. have decided not to replace car whilst living here as can do without the stress of having it burnt out ..stolen ...vandalised ..seeing as I seem to be living on the road from hell at the moment ! Finally got paid out by the Insurance co ..well it is due here tomorrow!

Must go ..off for some retail therapy (I'm on hols this week) 

Take care everyone ..sorry if I have missed anyone out 
Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls... Cat that's great news both about the donor and the insurance money - enjoy your retail therapy hun! 

Susan and Vicster hope you are both ok 

Love to all xxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Sarah ...I really enjoyed the retail therapy even though most of it was not for me ..I ended up with a hair clip and a hot cross bun lol..but got some nice pressies for Ma and Pa .. is it me or is it really cold today brrrr ..can't seem to warm up ..I thought they said it was getting warmer towards the end of the week ..I might have to go out and do a   dance ! 
Cat x


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi me dearies,

Susan - Thank you for the virtual easter eggs!! 

Sarah - Well done for sticking to the ww - don't let that halo slip!

Cat - Glad things are looking up on the donor front.  Your sun dance worked for the south!!

I've been chilling at my parents, getting my strength up and enjoying the simple, peaceful things in life.  Well, not exactly peaceful as last night we got a phone call from my brothers neighbour saying that his ex girlfriend and her mad mother were trying to bang his door down and threatening to kill his new girlfriend!!  There seems to be more excitement here than in London!!  They got rid of them in the end but are understandably a bit shaken up.
My doc took one look at me the other day and signed me off work for another 2 weeks - it is nice to have that space but hopefully I won't need that long.

Better go.

Happy Easter everyone

Love Vicster
xx


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi everyone,

I hope you are all having a nice Easter weekend and enjoying the hols?

Nice to hear from you Vic and to know your doing ok   
what a pair of nutters your brother should of got the   to come and   the two   

Hi Sarah and Cat too, hope you are bith well and having a nice weekend.

I'm not up to much really, I went and had my nails done this afternoon   DH has promised to take me out tonight but I don't think he's going to (we will see though)
No sign of  of AF yet I really hope she stays away   

My dog, Honey, was going to the vets to get spayed on Mon, so DH rang me at work to tell me that they wouldn't take her in, so I asked why and bless her, shes havind a phantom pregnancy so now she has to have drops in her food to take away the symptoms.


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

sorry about that my message seemed to want to post it's self  

Anyway poor honey now has to wait till next month to see if the symptoms have gone away.

Have a good one,

Take Care

Susan xxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

OOh when are you testing Susan?


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi ladies,

Looks like I spoke too soon   has started to come this afternoon  so by the looks of things I'll count CD1 as tomorrow   

Hope you are all having a good Easter.

Thanks for the   Cat heres some coming your way       

Lots of  

Susan xxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ahhh sorry to hear the witch caught up with you Susan .. sending you more         for this next cycle.
Cat x


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls

Just a quickie to say happy easter  

Sorry to hear the  got you Susan  - and bless Honey - awww....

Hope you are both OK Vicster and Cat...

Off to do some boring painting now - glossing window frames - yuk!  Would rather be outside enjoying the 

Catch up with you all soon

Lots of love Sarah xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hellooee

Hope you all had a good, sunny Easter

Susan - so sorry the   arrived.  I was hoping that Honey was having a sympathy pregnancy for you!  

Sarah - hope the frames are truly glossed

ops, have to go
post again later
x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi lovelies

Hope you are all OK - was thinking about you today Vicster hoping you are doing ok - glad to see you have posted even tho just a quickie!

I have no news - other than now considering having IUI before IVF and also considering going to Essex Fertility Centre as it seems to have good success rates even though it's quite a long way from where we live

Love and     to all 

Sarah xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies ...Yes I have been thinking about you Vicster ..how are you doing hun  

Hi Sarah and Susan   ..started the   drugs again yesterday ... so on the rollercoaster ride again ! 

Hoping we all get BFP's very soon                        

Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

The very best of luck to you Cat...  for those s      

love Sarah


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello, I'm back......


I'm starting to feel stronger although I'm still not at work - I think that having a virus as well has made it hard to recover.  I don't want to go into total shutdown so I've been testing the water doing little things to see how much I can cope with.  Overdid it a bit yesterday and couldn't get out of bed until 1 today!! I hate that -especially on such a lovely, sunny day.  
Me and dh did a little saying goodbye thing on Monday which has helped us both.  We've been advised not to try again until we've has the test results etc so that we can gve the next pregnancy (if there is one ) the best possible chance of survival.  While I know that this is for the best (and that my body is too shattered to be pregnant again anyway) it is very hard as before trying again really helped me cope and gave me hope.  This all tests our patience to the extreme, doesn't it?!!


Sarah - glad you are coming to some decisions.  See what the consultant at your chosen clinic says about IUI cos they may think that your dh's swimmers aren't right for it.  Well, that is what our consultant told us after the last SA, but then look what happened so you never know.  Seems like male swimmers can be very erratic!!  I've heard that Essex clinic is very good so it is probably worth the extra miles!  Lots of        to you and your dh 

Susan - how are you doing? Lots of        to you and your dh (I've been starining my eyes at the photo of him but can't quite see what he looks like!)

Cat - good luck with this cycle.  Hope the crazy drugs don't get you down too much. Lots of        to you too.


Love Vicster
xx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster honey, it's nice to see you posting again.  I'm glad you're starting to feel a bit stronger, just take it a little at a time and take it easy .  I just wanted to say there WILL be another pregnancy for you   and I really pray that it will result in a lovely healthy baby for you.  Your appointment in June will be here before you know it - I am passing the time until my laparoscopy and IVF appointments by concentrating on losing weight and getting as fit as possible and that helps me feel that I am doing something constructive - maybe you could focus on trying to get really uber fit and eating really healthily, taking supplements etc if you don't already?  I think it gives you something positive to focus on, you know?

Have a good weekend and enjoy the sunshine, 

lots of love to all you ladies   Cat and Susan 

Sarah xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Thanks Sarah hun, that is very good advice.  I already take lots of vits and usually eat healthily but since the my appetite has been a bit weird so I'll start eating healthy again.  I also haven'tdone proper exercise for months as I was too exhauseted when i was preggers, so I'm planning to ease mysefl back into the dancing and I also really need to firm up my backside and thighs which have gone like jelly!  Oh, and the bingo wings need sorting out too!

Enjoy the weekend.  I'm going to see my nephews tomorrow - they always cheer me up!
xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

I hope you are all keeping well? 
So glad you are feeling better Vic I hope you had a good time with your nephews the other day, bet you spoil them   I have 3 nieces, Bethany 9, Rhiannon 6 and Tia 6 they are lovely (most of the time!!) there have been a few exceptions   

Sarah I was noticing your ticker and just seen how much weight you've lost WOW well done  hows the window frames   

Hi Cat too,     for this month

Sorry I haven't been on for a little while, I've been so busy most days, what with work then catching up with the house work and going out most evenings on my   by the time I sit down for a relax I'm falling asleep on the sofa before I even know it.

CD12 scan for me on Fri so hoping for a   response from my cons.

Not being cheeky but can someone   and get me off the odd number, I repay the favour 

I'm off now to watch Eastenders, chat to you all soon.

Take Care

Susan xxx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello my lovelies  

Hope you had a good time with your nephews Vicster and that you've been getting on down/boogying/cutting some rug/throwing some shapes like a good 'un!    I would LOVE to be able to dance but am completely rubbish    Strictly Come Dancing is my favourite thing  

Susan how lovely to have 3 nieces, I've got 2 and they are both gorgeous but only about 6 months old so far bless em, so they're not really into disney films or shopping yet    Good for you getting out on your   hun   thanks for noticing my weight loss!  Unfortunately I have hit a bit of a plateau lately and not lost anything for 3 weeks but I can't give up, I've still got 2 stone to go 

Hello Cat  how you doing hun?

I have blown you all some bubbles... off now to do some housework then out tonight for my dad's 65th birthday bless his heart 

Lots of love to all xxxxxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello me mateys   

What have you got planned for this sunny weekend?  Hope the weight watching is still going well.  Lovely evenings for bike riding Susan - keep it up!  I used to ride my bike alot until I got a flat tyre and haven't been bothered to fix it!! 

I had a lovely time with my nephews thank you. They are 4 and 6 and are so sweet and funny - the youngest one always asks if he can go home with his Auntie each time we visit!  We searched for bugs in the garden with the "bug vacuum" that Lucas got for his birthday.  What fun! I love such things!  The only negative thing was my sister in law is a bit weird and I don't feel particularly comfortable with her.  Also, I felt like I was being assessed on my skills with children in light of me wanting my own so badly.  My paranoia I know , although she did make a comment about how she could tell I wasn't used to holding hands with children in the street cos apparently I led my 4 year old nephew too close to a bush!!!  


I love Striclty dancing too Sarah!  I almost got to see the live show last year as a friend was on the production team but they only find out if they can get people in last minute and I had birthday celebrations on both occasions      I'd love to try some ballroom dancing - my specialism is contemporary dance (the weird stuff you get on channel 4 !!! - actually it's not all weird, believe me!) and I have done many other styles of dance except ballroom.  I tried some Tango once and picke dit up quite quicjly but even so didn't have the patience to invest to get realy good.  

Am still feeling a bit poorly and delicate but am feeling more postive and hopeful about making a baby  .  Saw the consultant at Hammersmith yesterday who was excellent and reckons that working with St Mary's he'll be able to help and that our prospects are good.  DH has to have a more detailed SA to see how athletic his   are!!  I have to have another HSG scan as the miscrriages might have left stuff in my tubes.  I still can't face seeing my pregnant and with baby friends as I don't feel like I've got the energy to deal with the pain it brings - there is also joy, but as you know, it is a 'sweet and sour' thing (Rosie P's words - a great way of putting it.  thank you Rosie!)

  

Anyway, I'm off now to watch some trashy TV and have a glass of wine.

