# IUI August / September 2017



## Sharry (May 13, 2007)

A thread for everybody having IUI treatment in August / September 2017.

Goodluck.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Ladies from the July thread hope you are following me onto this new one. The July thread appears to be locked so I can't reply to you on there 🙁 Anybody here?  🤔 xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Matilda, 
I was thinking of you this morning. Any news? X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey,

I'm glad you have arrived.

AF is due today.. no spotting yesterday it stopped thank goodness however I keep having little mild cramps. If I can get through today and she doesn't arrive I will test in the morning. But I'm not getting carried away.. I feel like she will arrive today.. probally when I'm at work (late shift) which will really be a bummer!

12dpiui today.

How are you?

Loved your last comment by the way lol re: kissing. I love that there is another couple out there similar to us 🤣 x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Matilda,
Eek! The fact that the spotting stopped is a good sign though. It's a terrible feeling dreading going for a wee isn't it. I've got everything crossed for you. Is today the day you could do a test? If I get that far myself I've said I won't test until a day after as I'm a bit scared to test as silly as that sounds. I'm OK but I'm still in the blissful first week where it's not as nerve-wracking, I'm sure by this time next week I'll be going crazy. 
What time do you start work? Distraction is the key today! Good luck! X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Well I'm not actually supposed to test until Friday as per the nurses advice. However my lutuel phase always stays the same so I know today is the day Af should arrive.
I  said straight away to hubby that I would wait out today and test tomorrow - which is only a day early any way.

Yes I thought the fact that the spotting has stopped was positive but then I've looked back at previous charts and in my April Cycle the same thing happened 😳 so I'm not reading anything into it.

Yes I had accupuncture last night and the lady said how she could always stay positive and hopeful on the first week of wait but by the second week it suddenly starts to wear off and all her ladies get very blue 😕

I start at 2pm until 11pm 😵😵😵 really not looking forward to it. My boss is very good though and knows the situation that we are in so if it happens when I am work I might just see if I can take some hours annual leave and come home with a family sized dairy milk or galaxy bar lol x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

I've just found whatever symptoms I have i can't read into it as they're so similar and it's difficult to tell. So I try not to obsess about it but sooner or later end up googling!  I seem to remember from my first pregnancy the month that I was actually pregnant I didn't think I was. It's definitely a mind  at times 😲


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Oh gosh I know. I've been on bloomin google all morning googling the most rediculas things lol I even took my phone in the bath to carry on reading a thread about af symptoms turning into a bfp. 😫

I don't know.. the worst thing is if i dont come on today and I test tomorrow and its negative it will all be down to these blinkin progesterone suppositries lengthening my cycle 😕

Never mind. I desperately need to distract myself but it feels impossible today. X


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Well you're half way through the day... One step at a time. Hopefully work will help distract. Keep us posted and good luck. 🙏🙏🙏🙏 xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Morning Tracey

BFN this morning. AF is over a day late and still no sign. I am absolutely sure its the progesterone suppositries that are causing this. Just want her to show up now so I crack onto IuI number 2.

Im going to stop taking them sunday so hopefully next week I can start cycle 2 x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Matilda I'm sorry it was negative (but she still hasn't arrived yet so hang on in there). 
What are the progesterone suppositories? I've heard of them but I didn't get offered them. How come they can mess with your cycle? 
I know what you mean tho if it's going to come you just want it to come. I had a 43 day cycle once which was just torture. Then when AF turned up I was so angry. You wouldn't turn up that late to a party it's just rude! 
Keeping everything crossed for you that it's a false negative and you'll be able to re test in a couple of days xxx 

Also, not that I want to say this happens all the time (but I hope it is the case for you), I did have a false negative when I was pregnant with my daughter, they do happen. You're not out until AF shows her ugly face xxxxxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Thank you Tracey.

I asked for them as I have had upto 4 days spotting before a period and only a 10 day LP so they can help reduce the spotting and prolong the Lp which theoretically should help sustain a pregnancy more.

I know, I honestly can just tell though, I know you never know but I just want to crack on now with it all and get to the big guns to really give myself a chance.

Don't get me wrong I will so pleasantly surprised if they do work but there is something telling me they wont.

How are you feeling xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Keep us posted 🙏🙏🙏🙏
I'm OK, I have my blood test tomorrow and then after that I'll be into the second week of the two week wait 😬😬😬. Trying not to think too much about that tho. Although I have had a terrible cold this week so the crazy lady within me is thinking oh no will that effect my chances. I can't wait to not be obsessive again 😂 x


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Oh dear that's very grim!

I have heard "them" say that a cold in the 2ww is actually a good sign as alledgedly your immune system is rather low when pg due to the bodies energy focusing on growing the foetus and not empowering the antibodies. However it may be a load of old tosh like a lot of the observations on various forums however you never know! ☺

My fingers are very firmly crossed for you. And I hope this awful week flies by very quickly for you xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Was trying to work out why the July thread wasn't working! Hope everyone is doing well and fingers are crossed for those in the TWW  

I feel behind as I am still stimming ugh. My follicle is just growing so slowly. It's day 14 today and Im praying to reach 18mm at my next scan tomorrow (last it was 16.7mm). Really want to hurry up with the IUI and I keep thinking I'm going to ovulate before I reach the magic 18mm but so far ovulation tests all negative!


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Lol Matilda that comment about colds sent on a fresh frenzy of googling! As with everything to do with pregnancy it may or may not be a sign! 😂 

Hi Jess, yes I didn't realise the post just closes once the month ends. Good luck for tomorrow, fingers crossed you'll have a big juicy follicle ready and waiting. Do you normally have a longer cycle? Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Tracey! I have little to compare to - I have been diagnosed with premature ovarian failure due to chemotherapy so I generally haven't been having periods apart from the odd one at random intervals (often several within a short period of time then none for ages). I was recently switched to a form of HRT that is meant to cause monthly bleeds to restore a more normal state and that was when they discovered this one little follicle so we jumped on it there and then as it being there is a miracle in itself given my diagnosis. Just grateful it is still growing


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh my goodness Jess you have had a tough time. Well you only need one follicle to make a baby and I hope this one is the one. I can imagine it feels like a long wait if the follicle isn't growing as quickly but you may find tomorrow it's plump and ready to mingle. Good luck, let us know how you get on. X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi ladies,

How are you doing today?

Hope your feeling a bit better Tracey.

And Jess glad you found us 😁 buckets of goodluck today. Come on follie.. work your magic. Do let us know how you get on.

Bfn for me again this morning 💩 xxx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thank you guys you've made me feel so welcome, honestly   I was feeling a bit lost because Im new to all this and everyone seems to know so much haha

My lil follicle was 18mm bang on today Im sure the encouragement helped   my trigger shot is due Sunday 3am and then IUI taking place on Monday afternoon. I can't quite believe its going ahead! Little steps and Im not getting any hopes up but even if it doesn't work this time, the fact I have responded at all gives me hope  

So sorry to hear another BFN Matilda   still no sign of AF? Could there still be a chance do you think that must be so frustrating  

Thoughts are with everyone coming up to the weekend <3 xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess

That is absolutely brilliant news 😀😉🤗 Follie is coming along absolutely perfectly 💓 yey for trigger shot and dreaded 2ww!
You really deserve your share of fertility happiness.. sending lots of luck your way.

Well 14dpiui today so if I was going to get a positive I should have by now. Going to stop the progesterone tomorrow if its still bfn in the morning as I'm past OTD. And then hopefully I swifly roll onto cycle 2 x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hooray for the big fat follicle Jess! 🙋 exciting times ahead over the next few days for you. We'll be here to keep you company in the 2WW! 💛

Ah Matilda seriously?!  That's so disappointing. Like you say if it hasn't worked then you just want to get cracking onto the next phase. When will you test again if AF doesn't show up? Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Tracey, thanks Matilda   glad to have some company on the TWW   Im going to try just forget about it but I know it will drag!

Sorry to hear that Matilda, thats crappy news  definitely good to just get cracking, hopefully things will get back into their swing once you stop the progesterone so you can go on with your 2nd cycle. (Although Im still hoping maybe your BFP is lurking and will show its face  ) 

I had a question about the next stage if it hasn't been successful - do you have to wait for another month to start again or do you literally just call them as soon as AF comes the first time for another day 2 scan? 

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess, I assume you can just crack on the following month but I'm not 100% sure, I'm on my first cycle and self funding so if this one doesn't work for us we'll probably take the next month off before deciding how much more money we're going to plough into this. But I can't see any reason why you can't just start again straight away, I know you can with clomid. X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Tracey - that makes sense, how are you doing today? And Matilda hope you are also fine, has AF showed up?

I had my trigger shot in the night, was quite nervous but it went fine and didn't hurt - I keep feeling like I should feel different somehow but I don't haha  

xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess, I didn't feel too different whilst taking the stimulants but I'd say about 24 hours after doing the trigger shot I had mild cramps which then got worse after the insemination. Not wanting to panic you just to say it's normal as I was quite worried as I had sharp stabbing pains about 24 hours after the insemination which I wasn't expecting. 
I'm OK, checking with the hospital tomorrow that I've ovulated as I had a blood test for that last Friday. And then I am on countdown until Friday for either AF or finally my BFP. 
Good luck for tomorrow afternoon, in a non creepy way I'll be thinking of you 😂
Any updates from you Matilda? Hope you're OK. X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah ok thanks for the heads up I will look out for that! Sorry if this is a basic question but did you just resume normal activity for the rest of the day after your IUI?

What I have had since Friday is incredibly bad leg cramps - as if I have run a marathon! I thought maybe it could be the FSH injections but it was day 14-15 of using them so seems strange if its that after being fine all that time.

Glad to hear you're doing ok, keeping my fingers firmly crossed for your BFP! Thats interesting you had a blood test to check you've ovulated - what does it test for? I asked my nurse if they would check but she said no because ovitrelle definitely makes you ovulate!

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Morning Jess, 
They say to take it easy the day you have it done (no heavy lifting or running about) but after that first day you can just carry on as normal. 
Well I've had light bleeding this morning and feeling a bit crampy so I don't think it's worked for us. I'm a bit hacked off tho as not due until Friday and I kinda thought that was the point of these timed cycles. It's caught me off guard coming so early but I don't even have time to react to it as you just have to carry on with day to day life. Think it's going to be a chocolate day 😔😔😔😔

And the blood test was just to confirm that I did ovulate. I guess it's another one of those things that vary between hospitals xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi ladies 

Hope you have both been well.

Jess - You can go straight into your next cycle and do back to back IUI's as long as a pesky cyst hasnt raised its head.
Great news about getting to trigger.. have you had your IUI now? 😀

How are you getting in Tracey.. if it is a very light bleeding / spotting try not to get too down just yet.. you never know and you arent out until she full blown arrives. Easier said then done I know.

After stopping the stupid Progesterone AF arrived within 24 hours. So Cd2 for me so straight back on the clomid.  What is really annoying is my clinic arent answering the phone for me to book in for my 5 day scan.. Ive left a message.. I will harass them more later.

Out of interest Jess how many funded cycles have you been granted if you dont mind me asking.. I was alloted 3.. on number 2 now xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Clinic have just called literally having just pressed send in the last message all booked in for Thursday.

I have decided that I really need to keep my mind more active this cycle and me and DH have decided to try and take a trip away in 2ww to keep me sane. Also have started decorating the house.. my last day off today and Im blinking cream crackered however its beginning to look like a little palace so very happy  

Also having re read through the messages it looks like you have had your IUI Jess? 2ww now yey 😄😄xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Sorry to hear your first cycle didn't work Matilda but sounds like you've got your game face on ready for cycle 2! Is clomid what you take during the cycle with IUI then? I was on gonal something or other. 
No I'm on my second tampon of the day (TMI) so I can stop kidding myself. I'm just confused that it's so early tho. I've emailed the hospital to ask if that's normal but they haven't responded yet. I just assumed that if I was going to come on it would on or about the day that they said it would, they seemed pretty certain about it too. I haven't told my husband yet, I'm sick of being the bearer of bad news and don't want to have to do it this time. Ugh I'm so sad 😔😔

Hope today goes well for you Jess xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey guys, so I just got home from my IUI. Im not sure quite what I was expecting but it was so quick etc feels like a bit of an anti-climax! My sperm total numbers/motility etc were great though so Im really pleased about that.  

Tracey - Im really sorry to hear AF has come, that is really crappy news  I can imagine it must be difficult to have to tell your husband but you're in this together and it isn't your fault. It doesn't make it any easy but Ive heard that the best chance of success with IUI is on the 2nd go so you never know, your next try (whenever you decide to do that) could be your lucky one. For now though gentle hugs and take care of yourself  

Matilda - glad to hear you have now been booked in for Thursday. Sorry the last round wasn't successful but sounds like you've got your game face on for round 2. Decorating and a little holiday sound fab. I really believe staying positive/not stressing plays an important role - it seems more than just coincidence that when I had accepted my diagnosis and that I would need donor eggs etc and it wasn't consuming my every thought, that was when I started having periods and then they found my one follicle! I so hope the next time is successful for you  

In terms of me, Matilda, I am self-funding this cycle. Unfortunately, my hospital messed up big time and didn't tell me that the chemo would make me infertile - of course I would have frozen my eggs. I was in a long term relationship then but things became very difficult and we are no longer together. When I was diagnosed with premature ovarian failure, I was told that I would likely need egg donation but the longer I wait the less chance I have of conceiving naturally - but when I started having some resumption of ovarian function they said they'd be willing to try IUI but it was a time dependent thing. (IVF will never be possible for me because I won't produce enough follicles). I made the decision then that trying to have a child is more important to me, than not having a partner. When they found my one follicle it was such a miracle that I couldn't not try - I knew I would regret it if it was my only chance. 

Obviously being single means I don't classify for funding, but I've been told that I also won't classify for any form of fertility treatment even with a partner because people on chemo are only allowed NHS funding if they froze their eggs (which I wasn't given the chance to do) - my FSH is so high that they would think the rate of success is not worth them paying for it. The clinic said I can appeal and theres a chance they may fund an egg donation given my unique situation but that theres no guarantee. It seems dreadfully unfair. My parents are supporting this cycle but funds are going to limit what I can do. Im only 26 and I don't have a lot of savings   The only positive I suppose is that egg donation, unlike IUI for me, is not time dependent in the same way so maybe I will have a partner by the time I reach that stage - either way it seems like a long journey.

But you never know maybe my miracle follicle will be just that!

Thinking of you both a lot, xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess 💛 wow what a journey you've been on already. I can't believe you don't get any NHS funding given your situation. It does seem very unfair but then I guess we can't dwell on the things we can't change. Your follicle does sound like a miracle and who knows, the minis may be hooking up as we speak 🙏
I've had a good old sob with my husband tonight, not sure I feel much better for it but we remind ourselves that we're blessed already to have one cheeky monkey. We're sitting this cycle out and will decide over the next week or so whether to give IUI another go or just go straight to IVF. We're self funding like you and our thought is are we just wasting our money with IUI and should we just spend that money on IVF. I knoe neither are guaranteed but IVF has a better success rate than IUI as it gets over more of the hurdles. I'm not sure though, we only have savings to pay for one go and if that didn't work out I don't know how I would cope. I also think about what I could do for my daughter with that money and should I just stop. 😔 it's definitely not a decision making night. Sorry to be a negative nelly, I am super excited for your story Jess, I hope it has a good ending. Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thank you for your kind message Tracey - the treatment was something I needed so whilst I hate that this has happened, I have to believe it has taken me on the journey for some reason. I know I will be a mum and whether that is now, through egg donation, sperm donation, with a partner or adoption, I am determined I'll never give up. I am young and that is one thing in my favour!

My heart breaks for you tonight. This isn't something you would wish on your worst enemy and please don't apologise - it isn't that your being negative, there are just so many aspects to this. I see your point about IUI vs IVF and I think if I was self-funding and knew that was an option I would agree to your logic and probably would go straight to IVF. (But I don't know your individual problems and Im probably one of the less clued on people on this forum so I am not speaking with any particular expertise lol). 

It saddens me so much that fertility has been turned into a money making business. We are all limited by it, from the ovulation kits to the meds, the treatment, the scans, its so hard. Would you consider going abroad? I have heard that you can almost get 2 IVF cycles at a similar price to 1 in the UK in some places. Maybe something to research but please take some time to not think about anything fertility, you need to have a break. And please don't feel you need to come on here we will quite understand if we don't hear from you for a bit! 

Take some time to restock and gather your thoughts, tonight you definitely have permission to pig out on some chocolate or other form of comfort food, hug your daughter and let your husband be there for you <3 

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey,

Thank you, yes I certainly have, just aiming to get through IUI's in one peice so that can I move on to something that I feel will be more likely to work for me.

Yes I take Clomid days 2-6 and then menopur injectables. Last cycle I took the menopur on days 5, 7 and 9 however I think that can change every cycle so will have to wait and see. 

So sorry to hear about AF Tracy, what a kick in the teeth that she came early. Did you hear anything back from your email? 

I completely understand how absolutely awful it is to be the bearer of bad news all of the time. It is horrendous however I am glad to hear that you are both discussing the future. Infertility is such a cruel disease and Jess is complete and utterly right when she says that it is now a sickening money spinner. I completely and utterly feel for you and we are always here if you need to talk.
I think your making the right decision re: taling a good old week or so to think and talk things over.

As Jess says I am aware that going abroad can really make a difference financially however I'm not sure how you would feel regarding that. There are some chains on here about lady who went abroad for her IUI' .. I think to Denmark. 

You certainly have a lot of thinking to do as the game is not over and you still have options, although it probally doesnt feel like that atm. 

Thoughts are with you xxx

Hi Jess..

I could not have felt less underwhelmed after my first IUI, like you I posted about it on here. Anti Climax is most definately the correct word to describe it 😕

Oh Jess.. I can not even begin to imagine what you have been through. How utterly awful! 

I had no idea that you were going at this.. I'm going to use the term "alone" however it sounds like you have an amazing supportive  family network.

I was 27 when I started TTC and I'm going to say something that my former self would punch my present self in the face for as it drove me insane but you are still young.. if things do not work this cycle you really do have years to save and save and save. I suppose that it just one aspect I would take solice in clinging to if I was you. However Miracle Follie may now be on the way to being Miracle Embryo/ Blastocyst. You never know. Fingers are so so tightly crossed for you. Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi Matilda, good to hear from you <3 how are you bearing up? 

Thanks for being so kind, you're right I have a long time still ahead of me and that is definitely a blessing. In some ways, the extreme of my diagnosis saves a lot of grief - it was made clear to me from the start I would need help so I bypassed trying to conceive naturally, I also was told it would probably only be worth doing 2 IUI's attempting to use my own eggs (almost as a formality than a real option) before resigning to egg donation. So I had already come to terms with the idea in many ways and it will save me the many years trying other things first if that makes any sense at all?!

You never know, I could have struck lucky with my miracle follie   but if I haven't, I'll be okay. 

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

That makes perfect sense. And yes, we must all be positive and then positive things will happen 😄

How are you feeling today?

I feel exhausted, fell a sleep at 5.30pm yesterday, husband woke me up, straight back to sleep at 8.30pm and slept through until my alarm this morning. Clomid and stims really take it out of me. Had bags under my eyes this morning for the first time ever.. not attractive lol.

Never mind.. it will all be worth it in the end x


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hi Ladies!

I would like to join your thread to pass the time until my second IUI in September. As you can see in my signature I already had a briefly successful first IUI in July, but lost that pregnancy a week after my positive HPT. 
Now, another week later, I am no longer fighting tears back every minute of every day and am even starting to look forward to my next Kopenhagen-Trip in September.


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Thanks for your kind words Jess and Matilda. I think I'm about drawing a close on my pity party. I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed with what to do next but know that I don't have to make a decision anytime soon. Who knows we may get lucky this month when we try it the old fashioned way. The nurse didn't really acknowledge my question about whether it was common to have a short leutral phase when on IUI, her response was did I want to book in for this cycle (which made me cross) and then she said next time they could give me the pessaries to help lengthen then leutral phase. Which also made me cross as I wasn't offered them (in my ignorance I didn't really know about them) but they knew that I have shorter cycles so I do feel a bit let down that they didn't recommend them to me but theres little point getting worked up about that now. Regarding going abroad it is something I'll read up on but I have a feeling that it would be problematic for us given our little one. Not a lot of our family/friends know about our situation not that I would want to leave my daughter at home but equally don't think it would be right to bring her with us. 🤔 again it's another option to think about. For now that I'm going to have red wine, chocolate and caffeine. Hope you are both feeling OK as you go through this cycle. As ever I have everything crossed. 

Hi Phoenix, how are you? How cruel for you to go through the process and win only for it to be taken away from you. It's good to hear you're feeling better and ready to go again, this process does really test our resilience doesn't it. Can I ask why you decided to go abroad, is it ridiculously cheaper? X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey guys, cor isn't this rain horrible!

Tracey - I can imagine its all quite overwhelming at the moment, and there is that feeling of needing to hurry up cos you feel like a time bomb, but a few months or even longer here or there, will make no difference either way. Its important to do whats best for you (and as always fingers are crossed the old fashioned way pulls through for you!). That sounds frustrating with the nurse - Im afraid I'm not very clued up on the luteal phase, does that mean AF comes before OTD? 

I found that frustrating at my clinic too with them saying well we will know for next time, as if my first go was basically just a practise run! I do get the logic but when you're spending that much you want them to treat it as a proper try. I see your point with going abroad - though I have read of others couples that have taken little ones with them, that is obviously a major upheaval and not something to undertake lightly. Hope you are feeling a little 'better' (I know its not that easy)  

Phoenix - hi and welcome, how awful for you that you lost your pregnancy - that must have been heartbreaking I can't even imagine - sending you big hugs. So glad to hear that you are feeling a bit better and ready for your next try. And hopefully this one will be the one that works and sticks   Have you had both your IUI's done in Kopenhagen? Im assuming your in the Uk and went abroad for it but maybe you aren't?

Matilda - hey, aw sounds like you're in need of a jolly few lie ins, catch up on some sleep! I was surprisingly tired during stims too - I wonder if the hormones cause it but also I wasn't sleeping very well on the night before each scan cos I was worrying I think so that didn't help! But you're right it will be worth it! Take care of yourself   is your appt tomorrow or am I getting confused? 

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I also have a short luteal phase, and yes, that means AF would be due before OTD. Basically my temperature was only ever high for 10-12 days and many docs want to see at least 12 or even 14 days. And no matter how late I ovulated, my cycle always ended on day 27, so I sometimes only had an 11-day-luteal-phase, which cuts it very short for implantation, which can happen on any day between day 6 and 12. My doc prescribed the progesterone pessaries at the first mention of a short second half of my cycle. That gave me some peace, because I was worried that implantation might not happen fast enough before bleeding starts.

I am from Germany where IUIs for single women are not allowed due to potential legal difficulties with paternal claims. The trip to Kopenhagen is a bit long, expensive and complicated, but the clinic is great and the experience was really good last month. The UK would be more expensive for me and Belgium and the Netherlands (also legal for single women there) are not as good regarding the quality of treatment... at least that is what I hear. Additionally, the websites of the clinics there were not as informative and it was hard to even find what I was looking for. The clinics in Denmark always have an English or even German version, so it was much easier to find the answers to my million questions.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah thanks for the explanation about the luteal phase Phoenix - I don't know about my luteal phase as my periods haven't really been regular due to having premature ovarian failure and being on HRT patches. I had three within 6 weeks but then they switched me to a different type of patch which is meant to cause a bleed every 28 days similar to normal but I had only had one bleed when I did my IUI so I have no idea if its long or short lol 

Im glad that they took your short luteal phase into account for your IUI it sounds like the progesterone pessaries might have helped. Its a pain you're not able to have your treatment in Germany - I didn't know that it wasn't allowed, but sounds like your clinic in Kopenhagen is decent. The UK definitely seems to be expensive but then Im not sure how it compares to other countries! 

Wishing you lots of luck for your upcoming cycle - do keep us in the loop, when will you be due to start?

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I weirdly already had 1 follicle at 14 mm on Monday, which means that this follicle started developing immediately after the pregnancy stopped at a time when I didn't know yet and was still hoping the bleeding was normal spotting. 
I will have to let this follicle go, because I was still bleeding until yesterday and there is no way there is a good endometrial lining for implantation. But the good news is that I am already halfway through that missed cycle, so I hope I can do the second IUI between September 8-14.

Where are you during all of this?


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi all  me and my hubby started this process 3 years ago but my hubby popped the question so we stopped everything concentrated on the wedding  We started our journey again in February 2017 took ages between apts but we had iui treatment last Friday 4th August .... which was absolutely fine no pain at all..I had two big juicy follicles either side at 19mm  The Sunday after I was really poorly had the sickness bug &#129314;which wiped me out for a couple days but no symptoms at all ... had my trigger shot on Wednesday morning and had slight cramping today but they said that trigger could cause that ... when did everyone start having symptoms? Beginning to think it'a not worked  2WW is the longest ever!!! X

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jane, have you had the insemination or is that tomorrow then (trying to work out the hours!) I had cramping about 24 hours after the injection up until the procedure and I was worried about that it had made me ovulate too early and we'd miss the window. Nurse assured me that it was rare that would happen. I then had really bad cramps and sharp stabbing pains for a few days after the insemination. Fingers crossed for you. Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Phoenix, that follicle seems quite big already! Its a shame it has to go to waste but at least you're further along so your next cycle will come quicker. I am in the UK, based in London and am on the TWW now as I had my IUI carried out on Monday, so still quite early days. Every time I go to the toilet Im scared I will have a period  

Hi Jane and welcome, I was a bit confused by your dates! Have you already had your IUI or it will be tomorrow? I didn't have any cramping but I was told it can happen and I remember Tracey had mentioned she did. I haven't really had any symptoms but they told me its unlikely you'll get pregnancy symptoms in the TWW - I think people tend to read more into any slight symptoms they experience (understandably!) so I wouldn't worry about not having any! Fingers are crossed this will be a successful cycle for you - have you had IUI done before previously?

This one is a question for everyone - has anyone noticed extra discharge in TWW? I have noticed more today and a slight tinge to it (it doesn't smell bad but smells of something - sorry TMI!). Im doing my pessaries rectally so its not just that dripping out as it were, I was wondering if it could be related to the progesterone though. But I had a little freak out today and thought what if I only just ovulated, even though I had the trigger shot on Sunday. I know my body isn't exactly responding in the normal way but I really hope that isn't the case as my IUI was on Monday! Ugh sorry this probably makes no sense haha 

Love to all tonight xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi all thank you for replying I had the insemination last Friday ... so only a week and two days left before I can test 

Hi justjazzyjess ..This is our first cycle ... I have woken up this morning with awful back pain and cramping ... which is what I tend to get when I come on my period really hope it's not ... due on my period next week so fingers crossed... yes I have extra discharge as well no tinge to it it's clear ... is it normal lol ?

