# Matching panel and intros April / May



## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Hi Ladies and Gents, 

We have been linked to two pinks aged 3 years and 12 months. We are hoping to go to matching panel early April and start intros the end of April ending with our Princesses being home      the first week in May. 

I think it's great to share tips advice and experiences of all the meetings to come we've got FC, medical adviser and life appreciation early March. Would love to chat to others going through it at the same time. 

DIYDiva x


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## Petite One (Jun 1, 2011)

Congratulations DIY Diva.   You must both be so thrilled. Time will fly past now.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Thank you PO hope your journey is going really well x


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## Sq9 (Jan 15, 2013)

Fabulous news     Many congratulations     Enjoy every second xx


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## Dreams do come true (Jan 4, 2012)

Perfect! Congratulations! I am so pleased you got siblings!!!!


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## Hunibunni (Jan 18, 2009)

That's amazing news  DIY Diva  - big congrats!     

Looking forward to hearing all about your meetings, intros etc 

Xx


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

Congrats Diva!   

We've been linked to a little blue and little pink, aged 2 and 1. MP should be mid-March with intros pencilled in for early April  

Nice to have a thread going to share experiences! 

We're so excited/nervous and impatient, all rolled into one. 

Have you met the foster carers/medical advisor yet?


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Thank you so much everyone. We're just coming out of shock and starting to get excited now  . Dandlebean great to know someone else is doing it all at a similar time. Have you met FC etc already?


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

We just met FC and medical advisor this week   It was fantastic - really brought the kids to life and things are definitely starting to feel more real. Time seems to have ground to a halt now though and it feels like April is soooooo far away! 

Are you buying stuff yet, or are you going to wait until after MP? It's difficult to know how much to do. Our SW says that the MP is more of a formality and that she's never had a 'No' with any of her adopters. Still, I'm a little wary of getting too excited and buying all the big stuff (like a double buggy), just in case!


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Oh how exciting!! No we don't meet MA and FC till start of March so two and a half weeks off. 

So far I have a buggy I bought in October just after approval (on ebay a bargain I couldn't resist). I have a rocking chair I bought last week also an Ebay purchase. Monday I bought some bits and pieces to make the girls little Easter baskets of little gifts. Easter will be between MP and intros for us so thought it would be nice for them to have something off us Easter day - as long as FC is happy. Today I bought them a teddy each off the Jellycat website which should be delivered next week. I'm going to sleep with them so my sent / smell is familiar to the girls. Have been eyeing up recordable photo albums too but not purchased yet. 

We have to take photo albums, a DVD of us and the house, teddies and large laminated photos to MP. We'll have to have room etc ready by then because they'll want a photo of the bedroom in the photoalbums. 

Not yet bought furniture but I think we will soon. Looking at curtains etc this week however SW's have said the girls will come with a lot of stuff so we should wait to meet fc before buying too much. 

However DH and I have discussed purchases like stair gates and a thermometer which are things every parent needs and other people won't give us. 

All getting exciting. Do they want photalbums etc from you for MP>


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

Ooh, I hadn't thought of little things like thermometers! Thanks for the tip  

We've started getting baby gates, and had painted both bedrooms neutrally after approval. I'm so excited that we can now start adding finishing touches to tailor it to our LOs   I've been looking at buggies since we were linked and have finally settled on the one I want, but it's very expensive, so I'm still hesitating slightly. 

We also have to do the laminated photos, a DVD and the talking books (one for each child) by MP.  

We've started looking at the cuddly toys to have in the photos too, but I just can't decide what to get. The foster carer said they'll like anything, but I'm still dithering. I know it doesn't sound like a big decision, but if they don't like the toy, they won't want to hold it or play with it and then they won't get used to our smell; so it feels like quite a major thing to me!

I'm finding it hard to contain my excitement now. Although I found the waiting for the right match rather painstaking, the thought of starting life with these LOs has made it all SO worth it


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## sass30 (Apr 16, 2011)

DIY DIVA just wanted to say what fantastic news. Couldnt be happier. Well worth the wait. X


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Thanks Sasso can't wait till you find your prince or princess too x


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

Dandlebean, they'll probably want to hold the toy because it's from you and also they'll have it put with them to bed too to help.
I suggest you go for toys that are supersoft to touch, have a nice long label and get at least two of each one! You'll need it!