Cat - how are you?

Thanks for the bubbles Sarah

Love as always
Vicster


----------



## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Morning ladies,

Hope you are all OK and looking forward to the weekend  

I have been waiting for this day for 10 long hard days and couldn't see it coming soon enough, I work 10 days on then 4 days off needless to say I'm on my 4 days off now      not excited or anthing but I just had one of those weeks where nothing seems to go right and have ended up doing most of the work as the two new girls who have been there for 3+ months now still don't know, oh well sorry for the moan, that feels so much better now  

Sarah thanks for the bubbles   some coming straight back   some for Vic and Cat too  

Vic glad your appointment went well and good luck to your DH for his next   test, also for you too Vic with the HSG (how do you find them) ouch when I went for mine it really was quite sore in fact really   sore.
I'm glad things are looking good for you and that your cons was very  

I also was at the hospital yesterday for my CD12 scan, I think it went quite well, I have to go back on Mon to see either if the follies have got any bigger or if they have popped over the weekend  

I came out of ther feeling quite good keep rubbing my right hand side, which has the biggest follie and saying come on grow, thats sad I know   I even went to tesco and bought some Brazil nuts and some pineapple juice, quite yummy, so I'll nibble on them over the weekend and see if it does the trick.

When I came home I was quite   as I got out the car and was walking up the drive I looked up and saw loads of ballons in next doors window, honestly the whole window was covered with them and they said     I'm happy for them, but wish deep down it was me.

You all have a lovely weekend and be good  

Take Care Love Susan XXX


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Grow Susan's follie grow!!!  
Sending  some magic   north to you !!  

That's hard seeing the balloons but glad you are mainly feeling positive    after the scan.

My last HSG was a bit uncomfortable mainly because the machine broke down in the middle of it so I was left with the stuff up me while they fixed it!!!! Hopefully the next one will be better!

I hope you have a great 4 days off.  I quite fancy that arrangement myself! What are you up to?

Hi Sarah and Cat
xxx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

again,

Oh Vic what a nightmare having the machine break down, I hope this time is far better.

Thanks for the   

I'm not really doing much today, the football is on soon Spurs v's Arsenal so gonna watch that (come on you Spurs)

DH is doing something to the fish tank with potions trying to sort the chemical levels out.

It's a bit cold here today so not planning on going out, just relax and enjoy our weekend together.

Hope you have a good weekend too some more   for you 

Chat soon Susan xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies ..sorry been slack .. 
Susan hun wanted to give you a hug when I read about you going home to see the balloons ..it is so bittersweet isn't it ..as you are happy for them but want it to be you ...I am sure it will be you one day hun ..wishing you lots of follicle growing power  x 

Vicster ..sorry you are still feeling a bit under the weather but great news the feedback you have got from the docs.

Sarah ..yes well done on your weight loss ..I am going to hang around the diet thread more as I am rejoining ww this week .. I have put so much weight on whilst being on clomid and I feel like a total blobby whale..so going to join the gym and ww and hopefully see some results!

Big hug to you all x 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello chicks  

Vicster it sounds like you had great fun with your nephews - bug vacuum?    Your SIL does sound a bit wierd though - don't take a blind bit of notice hun, you'll be a fantastic mama   It's great that your consultant at Hammersmith said your prospects are good! 

Susan I too was really touched to read about the balloons    but Cat is right, one day it will be your turn  the other day I walked past a card shop and there was a great big card in the window with a black and white photo of a sleeping baby and the words "to my wife on the birth of our baby" and that nearly had me in tears... I so want to give DH a child, he would be such a brilliant daddy bless him.   Thanks for the bubbles hun, and I'm sending your follie lots of      in fact here's a follie growing dance just for you

                       

Cat it's good to see you on the diet thread, hope you're feeling less like a whale by now - I'm sure you don't look like one!

Must go ladies, it's nearly home time.... catch up with you soon,

lots of love to all


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey girls,

Just a quickie as I'm really tired and need some shut eye.


Hope you are having a good long weekend Susan and enjoyed some chill time with your hubby.  One of my best mates is a mad spurs fan!  I'm not that into football (excpet the workd cup) although my dad, brother and dad's family support Crystal Palace and I've been to few games with them. I quite got into football when I loved in Turin in Italy as there wasn't much to do except watch Juventus - that was when Henry and Zidane were with them so was pretty cool.  I'm going to do a real life follie dance for you now. ..........  There, did you enjoy it??!


Ahh, thanks Sarah.  I know we'll be fantastic parents and isn't it soo frustrating when you know that and it just ain't happening!!! Sometimes when I look at my dh I wanna cry cos I love him so much and know he'll be such a great dad.  
I reckon that going through all this will make us not just good parents but totally fantastic, amazing parents!!!  I love yuor dance, quite a bizarre line up but I can see yu have an eye for design!?!
Love yer    


Hey Cat, lots of love to you.  Hopefully I'll get round to catching up with you on the clomid chat thread - always cheers me up reading your funny posts.  I hope that your cycle is going well - are you using the doner?   


xx


----------



## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster hun   

What could possibly be bizarre about my line up?  

I know just what you mean about looking at your DH and feeling   - but don't worry, I'm sure your DH WILL be a daddy before too long, just focus on what the Hammersmith chap said      - and you're right, we will all be fantastic amazing parents!!!

Have a good day darlin  

and you too Susan and Cat


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies .. 

Well I am Mrs Constipated today again        ..seem to be getting it really bad and really bad headaches even though I am trying to drink plenty! 

I just need a big   and I will be less of a whale   I do feel really positive Sarah and have the most enthusiasm I have had for a long time re dieting .. as know I can achieve it ..as have done it before ..it just needs some determination on my part ..I am doing it with a friend and we get quite competitive ! 

Yes I am using the same donor .. despite him ripping us off .. it is just less hassle than waiting for ages for another one and it will be worth the cost if it succeeds! I have no idea when I am going to ovulate ..Have been using the ov tests but not had a positive as yet ..I think if I ovulate it is usually late in my cycle ..I am going to ring the hospital to see if they can give me a scan to give me an indication ..it is a nightmare organising things otherwise! 

It is funny the things that set you off    isn't it ..it is often things like that that get me going ..cute cards ..seeing little girls with their Mummy's ..I wonder if the women realise how very lucky and blessed they are.. and know through my job that a lot don't ! 

I think there are so many great parents to be on this site ..because so much heartache and love has gone into trying for our babies we will cherish them when they arrive    

Vicster are you still feeling run down hun ..maybe you could do with a tonic ..I remember feeling like that after my miscarriage years ago and it took a tonic to top me up with iron etc to make me start feeling a bit normal again !

Sarah I loved the follie dance ..it was cool  

Hi Susan   ..how are you ?
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for all your lovely messages and the follie dances.
                    
I have done one for all of you too 

Cat I hope you are feeling better soon and have managed to have some movement down below soon 
I was reading, think it might of been on the other thread that you were having bad head aches and wanted to know if anyone else was having these symptoms..... well this time round for me, this is my 5th month on the clomid, I have been having really bad head aches for the past two days, so bad in fact today I was sick, not sure but I think I'm due to OV any day now so I'm hoping that this is why 

Vic, what fab friends you have supporting Spurs, thanks for the real life dance, hope you had a good relax and are feeling better, you were up late!

Hi Sarah the dance was so fab thanks, lovin those chillies!

Right I'm not being rude but DH is calling me to come to bed     

so better go before he changes his mind!!!

Lots of love to you all

Take Care Susan xxxxxxxxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi again Ladies ..Yes I have felt a bit sick with my headaches Susan but then I often do if I have a migrainy type headache.. its wierd how you can get completely different symptoms each cycle isn't it ..this is the worst one I have had for headaches ..but wonder whether it might be the weather/pollen etc too ..we tend to assume it is all the clomid ...but I know that rape seed flowers set me off as well with itchy nose and other symptoms..and there is a lot of tree and grass pollen around at the mo..cos of the lovely weather..

Local honey is supposed to be a great natural hayfever medication ..which makes sense really as a natural antidote to the pollen ..as the bees feed on the pollen, I ordered two jars of it ..it is expensive about £3 a jar but when you think what you spend on crappy medication that makes you feel dopey ..I thought it is worth a go ..and not too bad on toast without butter when you are trying to be healthy!

Any news from Jo yet ?
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello chicks

Glad you liked the follie dance Susan  that your  does the trick this month! 

Hi Cat, hope you have managed to do a poo by now!    I know what you mean, sorry about all this tmi   but I usually take a sennokot max the day before weigh in at FatFighters! What do you do for a job by the way?

Hi Vicster  hope you're ok today hun  

Bye for now girls... xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

I work as a complaints officer      ...oh and just to update you ..yes I have   'd but still very constipated .. I must have lots of prog rushing around I think !! ..still waiting for a pos ov test    
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

hee hee glad to hear you've   'd Cat, blimey the things we talk about on here     have you tried eating some prunes or bananas or plums?  Or all 3!!!  you get a pos ovulation test soon


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ha ha ..funnily enough my password at work this week is plums   ..I eat bananas and apples and pineapple juice ..but told that bananas are not particularly good for solving the   problem ha ha 

I might get some prune juice ..is it nice ?!!  

Its funny cos on met I used to have met bum   which was horrible now it is the opposite !! 

Might nip to sainsburys tomorrow and get some prune juice 
Thanks for the tip ...and yes we talk about anything on here don't we ..well I am sure I am not the only one to have had this problem.. 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Cat  I really like prune juice and I gave it to my DH once who hadn't had it before, he had a whole glass instead of his usual fruit juice without realising it's "properties" and it definitely worked!


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Just popping on to say have a nice weekend, I hope you all have a chance to relax and enjoy the lovely    

Well I'm going to be working so roll on next weekend till I'm off  

Take Care

Susan xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Sarah..def must give prune juice a go ..I couldn't find it in Sainsburys I think they must have sold out ..rush of constipated people before me lol

Susan ..Sorry you have to work this weekend hun ..roll on next weekend for you x

Vicster ..How are you hun ?
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hellooee..