Hi Tracey1409 as I said had the insemination last Friday so had my trigger shot on Wednesday and come Friday afternoon when I went to the clinic I got terrible cramping which I was then really worried that the insemination was going to hurt but it was fine and the nurse reassured me that it was ovulation pain ... as no one really went through what the trigger shot was for why I had to have it etc ... I asked but wasn't very clear and loaded with so much other information maybe I missed bits 

When are you all due to test?

Xxx

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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi ladies,

Hope your all well.

How are you holding up Tracey? Have you come to any decisions yet or is it still all bounding around in your head? Have been thinking about you.

Hope your well too Jess. How many dpiui are you now?
  
Im cd6, had my scan yesterday.. all good with no cysts etc so full steam ahead for take 2. Started the menopur last night, so only two more to go hopefully.

My cd11 is booked in for Wednesday with the view to doing the Iui Friday if all is well. 

Back on the menopur hot flushes in the middle of the night 😡 has anybody else had this as a side effect xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Matilda 💛 sorry to hear about the hot flushes did you get them last time? Feels like your next go is coming around quick! Hope your scan on weds shows big fat follicles that are raring to go. 

I'm definitely not as emotional about it all now. I'm thinking I might give iui another go but only because I keep wondering what difference it would have made if they'd offered my the pessaries. It's just made me think now that if I do have a shorter leutral phase if that's been the problem all this time. (as nothing else has come up in all our tests) I guess I'm looking for a reason to attribute the problem to as the whole unexplained thing just frustrates me! But I am still unsure about whether IUI is the right thing to spend our money on or if we should just go for it with IVF but I also know that's not guaranteed. I guess it's just because we have limited go's. I'm sure we'll figure it out! X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey 

7 days is a really short LP.. as Ive mentioned before mine is 10 days and that is considered borderline or even too short. Have you looked into the causes of a LP defect. From a quick google it could stem from too much excercise, obesity or your thyroid? Have you had this checked? Another cause could be pcos.. this is my cause I would have thought but that would have been picked up on your scans already.

Its certainly something to think about to give yourself the possible shot next time.

With ivf.. at my clinic the pessaries are compulsary.

Bless you, such an agonising time, its so helpful to have this forum as a sounding board though. 

Yes mine is certainly coming along and yes I had the hot flushes in the early hours last time.. still i would much rather have them in bed rather than through the day xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Tracey, glad you're feeling less emotional, this process makes us all very good at shelving these things and pushing forwards, doesn't it   So tricky to decide whether try another IUI or go straight to IVF. Is this something you can discuss with a doctor, see what they would recommend given your short luteal phase? Can you remind me have you only had one IUI so far? Definitely regardless which you choose, it sounds like the pessaries would be a good idea.

Hi Matilda, Im now 4 days piui?! Feel fine, no symptoms but also don't feel any different so convinced it hasn't worked but I guess I'm still early days. Glad to hear all is ready for take 2 and everythings booked in. Fingers crossed lots of follicles are growing nice and big and juicy as we speak   I didn't take menopur so not sure about the hot flushes - is that an injectable? 

Hey Jane, it was my first cycle too - still feel a little lost and only just getting to grips with all the lingo haha! I know you can get some side effects from the progesterone so try not to worry. My fingers are firmly crossed that your period won't come on. Im due to test on Tuesday 22nd so still ages!

Hope everyones feeling okay today, Im off to my family home for a birthday and family gathering over the weekend, which at least will provide me with a good distraction. If I go quiet that will be why but will be thinking of you guys!

Xx


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## jessc (Dec 31, 2013)

Hi my husband and I have been trying to conceive for just over 7 years, with 1 miscarriage, I have had my first round of Iui and am just trying to get through the very long anxious wait until I can take my pg test on Sunday. I'm sure my mind and body is playing tricks on me. I feel like I have the odds stacked against me for it to work the first time as they found I have a cyst and my husbands sample wasn't as strong as it could have been, so I'm hoping and preying for a positive result on Sunday x x


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi jess and welcome (we have the same name hehe  ) Im sorry to hear its been such a long and difficult journey for you and your husband already. Will be keeping everything crossed for a positive result on Sunday - not many more sleeps to go now! Im also on the first try and feel like its so unlikely to get pregnant first go but it does happen, so lets just keep hoping    

Keep us updated xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Fingers crossed for you to justjazzyjess my lovely!! I am due to test 20th August  Me to still not used to the lingo at all ... so nice to have this chat to support one another though as talk to my hubby about it but you need others to talk to as well as not many people know about our journey ... how are you feeling? How many follicles did you have? We were told there is risk of twins  xx

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Matilda, I don't think I need to worry abut too much exercise 😂 and no the other things aren't a concern to me either. They checked for PCOS when we were first referred which came back clear. It's just so frustrating that I've been pregnant and had a baby before and now for whatever reason it just won't happen. 

It was my first go this round Jess. In the beginning we said we would only do one cycle because the stats were so much lower to IVF but now I'm leaning towards giving IUI another go with the pessaries. Good idea to maybe have a chat with the hospital though about my cycle etc. They don't often have the consultants in but the nurse is pretty knowledgeable so hopefully she'll have some advice. 

Have a good weekend everyone, everyone that's in the 2WW I hope it's not too agonising for you all. Xxxxxxx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi Jane - ah I thought you meant this Sunday! Our test dates are quite close then  fingers are very crossed - risk of twins is great as Im guessing that means you had a few follies? I only had one but I have a diagnosis of premature ovarian failure so the fact I had one was pretty much a miracle in itself - Im just praying for the whole it only takes one lol. I feel fine and have no real symptoms to be honest. I have had some discharge but that could be for any reason including the progesterone so who knows haha

Hey Tracey, I thought I remembered it being your first round. It must be frustrating that you've been pregnant before with no issues! I just wondered do you usually have a shorter than 28 day cycle and is that a recent thing - or was that the same when you conceived your daughter? Are you still feeling like IUI with pessaries might be a good bet? Also if its any consolation, I have heard theres a higher rate of success on 2nd round IUI, don't know if its just the cumulative increase of trying twice but you never know with our bodies lol!

Hi to Matilda and everyone else - hope everyone is doing okay <3 
Xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Morning all ... AF arrived last night absolutely gutted  didn't even get to do a test ... on to the next cycle!! Just annoy the unanswered questions why hasn't it worked? They said it was superb sample but it hasn't worked on me.... everything was going so well! Hey ho ... hope it works for all you lovely people this time round ... fingers crossed &#129310;&#127995; xxx

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Sorry to hear AF arrived Jane, I know you're obviously feeling gutted, my go was a bit like yours in that I had two follicles and sperm was strong but mine came 5 days early too which I wasn't expecting. I wasn't offered the pessaries though which I'm going to request next time. Do you have pessaries?  Like you say on to the next cycle and hopefully it will be your successful one.

Hi Jess 💛, how are you going as you head into the final countdown? I've got everything crossed now. I didn't really have any trouble conceiving first time round, we managed it on the third go so I hadn't got to the point where I am now where I've got a backlog of cycle dates! I do remember having one odd short cycle but we were moving house so stress levels were high. Over the last two years I've had anything from 22 to 43 day cycles but we've had a few hard times so I do think my body reacts to stress in a shorter cycle. I guess on average it's 25/26 days which isn't massively short but obviously a few extra days on the leutral phase could be the  helping hand we need. Who knows?!? (nobody is the answer!) xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi Tracey1409 No I wasn't offered pessaries what do they do? Yes I am absolutely gutted literally don't know what to do with myself and my poor hubby doesn't know what to say or do as there are no answers just hasn't worked this time round .. what's worse is my cousin is due any day now with her second it's going to be so hard  are you on your second round of iui Tracey? Xx

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

And yes we're going to give it one more go at the end of this month (unless of course mother nature wants to get that pole out of her **** and stop being such a 👹 and let us conceive naturally 🙏 I'm not holding my breath but I haven't lost hope... Yet!) x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jane, it's so hard 😔 it's almost like a grieving process though you just have to let yourself go through the motions. 

The pessaries are for progesterone, which apparently help lengthen the leutral phase, I didn't know about them until I'd read something on here. Basically the longer your leutral phase is the more time there is for the lining to be thicker/implantation to occur. I read on here that some women are offered them and some aren't it just depends. I was annoyed as my hospital knew I had shorter cycles so I think I should have had them. But that will teach me not to research more as had I known I might have asked. I'll be doing my second cycle at the end of this month, I couldn't cope with getting back on it so soon but also as we're self funding we have to watch our pennies. 

Are you taking some time off work or just trying to crack on? It's no comfort I knoe but you will feel better in a few days xxxx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Ahh ok will ask for those aswell them second time round as mine are a lot shorter cycle to ... thank you for saying about them ... they knew about mine aswell they even scanned me earlier as I have shorter cycle  no same here mine will be mid September now fingers crossed for you lovely &#129310;&#127995;I am back at work I took quite abit of time off when I was having the treatment scanning so would feel to bad taking more time off but it's keeping my mind off of it to although the AF pain isn't lol  but not as heavy as I normally have it so that's good  when do you start the injections? Xx

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

It helps to keep busy but it does just feel like the whole world is up the duff sometimes doesn't it. 

I'm currently cd9 so I'm assuming my next cycle will start end of August/beginning of September so will start then. Last time I did the injections for 5 days and we were ready to go so it was good in a way that it was quite a quick cycle for me. I'm wondering if there will be any side effects after the meds last time though that will shorten or lengthen this cycle. 🤔 x


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah Jane Im so sorry to hear AF arrived    it somehow feels worse not making it to test date but in some ways maybe that provides more info on the nature of your conception problems as it sounds like you could have a shorter cycle like Tracey so definitely worth asking about the progesterone pessaries, mine are called cyclogest and I have one twice a day but I think there are other types/doses. Whats the plan next are you going straight into round 2 or having a break?

Tracey, it must be difficult when you conceived quite quickly last time to remember things like cycle length etc - there was a time when we weren't so attune to all these things, but when you start down this route you suddenly are charting everything haha. I didn't realise you had such a quick cycle last time with only 5 days of injections! Did your follicles just grow very quickly or were they already quite big? I think thats more of a positive for IUI though as it seems like you have less of a problem with the making follicles part, and hopefully if we can just sort out this luteal phase!

I had a very stressful event yesterday - which I won't go into but I was in a situation of extreme upset/fear/stress - fight or flight type thing (don't worry I am fine now) but I can't help wondering if it will have harmed my chances if I even was pregnant, as I know stress can be bad in early pregnancy. I felt some left sided cramps afterwards and Im not sure if I was imagining it because I was afraid something like that might happen! I probably am not anyway, and I wasn't going to say anything but I just feel unsettled and I haven't really got anyone else to tell! 

Other than that though, no news, no symptoms and Im now exactly a week from testing. I have been quite spotty on my face which I don't usually get but I'm thinking thats maybe progesterone related? Although surprising that it has systemic effects as you would think it would be more local being a pessary.

Big love to all of you, and extra for you Jane today,  look after yourself  Xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Oh poor you justjazzyjess what happened? Hope all ok now? Big hugs  Our mind plays tricks on us for sure sometimes hopefully it's all in the mind and you will get that result in a weeks time and it won't if affected anything fingers crossed for you &#129310;&#127995; 
We are going to wait for my next period now which will be beginning of sept now so ready for round two kind of 

Tracey we could be starting at a similar time  I literally have two weeks from last day to beginning again ... how many follicles did you have last cycle?

Xx

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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Jess I hope you're OK! It's hard not to be anxious or stressed during this time anyway but don't worry I'm sure whatever happened won't have affected your chances. Hoping you're keeping busy to try and take your mind of symptom spotting! 

Last time I had a scan on cd2 and I had two follicles that were 1.0, then on cd7 I had one follicle at 1.8 and one at 1.9, so I responded quickly to the meds but for whatever reason it all ended before I had chance to get stressed into the second week of the 2WW! Wasn't meant to be and all that 😕 x


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks guys, you've somehow put my mind at rest or I have been too busy for the rest of the day to dwell on things! I was threatened by someone a lot bigger than me and it was quite scary but am fine, thanks for your kind words   

I am on summer holidays at the moment, but have a load of babysitting/childcare booked in so am being kept constantly busy which is good as it keeps me from watching the time tick by (and helps save money for this damn malarkey!) 

Ooo you guys sound like you might end up falling quite close to each other then! Hoping and praying that round 2 is the magic number. Tracey they sound fab numbers! Just frustrating it ended quickly - either it just wasn't meant to be that time (and hopefully will be this time!) or perhaps its related to the implantation - typing as I think here but for both you and Jane, in theory if your lining starts to break down faster due to a shorter cycle then it wouldn't be in its ideal state for implantation according to the number of days that implantation should happen after fertilisation - so if they can fix that hopefully your chances will be much greater. Does that make any sense or am I turning into a wannabe doctor   

Another day done, another day closer! 

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Jess that sounds terrible. Hope you're not too shaken up by it. There are some idiots in this world. 

Lol your diagnosis is what I was thinking also but we'll see if the pessaries make any difference. My only worry now is I've read that sometimes after having fertility treatment (and it seems more common after IVF) is that it can make your next cycle longer, sometimes up to two weeks. So not only do you have the "it's a BFN but my period hasn't arrivrd" hell but also it's just waiting and extra time before you can start again. It might not happen and I'm try not to worry about it but I guess I'm just used to obsessing over something. 

Are you due to test on Monday Jess? 

How are you feeling today Jane? X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hello Ladies
Can I join your thread? I've been reading it but have resisted joining until now because last month I got a bit obsessed by checking.
So Sorry to those of you who have had BFN's and much love and empathy to those of you in the TWW.
I'm on my second natural IUI. I'm due to test on Sat. This is my third day of pretty constant period type pains mainly just light but they get worse at points. I feel like my period is about to start but it's only day 23 of my cycle.
I've got a new lease of hope today as I woke up sweating in the night, keep going hot today and most significantly there's a really slight change in my areola they just look a tiny bit bigger than normal, tbh I probably wouldn't notice if I wasn't obsessing!! I'm hoping I don't have to post later that my AF has arrived.
How is everyone else doing today?
Daisy xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Actually reading that back it's wrong, my period is due on Sat, I'm due to test on Mon xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi daisy 🌼 hope you're OK. Did you have similar symptoms last time do you remember? It's frustrating that the symptoms are so similar. Are you testing on Monday then? Fingers crossed for you and hopefully the time won't drag too long for you. Quick question given this is your second go, did your hospital/clinic give any insight into why it didn't work? I guess as yours was natural there wasn't too much they could do differently this time round? I'm just curious whether they learn anything from our failed cycles and do anything differently? Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Tracy
Thanks for your reply.
No, no reasons in fact I only spoke to a consultant v quickly on the phone to decide whether to do another natural cycle or to try medicated.
They'd originally said it had only a 14 percent chance of working for me, which would go up to 18 percent if I did a medicated cycle. So I just assumed I was on the other 86 percent. 
Daisy x


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi Tracey - ugh yeah hopefully that won't happen with you. I wonder why it makes the next cycle longer - do you mean the injections take longer or it takes longer for AF to come to get started in the first place? Try not to obsess, I know its hard! I was obsessing about being excessively tired today - but I think Im just lazy and I was running after little ones all day yesterday so that could be why  Im testing Tuesday! Seems like the week is speeding up now!

Hey Daisy - welcome to the group! It sounds like you're having some symptoms hopefully in this case thats a good sign - the cramps could be from implantation maybe, fingers crossed its not AF! I haven't had any symptoms so feeling like mine probably hasn't worked   Our test dates are so close, Im testing on Tuesday!

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess - I'd read the your AF can be delayed the cycle after a failed treatment but I'll just have to wait and see. Not too much longer to go now then, any more symptoms? X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah right okay, fingers crossed it won't and you'll be on track to go ahead straight away! When is AF meant to be due?

No symptoms and I was naughty today. I had decided I wouldn't buy a pregnancy test until the day before OTD and was going to get a digital one for best results, but then was sorting out bedding and happened to find an old one in the cupboard - its not digital so I was like may as well use it since its here  . Needless to say it was a BFN although for a moment I could have sworn there was a veryveryvery faint line but I think just wishful thinking   Doesn't really mean much as its not test day but I still felt that disappointment and am feeling more like its going to be negative now  

My fault anyway! 

How is everyone else doing? Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Jess that's naughty! 🙈 don't be disheartened tho coz even the first response test which is the uber early one is like 4 days before you're due on. At least the test is gone now and there's no temptation! 

Goodness knows when I'll come on currently cd10 but I haven't ovulated yet (according to the **** sticks) so just got to sit it out. Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Haha I know, definitely no more temptation and Im not buying anymore, don't even know why I did it just once I had it in my hand I couldn't not lol  

Ah ok, hopefully ovulation comes soon, good old widdle sticks, the things we do ey!

Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Tracey and JJJ

How's it going Tracey? I keep trying to read back on the thread to see where you are at but my phone doesn't like going back a page and it keeps logging me out. Can you give me a mini history ( only if you want to obviously) 
JJJ hope you've managed not to test again! I've not been tempted to test early as I've been away and my one test is at home.. will be hard from tonight though when I get back.

I know this is bad but I've let myself get excited that this one has worked. Still no AF and no pre period migraine which I always get. My AF is due tomorrow but I can't help thinking if it was coming it would have started after 3 days of AF pain.
My stomach just feels different. I was wide awake last night just excited that it might have worked trying to work out how to describe the feeling. The best I can come up with is you know when you've been bursting for the loo and you finally go but afterwards your bladder feels kind of heavy and stretched ... that's what my stomach has felt like constantly for last few days together with a kind of nervous knot feeling... that part probably is nervousness!!
Love to you both, Daisy xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Hope you are all well.

I've had a read back to catch up on everybody.

Tracey.. very glad to hear that you have made your decision on how you would like to move forward. I hope that you feel better now that you have a plan 😊 Was your last cycle medicated and how many follicles did you have.. I can't remember? 

Jess.. you made me laugh reading about the test you found. Number 1.. I can't believe you forgot you had one! Honestly i can sniff them out in my house lol there is not forgetting this end. And Number 2.. it sounds like it was a early sneaky test so hopefully youve not been down too much as I cant imagine the result would have meant much. How many days until otd?

Hi Daisy.. so lovely to read some positive feelings on here.. I have my fingers crossed for you. How many days past Iui are you now? Keep hold of this feeling that you have.. do not let your brain talk your body out of being excited and feeling happy. Im very hopeful for you 😊

And for me.. day 13 scan today.. 1 x follie at 21mm and 1 on the other side at 17mm. Had an extra day on the menopur this time and Im very happy with the results. They were a little small on the day 11 scan at 16mm so big follie has clearly scoffed the extra vial of menopur lol. Wish it had shared with the little one but never mind.

So trigger tomorrow at 10pm and treatment 2pm on Monday. Hopeful this time. Feel so much better that I have 2 and that big follie is well over the 18mm bench mark already xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, I'm good thanks, fingers crossed for you tomorrow, do keep us posted, IUI has such a lower success rate but it really helps give hope when you hear positive stories.. It sounds promising, are you testing tomorrow or waiting an extra day? Like Matilda said there's nothing wrong with being positive, it could all help. So I've just had the one cycle of IUI so far and I'll be starting my second in a few weeks. We've been trying for 2 years with no luck. We have a three year old already and had no problem conceiving first time around. All our tests came back good as well so it's a mystery why we can make another one. So because we are already blessed with one monkey we don't get any funding from the NHS. We wanted to try IUI first rather than leap into IVF due to the cost but also we don't feel like we're there yet with IVF. Hopefully we won't get to that point where we have to make that call. 🙏

Hi Matilda, we've missed you! So great to hear you've got two big fat juicy follicles ready to get down to some serious business 😂 so after Monday are you going away like you thought to take your mind off the 2WW? My last cycle was medicated and I had two follicles one at 1.8 and one at 1.9 

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend and I'm thinking positively for you all xxxxxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey,

Oohh they were very good follies then which is very positive for next time. I asked as I remember that somebody from the last thread was having natual IUI. Is it your next cycle that you are planning to start the next round? 

Yes well we are off work Wed Thurs and Fri this week anyway so we are looking at going away just for a night to the derby dales to do some walking and to stay in a posh hotel. We said we would try and do some really nice things together on our days off this coming week rather than going away as Im running out of AL lol and its only August! 

Hope you have a lovely weekend if you're off work xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Matilda - welcome back, we've missed you! Really glad to hear you have two amazing follicles! 21mm is fab - lets hope the magic egg is in there! And having a night away sounds like a lovely idea, just what you need to distract from this stuff   I'll be testing on Tuesday eek  

Hey Daisy - glad you're feeling positive - fingers are crossed for you! Are you on the progesterone pessaries? If not thats a really good sign that AF hasn't come - do let us know!!   

Hey Tracey - hope you're feeling okay, probably feels annoying having to wait around now, but hope you're keeping busy!

As for me, Ive realised that although I started very realistic about this process, due to my premature ovarian failure diagnosis and the poor rates of success generally for IUI, I have started to get swept along. Everyone told me it was a miracle that I had a follicle (ive had over 10 scans and my ovaries were always shrivelled/small with no follicles) and then I kept expecting it not to grow. My consultant said the chances of them actually doing the IUI was so low, but it just kept happening somehow like it was 'meant to be.' 

I started to believe the dream because it almost felt like 'fate' that I had a random scan on that day to find that random one in a million follicle which then did what it was supposed to do against all odds... So I think my early negative test was probably a good thing as it has brought me back to reality. I know that wishing hard enough won't make this work but I thought I'd protected myself from my emotions. Time will tell but Im trying to be more realistic again or I know OTD will break me  

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess, it's good to be level headed about it all but there's no harm in having hope... It's all we can do really. You're not too far away from testing now.   

Hi Matilda, sounds like a good plan for next week not only to keep busy but also to have some quality time together 💛 I'm currently cd11 and had a positive ovulation test so will be cracking on this weekend 🙄 lol and then yes AF comes we'll then start another IUI cycle in September medicated again and with the progesterone this time. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hi Jess

it's so hard, isn't it? I also tell myself that being positive and having hope keeps my stress level down and is healthier than worry, but then at the same time hope can so quickly lead to being overly optimistic. 
I am in this same limbo of trying to protect myself from heartache and getting too negative and then an hour later I am optimistic and hopeful and then suddenly the fear of a very deep fall comes.  

SO hard.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Phoenix, think you just captured how Im feeling in one! Its so very hard isn't it but Im glad that we have this space to vent these feelings and know that you guys get it. If only wishing was enough! How are you feeling otherwise?

Thanks Tracey, you're right, I think I just need to have hope in the long term but remain pragmatic for this attempt. Not going to stress out but just realise that it may not be my fairy tale happy ending! Good news about ovulation at last - hopefully that means things will be on track to start in 2 weeks!!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I am still in my waiting cycle and am tracking ovulation and temperature to keep me busy. I am now officially in the luteal phase so I am now waiting for cycle day 1 to start my cd3 testing and get ready for IUI #2 in September.

My emotions are all over the place. I am SO worried that this might have been the first of many miscarriages and that there might just be something wrong with me. Then again I am hopeful that the IUI in September will work, because how could I keep going if I didn't see a chance? 
If someone told me that at the end of all of this there would be a healthy baby (or two or three) it would be so much easier to endure the disappointment and heartache of everything that might still be in front of me.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Morning Ladies,

Matilda- great news about your follies! Will be thinking of you with trigger tonight and treatment on Monday. 

Tracey- will keep everything crossed for next iui for you. I made a similar decision, as self funding, to try iui's first.... but the costs still rack up pretty quickly don't they.

JJ J
I'm not on anything at all, it's a totally 'natural' cycle. Makes me laugh the fact that it's called natural as having someone shove something up you and prod around whilst shining light up there seems anything but natural!
Hang on in there.... we're all rooting for you.

Phoenix- Hello
You've captured exactly how I'm feeling too. Hope you are ok. Waiting is so tough.

As for me, Monday is my official test date. AF is due today but its not unusual for it to be a few days either side.  I had period type pain again yesterday and a headache which I thought was going to turn into my usual pre period migraine which it didn't, it's stayed a headache.  I cracked and tested at 1.30am this morning and it was negative. So I feel like I've plunged back to reality with a huge bang. I know it was early and I might test positive on Monday... I just doubt it now. Think today will just be spent miserably waiting for AF.
I've been away with friends and then family for 9 days, back alone today which in a way is nice because I can just curl up and block the world out but on the other hand there are no distractions to stop me dwelling on it xxx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Daisy sorry to hear you had a BFN but like me you tested early - theres still a chance so try not to give up just yet! Its good news that AF hasn't come yet even more so given that you're doing a natural cycle as theres no hormones artificially stopping it from coming. Made me laugh about the prodding and shining - you're totally right it doesn't feel natural at all   I don't know whether to laugh or cry that some people can just 'bd' and along comes baby whereas for us its a whole other world that to anyone outside of it must think is crazy 

Hey Phoenix, am feeling for you and totally get how you must be feeling but try to stay hopeful - remember it only takes one successful egg to get your miracle so lets just keep hoping that your next try will be the one. There will be heartache and disappointment to come I am sure, but one thing I do know is that every day, every disappointment, you are one step closer to getting what you dream of. We have to hold onto that or this process will break us. Sending you lots of hugs  

Love to everyone this weekend xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

AF started :-(

Daisy x


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)




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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Very sorry to hear about AF daisy 🙁 Please be really kind to yourself over the next few days and even if you don't feel like it try and do nice things to cheer yourself up a little. I think we ladies are far far to hard on ourselves sometimes when AF comes and we nees to try and be kinder. Bless you. I will be thinking about you today. 

Jess - bless you, it's a really thin line between being positive and protecting yourself.  People always say how we need to remain positive but I think sometimes that can lead to a lowering of the defences.. but they do say how important it is to keep in a positive mind frame and even to visualise your follicles growing, bursting and releasing the egg.. which cells then multiply and inplant. It is a constant battle but you need to keep the faith as this really is a miracle follie. And.. if things don't work out then you know its not necessarily impossible in the future like you first thought! Our bodies can really really be amazing at times so please dont count yourself out yet. 

Tracey - Very pleased to hear about you cracking on the old fashioned way 😉 lol. Hubby will be pleased! My husband had the cheek to send me a saucy text at work today.. dipping his toe in to see if he was going to get any action later 🤤 lol luckily for me he needs to stay away from me to build up his stores for treatment. Silly man!

Hi Phoenix.. hope your day is going well and hoping you feel a little better today.

AFM.. nothing new to report waiting to trigger at 10pm.. this time with the ovitrille pen as my clinic have ran out of pregnyl 😒 xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Oh Daisy Im so sorry    gentle hugs coming your way   Matilda is right, I know you're not going to feel like it at all, but  please try to take some time to be kind to yourself - we're prescribing ice cream/whatever comfort food you find yummy. Thinking of you lots. 