In terms of buying stuff, lots of people give away old kid stuff all the time so worth asking friends/community group/church/ local sure start centre.
You're all going for LOs aged 1-3yrs so you need to get 9mth-4yr car seats (though DIYdiva you might not want to get one too expensive for pink no 1).
There are so many types out there but I recommend the Maxi Cosi Axis if you have a bad back or want to prevent one. It swivels to face the door and is really sturdy. Heavy but easy to fit if you need to move it. £170
ASDA do a Nania brand which is birth-aged 8yrs. This is pretty much just polystyrene and very light weight so great if you have to move the carseat lot -ideal for pink aged 3 who would soon outgrow the Axis. Personally I preferred to use it once LO reached 2yrs or older. £30
We have both as go out with my friend a lot and her LO and it's convenient to have a 2nd seat. It's a squeeze but using these two we can also fit a booster in the middle (we have a Scenic Megane).

I'd always recommend getting a cotbed rather than a cot as it'll last them until they're about 6. We got ours off Gumtree for about £20 and just had to get a mattress which was about £40 from Mothercare.
You can find out what they're into in terms of duvet cover and decorations. You can get wall stickers which are easy to remove if their Peppa Pig phase suddenly ends. Curtains etc I'd keep plain or a general theme as rather more expensive to replace!
At the ages you've all got books will frequently get ripped or destroyed/ Friends and charity shops are fantastic. 

Toys I'd recommend:
Books -rhyming ones, and especially tactile ones but not flaps as they just get ripped
A ball pit and 2 bags of balls
Duplo or something to that effect
Shape sorter
Puzzles
cars
doll and cot/ pushchair
stacker cups
Ball run
farm animals
musical toys i.e. keyboard/ drum
Get a mix of noisy and quiet ones -as much as they love the noisy ones there will definitely be times you will certainly appreciate the quiet ones more at times!
DVDs are great but watching the same one all the time will do your head in -get a recordable box if you don't have sky or virgin and start recording episodes -I recommend Peppa Pig, Thomas the Tank, Something Special, Dinosaur Train (adopted dinosaur), Mike the Knight, Raa Raa, In the Midnight Garden, Zingzillas
IT IS OKAY TO LET THEM WATCH TV -even if you vowed TV time would be limited etc!  

You will need, Calpol, thermometer, plasters and Teetha powder

Will think of more when my son isn't trying to fake eat me!


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Arrows that's awesome thank you.  Had been eyeing up the axis but will definitely go for it I think.  Pink 1 wil need the next step up I think. We got the jelly cat teddies because they are so soft. 

Been looking at albums definitely getting the Tommy butterfly one for pink 2. But not sure what to get pink 1. There are additional photos sw wants her to have that i agree will be a good idea for her so we'll need more than 8 photos to go in. I've looked at others and they're very plain and not as pretty and child friendly.  Thought I could decorate it a bit but not sure if pink 1 will feel hers isn't as nice. I know what you mean dandlebean these decisions feel very important.  X x


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

Wow, thanks Arrows! That's all so helpful!  

That swivel car seat sounds amazing.


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

I agree DIY, 8 photos isn't very many at all! We've also got them a Galt soft photo album, so we can add a few extra photos. We thought they could share that one and their foster carer can show it to them together. They'll each have their own butterfly albums to keep for life


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Do you have a link for the galt one? Is it recordable or normal?  Debating doing 3 a butterfly each and an additional one. I'm always happier over prepared than under x x


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

It's just a regular album - and still doesn't hold many photos! We just thought it would be good for the littlest one and could be left just lying around for the kids to pick up and throw around and stuff  Plus it gives us a chance to show just a few more photos, as 8 doesn't seem to be enough to get everything in 

Here it is on Amazon: 
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Galt-1003094-Soft-Photo-Album/dp/B0017IW2S2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1392470941&sr=8-1&keywords=galt+soft+photo


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

I made a scrapbook with pictures and activities on each page for LO to see and do. It was a really helpful way of including grandparents etc as well as they had to pic a photo to go in. We didn't use it much in the end as LO was too young but kept me occupied when waiting.
We gave a Tomy talking butterfly album too and got grandparents to record their voices to introduce themselves on the pictures. You can fit in two people per page that way.


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## Loopylou29 (Mar 4, 2013)

If you are after mattresses have a look at mattress factory. They sell all sizes and types at really low prices. There is a small delivery charge but all the mattresses come with washable covers. We got one and were a bit dubious but the mattress is great. Fully sprung cool max mattress was 34 pound including delivery. 
Also our gp told us not to bother with calpol and to get junior paracetamol instead on the basis it does the same job. We asked the pharmacist who was in agreement and we've never bought calpol the junior paracetamol does the job.
If you need a highchair then the ikea ones are great. £16 for the chair and tray plus they are really easy to clean.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Loving the tips ladies thank you.  Good to know about some bargains. It seems many places have the idea oh well if we put nursery on it we can charge double.  I like the idea of the soft album for princess two to drag about.  Perhaps I'll do one of those for princess two,  a butterfly to share and one of the longer ones for princess one. Gosh I do make a drama over every decision lol. Will show all options to DH and see what he thinks x x


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Just bumping this thread back up so others can see. 

