# Lack of recipients???



## cfh (Jun 9, 2008)

Hi Girls

I wonder if any of you is in the same situation as me. 

I registered for egg sharing (May 0, all my blood results came back OK and waiting to be match. They said they could match us within a week but we have been waiting for over a month now. 

I rang the clinic today and they said that they have had lots of donors and managed to cut the recipient's waiting list and no one that matches me (Brown hair, brown eyes, 5"3). 

Is there not a shortage for donors I find it difficult to believe that there is no one out there needing my eggs.

I'm so far happy with the clinic but I don't really want to waste any more time. What shall I do?

Thank you in advance.

Cx


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## vikki75 (Nov 14, 2007)

hunnie wat clinic you at?? my clinic matched me b4 i even knew i could eggshare (b4 my bloods)
vikxx


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## *~Nic~* (Aug 1, 2005)

Cristina - thats hard one to answer - they would want to match you to someone who matches your cmv status (either negative or positive - one is more common than the other so waiting list is longer for one type but cant remember what way round it is) as well as you looks (not sure how far they go with this though? should imagine its build, height and hair colour type things)

Are you sharing at a busy clinic? May be worth getting the ball rolling elsewhere if your current clinic cant give you a time scale.

Some recipients will have stipulated an age range for the donor they are matched with also.

I shared at the Lister and was always matched really quickly but I am in the rarer cmv status so they had a longer waiting list for people waiting for my eggs - i am also Mrs Average! Average height, frame, hair colour and eyes. 

Good luck! Sounds like it may just be your clinic being successful with their egg share scheme and being on top of things.

x


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## cfh (Jun 9, 2008)

Hi Girls

I am at CRM London, a relatively small clinic. I will wait a month and if it doesn't work I'll move to the Lister (this was our second option). 

I'm just dissapointed because on our initial meeting with the consultant they told us approx 9 weeks from start to finding out pregnancy and it has not happened. 

Thanks for your replies! 

Cx


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## watn1 (Mar 14, 2008)

Evening,
  I was matched twice in the same month and at the clinic i am at there is a 2 year waiting list   I am CMV+ if that helps at all, As like Nic says one is rarer then the other... Hope you manage to get sorted soon.x


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## PiePig (May 16, 2007)

took about 3 weeks when i was matched...i;m also brown hair, brown eyes 5'2......maybe there are too many of us lol!


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## Just a girl (Mar 6, 2008)

Hiya CFH
My sil is at the crm london and was matched within a month (I can't remember how long exactly)  I am cmv negative and was matched in about 2 weeks at the nuffield in woking, the nurse explained to me that if you are cmv negative you can be matched to anyone but if your cmv positive you can only be matched to people who are also cmv positive! Im sure it is the cmv neg that is more unusual!  Good luck, I hope you get matched soon


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## watn1 (Mar 14, 2008)

Maybe i was Negative then....   I don't know now


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## *~Nic~* (Aug 1, 2005)

CFh - must be very frustrating for you!

Good luck and hope it all happens very soon     

I really cant remember the whole CMV status thing but I know whatever my status was was great for getting matched  

Nic

P.s cant recommend the Lister enough...they are brilliant!


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## *~Nic~* (Aug 1, 2005)

And I thought I was Mrs Average - obviously thats you lot!! (I am not 5'4 or brunette!)

CFH - October not that far away...unless they were talking end of october rather than start of.....did you book in to see them - at least have it booked as a back up plan incase its needed?

Agree with Katie about the not pestering!

x


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## veng (Mar 10, 2008)

i am blonde 5'2 i was matched with in the mth too but i am waiting till sept due to hubbys work,i hope you get matched soon


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## Caz (Jul 21, 2002)

Regarding the CMV thing. The guidelines state that CMV+ donors should only be matched with CMV+ recipients but a CMV- donor can be matched with either so, if you are CMV- then you have a wider pool to match to. However, I know my clinic (The Lister) "got round" that and offered CMV+ donors to CMV- recipients with their knowledge and consent... I don't think the  HFEA were very happy about it though! 

Do you know what your CMV status is? 

The only other factor might be your blood group but I don't think having a different blood group to your recip is an issue in terms of compatibility  - unless the recip. specifies they want the same blood group as either her or her partner and I can't imagine everyone on their books being that particular.