Cat - hope your tummy is better!Hope you are having a good weekend  

Susan - hope work's not too stressful.  

Sarah - hope you are havign a good weekend. Have you chosen your clinic yet? 

How are things for everyone cycle wise?  Any promising signs??  

I've been feeling very pmt-ish the last few days so have been a bit   and  

Had a last minute massage on Thursday as felt like a spot of pampering which was lovely  

Went out for friend's birthday lin the West End ast night but didn't last too long as felt really spaced out and uncomfortable, like I didn;t have much to say to anyone.  Think I need more time!  
Anyway, today has been positive - did my first dance class in ages, went for a yummy Indian and watched Borat with DH - had a right old giggle!  

I must go as I need to sell some shoes on E-Bay - I'm terrible with shoes, I can never find any that fit properly and that don't cut my feet up and I always buy the wrong ones and don't realise until I've worn them when it is too late to return them!  So, am always losing money and having to flog on ebay!  Most women I know love shoes!! I HATE THEM!!!!! 
- see, I'm a hormonal volcano at the moment!!


Love to you all

Vicx

oh no, our new neighbours are playing very loud, extremely awful music again and singing along - well, Its nice to hear they are happy! Shame about their bad taste


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ha ha .. I like the bit about your dodgy neighbours hun ..painful shoes are awful aren't they I spent a fortune of a couple of pairs of boots (black and brown) in a make that are supposed to be really good ..well they are the most uncomfortable boots ever ..the soles are so thin that your feet feel bruised after wearing them ...was gutted ..even putting two insoles in each boot didn't help much ! now I am an old fart and tend to buy hush puppy boots just for the sheer comfort and because I do a lot of walking ! 

I am still waiting for a pos ov test ..so pee stick queen at the moment ..hoping to get one next week ..     
Take care everyone x 
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

to Cat for a positive pee stick.

Hope everyone has had a good weekend.

Felt much more positive today  
PMT symptoms seem to have vanished so don't know what is going on there!  Have started to worry a bit that the af will not return - for once I want her asap!!

Wish I could go on this site at work - it would make the day much more bearable!  I have access to the internet but my computer screen is visible to everyone walking past.  Oh well.

Hope you are all well

Good night  to you all

Vicster


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi grils ..I am really frustrated   angry and sad   ... my donor has let me down again ..he was supposed to be coming tomorrow as I had a positive ov test today ..but phoned me up a little while ago (woke me up) to cancel as if he was cancelling a tea party .. I wanted to shout and scream at him but just thought I have got to be grateful as he won't do it (even though we are paying him!) I feel like a useless puppet on a string that he is controlling and I just want to scream ..this is my last cycle of clomid before going back to the hospital and maybe my last cycle and if he doesn't come tomorrow then it will probably be too late on tuesday ...so feels like a complete waste of even being on the drugs      starting to wonder why I am putting myself through this each month ..cos it is breaking my heart.  I almost think I would have been better off never believing in this dream to have a baby!
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Good morning ladies, I hope you are all well?

Cat what a     
How can he just play with you emotions like that, has he go no  
Lots of     to you as I really feel for you not only the effects of the   pills but him too!

On a more   note I read on another thread that he did turn up and is coming today too, so I really hope this month is your month Cat, goodness knows with what you've been through you deserve it, lots of    to you and I really hope May is a much better month for you, once again  

Vic- I hope you've had lots of bids on your shoes  
How are you feeling anymore PMT signs?    to your neighbours,
god listen to me I just want to   everyone must be the signs of the   coming 

Sarah hope you are ok hun  

Well must go and get showered and then off to work, early start and hopefully early finish 

Have a good day all

Susan xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Susan ...thanks sweetie sorry I should have updated you on here but have not been on much..yes he turned up eventually on Monday thank goodness .. and yesterday ..I have carried on doing the opk's as don't really trust them and got another positive looking one today so I am hoping the little swimmers can last long enough if the first one was a false one .. god this is difficult isn't it .. I could have done with him all week really but that would have bankrupted me ! 

Vicster ..How did the shoe selling go ? and have your neighbours shut up yet !!

We need to invent a screen that means other people can't see the FF screen open but you can ha ha !

Sarah ..How are you hun ? I have the   problem again ..I really must get that prune juice ..the WW sweets I have been eating are supposed to have a laxative effect ..well NO of course they havn't when you need them too!!

Well I guess I am officially in the 2ww now .. not going to analyse things too much and for that reason I am not sure about doing a diary .. I might see how I feel after the first week and perhaps do a final week one.. 

     to you all x 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls, sorry I have been AWOL for so long... AF arrived and have been feeling a bit pooey plus had a really hectic busy time last week so FF got a bit left behind  

Hope you are all ok and enjoying the long weekend....

Susan hope you're not working too much hun 

Hi Vicster, hope you've managed to sell some shoes and that your noisy neighbours have shut up!  Also hope that AF has turned up by now for you.  We have chosen our clinic at last, we are going to the Essex Fertility Centre at Holly House in Buckhurst Hill.

Cat keeping everything crossed for you on the 2WW        

I am off to the hospital first thing in the morning to get some blood taken for hormone profile ready for IVF consultation - what a fun way to spend bank holiday monday!  So better be off to bed now... dh is probably off in the land of nod by now bless him he's been digging the garden all day (as you can tell we lead a really crazy rock'n'roll lifestyle... not!)

Take care girls and hope to "speak" again soon

lots of love Sarah xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks for the sticky vibes hun  ..sorry the blasted  caught up with you ..hope everyone has had a good bank holiday ..don't they whizz by fast ..oh well at least a shorter working week    
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

You're welcome hun - sending you lots of positive vibes as well as sticky ones        

bank holidays whizzing past - don't they just?! I blinked and nearly missed the darn thing    Never mind, it's nearly Friday  

 Vicster and Susan, hope you're both ok


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all, hope you are all OK?

Sarah, you are so beautiful, the pic of you and DH is gorgeous, he is a lucky man  
I don't know why but for some reason I imagined you being a brunette.
I hope you are feeling better sorry the   got you, sending lots of    for this month,

Vic, hope you are OK, has the   shown yet? Did you have any time off over the bank holiday, if so I hope you enjoyed every second of it, sending you lots of     as always, hope to hear from you soon.

Cat, hows the dreaded 2ww going? it just seems to drag on forever, not good! like I said in another post I'm really keeping my  for you so lots of   coming your way.

As for me I've been quite busy over the bank holiday weekend, DH has gone away with work for two months   he's coming home on the 29th of June, I'm missing him so much already but thats his job so I just have to put up with it!
It was my friends 30th on Sat so we had a BBQ then all the women snuck off to our local, leaving the men to mind the children (needles to say I'm the only one in our group of friends that hasn't got any) it was a great day and the   held off so all in all a smashing time was had by us all.

So as for DH being away for two months I'm not going to be taking any clomid    I'm glad of a break really as I have been on them solid for 5 months and they do make you a bit   as you all know. I'll still be around from time to time though for a gossip.

Love and   to you all, chat soon 

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey you three!

AF finally arrived and was really bad so Sunday and Monday were a bit of a write off!   

Went to a friend's wedding on Saturday which was great fun   - she married a Palestinian guy so there was lots of drumming and dancing, including a belly dancer!.  The wedding party attracted lots of attention from people on the high street as we left the registry office as we were so loud!  I feared a bit for my friend's life as she got lifted up by the guys quite alot, including once sitting on a chair!!

Sarah - that picture is amazing and you look so lovely!  I too had imagined you as a brunette, but also as Winnie the Pooh due to your alias!!  It is so strange how we imagine people to look!  I won't mention again how lovely your dh looks, cos otherwise you'll get the wrong idea!! 
Glad you've decided ona clinic - I hope they treat you well.  I love gardening too by the way and over Easter I got into Birdwatching!!

Susan-  we're here for you while your dh is away.  I'm sure it is annoying that you have to put things on hold but you sound like you've accepted it and are as chirpy as ever! Have you got anything nice planned to do while he's away?  I hope you pamper yourself and enjoy the break from the drugs.  The 30th sounds like fun!

Cat  - hope you are surviving the 2ww and haven't turned into a nutty knicker checker!  
My shoes sold so that is good!  Still haven't found any that fit and that I also like yet.  I ended up borrowing my mum's sandals for the wedding! I HATE SHOES! Actually, I hate them so much I might take out my af anger on some by destroying them completely! Well, that is better than taking it out on the poor snails in my garden - the other week I chucked loads of them into a bucket of salty water!  I felt so   after and had to apologise to them!

Lots of    to you all

Vicster
x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls

Thank you for saying you like the photo - I'm all embarrassed now - honestly you wouldn't believe what a difference a big trowel-full of makeup can make!  (not to mention a clever photographer  )  

Susan I'm glad you had such a smashing bank holiday weekend but so sorry to hear your DH is away for 2 months    at least as you say it gives you a break from the loopy drugs and just think how great it will be when he gets back!  Will you be able to see him at weekends or anything?  As Vicster says we are still here for you while he is away!   

Vicster sorry to hear the  got you hun  never mind it can't be long till your appointment at Paddington (my appointment on 21st June is 6 weeks tomorrow not that I'm counting at all!   )  Your friends' wedding sounds amazing, I love belly dancing (watching not doing!)  It's funny that you and Susan both thought I was a brunette, I would love to be one!  My alias IS after Winnie the Pooh, DH thinks I look like a pooh bear     Glad you think my DH looks lovely, I must admit he is pretty lovely and I am rather fond of him   Brilliant news that you sold your shoes - well done!  I was thinking about putting some stuff on ebay but I find the whole thing a bit intimidating for some reason (namely that I am a wimp I spose)  Poor snails    I know what you mean though, you want to get rid of them because they're such a nightmare for eating everything in the garden but I think they're really cute too so I just move them in the daft hope they won't come back - hmmm)

Cat hun hope you are OK  still sending you lots of  and    

I have got my laparoscopy tomorrow so am feeling a bit  hope to be back on line on Friday or Saturday depending on how long it takes me to get over the anaesthetic!  Till then take care girls,

lots of love Sarah xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

I HOPE THE LAP GOES OK TOMORROW SARAH AND THAT YOU RECOVER QUICKLY
XXXXXX


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hello Ladies ...

