# New to thread - Any advice?



## Tazza (Apr 23, 2006)

Hi All,

I'm Tazza - ive been a member of FF for a little while and normally post on PCOS and Endo.  Today i had my 2nd consultation with my consultant who gave me the results from my lap/dye.  Unfortunetly as well as have PCOS & Endo there are problems with both my tubes.  As my DH has poor motility/abnormal sperm we are going down the ICSI route.

My consultant spoke to us today about egg share, how it is a way of part-funding ICSI.  He also explained how the law had now changed so that it is now not anonomous and that it we chose to go down that route we have to think that there could be a possibility of 20 years down the line someone may look for me.  

My head is buzzing, Dh thinks it's a good idea - he thinks the consultant was just following the law in informing us but in reality it is very unlikely someone will want to find their egg donor.  We said we would think about it over the weekend and give him a call on Tuesday to let he know our decision.  

I'm happy to give the gift of an egg (s) but want to know a little bit more.  My consultant will carry out all of the tests for me on the NHS (HIV, Cystic Fib, Hepatitus etc) but can anyone else give me some advice on what actually happens.  I've read some of your post where a recipient accepts you or not - do they actually meet you or are they just given your profile?  Can you not start treatment until you find a recipient?  I'm so overwhelmed, i'm just - well you know!  It was not a shock to be told that we would need ICSI but when it's reality and being asked other things (like egg share) i've found it all hard to take in.

So if anyone can give me any advice and view, i'd be really grateful.

Thanks

Tazza x


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## kewlgirlno1 (May 13, 2005)

HI Tazza,,


im the same as u thinking about egg sharing,, 

u dont meet the person u r donating the eggs to,, in time u can find out if the recipient concieved using ur eggs,,, 


and yeah, there is a possibilty that the child might come looking for u thats why u need to tell them any addresses u will be moving to,, 

i am thinking about it as i have only 1 working tube and 15% chance of conceiving again,,, 
they pay for all the tests needed and fertility drugs, and we pay £500 for IVF,, 
it is worth conseidering as IVF normally £3,500 which is a lot of money,,

i have a meeting with the hospital on the 7th June , if u like i can let u know how it goes and any other question that r needing answered,, 


loads of luck,, in what u decide,,

pam

x


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## Tazza (Apr 23, 2006)

Hi Pam,

That would be great - thank you very much.  

I didn't get much sleep last night thinking about it, it's really around the issue of if i don't get pregnant and the recipient does - i know that sounds really selfish but i really need to think about how that would affect me.  But my darling Husband gave me some good advice this morning, he said that i should look at it the same way i do about giving blood, i give blood and i don't think twice about it, also i can decide that i don't want to know if the recipient was successful because i don't when i give blood! So i think we are definietly going to go ahead with it.  

Good luck with your appointment on the 7th June.

If anyone else has any advice i would be grateful

Thanks

Tazza x


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## marble (May 8, 2005)

Hi Tazza
Sorry to hear you have something added to your diagnosis 
I have egg shared twice the fact that a child born from your donation is a possibility and something you should talk about in depth dont worry you will be offered councelling to air your thoughts. My personal view on it is that any child born through my donation would yes have some of my dna but thats it once the eggs are retrieved from me and placed in the petri dish without sperm without a uterus without a blood supply then the egg would have perished. Therefore I have no part in the fact they are an 18yr old I would of course answer any questions regarding my background and why I chose to donate etc to the child but I would explain that without there mother who carried and loved them for the last 18yrs they would not be here.  

the process is as follows you will get all the screening tests done and your characturistics will be taken like hair colour eye colour height build age etc they will then match you to a recipiant that is on there waiting list you will not ever meet the recipiant it is only minimal profile they will recieve . You dont need to find the recipiant they do it through there waiting list system.

You can specify that you dont want to find out the outcome of your donation.

once you are matched you they syncrinise your cycle with the recipiant and you start down regs for around 14 - 18 days and then take a follicular stimulating hormone to produce eggs you then half any eggs retrieved they like a minimum of 8 

If you want to know anything else just shout

good luck


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## Tazza (Apr 23, 2006)

Thanks Marble for the great advice.  I have totally got my head sorted now and am 100% committed to egg sharing.  I read some of the posts on the donor egg/sperm thread and reading some of their stories made my mind up.  Your right, the egg is nothing without the sperm, uterus and blood supply and i'm also giving someone else the chance to fulfil their dream as well as my own.

Just can't wait to get started now.  Thanks again Marble & Pam you have been a great help

Tazza x


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## marble (May 8, 2005)

Hi Tazza

I am glad you have thought it through and have decided egg share is for you I wish you lots of luck with your journey and I will be looking out for your updates


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