# BFN today - so pleased to see Ultra's BFP!



## clare2 (Aug 1, 2006)

I'm so down after getting a BFN, especially as my ET was at top clinic ARGC and done by Mr T himself! The embryologist told me my eggs were of "exceptional quality" for my age so I'm really gutted. 

Don't know what to do now - I turned 40 this month and really feel my time has run out, but feel heartened by Ultra's BFP at 46. 

Dunno if I should try DE, even though my eggs seem to be good quality for my age - does anyone know how much DE increase your chances?

And also which clinics do DE - does the Lister do this? I know ARGC doesn't.

Any advice to cheer me up would be really appreciated! I told my husband today that I hate my life and can't take this anymore. Very dramatic and it really upset it, so I need to cheer up asap!

thanks

Elena  xx


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## Ellie.st (Mar 11, 2005)

Dear Elena
I am so sorry about your BFN.  I had the same experience as you with my first two cycles - good eggs, good embryos but no success.  On our third  IVF attempt (when I was 42) the embryologist told us it was down to good embryos and a good lining - and good luck in getting the embryos to implant in the lining at the optimum time.  We were really lucky on our third attempt and got a BFP with my own eggs.  If you are producing good eggs and good embryos, you still have a chance - I suppose it just depends on how long you want to keep on trying.  From my elderly perspective, you are certainly not over the hill yet.     However, before you go through another cycle (your own eggs or DE), it might be worth having tests to see if there are any problems which haven't been spotted yet and which could be treated  - there is a good list on the Investigations and Immunology board on this site which your GP and/or clinic should be able to arrange for you.  I did this after my second cycle (everything came back OK).

If you go down the DE route, it will certainly increase your chances - to the same as the age of your donor (ie if your donor is 25, you have the same success rate as a 25 year old).  

Good luck whatever you decide. A BFN is a really hard thing to go through, so take care of yourself and give yourself time to grieve before you decide what to do next. 

Ellie


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## Cotswold Girl (Nov 16, 2006)

Elena,

I'm so sorry that you've had a BFN. It's a real blow and you're allowed to feel down for a bit hun.    Having good eggs and embies is a positive thing but does make it harder to decide when to move on. Give yourself a while to get over your latest disappointment and then decide what to do.

Like you I've produced good embies on both my cycles and have been weighing up moving to DE. We've got some frozen embies to use so have decided to use these for our 3rd and final attempt with my aged eggs. After that (if they fail to make it through the 2ww or thaw) it's DE for us. I've got another year on you and a history of endo and fibroids so feel time's of the essence. You're still a youngster by comparison!

Have a good cry, a large glass of wine and then start doing some research about DE. You need to take a break before doing another cycle of IVF and need some time to decide where you go next. DE would give you far better odds and sometimes you just need a bigger incentive to keep you going. 

I've been reading some very good things on the overseas boards about success rates with DE and it's cheaper and less of a wait than in the UK. 

Take care, love and luck, CG xxxxx


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## clare2 (Aug 1, 2006)

Thanks a lot for your replies ladies, really appreciate it. 

I'll investigate DE - didn't realise it gives you the same chance at IVF as age of your donor - I feel really positive about that!

We might try another cycle with my eggs and then if that doesn't work, go down the DE route. 

Exx


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## JUMP (Mar 16, 2007)

Hi Elena67,

Just thought I would say that I,m sorry to hear about your BFN hun..

I dont really know much DE but take some time out, be good to yourselve and decide what to do next.

I hope things work out for you... Keep positive   

Jump xxx


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