Sarah ..hope the lap went ok today hun  

Vicster...nasty witch   

Susan .. Hi hun x

Well 1st week of 2ww is over .. still getting twinges and was sure I felt a bit nauseous last night but the metformin can have that effect !! and had an urge to eat lots of food today .. chocolate ..great big lovely sandwich with prawns lettuce sweetcorn and cucumber ... a packet of quavers .. so not sure if that is pmt arriving !! 

Still being        tho .. 

How is everyone today ?
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls    thanks for your good wishes, I am home now with a huge tummy (looking 6 months preggers - I wish!) they took away a fibroid the size of a tangerine and loads of endo - I had no idea either of them were there - got to wait 4 months before ttc again to give womb time to heal - will probably still need ivf tho  

Cat I am keeping everything crossed for you hun              your sandwich sounds lovely and mmmmmm quaaaavers mmmmm  

Hope you all have lovely weekends girls  to Vicster and Susan

love y'all xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Aww Sarahpooh, you poor thing. 

  It is crazy that you didn't even realise they were there - our bodies are very good at covering things up. How frustrating having to wait to start trying again - I hope you can do some nice things in this time and as you so wisely advised me, spend the time getting healthy.  

Get lots of rest and pamper yourself

Love vic    

hi everyone else, catch up soon
x


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies ..Ahh Sarah bless you .. hoping it really improves things for you x 

Vicster ..Hope you are ok hun x 
Susan .. Ditto to you .. 

I had another nauseas moment today so really hoping it is a little bean bedding in and not the met .. less than a week to go before testing yipee .. thanks for the sticky vibes x
Cat x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hello Ladies ... Had another nausea moment a big one this time this morning at work .. I don't dare believe that it might mean something good !!! 

How is everyone ?
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

Hope you are all well?

Sarah I hope you are feeling much better and your tummy has gone down by now and you are taking time to relax  

Hi Vic, how are you? big  for you  

Hi Cat, well I hope the  (sicky feelings) are a   sign    and you get a  this month   heres a dance for you              

lots of   for you all too

Im still waiting for the  too, no sign so far but boobies quite tender at the moment  

Any how must dash as have to go and make meal of one! (missing DH)

Love to you all

Susan xxx


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello my friends...

Cat - I really hope those symptoms are a sign of good things  

Sarah - hope you are getting better 

Susan - Good sore boobie sign!  Fingers crossed .  

I'm not going to write much cos I'm feeling really down after doing a presentation for my course - it just brought it home to me that I can't focus properly on other things and how much I want children and am so narked off that my body won't let me.  Feeling pretty unsure of myself generally.  Probably the hormones still playing up.  Thought af had finsihed on friday but more came out today.  SOrry to moan

Vicxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Don't worry about saying how you feel Vicster hun  you are bound to feel down after going through all the upheaval and stress of ttc ..then you have another miscarriage it is like someone has ripped your heart out ..as all that hope that you had feels destroyed .. but I am sure you will get there hun .. don't lose heart and don't be too hard on yourself .. it is getting more and more common women having infertility problems which beggars belief why they don't do more research into what causes it ..as well as trying to resolve it !! it gets too little money .. I think we should start a campaign for more money for research .. I feel quite militant ..it makes me so cross that it is such low priority as far as the NHS budget goes ..but it does affect peoples lives so much .. I dread to think how many women have had breakdowns over infertility just because it is so stressful ..and it is such a basic human function yet sometimes so hard ...yet if we chose to take drugs ..we would get treatment for our problems without question I am sure ..and without waiting on a waiting list for years .. grrrrr makes me so cross ..sorry for getting on my soapbox !! 

Susan ..thanks for the dance ..how cool was that !!  
Sarah ..How are you hun?  
right off to bed ..nighty night x
Cat x


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Aww thanks Cat for the lovely message.  I'm feeling much better today.  How are you?  Hopefully the witch is not on her way  


Hi Sarah and Susan   

Not much interesting to report  - just work, essay writing and bum lifting exercises as my **** and upper legs really have turned to jelly; have lost all feeling in that area!

Lots of love
Vicx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

No sign of the witch as yet !!        
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

Just a quick one.

     coming your way Cat really, really, really got everything crossed for you 

 to the   

Vic good for you      think I'll have to join you!!

Hi Sarah hope you are doing good?

No   yet for me either, I'm holding out haven't tested as yet gonna is if she appears over the weekend, but you never know!

Love to you all

Susan xxxx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ooh Susan ... rooting for you hun x 
Cat x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Well got BFN but no old witch today .. so been feeling a bit   also had my consultant appointment and he noticed from some blood results last year that I might have a thyroid problem which he said would affect my fertility .. so got some bloods to do next week and hopefully get some answers soon.. 

Hope you are all well x 
~Cat x


----------



## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello

Susan - how amazing would it be for you to get a bfp now that your dh has gone away!  My fingers are crossed for you hun 

Cat - bloomin', flippin', cra**y witch - I'm so sorry she's here again.  And that is pants about the thyroid thing too, especially them only just realising.  Here's hoping that you get some answers.  I'm sending you lots of huggles and hope the   don't last too long x

Hope you are ok Sarah?

Well, I've had a totally frustrating, exhausting day... finally got a letter from my consultant about the m/c tests.  A few are fine but turns out the stupid member of staff who took my blood didn't take the right amount/put it in the right bottles for the thrombo-what's- it-me- called tests. In the letter it said that they were still waiting for the chromosome tests for me and dh which were being analysed at another hospital (where I work) and sent to the fertility hospital.  Well, I don't trust them at all, so  I used my swipe card to go to the genetics lab to try and find out where my tests were!!!  Found quite a nice secretary who looked it up on the database:  dh's test had been done and sent to my hospital (but obviously got lost) and mine hadn't even been done!!!! So they didn't even get round to sending my sample to the lab!!! How sh*t is that!  So I demanded getting my consultant to arrange for me to have other tests and went to have them today (bit if a trek).  They better be back for my consultation at St Mary;s otherwise I'll be fuming!  I'm going to phone every week and get them to fax the results.  As if we need all this extra stress!!  I was also humiliated trying to explain to my GP's receptionist about some tests they did on the "product" of my m/c's which were also never sent anywhere.  She treated me like an inconvenience with no sympathy whatsoever. Turns out the tests failed as teh cells didn't culture.  I can't believe how stressful this all is and they have the nerve to tell us to relax!!!

Have been like you Cat and written a letter to my mp. Will also write one to the hospitals involved.  So glad I'm going private soon even though we are having to borrow money!

Sorry for the rant - not very eloquently put
xx


----------



## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Well I just typed a long reply and my cat managed to delete it grrr .. I just shouted at him and he has gone off now looking extemely piddled off with me ... 

Vicster hun sounds like you have had a crappy day .. and sounds like your hospital are about as good as mine .. I hope they pull their finger out and get it sorted for you hun .. x
Susan ..Good luck hun x 
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Ahh, cats are funny.   Mine likes to walk over the keyboard too.  Is that your cat in the picture Cat? She (think its a she?) looks a bit like mine - will dig out a picture!

Well, I'm feeling quite upbeat and chirpy today so I thought I'd spread some positivity!   

I finally finished my assignment so I'll never have to write an essay again in my life!!  Now I'll have my weekends back!   Once I'd finished me and dh went to Wimbledon village for a smoothie and a walk in the park - it was beuatiful - the sun was shining, people looked happy and the floweres were so colourful and pretty.  We spotted a woodpecker feeding her chicks which I got excited about due to my new found love of birdspotting thanks to my dad's efforts to help me recouperate!  We also saw a Parakeet, yes a Parakeet in London! You may have heard that they now breed in Richmond park!  Sometimes they venture to Tooting...my old housemate was in his room when he saw one crash into his window - he thought he was hallucinating!

Anyway, better go as dh is calling me for dinner.

Love and sunshine  to you all.  I hope you are doing ok. 

Vicster
xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Period didn't amount to anything barely a smear (tmi sorry) so I have got to take Provera ..not sure whether to leave it a couple more days and test again first ..but think I am kidding myself really as don't feel pregnant .. 

Glad you are feeling chirpy Vicster x 
How is everyone today ?
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all, hope you are all OK?

Vic- your walk sounded so lovely, I found myself having a bit of a day dream when I was reading about it, I was walking around listening to the sounds of the birds   I know but still I enjoyed it for the brief 10 seconds or so.
Wow, so you have finished all your essay writing   bet your glad about that, well done  

Cat- sorry AF hasn't really amounted to much, still in a way like you say there could be a tiny glimmer of hope there    

Hi Sarah, how are you doing? 

Well the old, ugly, mean, cow of a   got me yesterday morning, great way to start the week off, bit upset about it  really as DH and I tried really hard, what with me drinking pineapple juice and eating Brazil nuts like there was no tomorrow, but hey must stay  
So this is me now for the next couple of months Au natrelle until I meet and discuss my new fertility cons in sunny Shropshire.

A dance to get the witch:
        

A dance to keep us  
       

Love to you all

Susan xxx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello my lovelies 

Sorry I've been AWOL for so long - been sleeping a lot and not doing much 

Susan I'm so sorry to hear the  got you especially as you had been trying so hard    But you're right, you must stay     there will be a  for you one day hun   How are you getting on with your DH being away?  Hope you're OK hun. 

