# What would you do or say??



## superal (May 27, 2005)

Hi

I know none of you have a child old enough as my DS who is adopted but just wanted your view/opinions/ideas as to what you would do or say to the following!

Right my DS who is 14 has just been involved in another fight, something all boys go through at some stage in their life and part of growing up BUT the reason my son hit another lad is because of the comments this boy has made to my son.

The boy turned around to my son and said "at least I have a proper Mum & Dad" 

An argument has erupted and DS has punched this boy in the face.

Part of me feels proud that DS has stuck up for himself and his sister as this boy has also pushed my DD off her bike.

I've told DS that fighting is not the answer & it takes a braver man to walk away from a situation like that but at the same time I am proud of him for sticking up for his sister and what he believes but maybe next time say to the boy " I dare you to go and say that to my Mum & Dad!" ( He would get a right ear bashing!!!! )

What would you do??

Any advice would be appreciated!

How dare he say I'm not his proper Mum, oh the anger is coming out now!! 

Love
Andrea
xx


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## Pooh bears mummy (Jul 11, 2004)

Hi Andrea,

Not sure what to say, in some way its welldone to you DS but like you say fighting is not the answer. 

Good Luck with that one.

PBMx


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## superal (May 27, 2005)

Well fighting is not the answer but we've since come up with strategies to calm DS temper when it comes to a situation like he found himself in yet again! 

It takes a braver person to walk away but if that won't work there is a number of things he could say, the best would be to try to say it to my face!!  Or he could say my parents are not made of plastic there real you know!!

Lets just hope we don't have a repeat of the situation again, DS is luck this boy did not press charges but to be fair if he did we would have done the same as this other boy hit DS with a brick, at least DS did not use any weapon of any sorts, it could have been so much worse!

Thankyou to the 2 members who replied.

Love
Andrea
xx


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## keemjay (Jan 19, 2004)

didnt see this before andrea..i'm not surprised this boy pushed a button in your DS, he must have been terribly hurt and poss confused as to what to do himself, it sounds like he did the only thing that he knew how to do and that was use his fists.
anger management sounds a bit extreme i know but perhaps google it and see if theres any tips you can find for helping DS control his anger at times like this...counting to ten, walking round the corner and deep breathing or just a few phrases he could learn and have at the ready...
theres lots of teen type websites out there..teen issues is one i think.
i guess also remember that hormones dont help either 
hope that helps 
kj x


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## cindyp (Apr 7, 2003)

Just seen this Andrea, not sure what to say but I think you took the best course of action.  Fighting is not the best answer but you did right to show that you are proud of his intentions.

Best of luck, I must admit I'm slightly nervous of the teenage years at least I have a bit of a wait yet.

love
Cindy


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## jilldill (Feb 2, 2006)

Hi Andrea,
Sorry I have only just seen this too. I agree with Cindy, you should be proud of him but as has already been said fighting isn't the way! This is such a hard one I think you are dealing with it all really well boy these challenges are sent to try us!!!
Good luck love JD x


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