# 1st time TTC - HELP



## ariellajacob (Feb 24, 2014)

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Hello to you all... My name is Ariella, my husband and I are trying to conceive for about 6 months now... without success&#8230; Nothing works-! Six months of hope and then despair.. That is six months of ovulation tests, smart-phone applications, surveying and measuring, constant surveillance - and nothing really helped! Even yoga postures and special food for fertility- I've tried it all!
All of my friends around me, and even those who are far away from me are getting pregnant&#8230; they're making it look so easy...
I'm wondering what BBT thermometer you use\used? Do you really wake up every day r-e-a-l-l-y early in the morning and without moving - measure yourself? I occasionally forget and wake up to go to the toilet  without noticing&#8230;.. 
I don't know what to do&#8230; I'm writing here for your support... for some TIPS and helpful information.. PLEASE help me... before I'll lose it..!  
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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Take folic acid, get your husband a multi-vitamin, stop drinking, and have sex every other day. You will probably ovulate around the same time every month (10-14 days before your period starts) so need to be having sex around this time. Stuff the bbt and opks, they are useful initially to pinpoint ovulation, but by the time you know have ovulated you have mostly missed your chance anyway. Have a look at the Taking Charge Of Your Fertility book if your really want to get into monitoring your cycle.  

You haven't been trying long, relax and enjoy having sex. When you have been trying a year go and see your GP. If you are over 35 go and see your GP now.

Good luck x


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## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

Hi Ariella - I know it's soo frustrating - but you've come to the right place for support and advice.... but doctors do say that even without any underlying problems - some couples can still take up to 2 years to become pregnant.

But thats great advice from Cloudy....you could, in the meantime, if you've not already done so, make an appointment with your gp to do blood tests to check you're ovulating and get your partner to have a sperm analysis test done.....

Best wishes
Sheila


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## Bela (Mar 26, 2014)

Hi all.  
I also have been trying to conceive for nearly six months now. The worst thing is, that during this time I had one chemical pregnancy and about two late periods, when I obviously thought that's the good sign   ...but turned out not to be. 
TTC last cycle and now my period is late 8 days, preg tests show negative (took last one two days ago). And I don't know what am I supposed to think anymore! I don't feel preg, don't have the obvious symptoms  
I'm in my early thirties, tcc with my first child and it's really hard to watch cycles pass without IT happening. I'm - supposedly - healthy, quite fit, my weight is normal, my partner is healthy too (although he's having a spermcount check in a couple of days), we have a steady life we earned ourselves and we consciously postponed pregnancy to have stability and calm environment for our future offspring. We did everything by the book. I am so angry  that it didn't pay off. I don't want to give up but it's really hard to go through this all.


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Bela, I know it's hard but you haven't been trying that long in all honesty. No one wants to be one of the 1-in-6 statistics, but you aren't yet so don't beat yourself up and get angry at the world yet. It's good that your DH is having his SA, but remember that it's 12-18 months to get pregnant on average. It's a really hard road and can put a lot of strain on your relationship so don't let it gain control of you. If you get to the 12 months and nothings happened go back to your GP. However, if you are starting to get irregular cycles, and have been off the pill for a year, I am sure your GP will do you some basic bloods to check that OV is occurring, and maybe even an ultrasound if the irregular cycles become a regular thing. Stress can delay ovulation which will in turn delay your period, but it's a good idea to check with your GP to rule anything chemical out of the equation.

Good luck and have a look around the site, you will find lots of ladies who are TTC naturally and who will be able to support you xxx


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## Bela (Mar 26, 2014)

Hello Cloudy, Ladies... 
Thank you for response. You are right and to some it may seem a bit over-the-top to complain after 'only' 6 months, but as Ariella said, to *us* this is real drama. I don't know what's wrong with me, I have to wait for a GP appointment three weeks on average to be told that I just have to be patient, while my friends and neighbours are getting pregnant like the season is open. If I'm healthy and ready, why is it not happening for me? I visualise, I'm hopeful and relaxed, so what am I doing wrong? Every time it didn't work I feel defeated and lifeless like a barren rug-doll, damaged goods. I pick myself up the next day and keep going, but it's becoming too hard. 
In your case Cloudy there were some fertility issues, but in my - nada (that is according to my GP who didn't even send me for proper investigation). In some time I'll be 35 with even less chance for a healthy, natural pregnancy and all I'm hearing is: 'it's normal for conception to take forever'. No, it isn't. That is when everything is in order, it isn't. I can't rely on the health care system to help me even though I'm not a big burden on them, I don't have many children, I work, and contribute in my free time. There's not sympathy for us. We just have to be patient and .

_As to other other ladies on this forum that are TTC for the 1st time, there don't seem to be any posts which fit with my story. _

*Ariella*, I don't know what may work for you but I've decided to turn to unconventional medicine and try herbs. I currently sip Lady's Mantle once/twice a day and take an Agnus Castus tincture. I read extensively about both and they seem to aid fertility. Other than that I keep fit and maintain steady levels of minerals&vits. Hope you manage well and wish you best!


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## Flips (Jul 12, 2012)

Bela, Ariella I know it must seem hard but 6 months isn't very long at all. If you look at the stats well over 80% of women get pregnant within a year of trying, which is why investigations aren't usually offered until after a year. It is quite normal for it to take 6 months to a year to conceive when there are no problems. I hope it works out for you both.


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## Cloudy (Jan 26, 2012)

Bela im sorry if you think that i didn't show understanding or respect of your feelings, I thought I took the time to gave quite a bit of the information I have learnt over 5+ years rather than be dismissive of your pain. For what it's worth we TTC for 2 years before any of my problems were diagnosed, it's not that I expected any problems and to be honest by now I had hoped to have had 2 children.

With regards to other sections on the site there are lots of sections about natural TTC, complimentary therapies etc etc. With regards to agnus castus, just make sure you take it up to ovulation and not after - there is quite a big thread about the dose you can take somewhere: the one they sell is a smaller dose than what really helps.

Good luck x


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## Sheilaweb (Mar 21, 2006)

I think ladies, that however long you've been trying to conceive, whether it's a few months or a few years - it feels like a lifetime....infertility affects us all.

Ariella - did you manage to make an appointment with your gp for ovulation tests and a sperm analysis test.... you can ask for these tests to rule out anything underlying issues....but sadly, unless you have been actively trying to conceive for less than 2 years, your gp cannot refer you for assisted conception.

Keep having regular sex, take folic acid, eat healthily, cut down (or out) cigarettes and alcohol.... it's also useful to bear in mind, that even when there are no fertility issues, some couples can take up to two years to become pregnant naturally anyway.

Wishing you all the very best.

Sheila


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