Vicster WELL DONE for getting your last assignment in!  I remember that lovely feeling of freedom well (I STILL have scary dreams that I've got an exam I never did any studying for and that I've forgotten to do an essay and I finished my degree in 1999!   ) My mum is doing a history degree and has to hand in her final bit of dissertation in 2 weeks, she is a nervous wreck bless her heart, I'll be so pleased for her when she's finished!)  I was so sorry to read about the total cock up they made with your blood samples and stuff   it really is a nightmare isn't it, some people in the NHS are lovely but others just don't seem to care or have any empathy with the patients.  Never mind, I'm glad you're feeling more chirpy now. 

Cat hun sorry to hear you got a BFN - but maybe it could have been a false alarm as it was so small?  Not that I'm trying to get your hopes up or anything.  Also presumably if there's something wrong with your thryroid they can fix it for you?  In some ways it could be a good thing because if they've found a problem and they fix it it could be all systems go!

Hope you are all ok girls, I am feeling a lot better now although my belly button is still a bit sore where they put the telescope thingy or whatever in it (what on earth do they do if you've got an outy?) but my huge tum has gone down a bit... back to work on Friday - boooo!  

speak to you soon girls,

lots of love
sarah xxxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hello Ladies ..sorry for the BFN's ..hope you are all ok x 

Yes they are positive about fixing my underactive thyroid ..so relieved they finally spotted it from my blood tests .. having to take Provera now to make AF come after my sixth BFN .. so hopefully get them done next week and then get some tablets soon after.. feeling quite chirpy really .. sorry its a short one but baby sitting at the moment !!
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Cat that sounds like great news - not that you've got underactive thyroid but that they can fix it!   Glad you're feeling chirpy and hope you enjoyed the babysitting!  Soon you'll be permanently babysitting for your own baby hun  

Morning Susan and Vicster 

Got to go now, loads to do today - house looks like a bomb site  

lots of love to all xxxxxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello me darlings.

Thought I'd have a quick catch up - all of us except Cat are having to have a break at the moment, aren't we?  So we're all in limbo land.    
Cat - what has happened with your cycle? Hope you are doing well hun and not going clomid crazy

Sarah  - how are you feeling? Is your tummy feeling better?
Susan - how are you coping without dh?
Hope you both are managung to enjoy some time away from all the baby making madness.

Me and dh have been enjoying other things in life, including a few drinks.  We;ve been in a real can't be bothered ****it all kind of mood! Not that we really drank much, but usually we don't drink anything!

I've been doing lots of dancing and going out lots.  I kinda don't want to stop cos I want to avoid all the nasty stuff.
Anyway, am starting to feel like we should start focusing on our quest again even though we can't start trying yet so have just ordered a load of super vits etc.  I'm getting really nervous about our appointment next week and am also nervous about getting our chromosome results (am still chasing them!)

I'm a bit confused by my cycle as well cos I was convinced af was just round the corner which would have been an amazingly more normal length cycle, but today I had a globdule of what looked like fertile cm (sorry, if tmi!) so maybe it is actually ovulation time and my cycle is going to be much longer this time!  If so, it is very annoying as my cycles had regulated to 32-34 days until the m/c and I really thought I had got to grips with what was happening!.  

This is all so pants, rubbish bo**ox, sh**, flippin annoying, horrendous,  bloo*y bul**it, ahhhhhhhhh I wanna scream!!!!

Ooh, glad I got that off my chest.  Scuse my french.

Hope to hear from you all soon

Lots of love
Vicster


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Well I am joining you all in having a break really as until my thyroid is sorted out there is no point ..so although he wants me to continue with the clomid ..I won't be ttc as such .. apparently there is a much higher risk of miscarriage when it is this far out ..so don't want to go through that heartache if I did get pregnant so worth waiting a couple of months at least I think .. 

Vicster you sound more upbeat now hun ..and no one would blame either of you for being little p heads lol..
you have been through a tough time ..so some time out will do you good.. 

Well I am on day 53 ..and despite taking Provera which ended a week ago I have still not come on ... getting a bit frustrated now as they can't do the blood tests until the nasty witch arrives .. I have even been asking them all to send me their nasty witch this cycle ..but to no avail!

Right off to bed ..hope you are ok Sarah and Susan x 
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hi Cat,
I didn't realise that you had to wait for more tests.  Kinda weird that we are all having to have time off together for whatever reason!
Cat's af - please arrive so that she can have some certainty and get on with things. 

Night night
x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ahhh thanks Vicster x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Still no AF .. it has one more day to arrive before I have my scan .. at least they will finally hopefully be able to tell me whats going on !!

How is everyone ? Its been quiet on here recently ..
Cat


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Cat
So how many days has that been? I'm still waiting too - on day 34 and it's very annoying as I was convince is was about to arrive over a week ago!  What kind of a scan are you having?  
I've had a stomach bug thing the last couple of days so not feeling too hot.  
Ta ta for now
vicx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

On about day 62 now Vicster ..have you done a test hun?

Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

woh..that's a long time.  Have you totally rules out being preggers?  No point in me doing a test as we've been abstaining!!! 
Hope you're enjoying this sunny day.  I'm off to see my friend belly dance!
x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Yes totally ruled it out ..even did another test yesterday cos you start thinking you must be going mad or preggars ..but I'm not either ..quite anyway lol 

Have fun watching your friend. 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls

Cat, I'm so sorry it's taking AF so long to get to you, nasty old    , hope she turns up soon for you, how did your scan go? 

Vicster I'm sorry to hear you've had a stomach bug, hope you're feeling better now and that you enjoyed seeing your friend belly dancing  

Susan hope you're OK hun and not missing your DH too much 

Sorry I have been AWOL for so long girls... had a bit of a nightmare time lately - builders have been here for what seems like forever, we have had loads of bad news about the house (basically it's a falling down turkey/money pit) DH's grandad died and his funeral was on Thursday, DH's dad has been really poorly (in hospital on morphine-type poorly) but is out again now, hopefully it was just a kidney stone but we had a bit of a cancer scare for a while, he had a scan and there was a big mass on his kidney, our next door neighbour has been horrible to us and everything is just a bit poo at the moment.  And I saw my adorable 8 month old niece today and I absolutely LOVE spending time with her but it makes me feel so, so sad afterwards    

Anyway enough of my whingeing.  Things could be so much worse.  I just think about Madeleine McCann's parents and then feel like giving myself a slap for being so self-pitying! It feels good to get my whinges off my chest though  

Hope you girls are all OK... lets hope we get a  on this thread before too long... 

Lots of love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Sarah .. ahhh sorry you are having a really sh**ty time of it at the moment .. and bless your poor hubby too his family are going through the wars .. its a nightmare having problems with neighbours too isn't it ..adn problems with your house on top ..no wonder you have not been on here hun ..not had much time I wouldn't have thought !! Hope it improves for you very soon hun x 

Well my scan totally confused me as according to my Dr I have just ovulated !! ..work that one out .. the only thing I can think is that the tiny pink smear I had on day 37 was in fact my period for that cycle ..so now I have missed this cycle alltogether but really good news that I ovulated ..shame I missed it tho eh!! ..typical eh if my scan had been last friday I would have been able to get donor involved but it was too late today it has already happened.. bit of a bummer but hey at least I am ovulating and that was without taking clomid that cycle so it must stay in your system for a bit .. 

So still waiting for AF .. just hope I get a recognisable one this time, the hospital have agreed to scan me next cycle as the OPK's don't really help me .. 

take care everyone Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Cat, I have just seen your new pic - how cute is that puppy?     Is he or she yours?  

and Vicster - when is your appointment?  It must be soon....

Right I'm off to bed now (house is so full of brick dust it's better to be asleep at the moment just to get away from it all)

xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

No just thought it was soooo cute ! We had labradors growing up and love them .. Night night hun ..you will wake up with black bogeys lol
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Cat we must have posted at the same time  

Great news that you have ovulated without the clomid hun!  And great news too that they're going to scan you next month, that should help you out a lot...  thanks for your kind words sweetie... DH and I were gutted tonight when we got home from work and found out the kitchen ceiling is only staying up apparently by some sort of miracle but like I said things could be worse and hopefully they will start improving soon!  At least the builders are eye candy   

Take care and will try to be back on line a bit more often!  Right I'm definitely off to bed now  

lots of love SarahP xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

OOh tasty builders .. lucky you lol..
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey sweeties!
While you were busy posting, I was trying to upload a wedding pic but it wouldn't work so I uploaded this one and its the wrong way up.... Help?!!!
So nice to hear from you Sarah.  Sounds like you really have been having a rubbish time all round.  I;m sorry to hear about your dh's relatives  -.  I really hope things get better soon for you both.   
Cat - that's cool that you've ovulated naturally but very frustrating for you that you missed this one.  Glad they're gonna scan you.

My appointment's on Thursday ..am starting to feel a bit anxious..almost feel like giving up at the moment cos it's all such a lot of bother, but then my want of a child is so strong I know I can't.  

Belly dancing was excellent last night - was in a silly mood and did lots of silly dancing! 
Vicxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

I've managed to put the picture the right way up! Still can't upload wedding pix - maybe the files are too big??

Cat - I remember seeing one of those questionnaires that you get friends to fill in to find out more about them on the general chit chat clomid thread.  Do you know where it is?  Thought it would be fun for us to do!
x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Cat...that dog is cute by the way.  I grew up with a friend's labrador. Have been meaning to put up a pic of my cat cos she looks just like the one you had on before (your cat I presume?)


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Found it.  Did it once and deleted it by mistake!  Look forward to reading your answers if you're up for it!

