# starting fertility treatment with NHS



## nshek (May 20, 2011)

We are a gay couple who have been together for 5 years and we would love to have a child of our own.  After waiting 9 months to get a initial appointment with the fertility specialist (NHS), we just found out that it could take 2 years to have the first IUI procedure.    We knew there was a waiting list, but didn't realise it would be that long!  We feel disheartened and frustrated really.

I am worried being 32 years old, that we are waiting a further 2 years will lower my chances of conceiving.  We could go private but saving could take us 2 years!  Perhaps a loan.

We are currently looking at alternatives but could do with some advice.  Anyone out there having the same issues?  Or been better advice?  In 2-3 months we will going to the fertility sperm bank consultant to discuss the chances of success etc.

Thanks for reading this!

Alex


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## welshginge (Jul 12, 2009)

Hey, welcome to the boards. Sorry I can't help I went private as my area wouldn't fund anything. The cheaper alternative is a known donor, although I'm sure this has crossed your minds already.

Best of luck whatever you decide to do!


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## Candy76 (Feb 19, 2011)

Hi Alex,

Yes, we know the feeling of frustration. Our journey started about 4 years ago with a GP appointment asking for a referral to the local clinic. It was our hope to have 1 or 2 children by now, but we haven't been lucky with it yet.

The waiting list at our NHS clinic is 1 year for IUI and 2 years for IVF. I don't know how those waiting lists work, but would the 2 year wait for you shorten if you had your own sperm? We ended up getting our own sperm after a very bizare conversation at the matching appointment, but it wouldn't have made any difference to the waiting time.

As welshginge said, there are obviously a number of other options. We were playing with the thought of egg-sharing, but I was nearly 35 when we arrived at this point and it was too late then.

Sorry I can't be of more help. The one thing thats sure it that the ttc route is unpredictable. - We have friends who got pregnant 1st time round twice and others who have been trying for years. From that reason I wouldn't go for a loan. Do you still get birthday / Christmas presents from family members? how about asking for money instead?

Best of luck!


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## kedmo1 (Aug 18, 2010)

Hi, I would look at ivf egg share as its affordable, you get to help someone in a similar way to how sperm donor helped you and success rates are so much higher than iui. 
Not sure where you are based but loads of clinics offering egg share. Care fertility, mfs, Lwc to name a few. Loads of information on there websites about it all, you normally get a free consultation too

Sperm from clinics is usually cheaper than importing but most clinics have a waiting list except Lwc(but its 850 shot) and the bridge clinic in london.  

Im egg sharing and paid 600 plus about 300 for screening tests which you can get gp to do if you have  a nice one.  I imported sperm cause didn't want to wait but it would have bn 600 from clinic im using if I'd waited.

Good luck 
Kerry


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## nshek (May 20, 2011)

Thanks everyone for your advice, glad we are not the only one's out there!

Hi Kerry

I heard about egg sharing, but was told the procedure can be very evasive.  I do like the idea of helping someone else, though and the fact the egg sharing is much higher in success rate than IUI

Do you know if we can buy sperm from clinics and ask the NHS to carry out the procedure?

Alex


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## kedmo1 (Aug 18, 2010)

Not sure on NHS, as I did everything privately as I'm super inpatient and my doctor is an ****. I would say that ivf is more intense than iui but I did 2 x 2ww with iui and found them more stressful than the ivf drugs.  My egg share cycle was cheaper than private d-iui,  I chose to donate all on first egg share as I only grew 7 eggs which wasnt enough to share, so I am just starting a completely free ivf cycle with all eggs for me. I'm super relaxed about it and I thought the drugs were not too bad and the egg collection was fine and painless for me.


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