I egg shared 4 times and, from the moment I called to say I was ready to go, I got matched pretty much straight away and certainly inside a month for each of them. I had only one delay and that was because the chosen recip wanted to delay tx to fit in with lifestyle and then, it was only an extra month of pill popping for me. Actually, the last cycle, I started pill popping before being matched in anticipation and ended up curtailling the pill popping after 14 days (instead of 21) because they found me a recip. that quickly!
Incidently, I am another brown haired, brown eyed shortie (5ft 2) here.  

I can't imagine any clinic has cut their DE waiting list that much that you'd wait more than 6 weeks for a match! Mind you if it's a small clinic maybe they don't have too many DE cases. I know the Lister do have a lot of donor patients so maybe you'll have better luck there (  you'll have a match before then though).

C~x


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Hi everyone

sorry to crash your thread but I just wanted to pass on some positive words.

I am also egg sharing at Coventry CRM and have been waiting since the first week of July for a match. I now have a match and we're all go for ivf later this month. 
My lovely Nurse said yesterday that they have never ever been in the situation they are in now but they have more donors than recipients. I too am brunette and 5"8......maybe if we dyed our hair   

Good luck to you all  

Jo xxx


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

ps. 
as you can see from my ticker at the bottom of my profile it's been over 3 months since our first egg share appointment.....crazy  

Jo xxx


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Cristina

Brilliant....that's great news   How does it work if the recipient is abroad? do they have to travel here? 

I bet we'll be starting around the same time. My next af is due on the 19th Sept so they've said we can start then   
I've just been ringing round all today getting quotes for my drugs.....nightmare!

Take care
Jo x


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Cristina, 

Yeah I studied that thread for about 2 hours   That's where I found the pharmacy I got the best quote from.

Are you nhs or private?  

I should know tomo for definate what date we're starting, so I'll be sat by my phone all day again  

Jo x


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## shon1982 (Jan 3, 2008)

Hiya, 

Sorry to crash your thread.

I am/was with the CRM London and I am pleased to say that I am now 9 weeks PG. Hang in there as they are a brilliant clinic. The one thing that I did find though is that you need to keep calling them. Don't worry about pestering them. Who is your cons Dr Yeong was mine and we found him to be amazing, I promise you that once you actually start treatment the level of service and care is brill. 

I was matched like vicki, before they even had my bloods back. Then they found out that I was a CF carrier, so the recipients DH and my DH had to be tested. We weren't sure that they were going to go ahead as I carry the  CF gene. But they did. 

We were elated and desperate to start tx, then 3 days before we stared they delayed by one month due to "lifestyle" commitments. I did loose the plot at this point and I said that if she didn't go ahead as planned the following month then I would pull out. 

Funily enough everything went like clockwork following that !!!!! 

I created 32 eggs and so donated 16 to the recipient and I kept 16 and I am now PG. 

Looking back on it all it seems  to have happened in a flash and I really can't believe how stressed out and worried I was .... and now it seems that it was all a waste of time - there was no point stressing.

But do call them. Ask to speak to Paula or kate and explain that you are planning on transfering unless there is some movement pronto - but I do hope that it doesn't come to that.

All the luck in the world for you starting tx soon.

Shon and bean xxxx


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## shon1982 (Jan 3, 2008)

Silly me - I have now read the rest of the post and congratulations Cristina on having found a recipient !!!! It's a rollercoaster from here !!! 

All of the drugs are free the whole way through at CRM - apart from cyclogest (if you do fall PG) which you will need for a further 8 weeks. Your DR can prescribe this on the NHS or you can buy from CRM for 16 / week. So bare that in mind.

Also when you attend the clinic for EC they say it is best if you drive in - speak to the man in the lobby and for £5 he will reserve you a space outside - which is a lot cheaper than parking and the NCP all day !!! Just a little tip !!!! 

I am so pleased for you - keep positive and I am sure it will be good news for you 

Best of luck

Shon x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Hi Shon & Christina,

I'm so pleased that I've found you both (I'm not a crazy person!!)  Been hunting around the site desperate to find fellow CRM patients.

Me & DH have our first consult on Friday for ES with Dr Yeong & I actually feel sick with nerves - although spoke to him on the phone and he seems lovely - Is it me or does ES feel like the PE line-up at school?! "Pick me.....pick me!!!!"

Shon "Congratulations on your BFP" first try? Show off!! x x & I love your parking tip.

Christina - fantastic news on a match. How long did you end up waiting for your match? Judging from this I'm fairly average Brunette & green eyes 5ft 4". Here's a daft question......Do they take other family characteristics on board? Just I come from a real mix of blondes, dark and height? 