Hey Matilda - thanks for your very kind words, you're right but I think I did need that realism to sink in before test day - you never know but Im going to just keep busy and try not to start fantasising which I had started to do!
Exciting with trigger today - I used ovitrelle pen and didn't have any side effects. Had heard some people saying it felt cold due to being kept in the fridge but mine didn't! Make sure when you're injecting you keep the dial towards you as then you can see it says 0 when you finish and can be sure you have injected the whole dose. Good luck, loads and loads of it  

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Daisy I'm so sorry it's truly 💔 isn't it. Like Matilda said it's good to try and do something nice for yourself but I know you probably won't feel like it. Had you decided what you would do at this stage? Appreciate you may not have planned ahead, we don't we are just taking it one step at a time. For now tho, have a cry, a drink and lots of chocolate. 

Lol Matilda at the saucy text! Who says romance is dead! When my husband had to do his test sample ahead (to see if we could do IUI) I sent him a boob shot 🙈 felt like I was 19 again, he replied with "thank you" which made me laugh. 

Hope you're feeling OK today Jess and no AF symptoms so far? 

Take care everyone, especially you Daisy 💛💛 xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Tracey, Im doing okay and no AF symptoms, but not sure how much that means! I am on the progesterone pessaries which I have heard stop AF from coming - and also I wasn't exactly having regular periods before. I am on HRT patches and had just switched to a form which is meant to give a monthly bleed but my IUI was done on that first bleed! Im hoping its a good sign    but could just be my body being dumb    

Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Thanks for all of your supportive messages, it means a lot to have people out there that understand.

JJJ I'm glad the trigger went well. Holding out for your test day.

I don't really know what to do to be kind to myself. I've had the most unproductive day ever today but not really relaxing I just feel cross with myself that I wasted a day doing nothing.

Haven't really cried yet, a few tears keep finding their way out then I pull myself back together again. It's just cruelty that AF is the v v last last thing that you want then just when you can't feel any worse emotionally you get period pain and headaches.

I don't know what to do next. Def want to keep trying but so aware that I've spent so much just on 2 natural IUIs, all the extras add up so quickly. I don't know whether it's worth me trying a medicated IUI, not really sure what the benefit would be...as I do ovulate and my Amh levels ( not that I really know what that means) were good. 
Or whether to go on to ivf straight away. 
Would be grateful for any thoughts or advice.
I'm away on a family hol Wed to Wed so couldn't do a medicated IUI or IVF next month as I wouldnt be around for scans but I think I'd be back just in time for the insemination for a natural round. 

With ivf do they collect the egg/s and put the embryos back in on the same cycle or over 2 or more cycles? 

All your stories about Saucy Texts and pics of boobs sent to the speed room have made me smile. Thanks.

Nighty night

Daisy xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Oh Daisy my heart is with you tonight   Its just so horrible that not only does AF appear but it sticks around and makes you feel crap for a few days. 

I am by no means an expert but didn't want to read and run, its a difficult decision between IUI/IVF - have your hospital/clinic given you any indication what they advise? When you have done your 2 natural IUI's how many follicles have you produced and what size, and how was your lining? I feel in your position I would be reluctant to do another natural IUI. But whether to take the leap to IVF straight away might be a jump. Possibly having a medicated IUI may allow bigger/more follicles as well as potentially a better lining/longer luteal phase if you are given the progesterone pessaries. I know often clinics will encourage 3 IUI's before resorting to IVF. 

I know not being able to do it next month due to your family holiday would be frustrating but one more month here and there won't make a difference and its important to make the right decision for you - its such a big thing emotionally and financially. And maybe the holiday will do you some good even as just a little distraction to de-stress you before you go full steam ahead with whichever plan you choose to take.

Sleep on things, you don't need to decide straight away, sending you lots of love xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Thanks.
I have no idea about numbers of follicles, size and lining etc as I didn't have any scans. With natural you just do urine ovulation tests then an insemination.

I had to have an initial internal scan the month before I started the process which showed I was producing eggs ( are follicles eggs I'm so confused ) 

Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ohh Im sorry shows how clueless I am! I thought natural just meant you didn't take the medication but still had scans! Producing eggs is a good thing - follicles are like the precursor to eggs. 

Im sure you can get a better explanation but this is what I understand of it all - In a normal cycle you produce only one follicle and only one egg, which you then ovulate. When you take the medication, the point is to try and create more than just one follicle (and therefore more than just one egg). Some people still ovulate naturally but a lot of people are given an ovulation/trigger shot which makes all the follicles release an egg rather than just the one like in a normal period cycle. If you have too many theres a risk of multiples (they cancel if you have over a certain number). At this stage, in IVF the eggs get extracted from your body called egg collection. 

However, not all follicles contain an egg, and theres still a chance the sperm won't fertilise the egg - insemination at least makes them be in the right place though. In your case, Im thinking being medicated would mean that you would produce more follicles. The hormones also make the follicles grow which they might not be doing so well on their own so they may be bigger - they have to reach 18mm in order to be most likely to contain an egg. I think the advantage is that scans will allow your clinic to see whats going on better - hopefully to give you a better chance of success and definitely to know if theres something that they can do to intervene with what isn't quite right (e.g. if lining isn't thick enough etc).

Hope this makes some slight sense, hopefully they will explain it to you better xxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Morning lovely ladies, 

Daisy I completely get how you're feeling with the IUI VS IVF battle. You just think IUI is so much cheaper but once you have had a few go's you're well on your way to pay for one round of IVF. Is the cost different when do natural IUI? Our medicated cycles cost £975 I think. I'm not sure I'm much help as I'm still on the fence myself but I think the reason it can be hard to for it is because even tho the success rate for IVF is so much higher than IUI, it's still not guaranteed. I'm not at the point yet where I feel like I can gamble my money on those odds. But then I think is there anything else in the world that I could spend that money on that would make me as happy. I feel like IVF is the last resort too so if that doesn't work then it's over but I know some people do IVF and if that doesn't work then go on to try IUI. I know some clinics also offer a refund of up to 100% if it doesn't work. Have you had conversations about IVF about your chances? If you don't mind me asking are there any problems or is your case unexplained? I know at our local clinics (we've been doing iui at the hospital so not been to one yet) they do open evenings where you go can for some free advice as I think the initial appointment can be £200. So in a long winded way like Jess said it might be work having a conversation about what the hospital or clinic would recommend. I know you're clock watching and wanting to crack on with a decision but it might be good to take a cycle or two out to think things through when feelings have settled down as it can be so easy to jump on the wagon again but as I'm in the same position with the money aspect you have to be a bit more cautious. The NHS don't offer (if they are funding) any more than three go's of IUI but a medicated round might help. I guess that way you'll know you've given it as best as shot by trying the medicated way? My nurse said a helping hand could be all you need but the bitter side of that is we had medicated and I had two follicles but it didn't work (but I am trying again with the progesterone as I feel that was the missing link - if that doesn't work for us we'll be in the same position as you). I think a family holiday and some time out may be want you need to. You can't help watching the clock tho, I'm 34 next month and feel practically geriatric 😂

Anyway sorry to waffle was just typing as I was thinking so not sure if it's even any help! Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Morning Ladies,

Hi Jess - I didn't find the ovitrille cold either, zero pain. I just hate the bloomin menopur, it literally always brings tears to my eyes because of the sting, its awful. Its not the syringe just the account contents burning its way through my fat supplies on my thigh lol. Thankfully no more injections now for a couple of weeks if not longer 🙏🏼
Im counting down to Otd for you.. we are slowly getting there.. feels like a very long 2 weeks though even for me eagerly awaiting the result on here 🤗

Hi Tracey - lol at your hubbys "thank you" what are they like aye! They are funny creatures.. there brains work so differently to ours.. really tickles me sometimes how Im at work busily going about my day, stressed to high heaven and running round like a headless chicken and hubby who does the same job elsewhere finds the time to sit there sending saucy texts lol. Silly men.. clearly we are far to alluring 😉😆

Hi Daisy, if you brain and body wanted to sit around, mope and concern some energy yesterday then do not feel bad about that. You probally needed a bit of time to yourself just doing nothing. 

And there is nothing wrong with shedding them tears.. at the end of the day you are extremely disappointed and we all have to grieve every month to a point for what could have been. You might feel really crap at the time for having a sob but youll feel better the next day when your not still forcing yourself to swollow back tears. We are all entitled to feel sad and cry.. its normal and its not a bad thing. 

I too ovulate every month however if you have a little look online and speak with your hospital, medicated iuis have a better success rate. I echo the ladies re larger and more follicles and the fact they can moniyor your lining. 

However the cost of IUI i imagine mounts up very fast. We were told that our medicated IUIs gave us the chance of success as 10 - 12% where as Ivf would be 50-55%.  I am personally counting down my funded IUIs with the intention of getting to IVF where the odds are in my favour. I like to deal with what I can see and I like to make factual based decisions.

I think after alot of deliberating you just know whats best for you personally and what feels right for where you are on your journey.

I really echo what Jess and Tracey have said to you though xx

With IVF they collect and transfer the embryos back in on the same cycle unless there is a medical reason not to. If that is the case they usually freeze them and then thaw and transfer them the next cycle.

AFM.. triggered last night. What is really odd is that last cycle I had zero cm, fertile or otherwise. Where as this cycle I'm getting ewcm at the minute which I am pleased about as I feel like my body is more physically ready for this IUI as it has clearly registered I am near ovulation.  Has anybody else encountered this on the meds? X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Morning Ladies

Thanks so much for all of your thoughts and telling me about your experiences.
I have no known fertility issues, but I'm a single Woman so I'm reliant on donor sperm. Also I'm 38, almost 39 so I feel like time is running out and every month counts.  I now realise I waited too long just hoping to fall in love get married and have a perfect 'normal' family before I realised that I'd far far rather do my best at being a Mum on my own than never get to be a Mum at all.

Not all hospitals/clinics will treat single women so my options are limited.  I think I've ended up at a pretty expensive clinic .. £995 for a natural ( no scans no medication) iui and roughly £1600 for a medicated one. But I don't even know whether or not this includes whatever you use afterwards to lengthen the luteral phase... it probably doesn't.
I had a consultation with a consultant before any treatment but I didn't know anything about anything then so I didn't know what questions to ask.... I have LoADS now.
I had a 9 min phone consultation (£65) after my first IUI to discuss whether or not to move to a medicated one, but all I really got from that was that it would involve 3 or 4 scans within a short period and that it would increase my chance from 14 to 18 percent.
It takes me 2 and a half hours door to door to get to the clinic, ( and the trAvel is expensive) so effectively that would mean 4 full or almost full days off work.  My boss has been understanding so far, but I'm not sure how far this will stretch. I also opted not to tell my fairly young team. My team has changed a bit for when I go back, I still don't really want to tell them but I'm going to have to say something if I'm off for 4 days and I'm an emotional wreck from the drugs. 
Aggghhh too much to think about.
Xxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Daisy

I had a natural IUI, but got scans and a trigger shot. Timing of the IUI is essential with frozen/ thawed sperm, because the egg cell only lives 24 hours after ovulation and the sperm for about 12 hours. So you really only have a window of 12 hours when both are alive.

I can't imagine doing an IUI just based on ovulation tests, because I am never sure when I ovulate after the LH surge. Based on my temperature I probably ovulate the day of the surge. 
With scans you can do one on cycle day 10 or 11 and depending on the size of the follicle you do another one a few days later. With my first IUI I had a scan on cycle day 11 and had one 15 mm follicle and one 13 mm follicle. I went back on cycle day 14 and had one at 19 mm and one at 15 mm. Follicle should be between 18 and 22 mm before triggering, so I got the trigger shot on cycle day 14 late that evening. Insemination was 26 hours after trigger and I felt myself ovulate 5 hours before IUI. So the timing was perfect and it was also successful (even if only for a week). 

So maybe check with your clinic how much they want for just the scans. If the timing is off, it's basically a waste of money. I don't think I would ever do an IUI without scans and trigger, because the timing is so difficult to get right without.


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi all  sorry I have been quiet I can't believe i am actually writing this but I had BFP this morning!! So when I thought my period was here that one day it was abit light for my normal period but didn t think anything of it thought it may of been meds etc ... but the next day it stopped and didn't want to say anything as kept feeling it was going to come again but must of been implantation  only thing I can think of so we decided to just do a test and there it was a blue cross  can't believe it!! Xxx

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

First of all a huge congratulations Jane! Fantastic news to have one success in our group, it does give us hope   so happy for you, you must be ecstatic especially with that trick of an AF! Now time to take care of your little embie. Can I ask how many IUI's had you had or was it a magic first one?

Hi Matilda - glad trigger shot went well. I too had a fair bit of cm but don't really know what that means lol. It was slightly fragrant (TMI!) not a bad smell at all just like wafted when changing etc. When does your IUI take place again? Lots and lots of luck, fingers are crossed!  

Hey Daisy - please don't beat yourself up for not knowing and not asking questions - we have all been there! I was very clueless and there were a lot of things that afterwards I wished I had asked but we aren't born knowing this stuff. Its through gathering information on here (and unfortunately through the unsuccessful tries) that we get clued up. It might feel like you're too old etc but just hold onto that dream that you will be a mum - no matter what it takes. People start a lot older than you!

Hope you're doing ok Phoenix, I never knew that thawed sperm lives that much less time but I suppose its logical, just hadn't really thought about it. I know some clinics do a blood test for ovulation - for me I was using ovulation test kits but was told to stop when they did trigger shot. I now wish I had continued to make sure that I did actually ovulate and that it happened at the right time. Oh well, too late now!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Jess,

it wouldn't have told you anything to continue testing after trigger, because the HCG of the trigger shot is so similar to the LH that is measured by ovulation sticks that it will definitely show a positive just because of the trigger. I did one ovulation test and one pregnancy test (for HCG) the morning after trigger, because I wanted to be sure that HCG made its way from my tummy fat into my system.  

I am doing ok, but somehow keep having really bad, teary moments. I normally don't cry at all, but this miscarriage thing is hitting me hard. I think it might be because of the hormones. The progesterone and HCG crash right after miscarrying was bad and now I am in my luteal phase and progesterone is rising again. Maybe that's why... will have to do some research on this. 

What's also really stressing me out is that my next IUI might be on the same day as my brothers wedding. I can't imagine having to happily  smile through the whole thing while knowing that I'm missing my chance. But I also don't know if it would be a big blow up if I decided to take my chance and take the day trip to Denmark. I just hope my follicle is really one day before or one day after the wedding.   I am literally crying at the thought of missing September too. 
I realise that I must seem like a very sad person to you. I am actually not like that. I just have too much time to think right now.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Phoenix, ah yes that makes sense, all so complicated this hormone stuff isn't it  

Its totally understandable that your miscarriage is still affecting you and you don't seem like a sad person at all just a normal, human one! It isn't the kind of thing that you can just shelf straight away and you've had so much to deal with within a really short time so its normal to have teary moments, try not to beat yourself up  

In terms of your next IUI, I know once you start this journey you feel like every month is a 'wasted month' but you are very young and have lots and lots of time so its not going to make any difference here or there waiting until the following month. Maybe Im remembering wrongly (forgive me if so) but I think you are using donor sperm rather than having a known fertility problem? In which case you definitely should try not to think of it as missing your chance by being at your brothers wedding because that chance will be there the next month!   I think if it were me, I wouldn't want to risk it that time round - knowing how crucial timing is etc and risk forking out all that money for nothing

Sending you a big hug xx


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## Jane88 (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi JJJ it is my first cycle I keep freaking out though that it's not true still false or it's miscarriage don't know just all these things going through my head  how are you feeling? When are you due to test? Xx

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Congratulations Jane! That's amazing news! I always think implantation bleeding is a myth (because it's always my period!) but also how much of a boost to hear that you succeed on the first go! Will you have a scan this week then to check how many there are (didn't you have two follicles?). Really happy for you 😊

Good luck for tomorrow Matilda, it's great to hear you in control and positive about it all... It all helps. I don't recall any cm from my go I'm afraid. 

Jess have you had any other symptoms? Tuesday is your testing day right? 

Daisy I can't believe how hard it is to get treatment on your own. The costs are crazy too... I can see why it's such a tough decision. Have you spoken to through with any of your family? Although I know it's hard as if they haven't been through your situation it's difficult for them to give sound advice. It's hard with time off work too, if I was looking at £1600 for medicated IUI I think I would be leaning more towards IVF given the difference in success rate but it's easy  to say that when I'm not in your situation. 

Sorry to hear you're feeling low Phoenix. Do your family know your situation? I know every month counts but maybe a month out to enjoy yourself (do we do that whilst constantly thinking about wanting a baby?!) would be a good stress reliever for you. I know it's hard to think you've wasted a month though. 

As for me, I had a positive ovulation test on Fri and I felt cramps over the weekend which I've never noticed before when I ovulate so if anything after my iui cycle I feel a bit more in tune to my body. So we've done what we need to do for this back to basics cycle and if AF comes in two weeks we'll start our second cycle. My husband did just say to me, do we need to do the do tonight. I said no we don't need to. He was like yes but do you want it. I replied, no I don't. 🙈 I wonder if we'll ever enjoy the business again 😂 xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Also, I just wanted to say as there are a few of you ladies on here who are doing it solo and I think you're amazing 💪. I'm just so frustrated for you that the "system" seems to add even more barriers in your way. Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Jane- how exciting, I'm so pleased for you and for everyone that we have the hope that it can work.  Will keep everything crossed that he stays in there and develops perfectly.

Thank you Phoenix, I'm going to ask my clinic if they do a natural iui with scans and a trigger.  Phoenix hate tpvthink of you being so tearful. Big big hug.  Very Tough with the dates and the wedding.  Do your family know about the treatment? Could you talk to your brother about it or not? My friend was giving me advice before in an odd way. She was basically saying two opposite things and making me think about my reaction to both as a way to guide me to what deep down I want to do. So I'm going to say two opposite things to you to think about, one will probably resonate with you as wrong and one right;
I think you should go to the wedfing, he is your brother after all and it's the most important day of his life.  It will be tough but there are 12 more times in a year you can do this iui, his wedding is a once in a lifetime thing.
Or
I think you should explain to your brother that you love him but why it's so imperative that you do the iui which could potentially fall on his wedding day.  He loves you, so he'll understand how important this is.

How will you actually know if the follicle is ready btw are you having scans here but treatment in Denmark?

Matilda - good luck tomorrow.

Thanks JJJ I will try to keep holding onto the dream.  I am certainly finding out more on here than from the clinic. It's stressful though that I/we have found this new group of supportive forum friends but then this month's forum will close and we may not ever find each other again. 
How are you feeling about your test date getting closer?

Thanks Tracey, I think it's good to all be supporting each other regardless of our circumstances. There is a solo wanna be Mum forum but this is by far where I've found the most people to chat to and support.

I'm erring towards missing this month ( which actually is 13 days) and waiting the 25 days or whatever it is so I will be on the country to do either a natural iui but with scans and a trigger, or a medicated iui.  However I may have changed my mind by tomorrow ( or in half an hour! )

Love Daisy xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Thanks so much for your input ladies! Yes, my family knows about my baby plans and some of my family know about the possible collision with the wedding. The brother whose weeding it is doesn't know because I don't want to add to their pre-wedding preparation stress with something that might not even happen.. I will only really know the exact date 36 hours before. Some of my family say that they would go ahead with IUI, because if it falls on this day it is not something I planned or could control in any way and sometimes that's just how it is. Others say it is a special day and to just sit that one month out because it might take me years to conceive and this one month won't make a difference in the long run.
I guess I will just have to wait and see how this cycle turns out.

I am having my scans in Germany and will report the follicle sizes to the clinic in Denmark. They then tell me when to trigger and when to be there.  

Matilda: Good luck for tomorrow!
Jane: Congratulations! Be positive, stop worrying and enjoy being pregnant!!  
Tracey: Our cycle seems identical  
Jess: Hope AF symptoms stay away!!!
Daisy: That test is really good. Will think about the two things some more.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Just thought I'd share my emotional state with you lovely ladies before bed. Since AF started yest I've constantly felt like I'm holding back the tears but I haven't/ can't cry ( except a few tears at DIY SOS) This morning I was with people who knew, who understood and who've even been through years of fertility treatment so I really think they'd have been fine if I'd cried but despite holding back tears minutes before I just went kind of numb. Hard to explain. Feel like I need to cry and I'd feel better if I could just let it out, but somehow I can't.
That is all. 
Nighty night xxxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Daisy

I totally know the feeling (not from this mc experience though; constantly fighting tears now). But I had that problem when I was still at university and was under a lot of pressure. I had the exact same feeling you describe.
I always had that one movie (My sisters keeper) that I would watch in those situations because it is so sad that it opened the flood gates and I could just let everything out. I always felt so much better after that. Maybe that could help you too?!


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey to you all before I head to sleep, I feel that our little group is especially heavy-hearted tonight, yet at the same time it feels like we do have a connection to each other by nature of going through this horrible journey at a similar time. I have no friends in this situation, no family, and whilst those who know have tried to understand, they cannot and I do not blame them. Id just like to thank you guys for being a constant at such an uncertain time, somewhere to question those things that don't really seem valid enough to tell anyone else. I wish for us all positive results but I know that we will all get there, in our own time. Every time we fail, every time it doesn't work, we take one step closer to meeting our little ones. A painful step, but a step nonetheless. And I hope that gives those of you feeling the worst of it some comfort in some small way   

Daisy - don't beat yourself up for not being able to cry how you think you should, the tears will come but maybe you are not ready to let the flood gates open just yet. When you are, let them flow, grieve, because you need it. That pain is not going to go away but hopefully it will lessen and you will feel ready to go onto the next stage. Lots of hugs for you 

Phoenix - sending you hugs tonight too. Im sorry you're feeling so sad  Im a little confused by your clinic will they make you pay even if you don't have the treatment because you have your scans in a different country? I really hope not. It sounds dreadfully unfair   here we decide in advance whether we are doing it in that month and if not we just don't have the scans as even they add up. I hate how expensive it all is   take some time to think about things and to decide what is best for you - it always helps to have a bit of a sleep on big decisions  

Matilda - best of luck! Everything is crossed, you sound positive which can only help - lots of positive vibes headed your way  

Jane - you got your BFP and thats all you need to know! It's definitely real so now its time to look after yourself and your plus one! I do remember you saying there was a chance of multiples so who knows maybe it could be plus two   don't worry we won't ask you to share one   

Tracey - being more in tune with your bod is definitely useful, just knowing this process, the questions to ask etc, it can only help! I laughed at your convo with hubby   Then I laughed again because for me I know theres no chance I will ever fall pregnant bding. The two have become very separate entities... For me a baby is always going to come from donors and test tubes and prods and pokes, but weirdly Im ok with that now!

As for me, today I went to a food market and the smells made me feel sick. Probably nothing as I hadn't had much for breakfast but for a second I wondered... I don't feel anything else though and I am almost certain it hasn't worked. Test day only two days away so I guess soon I will know for sure. Boy am I glad its not three weeks.

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Jess, that sounds promising. Slight nausea and sensitivity to smells were some of the first symptoms before my BFP!!
I am also surprised by how valuable this little group has become to me in just a few days. It's really hard to find people who can understand our situation or can handle hearing about it so much. On the contrary, here I feel there's not just people who can handle reading it, but kind of also benefit from reading about other peoples struggles, hopes, successes etc. At least, it's that way for me.

I have a very nice doctor here in Germany who is willing to do the scans so I can time the trigger and IUI perfectly. As a single woman using donor sperm I can't have the IUI in Germany, because of legal reasons: in Germany I can sue the person who *caused* the pregnancy for child support; that can be the partner as the biological father or the doctor who performed an IUI. Most doctors won't even do follicle scans or any of the necessary examinations (HIV, Hepatitis etc.) for fear that a court might see this as help for causing pregnancy. 
The funny thing is that I am doing this thing on my own precisely because I can't imagine being in a long-term partnership and having someone there who can question or challenge every decision I am making for myself or my children. So the last thing I would do is suing anyone for child support. 
So I am starting my cycle sometime this week, will go for CD3 and CD11 scans with my German doctor and pay those scans privately (about €80 = £73). I will then call my clinic in Denmark and tell them follicle number, follicle size and height of endometrial lining and they will then give me the go-ahead with a time and date for trigger and IUI. I already got the prescription for the trigger from the clinic in Denmark and it's waiting in my fridge; that ovitrelle pen cost me €50 = £45. I will book my flight only at the time of the go-ahead from Denmark which is around 48 hours before IUI. The flight will cost up to €500 = £456 and I will pay the clinic in Denmark the evening before IUI which is €470 = £429. So the only thing I am paying without knowing if I am even having the IUI that month are the scans at £73. Everything else is only paid after I know that I will definitely go ahead with everything. 
I think that's a very good route to take, because the scans tell me a number of things about my chances of success and can show if I should maybe skip that month and save the large amount of money if something is not right. So I happily invest that money every month  I hope that explanation isn't too long and confusing.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi Phoenix, not at all that makes perfect sense! I don't have the exact prices for my clinic yet (dreading the bill arriving! Im a student and have been working all summer and scrimping to get enough put aside) but I have a price list from a similar one (both are in NHS hospitals but Im self-funding) and its £200 per scan. I had to have 6 scans as my follicle was growing so slowly so Im estimating it could be up to £1200 just on scans without even including the IUI process which is why I was concerned but it sounds like you have a much better system and have it all worked out  

I can't believe how difficult it is for you as a single person in Germany though! I find that so surprising - Im also doing this alone for various reasons but its no where near as challenging here. Im so glad you have a good doctor who understands and is willing to take some of the strain off. 

Hope you're feeling okay today and that AF will start soon so you can get going!

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Jess I think it's crazy (and unfair) how the costs seem to differ across the UK. We've done our treatment through an NHS hospital and it was just one lump sum of £975. I know it's not worth getting frustrated over things you can change and "it is what it is" but it does seem unreasonable that the prices should differ. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Jess, £200 per scan is unbelievable. What do they do during that scan? Mine takes about 3-5 min and they only look at endometrial lining, follicle numbers and they measure each follicle. That's it. Is there anything else they are doing for that huge amount of money And this times 6


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Wow Tracey really?! Do you mind me asking is your clinic in London? I wonder if thats why mine is more expensive? As I say I haven't received the final bill yet, (I was under two clinics due to my hormone problems but chose this one for my assisted conception) so now Im really hoping mine will be more like yours and less like the price list I was quoted from the other London based clinic haha!

Phoenix no you're absolutely right - takes all of a few minutes and they do exactly what you said, nothing extra. I had a scan on day 5 of my period when they found a follicle then one a week later but it had only grown 2mm in the first 7 days. After that I had scans every other day - I have premature ovarian failure so they weren't expecting anything to work and I guess mine was growing much more slowly. They kept saying it will probably be ready in two days, lets scan again then - boy was I relieved when it finally hit 18mm on scan 6 as I felt like I was sending money down the drain!

Wishing everyone a good day today, I've been super lazy and had a much need lie in but haven't been sleeping too well the last few days with dreaded OTD.

