# Struggling with the waiting.......



## JadeyB (Jun 17, 2008)

Hi girls,

I’m feeling a little bit down at the moment with all of this waiting.  It seems that’s all we ever do!!

I go through stages of not worrying about the whole fertility thing at all to driving myself crazy thinking that I will never have the chance to have a family.

I have only actively been trying for 6 months which I know is not very long at all, but we have been ready to start trying for well over a year, but we weren’t allowed due to treatment for cervical cancer.

I guess I feel a little lost because I haven’t started any treatment yet, I’m not yet ready to post on a board.  The consultant has said that he will start me on clomid but wants to rule out any other problems first.  I went for a HSG about 3 months ago, but unfortunately because of the surgery I had, the radiologist was unable to do the test.  They wanted me to rebook with my consultant present so that took me to day 8, 9 or 10 of my next cycle which was while I was sunning myself in Portugal (can’t complain about that – lol). 

I then tried to arrange an appointment for my next cycle and unfortunately their diaries didn't match up so nether radiologist or consultant were free at the same time.  Now we have to wait another 28 or (in fact) 40 days as I never know how long my cycle will be.

I know that some people have been waiting a lot longer than we have, but I’m just starting to learn how difficult the whole journey can be.  I just feel that we haven’t had a chance to really start trying yet and 6 months has passed.

So tonight I am going to try my first ovulation test.  How accurate are these things?  If it says I’m not ovulating does that mean I don’t have any hope?!

Sorry to have ranted on ladies, I just need to let off a bit of steam.  I’m so fed up of waiting to even get started.   I guess I just need some positive energy.

Lots of love to everyone whatever your journey.

J x

p.s. I am normally quite positive (honest) – just having a moment!


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## ❣Audrey (Aug 22, 2008)

Massive hugs hun.  It is so frustrating when you are in the initial stages of starting out your journey and waiting to start treatment - appointments can seem like a million years away.  Rest assured the time does pass quickly enough - I just make the most of it as I always see it as the last few months we will have on our own - it always passes quicker then and I find it more exciting.

Good luck on your journey xxx


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## speeder (Jul 9, 2008)

Hi there

I think the waiting is the hardest thing about the whole trying issue. I know it's hard.

The ovulation tests do work - for some people!  I found them quite trying to be honest (and I know now that I do ovulate!) My friend, who is 3 months' pregnant couldn't get them to work at all, and another friend who just had a baby found them brilliant. So I think it really depends on your own circumstances.  And there are other ways to check you ovulating too - there is loads on the internet about this.  So don't get down if the tests don't work quite right for you!

good luck, xx


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## sweets x (Jul 28, 2008)

Hi jadeyb, 
I know exactly how you feel sweetie, 
The waiting is terrible and i think its normal to be up and down. 
I tried the ovulation tests and they didn't work for me personally and tests showed that i was ovulating. Maybe i wasn't using them right either so still go ahead and try them. What works for one person doesn't always work for another.
There is always someone on here to cheer you up.
Try and keep positive (i know its hard)

speak soon
  
nicola x xx


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Hi JadeyB,

Welcome to Fertility Friends.

The waiting is one of the hardest parts  OPK's can work, but not if you have PCOS as they can give a false positive. Also OPK's will tell you when you are leading up to ovulation and not when you actually ovulate, if you use the search button on the site you will find a lot of posts about OPK's and lots of information.

There are others ways to see if you ovulate by taking your BBT(basal body temperature) and checking your CM. Your GP and cons can also do a blood test usually on CD21 of your cycle, presuming you have a 28 day cycle. If its longer or shorter then would have to be tested accordingly. As you are having irregular periods this will be hard to pin point. There are also scans to check for PCOS which can cause irregular periods and stop you from ovulating on your own, when clomidis then usually used along with metformin.

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=47.0 this board is the inbetweenies, where ladies are TTC naturally before TX.

Wishing you all the best on your journey and  you get your BFP very soon

NIkki xx


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## JadeyB (Jun 17, 2008)

Hi girls,

Thanks so much for the replies and the good advice.

Tried my second OPK today and that was negative too, going to keep trying with them this month.  Even if its just to feel like I'm doing something until I go for my second HSG.

BeeBee - You're right about focusing on things that you won't be able to do when a little one comes along.  We have been focusing on holidays and I have also been trying to improve my fitness for the start of my basketball season.  I will certainly have to give that up - oh and the dream of having a 24" waist and the figure of a supermodel - lol!!

What are the other ways of checking to see if you ovulating?  Can those only be carried out by my doctor.  I have had 3 CD21 blood tests and they came back negative.  But thats hardly surprising seeing as my cycles are so messed up.

Is it likely that I'm not ovulating at all or is just that I will be ovulating later in my cycle - sorry if thats a stupid question.  I just find it so confusing?!  

