# First Failed IVF uncertain about the future



## Adlymiracle (Jan 5, 2015)

Hi,

So this my first post, have been TTC for nearly 3 years. Last March was diagnosed with mild endometriosis & then later found out I have low ovarian reserve. I am quite dissolutioned by the nhs ivf system & feel there is no duty of care after a failure. As we only have one go in our area we are now looking to overseas clinics or alternative therapies for a solution. 

I got my bfn on Sunday & feel quite numb & very uncertain, just waiting for AF now. Any advice on any of this would be great


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## hilly35 (Feb 14, 2012)

Adly - I am so so sorry to hear your news. I really think a first BFN is beyond crushing as your heart tells you this is the solution. However the odds say it takes 3 IVF attempts for a positive.

There are loads of boards on here for overseas clinics where I know the ladies will help you with questions. If you do decide to stay in the UK I would encourage you to try and go to as many open evenings as you can to get a feel for the clinic you want to go with. 

You will see from my signature that it took us numerous attempts to get the right solution and whilst I am very sure it wont be as complicated for you I just wanted to let you know there is hope at the end of that very long tunnel.

best of luck. You are not alone in how you are feeling xxxxxxxxxx


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## bombsh3ll (Apr 19, 2012)

Hi Adlymiracle,

Sorry for your recent BFN  

I too felt very let down by the NHS, not only did we have to self-fund at our local hospital but the clinical care was very poor.

I have done 2 cycles abroad, OE & DE, & found the care in Spain much better than we had received in the UK.  If you are open to looking abroad it is definitely worth considering as an option. It's a big world & the best care is not always found on your doorstep.

Cost is often cited as a reason for going abroad - whilst we found that once travel etc was factored in there was not much of a saving there are other advantages too such as multiple embryo transfer, safer & more modern treatment approach in other European countries - use of short/agonist protocol & a move towards more conservative stimulation doses, & if donation is or becomes a consideration for you, this is also more accessible and anonymous abroad.

Be kind to yourself, wishing you a peaceful recovery & best of luck with your next steps.

B xxx


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## Adlymiracle (Jan 5, 2015)

Thanks so much for your replies, was unsure about joining but have felt so isolated & confused. Will look into Spain & I know we are really at the start compared to many.

I was really taken back when I called in to report my results and they said I didn't even have to go in for follow up. I want too & now have to wait a month. 

Anyway thanks again, will have a look at some of the discussions


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Sorry for your result  

Take a bit of time and have a few treats, you have been through a big thing and you need to be kind to yourself.

Spain, Greece, and the Czech Republic are all popular places abroad. The regional section will give you a good idea of the different clinics and the locations. There is also good information about where to stay, tests etc. 

Good luck xxx


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## Pickle123 (Aug 5, 2014)

Hi Adly

Sorry about your bfn. I don't know much about overseas clinics but hear that Serum is meant to be good and you can do a telephone consultation with Penny there who I have heard lots of good things about from others with low ovarian reserve. 

I wanted to say hello because I also had one egg retrieved in my first and only NHS cycle in Nov and it utterly crushed me at the time. I just wanted you to know you're not alone and that a couple of months on, I feel much more positive about trying again. I knew my reserve wasn't brilliant but I responded much more poorly to stims than anyone expected based on my FSH and AMH. I'm just wondering if you're in a similar situation because my hope is that a different protocol might get me a better response. 

I've had consultations with The Lister and ARGC in the last couple of weeks and am planning to try again in the next few months. I'm going to have some immunes testing which will take a bit of time.

Good luck with your next steps


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## Adlymiracle (Jan 5, 2015)

Hi Pickle123,

Sorry to hear your results, I've been lost the last few days, scouring the Internet for hope & or advice.

I am going to wait 6 months, partly financial but also taking leave from work. I know a lady I work with did the short protocol and said she responded better.

My plan is to try & switch off for the moment, going down a natural path, reflexology, vitamins & attempting to relax....apparently that's the winning ingredient lol.

I am also looking at the immune testing, I am lost, I have read so much & posted but finding it hard to navigate. It is so expensive to start but then do I just wait till I go overseas? I think this is my issue to be honest. I have never even had a pregnancy scare or joy & I'm 33. 

Anyway hope this made some sense, head still a bit all over the place. Thanks for your response


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