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess no I'm not based in London so maybe that's why but I still would have thought through the NHS there should be consistencies but clearly not. I knoe some NHS hospitals do IVF where you can self fund which is a bit cheaper then going to a private clinic but not all hospitals offer it (mine doesn't) xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah ok hmm I am going to have to find out haha, maybe I overestimated which would be great  

How is everyone feeling tonight? Im nervous for tomorrow, but also feeling quite emotional and tearful. I have come in full circle and now feel quite sure that it will be negative  

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Jess, stop worrying! Think about your stress hormones   But I know how you feel. I think earlier you said that you're not sleeping too well. I haven't slept well from the day of the IUI until the blood tests that clearly showed a miscarriage. I was on progesterone suppositories and expected to sleep really well, but for me the whole (very short) pregnancy was basically 3 weeks of insomnia   I was just worrying all the time, first about getting a BFP and then about the bleeding/ spotting.   
But really, stop worrying and enjoy the last night of the unknown and hope, and then be sad and annoyed and angry tomorrow if it is indeed negative.

I am better today and just impatiently waiting for AF. It is still way too early as I am only on my 7th day post-ovulation, but I read somewhere (sadly could not find the original publication) that HCG during the first half of the cycle can shorten the luteal phase due to progesterone deficiencies. So I am very much hoping for that since short luteal phase means early AF, which means earlier ovulation next cycle, which means IUI before wedding.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Phoenix, you're completely right   and stressing isn't going to change anything at this stage! Im sorry you had insomnia all the way through, I think I would be the same - At least until each step was okay with scans etc. Even when I had my tiny follicle I felt somehow protective of it - I've never had a follicle before since my chemo and even though it was less than 1cm I was thinking about it like all the time  

I am glad you're feeling better today (I say 'better' for want of an alternative word as I know it isn't better, all okay again!) but I get what you mean. Lets hope things just speed up and AF comes so you can get a move on. I know its hard and Im being a complete hypocrite right now as Ive been reading stuff during TWW (!) but try to keep your mind busy and on other things than just becoming a fertility expert (which Im sure we all will be by the end of this crappy journey!) so you're not stressing etc. 

I don't know if it does make a difference but I have a story for you/the group! Feeling philosophical tonight! 

When I was diagnosed with POF, my FSH was 130. I spent a year taking loads of supplements, eating like a healthy rabbit, doing those horrible green shots etc, watching babies everywhere, crying a lot. I researched everything. And my FSH a year later had only increased to 150. I was miserable. My scans showed both my ovaries were small and shrivelled, I had no follicles at all. I finally accepted what all the doctors told me - that I would never get pregnant with my own eggs and the chances of me ever having a follicle was only slightly higher than 0%. They said they would try 2 IUI's to see if I had any response but it was just to prove to me that I wouldn't. IVF was not even an option. I went on with life - I couldn't carry out the IUIs straight away as I was in uni so I was waiting for the summer. I stopped all the supplements there didn't seem much point. I mourned but I prepared myself for the fact that my baby would come through egg donation, and I came to accept that. 

In the meantime, I made some changes in my life. Split up with a life partner, changed career paths. I still longed for a baby but I started to feel happy. Then I had a period. Then another. Then another (3 in 6 weeks). I hadnt had periods since I was on chemo. I still knew it didn't mean I was better. My FSH was still no better and my oestrogen was so low they doubled the dose because it had given me osteoporosis already. 

Then the summer came. I had the medications already and the sperm waiting in the freezer so I might as well try the IUI, right? Well a mix up with appointments meant I went for a scan on the wrong day in the wrong month. And there it was - a follicle. When I had given up, when I had stopped stressing and dedicating my life to curing myself, this miracle had happened. I know my chances are so very low and that tomorrow probably will confirm what the doctors always thought but its presence was a medical miracle given my hormone levels. And it came at a point when I was totally stress-free. The doctors deny this has anything to do with it - they say if stress was linked to my FSH levels they would be lower than normal not high, but the proof is in the scan! 

So I guess what Im trying to say is don't give up, and don't send yourself crazy - you've got this and it will happen when it happens which I just know it will   I hope no one takes this the wrong way I am just as guilty at wanting to know everything but I think sometimes when we step back it can help!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I admire you so much for your strength! And yes, that story has so much truth in it. I was a biochemist before I changed careers for a more stable job to support my baby plans and hopefully future family, so I also research a lot of the biochemical stuff and interplay of hormones. I was very stressed during my 2WW and during my brief pregnancy and I am not fully convinced that this didn't play a role. Most research says no, but I don't know. 

I actually thought about starting up some sports program again, because sports mean endorphins and endorphins lower stress level and just make you happy. Maybe I'm starting tomorrow. Just a little though, because I think starting something you didn't do before ttc is not good.

So again, you're awesome and whatever tomorrow brings there will be a way forward. You have already influenced your body so much through researching and being positive and eating well. We'll get there!


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Aw thank you Phoenix, thats very sweet of you but I don't feel very strong hehe. I think we all are just doing our best! I really really don't think stress will have been the reason that your pregnancy didn't stick so please don't blame yourself - stressing once your pregnant must be totally normal and especially amongst people who've had to use assisted conception in order to do so - this definitely was not your fault, just sadly it wasn't your time this time. Less stress before the process, but once we're on there a little stress is probably healthy! 

A sports programme sounds like a good idea - nothing crazy though for sure  thank you again for your very kind words <3

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Thanks for sharing your stories last night Jess and phoenix, you gave me goosebumps 💛 hoping everyone is feeling good today and I'm crossing my fingers ever so tightly for you today Jess 🙏🙏🙏🙏 xxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Good Morning Ladies...

So much too catch up on..

First of all Congratulations Jane.. lovely news ans it is really nice to read something positive on this forum. Hopefully gives us all a little boost to know that there really is a real chance of success. Take care of yourself and best of luck in the future 

Morning Phoenix.. have you worked your way to making any decisions about your next IUI? I can completely emphasise as to why you are so torn. It's really difficult as it is obviously a very important family day but in the back of my mind I would be thinking about how a person's fertility is statistically increased straight a pregnancy. Bless you.. you will make the right decision in time.

I also love the scenerios Daisy gave! What a clever friend you have... I might steal your trick when my buddys are at a cross roads in the future.


Morning Tracey..

Oohh Ovulating over the weekend 😁 Fabulous news. You will probally be about 2 daya in front of me which is nice! We can help keep eachother sane as I always lose the plot during the second week like a mad lady 😈👿

Hi Daisy.. How are you feeling now? I hope you're feeling a little more yourself today. So sad to read peoples posts when you are at your lowest.. Going on from what Phoenix said.. I watched "Me before you" the other night.. it was brilliant and right blubber fest if you feel like you still need to let it out. I was on the Menopur which makes me very weepy so needless to say my cushion was wet my the end of the film!

Morning lovely Jess.. been thinking about you a lot. My fingers are so firmly crossed for you. Every time I read your posts about your journey it just feels like this cycle is meant to be. Any news? Sending huge amounts of positive vibes as you really really deserve a positive result. 

AFM.. had my IUI yesterday.. apparently my cervix was hiding 🤔 which I have never had before but she found it in the end. No spotting or bleeding this time which is ace. The nurse was lovely as well which I was so thankful for as some of them have been 🐄's. 

Hubbys post wash sperm was 40 million.. so they were very happy with that. I felt really bruised and bloated yesterday but feel a lot better this morning.. just lightly sore to my uterus. I had terrible stabbing cramps yeaterday about 3 hours after Iui on my left side so hoping that was ovulation. Staying positive.. i feel so so much better about this cycle 🤞🏻🤞🏻 xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

I thought no one had posted for two days, turns out loads of you have but for some reason I've stopped getting e mail alerts to tell me.
Logged in to check on JJJ but no news yet..
Just a short msg as recovering from a migraine and head pounding
Lots of love you everyone xxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey everyone!

Again, so happy this board is so active!!  

Jess, thinking of you this morning. 

Matilda, I kind of made my decision, which is to go if ovulation happens to fall on that day. Yes, I also read about that increased fertility after a miscarriage and that's one reason I was so disappointed about having to sit my August cycle out. I did have very intense ovulation symptoms that I normally don't have like that - sorry if TMI: everything regarding cm, breast tenderness etc. So, I would have really liked to use this cycle, but understand that my lining might not have been ideal for a new pregnancy... but I would have liked to check that. We do have the possibility to just do a scan, but my clinic was firm on their rule.  
But yes, so that's one reason for not wanting to waste September. Another reason is that I am doing this with donor sperm and I never know how long this donor is available. I have one sperm sample in storage for September, but I would like to buy more for a sibling as soon as I have a real, solid pregnancy. The donor went close to 0 straws twice this year but always filled back up soon. But I am worried that he might stop donating at some point, so that's another reason why I don't want to drag it out longer. Also, I might have to sit October out, because I have a very important exam that determines my income and gives me a 30% salary increase if I take it in October, so I can definitely not skip that if ovulation falls on that exam date. And that would take me right to November, if I skipped both September and October. 
So, many things come together for that decision, but I still hope that it just doesn't fall on that day.   A few days before that would be awesome though since then I will already PUPO on the wedding day, have my sweet little secret and be in the happy unknown.   

Matilda, symptoms after IUI are great. Last time I felt pregnant basically immediately and enjoyed every twinge and every ache. Enjoy the next few weeks!! Are you on progesterone and did you trigger ovulation? I think those hormones totally contributed to my pregnancy feeling. Can't wait to be on the hormones again. Even though I couldn't sleep feeling pregnant was awesome   

Daisy, hope you get well soon. Headaches are terrible.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

THanks P.

Head still bad, shouldn't be on screen.

But JJJ where are you?  Thinking about you so much.  MUch love,hope you are OK.

DAisy xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey guys, thanks for checking in on me. BFN. I couldn't sleep last night so ended up doing it at about 2am.

Deep down, I was probably expecting it but that doesn't make it any easier. I had started to wonder and there were a few slight symptoms but I guess it was just the progesterone.

I have a beta test to be doubly sure before I switch back to my usual form of patches and stop the pessaries but I know the result will confirm what I already know. I almost don't want to be bothered to have it done but I suppose I might as well. 

Im going to read everyone else's news later if that's okay but hope you all are doing ok. Tonight I will be tucking someone else's little one in and mourning the fact that won't be me. The tears are flowing but I will try to reign it in so that I don't look like a blobby mess at work tonight.

Love to all
Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

So sorry, Jess.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

So so sorry Jess. Sending Big virtual hug.

Daisy xxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Jess I'm truly 💔 for you. Take care of yourself   and allow the time to feel rotten. This whole process makes us so much more resilient and you'll feel better and stronger in a few days. Much love to you xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Oh Jess.. bless you. I'm so sorry to hear the news. Take time to look after yourself and only do things over the next couple of days that you really want to do. Thoughts are with you.. did you use a first reponse? Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thank you everyone, your kind words really mean a lot <3 only a couple of people knew I was doing this and they were very overly optimistic about it working so I almost don't want to tell them   

I have work booked for tonight and tomorrow all day as I wanted to keep busy. Thats probably a good thing as I know I will be a mess otherwise! I work in childcare during the holidays though so its somewhat bitter sweet - I do love the work but today it serves as a reminder how easy it is for everyone else!

Matilda it was a clear blue digital so think they're pretty accurate. I did wonder about it not being first urine of the day but thats just me wishing it was another result  

I will be okay! I knew this was going to be a journey and this is an unfortunate step but Im not giving up! How is everyone else doing today?

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess.. When is your Beta? Was it your 14th day today? I'm glad to hear that you have lots on seems as you wanted to keep busy.. what is your plan now? Did I read previously that you would need to go in for another scan? You've had 1 follicle now.. there is nothing to say that another one will not appear in time or that it could even be bubbling away at the minute. Our bodies are absolutely amazing Jess and I hope you can try and keep the fact that you have had a follicle at the forefront of your mind. You have defied all odds! Is the blood test simply a beta? If your not on progesterone they couls check your levels to confirm that your follicle actually containef an egg which was released. Im sorry I cant remember if you're in the progesterone.. theres been so much talk of them lately!

Im really swollen, sore and uncomfortable today. Better than yesterday but I cant get my trousers done up and its making me feel a little blue. I'm at work and having to cover my button and zip with my blouse and cardy . 😝 Im not winning any fashion awards today! Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Wow Matilda is that a side effect from that meds or insemination? Maybe it's a sneak peak of a swollen tummy soon to come! 🙏 glad the procedure went OK for you tho and it wasn't too uncomfortable. It felt a bit like a one night stand for me when the nurse just left me lying on the bed for ten mins. I didn't know whether to be breezy and like "I'll call you?!" are you going away for a few days now then to help distract the 2ww? 

Jess you have been on my mind all day lovely. I was rooting for you so much and after the journey you've been through and I don't know, it did seem like fate with your little miracle follicle. Like Matilda said you had one follicle who's to say there aren't more just hiding and waiting to surprise you. I'm a bit unsure how it works with your cycles in the medication you have but will AF definitely come in your situation? I don't like to get people's hopes up but I always think until AF arrives you're still in the game. I had a false positive when I was pregnant with my daughter so it does happen. I guess it's a bit like the implantation bleeding thing I hear it happening to everyone but me but I guess without wanting to mess with your head I'm just saying don't lose hope - it's all we have. 

Glad to hear you're feeling better today phoenix and it sounds like you have a game plan forming. I always think that helps feel in control of a situation even when with this where it's a lot out of our hands. 

I hope your head clears up daisy. How are you feeling otherwise? Are you in a position where you are ready to make a decision about what to do next? 

Xxxxxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey..

I was fine after trigger it's just come on after the IUI. I had it last time as well but it was a little worse. I am just well aware at work that I'm on restricted duties any way due to the fertility treatment and now Im walking around with a big bloated belly. I hope people don't get the wrong idea.. not quite sure how I would cope with that question in a work environment. 

So yes, feel like I've had a kick to the uterus but hopefully will feel better after some sleep. We decided on not having the night away in the end.. instead we have booked for afternoon tea by the river and a walk - if i can manage it. And I think we might go out another day and do something extra special.

We actually have a hot air balloon ride planned for Friday evening.. its the 11th time we have booked it as it always get cancelled.  The weather looks a bit grim though so doubt that will be happening!

Ha.. completely get what you mean re: treatment. Its one thing having a scan.. its a different kettle of fish having the flash light of doom lighting up your lady haven lol. I feel so awkward during that 10 minutes... lieing there half naked trying to act all casual with the hubster!

Least its mixed up our sex lives a bit lol 😂🤣😉 xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Lol if your husband was in the room was that technically a threesome?! 🙊well I hope the bloated feeling doesn't last too long and you're not too uncomfortable, it's sounds like you've got a nice couple of days planned. I have heard about these illusive hot air balloons that are like the gift that keeps giving! You're very brave I don't have a head for heights but I imagine the views will be amazing. X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Matilda: I also had that bloated feeling starting the day of the IUI. I got up the morning after and basically started walking around with my pants unbuttoned whenever I was at home and alone. On OTD I even had to unbutton my pants at a restaurant.   And I was uncomfortable sleeping on my belly right after my IUI as well. And my first indication that the spotting is indeed the start of the miscarriage was when I noticed one evening I had rolled over and slept on my belly for a while and it wasn't uncomfortable. 

And I also had this strange feeling with the midwife after the last IUI. She did the IUI and then said I could stay there for up to 30 minutes if I wanted to and should just go and leave the door open so she knows I left. I was very surprised and asked if I should let the receptionist know also or anyone else. And she said no. It was like the walk of shame... I folded the blanket and left everything tidy and then just walked out.   Like leaving some guys apartment after a one night stand.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Lol! I suppose it does 😋 and he was in the room! I'm a changed woman because of this fertility treatment I tell you!

It was a 1st Wedding Anniversary present and we have been married nearly 4 years! Never mind.. hopefully Ill be pregnant soon then they will have to refund it.. hopefully! 

How are you anyway? Hopefully about 3/4 dpo now? Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Honestly you guys are so lovely and have made me quite teary reading your messages (in a good way if theres any good in all this!). I hate that we are all going through this, but the empathy is just so lovely and I know I wouldn't get it anywhere else  

Hi Matilda, thanks, Im having the beta tomorrow - today was my 14th day. I didn't know they could tell whether the follicle contained an egg - that would be so useful to know as I wondered about it. But I am on the pessaries, does that mean it wouldn't work? Im sorry to hear you're feeling so uncomfortable after the IUI but maybe thats a good thing?! Ovulation maybe?!!!    Hope you are able to do a few nice things in the TWW - afternoon tea sounds good. You never know the weather might hold out for the hot air balloon but judging by its up and down-ness at the moment Im not so sure! 

Hey Tracey - thank you, it did seem like fate but it almost felt too easy. I am really very unsure about AF coming or not (and to be honest I think the doctors are too). I had a few 'fluke' periods but my one that I used for the IUI was a medicated AF - my consultant told me that using the medication would mean periods would be regulated rather than just being random but I don't know if that makes them 'real.' Im also taking the progesterone pessaries so that may be delaying it. To be honest I have had some cramps and loose stools (sorry TMI) which I used to get when I did have periods so I wondered if it might be coming but no sign. I haven't stopped the pessaries yet but will do so when I get the beta results. I am also told I need to change to combined patches again - that will automatically bring on a bleed and part of me is scared in case by some fluke I was pregnant as that would automatically end any pregnancy but once I have the beta results I will have to just believe the results and go with it I guess.

In terms of my plans, I have a whole lot to think about. I had enough meds to do 2 IUI's but it was ordered in 2016 and was meant to have a 2 year expiry date but one of them actually runs out this November which is a big pain. I think it may have to go to waste. I am aware that I didn't respond at all to the medications - although I had a follicle that grew it was already there on its own. Despite the fact that I was taking the same meds I would take if it was IVF so fairly strong stuff, no other follicles developed which they would expect which means that I am still defined as a non-responder. Its means I can't just choose to try again this month or next, and theres no saying when one might randomly be there!

I am due to start a PGCE course to become a teacher in September and its a full on course - if I had been pregnant I would have deferred but given that I know my conceiving is going to be a long haul process I do not feel I can just delay it on the off chance. I know that I could go for a scan every period on the off chance theres a follicle but the course is such that I couldn't just go for a scan every other day like I had to do for this IUI. So if I chose to go ahead I would have to stop uni and then if it hasn't worked I will have wasted even more money and time. Due to my illness I have taken longer to complete my undergraduate degree and haven't worked properly yet and this has always been a priority asap to be able to support any child I do conceive! Although when the doctors were telling me its now or never I was prepared to delay and just support the child any way I could  

So right now, I think it would be best for me to go ahead and qualify (1 year) and restart my attempts afterwards or even after a year of work. I think at that stage I would want more scans to see whats going on but I am very seriously considering just skipping to egg donation. I know my chances are low and Ive been told can't do IVF so if I end up needing egg donation anyway, it just seems better to go there straight away since the success rates are so much higher. Given the costs and everything.. I don't know. It has never really bothered me that the child won't share my DNA as I know I will love them and will be able to explain to them all the decisions I have made. 

Anyway, I do apologise for this massive essay, I think I wrote this more for myself and it has helped to get some things straight in my head. First step beta, next step arrange a follow up appt to discuss this cycle and what they all think as I didn't actually see the consultant during it. Then the rest, I guess I will decide in time! 

Love to everyone Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

just reading your comments and laughing so much lol. Not sure what is weirder, doing IUI with a husband (does he watch?! or is he in a different room?) or doing it on your own and just feeling weird about the whole process!!


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Lol Phoenix! I quickly scooped up the bits on the bed as well and thrust them into the bin! Exactly like leaving a hot guys apartment lol.. I always have a manic race to take clothes on and off so they dont walk in when I'm undressing.. acting all breezy and casual when actually a little peice of me is dieing inside!

I havent slept with anybody new since hubby nearly 8 years ago but I remember that awful anxious feeling well. Its mildly similar to the slap dash breezy undress  lol x


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess

Yes the pessaries would completely and utterly interfere with the progesterone test. From the day 21 bloods I have had done, they measure the progesterone and if its over 30 they class that as ovulatory.

Re Egg Donation.. because I'm so nosey I have looked into this a bit myself .. just incase. And i have read quite a few forum chats on here about the subject as well. What I would say is that yes it is a donated egg, however the foetus is attached to you and is recieving your blood flow. What you choose to eat nourishes the foetus and its you voice and heartbeat that he/she listens to every day. Without you that egg would not grow quite the same with anybody else in the entire world. I just think the entire concept is absolutely beautiful and amazing.. just like adoption. And what is really magic is that you choose that specific egg. I find it heartwarming but I do spend my team being an emotional wreck lol xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Ah thanks Matilda that makes sense. Maybe thats something for me to consider though if I ever was at the stage of having more follicles to see if they are actually viable as I was told by someone that chemo can damage them anyway - so its the whole maybe they won't fertilise cos they're actually damaged! Its so tricky cos no one knows the answers to my million questions haha. 

And I totally agree re egg donation - I feel something you have carried for 9 months, talked to, sung to, that is your baby, you are its mum! I love how your describe it and now I'm all emotional again lol. Thank you  

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Ladies

Jess, I am so happy to read that you're considering donor eggs. And you actually do pass your DNA to the embryo with donor eggs. Apparently a Spanish fertility clinic found in 2015 that amniotic fluid contained DNA from the recipient mother, which means that DNA from the mother found its way into the embryonic/fetal tissues. I also think that carrying, nourishing and birthing are things your body does and that determines so much of the childs life that it kind of does make you a biological mother in a way. Not to mention that without your decision to have a child this child wouldn't exist. Come to think of it without you sickness this child wouldn't even have been thought about. So you kind of get to find the silver lining in your health problems, because once that child is born you will love it and never want to exchange it for any other child. What's better than finding the silver lining in a disease like that?  
Oh and I agree with Matilda: you beat the odds with one follicle before and you wrote yourself that things suddenly started picking up this year with periods. So who knows? There might be more than this one chance.

Still waiting for AF here. Temp is still up, so not today.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess

I completely sympathise with you Jess.. by far during my infertility journey the not knowing leading up to certain stages has just been absolutely horrendous. I suppose they can not answer the questions as they can not assess the grade of your eggs, future embryos unless they are retrieved. Which from what you have said is not a possibility for you. 

At least you have the option to wait out and see regarding future follicles.. as we said you really do not know what is round the corner. I just love the fact that egg donation is now a viable option for ladies these days as well. I know Ive romanticised it above but that it honestly how I feel about it all. Warms by heart a little bit 😍

Please keep us updated re your beta.

I'm feeling a bit better this morning, not as bloated but still sore. Still clearly on the road to recovery which is the main thing. Feel quite irritable today 😠😡 lol.. unfortunately for the hubster but Im off to accupuncture at 12 so hopefully that will restore some sanity lol xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks guys again for taking the time to consider me today. I have now had the beta and will let you guys know the result tomorrow but Im seeing it as just a formality now. 

Matilda - thanks you're right I hate the uncertainty and even my protocol this time was completely invented by one consultant - when I went in no one else knew what was going on and ended up having to ring him etc. I am an ex medical student (had to stop due to my health) and so I like to have all the scientific facts and understand exactly whats going on but they can't give me them! Frustrating! 

Im glad you're feeling less bloated today. How do you find the acupuncture? I always wondered if it was good as Ive heard lots of people get it - do you think it helps? 

Hey Phoenix - thanks I think I actually read an article about the DNA getting passed from the mum too and that made me so happy! You're totally right, Ive always dreamt of having children but before I fell ill and then heard the dreaded words 'premature menopause' it was a future thing that I just thought would happen when it happened. Now I am so much more aware of my fertility and its become more important to me than everything else! How are you feeling today? Still no sign of AF? (Since when do we ever want it to come lol   )

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Evening lovely ladies 💛 hope everyone is good. 

Matilda I think I have sympathy bloatedness for you. Not sure what's going on with my belly but it's one of those days where if I stick it out I think oh I look a little preggo - anyone else do that? No just me 😂 hope you're enjoying some quality time with your husband. 

Phoenix will this be your first period since the mc? I was trying to work out your dates from your signature. Like Jess we normally don't want it to come but in this instance it would be great if it could just crack on! 

Jess it was so lovely to read how you were going through everything in such a rationale way, I tend to wallow in my own self pity so I'm in awe of how you have just taken the situation and been able to form a plan/options so quickly. I guess that's a good way of dealing with it tho. Do keep us posted on your results, I'm a bit dense tho, what does the beta test show? 

Other than a bit of a belly that I can lie next to at night I haven't got much to report. I haven't noticed much cm this cycle especially during and post ovulation. I'm not really one of those that gets hands on in that area but I've definitely noticed there seems to be less this month. It's probably another one of those things that's unexplained but I just thought if throw it out there in case anyone else had experienced it post an iui cycle. 

Much love to you all 😘


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Jess, so glad to hear from you! I hear your frustration about the lack of information. I have a PhD in the medical sciences and want to know everything and check everything. So many medical professionals are not used to answering detailed questions and are totally programmed to give the most non-scientific, noncommittal answer.   Drives me nuts. 

Tracey: yes, it will be my first period. My miscarriage was confirmed on August 3rd and at that appointment I already had a 14 mm follicle, so was already in the second week of my cycle. Ovulation was exactly one week later and today I am on my 23rd cycle day. So still too early for AF, but the end of this cycle is close and that makes me very happy. I am finally getting excited about starting again and found the perfect hotel today. Things are finally going in the right direction again. I love this time of optimism and hope and positivity. Everything is possible again. Unfortunately, "everything" also includes a BFN and miscarriage, but I will keep this thought stacked away until OTD. I think I will try not to test before OTD next time.
What do you all think about that? Last time I started on CD9 and got my first vvvvfl on CD10. I told myself I needed to see the test every morning to soften the blow in case of a BFN. Now I know that even a BFP doesn't mean anything and the line intensity obsession would probably be worse if the lines are not stronger than last time (yes, I've kept all the tests   ). So I feel like I would stress myself out even more now that I know the pain and worry of mc. 

How did you handle the testing urge?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Ah Phoenix it's so hard to resist peeing on a stick isn't it! I find firstly not to have any in the house helps and then I think if I buy one too soon. (ie before OTD) I'll be jinxing it. I'm actually afraid to test so think I could quite happily leave it a week past OTD and be in that unknown hopeful period of time where I think I could be pregnant. I have had a 43 day cycle in the past though so that's probably what's messed with my head and made me cautious about testing even when my period is late. Do you normally have a 28 day cycle or does it vary. At least it's only a few days away for you now.  Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Phoenix - I totally agree with you! I also think that on this journey even the most non-medical amongst us become so well read that we all could have a degree in fertility treatment! We invest so much financially and emotionally that we do want and need to know everything! 

