# Don't know if I belong here but would like to join you



## Rachel2 (Oct 3, 2004)

Hi - I have a lovely dd (3 in June) who we conceived thru iui on 2004 (1st try!) - and now we are having problems trying to make her a brother or sister. So not sure if it is secondary infertility as we has problems ttc dd too iykwim. Anyway - it would be nice to be able to moan about ttc no 2 without feeling guilty that many ladies on FF haven't even got one child. af has started after 3rd try at iui - on paper everything was perfect - even better than when we conceived dd - and I have taken it really badly. The last 2 failed cycles I coped much better - but today I am being a really rubbish mummy - watching tv and trying to hold back tears and poor dd getting on with playing on her own. I'm sure she is wndering what the matter is - I have told her I have a poorly tummy and I don't think she's picked up on me crying as she would definitely mention it! I fell so guilty for not giving her a sibling and worry about her in the future being alone. I love her so much it hurts - and I'm also feeling guilty that txt is giving me days like today when I'm not being fun and playing with her. Everyone in my antenatal group is either pg or has already had no 2 and people keep asking if we are going to have more - implying dd should not be made to be an only child. To top it off, yesterday dd asked for the first time if she could be a big sister. I feel so useless - and I've put on weight and feel like a beached whale. We are going to Center Parcs in a couple of weeks - and I imagined going pg. Now I've got to put my swimming costume on and feel huge without the secret knowledge of being pg. I know this is shallow but it is just ANOTHER thing making me down. Going on a strict diet anyway - if I can't be a mum again at least I can be slim! Anyway - sorry for going on- and hope I am OK to joiin this board. I'm not always this negative - honest   xxx


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## SUSZY (Nov 3, 2006)

Hi RAchel
Welcome to FF and to 2ndry and even more welcome to our world, we all know EXACTLY what you are thinking and feeling on all counts so you will feel right at home here, please come over the the daily chat thread (currently April/May) there are a lot of us on there and it does take a while to get to know everyone but there are new people joining all the time and we are a great bunch.
Its so nice to come on here and rant and rave at all the things that most normal fertile people dont have to endure and most of us have done that and got the t shirt and are weary but we still keep going.
Come over and join and us and we look forward to getting to know you better.
love
susie


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## Rachel2 (Oct 3, 2004)

Thanks for the lovely welcome - I'll post on the thread x


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## ~SUGAR~ (Mar 25, 2006)

Hi Rachel

Sorry to hear you're so low hunni 

So many of us on the board understand 100% how you're feeling right now.

Please feel free to join us on the 'hoping for another miracle' thread. We are all in the same boat. 
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=138037.msg2115053#new

And also there's the 'Fat Club - losing the baby weight' thread too,if you're interested, seeeing as you are embarking on a diet. http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=133283.330

There's so much support on this site, and everyone on the threads I've suggested is just lovely.

Take care, Love Jo xx


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