# Initial home visit



## Adam_Claire (Aug 26, 2010)

Hi All,

Adoption thread newbies here (but not board newbies, have recently had one ivf attempt - failed, unfortunately - so have been active on other threads on here).

So, we have our first home visit in a few weeks time (we are ready to go now but were told we had to wait 6 months folloiwng the ivf treatment for a grieving time  ).

Whilst we are 100% behind adoption, one thing that worries us slightly is that we have quite a history of tried and failed surrogacy attempts, plus this ivf attempt. We are just a little concerned that this will play against us when the sw asks the question, "why do you want to adopt" - I dont want it to sound like a last resort, although I guess in a way it is.....any advice?

We are going through Bristol incidentally....

Hope you are all well.


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## panorama (Feb 7, 2005)

Hi Adam_Claire

I wouldn't worry too much about your history, as you can see we also had a long ivf history and they are used to people moving onto adoption after ivf, they just need to see that you are committed to the process really.

Good luck, our LA deals with Bristol quite a lot and they apparently are crying out for adoptive couples! 

p xx


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

Hi me and my dh were approved through Bristol LA on 6 Jan 2011 we too thought they were crying out for adoptive parents seems I am wrong as it is now 7 weeks and not seen a sniff of a childs cpr, in fact my SW said there are no children at present awaiting adoption, we originally went with an LA as we thought that we might get a quick link, now in hind sight we might have been better with a VA at least by now we could have looked in BMP or CWW, and we now have to wait at least 3 months before we can look, another couple on our Prep course who were approved last week have been told they have to wait 6 months !!!!!.  I was hoping we might have a quick link now it seems we may be waiting ages, patience ( I have none)  Good luck with Bristol our journey has been ok, however I know that you might have to wait ages for a place on a prep course


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## Adam_Claire (Aug 26, 2010)

Lisa and P, 
Thanks for your replies...congrats on getting approved Lisa...however we were dissapointed to read of the various wait times you were talking about. We were under the impression that Bristol had quite a few children ready to adopt....maybe this is not really the case. You do tend to get used to waiting in this game but still its very frustrating. 
In your post you mentioned VA and BMP, CWW  - What are they??

THe reason we went with Bristol is because we have a 4 year old son (through surrogacy), and bristol were the only ones that would take us, all the others we looked into said we had to wait until ds was 5 (even though everyone knows it takes several months to get approved matched etc!)

Have you, or can you apply with other agencies at the same time as Bristol?

So our first step is the home visit. Can you give us any tips on what to expect on this? Is there any prep we can do?
THe home visit is in April, and the SW was saying its cutting it fine to the next time the selectors (or whatever it is they are called) meet to decide if we can go through to the prep course and HA, so we have a horrible feeling we may miss it this time round...hence more waiting.

Sorry for all the questions and waffling on, we are very low on the adoption learning curve at the moment so have a lot to get to grips with.
Many thanks.


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## Mrs Dibbles (Aug 19, 2007)

I think Bristol is much the same as any other adoption authority to be honest and the adoption process is a long but exciting journey. We were approved in december and our initial enquiry was only the previous december which went really quickly. As to matching, there are children out there but you have to wait for the one thats appropriate for you, for some its weeks and for others its much longer. I have tried to use all the waiting time positvely and learned alot about myself in the process. Incidently we were told that the average waiting time post approval was around 6 months. Good luck with your journey and don't worry it goes much quicker than you think.

All the best Mrs D


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

As we live just outside of Bristol and in a neighbouring LA we were sort of fast tracked, as at our time of applying they particularly wanted people outside of Bristol, so I dont know whether you are in Bristol or outside (perhaps you can pm me).

We enquiried in Oct 2009 and went on info session Jan 09, we had to wait as we missed the one in Nov 09 due to holiday and there was not one in December due to xmas - after the info session you have to wait for a prep course prior to last year, Bristol LA were only running two a year may and sept, however due to extra funding they did another one in jan, so last year they done one in jan 10, may 10 and sep 10, we had to wait from initial home visit feb 10 to end of april 10 to hear if we got a place, it went on merit, and as we lived outside of bristol, we were chosen, there were 10 couples on our course, only 1 lived within  the boundaries of Bristol (they had to wait nearly a year for a place),  others came from swindon, cheltenham, weston, yate, and surrounding areas.  we were relatively quick.  we did the prep course in may (4 evenings and 2 sats) worked well as we both work during day.  We then started home study on 30 june had our last one beginning of dec and then went to panel for approval on 6 jan 2011, we are now waiting for a match  - been 7 weeks.  If you want to know anything more let me know.

or if it is private pm me.

good luck

Lisa


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

As we live just outside of Bristol and in a neighbouring LA we were sort of fast tracked, as at our time of applying they particularly wanted people outside of Bristol, so I dont know whether you are in Bristol or outside (perhaps you can pm me).

We enquiried in Oct 2009 and went on info session Jan 09, we had to wait as we missed the one in Nov 09 due to holiday and there was not one in December due to xmas - after the info session you have to wait for a prep course prior to last year, Bristol LA were only running two a year may and sept, however due to extra funding they did another one in jan, so last year they done one in jan 10, may 10 and sep 10, we had to wait from initial home visit feb 10 to end of april 10 to hear if we got a place, it went on merit, and as we lived outside of bristol, we were chosen, there were 10 couples on our course, only 1 lived within  the boundaries of Bristol (they had to wait nearly a year for a place),  others came from swindon, cheltenham, weston, yate, and surrounding areas.  we were relatively quick.  we did the prep course in may (4 evenings and 2 sats) worked well as we both work during day.  We then started home study on 30 june had our last one beginning of dec and then went to panel for approval on 6 jan 2011, we are now waiting for a match  - been 7 weeks.  If you want to know anything more let me know.

or if it is private pm me.

good luck

Lisa


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## Pink Lady 66 (Sep 3, 2008)

As we live just outside of Bristol and in a neighbouring LA we were sort of fast tracked, as at our time of applying they particularly wanted people outside of Bristol, so I dont know whether you are in Bristol or outside (perhaps you can pm me).

We enquiried in Oct 2009 and went on info session Jan 09, we had to wait as we missed the one in Nov 09 due to holiday and there was not one in December due to xmas - after the info session you have to wait for a prep course prior to last year, Bristol LA were only running two a year may and sept, however due to extra funding they did another one in jan, so last year they done one in jan 10, may 10 and sep 10, we had to wait from initial home visit feb 10 to end of april 10 to hear if we got a place, it went on merit, and as we lived outside of bristol, we were chosen, there were 10 couples on our course, only 1 lived within  the boundaries of Bristol (they had to wait nearly a year for a place),  others came from swindon, cheltenham, weston, yate, and surrounding areas.  we were relatively quick.  we did the prep course in may (4 evenings and 2 sats) worked well as we both work during day.  We then started home study on 30 june had our last one beginning of dec and then went to panel for approval on 6 jan 2011, we are now waiting for a match  - been 7 weeks.  If you want to know anything more let me know.

or if it is private pm me.

good luck

Lisa


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