# Should I try again?



## Shell15 (Nov 11, 2011)

Hi ladies 

I have not posted on ff for a long time since my third BFN in May.  I finally attended my follow up today after putting it off.  We both went in there knowing that this was the end of our IVF journey but then after what our consultant said I am now unsure what to do   He said that I was his first patient that dhea has worked this well for.  My first cycle I didn't take dhea and got 5 eggs 3 were mature and only 1 fertilised -BFN, took dhea for 3 months got 8 eggs 3 mature and 2 fertilised with a 3 day transfer - BFN, increased dhea from 50 mg to 75 mg a day for 3 months and got 11 eggs 9 mature and 6 fertilised and we went to blast but still a BFN.

After our second failed cycle consultant told us not to bother going ahead with third and to use donor eggs so he was shocked as to the amount of eggs I got and said that he would advise me now to use own eggs and that it would be difficult decision to say no more now with such a good third cycle.  

I really don't know what to do I said once I was 40 I would not be doing this again plus we have already spent £18,000 and I am not sure about this emotionally.

But like everybody we all want a baby.  I have DS who is 7 and the fact he wants a sibling makes it even harder.

I never thought I would come out of that room today debating whether to cycle again we had already decided it was a no.  I cannot stop  

after our second cycle we said no more but then thought third time lucky and really thought with such good results it was going to be a BFP but it wasn't meant to be again!

I have nobody to discuss it with as we didn't tell anybody we had been through a third cycle only my mum and one girl in work.  I have sisters and brothers but don't want to tell them.  

Michelle x


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## teapot73 (Jul 6, 2013)

Hi, I'm very sorry to hear about your BFN, the DHEA indeed worked for your eggs quantity. Only you and your husband know when to stop the treatment, you might find that if you try not to think about it for some time, the right decision will come.
It took me over a year to start planning our next step as it was so difficult psychologically and financially to cope with another failed IVF attempt. I will be 40 in a few months and so far decided that we'll try again with own eggs just once but if it does not work, I might consider donor eggs. I used DHEA in one of the protocols and the follicules' growth was extremely slow and improved only when I stopped taking it mid-protocol so I won't use it again. 
Good luck and stay strong! x


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## Shell15 (Nov 11, 2011)

Hi Teapot I've just noticed that you had treatment at the Hewitt centre and now care Manchester I have had all my treatments at the Hewitt centre.  Can I ask why you have moved to Manchester? I wonder whether I should move after 3 bfns with the same clinic but I do really like the care they provide and they do their best but its just me can't keep hold of my embryos  

Michelle


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## teapot73 (Jul 6, 2013)

Hi, Shell15, our first 2 attempts on NHS were with Hewitt Centre and to be honest I was not impressed as I felt like on the conveyer belt - the same protocols (just lowered the stimms dose as during 1st cycle got overstimulated and could not proceed to embryo transfer), no explanation and no further investigations during follow-up appointments. After 1st cycle of treatment we had 9 frozen embryos and they thawed 6 for the first FET. After that we asked for a more experienced embryologist and for 2nd FET they got 3 out of 3 frozen ones. Many people are happy with Hewitt Centre though and get BFPs so I guess we were just unlucky with them.


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## gnc (Sep 13, 2013)

Hi Shell 15! I recommend you, PGD (Genetic Test) should be done for your embies. Because after 38 all eggs are getting old and somehow they are loosing their genetic quality. 80% of embryos pgd results give abnormal embryo which they will not work to get pregnant. in 10 embryos they may find 1 healthy normal embryo if we are lucky. If they use that healthy embryo your chance is 70% just like young ladies. At least after 3 cycles you will be able to decide what to do clearly.


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## dillydolly (Mar 11, 2005)

Shell15

I am in a similar dilemma to you

I already have a child but number 2 isn't happening. I was with care in the past and they recommended array to screen the eggs. I asked about DHEA but they said there was not research etc so I didn't used it. I did an IVF cycle abroad as for me it was less hassle to incorporate it as a holiday. I have heard mixed things about DHEA but it seems to have helped you

I got 6 eggs and 5 fertilised. I was expecting to get none and the clinic were really surprised I got 5 but none made it to day 3! They have put it down to old eggs, I'm just 42 and crap sperm. They have suggested trying OE again with a back up of DE but I don't think I can take the upset of my eggs failing after fertilisation again. I think I would have rather got no eggs than to go through what happened again

I asked about PGD / array at my new clinic but they said that we need a good number of eggs for it to be of use as some damage can occur to the eggs

So I am now trying to decide what to do OE once more or DE! DE has a higher success rate, OE has a lower success

I suppose you, like me, have to think what's most important, is it to have a child or is it to have your genetic child

Why can't things be easier to decide!


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