I'm glad you are feeling happier and excited for the next stage. Try not to worry about the other outcomes just yet, just give this your all and we are all hoping this will be your magic cycle. I do not mean to lessen your pain in any way at all, but Ive heard that early miscarriage happens in 1 in 4 pregnancies - obviously we will know about it, but in most incidences people wouldn't even have tested by that stage. So hopefully your mc was nothing 'wrong' with you but just a simple case of not sticking so theres no reason to think it will happen again. Im the same as Tracey - I can't have a test in the house. When I did found one I peed on it lol. Then had to not buy another until the day before OTD (and took it at 2am cos I couldn't wait until morning  ) 

Hey Tracey, the beta test is a quantitative test for hcg - theres a very small (tiny!) chance a pregnancy test may not show positive if the levels are of hcg are still too low. Its unlikely but the only reason I wanted it done is that once I change my patches, if I was pregnant it would end the pregnancy as the medication causes the lining to shed. So I just want to be double sure there is no possibility of that!

And thanks I think thats just my way of dealing with situations lol - always trying to find a solution or at least a plan so I have something to focus on. Right now Im just keeping busy and working as much as I can, knowing that every penny I save will be going towards my future treatment. I don't really know much about significance of cm - I thought I had more during my cycle but with all the hormones you never really know whats just a side effect!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I still have about 50 pregnancy tests from my last round. I ordered 50 cheapie tests when I was still unsure about the spotting because the line kept getting darker for 5 days while already spotting and then bleeding. When my last test was used up I ordered new tests because I wanted to see if the line got darker. But then on the day the new tests arrived the last one from the old batch was suddenly only the same intensity as the OTD-test 7 days before. 
So now I have those 50 tests plus 1 or 2 clearblue tests.   I will just have to be strong.   Or maybe the fear will keep me from testing.  

Tracey, I had huge amounts of cm this cycle, especially ewcm, but I've heard that's common after mc. I had the most ewcm I've ever had, I think. I was actually just thinking this evening that it's hard to know where I stand in this cycle because pregnancy hormones do have huge effects on everything. 

Jess, you're absolutely right about the high percentage of chemical pregnancies. I watched a youtube video the other day that said that 85% of early miscarriages are due to chromosomal aberrations. So that keeps me optimistic and hopeful that it won't happen again. But on the other hand my doctor already prepared me for a BFN because he said that it would already be a great result if every other IUI resulted in a BFP. So basically he thinks next time will be a bust.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Oh no Phoenix thats way too much temptation having so many tests  maybe tell yourself that the cheapie ones won't be accurate?! I think it helped slightly telling myself that if I tested early and it was negative I wouldn't really know so I should just wait until the line would be definitely there if I was pregnant. 

Sorry to be really dumb but whats ewcm lol, I first read it and thought 'ew' lol but I'm thinking thats probably not what you meant   

Aw, its difficult isn't it when theres so many statistics out there about the chances of things working/not working but I think we just have to take it as it comes. When its time it will be time, and all we can hope is that we don't get broken too much in the meantime! I, for one, am really hoping your next time will be successful. Do you have any known fertility problems? Im sure that must count for something as most IUI stats are for people who have had trouble conceiving for several years in order to pursue that route so the lower statistics probably reflect that!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I don't really have any known problems. I have a short-ish luteal phase of maximum 12 days and most doctors want to see 12-14 days. But I am taking progesterone for that starting 2 days after IUI, so that shouldn't make a difference. I have been worried about clotting during my periods, but my doctor doesn't think it's a problem. I'm not sure. I am thinking about adding low-dose aspirin (75 mg) to my next IUI cycle. But I don't know yet.

ewcm is egg-white cervical mucus. So basically the really fertile, stretchy, clear cm you get before ovulation.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Evening ladies

Hope that you are all well ☺

Re: accupuncture I find that it really helps me relax. I really do not like needles but I feel that it really helps me. I specifically go to see a Zita West Trained accupuncturist who specialises in fertility. I have read that accupuncture can help promote a healthy lining and also increase the flow of blood to the uterus. Now that I am in the 2ww Im also snacking on pineapple, Brazil nuts and pomegranate juice as they are all very good for your lining. I keep meaning to buy full fat milk but forgot earlier 🤷🏼

Hows your bloating Tracey? Mines still sticking around as well as tenderness down the left side. Since IUI and taking progesterone I have als developed by a left eye twitch over the last 3 day.. its come on about 8 timea today! Must be a progesterone side effect but I didnt have it last month. I havent been stressed today and Im on my days off so not tired or anything? Odd😞

I had my thyroid checked today and need to increase my dose of thyroxine too 50mg at the say so of my clinic. Ìts currently 2.1 and they want it 1.9 or below. Anybody else on this? 

Phoenix.. I second Tracey and Jess.. I dont have any tests in the house and if I do then it better beware as I will pee on it at the most rediculas dpo! Like a mad woman.. I therefore dont buy them until 12dpo which is my little cut off date that I have invented in my head as perfectly acceptable. 😉

How was your beta Jess? 

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

How often do you have acupuncture Matilda and how long have you been doing it for? I tried it last year but after about 3/4 appointments I just wasn't feeling any reaction to it. Like you I'd read a book on the links with fertility but I also wanted to try and do something to help with stress as I was also having CBT at the time for PTSD. Anyway I also struggled to get a regular appointment so I sacked it off and tried reflexology which I did for about 5/6 months and noticed my cycles getting more regular but again appointment times were a pain so I jacked it in a few months ago. My cycles haven't gone crazy since I ditched it so who knows what works and what doesn't. I might try and do a naked chicken dance in the garden this cycle and if I get pregnant I'm putting it down to that 😂 it's nice to have something for you and to help relax though so I hope it's giving you that bit of TLC. I've been contemplating therapy to talk through everything and maybe address the possibility that I might not get pregnant. In a weird way I enjoyed my CBT (not at the time it was horrendous!) but having rationale and making decisions at the end of it was like a weight off my shoulders. Food for thought. 

As for the bloated belly it's also lingering around. I've been a bit bad with the diet especially the other week when I came on but I generally eat well (also with the 🍍) and I'm "slim" but I've definitely been lacking exercise lately. Was it phoenix who said about exercise and endorphins..? I know it makes sense, just need to get my  off the sofa lol. Do you have an over or under active thyroid then? The eye twitch is a strange one, are you tired or (i'm sorry don't punch me for saying it) but stressed?!?! 

Hope you're OK Jess and have received your results now. Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi guys my beta was less than 1 so definitely no chance I am pregnant. Which is okay as I already knew it just needed to be sure I have now stopped the pessaries - bye bye bum bullets I guess there is one silver lining!

Interesting to hear about the acupuncture Matilda. I find it so hard to know what is worth doing and what isn't, but anything which helps you relax is worth it I'm sure! I don't have any thyroid issues but have heard it can impact fertility so hopefully increasing your dose will help! 

Haha Tracey laughed at the naked chicken dance - you never know   

Hey phoenix, fingers crossed the progesterone should help with the short luteal phase - did you take that the last time too? 

Hope you're doing okay Daisy, you've been quiet but still thinking of you <3 

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Jess, sorry the test was negative (I was hoping for you it wouldn't be) but at least now you know and can plan for the future. I hope you have something lovely planned for yourself over the weekend with a little bit of TLC for yourself. X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Tracey, my mind is at rest now - I needed that confirmation to know for sure, but I am okay. Ive started researching a little and am currently trying to decide whether to order any more donor sperm because my donor is retiring (he's younger than me but yes, apparantly thats what they call it!). I have 1 unit left at my clinic and Ive been told he may have a couple of units left which I could purchase. I really liked him and in particular his lovely message that he'd written for any donor conceived child (it took me a long time to decide on him!) but if I do egg donation I would consider going abroad and then Im not sure how that would work and if they even accept sperm from sperm banks that aren't through them. Its frustrating as Im not really ready to make the decision but then again I wish he was just taking a temporary hiatus!

The next stage for me will be seeing what havoc this cycle has played on AF! Im told once I change to my combined patch a bleed will come. Im waiting till Monday as it gets changed every two weeks and I remember better if its the start of the week.

How are you doing today? And everyone else? 

Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi All
I'm away on family hol (Mum Dad Bro Sis Bro in Law and baby niece) abroad and have extremely limited signal and have also had 3 really horrible migraine days so have been in dark room and therefore haven't even been trying.
Loads of love to you all. I'll have to catch up properly when I get back and have proper signal 
Xxxxxxx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Good to hear from you Daisy but sorry you're suffering with your migraines that sounds terrible  hope you soon feel better and are able to enjoy a bit of the holiday. Let us know when you're home  

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies..

How are we all?

Jess - Hope you are well.. have you come to any decisions about your next step? The fact you donor wrote a little letter sounds very sweet indeed  its the little things in life that make the difference some times.

Tracey - How are you? Hows the 2ww going? I think you will be in week 2 now?

Hope your both doing Daisy and Phoenix?

I'm 6dpiui now..to say that it is dragging is an understatement. No real symptoms other than a twitchy left eye lol and the odd shooting pain front and back passages now and then! Which is odd but Ive had the most weird and wonderful symptoms at times that have come to Jack 💩 so I am by no means getting my homes up!

Had my hot air balloon ride which was awesome! Very surreal at first.. me and hubster were both pooping it however we both loved it in the end. Currently sat in the backgarden in the sweltering heat. Love British weather today ... finally! Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey Matilda, its impossible isn't it.. are symptoms really symptoms and do they mean anything! If its any consolation my dr told me not to look out for them as they were really unlikely that early! 

Amazing that you were able to do your hot air ride! Its very hot today isn't it! I only like the heat when I have nothing to do, but living in London I don't have a garden and its not so appealing sitting with the other millions of people on any patch of grass in sight  

Today AF came which is weird/good. Im still on oestrogen only patches and was switching to combined patches tomorrow (I switch them every 2 weeks so prefer to make the change on a Monday as more likely to remember!). I was told a bleed would come when I changed back to combined patch but its obviously made its appearance earlier! I feel like that must be a good thing as it didn't need to be artificially brought back - I was slightly worried that all the suppressing of it by progesterone would stop it as for several years I had no bleed at all. So now Im confused which patch to use tomorrow, might have to ring them!

As for decisions I have made an apt with the consultant to review this cycle. Its not till October but thats okay, Im going to write lots of questions down as I feel much more clued up now then I did before my IUI so Ill be all ready. I think then I will have a better idea but Im having a little look into potential avenues still. 

Hope everyones surviving and not dying in the heat!

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess

That sounds like really positive news re AF coming on her own accord. Certainly a turn up for the books by the sound of things, I'm pleased for you that things seem to be making there way in the right direction.😊 I bet it was a welcome surprise when she showed.

Gosh I know re: symptom spotting.. I've been ttc for 20 months so I really should know better. I literallly can not help it though.. it feels like one of those months where I know I will test as soon as trigger is gone. Sometimes I have strong warrior months when I wait out AF in some sort of power struggle.. obviously she comes.. but then some months I just completely lose my 💩 and test like I am an absolute crazy lady 🙈 strange! Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hope everyone is enjoying the ☀, so good of summer to finally make an appearance at the end of August! 😂 

Jess how lovely that the donors write notes and crazy the term retirement almost like it's a job! Do you know when he's planning to make his last deposit? Glad you have your appt booked in, October will be here before you know it but it's good to have some time to think and like you say write all your questions down. 

Glad you got your hot air balloon ride in Matilda, my friend finally managed hers on the same night too so there was something in the air clearly. When can you test? Are you into the second week now? 

I've been a bit snappy and then blue over the weekend which I shouldn't have as it's bank holiday so I'm thinking it's pmt and  I'll be on in a few days so once that comes we'll start IUI #2. Part of me is obviously hoping that we've managed to score naturally but going by the past two years I'm not getting my hopes up! X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey

I always think we are allowed to be a bit snappy during the two week wait with the chemical cocktail brewing away inside us and what not! But I know what you mean.. I start to feel guilty that I'm being horrid. Or if I'm feeling blue and have "wasted the day" moping around I feel bad about it when really we shouldn't. We need to give ourselves a break from time to time. Its hard work dealing with infertility!

I have been an absolute rediculas moron and I tested earlier, 9dpt.. 7dpiui. Do not even ask me why.. I am a fool. And I'm ashamed of myself! It was positive.. which is the first I have ever seen however will clearly be the trigger. My form in the trigger box says it can stay in your system upto 10 days but ladies from google say maybe more. Clearly I have lost the plot this month.. I knew it was coming 🙈🙈🙈 My insides just felt a bit different but of course they are going too as they have been artificially stimulated. Needless to say taking the test was absolutely pointless and has just tortured my deranged mind further lol. Somebody slap me x


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

I'm not even going to tell my husband as he will be disappointed in me! 🙉


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Matilda,

don't beat yourself up over testing. I also tested for the first time at 7 dpIUI and also got a trigger line. Until recently there this HCG elimination calculator (German website) where you could enter the number of units you injected and the body weight and it would tell you how much HCG you still have in your system (urine and blood levels). Unfortunately the site was closed.   
Try to look at it in a positive way: some people get HCG again some time after IUI or IVF to help implantation and you just tested to see there is still some HCG left, which can now help your little ball of cells implant in a nice spot.  

It is so easy to get impatient and start testing early. I think I don't want to start testing before OTD or maybe not even test at all next time, but now that school has started and I'm back at work, I might test early just to soften the blow and to not get a BFN on the morning of a school day or, even worse, feel my period start in the middle of the school day. 
So I will say, enjoy your pregnancy symptoms and try not to test. But also, I will probably do the same again.  

AFM, I finally have my CD1 today and have my first appointment this Thursday to check for any cysts left over from my miscarriage. I didn't have that scan last time, so apparently miscarriages are associated with cysts... I hope everything is fine so I won't have to wait another month or so...  
I also emailed my clinic this morning to let them now the approximate dates. I am SO happy and relieved that I can start again. Waiting was tough and I think it was even tougher since I was on school holidays and didn't have any distraction at all. Going back today was great, but I was shocked to see one colleague pregnant and already in her 7th month or so. I hadn't even noticed before the summer break.
I'm sure you can all relate to the feeling of shock and sadness and then guilt, because of course it's great that she is having a healthy pregnancy. And then I think that everyone gets pregnant and has no problems and why did I have this miscarriage (I could be in my 9th week now)?? But of course I don't know how long other people try and they might have had a lot of heartbreak before that one successful one... what do I know?! Oh so many feelings.   

Jess, it is great to hear that AF showed up on its own and on time!!!! I think that is promising and whatever you're doing nutrition-wise seems to be working! You wrote something about October: do you have an appointment of figure out a game plan or do you have a new try then?

Tracey, sounds like we'll be doing IUI #2 at around the same time! We have to keep each other sane in the tww then!


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Argh Matilda!!! 🙈🙈 so in terms of the trigger it was a day early? Are you going to test tomorrow or do you think you can keep yourself busy and distracted at toilet time?! Do you have anymore tests in the house? It's easy to do tho, I was thinking earlier how much more bloated I still feel and there's that crazy voice that says well maybe you were pregnant from last month but it was just a really really heavy implantation bleed.... I swear this process sends us crazy 😵

And you're spot on with the guilt. I sit there and think why am I so miserable when I have so much to be thankful for. But as you say you can't help feeling blue at times x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Sorry phoenix, your reply before mine didn't show when I refreshed first time... Glad to hear that you're now on your new cycle and you can hopefully get started again this week. Fingers crossed there are no cysts, I'm sure everything will be fine. And I totally get the mixed emotions you feel when someone you know is pregnant. One of my friends had her baby last week and although I was over the moon for her it just puts time into context... She's manage to conceive, be pregnant and give birth and I'm no further on <cue &#127931; > anyway onwards and upwards and all that, I should be not too far behind you in this cycle xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hello Ladies

I have Internet if I sit in this position and don't move an inch! I've been reading through all your posts. So much I can relate to. I've also had the crazy thought that because I'm still so bloated perhaps I could be pregnant and that my heavy period was just extremely heavy implantation bleeding.

I'm enjoying my hol with my family but literally go from one minute absolutely loving spending time playing with and cuddling my 6 month old niece ( my sisters baby--- sister is 9 years younger than me) to just staring at sister husband and baby thinking how perfect their life is and how much I want a) baby b) husband and wondering why I'm torturing myself by spending a week with them.

Agghhhh

Better go and be sociable
I'll send proper replies when I'm back from Wed

Byeeeee

Daisy  xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi everyone, there seems to be have been a flurry of posting since I last checked!

Oh Matilda, hugs, don't beat yourself up, we've all been there! But try to hold out now for as long as you can before OTD, you don't want to be checking every day and having no idea whether its accurate/inaccurate with the trigger shot. You can do it and everything is crossed!

Good luck with your appointment on Thursday, Phoenix, hope everything is fine to go ahead!

Tracey hope AF comes soon so you can get a move on!

Hey Daisy, lovely to hear from you, we've missed you. Its hard isn't it, I work in child care so spend a lot of time with little ones and often the parents have no concept of how lucky they are. I've been asked before if 'my son' would like something when pushing one of them in his buggy - I nearly burst into tears. But all children are a blessing, we'll get to enjoy our own sure enough  

As for me, I have had terrible cramps with AF - its been years since I had period pains, who knows what that means but Im seeing it as good lol. Sperm donor has already retired, Tracey! The guy in charge is really helpful and says theres a couple of units left but I don't really know if I should order them or not. If I was to do treatment abroad I don't even know if you can use that bank, and if I have units sitting in London how would I get them to wherever I decide to go?! Its bad timing as I wish I could have the review appt before making any decisions!

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

OK I'm officially starting to lose the plot! 😂 so I'm on cd23, 10dpo so based on my previous cycles (average) I should be due on anytime from now. I'm very aware that after all the meds this cycle could play havoc but I've just started thinking ooh I haven't had cramps yet and although I was a bit of a stroppy cow a few days ago that could be a pregnancy symptom and just now at work I made my breakfast and coffee (decaf boo) and the milk smelt funny in my cereal. It has 6 days left on the bbf date and it didn't float in my coffee so it's not gone off so my crazy voice is like ooh sensitive to smells...pregnancy symptom?!? Argh, hate this game! I just feel like writing this down with any hope will make mother nature 🐄 think oh no I must squash those dreams and make me come on which is fine so I can just move on to the next cycle. Sorry I'm rambling and have lost it! Hope everyone else is OK! X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Agghh sending love. It's really tough when it's dominating your every thought xxxxxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

How is everyone? 

Matilda, you're 12 dpo today, right? How crazy are you by now   Sorry! I hope you're totally zen and enjoying every little feeling.  

Tracey, has AF shown up yet? 

Jess, why are you thinking about getting treatment abroad? Is it necessary for IVF? Or because of donor eggs?

Daisy, hope you're feeling better! How is everything with you?

As for me, I had my cd4 appointment today and am happy to report that everything is looking well. I have quite a few follicle on both ovaries and no cysts or other strange looking things hanging out.   I will go back for cd10 scan next Wednesday. 
I am so relieved that I am very positive and very happy about the new try. I was worried that negative thoughts and fear of another mc would still be dominant and that I wouldn't be able to enjoy this, but that is not the case. I am SO excited!


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Phoenix, so lovely to hear you excited about this cycle after your mc. It is exciting to see the follicles and encouraged by watching them grow. I think it's great and gives a positive vibe which is just the environment you need for a little squatter to claim rights 😊 are you doing a medicated or natural cycle? So scan on weds and then this time next week you could be getting ready for the insemination? 

No sign of AF yet which I'm trying not to (and failing) get too worked up about. I just hope it doesn't come too late and I always find it a bit harder when my period comes late as the longer the cycle is the more I get my hopes up. 

Hope everyone else is OK 💛💛 xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hi Phoenix, so happy to hear you're feeling positive and optimistic - a few follicles is good news and hopefully they will be growing nice and fat and juicy! 

As for abroad, yes would be if I was doing donor eggs - no firm decisions made but egg donation in the UK is much more expensive and hard to find donors - can be long waiting lists. In other countries they can be paid for it and it is anonymous, I think thats why there are more donors available - but obviously a lot to consider and Im not at that stage just yet. I also posted on the high FSH group and a lot of people also recommended natural/mild IVF which again is cheaper abroad though I believe some places in London are more experienced with it than others. 

Hi Tracey, hope AF comes soon so you can get moving, how are you feeling about the next stage?

How is everyone else? I guess you are back now Daisy? And Matilda, are you being good and withstanding the test temptation? 

Im doing okay, start my teaching course on Monday so trying to get my head out of the clouds with babies and fertility and get into study mode - its hard when its an ever pressing consideration on my mind to just be able to put it to one side, but I know waiting is long term for the best for both me and my eventual child. AF still here, gave me terrible cramps which I'm putting down to the lining being a proper thickness to be shredded from all the hormones, but the cramps are gone now and its nearly done with so onward and upwards!

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Yes, I am doing a natural cycle, but am triggering ovulation with the ovitrelle pen (HCG) and will be taking progesterone to support implantation and prolong the luteal phase.
And yes, I might be triggering and booking my flight or getting my car ready for a road trip one week from today.   
Can't wait!

Tracey, I totally understand your feelings. My cycle was 1 day longer this time than it normally is. On day 25 or 26 I had strange pains around my ovary. I honestly thought about taking a pregnancy test because I feared that it might be a an ectopic pregnancy... I had had 2 follicles for my last IUI so I thought I might have miscarried one and the other one might have implanted in the fallopian tube.... which is nonsense, because my bHCG 22 dpiui was 18   
And even crazier: when I went for my ultrasound yesterday there was this very tiny voice that said, maybe there is still a gestational sac and I only miscarried one.    I know exactly when my pregnancy symptoms disappeared and I definitely knew I am not pregnant, because I loved my pregnancy symptoms and there haven't been any in a month, but the brain is a crazy old lady that likes to mess with us.  

Jess, if you' re looking at danish clinics let me know. I've researched lots of them and am very happy with my choice. The teaching course will help with everything. School started in Germany this week and I am so happy to get back into it and to have distractions from the crazy baby train.   

Daisy, where are you in terms of cycle and tww?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Phoenix I had exactly the same thought after my iui last month as I had two follicles and I thought ooh maybe one survived?? Clearly they need to teach us better about reproduction in school! Fingers crossed your cycle goes to plan and doesn't interfere with the wedding dates. Bring on Wednesday and you'll be able to sort your game plan!

Sorry to hear you had bad cramps Jess but good to hear you're feeling better and also have a welcome distraction from all of this. Is your next step your appt in October?

I'm cd 26, 13 dpo so normally I'm out the game by this point but I'm wondering that I'll have a longer cycle this month due to my uber short cycle last month plus the meds. I'm dreading going for a wee but also so far no AF cramps. I've been a bit cranky and spotty tho. Who knows!

Matilda you've been a little quiet... Hope you're OK, are you due to test now?

Hope you enjoyed your holiday daisy and have had a safe trip back xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Helloooo
I'm back. Got back on Wednesday but my Parents were staying...bit awkward to be on this forum when they are around!

Tracey and Matilda..I'm keeping everything crossed for you ...I'm getting apprehensive and excited for you!

JJJ! Good that you have a plan to see your Consultant in Oct and to ask lots of questions.

PHoenix, glad to read you sounding more positive.  Are you a teacher?  ARe you German, or do you just live there?

I made a hard decision not to do to cycle and to wait until next month where I'm around so I can do a medicated cycle.  hard though as I still tested ovulation so I know that I ovulated yesterday and I therefore could have had an IUI today...seems like iM wasting a month.

The nurse sent me an e mail saying what my medicated cycle will involve...if I copy and paste it below can you tell me your thoughts pls.

Also I have a question.  Bu taking the medication etc is it likely to lengthen my cycle the time In between AF day 1 and IUI or is it likely to stay the same length of time as it has in a usual cycle.

I have a concern that I'm mean to be at a family gathering watching my brother do a marathon on a day when I think it's likely that I might have to go in for a scan/ trigger. 

I'm scared to tell my boss that I going to need lots of time off for scans etc, and still don't know what to tell my team...ideally I wouldn't want them to know, but if Imgoing to be needing every other day for a week, I think I should tell them something.

Also last Qu...what is OTD?

DAisy xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

This is from nurse...can you tell me how it sounds to you, if I should be requesting anything different..thoughts etc.  I have no experience of anything except a totally 'natural' IUI 

Thanks xxxx


.....you are looking at 4-5 scans - depending on how you are responding to the medication.

You will have a baseline scan on day 2 or day 3 of your cycle.

You will then come one week later for a scan.

Then every 2nd day until you have a dominant follicle.

Your medication will cost 678 pounds which includes x 2 900 Gonal F pens, one ovitrelle trigger and one box of cyclogest (luteal support)


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

I have so many questions tonight...sorry

Will they be able to tell from a scan if ive ovulated?

I've heard you all talk about taking temperatures to check on ovulation...how does this work?

Thanks xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Daisy

I haven't been on Gonal F, so I can't say anything about that.
I also had my baseline scan yesterday (cycle day 4) and will go back on cycle day 10 and possibly also cycle day 12 and 14, if necessary. They can see ovulation from a scan, but my doc and my clinic in Copenhagen just want the follicle to measure between 18 and 22 mm before I trigger. Last time I had a 19 mm follicle in the morning and triggered 14 hours later. My clinic didn't do an ultrasound before IUI, but I felt the ovulation, so wasn't interested in that scan anyway.

As for taking the temperature: it is something that you need to do for a few month to be able to really take any conclusions from it. Basically you start on cycle day 1 with a certain temperature. It will then drop a little right before ovulation and then rise a lot (about 0.5 °C) right after that, because the ruptured follicle, then called corpus luteum, produces progesterone, which has an influence on the basal body temperature. The temperature usually drops a little before AF. If it doesn't drop it could be because you still have high progesterone levels due to a pregnancy. But measuring BBT doesn't tell you anything if you're supplementing progesterone after IUI.

AFM, yes I am a teacher now, used to be a scientist. And I'm german.


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, hope you're OK.. I was on gonal f so here was my experience...

I had a scan on cd2 to measure follicles, I was then given gonal f (75 dose) which I injected for 5 days and then on cd7 I went back for a scan where I had two follicles one at 1.8 and one at 1.9 (my hospital said anything bigger than 1.7 was good) I then did an ovulation test at the hospital which didn't show a rise in lh so I did another gonal injection that day. I took the trigger injection (ovietelle) that night on cd7 and had the iui on cd9 (36 hours later after trigger) so that was all pretty quick, my cycles are a few days shorter and I responded quickly to the medication. My downfall was my period started 5 days before I should have come on (ie I should have come on 2 weeks after the trigger but it was more like a week and a bit) but I wasn't offered progesterone which can help lengthen the leutral phase (and therefore give more time for implantation) so my only advice is to make sure you're offered that as I almost felt short changed that I wasn't offered it. So in answer to your question it could make your cycle length change, it depends how you respond to the meds. And OTD is official testing day 😊 hope this helps xxx

Also my hospital did a blood test a week after the iui to measure progesterone to check if ovulation has taken place x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Sorry just re read your post and looks like your meds do include leutral support so that's good 👍


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Cd1 for me. Mixed emotions as I was obviously hoping that we wouldn't have to go through it all again but then I feel stupid to think why would it be any different from the other 24+ cycles. Anyway, no time for a pity party really, hopefully I'll be able to get a vaginal probe booked in for Monday. I so wish they operated 7 days a week, I worry about missing dates in particular ovulation if it falls over a weekend. X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Tracey, sorry to hear about AF! Would have been awesome to get a BFP from a natural cycle.
Why would you miss ovulation if it falls on a weekend? Will they not open for IUI on a weekend?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Phoenix, how are you today? I'm not sure about opening times at the weekend, it's at an NHS hospital so I just assume they're Monday to Friday? It didn't fall over a weekend last time so wasn't a problem but I'll ask the question this time. In other news after thinking that I had my period this morning it has not appeared... There was (sorry TMI) brownish discharge this morning so I thought I'm not playing the implantation game and just bunged a tampon in but I haven't had a drop all day... It just messes with my head when nature plays these games. The wait continues.. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Tracey! That sounds promising! Keeping my fingers crossed for you!

