# Newbie TTC 2nd child



## smc72 (Jul 5, 2011)

Hi everyone

Thankfully after surfing through the site, gonna take the plunge and request can I please join you?

Well here goes….our first attempt at pregnancy in Aug 2003 was successful in the first cycle (couldn’t believe it but ecstatic) sadly miscarried at 13 weeks on the day I was to have my first scan.  

With one thing and another I left things for a while and started trying again June 2005, this time it took about 10 months to get pregnant but again miscarried, at 6wks in May 2006.  

However lady luck shined on us and 2 months later I was pregnant again   and we had our beautiful son in March 2007 by emergency c-section.  Despite the tough labour, not getting the natural birth I had so hoped for and the fact I’d previously had Strep B, I was just delighted with my wee bundle and just glad he was here safe and sound. 

DH and I were happy to get started at the baby making straight away but sadly it wasn’t to be, after being tested for everything (including thyroid for me) and a laparoscopy Feb. 2010 we were told we had unexplained secondary infertility   and the consultant whipped the rug out from under me when he said we would need IVF!  I believe I am in denial and truly believed I would get pregnant on our own before the IVF came around, but wasn’t to be and I started D/R on the suprecur nasal spray on 16/06/11 and am due to start Gonal-f injections on 07/07/11.

Everywhere I go I seem surrounded by pregnant women and if my mother says to me just once more that I just need to relax and it will happen/that she had no problems getting pregnant, I think I will scream!  

Anyway if you got this far thanks for reading and I wish each and every one of you lots of  ***~love~***~light~***~baby-dust~*** 

Sonya


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## Smurf2 (Mar 4, 2011)

Hi Sonya

Just wanted to say you are not alone.  My situation is slightly different in that i have low amh / poor ovarian reserve, but i have similar feelings to you.  It is also tough when ivf is seen as the 'only' answer to getting pregnant.  It was 'only' 18 months ago that i was pregnant naturally with our second - which i sadly lost.  But since then it seems we can't conceive naturally, or who knows maybe we can still can, but have to give it time....it is just the unknown  with the added pressure that my fertility is lower than it should be for my age.
I am with you that no-one can quite understand how this feels until you go through it.  I have friends all at varying stages with pregnancy, children, etc. but i now seem to be the only one who is having problems.
I am hugely grateful for having had a normal pregnancy, but it is that uncertainty of whether it will happen again....and since the fertility treatments there isn't much 'normality' left!
smurf2


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## smc72 (Jul 5, 2011)

Hi smurf2

Thanks for getting in touch. 

You are right it is a lonely path at times and the uncertainty is crushing and it appears that everyone is making babies at a great rate and their only problem is preventing it!  I found it hard to come to terms with the fact that my body was not doing what I thought it should easily do and after 4yrs ttc I think I am resigned to 'handing it over' so to speak and am trying to remember that by doing just that I am taking control and it makes me even more grateful that I have my DS.  I had a lovely pregnancy with him and really enjoyed being pregnant which surprised me (although the fear of M/C never left me the whole time)  After much soul searching I have decided to give the IVF a try (we get one free procedure here) as I felt that on down the line I may regret not giving it a go and I am just taking it one day at a time, so here's hoping. 

Keep on trying and hoping, never say never!


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## Bubblicious (Jul 8, 2010)

We're also struggling with unexplained secondary fertility and struggled for a long while to accept that IVF might be our only option.  However, I started DR last Saturday so I am feeling hopeful.

Wishing you lots of luck  .


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## smc72 (Jul 5, 2011)

Bubblicious said:


> We're also struggling with unexplained secondary fertility and struggled for a long while to accept that IVF might be our only option. However, I started DR last Saturday so I am feeling hopeful.
> 
> Wishing you lots of luck .


Hi Bubblicious

I hope your D/R is going ok for you, sorry its taken me so long to reply, I'm new to this (both the IVF and the website) and am very much getting to grips with navigating my way around but I am improving....slowly! Have moved on quite abit through the IVF journey and had my ET 24/07/11, 2 embies on board, so am just hoping and  that they stick .

Sending you loads of luck and  x


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## Smurf2 (Mar 4, 2011)

smc72 and bubblicious - good luck with your cycles.  I think it does help to feel like you are taking action, but at the same time it is still a scary time with uncertainties.