1. What time did you get up this morning? 8.30am (to be at work for 9am)

2. Diamonds or pearls? Blue Diamonds  

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Babel

4. What is your favourite TV show?Desperate Housewives

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? muesli and fresh strawberies or marmite on toast

6. Favourite cuisine? South Indian

7. What is your middle name? Louise

8. What food do you dislike? overcooked brussel sprouts, meat (except when I'm pregnant!), Macdonalds

9. What is your favourite CD at the moment? Prince Greatest Hits and Queens of the Stone Age (bit of a contrast!)

10. What kind of car do you drive? Vauxhall corsa

11. Favourite sandwich? Not that into sanrnies, but maybe a cheese toastie, or egg mayo

12. What characteristic do you despise? dishonesty,  cruelty etc

13. Favourite item of clothing? black "going out" top (from Primark!  Hope it never falls apart!); black, versatile linen summer skirt which I've lost and can't find a replacement - all the skirts at the moment are too poofy!, flip flops, red trainers, jeans

14. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would it 
be? South & Central america

15. What colour is your bathroom? Earthy colours with gorgeous mosiac tiles which have flashes of turquoise - my haven.  Shower room -Purple and white with black slate tiled floor

16. Favourite brand of clothing? In dreamland...Matthew Williamson, Roberto Cavelli.  In reality...charity shops, primark and m&s for ease

17. Where would you retire? penthouse falt in London & country house in Studland bay (Dorset) or Somerset/Avon....am holding out for dh's band to go platinum!

18. What was your most memorable birthday? 30th- friends, yummy food and silly games

19. Favourite sport to watch? wimbledon tennis and world cup footie

20. When is your birthday? 11 March

21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Night bird (see answer  to question 1!)

22. What is your shoe size? size 5 - like hands accordng to dh!

23. Pets ? Cat called Didi aged 4

24. What did you want to be when you were little? A dancer and stunt woman

25. How are you today? see previous posts

26. What is your favourite candy? black Wine gums and opal fruits (oops.. starburst)

27. What is your favourite flower? Sweetpeas and english country garden flowers (dunno names)

28. What is a date on the calendar you are looking forward to? 23 June - going to Padstow, Cornwall with friends


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

1. What time did you get up this morning? woke at 6am, got up as late as possible 7.15am

2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds 

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Happy Feet

4. What is your favourite TV show? Grays Anatomy/Top Gear/Grand Designs etc

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? toast or cereal

6. Favourite cuisine? Anything with a calorie lol bar offal

7. What is your middle name? Emma 

8. What food do you dislike? Offal..and food that I am dubious who has made it lol 

9. What is your favourite CD at the moment? Ooh too many to mention

10. What kind of car do you drive? An imaginery one  

11. Favourite sandwich? Brie and Cranberry melted on rosemary bread mmm

12. What characteristic do you despise? Meanness .. Cruelty

13. Favourite item of clothing? Jeans & Floaty tops

14. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would it 
be? On an island somewhere with palm trees .. lovely food and peace and sunshine ..not fussy where.. or New Zealand

15. What colour is your bathroom? Lilac and white

16. Favourite brand of clothing? Don't do brands anything that suits my style

17. Where would you retire? In the country ...

18. What was your most memorable birthday? The one when I got a fish tank with tropical fish for my birthday ..I was sooooe excited 

19. Favourite sport to watch? F1 and Rugby - preferably live 

20. When is your birthday? 10th July every year  

21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Night def ..although tired all the time at the moment ..

22. What is your shoe size? 5.5-6 depending on shoe

23. Pets ? Two cats Cleo and Bilbo One ginger and one tabby and white 

24. What did you want to be when you were little? A Nurse/Nanny and a Mummy

25. How are you today? Very well thankyou ..

26. What is your favourite candy? Ummm anything gooey and yummy and also Caramac, Frys Mint Creme, and Picnic lol (not that I am a chocaholic or anything!) 

27. What is your favourite flower? Freesia 

28. What is a date on the calendar you are looking forward to? 10th July my birthday for pampering..
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi everyone,

Sorry I haven't been on here for a chat lately.
I thought I'd have lots of spare time what with DH being away, but no thats not the case, I've been so busy with work and other stuff trying to find 5 mins to myself has been impossible.
I'm off work today, taken a lieu day as DH has been given a long weekend, so he is flying up from Bristol for the weekend, I cant wait to see him he been away 6 whole weeks.

Thats enough from me now, how have you all been keeping?
Good luck for your appointment today Vic   your pic is lovely you look so happy 

Sarah sorry to hear about your house, I hope it gets sorted very soon,

Hi cat good luck for this cycle sound good that you just ov'd   

Well I better get off to the airport 

Lots of love to you all, take care, talk soon

Susan xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Still no sign of AF for me .. hope you have a lovely weekend Susan, you must have really missed your other half!
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Cat – I enjoyed reading your answers!  Rosemary bread sounds yummy!
Ahh!!! We are in serious need of some af dances – I thought mine had arrived on Wednesday first thing and then it totally disappeared.  Have had browny stuff before but never this.  I was so convinced it was here that I booked in for my hsg and follow up appointment so it better come soon!

Susan – lovely to hear from you busy bee!  Have a fantastic weekend with your dh.  Yes, we look happy in that photo even though it wasn’t long after our first m/c – going away to Malta did us the world of good.

Sarah – hope things are looking up x

Well I had my appointment at the recurrent miscarriage clinic yesterday and I now feel that I’m in safe hands.  So far, he can’t see anything wrong (chromosomes are fine thank goodness)  but he’s done some more m/c specific tests and will then come up with a plan.  Until then, it’s no bms for us (sigh, but we have to be sensible – would kick ourselves if they found something wrong that can be treated).  His personal opinion is that we don’t need assistance with actually getting pregnant which I’ll discuss with my fertility guy when I next see him – they seem to know each other which is good.  He also needs my latest HSG results to check the structure of my womb, so I wish bloomin’ af would arrive – hasn’t been this long since Winter 05 . 

I’m such a stress bucket cos the longer we have to stay off trying, the nearer it gets to winter and I have this fear of being pregnant and getting the flu (I usually get the jab but wouldn’t if I was pregnant) Think I need to ask for reassurance about this next time I see him. He did say that the usual viruses that I always pick up woudn’t cause the miscarriages.

Anyway, I have a fun filled weekend ahead of me – am going to a rollerdisco tomorrow night (!) – better dig out some neon sweatbands!  I haven’t skated since I was 11! Have a great weekend everyone.

Love and cuddles to you all 
Vicx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vic ... I was told when I queried over the flu jab that they actually recommend you to have it whilst pregnant as flu would do you more harm than the injection ever would.. as I was unsure if I was pregnant at the time ..I have never had ill effects from the flu jab .. and I have had the pnuemonia jab too cos I am asthmatic. 

Good luck hun it sounds like he is being thorough which is good.. 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls  

Vicster I'm so glad to see that you now feel you're in safe hands, I'm sure they will be able to help you safely through a pregnancy before too long   hope you enjoyed the rollerdisco   and also hope the  turns up soon!   loving the new photo by the way 

Hi Susan I hope you're OK and that you had a lovely weekend with your DH   

Cat hope you're OK hun, I grew up with labradors too, in fact DH and I have got a huge chocolate labrador called Stilton, he's our furbaby  

Builders are back on thursday so more black bogeys on the way   (Cat you are hilarious!  ) DH and I have got our consultation on Thursday - feeling really quite   about it - especially as lovely Flowerpot got a BFN today after her IVF  

Hope you girls are all OK anyway,

lots of love SarahP xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,

Good luck with your appointmnet Sarah.  I hope you like your consultant and that he/she comes up with a plan     What are your builders actually doing? I've got lovely black bugers today from my trip on the underground  - yuk!

Well finally my AF arrived yesterday a couple of hours after I made the trek to the hospital and had my scan! Maybe it just needed a bit of prodding to get going properly! (maybe we should invest in some condoms!!)  So I've been vegging out on the sofa, I watched 4 epsisodes of Sex and the city last night - the ones when Charlotte is having difficulty getting pregnant and Miranda gets preggers unplanned - somehow it comoforted me as had two more pregancy announcements yesterday (close friend and cousin).

Cat - any sign of your af yet?  Its so horrid waiting. 

Susan - how was your weekend?


My dh looks a bit grumpy in this photo - he's usually really smiley!
x
xx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi everyone, hope you are all OK?

Thankyou all for asking how my weekend was, it was so nice to she DH after 6 whole long weeks, I was like a teenager   the time just went too fast though!!
Only another 10 days to go and he'll be back home again, needless to say only for 6 days then away again for another 3 weeks, the joys of being an army wife!!
I had to check today what CD I'm on as I had totally forgotten not being on the clomid this month   well as it goes I'm on CD30 so the old  should be just round the corner.
Sorry to go on about me I feel so selfish  

Vic just want to give you a huge   My best friend, she got married 3 months after me called me today and told me she was 12 wks pregnant, I'm really so happy for her and her DH as they are going to make fantastic parents and have longed for a child for so long, but always in the back of your mind theres that, I wish it was me, so some more    for you 

Good luck for your appointment Sarah lots of   coming your way I'll be thinking of you.

Hi   hope you are OK, any signs of the old  yet?

Going to close now as BB is on and I haven't really seen much of it this time.

Lots of   to you all talk soon

Susan xxx


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls  

Glad you had such a good weekend Susan, I didn't realise you were an army wife but my dad was in the RAF and I remember what it was like being part of a Forces family!  thanks for the good luck wishes for tomorrow  I am sort of looking forward to it in a wierd way    I know just what you mean about when you hear pregnancy announcments so I'm sending you a big  one day it WILL be you hun  

Vicster hello hun - I remember those horrible black boogers from when I lived in London!    I'd forgotten all about them...    i'm glad to hear AF finally turned up for you, were the results of the scan good?  I'm sending you a big  too for the pregnancy announcements, luckily for me I haven't had many lately but I suspect there will be a whole batch of 2nd baby pregnancy announcements soon so that'll be fun.  NOT!    I used to love Sex and the City, it's great isn't it?  Thanks for the good luck for tomorrow, I really hope they have got something positive to say   The builders are doing all sorts of stuff, we have had new windows put in and all the render taken off the house and replaced with lime render, a wall taken out of the kitchen, a bedroom divided into two, new bathroom, eventually new kitchen... the list goes on and on!  It's funny how you get used to living with brick dust and scaffolding (inside the house as well as out!) after a while!   I think you should definitely get some condoms by the way, DH produced a box of them the other day as we're not allowed to ttc till August   you might as well enjoy yourselves while you're waiting! 