I am still excited and happy and can't wait for Wednesday to get here and so I can see my follicles.   I am driving myself a little nuts with nutrition. I don't have any known fertility issues, but I've read about egg cell quality and nutrition. So now I'm regretting every sugary drink, every little bit of caffeine, I am too worried about protein intake and artificial sweeteners etc.
I have many friends who got pregnant during vacations that involved a lot of alcohol, coffee and fast food, so I think it can't be too much of an issue, but they also didn't have to use frozen sperm and had many, many free 'shots'  

How do you all handle nutrition and ttc?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

As I thought just the universe playing a little game on me! AF definitely started this morning.

Well in terms of nutrition I've read and tried a few things but bits I stick to are decaf coffee, pineapple (I was told the core before ovulation is particularly good), lots of water and just general healthy eating. As for alcohol if I fancy a drink pre ovulation I'll have one as it can help with having to DTD 🙊 but then I won't have any after I've ovulated. Don't get me wrong I've had months where we've been on holiday or had a wedding etc and I've just ignored all ruled as sometimes I think it's good to blow off a bit of steam. It's tricky though as you pointed out some ppl get pregnant not paying any attention to food and drink x


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey everyone, sorry have been a bit quiet - my dad had a major accident and has managed to shatter his leg so mind has been elsewhere. Have read through your news but sorry if I miss anything!

Tracey - Im sorry to hear its definitely AF but that's okay - onwards and upwards with the next stage and at least its come now. I had similar worries being at an NHS hospital and stuff happening over the weekend. My follicle reached 18mm on a Friday and how it worked was that they had me take one more stim injection the Friday night and then I had the trigger shot at 3am on Sunday morning and IUI Monday 3pm. I think they work it out so it can fit around weekends as they had to call up to find the exact times to tell me. 

Phoenix - thanks will definitely bear that in mind! Can I ask how do you manage having to go for scans etc with being a teacher? Do they know your situation? Let us know how the scan goes on Wednesday! I went mad with nutrition and supplements but it made no difference and I realised I was stressing myself out too much - if I slipped up I would feel guilty etc. My FSH only went up during this time! Now I just try to be vaguely healthy but Im not going crazy. It might work for some but I find Im at more of a happy medium!

Daisy - questions are good! I think some people can tell from scans if you have ovulated but its not always possible. The temperatures can only really be useful it you've done it for a few months already but my clinic recommended clear blue ovulation test kits (they said boots or other brands not accurate enough - but clear blue are quite expensive!). They told me to take one 7am and 7pm to detect LH surge - it can happen quickly and then go down again so both tests are needed in the day. I had 6 scans - initial one, then one after 7 days and then one every other day until the dominant follicle (its called that at 14mm) reached 18mm which it has to be to have highest chance of containing an egg. It was a lot but mine grew quite slowly, I think a lot of people have less. Are you taking one cyclogest a day? I needed more than one box but was taking 2 per day - you can always order more if need be. Definitely think you made the right decision to do medicated cycle so don't see this month as wasted! Fingers are crossed!

Matilda - how are you? You've been quiet but hopefully you are just keeping busy to occupy TWW. We are thinking of you and praying hard for good news! 

Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Jess, I'm so happy to hear from you. I was wondering where you went. Sorry, about your dad. Accidents like that really throw you, don't they?! I hope you're father makes a speedy and, more importantly, full recovery.  
My school doesn't know about my situation and I don't plan to make it that public. My first IUI was during the last week of school before summer, so we didn't have the usual lesson plan and I was sharing the week with another teacher, so it was ok to be away for one morning (scans) and one day. I basically called in sick, because it's a doctors appointment that I couldn't postpone and I would do the same thing for any other medically necessary procedure that I can't postpone. 
This time I was lucky since my new lesson plan for this school year is awesome: I start school at 11 am 4 days of the week. That means, of course, that I am there longer in the afternoon, but this is awesome for scans and doctors appointments. If the IUI falls on a weekday again, I'll call in sick again, because for me it's medically necessary. 
Will it be a problem for you to have the treatments while working as a teacher?
And yes, I had the same experience with nutrition. I was so careful last time, but it was a miscarriage anyway. So now I think, I might just focus on being relaxed and happy.

Tracey, sorry to hear it was AF after all. But, as Jess said, the next chance is around the corner. When will you start treatment? 

Yes, Matilda, where are you? Hope you're well!


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Thanks Phoenix, yes its been upsetting to see him so fragile   but he will be okay just recovery might take a while. 

Ah okay thats useful to know! I can't think I would want to tell a school where I was working - maybe its just me but the few people I told this time seemed to think that it was almost a guarantee that I would have a child at the end, despite me telling them the odds, and its that much harder having to let everyone know it didn't happen. And those were very close friends so can't imagine telling work - I think I will try to keep it to myself/family next time. 

It would be difficult I think as when I had my IUI I was having scans every other day so wouldn't be able to miss that much! And I think starting later or finishing early are rare here - I'll be doing primary school teaching so its pretty much you have your class all the time. But I have been thinking that since I am young and do have time more on my side I may use the summer holidays as my 'TTC time'. Then if I reach the stage where I need/want to go full out I will take some time away. 

I think you're spot on with being relaxed and happy, just be as happy and healthy as you can! 

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi everyone,

Jess sorry to hear about your dad, sending you a   and hoping he makes a full recovery. Sounds like you have a plan forming and it sounds like a good idea to try it during the summer holidays so you don't have to worry about time off. Will that definitely mean you can't use the same sperm doner? I know you said there was a time limit with him.

Matilda I'm keeping everything crossed that you're out celebrating today, I've been thinking of you 💛

Thanks phoenix I've felt a bit blue the last couple of days but looking forward to getting excited about big fat juicy follicles! 

I had my cd2 scan today and back on the gonal f today with a scan on Friday. They said they do inseminations on the weekend if need be  but looking at dates I don't think mine will land then. Bit of an awkward one but my next scan is on Friday and I don't have any childcare as it's my day off. Last time I had an appointment on a Fri my husband helped out but the appt was quite early. I haven't been so lucky with times this time round and it's difficult for him to get time off work (they don't know our situation) and I don't have anyone I can ask (we've not told people) so I've got to take her with me. She's 3.5 so I'm hoping I can distract her with a film (it should be fine) but I do feel awkward about taking her to the clinic. I know I'm blessed to have a child already and sometimes I feel awkward when people don't have children already like they must be thinking why are you here. I don't want to seem like I'm rubbing it in anyone's faces (trust me I'd rather have the appointment on my own) but I'm really stuck this time. Would you be offended if someone turned up with a child to a fertility clinic? Fingers crossed it won't be busy and no one else will be there! X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Tracey

I think it's fine to take a child to the fertility clinic. I agree that I wouldn't do it if there was another solution, in your situation that's just what you need to do. Yes, you already have a child, but that doesn't mean that you're not allowed to try for a sibling or should feel bad about that. 

For someone who struggles to get pregnant there are difficult situations every day and everywhere. When I was miscarrying I had to go to my regular OB/gyn and there were lots of very happy pregnant women there and they had an entire wall of baby photos in the waiting area and I was looking at that wall for 20 minutes thinking that I am probably miscarrying at that moment. That felt so ironic. 
Then I was asked to babysit my niece just 4 days after I knew I lost my pregnancy. It felt impossible to do (but I did). 
And remember when Jess went babysitting the night of her BFN? 
My point is, our situation is annoying and really bad at times, but it isn't made worse by running into a child at a fertility clinic. That's just everyday life.


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Good point, thanks Phoenix. Are you all set for tomorrow? Are you thinking you will have the insemination before the end of the week then? How does this work with your brothers wedding?


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Tracey

I am very excited about tomorrow and am hoping for big follicles. My brothers wedding is on Saturday and my cycle day 14 will be Sunday. I think IUI will be Sunday, Monday or Tuesday. Saturday will be cycle day 13 and that would be an early ovulation for me, so I don't expect the follicle to be big enough for IUI on Saturday. 
If it's Sunday, I will take the ovitrelle Friday evening and would have to leave the wedding early (around dinner time) to get to Copenhagen in time. So that is not ideal, but it has advantages: driving back during the day on Sunday will be easier, since there is no rush hour traffic (that prolonged the trip by 4 hours last time), I would also not have to miss school. 
But Monday or Tuesday would be fine as well. I just hope I do have good follicles and it would be great if the timing was as awesome as last time. I really do think that timing is everything and that it does make a huge difference. 

How are you? Are you as excited about the new try as I am?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Keeping my fingers crossed for you Phoenix that everything goes to plan. You're definitely sounding calm and relaxed about it which is great! And yes I agree timing is everything. It would be great not to have to miss work through it at well. We could be in the 2ww together as going by how I responded last time I could end up having the insemination on Monday. We go away for a few days next Thursday so as long as it's before that I'm happy! I'm not quite there with the excitement and positivity yet which is disappointing. My husband is still feeling a bit low about it all but I'm sure once I've had my scan on Fri and once we get down to the insemination etc the excitement will kick in. I remember being super positive and happy last cycle when I saw how much my follicles had grown. Let us know how you get on tomorrow, I'm thinking big for you! X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Tracey, tww together would be awesome!!! I didn't expect that after you had to wait for AF a little longer than me. 
I can imagine that going through this with two people is even harder than alone since everyone handles disappointment and grief differently. As a single person I just deal with my emotions and once I am done with my negative phase I can move on. But if the emotions of two people are involved and those people don't deal with stuff at the same speed it can be harder. 
How long have you been trying and how many IUIs did you have already? Maybe my positivity is naiveté, because it is only my second IUI and I was only disappointed once so far.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Sorry I've been elusive.  I'm also a teacher and have been frantically trying to prepare for my new students.  Have also had a bad head...again. 

Matilda...where are you..are you OK?

Tracey and Phoenix..thanks v much for your detailed replies to me...very helpful and JJJ thanks to you too.  I will go back and really read and digest what you've all said.

JJJ how's your Dad doing?  Are you managing to focus on your course?

PHoenix...I'm excited for you doing this cycle.. Good that you will hopefully get to go to some of the wedding.

Tracey..excited for you too.

Unlike you Phoenix I've had to tell my school as its a 4/5 hour round trip for me to get into London to the clinic.  The Head has been really good about it.  I also braved telling my new TAs today...its a big big school and we'd never spoken before yesterday.  It was a risk but I though if we were going to have a working relationship I couldn't miss part/ all of 5/6 days within a  12 day period so early on in the school year without giving a reason. The conversation was cut v short after about 2 mins but they seemed supportive.  Phewwww

Right I'm going to bed.  I was a complete insomniac last night..still awake at 2.45am and alarm went off at 6.  Maybe it's preparing me for sleepless nights as a Mum 

Night night xxxxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Phoenix, we've been trying for two years for #2. We were blessed with our daughter and conceived within a few months so to be honest we didn't really expect to have any problems second time round. All our tests came back fine so there's no reason why we can't make another baby...it just hasn't happened. Although I'm grateful that there isn't anything medically wrong, the whole unexplained infertility is frustrating as there's no reason for it but as one of my many mantras from this experience, there's no point stressing about the things that I can't change! We have had one go of IUI so far in which I came on 5 days early but didn't have the progesterone support which I've requested this time. If this cycle doesn't work we won't do another one. As you know, the cost mounts up and before you know it you're well on your way towards spending what a round of IVF would have cost (with better success rates). We didn't feel ready for IVF which was why we opted for IUI but we may have to make a decision about it in the future - or not 🙏🙏🙏 your positivity is just the tonic you need phoenix, I honestly believe it helps with creating a happy environment for a baby  😊

Hi Daisy, sorry to hear you're still suffering with your head. I'm glad to hear your head and staff are understanding of your situation. When will you start your next cycle do you think? Hope you get a better night's sleep tonight xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Ladies,

my cycle-day-10-appointment went well. I have one follicle, which measures 20 mm x 14 mm. At first, I thought I might have to trigger tonight and leave tomorrow night, but then I learned that the measurements of the two dimensions are added and then divided by two, to get a more accurate measurement. So I am actually at 20 + 14 = 34 mm and that divided by 2 = 17 mm.
I will go for another scan on Friday and expect the follicle to grow another 3 mm. So it looks like a Friday night trigger and Saturday night drive to Denmark.  
I felt the follicle yesterday evening, so I wasn't too surprised by the size (last IUI I had measurements of 15 mm x 13 mm on day 11) And since I feel it all the time now I am worried about early ovulation, so I started using my ovulation sticks. They are really sensitive and don't show anything yet. Phew.  

Tracey, I can only imagine how difficult unexplained fertility is. I completely agree that dealing with any sort of sickness is kind of easier once you know what it is and how to tackle it. Just living the 'unknown' and trying things that might not change anything is really hard.  . But we'll be very positive about your new try as well!     . We can totally do this!

JJJ, how is your dad? 
And yes, I had the same experience with people being very sure about me getting pregnant the first time. Not many people know, but my family was very positive and always said that they just can't see a reason that it won't work. So, after the miscarriage I was the tiniest (just the tiniest) bit happy that they might now be a little more reserved about that and just also accept the fact, that it might take time. It takes the pressure of and hopefully will also keep people from texting every day starting 10 dpIUI to ask if I know anything yet. We'll see.

Daisy, do you always have headaches like that? Do you think it's the hormones?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Morning 😴

Phoenix great to hear your scan went so well and hooray that the timing has all worked out for you too! So this means insemination on Sunday so you don't miss work but also you'll only have to leave the wedding in the evening? It's all falling into place... It's amazing how in tune you are with your body to actually feel the follicle 😍 fingers crossed ovulation doesn't happen early for you and it all continues to plan.

I have my cd6 scan tomorrow. Last cycle it was on day 7 but it's a day earlier this time because of the weekend. Last time by cd7 I was ready to go in terms of size so being a day early this time I'm trying to remind myself that I may not have uber big follicles this time around. I'm not a very patient person so really not suited to this whole waiting game! X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hello Ladies

Oohhhhh Phoenix and Tracey ...it's all happening.  I'm excited and hopeful for you.

TRacey, when you say you hope you're ready to go..what do you mean..I'm still so naive about this medicated process.  DO you mean ready to start the medication etc?

Can't remember who asked about my head...yes always prettybad..I have cranium continuum <( a continous headache which just varies in intensity) and chronic migraine in addition. Have had since I was 16... Consultants have ALWAYS said to me that if I got pregnant it could change my headaches and migraines for ever...could make the dramatically better...or worse!!  That is mostcertainly NOT my reason for wanting a family ( I hope you wouldn't think that it was) But it means I'm particularly worried about the effects of the hormone medication..it could make me into a migrainey mess.
It can't be the hormones already making it worse as I haven't been medicated.

My period is due on Sept 13th, but I'm pretty sure AF will be early because I've had light period pain last three days.  I think I must get this every month...but I only really noticed it once I started this process.

Love to you all.

WOuldnt it be AMAZING if we all got BFP this time around

Xxx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey guys! Happy to see things are progressing well for you both Tracey and Phoenix, I've got everything crossed for you     

Its funny that there are three (well 2 and a half as I don't really count yet  ) teachers in our little group - it must have been difficult having to tell your new TAs Daisy - its never an easy conversation especially with someone you don't even know   

Sorry to hear about the terrible migraines as well Daisy that must be so difficult, and Im guessing you have to avoid taking anything for them at the moment which probably doesn't help. I don't get migraines but had a few bad headaches from the hormones and since I didn't want to take paracetamol I found that heat (I used a microwaveable neck hot thing) on the top of my head and an ice pack over my forehead (or maybe it was the other way around can't remember  ) seemed to help. Im sure you've probably tried everything but I just remember trying things in desperation one day and found it helped!

As for me, I have started my teaching course and its been very intense but I am enjoying it and think I am on the right path   its hard to put my baby thoughts to the side, and those conversations about peoples nieces/nephews/babies seem to have been happening a lot in the last few days and inside I silently cry but outside its the smile we grin and bear. My dad is still in hospital and they still aren't able to operate so its a waiting game, ill be home again to see him on the weekend. Thanks for all your very kind words  

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi everyone 💛

Phoenix are you all set for the weekend?

Glad to hear your teaching is going well Jess and I understand how hard it is to be happy on the outside when you're not 100% feeling it inside. I find chocolate always helps after   hope your dad is OK and you enjoy the weekend with him.

Daisy will you start your first medicated round then when AF arrives? Exciting! When I said ready to go it was to mean ready for the insemination. So I take the meds from cd2 and last time I had big enough follicles by cd7.

So for me I had my cd6 scan today (a day early due to the weekend) and I wasn't expecting there to be much there but I have one follicle at 1.8 already and a couple at 1.4. I'm not due to ovulate (did a test at hospital) so they've reduced my dosage down and due to inseminate on Monday. I have to do another ovulation test tomorrow just to make sure I'm not about to ovulate. Fingers crossed I won't as we won't get to do the insemination bit then as we're not booked in but I guess me and husband can still have a go the old fashioned way.

My one funny thing from today was as I had to take my daughter with me (she's 3.5) due to no childcare she said loudly as we left the scan room "mummy what was that lady doing to your bottom?" 🙈 🙈

Fingers and toes crossed that we have a hatrick of pregnancies for us all this cycle. Last cycle I was super excited by the large follicles etc but I'm definitely more reserved this time around. X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey everyone

I am already in Copenhagen. The follicle was 24x15 mm today, so they wanted me here ASAP. I have my appointment tomorrow morning and will be flying back in the early afternoon. I will miss 1 hour of the wedding, but my brother was totally fine with it and really happy for me that I get to try again. 
I really, really do not like flying, so today and tomorrow are super stressful for me. I actually bought a beer here in the hotel to relax just a little bit. But stress down-regulates the immune system and that helps keep the little swimmers alive, so maybe that's good. 

Tracey, you're daughter sounds awesome!   I have everything crossed for you as well.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Ooohhh Phoenix this is exciting!!!! Good luck 
And you'll get to be at most of the wedding too... perfect.
Tracey glad you got through it with your daughter there, she sounds funny 
You two will be SO close in your TWW.
JJJ glad your course is going well so far. 
Has anyone heard from Matilda on any other forums? I really only check this one. 
Daisy xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hellooo

I think AF is going to start soon (early) it's s different feeling to last two months... because this month it starting is a positive... the start of a new cycle.  I was rather hoping it would be the end of next week though rather than the beginning.
I barely know my staff or students yet.. will be awkward to have a day off too soon. 
I know this is much more important.... but still awkward.
Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, it's annoying when it doesn't go to to plan isn't it. What cycle day are you on? Have you started spotting then or can you just "feel" it's on its way? I know the timing isn't great but I guess by already having told your team of what you are going through, hopefully they will understand or at least just keep quiet about it all! So this will be your first medicated round? X

P.s. My team don't know but I have obviously had numerous appointments this year and had a hospital appointment last Monday and another one this Monday. I'm certain they have their theories on what it's all about but no one asks me about it. X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Yes it's my first medicated iui. I had 2 non medicated.
I can tell period is on it's way as I'm getting stronger period pain and I get a different type of headache sometimes migraine... but it feels different to my normal headaches/migraines.
I'm on day 22, my cycles range from 21-29, usually around 25/25 days.
What's your job Tracey? My worry is that I have to leave planning for a planning and resources for a known absence, I don't know the students well enough yet (after just 3 days) to pitch it right. If I'm there I change the plan for each group as I go along but I'm not sure if my team would do that. In the grand scheme of things I have to think as long as they're safe and happy then it'll be fine. Apparently Ofsted can't come in first two weeks of term so don't need to worry about that.  Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Morning everyone, I'm just sat in the hospital cafe after having dropped my husbands sample off and just waiting now for the insemination. God I hate waiting! Last time I was so excited but I'm still feeling quite numb this time around. When I dropped the boys (stay warm little swimmers) off I didn't hear that someone had joined the queue behind me and I about ploughed into him as I turned around. It was quite funny as the guy was just avoiding all eye contact. I know it's awkward for the men in this situation but with all the poking and prodding we get I do think it's funny how the one thing they have to do is a bit of a drama. I always put the pot down my trousers to keep it warm (and have the heater on max heat so I'm sweating buckets) so I looked like I had a dodgy hard on. Just thought I'd share that 😂

How are you getting on phoenix, did everything go to plan for you? Fingers crossed for you this round.

Has AF started yet daisy? I get how it's so much harder for time off when you work in education, I'm just office based so the odd appointment here and there isn't a big deal really. X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Tracey
How was it?

No AF hasn't started yet... v frustrating. I've had on off mild period pain for an entire week now.

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy. So annoying that when you want AF to come it doesn't! Fingers crossed the wait isn't too much longer. How are you doing otherwise? 

Today went ok thank you. I didn't experience any discomfort last time when they did the insemination but I had terrible crampy pains this time and then on the way back to work. I'm therefore seeing the pains as a good sign! Got my pessaries this time too so look forward to a fortnight of gooey mess 🙊 I am now however feeling hopeful again, still with a mix of reserve but a bit of positive attitude can't hurt. Oh please let it be my turn!  

Phoenix do you have an update from your weekend? Hope we can keep each other sane! 

How was the weekend with your dad Jess? X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

At least it's over... keep positive.

I know this is probably asking for tmi but can you tell me how the pessaries work ...what causes the goo... sounds horrible.
I've read some things that say you take them rectally and some in the vagina .... can you still go to the loo once they are up? I'm nervous.

Also can you enlighten me about the injections...where do you inject yourself?

Thank youuu xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Ladies

Daisy, I can totally understand your frustration. Waiting is so annoying.   Keeping my fingers crossed that AF starts soon!!

Tracey, glad to hear it went well and that it's different than the last time. I am also comparing everything to my last cycle.

My weekend was really good. The journey on Friday was a little stressful since the plane was tiny and I am a little nervous about flying anyway. The IUI itself was awesome this time, because I had a different midwife (the chemistry with me and the one from my first IUI was just not right and it was all very strange)). This midwife first asked about my last experience and, I think, wanted to check my emotional state. W then talked about some difficulties with the first IUI that were caused by some strange anatomical peculiarities. My doc at home actually widened my cervical canal on Friday to make it easier. She was very happy about that and it actually worked within 3-5 minutes this time... last time took 15 min then 30 min of drinking huge amounts of water and then another 10 minutes.  
The whole experience was just really good and the midwife was awesome.  
My flight back was delayed 2 hours, which was very annoying and I ended up being 4 hours late to the wedding, but made it to dinner. My brother was awesome about it and totally happy, that we both made the most of our big life events. Absolutely love him even more for that!

I am not 100% sure that I did feel ovulation this time, but it might have been 5 1/2 hours after IUI, on the plane back, because I felt a really intense burning that even made me cringe, which could have been the fluid from the follicle being released. If that was it, the timing was really good.
The next morning I couldn't keep my breakfast down, which never happened before and I'm wondering if the HCG from the trigger could cause something like morning sickness? Does anyone know?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, you're right in your guess with the pessaries, they go up one hole or another 😱 the experience just gets better and better. I got told to do mine vaginally and the goo can leak out so make sure you have a stash of pads! I'm putting mine in at night to try and lessen the mess (not sure if it'll make any difference!) you can go to the loo as you push it up and back so I guess a bit like a tampon? It's the first time I've used them so somebody correct me if I'm wrong! As for the injections you can do it in your tummy or upper thigh. I went for the thigh. The needle is very thin, it doesn't hurt.

Hi Phoenix, glad the weekend went OK despite the stress with the flight, it's lovely to hear of your bond with your brother and the support you've shown each other 💛 I haven't experienced sickness or feeling sick after the trigger but with all the meds we're putting in our bodies I wouldn't be surprised if that was a reaction to it. Sounds like your timing was spot on though. And now we wait.... 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Thanks for the info Tracey.

Ohh Phoenix I'm glad it went ok and that your brother was supportive 

I probably shouldn't be, but I'm watching One Born!

Xxxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I just had to google what 'One born' is. Looks like a UK series?
I also tend to watch baby-related stuff on youtube during 2ww. It's a little like torture but also keeps me very hopeful.

I am also taking the pessaries. It's really no big deal. Just use panty liners.   The needles really don't hurt and also the fluid didn't burn under the skin or anything.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Ladies
How are you all doing?

Well my AF has eventually started... sort of.  It started yest morn but so far just dark brown watery and light.... so I can't call it day 1 yet,my clinic say to ring on day 1 of heavy bleeding.
It's pretty unusual for my period to start this slowly.... it's happened about twice ever... very irritating.

I was starting to jump to all sorts of conclusions when it didn't start. I was thinking maybe I got pregnant last time and that my (very heavy) last AF was just implantation bleeding! Ridiculous I know.

Love D xxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, has AF fully started yet? I know exactly what you mean with hoping a period wasn't actually a period, I find if I Google enough I find the answer I want (but it never turns out that way for me!) fingers crossed you can get started on your new cycle soon xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi T
Yep it's def started now complete with horrible headache and period pain. Tonight will probably be the night of flooding :-( (tmi sorry)
Night night xx 

Oh Forgot to say... going for first scan on Sat lunch time x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Lol Daisy, the flooding made me laugh 🙈 hope the headache and pains don't last too much longer. Good luck for your scan on Saturday, keep us posted on how you get on.

Phoenix will you have any follow-up over the weekend to check if you ovulated? Can't remember if you said if your clinic did that. I've got a blood test on Monday to check mine but luckily I'm off work anyway so don't have to explain anymore absences this cycle. X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey

Daisy, glad to read that things are finally progressing for you! Let us know how your scan goes!!

Tracey, how are you feeling? No, I won't get tested for ovulation. In the past 6 months (since I started monitoring my cycles) I have always ovulated based on BBT, luteal phase length and ovulation tests. Sometimes I even feel ovulation. This time I am not sure I felt it, but I definitely think I ovulated. Another reason to check would be to see if progesterone is high enough, but since I am on pessaries anyway, there is no point in testing.
Will you be tested?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Phoenix, it's interesting what you said about the pessaries as I'm on them this time but they've still told me to go for a blood test but I wondered if the pessaries would mess with it? 😕 I'm feeling OK, no symptoms or anything yet, I'm not in the obsessive stage yet, I look forward to that next week! How about you? X


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

How is everyone?