I chose curtains yesterday and bought - teething granules, plasters, Tupperware and a few other little bits that we'll need. Hope you're getting on well. x x


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Other random purchase 100 children s hangers on Ebay for £11.99 - mothercare etc total rip off!!! x x x x


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

You also accumulate lots of hangers when buying items or if given gifts. I only bought 2 packs of the wooden ones from ikea and rest are all from high street shops. I agree MC etc rip off for this stuff.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

I probably won't need 100 but seemed daft not to when they were so much cheaper. Just actually need a wardrobe to put them in now


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

I got curtains and lampshades the other day too   They were the more personalised things I was thinking about leaving until after panel, but I'm too impatient and excited to wait any longer now. Plus, as you pointed out, we'll need to take photos before panel anyway, so have to get the rooms finished anyway. 

Great deal on the hangers!


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Have you got furniture yet?  I think we've decided but we haven't bought it yet.  We looked at a number of places at the weekend.  X x


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

Haha I use lots of mine 
I got new fitted wardrobes done in lil mans room pre link as wanted the double space since we were thinking siblings. However it's FULL for lil man. I buy bits n bobs in sales and he has a very good shoe collection lol


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

We are a very boy heavy wider family so I think our princesses will have wardrobes bursting at the seams too x x


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

We got a toddler bed second-hand from a friend, which we bought ages ago, as it was too good a deal to pass up on and so little money that it wouldn't really matter if we ended up not using it. 

More recently (just this weekend), I have to confess we gave in and got the cot too! 

We were holding off on the more expensive things, like buggies and car seats, but I think now we've got the cot and curtains and stuff, we may as well throw caution to the wind and get the rest. 

The only trouble is, once you've bought the stuff, you have to stop looking, and then it feels like there's nothing fun to do (I was really enjoying looking at cots)! xx


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

so true when I no longer have to trawl the internet and shops I'll feel lost lol!!! I am painting the Princesses bedroom Thursday - I'm really lucky my Mum will help me so I will buy the paint tomorrow. Hoping my teddies might arrive tomorrow it says they've been dispatched on Monday so surely Royal Mail can't keep hold of them much longer  . 

Are your two sharing or separate? Ours are sharing because they share in FC at the moment. I'm glad they're sharing because it's something familiar for them. x x x


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

We're putting ours in separate rooms, as they're quite small rooms. At the moment, the youngest is in with her FC, so we may have to re-think things when we bring them home. I'm tempted to re-paint the rooms, just for something more to do!   We painted both rooms neutrally before we'd been linked, but now I'm thinking they're a bit bland  

Did you get nice teddies? One of ours has arrived, just waiting for the second   We went for a Tigger and Piglet in the end. I wouldn't put anything past Royal Mail! 

Are your LOs from relatively near you? Ours is a long distance placement, which I'm just a little apprehensive about, as we can't introduce them gradually to the house and dog! xx


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## Arrows (Nov 9, 2008)

dandlebean -ours was in with FC before coming home at 10.5mths and we argued that to bring him back sleeping in our room, then have to transition him again into his own would be more traumatic for him. The SWs frowned a bit and went on about sleeping on a mattress in his room etc and I tried for all of 15mins when he just kept screaming wanting me to pick him up and refusing to sleep. We got a good video monitor and that was ideal and gave us and them the security we needed -trust me, your eyes will be glued to the screen for about 6mths watching them sleep, although if you're anything like us you'll turn the sound off a lot, lot quicker!


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Two rooms - twice the work. I'd think carefully about having one in with you and only do it if you feel it's right not because others say so. Personally I wouldn't (not saying that's correct just me) because children are really noisy sleepers so you may struggle to sleep. Also then you'll have to decide when to move them into their own room which is another upheaval /  change to work through. That said it might make life easier to start with I don't know just stick to what you feel is best not what people think is.  

Our placement is pretty much as far away as you can get from us and stay in the country (5 / 6 hours drive in clear traffic)! All SW's involved keep saying they've never done a match over such a distance. 

We have a dog he'll have to go to my parents while we're away for intros which I'm heartbroken about   . But I know we've got to do it - I never leave the dog we got him after our first ICSI failed and he's my emotional rock. Whenever I've been sad he puts his paws on my shoulders and gives me a dog hug and licks the tears off my cheeks. SW's want him to stay away for the first few days when the girls are home too. What have they said to you about the dog? 