Cat hope you're OK honey  

Anyway I'd better be off, lots to do...

lots of love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi everyone ..AF has well and truly arrived hurray   pampers here we come .. 

I have done a mad thing and went to see a house on Monday ..and what are we now wed and we already have a moving date of July 5th ..I have not even started packing yet .. we are being given the keys once we sign so that we can go in and measure up and decorate how cool is that ... it will be so great to move although I will be in the black bogey brigade as there is a lot of work to be done on it ..but mainly cosmetic rather than structural ..and need a lovely new big kitchen in it (I love my kitchen!) so will be busy busy busy!

Off to have blood tests tomorrow so hopefully they will sort out my thyroid soon and I won't be so tired !

Hope you are all well x 
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Bet you're relieved af has finally arrived Cat - I think our came at about the same time eventually!.  How did your appointment go today?

Sounds exciting about the new house?  Who will you be living with?  Sounds like you're a good cook!

TAke care love
Love to S and S
x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi girls  

Glad to hear AF finally turned up Cat, and hope they can get your thyroid sorted now!   your move sounds exciting... I am hoping to have a new kitchen before too long as well, I spend most of my time at home in the kitchen or it feels like it anyway!  Welcome to the black bogey brigade!  

Hello Vicster and Susan  hope you two are OK today...

DH and I went for our consultation today, it was so much better than I expected, DH's sperm sample was REALLY good - 25% normal forms which is a massive improvement and if he can produce a sample that good on the day of egg collection we won't need ICSI - hurrah!  AND we are starting IVF on day 21 of my next cycle - ie in about 4 weeks and 2 days - woo hoo!  I am really excited but quite  as well - gulp  

And when we got home this evening the house was still standing - the kitchen has no ceiling, but the house is still standing.  So that's a big plus!  

take care my lovelies

SarahP xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Oh Sarah, I'm so glad you're found a proactive clinic and that you're feeling positive about it. That is great news about your dh's swimmers - just goes to show how erratic they can be!  I expect that you'll be joining the ivf board for support, but please keep in touch here! It's funny how I feel so connected to and supported by the ff's I first engaged with on this fantastic website, even though we're having very different experiences now!

It must be exciting imagining how your house will look once the work is done - have you got ideas for decoration? Our house isn't in need of updating yet, but sometimes I want to change the cosmetic stuff but then don't manage to muster up the energy (or cash!)

Cat - how did the Thyroid stuff go sweetie?

I'm feeling pretty good today&#8230;.. glad that all my investigations are in place and excited that we may be able to start trying again in a couple of weeks once we've seen the miscarriage consultant for our results. Actually, that's all a bit scary but at least the things we're being tested for are treatable. I've started thinking that if we're given the all clear and that it's just down to bad luck then we may just continue trying naturally and put in for adoption - will see what the fertility guy says though cos (although I ovulate, things are a bit erratic and I do have PCO) and of course need to discuss with dh!! Ooh, rambling thoughts !!

As well as Sarah's positive news, I also learnt yesterday that one of my best friends had had a positive laparoscopy - she's had pretty bad endo and was expecting them to find that it had returned but they found nothing and everything looked normal. I'm so relieved for her.

We're off to Padstow tomorrow with above friend and partner and can't wait even thought the weather forecast is pretty awful! I'm sure it was scorchio this time last year!

Take care lovelies
Vicx <hugme>


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster hun, I'm glad you're feeling good, you sound really upbeat   I know what you mean about feeling connected with the people you first met on FF - I am just the same with you and Susan and Cat and the Ex Clomid Chicks    I haven't ventured on to the IVF boards yet - feel a bit nervous about it for some reason and it will be harder to keep up too with an extra board!    I have got loads of ideas for decoration which is lovely but it's really frustrating too because the decorating bit is still SOOO far off!  It will be really exciting if you can start trying again in a few weeks - it sounds like either way things are looking good for you, what with the things it could be being treatable   That's great news about your friend's laparoscopy and the endo not coming back!  Hope you have a lovely time in Padstow and that the weather's not too awful for you - say hello to Rick Stein for me!  

Cat hope you're OK honey and you too Susan - have a lovely weekend everyone,

lots of love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Ladies .. Had a chuckle at the black bogey thing    well I am painting and painting and painting this weekend .. it is all so yucky it needs paint throwing everywhere ..in fact I think I should reinact the Mr Bean scene where he blows up a paint can .. 

We can't decide which rooms to use for what which is quite funny I am even dreaming about it now .. the pros and cons of having the dining room separate ..or have that as the lounge .. everyone that sees it has differing opinions so I am totally confused now    but it will work itself out .. cos after tomorrow I will have painted some of the rooms and that will decide which room is what ..so no arguments after that .. 

Good news about the swimmers Sarah .. bet you are getting really excited now    

Vic ..Padstow is gorgeous isn't it ..I love it down there I would happily retire down the south west of England..hope you have a fab time and glad you are feeling positive, I had the blood tests this week for my thyroid as had to wait until between days 2-4 of AF as they were doing hormone tests as well ..and I have to go back on the 9th July and hopefully he will have the results back then and will be able to sort it out with my GP..

Hi Susan..hope you are well hun x  
Right off for more packing now !
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Cat good luck with the move honey!  I really don't envy you with all the painting mind you it will be my turn in a couple of months when all the structural stuff is done     

I am trying not to get too excited about the IVF, it still seems ages away yet!   every so often I get a bit "ooh in 2 months I could be pregnant" though  

Roll on 9th July and your results!  

Vicster hope you and DH have had a lovely time in Padstow hun  

Hi Susan hope you're OK sweetie  

lots of love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Sarah .. have you had a good weekend.. I had paint everywhere when I was done for the day ..on my arms legs face hair ..you name it lol   ..not looked for any black bogeys tho  

3 coats it took to cover the nasty smokey ceiling urgh !! I am thinking of duck egg blue in the kitchen with white cupboards and dark worktops.. I saw some gorgeous lights in Ikea ..so going to start collecting bits for it and will prob do the kitchen/diner next year..cos I want it really nice ..rather than rushing and not getting quite what I want .. I love cooking but my kitchen now is quite small .. so it will be nice to have more space..

I am sooo tired now zzzzzzzz  so sorry this is a crappy post .. will probably write a better one tomorrow when not so zzzz

Take Care all 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hello girls  

Cat your new kitchen colours sound lovely - I am toying with the idea of duck egg blue cupboards myself    can't decide between that or really rich creamy coloured cupboards and black granite style worktops.  Sounds like a good idea to save up for a bit and get what you really really like, it will be so worth it in the end.  Hope you've got all the paint off by now hun! 

Vicster and Susan hope you are both OK girls   

I'm fine, think AF will be here properly tomorrow which is quite exciting - only 3 weeks till IVF starts!  Woo hoo!  

lots of love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Sarah ... well I have been finding streaks in my hair lol .. great news that IVF is not far off .. got everything crossed for you hun x 

Yes I love the idea of duck egg blue ... the cream sounds nice as well tho with granite worktops I have a friend who did that and it looks stunning.. 

I am just not going to unpack half of my kitchen gadgets may as well leave them boxed up until I have got more cupboards and worktops to spread them around lol..

Ooh I will have more room for gadgets .. umm now what havn't I got .. always fancied having a really good juicer .. might get on a health regime and drink fresh juice every morning !! 

Right off to bed now as overslept this morning so need my zzz 

Hope everyone is ok x 
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Cat, juice sounds like an excellent plan hun and it will be lovely to unpack all your gadgets once you are all decorated, it'll be like Christmas!  Hope you slept well last night and managed to get up on time this morning!

Vicster and Susan  chicks  hope you're both OK

love SarahP xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Sarah I did ha ha ..good job seeing as my boss was picking me up lol .. absolutely surrounded by boxes now .. moving a few over the weekend .. hurray ! 

Sorry not doing very in depth posts but still manically packing !
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Keep on packing Cat!    Hope you have a nice weekend, don't overdo it!


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello,I'm back!  
Hope the moving and building are going well Cat and Sarah!  How are you Susan?

We had a great time in Cornwall even though the weather was pretty horrible!  We did lots of walks along the beach and cliffs and even went in the sea one mad early morning after a jog on the beach!!  We also ate lots of ice cream and cream teas!!! Yum.  

Have just got back from an appointment with fertility consultant at Hammersmith.  Everything with me is fine after the miscarriages - no blockages/scarring etc but dh's results are still fairly rubbish.  If we do want to have assistance then we'd have to have ivf.  The thought of ivf is scary as I'm such an anxious person, but then so is the thought of waiting for things to happen naturally.  So, we're going to mull over things and wait for our miscarriage results which we will get next week.

Lots of love
Vicx  

A


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

to you Vicster ..do you think you will be more anxious doing IVF than Clomid, I bet you would take it day by day and work through it with lots of support from your friends on FF sending you lots of     for your decision hun x 

Sarah .. I am painting again today ..so not sure if it will be black bogey brigade ..more like splodges in the hair, arms, etc etc everyone laughs at how far I can spread the stuff !  

Susan ..Hope you are ok hun and having a good weekend x

Right better pack some more bits !
Cat x


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## SarahPooh (Nov 7, 2006)

Hi Vicster, it sounds like you had a fab holiday! mmmm, ice cream and cream teas  I haven't eaten anything like that for AAAGES!    Great news that you are all OK after the miscarriages hun but sorry to hear about DH's results.  Has he tried acupuncture?  My DH's results have been consistently pretty rubbish but when we went to Holly House they had improved quite dramatically - he has been having acupuncture for a while, and taking Zita West vitamen supplements with DHA capsules as well, and extra carnitine and arginine supplements which are supposed to help sperm. You probably know all this already but just in case!    I know what you mean about the thought of IVF being scary  and it is a big decision but we are getting used to the idea now.

