# getting more difficult to cope with.



## pmc (Nov 15, 2010)

I found out this morning that I am a great aunt again!!!! This is now 9 great nieces and nephews in total. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for them on having children. But I feel such an ache inside me, that my nieces and nephews are having kids before me. At the moment I can't see it ever happening for me and my DH.
Also, 4 of my close friends are also pregnant. Don't know how much longer I can put on a fake smile. Everyone thinks I am coping really well, but I'm not.


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## MrsRTodd (Mar 26, 2012)

Hi PMC,

I know exactly how you are feeling, Ive been finding it all quite difficult over the past few months, my husband and i have been ttc for over 5 years and undergoing endless tests and hospital visits its all reached a climax and I start down regualting on 16th April, although this is a really exciting time for me, im finding that my feelings and excitement are over shadowed by the fact that, a. my best friend is pregnant and blooming at the min - due to give birth in july so everything at the moment is movements and everyone wants a feel, then my cousin is also expecting and has her 20 week scan to find out tomorrow and everyone wants to know about that and then finally my 18 year sister has just announced that she is also expecting (having been caught whilst on the pill!!!) so when the family all find out about that - thats also going to be the topic of convesation.../ and to top it all off she has her scan on 16th april the day that im starting my injections.


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## pmc (Nov 15, 2010)

Ah MrsTodd. Its a very difficult journey we are going through. Nobody knows how it feels. They can try to be understanding, but they never fully do. Only if you have been through it yourself. It can feel quite lonely too.

Thankyou for your reply and kind words. I wish you all the luck in the world, that one day soon, you will be the one showing off your bump, and that all the heartach that you have been through, will be worth it all. x


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## Helen3 (Dec 2, 2010)

To both of you,
I have been there when it comes to feeling so empty, grief-stricken & thinking that maybe I will never be a parent. It is such a tough & long-winded journey & I hope everyone on FF will give you both the support you need. If you look at my signature, we got our BFP in the end. I am now almost 27 wks pg but still get nervous that something might go wrong (but try to dismiss these negative thoughts from my head). As you say, I really don't think anyone who has not been on this journey can possibly understand, however well-meaning they might be. When I discovered the support from FFs it was a godsend, & it has really kept me going, as well as all the invaluable info & advice there is here too. I hope I am helping to give you both hope. It took us almost a decade to get this far. 
Wishing you all the luck in the world & understanding from others
Look after yourselves &   for your BFPs
x


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