Daisy I hope your scan went OK, have you started gonal f now? 

How are you getting on Phoenix? Is your OTD less than a week away now? 

I've had sharp stabbing pains in my lower abdomen to the right the last couple of days so have obviously been obsessively googling trying to put it down to implantation 😵 we've been away this weekend which meant we couldn't DTD on the last day that we were advised to which I'm praying won't be our downfall this cycle. X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Tracey

really good to hear that you've had symptoms...   Hopefully that means what we want it to mean  

The midwife wrote the 24th as OTD on my information stuff. That would be next Sunday. I really, really don't want to test. It will probably be different next week and I will grow impatient, but on the other hand I just want stay inside my positive, comfortable bubble and not know anything. Even if it is positive I would obsess over line intensity or the Clearblue weeks estimator (last time I never got further than a "1-2 weeks"-reading, so I'm terrified this could happen again). Then I think it's best to know on Sunday and have a day to process before having to teach again. 

So, I don't know. I'll see how the week goes and decide then.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hello All
Phoenix, have you decided when you will test yet or will you just wait and see how you feel? A day to process does sound wise.

Tracey how are you.. any more pain?

I'm excited for you both. Also know the second week of 2ww will be agonising:-(

My baseline scan was fine. There were 16 follicles .. 14 of them tiny and one in each ovary at the top of the graph.

They really rushed everything and didn't get chance to explain anything... I would've totally confused as to what was going on if I hadn't have read lots on forums and asked you questions... so Thank youuuu.

I still don't really know much, but I've started the gonal f which has gone ok so far...and I have to go back on Thursday. 

Xxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Morning ladies 😊

Glad the scan went OK Daisy, sounds like you have a good supply there 🙋 hopefully your scan on Thursday will show nice big fat follicles, it's exciting! How are you feeling? I always find I have questions after (even after doing it a second time around!) which is why I end up asking on here or doing umpteen Google searches!

Phoenix I get what you mean about your little bubble. It's like if you don't test you don't know and there's still hope. I was planning on not testing for a good few days after but they've only given me enough progesterone to last until my OTD and have said I'll need to keep taking it during the first part of the pregnancy (if I get lucky) so I will have to test on the OTD as I'll then need to get more pessaries.

No more pains today and I've been running around like a mad woman this morning after going for my blood test. I'll see what the hospital say about my progesterone levels this time given that I'm taking the pessaries as well. X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Really hope that you're all well.

Sorry I haven't been around for a few weeks. Last cycle was Bfn and I took it quite hard 😔 which is my own fault for testing too early and getting that stupid trigger positive. 

I'm going to read through everybodys posts later and catch up on the latest 😄 hopefully when I'm at work on my break or probally whilst Im setting up my injection for later fingers crossed

Xxxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Matilda 💔 I was really hoping you were off celebrating, I'm so sorry. Hope you're feeling better now and you've given yourself plenty of TLC and treats to make you feel better (although I know it doesn't always make the sadness go away). So have you moved into IVF now or is this your last go on IUI? Take care lovely   xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

I'm all caught up now.. that was alot to take in 😊

Great news about your second treatment Tracey! Where are you dpi wise? Fingers are firmly crossed for you this cycle. You little girl aounds hilarious! I am intrigued though.. what did she do to your bum?? Lol. 🤔🤤🤣

Hi Daisy.. hope you are well? Good luck for this cycle. Sounds like your struggling to get answers / time to speak properly with your clinic. What I would say is take a pen and notebook. Before you go.. write every question down and that you want to know the answer to and sit there in the appointment until they are answered. 
I think I'm right in saying that you pay for your treatment? Its not blooming cheap.. you are paying for a service and you need to know every detail about the service you are paying for. Don't let them make you feel rushed, you deserve the answers to your questions.

Phoenix.. so glad you had a lovely time at the wedding, your brother sounds lovely 😍 very pleased you managed to have your treatment as well.. fingers crossed for you.

Hi Jess.. hope you are well? Glad to hear youve been making a start with your course. How are you feeling and what are your thoughts on future treatment?

AFM.. cd14 today.. 5 clomid and 5 menopurs in.. my last scan there were 3 follies on my left side. 11 12 and 14. So Ive had 2 extra menopurs this time so hoping they have caught up. Just sitting in the reception waiting for my scan 😮😮 xx

P.s also booked in for my IVF introduction session on the 10th October hopefully with a view of starting treatment late october - early november!! Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Matilda, welcome back. I've been wondering how you are. So sorry to hear about your BFN and how hard it was.
I'm confused... are you doing IUI again now but booked into ivf intro as a back up?
Yes I pay for my own treatment ... agghhh... and this is my last iui before I try an ivf ...... hopefully it won't get to that.
How was your scan?

Tracey I'm glad no more pain... I think that's a good thing.

Phoenix how are you?

Jess is teaching taking up more and more of your brain space by the hour?

I'm fine. Feel quite excited by and quite positive about this round. I feel like I'm actually doing something by doing the injections... whereas doing 'natural' cycles before there was nothing I could do.
No side effects yet. I have a really sore throats but don't think that's linked!

Xxxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Ladies

glad to see that life is returning to this group  

Matilda, so sorry about your last cycle. Yes, please let us know what your new plan is!

Tracey, how was your progesterone test? I am not sure if the blood test would even show elevated levels due to the pessaries. The pessaries are taking care of the progesterone very locally and might not even make it into the blood stream, so levels might be normal, or even on the low side. 

Jess, please let us know how you are. Hope the teaching course is fun!

Daisy, you sound so positive! I totally get the feeling of positivity associated with doing something. That is how I feel about logging BBT, OPK results, CM etc into my app.  

AFM, I am very much enjoying the tww. I'm positive and hopeful and like this feeling of everything-is-possible. But I also have a lot of stuff going on with school, which is better than last time, where I was on my summer break. I drove myself a little nuts then.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Yes sorry Daisy I didn't make it very clear.. I am doing my last IUI, triggered tonight at 10pm. My follies were 2 x 19 and 1 x 18.

And as a back up / next stage they have booked me in for a IVF information session so that I can move straight on if we need too. It's made me feel better that they suggested that to be honest.. it puts my mind at rest when they is a "next stage" as such. And as I say Ive been going through a bit of a lull (is that the right word? ) atm so it all helps to keep me smiling. 

Where are you at atm cycle wise ... I see your injecting? 

Thanks Phoenix 😚
Xx
Xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Phoenix, glad to hear you are positive too. Totally know what you mean about school taking your mind off things... there certainly is no time to dwell on anything.

Ooh Matilda, just triggered... so is your IUI today? Hope it goes well.

I'm only on day 6. The down side of doing medicated over 'natural' cycle is that it makes the cycle seem so much longer.... essentially it doubles the waiting time because you start actively doing things from day 1.  In my 'natural' cycles I didn't do anything at all before my IUI which was normally on day 14.

Have a good day everyone

Xxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Phoenix I wish I had your positivity it sounds bliss! I've been feeling quite low today but it was my first day back at work after a long weekend off so not sure if it's back to work blues or if I'm hormonal. Do you (or anyone else?) notice if your pms is the same when on meds? I'm due on in 6 days so could be moody because of that?!

Eek trigger last night Matilda so all set for tomorrow? It's great that you have your IVF appt set up ready so if you do need it (fingers crossed you don't) you then don't have a long wait whilst they set up an appointment. How are you feeling about this cycle? Your follicles are sounding promising 😊 I'm hoping the nurse didn't do anything to my bottom 🙈 I'm guessing that's just how it looked from my daughters angle (as far away from my feet end as possible! 😂) 

How are you Daisy? Not long until your scan now and yes I felt the same when I first did injections like I was contributing and hopefully making my odds better. 

Other than being a bit blah I've had no other symptoms, pains have subsided. I'm 8dpiui currently but not really thinking too much about OTD. I'm going to check in with the hospital on my progesterone levels but it's nothing to get too excited about as ovulating doesn't necessarily mean pregnancy (as we all know!) but I guess it's another tick in the box! Xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Sorry your feeling low T.

I don't know whether pms stays the same or not.

I know I could look this up, but I'll just ask. Why do they test progesterone levels? What does it show? Is this an extra test just some people have?

I've been feeling quite overwhelmed today by the amount of things I'm already behind with and are due in sch wise, yet no time to ever do them as need to plan and teach!

I don't know if injections are contributing to this feeling or if I'd have felt like this anyway!

A girl at school had her 3 month scan today. I am genuinely happy for her, but it's still hard.

Love to you all. Anyone watching Bake off?

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, my hospital always request a blood test a week after the iui to measure progesterone levels which apparently can then show whether I've ovulated or not. So if it's above a certain reading they're pretty confident that ovulation happened. I'm not sure if they just do it for their statistics as I'm sure Phoenix said her clinic didn't do it so I'm not sure it's a common practice.

I have friends and relatives who are teachers and I understand from them how heavy the workload is. How many weeks until October half term?!? 😊 I always find rescue remedy a good calming agent and it's safe to use if you're TTC or pregnant.

Sad to say I ditched bake off following the move the channel 4! I just can't be bothered with the adverts! I do like cake tho! Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Tracey,

my positivity is just a way of protecting myself from prolonged heartache. If I get a BFN I will be devastated and not in a good mood for a few weeks. I don't see any point in prolonging this, so I am forcing myself to think positive and not make myself miserable sooner than I have to. 

I can't say anything about PMS in relations to meds, since the only time I was on meds I was also pregnant. I don't yet know my pre-menstrual symptoms with meds and a BFN. 

Matilda, great to also have you in the tww. Good luck for this cycle!

Daisy, what kind of protocol are you doing? What's your clinics schedule for your treatment? Can you already estimate the date for IUI?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Your method makes sense Phoenix, I think my gloom is generally down to being bored in my job. Hopefully I'll be planning mat leave soon so I can bust out of this joint!

So had my blood results this morning and my reading was 61 which indicates ovulation. Previous readings I've had have been 34 (natural cycle) and 38 (last iui medicated cycle) which both of those indicate ovulation (I'm not sure what the minimum reading is for them to be confident that ovulation had occurred). So as this time it's much higher I asked the question about whether that is down to the progesterone I'm taking and the nurse said it could be or it could just be a better level of ovulation. Not sure that makes my chances any better this time but it's good to know ovulation happened I'm just praying that our little guys and girls hooked up 🙏

Hope everyone is OK, good luck for today Matilda xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

So sorry your feeling a little down Daisy.. I get very emotional on the gonal / Menopur so don't beat yourself up to much. Remember you're injecting hormones into your body so you're not necessarily going to feel full of the joys of spring. I personally get very teary and have hot flushes throughout the night when I'm injecting x

Hi Phoenix.. well done on keeping positive.. makes absolute sense and great you can feel that way ☺ Yes in the 2ww club as of today!

Hi Tracey... Sorry to hear your feeling a bit poop. Are you in week 2 now? That's always where I struggle the most. Keep going ☺ What were your follies this cycle?

Afm.. had my IUI today.. all went well. Hubbys post wash sperm was 46 million so that's good. Hoping that one of those little suckers can find one of my 3 follies! X


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Ooh Matilda
I really hope it works this time.

Tracey what is your job? Sorry you're fed up.

I don't really know what my protocol is...no one really had time to tell me.

I usually ovulate ( well high LH) on day 14 but I don't know whether gonal f will make it earlier or later.

I think I can feel my ovaries this eve. Not painful ... feels a bit like a full bladder but in a different place.

Have my scan tomorrow, not even sure what I'm looking/hoping for.
Can someone remind me what size I need these follicles to get to?

She basically said because I'm old she would go ahead with 3 or less follicles as the chances of them all working are slim.

Xxxxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Daisy 

What cycle day are you on?

The aim is to get your follies to 18mm+. They are then classed as mature and you can trigger.

For example.. by cd11 scan.. after 3 injections mine were 11mm 12mm and 14mm. I wasnt ready and needed 2 x extra injections.. on cd14 scan mine were 2 x 19mm amd 1 x 18mm xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Ladies
I'm confused. I just came out of scan. I have 2x follicles at 14mm both on left. All others are tiny.
I have to return on Sat for scan but she said to bring trigger injection with me in case they need to  trigger and iui on same day. I'm sure she said they could do iui within an hour or so of trigger. But most people I've read about have had to wait 24-36 hours.
Im wondering if they are fobbing me off because they don't work Sunday and only Sat till 12? 
I would think it better not to inject let follicles grow slowly and trigger when there's time to wait early next week.... but I am far far from expert. 
Also they had no record of what drugs and amounts they'd given me nurse went away for ages to find out but couldnt. Feels like a bit of a shambles.
Stressed now :-(
Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi Daisy, oh sorry to hear about this, extra stress is not what you need!   was there a senior nurse there or could you ring up and have another chat. You've only been injecting for 3-4 day right? So your follicles sound right on schedule but I agree that it seems a bit rushed. I haven't heard of triggering and insemination at the same time. I would have thought if you trigger on Sat evening you would go in on Monday. Perhaps because sperm can live for a few days they don't see it as a problem but personally you are paying a lot of money for this treatment you definitely don't want it to be slap dash. What dosage of gonal are you on? When I had my scan I had one follicle at 1.8 and two at 1.4 after only 4 days of injections, they did an ovulation test which was negative and they said it felt too early anyway as it was only cd 6 so they lowered my dosage to keep things ticking over but not to make it go too crazy (this was on a Friday so same issue with weekends) and I triggered on a Sat with IUI on the Monday. I had to check on the Sat I wasn't going to ovulate as well which I didn't. If you're feeling brave enough I would definitely have another chat so you don't feel on the spot on Sat. I would have thought as well they would ask you to do an ovulation test on Sat if your follicles are big enough and if that's negative you should be fine to trigger sat night and iui Monday. Sorry not sure if that helps I've kinda thought as I've typed. Xxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

I agree with Tracey.. try and obtain a second opinion.
I've had 1 x IUI 24 hours after trigger and 2 x IUI 40 hours after. Never heard of having it the same day as the average rule of thumb is you ovulate 36 hours after trigger.

Washed sperm has a shorter life span as well so I wouldnt be happy personally doing them both at the same time. Definately call for a chat and explain your concerns x


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Thanks for quick replies Ladies.
I'm on cd 8 and have done 5 gonal f injections of 50 ( not sure 50 what... can't be ml can it)
I think when I get home I will take your advice and ring them. No idea if the lady who saw me was a nurse/doc/ cleaner?!?
Just on bus back home from station and to make life more awkward the Dad of one of my last years pupils has got on. Don't think he's spotted me yet.... but I will get off stop before him then he's bound to see me. He's such an annoying parent too, I would not be surprised if he waltzed straight into sch to tell the head I am skiving.
😕


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

I rang and have spoken to another nurse... still pretty unclear.  Basically it's messed up because it's falling on a weekend.
I'm disappointed mainly because the timing is all messed up and not ideal, secondly because my appt on Sat is 9.50 so can't park run ( trying to reach a target of 50 before Christmas... I'm on 40, but have to stop for 2 weeks every time I have treatment.... obviously this target would go out of the window if I got pregnant as I would have WAY more important things to concentrate on), Thirdly because I was meant to be travellinh to Hull for the weekend to watch My bro in a marathon but now everything is so up in the air, with maybe having to wait around in London and go back later in day for iui, so I don't think I can.

I think the best I can hope for is that my follicles grow slowly and that they say to trigger Sun and iui Mon.

I tried to ask if it would be better to stop injecting to slow growth but she said they still needed to grow. Is this because if they don't grow enough and I ovulate they wouldn't be good enough anyway?

As far as I know there's nothing to stop me ovulating naturally before trigger is there? I normally don't ovulate until day 13/14 but I think this gonal f may bring it forward ( could that happen?)

Grrrr xxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Having trigger and IUI on the same day doesn't sound right at all. Like the natural LH surge the trigger doesn't trigger immediately. It takes 24-36 hours for the egg to be released after it. And, more importantly, frozen and thawed sperm doesn't live for a few days. It only lives 6-24 hours, so if the window of the two events isn't timed well, it's money down the drain.

No, you can still ovulate naturally if you wait too long. You you have ovulation tests? I always use them with every time I go in the last days before IUI to make sure I'd catch a natural LH surge.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

There's nothing I can do though is there? I can't make them open for me on a Sunday and clinic don't seem to think stopping injecting gonal f or triggering early is an option.
Only thing I can do is hope for slow follicle growth AND no natural ovulation...and that at Sat Scan they say to trigger Sun and Iui Mon.

I will also do ovulation tests at home morn and night and ring them if I do ovulate naturally


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

If your scan shows mature follicles on Saturday Daisy I would insist on triggering Saturday night for treatment Monday Morning.

You are paying for a service! Your clinic sounds absolutely dreadful.. no clarity, rushing your telephone appointments previously, rushing your treatment now.

I'd seriously reconsider your options for future cycles if you require further treatment after this cycle x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

I think you'll be fine Daisy I really do. You're on cd8 and your dosage isn't too high so I think you'll continue with steady growth until sat. Saturday is cd10 for you which would be early for you to ovulate from what you said? I think it makes sense to do your ovulation tests like you and Phoenix said and take one with you to your appt so if your follicles are the right size, you can test there and then for a surge. If there's no surge I think you'd be pretty safe to trigger Saturday evening with a view to do IUI on the Monday morning. It's hard when your arguing against what the clinic are recommending but I'd definitely push for a Monday appointment for the iui. I'm sorry this extra stress is not what you need xx

Lol well said Matilda! X


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Hey guys sorry for my absence! I've actually been in hospital, but before that the course was going well lol. I came home this afternoon and quite tired so am going to read all your news properly tomorrow. I was hoping there might have been a BFP whilst I've been away but having a quick glance I don't see one jumping out   Hope everyone is doing okay though and hanging on in there xxc


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Jess

Why have you been in hospital 😯??

Hows everybody doing?

2dpiui today.. not quite losing my marbles yet I am happy to report! Going to the Lake District tomorrow for a week so hopefully that distracts!

Had a bit of back ache but thats standard fot me after O.

Tracey and Phoenix.. How are you getting on.. when is OTD? 

No Jess no BFPs as of yet... xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi everyone,

Jess I hope you're OK?  

Daisy are you all set for tomorrow and ready to kick some ass?!

Matilda my OTD is Monday 😵 I didn't get this far last time so I'm taking each day as a blessing but am well aware the pessaries could be delaying AF so I'm preparing for it not to come and to have a BFN. I'm just not feeling that it's worked this time plus had PMT symptoms this week... I'll be put put of my misery in a few days at least. Break in the lakes sounds wonderful, I love it there. Hope you have a lovely time and the weather is kind to you xx

Have you tested yet Phoenix or are you holding out?  X


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Oohh getting there then Tracey. It is bloody torture especially with the pessaries. My AF has never arrived whilst taking them but arrives about 24 hours after I stop 🖓However fingers crossed that this time it does not show for both of us! 😊
Shame you're feeling down this cycle.. hang in there.. I know the 2nd week is awful but try and remember how full of hope you were when you were stimming and triggering. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Ladies,

first, Jess, what happened? Why did you have to be in hospital

And yes, Tracey, stay positive! PMT symptoms are often identical to pregnancy symptoms, because they're caused by the progesterone. And you have lots of progesterone floating around in your abdomen. So anything that feels like a backache, bloating, aching legs etc. doesn't mean anything. AF starts when progesterone levels drop, and as long as your taking the pessaries progesterone won't drop. 

Matilda, great to hear that you're enjoying the tww. Enjoy your vacation! 

Daisy, how did things work out with your clinic? Were they open to your questions?

AFM, I'm still going strong. I started to get a little scared of testing yesterday, but I'm better today. 2 more days for me. Will test on Sunday.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Ooohhh Tracey and Phoenix... you're getting so close to test date!!!
I'm getting excited for you.

Matilda I'll be joining you at the start of 2ww soon.

Jess good to hear from you. Sorry to hear you've been in hospital. Are you ok?

So I'm in London going for my scan at 9.50
I'm really hoping they'll say trigger tomorrow and iui Mon not all today.
I've decided to try not to stress about it, it's out of my control.

I'm really nervous about IUI as my last one was really painful... 15 mins of prodding .. I nearly fainted twice and had tears running down my face. 

Happy Saturday everyone

Daisy xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

How did you get on today Daisy?

Thanks Phoenix and Matilda for your words of encouragement, it's not over yet and all that! Good to hear your views on PMT symptoms with the extra progesterone. Are you testing first thing Phoenix? X


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey

so sadly it's a BFN for me. I honestly had the most conniving symptoms early on, but never felt pregnant. Very different from last time when I was convinced from the beginning that it had worked. 
I'm obviously disappointed because there is no end to this in sight. Who knows how much time (and money!) this will cost?
I am now looking into different donors, because I think I wouldn't have a good feeling with the same donor for the next round. The only positive thing is that I didn't have an early miscarriage this time so I don't need to wait one cycle. The downside is that I have my last mega-important exam 14 days from tomorrow, so natural ovulation and the stress of scans and booking travel accommodation would fall on the weekend before. 
I am trying to delay my period by taking the progesterone for another week. That might work, but there is no guarantee. If it doesn't work it'll be November for the next try.  

Good Luck, Tracey!


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Oh Phoenix

I'm so sorry.

I read this while I was out this morning and literally had to hold back the tears, I'm hugely disappointed for you. Sending a huge huge hug.

Afm
Follicles weren't ready on Sat so going back for another scan Monday morning. They're still talking about possible trigger and then iui with just a few hours in between.... so frustrating... I think it must be just something my clinic do. Very odd.

Daisy xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Phoenix

I also wondered about changing donor if next time doesn't work.

I wonder if certain sperm might just be more or less compatible with a person's eggs. 

Daisy x


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Oh Phoenix I'm so sorry   hope you're OK. It sounds like you're doing OK (as well as we can in these situations, it's certainly a test on our resilience) are you continuing with IUI or are you looking to move to IVF?thinking of you today.❤

Daisy glad to hear things weren't rushed for you this weekend and hopefully your scan on Monday goes well. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

I am feeling okay, I guess. It is not anything like after the miscarriage, so I'm relieved about that. I already found a new donor and bought two vials, so I'm good for two more months - October and November or November and December if things won't work out next month.
Having made that decision and starting fresh with a new donor is helping a lot because it keeps me moving forward and not dwelling on the BFN like it was last time with MC. 

Yes, Daisy, I have the same thoughts about some cells just not being compatible. I don't know why and I actually didn't look up the science behind this, but I just wouldn't have a good feeling to try again with the same donor.

Tracey, I am not yet moving to IVF. It is just too expensive for now since the clinic and my doc agree that me getting pregnant on the first try (even if it didn't end well) definitely showed that my body is ready for pregnancy and knows what to do. So I'd rather switch the donor first and then maybe make a decision about IVF after 5 unsuccessful tries. I'm not sure. I hope I don't have to make that decision. 

Daisy, glad you didn't have to agree to a rushed IUI yesterday. Still, strange thing with this clinic about having trigger and IUI so close together. I would definitely look into different clinics if possible.

Tracey, when are you testing?


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

So sorry to hear about your news Phoenix. I think you've done the best thing by getting straight back on the horse as such. I hope everything works out time wise for your next cycle. 

Hope tomorrow goes well for you Daisy, hoe big were your follies as of yesterday?

Goodluck Tracey for OTD.. fingers are crossed for you firmly 

4dpiui for me.. nothing to report.. few stabbings pains in my left side but that pure usual after every ovulation I've had that I can remember x


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi

Well done Phoenix v impressed you've been so pro active already.

I think my follicles were 10, 14 and 17mm but all so quick.

The scanning lady said 10mm one prob wouldn't contain egg but the nurse upped my gonal f in the hope that that one catches up?!?

I'm feeling quite attached to these little follicles!

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Sounds like you have a good plan in place Phoenix and I hope as well you don't have to get to the point to discuss IVF.

I too get the stabbing pains Matilda, hope they pass soon. When are you heading away?

Your follicles sound like they are growing beautifully Daisy and I know what you mean about forming an attachment, they are like your baby tho aren't they 😍

So I've had a bit of brown discharge this afternoon so I think it's game over for me. If "full flow" doesn't start before tomorrow morning I'll still test but I'm prepared for the negative. It's too close to my period for it to be implantation. I don't feel too sad about it at the moment but I'm normally worse when AF actually arrives as I know for definite then. I started filling the forms in for IVF this weekend anyway just in case so hopefully we'll have an appointment next month and we can decide where to go from there. Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Fingers crossed your 14mm catches up Daisy 🤞🏻How many injections have you taken this cycle?

Aw Tracey.. do you usually have spotting? What amount of progesterone are you on? Is it cyclogest? You are not out until she shows but I understand why you are feeling down... at least you now have a plan for the future.. and you're not as torn as previous cycles. However hopefully it will not come to that.

How funny about the stabbing pain.. I always thing how can this always happen and not actually mean that I am pregnant. The pain literally makes me lose my breath and stops me in my tracks.. only lasts for about 2 seconds though?

I'm here now 😄 been on a 6 miler today.. had a great time with hubster. My lodge is absolutely beautiful and overlooks fields and hills. The fields contain sheep, cows and baby calves 😍 xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Wow Matilda it sounds idyllic 😊 hope you've got your feet up after your long walk. I used to love going walking with my husband, you just find there's no distractions and you only have each other's company ❤

Yes I'm on cyclogest just one pessary a day. I occasionally have a spot or it's just the start of AF and gets heavier pretty quickly. Last month when I had my natural cycle I had a light spot and then nothing for about 24 hours. I do feel the universe plays cruel tricks on me sometimes. Anyway enough of the oh wo'est me..i was worried I wouldn't be able to cope with another fail but I'm feeling OK about it at the moment... I'll let you know if that attitude changes tomorrow tho! Xx


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Sorry to hear that there have been no BFPs I'm keeping my fingers crossed as always - sorry it wasn't a starter this month Phoenix, and fingers crossed its not AF Tracey  big hugs if it is. Well done Matilda, keep sane and no sneaky testing if you can help it! Good luck Daisy hopefully they will catch up! When are you due for your IUI?

As for me, I have some level of renal failure due to drugs I have been on in the past, and when I get sick (it was a stomach bug thing) my kidneys tend to just shut down so I had to go in, but I'm feeling much better now thanks everyone  

Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Just a quick message to say AF arrived this morning so at least I've not wasted a test I guess. Feeling a bit sorry for myself but cracking on with IVF enquiries to try and distract myself. Hope everyone is OK xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Oh Tracey 
I'm so sorry, that's such a huge disappointment. I'm in awe of how you and Phoenix are both dealing with this by moving on positively to next stage. Big hug to you.

JJJ poor you, sounds like you really suffer. Sending loads of love.