Claire x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

Thank you so much, it's great to find someone who's going through this and to vouch for the clinic. 

To be honest I'm glad the process takes a while, it'll hopefully give me time to take each step on board.

I'm very spiritual & believe in fate, signs and all that  (hubby laughs at me)!! You got your match confirmed on my birthday 2nd Sept, so it's gotta be a good sign?! 

I'd love to know if all's ok, once you get started on treatment, so that I can send you good thoughts and wishes x x Good luck  

Claire


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Hi everyone  

Hope you are all getting on well with your treatment and are not hanging around waiting for the phone to ring like me  

I want to join you all in London now, I feel all left out being the only one at Coventry CRM  

Anyway I just though I'd pop in and say hi, but as I'm at work I really best dash (naughty me)

Take care all and lots of luck   
Jo xxx


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## cfh (Jun 9, 2008)

Hi Girls

Hope you are all well. 

Called the clinic to let them know that af is here, but still no news from recipient. =(

Claire Thank you for your wishes. Best of luck on friday and let me know how it goes. 

Jo Have you been given a start date yet??  I've been waiting for the phone to ring since July and I don't like it! 

Shon Hope you are well and enjoying your pregnancy. 

I will keep you updated. 

Cx


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

I'm sorry your recipient can't seem to pull her finger out of her **** (you'll get used to me, I'm blunt and to the point!)

I really wish I had some great words of wisdom, that'd make you feel less disappointed, but my suggestion is:_

Dust off your best heels and most foxy outfit and get that man of yours to take you out this weekend, get you drunk, commit crimes against dance, stay up till 3, eat a really bad burger on the way home.......Do all this and tell yourself "This is my last blowout, before I'm pregnant" 

x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

Hope that you're well and keeping your chin-up   and not getting too stressed   !!!!

Appointment went well, You're right Dr Yeong's really nice, he did the standard medical questions, took about 12 pints of blood (that's what it felt like) and did a scan.
Asked us to get both mine and DH's CF test results from our GP and said we should get all mine results from them back in about a month. 
I did ask the time scale before treatment's likely to start, he said Jan at the earliest. So as miffed as you're feeling that it's dragging, you're fairly on schedule. 
I was impressed by clinic, all seems very nice. Although there was quite a bit of building work going on in the next room which DH said was probably Egg Collection!!!! DH thinks he's funny!!
One thing I did read up on is that Acupuncture is supposed to be helpful for calming and helping with stress, I'm going to book myself into a local guy who's meant to be very good - Maybe you could give something like that a whirl whilst you're waiting for your next AP date? Might help with the anxiety you're feeling? Just a thought. 

Keep positive  

Claire x x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

I'd definitely go with an NHS backup if it's there for you. You won't need it of course as it'll work, but it'll help thinking you've got other options.

I'm slightly annoyed for you that your recipients taken her own sweet time, surely they must have others waiting? And could just rematch you? I'd be worried that another month could come and go? 

You have to start yours before me, so you can be my teacher! I'll def try the acupuncture then, every little helps and all that. 

I'm gonna use my few months waiting to get on a diet and shift a stone, Dr said BMI (24) was fine, but we all know how weight creeps on! I think it'll give me something to obsess about that's not the treatment. 

Oh, did you have your bloods taken there, by a (I think) polish nurse? I give blood & I  hate needles. But I think she inserted that needle with fairy dust! Didn't even feel it, very impressed indeed. If she's showing how to do my own jabs I'll be happy, what a talent.

Better go, get dinner on!

Keep me posted on your news, Claire x


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Christina
Please forgive me if I get anything wrong as I really have to rush this post.
Hiya hun, sorry it's taken me forever to reply, my internet at home is not working and you know what BT are like.....not quick to fix the problem shall we say    
I've been given a date     I start down regging on the 9th October, day 21 of my next cycle. Have you heard anything yet? I really hope you have hun, cause it's blooming awful sitting waiting for the phone to ring all day every day  

Claire, just wanted to say Hi to you and send you lots of   thoughts.

It sounds as if we may all be cycling around the same time......is anyone else really frightened about the injections? I've got my needles at home now etc and it all looks soooo complicated and scary  

Anyway, I'll be back as soon as I can, I think my Mum is getting a bit annoyed with me hogging her pc all the time  
Take care both and sending lots of   to you

Love Jo xxx


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Hey Ladies,

Christina, 
I can feel from your typing how totally p'ed off you're feeling.      