Anyone with PCOS have any advise on improving the condition of my skin.  Luckily my face isn't too bad at the moment (it has been terrible in the past) but I have huge boil like spots on my back.  Is this down to the PCOS?  They came up about 2 months after I stopped taking the pill.  I'm not sure if I'm allowed to use creams and stuff.  When I mentioned it to the doctor he just brushed it off like it was nothing (like he seems to do with my other invisible illnesses).  They are really unsightly and they are sometimes painful!

Thanks for making me feel better girlies. xx

p.s. Nikki - thanks for the link to the inbetweenies board, I will definitely check that out.  I didn't realise that board was there.


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## Sonybear (Sep 8, 2008)

Hiya sweet,

Just coming back to you regards the spots, I sufferred terribly when I came off the pill for about 12 months and eventually I went to the doctor as I thought I had PCOS, tests confirmed I didn't and hasten to say I had to find my own ways of dealing with the spots as GP then wasn't interested.

I use Freederm on my face when I get an attack which works wonders for me and after 18 months coming off the pill (probably wont be as long for you if you find something that works now!) they cleared right up and now I get an occasional few on my right jaw line and back and again I put Freederm on them and they disappear within a week.

Hope this helps.

Good luck as well on your journey, I know how frustrating the waiting can be, we are 3 years and still trying but I am hopeful we will get there eventually.

xx


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## dakota (Feb 6, 2007)

Jadey, you can check your CM (Cervical Mucus) to see when you ovulate, as well as charting your temps (BBT)

Spots ~ ask your GP for something for them. I was prescribed (cant think what its called but will get back to you) something that was ok to use while ttc as it was an aplicator.

Nikki xx


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## outspan3 (Jan 22, 2006)

Hello Jadey  Welcome to FF 

Start of the journey, end of the journey - it doesn't matter. All welcome here  Trust me, your feelings are perfectly normal  so rant away  They don't call it an emotional rollercoaster for nothing you know  and it must be frustrating when your waiting on other people being available at the same time. 

Can't help with the OPK's I'm afraid - no experience of them as I have PCOS and they are neither use nor ornament with me 

I'm going to post you a few links to help you navigate your way around the site. Don't feel restricted to these boards. Feel free to pop into any board you can contribute to and post.

*What Every New Member Needs To Know (includes a list of common abbreviations) ~ *   CLICK HERE

*Peer Support (for asking fertility and treatment related questions of your fellow FFers) ~ * CLICK HERE

*FERTILITY INFO GUIDES ~ *CLICK HERE

*Starting out & Diagnosis ~ *CLICK HERE

*Fertility through Cancer ~ *CLICK HERE

*Clomid ~ *CLICK HERE

Whilst you're here don't forget to kick back, relax and check out our fun forum where you can join in with general chit chat / jokes / hobbies area: 

*Girl & Boy talk - Community & Fun Board ~ *CLICK HERE

You can also chat live in our excellent chat room. We have a newbie night in the chat room every week (*Wednesday at 8pm*), where you can meet other new members and get technical support with navigating the site and using all the functions available here.  CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT 

You can also "meet" and chat with people in your local area through the *Location boards*. This is especially useful to find people who may be using the same clinic and or in the same PCT area.

If you need any help please feel free to ask me or any member. Someone should be able to point you in the right direction.  

Wishing you every luck in your journey.   
Suzy


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## thumbelina (Sep 2, 2008)

Hi honey
I know exactly how u r feeling, we have been waiting for six years and as others have said, the time will go really quickly.
Good luck      
Love Thumblina xxx


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## sweets x (Jul 28, 2008)

Hiya jadey,
I use neutrogena stuff on my face and it helps. If i have a bad flare up i get a topical lotion from the docs but not sure if you can use it when in tx. 

hi to everyone else

take care

nicola x xx


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## coweyes (Sep 4, 2008)

Hi there.

Sorry to here you are struggling, the waiting game is so so hard.  Iv nearly pulled my hair out waiting for app and results.  One thing i have learnt though is that you can not really hurry them up!! Iv learnt to try and take it a bit easy and go with the flow a bit if only for my own sanity.  Sorry i can not be anymore use than that. 

Take care and sending you lots and lots of good luck x x


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## JadeyB (Jun 17, 2008)

Hi Girlies,

Thanks once again for all your replies.

The spots still haven't cleared up so will have to try some of the suggestions.  I was using some over the counter cream but it has Benzoyl Peroxide in so not even sure you are supposed to use while ttc.  I was at the doctor about a week ago for something else and I completley forgot to ask him - I was too excited that he had sent me to the physio for my dodgy knees - lol!

This may be a really stupid question but how do you tell whether you are ovulating by charting temps (BBT)?  Unfortunately, I don't have cervical mucus anymore.

xx


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