It's the right thing to do but I'm worried how he'll cope away from me and I'll miss him desperately.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Replied at the same time Arrows


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

Phew, thanks Arrows and DIY! I felt the same about having her in our room, but I would happily have done it if there was benefit to her. As you say though, the transition again would be confusing for her and I also don't want the other one to feel at all jealous or left out, if we're all in one room and he's in another. Their rooms will be right next to each other, with ours just opposite, so we'll all be nice and close. 

BABY MONITORS! I knew I was forgetting something really, really important! Thank you Arrows! 

DIY, ours is a similar distance (a teeny bit less thankfully). Your dog sounds adorable! I never leave mine either, so it's going to be really, really hard. I'm also a little worried about how he'll cope with less attention once we have the kids. I'm pretty sure he'll take it all in his stride, but he does currently get a LOT of attention. I'm trying to get him used to being behind baby gates, which he isn't enjoying much right now! 

The only people that have offered to look after him during intros are my grandparents, who live 5 hours away from us, and equally far from where intros will be, which will make collecting him again a bit tricky (DH will have to go there and back in a day). I'm also a little wary about leaving him with these grandparents, as they're quite old-fashioned and he definitely won't be getting all the cuddles and love he gets here. On the flip-side, he'll get plenty of walks, as they live in the country, so hopefully he'll be fine. I just don't want the added stress of worrying about him whilst going through intros   The only alternative I can think of at the moment is kennels, which I really, really don't want. 

Our SWs have also said that it would be a good idea to leave him for another week or so after we get home with the kids - which does make a lot of sense. That week will give us chance to talk to the kids lots about him, though their FCs seem fantastic and I'm sure they'll be doing the same pre-intros  

Has anyone told you where you'll be staying for intros yet?


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Not actually said it's here but we've been told they'll book a cottage near by for us.  X x


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## Petite One (Jun 1, 2011)

Ah DIY Diva, he'll love those country walks I'm sure.  Probably like us city folk, it's great to go on some country walks and experience that fresh air.   Well he'll have some new family to look after when he's back with you. I love how they are so protective.


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

Well painted their room pink today with help from my wonderful mother.  What have others been told about telling others.  We've been told we can't tell anyone other than parents and siblings till after mp. Which is fine with us - we're not big sharers. However our solution to this is to hide away - if people don't see us they can't ask and we don't have to lie. Now we have a pink room and things are getting ordered it's going to be harder to keep under wraps. Also have already had a couple of texts from people asking if I'm okay because they haven't heard from us. 

Don't think there's a solution really just want to vent c xcxc


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## dandlebean (Feb 24, 2013)

Yay, is it starting to feel more real now you've got the room painted? I'm going on Monday to get some more bits and pieces...I just can't wait any longer!  

We were never told whether we could tell anyone or not - so I've told everyone! But I have made sure that they're all aware that it's not a definite until after MP - and I haven't mentioned names or details, only that we've been linked, along with their approximate ages (as its the first question everyone asks after the gender). 

I don't see that there's anything wrong with telling friends that you have a match...but I guess if you've specifically been told not to, it's better to obey! Maybe just give your friends some cryptic clues so they know not to worry and have a little heads up that something very momentous may be happening soon?


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

Diva - we kept it all hush hush a
But could you not say something along lines of "well we've inquired about a sibling group but it's all in the hands of SWs and I'm being really superstitious so I'll let you know as soon as any things final. I fear even saying ages/sex may jinx things so ...." To friends.

Although I did have to say to a very close friend "nothing further yet I'll tell you as soon as any news" the week before match panel as I see him on train and worked right up until MP. I then had to send out texts that day to say we were meeting lil man in 2days time. Luckily my friends are very forgiving and do understand my jinxy feelings. Mad I know but better get lots of couple/friends things in now in case you have two bubbly pink rascals taking up your every waking minute (believe me you sometimes just want to watch them sleep) x x


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

I remember Gertie how much of a whirl wind your situation was and not being able to tell. That's a good idea I will use those kind of words x x


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## GERTIE179 (Apr 20, 2005)

Might also be worth having a few "plans" in the diary after MP then you can share the news more with those you wish to give details to.


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## EverHopefulmum (Sep 23, 2009)

We didn't tell anyone until after MP (SW explicitly told us not to)......our parents nearly fainted when we told them that we were approved for LO and were meeting him less than 2 weeks later.....they said afterwards they were glad they didn't know in the run up as they would have been too stressed. They were literally sick with worry for AP!!!!

It was hard not to tell, but made the big reveal even better


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## Mummy DIY Diva (Feb 18, 2012)

We're quite happy not telling TBH we're just not very good liars that's our only problem    . Bet you can't wait for intros to start Everhopeful you'll have to share any tips x x


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