Afm I'm on train from Hull to London for scan at 11ish.  I got a smiley on my ovulation stick this morn so rang clinic to tell them. They said not to come in this morn but to trigger now and book iui for tomorrow. I said I was already on way to London so they said if I wanted to I could come on for scan anyway. I said I would.
Didn't really know what to do, but since I'm on my way I thought I'd continue. 

My worry now is that I'll get the nurse who seems to think it's ok to do trigger and iui within 2 hours even though no one else thinks that and that she'll want to do iui today.

Daisy xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

So sorry, Tracey. Do you know how soon you'll try again? Do you feel like you need a break from emotional rollercoaster before trying again? Or are you one of those people who feel best when coming up with a new gameplay immediately?

I feel best when I can distract myself with a new try immediately and block those negative feelings out. But last week just before testing I kind of knew why some people take the break. It is exhausting to wait and hope and analyse etc. 
But now I am back to the game plan. We'll see how long that works like this. I think at some point after too many disappointments it will get more and more difficult to stay positive.

Good Luck, Daisy! Let's hope they'll only do the scan and trigger and you'll have the IUI tomorrow. The timing would be really good then. 

Jess, that kind of sounds serious. Can I ask what you had to have the chemo for?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Thanks Daisy and Phoenix, I'm not doing anything this cycle as we haven't even had our first appointment with the clinic (IUI has been at the hospital but they don't offer IVF). So Oct is out and I'm wondering whether to wait until the new year as to go for IVF on Nov could mean a result before Xmas. Last Xmas I had a 43 day cycle that just messed with my head and although it didn't ruin Xmas it's presence was felt. I'm not sure whether to just take that time to enjoy my family, keep trying naturally and then crack on on January. But then the other part of me so desperately wants to be pregnant that if I could do it today I would! Feeling a bit   we took a month out after the first failed IUI as I was such an emotional wreck I couldn't have coped with getting back on it but agree with Phoenix that sometimes that helps. I am sad today but nowhere near the mess I was after my first failed cycle.

Good luck today Daisy, do you have to travel from hull to London for all your appts or was this just after the weekend? Fingers crossed you'll get your appt for tomorrow and not rushed for today.

Are you still taking your progesterone Phoenix with the hope to delay AF for your timings?

Jess I hope you're OK, you really pull at my heart strings it sounds like you've had your battles xxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

So sorry to read your news Tracey. All I would say is consider going a head with your introduction appointment... you're not obliged to then crack on straight away, you do have the option to miss a cycle. Do you know what the waiting list is for the initial appointment? My wait was four weeks. 

That way you have all the knowledge of what your specific ivf cycle will entail rather than googling and thinking of all the rediculas what ifs which we all do. You'll know whether they want to run you on a long or short protocol and you'll be able to take it from there planning wise.

Goodluck with your scan Daisy hoping for 2+ big follies.

Sounds horrendous Jess! You poor thing! Are you feeling better now or are you still having to take it really easy?
Ha.. I am definately going to not test rediculasly early this month! Completely learnt that lesson AGAIN last month 😮🤤 xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey Tracey,

yes I am still taking the progesterone but I'm not sure how well it works. I already have tiny traces of blood or brownish old blood so my period might start despite the progesterone. It could also be that this little spotting is because my own progesterone-source (the corpus luteum) is now gone and that means progesterone levels drop a little, which might cause the spotting. But since I am continuing with my high dose this spotting could be temporary. That's what I hope.

But on the other hand when I had the miscarriage I was of course continuing with the progesterone until we were sure that it's a miscarriage. So I though my cycle day 1 would be the day of or after I stopped the progesterone. But when I had a scan 3 days after stopping it I already had a 14 mm follicle, which would mean around cycle day 9. So my cycle started despite the progesterone.

Anyway, I just made an appointment for a scan for the day after my exam to see if there is anything there to use for IUI in October. If there is nothing there that day I'll just have to wait for November.


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## Sweetsonya (Apr 13, 2016)

Hi ladies

Hope you don't mind if I join the group. As you can see from my signature I have had IVF before and I also fell pregnant naturally in  May but miscarried early. 

My last IVF in July didn't go well at all so we decided not to do IVF again and moved backwards to IUI. The thought behind this was, tubes are clear after hysto and HSG, fell pregnant naturally so no issues there and both IVF's we have had 100% fertilisation so no issues on that front. So why take out the few eggs I do produce only to stick them back in 3 days later ?? My body really doesn't like being pulled around, the last IVF my estrogen went through the floor so we did 2 months of natural hormone monitoring that showed everything was fine.

So forward to today and I'm 6dpiui, I was on 50mg of clomid and added 75 Gonal day 7_8_9_10, I had 5 follicles as good as my IVF response on 450 combined Gonal/Menopur !!! On day of IUI Def 2-3 looked good and 1 ? Other 1 too small so we hoped 3 were mature lining was 9.2. I'm having bloods today and a scan for lining as I am still in monitoring mode and collecting shed loads of data for my consultant who is wonderful. I hope to see 2-3 Corpus luteum and have steady estrogen and high progesterone, last month mine was 84 so I have strong ovulation anyone else doing bloods during 2ww??.

I hope to test in 7 days but my period is like clockwork so never get to test on the day I'm suppose to 

Anyway I'm wishing everyone lots of luck and praying we see a few bfp on this board really soon xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Sonya

Welcome to our group.
I hope going back to iui works for you. It sounds like you have a whole lot of monitoring.

Perhaps we should all give you a quick low down of who we are and where we are.

I'm Daisy. I'm single... I'm 38.  I have done 2 natural IUIs with donor sperm... both unsuccessful and 1 medicated cycle for which I had IUI this morning.

Matilda.... keep resisting texting early... you can do it.

Phoenix and Tracey I think I'll be joining you in considering ivf if this round doesn't work.

So I had my iui today 22 hours after trigger.... which still seems a bit early but a lot better than the potential 2 hours that it could have been.
It was the least painful one yet thank goodness. 

I had 2 good follicles in the end.
So the 2ww commences.....

Xxxx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Daisy I'm pleased you didn't end up having the iui straight away, fingers crossed for you that this is your turn. 

Welcome Sonya, sounds like you've been through it, it's interesting how you've come back to iui, like you say if you can tell what is and isn't working and learn from it then hopefully it's one step closer to that baby in your arms. Did you have a break after your last IVF cycle then?

I've rang the clinic today and am booked in for initial appointment at the end of Oct. Part of me was thinking it would be great to do IVF before the end of the year but looking at timings I just don't think it's going to work. We've only got enough pennies to pay for one go of IVF so I'm happy to wait until the new year and we'll keep trying naturally until then.

Matilda hope you're feeling relaxed and happy whilst you're away.

Phoenix hope the spotting stopped and you're continuing to keep AF away x


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey everyone!

Sonay, welcome to the group. Interesting to go back from IVF to IUI... most women want to move quickly from IUI to IVF because they think the chance is bigger, so it's really cool to know that there are people who feel differently. Makes me think differently about IVF.
I really hope you're successful soon!  

Daisy, SO exciting! I so hope we get a BFP in this group soon... I didn't know you're also single and using a donor! I never realised we're going the same route! Awesome!  

Tracey, your plan sounds solid. Who knows? Maybe it works naturally. I think everything is possible!

AFM, the spotting is getting annoying and I think I won't make it much longer. But at least I tried, right? All I need is to delay ovulation by 2 days, so that we hopefully see nice follicles on the 10th, so I can trigger that evening and then comfortably drive up to Copenhagen the day after. That would be great.


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## justjazzyjess (Aug 1, 2016)

Sorry guys am so slow at replying! Thanks for all the love, its very kind of you  

Welcome Sonay! We are few, but these guys are the best! Im Jess - 26 and have premature ovarian failure, Im not having any more treatment just now (had my first failed IUI attempt over summer) but I'm still hanging around lol. I know lots of people do IUI to IVF but it sounds like you're thinking about this logically - which is exactly what fertility treatment needs as its no one size fits all. Your egg quality may be better on less aggressive stimulation which is a plus, and absolutely why take them out and put them back in (both of which can damage them!) if that isn't your specific problem. Everything crossed for you  

Phoenix - hope the spotting goes away and I hope things go to plan - Im still feeling a bit out of loops of everyones cycles lol but it sounds like you have a plan in action   I have a rare disease where my white blood cells attack my body type thing so it was for that, I'm still on meds (steroids/immunosuppression) but thankfully its not aggressive like it was before.

Daisy - glad to hear they did it properly, that sounded crazy doing it straight away! Glad to hear you've had your IUI, now the horrible wait. Try to take your mind off it as much as possible (easier said that done!) 2 follies is great  

Tracey - glad you have a plan and you sound positive - I know we were all hoping that you wouldn't have to make the ivf jump but the chances are so much better and new year new things hopefully hopefully hopefully!!  

Matilda - have a fab trip - you deserve it


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## Sweetsonya (Apr 13, 2016)

Wow thanks for the welcome ladies.

Daisy excellent going it alone, I hope the IUI is a success, what was your follicles sizes, did you check your e2 before or after trigger ??

Justjazzy, spot on I'm now thinking very logically and so is my consultant, stay positive for success even with premature ovarian failure I have heard of many success stories especially at your age, not sure if you have elevated FSH but mine was 27 the month I feel pregnant !

Phoenix, I think IVF is seen as the last resort and for some it's a massive help to get over certain hurdles, but if you know you don't have them struggles there's no reason why IUI shouldn't be an option, but I would always do stimulated iui to up the odds. I hope ovulation doesn't come just yet for you, it's nail biting at times !

Tracey, I had just 2 months off, which I just did cycle monitoring of my hormones, lining and follicles, all look perfect so cracked on with clomid and low dose gonal f, my response was brilliant, much better then full on stimulation.

What I've learnt, from my journey so far, I hope it might help some of you with decisions.

I started all this fertility treatment back in May last year and have learned so much, I jumped at IVF before IUI as given all the bad news I kept getting I thought let's just go full steam ahead...it didn't quite work out and my first Ivf got changed to an IUI in November bfn,  we learnt how I responded to stimulation and adjusted the next cycle,  this was followed by a good IVF in January but bfn, we learnt we had excellent fertilisation, very compatible apparently..lol... 

By this point the lessons learnt had cost a bit as originally I was with Guys ACU and fell out with them and there ridged approach, I had paid for scans, consultations, cancelled cycles before I moved onto an independent consultant who quite honestly shines far brighter then any major clinic I have visited. 

He refused to let me do another cycle until further investigations were carried out, he suspected I had some internal issues and he was right and corrected them in March, another shed load £££ of money, however first proper cycle after op I fell pregnant for the first time ever, so it was worth ever penny.

We raced on ahead to start IVF #2 with estrogen priming as my fsh wouldn't settle, unfortunately it was the worst of the 2 cycles, we saw 5 follicles but only got 2 eggs and 1 was cracked, other fertilised no problem but divided too fast, it was transferred day 3 but 7 days later my estrogen went from 2800 to below 60 I'm convinced  that's what contributed to the failure, we believe all the follicles flushing removed all the estrogen during collection as I should have had more eggs so flushing was needed, again lesson learnt, estrogen supplements might have been helpful in this situation..

We finally learnt that IVF which could result in just 1 egg wasn't for us...as we now knew from doing all the treatment that my tubes were clear, my uterus has no polyps or fibroids, the eggs and sperm are happy to dance and create embryos, it was a no brainer to continue treatment using IUI rather then IVF as my success rates are probably going to be the same doing either, if anything, IUI might give me better odds as my eggs are not being pulled around and are being left in the best environment, for me it's just a time factor and aging eggs, I'm doing my best to increase the odds for success in any given cycle and this cycle went very well.

I had a scan today that showed what could be 3 corpus luteum, bloods will confirm this tomorrow, 1 was 25mm, lining 9.5 was told it all looked very good and I saw 5 or 6 follicles on left 2 on right, cd20 I never see that many as I'm DOR.

So yes we have learnt loads and not about to give up, I hope not to do anymore IUI's but will do 2 more if necessary but let's hope this cycle is the one.

Good luck ladies fingers crossed xxx sorry for the mammoth download !!!!!



Me 42 DH 41 me no children.
2010 Cin III and cgin treatment, approx half my cervix removed, 5 years of minor complications
TTC 23 months, AMH April 16 3.5 !! 
HSG failed 11th May due to tight cervix
HSG repeated 22nd June  consultant happy.
1st IVF go ahead 08/07/16 - Cancelled 08/07/16 pm as admitted to hospital with acute tenosynovitis 😡
2nd IVF August cancelled day 3 FSH was 40 at start.
1st SIUI Nov 16 BFN but lots learned
2nd IVF Jan 17 5 follices 3 eggs 100% fertilisation without icsi. 2 x grade2 4 cell onboard 3 nothing to freeze BFN
Lap and hysto March 17 lots corrected
Shock natural pregnancy in May 17 m/c just over 5wks
IVF June bfn


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Phoenix your reply made me laugh out loud. I was struck by how similar we were weeks ago... as both teachers too. Maybe I didn't introduce myself properly.
What's your exam?

Matilda hope you continue to enjoy time away.

Tracey hope you feel positive now you've made the appt for talking about starting ivf.

JJJ are you well enough to get back to your course soon?

Sonya
You are so much more clued up than me.. I barely even understand your posts.
I think from what I briefly saw in the screen that my two biggest follicles were 21mm and 18/19mm. They were both above the all important line on the graph. They gave me the talk about how if it worked it could produce twins and did I still want to go ahead.  

Avoiding going to bed because really don't fancy starting the pessaries... eugh.

Daisy xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Daisy - Great news about your follies and lovely to have somebody else in the 2ww. How are you feeling? I'm 9dpiui and going strong, being away as really helped keeping my mind that little bit more active. I'll test 12dpiui and then obviously 14dpiui which is optimal test date.

Tracey - Thinking about you and fingers crossed that in the meantime you obtain a natural measure of happy news. Really positive that you have your appointment lined up though to discuss IVF. I have mine on the 10th.

Phoenix and Jess... hope you are both well xxx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

TMI, skip to next paragraph, if you want.   Delaying AF with progesterone doesn't work too well for me.   Spotting turned bleeding after 2 days and then light bleeding turned to medium yesterday, so I stopped the progesterone. Today is the first day of full flow, but I'm not sure if it is also cycle day 1. In theory follicles could have started developing the first day of spotting, since spotting is caused by a drop in progesterone. Or they could start on the first day of full flow, since progesterone was high enough to hold the full flow off and thus should have been high enough to keep FSH down. And if there is no follicle-stimulating hormone the follicles are not stimulated.   Let's hope for that.

My exam is the end of my practical teaching studies. I didn't study to become a teacher (Master of Education in Germany), but was a scientist before I decided to become a single mom. A science career is not compatible with being the only bread-winner of the family, so I decided to switch to teaching. Since I didn't have the Uni qualifications for that I needed to take a 27-months-course with 15 exams along the way, full teaching responsibilities and one big exam at the end. That one is one week from Monday. After that I have a tenured position and a 30% salary increase and am in a really good position to be a single mom.  

For now it looks like I might be able to do IUI#3 in October. I have an appointment for follicle measurements the day after the exam.  

Hope everyone else is well. 
Matilda and Daisy, enjoy the tww. 

Sonya, IVF sounds daunting... all the hormones and monitoring sound exhausting. Hopefully IUIs (or natural) will be the way for us.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi There
Matilda I'm pleased that going away helped... do you have any ideas how to take your mind off it for the next few days?
Phoenix I think it's amazing that you've changed profession and been through all that training to enable yourself you be a single Mum.... all at the same time as working presumably...wow.
I'm only 3 days post iui but in some ways it feels like forever. When I'm at school Its so busy that I don't think about it all of the time, but every hour or so I suddenly remember that a baby could be starting to form inside me.
Think the progesterone symptoms are becoming more obvious...My boobs are tender now and everytime I've been upstairs today I've been breathless.
It's really hard not to carry anything...I had to bring 6x full ringbinder files home in order to work this weekend.
Happy Weekend xxx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Matilda when is 12 and 14 days post iui for you? It must be soon.

My boobs hurt!

Xxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Daisy

I was away until last night so was very happily distracted. First day back at work today and now 12dpiui tomorrow, so although it is early, I will test. OTD is Wednesday. 

I've never had sore boobs on the progesterone. Natural cycles I get painfully sore to the point I've come to work once without a bra lol. Which is not something I would ever do! I did have a vest and jumper on so it wasnt obvious I hasten to add!

How are you feeling otherwise xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

How are you feeling about testing tomorrow? Will you test first thing?

I'm already panicking about testing on a school morning ( a week on Tuesday) then having to face pupils and colleagues. My first one landed on a weekend and second one was holiday time ( that time period started before my test date)

I've certainly got progesterone symptoms in addition to sore boobs; breathless going up stairs, dizzier than normal especially on waking, really tired in the evenings, random stomach pain... wS like cramps first two days but now more erratic BUT throughout my 2 plus weeks of injections and progesterone I haven't had a full on migraine... this is really unusual... I can only conclude that the hormones are good for me. I'd happily stay on them forever if it meant no more migraine because these symptoms are way easier to deal with than a migraine.... I can keep doing normal life... yey! 
I can see why you've ended up braless... i took mine off the moment I got in from sch some days last wk.

Right, best get back to writing personalised learning plans xxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Aww yes it can be crushing to say the least to have to put a brave face on when you test negative.

I don't feel like it gets any easier at all as time goes on but some cycles I definitely cope with it better than others. I'm not sure why? 

I'm just thinking that this time if it doesn't work at least I'm moving onto the realms of IVF.. which has always been where I've felt like I needed to go for some reason. I'm not sure why. I certainly hope I'm wrong though 🙂

Yep.. completely get the bloating and dizzy spells but as you say I've found it really helps with other things. It sounds like your migraines are awful so at least the progesterone is keeping them at bay! 

Fingers crossed you won't have to "face" any pupils this cycles Daisy.. hopefully this is the one for you and you can just to go work wearing a big smile x


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Thankyou very much.
Well I hope very much the same for you.
I'm really hoping this is the one for you and ivf isn't necessary. 
Will you let us know how you get on?

Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Yes of course, I shall update tomorrow 🙂 have a lovely evening xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Bfn again🖓 12dpiui today, will test tomorrow and Wednesday (otd). Just can't seem to catch a break! X


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

I thought of you this morning Matilda, sorry it was BFN, will you definitely test again tomorrow or do you think you can sit tight until weds? At least if it is negative (I'm hoping it's not) you do have your appt next week so hopefully this will help keep you distracted. Keep us posted xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

So sorry, Matilda. But it isn't over yet, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!

Daisy, totally remember the breathlessness. It is impressive what the addition of one hormone does to the entire body, right?

I just realised that this thread might be closed soon, because it's October now. I hope to see you all in the new thread!!!


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Thanks Ladies.

Tracey I could wait until Wednesday but the progesterone keeps all spotting and af away until I stop taking them. I take 2 x 200 pessaries morning and night.

I'll see what hubster thinks later re: testing.

But yes you are completely right, at least I have appointment lined up to get the ball rolling.  Did I read that you were thinking of delaying any IVF until next year? Xx


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

Ah I see Matilda, I only took one a day of the pessaries, do you have lower levels or is that a standard dosage?

Yes I'm not sure if we'll have time to squeeze an IVF cycle in this year. By the time we have our appt we'll probably be looking at my November cycle but when I worked out dates it could be that I'll be testing the week before Xmas. I just don't think I'll be able to cope with it if it doesn't work so close to the holiday. I've been feeling quite down the last God knows how many months (as you do) and my resilience is wearing thin. Also I don't want to feel like I am rushing into it and I know with some clinics there's a cut off for Xmas anyway. Will you want to start straight away? How many cycles will you have funding for? Xx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Tracey,

Funding for just the one cycle.

Yes I've heard about the Christmas Cut Off, i think this is usually for a deep industrial two week clean - I am told.

I'll definately be starting treatment as soon as possible. The thought of another Christmas without being a mum / being pregnant breaks my heart. We've been trying for two years in December which is am incredibly long time. 

Don't get me wrong I'll be devastated if it doesn't work but at least I can end the year knowing I did all I can this year to make a baby.

Its funny how we are in a similar situation re: treatment but see things differently in regards to timing. The thought of watching my 5 nephews and neices opening their presents and me and hubster being the only ones childless again just is unbareable.

I completely and utterly understand your reasoning for wanting to wait though, it would be a very very sad time to greave for what could have been.

Re: the progesterone thats the standard dose as far as I am aware. My progesterone was 50 last time it was checked so pretty good. Maybe something to query at your next apt? Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

Hey you two

I am also taking 2x200 of progesterone. My doc said that you can't overdose on this and with that amount it's safe to assume that progesterone won't be the issue if something goes wrong. 

I'm with you on the timing thing, Matilda. When I lost the pregnancy in June one thing that really got me, were all the events (like my brothers wedding) I would have to sit through without being pregnant... of course my own fault, since I was overly optimistic, but still. 
Last year I made the decision to go for it this year between Christmas and New Years, so of course my best friend said, how amazing to think that you might be pregnant next New Years and we might not be able to drink.... So now the thought of not being pregnant by then makes me dreading the holidays.

And I am also kind of losing hope (I know, pitiful after only two tries) and getting tired of constantly worrying that anything I put in my body (or don't put in my body) could influence egg cell quality. I'm honestly questioning everything I eat and drink. And I'm annoyed by that. If it was because of a pregnancy it would be much easier than just doing it because I might have an IUI this month and that one might be the one that works.


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Oh Matilda
I'm so sorry that it was a BFN
Don't give up hope yet... although I know from past experience how much your heart and hopefulness dips when you test eArly and get a negative. 😕😕😕😕🙁🙁

I'm only on one 200 progesterone per day too.

I'm feeling negative today, feel like this cycle won't work and really I can only afford one more.

I wonder how the other Tracy is doing, the one who got a BFP... I feel we need her to pop in and give us some positive vibes!

Xxxxx


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Yes Phoenix, my thoughts exactly in relation to family / special events. Out of interest do you still use the same egg donor which you fell pregnant with before?

I'm just really hoping I can squeeze pre christmas treatment in otherwise I'll be very upset.

BFN again this morning, Otd tomorrow but I know already it hasn't worked. I can just feel it, feel a bit numb about the entire situation this month. 

Hi Daisy, bless you. Try and keep your chin up.. hoping you feel a little more positive today.  How many days past IUI are you now? Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

So sorry, Matilda!  

I am only using a sperm donor (own eggs), and no, I switched donors for the next try. Since the first try ended in miscarriage and the second didn't work at all, I wouldn't have a good feeling about the next try if I didn't change anything. I know that about 25% of early pregnancy end in miscarriage and that other people would just think their period was a little delayed, so technically it doesn't mean that anything is wrong with the donor or with me, but I just feel better making the switch.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Sorry Phoenix, I meant sperm! Heads not in the game today. Oh I see.. I just wondered as heard a lady talking at work who is in a same sex marriage, they brought a large stock of donor sperm and have 4 children between them (they have both given birth) from the same sperm. Amazing. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

In the beginning I also thought that I would ideally like to buy 10 or more straws at once, just to make sure I would have enough for siblings in a few years. Now that getting pregnant for the first time is not as straight forward as I would have liked it to be, I am glad that I can easily switch if I don't feel it works. 
But once I do get pregnant, I will definitely buy more straws from that donor, because I would like my children to have the same donor. I don't think it is important for them to be 100% biologically related, but I'm worried that there might be different responses if they do decide to reach out to their donor once they are 18 and one donor would be totally happy and open and the other might not be so happy or might not even be alive by then etc.. I can imagine that this might be very difficult. So I think it is best for both/all of them to have the same donor and the same experience later on.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Yes that makes absolutely perfect sense to me now you've explained it like that. I suppose, heaven forbid, if siblings ever required bone marrow, a transplant etc the odds may well be better too of a match if they are 100% biologically related.
I imagine it would be very heard for siblings if one donor was happy to have contact and another wasn't - makes perfect sense to cut out that possibility as you say xx


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## Daisythesnail (May 1, 2017)

Hi Ladies

Thinking of you Matilda.

I would also ideally want siblings from the same sperm ... but think my idealistic ideas about doing this successfully 2/3 times are probably not realistic.

I'm still feeling quite down in the dumps (as most of us are) and negative most of the time but then every now and then I have a glimmer of... maybe this round is working.

My face is REALLY itchy. Must be progesterone as nothing else has changed.
I looked properly at my box last night, it's 400 not 200.

Suppose I should go to work.

Hope you all have at least one good thing happen today xx.


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## Matilda30 (Jul 5, 2017)

Hi Ladies,

Official BFN this morning on optimal test date.

Not really sure how I feel athough I'm sure clarity will strike when AF shows.

Hopefully some goods news comes on this forum soon for you all, my fingers are crossed for each and every one of you. Xx


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## 63smc (Feb 13, 2017)

So sorry, Matilda. It's kind of strange that it didn't work for anyone of us... sometimes you see threads with multiple BFPs in one round and then there are some months with only BFNs  

How long are you supposed to continue with the progesterone?


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## Tracey1409 (Jul 29, 2017)

I'm sorry it was negative Matilda, hope you are coping OK. Sorry we've all been feeling so negative/low lately. I got ****** at the weekend, staggered home and worked my womanly charms on my husband who was just grateful for the opportunity to have a play with my boobs for a change 🙊 sorry just trying to find a funny story to bring a smile to anyone's face. 💛💛 hope everyone is OK and Daisy and Sonya you are keeping well in your 2WW. much love to everyone xxxx


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## starmaker78 (Aug 5, 2016)

Hi everyone,

Its been a while since I was last on here and there's certainly a few new names that I don't recognise, so hi all! I've had a quick read through some of your posts and I'm really sorry that there's been very little success over the past months, it really is frustrating that we're all thoroughly miserable at the minute! 

Since I last posted we finally managed to have our first medicated cycle of IUI with our new donor, but got our BFN while on holiday. It didn't help that we took the test on our second last day and my partner had been avoiding alcohol and caffeine the whole time we were there, so she was not a happy bunny on all counts! We've managed to push straight into another cycle and are on our 4th day of injections (75iu of Menopur) and are getting scanned and bloods tomorrow morning. My big worry is that DP may over respond again. First time round they started her on 75iu, but had to cancel the cycle due to a crazy amount of big follies, yet last time there was barely a response after 7 days @ 50iu. Only when they up'd the dose back to 75iu did things slowly start happening (15 days on injectables in total), but even when we triggered, the biggest follie was only 15mm (too small in my opinion, but they were happy with the way her E2 was rising).

I've tried to be realistic about IUI success rates etc, but its a real kick in the teeth that it worked first time for us and then we lost our boy at 16 weeks. Its almost been a year and its getting me down big time. It also didn't help that my sister-in-law announced last night that she was pregnant again after deciding recently that they weren't having any more! Life really does suck!

Quick question regarding the progesterone pessaries. I know it can cause constipation, but did any of you ladies experience this after stopping taking them? TMI, but DP has been having 'issues' these past two weeks, yet was fine during the 2WW!

Hope everyone is holding up OK today.xx


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