Am also in the midst of a cycle - going back for our two frozen embryos (donor eggs).  However, a scan to check my lining (ironically lining was excellent), showed at least one blocked fallopian tube.  All a shock to me as have never had any problems with my plumbing before - i have low amh / poor ovarian reserve, but this is another blow to me.  We are having another scan (at the clinic in Spain) the day before transfer to review what the situation is and whether to proceed or not with the transfer.  Fluid has been noted in the tube so for me i sort of want to postpone this transfer if i have fluid which may scupper any possible pregnancy.

So i'm a little fed up to know that i have something else working against me and to know that this really won't help any slim chances i thought i had of natural conception. Argh!  On the positive side, at least this was picked up now so action can be taken if needed, as i kind of get the feeling it was just noticed in passing during the scan, as the main point of the scan was to check my lining.

Also, bizarre/annoying to have quite a few of the boards on this forum applicable to me....secondary infertility, premature ovarian failure, tubal problems, donor egg bit...etc!  So i'm posting/lurking on quite a few boards at the moment


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## looking-fear-in-the-face (Sep 29, 2011)

I hope things are going well for you all. I've got a little boy who's nearly 3. Just before I had him I had a miscarriage at 5 weeks. Then I got pregnant with him straight away and had a few scares during pregnancy and a really tough pregnancy with pretty much everything happening to make it as uncomfortable and scarey as possible, and then a postpartum haemorrhage after the labour. However, I got my wonderful son as a result of this and am so grateful for that. This last year I've had 2 miscarriages, a missed miscarriage in January when I was 11 weeks (baby died at 9 weeks) and then an early miscarriage at 5 weeks in May. I have no understanding at all of why this happened. I nagged and nagged for a referral to a consultant and then pleased with the consultant to do some tests, but the tests they finally did for sticky blood / clotting disorder and translocation genetic problems came back normal. The consultant and the nurse at the clinic told me the miscarriages could have been due to stress (after I told them I did ovulation tests, and they said I was obviously stressing if I did them!). And they also said that stressing over th epostpartum haemorrhage I had previously might be causing the miscarriages. I feel so at a loss with this. I never thought fertility would be so very complicated (after years of "preventing pregnancy"!). And I feel so little is being done to help me. Previous pregnancies have happened fairly quickly for me (within 3 months) however they dont "stick". And now it's been 4 months since my last miscarriage and my hormones and ovulation seem all over the place. I wonder if I'll ever get pregnant again. And I hink Im going to have to wait it out until next May before they'll do anything as I've heard you have to have been trying for a year with no success of getting pregnant before they'll intervene? 
At least a lot of people on this website seem to have had their fertility looked into, and that gives me hope that mine will eventually be looked into more seriously. This is all so hard.
I wish everyone here lots of luck with having the family that they dream of x


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## imthebeckster (Sep 28, 2011)

Hi Girl, Im A newbie to FF and think this is the group for me...
My Story..
My Dh and I started TTC straight after we got married it took us 9month,and has a beautiful daughter  (3.5yrs old)We have been TTC ever since she was born and had no such luck,Started to get upset as everyone was having babies apart from me! and my younger sister is on her second (was really heart wrenching when i found out)Went to the doctors and dh had SA which was absolutly devastating news 1% Mortality  I completely shut down!anyway the doctor has said that ivf was our answer but as we have already got a child the NHS were not going to fund us ,Even more devastated.Anyway we had our first consultation at lwc last wednesday and it all went pretty well,Just waiting for dh sa results and bt results for egg sharing x


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## aquapinkdog (Dec 23, 2010)

Hi,
I can completely relate to your story. 
We have a fab 4 year old, and have been trying for another one for just under 2 years. We went to the docs after 9 months of trying as I was coming up to 35, and after endless tests DH's sperm came back as no motility. He went on to have 3 more tests of which 2 more had no motility and 1 had 5% motility. We were both gutted. The specialist told hubby to give up alcohol completely, stop riding a bike and take 1500mg vit c and 600iu vit e a day for 4 months. He did it all. Went for a private test and it came back pretty rubbish again.
0% grade a, and 2 % grade b (slow swimmers), so still a remote possibility it could happen naturally (again), but highly unlikely.

We were both shocked as DS was conceived easily, so we had no idea we would have problems second time around.