Cat hope you manage to get all the paint off one day!    Good luck with the packing hun.

Susan hope you're OK duckie  

Better get on with the tesco shopping now  

lots of love to all,

SarahP xxx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hello Ladies,

Hope you all had a great weekend?

Cat hows the move going? they say that moving can be one of the most stressful times!
I hope that this is not the case, I was thinking about you the other day when someone made a comment to me....
Well as you know I'm due to move in August and someone said "well you know what they say new house new baby" 
to be honest with you I have never heard this saying before in my life but lets hope it's true hey   

Sarah hows you? not long to go now   how exciting, are you nervous? just try and stay calm and all will be just fine, millions of    coming your way.

Hiya Vic, glad you had a good holiday sounded lovely, good luck for your test results this week   

DH is home at the moment till Sat then he is away for another 3 weeks, so we are making the most of our time together.
Still no AF yet CD 43 this is the longest its been but I'm putting it down to the fact that its my first clomid free cycle (.)(.) have gotten quite delicate over the past few days so I think shes on her way?

Better go and peel some spuds as DH will be home from work soon, 

take care,

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey Susan - glad you're having some fun with your dh.  Fingers crossed that the lack of af is a bfp   

Hope Susan and Cat are having a good day.

Just a quickie as I'm ill (again) and my head is banging.  Feeling down today- reckon it's cos we can't try at the moment and the uncertainty of everything. 
Oh well, after a low, usually a high and hopefully we'll be given the go ahead to ry again on Thursday - it has been to long!

Have a nice evening
Vicx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hey girls, hope you had a good day.
My day was going ok until one of the external facilitators we use popped in, crept up at me from behind and shoved an early scan picture of her grandchild in front of my face, gushing about how excited she was!  It really took me by surprise and all I could say was "cool" and luckily she left so i could escape to the toilets for a cry.  She guessed what why my reaction had been uncomfortable and why, telling my colleague that she felt really bad!  Of course she wasn't to know. Scan pictures always trigger my grieve at my losses and I just didn't have time to prepare myself!  I was also in the middle of reading an email from a pregnant friend, so it was triggers from all angles!  Anyway, I soon got over that one when dh phoned to say our dinner with another couple had been cancelled as one of them has gone missing overseas while on business.  It is all very weird  and upsetting - am kind of in shock about it at the moment. I pray for his safe return.  

Anyway,  hope to hear from you lovelies soon
Vicx


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all,

Oh Vic   hope your day is going much better today 
It is hard to deal with, even though you're happy for the person and wish them all the joy in the world etc
They don't know, deep down thats all you want in the whole world and that it just seems to happen so easily for the people we know but not us.
Let me tell you this, it is going to happen and it will happen, just when the time is right, so we have alot to look forward too 
I hope your DH's friend is ok and that everything is fine 
Please stay    Vic as I don't like it when I know you're feeling down 

                 

A happy dance for you,
Take it easy talk soon

Susan xxx


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Aww Sarah, thanks for you sweet message.  Made me smile and almost cry!
Am feeling much better today.  Our friend is ok - bit of a bizarre sstory which I can't really go into as it involves royalty!!

hope yo uare all ok


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Howdy,
Just thought I'd update you after my consultation with the miscarriage specialist....
Turns out that I have Anti-phospholipid antibody syndrome which means that I have antibodies which circulate in my blood and cause blood clots in the placenta. There were a few tests which confirmed this and apparently I had a really high positive for one of them which he rarely sees.  Fortunately, it is treatable so when I'm next pregnant ( ) I have to take aspirin and inject myself daily with heparin (ahh!).  My risk of miscarriage with treatment is still higher than people with nothing wrong but not by too much.  I feel relieved that we have an answer but also a bit upset when I think of my body attacking those little beans we were so lucky to conceive, but I know I couldn't control it then.
This consultant's advice is keep trying another 6 months and then think again about IVF if we've had no joy.
So, its time for some  !!


I hope yuo are all ok.  Looking foward to hearing from you      
Speak soon
Vicxxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vicster that is great news hun that you knows whats going wrong so they can put it right next time you are preggars which we hope to be very very soon     

Well all moved now and unpacking boxes every day .. ridiculous how much stuff I have got .. I must be a real hoarder !

Hello to everyone else hope you are all ok x 
Cat


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello everyone,

I'm back from Sunny Spain!  How are you all - any good news   ??

We had a fantastic time - did lots of body boarding and playing on the unspoilt beaches (we went to the North West).  We saw dolpins which was amazing! Was funny as the day before dh thought he'd seen a shark while he was body boarding on his own quite far out, but it must have been a dolphin!  Bless him, he was really scared!! We really managed to relax and forget all our troubles which was great.  The flight home was pretty horrible though as we flew right into that storm! I've never been so frightened on a plane! It was shaking and dropping and felt really unsafe!  The pilot told us we had 10 minutes to landing and 30 minutes later we were ascending again (at that point I thought we might have been taken hostage - I have a very vivid imagination!) It took us about an hour to land!
Anyway, back safely but have a bad cold and cough (maybe too much time in the chilly sea!) so am spending the day relaxing and reading the new Harry Potter book!!

Cat - glad you're all moved.  What's the latest on your thyroid?
Sarah - how's all the preparations going for the ivf? 
Susan - how's everything?  Is hubby back?

Thinking of you all and sending you lots of  

Love Vicx
(who feels lie she's been away for ages!)


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vicster..glad you had a great time..good idea to escape the horrible weather we have been having !! 

Thyroid was borderline so they said they don't need to do anything but from talking to girls on here 4.5 is too high as it should be between 1-2 ..I am going to have to change Drs (GP) so will ask the new one if they will refer me..cos I hav classic symptoms of underactive thyroid.. cold all the time..low temps etc.. so need to push it. 

Donor on again for this next cycle should come on at any time now (hopefully!) 

How is everyone else doing ? Did I tell you I LOVE MY NEW HOUSE !! ha ha have wallpaper half stripped off and place is a real mess but I love it !!
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Helloee,

Cat - that must be sooo frustrating about your Thyroid.  Always good to get a second opinion.  Yippee you're donor is on for next month.  Fingers crossed!  

Hey S and S.

xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ooh Vicster I like your dragonflies x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Cheers Cat, we had lots of dragonflies at our wedding!  I love them!

I'm almost too scared to say this but I've got a BFP!!  Had an inkling when I had a tiny bit of spotting last week and then came down with a cold. We only started trying again after our diagnosis so am very shocked it has happened so quickly, especially due to dh's swimmers.  Have been really stressing as my prescription for the aspirin and heparin which I'm meant to start taking on a positive HPT hadn't arrived at my GPs.  HAve got them now and my misacarriage speciailst has reassured me that it isn't too late. Dh is injecting me as I'm too squeamish at the moment! I am of course very scared.

Oh ladies, I really hope that you too get a BFP soon.  I think of you often and pray that you will get some joy.

Vicster
xx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vicster that is fab news hun xxxxxx

    

[fly]          [/fly]
Cat x


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## susamwalker2002 (Nov 27, 2006)

Hi all  

I was just having a quick read of the boards, I haven't had much time lately as I've been working like mad.

Vic, huge great big massive congrats to you and your DH, I am so happy for you and pray that all will go well for you, lots of    

Cat I'm glad you love your new house (I hope I'll love mine too)

DH is home now he came home on Sat, thank goodness it's been a very long 3 months!!! (bar 5 days) so it's too late for trying this month as AF should be here next week, but hopefully next month  

well I'll love you and leave you,

Talk soon

Susan xxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi Susan .. aww it must be really frustrating for you missing this cycle, I have not heard from my donor yet so I am hoping he has not gone awol lol

Its fab news about Vicster isn't it ..I pray it is a healthy and happy 9 months for her x 

There have been at least 3 BFP's on this clomid site this month ..which is fab news ! 

I hope you will love your house hun .. I love mine even though it is stripped wallpaper walls and needs everything doing to it ..I can really imagine a baby in there which I couldn't in my old place .. so fingers crossed we all need a nursery soon x 
~ Cat


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Hello!

So nice to hear from you Susan, you busy bee!  I'm so glad your dh is back with you so you can get down to things properly!  ARe you prepared for your move?  Must be soon??

Thanks for the congrats -was a bit of a shock as happened so quick.  We are very anxious and are praying that the drugs work.  I'm covered in bruises from the injections which is quite normal as the aspiin is thinning my blood - not down to dh's jabbing technique I've been reassured! I really can't bring myself to do it myself yet!

CAt - I hope your donor gets in touch soon.

Sarah - lots of love to you.I hope things are going well with the ivf.


  ...please babydust fairy, give Cat, Sarah and Susan a bfp soon.

Love vicxx


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Ahhh thanks Vicster ..Sarah how are you ?? where are you ?? have I forgotten you are on holiday or something  
Cat x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

hope everone has a great weekend ..I have got insommnia again ..its been a while but my old friend has come back   shame there isn't a 
yawn sigh on here  

                  
Cat x


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## vicster (Dec 16, 2006)

Cat babe, sorry to hear the insomnia has started again - are you back on the Clomid?  Maybe it's the antcipation of starting things rolling again.
I hope you manage to get some shut eye.
How are you apart from that?  News from your donor?
x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Vicster glad you are ok hun x 

No news ... its driving me mad and presume he doesn't want to do it but too chicken to say so.. I had a really long chat with a close male friend last night and he may be interested .. and he would make a great Dad, he talked to me from about 9pm til 1am from Italy !! so fingers crossed..will be too late for this month but another month maybe    
Cat x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Hi everyone ..well an update ..he did finally come through which he tends to do most times but its the trauma of the is he ..isn't he .. have I wasted another cycle.. not sure if I caught ovulation but have been doing ov tests since and they have been negative ..so carrying on with those .. 

How are you all ?
Cat x


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## wouldloveababycat (Mar 21, 2004)

Its all gone quiet on this thread ..how the devil are you all ??

Cat x


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