# infertility scares me



## goldbunny (Mar 26, 2012)

The word 'infertility' scares me, and i don't even know what it means.
I want to be somebody's mother, and pass on my flaws and my genes.
To wake up at three in the morning, and not be alone with a sigh -
instead to see soft baby sleeping, or giving a bit of a cry.
I'm tired of watching in silence, of thinking 'When is it my turn?',
while all those around me are parents, who don't understand my concern.
So am I infertile already, because there is no 'little one',
or is infertility only, that blackness when all hope is gone?
I thought i'd have more understanding, that it would all make perfect sense -
i had no idea time was so short, or that feelings would be so intense.
I thought i could trust in the system, that asking for help was enough
but doctors waste time that i can't spare, and then say 'it's too late, so tough'.
I'm hanging on here by a lifeline, i'm praying for my time to come -
unless i am part of a family, this isn't a life: i'm just numb.
So many years waiting and waiting, just waiting for my life to start
i promise you babies if you come, i'll give you the whole of my heart. 

*


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## ilovekids (Aug 12, 2011)

Oh, a big   to you! That is such an emotional poem, reflects the thoughts of myself and so many people in the same boat. Good luck with your treatment.


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## Raymondo (Feb 18, 2012)

Always have hope in your heart
It can happen
Good luck honey.
X


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## Mr &amp; Mrs Bubble (Oct 19, 2011)

Goldbunny had to leave a comment. Your poem is so beautifull and very poignant.
I could have written that myself at 3am as I lie inbed wishing I was being woken for the 8th feed of the night, a hole left by the absence of the little soul thats light hasnt even been ignited yet. 

Lets hope our little sparks light the dark soon xxxxx


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Goldbunny that is lovely and so well written and so emotional. In fact, at 3am today I was woken by my agonising endo pain and could hear the baby next door crying - it just broke my heart that little bit more. 

Thank you for writing this and sharing it - I needed to read this today more than you can know  

Sending you lots of love and hope x


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## Tulipwishes (Nov 20, 2011)

This is so well written with a lot of emotion which we can all relate to.

I'm sending you lots of luck xx


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## Lannypoo (Jan 19, 2012)

Wow goldbunny so true.... Xxx


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## greatgazza (May 27, 2010)

That's beautiful goldbunny.

I truly hope that some time very soon you are being woken at 3am for very different reasons and have the chance to give a lucky LO your heart   

GGx


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