We signed up for ICSI pretty much there and then and were due to start in September, but by coincidence we had our follow up NHS appt the same week. I went along thinking they would say there's nothing else they could do for us (as that's what he said at our previous appt if the results were still poor) but instead he put me on clomid, with the logic there's more eggs for the sperm to aim at. He admitted it was a longshot, but thought it was worth trying for 3 months. At the time I agreed, but 2 months on, I'm wishing we'd just got on with ICSI. I'm now resigned to starting ICSI in January.

I know we are very blessed to have DS but I don't think people comprehend how hard secondary infertility is unless they've been there.

I wish you the very best of luck with the whole process and  we all get our BFP's soon.

Fx



imthebeckster said:


> Hi Girl, Im A newbie to FF and think this is the group for me...
> My Story..
> My Dh and I started TTC straight after we got married it took us 9month,and has a beautiful daughter  (3.5yrs old)We have been TTC ever since she was born and had no such luck,Started to get upset as everyone was having babies apart from me! and my younger sister is on her second (was really heart wrenching when i found out)Went to the doctors and dh had SA which was absolutly devastating news 1% Mortality  I completely shut down!anyway the doctor has said that ivf was our answer but as we have already got a child the NHS were not going to fund us ,Even more devastated.Anyway we had our first consultation at lwc last wednesday and it all went pretty well,Just waiting for dh sa results and bt results for egg sharing x


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## imthebeckster (Sep 28, 2011)

HI ya,

thanks for your reply Aquapinkdog ,I have been searching threads for stories to relate too ,and I am finding it had to post as I feel guilty to post as i am blessed with a dd already,we were not offeres clomid (Dont know much about it but will do some researching tonight)We were told that icis is our best bet.we Signed up for egg sharing and are waiting to have test done and also waiting for the Sa results (monday)its all a big waiting game!i am panicking big time about the results of Sa what if they cant do icis?
Becky x


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## natashah (Jan 6, 2011)

hi< i'm a newbie to this site - we have a beautiful dd (3.5 years) who was conceived after 8 months and would love to have another baby ...... I had 2 pregnancies last year, both unfortunately miscarried and after many many tests, we also found out that dh had low mortility (2%) which was quite a low point - I'm 40 this year so the combination of dh and me meant we had to go for ivf (icsi) treatment - i've just finished my first cycle which I found out today hasn't worked ..... disappointed and quite low tonight. 

Another go in january probably!

I agree, I know I am blessed with a DD but it doesn't make the pain of secondary infertility any easier

keep spirits up, there's always hope


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## imthebeckster (Sep 28, 2011)

morning girls,

Sorry to hear your tx didnt work this time  but hopeful 2012 is a good year for all of us.  

Chin up girls we can do this xxx PMA


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## aquapinkdog (Dec 23, 2010)

Hi Beckster,
Where are you doing the ICSI if you don't mind me asking? Don't worry about the sperm test too much now you've made the decision to go ahead with ICSI. The consultant told us that the swimming part (motility) is irrelevant, as long as there is sperm it doesn't matter if they can swim or not as they are injecting it directly into the egg anyway. I wish you the best of luck.

Natashah, I'm sorry to hear of your losses and that you got a BFN this week. It must be really hard for you.

Like you both said, let's find some PMA...it has to be our time soon    .

Keep us up to date on your progress.

Fx


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## imthebeckster (Sep 28, 2011)

Hi ya Aquapinkdog, Got the results today,the consultant said we are all ok for icis. this is what she said on the phone:
Overall all ok
Concentration all ok
Volume 1.9ml ok
Motality 30% (but would like it to be 40%)Dh was unwell whenhe did this SA
23% AND 40% antibobies
3% normal forms
just waiting for them to send me the report and have to book in for all my screening test
quite happy witht the results as they were better than last year
Also said we should still ttc naturally 
xxx
ps the londons women clinic harley street x


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## aquapinkdog (Dec 23, 2010)

That's great news. What a transformation in motility. Did u have him doing anything differently since the last test? 
Hopefully you will get a natural bfp while waiting to start icsi.
I will keep everything crossed for you.
Fx


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## imthebeckster (Sep 28, 2011)

Gosh would't that be lovely to get a natural bfp,
well since last year dh as joined the gym we have been eating healthy and we did have alot of stress last year,So im only hoping it can get better,we are taking preconception vit (wellman/woman)and our consultant advised Dh to take Selecrim vits becuase he has 23%/40% antibodies .I booked in for my screening tests for friday and hoping the ball will start rolling abit more  .Whats going on with you? x


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