Me & DH went through the same timewaste with our local NHS. They told us that as I've already had DS, then my DH who actually has the fertility problem isn't entitled. I do think that it's wrong, it's often a postcode lottery as well as to wether they'll help. They can assess individual cases which could be why Dr sent you there.

If you're truly not happy with the speed of the treatment at clinic have you looked at any other local clinics that will do an eggshare scheme? Travel abroad could end up pricey? & to be fair, the time it would take to go through all their tests and await matches, may take even longer?
I do understand that it's so frustrating, and without upsetting the applecart, we're both in our 30's and it feels like times a ticking?!!

Keep your chin up and positive, positive thinking, it will happen, just don;t let this waiting get you down  
Jo, 
Hi ya, nice to talk to you. Pleased that you're be getting underway soon, how exciting........suppose you'll be doing all those naughty things - like drinking before you get started!!! (I know I'm gonna) 
From what I've been told from all these FF ladies, the injections really aren't that bad, it's the anticipation that is worse. I'm a baby, I hate needles so you have my sympathy. But, you'll be fine and it'll be so worth it when you see that BFP!!!  

Claire x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

What a truly crappy hand you've been dealt recently. I agree where you.re coming from with Lister, it's starting from scratch and probably won't be any quicker and with waiting for a recipient etc. At least by going abroad I can see your point, you're not delayed by anyone else. I'm only happy to wait the few months we've been quoted (we'll see!!) as I need the time to prepare and I wanna get a lil nest egg put away in case things don't go as planned and it takes a few shots. 

Tests went ok, had to have my CF redone as the good old NHS lost my results that we had done a couple of years back. Go all DH's bloods done on Friday, he's a fainter! God love him! I have no faith what so ever that he'll be much use at all with my treatment! But the thought will be there!
We've been told it's about a month for all my test results to come back, and at the mo I'm just worrying that they'll be ok, I'm more worried about my FSH levels, I'm 33 and I guess I'm worrying that I've left it too long. I already have a DS who's nearly 5. 
I'm also worrying that my CF could come back positive, and then we're screwed. I just have to keep a PMA and forget about it for a few more weeks.

This whole process just feels like one hurdle of worries after another, I think it's all starting to dawn on me that this is gonna be a long and stressfull process. Do you ever worry that you just won't be strong enough to get through it? I've read some of the boards and it's heart breaking and so unfair to see what our fellow FF's are going through.

It's great news that you can possibly get going in October, fingers and toes crossed for you x


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## ClaireD1975 (Sep 7, 2008)

Christina,

16th October.......WooHoo...... 

That's fantastic news, you deserve this, with all the stress you've been feeling recently, I'm so pleased that you can get moving so fast.

I know how easy it is to say, but try not to worrt too much about jabs - Just think "Big Brave Dog!!" 

I'll be thinking of you and hope that it all goes well     

Keep me updated & I'm crossing everything for you.

Claire


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## vinnievinster (Feb 12, 2008)

Hi there

I wonder if someone can help.  I was diagnosed with prem menopause in January and have since tried egg donation.  The first resulted in a BFP but then m/c at 9 weeks.  The second was with frozens but found out today it was a negative.

I was just looking at this thread and saw that some people are waiting a while to find a recipient.  We have been abroad because we were told that the waiting list here is around 4 years!  We weren't even considering egg sharing for this reason but if there seems to be a "shortage", I would be interested to find out more.  

I am dark hair, dark eyes and 5ft 3 tall.

VV


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Hi vinnievinster 

I'm really not in a position to comment how long ladies are waiting for donor eggs, all I can say is that my clinic told me that there was a lack of recipients in my area. 

I'm not sure about other areas in the country, but if there are less donors/more recipients in other areas I find it astonishing that clinics cannot call around to nearby clinics and find a recipient that way. After all what is a short train journey if it means we all acheive our dreams?  

Maybe speak in depth with your clinic about it and ask if receiving donor eggs from another nearby clinic is an option, I really don't know how things work from the recipients perspective sorry  

I'm so sorry you've had a bfn hun, sending you a big   and lots of   vibes for any future tx you may have.

I have ec tomorrow and have 15 follies so fingers crossed I get lots of lovely eggies to share.

Take care and any questions feel free to ask me anytime  

Jo xxx


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## Jo1983 (Nov 12, 2007)

Cristina.....WOW I've just seen your ticker......huge congrats hun on your bfp, wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy 

   

Jo xxx


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